#just using tags i dont actually think the following things

[pettyprocrastination]

whoever this beloved anon was I am so touched by your kindness! You definitely didn’t have to do this but I am so happy you enjoy this idea and I will happily expand upon it for you!

this is just a collection of word vomit bullet points for the time being but I will happily answer any and all questions about this pair!!

warnings: violence, angst, child death (Sarah Miller), foul language, the same warnings that apply to tlou, reader is Sarah's mom and described as having similar features to her. 

So the general Idea is that you and Joel are happily married before the outbreak. 

You had been Sarah's mother, his high school sweetheart he got pregnant when neither of you were old enough to have any reaction to the pregnancy test other than a fucking panic attack in one another’s arms. but you made it work 

you both worked but made time for one another and your sweet girl, going to museums every other weekend and joel insisting on swooping you off for a date every now and then 

nothing special. He knows you’re more of a diner gal than anything too fancy that makes you both feel out of place. 

On his birthday in 2003, you had planned to tell him that you were pregnant again. But the memories of your own fears of motherhood from all those years ago begin to swirl through your head again and you get cold feel. deciding to tell him the morning after

it is his birthday afterall, you want to focus on him. 

but when you’re woken up in the middle of the night because tommy needs to get bailed out, Joel kisses you sweetly one last time before promising he’ll be back and you can’t shake the feeling that something bad is happening. 

its you that shakes sarah awake that night. shouting at her to put on her shoes when she’s still rubbing the sleep from her eyes because you’ve been listening to the radio for the past two hours, calling joel again and again and again praying for him to fucking pick up but to no avail. 

Sarah, bless your little girl’s bleeding heart is the one who insists you check on the adler’s against your better suspicions and when you find the eldest looming over her daughter, blood and sinew dripping from her mouth, you grab your daughter hand and burst into a full sprint until something slams into your back and sends you tumbling onto their front lawn

its how joel finds you, struggling to keep the once sweet old woman, whose now nothing more than dead eyes and gnashing teeth straining to snap at your pulse point as you push against her while sarah shrieks before your husband runs forward and cracks her skull with a wrench. 

there’s hardly a moment of pause, just enough for him to pull you up and into his arms before he’s ushering you both into the car with an urgency. 

when the truck crashes, you get separated from them. Perhaps at Tommy’s side when the flames rise and create a wall, separating you from your husband, or maybe pulled into the mob of chaos when trying to escape from those already infected-

all joel knows is that you promise you’ll find him: just get sarah to safety and you’ll meet him at the river

Poor thing is already so frightened, held in her father’s arms with tears streaming down her face insisting they can’t leave you they just can’t but her father kisses her forehead and reassures her its going to be okay 

“we just need to be brave, okay babygirl? Your mama’s real tough, she’s gonna be alright.” 

he isn’t sure if he’s saying it to his daughter or himself. 

but when he comes to the river you aren’t there. Only a soldier who points a gun at the scared little girl in his arms and then he loses everything

its when the light is gone from his daughter’s eyes that he realizes. His voice cracked and raw from sobbing that he looks around to see his brother with drawn in shoulders and tears in his eyes but his wife is nowhere to be found. 

Tommy says you got lost in the chaos. Everything was so loud, so sudden that he turned around and suddenly you weren’t there. 

Joel wants to go back but its Tommy that stops him, that dulls the red in his vision to a sad faded pink because his brother points at the orange horizon not too far from them, so much of the city is already in flames. 

“We’re gonna find her, but not there.” 

So Joel searches. for the first year spent in the world post-outbreak its all he did. 

He became a smuggler because of it. 

Information came at a price and he needed to be able to fucking pay it, whether it be in blood or ration cards. He was willing to do anything to find you or any thin thread that lead your way. 

But it’s Tommy that asks him to give up. Not in those words of course. 

The youngest Miller knows better than to say something so cruel that would make his brother, the only person he has in this world turn on him. 

But his voice is worried when he asks him one night in Boston when he hasn’t even had the chance to wash the blood from his knuckles 

“You think she would have wanted this for you?” 

the fight that followed his words was brutal. Vicious insults and scarred fists slamming against each brother until they're both too tired and bloody to continue. Each leaning against a wall for support and Tommy’s wavering voice breaking the silence. 

“I don’t know where she is, Joel. But I do know you're gonna get yourself killed if you keep lookin’ for her.” 

All he can do is nod. 

It’s a few days later when he meets Tess. Who has heard plenty of stories about the elder miller’s brutality and wants him to put that muscle to good use for some extra profit. 

It begins his new life. One that empty and cold but one he can live. 

Until of course, Ellie comes along. The sweet and incredibly opinionated girl that makes him become something akin to the man he thought died twenty years ago. 

its when he’s traveling with Ellie, that it happens. When a warm familiarity has settled between the two because so much blood and pain has been shared he can’t help but see her as something close, something bright even though all he can force himself to utter in her reference is “cargo” 

when theyre traveling through the woods as Ellie chatters away, probing his memory about a movie that may or may not have existed thirty years ago because her descriptions of the plot are incredibly odd he hears a voice shout for them to stop and finds himself staring at a man- no, a boy- pointing a gun at them. 

Ellie stills, but Joel can see enough to know that from the lanky figure and dimpled face that he’s young. Maybe twenty, twenty-two at the oldest, but his eyes dart from Joel to Ellie with a pinprick of fear that allows Joel the time to charge forward and slam him to the ground before wrestling the gun from his hands. 

He has enough to time to tuck it under the stranger’s chin before he hears the sound of the safety being turned off and finds himself looking up and seeing a gun just inches from his face. 

Joel’s head whips around when Ellie’s voice calls out his name in fear, he turns to see another stranger holding her a gun point, shoulders drawn back and a shadow cast over their face by the had obstructing their identity. 

“You hurt one of mine, I hurt one of yours. That a fair deal?” 

Its takes him a moment to recognize you. It’s been so long since he’s heard your voice, the sweet tease when you would poke at him each time he woke up late despite the fact that you reminded him to set his alarm the night before, the times you’d chide him with a harsh “Joel Miller!” whispered in public anytime he was able to grab you a bit too passionately to be appropriate in public but the laughter in your voice let him know you were never truly mad at him. You didn’t know how to be. 

But that sweetness is buried under a cold rasp that cuts through the air as you point a rifle at the scared little girl in front of you.

“You think I won’t?” You’re older now, skin covered in scars from a life he didn’t know you got the chance to live and your eyes are cold as they regard your husband. “Put the gun down and get the fuck off of him, I won’t repeat myself.” 

Joel mumbles your name in awe. The woman he loved, the woman he mourned the one he fought so hard to find stands before him like some sort of hallucination and suddenly the world feels like its spinning until you bark orders at him again. 

“You’ve got five seconds Joel, make a fucking choice before I make it for you.” 

He looks down and realizes the boy under him, the one with the bleeding nose and snarling face has your eyes and his dimples. 

“One.” 

The one above him has Sarah’s hair. Soft brown curls that shine under the sun. 

“Two”

Wait. No, they both do.

“Three.” 

Twins. Jesus fucking Christ you had twins. 

“Four.” 

Joel holds the rifle up above his head and the one boy standing snatches it from his grasp, tossing it to the ground and kicking it far from his reach. He slowly stands, allowing your son- dear god your son- to scramble to his feet. 

Your voice softens just for a moment. “You okay, Duke?” 

Blood stains the bottom half of his face from where Joel slammed his fist into the boy’s nose just moments before, but he nods nonetheless. 

Now, they both stand on one side of you and he can see the resemblance clear as day the same way he would whenever Sarah was by your side.

When you order him to hand over his bag, he does so without question before telling Ellie to do the same. 

She watches him with wide eyes, her hands still up in the air but gaping at her companion as if he had grown a second head. 

“Joel!” “Just do it, alright?”

He doesn’t miss the way you watch their interaction with narrowed eyes until she tosses her bag to you and you slowly lower your gun. 

“Now, you want to tell me what the fuck you think you’re doin’ at my home?” 

#joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #i had an idea of something similar for tommy but on outbreak night he uh. abandons you instead of getting separated from you #because. angst :D #people say nice things #this was incredibly generous of you anon thank you so so much! #i may get myself a little starbucks drink this week now because I havent had starbucks since like january 1st lol #joel reeling from taking in all this information and also realizing he suckerpunched HIS OWN KID #id like to apologize for all the grammatical issues with this. this is just a bulletpoint word vomit to get my thoughts on the page before- #-beginning the actual fic. also I have to do a midterm tonight and this is my treat to myself hehe #but yes. joel getting separated from his wife on outbreak night and having to accept that shes probably dead #meanwhile youve lived this entire life without him because you think HES dead ad raising your boys all on your own #which just- further digs into his insecurities about failing in his role as a protector #he couldn't save sarah. he can't save ellie and he couldn't even save you #he thinks about you pregnant and alone. fending for yourself in a world full of infected and raiders and his chest grows tight again #this is all followed by Ellie going >:O 'you KNOW THIS PSYCHO?'and then joel immediately snapping at her to WATCH HER MOUTH #because that kid has no filter and he has to explain that youre his wife #anyways joels wife is a badass mfer who also maybe has a little garden and some chickens that you and your boys take care of <3 yeah . #reunion tag #ill be using that for this specific couple because I dont have a fic title yet but if anybody has suggestions!

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

ah yes! the joys of executive dysfunction and something being Fundamentally Broken In Your Braincase!

#quick vent Look Away Nothing To See Here #i just needed to place my emotions somewhere before i really started to spiral #texts from cherished friends should not cause nausea-level anxiety! and yet! #here i am! running away from the ever-present miasma of guilt and stress! #you know a few months ago i was like 'im going to be better about responding im going to do better' #i Immediately started doing Worse! #i think i stressed myself out too much #pretty much every relationship i have ends up completely deteriorating due to my own insecurities and guilt and fucked up brain <3 #ah yes and how could i forget the Commitment Issues and Emotional Block #mentally i am banging my head into a wall #but its fine Its Fine #i mean its not. its really not. but sometimes it seems like the harder i try the harder i fail #which is something i should be used to by now! #okay so it looks like i Am Indeed spiraling so #i am going to go... list some good things in this world and uhhh #well i dont have the car this weekend so cant go for a drive and some boba. um. #i need to organize my room table Yes that sounds distracting and falsely productive #not gonna tag this with anything actually. #love treating tumblr like my personal diary #ah yes its just me. my personal feelings. and the couple thousand people that follow me. #perhaps i will also buy something online with one of the gift cards i found the other day #buttons from michaels!!! i need buttons! i will go do that! #with the knowledge that i have unopened messages to respond to looming in the back of my mind like a noose! yippee yahoo!!! #gonna... turn of replies/rbs just this once since its just a Vent #i just needed to get it Out yk? not looking for anything other than relieving pressure on my brain #ok it looks like i cant turn of replies for individual posts #just... pretend you didnt see this for both our sakes <3 #look away look away

[devondespresso]

writing my silly little fic and again im struck with how much opportunities they missed by pretending the s2 stancy breakup wasn't messy, specifically for Nancy's guilt about barb and forcing herself to grow up too fast

like s1 Nancy spends one night being a stupid teenager goofing off at her boyfriend's party and staying over to get spicy while Barb goes home. then she later realizes Barb disappeared and died that one night she was letting go and having fun. this is widely recognized trauma for her and informs a lot if not most of her actions through the rest of the show

in season 2 she's feeling the weight of it more around the first year anniversary. steve trys to help by taking her to a party to forget for a little while and 'be stupid teenagers' for a night. a perfectly set up parallel already

the way the show wants it to go, we get the bullshit argument, they fight, allegedly break up at some point, and nancy sleeps with Jonathan. later steve tells her to go with him and we're supposed to read it as Steve stepping back so jancy can happen. we're supposed to be seeing this as a happy ending.

but with the material we're given this would have been the perfect place for an emotional repeat of season 1 for nancy. she and steve go to the party and pretend to be stupid teenagers for the night. but oh no! nancy lets lose too much, lets herself relax and drink and dance, and the next day her boyfriend's pissed. hes saying she said things she never remembered saying and its hurt him and she doesn't know what to do. and kids around school are talking about them breaking up at the party, and that fits with Steve's anger she saw, so they must've broken up right? it sucks, even if she wasn't in love with him, that'd be the worst way to break up with someone (especially if she's confusing platonic and romantic feelings or convincing herself it has to be romantic when she really just values him as a friend)

and then she doesn't have time to work it out, she needs to go with Jonathan to avenge barbs 'disappearance' to give her family closure. She's got a lot of conspiracy shit to do and its stressful. so when murray starts going off about how she's not really in love with steve, how she actually likes Jonathan and he seems to like her back. they finished a lot of the hard work with the conspiracy stuff, she can let her guard down and have a quick good night.

then the next day is chaos. demodogs and labs and will being possessed. It a rough fucking day. Steve tells her to go with Jonathan while they get the mindflayer out of Will, civil like they're on good terms so she does (and thank god she did because that was rough and they needed all the help they could get)

and then everything's fine again, with the upside down. and it looks like she handled things better this time, was about to relax occasionally and still made it through.

except apparently she and steve didn't break up. he thought it was just a few fights, that they put their shit aside for the apocalypse and now they can work things out.

and it could ruin nancy. a year later and she's still hasn't learned her lesson, that letting her guard down hurts the people she cares about, that relaxing and having fun makes her lose people. its her fault for the messy breakup with Steve and its her fault that barb is gone. she's the reason she's lost friends close to her, 2 for 2, and now she only has Jonathan left (and what do you know, season 3 has her conflict with Jonathan and in season 4 she's not let anyone else get truly close to her and fred still dies)

you see what i mean?? by having conflict magical resolve itself in the background we loose so much powerful, painful character drama for her. our girl who thinks she has to keep the world around her up solely on her shoulders because she can't handle the loss of her best friend in season 1. Nancy who desperately wants to be normal and have people she loves but keeps losing them, through factors both in and out of her control, but feels like everything has to be her fault just because some things were.

and to be fair, that story is still present in the show. its there and definitely compelling, but it could've been even more so. i feel like if maybe there was less 'nancy has to be a strong independent girlboss' in there (abd it's definitely there, they want to make a point of making her a Strong Woman Character so bad) and she was allowed to have mistakes acknowledged by the narrative, this is the direction it would've gone. She could've been an excellent example of well written women who are strong and awesome through their own right instead of the narrative trying to make us like her

#nancy wheeler #stranger things meta #stranger things thoughts #platonic stancy #stranger things #platonic stancy because while this could definitely be used in a jancy breakup then stancy fic #my personal theory is that she thinks she should like him romantically because he sees her like that but she actually likes him as a friend #and the bullshit scene was just the worst way for her to say it because she waited so long and refused to when she was sober #also didn't tag anti-nancy because i don't think it is really? like its anti-canon-depiction-because-i-think-they-did-her-dirty #also this is kinda nancy pov so its not like she's actually at fault for everything but in her mind she blames herself anyway #so yea #the fic is my Steve Henderson AU btw for ppl who've never seen me before #stancys not the focus (its steve pov with the Hendersons being main characters) but i want to do a serious platonic stancy workthrough in i #so this is just my headcanons (technically canon compliant based on what we see on screen but not following the narrative direction y'know) #devon's steve henderson au #steve henderson au rambles #hoping praying to god this doesn't make people angry but if it does feel free to block me i don't mind and i really dont want to argue #no disc horse for me just silly little thoughts and headcanons thanks for understanding #devon thinks sometimes

[skrunksthatwunk]

i just finished saw v and i don't have high hopes for the rest of the franchise (based on what ive heard) but im in too deep to stop now

#no i haven't enjoyed the last two no i don't expect to get much out of the next five or so movies. but i need to know. #i guess saw v mightve suffered bc i watched it basically immediately after iv #something i didnt do with any of the others #but i was told v was one of the good ones so i was looking forward to it. i dont think it was burnout yknow #but uh. i didn't like it. i think i liked iv more honestly. strahm and hoffman do absolutely nothing for me #i liked the traps. that was it though #it felt so pointless and empty. it was the first one where i genuinely wondered why they made it. why did they decide to keep going with #this. i think ii and iv both function more/better as setup for their following films but like. at least iii was pretty good yknow #like both amanda and hoffman's accomplicing feels kinda retconned in but at least amanda's an interesting character #what does hoffman have. what does strahm have. nothing. and no i don't think they have much in the way of homoeroticism either. #i don't tend to be so negative and im sorry if someone goes in the saw tags and feels bad about me talking shit about something they like #because i know that doesn't feel good. honestly i'd love to hear why people like v. maybe it'll change my opinion of it if i look at it a #different way yknow? but for now im just annoyed by it. iv was engaging in the moment but very forgettable #i liked riggs well enough but we barely learned a thing about him. he wasn't a deep character at all and i think that's a shame #but v was just a paperwork-based cat and mouse chase. 90 minutes and it still felt like they were wasting my time #why did strahm go to the old trap locations? i don't think he found anything out there. likr it was just a framing device for the flashback #but he didn't actually have a reason to go there. waste of my time #not an original critique im sure but saw ii on seems to be more focused on scale and layers of shit (i.e. having two games going at once) #than using the traps to examine the characters. i mean you go from two guys in a bathroom for a couple hours #learning about who they are gradually at a slow pace vs like 8 people in a house plus cop stuff plus 90 second traps of dubious fairness #hoffman has no real relationship with kramer (unlike amanda) and basically everyone who'd been following jigsaw is dead and so are jigsaw #and (presumably) amanda. what am i supposed to be here for? the vague outline of a saw trap? the type of torture happening? #im not even opposed to that per se but frankly the more they focus on the cops surrounding this shit the less fun it is #why are you making all the traps like 15 seconds long and tied to characters who aren't the primary focus. it's saw #ughh i miss adam. i miss amanda. hell i miss kramer and he was pretty present in this one (flashbackwise) #whateverrr. anyway that poll comparing chainshippng shotgunnshippng and coffinshippng where shotgun was last? lesbophobic. #im only half joking about that. im sure ppl have their reasons for coffin but i also think it's the tendency fandom bias for “two white guy #ships. but hey maybe vi and onwards will add more context to that that'll make me reconsider. i mean i wouldn't have liked the amanda #accomplice thing That much if i'd only seen ii. i think iii really makes it mesh better and it leads to fun character stuff #(though i still think i would've liked it more bc like. amanda was always grateful to jigsaw right? again hoffman comes outta nowhere)

[asthevermincrawls]

ugh

#never thought id make an all tags vent post but im going thru it i guess #i haven't been a big fan of mcr in years but my whole online presence on tumblr is based around it #and almost all my beloved mutuals are mcr mutuals #i want to actually centre my dash/blog around things i actually like again but i dont want to cut off mutuals! they're important to me #and i DO still like mcr. but if i had made this blog this year instead of 5 years ago i would be following 2 mcr blogs and not like. 10 #yanno? #i wanna focus more on vulture culture and nature and writing and stuff like that but i dont want to make a new blog either. ugh!!! #idk maybe i just need to use tumblr less #i still listen to mcr every once and a while and im finishing a dd fic i started a couple years ago but thr fandom is just. so exhausting #and i hate that all my mcr posts get way more notes than my non-mcr posts #I don't want to make mcr fanart again for a multitude of reasons but i feel like people still follow me for that #and are disappointed when i post things im more interested in #and i hate that as soon as i step outside my bubble of mcr blogs its immediately just. people saying the most insane obsessive shit. #and maybe its just #because i dont like them that much anymore #but that shit freaks me out !! i dont like it here! maybe im just a hater but maybe try listening to a different band for a little while #go for a walk or something #i think maybe i just hate fandom #if it wasn't for the fact that i got into it super young i probably never would have joined the mcr fandom #which would still be a bummer because ive grown a lot as an artist and met some great people through bandom #but im beginning to find that im not really a Fandom Person. #i dont really feel the need to go online after finishing a really good movie/show/book and start posting about it and making up headcanons #i mean i want to write arcane fanfic at some point but thats about it #idk #this was all a long and incoherent ramble #maybe i should just make a new blog. but im really attached to this one #anyway pls like if you read i feel embaressed for spewing all this into the tags #a.txt

[lynnetendo]

i've said it before and i'll say it again: miss me with your insulting frustrating Comedic Topic Bingos (TM) when they are literally just statements in square table form. if you make statements in square table form, i cant stop you! cant complain! success! sexy of you to have put a bunch of words out there for people to measure how relatable you are, how accurate your future sight is, how good you deconstructed this topic. make that ask meme you wanted. hot af. go get that confirmation. slay. love. be free

however if you just put a bunch of statements in a square roster WITH SOME FIELDS IN A LINE DIRECTLY CONTRADICTING EACH OTHER OR BEING MUTUALLY EXCLUSIVE, AND CALLING IT A BINGO, YOU'RE SUCCESSFULLY INCREASING MY LEVELS OF FRUSTRATION!! IF THE FIELDS CONTRADICT EACH OTHER IT'S NOT BINGO!! YOU'VE MADE IT UNFAIR BY DESIGNING IT WITH A SECTION THAT IS FULLY UNWINNABLE!!

and if you say "well not everything can be won. these arent supposed to be won" then why didnt you just Not make a bingo...

#/lh #lynne things #idk what to tag this #i get frustrated EVERY TIME I SEE ONE OF THESE VIRAL ASK MEMES IN SUPPOSED BINGO FORMAT #YOU WOULDVE BEEN SO VALID IF YOU JUST MADE A REGULAR ASK MEME OR PREDICTION LIST ETC #YOU CAN FORMAT IT AS A BULLET POINT LIST OR IN A JOKING SURVEY/QUIZ STYLE OR MAKE A PERSONALITY TEST OR A NORMAL ASS TABLE #besides destroying the bingo logic for no reason may i also say this would be better for you in many cases #because like with all structure models used as an analogy; youre running into the following obstacle (that list formats etc dont have): #you are forcing yourself to make it complete: #if you manage to think up 18 cool ask meme statements; you'll need to pull out at least 6 more to fill up a bingo square with 1 free space #why not make it easier on yourself by Not limiting yourself to the shackles of The Bingo Square #be free... be free #a bingo is very not free #this is lighthearted okay!!!!!! i may be genuinely frustrated bc of the sheer amount of false bingo prophets out there and their fans #but this is also just genuinely meant as a playful callout #i typed the post and the tags up on my phone... gross #google search which mental illness causes stupid logic based genuine frustrations like this #im waiting for someone to tell me 'actually in the year 1000bc bingos were...' or whatever kinda factoid that'll make me look like a clown #i already do?... success (i honk my way to the balloon exit)

[gothgaymoth]

.

#i speak #ask to tag #text post #so like i'm not into discourse yeah #but i used to be all 'no puppy masks at pride' and that kind of thing #not extreme like you can't wear leather pants or chokers #but still somehow thinking 'this is sexual' despite the fact. it is not #i just realized that if i'm cool with furries wearing fursuits to pride #why the fuck not puppymask people? literally same shit different material #yes both of these things are kinks for some people #but also both of these things can be not kinks for some people #just like leather pants and chokers #so #yeah i'm fine with that now #in general not even just at pride #if you can be a furry anywhere you can be a leather pup anywhere why not #discourse tw #i guess? #dont harass me over this i have like 10 active followers and just want to put my thoughts down #if you don't agree with me we can just continue on as if this never happened because i actually don't give that much of a shit

[mothslimes]

........

#mik talks #need to do a little tag screaming actually #ignore this #but last post reminded me of this server i used to be in #where evry tiny thing would be censored #and back then i was like okay welp i guess it makes sense because theres so many young people in there #but imma be so real #i think censorship and excessive trigger warnings do more harm than good #life sucks #theres bad aspects to life #you cant censor away the human condition!!!!!! and thinking you can is just gonna disappoint you #most people are not gonna coddle you #and theres a flip side to this!!! which is that this censorship is harmful to the ones being censored too #like me for example #im extremely hyperactive and talkative and like to overshare right #and it always gets me in trouble with moderators in these sort of communities simply because i dont do well with strict rules #i can never follow them #so if the rules are genuinely stuff like 'youre not allowed to mention death' and then like 100 of those it gets so easy to lose track #i constantly had to recehck the rules channel it was exhausting #and then id get told off for everything but majorly #mods were not kind nor patient with me. they would abuse their power. it was genuinely sadistic #for a positivity server everything was constantly centered around telling each other off #and the worst thing is that the same rules wouldnt be the same for everyone like. fi they liked a person theyd make exceptions for them #which was even more frustrating to my brain #i will never forget that one time i was reprimanded for venting about my dad not coming to my graduation because he forgot the date #(because i guess it just wasnt that important to him) #like. not even any sympathy from the mods. only 4 fucking messages telling me to delete the vent #like????? #genuinely pop psychology has fucked with peoples brains majorly it has fried so many braincells #in what fucking universe is that an acceptable thing to do to a person. its cruel. it was all cruelty. it was surveillance culture

[waluigisgaybf]

Im really tempted to just unfollow both those two old friends I posted about earlier, tha I adored and then randomly unadded me on everything :( cause I miss them both individually so badly, and I want to keep following them both to be able to support and reblog their art when they post.........but at this point seeing their posts- art or not- is just making me feel really fucking shitty and sad all over again :(

#I dont know why neither havent just blocked me? #I still see their posts on tumblr and like and reblog and tag them #and I have messaged them both in the past but never got a single response....... #so I know they see me interact with their posts #but neither seem to want contact with me for some reason #yet despite that #just let me follow them and reblog their stuff still???? #I dont know #I just dont know what I did #why did two different people separately do the same thing to me #hell Ray even removed me from FB as far as I can tell but he just doesnt mind me here??????? #and idk about Orpheus tho :( #I think theyve actually responded to some of my lil “miss you and hope youre okay!” messages and dont seem to hate me at all #so maybe I just paranoid and over reacting and just need to try and restart the friendship #but yeah......idk about Ray #I guess its possible he just doesnt use FB anymore and thats why I cant find him on there now #idk #watch both of them not give a shit or even think about it and Im just over reacting #because Ive lost so many friends in the past already because of my own actions :( #personal #lmao sorry ya'll

[hexados-on-a-string]

please PLEASE dont spam my dms. esp if its abt polls that could cause like fandom drama or something of the sort. there were no rules before when it came to dms and asks but this is the one (1) boundary i am now putting in place. its better for me and its also better for u bc i will start lying to get out of an uncomfortable situation like that and i dont think ppl like it when they get lied to. probably. taking a wild guess here.

dont get me wrong i love dms, i love asks even more, i love talking to people, but god bless i have autism i can only handle masking so much and this is supposed to be a safe space for me, i am terrified of fandom drama, do NOT put me in a situation. thank you.

#the person who i kinda want to see this wont actually bc they dont even follow me #we're not mutuals #im still confused about that whole situation #why they came into my dms asking for me to vote on a poll i will never know. i didn't wanna be rude. #id love to be sent more asks and dms and stuff just dont use me for controversial things thank uuuuuu ♥️ #love everyone who interacts w me tho. genuinely makes my days every time #even if i dont respond #sometimes i cant come up w something to say but i still appreciate it anyways #just like. yeah. this is where im supposed to go to post my silly bakugan things not to be peer pressured 😭 #im also like. terrified of fandoms. i have been in so many fandoms and they have negatively impacted my mental health to insane degrees #ive actually had a few tumblr accounts on here too specifically for bakugan but ive ended up deleting them bc. mental illness innit #not bc anyone's done anything when i had those accounts im just like. scared of ppl. too many ppl and i bolt. #gonna try and stick around this time tho #it is kinda funny how small this fandom is bc i recognise ppl but also i dont. actually. remember my old account names???? whoops #and if i dont remember them then no one else will #i think my old account was like. galaxygambling or something like that. i was like 17 at the time. wild. #now im 21. i can feel my bones withering away as i type. my hair is slowly greying. actually that might just be stress. #when will i stop rambling in the tags? only the goddesses know

[smol-tired-binch-blog]

I do kinda hope we get a sequel, it’d be nice to be able to talk about Lorabetta again

#smol has a vent #this aint as bad as my other vents but it's still a bit melancholy to go in my normal 'speaks' or fandom tag #cause like i dont wanna make out like 'oh the attentions not on ME im LEAVING this fandom' cause im not. but like. #it's one of my only fandoms ive ever truly been In. i made friends from it. i developed OCs for it. discussed the lore and game with others. #i was INTO it and made one of my favourite OCs ever. and people actually wanted to know about her!!! #people asked me about her!!! we made our OCs interact!!! thats not happened before!! #i finally felt like i was in a community! but of course things have lulled these last few months #which is only natural of course. people have their own lives and stuff to deal with they get into other fandoms its natural its normal. #the server aint fully dead most of us are still kinda there. i hope it picks up again at some point #but yeah no i finally drew a Lorabetta comic for Easter and i was PRAYING this might get more attention than the last one (which was 0) #cause i was following up a previous comic! one that got attention! i shared it in the server and.... #nothing. no one cared i suppose. ik she's not like the Best or Most Popular OC in the fandom. i dont think she even registers #on a fandom-wide scale. but she matters to me. and it mattered that other people were interested. and that interest just...isnt there anymor #didnt help i nearly had her ruined for me over something i really shouldnt have got so upset about but i had no way of like assuaging #my worries so i lowkey spiralled a little bit so it left a sour taste in my mouth. another reason drawing her comic meant a lot to me #telling myself 'i still love her'. i want others to love her too. is that a lot to ask? maybe. ah well. such is life. #i reckon a sequel would also be very fun but i mostly do just want a reason to go back to Lorabetta. maybe Mollinda too #im sorry i left you by the wayside girls. and sorry to Lanabelle and Edithana for never developing you. but ya meant a lot to me. still do. #'wow shes apologising to her OCs thats so fuckin sad' yeah maybe but im a sensitive bitch me. its how im built lol

[pierregazly]

let's show the world ꨄ carlos sainz smau

carlos sainz x wife!reader

warnings: hateful/mean comments, cyberbullying

in which carlos has to make it clear to the world how much his wife means to him, and how strangers on the internet know nothing about them or their relationship.

f1drivernews

liked by username, username, username, and 11,209 others

tagged carlossainz55 and yourusername

f1drivernews it appears ferrari driver carlossainz55 and wife yourusername spent the summer break in style, rumours have it that the resort they stayed in ibiza was almost €7500 per person a night. sainz and his wife have been notorious for staying in extravagant hotels and resorts during both summer and winter breaks. the lifestyles of the rich and famous continues!

view all 399 comments

username oh the things i would do to be a millionaire

username just be like yourusername and bag yourself a rich husband, constant flow of money lol

username that's a polite way of saying just be a gold-digger and you'll be set babes

username lol the fact b4 he met her carlos used to spend breaks with his fam and friends??? has no one told him how much of a red flag this is???

username girl since when is a driver spending their break with their WIFE a red flag???

username €7500 PER PERSON???? aint no way that was carlos' idea lol what a joke

username i'd be so embarrassed to be yourusername like what does girlypop even do??? other than mooch off her husband ofc

username she's actually very successful in her own line of work? not sure what you're alluding to but yeah

username she could be the top 10% of whatever she does and still not be as successful as carlos, hop off hunni

username guess f1drivernews was too nice to post the hideous closeups of yourusername... girly's not looking too great nowadays poor carlos

carlossainz55 has posted a story

liked by yourusername, landonorris, username, and others

replies

landonorris your mrs told me she got a hole in one, how's it feel to suck carlos

yourusername 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

username bet you paid out of your ass for her for this round of golf too smh

username embarrizzing sorrrrryyy carlos

yourusername has posted a story

liked by carlossainz55, charles_leclerc, landonorris, and others

replies

carlossainz55 thank you for dinner amor, you spoil me as always

username girl delete this rn this is so embarrassing

username loool ur not fooling anyone sweetie

username red nails for a golddigger? typical babes

yourusername

liked by carlossainz55, landonorris, scuderiaferrari, and 2,343 others

tagged carlossainz55

yourusername i'm amazed by you every single day, even more when you come back to our room stinking of champagne 💗

view all 187 comments

landonorris no special post for me?? you told me i was ur son the other day and this is the treatment i get ? emancipation right now

landonorris before you say it, i know that's a big word for elmo. thanks.

alexandrasaintmleux im still obsessed with that jacket 🫶🏻

username you looked so pretty this weekend! carlos is so lucky

carlossainz55 always more special when we're both coming back smelling like champagne hermosa

username i think its like so childish u deleted 75% of ur followers like u wanna be in the public eye but dont want what comes with it??? weird but alright

username im so over you honestly carlos deserves better

username ur acc the worst wag like yikes

f1gossip

liked by username, username, username and 75,903 others

tagged carlossainz55

f1gossip the streets are saying carlos was in suzuka alone this week, his wife of two years yourusername reportedly took a flight home instead of following her husband along to suzuka after the singapore win... trouble in paradise? 👀👀

view all 4,870 comments

username omg it's happening

username FINALLY GOOD RIDDANCE

username my man is back on the market!!!!! time for someone prettier, hotter, better, basically anyone opposite of his wife lol byeeeee

username ur all insane, she has her own job??? she can't follow her husband to every end of the earth

username waiting for the ig stories 'we've decided to split amicably, please allow us privacy'

username LOOOL i bet it's gonna say that word for word!!!! not like we'll see hers tho cause she locked us all out

username this acc made my day ahhhhhhhh

yourusername has posted a story

viewed by landonorris, carlossainz55, alexandrasaintmleux, and others

replies

carlossainz55 amor what's wrong??

yourusername i just dont understand why people have to be so mean.

landonorris carlando to the rescue dont worry y/n

carlossainz55

liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc, landonorris, and 1,399,402 others

tagged yourusername

carlossainz55 this last week has been extra special for me, to know it is the anniversary of the first time i met my best friend, and that she was able to be with me when i lifted the trophy in singapore is a wonderful feeling.

but to see all the ignorant, unkind, and hurtful comments that are regularly directed at my wife has put a negative twirl on this time. my wife, to me, is the most beautiful woman in the world. she is kind, and loving, and has given up the world for me time and time again. no one knows our relationship more than her and i. many of you speak things that are so ignorant and false it is disgusting. if you are one of these people, please know, you are not a fan i find myself caring for.

i beg those who continue to speak poorly of my wife, to think about how your actions can harm others. thank you. and to yourusername, you are the most important light in my life. i cant wait to see you amor.

comments on this post have been limited

landonorris 🧡🧡

charles_leclerc be kind always!

yourusername te amo, always and forever.

carlossainz55 has posted a story

liked by yourusername, landonorris, username, and 55,399 others

replies

yourusername i didnt even see you take that photo... ur so cute ily

landonorris tell her i got 50 of the flowers for her

username omg i love that book!!!! y/n has great taste what a queen

username i would die to be ur wife, but i would also die to be y/n's wife so lol

ahhhh this is the smau part 2 i promised to my last carlos written story! thank you to the lovely person who requested it, i hope it's what you wanted! please let me know what you think, i hope you all loved it 💗

taglist

@leclercdream @myescapefromthislife @princessria127 @iloveyou3000morgan @love4lando @asfaraslifegets @decseptapril @somanyfandomsbruh @fangirl125reader @imagandom @motorsp0rt @jspitwall @sarahedwards16 @glitterf1 @christianpulisic10 @carlandonorri-s @smoothopz @eugene-emt-roe @epitios @ihrtdan @myloverjk-blog @glow-ish @goldenmclaren @mercunty

if your name is bolded/striked tumblr wont allow me to tag you! ive tried multiple things, but it's unfortunately giving me a very hard time with a few people. im so sorry! please let me know if you'd like to be added to the list!!

#carlos sainz #carlos sainz x reader #carlos sainz x you #f1 x reader #f1 x you #formula 1 x reader #formula 1 x you #f1 smau #carlos sainz smau #carlos sainz imagine #f1 imagine #f1 fanfic #f1 #formula 1

[tinylittlebab]

my dash is so dead its so sad >_<

#its hard to find people to follow after so many ppl came from twitter #like. people are out here posting pictures of real life fat people to make fun of them and its so shitty. evil behavior #ed twt was so much more toxic and bc bitched moved from there to here its gotten way worse here #like. when i was here before i literally never saw any actually pro content. that was that tag ppl used but everyone wanted other people to #recover but not theres just tons of actually pro account everywhere. wtf. do you really think that its ok to do that? if you tell someone #who is recovering from this deadly thing that they shouldnt then thats like an evil thing to do. god. its very upsetting. tbh if you dont #have a problem with people being pro then you are part of the problem. how can you not take issue with that? someone who wants people to #make themselves sick and die. its so annoying to find people now bc i srlcroll down and see things blatantly stating that they think fat #people are horrible and its like. you can think that you are horrible if ur fat. its not good to think that but thats why most of us are #here and its not hirting other people. this all ofc all obvious but so many people here just hate fat people. its so shitty. fun fact is #that they are still people and them being dat changes nothing about that. fuck you #anyway. wanna find some ppl to follow who arent horrible

[vulcanhello]

strange new worlds -_- strange indeed

#i have been saying on and off that im gonna watch it so i decided to give it a chance #and by chance i watched the last episode because i love kirk first and foremost #and i already like ethan peck in disco #and i know i dont like pike but i wanted to see about the rest of them maybe #BUT #i am so glad i watched this episode bc it told me exactly what i wanted to know: I Will Not Like SNW #im sorry imaginary audience to my tags but the whole thing was just... messy to me #obv ignoring things i wasnt fully understanding bc of only watching the last ep im not knocking it for me not knowing the girl in the #beginning coming back to arrest number one #but i will knock points for just being so... weird #weird is the best way to put it #some of those CAMERA ANGLEs and EDITING CHOICES? had me missing my colleges student productions where things were good actually #when pike was walking around sickbay and had this vlog camera thing following his reaction i #i mean i remember tos doing something like this as well but i dont think it can be well used as a grief thing tbh maybe its just me #the way they did the mind meld akjfhs didnt realize we were watching tas #there were also a lot of weird editing and cuts that i just didnt like. i think ive said similar things abt disco but i dont think it was #that bad. maybe its just me #i think the only emotion i felt though the whole thing (in line with what they wanted to convey) was the guy sitting there in sickbay with #his would be wife who died. that look on his face got me ok #otherwise. i really am not a fan of pike #is all his stuff wrapped up in time crystals and klingons lmfao i mean that was his whole thing in disco. you took time away from my beloved #michael to have your time crystal problems and youre STILL HAVING THEM in your show?? get a grip tbh! #sorry maybe i was just looking for a reason to be mean to him #i did like some things! i liked uhura A LOT i completely understand why people love her in the show i do too. actress was wonderful i buy #her as a younger uhura #for some reason i didnt like ethan peck as much as i did in disco but then again most of his disco scenes were with michael and those two #were so interesting together sooo idk. miss martin green carries everybody ig #erica was annoying im sorry. did romulans kill her parents or something #i think the girl who plays chapel is cute but tbh her hair is distracting #SO IS PIKES BTW im supposed to be sad while he's sporting that? it should droop like bunny ears when hes sad

[i23kazu]

GENSHIN MEN & YOU USING THEM AS A BODY PILLOW .

characters. wriothesley scara x gn!reader genre. romantic fluff. an. this is so tiney im so sorry anon but this is all my brain can handle rn ueueuueue. i hope this is okay :"))))) . | please reblog!! im getting back into writing and reblogs with tags and comments will make me want to write more :D

wriothesley

wriothesley actually doesn't mind being your body pillow...

i mean. you're comfortable. he's comfortable

everybody wins!

but also sometimes you squeeze him really hard and he freezes up because how are you so STRONG. like what the hell

(secretly he thinks of you picking him up like that. ough)

wriothesley doesn't actually have the heart to tell you to move aside.

how can he, when you look like such an angel wrapped around his waist? bathroom and bladder control be damned.

it's like having a cat on your lap. rule number one: never move from your spot if you're the chosen one. congratulations. you're bound to the couch forever

when you wake up, though ... wriothesley has fallen asleep. now it's your turn to not move. you're the body pillow now. hehe.

scara

grumpy cat. gruuuuumpy cat

okay i feel like maybe i push the scara hates things agenda a lot. i don't actually think scara hates this... when he knows that it makes you happy, he's willing to sacrifice his back just for you

maybe at the most he acts as if he's reluctant. dont let it fool you though – he's warm to the touch and actually a relatively good cuddler.

please don't be fooled! he might warm up to the idea sooner or later

it really is a win though, please keep convincing him. he gets cuddles, you get cuddles, and he doesn't even have to ask for it! no more convincing himself that he's fine and doesn't need that

especially when you initiate it. just keep doing it – watch as he slowly inches closer towards you. maybe he even tries to put his arm on your waist, stroking it with his thumb. just maybe.

and maybe, you're the one who allows him to open up to physical affection.

taglist: @tiredsleep @loptido @raincxtter @chichikoi @ladyadii @soulsanta @sheiiths @genshinparty @eowinthetraveler @moonbyunniee @legitnoi @lemontum @manager-of-the-pudding-bank @starz222 @ilyuu @cherry-colored-petals @mondaymelon @tartaglia-apologist @soleillunne @m1shapanda @aimynx @smokipoki @adeptuscharm @diorlumx @vennnnn-diagram @ryuryuryuyurboat @yuminako @st0pthatsgay @aqualesha @sixtynintharchon @supernova25 @kunikuda-simp @starglitterz @rin-nyrasti-writes (send ask/comment to be added to taglist) plus birthday tag!! @catcze hope u like the wriothesley part, pls cuddle himmmm

reblogs w/ tags & comments help me lots !!! if you liked this and would like to support me, please consider dropping me a follow as well :-) they all go a long way!

#[📝 stewardess' notepad!] #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin x gn reader #astronetwrk #genshin impact x gn reader #wriothesley x reader #wriothesley x you #wriothesley x y/n #wriothesley x gn reader #scara x reader #scara x you #scara x y/n #scara x gn reader