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bunglegaydogs · 1 year

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Oda and Dazai's relationship

Forewarning now that I've finished it; This is fucking long. Like, I;m not joking, this is almost 10,000 words. Anyways, if you want to read some of it, enjoy! <3

The things in this anime that get me are Odasaku and Dazai, Dazai and Chuuya, Yosano and Ranpo and Ranpo and Fukuzawa. Those dynamics FUCK ME UP.

And so because I like to torture myself with tears and emotions, I'm going to go on a rant about Dazai and Odasaku, because holy shit I finished The Dark Era LN yesterday and I was crying so hard that I was dizzy, shaking and could not breathe. It fucked me up fr. Anyways, I love their father/son / brother dynamic, so :)

I don't even know where to start with this? It's going to be an incoherent and incomprehensible rant, but I need to get my shit out there.

Their relationship is one of the most intrinsic and gut wrenching. Not just on a familial level, but on a personal level. Despite them never being personal with each other, they knew each other the best. Literal best friends. And that's what's so heartbreaking about Oda's death. Dazai never opens up to anyone, he never shows his true face, and always hides his intentions. When he shows his "true face" it's for a split second, blink and you miss it. As I said in a previous post, remember the Wan! jumpscare? Where Atsushi got very upset about Dazai talking about how when he goes, he wants to go out just as beautifully? That shit hurted. But it was a brief slip of the mask. After that, he remains silent. Not a word. He just stares at the fireworks, dull lifeless eyes looking up at the sky. And, when Dazai shows these sides to Odasaku, Odasaku is clearly upset by them, showing how deeply he cares for Dazai. The Dark Era LN is literally the best thing ever for going into the itty bitty of their relationship, I actually love it so much, and I will be referencing it a thousand times in this.

First episode, 15 minutes in and we already see that Dazai cares a lot for Oda. Just after Oda gets sniped in Ango's room and he phones Dazai, Dazai at first jokes about how he never usually calls him. When he realises that Oda is in a serious situation, his demeanour changes. And when Oda says that he has the Silver Oracle on hand if need be, "There's no need. Don't push yourself too hard. Wait for me to get there." Just that one sentence and we see how much he cares for him. He's being protective, making sure that Oda doesn't get himself hurt. Then, of course, comes the actual alley scene where we see a much darker side to Dazai and the anime as a whole, however it's where we also see how Dazai's mindset and habits affect Odasaku negatively, and how upset he gets when Dazai pulls this shit. There are some vital differences in the anime and with the LN which really fucking get me. The LN goes more in depth of course, but we hear the emotion in the anime. But, the book is written so well that we know the emotions anyway.

“I can see you’re not happy… I’m sorry for compromising your principles.”

His smile weakened as he spoke. Dazai usually never apologized to anyone, which was why what he said really rang true.

This always fucking gets me. He genuinely cares about what Odasaku thinks and how he feels. Dazai, who generally does not care for the emotions of others and such, apolgises when he sees that Oda is upset by something that he's done and is affected by Oda being upset, which is something that, when it comes to Dazai, is shocking, as we hardly ever see that side of him. The majority of the times that we do (honestly, if we ever do) is with Odasaku. A genuine deep-rooted affection and fondness for someone else. Yes, he deeply cares about those in the ADA, but not to the extent that he cared about Oda. He is concerned for those in the Agency's wellbeing, of course. But he's never been cared for by anyone but Odasaku before. The Agency all have deep trust between them, but Dazai will never ever show his true self to any of them. He is a guarded person, never letting anybody see his true intentions or if he's truly hurting. Odasaku has been the only one to ever see that. One of Odasaku's regrets whilst he was dying was that he never tried to get Dazai to speak up about his issues; in the LN it has such a good way of explaining how he feels about it and it tears my heart apart.

“Your organization’s called Mimic, right?” Dazai asked the man, but he didn’t reply. He didn’t even blink. “I’m not expecting an answer. To tell the truth, I admire you guys. No other organization has tried to take the Mafia head-on like this before. And nobody has ever successfully managed to point their gun at me like this with the intent to kill, either.”

Dazai faced the attacker, then began to walk toward him as if he were taking a stroll through his garden.

“Dazai, stop,” I begged in a hushed tone.

“I hope you can see the excitement in my eyes, too.” Dazai continued to address the enemy who was holding him at gunpoint. “If you just squeeze your finger ever so slightly, you can give me precisely what I crave most. The only thing I’m afraid of is that you’ll miss.”

His lips curled as he approached the man. The muzzle was now fewer than ten feet away.

“You need to aim for the heart or the head. I recommend the head. You only get one chance, though. My colleagues here won’t be kind enough to give you another.” Dazai tapped the middle of his forehead right over his eyebrows a few times. “But I know you can do it. You’re a sniper, aren’t you? I can still see the imprint from the sniper rifle on your cheek. You’re not the spotter.”

“Now shoot. Right here. You can’t miss from this close up.” Dazai grinned from ear to ear. “You’ll be killed whether or not you shoot, so just bury the enemy executive before you go.”

“Dazai!” I screamed. I felt as though we were thousands of miles apart.

“Please take me with you. Awaken me from this oxidizing world of a dream. Come, now. Shoot.”

Still pointing at his forehead, Dazai closed in on the enemy with a smile that could’ve even been described as peaceful.

The attacker bit his lip and tightened his finger around the trigger.

—He’s at his breaking point!

The sniper and I fired almost simultaneously.

Two flashes of light flooded the alley.

Shot in the arm, the man spun around.

Dazai violently bent backward after being shot point-blank.

A split second like a blue flash of lightning.

A never-ending instant.

Then time began to move again.

Immediately, Dazai’s men showered the enemy with bullets as he spun from the impact of my shot. Like a rag being pummeled by a waterfall, the man was thrown backward, scattering flesh and blood until he perished.

Leaning away, Dazai took two, three steps back before stopping.

“…………How unfortunate,” he lamented, still bent over. “Looks like I didn’t manage to die this time, either.”

Dazai lifted his head up. The skin on the side of his head, slightly above his right ear, was slit open and bleeding.

The bullet had just missed.

I looked at Dazai. There was something there invisible to the human eye. You could’ve called it demons of the mind—something that could never be seen—just something compelled to destroy all.

“Sorry to shock you like that.” Noticing my gaze, Dazai scratched the side of his head and grinned. “Pretty realistic acting, right? I knew from the start that he would miss. The imprint from the sniper rifle was on his left cheek, meaning that was the side he used to shoot. In other words, he’s left-handed, but he was holding the pistol in his right hand. So he was going to shoot with his nondominant hand, he could barely even stand on those wobbly legs, and to make matters worse, he was using that old-fashioned gun. The only way he would have hit me was if he pressed the muzzle against my body.”

I didn’t say anything. I just stared at Dazai as he explained with a smile.

“All I had to do was talk to him to buy some time until his arm got tired. If I slowly walked toward him, he wouldn’t be able to shoot straight away. The rest was in your hands, Odasaku. I knew you would do something. Pretty logical, right?”

“Yeah.”

That was all I said. I didn’t have anything else to add. Had our ranks or relations been any different, I probably would’ve punched him right then. However, I am me, and there was nothing I could do to him.

After returning my gun to its holster, I turned my back to Dazai and began walking away. With every step I took, I felt as if the ground were going to collapse, creating a bottomless hole that I would fall through for an eternity.

Dazai’s expression as he placed a finger on his forehead and approached the enemy—that of a child about to burst into tears—remained burned into my eyes.

Sorry for the long extract. Just thought the whole scene was the most effective way of showing it.

Anyways, this is one of the scenes that fucks me up the most.

Because through Odasaku's eyes, all that he sees here is a lost child, pleading and crying out for help. Despite Dazai being 18, to Oda he's still young (which, he is. 18 is fucking young.) to him. When he sees Dazai like this, he grows protective. He is rattled and very clearly shaken. The difference between the LN and the anime here is that Odasaku in the anime tells him to be quiet, because he's "heard enough". He knows that Dazai is just chatting a bit of wham.

"Dazai, stop," I begged in a hushed tone.

He's upset. Odasaku is a fucking expert at hiding his emotions, as we see when Mori tells him that Ango is missing. He expresses absolutely nothing, the twitch of his finger being the only giveaway. Here, we see how emotionally distressed he is by Dazai's actions, showing how much he truly cares for Dazai.

“Now shoot. Right here. You can’t miss from this close up.” Dazai grinned from ear to ear. “You’ll be killed whether or not you shoot, so just bury the enemy executive before you go.”

“Dazai!” I screamed. I felt as though we were thousands of miles apart.

This, once again, shows just how distressed he is. This scene fucking breaks me. He feels so far away from Dazai, because nobody can fucking reach him. Dazai's so far gone into this darkness that he's shrouded himself and found himself in that nobody can ever reach him. They can't pull him back from that ledge.

Dazai violently bent backward after being shot point-blank.

A split second like a blue flash of lightning.

A never-ending instant.

Then time began to move again.

He is fucking distressed here. Odasaku isn't doing okay, because he's scared that Dazai is dead. However, despite him knwoing he's not thanks to Flawless, he's still fucking terrified and shaken.

I looked at Dazai. There was something there invisible to the human eye. You could’ve called it demons of the mind—something that could never be seen—just something compelled to destroy all.

Oda sees more than what everyone else sees; everyone else sees a sociopathic suicidal maniac who's strange and quirky and has a weird fucking goofy side to him. However, Oda sees more to Dazai than this. Another thing to mention is that whilst everyone looks at Dazai and thinks "Wow, he seems so young for the amount of achievements in the mafia that he has. Scary kid." Odasaku sees Dazai as a child who is in need of help, a crying child who seeks someone to love and care for him. A lonely child.

Dazai’s expression as he placed a finger on his forehead and approached the enemy—that of a child about to burst into tears—remained burned into my eyes.

This. This scene is everything to me. I will never not talk about this scene when talking about Dazai and Oda. It genuinely gets me in tears, I can't deal. When I first read this I had to stop for a second, because holy shit it just got me. Oda is the only one who has ever seen Dazai like this; everyone else sees him as someone to be used, or someone to be hated, or someone to be feared. But Oda sees him as someone to be loved. When Oda says 'Dazai’s expression as he placed a finger on his forehead and approached the enemy—that of a child about to burst into tears—remained burned into my eyes.', I don't know which explanation of mine I think is the most suitable. Because, he either says this because he sees that expression, and to him it seems like Dazai is so fucking happy and ecstatic to finally having what he craves the most, and that alone unsettles Oda. Or, Oda sees that expression and is so unsettled, because to him Dazai is just a child. A crying child that is shouting for help. I genuinely think it's both, but hey, who am I to be able to discern? I'm fucking dumb lol.

Here, we see Oda's reaction after the initial shock. Here, I think it's pretty father/brother like of him when he says 'I probably would've punched him right then.' It's a protective and familial instinct; Odasaku is distressed, and wants Dazai to know that what he did was not okay. Oda is not happy with him, and Dazai kind of knows this, but doesn't know how to respond to it. As aforementioned, nobody has cared for Dazai like Odasaku does.

Now, time for a little insight on how Oda sees Dazai, and more explanation for how Oda wants to shelter him and protect him like a fucking son. One of the most heartbreaking fucking parts of the entire series; Dazai opening up for the first time ever. At least, I'm sure it is (that we see, I mean). After Dazai and Odasaku go to Bar Lupin and find Ango there, and Dazai then explains why he's not upset (bullshit he's devastated) and reveals a deep part of him, something which none of them have done with each other before, really. However, different translations, so I'll just put all three.

"It's alright, I'm not sad. I knew this would happen from the beginning. It wouldn't have mattered what side you were on. Because anything I never want to lose, is always lost. This is how it's always been for me. Everything worth wanting is lost the moment I obtain it. And nothing I pursue is worth the cost of prolonging this life of suffering." - Anime dub. "I'm not sad. I knew this from the beginning. Whether you were with the gifted special operations division or not, anything I would never want to lose is always lost. It is a given that everything that is worth wanting will be lost the moment I obtain it. There's nothing worth pursuing at the cost of prolonging a life of suffering." - Anime sub. “I’m not sad. I knew from the very beginning,” Dazai said. His face was a blank mask now. “It didn’t matter whether you were with the Special Division for Unusual Powers. I always lose the things I don’t want to lose the most. That’s why I don’t feel anything anymore. The moment you get your hands on something worth going after, you lose it. That’s just how things are. There is nothing worth pursuing at the cost of prolonging a life of suffering.” - Dark Era LN

This is actually one of the most gut wrenching scenes ever, I can't deal. Because honestly, I relate to this on a fucking spiritual level.

One of the parts that really sticks out to me is the "That's why I don't feel anything anymore." because that is how he manages these things. How he keeps his emotions in check. He just doesn't feel, he's desensitised to these things, and he tries to make sure that he doesn't care for anything, whether that be himself, subordinates, partners, friends, figures in his life, etc. He numbs himself to it all because he expects only hurt to come out of it. However, he let his guard down. He thought he could have a nice thing, and it was snatched away from him the moment he came to peace with the fact that he was comfortable with them, Oda and Ango. Then, the one thing he doesn't want to happen at all, the one fucking thing he has left to hold onto in this world is fucking ripped from him; Oda. Having already expected bad outcomes to anything that he truly desires, he still couldn't of expected it to happen and obviously wasn't prepared for Oda to just go and die like that. And he doesn't know what to do anymore. Because Oda was the last thing, his last tether to this world. He was the one thing worth living for, really, and now he's gone. Yet, Oda's final wish gives him something to keep pursuing in life. He sees no value in the act of living, and he himself sees no value within him. So, the one thing that keeps him going is Oda's final words to him. Oda's death hit him hard (obvs) because he was the last stable thing in his life when everything else fell apart. And now, he has nothing else to lean on. Oda was there for him, Oda cared for him and wasn't just using him. Dazai realises this, and that's what makes it so devastating, because Oda was the only person who Dazai could actually trust and love without getting hurt in some way or other. And we all know how important trust is to Dazai (the people that Dazai trusts are minimal. It's fucking Chuuya and Oda. Yes, he trusts the ADA. Not to the extent of these two. He places his everything in them, just in opposite ways.).

I stared at Dazai. We had known each other for a while, but this was the first time he’d ever opened up about himself. I could see a thorn the size of a harpoon wedged deeply into his life.

This got me fucked up fr fr. Oda's response to Dazai's spiel about losing the things he yearns the most. For the two years that they've known each other, Dazai has not once opened up to them. Not a single time. Yet, they all have such a deep friendship and bond that that doesn't even matter; they're as close as they are regardless. 'I could see a thorn the size of a harpoon wedged deeply into his life.' Again, this impacts Oda, because he sees how much Dazai is hurting and, once again, craves to soothe him, because he sees a child in distress.

“Dazai.”

He paused when I called his name. I didn’t have anything else to say, though; I simply said his name.

Nobody knew what Dazai was really thinking.

It’s an unwritten rule in the Mafia to not stick your nose where it doesn’t belong. One must never open the door to another’s heart and try to judge them for the darkness tucked within. That was one nice thing about the Mafia.

But maybe, just maybe, that was the wrong approach—or at the very least, when it came to the man sitting next to me. Somebody probably should’ve tied him up, pried his chest open, and stuffed a vacuum cleaner inside. Then, as he screamed and cried until they needed to punch him to shut him up, they’d suck every last bit out of his chest and stamp it into the ground.

But in reality, such a vacuum didn’t exist. Chests don’t open up like that, and no one is capable of such feats. What we see is everything, and everything we see, we ignore. All we can do is stand before the deep ditch between us and others and keep silent.

“Well, I should get going,” Dazai said before standing.

“Dazai.” He turned around when I called out to him. Rubbing my hands together, I looked down at the empty plate and coffee cup, then back up. “Are you thinking that way because—?”

Out of nowhere, Dazai’s cell phone began to ring. He lightly bowed to me before placing the phone against his ear and answering. A few moments went by as he listened to whoever was on the other side, but soon enough, his lips suddenly twisted into a grin.

Bro, bro. This gets me fucked up.

Nobody knew what Dazai was really thinking.

'...for the darkness tucked within.' With it being the mafia, Odasaku clearly knows that everyone's going through some fucked up shit. And he knows not to stick his nose in other people's business, because he wouldn't want people doing that to him. Except, something is compelling him to get Dazai to open up, to show Odasaku the darkness and seek the help he needs. Once again, crying child analogy.

'Then, as he screamed and cried until they needed to punch him to shut him up, they'd suck every last bit out of his chest and stamp it into the ground.' Christ, Odasaku. Pretty fucking deep analogy there. But this here just shows us how deeply affected and wounded Oda is by how hurt Dazai is. It also gives us more child-like statements from Oda. The way he describes it here just reminds me of a child. A child, kicking and screaming because whatever is happening to them they do not like. And this is exactly what's happening; he's saying that he knows that Dazai would not appreciate people looking further into his life and soul, and that he would very clearly make a fuss and a protest about it. It also likens it to 'The Time I Picked Up Dazai' (it's such a good read. If you haven't read it, I highly suggest that you do. Also, spoilers ahead for it <3) ~~~ The way it reflects the book is in it, there is a scene in which Oda has to physically restrain Dazai from trying to stab himself with a knife whilst he's grinning like a madman.

~~~

However, my expectation is betrayed once again. I have forgotten about the foreign matter that exists in this house. Dazai, of course. He is more unpredictable than any human I have ever met. For example, if two people are on a three-legged race to the goal, Dazai might just turn around and start running in the opposite direction at a random moment. Or, he can desperately climb a cliff to survive, then all of a sudden, say that he wants to fall off it and die. He is a guy that has strayed too far from the reasons of this world. Our dear Trickster.

Dazai suddenly comes up with the idea that if he jumps out of the door with a gun in his hand, there are chances he can be shot dead by the cops. Oda tells him there is no gun in the house, so he decides to get a knife instead. He rushes into the kitchen, even faster than Oda. The cops outside notice the sound and ask them to open the door.

Oda knows that he has to stop Dazai, if he doesn’t want things to get worse.

I have to stop that. I so want to cry and ask someone to help, but there is no one who can do it but me now.

He jumps up and sweeps Dazai’s legs, making him roll on the floor. He grabs Dazai’s neck, turns behind and gets into a chokehold, trying to choke him unconscious. Dazai, as a result, struggles happily while kicking his legs around. He hits the kitchen cabinet once, twice until Oda hears a sound of something coming off. Oda realizes that those desperate kicks are actually on purpose, and it makes the knife Dazai was trying to grab earlier fall off right to where Oda is. Oda can’t move because he is busy holding Dazai down, so he has to use his ability to predict the track of the knife and barely dodges it. The knife stabs vertically into the floor next to him. He tries to calm Dazai down.

“Be still.” I say, “Don’t struggle. It is not scary. It doesn’t hurt.”

I don’t even know what I’m saying myself.

“You liar! Mori-san said the same thing when he gave me shots.”

Dazai says so and keeps going wild. It means there are other people besides me who are having a hard time with Dazai. Who is this Mori-san again?

Dazai keeps kicking the kitchen stand and this time, it’s the kettle above Oda’s head that’s going to fall.

It is a situation that I have never experienced before. A kettle above my head, a knife next to my face, false money somewhere in my room, cops at my door. And I’m strangling a guy I just barely met.

Oda finally manages to choke Dazai unconscious. He goes “fufu ahaha” before he faints. Oda pulls out the knife next to him and throws it toward the falling kettle, successfully catching it by its handle and having it jammed into the wooden part of the kitchen cabinet. By that time, the cops also manage to kick the door open and step into the room.

~~~

(translation and descriptions by @popopretty ! <333)

This entire scene is so fucking goofy to me and genuinely one of my favourites, but it's also really scary because Dazai just really wants to fucking die. However, after only a few days of knowing him, Oda is growing to care for him and doesn't want him to die. Twice in this extract thing does he try and stop him, and then once more before this when Dazai tries crawling out of the house to go and die outside, to which Odasaku grabs him by his legs, wraps him in a blanket, drags him back to the bed and ties him up. Referring back to Odasaku's analogy to "get the darkness out" of Dazai, this scene is pretty similar to what he said. Dazai is fucking booting the kitchen cabinet to try and stab himself with the knife or get crushed by the kettle, and Oda is doing his damndest to stop him, resorting to strangling him unconscious so that he doesn't keep going fucking insane. Dazai, of course, finds this all highly amusing. To be honest, I might have only just realised that I'm reading it wrong. He was trying to kill himself with the knife first, but then because Oda gets him in a chokehold, he tries to get him off him instead? Man, I don't know. Either way, goofiest scene ever. I love it. But, he's 16 here (I think. I tried working it out, and I think he is. Because in Side B, when he's torturing that guy, he says that he's a PM Executive. And Oda talks about how young he looks, and in the anime/LN talks about the fact that he's known him a fairly long time. I wouldn't say that one year is a long time, but two years yeah. So Dazai's either 17 or 16 when he first meets Oda, and I won't lie, I think 16. ANYWAYS-) and so of course, Oda sees him as a child (which he is). However, despite him watching Dazai age for those two years, he still sees him as a child that he needs to protect, a child that he worries for.

He tries to calm Dazai down.

“Be still.” I say, “Don’t struggle. It is not scary. It doesn’t hurt.”

I don’t even know what I’m saying myself.

“You liar! Mori-san said the same thing when he gave me shots.”

Dazai says so and keeps going wild. It means there are other people besides me who are having a hard time with Dazai. Who is this Mori-san again?

This entire interaction to me seems like a child at the dentist or something. Despite the fact that he's got a kid in a chokehold tryna knock him out, he's reassuring him that it's fine, painless, and that he needs to calm down. Crying. This fucking guy. This whole bit is literally just Oda trying to subdue a kid going off the rails, and even the references to Mori (I will be fucking getting into what Dazai said when I do another analysis thing, don't you fucking worry) and Oda thinking 'It means there are other people besides me who are having a hard time with Dazai.' Problem child fr. Makes me giggle, also makes me sad. Anyways. Odasaku and Dazai's interactions are usually Odasaku letting Dazai be quite child-like, allowing for these things, because he knows that he hasn't been able to have a childhod or be a child. He lets Dazai be who he wants to be in front of him, no judgement. Dazai has many faces for other people, but with Oda, he can just let his guard down that small bit, be more comfortable with him. And Ango. They were like his makeshift parents in the time that he knew them. And then he loses that found family, and so where's that left him now?

“I have this friend who’s supporting several orphans all on his own, you see,” he continued, his weapon still drawn and aimed at the boy. “Akutagawa, I’m sure Odasaku would’ve been patient enough to give you the guidance you needed had he been the one who’d found you on the brink of starvation in the slums. That would have been the ‘right’ thing to do. But ‘righteousness’ doesn’t take very kindly to me. And there’s only one thing people like me do to useless subordinates.”

Okay, this is going to deep Dazai a bit more rather than both Dazai and Oda's relationship. The part about righteousness reminds me of when Chuuya scolded him for shooting the dead body more times than was morally necessary. And he says 'Yeah. That would be the right/normal/ordinary way to think. Of course. Haha.' Dazai has no sense of right or wrong, as Odasaku says. He says to him that he knows he doesn't care about good or bad, and he can never fill that emptiness that he so desperately longs to fill. Dazai isn't like how he is here around Odasaku, because he trusts Odasaku and doesn't need to be intimidating or cold around him. He's allowed to be playful and innocent, and truly try and connect to that child he'd long ago lost and forgotten. And with Ango and Oda both looking out for him, with them two he truly felt like he belonged somewhere, and had people to care for him, despite him not knowing how to handle that or how to cope with it. He doesn't understand why, but he can let himself indulge in it for just a bit. He needs Ango and Oda there for him, and when he loses that, he loses himself. Slowly, he's becoming more and more empty and at a loss with himself for what to do, which is something we don't see from Dazai. Dazai knows everything that is going to happen. He knows everything, and doesn't need to question what he does or what to do next, as he always has his next step planned. However, when Oda dies, we see that facade come crumbling down as for one of the first times, he can't keep his emotions in check and he doesn't know what to do or where to go from here, as the last things he was holding onto in this world have left him, and he's left with nothing but himself and a cavenous hole in his heart where Ango and Oda once sat. That's been ripped from him, and so with his emotions laid bare in front of him as he's forced to confront a distressing situation, he looks to Oda for help. He doesn't know what to do with himself once Oda leaves him, and so he desperately asks Oda to help him. Fuck me, I'm tearing up sorry lmao.

I was in a hospital room. It was clean, ordinary, and as silent as a morgue. Standing firm with his feet apart by the door was a man in a black suit and sunglasses. The moment our eyes met, he silently left, apparently to go get someone.

“Hey, Odasaku. You’re awake now, right? How are you feeling?”

Dazai walked into the room with a cheerful smirk.

Sorry, this is just here because I'd like to point out that Dazai was waiting for him that whole time since he found him, and he had someone guard the door to make sure that nobody would come back for him, I'm guessing. And also he must have told the guy "Ay tell me when he wakes up." And that just really warms my heart and devastates me at the same time <3

Dazai placed a thumb against his lips, then shifted into a thinking position. He didn’t even move an inch for a full minute after that. Only his eyes wavered, following something only he could see. I waited in silence.

Oda's patience with Dazai. Wholesome shit. He fr sat there for a while minute in silence to let Dazai think.

I got out of the bed as I listened. My fingers were still slightly numb, but not enough to bother me during battle.

“Odasaku, don’t tell me you plan on going,” he said as if reprimanding me.

This is one of the moments where we see a more brotherly relationship from the two of them. Dazai is scolding Oda because he's injured and has just been through quite the ordeal, yet he's still standing up and leaaving to go fight and help Dazai's men.

I didn’t answer him; I just opened the door and left. Dazai saw me off without pushing any further. Despite not even exchanging a word, we were thinking the same thing.

Vice versa; Dazai's patience with Oda, and the fact that he doesn't push Odasaku for anything more than he's given him. If Odasaku doesn't want to say anything, Dazai won't pressure him into talking. He won't force him to say anything he doesn't want to. They respect each other, and they understand one another. 'Despite not even exchanging a word, we were thinking the same thing.' They understand each other to such a degree that countless times throughout this arc, they wordlessly communicate with one another, basically read the other's mind or just know what they're thinking, about to say, their plans, etc. It's a very important dynamic that shows their level of trust and their bond.

Now, this is going to be the bit that fucks me up the most, and I will cry whilst writing these bits. Because now we're getting into Oda's death and Dazai's reaction to realising Mori's plans, etc.

“Odasaku!”

I was stopped by a familiar voice the moment I left the restaurant.

“Dazai? What’s wrong?”

Clearly, for Odasaku to ask what was wrong, Dazai must have sounded pretty fucking emotional. Also, Oda, babes, the fuck you mean "what's wrong" as if he's not gonna know?

“Odasaku, I know what you’re thinking, but don’t. Doing that isn’t going to—”

“Isn’t going to bring the kids back?” I asked.

Lost for words, Dazai fell silent.

Dazai being "lost for words" and "silent" is quite the shock. Dazai always knows what words to say, how to say them, when to say them, etc. He always has some retort or sarcastic reply, and always has to get the last word in. Dazai being at a loss for words shows just how unprecedented this is for him, and how he doesn't know how to cope with it. Once again, he is a lost child, seeking guidance.

“Odasaku…,” Dazai said softly. “Forgive me for the absurd wording, but—don’t go. Find something to rely on. Expect good things to happen from here on out. There’s gotta be something… Hey, Odasaku, do you know why I joined the Mafia?”

I stared at him. We had known each other for a long time, but he’d never even attempted to talk about that.

“I joined the Mafia because of an expectation I had. I thought if I was close to death and violence—close to people giving in to their urges and desires, then I would be able to see the inner nature of humankind up close. I thought if I did that…” Dazai paused before continuing, “…I would be able to find something—a reason to live.”

I looked at him; he looked back at me.

“I wanted to be a novelist,” I said. “I thought I wouldn’t deserve such a life if I killed someone during a mission. That’s why I never killed anyone. But that’s all in the past. There’s only one thing I want now.”

“Odasaku!”

I began to walk away. Dazai yelled out, but I didn’t turn around.

First of all;

The fact that he asks for forgiveness for his "absurd wording" of don't go. It shows just how much he lacks in understanding others and himself. He thinks that these are the "wrong things" to say, because he's not used to expressing his emotions properly, and he can't articulate how he feels, because he usually feels nothing. He's usually numb and does not give a shit, but here he's completely puzzled and lost because he's feeling too much.

I stared at him. We had known each other for a long time, but he’d never even attempted to talk about that.

Not once. He'd never even brought it up in conversation, or even "attempted" it. He hides himself from the world and those around him in order to guard himself so that he doesn't get hurt or lose the things he cares about, which is why he detaches himself and numbs down everything so that he doesn't care about anyone or anything.

“Odasaku!”

I began to walk away. Dazai yelled out, but I didn’t turn around.

This will fucking kill him. One of my favourite (technically two) scenes in the anime is the parallel's between Dazai reaching out for Oda when he walks away from him, and Oda reaching out for Dazai when he walks away from him, both times one of them is heading towards death and the other is trying to stop them. But they're not close enough, and they're not fast enough. Genuinely, the scenes kill me, because the parallel's are stunning, I won't lie. It's fucking heartbreakingly beautiful.

Dazai strode confidently through the Mafia’s high-rise headquarters downtown at a quick clip, his heels practically scraping off the carpet underfoot. He got on the glass-paneled elevator alone, pressed the button to the top floor, then closed his eyes. When the elevator reached his destination, he opened his eyes again. His gaze was focused on only one thing—the office at the very end of the hallway.

Now, I have a few mini theories about why he closed his eyes, but what I want to focus on is not that. It's his determination and desperation to save Odasaku.

“Boss.” Dazai cut him off. “You know why I’m here, don’t you?”

The fucking Boss of the Port Mafia. Yet, Dazai has no time for games. He has no time for Mori's bullshit antics, he needs to save Odasaku. That is his number one priority right now.

Taken by surprise, Dazai fell silent. Even he felt as if he were walking on fine blades whenever he talked with Ougai. If he made just one little mistake, he could fall off the path. After pondering to himself for a moment, Dazai said, “I need permission to form a small team of executive-level skill users to attack Mimic headquarters and rescue Odasaku.”

He cannot afford to mess this up, because Oda needs him. Once again, Dazai is taken by surprise and sent into silence, which is extremely odd and rare for him to do so. He is clearly nervous about talking to Mori already, on top of the added pressure of Odasaku's life in his hands right now.

Dazai stared back at the boss without breaking eye contact for even a moment. Ougai’s narrowed eyes harbored a tinge of cleverness, as if they could see into his heart. It was the same kind of light that was once in Dazai’s eyes when he looked upon his enemies or allies.

Enemy or ally regardless, Dazai saw everyone the same. He had no time to be concerned with other people, especially as he isn't even concerned for himself. So, again like I said, he numbs himself to these things. He makes it so that he doesn't feel, and so that should an unfortunate situation come to pass, he's not affected by it by harbouring fondness for other people. Which is why it says "was the same kind", not "is the same kind", because Odasaku has changed him. Oda is neither friend nor foe; he's family. He's the most important thing in Dazai's life. He's a sole figure, there for him. A true father figure, someone to raise him properly, unlike Mori. Dazai realises this; as we see here, Dazai is no longer interested in anything anymore. He has grown tired even of the Port Mafia, and he certainly doesn't hold Mori in high regard as he once kind of did.

“Odasaku is currently scouting the enemy headquarters alone,” Dazai said, keeping his emotions in check. “I sent an emergency response team of Mafia members to the area, but it isn’t nearly enough. At this rate, we are going to lose a valuable skill user.”

"Keeping his emotions in check." He's not lowering his guard down in front of Mori. He won't show him his true face. But right now, he's desperate. He wants Odasaku saved, and he will do whatever it takes.

“Of course, he’s a dear ally of ours, but is he worth sending executive-level men to the front line to save?”

“Yes,” Dazai confidently declared. “Of course he is.”

Ougai fell silent. He looked at Dazai, who looked straight back at him. It was an eloquent silence. The two men understood the other’s state of mind and how they would counter.

Dazai is prepared to risk his life for Oda, and Mori sees this, using it to his advantage. He sees just how much Dazai cares about Odasaku and manipulates the whole thing behind the scenes. And the zero hesitation from Dazai when he says it. "The two understood the other's state of mind and how they would counter." Once again, Mori has raised Dazai to be so much like him that they understand each other and a far more complex level than ordinary people. Also, this line just shows that Mori sees how fragile Dazai's state of mind is at the present time, his desperation to save his friend.

“…Dazai.” It was Ougai who put an end to the wordless debate. “Let me ask you this. I understand your plan, but in all likelihood, Oda doesn’t want help. What do you think about that?”

Dazai tried to answer, but he could not find the words to say.

Dazai knows Oda best. He knows that it's true, but nothing is going to stop him from trying. Still, he's trying to articulate his words, which he isn't doing too well at.

Dazai’s eyes were inadvertently locked on the envelope. Suddenly, he caught his breath.

“This envelope—”

Something began to thrash and flicker in the back of Dazai’s mind. It gradually turned into physical shaking, causing his head to go numb.

“I see.” Dazai managed to squeeze out just those two words, his face deathly pale. “So that’s what this is.”

Then he turned on his heel and put his back to Ougai.

“If you’ll excuse me.”

“Where are you going?” Ougai asked.

“To Odasaku.”

Now this is the part that really gets me.

With just one measly glance, Dazai has seen Mori's plan, beginning to end. Which is why he's so eager to leave, because he knows that Mori is planning to let this end with/in Oda's death. And the part that really gets me emotional is 'Something began to thrash and flicker in the back of Dazai’s mind. It gradually turned into physical shaking, causing his head to go numb.' We've never seen such a visceral reaction from Dazai before (with the exception of Oda's death.), with him physically shaking and his mind racing. Man's is fucking trembling, because he knows everything in that moment. And he can't bear it. Dazai, who usually has a tight hold of his emotions, cannot keep his grip on them no more, when it comes to Odasaku. Oda is so important to him, and Dazai realises that soon there is a high chance of him losing that.

Dazai calmly stared at the guns pointed in his direction.

“You still haven’t had any tea, Dazai,” Ougai said. “Come—have a seat.”

Dazai didn’t even budge. A guard in a black suit slipped to his side, then pointed the automatic rifle’s muzzle right at his head.

“Odasaku’s waiting for me.”

“Sit.”

All that is going through his head right now is Odasaku. He can't think of anything else, he doesn't have time for that. He can't afford to think about anything but the plan of action to save him.

“Dazai.” Ougai, who had been listening in silence, cut Dazai off for the first time. “What remarkable inference. There is nothing that needs correcting. I have just one thing I’d like to ask: What’s wrong with that?”

“……”

This is one of our first hints towards Dazai showing a hint of compassion for other people, because he now knows what it's like when you have someone that you love.

"So why are you so angry?”

Dazai didn’t say a word. That was just about the first time he’d ever been unable to articulate his feelings.

“I…”

—“There is nothing worth pursuing at the cost of prolonging a life of suffering.”

—“Awaken me from this oxidizing world of a dream.”

“I just…” His voice came out strained. “I just don’t get it. You were the one who tipped Mimic off about the orphans’ safe house. No one else could’ve found out about the location I chose. You killed those kids to get Odasaku to fight Mimic’s leader because he is the only one who can defeat him.”

“My answer is the same, Dazai. I will do anything for the benefit of the organization. Besides, we are the Port Mafia. We have always brought darkness, violence, and cruelty to this city. Why is that a problem now?”

This scene is also another scene that really gets me fucking devastated. We have never seen Dazai like this. Strained voice, unable to speak, and seeming timid and meek. Here is the child that Oda sees when he looks at Dazai; lost, wandering and alone. He can't say what he feels, he doesn't know how to. He knows nothing but to numb himself from these things to not get hurt. "I just don't get it." Dazai doesn't understand, which is scary for him. He's not used to it, and he doesn't like it. He wants to save Odasaku, and the one time he needs to be clever and think about it, he's unable to, because he doesn't know what's going on.

Dazai knew. He knew Ougai’s calculations, his mentality, and the rationale behind the plan. That was just the kind of organization the Port Mafia was. Logically speaking, Ougai was right, and Dazai was wrong.

“But…”

He turned on his heel, then began walking toward the door. Immediately, Ougai’s guards pointed their guns at him.

“You cannot go, Dazai,” Ougai called out to stop him. “Stay. Or do you have a logical reason for going to him?”

He wants to get to Odasaku. He doesn't care if he betrays Mori's orders; Odasaku comes first. He knows the logic behind it, yet he doesn't care. Morally, Dazai is right, and that's probably a first.

Ougai grinned. “True. However, you wouldn’t gain anything by disobeying me and going to him, either. Am I wrong?”

“That’s the second thing I wanted to say, Boss. There’s nothing in it for me. There’s only one reason why I’m going. Because he is my friend. Now, if you’ll excuse me.”

The guards placed their fingers on the triggers. However, Dazai paid them no mind and simply strolled to the door as if he were going for a walk.

Again, he is not assed. This is the first time Dazai has openly admitted to having a friend, or any kind of relation. Which is what makes it hurt more; because the second he acknowledges it, he loses it. 'There's nothing in it for me.' He's not doing this out of personal gain, like Mori does, he's doing it because he doesn't want to lose somebody important to him.

“Odasaku!”

Dazai rushed into the building and over to the ballroom, passing the myriad of corpses through the corridors along the way. When he burst through the oak doors, he saw his friend lying on the ground.

“Odasaku!”

Despite the chance of there being soldiers lurking, waiting to kill him, or the chance that Gide was still alive and would kill him, he continues to search for Odasaku. And when he finds him, fuck, it's not very pleasant. God, I'm going to cry.

“Dazai…”

Dazai rushed over to Odasaku, then checked his wounds. The bullet had pierced Odasaku’s chest, and a vast pool of blood had collected on the floor. It was clear that the wound was fatal.

“You’re such an idiot, Odasaku. The biggest idiot I know.”

“Yeah.”

“You didn’t have to do this. You didn’t have to die.”

“I know.”

Odasaku smirked with that particular satisfaction of accomplishing something worth the cost.

“Dazai… There’s something I want to say.”

This shit hurted.

“Don’t. Stop. We might still be able to save you. No, we will save you. So don’t say such—”

“Listen.” Odasaku wrapped his blood-soaked hand around Dazai’s. “You told me if you put yourself in a world of violence and bloodshed, you might be able to find a reason to live…”

“Yeah, I said that. I did. But what difference does that—?”

“You won’t find it,” Odasaku said in almost a whisper. Dazai stared at him.

Dazai is trying to convince himself that everything will be fine, that they will save Odasaku. He's determined; he won't let him die on him like this. And Dazai doesn't care about anything else but him right now.

“You should know that. Whether you’re on the side that takes lives or the side that saves them, nothing beyond your own expectations will happen. Nothing in this world can fill the hole that is your loneliness. You will wander the darkness for eternity.”

—“Awaken me from this oxidizing world of a dream.”

That was when Dazai first realized: Sakunosuke Oda understood him much more than he’d ever imagined—right up to his very heart, almost to the center of his mind. Dazai didn’t realize until then that someone had known him so well.

For the first time in his life, Dazai wanted from the bottom of his heart to know something. He asked the man before him:

“Odasaku… What should I do?”

OKAY NOW THIS.

This is one of the most important parts; because Dazai finally found someone who understood him. Nobody has gotten further in understanding him than Odasaku has, and the fact that he realises this just before he dies is what makes his death hit even harder. And the fact that, at this last moment, Dazai seeks guidance from the man in his arms. Because once he's gone, he has nobody left. Nothing. And just at this last moment, Dazai "wanted from from the bottom of his heart to know something". We see Dazai continuously dehumanise himself, not seeing himself as an actual person half the time. He believes that he is heartless, cold, and cruel. Yet, here, we see that Oda has had a strong impact on him; he's made him realise that maybe he does have something there. Also, where it says "almost to the center of his mind". Dazai's mind is just impenetreable, yet Oda has gotten the farthest. That alone is a feat in itself, and Dazai realises just how close they are, and how much Oda really, truly understands him on a personal level.

“Be on the side that saves people,” Odasaku replied. “If both sides are the same, then choose to become a good person. Save the weak, protect the orphaned. You might not see a great difference between right and wrong, but…saving others is something just a bit more wonderful.”

“How do you know?”

“I know. I know better than anyone else.”

Dazai gazed into Odasaku’s eyes and saw a glow of conviction.

It was clear that those words were supported by some sort of strong basis. Whether it was past experience or someone’s advice—Odasaku was trying to show Dazai the path he himself had once tried to walk. Dazai knew that.

That was why he could bring himself to believe it.

“…Okay. I will.”

“‘People live to save themselves. It’s something they realize right before they die,’ huh…? He was…right…” The color in Odasaku’s face gradually disappeared until he was almost completely pale. He smiled. “I could really go for some of that curry…”

With trembling fingers, Odasaku reached for the cigarettes in his pocket before sluggishly placing one in his mouth. By the time he pulled out a match, his fingers were too weak to hold it anymore. Dazai took the match and lit the cigarette for him. Then Odasaku closed his eyes, smoking the cigarette as he smiled, filled to the brim with satisfaction.

The cigarette fell to the ground.

Dropping onto his knees by Odasaku’s side, Dazai looked up to the ceiling and closed his eyes. His tightly shut lips faintly trembled. The smoke from the cigarette rose straight up to the top.

Nobody said a word.

Now, here;

"...but…saving others is something just a bit more wonderful.”

“How do you know?”

“I know. I know better than anyone else.”

Dazai gazed into Odasaku’s eyes and saw a glow of conviction.

I personally think that this is Oda saying that he tried to save Dazai. And that how far Dazai has come is something that he should be proud of, and something that is "beautiful" about Dazai, something which he really wouldn't ever fucking use to describe himself. And the fact that he trusts Oda's words, he believes them truly, because he loves him and he knows. He fucking knows that those words hold weight, and that Dazai is going to uphold his promise to him. He's going to do whatever it takes to keep Oda alive in whatever way possible after death, and honour his memory, and give him a life that he wanted to have but never got to.

In the middle of a verdant mountain trail atop a hill overlooking Yokohama was a cemetery with a view of the ocean. There were many new graves lined up—among them a small white burial marker without a name.

Dazai stood before the burial marker, dressed in black mourning clothes and holding a bouquet of white flowers.

“……”

He squinted as the strong sea breeze suddenly gusted past. The white flowers fluttered in the wind.

“I’ll leave this photo here.”

He took out a picture and placed it before the burial marker. Frozen in time were the smiles of those three men.

“I really wish you could’ve tried that hard tofu I made…”

Dazai closed his eyes, then stood absolutely still, rooted to the spot.

Now, my guess here is that this is where Dazai went when he abandoned the mission for the PM so suddenly, especially as Akutagawa is off fighting some people.

“I really wish you could’ve tried that hard tofu I made…”

Remembering the little things, the small conversations that they had and treasuring them, despite the tofu being Dazai trying to kill himself again. Some sort of twisted, dark humour maybe. And the fact that he's stood deadly still, unmoving. I honestly think he's afraid. He's afraid that if he moves too much, or shows even a hint of emotion, it will all come fucking storming out in a whirlwind of painful fucking memories, feelings, etc. And he doesn't want that.

Right, I am so fucking sorry about the length of this one. It is currently 3:22 AM and I'm on the verge of tears watching The Dark Era episodes whilst writing this. I started this shit at 20 past 12. I am so fucking sorry.

In conclusion, one of the most important relationships (I think) is that of Odasaku and Dazai, as it gives us much more insight into the both of their characters, and how each of them affect one another and the fact that they're each the only one caring for the other person. Ango, yes, but Oda and Dazai are just kind of on another level of friendship, despite how close they are with Ango.

There are (surprisingly) a lot more things I wanted to say, but I decided against it so that it wouldn't be too long. Well, longer than it already is. If you couldn't tell, I'm quite passionate on this subject.

Anyways, if you've read this far somehow, I hope you have a lovely day/night! <333

#bungou stray dogs #bsd #port mafia #ada #osamu dazai #oda sakunosuke #ango sakaguchi #manga #anime #light novel #the dark era #analysis #their dynamic sends me spiralling #i love them both so much #why is everything so fucking tragic

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churchofthecomet · 3 months

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I haven't watched Leverage in a while, see my last complaint post about their Stuxnet episode. But in the meantime I've been consuming other media, and it just struck me how equal the dynamic is between all of the Leverage characters.

Every character in this show is competent. They each have Their Thing that They Do, and if one of them is absent for an episode, the rest of the team suffers until they get back. I complain about them short-changing Hardison by making the tech stuff unrealistic and incomprehensible (so you can't get a feel for how good he is at it, like you can with Eliot punching people -- although if I knew more about fighting I'm sure I'd be complaining about Eliot's scenes too). But at least within the narrative he is really good at his job, and the other team members know it. Likewise for Eliot, Parker, Nate, and Sophie -- they're each at the top of their respective classes. They have separate specialties and they're amazing at those specialties.

And what's more, the interpersonal dynamics reflect this. Nate is an asshole to the rest of them, but there are FOUR OF THEM so it balances him out -- they can commiserate with each other, sit him down and have a talk with him, threaten to strike, whatever, and their side of the relationship is treated with importance because the team couldn't function without them.

Hardison and Eliot's sniping is just friendly banter, and they know it. Everyone is so supportive of Parker's social problems. Sophie is the one with the most traditionally-feminine skillset, something which might be demeaned in another show (and I have some complaints with Leverage's treatment of her), but she's taken seriously both in-universe and by the show itself. They all work wonderfully together. They balance each other out, and they become more than the sum of their parts.

Contrast this with the dynamics in a bunch of other modern media. Let's grab my favorite punching bag of late, BBC Sherlock. Sherlock is far and away the more useful member of the Sherlock-and-John team. The narrative places incredible weight on his intelligence, and John is stuck in a support role. Sherlock is also mean to John, and since John is one person (without much of a spine for standing up to Sherlock!) it feels utterly abusive. The "friendly banter" isn't banter. The "aww look they really DO care about each other" moments were enough for me when I was 13 or 14, but now it just feels like a cycle of abuse. The dynamic is fundamentally not equal. If I'm watching a TV show and I start to think "man character A really needs like 6 months of therapy to stop hating themself and they NEED to leave character B," when the show's message is "character A and character B are a match made in heaven you guys," the show has failed.

See also Our Flag Means Death season 2 with the relationship between... honestly Ed and the rest of the crew, but mostly Ed and Stede. Ed is the best pirate anyone's ever seen -- the rest of them are pretty good but no match for him. The one guy who had a chance of standing up to Ed and equalizing things got killed off at the end of the season, and Stede (as we've seen) lacks a spine to stand up to Ed. Controversial take but Good Omens might be heading in this direction? They defanged Aziraphale and made him into way more of a softie than the book or Season 1 imply. Meanwhile Crowley is Competent and Right About Everything by comparison. The general pattern here is that couples (or whatever the fuck was going on with BBC Sherlock and John) are worse off. I don't know if it's lasting heteronormativity or "two-person dynamics are hard," but the urge to make sunshine-and-stormcloud pairings where the stormcloud acts like shit towards the sunshine is just... too strong.

Leverage is this rare show that refuses to shit on any of its protagonists. Everyone's in the loop, everyone sees some character development, and it fucking RULES. I wish they could make more TV shows like this in 2024.

#leverage #ofmd critical #bbc sherlock critical #good omens critical #(only slightly)#found families #i need leverage but with like even better politics pleaseeee #i think Firefly is also good at this #or maybe i just thought Mal and Wash were hot? can't tell #i should go rewatch it

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glittergoblinzz · 1 month

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Finally finished it!

It's not the best ref sheet in the world but it'll do for now. I've got a lot of her info all planned out below if anyone is interested in learning about her ☺️

• Name - Evelyn Williams (call sign "Kiwi")

• Age - 25

• Evelyn absolutely loves animals, especially birds, wolves and bears. She's also got a thing for dark humor and uses it to cope with some of her trauma

• Ethnicity - Half Russian, Half German. Her mother was German and her father was Russian.

• Born in Moscow, her mother took her and moved out of Russia after her father had died when she was eight. They moved in with her Mother's sister, who was living in Wales in the time. Eventually her mother got back on her feet but her mom liked living in the UK more than Russia so she decided to stay

• Evelyn signed up for the military as soon as she was able to. She's always been a wild thing and had a strange fascination with bombs/explosions....so what better way to chase that interest by joining the military?

• Despite the yearning to "legally" blow stuff up, she was better at sniping....which eventually earned her a spot on TF141

• She got the call sign "Kiwi" because she's the shortest on Task Force 141 by FAR plus she has a love for birds, so it was only natural Soap of all people would start calling her a little "Kiwi" for shits and giggles but the name ended up sticking

•Most of her scars came from incidents involving explosives she was sent in to disarm or set....Most of them, anyways....

• Quite a few of her scars on her torso and back, including the one on her neck, came from a mission that went wrong and she was mistaken as KIA and left behind by the team when they needed to evac ASAP.....

I'm not spoiling too much on her story yet 🤫 The rest will be posted about later on.....

#cod mw2 #cod mwii #cod #my art #GlitterGoblinz art #cod modern warfare #cod mw3 #tf 141 #tf 141 oc #cod oc art #cod oc #cod original character

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unfortunatelyilikebnha · 4 months

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Ok now that I’m thinking abt it cfv cast social media headcanons if cfv was set a little closer to now than 2011:

Aichi: he has Instagram but mostly to follow Kai (who didn’t actually accept his follow request until like the end of season 1 lmao) and Misaki and all his other friends rather than out of a particular desire to post pictures himself. It’s a private account and he posts when the mood strikes him, with content wildly varying from like pictures with friends to cute animals to cool new vanguard cards to food that was particularly good. Has Snapchat because Kamui bugged him about it and mostly uses it for streaks (but he forgets a lot & kamui’s like BROTHER AICHIIIIIIII :( OUR STREAK :( ).

Kai: Instagram. It’s also a private account, and for a while he just had 2 followers (Ren and Tetsu), then after their fallout he blocked Ren and Tetsu but Miwa bugged him into accepting his request (though he didn’t really post during that time just used it to observe), then after s1 he finally accepted more of his friends’ follow requests. Eventually he starts posting food he made & ofc his favorite kagero units (& maybe his friends. Occasionally. He’s not big on writing captions though). I can also see him having a Twitter where people try to antagonize him & he roasts the shit out of them (Kamui is constantly in his mentions trying to start shit, at first out of genuine dislike - he gets blocked for a while because of this - but then just for fun. Kai still blocks him every so often, and/or occasionally plays along and snipes back with some rude comment, but it’s mostly to annoy him back rather than out of genuine malice. Mostly. He does enjoy being an asshole to Kamui though). Has Snapchat but pretty much only opens it when Aichi sends him something (Ren likes to send him a million snaps chronicling his whole day to annoy him so mostly he ignores the app).

Misaki: she’s a Pinterest girlie for sure. Very organized Pinterest boards with images that are always properly sourced. She also has Instagram (also a private acc) but she didn’t use it much before she met her card capital friends, now she uses it to keep tabs on Aichi and the others. She doesn’t really post pictures except on special occasions but she is an avid close friends story user, especially when she knows Kourin will see her posts (before s4? Or au where she doesn’t disappear I guess? Idk it’s my city & I’m already diverging from canon to say they have social media just roll with it). There’s also an official Card Capital Instagram, and when she becomes the store owner in G she doesn’t really run it but she has to approve the content that gets posted there. I can also see her having tumblr just bc of her “strange” sense of humor, like she’d be very anonymous about it and not put basically anything in her bio (MAYBE her name but maybe not even that, & possibly a fake name), but I can see her being fairly popular here.

Kamui: he’s too young for social media AND YET he has it anyways. Can frequently be found getting into fights on Twitter. He’s also a big Snapchat user and HATES when people leave him on read, or when someone’s about to break a streak. Very big on streaks in general, has insanely long ones with Reiji and Eiji. Also he definitely has tiktok and (he will deny this but) he’s jealous when anyone he knows has more followers than he does. How does Suzugamori Ren have that many followers anyways >:/? In G era he downloads Instagram because he heard that Emi did it.

Miwa: definitely a Reddit user (but like not in the derogatory way, he’s just fascinated by the site). He has a personal Instagram as well as a wildly popular other account dedicated to unflattering candid pictures of his friends (mostly Kai but Misaki Kamui and Morikawa are also frequent features, and, on one memorable occasion, Jun). Semi-popular on TikTok for being a sweet & funny guy and also for casually mentioning insane things that happened and never elaborating (“yeah sorry I was absent I got kidnapped because my dumbass friend wanted to play cards with a gang leader, that guy better be grateful”).

Reiji and Eiji: have the same social media Kamui does, and hype him up on it (/occasionally bemoan how lame he is) but also do their own things.

Morikawa: Tumblr user, fully believes the wizard blogs are real wizards. Gets anons from people like “I want to study you” all the time & he always misses the point and makes it into “the Morikawa vanguard school is always open to new students because I am the greatest teacher ever”. After meeting her, a lot of his posts start focusing on Kourin and his followers have an equivalent experience to when someone you’ve followed suddenly turns into a K-pop blog with absolutely no explanation. Kind of famous just because of how fucking weird he is. He also has Snapchat but is like really bad at taking pictures so everything he sends/posts is blurry or at a bad angle, but unironically. Had no interest in any other social media until he heard Kourin had Instagram and Twitter, at which point he downloaded them both and immediately started posting about her.

Izaki: Twitter user /derogatory (sorry Izaki but I know this in my heart to be true. He’s gotta have some red flags to have stayed friends with Morikawa this long). Also has Snapchat and tries (and fails) to help Morikawa take better pictures. Kamui frequently bullies him about losing their streak, which since they’re not actually that close is probably their main form of communication. Izaki’s not totally convinced that Kamui actually knows his NAME, so he’s confused about why he cares so much (it’s bc Kamui has a Snapchat streak with literally everyone he knows who 1. has Snapchat and 2. does streaks). Also possibly has an Instagram where he occasionally gets influxes of followers when he’s tagged in pictures with his more famous friends, but some of them probably don’t think he’s that interesting and soon unfollow (lmao rip)

Emi: does not have social media in the main series but gets an Instagram by G era (when Kamui finds this out he suddenly downloads Instagram even though he has never expressed an interest in it before, and thus so does Nagisa, somehow sensing what Kamui has done).

Nagisa: has Twitter only so she can follow Kamui (again, she is too young for Twitter). Kamui has her blocked but she can still somehow sense when someone’s arguing with him & she comes into their replies like “leave my man alone!!” I would not be surprised if she doxxed people tbh. She keeps getting banned but somehow every time she appeals it the ban is lifted (Kamui suspects dark magic). Also downloads Instagram in G era after Kamui does (how does she know he got it if he didn’t tell her??? She has her ways).

Kourin: has an official ultrarare Instagram and Twitter where she promotes her idol work, and also a private Instagram and Twitter where she posts pictures of her friends and nerds out about vanguard and thoroughly logically dismantles stupid people. Once she posted a stupid meme making fun of Kai on her official ultrarare Twitter instead of her personal one by accident and fully freaked out trying to take it down before the fans screenshotted it (she wasn’t successful bc idol fans are crazy and ended up saying she was hacked) (Kai will never admit it but he thought it was funny). She probably has Morikawa blocked on every platform.

Rekka: an instagram girlie FOR SURE. She posts often and sticks to a cutesy aesthetic, and is wildly popular. She’s also very into Snapchat, both in terms of doing streaks with people and live-blogging funny bits of her day on her story. Probably also spends a lot of time on Pinterest & has a lot of Pinterest boards for every situation.

Suiko: I’ll be real I have no idea. I feel like she either has no social media at all and just like guest appears on Kourin and Rekka’s, or has like official instagram/twitter accounts with tons of followers that she semi-maintains and weird shitposty anonymous accounts where she just posts whatever comes to her brain. Tbh I can see her stirring the pot so she can observe Kamui into getting into more twitter beef just to see what happens. Redditor??? She is a mystery to me.

Kenji: has Tumblr & like 60% of it is dedicated to Ancient Rome, 30% of it is about vanguard, and the last 10% is just him reblogging like feminist stuff and positive messages. A wife guy without actually having a wife or realizing he’s a wife guy (posts a lot about “his friend” - Yuri - bc he just thinks she’s neat, but his followers seem to think he’s in love with her for some reason???). Cries when people on tumblr celebrate the ides of March. Probably has been cancelled for unironically stanning Caesar. Also has an official Instagram but doesn’t post on there much, when he’s there he’s usually just there to like his friends’ posts and log back off. People are surprised by his lack of social media and have not connected his tumblr (where he stays completely anonymous thank you very much, he is Not a fan of the attention) to him, and are always begging him to post more on his Instagram/get more social media, but when Yuri and Gai bring this up hes like no <3 I will not <3

Yuri: she’s a YouTuber for sure & she has helpful videos on deck building, strategy, how to stay calm under pressure, etc. Occasionally she includes her teammates or people from other teams in her videos (Aichi featured in one once and now her fans regularly ask for him to come back lol). She also has an official Instagram and Twitter, and runs most of the official Team Caesar accounts on various platforms. Yuri and Misaki are tumblr mutuals, and she is aware of Koutei’s tumblr (bc they’re both in the vanguard tag a lot and who else would be THAT obsessed with Julius Caesar. She’s no fool, she recognized it was him instantly) but she thinks it’s funny to not tell him it’s her (+ she’s kind of embarrassed in a fond way/thinks he might be embarrassed about the posts abt her if he knew) so she just scrolls through his nice posts abt her when she’s having a bad day.

Gai: tiktok famous for generally being a chill dude who’s willing to answer your vanguard questions but mostly for posting Team Caesar behind the scenes videos, which range from Yuri being mad at one or both of them to them doing challenges/playing games together, to some of their movie star stuff in G, to one particularly memorable video where he just stared at the camera while Yuri and Koutei were being in love with each other and (at least in Koutei’s part) oblivious to it in the background.

Ren: pre-season 1 he had no social media except an Instagram account and a Snapchat, both of which he used to post an ongoing stream of whatever was in his brain so that Tetsu and Kai would see it. After The Breakup™️ he went private and posted a lot of stuff about revenge, and being stronger, etc (which was no use since Kai had him blocked and he was not popular pre-Asteroid era, so pretty much only tetsu saw his posts). Also he’s DEFINITELY a Reddit user lmao. Post-season 1 Asaka got him into tiktok which he immediately became famous on, he joined Twitter which had a preconception of him due to the way he acted during season 1 and so he gets cancelled every other week for a while (eventually they mostly get used to his new personality and the way he says the weirdest shit), and he rebooted his Instagram to be public and deleted most of the old revenge posts (he probably leaves one up just to cause controversy lmao). Often leaves Kyou on read on Snapchat, but whether that’s on purpose or an accident is anybody’s guess. Actually he probably would have tumblr too & be kinda infamous bc his personality would definitely make him popular here tbh. He runs a “official ren suzugamori” blog but he never acknowledges he’s on tumblr anywhere else and everyone thinks it’s just a fake parody blog.

Asaka: tiktok famous for being hot, on team asteroid, and if she’s feeling generous for answering people’s vanguard questions (with a special focus on the Pale Moon of course). Probably also has a sizable following on Instagram. Lords her amount of followers over Misaki who pretends she doesn’t care but early seasons Misaki was actually a little annoyed by this.

Kyou: had a Twitter. Keeps getting banned from Twitter and making new accounts and the cycle repeats. Doesn’t have a tiktok but is tiktok famous anyways for always appearing in team asteroid videos in the weirdest ways (disguised as a potted plant. Scaled the building and can be seen inaudibly yelling in the background through the window on the third floor of team asteroid headquarters. Parachuting down from an airplane. Etc). When people comment about him on Ren’s videos he’s always like “who?” “I don’t see him?” or “huh, that guy looks vaguely familiar…” and when people comment about him on Asaka’s videos she refuses to name him but always says something about how much she hates that guy. Has Snapchat but about half the cast either leaves him on opened/read or straight up has him blocked (he Does take really interesting pictures though, and it’s cool to see all the places he goes! How does he have the money for all this??? Nobody knows).

Tetsu: runs “official team asteroid” accounts, including a YouTube on which Ren is IMMENSELY popular despite not being the account owner. Known for being intimidating on Twitter, and also for (one-sided tbh) twitter beef with Kamui (who would @ him like HEY ASSHOLE ACKNOWLEDGE ME >:/ & Tetsu would just ignore him) in earlier canon. He doesn’t actually use any of his accounts that much besides the YouTube and to publish official updates about team asteroid, but - though he’ll never admit it - he’s a fan of terrible memes. He asked what Asaka was laughing at once and she showed him a vanguard meme (“I don’t know if you’ll get it though”) and he excused himself and went to another room to laugh (Asaka was like ???).

#cleaning out drafts!! oh my god this has been in here for ages…I’m so bad at posting shit #morikawa and nagisa probably both have at least one account with an embarassing kourin or kamui themed name #if they weren’t fucking insane and utterly disinterested in anyone that’s not the person they’re obsessed with they could bond over that #cfv #do I really want to tag everyone. that’s so many people…#sigh. here we go.#sendou aichi #kai toshiki #tokura misaki #katsuragi kamui #suzugamori ren #shinjou tetsu #miwa taishi #uno reiji #saga eiji #morikawa katsumi #izaki yuta #sendou emi #daimonji nagisa #tatsunagi kourin #tatsunagi rekka #tatsunagi suiko #mitsusada kenji #usui yuri #usui gai #narumi asaka #yahagi kyou #anyways I don’t even know if this is good but it’s been sitting in my drafts for like 83 years so out into the world it goes

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wolverineheight · 1 month

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batman body piercing au that i wrote with @quanxisgirlfriend in the pub under the cut

Shops

Bruce’s shop

Bruce: the only APP studio in Gotham, goes to the conference every year. Set his shit up with his parents’ money so doesn’t actually need to worry about bringing in profit, apprenticed under Ra’s

Favourite piercing: Antitragus

Dick: Bruce’s first apprentice, left to open his own studiowork in Bludhaven but still guest spots

Favourite piercing: Antinavel

Jason: Has had so many fucking needle sticks that Bruce tried to get him to quit. Ends up setting up his own studio down the road and sets his prices marginally lower to snipe Bruce’s clients

Favourite piercing: Snug, microdermal

Tim: Really good but so annoying. Tells clients about bevel theory as he’s piercing. They do not care

Favourite piercing: Rhino

Damien: Refuses to do any piercing that isn’t artsy fartsy (reasonable), LOVES unique anatomy piercings, terrible bedside manner but really skilled. Bruce can’t put him on reception because he’ll turn people down if he doesn’t like them.

Favourite piercing: Septril

Steph: Fantastic piercer and really picky about clients. Really loves to perform surface piercings. Has a list of people she’s kicked out of the studio for having “bad vibes” (she’s always right about this). Gossips at the desk of the Rogue shop sometimes and loves to visit Babs. Babs’s pincushion when she’s learning.

Favourite piercing: Sternum

Cas: Ear only, does elaborate ear maps that take years to get through, has a very loyal clientele and rarely takes on new clients because she’s so booked out. Anatometal ONLY. Orders in custom jewellery

Favourite piercing: ROOK!!!

Duke: So anxious. Starts off working reception and takes a while to work up not because he’s not skilled but because he constantly second guesses himself

Favourite piercing: Forward helix

Carrie: Is good and wants to hop ship to Ivy’s studio because she’s sick of the men she interacts with daily.

Favourite piercing: Eyebrow or single side lip.

Joker shop

Joker: Does navels standing up. Drops the needle on the ground when he’s done. Saw trap ass sharps bin, only closes it when it’s full to the brim. Externally threaded steel jewellery is all he buys. He charges $50 for a pair of lobes. Doesn’t own an autoclave, thinks alcohol is fine. Tells clients to use undiluted tea tree only. Keeps the same gloves for the entire process.

Favourite piercing: Lobes bc he uses a gun

Harley: did a psychology undergrad but didn’t finish, got with the joker and agreed to apprentice under him instead, he drove her literally insane. She hated it so much she just thought the job would not be for her but then couldn’t go back to college so agreed to work with ivy.

Favourite piercing: Rims because she can get them done in 3 minutes or less.

One hundred million revolving apprentices that end up leaving due to poor work ethic.

Rogue shop

Riddler: Not APP qualified because he sees himself as better than them. Skilled but does NOT take criticism. Tells people riddles to take their minds off the piercings which works weirdly well. Does not do oral piercings bc of saliva. Doesn’t let anyone else near the autoclave.

Favourite piercing: Stacked lobe

Scarecrow: Obsessed with history and relationship with queer culture, likes the fear element (weirdo)

Favourite piercing: Nasallang

Croc: bad at it. Left Joker’s studio and lied on his CV. Floundering constantly but refuses to admit or ask for help.

Favourite piercing: Nose

Penguin: Leaves for a cig break every ten minutes. Not allowed to sterilise jewellery because he’ll smoke while he does.

Favourite piercing: Septum

Ivy’s shop

Ivy: spiritual/cultural piercings, has incense on constantly, does scarification too, studio is too new to be certified but works to APP standard. Thinks Bruce is too up himself and won’t collaborate with him on anything, doesn’t let men pierce in her studio and lets the others pierce male clients.

Favourite piercing: Septum

Harley (post-joker): learns to love the job again due to wlw tendencies and having a safe environment, great with kids and specialises in kids lobes. Gains huge clientele by having sessions where she listens to your issues and pierces you therapeutically.

Favourite piercing: Lobe

Babs: Was offered a place in Bruce’s studio but turned it down to work here. Very skilled, likes to pierce daiths and industrials.

Favourite piercing: Dahlia

Characters

Harvey: health inspector and bad at it. Sometimes very thorough and others lets things slide, somehow always lets things slide for the Joker

Ra’s: taught Bruce but refuses to be APP certified which is their main conflict

Tommy Elliot: works at a beauticians and thinks using guns makes him a piercer. Has filler. Favourite piercing: Rim but he does them with guns

Bane: works at Claires :)

Eddie: Too afraid of rejection for any surface piercings, obsessive about healing, sleeps on his back but wakes up all over the place and stresses about things shifting when he wakes up on his ear, everything in pairs. Piercings: Symmetrical, paired brows, paired nostrils, 6x rims with rings per side, fwd helixes both sides, tragus both sides, flat each side with question mark labs, venom

Jonathan: Weird about it all, experimental. Piercings: Antinavel (doesn’t have the anatomy for traditional), three lobes on one side, tongue, double conch (low and high, both 1.6), single vertical helix that he wears a plain titanium barbell in. all his jewellery is plain titanium, bcrs if rings but he prefers labs or curved bars for everything but his lobes.

Harley: Piercings: angel fangs w/ one black one red ball, tongue that’s wonky because she didn’t have the proper anatomy so it’s angled, smiley, double lobe and paired stacks, can’t heal cartilage for shit but has a conch and 3 rims anyway, isn’t allowed a rook even though she wants one, paired eyebrows with cones, septum (full hinged, maybe with a mandala design). all are titanium with ONLY acrylic balls and cones for the colours :). 18cm stretched lobes w/ either opal tunnels or hangers

Joker: Piercings: fucking snake eyes AND frog eyes. Snakebites with barbells instead of labrets, his teeth are FUCKED. Wonky as fuck navel, hand webs, wrist dermals, pierced his own tongue traditionally initially and didn’t have the anatomy so pierced straight through a vein but refused to take it out or go to hospital so nearly went septic. All slime green glow in the dark acrylic and cheap “bioflex” bars

Ivy: Piercings: none but visible patterned scarification on her arms and back

#my shit #batman #batfam #we are. not normal

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gunsli-01 · 1 year

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Oh, I saw it now- i swear on my fucking life if I jump into Mikoto's tag one more got damn time for the top post to be talking about how he's bad rep. I'm gonna fucking lose it. Don't make me set friendly fire on and start sniping all your faves egos. Cause news flash no one here is representing anything well. So, get that shit off my lawn and outta the tag. "He's bad rep though" to you mother fucker to you I'm having a great time though.

Does anyone ever consider that just because a character has a certain diagnosis it doesn't mean the authors are saying everyone with said thing acts that way? That not all people who have certain diagnoses act and experience it in the same way. Especially when it comes down to something as personal and individualized as mental health. There's a difference between this doesn't properly represent your experience and it being bad representation overall.

Stop being dicks. Like damn the ableism is super thick in these streets.

From how everyone turned on Haruka because he wasn't the perfect definition of a victim anymore and needed to be put back in his place despite giving him a pass last trial cause the fanbase assumed he was autistic. Despite his second mv literally showing him undergoing more abuse. To giving Yuno a fucking free innocent verdict solely based on the bastardized politicization of her trial as literally every bit of information giving to us was ignored in favor of a moral high ground debate made by fucking charlatans. It's easy to sniff out the same self-righteous nonsense when it comes to Mikoto having d.i.d. People going he's not good rep because he's a murderer but Mu's a sapphic queen despite having murdered the girl she was interested in okay, alright, got ya.

Fuck off. Like I said when this information came out it's real funny how half the fandom graduated with a doctorate in psychology as soon as this information dropped. I didn't know this place was full of specialist in this field. Holy shit good on us. Now if only we had some detectives in our midst then maybe we could actually deduce the real facts of the situation presented to us instead of coming up with knee-jerk reactions based off feeling oriented pseudo-science.

#milgram #milgram mikoto

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khorren · 1 year

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Order of Whispers babble

I always picture the Order of Whispers an as an organisation not of wacky hijinks spy missions, but the training for it is actually pretty brutal as you go further up the ranks. I know it’s easy to sort of gloss over the mass genocide the Commander does on a daily basis but I think to get past anything above Agent you’re gonna have to do some real fucky shit and have some very unethical and questionable things happen to you / do them to other people. Sure a Whispers-Commander got the titles of Lightbringer relatively quickly, but I’m sure at some point you got pulled aside and were told “Look, I know this happened. A lot was going on. But you and I really need to have a long, uncomfortable talk about what it means to be a Lightbringer”

It reminds me of a scene in one of the more recent Bond films, where Bond first gets his 00 status having killed 2 people in cold blood. And the idea of an established agent having to go through that sounds well…. “Fun” is not the right word, but from a writing/world building stance, yeah it sounds interesting? An avenue to explore? Whatever. I’m sure writers get excited about all kinds of weird shit in the name of their craft. Also bouncing off the TV show Nikita in which the recruits don’t get the title of “Agent” until they’ve done the deed in a kill mission. God that show was terrible but entertaining.

Anyway! Initiates and Agents perform at various levels and do various tasks within the Order so they probably haven’t had assassination orders, but definitely were assets in a mission to do just that. And to go through the training required one needs to be “hardened”. We’re not talking about emotionless zombies or anything, emotion is still a valuable weapon in an agent’s toolbelt, but some weird-ass training definitely took place so these higher-ranked individuals don’t crack.

My Whispers kids - I felt like posting something with pictures.

Roisin is deep undercover into Priory business and had to undergo a lot of training not to crack under pressure. The slightest micro-expression had to be trained out of her. She’s there to essentially make friends and then abuse their trust in horrible ways. If she has to kill, she will, but she’d rather not kill a librarian / knowledge seeker yaknow?

Sienna was suuuper young when thrown into the Whispers. She was 11 and while she wasn’t given missions, she was just being looked after, she saw the outcome of a lot of things that young kids probably shouldn’t see. It was all presented very matter of fact and this is how the world works. Now she’s tasked with taking the Commander out if she becomes an issue. (They’re best friends btw!)

Isla straight up gets recruited for her sniping skills. “Hey wanna keep doing what you’re doing, get paid for it, and have a global organisation watch your back?” Sure. Sounded handy.

Yhalea, while still part of the Inquest, joins the Whispers for an intel gathering mission. Stays long enough to get promoted to Agent, finishes the job, then promptly forgets about being in the Whispers. Leaves the Inquest. Forms a Krewe.

Allianora joined hoping to find secret records of Kurzick things and hoped the Order would be the catalyst to get her back to Cantha one day. If anyone could sneak into Cantha it would be the global network of spies. Allianora knows the family history and what her ancestors have had to do to survive.

And of course, Serenity. Joined the Order young of her own choice (so she thought), and was already doing stuff with them before the start of the personal story. Being Commander she has no qualms in taking out who she needs to take out. But then of course isn’t handling that well at all post-season 4 / post EoD. So that’s a whole bucket full of trauma to digest.

#gw2 #order of whispers #guild wars 2 #character babbles

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incarnateirony · 2 years

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btw if anyone else wants to join in on the Big Name Fan big game hunt over the next few weeks and is going to conventions, lmk. i already got my setups but the more the merrier.

let's take out the trash. I never cared about cons because actually helping the show was more important, but the show doesn't need that anymore. Now we just clear out the rot so it doesn't assail new fans.

you guys wanna cut people for ruining your entitlement? that's cute.

these kids fuck up a lot. it wasn't hard to snipe gayle and suzanne with their act. No actual violence needed, unlike them. I just love the flare of them realizing there are, in fact, people that are not afraid of their shit, and that for all of their talk, they're the fearful cowards.

That said if anyone else wants to be a post DM me, we're about to start catching every violation.

youtube

#there's a message for all of you in the war room #it's open season motherfuckers #arm yourself a storm is coming #well kid what you gonna do now?#it's your reflection looking back to pull you down #not a cult #a syndicate #how's them kneecaps feeling buddies #i got another crowbar #Youtube

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stuckylibrary · 2 years

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Group Ask 188

What is a group ask?

Previous Group Asks

AO3 Search Tutorial

Please reply to this post if you know one of the fics mentioned in this ask. Thank you so much in advance!

Anonymous 1 asked:

hi!! thank you so much for having this amazing place to find fics and recs yall are absolutely angels :)) ive been having trouble finding this fic and ive been looking for days and its one were modern bucky is army affiliated and him and the howlies show up and help the avengers fight this female villain and take the weapon she used to control them back to the army as a favor to a general instead of handing it to the avengers? i distinctly remember bucky sniping the ground in front of steve ty!!

Anonymous 2 asked:

So, can you help me find an au stucky fic where Steve is a copy and Bucky keeps trying to make their sex life kinky but it never works out. But then he forgets to pay for something and Steve spanks him for it. And Bucky realises how kinky Steve can be. Please tell me if you find that fic.

Anonymous 3 asked:

Hello I'm looking for a fic please, it was a Oneshot, ABO, with OmegaBucky who is gonna start his heat in Wakanda, so Shuri calls Steve.He is worried bc Buck didnt call him but remembers his kiss with Sharon, so he explains Buck that kiss was just to make him jeaous, that he is the only 1 he loves. So they spend the heat together. In the epilogue Steve smells Buck & founds he's pregnant. I think it was just recently deleted or something bc it was in my bookmarks but its no there no more.

Anonymous 4 asked:

this is such a long shot but 3 yrs ago, i got a tattoo in russian saying принадлежать, or “to belong”. its from a fic (tws era) i read where tony snarkily asks a recently un-brainwashed, still very traumatised bucky sth like “what would YOU know about desire, what do you want most in life then?” & bucky says “to belong” in russian (then dramatically exits). i couldnt find the fic anymore for the exact phrase when i was getting tatted. if anyone can, ill be forever indebted. lots of love.

Anonymous 5 asked:

Hey! I’m looking for a modern au fic. This might be a long shot, since I don’t remember much else from the fic. But there was a scene where Bucky and Rumlow were exes and Rumlow had Bucky’s cat so they snuck into his apartment to get it back.

Anonymous 6 asked:

Hey! There’s a fic I’m looking for, it’s was pre war,& Bucky & Steve were pining after each other. Repressed feelings& all that. I can only remember one scene from it. Bucky had a date with a girl& they went back to her place to hook up, & I vividly remember she said “we can have sex but you ain’t going in the front door” so they did anal, & Bucky was like wow okay. & then while having sex w her he was like holy shit I could do this with Steve 👀 & then couldn’t think straight around Steve after

Anonymous 7 asked:

hi, do you guys know the name of this fic where steve and bucky get into an argument and bucky goes to hide out at a friend's apartment. steve and iron man then break down the friend's apartment door later cause steve thinks bucky might be in danger. steve is definitely cap, but bucky might be a modern bucky. thank you!

scottiemp4 asked:

howdy friends, i was wondering if you could help me out. i’m looking for a fic with injuried/kidnapped steve. i remember steve was at the Raft or something similar, maybe Hydra? anyways he had been experimented on and had surgery preformed on him while awake and other crazy stuff. when the team found him it was sam and tony who went in and sam was freaking out bc he though steve was gonna die and they couldn’t figure out how to move him bc his back was fucked up. thank you so much!

Anonymous 8 asked:

I'm looking for a fic where Bucky works at a hospital (maybe mount sinai, ny?) while Steve is in the army. They used to be either together or even married but then they broke up because Steve had re-enlisted without even telling Bucky (who found out about it a few days before Steve had to leave again maybe?) and in the end they get back together. xxxx

Anonymous 9 asked:

first: thank you for all the work you do with this blog! second: i'm looking for a fic but i don't remember much at all so it might be too vague. 1) steve and bucky become guardians of natasha 2) possibly a "both are winter soldier" situation or something, i think they saved nat from red room, and they go on missions 3) i think they pretend they're "normal" but natasha knows they're not? (at least some of it is natasha pov) hope you can help!

butterybones asked:

Hey I’ve been looking for this fic where Bucky has one arm and gets jumped after going to a bar, so Steve takes care of him for a few days and Steve’s dog had been stealing Bucky’s newspaper? Any help would be appreciated!

padsandmoonyagainsttheworld asked:

Hey I don’t have much to go on but there’s a fic where Tony and Bucky don’t get along cuz Tony thinks Bucky should’ve held out against the torture like he did until they find a file or something of what happened to Bucky and then Tony says something like “What they did to me was not that” and he forgives Bucky. Do you have any idea what I’m talking about lol?

Anonymous 10 asked:

Hiya! I'm looking for a story where steve comes out at pride, he tells the crowd he loved bucky but never said and a few years later when bucky comes back steve goes to pride again and tells the crowd he's too chicken to say anything. Thanks anyone who might be able to help!

rosegoldyves asked: /others

hi, so I’ve been looking for a long time but couldn’t find the fic where Bucky finds stucky fanfic and starts considering a relationship with Steve but Steve takes time warming up. They move to a house together but their relationship seems to go nowhere since Steve is hesitant to reciprocate so Bucky starts seeing this other guy. Sorry if I am bungling up the premise.

ohmyshax asked:

Hi there! I need help finding a fic -- I've tried so many searches on AO3, using different search parameters, but no luck. It's a short WW2 oneshot. Outsider POV (didn't see it in your tags tho) of a soldier freaking out when his Sergeant (Bucky) disagrees with a visiting Captain America. He later finds out, after the others arrive, that Bucky is part of the Howlies, and that he was only there to train the POV character to take over as sergeant. Hope you know it. Thank you for the help!

#group asks

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palettepainter · 3 years

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How the teachers play favourites

We all know Aizawa and All Might have their favourite UA child, Shinsou and Midoryia. And yeah I know Bakugo and Todoroki are also their UA kids but shhh, Midoryia and Shinsou where the first UA kids they adopted.

And you can’t tell me Aizawa and All Might play favourites with them, All makes Deku lunch like..hello?? Aizawa gave Shinsou his capture weapon, HELLO??

So here are some dumb headcannons for how the other teachers play favourites to their UA kids

Ectoplasm and his UA kid Jiro:

-When he gives back marked tests he’ll sometimes write small encouraging notes for his students to read, he does this to some students when he feels they need a pick up but he always leaves a positive one on Jiro’s

-During lessons where students are allowed to study in the lesson Ectoplasm lets them listen to music on their phones, everyone thought he would say no so everyone - mostly Kaminari and Mineta - peer pressured Jiro to ask. To no ones shock except Jiro’s Ectoplasm replied with a calm “Sure, but only if you use your headphones”

-Jiro talks about new songs that have been released and Ectoplasm will listen to her geek out about music

-Sometimes Jiro will tell Ectoplasm what her and the rest of the band (herself, Kaminari, Momo, Tokoyami and Bakugo) have been doing and if they’re working on any new songs in-between their studies. Jiro jokes that Ectoplasm is their biggest fan but Ecto is genuinely supportive of their band and admires their creativity

-Jiro once entered maths class and said “Hey miter Ecto, what’s shakin’ bacon?” and while the whole class was stood there in silence thinking Ectoplasm wouldn’t reply he said “Not much double dutch” and then Jiro went to her desk as thought nothing out of the ordinary happened. Kaminari tried to do the same thing to him and Ectoplasm just went “Kaminari your shoe lace is undone-” Jiro was very amused

Powerloader and Hatsume:

-This one started out more like this - Powerloader: Who’s idiot kid is that?....*realises it’s Hatsume* Oh shit- THAT’S MY IDIOT KID-

-Hatsume showed up at the design studio and never left basically, so Powerloader got used to her. He knows Hatsume overworkers herself so he keeps spare energy bars, fruit and bags of crisps in the design studio. He brought a small microwave and kettle for the winter so Hatsume could make hot drinks and food since she insisted on finishing her ‘babies’

-Say’s he doesn’t worry but still insists she goes to recovery girl when she gets a scratch or blows up the studio, sometimes dragging her there himself, ranting all the way about how she’s an idiot. One day Hatsume ended up breaking her leg during a bad explosion and Powerloader very nearly had a heart attack-

He kept a close eye on her while she worked from a wheelchair at her desk

-Makes her wear a god forsaken jumper in the winter when the design studio is freezing, stupid dumb teenager you’ll catch your death of cold

Present Mic and Kaminari:

-This man is shameless with playing favourites

-He greets Kaminari with his signature finger guns and an enthusiastic “AAAYYYY KAMINARI!” Kaminari shoots finger guns back with an “Ayyyyy teach hozit hanging?!” Everyone in class knows Kaminari is a teachers pet despite how Kaminari insists he’s not

-Mic knows Kaminari has a crush on Jiro and Kaminari is an embaressed child who is like “omg msiter Mic STOP-” while Present Mic is coeing and being all like “Aw that’s adorable!”. He always puts Jiro and Kaminari together in group projects, Kaminari shoots him a flustered glare cuz Present Mic knows what he’s doing

-Kaminari teaches him meme/slang language for laughs and everyone in class hates it, Kaminari finds it hilarious. Eventually Mic gets the hang of it but he sucked at using the language correctly at first

-Calls him lil listener and Kaminari calls him loud mouth

Midnight and Yaoyorozu

-Another teacher who is shameless with playing favourites

-Midnight being a teacher does have to enforce the dress code if she sees a student wearing their uniform incorrectly - loose tie, untucked shirt, odd brightly coloured socks, chockes, etc. Midnight really doesn’t care all that much if a student’s socks aren’t the sae colour as their shoes...buuut she’s a teacher so she has to enforce it. Except when it comes to Yaoyorozu. Yaoyorozu one day had to wear light blue socks into UA as her tights where damaged, and she was worried she’d be called out for not following the dress code. Midnight saw, and turned a blind eye. She was in the middle of telling someone off for not dressing correctly, saw Yaoyorozu with the odd coloured socks and went “-Oh hello Yaoyorozu you have a good day sweetheart! ^^”

-Always complients Yaoyorozu when she comes into class. Oooo did you try a new hair style? Honey it suits you! New note book, such cursive hand writting! Glad to see you got those new pair of shoes, trying a different shoe brand this time? Very stylish!

-Had been tempted to kick Mineta like a beech ball on more then one occasion when he wouldn’t back off from Yaoyorozu

-The kind of teacher to say “I taught her that~” when Yaoyorozu uses one of her combat techniques

-Girl gossip. She tries to guess who Yaoyorozu will get with, meanwhile Momo is just blushing and blabbering because that isn’t very appropriate for history work. Midnight bats a hand is like “Pft I’m the teacher I can gossip in my own lesson”. Puts her with Todoroki during group projects and she, like Mic, 100% knows what she’s doing

Hounddog and Shishida

-Hounddog: I am not soft....*holds up Shishida* EXCEPT FOR MY 1B CHILD WHO IS VERY STRONG AND HE’S GOING TO BE A HERO DON’T @ ME HE’S AMAZING-

-Encourages Shishida to let loose with his beast form, with his rish upbringing Shishida isn’t used to embracing his more wild and uncaring side, having been raised to always be propper and polite when not in combat. Hounddog geuenily puts in effort to be a little less grumbly around Shishida cuz he doesn’t wanna peer pressure him, he’s giving him time

-Keeps a spare cloth so Shishida can clean his glasses off when and if they get dirty from training

-I imagine Shishida having a quirk called beast and having a more posh upbringing prolly has a little bit of anxiety, having to always be polite and propper even with a quirk called Beast. Sometimes he vents to Hounddog about this and he listens, insisting that it’s better Shishida get it off his chest when he apologises for drowning on

-During training Hounddog basically throws him about like a beanie bag at first, Shishida was still a kid and Hounddog had years of experience. The day Shishida finally knocked him down with a hard punch to the side of Hounddog’s face he felt...bad. But Hounddog was beaming! Shishida may have cried a little bit

Snipe and Hagakure (picked hagakure inspired by a suggestion @snipe-enthusiast made a while ago)

- Protective af

-Hagakure screams the innocent dorky girl of 1A, and thought Snipe makes sure none of the girls deal with Mineta’s bull while he’s around he’s especially protective of Hagakure just cuz...well, have you seen the way she acts? She’s innocent, peppy, happy, cheerful, and Snipe does not want that tainted by Mineta’s preverted ways

-After the exam with Hagakure and Shoji Snipe apologized for what happened and so did Hagakure, admitting that she over-reacted.

-Hagakure admits one day to Snipe that she’s worried she won’t make it as a hero cuz her quirk isn’t flashy like her classmates. Snipe reassures her by saying that no one thought he could be a hero when he was little (this headcannon was inspired by @frelmidja and a post this did with Snipe) - guns weren’t exactly considered heroic and he got teased in the beginning when his quirk first activated. He told Hagakure to keep working hard and that she had the potential and the drive to be a hero, Hagakure was very thankful for the reassurance

-Hagakure really wants to see what Snipe’s face is like and constantly asks him if he could take his mask off and show them, Snipe has yet to break and take off his mask but Hagakure is very persistant

Cementoss and Bondo

-Chill babies, they sit and have tea together.

-I imagine Bondo to be the kind of person to accidentally call Cementoss dad, it happened once during one on one training and he got so embarrassed. Cementoss kept telling him it was fine but Bondo left in a hurry after

-Bondo tried to make certian shapes out of his glue one time but ended up getting himself stuck, Cementoss helped him out and reassured a disheartened Bondo that everyone makes mistakes and that he was progressing well

-Being one of the taller boys in 1B he often has to hold back Monoma from going over to 1A when Kendo isn’t around, often tries to diffuse conflict before it gets worse, Cementoss is very proud

-After one on one training the two go to the lunch hall to get a hot drink after cleaning themselves up, Bondo tries to bring a different type of tea sweet each time - something like biscuits or chocolate. Cementoss returns the favour by bringing Bondo manju to have after his training

Thirteen + Gunhead and Uraraka

-Proud mum and dad because I couldn’t decide between the two

-Uraraka researches into the affects of zero gravity and how to better use her power, due to this she’s become a bit of a space nut and enjoys thinks like star gazing. When she was a kid and saw Pro Hro Thirteen on the TV she was ecstatic! Her parents brought her a Pro Hero Thirteen plush on her seventh birthday, Uraraka still has that toy. One day the toy got misplaced in the students washing and got mixed up with the teachers, Thirteen was a bit confused why a plush of her - and a well loved one by how old it looked - ended up in the wash. Uraraka hurridly rushes over to explain when Thirteen comes into the students dorms asking if it belonged to anyone. When Uraraka explained she got it when she was younger cuz she’s a big fan of Thirteen...heart squeeze

-Asked Uraraka if she could teach her the gunhead martial arts move, Uraraka was so honored she got to teach one of her idols a combat move! Through the gunhead martial arts move Thirteen met Gunhead and the two become good friends

-One day when Gunhead is teaching Thirteen the martial arts move with Uraraka to help demonstrate Uraraka wanted to take a picture of them all together. Gunhead was too tall to fit into the picture so he kneeled down to be at the same height as Thirteen and Uraraka (he did bunny ears behind Thirteen’s head and Uraraka thought it was adorable)

-Gunhead pretty much puts two and two together with Uraraka having a crush on Midoryia, so one day when Thirteen mentions in passing conversation how giddy Uraraka gets when she’s around this one green haired kid Gunhead just chuckles behind his hand. Thirteen and Gunhead think it’s very sweet how Uraraka totally has a crush on him (unlike Mic and Midnight thoug they don’t force anything and let Uraraka figure things out on her own)

#MHA #MHA UA #UA Teachers #Teachers #Ectoplasm #Snipe #Midnight #Mic #Present Mic #Thirteen #Gunhead #Students #UA child #headcannons

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ali-kitkat · 3 years

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Strangeness and Charm

MGI 2021 One-Year Anniversary Gift Exchange

hello, im back for a little post for @khneltea you are the recipient for enemies to lovers and by gods i hope you like this! romantic, or well its implied, daminette enemies to lovers! also tagging @issaxcharlie as per requested in the server!

fic is under the cut!

Marinette understood that the bat team was sent to Paris to help her; now that it was just herself against Papillon, but she really wanted to kick Robin’s teeth in. She couldn’t stand him. He was a self-centered, entitled, little shit. How dare he come into her city and tell her how to do her job?

The akuma attacks had been sporadic since she had revoked Chat Noir’s miraculous and the only attack that had occurred since Robin and the rest of the bats had arrived was Mister Pigeon. However, if she was being honest with herself that hardly counted as an attack in her or anyone’s books anymore.

It took all of her self control to not throttle him on the rooftop, after she had cast the miraculous cure, when he said “If this is what qualifies as an attack for you, I would hate to see how you would fare against even one of Gotham’s villains.” She was livid, he had based his opinions on akuma attacks by one attack and one attack only.

He had only been in Paris for a week and this is how he treated her, because of one little flare up by their resident akuma magnet? He had no idea what even counted as an attack in Paris nowadays.

Mister Pigeon? Definitely not.

Siren? Absolutely.

Due to him being close to her in age, she had constantly paired up with him during her nightly patrols and she hated it. She wondered if this was his team's way of trying to get him to socialize or work on his people skills. If so, they were doing an absolutely shit job of it.

At this point she really had debated whether or not being on Batman’s shit list would be worth dangling Robin from the Eiffel Tower by his ankles. She could do it. She knows she could, she had done it before in fact, to Chat before she took his miraculous away from him. In the end, she decided that it wouldn’t be worth the trouble it would cause her; but if she did accidentally hit him with her yo-yo while patrolling with him that night, no one would be the wiser.

She elected to ignore the muttered curses and detoured from her usual route in an attempt to get away from the miserable bastard. Of course, Robin then scolded her for running away and being an inferior hero. At that point she decided to put even more distance between them, only to prevent herself from injuring a potential ally. If he could even be called that with his constant berating and demeanor.

It was then that she heard a scream, an akuma. Kwami, she hoped it wasn’t Sandboy again, especially since his usual appearances were during the night.

She cast a quick glance at Robin and decided to leave him be. She took off in the direction of the scream, he was preoccupied by something on his gauntlet, if the blue light it was emitting was an indicator. Besides she had been fighting akumas for years now, the last thing she needed was Robin’s attitude and chiding rather than his help.

He didn’t need to see her nightmares either if it was in fact Sandboy who was akumatized as well. Sure, she wasn’t exactly the same thirteen year old girl she was when she first started battling akumas but Robin certainly didn’t need any more ammunition to use against her.

He didn’t need to see that her nightmares were of herself, whispering in her ear, telling her to give up. That she was a failure, that she should just let Papillon have the miraculous. It would all be over, it wasn’t like she would remember that she was Ladybug anyways. Whatever wish he would make would erase the current timeline out of existence. She hated seeing it.

When she touched down on the street, the first thing she noticed was that it was empty. There was no sign of any akuma, no destruction or frozen bodies. There wasn’t anything, it was too empty, as if the people had just up and disappeared. It was incredibly unnerving.

Casting another look around, she saw something dart into the shadows of an alleyway. She jumped to a neighboring rooftop and looked down. There it was, the akuma. They didn’t look like anything special, no obnoxious colours or outrageous outfits. Just someone in a simple, sleek suit in muted colours, their hair tied back in a dark braid and a drooping butterfly mask that looked like ruined eyeliner.

They looked up and made eye contact. She flung herself back on the rooftop. The akuma’s eyes looked empty, there was no emotion or life in them. It was disconcerting.

She looked back down into the alleyway to try to get another read on the akuma. They were gone. She rose to her feet and looked around again, just in case she missed something.

“Well, well, well. Look at what we have here,” a low, gravelly voice called out. It sounded as if they had gargled glass. Marinette quickly turned around to see the akuma at the other end of the rooftop. “A little ladybug all alone. Let us see what kind of memories you hold, heroine.”

Then suddenly the akuma was in front of her, arm outstretched and their hand was pressed against her forehead. She watched as her memories played out in real time before her and the akuma. She watched as her memories played side by side, all at once. It was headache inducing.

Marinette saw the first friend she made in almost a decade. She saw Lila threaten her and her friendships. She saw the day she had met Tikki, and the day she had received guardianship of the miracle box from Fu. She watched as flashes of her homelife flashed by, the few happy memories of her parents before the bakery’s popularity increased, before they began to neglect her. Before Lila’s honeyed words ruined what little she had left of them.

She watched as memories of previous akuma attacks played out. Of how Chat Noir acted away from the crowds and cameras, how treated her like an object to be won rather than a person. She watched as she had scrubbed herself raw in the shower after he had touched her, as she scrubbed her teeth after he forced a kiss on her.

She watched as the attacks ended and her reunions with her friends had turned into screaming fits. The shouts of how she was flakey and that if she was just going to hang out with them only to ditch them halfway through their time together that they were no longer going to be friends anymore, that they were better off without her. She watched as Lila smiled from across the room, where she comforted her former friend. As Lila’s promises came to fruition.

She watched as her nightmares flashed by just as quick of her looking in the mirror, looking at the scars that the miraculous cure hadn’t healed. As her reflection had started to speak. That she should give up, let Papillon have the miraculous. That she wasn’t worth it, that she was all alone. As the whispered words of her former friends had joined in. She watched as images of Chat had appeared telling her that she was his and no one else’s.

She watched as she was left to pick up the pieces of her life.

Suddenly she was wrenched back and someone was holding her against their person. She could see one of the bat-themed vigilantes fighting against the akuma, it looked to be Red Hood with the way the streetlight was glinting off his helmet. She could hear herself breathing heavily and could feel the tears streaming down her face as she was swung away from the akuma.

When the person holding her landed on a different rooftop, she wrenched herself out of their arms. She hit the rooftop with a thud and scrambled as far away from them as she could possibly get; then she buried her face in her knees. She covered her ears with her hands, hoping to block out the unrelenting images of her memories and nightmares. She didn’t want to see or hear anything. She certainly didn’t want to see anyone’s pitying looks or hear their scorn. She just wanted to forget, this akuma was most definitely Papillon’s newest masterpiece.

She flinched when a hand settled on her shoulder and tried to inch away from it, without removing her hands from her ears. Unfortunately, the hand remained, grounding her ever so slightly. Finally she gave in and looked up. Robin was watching her, but rather than disdain or pity, his face was pinched with concern. She huffed out a laugh, it was weak and made Robin flinch. She shrugged his hand off and stood; she held her head high and wiped her tears away. Ignoring his questioning looks, she tossed her yo-yo out.

“Ladybug,” he said softly.

“Don’t. Whatever you have to say, keep it to yourself. I don’t care,” she croaked. She didn’t want to hear anything he had to say, she just wanted to be done with this night and its horrors.

“Ladybug,” he repeated. “Regardless of whatever you might think or feel, you are not alone. There are plenty of other heroes who know exactly how you feel, who have been exactly where you are.”

That stopped her in her tracks. Of course Robin of all people had seen her memories, her nightmares and her fears. She turned and glared at him, though she imagined it wasn’t all that effective. What with her tear streaked face and red eyes.

“I know how you feel,” Robin sighed and she deflated. “That your best is not enough, that you, yourself are not good enough. I have been in your shoes. I have felt alone.”

“Well, you certainly don’t act like it,” she sniped bitterly, closing in on herself.

“I apologize,” Robin stated.

“What?”

“I am sorry,” he repeated. “I realize that I may have come off as too brusque and in doing so have diminished your accomplishments.”

“Why?” she asked. “Why are you apologizing? You have nothing to be sorry for. You were right, I don’t know what I’m doing. I’m just playing at being a hero. My villain just found out my identity and so did all of you and your team.”

“That being, it was not, nor is it, your fault,” he replied. “I made assumptions of which I am at fault for, and of which caused the predicament of which you have found yourself in. You cannot quit or give up because of several imbeciles, because if you do, you let them win. You do not strike me as a sore loser, Ladybug.”

Marinette let out a laugh and watched as Robin’s expression shifted. He no longer looked concerned, but was now smiling wryly at her. She returned the smile. “Thank you Robin.”

“You are welcome,” he said. “Now I believe you have an akuma to take care of? Would you care for some assistance?”

“I would,” she replied.

“I look forward to working with you more,” he said, “Marinette.”

Marinette nodded, feeling her face flush at the way Robin said her name. “I do too Robin. I do too.”

#maribat #daminette #mgi 1 year anniversary #ali-kitkat's writing #ali-kitkat writes #i live

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the-vengeful-demon · 3 years

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As much as I love Striker, I’m seeing a lot of interpretations of him as a “revolutionary hero” type of character. Like his one and only goal is to help imp-kind. And I feel like that interpretation is kind of...wrong? Or at least missing something? Like, I think first and foremost Striker is out for himself. He comes across as very narcissistic and ambitious (in a self-serving way). I kind of mentioned this in a different post, but I might elaborate on that here.

Striker does hate the ruling class, but he also has an intense dissatisfaction with his own kind. His goal isn’t necessarily to get rid of the overlords and thus put all imps on top, but to get rid of the overlords and put himself on top. After all, he thinks that other imps are inferior to himself.

Striker is dissatisfied with his own species and this is made pretty clear in the episode. Or, at the very least, he has an extreme distaste for those he deems “weak”. We can’t be sure on what we saw from Striker was just a front, and what wasn’t. Except for his interactions with Moxxie, which we can assume were entirely honest. He immediately detests Moxxie for being weak. And we can assume that this extends to anyone weaker than himself. The only imp we see him have a prominent and positive relationship with is Blitzo. And he likes Blitzo specifically because of how different he is from other imps. He started his own business, he’s physically stronger, etc., etc. He’s everything other imps aren’t. But he still doesn’t respect Blitzo fully, as we see when he refers to him in front of Moxxie and Millie after capturing them. Also notice that when talking to Blitzo he says “we could be the most powerful beings in Hell”, specifically referring to just them two. Not “imps deserve better” or “we (imps in general) could be the most powerful beings”.

And I know a lot of people like to think that his talk with Blitzo, after he finds him trying to snipe Stolas, is like 100% sincere. But it has to be manipulative on some level. A minute before, he literally calls Blitzo a rodeo clown, and now he wants him on his side and to help him out? The whole ordeal comes across less as “Striker wants to help Blitzo, and that’s the only reason” and more as “Striker is an expert manipulator, who maybe pities Blitzo, but is mainly doing this for his own personal gain, whether that be to have a partner in crime or to buy himself time”. I mean, look at his facial expressions. He’s at first shocked, like “oh shit, I’m caught”.

But then he quickly changes to “I have an idea, or I can use this to my benefit”. Look at that shit-eating grin.

Boy just hatched a plan, and that kind of expression doesn’t at all look like “I’m going to help this person better themself”.

But anyways, my interpretation of Striker is that he’s dissatisfied with his species and resentful of other imps for being weak. He thinks himself better than other imps and 100% has a superiority complex. He hates the ruling class for holding power (potentially/partly over imps specifically) but he also hates his own kind for being weak and complacent in their lives. Striker resents what he is because his kind doesn’t have any power (physically, socially, politically etc.). And he hates those above him because they have power that he doesn’t want them to have; but it’s in more of a self-centered way, not a “I want better for my people” way. He wants the power, not all of imp-kind. He views other imps as inferior, and he views overlords as powerful trophy kills whose deaths increase his status.

#striker is not the rebel hero #who does occasional bad shit for The Cause #that you think he is #he's a narcissistic power hungry cowboy #but that's why i love him #he has so much more depth than people think #he's kind of like that deer from Beastars #?#a little bit?#idk i don't watch beastars #helluva boss #striker #helluva boss striker #helluva boss meta #blitzo #mymeta #mine

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chibivesicle · 3 years

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Golden Kamuy - Kikuta deserved better - 273-276

As I catch up on things, I’m gonna hit the highlights that really stuck with me. Ogata is able to escape from Vasily using the tactics he observed from the showdown in Barato with Hijikata cutting through random row houses. He’s seriously gotten into Vasily’s head as he hesitated to snipe aggressively after killing the wrong guy with Ogata’s cloak.

The only worthwhile thing from this continued and seriously a no longer interesting plot point, is getting to see Ogata wiggle under a fence like a cat.

So, I approve of this at least. My own cat scores this as an 8/10 in cat wiggling. Minus 2 points for not enough emotion from Ogata’s face.

Thankfully, Asirpa was able to escape with Sofia after Tsukishima gunned down Ariko. It seemed to me that Koito froze/hesitated during that situation. Tsukishima had no problem brutally shooting Ariko at point blank while Koito literally just hung back and watched.

Asirpa is in a state of extreme shock. She just interrogated by Tsurumi to give up the code, watched Ariko be shot and now sees Boutarou’s corpse in the bottle-mobile. Our girl needs years of therapy - she’s reaching the same level as our male cast members at this rate.

At least she breaks down in tears as Sugimoto tries to console her. The artwork for this part of the page is excellent, it really does capture the melting of her mind and how she’s realizing how deadly the gold is.

It ties directly back to her argument with Kikuta before all this shit went down. I’m always giving Sugimoto crap for being a moron, but it seems that he did make the right action by reaching out to allow her to hug his arm. There is that soft look as he gazes down at her and just lets her be emotional. It is clear that his presence is a comfort to her as she takes her time before returning to a more lucid mental state. This is shown by how she opens her eyes and looks up before declaring that they need to meet up with Hijikata since she’s figured out how to crack the code.

Meanwhile, Kikuta rushed Ariko to a clinic to save his life. Being the father figure/older brother he is, he tells him that it isn’t his time to die; he never made that makiri yet! And to my relief, Ariko wakes up! Noda didn’t go for the lazy writing of killing of the minor Ainu character, something I was afraid of.

If his father saved him, it means his makiri was where he was shot in the chest under his uniform. There is a lovely transition about a makiri in a fictional museum that was made by him, implying that he returned home and did make the makiri and likely resolved some of his identity issues, though it was still likely a tough life for him. Ariko apologies for not being able to work as a spy for Central and really it isn’t like he’d be able to do so anyways. But he did verbally point out he’s now politically on the side of someone like Asirpa to fight for their culture and right to exist in spite of colonial powers. The middle panel of Kikuta bidding him farewell just gives me the feels. It is so clear that Kikuta knows he’s toast. He saw Tsukishima shoot Ariko and Tsukishima likely watched him as he tried to save the man.

The fact that he said a casual line about going to an onsen. Ugh, death flag for sure right there. It seems Ariko knows that as he looks forlorn. Kikuta is that sort of suave man who is going to look cool even though he’s doomed; he’s that awesome.

The action returns to Tsurumi at the church having solved the code. With Tsukishima gone off to try to kill Ariko, Koito has remained behind. All of a sudden Koito reverts to his extreme Satsuma accent when addressing Tsurumi in the absence of Tsukishima. I think he didn’t even realize it at first, just like how after they escaped the fight with Boutarou, Koito spoke normally to Tsurumi without realizing it.

It is clear it took him a moment to realize he was speaking ‘Koito’ as Tsurumi is unable to respond to him and he then panics. Koito is more than willing to chase after Tsukishima and support him, but Tsurumi instead recalls him.

At first he consoles himself that everything is okay.

He is trying very hard to convince himself that everything that they witnessed through the keyhole was all an act to get the key! Yes, it isn’t that Tsurumi doesn’t have some sort of awesome goal and this isn’t about how the death of his wife and daughter left him unhinged!

But the other random members of the 27th then comment on how strongly Nikaido reeks of beer . . . and Koito then thinks about how he and Tsukishima were hiding in the room at the church when Tsurumi ‘checked’ that he was alone. And then it hits him - they were also played as a part of the ‘Tsurumi theatre’. Unlike Tsukishima who has whole-heartily given himself over to Tsurumi, it is clear that Koito can’t.

That monologue sounded too good to be true. He weakly says Tsukishima’s name into the rain as he then thinks ‘No . . .’ The rain is really fitting in this scene, I think it really is a stand in for Koito’s own disappointment and tears in this entire crazy quest for the gold. Is he worried about his ‘older’ brother figure? Himself? Both of them?

He continues to try to rationalize the performance that Tsurumi gave them - even if Tsurumi lied to them, it wasn’t all a lie. Oh Koito. I want to give you a hug and pull you away as your little bon-bon-ness has won me over. Most of that speech wasn’t for Koito, it was for Tsukishima. Speaking about helping Japan is what Koito would like to hear but we can tell he doubts that as well. Hence, his waffling.

But then he realizes that as Tsukishima has given so much - all of Tsurumi’s words, even if they were ‘sweet lies’ as he he referred to them on Karafuto, it was just perfect for Tsukishima. However, Koito has broken the spell that Tsurumi held over him. The final page of the chapter of Koito looking at the illuminated Tsurumi and shutting the door on him. It is the exact opposite of when Tsurumi rescued Koito from the kidnappers when in his youth. I now find myself wondering how this relates to the tiger curse. It is clear that the curse for Tsukishima will not end well. After he shot Ariko, his eyes regained their sparkle! Not good, not good at all! However, have I misinterpreted it for Koito that by becoming disillusioned with Tsurumi he will be cursed to be miserable through him gaining independence from his hero worship of Tsurumi? The idea that ignorance is bliss, and now Koito is well in the know. The fact that when he and Tsukishima were sort of on the same page was when he could speak to Tsurumi but now that he’s on a different path from Tsukishima he’s tripped up again.

Chapter 274 finally allows Asirpa to determine the fake skins after what she witnessed with Boutarou in the brewery and thinking about Ainu garments that she figured out that Edogai likely went above and beyond with his fakes. Thanks money counterfeiting guy from the fake Ainu village for the inspiration. It is a lot of pages that tie together other plot points nicely but really doesn’t do anything for me as a reader personally.

The most important point is that as Sugimoto falls asleep while Asirpa and Hijikata work with the skins is that we get another flashback - one that links him to Kikuta!

and even more importantly - Hanazawa Yuusaku! Chapter 275 starts out with an homage to the classic movie ‘Singing in the Rain’. As soon as I saw Sugimoto spinning on a lamp post, it was obvious. Yes, small town boy in the big city - causing trouble. He gets in some sort of brawl with random guys from the army and is ‘rescued’ by Kikuta, who immediately realizes that he’s hungry and decides to treat him to some lunch.

It shows that Sugimoto has a short fuse and is an impulsive youngster. Really, he is lucky that he didn’t do more stupid shit to get him in trouble. We can also clearly see that Kikuta is a member of the 1st Division, the Tokyo based one that Sugimoto eventually enlists with.

Kikuta decides that he wants Sugimoto to impersonate Hanazawa Yuusaku and to go on a marriage interview for him. This is because Hanazawa Hiro, the now identified wife of Hanazawa, is pulling the strings in the background to prevent Yuusaku from becoming a flag bearer.

This then makes us wonder why these two parents have such contrasting expectations for their only son. It makes me think back to my theory that Yuusaku was a pretty poor solider and lacked any skill or potential. Long ago, Tsurumi told Nikaido that Ogata is the ‘true heir’ of Hanazawa inheriting his military and [some] leadership skills as he stood on the watch tower in Barato ordering the random gangsters how to fight effectively. Yuusaku is a disappointment for Hanazawa - he can only save face by having his son become such a symbolic part of the army.

I laughed at the next page where Kikuta confirms that Hiro is colluding with the young heiress to steal Yuusaku’s virginity and thus preventing him from becoming a flag bearer. I love the posture of the terrified Yuusaku!

However, Hiro’s plan has been found out by Hanazawa and he consulted with the leader of the 1st Division to assist him with resolving this unpatriotic and embarrassing issue. Recall that Ogata was born as a result of Hanazawa being posted to Tokyo - this implies that he likely became good friends with the leader of the 1st Division during this time.

To prevent anyone from identifying Sugimoto, he’s the perfect substitute for Yuusaku and changes into Kikuta’s uniform. He’s one of those guys who just has that look. Sugimoto immediately thinks that since he’s been treated well by Kikuta, joining the military might be a good way to find security - in food. However, we get a link of the cap to Kikuta and what appears to be his dying younger brother.

Kikuta looks so sad, like there is something unfortunate with Sugimoto’s statement of food. We don’t get to see his expression, indicating he’s likely hiding his emotions from Sugimoto and instead tells Sugimoto he’s going to have to train him in food etiquette.

He’s presented with some Western cuisine, something that may blow his cover and something that Kikuta didn’t expect as he watches from a tree outside. But again, due to his extreme luck, he’s able to use nervousness as an excuse and it gives him time to state his family his super traditional so they wouldn’t have eaten food like this. When he’s removed the cap, Kaneko Kaeko is smitten with his handsome face. He can use his excuse as a way to have an out for not knowing how to eat that tasty ebi fry (why to I hear ‘ebi fry’ in Nyanko-sensei’s voice?).

As she explains the fancy places she’s dined at, Sugimoto thinks about how he was living off of cat food. Cue another reason why he just hates on Ogata, since he was stealing food from Ogata’s people!

The rest of the dinner goes well, and Kikuta checks in with him. Meanwhile, our wealthy heiress is completely smitten with him!

As Sugimoto mulls over the idea of a somewhat arranged marriage as a negative he spills the beans about Toraji and Umeko. And Kikuta isn’t having any of his bullshit. I love how Kikuta points out how selfish and downright stupid Sugimoto is being in all of this. Kikuta gives Sugimoto good advice - which he’s clearly still never followed.

He makes it clear that he’s got to give up on that hometown and move on. Which will be completely ignored as Toraji will end up in the 1st Division with Sugimoto in the trenches. I’m now wondering how Toraji and Sugimoto reconnected. Hrrrmmmmm? Is this something that Sugimoto encouraged and that’s why he has all of these unresolved emotions about Toraji’s death in the war?

The chapter reveals to us that Tsukishima’s love ended up marrying the cousin of Kaeko, making Tsukishima’s acceptance of her ‘death’ even more heartbreaking as he thought that Tsurumi had lied to him about her fate. [weeps bitterly].

As Kikuta and Sugimoto discuss what appears to be Yuusaku’s lack of a free will, he’s told not to meddle in others concerns. What does Sugimoto do? The man just can’t keep to himself and he goes and finds Yuusaku to confront him. He wants to know if Yuusaku wants to be a flag bearer even though it is a death sentence. How does that conversation go? Just how we’d expect with all of the information we know about Yuusaku.

I love how he’s like it isn’t to meet my father’s expectations! It is because understand my father’s convictions and fight for my country. Okay, you keep telling yourself that Yuusaku, but it still sounds like you are doing this for your father, you know tomay-to, tomah-to. Sugimoto mulls over what Yuusaku would choose if given the choice. I just sigh as we know enough about Yuusaku’s backstory that the man only does what his father says - with great conviction. All of our Ogata flashbacks have made this so clear, Yuusaku is a doomed man from the moment he entered the army. Maybe even a doomed man from his birth even. Perhaps, he’s acutely aware of this, but based on how freakkin’ awkward he’s with Ogata and his older brother actions, I continue to think he’s not the brightest bulb in the pack and can only be used as a patriotic pawn.

Yuusaku then becomes suspicious of Sugimoto’s line of inquiry and realizes that he’s got Kikuta’s cap.

Not sure how to respond, he runs away and we learn that Kikuta’s younger brother died of illness during the first Sino-Japanese war. That same war that killed Koito’s older brother and that Tsurumi and Tsukishima fought in as well. With the statement of illness, I know what most likely killed Kikuta’s younger brother - malnutrition - specifically beri beri. As the Japanese military rapidly modernized using European models, they ran into an issue with many soldiers and sailors dying of some sort of mysterious illness and it wasn’t something that impacted the Westerners at all. Most of this has to do with the ability to eat white rice which was much more processed. It made it more expensive, but was nutritionally bad for men who came from lower incomes or poverty. Remember how stoked Asirpa was when she ate white rice all the way back at the herring fishery? If anyone has read “House of Five Leaves” by Natsume Ono, you’d know the protagonist is a poor ronin and he falls ill due to beri beri. The solution was to return to the countryside/hometown to eat a more diverse diet. For a more detailed explanation of how bad this was for the Japanese military check out the video by Linfamy on youtube here.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IzIBpFDRr5g

The video even highlights the fierce (and counterproductive) competition between the Army and Navy which has already been well defined through Koito’s backstory. The chapter ends with Sugimoto dropping the cap and the polite man who picks it up for him is Tsurumi with Ogata, Usami and Tsukishima in Tokyo. The plot thickens . . . somehow Sugimoto got mixed up in the business of the 27th and apparently Tokyo isn’t a vast city that you can get lost in and everyone knows everyone. Like how I was on flight to Saskatoon and the man next to me started up a conversation how he was from Burlington and went to Guelph and my friend who I was going to visit was also from Burlington and went to Guelph it is a small world kinda moment and in agriculture. I digress though. Things are starting to pull back together but I’m still not 100% on with this plot direction/story arc.

#golden kamuy #golden kamuy meta #sugimoto saichi #ogata hyakunosuke #asirpa #ariko rikimatsu #ipopote #warrant officer kikuta #tsukishima hajime #koito otonoshin #hanazawayuusaku #hanazawakoujiro #hanazawa hiro #kaneko kaeko #Usami Tokishige

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kikis-writing-world · 3 years

Text

Bug in the System

Summary: Reader has a complicated relationship with Nathan, living and working with him. They’ve always been nervous to bring up prescription medication, so shit hits the fan when they runs out and their mood plummets.

Pairing: Nathan Bateman x GN!Reader that struggles with mental health.

Word Count: 2k

Rating/Warnings: Mental health - depression and anxiety are expressly mentioned and reader is in a bad low. Talk of medication and ramifications of not taking them. Mention of doctors. Brief mention of sex. Worries of the stigma around mental health. Lots of swearing because it’s Nathan. Unedited/Betaed. it’s almost fluff in Nathan’s asshole way, there’s a happy ending.

A/N: I blame @foxilayde that I’m suddenly writing for Nathan... I hated him when I watched the movie and now here we are. Idk, this idea hit me last night while trying to fall asleep and I couldn’t get it out of my head. I had to write it.

You weren’t sure how to define the relationship you and Nathan had. He wasn’t your boyfriend - not only did that feel so juvenile, but also… he just wasn’t. There had never been a declaration of love between the two of you, no commitment to monogamy or even non-monogamy. The two of you lived together, worked together, slept together- it could almost be called a friends with benefits relationship, only… softer. You ate dinners together, danced around the house together, and cuddled together when watching movies. You also spent days, sometimes weeks at a time where you hardly spoke to each other when engrossed in a project. Did this form out of attraction, or emotion, or was it an inevitability when two adults - whose sexualities, attractions and availabilities lined up accordingly - lived together in isolation for an extended period of time?

In summary: there was no easy way to define what was between the two of you, and you were happy there were no other humans around to ask. You didn’t feel the need to defend what you shared, but you had no desire to try to label it either.

Despite the friendly and casual nature of whatever the relationship was, there were still things that you had yet to admit to Nathan. The dwindling supply of medications tucked safely in a make-up bag inside the drawer of your bedside table felt like a ticking time bomb. You only had so many doses remaining and it wasn’t like you could walk down to the local pharmacy for a refill. Any supplies coming to the fortress of a home had to be called in, ordered, and helicoptered to you. There was no way to do it without Nathan finding out along the way.

You watched the pills slowly empty from their plastic bottles like a reverse hourglass. Despite the effects they had on your malfunctioning brain chemistry, they never quite tampered down the anxiety you had about opening up about your mental illness, let alone to someone like Nathan.

Nathan worked hard and played harder. He strove to be the best him he could be at all times. He accepted nothing less than perfection and no matter what the relationship between you two could be defined as -coworkers, employer/employee, friends, friends with benefits, lovers - you didn’t want to disappoint him.

You avoided and avoided until inevitably, the last pill came out of the last bottle. It only got worse from there. Without the anxieties in check and the chemicals being balanced, the insecurity flared even worse. Your inner voice told you that you deserved the unhappiness flowing through you, that you should just stay in bed and give up since Nathan would kick you out of the house soon enough: he’d either get tired of your low mood, your falling productivity, or he’d discover your secret and be done with you.

He noticed. Of course he did. You stopped dancing, stopped cuddling, stopped fucking. Then you stopped eating, stopped talking, stopped leaving your room. You felt like you couldn’t get out of bed at all. You spent your time sleeping or curled up under your blankets in the dark room wishing you could sleep more. That or just disappear.

That was where Nathan found you, a month and a half after you’d run out of your meds.

“What the fuck is going on with you?” He barged into your room one morning… afternoon… you had no idea what time it was.

Nathan turned the light on and you could hear him pacing. “Are you sick? Do I need to call in a doctor? Are you even alive under there?! Hello?!”

You sighed, forcing yourself to sit up and prove you were alive, awake, and hearing him. The blankets dropped to your waist, revealing what you were sure was an absolute mess of a human. You knew what you looked like the last time you’d been brave enough to look in the mirror and you were sure it was even worse now.

Nathan cursed and you swear he nearly recoiled at the sight of you. “Are you in here dying on me or something?” He questioned.

You weren’t sure how to answer, what you could possibly say to him.

“Hello?!” He snapped his fingers in front of your face. “Is anybody in there?!”

You blinked as he crowded you, hysterics growing as you seemingly ignored him. You could tell he was close to grabbing you and shaking you, and you didn’t know if your body could handle that. As it was, your muscles had protested sitting up. Instead, you leaned over and opened your drawer, taking out the zippered make-up bag.

You tossed the pouch at him, hearing all the plastic bottles click together as it landed at his feet. He bent down to pick it up, opening it carefully like he thought some sort of creature might jump out at him. His brows furrowed when he saw the bottles inside and dumped them out onto the mattress.

“Are these all empty? Fuck did you take these?” He questioned, panic rising in his voice. “Are you trying to OD on me or something? Shit.” He pulled his phone out of his pocket, about to call for help.

“No.” You croaked. “Well, yeah. I took them… but… they’re my meds.” You gave in. “I’ve been taking them since I got here. I[was taking until they ran out.”

Nathan looked down at the bottles, picking one up as he read the label. “What are they for?”

“Depression mostly. Anxiety.” You shrugged, listing the simple ones.

Nathan was quiet as he read the bottles. You had no idea if he knew what any of them meant. It’s not like the labels read “Take one daily to stop the crazies!” The names, the dosages, the frequencies meant nothing to someone with no experience… but then again, Nathan wasn’t just anyone.

“How long?” He sighed, turning to sit on the edge of the bed.

You would have deflated if you didn’t already feel as low as you could go. Having assumed the worst, you weren’t surprised he couldn’t look at you.

“I was diagnosed in junior year-”

“No, I mean how long have you been without your meds?” He interrupted you, turning to stare you down.

“A month.” You shrugged. “Almost two.”

“For fucks sakes.” He grumbled, turning to his phone again and typing away.

“I’ll pack my shit. Just, give me a few days and I’ll go.” You mumbled, laying down on your side and facing away from him. You didn’t want to watch him posting for a new assistant or scheduling the pick-up or whatever he was doing. You’d wallow for a bit, probably take a nap, and then you’d pack anything here that was important. Fuck the rest. You didn’t have the energy. You didn’t care.

“The fuck are you talking about?” He asked distractedly, like he hadn’t heard you as his cogs of his brain jumped to life. He did that a lot when he was preoccupied. He would hear your voice, realize you’re talking, but not absorb the words. Sometimes he needed to ask 3 or 4 times until you gave up and texted him instead.

“I’m bringing in a doctor. You need to get checked out before you start back up on anything. You’re not supposed to go off of these without supervision. Says so right here. Black and white.” He chastised you.

You frowned, looking over your shoulder in confusion. You saw him still typing away on his phone, holding one of the empty, orange-tinted bottles in his hand. He set it down, picking up another. He took a picture, looking over the label quickly for himself before setting it back down.

“What are you doing?”

“Sending him the labels so he knows what he’s walking into. Why the fuck would you just stop taking your meds?” He sniped. “Why didn’t you get more? I fucking ask you if you need shit and you just conveniently forget your pills?”

You picked at a thread of the blanket, not wanting to watch him as he grew angrier with you. As soon as you were in good health and his conscience was clear, he’d be rid of you. You were sure of it. It was more than you’d expected to be honest.

You heard the quiet noise from his phone, indicating the email had been sent. That meant his attention wasn’t divided as he rounded back on you.

“Why won’t you answer me? It’s like fucking talking to a wall or something. If I wanted one-sided conversations, I never would have brought you up here. Why didn’t you get more?!”

You took a shuddering breath before answering. “I didn’t want you to know.”

“Know what? That you take medication?” He scoffed in disbelief.

The room was quiet as you didn’t answer, but you could practically hear his brain processing, whirring like a computer with a squeaky exhaust fan.

“Hey, look at me.” He ordered, his voice dropping in volume to a kinder tone, but it was still not a request. It was a demand. You sat up again, looking at him stare at you with dark, angry eyes.

“When a program isn’t working, do you throw away the whole CPU or do you debug it and fucking find the fix?” He asked. You didn’t answer, assuming it was rhetorical.

“Your software is fucked, and these,” he picked up one of the bottles to hold up between you two. “These are the fix. Why the fuck would you be embarassed about shit like that?”

You shrugged your shoulders, dropping your gaze again. “You’re…” you struggled to find the words, but Nathan jumped on your train of thought frighteningly quick.

“Me?! So it’s my fault? I eat brown rice and salad and work out every day so I’m some health nut hippy who wouldn’t understand, is that it?”

He was putting words into your mouth, but he was essentially getting the point. You were scared he would reject you, mock you, think less of you.

He crawled towards you on the bed, cupping your chin a little too tight as he lifted your face. He was clearly done having you look away from him. “I’m a fucking reclusive genius who lives in the middle of ass fuck nature and only lets people come and go with a goddamn keycard! Do you not think I’m self-aware enough to realize that? A fucking prodigy, multi-millionaire by 15, CEO of the most successful technology company in history. The President calls me and I hit ignore. Do you really think I’m not self-aware enough to know we all have our own brand of fucked up?” He laughed.

“If you need these to get through it, to be my little genius-” He released your jaw to cup your face in both hands, giving it a shake. “To keep up with my shit, to live here without losing your mind at the isolation, to be my dance partner and dinner partner and movie date - then fucking take them. Would I be having to tell you this if it was for your blood pressure or a heart condition or something?!”

His phone buzzed and he released his hold on you, leaning back to read the message that had just come through.

“Doc’s gonna be here tomorrow morning. Gotta keep you hydrated until then and you should try to eat.” He summed up the message as his eyes skimmed the screen. He tucked his phone back into his pocket before slapping your blanket-covered thigh. “What are we eating tonight? Your choice.”

“I’m not hungry.” You mumbled.

“Not an option!” He declined as he stood off the bed. “What are we eating?”

You sighed, letting your head fall back as you thought. “Grilled cheese?”

“And tomato soup? Coming right up.” He leaned over to you, cupping the back of your head as he pulled you close enough to kiss the top of your head. “Rest. I’ll bring it in when it’s ready.”

Tagging: @wickedfrsgrl @din-damn-djarin @dinthisisthe-wayson @seasonschange-butpeopledont @kesskirata

#Nathan Bateman x Reader #Nathan Bateman x GN!Reader #Nathan Bateman x You #Nathan Bateman imagine #Nathan Bateman drabble #Oscar Isaac Character Fanfiction #Wookietales #Nathan Bateman

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