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infinitegalahad · 3 years

Note

YOUR PROMPTS ARE OPEN!!!! 🥳🥳🥳 im so excited this time has come! you know i'll probably send a few but for my first i'd like to request #'s 33 and 50 from the fluff prompts with my dear shifty, of course. mucho love 2 u!

A LITTLE PIECE OF HOME

Summary: Before your childhood friends Popeye and Shifty are shipped out, Popeye brings his new camera and decides to make some last minute memories.

Word-Count: 1.9k

Prompts: “can i keep it, the photo of us?” and “look at me.”

A/N: pearl, my love, my life-HI! your little request was beyond fun to write! this piece is short and sweet in (hopefully) all the right places-anything for you! shifty is our sweet sunshine boy and it was a pleasure to write for you. i hope you request more prompts soon my love-thanks you for being there for me. your messages always brighten my day. i hope you enjoy ❣️✨

Masterlist | Send In A Prompt!

It was the perfect day outside. In Virginia, it felt like summer all year round. But today was different-it was absolutely gorgeous. The sun shined bright as the heat burned down on your exposed shoulders with the sun making your skin become pink. The day seemed too perfect for it to end so soon.

You, Darrell, and Robert had been friends since the three of you were in diapers. You all grew up in a small tight-knit town; living down the same dirt road that went for miles on end, going to the same Sunday church and packed diner for pancakes and milkshakes, walked all over the train tracks, the three of you were conjoined at the hip. Wherever they went, you went with them.

Robert was the one who brought the group together. In second grade, Robert and Darrell had been playing during recess one day and saw you, sitting all by yourself with tears coming out of your big eyes and your hair and dress all covered in dirt. Darrell saw you and ran over. He didn’t know you, but he hated seeing other people sad-so not only were you crying, but Darrell burst into loud sobs, followed by Robert. When you had stopped crying, Darrell and Robert took you to their little play corner and got wet clothes, rubbing the dirt from your face. The boys in your school had been teasing you and kicked dirt in your direction, messing up the outfit your mama had made for you. While Darrell attempted to “make you pretty” again, he asked for your name and asked if you had any friends. Once you told him your name and that you had no friends, he said that he and Robert were your new friends from now on.

And they truly were.

Now the three of you we’re in your twenties-still living in that small town in Virginia. Each of you had changed in appearance. Popeye grew into his round-face, his thin hair receding, but his dimples and slurred accent still remaining the same. Shifty, well to you-he was handsome. He hadn’t changed one bit, but every day he got even more handsome to look at it. He grew from the sweetheart who cried with you in second grade to the boy who offered to take you platonically to prom since nobody was “in their right mind” to do so. The boy with the sun-tanned skin and comforting smile was your best friend and the love of your life. But how could you tell him? Almost every girl wanted him. Bless their hearts, but he was too shy for his own good-and so were you. Considering your experience with men, you decided it was best if you and Shifty would stay friends. The two of you had done some for nearly a decade. But as you got older, it got harder to contain those feelings. Whenever you looked at him, you felt like you were going to throw up your heart.

The three of you all believed that you would live in this town for the rest of your lives and until you were all old and real adults. But that all changed in an instant.

Robert and Shifty had signed up for the Paratroopers and we’re being shipped out to Toccoa early next morning. They had broken the news to you last night at Shifty’s house with his poor Ma, breaking into tears. Just like his ma, Shifty’s big eyes began to burst into tears, which made everybody cry. Whenever he got emotional, it always reminded you of a younger and more innocent Shifty, the one that never missed a single shot and loved nature. Your one, true friend who you could tell anything to, the one who knew your small quirks and deepest secrets. The one man that you loved more than anything in the world that was now slipping through your fingers.

In that very field you sat in, you stayed silent most of the time. Shifty had his rifles slung over his shoulders, donning light blue overalls as he and Popeye walked around, casually conversing about being Paratroopers. You hide behind the tall grass, slowly picking the petals off of a bright daisy, muttering to yourself. You watched his every move; his lips moving with a smile, his smooth skin glittering in the sun, and his chocolate brown hair becoming golden in the bright sun.

You had become so lost in your own little world that you didn’t even notice Shifty, standing right next to you. He poked your shoulder and saw you looked up with a confused face, progressing your surroundings.

“Y/n? You okay?” He asked, bending down with his hands on his knees. “You’ve been awfully quiet.”

You looked up and subtle smiled to cover up your sadness. “I am, Darrell. Just a little sleepy.”

Darrell held out a free hand in front of your face, “Well, you wanna with me just a little?

You silently responded and took his hand, which lingered for longer than you wanted it to. His hands had been so worked, his skin remained as soft as silk. His fingertips finessed against your palm. The two of you walked side by side as you walked side by side, the sounds of the wind blowing through the tall grass filling the silent void.

Darrell was a little concerned by your quiet behavior. You were normally very energetic about him and Robert, but you were as silent as a mouse today. It was your last time truly with him and for Robert for one month, one year, who knew how long they would be gone for. Darrell maybe would never see you again, the small town the two of you grew up in, your bright smile. He wanted to see that every single day; whether that be waking up to you in the morning or having a little piece of you overseas.

Darrell was very in touch with his emotions, unafraid to conceal them. His ma always taught him to be honest, and that’s what he did best. So when you were down, he had to fix it before it was too late.

“Y/n?” He said in a low tone, turning over to see you, unresponsive as you looked down at your fiddling hands. You were hurting, and it broke his heart to see what. “Can you tell me what’s bothering you?”

You were unresponsive as you kept your eyes down, your hands scrunching with the fabric of your flowy skirt. He had done nothing wrong-he never had done anything wrong to you ever. But it was hard to think that the next time you would hear from Shifty-it could be a military letter and announce that he had died a hero. Just another number in a never-ending war. And that you, a fool, never confessed how you felt to your childhood best friend.

Darrell stopped in his tracks and let out a soft sigh, tenderly grabbing your forehand to stop you as well. His free hand moved to the edge of your chin, gently tilting it sideways so you would make eye contact with him.

“Look at me,” Darrell politely requested, his voice shaky.

You followed his request and looked at him, seeing that he was fighting back tears. You weren’t the only one, which made you feel relieved and even sadder.

“Oh Darrell...you know if I start with my waterworks, you’ll be followed’ after,'' You remarked and let out a dry chuckle, masking the incoming tears. It was too late and a stray tear escaped from Shifty’s eye, his pink lips quivering as he was speechless.

Just like you had stated, two tears came from your eyes as you used a finger to wipe him away. “Told ya’ so. Look at us, just little kids.”

Darrell rested in your palm, rubbing against it like a cat would with a pillow. “Like it was yesterday. I remember washing the dirt from your cheeks so I could make you look pretty again. Don’t know why I ever said that-you still are pretty.”

You patted his cheeks as you lead his hands down into your own, squeezing them. Darrell and you stood in the open field, hands tangled with each other, the wind blowing against you as the grass tickled your bare feet. Not only did the humidity make you feel warm, but so did the growing heat in your cheeks.

“How do you tell someone you love them?” Darrell casually questioned to break the silence that was growing in the wind.

A smile crept on your face, “Just like your ma would say, you just gotta be honest with yourself.”

“Well, I think I love you. No, I don’t think. I know it.” Darell declared, holding your hands close to his chest. “I wanted to let you know. I didn’t wanna ever tell you.”

You tilted your heart and let out a dreamy sigh. “Oh, Darell...I…”

The sudden click and flash of a camera before blinded you and Shifty. You squint your eyes as they burned with flashes of white light as Shifty pulled you into his chest, his hands protectively resting on your lower back.

It was just Robert, holding his brand new camera over his eyes, his thin eyebrows raised and mouth wide open in shock. Instead of reacting, Shifty and you stayed close together, both red in the face along with Robert.

Robert took the photo out of the camera and shook it, tucking it into Shifty’s pocket. You opened your mouth to speak, but Robert beat you to it.

“I’ll leave you lovebirds to it,” Robert said as he turned around, walking away in a hurry, “I’ll see ya at the Power’s for supper-I hope.”

Once Robert had left, Shifty dug his fingers into his pocket to retrieve the photo. You leaned against his chest and observed the photo. Robert had caught the two of you in the middle of your confession, hands tangled as your eyes met. Both of you had smiles on your faces-and Darrell looked amazing-even if he was in black and white.

“That’s not a bad photo of you,” You complimented as you leaned into his nice smelling chest, “You looked handsome.”

“And you looked pretty-but you always do.” Shifty shot back, planting a kiss into your face. He observed the photo and then looked down at you to compare, a big smile appearing on his face like a child on Christmas morning. Shifty had found his answer, and it was not only right in front of him but in his fingertips.

“Can I keep it, this photo of us?” Darrell said in your hair as he shook the photo, “When I need a piece of home. I’ll give you my whole heart, anything you want, darlin’.”

You nodded your head, “Yes, you can. You don’t need to give me anything-but can I ask you something?”

“Yes, darlin’. Anything,” Darrell stated as he looked down at your adoringly. He looked like he wanted to give you the whole world in that moment, If he could have, he would have.

“We only got a night left together for a long time. Can we spend it all together? Just one night?”

Shifty flashed his bright smile and kissed each knuckle on your hand, leaving a small mark. “Yes ma’am.”

Once Shifty had neatly stored the cherished photograph of you into his breast project, the two of you grabbed each other's hands and walked down the gravel road, back to the Power’s residence for supper. You leaned against his shoulder, letting him lead you. Whenever Darrell had gone, you would follow along. You knew your last few hours together were short, but if it was your last time ever seeing Darell-you wanted to make the most of it.

#carrie writes #shifty powers #shifty powers x reader #band of brothers #band of brothers x reader #shifty powers imagine #band of brothers imagine

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jadedjxsung · 4 years

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hahha me again! could i please request a jisung friends or frenemies to lovers au, maybe some drunk talk is involved, also im a sucker for misunderstandings or jealousy so theres some angst in the middle of the story but ultimately ends fluffy and good. thank you! hope u have a great day :)

my first request fsjafkfjj thank you! i hope you enjoy it, and are having a pleasant day yourself :)

han jisung x reader | friends to lovers au | hurt/comfort, fluff + angst (i am a sucker for hurt/comfort and friends to lovers sdkfdj) | 1.2k words | tw: drinking/alcohol, jealousy, also swearing maybe

you casually sprawled on the couch of your apartment, waiting for your guests to arrive. checking the time on your phone, it was 6pm - they were due to turn up at any minute.

as if on cue, the door swung open quite suddenly - causing you to flinch slightly. in came your best friend jisung, followed by felix, seungmin, changbin, jeongin, hyunjin, minho and chan. the three eldest carried bags - bringing in the pleasant smell of takeout. one of them had glass bottles that clinked as they put the bags on your kitchen bench.

“are we ready to party?!” jisung climbed over the back of your couch to sit where your feet had been moments ago. this was something he’d started doing some time ago, and he’d landed on you more than once - it had become a reflex to move your feet.

“let’s eat first, that food can’t go cold.” you gently nudged him with your foot before you stood up, everyone soon filling up plates with the various different dishes the lads had brought with them.

as the night progressed, your living room became a mess of beer and soju bottles, blankets and jackets strewn about. everyone was at least tipsy, if not quite drunk already. you felt the buzz in your skull, and everyone’s coordination was definitely off; which was likely why felix suggested that you crack out your old wii and play some wii sports, which resulted in the scene in front of you.

hyunjin and jisung were versing each other in bowling, and it was getting quite competitive. your face hurt from how much you’d been laughing - you’d hardly been able to breathe for the past few minutes, and it didn’t help you were sandwiched between the arm of your couch and minho.

“are they always this competitive when they’re drunk?”

“yeah. it’s a wonder they haven’t tried to kill each other yet.” he chuckled, taking a sip of... something in a green bottle. you couldn’t quite read the label. hyunjin screeched suddenly and started doing his victory dance wii remote nearly hitting him in the head once or twice. jisung was pouting, and sat down on the cushion by your feet, leaning against your legs.

“aww jisungie, you big baby.” you ruffled his hair affectionately as you got up, going to the bathroom. when you returned after a couple of minutes, they’d decided to play a horror game instead. you returned to the couch, where jisung, minho, and felix were sitting. minho and jisung moved over so that there would be enough room for you to squish yourself between them. as felix played the game, everyone was silent, screeching when there were jumpscares. you naturally brought your knees to your chest, so that your left side was now leaning against the back of the couch and you were facing minho, your back to jisung. you felt jisung bury his face into your back, and there was something comforting in that.

closing your eyes for a while, you started thinking about your friendship with him. you’d always had a bit of a crush on him, and while you didn’t like to admit it, you’d never get tired of his company. even if he was a little shit sometimes. silently, you decided that you would take those feelings, shove them into a box and kick it under your bed. your friendship was valuable to you, and you didn’t want to risk losing it all because of some human emotions that you could suppress. you’d get over it eventually, right?

... right?

you opened your eyes again, lifting your head - you’d been resting your head on minho’s shoulder, who was fast asleep. the first thing you noticed was your back felt cold. no jisung. peering in the dark, you didn’t see him with the others, who were playing some combination of poker and uno that they’d tried to teach you once. it was horribly confusing.

“i think he went that way, y/n.” chan tilted his head towards your barely-even-a-hallway hallway, that lead to the bathroom and your bedroom. “he’s definitely at the ‘sad drunk jisung’ stage.” you nodded, making your way towards your room. you could see the light of your rgb led strips slowly change colour as you knocked gently and opened the door.

silently, you sat on your bed, cross legged by his body. his back was facing you now.

“you okay?”

sniffle. “no.”

“why?” thick silence. “tell me, baby.” silence, with the exception of a few sniffles here and there. he said something quietly, but you didn’t quite pick up on it. “what?”

“you seem close with minho-hyung.” he spoke louder.

“well, i guess so. we’re friends.”

“i-is it more than that?”

“where’d you get that idea, hmm?” he turned around, so he was facing you.

“you were very close to him, practically sitting on his lap.” another sniffle. the way the blue light hit his features made him look much sadder - his eyes, which were glassy, reflected the light, and you could see the tear trails down his cheeks.

“it sounds like you’re jealous, sungie.” you gently teased.

he sighed. “yeah, i am. i want you to be cuddling me, to be close to me. i’ve liked you for so long and i’ve tried to hide it because our friendship means so much to me and i know you don’t like me back.” he started crying again.

you moved backwards, so you were leaning against the wall, a pillow behind your back, and opened your arms. jisung half-crawled onto your lap, so he was straddling you, crying into the crook of your neck. you wrapped your arms around his waist.

“so much for kicking boxes under beds.” you muttered to yourself. “i like you too, you idiot. i didn’t think you liked me back.”

he moved away to look at you, eyes wide in disbelief. “really?”

“yeah. i value our friendship and didn’t want to ruin it just because i had romantic feelings for you.” he buried his face in the crook of your neck again. you gently tilted your head, kissing him on the cheek. you felt his soft lips press a kiss to your collarbone. he kissed you gently, from your collarbone, up your neck, on your jaw, and stopped after he kissed the corner of your mouth.

“what?”

“can i kiss you?” you couldn’t help but chuckle.

“you’re cute. of cour-” he cut you off, pressing his lips to yours, your eyes shutting automatically. at first, he was desperate, and then began to relax as you tilted your head to deepen the kiss further, bringing your hands up to tangle in his hair. his lips were as soft as they looked, and he tasted like a mixture of soju and the takeout you’d eaten some time ago. you pulled away, so you could breathe, resting your hands against the back of his neck. how pretty he was, you thought, with his slightly swollen pouty lips, flushed cheeks and messy hair.

“i’ve been wanting to do that for a while.”

“mmm...” you hummed. “how about you move over a little bit so i can lie down?”

his lips, still slightly swollen, turned into a small grin. “only if you kiss me.”

i literally just remembered the read more thing exists oh my god- anyway, thanks for the request! feel free to request again!!

#stray kids imagines #han jisung imagines #jisung imagines #stray kids han #han jisung #stray kids angst.#stray kids fluff #han jisung fluff #han jisung angst #han jisung hurt/comfort #skz han #skz han jisung

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professionalsimpfor2dboys · 4 years

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Hi! Welcome to tumblr and the fandom!! If it's okay to request, can I get the brothers reaction to an MC who loses their memories? I just need that angst huehuehue

hii! & thank you for the warm welcome! I’m not the best at angst but I’ll try my best! thank u for requesting 🍓

Lucifer

he’s insanely stressed out by it

it honestly hurts his pride that you’ve forgotten about him & your memories together

will likely give you the cold shoulder for a bit because he refuses to believe that you’ve lost your memories but will definitely have one of his brothers report back to him about every little thing you do or any slight progress

will talk to Diavolo & Barbatos if there’s any way to get your memories back

while he’s trying to find a solution, he’ll bury himself in more work than ever & will slowly become more undone because every little thing reminds him of you

while he works he’ll be reminded of your massages, hair rubs, & cooing voice telling him to rest that he knows you don’t remember anymore

is noticeably less put-together than he used to be

he snaps more often since he’s more on edge & hates when you look at him with fear in your eyes that you hadn’t before when he loses his patience

is really just torn over the whole thing & would probably be the brother who is least likely to try & make new memories with you but rather try getting the old ones back

Mammon

aw this boy is absolutely heartbroken

“T-there’s no way you forgot about me, MC! I-I’m your first! ...please don’t leave me alone,”

feels as if it’s somehow his fault he didn’t prevent what happened, so inside he’s honestly eating at himself with guilt

spends all day with you like he used to in order to make new memories & try getting your old ones back

but can’t help but let the tears escape when he’s alone so he decides to always be with you

even clingier than he used to be because he’s afraid of something happening to you that’s even worse than losing your memory

“scooch over, will ya? I just wanna hold ya tonight, alright? just for tonight...” he says that every night until you just tell him to stop & just crawl in when he wants

that makes him tear up because it reminds him how close you two used to be

“I’ll get ya memories back, MC! Just watch! And then we can just look back at all these new memories too & laugh!”

probably will be the brother who spends time with you the most & you’ll probably feel the closest to him just like before

won’t hesitate to buy anything you want

why would ya do this to him 😭

Leviathan

doesn’t think it’s serious at first because of all the memory loss animes he’s watched before

when you first met he was very introverted & you eventually got him to open up as you got closer so he still acts like you two are close despite you not remembering it

realizes that you really don’t remember slowly getting him to open up when you say: “wow, everyone says how shut-in & introverted you are but I personally think you’re pretty outgoing!”

shuts himself in his room for a while after that

is surprised when you go to check on him & it doesn’t take him long to forget about everything when he starts rambling on about TSL

literally freezes & starts to cry when you ask: “wait, wait, wait, slow down. who’s Henry?”

you have to awkwardly hold him as he sobs

poor baby finally gets hit with all the sorrow at once after neglecting it for so long

“It’s not fair! why did you have to forget me, MC? was a worthless otaku like me not worth remembering?”

slightly avoids you while he’s too busy trying to find spells to reverse what happened to you

with slightly loathe himself for not hanging out with you more & fears that you really won’t remember him because most of your time together was him playing games in his room while you watched

“It’s unfair that you don’t remember while I do. every little thing hurts, MC.”

has wished he never met you so he doesn’t have to feel like this

Satan

won’t really react outwardly but inside he’s boiling

of course, he already has to deal with being an extension of Lucifer & now the one person who calmed him down doesn’t remember anything about him. why do the celestial realms hate him this much?

will be scarily calm when he first heard about it, quietly excuses himself to his room & promptly releases all his anger

lots of yelling and smashes will be heard from there

his room is a mess afterward and he doesn’t care enough to fix it

will eventually collapse from exhaustion of his outburst & the tears will leak out the sides of his eyes

why did it have to be you?

the day after he’ll lock eyes with you and hates it when flinch when you remember his yells of anger and anguish from the night before

stays up nights on end, reading books upon books on how to get memories back

let’s his level-headed persona go & shuts himself in because he knows he’s more prone to snapping now than ever

will probably be the brother that accepts that you lost your memory first

Asmodeus

oh he hates it, even if he tries to not let it show, inside he’s crushed

tries to brush it off & resumes his flirty antics almost right away

hates it that instead of you realizing it’s mostly a joke & laughing/flirting back like you used to, you back away

he was insanely attached to you before because he loved you not only lusted after you & it really breaks him that you just see him as the avatar of lust now

he endulges more in his sin than he had ever before but feels guilty afterward, as if he’s wronging you

if you lock eyes when he’s back from one of his “appointments” his eyes will begin to water & he’ll try to escape to his room

if you try to comfort him, he’ll sob into your neck while trying to sputter out words you don’t understand

“don’t leave me, MC. I only love you, why don’t you remember it?”

Beelzebub

poor baby is devastated

will likely eat even more than he used to in order to distract himself

likely will be the brother who forgets for a split second the most by reminiscing old memories before sadly realize you truly don’t remember

“MC~ why aren’t you up yet? It’s time for our daily morning workout!”

realizes you don’t remember when you pick up your head after waking up from your slumber with an honest confused look on your face

“O-oh, I’m sorry. I forgot. I won’t bother you again,” quietly while slowly shutting the door

will try to remake old memories in order to try to get you to remember but feels even sadder because it feels almost fake

“Lilith left, Belphie left, you can’t leave me too,”

Will likely be the most gentle about your memories & treat you even more fragile than he did before

Belphegor

this boy is torn because while he’s slightly glad you don’t remember what he did, he also feels insanely guilty about it too

should he tell you? how is he supposed to tell you he killed you?

“Oh, hey, I know you don’t remember but I literally squeezed you to death & the only reason you’re here is because you went back in time!” No way was he going to say that! it already took a while to get you to trust him again but he still felt like he didn’t deserve it back then so why does he deserve it now?

ignores you despite him missing you and your cuddles

will be the brother who most likely will give up on getting your memories back because he doesn’t feel like he deserves anything from you

sad boi 🥺

I hope i fulfilled your request how you would have liked it! I’m sorry it’s not that angsty, I suck at that haha 🍓

#obey me #demon brothers #obey me shall we date #obey me fandom #obey me x mc #obey me mc #otome game #obey me headcanons #obey me au #obey me requests #obey me angst #obey me memory loss

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anchoredtether · 3 years

Text

2020 Writing Roundup

Stolen from Rue! This was fun to reflect on!

Everyone is welcome to use this same format if they’d like to do the same!

~~~~~~~

S T A T S

Words written:

A whooping 232,867 - which is more than half of all the words I’ve written on Ao3 in the past seven years LOL. I guess I wrote to keep myself sane this crazy year.

O N G O I N G: S T A R T E D / U P D A T E D

AN UNORTHODOX APPROACH (21,586 words)

First new fic of the year, this is my Shrek AU! I really adore this fantasy AU and it’s fun to explore such a crack concept and treat it seriously. It’s also a Pikelavar AU of sorts.

DEFENDERS OF AURITA (62,538 words)

Only updated my fantasy AU epic with one chapter this year, and I’m actually kind of sad I didn’t work on it more. It’s been hard to find muse for it when it hasn’t gotten nearly as much traction as other projects.

PARADISE LOST (13,013 words)

Another new fic started in June, this is a Zootopia AU! Heavily inspired from Zootopia, Beastars, and The Last of Us, it’s an apocalyptic future involving hybrids, people who have animal traits in order to combat a deadly strain of cancer. Plus I just love fox!Lance and rabbit!Pidge.

SCALING BACK (6,041 words)

New fic started in March, this is one I’ve had stewing on the backburner for quite awhile actually, and decided to start. It’s basically canon but Lance is actually a merman and hiding it from the team. It surprisingly fixes a ton of plot holes and fits with canon narrative.

SHATTER AND TESSELLATE (19,661 words)

This new project kind of took over my life if you couldn’t tell from all the art I’ve cranked out this past year for it. Oddly enough the idea just kind of hit me one day in March. I think Rue’s “worst timelines” got me thinking along those lines and I came up with the idea of Honerva seeing into the future and kidnapping the future paladins and turning them galra to prevent Voltron from defeating the Empire. So it’s a Galra AU but in the worst way possible.

SIX IMPOSSIBLE THINGS (7,243 words)

Another new fic started in August, this Wonderland AU I’ve had notes and ideas for since 2018 or something. And it’s hilarious because I thought of Lance being the Cheshire cat long before Pike existed. Thanks to lots of brainstorming on Discord I’ve figured out a lot more worldbuilding for this AU and I can’t wait to expound on it.

SLIDING LEFT MAKES MR. RIGHT (2,788 words)

Crack Tinder AU which says I posted in 2020 but I think I wrote it in November/December of 2019. This is a oneshot and it’s taking me forever to finish because it’s hard for me to write short things lol.

THE VACANT ETHER (31,121 words)

This is from the Stories in the Dark bang back in October 2019 and I’m still working to finish it. Post s8, horror, cosmic Reaper AU. This is a favorite AU of mine because of how nicely it fixes and explains all the plot holes of s8.

WHAT TIDES MAY BRING (20,704 words)

The Mer AU that Rue and I started writing last year! I really adore this AU and the Plance family feels it has, and sadly I’ve been slacking on my end with writing the next chapter but I hope to get more content in before MerMay this year.

WHERE SAPPHIRE ROSES GROW (31,101 words)

I wrote a lot this year for my Beauty and the Beast AU. I’m quite pleased I finally got to the part where Lance learns Pidge is a girl because that’s when things start moving into motion (and obviously the romance starts developing, but still not for awhile yet because I’m a sucker for slow burns).

WHERE THE SUN MEETS THE OCEAN (8,620 words)

I barely touched my Atlantis AU this year. This is another AU that doesn’t get as much love so it’s hard to find muse for it at times.

R E F L E C T I O N S

Best title

I am really fond of Shatter and Tessellate. Not only does it sound pretty and gives great imagery but it’s symbolic of how the paladins are broken and put back together.

Worst title

Probably Paradise Lost. It’s unoriginal (I stole it from the book by John Milton) though it fits the themes of the fic. But I also couldn’t think of anything better and I do find it funny that shortened it becomes PL which is like Pidge/Lance.

Best/worst last line

Best: from Where Sapphire Roses Grow:

She opened her eyes to see Lance looking up at her with his captivating irises as brilliant a blue as the very sapphire rose that cursed him, eyes that were still human.

“I swear to you Lance… I will figure out a way to break your curse.”

Worst: from Paradise Lost:

“Please…” she says in a muffled voice between sobs. “I can't - I can't do this alone."

“You won't have to,” he promises softly as he holds her close. “I'm here. I'm right here..."

Looking back, did you write more fics than you thought you would this year, less than you thought, or about what you predicted?

I wrote uhhh.... way more. Than I thought possible considering all the stress that happened this year. I started six new fics and progressed a ton in others.

What’s your favorite story this year? Not the most popular, but the one that makes you the happiest.

This is a hard one to choose... but based on the content I covered this year for the fic as opposed to the fic itself, I’d have to say Where Sapphire Roses Grow. It’s so fun writing feral Lance and him protecting Pidge from the wolves was one of my favorite scenes to write this year.

Okay, NOW your most popular story.

By a freaking landslide, Shatter and Tessellate. This really caught me off guard - I never thought this fic would be so popular, especially considering it starts out as a kid fic of sorts (paladins are all early teens at first) and most people don’t like kid fics. It’s also quite dark and highkey horror? So I’m shocked it’s so well loved.

Story most underappreciated by the universe?

By far The Vacant Ether. I thought it would gain a lot more traction considering everyone and their dog wants a s8 fix it fic, but then again TVE covers really dark topics and is technically a horror fic. So I shouldn’t be surprised it isn’t for everyone. But I am really happy with how it has turned out, even if less people read it.

Story that could have been better?

All of them Hmm. I feel like Scaling Back could have been more imaginative, considering the second chapter mostly follows the events of a canon episode with little divergence.

Sexiest story?

None of them have really gotten to that point yet... though I have been working on some future steamy scenes for some fics. If I had to pick one though probably Where the Sun Meets the Ocean because Pidge ogles Lance in that one.

Saddest story?

Yikes this is a hard one. I think I have to say Shatter and Tessellate, because not only does that one cover death and kidnapping, but metamorphis and body horror. And it’s all the more sadder because they’re just kids.

Most fun?

I think the one most fun to write is Where Sapphire Roses Grow. I love the time period, I love monster!Lance, I love Pidge and Lance bickering, there’s just so many good points to it. Plus BatB is a classic I loved and grew up with as a kid so it’s really fun to write out the themes I love.

Story with single sweetest moment?

I think Lance comforting Katie in Shatter and Tessellate when she asks him to call her by Pidge from now on fits this one. Lance and Pidge have a lot of little moments like this in this fic but this one in particular is very tender.

“Pidge is cute,” he finally says as he nervously rubs his wrist. “Reminds me of Pokemon.”

She makes a small sound which he thinks is an attempt at a laugh and turns her head to face him, tucking her hair behind her ear. “That’s where Matt got it from, actually.”

He smiles at her. “Is Matt your brother?”

She nods. “I’ve always loved owls, but I had a hard time saying it when I was learning how to talk. I watched Matt play enough video games that I could say ‘Pidgey’ though, and so I started calling any owl I saw as Pidgey. At some point the nickname Pidge stuck.”

Hardest story to write?

Easily The Vacant Ether. It covers a lot of heavy and dark topics and it’s hard to really nail the horror vibe sometimes. But also Sliding Left Makes Mr. Right solely because I can’t write short one-shots to save my life LOL.

Did you take any writing risks this year? What did you learn from them?

Not really? Aside from just... cranking out a ton. I suppose starting 6 new fics can count as taking a risk. Keeping up with all my projects is also a project but I somehow manage to do it.

Proudest Achievement:

I think Shatter and Tessellate reaching so many kudos and hits. I seriously was not expecting that.

What are your fic writing goals for next year?

Just keep writing I guess. I do have two ambitious plans, to finish Not All Pain Heals, my Teen Wolf fic that is long overdue to be finished, as well as The Vacant Ether which is the fic I have planned out the most and would be easiest to finish.

#fanfic writing roundup #2020 stats #Ao3 stats #my fanfics #plance

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the-wintershade · 4 years

Text

— just like oil on my hands

pairing: sam wilson x f!reader x bucky barnes summary: you and sam having a myriad of bonding moments and the thought of falling for him becomes nearly unbearable, but, just when things get serious, there’s always something in the way. wc: 6.5k+ genre: flirting, good banter, heat, awkwardness and tension

Blue Shade: series — masterlist | 04

Sam makes sure to bring you to everything now. It’s as him disclosing his place of complete secrecy has opened up another side of him that you’ve never seen before. Dancing is more exciting, you laugh consistently when you’re together, and you meet up when class isn’t in session.

It’s as if the almost kiss was erased wholly from your memory.

You find out about his obsession with Marvin Gaye and the Trouble Man soundtrack. He’s got the whole album and listens to it almost everyday, but it took you a little bit to pry that slightly embarrassing detail from him.

“Oh, you must really like him.”

“Yeah, he’s pretty good.” He laughs into his coffee as you sit at the table you’ve officially decided to co-parent.

“To have over 300 listens to the same songs is pretty impressive considering that you only recently bought the whole album.” You wiggle your eyebrows and he tries his best to keep a straight face, sputtering into his drink. You grin at his momentary lapse in restraint.

“Well, like I said, Marvin Gaye is the best.” He watches you with a mirthful gaze and you squint your eyes at him, knowing there’s a part he’s not telling you.

“Well, Rachel knows that that’s only partially true.” You lean your head down and pretend that she’s agreeing with you, nodding your head enthusiastically. “That’s exactly right Rachel, he’s hiding something from us. He doesn’t love you like I do, Rachel.”

“Rachel, don’t listen to that. You know that I’ve been coming here consistently these past few weeks and we’ve been listening to the soundtrack together.” He folds his arms and leans back as if he’s won this battle. Ha.

“Everytime, huh?” You nonchalantly take a sip.

“Yep.” He purses his lips in triumph.

“Sounds like this is an everyday occurrence.”

“‘Cause it is.” He retorts and you point directly at him. He sputters through his drink, realizing he’s been caught, trying to scramble for a response.

“Ah—the truth finally comes out. He is legally insane.” You spread your arms in victory, sweet sweet victory. “He’s completely addicted to the soundtrack and cannot go a day without listening to it. Your honor, this case is officially closed; you have all of the evidence you need to convict this man.”

“You can’t prove that.” He chuckles, snatching his phone back to put it safely back in his pocket.

“If you were in love with Marvin Gaye, Sam, all you had to do was say the word.” You take a sip while grinning and he fakes annoyance and rolls his eyes before breaking down in laughter. You follow closely behind him.

…

He also takes you rollerskating. He tries to talk you through it and reassures you that it’s pretty easy. He just wasn’t aware that you used to hit the rink every Friday as a kid and although it’s been a while since you’ve gotten back on the rink, you used to be a pro.

This was going to be easy, but it wouldn’t be that hard to play a little prank on him.

He’d helped you lace your skates up tight enough that your ankles wouldn’t roll and you let him, pretending to be all dainty and unaware of the roller skating experience. You did enjoy taking his hands again as he hoisted you to your feet and held most of your weight, making sure you kept your balance.

He was extremely careful, walking you through the steps as you wobbled and shook heavily on phoney weak and unpracticed legs. His hands were strong and steady, a calming pulse about as soothing as his warm voice guiding you how to weave one foot in and out to create some speed.

“There you go, you got it.” His encouraging voice made you smile, a genuine display of teeth. Of course, it wasn’t because you were making small, fake steps of progress, but because he was willing to be patient with you as you moved through the steps. It made your heart soften and a warmth of pure adoration erupt in your core.

“I think I’m getting the hang of this.” Your legs shook violently and you pretended to stumble. He caught you, his hands gripping your forearms determinedly, not allowing you to even think of falling, drawing you into his strong chest.

He breathed a little slower, looking down at you with concern and laughter. “You alright?”

“Yeah.” You breathed shakily, laying your performance thick. “Let me try again.”

You stood up straight again and gently tugged against his hands. “I want to see if I can do it without you.”

“Okay, just be careful.” He didn’t look convinced that you could do it, but he slowly let go of you, keeping his hands out just in case you needed the security of them again. He made sure to stay close and you allowed yourself a small smirk at his protectiveness and concern.

You winked at him and spun around, taking off around the circle of the rink, sure that your legs and previous experience would be more than capable of supporting your own weight. You even ignored the stopper on the front and slowed your speed by dragging the side of your wheel.

His mouth hung open as you drifted right next to him, turning around to skate backwards. Then he let out a huff in disbelief. “You lied to me.”

“I thought it’d be a great opportunity to find out how good of a teacher you were.” You shrugged in false innocence and made sure to stay slightly out of his reach, even when he started to drift closer.

“And after I laced up your shoes, after I took all this time to walk you through all of the steps.”

“It was a nice added benefit.” You laughed.

“Oh, okay. I see how you wanna play this.” His eyes turned to something darker, losing the bright light they held and morphing into a deeper expression of humor and resolve.

You wasted no time in turning around and taking off, squealing as he rode fast on your heels. Giggles escaped you as his fingertips brushed against your clothing now and again. He eventually gained enough speed to pull you right next to him, forcing you to slow down and face him.

The vestiges of your laughter died down while you looked at him. He wasn’t mad at all. His chest heaved up and down, his teeth spread into a huge grin. “You’re not getting off that easily.”

The ensuing roller skating dance battle was epic.

…

“Keep up, Coffee girl. I saw the way you moved on those skates!” He called over his shoulder as he lapped you, the tall tower near the Lincoln Memorial loomed in the distance as you tried to catch up to him near the reflecting pool.

You huffed, your lungs squeezing with flame, and you struggled to take in air, your mouth crumbly and dry. You’d sweated through your exercise shirt and were about three seconds from passing out.

You should have expected this. Sam was in the military after all and it made sense that the regimen never really goes away that easily, but you hadn’t expected to get ran into the next century. Sure, you could move your way around roller skates, but the wheels did a lot more for you than you actually did for the skates. The running shoes you wore right now weren’t going to assist in keeping your pace. This was all manual labor.

And you hadn’t tried to run in years. Middle school P.E. was likely the last time you ever tried to pace yourself through a measly mile.

You saw him make his way around the halfway point and came to a stop, placing your hands tightly on your knees and taking in as much air as you possibly could in the moment. You closed your eyes, feeling the sweat creating small rivets down your neck and back, clinging to your hair and your clothes. You felt dirty, in deep need of a hot shower and three healthy gallons of water.

“On your left.” Sam huffed past you, but you kept your eyes closed and took in more air until you could feel like you would be able to form a response.

When you opened them, Sam was watching you with that mixture of mirth and worry. “You alright there?”

“Yeah,” You could barely speak the words, the syllables filled with air instead of the ringing of your vocal chords. “I’m okay. Just need a minute.” You closed your eyes again and took deep breaths until you could get your breathing under control.

You heard Sam tread over to you and crouch down in front of you. “Hey.” Your eyes peeled open slowly, and he was right there with a soft smile on his face. “Let’s take it slow.”

You nodded and stood up straight, ignoring the stabs of pain shooting through your side. Sam took his place beside you and started on what was undoubtedly a slow jog for him, but was a manageable pace for you. You ignored the pain, fighting to stay moving.

Sam didn’t treat you with pity or that you would crumble. He stayed right next to you, bringing up topics that you could bicker over or discuss to a deep enough degree to keep your mind off your jog. He was kind and supportive. He took breaks with you when you needed to stop and would slow your pace if you were beginning to struggle again.

He showed you time and time again that he was everything Bucky was not. He was giving you so many reasons why he was better. Why you should choose him.

And everytime, you thought you didn’t deserve him. He doesn’t deserve someone caught up in a relationship with someone else. The longer you dwelled on these thoughts, the sadder you became. A hole opened up, eating through your thoughts of him.

Because you wanted to be that supporting shoulder that he was for you, but you weren’t sure that would ever happen. By the time you got out, it might be too late for Sam. Besides, you had to prove that you weren’t boring, that you could be exciting too. That you could keep a man interested.

Sam picked up on your change in mood and slowed your pace even more. “What’s going on? Thinking about him, again?”

“No.” You shook your head and gave a sad smile. “Something else that’s more important.”

He nodded and smiled. “Well get your head out of the clouds, Coffee Girl. We got three more laps to do.”

You huffed in frustration and gave a sad attempt at a laugh. “People must really call you Falcon for good reason. You just fly around those corners don’t you?”

“You have no idea.”

...

Another day, another dance class. Sam spins you around as usual and dips you down, supporting you as you grab onto his arms. He whips you up and around with a flourish before pulling you back in, the both of you back to swaying to the beat. You let off a giggle as he wiggles his eyebrows at you.

You’ve all been learning choreography for the main dance that will take place pretty soon after the first dances. It’s been fun so far and everyone is picking everything up fast. It’s nice to feel like you’re part of something important.

It will all suck when he finally gets a replacement and he’ll get to dance with some other, more impressive girl. You just try to enjoy it all while you’re still here with him and he’s still willing to entertain your mess of a social life.

You and Natasha spin around each other, changing partners. Clint keeps you at a respectable distance while making sure you get your timing and steps right. “I hope I’m not interrupting anything important.” He grins as he spins you.

“Not at all.” You huff, twirling back to him as you glide around the dance floor. “I trust you and Natasha are having a good time?”

“As always.” He smirks and you dance in a good silence before it’s time to change partners again. “Have fun.” He wishes you with a subcurrent of intentional enthusiasm. You just laugh as he passes you back, Natasha’s red hair becoming a blur. You catch her eyes mid-turn and she winks at you. You grin back.

Sam catches you easily and pulls you back in, making sure you're comfortable before moving. You didn’t notice how close you normally stand while dancing, but the apparent gap between you and Clint made it that more clear. You’re nearly touching his chest and your toes are just a breath apart.

But it wasn’t unusual to you before. It’s comfortable, easy. You don’t bother to change it now, because you like it this way.

You shouldn’t.

But you do.

The instructor moves closer to you. “Great form. You make excellent partners.” She claps in excitement and you both grin abashedly at the direct attention. “I’ll bet you’ll be the next ones to get married.”

Your blood runs cold and your eyes widen involuntarily. The statement carries more weight than she probably intended, but the fact that you’re technically still bound to Bucky brings the world back into focus. Until you can get the current boyfriend situation figured out, there couldn’t be a you and Sam. Not permanently.

No matter what your heart wanted.

No matter how much that statement, as much as it took you off guard, excited you.

Sam sobered as much as you did and stopped moving entirely. He looked to you to gauge your reaction and when he saw your face open in shock, his own frowned, his light dying slightly. Then he steeled himself. “Depends on who catches the bouquet.”

She laughed and gestured for you to continue. You took a deep breath and looked up to him. You both didn’t say anything to each other, but you shared a look of deep understanding of how serious a statement like that was.

…

You step out at a beautiful building with glass doors and racks on racks of differing pants and shirts, ties and cuffs. It’s even more impressive inside. Sam waits for you in a chair outside of the dressing room.

“Hey.” You breathe watching him get to his feet and walk over to you.

“Thanks for coming.” He nods and glances over your outfit. It’s a casual glance, but it sparks a hum of electricity down your spine.

“Yeah, well, the bridesmaid’s were having a fitting and I’m not technically invited so it’s probably a good thing I’m here.” You shrugged, flipping your hair over your shoulder and he laughed richly, rolling his eyes at your show.

Sam shows you to your seat just inside the dressing room, leading you to a place with a good deal of mirrors and a pedestal for the model to stand on. You take a seat on the plush chair and scroll through some ambient notifications, catching up on social media, and sending a few text messages.

Sam asked you a few days ago if you’d come be “quality control” over his choice for a suit. The only stipulation that Steve put on his groomsmen is that the suit needs to be white. It seemed oddly out of character for a man that appeared traditional and old fashioned, but you welcomed the change. You’d heard the bridesmaid dresses were going to be red instead of the pale pink that was usually encouraged. But then again, Peggy did rock a red lip better than anyone else you knew; you had no doubt that her lip color of choice influenced her decision.

Why Sam really needed your help, eluded you. He was a perfectly capable man that was more than equipped to make his own choices and could definitely shop for himself, but you weren’t complaining. He was getting you out of a ridiculous dinner date with Bucky and whatever other work friend he was so hellbent on impressing. Not being there gave you all the energy you needed to focus.

When Sam steps out, your breath catches in your throat. He waves his arms out, letting you see the white suit in action as he spins around. He adjusts his red tie in the mirror before looking back at you. “What do you think?”

You can’t form words. Your brain is having a hard time catching up to what’s going through your mind. How handsome he looks, how the suit is fitted perfectly, how he looks outstanding and beautiful. It’s like you’re back at the boardwalk again.

The white stands out starkly against his chocolate skin and makes it even more heavenly. It’s like white was his color. The only one he should wear for the rest of his life.

“It looks fantastic on you…” Your mouth still hangs open as you speak and it takes effort to control your eyes, keeping them at a normal wideness. You know your tone is dreamy and slightly slurred, but you can’t help it. “You-You look amazing.”

Sam just stares.

“You like?” The tailor flutters around him, adjusting his suit jacket and his pants. It wouldn’t matter if the suit was ill-fitted. He’d still look fantastic and your breath would still have suddenly disappeared from your body.

You nodded absentmindedly, drifting closer to get a good inspection of him. Your fingers reached for his tie, fiddling with it in your grasp and feeling the soft, silken texture. He froze completely now, just watching you adjust his slightly crooked tie. You straightened it.

“Well, good thing quality control was here to fix it for you.” You breathed out, softly chuckling at the end. It helped cover up some of your nerves. Your fingers shook as you kept your hands closed.

His smile was delayed by a good few seconds, but it was followed by a timid laugh, shallow and not a deep as you were used to. He must have felt the same jittery anxiety that you were.

You knew the reasons that you felt this way, but his were even more muddy and less clear.

“You know how these things work, Coffee Girl?” His voice was low, but took on a light and joking tone as he gestured to the tie.

You shook your head with a smirk. “Yes, bell bottoms, I know how to tie a tie properly.”

His following laugh was covered in nerves. He then lowered his eyes so that they were almost leveled with yours, all dark and warming. A fire ignited someone near your core at his gaze. “You don’t have to worry about my tie so much.”

You cleared your throat and turned him around, letting him get a good observation of himself in the mirror. You let your hands linger on his shoulders for a second longer than necessary, feeling the strength of his arms underneath his suit.

The tailor hums in approval. “Yes. Very good. Doesn’t he look good to you?”

The question was a bit more direct than you were prepared for and you sputtered for a second, Sam’s eyes catching yours in the mirror and sending another wave of fresh nervousness pulsing through your system. “Uh, yeah. I guess.” You want to slam your head into the nearest wall. What was that response?

You scratch the back of your head and step out of the way of his continuing adjustments. “No need for bashfulness. I can see the way you look at him.” He flashes a dazzling smile your way as you pointedly duck Sam’s inquiring eyes.

There’s not a response in the world that would be able to fix the conversation or steer it onto a path that would allow you to be honest while ignoring the feelings inside of your chest. You’re really in it now.

You just settle for an, “oh”, as you turn and resume your place on the chair, far out of the reach of touching Sam and away from the tailor’s focused stare.

It’s not the answer that the tailor was expecting and he must have picked up on the growing tension and awkwardness in the room. He weaves around the lapse in conversation like it’s nothing, quickly asking another slightly personal question that’s only that much harder to answer with certainty.

“You two are going to the wedding together, right?” Sam catches your eyes in the mirror and the pressure of a response once again falls on you. You have no idea how to answer this question correctly. It doesn’t seem like Sam has anyone else in mind, but your spot hasn’t been solidified for sure.

Plus, Sam’s looking like he wants you to say yes. Like he knows that there’s no one else, but he wants you to agree, to confirm that you’d be willing to go with him.

You try somewhere in the middle, hoping to not to give anything away.

“We’re dance partners right now, at least until his date can step in.” Sam’s face falls half an inch and he looks away. The tailor doesn’t notice, nor does he catch how instantly you deflate.

He just hums and pauses, watching Sam for a reaction.

Sam shrugs, turning his focus all on the business of tailoring his suit. “More or less.” He concedes.

“The woman that comes to see the tuxedo is always the one that goes to the wedding.” The tailor winks and returns to adding pins where the suit needs material eliminated. Your face still feels heavy and you feel guilty, like you gave a wrong answer on a test.

You stand then, determined to find something else to do to take your mind off of overanalyzing the situation at hand. “I’ll be over here.” You point at the racks near the back of the store full of dress shirts.

You meet Sam’s eyes in the mirror and see all traces of hurt or disappointment are gone. He just smirks at you and nods. You return it the best you can, going over to see what shirts would look good on Bucky, but your heart isn’t in it. It probably wasn’t in it for some time now.

But if you could just prove to Buckty that you could be interesting, then maybe you’d finally be interesting enough for someone else. Maybe you would be good enough for Sam.

You shook your head sadly to yourself.

You could live millions of lifetimes and still never deserve him. He needed someone that wasn’t caught up with someone else or preoccupied with improving herself. He needed someone that knew who she was. You weren’t there yet.

…

“Thank you.” He brushes against your shoulder as he says it. It could be written off as accidental, you do have to be close together on the sidewalk to avoid getting pushed over, but it’s a bit too firm for that to really be the case. His tone is low and courteous. “I’m sorry the tailor was so curious. He likes to keep the conversation going so that it doesn’t become awkward. He has a habit of asking personal questions.”

You smile to yourself and try to ignore how easy it would be to reach out and take his hand. These thoughts are fickle and dangerous. It’s becoming harder and harder not to do the thing you shouldn’t be doing. “It’s not a big deal, Sam, really.”

He cocks his head to the side at your use of Sam. He doesn’t comment on it though and you walk side by side through the streets. At times, he gets a little ahead of you to warn off some of the people that are beginning to get too close for his liking. It’s like he’s creating a path for you.

Then his walk changes; it carries an agitation that it didn’t before. Something’s weighing on his mind. “What’s wrong?” You ask nonchalantly, but know that he’ll recognize you picked up on his subtle changes in body language.

He looks down as you come to a pause at a red light. He searches around the street before he looks at you, taking a deep breath. Your anxiety raises at his hesitation. “I have a preposition for you, Coffee Girl.”

He looks straight at you now and that responding jolt spreads through you again, like it always does now. You try to ignore it as you look right back at him. “Shoot.” You step near him and narrow your eyes, like he’s a criminal spilling his master plan.

He laughs and you breathe a bit better. It’s not too bad if he’s willing to crack a smile at your approach. “What if...I never got a date to replace you? What if you went with me?”

His eyes look so pure and pleading now, it’s hard to look away. But you take a few steps back because you shouldn’t be so excited at the notion of going with him at all. This electricity is wrong, but it’s still happening, regardless of what’s going on in your life right now.

Sam sees the war happening all on your face and tries to backpedal. “Sorry if that was abrupt. If you’re uncomfortable, I can find someone else...”

“No, I want to go.” You fire back the response fast and his shoulders stop climbing, like a weight has been lifted off of them. “I just think I should talk to Bucky first.” And you should, he doesn’t know that he didn’t get another partner and Bucky is your significant other. If you’re going to a wedding with another man, it would be right to let him know about it.

“Okay, so,” He leans in a bit further than necessary, but you let him. You like being in his space. You like being close to him. “If that conversation goes well, you’ll come with me?” His eyes twinkle with hope and you blush at how open it all is. He’s letting you see that, whether he wanted you to or not.

You pretend to think about it, raising your hand dramatically to your chin and stroking it with finesse and refinement. You tilt your nose to sky to emphasize the deepness and complexity of thought that should be going through your mind right now. The pro and cons, the good parts and bad parts of the conversation that you’re going to have to have with Bucky, but it’s all absent. You already know your answer. You knew when he asked.

“Yes, bell bottoms, I’ll go with you.”

…

A day later, you’re knocking on Sam’s door, standing outside pacing to yourself after getting a cryptic text message about getting some extra practice before the rehearsal dinner tomorrow. You don’t really know what’s going through his head, your moves are fine and you’ve both got the steps down to a science, extra practice shouldn’t really be a problem.

But you knew what jitters felt like and you could understand wanting to do it one more time to calm your nerves. Your heart rate flew and a tingling sensation lingered in your fingers and your stomach.

Sam swings the door open, a pleasant smile on his face and a glimmer wafting behind his chocolate eyes.“Come on in.”

His living room is illuminated by soft candle light and the golden glow from a floor lamp. Another Marvin Gaye song echoes gently around the space, its place of origin a boombox on his countertop. You wonder if this is a passtime or if this was something more special. You hope it’s more special.

“Woah, you didn’t tell me you were an interior decorator, bell bottoms.” You’re so in awe of your surroundings, you missed that he’s standing right next to you.

“Are you ever going to let the teasing over the Trouble Man album go?” You smirk at him as you turn, eyes squinted and goading.

“Where do you think the bell bottoms nick-name came from?” You bump his shoulder with yours, but he doesn’t move away or create space when you do; he makes sure to stay just close enough to keep your arms in contact.

“Uh huh.” He hums deep from the core. It sends a buzz through you and you fight down a blush. Then he moves, spreading his arms and taking a few steps back. “Shall we or is this too old-fashioned for your liking?”

You roll your eyes and place your hand firmly in his, putting your trust in him once again, knowing that he won’t let you down. He draws you in, your breath thinning out at the proximity. It’s becoming more tolerable now and doesn’t throw you off as much as it used to, losing your breathing rhythm around him. It calms you down, helps you focus.

He’s eyes are dark and alluring as he watches you, adjusting his positioning until he’s satisfied that you’re comfortable. “Are we going to be letting Mr. Gaye sing us through this one?” You inquire in faux innocence and watch as his face twists into a humorous disdain.

“You, Ms. (last name), need exposure to real music.” He takes a step which you take with him, already knowing where he’s going from here as you begin the spins at a slightly faster pace than you’re used to in order to keep up with the beat.

“Real music, huh?” He spins you outward before drawing you back close in again, another jolt shooting through your blood.

“Yes.” He says it with a seriousness that silences you, but then he’s all smiles and smirks again and you wonder what you were expecting from a man with the nickname of Falcon. “Now just listen.”

“I’ll try.” You sway together, waiting for your cue before the next performance of turns and spins occur. You like this. You like his warm hands and eyes and glowing personality. How you can relax around him and not feel like you have to watch everything you say. How you fit together, like two halves of a charm that only fit around each other.

You close your eyes and listen, catching a few lines before you’re twirling away from him in a mix of gold and brown.

Yeah, darling you're not wasting my time What I see baby is so hard to find

…

A lightheadedness from all the dancing put a pause on your swaying session and giggle marathon. There were numerous times that you had to completely redo moves from laughing so hard. You almost fell over each other at times.

A funny spasm moved through your chest as you leaned your neck against the back of his sofa, trying to cool off while Sam brought water over. He placed the glass in your hand, a stark contrast from the warmth that he always pulsed into your skin.

You thanked him before drinking a bit, nodding along to another soft Marvin Gaye song in the background. You felt him watching you as he sat next to you, downing half of his glass. “Never met someone who likes Marvin Gaye so much for a person who claims they don’t like old music.” He smirked knowing over at you.

You shooed him with your hand. “I never said I didn’t like old music; I just mention and frequently tease you about your addiction to the music from the 70s. That’s got nothing to do with the quality of the music.”

Sam grins widely as he goes to get another sip of water before setting the glass down and smiling. You cup your drink in your hand, letting the coolness of the glass keep your body temperature lowered.

He leans back, sighing with happiness and you can’t help the small smile of happiness that spreads across your cheeks at his contentment. He’s infectious. “You know, I haven’t had this much fun in a while, thank you for coming.”

You let your head roll back as you look over to him. “Me neither. Thanks for being such a gracious host.”

His grins at your goofy head angle and weirdly moving eyebrows. Then he looks down and sobers up, his face losing some of the glow it already had. You sit up. Something’s coming, you can feel it.

You set your glass down and lean forward. “Did you ask him yet?” He doesn’t look at you, even when you stare at him for a minute before responding. You wish he would. You just need him to look so you can know what he’s feeling.

You hate putting him here. You hate that Bucky’s such a problem between you two.

You sigh and run your fingers through your hair, angling your body away from him. You don’t want him to feel like you’re pressuring him to accept the response you’re going to give him. “No. He’s out of town right now. He has been for a day or two.”

Sam narrows his eyes and fixes you with a hard stare, his tone ice compared to his smooth and gentle character. “He’s gone a lot for someone who loves to watch your every move.”

“Oh, he’s cheating. But then again it was never really official to begin with.” Sam’s eyes bug out of his head, but you know better than to take that at face value. He already knew. He’s just trying to act shocked for your sake.

“He what?” His voice sounds dumbstruck, but it’s still not enough to fool you.

“You don’t have to pretend to be surprised. I know you know.” You reached down to take another sip of your drink and let the liquid cool you down, slow down your brain so you could give clear answers that weren’t riddled with anger.

Sam sits for a moment watching you. He sighs, looks away, and then turns towards you. His jaw works and no words come out so you fill the silence.

“I’m just waiting. I think this will go away at some point. I’m just trying to be more interesting and exciting. I think that’s why I lost him the last time.” You fiddle with your pants to keep from facing Sam’s pointed stare.

“So dancing with me is just to be more interesting?” He sounds hurt and starts to turn away, but you catch him.

“No.” You make sure that’s firm and look directly at him as you say the word. He freezes in place and has to look away. “I’m dancing with you because that was genuinely something I was interested in doing. That had nothing with trying to make him jealous or trying to get him back, that was completely my own choosing.”

He had to understand, this whole thing had nothing to do with Bucky. It had everything to do with your choice and what you wanted to do. It wasn’t something you felt like you had to do to win Bucky back. You wanted this.

Sam doesn’t seem completely convinced. You scoot closer and place a delicate hand on his shoulder, squeezing it to get him to look at you. His eyes cut, but you’re determined to make him understand. To make him believe you. “Do you think I would still be here if I didn’t choose this. If this was my strategy, obviously it’s doing nothing to get him back and it would be in my best interest to leave, right? Why am I still going to classes and hanging with you if I didn’t want to be here?”

He nods and you breathe out a breath you weren’t aware you were holding. You start to let your hand fall from his shoulder, but he catches it, pulling it closer to his chest and drawing your eyes to his sad and pleading gaze. “You deserve better.” He utters it softly and an emotional wall breaks at his words.

You feel tears start to form near your eyes. It’s been so long since you’ve heard someone tell you that you’re worth more than what you’re in. You have to look away, too caught in his eyes and the way that walls are starting to come down.

You take a breath and when you’re sure that there are no traces of sadness or pain, you gently draw your hand and it hurts. You don’t want to pull back, but you have to do the right thing. You have to do what’s right, even when it’s the most painful thing you could do.

“I think I should go,” You stand and Sam jumps up inhumanly fast before you, slightly blocking a straight shot to the door. You don’t feel trapped, more like he doesn’t want you to leave. “I don’t want you to feel any worse about the situation.”

“Wait.” He says in a soft whisper. He takes your hand again, slowly, curling your fingers together delicately. “Just one more dance.”

Sam doesn’t let your hand go as he clicks to another song, a sweet and simple guitar and vocal combination filling the room. He rests his hand on your hip, his warmth bleeding through the fabric of your shirt, tucks you close to him, and sets you to a sway.

You don’t perform any of the moves you’ve learned in class, no waltzes or spins, just you and him and a beat.

Eventually, from enough courage and fatigue catching up with you, you lean your head against his chest, wrapping your free arm around his torso and listening to his fast but steady heartbeat. You feel his head dip down to lean where your head lays, a hand splaying on your back to curl you into him. The tears almost well up again, but you just close your eyes and feel him, concentrating on his closeness and the caring way he responds to you.

Just like a song in my heart

A hand on your cheek pulls you back and your gaze flashes up to his, a deep fire simmering in your chest reflected in his eyes. You can feel the kiss coming this time and you know you’re not strong enough to resist it. You close your eyes and tense, waiting for his lips to meet yours.

But they never do.

Instead, a soft kiss presses against your temple and lingers.

When you open your eyes, your heart almost breaks from his open eyes and the adoration and sorrow in them. You hope he can see how sorry you are. Maybe in another place in a different time. It’s the only thing you can trust to do, silent communication. Anything else, and you’ll completely crumble.

Sam presses an invitation into your hand. Come, his eyes say and you smile and tuck it into your pocket for safekeeping.

The song ends bittersweetly and Sam walks you to the door, still holding your hand tightly in his. You stand on your tippy toes, the kiss still warm and pulsing from your forehead. He begins to lean down, knowing what’s coming and eager to make it easier for you. Just when you’re about to give him another kiss on the cheek, you get a text.

Bucky: It’s done. I broke up with her. You’re the one for me

Just like oil on my hands.

#wintershade #sam wilson #sam wilson x reader #blue shade #sam wilson fanfic #sam wilson fanfiction #ms:blue shade #sam:blue shade #this is probably my favorite part #besides the next one #we love some good fluff and pure hearted interactions

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bluescarletdiamond · 4 years

Text

TharnType the Series: Ep. 6 Review

THARNTYPE LETS GOOOOOOOO. I’m super excited they have AMAZING chemstry

Section 1

Y'all it hasn’t begun but this girl better not ruin shit !!!!

it STARTED AND ALL I HAVE TO SAY TO TYPE IS: THE GAY IS HERE TO STAY BABY

“Thinking of you” D I S G U S T I N G

Type better not ask Tharn to have sex while he’s being a little hoe ESPECIALLY since he knows of Tharn’s feelings and already told him they are casual lovers not just sex friends so just know imma throw hands

I also love my eggs sunny side up, Tharn love me instead pls

THARNS SMILE MAKES MY HEART GO UWU

Tharn staring at Type texting that girl has me not uwu tho

Random side not: I’m a graphic designer and I love the posters on their wall

“You sent this handsome angel to save me” Your gay jumped out son lmao jk but I live for this broship

I’m also a musician and Tharn’s hold on those sticks aren’t that bad lol

Also imagine if Techno ended up falling for Tharn LMAO

MY HEART THARN IM SO SORRY MY LOVE UGH THEY WAY HE DROPPED HIS STICKS :((((((((

Section 2

Miss me with that straight shit Type

Type just got back to the dorm and I know Tharn about to beat his ass (metaphorically lol)

Okay y'all serious shit: I know they aren’t dating but Type KNOWS of Tharn’s feelings, and he, HIMSELF called them casual lovers which of course is not the same as dating but he could have at least told Tharn since they never stated no strings attached and when you say “casual lovers” with no established boundaries, you gotta still consider the other person’s feelings smh

Also Type did not have to PUNCH my mans, a simple slap would’ve been fine lol but Tharn shouldn’t have said that especially after Type told him he didn’t like that

Oh Type my boy…

On the other hand, Tharn needs to respect the fact that Type says he’s not interested… like I understand chasing after the one you love but obvious this man has internal turmoil that he has to accept and smooth out before he can try anything

Also Tharn crying got me crying no joke

Klui and Seo are such an interesting dynamic to this show lmao idk how I feel about them

Also how can Type just go and sleep like that lol

I LOVE THARN’S BFF HE’S SO CUTE AND I LOVE HIM WITH MY WHOLE HEART I just want his happiness

TYPE IS A DICK FOR SEND THAT LIST BUT AT LEAST BOUNDARIES ARE TRYING TO BE ESTABLISHED

I feel like Techno low-key knows about them

You can tell Type doesn't want to stop liking him lol

Section 3

The lighting of the room is beautiful

oop, Tharn’s not there when Type arrived cue lonely and needy feelings

OHFSODFJS. NEVER MIND HE WAS JUST IN THE BATHROOM LMAOOOO

that was embarrassing lol

OOP Tharn really said that shit ( basically they are just fuck friends, no strings attached and they can just fuck when the other feels the need to)

I’m not happy about it but whatever the story has to progress

Type being pissed and thinking too hard while on his date with Pufai got my rolling on the floor

“Where you thinking of other girls” nah m8 he was thinking of a boyyyyyy

BRUH Type crossing his fingers while telling a lie has me DED

Pufai got balls I wish I had no cap

a pinky promise ooooffffff we already know he will break that shit

OOP sex scene lolololol it’s so awkward (because of what’s going on lol) I CANNOT

Holy shit I forgot about Tharn’s performance :(((((((((((((((((((((((( I’m sad now

first, you can tell type is stressed and also disappointed he can’t make it which makes it sadder

and it’s even sadder that he struggled to say that he was going to ask Pufai to be his girlfriend

THARN’S SUPPORT GOT ME CRYING BECAUSE HOW CAN MY MANS DO THAT TO HIMSELF AND LIKE I CAN’T IMAGINE HOW HARD HE STRUGGLED TO GIVE HIM SUPPORT AND NOW TYPE IS MAD CONFUSED

these bitches got to stop playin with my emotions

MY BOY IS CRYING OSDFNISLDLUDFISODFSODU IM MAD IM THROWING HANDS SOMEONE HOLD ME BACK OR ELSE IM GONNA MAKE SURE TYPE DOESN’T SHOW UP INTHE NEXT EP

we love supportive friends :)

“tall, dark, handsome” idk about the “dark” part lol but everything else is trueeeee

unrelated but that wrapping paper and bow work is ASTONISHING (I love wrapping gifts lol)

ooof straight kiss - ight imma head out

lol never mind they didn’t kiss whew

YALL HE THOUGHT OF THARN WHILE ON HIS DATE IMMMM?????

Plus he didn't look disgusted that he thought of him uwuwuwuw

OHP they better not try shit or I really will throw hands and kachow Type’s ass of to another planet

“it might be a choice when you move off campus” bITCH GET OUTTA HERE NO ONE ASKED

she’s really trying to catch these hands

Section 4

Tharn has gorgeous hair and if Type doesn't wanna run his hands through those beautiful strands then I WILL

?? someone walked in

WOAH OWAH AOFHSDFO SDOFISDJFSODF. WHAT

He’s hugging Tharn from the back Im allllsdjf aosdjfaos

and he’s apologizing holy crap im

what HAPPEND FS:IOFH

OH SHIT HE SLEPT WITH HER

and he’s sorry about it???

He SAID IT PAINS HIM TO THINKT THST THARN WOULD SLEEP WITH SOMEONE elsSJDf

But he slept with Pufai…

OISJFOISDJF OH SHIT HE SAID TAT WHILE SLEEPING WITH HER HE JUST KEPT THINKING OF THARM IM SALFJODSJFS UWUWUWUWU TO THE MAX

YALL IMMMMM CRRYYYYINGNNG

awww my boy Type didn’t actually sleep with her because he couldn’t do it with a woman

Tharn is struggling to believe it fadskjrvfewnio

TYPE JUST SAID HE ONLY WANTS TO BE WITH THARN IM OVVVVEEER THE MOOOONNNNNNN

“FORGIVE ME ONE MORE TIME” MY HEART IS COMBUSTING

Type is crying :(((((((((((((((((

but they’re hugging and it’s so cute and obvious than is forgiving

Type is struggling so hard to accept himself for his past and applaud him so much

“I’ve always been yours” Iisdiofhis urdbfgdshfighsdfliughHOSHD

YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO THEY ARE KISSSINGGGGGG AND ITS BEAUTIFUL

Highkey EVERY THAI BL has to learn from them because they have sooooo much chemistry and are in the best kissers I’ve seen

TYPE TOLD PUFAI THAT HE’S ALREADY SEEING SOMEONE

BRUH SHE SLAPPED HIM good for her??? idk man

“I told her I’m dating someone” y’all remember when I said Type was gonna catch these hands? Yeah I meant because I’m gonna hug the living shit of him 🥰🥰

“I feel like I’m having sex with a man because I’m desperate” y’all remember when I said I wanted to hug him yeah no I meant STRANGLE HIS ASS

“I was gonna break it off with you” YALL SEE MY BOY TYPE’s FACE :((((

Also Tharn rubbing/playing with Type’s ear/hair is what’s KEEPING ME GOING RN

“But because I was afraid you were going to break it off with me first” IM CRYING DURING CLASS YALL

“I want to hear you scream without holding back” BIEJAJDBSKKS IM SCREECHING RN 😳😳😳

“Then let me have my way with you all night” “suit yourself” WHY ARE THEY LIKE THIS I CANT HOLY SHIT

Wow they really cut it off without showing us shit 😡

Bruh type still being unsure is so realistic because even tho he admitted his feelings it doesn’t mean he’s gonna be all content now but it was at least relieving for him I bet to be able to express his bottled up feelings

“I remember that ... we are together” 🥳🥳🥰🥰🥰

TYPE OPENING HIMSELF UP TO BE MORE TOUCHY AND PLAYING WITH THARNS HAIR GOT ME SCREAMING

OH WORd h

HeS REACHING

Shit aHE KISSED HIM OMFG THAT WAS THE CUTEST SHIT

That such a weird angle to kiss at tho lmaoooo

Ugh that was so cute imma go and cry

Type still not being able to complete accept his feelings is so realistic I love it

Okay I don’t understand this next couple like at all?? Like their point in the story ? What they contribute to the plot? If someone can let me know that would be litty titty

TAJA THEY ARE SLEEPING ON THE SAME BED IM

I can already tell that Types dad is a poopoo head 😤

HES ASKING HIS DAD TO LET HIM MOVE OUT SO HE CAN BE WITH THARN IM

THARNS SMUG ASSBI CANT

“I just make sure you can’t refuse me” HOLY M-

Type’s smile is the cutest thing I’m-

The preview

YALL IDK WHAT HAPPENED BUT THE END WHERE TYPE IS DRESSED WITH THE OVER SIZED SHIRT AND HE IS FINALLY HAPPILY GOING WITH THARN’S MOVES GOT ME 🥵🥰🥰

#tharntype the series: review #tharntype #tharntype the series #bluescarletdiamond reviews

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brownsugarrilakkuma · 5 years

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50 questions tag~

tagged by @neochamomiletea

1. what takes up too much of your time? Scrolling through Tumblr, playing Pocket Camp, and watching YouTube videos.

2. what makes your day better? Sushi and talking to my best friends.

3. what’s the best thing that happened to you today? The Pizza Hut by my house finally got our order right.

4. what fictional place would you like to go? Right now? My camp in Animal Crossing Pocket Camp.

5. are you good at giving advice? I guess so because everyone always comes to me lmaoo.

6. do you have any mental illness? Not professionally diagnosed but I do have family history for a few.

7. have you ever experienced sleep paralysis? I don’t think so.

8. what musician inspired you the most? This answer changes based on who I’m obsessed with at the moment typically. I’d say the most consistent would be Rihanna. Once I became Navy my loyalty has never swayed. I love her idgaf I’m here to have fun and get paid attitude. She’s also so ride or die for her friends and family and like same. However, I’d be lying if I didn’t mention I literally call my closet the ‘SHINee closet’ due to my posters of Jonghyun and Taemin hanging up in their. Eventually I plan to put more SHINee centric posters up as long as I have space. They’ve inspired me to continue to push through hard times when I’d much rather give up.

9. have you ever fallen in love? Romantically? Not yet *Baekho voice* WHERE U AT??!!

10. what’s your dream date? I want to go somewhere with good food where we either get to either walk around and talk or be able to sit in the same place until the place is ready to close.

11. what do others notice about you? My skin and hair. I’ve had so many random women either complement my skin (usually wearing makeup but I guess that means I do know how to apply foundation) or my hair (colored or when I was natural).

12. what is the annoying habit you have? I don’t ask for help.

13. do you still talk to you first love? Nope.

14. how many ex’s do you have? None.

15. how many songs are on your playlist? My Cheer Up playlist has 122 song but that’s in progress.

16. what instruments can you play? None because I got impatient and gave up.

17. who do you have the most pictures of? As of today I have 272 pictures and gifs and counting of Johnny on my phone and I’m not ashamed of it (cause that’s my mans). But uhhh I also have 100 pictures and videos of my cat Penelope saved on my phone too. It’s up to you to decide which is sadder lmao.

18. where would you like to go before you die? Too many to list. Definitely Tokyo, Seoul, and Shanghai.

19. what is your zodiac? Gemini sun, Aquarius moon.

20. do you relate to it? Too well.

21. what is happiness to you? Being able to be yourself unapologetically around people you love.

22. are you going through anything right now? I should have a royal title by now for all the years I’ve been going through it.

23. what’s the worst decision you’ve ever made? Anytime I decided against listening to my gut knowing she’s right 99.999% of the time.

24. what’s your favourite store? At first I was thinking either Nordstrom Rack or TJ MAXX but TJ MAXX has a good mix of skincare, makeup, bras, furniture, and food stuff like teas and cookies from brands you’ve never heard of along with interesting designer pieces. I like the hunt.

25. what’s your opinion on abortion? I’m 100000000000% on board. As many as that person wants/needs to have.

26. do you keep a bucket list? I have a mental list of shit I would like to get done if I was more disciplined.

27. do you have a favourite album at the moment? Not really. I have some favorite songs I listen to off of some of my favorite albums released this year. I listen to playlist more than full length albums. Or all 1000+ songs on shuffle.

28. what do you want for your birthday? I like money gifts from family. My friends always get me perfect gifts. I think they get what my interest are better than my family members do.

29. what are most peoples first impression of you? I don’t know I never ask.

30. what age do you seem according to most people? I always get aged down 4-5 years. Most recently a neighbor asked me what my plans were after I graduate high school this year. I’m 24.

31. where do you keep your phone while you’re sleeping? Next to the wall where my charger is.

32. what word do you say the most? What, wow, and whack are my top three reactions to most things.

33. what’s the oldest age you would date? Ideally I wouldn’t want to go older than 4 years. Like at least at some point we’d been in high school at the same time so we’d have some life experiences we’d have in common. But like if we click we click.

34. what’s the youngest age you would date? Idk like 3 or 4 years? My response is about the same as the last one. I couldn’t image dating someone that much younger but life be like that sometimes. As long as they’re of age.

35. what job/career do most people say would suit you? A writer or designer.

36. what’s your favourite music genre? Deep house has become a recent fave of mine over the last like 4 years. I like having music I could vibe to or dance to at any moment. I’m here to have a good time.

37. if you could live in any country in the world, where would it be? I want to retire to the Tuscany region of Italy. Pretty much all of the countries I would want to live in are just as expensive as the US.

38. what is your current favourite song? Puzzle Moon by GWSN

39. how long have you had this blog for? May of 2012 although I think I deleted some of my earlier posts. I’ve switched names and themes a lot.

40. what are you excited for? WayV!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And other new music in 2019.

41. are you a better talker or listener? Listener. I have good ideas but sometime I struggle articulating them and once I get it, it’s too late.

42. what is the last productive thing you did? i got some sewing done.

43. what do you want for christmas? I had a long list like every year. My mom did get me this Fashionary book I wanted. No Airpods yet.

44. what class do you get the best grades in? English, History, and Art

45. on a scale from 1-10, how are you feeling right now? 10, I just had pizza

46. what can you see yourself doing in 10 years? Still being on my bullshit

47. when did you get your first heartbreak? When Fall Out Boy went on hiatus in like 2008/2009

48. at what age do you want to get married? Uhh idk. I’m indifferent

49. what career did you want to have as a child? i wanted to be in a girl group, an actress, and a fashion designer....so Beyonce, I wanted to be Beyonce

50. what do you crave right now? ...more pizza. I’m hungry again.

I’m gonna tag: @agust-ds, @thejoong, @itslovingjungkookoclock, @yerim-5hinee, and @aqsun (idk if you’ve done this one but I know you’ve done some other tags so I didn’t tag you in those and you don’t have to do this either but I do like you so I want to include you in things like this too but I’m shy so sorry for the long explanation lmao)

#so yeah i'm just clearing shit out #so yall can ignore this #just nye things #i do enjoy oversharing so youd think i'd finish these faster #i mostly run this blog on mobile #i always say im going to talk more on main and i never do it #i usually do that on the sideblog now

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junker-town · 4 years

Text

Everything about this NFL season is breaking our brains

Photo by Tim Warner/Getty Images

At this rate, the playoffs are going to be pure chaos.

Alright NFL, you did it. You broke me. Are you happy? I don’t think it’s too much to ask that after 13 weeks, the league could give us a basic idea of which teams were good, which ones were bad, and who might have a chance to make it to the Super Bowl. Instead I sit here, a sad and broken man, without any clue what the actual hell is happening in the NFL.

Platonic ideals of parity aside, this season has completely gone off the rails. Rewind two months ago and it all felt so easy. The Patriots and Chiefs would likely contend for the AFC Championship. On the other side, you had the 49ers and the Saints. Now, who knows?

I’m truly left feeling like this is going to be a weird trap year when an obvious favorite flames out in the first round to some barely-.500 team in the kind of shocking postseason that leads to discussions about whether the whole system needs to be revamped.

Let’s start with the AFC. So you have the Patriots, but they don’t look invincible this season, not by a long shot. Losing to the Texans on Sunday night seriously damaged any absolute faith you could have in this team. The natural progression is to say, “Well, maybe the Texans really are that damn good.” Except they’ve lost to the PANTHERS this season and got decimated by the Ravens.

So then we go to the Ravens. They seem incredibly good and are coming off a big win over the 49ers to improve the resume. Lamar Jackson is playing some of the most exciting football in the NFL, period. They definitely fit the bill. Then you remember they lost to the Browns and barely scraped by against the Bengals.

The Bills? Look. I’m excited for Bills fans, but it’s going to be a cold day in hell when I anticipate anything positive for the Bills. Trust me, Bills fans don’t want anyone saying they have a chance at winning anything for fear of a jinx, and I’m much happier not going through a table in a frozen parking lot.

The AFC could be an Occam’s razor situation. Maybe the simplest answer is the correct one, which causes us to circle back to the Chiefs. Ah yes, the Chiefs. Easily the NFL’s must-watch team at the start of the season. They then went on to lose to ... the Texans and Colts.

If you can make sense of this, I’d love to hear it. All I see is a complete crapshoot that logically can only end with the Ryan Tannehill-led Titans finding a back door into the playoffs, beating the Patriots or Chiefs and playing ultimate spoiler.

Surely things must be more normal in the NFC, right? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

The Saints are the hot pick, and it’s understandable. Veteran team, Drew Brees, they’ve already clinched their division, the whole nine yards. When the Saints are good, they’re damn near unbeatable, and when they’re bad, they lose by 17 to the Falcons, which is an actual thing that happened less than a month ago. And lest we forget, they needed an undrafted kicker in Carolina to shank a 28-yard field goal to survive against the Panthers a mere week ago.

The 49ers are in the picture too. They’re at 10-2 and really are the total package. A stout defense with a young, exciting offense. There’s no reason to bet against them when a prospective playoff run is on the cards — except that loss to the Seahawks. “It was overtime,” you might say, to which I’d remind you that San Francisco got a serious scare from the Cardinals, Steelers, and Washington this year, all of which came down to single digits.

Drop a level and we have the Packers, Seahawks, and Vikings. They suffer this same weird round-robin effect of ugly losses, close scares, and unconvincing victories that make it tough to really get on board in a meaningful way.

This season is so wacky that Washington at 3-9 isn’t just in the playoff hunt — it could still win the NFC East.

Nine teams below .500 could still make the playoffs with four weeks left in the season.

I need to stop think about this. Let’s go around the league.

This juke is poetry.

Lamar juked him right out of his shoes @Lj_era8 pic.twitter.com/eVVxNrMnct

— The Checkdown (@thecheckdown) December 1, 2019

Yes, I know it was wet on the field — but stop trying to hate on fun. Lamar Jackson is just so damn fun to watch. The only thing that would have made this clip better is if Jackson literally caused people to lose their shoes, which I also fully expect to happen by the end of the season.

I love this play more than life itself.

PUNTER TO KICKER TOUCHDOWN! The @MiamiDolphins pull off the trickery! #PHIvsMIA : FOX : NFL app // Yahoo Sports app Watch free on mobile: https://t.co/uPnyeJSIAR pic.twitter.com/lf4M4xFvVO

— NFL (@NFL) December 1, 2019

There is nothing more perfect in this world than a punter throwing a touchdown to a kicker. It’s two unlikely flavors that somehow go together — like pickles and peanut butter (trust me, try this). In any event, not only is it the kind of bald-faced weirdness I can get behind for a team whose season is over, but it was incredible enough that it rectified one of the worst NFL plays of all time and proved that somehow this can work.

Maybe the best part of this play is that it’s called “The Mountaineer Shot.” I’m a fan of any play that sounds like the most dangerous moonshine you’re ever going to drink.

Congrats Florida, for spawning the dumbest NFL fans of the season.

We got anti-vaxers here at Bucs-Jags. First time I’ve seen that crowd at an NFL game. pic.twitter.com/6OkcYF9gGb

— JennaLaineESPN (@JennaLaineESPN) December 1, 2019

I like the referee imagery, though. It’s on brand. Nothing says “making a grave mistake while turning a blind eye” better than a ref. It’s just a shame you can’t go to instant replay when your kid contracts measles.

Or in Arkansas’ case, the mumps.

Arkansas athletics released a statement yesterday about the Mumps incident on the U of A campus. Sources tell me the number of football players with Mumps is significant.

— Trey Schaap (@trey1037TheBuzz) November 27, 2019

The effective end to the Panthers’ season is sadder than you could ever imagine.

Here’s fourth-and-the-season for the Panthers. pic.twitter.com/VresISdjTj

— Bill Barnwell (@billbarnwell) December 1, 2019

Kyle Allen running serpentine out of the frame is a metaphor for Carolina’s entire season. It’s just so sad — especially when you see that No. 13, Jarius Wright, was open in the end zone for almost the entire play.

Until Allen left like Poochie.

Carolina lost to Washington and while the Panthers’ season isn’t technically over ... it’s totally over.

Shoutout to the Jets for truly bringing futility to new levels.

It takes a special level of skill, determination, and horrible play to lose to the 0-7 Dolphins and the 0-11 Bengals in the same season. It’s community outreach. Nobody is better at making the rest of the country feel slightly better than the Jets.

I’d like to submit an alternate lip reading ...

Brady: "Guys, listen up. We gotta be faster, quicker, more explosive..." pic.twitter.com/kUcB1UR0OI

— Vikings Blogger (@firstandskol) December 2, 2019

“Guys, we got a beef ... STOP! Hey. We got a fondue set! Cook quicker! Cook everything! If you f*** up one more onion. Alright?! Make you you poach the chicken OFF THE BONE! Everyone on the same page? Good because we’re running out of f***ing oil and I’m not eating Top Ramen.”

I’ll let you be the judge. Either he said something to try and motivate his team, or he was unhappy with the fondue preparation on the sideline. I know which truth I believe.

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survivormarmoreal · 5 years

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Episode #13: "im so EMO (TION)" - Bryce

I cant believe that im still here. And we have majority. 3 vs 2. Matt is coming to me know saying that he wants to work with me but like. Bruh. But that could be good tho having him. I have to see what happens with immunity first.

OKOKOKOK CAN WE JUST DISCUSS HOW AM I A FUCKING GOAT. FIRST OF ALL Jock destroyers was a pretty dominant alliance i played a SNITCH RAT GAME with exposing plans and i was lied to but like can i get some credit here like first of all it was my fucking ideal to even force a tie, bryce wanted sharky out he didn't want rocks i wanted rocks when my ass was literally on the line here and i was still willing to go to rocks because i don't want to be a fucking goat and do what bryce or sharky wants this is the only way i could get brian SHARKYS #1 ALLY out of the game so that you know who sharky's #1 ALLY IS NOW FUCKING ME. so you know what yeah i'm a goat, greatest of all time actually and i at least deserve some level of credit or respect here to pull some shit off like this. only person on the fucking tribe with the balls to do this shit and i don't even have balls. OK BYE.

i literally dont have words. i keep having meltdowns and like its so not like me i usually just treat games as fun but im just so upset bc brian went home when we could have prevented it and now im in a spot where annabelle and sharky control things and im basically going to get 5th. i really thought i was doing something and life came at me real quick and said learn ur place KJFSHKJDFHSKJ. like the play anna made was smart so go her i just hate that i got played and that brian left with the vote steal and that my game is ruined and i came so far and i thought i was playing alright also i hate how everyone and their mother keeps calling me out for playing the middle KJSFHFKS like grow up and shade me in ur confessionals not to my face im SENSITIVE AUBRY. basically the point is: https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/506665419092918273/541697763788980225/image0.jpg

I'm SHOCKED. I swore to Annabelle I wouldn't right her name down. And yet she writes my name down! And just as I was thinking I could trust Bryce HE RALLIES VOTES AGAINST ME! I'm so pissed off, and scared, and hurt, and now I have to scramble to figure something out.

Okay let recap everything that has gone down in this 24 hours since I was betrayed. So I talked to Annabelle A LOT. Basically we've talked to each other a ton. I discover that Anna made the plan for the tie and then Bryce was only willing to flip if the vote was for me. SHADY. I knew I should have never trusted him. So basically either I convince Annabelle to save me, everyone goes to rocks, or Matt and Brian flip on me and I go home. I would have said the last one was super unlikely. So I start busting my ass to sway Annabelle. We have really opened up to each other about our games, she is feeling like she has to make a big move. I talked to her about how I feel hurt because I've busted my ass all game to save Anna and Matt and now they both seem unwilling to save me. I tell the guys we just have to be nice but imply to her she stands no shot of making the end without me and how Bryce is going to win. She has no idea we have the vote steal so Brian/Matt would definitely get Bryce out next. So I go to sleep thinking we are making progress. I wake up an Anna is like "Matt was rude to me so I'm definitely not flipping" so I'm starting to feel really hopeless. And then Matt and Brian both started to dodge the idea of rocks. And Anna is telling me Bryce thinks Matt is probably going to flip. So i'm thinking it's over. And in the FB Bois chat Matt and Brian both keep being like "I'm so conflicted" "we'd be guaranteed f4" "blah blah blah" So now I'm realizing these two aren't willing to go to rocks for me. I've spent this whole season trying to save our alliance at any cost. And now that I'm the one in danger...they aren't willing to take the risk. SO now I get it. I've been too nice. If they are going to put their games above mine and aren't willing to risk it so all 3 of us can make F5...I'm going to have to make sure we take that risk because it's my only shot. So I pitch to Anna a way she can get her rocks and I can be safe. We tell them that Anna agrees to save me. That way they think were set and it'll all work out and then it'll go to rocks and I'll be safe. It's super risky and I'm putting all my faith in Annabelle and I feel so scared and guilty and idk but this is the only way I survive and there is a chance Anna goes and it all works out. But...it's also not lost on me that Anna is willing to risk her own game to save me...but my own alliance isn't. I'm feeling...weird.

Brian went home. I...honestly am just feeling horrible. And he was so mad at me. Like mad to the point that I'm worried I ruined a real life friendship over this game. And Matt is furious too and he's going off on me in our group chat which fucking sucks. Like that was the worst case scenario for me. And it sucks. But I shouldn't have to feel bad about this. Like both Brian and Matt were willing to vote me out so they didn't have to go to rocks. They put their game first so why am I a villain for doing the same thing? And they want to be like "we were up front with you about not being sure" like that's supposed to make me feel better. Yeah of course you were honest you weren't the ones in danger. It's easy for y'all to be honest when you're just going to vote me out. I couldn't have been honest with them or they would have flipped and I would have gone home. How do they not see that? Was I supposed to just give up? How is that fair? And how is it that they can vote me out and I just have to accept that but they can't accept that I saved myself. I'm feeling super alone, like I can't trust anybody, and like my best friends won't even take a second to look at it from my point of view. Of course I feel terrible. I just hope this doesn't come between genuine friendships.

ANNA REALLY JUST CLOCKS ME AND SHE KNOW SHE CAN BC WHAT ELSE AM I GOING TO DO. me matt maynor better be this f3 matt might win tbh but idc! anna has CROSSED ME and like laughs in my face FKJADSHFKAJ like yes ur iconic yes u did #that but im in this game with u and its a lil rude to flaunt ur success at me FKJADSHFAKJ when i do sth good i would never constantly bring it up (btw i won immunity once and got that cute blue color so everyone is jealous prob...) also im so emo i miss dennis and i miss brian they were the 2 ppl who i felt close to in the game and theyre both gone i literally am so upset i feel like if i wasnt so busy before tribal i could have talked to brian more and convinced him he had to vote sharky bc i KNEW anna was voting sharky but he bought her lies and i was convincing enough so i just feel its my fault i lost my closest ally (and his vote steal) although maybe he would have beat me in the end so this is good thing? nope! like i think i played alright in the middle but ppl prob wont respect it and idk if i would bc clearly im biased and maybe i am just a goat and thats why im still in like i rly tried to do sth this round but didnt i just ugh so demotivated hehe but maybe ill snap or sth insert positive uplifting quote here i just hope that i can turn this around and defeat anna and her pet shark. ALTHOUGH ITS LIKE WHERE THE BIG DOG PULLS ITS OWNER AND WALKS IT INSTEAD OF THE OTHER WAY AROUND. im so EMO (TION)

yesterday i was feeling a LOT of emotions and now that i have distanced myself i realize that my emotions were VALID and i am perfect and had the RIGHT to be upset that everything went wrong. i am speaking my immunity win into existence it WILL happen. i HAVE done the homework and even if i flop it (which i wont) i will still NOT GO HOME bc matt and maynor are hopefully on my side. OK BUT LIKE IM JUST SO JKAFSHKAJDSFHADSKFJA

This immunity is very important. We cant let Matt or Sharky win it. We need to have the opinion for them available to be voted out.

So like.... I am upset and feel very alone now in this game. Brian got rocked out and i was lied to again. I am just like so over it. I feel manipulated when I did have all the power and could've got a big threat out. but NO sharky and anna the fucking dynamic duo they are decided it would be fun to go to rocks! I am just so over it. Im getting fucking 5th place and I am MAD.

OR AM I? I decided to lie last night and say i gave my idol to brian last night. Why? It would paint an even bigger target on my back so i can go idoling. Cause of course I am not dumb enough to go and give my idol away hell naw. Instead, I need to knock sharky out of the immunity comp tonight but then get everyone on my case so they vote me. then boom idol. i know that this should get me to f3. I hope. If sharky goes next, and anna/maynor win FIC. then i know i can get at least maynor with me cause Bryce will then be the clear winner out of us 4. then maybe i will have a shot at the win but eh, need to get there first. I hope to god this can work and if not, final juror here i come!

I woke up feeling TERRIBLE. I feel so bad about the Brian situation. Matt won't respond because he probably hates me. I feel like a trash person. And tbh I'm questioning if I even deserve to be here.

I feel sick. Literally this is the worst case scenario. If anybody else had won everything would be fine. And now Matt has like given up which makes me even sadder. I'm honestly considering asking everybody to vote me out. So that Matt at least has a shot of making FTC. This sucks.

I WON IMMUNITY WOOOH IM SO ICONIC IM LITERALLY A LOSING FINALIST AND EVERYONE WANTS ME OUT I FEEL LIKE ILL LOSE IN THE END BUT THAT WONT STOP THESE PPL FROM GIVING ME 4TH WHEN I LOSE THE NEXT IMMUNITY AJKFDSHKFAJ THEYRE ALL LIKE SO VISIBLY DISAPPOINTED I WON IM SO SAD NNNN I WOULD BE HAPPY FOR THEM! i really hope they vote out sharky now bc its literally the smart move but im willing to bet theyll keep him to spite me annas gonna be like sharky needs to stay we get him out NEXT round and maynor might be convinced or sth idk and matt idk askdjfhdkjf i thought we were good but he ghosted me all day today so hm. club 96 nina and tina really falling apart

Matt is literally shutting down. Like I'm trying to talk with him and mend things and try to rally him so we can figure out how to keep us both safe and honestly he's just not interested. He seems disinterested and honestly he's being kind of a brat. Stop pouting! Sack up and help me fight. Because yes I was selfish last round and that put us in a tough spot but It was never my idea to trust Bryce or my idea to ignore that we had a vote steal to secure our vote at F6. I'm not the only one who made mistakes. So come on and let's freaking recover! Or are we just supposed to lay down and award Bryce the win? UGH

I was really on the brink of asking everybody to vote me out. But Matt is being so useless right now. If he's going to act like that he'll just get picked off at F4. He has no fight. So I'm over it. I really do love him but at this point I'm going to have to just try my best to get Annabelle and Maynor to believe that they stand the best chance at FTC against me, instead of Bryce or Matt. I've already ruined my reputation so I might as well at least try to fight. I feel over everything but I have to get it together.

The vote hopefully is between Matt and Sharky. I know Bryce really wants Sharky gone. Annabelle and I are talking and seeing which route is the best for us to make it to the end.

Like wow. My brain is so big. Im pretending that I threw away my idol to brian at the last second, and that I am leaving this round. Whereas in actually reality I still have my idol and sure as heck im playing it tonight and making final 4 YEET. like woe is me, woe is me, lol no bitch im here to stay. Sharky like, needs to leave as well. I love him but 2 big if a threat and I would quite like to well, win.

Oh and as I write this annabelle needs me huh. Well listen here, you lied to my fucking face and got brian out. Thus, you also need to leave bish. I am fed up of being lied 2 constantly by these fuckers called my tribemates and I am NOT here for it anymore. Time to play the lies and deceit game myself huh

This round is so weird for me. I felt like I was in such a tough place and feeling really defeated. But now Anna is getting paranoid and there is a very slim chance I could get her to to vote Maynor and then Matt and I both make F4. But my issues is I can't trust anybody. Because I don't think anybody trusts me. Like Maynor is being very noncommittal. Anna keeps flip flopping and maybe she'll flip onto me. Matt seems on board but honestly maybe he deeply deeply hates me and is just lying and will vote me out.

There is a little over an hour left before tribal. I'm convinced that it's me going home. Everyone seems to be too easy to agree to vote with me. It's not looking good.

Literally wtf. The Biggest plot twist of the century is occurring. I'M THE SWING VOTE?? Like since when in hell was I going to be the deciding factor. I mean I like it, I have the power for once and I am safe but still omg i LOVE IT! I am bunsen the Berner in this image, deciding between 2 fates: https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DzD8lXwUwAAgTlp?format=jpg&name=900x900

Having a panic attack. Im really nervous. Like i know its between Matt and Sharky. But there is still a chance that somehow me or annabell could still go. I hope it doesnt and its clear cut with Sharky and Matt. Fingers cross. Or imma die.

i had a good talk with anna today and i kind of love her (as long as she votes sharky) i think maynor might go now which is sad bc anna says matt/sharky are doing that but like matt says that he wants me maynor him f3 so who knows! anna like was honest with me about not knowing who to vote and seems to be voting sharky but literally anything can happen so whomst knows.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH okokok i feel so fucking badly about this move like so badly ughhhhhhhhhh but i feel like it has to happen i'm so so soooo sorry sharky like you have no idea i've been torn all day on what i should do and idk i feel like i lose no matter what this fucking blows

Sharky is voted out 4-1.

#episode #allmadhere

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tumblunni · 7 years

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Finally got back to finish Oneshot...

GAH

my emotions...

spoilers below

Okay I was spoiled beforehand, so i already knew the final choice is ‘save the world or save Niko’ from the point I set foot in the library. And I was very certain of my choice but the game still made me doubt it a hundred times over, DEAR GOD

Mostly the ‘reality game’ aspects of this thing have just been annoying to me. It gets in the way of the story a lot, and doesnt really... do anything? It feels like its ONLY there for the ‘wow how did they do that’ factor, I guess. But it just gets obnoxious and seriously its never actually made me ‘paranoid’ or anything, and if it DID then that isnt a good thing! I don’t get it... But yeah, its just mostly annoying having to search thru the game files every five seconds in order to solve the next puzzle, rather than it actually being IN THE GAME. And its annoying cos sometimes they don’t even TELL you that you need to look outside the game for the answer! There’s so much backtracking and pixel-hunting already, you didnt need to make me do it for no reason when you put the answer replacing my desktop all along, or whatever. And I just imagine how unplayable it would be for someone who’s computer isnt capable of doing all this stuff. like if they had an antivirus that blocks it, or a really old computer that lags out or crashes when it happens. Plus its SO STUPID that the ENTIRE POINT OF THE NAME OF THE GAME comes from a stupid trick it pulls on you in the ending. It tells you you only had one shot and you can’t play again, but then there ACTUALLY IS A NEW GAME PLUS and you CANT GET THE FULL ENDING WITHOUT IT. You HAVE to delete your save data from the files in order to PROGRESS THE GAME. I just... I just feel SO BAD for any players who go fooled by this or just didnt have enough meta sense to grasp some of these puzzles without a guide. Its like a ‘you must be this smart at random programming bullshit to progress’ barrier... So yeah this is the one game in all of time that I most reccommend using a guide for! I tried my best to do it without one but I missed a whole bunch of achievements and shit because of it. I guess at least that makes the newgame plus a little more fun, even if I’m still not exactly happy I have to do all these bullshit puzzles TWICE MORE to get the true ending... gahhhHHH

BUT

the ONE time the dumb meta puzzle bullshit was actually good and actually enhanced the story IS THE ENDING

The final puzzle has you running a second ‘decoder program’ from the game’s file directory (yeah, bullshit, IKR?) and it does actually have some creative puzzles of holding the image over the game window to reveal the right way to go. But more importantly, it does it in a very creative way! All the hints are pages torn from the Author’s journal, and you kinda have your first and last conversation with him via these. And he tells you about the sadistic choice you now have to make, and apologizes... :(

Also its very good meta that the Entity tries to interfere with you during this section. Usually there’s no damn reason for the stupid super hard meta puzzles, this time there IS a reason! In-universe, its supposed to be that the Entity has removed your ability to interact with the game normally, so you can ONLY solve this last puzzle by fiddling with the files. Its really really upsetting to see Niko being fooled by the Entity and there’s no way to talk to them, they think you left when its really some asshole depressed computer god that kicked you out! GAHHH!! But also i feel a lot of sympathy for the Entity cos the Author says they’re trying to destroy the world because they have no other way to kill themself. And the nature of the Entity is still left completely unexplained in this ending, which is why it SUCKS that the game tries to trick you into thinking there isnt a newgame plus! But it seems the entity might be like... an artificial god? With their powers they’re clearly more of a god than the player could ever be, but they talk like they’re one of the ‘tamed’ robots we’ve been seeing for the whole game. I’M REALLY REALLY CURIOUS ABOUT THIS TRUE ENDING, DAMMIT

Anyway... aaa... I picked to save the world instead of Niko. And I feel like COMPLETE SHIT! HOORAY! But like.. god.. I know that it would not be morally defensible to kill hundreds of strangers just to save one child I’ve grown to love so dearly. I’ve always got mad when characters in videogames choose to doom the world just to save their best friend, but this game really makes me feel just how hard that choice is to make! My only criticism is that maybe it wasnt as hard as it COULD have been, since you do meet a bunch of huggable characters throughout the game that you’ll love just as much as Niko. It was a decision that couldnt be made by any form of proper logic, so I just boiled it down to a stupid emotionless profit/loss analysis. I can cry over losing one person, or losing the dozens of others I also met, AND a whole world of strangers! Either way I cry equally as much! AAAARGH!! I JUST COULDNT STOP THINKING OF MR LAMPLIGHTER AND THE UNNAMED PANCAKE CAFE PERSON AND THE PROPHETBOT AND KIP AND SILVER AND THE BIRD FAMILY AND THE CAT HUGS ALLEYWAY ROBOT AND ALL THE OTHER CHARMING ROBOTS AND THE TINY LITTLE PHOSPHOR SHRIMP AND THE ROOMBA!!!!!!!!!! GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH But at least I was able to get some pancakes for Niko, and be honest with them about what was happening, and say goodbye. And at least in this ending nobody dies, its just that Niko can’t ever go home again so its equally as sad as if they died. And i can’t even talk to them ever again to comfort them!! GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH But like.. its mildly more optimistic than the alternative, I guess. Cos you get to see a montage of everyone else you ever met seeing the sun come back and crying. AND EVEN TINY BABY PLANT SPIRIT CAME BACK TO LIFE BECAUSE OF MY SIDEQUEST FINISHING POWERS I can feel like maybe Niko would be able to make a new life there, even if they’d always miss their momma and probably resent me for it... *sigh* its still better than 400+ other people not even getting the chance to make a new life, JUST so one mom and their kid can be happy but still it hurts dear god making the ‘right decision’ doesnt matter when it still hurts both decisions would be wrong to someone...

at least I didnt cry as much as I could have, cos I knew in advance that there’s a newgame plus and a true ending i dunno if the true ending is happier or sadder tho but DEAR GOD i would have been SO pissed off if i fell for the game’s stupid trick and never found the newgame plus and this was just THE END FOREVER fuk u developers u aint so clever *waving middle fingers as i descend into a quicksand of tears* god im not even emotionally okay enough to start playing again now i know i have to play two more times aaaaa and I have to see the other bad ending too aaaaaaaa and i have to walk through everywhere again now with the knowledge of how it ends AND the newgame plus has added dialogues and stuff just to rub it in aaaaaaaaaaa god i dont know whether to congratulate the developer or be REALLY ANGRY at them god just fuck me up AAAAAAAAAAA i am not a god, please stop giving me the responsibilities of a god please can anyone else decide who lives and dies please can niko hug their mom again without everyone else losing their moms in order to do it AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA this game.

#bunni plays oneshot #rip me #slain by credits sequence prophetbot #my first friend #you have all the world now #you can live outside your programming #you can see it all #*sniff*

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drstrangejuice · 5 years

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fat post about toy story 4 and MAH FEELS

OK, I came home today after seeing Toy Story 4 feeling all warm and fuzzy inside (it was kind of bittersweet, but still overall happy...) and came to tumblr seeking cute fanart, but damn y’all had to go and make me feel sad all over again... Woody leaving Buzz and the rest of his pals behind - yeah, O U C H, that did hurt a lot....but I for one was really happy to see him reunited with Bo. I think we can all agree he’s going to have a better life out of Bonnie’s closet for YEARS where she eventually would have put him and forgotten about him and - like Andy - probably have discovered him even more long years later only to go on to donate him to someone else. Alternatively, even worse, she could end up just throwing him away. Anyway, it’s pretty likely that a sad fate would have awaited him if he returned home in the RV. Yes, he would have been among his friends, but he would never have been able to play with them and Bonnie at the same time. Of course, this assumes that Bonnie would have continued to forget him and leave him behind in the closet. You never know, perhaps her interest in the cowboy could have returned, and things wouldn't have been so doom and gloom. Yet I think it’s safe to assume her interest in him was waning, and the sadder fate would have lain in wait for Woody. Instead, however, Woody decided to stay with Bo. Let’s ignore the emotional stuff for a sec about saying goodbye to Buzz and co. and just focus on how much of a nicer life this is for Woody, even if this means parting with his friends. He is free, he is going to live a life satisfying new children and enriching their lives! Also, he’s gonna live...in the wild...and just? gatecrash various playgrounds??? Yo, idk about you but I have never been to a playground with so many cool toys in it at once. If I was one of those kids who jumped off the bus and into that playground and discovered TOYS in it as well???? My mind would have been blown and I would have been having the time of my life. Anyway, so instead of wasting away in the closet, or in a box, or on a shelf, Playground Party City is Woody’s new life. Hell yeah??? Compare that to living your life IGNORED for YEARS and just having to be shut away in a closet or a box or somewhere similar miserable and lonely. Honestly, in a way Toy Story is a terrible franchise because as a kid it gave me horrible anxiety/sadness/grief/GUILT to imagine (or, maybe even partially believe...lol...) that my toys were actually alive and in reality I was sentencing them to a life of misery when I put them away in a box. L m a o. HOWEVER, Bonnie doesn’t live in a world where there’s a movie franchise that might give her the idea that her toys are FUCKING SENTIENT AND PERHAPS THEY HAVE FEELINGS TOO???!!!!?? In Bonnie’s world, that is an actual reality. Except she doesn’t know it, and never will. Toys ARE actually alive, but no one knows, and the toys do an incredible job of never being discovered........ok except for the emotional trauma they inflicted on the villain kid in the first movie but he’s probably gonna grow up banning that memory from his brain and if it ever surfaces he has to tell himself that it was a delusion or a nightmare so he can continue to function without being paranoid that inanimate objects actually are watching him AT ALL TIMES. Err, anyway, where was I going with this...OK so Woody’s new life. Yes, having to say goodbye to his friends was tough, but like Buzz said...Bonnie will be OK. Woody did his best to make sure Bonnie was alright, but he knows the rest of his pals are gonna continue to love her and be there for her, and it’s OK if he’s not a part of it. I mean, yes, it’s also gotta hurt on some level for him that - ouch - Bonnie doesn’t love me anymore, and that’s sad, but at the end of the day I did my job and I gave her plenty of happy memories and also she is happy without me. I know it hurts to be forgotten, but Bonnie doesn’t share that hurt or sadness, because she is just a little girl, and it is completely normal for her to change her mind about which toys are her favourite, which ones she wants to play with, which ones she’s most emotionally attached to. Woody was looking out for her emotional needs while also taking care of his own. It doesn’t matter if Bonnie loses me because she isn’t going to care (cough cough blunt but true). However, if Bonnie loses Forky she is going to be upset!!!! It’s kind of funny, but Woody was also the one that ultimately brought Forky to life. Woody recognised that she needed a friend at kindergarten -- he was looking out for her!!!!! He did a better fucking job of it than her goddamn teacher, mind you! Can we talk about what a crap teacher that was, by the way? ? “Aw hi sweaty, it’s ok come inside and put your backpack down, everything is gonna be just fine I promise (: (: (: “ *proceeds to completely ignore child that she just left alone and is now sitting at a massive table all by herself scared and anxious on her first day of school* I mean, god, pay attention and at least get her to come sit at the bigger table with more kids - make sure she has a buddy. MAKE SURE SHE EVEN HAS SOME GODDAMN CRAFT SUPPLIES.....YOU JUST INSTRUCTED THE CLASS TO START DOING CRAFT AND THEN DID NOTHING WHEN ONE OF THE CHILDREN WAS SITTING ALONE AT A TABLE AND SOME BLONDE FUCKO WITH AN APPLE WALTZES UP AND STEALS HER COLOURED PENCILS. OH AND ALSO SHE STARTED CRYING. WHAT THE HELL, PLEASE SOMEONE IN THE ROOM WHO ISN’T A TOY PLEASE PAY ATTENTION TO THIS POOR LITTLE GIRL OH MY GOD .......ok this post is going nowhere now, basically I just wanted to share a few thoughts and got kind of sidetracked without saying anything particularly meaningful. Basically, tl;dr I came into the tag expecting everyone to have enjoyed the movie but was surprised when it seems some of you didn’t. I agree, yes, it wasn’t as good as the third movie and probably didn’t need to be made, as the third movie had a happy, complete ending. I will also agree it was disappointing that the original gang got basically no screen-time. This was especially sad for Jessie, I thought. Even Buzz, too, despite the fact he did get decent-ish screen-time compared to the rest of the gang. At the end of the day, the movie made me happy because even as a kid I shipped Bo and Woody. They established in the very first movie that those two had a crush on each other, and I think they are very sweet and cute together. The other movies also established that Buzz had a crush on Jessie. At the moment I can’t quite recall if that was ever shown to be reciprocated because honestly I’m not sure Jessie ever even thinks about romance; ADVENTURE is definitely more of a priority and thing she would think about. Also, if Buzz ever flirted with her I’m pretty sure she would likely be oblivious, lol. Anyways, I also got a surprise when I came into the tag and found y’all shipping Woody and Buzz. Surprised, but also not surprised? I mean, I totally get it. However, I personally am just not gonna jump on that bandwagon because if you asked me what was going inside their plastic little heads I doubt either one would ever want to smooch the other. Yes, they are bros for life and their friendship is a beautiful wonderful thing that is a joy to watch in the other movies....however I can’t imagine that they wanna smooch. Anyway, I’m not sure how even Bo Peep is gonna be able to smooch Woody with that massive pointy nose of his, lmao! At the end of the movie when they were both staring lovingly into each others eyes I had to wonder “are the gonna kiss”. They didn’t, and that’s probably a good thing because it most likely would have looked awkward with Woody’s big nose in the way and also the fact that his head is like a billion times larger than Bo’s, lmao. ...that’s a weird sentence to end this post on, but I think I’m (almost) done now, lol. So, in conclusion, Toy Story 4 was an odd “conclusion” to the franchise. The third movie felt a lot more satisfying as a conclusion, and I guess I am kind of sad that #4 ended the way it did, separating Woody from his lifelong pals. However, if you consider how long certain pals have been in his life and how recent they were; Bo and Woody were a lot closer in their beginnings as toys for Andy and Molly, compared to Buzz and Jessie’s arrivals. Woody went on to have many years together with his new friends in these two - however somewhere along the way Bo was put in a box and taken away from him and everyone else she loved. The fact he got to see an old friend (and crush, heh) again and know that she had been getting by OK in the big bad world for the many years since they’d last seen each other......ugh!! MY HEART!!!!! Also, while staying with Bo meant betraying his loyalty to his owner, ultimately he knew that that was going to be OK because sometimes people simply just naturally grow apart (Bonnie and Woody), and that’s OK. And then sometimes even if it’s not a natural progression, sometimes you have to say goodbye and farewell to old friends if it means you’re making that decision to better your own life (Woody choosing life as a free toy rather than a toy banished to a closet). Ugh idk I guess I’m trying to find some meaning in the separation part, but at the end of the day I think all of the toys will be sad at Woody leaving, but they’ll know he’s happy and that even though he was leaving them he still loved them all and treasured his memories with them. It was both a sad and happy goodbye and..........and I’m crying again now, great. OK this post is officially over as I’m off to bed to go cry myself to sleep I guess lmfao

#ps I'm not ugly crying I'm just.......on the verge of shedding a lone tear....#I can probably suck this back into my eye juice if I blink enough and the blinking doesn't make the droplet fall down my face #lmao #toy story 4 #toy story #disney #LONG POST #i did proof read this post once and should probably do it again but i actually need to go to bed #it is 3 am what the fuck since when is it 3 am

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