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#and thank you jas ily
f1-birb · 1 month
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the day gets even better 🥹
thank you p1_coach aka Rupert for this
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roachmattea · 2 months
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kal is kind to me
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katebeckets · 3 months
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top 5 tv shows!
fdjaf;aj;f this is what i was talking about when i say "make me have some crises" LOL oh boy okay there's no way I can rank these buuuut
Castle
The Mentalist
Bones
Timeless
Friends
Ask me my top 5 anything!
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allthetorturedpoets · 3 months
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hi beloved!! ok so first off, remember makeup isn’t about covering up your feature but rather enhancing them and expressing yourself!! (i am sure you are gorgeous talia!)
so first thing i recommend to do is find out your face shape, eye shape, and just learn about your features overall. different makeup looks drastically different on you based on these! for example, eyeliner looks can look very different based on if you have a monolid, hooded eyes, etc. so it’s best to do some research on your features to see what kind of looks what suit you best! i also recommend looking up tutorials of people with similar features to you so you can see how certain makeup looks would appear on you and just overall youtube tutorials will be your best friend!!!
next, if you don’t already, please take care of your skin!! skincare is essential to have your makeup looking good and not damaging your skin. you don’t need a super complicated routine at all, just washing your face, a cleanser, toner, serum, and moisturizer will do! but please see what kind of skin type you have, and if your skin needs more than that, feel free to adjust accordingly!
last tip for now is drugstore makeup is so so good and i cant stress this enough!! esp if your just starting out, it’s the best to be able to use affordable makeup! elf, maybelline, covergirl, & loreal are some of my fav brands! please please please check out your local cvs! they have so many good dupes of popular products for the fraction of the price!!
that’s all for now gorgeous! if you have any more specific makeup or fashion related questions feel free to shoot me an ask!! i’ll be more than happy to respond 💗
omg yesss i can’t find a style of eyeliner that looks good on my eyes and i hate it so much. i feel like i have such a skewed perception of my face that i don’t even really know what i look like at this point is that makes sense??
and for my skincare i def need a more powerful moisturizer because one of my acne medications that i got like a year ago still dries out my face So Much (i also have no idea what type of skin i have like dry or oily and now it feels too late to ask anyone because it’s embarrassing that i don’t know)
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Ferris bueller's day off, the lost boys, and drugstore cowboy for the 80s movie asks
hi jas my love!! thank you for the asks <33
ferris bueller’s day off: what’s your guilty pleasure?
watching shitty netflix rom coms like the kissing booth
the lost boys: would you rather be immortal or objectively beautiful to everyone?
objectively beautiful to everyone for sure. living forever sounds so lonely, and i don’t want to go through all of the effort of convincing everyone around me that i’m not immortal (assuming that immortality isn’t a universally acceptable thing in this scenario)
drugstore cowboy: which historical figure most spikes your interest?
probably mary shelley! i love her sm
80s movie asks!
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ramenwithbroccoli · 14 days
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Mam nadzieję, że rozumiesz, jak bardzo się cieszę, gdy pojawiasz się na moim telefonie. Nie mówię tego w dziwny sposób, to jak pies widzący swoją ulubioną zabawkę. To właśnie czuję, będąc twoją wzajemnością.
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damn naprawdę miło to słyszeć. cieszę się że moja obecność tutaj jest trochę pożyteczna, skoro sprawia ci radość :] to jak minięcie się ze starym przyjacielem podczas przechodzenia przez ulicę <3
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emry-stars-art · 3 months
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Children of the Moriyama-Day thrones ✨
I’ve been putting off an explanation for the kingdom Evermore for FOREVER and honestly a lot of it is directly pulled from this post and some more chats with @snazzy-jas-z-is-a-fan-of (thank you ily you’re so smart)
So if you wanna know like 80% of the pre-timeline Moriyama-Day story, read on:
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SO. In Evermore, at least amongst nobility, all importance is placed on direct descendants of family lines. Spouses to the royal family can claim titles if they so choose - the equivalent titles are reserved for that eventuality - but their children will always have higher titles than them (ex: the husbands of the Day line queens are not princes but instead something closer to dukes, while their children will be Day princes and princesses, as well as the reverse for the Moriyama wives). This means that every once in a while, if a spouse would prefer to live privately rather than subject themselves to the more stressful aspects of noble life, they remain only vaguely known by the public. This doesn’t happen often by any means, but it does give the royal family an excuse for why the father of Kevin Day has not made himself known.
Each generation has a shared title - the most fit and capable to rule will take the titles of kings and queens*, while their children are princes and princesses. The eldest of each family in the generation adds “high ___” to their title once a younger sibling is born. This is why even though Kevin is the younger between him and Natalie - the next Day generation - he is the heir to the Day throne because his mother was the elder sister. The names in pink are the highest ranking royalty of their generation, whom the throne is passed to.
*(Maybe Evermore retires their monarchs once they’re unfit to rule, or maybe the younger generations take them by force, thus proving they are fit for the throne. I could see it going either way tbh)
The Moriyama line here is continuing essentially as is usual and expected. There’s family members among each generation and the procession of power is in place. The Day family, on the other hand, has almost entirely crumbled.
Queen Shields left the throne of her own volition, taking her daughter Natalie with her. She left the throne and renounced her Evermore citizenship for reasons unknown to the public, though the Moriyama family brushed it aside as the whims of a young woman that clearly couldn’t handle the lifestyle. For this reason, even if she was to come back to Evermore, she would no longer be able to claim her place among the Day family. Her daughter Natalie Shields, on the other hand, was hardly more than an infant when she was taken, and so the Evermore nobility could not say she renounced her throne or her citizenship by choice. If Princess Natalie ever returned to Evermore and demanded her throne, she would have it.
High Queen Kayleigh, as we all know, has passed away. Her son Prince Kevin was raised beside Ichirou and Riko by the Moriyama family as the sole remaining member of the royal Day line. Though he and Prince Riko had always been close because of their age (High Prince Ichirou was at that age range and just older enough that he found littler kids and especially siblings to be “annoying”, the way kids do), as they grew up, Kevin realized that even if Riko was his best friend and brother, he himself had started agreeing more with Ichirou’s political views and ideas. Riko swallowed the Evermore ideals of “conquer and prosper” as any younger brother might. Kevin and Ichirou never had to fight for the power handed to them - they were beginning to see that those traditions were becoming obsolete, and there were better ways to expand and run a country.
Riko did not like the attention Kevin was suddenly getting from Ichirou.
So when Kevin said, suddenly and surprisingly, that he was going to travel before marriage - see what and who around them might benefit Evermore - no one could really stop him. He was by that point the Day crown. High King Kengo allowed it. (He wouldn’t have, had Ichirou not so strongly championed for the idea.)
Young king Kevin is not technically an Evermore deserter or traitor. The Moriyamas cannot prove that he is. But the longer he stays in Palmetto, the more suspicions arise that he isn’t there only on business, or even that he might never intend to return at all. The only way to take the throne from Kevin - destroying the Day line in Evermore for good - is for him to renounce his throne, or for war to break out between the two countries so that Kevin will be forced to pick a side.
(We know what side he’d pick, of course. His adopted brothers as well. The rest of the Moriyamas are fairly certain they know, and are growing severely impatient for the chance to label him a traitor.)
(This also leads to the idea that perhaps, if she found her way back to Evemore on an errand, all the lost princess Natalie would have to do is exchange her claim to the throne for a certain foreign prisoner’s freedom. Ichirou is always looking for ways to get rid of competition, and Riko’s lost plaything is not his to worry about. Kengo’s declining health makes it easy for Ichirou to pass off his word as the High King’s.
So the ex-princess is free to take Jean Moreau wherever he’d like to go. Or, when he says he doesn’t know, wherever she thinks is suitable.)
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chorizoa · 7 months
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entrail of faith — könig x reader
i have not properly written a fic or a snippet in so long, and I am physically aching to do so :3 plus, been obsessed with this man for like 3 months straight and it is NOT letting up— so, let me be indulgent, and nasty, and vile, and awesome while I cook up literary genius. (pls do not read my stuff if ur a minor ily mwah)
i hope u like :3 (cuz if u do I'm writing more)
cw: mentions of sex, force, and kidnapping, reader is mostly oblivious, Konig is just nasty and I'm shameless about it
synopsis(sorta): König has been a little crazy stalker, and you finally get close enough for him to make a move
———————————————————————
Konig was a good man, a routine man. His mother and grandmother had beaten manners into him, and daddy had his face shoved into a bible every Sunday morning. Everything was intentional, down to the way he stored his razors, all the way deep down to the way he shamefully ruts into his calloused palm each night. It all mattered— obsessively mattered.
Konig was a good man, a strong man. He tried so hard to keep his thoughts pure, be gentle with himself and others— lumbering about as if he were an animal latched to a ball and chain, a monster in the eyes of rookies and civilians alike— but he tried.
He can kill a man in less than ten seconds without a weapon, five with. He can dismember a corpse, and make someone seem as if they had never existed to begin with— he isn't a man of softness, he isn't a man who deserves a gentle hand, only his own thick mits that've been stained with decades of blood.
He wasn't  a man of softness—until he saw you. Effortless you. With your smile, the flowery trail of scent that tickled his nose in your wake, those fucking eyes— Konig tried to be a good man, but he wanted to so badly see them glossed over, heavy with arousal and desperation. How they'd roll when he—
Konig tried to be a good man.
— Sir? Are you ready to order?
Scheiße. Those eyes again, the way they fluttered— it was almost enough to distract him from the way that dingy little waitress get-up clung to your all-encompassing frame— and hearing the word sir  so obediently drip from your swelled lips made his cock twitch in his pants. Thank God he'd opted for the cargos today, and thank him again because you were such a good girl, you'd never peek.
Not that you'd have a chance, he loomed over you even at seated height— forcing your eyes up to meet his, seeming just much too big for the booth he shoved himself in— but, he was still shameless in the way his eyes roamed over you. At least you had the assurance he'd tip well.
— Ah- Ja, sorry Kätzen..
He cleared his throat, nervously tugging at the lip of his black surgical mask, his eyes darting about behind thick sunglasses. You're so pretty— what was he doing again? Ah, right, food. He wasn't hungry, not for anything they had here, except for you— but that wouldn't be a suitable answer, no, not for a precious little thing like you.
He could practically taste the aura that rolled off of you, you were no whore.
— Coffee- black, please. If it's not too much trouble.
Of course it wasn't too much trouble, it was your job. He was cursing himself internally, saying such stupid things to such a lovely girl. It would be easier if you were stuffed with his girth already, crying and spluttering as you struggled to fit him properly— he wouldn't say stupid shit then, but then you giggle- oh, fuck, you giggle and all the sudden he needs a freezing cold shower.
— Of course not, sir, will that be all?
Sweet girl, you should know not to smile at a man like that. Not a man like him, especially when his mind is full of bending you over this table and ruining that pretty head of yours.
— Yes, thank you, schätzchen.
He hoped you didn't know German, he hoped you were oblivious enough to let the way he was ripping your clothes to shred with his eyes go unnoticed— and of course, because you're such a good girl, it did.
— My pleasure- I'll be back in just a moment.
You are so polite, so sweet and efficient. He'd been watching you for a time now, the way you'd bustle about the café, being so kind even when majority of the creatures in here didn't deserve your time of day, not like he did— no, not anything like he did.
If he had it his way, you'd never work again. He'd throw money at you like it was a religion, give you all the codes and numbers to every bank account in his name— let you go on a spending spree, spoil you with fine lace and even better food. KorTac paid him enough, and he didn't spend a dime unless he needed something— unless he was indulging in you.
If he had it his way, you'd be dumb and obedient, you'd placate yourself to being his sweet little toy— and, oh, how he'd reward you for it. He'd keep you full of his seed, and happy with whatever object caught your affections, he'd build a goddamn castle for you. He'd never deny you a thing, as long as you kept looking at him like the most important person to exist— even if you were just doing your job.
— Your coffee, sir— oh, and careful, I just had them brew it.
Oh, you're such a darling. Fresh coffee? Just for him? You might as well give him your ring size now, he hopes you want kids.
— Lovely, Schatz, thank you.
— Of course, enjoy.
He almost felt crestfallen as you placed the bill next to him, and sauntered away, but your swaying hips could heal even the most shattered bones. Angels above, you were such a perfect thing— so innocent and lovely, you'd need to be protected, you'd need to be saved.
The heat of the coffee was nothing compared to the widely gaped blood vessels under his skin— breath threatening to catch everything he got a glimpse of you traipsing about. He had to make sure you were well distracted every time he dove in for a sip, you couldn't see his face, not yet.
If he were a better man, a more confident man, he'd leave you his number. He'd clean himself up, start a good conversation with you— take you to a fine dinner, even though he so hated the idea of something so insanely public. If he were half the man he held himself as, he wouldn't be salivating over you in an empty corner of the café.
Konig tried to be a good man, but he was slimy. He was a pervert, a danger— he'd never harm anyone— save for the men whose blood stained his hands, but he'd found himself craving indulgence in dark fantasies more than once. He was nasty, he was a monster, but he wanted to be soft for you. Simply, he wanted you, but his therapist would strongly advise against it— counseling that maybe, just maybe it's not best for his obsessive psyche.
Whatever, you'd learn to love it.
He had his reluctant fill of ogling, the tightening of his pants becoming too much to ignore, and the clatter of dishes becoming grating on his sensitive ears— he had to leave at some point. His coffee cup had long run dry, and he hadn't had the courage to waive you over for another.
If he were a better man, he'd leave you his number, but a crisp hundred to cover the bill— and leave you a tip to keep you fed— would definitely suffice. He tucked it under his coffee mug shamefully, wishing he just had the sack to speak to you— but that irritating fear of rejection always held him just at arms length.
How badly he wished he could just take you.
Everything else that wasn't you was boring, the streets were dull and gray, and rain drizzled like piss— just another way for God to mock him, punishment for his lustful behavior. Father would have a field day with him, if only he knew.
He stuffed his hands in the pocket of his soft-shell coat, rain pattering against it in an almost melodic sound. Nothing like your voice, though, oh nothing like that sound.
— Sir!
See, nothing like it, and he can't stop imagining it.
— Sir, you forgot your phone!
Oh, oh, he's not imagining that.
He whips around almost too fast, seeing you skirt on your heels as you stop your quick advance in front of him— his phone outstretched in a waiting hand. You really were such a lovely thing.
— Oh! Gott.. thank you, liebling— would have lost my head.
He wished he sounded.. cooler, smoother. But, he sounded like an inexperienced teen, stuck in a giants body. Always cringing at the sound of his own voice, but you smile and his world just fucking shifts— he couldn't give a shit how he sounded.
— it's- it's no worry, sir, I understand that.
Oh, your laugh, it's so sweet. He wants to touch you, grab you and squeeze you.
— I wanted to thank you actually- for the tip, I mean.. that was very generous of you—..?
You pause, trailing off as you look up at him. You want something, oh what is it maus? Anything. Say it, tell him— Oh, you want his name. His name. He has to fight the grin on his face.
— König— and do not worry yourself, Maus, it is no trouble. You work hard.
Now he's nonchalant, now he's found his groove. Keep being so humble, keep pretending like you don't want him to shower you in his endless wealth; keep looking up at him with those eyes that would be so much prettier coated in tears as you gagged on his thickness.
— Well, regardless, thank you, König.
Fuck, the way those pretty lips move with the pronunciation of his name— and you didn't miss a single vowel, what a good girl, what a smart girl. Oh, how he wanted to praise you like the good puppy you are, a collar with his name attached would be so pretty on you.
— Truly, Schatz, don't mention it— but, uhm-
Ah, he trailed, his fingers fidgeting with the lint of his pocket. Did he say it? Did he go for it? Either she'd be creeped, and run, or she'd be flattered— maybe even accepting. He had to keep it black and white, or he'd explode.
— Do you mind if I give you my number, liebling? I'd uh- I'd very much like to see you.. more.
Oh, he sounded like a fucking fool, and you looked so cute and patient; he was so used to drunken one-night stands, or shooting blanks into his hand when one just wasn't enough— this was so much harder when you looked like a literal angel to him, and not some cheap bimbo.
So patient, he wondered if you'd be like that while he railed you— even when you couldn't take it anymore. You were blushing, and he wanted to add tears to it, you were nervously fidgeting with your fingers, and he imagined them around his cock.
— Not at all, sir..
Today's a beautiful day. A lovely day even, the clouds had split just for him to bask in the loveliness of heaven's light— you sweet angel, you had no idea what you'd signed yourself up for.
— Perfekt. Hand me your phone, little one.
And you did, almost eagerly, such a good girl already. Following his orders so nicely, of course you did, even unlocking it before you passed it over.
His fingers never felt so nimble over a touchscreen, typing in his contact as if it were as easy as breathing— you seemed so shy, so nervous, it only made him confident. You made him confident, and he couldn't get enough.
— There you are, send me a text later, hm?
He hands the phone back grinning, he'd reward her for being so compliant— maybe work her open on his fingers just for now, a window of opportunity was wide open for him, and you were blushing all innocent and star-struck in front of him. He could not wait to ruin you.
— Yes, sir- König.. I'll do that. See you later!
— See you, maus.
Oh, you're so cute. You're so shy and it letting him read you like a filthy book. He knew you hadn't been taken care of, he knew you desperately needed satisfaction— and he'd give it to you tenfold, a sweet little thing like you deserved it. Especially since you did such a good job of hiding it behind that precious little smile.
Those eyes, they told him everything.
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pt.2 :3
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skeelly · 3 months
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who are your fav mutuals and why?
tbh, i ignore these kinds asks as much as i can because i'm scared I'll offend someone by not putting them BUT I'll do it lol
heres like, my main mutuals that i love more than the boy i met in the comp
(IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER, I SWEAR)
@melodydepp (lol idk if it mentioned you) ml fr. so book coded i can't. also the most amazing human to ever walk planet earth, likeee???
@gergthecat HEY POOKIE. finally, a person who has the same or at least close humor as me and understands my jokes. youre the best fr. alsssoo, not to mention, you are EQUALLY as weird as me? like what a blessing (YOURE the blessing)
@mqstermindswift MY MAIN GIRL ILYYYYYY. LITERALLY ONE OF THE FEW PEOPLE KEEPING ME SANE LMFAO
@urbanflorals how do i introduce such important person in my life?? that's hard. but EM ILY. i physically cannot explain how special you are
@yourtwistedlies WOMAN YOU ARE BETTER THAN ALL THE MEN I KNOW. MARRY ME (platonically)
@sophiesonlinediary HEY SOPHIEEEEEEEE. i think we both know why you're here. you have taught me that making decisions is hard and i thank you for that (but fr, thank you for making sure i remember that something is stupid). also, what's up with the apartment??
@nqds NADSSSSSSSSSSS AAAAAH. IDEK WHAT TO SAY BUT AAAAHHHH. ILY. STAY FUNNY PLEASE
@reminiscentreader hiiii jassssssssssssssssssss. do I need to explain? jas = happy, good life. you're the best
@myster3y come back i miss you too much i don't think my mind can function correctly anymore
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elmo-keep · 5 months
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☆ ALI'S 2023 END-OF-YEAR APPRECIATION POST !!!
hi friends!!! i just wanted to do a little thing where i thank my friends for being my friends and helping make my year brighter!! this is loosely inspired by @mirxzii!
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Firstly, thanks soo much to all my mutuals and followers and everyone else I've had positive interactions with this year on here :)
I'd also like to take a moment and thank all my friends who made my year:
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☆ OLIVE | @jewishruthfleming
↳ hiii ilysmmm you've been such a great friend to me and i'm soo grateful you're my friend. thanks for putting up with me and my hyperfixations which are completely different from yours, thanks for listening to my rambles abt alex wilder. you have literally been one of the best parts of my year, and i wanted to make sure you knew that so
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☆ NOOR | @kohinoors
↳ noor omg first off hi. i hope this is year is soo good to you. you are one of the coolest people i've ever met. even though neither of us like the same things anymore, i still love you soo much, and im so glad you think i'm cool enough to be your friend 🥺 you're like my cool big cousin, ilysmm
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☆ LUNA | @mexicancokewannabe
↳ LUNA BBG HII, literally ilsym. ty for always being there for me and always cheering me up when i'm sad and making me laugh, and making sure ik to sleep. you're such a sweet, fun person and my life is better bc of you 🦐🦐
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☆ MARTY | @vidnasty
↳ marty, i hope you know i think you're like the coolest person ever. even though we don't talk much anymore, i still love you so much, tysm for making me laugh and smile and cry (with your angst posts and fic ideas)! i hope you have a wonderful 2024!!!
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☆ ROXIE | @mirxzii
↳ roxiee i love you just as much now as i did during our encanto phases, even though we don't talk much or have the same interests, i still enjoy seeing your posts on my dash, and i hope you have a lovely year, hon ^_^
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☆ IZZY | @luckynature
↳ izzy!! ilysmmm you are so sweet and cool, and i'm so happy seeing you get the love you deserve this year, (and hitting almost? 1k followers), like congrats babes, you deserve it!!! your ideas and concepts for characters whether oc or existing are always so amazing, like you literally are soo creative omg. you're like the mirabel to my isabela, ilysm have a great year!!
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☆ JUNO | @madwickedawesome
↳ juno u r literally so poggers. omg ilyy ur soo cool and have such great taste. and THANK you for introducing me to lacrimosa. life changing frr alshskk anyway ily!!!
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☆ JAS | @isitovrnow
↳ jas, you're such an angel, thank you sooo much for being my friend!!! you're such a kind, beautiful soul omg, i hope this year is kinder to you, ily
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☆ VARI | @mapsareforbraindeads
↳ niaaa ilysm you are such an amazing writer, and you're so cool. like omg, ilysm i hope you have a great year and i hope life is kinder to you
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☆ ASH | @the-wank-shank
↳ you are like omg. you are so cool, you are also like a big cousin to me!!! your humour is so funny, and your art is so poggers. ily hug!!
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☆ AERON | @lanawinterscigarettes
↳ MY big bro!!! i love seeing you spam my notifs, its like my little way of knowing your online lol, your such a bright person you always make me smile whenever we talk ilysmmm
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☆ AMI | @foxboy-light-yagami
↳ ami you are so funny, your vibes are immaculate, and i love being correct abt light yagami with you. you are literally such a joy and ilysm
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☆ IZZIE | @hateful1979
↳ izzie!!! you are such a lovely person, and have such banger taste omggg i love you so much you're such a delight
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☆ ACHILLES | @nibblelinephym
↳ achilles you are so poggers!!! ilysmm ty for being my friend! you're so nice and always brighten the dash
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☆ CLOUD | @sillysnack
↳ CLOUDDD!!!! YOU ARE ONE OF my favourite ppl omg, you're such a lovely, sweet person ^_^ we've been friends since jan 2022 with our encanto phases (2 YEARS!!) AND i can't wait for another 2 years and beyond omg ilysm i can't put in words hi
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☆ SOPHIE | @larsgoingtomars
↳ sophie, you're amazing and i love you so much!! your such a lovely person and i love talking to you, you're such a great friend ilysm
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And a special mention to all my friends and mutuals who've deactivated- Asha, Envy, Oli, El, Deus, and everyone else, I still love you so much and I hope that you're okay <3
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HAPPY NEW YEARS, EVERYBODY, HERE'S TO A GREAT 2024!!!
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DOMINATION LINES!!
THANK YOU @caramelcheesegay FOR COMING UP WITH 90% OF THESE, ILY<333
DOMINATED:
Scout:
-“Can’t stun me if you can’t hit me! I’m a freakin’ blur, dipshit!”
-“I am ALWAYS gonna dodge that. When will you LEARN, man?”
-“Oh, oh, oh! I’m STUNNED at how bad you’re doin’!”
Soldier:
-“Don’t swing your puny stick at me, maggot! You come from fake America!!!”
-“I AM IMPERVIOUS TO ALL OF YOUR ATTACKS, SYRUP-SLURPER!”
-“Get off the battlefield and go play some hockey, weakling!”
Demo:
-“Aye, I bet you thought it’d be easy ta kill me, didn’t’che? Well, iaarrghhnnn *snore*.”
-“You call tha’ a grenade?? Me blind Mum farts worse than that wee thing!” 
-“Don’ come a’ me in those ghoulish boots lad, I’ll blast ‘em right offa yer feet!” 
Engie:
-“You’re just a little piece a’ sentry fodder now, aren’t’cha?”
-“You make for some real shitty target practice, son.”
-“Tell me ‘bout those stun grenades sometime, yeah?”
Heavy:
-“Ha! Leetle bug man is crushed. Like bug. Leetle bug. Feed you to Archimedes, Buggy.”
-“Small jumpy man- not Scout? There are two small jumpy men???”
-“You think loud noise and bright light are enough to take down Heavy??? I am killing you now!!”
Medic:
-“Oohoo! Free organs! Young, too!”
-“Ach, that reminds me- I need to feed my birds.”
-“Ohhh, sorry little boy! Go play with your crayons, ja?”
Sniper:
-“Piss off, y’ jumpy git. Bloody grasshopper…”
-“Awh, get quicker next time, won’tcha?” 
-“Dead like a ‘roo on the side o’ the road!”
Spy:
-“For someone named ‘The Rogue’, you are certainly a pack thinker.”
-“Oho! I am *stunned* by your lack of skill!”
-“Not so *Dexx*trous now, hm?”
DOMINATING:
Scout: 
-“No runnin’ in the halls, freshman!”
-“Bonk? More like thonk, eh? ‘Cause that’s the sound your hollow head makes when I hit ya!” 
-“Hah! Too slow!” 
Soldier: 
-“Y'know, a 3" piece of rubber can do a lotta damage, Trench Monkey!”
-“Hah! Oh, I mean- I'm sooo soooorey aboot tha', Bud! (snicker)”
-“A cat on a sloped roof is braver than the entire U.S. Military, Booklicker!” 
Pyro: 
-“Ack! Sorry, Firecracker!” 
-“Oh shit, I think I’m still on fire. Damn it, these were my favorite pants!” 
-“Hey we're, uh, still on for s'mores later... right?”
Demo:
-“Pen's mightier than the sword, cyclops! Get it? 'Cause I'm an artist and you- yeah, nevermind”
-“Someone must have put a little sleepy sauce in your mickeys, bud, ‘cause you are NOT on top of it today!” 
-“Smile and wait for the flash!” 
Heavy:
-“Somebody order ten thousand pounds a’ dead weight? (Snort)” 
-“It’s really hard to miss your pressure points, y’know.” 
-“Move it, ya big lug! You’re in the way!” 
Engineer: 
-“GRENAAAAAADE! I WIN! Ya proud of me, da-uhhh.. dude?” 
-“See ya round, Daaaeengie! I said Engie. Short for Engineer. That is you. You are- I’ll go.” 
-“Bam! And another one down, and another one down! ANOTHER ONE BITES THE BO STAFF!!” 
Medic: 
-“oohohoh, Maybe I can try some experiments on you this time!- Y'know, put your lessons to good use!”
-“Doc, you seriously gotta take care of your health. Damn hypocrite... (Mocking voice) 'Do az I say, not az I do!' my ass!”
-“Guess that's what happens when you don't follow your own advice, thanks for the hands-on lesson!”
Sniper:
-“There, away from the noise now! Just how you like it, Dee!”
-“You may wink at your opponents, but ya gotta take the shot as well, y'know! Can't charm 'em to death!”
-“I just... un-cozied your... camper. I'm having a bad day please be nice.”
Spy:
-“Crisse de connard! -Aheh, not used to gettin' berated in your own language, eh?”
-“Va te faire foutre, merde de con!”
-“Bein Tabarnak, it feels good to turn the tables! Hah, deserved!”
Taunt ideas:
-Using the Bo-Staff as a microphone
-Using the bo-staff as a rifle(making fun of sniper)
-Juggling the stun grenades, almost dropping one and catching it in time before glancing around to see if anyone saw him and putting them away again
OCS:
DOMINATED:
Strat (@emotionally-stressed-strategist):
-“How are you this bad? I’m dominating you with a PEN, Rogue, A PEN.” 
-“Rock, skull. Man down.” 
-“One less dot on the map- don’t come back, yeah?”
Arrow (@emotionally-dead-archer):
-"Hah! Gotcha! Oh, gotta love a little sibling rivalry, am I right?"
-“Bigger sibling? Not really.”
-“Hey! My aim is getting better! Thanks for the target practice!”
DOMINATING:
Strat:
-“I’m done bein’ your wingman if you keep this up.”
-“That’s what happens when you steal my art supplies!”
-“How do you still not have ink poisoning? Dude, seriously.”
Arrow:
-“There! I make for a pretty good role model! You get to see my stuff first-hand!”
-“You're adopted. Sorry.”
-“I think it's almost bedtime, kiddo.”
Jet (@emotionally-broken-robot):
-"Hey, uh, does this count as Softwaregore?"
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jas i'm sorry that i'm in your inbox like this but ive decided that you are very awesome and we need to be friends more so. thats all. anyway hi jas its amelie how are you
please never apologize for being in my inbox i actually love you so much your like my comfort blog thank you for being in my inbox ily
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nqds · 5 months
Text
@reminiscentreader
dear jas, 
ill never stop talking or saying how much ily bc i just truly do. you understand in a way none of my f2f friends would ever so thank you so much, now im gonna ramble on why ill never stop loving you.
okay, first of all, ur personality - ur literally so loving, so caring, so funny, like if you dont think that then idk if ur sane or not. like imagine having someone that care that much for you, that cares sm abt you that they ask ‘ hru today? ‘ never had anyone do that. ‘ here ur daily affirmation ‘ never had anyone do that either. 
how gorgeous you are? like table- ur pretty hazel eyes are just so so so sweet like i could srsly look forward to staring at those all the time. and ur hair, i love the light brown shade of it so much, it reminds me of like- a latte, like the surface yk??? and i love lattes but ilym, always.
anyways, i just giggle every time i wake up and scroll to my notifs to find you spamming my posts or commenting or messaging me, it seriously always brings a smile to my face. 
heres some lyrics i think describe you to me at the fullest ; 
Everybody knows I love you so, so, so, so much
'Cause every time they ask, I always tell, tell, tell, tell them
That's my fuckin' best friend, that's my fuckin' right hand
That's my fuckin' throw-up-in-the-bathroom-but-still-love-them
That's my fuckin' best friend, best friend
That's my fuckin' best friend, best friend
That's my fuckin' lifeline, that's my ride or die like
best friend by conan gray
It's nice to have a friend
(Ooh)
It's nice to have a friend
(Ooh)
its nice to have a friend by taylor swift
but anyways, id do so so much for you, literally. every single day, without a beat, wherever and whenever, i think abt you. always, i love you so much for who you are, and you deserve that, even if i dont deserve that nor you. just know i love you form the deepest depths my heart could go, always and forever, until i die and from my grave. i love you <3
youll always and forever be my best friend jas, no matter what. even if i disappear off the face of earth, youll always still be my table, my silly willy little table, jas <3
i totally didnt write this in ur loveless draft bc i was too lazy to open up another doc
and if i receive hate or cringe shit abt this i will hunt you down <3
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Top 5 mash episodes (so far)
hi jas my darling!! this was sooo difficult, but it was fun to look at all of the episodes i’ve seen so far!! also these are in no particular order
tuttle (1.15)
carry on, hawkeye (2.11)
hot lips and the empty arms (2.14)
crisis (2.21)
alcoholics unanimous (3.9)
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weirdcat1213 · 10 months
Text
fuck
here we go
vol 10 thoughts
chap 1:
-IMIMIMIM NOT READY FOR THISSSS
-nooo dont make me read it, im too broken already
-NOOOO SHUT UPPPPPP
-delusion oh dear geesus
-DONT ASK THAT WHY WOULD ASK THAT :C
-stfu wolfwood please, ik you love him and admire him but stfu pls
-huh
-oh right....this is how...yeap
-please leave wolfwood just fucking leave
-although yeah thats interesting, im not sure if he thought vash or someone would come for him but yeah, if he actually thought that was the end he would have taken the vials...hmmm
-or maybe not. maybe he was ready to defend the orphanage and be done with it
-ouch
chap 2:
-HE TOOK NO DISCIPLE THAT WAS KIDNAPPING BASICALLY FUCK YOU
-livio ill say this with love....rn i do not fucking care about your self worth/attachment issues. he can go to hell, he and his stupid fucking gun
-OH NO THE CHILDREN
-LMAO HER PLAN WAS GOOD AND THE CHILDREN WERE LIKE "YEAH NO"
-go to FUCKING HELL CHAPEL SHUT UUUUP
-SHUT UP YOU KNOW HES SENSITIVE ABOUT THAAAAAT
-FUCKER
-well this is fucked this is so fucked (may i remind the people this is my 2nd reading)
-ah yey, the tears are here
-"we could have done this as a team" then WHY DID YOU LEAVE YOU FUCKING DUMBASS. NOW YOURE IN THIS FUCKING PAINFUL AND STUPID POSITION. YOU KNOW WHATS SHES FUCKING RIGHT, YOU NEVER LISTENED TO HER NOR VASH AND WENT TO DO SHIT ON YOUR OWN, AND NOW YOURE HERE. YOU AND YOUR FUCKING NEED OF DOING EVERYTHING ALONE CUZ THATS WHAT YOU HAVE BEEN DOING FOR YEARS. YOU CARRIED YOUR LONELINESS FOR YEARS, BUT YOU ARE ABOUT TO REALIZE YOU WERE NEVER ALONE, BUT ITS TOO LATE NOW ISNT IT??? YOU PRECIOUS STUPID DUMBASSS
-this is literally where the fun ends (kinda)
-OH THANK GOD YOURE FUCKING HERE FINALLY
-oh this is when i start to cry like a baby oh geesus
chap 3:
-WHY DO YOU THINK HE CAME YOU DUMBASSSSSSSSSSSSS (ily)
-wolfwood i fucking swear-
-razlo can you not, youre scaring the children, the readers and me
-also the ultimate pacifist vs the ultimate "what if i make a hole in your head for funsies"
-silly me thought the 1st time"oh vash is here so literally nothing can happen"....ja
-yeap, theres also that
-if the book club survives this i would love to buy everyone virtual drinks actually. the people who dont drink can have a nice lemonade
-SPIN THAT FUCKER WOLFWOOD :D
-NOT THEM NOT TRUSTING HIS ANGEL ARM PLSSSS
-"im a friend of nicholas" i may throw up out of sadness
-oh thats cruel for you? really?
-good fucking riddance old man
-razlo stop i dont want to sympathize with you rn
-VASH QUICK DO SOMETHING-
-THE ULTIMATE FIGHTING COUPLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
-"they switched to fighting as a team" im gonna eat glass
-i love how this chapter ends. thanks for the goofy moment before you pluck my heart out in front of my eyes, nightow
-also if you dont see how thats the face of someone trying to confess something really important but failing idk what to tell you
chap 4:
-"death omen" SHUT UP NIGHTOW
-YOU FUCKING DUMBASS
-AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH :c
-[side note but if orange animates this is gonna hurt like HELL cuz they have highlighted a lot wolfwood's thing with survival so...yeah]
-STOP MAKING YOUR HUSBAND SAAAAAAAAD
-oh...oh no
-HE SAID THE THING HE SAID THE THING NOW SHUT IT
-THE FUCKING. FUCKING. TOUCH
-OW
-those fucking eyes damn hes pissed
-OW RIGHT, HIS NOSE...AH
-oh..oh honey no pls dont leave pls dont leave him alone ik you understand whats gonna happen but please dont please come back-
-oh that blank panel, oh geesus
-YA BRATTTTT
-FUCK OFF RAZLO AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH
chap 5:
-i dont get much about this fight ngl
-razlo's eye is so cool but also FUCK OFFFFFFF
-FASTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER
-OHOHOHOH YEAH LETS GO LETS HIT IT
-DAMN
-PUNCH IN THE FACE BITCH
chap 6:
-not the...not the fucking parallel with vash and razlo....nightow why
-HAHGSYU NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO THE BLOOD
-wait what-
-VASH TO THE RESCUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
-nononononononNONONONONO NO
-right right, i fell for it again
-THATS IT WE WIN- AH NO SHIT FUCK
-i told you he was a cunt razlo
-oh shit thats, thats beautiful
-i dont mean this as a negative thing against nightow/the story...BUT DID LIVIO'S FUCKING IDEA HAD TO BE THIS FUCKING LATE????? YOU ARE FUCKING WITH ME
-yey...hes back
chap 7
-for the love of geesus pls dont make me read this
-this is more from a personal standpoint but it makes me so fucking sad he felt guilty at the idea of going back to the orphanage cuz no matter what that was always his home, a place he could have come back to. not everyone has one of those. but alas, now its too late
-.....no. he doesnt care that you are a killer or that you have one of the coins, that you were gonna betray him anytime. he doesnt care wolfwood so fucking stop trying to be the villain here.
-ik fucking know why wolfwood doesnt wanna go....but fucking damn it
-this chapter is so quiet. the 1st time i was listening to mr bluesky but the chapter's lack of music just fits.
-maybe YOU are alright but im not. ill never be alright with this
-when i get my own place im not buying a couch and thats a promise
-"smile needle noggin" [crying pause]
-IF I DONT TURN THE PAGE I DONT HAVE TO SEE IT IF I DONT TURN THE PAGE I DONT HAVE TO SEE IT IF I DONT TURN THE PAGE I DONT HAVE TO SEE IT IF I DONT TURN THE PAGE I DONT HAVE TO SEE IT IF I DONT TURN THE PAGE I DONT HAVE TO SEE IT
-god literally has never made vash any favors ever and the ONE TIME he needed someone bigger than everything else...nothing happened
-"and we can celebrate" WHY DID NIGHTOW PAINTED HIS FUCKING DEATH LIKE A CELEBRATION??? YES, HE GETS HIS FREEDOM BACK, HE GETS TO GO HOME, TO SEE HIS FAMILY, TO SHARE A DRINK WITH HIS SOULMATE BUT I CANT STAND IT I CANT
-ofc you did, wolfwood has never been good at lying
-and there it is, til death do them part as they say idk
-...............................................................................................................
chap 8
-im gonna eat my hand, glass, my computer, my house, the world-
-so...do we think that grave was just laying around or...
-DONT YOU FUCKING ASK THAT (IKIKIKIK BUT STILL, LIKE LOOK AT VASH'S EYES HE GETS IT)
-CALL ME STUPID BUT I GENUIENLY FORGOT ABOUT THE HAIR
-literally "stay away from him asshole"
-imagine knowing for a fact you broke something really important inside your brother and laughing about it
-baby oh my baby your hair, your little and stupid blond hair
-orange you have hinted at this so many times and let me tell you one thing, if you do it it has to hurt in the best way possible because this scene deserves nothing but the best
-i respect and wonder how nightow is so good at comic relief. its still a sad scene, everything fucking hurts, the reader will never be the same again...but he can put bits and pieces of comedy that make you chuckle or at least smile to then continue to hit you with a bat
-NOT THE JESUS ALLEGORY CARRYING A FUCKING CROSS, go to hell nightow
-and thats his cross?....to survive?????? im dead
-oh so he doesnt take it? ngl after this my first reading turned into a blur, god knows what i was thinking
im..........yeah. i fucking hated that, as i thought i would
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stardew-shitposterino · 11 months
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WAIT NO CUTE CAN I GO FIRST
Personality:
-bit of an introvert (agoraphobia is strong with me 😅)
-pretty happy most of the time!! I try to be as optimistic as I can be
-that being said of course sometimes I crash really hard and just need a few days to get myself back into that happy mindset
-people pleaser, but not in the sense that I have no boundaries. I just really enjoy seeing people happy with life and if I can help bring some of that happiness to them, I will!!
-actually extremely insecure which makes me recluse
-more of a couch potato, sure I like to be outside and stuff but I’m not much of a hiker. I’d rather lay on a blanket outside n watch the clouds or something
Likes/interests:
-pink. Anything stereotypical “girly girl” (I hate overly gendered stuff but it’s the best way to explain it. Glitter!!! Pink!! Butterflies!!! Flowers!!! All of that stuff
-this doesn’t usually reflect in my style though because I v much am a drabby tshirt and sweatpants person 😭
-that being said I also DO love dresses!! Like a lot, just not super short ones. I feel like I’m too exposed 😭
-I v much do art, I like to read but I’m not HUGE into it. Prefer to read manga over novels for sure
-unfortunately a weeb
-cats!!!
-my fav foods are queso, Alfredo, and any kind of soggy rice 😅
-I prefer psychological thriller kind of movies that make your head hurt!!!!
-dnd/Sanrio/care bears/ I FUCKING LOVE COWS
-I’m also just about in my late 20s but idk if that’s an interest at all? 😅
-and obviously video games, but stardew is actually the only ‘cozy/life simulator’ game I’ve ever played. More into Zelda and assassins creed :)
I think that’s it :) I’m bisexual so I will be happy with a Bachelor and bachelorette!!
Ily thank u for taking ur time to do this 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻
Oooh my first one ! This one is a bit tricky as I can see multiple matches for different reasons 👀 I’ll go with my gut feeling:
-Shane:
- I’m torn on him because there is a possibility of you two not being good for each other as you share some traits, but it could also be a possibility for you two to come to terms with your struggles (like insecurities) and find an open ear in one another.
-You both are homebodies and like similar kinds of food :D I could see you both ordering takeout and watching some new thriller that just released.
-Your more happy-mindset would also be a nice contrast to his more pessimistic outlook on life, but your “off-days” would show him that it’s ok to not always be 100% positive.
-He thinks you look so cute when you doll up and get all euphoric at your new clothes. Your interest in Sanrio would also be a good base for you and Jas to get along, two women in his life that mean a lot to him.
-he would be SO DOWN to play Tears of the Kingdom with you. Of course it’s a single player game, but just sitting next to each other and helping one-another out doing the quests on their respective switch, or just watching the other play and laugh at whatever stupid shit they can come up with instead of playing the main story hehehe.
-he likes chickens, you like cows, you two share a fondness of a cute farm animal, and it helps a ton with building up that relationship as you two like talking to them, or about them with each other.
-Abigail:
-It’s pretty clear why I chose her. She is a gamer, she loves adventures, she’s an introvert.
-you’re more a homebody, she’s kind of something in-between. You both can spend lazy Sundays together playing video games or you can go outside and wander around in nature or do something fun (if your agoraphobia allows it of course)
-the girl eats rocks…it’s save to say she’s more than happy to eat anything with you, so if you wanna eat rice or pasta every day, so be it.
-she’s not a girly girl, but I think she’d love to dye your hair at least once! You like pink, so why not get some colour in there that matches some of the dresses you wish you wore more often?
-I’m not sure whether she’d be a weeb, but she’d never say no to watching a Shonen anime with you, or even read the manga 👀
-Sebastian:
-why? He’s a nerd, he likes to be inside and play video games and code as his job.
-He’s an introvert like you, so he’d understand when you want to log off and be alone for a bit.
-You could watch movies together ! I HC that he isn’t that much into movies, but once he gets into it, he is very invested, so it could still work out !
-if you draw (because you said you do art), he’d be more than happy if you made some character models for the game he’s working on, or for his discord server etc. he isn’t the artsy type, so he’s more than impressed you are able to cook something up that looks incredible !
-he wouldn’t want to hike with you lmfao 😭 but he’d want to ride on his motorcycle with you, if you want to. Some adventure, but not too much physical activity, yet a lot of fun.
-He’s a weeb, your honour, I feel it in my bones. Do I have to say more ?
——————————————————————————
-all of them seem to be cat people (Shane might be a dog person, but for our sake I say he’s a chicken person and likes both cats and dogs alike, but chickens win) , so that’s also a plus for all :3
I hope you can sort of agree with my picks. Im sorry if I didn’t pick anyone you have hoped for, but I think these 3 are the best matches out of all the marriage candidates. I thought of maybe Leah, but your interest in art would be about one of the few things you’d have in common I fear. I think there are some others that COULD work, but when I read your summary, these came to my mind instantly lol.
Thanks for your submission !
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