#cure my executive dysfunction

[herawell]

.

#i washed my hair at midnight so now i have to stay up till 2am for it to dry #bc my roommate is sleeping so i can't use the blow dryer #moving out and being $$ indepndent ain't all it's cracked up to be #i do my early morning meetings in my bed while still underneath the blanket #then brush teeth have breakfast and go in at ~10am #come back by 3 or 4pm #and then it's just scrolling on my phone #till 2am #still haven't found a local doctor yet #barely done any cooking #haven't furnished my room beyond bed & desk & tons of boxes lying around #i keep feeling outpaced by ppl #by my male coworker whom i'm partnered with in everything so comparison is always inevitable #by my roommate who's barely 20 and still a college intern #by my oldest younger sib (same age) who has grown into themselves in the last year #and is doing things completely on their own in a way i never did at their age #and my mom has openly said that said sibling is better than me #keep trying to take one more step in the hope that it'll. idk. #give me serotonin #cure my executive dysfunction #break my rut #negativity cw

[mrsmarlasinger]

Hmmmmmmmm quick question! What do you do when your executive dysfunction has reached such a critical state that you:

are actively ignoring things you desperately need to do

are ghosting your employers (even though you can make it all go away by doing the one thing you most need to do: send an email and QUIT)

have almost three dozen notifications that you can't even bring yourself to look at

completely unironically have done nothing but sleep and flip between two apps for days

are fucking up your professional/financial future even though you need to move out in a matter of months

✨and✨

are paralyzed by anxiety that keeps mounting to increasingly unsustainable heights

YET

you GENUINELY CANNOT figure out how to PHYSICALLY FORCE YOUR BODY to do the (extremely short, extremely important) list of things you keep telling yourself you're going to do

because at this point you can't even shower or change the clothes you've been wearing for days on end?

Asking for a friend. I'm the friend.

#i'm actually really really scared at this point #i don't know what to do i can't get unstuck i feel like i'm being fucking possessed by a demon of sloth or something (idk i'm not catholic) #the last time this happened THIS badly was a year ago in my last semester of college #i literally was not going to graduate bc I couldn't finish my online course and i was every day paralyzed with fear but i COULDN'T #eventually i sat down once for 8 hrs straight and once for 27 hrs straight and knocked it out in two sittings. how did i do that #i feel like i have no control over myself. all i am all the time is tired and miserable and scared and i can't stop sleeping i just can't #i sleep through every single day and i can't stop it. i can't even stop myself from eating chips and candy and fucking bullshit like that #i'm literally just in what feels like a crisis but it's the most static passive crisis on earth and looks from the outside like NOTHING #like you talk to me and think i'm fine and just being really lazy but inside i am panicking and i hate myself but i'm STUCK #idk what to do like i honestly wish i had meth or coke at this point lol. anything to force my brain out of this fucking static haze #i think i'll pound some kratom. red to gloss over the anxiety‚ white for energy. just parachute a couple grams and cure it. i hope. #god you have no idea what i'd do just to get off tumblr and reddit for ten minutes #personal #executive dysfunction #adhd #depression #actually adhd #actually depressed #untreated adhd #vent #vent tw #vent cw #tw vent #cw vent #mental illness #mental illness tw

[033h]

realized its because my depression is back not just because its aries season -_-

#executive dysfunction at an all time highhhh and like suddenly i actually do not caree #im considering antidepressants bcus my executive dysfunction was literally so bad yesterday but i also don't want to #knowing so many people who are on them... #but i also want to get stuff done and care :3 #realistically i am just going to keep going and take a break when i graduate and hopefully that cures me for a while

[defiant-firefly]

In terms of what I've been up to lately, I'm planning on massively overhauling my bedroom (I still live with my parents and with the way the economy is going, I seriously doubt that's gonna change any time soon) because these meds have made me more aware of just how badly I need a space that suits me. I have big ideas, and hopefully this treatment stuff will help me realise them, even if it takes for fucking ever. Like, the skills I'd need to learn for this would be quite numerous I would say so yeah it's a difficult project, but a big one I can gradually work on over time with other stuff I wanna do so maybe I'll get somewhere with it. Literally, after we moved here years ago, we put wall paper on one wall and I had plans to paint the rest of the room but I did one wall, and an unfinished pegasus onto it and we did nothing else to it. Same with the rest of the house honesly. Only room that got finished was the paint in the kitchen. After all this time, the exact same off-white walls everywhere and the grey carpets have kinda killed it for all of us I think, but now that I have an actual emotional requirement for a room that's comfy, cosy, and very much me, I'm gonna see if I can change that.

Dad also says if I actually go ahead with my little dream project of putting a train track high up on the wall that goes all around the room, and it actually looks good (cause I don't do things by halves okay I will take the idea and run marathons with it), he'll let me put another one in the living room themed on the ocean. It pissed mum off because it's not something you're supposed to have in a living room, and she doesn't want any guests assuming the worst, but she's wrong. An ocean themed model railway around the room would be unique, interesting, fun, and loved by everyone worth the time of day, in my humble, totally unbiased opinion.

Speaking of mum, she's gained an interest in making the garden look nice. We were gonna work on a pond and stuff together but she's kinda just doing her own thing so I'm gonna get a bunch of Diglett and Dugtrio garden ornaments and gradually hide them around the place until she notices. She won't stop me! She's used to my shit! But I'm wondering how much I can get away with before she notices the Diglett takeover lmao

#firefly life #i just felt like making a little post #no one is outside talking to me so I dunno #a little post for anyone actually interest in what I'm up to now #I haven't actually done anything to be clear #this is why I'm on meds I have chronically awful executive dysfunction and have been unable to do basically ANYTHING in YEARS #and that's depressing you know? #but now I'm getting ideas and there's actually HOPE that I'll be able to do them!!! #so I'm feeling much more optimistic about everything now!! #it's not a cure or anything but I'm hoping this just makes it EASIER #I just want a life man and this is pretty much my only chance at that #is that an unhealthy mindset? probably. #but the NHS just send me around in circles diagnosing me with 'curable' depression and anxiety #and then having the audacity to claim they've CURED me when NOTHING has changed!! #sick of it man #you know dad decided to pay for me to go private for this? that's how sick and tired he was??? #literally giving me his life savings so I have a chance at a life of my own #can you believe that? #he's a grumpy old man that's almost retired that blames every technical issue on me switching him to Firefox #and is a master of showing up exactly when you don't need him and for avoiding making decisions to an infuriating level sometimes #but fuck man #there's a lot of people in the world that WOULDN'T do that if even if they could #I'm looking into trying to do something special for his birthday and christmas and stuff cause I just #don't know how to tell him how important him doing this for me is #sure he doesn't get it like at all and has a hard time remembering anything I tell him about it unless it's the thirty fifth time #but he's doing it anyway and that's so amazing of him #I don't want him to regret this #we've already seen improvements for me but if I can have some semblance of a life again #the three of us would be overjoyed #and his hard earned money wouldn't have gone to waste

[bisxualbucky]

I will abide by the results of this poll

#today is the day that tumblr cures my executive dysfunction #or not #🫡

[justsomeweirdbandkid]

Absolutely obsessed with my new desk setup

#WALMART HAD SUNSET COLORED CURTAIN LIGHTS FOR 5 DOLLARS AND THEY'RE EO PRETTY #AAAAA #also depression cured /j finally fought executive dysfunction and cleaned my room

[azems-familiar]

the date for my carpal tunnel surgery is scheduled for the 23rd. yall i'm gonna be so fucking powerful when i'm not in pain all the time anymore are you kidding me. been dealing with this since 2017 so i like... don't even remember what it feels like to Not hurt to type.

like oh my god. that fic i just posted? if i wasn't in nasty burning pain atm like.... i could've written it in half the time i swear. i will be unstoppable. i'll even be able to game again for long periods of time! i'm so excited for this actually wtf

#ramblings #assuming it works ofc but i'm hopeful because it has such a high success rate #if this gets fixed the only thing stopping me will be my executive dysfunction #and that gets cured by hyperfocus so <3

[binch-i-might-be]

so what kind of crystals do y'all think would fix me, asking for a friend

#i fucking love rocks so much i already have a few crystals actually #rocks were a special interest for me when i was in my early teens. i got a whole book on crystal formation! #i'm not superstitious in that direction but honestly if someone were to tell me with enough conviction that this rock absorbs my bad vibes #i would be very willing to believe it at this point #WHAT CRYSTAL CURES DEPRESSION AND EXECUTIVE DYSFUNCTION IS WHAT I'M ASKING #also sleeb. Which Rock Makes Me Go Zzzzz #rayrambles

[redrreign]

i always forget that drawing pictures cures me until i am sitting down drawing pictures

#my executive dysfunction gets in the way and then all the pictures in my brain get stuck in there and start attacking the walls #but then. finally. i draw a picture. an image perhaps. and it stops being wedged in my brain gunking everything up #and then my skin starts fitting again and my brain stops buzzing #and i think wow this cured me :) and then. forget immediately #next day im like ''ugh why is my brain full of bees'' RELEASE THE IMAGES IDIOT. #mutterings

[mimi-weka]

cleaned my apartment - thousands healed, millions happy

#my depression is cured #peak mental health #I'm winning in life right now #executive dysfunction who? #i hope this lasts a few days #mimi talks to the void #but the void left me on read #my text

[untrisha]

My churrent project! I got this little guy this afternoon and spent the rest of the day painting him. As soon as this layer cures I'm gonna do a cute little forest design on the tabletop and maybe paint some surprise critters/monsters in the bottom tray 🤔

my pup is v sus of the table for some reason he keeps walking up to it and just sort of staring and then walking away giving it furtive glances

#sigh why does paint take soooooo long to cure #ive been taking a new adhd med and ive been like remarkably productive on it #like its so much easier to cut through the gulf of executive dysfunction and just DO things #huge fan #me #my stuff

[e-wwis]

I smoke one (1) cigarette and suddenly I'm functioning executively

#why does nicotine momentarily cure my execute dysfunction #there's gotta be a study for this shit #adhd b wilin

[breelandwalker]

Sneak Peek - Spoons In Spades

At a little distance he saw a fire, and beside it there sat three giants, busy with broth and beef. They were so huge that the spoons they used were as large as spades, and their forks as big as hay-forks: with these they lifted whole bucketfuls of broth and great joints of meat out of an enormous pot which was set on the ground between them.

- Niels and the Giants (The Crimson Fairy Book)

[img src]

-----

Intent: To give oneself additional “spoons.”

Ideal Timing: This charm can be made at any time.

Materials:

Spoons

Large Jar

Cotton Balls

Herbs: Hyssop, Rosemary, Thyme, Juniper Berries

When I asked my readers what sort of spells they'd like to see in this second volume of fairytale-inspired spells, one of the most strikingly popular responses was, "Is there a spell to give me more spoons?"

If you're not familiar with the term, "spoons" or spoon theory is a metaphor which describes the reduction in mental and physical energy experienced by people who are disabled or chronically ill, with spoons used as a unit of measurement to represent how energy and motivation must be rationed throughout the day to accomplish necessary tasks. Spoons are only replenished through rest or sleep, so once a person runs out of spoons, that's it for their day. 

The term was coined by Christine Miserandino in her 2003 article "The Spoon Theory," in which she uses dinnerware to demonstrate to a friend how living with invisible chronic illness required careful daily planning and prioritization, and how even with the best intentions and efforts, tasks are often left undone due to a lack of energy or an increase in pain. The term has since been adopted by wide sections of the online community in relation to struggles with disability, chronic illness, or mental health, as a descriptor for daily energy and motivation levels, i.e. "I don't have the spoons for this," or "After a full day at work, I have exactly one spoon left, and I need it for laundry, so going out is off the table."

As someone who regularly battles ADHD, anxiety, executive dysfunction, migraines, and depression, I'm a big fan of spoon theory, largely because it makes those invisible daily struggles, which so many of us have, much easier to visualize and explain. So in honor of all my fellow spoonies, here is a spell to help you gain those critical extra spoons.

For this spell, you'll need a fair-sized jar, some healing herbs, and a bunch of spoons. You can use plastic spoons or metal ones, if you happen to have spare silverware lying around. Use as many or as few spoons as you feel you need. If you need more spoons than can readily be acquired, you might draw or print out pictures or spoons and use those instead.

Place the spoons in the jar with a big handful of cotton balls. Apart from their mundane medical and cosmetic uses, cotton has healing magical properties and also represents the comfort that may feel lacking on low energy or high pain days. If desired, add several pinches of Hyssop, Rosemary, Thyme, and Juniper Berries, or a sachet containing the herbs if you'd rather keep things neat.

Close the jar, give it a big hug, and say:

I bless this jar and spoons And ask for the strength to function; And when I need a helping hand, These extra spoons I'll summon,

Set the jar aside somewhere safe. If desired, you might want to label it. You don't want anyone borrowing your magical spoons for their cereal, after all. When you need an extra boost to help you get through the day, simply open the jar and take out a spoon. You can carry the spoon with you, place it on your altar, or discard it to activate the charm.

Please keep in mind that performing this sort of magic should always be accompanied by appropriate medical and self-care measures. Magic isn't going to cure a chronic illness or permanently alter your brain chemistry. But it can help you cope with the symptoms and give you that all-important push to get yourself through the day. Stay strong, witches!

-from the forthcoming book, The Sisters Grimmoire, Vol. II; © 2021 Bree NicGarran

(If you'd like to check out more fairy-tale spells or any of my other published works, please visit the Willow Wings Witch Shop!)

#A gift for all my readers on my birthday - hope you enjoy! #witchcraft #witchblr #spells #spoonie witch #The Sisters Grimmoire II

[yannaryartside]

Okay. I have doubts and theories.

On Sydney's health issues theory.

So, the spoon theory, the 3 swords heart tattoo, the cabinet full of medicines, the fact that her mom died of lupus, which is a condition that has no cure, you can live with it if managed with medication but makes you more in danger of infections, so you have to live with a certain self-restraint. There may be clues on the show about Sydney dealing with something very serious.

In this scene, in 2x10, many of us thought Sydney was actually reflecting on her fluctuating health. I agree with all of the possible evidence of a serious health issue, but I would like to present my doubts on some parts of that narrative, presented in this scene.

Gifs by riickgrimes.

The first time I saw this scene I thought, "OK, she is saying this because she has never found a boost in the industry, and took a solo adventure and failed, so she wonders if she is even made for all of this. She thinks that the Bear, it's people, and Carmy, is the only environment where she can show what she is made of, and, in her own words, "make a difference." So she is willing to go all or nothing in this one. That is an option for thinking outside the aforementioned context.

Now, if this was a scene about a daughter confessing to his father how she thinks about her mortality because she is sick, it doesn't feel right. Foreshadowing can give clues, but the scenes those clues take place still have to make scenes within a context we may not know about. When we figure out the truth in the future, this scene has to make sense looking back.

So, why is Emmanuel not extremely shaken by his daughter's comment? this is a man who also lost his wife to illness, why doesn't he jump off his chair and hug her and say "Don't worry about it darling, it won't happen, the doctor said..." Sydney (in the way we are interpreting the scene) may have as well said, "Yes Dad, I know I could die tomorrow," and that is quite a statement, as I said, people can live long lives with lupus, so why is she assuming that's not her case? that is a particularly terrifying thought.

So if she is dealing with something that she is afraid will kill her tomorrow, and is talking to her dad about it, I really doubt any father would have reacted in such a nonchalant way, he is calm, and we don't see the concern in his face, or a shadow of restrain because he doesn't want to look worried or afraid. There is a possibility of this scene being incomplete, and editing was done to hide Emmanuel's true reactions from the audience, but I think is unlikely.

Won't Emmanuel be understanding of this tendency of "making everything the thing" if is because of a dangerous illness? I don't think he would even dare to question it. I know at the beginning we see him worried about her overworking, but she has described to him her poor eating habits, and explained why she needed to work so hard. Won't he be more firm about asking her to take her of herself if her heath was that fragile?

So, I would like to present some alternative theories, even though some of them are keep me up at night:

She is sick, but she hasn't told anybody, not even her dad. It may be lupus or another thing. This one scares me a lot, especially if we consider the fact that Sydney has displayed a tendency of not asking for help and running away from forms of affection.

The spoon theory may apply to executive dysfunction related to trauma: we don't know what happened to her, so I would like to keep this option open.

She doesn't know that she is sick: she says "I don't know if I could do another one" in the sense of not making it in the industry, but this is actually a foreshadowing of not knowing her time is running short (please no). I definitely believe that she will give us a scare, some issue that makes her go close to death, she pulls through it, of course, but I see it coming. If it happens right after Carmy and Sydney have "the fight" omg...

She may have survived an accident: I like this one because it could explain the cabinet full of meds, maybe she is still recovering from the damage made to her body, muscle pain, heart-related stuff, who knows. But it also explains her being so conscious about how fragile life is even without any dangerous health issues. She lives all day like it's a gift, not a guarantee, this could explain her "sense of urgency" presented since season 1 (she is anxious to make it on the menu, etc.). This is not a healthy mindset, of course, it's a response to trauma, hence his father not pressing about the comment too much. I also like this idea thematically as well, the idea that a person who thinks life is too fragile will find a partner in a man who lost his brother to suicide, and is probably suicidal himself ("You should be dead", echoing in Carmy's flashbacks, we his chef didn't say that, that's all in Carmy's head). It's like they will be screaming to each other, "Please hold on, to life, to me," Carmy will work on his issues because he wants a life with Sydney and their restaurant's family, and Sydney has found in Carmy's company a new direction in her life, and partnership.

#making theories so I can sleep at night #carmy berzatto #sydney adamu #sydcarmy #emmanuel adamu #Sydney adamu theory #carmy x sydney #spoon theory #the bear #the bear fx #carmen berzatto #sydney x carmy #the bear meta #carmy the bear

[riverofrainbows]

Lately I'm hearing a lot about PDA and autism (PDA = pathological demand avoidance) and it's very good that people become more aware of it and are able to learn more about their own needs. However i often see it framed as like a type of autism, as in PDA autism that's just this thing that happens randomly.

But it isn't just a flavour of autism or something that comes from who-knows-what, it's a trauma response. To having forced yourself to do so much shit that goes against your needs, to feeling like you have to/having to force yourself to do things that go over your capacity, that disregard your needs and do harm to you. Including things where people don't even know their own needs and can't communicate them.

It's a trauma response caused by a lack of autonomy and accommodations (from yourself for whatever reason and your environment). To the point where having to do anything, hearing any demand causes this message of doom to your nervous system

And there is a very simple but not easy solution to it, with the potential of even a cure: Do not force yourself to do anything until your nervous system has healed. Now this is very hard to be able to do, which is the difficult part, because most of us aren't in an environment where we can do that, often have to work etc to survive and don't have people support us for a few years while we do not acquiesce to any demand. Additionally, many of us don't even know how to honor our needs because we trampled all over them for years, were forced to mask them and might not even know what they are or how to recognise them in ourselves.

A possible way to at least some healing of our nervous system is getting to know our needs and working on meeting them better, to try and build down the mask and only conciously use it where necessary but for example not at home or in a safe space, and try to have as many safe spaces to unmask as possible. You might only be able to start while completely alone but even that helps. Another point is decomposition time, soup time as i call it. Where we take however much time we have available, preferably at least a couple days, whenever we can, and do not force ourselves to do anything, even hobbies or getting out of pyjamas, except staying alive, and just drift like driftwood. This also massively helps with autistic burnout.

One additional tipp to recognising our suppressed needs and wants is that when you think "Oh i want this" but immediately shut yourself down: try to recognise this happening and ask yourself "Why can't i do this?" and if you don't have a good reason why not, try doing the thing you want. Might be something as simple as a juice packet or be some leftover rule from childhood. Similar for "I don't look forward to that": if you don't have a reason why you have to do it, and do it exactly this way, consider not doing it. For example you don't have to go to an outing you are very uncomfortable at. You don't have to do the dishes a certain way even tho it's awful sensory wise. Try finding those small impulses and listening to them. It gets easier over time.

This PDA trauma response is also one of the factors of executive dysfunction. Especially for things like when we can't even do our own hobbies or plans we had that we enjoy. Other reasons for executive dysfunction are difficulty transition tasks, sensory issues that make us avoid a task, pending decisions related to the tasks, unknown elements of a task, or not wanting to interrupt the current activity such as listening to music or watching a show (especially since these are big tools for escapism and distraction/coping to keep emotional distress at bay or otherwise aid in emotional regulation).

Btw this whole essay is built on my own experiences, i am not a psychologist or professionally qualified in some other way. So do take this with some critical thinking as my sources are "it's in my head" and we should never take (mental) health advice on the internet without thinking about whether it makes sense and applies to us, and do additional research if any questions or doubts or further thoughts come up.

#own post #if i need to go to the toilet or get a glass of water but i don't want to do it if i have to stop my show then i will just take it with me #even if i watch it on the laptop and not my phone i will just haul the laptop to the bathroom for two minutes #can highly recommend #i have had this issue with forcing myself to do things made so much more poignant because i also became physically disabled but would force #myslef to push through it and hide it from ny surroundings as well. it made me quickly realise my limits tho #and i had the opportunity to not fulfill many demands thanks to my parents and the free time of semester breaks #and unmasking at about the same time #so this whole post speaks from personal experience

[gods-favorite-autistic]

Rtc neurodivergency headcanons:

Ocean isn’t professionally diagnosed because her parents think that smoking weed will somehow cure her autism

Noel was diagnosed when he was five and I feel like his mom started out as one of those mommy bloggers who was like “autism has stolen my son 😭”

She got better don’t worry

Penny is very attached to her doll and loves it to death but if she accidentally touches the fabric on the dolls dress when she’s having a bad sensory day she will yeet that bitch across the room as fast as humanly possible

We stan Mischa our favorite undiagnosed adhd bisexual Ukrainian king

Constance is the one who diagnosed Ocean because like A. She’s been friends with this girl for her entire life and B. She is also autistic

Ricky has a stim that is literally just him signing the word for cat

Ocean and Mischa are the perfect pair during group projects because Ocean has the unlimited energy that she gets out by writing as fast as humanly possible and Mischa just has these bursts of productivity that he uses for the more creative parts of the project

Ocean has a verbal stim that she got from Penny where she just kinda makes a small little “hmm” sound

Noel has a stim where he just kinda…blows on his fingers. Like Ocean will be in the middle of talking and he’ll just kinda…bring his hand in front of his mouth and blow on it

Constance’s mortal enemy is this specific blanket that is brown and has those little fuzzy cotton balls that are like sensory hell

Mischa messes with his phone case as a stim

Penny and Ricky are the least experienced people at masking

“People already think we’re weird, why try to hide it now?”

Ocean almost never stops masking

Like it is so hard to get her relaxed

One time she was having a meltdown in class and the only person who noticed was Noel because she was gripping her dress so tightly that he knuckles looked like pieces of paper

As much as they argue, Noel and Ocean are really good at calming each other down when they’re having a meltdown

They’ll notice the other is in the middle of one during class and then figure out a way to somehow get them both out of class and into a secluded location

Mischa has a very specific set of headphones and a very specific hoodie for whenever his executive dysfunction is at its worst or he’s just having a really bad sensory day

Whenever Ricky’s having a bad day whenever he gets home he makes it his personal goal to pet every single cat in the house because A. It is an impossible task and B. The cats’ fur always sends him to sensory heaven

This either comes out one of three ways:

He gets so caught up in trying to pet all the cats and the difficulty that this task brings that he forgets about his bad day

He gets so distracted in the fluffiness of the kitties that he forgets about his day

He accomplishes the task and is so proud and happy with himself that he forgets why he felt bad in the first place

Ocean came over one day and he could tell she was really wound up so he gave the challenge to her instead

She was later seen running after a very chunky orange kitty throughout the hallways while Ricky rolled behind with the biggest grin on his face

His parents took a picture of that moment that he now has on the wall of his room

Noel has a basket full of stim toys in his room

Sometimes when they have a sleepover at his house there’s like a solid few minutes of just fidget toy noises

They all steal hoodies from Mischa and then proceed to steal Mischa’s hoodies from each other

Constance has a lot of information on a lot of things because she has a new special interest about every month or so

She makes comfort cupcakes when she knows the others are in that place where everything is just too much

One year for her birthday present Constance bought Ocean noise cancelling headphones

Ocean almost sobbed

#tw cursing #cw cursing #feel free to add on if you’d like! #also if the hand blowing thing seems specific that’s because it is. I’m projecting onto these characters and no one can stop me #also the verbal stim thing is something I do as well #ride the cyclone #ride the cyclone musical #maddy says dumb stuff and no one listens #rtc #mischa bachinski #mischa rtc #ocean o'connell rosenberg #noel rtc #ocean rtc #noel gruber #constance rtc #penny rtc #ricky rtc #jane doe rtc #jane doe #penny lamb #ricky potts #constance blackwood #neurodivergence #autism headcanon #adhd headcanon #autism #adhd