#but handle with care mostly bc its in pieces and

[ma1dita]

do we have any sick!trouble and luke taking care of everything for her??(including her hehe🤭) if not then i’d like to think she would probably try to push herself through the day making sure camp doesn’t get set on fire bc older sister core! + dionysus probably dgaf 🤷🏻‍♀️ and maybe only luke noticing that she’s breaking out in a cold sweat and her movements a little more sluggish than usual but shes stubborn af so she refuses to rest

🐥

also ur works are crushing me jo they’re soo good😭💗

🐥🐥🐥🐥🐥

luke castellan x dionysus!reader

a/n: no trouble tags fuck it we ball! no edits either lmfao fluff :) can be a standalone just know reader is camp mom and Luke calls her trouble/slight cabin 12 mentions but not important (partners in crime series if you wanna check it out)

wc: 860

Luke doesn’t think he’s ever seen you be quiet.

Your voice is synonymous with the harmony of Camp Half-Blood in all of its forms: early morning announcements over the loudspeaker that serve as a wake-up call for campers to be ready for cabin inspections, hollow outcries to keep certain deviants in line (the Stolls and your brothers are a deadly force to be reckoned with), comforting words like kisses for scraped knees for the little ones, down to the gentle blanket of your singing at lights out. Luke also just knows by now that you love to have the last word—gods forbid someone else beat you at something you’re good at. Words always come easy when it comes to you (abilities of sons of Hermes aside) he finds out—but he can’t think of what can convince you to go back to bed today, especially with a temperature of 100.7 F.

He’s been circling you like a hawk this whole morning, not chastising (because clogged sinuses and all you’d probably fight him to your last breath), but rather helping out where he can. He swiftly double-checks counselor assignments once your puffy eyes leave the page, steers you away from walking straight into the fires of the forge instead of the exit at the armory, and waves off any bystanders who dare to get caught in the crosshairs of your bullheadedness.

In times like these, Luke’s almost grateful to be his father’s son (still a hard no, but you get the point). Doing these tasks undetected and mostly through a sleight of hand is better than worrying you even if he’s already at his wit's end; you’re quick in your own right too, body and brain separated today yet working on autopilot through a foggy sick-riddled mind. He hates leaving you like this even for a moment despite your protests of being able to handle yourself, but the two of you are spread thin today with all the work to do.

Luke finds you later after his workshop with your head against the cool stone of the climbing wall. You sniff into your sleeve, a wet sound stifled by the worn-down orange uniform you all wear, though yours looks as exhausted as you are, eyes closed and motionless even with lava slowly trickling from the top.

“Trouble? Are you okay babe? Grover fell off the wall already, you should… restart the mechanism,” he mutters, a big hand clasping at the nape of your neck like someone grabbing a kitten by its scruff.

“He’ll be fine, he’s a big boy,” you mumble with your face still attached to the rocks. “I’ve seen him climb over the Ares table for the last donut at lunchtime, molten lava and boulders should be a piece of cake.”

“At least cake is less painful and more delicious,” the satyr groans, hairs singed down to his hooves. Luke sighs, helping Grover back onto his feet for a well-deserved break.

“Babe…If you don’t move, sooner or later the lava’s gonna smother you.”

He shakes your arm since the controls are wedged between your body and the wall but it’s as if your body is bolted to the floor. A dissonant noise crawls out of your throat, “Dunno, kinda sounds nice. Maybe it’ll clear my sinuses.”

“Maybe it’s time to admit you’re sick.”

Even if he can’t see your face he knows there’s a scowl carved across it, “M’not sick. Just some allergies. I don’t get sick, Lu. Being sick is for the weak!” Lava continues to slide down the wall like molasses, inching you closer to a fate of fire— and your boyfriend watches you try to welcome it with weary arms.

“If you’re not sick, then I’m the best singer at Camp Half-Blood,” Luke drones as he crosses his arms. He can hear Percy laugh from the sidelines at that, silenced quickly by a glare.

“Now that would really clear her sinuses—even better if he dresses up for Theatrics again,” the son of Poseidon sniggers until a stray boulder comes barrelling towards where he and Grover are sitting. Everything’s suddenly less funny.

“It was one time, Jackson, and I wasn’t…” Luke sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose, “Trouble was just mending a costume.”

“It’s okay Luke, not everyone can pull off a corset.”

“Grover, another word out of you man and I’ll make sure your legs are permanently hairless,” Luke grits, finally tired of the chit-chat and more focused on getting you to rest. In one quick movement, he sweeps you off your feet and over his shoulder while his other hand slams on the button to reset the gears of the climbing wall. A delayed reaction falters from your throat, something of a yelp and an exhale.

“Luke! Put me down!”

But he’s already off in the direction of Cabin 12 to get you settled under the covers for at least the rest of the day until you’re up and kicking again. Your protests are scratchy but loud as he takes you away from the two kids and it's as if everything is right in the world again.

“Remind me not to get a girlfriend that stubborn one day,” Percy mumbles, bumping shoulders with his best friend.

#jo's 23rd birthday bash ⋆｡°✩ #trouble!verse #luke castellan x reader #luke castellan x dionysus!reader #percy jackon and the olympians #luke castellan fluff #made by ma1dita ♥︎

[yardsards]

This is why I refuse to watch/read delicious in dungeon. The entire thing gives me fatphobic vibes.

see the premise as a whole is actually very body positive (i myself had similar worries that a story about eating "healthy" would rely on fatphobic ideas of "healthy", but was pleasantly surprised). like, its approach to "healthy" is "make sure you're eating enough of everything so that your body has enough fuel. make sure you're resting enough and not overworking." rather than "you must not eat The Bad Junk Food." (like, there's one part early on where they're like "oh, we've eaten too much vegetables and lean meat, we need to eat more fat" so they search for fatty meat and eggs. and then later they eat deep fried food and no one is ever like "oh no, this is too fattening" they're just like "wow this is great it's so crispy and tasty")

and the core message of it all is just like "your body is a part of you, and is the part of you that allows you to do things and reach your goals. don't treat it like a burden or an afterthought." and the series has had a positive impact on the way i view and treat my body

and overall, it's better than a lot of other popular anime series in terms of representing realistic and diverse body types. our two human (or "tallman" as they're called in-universe) main characters, laios and falin, are not super skinny, with no wasp waist or shrink-wrapped abs. i would not consider either of them fat in canon, but they're still fatter than your average popular anime character. certain races like dwarves and orcs are just naturally stout, and are never treated as being unhealthy or unattractive because of their weight. fatness is said to be a respected trait among adventurers, as a sign that you're good at survival and can safely recover from injuries.

however. the show has a few small things that make me raise my eyebrows. one or two iffy offhand comments (glaring at you, That One Conversation about laios's hunger near the end) that in most media i'd just be like "sighhh, normalized societal fatphobia strikes again, as expected." but for this series it's like "god damn it, i expected better from you."

and some things about how body types between fantasy races are handled leaves something to be desired for me. like yeah dwarves are all stocky, but also elves are all slender. it makes sense for the different fantasy races to have different *average* body types, but i wish we got to see more variation from those averages between individuals.

(also, i can fully understand praising laios and falin's canon body types! even medium body types are underrepresented in most media and it's good to see more of them! but calling them *fat* representation just feels inaccurate to me)

it's just like. dungeon meshi is GOOD in terms of body positivity and representation, but it's not PERFECT.

like, i love this show/manga (if you couldn't tell from the content of my blog)

mostly i voice my complaints bc like. i'm tired of tumblr getting it's hands on a piece of media that is good and generally progressive and acting like the media is *perfect*. and then proceeding to treat anyone who points out things the media could have done better as if they personally slayed your firstborn. (and then, months later, after the hype dies down, realize that some of that criticism was actually very valid, and then violently knock the piece of media down from its pedestal. and act like everyone involved in the media's creation are irredeemable scum and that anyone who still likes it should be ashamed)

so yeah, funny dungeon show good, and i strongly recommend it if you like fantasy stories and food and worldbuilding, just don't expect it to be a flawless paragon of representation and fat positivity

(also take everything i say here with a grain of salt bc i myself am thin, i just care a lot about representation in media and body acceptance and dismantling fatphobia)

#eliot posts #dunme #dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon

[larkspyrr]

chapter viii — deeper than the truth (wc. 4.1k)

prev — masterlist / ao3 — next

reblogs are appreciated!

NOTE: i made some changes to the last chapter bc im fickle and didn't like it lmfao. you can either reread for the new context or check the tldr i posted on ao3

You had been right about one thing — Wriothesley was not a stupid man.

He was not unaware of himself. It was this self-awareness that had been key to Wriothesley's ascent from the very bottom to the slightly-less-so — to making the most of his station, regardless of whatever Celestia-forsaken obstacles had been thrown into his path. That, and his dogged determination to get there, at any cost, even if he had to fight tooth and nail.

And, by the Archons, he was going to fight now.

He understood precisely what it was that propelled him forward as he rose to the overworld the morning after you left, fast enough that one might think the Abyss itself nipped at his ankles like an angry hound, snarling, snapping. He’d known for a while the name of the beast that curled around his ribs and squeezed , even if he hadn’t been brave enough to yet speak it aloud. He was afraid that to utter it would be to invite it in closer, ever closer, leaving no room in his chest even for breath, for the frantic thundering of his heart. No room for the inevitable break once your arrangement came to its conclusion and you went on toward your future and Wriothesley stayed exactly where he had been all along, fractured but trying to mend.

Maybe he should have named it. Maybe then you wouldn’t have walked away.

He’d known there was nothing more for him to do when you left; that to follow you out would only push you away further. So he had stayed, and plotted out the next course of action he would take, so long as he was able to bide his time until the morning—if what he'd gathered from vague correspondences in Paquette's office was correct.

Paquette was clever, that much could be said. He'd covered his tracks with an almost masterful finesse and it had been a challenge to glean so much as a date from what seemed like mostly mundane communications with Thibeault.

He was good, sure. But Wriothesley was better.

After you’d left, Wriothesley had waited, sleepless, and then allowed himself no more than the time required to dress and make the Fortress’ arrangements for the day before he fled his quarters, not even sparing the bronze doors to his office a passing thought as he blew by.

Wriothesley had never been one to stand down from a challenge, not even those who crash-landed into his life bedecked in pearls and lace and more spirit than he knew what to do with; witty, and kind, and dutiful to a fault; a fallen meteorite from somewhere else, somewhere more.

And Wriothesley would sooner dive into the Primordial Sea and become no more than a ripple in cold waters than let you march to your death. Before he allowed you to throw away your life for the sake of the people you cared about.

Before he let you go.

So he ran, and the hounds howled in his wake.

When he arrived at the stables, half-wild, muscles screaming, his heart nearly stopped its thrumming at the same moment his purposeful strides came to a halt. The sun hadn't even fully risen.

Lucy’s stall was already empty, neither the mare nor her rider anywhere to be seen.

“So she’s accepted the job?” asked Thibeault, bony fingers curling delicately around the handle of the fine china teacup he held — an imported piece from Liyue, hand-painted, and worth more than most of the working class in the Court of Fontaine would see in a year. Thibeault’s mouth was as straight a line as it ever was, but his eyes glittered with something that looked dangerously akin to delight.

As close to delight as a miserable bastard like Thibeault could achieve, as it were.

Paquette, by contrast, smiled; a luxury he didn’t often allow himself, as frugal and dignified a man as he was, but he postulated he could spare himself a moment of frivolity on the eve of his triumph without too great an impact on the perception of his unblemished decorum. A smile would not be remiss, not amidst the host of more secular pleasures he wreathed his lifestyle in; though if you asked Paquette, and you should, they were simply par for the course for a man of his rank, so long as his taste remained staunchly on the side of ‘classy’ and gave a wide berth to the realm of ‘gaudy’, a feat he was loathe to say still escaped some of the peerage—present company very much withstanding, he noted, observing the garish hue of magenta in the tie his companion donned, not an ounce of shame in sight.

Dreadful.

Paquette tutted quietly, sipping his own tea. A custom blend, catered to his very specific needs and preferences. He swallowed thickly. He’d send this one back, as he had the others.

They still hadn’t gotten it right. Clearly, they hadn’t heeded his generous advice that the best mint was grown on Kannazuka Island.

“But of course she did,” Paquette said, placing his cup down on the tea table between the gentlemen. “As I told you she would, my friend.”

Paquette fought back a sneer at the word on his mouth; a cheap lie, but one he had to maintain if he wanted to remain on good terms with the sniveling man across him. They didn’t need to like each other, per se, in order to work together toward a common goal, but he supposed their machinations were easier to architect if there was some degree of civility between them. It would make it much easier to coexist while they awaited their vision coming to fruition.

A vision so very in reach now. Paquette looked quite forward to the privilege of dispensing with the pleasantries and he imagined Thibeault felt much the same.

While Paquette had certainly become adept at maneuvering around the other members of the court over the decades, he certainly hadn’t grown to like it any more than he had at the start. Especially that old bat Vellerot, a man (loosely called) made of little more than wealth and rot.

All in good time.

Thibeault leaned back in his chair, folding two withered hands in front of his stomach, a self-satisfied gesture that might have been reminiscent of a well-fed house cat if he weren’t so serpentine. His lips curled, teeth bared, and Paquette started; it was a gesture far too vicious to ever be considered a proper smile, though it was an effort nonetheless, even if it was as tasteless as the rest of him. “Once she’s little more than a smear in the woods, the rest will become much simpler,” he mused, drumming his fingers against his abdomen, a rhythmic tap-tap-tap that made Paquette wonder if it was an unconscious gesture. An appalling lack of composure. “The old man hasn’t paid attention to the world beyond his cups in nigh on a decade, and the two younger ones haven’t got the intelligence nor the fortitude to accomplish anything at all. She would be the problem. One terrible accident and she’s gone. Then the old man drowns in his cups from ‘grief', at least as far as anyone is concerned.”

Paquette hummed. “It also takes that delinquent whelp out of the equation, what with all the sniffing around he’s been doing. He will be utterly shattered at the loss of his love, I’m sure. Might do something reckless.”

“I still can’t believe our luck on that front,” said Thibeault. “Two birds, one stone, as the commoners are known to say.”

“Tale as old as time,” agreed Paquette.

Thibeault grimaced again in that way which was so unlike a smile. Paquette fought against his every instinct telling him to pull back from the frankly upsetting expression.

“The Viscountcy has been wasted on him for far too long,” said Thibeault, and he sipped his tea.

Neuvillette stood at the edge of the bridge, his hands folded primly behind his back, chin tilted towards the rolling sea.

Wriothesley heaved a breath as he approached and the man turned his face towards him.

“Neuvillette.”

“Wriothesley,” said the other man, eyebrows rising ever-so-faintly in surprise and interest. “I wasn’t expecting you. You look flushed.”

“Went for a run,” Wriothesley panted. “Can I have a word?”

Something flickered in his eyes, but Neuvillette merely gestured his chin towards the Opera without a moment’s hesitation and made his way towards the structure. Wriothesley fell into step behind him easily, fighting every cell of his being that was telling him to rush the other man, to urge him to walk faster, Archons damn it all.

He bit his tongue, yet it seemed Neuvillette sensed Wriothesley’s urgency and picked up his pace nonetheless.

Finally, after an eternity and then some, they settled into Neuvillette’s office at the Epiclese; a smaller rendition of his office at the Palais, though no less elegant and organized. It was a bright space, walled in books and ornate masonry, bathed in the light that sparkled off the water just beyond the stained glass windows. It smelled like the sea and romaritimes; a light fragrance that Wriothesley had come to associate with the Iudex over many years of knowing him.

Neuvillette looked over at him from behind his desk, his face kind but eerily calm, a direct juxtaposition to Wriothesley’s own storming, blazing heart.

Wriothesley inhaled. Exhaled. “I’m sorry to impose but this is an emergency.”

“It’s no imposition,” Neuvillette said. “I am at your disposal.”

Wriothesley held the other man’s gaze. “Which Melusine Marechaussee Phantoms are off-duty today?”

You clicked your tongue and pulled, bringing Lucy to a halt just before the clearing Paquette had described came into view. You dismounted her, quickly hitching her to a nearby tree, tucked safely behind a dense thicket. She looked at you, ears pitched forward, eyes restless. You moved to pat her gently on the nose, but she tossed her head away from your touch. You frowned, letting your hand drop back to your side.

The last time she had rebuffed you like that, there had been a hilichurl hiding in a nearby tree.

You would be on your guard. This time, you had the element of surprise on your side.

You tried again, satisfied when Lucy allowed your pat this time, and moved onward alone. The sun was high in the sky, casting the upcoming smattering of tents a warm golden hue as they slowly came into view, a collection of brightly-colored headstones in an otherwise silent graveyard.

Immediately, you missed the rhythmic beat of Lucy’s hooves on the dirt as you entered the soundless clearing. Even the wind, forever a comfort at your back, seemed to hold its breath.

It was empty.

You surveyed the camp with careful eyes. Five tents, hastily constructed, flaps lowered to conceal the interiors of all but one — large, royal purple, dead-center. A table sat in view from within. A fire pit, lush with kindling and several freshly cut logs, though it appeared to never have been lit. A hitching post, though there wasn't a horse in sight. A weapons rack, battered but vacant.

You continued to inspect the area with growing unease.

But then, you saw it. In the purple tent, on the wide table. A folder.

The documents.

Emboldened by the silence of the deserted camp, you moved in.

You did not make it far.

You heard a twig snap from somewhere to your right, and you whirled, your heart leaping into your throat. Leaves rustled from all around, every corner of the clearing, and you heard the sharp crack of a slap, followed by hooves — Lucy’s hooves — barreling away into the wilderness, away and away, until you couldn’t hear her at all anymore.

Slowly, one by one, as though they were visions from a nightmare, men emerged from within the dense brush, cloaked in shadow, smiles jagged and cutting on the faces whose mouths weren’t clothed.

Your thoughts came to you rapid-fire, like bullets firing from a pistol.

An ambush.

They had known you were coming.

This was a trap.

Wriothesley had been right.

Your limbs shook. Your mind went foggy. Your fear was streaked with shafts of other emotions—regret, shame, resentment. Longing.

You shook your head to clear the haze, clenching your jaw, flexing your fists.

You didn’t have time to regret; you didn’t have time to wish.

You would get out of here. You had no other choice.

You had to get back to him.

But you were alone. They had known you were coming. Lucy had been scared off. No one was coming.

You were alone.

They began advancing.

Blades with wicked edges glinted in the afternoon sun as they emerged from the shade of the trees. You clutched at the hilt of your sword, savoring the tiny fraction of power you reclaimed at the feeling of the warm leather against your shaking fingers. Fingers that you found were getting increasingly difficult to control.

You fought to master your breath.

One man stepped ahead of the others, brandishing a razor-sharp rapier in your direction, your eyes following the way it swayed in his loose, unworried grip, light and free as wild barley. His eyes gleamed with profane delight from over the cloth secured around the lower half of his face. You didn’t need to see his mouth to know he was smiling.

“Right on time, my lady,” he sneered, voice reedy and meandering. You had never hated the honorific more. Several of the others snickered. “We’ve been expecting you.”

You met his gaze, willing yourself to maintain your composure as you assessed the situation—two, three, four Treasure Hoarders stood in the clearing with you. They didn’t appear to have any horses themselves; at least, not any that were nearby, so hijacking one to make a swift escape was not an option. It seemed all four men carried various swords; not a bow nor arrow in sight, but that could only help you, as you wouldn’t need to concern yourself with avoiding or deflecting ranged attacks while focusing on the close-quarters combat. On defending yourself from their blows. Looking for an opening to make an exit.

You unsheathed your sword, the metal hissing against the scabbard. You widened your stance, rolling your shoulders, willing your breathing to a slow, controlled pace.

Dozens of lessons swam through your mind and you fought to sort through your learning.

So many lessons. So little to show for it.

Wriothesley’s voice floated to the forefront, a memory as sharp and piercing as ice.

Don’t overthink it, he’d told you, over and over, lesson after lesson.

Muscle memory and instinct are your greatest ally.

Trust yourself.

You tensed, ready to trust yourself, to trust him , even if it was too late, to at least try —

Something slammed into your arm and side and you gasped, your sword clattering away across the rocks and into the thicket. Gone.

“Ah, ah, ah. I don’t think so,” sing-songed a new voice.

A low, feminine laugh warbled from over your shoulder and the four men echoed, reveled in the cruel mockery of it. You felt as though all the blood drained from your body. The edges of your vision darkened in panic, further blurring the tangle where your sword now lay, hidden. Out of reach.

Five. There had been five tents.

The woman slowly made her way around you, inching into your line of sight excruciatingly slowly, playfully, circling around you like a vulture circles its prey before it dives. Her eyes glittered, impish and hostile. She held an enormous claymore in her hands.

She opened her mouth to speak.

Don’t overthink. Trust yourself.

You lunged before she could utter a word.

Wriothesley hurried, urging the mare forward, faster, faster.

The Melusine in front of him froze, going stock still in her place on the saddle. Her shaggy, dusty rose hair whipped in the wind and she placed a tiny hand on Wriothesley’s wrist, drawing his attention to her.

There was another horse barreling through the woods, not far ahead. Chestnut, with an auburn coat. A familiar leather saddle.

A saddle which was empty.

Wriothesley wasn’t sure he remembered how to breathe. He pressed into the stirrups, signaling his mare to stop.

Lucy, in the distance, slowed her gallop, noticing the new arrivals; darted directly to them.

Trow frowned as the chestnut mare came to a sliding stop a mere few feet away, tossing her head and stomping, hoof to hoof, more agitated than Wriothesley had ever seen her. He hopped off the mare and went to her, checking her over for injuries or any sign of her rider. She seemed fine, if stressed. Nothing on her to indicate what might have happened to cause her separation from you.

“Your Grace,” Trow said abruptly, blue nose wrinkling. Her eyes flicked away from Lucy and towards the denser forest ahead, narrowing in concentration. “I smell something… just over there. Sweet, but bad. Like gasoline.”

Wriothesley’s stomach flipped. He looked ahead at the thicket, but beyond it was utterly silent. Unmoving. He could vaguely make out the trampled shrubbery from where Lucy had emerged. His hand felt heavier than stone against the side of Lucy’s quivering neck.

He flexed his fingers against her, scratching lightly. For her, for him.

“Wanna help me save our friend, Luce?” he asked softly.

Lucy, of course, said not a word; but whether or not she understood what Wriothesley was asking, her gentle brown eyes seemed to agree with the sentiment.

Wriothesley turned his gaze back to Trow.

“Can you ride?” he asked.

She hesitated before nodding shallowly. “I can get by, sir.”

“Go back,” Wriothesley said. “Notify Neuvillette of what’s happened and where we are. I will take it from here.”

Trow's look was long and searching and for a moment Wriothesley wondered whether she would protest his order. But then her worried lilac eyes softened and she nodded once more. Her tail flicked behind her. “Be safe, Your Grace.”

Wriothesley took the reins in-hand and quickly mounted Lucy. He gave the Melusine a small smile. “Thank you. You too.”

He didn't even have to signal for Lucy to go before she was off, hurtling back towards the trees.

Back to you.

Falling back on your months of training in the Pankration Ring was easier than breathing; particularly at the moment, when it seemed breathing had suddenly become very difficult.

You acted without thinking.

You shot forward, swiftly sweeping a leg out from beneath the prowling woman, sending her hurtling onto her ass before she could register you had even moved. She made an undignified squawk, throwing her arms out to try and save her fall, the claymore slamming into the ground, fanning dirt out around it.

The others burst into action, trying to ascertain the best way to subdue you, kill you, you didn’t know, it didn’t matter — you didn’t allow them even a second. You dove for the woman’s claymore, unclaimed at her side, your fingers closing soundly around the hilt before spinning to face your attackers, the new weight unfamiliar and unwieldy in your palm. You would adjust. You had no other choice.

The woman had clambered back to her feet, yanking a dagger from her boot with a vicious snarl that raised the hair on the back of your neck. A lock of dark hair had shaken loose from beneath her hood. Her eyes no longer held any trace of the violent glee they’d had a moment ago; searing rage was all that was reflected in them now.

The masked man dove, rapier swinging in a wide arc towards your side; you deflected it with ease, the clang of metal on metal ringing in your ears as the heft of the claymore easily intercepted the strike.

You adjusted your grip, the shift in weight causing your fingers to slide on the hilt.

Another lunged, sword pointed for your gut. You narrowly avoided impact, sidestepping on already unsteady feet and directly into the range of the woman, who was ready to pounce on your moment of imbalance.

Clearly, subduing you wasn’t part of their plans. And you were sorely outmatched.

You weren’t quick enough.

Swift as a viper, she lashed out, bronze dagger flashing in the sun the only warning you received before you felt its bite. She nicked your dominant wrist, loosening your grip on her claymore—your only weapon—

You dropped it, your hand disobeying your order to hold on as blood dripped down your trembling fingers from the wound on your wrist.

You wouldn’t walk away from this, you realized then, as the claymore fell. No level of skill would allow you to overcome this.

Fool. You were a fool. And you were about to die for it.

You scrambled for the claymore once more—

One of the men sent his boot hurtling into your side, throwing you off course and forcing all the air from your body.

You slammed down onto the rocks and curled in on yourself instinctively, defensively, tucking your legs into your chest before pushing yourself away, away from them; from the threat. You fought to catch your breath, but your lungs and throat burned like ice.

Your back hit the base of a wide tree and you could go no farther.

The woman gestured angrily at one of the men, who then yanked the claymore off the ground. She stalked over to your hunched form, eyebrows lowered.

She flipped the dagger in her hand and squatted before you.

“That’s enough,” she cooed, flicking the tip of the blade across the curve of your neck, softer than a kiss. You felt a sting followed by the feeling of—something warm collecting at the base of your throat. “This is pathetic. It's getting hard to watch.”

She swung her unarmed fist then, and the resulting impact on your head set your ears ringing and your vision blurry. You vaguely made out the sensation of...of being tied, restrained, bound at your wrists and ankles.

You thrashed, but you were too late. You could barely move. Your wrists burned as you pulled. Your head pounded. Your legs would not—could not—obey.

“Get the canister,” one of the men ordered, the words hitting your ears as though delayed—you felt like you couldn't keep up with the pounding in your skull. Another man disappeared into one of the tents, reemerging after a moment with an opaque container in hand.

Your nostrils flared at the familiar smell.

Gasoline.

The woman clicked her tongue, looking down on you. She wiped her dagger on a pant leg, smearing your blood onto the fabric. “Disposing of evidence. Those pesky Melusines. You understand.” Her voice was as casual as if she were discussing the weather or the latest play at the Epiclese. “You know, I had planned on killing you first ,” she explained evenly as the man sloshed the liquid from within the dark canister onto you. You gasped and recoiled, the liquid colder than you would have anticipated, overwhelming your senses as it sank into your clothing, onto your skin. The woman leaned forward, gently taking your chin in her hand, forcing you to meet her gaze. She stared at you hard for a few long seconds. “But then you went ahead and pissed me off ,” she hissed, pushing your face away roughly and stepping back, out of the spreading pool of accelerant.

You couldn't suppress the coughs that wracked your body as you continued to inhale the fumes, as you continued to fight. One of the men approached you slowly as all the others retreated, a torch lit and flickering in his hands. The sun was still high in the sky; this flame was not meant to offer warmth or illumination.

It was meant to ignite.

Something in you cracked and fell away as you realized... this was it.

There truly was no way out. There had never been a way out.

You couldn't do any more against them now than when you were a child, quivering and confused and helpless. The faces before you were different, yet you had not changed at all.

Powerless.

You had failed. You’d failed your family. You’d failed yourself. And there would be nothing left to show for all your efforts, for everything that you were or could have been but ash and regret.

You wished you had been able to protect them.

You wished you'd been braver when it truly mattered.

You wished you'd been a little more selfish.

You wished… You wished—

Everything went white and chills wracked your body at the sudden onslaught of freezing air against your wet clothes.

The world erupted into chaos—hail and snow and shards of savage, unforgiving ice. Shouting rose from somewhere in the camp, but you couldn't make out who they had belonged to or what was said.

The blizzard glittered beneath the morning sun. You fought not to squint, to try keep your eyes open in the face of the storm to see—to see—

There he was. Wreathed in the torrent of rime and burning frost.

And finally, you breathed.

a/n: title from 'war of hearts' by ruelle

it goes without saying that the ‘updates on saturday’ plan is no longer going to happen lol. im a STEM girlie and my job is very mentally taxing so i don’t always have the energy leftover to write, no matter how much i want to. and tbh then i end up rushing to get something out on time that i’m just not happy with lol

on that note: like i mentioned above, i was still not satisfied with the last chapter so i made some changes and it shifts the context quite a bit

essentially i had 2 paths in my mind for how this could go angst-wise, chose one, heard a loud WRONG buzzer, and then changed it so it is instead the other lmao

aaanyways my b one of these days i will actually have a work finished before i start publishing it (no i will not)

hope you enjoyed xo

#wriothesley #wrio #wriothesley x reader #wrio x reader #genshin impact #genshin #genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #genshin x you #genshin imagines #reader insert #reader inserts #lark.writes #🌊

[harley-style]

VBS fans i offer for you an AU : VBS in the Reaper's Game aka TWEWY.

Ok ok SO. This is before their RISE event aka Kick It Up a Notch and shortly after Find A Way Out. The four of them are heading to weekend garage before BAM they die

They dont know HOW they died is the thing. That was wiped from their memory.

The one who personally puts them in the game is Neku but Joshua supports this decision (neku is the conductor in this au nc shinjuku fucked with his existence blah blah handwavvy canon). Theyre both personally interested in this group (and WxS but theyre still alive) bc the group is breathing life into Vivid Street and shibuya by extension.

Such important souls should not die so early so like, yeah, theyre given a chance to fight for their lives.

Neku goes to them in a reaper outfit and explains to them (patiently bc akito firmly goes into denial for the first half) that they are DEAD and they will be given a chance to be ressurected (incorrect but vbs are kind of not in the right mental space to brain their way through this) by playing a weeklong game.

Toya is immediately suspicious and asks why specifically them.

Neku doesnt answer bc honestly confidential, and kinda just says its a whim even tho its rlly not, VBS needs to be alive. Joshua personally sees into a potential future where VBS doesnt exist and its kinda bad.

How are our beloved street musicians doing you ask? Well.

Kohane is scared, but she handles her terror well. She asks the right questions and quickly adapts. She thinks Neku is hiding something (he is) so she has the most questions about this 'game'. She doesnt want An, Akito or Toya to be dead, so shell do her best to ensure that isnt a permanent reality. No matter what price she has to pay.

Toya is very skeptical about the Reaper's Game, but atp he doesnt really have a choice. Its not only his life on the line here, its the people most precious to him as well. So he squares up. But the poor boy reverts back into his cold facade when neku meets them. He only softens when he notices An (Akito can tell how he really feels on the inside so he doesnt feel the need to soften around him)

An is literally two seconds away from a total mental breakdown. Out of everyone she is handling it the worst. Shes thinking about vivid street, her family, her DAD...nearly works herself into a panic. Toya and Kohane hold her hands to keep her grounded, but only barely.

Akito is similarly not handling it well bc goddamnit, why did it have to be his team? They dont deserve this. Hes angry and accusatory towards neku, but his senses have sharpened to a point that he notices a few holes in neku's explanation. But the bastard doesnt seem intent on actually explaining, so once again, akito has to piece things together. Similar mindset to kohane-- he will do ANYTHING to get them out of this fucked up game.

Neku himself is pleasantly surprised by the fire in VBS' eyes and feels kinda guilty about whats about to be done. He explains the entry fee and it doesnt go well.

Kohane needs to lose her voice -- its something she feels brings her to VBS so she considers it very important. Her personal challenge will be to connect to her teammates without the power of her voice

An will become an Eri-Shiki situation and will have Nagi's appearance for the duration of the game. She needs to face her issue about being reminded of Nagi, and wanting to be like her when she doesnt need to-- An needs to find value in herself first.

Akito loses his passion and this hits VBS hard. Akito, i consider, is the literal backbone and foundation of VBS that keeps it working, yanno? Hes very meticulous when it comes to his teammates, his value and the most important thing that kept him going is his burning desire to chase his dream. IG he's like rhyme? He cares about his VBS, but he no longer understands why they chased after...what was it again? (Throughout the game he mostly just likes hanging around VBS and having fun with them. He would still very much like to leave the game but like...yeah

Toya is tricky, bc its not actually explicit what he values most. The entry fees are also meant to help the players in a way, so i cant just take his love for music bc there would be no point lol. His entry fee is...probably the ability to express his love. I feel like he needs to be able to show he loves his team despite it being taken from him.

Ofc, in true TWEWY fashion, they lose memories about their meeting with Neku, so they wake up confused and something missing

Kohane is with Akito near Hachiko. An and Toya land somewhere near Main Street. They all quickly realize something is wrong. Akito panics when he realizes Kohane cant talk. Kohane has to keep an arm on him at all times to keep him from spiralling and to prevent him from leaving her behind. Bc of his lost passion, akito comes off a lot nicer, which is weird, but kohane doesnt know why it unsettles her until later

Toya is a lot colder, this time, but he cares a lot about An (his entry fee wasnt his love for his teammates but the ability to express it ig) so he holds her hand all the way once he recognizes her. An initially doesnt realize she looks like Nagi until Toya points it out...by being a dick lol

An: Toya! I found you!

Toya: ...who are you?

An:...its me? An?

Toya: You dont look like An.

An: wtf do you mean *sees reflection* WHY DO I LOOK LIKE NAGI-SAN????

Theyre accosted by a mean-spirited Reaper who tells them they are dead and they have 1 week to win to be revived. Toya quietly points out that akito and kohane had been there before they ended up here. So begins the search.

They all instinctively form pacts bc theyre stupidly in love with each other and they trust each other. They are In Sync!!!

They do struggle though -- kohane has to act a lot bolder to attract akito's attention. Kohane quickly loses her shyness in the determination to survive and drags akito along, whos confused as to why kohane is trying this hard. Kohane slowly realizes why akito is acting a lot more subdued -- his fire, its gone. Hes not passionate anymore.

Akito rlly only cares about reuniting with VBS. Hes not thinking about how to get revived immediately, thinking he can just take his time. They work better as a team, yadda yadda.

So kohane has to struggle being the only one determined to get out

VBS reunites chaotically bc Akito sees An and is like Toya what are you doing with Nagi-san? And An is like akito its me tf! Surprised mf is he. Kohane explains (with limited vocab) that they need to survive for one week and complete missions etc...or face 'erasure'. None of them want to be erased to like yeah might as well.

An is having a TIME as Nagi. Bc as it turns out, some reapers are actually big RADder fans! They keep asking her to sing when she comes across them and she tries to oblige but ppl can tell when youre pretending to be someone youre not. Poor An has to live with the fact that shes barely like Nagi, even if she looks up to her so much.

Im sorry but we r also going thru an AkTy divorce arc 2. Toya resents akito's current situation bc wtf happened to his partner??? Akito is worried about Toya's sudden attitude and can tell hes mad but doesnt understand why. Akito is FINE. But stupid Toya doesnt see it that way.

Poor Kohane actually needs to wrangle these idiots bc akito cant muster up the willpower to, An is a little distracted and Toya isnt helping. With her voice out of the picture she really needs to try, with them. It forces her out of her shell more.

An slowly realizes that its not fun being seen as Nagi, bc shes quite proud of herself. Akito actually helps her make this conclusion bc he is attuned very well to VBS. No i will not shut up about how much attention akito pays VBS. Anyway An cries abt wanting ppl to love her for HER and not NAGI. VBS tells her shes being stupid, they already love An Shiraishi and no one else.

Toya is a lot less positive, sometimes even bitter, especially towards AkKh. He still very much loves them with all his heart, but you can resent a part of your loved one's character, yknow? He doesnt like that Akito is a lot more chill now, almost following along with Kohane. He no longer has his sights set forward and that fucks Toya up a bit. Where do they stand now, if his partner looks so lost? And man, Kohane. He appreciates that shes stepping up, but theres an ugly feeling thats welling up inside him. Its kinda like the feelings Akito had for kohane pre-main story ish.

AKITO. man akito. Akito starts off strong, willing to take the heat with Kohane and VBS, but on day 6 he practically doesnt give a shit. Kohane has to drag him everywhere, to get him to do anything. He has to be bribed. He just doesnt see the point, plus they figure out that they can just come back as reapers. He and Toya get into a fight about it -- toya pointing out that reaper duties would interfere with practice, and akito getting confused as to why theyd need to practice. They discover that akito no longer recognizes rad weekened and thus has no desire to surpass anything. Rather than his passion (honestly at this point theyre the same thing), they took his DREAM. Ouch. Its a good thing he still likes being a musician with VBS. But he thinks its just a fun thing. Kohane and Toya get really mad. An tries to mediate.

They all nearly die on the sixth day but Akito finally gets out of his funk and helps them. He may not understand why theyre trying so hard, but he loves them (he is a kind and caring boy fight me) and hes willing to try for their sakes

Kohane struggles with inferiority issues, but most of her struggles are physical. She really just needs to recognize that her value isnt just her voice, she is valued as KOHANE. She also becomes a good leader (not that VBS has a leader, just someone who takes charge in certain situations) bc she is willing to do anything she can. If she cant be a good singer for VBS, shes going to damn well shine in other ways.

Same thing with An and needing to be Valued as An Herself, though there are a lot of angsty stuff that happens throughout the week. An breaks down a lot, its not pretty. Especially when a reaper lets it slip (hes a part of the Vivid Streed community) that nagi is Dead DEAD and cue An not wanting to return to her old self bc she desperately wants Nagi. So she is also resistant to the idea of ending the game which doesnt sit well with kohane or toya. Eventually she does admit that she wants just to be AN, not Nagi despite how much she wants to see her again (but she cant). She learns acceptance!

Toya is desperate to leave the game, and is almost harsh for it. He feels so fucking hollow and depressed and he hates it. He wants out. He pushes them a lot and its only akito getting angry that hes acting like his father that toya gets a reality check. It nearly breaks him. He loves his father, but he doesnt want to end up treating his loved ones the same way his father has treated him. He apologizes after a minute of self reflection.

At this point, in the seventh day, theyre all in agreement that the goal here is to find a way out of the game. By the seventh day, they have to fight neku and its an extremely difficult fight. Neku hits hard and he hits home, both physically and emotionally. Its more of a test on his part, he needs VBS to truly shine, and they do. Akito, even without his passion/dream, displays that he loves, and he loves fiercely. He loves VBS, and thats all he needs to fuel him further and further.

Kohane learns to shine and impact others even without her voice. She is a heavy presence on the battlefield and demands your attention, giving her friends time to whittle away at the enemy

An does things her own way, and she does so by riding the momentum of her teammates. She dances to the beat of her own tune, and even though she wears the appearance of Kotaki Nagi, its clear that she is An Shiraishi and no one else

Toya learns to channel all of himself. He has a distinct ugly side, and with it he learns to wield it without hurting others, but instead support them. Just ok im losing words for this but he is there he learns to accept himself yeah thats how he fights

Neku deems them good enough and shifts down the plane and explains to them, finally, why they specifically have been chosen to play this game. Its very ominous, his warning of "Shibuya needs you. It needs VBS" bc YEAH NO PRESSURE RIGHT. Anyway, they learn Neku is like chill af and they get his card. Akito bugs out bc. CAT???? WTF??? neku doesnt explain but invites them to Mr. H's cafe instead.

They wake up in hospitals. A week has indeed passed since they got killed lmao. A worried ken visits An, Ena is sobbing over Akito, Kohane gets piled on by Minori and Emu, and Toya gets worried Tenmas lol.

VBS goes to the SEKAI (previously being unable to in the UG) and tells the VS about their troubles. MEIKO doesnt let them out of the cafe for HOURS. Miku Len and Rin hover over them, and even KAITO and Luka seem worried. But theyre gonna be ok.

VBS, after getting out, are a lot more cohesive as a unit. Now youll catch akito referring to kohane and an as his partners along with toya. Toya has a bit of a mean streak and his vocals have gotten more powerful. Kohane gains a hell of a lot of stage presence and An begins to defy expectations, bc everyone always was like "just like nagi, just like ken, just like taiga" to her but now shes unapologetically An to everyone.

Thats not the only thing thats changed with VBS. Now theyre able to identify Reaper aligned stores and mostly hang in there. They meet Shiki in Gatto Nero and become instant fans (especially akito. Hes delighted when hes offered a flexible job from her lmfao)

An is a little uoset that her town hid a big secret from her, but mostly doesnt dwell on it bc like, hell, shes been through the wringer. She DIED, and came back to tell the world she LIVED, BITCH.

vbs meets hanekoma and honestly mr h doesnt know why secrecy is a thing anymore and exasperatedly tells them highly edited accounts of neku and joshua. And their world. Vbs realizes that, yeah, they really are THAT important, and while they are pressured, theyre just all the more incentivized to practice and become the best musicians. RAD WEEKEND is now just another stepping stone for them -- they have their sights on bigger and grander things.

Which is why, during RISE...things happen a bit differently. Kotaro, Arata and Tatsuya are in for a big shock bc Kohane KILLS it from the get go, white lines and all. An is so fucking proud (and she went through the nagi angst already so no "she looks like nagi :(")

things calm down with EVER and Kotaro and Arata. And then VBS comes on stage and blows the crowd away. Wheeee.

Taiga still does the thing where he challenges a bunch of teenagers and young adults but is absolutely thrown for a loop when, after revealing the secret, an goes "i know. Youre a dick for keeping it secret, btw"

VBS nearly matches Taiga and that serves to shock all of them even more. Where the hell is this fire coming from? Taiga begins to doubt his intial impressions of VBS. He thinks they could actually surpass rad weekend, but doubles down and slams them with his full strength

And Vbs. Doesnt even. Flinch. (Well, yeah, compared to fighting a 24 story tall monster who can absolutely toss you at a building, an intensely singing middle aged man is significantly less terrifying. Like. Noise is based on emotions, negative emotions especially. So like, theyre pretty intense, you gotta fight them with your full soul.)

Vbs loses only bc their voices cant properly convey their passion, but the fire in their eyes dont die out. Theyre steady, and more than ready to take on whatever bullshit the world decides to throw at them.

So when Ken finds them hes surprised to see them all just chatting quietly. An asks him to explain why vivid street lied calmly. An finalizes her resolve -- she wants to take nagis dream as her own, and fulfill it in her own way, with VBS.

Oh yeah, ken still trains them, but VBS also gets in contact with a bunch of the reapers who want to give them a hand. 777, especially, takes an interest in them. Vbs expands their community to all around shibuya. Everyone is like, why is vbs running around shibuya like all the time without looking tired???? (Bc they went through 7 days of exactly that. Running around shibuya without looking tired.)

Anyway more fun HCs their pin powers: kohane gets puppy (forgot the brand but its happy puppy? Puppy? The paw brand one fuck) pins and pins themed around spring. An gets star types and ones that let her move around the field heh. Akito has fire based ones and minor telekinesis. Toya somehow has a basic ice pillar, lightning, and the healer pins. He was their angry healer.

Joshua meets them at one point and Akito immediately susses him out. Neku tells them joshua is his boss and vbs is like Oh. 🧍‍♂️ (they are legit terrified of him. Joshua thinks theyre cute.)

Vbs also starts dating shortly thereafter, but their dating lives are a mess. They dont know what to call each other! Bc atp girlfriend and boyfriend feels too shallow. They default to partners but its rlly more than that. Kohane starts calling them her soul, akito follows with his heart, an calls them her lights and toya gets rlly sappy and calls them his everything. They dont know what theyre doing. Someone help them.

Like genuinely theyre not sure if theyre dating or just really really clingy, and theyre not interested in exploring it either. Theyre just happy being together, yanno?

Kohane starts up her solo shows again but this time shes experimenting with styles. She missed her voice a lot and is a lot more self assured so she makes more mistakes but gets a lot farther with making her voice a unique tone.

Akito no longer has that filter holding him back and just pours his whole soul out. Ken is so fucking proud. He refines what akito has and lets him loose

An also works on her stage presence, starts upgrading more than just her voice. She gets lessons from haruka! And her charm shoots through the roof (shes a quick study lololol) she nearly gets scouted by a label but is like nah sorry ive got a music group? Im just doing this for training 😊 she and kohane also go to WxS for lessons on acting and stage presence!

Toya, in a surprising turn of events, dives into classical music (patiently explaining to his father that he still wants to pursue his music career with vbs) bc now...now toya wants to devour EVERYTHING. All music. Because every music is valued. He expands his repertoire and truly comes up with some of the most unhinged demos for VBS (some are unreleased bc vbs only does the best but they keep the unreleased ones bc its just plain fun, they realized along the way that they dont HAVE to sacrifice what is fun for what is exceptional)

Overall VBS just gets a major upgrade and joshua is as pleased as pie bc shibuya is once again thriving. Now if only he can get the other units to thrive too... thats only if they die, like vbs did, and get put into the game ofc.

#polyvbs #pjsk #proseka #project sekai #an shiraishi #kohane azusawa #akito shinonome #toya aoyagi #touya aoyagi #twewy #pjsk x twewy fusion #ive been stewing over this au for a couple of weeks #might make art of it too idk #vivid bad squad #vbs #vbs kohane #vbs akito #vbs toya #vbs an #prsk #au

[oscconfessions]

i see alot of slander on me favs (trophy, pillow, blueberry) or my kins/other hearted (airy mostly) and for my kins i would be like yeah sure whatever but when its my fav im like

"YOU DONT UNDERSTAND WHAT A TRUE SIGMA ALPHA MALE IS GRRRR HSUT YOUR PIE HOLE GRRRRAHHHHHHHH TROPHY IS MANIPULATIVE BC HES SMAR TNOT HIS FAULT EVERYONES ELSE A BUNCH OF SLOBBY FUCKING DUMBASS BO GO BRAIN THEYRE DUMB ANYWYA HES SHCOCOL HE HOSULD HAVE SHINE HE SHOULD BE MROE OF AN ASSHOLE ACUALLY AND PILLOW SHOULD KILL HER TEAM FOR THE FUN BECAUSE I DONT CARE WHAT YOU THINKSITS ITNERESTING TO ME TO ME TO ME YALL CANT EER HANDLE A TRUE GIRLBOSS I BET YALL WONT EVEN RECONIZE WHAT A HASTAG GIRLBOSS IS WHAT IS A GIRLBOSS WITH NOT GASLIGHT AND GATEKEEP WHAT IS A MALEWIFE WITH NOT MANSPLAIN AND MANIPULATIV EHUH????? BLUEBERRY DID WHAT HE HAD TO DO TO WIN TOO SO WHAT IF HE WAS LAZY AND LONELY YALL DONT SEE THE DEPT THE DEEP DEEP DEPT OF HIS SOUL, WHAT IF HE LIKE BEING ALONE WHAT IF HE DONT BT WHAT OTHER CHOICE DOES HE HAVE, AND YOU KNOW WHAT I HOPE HE DONT FIND SOMEONE ELSE TO BE WITH I HOPE HE STAY ALONE BECAUSE I WANT TO, YALL DONT GET HIM LIKE I DO HE CHEATE DHTE GAME AND FOOLED EVERYONE HE GOT ROBBED AND STRIPPED BY THE WRITER IT AINT HIS FAULT HES ACTUALYL SMART AND STRONG AS FUCK MAYBE YALL R THE ONE THTA DUMBE DHIM DOWN TO BEING A LOSER THAT FALL INFORNT OF THE GATE OF HEAVEN YOU DONT FUCKING KNOW HIM LIKE I DO IM A HATER HATER IM A HATER OUT OF SPITE IM A HORRIBLE PEROSN OUT OF SPITE AND MAYBE MAYBE MAYBE I LIKE HORRIBLE CHAARCTER BC I MAYBE MAYBE MAYBE YOU ODNT GET THEM I DO YOU DONT EGT ITTTT"

i wrote this purely out of spite and internalized someunexplainablequeeridentityphibia, but mainly i was angry bc i culdnt get my spoon to scoop up the piece of pudding in my chè khúc bạch cup 🥀

.

#confession #/ii #/ii/trophy

[prettyboykatsuki]

you can ignore this if you want cus really i'm just curious (extremely) about this poem

how to be a dog both fascinates me and confuses me bc i actually don't get it?? like the author said this poem is in fact about dogs but i'm just so ??? poetry in general is hard for me to understand but would you be so kind to explain this poem to me? like how do you perceive it? what makes it your favorite poem of all time? what type of emotions and thoughts did you felt when reading it for the first time?

sorry if the last question is too personal, you may ignore it. i'm just very much intrigued by this poem.

HI. thank u for this ask because i love that poem so much and i think of it every singe day!!! i dont think its my favorite but its definitely one of my favorites ever!!!

kane says he was inspired by a question in a song that asks "Do you want to be a dog?" so yes the poem is about dogs but i think it would be more accurate to say it explores what it means to be a "dog" and what it would be like for a person to adopt doghood as a practice.

ive said this before but dogs as a figure in greater society are associated primarily with ideas like loyalty, devotion and subservience and domestication. mans best friend but also the roles they are expected to fill. all dogs are manifestations of their owners will.

a shepherd, or a guard, or a being to love us unconditionally. dogs do not have the free will to choose these conditions. which isn't to say they are incapable of love - but it begs the question, if a dog understood the role imposed upon it, would it be contented with it in its entirety?

if a human with free will is to take on the mantle of dog, could it handle these kinds of restrictions? and is the awareness of the restrictions on you - paradoxical to the nature of being a dog? being a dog is by definition a role that lacks sufficient awareness of self.

play your role. listen to your owner. in exchange be fed, loved, and cared for - but never truly free. a dog doesn't long for freedom.

 Next you must learn to relinquish all control over everything you might wish to control. You must learn to prefer to be led about by the neck on a piece of string, or staked to a neglected lawn by a length of chain.

in these conditions, to want freedom is in itself antithetical to the life of a dog. the life of a pet. could you, a human being, accept doghood?

the last line of the poem is what really cements in that being the central theme of it

"If you want to be a dog, you must learn to believe that you are not in fact a dog at all."

the only way to survive as a dog is to forget you are a dog at all. it is for you as a human being to abandon your status of self-awareness and free will in exchange. do not contemplate on the things before you. do not waver at the idea of freedom. you are a dog after all and dogs play their part even when the world is unmerciful. when you know too much you are no longer a dog.

You must learn, once you have sampled the freedom of a life without a chain, that it is better to return and be chained again. Or you may learn that it is not—a fugitive is also a kind of dog. 

a fugitive is also a kind of dog is a response to dogs who do not fit the mold we make of them - often abandoned or roaming the street etc.

in general - this poem to me largely is a thought exercises examining ideas like free will, empathy, and love through the lens of dogs and their complex relationship to human beings.

the first time i read it i was mostly shocked by how perfectly it suited the gojo fic. i found it closer to the end of writing and it perfectly tied in my ideas. but fundamentally - it makes me feel contemplative and inspired i guess. i just think its a great poem

#return to sender

[bonesandthebees]

BONES YOUR SAND DUO IS EVERYTHING TO ME DO YOU UNDERSTAND?

the new chapter was so good I love love love all the sand duo were getting

wilbur has been having a really hard time with his faith and honestly tommy isnt helping much so im glad phil is there

phil was slowly learning a lot of concerning stuff about wilbur and his past already, but now he got to learn how fucking young wilbur is (which probably changed his whole view on him, he was starting for a long time and theres definitely a difference on what wilbur being very young implies about all his behaviour compared to if he were like phils age)

while he already knew that wilbur was questioning stuff I think he only now learned how big of a toll its having on his mental state and how much he bases his worth on being a good pythia and that (plus brainwashing) is where his "faith" is mostly coming from

and phil being phil is very good at handling it, respectfully, carefully and with honest care about wilburs wellbeing and wants/needs

bc lets be honest while I love tommy to pieces with all his flaws he isnt being the best for wilburs questioning stuff, bc he tends to assume a lot and push wilbur too much sometimes

and now idk how intentional the contrast with clara religion stuff was but actually clearly showing wilbur that their worshiping of kristin isnt bad was very important for wilbur to realise that a)their religion isnt wrong and b) worship can be nice/happy like that

anyway to sum this up it makes me so happy that phil is there and wilbur has him and phil is helping and being an attached basically parent already and im obsessed with all of your sand duo content in general you nail it so well every time while still having it be different, youre a sand duo genius bones

hope youre doing good and thanks for the amazing perfect beautiful chapter <3

thank you!!!! :D sandduo my loves

yeah the thing is phil's guesstimate for wilbur's age has been slowly sliding down since he first got to the temple, but even then 22 was still younger than he was expecting, and yeah, it definitely changed his view of wilbur to say the least

and of course that ties into wilbur's self worth issues regarding his value as the pythia. phil now gets it because, oh yeah, he was 12 when he was put in this position and now he's only 22 of course he's fucked up in the head because of it

yeah this isn't phil's first rodeo. tommy doesn't know how to handle situations like these, while phil definitely has a better idea of how to help. so while tommy and wilbur have developed this really close bond that's forced wilbur to connect with his own humanity a lot faster than he would have otherwise, it's also not great in the long run at all.

oh I definitely wanted to compare and contrast a bit of the clara and kristin worship stuff by showing how phil prays to kristin, especially regarding the blood sacrifice. because it sounds scary, but it's not. it's a beautiful moment of connection for phil and his goddess.

ty i'm so glad you enjoyed!!

#ask #jiksvokrat #through a glass divine

[thedreadvampy]

btw obviously talking pure shite about the Corinthian thing but among the many things that makes me not want to watch the show. why ISN'T it a 90s period piece?

like honestly it's the same as with Good Omens being modernised for TV. Good Omens is EXTREMELY rooted in the specific cultural context of the end of the millennium. I just don't think it made sense to set it in the 2020s.

but so much of the plot and aesthetic of Sandman is so very of its time. the experience and ideologies of the feminist characters, the queer characters, the alt characters. the aesthetic of wealth and power. honestly the entirety of Rose and her brother's storyline is so rooted in the serial killer and stranger danger and suburban terror of crime in the 90s and I know that the serial killer obsession has come back around but it's a very 90s flavour of paranoia. like obviously a lot of the series is timeless but at the same time the main plot IS very rooted in time, especially Dolls House and A Game Of You, and it definitely can be modernised more readily than Good Omens but like. why would you. when the aesthetic of the comics is a) deeply rooted in the alt culture of the early 90s and b) fucking iconic. like the original run of Sandman finished the year I was born and despite not having been a goth in the 80s or 90s on account of being an Infant, the 80s-90sness of my style is so so so part of how I put my adult self together and What's Wrong With That?

and there's a lot of sticking points tbh. mostly again I'm thinking of the comic's handling of transphobia and homophobia. which I am concerned that this adaptation is going to address by "modernising" it out of the picture, instead of talking about it. which like. this is a different reservation I guess bc it's true whether it's a period piece or a modernisation. but. I am very concerned that under the guise of modernising it this is going to lose an awfully lot of its crunch.

and ymmv bc I know a lot of people take very deep issue with how the comics handle queer themes and I think a lot of that criticism is fair. but I also think that as a queer and traumatised kid the thing that made Sandman so deeply resonant and meaningful for me was that it was ok with getting messy. like it had a lot to say about homophobia, abuse of all kinds, lateral aggression, and it spends I would say almost all its Real World Main Plot Timeline being very interested in the nuance and moral greys and self- and laterally-inflicted harms among queer people. like it involves a lot of stories about abusive or unbalanced queer relationships whether it's with Alex Burgess or Judy and Foxglove (then Foxglove and Hazel) or the Corinthian. and it also wants to spend a lot of its time tangling with the support but also the spite and ignorance of specifically small queer communities (I think that Doll's House is more interested in depicting queer community as an oasis in the dangerous world of heteronormativity covering up violence. whereas A Game Of You is much more about lateral harm - everybody in that book except possibly Barbie is some flavour of queer, and maliciously (Thessaly) or through ignorance (Hazel and Barbie) or through anger (Foxglove) they are frequently spiteful, bigoted and unpleasant to each other, but Barbie, Wanda, Hazel and Foxglove still draw strength from each other's presence and care. and that rings very true to me of queer communities.

(for the record. my (cis) reading of A Game Of You has always been that it's a fairly direct condemnation of people like Thessaly. she's posed as being cruel and self-serving and ready to throw other women under the bus for her own benefit, and I always assumed we were meant to read her calling Wanda a man as part of that, and that that was the point. that Thessaly is in the book to make a point about TERF/separatist thinking. idk whether that's the intended reading or whether it's an appropriate thing for Neil Gaiman as a cishet man to be cracking into, but it's how it read to me as a 11 year old in 2004 who hadn't yet heard of TERFs or really had any idea about trans women, and i find it hard to take away a reading where we're meant to agree with Thessaly given the way Wanda is framed and the way Thessaly is framed throughout the story. I think there's more complicated stuff to unpick around like. whether Wanda's in the story to suffer and die for the Nice Cis Lady but I really have not ever got why depicting transphobia in this context has been so frequently read as endorsing it.)

like. The thing that makes Sandman deeply important to so many people is that it's messy and uncomfortable. it is. mostly interested in painful questions without answers. it's interested in power, rape, abuse (parental, familial, intimate partner, social, sexual, physical and emotional), homophobia and transphobia, CSA, bigotry, grief, trauma, madness, suicidality, addiction, etc. like. Almost everything in Sandman is focused around people and experiences that are hard to talk about and treated as scary or invisible and that's the point.

and to me again as a queer kid going through trauma and violence and abuse. that's what drew me to it. it's a really visceral read for me bc I think while I don't always agree with how it approaches every topic, it doesn't shy away from engaging with the actual messiness and complexity and no-right-answerness of those marginal experiences. it would not work as well if it was too afraid to say things that might have bad interpretations. and that was what made it matter for me, especially when it comes to queerness and disability and survivorhood (ie things I've experienced) - like it always felt like it had enough trust in its characters and audiences to let marginalised characters be fully fucked up and flawed and experience and inflict unjustifiable things. queer and marginalised characters in Sandman are, in my opinion, relatively unusual in that a) they're everywhere in the text and very internally diverse, there isn't a sense of Here's Our Gay Character Who Represents Gays, and b) they're neither utter villains Because They're Gay (/addicts/mentally ill/disabled/whatever) or Sad Objects Of Pity. they're given space to be extremely flawed and extremely sympathetic Whole People Who Fuck Up.

and my worry is. especially given how a lot of mainstream discourse is around representation and Problematic Media. but also tbh given how increasingly anodyne and pandery I think a lot of Neil Gaiman's output has been getting in this ourouboros stage of his career. I am almost certain that the Netflix Sandman series is going to sand a lot of the crunchy sharp edges off the story. I do not think we're going to see the willingness to make the audience uncomfortable and uneasy (and I'm not talking about the horror elements, but the human ones) and I think that's. honestly totally understandable from a production standpoint bc I think there are things in Sandman that would cause huge backlash if you screen them today. I also. think. that the story would be worse without them.

(none of this matters bc I'm not going to watch the show. why would I do that to myself I KNOW I will not enjoy it even if it's great, bc the comics are embedded somewhere 2 inches from my heart and I'm not. interested in What If That But TV. I can just read the comics again.)

#red said #honestly the only Gaiman adaptations I've really liked are ones where I'm ambivalent to the original #i thought the Starz American Gods was really good but then i thought the book was a lot of good ideas but strung together #into an almost incoherently rambling brick #like i have read American Gods i think three? times and I could not for the life of me tell you the progression of events #every time i read it i leave with snapshots #i loved the film of Stardust. the book is. fine. #i think the exception is Coraline but while i really like both the book and the film #i didn't read/watch either of them until i was like 18 and i think my contact was in pretty quick succession #i also like neverwhere but that doesn't count bc technically the book is an adaptation of the TV show not the other way around #honestly i think. (also bc Mirrormask s one of my all time top films). that i only like Gaiman's screen work when it's original. #really like the janky Neverwhere series. LOVE mirrormask. the Doctor's Wife is about the only good 10th doctor episode #i do not think based on Good Omens and what I've seen for Sandman #that Neil Gaiman produced adaptations of Neil Gaiman classics are a good thing

[volfoss]

hi teehee kof rant (mai centric bc i have a problem etc) below the cut and all that

burden of being a mai fan is having to see a million horrible pieces of content in each kof game (and fatal fury too my god) but it genuinely drives me insane how they write her in a lot of the games. like its 50% of the woah shes a conventionally attractive woman and thats all the character development and depth shes given. Any other time its just maybe 45% "kyaa andy" and 5% lets have her have a nice time w her team. now like. im biased due to hating andy (due to how he really treats her a lot of the time and just how her character is so so based around him instead of letting her be an actual character)

now i know that its like a part of her character that shes super in love w andy and SUPER feminine (other than the ending for fatal fury special where she remarks that she needs to be less masculine) but it really feels like SNK just poured all the budget and effort into seeing how sexy they could make her/the physics of her animation (again iykyk). esp considering her development section on the wiki (of heres who her boobs and ass are based off of, how when they introduced her ""swaying bosom", the developers were awestruck". like i understand fully that they are trying to yk. make her a sex symbol (which worked a little too well imo). it really bled into how a fair bit of fans treat her as just a hot body and never really consider her personality or literally anything other than how her clothes fit or how they can make her outfit worse.

but it really to me feels that the devs were like ok. 4 traits should work: mean to other women sometimes (mostly over appearance), SUPER irrational (which i dont believe but im also like. overthinking pro here, ill elaborate later if i remember), in LOVE with andy, and hot. occasionally they try and throw in a bimbo angle. i feel they really ignore a lot of things they COULD touch on (ie literally ANYTHING with her past, how she gets along w literally anyone on andys team outside of andy (we again. get tiny hints of it but rly not much), or literally ANYTHING outside of the few traits we very vaguely get.

so many of her endings are just either SO andy centric or just her getting drunk. and thats literally it. not even to get into the team stories which are normally a bit better (96's has made me INSANE for weeks tho) but esp 99, that was really disappointing. that one really felt like they were treating her as a footnote and butt of the joke (which happens a lot of people being like wow girl you are crazy about andy) but it feels like in some of the endings (2003 comes to mind, where you get a tiny hint of woah theyre putting in that she cares about her friends and then its like no lol actually its just all about andy)

again i understand how the way that she is written doesnt really allow for a really good read on her as a character (her personality section on the wiki is fucking abysmal. tldr of it is wow shes cheerful, 2 full paragraphs dedicated to how much she loves andy, shes a "traditional and ideal japanese beauty" and like. a tiny note on how she gets along w the womens team/terry and joe). but she really does have more than that of just genuinely being a very kind person and very goofy, as well as a very talented and dedicated person.

so what rly irks me (this is not number one but girls need to get their thoughts on her past out somehow and by god im doing it here) is how her past isnt really ever touched on except for tiny hints here and there. sure we get info on how her grandfather trained her and the tiniest inkling of stuff on her parents (that theyre dead) and how andy came to train with her grandfather when they were both pretty young. but they really dont ever elaborate on how her grandfather basically passing all of her training off to his friend (who is yk. a canonical creep and lecherous old man trope to a T) and training andy impacted her. we never learn how she handled her parents death. or even her grandparents death. or even the enormous weight of being the last shiranui ninja. its all focused on wow lol she fell in love w andy super early on and thats IT really. MI2 (pretty sure. might have been MI 1) does go into a tiny bit of detail on her grandfather training her to move silently and bribing her into that with anything she really ever wanted, and how that even impacted her with the beginning of MI2, where she uses training from her grandfather to throw the letter at Andy, catching him by surprise. but we really dont get a lot of introspection on that in really any of the mainline games (or manga that ive read, all of the ones ive read just have her plotlines be the same as the game (of half andy and half woah hot lady)

not to mention again in the 96 team stories, she mentions that after King says she also cannot participate in KOF, she says this:

^ which literally lines that drive me insane that they NEVER elaborate on. surely her childhood had to be lonely with her being an only child (presumably) and it not really mentioning any friends she has outside of the womens team and a TINY bit of terry and joe. which god. there could have been SO much potential with her and terrys relationship. we literally could have had besties but instead its normally used for a joke of wow mai is SO scary about andy oh nooo. and same w joe. i think tbh the fatal fury movie honestly nailed how i would have their relationship in an ideal world, with them just teasing each other and being a bit bitchy but in a fun friendship way yk?

in regards to the womens team i do normally enjoy how they handle the stuff with her and them, its VERY clear she cares about and loves yuri and king, and even chizuru (i hold the 96 ending SO close to my heart tbh) and just literally if they could pass the bechdel test for literally once in their life, it would be ideal.

mai just genuinely has a lot of potential in terms of writing and literally if u just go through her quotes its just really clear to see she doesnt get that potential ever explored (esp in some of the fatal fury stuff, where shes having to fend men off from touching her or hitting on her.)

tldr snk hire me i understand her etc

#twist rambles #i have to put my like 30 page analysis doc to use SOMEHOW and if its making angry tumblr posts then so be it

[audiovisualrecall]

I will never ever reblog anything telling anyone that a thing they like 'was totally stupid all along' or to 'read/watch another book/show/movie'. Because besides being a nasty attitude, like. That's not what any of this is about! You can't hear 'oh the author is a bigot now and it's horrible' and go 'oh yeah, their stuff was Obviously bigoted and horrible all along, I could Tell, and if you even liked it at all ever ur an idiot and a bigot'

Like. If you're not giving money to the author and ur trying to educate other ppl WHY DOES IT MATTER if you still like the thing????? Stop moralizing ur hate on for something, stop trying to Win at morals. I'm Queer, Nonbinary/Trans, and Jewish and disabled, I hate who jk Rowling has become and I hate her for Ruining what the books meant to me and so many others. I read tons of books where the author includes some shitty stuff or biases I don't agree with and I go yeah I don't like that.

The issue is NOT the book series. I don't care if the books contain bigoted shit, bc fictional content doesn't even compare to how a real person is hurting people. Plus so do like 90% of books, like, somehow I still enjoy the dragonriders of pern books despite some iffy stuff abt gay men and abt consent, bc the core of the story is what it meant to me.

The house elves and handling therof specifically is racist, how she handled characters from other cultures is iffy, and goblins I suppose could be seen as antisemitic trope but that level of antisemitism is kinda everywhere so I'm used to ignoring it in books and movies. But anyway. The issue is NOT the books, beyond 'don't buy them (firsthand at least) bc it gives her money'. The discussion of 'jk is a terfy piece of shit who is hurting ppl' should not become about some ppl feeling morally superior for not liking a book series (or pretending they never liked it) or insisting the series was never even good anyway so its not a loss. It's good to suggest alternatives to read for people who feel like they can't read hp anymore but love some of the messages or some setting or plot elements, as long as it's not phrased like you Have to discard hp like it's trash.

Lets actually be honest here: The books are good, not amazing, not some height of literature, but they were good books for kids. They were good for a kid who wanted to be braver, who wanted to have powers, who wanted to escape - into a magical world, into a book.

Look: The books said people who value others on some idea of purity are bad people, unequivocally. The books said fascism is bad. They said kids can't always trust adults to do right by them, which mostly kids know and it feels good to have a book acknowledge that yeah, adults are mean or wrong sometimes.

The books said love and caring and friendship and loyalty and helping others and standing up for others and being open to new ideas are good and important and what life is about. The books said love and family and friendship are stronger than hate and greed and prejudice. Those are important messages! And that is exactly why jk's move to terfyness (and everything else she's up to) is such a betrayal. Because she's become her villain, she has become the thing she wrote as a horrible thing to be, and she's so convinced she's Not and that us queer and trans ppl (and now just. Scottish ppl who want to be independent???) are the Real villains for uhhh wanting to exist and do our own thing???

Anyway the pt is she betrayed us and she won't ever get money from me willingly again and I'll try to spread the word and convince others not to feed the beast, but anyone going on abt the books is just trying to feel morally superior and is self righteous and trying to get an A+ in social justice which is literally always the problem.

Let's like. Please for the future focus on the actual issues and Not on debating the quality of the book series??? Otherwise it's also obvious u just don't like the books and are just using this as a justification for that, which isn't necessary. We don't have to justify not liking shit, we don't have to sit on that and wait until the author reveals themself to be an asshole to go 'ooh yes!!'.

#this is like the eragon thing too that popped up cause paolini supports ai art which is shitty and hes a little bit of a schmuck #and ppl decided to go oh yeah lets rag on the Eragon series and act like everyone should agree it was bad and shouldnt like them #its definitely 'i dont like the thing but its popular but oh look the author is unpopular now so i can rag on the thing now and everyone #will have to agree w me bc its a Moral thing bc the author is an asshole now!' #fuck off

[cielospeaks]

so bc i complain abt hating the series my faves are from im trying to think of why. so i can try and handle these problems

-dv: everything is so samey. the cafes always have the same characters, thats when i realized it. its what sells for the game too. angsty backstories where the mothers can never do wrong (even when they do), the attractive characters are always sexyman/sympathetic, and "ugly"er characters are always less sympathetic or villified. its so fucking boring. its like, if antonio and ricky weren't there it wouldn't be a thing id consume. itd be like, if i saw someone like geisha or wu chang on my feed id be like "oh neat" but nothing more than that. not to mention the fandom, their obsession with shipping and superficial things, and just their really like. "if you dont fit into xyz group i will harass you nonstop" nasty attitudes

g o: this one hurts the most but i feel like its just lost its magic to me. i skip events now more than not, i barely play except for logins. heck, like a "oh somewhat interesting" i will cling to bc its fucking hard to get invested in any character in this game. heck, this universe. they added a chaldean doctor character in the latest story and i just couldnt help thinking "why is her design so much more glitzy and showy than others and never given an in universe explanation". it just feels like it was a different game than i started playing. i played and followed this game for a fun, shenanigans story, but one that takes its characters, no matter who they are, seriously and its illustrators are allowed to give them love. now it just feels like a washed-up cash grab with no care for its characters except to generate more hype from a very selective audience. like i miss the funny sanrio collabs, the themed cafes with recent story characters, the lawson collabs? its just really....depressing i guess

g-f: i think the problem i have with this game is the same problem i have w a certain movie, the creators have too much of a bias against certain characters. like the fucking description will say "x smiled eeeevilly, theyre a villain, you cant like them wahhh" and its fucking pathetic. but its clearly whats making the big bucks and fan acclaim so theyre just doing more of it. that + the "oh player character you're so op" that happens in every event. esp the crossovers. i just feel bad for them bc they are such a bad representation of the actual series (coughcoughonepiececougcough). on ig a more serious note theres also the "funny character actually is funny bc of x trauma inserted to make them sexy" which is just despicable and disgusting on so many levels. i dont think it needs an explanation for why its awful but for some reason the fans love it

f-h: honestly this game is a really middle of the road meh one. i think its just meh. i dont like a lot of the "protagonist aligned" characters bc i find their actions really scummy and despicable (theres too many to name) but at the same time its still in bite sized enough pieces, and that kinda thing of supposedly sympathetic characters being nasty and uninteresting/uncompelling is mostly par for course for f-h tbh. i think if theres any big flaw its the fandom, but thats not necessarily the game itself. it is very influenced by the fandom unfortunately and "meme" interpretations unfortunately end up becoming canon (we dont talk abt the b2 retcon that was awful)

#negative #gameblogging

[go7-made]

Trying to figure this shit out again after two years lmao

SO to whomever wants to even read this hello, I’m one of those who decided on disappearing to escape to Twitter from the pr0n bot/ban debacle and now I’m back bc Twitter I feel like I’ve seen too much???? And there is just non-stop information that you can’t seem to get a break from, I feel like it’s just too messy for my foolish brain now. Obviously here is no better but it’s a different kind of chaos I can handle lmao

To be very very honest, I also feel like I can’t share anything personal aside from retweets, it just feels very Public™??? If that makes sense. I read on someone’s post that explained it waaaay better. Twitter is starting to feel suffocating and I’m not sure if anyone feels the same.

I didn’t think I’d be coming back here to start posting again. I just want somewhere to be able to share my shit with full clarity. I’m also glad to see some people I follow never left! I feel a sense of familiarity, I kinda wish I didn’t those two years ago lol

Pretty much an update to me from me: this is mostly ramblings if not a letter to myself, bc I pretty much left whoever I was, pre-pandemic, here. I decided to go through old posts and I feel nostalgic. I don’t have much interest in the things I was most passionate about anymore, but I’m still trying to hold onto them while my support system keeps me afloat.

I’m entering the first week since my sweet father passed away peacefully after taking care of him with my family for 5 years. It had its ups and downs but if I had the chance, I would be more than happy to do it again. I just wish I knew more.

I remember being so adamant about agnosticism—now it’s been 7/9 days since we began the Novena. It seems silly to my mom, but I greet him good morning and good night. I feel comfort in that. I learned a new language because of him. I understand more because of him. I have plenty regrets of not doing enough good for him but I’d like to think he would forgive me. (For some reason I feel like a prodigal child.)

Suffice to say I left here not knowing anything for the future and came back in pieces. I’m just about put together, but the pieces are pretty much in a pile right now. And I’m just pushing them around to get through the day. The initial shock has died down and my tears aren’t falling anymore, but obviously I won’t finish grieving anytime soon. Unfortunately grief can come in the form of morbid jokes. I promise I won’t do that often.

I’m sure I had a lot more to say to myself but I’ll just leave it at that. Anyway glad to be here, this is me rn:

#personal #update

[fiendishpal]

hii fiend!!! i literally adore your art its so pretty and it- it just- *inhales* *exha-*💞💖✨💞💖✨💞🙏🛐🙇‍♂️🙇‍♂️anyways so- bcz u guided me to the osaaka ship and now im in love w it couldya please offer me some fic recommendations? ok, i just love ur art ur one of ny faves lov u have an amazingly sweet and beautiful day!!! :D

sure thing!!

i’ll put them by category here (i also have some art for some of them, i’ll post them when i’ve got the time)

i’ve put a star ★ beside fics that i’ve read a bunch of times hahaha!

canon-compliant

(fics that i think you should read first. mostly canon-compliant. so these are post-timeskip. after their meeting at the black jackals vs adlers game. these really won’t make any sense if you’re anime-only, sorry.)

stay with me go places by sparksandsalt ★

this fic. THIS FIC!!!!! this started everything for me!!! this is the reason why i started shipping osaaka!!!! the way they handled the characters is sooooo!!! *chef’s kiss* they really stick true to the characters' voices and the care they put into characterizations is impeccable. i also love bokuto and akaashi’s relationship here!! they’re so in each other’s lives that bokuto ends up exposing akaashi’s feelings indirectly and accidentally lmao and also atsumu and osamu’s relationship is so funny and hilarious. they are like how brothers are, atsumu showing his support but also clowning osamu in the process

this fic single-handedly fueled me to create so much osaaka content.

i dont know how many times i’ve read this tbh

wait by sanguinedawns

i love the yearning in this fic. the longing and the waiting and the expectation there. they’re trying to be subtle about their feelings for each other but they’re seen at the end but at 4k it’s narrated so smoothly. i love mutually pining idiots.

in the afternoon by yamaboto

this is so!!! i love this so much!! at 1k we see osamu yearning for akaashi once again. i love how they write this short scene. i could really picture the afternoon light coming in through the traditional panel doors and how the light must feel on your skin. 

take what we love inside by yamaboto

this is an established relationship osaaka and how they got together. in the afternoon (the fic above) is a snippet of how warm the writer could put words together. and it really is so sweet there’s a scene where they slow dance and it’s the best. i also love the simple fact that they put in how osamu cannot let anybody go hungry hhaha 

shout softly by lostsunsets

YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW THIS MADE MY HEART FEEL SO LIGHT AND SOFT AND TENDER. THIS FIC IS SO PRECIOUS OH MY GOSH

i love love loooooooove how the author put osamu's love and passion for food and filling in the pieces on what osamu does to fuel this passion --while in the back burner-- while he was still playing volleyball in high school

AND HOW HE LONGS FOR AKAASHI. THIS IS MAKING ME AAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!

GO READ IT PLEASE

we’re in au territory

(the setting is not canon-compliant)

sleeping with the enemy by billionairevolleyboysclub ★ 

the setting is in 2013 haikyu volleyball circuit. meaning they’re still in highschool and are still playing volleyball and they just happen to chance upon each other at interhigh.

 i love how sweet osamu is and how he got his crush on akaashi. and it’s lovely how they wrote the budding of a highschool relationship!! and their take on how osamu and akaashi handle ldr??? it’s delicious. dont let the fake/pretend relationship tag fool you this is very cute i love them so much!! i guess the ‘no drama’ aspect is what i like about this a lot bc osamu’s a pretty straightforward guy esp i guess back in highschool. also the second-hand embarrassment is real lmao

welcome in by risquetendencies ★

in this setting osamu’s still the owner of onigiri miya but the au aspect of this is that they haven’t met before. so basically a meet-cute.

and man  oh mannnnn the tension written here is good food. osamu is written so obviously into akaashi (i mean who wouldn’t) and akaashi is affected by this greatly and it is!!! wow!! i just love how smooth osamu is here and how flustered akaashi gets bc “omg a hot guy likes me????” (yes akaashi, this hot guys thinks you’re a sexy piece of ass please believe it)

 akaashi in a gay panic is literally the best thing. 

blood brothers by billionairevolleyboysclub (18+)

miya twins are vampires and akaashi has a thing for fangs. that in and of itself is enough reason for you to read this. i also love how the writer puts a distinction between atsumu and osamu on how they interact with/ feed on akaashi.

like the dawn by eggsan

this fic is actually inspired by my royalty au but im not putting this here bc of that. i really like how the writer introduced their story. i remember telling someone that the atmosphere of how they write is like the voice of a soft-spoken maiden hahaha it's lovely!! think light academia aesthetic. i also love how i get the doki-dokis when osamu, who is essentially a stranger, gets close to akaashi. i can feel akaashi's excitement and trepidation.

forgive the sea, follow the tide by KyryeDuBarie (18+)★

PIRATE AU!!!!!!

i love the fresh twist that they did here on the classic mermaid/pirate au. the twist being akaashi is actually a pearl diver and at the same time being vaguely hinted as a mermaid hhahaha. osamu's a pirate that got shipwrecked and got washed up on akaashi's shores that akaashi, of course, saved. 

there's a bunch of cool things that happened too that i cannot disclose bc that'll ruin the thrill of reading this. the plot is solid and the romance between osamu and akaashi is gradual but so so sweeeeet!! i highly recommend this!! but better clear up your schedule bc this hefty boy comes in at a whopping 40k!!!!

keep time on me by yamabato

this fic is based from my zombie apocalypse au!! and even though it’s set in the end of the world, they were still able to write it so sweet and comforting????? i only wish osamu and keiji the happiness they deserve :’)

i also like the whole theme of time in the story and how the story revolves around it. it’s very good!!!

the contest between by batman (18+)

akaashi is a documentary director and osamu is his subject. i love  love looooove how the author wrote how stubborn both of them are and how they could clash sometimes but not in the explosive type of way. it’s actually cute and sweet, you’ll see what i mean when you read this hhehehe

AND AKAASHI IS SO LOVELY HERE!!! so lovely!!! and he laughs and smiles a ton and those moments were written in a way that just said ‘look at this angel!’ LMAO idk maybe that’s just me. i love akaashi so much

AND THIS BABY COMES IN AT A WHOLE 75K!!!!!!!!! AMAZING!!!!

#chocomilked #fiend talks #fiendish recs #GIVE THESE AUTHORS SOME LOVE #love love looooove these fics i swear by them!!!! #if i find more i''l update these!! #happy reading tumblr used chocomilked!! hahaha #osaaka #EDIT: added two new fics!!! #let me go around the fics i've read again hhaha

[letthemdrinktea]

A super long post about how I feel about those last few episodes regarding the writing and some of the relationships.

At first, I thought the first part of the season was going really well but now I feel the last few episodes feel very rushed. I get it though. They only get so many episodes a season and they are trying to fit everything in given that it’s the final one. It’s just really unfortunate because some storylines and moments that could get fleshed out get sacrificed resulting in several scenes that could be great but leave you with an unsatisfying feeling because those moments aren’t earned due to the moments leading up to it.

With Elias’s ED storyline (which I was the most interested in mainly because you just rarely see male ED’s get portrayed on television at all and when I saw the hints I could not wait to see how they were going to tackle it.). Its such a delicate subject and would need to be handled with care. Unfortunately, what we ended up with feels a bit messy and kind of…(I hate to say this)…irresponsible and I think it’s because of the writing and because they don’t have a lot of time. I think what’s happening now should have been happening in season 3 (maybe throughout or towards the end of it, somewhere in the middle of season 4 he can actually come to terms with it and then take the steps to seek help). For the subtle hints about his ED, I think that should have been done in season 2.

From Elias’s perspective, his anger towards Amie makes sense because he sees it as a betrayal. With everything he is going through, he isn’t thinking clearly and he is also heavily in denial. The way that is written is fine for me to a point but the biggest issue I have with the way its written is that it doesn't fully make them getting back together in the way they do feel like its fully earned. Even just the order in which he is told by others he is being stupid all before he talks to her. He has so many ppl telling him she did it because she cares and he ends up not really having a STRONG argument against that as to why its justifiable for him to be upset (I guess we could put the pieces together on our own but in those moments we should be able to fully understand his POV and I think the issue is in how this is told to us as an audience and in what order). Then he finally talks to her and instead of it being about the ED as well which is what put a wrench in their relationship in the first place, it takes a back seat and becomes mostly about her going to the US.

So, now the whole situation is in her lap. Now it's somehow her decision for them not to be together when this started bc of his ED that he refused to confront. There is not much of an acknowledgement or realization that he has a problem, that he was wrong and that he needs to make the decision himself to get help. Instead, its all on her as though she was the reason they broke up when that wasn’t the case. I understand that the US is all wrapped up in everything going on because thats one of the reasons he is training so hard and not eating but that should be on him.(Figuring out the US situation could have been dealt with after he decides to actually seek help.)

I wanted to see scenes where Elias is struggling to come to terms with his ED after being forced to go to therapy. I would have loved a scene or two with his therapist to see him maybe rejecting it at first and then realizing after fainting or having a health scare that he should try to work through it with therapy. So far, Elias has had almost no realization whatsoever that what he has been doing to himself is really serious and can have dire consequences. In the scene after he faints and he asks his father “Did we win?” (Which I liked because it showed his warped sense of thinking in that moment. Like bro… you just fainted and all you can think about is a game right now?! But what would have been nice to see right after his dad told him not to worry about it, is a health professional tell him exactly why what he has been doing is a problem to get him to understand why this happening is very bad for him. Then he could look at Amie in the end like he did in the actual scene and she could silently look back like “I told you so” 👏 😤 lol I kid, I kid of course.)

It bugged me so much that they just kept letting Elias play and him still not really getting how serious it is. There were no real consequences to make him realize this. I also did not like how he treated Amie even though she basically saved him after he fainted. They should have talked sometime after that and a “thank you” from him would have been nice 😤. It would have shown him finally acknowledging his ED and that he was wrong. Then they could have put the USA issue back in focus afterwards. But that didn’t happen. He just felt so selfish in those moments bc he did not acknowledge at any point that he was wrong about the whole ED thing and especially the whole US thing.

Now, he has a right to feel sad and even feel like he needs to be a little bit selfish in that moment about not wanting to lose her because she is leaving. That’s human and understandable. (We should have gotten a scene where she tells him what happened with her label and that she is thinking about going otherwise it feels like he just assumes it when the last time they spoke she told him she wasn’t going.) It would have even been nice seeing him struggle a little bit with wanting to be selfish while still understanding she has to follow her dreams and that it wouldn’t be fair to hold her back. The ball being in her court by the end would have made more sense if at this point he decided to let her go so she could do what she needed bc they are both afraid of what would happen to their relationship if they were separated. But that’s not what happened 😭😩.

Any-who, somehow the ball is in her court for whatever reason and it didn’t make sense why it was there in the first place. So now she has to make the decision to come to him and to choose him (by coming to his game) when it should have been the other way around but because it was written the way it was….here we are. Don’t get me wrong, the scene was really sweet. (I still love so many of their moments.) The last scene when he’s looking for her in the stands and finally sees her. The look on his face, the acknowledgement between the two of them that she has chosen him regardless of what happens, that she is here for him, the “congrats” moment and the love declaration was just beautiful but from a storytelling perspective, it doesn’t feel earned because of the build up leading to this moment. We are left unsatisfied because it’s unbalanced.

The way everything was put together in the middle of those moments just doesn't work. I’m referring to him getting hit on the ice, struggling to get up, the crowd yelling “Kroon! Kroon! Kroon!”(which could have been such a beautiful moment but it wasn’t earned because of the build up), then seeing Amie which propels him to go back out onto the ice against the doctor’s orders and score thus helping his team win the game. It comes off kind of cheesy from how it is written. Let’s say he had already started getting help before this point (he’s acknowledged his ED, that he was wrong and made his amends with everyone he talked to about it with and although he and Amie’s relationship is still up in the air after his love declaration, he still hopes she comes), he’s started making some progress, and then him getting hit and falling happens. (Only once was necessary. The struggling was just so dramatic lol). He gets up, he gets called in to be checked, the crowd starts chanting for him bc ppl know he's been struggling this season even though they don’t know all the details but he’s helped get his team this far, they check him, he says he's good and then he sees Amie in his jersey (Well, now he's really good lol), he goes out on to the ice as the cheers grow louder and he scores. They win the game. That would have felt earned to me.

I thought it was so random as well that they had Petra all of a sudden encourage Amie to go see Elias when she seemed so against their relationship before. I wish we had gotten another scene between Elias and Petra proving why he is different than his father so she could feel comfortable enough with him to encourage Amie to follow her heart. It just need something so we could understand why she would change her mind about him (whether that’s with Elias proving himself, Mat’s apologizing and talking to Petra, Petra seeing her daughter feeling so heartbroken about her relationship with Elias or all of the above. It just needed something even though I absolutely loved that golf scene between Petra and Amie. I LOVE Amie and Petra's relationship. It's such a highlight for me when watching. Im so happy they gave her mom a glow up and that she is dating. I would have even loved for her to meet someone new and get married if they had another season (imagine Amie as her maid of honor). They are by far my favorite parent/child relationship on the show next to Elias and Mats. It’s just so precious. (Gosh, I really sound like I only love everything related to Elias and Amie but I promise I love many of the characters and have issues with their storyline’s as well. I write more about that in the end.)

Another thing that I felt got sacrificed was the way they have built relationships between other characters. There’s just not enough build up to me for some of the friendships this season and we are forced to fill in the blanks because some the bonds they share have been built off screen. We don’t get to understand why those characters are at the points where they are with each other now because we didn’t actually see those moments or conversations happen. Those moments which could have been even more meaningful and precious than we see them now, unfortunately, aren’t as impactful as it could have been because we didn’t take the journey along with them. I felt this way about the scene where all of them met up to help Felicia. I wanted that bond for them so much but it just felt a little out of place and felt like it was supposed to be about them coming together as a group of friends when some of them hadn’t interacted with each other much. It would have been interesting if they developed bonds because of the common goal to help their mutual friend but it didn’t go that way. I also really missed the friendship between Ludde and Amie. I was so happy they got a scene and that they seem to be there for each other in some ways i just wished we got to see it developed. I feel the same about the relationship between Elias and Ludde.

I’m nervous about the possible relationship between Klara and Omar. I have no idea how they are gonna make that work in the next two episodes. I wanted more for her instead of going around fixing everyone’s problems and being a business woman. A nice love story with Omar separate from the other characters would have been so nice.

And what’s with all the tragedy being put on Ludde. The dude can’t catch a break. I feel so bad for him. Its like he doesn’t get to be happy at all and I’m hoping that changes in the next two episodes. I wish they didn’t pile on so much tragedy for him and Sam too. Omg, poor Sam 😭. I don’t think making Andreas sick was even necessary or even killing him off. Andreas keeping that massive secret about getting shot was enough to cause some conflict. But I did really love the relationship developing between him and Felicia. I love that they were talking and bonding. I think it was needed for the both of them.

Thanks for sticking with me if you have read everything written thus far. I’m excited but nervous to see how everything ends. Hopefully, it’s something we love and are all satisfied with. *fingers crossed*

#eagles svt #eaglesspoilers #svt eagles #elias x amie #elias kroon #amie conde #amie samuelsson conde

[nabrizoya]

RoW Theories and Things I Want to See

with RoW literally a few weeks away, here’s some theories your way. 

this is Really long. like, really very long; mind you. 

Nikolai might become a disabled character.

It’s just the vibes. If we can take reference from the Too Clever Fox story, there’s a line that says “...and his [Koja’s] fur never quite sat right the same...”, which might hint at it (mostly bc i don’t want him to die). Also if this is indeed possible, it can be used to address ableism if it exists in this universe, especially since Nikolai is someone in the highest position of power. 

Zoya will experiment the shit out of powers. 

Idk why the synopsis says that using her powers might be a great deal, which tbf will be because she is truly the most most powerful atm; but Zoya wouldn’t mind taking the step outside of the old norms and bend the orders until they serve their purpose. That’s the entire goal rly.

But all along, she will consciously keep herself mindful to not hunger or discharge her power in a way that may cause harm. She knows the tyranny of the Darkling and the ways he employed. She knows better. 

More character depth to Zoya. 

Given the excerpts, the book does seem to explore Zoya’s infinite grief. And of course her Suli heritage, which a great part of the fandom consistently wants to shadow what with the talk “white features/ part Ravkan” bs. 

But there’s more. I hope RoW will show Zoya’s dilemma (that was alr hinted in KoS) she has with the power she holds, the responsibility she has with having that power + using it in the way that will not be detrimental to her and the country. It will be a great way to portray her self-awareness and doubt and insecurity. She is a good leader, that much is told in text but not shown. There’s character development from the end of R&R until KoS that makes her evolve from a what she was then to the capable and mature 22 year old she is in KoS. 

Of course all of their capabilities will come to light in RoW but I think Zoya and the agency to her as a character will play an integral part. More so because Zoya is to be the conduit to reversing the current Grisha orders, which runs in parallel with the fact that she needs to go back, go back to the roots of her Grisha knowledge and roots of her i.e. her unending grief and trauma. 

She will need to forgive herself while also dealing with the guilt and anger she may have caused due to her position and power. All of this while dealing with her own complex and contrasting emotions due to her own trauma.

Nikolai is held for treason. 

The word of allying with The Darkling may be out and that is enough reason for the entire country to turn against him. The secret about the monster causes issues more than enough already, and this will plunge the country into deep political turmoil and threats to security. So RoW will be more politically driven. That said...

There’s no overt war. 

By this I mean that there will not be war on the battlefield, both armies or more charging at each others’ enemies and such. Ravka cannot afford one either. The excerpts have already proved that. There will be skirmishes akin to a war scenario, but a complete battle like the last battle in R&R? Like a final battle? That’s not going to be there, I think… What I’m assuming might happen is that the Fjerda and Ravka will take a possible Cold War route, if it isn’t already the case they’re already dealing with atm. 

Ravka’s monarchy will collapse. 

It may become a democracy or any other form of public or majority vote. But the monarchy (as well a possible dictatorship, esp with the Darkling returned) will be eliminated. ...Or so I hope, since it has been alluded to in KoS. 

But that poses many problems. With no one line for the throne, let alone with a crime so dark like a blot on Nikolai’s skill (of taking the Darkling’s help), it is possible that Ravka will shun it, right alongside being torn about it because Nikolai has been, for the best of his ability, a good King. All of this in line with the Resistance rising in West Ravka. 

This ties in with the court matters, especially if I want to hold the further points I make true. The resolution to acquit Nikolai of his charges requires a testification forth a jury which will then make a decision about his motives and future. 

Zoya as the Interim Head. 

After all of this, Zoya’s point about Ravka not accepting a Grisha Queen will be true after all, because there will be no monarchy to welcome such an arrangement. 

But Ravka will need a good and trustworthy leader despite Grisha powers and Zoya is the best person to take care of that. The comment “...becoming a steady leader...” and the “Welcome home, Commander,” were there in KoS for a reason (and this is what I think it will link to). 

That being said, there’s more nuance to this than my summary. Zoya is a character of colour. That—in addition to the already existing threats, objections and possible question of capability in the position—ill play into how she will be able to discharge her responsibility. It’s not going to be convenient.

EDIT: taken from a reblog/addition to the og post:

A smoother/more structured transition

Once after the monarchy collapses and a leader must be chosen, it will not be Nikolai. Nor will it be Zoya, though she might serve as an interim head. What I assume might be possible is that someone older is chosen, someone older and loyal and with the proof of knowledge and service to the country. Possibly by majority vote or elected by a council.

Instead of the sudden change, this can be a smoother (if that can even be said about such a major political scenario change) or more structured. I also say this because a. if Nikolai is indeed charged (and later acquitted), firstly his political career will already hold a blot if the word about using the Darkling as a resource is out and secondly, he’s way too young to serve as the leader (by modern standards, sure, but like, the required age will be set while drafting the constitution? currently its 35+).

Instead, the current cast can become representatives (which Zoya would already be, (mostly the head of the) international committee that safeguards the Grisha all over the world) and the Triumvirate will be dissolved. (it should be, tbh)

And hey, b. after all of this, they can and kind of need to take a step back. Nikolai and Zoya will be able to truly explore their relationship, given how Nikolai mentions how he wouldn’t marry unless he’d have had the chance to court someone and marry someone he barely knows nor knows him. For Zoya’s part, she does know Nikolai but surely probably not the extent of openness that a healthy relationship has, and on Nikolai’s part, he admits he barely knows her beyond as a General except for just little things about her.

They could be able to realize and work on their feelings while alongside being involved with the workings of the country and the constitution.

“One day you will overstep and I will not be so forgiving.” 

Need I say more? Something that Zoya does will cost her Nikolai’s goodwill and we know Zoya knows her practicality and the extent to which she will unapologetically move if there is threat to the country and its King. She will do what was right and required. 

A major part of that line ties in with Magnus Opjer and I think with the confidence in the versatility of her powers, Zoya might as well move w/o any word to the Triumvirate to eliminate the most direct threat to the throne. This will bring splits in Nikolai and Zoya’s relationship. 

How this tension between them will be resolved without compromising either of their values, without playing into fandom stereotypes and others must be carefully handled. All of this while showing the best of their dynamicity, practicality and priority as they carefully pull out just those weak sticks of the jenga without putting the whole country into trouble. And with a war in plain sight, they’d know better than pointlessly argue and would rather see how the two of them are wrong. This ordeal will bring out just how condensed power is in the current scenario, imo. 

Importance on the way women have shaped history. 

Something that KoS has already set precedence for. Zoya being a PoC, Nina taking into account of the sufferings of women she comes across and the consistent ‘Who will remember them?’ will be elaborated on further. As for how it is done and how well it is done, that remains to be seen. 

Baghra is alive but maybe not thriving bc she’s stuck in the Ice Court. 

They entered a chamber where an old woman sat with her hands chained, flanked by guards. Her eyes were vacant. As each prisoner approached, the woman gripped his or her wrist.

A human amplifier. [...] But the Fjerdans used them for a different purpose – to make sure no Grisha breached their walls without being identified.

Kaz watched Nina approach. He could see her trembling as she held out her arm. The woman clamped her fingers around Nina’s wrist. Her eyelids stuttered briefly. Then she dropped Nina’s hand and waved her along.

Had she known and not cared? Or had the paraffin they’d used to encase Nina’s forearms worked?

- Chapter 22. Kaz; Part 4: Trick to Falling, Six of Crows.

Nina will be the one to free her and together they might wage a war from Djerholm together.

This gets even more interesting because we know the anguish and scorn that Baghra feels for her son at the same time; she understands the wrongness that he used to seek and will continue to. Zoya does take Baghra’s name at the Fold when she mourns and rages over how people forget the destruction and most importantly, forget the women. Baghra could be the symbol of the stag as the art piece depicts, or will be shown with relation to the Darkling’s powers.

As for how she will play into the story, perhaps she will be the one to help reverse and find the roots of the orders, in the sense that changes the perception of the Grisha powers for the Grisha as well as the common folk of Ravka. She is the only other person other than Juris and the Darkling to have the age of eras together, knowing Ilya Morozova, and she will be instrumental in giving Ravka an advantage over Fjerda. Either that or she will help in scrubbing the prejudices of Fjerda slowly away with whatever powers she has left. Or both. 

Alina will reappear, but will not contribute to the plot significantly.

Zoya understands that the truth she knows about the Darkling is very minimal not enough to end him for once and for all. It makes sense that she will probably consult Alina for it. So, Malina appearance, possibly at the orphanage. Alina will not directly contribute to this war, but she will play a critical role in defeating the Darkling.

Besides, Alina —and Baghra— are the only ones who know that there has only ever been two Darklings. Zoya did sense, multiple times during KoS, that the Darkling is damn old. Yuri mentions it. And while it is not outright specified, the fact that Zoya thinks that she realizes just how ancient Lizabetha is in context of meeting the Darkling is enough proof for her to seek more information about the age and the older skill of the Darkling. 

And I think it goes without saying that I want to hope that the Darkling and Alina will not meet. Pls, she’s had enough. 

Lada is the lost, other friend that Zoya refuses to bury. 

“She saw her mentor die and her worst enemy resurrected, and she refuses to bury another friend.”

Liliyana is dead, we know. But there’s no other mention of Lada except for the “wondering what happened to the pug faced girl.” Lada is possibly a part of the group of women and a Grisha returning to Ravka from Fjerda, exploited by the parem. She might die being unable to withhold the sheer torment of the parem induction, which will devastate Zoya because Lada was also the closest she’s had to a family with Liliyana. 

Either that or Lada is already dead or dies some other way, and Zoya cannot bring herself bear the grief of losing her. 

Cameos: Inej and Jesper. 

The most likely of the crows to appear in RoW are Inej and Jesper and they’ll play equally important roles in the plotline. Here’s a breakdown of why:

Inej

Inej has taken the responsibility of becoming a slave hunter, and it makes sense for Inej to make an appearance in the book, given that there’s going to be a ship taking the Grisha from Fjerda to Ravka. 

The women aboard are vulnerable and require immediate attention, which Inej will immediately zero in on. She will have enough reason to suspect both Leoni and Adrik on the ship, especially when the jurda parem is still a secret. Leoni and Adrik cannot give that information away because they don’t trust Inej (and have no reason to either). Inej won’t trust them either, not until she understands that the reason why the women are being taken to Ravka and for what reasons. 

Which gives her excellent reason to step in, try to analyze the situation and help the women accordingly.

Here’s an exciting thought though. Once after the entire misunderstanding is overcome and Inej understands (esp. if Nina is brought into the conversation and security and secrecy of the conversation is ensured), there may be discussion about how the Grisha might find a safer space in Ravka.

Inej’s appearance might also extend to playing a pivotal role in giving Zoya the confidence to seek her heritage and where she hails from, to embrace the part of her past and forgive herself and others for her mistakes. 

ALSO, 

Grisha finding a safer space in Ravka will mean that Inej can pitch Jesper’s case for him to Zoya. Being the highest authority who takes cares of the responsibilities of the Grisha, Zoya will be the best person to talk about this with. 

And so, here comes Jesper. 

Jesper

For one, I wish Jesper and Leoni interact, talk and just bond like the iconic siblings they would be. <3 But more than that, Jesper plays very integral to the plot for more reasons.

Jesper’s arc will parallel Zoya’s. Both of them are new to their powers in their own individual sense; Zoya is trying to use her new powers in a way that hasn’t been done before, thereby breaking the Grisha orders of powers and Jesper (assuming he has decided that he might want to learn and embrace his Grisha powers) is learning them afresh. 

This journey of them trying to embrace, learn and relearn and reject older norms and experiment really work in tandem.

That will lead us to a further (plot) theories. 

Ties with Novyi Zem 

As of the KoS end, Ravka has no support from anyone atm. Sure the Kerch will provide funds but Ravka has no real allies. Here’s where Novyi Zem and Jesper come in. 

We know Novyi Zem is a new country and also that it is the second safest country for the Grisha in the universe. As of KoS, their agreements are not renewed and they would be since between Kerch and Novyi Zem, Ravka was forced to pick Kerch. Yet Ravka needs their help in acquiring jurda for the antidote. 

So here’s the deal: Ravka will get their jurda but at many conditions that the Novyi Zem will impose on Ravka to not let exploitation get in the way. 

The conditions imposed could be (these are just some at the top of my head but I hope there are more to ensure the safety and security of the Zemeni, in Novyi Zem and in Ravka too) : 

Naval support from Ravka

We know of the Zemeni ships and ofc Nikolai has been hard at work trying to develop plans to use the sea to its fullest advantage. While the news of the izmars’ya isn’t public, Zemeni can place a condition for technical aid from Ravka since Ravka does have the technical knowledge it can dispatch as a condition.

A Grisha School in Novyi Zem

Think about it. Ravka, despite being the safest place for the Grisha, still isn’t entirely safe. Not all Grisha become soldiers in Ravka, they have a choice to abstain but those who are training are still recruited a honed for purpose alike preparing for war, especially the teens and preteens from the time of the Civil War. The training does take a lot of time. Ravka intends to make a home first and then service, but at the moment, while the Grisha are provided safety, it’s not assured in the best sense. Both the facts about a home and service are in precarious positions atm.

TL;DR: Ravka isn’t entirely safe for Grisha therefore the Grisha themselves too are not + Ravka is war torn. 

So what happens? 

One of the conditions as the next best country that serves as home to the Grisha, Novyi Zem may put forth the prospect of building a Little Palace like institution for the Grisha in Novyi Zem. It sounds morally wrong in the sense that the Grisha there will also be trained for war, but the war will end and soon, the Grisha will not be subject to serve for something but engage in economic activities as anybody else with the progression of time.

All of this won’t happen immediately either; learning their powers, honing it in the way that is unocnventional from what it had been pre-RoW and that transition + the building of the establishment in Novyi Zem and laying foundation for the  transnational panel or committee for Grisha that Zoya talks about will all take so much time. 

A few Grisha representatives from Novyi Zem can learn at the Little Palace and by the time the construction of the institution is done in Novyi Zem, these Grisha, along with other willing Grisha who either want to return to the country they were born in (like Leoni) or are offered to teach in a different country can do so too. 

There will be stricter terms so as to not ensure exploitation and possible colonization in these nations. 

Zoya mentions in one of her chapters that eventually there will be a need for the a  transnational panel or committee for Grisha. Jesper can Zoya can make it possible, adding in other countries to the panel slowly as the war recedes. 

Kaz and Wylan? 

Least likely to make an appearance, in my opinion. I think they’ll be mentioned plenty of times or brought up once and given great importance for how they can help in the side plot. 

Shu Support: 

This is more a hope than an actually theory dfbkdhjadfh but Makhi might have to step down from the throne because Ehri will take the place; either as a Queen (no...) or she might oversee the process of strengthening Shu Han and finding a leader (if she doesn’t want to become one herself). 

Ehri is capable, more than capable despite the little we know of her from the last chapter in KoS. All I hope is for an understanding and friendship between Nikolai and Ehri (and the subsequent cancelling of the marriage duH) for this to happen. She has little interest in statecraft but with the time she might spend with Nikolai, she might change her views. Even if not then she still gets the happy ending she deserves with Mayu (which is canon at this point rly).

Emotional Development or Breakdowns

Okay but I really, really, really hope we get to see all the three protagonists lose their shit and deal with their trauma, seek help or trying to stop isolating themselves or anything else they do to cope? Nina, Zoya and Nikolai, all of them cry, all of them get to completely lose it, let themselves be human and healthily cope and learn to rely on the people they trust the most. Like the sheer power and potential to show the myriad of ways to deal with grief, sadness, stress and more and make use of the trio’s backgrounds to show healthy and diverse ways of helping themselves, by letting themselves and others help them is just *combusts* Incredible! 

That being said, can I also ask for moments of fear and desolation from the side characters too? Impending war isn’t small business, it will take its toll on people, and all these reactions just cement their fears and what they value the most so. pls. Humanizing them rly. 

The Saving Each Other 

As much as I mostly kinda hate this trope, there are traces in the KoS that Zoya might be the one to end Nikolai’s affliction. On the other hand, there is talk of Nikolai helping Zoya control her powers which seems counterintuitive when you consider that Zoya knows that there is a line that she must never cross and that she is very, very careful about it and will continue to be. 

They can instead be the ones who motivate each other in times of distress as they always do (as shown with how Nikolai tries to gain control over his monster during the burning thorn ritual in KoS, allowing himself the vulnerability but also knowing that giving up will be unforgivable to both himself and Zoya as well) but I seriously do not wish for each other to be the ones directly ending one another's misery. Or perhaps this is just a fear imo that Leigh wouldn’t even take the route of (in which case, thank fuck).

Stab Stab Stab 

Zoya gets the chance to kill the Darkling with the rest of her friends. After all, Darkling does call them all his old friends. Just Julius Caeser him all the way and put a bow tie on the book. *chef’s kiss* Everybody deserves a second chance... at ending a tyrant when it fails the first time. 

+

So far, this is it. Rule of Wolves is in less than a few weeks and im- asdfghjkl. not Ready. i’m more Worried than Ready.

#zoya nazyalensky #nikolai lantsov #nina zenik #rule of wolves #king of scars #jesper fahey #inej ghafa #ehri kir taban #hanne brum #grishaverse #alina starkov #mal oretsev #baghra morozova #the darkling #kos #row #leigh bardugo #row theories #zoyalai #tw ableism mention #tw war #i hope these aren't insensitive. esp the one point about war + the theories about novyi zem #and ofc the disability part too #if the way i've expressed some points are hurtful i sincerely apologize. i will change them and learn better #thanks for reading this super long post lmao #long post // #cw long post #??? #anyw #row spoilers

[cestcirque]

Hey, I was wondering if its okay to ask your opinion on timeskip!Kenma and the idol culture in Japan.

I was so intrigued with it when reading Aperture and The Cardinal Set and, altough I know it's mostly centered around V-League, I can't help but wonder how other characters that are famous after the timeskip would act regards the strict unwritten rules that come with stan/idol culture. Mostly Semi, that you touched with his own story, and Kenma.

Like, we know that Kenma is a famous streamer/youtuber post-timeskip and maybe the indepent nature of the job would give him a bit more freedom when it comes to that, but he still would be under public scrutiny. So I wonder if scandals regarding his dating/social life could happen and if it would have any negative consequences when it comes to his career.

I wanted to know how do you think he would handle all of this?

(Oh, and thank you for writing something that keeps making me think and reflect on it's various messages and aspects even months after i finished reading it. It's truly an special story<3)

Aw heck, this is a good question, thank you 🤩

I can analyze fan culture until the day’s end, it absolutely fascinates me. My thoughts under the cut ⤵️

Short answer is a scandal can happen for anyone in the public eye if fans are passionate enough about a certain piece of information (i.e. for Semi, who writes songs about relationships to begin with and while it isn’t his main job, I think he’s unlikely to get a scandal out of being seen at a girl’s apartment. But for Atsumu? WOOF)

So I think if Kenma were to fall into scandal, it’s likely to come from a different angle…

Compared to Atsumu or Semi, Kenma is in a different category. In terms of the content he produces, there are no formal contracts and the only thing binding him is Cultural Norms™. BUT we know he doesn’t care about other cultural norms like seniority or keigo—I can see him not caring if viewers know about a relationship (though talking about private life might not happen often in the first place). Perhaps he’ll get tired during a late-night stream, slip up and say something about the person in the other room, then catch himself and leave the chat wondering 😝

We also know he has a global audience (vis-à-vis Pedro) so it’s definitely possible he interacts w fans who don’t have a strict “no relationship” ideal. The fact that Pedro is a fan also indicates that Kenma simply has a different fanbase (i.e. in it for content, less likely to get possessive), so I wouldn’t think he’d be a traditional “idol” in Japan. If he were to slip up during a stream, only a percentage of viewers would try to pry

NOW him being the founder of a company would present much more challenges than his fans—I imagine he’d have to register Bouncing Ball in order to operate in any way. If he were to make headlines, it wouldn’t be while streaming, or being seen at a girl’s apartment. I think it would be more about making movements with the company that the public might deem strange. Combined with the fact that he’s only willing to sponsor Hinata “if he isn’t boring”? Kenma is in the position to make some flippant decisions about money flow or some real power moves that might look bad from the outside

And the bar for “what the public deems strange” is also pretty low in Japan—I’ll give you a real life example bc of course I will. After the Great East Japan Earthquake of 2011, there was a singer / actor, Gackt (I think?) who worked hard to raise funds for people in the affected areas. With his level of fame, his influence did a lot and made a huge difference in the recovery process. Nevertheless, news outlets accused him of using his fame to collect money and keep it for himself. When that was proven untrue, the public said he was just selling himself out

In conclusion: I can see Kenma using his platform to help something or someone very important to him, then having his actions called into question and somehow getting backlash for it

#thank you for this!!!! this was so fun omg #if ur writing a fic u have permission to use this #not like I’m gonna write anything about it myself 😅 #ask #anonymous