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#nct kim doyoung x reader
ppumeonae-bigvibe · 11 months
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“erase your doubts.”
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pairing: bf! doyoung x gn! reader ↬ tags: non-idol/ idol! au, mentions about being anxious
summary: when your intrusive thoughts get loud, doyoung is here to tamp them down word count: 353 words
a/n: as an overthinker, i tend to also feel anxious or upset when peace is disturbed (when vibes from responses are off, when someone acts distant) and i start overthinking the worse things possible, especially in relationships; 
for those who just trails off into never-ending thoughts and need a comforting word: your burdens are not for you to shoulder
update; an anon corrected me so ive removed the tag to prevent further confusion ,, you can read their response to my fic here for clarification
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“doie. i’ve got a question.” 
“uh huh?” doyoung raised an eyebrow at your inquisitive tone, but made no actual move to look up at you. you were sat across him on the couch, the two of you relaxing in comfortable silence. 
“what if…i became a worm?” 
“then i’d become a worm too, and we can live a worm-y life together. We could roll in the grass and bask in the sunlight, together.” he took your silence as satisfaction, and proceeded to lean against the backrest. “that’s a funny question you got there. this isn’t some sort of test right?”
“no! it’s just a random question. then…what if we broke up?” 
doyoung gently put his phone down on his lap, gazing at you with those eyes you’ve come to love, “that’s not happening. i love you so much that breaking up with you is out of the question. but if that is your wish, then i will appreciate the times we had together, and wish you all the best.” 
doyoung frowned, not enjoying the idea of being apart from you, “don’t think of breaking up with me though. i’m gonna be so mad. come here you dummy, i’m not letting you go.” 
wordlessly you crawled into his embrace, lying down so that your back was on his front and you were sitting in the space created by his legs. 
“doie, do you love me?” 
“of course i do.” he answered readily, “you were the unexpected love that i never thought i’d encounter. now that i have you, you’re all that i ever wanted and i wouldn’t trade this relationship for anything else in the world.” 
“but what if—” 
“where are all these questions coming from, hmm?” doyoung lightly chided you, hands coming around your waist to hold you. 
you felt your face heat up and you quickly hid your burning cheeks behind your hands, “sorry. that was just my anxiousness speaking.” 
as he peppered kisses on the exposed part of your neck, he promised, “erase your doubts. i’m here with you now. your intrusive thoughts have no hold on you. you’re with me now, alright?” 
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@ppumeonae-bigvibe 's work ; likes and reblogs are appreciated <3
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multifandomslxt · 1 month
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Quiet Rage
MDNI
MINORS GO AWAY
Pairing: bsf!Johnny x reader
Synopsis: You wanted to test a theory and ended up making Johnny "Quiet Rage" Suh pissed all the way off. Surely he wouldn't take it out on you though right? after all, you were his best friend.
WARNING: THIS IS SMUT...arguably one of my dirtiest yet. reader is a little shit and Johnny is the quiet guy in the friend group. Johnny in glasses. Dirty and I mean DIRTY talk. spit, sweat, mentions of bruising skin, drooling, overstimulation, exhibitionism via video call, just dirty stuff alright
A/N: This took forever to get out and I apologize for that. it's exam season and I really wanted this out so I pulled some all-nighters. so I apologize for the grammatical errors and so on. I'm very very nervous about this because I did not expect the teaser to get that much attention. but anyway, enjoyyy. @neoculturecollectives @calibabii21
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"I swear, Johnny's into you," your girlfriend claims, and you almost spit out your latte. You shoot her a look, throat burning, and coffee dribbling down your chin. "What the hell makes you say that?"
She rolls her eyes, handing you a napkin. "Come on, babe. The guy gives you that intense stare all the time."
You stare at her in disbelief. "He gives everyone that stare. It's just Johnny."
She grunts in frustration. "Y/n, he calls you 'baby' for crying out loud."
You shrug, trying to play it cool. "So? It's not like it's some romantic declaration."
This scenario is all too familiar, and it annoys you. People always misread Johnny and you, trying to turn your perfectly platonic relationship into something more.
"Alright, if you're so confident, come with me to Jay's party tonight," she challenges.
Your heart sinks.
Jay, aka Jaehyun, is her boyfriend, and you've crossed paths quite a bit. But you already know you can't go.
"He doesn't like you like that, right? So let's settle it, Y/n. Let's end the speculation."
"That's dumb. I don't need to prove anything," you argue. But truth be told, your heart is still doing somersaults. You both know why you won't go, or rather, can't.
Johnny has this strict no-party rule for you. Sounds stupid, but it's his way of keeping you safe. One bad experience with some idiot led to this.
"Come on, just this once, and I'll drop it, promise," she pleads.
"Fine" you reply, already feeling your energy drain.
~
You find yourselves in what's supposed to be Jay's living room turned dance floor.
"Where's that man?" your friend complains beside you.
You hadn't been paying much attention to her anyway. Tonight, you're on a mission to prove a point. Yep, you're scanning for Johnny.
"Yo, ladies!" A familiar voice greets you from behind.
It's Mark. Awkward, cute, and definitely on some kind of high.
weed probably
"Markieee." you smiled and hugged him.
"Have you seen Jay?" your friend asks, not even bothering to greet Mark.
"In the upstairs bathroom," Mark replies, the thumping bass of the music echoing through the house.
"Thanks, y/n, call me if you need me," she says, her voice almost drowned out by the distant laughter and chatter.
"Okay," you agree, even though you know she's most likely going to be too busy to pick up. With that, she confidently stalks off into the lively chaos to find her man.
You're still hugging Mark throughout that, the music's pulsating rhythm vibrating through your bodies, and neither of you makes a move to release the other.
"Markie, how high are you right now?" you ask, half amused and half concerned, the scent of various substances hanging in the air.
"I'm not high," he insists, his words slightly slurred.
Yep, he's as high as a damn kite. "Alright, let's get you seated," you decide, guiding him through the animated crowd.
You hug him a little tighter to your side as you maneuver through the sea of people, completely unaware that the man you had been scanning for was silently observing you from across the dimly lit room.
Johnny tilts his head ever so slightly, the ambient lights flickering, casting enigmatic shadows on his intense expression as he observes you cradling the nearly unconscious Mark in your arms.
"Yo, Johnny! Where you goin'?" Heachan's voice echoes from the kitchen, where the clinking of glasses and laughter weave through the air.
"You can't bail on me now, man. You promised to try this strain with me," Hexhan pleads, his tone a mix of whining and cajoling.
"Another time," Johnny responds tersely, striding away without a backward glance.
Johnny can't fathom any sober reason for Mark to be draped over you like that.
"And you shouldn't even be here," Johnny muses to himself.
"Y/n," his gruff voice calls out, a single word that carries volumes.
You pivot, finding yourself face to face with your long-time best friend, a man whose relationship with you blurs between suspected boyfriend, occasional fling, or perhaps something more permanent.
His towering figure looms over you like an impending storm, his mouth contorted in a sneer, eyebrows knitted in displeasure. A quick appraisal reveals he's opted for a relaxed ensemble tonight—black hoodie and grey joggers, his signature black rimmed glasses resting on his nose.
"Johnny, I've been looking for you. Where the hell were y--"
"Y/n, have I ever told you that your tits make the best pillows ever? Oh my god," Mark interjects, completely oblivious to Johnny's presence.
In one swift motion, Johnny shoves Mark away, causing him to collide with people behind you.
"Johnny, what the fuck!" you gasp, caught off guard.
"What are you doing here, Y/n? I'm only asking once," Johnny demands, his hand firmly gripping the back of your neck, forcefully pulling you into the shelter of his chest.
"Answer the question."
"I'm here for you," you assert, making no attempt to deceive.
"You could've called me if you missed me so much, baby," he responds, his voice softening, and his eyebrows gradually easing.
"Yeah, I know, but I wanted to have fun too," you argue.
It becomes apparent that you've made the wrong choice as his hand tightens slightly around your neck.
"Have fun at home. No parties. I'm sure I told you that," his voice remains calm, but the increasing pressure on the back of your neck contradicts his demeanor.
"Go home. Now," he states, leaving no room for argument.
For a moment, your body twitches as if to comply, but it seems you're on a defiant streak tonight.
"No. I'll stay and have fun. I've seen you now, so I'll just go look for the others and enjoy myself," you declare.
He stares at you, a blank facial expression revealing nothing.
"Y/n, baby, go home," he says softly.
Successfully prying yourself from his grip, you retort, "No."
You stalk off, leaving him standing in the middle of the living room, hands straight by his sides, and his gaze unwaveringly black yet watchful.
As you navigate through the crowd, encounter familiar faces here and there.
~
You find yourself on your umpteenth shot of tequila when, unexpectedly, you're invited to a game of truth or dare, courtesy of Haechan.
Johnny is nowhere to be found, and the absence begins to stir a sense of worry and nervousness within you.
The game had unfolded over an extended period, leaving your mind increasingly hazy with each passing moment. Holding your liquor was never your forte.
You observed as the bottle spun and twirled before ultimately settling on the guy positioned beside you.
"dare" the guy simply said.
"I dare you to kiss y/n," Haechan's slurred yet mischievous voice announced.
As Haechan proclaimed his dare, Johnny ambled into the room, seemingly oblivious to your presence, it left you feeling bothered and angry.
Fine, you mused, if he's going to act that way.
Perhaps it was the influence of the alcohol coursing through your system or some other inscrutable force, but you found yourself impulsively lunging towards the guy next to you. Teeth clashed in a messy, audacious kiss, and, fueled by the audacity of the dare, you dared to explore further by delving your tongue into his mouth.
A cheer erupted from the onlookers, making your heart swell.
Basking in the attention, you pushed the boundaries, only to be abruptly seized by the neck for the second time that night, this time by none other than Johnny himself.
Without hesitation, he mused, "Go to the car and sit. I'll be there soon."
"But, Joh—"
"Go. To. The. Car, Y/n, and shut your fucking mouth. I said I'll be there soon," he asserted, his words punctuated through gritted teeth.
~
The last ten minutes had passed in utter silence as both of you sat in the car.
When Johnny finally slid into the driver's seat, his gaze never once met yours. Without a word, he started the car and left the party, only sparing you attention when he needed to secure your seatbelt.
The oppressive silence weighed on you.
"That was a fun game, wasn't it?" you ventured, attempting to break the tension.
Silence persisted.
"I bet Haechan has a video of it. Probably gonna send it to the group later," you added, attempting to inject a touch of levity into the atmosphere, though your laughter carried an undercurrent of awkwardness.
"Quit playing with me." He bites back, completely unamused by your attempt at a joke.
Your body stills as you stare wide-eyed at the man beside you. You didn't expect that from him. He wasn't the type to be so aggressive, especially with you.
"I didn't mean for that to happen, John." You said weakly. He had to understand, you were just trying to get his attention.
"But it did y/n and now I'm gonna have to show you what happens when you don't fucking listen" He rages quietly, eyes still on the road ahead.
It was always quiet with him.
little did you know.
To the untrained eye, he seemed cool and collected. But, you could tell he wasn't quite there. Maybe it was the way he squeezed the life out of the steering wheel or how he kept clenching and unclenching his jaw. Or, you know, the massive tent in his pants…
either way, you knew
somehow, you managed to piss off Johnny Suh.
"I suggest you start thinking of a way to apologize because you have no fucking idea what I have planned for you." He momentarily looks at you just long enough for you to see the dangerous glint in his eyes
~
Arriving at Johnny's apartment, you found yourself comfortably settled on his couch while he busied himself in the kitchen, fetching a glass of water for you. Since his remark on the way here, a palpable silence hung in the air.
As he approached you with the glass of water, he broke the silence, "Thought of a way to apologize yet?"
You glanced up at him from your spot on the couch. "I'm sorry. I should've listened to you," you managed to utter, your gaze dropping to the floor, a strange sense of shame washing over you.
He snorted in response, "That's all you came up with, Y/n?"
Meeting his disappointed gaze, you took a deep breath. "I should've known better," you added quietly.
He sighed, handing you the glass of water. "Drink."
Taking the glass from his hands, you started sipping as he watched you in silence. Then, without breaking eye contact, he nonchalantly remarked, "I'm going to fuck some sense into you and then fuck it out of you."
You choked on your water, hastily wiping at your mouth as you stared at him in disbelief.
"Your apology wasn't going to satisfy me anyway. I made up my mind when you said no the first time," he asserted, his tone casual yet loaded with an underlying intensity that left you flustered and strangely intrigued.
"And what if I don't want it." You daringly ask.
you knew you did.
The way he was watching you made that clear as day.
"Then say no." He shrugs
"Now finish the drink and head upstairs when you're done."he adds
and you did exactly that.
~
Johnny was a man. You knew that, he knew that, and the whole world knew that. But sometimes, it felt like you didn't always keep that obvious characteristic at the forefront of your mind, as you should have.
Entering the room, nothing struck you as special. It was the same as always: his bed in the middle of the space, surrounded by walls adorned with retro posters and pictures he had taken over the years with friends, family, and you. Despite the numerous times you had visited his home, particularly his room, it didn't feel as intimate as it did now, and for some reason, that excited you.
As you let your gaze wander, movement from the door pulled you out of your thoughts, and you turned your focus to a strangely quiet Johnny.
You both stood in silence, staring at each other for what felt like long, drawn-out minutes.
"I didn't think I'd have to tell you to strip, y/n," he said seriosusly.
You hiccup, startled. "E-excuse me?"
He stepped closer to you. "Fucking strip."
Your heart hammered in your chest at the complete unfamiliarity of the situation.
"John, you can't be seri—"
His hands fisted in your hair, causing you to tilt your head up, meeting his hard gaze. "Strip. I won't ask again. You're always free to leave, y/n, but you and I both know you don't want to."
~
"move your hand"
you twist and turn writhing your body all over his bed, hand trying to stop his fingers from fucking into you.
"Johnny, please! I said i was sorry " you scream as tears line your eyes
"I said move your fucking hand" he grabs your writs and pins the above your head
his fingers pummeling into you repeatedly. long and thick. you felt like you could feel all the ridges and callouses on them. all the fucking veins. it was torture.
SQUELCH SQUELCH
you try to squeeze your thighs together only for him to pry them back open almost immediately.
it was almost embarrassing just how wet you were really
"God. Fuck you're all over my sheets baby hmm" he moans his eyes never leaving your pussy.
almost.
that did it for you though
"Johnny, Johnny m'cumming"
“not yet baby”
you couldn't hold it
“Y/n, I said not yet” his actions contradicted his words as his fingers curled rubbing against your g spot
your body involuntarily shoots up off the bed as your lower abdomen contracts
"I can't hold it."
You cum with a high-pitched scream. Squirting all over Johnny's hand before lifelessly falling back on the bed.
you’re trying to get your breathing under control when you hear Johnny’s displeased voice
"you don't fucking listen do you"
fingers still in you, he manages to add even more pleasure relentlessly pumping into you
your legs start trembling from the intense pressure building in your abdomen once again.
Your scream is ear piercing as you cum for the fourth time
fifth...
you don't even know.
gosh, He hadn't even fucked you yet
you didn't even realize the drool running down your chin. eyes rolled back and lashes fluttering, your skin gleaming with sweat and thighs trembling. Your chest heaved as you breathed hard still coming down from your high.
In Johnny's eyes, you looked so fucked out and so fucking pretty.
He knew his version of foreplay was intense but he also knew he took it a bit further just for you.
his stubborn girl. He loved it but you needed to be taught a lesson.
with your mouth wide agape, he takes the opportunity of your oblivious state and shoves his middle and index finger down your throat causing you to gag.
"taste yourself...that's right baby suck my fingers clean" He coos as your mouth clings to his fingers.
when satisfied he pulls his away
"knees" is all he says.
you mumble uncoherent words trying to tell him you can't get up but it seems he is already way ahead of you helping you get comfortable in your position on the floor.
He begins to pull his sweatpants down revealing his erection fighting against the fabric of his black underwear. he wastes no time in pulling his cock out and you almost drool.
so harsh but so fucking pretty.
big and veiny with the prettiest pink tip. No wonder the foreplay was so intense. there was no way he was gonna fit without stretching you that much.
You look up at him with hopeful eyes. you wanted him in your mouth so fucking bad your pussy actually ached.
"So cute," he spits in the palm of his hand before bringing it down to stroke his cock.
"open and suck" He states.
Wasting no time your hands replace his and you begin to pump his pretty cock. you lick from the base of his pretty cock to the even prettier pink tip teasing him just a little with small kitten licks
"no teasing" he warns.
But of course, you don't listen continuing to push him over the edge with those kitten licks. even having the audacity to maintain eye contact while doing it.
You see the way his jaw clenches as he loses his patience and grabs the back of your head thrusting and forcing his cock to hit the back of your throat.
Your eyes widen and begin to water as you start to harshly breathe through your nose.
Gagging multiple times as he continues to relentlessly fuck your mouth
"no teasing and you continue to fucking tease huh? who's fucking in charge here y/n? Who's fucking cock's fucking your pretty mouth?"
not being able to speak you hum around his cock watching as his gaze becomes more sadistic by the second.
"Ah fuck, you're gonna make me cum like this baby?" you hum in response causing him to groan from the vibrations
"Ah, shit"
You watch his expression contort into a pained one before he somehow manages to make his cock hit even further than the back of your throat and cums in your mouth.
"Dont waste it, baby, swallow for me" he says airly
you swallowed his mouth full of cum. loving the pleasantly salty taste.
you wheezed and choked so overwhelmed with just how rough Johnny really was.
Where was this side of him hiding?
holy fuck
"your mouth, keep it open," he grumbles still heaving firm his previous orgasm.
you open your mouth a gain forming an 'O' shape and surprise takes you as he spits in your mouth before lightly slapping you across the face.
your hair was all over the place and your entire face was decorated with a mixture of precum, smudged makeup, tears, snot, and sweat
"Atta Girl." he praises you.
He helps you to your feet before giving you a quick peck on your lips
"turn around and bend over. Yeah just like that... spread your legs for me"
you used the bed as support as you got into the desired position.
he wastes no time thrusting his cock into you rough and hard.
the sound of skin slapping and the squelching of your pussy around him cause your knees to buckle as you threaten to lose your stance.
You were gonna cum soon.
feeling your swaying form, he grabs your neck pulling you into him as your back meets his chest
"don't you fucking dare" he threatens.
"Ah... please please, please! m'sorry... m'so sorry I won't do it again just please make me cum john, I'll be good I swear" you cry gasping for air between words. soon your sentences jumble into a whole lot of nothing.
he keeps his hand wrapped around your neck as he uses the other to hold your hand behind your back
"no. Cum when I say so. you need to learn to fucking listen."
snapping his hips at a quick pace.
the area around your hips already beginning to bruise from how hard he was holding you.
"t'much please johnny!" You scream as your legs begin to shake for the umpteenth time
"you can fucking take it. This is what you wanted right? To piss me off? Having mark all on you like that?" he says begrudgingly
he grabs your left breast and squeezes your nipple hard enough for your pussy to clench around him
"so damn sensitive" he whispers in awe.
he pulls out and pushes you on the bed. you look back and he's
standing over you with messy hair, dark eyes, and a cock so erect it slapped against his stomach with the slightest movement.
"get on your back and spread your legs" he says pulling your legs to the edge of the bed .
You flip over and he immediately fucks into you even harder than before.
once again your hands flay erratically as you scream trying to get away from the aching pleasure that was starting to make you see double.
"look at that baby, " he coos eyes staring at your stomach.
you look down and see his cock bulging in your lower abdomen.
You gasp at the sight
'Johnny please" you whimper not even sure what you are asking for.
"I might just fuck a baby into you. keep you home like a good little wife hmm." he says seriously, eyes still set on the bulging in your lower abdomen.
you clenched around him liking the sound of carrying his children
"you like that huh? " He groans
you nod as tears start to stream down your face.
suddenly he stops thrusting causing you to cry out
"Just gimmie a second baby gotta fix your mistake," he says as he reaches over to his nightstand picking up his phone.
"I'm calling Mark " he says nonchalantly causing your heart to race.
"you're off-limits and they fucking know that but it seems all of you need to be reminded of how things are tonight hm?"
the dial tone blares out before a muffled "hello?" comes through the speaker. Mark.
"watch " Johnny says before he thrusts into you so fucking deep you could taste him
you moan loudly
barley registering the "fucking hell, man" that comes from the phone. That was Haechan
'watch' Johnny had said earlier and you begin to understand that it was a video call.
Mark and Haechan were witnessing Johnny fuck you into oblivion.
"see this? this is my fucking pussy and nobody else can fucking have it." he fucks your relentlessly a familiar feeling building in your stomach.
"j-johnny its t'much"
"nah, you can fucking take it."
"oh, fuck! " you scream into the pillow
"my fucking pussy and she can't give it away ain't that right y/n"
"mhmm" you say not having the strength actually speak.
you cum with a shiver and a whine and even then he didn't stop
still drilling his cock into you
overstimulating you more and more
you try to get away and he never once let his cock leave you.
"tell them how many times you cum tonight." He challenges, knowing full well that you couldn't form a word much less a sentence at the moment.
you mutter random words too fucked out to think
a sharp slap to your face brings you back
"how many fucking times?" he says through clenched teeth
"Alot" you scream.
"good girl" he says before hanging up the phone and throwing it across the room.
"just give me one more" he continues.
you moan as your toes curl from the overwhelming sensations building in your stomach
with a sharp thrust, you squirt all over Johnny's cock just as he cums inside you.
"next time you do that shit I’ll fuck you right in front of them instead of over the phone."
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hrts4doie · 1 month
Text
sloppy seconds (study buddies pt. 2)
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wc: 4.7k
warnings: f!reader, threesome between you + doyoung + haechan, sub!haechan, switch!reader, dom!doyoung, cuckolding, degradation, humiliation, voyeurism, unprotected sex, cum play, breeding kink, dacryphilia, doyoung is shy at first then becomes mean, haechan gets ignored and cries a lot, everyone’s a bit perverted, haechan finds a new study buddy (sorry doyoung)
a/n: this is part 4 to me and @haetrack’s nerd!haechan series but can also be read as a standalone! our idea that finally made it out the dms can u believe it.. this is literally pure filth btw. part 3 (doyoung being added into this mess) can be read here on val’s account!
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haechan lost. he made a stupid bet, too caught up in his own pride, and he lost.
it’s not like he failed his exam. he did great, sure, but he still lost. to make things even more humiliating, he lost by one point. you consoled him, telling him that it was okay, but even then he still couldn’t shake the feeling that he messed up.
he’s jealous, the feeling eating him up inside knowing that doyoung, who was his favorite study buddy, is probably up right now, gloating in his glory and imagining everything he’s gonna do when he gets his hands on you.
if this were under normal circumstances, haechan might not have minded inviting doyoung over to have a threesome with his girlfriend. he thinks of himself as someone who’s generous, one that's willing to share if the situation was right, and he’s close enough with doyoung that it wouldn’t necessarily be weird. but this isn’t under normal circumstances and haechan’s only sharing you because he lost a bet.
for once, haechan thinks that he might actually hate life. he decides that this is all probably just some sick joke the universe decided to play on him, and unfortunately for the universe, haechan doesn’t really find it funny.
frustration heavy on his mind, haechan pulls out his phone and opens up his messages with doyoung. if he was going to even consider going through with this bet, they needed to talk.
haechan: we need 2 talk
haechan: about the bet.
doyoung: oh?
haechan: ur lucky she even agreed
doyoung: didn’t you make the bet assuming that she would already? lol
haechan: whatever. just come over tmrw and we’ll talk
haechan: [address attached]
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when doyoung comes over, it’s awkward.
you’re sitting on the couch with haechan next to you and the air in the room is tense with doyoung’s presence. he’s sitting across from you two, eyes darting around the room nervously. he realizes that in reality, meeting up with your friend to have a threesome with his girlfriend isn’t as easy as it sounds. is he supposed to look at you? make the first move? doyoung’s head hurts thinking about the situation.
it probably doesn’t help that haechan, your boyfriend, is staring hard at doyoung. you place a hand on his thigh, trying to comfort him while also trying to get him to stop.
“hi doyoung,” you greet, smiling warmly. if haechan wasn’t going to speak and doyoung was too nervous to even look at you, you had no option but to take the initiative.
doyoung falters, staring at you for a few moments before opening his mouth to respond. “hey, __,” he greets back. he gulps, nerves getting the best of him. he runs a hand through his hair, desperately trying to ignore how intensely haechan is staring at him from the corner of his eye.
“thanks for coming over to-”
“okay,” haechan cuts you off, “no more small talk!” he didn’t like the fact that you two were about to have a conversation about this without him. if he wasn’t going to get the first say, this wasn’t going to happen at all. sue him for being a bit possessive, but how else was he supposed to react knowing that right after this, doyoung was going to be fucking you? “there’s no need for,” he pauses, waving his hands around in gesture, “all this. i’m already humiliated enough, okay? let’s just get this over with.”
you side-eye him, noticing the growing blush on your boyfriend’s face. he’s embarrassed and almost as nervous as doyoung is.
“first of all, you can’t cum in her, okay? that’s.. that’s weird and she’s mine, so don’t get any stupid ideas. you should be grateful i’m even letting you touch her at all,” haechan mutters, suddenly avoiding eye contact with doyoung. this was so humiliating to talk about, especially with you right next to him.
doyoung runs a hand through his hair again, nodding. he glances at you, then haechan, then back to you. “is there anything else off limits?” he asks, his gaze subtly dropping down to your lips.
haechan catches this, huffing. “stop staring at her like that, man! you can.. you can kiss her, i guess. only if she wants! w-we’re not vanilla or anything like that, so that’s the only thing that’s off limits,” he frowns. the clarification was unnecessary, but he didn’t need doyoung getting any ideas about what their sex life was like.
“i don’t mind if you kiss me, doyoung,” you add in, squeezing haechan’s thigh. it was a warning, telling him to be nice.
“o-okay, yeah. i got it,” doyoung says, exhaling nervously. he runs a hand through his hair one more time. now that the rules were out there, it was awkward again. he still didn’t know how to approach this, his mind racing with different kinds of thoughts. he glances between you and haechan, uncertainty clear on his face.
a few moments pass and still, doyoung hasn’t moved. this only frustrates haechan because seriously? he gave doyoung the opportunity to touch his girlfriend and he wants to be nervous about it?
if doyoung won’t make a move, haechan will. he turns to you, leaning forward to kiss you. it’s rushed, messy, and bordering on desperate when he kisses you, hands immediately coming to grope at your skin. he’s eager, you can tell, trying to get doyoung to do something.
you pull away from the kiss, pushing haechan back by his chest. “s-slow down, babe,” you gasp out, just barely short of breath. he goes for your neck instead, leaving wet and sloppy kisses anywhere he can reach. you place a hand in his hair and yank him away from your neck, frowning. “you know your manners. doyoung’s our guest and we should welcome him properly.” haechan only whines at this, unhappy with the interruption.
doyoung, with his hands gripping his thighs, looks like he’s seen a ghost. this was weird and intruding on so many levels, yet he feels his dick growing harder as the seconds go by. you were so hot and he badly needed to be in haechan’s place, kissing and touching all over your body.
“come here, doyoung,” you call out to him, moving your attention away from haechan. you notice his bulge and giggle, the thought of having two men desperate to be all over you making you giddy.
doyoung gets up from his seat, slowly making his way to you as you beckon him over with a finger. with a newfound confidence and his dick doing the thinking for him, he leans down to connect his lips with yours.
kissing doyoung is different than kissing haechan, you note, closing your eyes. doyoung’s more controlling than haechan is, taking what he wants without asking. his hands cup your face, tilting your head upwards for a better angle. while haechan is pliant and submissive, letting you kiss him as you please, doyoung is demanding and forward.
you moan into the kiss when you feel his hands start to roam, touching and groping your body everywhere he can, as if trying familiarize himself with it. it’s so much and you feel dizzy from the way doyoung kisses you.
a loud whine breaks the moment and you pull away from doyoung, turning to look at haechan. he’s staring at you two, brows furrowed, and clearly upset. he wasn’t used to the attention being on somewhere other than him during sex, and quite frankly, he didn’t like it. not having your attention pains him, especially when it’s on doyoung instead of him. he may have lost a bet to him, but this? this wasn’t fair.
you shush haechan, telling him to be quiet, and ignore his whines of protest. haechan tries not to think about the way his dick twitches in his pants at the quick dismission.
doyoung, finding the whole situation amusing, laughs at how easily haechan folds because of you. his suspicions that haechan liked being pushed around in bed were true, and a fleeting thought about just how far he’ll go to please you crosses his mind. he puts a hand on your cheek, turning your face back to him and leans down to connect your lips in yet another heated kiss.
you cup doyoung through his sweatpants, feeling his bulge, and gasp into the kiss. doyoung is big, bigger than haechan, and the fact makes you smile. he breaks away, moaning against your neck as you palm him through his sweats. “fuck,” he moans, hips bucking into your hand. it’s good, overwhelmingly so, and he hasn’t even gotten to fuck you yet.
doyoung thinks that months of sad, heartwrenching sex with nobody but your ex will do that to a man. this is new, and good, and so fucking overwhelming.
“you’re so big,” you whisper into his ear, sliding your hand inside his pants and past his boxers, touching his cock. he groans at the contact, cursing once more.
“yeah?” he mumbles against your neck, grinding into your hand. “bet i’m bigger than haechan,” he adds on, “bet i’ll fuck you better than him too.”
you nod, the words making you throb in your panties.
haechan is quick to protest, frustrated with how he’s just been getting ignored. “that’s not–that’s not true!” he whines. doyoung was not going to fuck his own girlfriend better than him. it didn’t matter if his dick was bigger. he refused to let that to happen.
doyoung pushes you back against the couch, caging you in and sliding a hand down into your pants. he rubs at your clit through the fabric of your panties, making you moan.
“it is true, haechan,” he laughs, “i bet you can’t touch her properly either.” he connects your lips in another kiss, continuing his touch. you’re so wet, soaking through your panties, and it’s driving him crazy. between kisses, he asks, “he doesn’t know how to touch you the way you need it, hm? need me to do it cause he can’t?”
haechan’s humiliated hearing this, shaking his head even though neither of you are paying him any attention. this is so unfair, he thinks again. he does know how to please you and how to touch you. doyoung’s words were just stupid and untrue. what’s stupider is the way he’s so hard, cock straining against his pants while he’s watching doyoung touch you like he’s not even there.
“y-yeah,” you agree, throwing your head back with another moan, “so much better with you, doyoung, fuck.” his hand is inside your panties now, feeling your cunt and just how wet you truly are. his fingers tease along your folds before moving back to rub your clit. the touch is foreign, different than the way haechan touches you, yet you still can’t get enough of it.
haechan hates this. he hates everything about this situation and he’s embarrassed because he he likes it. he likes the humiliation and the way you two ignore him. it makes his stomach twist in unexplainable ways and his cock throbs in his pants every time you tell him to shush or to be quiet.
doyoung is kissing down your neck when you finally call haechan over, deciding to spare him just a little. he scurries to the other end of the couch, desperate for at least some kind of attention. his eyes are wide, silently begging, and he can’t help the whine that leaves his mouth as he gets closer to you.
he tries to ignore that doyoung is right there next to him, hands roaming freely inside your panties while haechan can’t even touch.
you grab him by his hair, pulling him down for a kiss. you love when he gets like this, so needy and desperate for your touch. breaking away, you ask, “you gonna be good and wait, hm? let doyoung have his turn while you sit–fuck–sit there and watch?” it’s difficult to focus with the way doyoung is touching you, his fingers hitting all the right spots.
dumbly, haechan nods. he’ll be good, he thinks, even if the image of doyoung fucking you makes him want to cry.
“good, baby,” you whisper, kissing him again. “take us to the bedroom so you can show doyoung just how good you are, okay?”
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haechan watches from the corner of the bed as doyoung peels off your shirt.
you’re laughing, amused by the way doyoung’s eyes widen as he gropes at your chest. it’s experimental and slow, not familiar like the way haechan touches you.
haechan knows he can make you feel better faster than doyoung can. doyoung’s taking his time, learning what you like, but haechan knows. he knows what gets you going and what makes you moan the loudest. it’s frustrating to watch. he wishes he could just show doyoung how much better he is, but he promised to be good.
as doyoung’s hands roam across your bare skin, haechan can only watch as he lets his palm subtly grind against his clothed clock, taking off a little bit of the edge. his cock is so hard it hurts. he wishes he were touching you instead.
doyoung’s whispering words into your ear that are too soft for haechan to hear. it’s as if he’s not even there and doyoung’s your boyfriend instead.
haechan watches as you get manhandled by doyoung, placed prettily in his lap, and watches as he spreads your legs apart. you’re on display, cunt glistening right in front of haechan’s face, and all he can do is watch. he’s staring hard at your core, zeroing in on the way doyoung’s fingers start to carefully dip inside you. he starts with two, slowly starting to pump them in and out of you.
“god, you’re beautiful,” doyoung whispers against your skin. you’re dripping, clenching hard around his fingers as he fucks you. they’re so long, reaching deep inside you and curling just right against your sweet spot. “it’s a shame haechan didn’t share you sooner,” he continues, his free hand coming up to grope at your breasts again.
“doyoung–mmh–doyoung, please,” you gasp as he starts to pick up the pace, fingers pumping in and out of you quickly. a loud squelch sounds as does, your pussy sucking his fingers in even deeper. the sound is embarrassing and it makes you flush a bright red. “d-doyoung,” you moan, throwing your head back on his shoulder and trying again.
“hm?” he hums, smiling against your neck. he’s staring right into haechan’s eyes, a mean look in his eye.
doyoung wants to humiliate haechan and show him that no matter what he does, he’s still going to be better. haechan’s girlfriend is in his lap, cunt dripping around his fingers, and moaning out his name, not haechan’s.
haechan feels stuck when he stares back at doyoung.
you’re oblivious to the silent interaction, too caught up in the way doyoung’s fingers feel inside of you to notice. you moan as he slips in a third, stretching your hole and making you feel full. suddenly, all you can think about is how badly you want his cock inside you.
“you’re so fucking wet,” doyoung groans, looking away from haechan to kiss down your neck. “it’s all for me, isn’t it? not your boyfriend?” he asks, curling his fingers inside you again. the words make you whine and nod, overwhelmed by doyoung’s words and the way he touches you.
you know haechan’s watching, pathetically palming himself through his boxers, and you can’t help but play things up a little. “w-want your cock, doyoung,” you moan, “please, i need it!”
haechan whimpers, hips bucking up into his hand. he’s ashamed, cock twitching as he realizes just how turned on he is by his girlfriend moaning another man’s name. this is so wrong, he thinks. you’ve tuned him out completely, attention purely on doyoung, and yet he’s still so turned on.
doyoung pulls his fingers out of you, wiping them on the sheets, and quickly manhandles you onto your back. you whine at the loss of his fingers, clenching around nothing. you need him to fuck you now and the wait is driving you mad.
“c’mon, fuck me already,” you whine, rolling your hips.
he laughs, moving to kneel between your legs. “yeah? need my cock that badly?” he asks, hands teasing along your thighs. “beg me for it,” he whispers, “beg for my cock and maybe i’ll give it to you.”
doyoung’s doing this on purpose and you know it. you know he wants to humiliate haechan, wants to make you beg for another man’s cock that isn’t his. you know and you like it.
“fuck me, please,” you beg, spreading your legs wider. “want your cock, doyoung. fuck me like i deserve, please.”
“that’s it, baby,” doyoung groans, spitting into his hand and slowly starting to stroke his cock. his tip is bright red and leaking from how badly he wants you. “just a little more,” he beckons, “need to know you really want it.”
haechan wishes the ground would just swallow him whole. tears are starting to well up in his eyes as he listens to you beg and he wishes you would just look at him. doyoung isn’t that good. he can’t be, haechan thinks, trying to console himself.
doyoung teases the tip of his cock against your hole, just barely pushing in.
“please, doyoung,” you try again, wrapping your legs around his waist. he’s so close yet still so far.
without warning, doyoung pushes in, bottoming out in one go. a moan rips from your throat at the sudden intrusion, his cock stuffing you full.
“look at that,” he mumbles, eyes glued to the way you’re practically sucking him in, pussy clenching hard around his cock. “so fucking tight,” doyoung groans, lightly thrusting. he’s letting you adjust, hips barely moving, and it’s still so much. you squeeze your eyes shut and whimper from how big he feels inside you.
haechan reaches inside his boxers, pulling out his neglected cock with a cry. he can’t tear his eyes away from the sight of doyoung fucking you, no matter how much he claims to hate it.
you open your eyes, turning your head to look at your boyfriend and the teary look in his eye. “d-don’t you dare touch yourself, haechan. i told you to be good,” you say, ignoring how this makes him whine even more.
you turn back to doyoung, rolling your hips and begging for him to move.
doyoung grips your waist and slowly starts to thrust inside you, his thick cock dragging against your walls. you were so tight around him, making him moan as he starts to fuck you faster. his pace is relentless as his hips snap against yours, cock sinking deeper and deeper.
“s-shit,” he groans, the lewd sound of skin slapping filling the room. “you were made to take it, weren’t you? m-made to take my cock,” doyoung grunts, glasses starting to slip off his face from how hard he was fucking you.
“oh my g-god,” you moan, pussy clenching tightly around him. you can barely think, the pleasure and doyoung’s cock inside you making you lose your mind.
doyoung slows down, stopping his thrusts completely before bringing a hand up to fix his glasses. you whine as he stops, trying to get him to move again.
he turns to look at haechan, a mean smile on his face. he gently starts to thrust inside you again, all while keeping eye contact with him. “look at this, haechan,” doyoung calls, “look at how she’s sucking me in. let’s make a bet on who fucks her better, yeah? you’ll lose that too, won’t you haechan?”
doyoung’s words are mean and haechan’s not sure he can take it. he shakes his head, trying to defend himself. “that’s not–that’s not true, doyoung,” he whines, gripping the base of his cock so he doesn’t cum. he can’t even look at doyoung anymore.
“c’mon, doyoung,” you beg, wanting him to pick up the pace, “ignore him and fuck me, please.”
doyoung turns back to you, leaning down to kiss you. he slams his hips into you, fucking you fast and hard. you moan into his mouth and wrap your arms around his neck, hole twitching around his cock as you feel yourself getting closer and closer to the edge.
his kisses trail down to your neck and his glasses are starting to fog up from how hot it is in the room. he moans against your skin every time you clench around him, thrusts starting to get more and more desperate. doyoung fucks you faster, pounding into your messy cunt as he feels himself getting close. he brings a hand down to rub your at clit in time with his thrusts, causing you to cry out.
“i’m c-close, fuck,” doyoung moans against your neck. you’re clinging onto his back, moans loud as you try to keep up with his pace. “tell me you’re close, baby,” he begs, grunting as your walls squeeze him impossibly tighter.
too overwhelmed to speak, you nod and your thighs start to shake. all it takes is one more deep thrust from doyoung before you’re cumming, shocks of pleasure washing over your body and your pussy spasming around his cock. “doyoung,” you moan out, hands flying to his hair.
“that’s it,” doyoung grunts, hips starting to lose their rhythm as he feels you cum around him. his dick twitches inside you, so close to cumming, before he quickly pulls out, leaving your hole gaping.
he sits back on his heels, quickly starting to jerk himself off. finally, he cums with a loud groan, dick twitching in his hand before he spills all over you, painting your stomach white. he’s panting, looking down at you with a dark look in his eye, almost as if he’s admiring his work.
you’re a mess, makeup smeared and hair all over the place, and it’s all because of doyoung. his cum paints your skin, and to him, it’s art.
doyoung turns to look at haechan, wanting to brag in his face. the sight is pathetic. haechan is stroking his cock, tip leaking, and all thoughts of waiting for permission to touch himself fly out the window. he just watched his girlfriend get fucked by another man and now he badly needs to cum.
coming back to your senses, you sit up against the headboard and turn your attention back to haechan. “don’t you even think about cumming, haechan. come here,” you demand, “you know what’s gonna happen if you cum without my permission.”
haechan full on sobs at this, pulling his hand away from his cock. his hips buck in the air and you hear doyoung laugh beside you, humiliating haechan even further. tears are rolling down his face as he desperately crawls across the bed to you, kneeling between your spread legs.
“l-let me touch you, please,” he begs, hiccuping. “i’ve been good, just please let me touch,” haechan goes on, babbling about how badly he needs you. his poor cock hangs heavy between his legs, neglected and leaking.
“shh,” you coo, wiping a tear from his eye. “you wanna touch me?”
haechan frantically nods, nearly knocking his glasses off his face.
“i’ll let you touch me, hyuckie,” you whisper, leaning back. “clean me up and i’ll let you touch, okay?” you ask, smiling.
haechan freezes, looking between you and the cum on your stomach. it’s doyoung’s cum that’s all over your body, not his. “clean.. clean that?”
“i thought you wanted to be good?” you ask, placing a hand in his hair and pulling his head down to your stomach. “are you gonna be good or not?”
doyoung’s eyes widen at the situation before he grins. the thought of just how far haechan will go to please you crosses his mind again.
haechan’s face crumples as he sticks out his tongue, licking up the first drop of doyoung’s cum. it’s gross, humiliating, and the taste is strange, but he wants to be good. he looks up at you, tongue traveling across your stomach as he licks up the rest of the cum.
your breath hitches as you watch him and you bite your lip, keeping a hand in his hair.
haechan whimpers as he finally licks up the last drop, a stray tear rolling down his cheek. you yank him up by his hair and connect your lips in a heated kiss. he’s needy, already forgetting about the fact that he just licked doyoung’s cum from your body and thinking only about how he needs to fuck you.
his hands are all over your body, touching anywhere and everywhere after being deprived for so long. he whines against your lips, pulling away to catch his breath.
“please let me fuck you,” he begs, too desperate to think clearly anymore. “please, baby, need to fuck you.”
you shush him, wrapping a hand around his aching cock. “you think you deserve it?” you ask, slowly starting to stroke him. haechan whimpers, hips bucking into your hand. he nods, trying not to cum on the spot.
you turn your head to doyoung who’s sitting right next to you, “should i let him?”
doyoung looks haechan up and down, taking in his pathetic state, and decides to be nice. “let him fuck you. he listened good enough, i think.”
haechan feels relief wash over him at doyoung’s answer, silently thanking him in his head. “come on, please,” he begs you again, leaning down to kiss you on the corner of your mouth. haechan thinks he might die if he doesn’t get to fuck you in the next five seconds.
you let go of his cock, spreading your legs further. “fuck me, baby. show me how much you need me.”
haechan wastes no time, grabbing the base of his cock and guiding it to your entrance, bottoming out in one thrust. he feels tears well up in his eyes again at the feeling of your warm walls around his cock. “f-fuck,” he whines, squeezing his eyes shut. being inside you is almost too much.
your hole spasms around his cock, still sensitive from the way doyoung fucked you before. “i want you to cum, hyuckie. you deserve it, don’t you think?”
haechan nods and starts to frantically snap his hips against yours, fucking you like his life depends on it. his thrusts are sloppy with no rhythm, driven purely by want and the need to cum. all he can think about is how he needs to fill you up and show doyoung that he’s the only one who can do this.
you throw your head back with a moan, caging haechan in with your legs. “t-that’s it, baby,” you praise, “cum for me.”
haechan cries out as he feels your walls tighten around him again, hips stuttering. he thrusts in one more time before finally letting go, spilling his cum deep inside you. you pull him down for another kiss, moaning into his mouth.
you pull away, caressing his face. he flops down against you, cock going soft and slipping out. his glasses are gone too, lost somewhere in the sheets and left behind in a fit of desperation. you giggle when you notice this, wrapping your arms around him.
“thank you,” he mumbles, face dropping down to hide in your neck. he’s exhausted and currently rethinking his life choices.
doyoung clears his throat, pushing his glasses up his nose. “that was.. wow,” he says stupidly, looking between you two. he’s satisfied yet suddenly feeling like he’s intruding.
you giggle, running your fingers through haechan’s hair while you look at doyoung. “i almost want to say thank you for winning,” you teasingly say to him.
doyoung, suddenly shy, bites his lip and asks, “was it.. was it good? better than haechan, i mean?”
at this, haechan whips his head up, whining. “stop! that’s not–no! i’m never making another bet with you again after this, doyoung! this was the first and the last,” he grumbles, squinting at his study mate.
you and doyoung both laugh at his words. “i was kidding,” he says, putting his hands up in surrender. “i see why you two are together. you’re…” he pauses, flashbacks of everything replaying in his mind, “let’s just say you’re good for each other?” the laugh that follows is nervous, almost like he’s not sure how to explain.
haechan decides that he’s definitely opening up applications for a new study buddy after this.
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a/n: umm.. hrts4doie first fic who else cheered!! i just want to say THAAANNNKKK YOU SOO MUCCHH to val aka @haetrack for coming up with this series with me and also helping me write parts of this!! im soooo excited to finally be posting this and completing the nerd!haechan series but i love nerd!doyoung so bad i just might write more of him. anyways i hope u guys enjoyed and lmk what u thought!!
tags: @haetrack @beidouvv
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mochidoie · 11 months
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room for two.
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kim doyoung x reader wc - 7k genre - pure fluff, sharing a bed cliché, mutuals to lovers, mutual pining, SO MUCH TENSION BUILD UP warnings - kiss scene, sensual tension, mention of alcohol
It's Johnny Suh's birthday trip and as your childhood best friend, Johnny books a hotel room with only one bed for you and Doyoung to share. The catch: you're completely head over heels for Kim Doyoung.
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“I can sleep on the floor.” Hands on his hips, Doyoung quizzically stares at the full sized bed in the center of the hotel room. Seconds pass by, feeling like hours staring at this one bed situation and trying to find a solution for the next three nights.
“Maybe we can ask if they have a spare mattress we can rent? Hotels do that right…?” If only you could be confident in your suggestions, knowing damn well that it was highly unlikely and you’ve already heard an earful of excuses as to why you’re unable to change your room last minute.
At this point, you are mentally strangling Johnny for this slip up. This is the last time you trust this man to do anything for you. Not only did he pick the middle seat for you on the airplane when you specifically asked for the window, he has now ruined your good night’s sleep by "accidentally" booking you only one bed to share with Doyoung.
Doyoung shrugs at your proposal, “it’s been awhile since I traveled. I can go down and ask if it’ll be possible. Hang tight.” He is gone before you can protest, but perhaps it’s better that he tries to negotiate with the receptionists since they wouldn’t even let you finish a sentence earlier.
Grabbing your phone, you’re quick to type an angry text to Johnny Suh about how badly he screwed up the hotel reservation and how he is getting on your last standing nerve.
Good. Maybe finally you’ll get the balls to make a move.
Plus, it was cheaper. You told me to save you some money and that’s what I did.
Scoff leaving your lips as you read the two text bubbles over and over. You can’t believe your eyes at this little weasel and in fact, you straight up cannot believe he actually thought this was a good idea.
While this means you get to share a bed with your crush, you never intended for it to be premeditated. A love that happens naturally, that is all you could ask for. Absolutely in no way did you want your friends to meddle with your love life and definitely not to put you in such an awkward situation.
The door beeps open and Doyoung walks in looking as defeated as ever. Judging from his facial expression, it was a no. You two are stuck sleeping together on this tiny bed for this entire trip.
“I really tried.” Doyoung scratches the back of his neck, quite apologetic that he couldn’t find some resolve to an issue that he didn’t even cause.
You laugh, “it wasn’t even your problem to fix anyways.” A sigh of relief follows after and Doyoung flashes you his gummy smile at the idea that pops into his head.
“You know, I don’t really mind sleeping together.” He admits, bashfully and trying to gauge your reaction to the potential thought of sharing a bed. “But obviously, if you’re uncomfortable with the idea, I completely understand too.”
“I don’t know… I’m just a bit embarrassed.” Your cheeks grow hot at the possibility of waking up next to Doyoung, how nice the fragrant of hotel body wash would smell from his skin so close.
Not to mention, the proximity of your bodies being way closer than they’ve ever been before. Just no respectable distance between the two of you underneath the sheets and completely vulnerable in your sleep.
“Of what?” The shift of the bed has you dipping toward him. “Do you snore?”
You don’t answer.
“I mean- like even if you did, it’s not a big deal and you don’t need to be embarrassed about it.” Doyoung frantically tries to make you feel better, seeing that your expressionless face leans closer to sadness rather than neutral. You two are definitely not on the level of friendship to be playful with each other yet.
So you lie just to see what he says. “I snore, I kick. I even steal blankets, Doyoung! And I think you’ll be too nice to wake me up about it or to take them off of me.”
Doyoung practically chokes on his spit at the last part of your sentence. “No, you’re right. I would be too nice to do any of that.” He seriously ponders for a second, his eyes darting around at the ground to maintain his focus on weighing the pros and cons. He really didn’t want to sleep on the floor.
“If it happens, it happens. I won’t mind either way now that I have a heads up.” He gets up to start unpacking his suitcase. “Like I said, there is nothing to be embarrassed about.”
“Fair warning, don’t be upset at me in the morning if you don’t get a good night’s rest. You can blame Johnny for that.” Unpacking the soft dress from your luggage, you smooth out its crinkles and hang it up in the tiny closet next to Doyoung’s jacket.
Doyoung laughs, he has actually been laughing the whole time you’ve spent with each other. It’s as if you’re some comedian and it has you wondering if you’re actually even that hilarious. “I’m pretty happy rooming with you. I’d rather be here than third wheeling with a couple still in their honeymoon phase.”
The magnitude of his words has a buzz running throughout your veins, hairs to stand up on your arms and a slight churning in your stomach. Mindlessly folding out his clothes, Doyoung has no actual clue how he is affecting you. He’s just oblivious to it all.
“Good thing I didn’t bail like everyone else.” The nervous chuckle that escapes your lips is unintentional, probably an awkward reflex to deflect how you’re dying at being in his presence alone.
Johnny’s birthday trip had been a last minute thing and only a select few were able to make it, some bailing at the very last day before. It was a weird time of the year, especially with the New Year starting not too long ago. However, this season allows for cheaper flights and accommodation since it was after the holidays.
It was initially supposed to be a group of Johnny’s close friends — you, Doyoung, Mark, Jaehyun, Yuta — in addition, his girlfriend. How the room arrangements were supposed to be was that you and his girlfriend would share an all girls room, while the guys shared one room.
That outcome could still technically be possible, but Johnny insisted on switching rooms so he can stay with his girlfriend after the others dropped and how he has already shared the experience of being roommates with Doyoung. He also knew how big of a crush you had for Doyoung, so he thought it would be more fitting to pair the lovers together.
Although, Doyoung didn’t like you back nor does he know you do. The severity of your crush is mild, just that Doyoung is the most attractive man ever with poise and an aura that oozes so sexily from him. This is the first chivalrous man in your life, meeting him through Johnny some years ago.
You and Johnny are family friends, your moms being the closest women duo on this Earth. When they’re together, they’re unstoppable. In return, the two of you are practically siblings and have spent every celebration, every holiday, every family event, every funeral together.
Doyoung is Johnny’s roommate from college, these two have been lifelong friends since then. Doyoung had actually moved to your hometown after college, finding an amazing job opportunity at the same company as Johnny. He started coming around a lot more to social events or whenever you saw Johnny. Since the first moment he offered you a ride home, you’ve been stuck on this infatuation for this incredibly charming and sweet man.
Though, you two never got extremely close despite your individual connections to Johnny. It has always felt like Doyoung is Johnny’s friend and vice versa. You also really had no reason to see Doyoung without Johnny, so there had always been a distance. You two spoke when in a group setting, just to make small talk about work, general life updates, or anything about Johnny.
On a very drunk night long ago, you and Johnny had been very well over your drinking limit and had been talking about nonsense between the two of you. Just old friends catching up, but the itch of asking about Doyoung had been bothering you all night.
“Out of curiosity, is Doyoung single?” Oh god, the alcohol has started speaking for you. Johnny raises a skeptical brow and beckons his beer bottle at you before taking a swig.
“Don’t tell me you’re interested in digital marketing Kim Doyoung, cubicle 4E80.”
The boldness overtakes you, it’s not like you lose anything asking a simple question to satisfy your curiosity. “What if I am?”
Johnny laughs, rather than lightheartedly, it is a robust laugh that feels like he’s mocking you and that your statement is unbelievably ridiculous. “He’s single, painfully single too.”
There is a brief pause as your drunken state processes the loud beating of your heart in your ears. Hope settles in, a big dumb grin plasters on your warm face.
“It’s interesting. He had asked about you too.” Johnny sits back and sinks into the couch. “He asked if you had a romantic partner.”
“Me?” You are truly in disbelief that he would ever even give you a second thought.
“Yeah, you dummy. I think he meant it as you should get into a relationship though, not asking if you were single because he is interested in you.” Your heart soars, quickly depleting after hearing Johnny’s explanation. So much for hope or a chance.
“I’m not fully understanding.”
“Doyoung is weird sometimes with his thoughts. I think he was trying to say that you seem lonely? Oh, and that you seem like you have a lot of love to give.” Johnny rubs his eyes with his knuckles, feeling the alcohol induced drowsiness coming on. “Such an observant man.”
Since that night, you never tried any advancements toward him. Partly because you are afraid of him catching onto something and because it was enough for you to realize he probably isn’t interested in you romantically.
Nonetheless, it doesn’t stop the butterflies from fluttering or from your smile growing whenever Doyoung says something nice. He is a naturally friendly and genuine person, super considerate of others and very kind. Johnny says that he has never met another man with such good intentions and a big heart, while still being snarky and intelligent.
“Heading to the pool?” Doyoung asks, a fist holding his swim shorts and a plain shirt. The warm weather outside is so inviting, knowing you’re probably going to get sunburnt at the end of it but it being a year’s worth of Vitamin D. Johnny definitely knows how to travel.
“Yeah, I can’t swim so I’ll just sit by the edge and dip my feet in.” You’re rummaging through your suitcase for your bikini cover-up until your hand hits the bottom of the barrel.
Panic creeps up your neck as you’re tossing all of your clothes out of your luggage now, picking through shirts, dresses, underwear and pants to find the one item you set a reminder to pack.
It’s not there. “Everything okay?” The genuinity in Doyoung’s voice makes you feel more embarrassed for some reason. Tossing all your belongings back into your suitcase, you throw your hands up in the air out of frustration.
“I can’t find my swimsuit cover up. I guess this is what happens when you dismiss a reminder before fulfilling it.” Slightly annoyed, you’re holding the two-piece in your palms and wondering if it is worth the hassle and bashfulness to wear it. You brought it with the intent of looking hot and sexy for the trip, while also keeping your decency by having a cover up to …. well, cover up.
You excuse yourself and clench the bikini in your hand, walking into the bathroom. Fuck it, you brought it. You’re going to wear it. If it gets too much, you’ll just wrap a towel around or buy a new cover up. It shouldn’t be too big of a deal and you already know that Johnny is going to give you shit for not joining them at the pool.
You’ll suck it up. Looking in the mirror, the bottoms barely cover your ass cheeks. Barely is an overstatement, the fabric is so far up your crack that it gives you a wedgie every time you move. Nonetheless, the baby pink is such a sweet color that you’re not minding the exposure too much.
Now, the top situation is a whole mess. The strings wrap around your midsection, but your arms are too short to give yourself a secure knot. After multiple attempts at stretching and pulling, twisting your arms in funky positions, you give up and think it’s best to call in help.
Doyoung. Fuck. You take a few deep breaths and examine yourself in the mirror again, reminding yourself of every positive affirmation and Doyoung is too nice to say anything. Calming your nerves, you gently push open the door.
“Doyoung, could you do me a huge favor and tie my bikini top for me? I genuinely don’t think it’s tight enough when I do it.” You peek your head out and his footsteps come from around the corner, happy to help!
Walking in, Doyoung looks taken aback by your choice of attire. You’re examining his reaction through the mirror as he stops at the door frame, his eyes widen and drag down your body twice. He is most definitely checking you out.
He clears his throat when he meets your eyes. “Did you want me to double knot it?” He asks, softly and shyly. Stepping behind you, his hot hands guide your hair to the side of your neck to expose your back. Your heart is in your throat when Doyoung takes the string from your hands and pulls it toward him, a bit too roughly.
You lose your footing and jolt back into him, your shoulder hitting his chest. “Shit, sorry.” His breathy apology in your ear sends chills up your spine and a slight rush down below.
The tension in the air is so thick – you’re both suffocating in it. Staring at his profile in the reflection, Doyoung’s expression is none of what you’ve seen before. It’s lustful, almost, if you’re not interpreting it incorrectly. He’s biting the inside of his cheek and he is trying to look everywhere but your ass and your breast from an aerial view.
“It’s okay.” You laugh it off, but he is unwavering. “You’re stronger than you look, Doyoung.”
Your light teasing breaks the serious concentration on his face and his shy gummy smile returns, “it’s from all the times Johnny dragged me to gym with him.”
He ties the knot perfectly, making sure it’s one of those pretty bows that top off a gift box. He’s quite happy with himself that he forgets your bare ass is inches away from his clothed dick.
His adam’s apple bobs as he swallows, “pink is a pretty color on you.” His eyes catch yours in the reflection of the mirror and a light blush dusts his cheeks, a kind half grin on his lips.
Your heart is soaring, once again. “It’s nice on you too.” Smiling back, there is a split second that you can actually believe that Doyoung could’ve felt some connection between the two of you. “Thank you for such an impressive bow.”
His demeanor shifts back to friendly, less serious and intense. “Yeah, no problem! If you’re still looking for a coverup, I have something you can borrow.”
Walking out of the stuffy bathroom, Doyoung hums and pulls out a white button up from his bag. It’s light and flowy, just the perfect thing to wear out on a beautiful day. He helps you slip on the sleeves and it covers your backside very well. It’s even better than the initial cover up you had. Then it hits you, you’re wearing his clothes. His scent falls on your body fruitfully and Doyoung doesn’t even flinch at the sight of you in his shirt.
Nonetheless, there is no denying that his stares seem to linger longer than they usually do.
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Despite multiple occasions of waiters and waitresses mistaking you and Doyoung as a couple, the first day of the trip was jam packed with good fun and no complaints. Johnny and his girlfriend love showing PDA, but keep it modest for those around. Doyoung enjoys getting his picture taken at every tourist spot, some lowkey alleyways or artsy areas that catch his eye. You just like being around your friends, in a new environment and living in the moment with them all.
The night had fallen upon you so quickly, the expression time flies when you’re having fun held true for this day. Johnny had mentioned prior that he wanted to have a romantic candlelit dinner with his girlfriend for one of the nights you were on this trip.
It didn’t hit you that he was actually being serious about that plan until you’re back in your hotel room with Doyoung, looking for a place to have dinner on your own.
“I didn’t know how much of a romantic Johnny is.” You’re blowing raspberries into the air as you scroll mindlessly on the internet for a good place to eat in this foreign area. Doyoung takes a seat on the chair at the desk, doing exactly the same as you.
“It takes the right person to get it out of him.” Doyoung mumbles, ruffling his hair out of his face cutely. The strands of his bangs disheveled and sticking up. “But he’ll do anything for the person he really likes.”
“I guess I’ve never seen that side of him.” You shrug, attention draining from the overwhelming selection of food choices in the area.
Doyoung notices your mind wandering and hears the tiny grumble of your stomach from hunger. “How about we go here? Looks like they have happy hour and a very nice aesthetic.”
He kneels down at the bed level to show you photos of the restaurant. It’s a large outside patio with decorative ambient string lights, vines of greenery hanging from the ceiling and the rustic wooden walls within the indoor portion of the restaurant.
Overall vibe of the place feels elevated, yet still trendy and modern. The food seems to be a fusion of Korean and Chinese cuisines and the prices look more than desirable.
“Half off main entree items and bottomless cocktails during happy hour?!” Sitting up, you’re grabbing Doyoung’s phone out of his hand to get a closer read on the menu. You’re in disbelief at such a good deal. “Let’s go!” You cheer, jumping up on your feet to pick an outfit for the night.
“I knew the bottomless cocktails will get you. You understand me, y/n.” Doyoung is as overjoyed as you, and you’re both happily smiling at each other without a thought about how good you make each other feel. Grabbing your flowy white romper, you change quickly in the room as Doyoung fixes up in the bathroom.
There is elegance in the white silk, yet it doesn’t make you look too overdressed or too casual. Leaning forward to the vanity, you’re clipping on some shiny earrings and the door opens behind you.
Doyoung steps out in that loose white button up you borrowed earlier today, three buttons unbuttoned from the neck to expose some of his toned chest, half tucked into his neat slacks. His hair is combed and styled back, getting a clear view of his sharp features and maturity. He looks so good, you almost start drooling.
“Oh, your zipper isn’t zipped all the way.” Doyoung breaks you out of your gawking. Without any hesitation, he walks up behind you and helps you with your zipper. This moment mirrors earlier events from this morning.
He chuckles, mostly to himself as he drags the zipper up and his eyes follow the trail of your spine to your eyes in the reflection. “How do you ever get yourself dressed when you need help getting dressed so often?”
“It’s a bit of a struggle, but I manage.” Straightening up your posture, Doyoung’s hand gently caresses your forearm. “But you definitely have made it easier for me today.” You’re still in shock as you watch Doyoung clip your bracelet around your wrist, dropping your arm back by your side ever so gently.
“I’m more than happy to be of assistance.” He clicks his tongue and this fleeting feeling of sensual tension finds itself lost again. Nonetheless, this moment is going to play like a loop of reruns in your mind the whole night.
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Three and a half cocktails in, you’re both indulging in a conversation that makes no sense to either one of you but it’s a harmonious time. Your heart is pounding in your ears from the alcohol running circles in your bloodstream, but the moderately loud ambiance of the restaurant creates a good buzz. Doyoung is a cute shade of red before you, every sip making him dangerously close to losing his senses.
“I have to say, this has been the most fun I’ve had in awhile.” The bottom of his glass hits the table and finds its way perfectly in the right spot everytime. The look of content fills his red cheeks and you’re seriously so intoxicated that your mouth has a mind of its own.
“What do you mean?” You know what he means, but the alcohol is asking for more context and reassurance. Has it been fun because of the copious amounts of drinks you two have had after only sharing an appetizer? Or is it genuinely because of you?
“You’re so easy to talk to. I feel like I can talk to you for hours.” His gummy smile twinkles in the dim atmosphere, all because the thought of talking to you for hours makes him full of glee and happiness. He isn’t one to hold back a genuine compliment, he wants you to know how he feels about you as a person. Intimacy didn’t exist between the two of you before tonight, but that changes with every exchange of glances and sweet words.
The call of his name gets his attention, eyebrows raised and eyes as alert as they can be, “you’re one of the only people in this world that I could listen to for hours.” There is no stopping you at this point. Another compliment and you’re bound to confess a part of your heart tonight to him.
Doyoung nods, understanding every bit of where you’re coming from. He gets you like how you get him. “There has been a question that’s been on my mind since I met you.”
Your breath hitches at the actuality that he thought enough about you to have such curiosity. You lived in his brain when you truly believed he would never give you a second look. “Why have you and Johnny never dated?”
The laugh that creeps up your throat almost slips out from hearing the question, but Doyoung is more than serious with this revealed secret question he had been holding onto for so long. Clearing your throat, your finger lightly traces the rim of your glass as you really think hard about every reason you are not attracted to Johnny romantically.
“I’ve known him practically since birth, so he has always been a good brother to me.” It really is that simple, shrugging to show that it's nothing too deep. “While we meet people in a certain moment of their lives, that version of them freezes as the person you will always know them to be to you.”
Doyoung watches your finger dance around. “To me, Johnny will always be a booger-eating cry baby. The love I have for him is purely familial, as if he was the reason for every scraped elbow growing up or for my fear of abandonment when he left me in the grocery store aisles.”
He hums lovingly at your explanation. “I’m guessing you get that question pretty often.”
“Besides his current girlfriend, you’re the only other person who has asked.” Your chuckle makes Doyoung slightly embarrassed, can he be that obvious? It’s fine, you both won’t remember this night fully.
“A follow up question then,” Doyoung leans forward with his elbows digging into the white table cloth, “who am I to you?”
Your eyes widen, those words are enough to knock some sense back into you. Your heart continues to pound in your ears, but also drumming against your chest quickly with every possible way you could answer him.
His eyes stare down at you like prey, just waiting patiently and silently for you to speak. Doyoung’s demeanor may seem confident on the outside, but he is dying to know on the inside. “You’re Johnny’s best friend.”
He lets the disappointment subside, the whiplash in your face is enough indication that you weren’t prepared for such a question. Doyoung relaxes back in his chair, dropping his gaze and nodding at your simple answer. It doesn’t satisfy him, but he can’t be someone to ask for much in this situation.
“Who am I to you?”
Doyoung rolls his lips, debating if his answer will only produce fruitful reactions or you would be turned off. The alcohol has too much control over his choice of words, truthfully, the haziness surrounds his vision. “You’re y/n, Johnny’s cute friend who I can’t seem to get out of my mind.”
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Something about Doyoung paying for dinner and his chivalrousness throughout the night oozes a romantic side of him you’re not used to. It felt as if you and Doyoung went on a real date together, even though it was curated off of unforeseen circumstances. Romance isn’t dead, as some may oppose. You could hope that Doyoung agreed.
“Doyoung, the shower is free for you now.” A towel wraps your wet hair up into a cone on your head, earning a small smile from Doyoung. He gathers his things and makes his way into the already steaming bathroom, your essence filling the tiny room.
You’re mindlessly scrolling on your phone, hearing the shower turn on and suddenly turn off. Then it hits you, you have walked out empty handed and your discarded clothes are still hanging on the glass door. You’re both quick at the door, but Doyoung beats you to open it from the other side.
His head pops out, the door slightly ajar. He is naked from the top down to the towel around his waist. Droplets dribble down his tone chest and stomach and your throat goes dry from the sight of him. “Don’t be embarrassed.” Doyoung says gently, holding out your dirty clothes in an orderly pile and your underwear visibly in the mix.
“Thank you.” Finding your words, you quickly take your belongings.
“I’m starting to think you’re doing this on purpose, y/n.” Doyoung clicks his tongue, a playful eyebrow raise and a corner of his lip turning upward into a smirk.
“No! I swear, you just make me so comfortable.. I’m treating this as if it’s my own space.” You’re coming to your senses, shutting the door on him so he couldn’t respond to such a ridiculous excuse. Your back hits the bathroom door, sliding down and huddling your laundry.
“I feel comfortable around you too.” You hear Doyoung say through the door. Though you couldn’t see him, a smile lies on his lips as he continues his nightly routine.
Some time passes, Doyoung enters the sheets before you and the anxiousness settles in your system when you know you have to eventually join him. He feels the shift in atmosphere, peering over at your hunched figure at the end of the bed.
“I can still sleep on the floor.” Pushing the blankets off of his body, he starts to get up. You’re fast to push his chest down, landing softly over him. You’re both unmoving in this position, out of pure shock of the sudden proximity.
Your eyes meet briefly, but you look away from his wide bunny eyes. “It’s okay. I don’t want you on the floor.”
His finger turns your chin to face him. The annoying pounding of your heart is loud in your eyes, aching from his hot touch and how you could seriously drown in his beautiful gaze. You’re wondering if he could hear it.
“Then, where do you want me?” Doyoung swallows, his Adam's apple bobbing at the sight of your lips before him and he is three seconds from diving into you. Completely stunned, obviously, taken aback by his bold question and the tension in the room seems to find its way back.
You want him in your arms. You want him suffocating you with his warm embrace. You want him where you are. Will he allow that? “The bed is fine.” The firmness in your voice assures Doyoung that you don’t feel unwavering. He would hate for you to feel the slightest uneasy. With a roll off of him, you’re planted on your back on the other side of the bed. Staring at the ceiling, you’re both processing the elephant that has overstayed its visit this entire day.
He has to have felt something. There is no way he could be that oblivious, you know he isn’t.
Pulling the sheets over your body, your back is facing Doyoung as he tries to find a good position to doze off in. Heat radiates off of your bodies underneath the blankets and you’re partly grateful to be sharing the bed with such a gorgeous man. Peering over your shoulder, Doyoung swipes on his phone aimlessly looking through the photos he took today.
He feels your curious eyes on him, “want to help me choose which ones I should keep?” Doyoung scoots a bit closer toward the middle of the bed, closing the distance between the two of you slowly.
As this man speedily scrolls through photo after photo, you’re too much in awe at how a simple photo could capture how handsome he is. You’re trying to be helpful, without saying much, but still trying. He deletes a random one at his distaste in a blink that you could barely keep up.
“Do, you look great in all of these.” You sigh, moving even closer to him as his shoulder hits your arm. You’re swiping a few photos back to one that caught your eye – gummy smile, hand covering his eyes, low light underneath the stars, one hand in his pants pocket. He is the perfect wallpaper material. “I like this one the best.”
“You can’t see my face in that one.” He laughs, “what do you like about it?”
“You look good.” It’s all you could say, anything more will tip the boat.
He instantly favorites it, moving on before he can dig anymore about your vague explanations. Swipe after swipe, a new angle, a new pose, a new facial expression but all in the same area. You’re starting to get sleepy at the endless miniscule details, but your eyes shoot open when he swipes upon a photo of you and then, quickly dismissing it as if you weren’t supposed to see.
“Was that me?” You ask, practically grabbing his phone. Doyoung sheepishly rubs the back of his neck, letting you scroll through his phone to find more pretty candids he took of you without you knowing. Progressively, you begin to see yourself in his perspective or maybe, he really is just that great at taking photos.
Nonetheless, you’ve never seen yourself like this. Hair in action, caught in the sweep of the wind. Your smile is as bright as the moon, very natural and genuine happiness painting your face at something stupid that Johnny probably said. There you are among your own laughter and excitement, Doyoung captured such beautiful parts of you that you didn’t know existed.
Doyoung breaks the silence between the both of you, slowly reading your facial reactions at the pictures. He slowly inches closer, his head slightly above your shoulder.
“I can’t help, but notice how happy you look when you laugh. Your smile is contagious.” He whispers, swiping a few more photos to land on one that you wouldn’t have even recognized was yourself.
Your right hand brushes your hair out of your face and you’re smiling from ear to ear. It had to be a moment at dinner with him. Doyoung knew the reason behind that gorgeous smile was him. “So pretty.” His voice leaves a chill down your spine and goosebumps to rise on your arms.
He perks up at the sound of his name, “I’m genuinely confused.” You say, setting his phone down and looking at him with eyebrows furrowed together. “I know you’re a nice person so it could be just your mannerisms or the intimacy of sharing a bed, but I don’t want to misunderstand your intentions.”
“Oh,” Doyoung shifts away from you, the bed dipping at the movement as he scoots back over to his side of the bed. “I’m sorry if I came off as overbearing.”
“No, that’s not what I mean.” You’re fighting with yourself, trying to decide if you should just confess. What is the worst that could happen? You’re stuck together in the same room for two more nights and he will know that you’re insanely attracted to him.
But there feels like a chance. You could be incredibly delusional and misreading everything. You sigh, unsure how to proceed with this conversation. Nonetheless, Doyoung can see how heavy your heart seems.
“Is there something I did?”
“No, forget it.” You’re pulling the blankets back over your body again, turning off the lamp on your side of the bed and staring up at the ceiling. Doyoung follows your lead, doing the same and the room falling into complete darkness. Your shaky breaths being the only audible noise in the silent space.
There is so much adrenaline in your throat, coursing through your veins at how close you are to just telling him.
“Just know that you can tell me anything. I know we’re not the closest of friends, but I feel like that’s sometimes better.” Doyoung turns to face you and you’re staring at him in the low light, making out the most gentle and comforting smile that puts your heart at ease.
“Doyoung, I like you and it’s not just because you’re a nice person, I have romantic feelings for you. I hope you can understand.” You’re all choked up that it makes Doyoung’s heart ache. Confessions are way harder than they need to be, but you did it. That's all that matters.
You didn’t need reciprocal feelings from him, you just needed him to be okay with it. He is silent for a while, his gaze dropping and wandering the sheets. He, too, is conflicted about how he should proceed.
Laying on your side, you face him fully. Doyoung peers up at the shift and his eyes are intensely gazing at you. Your heart is back thumping at your chest and drumming in your ears.
Before you know it, Doyoung is leaning forward and his lips land on yours softly. Your eyes remain open and in shock, but you kiss him back fruitfully. This long awaited kiss has finally fallen upon you, something you’ve wondered days on end how his lips taste.
Doyoung kisses your lips tenderly, almost as if he has waited for this moment too. Gliding effortlessly along yours and a sweet heat that lingers deliciously, he kisses like a shy romantic. You’re both too hesitant to touch one another, afraid of asking for too much. Your arms are stuck to your chest, hands in fists and tensions rising.
His knuckle lightly brushes your cheek, and as you close your eyes and settle into the kiss, you find yourself deepening it and free falling right into him. Desperation? It is the right amount to indicate how much you wanted it, how much you have craved him.
You are kissing Kim Doyoung. That thought alone could leave you grinning ear to ear for days. He doesn’t even know how much it affects you.
When you both pull away, Doyoung’s lips are pretty and plump. It compels you to give him a last quick peck and he chuckles cutely. His eyelids fall over his eyes ever so slowly, his long eyelashes dancing on his cheekbones and he looks surreal.
“I’ve wanted to kiss you this entire day.” Your heart would stop right there. His raspy confession has your whole face turning hot, “ever since I saw you in your pink swimsuit. You don’t know what you do to me.” He buries his shyness into his pillow. Seeing Doyoung like this is new, it’s so adorable that you don’t know how to react besides giggling at how shy he is. He usually holds himself up pretty well, getting embarrassed here and there by Johnny’s silly actions or boldness. Nonetheless, here he is, barely able to look you in the eyes and a pillow shielding his pretty face.
“Have you always felt this way?” Your fingers touch your lips, still in disbelief at the scandalous kiss you two just shared and coming to the realization that Doyoung could have felt this way this whole time.
“Since the moment I met you, you have always been endearing to me. But since you are practically Johnny’s non-biological sister, you felt out of reach.” Doyoung sighs, “I didn’t want to cross any boundaries or make it seem like I was some creep trying to hit on you through Johnny. I respect you a lot, y/n, and Johnny does too.”
His voice grows soft and his words are still so kind. Doyoung is effortlessly sweet and chivalrous. At times, you question how he and Johnny managed to be the best of friends. Doyoung is so outwardly soft and feminine, emotionally attuned and safe. Johnny is all those things as well, but not as clear as Doyoung.
Growing up, Johnny always felt like he needed someone like Doyoung to reassure him that boys can cry too. Although you never imagined that you would stumble upon a dream man like Doyoung, he lays next to you in bed with endless thoughts of you running at full speed in his head.
“I’m speechless.”
“I can tell.” Doyoung smiles, “I’ve kept my distance enough to not give you any impression of interest.” He coyly puts his arms behind his back and peers over at how stunned you look blinking back at him. “Let’s sleep, I want you to rest up for the day tomorrow.”
“I feel like this is going to keep me awake.” You slide down to lay firmly on your side to face him.
“Will sleeping in my arms help?” Doyoung extends his arm out for you to snuggle up next to him. You’re practically losing your mind at how forward he is, it’s as if five minutes early he wasn’t all shy about confessing to you. “Sorry, too much.”
Nonetheless, you dive right into him like it's all you’ve ever known. Your face hits his chest and the scent of his laundry detergent immediately hits your nose. His warm arm wraps around your upper back as he presses you closer. Planting a delicate kiss on your forehead, Doyoung rubs soothing circles on your back to help you sleep.
So if this was a dream, you hope to never wake from it.
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The stuffy morning has you and Doyoung tiptoeing around one another. When you had woken up, Doyoung was already in the bathroom to freshen up and prepare for the day. You both had exchanged small good mornings before you had also disappeared into the bathroom. Now, you two silently get ready in your own corners of the room and nothing but the sound of clattering fills the air.
Did he have a sudden change in heart? You grow more confused with this man as it turns from day to night. Doyoung looks over his shoulder at you, noticing the eerie silence in the room.
“How did you sleep?” He asks, clearing his throat awkwardly. Good thing you two didn’t fuck or anything, you feel like that would make this moment even more awkward than it already is.
“Fine. You?”
Doyoung laughs, mostly to himself, as he remembers the position you two woke up in. “Seems like someone couldn’t let go of me last night, so I would say it was pretty good.”
Your embarrassment doesn’t shy away from being evident. Slowly, you turn to face him. Doyoung leans against the wall a relaxed fit, hair nicely falling above his eyebrows and a grin so taunting, you wouldn’t have believed it was his. He notices your lip quiver before you begin to speak and he reassures you once more.
“Don’t be embarrassed. It’s cute.” Doyoung makes his way toward you, his delicate hands holding your forearms quite lovingly and his kind smile tries to make you feel better. You both gaze into each other’s eyes like they’re all you’ve ever known in life.
This is so romantic. You’ve forgotten that you two aren’t dating.
“Would it be too much of an ask for us to start seeing each other?” He shakes his head without hesitation. Kissing your forehead, he can literally see how beautifully you admire him.
“I want to be with you.” He draws you in tighter. “I want to be yours.” Doyoung whispers. A chill runs down your spine. “However, you have to let me take you out on a proper date before we settle things. One where I ask you out, pick you up and bring you your favorite flowers.”
“I’d really love that.” It is no joke how incredibly immersed in this man you are. Never in your dreams would you think that a moment like this would exist between the two of you.
All it took was sharing a bed. If only Johnny had thought of that sooner.
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luvyeni · 1 year
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hi, you know that perverted nct dream writing with an 8 member, could you make a version of nct 127 and nct 2020?
i've done a ton of perv!nctdream x 8th member so i hope this is what you mean because you did specify. (i know mark and haechan are in 127 , but remember i write them with the dreamies)
perv!nct127 and their 9th member that they can easily manipulate into doing things for them , because she's so eager to please them and trusts them.
perv!taeil who convinces you to suck him off backstage right before a music show preformance. "taeil , you were too rough last time , it was hard for me too sing." "i'll be gentle this time, trust me baby , now put it in your mouth."
perv!taeyong who invites you to one of his solo studio sessions , making you ride his cock while he writes down lyrics. "t..taeyong what if someone walks in." "they won't , don't you trust your leader , just keep riding my dick love."
perv!johnny who convinces you to cockwarm him during a live , to anyone it looks like you're just sitting on his lap , but in reality you're struggling not to moan , while his big cock is stuffed in your cunt , whispering in his ear. "j..johnny this is a bad idea." "princess they don't even notice , just trust me."
perv!yuta who easily convinces you to wear shorter skirts without the safety shorts , just so he can get a look under your skirt when you sit down. "but the safety shorts are to protect me from flashing the cameras." "don't worry about that love , you trust me right?"
perv!doyoung who's pulling you into one of the rooms while filming a overnight stay content to fuck you. "do..doyoung it might be cameras in here." "trust me love, i checked to make sure there isn't."
perv!jaehyun hands slid up cupping your heat under the table during an award ceremony , sliding your panties to side , fingering you. "no..not here jae , too many cameras." "they won't notice unless you keep making that face , just trust me."
perv!jungwoo who slyly moves your hand over to his cock as the fan moves on to the next , your eyes widen quickly changing your face to not raise suspicions , leaning over to him. "jungwoo what are you doing , we're gonna get caught." "don't worry about it , the table is covering us , trust me love."
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taetr4ck · 11 months
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NCT 127 WHEN YOU RIZZ THEM OUT !
bf!nct 127 x reader (separated) — crack. warnings: cursing
a/n: i kinda need a doyie and yongie in my life ngl (real)
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requests are open 🤍
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gyundo · 10 months
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“A Neighbor Like You”
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Kim Dongyoung (Doyoung) x Male Reader
SMUT! DNI if under 18!!!
Plot: Doyoung is Y/N’s older neighbor who takes an interest in the boy.
Y/N L/N was in his first year of college and was just moving into his new apartment. Excited to start a new phase in his life, Y/N put down the box in his hands and looked around to the place that would become his home.
Y/N’s parents walked in the door a moment after with the last of Y/N’s things. After a tearful goodbye, Y/N waved goodbye to his parents and went up to his apartment.
Y/N walked around the place with a deep sigh, having left home for the first time and unsure of when he’d see his parents next. Yet at the same time, Y/N was ready to begin his independent life.
In an effort to get to know his neighbors, Y/N decided to give some of his cookies to everyone on his story, starting with his next door neighbor.
Y/N quietly walked over to the next door and rung the bell, a little bit nervous about whether his neighbors would be nice and welcoming or rough and rude.
The door was opened by a handsome man in his mid 30s with a white T-shirt that showed off his muscular build. While not a bodybuilder, it was clear that the man had worked out for a good time, furthered by his significantly muscular thighs on display with his 2 inch inseam shorts.
Y/N looked up and down and was drooling in his mind before the neighbor said, “Can I help you?”
Y/N snapped back to reality, introducing himself, “Hello, I’m Y/N L/N, and I just moved here. I wanted to give you these cookies and please let me know if you need me anytime for anything .”
The man looked Y/N up and down, before teasing him by grabbing his hand and then the box of cookies before saying, “Thanks, I’m Doyoung and I might take you up on that offer real soon.”
Y/N quickly gave the rest of his neighbors cookies, who were mostly families. Y/N couldn’t get the image of the mature man who opened the door for him out of his sinful mind as he pondered on what they could be doing as they were only a wall away.
Doyoung knocked on Y/N’s door while Y/N has just finished stashing away all of his things. Y/N ran up to go answer and was more than excited to see the handsome man again. At a closer distance, Y/N was able to smell his cologne and naturally musky smell, attracting him more to the older man as he kept looking up and down the eye candy called Doyoung.
“You said I could call you anytime, Y/N. Here I am, I need some help with dinner,” Doyoung slyly replied while giving Y/N a smirk.
Y/N was too innocent to pick up on the smirk but thought it was very clever that his neighbor found a way to invite him over for dinner. Nonetheless, Y/N was very excited and followed his neighbor into his apartment.
Y/N’s eyes looked around in shock as he noticed Doyoung’s detailed wall accents, accessories, and furniture that was extremely well kept, especially for a bachelor. He was only impressed more and more by Doyoung, who invited Y/N into the kitchen.
“It’s making dinner and finishing it that I needed your help with,” Doyoung joked.
Y/N expressed his gratitude to Doyoung for letting him in and for the dinner while Doyoung instructed Y/N to cut some green onions for a garnish.
Y/N kept stealing glances of Doyoung’s body and face, enthralled by the square rim glasses falling low on Doyoung’s nose, the defintion and veins on his arms emerging with every chop he made with the knife, and the meatiness of Doyoung’s thighs.
Y/N just kept collecting images of Doyoung in his mind, probably for jerk off material later, but what he didn’t realize is that his gaze was obvious to the experienced Doyoung.
Doyoung knew Y/N was attracted to him and was ready to ensnare him in his trap. Making a small move to fluster him, Doyoung tsk tsked to Y/N.
“You’re not cutting the green part fine enough, lemme show you,” Doyoung claimed with a straight face, all the while walking over to Y/N and hovering over his body. Doyoung leaned in and held Y/N’s hand over the knife as he guided his chopping, while simultaneously moving his body closer to Y/N’s. His front side was eventually fully pressed against Y/N’s back, enabling him to feel Y/N smooth and bouncy ass on his crotch.
Y/N on the other hand, could not stop blushing after he felt Doyoung’s large cock, making it clear there was no underwear underneath Doyoung’s already revealing shorts. Y/N’s just let Doyoung’s hand take control of the knife and his hand as he felt the warmth from behind him.
Doyoung slowly moved away, knowing that Y/N was in a state like hypnosis and would do whatever the older wanted out of attraction.
The dinner was soon finished, as Doyoung asked Y/N questions and learned of the other’s young age, his college apprehensions, while informing the other of his age and lifestyle as well.
Doyoung and Y/N’s neighborly relationship had started on good footing, but things were only about to get better and closer.
Right before Y/N was to bring the plates into the dining room, Doyoung cleaver stashed away the second chair so there was only one chair left.
As Y/N brought the food to the table, Doyoung explained that he only kept one chair because it was usually just him at home, but it wasn’t going to be an issue.
Doyoung sat down and Y/N was shocked as Doyoung pulled Y/N down into his lap.
“Problem solved, you can just sit in my lap. There’s not going to be any trouble with that, right Y/N?” Doyoung teased with a smirk as Y/N blushed.
Y/N was struggling to prevent getting an erection while sitting on such a hot man’s thighs. Y/N enjoyed the warmth of Doyoung’s muscular things and abdomen more than the warmth of the rice bowl he was eating, and he convinced himself to relish every moment of sitting on Doyoung’s lap in case he didn’t have the opportunity again.
Luckily for Y/N, Doyoung saw through all of his antics as clear as day and let the younger have his way with maximizing the skinship between the two. Doyoung himself was having trouble restraining himself from an erection as the younger shifted on his lap, allowing Doyoung to enjoy the shape of Y/N’s ass as well.
Dinner was soon finished, and Doyoung took off his shirt, “Damn that rice bowl really heated me up (in more ways than one).” Y/N was still eating, but he kept sneaking glances at Doyoung’s abs, well defined pecs, and rounded, muscular shoulders.
As oblivious as a virgin would be, Y/N just kept getting hornier while not realizing Doyoung’s intent.
Doyoung knew that Y/N was a virgin from the way he acted and saw that his chance to take the younger was a pretty good one, as Y/N clearly swinged his way.
Doyoung got up once Y/N finished his meal and led him into the bedroom, “There’s something here I need your help with.”
Just as Y/N entered, Doyoung quickly shut the door behind him and pushed Y/N to the wall as he kissed him aggressively.
“My first kiss, mm, feels so good,” Y/N thought as he tried to kiss back Doyoung, whose tongue was encircling his in a dance that spoke of technique and experience. Y/N was shocked but due to his arousal, he melted right into Doyoung’s arms.
Doyoung moved their lower bodies closer as he pulled his lips apart from Y/N before whispering in his ear,“ It’s my cock that really needs your tight hole, the dinner was just a distraction,” all the while rubbing his hard on against Y/N’s.
Y/N was worried on how he would take a large cock in his virgin ass that had never even been touched before, but his horniness clouded his mind as he agreed, saying out to the other with a blank expression, “Please take me. I’ve been so horny painfully so since I saw you this afternoon. I want you to give me my first feeling of cock, please you’re such a DILF, Doyoung.”
Doyoung smirked back, “I had my eyes on you too, you seemed like such a fresh piece of meat that I knew I wanted to the be the first to pound your hole so you learn how good anal can be. Looks like all my tactics worked, I’ve ensnared another prey in my trap of attraction.”
Doyoung threw Y/N onto the bed before kissing him aggressively again. Doyoung took off Y/N’s t-shirt before sucking on his nipples.
“Milk me, D-Daddy. AHHH,” Y/N screamed as he felt a surge of sensitivity in the area before Doyoung moved onto the next one, prompting a light yelp. Doyoung then skillfully rid Y/N of the confinements of his shorts and underwear with just one hand, while the other muscular hand with veins and thick fingers rubbed itself all over Y/N’s abdomen, like a massage that was giving the other warmth and making his lower body feel a pressure to cum.
Knowing that Y/N was being stimulated extremely well due to his technique. Doyoung began to slowly pump Y/N’s cock with a tight grip as Y/N moaned out.
“It feels so good, it never feels this good when I do it,” Y/N said with a fucked-out expression.
“That’s cause I know exactly how to make you feel good, Y/N,” Doyoung proudly stated while rubbing his finger over Y/N’s glans, causing the younger to throw his head back and lift up his legs.
Doyoung stopped abruptly as the younger began to whimper for more pleasure, “Don’t you think it’s time I pound your ass nice and good, Y/N? You better only cum from having this cock inside you. Take a nice long, hard look,” while Doyoung took off his own shorts.
Y/N kept staring at Doyoung’s cock, which perfectly matched his body in its huge size. 9 inches long with a thick shaft and multiple veins that emphasized its power, Y/N never felt like he needed dick more in his life than in this moment.
Doyoung brought his fingers close to Y/N’s mouth, commanding the younger to lick. He scooped up a decent amount of Y/N’s saliva, rubbing it over his cock.
Y/N yelped as Doyoung flipped him over onto his stomach and got behind him, holding open his ass cheeks to reveal his tight, pink, virgin hole.
Doyoung spit onto Y/N’s hole, before getting on his knees right behind Y/N in order to rub his tip against Y/N’s hole.
“Ready to be a slut just for me, Y/N? Want me to pound your ass until you forget your name and your body is imprinted with the shape of my cock?”
Y/N groaned, “Mmm, please Mr. Kim breed me good.”
Doyoung chuckled, “Of course I will, not everyone opens up their virgin ass to a stranger within the first few hours of meeting them. No condom either, your ass need to know how real cock feels.”
Doyoung quickly pushed all of his cock into Y/N’s tight hole at once, feeling the need to do him nice and rough his first time. Y/N yelled out at the huge intrusion in his formerly virgin ass that had never been touched before, let alone penetrated by a huge cock.
“How does my huge dick feel,” Doyoung asked while reveling in the pleasure of having his dick surrounded tightly after a very long time.
“Mm-g-good,” Y/N managed to cry out while tears rolled out of his eyes due to the searing pain in his ass.
“Your ass is so tight, pretty lucky that you found a perfect cock like me to take it,” Doyoung cooed while thrusting further up.
Y/N’s tears increased as Doyoung’s thrusts only increased, in both frequency and depth.
Y/N thoroughly felt his ass being mangled and pounded deep as he struggled to cope with the initial pain, still crying out.
Doyoung stopped for a brief second, “Aww, is my baby crying? Does it hurt?” to Y/N.
Just as Y/N nodded, Doyoung resumed his thrusts at an even more increased pace, “You need to adjust to cock properly Y/N, that’s the only way you’ll learn to enjoy mine”.
Y/N’s tears increased as the pain remained the same but he slowly got used to the pleasure as Doyoung relentlessly thrusted into him from behind.
The warmth from Doyoung’s well exercised abs and soft pecs turned on Y/N even more as Doyoung reeled in the joy of Y/N’s tight ass, whispering dirty nothings in his ear as he continued his anal onslaught.
Doyoung’s thick, sweaty balls slapped hard against Y/N’s taint as he asked, “Enjoying getting done all rough like this by a huge cock. I’m not done yet?” while increasing his thrusts to an animalistic pace inside Y/N, as his ass slowly molded to the shape of Doyoung’s cock.
Y/N responded with a moan as Doyoung stuffed his mouth with his pheromone laced underwear that smelled strongly of his cock, while putting his hands around Y/N’s neck to lightly choke him.
“This is what a young boy like you truly needs, a real man’s cock ruining your ass deeply and teaching you the pleasure of having big dick in stuffing your tight hole. You like getting manhandled like this, don’t you Y/N. You wanted this all along, didn’t you?” Doyoung dirtily questioned the younger.
“Mhm-AAHH,” Y/N yelled out through the fabric stuffed in his mouth as his eyes rolled back from Doyoung’s large cock rubbing right against his prostate. Doyoung smirked at the reaction and began incessantly thrusting right at Y/N’s prostate as his cock began twitching uncontrollably.
“I’m gonna breed you and make you my personal boy. My cock is going to feed your ass with a huge amount of daddy’s cum. I want your ass to know my dick very well since this will be a daily thing from now on, right Y/N? Your tight pink hole is all mine,” Doyoung yelled out while moving his girthy cock through the tight and moist passage Y/N provided.
Every thrust had Y/N’s hole twitching around Doyoung’s cock as his walls squeezed and hugged his veins tightly. Doyoung was enjoying such a tight, pure ass after so long and swore to make it completely his by marking it up with his hot cum. He wanted the shape of his cock impressioned inside Y/N’s hole so it was clear it belonged to him.
“So-so BIG DOYOUNG,” Y/N yelled out with a muffled voice while simulate pulse licking the shorts in his mouth to enjoy the pheromones of Doyoung’s cock that was thrusting in his ass mercilessly, opening it up for the first time.
Y/N was full of overstimulation as he felt the warmth from Doyoung’s large muscles, smell from his underwear, and his huge cock abusing his prostate with perfect technique and precision, sending rippling waves of pleasure throughout his body.
Doyoung had succeeded, as there was no way Y/N wouldn’t be able to resist having this pleasure coursing throughout his body every single day. Y/N knew only Doyoung’s girth cock, still pounding away at his squelching hole, would be able to satisfy him.
Doyoung’s cock continued to fill Y/N’s ass perfectly to the brim, stretching out his asshole so much for the first time, and making the experience addictive for both.
“You want my cum now, bitch boy? You want daddy to cum in you and mark you his? You’re gonna take this big load, i’ve been saving it just for this tight ass. You want everyone to see that only I can pound you this rough and good,” Doyoung asked with pride as his thrusts got faster, never faltering.
“MAKE ME YOURS DADDY, FILL UP MY HOLE WITH YOUR CUM AND IMPREGNATE ME! I ONLY WANT YOUR HUGE DICK MR KIM,” Y/N moaned while pushing his ass back onto Doyoung’s cock meeting his thrusts.
“I’m the only one who’s good enough to take you and I’m cumming in your ass cause it belongs to me now. A youngster like you needs the semen of a mature daddy in your ass to really be broken in fully,” Doyoung moaned out as he felt his climax nearing.
Doyoung pulled out and slapped his humongous cock inside Y/N once again, bulging his abdomen and causing him to let out a loud moan of pleasure as Doyoung groaned, leaning his head back as his cock let out years of semen into Y/N’s ass, painting his pink walls fully with the color of Doyoung’s cum. The sound of large spurts forcefully landing on Y/N’s pink walls abused by Doyoung’s cock filled the room. Doyoung had finished taking and impregnating a virgin Y/N with his large cock and his cum that now squelched the inside of Y/N’s ass.
Doyoung slowly moved his cock back and forth to let Y/N’s ass feel the warmth of his hot semen as Y/N came from the feeling, releasing in giant threads all over Doyoung’s mattress, out of a great pleasure that Y/N had never felt before.
“Keep your huge dick inside my ass daddy, I don’t want any of your cum to leave me and prevent me from fully getting pregnant, Y/N moaned out slutily.
“Of course my Y/N-ie, I definitely needed a horny neighbor like you,” Doyoung smirked back as his cock became hard again and the thrusting resumed, overstimulating Y/N with a pleasure that made his mind go blank over and over again, as another session of many commenced.
747 notes · View notes
lisired · 1 month
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whisper
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pairing: actor/dad’s best friend!doyoung x actress!reader
genre/warnings: smut, dilf!doyoung, cheating, secret love affair, age gap (21+), minor impact play, loads of praise with a hint of degradation, protected and unprotected sex (dont be silly wrap ur willy), oral (f receiving), fingering, non-idol actor!au, yet another special appearance by mark lee, taeyong is mcs dad im sorry.
summary: When you were nineteen, you could only dream of meeting Kim Doyoung in his sheets. Behind his back you watched all the movies he starred in, wanting nothing more than to be the one he touched whenever a sex scene came on. So when the opportunity surfaced four years later after you’re casted together in the same movie, you didn’t hesitate to snag it - even if it meant hiding from his wife, your father, and the public. And even if feelings developed.
word count: 8.9k
a/n: 2/4 of the Temptation series. Feedback is appreciated!
Doyoung was doing what people called, “living the dream.”
More like he did an excellent job at convincing people he was. There was something humorous to you about the article concerning the allegedly perfect life of your co-star. It summed his life up as, “happily married with a child, thriving with a successful career in the entertainment industry, and age having yet to catch up to him.”
You supposed what they said wasn’t entirely false. Thirty-six years into his life, Doyoung was still fairly young. He had a beautiful wife, a beautiful daughter, and loved his job with a passion, but beneath all of that beauty was the ugly he had carefully tucked out of the public’s prying eyes. His marriage was more loveless and affair-filled than the show he put on gave away.
And you were a culprit.
The story was a long one. For you, it started when you were nineteen. That year was a grand one for Doyoung as he was getting booked left to right and it begun his legacy as “the actor with the steamy sex scenes.” You watched every single movie. Scene after scene, you wondered how he made something so hot look so realistic, and imagined being the one under him.
Little did you know, your dreams would come true four years later. When you were asked roughly two years ago to star alongside Kim Doyoung in an upcoming romantic drama by the name of Whisper, you couldn’t deny the opportunity. A part of you feared what your father would think of the role, considering Doyoung was a good friend of his, but you were relieved when he wasn’t bothered. He called it “the beauty of acting.”
It was too bad that everything you felt for Doyoung was unable to be faked. You were far beyond attracted to him, on a level that the public nor your father, should’ve, would’ve, and could’ve ever known.
A knock jerked you from your thoughts. Your father stood by the door, peering in as he announced, “Hey, love. Doyoung’s here.”
Fighting your smile was too hard. Now that you were going to star in a movie together you and Doyoung met up often these days, even though you no longer were in the stage of what he dubbed perfecting your chemistry (but all that ever meant was sneaking away into his sheets.)
It stung to wonder if he slept with all his co-stars. No wonder their sex scenes looked so natural, the emotion had to be raw.
Shoving the thought into the back of your head, you rose from your bed and replied, “Alright. I’ll be back tonight, love you.”
“Love you too, dear. Have fun!”
Doyoung was standing outside the front door when you arrived there. He smiled gently, outstretching his hand kindly and waiting for you to slip your fingers between his, which you did promptly. “Missed me?”
Oh, did you. With the movie being a priority for you both, there was never a large gap in between times that you saw one another, but your new-found attachment to Doyoung made every second seem to drag on. You woke up every morning and couldn’t wait to see him.
You groaned, “You have no idea.”
Doyoung chuckled. He opened the car door for you and once you were seated, leaned into your ear and whispered, “Why don’t you show me how much when we get home?”
There was no confusion on how he managed to persuade you into his sheets. On-screen and off-screen Doyoung was relentlessly sexy, and his voice alone sent shivers down your spine. You loved when he whispered dirty things in your ear like that. It was gentle yet hot, and made your whole body tense with desire.
“Y-yeah,” you murmured in your best attempt at feigning unaffectedness. Actor to actress however, Doyoung could see right through you. He knew you wanted him and it amused him how poor of a job you did at hiding it. 
On the way to his house, you tried to think of anything but the surge of arousal between your thighs. What you were meant to be doing was crafting impeccable chemistry. Doyoung was an actor known for his undeniable chemistry with his costars and the raunchy sex scenes that came from them, and you being his best friend’s daughter made you no exception to his streak.
You were to play the role of a mistress of an heir who had his life painted perfectly and was adored by his country. In reality, his marriage was complicated and brittle and he turned to a mistress to relieve himself of the things he couldn’t seek in his wife. It was almost amusing to you that the drama seemed to hit the nail on the head when it came to describing what your relationship had become. You’d be damned if anyone said the acting was anything less than extraordinary - all of the emotion was real.
The car ride came to an abrupt end with your thoughts. Doyoung helped you out of the vehicle and barely let you breathe when you both stepped inside his house. He was pressing you back against the door in a matter of seconds, lips targeting your neck as his fingers worked hungrily to undress you.
“Fuck,” you moaned softly. He was making you impatient. “How much time do we have?”
“The whole day if we wanted. Maya took Daphne to see her grandmother this weekend, and they’ll be gone until Monday morning.”
That sounded like heaven. With the feeling of Doyoung’s body on yours, you were relieved to know that you could savor it longer, without having to race to pleasure. You two had also been working actively on the movie a lot harder than it seemed right now, and these little sexcapades were like much-needed breaks.
As if he could read your mind, Doyoung teased as he slid your shirt down your shoulders, “Bet you like the thought of fucking me all day, huh? You want me all to yourself?”
“Doyoung,” you whimpered.
“Shh, don’t worry, baby,” he crooned, sweeping you into his arms and making a move towards the bedroom, “I’m gonna take care of you.”
It was almost telepathic. There was a mutual understanding between you both that went beyond sex, and that was how you landed yourself in this predicament in the first place; you understood his needs, he understood yours.
“I missed you, too,” Doyoung announced quietly as he pushed your panties to the side, helping himself to your pussy. “I’ve been thinking about you.”
You replied in the midst of a moan, “Thinking about me?”
“Mm-hm,” he hummed and leaned closer to your ear, “A lot. Thinking about you under me. On me. Thinking about how needy you are and get from the smallest things. Thinking about how cute you sound when I touch you and how shy you get when I tell you what I wanna do to you.”
His honesty would be the death of you. Doyoung was open yet tender in the way that he expressed things, completely unafraid of intimacy and letting you know that he wanted you. He never let you forget that he adored every aspect of your body, showering you in kisses and more often than not, praises in the form of whispers.
You were weak, and it didn’t help that at the same time he was telling you things that made your heart race, his fingers were also pacing in and out of you. He was no longer a want - you needed him inside of you, now.
“Fuck me already,” you cried, your patience dissipating rapidly.
Disapproving of your attitude, Doyoung delivered a smack to your thigh that made you cry out once more. “Where’s your manners?”
You had forgotten them - and anything that wasn’t the growing ache between your thighs, for that matter. It was safe to say that your eagerness had taken over you, although you knew Doyoung would give you everything you wanted as long as you behaved. He was always gentle unless you gave him a reason to be the opposite, and that was on rare occasions. But once he decided to show you no mercy, you were doomed. And you didn’t even want to think about not cumming.
“Doyoung, please fuck me,” you corrected yourself, adding for good measure, “I need you. So bad, it hurts.”
He hummed, satisfied. “Well we can’t have that, can we?”
Doyoung withdrew his fingers and whirled you around, hushing you with a kiss before you could whimper any complaint. All you could focus on was the taste of his tongue in your mouth, grounding yourself with his shoulders as the gesture had caught you off-guard. Meanwhile he was tugging your panties off, with help from you as you lifted your legs.
He cupped your pussy again and you moaned into his mouth before he parted and asked, “You want me?”
“Yes,” you replied a little too fast. “Please.”
“Then show me.”
It was obvious what he meant by showing him. He wanted you to ride him, and you weren’t one to argue. You’d take Doyoung in any position he was willing to try. You just needed him in you.
Doyoung was never too bent on specific positions, either. He was always the one in control, but he was firm enough in himself that he didn’t need to be on top to show power. Even if it was your body making the movements, it was him telling you what to do. Most of the time you had no problem bending to his will.
Right now was one of those times. You yanked down his boxers, discarding them onto the ground with your own underwear in a hurry and didn’t hesitate to reach out for his hard-on. With you already straddling him, you took the base of his dick in your palm, placing on him the condom he passed you then slid onto him.
The two of you moaned in perfect sync once you sank down on him. You could come up with several perks of fucking Doyoung, but one of your favorites was that no matter how much he liked to whisper, he was a vocal moaner by nature. Doyoung was a master at silencing himself whenever he deemed it necessary, however you loved when he refused to restrain himself and even more that he was unashamed; he loved expression through sex and pleasure.
He sounded like an angel, too. It felt like traveling through a portal to heaven whenever Doyoung moaned your name.
Doyoung asked once you had adjusted, “How you feeling, baby?”
“Good,” you sighed out in bliss. He was so deep inside you that you could barely breathe. “And full.”
“Of course. You take it like no one before you, baby girl,” he praised, and all the while you felt like the room was spinning.
Doyoung was indirectly stating that you were a better fuck than his wife. You didn’t like to think about Doyoung fucking other people when it wasn’t movies, but there was a reason that he was balls deep inside you right now instead of her. Everything that she could do, he realized, you could do better. Much, much better.
Deflecting the attention, you asked, “How do you feel?”
“I’m good too, baby. You’re so fucking tight,” Doyoung growled with zero hesitation. He was so fucking hot. You saw him barely fighting the utmost smug grin when you clenched around him.
He was better than anyone else before him too, in every fashion. No one had ever made your skin swelter the way Doyoung had. He said a word or made a bare touch and it was as though your whole body was consumed by flames. Somehow he made every moment feel as blissful as the first time, and every touch grazed upon your flesh by his fingertips lingered on you for days. Memories of what you’d done always replayed in your mind until you could have another taste.
Doyoung couldn’t be paid to keep his hands off of you. He steered you with a single hand clutching your waist and the other played to its content on your chest, bearing in mind that you always loved when he touched you there. Your body was a diamond to him - beautiful and precious, and he never got bored of you. Doyoung had seen you bare and naked an ungodly amount of times before, but each time he fell endlessly in love with it over and over again. He was utterly sure that he could never get bored of fucking you, and the feeling that accompanied it.
He pressed kisses to your neck, murmuring in between, “You ride me so good, baby.”
You were certain that you could explode. Doyoung had too much power over the entirety of your body. He made your pussy throb but your heart hammer, and sometimes he made you so nervous you wanted to cower. But there was nowhere - nothing to hide. You were both naked and exposed, skin to skin, uncovering your deepest emotions with the sex.
There was nowhere to run and you didn’t want to be anywhere if it wasn’t beside him.
The rest of the day dragged on like that - you and Doyoung fucking each other’s brains out, taking turns with different positions. You’d fuck, take a break to do something productive, then ultimately wind up having sex again. There was no self control when it came to either of you, you couldn’t keep your hands to yourselves. 
And frankly, you didn't want to.
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As an actress, maybe facades should have been second nature to you. You were the daughter of a director and sucked into the industry due to nepotism - it should have been practically flowing in your bloodstream. But you underestimated just how hard pretending you weren’t hooking up with one of your dad’s friends was.
Especially his best friend.
The reason your dad trusted Doyoung so much was because they were close, having known one another since before you were even a thought meandering in your parents’ mind. Your dad mentored Doyoung since he was nine years old until he didn’t need it anymore. That also meant he was around you often - around your entire family. Including your dad. Ignoring the rhythm of your heartbeat when he was around you and the uneasy tension between you became easier with time, but subduing the feeling completely was impossible. Much less possible when he found ways to tease you in secret.
You were at a party at your dad’s house and Doyoung had been unabashedly eye-fucking you all evening long. That alone made it obvious what he wanted, but it was all in the way he touched you too. Locking arms with you and grazing his hands against you seductivelyf when no one else was looking. It was risky, but you had to admit, it made it a little fun.
By the time the party was over though, you were sure all that lust had dulled into fatigue. Doyoung looked worn-out and gone as he rested on the couch, the last of your guests and unable to drive home because of how much liquor he’d consumed. That was what you overheard him telling your dad, at least. He insisted on getting an Uber, but your dad told him to take the guest room and some Aspirin in the morning.
Doyoung pulled your dad in for a brief hug. “Thanks, Taeyong. See you in the morning.”
“Of course,” Taeyong replied. “And go easier on the alcohol next time. You know you can’t handle too much.”
“That’s rich coming from you,” Doyoung teased.
With a laugh, your dad patted him on the back and wished him goodnight, then went to join your mother in bed. You peered from around the corner, suspicion bottling up in your chest. It was possible that he was, but you didn’t want to be faced with the disappointment of it being true.
Arms folded across your chest, you asked, “You really drunk, babe?”
For a split second, Doyoung had looked surprised to hear you accusing him of feigning his intoxication. Then it wore off, and he chuckled. He looked around the hallway, and once he confirmed that you both were alone, admitted, “You caught me.”
You were a bit shocked to know that he was sober, but not that he’d feign inebriety - that didn’t surprise you. If Doyoung was set on having something he’d stop at almost nothing to get what he wanted. He did a damn good job at fooling everyone, too. You were under the impression that he was drunk and only confronted him for your own sake.
“Of course,” you murmured, then pressed, “May I ask your motive?” you had already known, but for some reason you wanted to lay down some cards to see what move he’d make.
Doyoung saw right through you, however. He always did. He leaned in and whispered, “Don’t play dumb with me, baby. You know exactly what my motive is.”
And like always, that had you ready to drop your panties in a heartbeat.
“Meet me in the guest room in 30,” he commanded, then turned away in the direction of said room.
No more than thirty minutes later, you were in bed with him. This time he was the one hovering above you, and it made you feel as though you were being preyed on - a billion times more susceptible to anything that he desired to do to your body and you loved it. Doyoung was in full reign. He always had been, but something different sparked whenever he was constantly making the moves for you.
“Want it?” Doyoung asked in between short-lived kisses, ones that never felt like enough no matter how many he pressed to your skin because he was adamant on not applying enough pressure to result in marking you. Lord knew it was all he ever wanted, but it was too risky. Not only would your family grow curious, public speculation would grow about a possible love affair.
You breathed out, “Need it.”
Doyoung chuckled, yet every sign of amusement faded the very moment he prodded the head of his dick inside you. There was nothing but sheer pleasure swarming his face like gloomy storm clouds. Reminding himself that you weren’t necessarily alone, he bit his lip to suppress the sounds he was ever so tempted to make.
You, on the other hand, subconsciously leaned towards the careless side. This wasn’t your first rodeo, but the problem was that the experience never dulled the more you had sex; it did the opposite. Each time was better than the last and you struggled to hide how much Doyoung aroused you. Every single touch, thrust, and whisper had you falling apart at the seams. You simply couldn’t resist emitting even the quietest of moans and although Doyoung loved hearing you moan for him, he needed you to keep your voice to a minimum.
“Shh,” Doyoung whispered, cupping his palm over your mouth as he looked you dead in the eye. “Don’t want your daddy to know that I’m fucking you limp, do you?”
You shook your head in vehement denial. Although the walls were thick and the guest bedroom and your parents bedroom were on entirely different wings, Doyoung still didn’t want to get too comfortable unless the house was completely vacanted. You didn’t blame him. It was much better to be safe than sorry.
“Then stop being a brat and shut your mouth before I have to do it for you.”
That tempted you to fuck around and find out what that entailed, but you wouldn’t take the risk here. Instead you bit down on your lip and squeezed your eyes shut whenever he made a sharp thrust.
Other noises that were beyond your individual control made it all too obvious that you were having sex. The slight creak of the bed and the slapping noise of your skin joining together whenever Doyoung thrusted his hips into yours. All it would take was someone wandering a little too close in proximity to the bedroom to tell what was going on, but as forementioned, your parents were on the opposite wing. That made it easier to focus on Doyoung. The way his mouth fell agape in silent moans or his teeth dug into his bottom lip to conceal his pleasure. The way his grip on your waist tightened whenever you clenched around him. Whatever it was he did, you were completely entranced by his reactions.
Doyoung only mirrored your awe as he watched the way your cunt swallowed him greedily. He could see the print of his bulge flat against your stomach and it sent him into overdrive. If anything, he only began pounding you harder in spite of the noise, leaving you to grip the sheets for dear life and let your eyes roll back.
“Always so tight for me,” Doyoung growled. “Don’t I fuck you enough?”
You whimpered in response as quietly as you could, “I need more.”
“My greedy little slut,” he sighed out in bliss, hips seemingly rocking into you deeper as he fulfilled your wish. Something about him claiming you as his possession was exhilarating to you. You were his greedy little slut. “Gonna fuck you all night long, baby.”
God, you knew he could. It wouldn’t be the first time Doyoung fucked you right into the mattress round after round, until you physically and mentally tapped out - and it damn sure wouldn’t be the last.
Having sex with Doyoung was everything nineteen-year-old you dreamed it would be, and then some. The movies had nothing on the real experience. They were graphic and arousing, but having Doyoung hold and touch you already made you feel as if your head was in the clouds. He made you feel wanted with his kisses and praises directed to you specifically, and the sexual tension between you was practically as good as the sex itself. Every moment with him was intimate and there was nothing better than being able to say that you had the Kim Doyoung in your sheets.
Then there also wasn’t some big explanation. Doyoung simply fucked you good and gave you sex on the ceiling. He knew your body inside out and was your greatest vice. It was natural that you were inclined to come back to someone who fucked you better than anyone else.
Doyoung’s pace began to quicken yet his thrusts became shallower, and by then - after the multiple occasions that you’d spent fucking and sucking the life out of one another - you knew well enough that it was a signal he was close. To say nothing of the moans you could tell he was struggling to contain. You weren’t any better yourself, feeling the knot inside you tightening. Both your bodies were aching for a release. 
“Cum for me,” Doyoung exhaled, the drive of his hips fiercer than ever. He was breathless, yet still relentlessly digging you deeper into the mattress without an ounce of mercy.
If nobody heard the two of you going at it all night long, you were sure that there’d be suspicions now that you were going to be walking with a limp.
You cried when you came, “Doyoung!” Your hands scrambled for something to anchor yourself on, anything, the grip of your finger’s moving to claw at his shoulders. Doyoung grimaced and fought a grunt, but it was no secret to you that he was a sucker for a little pain.
Doyoung’s body reacted to yours, releasing into the condom with profanities, followed by the gentle grunt of your name the moment he felt the tightening grip of your walls. You loved when he did that. There was something about Doyoung moaning your name that made you want to finish him all over again, in spite of your sensitivity fresh after orgasming in his hold. If it were possible, you would loop the sound in your brain.
His hips didn’t stop rocking into you even after either of you came, savoring his high until it faded into the post-euphoria of his orgasm. He tossed out the condom, making a mental note to dispose of it properly before he fell asleep, then climbed back in bed with you. “You did well,” he whispered once he joined your side again, embracing you and kissing your skin.
You smiled. “Tired?”
“Honestly? It’s been a long night. I needed this, baby.”
You figured as much. He was fucking you like he worked a nine to five and had a week-load worth of stress to unleash in your pussy. That either meant he was exhausted beyond belief and wanted to sleep, or that there was plenty more where that came from.
“You wanna know what I’ve been thinking?”
Your ears practically perked up. Doyoung’s thoughts were either interesting or dirty - or a deadly combination of both. “What’s on your mind?”
“I wanna cum in you so damn bad.”
You had a feeling that tonight was a “there’s more where that came from” kind of night.
Doyoung finishing inside you was something that both of you fantasized about from time to time, maybe a little more often. There were risks, however you did your best to stay safe - Doyoung got tested immediately after he found out his wife was cheating on him, and you were on birth control. You didn’t know when the last time him and his wife had sex was, but you doubted it was any time after he started fucking you. The condoms were a force of habit.
“You’re clean, right?”
Doyoung nodded in an instant.
“Then, why don’t you?”
“Oh, baby,” he growled. “Trust me, I would right now if this was my house.”
You almost moaned when he did that. You were turned on all over again, but it wasn’t like you had reached the point of being turned off in the first place. Things worked like that with Doyoung.
“Condom, no condom, I don’t care. Just fuck me,” you whined, desperate to feel him between your walls all over again.
Doyoung wore a smug grin, climbing back onto you without having to be told twice. “Told you, I’m gonna fuck you all night long.”
And he did.
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Misconceptions were popular amongst the lives of famous people, and Kim Doyoung was no exception. The public saw only what he was willing to expose - showing off his family and thanking the world for his endless amount of awards. No one would have guessed that a man who seemed to have such a picture-perfect lifestyle would ever be having an affair.
You and Doyoung were a long story. It started after Doyoung realized his wife was cheating on him with a D-list celebrity. By then they already had been arguing here and there, most of it being her fault. He told you that the only reason they hadn’t gone their own separate ways was for the sake of their child.
And then you came along. Unbeknownst to you at the time, Doyoung had always been aware of your attraction towards him. He found it cute but never thought too much of it until you were both casted together in Whisper, and having to work with you on such a sensual movie made tension between you light up in sparks. It wasn’t long before he confronted you, and even less before you got a taste of what people raved about endlessly in articles and on social media. You weren’t the only girl wondering what sex with Doyoung was like, but you were one of the few who would ever actually get to know the experience.
And goddamn, was it a heavenly one.
It really made you think. You’d have to be an absolute idiot to cheat on the fucking Kim Doyoung.
Tonight was the long-awaited movie premiere. Years of filming Whisper made you feel somewhat emotional, maybe because you could relate to your character all too well. The movie was so suspiciously accurate that you caught yourself reflecting and comparing the circumstances. It was a hell of a coincidence, but you knew that there was nothing more to it with the affair occuring only sometime after you’d been casted.
“You look breathtaking in this dress,” Doyoung told you after the red carpet photographs.
“Don’t flatter me,” you murmured, pretending that there weren’t butterflies swarming in your stomach. Your attraction to Doyoung may have grown beyond physical; a little more limitless than you’d like to admit. But that was a story for another day and another time.
Then, he leaned in and whispered, “You gonna let me take it off you tonight?”
You were glad that there was no more press around since you were on the way to the theater. Otherwise people might have caught onto what was a sensual moment for you. You tried your best to feign unbotheredness, but Doyoung left you hot and bothered and you couldn’t hide it.
Your mouth felt dry. “Y-yeah.”
Doyoung was amused. You were easily shy sometimes, yet also no questions asked to his wants. It was always fun seeing the effect he had on you and messing around on purpose just to get a kick out of it.
“I’ll send you a location. Have Mark take you there.”
Mark was your personal Uber - and the only person who knew what was happening between you and Doyoung. Thanks to Doyoung wanting to have car sex one time a year ago and not checking if you were alone, you winded up having to explain your situation to Mark, but he was shockingly understanding. There was no fear or doubt with him and it was a relief.
Doyoung walked off moments later, planting the seed that was growing in your brain. Seeing him dressed up only watered it, you thought he looked just as breathtaking as you were to him. Now you were thinking about getting naked and screwing Doyoung at some random location, and you had no idea how you were going to get through the movie premiere.
The next few hours were probably the longest of your life. They were exciting however, with all the positive reactions and feedback on the movie from your peers. There was dinner and socializing and while you were enjoying yourself tremendously and extremely proud of how the movie turned out, you needed Doyoung on such a greater level that nothing could satiate.
When it was finally time to leave, you hopped in the car and told Mark the location Doyoung had texted you via iMessage. Other than someone who simply worked for you, you also thought of Mark as a good friend. He was closer to your age than he was Doyoung’s, and was always fun to talk to.
“You and Doyoung going at it tonight, huh?”
You laughed. “When don’t we?”
Mark shrugged. It was a good question that he didn’t know the answer to, but he knew that it was none of his business. Unfortunately however, he sucked at minding his own.
“I, have a question…,” he started, sounding hesitant as ever, which only made you curious.
Curiously, you urged him. “Go on.”
“You and Doyoung,” he continued, still reluctant, as if he was taste testing his words before he said them. “Don’t shoot me, but is it just sex? Or have you guys caught feelings?”
Naturally, you opened your mouth to respond, but quickly closed it when you realized that you didn’t have an answer. The simple answer was on the tip of your tongue - Yes. But your relationship with Doyoung was so much more complicated than that, and you hated to think about how he felt towards you. You had been trying to accept that you weren’t supposed to be anything but a pretty plaything for him to run to whenever he was fed up with his wife and needed some relief. Gradually, you were becoming okay with that.
Yet another part of you was hungry for more. That was always how you were. Whenever you got what you wanted, it still wasn’t enough. You were too greedy and insatiable, and desired all the things that were bad for you.
Mark added when he caught onto your silence, “Forget it if I’m being invasive. I just saw you smiling out the window and all bubbly when I mentioned him and I got curious.”
“No, it’s okay,” you replied, although you felt like melting into the leather seat. One way or another, you guessed that you’d have to confront your emotions eventually. “To be honest… I think I do like him. And it’s sick because I don’t want to, I shouldn’t want to, I shouldn’t want him. But here we are, and I don’t think he feels the same.”
“I think he does.”
That made you snort. “You’re just saying that.”
“No, I’m deadass,” Mark said without a trace of a smile on his face as you watched him through the rear view mirror. “Do you see the way he looks at you?”
“Like he wants to fuck me? Yeah.”
“Like he wants you,” Mark corrected. “Like you hung up each fuckin’ star in the sky by hand. I can tell you guys don’t just want to fuck each other. You seem to enjoy each other’s company and with all the times I’ve had to witness you two sucking each other’s tongues in the back of this car I’d be damned if there wasn’t something there.”
You sat there in silent shock. When you thought about it, maybe Mark was correct. You fell in love with how gently and lovingly Doyoung treated you even outside of sex, but you never got your hopes up. Maybe it was just him having the decency to treat you well. Maybe it was the bare minimum that you were swooning over.
But Doyoung went above and beyond when it came to you. He cooked for you whenever you stayed over and held you longer than he needed to. He took you places and bought you things you wanted yet never needed. He seemed to always put you first and was honestly the most selfless person that you knew. That was what you loved about him. He always went the extra mile.
Damn it. You really did want Doyoung.
Mark pulled into the driveway some moments later, and you were surprised to see that your destination wasn’t too far from the venue. It was a nice house with a gate that you told him the code to, and you wondered who’s name it was in and why you hadn’t gone here sooner.
“I’m sorry about what you see,” you responded, a little too late, but Mark didn’t seem to mind. It was understood that you needed a moment to reflect.
Mark shrugged without a care in the world. He smiled and said, “It’s alright as long as I get to see you happy. Now go get him.”
You smiled back. Mark’s words always felt like a pat on the back.
When you rang the doorbell, Doyoung opened the door for you, offering you no time before he swooped you inside and pinned you against the door. You squealed, cut off by his lips latching onto your mouth as he kissed you breathless. You were getting deja vu, recalling the last time that this had happened.
“I have a feeling you missed me,” you said once he pulled you away and let you breathe.
Doyoung pecked your lips, smiling softly against them. “Always.”
Your heart fluttered at the feeling. After your talk with Mark you were now hyper aware of all the little things about Doyoung that you loved, and his cute smile was one of them.
In your attempt to distract yourself from your heartbeat you asked, “Where are we?”
“One of my brother’s houses. He’s not here frequently, said I could use it for the night.”
Even as a wealthy celebrity who thrived off of nepotism, you never understood the rich’s obsession with buying house after house just to hardly live in them. But in this moment you were grateful because it meant that you and Doyoung were all alone, and you could be as loud as and do whatever your hearts desired.
“Oh, I see,” you purred, threading your fingers through his hair. “You must want me screaming my lungs off tonight.”
Doyoung nodded his head. “And that’s not all. I went and got tested again. I haven’t slept with her in a while, or anyone else for that matter, but I just felt like it. It came back negative. I’m clean.”
There were a billion thoughts racing in your mind, and then some. You were throbbing at the idea of Doyoung fucking you raw alone, but to have the opportunity being presented to you was something entirely different. You wanted it. Bad.
“Fuck, you really wanna do this?”
“I really wanna fuck you,” Doyoung said. Then something in him seemed to falter. “Actually no. I don’t just wanna fuck you. I wanna make love to you. I don’t care if it sounds corny, you’re my everything, baby, and I wanna show you that I mean it.”
It took a moment for what he was implying to sink in, but when it did, you were ready. “Show me, then,” you stared him dead in the eye. “I can handle it.”
“I know you can, babe,” Doyoung growled, then crashed his lips back against yours. In the same timeframe you were undressing one another as he aided you to a room, unraveling in the midst of heated fervor.
Your dress landed in a heap on the floor, soon followed by your underwear until you were both stripped bare. You felt exposed, but in an exhilarating way. It meant he was free to do whatever he wished to your body.
Doyoung pinned you to the comforter then went for your skin like he always did, as though showering your body in warm kisses was a natural instinct. Something still felt different. He kissed you slower, gradually making progress down from your collarbone to your thighs. Taking his time to peck your weakest spots. He was showing your body - showing you love.
“Fuck, I wanna mark you so bad,” he said randomly, taking you by surprise. Doyoung had never intentionally marked you, the two of you fearing being suspected, or even caught. “We should get away. Go out of town for a while so that I can mark you, until they clear up.”
You giggled and threaded your fingers through his hair. “Now how would we do that in the middle of promotions - press appearances and interviews?”
Doyoung sighed. “Let me dream.”
That made you giggle again, and Doyoung smiled to himself at the sound. He loved everything about you and tonight, he was determined to show you exactly how much.
“Mark me where no one can see, but you. My body’s for your eyes only,” you told him. Your relationship was committed. You couldn’t even remember the last time you had slept with another person and the very moment you started sleeping with him, you had no reason to want to be with anyone else.
“If I start now, I don’t think I’ll be able to stop,” Doyoung warned.
You shrugged. “Then don’t.”
Tonight seemed to be full of reckless decision-making, and you were tempting him to make another one. It would possibly be the least rash of all the others to come, so when you decided that you didn’t care, he concluded that he didn’t either.
Doyoung’s lips always felt good on your skin, but having him suck and bite on you was incomparable. You felt like a teenager in love for the very first time, infatuated with this newfound feeling and dreading the end. Your breath was hitching as his mouth blemished your stomach, an array of marks forming delicately. Heat suffocated your body as the room seemed to only grow hotter, and you wondered if it was all in your mind or if he felt it too.
You were practically covered head to toe in red blotches when he was finished with you. For a while Doyoung watched your chest rise and fall rapidly with a proud glint in his eye, evidently pleased with his hard work. And nothing felt better than having traces of him all over your body. It felt scandalous, but you liked it.
He rose up to lean in your ear and ask, “I’m gonna eat you out now. Is that okay with you, baby?”
You nodded without wasting a moment of time. It was more than okay if you were being honest, you were needy for him and whatever bit of him you could get.
Doyoung was straight to the action when he positioned himself between your thighs, and the contrast from his previous slow-paced actions gave you whiplash. Your mouth parted open in a moan and you fixed your hands back on his black locks, observing on your back how his tongue moved relentlessly against you.
It was dangerous that he knew your body’s ins and outs. Doyoung had a superpower where he could see right through you. He knew what made you tick. He knew exactly where to touch you and where you were most sensitive. He knew the difference between what felt just good and what left your skin scorching with desire. You suspected that there was a blueprint to your body engraved behind his eyelids. Then again, after two years of this routine - sneaking away to screw one another until your bodies ached and maybe sometimes a little longer - it made sense that he had learned how your body worked.
And god, Doyoung loved how it responded to his touches. Your body always trembled a little, your thighs wavering as you struggled to handle the pleasure. Your breath got shallow and he was a sucker for the little exhales you emit whenever he did as little as touch you. You always reached out for something to clutch with all your might to help support yourself. You were tight as a bitch and there was never a dull moment being inside you. His mouth was watering at the mere thought of going bareback.
You cried as you felt close, “Doyoung, baby, fuck.”
“Let go,” he cooed, then his lips were back on your cunt.
There was no need for you to be told twice. Your grip on his hair tightened as you orgasmed, uncontrollably bucking up and grinding your hips into his mouth. A shriek came from your mouth as you finished, but Doyoung didn’t look like he was done with you just yet.
“One more time,” Doyoung said. He didn’t look willing to be deterred, already set on his mission before the words left his mouth. Still, he added tauntingly, “Unless, you can’t handle it.”
You fired immediately, “N-no, I can take it.”
Your squirming body and fucked out face betrayed your words, as well as the tremble in your voice, but Doyoung grinned condescendingly at how eager you still were to take everything that he was giving you.
“Good girl,” he cooed. Then his mouth was set back on your cunt.
Although the first one worked like a charm, Doyoung had a new tactic this round - fingering you. His ring and middle fingers prodded you, toying with your clit until he was satisfied with your whimpers and stuck them in. All at once his mouth was sucking on you, his nose nudging your clit and it had you soaring through cloud nine. There was something about the way Doyoung made you feel that was incomparable to any other emotion ever evoked within you.
You were still sensitive from your last orgasm, so every move Doyoung made had you at least twice as blissed out. You couldn’t help but emit a cry of his name at even the slightest of contact, quickly becoming overwhelmed by pleasure. To make matters worse (better), Doyoung was like a storm and refused to let up. There was no other option than for you to take everything he was offering to the best of your ability, to prove that you could handle him just as much as you claimed. You weren’t one to tap out too easily.
The pressure was too much. Quicker than before, you were yet again close to imploding. His quite literally handy work was enough to shove you over the edge, and you barely had the chance to warn him before you were thrown over it.
“I’m…” was all you could say before you were screaming, body convulsing as your orgasm fell upon you once more. It was the second time tonight, but deep inside you knew that it was still far from the last.
Doyoung finally showed you mercy and pulled away this time around, lips all wet by the time that he was finished. There was nothing that you could say that would convey how you felt. You could only lie there in silence with your chest heaving at rapid speed as you tried to endure your daze.
“Think you can still handle it?” He asked with a smile.
You were offended that he doubted you. “Try me.”
He didn’t wait around. Doyoung was lining himself up at your slit in mere seconds and the feeling of his tip brushing against it was making you drastically impatient. Moments like this made days without fucking him feel like weeks.
Finally he pushed into you, at a pace so slow it was almost agonizing. Doyoung leant his head back with a moan at that very moment, adjusting to the feeling of your bare walls. You felt tighter, wetter and warmer, and he already felt as if he could bust. Especially when you instantly clenched upon his entrance. One round definitely wasn’t going to be enough.
“S-shit,” you moaned, a clear waver in your voice. There was nothing else that you needed to say - your body definitely gave away how pleased you were to feel him. Your head lolled back against the pillow and you sighed in satisfaction.
As his hips rocked back and forth, the thoughts inside Doyoung’s brains only developed more and more, all of them centered around you. For one, he thought that there wasn’t a single word that could describe how beautiful you looked underneath him. Moonlight snook past the curtains and glimmered on your exposed skin, highlighting your breast and face. The fucked out expression you wore on your face only expanded his urge to keep you up all night, rocking into you slowly and steadily to savor the moment. The marks he left on you also bathed in the moonlight. That was all it took for Doyoung to lose his mind.
Second of all, Doyoung couldn’t fathom why he waited so long to fuck you raw. Sex with you would always be amazing regardless of what either of you chose to do, but he knew it’d be a lie to say that he didn’t prefer it this way. From the looks of it, you felt the exact same.
Doyoung swooped you into a sudden kiss, effectively cutting off your moans. You instead whimpered into his mouth with pleasant surprise, kissing him back with the same passion. When he was satisfied he pulled back and murmured, “You’re so beautiful, baby.”
His praise was your poison. You were addicted to him, intoxicated by him, and even if it was wrong you wouldn’t have it any other way. All your worries vanished when you had Doyoung by your side. When he touched you, you couldn’t even think of anyone - or anything - else besides him. You were all about him, and there wasn’t a single other person that could make you feel the way that he did. There wasn’t anyone who could please or satisfy you just like Doyoung.
You liked that Doyoung didn’t throw words around either. When he called you beautiful, he showed you that he meant it. His fingers and lips scattered around your body, hands grabbing your breast as his mouth sucked more marks into any available space. He meant it when he said that once he started, he wouldn’t be able to stop. To him, there was no such thing as enough.
That’s when you realized you and Doyoung may have mirrored one another. Too much greed in your hearts to ever be satiated, and perhaps that’s why you were a perfect match. You could attempt to drain one another completely, milk each other dry, and still never exhaust.
“You’re mine,” Doyoung whispered between pecks. “Tell me you’re mine.”
You stammered, “I’m yours.”
Doyoung moved his hand to your clit, fingers rubbing to their content. “Again.”
“I’m… I’m yours! I’m all yours, Doyoung,” you cried. You had meant it. Your body longed for him. After two entire years of this, you felt like your body belonged to him.
Satisfied, Doyoung kept up his actions. You were clueless as to how loud either of you were being in that moment. The bed creaked some and there was a loud smack whenever his hips slammed into yours, but you were only focused on Doyoung. Beads of sweat collected on his skin yet there wasn’t a hint of exhaustion on his face; only pleasure. His bare, sweaty chest glistened in the moonlight, and you desperately wanted to mark him back. Just like he’d done you.
It was too bad that he had someone to come back to. He may not have had sex with his wife, but there were other instances where she was bound to see his body and it was too risky. The only reason either of you cared was not because he was afraid of her finding out that he was cheating back, but because there was a chance that she’d put the pieces together. All it took was a name and you would be in hot water.
That thought made something in you sullen, and you had to dispose of the feeling quickly.
“You’re mine, too,” you said. “Right?”
Doyoung reached for your hand and slipped his fingers between yours. “I’m all yours, I promise. You’re my one and only.”
That was enough to placate you. Doyoung belonged to you and you belonged to him, you didn’t care what the documents said. He was all yours.
Now you were approaching your climax, and by the death grip Doyoung was currently holding on your hips you could tell that you weren’t alone. His moans were getting louder and it wouldn’t be long before he was ready to bust.
“Breed me, Doyoung, please,” you begged. You had reached a point of desperacy, rolling your hips into his to match his thrusts as you chased your orgasm. “Breed me, breed me, breed me.”
“Fuck,” Doyoung groaned. You were driving him crazy. It meant everything to know that you wanted this just as badly as he did. “I’m gonna give it all to you, babe.”
Your vision clouded with nothing but white when you reached your climax, squeezing Doyoung’s hand for leverage. As your limbs shook, your mouth gaped in moans but your cunt tightened around Doyoung. That was the last straw for him, the last push he needed. His moans resounded throughout the room as his warm cum coated your walls, filling you to your brim. He came a lot, but you weren’t complaining. The feeling of his seed inside you was ever so quickly becoming one of your favorites.
When he pulled out, Doyoung proudly watched how his cum trickled from you. He wanted to do it over and over again. The clock on the nightstand read two A.M., and that’s when he knew that this night was going to last until the morning.
“Wanted this ever since I first saw you with Daphne. You’re so good with her,” Doyoung said, and you vaguely recalled the time he was talking about. He was trying to keep her entertained and you happened to be fairly good with children. “Knew I had to put a baby in you. I’m gonna breed you for real one day. I promise.”
“Doyoung,” you whined.
He didn’t stop. “You want that, yeah? You want me to fuck you full of my cum?”
“Please,” you begged. “Don’t stop.”
He grinned. There was no plan of stopping.
By the time Doyoung did finally stop, it was early in the morning and the sun was beginning to peak from the horizon. You giggled when he finally tapped out and fell beside you, and grabbed his face to kiss him on his lips.
Doyoung smiled. “I love you.”
You froze for a moment. “You mean that?”
“From the bottom of my heart,” he said, then added, “It’s gonna be okay. We’ll figure shit out. All that matters is I got you and you got me, and I won’t let anything come between us.”
It felt like there was a wait lifted from your shoulders. You weren’t free to love him whenever or wherever, but you were free to love him however much you wanted. That made it feel okay.
You pecked his lips again. “I love you, too. I’ll wait for us.”
Doyoung held you in his arms. He could only say that you were like a daydream to him, everything he could have ever wanted wrapped into one. There wasn’t one damn thing about you that he didn’t adore. You made his heart sing and dance, and he hoped his body said everything that words could not. There was no way he could explain what he felt about you.
You and Doyoung’s love was straight out of a movie. And this was only the beginning to your chase for a happily ever after.
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xomakara · 7 months
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It Started With a Kiss
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SUMMARY |  You always spend your birthdays with DoJaeJung since your birthdays all land in the same month. After being friends and fuckbuddies with them for the longest, you're finally ready to have all three of them as your birthday present. PAIRINGS | DoJaeJung/Fem!Reader GENRE |  filthy smut, unprotected sex, dirty talk, slight dom/sub theme, oral sex, fingering, mouth stuffing, anal play, pet names, foursome(?) RATING |  Mature LENGTH |  6,277 words AUTHOR’S NOTE |  This was also sitting in my computer waiting to be uploaded LOL. I don't even know if I would call this a foursome...maybe? IDK, i normally write one on one smut so this was a bit of a challenge for me. Hope it turned okay.
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February 28 – Your Birthday
It was a quiet day until a knock sounded on your front door as you opened it to reveal Doyoung, Jaehyun, and Jungwoo. You frowned, the three NCT members making their way into your apartment, taking off their shoes and sliding their feet into the slippers that were reserved for them whenever they came over. You watched as they made their way towards your kitchen, the oldest of them pulling out a barstool from the counter island and the younger of the three opening the cabinet to pull out four coffee cups and start up the coffee maker.
“Not even a simple hi or anything?” You mumbled, watching them.
“Hi,” Jaehyun gives you a small hug and kiss before making his way towards the other two.
“Hey, Y/N.” Doyoung called out, patting the barstool next to him.
“Join us for some coffee.” Jungwoo gave you a mischievous grin. Why was he looking at you like that?
“Did we miss the memo that this is my apartment?” You muttered and shrugged, closing the door behind you, knowing full well that the other members of NCT would be knocking on your door sooner or later. No doubt with a large cake, balloons, and alcohol. “I’ll take tea instead, Jungwoo.”
You’ve been in the industry longer than any of the NCT members did and you thought it was your lucky day the moment that you met Doyoung. You remembered how he congratulated you on your comeback, made small talk about being fascinated that you were still active in the industry for such a long time. You met Jaehyun soon after while filming for a drama series, met Jungwoo while hosting a music show together, and then eventually you became friends with all of the members after running into each other in the apartment building where you all lived.
Once you found out that there were six NCT members that all had birthdays in February, Johnny had the smartest idea to celebrate everyone’s birthday all on one day. And it was decided that yours would be the day that they would celebrate it since you were the last one to have a February birthday and that it was the last day of the month, not including leap years.
Couldn’t you just have a simple birthday by yourself?
But then again, you always spent your birthdays alone before you met this bunch of chaotic men.
You had to admit that it was a nice change of pace even if you got annoyed by them every now and then.
You opened the door to the fridge and pulled out the container of coffee creamer and milk, putting them on the counter for whoever wanted what. It happened on most weeks when Doyoung, Jaehyun, Jungwoo, or DoJaeJung as you like to refer to them on most occasions, would come over to your apartment and hang out with you over coffee and TV. Out of all the members born in February, you had a closer relationship with them.
A more intimate friendship.
You had slept with Doyoung just once. You remember that first year where Johnny suggested that the February Gang celebrate everyone’s birthday on your birthday. You and Doyoung had snuck away from the party all tipsy and to avoid getting shit-faced drunk. You recall hanging out in Doyoung’s room, talking about random things, him leaning in and kissing you, you pulling at his clothes and before you knew it, you woke up in Doyoung’s bed the next morning. You remember the feel of his soft hands, the kisses on your body and you wanted a repeat of that.
You’ve never slept with Jungwoo as of yet. But you really, really wanted to. You accidently kissed Jungwoo during one of the music show shootings that you both hosted. It was meant to be a chaste kiss on the cheek but Jungwoo had suddenly turned his head and your lips landed on his. Since that day, Jungwoo would flirt and get handsy every chance he could get. Not that you would complain. His long fingers worked magic on your body.
You kissed Jaehyun because Mark dared you. You were at a party with the guys and one of the WayV guys decided truth and dare would be the perfect game to play. You knew it was just an excuse for the guys to try and attempt stuff with you or to hear your most crazy fantasies. So you decided to kiss Jaehyun not once, but twice, that night. One for the dare and the other because you really just wanted to kiss him. After the second kiss, Jaehyun made sure no one was around before dragging you to the bathroom and fucking you on the sink counter.
You’ve fucked Jaehyun the most.
He was just insatiable for you.
You never told them but you wanted to know how it would feel to have sex with all three of them. Would they agree to it? They obviously knew about each other but they’ve never disagreed about sharing you. Doyoung would hold your hands and kiss you on occasion, Jungwoo would get really handsy and Jaehyun always reached the limit of wanting to have sex with you. Even if the other two were in the room.
They seemed to be okay sharing you.
You stood next to Jaehyun, who handed you a mug filled with tea instead and brought it to your lips. The aromatic scent filled up your senses and you couldn’t help but sigh in contentment.
“What’s with that sigh?” Jaehyun asked, leaning against your counter as he watched you. “Sounds like you were quite satisfied.”
“Oh, shut up Jaehyun.” You mumbled, the male grinning from ear to ear. Doyoung had a smile on his face and began to sip his coffee from the comfort of your barstool. “I already know that I’m going to hate today. Please shoot me now.”
“Are you sure about that?” Jungwoo raised his eyebrows in a teasing manner. He was taking in your outfit−the short mini skirt, the too tight shirt that looked pretty sheer… were you even wearing a bra? “It’ll be a shame to see you go when you’re looking pretty sexy today.”
“I hate you, Kim Jungwoo.” You retorted, puffing out your cheeks.
Doyoung chuckled, noticing that Jaehyun had a smile on his face while watching you. What was he staring at? Looking in the same direction as Jaehyun, Doyoung coughed and looked away, gesturing to your outfit. “That’s short, Y/N.”
“Hmm?” You looked down at yourself and noticed that Doyoung was talking about the short mini skirt you had on. “What’s wrong with my skirt?”
“What’s not wrong with your skirt?” Jaehyun inputted as he looked you over once more. “You look fucking hot.”
“Please don’t change clothes on our account.” Jungwoo chuckled, watching as you flipped Jaehyun off.
Doyoung shrugged, refusing to look at your clothes. “I’m just saying. You’re going to be in an apartment filled with guys you know.”
“But it’s still my apartment. Plus, it’s my birthday. I get that Johnny wanted us all to celebrate today like we’ve been doing years already. But it’s still MY birthday. I still got to look good even though we’re just staying in.” You reminded him to which the older male nodded, muttering that he forgot. Feeling bold, you slid into Doyoung’s lap and wrapped your arms around his neck. “But Doyoung… Don’t you like the fact that it’s easy access to you know, fuck me?”
Doyoung raised an eyebrow. He was taken aback when you slid into his lap but when his hands laid on your hips, his eyes seemed to darken. “I’d rather have you wear that around us than the others.”
“Don’t pretend you don’t want to fuck me, you three.” You shrugged your shoulders at the three of them. You looked over to Jaehyun, noticing that he was staring intently at your blouse. “Tell me why we’re having the party at my place? We could’ve had it at one of your dorms. We all live in the same, damn building.”
“Our place is crowded with a crap load of stuff.” Jaehyun slowly teared his gaze away from your clothed upper body. “When you have loads of guys living together, it gets crowded even if we clean the place up.”
“Well the boys in the other dorm claim their apartment is clean but I doubt it.” Doyoung muttered, looking everywhere but at you. It was taking all the energy he had to not succumb to whatever emotions he was having. “Johnny thought it was a great idea to use your place. It’s just you in this big, humongous apartment.”
“Plus, I don’t think you want to find all the porn that’s probably scattered about the dorms.” Jungwoo inputted, grinning as you raised your fist at him. “I mean if you’d like to see our sexual preferences, be our guest.”
“I know all of Jaehyun’s kinky preferences, so I’m not worried.” You winked at Jaehyun. Giving Jungwoo a cheeky smile, you said, “What kind of kinks do you have Jungwoo? Show them to me?”
“Really?” Jaehyun chuckled, a finger running along your arm. “C’mon, Y/N. Today’s your birthday. Can’t you be nice for once?”
“I’m always nice!” You exclaimed, giving him a frown. “I’m so nice that I’m literally offering up myself to you three and you guys aren’t doing anything about it.”
Jaehyun raised his eyebrows, a small smile coming to his lips. “Tempting as that sounds…”
“Come on!” You whined, sliding off of Doyung’s lap. “Can’t we just tell the others that the party is cancelled because I just want to spend it with you three?”
“And do what, baby?” Jungwoo asked, his eyes looking your body up and down. “Did you just want to fuck?”
“Now, now, kitten. As much as I want to get my hands on you, it’ll have to wait.” Doyoung shook his head in amusement. Kitten? Why did it sound so sexy when he called you kitten? “Can you be a good girl for us? The others will be here any time soon.”
“We can discuss this later, princess.” Jaehyun nodded his head, leaning forward to kiss you. “And then we can reward you if you’ve been a good girl.”
“Okay…” You huffed and crossed your arms over your chest, the fabric of your shirt clinging to every curve of your body. It took forever for Jaehyun to tear his gaze away from you and when he did, he excused himself to use the restroom. 
Doyoung got up from his seat and turned to you, a curious look on his face. “You really want to have sex with all three of us?”
“Yeah…” You sang, looking at him. You bit your bottom lip. “I thought about this for a long time, Doyoung. I want you all to fuck me. That's my birthday wish.”
“Fuck, baby.” Jungwoo ran a hand through his hair. “You’re killing me over here.”
“Jungwoo…” You trailed off, your hands at the waistband of his jeans. “Please, please can I suck you off?”
“I thought we agreed that if you were a good girl for us, we’d reward you?” Jungwoo raised an eyebrow, looking down at your lustful face. “You’re not being very good right now, baby.”
Doyoung lightly pulled you away from Jungwoo, his hands coming to rest on your ass. “You’re absolutely wet for us, aren’t you kitten? Wearing next to nothing underneath that outfit.”
“How did you know what I was wearing underneath?”
He let out an amused sigh. “Who was the one that accidently sent me a text of that semi-nude pic that was meant for Jaehyun?”
“Shit, I forgot about that.” You cursed yourself and face-palmed your forehead. You looked at Doyoung and Jungwoo, your face stating the fact that you were indeed sleeping with Jaehyun on more than one account. “I’m so horny for you three. I don’t know if I could behave.”
“Yes you can, baby.” Jungwoo answered, his thumb caressing your top lip.
Doyoung grabbed his phone from his pocket and raised an eyebrow, his fingers flying over the screen. He looked at you and gestured to the front door. “I’m going to head out for a bit. Johnny just texted me and said he needs help carrying things over to your place. Come on Jungwoo.”
“Does he still need an extra hand to carry things?” You shook your head and followed the men to the front door. “There’s seventeen other guys and still need you to help him? What the hell did they buy? The whole store?”
“Knowing them, probably.” Doyoung shrugged, pulling on his shoes. He nodded back at your apartment. “Don’t be doing naughty things while I’m gone.”
“Be our good girl.” Jungwoo added.
“I’ll be good.” You answered, watching as they cackled, their backs retreating out of sight. You shook your head, closed the door behind you and turned towards the living room. At the same time, Jaehyun opened the bathroom door and looked around, trying to locate Doyoung and Jungwoo.
“Where did the other two go?” He asked, his face in confusion.
“They went to go help Johnny .” You replied, going up to him and wrapping your arms around his neck. “Something about needing help carrying things? I think the boys bought the whole store.”
“Well that can’t be helped.” Jaehyun chuckled, his hands coming to wrap around your waist. “I finally get to have you alone now.”
You chuckled, looking up at him softly. “Were you waiting for them to leave this whole time?”
Jaehyun eyed you over, his fingers teasingly touching your bare skin as he slid them up your shirt from your waist. “With that outfit on? I’ve been dying to take you here and now.”
“I’m supposed to be a good girl, though.” You replied, cupping his cheek. You stared at his deep dark orbs. “As much as I would love you to fuck the living daylights out of me, the boys will be here anytime soon. And I actually want you all to fuck me. But first I should change.”
“What? Why?” Jaehyun bit his lower lip. He followed you to your bedroom and paused when he noticed that you began to undress. “But you looked so good in that outfit.”
“Of course I did.” You gazed back at him as he took in the state of your undress. You were shrugging out of your shirt and threw a plaid buttoned down shirt over your shoulders. You left the buttons undone, a sheer bralette covering your assets.
“Is that my shirt you’re wearing?” Jaehyun questioned from behind you.
“Yep! You left it here a few days ago and I haven’t done laundry and your shirt was somewhat clean.” You replied, swinging the hem of his shirt about. “Does it look good on me?”
“That explains why I couldn’t find it this morning.” He leaned against the door frame, crossing his arms across his chest and had to admit that you looked damn good in his shirt. His eyes widened when he noticed your sheer bralette and the fact that his shirt was hanging loosely on your body. “That’s not exactly a bra Y/N. Were you being a little adventurous or something?”
“You didn’t answer my question.” You chuckled and turned to face him, the cool air hitting your naked skin that wasn’t covered by clothes. “And it’s still a bra Jaehyun. Although it doesn’t offer that much protection.”
“I’m just saying...” He chuckled, throwing his head back in laughter. “Like something as thin as that could contain those massive tits of yours. But I really, really like it.”
“You’re such an idiot, Jaehyun.” You chuckled along with him. “Why did you think I wore it today?”
Most girls would have normally covered themselves and screamed their heads off when a guy would catch them half-naked. This case was completely different since Doyoung, Jaehyun and Jungwoo often caught you changing and although it bothered them the first couple of times, they’ve gotten used to the fact that you often roam your apartment with little to no clothes on. 
One of the few perks of living alone you told them. You made some rules that since it was your apartment, you could be naked (or at least little clothed) from the waist up whenever you want, and that they should just get used to it. Jaehyun adapted quite well and so did the other two, but occasionally Doyoung would still blush when he would see you walking around in a bra.
“You gonna cover up?” Jaehyun asked as he reached your sides in a matter of seconds and took the sides of his shirts to start buttoning up the fabric. He slid one hand under the shirt you wore as he caressed your naked skin softly.
“I have no choice since you’re already buttoning it up. Don’t want the others to see my massive tits huh?” You teased him, watching as his eyes turned hazy with lust. Normally Jaehyun was the one to tease you non-stop but there were times when you got the upper hand. You started to undo the zipper to your short mini skirt and shimmied out of it, only to throw on some dark jeans. “Don’t you only want me for yourself?”
He studied you, his eyes scanning the sleek lines of your body. “I do want you for myself. But I see the way Doyoung and Jungwoo look at you.”
“Really?”
“Do you like them?”
“Of course I like them.” You turned to him. “Why do you ask?”
“I don’t know. The looks they give you when you’re not looking. Doyoung has that kind and gentle nature, Jungwoo is mischievous just like you. And those smiles you give them. I don’t know what to think.” Jaehyun shook his head. He placed his hands on your shoulder, looking down at you, capturing your attention. “I know we’re not dating or anything so I can’t really tell you who you can or can’t fuck.”
“So you’re okay with sharing me?”
He nodded, cupping your face to make you look at him. “If you want to be shared, then anything for you, princess.”
“So…”
“Noona! We’re here!”
“Y/N! Where do you want me to put the drinks?”
“Where’s your Bluetooth speaker at noona!?”
“Oh, the others are here.” Jaehyun pulled away and gave you a small smile. “Remember to be good if you want all of us, princess.”
You followed him out to the living room where it was crowded by all twenty members of NCT. When the boys saw you, they started to sing in celebration of your birthday. 
After a while, Doyoung and Jungwoo pulled Jaehyun to the side when they saw you conversing with Johnny and Ten. Doyoung looked at you in concern before looking at the younger man. “Are we sure we want to do this?”
“I’m totally fine with it,” Jaehyun answered.
“She’s been such a good girl for us, Doyoung.” Jungwoo said. “It’s her birthday and that’s probably what she wanted as a gift.”
“How did we all end up lusting after the same girl?” Doyoung asked, running a hand through his thick hair. “Not that I’m complaining. Thinking about fucking her with you two…sounds pretty hot.”
Jaehyun let out a chuckle before coming towards you. He turned to face you, only to plant a kiss on your forehead in front of the other NCT members. “Happy birthday, princess.”
Your eyes wide, you touched your forehead. “What was that for?”
“It’s your birthday. I think you deserve it.” Doyoung grinned as he joined the group.
You narrowed your eyes. “What are you guys planning?”
“Your after party.” Jungwoo whispered in your ear, silently motioning to you, him, Doyoung and Jaehyun. “You’ve been such a good girl and I think it’s time to reward you.”
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"Jungwoo, please..." 
You had your back to your bedroom door as you rode on Jungwoo’s thigh. You were both kissing, Jungwoo running a hand down your leg, his fingers slipping beneath the fabric of your shirt to meet with delectable skin. You were on fire, skin burning every time he brushed his fingers over your tantalizing flesh. Your arms were wrapped around his neck, your lips to his, your chest plastered against his. The magic was unbearable.
Doyoung and Jaehyun were still in your living room trying to shoo everyone out. The others were complaining, Mark mostly accusing the guys of wanting to fuck your brains out.
Jungwoo helped you shimmy off your jeans before he slipped a finger underneath your panties, and slid it against your already wet pussy. He teased, his thumb coming to rub your sweet spot, eliciting moans from you. You clutched his shoulders, your body arching against him, your head thrown back. You bit on your lower lip to keep from screaming out loud.
"You know you wanna scream, babe..." Jungwoo whispered against your ear, as he slipped his finger in you. “Scream so that Doyoung and Jaehyun can hear your pretty voice.”
You panted, Jungwoo’s finger slowly pumping into you. "Oh god, Jungwoo."
Jungwoo slowly removed his finger from your pussy, your juices covering his digit. He lifted his finger to his lips and in one long flick of his tongue, he tasted your sweetness.
"Baby, you taste good. Real good~" Jungwoo muttered.
"I was thinking..." You started as you went up to him and slid your hand down his chest, your fingers drawing his shirt up over his head.
Jungwoo looked oddly amused as he unbuttoned his jeans and helped you slide the fabric off. "You were thinking?"
"I was thinking about what I wanted you all to do to me tonight." You stood on your toes and kissed the side of his lips, hands sliding his boxers off. You then trailed your hands along your body, removing pieces of your own clothing one by one. "I wanna take charge tonight..."
"Is that what you want, babe?" Jungwoo asked, giving up as you pushed him towards the bed. The back of his legs hit the edge of the bed, his legs giving way as he suddenly sat on it.
You were aware that Doyoung and Jaehyun were finally in your bedroom. You heard the sound of clothes being removed and thrown around your bedroom. “Yeah. I want to suck your cock and then have you fuck me, Jungwoo. I want Doyoung to eat me out and then fuck my pussy. And I want Jaehyun to fuck my ass.”
“Fuck that’s hot.” Jaehyun muttered, leaning back against the wall as he watched you kneel in front of Jungwoo. Doyoung, still with his pants on, had sat in your vanity chair, his hand cupping his hard on. 
"Show me, Jungwoo. Teach me how to please you." You looked up at Jungwoo.
"Touch me, Y/N. Baby, touch me where it hurts the most." Jungwoo moaned out, his hands balled into fists at his sides as you let your hands slide down his tight belly to enclose his surging cock. Jungwoo stiffened involuntarily and inhaled sharply. His balled fists got tighter, his short nails digging into his palms. His eyes slipped closed in sweet agony.
But he didn't stop you or joined in the fun.
Jungwoo sat there unmoving and allowed you to examine, caress and toy with him to your heart's content. It was the strangest of emotions. He had to hand it to you, you never failed to surprise him. When he was with other girls, he had fucked in about every possible position known to man, but he had never done this. He had never sat bare-assed and unmoving while a beautiful naked young woman made him her own personal plaything, driving him out of his mind with her searching hands and incredible body.
Jungwoo let out a sigh of relief when your hands released him. Fighting the powerful impulse to drag you on the bed, take you and hammer forcefully into you, he bit the inside of his jaw when you scooted down his body.
He drew a sharp intake of air when you impulsively lowered your face and brushed a butterfly kiss to the smooth head of his penis. It jerked against your lips and you lifted your head.
"I could," you started, "lick my fingers and make you wet. Or, I could simply lick you wet with my tongue. Which one?"
His breath dangerously short, Jungwoo tried to speak, to tell you it wasn't necessary, that he felt wet already from your explorations. But he didn't say a word. More than anything he wanted to feel your lips and tongue on him. At the same time he was afraid he would cum if he allowed it.
Finally he said, "No, baby, I-"
But you didn't listen.
Delicately, taking great care not to hurt him, you bent to him, put out your tongue and licked lightly upward, all the way from the base to the tip. A great burst of air rushed out of Jungwoo’s tight lungs and he anxiously grabbed your arms and pulled you up.
"I thought you would like that," you said, your brown eyes afire.
"I do like it," he said. "Too much, in fact."
You smiled and laid a gentle hand on the hard flesh you had just licked. "Can I?"
"Go on," he croaked and placed nervous hands on your thighs.
"Watch to make sure I do it right." You said, your voice in a whisper.
"Fuck baby," he ground out.
Choking with sensual excitement, Jungwoo watched unblinking as you raised onto your knees on the bed to straddle him, wrapped a gentle hand around his rigid cock and carefully placed the tip just inside of you. You took your hand away and slowly, sensuously, lowered yourself onto him.
"Ahhh," Jungwoo groaned as he easily slid up into your warmth.
"Oh fuck, Jungwoo." She echoed his ecstasy.
Matching Jungwoo’s lust with your own, you gripped his ribs and began the erotic, rolling motion of your hips. Thrusting, you held him prisoner with your strong gripping thighs, pounded him with your rocking pelvis, punished him with your gyrating hips.
You could hear Jaehyun moaning and Doyoung’s soft gasps in the background as you continued to ride Jungwoo.
Loving it, loving you, Jungwoo reveled in this wild, uninhibited display of fierce sexual hunger. A deep, powerful hunger that matched his own and lifted him to new heights of carnal pleasure.
Flexing the muscles of his ass, driving rhythmically into you to meet each of your frenzied thrusts, Jungwoo watched you and was as excited by the sight as the feel of you. Your hair whipped around your face and shoulders, a damp lock clinging to your cheek. Your breasts, with their tightened nipples, danced and swayed with your sensual movements. And between your gripping thighs, the damped black curls were meshed with the black coils of his groin.
Such a powerful aphrodisiac.
"Jungwoo, Jungwoo..." You began to chant his name as you panted anxiously.
"Yes, baby," he groaned out, grateful your release was at hand, knowing that he couldn't last much longer.
"Oh, oh, oh!" You gasped as he gripped your thighs and speeded his movements, driving into you, triggering your deep and lingering orgasm. “Fuck!”
For several long seconds, you were lost in the throes of a shattering release, out of control, begging Jungwoo for an end to a joy so intense you could stand it no longer.
The fervent squeezing of your burning body took Jungwoo with you into paradise. His deep groans matched your whimpering cries as together you both attained the ultimate in ecstasy.
When it subsided, you sagged down onto Jungwoo's chest and fought to regain your lost breath. When finally your intermingled heartbeats slowed and he could breathe freely again, a happy Jungwoo grinned and teased, "Hmm... that was a good ride huh?"
You let out a laugh, eyes sparking with amusement. "The best ride of my life."
Jungwoo winked at you and turned your bodies towards the mattress, laying you on your back. "Ready for more fun? The night isn’t over yet, baby."
"Mmhm..." You moaned as Doyoung replaced Jungwoo’s spot. You hooked your legs around his waist, his cock getting big. 
“My turn now, kitten.” Doyoung latched his lips onto your nipple, suckling them, licking them, tugging at them. Your body was on fire again as you clutched at his shoulders tightly and looked into his lust filled eyes.
Suddenly and without warning, Doyoung bent his head down and kissed you. A kiss that captured your breath, weakened your knees, and caused a pulsing in your lower regions.
Your hands trailed up to his chest to link at the back of his neck. You tried to pull him closer but was startled when he cupped his hands around your buttocks, pressing so close that you could feel the length of his arousal.
Doyoung continued to ravage your lips. You tore your lips away and softly whispered, "I want you to go down on me, Doyoung."
He smirked, his hands at your waist so fast, so willing. “I can do that.”
He followed you, your lips kissing your mouth, trailing to your jaw, down your neck, your shoulders, the valley of vast skin above your breasts. Doyoung trailed kisses down your stomach, his hands spreading your legs further apart as his lips reached the springy dark curls guarding your sweet pussy. He sniffed the scent of you before slipping his middle finger into your wetness, his other hand creeping up along your body to cup your breasts, kneading them, grazing your swollen nipples. He watched your response as he thrusted his finger in and out of you. Your eyes were close, lips parted slightly, hands fisting the sheets.
“Ah... Doyoung...” Your moans escaped you. The feel of his hand on your breasts was wonderful but the feeling of his hand down on your pussy was magical. You couldn't explain what you were feeling, what he made you feel.
His finger still in you, Doyoung placed his mouth on your swollen, pulsing pussy, giving you great pleasure as he licked and laved, and gently tugged. He added another finger into you, thrusting a couple of times before removing them and replacing them with his mouth and tongue.
“Fuck, ah!” You yelled out as you felt his tongue. He slid his tongue into your warm, wet flesh and swirled it around, his mouth sucking, making you wetter. He felt you tense and he didn't want you to come just yet.
At least not without him.
Doyoung rose above you, positioning himself between your legs, his arms resting on the pillow beside your head. He gazed into your lust fogged eyes. “Are you ready for me, kitten?”
You glared at him. “Just hurry and fuck me, Doyoung.”
Understanding your meaning and chuckling, he lowered his rockhard cock into your sweet, succulent warmth. He stopped before burying himself the hilt, giving time to adjust to his size. He felt you squeezing your inner walls as he continued to stretch you, invade you.
Breathing heavily, Doyoung panted, “Fuck...”
You grasped his shoulders and bit his neck. It was all the permission he needed as he drove himself home, his length finally buried in your pussy. Doyoung retreated his cock out of you then slammed back in, only to repeat the process all over. There was a jolt of pleasure as his hips grinded against yours. You wrapped your legs around his waist, lips meeting for a kiss.
It was a heated kiss as he continued to thrust. You matched his movements, your hips moving to match his rhythm. Kissing his way to your breasts, he latched onto a nipple and you cried out, hugging his head to your chest. The pleasure was too much for you, that she tensed and cried out his name.
“Doyoung!” You climaxed, holding him in your arms. 
Doyoung felt you tense. He continued to thrust up in you, going in deeper, harder, faster. He heard you cry out, feeling your love juices leaking from your body. Then he thrusted into you one last time before spilling himself in you. 
Before making you his one and only.
He collapsed on you, head on your shoulders. Opening your eyes, you smiled. "I don't think I can move now...”
"I can't move either." Doyoung lifted himself on his elbows to look at you. He kissed your shoulders and then your lips. “But you still have to give Jaehyun what he wants, kitten.”
Doyoung moved to join Jungwoo who was sitting in the corner, watching with interest. Jungwoo was clearly geting off watching you fuck other men.
Jaehyun approached the bed, lips in a mischievous smile. “Fuck princess. Just watching Jungwoo and Doyoung fuck you hard like that, was hot.”
Jaehyun stared at you, his dark brown eyes gazing into your own. He imprisoned them, as he brought his lips down against yours. A jolt slammed through your entire nervous system, your eyes closed, and his lips began to move, thoroughly and possessively exploring each tender curve.
Jaehyun felt your lips soften involuntarily, felt your arms give way, your breasts coming to rest against his chest. One of his hands, which was holding your wrist, lightened its pressure at the same time his lips increased theirs. He deepened the kiss, his other hand shifting soothingly over your sides and hip. He slid the tip of his tongue along the crease of your lips, seeking entrance, insisting that they part, and when they finally did, his tongue plunged into the sweetness of your mouth and slowly withdrew, then plunged again in blatant imitation of the act he was beginning to crave with dangerous determination.
You  gasped beneath him, stiffening, and then suddenly all the tension poured through you. He was a lover now- ardent, persuasive, gentle, wanting. Tenderness overwhelmed you and, with a silent moan a helpless surrender, you curled your hand around his neck, lips moving on with awakening ardor.
Jaehyun’s mouth became more demanding, his tongue seeking, stroking, while his hand slid restlessly up your naked body, caressing your breast, then down again...
“All I wanted was to squeeze this nice round ass of yours,” He muttered as his hands slid down and around, closed over your bare ass; he kneaded, and heat raced across your skin. Fever followed, a hot urgent ache that swelled and grew as he evocatively plundered your mouth, as he held you close, lifted your hips against him, and suggestively molded your softness to the rigid line of his erection.
You moaned, hot, hungry, and wanting.
Wanton. Eager. Determined.
Your breaths mingled, heated and urgent; from beneath heavy lids, your eyes met, held.
Locked as he shifted his hand and touched you. Stroked and caressed, intimately traced. Your breasts rose and fell; your teeth closed on your lower lip as he opened you. As he teased, glorifying in the slick heat of your body, then slowly, deliberately, slid one long finger into your ass. Then he slipped another in with the first, thrust deeper, faster.
“Oh fuck, Jaehyun.”
He settled between your legs, spreading you wide. Removing his fingers, he shifted his position, caught one of your knees, and lifted your leg to his hip. Set it there, then traced back with his palm, around, until he found you slick and swollen, hot and ready.
And then he was pressing into you, hard, hot, and much larger than usual. Your lungs seized. You felt your body stretching, him pressing inexorably in.
Your body arched as he did, bowed, tightened, tensed against his invasion. You felt the restriction, felt the pressure build, but he didn't stop; he pressed deeper, deeper until he surged through to the hilt.
"Did you get bigger, Jaehyun?" You gasped. “Did seeing Jungwoo and Doyoung fuck me get you turned on?”
He chuckled and then he moved. He filled you, sank into your body, sheathed himself in your heat. You arched upward with loud moans. Stunning pleasures built inside you, gaining intensity...waited on the brink of passion as Jaehyun continued to thrust in you, harder, deeper, faster, skin slapping on skin. “Fuck princess…your ass is so tight. Look at how it’s squeezing my cock.”
"Dammit, Jaehyun!! More!" You screamed out.
"And?" He withdrew from you, the tip of his length just barely in you.
"Just fuck me hard, deep, and fast, Jaehyun!!" You exclaimed, nails digging into his shoulders. You wrapped your legs around his hips, bringing your pussy closer to his body. The action made him drive in deeper, faster and harder. He continued ramming into your ass, his fingers thrusting into your pussy, soon spilling his cum into your body. He still thrust into you, ever so slowly, riding his climax out to the end before slowly pulling out and collasping on you.
You both held each other in your arms, Jaehyun kissing your forehead, while you rained kisses on his chin.
"That…" You sighed as you burrowed yourself further into his arms, motioning for Jungwoo and Doyoung to join you on the bed. “...was the best sex I’ve had hands down.”
"Round two?" Jungwoo asked, stroking the side of your hips as he laid next to you.
"It depends. Are you willing to let me take charge again?" You asked, your eyes twinkling.
"If this means us getting to fuck like this again…" Doyoung muttered, kissing your temple.
You nudged him. "So that means you’re all okay with sharing me?"
Jaehyun’s laugh was deep and contagious. "Anything you want, princess. It’s yours."
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hannie-dul-set · 1 month
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fuck you, aphrodite! [1].
SYNOPSIS. ready, set— let the love games begin! the cupid industry is a competitive business. donghyuck, jeno, and johnny know that very well. right on the cusp of their sweet, sweet promotion (and finally graduating from petty match-making and making sure their assignments finally fucking hook up), the three find themselves in a three-way battle because for their last assignment, the love lottery just had to give them the same person to manipulate into falling in love with their respective assignments— you.
PAIRINGS. kim doyoung, na jaemin, jung jaehyun x fem! reader. TAGS. socmed! au, cupid! au, college! au, org! au, another reverse harem of weird/asshole/loser men! the hannie-dul-set holy trinity of leading men! rom-com, explicit language and jokes.
NOTE. it's been a hot hot minute since i wrote for nct again 😭 and to think it's gonna be a train wreck, hot mess that i impulsively vomited out instead of doing my readings HUAHUHA this is just a fun funky little things so updates will be whenever i feel like it (if any) so pls lmk if you wanna be tagged the future! enjoy!
[part 1] [part 2]
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fuck you, aphrodite! © hannie-dul-set, 2024.
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writemekpop · 3 months
Text
Sinner | Kim Doyoung
Summary: You dress up as a Catholic school girl in order to spice up your sex life. How will your husband Doyoung react when he sees you?  
Genre: established relationship AU, angsty
Word count: 1.2k
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“You can do this,” you told yourself, as you stared at your reflection in the bathroom mirror. 
You barely recognised the girl looking back at you. Your hair was tied into two pigtails, and pink gloss dolled your lips. You were wearing a cropped white shirt that barely covered your breasts, and a short tartan skirt. You put on the final touch – a golden crucifix necklace. 
You’d normally never resort to sexy costumes, but you and your husband Doyoung hadn’t had sex in months. 
You walked to the bathroom door. 
You put on your sexiest voice. “Forgive me, father, for I have sinned. I’ve been a bad bad girl… who needs to be punished.” 
Doyoung didn’t reply. You frowned, but quickly plastered on a smile. 
Spinning around, you came out from the bathroom. 
Doyoung was nestled under the covers, his reading glasses low on his nose, buried in a book. He hadn’t noticed you walk in. 
You cleared your throat. 
Doyoung looked up. When he saw you, he burst out into laughter.
“What the hell are you wearing?” 
Your face fell. “Do you not… like it?” 
Doyoung clutched his tummy, still in fits of laughter. “Is that a fake cross?” 
“No, Doyoung, I’m being - this is supposed to be - sexy.” The words died on your lips. 
Doyoung sat up straight. “This isn’t a joke? Are you supposed to be some kind of… catholic schoolgirl?” 
You could feel your cheeks warming. Suddenly the scratchy polyester of your shirt felt suffocating. 
“Well… yeah,” you said. “I thought you’d like it.” 
Doyoung’s mouth fell open. 
“Why would you ever think I’d find that sexy? You look… ridiculous!” 
You gasped. You dashed into the bathroom, slamming the door shut. 
Yanking the cross necklace off, you slid down onto the floor and started to cry. You couldn’t believe how stupid you’d been. You wished you’d never been born.
You could hear Doyoung knock on the other side of the door. 
“I’m sorry, Y/n. I didn’t realise you were being serious!”
“Go away,” you yelled. 
Doyoung rattled the door handle. “I didn’t mean to be rude! I was just in shock. Please just open the door, baby.”
You let out a shaky breath. Then, you pulled the door open to face your husband. 
Doyoung looked effortlessly handsome in his plain white T shirt and freshly showered hair. The sight made you angry. You wrapped your hands across your exposed chest. 
Doyoung touched your cheek lovingly. “What’s gotten into you, Y/n?” 
“Can’t you see? I’m trying to spice up our marriage! Doyoung, you won’t look at me anymore, let alone have sex with me. I can’t remember the last time we even kissed, not a peck, but a proper kiss, with tongues.”
Doyoung sighed. “Is that what all this is about? Y/n, I love our life, it’s comfortable. We don’t have to try around each other, we can just be… us.” 
“I want that rush. Like we used to be… remember when we first got married? We could barely keep our hands off each other. I want to feel… desired.” 
Doyoung stayed silent. 
“Did you hear what I said?” you asked. 
Doyoung bit his lip, trying to suppress his laughter. “I’m sorry, it’s really hard to take you seriously when you look like that. Can you put a robe on or something?”
You pulled off the costume and put in in the bin. Then, you pushed past Doyoung and walked towards the front door. 
Doyoung followed you out into the hallway. He watched as you put on your coat and shoes. “Where are you going?” 
“My sister’s place,” you snapped. 
Doyoung tugged his hand through his soft hair. “Don’t be like this, Y/n. It’s the middle of the night. Just come back and we’ll talk about this.” 
You shook your head. “You had your chance.”           
You slammed the door behind you.
---
The next day, you expected to find dozens of missed calls and texts from Doyoung, but your phone was empty. 
Your heart twinged. Not even one measly voicemail from the love of your life? You brushed aside your embarrassment and started off home. 
Before you made it back to your apartment, you bumped into Doyoung in the street. 
He was wearing a long brown coat, one that went down all the way to his ankles. His cheeks were flushed, and his hair was all over the place. 
“What are you doing out here?” 
“I came to find you. My phone died and I lost my charger,” Doyoung said, panting. “I’m really sorry about last night.” 
You stared at the pavement, still too embarrassed to meet your husband’s eye. “I thought you’d like the costume… I guess I was wrong.”
Doyoung shook his head. “I don’t like the costume, I like you. I’m sorry I don’t make much of an effort, it’s not because I don’t desire you… because believe me, I do.” 
You met his warm chocolate eyes. In them was nothing but love. 
“I shouldn’t have laughed at you. I’m flattered that you made such an effort, for me! I’m so lucky to be your husband,” he said. 
You suppressed a smile. “That doesn’t make up for the fact that you humiliated me last night.” 
Doyoung sighed. “I know. That’s why I’m doing this.”
Your brows quirked up. “Doing what?” 
Doyoung grinned. He flung his head towards the sky and crossed himself dramatically. Then, he unbuttoned his long coat, and pulled it off his shoulders. 
When you saw what he was wearing underneath, you gasped. 
Doyoung was wearing – if you could call it wearing – your outfit from last night. The tight white shirt strained over his muscled torso, and the tartan skirt sat like a belt across his hips. His legs were very, very bare. He looked absurd. 
You slapped your hand across your mouth, trying not to laugh. 
A passer-by wolf whistled. Doyoung stuck his tongue out at them. 
You ran towards Doyoung and wrapped your arms around him, shielding his front with your body. A woman walking her dog actually tutted at you. A kid said, “Who’s the man in the skirt?” before her mum pulled her away. 
“Stop sticking your arms out!” you hissed. 
“Don’t put me in detention!” Doyoung yelled. 
“You are absolutely mad,” you gasped, covering his mouth with your hand. “You over-the-top, eccentric, amazing man.”
Doyoung smiled, freeing his mouth and pressing his lips to your neck. “Does this mean I’m forgiven?”
You smacked Doyoung’s butt, earning a yelp. 
“You Catholics,” you said, smirking. “Obsessed with forgiveness. Come back to bed and we’ll see.”
-
MAIN MASTERLIST
Let us know what you thought in the comments or on anon! 💋
317 notes · View notes
haespoir · 11 months
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suggestive texts w/ model!doyoung
req: by anon 💌
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582 notes · View notes
multifandomslxt · 2 months
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Quiet Rage (Teaser)
MDNI
MINORS GO AWAY
Pairing: bsf!Johnny x reader
Synopsis: You wanted to test a theory and ended up making Johnny "Quiet Rage" Suh pissed all the way off. Surely he wouldn't take it out on you though right? after all, you were his best friend.
WARNING: THIS IS SMUT...arguably one of my dirtiest yet. reader is a little shit and Johnny is the quiet guy in the friend group. Johnny in glasses. Dirty and I mean DIRTY talk. spit, sweat, mentions of bruising skin, drooling, overstimulation, exhibitionism via video call, just dirty stuff alright
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"Quit playing with me." He bites back, completely unamused by your attempt at a joke.
Your body stills as you stare wide-eyed at the man beside you. You didn't expect that from him. He wasn't the type to be so aggressive, especially with you.
"I didn't mean for that to happen, John." You said weakly. He had to understand, you were just trying to get his attention.
"But it did y/n and now I'm gonna have to show you what happens when you don't fucking listen" He rages quietly, eyes still on the road ahead.
It was always quiet with him.
little did you know.
To the untrained eye, he seemed cool and collected. But, you could tell he wasn't quite there. Maybe it was the way he squeezed the life out of the steering wheel or how he kept clenching and unclenching his jaw. Or, you know, the massive tent in his pants…
either way, you knew
somehow, you managed to piss off Johnny Suh.
"I suggest you start thinking of a way to apologize because you have no fucking idea what I have planned for you." He momentarily looks at you just long enough for you to see the dangerous glint in his eyes.
Quiet rage full fic
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hexonthepeach · 2 months
Text
perfume - k.dy
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pairing: f4!nct doyoung x fem!reader (past johnny x reader mentions)
genre: hana yori dango/boys over flowers/meteor garden/f4 thailand reverse harem au (mild allusions and characterization only)
warnings:
bully-to-friends-to-lovers, established relationship, polyamory, dom!doyoung, glucose father adjacent, scent kink, control over food consumption/bathing (for scent kink purposes only), gratuitous use of the l-word by anti-romantics, angst/feelings, flashbacks and history
🔞 edging, cockwarming, orgasm denial, oral (m/f receiving), passionate sex, rough sex, spanking, creampie, bukkake, consensual negotiated kink (degradation, somnophilia), anal play (f receiving)
wordcount: 20k
author's note: this is a doyoung-centered continuation of my ongoing F4 au. it can stand on it's own but i recommend reading Dive for more context. Doyoung's role in the F4 is Sojirou Nishikado/So Yijung/Ximen/Kavin (playboy control freak) so this fic incorporates elements of his secondary romance within the original/adaptations, now with y/n.
read on AO3
fic headers / dividers credit to @ saradika + please do not repost
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Freshman year, Kocher International. 
Head down in your books at lunch, trying so hard to escape scrutiny from above, you pretend to be no one. 
It shouldn't be hard to be nobody, otherwise ignored and immune to whatever social contract deliberates your life. In a better world you'd be invisible. It's a superpower you'd wish for much more over the usual playground answers of super speed or control of the weather. 
Let me be unobserved, you'd thought. Let me open a door and not worry about a bucket full of dirty mop water falling on my head or the inevitable posting of a grainy video of it, posted in a Telegram channel to fulfill some checklist made up by bored, rich monsters. 
Your four-generation-behind phone with its cracked screen proved useful in some regards; you never heard about these public pillories until some kind stranger sent you a screenshot of them, usually in the context of whatever plans they'd made to torture you again.
Every notification is already a pain, driving splintered glass into the pads of your fingers. Just now you're reading a text message from your father asking you to pick up more cheap instant noodles from the convenience store on your walk home to round out whatever scraps he's picked up from the local restaurant your mother bussed tables and cleaned dishes at when she needed extra money.
"Why is Saint Kim watching you?" your friend asks across the table. She's been looking up at the room this entire time, unable to give you even a moment of her attention or assistance to finish the English homework you'd been working on. You'd been rushing all day to finish it before afternoon class, after a late morning of delivery driving for your family's drycleaning business.
"Are you sure it's not the Devil?" you ask, parsing through the lines of a book you'd bought secondhand, trying to match verse for verse.
"No," she says, shaking her head when you finally look up. "Don't react. He's coming this way."
"Shit," you say under your breath, eyes flicking to your untouched lunch. "I need you to leave now. Take these trays and dump them and I'll meet you outside of 4th. If I make it."
You don't look up from your book as you mutter, but you follow her path and her hesitancy as she internally debates whether to heed your warning or watch from a safe distance.
Your handwriting becomes a scrawl of nonsense you have to cross out in sharp lines. You begin the verse again, holding your breath as you will your entire body and mind back to a manufactured calm. 
If you can't be invisible, you can at least play your role. You're copacetic by the time you see the tips of polished black wingtips beside you, before you hear the Saint clear his throat.
“Y/N.”
He drops a familiar, school-mandated clear cosmetics bag next to your ratty backpack. The already embarrassing stash of tampons and old chapstick has a new bounty including a "used" pregnancy test stick with a second line drawn in with pink gel pen jumbled into its contents.
"You left this . . ." he says, not finishing the sentence to indicate where he'd found it. You immediately hear a titter. Your flock of spectators is growing by the second and the useful idiot at its center seems wholly unconcerned.
"Thanks," you say, not bothering to look up or to even hide the bag. You keep writing, blindly, the English words just rounded shapes flowing from your shaking hand. 
Their kind fed off attention, your only defense is to starve them of it.
The Saint clears his throat, again. Apparently he’s not just unconcerned, he’s also unwilling to leave.
"Aren't you grateful Doie found it before someone else did?" You don’t have to look up to know it's Miranda who’s asked, glimpsing her manicure as she picks up your bag, green gems shining on perfectly-tipped nails. 
"Oh this must not be hers. I didn't think she could afford this."
You think she might be diving into the stash for one of the Lilies' pointed additions but no–you watch in horror as she plucks out the bottle of perfume you'd been carrying with you since your parents had gifted you a single, tiny box last Christmas. 
"Chanel?" she says, laughing. "No wonder you smell like my grandma."
"Probably a knock-off," another of the Lilies says. Ginger, by the sound of her grating voice. Her handwriting on the board in homeroom listing out your abortions is as familiar as the pink gel pen script on the extra large foil condom with xoxo slut written on it staring at you through the plastic.
"Definitely a knock-off. You have a nose, don't you, Doie?"
You look up, finally, at Saint Kim. He's alone for once–the other one, the Devil Kim that shadows him is still up on the second level, leaning on the railing over his shoulder. You watch the Saint’s small mouth turn into a moue of distaste, nose wrinkling at the proffered bottle.
"Authentic," he says, capping it before offering it back to you. Your field of vision is obstructed by that veined, pale hand–fingernails as perfectly groomed as the rich girls who surround him.
You reach up to take your most prized possession back only to find he doesn't let go, holding tight when you try to pluck it from his fingers.
"You should know . . . " he says, sniffing slightly.
You look up at him with alarm blazing in your eyes. Every word Kim Doyoung says to you writes your next damnation. You should ignore him, run, anything–but you can't look away once you've met his assessing gaze, his tall frame limned in the fluorescent cafeteria lights like he's carrying his own personal halo. 
Even seeing him at a distance every day can't depreciate how ethereally handsome he is. You know better than to swoon at that elegant face, night-black hair pushed away from his forehead. Beneath his family’s charities and his PR-scripted concern you know he’s just another ungodly creation birthed of nepotism and curated genes.
He leans in, carefully, musical voice a whisper. 
"You should know it doesn't suit you."
The laughter that follows is deafening.
No, you think. He's just as soulless as the rest of them.
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“What do you mean actually sleep?" you ask, coyly, unbuttoning your romper. "Like after we . . . ?"
"I've managed 6 hours of sleep in 36 hours, y/n–” Doyoung seems to hesitate, dark eyebrows raising, hand pushing his hair back from his pale forehead. He snaps his laptop closed, at last, shoving it to the farthest edge of the bedside table.
No–you think–not hesitation. 
Frustration.
You've seen this man before. 
All work and no play made Saint Kim into a Prince of Hell. He'd spent the first 8 hours of your date day half-present–the other in the 4 hours of sleep he's gotten since some crisis at his family’s headquarters in London that usurped your vacation. 
A whole 2 days in which he hasn't held you at all. His rules, his chance, but you can't help but wonder what has him so clenched that he's barely even touched you since your date began at 6 am Bangkok time.
You'd taken two extra strength melatonin and slept like the dead, anticipating his early-riser schedule. Only you and God had to know you'd fallen asleep next to your day tour fit ready to be fucked in it. 
You’d made yourself so pretty only to find him in the kitchen hunched over his phone, laptop softly pinging with notifications. Doyoung had still been dressed in the clothes you'd seen him in the night before, ending his conference call to laser in on you hovering in the kitchen.
"Are you upset?" Doyoung asked.
"No," you'd lied, pushing the piece of paper he'd left the staff on the counter, his English handwriting crisp and formal. "What’s this?" 
"We have a few dietary restrictions today," he’d said. 
"Are you saying I am what I eat?" You’d asked, taking a bite of a plump strawberry. "Is this some kind of prep?"
"It's for the date," he'd said, resigned. "Just be patient with me."
Then he'd smiled, disarming you with a casualness you hadn’t seen on him in a long time, rubbing his eyes blearily under his thick glasses. 
"Can we go back to sleep?"
And so you'd settled into his grasp on your made bed, scrolling Insta and waiting for the inevitable alarm–which turned out just to be Jungwoo delivering two iced Americanos in some gambit of checking your progress.
"Missed the floating market opening?" Jungwoo asked, eyebrows raised at the sight of Doyoung face first in a pillow.
You'd silently mouthed your thanks, leaving the drinks to sweat on the bedside table as you changed into your second outfit of the day, occasionally drifting in to check on your sleeping beauty.
It was a rare delight to have him so vulnerable beside you, blanket rucked up beneath his chin and his white teeth visible past the sweet curves of his mouth. Without consciousness your partner for the day is just Kim Doyoung, the gentler side of the same creature who you knew would often choose a couch to watch serial television with you over a day trip if you wanted it. 
But this was different.
Now instead of using his precious time to fulfill what you'd felt promised in his casual brushes against your back when you'd finally traveled out, or the way he'd stroked your leg at brunch under the table (every bite chosen by him, of course), you're being railroaded into lying still while he sleeps. 
Again.
You continue undressing, letting him drink in the sight of the lingerie set he’d left in your room. You knew it was custom made by the way it lifted each curve he’d already had access to, tailored for you as if every millimeter of your body was to account for.
Doyoung's cheeks are hollowed, lip chewed. He pulls his glasses down and regards you even more as you continue to undress yourself.
"You do know what the word 'nap' means, don't you?"
"I'm not the one who hasn't slept," you say. "At least let me get comfortable."
His stare pierces into you as you turn around, stripping for utility rather than give him a show he clearly hasn’t earned. You check yourself in the floor-length mirror beside the bathroom, viewing yourself through his eyes as you pluck the lace over your curves to sit just right. 
“Do you like it?” you ask.
You may as well be speaking to the floor when you turn around, finding him buried in the pillows only by the dark fall of his hair.
“You can’t be that tired,” you say. 
You're used to taking a late afternoon siesta in peak summer but you're far too excited to even consider sleep right now. For one, it's sweltering–windows open to allow the noises of hawkers and traffic not far off to drift in.
Second, you've never been more turned on in your life. 
You can still feel the tingling in your toes from when he’d slipped his hand up under the hem of your shorts, teasing at the velvety smooth skin on your inner thigh as you tried not to choke on your mimosa.
You make your way to the bed languidly, crawling up the thick white duvet with a teasing smile.
"Just stay on your side of the bed, please," Doyoung says.
"Oh," you say, collapsing on top of the covers beside him. "Well you're no fun." 
"And you're impatient and uncouth," he retorts in a way that makes you wonder if he really means it. 
"Will you at least hold onto me?"
"Too hot." He rolls on his back, flapping his half-buttoned shirt in the breeze from the fans. You sigh dramatically, collapsing into the pillows in the middle of the bed. 
"You should get naked, then.” You say. “Don't be modest on my account."
He opens one eye to glare at you, finding you relaxed and inviting beside him. His throat bobs, gaze flicking to the ceiling.
"That year of celibacy really took a toll on you, didn't it? Two hours. Indulge me."
"Please, sir," you whisper. "I've been such a good girl."
It had been a stipulation of the F4’s latest deal–24 hours for you to recover from your first night before the gauntlet began. Doyoung had been more than strict about the terms, leaving you your own set of instructions including–not surprisingly–not touching yourself.
Under normal circumstances you wouldn’t think about masturbation constantly, at all hours of the day. He may as well have told you to try not to think about a white bear for how powerful the intrusive thought had taken over since then.
"You'll get your reward. Later," he says. He's an impassable wall, stretched out beside you, so you content yourself with staring at his profile. Even under these oppressive circumstances you appreciate the light dusting of freckles on his cheek brought out by the sun, the dark lashes dusting his cheeks over the slight bluish marks of sleep deprivation.
"Yes, sir."
It only takes a few minutes for him to snap at you again.
"Stop that," 
"Stop what?" 
"Getting so handsy."
You hadn’t even realized your hand had drifted over the plane of his belly under his white shirt, too absorbed with watching the muscles in his cheek spasm as you inched nearer. 
"Can I help it when you're right there?" you ask. "I thought this was your–"
Doyoung rolls you before you can slither any closer, pressing your back into the sheets with his hands on your wrists, knees digging into your thighs. 
If the intention was to get you to stop being uncomfortably turned on it has the opposite effect: you let out a moan of pleasure, legs twisting together for friction. He slams them shut between his own, groin pressed into yours.
He's as hard as you hoped, and you lift up into him to let him know you know it.
"If you don't behave I'll have to cancel this," he warns directly in your ear, sounding as choked as you feel. "I thought you were already trained." 
"Trained to fight back," you correct, pressing against him with your own strength.
"That's not trained," he says, lifting up. "I'll blame your lack of experience and experienced partners. Nothing we can't work on. Until then you'll follow my rules or I pull you from the game. Understood?" 
You let a few beats pass, accepting there's no way out and you don't have anything to throw back at him.
"Yes, sir," you pout.
"Now that's a good girl," he says.
Just as quickly as you were taken down you're let go, inhaling deeply now that you're not being pressed into the soft bed. 
"You really don't want to play with me before you sleep?" you ask, brushing your lips against his chin as he crouches over you. You’d be a liar if you didn’t say you enjoyed the way his nostrils flare a bit, working his pink bottom lip between his teeth. Whatever arbitrary rules he’d set for your time together you can tell he’s at least regretting it right now, stiff length brushing against your bare leg as you lift your knee to test it. 
“Are you trying to make me punish you?” he asks, voice husky. 
"I thought you liked it when I was a brat," you say, cocking your head. 
Doyoung sighs, eyes half-lidded. "I do. But not when you're using it to avoid intimacy."
Your throat clenches, a hard knot forming in it you can't seem to swallow as your face gets even hotter.
“What are you talking about?” you ask. 
“I think you know what I mean,” he continues. “It’s not like we both don’t have a habit of using sex as a distraction from anything emotionally challenging.”
You gape up at him in disbelief. 
Of course you’d never been able to hide that aspect of your last relationship with him when he’d often been right outside the door. All of the F4 knew how many times your arguments with he-who-should-not-be-named-especially-not-while-in-bed-with-his-best-friend had ended in you shutting him up by any means necessary. Not that you didn’t enjoy it at the time–but rather you understood it wasn’t the most healthy template for a relationship. 
"I thought this wasn't going to be about feelings," you blurt out.
“Proving my point.”
Doyoung tsks, tapping your cheek with his fingers–nowhere near a slap but just as effective, soothing the spot with his thumb. Soon he’s brushing your tears away when they inevitably spring up and you have to turn to hide their seep into the mass of pillows.
"If I wanted therapy I wouldn't be here, Kim Doyoung," you say, trying to bury your face in the piles of soft down. 
“Shh, silly girl,” He gently pulls you out from hiding, soothing you with a warm kiss against your forehead when you stop struggling and let him hold you, releasing that surge of emotion and writing it off to hormones and the sting of rejection.
“You know I’m speaking to myself here, too,” he states softly. “Bear with me, I’m learning.” 
"Do you even really like me?" you ask, face pressed into his chest. 
It’s horrible to admit this specific insecurity but you can’t help it. Being abandoned multiple times in your life when you’d finally, finally let your walls down would damage anyone’s trust. You’d hoped this day with him would be easy and carefree and light, not dimmed by the shadows of your anti-romantic histories. 
"I adore you, actually." He settles partially on top of you, leg wrapped over yours as he props himself up on his elbow. "Which is why I want to start this right. You wanted the F4 boyfriend experience. This is mine."
"Last I checked you’ve never seriously dated anyone," you groan, sniffling. 
"Last I checked, neither have you." 
Well, that connects. You swallow your fears, relaxing into the cage of his embrace, retreating a little from the vulnerability of being exposed.
"What kind of girlfriend experience were you expecting, then?"
A lazy smile gusts across his features. You can't help but find it a bit sinister after being handled so indelicately. 
“I don’t always know what’s going on in that empty little head of yours." He accompanies his statement with a brush of his thumb across your flushed cheek, tracing your semi-parted lips in a way that sends sparks down to your core. 
"I’d like to stop guessing and actually get you to let me treat you the way you want to be treated. Have you ever asked yourself what you want?"
You panic a little, considering his words. Living with disappointment had made this question a hard one to even consider. 
"I just want a good time. Isn't that what you want, too?"
Doyoung seems to ignore your ask, drifting into a relaxed state against the pillows. His hand traces the hairline at your temple. "You know I worry about you. All the time, actually.” 
His voice is lower, a little wistful, and it’s doing just as much as the slight brushes of his fingertips to make you throb all over again. A lack of sleep must have made him delusional, you think. This is not the Kim Doyoung you know.
“You’re always thinking of how to take care of the people around you, I think you’ve forgotten how to relax and let other people take care of you.”
"Is that why you're always involving yourself in my business?" you ask, matching his tone in how breathless you are. You expect a quip, not the sincerity written on his face when he swoops in to press a gentle kiss against your lips, too fleeting to be anything but sweet and sincere. 
“What do you think I’ve been trying to do all this time? It certainly wasn’t just to get into your pants. I want you. All of you.” 
You're taken aback by his honesty. You'd always suspected his constant meddling in your affairs came from a place of interest but you'd never wanted to give him too much of a response–maybe a little afraid his fickle nature and fear of commitment would mean he’d give up on your friendship, too. 
Another thing you knew about Saint Kim: he had a tendency to run like a frightened rabbit at the first sign of emotional neediness in his partners. You'd never given him reason to believe you expected anything from him, but you'd also stopped fighting him on giving you what he desired to give.
It wasn’t just presents or expensive experiences, of course. He’d found out quickly those weren’t welcome without some cajoling. No–his art was in knowing what you needed even before you realized it, nudging it across your path. 
You’d figured out his deviousness after the umpteenth time someone was charitable at your little florist shop part time job, offering to fix your scooter in exchange for a nice arrangement for a proposal. As soon as you’d seen the fully restored bike outside and the customer didn’t return your texts you’d called Doyoung, completely unsurprised to find he was at the coffee shop next door, waiting to pick up his flowers.
“Stop being so nice to me,” you’d said. “It makes me uncomfortable.”
“What makes you think I’m giving you charity,” he’d responded, dropping a department store bag and your own custom coffee order on the counter. “You’ll wear this when I come to pick you up tonight at closing, including the jewelry and perfume. I need you to play your part again. The flowers are a consolation for the heart we’re breaking.”
He’d enlisted you as his defacto “new girlfriend” for the more difficult separations, and though you’d gotten your share of a glass of expensive wine thrown in your face more often than he ever experienced it (his type always went after the easier target) it wasn’t like he didn’t have a replacement dress ready and a nice dinner waiting after you’d cleaned off the Chateau Lafitte Rothschild. 
You have to face the fact that no matter how many times he’d treated you like his girlfriend, you’d never actually expected him to want you to be one. 
“I’ve waited a very long time for this, Y/N. Which is why I want our first time together–alone," he adds quickly. "–To be special."
It's difficult to believe him but you're spellbound all the same, watching pink dust his cheeks and his ears turn a shade darker as he most likely realizes how ridiculous it is considering him fucking you senseless the other night with the help of two other men. 
But you can empathize with his anxiety. Yesterday's Thai massage he'd arranged had helped you work out the flight or fight of anticipating being alone with him. It’s back now, but different. The way he's looking at you makes you feel infinitely naked, infinitely unlocked.
"What do you mean special?" you ask, wary, hoping to see some glimmer of uncertainty or falsehood in his gaze. You want to believe it's a lie or just some artful prank, trying to ignore your heart flip-flopping in your chest. 
It’s a mistake to let him see you squirm considering it’s Doyoung’s drug of choice–his lips twist into another menacing grin as he plays with the charm on your necklace. Another of his little gifts.
"Do you think you can handle it?" Doyoung asks, dripping self-satisfaction. “Or are you going to chicken out on me?”
You turn over so he can't see your expression, realizing he’s throwing your own words from the night before right back at you.
"I haven’t decided if I want to date you, yet,” you say. 
"Maybe not," he says. "But you'll have to pardon me for wanting to show you this good time you supposedly want while also treating you decently. Unless we're no longer friends?"
"We are," you say, biting your lip, "even if you enjoy torturing me."
"Torture?" He laughs, breathy. 
"Metaphorically speaking."
"You have no idea, do you?" You can feel the edge of his glasses as he bites the place where your clavicle connects to your shoulder, his hand snaking around your bare middle.
"You could show me," you invite, mid-gasp, as your body responds to his long-awaited touch. His fingers are almost cool in contrast to the heat in the room, tracing circles in your skin that have you squirming. 
"Is that a challenge?" he asks.
Why not?
"We don't have to have sex," you offer. "Maybe you could just–"
"Shh," he says, fingers skimming lower. "My terms. Are you going to stay quiet for me?"
You nod into the comforter, breath hitching as he touches you through the thin layer of your underwear, veined hand flexing as he molds the damp fabric to your body. It's such a delicate pressure but he's already memorized your shape, index finger sinking into your folds, gently rubbing a ring around your throbbing clit.
You're sticky and swelling with each pass, entranced by how good he is at teasing you, cherishing the way he sucks in his breath when he pushes into the indent of your hole.
“Doie,” you whine, leaning back into him, trying to get him to kiss you as he laughs into your hair. 
“Quiet,” he reminds you, kissing your cheek and teasing the seat of your underwear where they're soaked the most. "You want to take these off?" 
You shake your head, sensing it would be too easy of you to give in.
"That wasn't a question," he says, tugging down the band, leaving them trapped tight around your thighs. "I don't want you to wear them until I tell you that you can." 
You feel your core clench at the way his voice cracks, his fingers sliding back up to slowly and delicately draw a thread of moisture from your bared slit. You whine a little when he stops touching you, bringing his fingertip to your lips.
"Taste it." 
You let your mouth fall open, let him run it over your tongue, beginning from the middle and swirling over it. 
"Describe it," he murmurs. "If I like your answer, maybe I'll indulge you more." 
"Salt," you say, immediately. 
He tugs your hair, making you meet his eyes. 
"Have I taught you anything? I want specific notes. Flavors." 
You're transported back to the time he'd taken you to your first (and last) wine tasting. Spitting into a bucket and being lectured about body and tannins and soil conditions was the last thing you'd wanted to do after an hours-long trip to a vineyard but you'd indulged him, allowed one glass of what he considered the only drinkable wine on the premises. 
An unrefined palette, he'd called you. 
"Fruity and floral," you make up. "A nice lingering finish. Want a taste?" 
He looks down at you behind his glasses, equal parts amused and unimpressed. "Did you use the soap I asked you to?" 
Your brain glitches at that. Had you? You'd been in such a rush to go out–
You gasp when he palms your breast, squeezing the meat of it through the breathable fabric of your matching bra.
"I'll take that as a no," he says. "I guess you're not ready." 
He rolls off of you, leaving you in a lurch as you realize your legs are locked together by your underwear. You move to remove them, taking off your bra as well to avoid the awkwardness of being partially dressed.
By the time you're done you realize he's on his back, the hand that had been stroking you buried in his loose khakis. 
"What are you doing?" you ask, more than a little pissed off at the sight of him masturbating as if you aren't ready and willing to assist beside him. 
"Getting ready for our date. You can watch. No touching." He cracks an eye to look at you before closing it again. "Either of us."
"Are you edging me, Kim Doyoung?" Your menacing tone is entirely natural.
He hums a bit, working himself at a more punishing pace, knuckles peeking out from under his boxer briefs with each full pass over his length.
"Can't even look at me? Afraid you'll lose control?" You sidle down on the bed, beside his tensed thigh. You can smell a bit of the ozone on him from a morning in the sun, your knees knocking into his calves when you move over him.
"I don't trust you," he says, voice deeper than you've ever heard it.
"Is it touching if you finish on my face?" you ask when he finally blinks up at your presence, hovering over him with your breasts dangerously close to his clothed thighs.
"Absolutely not."
"Not touching–"
"Just. Watch," he orders.
He pulls himself free from his pants, surprising you with how dark and weeping his tip is as his thumb encircles it. Pools of white precum spatter on his lean, pale belly, your head dipping dangerously close–
"I said watch." He grabs at your hair, denied when you bend up again, showing him your dirty tongue.
He groans, fingers clenching air. "You were put on this earth to test me, weren't you?"
Still, he doesn't break his attention on the way you roll the drops you'd licked from his clean skin in your mouth, swallowing once you've fully enjoyed the taste.
"A little sweet you say," teasing him. "Drinking pineapple juice?"
"Brat," Doyoung says, but he's almost gone–eyes dark with desire, gently gripping your skull as you continue to ease in.
You're a master at following his lead, blowing a breath over the spot you'd licked, and then his length until his movements slow, cherishing the way you hold your mouth over his cock.
"If you can't give me what I want, then at least give me a taste," you say, sticking out your tongue in offering. You love the way he responds to the sight, needy and losing it when you hold eye contact, drilling into him.
"No," he echoes, weakly. He's too smart to push into your open mouth, instead driving his hips up to fuck his fist as you watch his glasses slide down his nose, eyes clenching shut. 
"You're no fun," you say. "Just a little swallow can't hurt?"
"No. Don't want to ruin it," he says cryptically, making a choked noise as you brush his fingers with your nose and he has to pull you away.
"I promise you it . . . It will be worth it," he manages. His jaw clenches as his movements relax, finally in control of you both.
"It better be," you say. 
You lower your lashes as your eyes flick between his cock and his face, stretching out your tongue to the point that drool begins to drip down your chin, splashing on his whitened knuckles and the tight stretch of his balls peeking out from his underwear. He bites his lip, breath holding as he starts to spiral.
The first thick rope of white rockets up his half-bared chest. Soon he's spurting even more, cum reaching his rucked up shirt, a little getting on his glasses. 
He's so out of it he doesn't fight as you wrest out of his limp hold. You clean up the sticky mess on his skin with your tongue, his abdominal muscles twitching under the light flicks and drags. 
"Want to give me some notes?" you ask, straddling him without resting any weight down, taking off his glasses. This time when you move to kiss him he rises weakly to meet you, lips parting to accept what you haven't swallowed. 
In truth, he tastes wonderful. Coffee, a little menthol from toothpaste and a hint of the watermelon you'd shared earlier mix beneath the coat of his spend.
He licks into your mouth until you moan, your body throbbing with unfulfilled pleasure. You follow him as he sinks back into the pillows, enjoying having him at your disposal, your core leaving wet trails on his thigh when you brush against the fabric.
"I'm going to wait until you're asleep and use you if you don't help me get off," you threaten, pressing soft kisses to his slack face. It’s no use. Doyoung has passed out again, lower teeth visible as he snores softly, forehead sheened with drying sweat.
Fuck it, you think. 
You ooze off of him to take your second cold shower of the day, and maybe get acquainted with one of the fancy showerheads in his massive walk-in while you use his special soap. 
It's not–technically–touching yourself.
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Your mystery destination isn't an unknown–it's in every tourist booklet and blog you'd skimmed before your trip, thinking you'd be on your own to find a good spot to traverse to. But it still takes your breath away the moment the car door opens in the sprawl of motorbikes and delivery trucks and Doyoung takes your hand to pull you into Paradise.
Pak Khlong Talat is a bustle of energy well after dark, the time you know its treasures are delivered fresh and unbloomed, wrapped in newspaper and steeped in crushed ice. For as far as you can see the market sprawls along Chak Phet road, but even more overwhelming than the sights and sounds is the scent. 
Jasmine, roses, lavender. Thousands upon thousands of blooms strung up and tended to by night owl vendors, delicate arrangements hand-sewed by artisans streetside into garlands so well-crafted Doyoung has to tug you to keep you moving, onwards to some other unspoken destination. 
"I was worried you might hate flowers after working with them for so long. I take it you like it?" he asks, indulging you when you ask if you can take his picture at a particularly lovely hang of garlands, the purple-blue light perfect for the film you'd loaded into your father's old camera. Photography had never been your craft, but after your dad had passed you'd made an effort to capture more of your memories, cherishing what you'd taken for granted before.
“It’s perfect,” you say, admiring him through the viewfinder. "But can you look like you're having fun?" 
Your model is stiff, mouth a moue as he checks the street for other observers or a possible collision with a laden handcart. 
"Fun?" Doyoung asks, and you snap his picture on the offbeat, enjoying his look of surprise. 
“Like you've taken your date to one of the most romantic places on earth, after buttering her up with a night cruise of Chao Praya and finally letting her eat real food." 
He sniffs at a fall of marigolds, a smug look on his face that you commit to film, right before he sneezes. 
"For the record, we're eating after this. Som tam hardly counts as a meal, I just didn’t want that drink going to your head." 
You're shepherded through the vast warehouse of the main market, to an adjacent street, and into a non-descript building painted in a funereal white.
"Are we even allowed to be here?" you ask, once the key code is entered and you enter the strange business. 
"I called in a favor," he says, taking your hand, leading you up a metal staircase past a simple storefront of dried blooms and shelves laden with boxes and bottles alike.
An apothecary? An alchemist's shop? The purpose of the space eludes you.
"An atelier," Doyoung explains. "One of the most sought out in the world."
There's the distant hum of the city outside and a central air you're unused to in this climate but the upstairs is quiet–by all accounts either an office or a laboratory, or a mixture of both. The central working area is a chaotic but organized space filled with tables of glassware and dried floral arrangements contrasting potted orchids, small beakers of coffee beans littered amidst rows of labeled brown bottles.
"So this is how they make perfume," you say, inspecting a stoppered bottle labeled "Gerianol 10%".
"Not just any perfume. The best. Here." Doyoung leads you to a much less cluttered workstation, the desk arranged with the lights still on, a note detailing some instruction you can barely read before he slips it into the pocket of his slim-tailored pants. Beneath it is a notebook, scrawled with a perfect cursive English you recognize from the cards he’d included in boxes or bags whenever he’d bothered to claim their contents. 
"Sit," he instructs. You think he means the comfortable chair but before you can sit down he presses you to the desk, caging you in. 
"Sit," he repeats, hands on your hips through your slinky skirt, lifting you to the bench. You scoot back, carefully, the white blooms of some exotic flower brushing against your cheek until he can move the vase a careful distance. 
"Do you understand what we’re doing here?"
You can't possibly know what he means, eye level with the graceful column of his neck and his exposed collarbone beneath his translucent button-down, drowning in the melange of scents but most especially his clean, neutral cologne. 
"No," you say, honestly, heart beating fast. 
He picks up a corked flask from some kind of metal scale, dipping a thin thread of paper into it to waft it a fair distance from your nose.
"Before we came here--before you even agreed to this trip–I sent instructions to my friend for a specialty blend of their creation. It took quite a bit of back-and-forth–I even visited here last month to take a private class and make sure we prepared the base and middle to your standards."
"For me?" 
You feel dizzy, reaching out to take the sample and smell it again, his hand capturing your own before you can bring it too close to your nose. He wafts it for you, expectant as you absorb the details.
Indeed, it smells divine–exactly the kind of warm, bright notes that make your heart feel at ease. There’s something floral and citrus worked in, not too heavy, the finish leaving you with an impression of a lazy summer afternoon. 
“It’s beautiful,” you say. “Did you make this to match what you knew I liked?”
"Yes.” Doyoung exhales, looking almost sheepish. "I had some references. That cheap shampoo you never stop buying, the Lush exfoliator with the orange blossom, even–" he shudders a bit– "that awful Chanel you doused yourself in, in high-school."
"Coco Mademoiselle," you say. "It's been years since I–"
"It didn't suit you," he says, standing up to sample another bottle from the neat row. 
Something dawns on you, a distant memory locking into place.
"It was you," you gasp in realization. "You're the one who got rid of it. I should have known when you tried to give me that bottle of Jo Malone–"
“It had already turned. You need to store your scents away from direct light.”
“It was a keepsake!” There were very few possessions from your youth that you’d been able to hold onto–not only because your parents had been barely able to afford your school uniforms, much less gifts. What little you’d had was lost when your house was destroyed by the men your father owed money to, this small thing neglected in the destruction.
“It didn't suit you because it wasn't made for you," he continues. "You wore it because you thought it would make you fit in, when you should have made what you wore wear you–"
"Please, stop."
You have to bite your lip to the point of pain, remembering how excited you'd been to unwrap that tiny bit of luxury your parents had saved up to buy you, your mother sure the brand name would save you from another day of humiliation. You didn’t have the heart to tell them that the cutout ad from the magazine on your wall was for the model, not the actual perfume, but you felt loved by the gesture all the same.
Hundreds of thousands of won an ounce for it to only turn on your skin, well before afternoons spent on the basketball court under the thankless sun. That memento had aged from pink to a sickly rose unused on your cosmetic shelf, a totem from a time when you imagined yourself belonging. Before it had disappeared, like so many other things.
You can't remember the last time you'd worn anything, had never even gone near that section of a department store after the humiliation of being made fun of for smelling cheap.
“My dad skipped lunches and my mom worked double shifts to get that for Christmas my first year in Kocher,” you say. “Mira was the brand ambassador for that campaign, you know.”
Mira had been your idol even before you won the scholarship she’d established to attend Kocher. Perfect, beautiful, but most of all the first girl in their sphere to show you genuine kindness.
"It must be so easy for you," you say, wiping your face. You rarely cried these days but that memory was particularly painful, a reminder of how often you’d assumed Doyoung found you just as offensive. Not just your scent, you thought, but you.
Something to be tolerated. Below his regard. 
"Whatever you want, you can have. Whatever you don't like, you can get rid of. I'm sorry, I don't live in your world. I can’t just throw something away when it’s not useful."
"No," he says, quietly, abandoning his explanation. "That was thoughtless of me. I can replace it–"
“Can you?” You glare up at him. “Is this what you really want? To dress me up like your perfect doll and feed me from your hand so I’m more able to suit you?
Doyoung looks like he's going to be ill, every design in his head unraveling before your eyes. You’d feel sorry for him if you didn't know this was a lesson worth imparting.
"Don't ever offer to replace what you don’t know the true value of," you say, voice trembling.
There's a weighted silence as he considers his next words. You still haven't slipped away from him, choosing to hold your ground. How many times had you been forced to be the antagonist in some fruitless class warfare, unresolved? But then you also had a habit of finding battles in peacetime. 
You pluck the newest scent strip from his frozen hand and waft it between you, at the designated distance.
“Thank god this smells nothing like it,” you murmur. You offer him a wry smile, anger fading. “I couldn’t stand it.”
You feel Doyoung’s relief as he collapses against you, forehead against your hair as his arms wrap tight around your middle. You relax after a bit, cheek pressed to his collarbone as you breathe in his unique scent–a little like fresh laundry left out in the sun.
“I’m sorry,” he says. “All these promises and plans and stupid details and at the end of the day I really . . . Don't know what I'm doing."
"I really don’t know what you’re doing, either," you say. "But I like that you try.”
"You do?" The hope in his voice makes your iciness melt a bit. You let your hands twine around his neck, feeling the tension in his shoulders ease with the gesture.
“I know it’s not easy for me to admit but I do appreciate everything you do for me, Doie,” you say. 
He doesn’t respond in words but you savor the shift in his demeanor, like a weight has been lifted from him. You think even he didn’t know it was there. You ignore the glassiness in his eyes when he pulls back, choosing to look at his notes instead.
“Are these all the ingredients?” you ask, working out a few of the more familiar words. “What’s op–?”
“First things first,” he says, rolling up his sleeves.  "Did you touch yourself?" 
"No," you say, surprised by the shift. "I followed your instructions. No products with scents. No underwear."
You spread your thighs to make your point. His hands hike your skirt up, over the breadth of skin to your hips and then to the curl of your belly, his breath hitching as he finds you already glossy.
It had been a bit of a gambit considering your riverside excursion but he'd allowed you a lemongrass-based repellent–the scent of which is still clinging to your bare skin as he kneels down to press a kiss to where his fingers had traced earlier.
You jerk a bit, conscientious of the workspace as he spreads you, just that light touch making your nipples harden beneath your thin shirt and bra.  
“Are we allowed to–”
“Shh. Relax and try not to spill anything,” he interrupts, breath cooling your wetness. “I just need some inspiration.”
“What?” 
"You’re so good already," he says into your sex, spreading you so he can lightly tongue at your skin. “Perfect little flower just for me.”
After waiting so long, you're torn between begging and shoving his teasing licks away, hand threading through his raven hair as the notebook slips from your hand.
"Kim Doyoung–” you gasp as he spears his tongue through your upper folds, nose nudging the sensitive bud. “–if this is another round of teasing I will murd–”  
You yelp as he hunches down to wrap your legs around his shoulders, hands re-occupied by exposing you as you try to stay upright. 
“Don’t worry. You can come like this. I want to know if you taste different after.”
You don't know what he means until his mouth closes over your clit, sucking just right. You jolt, pinched on the meat of your thigh until you can relax again, making little mewls as he rolls his thumbs alongside the point of contact.
“I want you inside of me,” you beg, feeling that fluttering sensation that heralds a build-up. “I wanted to come with you inside me.” 
“Soon. Just need to be good while I sample you.” 
“Sample?” Your hand sinks into his hair in panic, tugging, but Doyoung is too lost alternating between suckling at your sex and palpating you with a circling thumb, his beautiful hands gripping your thighs to keep you spread.
“Drip for me, first.” 
“I don't think I can–”
“You giving up already?” Doyoung scoffs, smirking up at you with reddened lips, tongue-tip darting against your clit. Every brush of soft muscle makes you spasm a bit, belly tightening unfulfilled.
You shake your head, panting. “I just . . . Doie I want you inside me.” 
“You can relax and take it,” he says, tongue wrapping around your labia, sucking slightly. Your head is buzzing, every stray thought removed by his exploration of you.
“Relax. If you don't I'll just have to try until you're begging for me to stop.” 
“No, please, Doie. I'll be good,” you plead. “Just . . . need something inside. Hurts so bad being empty.”
“Hand me a pipette.”
“What?”
“The one that looks like an eyedropper,” he says, hand open to accept like he’s performing surgery. You fight to find the right glassware with his mouth still on you, efforts more focused and intense as your legs tense with each hit. You find the rubber-stoppered glass cylinder, stomach dropping. 
“Is this safe?” You ask, gripping his mussed hair tighter when he pulls away for a moment.
“If you hold still, yes,” he taunts. You seize when you first feel the tip slip inside you. The glass is cool but warms to your body heat quickly, too slim to feel anything.
“Good girl,” he says. “You’re even pushing this out, you must be so tight.”
“I am. Too tight,” you groan. “Please don’t tease me anymore.”
He ignores you, focusing on his work, pulling the instrument free when he’s satisfied.
“Not bad,” he says, dropping it on the desk beside you before he’s back on his knees with his nose buried in your cunt. “Bet you can do better than that.”
“No, please, I need you–”
“Then drip for me,” he laughs into your leg, tracing the wetness down the crease in your thigh. You tense your hold on the desk’s edge when you feel his tongue prod at your entrance, muscle breaching your hole to lick into you. He makes a satisfied noise in the back of his throat that has you plummeting just as he resumes stroking your clit through the slippery coat of your arousal. 
Finally, you think, feeling the advent of tears for how wound tight you are, how desperate you are to feel him give you just one more point of contact with the ache inside.
“Oh god, don’t stop, please don’t stop,” you repeat, the noises obscene as he drinks you in, other hand on your hip to hold you against his face. It’s not even the stimulation that makes you begin to come but the audible groan he releases as he feels you quake against his mouth, heels snagging on his shirt when the first wave breaks and those little tics inside you turn into powerful contractions around his tongue-tip taking everything you can give him. 
He keeps licking you even when you’re begging for him to stop, nose tracing down to catch a stray drop from the back of your knee with a playful dart of his tongue. 
“Was it worth it?” you ask, folding over him as he wipes his mouth clean in your drenched skirt. You know it’s just the start but you already feel wrung out and feather-light, wicking away the sweat that’s beaded on your own face despite the cool, dry air of the room. 
“Hmm?” he hums a bit, disentangling to stand up and hold your face in his hands. His pupils are blown, sweat beading on his temples, but he looks as satisfied as you hoped he would be, your arousal drying on his slender features.
“All the prep,” you say. “Isn’t that why–do I taste as good as you expected after all that?”
Doyoung looks down on you, amused. Already you feel like you’re heating up again, with how his dark eyes flit to your mouth and back up again. 
“You think I prefer you prepped?” he asks, angling his head down besides yours to whisper in your ear. “The next time I eat that perfect little pussy of yours I want it to be filthy.” 
He traces the lobe with his teeth for good measure, pulling another moan out of you. “I’ll even make sure to wait until the other two have a go at you, first.”
You feel your heartbeat stutter as he presses his lips to your pulse point, tongue darting past his lips to dab at the sweat there.
“No, precious, I wanted to make sure the perfume we make tonight matches all of you.” Doyoung’s nose brushes your ear as he breathes in your scent. “Every time I wear it I’m going to remember the way you sounded when you first came for me and me only.”
The promise of it has you feeling a different kind of heat, dizzying for how much you want it to last past this night. 
“Fuck,” you whisper explosively, eyes clenched shut to stay fixed upright, fisting the thin material of his collar as he pulls you from the countertop and against the hard planes of his body. “I need you. Now. Please.”
“I like hearing you say that,” he chuckles a bit. “But I’m going to make you earn it. You can wait a little longer. You made me wait years, after all.”
You let him guide you into his lap, in the chair, pushed into the desk as he opens the notebook to another page. And another, until you take over and explore it for yourself. In the dim golden light from the street outside you catch glimpses of colors and drawings, notes written of impressions and memories you’d all but forgotten in your haze of grief these past few years. 
There’s even photographs taped to some of the pages–ones you know well by the fact that they’d been taken on your camera. Doyoung didn’t have Jaehyun’s artistic training but he did have an eye for capturing candid moments.
November, your first year of college. You’re standing in the first snow of the season, catching flakes on your tongue. You can still feel the burn of them, hear the murmur of the city dulled in a fresh blanket of white and taste the roasted yam you’d eaten, tossing it in your mittened hands until it was cool enough to peel. 
Doyoung’s shoulder is off-kilter beside yours, unable to capture himself in the frame for all his long reach. The peek of the striped scarf you’d knitted for him in gray and blue is all that’s visible of him under his peacoat, the mismatched weave of it captured even in this poor exposure.
“Base note: cedarwood,” you read, carefully, eyes hazing a bit with emotion. Evergreen.
“I still have it, you know,” he murmurs against your temple. “I only stopped wearing it because it started unraveling.”
“I’d make you another but I quit knitting after making three scarves,” you say, wryly. “Well two and a half, actually, I ran out of yarn on Jungwoo’s and made him a hat instead.”
“I thought you were just trying to get him to hide that ridiculous military haircut,” Doyoung muses. “Keep going or we’ll be here all night.”
“Now you’re impatient?” you ask, cementing your flirtation by shifting in his lap. You can’t ignore the feeling of his erection folded against the curve of your ass, or the way he grunts when you find a better seat with it nestled between your thighs.
“Sometimes I forget you were put on this planet to vex me,” he says. You’re lifted up by the waist, a hand on your lower back the moment you’ve found the desk for support, face above the book. 
“Why don’t you try reading until I’m satisfied you know exactly what you’re getting?”
You don’t fight him, elbows bent as he rucks up your skirt. You feel your face grow warm with blood as you find yourself exposed to him again, locked in by his legs and his groping touch reaching up beneath your shirt. 
"Base notes: amber and–" you have to fight to keep your voice steady as he swats your exposed curves, hard enough to sting. 
"Ambergris,” he corrects, voice fried with delight.
“Ambergris,” you repeat. “And white musk."
"Good. And?"
"Bisabol–" you begin, corrected with another slap on your ass that hits, hard, glass jingling on the table.
"Did you jump ahead?" He asks, knowing full well your eyes are swimming with tears. 
"No sir," you say. “I didn’t think that was a real word.”
"Opoponax." He says, reaching over you to grab a bottle, dropping a thick oil on you and rubbing it into your bruising skin. "Also known as sweet myrrh. Go ahead. Keep reading."
"Source: distilled from resin from ancient groves in Somalia, bought in Mogadishu from a local orchard, all profits to fund schools and clinics for women displaced by civil war." 
"Do you believe this to be a charitable effort?" He asks, hand spreading over your buttocks. You think he might be referring more to your arrangement than whatever is written on the page.
"No," you say. Your history and political know-how might be lacking but you've seen the wrong side of kindness. "It sounds like what people write to make themselves feel better about exploitation."
"Clever girl," he answers. You feel his nose brush against your skin, testing the mingling of scent with it. "Keep going."
You turn the page, swallowing back your protests. This spread is rich with text and color, a veritable garden bursting from the page. You fix on the first entry in the upper corner, bracing yourself for another faux pas.
"Heart notes: Turkish rose," you say. "What is this, poetry?"
"Aren’t you familiar with it?"
You shake your head, lips pursed in delight at the scrawl of English. “No.”
You let out a gasp as he bites the flesh nearer your back, the sting of it surely leaving a mark by the way the pain lingers.  
"Read it," he says, dipping over you for another bottle. “You’ll remember.”
"I know a bank where the wild thyme blows, where oxlips and the nodding violet grows," you dictate, stumbling over every word and yet never punished for it. Instead Doyoung lets a steady drip of the bottle fall down the back of your leg to your knee, his fingers bringing up the rest to mix what he's already poured on you.
"Quite over-canopied with luscious woodbine, with sweet musk-roses and with eglantine." 
You end your recitation in a whisper, leather binding and paper gripped in your fingers as he massages the oil gently into your tingling skin, careful to avoid where your legs are locked together in arousal. You're heady with scent and sensation, awaiting some reminder that this isn't just a strange dream you’ve wandered into.
"There sleeps Titania sometime of the night, lulled in these flowers with dances and delight," he finishes for you as he paints the rest up your spine beneath your shirt. You let him ministrate on your body as the words settle, as time recedes and you face a version of your youth you’re not sure isn’t just fiction. 
That book beside you, the first time he’d spoken to, long forgotten.
“Midsummer’s Night Dream,” you say, turning to face him again, settling between his thighs as he fails to meet your gaze. You lift his face with your fingers, cheeks indented by your gentle hold. “You remembered that, too?”
“It was the first time you ever looked at me,” he says. “And it felt like you saw right through me.”
No, you’re not dreaming. You’re the architect of this moment just as much as he’ll claim to be a cursory observer if confronted on it. 
You take in his mismatched eyes–one folding a little more than the other when he smiles at you ruefully. Those freckles you’d never really spent time examining, a happy accident of the time he’d spent with you in the sun. His fingers catching yours for a moment when you weren’t paying attention.
But most of all, the haunted cast where he’d lost sleep managing someone else’s problems. When he’d still been worrying about yours.
“You’re always thinking of how to take care of the people around you, I think you’ve forgotten how to relax and let other people take care of you.”
“No,” you say, shaking your head. “I don’t think I ever really saw you until now.”
“What didn’t you see?” he asks, expectantly.
Six years of his careful distance from you, that coldness and disinterest just another mask for someone who was as raw and vulnerable and real as you if you managed to pry open their shell. His tendency towards control, towards the knife’s slice of cutting you so cleanly from his life no one would know your name unless he spoke it aloud.
There wasn’t another human being in their right mind who’d last that test, your only grace being that he’d thought you were untouchable. His best friend’s girlfriend, of course. But beyond that, one of his best friends. 
No, one of his only friends.
“What didn’t you see?”
It wouldn’t require money or taste or a family name to bring Saint Kim down to earth. Just time and small acts of resistance, like the beautiful shell remnants you’d spilled into his hands on that last trip to Maui together, when it had still been the five of you. Each ground down to a small disc with a perfect spiral at its center, a reminder of the beauty remaining in broken things.
You place the notebook in his hands, curling your fingers around his. The pages it’s opened to are sparsely constructed, besides the photographs nestled between. Only you two know what’s there, buried in black sands and blue waters. You can see his handwriting falter where he’s written the notes for this moment in your shared history, sketches of those shells, and flowers.
A single photograph of you watching the others playing in the surf, his shadow cutting across the stretch of your legs.
Top notes: Jasmine for sensuality. 
Orange Blossom for innocence. 
Plumeria, for admiration. a new beginning . . .
You recognize the creamy yellow-white flower he’d tucked behind your left ear when you’d fallen asleep beside him. A non-native plant to the island, you’d learned, worn to indicate one was taken. A weed, like you, now prized as a treasure.
“What didn’t you see?”
You pull back to look at him, giving him yourself without reservation. 
“That I think you love me . . .” you say. “. . . Like I think I love you, too.” 
He looks up at you, astounded, the chair beneath him creaking as he collapses. 
For once you regret being beside him when you’d heard the same words spoken to him by other people, pulled into their lives without you ever remembering their names. The difference between you, you once believed, was that they didn’t mean it. 
Now, you understand, they just never knew the true cost of losing him. 
You watch him collect himself, running a hand back through his hair and curling into his seat, memories forgotten in his lap, bedamned. You’re sure the engines of Hell are running hot for the way he can’t even look at you right now. 
He needs a way out, you think. You’d rather be drowned in other women’s wine poured over your head than be on the receiving end of his disregard again, the script already constructed in your mind before you’d found you had the nerve to sleep with him.
"You can be honest with me,” you say. “Tell me it's been fun but you're not interested in a relationship.”
“What?” Doyoung is just as confused as when you’d told him you loved him, as honest as you’ve been in both sentiments. 
“Your family will never approve of me. I’m just another fling you happened to take a more lasting interest in. It’s better this way. Cut me off, forget about me and move on.”
It's his turn to balk. You expect his pre-programmed response. Saint Kim's gospel for turning down the interested but uninteresting party: deflect, dissuade, detach. 
“No,” he says, face draining of color.
“It’s okay,” you say. “I can handle it. Really. We can still be friends.” 
“No,” he repeats, more forcefully.
“What do you mean, no?” you ask. “Isn’t that how this always ends?”
“You stupid girl,” he says, grabbing your face in his hands so you can’t escape, making you look into his warm gaze. 
"Don’t you get it? This was always about feelings.”
When his lips crush against yours you don't have to speak to respond, catching his head so you’re not suffocated by the raw emotion you can feel in every movement. You return each kiss until the breath is out of your lungs, until you're drowning in his scent as he forces you back onto the desk.
You’re impatient to feel him, everywhere, aware you’re ripping buttons as you open his shirt to gain access to his smooth chest, trailing kisses as far down as you can go, still unable to escape his tongue sliding over yours.  
“I wasn’t going to do this here, like this, but fuck it,” he says once he’s free, fumbling with his belt as he holds you to pepper your face and neck in a steady reminder of his affection. “I need you.”
“I need you, too,” you echo wholeheartedly, helping free him out of his clothing, pulling his length to where you’re still slick with oils and cum and ready for him. God, you think you’ve never been more ready to break around him, to show him what he’s brought out of you with this game.
“Please don’t make me wait anymore,” you whisper. 
You watch his face, breath held and heart stuttering as he sinks into you slowly, both of you gasping at the way your heat resists each measure of his continuous thrust. It feels like he’s barely in you when he stops, making you moan in dismay.
“Doie, please,” you say, trying and failing to wrap your legs around his slender hips to capture him deeper. You’re half out of your mind with that burning weight inside you remaining still.
“Say it,” he says, taking off your shirt to have access to your skin. He pulls down your bra, nipples tugged between his fingers as he assaults your neck with his tongue and teeth.
“It’s special,” you choke out. “Thank you, please–”
“Say it,” he corrects, twitching inside you but not moving an inch more. He curls down to nip at your breast above the lace, sucking a mark into the softest part. “Without the ‘I think’.” 
“No,” you resist, realizing what he’s asking too late. Your nails sink into his half-bared shoulder, head rolling against his. “You don’t get to torture me for that.”
“Don’t chicken out on me now.” Doyoung laughs against your cheek, hand splaying around your hip to still your squirming. “I can do this as long as it takes.”
He thrusts, just a little more, making you cry out in desperation as the contents of the desk tinkle behind you. 
“Fuck,” you breathe. “You think I love you?”
“So, so close.” He pulls out, rocking into you again to feel the seize of your entire body when you anticipate just how far he’ll go before denying you. A little more, at least, and you can feel how much it’s taking for him, see the strain in his body as he holds back.
“You love me,” you tease, this time not a question, no you think. “Saint Kim loves me.”
He sheathes himself in you fully, gripping your nape to kiss you as you clench involuntarily around him, protests in the back of your throat muffled by his tongue sliding across yours. He tugs at your bottom lip when he breaks free, fully smiling now like he isn’t buried completely in your cunt just warming himself instead of chasing his own bliss.
“What did you call me?” he asks, leaning over you to retrieve something. 
You take advantage of his distraction to snake a hand between you, slipping beneath your skirt before it’s grabbed, tight, and brought up to his lips. 
“Don’t cheat,” he says, wrapping your fingers around the cap of a bottle. 
“You never heard anyone call you that?” you murmur, opening it. 
You smell spring flowers and delicate citrus before it’s taken away, set aside when you nibble and suck at his sensitive ear to make him twitch, hands drifting across his ticklish belly down to his hipbones. He reads your intent again, stopping whatever silly task he’s doing beside you to lift your wrists to his shoulders. 
“The name is a little ironic, isn’t it?” you say, squeezing him experimentally with your thighs as you stroke his nape with your nails. You flex other muscles too–earning the grunt he makes as he feels you squeeze around his girth. 
He angles your head, pressing something wet and soft to where your pulse flutters in your neck. You’re immediately permeated with a light, airy, sweetness, the different scents revealed like a melody that ends in that richer, warmer scent from earlier. 
“Is that my perfume?” you ask. 
“An anointment,” he says, blowing across your skin to dry it and sending a shiver down your spine to where your bodies are locked together, that fullness and muted pleasure of him radiating down to your toes.
“I do seem to have a demon inside of me,” you sigh into his neck as you rest your head against his shoulder. “Do they do that in exorcisms?”
“Blessings,” he corrects, adjusting with another grunt. “We’ll find out if it worked in about an hour.”
“An hour?” you grumble. “You think you can keep torturing me that long?”
“I think I gave you the key to your own cage,” he says, checking his watch. “About five minutes ago. Does it feel like longer?”
You mumble something into his rumpled collar, making him laugh beneath you. Even just that tiny movement has you involuntarily gripping him, abdomen clenched. 
“What’s that?”
“I’llsayitifyoumakemecome,” you repeat, embarrassed enough to hide your face in the crook of his neck again. 
“You think this is a negotiation, Y/N?” Doyoung’s hands are back on your breasts, thumbing the areola in slow circles that are very much a reminder of his touch earlier on your throbbing clit. You whimper, trying to stay still so he doesn’t figure out that if he continues to do that you might have a chance–
“You trying to make me come squeezing me like that?” he asks, breath ragged. “That seems like a quick way to end this.”
“You . . . you could just fuck me,” you wheeze, feeling the way he teases your pebbled, hard nipple with lighter brushes, his mouth quirked where it’s pressed to your forehead. 
“What if I want to make love to you, instead?” he asks. He inhales sharply at your body’s response. 
“Fuck, you liked me saying that, didn’t you?”
You nod, unable to speak, holding onto him in desperation as the combination of his words and soft strokes make you melt into the pleasure of every small motion of him inside you. You realize he’s unconsciously pushing into you, too, unable to keep his hips from pressing into yours. 
Overstimulation is making you hyperaware of the scratch of his unzipped jeans against your burning thighs, the random brush of his open belt against your belly. Time seems to disappear as he holds you quietly, letting you soak up the fragrant, radiating warm reality of him.
“I can wait all night for it,” he threatens, even just his lower register making you quiver a little around him. “Count every time you twitch and moan on me until you break.”
You’d felt him flag a little while he worked but now he’s fuller inside you, stretching you wide as he twitches to life. It’s even hotter than all of this build-up, you think, knowing he can act a menace but that the idea of you surrendering to him is what’s really getting him off.
Of course, you think, mentally steeling yourself like you’re preparing for war. In a way this is something like it, up against as formidable a foe as he is. 
“Doie,” you whisper, threading your hands in his hair as you nuzzle for his lips, kissing him softly and intimately, like it’s your first time. “When did you know?”
“What?” He goes a little rigid against you, unable to hide his rapid heartbeat with how close you’re pressed to him. You blink up at him, expectantly. 
“When did you first know you loved me? Really?”
He smiles, shyly, but you see the hint of anxiety on his features beneath his arousal. There it is, you think, having to hide your own satisfaction. 
“Is this a trick question?” he asks, warily, eyelashes half-lowered.
“Not if I know the answer,” you say, smoothing his kiss-swollen lips with a touch. “I don’t think it’s in that book, either.”
“Really?” He’s intrigued, a tentative rock of his hips against you making you dizzy. “Tell me.”
You shake your head, just as playful. 
“I’ll tell you later,” you say. “After.”
He sighs explosively, nose wrinkling. “You don’t know.”
“Want to bet?” you ask. It’s always a little thrilling seeing Doyoung presented with an opportunity he can’t resist. He fumbles for the notebook beside you, almost slipping out of you when he has to reach even farther for a pen.
“Write it down,” he says, smug as a cat who’s caught something small and easily toyed with. 
“Only if you do, too,” you say.
His answer is a pained sound of agreement, adjusting himself against the desk. 
“No peeking,” you say, flipping to a page in the back. 
“Wait,” he says, grabbing the book before the nib of the nice pen touches the creamy paper. “What are the terms?”
You ponder for a moment, feeling a grin slide onto your lips. “Doesn’t our perfume need a name? Whoever is right, gets to name it.”
You can practically taste his delight as he leans in to kiss you, forcing you to pull your page closer to you. You make him wait, filling the blank space as best you can with detail as he fidgets between your legs, sending small shocks of pleasure through you both. 
“Thank you,” he says in earnest once you’ve handed him it open to a new leaf, his hand and the notebook shaking a little as he tries to write mid-air, finally resting it awkwardly atop your head in order to scrawl out his own answer.
“My eyes are closed, Kim Doyoung.” 
“You’re a cheat,” he says, shushing you with an added thrust of his hips. 
You settle back on your elbows, already enjoying your victory as you feel the tiny pressure of his handwriting, hear the scratches of his sketch. You're more emboldened than ever when the leather binding snaps shut.
“Now tell me,” you say, looking up at him coyly. 
“Can’t I just show you–”
You snatch the book from him, turning to your entry. Then, to his horror, you rip your page free and fold it shut, tucking it into the pocket of his open shirt.
“Tomorrow morning,” you say. “You had 24 hours, right? I’ll give you my answer tomorrow morning.”
Doyoung looks as if he’s tasted something sour. “You won’t tell me.”
“I’ll tell you that you won,” you say, looking down at his page. You trace the fresh ink with care, admiring his tight script and explanation. “February to April? How could I have guessed an entire season?” 
“Did you at least guess the year?” he asks, looking a little better for your affirmation of his win. 
You nod, finally feeling the discomfort of your position and resting your head against his warm chest. There’s nothing awkward about being wrapped around him like this, the late hour and strange, still space making it easier to forget the world outside.
“Hard to forget,” you say. “I thought for sure I’d never see you again after that winter holiday.”
Another break with Johnny, of course–but this one had been your choice. You’d finally felt the crushing weight of two years of contempt from the people around him, the Suh family matriarch at the center of it all, doing everything in her power to crush not only you but the people you loved. 
And then, when you’d needed him the most, Kim Doyoung had walked away from you, too. 
“I didn’t think I’d see you, either,” he sighs. “It was the first time in a long time you weren’t with us. With me. And it was my fault for pushing you away when you were just trying to–”
“It’s in the past now,” you cut him short with a finger pressed to his lips. 
The memory is painful, still–and you don’t want to sully this moment with it. You appreciate that even in his roundabout admission there’s a clear understanding for all you’d been through. You’d hoped he remembered that time from the past, when you’d first peered between the cracks in his carefully-manufactured facade.
Now you could be sure of what it meant to him. You feel like your own walls are crumbling, the light shining through. 
“So you chose the period of time when we didn’t speak to one another, at all?” you muse. “Not just one day?”
“You know what they say. Absence makes the heart grow fonder,” he says. “You were on my mind every minute and every hour of those three and a half months.”
He pauses, sigh warm against your brow. “I couldn’t tell you when I knew, for sure. I certainly couldn’t admit it, then, even to myself. But sometime then, I realized I cared more about you than a friend.”
You’d never doubted he was capable of it, never doubted it might be true. But hearing him admit it, now you know why he wants to hear it from you, too.
“Say it,” you say.
He finally looks at you again, tired but alight with amusement.
“You first,” he says.
“Who knew three simple words would be so difficult for Saint Kim?” you tease him.
“Alright. Come here,” he motions, slipping out of you with a shared groan. He pulls you to a couch under the shuttered window, settling down and forcing you to straddle him. In this position he can’t stop you from immediately taking all of him, his eyelids fluttering when you bottom out.
“You feel like heaven,” he murmurs. 
“You’re not going to last,” you laugh, delighted by the way his nose scrunches when you clench around him. 
“Says the girl who’s sucking me in like you never want me to leave.” He grabs on to your hips to roll them against his own, fingers tightening when you wriggle against him. “You’re gonna say it first even if I have to fuck it out of you.”
“Whoever comes first, then?” you offer.
“I can live with that,” he sighs, head resting back on the couch. 
You rock on your knees slowly, satisfaction warming you throughout as you force him all the way inside you. You let him hear how he makes you feel, pleading sounds and whispers every time he hits that place in your upper walls, curved inside of you perfectly. It doesn’t matter if you're in control you can’t help but hunt down that lovely rush of pleasure in your belly, twining your arms around his shoulders to steady yourself. 
“Good girl,” Doyoung praises, watching you in awe through half-lidded eyes. “You’re so beautiful. I always wanted to know what it would look like when you lost yourself with me.”
His words make you shiver, brushing his lips until he holds you against his mouth to show you how he likes it, less exploratory and more confident. It’s maddening how good he is at this, making you feel every single sweep of his tongue across yours, hand on your neck keeping you from escaping. 
“Don’t you want to–” you protest as he helps you to lay flat on your back across the length of the wide loveseat, settling between your thighs. 
“Oh god, Doie,” you whimper when he takes over, finally, finally, beginning to fuck you. It’s just as slow but at least he penetrates you fully before pulling out almost all the way, shoulders quaking as he holds himself up. 
“Promise me you'll let me dote on you for the rest of your life,” he says, not waiting for your response before driving into you again. His movements are barely controlled, grunts escaping the back of his throat when his hips snap into yours again.  
“I promise,” you hold onto him, back arching off the cushion to meet him, blissed out in the relief of each, careful stroke against your fluttering walls. That crescendo is happening whether you want it to or not, every overworked knot of muscle threatening to snap loose. 
“Promise me that no matter who you fuck you’ll always let me treat you right,” he says, voice breaking. “You’ll let me show you how I feel even when I can’t say it.”
“Yes, Doie. Yes.” You pull down on his shoulders, trying to move for you both, kissing his jaw and throat.
“Stop fighting me and take it,” he says, moving more easily with the thick coat of your cum, establishing a gentle rhythm. 
His voice has always made it hard for you to pay attention to anything else but he abuses that power now, murmuring guidance into your neck that has you tightening around him as he fucks you deep and slow. 
“That’s my girl,” he praises. “You’re taking me so well. Take all of me.”
You feel shivers up and down your body, nipples hardening tight as they brush against his chest, his hair tickling your forehead as he blindly kisses and licks at your mouth and chin. 
You’d thought he’d be concentrating on something else in his head to keep from losing himself but instead it’s you who's floating, breath captured in your lungs when he adjusts on top of you to pin your hips down, pressing your leg wide to bury himself to the hilt.
“You feel so perfect. I could really do this all night, you know,” he smirks down at you from where he’s supported on his elbow. “Is that what you want?”
“No, fuck, please,” you whine. There’s no thoughts in your head besides just how much you want that ache inside of your cunt to melt into real pleasure. 
“You want me to stop?” he asks, feeling how you begin to pulse around him as he swirls his hips up into that most sensitive part of you, his flat belly grinding into your clit. You gasp, leg locking around his, helping him work you apart.
“No no no,” you beg, face hot. “Just . . . just kiss me through it, please.”
Doyoung’s smile grows wider. “Say what you already told me.”
You twist your head against the cushion, earning his hand on your jaw as he makes you look at him while you break, kissing you between panting breaths. His confidence is written in the cocksure grin remaining on his mouth, more cruel when he bites at your bottom lip, hard, before licking the pain away. 
“Say it,” he breathes, slowing down on purpose. 
“I . . . ah,” you cry out, “I love . . . please don’t stop.” 
“What’s that?” he asks, pace punishingly slow. Your legs lose feeling, vibrations starting in the back of your thighs and tremoring down to your feet. 
“Oh god, oh god, oh god,” you repeat, nearly tipping off the edge, “I’m coming, I’m finally–”
He slows down right as you hit that crest, making you cry out in frustration. 
“Doie, I’ll kill you–”
“Say it,” he says into your lips, pulling out–too far–
“Iloveyou,” you exhale, seizing around him in time to your wildly beating heart.
“Louder.” He slams into you again, merciless.
“I love you, you stupid bastard,” you say, hanging on to his shoulders. “I love you!”
“Good enough,” he says, drilling into you until he can feel you break, orgasm sustained through the painful pressure of him losing himself in your throbbing heat, finding your mouth again, finally, to silence the repeated mantra on your tongue.
You kiss him fiercely, unloading everything words aren’t enough for, legs tied around his waist to keep him locked inside you until he’s fighting back, fucking you so hard the sound of it fills the quiet room. 
“I love you,” you repeat a final time for him, just to watch the way it makes him break, jaw slackening when he loses control, finally. 
He stutters into his own orgasm, teeth scraping against your locked lips, forehead pressed into yours as he empties inside you for what feels like forever, finally collapsing on top of you with a whimper when his arms give out and he’s as limp as his cock inside you. 
You scrape your nails across his scalp, soothing him. You don’t mind his weight, or the way you’re still pressed together with sweat and your combined spend. 
“Wasn’t so hard, was it?” he rasps, eyes dazed as he looks up at you. 
“No,” you say, shaking your head tightly. “Not for me, at least.”
“You’re not mad?” 
You know he means his inability to say the magic words but you crack a smile, just as pleased with yourself. 
“About the bet?” you ask. “No.”
Oh, it’s delicious seeing realization dawn on his face, little glimmers of surprise and horror bubbling up from his afterglow. 
“Fuck,” he says. You’re grateful he doesn’t deny it, rolling to the side in defeat. 
“Who told you? ‘Woo?”
You laugh softly, rolling over to pin him down with your leg, trapping him against the back of the couch. 
“You did, right now,” you say, relishing having him where you want him. “I had a hunch. And I know you, you’d never beg for someone to say something during sex–”
“I didn’t beg,” he corrects, grimacing.
“What was it? The first one to get me to say it? Bonus points if it’s on your cock?”
“Ah, well,” he says, perking up despite the fist pressed to his forehead in embarrassment. “Then you don’t know.”
“I’ll find out soon enough, Jaehyun wouldn’t–”
“You’re really not mad?” he asks, painfully reticent as you pull his hand away from his face and twine your fingers together.
“Not if it means I can use it as leverage,” you say, kissing his knuckles.
That doesn’t seem to surprise him, at all. 
“Good girl,” he says. “What do you want?”
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A few years ago, give or take 
You’re a little too happy, an awful fact considering how much he'd missed seeing you this way.
Lately you’ve been sleepwalking through your life, all those tiny fractures and bruises finally having the time to mend–but healing is a painful process in itself. Doyoung had returned from his family’s formal Chuseok gathering in Singapore, eager to check in on you after receiving sparing responses from you via text.
You didn’t have a friend he could check in with instead any longer–not after that one girl had fled the country, the other ghosting you after their father was mysteriously laid off from a company he well knew did business with Suh International. 
He’s worried about you long before that, terrified that one last straw would break you even if by all indications you were strong enough to take it. After you’d had Johnny arrested and solicited a no-contact order you’d cut your ex off completely, moving to a tiny apartment far from where you’d grown up, changing your number. 
Only Jungwoo knew about it, and it was he who’d reluctantly offered your whereabouts to him after a few glasses of whiskey in their usual club. 
“She asked me to keep her info on lockdown. Got that hacker kid, what’s his name–Haechan? Wiped her socials off the map, so he can’t find her. He did good but you know Suh.”
Doyoung nods. They hadn’t seen him in a few weeks, probably because the idiot was combing through every civic office and apartment building in the city. Hell, he’d probably driven around until he found her by sight alone, knowing that animal wouldn’t rest until he knew her whereabouts, as stubborn about chasing her down as he was about refusing the F4’s help. 
“His mother called me to ask if the place he bought in cash was for her,” Doyoung says, knocking back his drink as he receives a text, heart sinking that it's not you. “Did you help him buy it for her?”
Jungwoo sighs. “No. I just got her rent halved with some coercion, you know? But then he goes and buys a unit in the same building with whatever stash he thought the Old Tiger didn’t know about.” 
The Devil Kim leans back, long legs akimbo as he gestures towards the server for a refill. “He’s waiting for her to go back to Chicago before he moves in. But you didn’t hear that from me.”
“I did not,” Doyoung affirms, turning away from the group of women at the bar sending looks towards their private table. “Let’s plan for when Madam Suh leaves. I can have her pull him into the London offices, considering he’s failing his courses.”
“Stone cold,” Jungwoo says, smirking. “Glad I’m not on your shit list.”
“Just don’t fuck with her,” Doyoung says. “Or fuck her.”
Jungwoo laughs into his glass. “Even I’m not that stupid.”
He’d thought he wasn’t, either. 
Not until you’d called a few days later, your speech a little slurred. He couldn’t have told you if what he was doing was important even if he was in a meeting, showing up to find you picking at a bowl of bar snacks in what he thought might be one of the nicer bars in your shitty part of town. Not as shitty as your old neighborhood, but it wasn’t a competition.
“Saint Kim,” you’d heralded him, raising an empty glass still smelling of watermelon and hibiscus. 
“You shouldn’t be drinking alone, here,” he’d said. 
You were dressed in one of your few nice outfits, a little on the revealing side for his tastes, but those had been Johnny’s you’d conformed to–animal print and thin straps, tastefully tasteless.
“I wasn’t,” you say, hiccuping. “Alone.”
For the first time in a long time fear spikes his blood pressure into overgear. Were you drugged? Was he going to have to fend off another predator who'd found you vulnerable?
You deserved the chance to move on but there was a real threat in what would happen to anyone who approached you without their permission. Johnny’s, yes, always, but the F4 had also agreed to look out for you well before your last incident at a club. 
“Who?”
“She left,” you say. He feels instant relief, reaching out to adjust the thin coverup slipping off your bare shoulder. 
“You make a new friend?”
You shake your head. “She’s nice. Met her in one of the ikebana classes work is paying for. Thought we were hitting it off but I must have said something dumb because she ran out of here, fast.”
You look up at him cautiously, too inebriated to realize he can recognize a set-up before it begins.
“You didn’t just talk about your ex, did you?” he asks, settling beside you at the bar. He orders something less ridiculous than whatever you'd been drinking, while you scroll through an Instagram feed, finger trembling over the screen. 
You look up at him, color-stained lips curving in an easy smile. “You want to see what we’re working on?”
Doyoung finds himself looking through a grid that is immediately obvious is not yours. His mouth goes dry, seeing rows of beautifully-staged floral centerpieces, the backgrounds as familiar as the back of his hand. You don’t seem to notice, going to the user’s story and tapping in vain to find the picture she’d posted.
“She deleted it already. Huh. Well, she texted me the picture–”
“Stop.” Doyoung places his hand over yours, his palm damp from the immediate flood of adrenaline. 
“So you do know Mona,” you say. You look up at him, expectantly, eyes glassy with the brand of hopefulness and naked curiosity he’s seen you charm everyone else around you with before. 
“She’s the one, isn’t she?”
Doyoung pulls cash from his pocket, not caring how much he puts down except that he’s sure it’s enough to cover the amount he’d like to drown himself in right now. Enough to go blind and burn out the phantom of that face he’d put behind him years ago. 
“Put your coat on,” he says. “I’m driving you home.”
“But I’m not–”
“Now,” Doyoung says, grabbing your wrist. He’s barely ever touched you in the years that you’ve been friends, and it sickens him when he feels you freeze in fear and confusion, that trauma response buried so deeply it's in your bones.
He wants to be kind, he wants to be patient with you. He just doesn’t have it in him to be anything to you right now.
“What’s wrong, Do–?”
“We’re leaving,” he says, dragging you out into the bitter cold evening, the streets slick with sleet, your heels catching on the pavement as you stumble in his wake.
“Stop,” you yell at his back, trying to yank your arm free from where he’s bruising your skin with whitened knuckles. “You’re hurting me–”
“You’ll live,” he says, pulling you to where he’s parked his car, the engine roaring to life the moment you manage to close your door. He can barely look at you, realizing too late that your crestfallen expression is making him more upset than the lightning strike of seeing her name again.
“You didn’t ask my address,” you say, quietly, met with his silence as he drives much more dangerously than the weather permits. He's forced to speak with you once he's slammed the brakes at an intersection, red light shading you through the windshield.
“Tell me one thing,” he says. “Did you try to set us up by having me come there?”
You’re petulantly silent now, an answer in itself.
“Answer me,” he orders, hands gripping the wheel.
“I thought you’d want to–”
“Do you think we have the kind of relationship where you can just do whatever you want and get away with it?” Doyoung’s voice is calm but he sees you flinch at his words and tone, your shoulders moving under your jacket as you begin to quietly cry. 
It drives him deeper into anger, hitting the gas with a roar of the engine the instant the light turns green. 
“You don’t get to feel sorry for yourself for this one, Y/N,” he says, already regretting every word tumbling out of his mouth. “You fucked up.”
“I just thought you could both have some closure after that–”
The car jerks as he brakes in the side lane of the service road, cars roaring past them honking their horns. Your sobs are barely audible over the idling engine and the blink of the hazards he turns on while he tries to find calm, your face turned away from him. 
“You thought that interfering in other people’s personal lives would make you feel better,” he says. “No wonder you don’t have any real friends.”
Out of the corner of his eye he can see your full body shakes still, can feel as that armor encasement you’d put together piece-by-piece over years of dealing with loveless reality falls back into place. And, years later–no, even hours later–he’ll remember how at the time he was stupid enough to think it was the right thing to say. 
You needed a reality check, he’d thought. A reminder that all the wishes and hopes in the world wouldn’t change the bleak architecture of it, uncaring by design and much easier to navigate without them. That moving on was the only path to this idiot’s dream of closure, something you knew nothing about for how often you’d let them pull you back into their world, blinded by sunk-cost and loneliness. 
All the things he wished he believed for himself, but without the benefit of your optimism.
“Fuck you, Kim Doyoung,” you say, opening the car door and slamming it shut without so much as a glance behind you. He’d waited to make sure you reached the nearest bus stop before driving off, calling Jungwoo to let him know you were here–crying in the cold. 
He'd seen you in passing.
His best friend knew a lie when he’d heard it, most especially from him. 
He wouldn't hear from you again until spring.
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Kim Doyoung can’t sleep. 
He’s not allowed to. 
He can’t move either, arm going numb beneath your curled body, your breathing finally easing for the dozenth time since his trial began. You have horrible sleep habits–kicking off the covers, stealing the pillows–but tonight you’ve passed out with that same bone-deep tiredness he’d felt earlier, face beatific in the slivers of light piercing through the slatted shades. 
It’s close to dawn, he thinks, the cacophony of insects and birds outside transitioning from a quiet chorus to a full orchestral suite. Soon it will be too loud to sleep deeply. 
“Y/N?” he whispers, tentatively, not daring to move.
You don’t respond, relief rushing through him. It’s not that he’s desperate to join you in slumber but that he’s waited for you to finally surrender to REM. He needed you down. 
And you needed it, too. 
He’d negotiated with Jaehyun when you’d been in the shower, earlier, sacrificing precious moments of shared time exploring your skin and the new taste of you under the water to supplicate himself to his best friend and worst enemy in this moment.
“It’s a charter,” Jaehyun said, blinking sleep from his eyes but awake enough to be angry. “You’re not finding another one short term.”
“I emailed you the tickets. Cattle car but first class, at least,” he says. “Jungwoo agreed to give you his day, he doesn’t want to take her out until after dark, anyway. You can sleep in tomorrow.”
“Fine.” Jaehyun had slammed the door shut in his face, but he hadn’t missed the budding smile on his friend’s face. At least one person was rooting for him.
That’s how he’d earned another morning with you. As always, making up for lost time.
You’re half out of the covers, one leg sprawled over the duvet as you sleep. You’d put on one of his softer button-downs, inhaling the smell of it after he tried to steal it back. 
“Please let me wear you,” you said. “I want to dream about you.”
Being around you like this is more comfortable than he imagined, as if you’re being slotted into a position he didn’t even know there was an existing space for. He’s woken up to women in his bed but you’re the first who’s ever asked him for this, particular experience.
“I used to have this fantasy, you know, whenever we crashed at your apartment.” He’d watched you go sheepish recalling, dates omitted for a reason. “Sometimes I’d lie there and touch myself thinking about you crawling into that guest bed–maybe a little drunk or you’d forget which room. Or maybe, you just wanted me to think that. I’d be awake but I’d pretend to be asleep while you . . . used me.” 
He experiments by tracing his fingertips up your bare leg, the peek of your lace underwear beneath the hem of his shirt maddening for how it curves into the crest of your ass, presented for him. A treat dangled before him, the command to partake only that you wanted him to make it slow–you wanted to wake to it.
He sucks a breath in, erection in his sweatpants hard against the band already from just watching his sleeping beauty. He finds every mark on your leg, every fine hair, thanking Heaven above you aren’t overly sensitive or ticklish like he is when his hand slips beneath his shirt to your belly. 
He slots himself against you, carefully, as if adjusting in his sleep. He has to wait for your breathing to even out again, slipping his free hand up to your breasts. 
“Used you? Did you not get off in this scenario?”
“I mean, yes. But it’s mostly about you. You wouldn’t say anything at all, you’d just fuck me full of your cum and then you’d leave me leaking it on your sheets and go back to your room. Or sometimes I’d crawl in your bed, if you were alone, and you’d cover my mouth so the others couldn’t hear it. And the next day it would be like nothing happened, you wouldn’t even bother to ask how I’d slept.” 
He loved how much of a slut you were, when you felt comfortable enough to share that side with someone. Johnny had certainly never appreciated the subtleties of your nature–too blinded by adoration to even consider degrading you on purpose. 
No, Doyoung had known for awhile you pushed the boundaries with him to see if he’d break.
Your nipples harden even though he’s barely handling them, discovering what shape your breasts make in repose as he tries desperately not to rut into the swell of your ass. Warming himself in you earlier had been one of the hardest challenges he’d faced but it had been worth it to learn you inside and out, to know how to make you grip his cock with that delicious little cunt of yours with just a kiss or a word that pleased you.  
You don’t wake but he knows he’s gotten through to that little lizard brain of yours when your legs rub together unconsciously, pushing back into him so his cock is settled between your buttocks. The friction from the lace is like the proverbial pea under a mattress–rubbing against his cock through the layers, catching on the veins and scraping the underside of his cockhead. 
It’s already a nice ache, one he ignores as he adjusts to better continue plucking and teasing at your body beneath your shirt, until you’re used to his touch enough to truly fall back under, once more.
You're so vulnerable, completely at his mercy as he brings his hand down to test the patch of moisture growing in the fabric, that lace sticky with your dreams of him. 
Use you, he thinks. You have no idea what he wants. 
Doyoung can play with the fantasy of you crawling into your boyfriend’s best friend’s bed while he’s passed out in the other room, determined to be punished for waking a sleeping monster . . . but it’s not what he's fantasizing about now. 
He takes time in stroking you, a single finger digging in between your lips through the fabric, listening intently for your breathing to change. You sigh, one of those full exhales one does in their deep sleep, but you arc back a little, into his touch, leg falling forward crooked so you’re a little more spread. 
Doyoung wishes he could move down there and use his nose to push you apart instead of his hand but that’s not your fantasy–not this time. You didn’t want him to spoil you anymore, completely underestimating his love for it. True, he didn’t often eat other girls out, too personal or just too much of a chore to figure out what they liked, but you weren’t ever going to be with him and not come from that first. 
Just the thought of tying you up so he can spend hours fucking you on his tongue is making his cock pulse, too hard to be ignored. He quietly pulls down the drawstring of his sleepwear, freeing himself so he can replace his finger with the much wider tip of his cock, biting back a groan as he rubs into that damp, soft lace he’d known would suit you the moment he’d touched it in the display box brought to his private buying room. 
You'd never know he’d already fucked himself with it before ever giving it to you, that errant fantasy of touching you finally realized as you whimper a little in your sleep at the soft push of him between your legs. He finds where your clit is getting just as swollen as the rest of you, bouncing against warmth and the promise of unspooling that need with his help, again.
Just his precious little cocksleeve, spoiled and worshiped, showing your gratitude by begging for it even when you’re unconscious. He tests the waters of the scenario by slowly pulling the seat of your underwear to the side, easing in between the fabric and your folds. 
You twitch against him, sheets rustling. He holds still, cock jumping and balls tightening with a little anxiety. 
He only has this one chance. 
Outside in the dark and quiet of the house sleeps the man everyone knows you’re really with, the one who doesn’t have to fight for an I love you to pass your lips. You’d never understood what it felt like watching you climb into Jaehyun’s lap whenever the whim took you, pretending you didn’t know what it did to him or the other two of them watching you.
Your breathing is shallow and your hand flexes a bit, against the pillow, but that’s it. Within a minute he’s grown more confident that you’re still asleep.
He reaches over you, pressing the pads of two fingers against the front of your underwear while he slips a little deeper between your legs, eyes almost rolling back in his head at the contrast between the satiny slide of you and the rougher cling of your panties. It’s a relief as he loses himself to it, rutting from the back while he applies constant pressure to your bud.
“Mmm.” You make a soft noise, but he doesn’t pull free, choosing instead to keep a hypnotizingly steady pace fucking against you. Your hips twitch against him, seeking out more contact, but he doesn’t rush–pressing his head against the back of yours and melding with you in the softness of the pillows and sheets. 
You’re so wet you’re soaking his pants, everything he collects tickling down to his balls pressed into your ass. He’s going to stuff your mouth with his fingers, when you finally open it, make you gag on them while he fills you full from behind. 
You moan now, voice syrupy with sleep. He doesn’t care if you’re still down, not with you gently pushing back, trying to get release.  
Not yet, you little harlot, he thinks, hips going still again. He’s burning at the wait, your cunt continuing to glide against him as you act out whatever is going on in your dreams, the movement making him insane for how closely it adheres to his desire to have taken you back when you were innocent, his little virgin weed learning what her body wanted, seeking it out in his bed.
“Treat me like one of the girls you don’t really like. Use me.”
Such an unending fantasy of yours that he never wanted you, almost sweet for how dumb you are–or just willfully ignorant. He’s always liked the second one better–your little game played out that you were one of them. Dressed in that school uniform, kicking your skinned knees, sucking on a piece of candy while four college-age idiots hid their bathing-suited boners under their robes, fighting or fucking around in front of you so you could keep up that precious little illusion of immunity. 
“Johnny,” you murmur in your sleep. 
It should make his blood run cold but as with all twisted-up and tangled desires it only makes him feel ignited, pulse pounding in his head. You’re still asleep and thinking of someone else, someone not even in this house, the guilt of it passing over him faster than a cloud on a breezy day. 
He rocks back into you, this time pulling out enough that he can find your soft hole, already tight again–the only part of your body not relaxed as he forces his way past the flutter of your opening, cockhead sensitive enough to sense the more textured g-spot where he knows you’ll come fast and easy if he fucks into it. 
“Shh,” he says, finally trailing his mouth against your jaw, pushing into you softly. “Go back to sleep, baby.”
“Mmhmm,”  you reply, nuzzling into the pillow, curling into him. He pushes a knee between your legs, folding you into the bed beneath him as he begins to fuck you, finally taking you for himself and himself alone. 
You’re so warm inside, body adjusting to take him easily for how boneless you are, kitten-like mewls muffled by the pillow. It turns him on hearing the edge of pain there, the way you struggle when he pulls your underwear up so tight it sticks between your folds, clit rubbing against it the way he’d stroked himself to completion with it tied tight around his cock.
“Stay quiet or I’ll stuff your mouth full instead,” he whispers against your shoulder, feeling as always a little stupid but losing that internal cringe when you choke on a moan.
“Is that what my little slut was dreaming about? Gagging to tears on another man’s cock?”
He feels you tense at a bit at the suggestion, letting him use you in spite of the rougher handling. 
“That’s right. You said another man’s name in your sleep. Do you think that's acceptable?”
You shake your head, whimpering. 
“Such a whore you can't keep track of who's dick is inside of you. Tell me, who's fucking you right now?” 
“Doie,” you say, music to his ears. He'd always hated the nickname until you started using it. You were the only one–you were always the only one who made his chest burn with unsated desire when you said his name.
“Who owns this tight little pussy?” 
“You do,” you gasp out. 
“Are you going to forget me? Maybe I need to fuck you so hard you only think of me when you spread your legs for another man.” 
Doyoung feels electric at how easily you begin to crumble with just a few words, squeezing his dick so tight when he says something you like, even more when he makes it hurt. 
“Sleepy baby going to let me stuff every one of your holes until I’ve had enough? Use you like my own little doll?”
You nod, no longer capable of speaking except in a plaintive moan when he leaves you to shuck off his pants and pull down your ruined panties, pillow pulled beneath your belly to force your ass up. In this position he can drill into you deeper, burying you into the mattress with each thrust. 
“That’s what you get for crawling in here,” he says, fingers digging bruises into your hips to hold you down. “Keep your mouth shut and take it.”
The pleading, almost scared noises you're making have him hard and pulsing, two steps away from coming himself but in no hurry to. He pulls your hair to bring your head back, shoving his fingers in your mouth. 
“You like that?” Your cunt can't hide it, sucking him in. “Get them wet for me.” 
You drool over his knuckles, gagging as he fucks your mouth with them in an awkward rhythm to his merciless rutting. He spits into his hand when he's satisfied, fingers swirling around the tight rim of your ass so quickly it makes you buck. 
“Don't scream,” he murmurs, giving you two fingers at once. You make a noise through the pillow you're biting, gripping him tight. He's gentler with this, slowing, letting you adjust to take him.
“This is my favorite, right here,” he groans. “Feeling my cock inside you with my fingers. I'd fuck this tight little ass again but I want to feel you come like this.” 
He begins to stroke you harder, deeper, wet and sticky when his balls slap against your abused cunt. He keeps his fingers buried in you, scissoring you open as you take it.
“Come for me, Y/N, grip me good so I can fill that pretty mouth of yours.” 
It's a beautiful feeling when you begin to throb, contractions in your ring of muscle letting him know when you hit your peak. He fights the tingling in his balls, the urge to come with you painful for how long he's been holding it back. 
He talks you through it, instead.
“Such a good little hole,” he says. “You're coming so hard, baby, can feel it so well.” 
You moan, loud, as you break, loosening almost immediately, flooding him with sweet, hot warmth. He makes sure the last of those tics is gone before pulling out.
“Roll over,” he says, straddling you with a hand on the headboard, delighted by the sight of your flushed face and starry eyes. You already know what to do, tongue lolling and uvula exposed as he guides himself into your mouth, soft tongue swirling around his tip. 
God help him he's been thinking about this since yesterday, pushing deep enough to gag but not choke, fucking your mouth and the hot tightness of your throat when he hits it. It’s the sight more than anything that drives him to spill hot white ropes of cum into your mouth, pulling out to milk the last few splashes on your parted lips and delighting at the sight of you licking them with your spend-covered tongue.
“You’re so perfect,” he says, dropping down and kissing you, finally, tongues stroking each other until you finally pull free to breathe, blinking up sleepily at him. 
“You do taste different,” you tease.
“I taste like you,” he says, pressing soft kisses all over your face. “My sweet, sweet girl.”
“Did you like that?” you murmur. 
“I loved–” he pauses, watching the smile spread on your wet lips. 
“I love you, you know,” he finishes. You reach around his neck, comforting him out of instinct, but he doesn’t need it. 
“I love you,” he repeats, testing the words on his tongue now that they've flown out so easily, the tightness in his chest easing as you rise up to kiss him. 
“It's beautiful to hear you say it,” you say. “But you're right, I know.”
“I think I even know the exact time and date,” you say, reaching between you into the pocket of your shirt to pull out that torn and folded art paper scrawled with your words and an amateurish sketch.
Tomorrow morning . . .
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[Unknown number] [Tomorrow morning April 13th dawn is at 6:17] [I have something to show you. Meet me on the roof of the East Wind Hotel]
Doyoung looks at the text message again, hand hanging over the railing of a dance floor, conversation with the woman by his side forgotten. With the blur of a late night and a trip to a different hotel room, with a different woman, he'd almost missed it.
Probably one of the innumerable flings he's had, Jungwoo recruiting him to get every last lick of enjoyment out of Seoul before he enlisted. His friend snatches the phone from his hand.
“No business,” Jungwoo slurs, eyes bloodshot as he focuses on the text. “I thought you weren't working hospitality anymore.” 
“It's not . . .” There's something nagging at him, like a bird pecking at his skull in time to the drone of the EM, the buzz of conversation. A sense of deja vu so strong he's forced to cycle on it. 
“Pfft. I know you don't bring girls back to your kingdom,” Jungwoo says. “Stop working and party.”
Doyoung doesn't know why he feels compelled to see the cryptic message through, doesn't know why he races across town at 5 am, reeking of whiskey and another woman’s perfume, doing his best to sober up as the designated driver talks about the change in weather, the cherry blossoms in full bloom outside the window.
The morning commute is already surging and the destination central to the city so by the time he makes it he's out of breath from running two blocks away from a jam, head pounding.
“ . . . restricted for non-guests,” someone is saying, voice recognizable as an intern he knows from his leadership program, still stuck on night front desk duty. 
“I just need a few minutes, please. I need to take a picture–” He'd recognize that voice in a hundred years if he hadn't heard it, not just a hundred days.
“What's going on here?” 
You freeze, shoulders stiffening as you turn to face him. Not much has changed–a new haircut, same ratty old sneakers–but you look different. No longer a ghost, but just as untouchable for the skittish way you hold when he approaches, only the barest relief on your beautiful features.
You don't smile, don't even say hello.
You're scared of him, again, just that thought making him spiral.
“You came,” you say, exhaling. “We need to hurry. We need to get to the roof.”
Doyoung turns to the staff. “Is the roof access still shut down?”
“Stair access only, sir.” 
Your eyes go wide at the interchange, something like embarrassment passing over your features as you begin to laugh. 
“Of course this is your hotel,” you state, smacking yourself on the forehead. “Of course, why didn't I think to check that. God, I'm an idiot.” 
“We didn’t change the name when we acquired the chain so it would be unlikely for you to have guessed that,” he says. “What are you doing here?” 
“There's no time and it's easier just to show you. We need to get to the roof, now,” you say, grabbing his wrist and tugging on it towards the stairs. 
“Y/N,” he says, holding you fixed and pointing at the elevator. “We can take it up as far as we need to.” 
You're still laughing maniacally twenty floors up. “I was going to cry if I had to go up another flight of stairs.” 
“Are you really taking pictures?” He asks, gesturing at your camera.
“No, but I started carrying it the first time someone called the police on me thinking I was going to jump,” you giggle, wiping away tears. He feels delirious from lack of sleep, so maybe you are, too, but it doesn't seem to be the case as you spring out the doors, forcing him to guide you when you're lost in the executive suite hallways.
“I managed to sneak in last time, otherwise I wouldn't have gotten this far. I'm glad you came just in time, I think they were going to kick me out.”
He's surprised at how easily things have snapped back into place between you, no mention of anything that's happened as you race up the stairwell to the roof access. 
“Will you tell me–”
“Oh thank god,” you say once your through the heavy doors and collapsed on the green helipad, growing impatient when he props the door open out of habit. He's been up here many times, nothing remarkable about the space besides the legacy sign on top, view crowded by other buildings at varying levels. 
“Stand here,” you say, pushing him into place, turning him by the arms. “Do you see it?”
“I don't even know what I'm looking for,” he says, beginning to grow annoyed. 
“Look over there, at the People's Bank. Relax your eyes, it will only take a minute.”
He feels increasingly foolish but he does what you ask, cool morning breeze clearing his muddled head. The sky is washed in a pink and blue haze, the sun cresting the more mountainous region of the city behind you to bathe the city in solid gold.
“There,” you breathe, letting out a little sigh.
“What?” All he can see is a few birds passing over the vista of crowded advertisements and neon. 
“Do you see the light?” you ask. 
“There's tons of lights–” he begins, cut short by the blinding catch of the sun's reflection on one of the characters, then another. He spells it out slowly, guided by your hand holding his to each one. 
The bank: Sa. 
The next building over, also burning brighter with the touch of the sun: Rang. 
Then an advertisement that has been up long enough most of the original message is lost. Hae.
“How did you find this?” he asks, knowing it would be impossible for him to have ever seen this without knowing the trick of the light. 
“I didn't find it. Well I did–I had to search some buildings for it.” 
Later he'll find out you climbed close to fifty flights of stairs in the last two months, had spent every waking moment not working or in school breaking into buildings before sunrise to find that exact spot, forever amused at the thought you hadn’t checked his family's flagship hotel first.
“You don't remember getting the same message from someone else?” you ask. “I was worried you wouldn't come, again.”
Again. Something tugs the memory up from the oubliette he'd locked it into, Mona teasing him about sleeping in and missing their appointment.
Mona. 
His stomach falls, checking back behind him at the door as if that particular ghost will return to haunt him.
“She's not here. I wasn't trying to set you up,” you say, recognizing the dismay he can't hide. “Honestly. And I know whatever closure you find is yours and yours alone. You were right about that, too, I'm sorry.”
You twist your hands in front of you, suddenly overwhelmed with anxiety. “I did this for me. Because I wanted to know what she tried to tell you, even if she couldn't say it aloud.”
You don't look at him, can't in order to continue. Doyoung feels like a live wire, exposed, two months of painful loneliness and a lifetime's worth of avoidance of this fact all surging through him in this moment. 
As much as he would prefer to leave he's not going to run like he did back then, when he'd ignored the hard parts to pretend like a friendship wasn't something more. Not with the stakes of losing this one.
“You once told me you were just friends, even if you couldn't be one anymore for her after you realized you loved her. How it broke you to be with someone you couldn't be with, who wanted something different.”
“Now you know. She didn't want to stay one, either,” you say. You look up at him nervously, regaining your confidence.
“I just wanted you to know that you were loved, Kim Doyoung. You still are.” 
You turn away towards the door, pretending not to have seen the tears dripping down his face under his glasses. He ignores them, too, not knowing what to say or do to make sure you never leave him again.
The spot never mattered to him, the word and it's confession forgotten in time. What changed that day was having you in front of him after so long, the way you were a reflection of him so many years ago, fighting to be by the side of someone who didn't know how to love you back, the right way.
He'd promised himself than that even if he couldn't say it, he'd show you.
“Thank you for coming. I'm sorry for interfering with your life, but that’s what friends do.”
You'd almost made it to the stairs when he'd wrapped around you from behind, the first ever time he'd held you in an embrace, unsurprised to find you shaking like a leaf as he rested a wet cheek against your hair. 
“I'm sorry,” he says. “Thank you.” 
You relax a little, squeezing his hand. In that small gesture everything is reset, everything is okay again. They won't talk about this for the next few years, even when Jungwoo asks how you'd come back into their lives so suddenly and without any indication that things had changed.
But they had. Deeply. 
“You can make it up to me by buying me breakfast,” you say, smiling up at him, wiping his cheek with your sleeve. “We have a lot to catch up on.” 
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“Did I win?” you ask. 
Doyoung can only laugh, giddy, as you burrow into his side to smother him in kisses and teasing. You were put on this earth to challenge him, after all–always right there to match him in stubbornness and competition.
He presses his nose to your neck, inhaling the remnants of the scent you'd made together, one bottle for each, though you didn't have to know his formula was just a bit different.
“‘Tomorrow Morning’ has a nice ring to it, I suppose. It lingers well.”
“It was my answer, actually. I needed to see if I could break Saint Kim's vow of romantic abstinence before I made up my mind,” you say, smug as you move to get up. “Glad you were able to find out before your time was–”
You shriek as he pulls you down again, pinning you to the bed. 
“I still have a few hours,” he says, voice dangerous. “I'd like to hear you say it again.”
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mochidoie · 4 months
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kim doyoung x reader wc - 8.7k genre - very slow burn, frenemy to lovers (light banter), coworkers!au, roomates!au warnings - a small kiss scene
You and Doyoung coexist in two specific ways: cohabitation and as coworkers. However, your friendship, if you can call it that, is far from besties and more on being cordial with one another. Nonetheless, in this dreary corporate world, he is the only one who just gets you and despite his coldness, he feels the same about you.
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Doyoung annoyingly types on his keyboard in the cubicle next to you, completely disrupting your concentration and general workflow. Groaning, you hope that it was enough to signify how irritated you were. However, instead of the obnoxious typing coming to a halt, it intensifies tenfold and catches the attention of everyone else who sits on this floor.
Embarrassment washes over your body as you forcibly stand up and peer over the short wall that divides both of your desks. “Knock it off.” You gently smack the back of Doyoung’s head and he winces forward, looking up at you immediately with a glare.
“I’m seriously going to report you to HR one day.” He whispers, his threat just barely sounds legitimate. Doyoung is the greatest at bluffing and empty threats. 
“Well today won’t be the day. You’re typing so loud that it could be a noise complaint.” Rolling your eyes, you drop back down into your seat. Smoothly swiveling your chair back to the intimidating project blown full screen on your monitor, you dread every minute of being here. Your day is full of reports, documentations, and boring project meetings. 
You’ll have small talk about the weather in the break room over some watered down coffee made by a machine and happy hours on random days of the week at the nearby upscale restaurant.
You’ll run into someone from another department on the elevators and feel awkward for several floors until one of you finally gets out. Hiding in the bathroom is the only escape from the depressing gray carpet and fluorescent indoor lighting. 
“You could make this a more enjoyable workplace if you didn’t sigh every three minutes.” Doyoung walks around to your cubicle, crossing his arms like the prick he always is.
“I’m sighing because you keep typing for all of the world to hear you.” You turn in your chair, facing him once again with your lips in a line. “Get out of my space.”
“I’m not in your space.” You watch as he slyly backs up from the wall, the tips of his shoes barely skimming the invisible line that crosses into your cubicle. “What is the bad mood for today?” Doyoung raises an eyebrow.
You despise when someone points out your attitude, it just feels completely unnecessary to bring up in conversation. However, you are normally less mean to him and Doyoung was a sensitive individual. “Rough start this morning, my bread got jammed in the toaster and flat tire on my way to work.”
“This is why I tell you to use the oven and to carpool with me. The carbon footprint we could minimize by just using one car is astronomical.” He shoves his hands into his pressed pants pockets, “I guess this is why I didn’t see your car in the lot this morning.”
“It’s in the shop. I’m out of a car for about two weeks because they found something wrong with the engine or something.” 
“Just your luck.”
You groan, “are you just going to nag and pity me, or are you going to offer me a ride home?” 
Doyoung puts his hands up in the air, as he often speaks with his hands. “You’re always welcome to ride with me. You just normally refuse.” 
“Yeah, because it looks weird if we got into the same car together.” 
He shrugs, “people already know we live together. What’s the big deal about it?”
“It’ll look like we’re … you know… Together.” You keep your voice down to a whisper, afraid for any nosy ears listening into business they aren’t a part of. Doyoung nearly throws himself forward laughing at your shifty eyes and your sheepish statement.
“Seriously? I think people can tell we’re far from ever being together.” Ouch. Not that you had any romantic interest in this vile man, but it was a bigger blow to your ego if anything.
It’s also the way Doyoung says it. It’s pure mockery, a joke that you even though there was a slim chance at the consideration of you two being together. 
You shrug him off, ignoring how snobby he is being. “People make rumors. Someone who isn’t close to us can see me getting into your car and get the wrong idea.” Turning around, Doyoung takes the signal that he probably pissed you off more than he intended to.
He sighs and walks up behind your chair. Placing two hands on your shoulders, you slightly flinch at the sudden physical contact. Doyoung leans down to whisper gently into your ear, “let them think what they want.” It sends a shiver down your spine and you don’t have a snarky comment to say back to him.
The sound of his shuffling disappears as he returns back to his side and resumes his typing. You aren’t excited to tackle the task in front of you, if anything, you wish Doyoung annoyed you for a bit longer.
The suffocating dullness of the office wrings any ounce of creativity out of you. You’re like a wet towel that was left too long out in the sun and now you’re all dry and crunchy. 
A swoosh notification catches your eye, a new email from your manager in your inbox for you to worry about. Letting out another sigh of the day, you’re wondering what minuscule thing she needs now. The subject line already has you rolling your eyes and did you really want to open it? Not really. 
FROM PATRICIA A.
HALLOWEEN CELEBRATION: HH AT 127 BAR AND RESTAURANT
Hello Team,
I hope you’re all having a productive day so far. Our VPs have organized a company happy hour for all to attend. Please refer to the infographic attached to this email for information in regards to the Halloween happy hour event that is being held next week at the 127 Bar and Restaurant. 
RSVP through here by the EOD on Friday. Your attendance is highly encouraged as this will be a chance for everyone to network and chat with our VPs. Appropriate Halloween costumes are mandatory for attendance to be considered. Hope to see you all there. 
Best, Patricia A. Regional Manager 
“Costumes, are you fucking kidding me?” You hear Doyoung over your wall, followed by a ferocious clicking noise. 
“Don’t worry, Kim. You won’t need one, you’re already scary looking as is.” Jumping up, you place your elbows on the counter of his wall and peer over him. Doyoung rolls his eyes and stands to level the eye contact.
“You might want to get one, don’t want our VPs to get too scared seeing your face.” His eyebrow raises as he watches your face contour in disgust. He scoffs, closing his laptop and putting his monitor on sleep mode. He makes his way out to the hallway.
“Where are you going?” Your nosiness gets the best of you, not that you actually cared much about Doyoung’s whereabouts.
“On my way to ask our pretty receptionist what costume she’s going in.” He smirks, making a direct line toward the elevators. Slumping back into your chair, you hover your cursor over the RSVP link. Another damn happy hour. 
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Doyoung whistles his way out of the elevator as it dings on the lobby level of the office. Around the corner, he is met with the office receptionist with her hair neatly framing her face and red lips curving into a smile as she greets him. 
“Good afternoon Daisy, how are you today?” He rummages through the candy bowl full of mints and dental gum, despite never really caring for sweet cavity inducing treats.
Daisy leans forward on her desk with her sweet smile never leaving her pretty face. “I’m good, how are you?” She knows Doyoung as the man that would often stop by at random hours of the day for small talk and a mint. Not entirely knowing that he was mostly there to see her, she indulges in the light conversation with the nice man. 
“Happy that it’s Thursday, as usual.” Doyoung tears the mint wrapper with his teeth. His forearm is placed comfortably on the counter of the desk as he leans forward chatting with Daisy. 
“Friday is so close.” Daisy says excitedly, clapping her hands together in a cheery youthful manner. “Any weekend plans?”
“Probably going to see the new movie in theaters with a friend.” Truthfully, Doyoung never really has weekend plans set. He spends his weekends indoors and locked behind his door. A true mystery as to what he does behind it. “Not sure though, I’ll see how I’m feeling in the morning.”
“Yeah, I get that. I try to get out of my house during the weekend so that I’m still productive, even though all I want is to relax in bed.” She chuckles and instantly, Doyoung smiles at her relatability and honesty. Her energy is contagious, he always feels a burst whenever he speaks to her. 
“Hey, I mean to ask, do you have a costume in mind for the happy hour next week?” Doyoung suckles the spicy peppermint, rocking it back and forth between each cheek. Daisy ponders for a second and he finds an opportunity to make a very bad joke. “Anything to do with flowers perhaps? Because you’re Daisy.” He laughs at his own joke and she lightly gives in to such a corny question.
“That would be funny,” she laughs, “but I’m not sure if I can attend. I let Patricia know that I’ll be attending my boyfriend’s sister’s engagement party that night.” What a glass shattering moment as Doyoung was not aware that Daisy had a boyfriend. Then again, a woman like her wouldn’t be stuck being single and moping about her sad love life like his own cubicle roommate coworker, y/n.
“Darn, we’ll miss you there then.” Doyoung finds a way to exit the conversation, knowing his heart is already breaking thinking about Daisy spending her weekends out and about with another man. The fantasy of her is ruined.
“Aw, thank you Doyoung.” Daisy reaches underneath her desk and pulls out a familiar looking earbud case, “also, are you able to hand this back to y/n? They dropped this on their way in, but they were already rushing into an elevator before I could catch them. You two are dating, right?”
Doyoung’s lips part open in shock, hearing those words come from Daisy’s mouth entice a strange feeling. His initial reaction is to deny it, clearly, but she looks at him with such awe that he doesn't know what to say. “Where did you hear that?”
“Oh, I overheard a few people chatting about you two. I think people said you two moved in with each other after 5 months of dating.” Daisy innocently explains. “My boyfriend and I could never move in together, at least, not yet. I feel like we have to hit that two year mark before deciding to do so.” 
He chuckles awkwardly, unsure what he is more surprised about: Daisy’s boyfriend or the fact that there are actual rumors that he and y/n are dating. “We’re not dating, just roommates. We’re not even really close.”
“Oh, I’m sorry! I really thought you two were dating. Please don’t tell them I said anything.” Daisy covers her mouth and Doyoung accepts the earbuds. 
“Don’t worry, I won’t.” He forces a smile, bidding a small see you later to Daisy before heading back upstairs to his boring job. The dating rumor invades every part of his thoughts as he tosses the case back and forth between his hands. He is going to murder whoever spread such a heinous lie.
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“Maybe we should stagger when we leave. I’ll go first and start my car, then you come down ten minutes later, walk around the lot and then get into my car.” Doyoung nibbles on his granola bar, leaning against the sink counter. Drying your tupperware, you stare at him in confusion.
“Why such an elaborate plan to just go home?” You question.
Doyoung shakes his head at you, as if you don’t think about the potential risks lying ahead. “Like you said, people start rumors so we should be careful.” 
Halting all your actions completely, you blink blankly at a nervous Doyoung. “You heard something, didn’t you?” 
“When did I–”
“Doyoung, I will rip that granola bar out of your hand. What was it?” 
He neatly places the wrapper back on, setting it down and crossing his arms. “There are rumors of us dating and that we moved in with each other after five months of dating, which in itself is already ridiculous. Obviously, I would wait longer than that to move in with my partner because you never really know if you’d last with that person and then, you’re stuck in an awkward living situation if you ever break up.” Doyoung huffs and puffs. 
Your facial expression doesn’t change, remaining completely unamused and blank as you listen to this man aimlessly derail from the main point. “Thanks for that.” Your tongue clicks and sarcasm laces your words. “I told you, didn’t I?”
“You have to be right all the time, don’t you?” He scoffs, annoyed and grows impatient with your lack of reaction. 
“Uh, with you? Most definitely.” You laugh, which Doyoung does not expect. “People are so bored here that they’ll make up the weirdest out of pocket thing about someone else. Us interacting is enough ammo for them to shoot some made up scenario.” 
“How are you so unphased by this?” 
You pack up your lunch boxes into your bag, “because I know none of it is true. I can barely stand you.” Pausing, you turn to face Doyoung fully. Your hand lightly pats his chest and he watches your every movement, the distance between the two of you closing in. “Like you said, let them think what they want.”
Now, it is Doyoung’s turn to remain speechless at the statement. He should really listen to his own advice.
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When you were desperate for a place to live, it did come to your surprise that Doyoung came to your rescue. You two are very distant friends from college, a more accurate title would be acquaintances. Being in the same few clubs made him a familiar figure, but never anyone you personally got close to or spoke much with.
However, there was no harm in networking post-grad. If anything, it became an advantage to come from a big club with so many people aligned in the same field to gain insight into different companies, internships, and  potential job offers. You landed your current adult job with the help of a few connections and chats at career fairs. 
Nonetheless, the offer to move into Doyoung’s apartment was conditional. He had been laid off of his previous work and had to find a new job as soon as he could. Doyoung was able to land the job at your current company through your referral and you were approved to be a co-signer on the lease of the apartment. It felt fated to be and everything fell into its place perfectly, if only you two were compatible. 
The thing with Doyoung is that he always gave off a vibe that he was stuck up and prude. You also had an impression he didn’t like you during college due to you sleeping with his friend, Jaehyun, and breaking his heart when you didn’t want a relationship with him. When you first moved in, you gave Doyoung a lot of leeway but he always treated you coldly. At some point, you had enough of it and decided that he should get a taste of his own attitude. 
Nevertheless, your friendship worked better this way. You’re not entirely sure of the psychology behind it, but Doyoung seemed to communicate with you easier when you were at each other’s throats. All those enemies to lovers tropes you would read growing up were finally making sense to you. 
You two did grow closer when living together, but definitely not to the point where you two were best friends. Doyoung still kept you at arm's reach and so did you. There are a lot of things about him that you didn’t know about, it was quite actually last month that you learned that Doyoung had an older brother. It was only because he had stopped by to drop off some food for him from his mom. 
Doyoung is not the type to warm up to someone quickly, resembling a locked cabinet and a key that is lost somewhere. He is just waiting for the right person to find it. Due to this, you two live very separately at home. Doyoung is quick to rush into his own room and you’re often the one to wander around the living space before finding your way back to yours. 
So on this random weekend, you’re wondering why there is a soft knock at your door. Kicking the blankets off of your body, you rush over to open your closed bedroom door to reveal a messy bed hair Doyoung in his bunny pajama pants. 
“Hey, good….” Doyoung checks the time on his phone to be sure, lifting one eyebrow at your sleepy expression. “Evening.” 
“What do you want?” You groan, ready to let the door hit him in the face. “I get enough of you at work.” You rub your eyes to rid any junk stuck on your lashes. 
“Since your car is in the shop, I was wondering if you needed a ride to run any errands or to grab food. You haven’t left your room the whole day, so you must be hungry.”  His eyes dart left and right, avoiding eye contact as best as he can. Doyoung looks so sheepish, like a deer caught in headlights.
You can’t help, but laugh. “Aw, are you caring for me right now?” 
His face contours into complete disgust. “Not really. I just don’t want to find your dead body in the apartment and potentially get sued for negligence.”
“Well, I’m not hungry.” In that moment, your body couldn’t have had better timing. Your stomach rumbles loudly and Doyoung just blinks at you until it passes. 
You both break out into laughter, “fine, what are you getting for dinner?”
“There’s a new place in town that I’ve been eyeing. A bit upscale, if you’re down.” Doyoung starts walking toward his room, eyebrow raised and waiting for your confirmation. 
“You’re paying.” You close the door before he could protest. You and Doyoung have shared a few meals together, but nothing consistent. It’s not awkwardness that stops the both of you, but that there really isn’t much to chat about over a plate of food. Besides work, you two don’t share any of the same interests or the same circle of friends. 
On top of that, Doyoung would never open up over a sirloin steak. He barely opens up with a bottle of wine. You’ve given up trying to interrogate him with endless questions about his personal life, he never really asks about yours anyways. 
Though, meals with Doyoung aren’t entirely dreadful. His refined palate and hefty paycheck allows for you a delicious culinary experience. You’d never admit it, but eating with him was much better than eating alone.
Dressing for the occasion, you step out in an entirely new and refreshed vibe. Doyoung nearly chokes at the sight of you, not used to seeing you all dolled up and well, nicely dressed. Unintentionally, the accents of your colors match and Doyoung takes note of it, not throwing much of a fit as he usually would. 
“Matching is not a bad thing.” Doyoung clears his throat, hands slipping into his pressed pants and obvious aversion to eye contact.
“Matching with you it might be.” You snicker, but loved your attire too much to change into something else for the night. Both of you head out for dinner and you catch a whiff of something vibrant as Doyoung follows into his car. 
“New cologne?” The strap of the seat belt rustles in the quiet vehicle. Doyoung doesn’t say anything, turning on the engine and pulling out of the parking space with ease.
There is a long moment of silence, at this point you’ve concluded that he probably completely ignored your question. However, after a few blocks, Doyoung follows up with his own inquiry, “you like it?” 
Raising a brow, you’re finding his behavior quite peculiar tonight. It’s a bit unsettling and rather confusing. “I prefer your usual clean scent. This citrus doesn’t match you.”
Without a word of protest, Doyoung grins to himself at your words. Though, you’re too busy scrolling on your phone and participating in the usual silent atmosphere of the car ride.
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“Have you thought of your Halloween costume for the happy hour?” Doyoung delicately cuts into his flank, twirling the piece of meat in the brown gravy that was neatly swirled on the plate.
You shrug, popping the broccolini into your mouth. There hasn’t been much thought about that email since it dropped in your inbox. If anything, you hadn’t even considered the fact that it was already October.  It felt like just yesterday you were on a rooftop bar in the warm summer sunset. 
“Any ideas?” You pat your hands on the cloth napkin on your lap, eyebrow raised toward Doyoung. Not that this man would give you any good ideas, you’re already settling on your last ditch effort costume you always went as during your college years.  
The restaurant is incredibly fancy, way more than you had been anticipating when he had mentioned it being a little upscale. It is moderately loud inside, but nothing above light chatter and the jazz music still audible over the voices. You two had been seated right away, the hostess having starry eyes the moment she saw Doyoung walk in. 
The waiters referred to you with proper titles and offered the wine of the night, placing it in its own separate small table. Anyone could have mistaken you and Doyoung for being a couple on a date, perhaps celebrating an anniversary or a nice date night. 
While at any other occasion you would make it incredibly obvious that isn’t the case, the food is too immaculate for you to care. The tenderness of your meat is melt worthy and the taste of garlic butter hits your palette lovingly. You were too busy indulging in the meal before Doyoung had spoken.
“Maybe something with a mask.” Doyoung responds after a rather long thoughtful silence. 
Your face deadpans, rolling your eyes at how silly it was to even ask him for a serious suggestion. “Ha! So funny.” Your sarcasm bites at his skin.
He flinches slightly at your tone, but places his fork and knife on the white table cloth. He wipes his lips with his napkin, “I’m not saying it to be mean. I meant it as a masquerade.” 
“Why would I wear a mask the whole night in front of our VPs?”
Doyoung shrugs in return, “isn’t the point of Halloween pretending to be someone you’re not? Or trying to hide behind a facade?” 
“That’s too philosophical. Halloween is about tricks, treats and pumpkins.” He laughs at your explanation, bringing the rim of his wine glass to his lips.
“That’s one way to view it.” He unbuttons his cufflinks and rolls his sleeves up to his elbows. Your eyes wander before your mind could remind you it's Doyoung you’re gawking at. “I might go with a mask, like a masked prince of some kind.” 
You laugh, “yeah, I’m sure Daisy will swoon over that.”
Doyoung doesn’t smile, instead he clears his throat uncomfortably. “She has a boyfriend and she’s not going.”
“Aw, I’m sorry to hear that your work crush has been diminished.” You pout, quite insincerely and mockingly. Doyoung scoffs at your statement, rolling his eyes at how he’s willing to entertain this. 
“It was never going to work out anyways. She thought you and I were together.” The statement nearly causes you to choke on your wine. He raises an eyebrow at the slight break in your careless reactions. 
“Wow, it traveled all the way to our receptionist. That’s how you know the whole office practically knows about it.” However, he read it all wrong as you began to speak. Your nonchalant answers bring Doyoung no reassurance as he watches with a quizzical look as you eat your mashed potatoes. 
“Maybe you like the thought of us being together.” Doyoung snickers. He doesn’t mean it, but he did want to shake up the atmosphere to see how playful he can get with you. 
You kick his shin under the table and he lightly jumps, “calm down, prince. Don’t want the commoners to know how much of a narcissist you are.” Narrowing your eyes at him, you grumble. The mashed potato now tasted a bit sour from Doyoung’s jokes. 
“C’mon, seriously? Do you actually think that I’m a narcissist?” Doyoung places a hand on his chest, as if you could be referring to anyone else. He is so dramatic, you think to yourself as you see him tap away a fake tear.
So you decide to be truthful and slightly hurtful, simply because he asked for it. “Yes, I genuinely do at times.” Your powerful tone in your words shocked Doyoung a bit, his head shaking a bit from the actual truth.
“Oh,” He clears his throat awkwardly, halting his playful demeanor. “Fuck, I’m sorry. I really didn’t mean to come off that way.” This is the first time you’ve seen him completely vulnerable in his apology. It is a sharp difference compared to his usual snarky “my bad” or “oops”. 
The hurt on his face is evident, pursing his lips on the rim of his wine glass and the thoughts flooding his heavy head. A part of you feels guilty, wondering if a line had been drawn. 
“Unfortunately, you’re still a likable person as people say.” You clear your throat and shift nervously in your seat. Doyoung looks up through hood eyes at your compliment, but holds back the grin that itches to form on his lips. 
Something about his gaze almost makes you falter, “why did you choose such a fancy place for dinner?” 
“Because I genuinely wanted to see what this place was all about. I’ve been hearing Greg from Finance brag about how he’s eaten here for the past two weekends.” Doyoung lightly taps the table with his index finger, like a habit he couldn’t grow out of.
“You let Greg of all people talk you into a $200 bill?” You can’t hold the laugh back because of how ridiculously easy Doyoung can be swayed by someone else’s opinions. “And what do you think about dinner tonight?
Doyoung may have mistaken the implication in your question — if there even was one. He halts his rhythmic tapping, sitting up to straight out his wrinkled shirt and gazing upon you right in front of him. 
“Dinner was…” The bill lands on the edge of the table and Doyoung flips open the book with one flick. He breaks focus from you for a quick second to look at the final grand number on the thin piece of paper. You barely get a glimpse, as he places his card down and shuts it swiftly. 
His eyes back fully on you, “most definitely worth it.” The smile on Doyoung’s face isn’t menacing or mockery, you’re completely convinced that it’s a smile meant for you. And, you’re unsure how to interpret the butterflies that flutter at the pit of your stomach. 
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As if the day couldn’t get any worse, you walk into work with everyone in some bizarre work appropriate costume and staring at you as if you’re the odd one out. Your costume is in your bag, which Doyoung so graciously let you leave in the trunk of his car before coming in. However, you’re wondering if it's too late to dash back outside to grab it so you fit in with everyone else. 
“Good morning, y/n!” Daisy, a very chirpy and red painted smile, greets you routinely. Cute flower clips line her hair perfectly and the all green attire can only mean one thing: she is a flower. “What’s your costume?”
Laughing nervously, you’re finding a way out of this small talk. “It’s a surprise! You’ll see when we all leave for happy hour tonight.”
“I might be going before then, but please stop by if you have the time to get it on earlier.” She happily smiles, bidding you a small “have a good day!” before returning her focus back to her screen.
The elevator stops on your floor and it’s as if Jack Skellington came overnight and vomited Halloween all over the cubicles. There always has to be that one coworker who is obsessed with the holiday and they lovingly decorated the office before everyone came in. Including yours and Doyoung’s cubicle.
You’re awkwardly shuffling past your coworkers, saying small good mornings and getting weird looks. However, you’re trying very hard to not draw attention to being the only one not dressed up. A tiny baby pumpkin sits in front of your monitor and a neatly wrapped ghost cookie with your name written on a post it note awaits you. 
“Good morning!” Your coworker’s head pops from over the wall and incites a startled scream from you. Of course, she’s laughing giddily at successfully scaring the living out of you. 
“Hey Mariel, good morning. Did you make these?” There is no second guessing who else would be this enthusiastic about Halloween than Mariel is. She talked your ear off the day it hit October 1st about ghouls, goblins, and ghosts.
She even had a spooky countdown calendar of the days until the 31st. On top of that, she was the only one overly excited about the Halloween happy hour the moment the email hit everyone’s inbox.
“Of course. I do a baking side gig, I had to bring in a few spooky friendly treats for everyone in office!” She rests her chin on her palm and squints her eyes at you, “where’s your costume?”
Your palms immediately get sweaty. It’s like disappointing a kid on Christmas by telling them that Santa isn’t real or your mom buying you a nice and modest dress for graduation, but you accidentally stain it. The nervousness to answer creeps up your throat and before you can speak, a voice answers for you.
“Isn’t it classic of y/n to dress up as an office worker?” Doyoung stands up in his cubicle to interject himself in the conversation. 
Mariel nearly loses a lung from how hard she laughs at Doyoung’s corny attempt at a joke. “It’s actually classic of the both of you to not wear your costumes to work.” She adds, wiping the tears from her crinkled eyes. “What’s next? Matching costumes?” 
“Mariel, it’s a surprise.” Doyoung plays it off smoothly.
“Let me guess, Barbie and Ken?” She taps the counter, like a buzzer on a game show to lock in her answer. You’re already shaking your head and Mariel frowns.
Doyoung sighs loudly and dramatically, “I know, Mar. I’d be such a good Barbie, but y/n didn’t want to give that to me.” Oh god, he’s good.
You laugh along, stiffly. “Well, that was the end of our potential matching costumes. We went our separate ways and you’ll see mine later today.” It is enough to get Mariel off of your back about not dressing up at work. Hurrying to settle your things, Doyoung walks around to your side. 
“Did you see how beautiful Daisy looked?” He muses, daydreaming about the whimsical fantasy of the office receptionist. “Must be a lucky guy.”
“She looks like a true flower.” You’re mindlessly unloading your essentials from your work bag and only half listening to Doyoung ramble. “Damn it, I left my coffee in your car.” Throwing your hands up in frustration, you’re already running late for your first meeting of the day with your supervisor. 
Doyoung doesn’t wait a second to push you back into your seat, thinking you could make a quick sprint if he had handed you his keys. “I’ll get it for you. Patricia already asked about your whereabouts.” He smoothly reaches over your shoulder to grab your laptop, the usual scent of his clean cologne brushes your nostrils lightly as the distance between you closes briefly. 
Your heart is pounding in your ears at the proximity, looking up at Doyoung’s long exposed neckline with his collarbones barely peeking out from his linen shirt. Under this dreary fluorescent office lighting, Doyoung looks rather dreamy. 
Nonetheless, you shake off this sudden and weird daydream when he hands you your laptop and makes his merry way to get you your coffee. You’ve got to be losing your mind, the mundane suffocating atmosphere of an office space is causing you to seek any thrills. You’re being delusional. You could never have feelings for Doyoung, of all the people, never Doyoung.
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You come back from your meeting to your coffee neatly placed next to your monitor on a coaster and your bag with your costume in your chair. Silently, you grab your tote and rush off to the bathroom to change before anyone could notice your appearance and sudden disappearance. 
It wasn’t an extravagant costume and it was most definitely not the store bought ones from a pop-up Spirit shop. A black cat has been your go-to DIY last minute costume since college for those rendezvous frat parties or a drunk Halloween night out with your friends. Since it had to be work appropriate, a sexy black cat is out of the picture. 
Smoothing the strands of your hair to adjust the cat ear headband, you give yourself small whiskers with your black eyeliner. “Here’s to Halloween.” A small grumble to yourself, you’re out of the bathroom and briskly walking between cubicles in your slightly form fitting all black attire. 
Your head down and laying low, hoping that Mariel doesn’t notice your costume before you get to your own corner. Making it down the runway, Doyoung’s back is turned and completely working his life away. Somehow, your presence behind him causes a breakaway and he’s spinning around before you could hide back into your cubicle. 
“Thanks, Doyoung.” A small murmur escapes, but Doyoung hears you loud and clear. He doesn’t say anything, instead, his eyes rapidly take in your figure and change of attire. The cat ears on your head cause him to blush, something he didn’t know you could do to him so easily.
“A recurring costume, I’ll admit it’s better than my mask idea.” He gestures, awkwardly clearing his throat at the weird tension that rose from his obvious gawking. 
You’re puzzled, “I can’t recall a time you would’ve seen me like this.” It’s true, you two never spent a Halloween together since you had moved in with him and perhaps, those drunk college nights are too hazy for you to be too sure of yourself.
Doyoung chuckles to himself, peering down at his hands as he delightfully remembers the vivid memory of him catching a glimpse of you for the first time. “Halloween, third year. It was at the NCT yearly ‘Monster Mash’ party. I saw you briefly in the kitchen, looking through the empty bottles of liquor for a drink.”
Then it hits you! That was the night that you had arrived late to the party and almost ditched when there was no more booze left, but you encountered Jaehyun.
“That was so long ago! Wow,” your finger resting on your chin and looking back on the good ole times, “I can’t believe you remembered something like that.” Your voice grows smaller at the end of your sentence, full realization hitting you that Doyoung has known you before you had known him. He kept that memory to himself all these years.
Doyoung, also equally as shocked, feels caught in headlights. Nonetheless, something in his heart wants to open up to you and this feels like an open door opportunity. However, he isn’t sure if he is ready to ruin the dynamic the two of you share. What if he opens more than you’d take? One foot in the door, he can’t imagine this fleeting feeling would come again.
“I couldn’t get you out of my head that night.” He wholeheartedly admits and a heavy tug pulls at your heart. Your jaw drops slightly at his confession and your thoughts are running at godspeed. Doyoung’s heart is pounding in his ears. 
Before you could say anything, Mariel is walking back to her cubicle and is quick to address your costume. You’re half hearing her, mind still stuck on Doyoung’s words and wondering how differently your lives would have been if Doyoung had approached you that night instead of Jaehyun. What could have been? 
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Rustic wooden panels cover the walls of The 127 Bar and Restaurant, giving it that upscale cabin/lodge-feel. Cobwebs lined with plastic spiders and pumpkins with ghoul expressions litter the corners of the counters. Festive Halloween music is muffled by the loud ambiance of chatter. You’re already counting down the hour of when it's socially acceptable for you to leave. 
Coworkers dressed in costumes is a silly concept to you, mainly because you don’t associate anything fun with work and you definitely don’t want to see your coworkers in anything else besides their slacks and button ups. Doyoung, however, beats that exception as he walks in with a black velvet cape and fake blood dribble down his chin. His suit vest is surely something straight out of his own wardrobe and there is way too much hair gel slicked in his hair.
“A vampire fits you much better than a masked prince.” Whether it is meant as an insult or a compliment, Doyoung smiles at your comment. 
“A black cat and a vampire, can we be any more cheery?” Doyoung says sarcastically, earning a small laugh as you look upon your very dark attires for the night.
Shrugging, you lightly pat his shoulder to guide him toward the VPs. “We all can’t be Daisy. She takes the cake for having optimism in this cruel corporate world. Now, let’s go get our attendance points so we can leave earlier.”
“A black cat mind reader? That elevates your costume a bit.” Doyoung smirks, leading the way to a doomful 15 minute conversation with important people. 
Doyoung surprises you by how social he can get. You two normally attend the usual happy hours that your coworkers like to have after work, but that is mostly among a few that sit on your floor. This mixer included every department and Doyoung jumps conversation to the next with ease and speed, you could hardly keep up.
“Okay, social butterfly. I haven’t heard you talk so much since college club meetings.” Raising an eyebrow, you’re stopping Doyoung from approaching another coworker dressed as a skeleton. 
“I haven’t seen you this quiet in a while. What’s wrong? Cat’s got your tongue?” He blinks at you with a dull expression.
Suddenly, you’re feeling self-conscious at how he noticed your silence. “Corporate happy hours aren’t my thing. I don’t particularly have interests with any of these people.” 
Doyoung purses his lips, “yet you seem to talk endlessly with me and we have nothing in common.” 
Clearing your throat, you’re unsure of this strange feeling in your chest. You and Doyoung have commonality in background – school, clubs, mutuals, profession – but interests seem to be way far out of scope for the two of you. While the few dinners you two would share are rather silent, it doesn’t eat you alive the same way corporate social events do. Despite the forced close proximity, you don’t know if you and Doyoung would actually be friends with each other. 
“Right, but it’s different for us.” Trying to save the sinking ship seems harder to do as you rack your brain for an argument. 
Doyoung tilts his head slightly, “different? How is it different?” In that moment, there is a shift in his demeanor as he tucks his hands into his pants pockets and leans back slightly on his heels. A hooded stare, eyebrow raised, and a smug smirk waits to hear how your relationship with Kim Doyoung is so different compared to your other coworkers. 
Feeling small under his gaze, you’re wondering why a heat travels across your cheeks. The Halloween music and robust atmosphere are completely tuned out at this point. “We have common things to talk about besides work, like mutuals! I don’t know– you just get me. Lately, I feel like you’ve been opening up a bit more.”
Doyoung nearly beams hearing the last part of your ramble because he feels exactly the same. You just get him, despite always being at each other’s throats. He knows that this banter would not work with anyone else, it had to be you.
It’s like with each interaction, you get closer to the key in unlocking everything about him. Without your knowledge, he so badly wishes you to be the one to find it. 
“Hey you two!” Greg from Finance wraps his arms around Doyoung’s shoulders, appearing rather abruptly and startling the both of you. “How was your date at Bodega 127?” 
Your eyeballs nearly fall out of your socket at the word date being thrown carelessly when referring to you and Doyoung. Doyoung reacts quite nervously and is shocked as well at the odd choice of wording Greg decided to use. 
“I wouldn’t call it a date...” Doyoung chuckles, exchanging anxious glances with you. 
“Yeah, we’re not together.” You jump in with Doyoung at denying such a bold accusation. 
“Oh, come on! There’s no need to feel embarrassed. The whole office knows already, what’s the point in trying to hide it?” Greg continues to poke the bear. 
“I can see how it might come off that way, but Doyoung and I aren’t into each other like that.” Your eyes bounce between a skittish Doyoung and an overly-pushy Greg. “Right, Doyoung, you don’t like me that way?” You’re begging him with your stare, but for some reason, Doyoung hesitates long enough for you to notice.
“Uh yeah. We’re just coworkers.” He averts making eye contact with you and you’re thrown off your tracks at how off-putting he is being. You’re trying to hold back the confusion from showing on your face, but Greg takes the bait.
“Okay, I’ll stop berating you two about your relationship. But when Doyoung told me he brought you there, I will say I thought it was for a date night y’all were having. It’s that type of restaurant experience, y’know?” Greg lightly pats Doyoung on the back before walking off to chat with another group of coworkers. 
You’re standing still next to Doyoung and wondering why the fuck he hesitated when you asked him such an easy question. He doesn’t look your way, gaze remains glued to the floor.
“I think we should leave now.” He says, dashing toward Patricia to let her know of your exits. A sigh escapes your body, completely confused and lost at every feeling roaming in your chest.
The drive back home is completely silent. The elephant in the room becomes bigger at every stoplight. Most of the trip is you staring out the window, trying to process the last few scenes at the happy hour. Doyoung remains focused on the drive, so much that he forgets to put music on to distract from the stiffness in the air. 
When you two finally make it back up to the apartment, you’re the first to break the awkward silence. “Hey, uh– thanks for driving me around these past few days. The car shop told me that my car is ready tomorrow, so I won’t need to carpool with you anymore.”
He nods, despite the long sinking feeling of his heart reaching the bottom of his stomach. He has had so much fun with you lately being around him, he isn’t sure if he’s ready to go back to how things were — living so separately in the same place.
“Sorry about Greg.” Doyoung rubs the back of his neck, “I didn’t know he would say something like that.” He gently wipes off the dried fake blood on his chin.
“We’re used to it, right?” The airy, lightness in your tone puzzles Doyoung. “At least he was courageous enough to actually address it to our faces instead of contributing to the gossip in the office.” 
“He’s just a big idiot.” Doyoung unties his cape and tosses it over the couch. “I shouldn’t have told him we went together.”
It somewhat offended you, “what? You don’t want to be seen with me or something?” You toss your headband onto the dining room table, fixing your hair back to its normal state.
However, Doyoung perks up at the evident tone in your voice and the scorn in your expression. “It’s not that.” 
“You know, Doyoung, you have been really confusing lately.” There is a pause before you continue, wondering how you should word this without sounding so rash.
“First, you’re knocking on my door and asking me to dinner. Then, you’re getting me my coffee from the car. And, you hesitated back there when I said you didn’t like me and our conversations recently have been different, so open ended.” 
Doyoung leans against the couch, arms crossed and  intently listening to your speech. “Are you implying that I have feelings for you?”
He sounds so snarky that it causes your skin to crawl, frustration fuels your soul at how delusional he is making you seem. “I’m just stating the facts.” 
Doyoung scoffs, arms falling back to his sides. A minute passes, but it feels nearly like forever given the silence in the room and how his eyes are glued to the ground, full of contemplation. However, not just any careless amount of contemplation, but real and genuine assessment on how he has felt over the past two weeks with you.
He opens his mouth to speak, but falls short of formulating a coherent sentence and feels a bit choked up and confused by himself. Though, you’ve been standing there and waiting for him and the silence has made you incredibly uncomfortable. “It’s a reach. There’s no possible way for you to harbor any feelings for me. We made that really clear to each other.” 
You’re turning to hide back into your room, but Doyoung quickly stands at your door frame, alert and before you. “It’s not entirely a reach….” He mumbles, “I can’t say confidently that I have true and full romantic feelings toward you, but I have been seeing you in a romantic light.” 
“I don’t fully understand what you mean.” Your eyebrows knit together, finding that his speech sounds too much like a riddle. 
He takes a deep breath in, exhaling to calm the waking nerves in his throat. “I’m beginning to understand that some of what I feel towards you is romantic, like I don’t want to stop being around you or I want to go out of my way to do things that make your life easier.” He smirks coyly to himself, breaking the intense exchange of dialogue between the both of you briefly, “I’m an acts of service kind of guy.” 
“Look, I’m saying that yes, I think I’m starting to have feelings for you. It wasn’t until recently did I feel like we’ve really gotten to spend time together after you’ve moved in.” His shoulders drop, “and I don’t know, I just– like you said, you just get me.”
This moment between the both of you is so real. There are no gimmicks, no foul play, no teasing and banter. Doyoung means every word he is saying. While a part of you wants to joke around and say something snarky, the other part of you feels serious and rather shocked at this confession.
Never in your mind did the potential of Doyung catering feelings toward you exist. And now, even more than ever, you’re actually reflecting on your own thoughts toward him. Doyoung is the first person you want to go to in a crowded room, it’s like you’re searching for him without realizing it. He’s the one you want to rely on, knowing how capable and responsible he is. Doyoung, given the chance, can really brighten up the room. 
If there was anyone in this world he chose to open up to, you wanted it to be you. 
“Can I kiss you?” Doyoung almost stopped himself from saying it, but he had to know. Your eyes are beyond huge at his request, the sound of thumping in your chest growing in your ears.
“What?” You croak, taken aback by this random out-of-character question. Doyoung’s cheeks are as bright red as a tomato, but he doesn’t break his intense eye contact. 
“Kiss me, I want to know if my feelings are real.” He steps a bit closer with lips parted slightly, rosy cheeks, and dilated pupils. Your shaky hands slowly reach to cup his face and there the beating of your heart quickens, fast enough to where you think you could faint. 
“If we kiss and neither of us feel anything, we’ll pretend it never happened.” You’re trying to cushion any chance at rejection, so that it wouldn’t end in complete disappointment from either one of you. It’s to soften the blow. 
Nevertheless, Doyoung nods in your hot hands and brings your chin close with the pull of his finger. Your lips pucker and land gently on his, your eyes still wide open and you’re in utter shock that Kim Doyoung, the man you thought you’d never kiss, is now kissing you. 
It’s as if fuel added to a flame, the fire in your stomach grows violently at this connection. Doyoung swears he could feel a sudden spark in his tight chest, electricity running in veins.
He pulls away and the contact between you two breaks as quick as it connected. He simply blinks at you, with a cute doe-eyed expression and red cheeks. You’re blinking back, heart in your throat and a desire to kiss him again. 
“Are your feelings real?” You ask him a question you’re scared to know the answer to, worried that he didn’t feel that same fire as you did from that kiss and he’d ask to pretend it never happened.
“Real, absolutely real.” Doyoung confirms with a breathy speech. He can’t pinpoint how long these feelings have been locked away and how long he has ignored them. Nonetheless, that kiss proves so much to himself, one being that he is way more head over heels for you than he thought. 
And the next course of action he chooses may ruin your current dynamic completely, but he fully and utterly wants to commit to you. He doesn’t tell you, worried that it may scare you off when he only wishes to hold you close.
The two of you stare into each other’s eyes for a brief moment of silence with tensions high and hearts beating fast. Both are unaware of how to proceed without making things awkward or shifting too greatly from your banterful friendship. 
So, Doyoung eases in with a request so telling, but gentle enough for the two of you to agree upon. “Let me drive you to work from now on.” 
Your eyes glimmer with a shine, clearing your throat before you speak. “Is this about our carbon footprint or something else?”
He chuckles, “we’re saving the Earth while I also get to spend more time getting to know you, it sounds like a win - win situation to me.” 
“And the rumors?” 
Doyoung leans down to whisper gently into your ear, “let them think what they want.” The same shivers that ran through your body before had returned, but accompanied with butterflies dancing lovingly in your stomach.
Strange how two weeks ago, you thought that the possibility of romantically being with Doyoung was close to none and the best way to describe the two of you was that you just coexisted together. But, here you two are: standing in the middle of your shared living room with sparkling eyes for each other and a newfound excitement for a new relationship, more than just coexisting.
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luvyeni · 1 year
Text
—{🎂}BLOWJOBS; W/ NCT 127
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pairings. boyfriend!nct127 x fem!reader
wc. 1.3k+
warnings. oral (m. receiving) , facials , cum eating
authors note. remember i write mark and haechan with dream
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—{🍰}... TAEYONG ⋮ at the studio !
your boyfriend always gets so stressed when he's in the studio , luckily you're there to relieve him of that stress.
"i'll be back in a few , and then we can finish." the producer got up , leaving the room. as soon as the door closed , you were on your knees , unbuttoning his pants. "let me take the edge off." he groaned , lifting his hip , letting you pull his pants and underwear down. "fuck , baby put it in your mouth." he groaned. you took him into your mouth , he sighed knocking his head back. "fuck baby just like that." his moans were whiny and airy as you bobbed your head up and down on his cock. "fuck baby , hurry up before they come back." you took him all the way down your throat , gagging around his cock. "sh..shit baby , -fuck- im cumming, ngh! " he filled up your mouth with his cum , griping the chair so hard his knuckles were white.
"fu..fuck baby i feel so much better."
—{🍰}... TAEIL ⋮ waking him up !
he often woke you up with oral , knowing it made your day much better. so you one day you decide to return the favor.
you woke up earlier than he did , so he wouldn't have a chance to get up before you did. shimmying up the the covers , pulling his pants down his morning wood standing tall , precum forming at the tip making your mouth water. you licked his tip , his thighs twitched, you smirked , lowering your mouth on him , he groaned , still sleeping. you stroked off what you couldn't fit into your mouth. taeil's eyes fluttered open , the feeling of your mouth on his cock had stuttering. "o..oh fuck , fuck baby your mouth feels so good." he whimpered, trying not to thrust up into your mouth , the blanket now on the floor , the full few of your mouth on his cock , finally waking up. "oh shit babe , im gonna cum." his head thrashed against the pillow as he came , you sucked on his tip , finally taking him out of your mouth.
"fuck princess , thank you for waking me like that."
—{🍰}... JOHNNY ⋮ in the kitchen !
you're just an insatiable girlfriend with a oral fixation who wants your boyfriend all the time , even if that means blowing him in the kitchen with his friends right there.
johnny felt you following behind him into the kitchen , turning around to face you , you immediately getting on your knees , pulling at his pants. "whoa baby , what are you doing , the guys" you pouted , looking up at him. "please , i need you in my mouth." your eyes were glazed over as you pawed at his clothed cock. "o..oh fuck , okay." you moved quickly , unbuckling his pants , pulling them down with his underwear , his cock springing out. he groaned , biting his fist as you took him into your mouth , his cock heavy on his tongue, humming in satisfaction. "sh..shit baby , so desperate to have something in your mouth." he whispered , you bobbed your head up and down , swallowing around his cock , he gripped the counter. "oh shit baby im gonna cum." he groaned. "ngh fuck." his cum flooded your mouth , he pulled out some getting on your lip , he brushed his thumb across your lip , sticking it back into your mouth , you smiled finally satisfied.
"fuck you're so nasty baby."
—{🍰}... YUTA ⋮ before a show !
he calls it his warm up , pulling you into a random room , shoving his pants down , telling you to get on your knees.
"yuta , you have like 10 minutes before you have to go on stage." you said as he pulled you into empty closet , pulling his pants down. "that's fine baby , i can destroy your throat in 10 minutes , get on your knees." he pulled his cock out , grabbing it , slapping it against your lips. "come on open your mouth baby." he stroked his cock , you opened your mouth and he shoved himself inside your mouth, pushing you all the way down on his cock , before thrusting inside your mouth. "fu..fuck baby , take my cock." he groaned , taking all your hair gathering it into a ponytail , holding your head still as he used your mouth , gagging around his cock. "fuck , su..such a slut , letting me use your mouth like this , fuck im gonna cum." he pushed your head all the way down , cumming. "shit." he pulled out of your mouth , you cough, spit and cum covering your lips.
"poor baby , your face is such a mess , they're definitely gonna know what we were doing."
—{🍰}... DOYOUNG ⋮ while he's on the phone !
sometimes you just like being a brat , and to get under his skin , catching him while he's on the phone is a sure way to piss him off.
you were literally in the the position , ready to take him into your mouth , when his stupid phone rang. "don't answer." you whined , kitty licking his tip. "sh..shit , i have to , it's my manager , just stop for a minute." you scoffed as he answered. you being the brat you were, you weren't gonna stop , kitty licking his tip once more taking his tip into your mouth sucking on it, he bit his lip , glaring down at you while he tried to listen to whatever his manager was talking about. you slowly sink down on him , he throws his head back as you bob your head up and down , the playfulness evident in your eyes pissing him off. "hy..hyung, i understand, i have to go now." he hung up , throwing his phone , grabbing your hair , pushing you all the way down , you gagged around his length.
"i was gonna be nice and let you go at your own pace , now im gonna use your mouth like the slut you are."
—{🍰}... JAEHYUN ⋮ in the shower !
surprising your boyfriend in the shower with a blowjob is a sure way to fucked hard every single time.
you pushed the door open , startling your boyfriend. "baby , what are you doing?" he smirked as you climbed into the shower , sinking down to your knees , looking up at him through your wet lashes. "fuck baby , you want me in your mouth?" you nodded , grabbed his cock , stroking it until he got hard. "please." you kissed his tip. "fuck no teasing." he hissed , and you took him all the way , gagging around his length. "fuck , your mouth feels heavenly baby." his licked his lips , moving his hips. "sh..shit , gonna cum on that pretty face." he groaned. "shit , baby girl gonna cum." he pulled out of your mouth , jerking his cock off until he came on your face with a string of curse words. "so fucking sexy." he pulled you up , pushing you up against the shower wall.
"gotta reward my pretty girl for taking my cock down her pretty throat like that."
—{🍰}... JUNGWOO ⋮ during a live !
you like catching him off gaurd , knowing that he'll have a hard time trying to conceal his moans , while trying to talk to fans.
you knew he was live , but that didn't stop you from getting on your knees , crawling under the desk , pushing his legs open , scooting in between his legs. his eyes looking down for a second , your eyes were low as you pulled his pants down to his ankles. "i'm sorry , im a bit distracted." his breathing hitched as you kissed his tip. "i..i'm sorry , i..i hit my toe." he swallowed hard as you licked up the base of his cock , taking him into your mouth. you scratched his sensitive thighs , a low groan coming from his mouth , his cock twitch , he was gonna cum. "o..oh my- i have to go , i love you guys." he waved , turning the camera off. "sh..shit baby , baby im gonna cum." he thrusted up into your mouth. "i'm cumming!" his eyes squeezed shut as he came into your mouth , catching his breath , you kissed his thighs , he whined.
"baby , they probably know something was going on."
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©️LUVYENI
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