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butchfalin · 6 months

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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

#yeehaw #1k #5k #10k #posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference #edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense #also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags #1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now #he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic #2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign #like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock #3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing #it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is #extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once #it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life #i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about #Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect #if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it #aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week

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azulas-lightning-bolt · 1 month

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I truly do not know why I am letting this see the light of day, but here.

tw: really bad art under the cut

fem mako with all my little hcs applied so she doesn't look even slightly like the original. you're welcome. I was hunched over my dad's nice drawing computer (he's an architect) for about five hours trying to figure out how to digital art on krita. this is the best I could come up with.

I kind of like this so. I'm gonna yap a bit about my 'artistic intentions'. starting off there's the qipao, which was originally going to be red/gold like the ref pic I used, but then I was like. what if I made her look even more ek. and then the qipao turned green. this was mostly just me testing out shading and stuff, and I'm honestly pretty proud of the qipao in general. it's hard to see in the finished piece, but the contrast between shaded and flat colors is actually insane. I'm not too happy with how Mako herself turned out.

however.

the hair and the makeup are my newest prized possessions. like. the eyeliner. the little hair pieces sticking up from the ears. the lipstick. the little blush. aosufhoafhosaiff. also her eyes?? I wasn't sure but I really wanted to include the central green/gold heterochromia, and this was born. and her little mole. I was giggling to myself drawing that on. I thought the purple snake tatoo on her arm would be a cool nod to some of mako's concept art w an arm tatoo and also a,, backstory,, w the triple threats,, but i didn't really like how it turned out. left it on just because.

and on the topic of her arms. I don't fucking know how to draw burn scars. help. or arms, actually, but whatever. revisiting those the arms are actually so bad but I was staring at the computer screen so long I could taste the colors. I hate anatomy and that is why I write more than I draw. and the fucking lichtenberg scars. I'm on the brink. they look so cool but my hand was cramping so goddamn bad drawing ten thousand little lines on my pixelly fucking krita canvas oh my god. though if i may i would like to direct your attention to the scars on her ear. I thought that was a neat little detail but idk.

otherwise anatomy-related I tried to give her that blocky ek build as well, although I think it came out more clunky than anything. though honestly I’m not too upset as this was a practice. I might go back another day and fix it to be slightly less terrible but. whatever.

uhhh the background was supposed to be the fire nation emblem and her name as, like, a newspaper cover or something. if my handwriting wasn't terrible, I would've written on the little boxes of subtitles like, 'captian and firebender of the up-and-coming probending team, the fire ferrets' and 'the survivors of a true rags-to-riches tale; the background of the newest probenders.' so yeah that was kind of the idea with her name in the back. also she doesn’t have her scarf because uhhh. I forgot it but we’ll just. pretend. idk. I also do not know how to draw scarves so,,, yeah.

i love her so much btw i'm really mentally ill abt her. if anyone has like art tips. please share im really new and really bad at this.

ps: she does still have the eyebrows, the pointy part is just hidden under her hair.

#mako lok #legend of korra #lok #tlok #mako tlok #fem mako #mako fanart #fem mako fanart #sigh #im genuinely so embarrassed posting this #however #it was a labor of love (an intense hyperfixation on mako)#and thus deserves to see the eyes of the public #i'm very sorry to subject you dear viewer to this #but i love her #i kinda want her in a jar on my desk tbh #<-proof of me being absolutely batshit insane #jfgahpishdfas #slug’s stuff

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strwbrysugu · 8 months

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fluff. gojo is whining about cereal.

479 words.

a/n: hi i haven't written in three years pls be nice to me 😭

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gojo satoru is the strongest jujutsu sorcerer.

everyone was aware of that, but what they weren't aware of is that, when gojo satoru was sitting at home, no curses to exorcise; all he really wanted was a bowl of lucky charms. preferably, all marshmallow lucky charms.

how hard was it to make that and sell them to everyone? due to what he referred to as, “madness”, he was in the worst mood that morning. if satoru couldn’t have the cereal he wanted, then happy was the last thing he could be.

you often woke up later than him, so when you found the man sulking on the couch with a pout on his face, you knew you were in for a wild morning.

“hey, toru,” you hesitantly greet him. he takes a glance at you, then at his bowl of cereal. “i have a problem.”

you nod slowly, joining him on the couch. “and what is that?”

“my cereal isn’t full of marshmallows.”

you snort as you lift his bowl up and take a spoonful of cereal. you bring it up to your mouth, only to have it smacked away by satoru. the spoon lands on your floor, the sound, and sight of it making you flinch.

“satoru,” you gasp. “what the fuck?”

“it doesn’t deserve to be eaten.”

a scowl graces his (beautiful) face, accompanied by the shaking of his head. the sound of the bowl being placed on the coffee table catches satoru’s attention and he continues to stare at the sad bowl of cereal.

“are you okay?”

“i'm strong, handsome, funny, i'm almost perfect,” he whines. "the only thing missing is a lifetime supply of marshmallow-only lucky charms."

your loud laugh rings through satoru’s ears, the disappointed look on his face replaced by a look of disgust.

“what are you laughing at?”

“satoru, out of all the problems you could possibly have, you’re angry about cereal?”

satoru was undeniably upset. but the sound of your laughter and smile that he would do anything to keep, has one tugging at his lips. he figured he could be upset about it later. for now, he wanted to enjoy how beautiful you looked as you teased him for whining about something stupid.

“you're so pretty,” a hand snakes around your waist, and you feel his lips press a long kiss on your cheek.

“there are two boxes of lucky charms left," you grin. "how about we pick all the marshmallows out for you?”

his eyes light up, and before you can get another word in, you’re being tugged into the kitchen.

while you’re stressing about the amount of time it’s going to take you, satoru stares at you with the utmost adoration in his eyes. you seem to surprise him every day, just when he thinks he can’t fall even more in love with you, you prove him wrong.

#gojo x reader #gojo x you #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru x you #gojo satoru #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen x you #gojo fluff #gojo satoru fluff #jujutsu kaisen fluff #im genuinely terrified posting this #all the jjk writers are so goodd #i should be Embarrassed

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papertowness · 3 months

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i can’t stop thinking about how wilson’s need to be needed and house’s need to be needed are such twisted mirror parts of each other and house points it out in wilson as a flaw constantly because he sees it himself too , but not in the same way .

because wilson sees his need to be needed as something pure , as something he does because he wants to help , and in a sense this is true . they need me to help them and this makes it the right thing because i will help them . the need to be needed cant be a bad thing because i use it for good . at least in his eyes and a lot of times it’s mirrored that way in the eyes of the audience .

house needs to be needed so he knows he’s not obsolete . he needs people to ask for his help , he needs people to come crawling to him and telling him he was right . it’s an ego boost for him , it’s a fix — i need people to need me to be reassured . and he reconciles with this — he doesn’t think it makes him a good person in the same way wilson does . he doesn’t see it as anything good .

which makes their role - reversals when it comes to this part of them so interesting and why house vs . god is SUCH a good episode because wilson temporarily is in house’s shoes — he’s doing something not because it’s right but because it aligns more with house ‘ need to be needed ‘ . there is nothing good and nothing that he can do to help the patient he goes out with but he does it anyway because he likes the feeling that someone needs him . and house is in the opposite situation , in wilson’s shoes if you will . i need to help you , i need to help her , i need you to see that this is wrong . house sees this — i think it’s why he brings up this subject so heavily in this episode and i also think it’s why he brings it up again in ‘ son of coma guy ‘ .

because as aforementioned house doesn’t see it as a virtue or a good thing . i think that’s why he sees it as such a glaring flaw in wilson , because he sees it in himself . in his eyes , it doesn’t matter how wilson frames it , because he does the same thing — which probably makes wilson more like him than he’s comfortable with .

anyways when the narrative gives two characters the exact same qualities in opposite directions and draws parallels between it it makes me go absolutely crazybatshitinsane

#im so insufferable over this . genuinely why did they do this #lmfao i can imagine the writers reading this post and being like it was really never that deep but ok #i can’t believe i’m analyzing an early 2000s medical drama like this . genuinely fucking embarrassing #anyways #house #house md #houseposting #james wilson #gregory house #greg house #medical malpractice #hate crimes md #hilson #lgbtq #lgbt

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ruporas · 1 year

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revisiting a memory

#kingdom hearts #roxas #roxas kh #cue dearly beloved #a tune i'll never forget for the rest of my life actually #i could Overshare so much of my memories about kh in these tags but i think i will refrain #its so embarrassing but.#yeah. im just posting some kh work ive done awhile back... there was a particular time during the summer #where i was just rereading the 358/2 days novel #and roxas has always shined as a character to me. and most people who got obsessed over kh2 the moment it came out #and maybe its just me who when rereading the 358/2 novel got particularly focused on the perspective of axel and xion's bc it wasnt as #explored in game but #seeing roxas' actions and emotions pour through from another person's lens #like axel's and xion's. man. he's just so genuine and always has been and it's so clear the one thing he wants :(#im RAMBLING again but i love kh #anyway #gk posting soon #ruporas art

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pcktknife · 3 months

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I feel like the most annoying person in the world like 90% but if I could just like own it then that'd probably fix my issue. one day maybe

#i just feel like if i open my mouth im gonna piss someone off or if i say something to someone theyd rather i just hadnt spoke at all #i cant believe this is still something that troubles me its so annoying #my friends and mutuals dont secretly hate me and i am a genuine delight to be around. (u_u)#kae.txt #anyways gonna go play games for like 5mins forget i posted this and get embarrassed when i see it when i come back baiii ^_^

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oceanwithouthermoon · 4 months

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kubosai enjoyers can we all kiss please im begging :((

#unless ur under the age of 17 ig i'll just give u a fist bump or whatever #anyway im so fucking obsessed with them #had a new years party with my friends and we played a camera roll game and kubosai fanart popped up and it was genuinely so embarrassing om #its fine. its fine.#im almost 19 fucking years old i cannot afford to be getting embarrassed about my silly ship fanart #OKAY ANYWAY im thinking about kubosai new years kiss hehehe #they. ugh. LITERAL FIREWORKS IN THE BACKGROUND AS THEY KISS UGHHH.#saiki k #tdlosk #the disastrous life of saiki k.#saiki kusuo #kuboyasu aren #kubosai #meows post

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beforeyougo-turnthebiglightoff · 14 days

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wish i was one of those people who could freely send hate comments because some of these swifties are so dense its so embarrassing to even use the same app at them

#this is about swifties who hate matty specifically #like are you thicckkkkk i saw this woman say like #“maddie healy is probably looving all the attention rn he gives Narcissist vibes” ?? r u for real #like thats so embarrassing for you genuinely id have to kms if i posted that in full seriousness and thought it was true #it makes me crinngggge so bad like im so srs when i ask. are you dense. were you dropped as a child #its so blegh like??#go for his political views but dont you fucking dare start shitting on him for his looks or addiction?? pieces of shit #sorry im really pissed off rn because some of these people need humbling like badly #it makes me like unwll how angry i am #blah blah!#matty healy

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bandtrees · 7 months

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iv been doing a lot of ddadds reminiscing lately. that game is very very close to my heart and has been for years - it's kind of surreal to return to the fancontent i made for it having grown a bit, and seeing precisely why i latched onto mary as a character as much as i did. (hmm, the guy who'd just gotten out of a bad relationship and was also an unknowing aroace latched onto the character with relationship troubles and conflicts about presenting as someone in love, who would've thought?) (also she's autistic) (i'll still fight people on this)

mary still continues to be one of my favorite characters of all time - and i still have dream daddy to thank for a lot. it's just such a genuinely warm and sweet and funny game. it's got such a kind and lackadaisical approach to adulthood that spoke to and continues to speak to me a lot as someone kind of terrified of growing up, in a lot of ways. and despite being such a silly game, joseph's ideals of the "margarita zone" spoke to me way more than i care to admit.

i wonder if the people i'd shared ddadds servers with and the like, way back in 2019, are doing well. i wonder if the old friend i did that batshit insane mary-damien cult ending rp with that read like a damn slasher film remembers it at all. i hope the people i talked about my ocs with are doing well. i hope the mary rper i lurked on the blog of is doing well. i hope the person who made the official character spotify playlist knows how much they shaped my music taste and how much i listen to them to this day. i hope the developers of this game know it's more than a silly gimmick dating sim that was popular for a year to people. (i hope they know how much damn gender euphoria it gives me lol)

i'm a huge sap with my fandoms in general. but dream daddy's such a spot of comfort for me even now. i still think about it, and maybe one day i'll properly revisit it. and i know i'm going to be so insufferable about it when i do. my own special little margarita zone.

#babbles #ddadds #dream daddy #dream daddy a dad dating simulator #mary christiansen #comfort characters #its so funny to reread on the rocks (my old robert/mary postdivorce fic)#not because im embarrassed of it or anything but the recurring themes in it in retrospect #of love and romance being a scary evil construct and its so much safer and happier to just be close with your friends and not worry about #defining it...#Bestie you were talking about a qpr. You're aromantic.#its the most 'the author of this hasnt realized theyr aro' fic ever. i love it so genuinely #i was cooking though MORE FRIENDS TO LOVERS ROBERT AND MARY PLEASE GOD. THEY ARE SO BI4BI IS ANYONE HEARING ME #this is kind of embarrassing to post but i would rather be full of love and cringe than have people not know how much i love things #INCLUDING the silly dad dating sim from 2017.#that i still hold to people being way too hard on etc etc but you could figure that by how much i sing its praises haha

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c0l0re · 2 months

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Every time I see a post about Jonmartin being toxic I get just a little bit closer to commiting arson

#colore speaks #not main tagging this because i genuinely do not want this to become A Thing but god #im not going to get into all of it here because i have already spent a frankly embarrassing amount of time discussing this with friends #i have gone point by point. season by season. i have looked at this from so many fucking angles man #istg i will write an actual analysis post on these two eventually #is their relationship perfect? fuck no it is absolutely not #is it toxic? also no #like. their relationship is flawed and theyve both got a lot of issues but that does not equal toxicity #also id like to remind people: we dont see what happens off tape. we only see what the Web deemed as important or necessary #in other words: we only see them when they are suffering and tensions are running higher than normal #we dont see their lunches together in season two. we dont see their time at the safehouse. we dont see them when they arent suffering #this is one of those things about tma that i am so passionate about and am so certain on #i have spent way too long analyzing these fuckers both seperately as characters and also together as a couple #they have issues. im not denying that whatsoever #but to say that theyre toxic or that their relationship could never work or whatever else is just not true and i will die on that hill #nuance people. please. this is not a black and white thing #(not getting into this either but: this is also coming from someone whos been in toxic and abusive relationships)#(i know what that shit looks like and this is not it)

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hella1975 · 3 months

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what does it mean to average 2:1 or 2:2? I don’t think we do that in America

okay so the uni grading system here is done based on percentages. the pass mark is 40%, which americans ALWAYS hit me with 'only 40???? easy!!!' so id like to clarify the content/exams are very difficult and the marking is very mean and generally it's really frustrating when people respond this way, like why tf would we have such a low pass grade otherwise it's a dumb assumption to make but anyway. you do about 6 modules a semester (on average, some courses have more/less), and each module will give you a final grade, and then the average of all your modules from both semesters will give you your final year grade. they're all marked by the same system, which is:

grade of less than 40% = fail

grade of 40%-50% = third class honours (called a third)

grade of 50%-60% = lower second class honours (a 2:2, literally said aloud as 'i got a two-two in my exam')

grade of 60%-70% = upper second class honours (a 2:1, said as 'i got a two-one'). this is what im PRAYING for.

grade of 70%+ = first class honours (just called a first). this is the highest you can get, so even if you get 90% you'll have the same grade as someone who got 72%. this is also what i mean by the exam system being really tough here, bc most people are just grateful to get a first.

#so last year i got averages of just over 60 in a lot of my modules but also some that i BARELY scraped a pass #bc id resat them and when you resit an exam (bc you failed the first time. lol. lmao) then even if you get 100% on the resit #they will cap you at 40%. so naturally it shafts your average #but i STILL SOMEHOW MANAGED TO AVERAGE WITH A 2:1 LAST YEAR WHICH IS WHY IN THAT POST I MADE BACK THEN I WAS FREAKINGGG OUT #bc that's genuinely such a good grade like that's an UPPER SECOND CLASS HONOURS and i never considered i could do that #bc of how much this degree has pumelled me into the mud. so yeah now that i know it's actually potentially feasible #im really really hoping to keep it up and end with a 2:1 #bc traditionally (and im not saying this is a correct way to think. you're not gonna see me of all people yapping about good grades #have you SEEN the state of my academics) a first or a 2:1 are considered the best outcomes with a degree #while a 2:2 is shrug not bad not great and anything lower is considered 'embarrassing'#and i literally MADE PEACE with the fact id be getting a piss poor grade out of econ so to find out all my hard work and struggling #MIGHT ACTUALLY PAY OFF ON PAPER??? WHEN IT LITERALLY NEVER HAS BEFORE???? POPPING MY PUSSY #ask #hella goes to uni

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the-nightmare-theater · 4 months

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me if i see one (1) more person severely mischaracterize bedman