#but even then its like rare chance

[thetimelordbatgirl]

Tfw your Transformers Prime Arcee and Airachnid figures are confirmed to be with the delivery company, Evri:

#i swear to god if they yeet my package over the alley way gate like they did that one time.... #like no joke expierences with evri have so far included #not finding our packages even at our door but outside the alley way gate where anyone could steal it #(thank fuck we have upstairs sometimes taking in our stuff if she finds it as she knocks on our door at times with our packages) #one time they somehow delivered my hocus pocus book to...another address #and sent a picture of...google maps as proof #thank fuck the people at that address proceeded to deliver the book to us #and like i just said #one time yeeted a package over the alley way gate #which you know good thing nothing breakable was in the damn package #only recently did we get a good delivery from them #but even then its like rare chance #so lord help me with them delivering my tfp figures...

[moeblob]

What if I straight up didn't explain myself? What if I just said trust me on this? Would you?

#fe warriors three hopes #mercedes von martritz #miklan anschutz gautier #we really only need to clarify this is STRICTLY warriors miklan and i think ive already condemned myself but i accept it #i am very sorry but the person i usually would talk to about rare pairs has been a bit busy so i couldnt go to them to get it out that way #so art is the only way i have you have to understand its not my fault (its my fault) #did you guys know i reset the azure gleam map three times before googling the chapter where he dies to try and save him #no i dont think he deserves to be pardoned for what hes done but i liked that w3h gave him a small chance to be better FOR HIMSELF #no i dont think he should simply be forgiven for everything he did but i do like that he was given humanity and how #he was still not a good guy but damn you guys i think about that npc sometimes #who says that they admired him becoming something despite being a criminal bc if miklan can do it whats stopping them from being better ? #like that npc stuck with me a while ok #just ......... there are a lot of thoughts here that i dont think many of you care to read even in tags so ill stop now #i will say the canvas is saved as speed run to cancellation lesgo

[nychthemeron-rants]

I am so close to making a Hazbin AU where Angel is Niffty's dad because making this post and THIS vvvv

Fucking image made the idea go from "huh, funny coincidence" to full on brainrot.

#Angel is Niffty's dad now #im sorry for already going off the deep end #but its happened #I know it has zero canonical backing besides the speculated birth/death dates of these two #but it would be cute #and kinda sad #but cute! #Angel Husk Niffty and fat nuggets forming a little family unit #eventually getting redeemed and getting to meet aunt Molly #for angst you could have Alastor using this to manipulate Angel similarly to how he fucked with Lucifer #except Alastor actually has been more present for Niffty than Angel #and the fucked up extra edge of him owning Niffty's soul #not to mention that Angel 100% has no fucking clue he ever had a kid #like he's gay #and died in the 1940's #sure he's slept with women a few times for various reasons #but that was rare since again he's got no interest in women #so the chance of him having an illegitimate child was never even a thought #besides sex education in the '30's and '40's wasn’t exactly stellar #finding out he's a dad would be a complete shock and probably cause him a whole breakdown #meanwhile Niffty would either not care or just be excited to finally meet her dad #hazbin angel dust #angel dust hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel angel dust #hazbin niffty #niffty hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel niffty

[creaturefeaster]

guy who's 5 minutes away from finding they've been bitten by a tick

#i had just happened to be taking selfies right before i went to like. #strip down and shave. and just by pure chance i found a tick on me #ive never had one. it was so small and recent it hadn't even begun feeding #i went to the ER to get it removed because i was afraid of its head ripping off or it vomming into the wound #and the medic still decapitated it on accident so 🫠 #and so then they had to surgically cut into the skin to remove the mandibles left behind #so that was my night tonight #soooo awsome #freaked me the fucketh out though lyme disease is so scary to think about #anyway i rarely post a selfie unprompted these days #and im not really even a fan of this pic im kinda tired and my hair is weird #but i thought it funny and appropriate to share

[end-orfino]

ahhhhhh i remember why i dont read comics & books and watch movies as much as I should. Because they make me lose it

#i get suddenly hit with a tsunami of inspiration and an urgency to Make Something #but the urgency isn't about the process of making it's about I Have Stories To Present Too. I have to See Them Realized. #and that hit of urgency is obviously far too short lived to make anything. esp since it comes in a set with a feeling of 'wow this- #-thing was so great' that transforms into intensified perfectionism of No No What Im Doing Here Isnt Good. What Is This. Disgrace- #-to my idea AND to what inspired it AND to my self proclaimed status as an amateur storyteller #which turns into artblock. so like low chances that ill even get a singular good drawing made during this #and the multiple comic or script or whatever ideas that appear in my head during this are out of the question entirely #oh and all of this appears next to the normal feelings caused by a good story like attachment to the characters and having to process it- #-for a while and if its very good then even sometimes rarely i get the need to make fanart #so all of this combined just leads to me not being able to do anything for a while and feeling awful about it. #fun./sar #i wish i was a normal artist people here are so resilient and do stuff even though they dont want to or they DO want to #because idk they enjoy being pissed bcs of a thing not turning out right and they dont mind how tedious it can get- #-and they enjoy sacrificing hours&days&months of their lives without a guarantee that anyone will appreciate it accordingly and itll pay of #its probably the resilience though #im weak like a dried twig both mentally and physically #this sounds like i never enjoyed drawing&writing ever. and to clarify thats far from true. i frequently enjoy it #just never frequently enough and consistently enough to actually make something more 'worthwhile' or linear #it's like a wind that comes & goes that i have no control over. #i try to keep telling myself that in the past i struggled to make anything 'bigger'....& know i even made animatic shitposts #this sounds so stupid god. an animatic shitpost being an achievement. #its not an art skill achievement its a fighting tooth and nail with my own self to actually finish it because its a struggle almost every- #-time achievement #what im saying is im trying to tell myself that i already improved. im doing more than i could have done in the past. #even if the process is so slow and i dont know when ill advance again #if ill advance again. i just gotta believe i guess? thank u parappa

[like-wuatafauq]

#like i think its sweet and romantic and like everyone would know im so loved and taken #i think its okay to show certain aspects of affection in public is that one okay or weird?? idk i rarely received affectionate #also not saying i have that on me now im just saying if in the future will asking a femme this get me laughed at or give a girl an ick :( #femme bait #femmes #lesbian #butch4femme #can femmes answer this plz thank u #i just tricked yall into calling me handsome sorry guys this is my chance to feel handsome even in rejection #any sapphics can answer this btw but i date femmes so thats why but yall all welcome to this poll:) #poll #sapphic poll #sapphic post #long tags #hey handsome #:) #hey beautiful #wlw #wlw post #wlw pining

[dravidious]

It's shit like this that stops me from playing magic more often

#why even bother playing when i'll just get rare-spammed into oblivion without any chance #i only get to have fun in limited and they put that behind a paywall for no reason #seriously why isn't phantom draft the default? realism? #though even draft games get ruined by rares #look at this fucking downside #“if you don't fulfill this extremely easy condition then you get a tiny slap on the wrist” #“you'll only deal 6 damage every 2 turns! unlike a normal 3-drop that deals 3 damage every 1 turn and dies to lightning strike!” #reminds me of the joke in the tf2 community of making stupidly busted weapons with the downside of “no random critical hits” #every rare is an overpowered piece of shit to some degree but only some are so simple and blatant about it like this one #meanwhile the 3-drops in my collection are like “3/2 with a small upside” #“4/3 that can't attack at all unless you buff its power” #this is why you never trust free-to-play games. they're never actually free

[todayisafridaynight]

thinkin bout 2019 sawashiro's outfit makes me laugh in a hypothetical sense cause alongside the leather gloves he has an alligator-print suit jacket and then under that's a snake-print vest and then under that's a leather dress shirt and so wouldnt it be right goofy if under that's a regular t-shirt and just to really hit the homerun on layers he can have a tanktop under that. for the giggles.

#snap chats #i have a comic drafted joking bout this and we know how i roll i generally dont make text posts related to drawings #but i feel lazy rn so idk if im gonna finish it #either way this still makes me chortle. like bitch this game takes place in spring/summer you must be MELTING #actual Dont Touch Me Im Sterile kind of behavior #cause i know sometimes blokes wear t-shirts under their dress shirts #i dont really do it since Its Hot As Is but on the rare chance its cold i do have an undershirt ready #the double-down on reptile print though like even his shoes are gator print. theyve been lke that since the 90's tho so nothin new #but my man why so much rough-exterior/uncomfortable via leather patterns get help

[moodr1ng]

omggg theres an actual death rock/post-punk band playing in my city next month.. like they actually make goth music. it is IMPOSSIBLE to find goth shows in this country let alone in my city im soooo into it!! and the venue is literally 2 streets away from my place this fucks so hard

#97 #im def going #gonna try and see if i can convince any friends.... #the issue is i dont have goth friends lol #maybe i can convince some ppl bc the rest of the show is all punk & oi! bands lol #i may suffer bc a lot of punk tends to be in the range of sounds that hurt me but well. #ill pack ear plugs lol #but anyway i gave the bands album a listen and genuinely their stuff is rly good. excited! #maybe i should try to dress more visibly goth or whatever so i have a chance at befriending local goths #theres gotta be some... at uni... right.. #tbh i think french goth is mostly dead lol. you cant even find online places let alone a local scene #and the few online spaces are all shared rock/metal/punk/goth #if theyre goth-only theyre dead w a handful of members who dont post #and they also like. ngl. seem to be populated by edgy noobs #there rarely seems to be much in terms of knowledge of the history of goth or even like..... a particular interest in the music #its moreso about the fashion as in uh. not really goth tbh. #you cant even rly find a french goth facebook group so like. yeah. it is dead as shit lol. #thats why i dont self-id as goth anymore. theres no point if theres no community yknow? and you dont dress in the fashion

[fungi-maestro]

The Question #8 (1987)

#book club #the question #vic sage #dc comics #comics #needle #needles #ask me if you need a new tag for that #anyway a rare moment of vulnerability from Vic at a time when he's completely convinced he's about to die #when i said that he has an obsession with second chances i seriously meant it #and again i think Spaulding is a fantastic antagonist. stories that make you wonder what 'doing good' means #and whether justification can come from motives #because objectively speaking its very bad to burn people or skin them alive. obviously very bad. #and yet hes doing so much good through his other actions that you have to stop and think about how people aren't just one thing #no one's a saint and no one is a devil. #to paraphrase vic himself later on: maybe there's not one good person in the whole world #Vic's been a real piece of shit. does all the good he's doing now atone for all of the horrible things he's done? #is atonement even Possible? #does it matter? #can we get that quote thats like 'I CARE IF I'M GOOD!' because i think it's fitting here #anyway on a lighter note i think the professor he mentions here could be Tot based on other clues he gives. #which would be kind of funny since tot clearly doesnt give a shit

[lesbicastagna]

such a hater lately but like i never see it pointed out or talked about and usually i'd assume it's because its obvious but i'm talking about berserk so im never sure. how fucking racist the whole kushan thing is. like not even questionable or bad taste like it's just straight up racism on every level of its execution.

#ive read actual medieval christian sources about saracens and its like straight up the same #too bad this isnt a 1500 biased racist islamophobic account of some monk?? like when i think about its crazy #its not salvageable. so many problematics~ facets of berserk are like at least compelling to me but this one is just crazy #its not only how a lot of the 'arabic' characters are designed like racist caricatures but even writing wise theyre one of the fews #recurring or important characters that arent given any sympathy or humanity. no chance for the reader to empathize. which is Super rare #for berserk even when it comes to villains. like its blatant esp with the emperor who isnt given any type of humanizing writing despite #being the main enemy of a whole arc and being at war with the worst white man in existence #a #ik hes downstairs. with all the due respect he just is

[killuaisaprincess]

Cinderella

THEY ARE CUTE!

Zushi has a crush.

On his best friend's brother, someone who was also his friend when they were younger…

It’s confusing. Learning Nen was much easier somehow…

He couldn’t ask master; it was much too embarrassing… and besides, he'd probably bring up some statistic that would make all of Zushi’s self-confidence plummet. He couldn’t ask master’s master; she was scary… Alluka is his best friend! Which makes it all the worse! But she had just teased him and told him probably way more info than Killua himself would ever want anyone to know… so now he feels a little guilty.

But that sad look in those deep blue eyes of his… it’s like an ocean of sadness, and Zushi wants to see a smile against those pretty features like when they were younger…

But he’s no good. He doesn’t know what to say or do… he’s definitely not Alluka, who was the only person who could bring her brother out of a melancholy state, and he’s not Gon…

Zushi doesn’t even know what happened… A-and he has no right to pry!

But he can’t think of what to do, so he’s sulking at the punch table, fiddling around with a glass in his hands.

Killua hadn’t danced with a single person tonight… s-so maybe!

Oh, come on… who’s he kidding… it took him years to conquer Heaven’s Arena; something like this seems…

Zushi sighs out loud vehemently, placing the drink down and playing with his champagne-colored bowtie, bright against the pure white of his suit.

He doesn’t know how to dance…

He’ll just stay glued here, in this spot, until the party is over, he decides; until he sees Killua slowly move away from the edge of the balcony, clearly intending to leave.

H-he’s got this!

༶•┈┈⛧┈♛ ♛┈⛧┈┈•༶

HE DOESN’T HAVE THIS!

He’s sweating buckets to the point he thinks his shoes must be flooding.

“O-OSU!”

He tugs at the edge of his tux, swallowing thickly.

It’s not hard to sweat just in the presence of Killua. He’s like from another dimension. The way the light pink dress he wears flows down, like a cascade of waves, highlighting his petite frame, his slender shoulders, the sleeves draping past them. His lips are the same complimentary pink, blushing his skin in spots as well.

Killua stops fiddling with his silver locks, his somber expression twisting for a second, something akin to joy, as he looks back.

“Osu. It’s been a while… you’ve gotten strong, huh?”

There’s a small catlike grin on his face for a moment.

S-strong? Oh, right!

Zushi steps forward, standing next to Killua, rigid as a board.

“Osu! B-but I’m still nothing compared to you two!”

Wrong move.

Killua’s expression crumbles so fast, Zushi wishes he could stuff the words back in his mouth. Killua physically recoils and draws closer to himself, wrapping his arms around his stomach.

“I can’t speak for Gon… but you’re definitely stronger than me now… you train with Alluka, right? She’s gotten strong too. She can take care of herself… so I don’t really train anymore. I don’t like fighting…”

It had always been a necessity, not fun. There was only a short time it was fun for Killua…

Tears fall hot on his cheeks before he can stop them, and he wipes them away, smiling bitterly. He wants to stop them. But they don’t…

Killua dips to the floor, trying to hide, sniffing.

Oh no.

Zushi wants to disappear. His heart aches, and he looks around desperately.

Alluka!

He can’t help Killua… he wants to. But what can he do…?

Confidence! Master’s master said it is the most important thing!

He leans over slowly, gently placing a hand on Killua’s shoulder.

“Killua?”

Killua looks up, tears still pooling in his eyes, and Zushi fumbles in his pocket, pulling something out and holding it outward for Killua.

Except it’s not a handkerchief. It’s his patchwork coin purse, and nervously he draws it back, fumbling to tug out the small piece of fabric and handing it to Killua.

“U-Um! Killua-san! S-someone as pretty as you shouldn’t cry!”

Zushi hears a small gasp out of Killua’s lips, and the red around his nose turns an even deeper hue, and Zushi isn’t sure whose face is more red, feeling his own on fire, still awkwardly holding the handkerchief out, and you can hear a pin drop.

Killua gently takes the handkerchief from Zushi’s hand, his small and slender fingers brushing against Zushi’s own, and his heart swells again, and Zushi swallows, trying to keep his heart from leaving. Killua��s pretty… and cute…

Killua says he doesn’t fight anymore, but Zushi knows Killua is still strong, but he can’t help but feel the urge rise in his chest to protect him.

“U-uh! I know you don’t fight anymore, b-but! If you want to, I mean! I’d really like if you came and watched a match of mine, osu!”

“Eh?”

Killua says it so softly he almost doesn’t hear it, and his head feels like it’s swirling as he looks up; Killua gently wipes under his nose using the handkerchief before placing it in his lap. His face is still cutely red, and he looks to the side, brushing a strand of hair behind his ear.

“W-well Alluka has a match… that-that day, b-but! I guess I could see how strong you’ve gotten…”

Killua looks over, smiling softly, adding.

“Osu!”

#;windy’s stuff #hxh #killua #hunter x hunter #killua zoldyck #Zushi hxh #Zukini #ZERO FUCKS TO GIVE THE TAGS WILL ENJOY MY RARE PAIR CRACKSHIP #In actuality I expect either nothing or hate but 😤 THEY ARE CUTE I DO WHAT I WANT AS QUINA WOULD SAY #GK always number one in my heartbut I’ve had this rare pair for two years now #JUST LET THE CURIOSITY DRAW YOU INNN COME ON JOIN THE DARK SIDE I HAVE COOKIES #Actually it’s wholesome 🥺 #ZUKINI OSU! 😤🥺 #Zushi x Ki ZuKini CUTE RIGHT CAME UP WITH IT MYSELF! Another fun thing about ships that don’t exist! #KI IS A PRINCESS 🥺🤧😤😤😤 Ki in dresses 🤲👌👌👌🎀 #C-CUTE #Ki is 22 and Zushi is 21 in this! I’m assuming Zush is the same age as Alluka! #I actually really find their dynamic cute 🥺🙏🤧 #🥺🤲 Ki is t-tiny and fluffy and cute 🥺🙏🤲🤧 KI IS ALWAYS TINY AND PRINCESS 🥺 #My Ki is always 5’3/5’4 in aged up aus and Gon is 6’6 AND IM LOVE THAT BIG GON AND TINY KI! #BUT KI IS TINY AND PRINCESS even when he’s about the same height as Zushi 🥺🙏 #THERYE REALLY CUTE GIVE THEM A CHANCE 🥺🤲 #ITS SUCH A DIF DYNAMIC THAN IM USED TO BUT I LOVE ZUKINI (and I love that ship name I came up with 🥺) #Zushi is a shy nervous bug and Ki is a cute shy BABEY 🥺🥺🥺🥺🤲🤲🤲😭😭😭 ZUSHI WOULD TREAT KI LIKE THE PRINCESS HE IS OK #Ki is so cute 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🤧🤧🤧 MY HEART CANNOT GO ON THEY ARE REALLY CUTE OKAY! OMG MY HEART AHHHHHHHH #KI TUCKING HIS HAIR BEHIND HIS EAR SHYLY IS SMTH I LIVE FORRRRRRR 😤 HES SO CUTE #ACTUALLY LOVED THIS IM GONNA CRY ITS SO CUTE #ZUSHI IS JUST EVERYONE WHO DOESNT LOVE KI AND WANT HIM TO BE PROTECTED AND LOVED AND THINK HES CUTE! KI IS BABEY 🥺🥺🥺🥺🤲🤲🤲😭😭😭😭🤧🤧🤧🤧 #BEST THING ABOUT NOT EXISTING! Slight fear everyone would leave until I realize there really aren’t that many people to leave and even if #I do end up alone! I will not stop writing and making edits 😤

[astrxealis]

damn i never thought i'd get into stardew valley this much but here we are !! makes perfect sense tho

#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚ #heyy this adds to my roster of games that actually have Evidence #gotta play more soulsborne legitimately soon so i have more evidence of my range LMFAO ... #i love how my. taste in games is really broad tbh! i'm willing to try anything out but i do uhh am less inclined to the more popular ones? #unless i get into them by way of. personal. or without outside influence #but if there's a certain something that makes me dislike a media yeah ... i do end up more indifferent tho. ultimately #i think sdv is another huge example of how me and lune really go all in when getting into smth #like terraria. but we end up forgetting about it pretty soon after. oops! #it depends tbh on how bored we are? how much we have to do. so yeah #xiv was That for a very long time bcs we didn't really have anything else uhh insert hashtag xiv was there for us when nobody was #aaa so thankful to xiv fr. idk. i think about what it has done for me sometimes and i get really emotional! #also funny how things connect. i got back into tumblr bcs of jjk and then connected w others mostly thru gi. and then twt thru a friend i #met thru a school event wholy thru chance. who got me back into twt where i connected with others thru ff(xiv) #and i find it fascinating how people make friends irl! i think its easy for me to feel that way 1. its just who i am lol its in my nature #2. im more of a bystander so. yeah. ez for me to study people and people-watch. idm that much tbh #it's funny... hmm interesting? a bit sad too. wnvr i want to. Take A Step Further. i end up not caring anymore LMFAOOO but tbh it's really #nice in the long run! my outlook on life is pretty weird tbh like uhh... idk. hard to explain. complex #whenever i face a problem i'm. absolutely confident i'll get over it. and unfortunately i feel like that... sense of confidence is rather ra #rare*? idk. and the fact i've always known (always!) i'd love myself no matter what. even if sometimes i would be really insecure. i never #truly hated myself and i sincerely doubt i ever will. but the fact i often suceed and rise from my failures that sometimes they don't feel #like failures doesn't mean that uhh i'll end up facing my downfall through. naive confidence? i try to be self-aware and do my best for no #regrets and it's fascinating how my values in life are shaped by my past. not just me. everyone. damn. i think the formative years of a #person are so goddamn fascinating and also i'm still unsure what i want for college but it's already fucking march HELP #anyway wow. i dont want to be too harsh on myself if the What If bad scenario/s end up happening but i'll really try my best #my aunts on my dad side both got into up diliman and i'll be damned if i don't. i know i can do it. i just gotta put in a ton of effort. #okay rambles bye bye #also i've been staying up until 3/4 ever since break LMFAOOO SDV HAS RUINED ME dw i'll be good again next week lmfao

[nandermoenthusiast]

Tag game time!!

I was tagged by @padmedala ty queen this looks so fun!!!

rules: create a picrew and take this quiz on how fandom would see you if you were a fictional character

that quiz really read me for filth it really said i can tell youre a libra from a mile away boo also i love that reddit keeps a safe distance i literally could not have gotten a better result calls me hot queer flirty and beloved by tumblr <3

imma tag some ppl for the first time in forever bc (if you read my tags youll know why) i have more time than usual on my hands lately sigh: @notyourdaisybuchanan @ivenothingtosaybutillsayitanyway @ta0xu @jennybeantime but honestly, anyone who sees this pls do this if you want; and if i tag you of course you dont have to do it!

#this was so fun to makeee #thank you so much fr! i had the worst month you guys.. i had a flu and then my immune system fucked up and i was hospitalized for a week bc #of this super rare autoimmune disease where my white cells attack my nerves...... it was bad i couldnt walk #i had no balance at all and felt like fainting every time i stood and my vision was all blurry... now i got home from the hospital and #surprise. i got covid in the hospital. because of course. and saturday its my birthday. and im so mad #im so so mad!!! my 30th bday happens by chance on a saturday and i have been sick all month and maybe i wont even be able to #celebrate bc now i have stupid fucking covid on top of everything! and ugh i dont even have a fever its literally just a few sneezes #i really hope i test negative by friday #smh #anyway this was so fun and it got my mind off things for a few minutes (i cried like a baby when i tested positive at home lmao) #so im gonna tag some people for the first time in forever lmao #tumblr pals #me #tests #tagged

[phantomrose96]

Thinking about Edward Elric as the Amestrian Military's specialest little unfireable boy

State alchemists can be fired for underperforming. We know this up front from the likes of Shou Tucker. And this makes a ton of sense from the homunculi's standpoint since the state alchemists are sacrifice candidates, and the homunculi would want to cull the weakest candidates and focus only on cultivating the strongest ones who stand the best chance of opening the portal.

........Then there's Edward. Who's already opened the portal.

There's no need to cultivate him. No gamble taken on whether he's good enough to open the portal. He passed the final test already. Graduated 4 semesters early.

And as such, has a free pass to do Absolute Fuck All.

And I'm imagining how funny this is from like an outside perspective.

Some newish state alchemist who'd only ever read up on the stories of Edward Elric, ready and excited to start their career of being paid handsomely with endless freedom to research and travel and do anything they want in the pursuit of science... surprised and confused to find themselves put on probation their first month for things like "ignoring orders." Which is, as best they had thought, a famous Edward Elric pastime.

Roy showing a slight bit of stress about his yearly state alchemist report, and Ed just snorting and rolling his eyes at Roy because every year HE just hastily does his on the train ride over (canon in the manga, a travesty it was left out of the anime) and it gets rubber stamped. Ed not realizing that other alchemists' reports get genuinely scrutinized and torn apart while Ed is free to turn in whatever absolute bullshit he thinks of 36 hours ahead of time. One year his report was about whether alchemy could be done via dance (conclusion: no it can't) and no one cared. Roy WANTS to tell Ed there's some kind of unknown favoritism around Ed making him literally bullet-proof but Roy has no way to phrase this that doesn't sound like he's just in denial and mad at how good Ed's train-reports are.

Guy from the Internal Amestrian Affairs sector who's responsible for auditing other internal military personel for any suspicious activity hitting about 1 million red flags for Edward Elric, issuing a STRONG and URGENT recommendation to suspend the alchemist pending further investigation into things like "literal bunk-buddies with two members of the Xingese royalty (enemy nation)" and "spent $10,000,000 of his stipend on a librarian to make her re-copy (what he seemed to interpret as?) military records in some extremely transparent effort to unearth state secrets (it was a recipe book but he was literally asking her about state secrets)" and "literally has never once obeyed an order, ever, not even once in his career, and is on public record having said 'I do not care about the goals and protections of the Amestrian Military. I am in fact only pursuing my own interests several of which are diametrically opposed to the safety and well-being of the governing body of Amestris'"

The issued recommendation is intercepted before it even reaches its intended desk. President Bradley himself has taken issue with it and denies it before a single set of eyes has seen it. The President's veto stamp is a terrifying hammer, used rarely, and it is now sitting on the auditor's desk.

The auditor sleeps with one eye open from then on out.

#fma #fullmetal alchemist #fullmetal alchemist: brotherhood #fma:b #literally anything about the dynamic between edward and the amestrian government is so so so funny to me #im begging you to come pick up your alchemist he keeps committing treason #Roy: absolute perfect ass-kisser and career-man playing the part 24/7 to disguise his treasonous ambitions and still #not flying under the radar #Edward on his public Twitter: bored. might tear down the Amestrian government for fun.

[shock]

i want to hold my tongue and not share the depth of my opinions about the two-headed cow but it upsets me so much every time i see it, i really do hate the narrative of 'rooting for' an animal like this to live despite it being unable (and will be unable, for its entire life) to do the most basic of things life has to offer, even breathing, eating, moving, to prioritize the savior myth that everything can and should be saved, that every living creature should be treated this way as though its not one of the greatest mercies that we as humans have the ability to enact a quick and painless alternative to a slow and miserable life that ends in slow and miserable death on our livestock when they can't advocate for themselves, the ability we have as humans to see the research and make a prognosis and decide that the spectacle is not worth the extended misery, but this life is worth the dignity of a peaceful death we have the capacity to grant

because there is a difference between helping a baby animal in the first legs of life knowing it has a chance to have a quality of life worth fighting for, not a life doomed to be painful that we KNOW is painful knowing all that we know about animals who come with this specific type of physical abnormality, what we see on the surface is only a fraction of much more malformation and deterioration on the inside that we can't just decide is not happening because they 'look' fine, and what we see on the surface is already a life from start to finish without any experience an animal like this should have by virtue of being alive, with no life at all and no understanding of why it is going through this

the assumption that there is no suffering despite eating, breathing, moving never something that this baby will be able to do unassisted, despite knowing the longest a two-headed cow has ever survived was not even a year and a half and that record hasn't been broken in over thirty years, that's not even a quarter, an 8th, a 12th, a 15th of a cow's normal lifespan, and doubtfully much of that was pleasant or comfortable, and even if this cow does get to the point of being able to stand on its own, we can't ever know the full range of agony this animal is going through, all we know is there is and there will be agony, and we need to not see life as inherently successful or painless just because something is going in one end and coming out the other, that isn't what defines an animal's quality of life to me

the two-headed calf poem is beautiful to me because it's a miracle that something so rare (luckily) and so doomed could see one extraordinary thing before passing. the sky ceases to be beautiful when forced to live every day for the sake of social media's voyeurism, it makes me so sad that someone who raises livestock would put public attention over their duty to their animals ☹️