#incest implication cw

[bonefall]

Clear Sky is a Monster.

Of all the characters in Warrior Cats, I think Clear Sky was the most heavily mishandled.

At every turn, the narrative begs you to sympathize with him, to "understand" the "misunderstood." To this end, his brother Gray Wing is used to "keep faith" in his inherent goodness, his abused son, Thunder, is forced to go back to him over and over, and his second dead wife is completely lobotomized in death to absolve him of all sin.

Because of this, of all this set-up for the "redemption" arc they're trying to tell in the last three books, DOTC is Clear Sky's story. Everything primarily exists to benefit and serve his arc. Thunder and Gray Wing might have POVs, but HE is the character who truly drives the plot. So in order to HAVE conflict for that back half, two evil foreign cats, Slash and One Eye, are summoned to act as contrast.

Their narrative purpose is to display "true evil" to make Clear Sky look less bad in comparison. Unfortunately, Clear Sky is the most malignant, deadly character who has ever blighted Warrior Cats.

The "pure evil" examples they summon aren't effective contrasts because they're flat. Clear Sky is what real abusers look like.

His rhetoric is what it sounds like when a cult leader is trying to keep control over a group. He lies when it benefits him, justifies his actions with his tragic backstory to assuage his guilt and manipulate others, and violently lashes out when his feelings are hurt before blaming his victim for making him angry.

He only made "some mistakes" in that SOME of his actions were accidents-- the vast majority of them were malicious, self-absorbed, intentional choices to punish, hurt, and kill others.

I've spoken about Bumble. I've tallied his body count next to Tigerstar. I've talked about how his infant son's death was his fault in sequel books, and called attention to the infected wound face shoving scene that no one talks about. I can't fit every detail into a single post-- because he's so rancid that I would practically be posting entire books.

So what I want to do here is tackle the heart of Clear Sky. Everything he does, everything he's motivated by, is absolute and utter control over other people. He leverages his "trauma" to evoke empathy from his targets to make them easier to manipulate. He's a dirty liar. He breaks down to physical violence when all other tactics stop working.

He's one of the most severe and realistic abusers I've ever read about outside of very adult literature-- and when I read the reasons why he's attracted to Star Flower, my stomach immediately lurched.

The Killing of Misty

Starvation Rhetoric and the Memory of Fluttering Bird

Aside; a question

Hunger as a punishment; he doesn't care about starvation

Exoneration arc

Predation: Star Flower is a replacement for his son.

I think that index is an evocative content warning. But to say it again; this post contains child and domestic abuse, physical assault, public humiliation, incestuous grooming implications, and a lot of murder.

I need to start with the death of Misty. I see a few people saying that Clear Sky killed her for "being on his land" or trespassing, but this is actually a misstatement that I feel is important to correct.

Misty and her children were on their own land. It was her house. Clear Sky killed her to take it.

This is one of the most important details to remember about Clear Sky, that this is the consistent end point of his obsessive need for power and control. By harassment, by violence, or by death, he will brutalize anyone who does not give him what he wants, or who makes him feel bad, and find some way to justify it.

This territory expansion was for no logical reason. There was plenty of food and plenty of land. Any aggression that's happening on this territory is in response to how he's been stealing land and mauling people.

When it's found out she was fighting to defend her children, Clear Sky's immediate response is to slaughter them too.

Petal doesn't have milk either. It wasn't about the logistics. He wanted to kill the kids, because looking at them made him feel bad, and she just managed to stop him.

Starvation Rhetoric and the Image of Fluttering Bird

It is often said that Clear Sky is doing this because he's "traumatized" from how his little sister, Fluttering Bird, starved to death in the mountains. That the emotion came from wanting to feed people. That's incorrect. It wasn't about food. Fluttering Bird's death, and all the "starvation" he's faced, are used as manipulation tactics to guilt, influence, and control other characters, particularly when he might meet resistance or be held accountable for something.

It was always, ALWAYS, about control.

He does not care about actually helping people; "Starvation Rhetoric" through Fluttering Bird is an image he can invoke to justify the actions that are as bloody and cruel as the one this post starts off with. Either in his own mind, or in the minds of the cats he's manipulating.

He does this to Falling Feather, before slicing her face open in anger when she doesn't buy it. He does it to Rainswept Flower, before he strangles her to death. And he does it in the chapter just before Misty's murder, both to his Clan and then to Thunder,

Clear Sky climbed up in front of an entire crowd and gave a grand speech about hunger and "adjusting" the borders around territory he plans to conquer. When he gets to "forgiveness" he feigns pain to make his point because he is performing. If the sentiment is not a total lie, then at bare minimum, he is intentionally playing this up for the crowd.

He is rallying the Clan to support his violence against the cats whose land he wants to steal, and selling it with his life's hardships.

The audience is clearly well-trained, because several cats recognize the cue, particularly Frost who is praised for loudly comforting him. This signals "loyalty" because showing your sympathy towards his "suffering" is how this type of emotional manipulation works. It creates a persecuted, righteous in-group.

He's also apparently used this tactic before, since this entire crowd knows what "I Would Never Forgive Myself " means.

He's made sycophants out of his followers. Like a cult leader.

His abused son, however, hasn't been fully indoctrinated yet. Seeing Thunder uncomfortable with the idea of expanding the borders for no reason, Clear Sky calls him over for a personal propaganda session.

Clear Sky begins the exchange by calling this a "duty" and a "great honor." Immediately framing what he plans to do as righteous.

He puts on the act when Thunder shows resistance, dramatically pausing to let the guilt trip sink in.

"Thunder waited, realizing that he said the wrong thing."

And then Clear Sky launches into infantilizing Thunder, talking down to him like a child who's too inexperienced to see the "signs of starvation," acting like he's being "patient" in "explaining" it.

And then we get it. "I know what starvation looks like (so stop trusting your own eyes) because I have been through more than you (so shut up and do what I tell you), and I'm being a HERO for what I'm about to do (so opposing me would make you a bad person)."

Thanks to these crocodile tears, looking "moved," the act works. The victim is immediately wracked by guilt because the abuser seems genuinely emotional.

He even lovebombs him over the corpse of Misty in the next chapter, making Thunder feel threatened.

Thunder doesn't have the words to describe what is happening to him, but he knows that this sudden snap to praise isn't natural. That something is very wrong.

A Question.

Before I move on to show that this IS an act, and that he is lying about how important avoiding starvation is to him, I will ask a question. Please think about it, because I promise I mean it genuinely;

Why does it matter if Clear Sky actually believes this or not?

The victims are just as dead either way, yes? Thunder is just as abused and guilt tripped. The entire Clan has been driven towards violence while coddling and cooing at their Supreme Leader. Clear Sky is slowly annexing the entire forest. If you have ever accepted that he had "good intentions" as an excuse for the harm he did, or that abuse and murder was what he imagined was "the right thing," or that his trauma justifies the way he leverages his own pain to make cats do what he wants... why do you think that?

Why does that make it morally better, as the narrative concludes? Would you accept the same for every other WC villain or antagonist? Tigerstar? Slash? Tom the Wifebeater? Brokenstar? Rainflower?

How could you tell the difference, if you couldn't read their actual thoughts on the page? ...are there any other "good intentions" you've accepted, somewhere else?

Don't share that answer with me. It's a question for you. Sit with it.

Hunger as a punishment; he doesn't care about starvation.

...but, regardless, Clear Sky is not deluded about starvation. It's a justification for his obsessive need for control, and always has been. There was no shortage before stealing Misty's land and kits, he is fully aware that there's more prey than they can eat.

He punishes Falling Feather with hunger and harassment for thought crime, by briefly thinking of leaving. But first, he invokes Fluttering Bird at her like he did before, flying into a screeching fit of rage when she doesn't buy it,

"I'm sorry I hurt you... BUT" is THE wifebeater phrase. THE stereotypical line of a domestic abuser. "I'm sorry I hit you... but it's your fault for making me so angry."

She went through the same exact starvation he did, calls out that he's just framing his greed as being for the collective benefit of his subjects, and is assaulted for that.

When we're in his head, we see his REAL concerns are not about hunger. He invoked Fluttering Bird to try and make her shut up and bow down to him; what he's focused on is her "gossiping" and "whining" about the open wound he left on her face. He's still furious at Fircone and Nettle for how Thunder QUESTIONED him. So he will "strengthen their commitment."

When "starvation" DOES enter his thoughts, it is to assuage his own guilt and JUSTIFY what he already did. What he already WANTS to do. It's post-hoc.

He had to suppress his own guilt at how his greed and ambition made these children into orphans, completely unable to admit that he's ever been wrong or has a change to make, so he invokes the starvation rhetoric at himself to excuse it. So he feels less bad.

Everything, EVERYTHING, in this confrontation is about his pleasure at being able to torment his subordinates. To continue the abuse when the initial confrontation is over. If it isn't pride in his power and control over them, it's plain sadism.

He invokes starvation in front of the crowd, again, after being pleasured at the guilt in her eyes, hoping that everyone sees her writhing with shame and embarrassment. Fear wasn't at the root of why he assaulted Falling Feather; rage was, and now he feels better that he got to humiliate the person who offended him.

Starvation Rhetoric is a manipulation tactic.

It goes RIGHT BACK to his twisted idea of "loyalty." Obedience.

A cat who's actually, primarily concerned about starvation wouldn't encourage other cats to steal her food if they feel like it. He wouldn't be using it as a weapon to retaliate against her because she hurt his feelings.

This is paired with the fact he restricts and monitors the diet of his cats. They eat when he allows it, and only what he gives them, in spite of there being piles of dead animals rotting, going to waste.

We then find he personally doles out food from these piles, plucking carcasses off them and flinging them at his cats, one by one. Probably so he can watch how grateful they are to him and make sure they stay a little hungry-- and definitely because it means he can control WHO gets to eat at all.

If Clear Sky chucked a mouse at Falling Feather and someone took it? She would have gone hungry. For not groveling to him. Like when he decides to starve her brother; a hostage who he promised to feed and care for.

He's a dishonest snake. He lied about abandoning baby Thunder, calling it a "test of strength," he lied about Bumble's death, he lied about keeping Jackdaw's Cry fed.

And he lied about starvation to Thunder, because he was just making up an excuse to steal more land.

He wasn't "seeing the signs" of starvation when he moved to "adjust" his borders. Even FURTHER into this so-called "delusional slip" into tyranny, he's freely admitting that it takes months for a person to starve when it benefits his sadistic need to punish undeserving cats.

"Dumb moor cats, always expecting more than they DESERVE."

Not need. DESERVE. It's not a delusion about starvation and it never was. STARVATION is how he CONTROLS SkyClan, and once again he's angry that his pleasure has been sullied.

The massacre at Fourtrees was started over Jackdaw's Cry catching a bat after being starved, on land that Clear Sky has decided RIGHT NOW that he also owns, because it mades him think about being disobeyed.

The bat is forgotten as Clear Sky pivots into a tantrum, wanting to make his family HURT for being 'disloyal' and 'ungrateful.' For leaving him. He LIKES seeing people grovel, cower, and beg, getting PLEASURE from watching how he can hurt and command other cats, and if you don't give him what he wants he will kill you.

Which, make no mistake, is what the "First Battle" actually is. Clear Sky attempting to murder those who don't worship him or swear their undying fealty to him and his twisted dictatorship. Particularly his own son, the most prominent victim of his emotional abuse.

It's not about the bat. It was never even about food or starvation. It's about retaliation for any perceived lack of control.

Once again he breaks out starvation rhetoric to try and manipulate someone, and when Rainswept Flower doesn't buy it just like Falling Feather didn't, he murders her in another fit of entitled rage.

Exoneration arc.

At the end of this battle that was entirely his own fault, we're introduced to the hollowed-out ghost of Storm. She has been flushed of all personality, so that she can be the perfect narrative mouthpiece.

She accepts yet another Fluttering Bird Invocation in spite of how we saw it's not sincere. He was lying the entire time and using starvation rhetoric as a manipulation tactic to get control over his victims.

And that's it.

That's the consequence. Storm's a little mad at him until he says "Buttering Flird" and she swoons.

He doesn't have to be ""afraid"" anymore because the cats just invented an afterlife to believe in. He keeps all of his power and influence and gets off scot-free, because "guilt" (which we SAW him repressing anyway) is supposed to be the best consequence for murder, abuse, and tyranny.

The husk of Storm even materializes again at the end of book 5 to say it outright; he "never drove anyone away." Not even after Book 4 where it's also his fault One Eye took over his Clan for 5 minutes. It was just destiny.

His "redemption arc" is just an exoneration arc. The narrative doesn't think he really did anything wrong.

EVERYTHING about Clear Sky has ALWAYS been about making grabs at power, but since the narrative didn't see a problem with him extorting his personal tragedy and the death of a child, his own sister, he continues doing it. As if these behaviors are normal personality 'traits'.

Even when that sister COMES OUT OF HEAVEN TO YELL AT HIM DIRECTLY,

He finds a way to COMPLETELY miss the point, so he can interpret her words in a bizarrely specific way that will conveniently end with him being the supreme dictator of the entire forest. Just like he ALWAYS does.

It's the entire 5th book. Clear Sky trying to convince everyone, including himself, that it's Fluttering Bird who wants him to grab at power, NOT himself and his own ambition, that THIS time, he promises, for realsies, it's actually about keeping everyone safe.

But just like ALWAYS, because he does not change, when this tried and true tactic manages to work on Thunder, during ANOTHER exchange where he's dramatically pausing and using the cold shoulder to make his pitiable act land harder,

He lapses right back into bullying his child, creating situations where Thunder will have difficulty or be put in pain, so that he can have an excuse to mock and belittle him.

And this all comes to a head when Clear Sky takes romantic interest in Star Flower, his abused son's previous romantic interest.

Predation: Star Flower is a replacement for his son.

Direct parallels are drawn between Thunder and Star Flower. Star Flower contrasts her loyalty to her father to Thunder's "disloyalty" to his own, in an appeal to Clear Sky.

Clear Sky brushes it off for now, citing that he cannot accept her because of who her father was.

But then, Thunder makes the connection between himself and her, because he knows what it is like to be a victim of parental abuse and correctly clocks that they have this in common,

On his vouch, Clear Sky accepts her into the group. She starts trying to offer himself to him; hunting twice as hard as the others, self-imposing harsh conditions like taking a wet sleeping spot. In their second interaction, Clear Sky begins to take interest in her.

Thunder himself points out that Star Flower is seeking an abusive tyrant to replace her own father, which reads like he's deflecting the stress of how his father is abusing him to deny a connection he already made. As if Thunder sees so much of himself in Star Flower that it makes him (rightly) feel sick that his father is romantically invested in her;

Thunder then goes on to follow his own advice and form his own Clan, because Clear Sky IS like One Eye... while Star Flower remains here. At Clear Sky's side. Because she feels like this is what she "deserves," that she "understands" him, truly believing that her crime (warning her father that Clear Sky brought an ambush in case he lost the 1 on 1 death match he requested, which he did) are on the same level as his abuse and murders.

Clear Sky is attracted to Star Flower because, in his own words;

She is young.

She will not betray him.

She won't question him,

and she obeys him.

We've seen what "betrayal" is to Clear Sky-- not taking his excuses or his beatings. To "disobey" is betrayal. To "question" is disobedience.

These are ALL things he's tried to drill into Thunder. We saw him happily exploit their difference in age to tell him he can't have an opinion. He constructed humiliating games in retaliation for ever being questioned. He tried to murder Thunder and his friends for their "betrayal." Even now, being disobeyed causes explosive reactions.

He was previously grooming the things he now identifies as attractive in a young woman into his child.

If your body becomes too useless to serve him, like Frost and Jagged Peak, you're thrown out. If you don't unquestioningly follow his bloody commands, like Falling Feather or Thunder, you're subjected to abuse and public humiliation. If you're in his way, like Misty or Rainswept Flower were, you die.

If you meet all of his expectations...

You will be in a horrific position where you will never have agency over your own life ever again. Every move, every word, will have to be carefully crafted so that he feels like you're "loyal" to him by the arbitrary standard he feels that day. Never step out of line, never doubt his decisions, never live for anyone except him and the children you will give him, not even for a moment, because then you will not be "worthy" of his grace.

Star Flower would be in serious danger if this series wasn't written by abuse apologists. They accidentally wrote a perfect reflection of how child abuse victims often find themselves in unsafe and toxic romantic relationships with large age gaps which mirror what they went through as kids; but this team doesn't clock it, playing this relationship as wholesome and genuine.

He finally has someone who ""understands"" him. Because they think the character they wrote is misunderstood.

but reality is plain to see.

Clear Sky is a monster. The most realistic monster in all of WC-- far, far closer to real life predators and domestic abusers than the "born evil" rogues like Slash and One Eye. The Erins seem to believe that what separates Clear Sky from One Eye is "fundamental" good and "fundamental" evil, when the truth is that they'd be separated by very, very little.

If they had realistic motivations, they would be exactly like the character their existence is meant to excuse.

Slash and One Eye HAD to be kept flat and one-dimensional. If the book was more earnest, the only difference between Clear Sky and One Eye would have been that One Eye is stronger. So strong that Clear Sky needed to manipulate the other groups into helping him.

While anyone can change, not everyone will, and Clear Sky has no reason to. He sees no consequences. He has everything he wants; power, a pretty and obedient young mate, and unchecked authority over a brainwashed forest cult. There is always a victim on a leash, a naive enabler, or a bunch of desperate and gullible marks somewhere in his proximity to bully into doing his dirtywork

Whether his "intentions" were sincere or not (evidence points towards not) at its root it was always about control. Power is something he perpetually keeps, and continues to violently use.

#Cw incest #Incest implication #Child abuse #Cw child abuse #Domestic abuse #Cw domestic abuse #Clear Sky #Warrrior cats analysis #Clear Sky wc #Star Flower #Dotc hate #Star Flower wc #Thunderstar #Cw Abuse #Abuse #Cw grooming #Grooming #Ask to tag #I know this is a really fucking heavy one #I had several people read this for me beforehand to double and triple check what I'd written. #And im relieved that it's finally finished.

[ladyculebras]

Writing patterns tag game!

tagged by @buddyaldridge

Rules: list the first line of your last 10 (posted) fics and see if there's a pattern!

“Hey, before you go,” Dean catches his attention before he drops Sam off for the evening. 

2. This is not the first time it happens. 

3. Betty Cooper is asleep in the next room, and his son’s thigh pressed against his own in the dark feels mildly dangerous. 

4. Dexter thinks he can divide time into a before and after Kurt. 

5. After Haddonfield, Corey shows up on her doorstep.

6. Teddy Flood steps off a train, loud and raucous, filled with newcomers. 

7. I shouldn’t be here, Lottie thinks, as she steps out of the cab.

8. The first time he kisses Brian, he freaks out on him. 

9. Sam calls him crying, voice raw, stretched tight with fear and anxiety. 

10. Beverly Keane’s throat is an inviting mass of red blood vessels, soft pale yielding flesh, whip-corded veins that would have been ugly before are tantalizing now.

So I am not sure what my pattern is, but looking at this, I tend to name a character. It's not always the character that is the point of view (Beverly Keene, Betty Cooper, Corey), but someone is doing something, for the most part.

I tag: whoever wants to do it, but tag me :D

#1 #2 #3 #4 #5 #about me #meme #incest cw #just for the implications

[horrorlesbion]

not even dating men anymore and she's still not beating the allegations </3

#luckily betty isnt actually anything like hiram #its just very very funny they chose to repeat this specific (visual) language #riverdale #veronica lodge #beronica #captains log #incest cw #for the implications

[fluentisonus]

#thoughts #music #incest cw #<- like for real. sorry. that's child ballads for you though #there's something really compelling abt this one in a dark way. like it's just so grim & contextless yet full of implication idk #also i like this recording

[cockworkangels]

honestly i think it was the more insane route to take with this episode that the siren pretends to be dean's little brother instead of just making it so that dean wants to fuck some guy. like much more to unpack here with this little brother thing and a lot of it. well. lmao. ms. humphris you sure made some choices

#genuinely like 🧍‍♂️ #cw incest #i mean not really but just in case. but like the implication is there. and idk if it's on purpose but. like idk. #anyways not gonna get into it more but like ms. humphris you sure made some choices #s4 rewatch #4x14 sex and violence

[frociaggine]

Did John resurrect Alfred and Augustine with the knowledge they were brothers, or did he gently inform them before anything happened once the orgies started

I think he told them but. Sorry to say. I also think after a couple of centuries it stops being a deal breaker. They've definitely AT LEAST double teamed someone.

#I am always thinking about Harrow YOU AND YOUR CAVALIER WERE WEDDED? and augustine isn't exactly horrified by the implications #incest cw #anonymous #ask

[frankensteincest]

reading a manga where one twin kills their parents for preferring the other over him and asks the other years later to eat him vampirically to finish what they started in the womb.... maybe I do enjoy family stories.

#log. #also has two other vampires who may or may not be siblings #swapping blood and other fluids #and other lineage fuckery subplot characters #thinking many thoughts. and blood #obsessed with blood and its implications / consequences #cw incest #?

[marmolita]

I'm very much not into mpreg but ngl I can't stop thinking about whether the reason Cas couldn't "have" Dean is because of angel nephilim mpreg magic

#if they fucked and gave magic birth to a nephilim then like #what are the incest implications for that nephilim and jack #spn #mpreg cw

[chair-potatoe]

Rhaenyra and Daemon Taygaryen be like:

#has this been done yet #house of the dragon #game of thrones #got #cw incest #at least the implication i guess #hotd #rhaenyra targaryen #daemon targaryen

[arieswritez]

puppy love

puppy love | yandere!mark grayson x afab!reader | MULTI-CHAP: 3

chapter 2

cw; DARK CONTENT!!! MDNI!!! reader is neurodivergent, ableism, growing up is messy & adults suck, angst, niceguy™/slight incel mark, childhood friend/bully!mark, mark gets his powers sooner, teeny tiny implications of pseudo incest (blink and you'll miss it), violent rape, threats of violence, & canon typical violence, stalking, implied murder, gender & body dysphoria, mentions/implications of disordered eating, mark teases reader about their body once, overall asshole mark, implied grooming (mark handles it but he's a lil bitch about it later), so, victim blaming, misogyny, the inexplicable horrors of being afab, objectification, sexualization

about; you don't know how long i could stare into your picture and wish that it was me i guess it's different 'cause you love him but i've got an interactive sick and twisted imagination and that's gotta count for something - not allowed (tv girl)

3.

you'd found a boy that made your heart go thump thump, thump. and you knew very well how the rest of that story usually went.

your love was encompassing. asphyxiating and obsessive. and in the very first moment the two of you interacted, you knew, this could be it.

you didn't blame yourself.

you couldn't blame yourself.

blame the love stories.

the disney movies with the princes and the magic mirrors. breaking curses with true love's kiss. much like the fabricated sugary fantasies, your potential life with him unfolded before your eyes.

he could be the one.

true love's forever kiss.

you imagined it all.

movie theater dates, awkward parental meetings, proposals, a home, kids, pets. arguments. therapy, even. pushing through at the end. death. rebirth. trying it all over again in the next life.

all you had to do was get him to stick around.

you had to make him understand that you could be his true love kiss, too.

you had to be perfect.

. . there was just one miniscule problem.

the boy so happened be on the same baseball team as mark.

it's the way the two of you had met.

despite the fact that you were supposed to be there for mark: your eyes were . . elsewhere. your eyes - then your focus - had gravitated towards him even before the first pitch. and you found yourself blushing as you watched him stretch: holding his baseball bat over his head.

you'd made it your only goal to attempt to extract as much information about it from mark as discretely as you could. and frankly, you should've known mark would be able to read you like the back of his hand.

because he found out what you were trying to do embarrassingly quickly.

and he was just as quick to shut it down.

you hadn't noticed the boy before. not really. but since the baseball game, he seemed to be everywhere. and you were excited to find that he was the new addition to mark's friend group. you knew this because you saw him and mark sitting together during lunch.

which meant they were at least acquaintances.

so imagine your shock when you came to find out. . mark didn't like him.

everything about him seemed to rub mark the wrong way. mark would clam up the moment you mentioned your boy. he'd change the subject. or his mood would just straight up sour. he'd go quiet and avoidant. and when you kept pushing, he finally snapped.

your boy was stupid.

your boy was shallow.

"don't say i didn't warn you." mark would mumble.

but warning you wasn’t enough.

your boy barely looked at you.

and you weren't sure if it was in part because of the way you acted. . the way you looked. maybe he was so out of your league that he'd completely removed you from his radar.

you'd watch him from across hallways and excitement would swell in your chest when you found that you'd be walking in opposite directions.

you'd see him coming.

he'd see you.

time would slow as you walked past him.

your heart rate would pick up.

but his eyes would remain forward and time would pick back up again as soon as you were past each other.

all it'd leave you with was the bitter taste of rejection in your mouth and a deep ache of anxiety bubbling in your stomach.

the only thing that sobered you up were the dizzying possibilities.

he hadn't seen you. he hadn't noticed the effort you'd put in.

but eventually, he would.

you don't know what it was that grabbed his attention.

mark was vehemently against introducing you two.

you were at a loss until you realized that you'd just have to try harder.

whenever mark left for the bathroom, you'd made it a mission to swipe mark's phone during study sessions. you'd go through his socials and send yourself screenshots of both his follower count and who he was following.

it was a long tedious progress but eventually, you'd found your boy's account.

thankfully, it was public. which meant the the decoy accounts you'd made to snoop just in case he was private turned out to be a waste of time.

you looked through his followers and did your homework on anyone he showed a particular interest in. you'd even made a list of the usernames of the people who’s posts he interacted with the most.

and soon you became a master of disguise.

you studied them top to bottom.

those that went to the same school were far easier to emulate.

you copied their mannerisms, the way they styled their hair, you changed the cadence of your voice, the way you rolled your r’s. your clothing grew tighter and your slouch was now an exaggerated upbeat gallop as you chased after the object your new affection, hoping one day he'd notice.

. . and the exact moment he looked into your eyes and did a double take. . you did one, too.

it was completely out of surprise before you caught yourself and continued to saunter away from him with butterflies in your stomach: flapping their wings so violently it felt like you'd be swept away.

his attention was the most excitement you'd felt. . in a long time.

and you knew you'd do anything to retain it.

it was a sickly sweet feeling: syrupy, sticky. clogging your vascular system to the point your head swelled. the lack of oxygen only heightened your fantasies.

the attention was addictive and so, so good you found yourself chasing that high all the time. going to extreme lengths to get his attention. even if they’d end up embarrassing you after.

you never allowed yourself to wallow in the feeling of dread that settled in your stomach when you did everything in your power to get his attention, though.

specially whenever it made a smile stretch across his face.

whatever you did faded into the background.

it was all worth it in the end.

something was wrong with mark.

and he needed to get to the root of the problem fast.

he was looking at you. . differently.

he talked to his dad.

nolan had said something about the changing moods having to do with his powers. how being intense and passionate was just in his blood.

he talked to his mom about it. albeit in a more discrete way. he'd never be able to live it down if she'd found out you were making him behave a certain way.

she'd just chalked it up to it being puberty.

mark didn't know who to believe.

he just wanted to stop thinking about you.

his nerves were shot to shit whenever you were near.

senses heightened: you were a fog blanketing his brain until your voice carried with it a technicolor vision.

he could smell you coming like a damn blood hound.

he could hear your pulse while sitting next to you.

something was wrong with mark.

he knew it when his teeth ached when you'd stretched your neck: raised your arms over your head and let out a little sound of pain and discomfort.

something was wrong with mark.

when the day's turned warm and wet. . and your clothing became more revealing.

he could see more of you.

freckles and moles, blemishes and scars, he hadn't noticed before.

he'd follow sweat drops rolling down your skin.

smooth. soft.

he'd held you, once.

when was the last time?

something was wrong with mark.

he'd lay awake at night staring up at the ceiling.

thinking about how you'd looked while you concentrated on a book. while you looked down at your phone. while you listened to music: smiling when a song you liked came on.

your little humming. . but not singing.

never singing.

mark noticed you'd stopped singing in front of him when he started to make fun of you for it.

that, too, was how mark knew something was wrong with him.

the way your moods would shift like tides under a crescent moon whenever he'd said something excited him. he felt pleasure - a violent zap of electricity shooting up and down his spice - watching your eyes light up or darken when he'd say something to you.

about you.

i like your hair today.

light.

you talk so goddamn much.

dark.

i missed you.

light.

your stories take fucking forever.

dark.

something was wrong with him when he found his own mood depended on fantasizing on how he'd make you feel that day.

if he was in a bad mood, seeing you in one, too, was a sure-fire way to make his day a whole lot better.

something was wrong with mark.

when he'd have to smother the sounds he made while imagining you -

something was wrong with him. . when red, hot anger consumed him when one of his friends made a smart quip about your body.

when he couldn't just laugh it off anymore.

something was wrong with mark.

. . or so he thought.

because he'd later find out. .

. . no.

something was wrong with you.

all of a sudden: mark was the one double texting.

triple texting.

mark was the one asking if he could hang out. . and when the fuck did he ever need permission?

mark was the one seeking you out.

something was wrong with you.

and he needed to get to root of the problem.

he picked his brain apart in an attempt to figure out what it was. you couldn't be under any stress. you looked fine. better than fine.

you looked happy.

fucking elated.

to the point where mark couldn't affect your moods anymore.

mark wanted to know what the fuck you were so happy about.

why the fuck you were so happy when he was falling apart at the seams. when his world was crashing down.

and there you were, completely fucking oblivious.

mark had always been curious.

and so, he went to see you.

the two of you were in your room.

you'd excused yourself to go to the bathroom.

and mark started looking.

you were predictable.

he knew where you kept your journal. despite how many times he'd found it and read it aloud - holding it above his head whenever you tried to snatch it away - he'd always managed to figure out your next hiding place.

it was easier that way.

he pretended he didn't know where it was.

you pretended to have some privacy.

he pretended not to know every single, minute, insignificant detail of your life.

of your thoughts.

thank fuck you were still so naive.

thank fuck for dairies.

he'd found it in a box under your bed.

and after flipping to the page with the freshest set of ink. . he'd found out what your problem was.

you'd found a boy who'd made your heart go

thump.

thump.

thump.

#mark grayson #mark grayson x reader #invincible #invincible x reader #yandere mark grayson #yandere mark grayson x reader #:))) #im going through a lil bit of crush rn myself #lil bit #little #small #tiny #so #you know it's unhinged #AND HIS NAME IS MARK TOO LMAOOOOO #anyway mark figures out he likes you #but like every teenage boy #he makes it your problem #he's gonna [REDACTED] that boy #loosely edited we die like men

[prettyboykatsuki]

would you be comfortable sharing your bg3 ocs with us? i LOVE hearing and seeing other peoples ocs so much it inspires me to make them too

u always write reader personalities so amazing so ik ur ocs are just as good <3

WAH. YES. THANK U FOR ASKING. a lot of my ocs start out as fun self-inserts and then become... Something else. for bg3 in particular i normally play as my insert so they have the same face HEKJSDKJ. but they are ocs and they look diff in my brain i just dont care to change the face

oh my good GOD this is so long im so sorry. i guess this is my intro post for them now.thank u for asking me.. i love you... humbly presenting my little guys

CW FOR IMPLICATIONS OF INCEST (?) sort of in nyx's story. its complicated!! other than that just canon typical angst + drug use.

i have two main charas i consider more oc than insert. THE FIRST ONE IS MY BELOVED DARLING GIRLTHING SOULIKHA

goes by soul in camp, mid/late twenties, she/they pronoun haver, true neutral alignment, istj + 5w4

motifs ; black oleander, darkness and shadow, bones but not blood / decay, teals and purples and blues.

close with marisol, lae'zel and wyll. thinks astarion is a little sad and gets annoyed at mystra trying to demand death of gale.

she is a cleric of kelemvor and sacrificial survivor of a myrkul death cult. she escaped nearly dying at the age of 7 bc kelemvor saved her from near death.

she is not from baldurs gate!! she is from the outskirts of omorath but after escaping she lives on the streets.

the second time kelemvor comes to get her (nearly died in an alley) she becomes a cleric and returns to the city. joins the tower of skulls in omorath and does most of her work taking care of the diseased and guiding people in the fugue plane.

a Doomguide and part of a doom clergy.

she is originally darker skinned / tan but turns grey using her powers. when she blushes she becomes her original color lol

she ends up closer to baldurs gate on pilgrimage. she meets marisol (lambs oc) her best friend there.

she is a cleric of kelemvor, the god or judge of death. she tends to wear like a plague doctor sort of uniform and is very attached to a necklace she has that she prays over!! in general she prefers to be covered because she normally is response for helping the diseased as well as the deceased.

always wearing gloves for the same reason ^ special gloves that she has with her even after the kidnapping on the ship.

her personality is very blunt 😭and straightforward but never mean. she is just super direct and a little clueless about social cues... VERY HONEST LOL.

her main story arc is around her parents! like i mentioned she is a cleric of kelemvor but she spent her childhood in a death cult. in act one she hears rumor of a tiefling couple who worshipped myrkul being seen kidnapped on the towers to moonrise. in act two, her major scene, you have the choice on whether or not to kill or rescue her parents.

soulikha as a character puts her duty as a cleric above all else, even herself. she never expresses her feelings, never complains, just does as she believes is of expected to her. it gives her identity. up until this point, it's very rare to see her break down. this is the first scene where she makes a decision for herself

she also believes part of her job is assuring the people suffering die with the dignity and honor they deserve. part of this is because of her upbringing.

she also believes admantly in people dying when they are supposed to. as a cleric of kelemvor with particular favor of her god, she can hear whispers and regrets of death. the shadowfell lands are hard on her.

her main romance partner is karlach

her main romance with karlach has to do with touch and intimacy.

soulikha normally has her face covered and her body so if she were an origin and romance companion chara they'd be surrounding them but in her story she is dating karlach

karlach is soulikhas first love. they are tragic to me. soulikha is constantly telling karlach it's not her time and they often talk about death. she has a line to karlach:

"i will be there. when your soul burns brightest in the fugue plane, i will lead you. till the end of your life and in mine. my hand will find you. you will know its me."

she is shorter than karlach a bit. their whole romance is soulikha saying over and over that she knows karlach is bound to die, and comforting her through that.

but after the actual end of the game, soulikha cries for the very first time and begs karlach to live. it's the first time she ever says the words "i want you to live.) very heartbreaking

their ending is opening. ultimately soulikha wants to stay with karlach. they promise each other to live. the ending varies depending on other stuff but YEAH.

her bad ending is letting herself become myrkuls new chosen so karlach can have her heart back. fucking AWFUL ending gkdjsd theyre so sad.

OKAY. NEXT. IS MY OC NYX SORRY ABOUT THIS MOUTAIN OF TEXT.

this is nyx! no last name, he/him pronouns preferred, any fine. neutral evil allignment, late twenties. entp + 7w8

close with astarion + minthara. fond of jaehira. thinks wyll is fun and likes karlach. neutral to shadowheart and halsin.

nyx is not from baldurs gate either, explicitly from the city of calimshan, in manshaka. son of a common whore, born in a pleasure house.

tiefling with the blood graz'zt. this is relevant later. fdkjsdk.

learns music from the musicians in the pleasure house. naturally gifted. starts composing his own music at ten when one of this mothers regular customers gifts him a cli' lyre, enchanted with magic

has a complicated relationship with his mother. his mother is a prostitute but also very addicted to drugs. she wasn't motherly and often made advances on him when he grew up into puberty. his only family. when she was coming down the high, he would play her music to fall asleep.

practiced a lot on his own, other musicians taught him other instruments. very talented. most of his music and songs were about his one true love, roxana

roxana was another child of the house. they grew up together. she wasn't particularly talented but she was soft, kind, and beautiful. they both knew she would end up staying in the house, but nyx did try to protect her from customers when they were both underage.

roxana is full blooded human. she has a tattoo of roses down her spine that nyx dedicated one of his songs too and got matching trellis tattoos for. his most popular song.

his composition reached far and wide and he was offered many times to leave the pleasure house to perform. but he loved roxana and she often begged to say with him - so he never went. for her he'd do pretty much anything.

spent most of their lives together as lovers. first kiss at 13, lost their virginity to each other at 16/17, when they are in their early 20's nyx saves up to propose.

nyx is betrayed by roxana, though nyx by default does not care if Rrxana were to take lovers. 

because of nyx’s upbringing and roxana’s work, all nyx had ever asked Roxana for was to keep no secrets between them 

(growing up, roxana was naturally meek and often was in dangerous situations. Both because of this and because of his mothers commentary after she’d invited him for sex (“let’s keep this a secret between us,”). nyx had asked Roxana to never keep things from him, if she could.) 

roxana ultimately chooses another man over nyx, one she’d kept a secret. she’d told nyx that she couldn’t be with him anymore. That she wanted more from life, and that she would go with her new lover to see greater sights. 

“I loved her. Beautiful like a rosebed. I was a fool, of course. Only a fool forgets that the first rule to pick roses is dethorning them, lest they make you bleed.”

nyx sets off for college the same night. packs his belongings, says by to the pleasure house. his mother kisses on the cheek. he doesn't tell roxana about this

after that he commits to a life of debauchery at the college of swords. many flings and makes more music but never gets tied down despite peoples offers and efforts.

very charismatic in general and good at behaving in slimy and manipulative ways fhfksd. acts in self-interest.

very weak to soft and gentle women (hung up on his ex.... rip)

never ever mentions roxana by name even as an origin character. a lot of his story is about getting him to open up. he has a confrontation with his ex in act 3. his story is similar to astarion

in act one he hears rumor of a beautiful prostitute in the city who works the cities leaders and follows this. his main decision is meeting roxana again and deciding whether or not to forgive or save her

(you learn through the course of his story that roxana was never particularly good or honest to him, though it's not easy to figure out. the best ending to for him to save her but not take her back, the worst is dying for he)

his primary love interest is lae'zel !!

they have a silly and funny relationship at first. it starts as a sex thing but their tent is next to each other. lae'zel likes calling him a jester but loves his voice too.

he likes that she's very different from the women he dates. she's very harsh towards him but he also trusts she would never lie to him. he comforts her through the situation with vlaaktih and she in his story helps him realize that not everyone is out to betray him. he wants to love her and does.

he is SO affectionate towards her act three. she is constantly pissed she has romantic feelings for local emo clown

lae'zel having no propensity for manipulation and also being very honest is really refreshing for nyx. they have a minor age gap fdkfskjd

at the end of the story - nyx encourages lae'zel to travel and save their people. he makes a life for them in the city and writes hundreds of songs about her in her absence. they raise a gith child together

I HAVE MORE TO SAY BUT THIS IS PAINFULLY LONG. SHOWS YOU THIS ANDRUNS AWAY. PLEASE ASK ME QUESITONS IF U LIKE I LOVE ANSWERING Q'S FOR THEM. THANK U

#return to sender #oc: nyx #oc: soulikha #incest mention #KIND OF ITS COMPLIATED!!! BUT SAFETYT

[metanarrates]

cw: grooming, incest

if I DIDN'T know that rue and mytho are the endgame romantic couple, I would have thought that these last few episodes were doing an unexpectedly excellent job at setting rue up to realize that she doesn't have genuine romantic feelings for mytho. it's established that she, as a literal toddler, latched onto him, an eternal teenager, because he protected her and treated her with kindness. part of her identity - the name rue! - was established because she wanted him to continue being kind to her. and her abusive father reinforced all her life to her that the ONLY way she could maintain the kindness and attention of this person was to be in a romantic relationship with him.

now, this isn't mytho's fault. he's a victim of this too! but this is literally grooming. an adult parent continually telling a literal toddler that the only way she can continue to be friends with a much older boy is to possess him in a romantic sense? that's grooming! it's fucked up!

and combine that with the uncomfortable incest undertones happening with raven's blood mytho. we don't know what raven's blood mytho is supposed to be. the show suggests that he's a corruption of mytho, but it's not made very clear. in some ways he seems like a puppet of the raven's will. and it's a very uncomfortable parallel drawn between the way he treats rue, who is somewhat romantically entangled with him, and the way that the raven treats her. they view her almost the exact same. he acts towards her the same way her father does. I wouldn't say it comes off as outright incestuous but... it's got fucked up implications.

now, obviously, raven's blood mytho is not the real mytho. the show doesn't treat him as such. but all these story beats being set up contribute to one continual idea - that the dynamic between mytho and rue has been poisoned by the raven. from the very start, it was only ever rue grasping onto the ideas her father fed her about love. there IS a core there, perhaps, about mytho's genuine kindness towards her, and how maybe that could be used to foster a connection between them, but the romantic element of their relationship has never been good for either party. a romance between them could only ever be an expression of the cycle of abuse rue has been subjected to and perpetuates onto mytho.

so uh. it fucking sucks that her romantic feelings are treated as Genuine and Pure actually! i wanted her cathartic moment to be admitting "I don't love you, but I'm sorry I hurt you and I want us both to be free!" I wanted her moment to be one where she came into her own agency and started respecting mytho's agency as well! why does the show wish for this to be romantic! it's horrible for both parties!

#narrates #ptutu #THEY'RE VICTIMS! THIS FUCKING SUCKS!

[yuripoll]

KNOCKOUTS: Boyish² (2022)

NOTE: This was a rejected submission, on the basis that a couple of stories didn't sit right with me and it didn't feel right to stick it in the competition proper.

Boyish² is a single volume yuri anthology compiled by Natsuo Mutsumi centred on butch4butch relationships.

10 of Japan's top yuri manga artists have gathered to create the ultimate butch x butch yuri manga anthology! - Kickstarter

You can find both the JP and ENG release on the author's linktree.

CWs under the cut, sorted chapter-to-chapter. General severity rating: mild to moderate.

Locusta in the Skyscraper: nothing major.

Beware the Wolf: nothing major.

Can't Catch You Offguard With Love: nothing major.

Yuriran!: nothing major, but it's really pushing the 'butch4butch' premise. the butchest girl twitter can handle before they get scared etc etc.

We're Just Close, Is All: nothing major.

Moon in the Water: mention of suicidality + very mild sexual reference.

Portrayal: some sexual reference.

La Coneja Blanca Y Su Santa Maria: nothing explicit, but implied sex where the consent feels mildly dubious.

Seafoam: terminal illness, discussion of cannibalism, death.

All-Inclusive Feelings: not super explicit but heavy sexual reference + some sexual content. there is a brief implication-slash-mention of csa/incest (it is a miscommunication joke - nothing actually happened). and like. there's no good way to say it but it just gives me a Weird Vibe. i can't fully place it but it just raises some invisible red flag for me. the way the author depicts brown women felt... kind of fetishistic to me? additional pieces on the artist's twitter gave me the same vibe. i'm white, so feel free to ignore my take on this, but recommending the anthology without giving a clear warning about this gave me a bad taste in my mouth.

Bad Butch Bad Boy: non consensual public spanking, forced kissing & bad bdsm practices.

Coffee Time: nothing major. LI is a black woman w afro-textured hair btw! ^_^

I'll Sculpt My Abs!!: suggestive scenes.

#'rejected submission' submitted by me. i thought of it and put it on my googlesheets and then said hmmm no. #knockouts #when i say weird vibe theres nothing concrete in the oneshot but after browsing the authors twitter a while #i CAN say for sure that sometimes the characters look. uncomfortably young. #take it how you will. its one chapter in a mostly solid anthology.

[inktog]

Ants, Eyes, Butterflies, and the Hole in Marcy’s Heart

[CW: child sex abuse, rape, incest, body dysphoria, Christianity, transphobic hate crimes]

Ever since True Colors aired, I’ve wondered at the sexual implications of Andrias skewering Marcy with his flaming blade. Sometimes a sword is just a sword, I know. Sometimes a large man ramming his gigantic sword through an adolescent girl in a way that draws attention to how small and vulnerable she is by comparison, is just a large man ramming his gigantic sword through an adolescent girl in a way that draws attention to how small and vulnerable she is by comparison (220).

But the sexual violence imagery kept piling up—especially in the Core’s possession of Marcy (307b).

As this anon points out, Andrias puts a person inside of Marcy (307b): symbolic impregnation, foreshadowed by the fertilization imagery that precedes her impalement (220, above). The binary data that floods her body, ganking her physical autonomy (307b), is akin to a swarm of gametes, the “DNA” of the Core—which is itself both impregnator and, as a disembodied robot head, the child.

Compounding the impregnation imagery is the facehugger-like claw that snatches Marcy from the safety of Olivia and Yunan (307b). This might seem like a stretch, but Alien’s facehuggers are referenced more overtly in Marcy’s debut episode (206), so the callback seems noteworthy.

Finally, the Core keeps Marcy’s consciousness “locked in a little room” while piloting her body (314b). This strikes an eerie parallel to Apothegary’s spores, which make Sprig feel like “a prisoner in my own body” (119a) and which symbolize sexual abuse.

The big question is: Why does Marcy live out an extended rape metaphor within the dreamscape of Amphibia? Let’s start with the most obvious explanation.

Answer #1: Marcy was sexually assaulted and impregnated sometime before leaving Earth. Her impalement and possession is a reenactment of that trauma. If Andrias is a mythic stand-in for Marcy’s father, then her dad is the likely perpetrator.

I think it’s important to sit with this reading and not dismiss it out of hand for being too upsetting. Amphibia is a coming-of-age story, and sexual violence is, horribly, a part of many people’s childhoods. Young teen girls are assaulted more often than any other age-gender demographic. About half of child sex abuse is committed by family members.

That Marcy willingly returns to her parents is a strike against this idea, or at least against her dad being the rapist—although it’s not out of the question that Marcy would choose a known evil over fear of the unknown after all the horrors she experienced in Amphibia.

But in any case, it’s not the only explanation.

Ants vs. Newts

Mind-body dualism is a recurring theme for Marcy. The Shadow Fish are incorporeal ghosts, defeated only once they become flesh and blood (210a). Triple B declare themselves “analysts” as they scoff at “field work” (206). Decapitation, a literal separation between head and body, shows up three times in conjunction with Marcy: the ant head presented to Olivia (206), the Toadstool clock tower (215a), and Fleafy (216b). The Core alienates Marcy’s brain from her own flesh (314b). And way back in her debut episode, Newtopia is a paragon of intellectualism and culture, while the invading barbariants are driven by animal instinct (206).

The barbariant-newt conflict is also gendered. The ants have a queen with no king; Newtopia, a king with no queen (206). They are earthly, bodily, mortal, female; we are enlightened, disembodied, our rulers immortal (307b, 314b), our king male. They procreate and die; we preserve and persist.

So when the ants threaten to “turn Newtopia into a giant anthill” (206), the fear is not just body overwhelming mind, but also female displacing male. Accordingly, the anthill evokes a uterus (given the focus on queen-as-mother) and breasts (a mound of female earth). This is firmly Marcy’s episode, Marcy’s mission, Marcy’s triumph—and Marcy’s body dysphoria.

He witnesses his own reflection, and it is horror: a jump scare that causes him to recoil in fear (210a). Apparently, Marcy doesn’t like looking at himself. I count this as another point for body dysphoria, backed up by the fact that he alone doesn’t keep his copy of the trio’s photo.

Marcy, like a Shadow Fish, fears the mirror because it embodies them—makes the fact of their female flesh undeniable. (Or, well, “female.” I’m sacrificing perfectly trans-inclusive terminology for the sake of clear communication, with the justification that Marcy’s unconscious also seems to conflate sex and gender.) The butterfly which distorts their visage signifies metamorphosis, change—puberty.[1]

The recurring rift between mind and body is symbolic of Marcy’s tendency to get “in the zone”: to shut out her physical surroundings and focus with single-minded determination on a puzzle, game, or some other mental task (206, 214). This is plausibly the result of an innate neurodivergence; autism and ADHD are common headcanons. But dysphoria provides an alternate, or at least supplementary, explanation: Marcy’s body is the unbearable reality from which she escapes to her head.

Answer #2: For some trans folks, the mere existence of unwanted sex characteristics feels like a violation on par with rape. The extended sexual violence metaphor of Andrias and the Core—the betrayal, the loss of autonomy, the abject horror—communicates Marcy’s relationship to his own body as puberty takes its hold.

The Penetrating Gaze

Marcy’s psyche spawns monsters with prominent, leering eyes: the Core (307a) and the Shadow Fish (210a). This could just be a symptom of Marcy’s social anxiety, their “trouble looking people in the eye” (207a). But given the sexual symbolism already present in the Core’s treatment of Marcy, I’m inclined to view it as a kind of ogling.

Andrias’ sword is part of a Biblical allusion that we’ll dig into later. For now, just note that “a flaming sword turned every way” (Genesis 3:24) evokes the omnipresent, red-orange glare of the Core, and thus conflates the act of looking with the act of assaulting.

During the mirror jump scare, Marcy’s gaping, toothy maw is a callback to “bad boy” Branson, whose open trap (210a) is both lepidopteran and yonic.[2] Through the plant, butterfly with teeth becomes synonymous with vagina dentata, a fantastical defense against rape. For Marcy, then, puberty is a time to throw up defenses against the possibility of sexual violence.

Answer #3: The leering gaze which haunts Marcy represents unwanted sexual attention from peers or adults directed at her maturing body. Rape and pregnancy are not reenacted traumas, but unrealized fears: the horrifying endgame of all this attention.

Between Anne and Sasha’s dueling and Andrias’ flame blade, swords are sexualized. Marcy is the only one of the trio who doesn’t wield a sword, a possible hint that he’s ace.

Answer #3a: Marcy’s discomfort with sexual attention is compounded by their asexuality.

A popular interpretation of the prom poster and Sashanne fusion (Amphibia 307b) is that Marcy is attracted to both of her friends; she’s afraid that they’ll start dating each other and that she’ll be left behind. After being confronted with this nightmare, Marcy becomes the leering eyes, villain of her own story (307b). Even earlier, Marcy’s fear of her own reflection likens her to the other set of oglers, the Shadow Fish (210a).

Perhaps Marcy fears the power of his own gaze—thinks he’s hurting Sasha and Anne just by looking at them, wanting them. And perhaps the fiery phallus (220) belongs not just to Marcy’s rapist, but simultaneously to Marcy himself, sprouting unwanted from his heart, which will soon bear one of a set of red eyes (307b).

Answer #1a: As a result of an assault, Marcy was forcibly given sexual knowledge beyond their years, which colored their perception of both Anne and Sasha. Marcy has a lot of shame attached to the assault and to their own experience of sexual attraction.

Answer #1b: Marcy believes her assault to be the source of her transmasculinity.

Back to Paradise

Marcy thinks he and his friends can keep adventuring “forever and ever” and “never have to grow apart” (220). Perhaps Andrias hinted earlier (off-screen) at his ability to cheat death, or perhaps Marcy just assumes that he’ll find the secret to immortality somewhere in the great wide multiverse. Either way, Marcy does not want to die.

The phrase never grow also implies not growing up. We’ve already discussed Marcy’s fear of puberty, which they might associate with unwanted sexual attention, sexual trauma, or dysphoria-inducing body traits.

The dual anxieties of mortality and puberty are united in the image of the butterfly, which symbolizes not only metamorphosis and change, but also (as any post–season 2 Amphibia theorist would tell you) death; and in the barbariants, who play not only the queen to Newtopia’s king, but also the fleeting individual lifespan to its timeless immortality. Female flesh, mortal flesh—for Marcy, it’s one and the same.

This duality is reflected in the Biblical story of original sin. For those unfamiliar with the myth: After God creates the universe, he makes two humans, Adam and Eve, and gives them free reign of the bountiful Garden of Eden (Genesis 2). The humans are allowed to eat from any tree in the garden (2:16), except the tree of the knowledge of good and evil (2:17). A malicious serpent tempts Eve to disobey this rule (3:1–6), who in turn tempts Adam (3:6). The humans previously existed in a state of childlike sexual innocence, “not ashamed” of their nakedness (2:25)—but after eating the forbidden fruit, they become able to conceptualize evil and shame, and they cover their naked bodies (3:7). For their disobedience, God casts them out of Eden (3:23).

The show alludes to this passage rather strongly with its inciting incident—Anne is tempted to disobedience and theft, with the music box functioning as the forbidden fruit, and then the friends are cast from the only world they’ve ever known: literally Earth, but also childhood, symbolized by the gated playground from which they depart (Amphibia 101b), and on Anne’s thirteenth birthday (120) no less, a cultural milestone for the start of adolescence—so I’m comfortable mining it for further analysis.

The myth shares with Marcy’s dreamscape a tight connection between sexual maturity and death. In forbidding the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, God cautions that “in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die” (Genesis 2:17). He makes good on this promise after they disobey, cursing them with a mortal life full of struggle and strife: “In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return” (3:19). God exiles humans from Eden to make sure they stay mortal, for within the garden is a tree whose fruit grants immortality (3:22–23), and if the humans ate that, it would completely undo the whole dust unto dust punishment.

Marcy has a particular, peculiar concept of immortality: she wants to escape death by returning to a state of perpetual physical childhood. This helps to explain many of the seemingly arbitrary infant symbols which coalesce around her—zombies are babies because they defy the natural cycle of life and death; disembodied heads are babies because Marcy wants to decouple physical growth from mental growth, freeing her consciousness from the baggage of an aging, growing, sexual(ized) body; robots are babies because of her transhumanist aspirations—as well as Marcy’s affinity for those symbols, especially plants (210a, 215b, 216b) and robots (215b, 216a).[3] Deathless childhood is loosely synonymous with transmasculinity, and in particular medical transition, since sexless is loosely synonymous with male under the male = mind, female = body schema.

God leaves a flaming sword to guard Eden against the humans’ return (Genesis 3:24). Remember that Earth is the Eden from which the trio have been cast. Marcy tries to go back (Amphibia 220), symbolically signaling a desire for immortality—i.e., medical transition—and Andrias impales him with a flaming sword (220).

Answer #1d: Marcy is a victim of homophobic rape—sometimes called “corrective” rape—assault motivated by a desire to “fix” their non-normative gender identity.

Conclusion

Well, that was a lot. In lieu of a single overarching thesis, I hope this post serves as a more up-to-date record of how I’ve been thinking about the sexual violence metaphor built into Marcy’s character arc.

Some of the explanations I provided are mutually exclusive, but most of them aren’t. Marcy could be trans and a survivor of assault and generally uncomfortable with sexual attention and guilty about desiring Anne and Sasha. Or any combination thereof. Maybe she’s dealt with rape threats but hasn’t been assaulted. Maybe she was actually raped, but pregnancy is an unrealized fear. Or I’m wrong about everything.

In any case, there’s a lot that’s left unstated, a lot to be unpacked, and a lot that I’m probably missing. Further lines of inquiry that I’d like to pursue include:

Darcy as a twisted wish fulfillment of Marcy’s immortality fantasy: body no longer maturing (per the axolotl helmet), mind uploaded to the Core.

The justification for patriarchy written into the myth of original sin.

The “bad boy” comment directed at Branson in light of Marcy’s possible transmasculinity.

Marcy’s relationship to plants more generally.[3]

Heart as the severed bridge between mind (Wit) and body (Strength).

I might update this post if I turn up anything coherent.

Footnotes

[1] If Marcy’s fears are manifest in the butterfly, why is he so enthusiastic about dressing up as “the personification of metamorphosis” (219b)? Perhaps it’s the agency: choosing to roleplay as puberty and change allows Marcy to engage with those fears on his own terms, which is quite different from unexpectedly coming face-to-face with them while already anxious and scared.

[2] If it seems far-fetched to consider the Branson yonic, then contrast with Grime’s murderplant in 120, a “she” with a big ol’ phallic tongue (below). I don’t know what this says about Sasha or Grime, but the total reversal of it in 210a—flipping the gender from female to male, and the sex from male to female—lends a sense of intentionality to Branson’s design.

[3] Plants are the only baby symbol that aren’t explained by Marcy’s immortality fantasy, yet they play an important role—the central role, arguably—in establishing Marcy’s fascination with childhood. At a first guess, maybe plants represent a kind of “natural” childhood (born of earth and water, dying like the rest of us) which might not fit Marcy’s fantasy but with which they’re nonetheless fascinated? Anyway.

—

Credit to an anonymous AO3 commenter for the observation that Andrias' flaming sword might be a Biblical reference.

Amphibia citations are SEE, where S is season number and EE is episode number. a and b denote each episode’s first and second segments, respectively.

Biblical quotes are from the King James Version.

#amphibia #marcy wu #meta #mine #nsfpc #i guess it was just a two-day break

[windingcorridor]

Manhunt is a life-changer, the kind of book that shifts your insides around and makes room for itself. I finished it at 3am last night, and have been wandering around the house since. I feel hollowed out. I want to- need to- read it again. Christ.

This book has a ton of Content Warnings, some stemming from genre, most stemming from its premise and perspective. CW: transphobia, dead-naming, cannibalism, dysphoria, rape, implied incest, fatphobia, public execution, slavery, torture, body horror.

Disclaimer: I'm writing this review from my perspective as a man exploring their gender, folding in They/ Them pronouns with my He/ Him. While I have considered in myself whether or not I am a woman, I don't think I am. Do with that info what you will.

I found Manhunt on a recommendation shelf at my local bookstore- shout out to Eagle Eye Books in Decatur, GA- and its cover grabbed me instantly. It's a shocking image, blunt in its implication and color. It's a fitting one, too, echoing the words inside. You're going to get grabbed and the story isn't going to let go until the last.

You can get a synopsis for the thing anywhere, so no need here. Just know that Fran & Beth's story starts with the punchline- "What if being a man turned you into a rage zombie?"- and runs red with it. Being a trans woman is already goddam hard in the real world- now imagine people looking at you the same way people in zombie movies look at people who have been bit. It's a fantastic grounding device, with Felker-Martin using it as a jumping off point to point out how fucked transphobia can get.

Speaking of rage, this book is so full of anger and hatred, righteous and otherwise. It smacks you, not just inside the content but with its construction. Felker-Martin hates transphobes, trustfund child-adults, people who will put a hashtag on their twitter profile but never do anything. She never writes this out explicitly, but the way th`e story is told? Buddy, she makes that very clear.

The characters are deliciously complex. You start with easy sketches- the pretty one, the strong one, the fat one, the TERF, the trans man, etc- but you hop from perspective to perspective often enough that things begin to mold into a rich picture.

(If I have any criticism of the book at all, it's that, occasionally, we shift perspective so fast and often that timelines can get wobbly. I'll think it's only been a few hours in-story, but then a character will mention it's been a few weeks. It course corrects cleanly, though, and never became too much of an issue.)

One of the perspective characters- Ramona- is a part of The Legion, militarized TERFs who have taken over huge swaths of the US in name of eradicating "men wearing womanface." Thing is, Ramona has a thing for trans women. By day, she's an XX chromosome tattoo wearing Nazi, by night she's sleeping with a trans lover in a secret brothel. She hates her hypocrisy (so many of the characters ooze self-hatred), but she is so caught up in the fervor of her movement that she can't slow down.

These contradictions cover the whole cast. At times, I hated them. Others, I loved them. By the end, all I wanted to do is spend more time with them.

It's here I want to say- I love you, Beth. It's obvious that the author loves you, too. Not in the "here's-some-plot-armor" way, the book isn't cheap like that. The author writes Beth and all of the other trans characters with so much empathy, personal history, and heart, it's difficult not to see them as breathing, beautiful people.

When you have a book like this- one that moves at so much force- you worry that there isn't a way in hell that it will stick the ending. Happy to report that as much of a power-drill the last act is, I left the book satisfied. I, alone in my living room, warm forgotten beer on the coffee table, wife and daughter asleep in the next room, muttered, "Whoa," when I read the last paragraph.

So, yeah. Read Manhunt. It isn't for everyone. The best art never is. But if you allow yourself to be taken by it, hold on.

Nick <3

#books #book review #horror #gender #transgender #manhunt #gretchen felker martin

[hollowwhisperings]

The Real Housewives of Westeros: Wives & Widows Frey

I saw the Joke and Ran With It. Most of these women exist as Names Only, few having much in the way of Personal Biography. I have "Made Do", when plausible, by connecting them to Each Other &/or to Better Known Characters. As their ages are generally Not Given (or are of Ridiculous Range), feel free to HC them as the Reality TV Stars of Your Choosing: my knowledge of such shows ends with their having Fun Titles & Dubious Authenticity.

CW: spoilers on canoical character deaths (TWoW excerpts included), reference to the Red Wedding ("RW"), implications of infidelity (& thus in-setting slutshaming), mentions of canonical cousin-incest (& occasional debunkings thereof), casual speculation on Theories of Varying Degrees of Crackiness (largely shoved into As Yet Unposted "Footnote" Posts but I may have Missed Some).

The (As Yet Unwidowed) Housewives of House Frey

• Lady Joyeuce Erenford of the Crossing, b. 282/283 AC (17). The 8th & current wife of Lord Walder Frey (92). Pregnant, allegedly by "Black" Walder (a great-grandson of her husband). Expectant Widow.

• Janyce Hunter, wife of Edwyn Frey (Heir Apparent of Lord Walder Frey). Mother of Walda (9~10, 2nd in line to inherit The Twins). Expectant Widow & Prospective Bride of "Black" Walder Frey (...assuming he doesn't claim his Nieces as his bastards, delegitimizing them all). Of unknown relation to the current Lord Hunter of Longbow Hall (while a Rosby-Frey does serve as that Castle's Maester, Janyce married into the Royce-Freys).

• Deana Hardyng, wife of Walton Frey (a character in Name-Only). Mother of Steffon "the Sweet" (20~40), "Fair" Walda (19/20) & Bryan (9~19, a squire). Of unknown relation to Ser Harrold Hardyng, likely an aunt or cousin.

• Lady Genna Lannister of Riverrun (55), wife of Lord Emmon Frey (RW participant). Only sister of the late Lord Tywin Lannister & a maternal figure to his 3 children. Mother of Ser Cleos (killed pre-RW), Ser Lyonel (27~32, likely RW participant), Tion (murdered pre-RW) & "Red" Walder (15, a page at Casterly Rock). Goodsister of Perriane Frey. Expectant Widow (by her own husband, no less!).

• Melesa Crakehall, wife of Ser Lyonel Frey (likely participant in the RW). Without issue. Her husband is 3rd in line to inherit Riverrun & 15th in line to inherit The Twins. Goodsister of Jeyne Darry. Of unknown relation to Shiera Crakehall (wife of Ser Damion Lannister, the current castellan of Casterly Rock), Lord Roland of Crakehall (for whom both Merrett Frey & Ser Jaime Lannister squired in their Begrudgingly Shared Childhood) or the late Lady Amarei Crakehall (3rd wife of Lord Frey). Her husband is of the Royce-Freys (the line of Lord Walder by his 1st wife, Perra Royce), Just In Case you were Worried.

• Ryella Royce, wife of Ser Arwood Frey (a Schrodinger's RW participant). Mother of Ryella (6), twins Androw & Alyn (4) & Hostella (~1). Probably a daughter of Lord Yohn Royce & thusly the "Goodsister" of Ser Mychel Redfort. Of unknown relation to the late Perra Royce and her line of Royce-Freys. Her husband is of the Crakehall-Freys, just in case you were Worried.

• Lady Lythene Frey, wife of Lord Lucias Vypren (RW participant). Mother of Elyana (19~37) & Ser Damon (18~36). Goodsister of Bellena Hawick, Betharios of Braavos, Wynafrei Whent, Lady Mariya Darry, Carolei Waynwood & Beony Beesbury. Likely RW Conspirator.

• Elyana Vypren (19~37), wife of Ser Jon Wylde (probable RW participant). Mother of Rickard (5).

• Betharios of Braavos, wife of Symond Frey (RW participant). Mother of Alesander the Singer (19~27), Alyx (18) & Bradamer (11, ward of a Braavosi merchant). Possible spymaster. Both her husband & eldest child have Disappeared: her son from the RW, alongside Olyvar & Ser Perwyn; her husband was last seen leaving White Harbour for Barrowton on a gifted palfrey*. As ever, I have Theories (noted far below, in Footnotes): notably, to me, none of her children are named for Lord Walder (a good guide on Which Freys have Ambitions, generally speaking).

• Wynafrei Whent, wife of Ser Danwell Frey (RW participant). Without issue, to the distress of them both. Of unknown relation to the Late Ladies: Sarya (5th wife of Lord Frey, one of Danwell's step-mothers), Shella (last Lady of Harrenhal), or Minisa Whent (mother of Catelyn, Lysa & Edmure Tully). She & her husband are guests at Castle Darry.

• Lady Walda Frey of the Dreadfort, b. 283/284 AC (16). Wife of Lord Roose Bolton (key engineer of the RW & Murderer of King Robb). Pregnant & Rightfully Terrified: the latest Victim in the Winterfell Murder Mysteries was her brother, "Little" Walder Frey (9), & she's been living with Ramsay Bolton. The Safety of the pregnant Lady Bolton is Motive for the Darry-Freys to "Turncloak" on their kin or, at least, Houses Bolton & Lannister. A Certain Northern Spymaster (recent escapee of the Boltons of Winterfell), may prove "Helpful" in this regard... assuming Littlefinger or an Envoy of "Aegon Targaryen" don't beat him to it.

• Beony Beesbury, wife of Ser Raymund Frey (murderer of Lady Catelyn Tully of Winterfell). Mother of Robert (17, an acolyte of the Citadel), Malwyn (16, an apprentice alchemist in Lys), the twins Serra & Sarra (15), Cersei "Little Bee" (7), & the twins Jaime & Tywin (<1). Her having "twin" sets of twins whilst living at "The Twins" likely aided in Inspiring the Ambitions of her husband & (presumably) herself. Of unknown relation to the late Jeyne Beesbury (wife of Rhaegar Frey of the Royce-Freys) or Lord Warryn Beesbury of Honeyholt.

• Leonella Lefford, wife of "Lame" Lothar Frey (key engineer of the RW). Mother of Tysane (8), Walda (5), Emberlei (3) & Leana (~1). Of unknown relation to Lady Alysanne Lefford of Golden Tooth. Goodsister of Sallei & Sylwa Paege, of Morya & Tyta "the Maid" Frey. Her involvement in her husband's [war crimes] is Unspecified but she does have a daughter named "Walda".

• Sallei Paege, wife of Ser Jammos Frey (RW participant). Mother of "Big" Walder (9) & the twins Dickon & Mathis (6). Likely a sister of Sylwa Paege (entry below Sallei's though I suspect Sylwa is the elder of the two). Of unknown relation to Ser Halmon (last known Head of House Paege) or Ser Robert (friend of Edmure Tully) Paege.

• Sylwa Paege, wife of Ser Whalen Frey (RW participant). Mother of Hoster (13) & "Merry" Frey (12). Likely a sister of Sallei.

• Morya Frey, wife of Ser Flement Brax (RW participant). Mother of Robert (10), Walder (7) & Jon (4).

• Roslin Frey (18), wife of Edmure Tully. Traumatised Bride of The RW. Currently a Pregnant Hostage of the Lannister-Freys of Riverrun. Goodsister of the late Ladies Stark & Arryn. Part of the Conditions for Ser Jaime's success in lifting the Siege of Riverrun was the Safe Reunion of Edmure & Roslin... as hostages in Casterly Rock (after she gives birth). Known to pray for a girl (lest a son get Immediately Murdered).

• The Schrodinger's Mother of Walder Haigh, presumably the living wife of Ser Harys Haigh (RW participant). "Exists" due to Walder (5) being of Legitimate birth; does not Exist due to her lacking any indication whatsoever of being Alive (or Dead).

The (Current) Widows Frey

• Mylenda Caron, b. 258~266 AC (34~42). Widow of Petyr Frey (RW participant). Mother of Perra Frey (6), 4th in line to inherit The Twins. Prospective bride of "Black" Walder, assuming he doesn't wed her Goodsister, delegitimize both their children (& their mothers with them) or, y'know, just Kills Them All (a fear of Edwyn Frey's). Potential claimant to Nightsong, where a Ser Rolland Storm is Lord (by the decree of King Stannis, due to the deaths of his Lord Father & legitimate half-brother) though their exact relation is unknown.

• Jeyne Darry, widow of Ser Cleos Frey (killed prior to the RW). Mother of "Ty" (12, heir of Riverrun), & Willem (10, a page at Ashemark). Goodsister of Melessa Crakehall (wife of Ser Lyonel of the Royce-Freys) & the Crakehall-Freys (children of Lord Walder by the late Amarei Crakehall, her relation to Melessa being unknown) through her elder sister, Lady Mariya Darry. Resents being "displaced" in the inheritance of Castle Darry (despite her rather comfortable position as the Future Regent of Riverrun).

• Perriane Frey (50's), widow of Ser Leslyn Haigh (RW participant). Eldest daughter of Lord Walder (by the late Perra Royce). Mother of Ser Harys (17~49), Ser Donnel (16~48) & Alyn (9~47, a squire). At least 2 of her sons participated in the RW. 22nd in line for The Twins. The relation of Lord Yohn Royce to the late Perra Royce (& thus the Royce-Freys) is unspecified.

• Zhoe Blanetree, widow of Ser Tytos Frey (killed outside the RW). Mother of Zia (15) & Zachery (13, student at the Sept of Oldtown). Goodsister of Kyra Frey.

• Kyra Frey (30-40's), widow of Ser Garse Goodbrook (RW participant). Daughter of Ser Jared Frey by his cousin, the late Alys Frey. Mother of Walder (10) & Jeyne (7).

• Bellena Hawick, widow of Ser Hosteen Frey (RW participant, killed in TWoW?). Mother of Ser Arwood (18~40). Goodsister of the Crakehall-Freys. Probable guest at Castle Darry.

• Lady Mariya Darry. Widow of Merrett Frey (RW participant). Mother of "Gatehouse" Ami (18), "Fat" Walda (17), Marissa (15) & the late "Little" Walder Frey (9). She & her children are Directly Responsible for my gaining An Interest in the Intrigues of the Frey Civil War.

• Lady Amerei Frey of Castle Darry (18). Eldest daughter of Lady Mariya Darry by the late Merrett Frey (RW participant). Twice-married & newly single, whomever wins Ami's Hand in Matrimony shall have Lordship (of Castle Darry). Her Loyalties & Tracts of Land are Actually Rather Important**, plot-wise.

• Carolei Waynwood, widow of Ser Geremy Frey ("drowned"). Mother of Sandor (14, a squire) & Cynthea (9, a ward at Iron Oaks). Probably a daughter of Lady Anya Waynwood, given her children's places within Lady Waynwood's Household. Both children are in attendance for the upcoming Tourney of the Winged Brotherhood at the Gates of the Moon (held for Lord Robert Arryn by the suggestion of "Alayne Stone"). If she yet lives, Carolei is likely sheltering with her Goodsisters at Castle Darry.

• Jyana Frey, widow of her cousin Ser Benfrey Frey (RW participant). Mother of "Deaf" Della (4) & Osmund (3). Goodsister of Roslin Frey.

Footnotes (links to Elaborated Tinhattery)

*Betharios of Norvos & Frey Pies: "They Were Ahorse". [Post upcoming].

**"Gatehouse Ami" & the Gate Next Door: How Wooing Darry Could Win Conquest of Westeros. [Post upcoming].

#frey civil war #house frey #women of asoiaf #the real housewives of westeros #be a-frey'd be very a-frey'd #i saved the worst puns for the tags & upcoming spinoff crack #here's the resteros #down at darry #king of the crossing #gatehouse ami #house darry #house waynwood #house royce #house lannister #widows of westeros #there were fewer widows frey than i expected but i guess their numbers will only increase with each chapter of TWoW #succession crises of westeros #women of westeros #women of the riverlands #technically there's some mild crossover into the north & the crownlands but mostly they're in the active warzone #it's harder to find non-frey housewives of the riverlands tbh #it's basically lady smallwood and Unnamed Wives with Unnamed Daughters #then again our POV characters for the riverlands haven't exactly been hitting High Society & it HAS been an active warzone since book 1 #the riverlands #fandom resources