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st4rgzer · 7 months

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Can you write a about the reader loving Matt sm but knowing he doesn’t like her back. Liek don’t have a super happy ending but also don’t have a super sad one. Do it inspired by me and …

UNREQUITED (matt sturniolo)

summary: the reader experiences some unresponsive feelings from a special someone

genre: angst

cw: taylor swift references maybe…? Is that a warning? Other than that I really don’t think theres much

a/n: as always, @iha8you ‘s request, ly, also dw you’ll get him🙏

This winter had been hell for me, it was always my favorite holiday, the cool air, snow, when it rained and I got to stay home playing boardgames with my mum, or I finally got to read that book that had been collecting dust on my shelf for ages now that it was dark and rainy. No, none of it this year. Every time I hung out with him I held my breath, in fear I’ll do something wrong, take too much space, become too much of a liability. Its stupid, just stupid, I’m his best friend, known him since i was 16 years old, but he seemed so much more older, and wiser.I belittle myself next to him, instead of just letting go, I take a mental note of every little gesture he does that correlates in any way to me, every choice of words, I save them to then divulge them later. It’s draining, not knowing if its just all in your head. If you’ve got it wrong…

“y/n? Hellooo, are you there” i snapped out of my meditative state.I was cross legged on my bedroom floor with two of my closest friends, I didnt even remember what we were talking about anymore.

“yeah sorry i was just distracted” I sighed tying my hair back into a low ponytail and resting my hands on my knees

“we were talking about Matt? Y’know you actually have a chance with him, did you see the way he talked to you earlier?” My friends were only feeding into my delusions, the other nodded in agreement. Even if he did actually see me like that, i dont know what i would do, we’ve been friends since highschool, everything would just be too weird and messy, it wouldn’t be right, no, not with me, not with him.

“No, guys, stop, you’re all just talking nonsense and it just makes everything worse” I groaned, placing my head between my hands.

“C’mon, who could ever leave you?” She says giggling, looking over at my other friend, it wasn’t funny, not in that moment at least. I felt despaired, I know it’s obvious I like him, maybe no one actually takes it seriously when i throw in some extra compliments once in a while of some flirty remarks, but I never try to hide it, except the real thing of course. I know my love should be celebrated, I shouldn’t settle for someone who just tolerates it, but I keep going back to the same thing, always, no matter how many people I see, no matter how many excuses I make to not hang out, its like a moth to a flame, I know im bound to get burnt, trust me. My friends keep convincing me, I feel petty having to listen to them try and make me feel better. Sometimes I come close to actually getting serious then I just think its a waste of time, he just always assumes im fine when my eye contact becomes non existent and my words get mixed up, I dont think he notices it at least, I dont think he ever notices. I guess this means im just doomed, It doesn’t matter how many times my friends reassure me, how many “glances” i pick up from him, Im never going to be one of his main concerns, unrequited. Im always just dimly lit, just enough. I should start trying to accept, settle, “always the bridesmaid, never the bride”.

a/n: this is kind of sht i wrote this at 1:00am, I’ll write more with requests🙏😊😊

#matt sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #matt sturniolo x reader #sturniolo fanfic #matt sturniolo image #matt sturniolo angst

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worldussysblog · 9 months

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A Glimpse of the Future

[ Malleus x Reader/Yuu ]

Warnings: some Grammatical errors ,Fluff , angst if you squint , Negative thoughts , Gender Neutral! Yuu (a child is mention but the it's still gender neutral just imagine that the child is created/born by magic)

Summary:In which during their nightly strolls together Malleus suddenly spaces out and he may or may not have caught a glimpse of the future or better yet Malleus had find the missing piece in his life.

Prounouns used: They/Them , you/your

The sun had already set which means its time for Malleus to meet his nightly companion who happen to resides inside the old abandoned dorm that he used to visit to relax his mind.

"Hmm its already night , the child of man is probably already at our usual place , well i can't have them waiting for me any longer" Malleus thought to himself and without wasting anymore time he quickly teleported himself to their usual place , the said usual is none other than the Ramshackle Dorm where his human companion and their troublemaker cat currently resides in.

At Ramshackle Dorm:

You just finished getting ready for your nightly strolls with your horned friend and youre gonna admit that you always look forward for this nightly strolls together.

Staying here in Twisted Wonderland had its up and down but you manage to get through all the hardship this world had given you along with the troublemakers who you call 'Friends' , sure they always manage to find a way to indulge you to their shenigans but you love them still especially your cat companion who likes to call himself "The great grim-sama" and you his 'Henchman'. And while you're at it you may or may not have caught feelings for a certain dragon you call "Tsunotaro" .

You truly treasure those precious moments with them and thank the ghost camera the headmage had given you , you manage to capture every single moment.

But no matter how long you stay here nor you get close to the people who live here something felt wrong , maybe it's because you dont belong here? In this world? This thoughts is running like a toy train inside your brain. You often ask yourself whether if you try harder you can belong in this world even if you're magicless. Sure there might be some other people who doesn't have any magic in them but they make it up by being good to some other things , but you? What can you offer to make yourself useful and be one of them? Are enough to be Malleus partner if he ever happen to reciprocate your feelings? Or will you be rejected and just be friends forever? The answer is simple just be yourself because you existing in this world is already enough , YOU. ARE . ENOUGH , that's what the voice said in the back of your mind. But you wonder is just being yourself enough to belong here? The voice inside your mind answered once again "Yes" .

You quickly shook your head to shake away all the negative thoughts because tonight is such a fine night and you can't let it be ruin because of your negative thinking. As soon as you manage to calm your mind , you manage to catch a familiar green light outside the dorm , looks like your nightly companion is here. You quickly went out of the dorm but not without putting a blanket over Grim so that he wouldn't get cold without your warmth.

Outside Ramshackle Dorm:

"Hmm looks like the child of man is still inside the dorm" Malleus thought after seeing that Yuu is nowhere in sight.

As soon as you went outside you immediately called your friend

"Yo Tsunotaro! Good evening! How long have you been waiting here? Im so sorry if I kept you waiting" You said feeling bad if you had made him wait for so long.

Malleus chuckle at the silly nickname you had come up with when he gave a permission to call him what ever you want and even after knowing who he is, you still choose to call him that. But somehow with the way you call him it made his heart swell with happiness , he's glad he met you that night.

"At ease Child of Man , first of all Good Evening too and No I did not wait for so long because I myself just got here" Malleus said while smiling down at you.

"Oh phew I honestly thought I had made you wait , i can't have Sebek scolding (more like screaming) me for making his 'Wakasama' waiting" You said as you chuckles

"Well shall we go on to our nightly stroll?" You added

"We shall"

As you two are enjoying the beauty of the night , you ask your friend something but you notice that he's not paying attention to you and is currently spacing out.

"The moon is beautiful tonight, dont you think so Tsunotaro?" You asked as you looked at your friend only to find he stop walking by your side and that he's spacing out

"Tsunotaro?" You tried to wave your hand in front him but he's not showing any signs of moving.

With Malleus:

Ever since he was a little kid , Malleus had always dreamt of having a garden for which he can be proud of but... no matter how hard he improve his rose garden something is always missing , he often wonders if he doesn't take care of it enough or it must be something that he might find in the future.

Years had passed since then, his rose garden had improve it gotten bigger than before but still nothing had change , he still felt that something is missing. And so his journey in NRC had begun , even here in his new school he's still isolated and always being left out be it his classmate or his fellow housewarden , heck he never even gotten to attend any of the ceremony meeting nor was he invited to any outings/meeting. He honestly thought this will go on until he graduate in NRC but that all change when he encountered the strange human who he found out is now residing to his favorite abandoned place and the said human doesn't even know him and still had the guts to call me such strange silly nickname but somehow it felt right their meeting feels right it's as if they're meant to meet.

As soon as he teleported himself back Diasomnia Dorm after meeting the strange human he quickly look for Lilia to tell him his strange encounter with the magicless human. And of course Lilia was ecstatic after finding out that Malleus had found himself a friend but the latter quickly shook it off saying they just met and that they're not friends but Lilia just grin and said-

"Yet"

"Huh?" Malleus said with a questioning look

"Yet, Malleus you guys are not Yet friends but soon you'll be"

"How can you be so sure about that? Who knows they migjt be scared of him once they know who I really am"

"Trust me when I say you two will be friend , you two will be Friends. Besides my fatherly instincts never fail me , who knows you two might be more than friends in the future tehehehe" Lilia said while giggling to himself.

"Okay?" Malleus replied not understanding what Lilia meant on the last part.

While Malleus is spacing out , he found himself in place he's very much familiar he's currently in his Rose garden but he wondered when did he get there? Isn't he with Yuu a few moments ago? But... something is different he can feel it , he's in his garden but somehow he found it quite strange because this version of his rose garden seems more lively like its complete. And so he decided to look around while doing so he heard two voices one is familiar while the other not so much , he followed the sound of the voices and finally he reached the source of what he had heard and there he found himself staring at the back of someone , now he wonders whether this is his rose garden or it belonged to someone else and that he just accidentally intrude it so he decided to leave and teleport himself a before he could do it he found himself staring at what seems his future self approaching someone who's holding a mini version of himself and the person who's back he previous stared at turns around only to reveal Yuu his companion of the night the one he was with before he was sent here in what seems a future version of his beloved rose garden.

At that moment Malleus had come to conclusion that he may or may not had been catch a glimpse of his future no their future together and he realises that the reason why the rose garden feels different is because it's now complete he's no longer the only one who goes there because now he has someone that he can share his rose garden with. Together with his future child and spouse they all live happily and his garden is now more lively than before.

"Ha, no wonder i felt like our meeting/encounter that night is meant to be , it's because the two of us are really meant to be , to think that all this time i kept on looking on how to improve my garden for it to be the garden I can be proud of but the only thing that's missing is you" Malleus said as he put his hand on his head with a smile plastered on his handsome face.

Malleus had finally realized that all those nights he spent all alone in his room and garden , all those day where he keeps looking to make a perfect garden and why his beloved rose garden back at Briar Valley never felt home is because something or someone is missing but now he finally found that missing piece and it was Yuu whom he been looking for all this time , it was them that filled the empty void in his lonely heart.

Bonus:

You keep waving your hand in front of your friend but he still showed no sign of moving and so you decided to call his name.

"Hey! Tsunotaro are you there?" You said

"Earth to Malleus?"

"Dark lord?"

"Emo boy-"

"Horny boy-"

"Edge lord-"

You sighed realizing no matter how much you call him he won't answer and so decided to do something you knlw you will regret- slapping him. You raised your hand ready to aim at his beautiful face but before you can do it , Malleus suddwnly snap out of his thoughts.

"Ahh, sorry for spacing out Child of Man I was just thinking of my rose garden back at home"

"Woahh you have your own garden? Sickkk"

"Heh indeed I do , the flowers are even more beautiful when they bloom but it will look more beautiful when the petals have fallen on the ground, It's the garden I'm proud of so if you have a chance to visit the Briar Valley , I'll definitely show it to you" Malleus said with a smile on his face before looking back at you.

"Ohh that's great!! Looking forward to it !!" You said as you gave him a close eyed smile.

"Im glad you're looking forward to it but put that aside, what did you just call me? I heard you called me what was it? Ahh yeah Edge Lord "

"Eh? I don't remember calling you such names hehehe"

The End♡♡

#twisted wonderland #malleus draconia #twst #twst x reader #malleus x mc #malleus x reader #malleus draconia x reader #twst fluff #Glimpse of the future #worldussysblog #slight angst

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bibberbang · 10 months

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i dont reblog those posts about how hard it is to have moralizing ocd in online spaces, even though i deeply resonate with them. ironically, i can only talk to 2 people about my ocd, because one of my obsessions is that other people will assume im using my mental health as a shield against criticism if i talk about it. therefore, if i talk about my ocd in any circumstance, my brain believes that i'm already doing something immoral

basically, most of my obsessions resolve around people assuming bad faith of me or that i'm somehow secretly an irredeemably bad person, no matter how hard i try to be good. i am a bad person if i dont reblog posts about serious topics, spend every waking moment thinking about extremely serious topics, or make any social mistakes whatsoever (which is scary because i'm also autistic). i believe that i am irredeemable if i make a small mistake, and i often think all my friends are waiting for me to make a mistake so that they can attack me, and that my life will be ruined if i fuck up. im constantly scanning all my interests (and people i know) for the tiniest imperfections (far beyond healthy amounts of criticism in your interests) out of fear that liking anything or anyone makes me a horrible person. if you dont take a side on this lgbt label discourse, then youre a bigot! im ALWAYS mentally preparing responses and apologies to totally theoretical situations of people being upset with me. i have intrusive thoughts about doing the immoral things that scare me most.

the problem is, *talking about* any of these thoughts invites people who will actually bad faith me. "if youre so worried about this stuff, then you must have something to hide! you just want to avoid accountability!" they make your obsession a reality by accusing you of the exact thing you fear most. none of these thoughts are reasonable or realistic, and i know that. i know that i'm mentally ill. i know logically that i'm as good a person as anyone else. when i actually do make a mistake, i stay level-headed and apologize, acknowledge what i did wrong, and change my behavior

but there is a large part of me that does not want to heal from my ocd, because i believe constant self-monitoring and self-critique is the only thing preventing me from becoming a horrible person

there is nothing i want more in this world than to be a good altruistic human being who is capable of growth, but spending weeks trapped in thought loops analyzing all my behaviors for the smallest signs of a mistake will not help me be a better person. it makes me a worse friend. it drains my energy so that i dont have the mental capacity to actually spend time being kind to others. i reread this post many times while writing it to make sure i didnt accidentally write 6 different slurs. but i can't figure out how to heal. what the fuck do i do about this

this is incredibly hard for me to write about. i'm fighting the urge to delete this post as you read it. i cant stress how debilitating this is for me, it is the biggest hurdle in my life and it sucks away days worth of my time and energy. i will become trapped in thought-loops THE SECOND im not kept sufficiently busy and stimulated by tv/music/my bf/being out of the house somewhere/etc. so much of my life is wasted wanting to be good, that i dont get a chance to actually live the life of a good person

i really hope this post resonates with someone. ive only met a few other people who have this particular kind of ocd, and its extremely isolating. but i want to try to heal from it, and i know the first step to healing is talking about it

#have you ever noticed how i'll add addendums in the tags of my posts where i'll clarify EXACTLY what the post was about?#i do that bc of my obsession that some1 will screenshot something i say out of context and make me look horrible #this is not just a Go Outside problem btw. i know a lot of the examples i gave were internet related #but ive had ocd since i was a child. the other half of my symptoms are health related #like obsessions about emetophobia. or food being contaminated or making me sick. or other physical illness #ppl assume ocd is just washing your hands and not wanting to be touched. naur. i wash my hands a normal amount and i love being touched #so i didnt believe i could have ocd for a long time cuz i didnt fit the stereotype. even though it was incredibly obvious and debilitating #amygdalae #ocd #actually ocd

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wonder2realities · 13 days

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as someone who came into the manifestation / LOA space like before the void state and neville goddard was even talked abt - its rlly interesting to see how much ppl focus or try to act as if the void state is the only way to manifest

cuz like i found out abt the void state like 2 years ago through shifting, but prior to that everything ive manifested has always been super simple i mean currently im literally living my dream life in so many ways possible (i can go into heavy detail in another post lolz) and it was never through the void state or through me reading pages of neville goddard and theories and shit and this isnt me saying theres anything wrong with that its just interesting how no matter how much time passes and different trends with the community continue there's always this need to "logicise" and almost profit off of manifestation

for example i remember ppl would pay money for someone to write affirmations for them (idk if ppl still do this) or people would pay to get tips, i rmbr ppl paying money for OTHER PEOPLE to go into the void state in like 2022 so that they can manifest for you etc — that alongside the concept of manifestation coaches and influencers and its so...tacky

and the same thing goes for submakers, as someone whos had a lot and i mean A LOT of shitty experiences with larger submakers (cons of being a blk autistic ; not a lot of ppl want u to exist happily...if i had a penny for everytime someone asked me to manifest my autism away id be scrooge mcduck) — a lot of them also fall into this category of turning manifestation or LOA into this profitable business and its sad honestly

something that is free, where you dont need anything is being turned into something that is behind a paywall - its almost sinister honestly and rlly makes me feel bad for any younger ppl (like 10-15) who are getting into manifestation or interested in it because u basically have ppl being like "YOU CAN ONLY GET UR DESIRES IN THIS ONE WAY. IF YOU WANT, I CAN DO IT FOR YOU BUT YOU NEED TO PAY ME TONS OF MONEY!!!" - it almost gives a subconscious message that they cant do it on their own which goes against the whole point of manifestation and it just sucks ass

idk maybe im like a commie in the manifestation society #downwiththesocialhierarchy but it rlly irks me and i dont like it and again maybe its cuz i dealt with a lot of bullshit before the LOA community became more...minority friendly and that shit TRAUMATISED ME but like idk i just dont fw it yk

u can do wtv u want in wtv way u want for free, u cant buy a consciousness so you dont need to waste money on shit (obviously if u wanna support a submaker or someone thats perfectly fine but you dont HAVE to)

#ᡣ𐭩 wonder2realities #zzz ... cici's rambles #shiftblr #desired reality #shifting consciousness #quantum jumping #shifting blog #scripting #manifestation #shifting antis dni #kpop shifting #law of manifestation #loablr

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winryrockbellwannabe · 6 months

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hey, first off all just wanna say your blog is so cool i love seeing you on my dash!

i was just wondering if you had any tips for first year students and how to manage time? i think that’s the aspect i have been struggling with the most is time management and getting enough sleep rn.

omg tysm!!! 💜💜💜 so glad you like my posts!! and hope your enjoying your 1st year so far <3

So, how to manage your time:

tbh I haven't understood it that well myself. Personally im a little time blind, so i coordinate my schedule based on tasks i have to do, instead of time.

So instead of: study physics for an hour, it could be something like: understand The Schrödinger equation or study 40 pages.

My only time blocks are: morning, afternoon (before snack time, before dinner) and before going to bed. Which i particularly like since it's more flexible, and if i didn't manage to accomplish everything, i can just move it a bit, instead of ruining the whole thing.

My planner usually looks like this: (it's a bit light, since i had classes all day both monday and today, but you get the idea)

But if you like to study in time blocks, my tip is to give them space to be flexible. So if you delay smth it doesn't ruin your entire schedule, and you won't be so stressed about the time as well.

For example, you think you'll take 1h to do this assignment? Save 1h30 for it, if you end up actually needing this extra time, then you're still in time. If you only needed 1h, you can take a break and move to your next task earlier than planned.

Alarms are a student's best friend for time tracking. And a bonus advantage is that it also forces me not to be on my phone, since i set the alarm in there, and it's a visual reminder that i should be working.

Another important thing to do is to ✨ prioritize✨ your tasks!! Your final exam is way more important than a report that's only 10% your grade. Sure, if you can do both it's perfect, but don't waste too much time perfecting smth that's not that important.

Oh, and if you feel like the way your professor explains isn't doing it for you, just forget about that class! It's a waste of time to be 2 hours in a classroom, not even understanding what the professor is saying and stressing about it. Just find some good notes, and study them in the library during that time instead.

Also, for the not enough sleep problem. I feel you. That was me in the second semester of 1st year. I would lose track of time, sometimes just procrastinating, and forget to sleep. My solution for that is ✨alarms✨. I usually wake up at 7:30, so everyday i have an alarm set for 23:00 to remind myself to go to sleep, and another for 24:00, just in case i ignored the first one lol. Really improved my sleep schedules.

(And a little extra (tho i intend to do a bigger post about this soon)

1st year tips in general: Find ways to be interested in your classes, so it's easier to study. Watch documentaries about it, discuss stuff with ppl that love that subject. Even if you are learning how to solve integrals so you can help your crush - totally not talking from experience. If it get's you motivated, then that's all that matters. DONT BE AFRAID TO ASK QUESTIONS!!! I promise your professors aren't judging you, and if your classmates are, well, they won't be judging anymore when you ace that test. And force yourself to take breaks. I would put on my t.do list to watch an episode of a series daily, bc i would be so stressed i would forget to do that. And taking breaks it's super important.)

(sorry for the huge post, I really hope at least one tip in here will be useful for you. Thank you for the ask, and best of luck for this uni year!!! Feel free to ask anymore questions💜)

#asks #studyblr #study blog #studyspo #stemblr #stem student #study blr #time management #adhd things #adhd study tips #- since most of those are time management tips most of my adhd friends also use

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bonefall · 1 year

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Why doesn't Blossom just. leave? Idk if that sounds weird since you have talked about how the clans essentially function like a cult (although this was in reference to starclan), but if Blossom feels so completely isolated and shut off, why not just. Run away.

Blossom literally gets told 'no one cares about you, why not just disappear?", and the clan does NOTHING to say otherwise, and their silence is basically agreement. Suicide tw, to someone who is already at their lowest, or just climbing out of it at least, that line could have horrible implications- you dont matter, just fade away, no one would notice, etc. Idk if that was intended (ashfur seems like the kind of asshole who would intend it but i dont think you intended it), but. yeah its horrible.

Since im believing it wasn't intended, maybe change it? Emptycry could work (instead of 'no one cares, you're a waste of space' its 'your words are empty, be quiet'), or maybe naming her Rottedpetal- the flowers have been shredded, and now they have begun to rot instead of growing anew. Or, if you want to keep the name, Blossom snaps and decides that he's speaking the truth- so she leaves. Maybe she becomes a loner (does the lake territories even HAVE any loners that function similar to Barley, Ravenpaw, Smudge, etc???), or joins another clan (i highly doubt this since the other clan would eventually learn of 'clearface' and start calling her that again, or worse kick her out for breaking the code), OR she becomes a kittypet, completely willing to trade freedom just to be loved.

...forgive me but I feel like a lot of people are missing the point of Dishonor Titles and why and how Ashfur uses them.

Ashfur is picking the cruelest possible names he can think of exactly because he wants the people who oppose him to be broken. He is finding a character's deepest insecurity and putting it on full display, forcing the other cats in the Clan to join in on his mental abuse to set them against each other.

This serves the purpose of showing that Ashfur is even worse than Bramblestar, and that he is very perceptive of people's insecurities.

The cruelty is the point. These titles from the Impostor aren't meant to be petty, they are meant to be gutwrenching.

Why does Blossomfall not leave? Because her entire family is here. Father, siblings, three children, any friendships she's finally started working on. She had to beg to come back in on their grace and she will not get another chance. Random humans aren't an option. It hurts but she eats it, knowing her only options are to take it for the next two weeks or be exiled forever.

If she was going to leave because of the name, then that is something Bramblefake can use as well. "Codebreakers are weak cats. She couldn't handle having her disrespect thrown back at her and cared more about her pride than her Clan. A traitor twice, now a traitor thrice."

But things were just finally starting to get better for her, and she's not willing to leave her entire life behind for the exciting opportunity to... live alone in the woods. Not yet.

She becomes a rebel later, but not yet.

#better bones au #Also she is not suicidal and I never even implied this #I am not fond of how quickly people jump to 'why do they not simply leave everyone and everything behind'#And live in the woods alone??#Blasting a missile from my blaster: 'THE CODE ALLOWS ABUSIVE LEADERS TO LEVERAGE POWER AGAINST THEIR VICTIMS'#'OPPOSITION TO THE GOVERNMENT IS A MORAL NECESSITY IN TYRANNICAL TIMES'#'AUTHORITARIANS ARE BAD'#Staring at me instead: 'wow! you probably didnt intend for this to be so mean'#I'm going to start a swear jar for 'why don't they just leave'#Jessy COULD leave. She had somewhere to go #Tallstar could have too #The vast majority of the Clan cats don't #They live in a theocracy #And in the cases of Jessie and Tall there is a huge point I'm making about how hard it actually is to leave your life behind #There is something good and worth salvaging in Clan society but its structure leads to tyrants by its very design #And TBC is an arc about addressing that #Bristlefrost gets merc'd early and I did that on purpose to set the tone #That's why I kicked the thing off with something so brutal

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bismuthburnsblue · 3 months

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ok so!!! i revisited my work from yesterday, going in and properly blocking out the style lines and strap (still up for change as i get into better fabrics but this is a lot more representative of what they would actually look like now!) (though i am noticing ive set my hemline lower- even extending it on nora, when anne's is quite high, so ill have to see how comfortable i feel with that)

i also took a bit out of the hips on the ally pattern which definitely helped with the shape (i was really just being lazy not doing this, ive used this pattern before and had to do that, i knew it was gonna be an issue)

Theres more notes on my personal thoughts on both patterns below the cut :)

same cw's as before for body image stuff :) (maybe this is silly but i just feel far more comfortable putting warnings + a readmore for corsetry)

(also! i will be doing a post properly introducing this project soon :) ive got a lot i want to say!!)

First up! both of these patterns are by Aranea Black, pdfs of these patterns are still available online but her website is gone now)

Ally is a 6 panel corset with extreme hip spring- heres what the pattern looks like:

i do think the hip spring gives a really dramatic shape, but i do worry that with my upholstery weight faux leather, it just wont sit nicely. on this mock up i had to slit my entire seam allowance at the waist to make it not tuck too badly, and that means cutting my boning channel in half (i think, still deciding details like that) i cant really afford to waste fabric recutting panels if i sew it and it does tuck, either.

(Technically i do have the option available to me to do a twin stitch like Anne's original corset actually has, but this wouldnt be traditional, and wasnt in my plan (even if i wasnt gonna have the bones in the leather layer, i like the /look/ of felled channels on the outside.) a twin stitch however would probably negate most the tucking on the waist point, as it opens it up rather than folding to one side.)

Secondly, the one gripe i have about this pattern is that big line of wrinkles below the waist- now some of this will be from the fabric and it not being worn in, but the "daily wear" version of this corset ive made before still has some of these wrinkles even now, especially over the first hip spring panel. i know theres ways to adjust the fitting to counter the ones over the hip, but those i think are largely from the way the fabrics pulling around the curve- its covers such a large area its bound to pull a little weird in places. I really want a smooth look, a clean finish is the most important thing to me, and i worry no matter what i do they will still be there.

I will say, Ally has a lacing gap designed into the pattern, which is something i want, as Anne's corset has one, and it automatically gives you more leeway in the fit that patterns without it just dont have.

Nora on the other hand is 8 panels, with the hip spring spread across a much further space. On paper it looks much less dramatic, but theoretically should still hold a significant amount of shape, just distributed over more panels.

I guess that would be my first area of concern, that the shape just isnt quite as dramatic as the shape on Ally. i really want something quite striking for this project and though pattern modifications can be made, i was hoping to not have to do too much past simples changes.

The 8 panels also means this pattern will likely eat up more fabric. if nothing else, theres 4 extra sides of seam allowance that the other does not have (though, these pieces will nest together better, so it could end up being negligible) it is a concern however, as im working on a very tight yardage.

One of the immediate positives of this pattern however is the lack of that wrinkle band like Ally has. Since this is worn as an outer layer thats a huge point in its favour, a nice clean finish is basically the top of my requirements list.

Nora also has no lacing gap, which is an issue for the reasons mentioned above (annes costume has a lacing gap, but also lacing gaps give more leeway in the fit, allowing you to be a little tighter on some days than others.) Its possible to draft in a lacing gap relatively easily, but it is something i have to consider.

Its completely arbitrary, but i also feel like the way the strap joined onto this pattern was nicer- it lined up better with the pre existing panels and i think it'd join on as a continuous piece better. again, its extremely minor, i just think its cleaner with less fiddling on my end.

I think im still thinking the same way i was yesterday, that Nora is probably the pattern thats working better for me for this, but its still very up in the air for me. i feel like theres more pattern modifications to do there, but that its probably going to be worth doing the work? but i am definitely interested in what anyone else might think!

#hA sorry for the vibes of the yesterday post i was frustrated w some stuff and not achieving as much as i wanted #and fitting is always. a Task for me #anyway! here is your usual obnoxiously long post i bet you really missed this :)#i would apologise but. no. sewing talk makes me happy so!#but if u read it all. kisses and then i am very interested in input #anne bonny cosplay #also lol i was testing some shit w the top visual wise pls ignore that mess actually

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kaylor · 2 months

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Is campaign 3 worth watching 😭 im somewhere near ep 45 and there have just been so many arcs that do nothing for me. The stakes feel absurdly high for uhh level .. 6? and i thought it would get good at some point but if they still cant make a plan by ep 80 i dont think i care to waste my time 😭😭

yuhhhh i don't know man. the malleus key and the fallout of it is pretty dope, and idk how many spoilers you've seen so i'll leave it there. but after that it gets very boring again i can't lie.

you're so right about the high stakes!! these characters haven't had any space to breathe or grow since like episode 20 or whenever it was they found out about predathos and the world ending. they've been chasing a plot they're not ready for without doing any of the character work that makes you care about their goal. it's difficult to see why the party is together in the first place because they don't talk to each other or have any reason care about each other (except fearne/orym and imogen/laudna but the latter is so bland it's actually painful).

the party doesn't gel, there's no motivations from anyone beyond orym having a personal stake in it. imogen is so wishywashy about everything. none of them care about the gods except FCG, and no one in the party cares about FCG. except ashton, who is played so passively and unpleasantly that it doesn't even matter. there's no caleb/vax doing his biweekly checkins with each party member to unlock new dialogue. there's no fjord/grog to make a buckwild (yet thematically relevant) decision to direct the party in any direction. there's no driving force behind any of these characters like sorry liam and travis, turns out if you take a backseat to let your friends have the spotlight, they will do sweet fuck all!!

another problem i think is how they're given so many pieces of the puzzle at once, whilst the big bad is already in play. i don't know if that was matt's intention, but it's led to them barely following up on any character driven plot points because, well, the world might end. so any extracurricular character development is nixed in favor of chasing a maxxed out uberbaddy who is almost definitely going to kill them. any cool character moments kind of happen in spite of rather than thanks to the events, and honestly feel a bit forced sometimes because the characters have all been so stagnant for so long, and honestly the most interesting things about the characters are their backstories, which have already happened. their current motivations are a mystery and none of them seem interested in learning more about each other. it just feels very awkward and stale.

PLUS, the stakes are absurdly high but also there are no consequences for anything!! laudna dying didn't feel important because it wasn't permanent! because they can apparently just ask a member of vox machina for a resurrection!!! absolutely bizarre choice from matt to allow that, if i'm being completely honest. like sorry i know that's your wife but marisha should be 40 episodes deep into her backup character by now because there's absolutely no way anyone in VM would agree to resurrecting a delilah briarwood puppet let's be so serious. the party (especially imogen) dealing with a PC death would have made for some really interesting development, and would have created an opportunity for imogen to either take a leadership role to get revenge on otohan, OR break bad and turn on the rest of the party. some delicious pvp. but unfortunately laura doesn't seem to know what to do with her character and therefore does nothing, so it felt extremely flat and meaningless, which kind of sums up c3 tbh. some of the highest stakes but barely a PC who gives a shit.

the past say 10 episodes have been a slog for only a handful of cool moments, so i really hope post episode 82 it picks up a bit. plot is fun and situations are fun but i'm struggling to care about any of these characters because it doesn't seem like any of the cast care about them either. which is a shame because some of them have huge potential, FCG is literally an aeormaton!!!! my god you have GOT to get into it. why is no one getting into it!!!! will someone PLEASE pick up what sam is putting down!!! the payoff is always so good!!!

#also if i were matt i would ban the use of the guidance spell #some of them just seem to only care about rolling high and winning d&d #critical role

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heyharoldsboo · 1 year

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Hey everyone, Im gonna assume mama duckling has been getting some very depressive asks lately. Where is Percy, why is Percy not posting, we need to see Percy?!

I understand all of you so much. He has remained silent and as we have discussed many times why, that was the right choice. But I know probably everyone would like a bigger sign of life and would like for him to go out there and pretend like nothing happened. I too think its time for him to "rip off the bandaid" as we speak and face the music. But the truth is that no matter what we believe, what matters is what he feels.

Let me put it into a list for everyone to see. This boy has : been the victim of an online smear campaign, got called a rapist a pedo and a groomer when we all not know he is not one, got made fun of for his appearance. Nude pictures from when he was a legit child, 13 years old, leaked and were shared online and people made fun of his body... he became a victim of sexual abuse himself, do you all realize how messed up that is? people (in the hundreds probably) send him message to kill myself, how his mother should have aborted him and how he is a waste of space and should die. His entire social media likes and history got microanalyzed, so many things he has said or done got twisted into horrible things. His friends and family got harassed. There were petitions to get him fired. Did I miss something? I missed a lot I'm sure.

It has been 3 months, thats it!!!! Some people need a lifetime of therapy to get over what I just listed. Think about it, how would you feel if it happened to you? Would you be ready to face the world so soon? From experience, he has had it rough mental heath wise, no way around it! But slowly, it gets better. What he needs now is support from his fans, friends and patience. GIVE HIM TIME! wtv time he needs. Please dont loose hope and dont be negative. The wait will be worth it, I am sure of it.

And as for duck mom, please don't flood her asks anymore with negativity. Send in positive messages. Im sure she has her own life, work, family, problems to deal with. She's human like all of us! But she's still here supporting Percy whenever and however she can, probably more than any of us do. So be kind to her please, she has done so much! Stop with the gloomy depressive asks and also the asks about Percy's personal stuff. I think its pretty obvious none of his defenders are in the business of spilling his personal info that they most probably don't even know.

be kind and positive everyone please! This will be over at one point and there are many great days ahead! trust that please!

And thanks Ana for all you do xox

Percy is who is important in this story. How he is feeling and how we can better support him. Not us.

We all miss him like crazy because he CHOSE to share his life with us before.

Let’s celebrate him. Show him the love. It’s what I have been trying to do.

And yeah, I’m not in the business of spilling his info. I have shown this day after day here, that if somehow I have information, it won’t leave my hands. It’s a promise I make to everyone who comes to my inbox messages, to every anon that asks me not to share. And it wouldn’t be different with Percy.

So yeah. Thank you duckling. Truly, thank you for your words.

#heyharoldsboo talks #percy is innocent #i stand with percy

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urwendii · 5 months

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I promise this is the last post about that topic, but I have the right to expell it from my system. I know I said [in that ao3 post] that the best answer to toxic writing fandom communities is to get away as soon as possible before it impacts you, and i meant it. I smothered a lot of my discourse in that post since the tone was not about calling out practices and specific inner groups with made up hierarchies. But all in all, there's something dystopian to realise how many have left fandoms with tales that are eerily similar to mine.

The loss is not on my side as a person —not really — im a fairly talented writer in a language that isn't even my native one; a fairly good artist, and generally an overall talented person across many high intellectual topics. Nor is it a loss on the fandom space.

Still. The dichotomy persists everywhere.

All that sideline talent indirectly pushed out from fandoms. Such waste. Art [in all its forms] can not evolve when it's happening in gatekept groups without external emulation. Maybe that's why there's a stagnation in global media literacy across all medias. AUs without much texture, oocness, proudly proclaimed misinformation of canon lore, and passive aggressive bullying behaviours to accept fanon- shipping discourse on first position.

As much as I understand that everyone's online experience is different; when data shows a recurrence — and there I'm just an engineer gathering said data over the past months — that pattern is not too difficult to extrapolate across various relevant factors that tend to be exhibited through specific elitist behaviours in fandoms.

Tldr; months later I still feel like i have wasted a year of my life. Somehow i know realistically this isnt true. Bad things dont makes good things unimportant or matter less and i have met a couple of lovely people wether big or small account, i wrote and drew things im proud of. Yet I learned I wasn't the only one with the exact same feedbacks and this is more telling than anything else.

Maybe we should open a group therapy.

#and with that im closing the page. book.#(its not true. it will hurt for a while but im done pretending)#not rebloggable bc ....well

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