#tw child abuse

[withered--s0uls]

More Trans Varian stuff?? DEPRESSING ASS HC FOR PRISON TIME

Varian not being allowed to keep his self made binder in the dungeons, so he binds with bandages.

If we go with the common fic interpretation that Varian was mistreated by guards in prison, he specifically uses bandages intended for his injuries to bind instead.

Varian invented binders in Tangled-verse btw I don't make the rules.

#trans varian #vat7k #tts #rta #rta varian #tts Varian #vat7k Varian #tw unsafe binding #unsafe binding #tw abuse #tw child abuse #binding with bandages #varian the alchemist #varian vanguard #headcanons

[aspd-culture]

Welcome back. You’re very informative.

I’m very confused about how numerous people, from you, to other antisocial people speaking from their experiences (some of which I learned are actually friends) to prosocial researchers of ASPD say that antisocial people see relationships as transactional. It’s not weird that you guys see it that way, it’s more like “and prosocials… don’t???” Because I’m certain I’m prosocial. I’m neurodivergent, sure, but no signs of ASPD. So, how do most prosocial people typically view relationships if they’re not transactional?

So I find prosocials and pwASPD both tend to think “but doesn’t everybody” when we hear this - it’s a super undescriptive term - but we’re thinking different things define something as transactional. We also see the reason for that transaction to be different.

From a prosocial generally, they’ll mean “I only want to be around people that ‘don’t drain my energy’, that don’t just take take take, that we mutually enjoy the friendship/relationship and want to be around each other”. That’s kinda their definition of getting something out of it, and they want everyone to get something out of it. If they’re draining you, they want you to be free of it so you can be happy, and the transactions involved can be purely emotional/vibes. The reason they feel this way is a desire for positive and enjoyable social connection; the consequence for an uneven/bad/missing transaction is discomfort and wasting their time in negative experiences and generally feeling bad in association with that person.

PwASPD see those transactions very very literally. There’s no vibes nor emotions in the transactions, those are either a reaction to the transaction or a bonus. We mean that we are getting something tangible or practical out of it. Rides, help with things we can’t or don’t want to do alone, sex, maybe even the social relief from the annoyance of “why don’t you ever talk to anyone?” coming from all sides. We also don’t always care if it’s even on the other person’s end. If they’re ok driving me everywhere/if they do it and don’t say or show they’re uncomfortable, then I will assume they are fine with that piece of the transaction. If I’m taking more than I’m giving and they seem chill with that then I’ll accept it. However, I won’t give them *nothing* and that’s because of our reason for transactions - it’s dangerous otherwise. First off, I have shit I need I can’t get myself as much as it sucks, so I need to be around people. But if we need something from them, what we learned in our childhoods is that we don’t get that for free. There’s always something over your head. A lot of pwASPD had friends or caregivers that would hold favors or even *basic, legally-mandated caregiving* over our heads as though we didn’t deserve it. Often our value was determined as a child by what we provided, and since children can’t provide much, we were worthless and not deserving of good treatment.

This is part of the reason (TW non-descriptive CSA mention, skip to the next paragraph if you want) that people thought ASPD was directly correlated with CSA for a long time - many cases of long term CSA come from either “I’ll give you x/do x for you if you help me with this” or worse, doing something first then saying “but I gave you X!/did X for you! I wouldn’t have if I knew you’d act like this”, often call us selfish if we tried to say no and maybe get aggressive or forceful after, and that is an easy lead-in to our view of interactions.

So a lot of us see it that if we want to be safe/know we can continue to get what we need, we HAVE to be giving them something. If you claim you like being around me “just to be around me” or worse that you’re willing to do something for me “just because I want to”, that’s not safe. You want something from me and I’ll give it to you - just tell me what it is. If you’re not telling me, that means it’s not good or you’re just gonna decide later that I’m selfish. You might hurt me to get what you want and justify it with this. Take something from my side so we’re even, because even means safe. Even means I get access to what I need and you get access to what you need - so now we’re both using this relationship/friendship/etc for something and you wouldn’t wanna mess that up by putting me in danger any more than I’d want to mess it up by putting you in danger.

Of course, not every prosocial sees it the first way and not every pwASPD had those experiences and/or sees it that way. But that’s what I’ve found to be common. If you see “they make me happy” as what your or their end of the transaction is, it’s definitely a prosocial response, maybe with the exception of thinking of it as “getting their brain to dopamine/oxytocin” vs caring how they’re actually feeling. If not, if you need it to be practical, that’s definitely transactional.

It’s important to note this is personal relationships with no practical consequences to ending the relationship - most people see relationships (platonic) with coworkers or managers as transactional and that’s a way I usually explain it to prosocials (“do you deal with your boss bc you like them or bc they sign your check - and would your boss keep you hired if you didn’t do your job because you make them happy just by being there?”). But with a romantic or sexual partner, a friend, etc. this is not a typical view of relationships.

That said - you can *absolutely* not have ASPD and have transactional view of relationships. It’s not a 1:1 thing there; not everyone with ASPD has it and not every prosocial doesn’t. It’s just a really common piece of the puzzle that is this personality disorder.

Edit: ack I’m so sorry I forgot to add the csa tw tags they’re there now.

Plain text below the cut:

So I find prosocials and pwASPD both tend to think “but doesn’t everybody” when we hear this - it’s a super undescriptive term - but we’re thinking different things define something as transactional. We also see the reason for that transaction to be different.

From a prosocial generally, they’ll mean “I only want to be around people that ‘don’t drain my energy’, that don’t just take take take, that we mutually enjoy the friendship/relationship and want to be around each other”. That’s kinda their definition of getting something out of it, and they want everyone to get something out of it. If they’re draining you, they want you to be free of it so you can be happy, and the transactions involved can be purely emotional/vibes. The reason they feel this way is a desire for positive and enjoyable social connection; the consequence for an uneven/bad/missing transaction is discomfort and wasting their time in negative experiences and generally feeling bad in association with that person.

PwASPD see those transactions very very literally. There’s no vibes nor emotions in the transactions, those are either a reaction to the transaction or a bonus. We mean that we are getting something tangible or practical out of it. Rides, help with things we can’t or don’t want to do alone, sex, maybe even the social relief from the annoyance of “why don’t you ever talk to anyone?” coming from all sides. We also don’t always care if it’s even on the other person’s end. If they’re ok driving me everywhere/if they do it and don’t say or show they’re uncomfortable, then I will assume they are fine with that piece of the transaction. If I’m taking more than I’m giving and they seem chill with that then I’ll accept it. However, I won’t give them *nothing* and that’s because of our reason for transactions - it’s dangerous otherwise. First off, I have shit I need I can’t get myself as much as it sucks, so I need to be around people. But if we need something from them, what we learned in our childhoods is that we don’t get that for free. There’s always something over your head. A lot of pwASPD had friends or caregivers that would hold favors or even *basic, legally-mandated caregiving* over our heads as though we didn’t deserve it. Often our value was determined as a child by what we provided, and since children can’t provide much, we were worthless and not deserving of good treatment.

This is part of the reason (TW non-descriptive CSA mention, skip to the next paragraph if you want) that people thought ASPD was directly correlated with CSA for a long time - many cases of long term CSA come from either “I’ll give you x/do x for you if you help me with this” or worse, doing something first then saying “but I gave you X!/did X for you! I wouldn’t have if I knew you’d act like this”, often call us selfish if we tried to say no and maybe get aggressive or forceful after, and that is an easy lead-in to our view of interactions.

So a lot of us see it that if we want to be safe/know we can continue to get what we need, we HAVE to be giving them something. If you claim you like being around me “just to be around me” or worse that you’re willing to do something for me “just because I want to”, that’s not safe. You want something from me and I’ll give it to you - just tell me what it is. If you’re not telling me, that means it’s not good or you’re just gonna decide later that I’m selfish. You might hurt me to get what you want and justify it with this. Take something from my side so we’re even, because even means safe. Even means I get access to what I need and you get access to what you need - so now we’re both using this relationship/friendship/etc for something and you wouldn’t wanna mess that up by putting me in danger any more than I’d want to mess it up by putting you in danger.

Of course, not every prosocial sees it the first way and not every pwASPD had those experiences and/or sees it that way. But that’s what I’ve found to be common. If you see “they make me happy” as what your or their end of the transaction is, it’s definitely a prosocial response, maybe with the exception of thinking of it as “getting their brain to dopamine/oxytocin” vs caring how they’re actually feeling. If not, if you need it to be practical, that’s definitely transactional.

It’s important to note this is personal relationships with no practical consequences to ending the relationship - most people see relationships (platonic) with coworkers or managers as transactional and that’s a way I usually explain it to prosocials (“do you deal with your boss bc you like them or bc they sign your check - and would your boss keep you hired if you didn’t do your job because you make them happy just by being there?”). But with a romantic or sexual partner, a friend, etc. this is not a typical view of relationships.

That said - you can *absolutely* not have ASPD and have transactional view of relationships. It’s not a 1:1 thing there; not everyone with ASPD has it and not every prosocial doesn’t. It’s just a really common piece of the puzzle that is this personality disorder.

Edit: ack I’m so sorry I forgot to add the csa tw tags they’re there now.

#tw mentions of sex #tw csa #tw csa mention #tw abuse mention #tw sa #tw sa mention #tw child abuse mention #tw child abuse #aspd-culture-is #aspd culture is #aspd culture #actually aspd #aspd #aspd awareness #actually antisocial #antisocial personality disorder #aspd traits #anons welcome

[intersectionalpraxis]

I documented multiple cases with @EuroMedHR of Israeli soldiers abducting blonde children from #Gaza claiming they might be abductee Israelis.

As Israeli forces are nearing my area of refuge, I just actually told my brother’s wife to dye her blonde daughter’s hair black! [@/MahaGaza on X.]

response to Maha Hussaini's report: "our families used ash to protect light-skinned children from being stolen by white settlers. In Palestine, they're dying children's hair to stop their children from being stolen. Removing children from an ethnic group to be raised by oppressors is one of the markers of genocide" [@/ 1KarenWyld on X.]

Journalist Maha Hussaini says that she has documented cases of Israeli soldiers kidnapping blonde children from Gaza claiming they might be abductee Israelis. (Illustrative photo) [@/ QudsNews on X. 01/07/24.]

I recently posted about this on my page. Thankfully a mutual of mine sent this to me. I addressed some of my perspectives about this horrifying and ongoing/developing story -which I will update here once I see Maha Hussaini or her fellow journalists sharing their documentations.

I just want to make sure that this is continues to be addressed/spoken about. This is beyond horrifying, and I hope those children are safely brought back to their families and loved ones -free from the IOF -because this is just insidious.

#feminist #feminism #social justice #free palestine #palestine #freepalastine🇵🇸 #free gaza #settler violence #settler colonialism #colonial violence #tw child abuse #current events #current news #children of gaza #israel is a terrorist state #end the occupation #war crimes #human rights

[a-sip-of-milo]

It's always infuriated me hearing people say that children have it easy. It's only gotten worse as I've gotten older and have been able to reflect on my childhood and see the children around me grow up.

They do not have it easy. They don't get a say in most important things. They're seen is unintelligent, yet expected to understand things that full grown adults struggle with.

They've got a job, which is school, that is actually proven to not be working for a lot of them; myself included. They're expected to sit still and in silence for at least forty minutes at a time, and those with ADHD are treated as though they're immature and lazy because they often physically can't do it.

Far too many of them have abusive parents that lie through their teeth to make people think everything is fine, and of course, who would believe the child over the parent?

Aspects of abuse has been normalised. Parents are sympathised with when children open up about the things they've gone through, especially if they're not physical. They're told that their parents are only doing this because they love them, or that the child needs to start seeing things from their point of view. Meanwhile, adults can freely complain about their children on public forums and to friends and family and get away with it because "it's hard being a parent".

Fuck off and do better.

DNI Believers of narcissistic/borderline/anti-social/histrionic abuse.

#child abuse #tw child abuse #adhd #actually adhd #childhood ptsd #childhood memories #tw childhood abuse #narc abuse does not exist #npd safe

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

yea it's a show about nepo babies but Succession really said "20 billion dollars doesn't erase the persistent trauma of childhood abuse, or absolve the abuser" so like. remember that next time your parent tries to uno-reverse-guilt-card you with "but we gave you so much"

#gave me so much to spend years untangling in therapy #*points to writhing mass of cptsd symptoms nestled cozily in my skull* i call it the Gordian Knot of Shitty Childhoods #bc sometimes the only way to untie it is by cutting off shitty family #succession #tw child abuse #tw abuse #that being said. i wouldn't say no to 20 billion dollars

[traumasurvivors]

If someone you know experienced childhood neglect, they may not know things that you or other people consider “basic knowledge.”

Don’t shame them for not knowing. Making them feel bad because you had someone in your childhood who taught you things, while they didn’t, is not even a little bit helpful.

And yes, this post applies even if that person is you. Give yourself some patience and understanding. It’s not your fault.

#tw child abuse #tw neglect

[tangledinink]

hey, it's that rat and his daughter again!

✩ the gemini ✩ [ start ] [ prev ] [ next ]

#cracks knuckles. okay... #tw child abuse #child abuse #tw emotional abuse #emotional abuse #disordered eating #tw disordered eating #gemini au #rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rise of the tmnt #tmnt #tmnt 2018 #tmnt 2k18 #rottmnt au #rottmnt separated au #rottmnt sep au #rottmnt comic #rottmnt art #rottmnt fanart #rottmnt donnie #rottmnt donatello #rottmnt disaster twins #rottmnt leo #rise donnie #rise donatello #rise disaster twins #rise leo #rottmnt big mama #rottmnt splinter

[wilwheaton]

How did you get into acting? Was it something you've always wanted to do?

My mother forced me to become an actor when I was seven, and then refused to let me quit, even though I literally begged her to stop making me work. She used and exploited me to get things she wanted for herself.

I sincerely believed acting was something I wanted to do, because my mother manipulated and gaslighted me my entire childhood. I was completely brainwashed. By the time I was old enough to realize that not only was it not my idea, but that I didn't have to be an actor any more if I didn't want to, I was terrified I would be the huge failure my abusive father always made me believe I was, so I kept trying to be an actor well into my 30s.

In my 40s, I decided to retire from acting on-camera, and use what I'd learned over the years to work as a voice actor, audiobook narrator, and writer. I'm a New York Times bestselling author! And number on audiobook narrator!

I just turned 50 in July. I'm still doing the performing and entertaining work I'm pretty good at, but I'm only doing it on my terms. My favorite thing I'm doing right now is hosting The Ready Room, the official online destination for all things Star Trek universe.

I'm the happiest I've ever been in my life. I'm truly thriving. I've been married for almost 24 years, I have two wonderful children and a daughter-in-law I love like my own. It's a really good life, but I'm not going to lie: I had to crawl through a LOT of shit to get here.

#tw child abuse #tw abuse #tw child exploitation #stage mothers #child actor #survivors

[mysharona1987]

This utterly shameful situation will obviously end well.

#democrats #republicans #News #fast food #mcdonalds #politics #donald trump #Alcohol #Wisconsin #alcohol tw #Beer #bud light #tw child abuse #kentucky

[waywardsunlight]

The Owl House is the journey of a neurodivergent girl dealing with grief and the guilt that society has placed on her, finding people who accept and understand her for who she is through exploring a fantasy world like the one in the book her dad left her before he died, and conversely, it’s a story about a child abuser getting wrecked because he wants the approval of a messed up, extinct society so much that he’d rather live in a fantasy where he won than try to understand somebody he loved.

#the owl house #toh #toh spoilers #they’re literally. opposites #and I think about that so much #tw child abuse #I gotta repeatedly mention he’s a serial killer and child abuser bc I feel like people are trying to forget that

[ayeforscotland]

Jamie Oliver admits to abusing his children. Fucking horrible man.

#ayeforscotland #Jamie Oliver #tw child abuse

[intersectionalpraxis]

I documented multiple cases with @/ EuroMedHR of Israeli soldiers abducting blonde children from #Gaza claiming they might be abductee Israelis. As Israeli forces are nearing my area of refuge, I just actually told my brother’s wife to dye her blonde daughter’s hair black! [@/ MahaGaza on X. 01/07/24.] Read this twice, took me twice Zionists are kidnapping blonde Palestinian babies and pretending they're isra*lis, Palestinians are being told to dye their children's hair black [@/ Lamis_Deek on X. 01/07/24/]

Thank you to a mutual for sharing/alerting me to this. This is absolutely horrifying. Like WHO was it that said blonde and blue-eyed babies were superior??

This also makes me think of white European colonizers kidnapping Indigenous children and bringing them to "residential schools" -which were mass genocide camps. If ya'll even know a little about this history, that's what it reminds me of. Indigenous children were forcibly separated from their families and cultures. They were forbidden to speak their languages and were violently abused, and many were killed in heinous and cruel ways -there are still MANY unmarked graves in the white-settler nation of Canada.

This is beyond disturbing. I can't even imagine the horrors behind something like this. The IOF are depraved.

*Edit: for context, I'm not saying that the history of cultural genocide of Indigenous people in settler-colonial countries like Canada and the United States is a direct parallel to what is happening or what appears to be happening to Palestinian children. It just brought up initial thoughts (in terms of my perspective) about the IOF kidnapping Palestinian babies for their 'perceived whiteness,' [which made me think of Nazi Germany's white supremacist discourses], and how very specific it is of them to be taking Palestinian babies/young children and saying they are 'Israeli' [which reminded me of how Indigenous children were forcibly taken from their homeland/cultures by violent settler-colonial states]. I think most of us can agree that the intentions behind this are nefarious, and no matter the reason -I am not trying to erase the severity of and atrocities behind nearly 2 centuries of anti-Indigenous racism and systemic violence against Indigenous communities. I saw a re-blog with commentary about this -and I just want to acknowledge what they had said because this is important to address.

#feminist #feminism #social justice #free palestine #palestine #freepalastine🇵🇸 #free gaza #settler violence #settler colonialism #colonial violence #us colonialism #current events #tw child abuse #indigenous history #genocide #white supremacy tw

[dianagj-art]

This idea got out of hand way too quickly but I have no regrets<3

Isn't it fun to think that with all the crossovers One would actually have a support system of friends that care about him?

Coin Toss Michael by @gemini-forest

Bonus!

#he deserves all the hugs<3 #that's his emotional support parent figure #rottmnt fanart #rottmnt separated au #separated leo au #slau crossovers #coin toss au #rise leo #rise future michelangelo #dg art #dg fanart #dg comics #oh i forgot to put trigger warnings sorry guys #tw child abuse #cw child abuse

[faramirsonofgondor]

“Gabe isn’t abusive in the show” ARE WE WATCHING THE SAME SHOW???

Gabe is literally introduced by yelling at someone who, when Percy apologizes for Gabe’s behavior, says “I’m walking out, you’re walking in. I should be apologizing to you.” And then Percy reluctantly and slowly walks inside. And Gabe immediately starts in on him (calling him “Genius” in a mocking tone) as Percy repeatedly expresses that he just wants to talk to his mom ( and Gabe’s subsequent “Is that all you have to say to me?”) The fact that he answered Sally’s phone and acted like he had every right to do so?? The way he shows begrudging respect when thinks Percy was violent towards another kid at school?? The “you would think that because you’re a child, you don’t understand things…” The way he gets annoyed that Percy wants to know where his mother is. The “what are we doing Percy? every time! wow…wow!” in such a condescending tone??? Percy’s immediate alarm when Sally calls Gabe’s name. Gabe immediately yelling at Sally, not knowing anything about Percy’s life (he didn’t even know his school’s name despite literally just talking to them), the way he makes Sally negotiate to use the car (“Why am I okay with this?” “Make sure they put the hot peppers on my sandwich please!”) the way he acts like his tone of voice shouldn’t matter to Sally because he said “please” the aggressive behavior even after he concedes to letting them use the car (getting in Percy’s face, pointing his finger at him, etc.), like???

Just because he isn’t depicted as smacking the shit out of them doesn’t mean he isn’t abusive. He is constantly yelling, even when it’s not necessary, and is overall condescending and rude towards both Percy and Sally. He has a positive reaction towards the idea of Percy being violent, which means that he probably has no problems getting violent himself, even if it isn’t show on screen. The fact that he is constantly trying to redirect Percy and Sally’s decision to make himself the center of it (he is trying to goad Percy into an argument when he gets kicked out of school and overall keeps trying to redirect the conversation back to himself, he acts like he is allowed to breach Sally and Percy’s privacy but then makes Sally get his permission to drive somewhere, and even then she has to give him something in return). Like he is very clearly controlling and emotionally/financially abusive (he acts like Sally’s things are his despite not having a job and likely blowing through their money). It also seems like he tries to diminish Percy’s self esteem, possibly to keep him and Sally under his thumb (it’s a common tactic used by abusers to make the victims feel like the need to depend on the abuser). Overall, just because he might not be physically abusing them, doesn’t mean he isn’t abusing them and doesn’t mean his actions aren’t harmful. Furthermore, just because he isn’t violent on screen doesn’t mean he isn’t violent.

#pjo series #pjo tv show #pjo fandom #pjo #percy jackson #gabe ugliano #sally jackson #tw child abuse #abuse mention #tw abuse #emotional abuse #mental abuse #financial abuse #spousal abuse #abuse is still abuse no matter what it looks like #emotional abuse can be just as hurtful as physical abuse

[dastardly-crows]

my reaction to seeing people compare the real and horrifying reality of childhood SA and violence to fictional characters who will never experience pain or emotion:

#tags for reach #tw vent #vent post #tw child abuse #tw childhood trauma #sa mention #sa tw #tw sa mention #proshitter #proship #fuck antishippers #fuck antis

[angrylesbianstereotype]

Not to be all we live in a society but growing up under capitalism is realizing that nothing you loved as a child was ever inextricable from capitalism’s core tenants of greed and abuse of power and not even your childhood memories are sacred bc they were manufactured to turn a profit… Disney is a monstrous multimedia conglomerate that chews up and shits out everything in its path, Nickelodeon created a feeding ground for child predators to literally film their abuse of child actors and peddle it as children’s media, the author of Harry Potter is a raging bigot using her wealth and status to persecute some of the most marginalized people in the world… children are never safe in a world that will always prioritize money and concentration of power over their well being, and a childhood built off of a foundation of corruption and exploitation will always be a traumatic one, no matter the privileges it affords

#in case you can’t tell i just finished both quiet on set and shanspeare’s video essay on family vlogging #dan schnieder when i fucking catch you #also stauffer parents when i fucking catch you that case is burned into my brain #capitalism #quiet on set #disney #nickelodeon #jk rowling #tw child abuse