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twohearts-hs · 4 years

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‘A Small Phone Call ( VI {final} )’ - Harry Styles Divorce Series

Words: 2.3k

Pairing: Harry Styles & (Y/N) (Y/L/N)

Warnings: swearing, divorce & I make Harry seem like a asshole even though he isn’t :(

Summary: They’ve been together since fifteen; her going through every moment with him, and likewise. It has always been (Y/N) and Harry, since the beginning of time. But, they started noticing the red flags that the saying is true, all high school love doesn’t stick. Therefore it is time to sign the papers, but what will happen when she is afraid of a simple two pink lined stick? What will happen to them? What if she keeps it hidden from him?

|| Masterlist in bio ||

Y/N walked back into the flat, letting out a deep breath as she placed her handbag on the counter.

“Did you fixed it?” she heard a voice behind her. She turned around and came face to face with Mylene.

Y/N waved her phone in her hand, “Just got off the phone with the lawyer. It is getting fixed right now,” she mumbled, walking around to grab a snack - cheese and crackers, not too bad for a pregnant woman.

“Good,” she heard, as Mylene walked off to her bedroom.

Did she regret it? Of course, it was an action done in anger at the time and now she needed to handle this situation maturely. Y/N has decided, Harry and her were having a baby, however, they can’t have this child together as a couple.

In the past, the two were two peas in a pod, yet now they were both poisonous for each other; what a shame that time ruined them. Does Y/N still believe that she and Harry were soulmates? That is the million-dollar question.

However, that isn’t the question she should answer now. Life has just gone upside down and she is about to become a mother. When she first got pregnant with Tate, she was ready, the nursery was done and excitement flooded her veins. Now, it was the opposite, she was scared shitless. At 24, working a job that barely pays the bills and now a baby on the way, it was scary. Her option could be to ask for a ridiculous amount of money for child support from Harry or just struggle. She is choosing the latter.

Y/N sat at the barstool in her kitchen, craving a large drink, however, she could never do that to her baby. Thoughts upon thoughts were replaying in her brain of what is gonna happen or what will happen; it was scary.

A message appeared on her phone, lighting the darkroom, as she took a bite from her cracker.

From Harry:

I am glad we are ok. H

She smiled, typing her response, but chose not to respond. They were ok. She was going to be ok. This baby is going to be ok. There was nothing to panic about.

He was hovering. She was done. Y/N had enough.

The next while was ok, Harry joined appointments, texted name ideas and was supportive, but the minute she hit 8 months - 33 weeks to be exact - he was annoying, controlling and was just plain trapping her.

Every little moment, he was on her heels. Don’t eat this, don’t carry that, you are putting the child in danger with that, how are you doing, can I help, etc. She was done. Y/N knew he was trying his best to be helpful and to give her a break, but it didn’t come across that way. She felt no freedom once again, just like the marriage they use to be in.

Harry was in her flat, at the kitchen to be exact. He was cooking, she was sitting on the couch with a headache and about to explode in anger. Hormones perhaps? Or was it the fact that Harry has been sleeping on the couch every night and driving her insane? Nevertheless, she was done.

Y/N got up, walking to the kitchen and opening the fridge. She grabbed some food in a container and headed to the microwave. Harry turned around from cutting up vegetables.

“I am making you dinner. You shouldn’t eat Mylene’s trash food. It’s not -”

“Get the fuck out, please and thank you,” she mumbled, pinching her thumb and finger between the bridge of her nose. The pregnant woman knew it sounded harsh, but she was tired and angry because of him.

Harry was taken aback from her attitude. Yes, he has gotten used to the hormonal mood swings, but she was never aggressive or snappy. He glared at her softy, eyebrows scrunching as he examined his ex-wife.

“Excuse me?” he asked, crossing his arms across his chest. She could smell it, a fight heading their way.

“Harry, please, you heard me. Can you please leave?” she mumbled, hearing the microwave beeping and getting her food. Picking up a fork and walking past him. His arm went out, hand grabbing the container and taking the food from her.

“You can’t eat that. It isn’t good for the baby. I am making you a healthy-”

“Harry,” she said sternly, looking him straight in the eyes, “give me the goddamn mac and cheese right now, or I swear to god,” he laughed, taking the container and emptying it in the trash can.

She was done.

“Get. The. Fuck. Out. Of. My. House,” she said, spitting every word with viciousness. “I don’t want you here,” snappiness flooding from her mouth.

Harry shook his head, leaning against the counter and raising an eyebrow.

“You’re being ridiculous, Y/N,” he said, rolling his eyes.

“No, no, no. You do not get the right to say that,” she walked up at him, pointing a finger at his chest. “The last few weeks, you have been absolutely horrible, controlling and just annoying. Yes, I am carrying our child, but we are not married. You can not boss me around and I have had enough. We got divorced for a reason and now you are all up in my face trying to play house. I don’t want you in my life anymore, however, I am being a kind human being and allowing you to have a part in my child’s life. So no, don’t you call me ridiculous. You should be thankful that I am being a humble person. With that, get the fuck out of my house and I will call you when my child is popping out of my vagina.” Y/N turned around, walking to the door and opening it.

Harry stared at her, blinking and trying to take in every word. “No,” he mumbled, turning around and going back to cutting the vegetables.

She was fuming and in shock. He said no, he uprightly said no and went back to what he was doing. What the fuck was he doing?

“Oh, we are gonna play that game,” she responded, stomping past him and heading to her bedroom. Harry watched her and thought nothing of it and went back to what he was doing.

A little while later, she came back with a duffle bag and her handbag.

“Make sure you lock the door behind you,” she said, glaring at him and walking straight for the door.

“Where the fuck are you going?” he yelled, hitting the counter loudly and hot on her tracks grabbing the strap of her bag and pulling her to him. Y/N’s eight-month belly touching his chest.

“Let go of me,” she sternly said. Harry let go.

“Where are you going?”

“Somewhere where you are not. I will call you when I am in labour, but please stop breathing down my neck. I understand you want to be helpful, but I feel trapped. I can’t work, because you said so. I am too much on my feet, which is bad for the baby as you said. I am at home, where you are here and I can’t do that. I can’t be living with my ex-husband. I want a life-”

“You’re being selfish.”

Wet, hot tears were flowing down her face. She backed up against the wall, sliding down. “Just leave.”

And he left reluctantly.

Y/N wanted this baby. She was getting excited. The nursery was built, her baby bag was ready to go and a perfect name was picked. She was ready.

36 weeks hit, no word from Harry since that night. This was a power play, he was trying to make her feel guilty and this was another reason why the marriage had failed.

So, being the higher person she texted him.

To Harry:

Hi. Why haven’t I heard from you? Where have you been?

Two seconds later, he responded.

From Harry:

Are you in labour?

To Harry:

No.

From Harry:

Then that doesn’t concern you.

He was being absolutely ridiculous. Childish even. This is not the way he should be acting. But, she did say that he needed to leave her alone and that she would contact him when she was in labour. She didn’t think he would literally do it. He was being childish.

To Harry:

You are being childish. Text me when you are ready to grow up.

He didn’t respond and she saw on social media that he was in L.A. partying with supermodels. Very mature of you, Styles.

A few days later, the pain hit. No note back from Harry and she was in labour. He could still be in L.A., partying his twenties away, however she didn’t care. She was in labour and was about to become a mother; a single mother, yet she didn’t care. Y/N mentally prepared for this part, knowing she was going to be by herself. Her mother was in another country and Mylene had to move back to Canada. It was going to be ok.

Y/N pressed the name that she didn’t want to talk to, however she needed to be the higher person.

Voicemail. She was hit with a voicemail. Wow.

Hi, its Harry. Couldn’t get to the phone, leave a voicemail and I will get back to you as soon as I can.

The line cut off.

She took a deep breath.

“Hi Harry, its Y/N. Call me back when you can. I am heading to the hospital, as I am in labour.”

Nothing. Nothing came back. She came to the realisation that he was going to miss the birth of his child, just like how he missed Y/N losing Tate.

She was on the hospital bed, taking deep breaths as pain raked her body. Fuck, this was horrible. Words can not explain the pain she was in right now. Yet, she needed to be strong.

The heavy huffs and loud groans were interrupted by her phone going off. Harry Styles - Y/N groaned again and not from the labour.

“Where the fuck are you?” she spat over the line.

“L.A.” She couldn’t believe it, she actually couldn’t believe it. This man was in America still, while she was growing this child inside her.

“Good on you. Are you flying back anytime soon, as I am in labour,” she spat again. He cleared his voice, hearing her heavy breaths and wheezes over the line.

“Umm, yeah, I will be there. my flight is leaving in three hours. I will be there in like, ten hours so please just don’t give birth yet,” he told her.

Y/N was gobsmacked. He really thought that she could put her whole birth on pause, just for him.

“I am crowning. I am pushing this child out whether or not you are here. I am not putting this on pause. Get your ass here,” she said firmly and pressing the end button.

Did she want him there holding her hand as she pushed a child out of her? A little piece of her did, but the majority of her was done with him. She had the forms next to her, filling out what custody was like and she was ready to move on. Was she selfish? She has no idea. However, the wellbeing of this child comes first.

Her legs were in the air, she pulled herself close to the bar as the doctor asked her to push. One push in and the door flew open. He was there.

“Fuck, you look rough,” he mumbled, looking at the scene in front of him. God, she prayed the child didn’t get his idiotism. He can’t be fucking serious.

“Hold my goddamn hand and tell me it is going to be ok because I am in a lot of pain,” she said, taking her one hand out and grabbing his. Harry pushed a chair beside her and held her. His bones were definitely getting broken due to her crushing them.

Arlo Rowan Styles was born. After fourteen hours in labour, he came and both parents were filled with joy.

She witnessed him cry, as he held him for the first time. He loved him so much, maybe more than how much Y/N loved him as well. Both parents forgot all the tension and worry when his cries filled the room and his body was laid on her chest.

He was absolutely beautiful with her eyes and his nose. Arlo’s little finger wrapped around his and he cried. He was perfect.

Harry may be an asshole to her, but the first few minutes of watching him interact with their child changed her perspective. They weren’t good together, but they needed to set their differences aside in order to be a parent to him.

“I may have overreacted,” she mumbled, as she watched him sleep. To Harry, she was still beautiful, dressed in her hospital gown, hair frizzy and in a mess and sweat dried on her face. “We need to set our issues aside. I am mad at you still for a lot of things. However, we need to be mature because of our baby. You can stay with us for a while until I kick you out or can come and go as you please. We aren’t getting back together, H. I am sorry, we aren’t good together. I have the custody agreement set up. He will need me for a while, but when he doesn’t as much, we can put something in place. Just don’t hover, be kind, don’t control me and please be the best goddamn dad. Ok?” he nodded, thumbing the baby’s cheek.

“I know that I have haven’t really been too good to you, but still love you, you know that right?”

“I know.”

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bri206 · 6 years

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4:59

The stress had finally taken over her. Her doctor had warned her that stress would cause problems. But she didn’t listen and continued to participate in her heavily stressed out job. And now she is laying in a hospital bed groggily trying to remember how she even got there, and then it all came rushing back, like a bad nightmare.

Everything started out great, a drug deal was going down at the docks and Oliver and John had gone down there to take care of it. No problem, and everything went down smoothly, but it was after they came back that things got dicey.

When Oliver and John returned from the back, after taking showers and changing, they had found Felicity had fallen asleep.

The way her body angled over the keyboard caused Oliver pain just thinking about the uncomfortable position. Sighing he knelt down to his knees.

“Felicity” he whispered.

When she didn’t stir, he started softly caressing her hair, which caused her to slowly wake from her slumber.

“Hmm” she muttered.

“It’s time to go home my love.”

“I don’t wanna move” she said still half asleep.

At 8 months pregnant, Felicity’s energy was nonexistent, and once she was down, she was down.

They were about to call it a night when her computers went haywire. All seven of her alerts that she set for their new villain finally went off after two weeks of dormancy.

“Shaw”

Typing furiously, she finally landed a location.

“Where is he?”

“In an old abandoned house on the outskirts of the city.”

“Alright” he says already moving back to his suit.

After quickly getting the suit back on, he heads to the landing when he hears Felicity.

“Umm, guys.”

“What is it?” Oliver asks coming to stand beside her.

“I found the list of all the missile codes he stole from Argus and the FBI.”

“That’s great”

“What’s not great is that I can’t access and terminate the file, without being on site.” “No!”

“Oliver-“

“I said no. You are not going anywhere near him.”

“Oliver this may be our only chance to stop him from destroying everything. I mean you saw the plans. He’s practically going to start World War III. From his sites set on Russia and China, to Canada to London. Oliver, we save the world, and if saving the world looks like me terminating missile codes in the back of a van, then so be it.” “Felicity” he half begged. “Please”

“I won’t leave the van. I promise.” Giving him her most sincere look, he sighs in defeat. Knowing she won this argument, she gathers everything she needs. “We have to leave now, there’s no telling when I’ll lose the connection, and we won’t be able to get a chance like this again.”

The first signs that things weren’t going to go well, was the uneasy feeling in her stomach. The nerves ate away at her as the time passed by and the closer they got to the house. Knowing that if she failed, everything would be in absolute chaos did nothing but put her in an a near panic attack, but again, she just pushed it down. That was her first mistake.

When they arrived, Oliver and Digg went over the plan one more time and quickly began to execute it. Before he left, Oliver turned from the open door and looked his wife in the eye.

“Don’t you dare leave this van. I mean it Felicity.” “I won’t, I promise. I promise it on our baby’s life.”

Knowing those words were the deepest promise either could make to each other, Oliver nodded once and left.

The second sign to her was the distress kicks and cramps, but with her body pushing everything into full on fight or flight mode, Felicity let the pain egg her on.

After about 10 minutes, everything went from bad to worse. Oliver and Digg had found the man and he had an army and quite the fight in him. While they were trying to stay on top inside, Felicity was having better luck outside.

Everything was going well when she finally hacked into the server and got a hold of the codes.

“I got them.”

“Good now destroy them” Oliver said over the comms.

“Already ahead of you” she mutters under her breath.

And with one final tap to the enter key, the file was permanently gone.

“Alright, it’s no more.”

All of a sudden, the comms went off resulting in a white noise over the speaker.

“Oliver?”

No response.

“Oliver?”

Without warning the van was opened un-ceremonially and everything went black.

When she opened hey eyes, everything was fuzzy at first but her sense of touch notified her that she was tied to a chair. Everything began to clear up moments later and she quickly noticed that Oliver and John were hanging from the ceiling. How he managed to do that, she will never know.

“Oh, good you’re awake. You and I have some business we need to hash out before the other’s wake up. First of all, I don’t appreciate you frying my system and destroying the missile codes.”

“Yeah, well you are the bad guy.”

‘Careful Felicity’ her conscious was yelling at her.

He gives her a humorless chuckle.

“You have quips. Now I understand why everyone loves you. The badass business woman by day, taking down terrorists by night. Quite the catchy life if you ask me.” “Well it’s a good thing I wasn’t asking then.”

‘FELICITY’ she internally screamed at herself. Usually she was fine in situations like this; she could keep her emotions in check. But that bad feeling she had at the beginning of the night reached maximum capacity and she just knew something unforgettably bad was about to happen to her.

“You know, I had a plan B & C and somehow you managed to ruin those too and you’re gonna pay.”

As he’s declaring his threat, two things happened. Oliver woke up and Shaw walked towards her while simultaneously pulling out his gun.

Felicity’s breathing was growing quicker and quicker and her heart was hammering in her chest so hard she knew it would fall out any moment. But the thing that scared her the most, was the way her baby was kicking at her stomach. The kicks were hard and it almost felt like the baby was trying to claw their way out. And it was in that moment that she knew in her bones, that she would never meet her baby.

The look in Shaw’s eyes was murderous. She never saw herself going out this way, especially when another life was literally relying on her. And she knew that if she died right this second, she would never forgive herself for letting this baby die with her. But deep down she knew she had to make peace with her demons because soon it wouldn’t matter.

“FELICITY” Oliver was screaming as Shaw got closer and closer to her.

She couldn’t see the look of anguish on his face because her eyes were closed, as she slowly prepared herself for her demise. Wanting it to be as painless as possible for her baby’s sake, she mentally sent a prayer to any God who would listen.

Shaw stopped inches from her and held the gun to her temple.

“You know it’s such a shame, because I have a real soft spot for women and children.”

“Says the same man who was going to nuke multiple countries filled with women and children.”

“But for you, I’ll make an exception.”

As he begins to cock the gun, Oliver breaks the chain holding him to the ceiling and quicker than he has ever picked up and nocked an arrow, he aims and shoots without so much as a thought.

Taking what she thinks is her final breath, Felicity squeezes her eyes shut and awaits the pain. But it never comes. Instead a chocking sound erupts from above her. Opening her eyes, she sees the arrowhead bright red with blood, pointing out directly from his heart.

The gun clatters to the ground and so does his body. When she looks up to Oliver’s face for the first time, she sees the fury raging in his eyes, but it quickly dissipates when he sees her.

“Felicity” he says in a whispered cry, as he runs and kneels down to get her out of her binds.

Not really processing, Felicity can’t hear anything. She imagines this is what it feels like when someone at war has that defining moment that would haunt their dreams forever. She doesn’t even register the roughness of his hands when they come into contact with her cheek. Instead the only thing keeping her conscious of her body, is the feeling of her baby going still.

“No” she whispers so low that it’s the only thing she can hear. And without warning, her body shuts down and goes limp into Oliver’s arms.

The first thing she realized when she became attuned with her body, was the absence of weight on her stomach. Her hands immediately went to the now flat and soft surface of her belly. The next thing she noticed was the big scar that hurt like hell.

“What? My baby?”

When she turns, it is the first time she notices she’s not alone. Oliver was sitting beside her, with his hands in his lap, like a scared little boy afraid of touching anything. His eyes were glazed over and he was avoiding eye contact with her, and she had no idea why. This was not Oliver.

“Oliver?”

Nothing, he acts as if she weren’t even here. “Oliver? Where’s my baby?”

At the last word, his eyes slowly ascend up until they meet hers.

She doesn’t like the look he’s giving her one bit. It is a look of shock, anguish, and unbearable heartbreak.

“Oliver? Wher-e’s my baby?” she full on cries out.

And when she thinks that he’s going to answer her this time, she is very wrong. Instead his reaction is one she’s never seen in her 8 years of knowing this man. The strongest man she has ever known, was bawling right in front of her.

His cries were pure agony to her ears. The tears were overlapping one another as they left streak after streak upon his tan cheeks.

And all the pent up emotion she had been holding in all night caught up to her as she watched her husband suffer through his pain, and she felt the beginning of her own endless waterfall begin to make its descent.

“Oliver?”

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. She- she didn’t make it.”

And to think she couldn’t have been broken anymore than she was when she was sitting in that chair awaiting her death, she was wrong. Four little words, absolutely obliterated her.

“She?” she whispered in disbelief.

Oliver simply nods.

And surprising herself, the most inhumane scream fell from her lips, as her heart shattered into a million tiny little pieces. She lost her baby.

As she sobbed into her hands, she slowly felt Oliver engulf her into his arms. They stayed like that for what felt like forever, but was simply a couple minutes, before she lifted her head from his chest.

“What happened?”

“After you fainted, John and I rushed you here to the hospital, and they immediately took you into an emergency C-Section. They were so worried because your body literally shut down and they were afraid that if you didn’t wake up soon the baby would die, so they delivered her.”

“And?”

“And she was fine… Until they delivered her. I snuck into the room to make sure were ok, and they were giving her CPR.”

What he wasn’t telling her was that when he saw Doctor Schwartz giving his baby CPR and the look of worry on her face, his life was slowly crumbling. That when he heard Dr. Schwartz sigh in defeat with her head hung low, his body went into shock. But the moment that truly broke him was when the words “Time of death 4:59” came out of her mouth and her look of sorrow when she said “I am so sorry I couldn’t save your daughter Oliver. I am so sorry.”

He has suffered through a lot of death in his life time. More than a person should go through in ten lifetimes, but out of all the deaths, this one had to be the hardest.

“I want to see her. No. I NEED to see her.”

“Felicity”

“Please. I just need to see my baby.”

After a moment of silence, he grabs her call button and pushes it. A few minutes later, a nurse walks in.

“Mrs. Queen welcome back.”

“I wanna see my baby.”

Without a word, the nurse ducks out of the room and comes back five minutes later with Dr. Schwartz rolling a bassinette. Finally stopping in front of the bed, she hesitates before picking up the lifeless baby and slowly handing her to her mother.

When Felicity makes contact with her daughter, she feels like coming home. She feels like everything was complete, except it wasn’t because if it were, she would be crying and looking at her with big eyes.

But that was not the case, instead she was pressed against her chest right on her heart, motionless. Looking down at the greyish blue tinted skin, Felicity couldn’t help but feel a whole new kind of heartbreak. She didn’t just lose her baby that she never met, but she was saying goodbye to her heart and soul.

Pulling her tight, she ducked her head into the little puff of blonde hair and sobbed. All while this was going on, Oliver watched every move and felt the pain become worse and worse as time went on. Finally he took Felicity back into his arms and let his hand rest atop his daughter’s body. And the family just cried.

Looking over to the window Dr. Schwartz saw the beginning of a new day, as the sun began to make it’ s presence. As it made it’s way into the hospital room, it almost seemed as if it were on a mission. It traveled through the white floor, to the chairs, to the bed, and then finally landed over Felicity, like a warm blanket. But Felicity didn’t feel the warmth, but someone else did.

What happened next would overtake any shocking discovery he ever made. A man running as fast as lightning; time travel; aliens; and multiple Earth’s.

After moments under the ray of sun, right before her eyes, Dr. Schwartz started to see a change in the baby girl, her skin was no longer greyish blue, but a soft pink.

” Felicity” she whispered.

And without having to say another word, the sound of a baby’s cries filled the room. Looking down, Oliver and Felicity saw their daughter squirming and clutching tightly to her gown. She was alive.

Her cries were music to their ears, and briefly making eye contact with each other new tears formed from their eyes but this time, they were tears of joy.

From that day forward, they would never understand what brought back their daughter, but whatever it was, they were forever grateful.

They named her ‘Ada Hope Queen’ and would cherish every second of every day of her life. That included William too, who was just as thrilled when he met the miracle baby.

While her life didn’t start out good, it definitely would be lived out extremely well. She was loved, so loved and no one would ever be able to take that away.

@candykizzes24 @wherethereissmoak @ao3feed-oliverfelicity @almondblossomme @dreamalongwithamy @smkkbert

#Olicity #oliver queen/felicity smoak #Felicity Smoak #oliver queen #angst #ao3feed #A03 #a03 link #a03 fic #olicity baby #sad

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tripstations · 5 years

Text

Cockle fishing and mud baths — locals show you the real Thailand

Bangkok (CNN) — With its talcum powder-soft, white sand beaches, turquoise sea and exquisite food, Thailand is at the top of many a holiday wishlist.

The fourth most popular holiday destination in the world, the country received a record 38.3 million tourists in 2018 and collected $62 billion in tourism revenue.

Thailand is holiday heaven.

Andrew Watson/Getty Images

But how many of those visitors get the authentic experience of daily life in the country?

In 2012 Somsak Boonsam established Local Alike, a company which promotes “community-based tourism.” Via its online platform, Local Alike offers tourists the chance to leave the resorts and visit over 100 communities, from hill tribes to fishing villages.

His aim is to address the current inequality by generating employment and funneling tourism dollars “to the people who need it most,” while giving tourists the chance to “have new experiences and make personal connections with local people.”

CNN set out to visit three Local Alike community guides and hear their stories.

Spirit of the slum

Tour guide Chan Kaithong.

Sarah Lazarus/CNN

Chan Kaithong lives in Bangkok’s largest slum. Near the city’s port, but just a stone’s throw from luxury shopping malls and hotels, the Khlong Toei district is home to 100,000 people.

The slum has a terrible reputation. A project sponsored by the United Nations Drug Control Programme in 2000 reported that Khlong Toei is “likely the most developed drug market in Bangkok.” Kaithong says many “external” Bangkok residents are too scared to enter and taxi drivers sometimes refuse to ferry passengers in.

But, she says, the drug problem has vastly improved since the government installed CCTV and started arresting sellers and providing treatment for addicts.

In Khlong Toei, some elderly residents volunteer as street sweepers to help keep their neighborhood clean.

Sarah Lazarus/CNN

Kaithong has spent her whole life living in the district. Like all the other houses in the 1970s, her one-room childhood home was made of wood. Fires were a frequent hazard, she says, and since then, most wooden houses have been replaced by brick and cement constructions — each measuring a tiny 20 feet by 13 feet.

Despite their straitened circumstances, many of Khlong Toei’s residents are hard-working, says Kaithong. While showing tourists around the slum’s ramshackle alleyways, she takes them to visit carpenters who buy cheap pallets from the port and upcycle them to make wooden furniture. Visitors also eat lunch at a local restaurant and try their hand at making flower garlands — one of the slum’s cottage industries. “It’s perfectly safe for tourists in the daytime,” she says.

Kaithong says she loves her community and applauds the spirit of residents who are striving for a better life. Some have managed to break the cycle of poverty by sending their children to university, while others volunteer to clean the streets.

“I’m very proud of where I come from.”

Warms the cockles

Uncle Sorn.

Sarah Lazarus/CNN

Technically, Sorn Phuengsai — known to everyone as Uncle Sorn — lives within Bangkok’s boundary, but his village feels so far removed from the crowded, noisy city, that you would never guess. Three miles from the sea, his house in Santor lies on a network of saltwater canals lined by mangrove trees and fishermen’s homes. There are no streets here — all travel is by boat.

At the age of 76, Uncle Sorn is stooped and moves slowly, but he holds down two jobs — as a cockle and prawn farmer, and a tour guide.

Uncle Sorn’s farm is on the outskirts of Bangkok but it feels like a world away from the hustle and bustle of the city.

Sarah Lazarus/CNN

Uncle Sorn says that although he rebuilt the house, he has lived on the same plot of land for his whole life. The youngest of seven children, he was adopted by his aunt who was single and childless. On leaving school at 12 he went to work, helping his aunt to run her salt farm.

Uncle Sorn explains that the ridges on a cockle’s shell reveal its age. The shell gains one ridge a month, so this cockle has just celebrated its first birthday.

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The pair filled the ponds at the back of the house with seawater, waited for the water to evaporate, and mined the salt left behind. “It was very dry and dusty,” Sorn recalls. “When I was young, my face was always dirty.”

When the profits from salt farming dried up, Sorn reinvented his business as a prawn and cockle farm which, he says, was “much more successful.” It’s hard work though — Sorn collects small cockles from the sea, transfers them to his ponds, waits 8 months for them to grow and then scoops them out of the water by hand, to sell to traders. He has to keep a constant lookout for predatory snails which try to prize their way into cockles’ tightly sealed shells and eat them.

Tourists have no problem catching cockles, but most of the prawns get away.

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Tourists — who visit for the day to relax, enjoy a seafood lunch and try their hand at shellfish farming — have no problem catching the cockles, which swim free in the water, but the prawns are another matter: “They are so fast,” says Uncle Sorn. “And they jump!”

Mud, mud, glorious mud

Thaksin Minman (left) and Fud Himma (right) demonstrate the mud beauty treatment.

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When Thaksin Minman was 40, his wife died. With four children to raise, and desperate for money, the former motorcycle taxi operator resorted to dealing drugs.

Shunned by the local community in Baan Laem, a fishing village on the east coast of southern Thailand, Minman hit rock bottom when he was arrested. A policeman admonished him, saying that by selling drugs to teenagers, he was destroying the future of the country.

“Those words changed my life forever,” he says.

Minman decided to clean up his act by pursuing a tourism venture, but friends and relatives just laughed at him. “Nobody believed in me,” he says.

In 2012, his luck changed when he met Fud Himma — who jumped on board without hesitation. As business partners the two men complement each other — Minman is excitable and candid; Himma is quieter and more self-contained. “He’s better than me in every way,” says Minman, “but he never disagrees with me. He’s my moral support.”

The pair’s mission is to lift the whole community out of poverty. To do that, they have devoted themselves to sustainable living.

Untangling fishing nets.

Sarah Lazarus/CNN

The first step was to persuade locals to stop chopping down mangrove trees for use in construction. The mangroves are a breeding ground for crabs — the village’s main source of income — and they bring in tourists. They also asked the fishing boats to donate a pregnant crab or two from each haul, explains Himma.

The crabs are kept in a tank — safe from fishing nets — until they are ready to spawn. Visiting tourists then help return the crabs to the sea, and also plant mangrove cuttings.

Buoyed by the success of this project, Minman started casting around for new ideas. Three years ago, he was struck by one — literally.

“After planting mangroves, I took tourists to wash in the sea,” he says. Rather than getting clean, the group scooped up mud from the sea floor and threw it at each other. Wading into battle, Minman offered his face as a target. “When I washed the mud off later, I noticed how soft my skin felt,” he says.

This pregnant crab — with a cluster of eggs underneath — is about to be returned to the sea.

Sarah Lazarus/CNN

Laboratory analysis revealed that the creamy, gray-blue mud is rich in minerals, including silicon, that benefit skin and hair. The “natural spa experience,” that Minman and Himma now offer, has proved so popular that they have launched their own line of mud-based beauty products, including soap, a face mask and a hair treatment.

As tourists have flocked to Baan Laem, homestays have cropped up around the village, transforming the fortunes of locals. Minman says he feels immensely proud of his achievements — “nobody ignores me anymore.”

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hisalpha17-blog · 7 years

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Growing up

When I was growing up I didn't have it as easy as the world thought I did. I am able to bury emotions and smile in your face while I am dying on the inside. I never had someone that was there through everything and stuck by my side that helped me through the years. Everyone I ever got close to always seemed to pass to the next life. At 1 years old I lost my grandmother. And I know I was so young i probably don't remember it or her and you'd be correct. I don't remember her at all but that with everything else just makes it worse. After my grandmother died he youngest daughter my aunt came to live with us. She ran away to get away from my mom when I was 6. At 6 years old I started taking care of my 2 younger brothers. I made sure their homework was done, that they are and got baths, that they got to school on time and anything else they needed me to do. It was all on me at such a young age. I still remember having to climb onto the counter so I could reach to make dinner then to clean up the kitchen. If everything wasn't done I would get into trouble with my mom. I either got beat, grounded, or even worse.... both. I tried making sure everything got done and that I kept my grades up so on the weekends I could go to my other grandmother's house. I would feel so guilty because I don't know who took care of my brothers while I was gone but I need down time to just care about myself. She was my rock and when she found out what was happening she called cps on my mom. When my mom confronted her she admitted it and I lost my grandma my mom said it was my fault because I couldn't keep our business to myself the next time I saw my grandma was on her death bed quite literally she died of cancer in August of 2000. But that couldn't be the end could it. Never. So we found out I had depression with psychosis meaning I hear things. My depression got so bad. I started doing bad in school and not caring if of my mom beat me. I got put into a counseling at school it was a 3 month program and I finally started to come out. I graduated the program. The next week just made all that progress for nothing. My uncle who had stayed by me through the death of my grandma and tried helping even when I pushed him away was killed. He was supposed to be on his way to have pizza with me. I remember being so mad because he never showed up. When I got up the next morning, late for school, I thought my mother was going to flip instead my dad (who never knew what my mom did because he worked very long hours to provide for us kids so we never had to worry about food or shelter. He was an amazing man. When he did finally find out he told us we should of told him. We would of taken us and left.) Was there and said I wasn't going to school and broke the news to me. I locked myself in my room and for 3 days played nsync (Jerry used to dance to it) non-stop. I felt like I was dying. I had got expelled from the last month of school so my mother's step dad offered to take me to New York to get me away and maybe it would help. Little did we all know it just made my entire life so much worse. In April of 2001 I went to New York and was raped repeatedly for a week by my step grandfather. There was nothing I could do. There was no one I could go to for support or help. It was my fault. When I returned home my grade straightened up and I abide by all my mother's rules just so that I'd never have to spend time with him again. Later that year he remarried and moved away and I never saw him again. I started dating multiple guys just trying to cover the pain and hurt I felt. I got sexually active with every guy I was with. I never took the time explore my sexuality or anything I just threw myself in relationship after relationship never being happy just numbing myself. In the next year's I lost another uncle, my best friend was murdered (guy at school beat her she was in hspiral and died from a blood clot), and my baby cousin died of S.I.D.S. My mother was abusive through it all she wasn't just hitting on me anymore and even though I tried taking the brute of it she was pretty ruthless through it all. My brother has a medical condition and she continuously hit him in a sensitive spot for his conditions. My sophomore year of high school we had to move. My parents had gotten on the wrong side of some very bad people. We started over in a new town, new city, new state. It was horrible. I met some new people and found friends fairly quickly. I got involved with an abusive controlling bf who I was with for 5 years on and off. Everytime I let him back in he just repeated it all over again. I was done taking the abusive from every which way between my mom and him I just wantednout so I saved my money. Lunch, babysitting, anything I got I saved. I got enough for a bus ticket back to where we came from. I was going to go stay with my uncle and get emancipated and take custody of my brothers. However my controlling bf found out told my mother and well it created a scene. I went and my dad got there first he took me back to school. So I hit a friend from gym class up who was a senior to give me a ride and well went back to the station. My mother was there and she jerked me by my arm and I stood my ground so she had me arrested the cops said they could book me or send me home and I said I would just leave again so the took me downtown. Well I went to juice and the judge asked after a month if I would like to go home and I refused. I was eating 3 meals a day, doing my school work and wasn't getting beaten or into trouble I wanted to stay. After another month of good behavior though the judge sent me home. So what did I do? I rebelled. I dated a guy I knew parents hated and didn't want me near. And I ended up pregnant with my daughter (who is now 8) my mother had a fit when she found out. Beat me within an inch of my life but that didn't effect me anymore. The day I turned 18 I joined the Navy. I had to sign temporary custody to my parents so I could join. However the agreement was I get my baby back when I finished boot camp... go figure my mother refused. Had to battle it out in court. My own mother fought me for custody over and over again for my child. I won and received my custody back August 8, 2012. Then to top off all my mother's horrible actions she killed my daddy February 25, 2013. He had be hurt at work and received strong pain meds. The day he died, I had given him his medication at 1330 right before I went to work. He was to receive it every 6- 8 hours my mother gave him another does at 1730 qhennshe got home and one before he went to bed. When the police arrived she told them that she had given him 1 dose and that's all he had because ahe had his medication with her at her work with her. I thought it was weird she lied but when I mentioned it to the police they said maybe I was mistaken or maybe she was confused because of what had just happened. They never even investigated. It was ruled as an accidental overdose. His system had 3 times the normal amount of the medication and his heart was 4 times its original size. She got away with murder. She started sleeping with people too soon after he died to even make it look like anything else. She slept with my brothers wife's father who was my dad's best friend. Then she got with a boy who is 3 years older than me who jumped me with my daughter in my arms and is a convicted felon. She lost it and when my family moved across country to get away she fought me for only my daughter saying I was unfit even though I had 4 children at the point. The judge denied it saying if I was unfit she would fight me for all of the kids. So life has gotten better since being here. I am going through a divorce which started off Rocky however we get along now. In fact he lives in my spare bedroom in the same house as me and my fiancé. My mother hasn't changed she is still trying to fight my for only my daughter. I have 5 beautiful children and I found my soulmate in my fiancé. He is my everything he knows what ice been through and he is helping me find myself. He was there qhen I needed him the most. Last year, Sept. 2016 I had a little girl that only lived for 5 minutes. I got to be the first and last thing my little angel saw. It was one of the hardest moments of my life. The next day I met him. We started talking just as friends. He knew my situation and asked to take me on a date. And from there we have only grew. We are closer than ever and he doesn't judge me. He tells me I'm valid having the feelings I have. I don't care about what someone's sex is I fell for him before I knew he was transgender pre- op and surprised him when it didn't bother me. I loved him for him and that's all that matters. I don't care what part a person has as long as they are a good person and love me back. 10.01.16

#my life #growing up #abusive mother #abusive ex #teen pregnancy #rising above #college graduate #married #divorce #engaged #transgender #pansexual #doing better for my kids #death #5 babies #mommylife #rape survivor

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