#and it’s valid! belle agrees ! because they do travel so much. so having more than two would be such a production

[lumiereandcogsworth]

you may have already talked about this so forgive me buuuuut what were Belle and Adam's reactions to each pregnancy? and their baby's reactions as they joined in on the fun of learning they would be getting siblings?

i have been SO excited to answer this all day. i love pregnancy discoveries/announcements SO MUCH i just think they’re so cute. (i mean, they can certainly be Not Great news, but in otp land!!!! CUTE!!!!) so without further ado, let’s get INTO IT!!

okay for their first baby… gosh i’ve probably written and rewritten this scene twenty different ways over the years. this is the BIG ONE!! the moment they go from a married couple to PARENTS!!! it’s HUGE it’s LIFE CHANGING!! i think about it all the time. and i think after all these years i finally have a scenario that i’m most happy with, that i’d really love to write and sort of insert into my canon, but just haven’t finished yet. and the funny part is that i’ve already written The Conversation™️ i just have to set it up and context and story and all that jazz. but anyway, i think it’d be such a big thing for both of them.

for belle, she really never imagined she’d get to be a mother. and i think the idea of motherhood, in a way, sort of scared her. she LOVES children for sure, but i think growing up in the village with no real prospects, no chance of getting out and being free, the idea of becoming someone’s domestic little housewife and homemaker was just such an awful idea to her. she wanted true love, she wanted a family of her own, but she just didn’t want it to be in that little provincial town with no hope of escape. and marrying someone and having their kids would just tether her there forever. and she wanted more for herself!!

so then, when she marries, idk, THE PRINCE? and becomes THE QUEEN? everything just changes. she’s not just some guy’s little wife. adam would rather die than let that happen. adam believes in her and pushes her to be as incredible as he knows she is. she has so many responsibilities in her role, she’s a freakin powerhouse!!! so when she does end up pregnant, almost a year after they get married, she’s actually quite excited by it. because she Knows she’s so much more than a homemaker. she doesn’t have to compromise herself to be a wife and mother, as she had once feared. she gets to have a baby with the love of her life and still fulfill all her own dreams. she can really do it all, your honor! so, in short, realizing she’s pregnant that first time is exciting and a huge relief knowing this isn’t the end of her life, just another chapter.

for adam it’s more like AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH !!!??!! PANIC PANIC PANIC WORRY WORRY WORRY !!!!!! but i can elaborate further. essentially, adam was never really keen on fatherhood. surprise surprise, having an abusive father and growing up suppressed and bullied and then directionless and scared and all that… didn’t really enthuse him on the idea that he’d be a great parent for any kid. despite that, of course, he did know deep down he would have to have an heir at some point. probably with some random woman who was deemed a politically advantageous match, someone he didn’t care about, the way he didn’t care about anything. but he ignored that prospect as often as possible, the same way he ignored all his other royal responsibilities. BUT! NOW? he Loves his wife……… he loves his wife so much and everything is different now. he’s a changed man now. he’s trying so hard to see the goodness in the world now. everything is brighter and it’s scary but he’s strengthened by her and supported by her and loved by her and… and… she’s pregnant 🥺

i’ve written this scene so many different ways mostly because adam’s reaction is just so… complicated. he wouldn’t be angry but i don’t think he’d be overtly happy either. he’s changed, he’s grown, but “fatherhood” is such a Deeply Rooted issue for him that i think when belle tells him, he just doesn’t even react at first. he knows he loves her and knows, logically, this is a good thing, so he holds her and starts worrying about her and starts processing this great big change in his life. and he fears becoming his father, despite the fact that it’s his mother’s kind heart beating inside him. and belle tells him there is no one else on this earth she’d rather have children with, because no one would ever believe in her the way he does. the way she believes in him. so they have lots of reassuring talks over the course of the pregnancy, and of course, that beautiful day when their first little one finally arrives, it’s just magic 🥹

GAH! first baby euphoria consumes my soul. i could talk about it forever, clearly. but i’ll move on to baby number TWO!

i actually HAVE written this fic of belle telling adam!! it’s a couple years old now so i’m tempted to not link it but it’s still how i imagine it happens in canon so it’s okay. i shan’t cringe at my old writing!! anyway, it’s christmas 1743 when belle tells adam they’ll be spending NEXT christmas with one more little angel than this year 🥰 adam is a lot happier on the second round, now that he’s been a father for a bit of time, now that he’s positively fallen in LOVE with his daughter, he’s more excited to keep growing their family. renée, however, is not even two yet when this is happening, so she really doesn’t have any thoughts about it lmao. HOWEVER, once her baby sister arrives, she is Not enthused by the sudden lack of attention. i’ve written a cute one about that so i’ll link that as well <3 i really want to write the moment renée meets juliette, i think it’d be sort of funny considering how young she was, but i just haven’t gotten around to it. my fic about the day juliette was born is already so hectic for other reasons, so it just didn’t work to write renée into it.

LASTLY!!! LE PRINCE!!!! it’s like you’re in my HEAD bro because just Yesterday i got a cute idea for how this pregnancy may be discovered. (and i have considered multiple possibilities, this is just the latest and greatest). i was imagining perhaps juliette (age 4) comes down with a cold of sorts, so belle’s been taking care of her. then belle starts to feel sick, and she just brushes it off thinking she caught juliette’s bug. but then juliette gets better and belle is still feeling like GARBAGE. and eventually it clicks that it’s because she’s pregnant <3 i think this third one catches them both off guard just a bit because the girls came so quickly one after the other and then it’s been almost five years and nothin??? i mean it’s the 18th century it’s not like they were doing anything to prevent it. (i am aware of 18th century contraception methods but these two definitely were not using them lmao). regardless, when it finally clicks, adam and belle are both just sort of like “oh shit!!!! NICE!!!!” lmao. they had gotten settled in life with their two girlies, but they’re certainly not mad about adding to their number 💖

as far as the girls’ reactions, i would also like to write that some time, but haven’t yet. in general, i think renée (who was very nearly 7) just EXPLODES with a million questions. she’s also very adamant that this baby Must be another girl (spoiler alert: it was not💙) and she’s just in general trying to be as obnoxiously involved as possible. she’s always tossing out name ideas (usually characters from the books she’s reading, but also lots of flower names like chrysanthemum and hyacinth). she also loves putting her hand on belle’s growing bump and asking “what’s the baby doing now??” like 20 times a day. (she loses her mind whenever she feels him kick🥹)

juliette, on the other hand, takes a long time to process it (it’s the autism, but also she’s just younger). but it sort of helps that, at the time, lumiere & plumette were already expecting their second child. so adam & belle could be like “you know how auntie plumette is gonna have a baby soon? well now so are WE!” and juliette’s like “oooooohhhhh 🤔 (doesn’t get it at all).” but when that baby arrives (a lil lad named xavier🥰🧡) juliette gathers what’s going on. that is a BABY. she does like feeling the baby in mama’s tummy move as well, it’s very wild to her. she’s much more quietly curious about her future little sibling than renée is, but she’s just as excited when they do finally meet him. which i HAVE written 🥹🥹🥹

AND, juliette gets the credit for giving her little brother his lifelong nickname. when her parents told her they were naming him maurice, she very quietly replied “hi, reece☺️” and he is forever called reece/reecy by his family and friends henceforth 🩵 (it also helps to differentiate from his beloved namesake grandfather!)

renée isn’t super excited about having a brother instead of another sister, (especially when lumiere and plumette already have TWO boys. (ENOUGH WITH THE BOYS IN THIS GOSH DANG CASTLE!!!😒)) but she does come to love him!! even though he’s annoying as hell!!! but it’s his gotdamn right as the little brother💛

#i can’t thank you enough my guy. i love this family more than anything 😭 #also a little side note in the vast world of my canons: in modern au. reecy’s appearance is a bit different #because in modern au… i think adam and belle WERE only planning on having two kids. so maurice was straight up an accident #I MEAN SURPRISE 😉🫶 #belle is very enthused. she’d have ten kids with adam if he let them #but ADAM is an autistic rigid planner guy (affectionate) #and they do amicably come to the agreement early on that they’ll both be happy with two kiddos #and it’s valid! belle agrees ! because they do travel so much. so having more than two would be such a production #(and two already IS) #(also they both didn’t want just one because they were both only children and neither liked it) #anyway my point is. when surprise baby number 3 happens. adam is definitely thrown for a loop #he’s not Mad but he’s just like. No!!!! The Plans I’ve Made!!!!! Aaahh!!! #he’s just autistic it’s fine <3 he’s overall happy about it!!! just had to process #he loves his baby boy sooooooo much i’m obsessed with their relationship 😭 #anyway just wanted to throw that in but wanted the post to remain in canon 💖 #thank you for asking alex. i love you <3 #batb 2017 #batb headcanons #adelle

[ladykissingfish]

Under the Mistletoe with the Akatsuki // Part Nine // Pein (Nagato)

Leader. Never in a million years did Nagato Uzumaki believe he had it in him for be a leader, and especially not one of a group of S-ranked criminals like the ones that comprised his Akatsuki. But perhaps he really wasn’t; after all, save for Konan, none of them had even met him before. All they knew about him was Pein, the body that he animated and controlled through his chakra. Yet despite all he and his group have accomplished, the nagging feeling never leaves him ... that Yahiko would have done a much better job than Nagato. It’s one of the main reasons that Nagato fashioned his main Pein-body after his old friend; to try and infuse some of Yahiko’s wisdom and charisma into his own leadership style. One of the things Yahiko often stressed was the importance of having people around you that you could trust, and depend on. In short - friends. Aside from Konan, Nagato doesn’t truly consider anyone in this organization to be his ‘friend’ ... rather, he’s come to think of the group as a whole of being his family. And apparently families played games with each other, hence why he (as Pein) agrees to this mistletoe game now.

Kisame

“Good evening, Leader.” Kisame was by far one of the more desirable members that Nagato had strived to bring into his group. Mature, experienced with battle and ninjutsu, and one of the fabled Seven Swordsmen of the Mist. In any given situation, in any conflict between members of the group, Kisame will most often be the voice of reason. Nagato chose to pair him with the young but mature beyond his years Itachi, believing they’d have much to learn from one another, and he was correct. Out of all the duos, theirs was probably the most stable (and certainly the least problematic). Despite being both tall and intimidating, the half-shark had a surprisingly gentle, almost shy nature to him when one caught him in a one on one situation, as was the case now. Kisame walks up to Pein but seems unable to take the initiative, so Pein does so himself. He puts one hand on Kisame’s shoulder, leans up slightly, and kisses his cheek. Kisame blushes and grins, before going back to his room for the evening.

Sasori

Unbeknownst to the others, aside from Konan, Sasori is the only member of the Akatsuki that knows that Pein isn’t who (or what) he presents himself to be. After all, spending years hidden inside a puppet body gave one a little leeway into seeing into (or perhaps seeing past) others’ true selves. But Sasori understands Nagato’s need to conceal his real body; in fact, he’s even helped him a few times. He’s travelled with Konan before to meet the actual Nagato, when the latter came down with an illness that Konan wasn’t sure how to treat. Sasori used his extensive knowledge of medical procedures to help Nagato, and since then, the two had become good friends. He also gave him valuable advice (again from his own experience of using chakra to control multiple puppets at once) to Nagato in how to more effectively maneuver his Six Paths of Pein bodies during battle, even helping Nagato to tweak them to better control their movements. Sasori shows Nagato (and ultimately, Pein) the same respect that he would a fellow master puppeteer. He approaches Pein now, in his own body. Pein leans down and kisses his cheek, and the two nod at each other before Sasori returns to his own room.

Itachi

“He murdered his entire clan in one evening.” “Are you sure?” “Well, all but his younger brother. But I’m sure if he ever got the chance —“ Nagato still remembers the conversation he had with Konan, the day before they brought Itachi into the Akatsuki. Nagato had been against it at first, believing that one who could commit such callous atrocities against his own clan and family would no doubt have trouble turning against a group of people that were strangers to him. But Itachi pleasantly surprised Nagato, with how calm, and quiet, and kind he was. He often forgets how young Itachi is, considering he speaks and acts like a man decades older. But still ... there was a sadness that could be felt whenever Itachi was in the room, tangible even to someone who’s “real” body was quite far away, like Nagato’s was. When Itachi comes to him, the Pein body reaches out and pulls the boy into a hug. Itachi seems surprised, but whether out of respect to the leader or because he truly needed it, he lets the embrace happen. The two stand there for longer than seems feasible, until Pein breaks it by gently kissing Itachi’s forehead. Itachi steps back, gives Pein a smile (which turns back the clock even more and makes Itachi seem like a child) and goes back to his room.

Deidara

Nagato felt real, valid concern when bringing the 15 year old Deidara into his group. Besides being the youngest, besides having that volatile temper and wanton pleasure in causing chaos and destruction ... the kid was beautiful. An odd word for a male, perhaps, but it was the most fitting term for him. In the Akatsuki it was more or less made clear that Konan was off-limits in terms of things like that, but Deidara ... with his long silky hair, big blue eyes, soft skin ... what was to stop one (or possibly ALL) of these older (and likely stronger) members from attempting to — but Nagato was lucky, in that everyone exhibited more self-control than he gave them credit for. And pairing him first with the older Sasori and then with the wily Tobi had seemed to be good choices, as well. One taught him maturity, and the other, patience. Although sometimes — “Oi, Leader ... can you talk to Kakuzu for me?” “For what?” “He won’t let me have an advance on my pay, because he says I’m just going to waste it on ‘my stupid clay’, hm!” “I do not interfere with the financial decisions of my treasurer, Deidara.” “But —“ Pein kisses his forehead and says, quietly, “Learn to exercise restraint when it comes to your artistic endeavors, Deidara.” Deidara grumbles as he walks away, and Pein smiles and shakes his head as he watches him go.

Kakuzu

“Pein. No matter what Deidara said to you, you won’t convince me to give him an advance on his pay. That boy is already three weeks into his money, and our budget simply won’t allow —“ “Do not fear, Kakuzu. I don’t intend to step on your toes regarding our finances.” Never in Nagato’s life has he met anybody quite so concerned with money as Kakuzu. He was strict not only with his own money, but every other member’s, as well. While Nagato found this to be a character flaw at first, now, he saw Kakuzu’s thriftiness and frugal tendencies as being a God-send. It was only because of him that they were able to move from hideout to hideout, to put food on the table, to buy clothes and weapons and any number of things that the group needed to survive. But his finance-savvy ways weren’t even the most impressive thing about him; it was the fact that he dealt with Hidan, day in and day out, and had not been driven to madness. The older man walks up to Pein now, lowers his mask, and delivers a light kiss to the cheek. Pein nods and watches as he leaves, noting, as he often did, his cold Kakuzu’s skin is. Nagato can feel it through Pein’s sensors; standing close to Kakuzu is much like standing in front of an open grave. He often felt that he should suggest redesigning Kakuzu’s Akatsuki robe to make it warmer, but Nagato knows that this suggestion would be rapidly rejected.

Zetsu

On the day that it is Pein’s turn under the mistletoe, Zetsu is nowhere to be found. Nagato knows where he is, of course; traveling through the earth at the speed of sound, going to scout out an enemy territory before the Akatsuki makes a move on it. Zetsu and his infiltration skills have helped Nagato countless times in the past, providing valuable intel on targets and mapping out the most problem-free routes for the rest of the group to take on missions. Still, though; there’s something about the plant-man that gave Nagato the slighter touch of unease. Being near Zetsu, even through the barrier of Pein, gave Nagato the feeling of being inches away from a wild animal. Hearing him speak was like listening to a dog that suddenly begins speaking in a human tongue. Nagato is very glad that Pein does not have to kiss this individual, and in fact hopes that his turn will end before Zetsu makes his inevitable return.

Tobi

Tobi, Tobi, Tobi ... such a confusing young man. Such a surprising young man. Many months ago, the Pein-body walked into Tobi’s room to retrieve him for something, and happened to catch him sleeping. Nagato was curious and made his artificial body approach the side of the bed that Tobi’s face was on ... but all Nagato was met with was darkness. A solid, blurred-out black where the boy’s face should have been. Nagato thought that perhaps something was malfunctioning in the Pein body’s ocular region ... but everything else was clear as a bell. Did Tobi have some kind of exterior defense mechanism set into place that would bar Pein, specifically Pein, from seeing his actual face? And if that was the case, then WHY? What exactly was he hiding?? It made Nagato nervous, but he never let this on to Tobi. “Pein-sama, Pein-sama! Is it Tobi’s turn for a kissy?!” Pein nods and Tobi approaches him, slides his mask halfway off ... and again all Pein can make out is blackness. He can feel his cheek being kissed, but his vision doesn’t return to 100% until Tobi’s mask is fully back in place. “Thanks, Pein-sama!”, Tobi says; and is it Nagato’s imagination or is there a touch of smugness to his voice? Well, regardless, the kid is leaving, and a Nagato can put him out of his mind once more.

Hidan

“I’ve had to kiss every single one of you fucks, including the old geezer and the orange idiot. Now I’ve gotta slobber with the boss too?? What’s next; are we are jumping into bed and having a group fuck?!” Nagato hadn’t rolled his eyes in many years (and rolling Pein’s eyes would have been an unbecoming gesture for a leader), but hearing Hidan speak always made Nagato want to break this self-imposed rule. With his additional bodies, his Rinnegan, his seemingly unlimited chakra and his fabled Uzumaki clan endurance, Nagato considers himself to be an earthbound God. But then this kid, this foul-mouthed violent crusader, comes into the group speaking about HIS God, Lord Jashin, and flaunting his (admittedly enviable) gift of immortality. From the very beginning, Hidan made it clear that offering sacrifices to his God was his main priority; and the kid wasn’t lying. It’s always been Pein’s (Nagato’s) mandate that as long as one completed their assigned mission, then they would be free to do as the my liked in their spare time. But Hidan’s preferred “hobby” left even someone as war-weary and hardened as Nagato feeling a bit queasy, in the pit of his stomach. “Come, Hidan.” Hidan visibly balks at being given an order; but he’s never love hesitated to obey the Leader. He goes to Pein and, after Pein studies his face, receives a kiss on the nose. The gesture is so light and whimsical that it leaves Hidan blushing and flustered, as evidenced by his leaving without uttering a single swear word.

Konan

The kiss between Konan and Pein is ... disappointingly short. Surprising, considering how close the two of them are, and how much Pein seems to care about her. But it’s a very quick forehead peck, and then both Pein and Konan retire to their rooms. The Pein-body shuts down in his own room, but Konan is getting dressed. It’s a somewhat lengthy journey, especially for this time of night, but one Konan is very familiar with. She comes every single day, after all, after everyone else is asleep or preoccupied for the evening. The old cave is so far into the woods, and from the outside seems abandoned, but ... “Nagato? I’m here.” Nagato turns his head and, although he’s happy to see her, can’t help but sigh. “You’re soaking wet.” Konan uses her cloak to wipe her face, telling him it’s not a big deal, just a little drizzle outside... but it is to Nagato. Trapped like this, a prisoner of his body and his hatred and pain ... anybody else would have walked out and left him years ago. But Konan, no matter what, she stayed by his side, and showed him more caring and comfort than Nagato felt he deserved. “I brought you some beef and curry rice tonight,” Konan said, now uncovering a small bowl. “It’s still warm.” She moves into position to feed him, and as she does, she quietly tells him little tidbits about her day. It’s solely through Konan that Nagato has any sense of the outside world at all, or any REAL idea about what the members of the Akatsuki are actually like. And he’s grateful to her. He’s grateful to her for so many — “Konan?” She looks up from where she’d been tidying up. “Yes?” “I’m so sorry.” She stops and looks at him, head tilted. “Sorry? What are you sorry about?” “I’m sorry that you’re not married, I’m sorry that you don’t have children, or a family, I’m sorry that you go from hideout to hideout and village to village and all you see is the same pain we saw when we were kids. And I’m sorry that things are only this way because of me. I couldn’t save Yahiko, and I’m destroying you, and any chance at happiness you could have had. I never meant for things to be this way. I’m —“ but Konan’s arms are around him before he can finish his sentence. “You’re a goddamn idiot,” she mumbles, her voice slightly shaky. “Yahiko dying wasn’t your fault, and my life — my life is full, and despite what you may believe, I’m happy, Nagato. This Akatsuki you’ve created; you’ve done two things. You’re fulfilling Yahiko’s dream, and you’ve given me, US, a family. So stop with this nonsense, okay?” “But I —“, and Konan interrupts him again, this time with a soft kiss on the cheek. Her lips breathe warmth and comfort into his chilled skin. “You’re the most important person on this earth to me, and I love you,” she murmurs as she pulls away, a smile on her face. “But I swear if you don’t cheer up, you’re not getting any of this dessert I made.” A pause, and then, with a smirk reminiscent of the shy boy he once was, “I’ll only cheer up if it’s something I like.” “Strawberry pie.” Nagato gives Konan an even bigger smile, to which she replies “That’s better”; and the two laugh. He feels like a weight has been lifted off of his heart. After dessert, he tries to mentally prepare himself for her leaving again ...but to his surprise she pulls a blanket from her satchel spreading it out neatly along the ground. “You’re staying tonight?” “I’m staying.” “Good. I love you, too, by the way.” “I know.” Before bed she spends a good deal of time gently brushing out his hair, telling him jokes and stories, the same that she used to do with him and Yahiko when they were all children, during those many long, cold nights when hunger or anxiety kept them awake. Neither is present now, but the goodness of the feeling remains the same. After awhile they both fall asleep, and for once their dreams are calm and peaceful.

#under the mistletoe #the akatsuki #kissing #nagato #pein #konan #kisame #itachi #zetsu #deidara #hidan #sasori #tobi #kakuzu #headcanon

[skampi835]

Corolla Promise (Yoshimoto x OC)

This is another contribution for the Unloving Characters Month event, hosted by @the-moonlight-dreams​. Because I had so much fun writing Hell of the Living starring Motonari and I’ve got to say, this turns out way longer than I’d expected (and more challenging) when I had the idea.

Fandom: Ikemen Sengoku

Language: english

Pairing: Yoshimoto x OC

Genre: Romance

Warning: hurt | comfort / angst / heavy thoughts

Prompt: Day 15 - Flower Crowns

Word Count: 2.840

It takes place years after Mitsuhides Dramatic ending. But there are aboslutely no spoilers about the route, so it’s safe to read. I hope you’ll enjoy it!

“Oh, it’s you.” An enchanting smile’s crossing Yoshimoto’s thin lips, while pressing his hand sheepishly against his chest. “My apologies. I didn’t recognize you, Ina.” Still looking a little abashed, he’s repenting his ungracious reaction, when she had reached out for him. But instead to mind his awkward wince from before, she’s gifting him with a smile as radiant as her unusual blue-grey eyes. “You don’t have to, really! I’m sorry I startled you. But it’s such a pleasant surprise, walking into you out here!”

A pleasant surprise, indeed.

Slightly shaking his head, Yoshimoto’s smiling warmly. “Please, don’t feel too sorry. I was just deeply in thoughts. I’m very happy, seeing you all well again. I was deeply worried after our last encounter.” It had been a busy farewell back then and he’ll always remember how weary she had looked. Weary but also smiling like the sun rising among the mountains. Years had passed and he always had hoped that he’ll see her again someday. “I didn’t expect to meet someone I’d actually know, especially in such a reclusive disguise.” His golden eyes wander over her delicate frame, examining the pale and inconspicuous Yukata she’s wearing. It was a waste of her beauty, covering her in such a simple cloth.

“O-oh well... it’s no disguise in particular.” Ina says nervously and for a moment lost for words.

“I see, so is the Kitsune in Shirakawa as well?” Yoshimoto still remains calm while almost watching her tenderly, while he’s questioning her. Even if the mere reference of him, is riling him to the core. Pressing her lips to a thin line while a grievous expression is clouding Inas lovely face, before she’s looking to the ground and breaking the eye contact with him. Seeing her fine expression turning that way, a longing hope is elevating warmly in Yoshimoto’s heart. “No” she answers, sighing exasperatingly. “He’s not even in Shimotsuke. But to be honest, I ran some errands for him out here.”

Absorbed in thoughts Yoshimoto lightly nods, and then stops abruptly. “Wait... All by own?” He asks, his golden eyes widening with disbelief. Hesitantly she’s answering with a nod and a sough is slipping from his lips. “You’re awfully far away from your home, Ina! It’s not safe for a woman to travel that distance alone!”

“Stop scolding me! Besides you’re awfully far away from Echigo yourself!” she retorts, puffing her cheeks in a huff. It almost looks lovingly, but this isn’t the time to falter under her beauty. “I’m not a woman, but a man.” Yoshimoto argues drily, trying to wear those dreadful thoughts down of everything what could have happen to her on such a long journey. Her delightful snickering sounds awfully out of place, ringing like tiny bells in his ears. “You’re fanning too hard, Yoshimoto.”

He didn’t even notice, till she’s mentioning it. Doubting himself Yoshimoto closes his iron-ribbed fan, while she’s going on: “I’m quite aware of the dangers, Yoshimoto. You really don’t have to give me that look.”

“I’m quite unsure about the validity of those words, Ina.” Yoshimoto’s reprimanding her unadorned. Even her calming and confident smile couldn’t soothe him. How could this sly old fox let her travel that far and on top of that, all by herself? An unpleasant wave of chagrin is crawling through his body and clenching his heart with cold grief. Yoshimoto’s hoping that none of these feelings are showing through the surface as he continues. “When you’ve finished what you’re here for, I’ll accompany you for your return.”

“What?” Ina inhales sharply and quickly shakes her head. “No, you don’t have to, really!”

“I won’t accept a no as an answer.” Yoshimoto unusually unfaltering retorts, while he’s giving her an extremely strict look, which silences her. But with a sigh his face is softening and a contrite smile is curving his lips. “I’d like not to argue with you any further on that, Ina. I’d never forgive myself, if anything bad will happen to you on your way back. Besides…” he appends and is tenderly cupping her cheek with one hand “your Kitsune would be devastated.”

Seeing a wounded sparkle in her bright eyes flicker, is filling his heart with sorrow. But before he could ask, Ina’s lifting her hand, lowering it on his, which is still touching her soft cheek. “Okay. Thank you, for your concern and I’m sorry for the trouble tough.” Surprised about her firm grip with which she’s hesitantly shifting his hand from her cheek, Yoshimoto obeys yieldingly. Something in her touch doesn’t feel right, but he couldn’t pronounce it. But it was free from the lightness all of her moves usually accompany. Almost naturally his fingers twine with hers carefully.

As fast as her hurt look has appeared on her face, it’s blurring now with flattering confusion. Her lips curves into a shy smile and her eyes are uneasily darkening, while she’s giving his hand a tender squeeze, before withdrawing. Crossing her hands conscientiously behind her back, she eyes Yoshimoto with lightly rosy cheeks. “So... where is your horse?” she’s asking.

His enchanting smile’s growing slightly distant, however he obeys her intentionally change of subject without opposition. For he’s also wondering about his own daring move.

_____

“I think this is as far as I can bring you, Ina.” Yoshimoto is barely able to hide his disappointment about the fact, as they’re passing a very small village nearby Azuchi. After their departure they’ve traveled for three days by horse with some sufficient stops. Yoshimoto will always cherish these lovely pleasant days and evenings they were spending, in his heart even if they were exhausting. Alas, he challenged his fortune with this journey more than enough and traveling further means risking blowing his cover and he’s not willed to end in the dungeons of Azuchi.

Ina’s looking at him with her charming features atop from her horse, an insecure smile’s clouding it. “What a shame. I’d hoped I could invite you to an inn when we’ll reach Azuchi. They’re serving really some good Manju there.”

A sudden desire shades Yoshimoto's thoughts to simply give in to her request, but it flows by as he’s noticing her blankly expression. “It will bring no good to you, neither me, if I get caught.” He says, hoping to satisfy her. Yoshimoto inclines his head slightly, his golden eyes are wandering thoughtfully over her facial expressions. With a soft honeyed voice he asks: “Maybe it’s none of my concern, but I think it will help you, if you’re telling me, what’s bothering you, Ina?”

Her gaze rambles from him to the way ahead, so he’s admiring her image from the side. His soft smile fades for a mere moment at her taciturnity, nevertheless he’s urging himself to craft it anew and continues tenderly: “I won’t force you, but this may be the last time we'll see each other for a long time and I would abhor it, if my staying impression of you, would be how miserable you’re looking.”

Focusing worried at Yoshimoto with her blue-grey eyes, Ina quietly retorts: “I would hate that, too.” Nodding in the direction above a field she goes on: “Behind this hill is a lake. Let’s water the horses there and then we can talk.”

Relieved Yoshimoto agrees and leads his horse to follow hers to the lake. After they cared about the horses, they rested beneath an azalea. Yoshimoto watches her, while she’s picking up some flowers, which had fallen, into her lap. Patiently he’s waiting, till she was ready opening to him. Surely she’s picking her words thoughtfully. Yoshimoto knew her as a beautiful woman, radiant like light, always wearing her hart on her tongue. Watching her so reticent, is gnawing his heart.

“I have to insist, that what I’m going to tell you now, has to stay between us, Yoshimoto.” Her gaze is determinant, while she’s setting it on Yoshimoto. An unpleasant shiver’s running through his spine as he forebodes the gravely situation. “I see.” He says heavily. “When this is about the war, the rumors seem to be true, I assume?”

Pressing her lips to a thin line and dropping her gaze to the flowers, she had weaved, he fears that she’d stop the conversation. But she doesn’t, as she’s just nodding with weariness in her bright eyes. “Yes. The Mouri Clan is rising from the west, pressing hard against our borders.” Her slender fingers are twiddling the flowers, twining them inexpertly. “When you’d tell someone in Kasugayama Castle, then...”

“Your worries may be justified, but it’s me you’re talking to.” His harsh words are silencing her and with a more gently tone now he adds. “I despise war. I would never dream of implying something to achieve advantage in such cruel doing.” Even after his shattered Imagawa Clan has found shelter in Echigo, he’d never allow himself of getting revenge in such a barbarous way. Even when he’s standing in the debt of Uesugi he could never-...

Yoshimoto draws his iron-ribbed fan from his sleeve, opening it and starts fanning, in the hope it would blow away the dreadful memories that are haunting him. “I know.” Ina says soothing, a gentle smile brightening her clouded face lightly. “Thank you.” A soft, heavy sigh escaping her lips, when she thoughtfully continues, gazing at the flowers in her lap: “Right now, they’re doing a huge effort in Azuchi to prevent the worst. But I have doubts. What if it isn’t enough? What if the Mouri Clan succeeds and turns the tables? They’re going to change the-”

Stopping in her sentence, she’s pressing her lips together again, clenching the twined flowers in her lap, while her eyes are glazing. Seeing her desperate and trembling like that, is aching his heart. Giving in his urges, Yoshimoto grabs her, embracing her fragile body like she was glass. “You mustn’t think like that, Ina.” he convincingly says, pressing her against his chest, feeling her heart pounding in the same rhythm of his own. “Nothing will happen to you.”

“But I’m so afraid, Yoshimoto.” Her silent cry sends shivers over him and it’s getting hard to swallow. Still pressing her slender figure tightly against his chest, which is trembling in his arms while she's crying softly, is robbing his breath. For it were the fearless, brave actions, the easygoing and cheerful smile and the bright beauty of hers, he’s owing his life to. When it wouldn’t be for her, he would have fallen long ago, with the ruins of his shattered clan. Seeing her now in so much pain, hurts his heart. Slightly he’s relaxing his grip on her, drawing little circles over her back, in the hope to soothe her. “I’m sure Azuchi will do everything in its might to repel the Mori. After all the Oda empowers an enormous military force. Trust me.”

Yoshimoto had spoken these words mildly for her and with rising bitterness he knows how very true they are. Even if he despises this enormous power that Nobunaga holds in his palms. His own Imagawa-Clan had faced that domineering might and is suffering till this day from this devastating clash. The reputation of his clan had faded within the flicker of an eye and so many lives were cruelly taken, so much pain unleashed this sharp deep wound, they would never recover from.

When it hasn't been for Ina, he had given gladly his life, to release his Imagawa Clan, whose got haunted by the ghosts of his past, furiously trying impossible tasks to gain their old glory again. But his clan had never recovered, nor will they ever get the chance to recover from this ravaging deep scar Nobonaga had left in their ranks when he had sunk his sword into them.

“And even if they’ll fail…” Yoshimoto continues after a short while. "you still will be safe, Ina. I will make sure of that and this is a promise.” Yoshimoto's whispering in her ear like a secret that nobody should know. On one hand he wished for her to recognize that his feelings for her never faltered since all this time that passed. That she had been the bright light, which had kept him alive. But on the other hand, his selfish wish could force a rift between them, tearing these admirable little moments they're having now, apart.

Surprisingly she responds, in reclining against his chest, allowing herself to relax in his embrace. Her breathes are steadily tickling against his neck, sending warm shivers over his back. “Thank you for comforting me, Yoshimoto.” Ina says and her voice sounds so quiet he just can barely understand. “I… I just don’t know what to say. You’ve waited all this time... wasting your time for someone so ungrateful like me-” She’s swallowing hard in guilt, pressing her head in his shoulders trembling.

No… I should’ve been more carefully with my wishes, my words and my longings. “I would wait forever if it means to wait for you, Ina.” Yoshimoto says gently, before twining his fingers lightly in her beautiful hair, stroking it carefully. He doesn’t ment to make her feel that awful, when she realizes his feelings. Yet his heart’s yearning to say so much more, but Ina is already shedding tears guilty, muffling her weeps in his shoulder. He had hurt her so much with his careless actions and words of affection, how could he ever forgive himself, when he's making her even more cry?

Yoshimoto’s quite aware of the position in which his openly words had brought Ina. Standing, between the man she had given her heart and him who had just doubtingly confessed. He feels riven between his long withheld yearnings and the overflowing guilt. He doesn’t want to make her choose, because he knows her heart belongs to another and the only reason, she’s not shoving him back right now is because of the fears burdening on her shoulders and her mind.

He wished to share soft words of how beautiful she is. How much he adores her for her carefree smile and her kind heart. But alas, he wasn’t born for this cruel, dark world, and so wasn’t she. Yoshimoto would never dream of taking advantage of her state to pressurize her. So he kept silence, comforting her with soothing circles over her back, absorbing the feeling of her warm body against his and listens to her soft breathes.

“Yoshimoto?” she asks, lightly lifting her head to gaze into his golden eyes. “This isn’t right.”

Her words are gruesomely squashing his heart, even if he knows they were so true. “I beg your pardon, Ina.” He croaks, still his arms don’t want to let go of her to give her free. Amazingly she doesn’t intent to let go of him, either. Ina gazes into his eyes with the bright blue-grey eyes of hers deeply into his, that Yoshimoto’s thinking that she’s looking into his very soul. “You don’t fully understand. It’s not just my husband, but it’s so, so unbelievingly cruel for you. Yet you still managed to soothe me, planting an idea in my thoughts. But I could never ask for you to wait any longer.”

His heart is crying loudly and triumphantly, veiling in unbelivingly happiness, as her words are reaching him. With a gentle smile Yoshimoto’s cupping her cheek. His thumb softly wipes a tear from her swollen eye. “Please, don’t think too hart on my account.” With a quiet gulp Ina nods, sheepishly lifting her head. Her bright blue-grey eyes are shimmering strangely determinant. “When the worst is about to come, will you still wait for me?”

His answer comes without hesitation. “Always.”

Ina’s nodding again, rising on her knees to face him. Then she reaches out for him. He doesn’t move, when she’s placing a corolla of red azaleas she had weaved before, onto his head. Yoshimoto is widening his golden eyes bewildered, when she’s lowering her head to him, placing a shy, soft kiss on his cheek. “I promise, to call for your aid, when the time comes. If this happens--”, she pauses, then continues invigorate her voice. “Will you still love me?”

 _____

Crowned with flowers Yoshimoto’s watching Ina, while she mounts her horse and leaves back to the way, which leads her towards Azuchi after he’d given her his answer. He’s watching her silhouette getting smaller, while the enchanting smile he’s wearing grows distant. Finally when Ina disappeared completely, Yoshimoto’s leaning with his back against the tree behind him.

His thoughtful gaze is lifting up to the blooming azalea above him. How very fateful. A tender smile’s curving his thin lips, when the sun begins to sink. Doesn’t the azalea represent modesty and patience?

Regardless of all the patience he’d already had given, he would wait forever for her. Even if this promise will never come true, Yoshimoto's feeling how the hope washes through his heart, waking the lovingly longing he does held for Ina anew. Of course he’s not wishing misfortune her, for however this war will turn, he’ll always adore her.

#ikemen sengoku #ikesen #fanfiction #ikesen fanfic #ikemen sengoku fanfiction #ikesen fanfiction #ikesen fic #ikesen yoshimoto #unloved-otome-2021 #unloved otome 2021 #yoshimoto imagawa #ikesen yoshimoto fanfic #ikesen yoshimoto fanfiction

[ace-in-a-shopping-cart]

Asexual

Summary: Virgil believes he is broken. Logan is determined to prove him wrong, even if he has to cross the country to do it.

Word Count:  1,450

Taglist: (Send an ask to be added or removed!) @starlocked01​​​ @spoopy-turtle​​​ @lizluvscupcakes​​ @more-fandon-than-friends​

NOTE: I am in no way trying to make light of abusive relationships.

Virgil curled up on his bed, his laptop open to the side as the usual video call app loaded. He had popcorn in his lap, a blanket thrown over him, and his favorite movie was ready to be played. All that was missing was the best friend. Looking at the computer, he pouted at how slow it was loading. “Load already.” He grumbled.

It was movie night for the two besties that lived on opposite sides of the country, Virgil’s turn to pick the movie. Finally, the chat app dinged the usual tones that indicated it was loaded and Virgil pulled the device onto his lap, nearly spilling his popcorn in his excitement. He found Logan’s profile easily as it was one of the three he had on there.

The call connected and Logan’s face filled the screen, causing Virgil’s stomach to fill with butterflies even as he felt his heart rate slow. “Hyello.” Virgil said in his worst Russian accent.

Logan just laughed, an expression of joy that lit his whole face up. “Hello to you too. Do you have your movie set up?”

Virgil nodded, putting the computer down in a way that allowed Logan to face him. They’d figured out pretty early on that watching a video through a video was a horrible experience that neither wanted to repeat. So, they just watched the movie independently and faced each other while doing it so they could see the other’s reactions and still enjoy the movie together. 

The movie night, which happened around six in the evening for Virgil, went smoothly at first. That was, until the movie ended and they started talking. The talking started when Logan was critiquing the movie but it soon turned to love life. Virgil was sure Logan didn’t mean to steer it that way, the conversation just flowed like that. Virgil had to get up, taking the computer with him as he went to the kitchen to grab more popcorn.

“Look, Virgil. All I’m saying is that some people don’t have healthy ideas of what love is. You should know, because of you-”

Virgil held up a hand. “Don’t. I thought we agreed that some things were best left behind us? That’s one topic I thought you’d know to avoid.”

Logan sighed, obviously taken aback. “Virgil, I didn’t mean it that way. I just meant that your previous relationship left you with-”

Virgil sighed, feeling the anger build and knowing the other emotions would quickly follow. “Logan, I don’t want to talk about this right now.”

Logan groaned, a hand going through his hair in clear frustration. “I’m just trying to say that you are worthy of love, Virgil! You aren’t broken and your ex is a pilgaric!” His words rushed out, as if he were afraid Virgil was going to silence him again.

Virgil paused. “What is a pilgaric?”

“An asshole.” Logan said it reluctantly, as if he much preferred the other word.

Virgil nodded. “That he was.”

“Virgil, he still is. He is still damaging you even now, even though he is out of your life completely.”

Virgil nodded. “I already know that, Logan.”

“You don’t seem to.” His voice was soft, making Virgil want to turn to look at him. Instead, he kept his back to him and fiddled with things on his counter, cleaning the already clean space.

“Why do you say that?” Virgil felt a need to know.

“Because I know that you still cry yourself to sleep, you still shake at the mention of his name, you still have such a low self esteem. None of it was your fault, you know? You’re smart, but sometimes love blinds that.”

Virgil shook his head. “I should have been more vigilant. I should have noticed everything from the start. I should have been better.”

Logan’s voice came again, still soft and quiet, almost tender. “No one is perfect, Virgil. You are not at fault for what happened to you.”

Virgil shrugged. “Good night, Logan.”

“Wait!” Logan spoke up again. As Virgil had turned to face the camera, he noticed Logan had a hand up as if it were going to stop him.

“Yes?”

“I will be traveling for work in the next few days. If there is anything you need, you can still reach me by text, just not video calls.”

Virgil gave him a thumbs up. “Noted.” He hung up the call before putting a lid on his snacks, no longer hungry.

The next few days found Virgil falling back into his graphic design work with extra vigor, desperate to erase the thoughts of his ex from his mind. When he finally came out for air, it was due to the doorbell ringing. He stood, not caring that he was in his sweats. That uncaring attitude took a turn when he realized it was Logan outside his door. Virgil left his there, the door half open, as he disappeared into his bedroom with a squeak of surprise.

Logan just chuckled. “I’ve seen you in sweats multiple times, Virgil. This is nothing new.” Still, he waited in the living room for Virgil to make himself presentable. 

Virgil came back out in ripped jeans and an old t-shirt, an improvement but still grunge clothes. “Now I at least feel like a human.” He muttered. “What are you even doing here?” This was said louder.

“I came to see you and to prove just how wrong you are.”

Virgil frowned in confusion, their last conversation successfully buried in his mind. “Prove me wrong about what.”

Logan patted the spot on the couch next to him and Virgil sat, curling his feet under himself and resisting the temptation to lean into Logan’s warmth. Logan held up his right hand, showing a black band circling his middle finger. “Do you know what this is?”

Virgil shook his head. “No, what is it?”

“It is an indication that people in my community use to signal to others that they are in the same community. Like when someone has a secret password and only those who know the password are allowed in.”

“Okay. What community is this?”

“Have you ever heard of the word ‘asexual’?”

“Yeah. It’s when a plant creates offspring with the same exact genetic code as the parent. It could be considered cloning. What does that have to do with a ring?”

“That’s asexual reproduction. There is a type of asexual that humans experience as well. It has the root word ‘sexual’ which is pretty self-explanatory, it also has the prefix ‘a-’ which means ‘without’. Together, it creates a definition of ‘without sexual attraction’.”

“You’re telling me this because my ex’s main reason for abusing me is I refused to have sex with him, aren’t you?”

“Exactly. I think you might also be asexual.”

“Huh.” Virgil sat back a bit, hand curling around his ankle as he thought. “What other things classify someone as asexual?”

“A lack of sexual attraction is really the only thing. It is a valid sexual orientation, just like being homosexual, pansexual, or any other sexual orientation is.”

Virgil nodded. “You know, it sounds like it fits.” He thought for a bit longer before a different thought invaded his head. “Wait. Did you travel all the way here just to tell me this?”

Logan laughed. “No, that was just the first thing I wanted to tell you.” He put his arm around Virgil’s shoulders, drawing him close. “I also wanted to tell you that I’m always here for you.”

Virgil could feel his cheeks heating up. He stood abruptly. “I’m gonna go get my laptop. Maybe we could research asexual a bit more.”

Logan seemed disappointed but nodded. Virgil scurried off to get it, sitting back down in the same exact position when he got back. Logan’s arm was a comforting weight around his shoulders as he looked into something that could answer some questions he had about himself. 

A year later

Virgil declared it movie night and asked Logan to pick one from their shared collection, having combined them once Logan moved in. He grabbed the snacks and came back to see the main menu for Beauty and the Beast on the screen. “Why that one?” He asked, settling next to his boyfriend.

Logan chuckled, pulling him close. “Think about it. Belle doesn’t care about looks, preferring to focus on personality. Also, anyone who marries someone who looks like a literal monster is either really weird, or has to be asexual.”

Virgil chuckled, linking their hands together and letting the light shine off their black rings. “Okay. It’s a go for me.”

Logan dropped a kiss on the top of his head. “Glad you agree, kitten.”

#logan sanders #virgil sanders #analogical #fanfic #ace writes

[let-it-raines]

Catch Me If You Can (16/?)

298 days. That’s how long Killian Jones was away from a baseball field. It’s less than a year, only part of a season for him, but it might as well have lasted a decade as he alternated between physical therapy and spending an excessive amount of time sitting on his couch.

But then he came back and won the World Series.

It’s something no one saw coming, and it’s certainly not something anyone who knows about his arm would predict. Now it’s a new season with new possibilities, and anything could happen. On-field reporter Emma Swan will be there to cover it all even if she is not his biggest fan right now.

Asking her out live on-air will do that.

Rating: Mature

A/n: If you like, read, kudo, comment, tag flail, reblog, or anything else, I see you, and I appreciate you! Honestly, it’s the coolest thing how many of you are out there, and every time I find out someone else has been reading, my heart grows Grinch style ❤️

We’re off to London in this chapter and the next one! Fun fact: the Yankees and Red Sox really did play a series in London this year! 

AO3: Beginning | Current

Tumblr: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 |15 | 16 | 

Tag list: @xellewoods @galaxyzxstark @eala-captian @mariakov81 @ultraluckycatnd @royalswan @shey-starsfury @sals86 @iam2307 @ashley-knightingale @karenfrommisthaven @scientificapricot @captswanis4vr @ultimiflos @jamif @idristardis @nikkiemms @resident-of-storybrooke @tiganasummertree @bmbbcs4evr @onceuponaprincessworld @jennjenn615 @mayquita @captainsjedi @teamhook @notoriouscs @kmomof4 @ekr032-blog-blog @cs-forlife @andiirivera @jonirobinson64 @qualitycoffeethings @thejollyroger-writer

-/-

“This is weird,” Will mutters as they walk the unfamiliar hallways of London Stadium on their way out to the field to practice. “I’m not used to being unfamiliar with a place where we’re about to play, and I swear that I’m still jet-lagged. Why did they think we were going to get used to the time change in one day?”

Instinctively, Killian wants to get onto Will about complaining since that’s become his thing as of late, but every point that he’s made is valid. It’s weird to be in a place that he doesn’t know. He’s familiar enough with half of the baseball stadiums in America to be able to give a tour like he made the blue prints for them, but they are decidedly not in America.

They’re in London.

To play the Red Sox.

So. Fucking. Cool.

His job awards him more opportunities than he ever could have dreamed about as a kid from Ohio, and while he’s had the opportunity to travel to Mexico and Canada, he’s never been overseas like this. He meant to go years ago, but then the accident happened and all of his plans went down the drain. He could have gone then too. He had all of the time in the world on his hands, and he squandered it by sitting on his ass and not traveling or doing all of the other things he’s always wanted to do.

He��ll have all the time in the world when he’s retired.

Woah, no. That’s not happening anytime soon, and he is not going down that road when things are going so well right now.

They’re going to kick some Red Sox ass even while in England.

His family didn’t fly all the way over here on vacation just for them to lose. Addy and Lucy would be very disappointed in him if they did because he knows for a fact that they only care about being here for the baseball and Addy’s birthday party tomorrow.

All of the cool kids turn six in London, obviously, and Addison Jones is the coolest of the kids.

It’s all she’s been talking about for weeks now, going on and on about how she was going to have an English birthday party and be English like Peppa Pig and Meghan Markle. He didn’t have the heart to tell her that Peppa Pig is animated and that Meghan Markle was technically American first, but some things kids just don’t have to know. All she knows is that a real-life prince and his wife are going to be at the game today, and she thinks that’s the coolest thing in the world.

It kind of is even if he had to study a protocol list for when he met them earlier in the locker room.

Killian’s life is so goddamn weird, but he loves it.

The fact that Emma got to travel here as well, even if she’s not doing on-camera coverage and is simply here as a print journalist for the team, makes it all the better. He may not get to see her on-field during the game, but he’ll see her afterwards.

Hopefully.

They haven’t been here long, but it’s already difficult to find time away from his family to see her, even if it’s only for a moment.

He’d give anything to have those little moments.

“I have no idea,” Killian yawns, finally responding to Will as they push the doors open and walk out to the field. He can tell that the set-up is going to throw him off, the way the stadium is equal on every side, and that the AstroTurf feels odd below his feet. But that’s why they practice. “We’ll suffer through it, and drink lots and lots of coffee.”

“I think they drink tea over here.”

“I believe that they drink coffee too. You want to start in the outfield and work our way back in?”

“Yeah, that’s fine.”

The two of them are quiet as they take it all in and try to get used to this new place. Music blares over the speakers, and the rest of the team filters in and out as they go through their warm-ups. He’s not sure if he really needs coffee for how hyped up he is to be here and to be playing their biggest rivals, and the crash of caffeine always seems so inevitable. The crash of adrenaline, not so much. Most of the time.

It’s a quick warm-up, one that doesn’t extend too much effort on his part, and his shoulder is feeling loose after the massage Archie gave it. They’ve won each of their series against the Sox so far this season, and he doesn’t plan on that changing now. When they finally travel to Boston next month, sure. But not today.

No part of him should be thinking this, especially with how unreliable his arm can be, but they’re playing so well this season that he can’t imagine them not making the playoffs and then being in the final two.

They could be back-to-back World Series Champions.

But that’s very much counting his chickens before they hatch, and that always leads to disappointment.

He simply can’t go there even if his brain keeps trying to.

“You guys make any wedding plans yet?” he asks Will as they walk back infield to practice a few pitches on the mound.

“We’ve been engaged for exactly a week, so no, we haven’t made any official plans. Belle has all of these ideas, though, and she’s been talking through them with her parents. Honestly, I think we may get married in December or January of this year since she doesn’t want to do it during the season.”

Killian nods his head in agreement as he tucks his chain back into his uniform from where it had fallen out. “That makes sense. It’s always hell trying to plan anything during the season. Even making dinner plans can be difficult.”

“Well,” Will says, clicking his tongue, “it’s not like you have anyone to be going out to dinner with. We don’t count. Neither does Liam.”

A protest is on the tip of his tongue, but he can’t say anything, not yet. He and Emma are going to talk about that after this trip, and even if they do, he’s not sure he’ll be able to tell Will. He should. Will and Robin. And Eric and Ariel. But no one else on the team. It’s just too risky.

That might put a damper in his plan to kiss her before every game.

But the time will come. It has to. And baby steps are fine with him when they mean that steps are happening. He completely and totally understands Emma and her reasons for not wanting their relationship out in the open, and he agrees. It’s better for her, for both of them, and they’ve only been together for two months. In the grand scheme of things, that’s not that long. It doesn’t matter that he fell hard and fast. That doesn’t escalate things.

It just…complicates his feelings.

This thing won’t be hidden away forever, not if they want any kind of future, and while he’d never presume to speak for Emma, he damn well intends to have that future.

“I could be dating,” Killian scoffs at Will who only rolls his eyes in response. “What? I could.”

“Nothing,” Will shrugs, taking position behind home plate. “I’m just saying, for a man who everyone thinks is going home with a new woman every night, you are particularly lacking in the women department.”

His jaw ticks, and he’s not even sure why. He’s never minded talking about his relationships in the past, not to Will, but it’s probably the lie. Of course it’s the lie.

“And what’s wrong with that?”

“Nothing,” Will grunts as he throws the ball back to him, a light thwacking sound hitting his glove. “Do whatever the hell you want. I’m not someone to tell you what to do with your life. I’m just saying, I’m much happier having Belle be a part of my life.”

“Look at you being all sweet.”

“I have my moments.”

“I’m totally giving a speech at your wedding about the night that I kept you from throwing up on her.”

“I would have expected nothing less from you. In fact, I’ve already warned Belle. It was in my proposal speech.”

“Shut up, you asshole.”

“Never. I know you love the sound of my voice.”

“It is rather dreamy.”

“You two are talking too much to be practicing,” Eric huffs as walks toward them with his bat in hand, fiddling with it the slightest bit. “What are we talking about?”

“Killian’s lack of a love life.”

Eric grunts at that, eyes scanning between the two of them. “That sounds like a conversation that I don’t want to be in because Ariel will somehow know and insist we talk about it later. She’ll have you set up on ten blind dates before midnight.”

“It’s in my contract that she can’t meddle in my dating life.”

“Really?” Eric and Will ask at once, their eyes going wide.

“No,” Killian chuckles as he stretches out his shoulder and bends his legs a bit, squatting down to stretch out some more, “but sometimes I wish that it was. Where has she been all day, by the way?”

“She’s helping set up Addison’s birthday party for tomorrow, apparently. She’s somehow gotten them a separate suite here, and they’re doing some sort of tea party during the game. You have even been given express permission to sit with your family instead of in the dugout with us.”

Of course. He could have done that anyways, but leave it to Ariel to make sure that there is no way in hell that he’s missing his niece’s sixth birthday party. She is pure magic, that woman.

“Your wife is something else,” he chuckles, deciding to step closer to them so that he doesn’t have to shout, “but you guys know that Addy is fully going to expect all of you to show up at some point.”

“Her present is in my suitcase.” Will smiles as he says it with a slight shake of his head. “I could never forget my biggest fan since Roland seems to betray me on who his favorite player is every week.”

Killian clicks his tongue. “Eh, just to be clear, I’m Addison’s favorite player. I’m not letting you steal that title from me.”

-/-

Killian spots Emma sitting nine rows up behind third base when they’re in the second inning.

She’s wearing a jersey…his jersey, and when he notices it, he nearly pegs Johnson with a ball.

Holy fuck.

It sends blood straight to his groin, and the only thing that stops it is him thinking about Emma making a joke about him having a boner on the mound. She’s so ridiculously funny in her bad jokes, and it brings a smile to his face that he has to control as he focuses on the game. He can’t be losing it when he’s in the middle of a game.

But damn. His girlfriend is wearing his jersey, his name and number printed on the back, and she’s got a baseball cap pulled low over her forehead with her blonde ponytail sticking out behind her. He wouldn’t have recognized her if he didn’t know every inch of her body.

He’ll play in London every day of the week if it means Emma can watch as a semi-spectator without anyone recognizing her.

A bloody siren. That’s what she is.

-/-

They win that night.

-/-

After the game when Emma walks into the locker room, her phone in hand for questions, she’s not wearing the jersey anymore. It’s been removed, and she’s wearing a black blouse that’s low cut enough that he can see the slightest bit of the cups of her bra. He’d bet that she didn’t think through having to remove his jersey when she got dressed, but he doesn’t mind how she looks.

He never does.

(She wore his fucking jersey.)

Except he can’t do anything about it but smile and answer her questions as well as everyone else’s. It’s a bit odd for her to not have Jeff following her around with the camera, but he knows that this means she’ll be writing an article instead. She’s always loved that.

Once all of the press members ask their questions, most of them British journalists, they filter out of the locker room, leaving everyone to strip out of their uniforms and move to take a shower. He’s taking off his belt when Arthur speaks, and his fingers still over the leather.

“I don’t know how any of us aren’t fucking Emma,” he grumbles, and the words make disgust drip down Killian’s spine. “Have you seen her body? I bet she’s fucking amazing in bed. I’d fuck her in a heartbeat. Damn am I glad women work in baseball now.”

The room goes silent, every man stopping what he’s doing, and Killian has words on the tip of his tongue but can’t say anything because Will is already talking.

“Fuck off, King,” Will curses, throwing his gear down on the ground. “I mean, seriously. What the bloody fuck? How shitty do you have to be to talk about someone like that? I knew you were an ass, but God, that’s next level. First of all, you’re fucking married, and even if you weren’t, that woman is a human being. You don’t get to talk about her like that.”

“Oh, come on, man. We’re all thinking it. Did you see her boobs just now? It’s nothing to get riled up about.”

“Yeah, yeah it is,” Will huffs as he crosses his arms over his chest. “The fact that you don’t realize that is just plain sad. She’s not coming in here to get ogled by you. She’s coming in here to do her job, and she’s damn good at it.”

Arthur rolls his eyes, and Killian’s blood boils even more. “Jones asked her out. How is that not the same thing?”

“Because he didn’t ask her out because he thinks of her as a sex object,” Will spits all the while Killian can barely hear any of this from the way his heart is thumping between his ears, a drum beat that’s louder than anything he’s ever heard.

Arthur darkly chuckles, and it’s that sound that has the drumline stopping so that his eyes snap over across the room. Killian didn’t even realize that he was clenching his fists, but when he looks down, he can see the red imprints of blood from where his nails were digging into his skin.

“Jones,” Arthur yells, “aren’t you going to back me up here? Isn’t she a fine piece of ass?”

“Shut the fuck up,” Killian yells before standing from the seat in his locker, quickly striding across the room until he and Arthur are eye-to-eye and completely lined up. Arthur’s got this disgusting cocky grin on his face, one that makes unpleasant chills run down his spine, and it’s taking everything in him not to punch the ever-loving shit out of the man. “Will is right. You’re an asshole, and you can’t be talking about her that way.”

“Why do you care so much? What, are you fucking her?”

And that’s when his first rises and slams into Arthur’s jaw, a sting spreading through his knuckles and up to his elbow. The drum starts beating in his head again, his heart pumping blood through him faster than normal, and everything is a blur as he moves his head to dodge Arthur’s punch and as someone grabs onto elbows and pulls him back and out of the room all the while a screaming match goes on in the locker room, every word muted to him except for the one name that keeps getting repeated.

Emma.

“Are you insane?” Robin gasps, and when Killian looks around, he can see that he’s been pulled off to the weight room that they’re using in this stadium. He didn’t even know Robin was in the locker room at the time. “You can’t punch Arthur no matter how big of an asshole he is. You’re going to fuck up your arm, and you can get suspended for weeks.”

“I don’t really care about either of those things right now.”

“Well you should,” Robin huffs, running his hands through his hair as he paces back and forth over the carpeted floor. “He’s an asshole. We all know that, and I wanted to punch him too…but you just can’t, mate. He’ll get his due, and it won’t come at the cost of your career.”

Robin is right. Robin is always right, but how is he supposed to sit there and let Arthur talk about his girlfriend like that? How is he supposed to let him talk about any woman like that? He simply can’t, and even though his knuckles hurt like hell right now and Archie is most definitely going to kill him, he doesn’t regret it. He can’t, and he’d bet that Will doesn’t either.

“Fuck,” Killian mutters, sitting down on a weight bench and burying his face in his hands as he tries to flex some of his fingers out. “Dammit. This isn’t how today was supposed to go. I’m not supposed to be punching our outfielder in a locker room in fucking London. I’m supposed to be enjoying my time and sipping tea at my niece’s birthday party because I’m this good guy that she looks up to when really everyone is a piece of shit.”

“Dramatic much?”

“Shut up.”

“Never,” Robin laughs as the door opens and Al stumbles inside, his long dark hair pushed back behind his ears and his tanned skin painted red in what Killian hopes is a sunburn and not anger.

“What the hell, Jones?” Al screeches, waling right up to him so that the tips of their shoes touch. “You punched King? With your right arm? What is going on in that head of yours?”

Killian groans, already ready to have his ego bruised and his career kicked by a man who is only four years older than him, and he straights his back so that Al isn’t look down at him as much as he should be.

“Are you in here to suspend me?”

Al’s brows furrow together. “What? No. Why would I suspend you?”

“Because I punched Arthur?”

Al waves him away, backing up the slightest bit. “No, I’m not going to suspend you for that. King can be a piece of shit sometimes, and I heard some of the stuff he was saying. He deserved that. My team are not going to be a bunch of sexist assholes who talk about our reporters that way. I can’t guarantee that there won’t be some kind of league suspension, but I doubt King takes it anywhere since then he’s had to explain the stuff he was saying.”

“Then why are you yelling at me?”

“Because you punched someone with your pitching arm, and I can’t have you messing up your arm again. Go see Archie right now, and get some damn ice on the thing.”

“Aye, aye, Captain,” Killian mock salutes, his head still spinning with everything that’s happened in the past fifteen minutes.

He takes it back. His life isn’t weird. It’s batshit crazy.

-/-

Ariel has been yelling at him in his hotel room for the past fifteen minutes. This is after Liam and Elsa yelled at him for twenty minutes, each, and he’s so damn tired of having to listen to this. He’s aware of the fact that he could have messed up part of his season today, but he still doesn’t regret it. He could have made better choices, yes, but Arthur deserved it. And he’s fine. He’ll probably only have a slight bruise. The only significant damage is the fact that their already frayed relationship that only truly exists because they’re teammates and his wife is friends with Ariel is pretty much destroyed now. That’s fine with him. He doesn’t want anything to do with the asshole.

And he has no idea what he’s going to tell Emma about this. His knuckles have cuts and bruises on them already, his fingers aching when he stretches them out, and if she comes to his room tonight, there’s no way in hell she’s not going to notice.

Maybe he should cancel on her.

He doesn’t want to cancel on her.

He wants to spend time with her and simply be in her company, maybe even get to figure out the subway routes (or should he call them the underground here?) and find a secluded place to go out to dinner. But he’s got to explain his hand, and he’s really not sure how lying is going to go here.

Lying to Emma really isn’t his best idea, so he most likely shouldn’t do it.

“Are you even listening to me, KJ?” Ariel huffs, stopping her pacing and placing her hands on her hips. “You look like you’re not listening.”

“I’m not.” She reaches up to slap the back of his hand, but he grabs her wrist to stop her, putting it back by her side. “I’ve heard all of it before, okay? And I’m going to hear it again. I know, I know, I fucking know. It was dumb, but I couldn’t stand by and listen to that. Will couldn’t either, but he’s got enough brains to know better than to punch someone.”

“That is not a sentence I ever thought you would say.”

“Life is funny like that,” Killian chuckles before falling back against his hotel bed. Whoever is booking their hotel rooms this year obviously has no sense of a budget because he hasn’t had a roommate once. It’s glorious. “A, I have no idea why you care about me so much. I’m such a pain in your ass.”

“Yeah,” Ariel sighs, sitting down next to his shoulder on the bed so that she can look over at him, her red hair framing her face, “you are, but I love you, so I don’t mind too much. And you give me something to focus on other than my idiot husband.”

“Please, you and Eric have one fight a year, and it lasts about five minutes.”

“I’ll have you know that we fought just yesterday over what to have for dinner. It was a real battle. I nearly punched him, but I had enough sense to stop myself.”

His eyes roll, but he can feel the smile stretching across his lips as he twists his head to look at Ariel. “I love you too, by the way. You and Elsa and Anna are pretty much the three sisters I never had. And you’re much nicer to me than Liam ever was.”

“Please, Liam is your hero.”

“Yeah, but when I was eight and he was sixteen, I was not his favorite person in the world. I think you guys would have been much nicer to me.”

Ariel’s lips flatten as she nods her head, sarcasm practically penned across the lines on her forehead. “Sure, sweetie. That’s what would have happened. Are you okay?”

“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” She simply arches her brow. “Oh, yeah, I’m fine. Just a shitty afternoon. As long as I don’t get yelled at anymore, I think I’ll be perfect and ready to go for Addy’s birthday party tomorrow. Thanks for setting that up, by the way. I think you may actually be magic for how you convince people to do your bidding.”

“I know,” she says, a grin plastered on her lips. “I’m pretty much the best. Do you want to come and get dinner with me and Eric?”

“Raincheck on that one?”

“I’m holding you to that this time,” Ariel sighs, patting his shoulder before she rises from the mattress. “Keep putting ice on your hand, and doing your stretches. We’ve got a long season ahead of us, and you are not allowed to mess it up.”

“Understood, love. Have fun at dinner. Feel free not to yell at me tomorrow even though I know that you will.”

Ariel waves him away before picking up her purse and walking out the door while he stays stretched out on his mattress, wondering if he can convince whoever owns this hotel to send this mattress and these sheets to his apartment because it’s glorious. Maybe it’s not really and it’s simply the fact that he’s still jetlagged and has had an extremely long day, but he doubts it.

This is the best comforter in the world.

And he’s never going to move from it.

So, of course, there’s a knock on his hotel door. Of course.

Groaning, he pulls himself up to rise from the bed, the muscles in his backing aching the slightest bit, and steps over to the door, checking the peephole and finding Emma on the other side. He should have known, and honestly, of all of the people seeking him out tonight, she is his favorite.

Until he opens the door, lets her inside, and the first thing that she does is hit him in the chest.

What the hell?

“What the hell?” Emma fumes, echoing his thoughts. “You punched Arthur King today?”

Bloody hell.

Bloody hell? Is he British now? How long has he been using that phrase and hasn’t even realized it? This is what he gets for hanging out with Robin so much.

“Aye,” he sighs as his unbruised hand immediately goes up to scratch behind his ear. She doesn’t look angry, the same soft smile that’s usually painted on her face still there, but there’s fire behind the green of her eyes. “How do you know about that?”

“Belle told me.”

He arches a brow. “Belle?”

“Yeah, I ran into her when I was leaving the stadium, and we got to talking and she starts telling me all about you and Will getting into a fight with Arthur over me. I mean, seriously, Killian. How could you be so dumb to punch him? You’re lucky you didn’t fuck up your arm and that you aren’t getting sanctions against you.”

He should really start putting money on how many times he can be told that in one night. He’s betting at least once more tonight and then seven times tomorrow.

“Swan, I know, okay? I promise you I’ve already had my head chewed off about this enough times. I get it, but he was being an asshole and deserved it. Will confronted him first going on and on about how he was a sexist pig, and then Arthur brought me into it by asking how him talking about wanting to fuck you was any different than me asking you out on a date. Then I told him to stop, which only escalated into him asking you if I’m defending you because I’m fucking you. And obviously, I am, but that’s not why I was defending you. He doesn’t get to say shit like that about anyone, but especially not you.”

He releases a breath when he finishes his ramble, which is really only an abbreviated version of the events, but he’s going to lose his mind if he has to go through it one more time. Seriously. But the way Emma’s mouth keeps opening and closing, the right words obviously not coming to her, has him rethinking this and starting from the beginning. It’s not pretty, but she deserves to know.

“You, Killian Jones,” she laments, stepping closer to him and wrapping her arms around his waist in an unexpected move so that he can smell the vanilla of her perfume, “are an idiot asshole who I’m still very much mad at for messing with your hand like that, but I’m also thankful that you and Will didn’t let someone talk about me like that. I’ve been through so much like that already, and I’m glad I have you guys on my side.”

“You have everyone else in that locker room on your side, love,” he says as her rubs his hands up and down her back and rests his chin against her temple, twisting his head to the side so that he can press his lips into her hair. “Me most of all. Then Will, I’ve discovered today, and everyone else is somewhere in there, rankings improving as long as I’m always at the top.”

“You’re so stupid,” she laughs into his chest, the vibrations of it running through him.

“I’ve gotten that a lot today, but you obviously like me a little bit since I saw you wearing my jersey.”

Emma pulls back from the hug to look up at him, a bit of red painting her cheeks. “So, you saw that, did you?”

“I did. I have an eagle eye for my biggest fan.”

“I like you a lot, but I don’t think that I’m your biggest fan. Your nieces have me beat. I didn’t know tomorrow was Addy’s birthday.”

“Aye,” he smiles, fingers inching up her back and tugging her closer to him, “she is turning six, and Ariel has arranged for her to have a tea party in one of the suites separate from the team suites. You should come with me.”

“Killian.” The way she says his name has all of his hope deflating, and he immediately dips his head down to run his lips across the apple of her cheek while his thumbs rub circles into her lower back. “I can’t. You know that.”

“You can. You don’t have to come as my girlfriend. You can simply come as part of the team. I’ll say I ran into you in the hallway or something and insisted that you come along. Come on,” he begs, finally kissing her lips, lingering a moment too long for it to be chaste, “come with me. It’ll be a fun time, and you can meet my family without any of the pressure of meeting them as my girlfriend.”

“But I will be meeting them as your girlfriend.”

“They don’t know that.”

“I’m not sure how that makes me feel. I know I want to meet your family and for you to meet mine. It was my idea and all, but now that the reality is in front of me, I think I might need some more time.” She pulls back from him, releasing his waist and trailing her fingers along his arms until Emma’s holding his hands, soft thumb tracing over the rough parts of his knuckles as her brows furrow together. She’s inspecting to him, and nerves rile in his stomach until she looks up at him with a sympathetic smile. “Can I think on it tonight at least? I don’t have a present for Addy.”

Killian shrugs. “We can sneak out and go buy her something, or,” he twines their fingers together and tugs her toward the bed, “we can spend a little time in here with you on your back because it really wouldn’t make sense for you to have a present if you weren’t technically planning on coming to the party.” “Watching TV?”

“Sure. We can keep it on while I fuck you with the image of you wearing nothing but my jersey playing in my mind.”

Emma laughs, something loud and boisterous, and he’s never been quite so thankful for the way that she enjoys his flirting. “I mean, that is the most typical athlete thing I’ve ever heard in my life, but we could always make it a reality.”

“Really now?”

“Mhm,” she hums, backing up into the mattress and sitting down, “but only because I liked the way you looked today when you realized I was wearing it. Plus, you defended me and all like a good human being, and I like good human beings.”

And I love you, he wants to say, but doesn’t, biting his tongue while he leans over her, hovering just above her face so that she blinks several times while looking up at him, her bottom lip tugged between her teeth.

“Well, only if you insist.”

#catch me if you can #cs ff #cs fic #captain swan fic #captain swan

[letterboxd]

Quarantine Rentals.

Ten indie films you can rent right now, as recommended by Letterboxd members.

Sure, Scoob!. Yes, Extraction. The Wrong Missy, okay. On the other hand, there are plenty of interesting indie films available for VOD and virtual screenings right now that haven’t necessarily had the benefit of studio backing, big stars, film festivals, red carpets or other ‘normal-circumstances’ coverage to build word-of-mouth.

So, because these are abnormal circumstances, we sent our West Coast editor Dominic Corry on a hunt through your recent reviews to find ten under-seen but enthusiastically received indies that you can rent today.

Thanks to our partnership with JustWatch, you can find availability details on each film’s Letterboxd page—and Dominic has also helpfully provided further links to make it that much easier to support these indie films.

Powerbomb Directed by R. Zachary Shildwachter and B.J. Colangelo

Starring Matt Capiccioni (better known Matt Cross, or M-Dogg 20, or Son of Havoc) as an up-and-coming wrestling star, and Wes Allen as the obsessive fan who kidnaps him, Powerbomb is “The King of Comedy set in the indie wrestling scene, which is a cool fucking concept if nothing else,” according to Dustin Baker. “Luckily, there’s some witty writing and good performances to back up that concept to create something that’s surprisingly a lot of fun.”

Don’t worry if you know nothing about wrestling, writes Justin Nordell: “As someone who has zero reference point for wrestling, this film not only made it accessible but enthralling!”

A guide to where you can watch Powerbomb can be found on the film’s website.

Arkansas Directed by Clark Duke

Quietly ubiquitous comedic actor Clark Duke (Kick-Ass, Hot Tub Time Machine) directed and co-wrote this neo-noir in which he stars alongside such high-profile talent as Vince Vaughn, John Malkovich and Liam Hemsworth. Everyone agrees that the film wears its influences on its sleeve. Chainsaw Massacre “loved nearly every minute of this deliberately paced descendant of Tarantino and the Coen brothers. [But] comparing it to those […] filmmakers does it a disservice though, because, while you can feel their influence, first-time director Clark Duke does have his own distinct style”.

While noting that it marks another interesting performance in Vaughn’s recent emergence as a worthy cinematic lowlife, Tummis would also “like to point out that Liam Hemsworth was great in this”.

Arkansas is available via various digital outlets, as indicated on its official website.

What She Said: The Art of Pauline Kael Directed by Rob Garver

Before the Letterboxd era, film criticism was a much more exclusive realm, and no one critic loomed larger in that realm than The New Yorker’s Pauline Kael—so iconic that true cineastes of her time referred to her simply by her first name. So it behooves you, good Letterboxd member, to familiarize yourself with this master of the form via this new documentary.

In a review that feels like it could apply to any number of Letterboxd members, kmarus says “From what I’ve encountered of her criticism, Kael and I disagree on a lot of things, but one thing that is readily apparent to anyone who reads her writing is that she genuinely cares about movies”.

Letterboxd’s London correspondent (and professional critic) Ella Kemp felt personally validated watching the film. “It’s magic, she’s magic, this is why we needed her and why we always need movies, and why I want to keep talking about them. It’s nice if you read me, if you like me or if you agree with me—but even if you don’t, I know I’ll be sticking around for a while anyway. I’m nowhere near done yet.”

You can rent the film here.

Slay The Dragon Directed by Barak Goodman and Chris Durrance

The insidious and nebulous practice of gerrymandering is the focus of this acclaimed documentary. As member Andrew Chrzanowski ominously intones, the film is “never more timely than right here and right now” and “demands you to watch, so you may witness in a comprehensive and detailed way the metastasis of the most malignant cancer on our democracy: gerrymandered districts and redrawn borders by Republicans, especially after the 2010 elections”.

Guyatthemovies says the film “does a phenomenal job of taking a topic that may seem confusing for most who are not familiar and breaking it down to simplistic terms, explaining the impact of gerrymandering [through] well-known examples” and that “this is a must-watch for anyone concerned about the state of politics today”.

You can support your favorite theater by renting the film here.

Judy & Punch Directed by Mirrah Foulkes

Mia Wasikovska and Damon Herriman, two of the more interesting Australian actors working in film today, and each possessed of a fantastically cinematic face, star in this one-of-a-kind film as a couple operating a marionette show in a town about to bubble over with tension. Like the classic puppet characters that title the film, they come to blows.

The film is the feature-directing debut of Aussie actor and filmmaker Mirrah Foulkes, and Letterboxd member CJ Johnson says she “announces herself as a feature auteur of serious talent and limitless potential with […] a film whose great artfulness is only outdone by its sheer, breath-taking originality”.

Jess V.K. warns us to “go into this film with no expectations, because whatever you were expecting is not what you will see”.

Rent the film here.

On A Magical Night Directed by Christophe Honoré

This French comedy (of sorts) presents a fresh perspective on a very French activity: infidelity. It begins with a woman, Maria (Chiara Mastroianni, daughter of Italian-French acting royalty Marcello Mastroanni and Catherine Deneuve) deciding to leave her husband, and taking up residence across the street where she can observe him.

As Allison M. explains, “like a modernized version of A Christmas Carol, spirits living and dead come to haunt Maria to help her make a decision about whether or not she should return to her husband. It is complete with a phantom baby, reference to a past threesome, and kissing cousins”.

The film caused Gmacauley to ruminate: “Have you ever thought to yourself that when you get old you’d like to travel to the past and sleep with your significant other while they’re young again? Well now I have.”

Watch it here; and also seek out Nicolas Bedos’ marital fantasy romp, La Belle Époque.

The Assistant Directed by Kitty Green

This austere take on the #MeToo era stars Ozark breakout Julia Garner as a bottom-rung assistant to a never-seen, New York-based film producer clearly modeled on Harvey Weinstein. Through one long workday, we are witness to the manipulative practices that enable such a figure, without ever landing on a single incident that she can cite as tangible proof of his behavior, which helps detail the impossibility of her—and countless others’—situation.

While the film’s understated style has thrown some viewers off, that’s entirely the point according to Ryne Walley, who says it “aims true with unwavering confidence. The calculated pace and concise nature of The Assistant hides very little, echoing the countless cases of abuse and depravity that’ve been disclosed… an agonizingly taut feat of filmmaking… Your heart sinks with each passing hour”.

“So quietly powerful, this is a female film through and through. Gut wrenching in the simplest way,” writes Letterboxd member Katie.

Ella Kemp interviewed Green about The Assistant for Letterboxd. The film’s official website lists various VOD options.

Capital in the Twenty-First Century Directed by Justin Pemberton

French economist Thomas Piketty’s 2013 book about income equality forms the basis of this documentary, which takes on a new pertinence in the coronavirus era.

“It’s a sobering trip,” says Joey Jepson. “As if Covid-19 wasn’t enough to send you into a deep depression, Capital in the Twenty-First Century presents a thesis that seems to indicate that if we don’t course correct, we will see a further divide and evaporation of the middle-class.”

Michael agrees: “Very clearly and lucidly explains why we’re fucked if we don’t start regulating capital.” Eep.

Rent the film here.

Spaceship Earth Directed by Matt Wolf

The 1991 biosphere experiment—in which a group of people sealed themselves off from the world (hey!) to investigate human self-sustainability—is the subject of this documentary, which, like Capital in the Twenty-First Century, also hits a little different in the current moment.

Kellyabailey is on board: “I’m fuckin inspired, man. I wanna see what I’m capable of and finally start that commune I’ve been dreaming up.”

Smooz was impressed with how the film didn’t make fun of its subjects: “It’s rare for a documentarian […] dealing with kooks to produce a movie with any sort of empathy. This movie takes the kooks involved in one of the kookiest, most ridiculed projects in recent decades and honestly shows their successes, visionary moments, shortcomings, and failures while resisting the urge to dunk on them and give them swirlies.”

Letterboxd editor-in-chief Gemma Gracewood spoke to Wolf about his film—and what movies he’d choose to take with into a biosphere—in this interview. Rent the movie here.

Aren’t You Happy Directed by Susanne Heinrich

Those in the mood for something different might do well to check out this aesthetically bold German film—think Wes Anderson meets The Love Witch meets the movie Robert De Niro takes Cybill Shepherd to see on their ‘date’ in Taxi Driver—following a young woman named Mädchen (Marie Rathscheck) through various strange encounters.

Arvid Schmiedehausen says it “might be the most artistic film I have ever watched. It is highly ambitious in its attempts to deconstruct society and western values through fourteen episodes, with each being a persiflage on one unique aspect of it”. [We had to look up “persiflage” too.]

Ian A. Chapman writes that “not in anyway adhering to convention, Aren’t You Happy melancholically meanders through rendezvous allowing time for delicious dialogue. Visually pleasing, the colour choices neatly frame the scenes and set the tones allowing for a shorthand into the vibe”.

Rent the movie here.

Related content

Our list of art house films screening online now.

#indie film #independent film #indie films to rent #vod #streaming #virtual screening #virtual release #quarantine films #letterboxd #letterboxd recommendations #spaceship earth #the assistant #kitty green #vince vaughn

[wingsporkhalo]

He’s Mine: A BakuDeku Fic Spork- Chapter 2

Here I am with chapter 2 of this mess!! For those of you who are new, I read a terrible My Hero Academia fanfiction and made funny commentary on it with some good buddies. Chapter 1 is here! https://wingsporkhalo.tumblr.com/post/190957730961/hes-mine-a-bakudeku-fic-spork-chapter-1

Support me on Patreon! I am poor!! https://www.patreon.com/WingSongHalo And check out my YouTube channel, where you can see video sporks!! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCgTMFf7W6SyWoZdpqY9ZdPw/

Last time, the story started in the middle of an inexplicable fight, Izuku gave Shoto his phone number and had multiple houses, and Katsuki told Izuku he doesn’t want Izuku to call anyone by their first name but him! Because being controlling is romantic, right?? (Sarcasm.)

In today’s chapter, Katsuki attempts to confess his “love,” Izuku is forced to dress as a girl, Shoto kidnaps Izuku, I rant about people uke-fying my favorite characters, and Kirishima offers some terrible advice!

Special thanks to my dear friends @the-wizard-l​, @kittykatz009​, @satsuneade​, and Phos for co-commentating!

Without further ado, let’s move ahead to Chapter 2!

My friend Phos: It’s reviewing the same stuff!!! What?? Me: but Phos!! This time it's in a different Point of View, though you'd never know that from the lack of detail!!

Um what am I doing here .

[sigh] I ask myself that every day, sonny

Why dose? Uh, because it keeps you from taking too much medication?

Why dose my chest feel weird when I see deku with half'n'half.

Uhhh... maybe you know he's lactose intolerant and you're concerned for him as a friend? ....naaahhh

Phos: “Damed nerd” Me: I mean, from what i know of Bakugou's character, he always instantly regrets talking to Izuku Why would he be stuttering in his own head??! Also, what the fuck is damhed? Is it like being a shithead, but less profane?? Disided. Uhhhh... I guess that's when... something has two sides? I guess??

After I payed for the thing I wanted,

God this detail!! I'm so moved!!

Why was Izuku just running around? Was he late? I thought you were 10 minutes early?

I catched up to him

Sure. With your umbrella? Were you using it to travel like fucking Mary Poppins??

“Ahh” he said falling on the wet ground

I love how unemotional that is.

"DEKU HEAR" --the sound of me being completely out of character? Oh yes. I hear it

Wh--? What bottom of his uniform was he grabbing? I??? I hope you mean like the edge of the blazer?? My friend Jaz: Bottom of his shoes Phos: Bottom of the uniform might mean bottom of the pant leg— Oh Me: I mean, valid interpretations all of them, but it really sounds like he's grabbing ass if you just say "the bottom of his uniform" because that's... where the bottom is... moving on.

I don't get it. Has Bakugou supposedly found Izuku's stare cute this whole time, or is this a recent thing? It's so outside the realm of possibility that it's not computing

We walked to school together.

Oh my, how exciting! I wondered what was going to happen next!! And you told it so efficiently, with as few words as possible! Bravo!!

So like, WERE you getting closer or did it just FEEL like you were?

I feel like if their faces ever touched, reality would just collapse in on itself because the laws of nature would be violated

(either that or it would have to be a "one of them literally fell from a great distance onto the other one" situation)

(Which I guess isn't too far fetched since they get thrown around a lot)

Again the damh nerd is here.

Did I say something wrong?

SINCE WHEN HAVE YOU EVER CARED???

Ohhhhkay I'm just. So confused. WHY is Bakugou suddenly aware of his "feelings," WHY is he suddenly so much nicer, and WHY is he just deciding all of a sudden to confess his love?? That's the kind of thing you WRESTLE with, if you accidentally fall in love with the dude you've hated for like 11 of your 15 years of life!! My friend Wiz, evidently affected by the reality-warping powers of this fic: jhwbebhjfewjhbwfjh

Uh why did he have to come at a time like this.

B... because the bell is going to ring?...

Wow, I wish I could communicate entire sentences with just my face. Seems like a useful talent. Maybe that guy in class 1-B with the speech bubble for a head would be best at that

"Kacchan here" Why yes, he is here. Not sure why the sudden caveman-speak, though

Then half'n'half went of with my deku

[sits there staring at nothing for 5 seconds] [shakes self] Sorry I was just reeling at the sheer ridiculousness of everything about that sentence

I felt kind of bad leaving kacchan behind.

Then it just transitions to the next scene because fuck internal monologue I guess Jaz: When did he become Your Deku? Me: THEIR TEACHER NEVER SHOWED UP??? BITCH WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO AIZAWA??? Also, wouldn't it naturally fall to Iida to take over and decide their next course of action, as class rep? Why are the girls all hijacking the class??? Jaz: They hogtied Iida, of course Me: They're putting their names on a stick... oh god... tHEY'RE ORGANIZING A DEATH TOURNAMENT "Deku come with me" "I'd love to but that's not the pairing of this fic" Jaz: Dhdududidifhf

I love how Izuku has no agency in this fic; he just goes with whoever and does whatever, helpless against the whims of those around him. And by love, I mean hate. I fucking hate that.

Uh *sigh*

Wow that's a mood. Jaz: Wtf is even going on Me: lskjdlkksjdf Not that Izuku wouldn't dress up as a girl if someone told him to, but I think he'd usually at least like a reason for it "Izuku the All Might Cheer Squad is missing a member; could you sub in?" "[throws everything off his desk and stands up at once] I've been waiting for this moment" My friend Satsu, just arriving: Finally caught up and I'm CACKLING Me: Somebody get Ochaco to Recovery Girl!! She's taken a blow to the face and there is BLEEDING aH THANK U SATSU <3 Satsu: HI MOM, ((note: my server calls me Mom. LOL)) lol this is so bad 😂 😂 Wiz: I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IS EVEN HAPPENING HERE JHBDJBH Me: Honestly, I think Izuku would be dreadfully embarrassed if everyone stared at him no matter WHAT he was wearing Satsu: Yeah but like, why uraraka suddenly dressed him like that??? What is the thinking process that that would be okay in the school omg Me: “Why would you do this to me uraraka-san“ Wiz: I’m crying Me: "Look, it was in my contract that I had to appear in 50 badfics a week. I'm sorry, Deku" "[hangs his head] No that's fair"

Satsu, didn't you know?? This is just what happens when the teacher doesn't show up Satsu: Aw damn, if I knew ;-;

Wiz: I am. So confused wjhbfe Satsu: They all ran of Me: he stoped, but I can't.

Then I ran of

It was a run of girlishness and embarrassment, I'm guessing. Did they all say the slashes, or? Jaz: Did Todoroki just kidnap Deku? Wiz: These things happen Satsu: Oh dear, the last sentence My eyes Me:

Izuku ran of

--Shame and frilliness--

Mabey we went to far

"Sorry, I can't go with you this weekend. Mah bae and I are going to far." "To where?" "Far. It's this restaurant across town" Wiz: jhwbewehbj Me: What the--why was Izuku running for his life? WHAT DID HE DO Shoto: [pushes Izuku] Izuku: thank you! Shoto: uh... s-sure... should I be concerned that you just thanked me for shoving you Izuku: Probably! Wiz: MOOD Satsu: Kdbdkdbfkjf Me: What the--why's Shoto rubbing Izuku's head? Is it a good luck ritual or has Izuku turned into a puppy? Wait, no, he still has hands. I'M CONFUSED Phos: I still don’t understand the dress and wig.Well, girls uniform. Satsu: You’re not alone with that lol Me: Look, sometimes ya see an adorable messy-haired befreckled shonen protagonist and ur just overwhelmed with the desire to see him in drag....... I guess? Phos: I mean Yeah that sounds exactly like what this fic is doing Me: It sounds to me like they wanted to write moments where Shoto and Katsuki would get to interact with Izuku while he's a delicate, soft little maiden [rolls eyes] Wiz: :’)) Me: STOP UKE-FYING MY IZUKU, YOU FETISHIST Satsu: They always do that to my dear main characters :( Me: Me pulling these badfic authors up by their collar: listen here you yaoi sluts... my son Izuku is more manly than 90 other shonen protagonists put together... Jaz: Omggggg WING Phos: "yaoi sluts" I will never have a chance to use that and man I’m upset about that Satsu: Heck yeah! Me: LSJKFLKSDJ PHOS Satsu: MOOD Phos: I’m not in a lot of fandoms where yaoi is the norm in badfic! Me: Really? It kind of seems like it's the norm in every fandom nowadays. Look I love a lot of slash pairings, but yaoi I have a problem with. Yaoi is fetishization, yaoi is semes and ukes and one of them has to be "the girl" essentially and it's gross Phos: Agreed! Me: ANYWHO [steps off my soapbox] Wiz, a bit behind on the messages: YAOI SLUTS JHBFJHF

No body saw him, but several pairs of eyes did. Three of them were Shoji's. Wiz: Wing I love you Me:

Something told me he went out side

Was the something lazy writing? I LOVE U TOO WIZ <3 <3 <3 Satsu: It's cracking me uo that it says "Bakago P. O. V" Me: Does... does this person honestly think that's how you spell "damn"? I... wh? The kinds of mistakes this person is making are not really things I see from people who speak English as a second language--tenses are more or less usually correct, etc--so I'm just. How. How do you get it wrong that many times

"Ahh" I heard someone screaming

Really? Cuz when you write it like that it looks more like what you'd say while sinking into a hot bath after a long day. Satsu: Wait, didn't Todoroki kidnap him? Where did he go? Phos: He’s been consumed by the love triangle void Satsu: He just vanished lol Me: Yeah he was like "finally, my Love Interest™️ is in drag, so I must make the most of this and Romance him" and fucked the hell off dragging poor Izuku with him Satsu: LMAO PHOS Me: SLAKFJDLKJ PHOS Phos: bows Thank you Me:

It was Deku being chased by boys

The Izuku Midoriya tag on pixiv, basically

I picked up deku and put him over my shoulder.

This is the second BakuDeku fic I've seen where Bakugou throws Izuku over his shoulder like a goddamn bag of potatoes and it's portrayed as Romantic. Wiz: w h y Satsu: I'm still wondering, is this supposed to be BakuDeku or TodoDeku? Or both????? Phos: Both, I think Me: I think it’s both, yeah Satsu: Aw, dang. My poor baby. :( Phos: I’d bet real money this doesn’t end properly, like it’s not finished Me: yeah the story is technically called "he's Mine! (tododeku kacdeku) (boku no hero academia)" Satsu: Kfbdkfjf jf Wiz: Oh joy Me: which, like, first off, who the FUCK calls it Kacdeku? I'm pretty sure I heard my cat say that while throwing up once Wiz: gfthghuji Phos: Adobe (That was a corrected keysmash) Satsu: I was about to say about kacdeku veing a very weird ship name lol Ah fuck, I always end up changing one letter or eating a whole word Me: "ADOBE" IS THE BEST KEYSMASH LSKJDKFSL mkay SO I don't think Bakugou would literally kill those boys, but he would definitely threaten it Also, how is Izuku supposed to get changed? Did he bring his other clothes with him??

Phos: BOLD ITALIC AUTHORS NOTE Wiz: jhbjhbjhk Me: I... guess he had his uniform? ALSO YES, ONE OF MY FAVORITES, DEFS A SQUARE ON MY BADFIC BINGO Phos:

Or ... fuck him

Wow I hate this Me: I do not remember Bakugou ever looking like a lost cat, nor do I think a lost cat is a very good descriptor because cats just kinda hide or come up to people and yell when they're lost. ...Actually that second one does describe Bakugou; never mind. Katsukitty "ALL THEM BOYS" SHEEEEE-OOOT! IZUKU DONE GOT HIMSELF A HUMDINGER OF A SOUTHERN ACCENT, NOW, AHYUH-HYUH!!! I walked on a head? Wow, that takes talent. Most people use their feet but I guess if you wanna be Extra

I all ways want to force him

I mean, there are a lot of ways; do you really have to want all of them?

to force him agents a wall

Whoa, what? Where did these agents come from?? Are they investigating Todoroki's sudden disappearance?? Satsu: In which universe Bakugo is nicer with Deku more than with Kirishima Me:

and kiss him passionately

jfc. I just... hhhh. No.

Or... fuck him

Yeah that's about right. Katsuki: [thinks of Deku] well, fuck him :\ Satsu: LMAO LFBFKFHFKFB Phos: Scbsbsfddb Me: Also, Satsu, you summoned my favorite rocky cinnamon roll

Satsu: Also I don't remember what part of season 3 are you refering to dear author lol JUST, PLEASE STOP WITH THE DAMH ALREADY Phos: What even is that page.... Me: So I guess I should be surprised that Kirishima is just suddenly here, but considering he seems to follow Bakugou everywhere, I'm not.

"I've seen you with midoria and I thought I could help"

What's midoria? Is it a medical condition? "Man, I came down with a nasty case of midoria. I was in the bathroom like seven times last night" If that's the case, Kirishima could help by just giving him some Pepto. Satsu: Kdbejqhevjdvfjd Wiz: pfffft Me:

"Well for one change your..."

Mind? Clothes? Tires once every four years or 10,000 miles? Satsu: Your brain cells!??? Me:

"well be less angry and more happy with him"

WOW!! STARTLINGLY ASTUTE ADVICE!! IF ONLY SOMEONE COULD HAVE PINPOINTED BEFORE WHY THEIR RELATIONSHIP IS SO STRAINED!! YOU DOIN' THE LORD'S WORK, AUTHOR!! Phos: Adsvads Me:

"Are you telling me to change who I am!!"

"Well... yeah, kinda. I mean, I love ya, bro, but your attitude kinda sucks." "........Okay, fair"

"Unless you want him to be with todoroki!?"

Uhhh, does what Izuku wants factor into this at ALL, or...? Also, sure, if someone doesn't like you, just change who you are! Works every time, at least until you forget which version of yourself you were using with each person!! Wiz: yaaaaaaaaayyyy Me:

Damh him

Uhhh... okay. [points to self] Wing, me.

"Fine I'll change but only when I'm around deku!"

Sure! Sounds like the basis of a healthy relationship! (: The last decade of abuse doesn't matter!! Wiz: :')))))

===========================================================

AND THAT IS ALL FOR CHAPTER 2! Next time, Shoto makes terrible jokes and lies to Izuku’s mother, Izuku and Shoto go on a date, and our helpless damsel protagonist gets attacked by a villain!! Next post will be up very soon! Thanks for reading <33333

#badfic #bad fanfiction #wingsporkhalo #hes mine #my hero academia #bnha #fanfiction spork

[hvmanity]

      hey ! have you seen EMBERLYN CROSS (CISFEMALE) around london ? people say that SHE looks a lot like JESSICA CHASTAIN but i don’t know… i just can’t see it. apparently the FORTY year old HUMANITARIAN / EDUCATION CONSULTANT is known to be GENEROUS and WARM but others have said that they’ve known them to be AN ESCAPIST and OUTSPOKEN. i’ll be looking forward to bumping into the around the city !

      howdy folks ! i’m medusa & i’ll be playin’ yer local southern belle, emberlyn. she’s a mix of a few characters i’ve played, so pls bear w/ me as i figure her out ! that being said, i can’t wait to interact w/ all of your kiddos <3

biography (tw death, depression):

emberlyn cross grows up on a ranch in the middle of gosh dang nowhere, usa. a small, southern town where everyone practically knows everyone. 

she’s an only child and it shows. since she was little, the spunky redhead was used to getting her way with a please and thank you. a sneaky thing behind a charming personality and a golden heart. 

it’s in her teens that tragedy strikes. her pop gets into an accident with a tractor and he doesn’t make it out of the hospital. emberlyn learned everything from the good, hard-working man and now she feels like she’s learned nothing at all. 

her mother makes things work somehow, and emberlyn thinks she’s an angel in disguise. but it’s hard. bills pile up. the town helps where they can. 

it’s emberlyn’s boyfriend that gets the sadness. the depression. the haunting nightmares. he takes it all and he gives her a safe haven to turn to. and she loves him more than anything in the world. 

but when she finds out she’s pregnant at 17, things take a turn. she can’t handle a baby. she can barely handle herself. and with her father gone, the idea of being a parent terrifies her. she can’t make things work like her dear mama. 

so they decide to give the baby up for adoption. it’s an agreed deal. she ends up having the baby right after graduation, and after she’s turned 18. 

they give the baby over. it weighs heavily on emberlyn. so much so that she breaks up w/ her boyfriend and moves out of town that very week, with little goodbye.

emberlyn travels after that. first for university then going from one place to the next. doing odd jobs and going into humanitarian work. she excels at it. it’s her calling. 

she ends up interning at unicef, and it doesn’t take long until she’s established herself. she’s an educator, first. and then she’s an education consultant - running plans and programs for international schools in a multitude of countries. it’s a dream job. she feels she’s making an impact; she feels closer to home. 

which is funny, because home’s now calling her back. but not in the states. in london, of all places. and by her kid’s adoptive mother, of all people. who apparently has just lost her husband, emberlyn’s old boyfriend. 

he didn’t keep his end of the promise. he raised their kid without telling her. 

while furious with the thought, she’s grieving over her old lover. and anxious to meet her daughter (who has no idea she even exists). and wondering why on earth the other mother would even want her around. 

nevertheless, emberlyn arrives in london and prepares to have her life uprooted a second time. 

details:

she has a southern accent. it’s less okie accent and more southern belle, but she definitely can switch between the two when she’s being more rowdy/playful. 

has a soft, angelic voice. definitely sings like she’s made for it. 

is bisexual, biromantic. known since high school. has dated both men and women.

was closer to her dad growing up. he taught her the ‘manly’ things. fishing, hunting, how to build things, how to start a fire, how to change tires, etc. 

cannot cook worth a darn, but loves to bake. has short hair to her shoulders.

is currently working at unicef’s london headquarters while here. has taken up more of a secretary job, and assisting local schools in handling exchange students’ education. 

wanted connections: 

her kid: will go on main!

her kid’s adoptive mother: will go on main!

her best friend: they’ve known each other for years now. whether it’s from her uni days, her work in unicef, her travels, etc. this is someone she considers family.  

people her ex boyfriend/father of her kid knew: he would have recently died. they’re likely protective of her kid and wanting to make sure emberlyn doesn’t come and make matters worse. 

childhood faces: could have been friends or enemies or people her family knew, etc. these folks would have to be from a small, southern town in the states. which state doesn’t matter and is left open!

roommate/host/etc: basically, this person is housing her for the unforeseeable future. she put out an ad looking for a room/etc, and they answered. or maybe they put out an ad and she did.

exes: can be men or women, and around her age. probably going to stick to just two for now! maybe things ended bitterly and she’d hate to see them. maybe she’d be glad to have someone who knew her so well around. 

flings/one night stands: she has a habit of sleeping around because of stress or needing validation / intimacy to comfort her. without wanting the seriousness of a relationship to add onto the former thing. 

london tour guide: a new friend who’s showing her around the city. she’s been here before but generally in passing, so this is someone showing her the local life.

unrequited crushes: one on her and one she has on someone else. 

friends: whether old or new. people she can call up to go to a pub with her, go to brunch with, go to a park with, etc. or even just stay at home and binge netflix with. 

people she’s met in her travels: could be friends, enemies, flings, etc. they couldn’t kept in contact after they met or fell out of contact. 

enemies/rivals/etc: the people she’d be at odds with, for whatever reason. can definitely think up ideas! would love at least two or three. 

and anything else! just hmu if you’ve an idea bc i’m horrid at plotting lol

ps. inspired by the film, after the wedding.

#ldnintro

[carmenlire]

Higher than the Big Trees Ch. 8

read on ao3

Humble Pride: The Duality of Alec Lightwood Out Magazine Feature, June 2018 Article by Andrew Bronheimer Photos by Connor Murphy

Alec Lightwood. Heartthrob to millions, artist extraordinaire, last year’s Paris Fashion Week surprise when he walked down the Armani runway in a truly delectable teal suit with suitably dramatic eye makeup. Lightwood’s been the talk of the town for over a decade now. He released his very first song a week before he turned sixteen and the rest, as they say, is history.

Lightwood’s illustrious career has spanned controversy and continents and just recently has earned him the title Entertainer of the Year just a few months ago-- for the third time. For those that don’t know, Alec writes all of his songs and can play a variety of instruments including the guitar, piano, drums, and the clarinet.

Alec has just wrapped up his latest world tour. 128 tour dates, over a million tickets sold, and an estimated 700 million dollars in revenue resulted in a sold-out tour for a triple platinum album that puts this superstar at the top of his game.

We don’t see him falling anytime soon.

Because I’m obsessive about making a good impression to my guests, I showed up to the little cafe we had agreed to meet up at half an hour early. It gives me time to review my notes and take a breath, opening my mind for first impressions-- both good and bad.

The cafe in question is cute. It’s full of bright colors-- splashes of crimson mixed with ribbons of turquoise gives the place a kitschy, bohemian air. The pastry display at the front of the shop is beautiful with fluffy scones and gigantic cupcakes covered with a mountain of frosting.

It’s turning towards evening and the golden light adds to the summer ambiance. I was just debating between a piece of raspberry swirl pound cake or triple chocolate muffin when the little bell above the door chimed and in walked the man of the hour.

Alec Lightwood is even more stunning in person, dear readers. He’s sporting a five o’clock shadow that makes his face a little more rugged and his patrician features look carved from marble. He’s wearing slim fit pants in an alluring olive green with the bottoms rolled up to show surprisingly delicate ankles for such a tall man.

His navy sweater is just right, offering a lovely contrast from the pants and working well with his coloring.

Lightwood slips his sunglasses off and tucks then into the neck of his sweater. His eyes sweep across the surprisingly empty eatery before landing on me. Immediately, I’m a little intimidated. Razor sharp hazel eyes that show a surprising intelligence and his giraffe-like height are a little overwhelming when you’re a foot shorter and not expecting such attention.

In the next moment, Alec smiles and it’s a warm, engaging thing that instantly makes everything more comfortable.

We chat for a few minutes before deciding to order. Alec orders a coffee drink that is at least ninety-five percent sugar-- a concoction with caramel, mocha and whipped cream. We both choose a few pastries-- Alec goes for the dark chocolate scone-- and we settle in to our little table. He’s patient as I set my recorder up and seems content to happily munch on his baked good, giving the impression that he’s not bothered that I’m a little scattered today, of all days.

Then we begin.

Out: So, Alec, welcome back home. How does it feel?

Alec: (Laughs). Thanks, man. It feels great. I’m a New Yorker born and bred and while I love traveling nothing quite beats being home and taking that first subway ride after a while abroad.

O: You just wrapped up your latest sold-out tour. How did it compare to previous tours?

A: This tour was definitely the biggest on any scale, whether it was tickets sold, venue capacities, or effort. The crew was amazing every night, putting together sets and making sure that everything went off without a hitch. And the fans, well, they just continue to blow me away. Their enthusiasm is unmatched. While grueling-- it’s the longest tour I’ve ever done and covered the most distance-- it was indescribably brilliant. I had the time of my life and I hope everyone else feels the same.

O: World tour, check. What’s next for you, Lightwood?

A: That’s the million dollar question. I have a few months before I start recording my next album. I plan to take this summer and write most of the material for that record. Plus, I want to enjoy some time off. It’s been a year since I was last in New York and I want to get reacquainted with the city and with my family.

O: So, both work and play?

A: Yeah, I guess so. There’s always that push to think ahead in terms of my career-- what’s the next step, where can I go from here. I’ll definitely be working this summer. I have a few writing sessions lined up with artists I really admire and I’m excited to see what emerges from them. An Arrow in the Dark was a huge phase of that career, though, and coming off that album cycle kind of just leaves me with a desire to sleep for a century (laughs). I’m using this time to recharge and make my seventh album the best I can, the best I’ve ever done.

O: Can you tease anything from the next album?

A: I think this album might surprise the fans a little. I’ve been at this for over a decade. I want to stretch my legs and experiment a little. I don’t know what will make it on the record, but I need to change things up or I’ll get stale and that’s the worst thing for an artist to become.

O: So, you’re doing something different? We should prepare ourselves for something a little out of the box when we think of Alec Lightwood?

A: I guess that’s a takeaway. I just want the fans to go into things with an open mind. I’ve lived a lot in the past two years and those experiences will probably show up in my next album. I’m looking for new shit, man. I don’t want to put any parameters on my art-- who knows what’s going to come out.

O: Speaking of living a lot, you’ve been linked to several men, including Emmy-winning Actor Jason Desker. Can I ask if anything is going on there?

A: Sure, you can ask. Doesn’t mean I’ll answer. But, truthfully, there’s not much to say. Jason and I met up at an after-party and the next day rumors were swirling around about the two of us. I can tell you, 100 percent truth, that I am single and unattached. I’m not in a relationship and I haven’t been in one for years.

O: But what about all of the rumors?

A: They’re just that. Rumors. False gossip and idle speculation.

O: No one’s caught your eye, then?

A: No.

O: Okay, then. There’s the truth straight from your lips. Now, Alec, you’ve been out since almost the beginning of your career, which began when you were a junior in high school. What can you share about your own experiences coming out during such a turbulent time?

A: I’ve known I was gay since I was a little kid. Absolutely no doubt about it. It took me years to learn the name for what I felt and even longer to reconcile that part of me with everyone else’s expectations. When my family asked if there was anyone special I had me eye on, I’d shrug and deny anything, offering that school and sports were taking all of my focus. My siblings knew everything wasn’t what it seemed, but they let me have that shield to hide behind until I was ready to admit to the world that I wasn’t straight.

At the very start of my career, there was a lot of contention between a lot of parties on what my image should be. I kept quiet for months and was well into my senior year of high school when I decided to make my public move. I was the captain of the soccer team and had been going out with one of my teammates for a few months.

I was just fed up with it all. I had a hit song on the radio and the whole damn school knew about the two of us-- it was almost an open secret. The guy at the time was in the closet but ready to come out and I was standing in his way. So, the day we won the state tournament, I kissed him in front of a few thousand people out on the field. IT was an incredible high and I don't think either of us could believe what I'd just done.

Shit was a little crazy after that. The media took to the story like a house on fire and things at school and home were a little hectic for awhile. But I felt a lot of relief and everything was worth it in the end.

O: That’s quite a story.

A: (Laughs). Yeah. It was dramatic as hell and I caught a lot of heat for it, but I was just tired, you know? I was a month from graduation and planning to go on tour right after that and it was almost like, it was now or never. So, I chose now. The moment I did it was a cathartic release. All that weight just dropped from my shoulders. That isn’t to say that things were smooth sailing, because like I said there were a lot of parties that were unhappy with me and my irrevocable decision. My coming out wasn't just for my own mental health or peace of mind-- it was a deliberate business decision that I knew would impact my career from the second I went through with it, but I haven’t regretted anything. If sharing the absolute terror and relief I felt helps anyone, then I have no problem talking about my story.

O: You have a lot of fans and are a role model to many of them, especially those in our community. Do you have any advice for them?

A: I’d say, just share your truth. That sounds like such after school special bullshit but it’s true. Even if you are straight or cis, you can still be going through things that are difficult to handle or acknowledge. Once you start living your best life, is when you start really living. There will be hate and ignorance and all that bad stuff but being free and unapologetic about it is a powerful balm to any insults or accusations that might get hurled your way. Remember, there’s nothing wrong with what you feel. You’re valid and it’s going to be okay.

O: Wise words, Alec. Now that you’ve been out for almost a decade, can you share your ideal man? Give some of us some hope (laughs).

A: I don’t really have a type, man. I like intelligence and wit and kindness. I’m pretty basic that way. I can’t explain what catches my eye because it seems to change every time. I’ve been with guys who were vastly different, from a broker in the London Stock Exchange to a drummer in a Brazilian metal band. I don’t limit myself.

O: So no teasers on who we might next see you with?

A: Not really. All I can offer right now is that I’m looking for someone who sees beyond Alec Lightwood in all capital letters. I’m just a guy and when I do fall for someone it’s going to be real. Who knows when that will happen but I’m in no rush. I have a lot on my plate and things will happen when they’re meant to.

O: With that last statement, let’s end things with a fun tidbit. What’s the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened on tour?

A: Embarrassing, huh? That’s certainly a different direction. There was that time in Dublin that I ripped my pants and my cartoon underwear showed for almost the entire concert and I didn’t know. But, I think I’d have to say that the most embarrassing thing that ever happened on stage was when I fell. It was an open arena and it was raining. Not too hard, but enough to make things slippery. I was in the middle of the dramatic chorus when I slipped like a cartoon on a banana peel. Everything was silent for a moment before I got my breath and stood up. By ass hurt like hell but I was only halfway through the set. I could feel my blush for the rest of the concert. It was awful.

O: And on that note, thank you Alec for agreeing to talk with Out Magazine.

We talked for a few more minutes, informally, before I had to leave for my next appointment. Alec was ushered by a photographer right after I left for the spread you can see in the following pages.

Lightwood is a powerhouse. He has the voice of a generation and a kind heart. He’s self deprecating and one doesn’t get the impression that he’s just another stuck-up celebrity out of touch with the average person. By all accounts, his fans are rabid over him and it’s not hard to see why. He’s a professional at all costs and is always engaging with fans on social media. With over eighty million followers on Twitter and Instagram, it’s undeniable that Alec has built an admirable foundation of support.

Watching behind the scenes videos and fan blogs, it’s obvious that there’s a rapport between Alec and his fans that not every artist is fortunate enough to have-- or cares enough to curate. There’s respect and love from both sides.

Alec Lightwood isn’t just a pretty face. He works as hard as his discography and grueling schedule indicates. The day we had the interview, Alec had a meeting with his record company board and met with the people at ABC for his Good Morning America appearance. His day didn’t end until almost dawn, as the photoshoot took hours after our sparse dinner. But Lightwood didn’t complain. A trooper, he seemed genuinely interested in our conversation and from what the photographer and wardrobe team told me, he took direction well and had fun with the shoot-- even though he had been up for almost twenty four hours at that point.

Alec Lightwood is an enigmatic man. He guards his life zealously. Everyone sees him stumbling out of clubs with a different guy on his arm every week. Everyone has seen his interviews and fans catch glimpses of the man behind the scenes, but that’s all they are. Brief looks into the private life of America’s favorite celebrity.

It makes one wonder about what lies beneath the surface. From our conversation, Alec had a wit and bluntness that’s admirable in the upper echelons of America’s darlings. He has a brother that owns an award-winning gym in Brooklyn with a mile-long waiting list and a sister that’s featured on countless magazine covers herself-- Isabelle Lightwood is set to appear in the Victoria’s Secret show in the fall and has racked up quite a following of her own.

This family is determined and, above all, generous. It’s been a pleasure watching Lightwood grow from the somewhat awkward teen to the self-assured man he is now, comfortable with his fame and the scrutiny of millions. This is the second time Lightwood has graced our Magazine’s cover and it’s always a delight. I, and the team at Out Magazine, wish Alec Lightwood all the luck on his next album. We can’t wait to hear it!

An Arrow in the dark, Lightwood’s sixth studio album and latest release, is out now and can be found online and in-store at a variety of merchants. See below for more details.

At the time of press, Chocolate Raspberry, his latest single, had sold over five million copies and was topping the charts at No. 1.

Word on the street has it that fans can expect another single to drop soon-- the acoustic and dark-toned Empty Hearts.

#httbt #my writing #this very much sets up the beginning of the next chapter #and was just fun to write in general!! #malec #malec fic #malec fic rec #singer!alec #celebrity!alec #famous!alec

[khalilhumam]

Universal Voting: Your questions, our answers

New Post has been published on http://khalilhumam.com/universal-voting-your-questions-our-answers/

Universal Voting: Your questions, our answers

By E.J. Dionne, Megan Bell, Amber Herrle, Shane P. Singh, Allegra Chapman, Joshua Douglas, Miles Rapoport, Whitney Quesenbery We hosted a virtual event this month about a new report which calls for universal voting in the United States. You can watch the hour-long video here and read the report here. We had so many excellent questions, some of which we were able to answer during the event, but we didn’t have time to get to every single question. So here are responses to some of the questions we didn’t have a chance to answer: Roughly 100,000,000 Americans did not vote in 2016 because they did not want to. These are the people who concern me. I don’t see anyone doing anything about it and it’s been 100,000,000 forever.  Thanks for this question, which goes to some of the central points of the report. We believe our election laws make it far more difficult for people to register and vote than they should and we propose significant reforms. We obviously believe that making voting a duty will create useful pressure to make it as easy as possible for people to vote and fulfil their obligation. Our election laws are especially difficult for young Americans to navigate, because young people are more mobile than older people. This is one reason why turnout is much lower among those under 45 and especially low for Americans under 30. The good news: turnout soared in 2018 and my hunch is that it will increase significantly in 2020. Nonetheless, we need the reforms we outline to get to full participation. –EJ Dionne, The Brookings Institution Would requiring everyone—including low-information voters—lead to erratic or unpredictable election results? We dedicate an entire section responding to this very question in the report. On principle, we object to the idea that “low-information” voters lack the understanding and knowledge required for voting. We believe that requiring everyone to vote—no matter their education level or political affiliation—will better represent popular will and lead to a far more representative system of governance. Historically, we’ve seen how “literacy tests” and other false measures of “competence” have been used to disenfranchise voters of color and the less well-off. There’s reason to believe that compulsory voting and its complementary reforms would increase citizen knowledge. Resources that were previously used for turning out the electorate could instead be reallocated to educating and persuading voters. Candidates and political parties would need to appeal to all voters, not just “likely” voters. Moreover, we propose enriching our nation’s civic culture by expanding civic education in schools, encouraging engagement in the election process, and conducting widespread voter education campaigns. On the question of erratic or unpredictable election results, it’s hard to believe that elections could be more erratic or unpredictable than they have been recently. In Australia, where mandatory participation has been the law for nearly a century, there is no evidence that their elections are more erratic or unpredictable than anyone else’s. We agree with the legendary political scientist V.O. Key Jr., who wrote in his book, The Responsible Electorate: “The perverse and unorthodox argument of this little book is that voters are not fools.” This view lies at the heart of our report. –Megan Bell and EJ Dionne, The Brookings Institution  If the proposal suggests that people would not be obligated to choose between the candidates and have the option of turning in a blank ballot, wouldn’t going to booths and waiting in line for long hours only not to vote for anyone redundant?   In a word, no. The allowance to abstain from voting but still comply with the mandate to show up (in-person, by mail, or through some online mechanism) is not redundant. We know this to be true from other countries that require comparable actions (participation without selection of any one candidate). In Australia, for example, citizens are required to “present themselves” to polling places for an election but aren’t required to select a candidate. With this 1924 mandate, the jump in turnout went from 60% in the 1920s to roughly 90% today. And the percentage of ballots spoiled or left blank is quite low: in 2010, it was reported to be six percent of cast ballots. This isn’t surprising, particularly since people are often inclined to do the default: In the same way one is likelier to enroll in a 401k at his or her workplace if required to opt-out rather than opt-in, voting can similarly become adopted and habitualized; it becomes likelier for the average citizen to do it when prompted by the government. Moreover, with the requirement in place, states and localities have to take on practices and reforms to ensure voting is actually easier: automatic registration, longer in-person early voting periods, establishment of more polling places, vote-by-mail options (plus elimination of hurdles such as voter ID). Essentially, all states would take on models comparable to those in Colorado, Oregon, and Washington, where wait times are minimal and turnout rates are higher. –Allegra Chapman, AAC Consulting How has this worked in other countries? The application of compulsory voting works differently across countries that currently mandate turnout, of which there are over 25. In some places, such as Australia, Singapore, and the Swiss canton of Schaffhausen, abstention is punishable with a monetary fine. This is generally not too onerous (for example, in Australia the penalty is AU$20). Elsewhere, nonvoting can lead to nonmonetary penalties. For example, in Brazil and Peru, abstention can prevent access to public services, such as loans from public banks or obtaining a passport. A number of countries, including Greece, Paraguay, and Turkey, have a legal requirement to vote but it is wholly unenforced or there are no specified penalties for abstention. Cross-national research shows that turnout rates tend to be highest where abstention penalties are meaningful and enforcement is likely. –Shane Singh, University of Georgia You mention that a “none of the above” option would be added to the ballot under this initiative. What happens if it wins? Even in one jurisdiction? This is an interesting question, though a “None of the Above” (NOTA) option winning an election seems very unlikely. In the report, we draw on two experiences of the NOTA option, the first in Nevada and the second in India. A “None of These Candidates” option has been available on all ballots in Nevada state and federal elections since 1976. Since then, the NOTA vote share in Nevada’s presidential elections has ranged from less than half of a percent to 2.56 percent in the 2016 election. The best national example of widespread use of NOTA is in India. In the first general election after the NOTA was added to the ballot, NOTA votes made up only 1.1 percent of the total vote share. One of the reasons we included NOTA in the proposal is because there is evidence that it actually encourages turnout. A 2020 voter experiment on the effects of NOTA found that including a NOTA option “increases participation and reduces the vote shares of non-establishment candidates.” –Amber Herrle, The Brookings Institution Wouldn’t universal civic duty voting require a constitutional amendment? (Like 13th, 15th, 19th) The Constitution leaves voting to the states — yes? Or would just legislation like the Voting Rights Act work to do it? The U.S. Constitution gives states the initial authority to regulate congressional elections, while Congress has the power to override those rules. Article I, Section 4 says that “The Times, Places and Manner of holding Elections…shall be prescribed in each State by the Legislature thereof; but the Congress may at any time by Law make or alter such Regulations.” In addition, Article I, Section 2 gives states the authority to determine who can vote in congressional elections. States also have the power to regulate their own elections, so long as those rules do not violate a constitutional mandate. So, a state could pass a law to adopt universal voting for elections that occur in the state, whether for president, Congress, or state elections. Although Congress has the power to “make or alter” state rules regarding the “time, place, or manner” of an election, universal voting might implicate Article I, Section 2, which gives states the exclusive power to determine who can vote in federal elections. Thus, it is less clear whether Congress itself could mandate universal voting in federal elections. That is one reason why our proposal focuses on states and even cities within states that have the power to determine the voting rules for local elections. Many voting changes begin at the local or statewide level and then spread to other places, ultimately culminating in a nationwide rule. That’s essentially what happened for the women’s suffrage movement and the 19th Amendment. We see universal voting as an idea that is best tried at the local or statewide level first, and states certainly have the constitutional power to implement this reform. –Joshua A. Douglas, author of “Vote for US: How to Take Back Our Elections and Change the Future of Voting” How would this initiative be enforced? We propose a modest (e.g., $20) fine for not voting, which would not be subject to increases, interest, and civil or criminal penalties. This fee would not be levied upon those with a valid excuse for not voting (e.g., sickness and disability, natural disasters, travel, and religious obligation or belief). It could also be waived through the completion of a small community service requirement. We also recommend that jurisdictions consider using incentives, such as discounted public fees, a refundable civic participation tax credit, or a lottery for which participation in the election is the entry as way to promote turnout. –Megan Bell and Amber Herrle, The Brookings Institution How do you ensure fines don’t fall disproportionately on Black, Indigenous, and Latinx voters under a universal voting scheme? And how could universal voting negatively affect the DREAMERS and other immigrants who may also become targets due to their inability to participate in this initiative? This is a great question and something that the working group considered seriously. There are legitimate fears that state and local officials might abuse the voting requirement to target certain communities. Our recommendations call for legislation carefully tailored to ensure access for all communities and protect against misuse or unintended negative consequences. Immigrants’ rights activists also raised well-founded concerns that inadvertent voting by noncitizens could subject them to unfair penalties. We write in the report that civic duty legislation should include “provisions to ensure that non-citizens and people with felony convictions are protected from penalty if they are mistakenly and unknowingly registered or required to vote.” As with Automatic Voter Registration, legislation must be carefully crafted to protect non-citizens and others who may be ineligible to vote in a certain jurisdiction. Moreover, with universal civic duty voting, election officials are tasked with making voting as easy as possible—resisting voter suppression and dismantling barriers to voting—which means fuller participation from all communities and therefore a more representative electorate. –Megan Bell and Amber Herrle, The Brookings Institution Don’t we need to make it easier to register and to vote first? Yes, absolutely. The proposal laid out in the report includes several complementary and collateral reforms that are essential to the success of universal voting. It would be impossible to have a system of universal voting without expanding opportunities for voter registration, increasing options for voting (including early voting and vote-by-mail), and strengthening election administration. We call for these reforms in the report on our section titled, “Paving the Way for Universal Voting.” –Amber Herrle, The Brookings Institution Do you mean all elections?  Primaries, state legislatures, county governments, municipal, school board, school budget, referendums?  There can be three or four elections in the same year. Is there a danger of trivializing the vote?  This was an important question to address because the United States has far more elections than most other countries. We believe the process should cover major elections, including congressional, statewide, and state legislative elections, with some flexibility given to states and municipalities who adopt universal civic duty voting, in regard to what elections it would cover. We hope that consideration of universal civic duty voting might be a spur to consolidate the calendars of elections, and we recommend that primaries be excluded, because they are party nominee-selecting processes, and not for all voters. –Miles Rapoport, Ash Center for Democratic Governance and Innovation, Harvard Kennedy School Is there any chance of making Election Day a Saturday? What about Election Day as a holiday? Making Election Day a holiday is an attractive idea if we abstract it to a question of how to we make voting a visible and celebrated part of life in a democracy. There are some good reasons to do it, especially if it became a focus for broader civic engagement. Practically, with schools and businesses closed, finding polling places and election workers would be easier if Election Day were a holiday. The challenge, however, is that many people have to work, even on holidays. And those people are often the ones who face the most barriers to voting, so there is a chance that it could increase disparities in participation and increase marginalization. There is also the question of how an Election Day holiday would impact the growing number of people who vote by mail or during early voting periods. In many states, you can already vote on a Saturday (or Thursday or Sunday). Before taking such a big national step, we need to make sure that it would actually meet the goal of increasing turnout. –Whitney Quesenbery, Center for Civic Design

[latinosbelike]

Music That Cures Seasonal Affective Disorder

By Daniela Serrano

Despite all my literary aspirations I spend more time listening to music than actually reading. Commuting used to be my reading time but given the choice of having to find a way to hold onto a chair and a book or music, I will choose music. Listening to music, for me, since I moved to Boston, has been something that while calling it political would be stretching the word too much, it certainly is deliberate. In one of the essays in Known and Strange Things Teju Cole says about music: “The music you travel with helps you to create your own internal weather.” When I read this I felt that flash of soul validation one feels when someone else puts into words what we have been struggling with. By putting on headphones and listening, always on repeat, oftentimes mumbling along--in a volume I am certain has made more than one commuter uncomfortable--every once in awhile softly dancing by myself, to the songs I like and the rhythms I wished were more common in Boston I am cocooning myself in this space where I am most me in a city that asks for too much assimilation.

Choosing a definitive list of favorite songs is slightly ridiculous. There is far too much music in the world to try to do something as nearsighted as a “definitive list of songs.” In an exercise pulled directly from High Fidelity one of my most favorite, problematic books I decided to cluster groups of songs when they suited different needs.I organized the songs by seasons because I found I need some of these songs with more urgency during certain weathers. Music has also helped me navigate this new phenomenon. Seasons. This radical and rather violent changing of the weather every set of months. We don't have this where I come from (Yes, Colombia doesn't really have seasons, No, Colombia is not hot all the time, we're not the caribbean). How do people not go insane in living with such an inconstant partner. Anyways, music, my own personal selection of music, has served as a stabilizing weather.

SPRING

1. "Las Transuentes” - Jorge Drexler

With its temperate weather and ontological confusion: is it its own season or just some taunting relapse of winter? It´s a time when I need something soft, but also something sweet. During Spring's warmer days I like to waltz around the city feeling as if everything belongs in a Jorge Drexler song. In particular this song. I also like to listen to pop-y reggae that reminds me of warm nights and drinks and the promise of people. 

2. “Dulcito e Coco” - Vicente García Junto a Kumary Sawyers 

Spring music, like the season itself should blend into the background and make the days bearable without quite marking them. I love in particular listening to Piel Canela, even when I believe it to be “Aunt Music” because it feels redeeming while living in a language that does not have the proper words to describe my skin. I think about this a lot. 

3. “Piel Canela” - Andres Cepeda

4. “Every Other Freckle” - alt-J

Although I know Alt-J is the one odd duck in the list, I still find myself returning to this song and band often. I like the music I like for the same reasons I like the people I like: porque sí and because there is something weird and appealing about them. This song is strange and soft and sometimes even I need a dose of English. 

SUMMER

5. “Sober” - Lorde

I both love and am terrified of Summer. The hours are too long and oftentimes there is too little to do. For me, at least, this particular Summer has involved two things that make me extremely uncomfortable: idle hours and writing. So even though I might front a lot about listening to music in Spanish, I can only write while listening to indie-singer/songwriter-type of music.

6. “The Ideal Husband” - Father John Misty

To be honest, had you looked into my most repeated songs three or four years ago it would have been all Indie Coffeehouse Playlist™. 

I´m all about Belle and Sebastian, I can not not pay attention to anything Father John Misty puts out. Guys, this is a big confession: Indie music is my biggest guilty pleasure. I tag it as guilty pleasure just because I know. I KNOW.  I have seen first-hand the level of pettiness and self importance that inflates people who usually like this music. I still like it. The writing is pretty and the singing is mumbled enough i don't feel tempted to sing along so it does not distract me from writing. 

7. “No Shade in the Shadow of the Cross” - Sufjan Stevens

I end Summer with Tú Sonrisa Inolvidable because it might be one of my Top Five favorite songs, and it deserves a spot somewhere. 

8. “Tú Sonrisa Inolvidable” - Fito Páez

FALL

Fall might be my favorite season for extremely sartorial reasons. It is the perfect season for cute dresses and cute jackets. It is also the weather most similar to home, I think. I like to listen to melancholy music here. They grey of the city does not get more colorful by listening to the always masterful old-school Shakira, but it is brighter. There are some people who, when extremely happy, only like to listen to really sad music. It is something like that.

9. “Que Me Quedes Tu” - Shakira

Things are never “bad” but they can always get better by blasting Me Dediqué a Perderte in my room as if it were a karaoke night after the worst breakup recorded by mankind.

10. “Me Dediqué a Perderte” - Alejandro Fernández

WINTER

11. “Señora” - Otto Serge

Two years ago, as I was preparing to go into the first real winter of my adult life I created a playlist I decided would cure me from any Seasonal Affective Disorder. Sort of a musical equivalent for those sunshine lamps. Since I am the only person who has listened to the playlist I can not claim it “scientifically” works, but it has certainly kept me together. And I believe it has kept me together due, only, to the extremely trash reputation of the music I chose.

On the first night we went out with my two American roommates, as we were asking each other the questions meant to paint an accelerated picture of  this-person-I-am-agreeing-to-pay-to-live-with, we talked about music. I told them I was very glad neither of them had any of the social context to judge the trash I listened to. They didn't understand how what I listed could be trash if all Latin music is dancey and fun. But it´s not. Some of it is vallenato, and although it is Intangible Cultural Heritage according to UNESCO it is also reminiscent of drunk, misogynistic men getting drunk off Old Parr. 

Some of it is reggaeton or salsa. An inordinate amount is champeta that I listen and dance to and sing badly both in private in public because walking about the city with Kevin Florez blasting in my headphones feels like keeping a unique kind of secret. 

12. “La Invite A Bailar” - Kevin Florez

I am aware that the lyrics in most of these songs are problematic at best. But, in all my reading, and lord knows i read a lot, few genres provide such catchy and immediately satisfying lines as “Hay un chorro de bobos que te tienen ganas / pero dile que tu eres Del Rey como Lana”.

13. “Si Tu Novio Te Deja Sola” - J. Balvin  ft. Bad Bunny

At the end of the day what I listen to falls squarely within the realm of things that are my problem. And I will listen to anything and everything that makes me happy, and smile, and reminds me that I used to live in a place where, if I wanted to, I could have gone out dancing every week. And I never did, because I never liked it that much. Until I missed it.  

14. “El Preso” - Fruko y sus Tesos

Listen to full playlist here:

Daniela Serrano is a Colombian editor and translator currently based in Boston.

#playlist #latinx #latinxs #latin@s be like #Latin@ #colombiana #music #vallenato #otto serge #frukoysustesos #kevin florez #alejandro fernández #shakira #lorde #father john misty #jorge drexler #seasons #summer #spring #winter #fall #Mixtape #internal weather #vicente garcia

[kenzieannbeattie]

I got engaged in December of 2013. It was one of those engagements where we didn’t know when we were going to get married but as long as we knew it was going to happen we didn’t mind. We had our minds set on a few dates but with Tyler in college and getting pregnant, we decided we were going to wait. I wasn’t even 21 yet and anyone who knows my family or our friends knows how silly it would be to be under the age of 21 and have a “Beattie” wedding. So we finally agreed on August 5th 2017. We struggled so much on what date to go with until one night I had a dream and Tyler had said, “let’s get married on August 5th….”. I woke up and looked at the calendar and found August 5th and looked for the year that is fell on a Saturday. Thats is how August 5th 2017 became the day we would get married.

Lets recap some of the big moments we experienced all while trying to figure out how to have our wedding before we reached that awkward five year engagement stage…

We had our daughter Ariyana on February 12th 2015 and bought our first house December of 2015. We then moved to Maryland for Tyler’s internship in May 2016, where he got a job offer to stay but we decided it wasn’t in our best interest. Tyler then graduated college with his Bachelors in December 2016 and in February 2017 we finally relocated to Chesterfield MI. So with all of this taking place I forgot that, “Oh hey…you are getting married in six months and you have nothing planned”. That four-year head start I thought I had was meaningless. Not to mention we were a good four hours away from our wedding location and every company we used. But we made our obstacles work and that is why I know, so can you.

So where does one even start when planning a wedding?

Here are some tips and ideas to help make planning your day, easier!

Guest List:  Holy crap! This was the most irritating part of the whole thing. I think that I had at least three different lists going at one time because it was so hard to decide who was going to be invited to one of the biggest days of my life. You would think this would be the easiest part, just invite everyone! YEAH I WISH! It would have been awesome to invite every single person Tyler and myself have known over the course of our relationship. Unfortunately, we didn’t have the location, or funds to make that dream a reality.

Do I invite immediate family or all family? Close friends or do we invite college and high school friends also? Then don’t forget, family friends, parent’s friends? Kids? No kids? Who is that going to upset? Trust me its overwhelming to say the least.

This was the biggest obstacle I faced because I am a people pleaser and I did not want to offend anyone or have anyone think that they weren’t important enough to be invited to our wedding. But that is simply not the case.

You have to be realistic when it comes to your guest list. You have to think about who would actually come. Have you talked to this person in the last year? Would this person be someone you walked up to if you seen him or her at the store? Would they walk up to you? Has this family member talked to you in the last few years? Have they met your kids? Life is busy so its understandable that not every single person that is important to you has been able to stay in touch as much as they may have liked, but I promise you, it is not hard to see its someone’s birthday and take five minutes out of the day to say Happy Birthday. One thing that really helped me was asking myself these questions: have they came to things you have invited them to in the past? Did they have a valid excuse if not? You have to take those little things into consideration because lets face it, invitations alone cost a good amount of money.

Venue:  This was one thing that I did research on for what felt like forever! The biggest thing you need to know when deciding where you want your venue is your budget. The next thing you need to decide is whether or not you want to have someone cater your food and provide your alcohol or if you want to do so yourself. Either option is a good option. Doing it yourself can save you money but it also requires more work. I went the do it yourself route in order to save money, so I needed to find a venue that was going to let me do my own food and alcohol. After long hours on the Internet and asking around, I found the Loading Dock in Shelby Michigan. It is a two-story building that is beautiful and you are able to provide everything yourself. I decided I wanted to have my wedding and reception at the same location just because it was a little further away from where most of us lived. However, I had a large amount of guests attending, and limited space for both ceremony and reception set up, so about a month before, I rented out the pavilion that was right next to it. It honestly couldn’t have worked out more perfect!

Here is a list of different locations in the West Michigan Area.

The loading dock: http://www.renttheloadingdock.com

The Double JJ: http://www.doublejj.com

Leighton Hall: http://www.leightonhallmi.com

Lewis Orchards: http://www.lewisorchardweddings.com

The Cheney Place: http://www.thecheneyplace.com

All Saints Church: http://allsaintsfremont.org

Little red Barn of Nunica: http://www.littleredbarnofnunica.com

Century Club Ballroom: http://centuryclubballroom.com

The Barn at Town Corners: http://www.thebarnattowncorners.com

You will also need to figure out if the venue provides things such as tables and chairs. This is something that can add up as well. I ended up renting tables from Oceana builders in shelby MI ( http://oceanabuilders.com). I went with round tables because I liked the way it looked. However, if you need to fit more people in a space, I recommend getting long tables.

Save the dates:  Lets just start by saying this is something that can be done differently based on budget and still have the same outcome. Its just going to depend on what methods you want to take. We had my cousin take the pictures for our save the dates. We got lucky because we had someone to do that. Otherwise honestly there are a bunch of cute save the date cards and invitations out there these days that look just as good without a picture. I spent a while looking for deals on the Internet for both save the dates and invitations. I recommend looking and waiting for certain deals because you really can save a ton of money this way. My best friend literally just got all her save the dates for free from Wal-Mart because she found a deal where you could print an unlimited number of 4×6 pictures. So can you guess who just made her save the dates in form of a picture and saved so much money? And to top it off, they looked just as good as mine did.

You could honestly even buy heavy-duty paper and make cutes ones using Microsoft programs. This was one idea I had but for me it just wasn’t as convenient because ink and a printer, paper and envelopes added up to just as much as going through a company. But some people can make it work!

Here are the two websites that I used. They had fast shipping and the packaging was always very nice. My favorite part is that they are always running good deals.

Ann’s Bridal Bargains: www.annsbridalbargains.com

Shutterfly: (Wedding Paper Divas’): www.shutterfly.com

One thing to remember though, is that if you are not planning to travel city to city to hand deliver each of these yourself, you are going to have to purchase stamps. This was not something that even crossed my mind because who would think that stamps would be a big-ticket item when it comes to money. But with my 200 save the dates, 200 invitations, 200 RSVP cards, bridal shower invites, at .49 a stamp… it adds up and it adds up quickly. So saving money by finding good deals is really important, especially if you are not trying to take out a separate loan just to tie the knot.

Wedding Dress:  We all I am sure have seen the TV show Say Yes to the Dress. It would be awesome to say I just spent $10,000 on so and so original…or not! But seriously, I know of people who have spent $60 on their wedding dress and I know others who have spent $5,000+.

I personally had a budget of less than $1,500 and for me I had a wonderful mother who had me covered. I got my wedding dress first thing, so about a year early. I don’t regret that one bit. I got my dress at David’s Bridal in Grand Rapids. They had a ton of different options that suited me well. I went dress shopping with my best friend who was also getting married so we went with our moms, her dad, my grandma and my cousin who happens to be best friends with us both. I got a lady that was super nice and all about making sure I was happy. She got a lady that was less concerned in making it a great experience for her, which was super annoying but happens. I went in not knowing what type of dress I wanted and knowing nothing about designers. I had always thought I wanted a princess style dress with a ton of bling so, I tried on four dresses, no princess style, all bling, and I fell in love with the fourth. I said yes to the dress, got to ring the bell and then checked out. A few weeks later my mother and I made a trip down to Grand Rapids to pick up my dress.  The lady working comes out saying “oh I Love this dress it is so pretty”. I looked at the dress and it was the ugliest thing I have ever seen. I just remember saying, “okay that is nice but this is NOT my dress”. I looked over at my moms face praying she wasn’t about to have a freak out Mother of the Bride moment…but she calmly got out her phone and showed the lady what the dress was suppose to be. Turns out the store marked two dresses with the same identification number and it just so happened to be not the one I wanted. However, it actually worked in my benefit because the dress I picked out was a few hundred dollars more and because of their mess up, we got it at the same price as the other dress. This was proof that good things can come out of bad situations.

So if you are not planning to drop 50 pounds before your big day, I recommend getting this done and out of the way as soon as possible. Your dress and your bridesmaid dresses!

Bridesmaid Dresses:  Getting all my girls together at the same time wasn’t as hard as I imagined it would be. I had six of the very best bridesmaids. We picked a date and time and all met at David’s Bridal in Grand Rapids. The best part about getting the dresses there was that if there wasn’t a sale going on they were guaranteed $20 off because of the fact that I got my dress there as well.

I was not a picky bride and I surely didn’t want them to spend $150+ on a dress that was ugly. So the only thing that I asked was that it was a long dress. Other than that I really didn’t even care if it was the same dress, as long as the colors matched. So we found the dress we all liked and the lady there said it would take about four weeks to come in.

So with the normal “I need to slim down” goals that every girl has before walking down the aisle in a wedding, the girls waited a few more months before putting their order in. When the time came to order the girls called and the lady said, “we can’t do that color in the time frame because it is a popular choice this time of year”… Nightmare!

I started looking at other stores, but all were either way more expensive then I wanted them to spend or not in the right color. This left me the option to change the color. It all worked out in the end because the gold metallic we went with was super pretty and just happened to go with the rest of my decorations. But can you imagine the panic if it didn’t work out or I would have had a bridezilla moment?

Anyways, some of the girls went and got measured and some just ordered online. The dresses all came in within a few weeks of them ordering, which was awesome. The only thing I stress is making sure they all try on the dresses right away so that any alterations that need to be made can be done in time! That way you have zero dress dilemmas day of! We lived and learned on that one! Just remember that no matter how picky you are and what expectations you have, be thankful for the bridesmaids. It is not the cheapest role to take on and it definitely can be one of the more stressful.

Groomsmen Attire:  The best part of figuring out what the guys are going to wear is that it can literally be anything. If you want casual it can be casual. If you want full suit, that would look great also. We shot for somewhere in between. My guys had black pants, a white shirt, suspenders, bow tie, and a jacket (which they ended up ditching right after pictures). I loved this look! But I have also seen jeans and a vest look good too, so it really is all up to what you are picturing.

We went to Men’s Warehouse because it was the most convenient for us. All the guys were spread out across Michigan, so the fact that there were stores also spread out across Michigan really helped. I was able to design the look online and create an account. The guys were able to go in and reference the number and order their suits that way. My favorite part was that they have online chat so if you needed to change anything about the look, you were able to without having to make an extra trip into the store.

Also if you had a certain number of tux rentals, the groom gets his free! And we all know by this time, anything helps! $$

Decorations:  We made all of our decorations ourselves. I waited for Hobby Lobby and Michaels to have there 50% off sales for the items I needed: glassware, candles, picture frames, fake flowers, etc.

I got my tablecloths from the website Linen Tablecloth: www.linentablecloth.com. This was the cheapest website I found tablecloths from and trust me I looked everywhere. I wanted the cloths to go all the way to the floor because to me that just really brought the appearance to another level.

I bought plastic plates from the company www.boxed.com. I was able to get over 400 plates for $200, which was awesome! You could also go with paper plates, especially if you are doing buffet set style food. I however had the plates set up at the tables before hand to tie together the simple decorations that I used.

The last thing we did was hung lights everywhere! We are so thankful for my father and mother in-law for taking the time to do that! It made the world of a difference. For lights you can get them basically anywhere. We used the stands of Christmas lights that our family had and then my mother bought the bigger style ones from TJMaxx!

Overall my decorations, plates and tablecloths all cost under $500 and I couldn’t have asked for it to look better!

Flowers:  I went super simple with flowers. I did baby’s-breath for my bridesmaids, groomsmen’s, my father, ushers and officiant. My flowers were simple as well, but turned out beautiful. You can also do flowers for the mothers and grandparents. It all just really depends on how traditional you want to go. For me, I have so many grandparents and to get them flowers would have cost me close to $100 with just them. So it made the most sense for me and my budget to just get the people flowers who were in the ceremony.

I went through Jenifer Vincent who is located in Fremont Michigan. Her business is called Linden Floral, LLC. (http://www.lindenfloralllc.com) She recently moved her store to Hidden Treasures right down town Fremont.  She was amazing to work with and her pricing was great! Especially because I changed my mind a few different times because of budgeting concerns and she was so helpful and patient with me.

The great thing about flowers is that you can go big or small and they will look fantastic. I just recommend getting someone to do it; it is one less thing you have to worry about getting done!

Photography:  When it comes to wedding photography there are a few different options. You can spend 1000+ on a photographer or you can take the cheaper route and have someone you know take them.

For me, the pictures were not the most important part. I knew that no matter what, I was going to be able to get a few good photos that I could post online and get blown up for my house décor. Other than that I knew they were just going to sit on the computer or in a photo album.But I am not going to lie getting a professional to do your pictures would be less stressful. I got lucky because my cousin was just beginning her photography career, so I hired her and she did great. I got a ton of photos that were wall worthy, plus she was able to capture great moments all throughout my reception.

There were a few mishaps that we had to deal with though so my biggest advice is to make sure whoever is taking the pictures has enough memory cards to last the entire wedding. You can’t even imagine how fast those things fill up! It is better to be extra prepared than anything! So when hiring a professional photographer, you would not have to worry about the little hiccups like that, but it will cost you a pretty penny.

Another thing is giving yourselves time to take the pictures.  I literally had like 45 minutes to load up my bridal party, get pictures with all my family and go and get pictures done. It did not leave us much time. Although we got good pictures with the group, we were majorly lacking on pictures of just the two of us, which is a total bummer. We will probably just end up doing that new anniversary photo-shoot where you dress up in your wedding attire and take photos. I am just glad someone did that first so now I have that option.

Entertainment:  We went with a DJ. Anyone who knows me knows that music was one of the most important things to me. Getting married to the love of my life was one thing, but getting to dance the night away with all the people that make my life complete was another.

We went with the company Sounds R Us because it just so happens to be Tyler’s brother. But other than that we heard great things about the company and their abilities. I had seen him perform at two other weddings prior to my wedding as well, so that made the decision very easy for me! He already has booked a few of my friends since then, so go look him up on Facebook! Or shoot me a comment and I can get you his number!!

He even did as much as save my wedding ceremony because my brother had dropped my speaker and broke it the night before, so you can say I was extra thankful when he said he could do it without a problem!

Honestly, the night turned out great. We had great music all night and we were able to request what we wanted when we wanted.

Transportation:  Don’t wait! Seriously. If you plan to have a limo/ party bus get this rented and done right away. We didn’t.

We originally went through the online company www.price4limos.com.  This company finds you the best priced company for your event and area. We were able to find a limo company through them and give them details on when and where. We got as far as paying the deposit and confirming everything. The next day we were informed that they didn’t pay attention to the zip code and they thought it was a different location. At this point, I was devastated and in tears. I just had to remember that this was not the point of getting married and it had to be happening for a reason. Luckily, with the help of my awesome husband, we ended up finding a company that had a karaoke van that they let us rent out. It all ended up working out just fine but this is why I recommend getting this out of the way first.

Party favors:  This was one thing I didn’t put much thought into. When I go to weddings the last thing I care about is what I get to bring home. So while I was planning, I initially didn’t even think I was going to end up having anything. But at last minute the website totally promotional (https://www.totallypromotional.com) was having a great deal that I could not pass up. The company took about a month to complete the order but it was great.

I ended up getting stadium type cups that had a cute little saying on it along with our initials and the date.

Here are some other ideas for wedding favors: mason jars, chap stick, koozies, cups, pens, candies, etc.

*One of my wedding favorites so far was at my uncles wedding; he had someone make the alcoholic beverage “apple pie”. They put it in cute little mason jars and it was a huge hit!

You can’t really go wrong with wedding favors, but just make sure you have enough for everyone!

Salon apportionments:  This is one thing you are going to want to plan and schedule right away. Especially if the salon you use is always busy.

I went to Snipperz Salon In Fremont Michigan and they are the only people I would recommend. The staff is beyond amazing and you will 100% leave happy. Just make sure you make your appointments right away. I made mine well in advance and still had another wedding the same day as mine! So don’t ever think you have time! Get those appointments made and make sure you give yourself enough time to get everything else done.

As for nails, it is usually easy enough to get in the week of your wedding, so you don’t have to worry about that. Just make sure you don’t get them done too early because you don’t want to risk them getting broke or scuffed.

So with all that being said

I honestly couldn’t have asked for a better wedding day. It was beautiful weather, everything went according to plan, and I got to marry my best friend.

Overall my advice is to make the day about you. Don’t forget that. I had someone tell me once that my wedding day was for my guests. I just don’t agree with that statement. The wedding is for you. You are the one who put forth the effort to make it to this moment. You are the one who has dealt with the good, the bad, and the ugly. So just have fun, don’t stress too much and go marry the one you love.

  Have you said I DO? I got engaged in December of 2013. It was one of those engagements where we didn’t know when we were going to get married but as long as we knew it was going to happen we didn’t mind.

[ghostlybouquetballoonstuff-blog1]

Forex In Australia

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[anautisticdragon-blog]

Mythbustin'

There's something that's been coming together in my head, lately. It's a combination of this article on Science Alert which deals with hoaxes, this video by Mike Rowlands about the absolutely ridiculous #pizzagate conspiracy, and this response by Shaun to the hateful idiocy of denying Native American genocide.

The lattermost especially gets me, honestly. "Boo-hoo. I shouldn't have to feel bad. If I listen to the sociopaths and let them brainwash me, though, I don't have to feel bad! Hooray! Genocide against the American Natives is a lie, yo!"

Why does this happen?

I've covered it recently. There are different kinds of person in this world. I feel that anyone on the autistic spectrum -- and this includes properly diagnosed introverts, as they're basically the non-clinical end of autism according to modern psych thinking, which I agree with -- are going to have a proper immunity to marketed conspiracy theories. However, agentic extraverts, sociopaths, and psychopaths alike will have a vested interest in getting better and better at producing these marketed conspiracy theories.

Why? There's another group: Affiliative extraverts. They tend to make up the largest group of people on earth, and what they believe tends to be dictated to them by animal emotion. They're very gullible, vulnerable, simplistic people who enjoy tribalism, dualistic perspectives, and conspiracy theories if they explain the 'hardships' they've had to endure.

Let me remind you that one agentic extravert I knew who I tried to befriend to prove to myself that they aren't all arseholes (sadly, they are), tried to convince me that he -- privileged, rich, straight & white boy that he is -- had experienced prejudice.

What is prejudice would be a good question to ask, here. Some of us will know, some of us have experienced it at the callous mitts of sociopaths and their affiliative extravert enablers before. It makes your life hell, you're not allowed to do anything or act independently, and you're afraid to leave your house as you might be met with one of many joyously wonderful kinds of violence.

What did he think prejudice was? People saying improper things about him behind his back... No, really. I genuinely so wish I was kidding, I want to be pulling your leg.  I mean, you'd say "Pull the other one, it's got bells on!" right now and you'd have every right to! Sadly...

No, that's what he believed. And he tried to manipulate me into accepting this viewpoint. That was one of the many reasons I called off our friendship. That and he tried to twist my arm so I'd buy the Stormfront-esque pseudoscientific conspiracy about the hidden differences between the intelligences of men and women.

I still have some fondness for him so I won't call him a shitlord, but... He's definitely shitlord influenced.

So why do we see conspiracy/bullshit views of the Alt-Blight Nazi movement gain traction? Affiliative extraverts. Like I said, they're a gullible lot, and they tend to listen to overwrought displays of expressive emotion designed to manipulate more than they'd listen to a well reasoned argument that isn't trying to 'win' but merely introduce them to new ideas, perspectives, and facts.

Consider, for example, Shaun and Captain Andy. Both make marvellous videos that debunk the ridiculousness of these mendicants at every turn. But they're less popular.

I know why.

They're not yelling at the screen angrily, are they? They're not trying to get their audience fired up 'with them.' Nor are they attempting to involve a stupefied, mesmerised audience in a fake 'underground resistance' against 'the evil lies of the left trying to keep them down.' Apparently the political left is 'The Man' now??? When'd that happen?

You can see it in the video by Shaun I linked in the opening paragraph. The person Shaun is responding to is incredibly bombastic, larger than life, shouty, and evangelical. He's trying to involve people in a movement. The kind of person Shaun is responding to is a cult leader, the kind of YouTuber who manages to create overnight cargo cults because affiliative extraverts are just that gullible.

Now, I'm not going to fall for this shit, nor is someone like Shaun. The problem? Shaun, Captain Andy, myself, and many others are simply too flat and long-winded for the short attention spans of the affiliative extraverts. We're not making a sales pitch, we're not trying to be Apple and sell our views in rose gold or whatever other new colour they're now peddling to sell more phones than anyone needs.

We're not evangelical salespeople.

The agentic extravert, the sociopath, and the psychopath all have one thing in common: They're like slimy used car salespeople. They effectively are the very definition of that trope, and you'll walk out of their dealership with a car whether you like it or not. These used car salespeople do loads of research as to how to best manipulate people, they read up on how to be more Machiavellian, how to play on emotion, how to use cargo cult thinking like NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) to 'control' their customers.

And I'm not even the one who believes in NLP, here! Haha. No. I've always called out NLP for being a cargo cult of rabid crazies. If you want a REAL version of what NLP is, look at something like CBT, which is used correctly for therapy. NLP is just a creepy grab bag of tricks -- which sometimes works on extremely gullible affiliative extraverts -- turned into a cult.

The agentic extravert ex-friend who I tried to befriend to prove to myself that they had some redeeming quaities also believed in NLP. It's sad. It really is.

So we have these bombastic salespeople using Machiavellian tricks to convince people of all sorts of nonsense. That #pizzagate was real but covered up; That the history of Native American genocide is a lie meant to keep white people down; That dark matter exists despite a mounting lack of evidence for and a non-trivial amount of evidence against; That the moon landing is a hoax; That 9/11 was an inside job, and worse.

These people are successful because they're great at making cults. And with the tribal nature of gullible affiliative extraverts who always want to be in the best, most beneficial herd? That's the way to go. Affiliative extraverts love being in cults, they love enabling sociopaths. How do you think cults happen? How do you think an autistic person would likely respond to a cult leader? Have a guess.

"You bloody wot, mate? Pull the uvver one, it's got bells on! You're having a laugh, you are! I mean, I weren't born yesterday ya stupid sod."

I don't know if we'd be so stereotypically British (as a Brit, stereotypes about us amuse me), but we'd largely say 'sod that for a game of soldiers!' and be done with it.

The point is? Autistic people don't fall for this, nor do introverts, because we've a different kind of brain that isn't prone to accepting nonsense information. It's why autistic people are immune to marketing. There's research about this and varies studies that show it's true, you can look it up if you're interested. Essentially, marketing just never works on autistic people because we dismiss it as nonsense. We can easily recognise that it is.

If it's manipulative, bombastic, and emotional enough, though, affiliative extraverts can be easily convinced of just about nearly anything. No matter what the nonsense quotient is! And with affiliative extraverts being the largest group of people out there? Well, with a little trickery, you now have an army of enablers.

That's how capitalism works, after all. You trick the gullible affiliative extraverts into thinking they need your product to stay relevant to their own tribe. So then people rush out to buy it in droves. Why do you think Apple's marketing is so successful?

As sad as it is? The left need to start doing this. We need to sway the affiliative extraverts around to our way of thinking. Not with facts, and realisations, and kindly offered outside perspectives. No, that doesn't work on them. We need to use evangelical, bombastic, overly emotional arguments. We need to make a big spectacle of it.

We need to make a scene of mythbusting the Alt-Blight. We need to stop being so bloody nice. There's a reason 'the nice guy finishes last' after all. The question is: Can we stop being nice? It's so ingrained in our nature that that's why I know who I can trust, it's difficult for us to be evil simply because we're not genetically complicit with evil in the way that extraverts (affiliative and agentic), sociopaths, and psychopaths are.

So we're going to have to fake it. We have to try our best to dismantle the systems of how they get gullible people to buy their crap and then use those systems against them to mythbust that crap.

As much as I hate it, we might have to learn how to be Machiavellian to come out the other side of this.

That or master space travel before anyone else and get off this rock so that we can enjoy life in space whilst the extraverts blow themselves to smithereens.

That too is valid.

#alt-right #sjw #politics #conspiracy theroy