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#i’m really self conscious about these things
pit-and-the-pen · 2 days
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Hi! I am so grateful you came across my feed! You also have an incredibly extensive prompt list which is amazing btw. Could I please get a 104 and 75 with Azriel?? I have been wanting to see how they would do with a fairy, considering they are like the opposite of a bat. They’re light and airy, gorgeous wings. Illyrian wings are gorgeous too but in a dark way and I think the contrast is cool without having to make them an angel. Ya know? Thank you if you end up doing it!
Thank you so much and thank you for the request! My prompt list is left over from an event I did when I hit 100 followers and I just kept adding to it. I love the idea of the difference in their wings. Because the books have already explored a few different types of wings and I think fairy wings are absolutely gorgeous.
The reader is half High Fae, half fairy.
Hope you like it! <3
Warning: Unwelcome touching (not by Azriel), Smut (18+), protective Az!!!!
WC: ~1.7k
Divider by @cafekitsune
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My  wings had always been something I was immensely proud of, sure they weren’t the stark white feathered covered ones from Day or the gorgeous bat-like wings from the Illyrains but you loved them. Translucent but pink iridescent, the membrane golden in color. Compared to my stature, short by fae standards, they easily were half of my height. 
When I moved from the Spring Court to Night, I remember feeling slightly self-conscious about them. Before the mating bond had snapped, Azriel had spent many nights reassuring me how beautiful he thought they were. How they made me special. I would sniffle into his neck, “But they let everyone know I’m only half High Fae.” He would hold my head in his hands and try not to laugh at the absurd concern. “So is Rhys, so is Cassian. Most High Fae are. That’s not a bad thing.” Light kisses were pressed to my face, “If anything it makes you more special. Something no other High Fae has.” His words calmed my raging mind. Once the mating bond had snapped, he really began to worship them. He was the first person I had let touch them. The both of us learned they truly were as sensitive as his own. It became something he could tease me with, only in the privacy of our bedroom. One touch and I would melt into his touch. 
Now, I stood in the middle of the throne room at Hewn City. Dress in midnight blue, the same exact shade as my mates siphons. The floor length gown is skin tight and the velvet was smooth under my fingers as I tried to smooth it out. 
I fidgeted slightly out of nerves. I had refused the first time Rhys offered to glamour them away, they were too much a part of who I was for me to hide them even in this vile place. But I still felt very exposed around this many unfamiliar faces.
Azriel had stepped away to join the conversation Rhys was currently having with Keir. Placing a small kiss on my temple as he walked away, “Have fun, sweetheart.” I instantly started looking for Mor, desperate for some semblance of comfort.   
I found her on the dance floor. I gave her a low bow, hand extended which she returned with a perfect curtsey. I took her hand and we began to weave through the other couples as we waltzed around the ballroom, her head thrown back with laughter. 
A pair of hands on my hips swept me out of her grasp. I let out a startled cry, expecting to be met with my favorite pair of hazel eyes. The male that had grabbed me was certainly not Azriel nor anyone I noticed. I could smell the faerie wine on his breath as he spoke in my ear, “What pretty wings.” I thanked him, my voice getting stuck like gum in my throat. I tried to pull the unknown male's hands off of my hips, even to just push them up to my waist but he just dug his hands in tighter. I yelped at the pressure and he just gave me a cocky smirk. 
“I know how sensitive Illyrian wings are, and given the shadowslingers scent all over you, I bet you do too,” He laughed at my shocked expression, “I wonder if these are just as sensitive.” By this time, we had stopped dancing. I stood frozen, bile turned my stomach as he reached a grimy hand up to stroke the edge of my wings. His rough touch made me chirp in pain, he had pitched the fragile membrane between his nails and dragged them down. 
He went to repeat the motion again when I felt the heat of him disappear entirely. When I looked around for him, I saw large black wings in front of my face. The male that had been touching me was pinned to the dance floor. Azriel’s heavy boots, holding him there by his neck. The male was desperately clutching at his leg, trying to pull him off. Azriel scoffed.
“Doesn’t feel so good to have someone touch you when you don’t want them to?” He pressed down a little harder, the muscles twitching in his leg. 
“Now, if you ever think about touching my mate, or anyone else, without their expressed interest,” His hand went to rest on truth-teller’s hilt. “You will find yourself without hands.” He lifted his leg off the male's neck and didn’t spare him a glance as he grabbed my hand and started leading me out of the ballroom. 
People jumped out of our way and I didn’t even think of saying anything to him as I felt his fury down the bond. Not at me, never at me. But for not being there to stop the hands I could still feel on my wings. He pulled us into a room, no, a closet, and I could almost make out the shape of him from the light that snuck along the frame. 
“Did he hurt you?” He asked sternly. Fae Lights flickered on, giving the room a soft glow. I shook my head and he let out a heavy exhale. He placed his forehead against mine and we just stood there as both of our breathing evened out
“Az, you didn’t have to do all of that.” I finally spoke blushing, the dim lights of the room doing nothing to protect me from his gaze.
“You don’t understand, I will do anything to protect you.” The solemnity of those words made my heart lurch and heat pool in my stomach. 
“I don’t know whether to be scared or turned on.” His laugh echoed in his chest. 
“Look at my dirty girl,” He started kissing down my neck, “Does seeing me defend you turn you on?” I whimpered when his tongue started following his kisses. 
“I don’t know, you’re the one that dragged me into a literal closet.” He growled lightly. 
“Be nice, sweet girl.” Chiding me, I felt desire and defiance flood my veins. 
“Bite me.”
 “With pleasure.” He all but purred in my ear and he was on me. His lips captured mine. Teeth captured my lower lip when I moaned into his mouth. His tongue explored my mouth, brushing against the roof of my mouth and my legs turned into jelly. He hiked my leg up to rest on his waist, using the hand on my back to stabilize me. Trailing up my leg with his free hand. 
“Fuck” He groaned when he reached the center of my thighs. Blood flowed to my cheeks. I was soaked. He didn’t waste anymore time before he slipped my panties to the side. I cried out as deft fingers found my clit and started rubbing tight, fast circles. 
My hands started to trail down to reach for his waistband but his shadows pinned my arms to my side. 
“Let me make you feel good, my love.” I moaned at his words. My moans instantly broke into a scream as I felt two of his fingers plunge into me. He curled against the rough spot and I panted out his name.  
“Az…Please, I need more.” I begged him. He just started to kiss my neck again, sucking what I knew would be angry bruises. His kisses started to trail lower, his shadows once again helping him as they slid the top of my dress down to expose my breasts. My hands went to his hair as he wrapped his lips around my nipple. Sucking the perfect amount of pressure, mixed with his fingers pistoning in and out of me. I felt myself fall apart under him. My climax racked through me hard, I sagged against his hand still on my back. 
“There you go. Good girl.” He praised me. I expected his hand to pull away but he kept working me through waves of pleasure. I whined, “Too much. Az.” I panted out the words, chest quickly rising and falling as I tried to catch my breath. 
“Can you give me one more?” His kisses started trailing lower and he unwrapped my leg from his waist. I was going to say something but it got lost on my tongue as he started to sink to his knees. He began to trail kisses up my leg as he went to throw my foot over his shoulder. 
He placed one of my hands on his head, my fingers instantly grabbing his soft locks. 
“Hold on princess.” Was the only warning I received before he dove in between my legs. I mewled at the pressure his lips sucked around my clit, still sensitive from my last orgasm. Broken versions of his name left my mouth and I tried to stop my hips from bucking. He used his free hand to guide my hips, letting me ride his face. It didn’t take long for him to have me at the edge. My eyes squeezed shut, white spotting the black behind my eyelids as he gave my clit a soft nip. That was enough to have my orgasm crashing over me. This time, my knees did buckle out from under me but Azriel’s hands were there instantly to hold me up. 
I blinked up at him. He was the picture of male satisfaction as he took in my glassy eyes. I once again went to reach for his pants but he pushed my hands away with a chuckle. 
“Later. I promise.” He said when I pouted at him. “Two isn’t enough for you, sweet girl?” I shook my head and he really laughed at that. He stood back up and smoothed out the lines in his suit. He helped me adjust my dress back into place. My hair was a lost cause, as well as my smudged makeup. He pressed a bruising kiss to my lips and when he pulled away he whispered in my ear
“Now we’re going to go back out there, covered in your scent and maybe that will remind people just exactly who they’re messing with from now on.”
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fredwkong · 1 day
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Hey there! I love what you do to/for your readers, and wanted to throw an ask out there. I’ve always had a rubber fetish, but never been able to afford any gear of my own. I just finally bought my first latex suit, but now I find I don’t have the balls to wear it out in public, or even to gear night at the local gay bar. I’m just too inhibited and self conscious. So here we go, I’m like kinky putty in your skilled hands. I trust that I’ll thoroughly enjoy whatever you come up with, whether I want to or not. 😉
Come on, you’ve just gotta try it out. Pretend that they’re all in latex, too. Maybe that will help.
Your imagination is a powerful thing, after all. Just put on your gear and look at yourself in the mirror. Imagine yourself filling it out better. Think about how it would feel to have the rubber stretch against your growing muscles, squeaking as you push it so far that it seems to expand. Your shoulders widening as your arms thicken beyond the limits of the suit.
Take a look at your legs too. Really imagine what your rubber suit would look like with massive quads and thick calves filling it. Think about your big feet in some tall boots, and your ass and cock stretching the latex so everyone knows how horny it gets you. Just imagine how much precum you’ll find in the crotch when you open it up later, after a whole night of feeling the suit squeak and stretch around your thick muscled up body.
Now you’re ready to go out on the street and imagine everyone around you in latex, too. It’ll help you build up confidence in your new body. Imagine the dad mowing his lawn as a daddy wearing a sheer rubber tank top and ass-hugging latex booty shorts. Imagine the college boy on his bike in a full gimp suit, bouncing up and down on his built-in plug with every stroke of the pedals. Look at the jock smoking outside the gym and think about how good he’d look in some bleachers-style pants with a matching rubber cap.
See? You made it to your event just fine, and left some sexy rubber men in your wake. Didn’t I tell you you can change anything just with the power of your mind?
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If this got you horny, consider putting some spare change in my Ko-fi cup so I can write even more hot stories.
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laineystein · 3 days
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If I may? You seem to have an incredibly rosy view of Israel and live comfortably there. And I am happy you do! I just also have seen Israelis on tumblr speak of the struggle with the rising cost of living.
This includes having to be self conscious about the price of brands to pick, and the rent of apts. (Which are pretty common things to deal with anywhere lately). I’ve also seen an Israeli blogger say that if you don’t have a background in engineering and tech, there’s not much of a future for you in Israel-or at least not one where you can live well.
On a personal level, I struggle to comprehend the idea of bomb shelters being a conscious part of every day life in so many parts of Israel. I don’t know how you guys do it, I really don’t.
I’ve been passive-aggressively criticized for having what some would deem a rosy view of life in general so I don’t know if I’m the best person to be giving you my feedback. What I can say confidently is that I have lived elsewhere and I will forever choose to live in Israel because it is the place I truly feel is home. Yes, things are expensive but they’re expensive where I lived in the diaspora as well. Homes here are not any more expensive than they were where I lived in the diaspora. Our economy is certainly curtailed to specific professions but so is every economy. Being an engineer and being in tech is also currently the most lucrative profession in the diaspora. I’m not saying that Israel doesn’t have its issues. It does and I reference them often. I’d probably talk about them more if I wasn't so used to a lot of it; I’m used to sirens and bomb shelters and tzahal and I don’t know how to explain that to someone who isn’t. It’s just always been apart of my life and it’s not going to change anytime soon so it is what it is. I also have no problem acknowledging that I grew up very privileged and still live a very privileged life so that may have something to do with my viewpoint. But here’s the thing - I just can’t live in a non-Jewish world. I can’t live my life comfortably in a non-Jewish world. And that’s not solely because of antisemitism. I keep kosher. I keep Shabbos. And nearly everyone I love (in the diaspora) is visibly Jewish. The men wear kippot and tzitzis. The women dress tznius and cover their hair. When you are this religiously observant it’s difficult to exist in a non-Jewish world. Our holidays are different and it’s not a default to have them off and not every company you work for will be fine with you taking them off - even if it’s illegal for them not to. In the US, you can’t make friends with coworkers because you can’t see them on the weekends or eat at their restaurants or in their homes. Sending your children to a Jewish school like the one I attended is like paying college tuition per child, per year; my parents paid over 100K every year sending me and my three brothers to school - the same school would be much more affordable in Israel. We’re nothing but pawns to the political system there - the right and the left both hate us. We are politically homeless and we’re too much of a minority for it to matter. So there’s a million reasons *not* to live in the diaspora as a Jew. For me, there is also a million reasons to live in Israel. The proximity to our holy sites. The weather. The fact that we have beaches and deserts and mountains and forests and rain and snow and sunshine. The diet and the healthier lifestyle. The joy. There’s so much joy here and I feel sorry for anyone that disagrees. I can be openly Jewish here. My Jewishness is not an inconvenience here. I do not have to apologize for it or hide it. And yes, I will forever feel safer here than I ever have in the US. Is Israel also an absolute dumpster fire sometimes? Of course it is. I’m not saying it’s for everyone. Living here will be a huge shock for many Jews. But for some of us, it makes sense and the pros will forever outweigh the cons.
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mstormcloud · 3 months
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I think applying tropes commonly found in Sonadow fics to other sonic ships is very funny
Like today I saw the cute posts by Blu-ish about how hedgehogs circle and headbutt eachother when courting and how Sonic and Shadow would do that and I agree.
However I think the implication that mobian hedgehogs do this is HILARIOUS when applied to ships that only involve one hedgehog.
Like Silver starts circling around Espio one day and lightly shoving him with his hip or his shoulder and Espio is like: ???? What are you doing??
Or even Blazamy like- Amy keeps circling Blaze and the less Blaze reciprocates Amy does it more to try to get Blaze to react. Blaze eventually just tries to politely tell Amy to stop cause it’s hard to hold conversation while she’s moving all around.
But later Blaze talks to Silver and is like: “I have no idea what she is trying to do…perhaps she is finding a weakness in my stance? Should I fear her hunting me for sport???”
And Silver is like: uh. Well. I think she’s hitting on you? It’s a hedgehog thing.
And Blaze just freaks out because WHAT DO YOU MEAN AMY WAS FLIRTING WITH HER
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yea-baiyi · 1 year
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one thing i love is how shi qingxuan and xie lian are just buddies? the book is full of all kinds of complicated relationship dynamics and traumatic backstories, but xie lian meets shi qingxuan after his third ascension and they have zero history together and they just get along? they talk comfortably and they look out for each other and they are on the same bitchy wavelength? they don’t get a lot of time to bond and get close but its clear that in time they could? sometimes you just meet someone you vibe with and they’re your friend it’s not that deep and you know what it makes me so happy to think about!!!
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undyinglantern · 1 year
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the amount of surprised pika “wait people actually shave their arms?” comments on posts about body hair are so funny like I unironically am so happy for you that you weren’t laughed at by a classmate for having hairy arms “like a man” in like 4th grade this is why I wish body hair conversations would stop centering around armpit hair
#okay that’s the tldr but the way I actually remember it is that the classmate (a boy) pointed out my arm hair and ask why so hairy#and I genuinely was so confused I was just like idk??? and then later at home that day I asked my mom about it and she was like#It’s bc your dads side of the family is hairy so then I later talked to that guy again like ‘I take after my dad’ or whatever#And /then/ is when he laughed and was like ‘but you’re a girl’ about it#Granted I’m non-binary but like I didn’t know that in elementary#Plus I didn’t stop shaving until around mid 2010s and was still self conscious about it for years#Like I remember feeling embarrassed during college (2018ish) if I had to use the rest room and someone else was in there when I would roll#My sleeves up to wash my hands#Anyways I eventually stopped caring about it sometime within the last year or 2 but see how long that took? It really shouldnt#Like some of us just genetically have more darker thicker visible body hair than others and we shouldn’t be shamed for it#One thing at a time though because even I’m still working through leg hair shame#I don’t shave them anymore but I also haven’t worn shorts outside of my bedroom in years#I’ll literally switch into shorts if it’s too hot right before bed and switch back into pants before stepping out of my room in the morning#I’ve been feeling cute the past few days and it’s starting to warm up again plus also had a convo w mom recently so#I might change that soon but only within the house still bc baby steps <3#Anyways I’m just rambling now so I should stop. Good night !!
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howdydopillar · 6 months
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woke up in so much pain today :(…
idk if I’m going to have the energy to post today… but I’ll try…
my head hurts and my body is hurting so much…
my family always called me the “runt” of my siblings, now I can see why :/
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yeyayeya · 4 months
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I’m back! Well, not necessarily, but I’m on the road back home. I am mentally exhausted, but my break back in Mexico was fun! I won’t exactly get back to posting normally, but I will in a few days
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khytal · 11 months
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*patrick voice* oh boy 3am 4am (talking a little about online communities, nothing new or personal but lengthy enough to put under a cut)
feeling a little sad that as much as I try to keep my little corner away from fanbases the bad vibes still manage to reach me :( this is the most evident with trigun, though I largely attribute that to the renewed interest and popularity it’s been seeing in the past 5 months
just the knowledge that there’s so many people who like kv is enough to make me never want to talk about the series (bc the twins are a large part of why I love the story in the first place, and their relationship is still the only one I can actually put into words). and without an audience, my enjoyment of it kinda fizzles out
also lately I’ve just been kinda cranky about people flanderizing vash and wolfwood. like it’s unbelievably widespread. and a very unimportant thing compared to other stuff happening in my life. but aggressively misinterpreting a character feels like a crime to some degree
anyway I love trigun very much but I can’t stand most of the community and I’m not a social person (beyond being respectfully friendly when replying to people) so it’s left me feeling weirdly estranged
but at the very least I’m comfortable with talking about trigun here. I should do that more, considering almost everything I had to say was kept to private groups so like. only a select few know how much I loved stampede (if it wasn’t evident in the plant song analysis I did a couple months ago lol)
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theswedishpajas · 19 days
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I don’t do this usually but I feel like I’ve been super quiet lately and I REALLY liked the nails I did this week so I’m gonna showcase them!!
This week’s inspired mostly by my Dark Urge playthrough, just in very general strokes though- the star nails obviously symbolizing Astarion 🍷🦇✨✨✨
The black crackle is part about it bring the DARK urge and also just a hint towards hell in some way (lava, tiefling, all that) but also a favorite of mine in general because it matches with my skin condition ✨✨✨
Four of them, all but the ones with the gold star, glow pink in the dark (and under blacklight as well)
I think they’re about 6-7 layers of polish, counting the base coat?
I repaint them once every other week on the day after my bath, and dedicate most of the day to them as to not accidentally ruin them before they’re fully dried/cured (I don’t use gel polish)
The day after my bath isn’t really open for much with me either way as I’m still soaking in my lotion throughout the day and thus can’t really get dressed to go outside etc.
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sarah-dipitous · 6 months
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It’s hard to believe it’s almost been a month since Meg adopted me and even harder to believe how big she’s grown in such short time. But she’s still my little baby who loves one piece and kisses on her nose💖
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dorianwolfforest · 7 months
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Remember when I said I don’t like posting stuff that doesn’t preform well in other fandom spaces because I have performance anxiety and need to be funny and talented and good all the time and ssoblr is kind of where I put all of the. Parts of me that aren’t.
Anyway have a drawing of Kim Kitsuragi as juvenile officer, not because you know who he is, but just cause i liked the art and I wanted to show it to someone.
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gregmarriage · 9 months
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the whole thing of “oh, you use mobility aids?’” “oh, you use *insert thing that makes my life easier*?” said in the kinda tone where it’s kinda obvious they’re looking down on you for it. literally go fuck yourself <3
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geminison · 3 months
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your color choices are so gorgeous, every time i see your art im like woah... colors.....
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ty!!!!!
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whoreiaki-kakyoin · 2 years
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For my next trick, I’m going to propose the following: What if my f/os also struggled with their body image and how to love and be kind to their bodies? And what if we helped each other take it a day at a time in our recovery, and knew we couldn’t magically fix each other’s problems but could support each other? And what if we cook for each other and help each other unlearn our food-related trauma and have soft slow sex with so much gentle praise and body worship, kissing every inch of each other so we can feel how loved and cherished our bodies are by our loved ones?
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inga-don-studio · 11 months
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Much as I generally don’t like having my idiosyncrasies pointed out by people who don’t really know me, I have one coworker at this new job who has been doing just that and uh … kinda learning some new things about myself.
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