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doudouneverte · 5 months

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hii, how are u?

i've been obsessed w feli but sadly there aren't many fics w her.

could you write some angst+fluff for her? reader is sad that she can't introduce felicitas to her parents, because theyre not in the picture anymore (you can choose why) and feli comforts reader, but r feels like a burden?

a/n: oh, I love this one. Sorry for the wait but school is messing with my writing time...

"It's okay, I'm here"

*not my GIF*

Pairing: Felicitas Rauch x FRAWNT!reader

Summary: based on the request above

Type: Angst + Fluff

Warning: bad parents, homophobia (homophobic parents)

word count: 3398

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Back to the changing at the end of training, joy and excitement for the next game were clearly drowning the room. It will be the final of the DFB-Pokal against Freiburg. While the girls were planning things for the next day, you were discussing something with Svenja until music started to play in the room and you felt someone dragging you by the arm. You looked at them to find your girlfriend, Felicitas Rauch, visibly very excited to dance. You were exhausted and just wanted to get dressed and go back home, but her smile made you give up.

After a little dance and finally getting changed, you waited for your girlfriend in the parking lot, where you resumed your conversation with your captain.

"So, how was your little trip with Feli last week?" The German player asked.

"It was pretty cool. We didn't do anything special, but you know, with her, everything is special."

"Aww, look at you. You're too cute when you talk about her like that."

"I mean it. I don't really need to do something; I'm just grateful she's here, and I thought about..." You interrupted yourself when you felt your phone vibrating in your pocket. Before you could speak again, your girlfriend wrapped you in a tight hug and left some kisses on your neck, making you giggle.

"Okay, I think I'll let you enjoy your time together. We will see each other tomorrow." Svenja told you. You just nodded before she left, and you entered your car with the defender.

Back in your shared house, you exaggerated a groan before you left your shoes and your training bag at the entrance before collapsing on the couch. Feli laughed at your attitude before she joined you with Cinnamon in her arms.

"Oh, come on, training was rather light today." She said letting the dog sit on your lap before snuggling against your tired body.

"I know, but I didn't sleep enough yesterday, so I'm very tired." You explained.

"Don't worry, tomorrow is a day off. I know the girls proposed to have lunch, but if you're very tired, we can stay at home."

"I would love that, but you forgot something." You said making her a little confused. "Tonight, Julie, come, and we also need to prepare something for tomorrow." You remembered her.

Julie was your little sister, and the next day would be her birthday—well, not exactly. She already had her birthday the day prior, but since you started to play in Germany, she always comes to celebrate with you a few days later.

Feli knew about that. At least about the version you always told her—that being busy meant that your sister always had to come to Germany to spend time with you. It was actually true, but not the full version.

"Oh, yeah, I almost forgot. Do you need my help for anything?" Your girlfriend asked.

"Um, I think I just have to buy eggs and flour to make a cake for tomorrow, but don't worry I-"

"I'll do it!" The defender cut you. "Let it to me. You know how much I love your sister. Don't worry, you can go pick up her, and I'll buy everything we need for tomorrow." She assured you.

"Are you sure about that? I mean, I know you can deal with everything, but I don't want to force you to do anything. We just came back from training; you're tired."

"And so you are. Don't worry; I promise you it's okay. I love to pamper her." She stole you a kiss before standing. "Okay now, come on, we need to take a shower before we go."

"I don't know if I ever told you, but I'm really lucky to have you." You said before following.

"I know, you say it every day." She commented.

"And you don't know how much it means to me." You whispered before kissing her. The defender didn't hear you, but she still reciprocated the affection.

An hour and a half later, you were finally ready to leave, and it took you only thirty minutes to reach your destination. Like expected, your sister was waiting for you, and she immediately caught you in a hug when she saw you.

"Je commençais à croire que tu m'avais oublié. (I started to think that you forgot me.)" She said after you pulled away.

"Arrête de faire ta drama queen, je viens a peine de finir mon entrainement. (Stop doing your drama queen; I just finished my training.)" You replied. "Now let's go. I have a girlfriend that I want to see." You added while you started to put her luggage on the backseat.

"Oh, come on, you see her every day." She said before taking place on the passenger side, you rolled your eyes and decided not to talk back.

The ride back was filled with laughter and pure enjoyment at being reunited. Back at home, Feli was already here, and of course the two women instantly fell in each other's arms.

"Wow, okay, I already got replaced." You said irronicaly.

"Oh, come on, don't act like that; you are always with her." Your sister said.

"Okay, I don't want any arguments today; I'm really tired, and I think we all need to have a good night. So, now girls, let's eat and sleep." Feli said ending any potential sibling argument.

"Yes, ma'am." you both said before heading to the kitchen.

-----

The next day, you were awakened by a very excited defender, and because she had to be quiet, you found it very cute. When she realized that you were fully awake, she didn't waste more time before leading you into the living room to show you what she started to do.

"Wow, why are you so excited?" you asked her after almost tripping on your own foot.

"Look at this." The defender showed you all the decorations she made a little earlier. "I just need your help with something. But before that, what do you think about this?" she asked you.

"That's... incredible," you finished. "I didn't know you had so much talent to decorate this place," you added, really surprised.

"Thans. I didn't want to awaken you because I know that you were very tired yesterday."

"Oh, come on, babe, you know you're maybe the only person who is allowed to wake me up whenever you want." You said while you rolled your arms around her hips. "I meant it when I said that I'm lucky to have you in my life."

"Okay, now stop being cheesy and kiss me before the baby wakes up and starts to complain because we show 'too much love'." She mimicked your sister's voice.

Just after attaching your lips to Feli's, you heard someone making some disgusted noises behind you.

"I can't leave you two alone for five minutes," your sister said, making you roll your eyes. "And by the way, I'm not a baby anymore," she added.

"You need to stop eardropping, you little dipshit." You said earning a firm slap from your girlfriend.

"Okay, let's not talk about that." Feli said, escaping from your arms to hug your sister. "Happy birthday, Prinzessin (princess)."

"Oh, and now she's been called Princess; you never called me like that before." You said while you filled a cup of water.

"Stop pouting, mommy; it doesn't suit you." Your sister said making you choke on the water, and Feli blushed more quickly than ever seen.

"Julie!" you both yelled.

"What? It's your own fault to not be quiet while you....you have your affairs," she replied with a disgusted look.

"Please, someone kill me right now." Feli said this dramatically before going back to your shared bedroom.

You were about to say something when your sister's phone rang. She looked at it, then looked at you with a curious expression. You didn't have to ask before she showed you who was calling; it was your mom.

You picked up for her and quickly pressed the phone on her before leaving the room. On your way to go somewhere far away from your sister's phone, you collided with the defender.

"Hey, where are you going? We haven't given her her present yet." You didn't reply and just dragged her back from where she came out.

"I just want to cuddle with you while she's on the phone."

Feli was aware that something was strange after your request. Of course, it was not unusual for the defender that you asked something like that, but when Julie came to visit, you were always stuck with each other. Sometimes the defender felt like the third wheel, but she knew that because you couldn't see her as much as you wanted, it was logical that you wanted to spend all your time with her.

"Is everything okay?" The defender asked carefully while you were lying on top of her with your head hidden in the crook of her neck.

"Yes," you replied quickly, but without moving.

"Are you sure? Because usually you would be annoying Julie knowing that she can't do anything while she's on the phone." She said with a little smile on her face, reminding herself every time you did that and your sister chasing you around the hole house after.

"Yeah, don't worry, I just want to spend some alone time with you."

"Okay." She replied and started to play with your hair. A few seconds later, she heard someone knock on the door. "Come in."

Julie opened the door and immediately felt bad for you when she saw you curled against your girlfriend's body. "Uh, Y/n?" She called you, a little unsure of how she should announce it. When she heard you hum, she took a rather long moment before dropping the bomb. "Mom called. She asked if I was planning to come home soon and told her that I would stay until your next game." She took a pause, letting your girlfriend be confused for a moment. "Her and dad will come to see you play tomorrow."

"That's super!" Your girlfriend sheered, but when she was not met with the same excitement from both of you, she reconsidered it.

"Svenja wants to see me," you said before leaving the bed and heading to the bathroom. "I think it would be cool if you came too; I promised her to let her know when you come to visit," you said to your sister before closing the door.

Feli stayed there, trying to process whatever was happening. She didn't have to wait too long before you came back and started to get dressed.

"Listen, I don't know what's happening right now, but you do really need to leave right now?" the defender asked.

"Don't worry, we will be really quick." You tried to reassure her with a light peck on her lips, but she could feel that you were not totally honest with that. Even if she wanted to stop you or invited herself, she knew (almost) more than anyone to not overstep things with you.

~~~~~

"Well, when you say that something bad happened, I didn't know it was that bad." Svenja said while you were trying to be eaten alive by her couch.

"At least they didn't show up unnacounced." Julie said.

"Why do they have to come when we play a final? They had all the season to come and be as disrespectful as they wanted; why did they choose one of the most important games?" You asked no one.

"I think you should tell her." Your captain proposed.

"I can't..." You started to feel some tears filling your eyes.

"Y/n, I agreed to keep it for myself because we were sure that they would never come here to see you, but now things are different."

You sighed and tried to restrain some tears.

"Don't worry, we will be there if you need anything." Svenja reminded you.

~~~~~

An hour later, you were back at home. Feli noticed the change in mood but didn't say anything, at least not to you. She waited until you went to your bedroom to take your sister apart.

"Julie, what happened?" The defender asked.

"I don't think I'm the right person to talk to you about. I think you should see it directly with her." Your sister replied. "And honestly, I think she may need your help." She added.

In the bedroom, you were curled up on the bed while trying to stop spiraling–which was almost impossible–when you heard the door getting opened. You didn't have to look to know that it was your girlfriend who was visibly worried about your state.

"Hey liebe(love), what's going on?" She asked after she sat next to you.

"I don't want to play tomorrow." You said making her more worried than before.

"Why?"

"Because that means I would have to see them, which I don't want."

"Who? Your parents?" You didn't reply and just nodded. She laid down next to you and cuddled you as much as possible. "Listen, I don't know what happened with them, but can you explain me why you feel like that? You are usually the one who always complains that they never come to see you play, and now you're not happy with that."

"Trust me, you don't want to know."

"Of course, I want Y/n. They're the ones who raised you, and... they're your parents."

"They were." You stated making the defender's heart shatter at your expression. "They stopped being my parents at the moment they stopped seeing me like their daughter."

"What happened?" She asked after a little silence.

"Nothing," you replied. Your body was slightly shaking, and you were crying again. "nothing happened. They just hate me because I... because I..." You couldn't find the strength to finish your sentence while you were remembering your sudden departure from the place you once called home.

Feli tried to calm you, but nothing seemed to work.

"They hate me because I love you." You said, and now the defender started to put some pieces together.

"They don't like who you are?" She asked, and you shook your head. She finally dragged you into a bone-crushing hug while you continued to cry on her shoulder.

"It's okay, babe; I'm here. I'll not leave you." She said trying to shush you.

"I don't want to see them, please." You pleaded to no one because you knew that whatever happened, you would have to face them.

Your girlfriend pulled away from the hug and cleared some tears from your face. "Hey, hear me out, mein liebe(my love). Even if these people don't like you, we will always be there for you. Me, Julie, and the team. And even Cinnamon and my parents too." She kissed one cheek and the other before she spoke again. "If they don't love you because of who you are, that's their problem. For me, you are the most beautiful and incredible woman who ever walked on this planet; you are perfect, and nothing could change that. I will not let some horrible people think that they can change that. I love you, and I don't care if I have to fight your parents or the entire planet to have you by my side, because I would definitely do it."

Your sobs were more calm after her confession. That was the first time someone said something like that to you. "Do you mean it?" You asked.

"Of course. And look, my parents already love you, so you don't have to care about what your parents think about us. And I was thinking that if one day I have to ask for someone's blessing to marry you, it will definitely be your sister..."

She continued to ramble for a moment until you kissed her, and she realized what she said.

"I mean only if you want, of course." She said making you laugh quietly.

"Let me some time to think about it, but I would be happy with that."

You stayed in your girlfriend's arms for a moment until you heard someone knock on the door. When Julie opened it, she could tell that you cried a lot, but from your expression and Feli's tight grip, she could also guess that you finally decided to tell her about your past.

"Excuse me, I don't want to ruin anything, but I think we have a birthday to celebrate, and we still don't do anything today." Your sister reminded you.

~~~~~

The final whistle announced the end of the match, and with that, your victory. You were celebrating with your teammates when you spotted your sister and your parents among the VfL fans. You shoot a sincere smile at your sister but decide to ignore the other adults to not ruin the mood of the team.

After a little celebration in the locker room, it was time to leave. You were in the bus waiting for Feli to come, but the defender didn't show up since you left her a few minutes earlier.

"Hey, Poppi, do you know where Feli is?" You asked your captain, a little confused, not to see your girlfriend anywhere.

"She said she had someone to see, but she should be back really quickly." The striker replied, and despite your pout, there was nothing you could do except text her.

In the parking lot, your sister was talking with your parents when they heard someone coming in their direction.

"Feli?" Your sister asked very confusedly.

"Hi Prinzessin, I hope you enjoyed the game." The defender said while she hugged the younger woman. After she pulled away, she looked at your parents and held her hand, which they shook much to her surprise. "Hi, I'm Felicitas Rauch. I think you saw me play earlier."

"Yeah. We don't usually watch football; we came because our little girl wanted to see this match, but I need to say that I'm very impressed by your performance." Your mom said with a rather bright smile, and that's almost made your girlfriend feel sad to know that the smile that she loves the most came from someone who hates you the most.

"Yes, I have to say that I agree with my wife on that; your team was very good." Your father added, and the defender offered them a fake smile. Julie watched the interaction, totally flabbergasted by everything.

"Thank you. I really appreciate that, but I came to talk to you about something else." The German said, earning a confused look from the couple. "I'm Y/n's girlfriend." At those words, your parents faces changed suddenly. The bright and welcoming smile was quickly replaced by a heinous and disgusted expression. "See, I'm not here to ask for your blessings or anything like that. No, I came to tell you to never show in front of her again. You already destroyed her too much in the past, and it took me a very long time to put the pieces together. I don't know why you showed up today, but judging by your expression and your lack of good feelings for her, I don't think you're here to make things up. I just want you to leave and never come back. You ignored her for the most part of her career. I think it will not be very difficult to do the same a little longer."

"I knew it." Julie mumbled to herself after your girlfriend finished her speech.

"I don't say goodbye; just go straight to hell and leave her alone." The defender said before going back to the team bus.

Almost five minutes later, you were talking with Dom and Lena when you saw your girlfriend finally walking to the bus with an angry expression. However, this feeling totally got washed away when she saw you tap the seat next to you to indicate that you had saved her a seat. She crashed next to you and intertwined your fingers before resting her head on your shoulder.

"Where were you?" You asked quietly.

"Saying goodbye to someone." She said with a proud smile. When you nodded and were about to resume your previous chat, she grabbed your face with her free hand, making you look at her. "I'm really lucky to have you in my life, mein liebe." She said making you blush.

"I'm very lucky too." You replied. "I love you."

"I love you too."

#woso x reader #woso fanfics #feli rauch #felicitas rauch #feli rauch x reader #felicitas rauch x reader #vfl wolfsburg women #vfl wolfsburg women x reader

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zoerocksand1 · 2 months

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hiiiiiii the puppets live in my brain :)

OKAY SO i don't remember where i saw some of the posts, but overall stuff is happening with censoring i think

i'm gonna ramble now:

on the art for Howdy's Holiday Hullabaloo, aunt Tooduloo and uncle Adieu's Good Friend Sue wasn't present (i for sure interpreted the three of them as poly), im fairly certain Sue is the only person in the song not present in the art (minus Barnaby since he shows up at the end)

Eddie is having a whole situation, as we've seen, and he and Frank are a thing yah? but in universe it seems like the narrators and story are pushing Frank and Julie as a couple (i think i remember Julie being confirmed as genderfluid somewhere, but it seems like she tends to present fem, and Frank being nb but seems to present a lil more masc?, so on the surface Julie and Frank could pass as a cishet couple)

back in the interview with Wally, the interviewer asks about his love-life, and seems disappointed when he doesn't understand- like he really wants Wally to have a romantic partner

it seems like something really wants to keep things from being queer? no art of Sue, trying to get rid of Eddie, pushing romance on Wally...

like am i crazy (yes) or is one of the warnings for welcome home specifically even homophobia?

also Eddie only started that whole disassociation breakdown once he relaxed, and stepped out of his Overworked Mailman role. once he relaxed and tried to be himself while in Home, things went Bad. SO where im going with this is Home might be homophobic??? or represent a homophobic household?? Eddie wasn't fitting the role he was expected to play, tried to be himself, and then Bad Things happened. A homophobic household?

HOME-OPHOBIC?

EDIT:

ALSO, so we all agree that Frank knows some things, right? okay what if he KNOWS about this? What if that's why he called Eddie "Mr. Dear"??? like yah maybe they have a thing, but like on-set Frank holds up a professional facade between them?

WHAT IF THAT'S WHAT HE'S ACTUALLY SINGING ABOUT HERE IN THE BUG-A-BYE & GOODNIGHT SONG???

some might find it sad (us)

even if i might not be able to see you (he has to act cold to Eddie on-set)

i know it's for the best, i can't keep you (he knows Home or something else will hurt Eddie if they don't fill their roles of "Mailman" and "Julie's Partner" respectively)

?????????????????????

EDIT 2:

OHMYGODS HI AGAIN

ALSO WHAT IF THAT'S WHY FRANK ONLY CALLED HIM EDDIE ONCE HE REALIZED SOMETHING WAS VERY WRONG WITH HIM? HE WAS WORRIED THE WHOLE TIME BUT DIDN'T WANT TO SLIP UP AND BLOW THIER COVER UNTIL HE THOUGHT IT WAS ABSOLUTELY NESECARY TO SEE IF HE WAS OKAY

#welcome home #welcome home update #welcome home homewarming #welcome home eddie #welcome home wally #eddie dear #wally darling #howdy pillar #frank frankly #julie joyful #barnaby b beagle #poppy partridge #welcome home home

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glitterinmyveinss · 5 months

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// say yes to heaven //

johnny knoxville x reader

authors note: Johnny goes by PJ, some things might be innacurate apologies in advance, mentions of homophobic slurs (i can say it)

❥༄ It's a warm july evening, the sunset sky looks like cotton candy, the kids are still out playing, and me and pj are on the steps of his trailer drinking some cold beers. i've known pj ever since me n my mom first moved to Tennesse at age 5. i ponder back on that moment, the memory still fresh in my mind.

❥༄ "y/n! get your boxes from the back of the uhaul girl!" my mother shouted. i sighed and made my way from the empty field to the back of the van we came in while my mother put her belongings inside our new home. a boy around my age with dark chocolate hair, warm brown eyes, and a horrendous haircut came up to me. "are you my new neighbors?" he asked enthusiastically. i nodded shyly. "cool! i'm pj by the way. my trailers right there." i glanced over to where he was pointing. i noticed a brown trailer with white stripes, white steps, and various beer cans and cigarette butts littering the patch of grass in front. i turned back to him and introduced myself back. "my names y/n. my parents divorced so we moved here." "mine are divorced too! wanna be friends?" we've been inseparable ever since.

❥༄ i set down my can with a sigh and put my hands in my hair. i've lived in the same trailer ever since, things never really got better for me and my mom. i started working at the local jcpennys working the beauty department but that's it, and Pjs been working with his dad at his auto repair shop ever since we were 13. pj turned to look at me, his brows furrowed and his eyes fixated on me. "what's troublin' you doll?" i picked my head up with a sad smile. i loved when he called me that. "whens it gonna get better peej?" i let out a dry chuckle. "i mean are we just gonna stay in this town our whole lives? living pay check to pay check?" he huffed and turned away from me. "i don't know y/n...why are you bringing this up?" "because i don't want that to be my life pj. maybe it was good for our parents but...don't you want different?" he took another sip from his can and a long drag from his cigarette and was quiet for a while. "of course i want different but it's not that simple y/n...plus the world needs workers like us and our parents anyway." i couldnt belive what he was saying. it was so out of character for him. he was never one to conform to society despite us growing up in the south where you'd get called a fag for just about anything. but people didn't care when it came to pj. he could be wearing a tutu and still look cool. that's why i didn't understand why he was giving up his future to stay in a town like this when the world had so much more to offer him, to offer us. "you know, i don't get you sometimes pj." i threw my can on the porch and sat up. "when are you gonna wake up y/n?" he shouted at me. i looked at him wint utter confusion painted on my face. he stared back at me with those piercing dark eyes. anytime i looked into them, it was like i was stuck in place, and like the rest of the world was no more, just me and pj. "w-what do you mean?" i spoke. he scoffed at me and continued, still shouting. "do you think it's that easy? that we can just leave this all behind and start a new life like that?" i huffed in frustration and crossed my arms, "that's not what i meant and you know it. i just meant that we both have dreams pj. what about your writing?" he turned away from me and shook his head, his eyes were even darker now due to his mood. i noticed there were imprints on his can due to his grip on it. "what about my writing y/n? you heard my dad." a while ago, pj shared with his dad his dreams of being a writer, and how he wanted to write for this magazine in LA, just to get his foot out the door. his dad didn't take it well at all and said he better get the wrench he asked for because writing won't pay the bills. i stayed quiet, not knowing what to say. pj got up to stomp his cigarette out. when he was done he locked eyes with me. he stared at me with such intensity, it made my knees buckle and my stomach flip. maybe it's a good thing he wore shades 99.9% of the time. i wanted nothing more than to reach out and hug him, let him know that anyone who doubted him didn't know what they were talking about. that me and him could make it on our own. but we were just friends. and he was even more stubborn drunk than he was sober. he turned to go inside then stopped. "you better get home y/n...it's getting dark." i felt the tears sting the corners of my eyes, like bees in the summer time. this wasn't the first time we fought like this, but it's the first time he didn't invite me in afterwards. usually he'd say something along the lines of sorry, or how he has some left over apple pie he needs help eating, really he would say any excuse. but this time, it was like he wanted nothing to do with me. "you're a coward philip and you know it." i shouted. "you have just as much potential as anyone else in this world to do something great, but you're scared!" he stayed with his back towards me, his fists clenched and his head low. "leave y/n."

❥༄ i stared at him until my vision became blurry with tears, which didn't take long. i've always been emotional. i ran away from him, in the direction of our old elementary. i always went there when things became too much to handle and i just needed somewhere to escape to. once i got there i sat on the old rusty swings that squeaked each time you swayed. i felt like shit. maybe i was too hard on pj. it's just that all i wanted was for me and him to have a good future. maybe the reason why i got so mad was because i imagined our futures would be us as lovers, not best friends. i wish i brought one of those beers before i left. i heard rustling coming from my left side and when i turned to look, i saw pj. i turned away and stared at the ground. it was quiet for a while while he sat on the swing beside me. "i'm sorry doll. i didn't mean to yell at you like that, you know how i get when i drink coors." i began to sob as i spoke, "no peej i'm sorry, i was too hard on you." i put my head in my hands and hid my face. pjs eyes scrunched up as he began laughing at me. "oh come on y/n, no need to bring out the water works. we're all good girl" he moved his hand and began rubbing my back. i sniffled and picked my head up, turning to him with a small smile that he returned.

❥༄ it was like that for a while. just me and pj swaying back and forth, till he spoke up. "you know i'm not a coward y/n..." i faced him and frantically began explaining myself. "i know pj i'm sorry it's j-" he cut me off. "the only reason why i'm not doing what i want is because... i wanna keep you close to me." i stayed staring at him. my eyes wider than usual, and my lips tucked between my teeth. "the magazine i wanna write for is based in LA. that means i would have to move there." i remained quiet. he turned to look at me. "come on y/n say some-" it was probably the alcohol more than me, but out of no where, i decided to kiss him. his lips were warm snd soft, i could still taste the cigarettes and coors on his breath. i felt euphoric and nauseous all at once. i pulled away awkwardly and faced him. "i'm sorry peej, i don't know-" he cupped the side of my face and pulled me in for a second kiss. after a minute we pulled away, but we were stuck staring at eachother, like one would disappear if the other dared to look away. "i'll go with you." i spoke, barely above a whisper. pj scrunched his face in confusion. "pardon?" i rolled my eyes at him. sometimes he was such an airhead. "i'll go with you to LA. just say the word and i'll go pj." he stared at me with a goofy crooked smile and picked me up from the swing. i squealed as he threw me over his shoulder. "let's start packing then. we'll get the first flight out as soon as we're done." even though i was upside down and felt dizzy, i couldn't be happier.

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 1 month

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aita for going no-contact with my ex a couple months after we broke up?

i (22nb) dated my girlfriend (26f) for nearly three years. we were long-distance, and i had intended on visiting her post-covid (we started dating in fall 2020). the relationship was great at first, messaging each other every day and being lovey-dovey. in december 2022, things began to fall apart. she told me that i would never be able to visit her or she would be able to see me due to her homophobic parents. i told her that really hurt because that was a huge part of starting the relationship, and i wasn't sure if i could be completely ldr. we didn't talk for a week or so after that.

while we weren't talking, things began to bubble up. i realized how she was using me almost exclusively as an erp partner/person to write her self-insert fanfics and used me as a bank when she wanted to spend money on nsfw art commissions instead of her phone bill (i had to really be on her about paying back $100+ before all this), and how the relationship was starting to fade compared to when we first started dating. i brushed this aside due to my own neurodivergency (bpd, among others) and the fear of abandonment.

fast forward to summer 2023. I'm on vacation visiting my uncles and having fun as it's my first time flying alone. i told my gf before this that i was going to be on vacation and busy during that time. during my time away, she messaged me asking to continue an rp we had done before the trip, saying "it only needs two more replies". i told her matter-of-factly that i was on vacation and didn't have the time. she accused me of being harsh and told me, "i could've just said no". i talked to my uncles about this, as it was upsetting me. they advised me that "a person can be in your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime," being that not everyone will be in your life forever. i took this in and decided it was time to break up with her.

we didn't talk for a few weeks after my trip until i decided to break up with her. while telling her i didn't want to be in a relationship anymore, she asked "will we still rp and write fics together?" it was clear where her priorities lay. i said yes, and that we could continue to be friends, just not dating. this was in july 2023.

now, up to september 2023. i wrote 100ish-word drabbles for kinktober instead of longer fics so i could balance it with my college course load. i shared the link to the beginning of the collection with my ex. she suggested i write 500 words for each day instead of 100. i asked why, and she said (her exact words)

"how are you gonna write a threesome in 100 words though? this convo we're having is at 65 words rn, that's over half your wordcount"

this upset me, and i had the urge to cut her all off and act self-destructively. i decided to instead calm down and not talk for a few days as i mentally sorted it out. a few days later, i civilly responded to her, saying

"what you said about not being able to fit a fic like that into 100 words really hurt ... all I have time for between responsibilities is 100ish words, and I chose to do that rather than abandoning kinktober ... if you’re that dissatisfied with my writing, you can find someone else to write your self insert fics"

she responds while i'm on voice chat with two different friends. she says,

"i'm not dissatisfied with your writing. i did not mean what i said that way. there's no need to be spiteful."

the spiteful comment completely threw me off, and i sent the screencap to said friends i was on vc with. my instinct was to respond civilly again, trying to patch things up. my friends acted like kronk's devil and angel on my shoulder ("no, no, he's got a point"), and i ended up blocking her on every platform instead of responding at all. i feel relieved that she's out of my life.

a month later, i checked my tumblr inbox for an ask from a friend. the second message in the inbox is clearly from her, but from a side account she denied having when i brought it up to her a year or so ago (the blog sent me a meme that she had shared on her main account so i wondered if it was her). it read (paraphrased),

"it's obvious you were never gonna work on that fic or rp again! you always had an excuse to push it off. i didn't matter when i was no longer your gf. you were a suffocating datemate, and i couldn't be gone for more than 10 min, but it was ok for you to not respond for hours!"

little note: i was a full-time college student working two jobs at the time. i had very little time to socialize on platforms like discord, and i took every opportunity i took. on the other hand, my ex was unemployed aside from occasional freelance writing, was not in education, and lived at her parent's house.

i deleted the message as she didn't deserve a response, nor did i want to make it public, but how our relationship ended still weighs on me. aita?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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chirpsythismorning · 11 months

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Skam show-runner Julie Andem clocking the fuck out of Mike being queer-coded in s1 of Stranger Things, and then using it as inspiration to queer-code Isak in s3 of Skam can be something so epic.

THIS! THIS is what I'm talking about!

In ST, there are two scenes in s1 (pretty/still pretty) that milkvans use as irrefutable proof that Mike has always had romantic feelings for El, with the primary object in the scene being a mirror.

THIS. MEANS. SOMETHING.

Mirrors in film mean something more often than not, but especially when they are the focus of a scene is when they definitely mean something. And the way they go about it differently in between those two scenes in ST, drastically differently, and considering the subject matter is very very queer coded, is how you really know there is a significance in this case.

And that scene above from Skam proves it.

Because apparently, another filmmaker watched ST, picked up on those odd details surrounding Mike and said shit I'm gonna use that...

Notice how Isak here, a gay teenager who is fully in denial with others and himself, to the point where he makes really homophobic remarks often, gets caught denying a bunch of girls as being attractive in a conversation with his friends. And so now they're questioning him and making him feel on edge bc the focus is on him and his attraction (lack thereof) to girls.

While his friends aren't even implying he is gay in this moment, it's just them genuinely being confused why he doesn't think any of the girls they think are attractive are attractive, you can still see that Isak starts to feel the pressure and so he latches onto the first girl he thinks of, Emma.

Emma just so happens to look like Natalie Portman with her extremely short hair.

Low and behold this very girl enters the room shortly after he says this and so now Isak has to face this and give his friends the impression he is fully interested in this girl, otherwise they would DEFINITELY suspect something is off. And so he goes all out.

He outs himself.

He literally says Don't you look like that boy from Stranger Things, and then follows it up with saying he would only be attracted to her if we're assuming he is attracted to boys, only to quickly backtrack and start to approach her really flirtatiously, then going all out by making out with her.

As this happens, he is kissing her in the bathroom, in front of a mirror...

Now I want to make clear, I am not saying ST was inspired by Skam. I'm pretty sure I did make that clear, it's actually the other way around, which is even more incriminating arguably.

S1 of Stranger Things came out in 2016, whereas s3 of Skam came out the following year in 2017. The hype for ST was so immense, to the point where you had Norwegian teens referencing it in everyday conversation.

The creator of Skam took scenes from ST that framed Mike very peculiarly in s1, and used it as queer-coding for a character that ended up being revealed as gay.

For those that haven't seen Skam Norway... Run. Leap. Drive. Teleport. Do what you have to do and go watch it. It's not available on any streaming, in fact it's only available online through fan-sites outside of where it's based. Conveniently, all 4 seasons with English subs can be found HERE.

Basically this show is amazing and you need to watch it. Some seasons I like more than others. But the gist of it is that every season focuses on a different character from the main group, where they experience some sort of misunderstanding/miscommunication that leads to them being misinformed about certain things, followed by them making mistakes and having doubts, though it tends to end in a way that feels so refreshing compared to what we're used to.

Skam also translates in english to shame, so the idea is that there is an arc surrounding some form of shame every season.

With Isak in particular, he's the focus for s3, though his arc starts to become more clear as early as the end of s1.

Eva, the character in focus for s1, borrows Isak’s phone to call someone, and ends up seeing that there's gay porn in a bunch of his tabs on his browser. Their friend Noora also witnesses this and she ends up being the focus of s2.

Throughout s2, we get even more blatant hints that Isak is gay and in love with his best friend...

So it's established pretty early on throughout the series that Isak is queer and in denial about it, but it isn't until s3 that he himself is able to confront it.

The way they go about this arc, with Isak having unrequited feelings, is exactly how ST would have done it IF Mike hadn't returned Will's feelings.

So if you're looking for more byler proof, go watch this show and see how they don't let Isak pine over his best friend Jonas for more than 2 seasons.

When the story finally puts Isak at the forefront, they give him his own love interest instead of keeping him pining for his friend. It's really pure and amazing and TBH I would have been fine if ST was framed this way, with it being clear from the beginning Isak's feelings were unrequited, and with the other half of the series focusing on him moving on and finding love himself, and also with his best friend and him still being very close.

Although Isak has that queer-coding from the very beginning, with him looking at his friend all fondly, he is still not able to confront any of it. The following season he dates a girl and is a little over the top about it, though we can also see that he is struggling despite not wanting to face it. It isn't until s3 when the story shows us his inner struggle at the forefront, that we see him finally confront it and accept it.

For those that don't know, Skam also loosely inspired the Nick Nelson gay test scene... So we have character that despite showing many signs of being queer, to the point where we know he literally watched gay porn, is still finding himself in a situation where he's taking gay tests 2 years later....

While he might have the knowledge deep down, he was not willing to face it. In fact he was doing everything he could to avoid confronting it.

But then he falls in love and suddenly it's not something he can ignore anymore...

#byler #stranger things #mike wheeler #isak valtersen #skam norway #this show is sooo good please watch #mike experiencing queerness at a young age #not understanding it #not willing to confront it #until he starts having feelings for a boy #and how those feelings play a crucial role in Mike confronting and accepting his queerness #and when in s5 he finally faces it and accepts it and can finally pursue Will the way he wants to #out and proud #we’ll see him finally being happy and true to himself #instead of grouchy and distant

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virgo-dream · 1 year

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heard u need some headcanons!! much love bc this time of year is ROUGH 🫂

Hob got really into the queer liberation movement and has gone on to be the resident bisexual professor that all the students know is a safe person to go to and helps out with the LGBT clubs on campus.

He gets really excited to share this with Dream, who is a little confused about why it's so important (having missed much of the fight) but immediately takes interest because omg Hob is into more than ladies??

Hob hosts the club at the New Inn and Dream shows up and all the students just Know by the way those two look at each other and spend the night trying to get them to admit it to each other.

Look. LOOK. I'M. I'm very NORMAL ABOUT THIS. Did you know the bi flag was unveiled in December 5th of 1988? Did you know HOB DIDN'T MEET DREAM IN JULY 7TH OF 1989 ANYWAY HAVE A FIC

Dream doesn't get it at first. He never really did get it, but only attributed it to the need humanity had for labels, for packing things into boxes and saying this goes here and that goes there. Sometimes, it led to this goes to heaven and you go to hell. It seemed to be a very common one, too. He was beyond that; his name said it all, Dream was endless. Not he nor she, not man nor creature, he was all there was to be and the nothingness beyond it. Gender and sexuality need not apply.

Still, it meant so much to Hob, that he'd have dreams about it. Nightmares too, for nights on end, and even if Dream begged Hob to allow him to take them away, Hob always declined, always braved through them. "If you take them, I'll forget how much it all means. I'll forget why I'm still fighting."

They sat at the New Inn one afternoon, while Hob graded papers and Dream had a cup of chamomile tea, but his eyes couldn't help but focus on a shiny pin on Hob's jumper shaped like a flag, the shades of pink, purple and blue a spot of proud colour in Hob's otherwise earthy colour palette.

"It's the bisexual pride flag."

"Hm?" Dream's eyes dart up to meet Hob's, tilting his head slightly. He wasn't sure if he should feel bad for being caught, because he wasn't sure what he was looking at in the first place.

"The pin. I wear it for my students, but also for myself. The kids feel safer I guess, knowing they have at least one of their own in the faculty. Can't say it doesn't make me feel good too."

Hob has a particular tone to his voice that makes Dream's heart sing in tune to its melody. It's a fuller sense of self, maybe more than Dream ever had in regards to his own identity. "...one of their own?"

"Oh, I– Sorry, those are pretty recent." Hob straightened himself up (ha) on the chair, his lecturing posture taking over. Dream liked when he did that. He liked to hear Hob speak of things he had deep knowledge of and passion for. "This one was created in 1988 by a queer activist called Michael Page. Had the pleasure of being there when it was first unveiled, but clearly it took a long time until I was able to wear something like this out in public and not be decked by some bloody homophobe."

It was starting to sink in.

"...I'm afraid I was not present for these developments." Dream saw the look on Hob's face, like he was ready to apologise. He raised a had to stop him, waving his concern away. "As far as I can remember, queer was not a form of self identification, but only a way to shun out those outside the established norm."

"Ah, yes. We reclaimed it, though. Or are reclaiming it. The 80s were crazy. All of them were, for me." Hob smiled at Dream, at their shared secret and at their years of now reestablished friendship.

"I think you're lonely."

Could it have been....? Could he have meant...?

"What does it mean for you, then?" Dream asks in a way he hopes sounds inconspicuous, pointing at the pin. He was hesitant to ask, afraid to be getting it all wrong.

"For me? It means I love whoever I love. Man, woman, either or neither."

The pride coming from Hob's words filled Dream with hope, something he had not felt in a long, long time. The look in his face then shifted onto something else, something he didn't quite understand. "...what about you? That is, if you're okay with talking about that. I don't want to overstep. Last thing I want is for you to walk out–"

"I won't, Hob." Dream knew Hob had reason for feeling that way. "I don't believe the terminology you have could define my experience. I have laid with mortals and gods alike, and have wore many faces and names. It is beyond human comprehension."

Hob seems takes a moment to think about what he'd just heard. Dream feels like he might have thrown too much at his human friend. "...I think I get it. But, and tell me to bugger off I'm wrong, do you prefer to be a particular way? To be with a particular sort of being?"

Dream. Didn't have an answer.

He never thought of what he preferred. He'd never felt in need of any sort of outside validation, but. That was a lie. He needed it. He just never cared to look for it.

Hob's smile was what broke him out of the spell of his own self doubt. "It's okay if you don't have an answer, you know. It takes people a loooong time to get it, it took me nearly 600 years, you know? Ah! You know what? I've got an idea–" He reached inside his brown messenger bag, pulling out a colourful piece of paper, handing it over to Dream. A pamphlet for a meeting. "We're having a meeting for the uni's LGBT clubs here at the Inn. I want this to be a safe space for the kids, and to get them to connect with other folks in the community, share their experiences. It's tomorrow, and I'd love it if you could make it. I'm sure they would too."

Dream took the pamphlet in hands, looking at the bright colours and bold fonts, taking in every bit of information Hob was giving him and trying to fill in the gaps of the questions he wouldn't dare ask. After a moment, he looked up at Hob, allowing himself a small smile. "I shall be in attendance, then."

#if i keep writing this now i won't ever go to bed lol #thank you for sending this!!!#aquilathefighter #dreamling #hob x dream #hob x morpheus #the sandman #the sandman fanfic #ask fic #hob gadling #dream of the endless #morpheus #virgo dream writes

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beautiful-basque-country · 6 months

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Can you explain what is the deal with the recent protests in madrid and why they're all full of Fascists? I swear i saw someone waving a flag from the spanish empire in the news the other day

Kaixo!!

Yes, hopefully I can!

General elections were held in July, but there still isn’t a President of the Spanish Government. PP leader Feijóo failed to gather votes enough to become President in the Congress, so now PSOE leader Pedro Sánchez is trying. He has already some support, but will only be able to become President just if Catalan party JPC (a Catalan party that was key in the failed referendum for independence of 2017) votes for him.

So JPC and PSOE are negotiating, and it seems like PSOE has accepted JPC demands: that Catalan politicians that were imprisoned and/or accused of the crime of treason are amnestied; and that the 15 billion euros debt Catalunya has with Spain is canceled. Things look good and is almost sure that tomorrow Nov 16 2023 Pedro Sánchez will be named Pesident of Spain again.

While these negotiations were happening, PP and VOX - remember, the ones that couldn't gather enough support to achieve presidency - have been calling their people aka fascists to protest these concessions in the streets which, at first sight, should be nothing wrong.

But reality is quite different:

basically, Spanish nationalist and fascist parties have now started a strategy of street protests to try to get with chaos and an apparent social discomfort what they couldn't achieve at the voting stations.

they are protesting because against aaaaall the polls the right wing won't rule Spain and it's a very hard pill to swallow. The negotiations with Catalunya are just an excuse. They don't care about Catalunya, they just want Spain governed by one of them.

the protesters intended to storm into the PSOE headquarters with iron bars, ropes, sticks, etc, and attacked the police with bottles.

they've been calling Pedro Sánchez homophobic slurs, threatening to kill him, chanting the name of Franco + Francoist mottos and songs, and overall doing fascist things.

PP and VOX allegedly asked them not to bring Francoist flags so media couldn't accuse them of fascists because the parties want them to look like people from every ideology who are against the Catalan amnesty. So they brought imperial flags, flags with the cid, the Habsburg flag, etc. They're not fooling anyone, we all know they're not people with different ideas: they're full on francoists and nazis.

#euskal herria #basque country #pays basque #pais vasco #euskadi #catalunya #spain #politics #news #current events #antifa

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museumgiftshoperaser · 6 months

Text

80s New York Art Scene AU for @steddiebang Now on AO3

Written by me with art by @melonalemonade & @dreaminginpencil Beta'd by @lihhelsing & Nevertheless

If Eddie had known that sharing his art studio with Robin would include her buddy Steve, he never would’ve offered it in the first place. There. He said it. If that makes him a bad friend, so be it. Because Steve is around all the time. Pastel and prissy. Sculpted from marble, yet dressed like a Macy’s mannequin. Always hovering. They got Robin’s potters wheel up the stairs last week, a three man effort he can still feel in his lower back, and now she’s fucking teaching him. Full on, arms wrapped around his waist, hands guiding hands. Someone grab him a bucket, ‘cause Eddie’s about to throw up. He’s not even good at it. Steve can barely get the hump of clay centered on the wheel and he refuses to get stains on his clothes. It’s fucking clay. It comes out in the wash. Steve’s shirtless approach to pottery is borderline offensive to the arts.

More information under the cut:

The posting date is less than two weeks away and I'm beyond excited to start sharing this fic with you guys! I've been working on it since January and it's the longest thing I've ever written. This story is absolutely drowning in 80s neo-expressionist art, graffiti and street art. Think Jean Michel Basquiat and Keith Haring. Everything about this fic is covered in paint <3

Posting Schedule: Nov. 7: Prologue + Chapter 1 - "Takes One to Know One" Nov. 10: Chapter 2 - "You've Done This Before" Nov. 14: Chapter 3 - "The Boy From California" Nov. 17: Chapter 4 - "A Regular Thing" Nov. 21: Chapter 5 - "You Don't Have to Tell Me" Content warnings for: Past abusive relationship, mentions of abuse during childhood, addiction, slighty toxic relationship, period typical homophobia and mentions of homophobic parents, mentioned death of a parent, explicit sex scenes with dom/sub undertones I've got a little snippet for you here:

“Ta-dah,” Robin says with a big smile and an even bigger hand gesture. She stretches her arms like a big reveal, which only highlights how small the studio is. Both of her hands almost touch a wall. Eddie’s normally fucking proud of this space, but Steve’s presence is ruining it. It’s one of the reasons he hates rich people. The world always looks like shit through their eyes. A crease forms between Steve’s eyebrows, an expression Eddie has seen him make several times in the thirty minutes he’s known the guy. “This part is mine!” Robin says, sounding genuinely excited. She’s the only rich person Eddie respects. He cleared out the room directly to the right of the entrance for Robin. It’s slightly smaller than his own, but she agreed to it before she left to spend all of June and July with her mother in California. She said it had better light anyway, which Eddie doesn’t give a fuck about. There’s something twitchy about Steve’s movements. He baby birds his way across the space, like he doesn’t realize he has wings yet. Anxious, which, what the fuck? What did Eddie do to deserve that? Steve’s nose scrunches like he smells something he disapproves of. “I really don’t like this part of the city,” he says and he looks out the window like that proves his point. “Do you have to work here?” Eddie bites the inside of his cheek. He promised Robin he’d play nice, but surely these are extenuating circumstances. “We don’t all have daddy payin’ our bills,” he says with a pout and a lilt that borders on sexual. Just to piss him off. Just to make everyone uncomfortable. Robin blinks a few times fast and shakes her head. Count that as a win. “I don’t…” Steve stutters before collecting himself. “I just want Robin to have a nice place to work.” “And I’d like a pony and a private jet, but we can’t all get what we want,” he says and he really should stop there. But… “Isn’t that right, pretty boy?” He doesn’t even have to wink this time. A blush stretches all the way to Steve’s ears. His eyes deepen from shock to anger like a bruise turning dark purple on day three. Yup. Worth it. “Eddie, could you please just behave,” Robin groans. “We still have to get the rest of my stuff.” “I can help you with that tomorrow,” Steve says, still flushed, but pretending like he isn’t. It’s a sweet offer until he turns to look Eddie up and down and adds: “So we can get out of here now.” “That would be great.” Robin looks up at Steve. “I could really use a drink, you?” There’s those puppy eyes again. Steve’s whole face lights up and he nods quickly. “You coming, Eddie?” She wiggles her fingers at him. “First round on me?” An offer to get drinks with his best friend and this random guy who makes him want to rip his own hair out? Fuck no. He has some sense of self preservation, thank you very much. “I’m just gonna work on my painting for a bit.” Robin rolls her eyes at him before pushing Steve back toward the front door. “Go home on time, okay?” she yells over her shoulder. “The painting’s gonna be here in the morning.” “Yeah, yeah…” He waits by the door until he can no longer hear their footsteps on the stairs. Once he’s confident they’re gone, he grabs the sheet turned blanket from the crate behind his easel. He never bothers with pajamas, just unbuckles his overalls and lets the pants sag around his hips as he sinks into the couch. It’s easier that way. If Robin comes back he can just tell her he was taking a nap. Sweatpants and a sleep shirt would be a dead ringer that sleeping here isn’t just a one off. He’s been doing it since he got evicted in April, but what Robin doesn’t know won’t hurt her.

#steddiebang23 #so so so thrilled #i will do so much infodumping about art in the chapter notes #cant wait!!!#I also think it's one of the best things I've ever written #I put so much time and energy into this #I've never edited something this much #and i think it really shows <3 #cant wait for people to read it!!#if you like excessive descriptions of the painting proces #and also mommy issues #this is the fic for you!!!#steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson

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jacenotjason · 6 months

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hellooo!! helloo!! I have... I have TWO QUESTIONS!! 1. How would each of them react to someone being homophobic/transphobic towards them? 2. uhhh how would they react if they saw their parents? especially the ones that don't like/have never met parents (i was gonna put something else for the second one but uhhh i frogor uh oh)

OH BOY TWO QUESTIONS!! Ok lets all pray Tumblr doenst eat this its gonna be a lot

Ok first question, how would they react to someone being queerphobic to them?

Eddie: “mhm… sure…” he does not care. He deosnt really listen to people in the first place, the second you start trying to offend him he just tones you out. He does not give half a shit. Maybe if you keep talking.. a fuck will fall into his hand!

Poppy: being queerphobic to her?? Eh. Who cares. She lived through a homophobic cult and also bigoted parents, shes got tough skin. Being queerphobic to her children? PREPARE TO CATCH THESE TALONS BIIIITCH

Julie: absolutely roasts you. She takes one look at you and digs up your nastiest trauma some how. Like this “ew a girl dating a girl thats gay (idk how to be homophobic)” “? *looks up and down* okay? I didn’t ask, go tell your mom. Oh, wait shes dead isn’t she? And your father isn’t even present, he left when you were 6 and you had to rely on your Grandfathers homophobic ideology and your Grandmothers abuse. I don’t care what you have to think.” Then the homophobe just lays on the floor in the fetal position.

Sally: “196.251.208.6” get doxxed.

Frank: he just starts crying :( then he goes and tells Eddie and hes gonna stab you

(How do you even be homophobic to someone questioning??) Barnaby: “I know my identity isn’t the root of your anger.. come here, sit down, lets talk it out..” uuuh free therapy? He just summons tea bc all grandpas have the ability to just summon tea

Howdy: i actually have no idea. Ik hes sort of gotten this reputation as violent but hes- guys hes pathetic. He probably just laughs at them and shoos them away, maybe pull the gun from under the counter if he needs to

OK ooo o this ones a little less fun.. if they met their parents

Eddie: quick Eddie lore he was raised in joint custody, his parents hate each other so… uhm.. were getting the gang back together! He’d probably just sit with his face in his hands as his parents fight like “Ohmygod.. guys stop” they blame each other for how Eddie ended up and hes like “Im literally right here”

Poppy: shes long gotten over her fear of her parents. She’s happy and thats all that matters, she’ll happily tell off her parents like a GIRLBOSS YEAAAHHH happily explain how she escaped the cult they sent her too and how happy she is rn

Julie: uhm.. Julie’s parents are dead. Next question. Lmao ok but fr if she like.. came back to life she’d be so happy :3 she, and all the other joyfuls, were raised by a single mom and Julie got all her “men are trash, defend urself, never be afraid to punch a man” type ideology from her mom and her mom was super accepting and she misses herrr :((

Sally: now you may think Sally has a terrible relationship with her parents.. but she doesnt :3 shes unable to see her mom (for agoraphobic, mental health, and also legal reasons) but she loves her a lot. Her mom did sort of raise her in shitty conditions, but Sally doesn’t blame her at all and misses her a lottt wah

Frank: no

Barnaby: ooohh no… so uuh lore for those that dont know, Barnaby’s parents gave him up to the “”””boarding school”””” when he was four and he doesnt remember them. He’d probably be happier then he should to meet them, but most definitely get gaslit by his parents :( like they have what Barnaby thinks is a normal conversation but really isnt.. someone stop it q-p

Howdy: he fuckin loves his dad!! And all his family!!! And he sees them regularly, so itd just be a normal visit

AAA big post ee

Also tumblr didnt eat it thank u tumblr

#welcome home #welcome home au #welcome home opposite au #thanks for the serotonin!#howdy pillar #eddie dear #frank frankly #julie joyful #sally starlet #barnaby b beagle #poppy partridge #poppy ‘ma’ partridge

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kocch · 2 years

Text

when I say that Will being canonically gay in stranger things is the biggest proof we need for byler it’s not simply because we know he is gay and that’s it - there is context that comes from being in fandoms for something like 12 yrs or more.

first of all, I’ve started watching ST because of people talking about will and byler on twitter (in july), as a person who barely knew anything about it (I didn’t even know mike and el were a couple, so I was super surprised they decided to make it romantic in s1 when I didn’t really feel like it would happen).

i was a sherlock fan who shipped sherlock/john. i’ve shipped non-canon couples for a long time (fandom spaces are queer spaces a lot of times). i know what it feels like to read things from a text that could imply things - a text that could be queercoded, depending on interpretation. i know what it feels like to have fun with fanon and ship things that are potentially there, but not textually canon (like steddie or ronance, imo). it’s fun and it’s mostly harmless, until the writers decide to use it as queerbait to make their fandom stay with them for a long time because they’re rooting for their queer ship (i think supernatural is the worst example of this, as they confirmed the one-sided love and then killed the queer character and sent him to hell LMAOOO). those are milking the fandoms, knowing the strongest core of a fandom is the hardcore ones (many queers) and not the casual public.

i’m a big fan of hannibal, yuuri!! on ice and she-ra, three shows that are mostly queercoded until they aren’t (and they confirm the queer ship to be canon). i swear, people CAN tell. you can see when there is a creator and writer and team who truly wants to tell a queer story/relationship, even when they can’t show it openly (like hannibal or yoi). as a person of the community myself, i’ve been able to tell it was canon. it’s different from fans just shipping things, or queerbaiting, there is care and intention and writing and parallels and romantic framing and so many things that make you see that it is there.

(now, for byler i hope it’s different. every straight couple in ST has at least one kiss and i think byler HAS to have at least one (dramatic, passionate, show-stopping) kiss because it would be totally unfair if they don’t. they have to be totally and utterly canon)

what is different about byler and stranger things, compared to sherlock or other shows for the straights?

it’s will being canonically gay. bbc sherlock would never do that. bbc sherlock would mock feelings. he would laugh about love. he would probably be even a bit homophobic, just for the sake of it.

and it’s not just will being canonically gay, it’s his love for mike being canon. i’m sure other people have said it, but will’s love for mike is NOT JUST A CRUSH. it’s not ridiculed. sure, it’s used to forward a straight ship (that is sinking), but the story is not finished yet and i want to believe that byler is endgame and the writing in s4 was meant to 1) leave things uncomplete and unseattled between mike and will, between lies and non-confessed feelings; and will being in the middle of a relationship that is sinking. 2) mike responding to will’s feelings of love and to no one else, not even el begging for him to say he loves her. 3) making EVERYONE AND THEIR MOTHERS feel sorry for will. cry for will. pity will. root for will. root for GAY WILL. (people who think he is straight and he loves el don’t count, those are morons)

will’s love for mike is LOVE in capital letters. it is not a crush. it’s never treated as something to laugh about, or something like a one-sided crush like Dustin’s crush for Max or Steve’s crush for Robin, those feelings are clearly more superficial and you can see that they’re not gonna happen from miles away. will’s love is A LOVE THAT MOVES MOUNTAINS. it’s totally romantic. deeply rooted. it’s like those loves you can see between jancy or lumax or even more jopper in s4, a love that saves one another, that makes people do crazy things, a love that is inherently part of the character, that makes them FEEL and DO and LIVE and you can’t imagine them not being in love with that person.

these writers know how to write that type of love. each canon ship they made (even s1/2 milkvan in some ways), i’ve loved it. they know what they’re doing, how to make it feel like it’s true love even without writing grand love confessions or making them kiss every other episode. it’s in THE NARRATIVE, the things the characters do and say and imply.

and even more, about byler... something i wrote in a fic i’ll never finish but imo it’s the biggest point we can take away from will’s love and confession in s4. WILL SEES MIKE. will sees mike for who he is and loves him anyways. he sees the best and worst in him and still loves him and knows him and grounds him to reality and tells Mike how he could be the best version of himself, pushing him to fight for it (you are the heart). will’s love is ancient and deep, it’s a love that we don’t even know when it started, it’s always been there, it’s always been part of will (and part of mike, because it IS MUTUAL). it’s like breathing. like the sun every morning, it’s just there. it’s not going away. it’s not even a choice, at this point, there is an helplessness in the love will feels - it’s too big and too much for him he would love to run away from it, but still he can’t deny his heart.

and that’s why i think byler is endgame. because will is canonically gay, and he is in love, and no one is making fun of him for that. his love for mike is serious, profound, romantic, genuine. it makes you cry and root for him. it’s LOVE. the strongest of forces. and every byler scene is made with care. it’s never taken lightly, not even their fights, they always matter. there is no mocking in there. no sneer. it’s treated genuinely. almost like the creators are telling you: “look here, look at them, it matters. it matters to them and it should matter to you. there is something serious brewing here, and it is romantic love”

#byler #personal #mike wheeler #hello i'm a romantic #idk if i already expressed these things in other posts or tags bc i cant remember what i say in here and i waht i simply think and it's bee #two months of me thinking about them so i'm sure these idea have evolved with time and i'm still digesting them fjhrfijrh #but yeah. YEAH.#will byers #i just think will's love for mike is neat and mike's love for will is even more neat #this is probably me thinking and digesting 200 analysis posts i've read in weeks but also AHHH I NEED TO SCREAM #irbgrig9tu #me pretending to be media literate as a queer kid who has consumed and fantasized about queer ship for 2/3 of their lives #no but for real i finished watching st s4 and i felt: wow. this is differnet. this has the potential to be groundbreaking and the duffers #could become icons in mainstream media just for making them happen. wow will is canonically gay in a show that is THAT BIG? in a bro-media?#it's a bro-coded genre and they're gay??? ?WILL IS GAY??? WHAT IS GOING ON #i was a confused queer for a whole two days #My st talks

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darlin-djarin · 1 year

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i should sleep but i need to talk about the skywalker family and their chromosomes

it starts out a little silly but i promise i get deadass once i start talking about luke and how he was born.

now, it all starts with anakin.

anakin had no father, his mother birthed him like he was jesus (jesus intersex representation?? 😨 that’s another story) and she could only give him X chromosomes. that means either anakin didn’t have chromosomes, he had two X chromosomes, or he had just one X chromosome. considering his mother birthing him and his fatherlessness (loser), it’s most likely that he had a single X chromosome. therefore he was intersex.

now he probably still had cock and balls (derogatory), otherwise he couldn’t have had kids with padme. if the jedi order had a sex ed class (they probably did tbh), then anakin would probably know or realize that he only had one X chromosome, and therefore he realized he’s intersex.

as much as i love the idea of non-binary anakin- let’s be real guys. anakin would be those types of dudes who, when asked what their pronouns are, would answer with “nor/mal”. people would mention his beauty or his feminine demeanor and he’d be like “i’m not gay”. or something like that. i’m projecting my homophobic brother’s personality onto him. they’re very similar and i’m not particularly fond of either of them. at least, not anakin in the prequel movies.

my big boy chad master anakin in the clone wars had ultimate lightskin rizz.

anyway so onto luke.

it gets serious here.

since anakin only had one X chromosome, and padme had XX, then both of them contributed an X chromosome to their children. they literally couldn’t be able to make a biological male child. if they did end up having a male child, they would either have to be also intersex, or trans.

leia and luke were both born with XX chromosomes.

“but olly! in the movies, they said luke was a boy when he was born!” ah wonderful observation, my silly little padawan.

obviously star wars “humans” aren’t clearly “humans”, rather aliens as well. so likely their biology might differ from irl. but if we were to ignore that and consider all the possibilities, we could come up with a logical explanation.

obviously the technology in the star wars universe is very advanced, at least more advanced than the options we have available. i think the topic of gender and sexuality isn’t even a real thing in the universe. gender is a social construct, right? and clearly with the different aliens, races, and religions in the universe, the discussion of what “gender” is wouldn’t technically apply anywhere because gender isn’t real.

back to the technology part- i’d like to think the universe at that time would be able to find out a child’s “gender” or orientation by examining their brain when they are born. according to this study by Dr. Julie Bakker in how trans peoples brains correspond with the gender they identify as, regardless of how they were born, it can be understood that even from a young age, trans people think and process the same way cis people would within their respective identity/gender.

i think it would make the most sense that when luke and leia were born, they were given brain scans or something of the sort to determine what their gender/identity would be, regardless of how they were biologically born.

therefore we get luke’s “gender reveal” in the movies, even though he was likely born as a biological female.

basically trans luke is canon, y’all are just cowards.

so the whole skywalker family only have X chromosomes. until we get to ben solo. because of Han’s Y chromosome, ben would’ve been born as a cis male (derogatory).

that’s why he became evil. it’s bc his whole family is trans and he was kicked out for being cis.

hope this made sense

#ty lio for endorsing my silliness and goofiness #i’m dead serious about this tho #star wars #star wars headcanons #would this be a headcanon?? if it’s technically true?#star wars shitpost #anakin skywalker #luke skywalker #leia organa #padme amidala #han solo #ben solo #kylo ren #trans luke skywalker #anakin skywalker is intersex you can’t change my mind #keeping up with the skywalkers #shmi skywalker #extra virgin olive oil #oil.

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chaifootsteps · 5 months

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It’s almost not funny anymore seeing Viv fly off the handle over random Twitter users having even mildly negative opinions about her show. It just paints a deeply sad and almost tragic—if you leave out the part where she’s awful and did this to herself—picture of a person in free fall. As other anons have pointed out, she’s running around the glove on these expensive vacations, constantly treating herself, basically living in a dream world. And yet she’s still fixated on the opinions of people who ought to be inconsequential to her. Getting more and more unhinged by the day.

I can’t say I necessarily have sympathy for her? Like I said she’s pretty much got no one but herself to blame. But it’s objectively kind of sad just how far she’s fallen, and Hazbin isn’t even out yet. She had everything once, and it’s all slipping away from her now because she lacks the basic human decency to be good to the people around her.

I think part of her kind of sees the writing on the wall, but her ego is just so overwhelming that it drowns out whatever logic or common sense she’s got left. That’s why she’s lashing out more and more. Her sandcastle is eroding more and more by the day and she doesn’t know what to do, so she just keeps lashing out and hoping if she ignores the problem it’ll go away.

Key word being almost for me, but yeah, I agree. If she were slightly less awful, had slightly less power, it would be pretty sad.

She's gotten away with this for a lot longer than most people would have, and I think you're right, that at least part of her knows the salad days are coming to an end. She probably knows better than anyone else how bad things are, the exact details of Hazbin's troubled production, and is trying to live it up while she can -- before January, before July, before the NDAs start expiring. But even on a dream vacation to Japan with her friends, she can't resist angrily tweeting about a video that poked extremely lighthearted fun at her shows.

She could turn it all around tonight if she could just break away from the voices telling her what she's always wanted to hear, that she's gifted and brilliant and that all her critics are unfunny homophobic prudes who hate women. But she doesn't want to do that.

#Anonymous #vivziepop #vivziepop critical #actual blog post

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youcouldmakealife · 5 months

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LBTE: Jared (128-129)

The fucking Scouts, man. And we end the Jared on the move arc. Next up: Bryce on the move arc!

If you want to read along, series page is here.

128. Outclassed

Jared drives home half-asleep, finds a very sleepy Bryce on the couch waiting up for him.

“Go to bed,” Jared says, pokes him up to their room and then follows suit.

Bryce wanted to stay up and celebrate with him. In reality he just ended up getting poked into bed in the two minutes before they were both snoozing.

He wakes up at ten-forty five — the latest he’s gotten up since the postseason started — to a kiss to the forehead, a cup of coffee handed to him, the immediate awareness that the Nucks did it, they’ve got at least another round to battle through. As ways to wake up go, it’s pretty fucking great.

Bryce is so good at husbanding, especially now that it’s his offseason: full time husband and covert Canucks fan until training starts.

Bryce isn’t offended by Jared living hockey, and it’s actually helpful as hell to have him right there beside him. Bryce watches the earlier Avs games with him, arm slung over Jared’s shoulder, making smart observations, has advice for Jared before and after every game. It’s like having a game tape coach and a husband all in one, it’s terrific.

Full time husband. Hockey smarts included.

It’s a hard fought, ugly series that takes a few of the Canucks with it, Dmitry unfortunately one of them — Jared guesses the line’s still cursed, though he’s selfishly glad he’s not the latest to fall victim to that — but the Canucks scrape out a win in seven, and they’re going to the Western Conference Finals, which is an incredible fucking feeling.

Yay!

Jared can’t say he’s surprised by who they’re going to be facing.

He can’t say he’s particularly pleased about it either.

Such a quick fall from yay.

“Okay,” Bryce says. “Here’s the lowdown about the Scouts.”

“Fuck the Scouts?” Jared says.

“Fuck the Scouts,” Bryce says. “But seriously.”

I mean, basically.

And then Jared’s getting something that isn’t quite a rant but is basically an insider report on pretty much all of the Scouts, because Bryce is clearly still pissed about that series, and he’s got a MENSA level hockey IQ. He was up against the first line, which Jared isn’t going to be facing much if at all, but he was apparently paying very close attention on the bench as well, and at a certain point Jared starts taking literal notes on his phone, trying to keep up.

When holding grudges comes in handy.

“Hey!” Jared says, torn from strategy. “You talking about my new Premier?”

“Holy fuck,” Stephen says after a moment. “No offence but if you voted for him him I’m kicking you out of our house right now.”

Jared takes no offence. “Obviously I didn’t fucking vote for him,” Jared says. “Dude’s a corrupt megalomaniac with an oil rig where his heart should be.”

We now interrupt your story for political propaganda. But like — from a policy standpoint, every statement here is accurate, up to and including the oil rig heart (Jason Kenney resigned in disgrace only to be replaced by someone worse somehow -- the conservative way -- and is now on the board of directors of an energy company. No one could have possibly foreseen this.)

“Are we talking about Kenney?” Bryce complains. “Politics are boring.”

“Politics are how we were able to get married, B,” Jared says,

Of note that Jason Kenney was virulently homophobic.

(He still is, I'm sure, but now he isn’t making homophobic policy decisions -- that’s the job of his successor!)

“These kids,” Gabe says to Stephen. “Bet they don’t even remember when gay marriage was legalised.”

“I do,” Bryce protests. “Sort of.”

Jared shrugs. “I was a little kid?” he says. “I wasn’t really paying attention.”

Jared once again hurting Stephen with his youth. Gay marriage was legalized in Canada in July 2005. Jared was 6. Bryce 9. Gabe and Stephen 14.

“Get out of my house,” Stephen says, but he says that all the time, and Jared no longer listens to him. Well, he probably genuinely meant it if Jared was a UCP supporter, but obviously Jared isn’t — he was raised by hobgoblins, not actual monsters. “Now let’s do Ford.”

God, let’s not — I’ll be here all fucking week.

“While I enjoy trashing Doug Ford as much as the next Ontarian,” Gabe says.

Not so much that they didn’t vote for more! Not going to lie, I’m still coping pretty hard with the fact the majority of my fellow Ontarians either voted for this guy a second time, or didn’t bother to get off their asses because his opponents weren’t ‘inspiring’. Is that on the Ontario Libs and NDP too? Yep. On ‘Rae Days’ BS and Liberals always talking strategic voting, but only if that means NDP voters vote for them? Sure. But for fuck’s sakes, everyone who didn’t vote essentially cast a ballot for everything Ford has done since, including the multi-billion dollar racketeering he’s being investigated for by the RCMP. But Rae Days.

Okay. Off my soap box.

“Stephen’s a lot,” Bryce says, all blink-y about it. Stephen isn’t even being extra Stephen, he’s just normal level Stephen, but then, Jared probably has a higher tolerance for snide, since he so often is himself.

Inoculation!

Though you’d think Bryce would be used to it too, considering who he’s married to. Maybe he’s just got immunity to Jared’s particular brand of it after enough exposure.

Jared and Stephen are similarly snide but not identically, Bryce only has Jared immunity. He gets very blink-y around Julius too. I’d say he has Erin immunity too but Erin isn’t even a hobgoblin with Bryce unless he dares suggest she and Jared have any similarities whatsoever, in which case she proves his point for him by getting extremely huffy about it just like Jared does.

“I believed you,” Bryce protests. “But he’s so — mean. He told me my hair was stupid.”

The first time Stephen calls Bryce’s hair Disney Prince hair. Bryce hasn’t realised it’s a compliment, as Stephen says it in a mean voice.

“His hair’s stupid,” Bryce mutters. “And he called me a cradle robber! And kept calling me Coach Bryce!”

I mean…

Jared was there for that, but he thought it was more because Bryce was like, coaching them through strategy. In hindsight it is more likely Stephen pointing out that Bryce was, in fact, Jared’s coach when they met, albeit tenuously. Jared really never should have told Stephen that. He’s never going to let it go.

Jared also understands a little better why Bryce scowled at him when Jared joined Stephen in calling him Coach Bryce.

Still fucking dying that Jared accidentally joined Stephen in roasting Bryce.

“You make a very good coach though,” Jared says, putting a soothing hand on Bryce’s arm.

Bryce scowls.

He knows you’re about say something mean, Jared, he’s been inoculated!

“Just don’t sleep with any other prospects, I’d be super—” Jared breaks off to protect himself from a half-tackle from Bryce, laughing as Bryce gets a jab in to his side.

Jared’s true love language: play wrestling.

“No PDA on the Markson-Petersen property,” Stephen says.

Jared opens his mouth, considering Gabe kissed Stephen right in front of them like twenty minutes ago. Bryce went adorably pink about it.

Literally the first time Bryce has personally witnessed two guys kissing (I mean, not involving him, obvs), and it’s people he KNOWS. Low key a big moment for him.

“He’s so mean,” Bryce mumbles. “That wasn’t even PDA, I wrestle with Chaz all the time.”

Jared would raise an eyebrow, but he thinks he’d get tackled again. Plus he also used to wrestle with Chaz all the time. Chaz loves a good wrestling match. Jared’s wrestling matches with Chaz have a distinctly different tenor to them than his grappling with Bryce, particularly when Bryce decides he isn’t going to let Jared win. Stephen was maybe not off about the PDA part.

Chaz’s love language is also play wrestling, but not like that. Bro love. Bruv.

Jared hears a lock click, though he’s not too worried. Gabe will intercede if he has to.

Spoken like someone who has frequently locked doors on his little sister, who had to be let in by Don or Susan. Or been locked out by said sister. Or, you know, the time they were both locked out by their mother so they couldn’t eavesdrop on Bryce asking for their blessing. A family affair.

“I know,” Jared says. It’d be bad walking into a series thinking you didn’t.

“We didn’t,” Bryce says.

Another win for the brain to mouth filter!

The Scouts are a juggernaut, but the Canucks are no slouch either.

The Scouts are better.

Every fucking time. Dynasties, man. (They haven’t even won their first Cup at this point; they’re going to be so much more annoying when they’re winning their third.)

Jared hopes it’s the Caps and Raf scores the game winning goal and does a fly by giving the finger to Williams and Simcoe. That doesn’t sound like a particularly Raf move

Robbie, though…

…but Jared’s not exactly being reasonable right now, all raw scraped nerves and hurt and a fucked up shoulder from a hard hit by Angelopoulos that probably should have sidelined him, but didn’t because it was the playoffs.

The first injury of Jared by a main cast member from a different series. But not the last.

Jared does his stupid painful exercises for the stiffness, gets out of packing anything because, well, shoulder, so it’s Bryce who’s doing it while Jared supervises and occasionally insults his packing decisions just to get that huffy Bryce sigh.

Yet another love language: intentionally bugging Bryce.

Jared’s in his parents’ kitchen with Erin when he hears the whoop from the living room, Bryce and his dad, mom lost under how loud they are, and him and Erin shuffle out to watch the Caps surge over the boards to dogpile their goalie.

Bryce and Don bonding on Team Fuck the Scouts.

Grace is clutch, and the group chat has a number of pictures of the partying the next morning. There’s a picture of Raf and Chapman looking absolutely shitfaced and more than half-asleep that’s particularly good, and Jared makes sure to save it for the purpose of mockery. Another very unflattering one Raf and Kurmazov the Senior, and Jared saves that one to send to Dmitry so he may use it for the purposes of mockery.

Look, Jared’s putting aside his feelings for Dmitry to help him be an annoying little brother, bless. Also that picture of Raf and David is adorable.

the salve of falling asleep in the same bed, of Bryce hitting his alarm immediately and trying to sneak around in the mornings so he doesn’t wake Jared up, Jared pretending he’s still asleep so Bryce doesn’t feel guilty, Bryce probably pretending he actually thinks Jared’s asleep

The softest game of deception devised since peek-a-boo.

129. Sabbatical

Summer’s — summer’s summer.

Very eloquent, Jared. (He doesn’t know how to describe the bone deep relief he feels falling asleep with and waking up beside Bryce, mixed with the grunt work of training, tempered by the fact he’s doing it with some of his favourite people, and they all get to hang out together after(!), Jared has a friend group(!) but also he’s not playing hockey which low key makes everything feel kind of off. So. Summer’s summer.)

Grace has cut her hair really short, and Raf’s done the opposite, letting his grow out, and Ash got a tattoo — her and Bryce bitch about the pain for a bit — but they’re basically all the same as they were a year ago, all feel like home to him even though Calgary only gets to be home in the offseason.

Grace looks great, Raf looks low-key terrible (Cup. Parties. plus the whole road to the Cup in the first place, man is battered.) and Ashley’s tattoo is fire. Not literally, thank fuck; that’d definitely make Chaz getting traded more awkward.

Jared goes up to Edmonton to visit Julius when he pops in for a week for dumb media stuff

I like that it’s completely unclear whether that’s Jared editorializing with ‘dumb media stuff’, or if Julius has been referring to it that way himself.

while Bryce has a ridiculous staycation thing with Erin — that’s code for renting a hotel suite all of a couple blocks from Bryce and Jared’s place for no purpose other than splashing around the pool, and Erin dragging Bryce from store to store and Bryce not even looking at price tags before handing the cashier his credit card, but Bryce was insistent on Erin getting something for her high school graduation, so whatever. Jared and Julius do absolutely nothing while Jared’s there except eat and watch TV and bitch about media and tell each other when they find something funny on the internet. It’s great.

The First Time Erin Makes Twitter Incoming. And Julius and Jared entirely oblivious in Edmonton (this is before Erin and Julius get together, for the record)

It’s honestly such a sweet thing for Bryce to do for Erin’s graduation, and frankly it sucks that it blows up in his face. Bryce did nothing wrong! (For once, says Dave.)

After their anniversary — Bryce buys him too much as usual, Jared does too this year, most currently living in a box in their closet that Bryce goes slightly pink looking at, and he looks often

Jared’s stinginess once again not applying to sex toys, which Bryce appreciates.

— they fly back so Jared can sign the lease and move some stuff out of Elaine’s and and Bryce can visit with Elaine and Gordie and Gail for a bit, do some early birthday stuff with them.

This is the other half of the sex toy sentence, what a fucking segue, Jared. Sex toy reference right before wholesome times with the Marcuses.

Jared’s new apartment is in a good location, not far from Gabe and Stephen’s house, which is pretty much perfectly placed between the practice rink, arena, and airport.

It's in Shaughnessy. Canucks practice at the University of British Columbia (they don’t have their own practice facilities). Triangulation was not by distance, but average commute in traffic and not in traffic (yes, he made the drives, and yes, he bought a real life stop watch and Stephen made fun of him incessantly for this. Does he not have a stop watch on his phone? Come on Gabriel. Gabe would argue, correctly, that he should not be on his phone while driving).

Also he fudged his results and picked somewhere closer to UBC because Stephen was going there at the time, or he would have likely gone for Mt Pleasant or South Main. Stephen is aware. Gabe is aware Stephen is aware. It is not discussed. They like their house, no plans on moving.

Getting a house around there will run you a couple million bucks, because Vancouver, so Jared, known opposite of a big spender, has decided to rent an apartment.

Jared can absolutely see Gabe doing that. Appreciates that Gabe did that. Jared was just google mapping it, Gabe’s test seems like better data.

He FUDGED THE DATA FOR LOVE, JARED. IT IS ALL A LIE.

He likes his place, likes it better when Bryce is in it, helping him put together a dining room table he’ll probably never use,

I am not sure if this dining room table even appears in the story again, it is so underutilized. Generally they eat on the couch (or at the kitchen island, but that's just coffee and breakfast, mostly). If paperwork needs to be done it gets used. That's about it.

“You are literally going to spend the next two days with me,” Jared says when Bryce looks particularly kicked puppy as Jared packs his laptop, which was an anniversary present he did not actually need. At least Erin appreciated getting Jared’s barely even past warranty old one as a university present.

Bold of you to assume that wasn’t Bryce’s plan all along so you aren’t all ‘you can’t buy Erin a laptop, Bryce’, ‘you’ve given Erin more than enough already, Bryce’, ‘stop buying my horrible sister things, Bryce’.

“I can pout whenever I want to, you’re not the boss of me,” Bryce mutters.

“That’s not true,” Jared says. Jared is very much the boss of him and they both know it.

Bryce appreciated his anniversary gifts.

“Nope,” Jared says when Bryce’s hands start creeping under his shirt. “I need to get this done, I don’t want to get halfway to Vancouver before I realise I forgot something important.”

“Flames are going to be in Vancouver in two weeks,” Bryce says.

“No guarantee you’d be playing that game,” Jared says.

“If I’m not I could send it with Chaz,” Bryce says, and before Jared can protest that Chaz might not either, “Canucks are in Calgary right after too.”

Jared doesn’t know if it’s Bryce being stubbornly logical or the fact that Bryce said all of that while unbuttoning and unzipping Jared’s shorts that sways him. Obviously a combination.

‘Keep talking workarounds for possible setbacks, baby, that’s so hot’. But like. Unironically.

After the first leg of the trip they land up in the best hotel you can get in the dead land between Revelstoke and Kamloops, which is not saying much

It’s in Sicamous and it’s a Best Western.

Mere years ago he was lucky if it was a hotel instead of a motel and he was stuck with an asshole roommate who talked in his sleep, and now he’s turning his nose up at a three star hotel.

It’s technically a four star, Jared, you gigantic snob. Also it looks nice enough, honestly, so either it’s been renovated and upped a star since I checked, or I was being lazy in my Revelstoke to Kamloops accommodations due diligence.

“How hard will you judge me if I ask to get back in the car and keep driving?” Bryce asks. “Because Salmon Arm has a decent hotel.”

“How far’s Salmon Arm?” Jared asks.

“Twenty minutes, half an hour?” Bryce says.

Salmon Arm does NOT have a four star hotel. This is a downgrade from that Best Western in Sicamous. As it is now. Possibly not back when I was doing research.

Bryce waits in the car when Jared gets their room, which ends up being a really fucking good call because the front desk clerk is clearly a big Canucks fan, recognises Jared before he even hands her his credit card. Jared texts Bryce a frantic ‘shelter in place’, getting a bunch of question marks in reply, and then he has to go out and sneak him in a side entrance lest he have to explain why he’s sharing a room with one king bed with The Enemy, so that’s great. This is a great trip. Jared’s really enjoying this trip.

THIS is a non chain inn. It’s kind of dated, but like, fine.

“Quit grumbling and tell me what you want from room service,” Bryce yawns.

Jared quits grumbling long enough to order a club sandwich, then resumes grumbling.

I genuinely remember looking at a room service menu for accuracy but now there is no room service. So either I am making this all up or they’ve gone downhill. But then, this was written in 2020, when more places may have had room service for pandemic related reasons. It DOES have an in house restaurant, unlike all other Salmon Arm-y places, so it very possibly did offer room service.

This is bothering me now. I am bothered. Petty grudge against Salmon Arm unlocked.

“Summers gave me a few excuses if things were like, asked,” Bryce says. “Mutual friends with Chaz, met years ago at a camp and still hang out, stuff like that.”

“That’s all true, though,” Jared says.

“Yeah but isn’t like, ‘we’re super in love’,” Bryce says. “Which I think was the part Summers wants to avoid.”

Dave has very low expectations about Bryce’s ability to make up a story, and I think that is extremely fair, to be honest.

“Would you be cool with me coming out to my team?” Jared says. “Not like the level of what Gabe knows or anything, just like, not hiding the fact I married a dude.”

Bryce is quiet. “Can I think about it?” he asks finally.

“Yeah,” Jared says.

“I know you — you can come out to anyone you want to, that’s like, your right,” Bryce says.

“I know,” Jared says.

“I need to think about it,” Bryce says.

This is so much progress! Bryce not reflexively saying no! Bryce acknowledging that Jared has autonomy in how he represents himself to others! Actually thinking about it!

“Yeah but I’m a BC boy now,” Jared says.

“I’m a BC boy,” Bryce mutters.

“Nope,” Jared says. “We swapped.”

“You can’t just be a BC boy,” Bryce says, sounding genuinely agitated. “You have to earn it. And you can’t be a BC boy: you don’t even like sushi.”

I love you and the things that bother you, Bryce Marcus.

“Your teammates,” Bryce says, and Jared looks up from his phone. “If you want to tell them you can. Like. The husband thing not the—”

“Not the you being my husband bit,” Jared assures him.

“Okay,” Bryce says, blows out a breath, then another one.

“You sure?” Jared asks.

Bryce takes a hand off the steering wheel to give Jared a so-so.

PROGRESS!!!

“Can we take this exit?” he asks.

“Uh,” Jared says. “We’re like an hour away.”

Bryce gives him a glance.

“I told you to piss when we got lunch,” Jared mutters.

“And you were right and I was wrong,” Bryce mutters back.

Married. Also — end of yet another arc.

#liveblogging the end

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sherlockianscholar · 24 days

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part 2 (1991-1995): the saga of jeremy brett through the scuttlebutt archives

go here for part one!

since 1971, sherlockian and baker st irregular, peter blau has published a small "gossip" sheet for all sherlock holmes news under publication of the "Scuttlebutt from the Spermaceti Press." after the advent of computers, peter started digitizing all his sheets from 1985 onward.

we are now officially in the later stage of granada's sherlock holmes. production was driven by the desire to make large profits. thus, the quality of the show took a significant dip. our only remaining constants were jeremy and edward. but their acting stood strong even through significant trials and tribulations. by 1991, jeremy's health (mentally and physically) would continue to worsen dramatically, which ultimately led to his death in 1995.

March 1991: mmmm, not sure he's joking there

October 1991: jeremy finally commits to doing all of the stories

January 1992: first of all, Y I K E S. this is so messed up and homophobic to sherlock holmes. why, because of his usual celibacy?and "to the relief of fans who have wondered about his bachelor lifestyle." what the fuck.

this might be reading too much into it, but i think it might've been a jab at jeremy's sexuality. He had (at least) two long-term homosexual relationships: gary bond (1969-1976) and paul shenar (~1973-1978). while jeremy never publicly came out as bisexual, his relationship with gary bond was considered "one of the first relatively out" couples in the acting world. at least in the industry, it was common knowledge.

now i'm going to wildly speculate, so here goes. jeremy and joan married in 1976, which is also when jeremy and gary bond broke up. it's unknown how long jeremy and joan dated prior to their wedding. reportedly, jeremy dated paul shenar from 1973-1978 (and they remained close friends until paul died of aids in 1989), which overlaps with jeremy and joan's marriage. jeremy and joan spent a lot of time apart, with her in the usa and him in manchester. now, i don't think jeremy would EVER cheat on joan. but, i wonder if they had an open relationship (or maybe some form of polyamory). mind you, i have nothing to back that up, but it's something i've wondered about before.

circa 1993: this is the earliest article i've been able to find on jeremy's mental illness, which still makes me wonder when his difficulties became public. the details of his psychotic break in this article are heartbreaking to read.

as stated prior, linda pritchard (the interviewee) was jeremy's companion/probable girlfriend for the last seven years of his life. they met backstage during the secret of sherlock holmes. linda approached jeremy for help raising money for cancer research, which he naturally supported with a passion. she nursed and took care of him. she provided life-saving mental support and no matter how painful or how much jeremy's bipolar lashed out, she made sure he felt safe and loved. she's kind of controversial because she's written a lot of books about jeremy. firstly, she doesn't actually profit off them at all--she just wants to share jeremy's story. and at the end of the day, who cares? that woman loved and protected jeremy during the most vulnerable chapter of his life. she was there till the end. she will always have my respect.

March 1993: okay, sean day-lewis, you have no idea what you're talking about and your views are bad.

June 1993: we have 1 hour episodes back! but it's too little, too late.

July 1993: happy birthday, young michael! according to the sherlock holmes society of st. charles, "jeremy became very fond of the young boy by his side and they corresponded for many years. his father was one of the leaders of the chester baskerville society and editor of the devonshire chronicle."

on a heavier note, this is the beginning of the end. jeremy's health began slipping faster and faster. as did the the future of granada's sherlock holmes. once again, what could've been if jeremy hadn't gotten ill?

September 1993: okay, so there's a lot to unpack here.

firstly, they label jeremy as "a heavy drinker." this is the only thing/quote i know of that could approach that statement:

"i started drinking champagne as a kind of celebration to lift my spirits. it started with just a glass in my bath, and grew until i needed a whole bottle to put me to sleep at nights. well, that was getting entirely out of hand, and it had to stop." -jeremy brett during the beginning of granada

but i don't think that really spells out "heavy drinker" or "alcoholic."

secondly, jeremy's physical illness has become extremely noticeable and is officially out of the bag. but not the specifics. "jeremy brett has been struck down by a crippling illness." he "was taking medication for most of the day and at one stage had an oxygen mask to help him breathe." jeremy is now "suffering from pleurisy," which a granada spokesperson "confirmed" was true. but they were only the symptoms of a far greater problem--jeremy's heart disease and the lithium poisoning/complications that led to it.

November 1993 #1: and now we're calling it an "asthma attack." again, stating a symptom, but failing to understand how that piece fits into the big picture.

November 1993 #2: the big picture is revealed (except for the key piece of info--that this was because of the lithium). granada's june wyndham-davies (and presumably the rest of the major staff) remained publicly optimistic.

December 1993

February 1994

Spring 1994: JEREMY BRETT BREAKS HIS CONTRACT WITH GRANADA

March 1994: another psych ward stay. although it says that jeremy had a "nervous breakdown" in 1986, it's highly probable that it was actually a psychotic break. i believe the quote below is about the article cited above, but i'm not certain b/c i don't have an exact date for this quote nor do i have the article in question:

"i went there to pick him up, and two tabloid newspaper men, from the sun, had actually been clever enough to use his real name at the door, which is jeremy huggins. they went up to his bedroom where he was waiting for me, burst in with a camera, and said, 'we have come to see if you have got aids.' he kicked them out." -june wyndham-davies

April 1994: "i have bounced back like bambi," said brett. "i'm as fit as a fiddle, though still a little fragile." if only...

his second psych ward stay in a month. jeremy's lithium poisoning becomes public. (i'm on lithium! which literally saved my life. when i was first prescribed it, a nurse actually sat me down to make sure i knew how serious potential complications could be if i didn't adhere to exactly what the doctors told me. that never happened with any other medication.)

when the very last episode of jeremy brett's sherlock holmes premiered: "after completing 'the cardboard box', jeremy brett was back in the hospital--a mental hospital. in his own self-effacing way he called it 'the nuthouse.' when the memoirs was screened in britain, the man who was sherlock holmes failed to see his own last series because he was in a ward where the other patients preferred to watch another station. jeremy brett deferred to their choice of viewing." -david stuart davies from bending the willow

June 1994: jeremy continues to remain optimistic

December 1994: even though jeremy was incredibly ill, he decided to try and continue acting as best he could. "after mad dogs and englishmen, he had to renounce the fine projects proposed to him: the role of ebenezer scrooge at the national theater with a script by john mortimer, a season in chichester and the role of professor higgins in a new version of my fair lady. he hoped to at least to be the voice of a deer or an elephant in a future disney cartoon, but even this modest ambition proved impossible." (ACD encyclopedia)

can you even imagine how delightful jeremy would've been as a disney character? that would've been priceless.

January 1995: at this point, i believe jeremy began to realize he was dying

February 1995: jeremy is "on the mend"

July 1995: jeremy is forcibly retired from acting

September between 3rd-11th 1995: jeremy's doctor told him that he needed a heart transplant. jeremy's reply, “that's too dramatic, darling, even for me.”

September 12, 1995: peter jeremy huggins dies at the age of 61

“bless your darling hearts. much love, keep warm and dry and if you see him whisking around the corner – you know who, SH – then wave, because that’s all you’ll see of him. bless his darling heart, isn’t he wonderful, streets ahead of us – still.” -jeremy brett, 1995

and bless your darling heart, jeremy. thank you for everything.

#sherlock holmes #jeremy brett #granada #edward hardwicke #michael cox #june wyndham-davies #granada holmes #long post #bending the willow #granada meta #scuttlebutt from the spermaceti press #peter blau #bipolar #mental illness #part 2 #original post

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