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#if the emojis didnt make it obvious lol
poopingonthefloor · 1 year
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youu sshhould tell some headcanons u got for jack dave n henry if u want ofc
OK SURE! *glass shattering sound* (Some of these are not "headcanons" or are technically implied to be canon but im just going to list all of my specific perceptions regarding the character)
Long list down bellow. vvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvv
-Dave and Jack both have adhdtism and borderline personality disorder. (((I also want to use this opportunity to apologize for any previous ignorance/rudeness i may have responded with before I'm a bitch but erm I am improving. so yeh also yeah i can definitely see Jack being autistic now too which i know i said i dont really see. it turns out my symptoms i projected onto him were also autistic symptoms so um...))) -Jack is a dog person, Dave doesnt have an animal prefrence but dogs suit him the best because he's dependent and sensitive and dogs love unconditionally, Henry has no feelings about animals however he dislikes dogs in particular. -Henry likes cartoon bears the best though. only cartoon versions.
-I imagine Dave as a child wasn't necessarily BULLIED by other orphans but he was treated poorly and excluded. Adult carers would try to befriend him but he was a "problem child" as a kid and didn't comprehend human boundaries (he never learned) so he made adults uncomfortable too. -I stole this one but if Dave was a cat he'd be a lykoi. henry would be a maine coon (jack is a default shorthair but i give him folded ears sometimes for fun) -My Dave was born purple (and also Henry is born pink) for reasons similar to Doggo's "why is henry's eyes evil" explanation. It's just different ways of their "evil" manifesting -- Dave's eyes are normal as a child however because obviously he isnt "evil" as a child, I imagine his soul is just weird and that he's never been fully normal. (because I'm not a fan of "x character if bad thing never happened" worlds where the character is basically just a normal person. Like its just more interesting if they were always an outcast/unusual from birth. Also it just makes more sense for Dave's character since he is never shown to be normal in any way even in the flipside LOL....also because Dave is often described as "not exactly human")
-Henry however just quickly grew to be jaded and resentful of anyone and anything living. Either from his dad or just that being his personality (but I prefer both). He wasn't outcast and he got along with people when he felt like it but he just hated everyone. -However I imagine Henry always had a childish side to him that enjoys more cartoon artistry and performance. -Henry and Dave gesture similarly when expressing excitement/enthusiasm, though Henry gestures very little most of the time. Henry either expresses exaggeratedly and cartoonishly (but comes across condescending) or not at all.
-Jack likes to watch TV but Dave does not and finds sitting still and watching pictures on a screen boring. (Though certain movies/shows are an exception) -Back when Dave still had simple desires/pleasures (before the lobotomy) he always wanted to have a pet but animals always hated him (because he didn't know how to handle them gently).
-Henry has no romantic or sexual desires whatsoever. He had a wife and child simply because Martha confidently expressed interest on him and he decided to lie to her. The only motive really involved was the societal standard of having a family/having a kid to continue his legacy (but henry didn't really need that to spread his didnt he lol..)
-Alongside that Dave is pansexual and Jack is bisexual (with a prefrence to men) but those are obvious -Dave appears stiff however can contort his body disturbingly (flexible), Jack is normal and appears in great condition for a corpse... (mostly due to makeup (nail polish emoji))
Ok thats all for now so I don't make this post longer than LONG. thank you for asking my headcanons though. ^__^ I love being crazy and sharing my opinions!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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steelycunt · 1 year
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peter pettigrew! ☕️
ooh good one. okay firstly i do not like him being removed from the marauders. i understand why people do it but i think to pretend he was never really a part of the marauders undermines his betrayal? the whole point is that it was the betrayal of a friend. like they didnt make sirius the secret keeper because it was too obvious but they would not have picked someone they did not trust/barely knew. i think it is boring and easy to pretend he wasnt actually apart of the group and i find it soo much more interesting when hes included. i sympathise with him as a young boy and obviously lose that sympathy for him by the time he gets older but. idk i think he has sort of had the opposite treatment to regulus. regulus has been completely morally purified so that he's more easily uwu-ified whereas peter has been completely condemned and removed from the narrative so that people dont have to deal with writing/engaging with him? and honestly i think a lot of that stems from fatphobia honestly lol the uwu-ification of tom riddle and evan rosier and barty crouch and the uwu-ification of draco because people had a hard-on for tom felton (which. take a good long look at yourself please) and the desperate charge to refute regulus' being canonically less handsome than sirius (because apparently the whole moral purification thing isnt as high on the agenda for characters who arent conventionally attractive and fancast as timothee chalament) and the movement stops at peter? why is that? oh i wonder. why ever could that be. anyway yeah i think whether you like him or hate him (and i personally do neither) hes a pretty interesting character especially in his capacity to act as a perspective on the dynamics of the others and i really enjoyed writing for his pov in owt!!
send me a topic + ☕️ emoji and i’ll tell my honest opinion about it!
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vanillatalc · 9 months
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had a bit of a cry on ben earlier bc im feeling v isolated from everyone atm + watching him like being super fun + sociable with all the friends i had first (to be clear i love that he's involved lol i just feel like at one point i was much more central + have slowly moved backwards from it all) is like. kind of shit bc i just am feeling so separate from it all but more saliently i also dont rly feel like socialising at all + i just feel like blah and unmotivated to really talk to anyone + i feel like its harder to perform cool shiny cham irl/on VC (where a lot of te current stuff is happening now) and i just like :| dont think im fun enough outside of text bc like. idk it's harder to "perform", as i said. not sure if this is a pandemic hangover or wedding stress or what but yeah im finding it all a bit much + hard + it doesnt help they all keep doing things that im really not interested in (god bless them) like dnd (hate it) bass (i play piano) album listening parties (not really a fan of listening to music in this way), book club (haven't read a book in over 10y), and whilst being fully aware i actually could partake in most of these i just feel like they all have so much in common and like... i am Also Here lol with interests that barely intersect at all with The Group's
le sigh, we cringe on
ben got a bit emotional as well bc he didnt like seeing me so upset (grimace emoji) and agreed that i used to be much more involved w/ stuff + that he misses me doing stuff with The Group. he also asked about my fluoxetine dosage bc we both think it's helpful for some things (obsessive thoughts/behaviours WAY better on it than off it) but tbh i dont really think it makes a diff wrt mood except as a by-product of the obsessions
then ben read me some matsuo basho (not sure why he's reading "the most famous poet of the edo period" atm bc usually he's on like sci fi and shit haha) and that was nice
i have another tina appt tmr and i guess ill talk about the above :/
in more generic complaining i also have a fuck ton of work to do in the next few weeks before i take a week off, for obvious reasons
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moesartblog · 3 years
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if anyone else is interested bc im dumb
the lockers and notes
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in order from right to left:
Varys rly likes basketball. Thats about all i can make out. Maybe theres specific sports teams referenced but i wouldnt know sorry. 
Aina and her hat. the sticky note i think says “you are STRONG”. She has heart eyes and sunglasses emoji stickers, an offbrand barbie sticker, and a sticker that says inter net in netflix font.
Lucia, of the stickers, she has a bunch of candy ones, one that references Nerds, one that references jelly belly, and one that references Atari, Im not familiar with the rest. (if you know pls share!)
Remi. Nerd.
I like to think lucia got all of them their stickers.
now inside
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more basketball stuff. but also is that a dress shirt?
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thermos and i assume a makeup pouch on the shelf. i assume a page torn from a magazine, a ticket to a show called SWEAT, a photo of aina with heris, fuzzy pink mirror. a picture of aina and i assume a few other friends of hers. i cant make out what the writing says on it. under it looks like an album cover of some kind, and then the division poster (not sure if its a reference or not). and then the thanks! sticker and i could just barely make out the little white sticker that i think says “After this, we’re getting cake”.
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ok! lets see how many of these i can make out in order lol: Ranch Daritas (Cool Ranch Doritos), Cheetas (cheetos), Daritas red hot (Flaming hot doritos or whatever the really hot ones are called), Daritas sour cream (obvious at this point), premium potato chips (Tims potato chips. Had to look this one up a bit), Slice (?) (the closest i could come up with is deep river sweet maui onion chips), pop cookie (idk if theres a specific one), idk about the next two :( , W&W ( i think this is obvious), MilkyWay (this one is more obvious), skettles, Hyper!, Trigger (uh huh), Harmony (my fav candy bar the hersheys cookies n cream bar), idk, Crackers (those austin cheddar cheese crackers), this one just has a skull on it but its evil 5 hour energy, some mints, i think this one just says upper lol (brand looks familiar but i cant place it, and then rainbow nerds. and at the very bottom u can just kinda see raisins. hoo
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remi with his horndog schtick of course with a sports illustrated cover, and then a pic of him and i assume his (now) alligator girlfriend tucked behind.
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and then galos covered in matoi stickers and other things i THINK are Edo period things. I think that thing at the front is a bell? i could be entirely wrong sorry if i am. 
if you know any of the stuff i didnt know pls say! this was just a silly scavenger hunt for myself
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ebonysquib · 2 years
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For the ask game - Super Mario and/or Sly Cooper?
since i love and rarely get attention like this i shall answer for both series >:)
Give me a fandom and I’ll tell you:
Super Mario Series
Favorite Male Character:
oh jeez i have to choose. um probably bowser. him or luigi and mario. i just like them. they are swell chaps.
Favorite Female Character:
in case it wasn't obvious; princess peach. i've always liked her since i was baby. i do like all the other female charcters like daisy, pauline, and rosalina but i like peach most of all uwu
Least Favorite Character:
mmm i dont think i have one??? if i had to choose then i guess yoshi??? i like yoshi of course i mean who doesn't but i honestly don't understand the appeal of him ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Favorite Ship:
princess peach with daisy, pauline, or rosalina. just princess peach x girls is thumbs up emoji ya know
Favorite Friendship:
bowser and his relationship with the main gang. like yeah i cause trouble for yall every week but im still invited to the golf club. i like that.
another one would be rosalina and mario. like rosalina didn't have to help mario at all in galaxy but she did and i just think thats sweet of her. i just think theyd make cool friends too.
Favorite Quote:
"So long, gay bowser!"
"Open salami!"
"May the stars shine down on you."
and honestly rosalina's whole speech at the end of galaxy. along with bowser and jr talking at the end of sunshine was cute too.
Worst Character Death (if any):
BABY LUMA. AND ALL THE OTHER LITTLE LUMAS THAT JOIN HIM.
when fludd breaks down thats sad too but she ends up all right in the end.
This Made Me So Happy You Have No Idea Moment:
The ending of super mario galaxy. its a good one yeah.
and all the characters you meet and help along the way during the thousand year door that come and save you in your most desperate moment was awesome too!
Saddest Moment:
BABY LUMA.
Rosalina's storybook too of course.
Favorite Location:
anywhere in super mario sunshine. that game is special to me.
i always liked the look of noki bay the most. i loved the purple water i thought it was so pretty. even tho its purple cuz its polluted orz but thats besides the point djvnskjd.
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Sly Cooper Series
Favorite Male Character:
its a tie between sly, bentley and murray. i can't choose between the three of them! tho I also really adore Muggshot. He's just so endearing and charming to me lol
Favorite Female Character:
probably penelope. idk i just related to her a lot as a kid.
i like carmelita too but thats more like "i have a crush on you/im in love with you" kind of like lol
Least Favorite Character:
general tsao. and LeFwee. they just irritated me. they're probably the least likeable of all the villains. they are just bad cuz they suck. the other villains have a reason and a background and character and are just far more likeable.
Favorite Ship:
Sly x Carmelita of course uwu. its a classic. Bentley x Penelope as a close second of course.
tho i am interested in other ships too! like i prefer the main gang (sly, bentley, murray) as family but they'd be interesting as a romantic couple too! sly and neyla and sly and penelope are fun too. like in both cases they didnt happen for obvious reasons but i like to think on how those relationships would have played out if they worked out.
Favorite Friendship:
the cooper gang of course. i'm talking the main three but also i like the friendships between the other members that are added to the gang in 3. like murray and penelope had a cute little friendship i think. and i like to see the main 3 interacting with other characters besides each other.
Favorite Quote:
OMG SO MANY BUT HERES A FEW
"There's no honor, no challenge, no fun in stealing from ordinary people. You rip off a master criminal, then you know you're a master thief."
"What, are you kidding? You break into my place, steal my stuff, trash the joint. I feel transgressed and violated. Let's rock!"
"Ah, well, that's where you're wrong: the Thievius Raccoonus doesn't create great thieves, it takes great thieves to create the Thievius Raccoonus!"
"Inspector Fox, as beautiful and unpredictable as ever."
"Crime? I haven't stolen anything...yet."
"THAT DOES IT! I'll floss my teeth with your spine!"
"I'm about to head inside the vault... and I want you and Murray to come with me. We're a team, a family. We should do this together."
And it kinda doesn't count cuz it's not from the game but rather from Dev Madan and it's only part of the quote too not all of it but:
"I also believe what has kept Sly resonating with people is that while it may look like a simple and colorful show for kids at a first glance, there are some deeper issues to friendship that the guys deal with: the idea of loss, sacrifice, revenge, romance to name a few. These are things that a younger player might not immediately understand while playing the game, and in some cases even challenge them, but because of that, I think it’s something that stays with them and as they get older, return to and appreciate on a completely different level. At its heart the Sly Cooper gang is about creating lifelong relationships and having crazy adventures with your pals."
And of course I love the sillier ones too but then this would go one for too long lol. So these are just a few ;)
Worst Character Death (if any):
arpeggio. not cuz it made me cry or anything but like. how unfair it was. he didn't deserve that :(
otherwise i cant think of another death that bothered me. the majority of the deaths in the game are often well deserved or happen to charcters (like sly's dad) that we never got to form a bond with so.
This Made Me So Happy You Have No Idea Moment:
I really love the ending for sly 3. Like I would have loved a new game in the series cuz I love these characters and their stories but I'm also completely fine if it just ended like it did with the 3rd game. It's a happy resolution to me. I just thought sly giving up like, pretty much everything, to be with Carmelita was so sweet. And I like that Bentley and Murray know that this is something sly has wanted for some time so they are just happy for him and Carmelita.
I also believe that Carmelita knew sly was faking his amnesia. They've known each other for so long I think they can sorta figure out when one is lying or not. And Carmelita sounds too happy and too eager for sly to just have amnesia all of a sudden. because even tho it's not spoken between the two, they know he is just using it as an excuse so they can finally be together. And then sly 4 ruined it. :)
Saddest Moment:
Probably the ending to sly 2 and sly 3. They are both kinda bittersweet endings I think but thats what I like about them.
Favorite Location:
Aw jeez. I don't really have a favorite location for 1 like they are all nice levels but that's it for me. For 2 I would have to say the first level Paris and then rajan's ball, along with the Canadian levels cuz they are just so damn pretty and I like ice and stuff. I'm a northerner I love that snowy cold as fuck shit it feels like home. The other levels are cool too (especially arpeggios blimp that's fucking poggers) but they don't arent my most favorite like the ones I first listed. As for 3 I love Venice. It's just so pretty and I love the music and I just think it's a great first episode for the series. Other than that probably the cooper vault. Like not the entirety of Kane island just the inside of the vault that is so much fun dudes.
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olliscowizz · 3 years
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High Ground - Olli Matela FF Part 2
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Hiya je suis back. :) Hope I didnt leave y'all waiting too long. I dont have work the next two weeks so be prepared for at least one more update. LOL
Olli
Olli didn’t know he would be fascinated so fast by a human being. But Sara managed to fuck with his head. While he was laying in bed, he couldn’t help but to think about her and her eyes, and her hair. He was just mesmerized by her. After a few hours of just thinking about her, he managed to fall into a restless sleep. To say Olli was grumpy was putting it lightly. Never was a person more in a bad mood. He couldn’t sleep and it didn’t help, that his thoughts were still circling around Sara. “Good morning!”, screamed Joel, when he entered the room, Sara behind him. What were they doing together? “Run into her, when I picked up our coffees. She doesn’t like coffee! Can you believe this? But she’s drinking her third Red Bull already”, Joel couldn’t be helped and he just rambeled. How could a person be this motivated in the morning? Olli would never get it. “So for today. Lets just keep songwriting”, Niko said and they all agreed. After three hours of intense working, their heads were smoking and they almost couldn’t concentrate anymore. “Lets take a break”, to all of their surprise, it was Sara who said this. “Actually, its already one o’clock. Lets take the rest of the day off”, Sara continued and managed to surprised all of them. Yesterday she didn’t want to go out and drink beer with them, and now she suggested, that they should take the rest of the day off? Olli looked at the other boys and noticed that they were as perplexed as he was. “Well what else do you want to do?”, asked Joonas. “I figured, that if we don’t get along really well, this song will not do as good as we all hope it will.”, she explained. Of course it was about the song. Olli watched as Sara put a strand of her short hair behind her ears and smiled to himself. She was cute. Definitely. “Okay. Agreed”, Tommi chirped in. “But that doesn’t answer the question what we should do”, argued Aleksi and we all nodded in agreement. “Since I am not from Finland, how about you guys show me around”, Sara suggested and they all said yes.
Sara
Sara noticed that the boys were all really stressed. She on the other hand wanted to get out of the studio, because the air was getting bad. She walked a few paces behind them and just looked at the beautiful architecture. The houses were build different than back in her hometown in Scotland. Tommi was walking beside her and explained her everything that he knew. She was thankful. The guys didn’t treat her as the star that she was. They treated her as a normal human being. Something she wasn’t used to. “So after all this walking”, Joel started after they were walking for one hour. “We should grab a beer in this bar”, he pointed to a bar while he was finishing his sentence. The guys immediately agreed. Sara started to panic. She couldn’t ditch them once again. But if her manager found out that they weren’t working he would kill Sara. He would already be mad, if he would find out, that they were out and about in the city. “ehm…”, Sara started but couldn’t finish her sentence, cause they all looked at her with puppy-eyes. How could she say no to that? “Okay. One beer wont kill me”, she said and followed them inside. While Joel und Niko were ordering beer for everyone, Sara followed the rest of them to the tables and sat down next to Olli.
Olli
He froze once she sat down next to him. He started to feel how his palms were getting sweaty. Keep cool. He thought to himself and tried to secretly rub his hands dry on his pants. The other two returned with their beer and they all started drinking. After everyone had two beer more the mood started to get more comfortable and they all talked freely with each other. Olli even put his arm on the chair behind Sara. She didn’t seem to mind it, as she sometimes, when she thought nobody would notice lean her back against his arm. Olli of course noticed an couldn’t help but smile to himself whenever she did that. Olli had a few beers and couldn’t help it an started to draw small circles on Sara’s shoulderblades. He just hoped the other guys wouldn’t notice it but they too had a few beers. He felt the chills running down Sara’s spine and smirked. It seemed like he wasn’t the only one who felt a attraction towards the other person. He was confirmed in his thinking, when he felt a small hand land on his leg. They continued their small touching until Niko abruptly got up, Olli immediately took his hand off of Saras shoulder and played it cool. He didn’t want Niko to think something wrong. Sara wasn’t bothered in the slightest. She kept her hand on Ollis leg and started to slowly caress it. Olli took a sharp breath, and coughed to cover it up. What was she doing with him? No woman ever was this bold with him. He liked it. After five more minutes of her just caressing his leg and him not being able to form a single thought she stopped her movement and took her hand away. “Its getting late guys”, she stated the obvious. “I should go and sleep and sleep a few hours before we continue with the song”, she said and got up from the table. The other guys offered to walk her to her hotel, but she politely declined their offers. And then she walked out the door. “Olli are you okay? You’ve been staring at the door for five minutes now!”, Joonas pulled him out of his thought. Was he okay? “Yeah everythings good”, he said and smiled at his friend. Was he really okay? She managed to completely fuck with his head now, just because she caressed his leg a little bit. Fuck. He couldn’t help but think about what would’ve happened if they were alone. “Is somebody crushing on Sara?”, Joonas of course noticed the shift in behavior of his friend and didn’t miss a opportunity to mess with him. “No! I don’t even know her!”, he defended himself and drank his beer empty. “I am going home too”, he stated and got up from the table without waiting for their answer.
Sara
In the taxi, she leaned her head against the window and thought about the evening. Why did she do that to Olli? Of course he is very attractive but there was no need for her to put her hand on his leg and just fucking leave it there! She was confused. No one ever made her feel that way. But she couldn’t afford to be in a relationship. It would end her career. And there was nothing more important than her career! When she arrived in her hotelsuite, she wasn’t surprised to find her manager sitting on a chair. “Where were you?”, he asked her. “Out with the guys from Blind Channel. I was getting to know them, since songwriting would be easier like that”, she explained him. Took fresh clothes and went into the bathroom to shower. She couldn’t be bothered with him right now. “Just make sure you don’t get too close to them”, he shouted through the door and he could hear another door close. He must have left. After showering she went into her bed, and tried to fall asleep. But sleep didn’t come, so she grabbed her phone and searched all the Blind Channel guys on Instagram and followed them. Olli was the last. She didn’t just follow him she also pressed on the Direct Message button. -Sorry for leaving so fast, but I need my sleep-, she texted him. Without any emojis or anything. It wasn’t long until she got her answer. -Don’t worry. I also left soon after you went home. Hope we didn’t creep you out too much :’)- he texted her back and she couldn’t help but smile. They were all so nice, they could never creep her out, she thought and texted Olli this. And while they were texting over small and big thing they both fell asleep with a smile on their face, with thoughts on the other person.
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some thoughts on ÉLITE s4 immediately after finishing it
MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD, obviously
so. i have some thoughts.
i really disliked how they kept on piling up problem upon problem and i’ve seen that a couple dozen times by now and it always ends the same - nothing gets solved. Not really, anyway. The solution usually is; another problem happens, but its bigger and far more important and severe than all of the other ones combined and it overshadows everything that had happened before.
on that note, and to be fair, this is a teen’s drama show. So i don’t mind it, just to be clear here. i enjoyed the heck out of this season, right now, it’s my favorite season of all. That might change later, as all of this still is so new and fresh and exciting so my mind naturally snaps onto it.
first things first; Omander went just like i predicted - they broke up just so they could get back together eventually, after some hardcore drama. (i cried anyway. a lot.)
there’s one character i liked throughout the whole season. no, wait, two actually. first is rebeka. i feel like her decisions made sense. i liked her story arch a lot. the second one is azucena. what a queen.
.........guzman has a really bad temper. always had and probably always will. (to the samu/guzman/ari drama; why couldnt they have a pretty threesome, ari was quite obviously polyamorous (but i guess nobody has ever heard of that lol) and samuel and guzman almost fucked any second anyways so what exactly was their problem)
surprisingly enough, i liked Patrick in a lot of moments, about 50%. i absolutely despised him in the other 50%. tbh im really not sure about his character like with him, i don’t see any reasoning or goal or whatsoever. i have no clue what he wants to achieve?? guess he just wants to be gay and fuck around and honestly? fair enough
Mencia. Oh, Mencia. i liked her a lot from the get go and i still think her character is cool as shit, but there were quite some moments when i wouldve loved to smack her across the face. i also cried a lot when it came to Mencia/Rebeka. when Samu said “Fuck, you two are cute”? i felt that. i very much cringed at the chocolate scene, but to each their own i guess.
Ari; about 95% of the season disliked her. i didn’t hate her, but she was like a knockoff version of Lu? listen, i know i’m being biased here and it’s very unfair towards her, but to me, it just felt like she always tried to be the mean girl but never really succeeded. my opinion of her skyrocketed in the last few minutes of the last episode, though. we love some good sibling care in this house. not like it had been like that in the beginning, mind you.
i. fucking. hated. Benjamin. like the whole time. i think there was legit one single moment when i thought like “okay hold on that was the first (and last) good move you made this whole season” and it was when he offered Mencia to listen to her anytime she wanted or needed to. otherwise. fuck him. his attitude, his way of talking, his way of acting, fucking everything. (in the very last scene, when he destroyed the table? like yeah, i get that you’re emotional and angry and shit but my dude, your youngest daughter just told you she basically got r*ped on a daily basis by the guy *you* invited to your house because you only saw his money. can you please show some motherfucking self-control and not scare said daughter to fucking death oh my god i hate this guy so fucking much) also because he kicked out azucena. on that note, ander being protective of his mom? absolutely living for it.
aaand Ander. here we go. oof. i did not like him for a good part of the season. actually, i think it probably started in episode one and ended in the last one, lol. i just felt like there were little things that made sense? i appreciated him telling Omar that he finds this other guy (aka Patrick) hot, but like some time later, they break up in this really horrible and heartbreaking sequence and a minute later, Ander goes whoring around like there’s no tomorrow? like, literally? huh? i found myself really torn between who to dislike more; Ander or Patrick. nice el desorden reference. (both the shot where he masturbated alone in the shower and the book, lmao)
as for Omar; can the writers just leave him the fuck alone please? what did he ever do to yall to ever deserve all this shit he has to go through constantly in this show holy fuck i HATE how he got treated by Ander and Patrick and Benjamin. This boy deserves so much better. he did seem a little out of character sometimes, i gotta say. not sure why tho. most times, he was the sweet, empathetic cinnamon roll we know him as. like idk man he does so much for his friends?? the thing with Philippe and Caye at the bar was adORABLE
which leads us to
Philippe. dude. what. was his character. most of the time, i felt kinda bad for him, like his so called friends literally all just saw the royalty in him (not that he made the impression that he didnt like that in the first few episodes, but yeah it’s a thing so i reckoned that would come up later on). also i was so happy for Cayetana ughguhghguhghh they were really cute together......but then he gotta pull this shit, like what??? in the actual fuck. he’s just like “yeah some girl tried to sue me, saying i r*ped her” and then later he’s like “so yeah i’m actually a r*pist, whoops, sorry, can you stay pretty please?” like ex fucking cuse the shit out of me sir. no. the problem is i *want* to like him because pol granch is a fucking sweetheart and i’m catching myself thinking stuff like hes kind of aware that hes a borderline r*pist and that hes also very aware that it’s not okay? but like? he doesn’t try to change? don’t even get me started on his mother. ugly ass bitch. that’s all i have to say.
so i didnt like Cayetana for a major amount of s3, like at all. but yeah, what can i say. shes just a sweet girl okay and now i have a soft spot for her. much like Omar i feel like, she gets a lot of shit, completely uncalled for and there’s nothing she can do against it she just like stumbles into the pile of crap and then is knee-deep in. i feel very sorry for her man i just wanna hug her.
just for the record, there was not a single second that i thought Amomrdm(shit i forgot his name lmfao) -the bad guy- was just being nice and helpful. tbh he just deserved what he got. whoops, there, i said it.
the build up in the last episode was very nice, i gotta say. it was low key obvious who would be the one to attack Ari, but it’s alright. i did not expect the thing with Guzman tho lol. You go man. (but still, aggression problems.)
side note; dude it really sucks that guzman and samuel were too busy fighting over Ari to actually notice her missing lmao
oh also - Rebeka’s ninja kick on the dock??????? HELLO????
guzman and ander leaving made me so fucking emotional?????? excuse me??? who gave them the right?????
edit; (a day later)
just noticed i completely forgot Samu, lol. hes just so far away from my type and i dont really have an opinion on him like yeah hes kind-hearted and cares for his friends, and thats sweet, but uuuhhhhhh. i was only there for the lil gay moments between him and guzman. there were a lot of them. i was really happy when he and Rebeka made up and talked to each other again, that was kinda wholesome. aside from that tho? idk hes just kinda [shrug-emoji] for me (like he had been from s1 all the way on to be quite honest)
that said, i’m sure theres lots more thoughts in my mind but the heat is making my head hurt lol ok bye
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leossmoonn · 3 years
Note
omg bae ship me w someone!! i rlly hope u know enough about me but just in case u don’t i use she/her/hers pronouns and i’m bi so u can ship me w any gender! also do it for any fandom i wanna see what u come up w LOL LOVE YOU <3
hehe alrighty
male mcu ship - peter parker
i swear i didnt ship u w peter just bc of your pfp pick but when you sent me your info and i read youre allergic to cats i was like “yes this is peter’s gf”. also i see you and peter as very alike ppl so… OKAY anyways so youll def met in school duh. it was the first day of the senior year in physics. you outsmarted him and he was like 🤨🤨 but also 😳😳 but he was confused and flustered. you ended up turning to him and giving him a smile which made his face turn pink. you giggled softly and turned back to pay attention the the class, completely obvious to the fact that peter stared at you the whole period.
after class he went up to you and was like “h-hey, y/n, right? well u-um i noticed that i was wrong in class, and i was just um, wondering if you could explain to me how i was wrong. because i was like, 200% sure i was right haha” and youre like “sure. meet me in the library during lunch” then you leave bc youre cool and peter is left there like 😮.
anyways so he meets you in the library and you basically give him a tutoring session and omg he literally cant stop staring at youu. he loves the way you smell and he thinks you look so pretty in your outfit hes like 😍😍😍. you notice this and smirk and say “you wanna go out w me and betty and ned tonight?” and hes like 😟 “wot” and youre like “it can be a double date. unless youre with someo-” and he’s like “NO NO IM NOT” and youre like “alright. heres my address. be there at 5, no later than that” you scribble your apartment number down and hand it to him before leaving. he picks up the paper and stares at it and just smiles bc tbh hes always thought you were pretty but was always too nervous to talk to you.
anyways so he tells aunt may when he gets home n shes so excited! her baby is going on his first date! she helps him prepare and she wishes him the best as he leaves to go to your apartment. he knocks on the door, holding a rose and waiting anxiously for you to open the door. you do a few moments later, your appearance making his heart explode. youre in this pretty blue dress thats super casual and has white flowers all over it. and hes like 😍😍😍😍 and you giggle and get flustered bc your long time crush is staring at you with his jaw wide. you then say hi, breaking him out of his daze and hes like “h-hi. you look stunning, u-uh i mean, pretty. stunning is too much. o-or maybe it’s not uh—” “thank you pete” you say. he smiles and holds out the rose, to which you awe at. you take him inside for a few moments, ned and betty already there. you grab your purse before you two head to downtown. 
the night is amazing. while ned and betty are cuddling up to each other, you and peter hang back and talk. you two learn a lot about each other and jump from topic to topic seamlessly. you end the night w ice cream and while ned takes betty home, peter takes you home too. you two end up sharing a cute goodbye kiss that leaves you two 😍😍😍 (lmfao this emoji is so famous). and you bid him goodbye and leave him again, flustered. next morning you two see each other in class and peter asks you to be his gf (aww) (you assume betty gave him the advice but actually he did it all on his own. he isnt totally clueless).
you two become gf and bf and are easily the most attractive and smartest couple in school. you two go on lots of dates and often match your outfits hehe. you two are often found in his apartment, cuddling while studying for upcoming tests. he eventually reveals his secret to you and youre a little pissed he didnt tell you before , but overall youre amazed and supportive. you do worry about him bur after missions he always comes back to you and its the best.
also just wanna add you two move in together after graduating and get a cat and you both just die while you cuddle it 🤩🤩
female hp ship - ginny weasley
kk so like you two were bffs before but then you two got drunk and ended up revealing your feelings to each other and shared a very drunk kiss before falling asleep on the couch in the common room 🌝. but the next morning you two are like 😳😳 “uh.. did we?” and you two are smiling like idiots and you kiss again out of excitement. 
you two kinda officiate everything that morning. you two decide to not be public yet bc its new to yall and you two dont want to ruin your friendship but literally a week in you both know youre soulmates and you end up giving your friends hints by beginning to hold hands n all that PDA. theyre very supportive of yall and youre soon the most cherished couple in school, but you two make sure to keep your relationship private.
you two go on lots of dates too. mostly to hogmeade, but in the summer you hang out at her house and end up going into town a lot. your outfits also match. ginny is usually seen wearing the jean and shirt version of y’all’s outfit but sometimes she’ll wear a dress to twin w you hehe.
you two are often seen cuddling, watching movies together and taking naps. you two are always in the kitchen, making a mess and having food fights. ginny also gets you into reading too. shes usually the one reading to you bc her voice is nice and soothing, and you almost always fall asleep to her reading. its so cute, molly ends up taking pictures with a camera arthur got her.
when you two are old enough, you move in together in a cute little apartment near the hospital where you intern at. ginny goes to train for quidditch and you two end up spending a lot of time apart, but you make sure to make the most of the time you have together <3 hehe
hope you liked it :) its really long lol 🌝 also this wasnt proofread i apologize if there are mistakes lol
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clumsyclifford · 3 years
Note
bella I would love a directors cut on literally any of the rilex you’ve written, but specifically it’s always her, and you, and me, or for these days you’ve been stuck in my brain 💙
OHHHHHH those are some CHOICESSSSSS lucy. fuck yeah. let’s get into it. ill link them both here but we’ll take em one at a time
it’s always her, and me, you
these days you’ve been stuck in my brain
here’s a cut for convenience cos i KNOW i’m gonna go long here.
okay! let’s start with the rilisex fic.
it’s always her, and me, and you
so like it says in the ao3 notes, this fic came from realizing just how frequently rian and alex kiss each other like, all the time? just? casually? for funsies? this was another one of those situations like i mentioned where the hook aka first line (“Rian's no expert, but he doesn't think normal friends kiss this much.”) just appeared in my head and i was like heyyy that’s a GOOD first line. i have to build from that line. that’s the hook, that’s the summary, that’s the core. 
something i discovered upon searching through the editing history of the doc: i had originally sort of intended to go a direction with this where in some other circumstance, rian would see alex giving jack a super casual friendly kiss and he’d get all sad/jealous and be like sure why SHOULDNT alex kiss jack after all its just a thing he does with his FRIENDS. but the fic ended up going a different way and honestly? im glad. i like this way better.
the role of singin in the rain in this fic actually has a HILARIOUS backstory because the night i originally wrote that conversation in the tour bus kitchen, i went into the club and said the following
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and then. the next day. rian streamed with ricky, and i asked if he’d ever seen singin in the rain, and he ANSWERED ME and said he hadn’t. so first of all i had already written the scene and i then had to rewrite it to make it so rian wouldn’t have seen it but also!!! i literally asked rian fucking dawson if he’d seen a movie for the sole reason of using that information for fanfiction!!!! and he provided me with the information i needed!!!! whole thing is just fucking hysterical to me. ANYWAY.
ANYWAY, the other reason why sitr has such a big role in the fic is because megs and i watched the movie together while i was in the middle of working on the fic, so it was extremely fresh in my mind. in fact i can probably show you this: i had this comment left for myself when i was kind of trying to figure out if i could make a real metaphor of sorts with the sitr ot3 and the Big Three of this fic. some of this ended up in rian’s wild musings in the hotel scene but i did conclude that it wouldn’t really have worked and that was definitely true but anyway. fuck it, director’s cut, here’s the kind of shit i leave for myself to refer to
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so that’s part of the reason why it became such a puzzle piece of this fic, but real talk, it’s also just because i love singin in the rain it’s one of my favorite movies lmao
briefly gonna also touch on lisa and why she’s in this fic because i realize that rian/alex/lisa is an interesting approach to rilex! first of all, i love lisa. i love alex and lisa. and it occurred to me that there was really no reason to split lisex up just to make rilex happen. plus there’s this tweet that really just pushed me over the edge of being like yeah, rilisex is extremely plausible. so that’s that on that.
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as for the scene in the hotel room while they’re watching sitr, there is a small piece of that scene - from when alex starts kissing rian’s shoulders etc to “it would defy the laws of nature not to” - that i actually wrote before anything else in that scene. that small piece got stretched out and edited quite a bit from how it started but it did function as a sort of foundation around which i built the rest of the scene, because that small section sort of ~came to me~ absolutely out of nowhere, and i really liked the Vibe it had and i wanted to include it. i THINK that was the only piece of this fic that i wrote Out Of Order - for the most part this was written chronologically.
ALSO!!! omg this is exciting, this fic actually has a deleted scene!!!!!! i hate cutting scenes but i also hate having scenes that are less than 1k and this one didn’t really contribute much to the fic. i can probably share it here right? sure why not ! hopefully you can read this. it originally took place after the scene where alex and rian call lisa for the first time. the question of “what gets left into interview videos and what gets cut” is also just interesting to me as a (fic) concept in general so...eyes emoji, but here’s my mini-exploration that i cut from the original fic. enjoy lol it’s silly <3
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oh! also one more thing!! the very final scene was included for two reasons. the first reason being that when i write getting-together fics, i really prefer to add on a scene After they Get Together because i love to write domestic established relationship stuff and i think that’s a satisfying reward for a reader who’s just slogged through all the mutual pining and bullshit to get the characters together. but the OTHER reason is that i got an anon (here it is!) and i read that ask and was immediately like well shit. now i have to fucking include this. for the anon and for myself. so you can thank that anon for that last scene. (also i wanted to include merrikat especially since i had to cut their little moment in the interview scene above.)
so....................whew. i think i’ve bled that fic dry. holy shit that’s a lot of Stuff. OKAY! let’s move on.
~
these days you’ve been stuck in my brain
so!!! THIS fic was the breakthrough after (what felt like) a long bout of writer’s block. long for me was maybe two weeks, but i am the kind of person who is always writing, and two weeks was a long time to go with little to no inspiration/motivation to write anything. i had also been in a weird narrative headspace because i’d been binge-watching disney shows (jessie > austin and ally > girl meets world) and i don’t know how well i can explain this but the way those shows are written is a lot snappier and cares way less for realistic and consistent character development or plots or relationships, and so i was stuck between caring a lot about including those things in my fics but also being unable to conceptualize them in writing because my brain was in Disney Writing Mode. does that make sense? this is rhetorical so let’s go with yes. so anyway. i was in a slump
actually what i ended up doing was basically googling something like “au prompts tumblr” or something and just scrolling through posts. i saw something about soulmate telepathy and i actually tried to write something totally different before i wrote this one, but the first attempt was a different concept and then the direction i took it was like......it wasn’t quite right and i realized that i was kind of writing dark disney style? there is really no way for me to explain what i mean by that because it seems really obvious to me but that’s just because i’m inside my own head so just take my word. 
anyway. attempt #1 of soulmate telepathy rilex went poorly, and this fic was attempt #2. i kinda took the soulmate telepathy thing and changed it as i saw fit and i also went back to skim helen’s telepathy fic because obviously she’s the pro and then i tried not to steal her ideas. and as i was writing it i kinda realized i was doing the whole quirky funny best friend character with jack and also doing the whole “somehow this not-very-dramatic situation with teenagers is treated as The Most Dramatic Thing Ever and that’s totally normal and nobody finds it strange” disney trope with rian and alex being soulmates and i was like (deep sigh) i have to accept that no matter how much i try to fight this, this fic is going to be tainted with disney. and that’s life
on top of that i will add that the real-life rilex were extremely inspiring during the two-day period during which i wrote this fic, because that was when the once in a lifetime video came out and in the brief pre-video livestream rilex were Beyond Married and that definitely helped in the writing of fic rilex!
hmmmm what can i tell you about this fic itself.................honestly, i don’t think there’s much to tell! rian is a band kid because in real life rian was a band kid and he’s staff manager at rita’s just like he was in real life. there is truthfully not a lot to unpack here that i can think of!
oh here’s something i guess: rian and alex go on a date in this fic! that is because watching So Much Disney made me realize that i often forget the fact that people just. go on dates. sometimes. look i clearly do not have an active romantic life but i also really liked the idea of alex and rian going on a date despite not knowing if they’d be soulmates or not and liking each other organically just by getting to know each other, rather than being victim to the whole soulmate thing. like i wanted them to build a connection so that they would want to be soulmates. and then the audience would want that for them too. stakes!! very important.
i can tell you i had a mild crisis over the title of the fic because i am not a fan of the word brain and i didnt wanna use that sticky lyric for the title when it had a word i hated but it was objectively a much better title option than the other one i had, which was “sticky just like the song in my head” but i obviously decided on the former and it has not upset me nearly as much as i expected it to so that was the right decision imo
so! i think that’s all on that! sorry (?) that it got so long although then again i don’t know what’s to be expected in a director’s cut for two long fics but thank you for asking me about these, i love them both so very much rilex is so supremely underrated but so very important
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shadedrose01 · 4 years
Text
Truth or Dare (Yes, I Double Dare You)
Ships: Parkner (Harley Keener/Peter Parker), mentioned Thompsborn (Harry Osborn/Flash Thompson)
Summary: Peter play Truth or Dare with his friends.
Tags: Febufluff, Day 8, I dare you to kiss me, Truth or Dare, Party Games, Birthday Party, They play truth or dare y'all, Peter has a crush on Harley, Harley likes him back, Thompsborn is in this too, Bisexual Peter Parker, Gay Harley Keener, Dare, Calling your crush, admitting feelings, Mutual Pining, First Kiss, Kissing, Cute, Fluff, a lot of swearing, I dont know why i made them swear so much, im sorry lol, Bad French, Poor translated french, I Tried
Day eight of Febufluff: "I dare you to... kiss me"!
--
"Hmm, I dare you to speak in a French accent for the next three rounds." Flash grins over his cup, swirling the drink in front of his mouth before taking a sip, watching the smile drop off of his boyfriend's face, an incredulous expression replacing it.
"Seriously?!?"
"Yes, seriously! And that wasn't in an accent!"
"Oui, oui, baguette." Harry deadpans, looking so entirely done with Flash's bullshit, the entire room erupting into laughter as said boy sits up, shoving his boyfriend's shoulder hard.
"No halfassed bullshit, dickwad. The real deal."
"Fine, you want the real deal?" Harry sits up straight, and Peter starts giggling like a mad man from the other side of the room, leaning against the wall to watch the scene unfold, knowing exactly what is about to happen. Harry clears his throat, holds a dramatic pause for a few seconds, before- "Tu veux un accent francaise, tu vas recevoir un accent francaise."
"Oh my god, I forgot he spoke French!" Flash moans, slowly slipping down the wall in shame.
"Oh la la, ma chérie, qu'est ce que tu as fais, eh?" Harry grins, smug, cheeky, knowing he's won this hand as his boyfriend sinks even lower, his head almost level with the ground, his face red.
"And why is it so hot?!?"
"Okay, okay, enough." Ned laughs, sitting chris cross apple sauce beside Peter, the party hat sat on the top of his head beginning to sag.
It was Ned's 17th birthday, and instead of throwing a big party full of alcohol and loud music like most people in their classes did, he decided to have a smaller party, a sleepover full of board games, video games and now party games, with his closest friends, with their friend group. So here they all were, packing into Ned's smaller sized room, Flash and Harry practically conjoined at the hip sitting against the wall, Peter and Ned sitting on top of his bed on the other side of the room, and MJ and Harley leaning against said bed, sat on the floor, playing what would hopefully be a quick game of Truth or Dare. Hopefully.
Peter had never liked this game. There was always too much risk for him in this game, of being asked to reveal one of his many secrets, or of being asked to embarrass himself for laughs. He gets the appeal of it, the adrenaline rush, the amusement of watching your friends do something stupid, it's a fun game to watch, but that doesn't mean he likes playing it. He hadnt even called on yet though, and he was hoping to keep it that way.
He shouldn't have jinxed it.
As if his thoughts manifested into reality, Harry turns to stare at him with a unknown, horrifying glint in his eyes. Oh no, this is definitely not going to end well. "Action ou Vérité?"
Peter sighs, looking up to the ceiling as he mumbles "Dare.", assuming that's what Harry asked. If he's going to go down, he may as well go down in style.
Harry's grin widens, and Peter is already regretting his decision. "Je te défie de telephoner ton béguin."
Peter blinks at him in confusion, before MJ translates, "He's daring you to call your crush."
"What?!?" Peter sputters, Harry cackling at  his flushing face while Harley speaks up for the first time in a while, his ('beautiful, gorgeous, fuck-') face turned towards MJ, scrunched up in thought.
"You know French? Since when?"
MJ just shrugs, face impartial, the only sign of her shyness being her pushing a stray hair behind her ear. "Since I got bored one day and learned it."
Harley just nods, like that makes sense, all while Peter is internal freaking the fuck out. Normally, this type of thing wouldn't be an issue. Sure, your friends will find out who your crush is, and tease you about it, and it'll be embarassing and whatever, but that's not the problem. Oh no no no no no, that would be too easy for Peter Parker. No, the problem with this question for Peter is that his crush is in the damn room, sitting directly in front of him leaning against the bed, an easy smile tilting up his thin pink lips, showing off his adorable dimples as he scans the room again with those big, stunning ocean blue eyes, hair coiffed back just right, messy, but just neat enough to be perfect, one stray blond curl falling in front of his eyes and fuck, fuck, frick fuck.
What is he going to do?!? He can't exactly call Harley when he's right in front of him, but he can't exactly say that he won't do it either, he wont be that guy. And now everybody is staring at it, expectant, waiting, shit, shit, shit-
Ned's eyes are the only ones that are sympathetic, because he knows, he knows who Peter likes and why this is such a big deal. Harley is one of Peter's best friends, they've been friends for years, and Peter is closer to Harley than he is to anybody else, he cant just throw it all away because of a game, can he? Harley definitely doesnt like him back, so if he does call him, it'll only end badly, but theres this tiny, tiny, traitorous part of him that wants to fo it, wants to tell him, if only to get it out in the open. But he cant ruin their friendship like that, he cant, but- but- oh god, oh no-
"Come on, Parker, we don't have all day." Flash complains innocently, not knowing of Peter's internal dilemma as he throws a stray piece of popcorn at him, Peter catching it subconsciously and throwing it into his mouth, just to try and get a few more seconds of peace before all hell breaks loose, before he destroys his closest friendship with his stupid ass feelings, goddamn it-
"Yeah, Pete, come on, dont keep us on the end of our seats." Harley teases, placing his head onto the blankets and looking back at him upside down, his hair surrounding his head like a halo, making him look even more angelic that he normally does, and god, why him, why? "Who's caught your eye, hm?"
Peter takes a deep, long, shaky breath, trying to prepare himself for the worst (and failing), taking his phone out of his pocket and scrolling down to Harleys contract, the black letters and two heart emojis on either side staring back at him mockingly. He hovers his thumb over the call button, noting how much its trembling, before he gulps and presses it, placing the phone to his ear, squeezing his eyes shut like a coward, unable to watch, knowing that Harleys expression was going shift, was going to turn from soft and warm, friendly, to hard and angry, to hatred and disgust and-
ACDC blares out into the room, the noise very obviously Harley's ringtone, and Peter grits his teeth, biting his tongue hard, his heart hammering in his chest.
"Wha-" Harley sounds so confused, so so confused, and Peter's squeezes his eyes shut tighter, holding back the burning tears that are threatening to spill. "Peter, why are you- wait..." He stops, pauses, and Peter digs his nails into his palm, squeezing his phone until he hears it start to crack. "...really?"
His voice is shaky, and god, Peter made him upset, he is probably so hurt, so confused, so disgusted, god stupid, you're so stupid, why would you do that, why didnt you just not do it, why why why-
He nods once, slowly, swallowing down a sob before whispering out "I'm sorry," into the now eerily silent room, his friends seemingly shocked into silence. He doesnt even want to know what they're thinking, what expressions are on their faces-
Theres another pause, another moment before he hears somebody shifting, Harley standing up, he's leaving, he's leaving- Good job, Parker, now you're forcing him to leave, you made him feel so uncomfortable that he's leaving, good fricken job, god, what is wrong with you-
A hand rubs his cheek gently, so so gently, spurring him out of his head as it brushes away a tear that had broken free, before another hand joins it on his other cheek, cradling his face. Peter blinks opens his eyes, shocked to see that its Harleys hands on his face, and that its Harley sat right in front of his face, with a wide smile and glowing eyes, face bright. "You mean it? You really mean it?"
Peter just nods again, so, so confused but also filling with a spark of hope, of joy as Harley's smile grows even more, filling his face before he launches into Peter's arms, hugging him tightly. "Oh thank god," he breathes into Peter's shoulder, and Peter is so lost, what is happening- "I thought you  were gonna call someone else, and I was gonna have to act all happy and like it didn't bother me when it totally would have and-"
"Wait, wait," Peter finally puts together the pieces, and pulls away to stare at Harley with wide eyes, the beginning of a smile twitching at his lips. "You like me back?"
"Yeah?" Harley cheeks grow a rosey hue, and he looks away bashfully. "I thought it was obvious."
Peter shakes his head wildly, eyes still wide, this cant be happening, he likes me back, he likes me- "No, no it wasn't, it really really wasn't-"
"So, what I'm hearing," MJ cuts in, tone blunt as always, but with hints of warm amusement softening the usual edge, "is that you two are oblivious idiots."
They both laugh breathless, staring into each others eyes. "Apparently." Harley murmurs, his blue eyes swirling and flickering up and down, looking down at his lips before looking back up again.
Peter gets an idea, a cheesy, cheesy idea, and grins. "Hey, it's my turn now, right?" He asks to the group, never taking his eyes off of Harley.
"Yeeup!" Ned responds enthusiastically, seemingly thrilled to see his two best friends realizing their feelings for one another.
"Well," he leans forward a bit more, watching as Harleys pupil's grow bigger. "Truth or dare, Harls."
"Dare." He responds easily, quickly, seemingly getting more and more antsy by the second. Peter can't blame him, he feels the same way.
"I dare you to kiss me." Peter doesnt even finish his sentence before Harley's lips are pressed to his, his hands moving upwards and running through his hair, fingers grabbing lightly onto the strands as Peter grabs his hips lightly, pulling him closer, both of the boys grinning into the kiss. Peter can hear MJ gagging in the background, Harry exclaiming "gross!" like he doesnt kiss Flash every two seconds, and Ned squealing like a fangirl, but he ignores it all, just focusing on Harley, focusing on this moment, his heart swelling in his chest.
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a-libra-writes · 4 years
Note
Could you do ⛅ 💎 💥 💤 and 🌸 with Aberama Gold? You can delete this if you want to cause idk if I sent this beyond a deadline. And if you do it you can choose one of the emoji, I liked them all lol so I'm fine with whichever one you want. Thank you so much, I love how you write for Aberama so it would mean a lot if you do write the headcanon. Not that I'm trying to guilt trip you into doing it, not my intention at all. I just really live your writing and wouldn't be hurt if you didnt write it.
aaghh sorry i took so long with this!! stupid work grumble grumble save me. I hope u didnt think I deleted it haha, I like Aberama a heckin lot. Glad you like how I write him! OK LETS GO LONG BOI
⛅ Sunset HC
He loves watching the sunset. Once you got to know him, this didn’t seem so strange. As the afternoon began to end, you’d notice him glance toward the sky no matter where you two were, and he’d be a little more distracted if it was an especially clear, beautiful day.
Getting such pretty sunsets wasn’t too common in London,  or any city, which is why he preferred being out in the country. 
Aberama used to think by himself during these times, but he began to like it when you joined him. He’d have you sit on his lap and chat with him - and if that was too embarrassing - at least sit beside him. During the colder months he’d wrap his jacket around you (and probably put the hat on you too, because you’re too cute).
When he’s feeling particularly sentimental, he’ll tell you all about how beautiful you look with the golden and red colors shining on your eyes and skin. He’ll sweet talk you until the moon comes up.
His favorite sunsets are the fiery orange and red ones that are scattered with clouds. To him, they look like a glimpse of heaven... he often thinks these are the only looks he’ll get of that place.
💎 Marriage HC
It was obvious when he was smitten with you, and more obvious that he wanted something more long-term. He’s actually quite a romantic man, in spite of his occupation, and he wanted to make a life with you. He thought you were just perfect.
And yes, he was a bit into the age gap.
Your wedding was modest, but surrounded with family and the reception is lively. Plenty of dancing, drinking, music and laughter, and his family put together a new wagon that was decorated in flowers and vines, just for you. Aberama couldn’t keep you out of his lap or his arms the whole time. 
Depending on your preferences, you either had a small cottage in a village or you stayed with his family in the wagons. Due to his jobs, Aberama would disappear for days at a time, sometimes a week or more. He’d come home, tired and a mess - sometimes injured - but he always gave you a kiss and hug before washing up. He preferred to be clean and in a change of clothes before holding you again.
He doesn’t discuss his jobs with you, period. He doesn’t want you getting tangled up in them, and he’s expressly forbid his men and Bonnie from discussing it with you. Even if it frustrates and worries you, he doesn’t budge on this decision.
If you didn’t know Romani, he’d gradually teach you. Since he wasn’t around all the time, Bonnie and his daughters would help.
He’s very delighted that you get along with his children, especially the younger girls, who don’t remember much of their mother. As much as he’d love children with you, he’d understand if his were more than enough. 
Bonnie sees you as more of an older sister figure than a mother - since he still remembers his mom - but you two still get along great. You’re usually patching him up after a boxing match or cooking him filling food. He’s glad you made his dad happy, but could you two please stop being so sappy in front of him and his friends? Thanks.
Once Tommy meets you and realizes how much Aberama dotes on you, he makes a point to invite you to gatherings together. He hopes you’ll calm the man down or act as a pacifying presence. It ... sort of works. While he is in a better mood with you on his arm, he’s also far more likely to bash the teeth out of any man who disrespects you.
He’ll bash the teeth out of his own men if they dare the same thing, and that’s if they’re lucky. Bonnie doesn’t tell you, but he’s seen his father send more than one man to a ditch for insulting you and your family (especially if you were non-Romani).
No matter what, he’d be protective of you, but it would happen behind the scenes. He wouldn’t want you to feel like he was being possessive or suffocating, so he’ll have a guard or two quietly watch your home when he’ s away, and he’ll deal with the before mentioned troublesome men on his own.
This has led to situations where you go to him in a panic, saying a strange man has been following you and standing around the house. He grabs his gun and investigates and ... it’s one of his idiots. “Be more careful, would you? Just go the fuck home, I’m here anyway.” 
When he comes back he acts like he chased off some scary robber and you play along and give him plenty of kisses.
Basically, you two have a very loving, sappy marriage that makes people forget he’s one of the deadliest guns-for-hire in England. 
💤 Napping HC
Aberama hardly ever naps, but he can fall asleep anywhere. You have no idea how he does it. He can do sitting in a horse, leaning against a wall or standing up. 
His “technical” naps are when he gets back from a job in the middle of the afternoon. He’d been up for days at that point, and he collapses on the couch and tells you he’s just going to rest his eyes for a few moments. You eventually gently wake him.
Still, he much prefers to fall asleep next to you. After staying up for an ungodly amount of time, he’ll let you drag him to bed, only if you promise to lie down by his side. 
When he sleeps, he reminds you of a cat with how he tucks his head down and curls into himself. Often his face twitches with expressions, but only for a moment.
💥First Fight / Making up HC
Your first fight is also what your subsequent fights and squabbles have been about: The danger of his jobs, and what little you know about them. Aberama wouldn’t give in, curtly telling you there was zero reason for you to be involved.
You knew about these “jobs” while he courted you, and you didn’t delude yourself into thinking he’d stop after you married. But this time he came home with two bullet wounds, and he was gone for two weeks. Couldn’t he at least have sent a man to tell you he was alright? Or where he was? That he was hurt? At least that?
Aberama just dismissed you, which he so rarely did, as he was just as tired and frustrated... Not to mention the wounds. He hoped in the morning, you’d understand, and both your moods would be better.
It wasn’t. You were still pissed, so he left, insisting he’d be back.
You fumed, but began to worry. What if you were too harsh, especially since he was in such bad shape? Maybe he didn’t want to worry you, or maybe someone was on his trail and he didn’t want anything coming back to you. He always kept you and his daughters out of his messes. Maybe ...
Your mind began to race, and you were feeling frustrated and emotional all over again. You decided to go look for him, it wouldn’t be hard. Right as you opened the door, Aberama was walking up to the doorstep. He had bought your favorite flowers and he quickly pulled you into an embrace. 
While he still thought he was doing what was best for your safety, he understood your worry and recognized he was dismissing your concerns. He said all this, giving you plenty of kisses and apologies.
He wanted to make love to you to show you how truly sorry he was but those bullet wounds were kind of, you know, painful as all hell. Aberama was still gonna go for it but you insisted “cuddles until that’s healed”.
🌸Kissing HC
There’s no such thing as chaste kisses or pecks unless he’s truly in a hurry. He feels so much for you that those just seem inadequate displays of affection.
Whenever he kisses you, he wants to properly show his love, although it never does seem like enough. He’ll hold the small of your back and bring you closer, because you always have to be close when he does this. If there’s not many people around, or better - none - he’ll start at your neck and work his way to your lips.
The kisses on your lips are always deep, and you feel yourself pressing back against him. If he has to say goodbye, he’ll make sure it’s longer, and he’ll promptly kiss your cheek and promise to be back soon.
Even when you’re just parting for a few hours while he goes to the boxing ring or you leave to town, he’ll pull you into his embrace and give you a firm kiss. “Behave yourself, dear.”  “Aberama, I always tell you that.”
It’s kind of nauseating to anyone who watches, Bonnie has long learned to just walk away 
To be sure, it’s very jarring for some of his men to see their terrifying boss turn to his wife, give her a sweet kiss, then turn to them with a sharp gleam in his eye, like he’s daring them to say something.
At home, he often gives you stray kisses on your neck, your cheek, your hand, whatever suits his whims at the time. In bed, even if you aren’t making love, he wants to give you several kisses goodnight. When he walks into the house and you’re already asleep, he’ll give gentle kisses that won’t make you stir. He hopes you can feel them in your dreams.
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monghoneys-blog · 5 years
Text
— seunghun as your boyfriend
a/n: im thirsty so im writing this thing to please my imagination and everyone out there who loves this boy. pls be aware that english isnt my first language so i could make some mistakes (if you see them pls tell me!) ((this might be not that well orginized cause this is how my brain works))
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ok let me say this first
hES SHY HES INTROVERTED YALL
like damn it really will take some time to know each other
and it’ll we be a little bit awkward
but thanks god seunghun is the best in getting closer with people
and when things are settle down you’ll be more comfortable w/ each other
he cannot stop smiling looking at you
hes whipped. 
gon: damn ma friend you are whipped for them even i can notice this
seunghun: what are u talking about? (´・ᴗ・ ` ) 
anyways seunghun thought that hes like that cause he likes you as a very good friend !!
but well
he’ll be pretty fast at noticing his feelings yeah
cause hes honest with himself
and be like okay i like them so whats next
should i confess them right away or test the water first
this is how he started to flirt a little bit more
and you on the other hand started noticing smth weird
like unexpected present from him???
those earrings that you wanted from your first shopping together but couldnt buy it
more emoji hearts in his texts 
you just felt that his aura, his behaviour changed when he was around you
and you’re confused cause you liked him too but ofc he didnt know that
you confessed about that to yonghee lol
no one didnt know besides him
and let me tell you he did a very good job to keep your secret !!
cause he was tired of seeing seunghun clowning himself and how you cant notice such obvious things
anYWAYS somehow you two made it ╰( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )つ──☆*:・゚
(thanks god said yonghee)
so we’re back to shy seunghun cAUSE
relationships = gettING TO KNOW ABOUT EACH OTHERS SOME NEW DEEP ROMANTIC SHIT
like you know
how to hold your hand
how to make you feel comfortable in romantic way
what u like and what not
how to kiss you after all
hes a man of manners and dont want to feel you uncomfortable
if you dont like smth he’ll be like
uhh huh note taken ( ◡‿◡ )
he expects the same thing from you
so pls dont cook soft veggies
i really see him being a very chill bf???
he’ll be the first to approach you after some fight to make things clear so there’s no understatements left
he hates this tension and wants to know in the calm atmosphere what upsets you and how you two can fix it
hes not that loud everyone
when hes around you he feels very comfortable so he can turn off this always hype mode
most of your dates are going out to some hot cafes in seoul
or exhibitions 
or maybe shopping sometimes
and after every shopping you’re just make home fashion show
and take photos of each others
when seunghun is changing his outfit 
you’ll send some ugly photos of him to cix gc (°◡°♡)
talking about home dates
its basically you lying down on bed or couch listening to his playlists
OR
MARVEL MOVIESSSSS YAS
seunghun will be excited like a child
if you have different taste or opinion 
he’ll be glad to know and to hear !!
sometimes you’ll be have some deep talks about your worries, experiences that you two had
it wouldnt be smth heavy or sad 
he’ll be trying his best to make these kind of talks light
maybe will make some playlist for background
not sad songs just some chill instrumentals or indie
seunghun pretty much likes affection
to give and recieve
if you arent comfortable with it he’ll ask what he can do and what not
if you feel shy about public affection he’ll just only hold your hand lol
if you into it then well
HUGS AND KISSES
but its not like from the first date he’ll sucking your face
no
it’ll take some time to adjust 
and when you and he will be comfortable with each other in romantic way
damn
he would like to give you forehead kisses when he leaves
or kiss your hand when he just feels whipped for u
when he’s tired he loves to kiss your shoulder
and receive some kisses on the forehead
so when you’ll reach this level of relationships when you are ready to introduce themselves to each others families
you know that seunghun has a brother
the one who makes beats right
you’ll be like mAN YOUR SOUNDCLOUD IS LIT (btw really go check his sc)
and seunghun entering the room: what about me? (。•́︿•̀。)
you: but.. you dont make any beats…
seunghun: UTェTU
so yeah pls praise his hard work too but not much cause he can sense that you overdoing it 
you know he really all about healthy relationships and manners 
if he ever will be jealous he will tell you right away what bothers him
not like hey im jealous so pls stop doing (insert smth)
but more like in a soft way
when you’re upset he will ask whats wrong
and if you need time alone he’ll fully understand that and come back a little bit later
if you heed his advice/hug/kiss he’ll do it
he’ll adore you and respect you in every way so pls do the same thing to him (´,,•ω•,,)
its really messy but well i have many headcanons so maybe i’ll write pt2 and for others too
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freshsliceoflemon · 4 years
Text
1 | Projects and Objects
James Madison recently gotten a number from one of his classmates, since the two have a project due next week. Turns out, the number is incorrect which leads him into talking to a total stranger, and then into an absolute disaster.
____
This is a college + modern + text/chat AU. It's a slow burn fanfiction, too, but not including Burr and Lee's relationship along with Hercules and Lafayette's. Madison/Jefferson/Hamilton ship. Warning: Cursing. _______________________
***-***-**** (3:55) P.M): Hello, Molly, this is James Madison. You gave me your number in class in regards to the group project we were recently assigned to. Since it is our duty to work together as partners, I hope we can come to an agreement where we have little to no social interaction at all.
??? (4:01 P.M): wot
???: Oh yeh
???: Think you have the wrong number, my dude
???: Yeah*
***-***-****: Pardon?
***-***-***: I have checked the number three times already.
???: Lmao molly gave you a fake number
???: she isn’t interested in u
***-***-****: Why should she be, anyway? I am not interesting in the slightest. We’re just partners for a project that we were assigned. Don’t assume.
***-***-****: Please disregard my rude interruption from whatever you were doing, I shall proceed to erase your number from my contacts and we will carry on like this never happened.
???: What
???: Noo dude wiat
???: James
???: jAmes
???: JAMES ANSWER ME THEERE’s A FIRE
***-***-****: If there is a fire, you should have called the fire department.
???: I just wanted to text u, sheesh >:^
***-***-**** (4:10): What is that.
??? : What is what ???: The emoji thingie??
???: Smh
???: I want to be your friend!! can we be friends????
***-***-****: Why? There is no reason for us to be, I just managed to get the wrong number.
???: I’m thomas!! Thomas Jefferson!!!
???: C’mon, let’s be friends! You seem like a cool guy
???: And a nerd, and nerds are my type ;))
***-***-****: What.
***-***-****: Whatever. I have no interest in pursuing a relationship with you, Jefferson. We don’t know each other at all, and I do not have time for friends. This project is worth half of my semester grade, and I will not be failing because of this foolery.
???: Smhhh
???: Seriously?? no time for friends
???: That’s really sad, my dude
???: well, guess what
***-***-****: What, pray tell?
???: Your my best friend now >:DD
***-***-***: You’re*.
***-***-****: And no, how does one simple interaction make you my “best friend”?
???: You’re my best friend now, shut up
***-***-****: Are you serious?
???: I’ll prove it to you then!!! watch!
***-***-****: What.
______
       Macaroni Fxcker added ***-***-**** to Anatomical Lasers
Macaroni Fxcker (4:11 PM): Guys!!! tell james that I’m his best friend and that he can never deny it!!
A.Hammy: what
A.Hammy: dude who did you add
Macaroni Fxcker: My bestest best friend james
smile the fk more: I thought I was your best friend, Thomas
Macaroni Fxcker: Youre my second best friend don’t worry
A.Hammy: who did you add jefferson
Macaroni Fxcker: James!! say hii!
Baguetteroni: Hi James
***-***-****: Jefferson, why did you add me to this?
Baguetteroni: Wow
Macaroni Fxcker: I wanted to prove to you that im your best friend >:|!!
A.Hammy: smh..
A.Hammy: did you kidnap someone? again?
Macaroni Fxcker : Uh, no
smile the fk more: Thomas, are you lying
Macaroni Fxcker: I’m not!!
Macaroni Fxcker: damn now i have to convince yall that im not lying
***-***-****: What.
***-***-****: You kidnapped someone before?
A.Hammy: ugh we talked about this before jefferson
A.Hammy: so, “james”, what’d you do to get kidnapped by thomas jefferson???
***-***-****: I wasn’t kidnapped.
Macaoni Fxcker: Yeh!!! he said that he didnt have time for friends soo
       Seabunny is now online.
Seabunny: Whaat? But everyone needs friends :^
Leelee: omg stop fucking spamming my notifications guys
smile the fk more: Charles, mute the chat if you dislike the notifications
Leelee: shut up
smile the fk more: Yeah, I’ll shut up alright Leelee: oh no.
       smile the fk more is now offline.
Leelee: oh n o
Seabunny: So James! What’s your zodiac sign?? favourite animal???
Baguetteroni: Oooooo whats ur favourite color??????
***-***-****: what have you done jefferson
Macaroni Fxcker: I added you to my group chat duh
Macaroni Fxcker: I thought you were smart or somethin
       ***-***-**** has left Anatomical Lasers
       Macaroni Fxcker added ***-***-**** to Anatomical Lasers
A.Hammy: bruh
Seabunny: ó .ò
Seabunny : What about favourte herbal tea?????
Leelee: wooow.
       ***-***-**** has left Anatomical Lasers
Macaroni Fxcker: Omg stop
       Macaroni Fxcker added ***-***-**** to Anatomical Lasers
       ***-***-**** has left Anatomical Lasers Macaoni Fxcker: Bitch Seabunny: Oop-
       Macaroni Fxcker added ***-***-**** to Anatomical Lasers Macaroni Fxcker: You should change your nickname Macaroni Fxcker: Numbers are boring, james >:|
***-***-****: Numbers are not boring and never will be. Just let me leave.
       ***-***-**** has left Anatomical Lasers
A.Hammy : Stp A.Hammy : fuck i meant stop* A.Hammy: it’s getting annoying
Leelee: lmao fucker Herc’s a femboy: Woah we have a new person 😳😳😳        Macaroni Fxcker added ***-***-**** to Anatomical Lasers Macaroni Fxcker: Look, james Macaroni Fxcker: I won’t stop until you stay Seabunny: Yeah!! I tried leaving a bunch of times before but I was never able to leave :>!! ***-***-****: Whatever, I give up. I have things to tend to, anyway. Baguetteroni: Like what        ***-***-**** is now offline. A.Hammy: damn jefferson A.Hammy: you made him mad lmaoo Macaroni Fxcker: I didn’t make him mad >:((((( ______        Macaroni Fxcker is now online. Macaroni Fxcker (5:43 PM): Jamesss are you alive?? Macaroni Fxcker (5:49 PM): Hellloooo??        A.Hammy is now online. A.Hammy: smh A.Hammy: cant you just dm him or some shit Macaroni Fxcker: I feel lonely right now so no >:(( A.Hammy: you’re overdramatic Macaroni Fxcker: You’re a cold blooded tiger shark, idiot A.Hammy: you frivolous wanna-be movie trope Macaroni Fxcker: Bruh you’re just a fuckinsnasdasdkasdjjjdjksdj,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, A.Hammy: what. A.Hammy: answer me A.Hammy: what the hell were you about to say A.Hammy: bitch Macaroni Fxcker: Whoopsie doodlie i dropped my computer on my face teehee o3o A.Hammy: how the hell do you do that? A.Hammy: actually don’t respond A.Hammy: it’s obvious that you of all people would do that Macaroni Fxcker: Ouch, hamilton,, you wound me A.Hammy: i sure hope i do.        Herc’s a femboy is now online. Herc’s a femboy: Kinky ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Macaroni Fxcker: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) A.Hammy: shut the up Macaroni Fxcker: Excuse me?!?!!?1? A.Hammy: you’re excused Macaroni Fxcker: Humph >:| Herc’s a femboy: Lol gotta go Herc’s a femboy: I still need to finish sewing the scarf Macaroni Fxcker: Byeee A.Hammy: bye A.Hammy: have fun
       Herc’s a femboy is now offline.
       ***-***-**** is now online.
Macaroni Fxcker: Omg james it’s been so looong how are youu? ***-***-****: It’s been at least an hour since we last spoke, Jefferson. Macaroni Fxcker: Ugh only seeing numbers as your name is boooring ***-***-****: Numbers are not boring. A.Hammy: they’re not as boring as your mom tho Macaroni Fxcker: aLex we don’t know anything about james mom don’t say that DD:< A.Hammy: chill A.Hammy: whyre you so mad lmfaoo Macaroni Fxcker: >.> Macaroni Fxcker: James james james james change your nammmeee already ***-***-****: Why, exactly? Macaroni Fxcker: Changing your nickname thingie makes it less likely for you to leave!! Macaroni Fxcker: And i wanna know what creative things you can come up with!        A.Hammy has changed ***-***-****’s nickname to loser Macaroni Fxcker: Wtf hamilton A.Hammy: hahh loser loser: Sigh. loser: If you insist on me changing my nickname, then;        loser changed their name to Pluto A.Hammy: wow so amazing A.Hammy: i bet flat earthers love you
Pluto: What a shame, seeing as how you haven’t confessed to me yet. A.Hammy: what the shit no A.Hammy: smh i don’t support flat earthers Macaroni Fxcker: Woah. Pluto: “Woah”? Macaroni Fxcker: How small are you?? A.Hammy: i swear if you’re taller than me i’m going to kick you into next wednesday Macaroni Fxcker: I meant height btw Pluto: I’m 5’4. Why is this information necessary? Macaroni Fxcker: omg A.Hammy: i Macaroni Fxcker: omg omg omg you finally found someone shorter than you hammy A.Hammy: don’t fucking call me hammy Macaroni Fxcker: Hey, pluto Pluto: Yes? Macaroni Fxcker: Welcome. you have officially joined this group chat! we should celebrate Pluto: Thank you, I suppose. A.Hammy: yeah, welcome A.Hammy: i sure hope you enjoy your stay A.Hammy: because you aren’t getting out of here alive Pluto: I’ll keep that in mind. Thank you.
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ame77lala · 4 years
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as you all know that live express 2019 BD/DVD is going to be released in march 25 2020
Nana had already finished recording for the end roll for live express nana as a deliveryman and nanette-san as the special guest (i assume she meant the mascot)
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(from the title and refer to photo) keitan: is this mine? O_O!! from sayuri, nana best friend, she gave a charm for keitan (fans found out that this from ehime, so suspect sayuri went holiday trip at ehime?...though theres nothing much..? gomen nana-chan XP ) anyway also she hopes keitan will live longer.... (T_T though she saying in a happy way...but is like in the same time is a sad message, FYI keitan is taken in since 2003, so is like 16+) 
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nana getting old that she nowadays forgot to take the photos for rehearsal =v=;;; so yea if you didnt know, the lyrical nanoha live rehearsal already started at the beginning for 2nd week, so meaning right after coming back from japanese new year holiday (which last from 1st to 3rd + weekends) they already started doing the rehearsal after finish rehearsal and came back home she makes this dish keema curry
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finally began shoot for the calendar for LIVE RUNNER 2020 but this time this calendar will start from april instead of january due to the live start on march, it will be waste that the fan only buy it for 3/4 of the year ^^;; hence start from april (and most stuff also began new beginning in spring, like new school year in japan) this time her photo taken at the house studio at the seaside, both in and outside...which may require nana to be in spartan mode ^^;; (runner you know lol) according to nana, she said the photos are very active and very nice and do look forward to it XD 
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this time she remembers to take a photo of her rehearsal XP this time is her own solo songs, the previous rehearsal focuses on group singing, while this is her own solo songs according to nana, she practices the songs that she havent sang it on stage for a very long time, and also song she havent sang it ever since she recorded it (if you dont know please go search the Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha Character Song Complete BOX, either buy or illegal download it XP) 
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back to dubai ^^;;; nana successfully bargain this perfume for the price 1 for 2 of these ^^;;; the other 1 she passes to her mama XD nana is attracted to the scent that is smell like the sea (so those know perfume, should be obvious is referring to the aqua smell) and also fresh smell (side note why i m having sweating emoji due i hear her dubai backstory on smile gang and M no sekai, though she already said on the blog but on radio theres more, she been scam by a taxi with no meter ^^;;;  so what happens the taxi took the longer route so to able to take more money from nana, but nana kept reject the taxi driver by saying [in english] “NO, nononono nuuuooo money, very expansive” and somehow call in the staff from hotel for help ^^;;; yes nana is indeed smart but funny at the same time how she reacts in this, i wonder how she did the bargain for this perfume XP, in your own delusion world XP)
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....yes i know is number 7, number 7th studio but then...this woman...do you have to do this pose?? according to this blog is both live pamphlet and magazine photo shooting of course they both in a different area so this studio is for the magazine ^^;;; and nana said she MUST DO THIS POSE OvO....  then back to the pamphlet, is related to her 20th anniversary of the singer's debut, so for me (yes i m going live runner :3) I MUST BUY THIS PAMPHLET!!
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and as usual, her sensei gave her this bento lunch XP during her photo shooting not going into details
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alukaforyou · 4 years
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and ALSO sry to post bs on main im mostly just talking to myself in my personal tag half the time so yolo, no need to respond to this or reassure me or whatever but these days i licherally question how much of my - sry to sound like a broken record - bs is dépression or just my shité mentality, like i rly was not designed to last, huh? physically or mentally? lol. like who gets motion sickness on swings lmao anyways. i think i give up too easily. theres a bunch of reasons y but i dont feel like saying. its a different thing to kind of kno something, and to admit / speak it (confront it). i could psychoanalyze myself all day and tell u exactly why some things are the way they are but its too unpleasant to neatly state stuff like that u kno?? like... *i kno* but im not gonna say i kno. anywho, i digress. so i give up easily and kind of have a defeatist mentality too, its so exhausting lool. actually its weird cuz duality of man, i'll be rly determined / stubborn abt doing some stuff and not care abt fear of failure with certain things but when it comes to My Life / My Future i just think i cant rly do anything? i mean that literally like i got no skillz *laugh crying emoji* not particularly good at anything, and art - the only thing im maybe arguably ok at - i dont wanna do as a career, that is art therapy for me i dont feel like commercializing it. not interested in working in my major, maybe things wouldve been different if i went to culinary or cosmetology school?? that sounds fun. or if i majored in bio cuz i was so good at that, or even if i majored in japanese language or literature or idk. but no regrets tho cuz i learned a lot abt drawing in art school which i can use for myself. and hmm i like staying home and not rly going out of my way to meet new ppl so connections what? i h8 hearing how most opportunities come through the ppl u kno cuz its true and ik like 10 ppl tops so hm very sexi of me :^) i just feel like im p much f*cked and it rly doesnt help that i have no functional dreams, goals, or aspirations nor the confidence and drive to work towards anything so ah ok cool. u kno suga's songs "the last" and "so far away" ? that p much sums up my feels minus the part abt having to deal w fame obviously LOL. its so easy being a student (for me at least) but being a good student isnt really worth a whole lot in the """""real world""""" and the current education system doesnt even rly prepare u for reality or w.e like Deep Sigh also the political climate rly lookin like shité out there like hmmmmm do i even wanna try so hard to be here anymore tho??? also going back to the self confidence thing, ya idk her LOOOOL like it doesnt very much bother me tho? i really, honest to god have no idea what my redeeming qualities even are. being nice? and my mindset re - tolerance and compassion for others, etc, ya im rly proud of that actually but besides that i mean like what can i Do tho like hm im not particularly good at anything also im hideous like uglee but thats ok too like none of this Bothers me, thats just literally how i Am so ok fine, but i feel like it makes it hard for me to exist in the world i happen to be in??? and i realize im speaking with a huge bias here cuz my brain is totally out of whack im p sure if some1 saw me / read this they would lit be like um u literally do not have it hard girl, which is fair ur kinda right actually from an objective pov, probably? its amazing how um. hard? of a time my brain is having given my relatively ok circumstances but thats just how it is ig. and if i may quote shakespeare - o full of scorpions is my mind. and its weird cuz duality of man - i actually have a lot of good times w friends and whatever i have a lot of fun, im not even very Sad or in Agony its all very a mild? sensation? but that might be because my plan b is to simply *** so nothing rly fazes me anymore lool.
its usually a v confusing emotion, im either feeling happy, or if not that, very ???? im literally that duwang quote get a feeling so complicated its just "ajdjsjsja" idk its not overly repulsive and upsetting im like :s LOL u kno wat at this point idek what im even saying anymore but its good that im writing whatever cuz im gonna need to look back on this later and organize my thoughts for presentation cuz remember i have a s.o now???? i wanna let them kno so we r on the same page, and i dont feel like im tricking them, i thought it over more and there are like 4? major cards i wanna lay out on the table early on and they are 1. im not that close w my family emotionally so do not seek their approval or expect to deal with them much. 2. personal ideology / political views like im bi lmao and pro lgbt if that wasnt obvious also i dont rly wanna be around racists / terfs etc and if ur right wing or not on that respect women juice uhhh bye.. 3. my weak ass mentality how i might Maybe *** in the future like no promise but errrr theres one more but its a little more negotiable and also too early to discuss so i wont mention it but i already got the first two outta the way so ya. theres the most troublesome of all, #3. the last thing i wanna do is traumatize someone that loves me (and i love back) with that kinda thing, its too late for my dear friends whom i love, sorry i didnt kno i was gonna be like this LOL yall already got attached but its a little different with my s.o cuz i feel like its not too late to uh.... stop getting as attached LMAO like dam i've known my girls for almost 10 years whereas i've only known my s.o for like a month.
and this is totally not gonna come across right but if my s.o very understandably desides to dump me id be SO RELIEVED LIKE WOOOO ok cool cuz like essentially what i'd be saying is you are getting attached to someone who's future is not as stable as other people, including u. *huge exhale* from the bottom of my heart, my bad lol. and then i probs wont ever get involved w. a s.o again, sorry to reference snk in 2020 but remember how e*win smith is single cuz he doesnt kno when he will ***? big mood. i have never acted out on my interests before but i was like ok for once lets go off the shits and do smth ooc, i uh... didnt expect for it to actually go anywhere tho so now im like ???? i shouldve thought it through more tho, like i felt low key irresponsible af and selfish and dumb for getting involved w. someone even tho i Know how I Am like...... Also i just lov being single and staying home and chilling alone lmao like i seriously...... never get loney....
ok so what was i talking abt? how the passage of time makes me nervous cuz idk how i can manage to keep up w it??? how i feel like i cant do jack shit???? that life is hard???? and maybe a bih just wants to rest? permanently?????? i think the most irritating part of all for me, like what i am most mad about at myself is that i have no dream. yikes. naruto, do u think thats sad? well yoongi said its okay, and what counts is just being happy, so i will console myself and forgive her and idk just try my best for the time being??
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tellmesomethinggg · 4 years
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****
linking this here bc it was technically a journal? i just don’t want it on my notes anymore and if i ever (likely not to) want to re-read for whatever reason. please note that i knew people would read this so things are censored and are the basic version. also there was a switch at one point from **** to chris because i didn’t want things to be read
(for later when i got time lmao)
Matt is a piece of shit that just wants to fuck -Chloe
well fuck
here goes nothing
the plan: don’t get drunk bc i got shit to do early next morning and ill tell him tomorrow when i do get drunk. spoiler alert that didn’t work
Gaby (coles gf) came too btw
so i had a smirnoff ice and said no more than two shots after so id be buzzed but not fully drunk (i ended up having three and was very much drunk)
me jon and gaby we’re talking about guys and i mentioned something about liking a guy or some shit and gaby looks at matt and then me and confirms it with me. then she tells me that apparently when she met me and a few other friends at the beach last quarter, that she predicted the two of us would end up together and told cole this. im like wtf how and she claims she’s psychic lol
later, Matt and i are on the sack and he looks at me and goes do you like me and im thinking well fuck so i say yes and he’s like well shit sorry but (and then i forgot exactly what he said) something along the lines of it’s not mutual or it’s not the right timing (i forgot okay) and then he gets up after a bit to go to the bathroom (I’m pretty sure cole went out too) and then me gaby and Jon have a chisme session and they think that he does like me but whatever
so the guys come back and at this point i really need to pee again so matt offers to take me and we start talking and he’s all, oh im sorry if i led you on and shit and im like it’s alright ill get over it, it just might be a bit awkward for me for a bit. but then on our way back from the bathroom he asks me , do you wanna at least kiss your crush at least one time and im like uhh yeah so he kisses me and then we start talking but i forgot about what and im kinda dizzy so he says, oh let’s sit on the couches for a bit before we go back, so we do and somehow we kiss again and then start making out
and at this point im like bitch there’s no way you don’t like me like why would you do that if you didn’t
so we finally go back and it’s been some time so the rest of em are obviously curious
matt goes with cole to the bathroom again and the three of us have a chisme session otra vez and they’re like yeah he fucking likes you he’s prob just scared bc of his last relationship
cole comes back in and basically backs up their side based on his convo he just had with matt
and so it’s decided that we’ll both sleep on the sack, Jon sleeps on his bed and the other two together in coles bed
he comes back and we all “go to sleep” but I push for him to hold me like he usually does whenever we sleep together and around like 2,3 am we both start making out again and just like uhhhh
also we’re both very much drunk but of course i tend to remember things whenever ive gotten drunk, however, he did not and so now we gotta talk and figure shit out and go from there
also im not telling Emilou or Hanna yet until we figure things out so
yeah
fuck
alrighty, so after last night, ive decided to do absolutely nothing about it and decided to just let things play out the way things do. i don’t wanna say something and ruin our friendship that we have bc i trust him a lot and like hanging out with him, so, i guess the end of this note for now, unless the situation changes anytime soon
Can Tim see what I write on this?     -Chloe
Yes -Janet
Hi Tim!
-Chloe
Tim pls respond.
-Chloe
Hi Chloe! Sorry I have been busy at home LOL
He responded I’m so happy!
-Chloe
FYI im just going to add things at the top of the note so that its easiwr to see stuff when i add it bc then otherwise youd have to scroll a ton
and I’m dating shit so i know when I wrote stuff and my memory and yeahhh
FEB 15 1 pm
chillin in alp so lets get this chisme
alrighty so last night i stayed the night in pratts but it wasnt just me so calmate, it was me and jon bc long story short i was too lazy/dizzy to get up and jons roommate had her bf over. basically we both shared the bed, not a lot of physical contact but whateva
brb
anyways, there was also one point where he was watching a movie from his childhood and idk what tf it was but he was shocked that i havent seen those movies, so apparently now im gonna watch them so i told him for payback we gotta watch disney movies lmao
oh also! i fucking got back to my room and took a shower to get ready for class, and when hanna gets back from class shes all like oh you slept in HiS rOoM huh and i was like uhhh yeah and told her the truth like i was too lazy and dizzy to get up and then she didnt really say anything but uhhhh yikes
and then i mentioned this to emilou later when we were walking to class and shes like yeah idk why she did that that was weird and i was thinking like thank God she doesnt think the same as hanna bc shes also slept in his room on the bean bag a few times
FEB 14 2pm
heyyy its valentines day and guess whos still single and workinggg
so uhhh last night, around 1, both me and pratt finished our shit (hw and studying) and im wide awake so im like hey, brooklyn 99? (because i got him into the show and i love rewatching the show bc its sooo good) and hes down so we start watching in his room. were both on his bed but were sitting (for the tie being) and eventually i decide to lay down and use one of his pillows but its the flat pillow so i attempt to steal his other one, which he protests and we lowkey wrestle over it and eventually i fail ugh and i fall over in frustration and land my head on his knee and then just quit and stay there, but get this, he just deals with it and lays on top of me, like his head is on my side. granted we both also have pillows so like his pillow is in between me and him and same for me but like ughhh
and eventually i fall asleep for like an episode (?) and wake up right before 3 am, and then decide hey sleep sounds important bc i have an 8 am and so does he, so i sit up but im too lazy to get up right away so i sit and go through twitter and shit so chris just lays down with his head on my leg and i set my arm down on his chest and he falls asleep for a few minutes and then i finish going through my social media and every part of me doesnt wanna move, but im also in a position that would be uncomfortable to fall asleep in so i wake him up and then go back to my room
oh and the other thing i forgot was that for a good couple hours we were texting and joking around and yeahhh
i feel like im reading a lot into what happens but at the same time, like i doubt id be this comfortable doing shit with guys like this and idk about him, but like sometimes i wonder you know?
also, saturday night, as far as i know, its just me and him going to the basketball game bc idk who else is going (eye emoji insert here bc im on my computer lmao) so we'll see what happens
FEB 10 11am
okay soooo last night,
the plan was to get buzzed, just me and matt and watch Brooklyn 9-9 but then Anthony and emilou joined us so never mind. after a bit, Anthony leaves so he can answer a phone call and pratt offers me shot #1 and not emilou (she’s laying on the bean bag, I’m on his roommates bed chillin behind her so she can’t see what’s up)
we take two and im slightly buzzed but i think “hey lets see how much we can take before she notices” and he’s down so uhhh let’s get this
later we have to include Anthony and he’s down to see how much we can take and he just lets us continue, i get to 4 shots and he finishes the bottle so i can’t have a 5th
brb im gonna go eat with him
okay im back now...
anyways were both pretty out of it, emilou still hasnt noticed and anthony finds this all funny i assume and so do i , and eventually she finds out and then the two of them leave i guess around 2 am and the two of us are both on the bean bag and were both tired and drunk and drunk me like petting his hair and apparently holding his hand and well yeah i kinda hate drunk me bc if that wasnt obvious enough lmao :/
continuin, we basically end up cuddled together most of the night until we both kind of sober up hella early in the morning and kind of separate a bit
and so in the morning guess who brought it uppp and i at least have an excuse that i was drunk and not thinking and just kinda doing whatever drunk me wanted to do (but omggg his hair is so fucking nice to play with omg) anyways imma just die real quick bc idk what happens now
also since no one else was in the room literally no one else knows about this and i think were keeping it that way bc lets be honest if anyone found out about that i think id be screwed for secret keeping and then well yeah
FEB 8 1AM
i remembered:
sunday 2-3
i forgot this happened but before I ended up in chris’s room i was chillin upstairs watching tv and then he came out on the phone with some one and long story short he said something on the phone to his friend along the lines of “you’re gonna have me in your life for a long time” and when he was saying that i was looking at him bc soy chismosa and i was curious and he winked at me and I died
Monday 2-4
so the other thing that happened was I had lunch/dinner with him before my writing class and no recuerdo que decimos, but uhhhh yeah
i like hanging out with him
also, just got back from his room and am more convinced that he may not like me but actually just sees me as a friend but at the same time maybe he does but IDK
i hate feelings and it’d be so much easier if i didn’t have them sometimes lmaooo
FEB 7 5-7 PM
so im currently in the room rn so im gonna try to make this as chronological as possible
saturday 2-2
alrighty so mind you this is the day ive volunteered with ship and have spent the whole day there, (i dont remember why i thought this was relevant :/)
so saturday night, i go to work in his room around 8 (?) so i can work on my essay and finish my shit bc he has a bean bag thats hella comfy to work on
andd so later on, jocelyn comes in to watch anime with him and then after i finish we all decide to watch gabriel iglesias and ended up squishing together on the bean bag with me in the middle of the two of them
and so were all chillin there, laughing whatever and at one point chris fucking pratt puts his head on my shoulder for a little bit and i dIeDddd
and eventually i fall asleep when we start watching emperors new groove and mind you im fucking next to chris pratt like uhhhh my GOD
so i wake up once the movies over and then go to the bathroom and come back and by then he has taken over the whole bean bag and im sad that i cant just get back and go back to sleep so i go back to my room
(hanna doesnt know what time i get back i think and im pretty sure it was around4 am) (emilous also not here bc she went home for the weekend)
sunday 2-3
so i decide hey i was productive yesterday and decide to return to his room to work on shit and try to get as much done before work in theevening
i finish around 1/2? and then i tell him im bored and i wanna do something before work but idk what so he says lets go to the rec room and its just the two of us and its chillin and he puts me on his story playing pool lmao
and then i go to work :(
but then THEN later after work i go for a run and end up back in his room and theres a couple other people there and so were all chilling (mind you this is around midnight)
and somehow i end up falling asleep on the bean bag next to this girl jon from my hall and (this is a secret in a secret) but i hear her get up at one point and then chris pratt then joins me and during the night im tossing and turning and leaning on him a bit (ughhhh i died a shit ton)
monday 2-4
so in the morning around 720 or so i wake up pay dumb and am like oh whend you get here and he explains and then hes like yeah i dont really know the girl who slept in my bed (one of jons friends) and i figured since im more comfortable with you id just move here (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! fuck me upppp) [please note that when i say fuck me up i dont mean that type of fuck]
alrighty thats what i remember that i havent told you, and then the other bit from the screen record was tuesday and now its thursday and here i am in guess whos room again
possibly staying the night lmao
but jons also here so its not like im staying the night staying the night
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