#i got carried away this was just a doodle at first :X

[cordeliawhohung]

OMG i just saw your !MafiaGhost on how they met but can you do how !MafiaJohnPrice met with the reader? (if you haven't already and have the time of course. 😊💕.)

mafia!John Price x fem!Reader

John Price has always walked a different path in life than people like you. And yet, despite your status, he learns that the two of you are more alike than he thought. Or maybe it's just wishful thinking.

mafia!141 masterlist

warnings: vague mentions of death and violence, infidelity, crude language, hurt/comfort, unhealthy relationship dynamics

wc: 4.3k

an: sorry this took me a bit to answer! as you can see i got carried away. also, as we're headed into the new year, i'd just like to take a moment to say thank you to everyone who's been supporting my works! i recently hit 1k followers, and i cannot thank you guys enough for your lovely comments <3 i hope you all enjoy :)

“You see that girl right there? You stay away from her. She’s nothing but trouble.” 

Those were the first words John’s father ever said about you. He used one long, crooked finger to point you out in the crowd of other students who mingled about the room with their parents. Everyone had gathered in the school gymnasium for the science fair where all Year 8 students had projects and posters set up on rickety fold tables. Voices echoed endlessly off of the hard floor and walls that it was almost overwhelming.

Really, he didn’t agree with his father about you being trouble. You were plenty kind, and well liked by students and teachers alike due to your kindness and intellect. A proper student, one that everyone else in the school strived to be. There were times where your words bit harder than most would have liked, but John just saw that as you telling things the way they were. He liked that about you. Admired you, even. But then he saw the real reason why his father said those words. 

The man who accompanied you oozed authority and power, both in his stance and the way he walked. People regarded him like he was the King of England himself both in how they spoke to him and stepped around him like he could part a crowd with just a single glance. Most importantly, this man was your father, and he donned a uniform fit for only the chief of police himself. His father never liked police officers very much. They always made things difficult when it came to running the family business. 

It wasn’t until Year 11 that he actually talked to you. Or, more like you talked to him. By some terrible twist of fate, his maths teacher sat the two of you together in the small, double seated desks that laid in perfect lines around the entirety of the room. He learned that you liked to doodle in the corner of your paper during lectures, and had a tendency to tap your pencil against the desk while taking exams. He liked the way your eyebrows knitted together in concentration, and how soft your voice was when whispering answers to the table next to you. 

He didn’t have time to think about you often, not that he should have. John Price was unfortunate enough to come from a family that had a long line of brutal patriarchs that often conditioned equally as cruel heirs. Once he turned sixteen he was forced to go along with his father during his work escapades where he very quickly learned how to clean up bodies without dirtying himself. He often showed up at school with various cuts and bruises, and with heavy bags under his eyes. Balancing the life of a killer and a student was tiring work. 

“Red color corrector will hide the bruise on your eye.” 

It took John a moment to realize you were talking to him, and even then he still didn’t fully believe it until he looked over and saw you staring at him. You were leaned forward over your desk with your hand lazily propping up your head while you waited for him to answer. His pencil halted in its dance across his work as he brought his full attention your way. 

“Color corrector?” he repeated. 

“Yeah, you know. Green hides red marks from acne, orange hides dark circles, red for… very dark circles,” you said, tilting your head at him. “I’ve got some in my bag, if you’d like. Though, you’d have to find your own shade of foundation.” 

Your bluntness and slight humor towards the shiner on his eye had him chuckling, which only made the smile on your face grow into a smirk. 

“You sound like an expert,” he noticed. 

“I am,” you quipped before grinning. Carefully, you reached a hand up to the collar of your uniform and pulled down, exposing the side of your neck and some of your collar bone. There were several, small and faint hickies that he probably wouldn’t have noticed if it wasn’t for you pointing them out. “A girl’s gotta have her fun.” 

John liked your humor. And maybe there was something a little comforting knowing that someone like you was getting into trouble, too. Albeit, significantly less violent trouble than him, but that was for the best anyway. Maybe it gave him hope that someone like you and someone like him could actually have something in common. That he could resemble something that was normal.

A few years passed, and John began to drift from you bit by bit. You ended up graduating at the top of the class which earned you several offers from the most prestigious schools across the country, and it was all anyone talked about. Great things awaited you with opportunities to see distant lands, meet new people, and live a good and honest life. 

As for John, his father died when he was twenty-three. Murdered, to be exact, and in a manner eerily similar to the way his mother had been. Cold, calculated, and ruthless, his fathers existence had been snuffed out by a single bullet where his blood stained the pillow that covered his face. 

The torch had been passed down, and its handle was still bloody. 

Over the years he grew rigid and battle hardened in the business of violence. He earned plenty of scars, and built upon his fathers empire until it was twice as big and infinitely more dangerous. It was the only thing his father had ever managed to teach him; how to be dangerous. Everyone who once thought the Price’s were people to fuck with learned very quickly that the new Don had nothing to lose but his own life; one that he didn’t care all too much about. 

The only thing he held close to him was the ghosts of his past, which was why he found himself standing in line at the florist’s shop. Even while running a quick errand, his phone vibrated in his pocket non-stop from merciless amounts of emails flooding his inbox. Mostly updates about certain events within the family that he attempted to lazily check as the woman in front of him spoke sweetly to the shopkeeper. Her voice was so soft, so comforting, so… familiar?

He didn’t realize it was you in front of him until you turned to leave with a small bouquet of flowers in your hands. Even after all those years he could recognize the features of your face like it was second nature. The shopkeeper spoke to him and asked him what she could do to help him, but her words didn’t even register in his mind. His feet moved on their own accord, and your name slipped out of his lips before he could do anything to stop it. 

Once you turned around to face him he found that the air had been knocked completely out of his lungs. It had been years since he had seen you, and you had changed so much; grown into your features, and turned into a beautiful woman that left him speechless. However, you didn’t regard him with the same dreamy gaze; instead, you stood there and stared at him as you awkwardly adjusted the flowers in your arms. 

“Yes?” you asked tensely. 

You didn’t recognize him. Of course, it made sense. He had grown significantly taller, his facial hair was full and thick, and for once he wasn’t sporting a shiner. His clothes were also significantly nicer, as he seemed to have grown fond of business casual as of late. If anything, your confusion was more humorous than anything else because he should have seen it coming. 

“John, John Price,” he said as if he was introducing himself for the first time. 

There was something about the way your eyes lit up at his name that had him feeling warmer than he had in a long while. A precious grin broke out on your lips as you took a step closer to him and laughed in the way someone does when they’ve figured out the answer to a riddle, and it was too contagious for John to not chuckle with you. 

“I didn’t recognize you!” you exclaimed, still giggling. “God, it’s been years! Staying out of trouble, I hope?” 

“Getting in just enough to keep things interesting,” he countered. 

It was like no time had passed at all. You were still that star pupil that you were all those years ago, and he could still hear your pencil tapping on your desk clear as day. It felt unreal. 

“What’s the occasion?” he then asked, gesturing to the flowers you held. 

“Oh,” you said, as if surprised. “Well, it’s, uhm, the anniversary of my dad’s passing.” 

The chief of police? Your father? That man who always held himself so powerfully had been shoved into the cold, unforgiving earth? When he was a kid that man had always seemed indestructible. Then again, so did every other adult when you’re at that age. 

“I’m sorry to hear that, I hadn’t heard,” he quickly apologized. 

Despite the terrible awkwardness of the conversation, you still smiled. “It’s alright. Was a while ago now, anyway. But, uh, what about you?” you asked, gesturing towards him and his empty arms. 

“Mum’s birthday,” he answered simply. 

His response made you smile something small and bittersweet. “How sweet of you. I bet she’ll love them.” 

“Yes, they’ll make for good decoration.” 

Something settled between the two of you; something that had never been there before. Not while you were children; not when you grew up together. Whatever it was, it was unfamiliar, and much too suffocating, and he wasn’t sure if he wanted to welcome it or not. 

“Well, I ought to get going,” you excused politely. “Got a few more errands to run. But it was really good seeing you again, John.” 

This was the part where he should have said goodbye. Wished you farewell just for you to vanish and most likely never see him again. If he was a smart man, John would have done just that, and instead he found his hand diving into his pocket before he could stop it. He grabbed a pen and stole one of the shop's business cards off of the counter where he quickly scribbled down something in the negative space before holding it out for you to take. 

“Here. I’m certain you get this a lot, but if you need anything, anything at all, I’ll be there,” he assured you. 

To his surprise, you took the card without hesitation where your eyes quickly scanned his rushed handwriting while you thanked him. As you held the card in front of you, something caught John’s attention. There was a metallic glint on your finger, one so bright that it nearly blinded him, and he realized you wore a large, gaudy ring. It was something given to you in poor taste, surely. Something that attempted to steal the spotlight of your beauty rather than compliment it. 

“Did you get married?” he asked in what he told himself was curiosity. 

You paused for a moment as you glanced at the ring on your finger. With such a large and obnoxious gem on a thin band, he was surprised it hadn’t snapped off. 

“Oh, not yet. Just engaged,” you said in an odd tone. As if you couldn’t stand to look at the ring any longer, you shoved the card into your pocket before smiling at him. “Thank you, again.” 

He tried to forget about you after that. Tried to forget about that ring on your finger and the way your voice changed when you mentioned your engagement. But it was so easy to worry about you; to care about you. Even after all those years you were still just as sweet and well spoken, but he was still John Price. Now the Don of the most lethal mafia in the country, he shouldn’t have been around anyone like you. You were the chief of police’s daughter, the girl who graduated top of his class in school and went to university; trouble. Nothing but trouble. 

So he kept to his own work. Ran his club on the south end of the city, washed the blood out of his shirt, and spent his nights sipping brandy that was too expensive and well crafted for a man like him. But then he thought about the dress that you’d wear, how you would do your hair, what song you’d want to have your first dance to… it was moments like that when he was glad that he had given you his number rather than the other way around. He was even more glad that you hadn’t made an effort to reach out to him. It was better that way.

“You alright, boss?” 

Those three words tore John right out of his thoughts and slammed him right back down to earth. Back to the thundering bass that shook the walls around him in the nightclub, back to real life and the man who sat at the desk in front of him, typing away on the computer. 

“Tired,” John replied simply. 

“You’re always tired,” the man countered. He paused his typing at the computer and ran a hand over his hair, which he had styled into a slightly grown out mohawk. “Even then you never space out this bad.” 

Whatever Soap, his electronics specialist, was trying to get at, John certainly wasn’t in the mood for it. Sighing, he leaned back further in his seat while he stared at the man with a tense expression. “Do you have the intel or not?” 

A small chuckle came from the corner of the office where another man sat, seemingly bored as he typed away on his phone. “Way to piss the man off.”

“Aye, I’ll turn that phone of yours into a fancy brick if you don’t watch your tone, Garrick.” 

The two men chuckled at each other’s teasing just in time for John’s own phone to go off. Not expecting a call, John ripped the device out of his pocket and stared at the unrecognized caller ID with his thumb hovering over the decline button. But he hesitated. It had been months since he had given you his number, and yet a small part of him worried you might have been on the other line. 

When he stood from his chair, it caught the other two men in the room off guard, but they stayed silent as they watched John accept the call and raise the phone to his ear. 

“Hello?” he answered. 

All he got in response was a sob. 

By the time John had found you, all of your tears had run dry and a brutal fury filled the empty space. It wasn’t terribly late at night, but it was plenty dark enough that the park you had run off to looked eerie and uninviting in the dim halogen lights. Knees bouncing with anxiety, you sat on a park bench and bit into your bottom lip as you watched John approach from the street. 

For as much effort as he put into looking calm on the outside, it did absolutely nothing to settle the nerves fraying within him. Hearing you cry, hearing you beg for him to come get you scared him more than he cared to admit. Really, he was rather proud of himself for keeping as level headed as he did, even after he saw the tear stains on your cheeks. 

It didn’t take long to coax what happened out of you, in fact, it nearly erupted out of you. That fiance of yours had proved to be less honest than he liked to paint himself as, and as the two of you sat on that park bench in the middle of the night you gave him every excruciating detail. How he had been acting strange for a few months, how he used to show you off and then suddenly wanted to keep you locked away. A part of you knew what was really happening, and yet you told yourself you were crazy until you had walked in on your fiance fucking his mistress in your shared bed. 

“Four fucking years, John,” you said, trying not to grit your teeth too hard that they cracked. “Four years of being with this man just for him to do that? He moved me into his flat, wanted me to quit my job because he said he wanted to take care of me. I have nothing. I don’t have my own place, I hardly have my own money, I was an idiot and gave up everything because he asked me to and I was stupid enough to believe him.” 

By that point in your rant your knees were bouncing so fast your entire body vibrated. Terrified you’d disintegrate in front of him, John reached a careful hand out and brushed it against your shoulder. Though you didn’t say anything about it, or even look at him differently, your muscles seemed to relax some. 

“I could’ve been great,” you continued as your voice began to break. “I was able to go to any school in this country, I got my degree, I could’ve kept at work and been… something. And I didn’t need to. Not really. There was never anything I was trying to prove to anyone. I could’ve had a few kids with that white picket fence and stayed home to care for them.  I would’ve been completely happy living that trophy wife life if it meant I was loved. But I wasn’t. I’m not, and that fucking hurts because I know I’m worth so much more than this.”

More tears fell from your eyes after that, and it didn’t take much prompting from John before you crumbled against his side. When was the last time someone had held you like that? Wrapped their arms around you and held you close? When was the last time someone comforted you and actually meant it and not just in some sort of twisted expectation of devotion? Something in you told you that you should have felt shame for blatantly sobbing on a man in such a public space at an hour like that. Another part of you didn’t really care. 

It took a lot of convincing to get you to stay at his place. Eyes refusing to look at him when you gave him excuse after excuse, it was obvious that you didn’t want to burden him anymore than you already had. So you told him you could stay with your mom, or even get a hotel if that wouldn’t work, but John simply wouldn’t hear it. 

Eventually you were in the living room of his house. An actual house. Not an apartment or flat in the city, but something kind and quaint in the higher end of town. He had a real lawn and backyard that was perfectly manicured, and everything on the inside of the house was much too perfect and clean. It was something straight out of the catalogs you’d see in magazines or on HGTV.

First order of business was a shower, and though it felt strange changing into John’s clothes, you would have done anything to wipe the stench of your cheating fiance off of you. And maybe it was because of the spite that boiled inside of you, but you found that you liked the way John’s clothes smelled significantly more than you ever liked your ex’s. Second was getting you food, and though you had told John you weren’t hungry, the scent of his buffalo chicken was too good to pass up. 

It was near midnight by the time you went to bed, and John had made sure everything was set up for you in the guest room before he meandered back down to the kitchen to clean up. There was still plenty of work that needed to be finished that night back with the boys. He took comfort in knowing that you’d be safe in his house, at least, and well out of reach of that terrible excuse of a man. 

When John finished cleaning things up in the kitchen, it took him a moment to notice the incessant buzzing sound that plagued the room. Like rattling glass, it made his ears quiver just listening to it, and he quickly scavenged the countertops until he found your phone resting on the island in the center of the room. Flashing lights illuminated the screen as your ex’s caller ID and photo popped up. He caught the tail end of the call, and the screen faded back to your lock screen where it claimed to have received 27 missed calls, as well as 84 unread text messages. 

Where the fuck are you?

Answer your fucking phone.

Baby please.

Answer me.

Stop being a fucking bitch.

Goddamn skank.

Come on, honey it means nothing.

Are you seriously making this a big deal?

Come home before I drag you home.

I’m not fucking around.

You’re pissing me off. 

Before leaving the house to head back to the nightclub, John swiped up your phone and hid it in his pocket, along with that god awful ring you didn’t care to wear anymore. 

In the morning you woke up in a bed that wasn’t yours with clothes that didn’t fit you, yet you had never felt so comfortable in your entire life. It had been a long while since you last felt like you belonged; since you felt comfortable in your own skin. Still, you couldn’t stay there forever and you forced yourself up off of the mattress as you snuck your way to the living room. You were greeted by several large boxes that sat stacked neatly in the furthest corner of the room, and once again John was in the kitchen making food. He still wore the same clothes he had the night before, and they looked terribly disheveled, yet he still continued on anyway. 

“Mornin’,” he greeted as he looked up from his pan where several eggs sizzled away. “Sleep alright?” 

Still groggy, you approached the island where you lazily leaned against it. “Yeah. Looks like you didn’t get any, though.” 

John chuckled, something tired yet still hearty at the same time. “Perceptive.” 

“Always have been.” 

John quickly finished up the eggs and began to dish out the food onto plates. While you waited, your fingers lazily ran over the counter top where they collided with your phone, and it took everything in you to hold back a sigh. Looking down at it, you pressed the home button where the screen lit up, expecting to see several messages from your ex, and yet there was nothing. You stood there perplexed and wondered if the man had really let you just run away from him, until you noticed something else missing. 

“Have you seen my ring?” you questioned as John slid a plate of food your way. 

“Your ex took it back,” John answered simply. He stood on the other side of the island for a moment before he turned around and started cleaning up the mess of ingredients and dishes that littered the counter. “I also managed to retrieve all your personal items. They’re stacked in the living room when you’re ready to look through them.” 

Mouth open in surprise, you glanced back into the living room and eyed the stack of boxes before looking back at John with a raised eyebrow. “How… how’d you manage all that?” 

Perhaps he should have hesitated before answering. Thought of something to say other than the truth. Instead, John didn’t miss a beat in answering you as he continued cleaning. 

“He sent you a few messages last night and I saw his name pop up on your phone. Didn’t realize you were engaged to the mayor’s son,” he explained. “I have some contacts who were able to get me an audience with him. I figured it would be easier for me to grab your items than you doing it yourself. Save you the trouble, at least. He shouldn’t be bugging you again.” 

For the longest time, you didn’t know what to say. There were a few glaringly obvious holes in his explanation, namely why there weren’t any notifications on your phone. If he had only glanced at it, they would have still been there, and yet they had been cleared. Then there was the fact your ex was too self centered to ever have an audience with anyone he didn’t actively seek out. Perhaps even stranger, you weren’t at all surprised. Maybe you were a little taken aback at everything he had done for you, but not at the methods he used to get it done. Because you had known John’s secret from the very beginning. After all, you had been the chief’s daughter. 

“John,” you said, voice soft and even. 

Drying his hands off on a small towel, he turned around to finally face you where he was surprised to find you smiling. And god, you were stunning, so much so that all he could do was stand there and wait for you to continue. 

“I’m glad I ran into you at the flower shop,” you finished. “Thank you. For everything.” 

It wasn’t what he expected you to say, and still he mimicked your smile, although it was much more tired than yours had been. Life was strange. Nothing had ever gone as planned in John’s life, and yet there was you. Through all the years and the shit and the struggles, you had found your way back into his life, and for some strange reason, he found himself hoping you’d stick around this time, no matter how much trouble you caused. 

“Any time, darling.” 

don't let me in with no intention to keep me jesus christ, don't be kind to me honey, don't feed me, i will come back

#mafia!price #mafia!john price #mafia!141 #john price x reader #price x reader #captain price x reader #captain john price x reader

[heeverseblog]

this time

synopsis: you confessed to jake sim in your senior year of high school but got rejected. now you’re a single mom in need of a math tutor to help your daughter pass math class. you happen to stumble upon jake’s profile and end up hiring him.

pairing: math tutor!jake x single mom!reader

genre: childhood acquaintances to lovers, single parent au, fluff, little bit of angst but happy ending

warnings: unrequited love (only at the beginning), mentions of early pregnancy, abandonment, fear of being in a relationship, one suggestive scene, short argument about career

word count: 11,359 words

note: THIS WHOLE STORY IS RUSHED AND NOT HEAVILY PROOFREAD, SORRY :((((

the first day you saw jake sim was at your school’s library. you were reading “anne of green gables” while he was reading a physics textbook. a freakin’ physics textbook. who reads a physics textbook at eight years old? apparently, jake sim does.

he looked so invested in reading formulas and his glasses were thick black-framed ones. you thought it was cute when he was sticking his tongue out as he was reading probably some formulas and terms. you forgot about gilbert blythe because that day, jake sim became number one in your “the cutest boys i’ve ever seen” list.

word was sent out that you had a huge, massive crush on jake sim. who wouldn’t know when you shout his name every time he passes by your way? you’d give him love notes saying how cute he looked with his glasses and how he has the cutest smile. every cringey, embarrassing thing a girl can do and call her crush just for him to notice her. yes, you’ve done it all.

when you became a teenager, you think that what you feel towards jake is more than just a crush. the longer you got to know him, the more you got to see how kind he was. when everyone was having a hard time understanding math, he’d write on the blackboard formulas and explaining when and where to use them. when a kid fell on his bike, he cleaned the wound and carried him to the school clinic, even when he was tired and sweaty from soccer practice.

one time, you were bored at math class. so you doodled the soccer field from your window. then your math teacher slams his hands on your table and proceeds to humiliate you on your artistic dreams. your colored pencils were confiscated and as shallow as it may be, you felt like a part of you was taken away after being humiliated.

while it was lunch time, jake came out of your classroom going with his friends, sunghoon and jay. you were still sad about what happened a while ago. when you sat down, you were surprised when you colored pencils were placed under your desk. you remember jake coming out of the classroom. you smile, realizing that you liked jake sim.

every girl fell on line in talking to jake sim. but you always made sure you were first. rumors spread that jake had a crush on the transfer student, kazuha. the rumors were confirmed when he asked her to the school dance. they danced that night but nothing bloomed. you noticed jake looked a little sulky the following week. and you thought that simply making him laugh like making funny faces or giving him cookies will make him feel better. and he did. jake was never mean to you. he still treats you kindly like everyone else. and you were fine with that. but you wanted to step your game.

a few weeks left and you will be graduating high school. so you wanted to confess to jake properly. you drew a banner with your confession, “jake sim, will you accept me?” you remember setting up the art room with lights. your art teacher was kind enough to allow you, knowing that you were her favorite student.

“jake sim, i’ve liked you since the day you were reading that textbook in the library. i’ve always liked you and it took me years to properly confess how I truly feel . so… you held out the flowers to him, “will you accept me?”

you felt like crying saying your confession. but you didn’t care. you gave him the peonies from your mother’s flower shop. when you thought will reach for the flowers, he held hands and slowly pulled them down. your face went down along with your hands.

“y/n, i appreciate what you have done…but,” jake looked down at the floor, “i don’t like you like that.”

you’d be lying to yourself when you say you’re not hurt. you tried your best not to blink or else the tears will come out of your eyes.

“oh. um…thank you for being honest.” you gave him a forced smile, feeling your eyes well up. on cue, the school bell rings, signaling it’s time for all students to get out of the building.

“i’ll see you tomorrow?”

jake nods, “see you tomorrow.”

you gave him a pat in the back before turning of the lights then ran out of the art room. you let the tears run down your face as the petals from the peonies fell, leaving a trail on the floor.

after a week, you received your high school diploma and off you to college you go. you and your friends took pictures together and you thought that it would be nice to walk around your school for one last time. from the classrooms, to the playgrounds, to the soccer fields. then you took one last glance at the art room, recalling the day you experienced your first heartbreak.

when you went back to your parents, they gave you a tight hug before giving you a bouquet. then you catch a glimpse of jake with his family. like yours, his parents were proud of him for finishing top of his class. your heart might have swelled a little but before you could feel it more, your dad said he’d take you and your mom out to dinner.

jake sim might not like you back but you were sure that he will be a good memory you can look back to.

“i’m sorry, mom.” your seven-year-old daughter tells you as both of you walked out of her classroom. apparently, she wasn’t the best at math class and her homeroom teacher was beginning to worry. but who were you to be disappointed when you were never the best at math either.

you kneel down, holding your daughter’s shoulders, “aera, we’re going to hire someone to help you, alright?”

aera pouts while nodding her head. you held her cheek, “sweetie, it’ll be alright. hm?” your daughter slowly nods her head then both of you went home.

you’re in an app searching for math tutors that look friendly but will help your daughter excel in class. it’s been an hour and you still haven’t found the right one.

“mommy, what’s for dinner?” aera says as she colors in her coloring book.

“we’re having spaghetti tonight, sweetie.” aera just nods her head and goes back to coloring. when you returned your attention to your phone, a familiar name popped up.

sim jaeyun: part-time physics teacher, part-time math tutor

sim jaeyun or known as jake sim when you were just a girl living in a small town. he was the boy you’ve had a huge crush on ever since you were eight years old. because of your silly crush on him, you confessed to him a week before your high school graduation. but he didn’t like you that way.

admit it or not, jake is a strong candidate. aside from attending the same school as kids, jake was best in math and physics and had a good reputation for being a math wizard.

unconsciously, you tapped the hello! are you available for a meet-up? option.

“shit!” you stand up from the couch.

“mom, that’s a bad word,” aera says while coloring her coloring book at the dinning table.

“you’re right, sweetie. mommy is sorry.” you say and kneeled to reach your daughter’s height. you smile, thinking that your daughter takes after you in her interest in drawing and coloring. she’d always ask you for coloring books, sometimes crayons if her old ones kept breaking. then one time you gave her the 64 crayons that you’ve always wanted as a kid.

“mommy, look!” aera colored the tiger pink.

“that’s wonderful, baby!” aera goes back into coloring while you prepare your dinner.

while you were cooking your spaghetti, your phone beeps and you received a message.

hello there! may i know who i’ll be tutoring?

you reply, it’s my seven-year-old daughter. she needs help in math.

jake: oh i see. may i know who i am speaking with?

you take a deep breath and typed your full name.

jake: y/n? did we go to the same school together?

y/n: yup! same school since 2nd grade to high school.

jake: oh wow! how are you doing?

y/n: i’m doing well right now.

jake: that’s good to hear!

jake: about your daughter, where exactly does she need help in math?

y/n: if it’s not too much to ask, she needs help in everything.

jake: oh no problem! are you available to meet-up?

y/n: sure! will send you the details soon.

jake: great! looking forward to meeting you.

y/n: looking forward to meeting you too.

“oh no!”

you immediately put your phone down and got the pot away from the stove with smoke coming out of it.

you told jake to meet you at this café that is somewhat near where you lived and where jake is residing. it’s been long since you last saw jake and your last encounter with him was at the art room with a banner and lights where you confessed. then he rejected you.

you were holding tight on your cup of coffee. after you told jake where you were seated, you were expecting to meet him anytime soon. and that thought made you more nervous.

“y/n?”

your organs did somersaults when you hear his familiar voice. and when you turn around, you were also greeted with a familiar face.

“j-jake. hi.”

jake still wore glasses. difference is that they were no longer thick black-framed ones but specs. aside from that, he did not change much. he still looked as gentle like before.

“sorry to keep you waiting. one of my students needed help.”

“no worries. please, take a seat.”

jake sits at the seat across you. he places his bag on the floor then he returns his gaze at you.

“sorry i didn’t order anything for you yet. i didn’t know what you liked.”

“it’s okay. so, your daughter needs help?”

“yeah, aera, she…she has trouble understanding problem-solving equations. has a hard time memorizing the multiplication table too, apparently.”

some part of you felt awkward that your daughter got her weakness in math from you. and jake knew that.

“do you have any worksheets from her class?”

“oh, yes,” you bring out the sheets if paper from your bag and gave it to jake. he reviews the papers and you felt déjà vu, remembering the day you first saw him in the library while reading a physics textbook.

“i see the problem here. she mixes the formulas and interchanges them.”

“is she…does she need extreme hands on help?”

“i can’t say yet but if i tutor her soon, i'll let you know the progress.”

“thank you…” you pause, not knowing to call him mr. sim, teacher sim, or just by his name.

“sorry,” you let out an awkward laugh, “i just don’t know how to address you?”

“jake is fine. i mean we went to the same school.”

“okay. thank you, jake.”

“thank you, too. y/n.” then jake gets his bag.

“you’re leaving?”

“yeah, i have to do some tasks first. but let me know when i can tutor her.”

“sure thing. see you soon?”

jake nods, “see you soon.” then he leaves the café.

you and jake agreed that he will tutor aera from 2 pm to 5 pm every thursday and friday. at first, aera is shy to meet a new person but you assured her that her new tutor is a friend of yours. and she promised that she will behave.

the doorbell rang and as you expected, jake was outside.

“hi.”

“hi. i hope i’m not too early.”

“oh, no. you came just in time. come on in.”

when you let jake in your unit, you told him to wait by the living room while you call aera by her bedroom.

“sweetie, your tutor is here. come and say hi.”

when aera came out of her room, her shyness aent away.

“aera, this is jake. he’s going to tutor you at math. say hi, sweetie.”

“hello!” aera waves to jake to which he found adorable and softly giggles.

“it’s nice to meet you, aera.”

“mommy says you’re her friend. i call aunt yujin and aunt gaeul aunties because they’re mommy’s friends. can i call you uncle jake?”

“aera…”

“uncle jake sounds nice.” jake said with a smile on his face.

“do you want us to start, aera?” jake asks and aera nods before pulling jake to the dining table.

before jake and aera started their tutor session, you asked permission from jake if you can stay by your room with the door open. and he was kind enough to understand that you were careful with aera.

surprisingly, jake and aera got along well. aera had a hard time understanding the formulas and comprehending problems but jake was very patient with her. you always knew that jake would be a great teacher but you never knew that day will actually come true.

“okay, so when you add 4 and 7, you’ll be transferring the other one here, to 6. so it becomes 7. then you add 7 and 2. and what’s the answer?”

“91?”

“good job, aera!” then jake did a high five to aera before circling the worksheet with his red pen.

“uncle jake, can you be my math teacher instead? you’re nicer than mrs. im.”

“did you know that mrs. im was also my math teacher. your mom and i were her students.”

“it means that she’s old! no wonder why she’s so grumpy.”

“aera, what did we say about bad mouthing people?” you say from the kitchen as you start preparing your dinner.

“it’s not going to make us different from them.”

“that’s right.”

jake softly laughed at your statement, “okay, aera. that’s all for today. if you still need help next time, we can always go back. but try studying on your own too, okay?”

“okay, uncle jake!”

jake starts packing his things then you and aera see him out.

“uncle jake, thank you for teaching me today. you’re so nice and i had fun.”

“you’re welcome, aera.”

aera looks up at you, “mommy, say thank you, too.”

you rub aera’s shoulders, “yes, ma’am,” then faced jake, “thank you for helping aera today. really.”

“you’re welcome,” jake looks down at aera, “i’ll see you tomorrow, okay kiddo?”

“see you tomorrow, uncle jake!” aera waves and jake gives her a smile before he leaves.

months have passed since jake tutored aera. the process wasn’t easy at first since aera is really having a hard time understanding math. but as jake promised, he updated you that aera is still in need of help to improve. and you were grateful that he was patient with her, despite being exhausted from being a teacher at school.

most days, aera was excited for her tutoring sessions. she even boasts how she has a good tutor and jake’s her favorite teacher slash uncle. and you have to admit, it was cute.

today, you were busy finishing an illustration for a children’s book. most of the time, you sell your works online or have clients contact you for commissions. it wasn’t a stable job but you had to earn for you and your daughter. and thank god, your clients paid you well.

in the middle of working, you received a message from yujin, saying that there will be a class reunion at the town hall two months from now. you didn’t know if you’ll be able to go but you might if your friends are going.

yujin: so how’s the tutoring going on?

y/n: it’s going pretty well, actually. jake is really patient with aera and he always make sure that she understands what he’s teaching her

gaeul: you know…it’s not too late to re-live high schaer

y/n: eh???

yujin: she means to shoot your shot

y/n: very funny guys -_-

y/n: jake is just tutoring aera and he’s just doing his job

gaeul: 👀

yujin: if you say so 🤪

y/n: gotta get ready. i’ll be picking up aera in a bit and jake will be arriving after.

yujin: ooooh y/n is getting ready for her date.

y/n: OH PLEASE 😡

you roll your eyes before locking your phone and turning off your tablet.

when you were done getting dressed, the doorbell rang and when you opened it, you were surprised to see jake.

“hi, jake. i was just about to pick-up aera from school.”

jake scrunches his forehead then looks at his watch, “oh,” he lets out a laugh, “my class ended early and i might have thought i was late. i can come back later.”

“oh no, please. do you want to come with me and pick-up aera? she’ll be glad to see you.”

“sure.”

“great. let’s go.”

during the car ride, you and jake didn’t say a word. it was either you were busy watching the road or avoiding talking to him.

“so how have you been?”

“hm?”

“i mostly see you during tutoring sessions but we never really…'talked.’”

“oh, uh…well today was fine. i’m currently doing an illustration for a children’s book. not halfway done but I’m making progress. you?” you liked to jake before immediately returning your attention to the road.

“one of my students said that physics was useless and why do we need to study how fast a frisbee can travel.”

you try holding your laugh but jake caught you so you retort, “sorry it’s just that a kinda remember myself. and well, i couldn’t help my daughter in her math homework.”

it was silent again and all you could hear was the tires and the car engine.

“for what’s worth, aera is a good kid.”

you smile at jake’s comment and looked at him for a while, “thanks.”

“we’re here.”

“it’s been a while since i saw this place.”

you spot aera waiting at the waiting area and when she sees your car, she stands up and waits for you. and when you and jake got out of the car, she immediately runs to jake, hugging his leg.

“uncle jake, you’re here!”

jake giggles, “it’s good to see you too, kiddo.” then he rubs aera’s head like usual.

“don’t i get a hug?”

“mommy!” aera opens her arms and then you carry her. she gives you a kiss.

“let’s go home?” you asks and aera nods.

the three of you went to the car. aera was still happy that jake was with you to pick her up.

“uncle jake, can you come and pick me up next time?”

“aera, uncle jake has classes to teach. you can still see each other during tutoring sessions.”

aera pouts at what you said. jake looks back, “how about i bring you ice cream next week?”

aera smiles, “yes, please!”

“you might spoil her with too much sweets.” you nag.

“can it be mint chocolate, please?”

jake’s eyes grew wide then he looks at you and back at aera, “you really are your mother’s daughter.”

“hey mint chocolate deserves to be respected,” you defend.

“not when it tastes like toothbrush.”

“that’s mean!” you and aera say in unison.

throughout the whole ride, three of you were still bickering about mint chocolate being the superior ice cream flavor. you never thought that someone could actually get along with you and your daughter’s antics. and you liked it.

“i’m sorry for the overtime, jake. but don’t worry, i’ll increase today’s payment session.”

exams were coming and aera needed help in studying. you felt bad that you had to ask jake to stay for a while but you promised him that he’ll be compensated more than his usual pay.

“it’s alright. besides, aera needed help.”

“why don’t you stay for dinner? you might be hungry.”

“oh, no. i couldn’t.”

“no, really. it’s the least i can do for thanking you.”

“if you insist then,” jake places his bag down the chair, “dinner would be great.”

and dinner was going great. aera told jake herself that jake was her favorite teacher. and jake felt honored. aera kept telling stories of her school life and how she made friends. then aera tells how

“you know, your uncle jake helped everyone in math before. he’s a math wizard.”

“uncle jake, did you help mom math too?”

“i did. she got the 4th highest grade in our math exam.”

“and of course, your uncle jake got the highest grade.”

jake does this hand gesture where he says “oh please.”

“is my mom hard to teach?”

you and jake laughed, “well…let’s say you’re a fast learner than your mother.”

“mommy, i’m better at you in math!”

“i can’t believe you two are teaming up against me,” then you pretend to get shot at the heart and jake and aera laughed at your antics.

after dinner was done, aera became sleepy. she promised that she’ll finish her homework tomorrow. you let her sleep early because she looked exhausted.

“goodnight, uncle jake.” aera says then yawns.

“goodnight, kiddo. you did well today.” jake kneels down and aera hugs jake. you were surprised but jake returned the hug, the sight melted your heart.

“okay, sweetie. uncle jake has to go home and sleep too.” aera pulls away from the hug and then you tell her to get her clothes and take a shower.

“bye, uncle jake.” aera says before getting inside the bathroom.

when it was just you and jake alone, you looked into each other and laughed.

“aera will be sleeping well tonight.”

“yeah, looks like it.”

“hey,” you pause for a while, “thank you. for helping aera. she hasn’t been this happy for a while.”

“thank you for letting me stay.” for some reason, your heart fluttered, “for dinner.”

“oh,” then you let out a chuckle, “you’re welcome.”

you and jake let out another chuckle. and it might seem cringey but you didn’t care. because right now—this felt right. you looking to his eyes, and him doing the same. almost like you didn’t want him to leave.

“i, uh…” jake coughs, “i should probably go.”

“oh. yeah…right. drive safely.”

jake nods before he opens the door, saying goodbye before leaving.

when you closed the door, you let out a breath you realized you haven’t been holding. you’ve replayed how jake looked at you just a while ago. and every time you remembered his face, your heart would beat fast. when you remember him being a good friend to aera, you couldn’t help but melt at his gentleness towards your daughter.

“mommy?” aera walks out of the bathroom with a towel on her shoulders, “are you sick?”

“huh? oh. no, no sweetie.”

“your face is red.”

“it’s just hot sweetie. let’s tuck you to bed, okay?”

after tucking aera to bed, it was your turn to get ready for bed. and when you thought you’ll be able to sleep peacefully, days of jake bonding with your daughter flashed in your mind again. he hated mint chocolate but when he promised to bring a tub of it, he ate it with you and aera. he finished a cup of it and didn’t think of spitting it out or drinking water to cleanse his tongue. one time, when you gave him a glass of water, your fingers touched and you immediately pulled away.

you kept tossing and turning all night. it was like you were your old self, gushing over jake in the smallest things. though this time, you had a daughter. and jake treats her so well that you couldn’t help but smile and melt.

and you wore that smile until you slept peacefully at night.

lately, you’ve been having headaches while feeling muscle pains. when you took a temperature test, it showed that you had fever. you immediately called yujin, saying you needed help to take care of aera. you couldn’t ask your parents help because they have a store to take of at home. besides, you didn’t want them to take a bus all the way here to the city. you were just thankful that yujin was happy to babysit aera while you we sick and you said that you were fine with being alone for now. you told jake about your sickness and aera’s tutoring sessions will be cancelled for now. he hopes for you to get better soon.

“remember to listen to aunt yujin, alright?”

“mhm!”

“and you don’t keep her waiting when she comes to fetch you.”

“yes, mommy!”

“don’t forget to finish your homework, alright? especially math.”

“yes, mommy!” you smile at your daughter then shift your attention to yujin, “thank you for doing this.”

“aera and i will have a good time, don’t worry,” yujin soothes aera’s head.

“i’m going to miss you, sweetie.” sadly, you couldn’t kiss aera goodbye.

“i’m going to miss you too, mommy!”

“okay sweetie, you’re going be late for school.”

aera and yujin say their goodbyes and you were left alone in your home. you lied down on your bed, with a glass of water beside you. you wrapped yourself in your blanket, hoping that it’ll stop you from shivering.

hours have passed and what you’ve been doing is eating, cleaning the used dishes, drinking medicine, and sleeping. you couldn’t wait to get better but you still felt sick and weak.

you were covered in your blanket when your doorbell rang. you wondered if it was yujin but she must be at home this hour, watching over aera.

you wore your mask before getting the door. when you opened it, you were surprised to see jake holding a stainless-steel lunchbox.

“oh, jake. hi.”

“i, uh…i made us some dinner. i made you soup.” jake raises the lunchbox, “i just thought you needed something to warm you up.”

you couldn’t help but melt at jake’s words. he really has this talent of turning small things into something big. and it made your heart flutter.

“come on in.” you opened the door for jake and let him in like always.

“i’ll just get us some plates.” then jake holds your shoulder, “i’ll do it. you can lie down and rest.”

you nod, “okay.” you were about to enter your room but you turn around, “plates and bowls are in the upper right cabinet.”

“got it.”

“and the spoons—” then jake shows you that he found the utensils on the other side of the cabinet.

“i’ll…” you point to your room and jake assures you that he’s got it covered.

you never let anyone in your home aside from your friends and parents. yujin and gaeul have always been pestering you to go on blind dates but you never did. letting someone else in your life was making you a little doubtful. but you were glad that jake is someone you knew and looks trustworthy.

“hey,” jake enters with a tray of the food he brought. you sit up then jake places the tray in front of you.

“what’s tonight’s main course?”

“well, we have ramyeon with ham, boiled eggs, and green onions.”

“sounds delicious.”

“here,” jake scoops some soup and gently blows it before bringing the spoon close to your mouth. you take the soup in your mouth and you smile, “that’s good soup. give my compliments to the chef.”

jake softly laughs, “will do.”

and jake proceeds to feed you the noodles and other toppings. you felt shy every time you couldn’t take the food in your mouth, especially if they were noodles. but jake didn’t judged you. when you were almost done, you drank the remaining soup left.

“you good?”

you nod, “mhm! thanks for the food. how about you?”

“i already ate, don’t worry.” you nod then you drank your medicine.

“um…jake?”

“yeah?”

“thank you for coming over.”

jake smiles, “you’re welcome. you can sleep if you want to.”

“hm? aren’t you…don’t you need to go home and do other things?”

“if it’s alright with you…could i stay for a while? i just figured that you need someone to take care of you right now.”

you couldn’t find the right words to say. jake sim, your highschool classmate, childhood crush, your daughter’s math tutor—is willing to nurse you.

“are you sure?”

“if it’s alright with you. because,” jake slowly brings his hand to your forehead. when you realized what he wanted to do, you leaned forward, letting his hand touch your forehead.

“you’re still burning up.”

the thought of jake sim touching your forehead still causes you to become speechless. when he lets go, you pretended to not be bothered at all.

“are you sure you’ll be okay? i’m a heavy sleeper.”

“i don’t mind. sleep all you want.”

jake takes the tray and helps you fix your pillow, tucking you inside your blanket.

“goodnight, y/n.”

you smile, “goodnight, jake.”

jake was by your side until the day you got better. he cooked you food and let you rest. you felt guilty that he had to nurse you but he wanted to do it wholeheartedly. and your heart fluttered.

you confessed to aera that her uncle jake has been taking care of you while she was away. she was jealous at first because she wanted to take care of you. but you explained to her that you didn’t want to get her sick. she came to her senses and thanked jake that he took care of you. yujin, though, was protective at first but she proceeded to tease you about it.

though lately you’ve realized, your attraction on jake sim was coming back. but this time, you were starting to see him in a different light. he has always been selfless, kind, and gentle but him showing those actions to your daughter made you like him more. but of course, you couldn’t tell him directly how you felt. things were different now that you’re a mom and he’s your daughter’s math tutor.

you’d rather hide your feelings than accept a rejectin. you’ll be reminded that things that come into your life are temporary.

today, you were going to take aera out to a museum for kids. why? because she got a high score in her math exam. while you were sick, aera managed to study on her own and remember the lessons she had with jake. you called jake and told him the news and he felt so proud of her.

“mommy, can uncle jake come with us?”

“i don’t know, sweetie. but i’ll call uncle jake first, okay?” aera nods her head vigorously.

jake’s phone continued ringing and you waited for him to pick-up the call.

“hello, y/n?”

“hey, jake.”

“hi, uncle jake!” aera says and you hear jake laugh.

“aera says hi.”

“well, what’s up?”

“oh…you see, i’m taking aera out today. and we were wondering—i mean she was wondering if…if you wanted to come with us.”

you shake your head, feeling anxious if jake caught you. but that worry disappeared when jake replies, “sure, i mean i’d love to.” and he sounded full of glee.

“g-great! we’ll pick you up then?”

“oh, no. i’ll pick you guys up.”

“oh. but—”

“no, really. i want to pick you guys up.”

“oh,” again, jake’s doing the smallest things can become big. “okay, we’ll be ready by then.”

“okay. see you later.

“see you later.”

never in a long time has jake sim thought that he’ll be meeting y/n again. not in a million years has he also expected to meet y/n’s daughter.

jake sim was just having a regular day: teaching physics at school, checking their papers, and create lesson plans. he goes home, continues checking papers, finishes his lesson plan, and reads more textbooks whether it be math or physics. finally, he washes up, does a little bit of social media, then goes to bed.

jake was used to getting compliments of him being a math genius. many expected him to be a scholar, a professor, an engineer, or a physicist. but it wasn’t that easy. believe it or not, jake sim couldn’t seem to know where he can fit in. he was the golden boy from high school but after he graduated, he became lost and unsure. but he did know he loved math and physics alongside ramyeon noodles.

jake sim does his daily routine when suddenly, he receives a message. he puts his papers down and checks his phone.

hello! are you available for a meet-up?

then he replies, hello there! may i know who i’ll be tutoring?

the sender didn’t reply. he thought that it was the usual ones who reply after an hour or two so he goes back to checking his papers.

after a while, the sender replied.

it’s my seven-year-old daughter. she needs help in math.

jake returns his attention to his phone.

jake: oh i see. may i know who i am speaking with?

the sender sends a familiar name. then jake remembers a girl he frequently heard in school.

jake: y/n? did we go to the same school together?

y/n: yup! same school since 2nd grade to high school.

jake felt like catching up with an old friend. he might have not known you that much but he knew your reputation of being one of his admirers and that you were full of spirit with a good personality. though he did remember you causing some trouble but you weren’t the bad student type. in fact, he remembers you giving him compliments on sticky notes.

jake: great! looking forward to meeting you.

y/n: looking forward to meeting you too.

fast forward to the day jake was going to meet you. it was only a casual meet-up about agreements and how he’ll help your daughter pass math class. he noticed that you seemed worried about your kid but he assured you that he’ll try his best to help her.

and when he met her, he couldn’t help but soften up. meeting aera was like a breath of fresh air to his regular students. aera was willing to listen and learn on her lessons. she was very sweet and fun to be with. her spirit reminded him of yours when you were younger.

“uncle jake, i drew this picture for you.” aera gives him a drawing of him, reading books on the table with a blackboard behind him that had math equations.

“you really drew this?” jake asks amazed at your daughter’s drawing skills.

“mhm! because you’re my favorite teacher and i like you.”

jake couldn’t help but smile at aera. the kid was too cute and sweet to do such a thing. he heard you walking from the kitchen, and you had some biscuits placed inside a bowl.

“for the both of you.”

“thank you, mommy.”

jake notices how aera says “thank you” whether it be small or big actions. he liked that about a kid. but then again, he notices that you do the same. and he can’t help but think that you really are a good  mother.

ever since jake met you and aera, his routine might have become longer than before. but he didn’t mind one bit. not when he can get to help you and aera.

jake’s first reaction of you getting sick was that he got worried. the thought of you sick in bed, alone in your home almost made him loose his mind at class.

“i just figured that you need someone to take care of you right now.”

he knew that you got stressed and tired from taking care of aera. he couldn’t imagine how you managed to get through it in seven years. and he wanted to take care of you.

jake might have had had encounters with women but they weren’t any serious. in his defense, he only went on dates so that sunghoon can stop pestering him.

his bond with you and aera’s was different. the only connection you and jake had was that you both went to the same school. now, you don’t have any status aside from the fact that he’s a math tutor. but he liked it when you ask them how they’re doing and give you snacks. something about your smile and warmth makes him feel comfortable and excited at the same time.

right now, he felt happy feeling that you’re letting him be part of your mother and daughter time.

“uncle jake, have you ever been to a museum?”

“i have. your mother and i went to one in a field trip.”

“mommy says that we’re going to a museum filled with drawings.”

“that sounds fun. you excited?”

“mhm! and it’s more exciting because you’re here.”

jake looks at you, smiling at the interaction. throughout the whole ride, he’s been noticing that you’ve been smiling and giggling the whole ride. and he couldn’t help but gush over it.

the moment the three of you came into the museum, aera couldn’t help but become excited. you let aera be happy and excited but not too much or she’ll break some displays.

you took a picture of aera at the interactive displays. jake took pictures of you and aera, you doing vise versa when aera wanted a picture with him. then aera says that she wanted to have a picture with the three of you. when jake looked at the picture, he couldn’t help but think the three of you looked like a family.

“uncle jake, look! you look like my daddy.”

aera’s words affected both of you. jake has always noticed that your bond with you and aera has changed. but he never noticed that it was beyond that. until now.

“sweetie, let’s go to the mannequins, hm?”

“okay!”

then you carry aera and the two of you happily walk to the mannequins. aera was giggling at how the living mannequin gave her a flower.

suddenly, jake saw you carrying a baby in a living room. then aera comes running to you, and you show her the baby. “here’s your little sister, you say.” then you look at jake, “honey.” aera calls him, “daddy!” then runs to his direction.

“jake!”

he blinks when you called him.

“let’s go?”

“uh, y-yeah. i’ll be right there.”

you had a great time day today. aera was happy to spend her day with you guys and you were happy that she’s happy. jake’s company also made you feel happy. you thought that today’s trip would only be you and aera but with jake, it became a memorable one that you’ll never forget.

aera was sleeping peacefully at the back. you and jake were still awake but both of you were tired.

“she had fun, didn’t she?” jake asks, his eyes focusing on the road.

“she certainly did.

“who knew that she can run so fast?”

“one time, i had to chase her for thirty minutes in a playground. couldn’t catch up with her.”

“she reminds me of you. when we were eight.”

“oh please. anyone can barely put up with my energy.”

“it’s one of the best things about you.”

once again, jake sim made your heart flutter. when the car stops, jake looks at you and you avoid his gaze.

you let out a soft laugh, “yeah. i might have passed it down too much. you might have a hard time catching up with us.”

“i don’t mind. i can catch up just fine.”

then the light turns green and jake starts driving again. you were clutching your hand to your chest. your heart was beating fast that you could barely breathe. you hoped that your heart will have mercy until you got home.

minutes later, you arrived at your home. jake said he can carry aera all the way up to your unit.

you opened the door to aera’s room and jake slowly lies her down. you stand by the doorway and watch jake tuck her in and rub aera’s forehead before he leaves the room. both of you take one last glance at aera before you closed the door.

“thank you for tucking her in. and driving us home.”

“you’re welcome.”

just like the other night, you and jake were standing by the door, staring at each other. both of you didn’t say anything but give each other a look. you recognized that look because you had that look from when you were young and when you met jake again. some part of you felt scared. you never let anyone else in your life, after being left with a baby to raise on your own. but that other part was telling you that you felt happy and excited by letting someone in your life again. when all he showed you was you were worth taking care of.

“jake, i—”

jake didn’t let you finish when his lips landed on yours. his mouth molded perfectly in yours and you couldn’t help but kiss back. jake grabs your nape and the action made you sharply inhale. both of you kissed faster and tried catching each other’s lips. realizing that you’re standing in front if your daughter’s door, you pull away.

“she might hear us.” you whisper and before jake could say anything, you pulled him to your room.

when both of you got inside, you lean at the door and jake kisses you again. this time, you pulled him down by wrapping your arms around his neck. you tried catching your breaths before diving back into each other’s lips. jake slides his hand down to your waist and you let out a whimper. he took that signal as a sign to take off his coat and pull you with him.

you ended up being on top of jake and both if you giggled. you took off your jacket and before you knew it, jake was on top of you. he goes back to kissing you and holding your waist, as you held the sides of his face. jake’s lips left yours as he brushes it to your cheeks, down to your jaw, then down to your neck.

you let out a sigh, feeling euphoria. his touch was gentle and you yearned for it. you pull jake closer and he continues his magic. he slides his hands up then behind your back. you pull jake up and kissed again. he slows his movements this time, getting the rhythm that you wanted.

then realization hit you. this feeling was familiar and the thought was scaring you. the last time you felt this kind of attraction, that person was temporary in your life. you knew that jake was too. eventually, you and jake will part ways when his task is done.

“jake…” you say when you pull away. but jake doesn’t hear you and latches his lips on your neck again.

“wait. jake, stop.”

then jake finally hears you and his eyes looked worried.

“did i hurt you?”

“no. no, no. i…”

you couldn’t look at him in the eye. when you stood up, you brushed your hair back and looked at anywhere else.

“is everything okay?”

“i’m sorry. i don’t…”

you covered your face out if embarrassment, along with fear.

“y/n?” jake holds your arm. his touch made you slowly uncover your face.

“are you okay?”

“i’m…i’m scared.”

jake looks at you with his soft eyes. he places his hand on your cheek and you can feel the tears falling from your eyes.

“oh, no. don’t cry.”

but you did. you let yourself be pulled by jake’s embrace. jake calms you down by rubbing your back.

“everything is going to be alright. i'm here.”

for the first time, you’re actually believing those words.

after crying and staying silent for hours, you finally had the courage to tell jake your sturggles.

“I met this guy in college. he was a year older than me but we took the same class.

“we went on a few dates before we became official. we had a plan. we graduate, gets jobs, get married, and eventually start a family.

“getting drunk at the graduation party was not part of it. getting pregnant after the party—not at all.”

jake continues to hold your hand as both of you lie down on your bed. he let you rest your head on his shoulder as you tell your story. jake sympathized with you, waiting for you to finish what you wanted to say.

“i told him but he said he was sticking to his plan. so he’s completely out of the picture and i raised aera on my own.

“ever since then, i was so scared of letting anyone in my life again. it scares me.

“i’m sorry.”

jake puts his hand on your cheek and you face him.

“don’t be. you’re allowed to feel what you feel.”

you give jake a smile, still feeling your eyes swell. but you were thankful that jake was very understanding.

“thank you for listening.”

“thank you for telling me.”

jake soothes your back and you didn’t notice that you fell asleep in his arms.

after that night, you and jake exchanged “hi’s” awkwardly. but you tried your best not to show aera or let it affect you and jake’s agreement.

weeks passed, you and jake grew out of your awkward phase and became more comfortable eith each other. but he never forced you to start anything with him. he continued being a great father-figure to aera.

you can say that what you had was unlabeled but a part of you knows that you were starting to fall in love with jake. but you were afraid to tell him.

you were just washing the dishes after jake and aera finished their cakes. then aera’s question made you stop.

“uncle jake, if i get a high grade in math, does that mean you won’t be going here anymore?”

“of course not, kiddo. why would you think that?”

“because after i get a high grade, you won’t be teaching me anymore.”

“well, yes…because you already know how to do math. but…” at this point, you were looking at jake then he continues, “it doesn’t mean i'll stop visiting you.”

“really?”

“really.”

then aera hugs jake and he hugged her back.

“if you ace the final exam, we’ll eat mint chocolate ice cream together.” then jake looks at you.

“okay!”

aera did her best and jake was beyond proud of her. you were too. you were proud for the both of them. seeing jake with aera, you thought that he can be more than a father-figure. you knew that both of them have a special bond that is more than a tutor and student.

the next days, jake was starting to stay at home longer. he was so familiar with the place that he remembers where you keep your plates and utensils. one time, the three of you played monopoly and you didn’t remember how long you played because the three of you were having fun. jake declared himself as the winner even though there is no real winner in monopoly.

some nights, you and jake would tuck aera together and she liked it. she never complained about having a father but with jake becoming part of your lives, it was like a dream come true for her.

“i don’t know if me hanging out longer looks like i'm invading your home.”

“i don’t mind. besides, we like having you around.”

you and jake were alone in the living room. drinking a glass of wine while having late night conversations.

“do you maybe…want us to go out sometime? just the two of us.”

“yeah. i’d love that.”

“great. it’s a date then.”

you were surprised but you liked it.

“yes, jake. it’s a date.”

you lean on the couch with the glass on your right hand. jake leans in the couch too, looking at you softly.

“it’s weird though.”

“what is?”

“that i never got to see how amazing you are. you’re not just the girl who causes trouble or teachers dislike for drawing in class.”

“to be fair, i never realized how good you are with kids. it’s making me hard not to fall for you.”

you didn’t know if it was the alcohol. but you suddenly confessing your feelings for jake sim was somehow déjà vu.

“i’ll, uh,” you put down your glass, “i’ll make us some coffee.”

you stand up and was about to go to the kitchen when jake pulls you around and kisses you. you kissed him back, tasting the red sine you just drank. jake holds your cheek and you lean forward, holding his waist.

when you pull away, your eyes were still closed but you can feel jake’s breath on your lips.

“i love you.”

you open your eyes and jake was smiling at you. His cheeks were red. might be from the wine or from the proximity and confession he just said.

 “i’m not drunk am i?”

jake smirks, “i don’t think so.” then kisses you again, and you pull him closer.

“thank you for accepting me.” you whisper at his lips.

“no. thank you for accepting me.”

who would’ve thought that a bottle of red wine was all you needed for the perfect confession. but for now, you needed to make two cups of coffee so you and jake can have a proper conversation.

when you told aera the news, you told her that you loved jake like how anne loves gilbert and that jake loves you the same. then aera follows, “but didn’t you already know?” and you were caught off guard.

nevertheless, aera liked the idea of you and jake being together. you haven’t told her about how you met jake. but one day you will so that she’ll know that the right person will come along in time.

just as jake promised you, both of you will be going on a date together. you asked where you’ll be going but he said it was a surprise.

so you dressed up wearing a denim dress that you thought you’ll never use. you wore the necklace your mother gave you when you graduated high school. it felt weird when you asked aera if you looked okay. but she says that you look beautiful as ever. both yujin and gaeul wanted to babysit her this time. but you also knew that they wanted to see you finally having your date with jake sim. but they were hapoy for you that you finally found someone.

“you really don’t want to tell me where we’re going?”

“not a chance.”

you roll your eyes but you knew that jake was trying to give you a date you can remember.

minutes later, the scenery changed into a lake. the water was shining and the grass was turning to a yellow green color thanks to the sunlight. your jaw dropped at the scenery. it was like an actual painting.

when jake stopped the car, he immediately got out and opened the door for you.

“i wanted to find a place only for us.”

“how did you find this place?”

“had a little help from sunghoon and jay.”

“oh how are those two anyway?”

“they’re doing well, actually. jay is engaged and sunghoon is in denial that he’s crushing on his workmate.

you laugh, remembering sunghoon for his schemes and playboy antics. you remember him teasing jake about a girl he liked in high school.

“you okay?”

“hm?”

“you look grumpy.”

“oh.” you shake your head and grab the picnic basket from jake, “come on!”

the whole picnic, you and jake did some catching up. you told him that your parents are still residing in your hometown and your mom’s flower shop is still om business. your dad retired long ago and he just stays at home. jake’s parents were in australia and they were professors in two different universities.

“i suddenly remembered something. weren’t you supposed to move back to australia after high school?”

jake looks down at your figure, “you trying to get rid of me?” then you give jake a “really?” look and he laughs. you sit up and looked at him, placing your palm on his chest. jake was looking up at the sky, thinking deep.

“it was planned, yes. honestly, i was happy to be back home for a while but…something was telling me that i had to be somewhere else.

“i told my parents that i wanted to go back here. they were hesitant at first but i told them to trust me.”

“and did you find what you were looking for?”

“i did,” then he looks at you, “and i realized that i made the right choice to come home.”

“welcome home, jake.” you leaned down and intended to give him a quick kiss but he leans his face forward, trapping your lips.

“that wasn’t fair.”

“i love you too.”

you laugh but gave jake quick pecks and kept saying “I love you’s” in between. you were afraid of being too affectionate but you couldn’t help but show them when jake showers you a lot of it.

jake giggles like a kid then he hovers over you and it was his turn to attack you with kisses.

then both of you ate the sandwiches he made then watched the sunset together. and it was better than any romance movie you watched.

you and jake didn’t really care if you wanted to go public with your relationship. but now that both of you are driving back to your home town for the reunion, you couldn’t help but be nervous. everyone in high school knew your reputation especially that jake was involved. they don’t even know that you’re a single mom of a seven-year-old girl. and now, you’re dating the boy you had a crush on.

your friends won’t be coming because they had to babysit aera. you were hesitant at first to go but you promised jake that you’ll come with him. also, he really wanted to introduce you as his girlfriend to his friends.

“you ready?” jake unbuckles his seatbelt and then he notices you tensing up.

“you okay, baby?”

“what? oh. y-yeah. maybe not?”

“i’ll be with you the whole time,” jake places his hand on yours, “okay?”

you gulp then nod, “okay.”

jake unbuckles your seatbelt, “let’s go.”

when you and jake entered the hall, everyone was in their tables, probably chatting about their careers and relationships. they were all familiar faces. chaewon, the former class president, was chatting with your former homeroom teacher, mrs. bang. somi, one of jake’s admirers was with a date. ej was with his friend nicholas. those two were hard to separate.

“jake, my man!”

you and jake turn around and see jay approaching you. he and jake gave a brotherly hug. then out of no where, sunghoon barges in and headlocks jake.

“dude!”

“sim jaeyun is here!”

and apparently it caught everyone’s attention and they began whispering when they saw you with the famous “02z of daebom high.”

“so…jake.” sunghoon eyes you then back to jake, raising his eyebrows up and down.

“sunghoon, jay, you remember y/n, don’t you?” jake places his hand around your waist.

“how could we forget when she always screams in the hallways 'jake sim jjan!’ or ‘jakey, the sun can’t shine without your existence in the world!’”

“oh please, don’t.” your face becomes red from embarrassment.

“but y/n, i have to say, it’s about time jake did something more than spend his time on paperwork.”

the four of you chatted for a while before finding a table for the four of you. being in the same table with the three flower boys was your high school dream. it felt weird that it came true after many years but in different circumstances.

“baby, want something to eat?”

“not that hungry, thank you.”

“how about some appetizers?”

“meatballs with cheese would be nice though.”

“i’ll be right back,” jake eyes his friends, “be nice.”

“yes, sir!” sunghoon and jay do a salute before jake leaves you with them.

“y/n, tell me. has jake been giving you headaches?”

“no, actually, he’s been helping me a lot. he’d drop by and help tutor my daughter. then we’d have movie nights until we tuck aera to sleep. we go and do the most mundane dates but with him…he makes it so special.”

then you noticed jay and sunghoon just looking at you in awe.

“you really love him, don’t you?”

you nod, “i do. very much.”

“he may not be telling you this but, ever since he met you, his boring, ordinary life became vibrant and full of joy. i’ve never seen him that happy since.”

jay’s words made you feel accepted. he has always had a way with words but it was the first time you actually heard it.

“thanks, jay.”

“y/n, in case he does do something stupid, just give him a smack in the head and he’ll come around.”

“will try to remember that, sunghoon.”

“meatballs for my lady,” jake places the plate in front of you. jay and sunghoon were about to get some when jake slaps their hands.

“go get your own.”

jay was about to slap jake’s shoulder when mrs. bang starts to speak.

“class of 20xx, i’d like to start this reunion by saying, welcome home.”

everyone claps and you follow. your homeroom teacher continues by saying that there will be a program performed by somi and her friends. like before, she’s always had charisma when performing on stage.

there was games. pocky games were always the best. jay and sunghoon did it by vote. everyone cheered when the pocky stick became small in very bite. both of them didn’t want to loose but they didn’t want to touch each other’s lips either so jay took the fall.

there were some awardings too. the life of the party: sunghoon. shy prince: ej. math wizard: your jake. you got the artist award.

the event was still on-going but you and jake left early. you wanted jake to formally meet your parents.

on the drive going there, you felt nervous but you didn’t want to let jake know. as for jake, you can sense that he’s nervous because he was biting his tongue while looking at his feet.

“baby,” you call jake and when he turns around, “you cup his face.”

“they’re going to love you.”

this time, you’re assuring jake. you felt nervous too but you love jake and you know that he’s a good man that your parents will love.

you and jake waited for someone to answer the door. and when it opened, your mom answers it.

“hi, mom. dad.”

“y/n? who’s this?”

“this is jake. he’s my boyfriend.”

and your parents ended up loving jake. they remember him when you mentioned you went to daebom high together. suddenly, they told jake stories about you gushing over jake. you figured that you had quite the reputation here in town.

“oh jake, you should’ve seen y/n write your name at the back of her notebook with hearts.”

“mom!” you cover your face but your parents kept teasing you.

“jake, y/n might seem the free spirit type but she’s someone who has a big heart.”

“yes, sir. and i'll take care of her and aera.”

your dad kept offering jake some alcohol but you kept reminding him that both of you need to drive home. but a twist of events lead to jake becoming wasted and your parents saying that both of you should spend the night here.

“mom, i have to see aera.”

“y/n, you’re tired and jake is drunk. now, i don’t want both of you getting into an accident.”

you sigh, “yes, mom.”

you carried jake to your old room and lie him on his back. he kept calling your name but you just laughed, finding him cute with his red face.

“baby, i need to take off your shirt. okay?”

jake pouts and covers his chest, “my girlfriend will get mad at me.”

“jake, it’s me.”

jake slowly opens his eyes, “oHhh y/n!”

just like that, jake was fast asleep. you slowly lifted him so he can sit up. when he was sitting on the head board, you gently unbuttoned his shirt. you were thankful that he was wearing a white shirt inside. after that, you positioned him facing the side with a pillow under his head.

“talk about ‘i’ll take care of her.’”

you laugh softly but you lightly jake’s head. he looked really cute. sleeping like a baby.

“y/n…” jake says  slurring in his sleep.

“you and aera,” he lets out a hiccup, “are the best thing,” another hiccup, “that’s ever happened to me.”

for so long, you were so scared that when you let someone in your life, they’d leave you. for a while, you thought that you were content that it was just you and your daughter against the world. but eventually, this man right here, drunk and sleep talking is going to be a good father to aera. this man right here is the one you want to spend the rest if your life with.

you’ve been dating for a while now and he has been dropping by your place almost every day. so you asked him to move in with you. it wasn’t anything new except that jake doesn’t have to drive before he gets to see you and aera.

and when you slept at the same bed for the first time, it was a little awkward. but like before, both of you adjusted and got used to it.

you and jake would cuddle before you go to bed. he’d be the big spoon, whether you were facing behind him or you were lying on his chest.

“you know, i should’ve asked you sooner.”

“be grateful that i said yes in a heartbeat.”

“oh, thank you, sir jake.” you teasingly thank him like he was a knight.

the rest of the night, you’d have tickle fights until both of you will snuggle until you sleep.

but like any other relationship, there were always misunderstandings and conflicts.

“jake, all i'm saying is that we don’t have enough money to buy a new place.”

“y/n, i have enough to get us one.”

“didn’t it come across your mind that we should be buying it together?”

“well if maybe your job was—”

“what, jake? if i were a teacher, earning a monthly salary like you?”

“y/n, that’s not what i meant.”

but you walked out before he could finish. you didn’t talk to jake for the rest of the night. jake waa in the living room while you stayed in your bedroom. you were thankful that aera was oblivious to the situation.

after an hour, jake went inside your room and you were facing behind him.

“y/n…”

you didn’t say anything.

“i’m sorry. i shouldn’t have said that.”

“you think?”

“i just thought that if we get a new place, we’d finally settle in a home as a family. but truth is, wherever you are…you are my home.”

you finally turn around, but all you could do was stare at jake as he waits for you to say something.

“did you say family?”

‘yeah. i did.”

you didn’t think before hugging jake. he hugs you back, burying his face on your neck.

you and jake agreed that when the time is right, you’ll get a new place and everything else will fall into place.

you’ve been thinking for a while about what jake said. you did consider moving to a new place but your savings weren’t enough. but you also wanted to start a new life with jake in it.

so you decided to find a full-time job as an art teacher for elementary students. hoping that you’ll have enough income for your family’s future. and no, you didn’t force yourself. you choice this because it’s for the ones you love.

“ms. y/n, am i doing a okay?”

“you’re doing great, jungwon!” you give your student a big smile.

“niki you’re doing great too!”

you never fail to compliment your students. you might not have the best audiences when you were young. but you didn’t want to crush children’s dreams when they remind you of how you were.

“okay, kids. don’t forget that your homework is due tomorrow.”

you were thankful that your class was the last one. you were in the middle of fixing your things when someone knocked at the door.

“hey.”

“hey. your class is done?”

“yeah. well, i clocked out early.”

oh, right. jake finally became a full-time math teacher. both of you work at the same school. he thought that he should be helping you so you can get a new place. besides, it’s a great opportunity for him to go home with you and aera.

“are you not feeling well?” you stand up and held jake’s forehead but he shakes his head.

“actually, we are going out for a while.”

your eyes grew wide, “where are we going?”

“i’ll tell you when we get there.”

“jake.”

“it’s going to be fun,” you raised your brow at jake then he says, “i promise.”

next thing you knew, you and jake were in the car taking the route to  your hometown. the next surprising thing is when he parked in front of your old school.

“what are we doing here?”

jake just gives you a smile before getting out of the car. he opens the door for you, kneeling down.

“come with me.”

it might seem weird that jake always makes your heart flutter for the bare minimum but heck, this is jake sim we’re talking about.

both if you were walking down the hallways of the school. it felt weird walking in the same place where you called jake’s name to get his attention. now, you’re holding each other’s hand.

“don’t worry, the teachers know that we’re visiting.”

“any reason why we’re visiting?”

“when we reach the end of the hall, you’ll know.”

so you and jake continue walking. both of you stop then jake holds your hand.

“for this part, i'm going to need you to close your eyes.”

you were hesitant at first but you did what jake asked. he was holding your hand the whole time you walked with your eyes closed. then he stopped.

“wait a minute.”

jake’s lets go if your hand.

“you can open them now.”

you were greeted with lights behind jake. the banner with the sign, “will you accept me?” then you realized that this is how you confessed to jake in high school. and you’re in the same room.

jake was holding a bouquet with pink, white, and red roses with baby’s breath. and he had a ring on his other hand.

“y/n, i never would’ve thought that my boring, plain, life would be so colorful, vibrant, and joyful. you and aera…i couldn’t imagine how my life would turn out if you weren’t in my life. you let me become part of your life, and i want to spend my remaining days with you and our family.”

“so,” jake kneels down in front of you. the action caught your breath away.

“will you accept me?”

you gave yourself a minute to process what was happening. and when you did, you finally say…

“jake, i appreciate what you have done but…

“it would be a shame if i don’t say yes.”

you laugh and you let your tears fall on your face.

“yes, yes, yes.”

 jake stands up and finally gives you a tight hug. you bury your face in his chest.

jake kisses your head and whispers, “i love you.”

you lift your head up, “i love you.”

the last time you fell in love, things might not have gone the way you wanted them to. you doubted a lot of things and distanced yourself. then you met a man who proved to you that you deserve a second chance.

this time, you were sure that it will be different and will be the best thing that has ever happened to you.

***

epilogue

#ENHYPENWRITERS #enhypen au #enhypen jake au #enhypen jake x reader #enhypen jaeyun x reader #enhypen fluff #enhypen jake fluff #enhypen angst #enhypen jake angst #enhypen jaeyun #enhypen jaeyun fluff #enhypen jaeyun angst #enhypen jake x reader fluff #enhypen jake x reader angst #jake sim au #sim jaeyun #jake au #jaeyun au

[nothomegal]

Broo please Hear me out.. how would y/n react to pyramid Head/pyra giving them a paper flower??

(i bet pyra saw some survivor make a paper flower and just watched how they made it so he could make one for you cause like there's no actual flowers in silent hill)

Aww that's so sweet! Hope you don't mind if I respond with a lil' fic instead of a messy doodle 😅 I just have so many things to say!

"Little flower"

(Pyramid Head x GN Reader)

Warnings: none, just fluff!

World count: 1.6k

—"What you're thinking about, big guy?"—

The voice of his human awokened the monster out if his erratic state. By the look on (Y/N)'s face, it seems like they've been trying to get his attention for a little while.

—“Is everything alright?"—

He let out a short metallic clank and nodded ones.

—“Just zoned out I see.”— you chuckle as you lean against his broad shoulder. —“I was daydreaming too, but had to stop when someone began to squeeze me a bit too much."— you add.

Squeeze-? Oh, right. The beast was currently walking through a corridor of the building they've unofficially turned into their home. Only that, Pyra was the one moving. (Y/N) meanwhile was being carried by the monster, their body effortlessly supported and held closely by one massive arm of their lover, whose grip was a bit too tight at that moment.

The two of them were silent most of the walk, just enjoying the presence of the other one. But the quietness was interrupted when (Y/N) softly hummed.

—"Have I ever told you you're very handsome?"— you playfully say as you look at his pyramid shaped helmet.

(Y/N) couldn't hide their grin, not when their lover lowered his head down as if he got flustered. Only when a small giggle escaped them is when Pyra squeezed them against himself, causing them to laugh instead.

—"Alright alright, I get it. No saying pretty things about the big scary Pyramid Head."—

Pyra doesn't react to their comment, at first. But soon a quiet little growl would slip from inside his helmet as he moves it to then gently nuzzle one of the edges against them. (Y/N) giggles again, and responds to the gesture by running one hand along the rough metallic surface of their lover's head.

Pyra's been acting very clingy since he had returned. A few hours prior he had left abrubtly, leaving his little human all confused. Despite being a tag startled, (Y/N) wasn’t too concerned, probably his duty as an executioner and punisher of Silent Hill calling. But imagine their surprise that when as soon as he came back, instead of a usual greeting like nuzzling his helmet against them or licking their cheek, the monster simply yoinked them up and began to walk with them in his arms.

The whole time their walk lasted, (Y/N) couldn't stop thinking about what Pyra could have in mind. They've been his for a long time already and know that things never happen out of the blue with him, there is always some sort a reason for everything he does. Though some could be quite... Silly or small, maybe straight up petty. (like when they were 'too tolerant' with a Creeper, a fucking bug. Jeez they probably were carried and manhandled like a rag-doll for a week-)

They zone back in when Pyra suddenly stops and gently sets them back on their feet. (Y/N) eyes the room curiously, but it seemed to have nothing out of the ordinary or special, just another abandoned room of Silent Hill.

—"So... You want to chill in here for..."—

Their voice quietens when the beast suddenly sticks the sword into the floor and stalks towards one of the few furnitures the room had. (Y/N) observes him in silence, curiosuty slowly morphing in confussion when they witness their lover open and take something from the inside. Huh? Okay... That's something new.

And the silence remains even when the monster turns back and begins to make his way towards them.

The executioner is known for his brutality and determination, never backing away or leaving his victim be, always hunting them down and providing the scariest of the punishments...

This is how everyone viewed him. Viewed it.

(Y/N)? They already seen a side of him that no mortal or creature could ever imagine, but it seems like such side had corners yet to reveal.

When close enough, Pyra reaches for (Y/N)'s hand and brings it towards himself, their palm facing up. Then, he places...

—"...!?"—

(Y/N)'s breath shakes a little and eyes wide when they see what was placed on their hand.

Flowers. Paper flowers.

The time seemed to freeze and reality fade away. (Y/N) couldn't believe their eyes. Pyra... Pyramid Head himself, just gave them a gift?...

They take in the apparence of said gift. The flowers weren't perfect, more like a bunch of scrunched paper shaped the best it can be into a flower. But even if the result wasn't the most perfect, the effort and care put into these was reflected... Wait, did...

(Y/N) slowly drags their gaze towards the monster, who was standing in front of them completely still.

...Did he made these?

...For them?

The silence was suffocating. (Y/N) remained frozen in place, their eyes now directed again to the flowers but their gaze seemed lost. The beast remained just as still, even his breathing got quieter.

Pyra is known for his steel composure. He never experienced anything like fear or anxiety. If anything, he is the sourse of these. But now? Now he's probably feeling something of this for the first time of his existence. Was that a bad decision? Did he reopened the already scarred wounds by reminding (Y/N) of the real world and the fact that they've been gone for so long? That they will never return to see the real flowers and life without him going absolutelly ballistic about it?

Maybe it is, maybe it was a bad idea... But the attempt was worth it, right?... They always observed the few pictures and paintings of nature with such fond eyes, trying to take in and store that little piece of landscape into their memory. They always showed particular likeness to flowers, sometimes drawing those and commenting which are their favorites. He never really got the point of these though, but (Y/N) liked them so it had to be important.

Only when he witnessed some unfortunate newcomer making some using paper, is when he really started to think about it. And after seeing how (Y/N) perked up when they saw yet another landscape drawing, something just snapped inside of him and he knew he had to take action.

And now, seeing how still his human is, he really began to second guess his decision. They must be dissapointed with the results, he had to try harder and be more careful... But it's so damn hard to fold the paper without breaking it with these damn huge hands of his-.

The sudden sensation of arms wrapping tightly around his waist pulled the monster out of his thoughts. Pyra tilts his helmet down, looking at (Y/N), who's face was hidden in his chest. Their shoulders would shake at times and a muffled huff would come out... Are... Arethey sobbing?

Pyra of course tensed, clearly affected by seeing his lover cry. But when (Y/N) lifted their head and looked up at him...

—"Thank you... Thank you so much...!"—

Yes, there were tears in their eyes... And so the shine of absolute hapiness and gratitude, so pure that it resembled the eyes of an angel, at least to him.

—"I-... It's just-..."— you let out a small chuckle as you struggle to put your thoughts and emotions into words. —"It's just... No one ever did something so... So loving and special for me."—

(Y/N) falls silent again as they snuggle closer to Pyra, most likely realizing that no ammount of words could express just how thankful they were. As they're clinging to their lover like a lifeline, they feel his body slowly relax and then contract just enough for him to wrap his arms around their form, hugging them back.

They stayed like this for a good ammount of minutes, just holding each other while (Y/N) spoke time to time, gifting Pyra with their lovely voice and more gratitude. It's a small thing, yes, but for (Y/N) is huge. Especially because a creature who never even concerned itself with such silly meaningless things like flowers made it, putting its time and effort into the gift for them.

When it became clear that the snuggles wouldn't end anytime soon, (Y/N)'s body is suddenly lifted into the air and swung over a shoulder to then be carried towards the closest wall. Despite being manhandled, (Y/N) couldn't stop smiling and would often giggle as they're transported like a sack of potatos. It's a bit of a contrast with the usual gentleness their partner handles them. But hey, Pyra's allowed to have some fun too!

They're both soon settled down, embracing each other once again. Pyra sitting and leaning against the wall while (Y/N) is cofortably nestled on his lap and against his chest. They observe the paper flowers, fingers carefully tracing along the imperfect petals that they're looking at with such love-filled eyes.

—"They're beautuful, really. You're very talented."—

A small rumbling groan escapes from Pyra's helmet as he tights his grip around them.

—"I'm serious! You're an amazing artist!"— you exclaim. —"Just look! Your hands and strenght have the triple of my size and power yet you still managed to make it look like a flower! Bet If I tried to make one it would end up looking like some cursed paper mess."—

He groans, clearly disagreeing with their statement. (Y/N) simply sighs with a giggle.

—"If you don't believe me then we could try to make some more later."— you cassually comment.

Pyra remains quiet, thinking. Eventually he makes a noise and dips his head in a small nod, agreeing with the suggestion. (Y/N) smiles, their eyes sparkling with excitement and joy, as genuine as from a little kid. 

The monster would definitely smile if he had a face for it. He haven't seen (Y/N) this bright and alive ever since they realized their feelings for each other are mutual.

Looks like his assumptions were right, flowers indeed are important for his human if it made them feel like this.

To be honest...

He kinda likes them too now.

#nothomegal ask reply #nothomegal fic #pyramid head #pyramid head x reader #gn reader #pyramid head x y/n #slasher fluff

[elizais]

black and blue

pm!reader x chuuya summary: reader comes back from a long mission exhausted, hurt/comfort, chuuya takes care of you warnings: alcohol, injuries

mori knew you would be gone for a few weeks, but chuuya knew you would be gone for too long. everyone knew about you and chuuya, staying in their line but always discussing how the executive who put people in their place was with the only ray of sunshine in the organisation. executive nakahara did care for his subordinates, but didn't show it like you did. you weren't open about how you joined but everyone had their theories because it didn't add up compared to your kind nature. only a few people knew why you were there, you didn't dwell on it. you didn't enjoy this line of work but you done it to protect the city you held so dear to your heart.

you had been at the port mafia for so long your only boss was mori, you stood with the executives. fortunately, this meant less missions away and taking care of your people in your section. unfortunately.. this meant the most important assignments went to your level. it just so happened to be that your specialised skills were the only ones to fit this task. it was dropped on you at an executives meeting. mori sat in his chair at the end of the table. looking up and down his sheet of paper, every last executive bored to death.

you looked at chuuya across from you, finishing your doodle with a smile. elise was sat next to you and the other side of you was kouyou. you lifted up the notepad so that chuuya saw the blank side of it and you nudged elise. she began to laugh at your very unflattering drawing of a carrot wearing a hat. knowing exactly who it was directed to. in the middle of entertaining elise, mori spoke again after inspecting details on the document that could upset a room in seconds.

he cleared his throat as he said, "there is an incredibly strong organisation emerging in another city. it will have to be taken down by one of you guys." he paused as he inspected the faces of the people who carried this city on their shoulders with him.

despite your playful nature, mori knew better than most how serious you could be for the sake of your home. "it will be y/n." he watched elise's face drop almost as fast as the colour drained from chuuya's face. no matter the amount of protesting from other executives, elise, even the lowest members (most likely only caring because chuuya is less likely to be angry when you are around). mori had told you that in two days time, you would leave for at least a week.

and that is what lead you to now. chuuya had been noticeably off his game for the past 12 days, everyone knew the reason. no contact was allowed at all. but, as he settled in to being back at the large penthouse after another long day, the home your paychecks covered more than comfortably, that felt a little larger now. the man got up to pour himself a glass of wine, allowing the screen on the wall to load up. as he sat back down and flicked through the mindless tv shows on, a groan came from behind the elevator after the familiar noise of an incorrect code, and then the ding of the correct one. his body immediately knew who it was, his face lit up and he forgot about everything bad in the world.

until, the person who he wished he could always be around was looking at him through bloodshot eyes surrounded by ominous dark circles. his idea of happiness and all things lovely was leaning on the wall for support with an unusual unkempt look.

his love looked like she fought a bear in the elevator, she saw him for the first time and allowed her tired face to use the last of her energy to smile. he immediately ran over to you. you had sunk against the wall with your legs in front of you. chuuya thought he was under a horrible ability until you spoke to him "i missed you, chu.." you spoke croaky, weak and coarse. your broken voice pierced his heart with the shards it left in the air.

your scalp had dried blood clinging to it, every other inch of your body scraped and scratched. he was thankful there weren't any deeper wounds, other than the one that appeared inside of him. "c'mere doll," he spoke to you, barely above a whisper. despite what many think, he is still exceptionally strong without his ability. seamlessly, he picked you up from under your shoulders, pressing your chest to his and allowing your head to look over his shoulder. "let's get you a bath." he finished as he carried your body through the corridors of your home.

he was thankful that your 'expensive taste in bathrooms' (as he always teased) lead to large, marble counters attached to the wall, so he could let you sit on them and lean against the wall as he ran the water into the corner bathtub you also insisted on getting. "do you want to talk about it?" he asked you with his sympathetic tone. "mori was not joking when he said they were strong.." you tried to laugh out but it came out emotionless as you looked at chuuya grabbing the bandages in the cupboard. "you don't need to try and keep everyone in a good mood at the cost of your own, y/n" he responded with his back turned to you.

"aren't those the ones dazai has for when he comes over for a movie night?" you dodged his previous statement with your question. chuuya scowled at the mention of his name even though you know he trusts him.

"yes, they are. damn mackerel always inviting himself over." he spoke as he grabbed a washcloth to gently clean your face whilst taking off your clothing. you knew he wasn't doing it in a sexual manner and was genuinely worried. "did you take down their boss?" he spoke after a comfortable silence. "barely." you sighed.

after he cleaned the dried dirt off with the washcloth, he lifted you into the bath and soon he followed suit, grabbing a gentle shampoo, the matching conditioner for your hair, and a hairbrush. he was not sure if you even saw the state your hair that you love dearly was in.

as he sat down by you in the tub, he turned your head so he could brush your hair, gently wetting it so that it would be easier to get through. you leaned back, almost falling asleep. he didn't mention the jagged cuts in your hair or the thinner patches. he could tell you were in a close combat fight and his heart broke. chuuya assumed you hadn't seen your hair yet, he didn't ask as you had finally steadied yourself since arriving home.

he didn't notice you falling asleep until your head fell to his chest, using his gravity manipulation to keep you sat upright without noticing as he finished taking care of your hair.

eventually, he dried your body and hair whilst moving you with his ability so you could stay asleep. waking up the next morning in your bed like you should.

#bungou stray dogs #bsd #bungo stray dogs #bungou stray dogs x reader #port mafia #chuuya x reader #bsd chuuya #chuuya nakahara #nakahara chūya #nakahara chuuya #chuuya nakahara x reader

[somethingheavenknows]

reputation

pairing: coriolanus snow x female reader

summary: all you’ve ever wanted was to see a flaw in coriolanus, to prove he wasn’t all he said he was. but when you catch him with his guard down, you’re everything but vengeful.

tags/content warnings⚠️: a little bit of mutual hatred that isn’t real, pet names, fingering, oral (female receiving), inferred overstimulation and nonverbal state if you squint. just coryo being cute and inexperienced but bold, for those of us who dare to dream !!!

**smut at the end but lots of long admiring how hot his arms are before that to make up for making you wait

word count: 5,824 (long, i know. i got carried away!)

nsfw content below the cut. i’m not your mother, but either way, proceed with caution.

coriolanus snow has a reputation. everyone knows that.

nobody likes him, yet they tolerate him, because he is not only the prized possession of dr. gaul’s precious hunger games, but he is the darling of the capitol- he is their emblem, their spokesman, the face of the new generation. every girl’s head lolls in adoration when he passes, and his peers sneer when every adult he comes across greets him as our future president, while he sits back and smiles.

at first, you didn’t like him either. you didn’t like his demeanor or the lightning white color of his hair. you hated how every time he spoke, it was eloquent yet condescending, no matter who it was he spoke to. you hated the way his eyes evaluated everyone, yet always settled on you with uncertainty. your biggest issue with coriolanus, though, was how there was not one visible flaw to make him human. his hands did not shake, nor did his voice. his university exams came back spotless and adorned with two zeros every time. his shirts were starched to a stiffness that would only be comfortable for a man so stiff and rigid as he, and his shellacked platinum locks carved a perfect quaff of stone atop his marble cheeks and crystal eyes. more than anything in the world, you wished to see something to dismantle the perfection of him, to watch him doubt himself or miss a button hole.

coriolanus never intended for anyone to see such a falter, because he only allows imperfection for himself when he is alone. when he is elbows deep in textbooks in a locked university classroom, he might unbutton his collared shirt to breathe; when he’s at home behind his bedroom door, he could comb through his hair and let it fall as it had back at the academy. but he was calculated, as was his persona. nobody was going to see him misstep, and they certainly would not see him fail. but poor coriolanus, so obsessed with perfection that it’s made him paranoid, forgot the little details from time to time.

it was only when he settled in a group study room in the library, believing it was a single study room, did you catch a glimpse of the boy everyone once called coryo.

the sun had set hours ago, cloaking the capitol in a darkness only deigned by the dead of night. when it’s this late, the university tends to fall silent; students have either gone home or to a party, leaving the resources at the school wide open for anyone who might wander through. you preferred to study in the library when everyone was gone, because it was the only place where you could focus. there was no noise, no talking, no pointless bickering amongst other students over grades or girlfriends. just you, and your books, and your notepad you loved to doodle in when your mind wandered from your assignments.

so it was a normal night for you, a lonesome one, where you entered the grand doors to the university library, met with the familiar darkness of the hall. the school turned the lights off after eight, and it was eleven. you were headed towards the back of the library with your truckload of textbooks, when you found one light on in the row of group study rooms. the yellow fluorescence spilled through the half-drawn curtains like honey, and you wondered who might be studying together so late? it was usually only you on nights like these. you detoured from your beeline to the single spaces to see who was still awake.

when your eyes fell upon the only other student still on campus, you had to fight the urge to exclaim in triumph- because you’d finally done it. you’d seen the real, human person that existed within stone-carved snow. coriolanus was craned over a myriad of study papers, scribbling equations over and over in a frantic fashion as his brows furrowed so tightly you began to fear his skin would tear. the boy had discarded his academy getup, red coat draped over the back of his chair and his blue button-down thrown sloppily across the table, leaving only his white undershirt left on him. you examined the broadness of his shoulders, which you’d failed to before; the t-shirt hugged him, clinging to the bulk of his arms and cascading down the front of his chest like a white flag. somehow, beneath the uniform, you’d never seen how buff coriolanus actually was, and you thought, well, he was a peacekeeper for a while. maybe he’s kept up with it. around his neck hung a tarnished pair of dog tags which you only assumed had to be his. a keepsake? a reminder? you couldn’t help but wonder.

the shirt and chain were nice informalities, but what did you in was his hair. you’d never recognized just how long it had gotten, since you’re so accustomed to the tightness of its placement; now, it seemed to spill over his ears like the sea foam that curls atop waves, and lapped at the back of his neck in long, soft-looking tufts. you felt heat rush to your cheeks at the messiness of it, and wondered why in the world he insisted on keeping it up when it looked so much prettier down.

the amount of time that passed between when you stumbled upon his study room and stared him down had no measure, but it was long enough for him to notice the shadow of a figure forming on the other side of the window. you watched anxiously as his head cocked, studying the darkness, and your body froze as his rose from the chair and walked to the door. the boy swung it open and the sterile light revealed you just behind the doorframe, doe-eyed and embarrassed. for a second, you thought his lip upturned, but you must have imagined it.

“what are you doing?” coriolanus asked.

“i-” you squeaked, and cleared your throat, “i always study late. what are you doing here?”

“you tell me, since you decided to spy.”

there was that coldness again. as long as you’d known him, he was never less frigid than his last name. you made a show of peeking through the window and replying, “well, it seems to me you’re studying alone in a group room. got nobody to tutor you, huh, coriolanus?”

coriolanus’ lips did not decieve you then, as they curled into a smile that was more chilling than warm. yet, something about it made you wish he’d do it more.

he took a moment to look at the sign on the door, recognizing the plaque designating the room for collective study. he rolled his eyes and muttered, “thoughtless.”

“you know, nobody’s here to tell you that you can’t study in there. it’s not like they’d deny you anything anyway,” you jabbed.

coriolanus’ intriguing grin faded. his opulent jaw tightened as he turned away and sat back down at the large desk where all his books and papers lay, deciding you were not worth a fight. you followed him inside.

“get out,” he groaned.

“it’s a group room, isn’t it?” you smirked, letting your book bag hit the floor with a loud thump! “what, can’t concentrate with me around?”

before he could impulsively agree, coriolanus reminded himself of his situation. so far, you’d violated every safe rule he had- he was half undressed, his hair was disheveled, and the trial and error of arithmetic on his pages proved exactly how many attempts it took to achieve those double zero exam scores you so greedily coveted. here, alone in this room with the only girl in class that didn’t follow his lead like a puppy, he was caught with his guard down. he hated it.

“do whatever you want, just don’t interrupt me.”

you couldn’t help the grin that tugged at your lips, because you didn’t have to interrupt him. just your presence was enough to throw him off course. you dug quietly through your backpack to fish out your notepad, your textbook for 21st century literature, and your math packet- the same one coriolanus was toiling over. the boy’s eyes kept flickering to you as you laid your belongings out on the table: a collection of graphite pencils, shaved to the nubs from drawing, a gray clay eraser molded to the shape of your fingers, and a sleek silver pen with your initials engraved on the cap. his eyes danced over the pen, admiring the slow curve of its body.

“what are you looking at?” you asked, voice barely above a whisper. you liked seeing him so distracted by you, so to chastise him would be overkill- it seemed your normalcy was enough.

coriolanus’ fair skin flushed a rosy pink as he looked up at you. he made himself sit up straight and replied, “nothing. just looking at that pen you have.”

you plucked the utensil from the spot you placed it and passed it over in your palm, tracing the tiny letters of your name. you held it out for him to take, and his eyes glinted with confusion. you held it out a little further, as if to say, it won’t bite. coriolanus flashed a hint of a smile before taking it, and for the first time, he looked his age. he was a college student, a barely broke one at that- you knew more about him than he thought- and the way he held that pure silver pen was like he’d wished for one all his life. his long, slender fingers handled the pen like a relic. you found yourself fixated on the way they moved- with so much intention, so much focus. so much care. and for that, you didn’t hint at a smile at all. you wanted to scream for even allowing yourself to show any display of happiness because of coriolanus snow, but you couldn’t control it. this disposition of his was so new that you didn’t know what to do with yourself. feeling a bit embarrassed, you decided maybe now was the time to tease him, as you so cleverly do often.

“never seen a pen before?”

“i- no, i have seen a pen before,” the boy’s shoulders tensed, but his grip on the pen didn’t. “this one is just… particularly nice.”

you felt a sudden pang of guilt, and you withdrew the urge to be nasty. “well, my father gave me a whole package of them. part of a stationary set. i have seven more. you could…”

“hm?” coriolanus looked from you to your pen, and you rolled your eyes.

“you could- you could keep it, if you wanted.”

you didn’t like the silence in the library now, even though that’s what you came here for. the way coriolanus leaned back in his chair, looking a bit smaller now than he used to, made you squirm in your seat.

“keep it? why?”

“well, because you seem to like it,” you pursed your lips.

“so you’d just give it away? to me, of all people?”

his words felt like a slap to the face. sure, you’d never shown him much grace, but did he really feel you hated him that much? did he think you were that mean? were you that mean?

“yeah,” you pouted just a bit, “i’d like for you to have it.”

coriolanus had never given you a reason to feel softness before. his attitude was so insurmountable all the time that you were always in competition with him, trying to prove you were just as smart, just as quick, just as deserving of praise for all the hard work you do. coriolanus was a formidable opponent, and you both knew that. but all this time you’d been wishing to see him screw up was starting to make you feel like crumbling to pieces, because how could you have wished that upon the boy who sits before you now? the boy who held your pen like a promise, and ogled at the way it wrote so smoothly on his page, and muttered a thank you that was so quiet you wondered if he’d said it at all?

“that’s very kind,” he tacked on.

“well, it’s nice to give sometimes,” you stated.

you both fell silent again, and coriolanus hunched over his work, using your- his- pen to take another crack at the problem he’s been stuck on for nearly forty minutes. you could almost see his brain compartmentalizing, removing you from the equation as he tried to ace the answer. you pretended to open your textbook and read some passage, but you watched him through your eyelashes. you watched as he licked his bottom lip in frustration, and you realized just what situation you’ve gotten yourself into: this was what you wanted. you wanted to catch coriolanus snow acting normal, like a real teenage boy- you’d prayed to see one score of 99 or one trip over his shoelace, and finally you have. coriolanus snow is sitting across the table from you in a t-shirt, with his hair tumbling across his forehead like fresh-spun white gold, struggling to figure out a math problem you had aced during the lesson hours ago. you wanted to help him, when all you’d ever hoped for was to taunt him for his fault- you imagined the day you could pick him apart a hundred times. but you had to help him.

you coughed quietly before reaching across the table to place a finger on the corner of his worksheet, catching his attention. he glanced up at you to see your eyebrows raised, and you asked, “can i?”

the boy nodded, and you slid the paper sideways so you could both see. coriolanus followed your nimble hand as you swiped your pencil across, carrying exponents and deviating with flourish. it wasn’t the first time he’d been impressed by your smarts, but it was the first time he’d seen your brilliance so closely. you didn’t know that he always found your brain so fascinating, because of how everything came to you with ease- you didn’t have to study as hard as he did, or at least he thought so. you just clicked when it came to school. he found that… beautiful, in a way. and he found you beautiful now, as you showed him the correct answer, smiling softly.

“did that make sense? did i explain it right?” you wondered aloud, and he blushed, realizing he hadn’t heard a word you said.

“oh- well, i… i zoned out a bit. i’m sorry.”

you chuckled. “want me to show you again?”

something low in coriolanus’ stomach bubbled, and before he thought of any possible consequences, he lied right to your face: “you know, i couldn’t see the paper very well. could you…?”

you didn’t notice his ploy, which sent a surge of relief through him. you got up and walked around the table, squatting beside his chair so the both of you could see the worksheet straight on. as you walked him through the equation again, he failed to listen to your words; instead, he listened to the slight tremor in your voice, the low timbre with which you spoke. you sounded gentle, which he wasn’t used to. and he inhaled the scent of you, which was as strong as always. he was partial to roses, yet his grandma’am’s roses didn’t have much scent. but he had always held a reservation for your perfume, for it smelled like something he hadn’t known before. it was warm and starchy, but sweet, and if only he could get a bit closer, he might be able to tell exactly what sweetness he recognized…

you had stopped talking, and you were looking at him with a ghostly expression, and he wondered for a moment what stopped you. and he kept twisting a lock of your hair around his finger, trying to figure it out. until he noticed he was feeling your hair.

“i- oh, i-” coriolanus withdrew his hand like you had a disease and scrunched his face up with shame, “i’m so sorry, i shouldn’t have…”

you leaned back on your heels and shook your head nervously. “no, i-it’s okay.”

“your hair is soft.”

“thank you.”

“…could i?” he muttered, lips barely parting as he reached his hand out again. it looked so big up close.

“sure.”

coriolanus took a little more liberty, carding his strong palm through your hair, dragging his fingers all the way from the roots to the ends. he watched it shine in the low light of the study room, and you gazed up at him like you’d never met him before- which, in theory, you haven’t. not this version of him. he handled you softly, tracing the curve of your shoulder with his pointer finger, and you though he might as well be carving your skin with a blade the way it stung. you shivered, and he smiled. not coldly. a real smile.

“you’re not like this,” you croaked. “you’re… you’re mean, and you always win.”

“i don’t always win,” he protested.

“yes you do. everyone either hates you or wishes they were you. you’re the future president, remember? everything goes your way.”

“you never let me win, do you?” he dared to play with your hair again as he continued, “always on my heels. getting the same exam scores, spitting out answers like it’s a contest. you never let me get the best of you like others do.”

“well, why should you get to have all the fun?” you rebutted.

coriolanus laughed, and it filled your lungs with butterflies. butterflies. because of coriolanus. are you dying?

“i know i’m… well, an ass. it’s how i succeed. but i’ve always liked your competition, you know. you keep me on my toes.”

“someone should.”

“you’re right.”

his arms were filling out those t-shirt sleeves so nicely, and you’d never realized just how handsome coriolanus was. not statue-handsome, but boyish. he was strong and broad, and he had a hand at the back of your neck, and suddenly your hands were shaking.

“i’ve always liked you, you know. i always thought you were pretty, like the actresses in those old movies from before the war,” he admitted. “and smart. smarter than me. smarter than everyone at this school.”

“really?”

“really.”

you swallowed thickly and reached behind your head, finding his knuckles and touching them with your fingertips. “i always thought i hated you. i don’t think i do. i think i just… don’t understand you.”

you stood up and sat on the edge of the table, crossing your arms over your chest. coriolanus had to pretend he didn’t love the way you curved behind your arms. you were in a university sweater, a cable-knit one, and your issued slacks were rolled up to reveal the old army boots on your feet. he wondered if they were a keepsake from your father, a dutiful peacekeeper, or if you had a home life like his.

“what don’t you understand?”

“everything. your luck. your smarts. your power. your looks.”

“my looks?”

you rolled your eyes, trying to hide your nerves. “y-yes, your looks. everyone knows you’re handsome, coriolanus. you’re presidentially handsome, like all our professors say.”

“do you agree with them?”

you could tell he was teasing now, but you had too much pride to let him win. like always. “no. i think you’re a different kind of handsome.”

“and what is that?”

“the kind that’s frustrating.”

“frustrating?”

“yes.”

coriolanus leaned back in his chair then, and you felt like he was presenting himself for you to judge exactly what was so frustrating. but you knew it was how he smiled, and held himself tall, and struck down his enemies without lifting a finger. he was intimidating, and you didn’t know how much you liked that.

the boy licked his lips again and said, “you’re different outside of classes, too, you know. more like… how i imagined you.”

“you imagine me?”

“you don’t imagine me?”

this was driving you insane. sitting before him, legs clamped shut, trying to convince yourself that he’s your enemy, and he’s evil, and he’s only ever given you trouble; that you could easily come to school the next day and tell everyone that coriolanus snow can’t solve complex derivatives. but you felt it in your gut that you wanted to teach him how to solve complex derivates, just like you ached to feel how his big hands felt anywhere besides your neck. and in those icy eyes, you saw the way he looked at you, like you were a paper with a 101 marked at the top. like he had wanted nothing more than he wanted you in that moment.

you uncrossed your arms as he rose from his seat, taking a step closer to you. he placed those hands on your hips and pushed you back, sliding you onto the table. your legs parted naturally, and he stood between them, refusing to move his touch. you gazed up into his defrosted eyes and smiled, and he smiled back.

it was a surprise when he asked, “can i kiss you?” because coriolanus didn’t seem like that kind of boy. he took what he wanted. but he didn’t take you; it seemed like he wanted to earn you.

you nodded softly. “yeah.”

his lips were on you before you had a chance to breathe, but you didn’t mind. he was slow, and his mouth was dangerously warm. his thumbs pressed into your hip bones, which gave you the urge to reach for something of his in return. you chose his hair, burying your hands in the slightly crunchy curls that unraveled from the gel. you brushed through them to soften them up, and he giggled against your mouth, sensing you’d been thinking of doing that for a while. when his hand found your neck again, he tugged at your hair a bit to tip your face back for better access. when you felt him pull you, you gasped against his lips, and everything came tumbling down.

“coryo,” you heaved.

his eyes grew dark at the sound of his nickname, which he hadn’t heard since he was at the academy. he didn’t even know you knew of it. but oh, he liked the way it sounded coming from you. so desperate.

“what was that?” he smirked, tugging at your hair again. not hard enough to hurt, but hard enough to make your legs twitch.

you pressed a kiss to the corner of his mouth, leaving a slight ring of saliva in your wake as you repeated it much softer. “coryo.”

“don’t ever call me coriolanus again. please.”

“kiss me again and i’ll forget your name altogether.”

he was everywhere. his hands roamed your sides as he kissed you again, taking his lips across your face and neck like you were the first meal he’s eaten in ages. you whined against this touch, feeling the pressure of his waist as your legs wrapped around him. you arched your back, attempting to roll your hips against his, bickering with his tongue; coryo’s calloused hands shoved beneath your sweater, bunching it up at his forearms as he kneaded the soft pudge of your stomach. you were leaving smudges of graphite on his porcelain skin from the worksheet, but you didn’t mind tainting his perfection just a tad. he could use a little smudging.

“please,” you asked kindly, nipping at his cheek, right by a smooth black stain.

“please what?”

“touch me, coryo.”

“how?” he paused. your hazy eyes caught his and saw apprehension, which only made you giggle.

“have you never…?”

“not, uh… not recently,” he blushed, and then retracted his lie. “not ever.”

you untangled from him, placing a gentle hand on his cheek. “s’okay. sit down.”

the boy listened, unsure of how he felt being ordered around. you made him pull the chair right up to the table, and you leaned across to kiss him again. you took the moment to press your hands to his chest, feeling the hard muscles he’d been hiding under that uniform for so long. he shuddered when you ran your hands from his shoulders down to his hands, and you laced your fingers with his. an intimate gesture for you both, but he liked it. he liked being close to you like this.

“so smart, but you don’t know how to touch a girl, huh, coryo?” you grinned, pressing a light kiss to his lips. he chased after you as you pulled away, wanting another, but you nudged him with your nose.

“i don’t know everything,” he gulped, “i mean, i have an idea, but i… yeah.”

“do you want to?”

“yes,” coryo pledged. “please.”

“i didn’t peg you as a learner.” you were nervous, but you wanted him more, so you leaned back and said, “i’ll show you what to do, okay?”

“okay.”

you slowly layed back on the table, and coryo reached for the button on your pants. his hands shook, and you thought to yourself, every flaw i’ve ever wanted to see, i’m seeing tonight, and it’s because of me. you giggled, and coryo chuckled back out of shyness. he fumbled with the button and was gentle with the fabric as he slid your slacks down. his eyes took in every inch of curve you’d been hiding under that godforsaken school uniform, and how your little black underwear cut into the chub of your waist. he knew you had enough to eat, and that made him happy.

your skin felt like fire in every place his hands grazed as he freed your legs, and you did your best to be encouraging as you took his hand in yours. you leaned back on one elbow and held his hand in the other, and the two of you shuddered as you pressed his palm flush to your warmth. you guided his fingers to the little bud of nerves resting at the top, and coriolanus’ mouth was already watering at the dampness of the fabric.

“do you feel that spot right there?” you asked, voice cracking. his fingers were so warm.

“yes,”

“i want you to rub it. don’t push too hard, and circle it with your fingers, okay?”

coriolanus looked into your glazed eyes and said, “you’ll tell me if i’m doing it wrong?” and when you nodded sweetly, he gave it a try.

you couldn’t bite your tongue as he began, because this couldn’t have been his first time. he had exactly the right pressure, and exactly the right pace, and his fingers molded to the shape of you so well that you saw stars. you let out a string of soft moans, and the boy reached his spare hand over the table to hold yours.

“good?” he inquired.

“mm,” you struggled to respond, “coryo, mhm.”

“i like how you say my name. i wish you’d called me that sooner. haven’t been called that in a long time, pretty,”

a drunken smile tugged at your lips as you half-teased half-praised, “coryo, coryo, coryo.”

he kept circling for a while, watching the way you struggled to breath through your nose as you kept quiet. a cocktail of obsession and need swirled in his stomach, and he knew this would be enough for you, but it wasn’t nearly enough for him. he wanted to be as close to you as possible, and feel your hands on his face- after feeling the delicateness of them as they intertwined with his, he had come to love your hands.

“this isn’t close enough,” he pulled his hand away, and you whined at the loss of contact. “can i try something else?”

“what do you want to-”

coriolanus made quick work of sliding your underwear down your legs and discarding of it on the chair next to his shirt. you watched as he dropped to his knees before you and smiled, taking his first look at everything you had to offer. he looked so hungry.

“do you even know what you’re doing?” you breathed.

“well, i know where it feels good, don’t i? do you trust me?”

you sat up a bit to get a better view. his messy blond hair falling into his eyes, and his hungry face staring up at you. coriolanus snow, on his knees. you thought you’d never see the day. you nodded in response.

taking your nod for approval, he licked his lips, and he made his move.

your hands flew to his hair as his tongue licked a fat stripe between your hips, flicking ever so slightly over your clit; he made a few of these before he plunged his tongue inside, giving you no warning but rewarding you with happy little groans into you. you mindlessly bucked your hips into his face as he got himself acquainted with you, unsure of how he was so good at this but in too much ecstasy to care.

“fuck, coryo, just like that,” you moaned, and he responded with a chuckle that sent shockwaves to your stomach. his heavy palms stopped pressing your thighs apart, allowing you to clamp them around his face, which only made him lick harder, and faster, and deeper.

“you taste like your perfume,” he raved as he came up for air, his chin slick with your arousal. “sweet, like something powdery,”

“may roses,” you wheezed, “my perfume smells like may roses, coryo,”

may roses, he thought. she smells like roses. my roses suck compared to this. he took one more whiff of the skin on your stomach, which flooded you with butterflies, and then he went back for more.

he was torturous then. he lapped at you like a dog, twisting and swirling his tongue around, aiming to touch every single spot inside of you that he hadn’t had the pleasure to yet. your gut felt tense as he ate you so carefully, yet the rest of your body was growing limp; your hands tied into his curls were the only things holding you up. coriolanus noticed you suffering and pressed both hands to your tummy, coaxing you to lay flat on the table. he stood over you then, pressing sweet little kisses all over your body up to your neck, leaving lip prints in a slick trail. the boy caught your lips again, and you moaned into his mouth, tasting yourself; coriolanus used the opportunity to go back to circling, using what you’d taught him like a good student.

“o-oh my god,” you groaned, burying your face into his neck, “jesus, coryo,”

“i’ve always wanted you like this. even when you pissed me off, i still liked you. i really like you.”

you felt like your brain was melting out of your ears at his touch, feeling him pressing against your heat just enough to make your body shake. “fuck, i more than like you now.”

coriolanus grinned darkly and decided to get a little playful. he kept his thumb pressed to your clit, and he pushed his two middle fingers inside of you, cooing at the wetness and warmth. you gasped, clawing hopelessly at his t-shirt as he curled them inside of you, following the cadence of your heartbeat, which was racing.

“good, hm?” he asked.

“coryo!” you cried, eyes clamping shut like you were in pain. but it wasn’t painful, not one bit.

he kept placing tantalizing kissed on your chest, right near your collarbones, as his fingers ebbed and flowed. your walls ached, your body limp, brain completely dumb on his fingers.

“look at you, sweetheart,” he teased, “can’t even speak.”

he watched you try to protest, but all that fell from your lips were unfinished phrases. it was only when your hands scraped down his back did he feel you tighten around his hand, and he trapped you there, fucking his fingers into you as hard as he possibly could.

“come on, darling. let it go.”

“c- cor-”

coriolanus interrupted your mindless babbling, pressing you one more time: “let yourself go for me. show me i did a good job, yeah?”

the way his voice growled as he asked such a needy question sent you tumbling over the edge. as his fingers were hitting you in just the right spot, you let out what was meant to be a scream but broke on the way up into a million lewd pieces; coriolanus collected you with one dizzyingly strong arm as you bucked your tired hips into his palm, chasing after your orgasm as he kept moving ever so slowly inside you, working you through it. he refused to stop kissing you, and left praise after praise stinging your skin as he pulled his fingers out. he admired the way they glistened and dripped with you, nearly collapsing under the weight of what he’d just done for the girl he’d been admiring for so long.

“i’ve been dreaming of that, y’know,” he nipped at your ear, and you twitched in his arms. you could barely speak, so he kept talking. he helped you sit up, and pulled your black panties back up your shaking legs, kissing your knees. “you were good, love. you did so good. i always wanted to make you feel good like that.”

you blinked through the haze, helping him by raising your hips a bit so he could cover you back up. you swallowed thickly, and when your vision cleared, you saw coriolanus smiling at you in a way he’d never smiled at anyone… with love in his eyes.

“you’re nice,” you were able to choke out. “nice to me.”

“i’m sorry i haven’t been before. i wanted to be.” you offered a dopey smile, and he followed up with, “not so quick to talk back when you’re fucked out, are you?”

you could only giggle into his neck, pressing embarrassed, swollen kisses to the vein that ran behind his ear. “mm-mmm,” you shook your head, trying to speak slowly so you didn’t stutter, “if you sit… i’ll re… i’ll repay the favor.”

“but you’re-”

“shh,” you cut the boy off, “m’gonna be nice to you now, coryo.”

so, coriolanus showed you yet again that he was capable of listening when he wanted to, and you taught him a lesson in what it’s like to be loved by someone who hates first- just like him.

coriolanus snow has a reputation, and for good reason. he needs to be strong so he can succeed. but behind closed doors, where he can let his hair down and show the hard work it takes for him to stay strong, you’ve come to learn that there’s more to the coriolanus snow everyone sees. his uncertainty, his frustration- that’s when he became coryo. and coryo is a learner, a lover, even in his most harsh and unlikable forms. but most importantly, he harbors devotion like an obsession, and there is nothing worth more devotion than you. not his country, not his family name, not even his math exam. only you.

#coriolanus snow #coriolanus x reader #coriolanus smut #coriolanus fanfiction #coriolanus x y/n #thg #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #smut #Spotify #pet names #coryo snow

[bless-my-demons]

Redamancy: Chapter Three

Jasper Hale x Reader

Series Summary: What happens when your soulmate is a vampire that struggles to maintain a diet of trying not to kill you? Common sense says run for the hills, nothing is worth your life - but my heart is whispering why not, what’s there to lose?

Warnings: None

Notes: So sorry last weekend’s chapter was late this week, I’m back to my regularly scheduled posting! I’m so excited so many of you like this series so far!!

Word Count: 1131

Series Masterlist

• January 25, 2005 • Forks High School •

Reader

My second day at Forks high school started much smoother than the first. It was pretty much uneventful until I decided to eat lunch alone outside on the picnic tables in the quad. It was an overcast day much like all the others and maybe a little chilly, but still decent enough since it wasn’t currently raining. It made for the perfect condition being that no one else really wanted to eat outside.

That is, until I spotted none other than Jasper Hale headed in my direction.

“Mind if I join you?” He asks, pointing to the opposite end of the table I’m currently occupying.

“Not at all.” I respond, idly tidying my area self consciously.

“Sorry, sometimes it’s a little overwhelming inside and I come out here to get away.” He says by way of explanation, laying down the sketch pad he carried with him along with a few pencils and a smudge stick. “Mostly I just come out here to draw uninterrupted.” He sits and flips to an empty page, tilting it a little away from my view.

“I get it, large crowds aren’t my thing either. Plus in the two days I’ve known Emmett I can already tell that he probably creates a hostile drawing environment.” I finish with a light chuckle, turning my attention toward the unfinished apple in my hand.

“You draw too?” He asks, eyebrows lifting as he begins a rough sketch on the blank paper.

“Oh heck no, I don’t have any artistic abilities like that, as much as I wish I did.” I frown, taking a bite of my apple.

“I didn’t think I had it in me either, but I took some classes, watched some videos online, and doodled around a lot. Finally got the hang of it although I still don’t really think I’m that good.” He trails off, concentrating on his pencil strokes. “It helps with the stress though, especially when there’s a lot going on.”

“That is… actually kind of neat. Having an outlet that’s also inspiring, creating art and it centering you in the process.” I muse out loud, watching a face beginning to take shape on his paper.

I’m about to ask who he’s drawing when the bell signaling the end of lunch rings out in the empty air surrounding us. I gather my trash and stand while he tucks his supplies away.

“Thanks for keeping me company today.” I tell him as I gaze into his beautifully golden eyes, not quite ready to part ways with him.

“Thanks for allowing me to disturb your peace and quiet.” And as if reading my mind, “Mind if I walk you to your next class?”

“Oh um, sure.” Trying not to seem too excited by the proposition of spending more time in this gorgeous boy’s presence. I tuck some loose strands of hair behind my ear and walk towards him.

“Lead the way, darlin’.” He announces, sweeping his arm in the direction of the main school building, a smirk on his lips.

I laugh and shake my head at his antics, a blush creeping up my cheeks as I walk past him in the direction of my economics class.

Ditching my trash in the trash can as we leave the quad, I miss the way he grins at the accomplishment of making me giggle. I also fail to notice the astounded looks of his adopted siblings as we pass them unaware of their presence through the windows of the cafeteria. Faces reflecting their shocked thoughts at seeing their brother openly flirting with a female compared to his normal stoic facade.

“How did you do it?” Emmett asks, leaning against the locker next to mine.

“Could you be a little more specific?” I ask, a little confused by his blunt question.

“You’ve been here less than a week and my brother is wrapped around your little finger.” He says, holding up his pinky to wiggle in my face.

I laugh and shut my locker, “Emmett, I’ve had all of like two interactions with Jasper, you’re looking into this a little too much.”

“He usually keeps to himself, this isn't the normal Jasper we’re talking about.” He falls into step slightly behind me on my way to the last class of the day, his large build not moving through the throng of students as quickly as I am.

I turn to look at my new friend, “I literally have no clue, it’s probably nothing Em!” My heart picking up speed at just the thought of Jasper. Is he actually interested in me? Is that what Emmett is getting at?

There’s no way, beautiful people like him don’t go for people like me.

I turn and leave Emmett behind in the hallway as students finish rushing through the halls, the tardy bell ringing.

American History, the class I share with Jasper Hale and it also happens to be the last class of the day. Unfortunately though, his assigned seat is on the other side of the room. At least it’s more forward than mine, leaving me to observe him for most of the class period without him seeing.

History is also my worst subject; whether it’s world or US history, I hate it all the same. So many mistakes and atrocities, I wish I could let it flow in one ear and out the other without having to remember it for tests.

Today though, I get the sense our teacher has had a difficult day since he’s decided to let us work together freely. Seeing as I don’t really know anyone yet, I’m forced to work alone.

As if he could feel my discomfort and irritation with the assignment, Jasper Hale appears at the edge of my peripheral vision, claiming the abandoned desk next to mine and turning a few heads of our classmates.

“You’re thinking so loud I could practically hear it from across the room.” He mutters lowly without looking up from his worksheet.

“I’m thinking too loud?” I respond defensively as I cut him a look that would normally skin boys alive.

“Would you like some help or not, doll?” He asks, a grin sliding across his lips as his eyes meet mine in challenge.

“I-uh, I hate history.” I manage to blurt out, a little flustered that he so easily bypassed my frustrated facade without a blink.

“I do want that explanation eventually, but we have work to finish and only,” He breaks eye contact to glance at the clock above the board, “thirty seven minutes left before you’re on your own.”

“Alright Hale, what did you get for number four?” I deflate and accept his offer to save me from the misery of suffering through this stupid assignment alone.

Next

#jasper hale #jasper hale x reader #jasper whitlock hale #twilight fanfiction #twilight #jasper hale fanfiction #jasper whitlock #bless-my-demons #redamancy series #slow burn #female reader insert

[beefybuckrrito]

Study Session

Eddie asks you to help him study.

Pairing: Eddie Munson x fem!reader (any race)

Word count: 4.8k (I got a little carried away oopsie)

Warnings: 18+ minors DNI, reader is 18+, pet names (princess), bit o nipple play, biting (not too hard), fingering, handjob, unprotected p in v sex, a little of my D&D dorkiness sneaking out hehe

Author’s note: It took the beautiful doe-eyed soft fluffy boy making my heart explode to kick my ass back into writing! And thanks to him I already have another Eddie fic halfway done wink wink. No spoilers for ST4! Biggest shoutout to my irl bestie @tincanfics for hyping me up and also @mjolnir-steve for beta-ing! I am in love with Eddie Munson and there is no cure. Please consider sharing and commenting if you enjoy this!

You maneuvered through the sea of bodies to slip into the back door of your English class, a slow breath easing out of your chest as you settled into your seat. This was it, your last year of high school. While people were already boasting about the colleges they would be applying to or their grand gap year plans, you were just relieved to be done. The school work came easy enough, it wasn’t hard to study when you didn’t have anyone to be hanging out with. Your family moving to Hawkins your junior year pulled you from your old friends and pushed you into a situation where everyone had found their cliques the years prior, so you spent your time studying or walking through the woods of the small town with your walkman fastened to your hip. 

The screech of chalk on the board pulled you from your thoughts and once you realized you hadn’t missed anything important, you scanned the room for who you would be seeing first period every day. Familiar faces seemed to surround you, until you looked straight across the room to someone sneaking in after the bell and into the softest brown eyes you had ever seen. You immediately dropped your head to hide your face, cheeks growing hot from catching the gaze of possibly the most beautiful person in existence. Sure, you had seen the fluffy-haired metalhead in the hallways or standing on the occasional table in the cafeteria, but this was different. He was looking back at you this time. Heart hammering against your ribcage, curiosity got the best of you as you flicked your eyes back in that direction, only to get caught again. This time, you waited long enough to gauge his reaction, and you could’ve passed out seeing the smirk that tugged at the corner of his mouth and two ringed fingers raising off the desk in greeting. Refusing to let your nerves win this time, you offered a small wave back before turning your attention to the teacher. 

It became routine for you to start your day with English class, offering a small smile and wave across the room at the boy you quickly learned was named Eddie, and he returned the gesture in kind. The more comfortable you got, the more often your gaze danced over his features as he tried to pay attention to the lesson. You liked how his fingers drummed on the desk when he was bored, the sunlight sometimes catching the chunky silver pieces just right. You wondered how they would feel on your skin. His fluffy curls swayed whenever he would lean back in his chair to stretch, and it took all of your willpower to not notice how his tee would ride up and you could see the pale skin of his belly. He would wrinkle his nose at lines he didn’t like or found particularly complex, and you just wanted to plant the smallest kiss right on the tip of it. Studying for school was a chore, but you could study Eddie Munson all day. Somehow, your notetaking didn’t falter, though you were sure it would when you caught yourself doodling the Hellfire Club logo that was on his shirt. 

Eddie thanked whatever merciful power sent him a reason to want to go to English class first period. Not that he was paying as much attention, but showing up everyday instead of skipping had to help keep him on the path to graduating for real this year, right? It was time he got it together and actually wrapped up his time at Hawkins High. Maybe the band could get more gigs if he and the guys had time to travel. He was just determined to be done this time around. What he thought was going to be the most painful part of his day immediately turned around when he caught the eye of the cutest girl he had ever seen on the first day of school.

It had been a few weeks of the little back and forth with Eddie. You would smile and silently greet each other every morning from across the room and steal glances when you thought the other wasn’t looking. Almost like a game, the two of you would try to take everything in about the other while still keeping a single thread of focus on the topic for the day. You were much more successful than Eddie when it came to this. The first pop quiz handed back stared up at him with an F. He frantically looked over to you and caught the A on the top of yours as you tucked it into your folder. If he needed a sign to approach you, this was it.

-

You had dropped your chemistry textbook into your locker and closed the door, only to find the shaggy haired beauty from your English class on the other side, causing you to yelp in surprise. 

“Sorry to scare you, princess!” Eddie briefly looked mortified as his cheeks tinged pink, then he took a breath and offered his hand out. “I’m Eddie.”

“O-oh, it’s okay. Sorry to scare you back.” You shyly smiled at the nickname and gently fit your hand into his as you gave him your name. “It’s nice to officially meet you.” You didn’t realize you were still holding his hand as you got lost peering into his round eyes again.

“Yeah, you too.” Eddie gently squeezed your hand again before reluctantly letting go. Why was it so easy to flirt with you across the room, but now right in front of you, he felt even dumber than his grades showed? “Listen, I was wondering..” He chewed on his bottom lip for a moment and broke your gaze to study the blank outside of your locker. “Would you maybe want to study together sometime? You look like you have a way better handle on O’Donnell’s class than I do. And it would be cool to hang out, you know?”

You held your breath as he spoke. While you were a little disappointed he wasn’t asking you out, you were also relieved at not having to muster up the courage to go on a proper date. Hanging out sounded good. 

“That sounds good. Yeah. I can help you out.” You nodded, desperately trying to keep your nerves at bay. “Hanging out would be cool, too.”

Eddie beamed at you, ecstatic at getting the chance to spend more time with you and hopefully getting his grades straightened out. “I have Hellfire tonight. How about tomorrow, my place? Just me and my uncle and he works nights, so it would be nice and quiet.”

“Sure, that sounds good.” You were staring at him again, lost in the lines around his smile that made him look extra endearing to you. The bell for next class brought your attention back. “I can meet you in the parking lot tomorrow after school.”

You couldn’t help yourself in dressing a little cuter the next day. You didn’t want to be obvious or anything, but a little more makeup and jeans with your favorite top gave you the confidence to go through your day and have you fighting to not skip your way to the parking lot after your last class.

“Hey, princess!” Eddie called to you from where he was leaning against his van, waving once he caught your eye. 

He chewed at his bottom lip, watching as you approached. You seemed even more chipper than usual. Were you as excited as he was for this? He wasn’t sure about that, though the thought made his heart race a little. You looked extra good today, from your bright smile all the way down to your jeans that hugged your thighs so nicely. He quickly snapped himself out of those thoughts and made his way over to the passenger side to open the door for you, dramatically bowing and gesturing for you to take a seat. “My lady, your chariot to the land of studying awaits.”

You giggled as you thanked him and climbed into the van. The ride to his place went by smoothly as he told you all about the current campaign he was running with Hellfire. The way he animatedly spoke and gestured with his hands as he drove was so engaging, his passion pulling you in more by the second. 

Eddie was thrilled to tell you everything about Dungeons and Dragons and the storyline he had crafted. No one ever asked him about the game, and he loved the way you were watching him as he spoke. You seemed genuinely interested in him, or at least what he was saying. He gradually quieted down as he pulled into the trailer park, suddenly nervous about what you would think about it.

“So, do you think they’ll be able to survive Vecna?” You seemed unphased at the surroundings as you collected your bag off the floor. “It sounds like you’re giving those kids a real run for their money.”

Eddie did a double take at you not casting a judgemental look toward the trailer. He rarely had anyone over, never mind a pretty girl who was smart and seemed to like talking to him. “We’ll have to see if their plan will work. It seems pretty risky, but I think they have a chance at pulling it off.” He hopped out of the driver’s side and dashed over to your door, making sure to open it with as much flourish as he did the first time before leading you to the front door. “It’s not much, but it’s home.” He mumbled as he ushered you into the living room. He fidgeted with his rings as he watched you take in your surroundings.

“I like the hat collection.” You warmly smiled at him, trying to calm the anxious expression on his face.

“Thanks. It’s a thing my uncle and I have been doing for years.” He shuffled his feet a little but perked up at your smile. “Wanna head to my room? I mean, to start studying.” His cheeks felt warm again as he gestured down the hall.

“Lead the way, kind sir.” You softly giggled as he was clearly caught off guard by your own nickname for him. Following him into the room at the back of the trailer, you were in awe of the space completely decked out in band posters, your eyes falling to a glossy black and red guitar hanging in the center of the wall. The air was warm and smelled of a heady combination of his cologne and the weed he was no doubt stashing somewhere. It suited him perfectly. 

“She’s a beaut, huh?” Eddie gently touched his fingers to the instrument. He was relieved you weren’t seemingly off put by anything and possibly intrigued by his interests. He was not used to this. 

“Can I hear you play sometime?” You turned to him, the hopeful expression on your face making his chest tighten. 

“I’m not really sure you’ll be into the stuff I play, princess.” He chuckled and gestured to the various metal band memorabilia around the room, “But you can if you really want.”

“I would like that very much.” You were buzzing with excitement. The prospect of getting to see him outside of school again putting an additional pep in your step. School. Right. You were supposed to be helping him with English, too. “So, did you want to get started on the homework?”

-

You read passionately as you lay across the foot of Eddie’s bed on your belly, casually rolling a few dice in your palm.

“Your hand, your tongue: look like the innocent flower,

But be the serpent under't. He that's coming

Must be provided for: and you shall put

This night's great business into my dispatch;

Which shall to all our nights and days to come

Give solely sovereign sway and masterdom”

Eddie watched you in awe, his eyes constantly flickering back and forth between the curves of your legs and the motion of your fingers caressing his game pieces. “You sure make a convincing murderous lady.” He grins at you as you roll on your side to face him. 

“I hope that doesn’t scare you away…” You took a risk and winked at him, taking great satisfaction in the surprised look on his face. Like in class, the two of you had taken to stealing glances while the other was busy reading, although this time you seemed to be catching each other constantly. You felt more comfortable the more you read back and forth.

To his credit, Eddie threw on a cheesy suave look and leaned toward you, plucking a d20 out of your hand. “Not at all, dearest partner of greatness.”

Your breath caught in your throat at the proximity, his weight shifting on the bed only moving you closer to him. So easily you reverted back to your favorite activity, studying Eddie Munson. His fluffy hair was tousled from rolling around the mattress as he dramatically read his lines, his big brown eyes looking even darker from the size of his pupils, he was an absolute sight to behold.  

Eddie could feel his ears burning beneath his curls from the way you looked at him, almost like you were in awe. He was used to people looking at him, but more like a performer at a freakshow or an animal in a cage. You looked at him like he was a work of art. It made him excited and nervous all at once. Did you really want him? His gaze dropped to your lips then quickly returned to your eyes, silently asking for permission.

A fresh wave of confidence soared through you as the usually boisterous metalhead softened right before your eyes, a look of almost pleading on his face the closer you became. You wanted to close the distance so badly, ever since you saw him on the first day of class, but you also enjoyed the little games you played together. You wanted him to feel in his element. “Roll for it.”

“What?” Eddie leaned back slightly, a brief look of confusion across his pretty face before you toyed with the die in his hand.

“You heard me, Mister Dungeon Master. Roll. To. Kiss. Me.” You leaned forward and softly bumped his nose with yours.

Eddie groaned, your words going right to his heart and crotch. “Damn, princess. Almost as ruthless as Lady Macbeth.” He carefully pushed your closed books together, giving him a flat surface to work with. He rolled the die around in his hand, praying to a god he didn’t believe in as he watched you bite your lip and smile at him. He slowly exhaled and released the die, watching as it bounced atop the books, the hollow sound ringing in his ears along with his heartbeat. 

The two of you held your breaths as the piece spun, trying so desperately to will a high number in your heads. Both wanting it so badly…

And he rolled a damn 10. 

Eddie went wide-eyed, a panicked look twisting his features as he frantically looked back and forth between you and the d20 that betrayed him. “I- Can, can I reroll? Please?”

“No.” Your voice was level, almost casual as you leaned forward to inspect the low roll further. “However, I’ll consider it a partial success. You can kiss me anywhere except on the lips.” You smirked at him, goosebumps spreading across your body as you watched his breathing pick up. 

Eddie was stunned. How was the cute, quiet girl that he borderline drooled over in class teasing him like this? He never wanted it to stop. “As you wish, my lady.” He gently cupped the back of your head and leaned in, his nose bumping yours again. The soft gasp that fell from your lips only spurred on his returned teasing as his fingers ghosted over your goosebumps. He ran the tip of his nose across your cheek, watching as your eyes fluttered closed. The hum you emitted as he pressed a chaste kiss to your cheekbone made the front of his jeans tighten. You made such pretty sounds, and he wasn’t anywhere near done hearing them. 

The way he teased you was already setting you on fire, his gentle touches and the softness of his lips on your skin driving you crazy. You slid a hand up his arm and pushed your fingers through his fluffy curls, needing to touch him in some way. You pulled back slightly, only to look at him and see a reflection of just how needy you were. “Eddie…” 

He moaned hearing you say his name and dipped his head down to start peppering your jaw and the side of your neck with more kisses. He slid his other arm beneath you and pulled you closer to him, cradling you in his arms. “Is this okay?”

“Yes, please.” You softly cooed into the crown of his head, inhaling the mouth-watering scent of his shampoo. You writhed under his touch, pressing your bodies closer together and tugging at the hair you still had in your grasp. The vibration of his next moan had you squeezing your thighs together. The tension lingering between you all evening and finally getting the touch you needed was everything.

Eddie kissed and licked down to your collarbone, trying to nudge his way under the neckline of your top. He released the gentle grip he had on the back of your neck and rested his hand on your hip, massaging your curves through your jeans as he slipped his thumb under your shirt to touch the soft skin of your belly. “You’re so pretty, princess.” The way your back arched beneath his touch gave him the confidence to slide his hand further up, gripping the flesh of your waist. 

“You can see more of me if you want.” You gasped, feeling his teeth nipping at your shoulder. “Please, Eddie. Can I see you, too?” Releasing his curls, you gently tugged at the bottom of his shirt. 

“Yes! Absolutely, yes.” Eddie was quick to sit up onto his knees and yank his shirt off over his head, tossing it somewhere across the room. He met your eyes briefly, momentarily speechless seeing how blown your pupils were, before he saw you hungrily take in his exposed torso. 

You sat up to match him and immediately dove in to cover his neck and chest with kisses and gentle bites, pleasantly mewling at the taste of his skin. You flicked your tongue against his nipple and hummed in delight at his sharp intake of breath. It seemed impossible, you being there with the wild boy who caught your attention from a distance a year ago, so you were going to make the most of it. You kissed across his chest and down his arms, leaving kitten licks beside each tattoo before you reached his fingers. You collected his large hands in yours and toyed with his rings for a moment, before pressing a kiss to each fingertip.

Eddie felt like he was in a daze watching you, each movement and kiss lifting him higher into the haziness of his arousal. He couldn’t believe a sweet thing like you would actually give him the time of day, but here you were borderline sucking on his fingers and making eyes at him. He needed you. Resting his hands on your hips at first, he collected the fabric of your shirt and slowly pulled it over your head, like he was unwrapping a delicate present. He let the article fall to the bed beside him as he took you in: kneeling on his bed in your bra, wet marks from his kisses across your neck, your eyes glazed over in lust, biting your bottom lip while giving him a shy smile as you reached back to unclasp your bra. He was done for. 

The way Eddie was so perfectly following your instruction was driving you both insane. He tackled you back onto the mattress, covering your face with kisses, daring to get as close to the corners of your smile as possible still without touching your lips as you laughed. You both managed to undo each other’s jeans and slide them down your legs, taking a moment to process the sights before you. Hands roaming everywhere, you gently bit his shoulder as his fingers traced over the wetness of your panties, you cradling his balls and firm erection through his boxers. He laid open-mouthed kisses down your sternum and kneaded your breasts with his free hand, loving how you squealed when he would pinch a nipple. 

He was painfully hard at this point, and all of your caressing and perfect squeezing further drove him to pleasure. He wanted so badly to be inside you, but he needed to feel you first. He chuckled at the pout you gave him as he retracted his hand from between your thighs. “I promise you’ll like what I’m going to do, princess.” He slid his hand beneath the waistband of your panties and swirled a finger around your already swollen clit. “You’re soaked for me, huh? You want more?” He teased as his fingertips lazily stroked through your slick folds. 

“Please. Yes, please, Eddie.” You whined and swiveled your hips. Your back arched off the bed as he pressed a long digit into you, satisfying you in a way you had been craving for weeks. You dipped your hand into the band of his boxers and wrapped your fingers around his length the best you could, slowly stroking the silky skin. He had you so worked up, he easily slipped a second finger inside you. “More, please. Wanna feel your rings.”

“Oh, fuck.” Eddie was losing himself in your touch and deliciously needy sounds. He pressed his two fingers deeper, just enough to have his bulky rings nudging your entrance. His pace continued to be torturously slow, his fingers filling you repeatedly to the hilt of his rings as he watched you alternate between closing your eyes in bliss and looking up at him when you gave him a firm stroke. 

You would be lost in taking in every little expression Eddie made if he wasn’t making you so lost in pleasure. His fingers curled inside you perfectly, your back further arching off the bed as you neared your climax. His mouth was hanging slack as you continued to stroke him, his lips puffy from dragging them down your body. He looked perfectly debauched. You gasped when he rubbed his thumb against your clit with both fingers pressed deep inside you. Your hips bucked against his hand, and you started to stroke his cock faster. “Eddie, I’m… I-oh!” Your orgasm washed you in absolute pleasure as you clenched around his fingers, the motion of his thumb prolonging your release. 

“There you go, princess. Keep coming for me. So pretty. So, so pretty.” He egged you on, feeling such pride in making you tremble the way you did. His cock throbbed in your hand, desperate for release at this point, but he couldn’t stop playing with your sweet pussy and watching you writhe for him. 

You used your free hand to weakly grasp at his wrist, stilling his movement. “So good. So sensitive. Just a second.” You giggled as you guided his fingers out of you, humming at the feeling. Propping yourself up on your elbow, you continued to stroke him, running your thumb through the precum dripping from the tip. Once you felt ready, you laid back down and beckoned him toward you, spreading your knees as he climbed between them.  “Are you ready, Eddie?” You bumped the tip of your noses together again.

“Hell yes,” Eddie lowly whispered, his breath fanning over your face as he leaned forward to press a kiss to your forehead. "Are you ready, princess?" He sat back and slowly stroked himself, rubbing the nearly purple head through your wetness. 

"Mhm.." You nodded up at him, wiggling your hips to invite him to fill you up. "Need you, Eds." 

Eddie exhaled a shaky breath, his heart pounding in his chest and ears at the reality of where he was. He moaned as he slowly pushed into you, his forehead falling to rest atop of yours when he filled you completely. He stilled for a moment, for you to adjust to him and even more so for him to not finish the second he slid into your slick heat. "Oh, fuck, I'm inside you, princess. You feel so perfect." He mumbled into your forehead and kissed it again before pulling back to look at you.

The stretch of Eddie filling you was overwhelming in the best way possible. You grabbed his shoulder, your nails digging into his skin. "So full. Oh, my god. Please move. I need it." 

He pulled almost completely out before slowly sliding all the way back in, already losing himself to how good you felt around him. He pushed himself up onto his hands that rested on either side of your head to watch you as he picked up his pace. He was hypnotized by how your body moved under him; the way your breasts jiggled with each  thrust, your legs wrapping around his waist and pulling him further into you, and how you reached above yourself to grasp his wrists. The room was filled with sounds of your combined moans and the slapping of skin, something neither of you could get enough of in that moment. Eddie almost came as you sat up and started kissing and sucking at the tattoos on his forearms. “Jesus, princess. You’re gonna make me cum if you keep doin’ that.”

Your body was thrumming with pleasure, being filled so perfectly and surrounded by everything Eddie Munson. He looked so fucked out and wild on top of you, his hair bouncing with his thrusts and his beautiful eyes locked on you. You wanted to make him come, bring him the same pleasure he already brought you so easily and was going to again. You leaned forward and bit at the tattoo on his chest, your tongue laving at the expanse of skin between your teeth. He shouted and his thrusts picked up, absolutely pounding into you now. A mewl from you was muffled against his chest. With a ‘pop’ you released his pec and kissed up his neck, “C’mon, Eddie. Make me cum again, then finish inside me.”

“Oh, god.” Eddie was gritting his teeth at this point, determined to make you hit your peak again before he did. He slid a hand down your body, rolling a nipple between his fingers before settling his hand on your pubic bone, his thumb quickly circling over your clit. He was losing his pace, every kiss and bite you pressed to his skin was pushing him closer and closer. “Let me hear you. Let me hear those pretty noises, and come for me again.” He changed the motion of his thumb and nearly roared as you keened beneath him.

“Yes, yes, yes. Oh, fuck, yes, Eddie!” You buried your face into his chest as your orgasm came crashing down on you. Your entire body felt like it was on fire, flames lapping at you with each pulse of your release around him. “Please fill me up. Please!” You lifted your eyes to look at him, needing to see him come apart.

“Holy shit. I’m gonna cum, I-” Eddie thrust deep inside once more before spilling his release inside of you. The remaining clenching from your pussy leaving him with nothing but to give the smallest thrusts as he finished. He dropped to his elbows, his hair falling over his shoulders and caging your faces together for a moment. He rested his forehead against yours again as you both tried to regain your breath. 

When his heart rate finally slowed, he reluctantly pulled out of you and rolled onto his back, arms open and inviting you to lay with him. He hummed contently as you snuggled into his side, your head resting on his chest. This felt so right. 

After a few minutes of comfortable silence between, you suddenly shifted and reached under your side, piquing Eddie’s interest. You grinned up at him as you produced the d20 from earlier. “I think you should roll again.”

Eddie chuckled and plucked the die from your hand. “I guess I can’t really complain about my results from the last one.” Flashing you a cheeky smile, he rolled it in his hands for a moment before dropping it down the curve of your hip. He sat up a little to peer at it sitting on the bed between you, a 20 sitting at the top. 

You both cheered and grabbed at each other's face, peering into the other’s eyes before finally closing the distance and pressing your lips together.

Taglist: @barnesafterglow @sweetdreamsbuck @bucky-bucky-bucky-bucky @christywantspizza @midnightf @justile @late-to-the-party-81 @moonlacebeam

#iva writes #eddie munson smut #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson fic #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson x fem!reader #eddie munson x fem reader #joseph quinn character #stranger things fic

[lamentationsofalonelypotato]

You Call It Madness But I Call It Love

Chapter 12: My Heart Is Beating For You Constantly

Pairing: Soldier Boy x f!reader, Reader POV

Summary: When the reader left Payback 40 years ago after a falling out with her childhood best friend she never looked back, but when two men show up to her apartment and start asking her questions about the past, the reader begins to think those things can’t stay hidden and starts to question what’s real and what’s fantasy.  This is a re-telling of The Boys Season 3, where the reader is a supe who's known Soldier Boy since 1927. The chapters will fluctuate between past and present. This is chapter twelve of my "You Call It Madness But I Call It Love" series. (I'm so bad at summaries please forgive me!)

Word Count: 9.1K (I got really carried away)

Warnings: I'm going to label this one 18+ just in case. References to sex, Implied Sex, Heavy Making Out (not really explicit, but also not real un-detailed…), Cursing, Drinking, Soldier Boy might be, is, really, absolutely, a little OOC, Soft Soldier Boy, Angst, Fluff.

Note: This is told from Reader's perspective. Any references to the reader is made using you or your. There is minimal use of y/n. I tried my best to proofread, but nobody's perfect. Reader is described as "curvy" occasionally. If you don’t like, don’t read, but if you do like, you’re my favorite!

Internal Monologue is in first person and is in italics

A/N: The song they dance to is "You Call It Madness, But I Call It Love" by Russ Columbo.

Series Masterlist

Masterlist

**************************************

1984

You take a sip of wine, leaning over your coffee table to pull another photo from the Rosewood box perched on the edge. It's your birthday, your 65th birthday to be exact, of course one look in the mirror revealed that you barely looked over 30. To some women that might be a welcome thought, but given your current situation it wasn't.

It marked the fourth year since you told Ben that you were unhappy on Payback and as a supe, told him that you wanted a normal life, and four years after you'd let him talk you into staying. But this was the year. You were going to tell him that you were done, that you were moving on and getting out.

Unfortunately the only person you had to convince about letting go was yourself, because leaving meant giving up Ben. And you weren't sure that was something you could do.  You were having a hard time convincing your heart to let go of him or rather the old version of him, that only made it's appearance when it was the two of you. The memories that tied you to Ben were tight and difficult to unravel. You couldn't imagine your life without him, couldn’t see past this moment in your life.

But that's why you had to go. You knew you were in too deep. Fantasizing about a  relationship with someone who would never love you the same way you loved them, hoping in something that would never happen. And you needed to let him go, whether it be the new version of him or the boy you used to know, you needed to let Ben go.

The Rosewood box was filled with photos, old doodles, memories, and objects from your past. Usually it was stored under your bed, but tonight you had dragged it out into the living room to reminisce on your birthday. It was a tradition you started a few years ago as a way of remembering the past. Sometimes it was a welcome distraction from the way things were now and tonight you were letting it be a last supper of sorts, to indulge in the memories Ben and you had shared over the years before you told him that you were leaving.

You had no idea where you were going, but the thought excited you a little bit. Finally striking out on your own for the first time, doing something for yourself for once, it felt right.

Leaving Ben was the only thing that felt wrong. You wanted him to come with you, for him to choose you the way that you chose him that night, but you knew he wouldn't. He liked this life too much to let it go, he thrived in the spotlight, embraced everything about being a supe that you hated, and so you would let him go.

You look down at the strip of paper in your hand. It was a collection of photos from a photo booth, yellowed with age, but lined up one by one from the first baseball game Ben ever took you to, one of your favorite memories from your childhood. You were wearing the ridiculous pinstriped hat and Ben looked as handsome as he always did, smiling wide with his dark hair hanging in his face. It was hard to look at it now, hard to look at Ben and you when you were so young, and you didn't know where your lives were going to go.

Your eyes drift to the velvet case pressed into the corner of the wooden box. You had kept the ring that Howard got you, well, technically you had tried to give it back but he refused, begging you to reconsider.

Sometimes you thought about throwing it away. It was ugly, but it was a reminder. Not a reminder of Howard, you could barely remember what he looked like, but it was a reminder of the night Ben asked you to come with him. You could remember the earnest look in his eyes, how he cupped your face, and the promise he made to you. The future he promised had been filled with so much possibility, but you weren’t sure anymore. You think about the years you'd spent together and how leaving felt like the end of an era.

But it was necessary, breaking away from all of this would be good. Yes you would miss Ben, but you needed to move on. You knew that deep down. Because you wanted something more than all of this, and the night Ben asked you to come with him you thought he could give it to you, but after all these years you understood that he couldn’t and that he didn’t want to.

Someone knocks loudly on your door.

“One second.” You take the last sip of wine before standing and crossing the room to open the door. “Hey what are you doing here?”

Ben is standing in the hallway outside your apartment, looking handsome as always. He's wearing a tailored dark suit with a black tie, his hair is combed back from his face, dark stubble graces his rugged jaw and a wide smile pulls up at the ends of his lips that makes it very hard to focus on anything else. “Happy Birthday Sweetheart.” 

“I’ve had too many birthdays.” You laugh and wave a hand to brush it off. “What are you doing here, I thought you had an interview about the premiere tomorrow?”

Tomorrow night was the premiere of the third and final installment of Anti-Communist films that Ben was currently staring in. The first two had been utterly ridiculous and you knew that the one tomorrow would be just as pointless. Which you knew for a fact, because one day Ben asked you to meet him on set and you saw a scene he was filming, not to mention one time he tried to get you to run lines with him and you told him you'd rather drop dead than read Countess' lines, who took the co-star role when you refused. Ben’s offer of the co-starring role to you had been his way of appeasing you after you told him you were unhappy. When you refused, Countess had been more than willing to slide into it.  Who was still trying her upmost to get into Ben's pants, but he still completely ignored her, which gave you an unmeasurable amount of joy.

“I told them that I couldn’t miss my girl's birthday.” Ben smiles wider. “Plus I’d much rather spend tonight with you than those fucking vultures and I’ve never missed your birthday.”

Instead of the words "my girl" filling you with happiness as they had the first night Ben said it in the dancehall, they only make you frustrated. He had called you that several times over the years you'd been friends and each time it made you more and more angry. You were tired of it. Tired of Ben acting like Ben only when it was the two of you. Tired of Ben acting like he cared and like he wanted to be more than friends only to crush you the next day. Tired that he called you “my girl” and then did nothing that meant more than friends.  You loved him more than you’d loved anyone ever, took care of him, did everything you could for him, and each time when he didn’t acknowledge it, you felt like you weren’t enough. It made you feel like a kid again when you tried your upmost to please your mother only to have her be disappointed in you each time.

“That’s sweet.” Anger and frustration burns in the back of your throat, but you push it down with a tight lipped smile.

“And I got us reservations, so go get dressed.”

"What?"

"I got reservations. Come on." Ben makes a gesture with his hand.

“Oh I’m okay, I was just going to-“ You motion back at the bottle of wine, the couch, and the box of photos.

“No. I’m not going to let you sit here on your birthday. Come on. Let’s go.” Ben takes your arm and turns you around gently pushing you towards the small hallway that leads back to your bedroom with his hand on the small of your back.

You brace yourself for the warmth that follows with the brush of his fingers against you, but each time you're unprepared for how it makes you feel when he touches you.

“But I don’t have anything to wear! And if you do have a reservation, how much time do I have?” You argue, trying to come up with an excuse to avoid dinner.

As much as you wanted to go, you didn't want to sit there and pretend to be happy. You were tired of doing that, but then you raise your head to look Ben in the eye.

He's smiling down at you the same way he always has, looking like the boy who climbed in your window after flunking out of boarding school to bring you paint and your resolve wavers. You hated saying no to him.

Damn it.

“By the time you stop making excuses it will be time to go. And as sexy as those pajamas are, you can’t wear them to a restaurant.” Ben teases, tugging on the bottom oversized paint-splattered shirt you were wearing

“Fine.” You grumble, cheeks flushing bright red as you snatch the shirt from his hand. “Give me ten minutes.”

**************************************

"Shut up." Ben laughs from across the table at you. "Your mother loved me!"

His laughter is contagious, making your own release from your lips and ease the tension you are holding in your chest.

The Italian restaurant is small and filled with the soft lit of music from the band in the corner, the rich aromatic smell of food, and has the calming atmosphere of a intimate bar. When Ben parked out front, you were surprised. He usually liked the restaurants on page 6 where other heroes would be found eating and places where he could be photographed for the news, but this place was different, it was almost, special. And the way Ben was acting was unusual.

He'd walked around the car after he parked and took your hand in his, to lead you down the steps to the front door where a hostess had asked for his name. Ben had used his real name rather than Soldier Boy for a reservation and when you walked out of your bedroom wearing the dress you found at the back of your closet that you had for emergencies, you swore you saw his eyes darken as they trailed across your body making your breath catch in your chest. It was odd. Ben had taken you out for your birthday before, but tonight seemed to be filled with a palpable tension and electricity that you couldn’t place.

Then again, you were probably imagining it like always.

The restaurant was perfect, it made you forget about being a supe and the glamorous lifestyle that Ben indulged in and allowed you to pretend that you were normal. However, while you sat there together, you tried not to think about what you were going to have to tell him eventually, that you were leaving. He would ask for an answer why and you’d try to tell him the same thing you told him four years ago while avoiding screaming “because I love you, you fucking idiot” at the top of your lungs. 

But it was difficult to find a way to tell him, not when he had a soft smile on his face and every few minutes Ben would find some reason to touch you. So you allowed yourself to indulge in this, to have this last wonderful memory together before you have to tell him. And in doing so, you let yourself forget being a supe, forget everything else but Ben and you in this moment.

"Oh sure, you were her favorite." You snort into your wineglass. "She put a crucifix up over my window to keep you out. Every time you went to a new boarding school, she prayed in the living room with a rosary to God begging him to keep you far from me and she cried whenever you came back. Not to mention when you got me thrown out of boarding school she forbade me from seeing you-"

"But you couldn’t stay away." Ben sing-songs with a grin before taking a sip from his glass. "And your roommate was a fucking snitch."

"She was." You smile down at the table. "I also think she was a little jealous." You lean back in your chair, holding the wineglass in your right hand.

"Oh and why is that?" Ben's smirk widens.

"Don't make me say it-" Your eyes roll.

"Oh I want to hear you admit it." He leans towards you across the table, eyes shining with a mischievous glint that makes it suddenly hard to breathe.

“Not going to happen.”  You look around the room to distract yourself with the other couples.

All the tables around you were full of people sharing stories, holding hands, brushing feet under the table and for the first time you weren't jealous of their love. The couple next to you was practically breathing the same air, leaning towards each other with sappy looks in their eyes. You were happy for them, allowed yourself to be filled with compassion at their happiness. You remember what you said to Ben four years ago, about wanting to have someone to come home to, someone who loved you and then remember the night at the dancehall watching the elderly couple dance under the twinkling lights holding each other close and gazing deeply into one another's eyes.

You wanted someone to look at you like that, wanted someone to share you life with. You wanted that so badly, that in this moment you knew that you were making the right decision leaving because you would be closer to getting it, because the man across the table from you might be your best friend and have your heart, but he didn’t want to be more. And as much as it hurt to leave the only man you’d ever loved,  you knew it was the right thing.

Ben taps his index finger on your left hand where it rests on the table between you, drawing your eyes back to his. "Did I lose you Doll?"

"Hmm? No sorry. I was-" You smile at him. "Distracted. What were you asking?"

Ben's gaze shifts to the couple sitting to your right, the one you were watching a second ago, who are holding hands on top of the table. The man says something that makes his date laugh and lean towards him to grasp his other hand. The way he smiles at his date makes you smile. Ben's eyes slide back to yours and an odd look flashes through them that you can't identify.

"You know what I was asking." His index finger begins to brush over your knuckles in a smooth circular motion. Warmth trails with his touch, sending goosebumps dancing up your left arm.

Shock buzzes at the back of your mind, you didn't understand why he was doing that, Ben had barely had anything to drink tonight, in fact that was his first and only Whiskey. Not to mention when he showed up at your door he seemed more sober than usual. He didn't smell like reefer. So for him to touch you this much was unusual, especially when he wasn't drunk or high.

“Come on Sweetheart.” He smiles at you in a way that makes your heart ache.

"Fine. Pearl thought you were devilishly handsome and was upset that I danced with you when I had Howard-"

"Don't mention that pussy." Ben’s smirk drops into a frown and he stops moving his finger against the back of your hand.

"I don't understand why you were so jealous of him." You try not to think about how much you wish he would start moving his finger again.

"I was not jealous of that idiot." Ben rolls his eyes.

"Uh-huh. After all these years, you still can't admit it." You tease him taking another sip of wine. It was giving you a pleasant buzz that made you feel just a little bit warm and bold enough to make you brush your thumb against his where his hand sits only a few millimeters from yours.

If he was touching you, you thought that maybe it would be okay for you to touch him, maybe it was okay to pretend that he wanted to hold your hand as much as you wanted to hold his, like the couple next to you were.

"I will if you admit you were jealous of Missy Callahan." Ben's eyes trail down to your thumb before looking back up at you, waiting for your answer.

"I was not-"

Ben raises an eyebrow. “I can hear your heartbeat Doll.”

“Just as I can hear yours Darling.” You smile back at him.

“Y/n.” He chuckles.

You roll your eyes at his ridiculous smile. "Fine, I will admit that was a little jealous of her, but she was awful.  She was dumb as a rock and she was the most terrible gossip-"

"I knew it." Ben smirks.

You sit there in silence for a minute gazing at Ben, your eyebrow raised. "I'm waiting."

"Oh I'm not going to admit that I was jealous of Howard. I just wanted to hear you say the thing about Missy." Ben laughs, beginning to run his index finger against the back of your hand again. His eyes on yours, as if he's gauging your reaction.

"Bastard." You roll your eyes at him. "Did I tell you that I saw Howard?"

"What?" Ben looks surprised.

"Yeah, when I went to my brother's-" You clear your throat remembering when you saw Howard four years ago. You don’t know why he went to your brother’s funeral, but he was there, gray hair slicked back staring at you open mouthed. The last time you'd seen him was the day after he proposed, when you tried to give him back the ring and he refused, stating that he wanted you to keep it, to think about it. He never got over the break up, never dating anyone else, never married. It had been an awkward reunion, especially since he kept trying to corner you, but you evaded him expertly through the crowd. You weren't interested in making awkward small-talk about the past forty years.

Ben's hand finally slips into yours, intwining your fingers together because he understands what you’re about to say. "I'm sorry I didn't go with you, I should have."

It was weird that Ben wasn’t with you, but it was also weird because you tried to comfort your sister in law and her son and his family, but it felt forced. Ben was the only person who understood what it was like for everyone to age around you while you stayed the same. Standing there to celebrate the life of your brother while you, yourself couldn't die completely or even age felt awkward. You found yourself longing for Ben when you were away, wishing that he was there to hold your hand or try to deflect some of the awkward conversations, none of which were focused on your brother and were all about you being a supe. You hated how much you depended on him.

After the funeral you had stayed in Philadelphia an extra week to help your family and when Ben called to see how you were you broke down on the phone. Ben had showed up within the next hour at your hotel and sat with you while you cried. It was one of your favorite memories, because Ben held you gently against him, whispering "It's okay Sweetheart, I've got you" while you pressed your face into his shirt, letting the smell of whiskey and his cologne soak into your skin. It was so unlike him and it made you believe that Ben wanted more, but then he never acknowledged it, like always.

"Ben it's okay, you were there when it mattered. And you went to both of my parent's funerals. Surprising because my mother would have hated that you were there. Always said you were going to ruin my life." You meant for it to be a joke, but the look in Ben's eyes shifts to something more vulnerable for a millisecond before it hardens again.

"Did I?" He asks quietly. Ben looks down at where he was holding your hand, his thumb beginning to move over the smooth skin on the back.

The question catches you off guard. It was the very question that you had been considering the past few days before you finally decided to leave all of this and your best friend. But the truth was you didn't believe that Ben ruined your life, you blamed yourself, blamed yourself for loving your best friend, blamed yourself for loving someone who didn’t love you the same way.

And it wasn’t that you hated your life, it was different than what you would have planned for yourself, but you liked parts of it. Not to mention you would have hated it more if you had said no to Ben and married Howard. If anything, Ben had saved you and you were thankful for that.

Of course the way he's looking at you and holding your hand is making it difficult for you to consider leaving. It seemed like every time you tried, Ben would do something like this- take you out to dinner or act like he wanted you and only you, and then you would reconsider. Four years ago it had been him holding you after your brother’s funeral and now it was this.

"Ben." You sigh, squeezing his hand and putting as much love into your gaze as you can. "No. You didn't. If anything you freed me. I didn't want to be with Howard and I was too afraid to say it until you asked me to come with you.”

“He could have given you a life though. You said that’s what you wanted.” For a second you think you see Ben’s eyes flick to the couple on your right with his words.

Your mind stutters to a halt in surprise. He remembered what we talked about four years ago? After he almost killed Noir?

“Um-" You clear your throat to recover. "And if you remember that conversation, you should also remember I said I didn’t want that life with Howard.”

“Yes, but you said you wanted to marry someone.” The ends of his lip twitches, but he doesn’t smile. “Still waiting on that wedding invite.” His thumb is stroking long smooth patterns on the back of your hand, making your throat tight and making it impossible to think.

“I’m sure you’ll get it any day now. Legend is happy that I finally said yes.”

“I should have known. Y’all looked pretty cozy at that party two weeks ago.” Ben laughs. “So if you’re engaged to him, does that mean you don’t want your birthday present?”

“I’ve said it once and I’ve said it again, I’m too old for birthdays.”

“Then why did you come out with me?”

“Oh I’m just going to write this off as old friends having dinner. That or a kidnapping. You practically dragged me to the car.”

“Be thankful I let you change.” Ben replies.

“I don’t know, I think I would have really made a statement with my paint splattered shirt and sweatpants."

You’d chosen the dress you were wearing at random. It was a dark green, the same color as Ben’s supe suit, off your right shoulder cinched around your waist and fell elegantly to your ankles. It was one of your favorites, something you believed accentuated your body effortlessly.

"They were something. Though I think that you-" Ben pauses, dropping his eyes to where he's still holding your hand, before looking back up at you. "Um-"

"What?" You smile.

He clears his throat, a soft smile on his face. "I think you look beautiful now too."

Your next words dry up in your mouth, there's not a shred of joking or teasing in Ben's eyes. Ben had said it before, but with a mischievous glint in his eyes, but now there is only sincerity. And it makes your heart jolt out of rhythm.

He said too. That means that he thought I looked beautiful before when I was-

"Thank you." You flush red and squeeze his hand. "I don't think you look too bad yourself, you know, for a old man." You add that last part because you don’t know what to say when he's looking at you like that.

Ben's smile slips into a frown. "You should be nicer to me, I got you a birthday present."

“See, you keep saying that, but I haven’t seen it.”

“I thought you didn’t want it.” The mischievous glint is back in his eye.

“I could be persuaded.” You smirk.

Ben releases your hand and reaches into his coat pocket to pull out a long navy blue velvet box wrapped in a thick silver bow before sliding it across the white tablecloth.

“You get me another paintbrush?” You smirk running a fingertip over the velvet top to examine it while acutely missing the feeling of his hand grasped in yours.

“Something like that.”

“Did you steal it?” You pick up the box and wave it for emphasis, remembering all the times Ben stole little things from the stores that lined Downtown Philadelphia and the box he had hidden under his bed filled with random trinkets.

You never understood why he did that. Ben's family was almost as wealthy as yours and although his father didn't approve of anything Ben was doing, he never cut him off.

“Maybe.” He shrugs and leans on the table towards you, his eyes filled with excitement.

“With how much money they pay you for those ridiculous films you shouldn’t be stealing anything.”

“I’m sure if you sold your artwork instead of shoving it in the closet you’d be just as wealthy as me.”

“Yes, but my grand plan is to have you pay for everything so I can continue to use you and I can’t do that if I’m rich."

“You can use me anytime sweetheart.” Ben winks.

“Shut up.” You roll your eyes at him, but can't stop the blush that stains your cheeks at his insinuation.

Everything about tonight felt just like old times, the way he joked with you and the way you couldn't stop smiling, but at the same time, something else nagged at the back of your mind. The handholding was new, as were the compliments and deeper conversation, especially because Ben wasn't drunk or high, and yet he was being gentler than usual, almost soft. And that was something Ben never was, at least not in public.

You tried not to be frustrated with the turn of events and just enjoy the moment, but deep down you wanted to know.

Was Ben doing this because he cared? Or was he doing this because he sensed I was unhappy and that I was leaving and he thought this was the only way to keep me around?

“Come on, open it.”

“Fine.” You smile down at the box and slowly slide off the bow. “Please tell me you have photos of you trying to tie this bow. Preferably while you were wearing your supe suit.”

“I already destroyed the evidence.”

 “Figures.” You sigh. “Would have been a nice birthday present.”

“I think this is better, but given the pace you’re going at I’ll still be sitting here waiting for you to open it at your next birthday.” Ben takes a drink from his glass.

“Which I won’t be celebrating.”

"Oh you're going to. I’ll make sure.” 

You roll your eyes at him, before finally opening the velvet box and your next joke is forgotten as you struggle to catch your breath. You were expecting something art related. Ben always got you brushes, paints, colored pencils, and any other art supply-like gift, because he knew that you liked those things but not tonight. Because for your 65th birthday Ben decided to get you something that took your breath away.

Nestled in black velvet is a pearl necklace, elegant, beautiful, catching in the fluttering warm light of the restaurant as the band in the corner continues to play a jazzy tune that makes you remember the records your father would listen to while he smoked before bedtime.

“Ben-“ You begin to say, but you can’t finish your sentence, you're too surprised to say anything else.

Not once in all the years you’d been friends had Ben bought you jewelry. Shopping for his birthday was harder, his last one you had gotten him a pair of silver cufflinks that he was currently wearing, but each time you bought him something like that it didn't feel like you were revealing too much about how you felt and it never felt like a gift you would give someone who was more than your friend. But now, staring down at the necklace that Ben bought you feels, intimate almost romantic.

“I remembered how upset you were when you lost the one your dad got you.” Ben says slowly, his eyes on you. “I know it’s not the same one, but the lady in the store said it was the most like the ones they made when we were younger and I thought-“ He rubs the back of his neck. “Um- I thought you’d like it.”

You smile, still unable to speak, fighting the happy tears that build behind your eyes. You had lost the necklace your father got you a few months ago and you tore your entire apartment apart to find it. Ben had walked right into the middle of the chaos and found you a sobbing mess.

Your father had bought it for you on your 23rd birthday. It was your first birthday as a supe and your first one away from home. Your father had it delivered to you with a vase of fresh cut lavender, because you couldn’t go home and he couldn’t get away.  It was one of the last things you had from him, besides the antique watch perched on your wrist.

“I can’t believe you remembered that.” You swallow the ball of emotion lodged in your throat.

“I do listen to you.”

You look up and raise an eyebrow.

“Sometimes.” His soft smile makes you feel light headed and makes you wish all over again that you had the courage to tell Ben the three little words that you'd always wanted to.

“I don’t know what to say-“

“Too much? Because I can take it back and buy you a paintbrush-“ Ben starts to reach for the box, but you catch his hand against the table tangling your fingertips together.

“No. It's perfect. Thank you Ben.”

He looks relieved by your answer. “You’re welcome.”

The soft sounds of conversation swell around you mixing with the tinkling of utensils against plates and the music that pours from the band in the corner where a singer dressed in a long red sequined gown sings a familiar song. But you can't stop admiring the necklace nestled in the fabric, your hand still clasped in Ben's on top of the table.

Ben finally breaks the silence. “Do you want me to help you put it on?”

You blink for a minute to comprehend what he was asking, raising your eyes to his genuine smile. "Please.”

Ben stands from his chair and comes around behind you as you gently twist your hair out of the way, so he has access to your neck. His rough fingertips brush against the smooth skin of your neck sending a shiver down your spine that you hope Ben misses because how would you explain that? When he secures it at the back of your neck you look down at the pearls, holding them between your thumb and forefinger.

"They're beautiful." You whisper, before looking back up at him.

"Yes, beautiful." He responds, but Ben isn't looking at your necklace, his eyes are locked on your face.

What is going on?

"Ben-" You begin to say, attempting for the first time to ask him why he does this, acts different around you, gives you hope and then takes it all away, but he interrupts you.

"Come on." His hand falls on yours and he pulls you up out of your chair, weaving through the other tables to stand in front of the band in the corner. His right hand finds the small of your back, while his left gently holds your right in the air.

"What are you doing?" You ask.

"Isn't it obvious?" Ben smiles. "We're dancing."

"No one else is dancing." You look around the room at the couples sitting quietly together enjoying their meals, who have begun to watch Ben and you sway to the music.

He leans forward to whisper into the curve of your ear. "Then let's show them how it's done Sweetheart."

You can't help but laugh at him, enjoying the way that he feels pressed against you, how it makes you feel alive in the best way, how you feel safe in his arms. Being here, swaying to the last few notes of the song with him made you reconsider leaving again. Ben was the only person who knew you completely, inside and out, the only person who seemed to understand you. Choosing to leave him would be like choosing to leave home, because after everything you'd been through, Ben was home.

As soon as the song ends, the one that follows is familiar, a tune that sparks a memory at the back of your mind. You raise your eyes to Ben's. His are crinkled with his smile, a mischievous glint behind them.

"Ben, did you tell them to play-"

"Yeah. I told them to play our song." He whispers, holding you tighter against him.

The memory of the night you first danced warms against your skin. You remembered it well. It was the night that you almost told him you loved him, the same thing you were considering right now. You couldn't believe that he remembered the song you danced to. You smile at the memory of that night, when Ben punched Howard in the face and it gave you a sickening amount of joy.

“What are you smiling at?” Ben asks you.

“I still can’t believe you hit him.” You shake your head with a laugh.

"He hurt you. And I didn't like that he made me stop dancing with my girl."

You sigh before you can stop yourself the phrase immediately making the laughter dissipate and making the warm feeling at his touch fade. Tonight Ben was again making you think that he wanted to be more, and worst of all it was making it harder to leave. Because what if this was him trying to tell you the only way he knew how? What if this was him finally admitting that he loved you and you just left?

"What?” He frowns down at you.

“I don’t know why you keep calling me that.”

"What?"

"Your 'girl'." You bite the inside of your cheek to keep the frustration from making you say more.

 “You don't think you are?"

“What do you think it means? To me it means being in a relationship with someone. We have been friends for over fifty years and you have never once said that you wanted to be more-"

"I did try to propose.” Ben jokes, not understanding that you’re upset.

"Really? That was your proposal?" You scoff rolling your eyes. "A joke while you were sitting on my shitty couch drunk off your ass while trying to apologize for almost killing Noir and telling me that you hate when I get in your way?  Forgive me for imagining some big gesture and for not swooning."

“I wasn’t that drunk.”

“Oh please-“

“I’m fucking serious.” He shrugs.

“What?” You look him in the eye to look for the teasing glint, but it's not there, Ben looks serious.

“I wasn’t that drunk.”

“Don’t tease me.”

“I’m not.” Ben’s eyes lock with yours. “I also didn’t apologize for almost killing him. And I do hate when you get in my way." 

"Yes, I figured that given how angry you looked." You roll your eyes, glancing to look at the couples around you again, but this time the happiness you felt for them is gone. The jealousy is back coupled with the frustration of Ben acting like Ben and then pulling a complete 180 the next day and making you question everything. Because you wanted to exist in the moments that he was still Ben and you didn’t want to leave him, but you did want to leave Soldier Boy. The problem was right now all you saw was Ben and you hated that you couldn’t enjoy it because you knew it would end. Someone would piss him off or he’d get drunk or high or go down the rabbit hole with some other woman and Ben would be gone.

You didn’t understand how he could go from hot to cold so quickly.

“But I didn’t lie when I said I’d never hurt you.” Ben's voice rumbles up through where his chest is pressed against yours.

You want to say that you believe him, but after the past forty years you weren’t sure anymore. And that thought hurt more than anything else. You didn’t know your best friend anymore, and it scared you.

Your eyes are leveled on Ben’s chest, by now he’s stopped swaying you to the music. You know what will happen when you look up into his eyes, he'll make a joke or say something like the last forty years never happened and you'll crumble like always. You can feel his breath against your face, the warmth of his body transferring through his chest and soaking into yours.

“Y/n, please look at me.” He releases your hand and cups your cheek to tilt you head upwards to him. The one still planted on your back slides down to your waist, tightening around you as you lock eyes with him. “You know that I’d never hurt you. Right?”

Ben's eyes lock on yours, the love and care reflected in the irises makes your body burn. He's never looked at you like that, looked at you like you were the only woman in the world and deep down it makes you want to pull him close and whisper the three little words you've wanted to say for fifty seven years.

You focus on Ben's words to shake it off, it was the same thing he’d said four years ago, but this time the air between you is charged with electricity.

And you can’t take it anymore.

“Why?” You whisper.

It catches him off guard. “What?”

“Why are you different with me? When the cameras stop rolling, when the team goes home, when it’s just the two of us, you’re different." You stop to catch your breath.  "Ben, I’ve known you for fifty seven years. And in the last forty you’ve changed. But not around me, not when it’s just the two of us. You show up at my apartment in the middle of the night, we talk, we laugh about the past, you sleep in my bed, you call me 'your girl'-”

“You’ve known me longer than anyone else-” His hand is still cupping your cheek now, thumb gently brushing against the smooth skin making your throat tight.

“But even before all this, when we were still in Philadelphia. You were always around me, showing up, taking me out to do things in the city. Ben, we both know how you are. I watched you chase after whatever caught your eye and even now-“ You shake your head frustrated. “But you never act that way with me.”

Ben is quiet for a minute, his eyes searching yours, soft green in the fluttering lights above your heads. “Because you’re different y/n. You’ve always been different.”

“But that doesn’t tell me why Ben. We’ve been doing this for so long and I want-“ You sigh frustrated with yourself because you can’t say it, can’t say that you want him. “I mean I’m not sure if I can-“ You were going to say that you weren’t sure you could do this anymore, that you wished he would let you go, wished that you could walk away, and wished that he would stop giving you hope that the two of you could be something more because you couldn’t do it.

But the words are stopped when his lips meet yours.

You inhale sharply in surprise, before your entire body melts against his, deepening the kiss as you drag your hands up into his dark hair, while your mind goes blissfully blank. Ben’s mouth is firm but tender against yours, moving in a slow dance that makes warm tingles trail down your spine. The hand that was on your cheek, joins the other on your waist. His hand tightens on your hip as your song continues to play while the other presses against the small of your back to secure you against him. The solidness of his chest is familiar, molding against your curves in the best way as if he was made for you and you were made for him. You feel his thumb begin to circle slowly against the fabric on your hipbone and suddenly you remember the night he helped you loosen your corset and all you wanted was him. You never thought it would feel like this.

When you finally pull away for air, Ben doesn’t let you go far, he leans his forehead against yours, the look in his eyes is surprisingly vulnerable, as if he thinks you’re going to push him away.

“I-“ He begins, his green eyes are wide almost afraid.

Why?

You raise your hands to gently cup his strong jaw, searching his eyes with a smile to confirm you aren't going anywhere, before pulling him back to you for another kiss that makes your toes curl in the tight shoes you forced them into an hour ago. Ben sighs into your mouth, a soft sound that surprises you. You had seen him kiss other people before. Ben was anything but gentle, but now you believed that he reserved that gentleness just for you and it made you feel like you were going to melt into a puddle.

When you pull back again, Ben’s forehead is still against yours, his eyes bright and unmoving from your face. For a moment neither of you speaks, too afraid to break the silence.

“What’s going on in that pretty little head of yours Sweetheart?” Ben asks, the deep rumble of his voice working up through where your chest is pressed against his. His expression is gentle, and he brings up one of the hands that was on your waist to trace the pillow of your lips with his thumb.

And before you lose your nerve your smile curves into a smirk.  “Took you long enough Benjamin.”

“Shut up.” He rolls his eyes at you.

“Make me.” You mutter against his thumb.

And then he’s kissing you again, moving his lips in tandem with yours while your heart flutters and dances. And you never want it to end, because he's kissing you like he never wants to let you go and you're kissing him like you don't want him to.

“You’re so fucking beautiful.” Ben mutters against your lips with a smile, his deep eyes catching yours. "Don't be jealous of Missy Callahan. She's nothing compared to you, never has been, never will be."

Your heart warms, cheeks blushing with his words, because even after all these years, Ben still knew exactly what to say. You hold his face reverently, admiring the familiar dips and curves, thumbs brushing over his cheekbones. "Don't be jealous of Howard. He meant nothing to me. No one means as much to me as you do Ben."  You whisper back before you kiss him and allow yourself to fall again, hoping that this time he’ll catch you.

*************************************

“Did you want something to drink?” You ask Ben, gesturing with your free hand towards the kitchen.

Standing in your apartment feels different post kiss. It feels like this all represents something bigger now. The apartment, him coming upstairs even though he has spent most of the nights here since you bought it and of course the way he’s looking at you, how he’s been unable to stop looking at you since he kissed you.

“Are you going to get it for me?” Ben is still holding your hand, had held it the entire car ride, only releasing it when he got out to open the door for you and then took it again as you walked up to your apartment. His thumb is moving across the back in a soothing motion that makes you want to curl up in the warmth that trails behind like a cat in the sun.

“I’m sure you remember where it is”

“Mhmm.” Ben is eyeing you again, the green in his eyes darkening in a way that makes your throat tight.

You’re not sure who moves first, all you know is that someone closes the distance between you, and you lose yourself in him. Your curves melt against the hard muscles of Ben’s chest and arms as he pulls you into him, his hands  gripping your waist so tight that you know there might be bruises but you don’t care.

Your hands trail up his muscular chest to tangle in his hair, pulling at the darkened strands and forcing his mouth harder against yours.

He tastes like whiskey and smoke, night and day, and all those bittersweet moments you’ve shared over the years you’ve known him. There is no semblance of Soldier Boy left behind, it’s just Ben and you and it's everything you wanted for so long. The kiss is charged with so much emotion and tension you feel something inside you snap and warmth floods your body in its wake. Ben moans into your mouth, his hands coming down to sweep low over your curves and ignites a fire in the pit of your stomach that you’ve never felt before.

There had been others try to do exactly this. Other heroes you politely declined because you didn’t feel anything for them. You remember the kisses with Howard, passionless, boring, but being here with Ben was like nothing you’d ever imagined. The subtle scratch of his scruff against your cheeks makes you lose all feeling in your legs, his strong embrace makes goosebumps burn against your skin, and the sounds he’s making against your lips makes your heart seize in your chest.

He backs you up and you both fall on the couch in a tangle of limbs, his body caging you beneath him while his fingertips boldly trail against your body, finding places that make you moan into his mouth.

You can feel his smirk against your lips and you’ve never felt more sexy in your life. Ben’s moans against every piece of skin he can get his lips against make you blush crimson and echo his cries with soft sounds that make him grip you tighter. His hands are everywhere, coaxing along your curves, discovering places that you didn’t know could be sensitive and that make you gasp and arch against him as he continues to kiss you.

Everything about this feels right, feels perfect, as if you were both made for this exact moment. The subtle drag of his hands against you, the firm assertive way he holds you beneath him, how your body responds to his touch, and the way your heart continues to swell in your chest, frantically beating as if it wishes to break free. You forget about all the other women he's ever been with, all the others he's probably held close, nothing else exists at this moment, nothing else exists except him and you here on this couch. His lips ghost to your neck as he sucks a mark into the column of your throat and you realize he's saying your name over and over the way that no one ever has.

There’s a loud ripping noise and you understand that Ben ripped off the bottom half of your dress, the tattered remains just barely brushing against your thighs. But you can’t be angry with him for that, not when everything he’s doing feels perfect.

Ben’s hands slowly begin to push up the bottom of your now ruined dress and you come back down from your high, feeling the gentle press of his fingers against your thigh as they begin to move upwards.

“Ben-" You breathe.

You hate how breathy your voice sounds, but the new sensations running through your body are almost too overwhelming for you to gain control of. If you weren't both as indestructible as you were you would be afraid of the possibility of killing Ben.

He moans into your neck, working his hand up further to a place that makes your grip his shoulders tight and you leave bruises of your own, because you’re the only person strong enough to bruise him, to leave marks against his almost invulnerable skin. And it makes a shudder go down his spine.

"Ben wait-"

He stops, looking down at you with wide eyes, pupils dilated in a way that almost sends you back into a frenzy with him. "What's wrong?" He is also out of breath, chest rising and falling fast. You can hear his heart beat thundering in his chest, beating in tandem with yours.

“Before we do this I just want to tell you that I’ve never-" You bite your lip nervously. "I've never done this before.”

“This?” He looks confused, withdrawing his hand from under your ruined dress.

“Well- you know." You gesture between the two of you. "This.”

"You've never had sex with anyone before?"

"No." You flush bright red wondering if that's a deal breaker for him. If he wanted someone more experienced. "I’m sorry."

He sits there for a minute, staring down at you. "Why are you apologizing?” Ben’s hand brushes your hair away from your face in a gentle gesture, so different than the heavy caresses of his hands against your curves he did earlier.

“I don’t know.” You whisper embarrassed. “I just- everyone else has and I’m pretty sure you have with millions of people.”

“Well not millions.”

“But still.” You suddenly think that this was a giant mistake, that you should just go to your room in shame. You drop your eyes to his chest embarrassed.

His hands are stroking along your waist, toying with the frayed edges of your dress. “Y/n.” He whispers.

“What?” You mumble.

Ben raises his hand to cup your cheek, turning your gaze back on him. The way he’s looking at you causes a hot jolt of energy to race down your spine and makes you wish that you were more confident or knew what you were doing.

 He’d been with hundreds of women all kinds of women and what had I been doing all these years? Nothing and no one. I’m not really sure if I understood the mechanics OF sex- but oh how I wished. My head was just getting in the way of everything else as usual.

“I will admit that I have slept with a lot of women.” Ben sighs. “But it’s okay. We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to-“

“I want to.”

 “Are you sure? I don’t know if I’m the best person for this-“ And for a moment you think he looks almost worried.

Why would he think that?

“I’m sure. I want it to be you. I’ve always wanted it to be you.” You breathe, running your hands through his hair, your cheeks flushing bright red with your confession, afraid that you’re saying too much, giving too much away as to how much he means to you.

“Really?” Ben smiles in a way that makes your breath catch.

You nod.

“I can’t promise it won’t hurt.” The darkness in his eyes shifts to something else and for a moment it’s difficult for you to form a sentence. He leans his forehead against yours, searching your eyes.  “I don’t want to hurt you.” Ben whispers it like a secret.

“You’re not going to hurt me. I trust you Ben.” You whisper, knotting you hands in his hair.

“You do?”

You nod your head. “And I’m pretty sure that I’m just as capable of hurting you-“

“Maybe.” The look in his eyes is back, blazing through his green irises in a way that makes your throat swell closed. He bends over to whisper against the curve of your ear. “Then again, I kinda like that Sweetheart.” His lips brush just behind your right ear, making a shiver go down your spine. Ben smiles at your reaction before he dips down to kiss you, but it’s different, the kiss is soft, trusting, and not the previous manic haze of desire it was previously. “ I know you think it’s a big deal, but I like that I’m your first. Because it means that no other man has touched you, made you feel any of the things that I’m going to do to you, and that I’ll never have to share you with anyone else.” His grip on your waist tightens possessively. “That you’ll be completely and utterly mine and no one else can do a damn thing.”

You inhale and try not to faint from the darkened look in his eyes. “Well when you put it that way-“

“Come on.” Ben stands from the couch.

Before you can get up to follow he picks you up like you weigh nothing causing you to automatically wrap your thighs around his waist as he kisses you feverishly again, wiping your mind of anything and everything but him.

“What are you doing?” You breathe, entangling your hands at the nape of his neck to secure yourself.

“I’m not going to let your first time be on some shitty couch.” He mutters against your lips while adjusting his grip under your legs

And with that he takes you down the hall and kicks your bedroom door closed behind you.

********************************************

A/N: Well it finally happened. Unfortunately this is also when all hell breaks loose…

Thank you so much for reading! If you'd like to be added to my taglist for this series let me know :)

Taglist: @roseblue373 @anundyingfidelity @cheynovak @cassiecasluciluce @muhahaha303 @deans-spinster-witch @kayleighmeister @demodemo909 @fruitfacess @bobbobbobinogs @bughill126, @simplyfixated @sleepjam, @tiredstrangerr @freefallthoughts,@onlyangel-444 @lov3vivian @mxltifxnd0m @mayafatimakhan

#soldier boy x you #jensen ackles soldier boy #soldier boy #soldier boy x female reader #soldier boy x reader #soldier boy x y/n #soldier boy/ben #soldier boy fanfiction #soldier boy fic #the boys amazon #the boys fanfic #jensen ackles #jackles #the boys #the boys season 3 #the boys series #the boys tv #the boys s3

[rainybubbles]

Silent- Gaz x plus size reader

Summary : Finding a way to relieve the stress of work in a DnD discord, Gaz meets Silent. A player whose microphone is always turned off, using chat only. Maybe he'll find a way to break the silence with them and finds why their mic is off…

(Sorry in advance, English is not my first language, so sorry if it's bad or OOC.)

-TW social anxiety.

-"What a quiet kid you've got there. I wish mine was as calm at home."

-"Oh, you know, they're pretty mature for their age."

-The laughter faded into distant murmurs as I glanced over at the other kids.

-Yelling, chasing, breaking a vase or two—my eyes couldn't look away from them.

-They seemed to inhabit a world entirely different from mine.

-A world where scraping by at month's end, nightly dinners, locking up the house, solo bus rides, laundry routines, and helping siblings with homework simply didn't exist.

-Because, after all, they were just eight years old.

- But so was I…

-So why didn't I have the right to have fun, yell, chat, ask for sweets, act immature, or doodle on walls?

- My hand reached out briefly, hoping for a connection, but my mom's glance quickly reminded me to stay put…

-Being silent seemed to be the key to earning praise and keeping peace.

-So, I stifled that urge, withdrawing into myself, standing alone behind her legs, engulfed in a heavy silence.

____________

"Silent, huh?"

-My gaze drifted slowly to the chat.

-"Yeah, dude, they're usually a regular on Thursdays. Never says a word, their mic's busted, can't afford to fix it," one of the guys responded.

-The tone carried a hint of disdain.

-I felt out of place.

-Yet, I stayed put, unable to leave the server.

-It was the only place where I felt I could express myself.

-Through words, carefully chosen, controlled, retyped, erased, and sculpted to bring a story to life—a space where my imagination, so often overlooked, could finally roam free.

-By chance, I'd become enamored with Dungeons and Dragons.

- The only snag, of course, was the void in my social life.

-So, like figuring out how long it takes to cook broccoli, I scoured the internet.

- Discord groups organized sessions. I panicked at the sound of mics, voices.

- What would they think of me? What should I say? What could I do? And then someone asked if my mic was broken.

- Ever since, I'd stayed that way, and the nickname Silent stuck.

"Hi Silent, then :) I'm Kyle aka Gaz."

-Usually, I ignored introductions.

- People interested me little, their characters were the interesting ones.

-However, Gaz hadn't spoken those words aloud.

- He had written them. It was stupid honestly, but few people wrote back to me, few people responded to me in writing.

-Everything was done orally.

-Suddenly, someone was on my turf, reaching out.

-The campaign proceeded as usual.

-My thoughts were focused on my actions, the dice rolls, and the resulting outcomes.

- Yet occasionally, I let my eyes wander over Gaz's profile.

________________

-"Hello guys, I don't know if I've played with some of you before or not. "

-"Don't worry, we accept everyone. The days are rarely fixed."

-Gaz was back. It was Friday. It was my favorite group, the game master Ylias really managed to transport you.

-"Well, I'll start then-"

-Ylias started rambling, I followed the story when I noticed a notification in the discord. My finger brushed it, and then ignored it.

-What would he think if I clicked now? that I'm a friendless attention-seeker? But if I wait, they'll think I don't care about the campaign?

-So I waited 5 minutes, trying to find the right balance between the two.

-"Hey, Silent. I missed a campaign without you, the others keep on rambling about their athletics, last time I even had a guy mimicking a goblin with his mic, I'm glad to see you back in text :) !!!"

-Pressure flooded over me. What should I reply? A heart? Thanks? Ignore it? Tell him he's nice too?

-"Thanks."

-Too cold, too short. I thought it wrong, I should delete it, rephrase it, add a smiley, make it warmer, he must think I'm a monster.

-"I think we should try opening the door, are you coming with me? I don’t feel like going into the forest with the rest of the team."

-Oh. Usually in campaigns, I go with the flow, I heal and stay in the background. I never-

-"You need a score of 13 for that, folks". Ylias said.

-"Come on, Silent, roll the dice." Gaz replied

-Nervously, my mouse hovered over the virtual dice. With a score of 15 showing, I heard Gaz's laughter.

-"I knew we had to do it! Let’s go, plus with your stealth, impossible to get spotted. "

-"We'll see about that." Ylias replied, laughing.

-And just like that, Gaz made me smile. It was probably one of the worst campaigns, but it was the first where I could finally choose my actions.

__________________________

-"Back again :) ?"

-" Yes."

-Dry, too dry.

-"I was waiting for you. "Gaz replied.

-" Why? "

-"I don’t want to play a campaign without you, you bring me luck."

-" I'm not sure about that. "

-"Yes. I tried a campaign with colleagues, we died blowing up. "

-"Probably because of your colleagues. "

-"Okay, maybe my colleague set fire to a mystery barrel. But it was their first campaign. "

-"You're recruiting? "

-"Introducing them. He's trying to quit smoking, and I thought DnD could occupy his free time."

-I stopped myself.

-Curiosity, imagination, everything overwhelmed me.

-What was it like to be close to colleagues like this, to freely discuss your passions, to laugh…

-"And then?"

-" It's not his thing, he's more into action. "

-"I see. "

-"It's not for everyone. "

-"Is it your thing? "

-"What? "

-"To let off steam? If your colleague needs it, so do you, right?"

-Stupid. Too personal a question. Invasive.

-"Yes. It allows me not to think, to be someone else."

-" Me too."

-" Plus, being an elf is great."

-" You say that because I am one."

-" Maybe. "

-"Thank you. "

-"For? "

-"Talking in chat. People usually ignore me outside of campaigns, they don't respond by text."

-" They ignore the sexiest elf?"

-" There's no image, you don't know what I look like"

-". Hm, exactly! I imagine your elf tall, muscular like the Rock, hair like Gordon Ramsay's, and maybe makeup like Ru Paul's."

-" I'm not sure about the result. "

-"Sexy."

-I snorted at my screen.

-"Ok."

-" How do you imagine me? "

-"Your wizard? "

-"Yes. "

-"With long hair, maybe dreadlocks, white eyes, and a smile. "

-"A smile?"

-" Your voice sounds soothing. "

-"Really? "

-"Yes, sorry, it's weird to say that, I shouldn't have."

-" No. No. I've never been told that, I was just surprised, that's all."

-" I see. "

-"So, a sexy elf and a smiling mage.

-"Sounds like the beginning of a weird porno."

-He responded with a meme.

_________________________

-"So, what do we decide, Silent? Honestly, I don't want to raid the goblin but the vampire to face, I'm sure the score will be high." Gaz asked through his mic

-"It's your choice, not mine."

-"they're right, Gaz, this one's all on you," Ylias said.

-"Can't I even ask for help?"

-"Score of 15 in insight to spot an ally." Ylias announced.

-Gaz scored a 10. No one addressed me throughout the campaign.

________________________

-"Back, Gaz?" someone said.

-Three weeks of radio silence.

-My mind had been looping, wondering if my refusal to break the rules had driven him to find a more interesting group, a more exciting duo.

-But there he stood, his username glowing green.

-"Yeah, I finally got some days off."

-"Good for you, man."

-"So spill, I see some new names and all!"

-Strangely, his voice had become grating to me. I didn't understand why, so before he could reach me, I disconnected.

- Alone in my apartment, I held my knees to my chest.

-Why am I reacting like this? He's entitled to a life, damn it.

-I fet like he...gave me up.

-Shit it's stupid.

-I didn't understand. I tried to calm myself, but the deafening silence of my apartment seemed to slowly engulf me, and before I knew it, I found myself in a new spiral of anxiety.

____________________________

-There were no campaigns. I just liked reading. Reading what had happened. Living vicariously, imagining their voices, their reactions.

-"hey :)"

-The off-campaign tab was blinking.

-He was addressing me, I knew it, I was the only one online with him.

-My thumb grazed the notification, but I ended up entering the chat.

-"hey."

The period was too harsh, too dry.

-"It's been a while! Something happened?"

-"Work." I answered.

-That's a lie.

- But lying is like oxygen, it's easy to come up with excuses to avoid others.

-But harder to let go of it to face the potential risks of social suffocation.

-"I know quite a bit, just got back from mine."

-"At 1 am?"

-"Yep."

-"Cook?"

"Soldier."

-A shiver ran through me. Uniforms had never been positive in my life.

- As the long seconds passed, I hesitated.

-"Not a fan?" Gaz asked.

-"You could say that."

-"Military family?"he asked.

-"yes."

-"I see."

-"Sorry, that's stupid."

-"No, I understand, I mean, we all have red flags." He said.

-"It's not a red flag."

-"You'd been quiet for 5 minutes."

-"With everyone." I answered.

-"Everyone?"

-"I'm not the best at socializing."

-"Really? Yet when you blew up a castle instead of talking to the princess in a campaign, it seemed normal to me." He joked.

-A laugh escaped.

-"And you?" he asked.

-"Me?"

-"Your job?"

-"Proofreader."

-"For books?"

-"Yes, I read, annotate, and correct."

-"No humans."

-"Exactly."

-"Would you like to add me? I'm not super comfortable with everyone seeing this."

-"Why?"

-Stupid. I should have accepted without questioning.

-"To prevent everyone from knowing the secrets of the sexiest elf on the discord."

-Always there to catch my blunders.

-I accepted it even though suddenly there was added pressure, what to say when there's a pause?

_____________

-"A dragon arrives and—"

-My eyes glanced at my notifications. Kyle was in the campaign but—

-"The narration is terrible, isn't it? The guy has been stuck on the dragon for thirty minutes while Théis killed it."

-He was writing to me. Like someone whispering in your ear during class.

-"Yes, Roxanne is a beginner, but she'll get there."

-"So kind."

-"Not really, one day I insulted a game master."

-"Oooh, a gangster among us?"

-"Never, besides, you'd arrest me, wouldn't you?"

-The ellipses seemed to linger.

-"I wouldn't mind."

-Oh.

-"I don't want to end up in a secret government cave."

-"Caves are old school, we have containers now."

-"I don't know if you're joking."

-"Classified."

-"Gaz…"

-"I'll keep the secret, I think you won't have a choice but to be arrested by me someday."

-"… it won't happen."

-"Why?"

-"I haven't committed any crimes."

-"Not even indecent exposure? I thought you were 45 years old and hiding in bushes naked."

-"For that, I'd have to leave my house."

-"Quite the homebody?"

-"You could say."

-"I'm the same, I don't like going out much."

-It's different. I didn't know what to add, so I let him continue the conversation.

-----------------------------

-"Still into your nerd stuff?"

-Gaz looked up at Soap.

-"It's not nerd stuff." Gaz said.

-"Dragon, princess, elf, discord all mixed together. It's nerd stuff. "Ghost replied

-"Dressing up as a skeleton at Hot Topic too, L.t."

-"Ooh, I wouldn't have liked that. "Soap laughed. "But seriously, don't you think about doing it for real? I mean, gathering around a table."

-"They think about it, but we all live in different parts of the world."

-But it would be amazing. Maybe he could even hear Silent's voice, see them…

-"Hm." Johnny said with a smirk

-"What?"

-"It sounds like you have someone in mind."

-"I don't have anyone in mind."

-"Not even an elf you get along with, Garrick?" Ghost retorted

-"I- we're a duo, it

-"It's different."

-"I mean it, we just get along."

-"So if you check discord in a military bar at 11 p.m., it's not to reply to him second by second?"

-"Shut up," Gaz said as the two laughed.

__________________________

-"You're not participating anymore?"

-I ignored his message.

-Three months.

-Three long months of descent, of confinement, of discomfort, of crises.

-Everything was too much.

-Crowds, outside, errands, people.

-My lungs constricted at the thought of meeting someone's gaze. My eyes avoided every contact. My lips were dry from lack of words.

-"I admit that campaigns suck without you," he had written.

-That was two weeks ago.

-"I refused to play with Théo, he wanted to take your place," he had sent.

-That was three months ago.

-"The office GIF."

-Three weeks.

-He… Gaz had never stopped.

-No matter the views, the winds, his boldness didn't stop.

-I was confused.

-Usually, people quit after a month.

-They had better things to do, and I understood. The burden of my social anxiety was mine and shouldn't inconvenience them.

-So why was Gaz standing there carrying this burden unknowingly? Coming back every day, bearing a heavier load…

-"hey."

-Three letters.

-Too short.

-Too dry.

-"Sorry." I continued.

-For what?

-I didn't deserve his forgiveness, I knew it.

-"Glad to see you're back :)" he replied.

-A tear rolled down my cheek.

-"thank you." I replied by text.

-For staying.

-For not asking questions.

-For welcoming me.

______________

-"Sorry, I was at the hospital, do you think I can join the campaign or not?" he had sent.

-My eyebrows raised.

-"No. Wait, you're just out of the hospital and your concern is DnD?"

-"I should really stay by my favorite elf's side."

-"Gaz, seriously, are you okay?"

-"Fractured ribs."

-"Ouch."

-"Broken arm."

-"Wait, what—"

-"And a bullet in the thigh."

-"Wtf."

-"But I'm fine."

-"No."

-"I assure you, I've had worse."

-"And???? You need to rest, not focus on rolling dice to defeat Mindflyers."

-"…but I have no distractions."

-"I'm here."

-"You're in the campaign."

-"No."

-"Wait, what—"

-"I- I saw you were absent so I didn't…join that one."

-"But you only play on that day."

-"I know. But it's not the same without you."

-I didn't know he was currently smiling like an idiot.

-"Thanks, Silent."

-"No worries. Besides, I was also coming out of the hospital."

-"WHAT?! Why didn't you start with that?!"

-"It's ridiculous."

-"No, are you okay?"

-"It's awkward."

-"Oh, serious awkward or-?"

-"No, I'm used to it. I- I took the tram and I couldn't handle it, the crowd was too big, I passed out inconveniencing a hundred people, embarrassing."

-"That's not embarrassing."

-"Yes, I made people late, Gaz."

-"And??? It was for your health."

-"No, I should've known I couldn't handle taking the tram. It's been two years since I couldn't do it, I shouldn't have tried again."

-"Two years?"

-Shit. I said too much.

-"Forget that."

-"Wait, no. You help distract me when I'm on base, I can listen to you in return :)! "

-"There's nothing to say, I don't handle social stuff, that's all."

-"So, your mic, that's it?"

-"Yes."

-"My sister has it too."

-"Has what?"

-"Social anxiety."

-"I see."

-"I know it's different for everyone, but don't give up. Honestly, it's a huge step, right? Taking the tram after two years. Surely you wouldn't succeed all at once, I mean it's like rolling a 20-sided die hoping for a 35."

-I snorted.

-"Nerd."

-"You're a nerd too, Silent."

-"yes, I- I just thought I could succeed, tell myself I could do it."

-"You did it."

-"I passed out."

-"So what? next time can't be worse."

-"Yes, if I have another one."

-"Then you'll have another one, I'm sure you'll manage. Look, I can even show you a tutorial."

-I furrowed my brows and saw a video. A man in an apartment, a cast on one arm, his face cut off from the frame.

-"Quick tutorial for falling on a tram. So lesson 1, stand next to a tall person. We want a good pillow when we fall, so tall people are perfect. Then manage the fall. Fall on the person, not forward. We want to avoid a bloody nose. Especially if there are vampires on the horizon." Gaz said in the video.

-He lay on the ground pretending to fall.

-"Step three, play dead to see sexy firefighters and avoid stares, and step 4 get taken home while flexing in the truck."

-I snorted.

-"Wow, thanks for the tutorial."

-"I know, I know. Passing out pro here."

-"Do you often fall on fridges?"

-"Hm, considering the build of my colleagues, you could say that."

-"Are they as tall and wide as a fridge?"

-"My L.T. yes. With Soap, we even thought he was an android, I mean it's not human to be that built."

-"You look fit too."

-"Oh, a compliment?"

-"Gaz, I-"

-"But yes, honestly, I try to do his routine but I think his genetics play a big part."

-"Shame, no Fridge Gaz then."

-"No, you'll have to settle for Normal Gaz."

-A smile slowly spread across my face.

-"Thanks for the video, it was funny."

-"You're welcome. Plus, if I can flex with my favorite elf."

-"I'm not an elf."

-"Nothing proves me wrong."

-"Gaaaaaazzzz"

____________________________

-"Who are you posing for? "

-"No one."

-" So shirtless, sunlight, flexed arms for no one? Damn, don't tell me it's for your mom. "

-"SOAP!"

-" I'm just asking, man."

-" It's for Silent. "

-"Oh, your magical voiceless elf."

-" It's not— "

-"Yes, yes, not a magical elf, I know, no need to give me another DnD lecture."

-Gaz sighed.

-His selfie was good.

-Shirtless, in the sand, sun rising.

-He looked good.

-But he was nervous.

-What if it was too much?

-After all, this little game of sending each other sunrises or sunsets had started by chance.

-Silent had told him the view was beautiful and sent him a sunset from their window.

-Gaz replied with one from Las Almas, and eventually whenever he went to a new country, he would send a photo.

-But now… maybe it was too much?

-Sending his face.

-Price would kill him.

-But he wanted to progress the relationship.

-Maybe his face could appeal to Silent, they would send him a voice note or even a selfie back?

-"Is this too much? "

-"Hm? "Soap asked confused.

-"This photo, is it too much? "

-"For a thirst trap?"

-" To say hello."

-" It depends on the hello. "

-"Hello as in "I'm showing you my face for the first time." "

-"Oh, maybe. I thought it was a "hello, did you sleep well because look what I could bring to your bed" kind of thing. …But if I received this photo, I'd be happy. "

-"Soap. "

-"I mean, man, you're handsome."

-" Soap. "

-"Plus, who would say no to your abs? "

-"No need to- you know what, I'll send it. "

-"Also, you—"

-Gaz ignored him and sent it.

-Damn, he hoped everything would be fine.

________________________

-Beautiful.

-Too beautiful.

-My eyes scanned that smile not knowing what to do.

- How could someone like that end up playing DnD?

-I closed the conversation.

-I am…. Out of his league.

-So much.

-I could barely bring myself to look at my mirror.

-I knew what I would see there.

- My rolls, my thighs, my stretch marks, my horrible hair, this disproportionate face.

-I'm not ugly.

- But I'm not…I'm not like him

-. I'm the second choice, I'm aware of that.

-I don't get free compliments.

- Nobody turns back to look at me. I'm just…there.

-And him.

- He seemed so radiant, so kind. Damn, I wasted his time.

__________________________

-"So? " Soap asked

-"It's been two weeks with no response."

-" Ouch. "

-"It's not— Sometimes it happens, I think they are doubting."

-" Doubting what? "

-"Themselves. They…before every message, they take 5 minutes to rewrite it, every syllable is thought out and then I send this out of nowhere, I didn't handle it well."

-" You couldn't have known, Kyle. "

-"Yes. YES, I could and I messed up. They told me about their anxiety and then I send them a half-naked photo when I've never even heard their voice. "

-"Try to talk to them then. hmph."

_____________________

-"hey."

-My eyes hesitated.

-"hey." I finally replied

-" For the selfie, I can explain. "

-"No, I- it's not your fault."

-" Yes, honestly, I screwed up" he texted back

-". No, I've been looping again. "

-"You- "

-"seeing you, it was…good, really, but too good." I answered.

-" Too good?"

-"I feel- Illegitimate to talk to you. "

-"what- "

-"You're so- beautiful, and smiling and nice, and the only thing I do is disappear for days and turn up out of the blue. I-"

-" And it's okay, we talked about it." he said.

-" But you deserve better as friends."

-" I decide what I deserve, Silent. And no one beats you. "

-"…I- I don't know what to say. "

-"Send me your sunset :) I haven't had mine."

-Damn. A tear rolled down and I took my phone and sent my sunset. How can someone be so adorable?

-"Perfect." he replied

_________________

-He had continued to send his face on the sunsets. It was stupid, but I waited every time he could and I rewatched them.

-However, it had been three months of silence. I wasn't worried, he was probably on a mission somewhere.

-By a stroke of courage, I had put my phone down to take a photo with the sunset.

-He wouldn't see it. I would delete it.

-But for a moment, I felt beautiful. The sunlight on me warmed me, my outfit was cute, my curves were beautiful.

-I sent it. I would delete it tomorrow. After all, Kyle had said it could last four months.

___________

-"Hey, everything alright, mate?"

-"They're amazing."

-"Lasswell or tony ? For Lasswell of course, why do you think her wife is—"

-"Look."

-Soap raised an eyebrow and glanced at Kyle's phone.

-"Oh, oh."

-Kyle couldn't tear his eyes away from his screen

-. During the mission return, he had picked up his phone and seen a notification. Clicking out of habit, he saw it.

-their smile, their hair, their body. My god.

-"Lucky bastard." Soap said.

-They were perfect. And their belly, their hips, everything was beautiful. Kyle had always preferred curvy people, it was a fact.

-Sure, he had imagined that silently they could be one, but the fact that it was true… It filled his heart with joy.

-"They… damn. "he murmured, zooming in on every detail.

-Mole or freckle, he observed every pixel.

_____________________

-"So the elf wasn't the only one sexy." he texted.

-I raised an eyebrow at the notification as I woke up.

-"Hm?"

-"The photo. "he replied.

-Oh fuck.

-"You saw it?"

-"Yes, I shouldn't have?"

-"I thought of deleting it before, I—"

-"Oh."

-"But did you like it?"

-"Yes. you— I— honestly, I can't stop looking at it. you look radiant."

-He was lying. -No?

-"And that outfit is amazing on you, really."

-It hugs everything, why… why is he complimenting that?

-Usually, people say "those jeans make you look thinner than you are" "you look better in loose clothes" "hide your rolls".

-"Thank you."

-" I have to admit I'm so relieved. I mean if you ended up being a 40-year-old, I wouldn't have been so confident I think."

-"Oh really, wrinkles and gray hair aren't your thing?"

-"No, I'm more into curves and people my age."

-"Damn, I was about to confess that I was 70 years old". I joked.

-"I can make exceptions, but only for elves."

-"I'm lucky then."

-"Very. I— I hope to have more, or occasionally."

-"Of?"

-"Photos of you, it's more beautiful than a sunset."

"-oh."

-A warmth spread to my cheeks, a smile settling in.

-"ok."

-"ok?"

-"Okay."

___________________

-"Do you think I'll hear your voice someday?"

-It was late, or early for him and late for me.

-"I don't know."

-showing my face in a photo…

-I could control that, take back the photo, delete it, edit it. But talking…

-Talking is taking up space.

-"I imagine it smooth."

-"My voice?"

-"Hm, like a stream, it rocks slowly."

-"I might have a smoker's voice."

-"That would suit you too."

-"Maybe one day then."

-"I'm looking forward to that."

_____________________

-Those were the last words sent from him.

-No more contact.

-His absence wasn't due to missions, he had confessed to me that he was off the day before.

-So he had decided to stop.

-I tried to find excuses, before accepting the reality of it.

-Days passed and I hoped he would come back.

-Maybe he was like me, needing time to recover.

-Maybe he was hurt.

-Everything was silent.

-When four months had finally passed, I understood.

-He had grown tired of the silence. I held back a sob and closed the discussion.

-A stab wound would have been better I think.

-To ease the constant pain and intense questions in my mind.

-What had I done wrong? Was I too much? Did I ask the wrong question? Should I have kept quiet?

-Everything was spinning and I finally closed the app. damn.

_____________________________

-My feet led me to the publishing house.

-Today I had to make the final corrections for Madame Lasswell before her vacation with her wife Kate.

-Hesitant, I knocked on her door.

-An "enter" was heard and I entered the already crowded room.

- A mustached man in a beanie, a masked man, a mullet, Kate, and Gaz were watching me.

-My eyes betrayed my surprise at his presence. What was he doing here? Why now? How should I react?

-"Y/n, sorry for the crowd. I guess you have it."

-"Yes ma'am."

-My voice barely above a whisper was usual for Jocelyn. I handed her the manuscripts.

-"We're going to drink at the bar downstairs, do you want to come?"

-Come? To a crowded place, surrounded by drunk people, constant noise, blinding lights with the icing on the cake being a guy who blew me off for the year?

-"No, I'm busy tonight, sorry."

-"No problem."

-Slowly my heels turned, I took the elevator but I heard footsteps. Kyle was with me.

-"I was on a mission."

-"hm."

-"I know I told you no, but he… there were quite a few problems and I had to leave, I didn't have time to warn you, it dragged on, Ghost broke my phone by sitting on it with his stupid hard ass, and we just got back from the airport actually. Lasswell, Kate finally— she works with us so that's why I'm here"

-A silence stretched, he took a breath.

-"you didn't have to explain… I mean after the word mission, I understood I was wrong."

-"I wanted to be clear."

-"I should have asked and sent you messages."

-"No, it's okay, it must have seemed suspicious. I ask for your voice, you say no, and I disappear. The conclusion was logical."

-"but it wasn't the right one."

-"It's okay, we're here, aren't we?"

-"yes."

-The elevator rang, the door opened. Hesitant, I watched him.

-"I love it." -"hm?"

-"your voice."

-"Oh."

-"I… you're really busy tonight or…"

-"No, I just don't like…"

-"The crowd."he guessed

-"Hm."

-"I— I can invite you for dinner? At my place, we'll grab takeout, no crowds, no one to see us."

-"That sounds like the pitch of a serial killer."

-He widened his eyes. I snorted.

-"Okay, you got me." he chuckled.

-" At your place sounds good. Better than a restaurant." I admitted.

-"Cool, so…"

-"Shall we go then, yes". I murmured as he finally released the elevator button and we stepped out of the elevator.

_________________

-At his place, everything was calm.

-Not me.

-How should I stand? Too close? Too far? What to talk about? And what if I'm boring in the end? What to order? Does he like seafood or is he allergic? My eyes focused on every detail and…

-Everything's fine.

-His hand on mine, he took the initiative for the restaurant to order, asking me my preferences, and we waited for the delivery guy.

-Slowly, he asked questions about my work. I mastered it.

-And slowly everything unfolded naturally.

-Sitting on his couch, his hand not letting go of mine, he drew circles with his thumb while talking.

-I liked that. In groups, I liked… listening.

-People like to talk about themselves and I like listening to that, not participating, and Gaz understood that in such an impressive way.

-Occasionally, he asked questions in return, gauging my desire to speak, I answered and this back and forth held until the food arrived.

-Maybe everything would turn out for the best.

-Standing in front of his door, I didn't know what to add to this evening.

-A not-so-stranger, three years of virtual chat and now I was unable to figure out the right goodbye on his doorstep.

-Hesitant, we observed each other.

-"I hope we'll do this again."

-"Yes. "I replied.

-He stepped forward.

-I remained still, his face close to mine. -Kiss? Cheek? Goodbye? Whisper? -Which action would he choose? -I wished for a dice to decide, a title, or a "Gaz approves".

-"May I?"

-Oh. -I nodded. -His hands on my hips, he placed a brief kiss on my lips. -"I'm glad we managed to break the silence." -"me too."

-Perhaps, after all, I wouldn't return to my solitary silence tonight. His hands guiding me back to his apartment and the door closing behind us.

-I could easily guess that a die had just been thrown for a long evening and we both seemed to have the right score.

If you want more my COD Masterlist

#cod x reader #kyle gaz garrick x reader #gaz x reader #kyle garrick x reader #kyle gaz garrick x plus size reader #cod x plus size reader

[elleloquently]

invisible string [7] : ellie williams

part six

| college!ellie x female!reader - after suffering several rewrites, part seven is finally here! a huge thank you to everyone who has been so patient and supportive <3 also, i know it's typical to post the tag list at the top but there were quite a few people so it's at the bottom instead, sorry abt that! this part is a lil different so im kinda nervous hahahaha

| c/w - anxiety

your body carried you down the familiar path to class, but your mind felt absent.

you got there early, habit, but paced around in the cold until the very last minute. you knew ellie would be there, her habit - apparently, sitting and waiting in the seat next to yours and you felt unable to face her.

either you didn't truly know why you felt that way, or you were clinging onto the last dwindling thread of delusion that your mind allowed.

you liked ellie. you really liked ellie. and ellie... 'liked' you... too?

the minutes ticked by quicker than you could gather your thoughts and you made a break for the classroom, your fingers turned red from clutching onto your cold drink so tightly.

you were preoccupied and you had hardly even drank any of it. you frowned at your useless purchase. the ice was melting and the sight looked off-putting, but your stomach was hurting too much anyway to try and make it worthwhile with one last sip.

your idea to throw it away upon entering the classroom was short lived, as the professor was standing in the front of the room and you didn't want to cross the front to throw away your practically full beverage.

it sloshed in the cup and you winced, imagining your own stomach as it twisted.

ellie glanced up as you came around to your seat and the crease on her forehead disappeared immediately as her eyes landed on you. the idea of keeping a secret made you feel dirty, but you weren't sure if you were even actually keeping one.

"was worried you weren't coming or something," ellie muttered, glancing over as you claimed your spot next to her.

you smiled but didn't meet her eyes. the feeling of your heartbeat pounding in your ears was overwhelming.

"are you okay?" ellie asked, her voice a low whisper as she studied your expression.

you tried to focus instead on your notebook and laptop. you didn't want to be rude and you definitely found it difficult to resist ellie when she was staring at you like that, but you needed to clear your head. the idea of clearing your head sounded ridiculous though, and you thought maybe you hadn't had a clear head since the first day that ellie decided to speak to you in class.

ellie tapped her pen on your desk and you jumped, realizing too many seconds had gone by and you still didn't answer her question.

"i'm good. just stressed, i think," you responded, not totally lying but not completely telling the truth, either.

you hoped your answer was enough to hold ellie over at least until class was finished, your professor seemed grumpy lately and you didn't want to subject yourself to an in-class call out.

ellie sighed and sank down in her chair, physically pulling away from you. your heart ached while you watched, suddenly wanting to tell her everything. a frown was etched onto her lips and you wanted to swipe it away.

throughout class, you spent more time watching ellie take notes than taking notes of your own. halfway through it seemed as though ellie gave up too, because she started doodling over her written words. you glanced over often, not trying to be sneaky because you didn't particularly mind if ellie caught you. if she did catch you, she would only grin and carry on anyway.

the ice melted quicker in the warm classroom, the condensation relentless and a small pool was beginning to form around the bottom of your cup. you quickly wiped it away with your sleeve, face burning. the patheticness of the remaining drink was taunting, beads of water slipping and threatened to dampen the corner of your notes.

it felt like a token of your anxiety, the way you couldn't stop it.

ellie had been watching but you didn't notice, until a very pointed "dude" left her mouth. you turned to face her, pausing the action of wiping off the cup with your sleeve over your hand,

"are you done with that?" ellie asked, to which you nodded weakly.

"you don't want it anymore?" she rephrased, wanting to be sure with confirmation.

"i do not want it," you whispered back, setting your eyes on the drink that's caused you too much trouble in such a short amount of time. you glared at it and ellie raised an eyebrow, trying not to smile. she reached her arm out, and it took you just a moment to understand what she wanted.

you handed ellie the cup, not really seeing the appeal in the drink anymore but decided there was no harm if ellie wanted it. instead, she surprised you by standing up from her chair, drink in hand. she swiftly and quietly moved to the front of the room, throwing it away and returning to her spot without a word.

oh. problem solved.

the evidence from your moment with dina and jesse, gone.

ellie didn't give it a second thought, but you replayed it in your mind over and over until the lecture was finished.

“so, should we hit the dining hall or do you wanna just go back to my dorm?”

ellie posed the question with such a casual confidence that it caught you off guard, the pen you were putting away nearly slipping through your fingers.

“oh,” you winced, and immediately knew how bad your reaction was.

“oh,” ellie copied with a dry laugh. “it’s okay, we don’t have to do anything.”

“no,” you quickly rushed out, not wanting to make her feel bad but you did have another class. “it’s just, homework.” you tried to explain.

“it’s okay,” ellie repeated, fidgeting with her hands.

“i’m sorry…” you smiled sadly, unsure if you should hold eye contact or keep packing up. ellie looked away, straightening her shoulders as she hoisted up her bag. you copied her action, guilt filling up inside of you.

you felt conflicted but were left with no choice, unable to soothe your guilty conscious.

ellie quickly recovered however, and an easy smile graced her lips as she bid you a goodbye.

“okay, I guess i’ll go back to my room alone,” she complained, giving you a pointed look.

you pushed out a laugh, amused by ellie’s tone but you felt defeated.

"i'd come with you if i could," you said honestly.

ellie dropped her exaggerated expression and met your eyes. "i know," she said.

your heart jumped and you had to leave, before weeks worth of confessions left the tip of your tongue. "text me, okay?" you said, trying really hard to force your voice not to wobble.

"always," ellie replied, raising her hand to wave bye as you finally parted ways.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

you didn’t mean to ignore ellie.

with finals only a week away, it wasn't exactly easy to find agreeable times to hang out, no matter how badly you wanted it.

you had felt bad, regretfully declining when ellie asked you to hang out after your shared class. the burden of homework was holding you tightly in its grasp... though you would've had no problem doing homework with ellie.

you did have homework. it was just after your class. the class that ellie had no idea of you having, since you had originally told her that you were free that hour simply because you wanted to have lunch with her. you certainly didn't regret that day, but you felt a little awkward about the idea of finally coming clean now.

so, you told ellie that you had too much homework, and tried to ignore the dejected face that ellie failed to mask at your response.

you hadn't told her about your run in with her friends, either. if dina and jesse wanted ellie to know that you had run into them, they could tell her. you hardly knew them, anyway. the idea of making them a conversation topic felt strange.

that was monday, when you completely blew off ellie except not really because you seriously had a class so you aren't sure why you feel as though you've transformed into a total liar.

you had texted since then, just a little, unable to sense the difference between friendly friend texts and friendly flirty texts.

someone that ellie likes.

someone that ellie likes likes likes someone that ellie likes ellie likes-

you reached for your phone on your bed, forcibly silencing your inner monologue.

hey, are you still free to hang out today?|

you stared blankly down at your screen before rapidly deleting the drafted text, letter by letter.

hey ): i don't think i'm gonna be free to hang out today|

you squinted at the screen until the words looked fuzzy. when you opened your eyes normally again, the text didn't look any more appealing. you huffed and deleted that one too, tossing your phone as far away as you could without dropping it off of the end of your bed.

you had said no to ellie last. she was probably waiting on you to make the next move... how would she feel if you just... didn't?

unless she was totally normal, going about her day and being busy and most definitely not waiting to hear from you.

someone that ellie likes.

yeah, that's... normal. right? right?

you decided that maybe you needed to study a little harder in your psychology class, because you couldn't decipher whether or not it was a logical thing to get caught up on or if you were just going totally crazy. running yourself delusional? likely.

being around ellie and pining after her felt much more appealing when there wasn't a possibility that she could like you back.

you desperately wished to backtrack but yet, there wasn't really much that changed, was there? just one silly little sentence... one that you were probably misinterpreting anyway.

the thought kept you busy on tuesday, though for once you were able to throw yourself into your studies as a distraction instead of being distracted away from your studies. you didn't reach out to ellie, and no new messages came. you didn't hang out that day.

wednesday was your last actual day of class, the last class before finals began.

it quickly dawned on you that it was your last guaranteed time to see ellie. the idea of not being able to sit next to her in class anymore was all that you needed to adjust your priorities for the time being.

you were determined to be in a good mood, determined to make the most of your 'last' but not really last day with ellie.

while getting ready, you were very much aware of the anxiety picking away at your brain, posing you a million questions that you didn't have the answer to. you compensated by carefully picking out an outfit, taking extra time to prepare for the day to make sure you felt as good as possible. all the while, an aggravating dark cloud loomed above you despite your rejection of it. you smoothed down your top in the mirror, ignoring the way that your hands were shaking.

it seems to be a case where every time you are specifically set on having a good day, you end up having one of your worst days.

by the time you left for class, your stomach was hurting. it wasn't a new sensation, the way the uneasiness built up and felt as though it was pricking away at your insides... but it wasn't on par with your idea of a good day.

the wind felt overstimulating and perhaps your last straw was when you were walking behind someone to get into the building, and you know for a fact that they saw you because you made eye contact, but they didn't hold the door open for you and it nearly slammed in your face.

you felt like a laughable character, the way that tears welled up in your eyes as defeat swallowed your previous optimistic determination.

face hot and rapidly blinking, maybe your final final straw was ellie, who was already sat and almost immediately raised her eyes to look as you entered the classroom.

"no melty drink today?" she questioned teasingly, though dropped her tone as concern washed over her once realizing your state.

"what's wrong?" she quickly replaced, leaning into you so her voice could be hushed.

you could've laughed at her question and you nearly did, because sincerely, what was even wrong? you couldn't think of one valid explanation on the spot, and the real reason was enough to bring back the tears that you had desperately wiped away outside of the door.

but it was ellie, so you spoke anyway.

"just wanted to have a good day," you admitted, instantly hating how pathetic your voice sounded.

"and it's not a good day?"

you shook your head, finding yourself wanting to confide in her about everything. you should've hung out with her yesterday.

"wanna come over after class? talk about it? make it better?"

ellie presented the offer so casually, so immediately that it almost made you feel worse. you wanted to say yes.

"i can't," you forced, and ellie's eyebrows knitted together.

"that's okay," ellie said, but it came out a little too quickly.

you didn't want it to be okay. you wanted her to be annoyed or upset that you hadn't been hanging out with her and the worst part was that it seemed like she did feel that way, maybe deep down, but she wasn't openly expressing it whatsoever.

you frowned and it was difficult to find any mental footing with rational thought. you were not entitled to her greater emotions simply because she liked you. as a friend.

"is it okay?" you questioned, a little too sharp and it was embarrassing.

"yes...?" ellie's eyes darted over your face in confusion.

"sorry," you breathed, forcing a reality check. "i just... feel bad."

"don't you always?" ellie retorted, and it wasn't supposed to hurt but it did.

"what?" you were taken aback and ellie focused elsewhere, no longer looking at you.

"nothing. you just... you say you feel bad when we hang out but now you're saying you feel bad if we don't."

her response made you furrow your eyebrows but you really wanted to crawl in-word, not realizing how strongly ellie had picked up on your habit of feeling.

"yeah, 'cause i-" you started, but ellie shook her head.

"it's fine. you don't have to make up an excuse or... really. don't feel bad."

it's not that easy.

ellie smiled but you wished that she didn't because it was obvious that it was forced. the reaction made you wonder if there was something going on with ellie too, or if you were just actually bothering her.

you opened your mouth to speak but your professor initiated the start of class, review questions instantly rolling in. ellie sat hunched over her notebook, which sparked an idea.

you leaned over and began rummaging through your bag until you felt a small pad of paper in your grasp. you stole ellie's pen from her desk and she watched but pretended not to care.

on a blue sticky note, you drew something simple. a little doodle of a planet like you had done before, and a couple of stars. you felt silly and a little bit stupid but you pressed the post it onto ellie's desk, along with her pen.

you could see ellie contemplate whether or not she should show that she noticed it, and you had to press the back of your hand to your mouth so that you didn't release a laugh. you didn't watch her and decided to instead focus on your review, giving ellie 'space' to decide what she wanted to do.

a few minutes ticked away until the little blue square and pen reappeared on your desk. ellie's addition included her own planet, and a few stars mixed in with yours. you felt better, more capable, and raised your eyes to look at her.

ellie didn't have the time to pretend like she wasn't watching you. your lips slipped into a smile that ellie matched, leaving you to feel okay enough to focus on the review without worrying.

at the dismissal of class, you felt strangely sentimental. you packed up quickly so you could leave at the same time as ellie but she was hesitating at her desk, waiting for you.

"can i keep it?" she asked, glancing to the sticky note that you held delicately in your hand. it was sweet and you automatically handed it over, wondering if she was going to put that one on her wall too. you hoped that she would.

"are you going back to your room?" you questioned softly. ellie held the door open for you as you left the classroom.

"yeah," she answered with a heavy sigh.

you had a bit of time before your next class, about an hour to try and turn your situation around.

"ellie?" you started, walking shoulder to shoulder throughout the hallway. she looked at you in concern, eyebrows drawing together in anticipation.

"i wasn't making up excuses. i do feel bad if i can't hang out because... because i do like hanging out, so-"

"it's alright," ellie interrupted, though her voice was softer than before.

you nodded and carefully continued on. "i don't mean to always feel bad, i swear. it just... happens. and then i feel bad for feeling bad and it's just so...ridiculous. do i sound ridiculous?" you conclude with a frustrated laugh.

"maybe a little," ellie contemplated, but you could tell that she was teasing again by the way that she moved her head, as if she's mentally debating with herself. "but i get it. seriously, you're fine. i like hanging out with you too so you don't... have to worry."

she tentatively reassured you and joked instead of outwardly apologizing, and you wondered where she got that from. you're grateful anyway and relieved, but roll your eyes playfully at her sincerity. inward, your stomach is doing flips.

like like like.

that word is being used entirely too much lately.

"i ran into your friends the other day," you mention, hoping that it sounded casually enough. "dina and jesse?"

"oh yeah?" ellie laughs, but her hand fidgets with her sleeve.

"they seem really nice... it's lucky, to have friends like that, you know?"

ellie nodded, smiling knowingly. it felt like a safe topic, so you continued on.

"i didn't know if they mentioned it... i'm sure they were just being polite but they invited me to lunch. it was just nice of them to offer anyway... said it was nice to meet someone that you liked, they're friendly. i just hope i didn't seem completely rude, i was sort of running late so i couldn't talk long but... how long have you guys known each other?"

your cheeks grew warm as you rambled so you stopped yourself, looking to ellie instead. the smile had left her face and she stared straight ahead. she looked pale, a white cast replacing the usual pink warmth on her cheeks.

"i'm sorry," you quickly rushed, not knowing what you were apologizing for.

"don't be," ellie stated, but her words were short.

"did i say something...?"

ellie blinked and faced you. "no, you didn't say anything."

you breathed a sigh of relief, but still didn't want to toe a cautious line. it was too much, too quickly, and you weren't good at making things sound casual like ellie usually seemed to be.

"is that all they said?" ellie questioned, and you quickly nodded.

"yeah. yeah, it was short. i had class. it was on monday morning," you clarify.

"oh," ellie realized, as if she had managed to find a missing puzzle piece. "did they say something?" she rephrased, coughing out a laugh.

"it was super quick," you reiterated, but your heart was racing.

"okay. i just thought maybe... you seemed weird on monday. maybe they said something stupid," ellie said, but you could tell she was still thinking it over. maybe that was your sign, really the only clue you needed after all. ellie actually looked stressed though, and you wished that you hadn't brought it up at all.

"weird?" you tried to sound surprised, but you knew exactly what she was referring to and why you had been that way. "not weird... just stressed. i have so much to do, i know you do too," you tried, attempting to smooth over the awkwardness.

"was it because i just assumed we were going to hang out?" ellie mumbled, sounding accusatory yet upset with only herself.

"ellie, no." your palms were beginning to feel too warm but you wrapped them into your sleeves anyway. "i like hanging out with you."

like like like!

you continued, grasping for straws and desperately wishing that dina had never called your name. "i've sorta been spending more time with you than my homework," you laughed carefully. "i like it, don't get me wrong. i just had... you know, school."

ellie nodded but she wasn't listening, not really.

“i didn’t mean to freak you out,” ellie said, her tone slightly defensive.

your jaw dropped in surprise and you felt as though your head was spinning. "what?" you asked, genuinely confused. you weren't sure exactly what illiciated the response, either you actually blindly said something stupid or you were blindly unaware of ellie's feelings.

the conversation was going nowhere, quickly. you were speaking but not listening, both absorbed in your own feelings to the point of ignorance.

"ellie, we're fine," and despite the circumstance you selfishly loved the excuse to let her name roll off of your tongue. you halted to a stop as the hallway came to an end, not truly ready to part ways.

ellie stood still for a moment and you wondered if she was gathering her thoughts until she finally spoke again. "of course we're fine," she concluded. she didn't meet your eyes and you deflated for what felt like the hundredth time that day.

"hey," you started again, another failed attempt to fix the conversation.

"it's okay," ellie breezed past you. "i know you're busy, i'll see you later, alright?"

she didn't give you a second to respond before she was out of the doors and out of the building. you were left standing there, mouth agape and head reeling.

there was too much to confuse, too much to get wrong and you found it difficult to differentiate a good start from a bad end.

you wouldn't get to just see her next class, and it felt like your last opportunity had truly been your last opportunity.

you went to your next class but you weren't really present, not with ellie on your mind and every wrong step that had been taken. it hadn't even been a full confession and it went wrong. maybe you had gotten it all wrong, or maybe you were both dancing around your own feelings, destined to screw it all up.

[ part eight ]

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

tags :

@pinkfillerose @whore-era @lilisvlibrary @elliefilms @whteflwcrs @jasontoddsdreamgirl @icedcold @sarahsmileslikesarahd0esntcare @evanpetersluver @muthafuckingstargirl @pctcr @illicitghosts @mell0w-mushr00m @queen-arya22 @deafelliewilliams @urmyheartshaka @yourfrenchteacher @me-and-your-husband @blairfox04

#ellie williams x reader #ellie williams x female reader #ellie williams x you #ellie williams college au #ellie tlou x reader #ellie williams fanfic #ellie tlou x female reader

[icypenguin]

genshin men Xiao, Neuvillette, Alhaitham, Wriothesley, (sperate) x y/n??

How about them meeting a teen (14 -16) y/n who is like Kairi from kingdom hearts and always saw how they always kept a diary with them full of writing and some small doodles??

(this is platonic ofc I RLLY wanted to see their interactions with Kairi from kingdom hearts also I would search her personality because I don't know how to describe it sorry!! 😭😭)

★~ Words and doodles!

HELLO ANON, OFCOURSEE I’LL BE HAPPY TO!!!!! I HOPE I GOT KAIRI’S PERSONALITY RIGHT… but anyway i hope you’ll like it so please enjoyyyyy!

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

★~ Xiao: you accidentally bumped on him while rushing to get the new limited edition sticker collection! he’ll be quite grumpy but he doesn’t really care about it anyway (mehhh). “oh! sorry sir, here you could have this doodle i did earlier! byebye!” you gave him a sticker as an apologize. he only stood there, not knowing what to say. the second time you met eachother is when he was strolling around at a park and you were doodling and writing in your diary. he noticed you but he pays no mind. but ofcourse, you noticed him and walked to him. you were very sorry for that incident so why not offer him a doodle? “hey, sir! i’m really sorry for our past events. as an apology… let me doodle you!” “uh.. i- um.. sure?” he was quite confused ofcourse. but after 5 minutes he was happy to see your doodle of him smiling and not have a grumpy face.

★~ Neuvillette: he was you wondering through fontaine a couple of times always holding that precious diary of yours. he was going to work, he stumbled upon a familiar diary. as he thought of it again, he remembered you. he bet you were looking all over fontaine for your diary. he took it and took a great peek inside. he saw your variations of doodles and writings. he was amazed by your style, well he’s never seen something like this on the newspaper. as he continued walking, he saw you asking everyone in the street about your missing diary. then, it was his turn to be asked “hello, chief of justice! have you seen a diary that i always carry around? please tell me you’ve seen it!”. your worried expression faded as he pulled out your diary. “i believe this is what you’re talking about?” he handed you the diary. “yes! thankyou sir! thankyou thankyou! how can i repay you?” you took the notebook and hold it close. “well.. i took a peek of your diary and your writing amazed me. perhaps you could write a biography of me?” “ofcourse! i’d be happy to”. you wrote him a biography and made some doodles of him. he was delighted to see the results. he’ll be sure to hire you as his assistant someday.

★~ Alhaitham: he’ll be.. i guess pretty interested in a girl always bringing around her diary? well, he does like books and writing. as you were exploring sumeru city, a page from your diary fell. al-haitham was the first one to notice. he took it and read the page about your day with a doodle of a spinocrocodile. he tought, perhaps you could be a journalist. he catched up to you and gave you the missing page of your diary. you thanked him and he told you to maybe publish a story in a diary-a-like style about your day that someone will enjoy (if you don’t understand, search up marcy’s journal from amphibia). you thought of the idea and perhaps you should. “well, if you need any help, just find me” he said before he walked away. some weeks later, you passed by him again and took the chance to ask something “h-hey! uh- sir al-haitham, could i ask you something?” “go ahead, i guess it’s about the diary book?” “yes! yes it is”. he invited you for lunch at a café and you asked him multiple questions that he was happy to answer. as time pass, you finished your book with his help and published it. the citizens loved it ofcourse! now, he’s like your mentor. he helped you in any problem you had.

★~ Wriothesley: he would catch you writing in your diary and scribbling doodles with sigewinne every thurday afternoon. sigewinne told him about you too, how you both like to write down what happened in your day and doodle some random things. he was glad that sigewinne was having fun with a friend, it catched his interest. the next time he saw you with sigewinne, he decided to join in. “hey! having a lovely afternoon?” “oh! hello, duke! are you sigewinne’s friend? she told me about you”. he chuckled at your sunny and cheerful personality “yes that is correct, what are you both writing?”. “oh we’re writing how our day went..” sigewinne decided to join in the conversation. he looked to the doodles and writing you both made- and certainly he approved that it is adorable. “hey y/n we should make stickers for the duke!” “oh? you’ll let me do that? awesome!” you and sigewinne started to doodle for the stickers. oh well, i guess wriothesley will have 2x more stickers around his office or in random places.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

THANKYOU FOR READING! ANON, IM SO SORRY IF THIS IS NOT WHAT YOU EXPECTED… BUT I HOPE YOU’RE SATISFIED WITH IT 😞😞😞 ANYWAY THANKYOU FOR THE 300 LIKES ON MY PREVIOUS FANFIC BTW EHHEHEHEHEB HAVE A NICE DAYYYY! ADVICES ARE ACCEPTED, THANKYOUUU!

#genshin impact #genshin x reader #wriothesley x reader #wriothesley x you #genshin wriothesley #alhaitham x reader #alhaitham genshin #alhaitham x you #xiao x reader #xiao genshin impact #xiao x you #neuvillette x reader #neuvillette x you #neuvillette genshin #kairi kingdom hearts

[larvaem1lk]

cookie stand

ellie williams x fem reader <3

🦋 hellooo, this is my first time publishing a fic to tumblr! i’m like really nervous and scared and !!!!!! i wrote this in mid march which was one of my first times writing for the lovely & beautiful ellie, so please forgive me if she’s kind of like. not characterized well. i hope there aren’t any errors & pls forgive my overuse of the words ‘pretty’ and ‘CDs’… i’ve been holding this one out for tooooo long so. please enjoy

🦋 warnings: none really :) there’s cursing and my… no so good writing though… overall this is just cute and ellie is like so nervous because why are u such an angelic being!?!?

other than that, please enjoy & thank u to anyone who reads!! :-* i hope u like it or at least someone out there does. feedback is so appreciated, promise my fics from here will be better <3

It was your scent that first consumed her mind full of wonder… the unfamiliar sweetness filling her nose and leaving her woozy. She didn’t know what it was, or who it was. She just assumed the pretty flowers were emitting nectar to attract insects that she just so smelled, too.

The sky was sunny; the weather was warm, and it was near the middle of spring. Obviously, the blooming flowers would make the most sense. Though she was wrong.

She wasn’t aware of the pretty girl a couple of feet away standing at the cookie stand. She didn’t notice the swarming bundles of children and parents that crowded the tiny baby pink stand, eager to try the sweets. In fact, she wasn’t paying attention to anything else around her.

No, Ellie was only here because Dina said there was supposed to be some guy selling CDs of Ellie’s favorite band that disbanded years ago. She could barely locate any of their music, so this was her only opportunity. Sure, she had the internet, and different media platforms, but that same Dina had bought a boombox for whatever reason and didn’t want it to collect dust. 

So here Ellie sat on a bench, sketchbook in her lap, while she drew random doodles of things around the park near her college—squirrels, butterflies, and dog poop. Or she would scribble random thoughts down, like, “Where are my CDs????” and “Why do dogs squat like that to shit.”

She looked up every few minutes for a sketchy man with a duffel bag, or whoever she thought would have potentially had the stash of CDs.

Yet out of all of the people that walked through, nobody matched the appearance. Maybe she missed them? Was it possible that a group of grannies carried CDs of a long-forgotten band? Or the young moms pushing strollers? She was giving up hope. She almost felt like she had just gotten played.

It wasn’t until she heard your lighthearted giggle in the distance that stopped Ellie from packing up. She looked at the entrance. Nobody. She looked to her right. There you were. A huge smile was on display and your eyes were a bit crinkled. You were squatting to talk with the… many children that surrounded you.

There was confusion at first, her eyebrows pinching inward as she watched you. Were you some type of… teacher? Caregiver? Wait, no. She didn’t even notice the baby pink stand behind you. It looked kind of cute. She squinted, and saw a pear-green sign that read, “HOMEMADE cookies!! $2.50 each… + random FREE CDs! :)”

Hold the fuck on. Random “FREE” CDs? This might just be where she finds the discography of her favorite band. But it was weird, a cookie stand selling random CDs? hell, she didn’t even care at this point. She’s been in need of some music to jam out to while she drew. Plus, she was interested in learning a few on the guitar just for herself.

Without a second thought, Ellie was stuffing her materials into her bag and throwing it over her shoulder as she stomped over to where your stand was. There was a bit of a line between children and parents. She was disappointed to be all the way in the back, but it would be worth it once she got what she was looking for.

Though it wasn’t a guarantee that you’d have what she wanted. She had been to so many music stores, even searching sketchy websites. Everyone told her the band never existed or we haven’t had them in our catalog for years, so how would you be any different? The small bit of hope was starting to fade again, but, she couldn’t say no to a cookie. Plus, you were pretty.

In the meantime, Ellie stood, waiting. She watched insects in the grass, watched people walking, but she was mostly watching you, from the way your eyes crinkle when you smiled too hard or how caring you were towards the children.

The spring sun was shining over your body, your skin glowing under the soft beams. You had such a pretty smile, and your lips looked so soft. They were shiny with gloss and Ellie wet her own with her tongue at the thought of feeling your lips on hers.

You stood behind the stand, talking and laughing with what seemed to be a guy with his younger sibling. You two seemed to be catching up, as the conversation went on for a good 5 minutes. Or maybe he was flirting. Hopefully not.

Ellie laughed when she heard a kid whine about how badly they had to pee and how long the cookie girl was taking, and Ellie silently agreed. The cookie girl was holding everyone up.

Ellie stood in line for a good 10 minutes before she was behind one more parent-kid duo towards the front. She had watched as kids walked away with large chocolate chip cookies while parents reminisced about CDs from their prime.

She watched as you talked to the child and practically made friends with their mom. But then she was next up as she saw the duo disappear.

This is it. Just do it.

With shaky legs, and a quiet exhale, she took a step closer to the stand, and damn, you were even prettier up close. Your eyes were so pretty under the sunlight and and your face was just—pretty. Ellie felt her mouth dry at the sight.

But why at that moment did a breeze have to blow by? That’s when the dangerous smell of sweetness filled her nose again, and she realized she had been mistaken before. Those weren’t flowers, it was you. You were the one with the dreamy aroma engulfing her in your essence. Now that she was closer to you, it was stronger than before.

Lost in your eyes, she didn’t catch the way your mouth moved in a greeting. And the way you smelled wasn’t helping either. Those same eyes filled with kindness were now glazed over with confusion, and it hit Ellie that you were waiting for her response. She blinked and glanced over her shoulder to make sure that nobody was behind her, sighing in relief when she saw no one.

You spoke up again, tilting your head with concern as your expression. “You okay?” You asked and fuck, your voice. It surprised her that she was still standing with how weak her knees felt.

Ellie cleared her throat and nodded, sniffling out of anxiousness but all that did was nearly slip her back into the clouds again. “Yeah, I’m good. I, Sorry, I just—totally blanked out there,”

She was relieved to see you smile in response. She hoped you didn’t think she was weird for staring at you like that, but how could she not when you looked like… you?

Your gaze lingered on Ellie’s face for a little while, taking in the sparkle of her green eyes and the freckles that decorated her cheeks. Under the brightness of the sun, there was a subtle sheen to her auburn-colored hair. You couldn’t lie. She was pretty. Really pretty. You noticed her drawing by a tree not too long ago when you came to set up your stand.

Ellie felt herself get a little warm at the way you were looking at her. Or maybe that was the weather. The forecast said 60, but it felt more like 80.

You looked down at the table and motioned toward two pink plates of large chocolate chip cookies. “How many would you like?” You clasped your hands together before placing them behind your back.

You were so sweet. So nice. The first thing she had done and couldn’t stop doing was stare at you, yet all you did was smile and ask her how many cookies she wanted. You were a dream.

Ellie’s eyes flickered down to the table in front of you to admire the cookies for a second. They were large, perfectly round, and she didn’t want to seem dumb for thinking this, but the chips seemed to be placed perfectly, too. Of course. With everything balanced, they almost looked damn near store-bought. “Are these really homemade?” She looked up with her eyebrows raised and you nodded.

“Yep! You know these were almost a failed batch, but I fixed them last minute. I was so pissed, but the people love ‘em, so I ain’t too mad about it.” You shrugged and Ellie smiled. She loved hearing you talk.

She pulled her lips to the side and fiddled with her fingers before speaking, “Well, I’d love to have one. How much are they?” You leaned forward to tap the pear green sign with your nail. Ellie instantly felt dumb as she read the large bubble letters, $2.50 each…

She mentally face palmed herself. “Oh… yeah, that’s right. Sorry. Again.” You laugh as she digs into her bag to bring out three crumpled sheets of green. “Can never keep track of coins,” her words were in a whisper as she handed you the dollar bills.

She watched your every movement, somehow finding everything you did fascinating. You were like some ethereal being that she’d come across, entrancing her with your mesmerizing aura. She had seen plenty of girls before, able to woo them with her charm and exude such a confidence with ease. But what was it with you?

You folded the dollar bills toward you before sliding them into your pocketbook that sat on top of a large bin beside you. Inside were rows of colorful CDs and Ellie’s eyes lingered there for a moment as she remembered what she was actually there for. Gotta stay on track.

You grabbed a pear-colored napkin from the pile that sat beside the cookies, and Ellie noticed the matching with the the sign. You handed it to her with the cookie inside, and when Ellie took a bite she almost passed out.

“Wait, whoa, holy shit…” her words muffled as she chewed. You couldn’t read her expression, but her brows pinched inward, and you weren’t sure if the taste surprised her or… if it was bad. Dammit, this batch. Maybe she had gotten a particularly bad cookie out of the hundred you hadn’t sold yet.

“Do you like it?” You squinted with a bit of hesitancy, feeling nervous. Her eyes shot up to you from the cookie immediately. “What do you mean? I love this. This is so fucking good! And you’re telling me these were almost a failed batch?”

You smile at her reaction. “Oh my gosh, thank you! I’m glad you like it. Do you want a CD?”

Ellie stuffed the rest of the cookie in her mouth and chewed a little before stuffing the napkin in her pocket. She swallowed hard before nodding. “Oh, uh, yeah. That’s actually what I was here for, but I don’t regret that cookie.”

Ellie felt her heart skip a beat when she heard you giggle. “Well, who are you looking for? I have pretty much everything… I think… I dunno. My gramma was just an insane diehard music fanatic, and I thought it’d be nice to let people have a little bit of that too. You know? But, now that I think about it these aren’t really ‘random’? All the artists are pretty well known and I sorted them into different genres so—what would you like?”

Ellie watched as you sighed afterwards, and she could tell you felt a little embarrassed because of your rambling. But she thought it was cute with the way you moved your hands and how you looked up to the left when you got sucked into your thoughts.

“Hm, let’s see if the cookie girl has what I’m looking for.” You smile at the name “cookie girl” and Ellie cringed once the name of the band came out of her mouth in fear that you would say the same thing everyone else did. And she was tired of searching.

But when your face lit up, she almost felt confused because she had never received that reaction before. She was more familiar with confused or sympathetic expressions.

“Are you serious? I definitely have them. I swear my grandma talked about them all the time before she passed.” You turned to the large bin and rummaged around. “You want their EP or—“

“Yes! Yes. Yeah. Gimme everything you got of ‘em. Please.”

You smiled before you were quick to search for what she wanted. Ellie studied your every movements in anticipation as your fingers walked over the tops of various CD cases. But once you stopped, she felt a sense of relief. Finally.

You pulled out CD after CD, almost dropping some when you turned to the table. You cautiously set them down and Ellie grabbed one to examine the cover.

“Oh man… holy fuck! This is really them…” she whispered while turning over the CD to look at the backside. She read the different titles of the band’s songs and looked over the faces of each member in the picture.

You take in how excited she is as she looks through the disks and stuffed each one into her bag. She looked cute. There was a sparkle in her eyes as you watched her look over the last one.

“Do you know how long I’ve been looking for them? Literally, nobody had their stuff for shit.” She looks up at you to be met with your beautiful smile. She almost got lost in your eyes again, and as a breeze just so flowed by, your scent mesmerized her once more.

You say something that Ellie doesn’t catch, but you say something again as a question and she has to force herself to blink to come out of her daze.

“Sorry—uh, what’d you say?” she squints, feeling a little flustered.

You blow a laugh through your nose. “I was just saying that I hope you have fun with your CDs. I’m gonna be packing up soon, so are you sure that’s all you want?”

Ellie frowned a little. “Oh, yeah, I’m good. I got what I was looking for… thanks to you. Really, thank you.”

You smile that beautiful smile of yours and nod. You turn away to rummage around in a larger bag and Ellie watches as you do. She’s not sure if she should say bye or if she should just walk away. She found the CDs, finally, but she had also come across another find, you.

The more she talked to you, the more she wanted to get to know you. She wanted to see that gorgeous smile all the time and look into your pretty eyes whenever she wanted to. She wanted to play songs for you on her guitar while you baked more cookies and she wanted to draw pictures of you and things you liked. The two of you didn’t even have to jump right into romance. She just wanted to be your friend and be around you all the time.

“Hey, um… do you—you go to the college right?” Ellie didn’t even notice when the words spilled out of her mouth, but it was enough to make you stop and look at her. She absentmindedly clutched the strap of her bag as she waited for your reply.

“Yeah, I do,” you answered. Ellie nodded and just stood there, wanting more words to tumble out of her mouth but she was worried she’d fuck up and say the wrong thing. Which is why she slid her bag off her shoulder halfway to dig inside. She opened up her sketchbook and ripped a corner piece of paper out before rummaging around for some type of pencil.

You watched as she leaned over the table and scribbled something down in a rush that you couldn’t quite decipher. When she was done, she scanned over it and handed you the paper. Her face was a light pink as she did so and it confused you as you took the paper from her.

When you looked down, there were some words along with what you think was a number that read, “thanks for the cookie n CDs…. call me sometime? - ellie w.”

You smiled like a schoolgirl and went to say something to her, but she had already left. You looked around the park before you to spot the girl with auburn hair and green eyes with the freckles but unfortunately had spotted no one. Though at least now you knew what you would do as soon as you got to your dorm.

You would call Ellie.

#im so sorry if this is boring im like legit. stressed out bc of what ppl will think!!!!!! #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams fluff #ellie williams x reader fluff

[mooncherrv]

Dating Robert "Bob" Floyd Headcanons

Character(s): Robert "Bob" Floyd x Reader Genre: Fluff Summary: Just some boyfriend!bob headcanons Author's Note: I wanna be bob's housewife so bad I am so in love with this man and he's not even real this is awful Masterlist

❥Bob LOVES to kiss your cheek or forehead. Everyday before he leaves for work he'll kiss your cheek or forehead depending on what you are doing at the time and say "See you tonight darlin" before he heads out.

❥He carries around an old film camera his dad got him when he was little and he likes to take candids of people he holds close to his heart, the other pilots, his family, some old friends, and most importantly you. He has a whole photo album of candids he took of you with little notes about what you were doing at the time. His favorite is the one from your first date when he took you for a walk on the beach before taking you home. It's his favorite and he takes it with him when he's deployed.

❥Bob is really good at cooking. Growing up he always helped him mom around the kitchen so naturally as he got older and eventually moved out he picked up cooking pretty easily. When he is able to he'll make you dinner a few times a week.

❥He enjoys puzzles and even framed a few of the more difficult ones he finished (they are like photos of space or something) and he likes to sit down with you and do puzzles while you tell him about everything you did while he was away.

❥Bob is loud as FUCK around you. He's rather reserved in public and keeps to himself but this man will not shut up if it's just the two of you. He rambles on about anything and everything. HOWEVER if you are speaking he is all ears and won't speak until he is completely sure you are done speaking.

❥He sings your favorite songs in the shower. He sometimes forgets he doesn't live alone since he's lived alone for so long so when you bring it up he gets all shy about it.

❥He likes to doodle little caricatures when he is bored sometimes or needs to keep his hands occupied while listening to someone or watching the news or something. He has small notebooks in various places around the house and a lot of the doodles are of you.

❥He likes to call you more classic pet names like "sweetheart" or "darling" and sometimes he will call you "sweetie" as well

❥He always finds any excuse to buy you flowers. Finished that book you've been reading for awhile? Roses in the kitchen for you the next day. Finally called to schedule an appointment you needed? He's handing you some tulips. Had a bad day at work? Bob is there with an assortment of flowers and chocolates. Any reason this man can find to gift you flowers he is taking it.

#top gun #top gun maverick #robert bob floyd #bob floyd #bob floyd x reader #bob x reader

[heartcereql]

am i the girl that you dream of?

✩ xavier thorpe x f!reader

SYNOPSIS- all over the summer, xavier has been having dreams of a certain girl, who, much to his surprise, arrives at nevermore for the new school year. 

CW- lowercase intended, cursing, bianca and xavier don’t have any history, also divina may be a bit ooc since we didn’t get much of her. 

A/N- i know it doesn’t really follow pretty when i cry (the song i got the prompt from) but i loved how it turned out. sorry in advance, it’s pretty long LMAO. also feel free to send request for wednesday characters! :)

moonlight bathed her features. her eyes glistened, reflecting the stars. hands delicately mused, fingers interwinned, softly caressing the other hand. her chest rose up and down, inhaling midnight air, fueling her lungs with the pure atmosphere that surrounded her figure. 

dreams always felt surreal. but when she was in them? they went beyond that. xavier stretched his hand towards her. slowly, his fingertips grazed her shoulder. and then he saw. 

his vision suddenly flooded with flashing memories. dazzling blue lights, very muffled chattering, hands, lips, figures, were all his senses were taking in.

4:39 AM

xavier woke up covered in sweat once again. the sun wasn’t up yet. dim light from the stars came through his window. 

he hadn’t been thrilled about going home for summer holidays. he thought he’d be staying at ajax’s or be sent to a summer camp. he would’ve liked that. but his father had kept him home. all. fucking. summer. and then the dreams started to appear. the first one, he doesn’t even remember. he just brushed it off. but then they continued appearing. and he found himself enhanced. for almost two months, he’d drawn the girl from his dreams. wether it were only sketches of herwaist, or doodles of herparted lips. he even had an unfinished painting of her moonlit face in a big canvas. anybody who had seen his latest pieces would’ve thought he was a stalker. he was just trapped in his house. it only conforted him  how close the beginning of the new school year was. 

back at nevermore, xavier felt at ease again. getting back on track carried an euphoric feeling for him. settling everything in his dorm, catching up with ajax and rowan, cleaning his art shed, it all gave him a sense of belonging that he wouldn’t change for anything. the dreams even went away.

and, in one of his conversations, he found out. about your arrival. though, at first, he paid no mind to it. ajax had said something about two transfer students incorporating this year.

“yeah, one of them will be here in a couple days. i heard the other’s application is still pending or something like that” rowan added. 

“damn, does everyone know but me?” he said. he meant it as a joke, but, deep down, he was worried he’d been living under a rock the whole summer.

“it’s not that big of a deal” ajax shrugged “but most likely.”

xavier groaned and mentally face-palmed himself. he could’ve checked enid’s blog. idiot. 

✩✩✩✩

meanwhile you were talking to principal larissa weems alongside your parents. the woman before you had an elegant and intimidating beauty and her words came out graceful and confident. 

she’d explained how the school worked, what the classes consisted in and the insitute’s norms. your parents were delighted with weems, relieved she would be in charge of your security and safety. she seemed trustworthy. she inspired comfort, but also discipline and respect. 

“now, now, y/n, it is time for you to meet your roommate and she will give you a tour around school. i’ll leave you sometime with your family to say your goodbyes” weems spoke with a warm smile. 

your parents nodded and thanked her as she escorted you out of her office. 

✩✩✩✩

as you were seeing your parents’ car drive away, a presence approached you. you turned around to meet a girl with chestnut, shoulder lenght hair and pale blue eyes. 

“hey! you must be y/n. i’m divina, your roommate” she gave you an enchanting smile as she offered her hand.

“charmed to meet you” you smiled back as you shook her hands.

“i think your belongings have already been moved into our dorm, so let’s take a look at the school first, shall we?” she asked, linking your arm with hers as you nodded, delighted. 

✩✩✩✩

xavier was working on his latest project very near the quad. it had been half his and half weems’s idea. a mural adorning one of the walls adjacent to the quad. his mind ran free as he painted some details in a crow. 

as he changed some of his used brushes for clean ones, his eyes scanned the quad. some girls chatting in a bench nearby, a group of gorgons in the back of the quad, and then his eyes made their way towards two moving figures. 

was that divina? she indeed was. and she was talking to a girl, who was looking for something in her bag. she was not wearing the uniform. she must have been one of the transfers. xavier stopped whatever he was doing to take a proper look at the pair. 

as the new girl found what she was looking for, her face now exposed, xavier realised. it was you. the girl he’d been dreaming of all summer. too shocked to react, he could only watch you walk away towards thelxiepeia hall. 

✩✩✩✩

september passed by faster than everyone had wanted. 

you and divina had become quite close and she’d introduced you to bianca, yoko, enid and kent. you’d even thrown a slumber party at your shared dorm; the girls helped you settle in and decorate your side.

xavier, on the other hand, had been thinking of how to approach you, if he even should. he hadn’t wanted to be affected by it, not wanting to start the neverending cycle this past summer had been, filled with incognitas about you. but the dreams came back. and they were different. you actually spoke to him in this new dreams. nothing that he could comprehend though. sometimes you spoke in unsolveable riddles, sometimes in a language he couldn’t understand. 

“it is time for you to make the very first project of this semester” professor Cross, horror literature’s teacher anounced, earning a groan from all the students. “it could’ve been an exam, no need to be so dramatic. the couples assigned and the book assigned for each are displayed on the classroom door. have nice evenings!” and with that, he vanished from the class. 

you and bianca made your way towards the door. she was the only one from your friend group who had horror literature in this period. 

“i’m up here and you, oh here!” she pointed at your names.

she got paired with a girl named iris. your name was written nexto to ‘xavier thorpe’. 

“it’s perfect that i got Lovecraft. i mean, i’ve loved him since i was merely in the womb. i spent all summer reading-” bianca was rambling about lovecraft before you interrupted her.

“hey, b, who is xavier thorpe?” you asked her, fidgeting with a sticky note in which you’d written his name along with ‘The Tell-Tale Heart’. 

“you know that kid who’s painting a mural in the quad? that’s him. i think he’s super good at literature , so you’re gonna ace this” she responded, walking you to the quad.

as you and her were about to start a conversation as to which outfit you should choose for your girls’ evening out, someone catched up to you. 

“hey, you’re y/n, right?” a tall boy, with sharp features and long hair, asked, locking eyes with you.

you felt a sensation of déjà vu run through you as you could only nod, enhanced by his figure. 

“i’m xavier” the boy smiled. “we are partners for this project, so, um, maybe you want to schedule for some days to work on it?”

“sure, sure” you reciprocated the smile, taking in the way his made you feel. “i’ll catch you later, bi” you said to your friend as she nodded and walked away. 

“so, uh, when are you free?” he asked as you turned back to him. “for the project, i mean”

“i think i have this afternoon free, and next one as well, if it works for you” you spoke.

you sounded exactly like what he’d dreamt. your silk soft voice reverberating in his ears, sending goosebumps down his body.

“sounds perfect. library, 4pm?” xavier said, observing your features in the sun, rather than the moonlight, admiring you. not a product of his imagination. just you. 

✩✩✩✩

xavier got to the library at the very time he’d told you. scanning the place, he finally found your figure. your bag was placed in a chair, and you were browsing through the shelves, looking for some books. 

“hey” he greeted. 

words caught up in your throat when you looked at him. he loved the way your eyes fluttered around, finally settling down on his.

“hi” you responded. “so. i’ve been collecting a few books about poe, you know, so we can make a deep analysis on the piece”

“cool, cool. i feel like the old man has a lot of connotations-” he started.

“wait you’ve read the tell-tale heart?” you asked, smiling. you loved poe’s works.

“yeah, everyone should” he chuckled. “i find poe inspiring. all of his horror pieces itch all the right places in my brain” he shrugged, licking his lips.

“i love poe too. i went to a summer camp this summer about him and it wa...” 

xavier let your words run through his mind as he focused on your excited expression, talking about something you were so keen on.

both of you sat now next to each other, rambling about nonsense, enjoying the other’s company, your assignment long forgotten. 

✩✩✩✩

and so the two of you had to meet again the next day and over the weekend, rushing your assignment.

but neither of you minded it. you grew closer, learning about each other. xavier found out about your passion for astronomy and your connection to the night. and you learnt about his relationship with his dad and his coping mechanism: painting. you’d even seen some of them, and you were captivated by them.

 he showed you his ability and he’d swear your reaction was his favorite thing ever. how your eyes widened in suprise, lips parted slightly, an amazed smile making its way.

and he told you about his visions. he trusted you enough. 

✩✩✩✩

“and, you know, sometimes i have dreams, but they’re real. the people, the creatures are real” he said, almost a whisper. 

you two were walking around the school’s surroundings, october’s cold breeze hitting your rosy cheeks. 

“like visions?” you asked

“sort of. the scenarios are barely real, but the people i see are. and lately, this girl has been appearing”

“is she a sleep nymph? i heard of them once, they’re pretty cool” he could feel your eyes piercing him as he looked forward.

“no, no, i don’t think she is. at first i thought she was just something i imagined, but then i saw her” he looked down at you as he spoke. 

“what were your dreams like?” you softly posed the question.

“i saw her, laying down under the stars. i could only see her in a blue palette. and then, i saw her memories. and i just can’t get her out of my head” 

you went quiet. he feared he’d scared you, and he was about to start rambling apologies when you stopped walking and took his hand. 

“xavier?” you looked up at him “am i the girl that you dream of?”

his heart skipped a beat. he wanted the ground to swallow him. he couldn’t scape.

“how’d you know?”

“i’ve been seeing you too. in the stars.”

he stared at you blankly. so he hadn’t creeped you out. he finally reacted, smirking.

his hands made his way to your face, holding your cold cheeks. you looked up at him, hands around his neck. he wanted that moment, that sight to last forever.

he leaned down and kissed you for an instant. he pulled away, just to watch your features before you pulled him down and kissed him again, loving the feeling of his lips on yours, like they were made for each other. 

#xavier thorpe #xavier thorpe x reader #wednesday netflix #xavier thorpe imagine #heartcereql

[thallyurdad0]

Gwendoline Christie

flirts, cute (ig), confused, they are in love. but they don't know.

GIF NOT MINE

[Just flirt. They are in love, especially reader. God. i love Gwen. Gwendoline and her Bf have an open relationship and are ok with having other relationships, but love each other *in this fic*. ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LANGUAGE]

Gwendoline Christie x Famous!Reader?

-

These days, everything just feels like a loop. Invitations, invitations and more invitations for parties, fashion shows and work. You felt full of it. You wake up and have to go straight to some meeting, you wake up and have to go somewhere, just to stare at people talking, you wake up...and you have people peppering you with questions and asking you to step on them. Not that you hate your fans, but you're just tired. You need some time. You are overloaded.

Sitting at one of the tables, not far from the stage, watching another fashion show that you were invited to and had to attend, because your husband is obsessed with money and knows that the source of all this is you. You let out a sigh, hoping this will be over soon. With the way you are barely able to concentrate on the show in front of you right now, you know this day is going to be unbearably long.

After trying and failing miserably to pay attention to the presenter on the stage, you decide to give up. You've given yourself a good forty minutes of trying, but your interest in what’s going on is non-existent and you're more than convinced that if you need whatever he's presenting, chances are it's already in the package you got.

What you still don't know is how you're going to spend the rest of your time. Not wanting to be too disrespectful by using your cell phone mid-presentation, you grab your not-so-big bag and pull out a blank piece of paper and a pen just to do some random doodling. Aimless. But sadly, drawing eyes or hands are no longer on your to-do list. But even so, you continue to draw, your eyes almost closing from sleep. A few minutes go by and you're just getting even more bored. Somehow while drawing you can’t shake the feeling of someone watching you. This is starting to make you uncomfortable. With a spunk of curiosity you lift your head to look around, trying not to be too obvious for everyone to notice. You can the other tables in the room, trying to discover the source of the sensation. When you finally achieve what you've been unknowingly looking for, you feel your breath hitch at the sight. All you find is a woman watching you like you’re a piece of art.

And in your opinion, this woman could be a painting that came to life. As you stare at the woman, you can tell that she could be the most beautiful woman in the world. Her medium blonde hair with curls like a tangle of beauty. An invitation to affection, the strands making small curves, like a smile. Unlike you,who’s pretty much just awkward, the rest of her is something like everything that could be described as something indescribable, the picture of professionalism. The delicate white skin that you would love to touch with your kindness, the lips of blood that boil not for heat but for love, the crystalline eyes, so deep that they carry more stories than a book can tell. It's the color of someone who carries something more than windows of the soul on her face; it's brute strength, beautiful and affectionate. That pulls your eyes to hers The irises of her eyes being the true art-stained space. Eyes you find hard to look away from.

Still sitting and looking at the woman, you can tell she noticed the red in your cheeks, shoulders and collarbone. Just like her, after being caught looking. But she doesn't look away, being unflinching with her eye contact. Her focus makes you even more flushed and confused, which makes you feel that the look isn't for you. After scanning the room thoroughly for the second time. You're sure the looks is for you, and it makes you cringe a little. Meeting her eyes again, you see that she smiles a little wider as she sees that you finally understand that she is looking at you.

But the universe might not want you to have a distraction or something. The man on stage calls your name, grabbing your attention. He’s talking about the models and the shows. Congratulations to you, since You helped with this. But now, really? The man continues, trying to keep your attention.

Try as you might, you can't break free of the woman's gaze. Smiling gently at the man, the rest of the adults and your husband standing around, you can't help, but steal some looks in the woman's direction. It's like you're stuck like this. And sometimes you can catch her looking and it's emotional, leaving warm little goofy smiles when you catch her looking. It's more exciting to know that she's interested in you and the game you've played with her. When everyone was up for the treats you got out of your chair so fast, you almost fell. You noticed the woman laughing and you're not sure how, but you somehow heard it. You just want her with now, because the sound was the most divine thing you ever heard.

"Are you well?"

Your husband asked, a small tone of false concern in his voice. You just wave chim away. Not much dialogue, just looking for the woman in the crowd. Your interest in her just grows, you want to go to her. But you’re failing. So you decide to go ask your close friends about this woman. Whispering to the not so short woman to your left you ask: *f/n = friend name*

"f/n do you know who this woman is?"

"Which one?"

"That one. Medium blonde hair, red lips, tall and pink dress."

You gesture vaguely in the direction of the mystery woman, not wanting to be too obvious.

"Oh, her. Her name is Gwendoline Christie, an actress who works with Tim Burton."

"Oh okay. Thanks."

"Why the question? Don't say something is going on."

Your friend whispers questioningly, with a rather interesting face and a sly smile. You just shrug your shoulders and curse under your breath. Going back to looking at the woman, she looks like she is not noticing you, she's talking to a man with glasses. They look really close. You blink with a frown on your face but try not to care too much and just walk over to the treats. Flirting certainly made the time pass faster than expected, but it also does something else. It made your heart beat faster in anticipation. What you have no idea. And hope to feel that, again. Take a moment to consider her thoughtfully, looking unobviously in your direction, for which you are more than grateful. 

—

inspiration from: Know Your Name. An fanfic in AO3 with Larissa x Reader.

Hope u liked this <3

I think i am going to make a part two 💀

(person who helped edited for a better english, bc Idk nothing: @lils-cards love u)

—

- baby gwen have my heart rn

GIF NOT MINE

#gwendoline christie #larissa weems #brienne of tarth #phasma #lady jane #miranda hilmarson #lucifer morningstar #fem reader #gender neutral reader #larissa weems x reader #brienne x reader #phasma x reader #miranda hilmarson x reader #lucifer morningstar x reader #gwendoline x reader #gwendoline have my heart #lady jane hit me #i want her #i want her so bad #gwendoline simps #im a simp #fluffy #confused #flirt #jan stevens #jan stevens x reader #i forgot jan tags #help #fiction #gwendolineuniverse

[elviola]

STEPPING STONE.

Lo'ak te Suli Tsyeyk'itan x Reader

PLOT: You are the shadow of the Sully Family's outcast, the one that knows him inside out. But when someone fresh faces his way, you are nothing more than another hindrance.

NOTE: honestly i can not for the love of my life do a 10k fic without breaking it into parts so here's to part 1 AND I SWEAR I WILL B ACTIVE AGAIN!!! i just got busy from sw so pls take this as my apology.. not proofread

WARNINGS: none

SHE/HER reader!

THE FLORA HATES YOU, when you sprint away from someone through the forest. You always trip and fall because of the different species sprouting their heads in the corners of the trees. You never became fond of them. That when someone gives you a wrap of them as a gift, you squish them under rocks to put in your make shift journal. Though, you don't fail to give up. Standing again, you brush the twigs and dirt that stuck to your reddish knees, and run. You run swiftly as the wind dances along your braids and falling leaves kissing your cheekbones. Your stamina isn't enough when you hunch over, back heaving in sweat as you manage to hide behind a log. Sitting down to pray that a certain Na'vi boy doesn't catch you. You look above to see the spaces that the trees won't occupy and see the blue sky illuminating Pandora. You wonder if the universe is as big as you imagine it, wanting to see it more. Pulling out your journal from your satchel, you write down what you've seen and done. A life log to look back to when your eclipse comes around. Too focused on your annotations, you fail to notice the creeping form beside the shrubs parallel to you.

Doodling down the last tree you've noticed on your way here, you were about to grab your satchel to use your pigments when a voice erupted suddenly out of nowhere.

"So, this is where you stay all day. What's so exciting about this?" You don't need to look around to know who it was, an all familar voice. You already sense a teasing smile forming on his face.

"Lo'ak, what do you need?" You close your journal, planning to finish it instead tomorrow. As you stand up, you get surprised again to see him already standing close infront of you. "I need you." He responds, handing back your satchel. You reach out to get it back, his hand lingering a little longer than expected. You're the first to pull back, rosy cheeks appearing on your face.

"In fact, Spider, unfortunately, needs you too. He cut his lip, he scratched his elbow, he–" You snap out of the trance when you hear the boy had gotten hurt. "Lead the way, Lo'ak."

You arrive to see Spider leaning back to the log of a tree and realizing Lo'ak didn't explain dramatically when you see all his wounds angry. "Spider, what happened?" You ask as you rummage around your satchel to find your herbal medicine. "It was half my fault, really. We were watching a sleeping Thanator when Lo'ak stepped on a branch and it heard us. Obviously" He says as he sticks out a tongue to Lo'ak. He rolls his eyes in response. You crouch down to clean Spider's cut. "You both could have been dead. Dead by the Thanator and dead by Jake. I bet he would even scold you with your cold body on the ground." Spider hisses at the sting when you applied the wrap for his elbow. You demand that Lo'ak help you carry Spider on the way home. "What did you need from me?" You ask him, glancing to the left behind Spider's head before you look back at front. "Just needed to see you, that's all. Told you, you spent too much in that paradise of yours." He replies, avoiding to bump into a stone as big as a direhorse. Your stomach rumbles out butterflies. You nod in agreement as you swore to spend time with them even more.

It was inevitable to be not scolded by Jake, for the two at least. "What were you even thinking at that moment? A sleeping Thanator, really? You couldl've gotten seriously hurt!" Both boys settled in their hut, shadows of them looming over the fabric from the campfire where you were sitting at outside. "____, did you know where they were?" Kiri asks, braiding Tuk's hair with colorful beads. Shaking your head no, you cross your leg over the other one. As she finishes her sister's hair, she looks over to you. Reading your face, she grins teasingly as her older brother did earlier. "You have a certain someone clouding your head recently, huh?" And as if she could read minds, your eyebrows pinch in false curiosity. "Oh, and who would that might be?" Tuk overhears the conversation as she stacks the rocks she collected earlier, "Lo'ak!!!!" You cover her mouth in attempts to hide your little silly crush. Tail thumping anxiously in hopes that he wouldn't hear. "Tuk! Secrets are kept in secret!" You scold her as she giggles mockingly like when you see Lo'ak train. Neteyam walks up, scanning everyone around. His ears perk up when he doesn't see his brother and father. "He's in trouble again, he got distracted by this girl." You nudge Kiri's shoulder to call her joke quits but Neteyam smiles knowingly, he knows everything when Lo'ak is involved. Neytiri comes along with Lo'ak, his ears flattened at his head. You know for sure he got a handful. When he sat down far from you, your heart ached for him. You wanted to comfort him, that it was okay to make mistakes, and it wasn't that big of a deal. But Jake arrives and sits down beside him. You lose chances of talking to him.

The stars overlapped across the dark sea above while they were twinkling brightly, you were laying on your back on the cold grass. Arms outstreched to your head, you waited for Lo'ak to come. It was your promised plan, whenever something harsh happens to the both of you. You would bask in the silence underneath the stars and bring peace at the thought of someone close beside you. Tail swishing in anticipation at the sound of his footsteps, you were hopeful to meet him again. There were no times that Lo'ak skipped. When you first met, down by the river you say a boy sitting by the stones. He couldn't reach the particular one resting on top of the taller ones, you couldn't just laugh at him, and so you gave him a little height. Face morphing in suspicion, he stared at you for a good minute until he stepped on the hand offered. Not a word said lingering in the tense air. As he took what he wanted, you were taken aback by his glare and you wished to see it more.

When you were around the age of being able to do things without the guidance of your parents, you saw him by a big tree. He was throwing rocks to get the fruits down. You realized how he had grown, taller than you he glanced down to see your eager face. "Do you need help?" You asked, he rolled his eyes as a smile appeared on his face. "When did I never?" You'll admit then he looked handsome that time, that was the trigger for your admiration. You were the aid to his wounds, his comrade in a battle, and his stepping stone in life.

Minutes turn into hours as Lo'ak kept you waiting alone in the forest. The whistling wind has settled down along with long gone bright sky. Even the stars were starting to leave. Fidgeting your fingers, your tail couldn't stop to thump on the ground. Your ears flatten in realization that the possibility of the both of you coming together beneath the bioluminescence trees and leaves were forgetten, that the past instances were a burden to attend to. That it was rude to leave an invitation neglected. As you begin to stand up, you hear a rustle of frantic footsteps nearing your way. You jump in a stance, readily to defend yourself when your eyes land on his. And your heart swells at the tears sought out to break within his amber orbs, "_____. 'M so sorry. I am–" He hiccups in the process of his emotions flowing through the night, through you. You rarely see Lo'ak unfold his walls to you, he always makes sure that his composture is firm. That whenever push comes to shove, he won't fall easily. But that doesn't mean moments like these don't exist, you hurriedly pulled him close. As if he would disappear into thin air and never come back, you embrace him with open arms. "Lo'ak. It's alright. Be calm, be at peace." You comfort him, smoothing his back with your palm as a sign that you have acknowledged his pain and you're out to lessen it. "Jake was– it was just too much." He reasons, reciprocating the gesture you offered. His head digging into your shoulder and hiding his face on your neck. You speak nothing more. That his hands finding yours as he pulled back was a sign that your prescence was more than enough. For the first time in a while, he gazed at your eyes as his curved along his familar pearly smile. You couldn't stop yours reach your ears as well. "____. Thank you, thank you so much. You don't know how grateful I am for you being with me." Your cheeks warm at the words, "Always, Lo'ak. I'll be here always."

The village isn't clueless to the relationship you and Lo'ak have. The words exchanged and the gnawing affection that yearns to shatter the crisp facade you both build were evident as the moon in the sky. The only thing that was annoying was both your ignorant nature to one another. That when Lo'ak stays longer with you than usual, you'd think it was a pity thought, and he was only being nice. While when you were helping him arrange the bows they were about to use for their hunt, he'd thought it was a pity thought. A puzzle piece won't connect with another one that doesn't compliment its provided shapes, you're the missing piece to Lo'ak's abstract puzzle. And the village–even Kiri, hopes you both realize it.

Tranquility doesn't last long when the Sky People return to steal the treasure that isn't rightfully theirs. You learn it when Lo'ak rushes to his brother's side when you wake up from your hut, frustrated by the noise. He had shaken you awake to tell you about what had happened. That your–his forest was crying in agony from the pain that the Demons brought once again. Your eyes shot open, your ears alert from the shouts of help from the People. You tell Lo'ak and his family to be okay, "When did I never?" He teasingly adds and you can't help to giggle in an innapropriate situation. As you watch him mount his ikran, you analyze Jake's words from afar. And you watch them rhythmically vanish to the clouds.

Your hush pleas filled the empty homes of the People, in wishes Eywa would hear,

"Please, be safe. Please, come home."

The families of the Warriors sits beside eachother, assuring one another that their sons and daughters that chose to fight were safe. You were praying to Eywa, the only resort you could do. You weren't brave like those who left, your skills only fit for hunting dinners for your family. Yet you promised that when they had come back, you were willing to train with your blood, sweat, and tears. You were about to walk to another family to tell them that everything would be alright when you hear someone come from behind the tree, his blue skin painted with dirty mud as his pupils were blown wide from the adrenaline of running. "They're back! They have come back!" You swore your heart was leaping out of your chest to run faster than yourself to see him. Excusing people to the side when they were on your way, you almost trip on your own tail swishing in excitement. It had been hours since the new battle had occurred and you were anxiously waiting for their return with your hands turn fists, the crimson liquid almost broke out free. You catch sight of Jake first, back hunched with his hands occupying his head. He sees your feet, obviously tempted to ask where his youngest son is. He points to the woven curtain ahead, you rush in.

Your knees weaken at the sight of Neteyam's skin fresh with angry wounds. Back layed down on the mat, you apologize for the hurt he was feeling. He gives you a small but compassionate smile. You spin to see Kiri bandaging a shoulder you've layed your head on a thousand times. You walk to see Lo'ak hissing at the sting from the tightness it brings. "Dear Eywa, what and how did this happen?" The questions that you had formulated a while ago disappeared when you see his whitey smile comforting you. "____. I am fine, this is nothing." He didn't understand why it offended you greatly, "Nothing? This is not nothing! You are bleeding everywhere!" You disagree, inspecting with sly eyes as you skim over his biceps, and shoulders."Look, your cuts from earlier are open again. "Is being careful hard to understand, who did these stiches?" Kiri rolls her eyes, "So you say I am a bad healer?" You freeze, shaking your head no. Lo'ak manages to let out a chuckle to your silly ramblings.

As Kiri and Neteyam retrieve to the campfire to seek solace with their mother. Lo'ak finds his elsewhere, your hands finding his own again. "Seriously, you could have been grieveously wounded. Even more, I could have–" He doesn't let you finish the sentence, "I wouldn't. Not when I know you're waiting for me." Your eyebrows rest from their pinched expression as your stomach begs to do backflips. He might have caught up by your reaction as he pulls your hand closer, placing it by his cheek. Your body heats up when he nuzzles in your palm, "I'm not lying. How can I leave you alone?" You giggle at his antics, thumb rubbing circles on his cheek as a reply. He hums in satisfaction with you by his side.

Weeks after the incident, everything starts to return to normal. Except for the fact that you were now training beside Lo'ak and his brother, promising yourself an oath that you would look aftet him as he does to you. So here you stand in an open space at the forest, bow drawn to stick sharp at the distanced bark of a tree. Lo'ak's hands position your shoulders to a better posture, criticizing your way of hunting with your stance. You scoff in disagreement, pointing back out the pros you achieve with said technique. He rolls his eyes, "If you don't do it like this," his calloused hands burns on your flush shoulders again, straightening it back, "You won't shoot it right." Eyes focusing on the target, you try to tame your tail. He tucks your hair behind your ear, failing you to focus. "The only thing you're good at is being cute." Lo'ak says as he laughs in amusement, you let go of the hold you had on the string of the bow. Arrow landing on the dot in the middle, you glance to his direction. Chin high and proudly smirking, "Well, who knew? You are a good teacher." As he was about to lock you in his arms, you ran away from his frisky chase.

"Don't run away too far! I might not be able to catch you!" Lo'ak shouts, complaining when he gets his foot stuck in the roots of a tree. You reply, "Then go faster! Stronger!" He shakes his head in amusement, loving the way you spend your time with his. He wishes this would happen occasionally, to cease the banging migraine he would always have whenever he goes back to his family. Goes to his Father, meeting those agitating eyes that he was certain it could crush his tiny soul. That his soul was only trying to fuel the remaining strength he had and he was grateful you were trying to fire it back up. Yet his dad was trying to take it away, abolish his rights to attain what he wanted. And not what they wanted.

Until his very own home was being taken away from him.

The Sullys are leaving the forest, leaving the Omatikaya people. It's an impulsive decision when you sneak up with the kids to their parent's hut, crouching through the fabric to hear voices clashing with one another. You knew they were going to do it. You watch Lo'ak's face turn dissatisfied, anguished, and ruined. Kicking rocks with his feet after Tuk explained what she heard. You stand up near him, hand on his shoulder as you pull him close. “It'll be alright, something worth seeing for me?” His eyes meet yours, disappointment etched on his brows. “Nothing is worth seeing without you there with me.” You laugh, “Stop fooling around, skxwang. This is something serious.” Lo'ak removes your hand from his shoulder and holds it in his, intertwining fingers with yours. “I'm not laughing, am I? I want you to join us.” Your eyes stared in fright, he wants you to come. The forest is everything to you, your home of your parents, and the home where your heart began to beat.

And you convince yourself it was–is his too. Would you give up the likelihood of not seeing your parents for the chance that both, you and Lo'ak's future would unfold? His hold is strong on you, his chest close to yours, and you swear you could hear his heart beat.

You seek out your parents in attempts to hold close your staggering heart, excusing yourself from Lo'ak. You run to your home, feet prickling heat as you step on variety of rocks. Ducking below to hanging leaves and branches, you finally spot the familar pathway of shrubs that you tripped over multiple times. Flowers started to grow at the side and you still believed it was from the love of your family that helped them live. "____! Oel ngati kameia! What a surprise!" Your father shouted, approaching you with shoulders back and head high. Even as you grew old, he had not yet lose his charming ego that led your mother to adore him. "Hello, 'pa! I have something to tell you, where is 'ma?" You ask, replying with the greeting gesture, you proceed to hug your dad. Missing the warmth you had grown accustomed to, it wasn't the same to anyone. "She is inside, coincidently making food. Let us feast on my hunt!" And even though you are capable to bring them food everyday, your father still decides to test his bones every challenge he goes through.

You spot your mother sat down, rearranging the food your father had brought home. "Yawne! ____ has come back." Originally, you rarely visit home. Only ever setting foot inside whenever you had a good hunt to give them, as you grew closer to Lo'ak. You grew closer to his family as well, always hanging out by their hut, and falling asleep inside too often. They've treated you as their blood so it's no surprise when your mother suddenly hugs you tight as a thanator. "Oh, _____. If I knew you were coming, I could have your mat fixed up." She pulls back, smiling wide with a waterfall begging to burst in her eyes. Your heart burns at the words, feeling guilty to leave when they see you ever so rarely. "Mama. 'Pa. I have something to say– why don't you guys sit?" You ask anxiously. The both of them look at eachother, curiousity etched on their faces. You prepare to speak as you notice their hands finding eachother under the table and you can't help but to break the dam. Sobbing you told them, "I want to leave the forest. The peo–" hiccuping, their eyes go wide. "What do you mean, ___? Where– you will go where?" Your mother asks, lip trembling from disappointment. "What?! Why? Why will you leave? Have we not given you the good life Eywa has sought out for you?" Your father stands, frustration deep into his eyebrows. You stand firm, wiping the fallen tears from your cheek. "I will follow Lo'ak. I will follow them to Awa'atlu. He is my—" Your father strides forward, pointing an accusing finger to your face, "Your mate? No. I have not heard any of this proclammation. Why follow when he does not reciprocate your heart?" –"Yawne. That is enough." Your father looks to you with hurt, he glances to your mother, and walks out. You want the ground to devour you whole, your mother stares at you as she grins. "Go. Set your heart free, my syulang."

You cry once more.

You arrive at Awa'atlu, after countless tiring nights on your ikran. You finally can feel your legs find life again, the grainy sand ticking beneath. Unique looking Na'vi circle around you, forming a big crowd. Inspecting your tails and skin. You glance over to Lo'ak wanting to ask if he ever knew about the People here. But you notice his eyebrows are up and eyes wide, you follow his sight, and see a girl walking up to shore. She's beautiful, you admit. As mystique as the ocean. Neytiri rolls her eyes and Neteyam nudges his shoulder. You silently wish to go back, chest tightening out of jealousness.

Jake is the first one to speak. Asking for uturu and the Metkayina gasp in surprise. Toruk Makto hiding from the humans isn't a pleasing sight to see, their tsahik making it obvious that they had 'demon' blood within. Your own blood boiling when they grab Lo'ak's hand for all to see. His head turning 'no' to you when he noticed your ears twitching. Ronal hisses when Neytiri comes close and tension stars to rise.

Lo'ak's tail swirling around your leg catches your attention. Supposedly wanting to make you calm down, your heart did the opposite, almost leaping out of your chest.

Ao'nung and Tsireya were the ones assigned to teach you, learning Tsireya was the girl that made Lo'ak turn stone whenever she went near. She was making you turn greedy, making the most out of every intetaction made with Lo'ak instead. "If you want to live here, you have to ride." Ao'nung states, eyeing each one of you with pride swelling in his chest. Lo'ak goes first, forming tsahelyu with the ilu. Tsireya warns him to start slow but in his nature, he is stubborn. So he doesn't.

After hours of practicing the ways of the water. You head home to the marui you share with the Sullys. Walking back, you notice Lo'ak isn't following behind. "Go on, I'll check on Lo'ak." You tell Neteyam, he nods, grateful of your help.

As you stray far to the shore of the sea, you hear his voice but overlapping hers. You beg yourself to go, that this was their private moment. But your ears twitch at the sound of Lo'ak crying. Lo'ak doesn't easily cry–so why does he cry to her? Your feet tingle at anticipation, wanting to walk to him. Ask him what happened and who had him break out. Your head pounds heavily, dizzy from the newfound information. So instead you headback to the hut, head back to dreaming of what you could have been with him today, yesterday, and hopefully with the future.

#avatar the way of water #avatar 2009 #avatar 2009 x reader #lo'ak te suli tsyeyk'itan #lo'ak x reader #lo'ak x you #lo'ak avatar #lo'ak fic #lo'ak angst