#not mad I just desperately need to know

[smoozie]

i can never say this off anon but. like. i don't agree with rpf ideologically but there's something to the narrative of it, right? like if i was a minecraft youtuber and so was my best friend and i fell in love with them i would never fucking say anything publicly. there's a story there. i just wish it made sense to write about fictional youtubers or write aus about my ocs as youtubers without it turning into meta commentary on actual RPF. why is there no respectful way to write about c!cc!characters huh

There is most definitely a story to be told in which the entire world thinks two people should be together, and because of that two people cannot reveal they are in love with each other.

#anon this is an interesting topic #so cruel of u to put it in my inbox tho lmao /lh #now I have to say smth off anon abt it! #but uh I'm trying to phrase this ever so delicately #I don't think u should ship real ppl #obviously #I grew up watching dan and phil guys #but this ask is soooo like #yeah #them #I think abt them a lot and how hard it must have been to be in the closet and somehow outted at the same time #very interesting perspective #but also it is so intrusive to explore smth like that ya know? #like in a fanfic #and ur right any story revolving around this topic is ultimately a commentary on rpf culture #even if 'youtuber who is in love with youtuber friend“ could be a fun story #it will always draw uncomfortable parallels to actual ppl #smooziespeaks #ask #anon #dragonanswers #also u mentioned mcyt's specifically which is funny cuz my response is basically #ah yes my favorite mcyts dan and phil #ALSO! What drove you to ask me of all ppl abt this??? #not mad I just desperately need to know #what abt me screams send ur anonymous confessions #I need to exude that energy everywheew

[cerise-on-top]

Hank, Sanford and Deimos with a Reader who does Handcrafts

Gonna post my old MadCom stuff since people seem interested in it! I didn't write too much back then, but I'll post it anyway and hope for some MadCom requests as well! What the title says! Reader knits, crochets and embroiders in this! The format is different from how I usually write, but that's because I wrote this months ago, if not in 2022! I don't remember when, but it's been a while since I wrote this!

Hank

If you get his attention while doing one of your crafts, expect him to just stare at you for a while. He knows what knitting is, since you can use those needles to stab someone with enough force, but he never really cared much for any of it. So, seeing you do those small, but precise movements has him somewhat curious. If you beckon him closer to check out what you’re doing, he will approach you, taking your piece from your hands and gently examining it, before returning it to you.

While he won’t join you that often due to his occupation, Hank will lie down next to you from time to time, watching you work until he falls asleep eventually. Doing so next to you, especially when you’re knitting or doing embroidery, takes a lot of trust on his behalf, so it’s a rather rare occurrence, but it might happen. Still, sometimes even Nevada’s most wanted can’t resist getting some sleep in.

If you give him a scarf or anything of the likes it might seem like he doesn’t like it at first. As he only grunts in acknowledgement and doesn’t wear it, it might seem disheartening at first glance. But rest assured, he’s well aware that him wearing it would only get it covered in blood, and he wouldn’t want your creation, that you put so much love into, to get sullied like that. Hank does keep it somewhere hidden where only he can find it so that it won’t get stolen as well, he truly does treasure anything you give him.

Sanford

He has helped his mother crocheting every once in a while when he was young by holding her wool for her. Sanford always thought it to be really cool how you can make something so beautiful out of something as simple as wool and yarn. Much like he did when he was younger, he’ll hold your yarn for you, making it more comfortable to knit or crochet for you. Unlike Hank and Deimos, he will try to learn it as well. It seems relaxing, so why not? But by no means is he a master. Due to his strength, he will likely rip the yarn and wool apart from time to time and come to you for help.

In order to relax and unwind a bit, he’ll likely come to you and ask if you would like to practise your craft for and with him. Having you around in and of itself already makes Sanford happy, but just getting to spend time with you without having to worry about being killed by the enemy makes it all the better. If you let him, he will hold you close, lean into you, put you on his lap, anything you’re comfortable with.

Please give him a sweater. Because he’s never wearing a shirt he gets cold fairly easily. He’ll cherish it dearly and wear it whenever he can, and whenever he knows it won’t get ripped. Another thing he’d be very happy with would be a piece of embroidery. It reminds him of better times and gives him hope, especially when your piece of art is something pleasant and sweet to look at. Because of that, he will put it up somewhere in his room where he can always see it. Even if Deimos makes fun of him for it, he will simply lightly jab at the smoker, all the while smiling at it.

Deimos

He’ll lovingly call you a grandma for having hobbies like these. Even while doing embroidery, where you stab things thousands of times, he will snicker at you whenever he catches you doing any of these things. Though, he doesn’t mind that sort of thing at all since that means you’ll be sitting still for a while, meaning you’ll give him a chance to unwind with him. Deimos will wrap his arms around you, leaning onto you or just cuddle into you in general. No fighting, no getting hurt, just watching you do the same movements over and over again.

Despite possibly calling you boring, he does have great respect for your craft, since he can’t do any of it. It’s too tedious and he can’t sit around for long enough doing something like this. It’s simply not exciting enough. But the moment you give him his first sweater, he will think it’s the most awesome thing to ever exist. Proud as a peacock, he will flaunt and taunt his new piece of clothing, especially to Sanford and Hank, declaring just what a great lover he has.

Present him with a plushie and his mind will be blown. He always thought knitting and crocheting are just for woolly hats and sweaters and scarves and all. If he sees you made him a tiny grunt, he will simply lose it, run around the Status Quo base and show everyone what you’re capable of. It doesn’t even matter to him whether or not it looks good. Your hands are magical to him and absolutely everyone has to know just how cool and epic you are.

#madness combat #madness combat x reader #hank j wimbleton x reader #sanford x reader #deimos x reader #I miss Madness Combat so much y'all have absolutely no idea #I am foaming at the mouth absolutely feral waiting for episode 12 #I desperately need these funny grunt creatures back in my life #I know I said I'd be playing the OG MW games this weekend but in lieu of me getting back into madcom I might replay M:PN #and rewatch the entire series! I could force my friend to watch it with me again! #it'd be the third time I'd be watching it with someone else #I actually talked nonstop for over an hour about Madness Combat to my ex at one point and he didn't even stop me #I had so many theories about it all that seemed to make sense to me but I since forgot them unfortunately #Also did anyone else see the 2B plushies or was I hallucinating those? Because I can't find them on Makeship... #I actually own the Hank Sanford and Deimos plushies #Only 2B is missing at this point and I want him so so bad I love him #I actually had a White Hank plushie custom made as well because she's my absolutel favorite #oh boy I've been rambling here but it shows just how much I love Madness Combat! Such a good show! Phenomenal music too! #I need to give Sanford a hug after all he's been through :(

[bl-inded]

The most heartbreaking part about the MohkDay break up, is that once again Mohk is all alone. And this time, he didn't make that choice. He wanted to stay, he wanted Day to be by his side. And he was still left alone

After Rung especially, we know that our boy has severe abandonment issues. And even though we can't be certain her death was preventable by him picking up the call, he blames himself for it. The fact that Day and Mohk have only ever spoken about Rung in surface-level conversations (hell I don't think they really ever spoke about Mohk a lot at all), it hurts sooo much more that Day broke up with him after Mohk laid his heart out in front of the whole family.

I saw a bunch of people talking about how Day refuses to do any emotional labour, and I see where they're coming from. But, i gotta disagree. He did not break up with Mohk because of his trauma. He broke up with Mohk because Mohk was willfully destroying his life to stay with Day. I don't want to say his heart was in the right place, but it was in the right area code at least. I genuinely believe that the "you also pity me" was an excuse because he didn't want to hold Mohk back. I want to believe that he didn't have the time to understand the implications of what Mohk meant when he talked about Rung and he regretted it later.

(I will live in that lie till I'm told otherwise)

But Mohk has never been a fighter for himself. He'll fight in a heartbeat for what Day or Porjai need. He'll put himself in harm's way to protect those he love. But the moment he has to fight for himself, he'll back out. I don't know if this is a post-ep1 flashback thing, but that is what the show has established for us. And so as gut wrenching as his "if that's what you want" is, it's very in character for him.

But just to be clear, now that I've been a rational adult about this analysis of this show and characters. FUCK ALL OF THIS. Like straight up wtf? Who asked for an ep11 conflict huh? Who? P'Aof?? I love you, but WHYYY. My absolute green flag of a man does not deserve this nonsense after everything he's done. So FIX THIS RIGHT NOW.

#last twilight #Istg I thought Night will go out after Mohk #but that's just my desperate need for someone to comfort him I guess #if Porjai doesn't tear Day a new one imma fuckin lose it #you know damn well my girl ain't gonna just sit and let this fly #problem is mohk probably won't tell her the full story and withdraw completely again #i'm so mad #i usually try not to think about the show as a structure but this is such a shoehorned ep11 conflict #if they wanted to to do the mohk doesnt take care of himself storyline they should have started it at least in ep8 #sigh #gmmtv #thai bl #bl rants #jimmysea #p'aof #mohkday #mohk #day #last twlight the series #thai bl meta

[kirkwallguy]

my most evil inquisitor lore is that my trevelyan has a sister who died in the kirkwall circle just before the chantry explosion and cullen had a massive crush on her. she looked just like her. many implications.

#she was caught trying to escape and had to be made tranquil #cullen signed the papers but he warned her ahead of time which gave her a chance to. well you know. #and that was his tipping point turning him against meredith's rule. #he DOESN'T know she was a trevelyan though bc her parents were so ashamed of having a mage child they made her change her name #and he just doesnt make the connection between two blonde girls. he just thinks he has a type. #until. on THE wedding day. hawke is invited (because my trev has a crush on him. and is desperately mad of his tall blonde wife who she saw #when she snuck a glance at his locket one time. she lied about reading tale of the champion.) #anyway bethany sees her and is like. wait. she looks exactly like this woman i was in love with in the circle. #and she puts the pieces together. realises shes marrying CULLEN of all people. and is like oh fuck. #and she like. warns her. but at that point what can you do? the wedding is arranged and trevelyan is a massive public figure #so she walks down the aisle towards a man who is a) possibly only into her because he's chasing the ghost of her dead sister b) possibly the #reason her sister is dead c) actually kind of evil now that she's hearing stories about him from bethany #sorry the dai romances are boring to me i need to inject toxicity and horror into them to be interested. #anyway. all this to say that cullen kisses mary on the forehead when she reaches him at the altar and everyone who Knows (several people #by this point. dorian was there as well so he's been whispering) goes dead silent

[suffarustuffaru]

ngl emilia needs to go more batshit more. i support her rights AND wrongs. i think she should match her boyfriend and go insane for an eight arcs straight. tappei stop holding her back 🥺🥺

#i mean this /hj #only half joking. i think she should go a little insane!!! match ur bf!!! #rezero #emilia #i mean this all affectionately of course akdnnd emilia is a favorite of mine <33 i just wanna *squeezes her like a chew toy* #we got a taste of this in arc 4 and her being mad and upset in arc 3 but i think there should be MORE…. #also i know the ifs exist…. but i want main route content… shes in desperate need of more Big development fr

[jahiera]

I kind of want to just restart emrys so I can play her again more perfectly this time... kill even MORE fiends and such. but also I speedran grymforge a bit & the thing is that. emrys rolls up to moonrise towers already have a deep-seated and intense paladin-specific beef with ketheric. babygirl heard that he was 1. an evil paladin 2. broke his paladin vow to TWO gods prior 3. was like That and decided Actually, I'm going to project All of my own personal issues and insecurities onto you. And then I'm going to kill you. and then she still offered to spare him. so I need the buildup to that from grymforge. you see.

#you understand. #one thing that emrys will do is have extremeeeely specific problems in regards to needing to be the Best Paladin In The Room #<- she is abnormal. she has a lot of problems. #Ketheric is such a ... dark twisted mirror / I can see myself in you / I do not /want/ to see myself in you. #of course she resents his crimes but more than that she resents what she Sees in him that she feels is also in her self #there's something ugly in you thats also in me etc etc #so. this beef NEEDS BUILDUP. #(alternatively: she latched onto Dame Aylin almost immediately as a figure of holy righteousness and divinity that she craves for herself) #(if Ketheric is close to what she COULD be at her worst; Dame Aylin is suuch a. Being You Could Fix Me. moment for her) #(also objectively not normal but very funny. ah yes I know what will make me a better object and sword for Tyr. if I was nothing but a #channel for divine righteousness greater than myself. not even a person just a violent weapon made to STRIKE.) #(and she can never be so close to the divine + never be such a weapon but she sure does TRY.) #(OF WHICH dame aylin is not either; but she IS a blinding light in the dark & Ough. the complexes that inspires.) #Anyways.... the NPCs we latch onto as the narrative parallel / reference for our Tav PC huh. Yeah! #act 2 is just... it gave me SOOOO much for her. Shadowheart/Ketheric/Aylin in different measures for different reasons #Orin. she's weird about but for different reasons. In that orin's fanaticism and madness kind of #tickles a part of her that wants. very desperately. to smite down the most obvious of evils in 1v1 combat #which is a violence that once again! comes uncomfortably close to the fanaticism of Ketheric + Orin + their own propensity for god-driven #violence & horror. as it is and such.

[thenookspace]

Girl help I'm having aroace Miguel O'Hara thots

#fuck what if he wanted a daughter and the companionship of other spiders (initially) bc he was desperate for non-sexual and non-romantic #affection/connection??? #man so desperate for familial love that he made the spider society AND dimension-hopped #makes me wonder how the dead Miguel had Gabriella #cloning??? assuming the dude was going by the comics backstory and was a geneticist #maybe Miguel in ATSV wasn't a geneticist????? no test tube baby for him I guess #does this stem from my need for more complex ace rep? Probably??????? #where's that post with the “I need more passionate aces - aces who get fucking mad” #bc THAT'S HIM OFFICER #Miguel O'Hara the angriest aro ace in the business #the thots are thinking #because y'all KNOW he wouldn't have trouble making a baby the conventional way I've seen those fanarts the PTA mums would be all over that #even his fucking AI was falling in love with him in the comics #so why the fuck did he need to hop dimensions to have a family????? #mmmmmmm sex and romance repulsed motherfucker coding detected #this is in no way a jab at anyone else's hornyness for him tho #character.ai away my dudes #honestly the art and writing coming out bc of sheer thirst for this man is incredible to me #I just want an ace character I could go to anger management class with #bc I'm over here existing in a perpetual state of annoyed at the only ace rep being robots/aliens/emotionless #bc all that is the fucking coolest and all but eeeeeeeh #gimme an ace who could foreground familial relationships and friendships and show me how devastating they are when broken #rather than act like passion and love and emotions are unavailable to people without romance and sex #gimme an ace character who is emotional and worldly and irreparably fucked up #gimme ace Miguel O Hara #ATSV #spiderman across the spiderverse #spiderverse spoilers #atsv spoilers #atsv miguel

[swear2g-d]

why is talking about your feelings so scary. i've been so good about not bottling things up and communicating clearly but it's still absolutely terrifying when i have to do it with a friend 😭

#i just want to have a healthy discussion about our friendship and i can't do it #i've written and deleted and rewritten this message like ten times #what if they get mad at me #they wouldn't i know they wouldn't but what if they do #it's a conversation that desperately needs to happen but i can't do it 😭😭 #would it be weird to email them instead of texting #that feels less scary but also more formal and i don't want them to think i'm mad at them or anything!!! i just need to talk!!

[ao3screenshotss]

jjk chapter 236 spoilers!!

LOOKING FOR A FANART!!

ok so i swear i saw a jjk fanart today of inumaki yelling ‘connect’ at gojo after he got sliced and then the second panel was something like ‘thanks toge’ and gojo with stitches on his stomach where he got sliced in half - there might have been more stuff i don’t really remember

BUT I CANT FIND IT

i don’t know if it was on twitter or tiktok or something but i cannot find it for the life of me and i’m going crazy looking for it

so if anyone knows it and has a link PLEASE send it to me i would be so grateful

but even if you don’t, if you've seen it please tell me if it exists so i don't think i'm imagining things!!

#i’ve been looking and i can’t find it and i’m so so mad #jjk #PLEASE 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏 #i was gonna say i’m more desperate to find this than i am for gojo to live but then i realised that was a lie #I JUST NEED TO KNOW IT EXISTS #i think it’s on twitter but i’m not 100% certain #me :) #currently very desperate

[mewharley]

I really want to see Crowley and Aziraphale talk/argue/complain about the kiss haha

To acknowledge that Crowley basically was kissing Aziraphale's chin instead of his lips

Complain that Crowley maybe couldn't see or he was just that desperate and wasn't about to break the kiss just to try again to find Aziraphale's lips, that would have been awkward haha

#Good Omens #like #I'm so mad at you and need you to listen and stay #oh shit can stay still let me try again to kiss you #ok now i have your lips let try again more desperate #hahaha #like oh excuse me I know just kissed you in a desperate and forceful way but can you give me a sec so i can position my lips correctly #cool thanks let me shove my face against yours once again #ignore last try that didn't count #i need this on a fic #bonus points if they're actually mad at each other or in a serious situation but all they're doing is arguing about the kiss hahaha #they're a pair of dumbasses ok that's the best part #a sarcastic crowley and a petty Aziraphale please and thank you #ineffable husbands

[soldier-poet-king]

Oh noooooo my father, the bootlicker, is whining and complaining about how Trudeau's govt has significantly reduced military spending and the size of the Canadian forces and military infrastructure, oh noOoOO whatever will we do by not copying our southern neighbour's military spending habits and instead indicating our commitment to diplomatic and peaceful solutions globally by reducing our military and redirecting spending to better purposes

#franposting #politics sorry not sorry #EAT SHIT AND DIE im so mad #im gonna scream #RADICAL NON VIOLENCE ONLY #like im not saying no defense #but my father thinks we need to be way more militarily aggressive #and im like. eat shit. #swords to ploughshares #rather die for nothing than to kill just for your country #anyway. im so mad #my father is ok and then somtimes he opens his mouth and im like RAGE RAGE KILL KILL #Anyway. every day i regret giving up booze for lent #bc i have to sit thru extended family dinner saturday nights #COMPLETELY SOBER #ya bitch is DESPERATE for a small glass of red #just a lil. im Mediterranean. i need a glass of red with big weekend dinnera #dgmw i don't Like trudeau. but hes better than the PCs. devil u know and whatever #truly im more ndp gal but yknow. minority parties and all that

[selfinflictedgunshotwound]

imo everyone on earth should be talking about Him (don't want this showing up in the tag even though it's not a diss) but everytime i go to the tag and there's only like 3 new posts i'm like. oh yeah almost no one cares except me and like 5 other ppl on here

i ran out of tags KFHSJENNXN i don't think that's literally ever happened to me before anyways don't read them because it's just me being insane as per usual

#most of his indirects on twitter are from people in diff asian countries as well and ik he's doing an asia tour soon(?) #bruh he's never coming back to the usa is he 😭😭😭 i need him in chicago i miss him so bad #i feel very ugly emotionally rn still bc i was reading all of the rando ass dating rumors of him last night LMAO and it pissed me off #i know i have no right to get mad and i'm being irrational but at the same time like. everyone is just like 'omg he's so in love rn' #bc his music has been very angsty and like. idk... conflicted? but his new song was very happy and sweet and very In Love Sounding #and i already know all his music is about one person bc he always talks about the same shit (he's very predictable i see right thru him) #and he's putting out a new song called 'shining' and he has been talking abt a person being his light/shining on him for the last 7yrs atp #so like. that's how i know it's about one specific person and i don't think he has moved on LMAOOO so unless he was dating the same random #7yrs ago i don't think he's dating any of the people they bring up tbh... i pay attention to these things not to brag or anything but like #being attentive to the people i love and noticing inconsistincies in their behavior and when they act diff is like. the only skill i have #at least irt other people LMAO like honestly i wrote all the lyrics he ever wrote down in a google doc and it shows a clear trajectory #that starts like... innocently and just gets more fucked up and toxic as it goes. and ppl say he's one of the most sane ppl they know #meanwhile he's been writing songs about 1 person for nearly 10 years and they get progressively more desperate and insane #I'M JUST SAYING. i completely forgot what my original point was but i guess it was most likely that. no one pays attention to him like i do #the songs started being about this person at the same time i started liking him and having dreams about meeting him btw #and they got progessively more uh. spiteful and desperate and weird as the years went on. did i mention i cast a spell on him 😐 #and he literally says shit like 'it's impossible for me to move on' 'i don't care about anyone else' 'it's like i'm possessed' etc #and after we met at his concert he got really into saying shit like 'that one night wasn't enough' and 'the spotlight between us' #&the ever-famous 'i like the way you look at me' 'my eyes are on you' 'focus on me just look at me' when all i did was look at him all night #if you're reading this right now and thinking 'celeste do you seriously believe a kpop guy has been writing songs about you for 7 years?' #you should remember who i am and how i reacted to ***** having a gf (that i guessed exactly right months before he revealed it) #i'm schizophrenic 🤷‍♀️ but the guy i'm into was the one who started my fascination with soulmates and destiny and fate and shit like that #you know it's funny i mention that because he also started writing about that!!!!! in his songs!!! crazy #and he talks about the person making it hard for him to sleep and wanting to meet them in his dreams again and whathaveyou #i mean even in his two newest title tracks he says 'i'm frustrated in the studio the only melody that comes out is for you' and #'i want to turn everything about you into a song' in the newest one... hm. #and btw he announced his album right when i admitted i was in love with him again to my family (they know my insanity LMAO) #and he releases a song about being happy and in love and listening for someone's voice from far away to reach him/vice versa????? #right when i get back into him??? #it's my fave color & his fave color & he's releasing it in my birth month like. i know billions of coincidences are a thing but it's crazy

[boltgunkiller-archive]

saw brittana s2 era being related to are we still friends by tyler the creator

#juno speaks #oh my goddd… #“are we still friends? can we be friends?” #when you apply the locker scene where santana says britt staring at her is causing her to forget her locker combo… ohh #because britt literally says “did i do something wrong are you mad at me. i miss being close” (not a direct quote but that’s essentially #what she said) and like. my god. because during the s2 era they heavily drifted due to santana’s confession. it wasn’t the confession itself #that drove them apart #more so santana’s own decision to distance herself due to her fear of rejection and #since she got rejected #her subsequent bitter behavior to deflect from what happened and the embarrassment and shame she felt not Only bc she admitted to liking #girls. Liking BRITTANY. but also bc she didn’t even get what she wanted in the end and now people may know and now BRITT knows so she can’t #just go back to being normal and she’s stressed and hurt and upset and she just doesn’t wanna talk to anyone #she just wants to be straight and normal and she wants things to be normal but she can’t handle the idea of facing brittany at all so she #just drifts away from her so brittany desperately tries to fix things and become santana’s best friend again #they’re a two shot they’re best friends they need each other they went from inseparable to not even speaking outside of maybe glee club #it’s got an effect on the both of them and brittany wants to fix whatever happened and go back to being close but santana won’t even tell #her what’s wrong so she has to figure it out for herself (“can we be friends?”) #the song essentially repeats those two lines a lot but they can be applied to more than just that locker scene too #you could apply them to santana denying dancing w brittany/wearing the lebanese shirt because she’s denying brittany’s attempt to not only #fix their relationship but also help santana accept herself. she can’t accept that and all brittany wants is for them to be friends but #in that moment it seems as if santana won’t even accept that they ARE friends #and then in 2x19 she doesn’t accept that well now that artie isn’t in the picture they COULD be more than that (“don’t say goodbye” lowkey) #like santana’s just so closed off it seems like they’re not friends and they can’t even be that and they could never be more either #auuvuh… does this even make sense… losing my mind #gleeposting

[lilgynt]

got un depressed enough to take the dog on a walk immediately got re depressed and had to lay down after letting mom know she didn’t have to walk her tonight

#personal #oh okay thanks mom i frequently flash back to moments with dad at a worrying rate #came home crying yesterday #i’m losing more and more hair in the shower and i’m trying to tell myself it’s not what i think it is even tho getting worse with my ed #am considering just never reaching out to my eldest brother again bc he 180ed during dads thing or like just showed who is he is under #pressure my jobs awful my car is breaking down the dog needs a tooth pulled and my dad is dead #and my mom can’t just keep it straight on if she likes or hates me #or if i’m selfish or not #and ignores me but not cruelly which is worse actually #like my mom stone walling me bc she’s upset or something? okay #it’s so hard to describe like. she cares but she doesn’t #she’ll bring me food or ask how my day is going #but i try holding a conversation or anything and she can’t acknowledge me or turn away from the tv #not even bc she’s mad!! she’s just. not? interested? #i don’t know how to describe it #and im upset she said i was selfish during dads death but she’s a acting like we’re fine now #how are we good. if you genuinely resent me and how i acted during that period how are we good #i can barely talk to you without getting super angry or really desperately wanting you to just. i don’t know not be you? be normal ?

[vampire-time-lady]

Arman to Thony: WE’RE DONE, YOU CAN’T EVEN APPRECIATE WHAT I DO FOR YOU

*a short time later

Arman to everyone: LEAVE MY GIRL ALONE!!!!!!11111!!!!!!!

#armony #arman x thony #arman morales #thony de la rosa #I love they can't stand to be apart even one day #and that his need to protect her is so much stronger than his need to be mad at her #even though he had no right to throw all those things in her face #he know that it was difficult to her and she was reluctant to kill that guy #but I know he is frustrated and angry and desperate and feels like he's backed into the corner #and he regretted those words later #either way just like said kindredhearts13 he needs to get his shit together #tcl #the cleaning lady on fox #the cleaning lady #the cleaning lady season 2

[pepprs]

STILL wide awake! i did not put down my phone! and now im hungry. so i will not be sleeping tonight ♥️

#purrs #also… im gonna admit it. ive been up for hours cleaning out… my toyhouse accounts. not cleaning them out but cleaning them up. and im so #FUCKING mad at my 18 year old self for giving away characters that meant so much to me to 12 year olds on warriors amino who never finished #their half of the art trade… and now so many of them are like. completely out of my reach and i can never get them back. im trying to ask #for the characters ive been able to find and track them down. which for ppl who actually love and care for them im sure is predatory and #annoying bc it’s like ok you made that choice so live with it. but im so fucking mad at myself and i wish i could undo it. i know it doesn’t #matter bc i don’t do that kind of deviantart stuff anymore but like.. i gave away characters who were so special to me growing up and now so #many of them are like.. on locked / unauthorized toyhouses or deleted or the person already owns them and is never trading them and #imjust so SAD!!!!!! over pixels i know. PULLING AN ALL NIGHTER over pixels. but im so saddddd aughhhhh #delete later #(i also did clean out photos and do practice drivers tests btw. but ive mostly been doing toyhouse stuff) #also im so sad and angry charahub went down and i didn’t even know it and i can’t access my data at allll like so much precious info #on there is gone forever. pain and suffering. also it’s worth naming im not in this to like have the best most expensive whatever designs im #doing this bc i desperately want to salvage every piece of my childhood / adolescence and never let go of anything in my life ever and when #i was 18 i thought i could run away from deeply permanently hurting and betraying a friend by selling all of my characters starting w the #ones they made me and then branching off into baiscally all of them to not make it look like it was just abt them bc i couldn’t bear to be #reminded of what i had done. and now i live with the consequences. in more ways than just the characters obviously. so there’s that #(i had my reasons for doing what i had to do btw. but i will never stop feeling guilty about it or regretting how it must have felt for them #bc we were like best friends and then i turned cold and awful because i didn’t know how to communicate my needs so instead i just shut them #out and didn’t even have the decency to explain why. and it fucking sucked that i did that. lol) #* ​and still sucks. and i think abt it all the time and try not to talk about it for a lot of reasons but here i am so. lol