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olderthannetfic · 6 months

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https://www.tumblr.com/olderthannetfic/732092052701052929/im-actually-really-really-tired-of-reading-posts?source=share

Ok, so, I'm the transsexual gay anon you're trying to vague.

First off, my ask was inspired by a reblogger from here who claimed that the reason straight men don't enjoy romance novels is because straight men are uncomfortable when women in fiction have agency. Lots of other commenters and rebloggers debunked that idiocy, but any point anon might have had about misogyny in straight men's choice of reading material was undermined when they described all straight men (a group which people like to forget includes trans men) as raging misogynists, instead of discussing a systemic issue in men's choice of reading material, or even talking about misogyny as a cultural problem. (By the way, if your response to this is to turn around and say that straight trans men don't count when you're talking about straight men as a group, the word for that is misgendering)

So, lets take your post point by point.

1.) I never said that male privilege isn't real, you're the one who made that up.

2.) it's possible to discuss systemic issues like the wage gap without pretending that trans men always have exactly the same male privilege as cis men, AND without pretending that they aren't men. You are correct to point out that privilege is not exactly identical for every single person, but ignoring that trans and gay people exist is not actually good praxis.

3.) "men don't have to take precautions against strangers of the opposite sex potentially assaulting them whereas women learn to do this from an early age" You forgot to slap "cis" on there. This is an accurate (if broad) statement about cis people. I grew up having to worry about the same exact things a cis girl worries about. The fact that I identify as a man and pass well today does not retroactively shield me from gendered violence or harassment back when everyone who saw me thought I was a teenage girl. Also, homophobic violence exists and men (cis or trans, straight or not!) who don't conform to their culture's standards of masculinity have to watch out for it, often to the same extent that women need to watch out for misogynist violence.

4.) no one asked you to pretend that cis men have it worse than trans lesbians, you made that up.

5.) Honestly, anon, the fact that you think that LGBT men like myself are insignificant and that our feelings don't matter tells me everything I need to know about you as a person (and very little about your political ideologies).

6.) you're right, it isn't about me. It's about systemic problems. Demonising an entire gender does not solve systemic problems. Transphobia and homophobia are also systemic problems, and overlap a great deal with misogyny (I've heard it argued that all three are actually the same thing directed at different people). You can't solve one while pretending the others don't matter.

7.) You're right! Trans men who don't pass are subject to the same crap that cis women are! You outright stating that their feelings about this don't matter doesn't help anyone, no, not even cis women.

6.) Acutally, "all men are scum" is radfem rhetoric, no matter if you allow trans men to be scum or try to define us out of manhood.

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midnight-battiness · 4 months

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Pelipper Mail: A visceral nightmare. It's not yours. You get it anyway.

[//CONTENT WARNINGS: Parental abuse (physical and emotional), emotional manipulation, Pokemon abuse/death, misgendering, transphobia. Skip if you're sensitive to anything here.]

Grief. Rage. Fear. Your mother's twisted features loom above you. Her expression is unreadable, yet you know that look. You know it far too well.

You look down. You know why you feel grief. A broken egg with a half-developed Bug-type in its ruined shell. An Eevee whose silver fur has been stained red. A Flareon with a pained expression, staring lifelessly, pleading for you to make it stop. To help her. To save them. A Bounsweet with sap leaking from her side, gazing off into the distance.

You look to Her side. You know why you feel rage. A Joltik in her hand, held in a painfully tight grip. Squeezing.

"You're a fucking gross-ass [REDACTED], you have any idea how fucking sick of your shit I am? First the hair, then the shit you pulled in class, now playing with these fucking disgusting pests?"

You plead with Her. Tell Her to stop. Beg Her. She does not listen. The Joltik squeals in pain. You can't look, but you can't bring yourself to stop watching. The cries grow strained.

Crunch.

"You've been pulling this shit with me since you were five. When are you gonna get it through that little [REDACTED] skull of yours that you're not a boy, you're never gonna BE a boy, and you can't fucking FORCE yourself into being a boy! All of this shit's getting on my last nerve, you KNOW how much I fucking hate this! Every single time you pull shit like this it's traumatizing! I'm TRAUMATIZED with all the shit not just that you pulled, but that I've had to deal with from EVERYONE ELSE for you, you ungrateful shit!"

You squint your eyes shut, choking out a sob. You know why you feel fear. You've felt what's coming. You know. The sting on your cheek is still fresh from earlier. You try to hide, but your arm is pulled away from your face by the wrist. The sting flares. Again. Again. Again. Her nails swipe at the raw flesh, staining the faux-claws crimson. Not that you can bring yourself to open your eyes.

The tap of heels punctuates the end of the nightmare, as do your cries of both agony and despair. You cannot open your eyes. You cannot bring yourself to look. To see what she did to them. To you.

You awaken with a cold, painful chill down your spine.

Mom...? Mom, you don't have to do this! Please, stop! Stop! I didn't do anything bad this time, I swear! I'll be good this time! Please, please just STOP--

[It wasn't until then that Stephanie had fully come to her senses, finding herself alone amongst her sleeping teammates. Her heart was pounding, and her vines were subconsciously released from the yellow tabs on her neck, as a shaky last-ditch form of self defense.]

...I-I... I can't. I'm going to get caught. She's going to find me, and it'll all be over. Someone else is going to suffer because of me. Me, my stupid freakin' status, my stupid family... And there's nothing I can do about it.

[She tightly clutched her blanket, letting out what felt like a small pool's worth of tears. Her guilt was almost too much for her to handle.

She sobbed into the vast darkness of the night, letting out the occasional hiccup.]

...Why am I even here? All I've done was cause problems! A-And now, I'm going to pay for it... I should've known it was going to happen eventually.

...I can't stay here... I can't... I-I can't...

#snivyposting #pokemon #pkmn irl #pokemon irl #pokeblogging #rotomblr #snivy #tw transphobia #tw child abuse #tw abuse #tw death #tw slur #ooc: Talk about an alley-oop from the last post #ooc: And congratulations!#ooc: You've successfully gaslit Stephanie!

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joligarcon · 1 year

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i cant possibly go over every single thing that bothers me about the whole hogwarts legacy debacle but one of the most annoying and hurtful things about it is the way cis people are seemingly incapable of Not making it about themselves and whether they are Good or Bad people for buying the game and playing it. like has it ever occurred to them that not everything in the world is about them? that maybe its not about whether they get to be Good People and feel like Good People or whether they are Ontologically Evil No Matter What? that maybe i have better things to do then to waste my fucking time and energy reassuring them that they are Good or convincing them that they are Bad? that maybe just maybe this is about the IMPACT of what they are doing when they line the pockets of one of the most notorious transphobes in recent history and help her maintain cultural relevancy by continuing to engage with her creative property? because yeah, when you do that, you ARE contributing to a culture of transphobia, and you ARE complicit, because JKR isn't some rando celebrity with views that happen to be problematic, she is literally using her money and influence to empower shitheads who have the means to strip us of our human rights, and to normalize their transphobia as well as that of the public who remains passive and complicit at best. and if me saying that makes you feel guilty or like i'm calling you a bad person, maybe sit down and reflect on it for a bit. because what you're experiencing is called cognitive dissonance and it's not my fucking problem to deal with. and if you're still going to play the game in spite of all of that, at LEAST have the decency to do it in secrecy and shame and not come begging your trans friends and acquaintances for validation that youre still Totally A Good Ally uwu because i promise you we don't care to listen to you justify why the nazi terf game is Fine Actually and that youre Totally Engaging With It Non-Problematically we really truly dont. trans people aren't the catholic church, we aren't here to give out indulgences. so either play another game or fuck off.

all of this applies to your jewish pals too btw, they don't want to hear about it either. because yeah, apparently it wasn't enough for JKR to be a terf, she also had to be a raging antisemite to spice things up!!

i dealt with cognitive dissonance and a LOT of guilt before i went vegan so it's not like i don't know what thats like. but you know what i did? i boycotted animal products instead of making it everybody's problem. i was privileged enough to have the option not to fund animal abuse so i stopped doing it. and i'm not saying i'm a bastion of animal rights and good virtue, quite the contrary. i know i'm not actually doing anything amazing by simply Eating Different Food, but that's kind of my point. even with just that the stakes were much higher than with a video game boycott- i had to give up the food that had kept me alive for 20 years. whereas with a video game there are NO stakes at all, you're not actually sacrificing anything by not playing it but yall cant even fucking do that. you don't need any level of privilege whatsoever to partake in the boycott and yet. it just makes me think yall are the absolute lousiest people on earth if you cant even bring yourselves to do 1/10th of the lousy stuff ive been doing for other causes because "but my childhood uwu"

it hurts so much because it feels like betrayal. or rather thats straight up what it is. thing whole thing sheds an ugly, ugly light on the pervasiveness of performative allyship and it makes me think the future of the trans rights movement is looking bleak as FUCK if all our supposed "allies" are willing to abandon us over a video game. a fucking video game.

and maybe some people just dont realize the extent to which JKR has a direct impact on the state of human rights for trans people and they think shes just a kooky problematic fave but i don't think that's an excuse either because we have been SCREAMING at you guys for YEARS about what kind of person she is and what she does so at this point if you're still not aware it's like, where the fuck have you been?

i just. i just cant wait until the day we move on from harry potter as a society and let it and JKR fade into obscurity forever. im sick and tired of having to hear and talk about her.

#wow this ended up way longer than i intended sorry. i just have many thoughts and feelings #also had a really rough week so. :(

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heartisamusclethesizeofyourfist · 2 years

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tell me the ana mardoll discourse 👀

Oh, that really sucked. Lengthy rant incoming, because this is one of those discourses that sucks up about six different issues and tangles them all up, and it continues to nag away at me in all sorts of ways. I've been trying to find a way to write about it here for a while, and it's been rattling around unproductively in my head, so I appreciate you providing me the spur to finally do it... maybe this will be the thing that finally lets me stop worrying at it. I suspect the tone's going to be all over the place.

So, about a month or so back, Ana Mardoll, a prominent social justice commentator on Twitter, turns out to be working for Lockheed Martin. Cue an absolute screaming flood of people delighted to see him knocked off his supposed moral high ground (like, huge amounts of glee, that don't quite feel in keeping with their supposed concern about the victims of Lockheed Martin weaponry)...

Because here's the thing; Mardoll gets people's backs up in the way people who talk about social justice stuff often do, but also for reasons that include ableism and transphobia and just sheer aesthetic distaste for how he expresses himself about his identities (idk, that was cited weirdly often in the celebrations of his downfall; it's bad enough to work for arms makers, but if you work for arms makers and you're a bit twee then God help you).

It also wasn't independent of the increasing backlash against neurodivergent people and the confidence we've gained as a community in talking about our stuff publicly. I'd noticed for ages that a lot of people moaned about him in terms that suggested his Twitter presence caused them significant ongoing rage, yet somehow they couldn't bring themselves to use the mute or block tools to free themselves from the sight of him. There was a lot of hate reading going on, is what I'm thinking.

But most of all, the people enjoying his reputation getting tanked tended to skate over the (well known and constantly referenced) fact that his job only came out when he got doxxed by a noted hate site as part of a lengthy saga of transphobic harassment (they'd gone after his family, even) - i.e. the people currently chasing keffals around the world, and who spend their time targeting autistic and trans people for harassment and - sometimes successfully - baiting them into suicide.

Normally left wing people are against doxxing, and against this website full of TERFs, Nazis and generally dodgy people, but re: Mardoll they were falling over themselves to ignore their principles, which was ironic because they were mad at him for ignoring his own principles. And of course that must've been a huge win for the hate site, as it showed them that if they picked a hated enough target, they'd get very little blowback, at least from cis people .

Moreover, the rush to cancel Mardoll on Twitter employed a great deal of ableist rhetoric which felt horribly familiar from the past decade-plus of UK media/Tory discourse on disability, work and benefits.

Basically, the Twitterati instantly assumed everything Mardoll was saying about his limited capacity for work, struggles finding suitable work, general income and financial stability was fake, and in the light of that assumption, they also tore to shreds things about him that were contextually unsurprising for a part-time working, disabled, self-published writer, i.e. his having a few income streams such as a Ko-fi, publishing stuff, and indeed crowdfunding for mortgage payments. There was a general assumption that he must be loaded, with self-publishing used to claim both that he was a failure and that he was raking in the cash.

They also made up daft strings of illogic, like "he says 'boy' in his profile; a boy is under 20 and therefore he is doing a massive con where he's posing as a nineteen-year-old" - which was a trip to read as an older Millennial who remembers Mardoll being a prominent early-2010s feminist blogger (and not being six years old at the time). That's easily verified with Google, but people were too perversely hungry for the situation to be somehow worse than "social justice guy works for an arms maker" to bother doing so.

And maybe everyone's worst suspicions about Mardoll are right; maybe I'm being desperately naive here. But I do know that people have been conditioned to think that disabled people are lying about work/money stuff, and they had no interest in considering how that default atmosphere of suspicion and condemnation around disabled people and work as a subject might well have made it harder for him to reach out to his online networks about seeking less morally compromising work . Or in the fact that the way the conversation was playing out was making a ton of other disabled people feel it was unsafe for us to speak about our own work or financial situations.

And c) surprise surprise, leftist Twitter then turns on disabled people when we point out that it's already bad enough the guy works for LM, but as he's highlighted that family connections were the only way he'd been able to get part-time, work-from-home gig that paid enough, then maybe there needs to be a bit of nuance in how we talk about this, and could they please bring this level of energy to actually improving material conditions of disabled people?

Don't get me wrong; I don't want to absolve Mardoll of working for flipping Lockheed Martin for fifteen entire years. I think there's definite questions a lot of us need to ask ourselves about what we're prepared to compromise on morally for our livelihoods, and for how long, and whether we're really as completely stuck as we think we are, or there might be chinks of light and possibility and it's only that the traumas of surviving an ableist world have beaten out of us the capacity to trust in them. (I know, like a lot of disabled people, a thing or two about feeling stuck.)

I found it disingenuous how people were ignoring that these questions of ethics in the job market bite disabled people a hell of a lot harder and more quickly than they do abled people, and it was so clear to me that the way it exploded on Twitter was incredibly counterproductive and 75% about the lulz/snark for a lot of people.

Treating Mardoll as the Absolute Worst also doesn't sit right to me when so many people on both sides of the Atlantic are government workers: how do you decide how much better working for a government with policies that do harm at home and abroad is than licensing software for an arms manufacturer, as Mardoll has been doing? Is it ever morally acceptable to work in HR for the DWP, given their persecution of disabled people? What about being an admin assistant at an asylum seeker detention centre? Are your hands clean if you profit from providing goods or services to the Tory MPs who devote their lives to policies that are killing people? Might a lot of people in fact need this stuff to be discussable?

And people really didn't want to know when we pointed out that, while fifteen years of being unable to get anything else does raise questions, ableist recruitment practices are incredibly common, many workplaces fail to offer disability accommodations, and it costs more to be disabled to start with.

Having watched at close range as disabled loved ones stuck for many years with employers that treated them like shit, because chucking the job in felt too risky, I don't find Mardoll's decision to sit tight all that surprising. Of course there are disabled people who courageously cling to their principles no matter what the personal cost, but the cost the bear will be a damn sight steeper than it would be for a non-disabled person, and that doesn't make them extra principled, it just makes this ableist world extra shit.

And the refusal to explore those questions when Twitter had recently spent months discussing recent US labour relations upheavals (for perspective, someone recently was said to have been digging for dirt on whoever runs the Jorts account), the politicisation of work-from-home arrangements, the risks to disabled people forced back into workplaces/universities/schools in person, trans healthcare being under threat, the more general healthcare costs/access mess in the US, the medical risks for women and AFAB people of living/working in certain states after the fall of Roe...

On my timeline, there was also a lot of Extremely Sudden Concern About Weaponry and Colonialism from British lefties who I had never once seen give a flying fuck about colonialism's equally real outworkings right here on their doorstep, i.e. Boris Johnson's ongoing efforts to absolve the British army of their Troubles atrocities, the disproportionate harm being done to Northern Ireland by Brexit, or the fact we literally don't have a functioning Executive right now: indeed, that's a common enough problem in Northern Ireland that this website exists:

https://HowLongHasNorthernIrelandNotHadAgovernment.com/

It was revealing to watch Twitter lefties well-actuallying disabled people about all the deaths and disabilities Lockheed Martin weapons have caused like that was some sort of gotcha; like nobody with a Twitter account could possibly have grown up in a conflict zone, or been disabled in a bombing, or live in a place where bombings and shootings still happen.

Like none of us lives in a place with a complicated peace, with the UK's highest rates of physical disabilities/chronic illnesses and mental health problems, of unemployed disabled people, and with suicides among kids who don't even remember the conflict, all problems you can't untangle from the fact this is a post-conflict society where social progress was stunted for so long. A place where the writer of that last piece was herself murdered a few years ago, because it still fucking happens in peacetime. Because the violence hasn't really gone away, not entirely. And nor has the violence of the state.

Anyway, that's why I can't get the Ana Mardoll discourse out of my head.

#a saga #tw: ableism #tw: transphobia #tw: suicide #replies to asks #the discourse

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mothra-obeyme · 4 years

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Feel free to ignore if it makes you uncomfortable- but maybe the demon brothers reacting to finding out that MC is intersex? I'm gender fluid and have changed my name but a lot of my family rejects me, including my parents. and it's hurting me a bit right now. So maybe some comfort headcanons? Only if you're comfortable.

It's alright it doesn't make me uncomfortable. Don't worry.

I made the MC nonbinary but i use it as an umbrella term so i hope that's alright

I also didn't know if you meant them finding out you're nonbinary or intersex because intersex has to do with the X and Y chromosons and biology so i just used nonbinary because i didn't know what you meant 😅

The Brothers finding out that you're nonbinary

When you first came into the Devildom you didn't tell the brothers you're nonbinary because you were scared they would reject you like your family did. A few weeks later when you were more comfortable with them you decided to tell them that you're nonbinary.

Undateables Version

!Warnings: Transphobia, Swearing!

Lucifer

"I'm very proud of you that decided you feel safe enough to tell me something as important as that. I accept you for who you are no matter your gender and if anybody doesn't then tell me and i will take care of them."

Lucifer also asks you which pronouns you use and you will never see him using something different and when he does accidentally not use the right pronouns he won't make a big deal out of it knowing that you want him to cause a scene

But you still have to explain it a little bit more to him to make him understand your situation better because he doesn't know much about genderqueernes

When you at one point decide to tell him about how your family rejects you for being nonbinary and doesn't use the right pronouns he will be very mad because how could someone be such an ignorant b*tch

Will go to visit them and have a talk with them

Will also ask Diavolo if you can go back to the Devildom if they're still rude to you after Lucifer had a talk with them

When you have a gender crisis and you don't know where to go for comfort you can always come to him. He will be there for you no matter how bad you feel.

Will also ask which petnames you're comfortable with and which not

If you're usually wearing a binder he will ask you if you at some point want to get top surgery and if you don't and are comfortable with wearing binders he's going to make sure you're not wearing them for too long

Mammon

When you told him that you're nonbinary he was confused at first and maybe sounded a bit rude because he didn't know what you meant

But he didn't really meant it to sound rude so when you explain it to him he understands what you mean

"You thought i would reject you, didn't you. Well jokes on you i'm the great Mammon so of course i'll accept you!"

Will ask for your pronouns as soom as he has to use them he's like:

"So then . . . wait are you using the other things like ... fuck what it is it called like with the she/him/they thing...."

"Do you mean pronouns?"

"Yes! Those which are you using?"

If you decided to tell him first and he finds out about it he's gonna be so happy inside but will act as if it's nothing

When he finds out about your parents rejecting you, not using your right pronouns and misgendering you he's really mad and he swore he will protect you with his life

So your parents should watch out because Mammon may not be the most intelligent out of his brothers but he's still the 2nd Strongest and really fast

Also gets really protective whenever someone is being rude to you and purposely misgenders you

Leviathan

With him being on the internet so much he already knows which genders there are and how to be respectful to members of the LGBTGIA+ community

So when you told him your nonbinary he was very understanding and also didn't make a big deal out of it because he thinks that people shouldn't have to come out and that it's a normal thing to be queer or genderqueer

Is also making sure to comfort you whenever you have body dysphoria and don't like your body

When searching for games to play with you he will do his best with choosing games that are nonbinary inclusive or where you don't have to give your gender

Is also understanding when you find a term you're more comfortable to be called

When you told him about your parents he got really mad and wanted to end them right away so you made sure to calm him down

Will try and convince Lucifer to let you stay here because if you're gone he's gonna be alone and you're more safe here then with your toxic parents

Will death glare at everyone who misgenders you or uses the wrong pronouns

Satan

I think he already knows the basics about being genderqueer so when you told him hoping he wouldn't reject you he was making sure to tell you he still accepts you and you being nonbinary doesn't change that

After you described your gender more to him he will search for books about it to make sure he understands you better and knows how to be respectful

Asking about your pronouns will also one of the first things he does and if he uses the wrong pronoun once he will make sure to apologise

If you're struggling with your gender and body dysphoria is getting to much he will make sure to give you a hug or cuddle and comfort you

At first he may not know how to do it but he will get better at it will ask you how to help you and will read the books he can find about it

Also when he finds out about the way your family treats you he's going to be mad as fuck like you're not able to hold him back Lucifer and Beel are literally pulling him back from trying to kill your parents as brutal as possible

After you managed to calm him down he will try everything he can do to let you stay here and you not having to go back to your family

I don't even want to talk about what he does when someone purposely misgenders you and uses the wrong pronouns like you don't want to know what happens to them

Asmodeus

He's probably also one of the brothers who's educated on that subject so when you tell him that you're intersex he's completely understanding and makes sure that you know that

Will also ask for your pronouns and ask if any petnames he regularly uses makes you uncomfortable in any way and if they do he'll stop using them

Supports any clothing you're comfortable wearing

You feel comfortable wearing a skirt even if you identify as nonbinary ? Hell yeah he supports that

I think he's also someone that thinks clothing doesn't have a gender and everybody can wear what they want

Oh boy when he finds out about your parents

When you told him he has that sweet smile on his face but you know he has so much rage in him right now

And with that smile he will have a talk with your parents and will call out everything that's wrong about them (ex: that they have no style; their bad skin etc.)

And after that he will try and force Diavolo to let you stay here with him because he's way too alone without you and he needs your affection

If anyone is being rude to you in public and is being a transphobic idiot he'll be like

"Hey honey can you hold my bag for a second?"

And then kick that demon right in the face yes not punching because he doesn't want his hands to get dirty or accidentally break one of his nails

Oh and he will completely destroy their confidence and will make them cry

Beelzebub

When he you told him that you're nonbinary he got realy confused because he didn't know what it meant

But after a while of explaining it to him he began to understand it and also accepted you immediately because he's boyfriend material

You do have to tell him to use other pronouns because he doesn't really know that your old one don't quite fit anymore

But he's very willing to learn more about genderqueernes and overall being queer and will try his best to make you as comfortable as possible

If you wear a binder and he saw you wearing one for the first time he'll get a little concerned and will ask if it's healthy but when you tell him that it's alright if you don't wear it for too long he's pretty chill

But he will make sure you're not wearing it for too long because he wants you to be healthy

Whenever you struggle with something be it body dysphoria or people being rude to you and transphobic he will intimidate them and make sure they will go away

When they're away he will ask if he can hug you and ask if you're alright

When he heard about your parents not accepting you he will be very angry and Beel is scary when angry but he'll be so sorry if he scared you

He just doesn't know how your own family can be so unaccepting and toxic

He will try his best at convincing Diavolo to let you stay here

He will be a little confused if you wear a skirt but when you tell him that you think clothes have no gender he's like

'Wait. Yeah that's completely true i should've realised that sooner.'

And will compliment you no matter what you wear or what's your style because he likes if you feel good about yourself no matter your clothes or gender

Belphegor

"You're nonbinary? Cool. What pronouns do you use?"

Like he'll be so casual about it you're like 'Wait i thought this would go different.'

He doesn't know everything about gender queerness but that doesn't mean he doesn't accept you

I don't think he really cares about gender he cares about your personality and if you're comfortable to sleep on and cuddle with

Will death glare at everyone who's being mean or transphobic and if they still don't stop he's not above beating someone up

Yes he may be lazy but he still hates when someone makes you feel bad

If you wear a binder he'll make sure to remind you to not wear it for too long

When he found out about your parents he was like

"Maybe killing humans is okay. You just have to kill the right ones."

Like you have to try your best to stop him from ending your parents life as soon as possible

I think he would buy you a blanket or pillow with the nonbinary flag on it because why not

He probably also thinks gender is a social construct and that you can wear whatever you want as long as you feel comfortable

Also gives you little compliments over day they may sometimes be a little weird but he's trying his best

"You're comfortable to sleep on no matter your gender."

Please reblog

Masterlist

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me lucifer #obey me scenarios #obey me mammon #obey me headcanons #obey me asmodeus #shall we date #obey me leviathan #obey me levi #obey me satan #obey me beel #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphie #obey me belphegor #nonbinary #obey me x mc

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sheathandshear · 3 years

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Thinking a lot recently about that essay by the anon trans woman who decided to stay in the closet and not transition in large part due to the raging misandry coming from her supposed allies and in-group and just... I'm coming at things from the opposite direction, but in this time of contemplating some kind of transition, the sheer amount of transphobia from cis people on one side and misandry from trans people and their "allies" on the other feels like being caught between Scylla and Charybdis, and the vicious passive aggression from people who claim to love and support you is a lot harder to deal with than plain old ignorance and prejudice from people who don't. ♡♡♡#TransWomenAreWomen♡♡♡ but also #YesAllMen and #AllMenAreTrash. Trans people are sacred, and moobs and neckbeards and body odor and receding hairlines and tiny penises (and everything else that T gives people if they're not genetically fortunate) are ugly and funny and worthy of mockery. Genital preference is transphobic, and also all relationships with men are unhappy and abusive, and who would ever be with a man when they could have a girlfriend or a wife? Clothing doesn't have a gender, but binary wl-men who dress femme are appropriating nonbinary identities so that they can trick women into having sex with them. Sisters not cisters, but no one ever asks about the brothers. Always toxic masculinity, never toxic femininity. We love and support trans people and then laugh about how all men are trash, but of course we're not talking about you specifically, because we love and support trans people (and obviously you're not really a man, you can never truly be a man, and even if you could why would you ever want to be, because there's nothing redeeming about them), so why aren't you laughing with us? It's hate the sin love the sinner, wrapped up in a trans pride flag. And I'm not going to cast aspersions on anyone's gender identity, god knows mine is complicated enough too, but I wonder... how many afab nonbinaries and genderqueers and transmascs and demiboys and trans-"boys"-in-their-20s would be trans men if their own communities didn't constantly talk about how they hate men so goddamn much?

#trans #nonbinary #transmisandry #gender #masculinity

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gay-jesus-probably · 3 years

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Bisexuality didn't "feel right" as a label because you're biphobic and will do anything to distance yourself from bisexuality. Get well soon, the bi community will be here when you're ready.

Are you the raging homophobe anon back for round two or a new guy? ...It doesn’t really matter, you people are all the same.

If you are the same anon, then now I’m extra pissed off at you because do you have any idea how difficult it is to make fun of your messages? You’re making this really hard for me. First you send a five word ask declaring me a homophobe with no details, and it took a lot of thinking to come up with a vaguely funny response to such a lackluster prompt. You’re a really bad improv partner.

And now you send me this shit. Sorry everybody, no jokes today, now I’m actually just fucking furious.

Let me tell you a story, anon. When I was an innocent little twelve year old back in the far of reaches of 2011, I first discovered Tumblr, and soon enough I was learning about different genders and sexualities, and began exploring my own identity. As you already know since you’re sarcastically quoting me talking about my own fucking feelings, I’d been having a minor sexuality crisis for several years at that point, since gay, straight and bisexual were the only label I’d known before then, and none of them fit me. Despite me trying all of them. Multiple times. You condescending piece of shit.All this was resolved by me stumbling across a post defining pansexuality, and that being the first and only sexual identity that’s ever actually felt right for me. It clicked instantly, and has continued to be my sexuality for literally a decade now.

But back when I first started entering the queer community, pansexuality was actually pretty controversial. So was bisexuality. The two were just lumped together actually, because according to the exclusionists back then, bi/pan people are attracted to the opposite sex, and therefor are basically just straight. Actually they rarely cared enough to bother differentiating between bisexual and pansexual people, they just lumped us all in together as a bunch of heteros pretending to be gay for attention and oppressing the real gays. What a bunch of special fucking snowflakes, pretending to be gay for attention. So there I was, a twelve year old queer kid with a brand new identity, being welcomed by a bunch of exclusionists angrily yelling about how I was definitely just a hetero faking it for attention, and being pansexual was Wrong and Bad. But it was okay, because the exclusionists knew better than me. They knew how I really felt, and what my real identity was. They could fix me. I just had to agree with everything they said and become the person they decided I was supposed to be.

I didn’t do that.

Let’s jump forward a few years. I was older, and still perfectly confident in my identity as a pansexual. I hadn’t considered any other parts of my identity. Why would I? I just never really thought much about gender. Then shortly after my fourteenth birthday, I watched a short film online about a trans boy figuring out his identity and working up the courage to come out to his mother. I don’t remember what it was called or most of the details. All I remember was the last scene where the boy and his mother got into an argument about him not feminine enough, which ended with him screaming that he wasn’t a girl. And then I unexpectedly burst into tears because neither was I.

So that was a fun surprise. Once I pulled through that unexpected sobbing breakdown in the middle of the night and re-evaluated my entire life, I realized that yeah. I really wasn’t a girl. I wasn’t a boy either. Fortunately by then I knew that nonbinary people were a thing, so I had plenty of options. I spent awhile feeling things out and experimenting with different labels and pronouns before finally settling on agender and they/them pronouns. Which was great! I felt better than ever, and was confident that I had my identity down and everything would be fine. But everything was not fine. Because I’d been so happy about the biphobia dying down that I hadn’t quite noticed the exclusionists switching targets. Now the nonbinary people were lying. What a bunch of special fucking snowflakes, pretending to be queer for attention. The ones who wanted to medically transition were declared to actually be poor confused trans people who couldn’t get over their internalized transphobia to accept their True Identities. And the rest of us... well, we were just a bunch of cishet special snowflakes playing at being trans for attention, and oppressing the real trans people. I wasn’t agender. I was a cis girl making up fake identities for attention, and calling myself nonbinary was Wrong and Bad. But it was okay, because the exclusionists knew better than me. They knew how I really felt, and what my real identity was. They could fix me. I just had to agree with everything they said and become the person they decided I was supposed to be.

I didn’t do that.

Step forward a few more years, now to eighteen year old me. There’s no dramatic revelations or long struggles this time, just a slow realization. Because I’d been single for years, and I wasn’t bothered by that. I actually enjoyed it. Marriage didn’t sound very appealing. Neither did dating. I’d dated people before, but I wasn’t sure if I actually wanted to; it was just... the thing I was supposed to do. I found people attractive, sure. But I hadn’t wanted to flirt with anyone. Actually, now that I was thinking about it, had I ever felt romantically attracted to anyone? I didn’t even want romance in fiction! So I experimented. Went on some dates just in case age made it more appealing (it didn’t). Began calling myself aromantic, and was pleasantly surprised to find that the longer I used it, the better it felt. It was right.

But once again, the exclusionists were back and even angier than ever. Because now aphobia was in full swing. After all, asexuality wasn’t really queer. It’s just not having sex! It’s basically straight! What a bunch of special fucking snowflakes, pretending to be queer for attention. And the aromantics, oh the aromantics who weren’t asexual were even worse. Because everyone knows that love is what makes us human. How could someone not feel romance? Us aro people weren’t just lying about our identities, we were pretending to not have feelings so that we could get away with using people for sex without commitment. Being aro meant I was an abusive sex crazed monster taking advantage of all the poor innocent allo’s. I wasn’t aromantic. I was a sexual predator making up a fake identity to take advantage of people, and even though I wasn’t actually sleeping around calling myself aro was Bad and Wrong. But it was okay, because the exclusionists knew better than me. They knew how I really felt, and what my real identity was. They could fix me. I just had to agree with everything they said and become the person they decided I was supposed to be.

And I didn’t fucking do that.

Look. I’ve been here for a very long time, and I have dealt with so many versions of exclusionist bullshit. Every aspect of my identity has been met with random fucking strangers online smugly informing me that I was wrong about myself and they were right. And that’s just the ones that wanted me to pretend to be something else; about half of the exclusionists didn’t make any attempts at conversion therapy, and instead skipped straight to suicide baiting. I’m not even getting into the actual homophobes I’ve had to deal with, or the TERF’s that have come after me under the assumption that I’m a trans woman. My point is, I’m pretty fucking used to this sort of thing.

This just hurts a little more, because like I said earlier, the first round of exclusionism I faced was just expanded biphobia. And the bi/pan community banded together in the face of that. We weren’t the exact same identities, but we were being treated the same, and we were similar enough that nobody really minded the difference. It was wonderful. Bi and pan people were a tightly knit group, and that was a sense of community I desperately needed when I was young. I’ve been seeing this coming for awhile. There’s been increasing amounts of bi people getting drawn in by exclusionist bullshit, and I’ve seen anti-pansexual sentiment growing. I just... really hoped it wouldn’t get this far. It’s sad, y’know? It feels like losing an old friend. I’m really disappointed that you think trying to force people out of their community is right. It’s fucking pathetic, and I hope that someday you’ll rediscover basic compassion and realize how much damage you’re doing to yourself and others. This sort of thing doesn’t help the bisexual community. It drives people away. It’s like the damage that TERF’s have done to the lesbian community; this sort of thing poisons the whole well. I hope you re-evaluate what you’re doing and find a more healthy mindset.

...But also at the same time: Who the fuck do you think you are? Take your condescending bullshit and shove it directly up your ass you fucking waste of oxygen. How the fuck dare you. Do you realize the fucking audacity it takes to claim to know someone's identity better than they do? You self centered egotistical douchebag. Your parents should feel ashamed for having raised such an utter failure of a human being. I’d tell you to go fuck yourself, but I can already tell you beat off twice a day to how fucking clever you think you are. If you ever darken my inbox again you’d better be damn sure you keep it anonymous, because if I find you I’ll kick your fucking teeth in, you smug piece of shit.

#i spent like two hours on this lmaoooo #no regrets tho this is some damn fine writing

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