#idk! weird story in my life

[dawnleaf37]

why did . why did the owner of the marrio heritage posts blog contact and then block me

#context! #a few months ago in like may I wrote a post after the sonic aproves blog reblogged my post disapproving it #i believe the post was just . ‘why so mine - the crafter’ #i got confused on why this happened so I scrolled down the blog and saw a lot of discourse #not my thing but I was a little uhh alarmed isnt the word but I was not expecting what I thought to be a gimmick account posting+ #+in such mean spirits #It could also be the humor of these people im not fully understanding; ive seen people who are just very rude to each other+ #+but are friends about it and fine with it #idk! weird story in my life #idk I guess Mario and sonic aproces guy know each other or something

[arinmoss]

Lilith wip (he/him!)

#oc #original character #i never posted this here i guess lol #anyways heres my guy Lilith he has a terrible personality and works at some shitty jo bin a seaside town and meets this mermaid creature #life for him gets weird idk it story is v vague as of right now lmao #i just know that he used to be kind of a normal character but then iw as like what if he was kinda horrible #anyways this wip is VERY old and im very mad i never got to finish it cause there is so much i want to fix -____- #anyways i love giving my boys long hair and a bang moment lmao #prettyfying every oc i have #hes also missing earrings -__- #art #digital art #sketch #wip #work in progress #trans oc #trans masc #trans man? maybe? stilll figuring that out #in the story itself hes explorign that sorta thing idk maybe he's a dude but like only a little lol #who knows man

[katierosefun]

my cancelled-able trait from the queer community would be that i really apparently love messy endings. i love u happy endings and i also love u such sad, messy, ambiguous endings . . . i love u endings where u have this weird pit in the bottom of your stomach because you know that there's love here but u have no idea what to do with it and u just have to deal with the fact that someone is profoundly affecting your life and you're not gonna get closure from it anytime soon . . . i love u queer love stories where it's really just "u don't always get to see the sunshine and rainbows at the end of it . . . sometimes all that's left is just one big question mark and the quiet hope that they get their shit together" . . .

#caroline talks #don't get me wrong. i love u happy endings. esp when it comes to queer love stories #but i also just. love endings where it's just like. well. u DON'T know for certain whether the characters #are truly going to ride off into the sunset together. #the only thing u know for certain is that they love each other and that they're going to have to grapple with that forever. #maybe it's also just bc like. idk. i took too many film classes and so my head's forever stuck #on this one essay about how some really happy endings feel lifeless. #like how in some ending shots. the characters look like they've had their happy ending. but there's also some weird unease and confusion #and it's like. well yeah. because for every happy moment u get in life. u are still already thinking 'well what's next. what now.' #which is fascinating to me. but also me @ me: god maybe u can just be happy and it's not that deep. #but also. i do love the wonderful ambiguity of just. 'there is so much more to live. so much more to do.' #and i guess it's not just for queer love stories. i think a lot about the ending of my mister. #with lee ji an and park dong hoon walking away from each other but they're happy. u have no idea how their relationship will pan out but u #do know that they love each other. #or like. columbus. with jin and casey. they hug each other and thank each other for being in the other's lives. #and jin says goodbye to casey and casey says goodbye to jin and u have no idea if they'll see each other again. but u know they love each #other so very much. even if they'd only known each other for a second. #or like. beginners. anna and oliver love each other so much and u get this sense that. they're still a little bit uneasy/nervous about how #the rest of their lives are going to go. but they'll try. #or. god. the swearing jar. #the last shot. i think about it a lot. #there is love!!! but u don't always know how the rest of it is going to pan out!!! u just know that it'll pan out somehow!

[swatato]

I refuse to believe a damn thing I’m seeing thanks <3

#noragami #noragami spoilers #like this just spits in the face of all the themes and messages of the entire story #idk how hiyori being yatos shinki could possibly benefit the narrative #like do they just go home after this and begin the entire cycle of protecting a shinki from ggs again? #or does she conveniently get to remember everything too cuz of some asspull and then they live happily ever after?.? #the whole point was that hiyori should live a full long life #whats the point of yato rising up to father if he just gets ‘taught a lesson’ yet again #and nora too for that matter im just waiting for some payoff after that entire bond she formed with hiyori #like this is just the dumbest way to go out especially for how rushed it is #its so absurd which is why i dont entirely believe this is actually hiyori kicking the can #surely adachitoka gonna pull something here dhsifnksjf #im betting amaterasu will pull some magic cuz a) yato keeping his promise to kill father #and b) something something about a loophole with hiyoris unique half dead status #and the fact that theyre in father weird abstract water dimension #jumbled thoughts ghhhgghh #like im yatori garbage to my core but this aint it

[sarumint]

pop!

#hunter x hunter #kurapika kurta #leorio paladiknight #leopika #hxh fanart #art #i was a hardcore leopika fan back in 2020 and now I’m back in the pit #1999 had me screaming and crying #and the drama cds⁉️ #even looking back at my leopika art from 3 years ago had me maniacally laughing in my room #I have so much old hxh art in my little shoe box it was mentally HEALING looking through them again #it was clear how much I loved hxh and honestly I’m so glad I got into it again #I was just 15 when I drew all those silly things but why does it feel like it was just yesterday #I started this acc when I was 16 so most of my oldest drawings on here was made when I was just 16 #and now I’m 18??this is so weird idk why I’m rambling about my age rn but life just flies too fast #I don’t like it #I just wanna be in my room drawing away my self indulgence #and daydream about stories I’ll write later #and decorate my silly room and dress myself up in the mirror #I am NOT built for society

[everye]

tw blood, gore

My Heaven

sh1 locations usually don't get much recognition so i feel like adding some explanatory notes on it (just in case)

the place is the secret chamber in Green Lion Antiques where distracted from prayer alessa is having a tender moment gazing at the point where God's painting is supposed to be

(GOD- IM TRULY BEWITCHED BY THIS GAME THE WAY IT NEVER THROWS STRAIGHT FACTS IN UR FACE AND WISELY KEEPS ATMOSPHERE OF UNDERSTATEMENT TILL THE VERY END SO FKING CHARMING–)

whatever ceremonial stuff it is, it had started to burn before one of harry's passing out

and due to perspective in my drawing alessa stands directly on it ..

i'd like to sum up the post w little art comparison bc i also pursued the goal to redraw one of my old drawings

the first one is pretty rough for sure still luv both of them tho

june 2021 august 2022

seems like i had come to better understanding of what im trying to achieve in terms of composition COLORS and whatnot

ьььь

#silent hill #alessa gillespie #dahlia gillespie #unnamed members of the Order. dahlia's gang in short #incubator #incubus #since it's his actual birth scene #damn haven't posted anything serious in a while .. time during summer when i was deciding on ideas for zine almost feels like a past life #made the choice for a reason y'all already know how Normal i am abt sh1 <33 #although people tend to associate it exclusively w harry or/and lisa which IS fine still sad alessa rarely gets any credit............ #prolly mentioned it before idk but at the very core it's HER game #meanwhile harry is just a witness who brings us into the loop of the story #(not mocking anyone !! tho in that case harry is basically player's eyes and ears) #drawing special attention to My Heaven soundtrack game's ost is hella gud in general but this one f u c k s #oh the moment when i just realized those weird noises are actually roar of alessa's intense s c r e a m s on horribly twisted frequencies #and the God himself is grotesque embodiment of her mental and physical suffering #not to be dramatic but back then i came to sudden realization that i'll never be the same............. #tw blood #tw gore #my art

[rimouskis]

okay it's not weird to be weirded out by many people at my new workplace following each other on Instagram, right? but not only like, coworkers who are friends (normal) but employees who are actively part of each other's management structures (like. the head of X department following and being followed by people who work directly under her. that's weird right).

#idk i LOVED my first ever manager but we had clear work life boundaries and we didn't become insta friends until after she left the job #I've followed a few people at my new gig but not my manager even tho she's fine and I'd friend her later. but like..... she is my boss. #I'm not gonna let her see my insta stories?? #it's weird to me

[octal-alchemist]

that 2am existentialism is hitting hard today

#like im thinking abt my favorite rock i lost when i was in highschool. i think i know #where i dropped it so there's a weird urge to go get it but i literally cant? #i cant go to that place any more. and it's changed a lot in the last 12 years #I'm thinking of so many little details of things and places I've been and may never go again #thought about an old picture of my mom and had the dumb thought of ' i wonder when shell drag us to the gorge again ' #my moms been dead more than 10yrs #I'm reading omniscient reader's viewpoint rn and thinking #about memories and stories and . idk. loss #this current life isnt bad but it is so FAKE compared to how i spent 17 years #how is it 10 years ago that everything changed?

[radiation]

(Some people will kill me for this) I watched Neon Genesis Eva back in 2021-ish and the more I think about the show the worse the show gets, I think its a very pretty show, Especially with the strain the animators were put under. But the character writing is pretty awful regarding all of the women in the show, and even disregarding misogyny as a element (Which it IS) The show builds so much momentum just to do nothing with it, This show has a lot of potential it throws away to focus on asuka or whoever shoving her ass in the camera. The themes of human connection are surface level at the best and misguided especially for a audience of 14 year olds at the worst.

Its such a mixed bag I enjoy talking about mostly cause I can find no one who agrees with me, half of the people I encounter just enjoy the cool art anyway and I can get behind that, I just find it impossible to ignore the many many issues with the writing.

.

#Yeah I agree the show did not do it for me at all #I can usually roll my eyes and ignore fanservice but with such a serious story and such emotionally fucked young characters #It felt so so so deeply fucking scummy it near singlehandedly ruined the whole thing for me. Other weird writing shit on top of it too #I liked end of evangelion a lot tho #Maybe I’ll do a rewatch someday but idk I also feel that the themes feel a lot more surface level than ppl make them out to be #I’m sure that stuff is really appropriate powerful for someone at a different stage of their life than me #But Im not that person so I’m like…Well yeah. Feel it’s hard to connect to if you’re not A Shinji. Banks on a sizeable amount of projection #Art is beautiful thoigh and has tons of things I do really enjoy but. Man idk #Sonny Boy does for me emotionally everything that evangelion was intended to. I’d rather just rewatch that

[bookshelf-in-progress]

Success! I told someone in real life about one of my fantasy story concepts, and they didn't act like I was crazy!

#maybe she thought i was idk #but she was engaging with it #asking follow-up questions #noting parallels #i think it helped that i pitched it one weird concept at a time #like 'it's just after wwi and this guy's kind of a psychic' #'and then he had to go to war' #'and he's very aware of the fact that everyone he helped to kill was a person with an entire inner life' #'he's staying with his friend and doesn't want to see his family' #'because they're all mind readers too and would know all the stuff he's done' #and once she grasped that part i could bring in the mouse shapeshifter #and she seemed to get the appeal #and i could talk about how i accidentally gave myself emotions about these two #i'm pretty sure she's the first real-life person i've ever mentioned this story to #and the weirder part isn't that i haven't mentioned it after so long #but that i mentioned it at all #because this is one of my most convoluted concepts #so the lack of outward disdain was a nice moment

[heymacy]

okay fINE i'll just say it!! i miss fandom!!

#i know i'm still like. AROUND. but it's different #ofc it's different #idk man #things don't click and clack in my brain the way they used to #which is probably a good thing all things considered bc we were in a bit of a pickle mentally there for a hot minute #but goodness gracious i miss the community of it all and the freakouts and the emotional meltdowns over Some Guy(s) #it was FUN #it IS fun #and there is nothing saying i can't reblog shamey stuff whenever the fancy happens to strike me #bc it is not that serious and it ultimately doesn't matter what i do bc life is just one small blip in the grand oblivion of it all #but i feel like making a french exit and then swooping back in is a bit of a weird move lmfao #anyway #this is all to say that i'm thinking about them today #i'm thinking about their love and their story and the way that they were literally the blueprint and completely unmatched on all levels #and it's driving me a little mad #maybe i'll make some gifs #we'll see where the day takes me #okay that's all goodbye

[cyncerity]

can any of y’all give me quick dsmp vore art prompts so i can make doodles, i wanna draw so bad but my head is literally empty

random characters, stuff from my aus, stuff from your aus or other aus that you like, specific or non-specific prompts, i’ll take anything as long as it’s g/t

#please i’m so bored and i’m in such a weird mood #like i’ve just been reading vore stories all day idk what i’m doing with my life #i’m in college and i have two exams Monday but that ain’t the mindset rn vore is #also- #only other exception is no That Guy #y’all know who #cyncerity #mcyt gt #mcyt g/t #tw vore

[clevervonskelli]

Okay, so hear me out:

The showrunners have made this the Buck & Bucky Show and made all the changes or narrative choices with the result of (at times, purposefully) sacrificing both authenticity and storytelling for a guaranteed, uber-shippable pair who will compensate for any criticism against the show by drawing in a solid number of people interested in watching the two gorgeous leads make eyes at and sacrifice for each other. That's why they're purposefully going with (what looks like it's going to be) a very typical "I'll stall, you go, save yourself!!" situation compared to the boring truth* of one of them being put in charge of security on the march.

*Lies!! IMO there is SO MUCH nuance to Egan being unable to run away from the march with Cleven simply bc he had the responsibility of military order and leadership to deal with.

#this was defo the most unhinged of my notes app ramblings from the other night #MotA #idk man I try real hard not to be an “umm actually...” party pooper but some things they change make no sense #and some things they change make sense but feel so insulting bc its like none of us are intelligent enough to enjoy the show otherwise #I may also just be grouchy about it bc I like the unbearable nature of simple bureaucratic things throwing a spanner in the works for peopl #its so real! not every WWII story needs a big hero moment sometimes weird or annoying things happen bc the military is just Like That #spoilers #for real life #masters of the air #MotA: Episode 8

[dahldahlbills]

I really need to get serious about personal projects again

#I think I said something like this last year too lol #currently in a weird headspace about it #the biggest reason why I lost focus on them was bc I prioritized engaging in fandom #(something that I never really did when I was focused on publishing a few years back) #so part of me feels like in order to make considerable progress on projects again I need to cut myself off from fandom #and I kinda have been weening myself off a bit from animanga but not really for that reason #it was mostly bc I was getting overwhelmed by how much I was consuming and I wanted to appreciate things fully #I don’t think I’d cut myself off from fandom completely either I’d still try to keep up with stuff #but the idea of not engaging in fandom anymore kinda.. scares me? #idk I feel like a major loser admitting this lol #it just feels like I’d lose a lot of connections with people #and would lose a lot of the love I have for stories if I’m not actively interacting with them :( #and then there’s also that stupid feeling of being a ‘fake fan’ because I’m not dedicating every single second of free time to fandom #which is dumb bc like I have a life and need to make money yknow I got things to do #im just Stressed bc I’m at such a critical stage career wise and im getting closer to 26 so hhhhh healthcare coverage will be up in the air #so I really can’t afford to dawdle #there’s just so much I wanna do and while I’m not necessarily racing to get it done I still want to take advantage of the time I have #but it also sucks feeling like I’m giving up a part of myself to progress on another part of myself #I don’t think any of this makes sense sorry I just needed to dump my thoughts bc I am Terrified™️ #anyway personal projects! gotta get back to those ! #blahblahbills #delete later

[tj-crochets]

Weird story from work today! Apparently contractors called my boss and complained about a very specific untrue thing

Today at work I got a call from my boss. “Hey TJ,” she said “you’re not in trouble, but I’ve been getting some feedback from some of the contractors you work with, and I want to run it by you. They said you never answer your phone and are only available by email or text.” I said “That’s weird. I’ve been on the phone with contractors pretty much constantly today. I do tell the contractors that if I don’t answer a call, it’s probably because I am on another call, and if they text or email me their question I might be able to answer while I am on the other call” “I thought it was something like that. There’s always someone who will call twenty times a day, and you answer the first nineteen, then he’ll call your boss when you don’t answer the twentieth call of the day.” She said, and we both kind of chuckled. “Also, I heard from one of the contractors that you told them never to call you” “What?” “They said you told them you couldn’t answer calls because it would disturb your new baby. You don’t have a new baby, right?” “Not that I know of?????” “Yeah, I thought you would have announced it” Easily one of the most bizarre phone calls of my professional life, but my boss was nice about it!

#the person behind the yarn #tj talks about work #idk what else to tag this as??? weird work story? #contractors assuming weird things about my personal life??? #my boss was SUPER nice about it though. after she'd gone over the feedback with me #she said I was doing a great job and asked for any feedback I had about the new contractors our company has been working with #had another long weird work story happen #but cutting it way short: someone accused me of screaming at them when they had in fact been screaming at me #and my boss said 'have you MET tj? I don't think she's ever yelled at someone in her life. I don't think she could!' #and initially I was like hey I could yell at people if I want to! and then I thought about it and I think she might be right????? #idk if I've ever actually yelled at someone?? I have occasional used the slightly raised parental voice #mostly in a DON'T EAT THAT kind of context with toddlers #but that's not yelling it's just firm. if you yell you panic and if you panic with toddlers they panic #or they laugh at you. could go either way #anyway got sidetracked point is: told my dad #and he said 'I'm proud of all my grandchildren. Even the fictional ones'

[monotonous-minutia]

Finally putting the Christmas decorations away. It feels like spring outside which is unnerving mid February so I've got the winter scene going on youtube.

Also thanks Hoopla for having all the Classical Kids albums (including a new one I've never heard) so I can relive my childhood this weekend

#random #currently have a cold which makes everything suck but at least we got music #feels weird to be wishing for winter weather but having it be in the 50s in Wisconsin in February is like a bad omen #idk maybe im just cynical #anyway that's my life story how have y'all been