#and still being kind

[kait-bait8]

The thing I love the most about the Hunger Games is Katniss’ character arc.

Katniss Everdeen in book 1 is like Harry Potter in book 7. That is to say, the Katniss we follow in THG is the strong and resilient fighter. She is brave and selfless and tough and she digs deep despite tremendous pain. She has already overcome the loss of her father and the dire circumstances of her youth. And the 74th Hunger Games should have been her boss fight.

The end of THG shows us a Katniss who is a champion, a winner, a Victor. It feels like we are at the triumphant end of a story. Until she is told that the Capitol is not happy.

In Catching Fire we learn about Katniss’ nightmares. We learn that she sometimes can’t look at Prim without seeing Rue. We see her relationships begin to strain and change.

Katniss finding out that she will be going back into the games is one of my all time favorite scenes. Because in THG Katniss is in Survival Mode from the second she steps onto the platform. She holds back her tears and tries to look indifferent for the sponsors. But in CF she shatters. She flees. She cries and drinks and screams. She isn’t strong or resilient or even a little brave. And you just don’t see heroes react like that in other stories. But you can’t tell me it’s possible to read that scene and not feel your own stomach twist at the thought of that reality.

When Peeta hits the barrier and his heart stops Katniss loses it. It’s clear she knows about CPR from watching her mother, the same way she knew about blood poisoning and tourniquets in the last games, but it doesn’t even occur to her until after Finnick starts kissing Peeta. She isn’t sharp and quick and able to think on her feet. She is desperate to keep Peeta and the rebellion alive and that is it. People say that the victors keep Peeta alive because “if they didn’t Katniss would kill everyone and then herself” but Katniss knew her fate. She knew she wasn’t going to survive the arena. And she knew a life without Peeta was pointless. She would have “stopped living” like her mother.

When Katniss is rescued and Peeta is not, there was no “what is the plan? How are we going to get Peeta back? How are we going to save him?” There was only enough energy and emotion to try to claw Haymitch’s eyes out.

And then we get to Mockingjay. I’ve heard people complain that they couldn’t get through the book because it was just Katniss sleeping all the time. But of course she is sleeping all the time. Of course she can hardly qualify to be a soldier. Of course she finds solace in Finnick and his rope tying.

She doesn’t assassinate President Snow on her rogue mission. She gets her friends killed. She can’t even save Prim. Katniss gets knocked out and wakes up with the War already won. She secures the safety of Panem for a time by killing Coin but even that is the act of someone who no longer cares for her own safety and well-being.

I’m not saying she doesn’t do anything, she does an incredible amount for her mental/emotional state. But she isn’t Strong or Brave or Resilient. She doesn’t dig deep because even if she did there wouldn’t be anything left. She is completely broken.

That is what makes her epilogue so beautiful. Because at the end of her story she isn’t a Victor. She isn’t The Hero. She just, learns to be okay. She falls in love and finds peace and happiness and safety. I don’t know if I would say that she ever becomes unbroken but she picks up the pieces she can salvage and does her best with them.

Katniss Everdeen’s character arc is not one of Strength. There are many strong characters. It is a study of weakness and the beauty and love and community that comes from weakness.

#Katniss Everdeen #the girl who WAS on fire #what a beautiful character #what a beautiful story of falling apart #of being a victim of your circumstances at every turn #and still being kind #and still finding love #figuring out that okay is enough #the hunger games #thg #Suzanne Collins

[inkskinned]

because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.

you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.

you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.

don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.

if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.

you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:

how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!

aren't you happy yet?

#almost wrote the champagne line as ''effervescent'' but legit could not write it without saying ''effervescent like a snail'' #ah tumblr... #writeblr #warm up #idk . having trouble writing rn #ps i don't like to talk about it . it is my medical information. but before you ask. yes this is about being on the spectrum #i really don't like when ppl make my writing about how im [whatever ID]. i want it to ring true for the people who it rings true for #i don't want it to be like ''awwwww look at this person!!! she's the EXCEPTION!!! :)" ..... #no.... not really..... #idk something gross happens whenever i admit to certain conditions and i turn into like inspiration p*rnography #like yes they actually let us use keyboards these days #furthermore i just... dont feel comfortable talking about this part of me. i had too bad of a childhood. adhd is one thing... #this one im like. still coming to terms with. which is like. my own journey. #idk. just please be kind. some things are more private than others. this one feels private to me. #i do not know how to help others w/this . and i do not know how to help myself. i will talk about it if im ever ready. idk if that will #actually ever happen #ty in advance i love u im kissing you we are kissing somewhere on the spectrum

[astearisms]

catalysts, protectors

#man those episodes #so many things put into perspective #like Simon’s role as a protector and his kindness and empathy and compassion and existence being the catalyst for the rest of ooo to #flourish #and Betty is a protector of Simon #I wonder if the last two episodes will explore more of her character? there’s so much to be explored about her giving so much of herself #to Simon but not thinking about what she wants for herself #do we get to explore her feelings or see her at all? will she have changed or learned to let go #I think there will be some sort of closure for the both of them #but at what cost #I am still crying over that scene with Simon’s memory of Betty and their song #my art #fionna and cake #fionna and cake spoilers #simon petrikov #betty grof #petrigrof #golbetty

[fefairys]

getting real fed up with my peers treating teenagers like shit. how did you forget so fucking quickly what it's like to be them. shame on you.

#this is about people my age getting into internet discourse with teenagers #and calling them stupid and overall belittling them and being a jerk to them #like. literally just block them if they are being a shithead #teenagers are shitheads sometimes #youre not going to change them #they need to grow up on their own #and an adult making fun of them isnt going to help #in fact it is going to hinder the process #if you want to try to help you need to be kind #if theyre not receptive to that and are still being an asshole then it is not worth it #and you need to go do something else with your time #you are a fucking adult

[egophiliac]

just something I wanted to try! (tumblr please don't absolutely destroy this, thank you)

#art #twisted wonderland #gif warning #gifs that remind you that they are still just cats warning #i was going to do the tail stepped but i actually kind of liked it with the interpolation? #i thought it would look weird with cheka being frame by frame but. i dunno. ymmv but i think it's kind of fun! #it is also Late™ and i did this mostly all in one sitting so my brain is kind of fried #that's my excuse and i'm sticking to it

[kingstooth]

heres to the other dandelions out there

#to grow without being nurtured by kindness but in spite of lack of care #maybe you were not treated with love. but still you sprouted in the hostility and grew to meet the sun #dandelions

[jakeperalta]

the taylor swift ai porn issue is such a bleak reminder of how inescapable the horrors of misogyny are. like obviously there's the talk of sort of "celebrity problems" like treatment by the tabloids etc, but beyond that there's just the constant heinous shit that women seemingly cannot escape no matter what. it doesn't matter that she (as well as other female celebrities) is extremely rich and famous and successful and has basically as much privilege and power as it is possible for any person to have, ultimately that's still not enough to escape the revenge porn and sexual assault and stalking and harassment. like there is literally no level of power a woman can have that puts her out of reach of all the men who hate women and want to control and humiliate and subjugate us in any way they can.

#with the obvious addition that if you do not hold these privileges of being rich/white/able bodied/straight/cis etc etc then it's even worse #(which is why even someone who hates taylor with their entire being should still root for her in situations like this. #because if someone with all of her power and resources and privilege can't fight something like this then what kind of hope is there for #any other random woman or girl who faces the same thing.) #talking

[withdenim]

Local man desperately trying to stop the cycle before it gets to his kids (it’s already there)

#with great power comes You Are Still A Child. Be A Child. Do Not Kill This Part Of Yourself Because You Think I Won’t Love You If You Don’t #‘there comes a time when we all must grow up’ and that time has no obligation to come at 15 #ninjago #lego ninjago #my art #lloyd garmadon #dragons rising #ninjago lloyd #ninjago sora #lloyd and sora have so many fuckinf parallels man I’m crazy #they keep doing the same things they keep being like each other #that’s his kind of daughter TO ME

[cor-lapis]

Fontaine is in remarkably good shape after getting completely submerged. Even Dvalin threw a few signs on roofs and whatnot

Kaveh and al-Haitham redesigns are mine (still WIP), while Nahida's is by fallencrowkarma

Masterpost of other quest sketches

#anyway glad tartaglia got some enrichment this update #wriothesley's ark being able to fly was kind of hilarious. was that necessary duke. the entire nation is covered in water anyway #the thing is. people didn't dissolve. but I assume they can still drown ToT but everyone seems to have been fine??? #oh well. anyway furina deserves the world and if she has one fan that's me if she has zero fans- #genshin impact #my art #4.2 spoilers #genshin spoilers #navia #arlecchino #neuvillette #gi traveler #paimon #mona megistus #barbeloth #i guess. #furina #lyney #egeria #focalors #rukkhadevata #makoto #ig??? #dainsleif #he got zapped #tartaglia #skirk #kaveh #al-haitham #lynette

[ruporas]

the blank ticket in your hand is just waiting to be filled in.

happy birthday vash! (ID in alt text)

#vash the stampede #trigun #trigun maximum #trigun maximum spoilers #trimax spoilers #vashwood #i actually made it... im crying... was devastated for a bit bc i thought i wouldnt had anything for vash's bday!! #but happy birthday to the twins.. vash and knives... #no matter what i was going to make a vash centric post im sorry knives... i have a comic in progress also but it was taking too long T_T #that one would celebrate both of them slightly more fairly! but anyway. #birthdays to someone like vash must not mean a whole lot. even the first one - him and knives were like oh what... cool.. i don't think the #had the chance to celebrate much after that :pensive: and vash probably spent most of his birthdays like any other day so i kind of just #wanted to celebrate him living and being alive - living for as long as he did and the people that eventually made living worth it #keep counting the years vash!!! even if you dont have birthday parties - it's still very very special #quote is directly from rem’s speech in ch 41 also #ruporas art

[lazylittledragon]

it’s being normal about dad gale hours again

#bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #gale dekarios #gale of waterdeep #dadkarios #galemance #your honour they are So tired #i think gale is a very ‘10pm is a late one’ kind of person so he’s not thriving #esp because cyra was Very unwell for a while so he was looking after a brand new mabel by himself #do you think he ever thought a tiny redhead pulling him out of a portal would lead to a morgue being installed in his house #it's v on brand for cyra to be literally about to have a baby and still hacking up corpses #i love that she isn't even my durge she is just like this #tw blood #cw pregnancy

[raepliica]

(content warning: blood)

Sewed Up Heart

[ID: A Trigun comic done in grayscale with red accents. First, an anatomical heart gushes blood, forming a puddle which shifts into Vash's coat. Vash's gloved hands can be seen sewing up a tear at the hem.

Vash raises his hands, which are now bare and covered in blood. He looks sweaty and distressed, and he raises his coat to his face and cries into it. His clenched hands rip the sewed portion apart, and the red thread leads to a heart whose own stitches are tearing apart. The background gets darker and darker, and the red looks brighter and starker against it.

Then the background returns to white, and brown-skinned hands using embroidery scissors snip a red thread. Wolfwood holds up Vash's repaired coat, grinning proudly, and does a happy thumbs-up in Vash's direction. Vash lifts his head, seeming distant.

Wolfwood holds out the coat. As Vash puts out his hand to take it, the cloth is replaced so Wolfwood is dropping a sewed-up heart in Vash's hand. Vash rubs the coat against his face with a teary smile. End ID] ID CREDITS

#trigun #trimax #cw blood #vash the stampede #nicholas d. wolfwood #vashwood #my art #his coat as an external representation of his emotional wounds🤌 #a coat riddled with bullet holes tells so many stories #also wolfwood hc of him being good at sewing bc he probably had to patch up many clothes when he was at the orphanage #and now his hands are bloodied but he still has this one thing -this one skill- that helps him make things a little better for once #and it doesnt fix everything but at least he's giving back a bit of the kindness he's being shown #ww actions over words love language *explodes* #i cant stop rotating these thoughts in my head i need to make a comic focused on his pov #image described #thank you for the id!! #raepliica_art

[inkskinned]

crows use tools and like to slide down snowy hills. today we saw a goose with a hurt foot who was kept safe by his flock - before taking off, they waited for him to catch up. there are colors only butterflies see. reindeer are matriarchical. cows have best friends and 4 stomachs and like jazz music. i watched a video recently of an octopus making himself a door out of a coconut shell.

i am a little soft, okay. but sometimes i can't talk either. the world is like fractal light to me, and passes through my skin in tendrils. i feel certain small things like a catapult; i skirt around the big things and somehow arrive in crisis without ever realizing i'm in pain.

in 5th grade we read The Curious Incident of the Dog In The Night-time, which is about a young autistic boy. it is how they introduced us to empathy about neurotypes, which was well-timed: around 10 years old was when i started having my life fully ruined by symptoms. people started noticing.

i wonder if birds can tell if another bird is odd. like the phrase odd duck. i have to believe that all odd ducks are still very much loved by the other normal ducks. i have to believe that, or i will cry.

i remember my 5th grade teacher holding the curious incident up, dazzled by the language written by someone who is neurotypical. my teacher said: "sometimes i want to cut open their mind to know exactly how autistics are thinking. it's just so different! they must see the world so strangely!" later, at 22, in my education classes, we were taught to say a person with autism or a person on the spectrum or neurodivergent. i actually personally kind of like person-first language - it implies the other person is trying to protect me from myself. i know they had to teach themselves that pattern of speech, is all, and it shows they're at least trying. and i was a person first, even if i wasn't good at it.

plants learn information. they must encode data somehow, but where would they store it? when you cut open a sapling, you cannot find the how they think - if they "think" at all. they learn, but do not think. i want to paint that process - i think it would be mostly purple and blue.

the book was not about me, it was about a young boy. his life was patterned into a different set of categories. he did not cry about the tag on his shirt. i remember reading it and saying to myself: i am wrong, and broken, but it isn't in this way. something else is wrong with me instead. later, in that same person-first education class, my teacher would bring up the curious incident and mention that it is now widely panned as being inaccurate and stereotypical. she frowned and said we might not know how a person with autism thinks, but it is unlikely to be expressed in that way. this book was written with the best intentions by a special-ed teacher, but there's some debate as to if somebody who was on the spectrum would be even able to write something like this.

we might not understand it, but crows and ravens have developed their own language. this is also true of whales, dolphins, and many other species. i do not know how a crow thinks, but we do know they can problem solve. (is "thinking" equal to "problem solving"? or is "thinking" data processing? data management?) i do not know how my dog thinks, either, but we "talk" all the same - i know what he is asking for, even if he only asks once.

i am not a dolphin or reindeer or a dog in the nighttime, but i am an odd duck. in the ugly duckling, she grows up and comes home and is beautiful and finds her soulmate. all that ugliness she experienced lives in downy feathers inside of her, staining everything a muted grey. she is beautiful eventually, though, so she is loved. they do not want to cut her open to see how she thinks.

a while ago i got into an argument with a classmate about that weird sia music video about autism. my classmate said she thought it was good to raise awareness. i told her they should have just hired someone else to do it. she said it's not fair to an autistic person to expect them to be able to handle that kind of a thing.

today i saw a goose, and he was limping. i want to be loved like a flock loves a wounded creature: the phrase taken under a wing. which is to say i have always known i am not normal. desperate, mewling - i want to be loved beyond words.

loved beyond thinking.

#spilled ink #writeblr #personal #please don't ask me to talk on my experience on the spectrum lol. i hate how ppl talk to me about it #i really try not to write so specifically about it #bc inevitably someone talks to me like im a child #i think this is the first time i've ever openly identified with it but i've been hinting for years #i might delete this. feels big. #the thing is that being on the spectrum actually IS a spectrum #and if u say ur autistic #inevitably someone makes an assumption about ur needs/symptoms #please do not treat me differently than u usually would. like.... we can tell when you do #and like i mention. i do appreciate the effort. i do truly appreciate the effort. #but it still feels like... #when i was blind. sometimes people kind of did the same-ish thing. #they'd find out i was blind and start talking really loudly? #and while i KNOW they're just trying to help. it would be like. i'd be trying to find #the right way into a building (sometimes only 1 door is unlocked and i couldn't see the signs posted about where to go) #and ppl would be like ''OH UR BLIND? YES SO THIS IS A DOOR. IT OPENS INTO THE BUILDING. IT IS LOCKED NOW." #''A DOOR CAN BE FOUND IN MANY LOCATIONS.'' #and it feels like. when i admit to being autistic #someone comes screeching into my life being like THIS IS A DOOR.

[stil-lindigo]

ashes to ashes.

a short comic about the day Ash was born.

Ash's story

Red and Wolf's story

notes:

--

all my other comics

store

#we love a family with a storied history of loving women and committing mass murder #wolf is a couple years older than she was in her original comic but still just as smitten with red #i dont intend on making it a habit to connect my comics together into a shared universe #but i did make ash with the internal headcanon that she was the kid of red and wolf #if only to justify elements of her design #the gravity defying hair - the control over fire - the commitment to a black/white/red colour scheme #i wont be doing a backstory for snow btw since she's kind of just. a human being who grew up very entitled and spoiled #although maybe during her undead journey she unknowingly comes across her mothers-in-law in the mountains #(they like to live in remote snowy areas) #red would like her #thats all! #thank you for reading #sapphic art #comic art #stillindigo art #hearteaters #stillindigo comics

[egophiliac]

happy new year Ego!!! Just wanted to let you know that I absolutely adore your twst fanart and the tags are just an absolute pleasure to read! You are my greatest inspiration for my personal twst art and I just wanted to thank you for your wonderful masterpieces <333 if possible, may I ask what are some of your headcanons for the diasomnia family? If not for diasomnia then any other characters are fine as well!

thank you, and happy new year! 💚💜💚 that is amazing to hear; it's always a little bewildering but super flattering that other people like my silly little doodles so much!

I don't think I really have any really solid headcanons and also canon keeps validating me left and right (FLUFFY DOMESTIC DIAFAM IS REAL). mostly just kind of...impressions and general thoughts, if that makes sense! lately though I've been kind of obsessed with thinking about Lilia's hair, and specifically when/why he ended up cutting it. (l-look, we're bouncing around the timeline and I gotta make decisions about these things when I draw, it's relevant) (I mean I would probably be weirdly fixated on this anyway, but.)

I think I've settled on the idea that he kept it long until he went to NRC, partly because 1) I like drawing The Ponytail, and 2) I think he thought of NRC as a chance to reinvent himself a bit! he gets to go and be a wacky carefree teenager for a few years and have fun! (officially he's there to keep an eye on Son #1, but how much trouble could he get into, really.) so he gave himself a Cool Teen Haircut to go with his fresh new Cool Teen Persona!

also maybe he had some reflection on his hair's troubled past with three kids...

...and had to weigh his vanity versus the fact that he was going off to be around hundreds of kids on a daily basis, and. the choice suddenly seemed obvious.

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 part 6 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 part 6 spoilers #this is my blog and i'm going to write a million words about lilia and you can't stop me #but anyway i do genuinely get the impression that he's using Pretending to Be a Teenager as a chance to be even sillier than usual #he's a very silly man he's just being EXTRA silly #supported by his recent birthday card where he says he was specifically trying to cast himself as an adorable little brother-type #because he wanted the other students to give him free shit and save him seats and things like that #it worked for about a week before he turned out to be way too good at stuff and everyone just kind of ended up in awe of him instead #and he was like DANGIT. I'VE RUINED IT FOR MYSELF. #(then he and epel went on to talk about their hypothetical vtubersonas because the birthday cards are INSANE but anyway) #i'm bad at headcanons :( sorry! #unless it's dumb things like...what pokemon they would have or whatever #(malleus would have some kind of special fancy-colored dragapult) (but i digress) #i have a hard time putting things into words. just know that i love the grampa bat and his weird kids very much. #my brain is also still kind of fried from the last couple of weeks #i am however starting 2024 off the way i intend to continue it: in deep contemplation of anime hair #(sorry if these look weirdly aliased) (i realized about 3/4 of the way through i was using the wrong brush and i didn't want to restart :U)

[anaxibiaclark]

Steve has a tell when he starts dating someone, which is why Robin always knows when Steve is going on a hot date. There is a cologne that he designates only for date nights. This is how Robin finds out that Steve and Eddie are dating.

"So, who's the lucky lady this time?" Robin asks, leaning over the counter dangling Steve's keys in front of him with a shit eating grin.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Steve responds, rolling his eyes.

Before he can grab for his keys Robin pulls them away. "I know you're going on a hot date because of what you're wearing."

Steve scoffs, trying to grab for his keys again with no luck, watching Robin pocket them in horror.

Robin smirks as she looks him up and down. "You're wearing a Henley tucked into the tightest pair of Levi's you can squeeze that ass into..."

"Jesus, Robin." Steve breaths out, ears turning a shade of pink. "I'm..."

Robin puts up a hand to stop him from speaking even further. "Let me finish." She says smugly. "And to top it off you're wearing Drakkar Noir, which always screams, STEVE HARRINGTON IS GETTING LAID." Robin finishes her sentence with a wide grin, seeing as the pink from his ears has now spread to his entire face making it's way down his neck.

Before either one of them can speak the bell jingles as the door to Family Video opens.

"Come on Harrington," Eddie booms from the open door. "I want to get to the diner before anyone can take our booth."

Steve offers a slow smile to Robin, seeing that her jaw has dropped in pure shock. "Can I have my keys now?"

Still speechless, she digs his keys out of her pocket and places them in Steve's hand.

Just as he's about to pull away she grabs his wrist, "I want details, Harrington."

"In your dreams, Buckley."

#it was a dinner and movie kind of date night #its 1987 in my headcanon so they went to see Hellraiser #i imagine eddie loves clive barker books #was ecstatic to find out The Hellbound Heart was being turned into a movie #and yes #steve did get laid that night #stranger things #steve harrington #eddie munson #robin buckley #steddie #steddie headcanon #its been several months and im still obsessed with these two #drakkar noir #is a lovely cologne