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#i can't believe it's not cannibalism!
hollowwhisperings · 9 months
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The Kids Are Alright: What's In "Blood Stew"?
In preparation for my efforts on crafting some Meera Reed meta & in support of my "Jojen Is Fine, Actually" post, I will be Preemptively Addressing the subject of "Blood Stew" in the Bran POV chapters in ADWD.
CW: spoilers for ASOIF & D&E, reference to cannibalism, hunting of animals (& probable extinction), logistics of meat production, harm to children, suicidal ideation (Jojen), arson (including to religious sites, i.e. Old Gods), possible xenocide, body horror (Brynden), cult behaviour & indoctrination, drugging & grooming of minors (Bran, by the Singers), blasphemy (consistent usage of religious terminology for an in-setting cult of faith).
Team "Cave Kids": Setting the Scene
Going into WoW, Team Bran (Bran, Summer, Walder, Meera & Jojen) will have lived as guests of the Cave Singers for near up to a year: their lodgings lay within a vast & labyrinthine underground cave system, crawling with weirwood tree roots from the Haunted Forest above, and home to More Skeletons Than A Natural History Museum. All the humans (& Summer) share sleeping quarters. Summer pops out to Hunt and Do Wolf Leader Things (GRRM has subscribed his direwolves to Ye Olde Alpha Wolfe society); Jojen Worries Meera and sometimes goes Exploring; Meera and Walder are more cautious in their movements, when Bran isn't Bodysnatching Walder for his own explorations; Bran himself is carried by Singers to & from the shared sleeping chamber to Brynden's Vertigo Cave for "Flying" Lessons.
This entire region is named by the ASOIAF Wiki as "the cave of the three-eyed crow": as I always do, I Take Issue With That Name (I got sidetracked enough to move my thoughts to a separate draft).
Instead, [Team Bran] are guests of the Singers living in "the Caves [Beneath the Haunted Forest]". The Cave Singers are Singers, not Children of the Forest, though I do use Bran & Meera's nicknames for individual Singers.
Brynden is just "Brynden": he was, once, "Lord Commander"; a "Lord Hand" twice-over; and a "Master of Whispers" both before & after his ever receiving the position "officially". More hilariously, Brynden is very definitely the Distant Cousin (mayhaps even a many-times great Uncle) of every living Stark in the series. All courtesy of one Lady Melantha Blackwood of Winterfell (and GRRM's continued Indifference to the maternal sides of family trees, To Be Doylist About It).
Bed & Breakfast
My Grievances with Non-Existent Titles, Leaf's Suspect Math & Unspecified Maternal Lineage aside, let us return to "blood stew".
"And almost every day they ate blood stew, thickened with barley and onions and chunks of meat. Jojen thought it might be squirrel meat, and Meera said that it was rat. Bran did not care. It was meat and it was good. The stewing made it tender." (Bran III, ADWD)
Jojen and Meera are probably both right, sometimes at the same time: Bran is aware of Summer's freely exit the caves to Hunt & Summer likely donates the odd "squirrel" (or pieces thereof) to the Cave Kitchens, when he can. The Supernaturally Colder climate induced by the Others does make Summer's hunting an unreliable food source, in the long run: what little game still remains in the Haunted Forest is unlikely to have any offspring to replace the current population. The ever diminishing returns of Summer's hunts are a major factor in his Direwolf Mother travelling South for her pregnancy in the first place. That she, a Giant Direwolf, somehow got as far South as Winterfell's Wolfswood? Brynden is in the neighbourhood and Invested in House Stark, if only in Bran & Jon: his "Divine Intervention" is the most plausible explanation. Directing a local direwolf to Stark lands is well within his canonically established capabilities (whether this was easier than Rigging Jon's Election is a Fun Thought Experiment).
Local vermin and Summer's potluck contributions alone could not sustain the Singers, let alone their (fragile!) human guests: it is a different sort of meat that makes up most of their Blood Stews, one Greatly Speculated upon and one of Shocking Audacity... so what is the primary ingredient of Blood Stew?
Cave Goat. :D
The Kids Are Alright
The Singers canonically keep Goats for milk, used for cheesemaking. The Singers themselves are Omnivorous (they eat mushrooms & fish) so they probably eat their goats too. Given that the Cave Settlement has existed for 1 million years (Leaf's Math, GRRM's lacking a sense of Scale), the Singers have had a long time to familiarize themselves with lactose tolerance & the butchering of goats for meat. These goats have likely lived alongside the Singers for a very long time: they're never mentioned leaving the Caves to (not) graze, meaning they too live entirely in darkness. Brynden might be called upon, now & then, to skinchange into wild Flock Queens from Above (googling "do goats have leaders" has informed me that goats are Matriarchal) & thus bring "Fresh Blood" to existing herds.
Speaking of Blood, the "blood" in Blood Stew is probably goat blood preserved after slaughter in That Most Ancient Form Of Sausage... black pudding. Blood spoils too quickly otherwise, even if the Singers have "freezers" in the form of cold caves. While GRRM never says as much, the Singers certainly have the means to "farm" salt to aid in meat preservation. There is at least one underground river in the Caves (the black one with blind fish) that is never specified as "salty" or "fresh". Assuming the Singers weren't just "mining" rock salt (solar evaporation would be Rather Difficult, what with the Complete Absence of Sunlight), the Caves almost certainly boast several brine springs.
The access to salt and [cold caves] enable the Singers to "stretch" each goat slaughtered, making them the most reliable source of meat. Given that the Singers personally tend to their goat herds, the "hygiene" of their goat meat makes the goats a much safer offering for their even the most fragile of their human guests (Bran & Jojen). Goats are safer for the Singers too: Leaf gives a population count of "three-score" for her people, and there any implications that they are an "aging population". Singers are small in size, limited in number and their mobility is likely decreasing. The "strength" of any individual Singer is never really expanded upon, beyond their ability to carry Bran around (which... doesn't really say much, given that he's a malnourished nine-year old) and historic difficulties facing humans head-on (bronze weapons & fire, yes, but larger sizes too). Slaughtering domesticated goats would be within the physical capabilities of the Singers we see moving around, hunting bigger (or more aggreesive) game would be Difficult unless Skinchanging was involved (keeping an animal docile enough to restrain and drug with shrooms, the skinchanger leaving before the actual slaughter).
So, shockingly, the "blood" in Blood Stew is just goat sausages (blood, intestines, grain & salt). The "hunks of meat" are Also Goat, for the most part, with Summer's hunts and local vermin (rats, bats, probably not ravens, any safe-for-humans bugs).
Supplementary Protein
Fish are another source of "meat": the Caves have at least one river, home to blind white fish eaten by both Singers & their human guests (differentiating "fish" from game meat would be difficult, given the primary goatiness & the "Stone Soup" vibe of any communal stew).
As Meera speculated, any vermin capable of surviving the supernatural cold, are likely additional ingredients for "Blood Stew". Vermin would be an issue in the Caves, drawn to the Singers having grain stores (oats and barleycorn): these are cold climate crops, making them farmable even This Far North (barley doesn't freeze to death 'til -8° C) though how the Singers could grow these crops in their Caves can only be Handwaved By Magic (For Safety Reasons, skylights or aboveground gardens are Unlikely). That or the Singers used ravens to facilitate Trade with freefolk, when they still lived in the area (the lands of the Thenns are North-West of the Haunted Forest). Magic ravens migjt even be foraging wild grain on the behalf of the Singers: they are fey folk, even without their keeping (stealing) the odd human to act as their personal Eldritch God-Tree Wizard.
The ravens themselves can probably be ruled out as ingredients in Blood Stew: these ravens are Sapient and Divine Envoys besides. There's also the IRL precedent of corvids Holding Grudges: incurring the Wrath of the local avian hivemind would be Enormously Stupid of the Singers. The Murders vastly outnumber the Singers, making peaceful relations Rather Important. Ravens that die prematurely or of injuries (not of sickness: fragile humans are fragile, after all) might be "Fair Game" but, knowing GRRM, the Cave Ravens are probably cannibalistic carrions.
The Cave Ravens would be much more relaxed by Singers harvesting their eggs, outside Mating Season at least. All birds eat their own eggs, making them less "taboo" than one might think. Eggs function as "external food storage" for birds, adults eating unfertilized eggs they lay & babies eating their way out from the egg they hatch from. I could not speculate on how Singers prefer their eggs: in Blood Stew, I could only guess that raven egg yolk would help in "tendering" the goat blood sausages after cold storage.
For all the food sources available to the Singers, the Blood Stews being served "almost everyday" does indicate that Rationing is at play: a Long Night looms and exhausting any food source means losing that food source permanently. Goats, fish, Summer's donations, raven eggs (&/or ravens), vermin and bugs make up the actual "meat" in Blood Stew. The general confusion of the humans as to what their meat is may be further muddled by some "hunks" actually being mushrooms or cheese.
But Humanitarianism!
While zombies are an Awkwardly Plausible Convenience (Coldhands has killed Night's Watch deserters in the vicinity of the Caves & wights were Hidden in the snow surrounding one of its entrances)... consider the state of these wights. The vast majority are rotting, even in the supernaturally cold temperatures and, since Freefolk traditionally burn their dead, the wights that are reanimated likely died in Unsavoury Manners. Even "fresh" or "preserved" corpses are quickly riddled with Unappetizing bacteria and insects. The frozen wights are old, the murdered or forgotten, and all of them Decidedly Unhygienic. Human wights might be safe enough for carrion birds or even the Singers themselves... but they are not safe for their human guests.
Consider the Efforts, the Sacrifices, that enabled Bran's getting to the Singers at all: even with Brynden's "Divine Intervention" (getting the Starklings bodyguards in the form of direwolves, prompting their awakenings as Wargs; encouraging Jojen & thus Meera to meet Bran at Winterfell; bidding Coldhands to save Sam & Gilly, enabling easier passage North via Creepy Eldritch Door, on time to give the kids a "Lift" on his Great Elk), the likelihood of Bran dying was always higher than his surviving. Readers know Bran has Plot Armour but, in-universe, his continued survival has been costly. Getting Bran safely to the Singers was an expensive undertaking, one requiring a great many moving pieces (some of them arguably "moved" before Bran was even born: each Starkling held Potential, some moreso than others, and none of their parents were originally intended for each other).
It is almost certain that Bran was not the first child Brynden Lured North: popular fanon names Euron Greyjoy as an "abandoned" attempt, whilst Jojen was canonically [granted audience? scouted?] only to be "ruled out" (being "only" a greendreamer, Jojen was instead used to Better Bran's Odds of Survival).
While greendreamers and skinchangers are Statistical Anomalies, with persons who are Both being even rarer, Westeros is large enough that having a handful of potential greenseers within generations of each other is a Fair Estimate. No, the issue is the Rarity of Potential Greenseers AND the deadly nature of any "pilgrimage". That only Brynden and Bran are ever named seems to indicate that their managing both trials makes them "worthy" of Reverance, even before "earning" the title of "greenseer". That Bran survived was miraculous and, indeed, Brynden certainly worked "Overtime" in his Acts of Divine Intervention. Even then, Bran (& Jojen's) survival was very much dependent on Summer and Meera's presence in the group: the Singers owe every single member of Team Bran a debt, all of them serving vital roles in getting them a Shiny New God-Tree for their collectiom.
What does Divine Intervention and Debts of Hospitality have to do with Blood Stew, with an "Exciting" Opportunity for Hypothetical "Humanitarianism"?
Simple: Bran is too important to the Singers for them to Risk his health by their serving "Bad Meat". Imagine going to such great lengths to find a Fresh Godling, the relief that This Godling survived to meet his destiny... only for their Godling to get killed by food poisoning.
"And They Were Roommates"
The only meal noted as being Separately Prepared for any of the humans is Bran's Weirwood Paste: what one of them eats, all of them eat. That means that one of the humans getting sick (Jojen being the most susceptible), risks all of them catching ill. While each of the humans does "disappear" now and then, exploring or generally doing their own thing, the extreme cold of their environment (their extended time traumabonding with each other) means that they all share the same sleeping chamber. They share furs, body heat, breath.
While the Singers could very easily isolate the humans from each other (if only for quarrantine purposes), keeping them together is "safer": the humans would recognise sickness or distress in each othed before the Singers could and the humans already know how to take care of each other. The Singers being Good Hosts is in their best interests, not only in currying favour with their new god-in-training but also to ensure said godling survives to do any "Ascending".
Children Are Fragile: Why "Bad Meat" Isn't An Option
Grand Futures of Kingship & God-Treehood aside, at this point in time, Bran Stark is nine-years old. Human children, even Super Magical Starklings, are still children. And children are fragile.
Bran is still recovering from Attempted Murder, with his injuries limiting his independent mobility in ways his society cannot truly accomodate (not as a Prince of Winterfell & definitely not as a half-frozen cave kid). An inability to walk isn't the greatest danger of Bran's disabilities: thermoregulation of half his body is. Bran's friends are better able to recognise Bran's symptoms of physical distress than Bran is, than the Singers could. The humans also have greater strength and mobility: the Singers only seem to have three fingers on each hand and, while Bran is unlikely to grow much bigger given his environment, he will be getting some growth spurts soon. It's unknown how long Bran is expected to need "training" from Brynden, how long he will be carried to & from the communal sleepchamber and his weirwood throne. The Singers might just Graft Bran to his Throne once he's too big for them to safely carry but, again, there is no timeline given for Bran's progress. Better to keep "Hodor" about, thinketh the much tinier Singers.
Jaime's Murder Attempt also put Bran into a prolonged coma, one he was Fortunate to awaken from. That Bran has not exhibited any of the more "inconvient" (or dangerous) consequences of a longterm coma is almost certainly Brynden's "Divine Intervention" at work. Surprising lack of cognitive issues (temporary or longlasting) aside, Bran's coma & his subsequent state of "perpetual bedrest" has left his body much weaker the average child. He's already malnourished, traumatised and struggling to stay warm: Bran getting sick, even a "minor" sickness like a cold or bout of mild food poisoning? That could kill him.
Even if Bran doesn't die from an illness, recovery would be Difficult in such as a Hostile Environment: it is cold, it is dark (no sunlight whatsoever), and [Food Insecurity] is an ongoing reality. If a person is already physically weakened, minor illnesses can very easily escalate into more serious ones. There are no Maesters, no Medicine Women for Bran. The Singers have magic bit they are fey while Bran is (at present) terrifyingly mortal. Keeping Bran alive means keeping him healthy and doing that requires keeping the Other Humans 'healthy" too: serving the "spares" Questionably Sourced Meat is against the Best Interests of the Singers, their Investment in Keeping Bran Alive.
(For now, at least.)
The Jojen Problem
The terrifying fragility of their Future God-King aside, a more "immediate" danger to the continued existence of the Cave Singers is Jojen Reed: that is, Jojen's consistent lack of good health.
Bran was a healthy child who became very vulnerable very suddenly: Jojen, meanwhile, has been "sickly" for Years. Not only is Jojen "small" for his age (14-ish), he is often described as "shaking". IRL, people get tremours for any number of reasons, and comorbid conditions are not unusual. There is valid reason to view Jojen's "shakes" as symptoms of an ongoing, chronic health condition. Jojen might have a chronic illness, lasting side effects from the fever that nearly killed him, and he's had ample opportunity to acquire some [head trauma] over the series. Jojen's "shaking fits" may also be his physiology "teaming up" with psychological trauma: muscular twitches from the stress of hypervigilance, shakiness borne of anxiety & stress, atypically expressed panic attacks (that can resemble seizures in their physicality).
While Jojen's Ambiguous Disorders are decidedly non-contagious (going by IRL counterparts), Jojen's predisposition to "sickliness" makes him just as vulnerable to Death By Minor Illness as Bran, if not moreso given Jojen's Current Psychological State.
The Terrifying Fragility of Jojen Reed
Jojen, for Very Justified Reasons, is Very Depressed. Depression, in fiction & IRL, makes people more susceptible to catching illnesses and makes recovery more difficult. That is true even when a person is not deliberately enabling (or passively "allowing") an illness to harm them.
Jojen "this is not the day I die" Reed is exhibiting every sign of suicidal ideation that Bran, his friend & fellow fragile tiny human, can pick up on. Meera, the Designated Adult of Team Bran at the wise old age of 17 & Jojen's big sister, has become genuinely concerned that Jojen's (passive) Death Wish has become an Active one.
Jojen has long believed that he is Functionally Immortal outside of Greywater Watch: his very first Greendream was, after all, a vision of his own Death. It's not unreasonable to suspect that said Death Dream is a recurring one, that Present Circumstances (Brynden's Body Horror, the complete lack of sunlight) have Exacerbated the frequency of Jojen's Dreaming of Death. Fans of The Song greatly enjoy speculating on Jojen's Inevitable Demise, many assuming he is Already Dead. This is based on his last "appearance" being Bran noting Jojen's Absence: fans fail to extend this state of Already Dead to the Also Absent Meera.
(My tinfoil has One of The Reeds Finding Something while Exploring, grabbing their sibling so as to Convene Privately Elsewhere, & that together they have begun to Conspire An Escape)
If Jojen were to Die Prematurely, far from his Destined Death at Greywater Watch... there goes Meera Reed's Entire Motivation for Being Here, in this Far Away Frozen Helscape.
Meera, obligatory loyalty to House Stark aside, has stated that her primary incentive to follow Bran, to Go North and remain there while Bran [gets made into a tree-wizard]... was to save Jojen from his Death Wish.
Reasons to Fear Meera Reed
Meera is the "healthiest" of all the humans in Team Bran: she's able-bodied, physically mature (short, yes, but strong), lethal with a net & spear... and the primary caregiver of everyone in their group.
Summer (2 y/o) helps, with scouting and hunting and bodyguarding. Walder (17 or older) helps, kind and physically powerful. Jojen (14 y/o) helped, with Uncanny Wisdom and foresight and faith in Bran. Bran (9 y/o) is, of course, the Designated Hero of his chapters (this is Greatly Limited by his being only nine-years old).
Meera (17-ish) did all that and more. Meera hunted, guarded, scouted, foraged, killed, climbed... and did so as a non-magical human, relying on her experience as a crannogmen and her Father's Daughter.
Meera keeps up morale and tells [Very Helpful] Stories, leads where Walder and the children cannot, posseses Common Sense & life experience, mediates when the children are fighting (scolds them for taking their frustrations out on each other), senses Social Danger that Summer might miss, skins prey & butchers it (ensuring none of it goes to waste). Meera is a survivalist, one canny of the Old Ways, a "Modern" example of why the First Men so successfully survived in Westeros.
And the Singers of the Cave are Old. They Know the capabilities of Humans, the single greatest threat the Singers have ever known. The Singers Remember: the Pact, the 4000 years of war before it; the First Men, their axes; the Andals, their iron & blasphemy. The Singers know Human as Invaders and Desecrators and (sometimes) Allies. The Singers also "know" the Consequences of a Human who FeelsToo Much.
Humans, historically, have Little Issue with Seeings Things Burn. Humans, it seems, will respond to Any Strong Emotion with Bronze or Iron or Fire.
Cold? A Human will find a Tree and set it on fire.
Hungry? A human will Kill Something and heat it... over fire.
Dead? Other humans gather, collect the deceased, set the body on fire.
Grieving? A human will find iron, demand answers, find you. And should your "Answers" prove unsatisfactory? Humans will set fire to YOU, your settlement, your Gods.
Meera is very, very "human". She is the most human of her group: Bran is, of course, a God-Tree sapling; Jojen is Greensighted, not long for his human flesh and soon to join You in the Trees; the one called "Hodor" reminds You of the Giants, long ago foes and more recent allies but all but a few Gone to the Earth.
(Summer is a Direwolf.)
Meera is the Single Greatest Threat to the Cave Singers, who believe themselves the "last" of their people. Meera is a Consiserable Threat to the Last Greenseer, whom she has grown to Suspect and Resent. Meera does not, at least, carry on her person any axe (she wields spear and net and shield).
Meera can definitely start a fire. Meera would willingly start a Fire, a pyre for her brother built from the Last Greenseer himself. Meera would gladly burn out the Last of the Singers, for Vengeance and as Sacrifices to stay the suit of wights (of Others) as she Flees South and homeward (taking your Prince, your Shiny New God-Tree, the Last Hope of your People with her for spite alone).
That's All, Folks!
So, no: "Blood Stew" is not made from people. It is not made of Jojen or Meera, it is Goat and Vermin and Bugs. It is occasionally made with Squirrels. The "blood" is black pudding, goat's blood and intestines salted to ensure no goat goes to waste: their hides and furs warm the children, their blood and flesh sustains them, their cheese enables their exercising in philosophy. Wights are just too dangerous, to hunt or serve for supper: Bran (& Jojen) cannot be risked for the sake of morbid convenience. Live humans are right out, too much bigger and stronger than the Singers, or too dearly missed by The Scariest Being North of The Wall.
The Kids are Alright (the human ones, anyway).
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drawbauchery · 2 months
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gryphmakes · 13 days
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blood drunk
Inspired by that voiceline about vishaps drinking the blood of their dead kin. It's a little sketchier than usual, but I got talked into posting it anyways. This was actually a warmup for a different piece, by which I mean monsieur the iudex wouldn't let me draw anything else until I drew him like this.
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talesofwhimsy · 18 days
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I'm 100 pages into Moby Dick and they just got on the goddamn boat
This book actually kinda fucks hard it's great?
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daincrediblegg · 9 months
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"yellowjackets is like if the terror was with teenage girls" WRONG. those girls were just living their truth. all cannibals are teenage girls. ergo: every man in the terror is really a teenage girl. Thank you for coming to my ted talk
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cynthiaviolet · 11 months
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my favorite running gag in yellowjackets is when someone names randy and everyone else is like: randy, really?, like nobody has a good opinion about that loser of a guy.
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andthebeanstalk · 4 months
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The cool thing about a horror movie that takes place in a mental hospital and, shockingly, actually turns out to be on the side of mentally ill people is that it avoids all the common disgusting pitfalls of mocking, demonizing, and infantilizing mentally ill people.
The downside is
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
[It's much scarier.]
#original#smile movie#smile 2022#I'm literally two scenes in#it could definitely become ableist by the end of the movie but I'm kind of obsessed so far?#like nothing is scarier to me than the lack of quality help and validation available to victims of trauma! and this movie is LEANING INTO IT#which is way scarier and also way truer and more important to talk about than a looney bin filled with lunatics who want to murder you#like that's literally a concept based solely on people's ableist fears.#same with horror movie monsters that are just people with facial deformities or congenital disorders or just... people who are poor#(the hillbilly cannibal trope is just MAN POOR PEOPLE ARE SCARY HUH. it's garbage.)#what's ACTUALLY a horror is the way these people are treated! and that INCLUDES how they are portrayed in media!#because guess what? ghosts aren't real and an abandoned mental hospital can't hurt you#but you know what can? a doctor who doesn't believe you. a system built on neglect. THAT'S the horror we need to talk about.#and THAT is why I am going to have to watch this movie in short installments over a few days#and let me be clear: i am alive today bc of a mental hospital's IOP/PHP program. i stopped being suicidal after YEARS bc of that program#mental hospitals CAN and SHOULD be GOOD THINGS ACTUALLY. but in countries with shitty healthcare that's very hard to find.#it is also why it is my life's work to build a treatment center that PROVES we can do this ethically and with compassion#life is worth living#and the American Healthcare industry can die just the same as any other giant or dragon. empires have fallen before. it is not immortal.#YOU reading this matter. stay safe. please. it isn't the end yet. i love you.
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mythvoiced · 2 months
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-. wenzhe-core (pt. 1 oh god)
in response to the question 'you'd love your kids unconditionally no?': i don't even know those people yet. they just came out. they could be dicks for all i know
in response to a cis-straight white friend saying some awkward ignorant shit: your qi's all fucked bro, maybe we should kiss about it
in response to the WARRANTED question if he's bi, while visibly nervous: of course i'm a biped, is this about plato
in a conversation that had NOTHING to do with drag queens: on that note, i've been thinking, if a drag queen mugged me, i'd probably let her get away with it
wu zetian did nothing wrong by the way
i'm so glad it's your ben ming nian next year, like, fuck
uber? more like uberMENSCH, haha, nietzsche, amiright? ha....... no, i... uh. never went to oovoo javier, no
epic rap battles of history is NOT a good source just copy from wikipedia like everybody else does, like-
right after the previous one, in response to the question of how he recognized it was erb so fast, visibly sweating: what? i don't know what that is, sit down
in a lull in a group conversation after several moments of silence: y'know, i was thinking, if i wanted to kill my grandma, like, if i had to for some reason, i'd probably just have to cuss at her once, actually, but then my mother would kill me, so it's not worth it
aah~... i get it: the autistic swagger
people get way too worked up about c*nnibalism me thinks
a few moments before forgetting to salt a dish: recipes who go 'add salt' are stupid, of course i'll add salt, what would i not put salt into, BUT, then again, if a recipe doesn't say it, i will get confused, actually, so it's this whole thing, you know?
i wish getting upset would make me spit out blood the way it happens in wuxia's, it would add so much flair to my seasonal depression
apartment "complex"... really? i find it quite simple
"based"? based on what?
you're telling me a shrimp fried this rice?
road work ahead? uh, yeah, i sure hope it does
you're gonna look at me and you're gonna tell me that i'm wrong?!
odysseus is the biggest fucking-- plays 3d chess concocting up that whole 'nobody' ploy and then at first opportunity he just-- 'oh, and by the way? fuck you, signed, odysseus of ithaca' who does that
yeah, no, it was awful. yeah, yeah it killed 502 people, yeah... yeah, no it was... yeah it was awful... wanna hear more about it?
drinking a slushie: i just realized i don't like slushies- no, stop, i'm not throwing it away, are you insane? it cost Money
fuck pineapples, they eat you back
you know, the only reason we're apex predators is because we figured out how to make things that make killing others easier, that's all, really, our success in history, in the world, our supremacy over other species, it all comes down to us killing our way to the top, which is probably why we're killing each other now, we have no other beings to bury beneath us... are you gonna finish that, by the way?
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coockie8 · 7 months
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Hey, if you're going to make a post archiving evidence of real-world harm someone is committing; like being a TERF, or racist, or a homophobe, or anything else like that, do not mention any fandom bullshit.
I doesn't matter what fictional shit this person enjoys and it has no place being mentioned in a post warning people that someone is genuinely dangerous. When you bring up shipping and other fandom crap it majorly trivializes your point.
I don't care what this person does to literal objects; the only thing that matters is how they treat real, living people! When you're warning people that someone is dangerous, leave fucking fairy tales out of it. They. Do. Not. Matter!
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jyou-no-sonoko19 · 11 months
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[ Bloody Queen Lilith : man blood & angel ichor ]
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stolligaseptember · 2 years
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hannibal's face after will asks him if he brought him chicken soup vs will's face after hannibal calls the trout a "very nietzscheian fish". fight.
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bereft-of-frogs · 27 days
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i was thinking 'hm I've definitely picked up some followers who weren't around for the original pandemic-induced 'organic cannibalism' phase when I binged the terror and hannibal and the casting lots podcast uh oh they're going to be concerned' but then I remembered that I actually brought up cannibalism to the CEO of the company I work at during an event so. Not so worried about you guys, I feel like you all can roll with the organic cannibalism posting right?
anyway, good vacation binge watching the soccer survival cannibalism show 10/10
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Note: These are homages to both the subject matter and R.L. Stine's amazing body of work. Share and enjoy responsibly, and stay weird!
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eldrichthingy · 8 months
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WTF DARK URGE IS CANNONICALLY CANNIBALISTIC??????? HOW DID I NOT KNOW THAT?????????
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nevalizona · 3 months
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This is SO funny to me?!?!?!?
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And no -.- I haven't added to my meat board in a while LOL
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lesbianlotties · 1 year
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We're gonna stay in love somehow - Ronance - Yellowjackets AU
Stranger Things Femslash Week ( @strangerthingsfemslashweek​ ) - Day 1: Woman’s Wrongs
Summary:
It felt wrong to say there were some good things about being stranded in the middle of nowhere with her high school soccer team but…
Nancy Wheeler.
How could Robin complain when she still had Nancy’s company, when they had finally made it this far? Who would’ve thought that it would only take a huge catastrophe and several people dying for them to admit their feelings for each other?
Yellowjackets AU aka The Shaunajackiefication of Ronance!
(warnings for angst, unhappy ending, homoerotic cannibalism, and also did i mention i’m sorry about this?)
For Robin, that damn creepy attic of their cabin in the wood had never felt so fucking cold. That had to be the coldest day in the wilderness since their cursed plane crashed and burned and left them stranded in those eerie woods.
“Robin, you’re shivering,” Nancy said from her spot sitting against the wall. “Step away from the window, you won’t find something for us to hunt like that. Just… come here, please.”
Robin sighed and tried to hide her smile. It felt wrong to say there were some good things about being stranded in the middle of nowhere with her high school soccer team but… Nancy Wheeler. How could she complain when she still had Nancy’s company, when they had made it this far? Who would’ve thought that it would only take a huge catastrophe and several people dying for them to admit their feelings for each other?
Still, Robin made it a point to grumble “I hate this” as she took a seat beside Nancy, cuddled close to her.
“Ouch,” Nancy said with only the smallest hint of amusement in her tone, “Am I that bad company?”
“You know what I mean,” Robin rolled her eyes, but smiled for Nancy. If Nancy was the one attempting to lift the mood with humor, it was a bad sign for Robin’s mental state. “I hate the people we’re becoming here,” she explained in a whisper. “I hate the things we have to do just to survive…”
“We’re only doing what we have to do,” Nancy replied. That serious tone, that determination in her voice, that was much more familiar. That was the captain of their team, that was the girl Robin fell in love with. “I would do anything to keep you alive, Robin.”
Those words took Robin’s breath away. She felt each of those words take root in her heart and mind. She swore she would never forget this moment with Nancy. 
After she said the words, Nancy shifted their positions enough so she could hold out one hand for Robin, who eagerly took her hand and intertwined their fingers. Nancy’s hand was cold and familiar. Robin brought their intertwined hands up to her lips, and kissed Nancy’s knuckles. When she looked up at Nancy again, she saw her expression had softened. It was that particular enamored look that Nancy reserved exclusively for Robin. She didn’t have to say the words anymore. Robin instinctively knew what that look meant.
Robin leaned in slowly, closed the distance between them, and softly kissed Nancy’s lips. They both shivered. Their lips were too cold, but the familiar pressure was a comfort like no other. Robin sighed against Nancy’s lips, her breath was warm, and she felt Nancy relax under her kiss. Eventually, though, they had to part. At first, Robin stayed closed, her forehead pressed softly against Nancy’s. But then something changed.
Nancy spoke up again, and this time her voice was different. This time she sounded like the closed-off, proud, too-popular, too-smart, girl that she used to be when Robin first got into the team, Nancy’s team.
“One question though,” Nancy said with ice-cold amusement dripping off her voice, “What did you do with my ear, Buckley?”
Robin gasped. She felt her breath catch in her throat. Her heart skipped a beat. Her hand started to shake.
“No,” Robin mumbled, pulling back from Nancy and immediately looking away. “Nothing,” she said, taking her hand hastily away from Nancy’s and moving to stand up. “I buried it,” she insisted, stumbling to her feet and walking away.
“Liar,” Nancy snapped. She appeared right in front of Robin. Time and space for nothing for Nancy anymore. She was wearing the clothes she had on the night of their last argument. For one moment, she looked furious, that deep frown she wore during their toughest games that Robin used to find equal measures of attractive and frightening. “Such a pretty liar,” Nancy said, somehow capable of razor-sharp sweetness.
“Stop,” Robin said, turning to the side, but two steps later, in the blink of an eye, Nancy was there again.
“I really fell in love with you, you know?” Nancy said, thoughtfully, without a hint of the warmth nor the mischief she wore seconds ago, just… honest.
“I loved you too, Nancy,” Robin whispered, her voice breaking. “I do. I love you. I still love you. I’ll always love you.”
“But you killed me, Robin,” Nancy said, and Robin closed her eyes in response. “Turn around and see what you did to me. You let me and my stupid pride spend the night outside and freeze to death. You killed me, you took my ear, you broke my lip, and you know… You know what you’re going to do with my body when you guys run out of food and the only other option is starvation.”
“I didn’t kill you, it wasn’t my fault,” Robin said through clenched teeth as hot tears fell down her face. When she heard Nancy laugh again, something youthful, familiar, and so full of life again, she snapped. “Stop!” Robin yelled.
She opened her eyes and Nancy’s ghost wasn’t there anymore, but she refused to turn around and see the body. Instead, she focused on getting out of the attic before anyone came over to ask who she was yelling at.
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