Everything in the Amazon lotr series makes perfect sense when you learn that the show runners have literally no experience working on tv shows. None. 😂 J.D. Payne and Patrick McKay have barely any experience in the entertainment industry. And like if you check their IMDb, their only credits are a Flash Gordon screenplay for a movie that wasn’t made and “uncredited” writing on the 2016 Star Trek movie (meaning they weren’t an official part of the production but talked to J J Abrams every now and then.)
The only way I can praise the Amazon show is the way you’d praise something written by a kid…”like wow this is your first try? Your first time ever working in tv and writing a fantasy story? This is good for a first try! Nice work! Your mom should hang it on the fridge!” The real question though is like, why didn’t they give biggest budget of any tv series ever made to people who had literally ANY experience showrunning ahsjndndnd.
To be honest I’m baffled at people who say this show is “desecrating tolkien” because like…first off, desecrating tolkien can be super cool. He sucked sometimes. Second, “desecrating tolkien” implies they were creating a story that had something specific to say about Tolkien, and they knew how to use their medium to convey what they wanted to say. But like…they didn’t. The Amazon series can’t desecrate tolkien, it’s relying on tolkien as a crutch to tell an amateur story that would be literally totally incoherent without you filling in the blanks with prior knowledge gained from the books and from other better adaptations.
I’m baffled at people trying to act like Amazon is being progressive with this series when its sorta like…the peak of conservative Hollywood nepotism? Two upper middle-class white dudes with literally no idea how to run a tv show because they have never been part of the process, ever, were gift wrapped the highest budget for any tv show ever made— not because they deserved to make the most expensive tv series ever made, but because they were upper middle class white dudes who happened to know famous people in Hollywood. People work in television their whole lives for the chance to be a showrunner and these two mediocre white dudes who have barely done any professional writing were handed the most expensive tv series of all time.
And it shows! It explains why the show doesn’t feel as expensive as it is. The process was “run” by people who literally have never needed to understand how creating a tv show works.
Everything feels so clumsy, unfocused, and generic because it’s being showrun by people who do not have enough experience to know what they’re doing.
It feels like someone’s first published work because it is. there’s some vague generic theme about being corrupted by darkness but it’s portrayed with all the grace and subtlety of showrunners who have no experience telling stories professionally, don’t understand how to do it, and so are just turning to the audience and flatly saying what the themes are supposed to be in bland boring language. (They couldn’t even find relevant quotes from the books to use instead— at least then it would sound pretty. Tolkein’s language is almost entirely absent from the show. :P)
There’s a lack of specificity— the tone veers wildly from “epic and idealized like the Pj films” to “relentlessly gory and cruel like GOT,” and almost no quotes from the books appear in the show despite language being so important to the feel of middle earth— because the showrunners are too busy struggling to learn the basics of showrunning for the first time to figure out things like “how to set a consistent tone.”
Characters turn to the camera and spoon-feed the audience information like we’re stupid and constantly reiterate exposition from previous episodes because the show runners have never worked on tv shows before, and don’t have enough confidence to trust the audience to understand anything.
The pacing is so bizarre and wonky, and the introductions of important characters/McGuffins is so clumsy, because the showrunners have never done this before ever on any tv show.
The show doesn’t look like the most expensive tv show of all time (even though it is) because the show runners don’t understand how to budget visual effects effectively. Tons of expensive labor is wasted on dream sequences and meaningless one-off plot beats that don’t add anything to the story when they could’ve been spent on the actual important emotional story moments.
And of course the way the show handles gender and race is so hollow because it’s driven by two white male nepotism hires tackling these topics for the Very First Time. They decide to handle sexism in middle earth by making it a world where patriarchy just doesn’t seem to exist(?), but they’re also not willing to actually genuinely imagine what that would look like. so we get a world where “there’s no patriarchy” but most the warriors/leaders are still men, all the women still dress in feminine clothing/hairstyles and all the men have masculine clothing/hairstyles, no women are butch and no men are effeminate, a woman fighting/showing up in battle armor is framed as a big cool reveal, and every single relationship is suffocatingly heterosexual (and there isn’t even the possibility of queer relationships/homoerotic subtext.) They had three POC play some of the side characters but were careless in how they handled them, in a way that’s a disservice to the talented actors— for example the character they marketed as “the first black elf in tolkien” is immediately thrown into a plotline where people are racist to him for being an elf and then he’s captured into slavery and spends a few episodes in chains driven around by white orcs with whips in a way that makes you realize the creators were too white to think about the optics of this. They also don’t tackle the root issues with the way tolkein portrayed race (the idea that different races are different Species with immutable personality traits) and just take his racist assumptions for granted. Meanwhile, every scene where people are “fantasy racist” against white blonde Galadriel for being an elf is handled with all the grace of a white teenager who just realized racism was maybe Bad writing their first fiction story saying Deep Things About Society for a high school assignment. Can you imagine how much more thoughtful writing we would’ve gotten from literally ANY of the far more talented experienced female and poc directors in Hollywood, people who understood how to tackle gender/race in their writing and who understood how to actually run a show? But no, the show has to be handed to two white dudes who have literally no experience writing for tv and no relevant credits, just because they’re white men who are well connected, and we have to trust tHese people to condescendingly explain the importance of diversity to us like we’re children. And then we have to pretend to like it because theres a massive right wing backlash against the show for being “so woke” (when it isn’t). ANSJSJJDJDJD
I just kinda…don’t understand? Why give so much money to people who have no experience and don’t know what they’re doing? People whose only qualifications are being random white dudes who know famous people?
It feels like such a waste of money and resources to throw so much into what’s essentially a training exercise for people who’ve never run a show before. The Amazon series is longer than the first two PJ films but it doesn’t feel that way because the showrunners don’t understand how to use a medium they have never worked in.
Like Peter Jackson had never directed anything on the scale of LOTR, but he had directed plenty of movies (with the writers who later partnered with him on lotr) before he was allowed to make it, AND had spent years pitching his scripts around Hollywood and helping develop the technology used for the visual effects. Heck, Ralph Bakshi had made animated movies before, and Rankin/Bass had worked on tv specials. As much as all those adaptations are flawed like?????????? I genuinely don’t understand why you wouldn’t hire more qualified people for the most expensive tv show of all time. or even just. Anyone who had literally any qualifications at all.
But I guess I’m thinking about this all wrong because…their lack of experience is likely why they were hired. Because of the complicated legal and rights issues happening behind the scenes, Amazon likely didn’t want to hire anyone who would have a coherent vision and a clear idea of how to execute that vision. The show needed to bow to the mandates of Amazon but ALSO the copyright issues (they don’t have the rights to actually adapt most of the stuff dealing with the history they’re adapting), the mandates of the Tolkien estate (who were allowed to make whatever petty changes they wanted to the story at any time) and the mandates of New Line Cinema (who were allowing Amazon to ape the style of their movies to get l publicity for their brand but are also completely willing to enforce copyright and demand change if they felt Amazon was stepping on their toes, and etc etc). Amazon needed inexperienced people who would go along with whatever they were told to do. Someone who had a clear vision and knew how to execute it would fight against the dumb corporate mandates. Someone who has literally never worked in tv before would assume Amazon knew best and do whatever they were told.
I don’t know, I feel the same way I do about the hobbit films where it’s just—it’s such a waste? It’s such a waste. It’s such a waste of time and a waste of labor, on a project that (because of weird corporate nonsense) has no clear artistic vision and only exists to be part of a lucrative Brand(tm.)
I won’t be watching the next season— I assume the the future seasons will be “better” because the show runners have now had their very first season of experience working in television ever (good for them and congrats on breaking into the industry for the first time etc etc), but that doesn’t change what a massive corporate waste the first eight hours were— again, that’s longer than the first two PJ films but it doesn’t feel like It because it’s so directionless and devoid of a clear artistic vision. Idk as long as the only Lord of the Rings adaptations we’re legally allowed to get are massive Mega corporate ones funded off the suffering of all the underpaid Amazon workers who die in the warehouses, you would think the adaptations would at least be good XD. Again, can you imagine what more experienced and talented directors with a long history of working in TV, and who were free to execute their artistic vision, could’ve done with such a giant budget? Can you imagine if corporations didn’t waste an entire season of television as the world’s most expensive training wheels for people who’d never seriously worked in tv before? Can you imagine how much good art we could get if Hollywood was actually a meritocracy? Idk dudes, idk.
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A dumb lil headcanon I have is that Yamato was assigned Naruto’s legal guardian in shippuden. (And that before it was Hiruizen, then Kakashi, then Jiraiya) just for convenience because he’s watching over Naruto all the time anyways.
oh god. sorry my response got really long but the fact is anyone even breathes a word of yamato being fatherly to naruto and i lose my shit and start beating my fist against the earth sobbing and shaking and etc.
now TO BE FAIR. i think if anyone should be naruto's legal guardian it should probably be iruka because iruka was the one who took care of naruto when naruto needed it most, and canonically naruto thinks of iruka as a father figure so much that he like, asks him to act as his father at his wedding, and he has this whole moment as a kid
THAT SAID. i like ur ask, and when it comes to the idea of legal responsibilities, i find the idea of Yamato being granted (even temporary) guardianship over Naruto to be extremely funny and entertaining.
i think yamato would personally take a lot of pride in that and really enjoy it. i think he would love nothing more than to have a practical, obligatory tie to enable him in his desire to take care of the people he loves. i also think that he would be obnoxious about it, at least a little bit. partially because his sense of humor is a little weird, and partially because he has no idea how to act as a guardian figure.
like i think he'd say shit like "bedtime! that's an order!" and naruto would be like "oh, piss off!" and then yamato would use his scary face and naruto would get even more frustrated, and the whole time yamato would be like "wow, naruto is a great kid (if a little disobedient!) and this is such a fun game we are playing, even if it tires me out :)"
unfortunately i think, out of all the guardian/mentor figures that naruto has had, (sandaime, iruka, kakashi, jiraiya, tsunade, those elderly frogs, yamato...) i think yamato is the one he is least close with, and would least like to be a permanent fixture in his life.
i'm not saying that he doesn't like yamato, just that...i would be really surprised if there's a point after yamato gets captured, where naruto is like "man, we should really save yamato!" y'know?
i could be wrong! i haven't gotten there yet. but like. i'm not anticipating it. thats okay tho i love naruto and hes got a lot going on.
picture below is more related to the tags than the text
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The thing is, I am not paying for any subscriptions (because you know there is always an other way of watching or listening to things 🏴☠️) and if I choosed to support some independant creative content I Would think about subscribing to watcher because i really enjoy their videos !
But first well i apparently cant support them because im not from the US (still dont know if this info is true) , and second i Would not like to subscribe to something with not that much infos on what im going to be subscribed to ?
Like what kind of shows will i have access to (will there be more than now on the youtube Chanel) ? And when will the videos go out because im not sure 4 videos a month would be really worth it.
I dont know i feel like the all thing should be taken step by step and we need to wait for more infos and clarifications from Watcher.
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The best ship is Roche x Ciri
Okay, well, you had all this time you spent annoying people to make edits of Roche x Ciri, and yet you prefer to waste your time on us, people who AREN'T EVEN ACTIVELY IN THE WITCHER FANDOM instead of enjoying 'the best ship of all time'?
Okay.
Look. I know who you are, because everyone who ever dares to breathe in the proximity of a certain person gets harassed by you. I know of your whole issue with the Witcher fandom and I genuinely DO NOT CARE. Go ship your ships with huge ass age gaps, I do not??? Give??? A damn??? Literally. No fucks given. I happen to be liberal with my block button and so I do not have to actually look at stuff I do not like, yanno? Might wanna give it a try.
I am a goddamn adult with goddamn adult responsibilities who has to make goddamn money. I could not care less about you.
For the record, this will be my only response of this kind. I cannot be bothered with petty drama. All other similar messages will be deleted.
Please just go live your life and leave people who do not agree with you but stay in their own lane alone.
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