#now if you'll excuse me- it's hot af in here | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

punkscowardschampions · 3 years

Text

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: Boxing Day Extravaganza boop Jimmy: Okay so we know they're taking the train Jimmy: which appaz only takes like 35 mins so that's nice, not to have to entertain the kids for an age Jimmy: cos everywhere would be busy and hellish given that it's boxing day Janis: nice lil' journey, no one has time to get antsy, probably only need to do one hellish train toilet moment per child lol Jimmy: we can all get arty because Jimothy promised to keep doing the bae daily masterpieces Janis: get a table seat, love that for yous Jimmy: Cass just on her phone 🎧 being antisocial the whole time, love you gal, but the rest of us are living our best lives Jimmy: having hot chocolate and all the left over gingerbread and other festive snacks like 😁 Janis: you'll end up having an alright time in your own tween way don't worry Janis: the plethora of christmas toys that you've simply had to bring Jimmy: maybe you can have a Lisa beach friends moment Janis: that'd be cute, some kids at the arcade or something Jimmy: much more British and chill because we haven't stolen Ian's car for you to cover with 🐚s sadly Janis: I used to make friends on hols, live laugh love with whatever kids have also been dragged to Skerries lol Jimmy: I did not which tells you everything you need to know about how shy I was and how much my sister didn't want us to have other friends when we were kids Janis: gatekeeper trace so rude Janis: okay, so we're getting there, what do we wanna hit, obviously all the beachy cliches we can and also some festive ones Jimmy: gonna have a dip in the sea even though it's freezing af even if you only put your feet in lads Jimmy: the awkward moment when you think you only have a day here so you're gonna cram it all in and then be like oh Janis: don't be babies you can do it Janis: not the actual babies though, you will die Jimmy: stay with Cass even though I'm certain Libi will wanna do it Janis: she will be tryna run lmao Jimmy: soz for that Cass Jimmy: you'll be able to go off with your mates when you meet them, just give jj the chance to be competitive in the sea for a sec Jimmy: obvs gotta win something piss easy in the arcade and then lowkey bankrupt yourself trying to get the same thing for the other kid as always happened to my dad LOL Janis: hohaha yes Janis: also last time we went to an arcade you could get gross sour sweets with the tickets so the kids will be pinging Jimmy: love that Jimmy: Jimothy see how many you can fit in your mouth/eat because I would Janis: changing money into all the 2ps for the penny falls and having the cup for the money fun Jimmy: I bloody love an arcade tbh all that good stuff and beach fun and snow fun because it has to snow more for the trains to stop running since you got there okay Janis: when you realize it's coming down fast hun Janis: and I oop Jimmy: should've tried to leave as soon as the snow started but we're not because we don't wanna Jimmy: even though that phone call to Ian to tell him you aren't coming back will be lovely and put you in a great mood Janis: like you LOVE spending time with your kids ok sir Janis: everyone gonna be lowkey pissed soz weather happens lads Jimmy: we're with all our fave peeps we'll soon cheer up and live our best lives Jimmy: we definitely need there to be some board games in this caravan Jimmy: crack out the uno Janis: its not like you're without shelter and warmth, everyone will be fine, we're all buzzing lbr Janis: yes, all the board games, there'll at least be a telly to watch festive shit on Jimmy: Jimothy will make so much tea, we'll be cosy Janis: you should also eat comfort food like beans on toast ty Jimmy: make a little soft world/den for the bubs Janis: campout in the lounge 'cos you're not gonna wanna share a room alone but also don't wanna be separated so enjoy the double moment Cass Jimmy: winning her over with that Janis: at least that's an excuse if we want to message 'cos no privacy whilst they're out here snuggling Jimmy: true that's a good idea Jimmy: and won't wanna wake them by talking out loud when they're eventually asleep which would probably take forever cos buzzing Janis: my thoughts exactly, and it means we can ref a bit without literally sitting here listing every possible thing ourselves Jimmy: ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Jimmy: 👍? Janis: can't really accuse you of making it snow Janis: but my foot does feel in danger again 🪓💘 Jimmy: just do 🌧 me Janis: next doodle sorted Janis: get loads of likes Jimmy: blank page would an' all long as I do a #goals caption Janis: show off Janis: not much chance of me giving you #goals muse inspo in day old clothes so you'll have to rely on that clout Jimmy: LITERALLY the opposite, about the muse not my 🎨 Jimmy: and there's every chance if you don't wear any clothes, duh Janis: you still have to think up the words Janis: and 🔥 emoji usage 🙌😩 Jimmy: nowt challenging about that Jimmy: 😍💕or 🤤 Janis: how much chance do you reckon there is of no clothes Janis: meant to be 🥶 to death here Jimmy: depends how 🔥 you reckon I am Janis: 💯 Janis: obviously Jimmy: but I get it, any excuse for a shopping trip, girl Janis: 🤑🛍😍 Janis: you know me so well Jimmy: meant to be working tomorrow, take your chance while there's still 💰 to be after Janis: bummer Janis: it should clear soon, can't have you pining for it too hard, like Jimmy: 🥺☕💔🎻😭 Jimmy: @ my manager before he has chance to miss me Janis: *replace you Janis: 😬😶 Jimmy: 😱😱 Janis: literally who said that, omg Janis: so rude! Jimmy: brb gotta 👻 there to serve some lattes Janis: yeah, you'll need to wife it before you try and leave me with 3 kids Jimmy: weren't no 💍 in the grabbers, looks like we're going shopping after all, babe Janis: missed a trick there, honestly Janis: probably had a ring pop if we'd looked harder Jimmy: Libi'd have that right off you, mate Jimmy: don't even have to jilt you Jimmy: replaced mid-proposal Janis: true Janis: and she needs no more sugar ever again Janis: ❌ Janis: you'll have to just stay put, soz Jimmy: were gonna get you one of them mood rings but it'd give the game away by saying you weren't ALWAYS 😍 Jimmy: only need the one fan 👀 Janis: how dare you doubt my acting abilities Janis: ALWAYS on and ready for my close up Jimmy: that ain't acting it's 🔮 OBVS Janis: magic, talent Janis: all the same to me 🥇👑 Jimmy: alright bighead, go on Janis: go on what? Jimmy: always on, you said Jimmy: impress me with one of your talents Janis: here and now? Jimmy: might be on for a bit weren't what you said Janis: Libi's already seen you partially clothed once Janis: not trying to traumatize them permanently Jimmy: what you bringing me into it for? it's your talent Janis: already shown you how to juggle too Jimmy: there's nowt else? Janis: rude Janis: you made me sing to you as well, if you recall Jimmy: tah for the reminder to send that to Pete Jimmy: he's looking for a lead 🎤 so I've heard Janis: I'd literally kill you Jimmy: shouldn't have to beg you Jimmy: you know that's all I want Janis: 😤 Janis: obviously all I want it to have an ill-fated romance with Pete but you stagemomming me was not part of the dream Jimmy: you look SO cute when you're fuming Jimmy: what's your plan then? Janis: find a totally natural way to drop hints that I'm dead talented over my lattes, duh Janis: writing lyrics in a notebook, being SO cute 🤔 Jimmy: he's got a girlfriend with a normal sized head, but I think he can read so you're probably on to something there with the last bit Janis: normal? Janis: how...exciting Jimmy: you'll find a natural way to drop hints you're after a threesome an' all I'm sure Janis: sounds like a 🥈 move Janis: if I can't get her chucked what is the point Jimmy: perfect for you, that Janis: in no world am I runner-up Janis: fake or otherwise Jimmy: not to her, just to me Janis: you don't do co-workers, you're disqualified Jimmy: you reckon you could get her chucked but I couldn't get him sacked Janis: 😱 Janis: then comfort him, that's evil Janis: okay 💀👑 Jimmy: 😈 Jimmy: haven't seen her for ages, bit of normality for you, that Janis: me? Janis: she's your favourite customer Janis: clearly spend loads of time chatting and plotting Jimmy: that's Tammy, how dare you Jimmy: she orders loads Janis: she needs the energy for her tiktok dances Janis: don't call her fat Jimmy: that were you Jimmy: I would NEVER Janis: nah, 'course not Janis: she's your bestie Jimmy: #BFF Jimmy: but that's you an' all so Jimmy: 💔 for her Janis: I'm not sharing Jimmy: I'm not making you Janis: you know she'd take a bigger piece Jimmy: she'd try but you'd 🥊 her Janis: you want me to fight for you Jimmy: if she's after me, you're gonna have to protect me Janis: alright Janis: guess I don't wanna see you squashed to death Jimmy: get these bandages off first before I need another set Janis: you can go have an ice bath Janis: if you wanna Jimmy: why would I want that? Jimmy: sounds fucking horrible Janis: not because you're being too 🥵 idiot Janis: to help with the swelling Jimmy: 🙄 I got that Janis: you went in the sea Janis: you just have to sit for a bit longer Jimmy: you didn't wanna be left with 3 kids a bit ago Jimmy: make up your mind, Jeanette Janis: later then Janis: just don't scream and wake them up Jimmy: 💪🏆🥇 Janis: we'll 👀 Jimmy: yeah and you won't hear nowt Janis: 😏 Janis: did it hurt less today Jimmy: [throws a cushion at her for the 😏 and to distract from having to answer that because probably hurt more if anything all the fun and games they've done today] Janis: [inadvertantly start a pillow fight here which you need to then calm back down] Janis: don't think I didn't notice Jimmy: ? Janis: you didn't answer Jimmy: you reckon I never do Janis: it speaks volumes Janis: you're alright Jimmy: there you go then Janis: if you're alright with it being inferred, yeah Jimmy: dunno about your 🤓🗨 Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: I'm alright, leave it out Janis: fine Janis: no hot chocolate for you Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: you're SO rude Janis: yep Janis: that's what you get Jimmy: but Jimmy: we're best mates Janis: maybe Janis: but Bobbys nicer to me so he's getting extra marshmallows Jimmy: it were you going on about how you were gonna be nice to me Jimmy: should've known it were bollocks Janis: you threw the first pillow, mate Jimmy: you chucked out a pisstakey 😏 before that Jimmy: weren't me who started it Janis: not my fault you're known for being well loud Jimmy: isn't it? Jimmy: I'd say it were your fault Janis: don't make me 😏 again Jimmy: alright I'll make you 😳 Janis: I'll blame the ☕s Jimmy: you want a hand? Janis: [throw a LOOK from your kitchen area] Jimmy: [come on over boy and be giving her a LOOK back the entire time obvs] Janis: [do the thing where the kitchen is too small so you're lowkey just in each other's way the whole time in a #mood of a moment like so much more of a hindrance than a help] Jimmy: [and also the thing where you kiss only to break apart as if nothing happened if anyone notices] Janis: [Bobby would be used to you having a gf about as the last one moved herself in but Libi is not so she'd be the kind of kid to be like UMMMMMMM] Jimmy: [Oh Libi you are such an icon] Janis: [just like why you kissing are you boyfriend and girlfriend, Janis like shh bitch] Jimmy: [Jimothy's turn to be 😏 irl] Janis: [when you can't be like NO 'cos how confusing for the kids but you're like not gonna confess my love gal, hush, Libi is so gonna try and smooch Bobby watch out boy] Jimmy: [so here for that adorableness tbh] Janis: [when lil kids are like this is my boyfriend lmao] Janis: you've been replaced now Janis: how does it feel 💔 Jimmy: 🎻🎻😭😭😭 Janis: that's what you get Janis: dumping me mid proposal Jimmy: you keep saying that Jimmy: but from here I ain't proposed yet Janis: don't let on Janis: she'll be raging Jimmy: I'll take her with me tomorrow when I go pick the 💍 Jimmy: get her back on side Janis: got a plan for everything, you Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt Janis: wait until its later in the year and I'm jonesing for more 🎁 again Jimmy: no need, you can have owt you want whenever you want it Jimmy: there's the plan, like Janis: well goals 😍😍 Jimmy: 💕 Janis: if nothing else Janis: plenty of 🌨 to play with tomorrow Jimmy: I do take requests Jimmy: have a 💭 what ⛄ you want Janis: well you are pretty skilled Janis: have to think of something challenging Jimmy: you've got all night Janis: if they ever go to sleep Jimmy: you'll have to read them a long boring story Janis: ❌ voices ❌ personal cameos for you kids Jimmy: get Bill's 👻 in Jimmy: owt of his'll get the job done Janis: 😱😱 so true but you didn't have to go there, babe Jimmy: he can't be fuming that I want you to stay with me, it's his whole brand Janis: 🤞 he don't get too carried away with your 💀 scene now or they'll be having nightmares and then there'll be no time for ⛄ Jimmy: they'll be able to hack it Janis: hack you up into lots of pieces Jimmy: don't matter about me, long as no 🐕s are 💀💀💀 Janis: if nothing he knows his audience Jimmy: I get it, you wanna marry him Janis: pretty sure he's married Janis: bet he's got more than 3 kids as well Jimmy: and what you're gonna let that stop you? doubt that Janis: rude Janis: breaking up Pete and his groupie is one thing Janis: homewrecking is another Jimmy: 👌 Janis: you're 👌 at me now Jimmy: I just did do Jimmy: you'll be chuffed to know I had a look and he has got 3 kids Jimmy: one of them was a twin called Judith, so you might be his daughter Janis: like he had twins or one survived Janis: I'll take being the 💀 one if that's the option Jimmy: the dead one was a lad Janis: ugh Janis: great Janis: more lesbian jokes Jimmy: we've 💀💀💀 them, you're alright Janis: had no idea Judith was such an old name Jimmy: can't say I ain't taught you owt 🤓 Jimmy: know my audience an' all Janis: can't help yourself 🤓 Janis: I reckon Jimmy: you can't help nerd flirting with me, more like Jimmy: about to crack the chess set out, you Janis: chequers, maybe Jimmy: dunno never played Janis: just chess for thick people Janis: less 🤔🤓 more 🥴🤯 Jimmy: still too northern 💔 what were I gonna do make the bits out of 🥔 Janis: don't reckon we've got it in so you're safe Jimmy: what do you wanna do instead? Janis: that's the question Jimmy: answer it then Jimmy: [a LOOK] Janis: [😳] Janis: it's not obvious? Jimmy: might be but it should be just as obvious that I wanna hear it Janis: how badly I want some alone time with you just increased Jimmy: 🚬? Janis: worth a go Jimmy: [do your best to try and escape lads] Janis: [probably enough into our hot chocolate/festive film to give you a few minutes here] Jimmy: [take your chance and leg it] Janis: [lord knows you need the moment Jimmy: [it's deserved you didn't know you'd still be here with all these kids and no privacy whatsoever] Janis: [what a time, at least you don't have to go home and separate 'cos heaven forbid] Jimmy: [that would suck, the time between boxing day and nye is weird enough if you like your fam and aren't a highkey teen in love so] Janis: [hence 'I missed you' like you've not spent forever together at this point and barely been apart] Jimmy: [hence the most genuine smile ever like an adorable nerd because whatever he was expecting her to say was not that but we're here for it] Janis: [when you go to nudge him like shut up but it's more of a feelsy lean and we all know it 'sorry about missing work' 'cos we feel bad even if there's fuck all we can or could do about it] Jimmy: [always gotta give that feelsy lean back regardless of how much it hurts us which gets him thinking about how much work would suck being this injured so we're 😒 which makes it seem like we're really annoyed about missing work even though we know he'd rather be here, hence the shrug he does when he snaps out of said thoughts 'you're my fave job any road, said it before' stop calling her a job sir even if you said that in a more feelsy tone than the words suggest] Janis: ['charming as the first time' and a 🙄 we're probably playing off as more jokey than it is] Jimmy: ['nowt I'd wanna be doing more than pissing about here with you, what could be more charming than that?' maybe if you'd said that in the first place boy instead of calling her a job again] Janis: ['I'm against serving coffee to ungrateful dickheads, it's not much to brag about, like' but a shrug and 😏 'cos we're not fuming over it] Jimmy: ['loads else you could if you wanted to' just telling her she's 🥇 basically there 'but I'll do it if not' casual hypeman is how that sounds but we're just 😍] Jimmy: [when I was asleep a little list of things he likes about her/she could brag about came to me so I'll try and recreate it from memory for us now, first he was obvious and just wrote fit on her arm or wherever but then did a camera and painting mime to emphasise that and tell her she was a good muse before adding mysterious where he wrote fit but then it started getting cute cos he drew little vampire teeth in the air above her smile and a sun on her face which he added the 😁 grin to obvs and then because we were in that general area he wrote nerd in caps on her neck across the biggest lovebite because not only is she such a one but to include nerd flirting then we moved to her throat and he did 🗨 because he likes talking to her and added a 🎵 inside because she's genuinely a good singer then wrote fun before adding the ny as well cos she's also a laugh then he went down to where her abs are and wrote athlete also in caps because DUH and finally on her ribs did the ✔ again because she's been taking care of him and is so kind and nice etc and while he was there got carried away just drawing an elaborate and massive rose for all the love and feels we can't currently express] Jimmy: [there might have been others I'm forgetting but those were definitely the main ones] Janis: [I'm dying boo, we're going to have to be physical because if we aren't speechless then things will be said but it's going to be the most intense and loving ever so we know] Jimmy: [not letting that be interrupted, soz children fend for yourselves for a minute please] Janis: [it's not like we've gone far, you're fine and we need this so we don't die] Jimmy: [my half asleep day dream has killed us all I am soz] Janis: [we're not soz at all, y'all living your best life] Jimmy: [the feels have never been higher] Janis: [are gonna have to force you back in eventually] Jimmy: [if only so y'all don't declare your love in words as well] Janis: [smack on that window children because it's too damn soon hush] Jimmy: [Libi 👀 to see if you're kissing] Janis: [she's gonna tell everyone lmao, tiniest shipper] Jimmy: [I love her with my whole heart] Janis: [mcvickers getting that lowdown they did not ask for when we're back, accidental snitching, at least we're being good-ish lmao] Jimmy: [Fearghal gonna be so amused, Tess will not LOL but yeah you've taken good care of this bub so you win points for that lads] Janis: [can't say fairer than that] Jimmy: [gonna be so heartbreaking when you're not allowed to stay there and see Libi, I could cry] Janis: [we have to make things go so downhill in a sec in a lot of ways, sad times] Jimmy: [winnie will love the drama, but for now go inside and try and get these kids to fall asleep] Janis: [threaten them with separation if they don't start to chill, that'll work] Jimmy: [try not to lol at how horrified they are at the prospect] Janis: 😱💔💀 Jimmy: #relatable for you, that Janis: you wish Jimmy: 🎂 Jimmy: ain't even Jesus' birthday no more Jimmy: can't piggyback off that Janis: sound like a right parent Janis: over before it's even started Jimmy: none of the fans know when mine is, might just have it so you have to get me more 🎁🎁🎁 Janis: that's not fair Janis: you'll get whatevers left in the grabber and that'll be that Janis: you'll have to pretend you won it for me and all or it's not very #goals Jimmy: told you loads of times I don't play fair, Jules 🏆 and that's that Jimmy: spoil me on my fake birthday or you ain't very #goals Janis: well used to bdays not being fair 🎻🎻 Janis: 15 years too late for that to sting Jimmy: poor baby Jimmy: hang on, I'll knock you up your own 🎂 Jimmy: [genuinely goes to make her a mug cake in secret, look away children there's none for you bye] Janis: such a 🤓 Janis: [like we're not 😍] Jimmy: So you don't want it? Alright Jimmy: [we know she do] Janis: never said that Janis: [grabby hands like gimme] Jimmy: [🤫 which he always looks hot doing like okay cover me so you don't have to share this with the children] Janis: [🤐 like I got this] Jimmy: [cleaning the kitchen but also sneaky doing this and when it's done gesturing for her to come here so they can swap places and she can sneakily eat it, just know he has 1000% put a little candle it in and lit it with the best lighter ever because every mum has a drawer of shit like that it's simply facts] Janis: [obviously taking a picture of this] Janis: why are you Jimmy: 'cause you're Jimmy: and I just Janis: you're Janis: too nice Jimmy: Bollocks Janis: nah Jimmy: yeah Janis: to me Jimmy: I'm as nice as I wanna be to you Janis: I ain't earnt it Jimmy: when have I said that? Janis: you haven't but it's still true Jimmy: up to me is what it is Janis: you hand out the 🏆 Jimmy: take yours Jimmy: you've been nice to me for ages Jimmy: what were it I said the other day, you'd be telling me to piss off by the end of this one Jimmy: worth a 🏆 that you've not Janis: just in it for the cake Janis: obviously Jimmy: you've done alright then Janis: it's not hard Janis: being nice to you Jimmy: I thought you were gonna say to make a cake Janis: [irl 😏 from the kitchen trying not to lol] Jimmy: didn't know I were fake dating a dickhead like Paul Hollywood Janis: again, you wish Jimmy: no denying that 👴💕 Jimmy: but I'll have to make do with a 🤝 off you for now Janis: [obviously come back over and do said handshake like a nerd and like it's not dangerous to be anywhere near each other rn] Jimmy: [you know he's gonna run his thumb across her lip whether there's any chocolate there or not because the mood we're in and we can pretend it's because it's so secret like can't let the children see the evidence] Janis: [thank god for the solid excuse to snuggle like we're going sleep now come on] Jimmy: [just 👀 at these kids all the damn time like are you asleep yet] Janis: [finally] Janis: I think she's asleep Janis: he's 50/50 Jimmy: [chucks something at him, softly obvs] Jimmy: 👍 Janis: that was a risk Jimmy: [😏 because we love a risk like that] Jimmy: didn't reckon on you as 🙀🙀 Janis: you reckoned right then Janis: good for you Jimmy: 🏆 Janis: don't get carried away Janis: I'm the one that's not scared Jimmy: prove it Janis: [a look that's half well how would you like me to do that and half, I'm thinkin'] Jimmy: [just a LOOK like] Janis: [I like to think you two are at least in the middle 'cos Libi and Bobby wouldn't stop chatting so you had to make a human barrier lol, so that makes it less hard to kiss him now and give him a new quick love bite but also harder to just stop there] Jimmy: [you know you're getting one back for literally no reason whatsoever gal] Janis: [casually trying have a makeout sesh in total silence rn] Jimmy: [we know how impossible that is for either of you so good luck] Janis: [gonna have to stop and pretend you're just being like, see, not scared] Jimmy: [gonna have to go for that ice bath for all the reasons now boy lol] Janis: they're definitely asleep Jimmy: 🤞 Janis: I would've woke up Jimmy: you don't sleep 🧛 Janis: you want me to? Janis: [turning our back like night then] Jimmy: [you know we're rolling you back to face us girl even if it hurts us because have to be hot about everything] Janis: [a noise we're 🤞 just sounds like a sleepy sound 'cos there was no helping it] Jimmy: [kiss her so you don't make any of your own thank you sir, don't need to tempt fate and risk waking these kids up that soon] Janis: [can't even go to another room really 'cos doubt Cass is asleep] Jimmy: [she definitely isn't, soz lads for this struggle] Janis: 😣 😖 😫 😩 🥺 😢 😭 😤 😠 😡 🤬 🤯 😳 🥵 Janis: just so you know Jimmy: I did but now it's in writing I've gotta do something about it Janis: 👻 rules or? Jimmy: the only 👻 rule is no touching, don't reckon that'll sort it Janis: remind me why we invited them Jimmy: Ian's a twat, that were mostly it Janis: right Janis: that sounds about right Jimmy: least the 🐕's not here an' all Janis: 🌦 Jimmy: give us a bit more ☀ Janis: that's me and you though Jimmy: what kind of dickhead am I pushing in front of you like that? SO rude Janis: I'm so shy Janis: understated, honestly Jimmy: [when you're trying to stop yourself from loling] Janis: [fake punch him like oi] Janis: about to call you chivalrous but you can forget it now Jimmy: soz you can't have the 🙊 it's a bit too risky for me to use Janis: such an idiot Janis: why'd I invite you again Jimmy: Dunno Jimmy: @ me when you've worked it out Janis: you're too busy to show me? Jimmy: ❌ Jimmy: too something though Jimmy: 😣 😖 😫 😩 🥺 😢 😭 😤 😠 😡 🤬 🤯 😳 🥵 Janis: you needed an ice bath anyway Janis: see how far we get without freezing? Janis: [getting up carefully to find 🚬s or a lighter like ?] Jimmy: [doing a help me up style gesture] Janis: [do, do not drop him now and do a throwback by kissing him against the door as you go out] Jimmy: [we love a throwback in this house honey] Janis: [thank god for cigarette breaks even though it will be very cold, we're extra] Jimmy: [your extraness will help keep you warm] Jimmy: [literally reminds me of when Baze had just got together and went on a caravan hol with the fam] Janis: [yes, very that energy, the sneaking is less high stakes but still] Jimmy: [you can go in harder than they could out there because less likely to be caught and less of a problem if you are so you're welcome for that] Janis: [literally we just don't want to wake the kids and make them cranky or cringe Cass out so you're fine lads, go nuts, who is at this caravan park in December, barely anyone] Jimmy: [fill your boots, you're very in love rn] Janis: [lowkey something is gonna get said during we're gonna have to pretend we do not hear lmao] Jimmy: [walking such a tightrope at all times, god bless] Janis: [go pretend to sleep lol] Jimmy: [the amount of things he would have to stop himself from saying when they are, you hush your mouth I swear down] Janis: [hence you ain't allowed, commit to this act please and ty, no more chit chatting] Jimmy: [he's not even allowed to say her name at this point so literally shhhhhh] Janis: [made that rod for your back boo lmao] Jimmy: [no regrets, it will HIT when he does] Jimmy: [you know he's not asleep though cos you know he can't get comfortable thanks for that Ian you dick] Janis: you should go get in a bed to yourself Janis: if he wakes up, I can tell him where you are Jimmy: I'm alright Janis: alright Jimmy: [just being fussy though so clearly isn't] Janis: you're never going to be able to sleep though Jimmy: challenge accepted Janis: you're keeping me awake Jimmy: it's you 🗨 Janis: you're 😫😤 Jimmy: but not 😭😭 Janis: I can still hear you Janis: and you keep moving about because you can't get comfortable Jimmy: stop being a dickhead Janis: I'm not Janis: go get comfortable and I'll keep an eye on them both, that's nice Jimmy: how's chucking me out nice? Janis: for the aforementioned reasons Jimmy: for you that I won't be doing your head in Janis: no, so you aren't in as much fucking pain, idiot Jimmy: 👍 Janis: [angrily stomp off for a wee hen] Jimmy: [do your own to that 🛏 when she gets back] Janis: [oh the drama] Janis: thanks Jimmy: there's nowt to stop you 😴 Jimmy: crack on Janis: hardly Janis: there's two small, wriggly children Janis: don't need to be moody about it Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Jimmy: don't need to go on at me now you've got what you want Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: or 🙄 at me either Janis: alright, shut up then Jimmy: you Janis: it's not my fault Jimmy: never said it were Janis: then stop taking it out on me Janis: do something about it that's actually gonna help you feel better Jimmy: I've not, I've said nowt about it Jimmy: you're the one who can't leave it out Janis: you're in a mood Jimmy: not with you, dickhead Janis: I know that Jimmy: 💭 what it were like when you fucked your ankle up Jimmy: this actually were my own fault Janis: no it ain't Janis: and I'm meant to just ignore it then, alright Janis: won't be doing that, sorry Jimmy: Bollocks, you can't go about being a massive dickhead and expect no pushback Jimmy: but it weren't this bad before Janis: it's too far Janis: you could literally be in hospital and it wouldn't be an overreaction Janis: there's no call for that Jimmy: it ain't you who decides where the line is Jimmy: or where I'll end up Janis: it's a pretty widely agreed upon line Janis: he could ask garda if he wanted to do something about you taking the car Jimmy: we've been mates for a minute, what do you know? Janis: that doesn't have nothing to do with being able to tell he took it too far this time Jimmy: you don't know fuck all about me or what he has or hasn't done Janis: I've seen the state of you, for fuck's sake Janis: I'm not saying shit about previous or implying that it means anything but you can barely breathe right now Jimmy: the state of me is right, what bit of this has owt to do with you? Janis: I'm not going to piss about with you doing stupid shit if you aren't handling your actual Janis: that's what Jimmy: piss off Janis: you Jimmy: who the fuck are you giving me ifs and buts Jimmy: you piss about with me whenever it suits you Janis: fuck this Jimmy: yeah Janis: [hear that door go] Jimmy: 👍 Janis: I'll be back when I need to be Jimmy: for all you know you've woke every dickhead up and that's now Jimmy: but alright, keep giving it out like you're so bothered about the state of me and the bollocks I can't do while you leave me here on my own Jimmy: not fake at all Janis: I know it ain't Janis: and if you're gonna leave a 4 year old kid to freak out that'd be on you Janis: I don't have to stay and listen to you, who the fuck are you Jimmy: fuck's sake Janis: I didn't slam the door, they're asleep Jimmy: that's alright then Jimmy: forget I said owt Jimmy: top reaction Janis: yeah 'cos you've got fuck all room to talk Janis: be better for you if I did Jimmy: I don't wanna do this Jimmy: talk about it Jimmy: have to fucking handle it or whatever it were that you said Janis: then don't talk about it Janis: it's the bare fucking minimum to not expect me to ignore that you're in pain Jimmy: and what, you think I don't know that? Jimmy: that I wouldn't do a better job of this if I could Janis: apparently, I've got no right so Jimmy: you shouldn't have to hack this an' all Janis: I don't Janis: all I was doing was saying go sleep on a proper bed Jimmy: it's just Jimmy: I don't know Jimmy: weird Janis: how is it Jimmy: I said I dunno Jimmy: it's been ages since anyone bothered to say owt worth listening to like that Janis: well Janis: why fuck yourself up more Janis: that's it, it's no deeper than that Jimmy: Why not? Jimmy: that's been the question up to now Janis: if you're gonna self-harm Janis: don't do it in front of me Jimmy: you get to hold the 🔪 my dear, and when you do it'll be a pisstake if you don't go harder than that Janis: I'm not playing right now Jimmy: nor me Jimmy: what I meant were, it don't matter to me what happens to me if it only happens to me Jimmy: very catholic of me, I know Janis: i'm not interested in having no more blood on my hands Jimmy: not bleeding out as of now Jimmy: you're welcome to piss off again if I ever am Janis: 👍 Jimmy: is it? Janis: yep Jimmy: what kind of answer is that? Janis: what do you want? Jimmy: and what kind of question is that an' all? Janis: I'm not in the mood Janis: to talk to you or do this Janis: I'll be back to do my share and then we'll go back as soon as we can Jimmy: just come back now Jimmy: it's freezing Janis: I'm fine Jimmy: I won't be if I have to piss about looking for you Janis: don't Janis: I know where I am, it's not your concern Jimmy: don't make me Janis: for fuck's sake Jimmy: is right Jimmy: come back and ignore me from here Janis: don't tell me what to do Janis: I'll come back when I'm ready Jimmy: don't be a twat Jimmy: then I won't have to Janis: how far do you reckon I've got in this time Janis: I'm basically outside Jimmy: 💪🏆🥇 you Jimmy: might've 🏃 anywhere Janis: it's snowing Janis: in case you'd forgotten Jimmy: that'll be why I want you to come inside Jimmy: tah for recognising it Janis: don't come near me then Jimmy: alright Janis: [show up a few minutes later] Jimmy: [we do be giving her space like she requested thankfully but we have made her a tea because it's our love language and it is cold af out there no lie] Janis: [act like you're not gonna take it for as long as you can but clearly do] Jimmy: [go to your bed sir and give it a while before you come at her again] Jimmy: What did you mean? Janis: about what? Jimmy: you said you don't wanna do this, which bit? Janis: I was talking about tonight Janis: not permanent plans Jimmy: weren't how it sounded Jimmy: you had a plan and it were to piss off back there as soon as Janis: both gotta work Janis: both got kids that don't belong to us Janis: just the obvious next step, really Jimmy: if you wanna pretend that's why, go on, obviously Janis: I'm not pretending shit Jimmy: you don't have to be a massive dickhead to keep it going just 'cause I already were Janis: obviously I don't want to spend no more time with you too Janis: why would I Jimmy: no idea Janis: there you go then Jimmy: alright then Janis: she'll be gutted Jimmy: ? Janis: Libi Jimmy: already spent ages longer here than we were going to Janis: true Jimmy: and she don't need to know that you're #overit and me Janis: makes playdates a bit awkward Jimmy: what's a bit more faking? nowt we haven't done before Janis: right Jimmy: she's less thick than most of our audience but still only a kid Janis: no need to break them up Jimmy: agreed Janis: sorted Jimmy: ✔ Janis: anything else we need to? Jimmy: like what? Janis: dunno Janis: why I asked Jimmy: it's your question, weren't me who asked it Janis: I don't ask questions I know the answer to Janis: as a rule Jimmy: if you had something in mind, say it Janis: there's loads of shit Janis: potentially Janis: mainly how we're finishing this if we are Jimmy: up to you that Jimmy: it's you who wants to Janis: no it isn't Jimmy: weren't me who said I wanna go back or that I dunno why you're worth spending time with Janis: like you've not said shit tonight Janis: and neither of those is saying I want to finish it, anyway Jimmy: what else does not wanting to spend any more time with someone mean? Janis: we've been mates for what, a minute? Janis: we were doing it before then Jimmy: so you just don't wanna be mates? Janis: not worked out so great thus far Jimmy: bit rude Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: it were going alright Jimmy: you don't need to chuck it all Jimmy: not for something that weren't about you Janis: you bighead is really showing Jimmy: how is it? Janis: 'chuck it all' Janis: I was fine before you came about, tah Jimmy: you know what I mean Janis: how you say shit matters Jimmy: how I say loads of bollocks Jimmy: you get most of it Janis: I'm dickhead lingual, I guess Jimmy: I'm sorry, alright Jimmy: for what I said when I was in pain, that load of bollocks Janis: if you never phrase it like that again Janis: alright Janis: forget about it Jimmy: deliberately will ALWAYS phrase it like that now, each time Janis: if you could not make a habit of it, be appreciated Jimmy: being a MASSIVE dickhead? bit late for that Janis: I can handle that Janis: taking shit back that you've said Janis: leave off that Jimmy: not a habit I want Jimmy: only fancy the ones that'll 💀💀💀 me which that ain't gonna if it makes you piss off out of it Janis: a deal then? Janis: deal back on, actually Jimmy: if we shake on it Janis: okay Janis: come out then Jimmy: come here then Jimmy: meant to take your advice and stay put like a good lad here 🛏 me Janis: you're awkward how and when it suits you Janis: [but does, obviously] Jimmy: [will shake your hand and pull you into a hug gal] Janis: [the most dramatic hug, definitely forgetting to be careful here soz] Jimmy: [not caring that much because we care more about the bae knowing how soz we are and how many feels we have] Janis: [likewise, the tension got too much and went wrong, as it does, and we're #shooketh] Jimmy: [straight up asking her to stay for a bit because we're in our emotions so we're just saying what we wanna say without thinking about it] Janis: [just nodding 'cos that's all we can do] Jimmy: [making room for her as if this isn't a single bed lol] Janis: [at least you'll remember to be careful again and not hug him so hard, but then you're like oh, 'cos don't want to make it a Thing™ again so 'sorry, if you think I was making it all about me'] Jimmy: [a noise like no that is not what we think because 1. the strength of how much we don't think that 2. what are words and just hugging her for the emphasis] Janis: [shrugs like it's okay but we're not gonna keep going like we don't believe him even if we lowkey don't] Jimmy: [just looking at her like ! 'I think it's more of a headfuck than you signed up for, nowt else'] Janis: [just looking like how do I even explain that that's not your fault and literally the last thing either of us should be concerned about because it does not matter, just shaking our head like nah] Jimmy: [playing with her hair cos it would've had snow on it recently because there is too much we wanna say about our feels and so much we feel like we can't say about our family situation] Janis: ['I CAN handle it' like trust me] Jimmy: ['me an' all' like same even though you lowkey can't] Janis: [soft kiss] Jimmy: [you can have some little kisses too gal like my boo loves] Janis: [just being the most soft] Jimmy: [you gotta] Janis: ['we're alright, yeah?'] Jimmy: [a nod because the emotions are still too high rn and I'm not letting you say shit thank you] Janis: [sigh of relief] Jimmy: [hugging you again cos we don't want you to leave] Janis: [you can stay here lads, the bubs will be alright and you'll hear if they ain't] Jimmy: [snuggle it's what you both need] Janis: [let 'em be for a hot sec] Jimmy: [mhmm] Janis: [what shall we do in the AM?] Jimmy: [make breakfast together for these bubs obvs because all the domestic bliss needed] Janis: [might have to trek to the shop to get supplies, that'll be an adventure] Jimmy: [maybe you can make them some kind of sledge because you're both crafty art hoes] Janis: [I bet there's some kind of tings in a caravan that would work, cannot think what exactly but we know the vibes, get creative] Jimmy: [I wouldn't have the first clue but you two would figure it out and you can get Cass to help she'd be into that] Janis: [as well as snowball fight and snowman making competition, which are 2 points we wanted to hit too] Jimmy: [love that and you can also make snow dogs for these bubs] Jimmy: [the question is should we let them have another night here before we send them back or is that too dangerous] Janis: [I think we should for the danger of it/to prove we can lol] Jimmy: [I'm down, just don't have another argument please] Janis: [hohaha, be good] Jimmy: [I have faith in you] Janis: [the only thing I've said you've done is baking/crafts so apart from that enjoy your snow/beach funtimes, you should also get chips for dinner, obvs] Jimmy: [yeah I'm trying to think if there's anything else they should do] Janis: [there's potential the kids have said more? because this is a whole long weekend and they don't know/care not to so, that's potentially something we need to know] Jimmy: [oh that's a good idea, is there any tea you want spilled] Janis: [hmm, she'd probably just KEEP talking about her parents like all the things she's been told about Edie specifically, so all that tea, just more than we've got out so far] Jimmy: [likewise can picture Bobby really driving home the point that he doesn't have a mum and like what he remembers about her being basically nothing so it'd be obvious they haven't seen her for ages not just since they moved] Janis: [poor babs, just bonding and JJ are here like and I OOP] Jimmy: [I hope Cass isn't around when you're spilling that tea bub cos she will be fuming] Janis: [that is potentially a thing unless he knows better by now lol] Jimmy: [this boy living his best life with his new bff deal with it Cass] Janis: [soz hen, you'll be hanging with your new mates as much as you can so we're probably fine] Jimmy: [getting all that arcade swag] Janis: [love that we're pretending we don't hear any of this clear drama lmao ly babes] Jimmy: [poor Jimothy having to just sign all this back and forth like] Janis: [I do think for a bit Libi would keep shouting like he'll hear her eventually 'cos she's only little so that'll be amusing/a time just screeching everything lowkey] Jimmy: [that's really pure babe I do stan you] Janis: [people like that's a loud child lollollol] Jimmy: [I hope you're not still shouting when you go home hun, hilarious as that would be] Janis: [mcvickers like lawd, she'll be showing them how to sign what she's learnt like just in case bobby comes round] Jimmy: [which he definitely will at some point, all the playdates forever] Janis: [fully gonna just try and take herself to Jimmy's all the time like no gal] Jimmy: [shows up at his door because they literally live that close to each other everyone like !!!???] Janis: [troublemaker baby] Jimmy: [do so love the edition of her to this lil family unit JJ are making here though, she really does add to it] Janis: [agreed, it's very cute, she'd probably have told him about how Astrid is technically her auntie but like a year younger 'cos that's wild to kids, so gonna get a sense of how messy this fam is lol] Jimmy: [and she doesn't talk either so Libi would be used to having to find ways to communicate with her too even though we know Ro be pretending there's no issue rn] Janis: [exactly dr phil, we all been knew and trying to work around it apart from ro lmao, just giving a lowdown on every auntie she has which would be amusing and probably a lowkey drag for some of y'all ladies, we know Janis and Billie are her faves] Jimmy: [I can wholeheartedly support those faves gal, Billie would always be doing the most for her and Astrid, fuck you Ro you dusty bitch, Bobby would love all this cos they lowkey have no fam] Janis: [take 'em for rides on your fancy wheelz, they'd love that, just like you can come meet them when we get back like okay JJ, all this is happening regardless, soz] Jimmy: [if she was here you'd have a bomb sledge hens she's probably built Libi and Astrid all kinds of things, Bobby will love all of Ali's animals and shit she has too, casual farm moment] Janis: [probably telling you every cats name too, poor Jimothy is gonna need a break lol] Jimmy: [unrelated but related do you think Ali would have space for any horses because I have all that Cass horse content] Janis: [I think it makes sense, I too have some gay horse content, like it wouldn't be a working farm but I think she'd have various farmyard animals just for the household] Jimmy: [yeah it made sense to me too, like your auntie vibes] Janis: [mhmm, and it could've been just land when we inherited it but she's swagged it up now she has more time/the kids aren't bubs etc] Jimmy: [Bobby just asking if they can have a kitten, Jimothy like NO] Janis: [I'm cackling, 'cos Libi like YEAH] Jimmy: [just like okay can we have a chicken/pony/donkey whatever else creatures there are, Jimothy like lawd] Janis: [just shoving the whole barn into your rental home, god bless you tiny fools] Jimmy: [and then Bobby obvs wants to phone Twix and Jimothy is just trying to distract him because we don't wanna phone Ian and he won't play along with this thank you] Janis: [distract y'all with an activity fast] Jimmy: [they could make dog treats, it's not very difficult] Janis: ]that's a good idea boo] Jimmy: [casual gift to these pups] Janis: [they'll enjoy that, kids and dogs, also can have a tea party for the toy pups lol] Jimmy: [so CUTE gonna say that Jimothy draws you a little comic strip or something about these pups kids] Jimmy: [I don't know what daily doodle you're getting today Janis, but something loved up for sure] Janis: [frankly, we're all living today hun] Jimmy: [do you wanna do this night like we did the one before with them chatting again or are we just saying it's a chill loved up vibe?] Janis: [hmm hmm hmm, let's do it, maybe we can be cute] Jimmy: [you start it then gal cos I did before] Janis: [on it sonic] Janis: 🥇🏆💪 Jimmy: 😏 Janis: come on, we bossed it Jimmy: no need to sound surprised Jimmy: just that kind of team Janis: not going to disagree Janis: 🤐 'til they 😴 aside Jimmy: don't wanna fight with you either, you're alright Janis: really? Janis: 🍀 night Jimmy: unless you desperately wanna 🥊 with me, obvs Jimmy: can't turn you down then Janis: I'm gutted, obviously Janis: but I think I'll survive Jimmy: good Jimmy: 💀💀💀 ain't happening til they're 😴 either Janis: that's a promise? Jimmy: depends Janis: ? Jimmy: do you want me to break it or keep it? Jimmy: 'cause they might not be asleep for ages Janis: 😒 Janis: should've laced the hot chocolates, you're right Jimmy: we'll have to go properly on the run if either of them 💀💀💀 Jimmy: I'm in Janis: knew you would be Janis: you can break your promise then Jimmy: round 2 ☕ coming up Janis: 😏 Janis: warn me next time you plan on being so 😍 yeah Jimmy: be loads of warnings Jimmy: never shut me up Janis: just say you aren't up to it, babe Janis: 😶 Jimmy: Why would I lie to you, girl? Janis: well you don't need to shut up on my account Jimmy: I get it, you need 🔊 Janis: needs a big word Jimmy: is it? Janis: don't you think? Jimmy: that's not an answer Janis: I know what I want Janis: you'll have to convince me on need Jimmy: alright Janis: not mad about it if you aren't Jimmy: Why wouldn't I be? Janis: it's been a pretty knackering day being the 😎 brother and translator Jimmy: *standard Jimmy: nowt if not used to all that Janis: alright, show-off Janis: you're 🥇 we get it Jimmy: you've done alright an' all, don't be 💔 Janis: don't worry Janis: not a title I'm after, I know I'm not that good Jimmy: how do you? Janis: I don't do half as much with Libi Janis: or for her Jimmy: she still reckons you're 🥇 I had to translate her going on and on about it Janis: don't act like it was a chore 😘 Jimmy: you just said it were Jimmy: make up your mind, Jules Janis: no I never Jimmy: knackering, I think it were Janis: that's looking after this lot Janis: not hyping me up Janis: that's a privilege, DUH Jimmy: so funny, you Janis: oi Jimmy: what? Jimmy: you wanted a compliment Janis: say it like you mean it, boy Jimmy: [writes it on her how he did the other day] Janis: [try not to lol 'cos we know you ticklish and 😳] Jimmy: [go over it again like look how much I mean this, soz gal] Janis: [just wriggling away like staph] Janis: you're such a pisstake Jimmy: what, you still don't believe me? Janis: I believe you Janis: don't tickle me again or I will have to get you back Janis: been warned Jimmy: [obviously does by writing how? as in how will you get me back?] Janis: ['scuse us for our lols children, I hope you're sleepy enough that this doesn't devolve into an entire group tickle fight lmao] Janis: [but the LOOK will speak for us regardless] Jimmy: [always gonna give you a LOOK back] Janis: [smile at him too, like we can't even help it] Jimmy: [of course you're getting one back too because that kind of thing is infectious but also 😍 because her smile is always cute] Janis: you're fit Jimmy: you Janis: you x2 Jimmy: you 🏆🏆🏆 Janis: you're being very giving with the 🏆s lately Jimmy: and what? Janis: maybe I think I should do more to earn 'em Jimmy: I might reckon you have Janis: I can do better Jimmy: go on then Janis: wait Jimmy: but Janis: blame them Janis: [pisstakey evils at the children] Jimmy: [just mime killing them in all the ways boy] Janis: when we get back Janis: you'll give me some alone time before you go Jimmy: that a question or an order? Janis: a ? would be polite, I guess Jimmy: don't sound like you, that Janis: cheek Jimmy: I'll give you owt you want, since you asked Janis: *nicely Jimmy: you could do better Janis: ['please' in his ear 'cos deserved after the tickling] Jimmy: [bite your lip please sir because we all know that affected you very much but the children don't need to] Janis: [pleased with ourselves dot com] Janis: better? Jimmy: it'll do for now Janis: gutted they're too young to leave in the arcade as well Jimmy: or chuck out in the snow Janis: it is melting a bit Janis: can go back tomorrow Jimmy: 💔 Janis: not saying it to 💔 now Jimmy: 🤞 I ain't gonna start 😭😭 now Janis: you'd never Janis: too 😎 Jimmy: too northern Janis: same Jimmy: SO much in common, us Janis: Does that mean we ain't star-crossed enough? 😱 Jimmy: it'll mean the #haters have to work harder at it Jimmy: Bill's gonna be chuffed to bits with that Janis: true enough Janis: if you're still here when school starts, Lucas is ready and waiting Jimmy: do you reckon he got any new ties for christmas? Janis: from who? the ex Janis: unlikely, that bitch Jimmy: 🎅 DUH Jimmy: bound to be best mates Jimmy: both into having kids on their laps Janis: ugh Janis: 🎅 gonna have snitched about us Jimmy: be about right Jimmy: fucking dickhead Janis: 💔 Janis: no presents no more lift offers Jimmy: only the full orchestra following you round Jimmy: poor baby Janis: tell me about it Janis: gonna be depressing as fuck Jimmy: can't have that Jimmy: you're my ☀ Janis: 🔫 the 🥁 for me Jimmy: what? Janis: don't orchestras have drummers? Janis: 🎹🎻 then Jimmy: bit weird that you went right for him 🎯 Janis: so #notlikeothergirls of me Jimmy: not knowing if he exists Jimmy: might be a copout of you Janis: just meant he ain't the lead singer but yeah Janis: ask Pete Jimmy: can't be, that's you Janis: well I am my own favourite person but no need to spread that about Jimmy: can't do that either, your fav's meant to be me Janis: hang on Janis: I'll post something to that effect Janis: [do] Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: [have a little socials flirting sesh to further ramp up the tension that's always there] Janis: [you're always about that kids] Jimmy: ☕? Janis: if you mean tea Janis: I'll 🤮 if I have another hot chocolate Janis: and the gals aren't here to impress Jimmy: 🐕🍪? Janis: fuck off 😏 Jimmy: [IRL 😏] Janis: [just checking him out whilst he makes tea so casually] Jimmy: [will do the lingering touch when he gives it to her cos we're in a rom com] Janis: I get it, you miss work SO much Jimmy: nowt to do with missing you Janis: don't be silly Jimmy: 🤐 Janis: insensitive to suggest we deafen her too? 🤷 Jimmy: she has done every other dickhead Janis: 😂 Janis: only fair Jimmy: [mime some ways you can deafen this poor bub] Janis: [trying not to IRL 😂] Jimmy: [trying not to be 😍 af because she's the cutest] Janis: face'll get stuck like that Jimmy: already stuck as 😒 Janis: exactly Janis: don't ruin it Jimmy: know how much you're into 🥺 though Jimmy: [does it] Janis: [pinching his bottom lip between her finger and thumb like she's so 😒🙄 but there's no hiding the truth hen] Jimmy: [once again running his thumb across her bottom lip because we don't need a reason] Janis: [holding his hand but squeezing it first 'cos must] Jimmy: [drawing a ! on her hand because we get it] Janis: you're Jimmy: [drawing a really slow ? as we give her a LOOK] Janis: [shaking our head, like I can't] Jimmy: [draw a 🗨 like tell me] Janis: all things considered Janis: this has been alright Jimmy: yeah Janis: I mean it Jimmy: me an' all Janis: [looking away 'cos we're so overwhelmed and 🥰] Jimmy: [kiss her because likewise] Janis: [don't hate children] Jimmy: [we know you ship it] Janis: [reminds me, Libi probably saying something so embarrassing about 'when they get married' like gal shut up but never do] Jimmy: [about to sob because they will and you can be a bridesmaid gal even though you'll be a teen by then] Janis: [so nice, 'cos Edie wouldn't have been old enough for a proper one which is sad, at least she'd start going on about hers and Bobby's so y'all don't need to feel too awks lol] Jimmy: [break my heart boo cos yeah they would've been engaged but she was but a child still so no actual wedding for y'all] Janis: [she was only 16 for like 2 months so even if Ali had agreed] Janis: [omg hang on] Janis: [what if she did 'cos like, end of the day, make your own mistakes etc and who is she to say no 'cos Cali lmao but technically Drew could be considered to have 'parental responsibility' if he's been paying which let's say he has, it seems wishy-washy but if he was like NO, 'cos just show up to do the least last minute is such a vibe for him, I think it'd count 'cos you need both parents if you have 2] Jimmy: [I love that and we must because it was like OG Cali vibes to have an underage teen wedding moment] Janis: [like so sorry do not need to be creating drama last minute in your life but also it makes sense, because as much as it's like who tf are you, it'd be conflicting because she's only wanted a dad and for him to care this whole time so] Jimmy: [soz not soz about how happy this makes me and Libi will have that wedding video to go with all the others she has] Janis: [it just makes sense that they'd try, obviously, that Ali would say yes even if she's got the reservations she has, so yeah, anyway, that's not to do with y'all lmao I just had a thought] Jimmy: [gutted this isn't Ali's caravan cos there would've been a whole dressing up box for you bubs if it were] Janis: [you can have a fake wedding when you are home lol] Jimmy: [for now make some paper doll bride and grooms that'll keep you busy] Janis: [burn that evidence, Tess is gonna be horrified, like what's this about ANOTHER teen wedding] Jimmy: [honestly this fam do make me cackle] Janis: [not enough time has passed since ruster getting married at 18 we're all triggered lmao] Jimmy: [would Edie's be before theirs or after? I get so confused] Janis: [hmm, let me think, theirs would be about 34...which is when Libi is born, so yeah, Edie is about 15 so it's the year before, 'cos obviously they get married like RIGHT before they die in 35] Janis: [talk about a YEAR for the fam, hi I'm having a baby @ 14 and hi I'm getting married to my cousin @ 18 oh and I'm also going to get pregnant] Jimmy: [we are so wild I love us] Janis: [if anyone's kids would, it is Alison's but omg, we're shooketh, not to mention we cripple Billie, then the Junior baby drama...no one getting out unscathed] Jimmy: [and now we've got jj triggering everyone and Grace out here about to also think she's a teen mum for a hot sec] Janis: [this is why everyone chats shit about y'all, but imagine the lowkey weird guilt 'cos nothing does happen to the twins really, aside from the obvious, but it's bad enough this all happens in your fam and then everyone won't shut up about it like] Janis: [also Nancy and Ava by that extension 'cos Buster embroils himself in it all and the Chloe and James of it] Jimmy: [that's why Grace is how she is guys, this fam and shit nan ruining her life lowkey] Janis: [when you can't complain 'cos it's like um well Edie's dead and Billie is crippled for life so bye, hence Janis just does as she pleases and is a bitch to everyone 'cos call her a troublemaker and whatever then, like fine, it's better than trying to deal and act like you're #grateful and #blessed] Janis: [and that's all the drama that's yet to come out, oh guys] Jimmy: [I'm gonna go re-read what I said about Jimothy's ex on the school trip because only time she's been mentioned and maybe tone that situation down depending what I've committed to because the cali fam is a LOT] Janis: [I remember the basic vibe was pregnant and with her dad's friend but yeah, go look] Jimmy: [yeah but hopefully I haven't gone in mentioning that so far and we can be like ❌] Janis: [yeah, even if it was just a lad her own age-ish and preggo now, 'cos it may have even been 2 kids and they're only 15 now so] Jimmy: [I think we've got away with implying she's a very messy bitch who has now changed her ways at least somewhat so that's fine because I don't think I've mentioned her in any of the festive convos] Janis: [we'll let you live gal] Jimmy: [anyway we've been derailed] Janis: [truly, y'all want to settle these children down again tah] Janis: 🙄🙄 Jimmy: [get in your little den bubs] Jimmy: *🥱🥱 Jimmy: 🤞🤞 Janis: Ideal Janis: just saying, not going to their wedding Jimmy: we'll be long 💀💀💀 mate, don't worry Janis: not if she makes herself a loo roll veil and has done with it Janis: poor Bobby has had no say in the matter Jimmy: ain't seen him shake his head Janis: such a romantic Jimmy: Dunno where either of 'em get that from Janis: dread to think Jimmy: no need to 💭 about owt that isn't #goals, you're alright Janis: 🤵👰💀🤢 Jimmy: don't fancy the look of your new scale much Janis: 😏 Janis: not a question I'd even fake pop, don't be 😱 Jimmy: not even if every dickhead but me 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺?! Jimmy: so 💪🏆🥇 you Janis: even if I had fuck all, you wouldn't be getting half of it Jimmy: keep your 🐕🏃💰🔐 I get it Janis: you don't whore for those tips for nothing, yeah Jimmy: in the job description, that Janis: why else would you apply Jimmy: my ☕🎨 going unappreciated in this lifetime is an #ultimatekink Janis: of course Janis: 💔 fuels your craft Jimmy: 🖋✎🖌🔪🔧🔨🪓 Janis: 🥱 to 🤤 Jimmy: massive scale that one Janis: one time speed is impressive Janis: have it Jimmy: if you ain't bringing up either of us being 🥇 at driving Janis: that aside Janis: 🏃 too Janis: not where my 🧠 was obvs Jimmy: tah for not wanting to piss off Jimmy: mine's not on 🎨 at this very minute so I ain't after the 💔 Janis: 💀💀 Jimmy: ? or ! Janis: bit of both Janis: request and an order Jimmy: come here then Janis: [a look like dare I/do I but also a LOOK obvs] Jimmy: [giving a LOOK back always] Janis: [get snuggled in this den moment best you can without disturbing the kiddos] Jimmy: [being as sneaky as we can cos don't need these kids getting extra about your rom com life again but pulling her into his lap, injury be damned because we miss it] Janis: [missed it too and our expression would say as much] Jimmy: [it's been forever like literally pub crawl was the last time] Janis: [upsetting and rude, frankly] Jimmy: [it really is, excuse you Ian] Janis: [thank god she's skinny if tall, not gonna kill you] Jimmy: [gotta do what we gotta do cos shameless fave thing ever] Janis: [just drawing doodles all over his arm with her finger] Jimmy: [playing with her hair while she does] Janis: [we're happy and that always scares us ah] Jimmy: [likewise, oh lads] Janis: [go on your phone and see about the NYE party you aren't gonna get to go to and show him like] Jimmy: [ooh good idea boo] Janis: [are we saying it's at Mia's or did I imagine that] Jimmy: [I think we did to make it more of a thing that they don't go, because we all know Mia literally never hosts a function like it's only this all year] Janis: [so it would be such a to-do for the flat whites 'cos lord knows you've not got the reps you think you have ladies] Jimmy: [yeah exactly and we know her and Pablo are over/on the rocks so she'd be even more extra about it] Janis: [thankful we miss it tbh] Jimmy: [hard same and not just cos I love the drama] Janis: [its all the drama mick, we know it'll be a terrible party but yes, rn you can plan how you're gonna slay it if you wanna] Jimmy: Go on, how are we topping 🎄 with them? Janis: already done 😇 Janis: so it'll have to be 🌟 Jimmy: I thought you were gonna say 😈 Janis: also a possibility Janis: this party is one of the only way she has of winning + at this point Janis: how do we really ruin it for - Jimmy: where's her dad? be real hell for him, this Janis: some beach in the Caribbean Janis: he couldn't miss that to continue her punishment Janis: 💔 he don't care as much as you thought, babe Jimmy: still probably won't take much to get him back Jimmy: that lass ain't had another go at a party since we fucked up hers Janis: he is with her mother so fuck knows how he manages to have a good time Janis: assumedly it's one giant swingers convention or whatever Janis: true, I wanna do it worse though Janis: more personal, just need to 💭 how Jimmy: what I'm hearing is you want me to 💀💀💀 them for you Janis: like the sound of that Jimmy: so say it and I'll do it Janis: that's how it works, yeah Jimmy: you can have owt you're after from me, you know it works like that Janis: only if we post it Jimmy: you've got my permission to hold my 📷 while I've got the 🔪 Janis: 😍 Janis: can't promise quality Jimmy: what are you promising? Janis: you know what Jimmy: don't get more top quality than 🥇 Janis: whatever you want Janis: that's what I'll give you Jimmy: I just want Janis: go on Jimmy: [kiss her please because I'm not going to let you say something extra right now] Janis: [intense silent kisses ftw rn] Jimmy: [I do hope these children are asleep because silent is not his forte for very long] Janis: [we'll give you that, as Libi has already rinsed you lol] Jimmy: [and keeps spilling all the fam tea] Janis: [gotta let you have something lads or you'll go cray] Jimmy: [and we're ruining it all for you soon] Janis: [ugh shit nan, soz not soz you're getting floored hen] Jimmy: [honestly wish it was worse cos so deserved] Janis: [as if this is the time for you to drag up Caleb's drama, like didn't even mention he had to go and get killed, like ffs] Jimmy: [hopefully Ali will ban you from the gaff because we're all sick of your shit my love] Janis: [we were humouring you to be nice but like, no] Jimmy: [the amount of chances she's already given you through the years, dread to think tbh] Janis: [we all know she gives too many, like she never banned either Caleb or Drew from seeing their kids or being involved, she's not that bitch if she doesn't have to be] Jimmy: [likewise with Joe and Ronnie, nothing if not consistent and I love you gal] Janis: [and ro lbr] Jimmy: [the tea] Janis: [oh rosaline, this do not be about you though, again, off topic] Jimmy: [I wanna say he's thought of something to ruin this party we don't get to go to because we just wanna give the bae everything she wants but I don't know what] Janis: [we can because as it won't get to come to fruition, we can be vague lol, just kissing him even harder] Jimmy: [how intensely we're doing literally everything rn because the feels are so high] Janis: ['we need to go' when you mean to the bedroom but that just comes out that dramatically lol, obviously we're whispering 'cos if you wake up now lmao] Jimmy: [try not to fall over the obstacle course of all the stuff these children have left everywhere because we all know you're gonna kiss the whole way there because forever a cliche] Janis: [as funny as that would be, one of you is injured and the other has only just recovered so be careful tah] Jimmy: [and you'd be fuming if you got cockblocked rn, we don't need another argument happening between anyone] Janis: [Cass I hope you're out or otherwise entertained 'cos yeah] Jimmy: [maybe you're asleep too tbf because we never get any at home and you've been busy having friends and living your best life] Janis: [let's go with it, we're all content] Jimmy: [hook up to your heart's content lads we'll be sending you back in the morning] Janis: [so you'll be going back 28th, just so we know where we are] Jimmy: [thank god you can work things out properly my boo] Janis: [gives us a few days to do with what we want so that's nice] Jimmy: [is there anything else on the list or have we done it all?] Janis: [the only things we have is Twix being ill and one of Asia's sisters having a bday party, we could do Twix in this period, can't really do a party between xmas and ny even they're not that dumb] Jimmy: [we should do that bday party when she gets back and things are really awkward between them because Bobby can be like I want Libi to come with me because they thing they are in love rn] Janis: [yeah, and they could fuck with Asia and when have they needed much more than a flimsy excuse so] Jimmy: [that was my thought, an excuse to get them back together that isn't just school] Janis: [think that was the plan, we can skip to when they're back if you'd like, don't think this has been that long] Jimmy: [I know we always say that but it shouldn't have actually been that long this time lol] Janis: [we alright, also back home and separated] Janis: everyone's sufficiently sure we haven't permanently damaged the kid here so 🏆 Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: Ian ain't gonna give me no 🏆 Jimmy: no longer the season Janis: and his nice act was SO convincing Jimmy: IKR Janis: 🙄 if I needed acting lessons Janis: which I don't Jimmy: you're in luck there 'cause my mum'd be the one for it putting up with his bollocks for as long as she bothered Jimmy: but about as likely as him chucking out the welcome wagon for us Janis: Shame Janis: better not tell him about the wedding Janis: 😡 🤬 all 'round Jimmy: the 💰 saver of making it a double might do something about that but with how you feel about sharing Jimmy: it'd be you fuming Janis: look like we'd hired mini-mes Jimmy: bit of a mix up with yours Janis: it happens Janis: get what you pay for 🎻 Jimmy: she's spot on with matching your ☀ personality, babe Jimmy: nowt else matters Janis: low Janis: don't compare me to a toddler 😂 Jimmy: work on her volume 🤏 and no dickhead'll know the difference Janis: you're gonna talk big now I can't do nothing about it Janis: twat Jimmy: Oi Jimmy: doing my bit so you ain't 💔 missing us Janis: very thoughtful Janis: I'll be buzzing to sleep in a proper bed on my own Jimmy: just that kind of twat, me Janis: I know Janis: how many treats he given the dog then? Jimmy: come on, none of us can count that high Jimmy: need you for that Janis: I'll have to come see you then Jimmy: won't let you 😴 heard you about wanting your own bed Janis: it's not that good, honestly Janis: but you know Jimmy: sounded alright to me, might just be the no kid 💭💡 though Janis: yeah Janis: unlucky Janis: least you won't have to make a fort every night Jimmy: depends how 💔😭🎻 he gets missing her Jimmy: might have to do all sorts of bollocks Janis: 😏 Janis: tin can phone might actually work from that distance and with her volume Jimmy: dinner and tonight's crafts ✔ Janis: caravan life makes you so resourceful Jimmy: ⛺️ next? Janis: calm down bear grylls Jimmy: only answer to daddy 🐻 or baby when you INSIST on a compromise Janis: well, baby Janis: imagine the previous 2 nights, in a tent, with no room to hide Jimmy: all of it or just the bits I wanna 💭? Janis: the bits you wanna wouldn't have a lot of hope of repeating, is my point Janis: unless yours is making dog treats was your fave Jimmy: OBVS Janis: dickhead Jimmy: time of my life that were, think about it constant, no room for nowt else but 🐕🍪 Janis: yeah, you do LOVE that dog Janis: fair enough Janis: you two go on your camping holibobs Jimmy: bit rude you're not coming, but alright Janis: no room Jimmy: loads under the ⭐s girl Janis: 🤩 Janis: tents are for pussies Jimmy: it's a yeah now then? Janis: just us? Janis: and the 🐕 Janis: bit unfair to call the kids pussies but probably more unfair to make 'em rough it like that Jimmy: reckon I'll just leave the 🐕 with our kid, so he's not as 💔😭🎻 you reckon he's not 💪😎 Jimmy: it's a 👶 an' all Janis: I never slagged him off Janis: he's alright Janis: just Jimmy: just us Janis: yeah Janis: and all the ⭐s Bill knows the names of Jimmy: he'd have me name them after all the ones I've got for you Janis: why the pricks not invited Jimmy: keep it between us that we're even going Janis: 🗢🔒 Jimmy: til we get there Jimmy: 🗨🔊 then if you want Janis: *need Janis: least we get to christen Mia's bed this party Jimmy: 🤞 we find her diary an' all Janis: can put it on the site Janis: the good bits, anyway Jimmy: trash her room since she was so chuffed the last time Janis: wonder if daddy keeps anything incriminating about the house Jimmy: he'll have an office Jimmy: dickheads who spend every minute at work always do Janis: yeah, I know the sort Janis: and keeping it locked'd be too suspicious Jimmy: piss easy Jimmy: where on the scale'll 💀👑 end up if we christen his desk an' all? Janis: I'd guess 😩 🥺 😢 😭 but we'll see 'cos I know where I am Jimmy: go on Janis: guess first Jimmy: or what? Janis: I won't tell ya Janis: play the game Jimmy: you're 😳 Janis: close Janis: 🤯 you keep having such good ideas Janis: 😣 it ain't tonight Jimmy: might have a 🥇💡 for tonight if you play nicely yourself Janis: how do I do that? Jimmy: do you need me to tell you? Jimmy: done a top job of it without that Janis: might be part of the fun Jimmy: I dunno what fun we're having yet, just that Ian'll have had an easy go of it while we were gone Janis: bet it was well hard for him to act like he gave a shit you was gone for longer Janis: plenty of ways to get to the truth of it Jimmy: can't promise you'll 👀⭐'s but there'll be 🎆🎇 Janis: I'm in Jimmy: we should be out first, dunno why I'm pissing about here when he is to chuck the kids at Janis: there is loads for Bobby to tell him Jimmy: and my sister to go on about an' all Jimmy: and there's this Jimmy: [evidence of whatever carnage Twix has caused] Janis: 🙌 Janis: told you she was on side Jimmy: [evidence of how much she's wilding because they are back and she is lowkey scared of Ian] Jimmy: Dunno about that, doing my head in already, her Janis: n'awh Janis: shut up you 💘 it Jimmy: sounds and feels right fake Janis: then you're used to it Jimmy: you coming out or what? Janis: you reckon that's how Romeo got invited up the balcony mate Jimmy: no hot chocolate included in my invite, what more to do you want, Jules? Jimmy: 🌹? Janis: yeah Janis: love 💀 things Jimmy: chuck me off the balcony then Janis: don't tease me, baby Jimmy: I mean it Janis: where do you wanna meet Jimmy: where are you? Janis: still at my grandparents so Jimmy: Alright, hang on Janis: where do you wanna go Jimmy: where do you? Janis: I don't care Jimmy: it don't matter Janis: yeah Janis: it really don't Jimmy: just don't let Libi see us Janis: I'll come out Janis: she's not taking over again tah Jimmy: I'll warm you up Janis: I'm not scared, remember Jimmy: yeah Janis: but you can Jimmy: if I don't I know what will do Janis: scare me? Jimmy: 🌡 Janis: bighead 😏 Janis: not not true though Jimmy: you and your one track 🧠 sweetheart Janis: Bill ain't invited Janis: don't need to pretend Jimmy: Oi, I've got a 🎁 for you and it ain't just 🍆🎀 Janis: what you done that for Janis: not christmas no more Jimmy: 🎅's for life Jimmy: so's pissing off Ian Janis: oh, go ahead 🍾 Jimmy: [show up boy because she's not far and hand over what you've stolen from Ian's replenished stash and I'm gonna say one of the bottles has a post it stuck to it with today's doodle which is like something to do with them stargazing obvs] Janis: [take the bottle and stick the post it on his head whilst you take a swig 'did he find his car or what' 'cos we left it somewhere then dipped so] Jimmy: [stick it on her back like excuse you it's for you when you take the bottle to take your own swig and then nearly choke cos you're loling because he hasn't because I see no reason why he would have considering where they left it and he knows nothing about Janis or where she lives] Janis: [stick it on the back of your phone or something to keep it safe, shaking our head and smirking because it's funny but also 'what's your long term plan?'] Jimmy: [shrugs 'depends' like it's so casual and we don't think about how much we hate Ian constantly lol] Janis: ['yeah, depends if he takes it to the police' kicking a stone as we walk 'we'd both be seen in it on CCTV' shrugs 'you probably want to return it or make sure someone worse takes it now'] Jimmy: ['he's not that kind of dickhead' because he isn't lbr 'he can have it back before he's in work again, don't need him hanging about having a longer holiday'] Janis: [nods like good 'glad you have a plan' and a look like NEVER had one of them before lollol] Jimmy: [a look like are you because we know we're all thinking about if this plan works and he has to leave] Janis: [shrugging it off 'not getting arrested for you' and quickening our step so we're a beat ahead] Jimmy: [💔 mime before she gets ahead of us and lighting a 🚬 when she is] Janis: ['bit rude' when you're not offered one immediately] Jimmy: [pull her back a step like it was rude of you to walk off and so you can light one for her in a saucy and intimate manner] Janis: [this 😒😣 truly I shan't elaborate] Jimmy: [a look like what even though we know] Janis: [taking the bottle back like that's what] Jimmy: [writes a ? in the condensation on the bottle because we like being annoying] Janis: [rubs it out and uses said condensation to draw a cross on his forehead] Jimmy: [that's cold and ticklish so we gotta retaliate by putting our forehead to hers OBVS even though we literally could have done a million other things] Janis: [the effort of NOT kissing him right now just to prove a point] Jimmy: [when you could just kiss her but you want her to do it so you're just doing the thing where you pull her closer to you even though you're already close af] Janis: [can't even LOOK at him you're that close, just this bottle between 'em] Jimmy: [you can lick your lips though boy and you shall] Janis: [bite your own like how dare you] Jimmy: [pull her hair like how dare YOU and also to bring her even closer] Janis: [noise between a gasp and you know what] Jimmy: [getting one back always] Janis: ['why'd you have to-' but interrupting ourself to kiss him finally] Jimmy: [have an intense makeout sesh for a bit] Janis: [idk where you are randomly in the street tis the season] Jimmy: [they blatantly are and I love that for you] Janis: [always the vibe, always the mood] Jimmy: [trying to think of somewhere you could go even though neither of you actually care] Janis: [oh the places you can't go when you're a teen or lowkey ever, just chillin'] Jimmy: [would love if there was somewhere you could go 'camping' for a little moment but idk] Janis: [there's always the park but yeah literally idk where else] Jimmy: [everywhere else would probably be a trek sadly] Janis: [maybe you can go cali house way, there's ample camping space there but probably not tonight luvs] Jimmy: [put a pin in that dream] Janis: [emotions too high rn] Jimmy: [rn and forever tbh] Janis: [we're not okay but also the best we've been in forever, very confusing lmao] Jimmy: [we know he's in exactly the same boat and that's why you are #fated] Janis: [what a time] Janis: [you should probably have to go properly home at some point tonight gal] Jimmy: [can't avoid it forever we haven't moved you in yet] Janis: [and you have been gone since boxing day so your mother would kinda exist hen] Jimmy: [yeah exactly and you don't hate her as much now she's a sassy single mum so] Janis: [yeah we're not thrilled by it all but we are gonna be running away soon so we'll give you a hot sec fam] Jimmy: [you can't be together always lads it's too dangerous because of all the shit we can't let you say] Janis: [plus Junie hasn't made an appearance this year so you all have to go a bit harder than normal soz] Jimmy: [that whole shitshow is very fresh] Janis: [mhmm, it's very recent lmao, and Caleb and honestly Edie, oh the mess, god sake shit nan why] Jimmy: [we're all struggling, not to mention we said that Carly died around this time of year so Ali really doesn't need this shit nan] Janis: [sad times all round honey] Jimmy: [remind me to decide when Jimothy's mum went missing in terms of that anniversary because I've not] Janis: [noted] Janis: [enjoy that bus gal] Janis: 👋 Jimmy: 👍 Janis: 🤖 Jimmy: if the driver ain't human, it ain't me you wanna be telling Janis: you with your facebook ma 👍 Janis: the driver is deffo human, can smell him from here Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: might be trying to get a lift to anywhere Janis: not quite the midnight train Jimmy: can't be bothered to wait that long Janis: let me know how anywhere is Jimmy: no need Jimmy: you can have the 👎 now Janis: oh, it is you Janis: 😒 Jimmy: who else were you after? Janis: checking you weren't 🤖 Janis: or 👵 Jimmy: 👴 Jimmy: soz to 💔 you Janis: why would that 💔 me Janis: my type, no Jimmy: you've had to piss off, for a start Janis: I'll survive Janis: have to pick up all the farmyard critters your brother ordered anyway Jimmy: tah for that Janis: you're welcome Janis: 🤠 Jimmy: 🤞 there's no room left for Ian Janis: maybe in the shed Janis: if he's lucky Jimmy: the trampoline's a good shout Janis: 🤔 might be too much fun Jimmy: with his back? Nah mate 🎻🎻 Janis: 😂 Janis: least he doesn't have the 👵 bladder Jimmy: he's welcome that we keep nicking his stash Janis: I appreciated my gift Janis: even if it weren't 🍆🎀 Jimmy: far as street corners go, didn't reckon that one were 💰💰 Janis: I weren't gonna tip you Jimmy: 👵👜💰 Janis: she was not gonna get involved Janis: watch, maybe Jimmy: that's what I said Jimmy: different street maybe Janis: well it's pretty rude you can't perform without a big audience Jimmy: never said that Janis: hmm Jimmy: weren't asking for a review either but alright Janis: not giving one don't worry Jimmy: it's the fans who'll be dead relieved Janis: that we don't hoe it up on street corners? Janis: as they weren't there with 📱s out, probably Jimmy: that and you don't reckon I'm always ready to perform Janis: I'd never say that Jimmy: you did Janis: not to the fans Jimmy: you're alright, not my own biggest one Janis: yeah right Janis: your head is the the only one to maybe rival mine in size Jimmy: don't sound like me, that Jimmy: dunno which 👵 or 🤖 you're on about Janis: you aren't shy Jimmy: you got a scale for that an' all? Janis: 😶🤐😬🙃😲😁😩🤮 Janis: something like that Jimmy: 👏👏🌹 Janis: I know you're 😁 Janis: but I'll 🤐 Jimmy: you Janis: you reckon? Jimmy: duh Janis: pretty nice Janis: could've gone 😲 Jimmy: still time for you to change my mind if you're that 💔 Janis: you like calling me scared, is all Janis: I'd go for 🙃 Janis: very dead in the eyes Jimmy: 👍's a bit strong Janis: yeah, it's an exclusive list Jimmy: obvs your 👀 are on it Janis: just my eyes? Jimmy: you reckon I never answer questions, what makes you think I'll do that one? Janis: miss 100% the shots you don't take, babe Janis: worth one, like Jimmy: I get it, you miss your coach and teammates Janis: coach is a bit much for the PE teacher who oversees all the girl's teams Janis: but whatever fantasy you're having, go off Jimmy: it's your 💭💕 Janis: fuck off is it Jimmy: SUCH a #lad I only know about 🥤 shots Janis: we're pretending you're a jock now Janis: okay, catching up Janis: 📸❌ Jimmy: Bill will be fuming if we start performing Grease Janis: such a snob Janis: loves the limelight way too much, that one Jimmy: you'll have to picture me in short shorts on your own time Janis: when I'm not thinking about my teammates, I'll give it a 💭💕 Jimmy: brb 💭 about the wrestling bit of the montage 🤼💕 Janis: pervert Jimmy: 😘 Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: Oi, what happened to whatever fantasy I were having, crack on? Janis: I can't help not being a lesbian Janis: you'll have to keep it in your head, won't you Jimmy: UGH fine Janis: you're such a twat Jimmy: SO complimentary today, you Janis: yeah, warn me if you want to screenshot and I'll bother Jimmy: 👌 Janis: Whatever Janis: talk to you later Jimmy: in a bit then Janis: cool Jimmy: is it? Janis: 'course Janis: I've got nothing to say about this bus, you're chatting shit Jimmy: bit rude Janis: is it? Jimmy: how isn't it? Janis: Some things my one track mind ain't interested in Jimmy: meaning what? Janis: just stop taking the piss Jimmy: alright Janis: sorry, I'm not in the mood Jimmy: What's wrong? Janis: just Janis: the lesbian shit Janis: I know you were joking but don't Jimmy: It's my homoerotic scene not yours, you're not Danny Zuko, soz girl Janis: alright, foreign exchange student Jimmy: I'm not into firing shots that'll actually wound you Jimmy: blanks are 👴 perks Janis: alright Janis: let you off then Jimmy: 🤞? Jimmy: no point you being fuming if I can't see how fit you look Janis: going home is shit Janis: know you already have Jimmy: I've not Janis: you've not? Jimmy: there's every point Ian being fuming and he won't be if I'm about to 🐕🏃 or babysit Janis: where are you gonna go Janis: for the forseeable Jimmy: what kind of question is that? Janis: Come on Janis: I wouldn't have gone yet Janis: if you'd said Jimmy: that'll be why I didn't Janis: you're going to be bored Janis: and cold Jimmy: I'm northern Janis: now I seem like a total dick, right Jimmy: you went 'cause you had to Janis: least all the pubs are open Jimmy: 🍻 Jimmy: I'll find some 👴 mates Janis: yeah Janis: you will, right Janis: or go church, ALWAYS open, you know Jimmy: Jesus IS my BFF Janis: exactly Janis: keep you warm Jimmy: bit of 🙏'll do that Janis: ah, the homoeroticism strikes again Jimmy: nowt warmer than hell fire, babe Janis: I'll see you there still Janis: loads of ways to get in Jimmy: alright, but I only wanna see you if you recreate your angel outfit Janis: 😈 is a fallen angel Janis: he'll allow it Jimmy: chuffed to bits to know he'll be a fan Jimmy: loads of ours won't make it down Janis: they lack the imagination Janis: 💔 Jimmy: what they lack would be a massive list Jimmy: I'd bother telling you what else I like before I did them bulletpoints Janis: 🥧🍺🥔👀 Janis: I can keep up Jimmy: ain't you who's illiterate Janis: welcome for the pictures Janis: you can give me one more, for being nice Jimmy: 🚬 Janis: copout but fine Janis: add it to the list Jimmy: you never said it had to be one you didn't know Janis: didn't say it was a cheat Janis: just a bit...lazy? rude? idk Jimmy: I dunno what emoji I would do for what you smell like without making it weird 1. 👃? 2. 🐽? Janis: can't believe the emoji library has let you down like this Janis: 🐽 is cuter, less creepy, anyway Jimmy: there you go then Janis: I'll add it to the list Janis: I could just use 🚬 for you, that's what you smell like Jimmy: can't say I don't do owt to give you an easier go of it Janis: bit of a stretch to blame/gift your addiction to me but yeah Jimmy: but more romantic Janis: that is what's important here Janis: what do I smell like, now I'm worried Janis: at least you like it Jimmy: if I could narrow it down I'd have done Jimmy: you're not a vape Janis: nicest thing you've ever said to me? 🤔 Janis: 😍 🥰 😘 Jimmy: 😂 Janis: you really are great at this romance shit Jimmy: tah for not being 🍭🍨🍦🧁🍰🎂 it means loads to me an' all Janis: wouldn't be able to live with myself, tbh Jimmy: wouldn't be able to die with you Janis: 😷😷😷 Janis: ruin the ending, 👻 FUMING Jimmy: I'll tell him to take it up with 🚬 for only fucking your sense of taste Janis: there goes that sponsorship Jimmy: *🤐 Janis: I was doing great work saying how fit of a smell it was Janis: ffs Jimmy: Where? Janis: I put it on my list, duh Jimmy: said you could not that you did Janis: there you go then Jimmy: say it then Janis: I like the way you smell too Janis: and there should be a less creepy way to say it, you're right Jimmy: 🗨 can still stay on the list, not that you've even remembered it Janis: I've not forgotten it Janis: just doubt you like it as much as 🥔 for example Jimmy: what's it that I'm doing now? Jimmy: bit rude to doubt me Janis: I'm not a good conversationalist, not something I've got an ego about Jimmy: it's my list, dickhead, not yours Janis: but you're 🗨 about 🗨 to me Jimmy: and I'm 🗨 I rate it Jimmy: you don't get a say in what I like, we're not 👰💍🤵 Janis: I just don't believe you Janis: but that don't matter Jimmy: why? Janis: s'your list, like you said Jimmy: why don't you believe me? Janis: 'cos I never know what to say, I told you Jimmy: so you manage to say the right things without knowing Jimmy: that's 🏆 Janis: only when they've been written for me Jimmy: it were you who said she's a more boring version of you Jimmy: you know that's not when I mean Janis: 🤐 Jimmy: I like talking to you, I said it ages ago and I'm still going on about it now so there's something in that Jimmy: 💀💀💀🐴 Janis: alright, alright Janis: I'll believe you mean it Jimmy: that's 3 things about you you've had off the list, so I will shut up now, like Janis: I'm not giving your 2 IOUs Janis: not fair Jimmy: so just tell me now Janis: I'm 💭 Jimmy: don't hurt yourself Jimmy: I get it's WELL difficult Janis: Shut up Janis: I don't want you accusing me of copying you, is all Janis: I like your voice, that's different from 🗨 Jimmy: 🥇🎤 me Jimmy: goes without 🗨 the accent is an' all Janis: I'm not 🤤 'cos you're English Janis: make me sound like them Janis: but Janis: I like not loads of other cunts have heard it Jimmy: none of 'em have, my customer service voice isn't how I 🗨 or any other dickhead really does Janis: ✨ so special, me Jimmy: my sister and Ian don't wanna talk to me and our kid can't with 🗨 so you're basically it Jimmy: when Libi ain't shouting over you Jimmy: but don't let your head get too massive, can't have you stuck on that 🚍 Janis: 🎈📌 Janis: promise Jimmy: I'd have to swap uniforms and 🚒🪓 you out Jimmy: what a ball ache Janis: more cliche too Janis: no one actually wants to fuck the police Janis: gotta keep it niche Jimmy: go on then, is that your last ✔? Janis: that's only 2, I'm not adding your real/fake persona, soz 👮 Janis: alright, as you went 👀 I'll go 💋 Jimmy: fuming that you'd make me wanna kiss YOU when giving ME a compliment but alright Janis: we're both well kissable, that's fair to say Janis: ask the fans Jimmy: shh I'm 💭 and I don't want any of them twats popping up Janis: 😶 Janis: oops, defeats the point a bit Jimmy: you're alright, I control the 🔊 in my head, I'll put you on proper loud Janis: I'd add that to my list but then you'd owe me Janis: not very 😇 Jimmy: you'll have to be 😈 Janis: your 🔊 then Jimmy: for a start Janis: I'm not going to put my own on my list Jimmy: spoilsport Janis: there can be crossover Jimmy: I already know you like the 🔊 I can get you to, so don't worry if 🚬 were a copout that is Janis: you can't claim eyes forever Janis: or I'll just list all the good stuff now and you'll be well fucked Jimmy: not that long of a 🚍 ride Janis: contrary to what you reckon Janis: not that hard to think up the shit I like Jimmy: do it then Jimmy: I'm not 🙀🙀🙀 Janis: you might float away Janis: if you're still out Jimmy: got nowt else on or anywhere else to be Jimmy: 🎈 sounds decent enough Janis: 🤡 Jimmy: Dunno if I'm chuffed or gutted you didn't go for 🐘 Janis: trust you Jimmy: well you being a better 🤹 ain't going on the list Jimmy: fuming Janis: you're still good with your hands Janis: just different way Janis: 🖕✌️🤟 Jimmy: I Jimmy: wish you were here sounds like we're still at the 🏖 and I'm 🖋 a postcard but Janis: you can draw me one Janis: wish I had something to do that weren't wistfully staring out of windows but Jimmy: 👴 flirting Janis: they are pretty saucy, you know Jimmy: never heard anyone use saucy since before I ⚰👻 so tah for that, Judith Jimmy: racy is another one I miss 👴💔 Jimmy: #thegoodoldcourtingdays Janis: 🏹 to please Janis: and I know my audience Jimmy: 🎯 Janis: 💘 Jimmy: you had me at getting your MASSIVE ankle out Janis: oi, my ankle is perfectly normal now, don't try and trick me into sending you such a scandalous picture Jimmy: 😏 Jimmy: proof's in the 📷 you set yourself up for that Janis: 😱 but my reputation! Jimmy: 🦶 size matters, my dear Janis: [obviously sends a picture with all sorts of pisstakey emojis and bants] Janis: dainty, I think you'll find Jimmy: [obviously sends a 😍 af selfie back which isn't even that pisstakey because we are feeling that rn and always] Janis: You're indecent Jimmy: can be if you like Jimmy: there's nobody else at the park Janis: how long do you want my list to be Jimmy: how long is it now? Janis: embarrassingly long Jimmy: can't have that Jimmy: needs to be so long you're past caring about 😳 Janis: what will I do when you fuck of 🎈 Jimmy: come with Janis: alright Janis: we'll work on your list some more and see Jimmy: alright Janis: your ❌🍆s to give thing makes the list easy though Janis: just FYI Jimmy: you're welcome Janis: you probably wanna avoid being that guy at the park though Janis: if I'm there, different vibe Jimmy: you heard there's no 👀 or 👂 Jimmy: you'd have to be the one reporting me Janis: I need you with me too bad to do that Janis: I don't need bars between us as well as distance, like Janis: even Bill didn't go there Jimmy: The antlers are long gone, even if the 🎵's live on in my 🧠 Jimmy: no reindeer games that involve a jailbreak, I promise Janis: Shame Janis: how are you going to top your festive #lewks? Jimmy: 🤔🤔 Jimmy: nowt but full body glitter? Janis: 😏 Janis: sounds itchy Jimmy: 💀👑 not have a pool? 💔🎻🎻 Jimmy: SUCH a letdown Janis: 💡 Janis: have to ask Janis: clog the filters right up Jimmy: hot tub'll do IF IT HAS TO but it don't have the #drama Bill's after Janis: she's definitely got one of them Janis: sti soup that it is 🤢 Jimmy: really painted a picture for me there Jimmy: might just leave the ✨ on so she knows where I've been Janis: imagine how many secretaries have been disappointed in there Janis: not to mention the lads not quite swallowed whole Janis: not going to be unnoticed, I guess Janis: shine on Jimmy: Dunno if I wanna 💭 Jimmy: more tragic than owt Bill's ever written Janis: #bonerkiller Janis: she's 💔🎻🎻 daddy could ever be anything less than 💯 as well Jimmy: 🤞 he sends her a postcard, can't wait to nick that off the fridge Janis: so hot when you're mean Jimmy: 😏 Jimmy: not even started yet, baby Jimmy: didn't reckon on being chuffed to bits for her party but Janis: I know Janis: should thank us Janis: no one has ever been this buzzing Jimmy: except those lads when they realised they'd FINALLY 💀💀💀 Janis: you're special, babe Janis: not everyone likes it like you Jimmy: don't put that on your list Jimmy: makes me sound like a twat Janis: if I did it'd make me sound like a psychopath so Janis: 🤐 Jimmy: least we ain't made a list of the other dickheads we want to die Jimmy: length of it would be a nightmare Janis: and we're looking for less attention, not more Janis: school therapist can do one if she wants to chat Jimmy: bit rude she ain't introduced herself to me, been here ages struggling with this bloody paddy language barrier Janis: how dare she not want to start an inappropriate relationship with you Janis: Lucas doing all the heavy lifting for her 😤 Jimmy: am I losing my new boy ✨ or what? 😱 Janis: her cardigan collection means she's either celibate or a massive lesbian so Janis: you're still so ✨ I SWEAR Jimmy: Why not both? #dontlimityourselflove Jimmy: OH THANK GOD Janis: read that as #doityourselflove so, yeah Janis: must be what she's up to in her office, bless Jimmy: Be Lucas in detention an' all Jimmy: will have spent the hol practicing with them new ties so he's ready to go Janis: you better be here Janis: or my trauma is on your hands Jimmy: can't have that Jimmy: plays right into the hands of that gay therapist Jimmy: you don't know it weren't her spreading those rumours Janis: make sense Janis: did turn her down last time Janis: doubt she works commission for every fucked up kid she 'helps' Jimmy: I'll be here to save you, Joanne Janis: Ian don't move fast Janis: I've noticed Jimmy: he's got the 🐕 and 👶s to bring him 🍺🥧🥔 when there's no Sharon, no need to move Janis: so what's your next step Jimmy: body in the boot when I bring the car back? Janis: his or john/jane doe Jimmy: Sharons obvs Janis: duh Janis: we're framing him Janis: okay, where's she hang out Jimmy: depends Janis: when she ain't photocopying things Jimmy: she's always photocopying her tits, full time job, that Jimmy: what it depends on is which Sharon you mean Jimmy: but probably find any of them in the hair dye aisle Janis: all of 'em at once Janis: like confused blonde gazelles Janis: *blonde, with bad roots and tell-tell greys 😱 Janis: have to stack 'em up Jimmy: 😂 Janis: not a list, technically Janis: Sharon x ??? Jimmy: be weird seeing their real names in all the papers Janis: for your dad too Janis: can pin them on his cell wall Jimmy: Dunno what he calls 'em Jimmy: @ him Janis: I'm not sure I need to 💭 Jimmy: 🙀🙀🙀 Janis: bit late for the christmas card Jimmy: crack on drafting your new year's text Janis: Dear future father in law Janis: terrified Jimmy: *daddy in law Janis: 😂 Janis: even better Jimmy: do they not make new years cards? 💔 missing something if it's not 🖋🩸 Janis: you send the text before the rush hun Jimmy: oh tah, I'll make sure our kid gets on the tin can 📞 proper early Janis: yeah, little socialite will be well busy Jimmy: got a wedding to plan if nowt else Janis: don't tell him it's her 4th Jimmy: he'd never stop 😭😭 Jimmy: I'll 📞 him now, let Ian sort that Janis: nursery gets wild, what can she say Jimmy: gutted she can't come to the party 💀👑'd never survive her review Janis: 💔 Janis: have to arrange a play date Janis: 💀👑 n #2'd keel over 🤞 Jimmy: I'll stick in it the group chat Janis: make sure you make it clear there'll be kids there Janis: don't want them to die of excitement before we can do it ourselves Jimmy: 👍 Janis: not playing with them Janis: can't make me Jimmy: could but I won't Jimmy: you're my best mate, they ain't having you Janis: 😳 Janis: can I put that on the list Jimmy: do you want to? Janis: yeah Jimmy: so there's your answer Janis: what emoji means BFFs Jimmy: 🤝? 🤗? Janis: 🤝 Janis: I don't know what that other fucker is doing Jimmy: looks like when dickheads mime they're being kissed, do you know what I mean? Janis: well, we aren't THOSE kind of friends Jimmy: what sort are we? Janis: strictly 🤝 professional Janis: don't get any ideas Janis: so friendzoned Jimmy: alright Janis: 😂 Janis: is it? Jimmy: have to be now you've said, won't it? Janis: not necessarily Janis: what kind of friends do you think we are? Jimmy: I weren't planning to stick a post it on your head Janis: might help you remember my name Jimmy: I know your name, Juliet Jimmy: dunno what you're on about Janis: mhmm Janis: my mistake Jimmy: not as thick as I look, remember Janis: I know Janis: mates, remember Jimmy: 🥇🤝 Janis: ✨ Jimmy: you gonna wear them for the party an' all? Janis: couple outfit!!1 Janis: I don't know Janis: it's gonna be all LBDs and sparkles so Janis: got to do better Jimmy: question is, shopping trip or crafting session? Janis: I've had enough crafting for one holiday Jimmy: thought you were gonna say one life Janis: and 😢 you like that? Janis: not very nice Jimmy: being nice I were about to offer to take you 🛍 after work Janis: yeah? Janis: 😇 boy Jimmy: never said I'd 💰 for owt Jimmy: steady on Janis: duh Janis: don't need money Jimmy: 😈 then Janis: we can pretend Janis: you will be sick of using your customer service 🔊😁 Jimmy: already am Janis: I'll come in a bit early Janis: you can talk to me properly Jimmy: you're being too nice now Janis: that a no? Jimmy: it's a what do you want? Janis: 😈 Jimmy: go on Janis: tell me when you're off and you'll see if I turn up early or on time Jimmy: [a time] Janis: sorted Jimmy: what about about now? Janis: what could I possibly do that was 😈 now Janis: 🤔 Jimmy: you're right, no chance of topping the 🦶📷 Janis: that kind of shameless reverse psychology will always work Janis: hold on Jimmy: don't need to be a school therapist Janis: bringing her up ain't gonna get you anything 🔥 Jimmy: if you can't give me owt 🔥 when you're under it from any bollocks going, what kind of muse are you? 💔 Janis: you get what you give, dickhead Jimmy: [gives her something 🔥🔥 obvs] Janis: [more risque pic back than last time, idk the scale but one up from whatever we did before] Jimmy: alright, I take back what I said Janis: you better Jimmy: ❌ Janis: 👍 Jimmy: should've said you were so 🏆 I'd have offered to lend you my 📷 before the killing spree Janis: I prefer when you take them Jimmy: that going on the list? Janis: I don't know if I'm that comfortable with the spotlight Janis: but you make me look alright Jimmy: nowt to do with me Jimmy: how you look Janis: nah, but I don't immediately wanna hide or flip you off so Janis: take it Jimmy: gutted 🖕💕 Janis: [pic of] Janis: anything for you, dearest Jimmy: 😍😍😍😍 Jimmy: there she is Janis: not been mugged by some random slag Jimmy: bit awkward I were so into it if you were Janis: yeah, she'll be fuming if she ever finds out Jimmy: our secret Janis: fuck off Janis: supposed to say I could never get mugged 'cos I'm so 💪 Jimmy: I dunno how many fake muggers there were, mate Janis: don't matter Janis: GOD Jimmy: were he there an' all? bit rude of him not to help you out Jimmy: such a good catholic lass Janis: he helps those whole help themselves Janis: and you might be friends now but known me longer so he'll definitely let me smack you Jimmy: wouldn't stop you myself, how could I when you're THAT 💪🏆🥇 Janis: 😒 Janis: shush Jimmy: walking wounded, me Jimmy: about to turn into a ⛄ Janis: stop it Janis: focus on finding a decent pub Jimmy: without you as my sat nav? Janis: why'd you let me go dickhead Janis: I'm mad Jimmy: why'd you have to? Jimmy: there's your answer Janis: they'd all survive Janis: I don't care Jimmy: I'll live Janis: yeah Jimmy: don't be pissed off at me Jimmy: 🤗🤗🤗 Janis: do what you like, mate Jimmy: *🥺🥺🥺 Janis: you're so annoying, you know Jimmy: I'll go back when you have, it's 🥇🤝 of me or some bollocks Janis: don't go back 'til you want to Janis: just do something that ain't freezing to death, tah Janis: I get why you don't wanna be there Jimmy: never ain't an option Jimmy: and the park's nice, loads of 🏆💭 Janis: okay Janis: that's true Janis: what you can remember Jimmy: that you offering to fill in the gaps or what? Janis: I don't know what you and don't 💭 Jimmy: could just tell me what you do, for a start Janis: could do Jimmy: so? Janis: we first went there after we ruined that bitch's shit party, yeah Jimmy: with half the other dickheads who left Jimmy: for a bit Janis: right, but no one's got any stamina so then it was just us Jimmy: feels like ages ago Jimmy: but all our 🎨's still here Janis: I remember that Janis: and it pissed it down, like school trip Janis: weird how it wasn't long ago at all, actually Jimmy: 🚫🌨 Janis: not festive but Jimmy: you were 🥶🥶 any road, I remember that Jimmy: had to chuck you a jacket Janis: you insisted, I remember Janis: as per Jimmy: don't sound like me, that Jimmy: don't think you do 💭 Janis: was one of the many other lads I take there, was it? Jimmy: or all them sonnets Bill's got you bothering with Janis: if that's as far as your 💭 goes Jimmy: if that's as far as my memory goes, what? Janis: you don't remember as much as I do Jimmy: never said it were Janis: go on then Jimmy: I said sorry for being 😒 and having my own personal 🌧 over my head the way I would if you were really pissed off with me now Janis: what a nightmare Janis: making you say sorry all the time Jimmy: *not enough of the time Janis: not the kind of mate I'm trying to be Jimmy: why not? Janis: bit naggy Janis: bit more stepmum energy, that Jimmy: that weren't your reaction how I remember it Jimmy: might just be that the Sharons have done a shit job at giving out the right #energy Janis: I know it weren't Janis: weren't that drunk that night, if at all Jimmy: bit busy sorting that lass out for trying to make you look a twat Janis: n trying to hop on your dick, yeah Jimmy: that's every lass Janis: no need to flex, I've heard, like Jimmy: no need to 1. make it about me when it were about you 2. call me a lightweight Janis: 1. everything is about me, far as you're concerned baby 💕 2. clearly not as your 🧠 so clear Jimmy: clearly were saying you dunno what I do or don't remember a bit ago when you reckon you barely drank owt Janis: maybe you've got a shit memory Janis: not gonna assume nothing Jimmy: 👴💔 Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: what? Janis: you're being irritating again Janis: what's your point? Jimmy: how am I? Janis: I don't know, just being pedantic and saying shit you know I'm not saying Jimmy: bollocks Janis: this is what I mean Janis: what's wrong, just come out with it Jimmy: nowt's wrong with me, I dunno what you mean Janis: alright Jimmy: 👍 Janis: rewind then Janis: before you were using emojis solely to chat Jimmy: before we met's a bit far, Judith Janis: well they ain't my idea Janis: 💃💅🛍😘☕🍸💖 Janis: #inspo Jimmy: I get it, you want full verses Jimmy: hang on Jimmy: [writes her a decent poem cos just that bitch] Janis: where'd you steal that from Janis: I can't find it on google Jimmy: you won't Jimmy: it's from my 🧠 Janis: just now? Jimmy: sound more surprised, dickhead Jimmy: you chucked me loads of #inspo Janis: I am, sorry, like Janis: how do you do that Jimmy: what? Janis: say such Janis: 🤯 things Jimmy: just pissing about, me Janis: it's a skill Janis: you could use it for evil Janis: if you wanted Jimmy: have used it for 💰 Jimmy: at my school before Janis: yeah? Janis: 👏 Jimmy: no dickhead's gone above 🥔 prints Jimmy: had to do something to make it less grim Janis: you and your 🎨 temperament Janis: should do it here Janis: 💰s a 💰 Jimmy: massive language barrier Jimmy: don't 🗨 paddy Janis: gutted Janis: I'd help but Janis: need emotions and shit for that Jimmy: to proofread? Janis: yeah Janis: ❓❗ me Jimmy: nowt but going over it with a green 🖋 is it? Janis: depends how 💕 these notes are gonna be Jimmy: depends how 💰 they are Janis: so you'll do homework as well, sick notes? Jimmy: homework's a bit far Jimmy: unless it's about Bill obvs Janis: obvs Janis: you should do it Janis: you piss it out easy, evidenced loads of times Jimmy: know how to piss out a website and ads an' all, tah sir Jimmy: it's like he knew Janis: what a babe Janis: guardian 😇 Janis: don't put it on 💀👑 site, be a dead giveaway Jimmy: she'd have me doing 💌 for daddy Jimmy: talk about piss easy 😍🤤🤤 Jimmy: xoxo 👻 boy Janis: keep it professional, babe Janis: she'll never pay if you sound as thirsty as you do Jimmy: she'd never pay Janis: 😏 cold dead hands Jimmy: would need your 💪 Janis: I'd LOVE to fuck her up Jimmy: not just her, any twat who's 💰 shy Janis: you reckon I'll be 😢? Jimmy: *😁 Janis: exactly Janis: ☁team Jimmy: SUCH a ☀ you Jimmy: 💔 you're not here Janis: how cold are you? Jimmy: how northern am I? Janis: stubborn* Janis: pretty damn stubborn Jimmy: *💪 Jimmy: VERY is right Janis: I won't disagree Janis: everyone's 👀 Jimmy: 😏 Janis: it's rude Jimmy: why? Janis: I can't look at you ALL the time Jimmy: can if you want Janis: can't right now Jimmy: 📷 Janis: but then the second problem becomes the first Jimmy: ? Janis: can't touch you Jimmy: you've got your perfect 💭 recall from when you did Janis: have to do Jimmy: I'll 🏃 Jimmy: race the 🚍 back Janis: very classics Janis: bit after Bill's time but he's down Jimmy: are you? Janis: you know I miss you Jimmy: not what I asked Janis: it'd keep you warm Jimmy: not for long if your mum won't have me through the door Janis: she's got loads of kids, won't notice one more Janis: you can come, if you wanna Jimmy: alright Janis: I want you too Jimmy: then I'll be there in a bit Jimmy: he'll be chuffed to have his car again Janis: yeah Janis: wanna take it for one last ride though Jimmy: what kind of question is that? Janis: I know Janis: redundant Jimmy: I get it, you just wanna hear it from me Janis: naturally Jimmy: it's a yeah, never not a yeah to you Janis: 💀 me Jimmy: as promised Janis: s'all I want Jimmy: so slowly, so painfully Janis: shit Jimmy: if you can't feel the whole 🔪 we'll just have another go Janis: death by a thousand cuts might seem a bit ambitious Janis: but I've got trust in you Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt baby Janis: you are Jimmy: you Janis: but you Jimmy: you heard me Jimmy: you're Janis: you're more Janis: whatever you were going to say Jimmy: that's just you Jimmy: more than I can 🗨 Janis: but you make me feel so Jimmy: I should be fuming that you make me feel owt but there's no room for bollocks like that Janis: yeah Janis: like, I should care, be careful Janis: but I don't and I can't Jimmy: fuck it Jimmy: nowt matters but this Janis: fuck it Janis: if you're alright with it, so am I Jimmy: you're all I want Janis: then I'm yours Jimmy: 💀💀💀 Jimmy: I've got no words for what that felt like Janis: but 👍 not 👎 Janis: yeah? Jimmy: like the twist of a 🔪 Jimmy: 🥇👍 Janis: good Janis: you're welcome Jimmy: I'll never get there if you keep being so Janis: It's hard being quiet when there's so much I could say to make you Janis: but I will Jimmy: it's hard being quiet Janis: you don't have to be, do you? Jimmy: not the one on a packed 🚍 but Janis: I've got loads of practice Jimmy: I'm not putting it on my list but take your 🏆 Janis: you don't have to Janis: when we get to mine, there's places we can be as loud as we want Jimmy: okay Janis: warm, comfortable places Janis: don't worry Jimmy: Oi Janis: I know, you're VERY 💪 and even more Northern Janis: but I want you to feel comfortable before I kill you Jimmy: don't be making out that owt worries me but how fucking far into the middle of nowt you live Janis: I know, it's very inconvenient Janis: miss his car, like Jimmy: why didn't I just come with you? fuck's sake Janis: same reasons I didn't stay with you Jimmy: 🥇💡 us Janis: Don't tell the fans Janis: so disappointed Jimmy: far as they know we're never apart Janis: if only, babes Jimmy: 💭🥺 Janis: I am more bored Janis: when you aren't about Jimmy: that it? Jimmy: the full scale of your feelings Janis: shh Jimmy: you're less 😳 when I'm not about Jimmy: greatest 💔 this town's ever had to go through Janis: if anyone wants to disagree I'll 🥺 at them Jimmy: What kind of dickhead would dare? It's the sort of 🎨 that ain't subjective, soz Janis: you'll have to let 'em know Jimmy: 📢 OI Janis: 😂 just like that Jimmy: know what I'm doing, me Janis: you don't need to tell me Janis: but I am going to need you to show me again, like right fucking now please Jimmy: seeing as you were so polite about it, my dear Jimmy: what can I do for you right fucking now? Janis: just Janis: tell me you feel it too Janis: how much you wish I was there, or you was here Jimmy: I feel it Jimmy: the fans aren't the only dickheads 🤞 we were together all the time Janis: not my fault everyone else is shit Jimmy: 🤏 your fault you're not but Janis: you're not even meant to be here Jimmy: 👻 barely am, it's alright Janis: no it's not Janis: but I don't care Jimmy: it is, we can just Janis: just Jimmy: stick together Janis: yeah Jimmy: 🤝 Janis: 🤝 Janis: makes sense Jimmy: good Jimmy: how much I like having you about is too much of a copout for the list Janis: when you're gone Janis: be more of a test Janis: always about now, like Jimmy: we're going together so ⚰ budge up dickhead Janis: shared enough single beds with you to manage Jimmy: might wanna stretch out a bit for the afterlife Janis: double plot?! 😱🥴 Janis: can only dream Jimmy: 👑 Janis: chuck ourselves off the same bridge, loads of room to swim about Jimmy: 🧜🏽 Janis: know I beat you so bad boxing day but it's okay Janis: can't drown once you're 💀 Jimmy: bollocks did you Jimmy: could've broken all my ribs and I'd still 🏆 Janis: the fact you've brought up your handicap speaks 🔊 Jimmy: of how 💪🥇 I am Janis: 👌 Jimmy: you're done being nice now, I get it Jimmy: 🦈 Janis: you don't like it when I'm nice really Jimmy: don't I? Janis: nah Janis: do you? Jimmy: you reckon you know my ✔ Jimmy: no need to answer Janis: if you wanna be my mate you clearly don't ✔ nice very highly Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: you were talking bollocks when going on about how nice you ALWAYS are to me Janis: by my standards Janis: too nice Janis: but by everyone else's, not winning no 😇🏆 Jimmy: 1. I give out the 🏆 2. no fucker else has any standards around here Janis: what's your verdict then Jimmy: on how nice you are or how much I rate it? Janis: both Jimmy: what's my verdict on you asking questions you know the answer to, more like Janis: 😳 you Jimmy: you Janis: tell me how nice I am, go on 😏 Jimmy: make me Janis: 🥺🥺 Jimmy: it don't work without your 👀 Janis: [🥺 selfie] Jimmy: rude Janis: no, I'm nice Jimmy: it'd be nice if you were here and I could just Janis: what would you do Jimmy: you know what Jimmy: I'm nice Janis: yeah Janis: I can say it Jimmy: might do but you can't take a compliment Janis: psh Jimmy: alright so if I 🗨 nobody's ever been this nice to me, you won't be 😳😳? Janis: maybe a 🤏 but you don't need to know Jimmy: I want to though Jimmy: your 😳 is high on my list Janis: because it makes me look so 🤓 Jimmy: it makes us even Janis: [adorable nerdiness] Jimmy: might not remember when I got on the 🚗 to tell you the story of being a twat but I do and when it happened an' all Jimmy: 😳 before it were 😎 me Jimmy: it's just something you can do, Janet 🏆👏🌹 Jimmy: to be fuming about but I'm not Janis: Then you won't be mad that I do remember Jimmy: 'course you do, you were 🙀 I were gonna fall off Janis: 'scuse me for not wanting to watch you get injured when I could have the pleasure of doing it myself Janis: not Lucas Jimmy: compared to him you're a saint Jimmy: but don't worry I won't let your shit nan know Janis: just not a watch in the cupboard type Janis: I wouldn't bring up the subject, she might assault you or something Jimmy: can't have that or any more time off work 🤐 Janis: 💔 Janis: the world needs it's caffeine and it's eyecandy Janis: can't be selfish like Jimmy: direct your 🎻🎻 @ my manager SO hard done by that I didn't do boxing day he's given me every shite shift going til we're in school Janis: what a prick Janis: what shifts will he be working, I wonder Jimmy: there you go with the questions you know the answers to, girl Jimmy: if it weren't a full time job pissing off Ian, what with him being so easy going and it taking ages to do his head in, I'd add him to the hit list an' all Janis: fair, did do that one for effect, babe Janis: they'll send him off to some over shithole and you'll have a new one in a month, s'what they do with managers, yeah Janis: not worth the 🕖 or 💪 Janis: other* Jimmy: 💔 it ain't what they do with Ian's role within his company Janis: a good sex pest is hard to come by Janis: keeping tight hold, like Jimmy: every other dickhead stopping at stealing 🖋s Jimmy: pisstake Janis: he must be good at whatever the fuck he's actually meant to be doing besides 👀🖐 Janis: try to be selective so we don't have no more famines n shit Jimmy: @iantaylor8 for the Q&A Janis: think I'm 😍 for accounts Janis: no tah Jimmy: 👍 Janis: you're gonna have to offer me something more to pretend to be 😍 for your dad, soz Jimmy: I'm alright for you not fake dating him an' all Janis: good Janis: not seeing how that would EVER make him wanna leave anyway Janis: such a delight Jimmy: when you 💔 him duh Jimmy: but it's still a no tah Janis: think of some way before resorting to that Jimmy: I'd stay before that Janis: I appreciate it Jimmy: me an' all that you don't wanna fuck my dad Janis: 🤢 Jimmy: right Janis: you don't look that alike Jimmy: I'll take that compliment Janis: you can definitely have it Jimmy: that'll be the nicest thing you've ever said to me Jimmy: even if I were about forever Janis: bit sly to challenge me to compliment you loads Janis: 🥰 you Jimmy: 😏 Janis: he's clearly just pissed he's past it, and weren't as 😎 as you to begin with Jimmy: we're all 💔🎻😭 he gave his best years to Debbie when there's loads of Sharons cracking on with doing their roots as we 🗨 Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: *😢 I know Janis: yet again, SUCH a shame my ma's a natural blonde Janis: been a widow for ages, give him some tips Jimmy: for her Jimmy: what a bloody catch she's missed out on there Janis: 💔🎻😭 all over again Janis: 'tis the season Jimmy: 🤞 they've taken the mistletoe down in his office Janis: can he hang on 'til NYE Janis: such a lad, it seems unlikely Jimmy: the things that Q&A would be full of if you'd only crack on, girl Janis: I'm naturally curious, don't be rude Jimmy: 💀💀💀😼 Janis: you saw all the fuckers Janis: just more siblings Jimmy: and I had to tell our kid all their names Janis: 😏 Janis: unlucky Jimmy: you gonna stop pissing about and get fluent or what 🤓? Janis: oi Janis: give me a break, it hasn't ACTUALLY been that long, remember Jimmy: I get it, I'm no Mr Lucas 😭😭😭 Janis: who is Janis: 🏆 lifetime achievement best teacher ever Janis: anyway, I like it when you talk, remember Janis: only so much your brother and me need to 🗨 about Jimmy: I were more thinking about you pulling your weight when him and Libi 🗨 but alright Janis: how long did it take to learn it Janis: actually Janis: obviously you didn't before 👶 Jimmy: no different from learning any other, how good's your spanish? Jimmy: it's about how much you bother, have to every day Janis: makes sense, not like it's optional Janis: and my Spanish is pretty shit, Lucas don't teach it 💔 Janis: it's like Portuguese but barely know any of that either, shit nan being predictably shit Jimmy: what about 🍀? Janis: little better Janis: did offer my services in good faith earlier Jimmy: to answer your Q, still get things wrong and he's been about and deaf for ages Jimmy: but it says fluent on the CV, nowt else matters Janis: 👌 Janis: long as you got the basics down, he ain't 💀 any time soon Janis: might try it with my cousin Janis: she don't speak Jimmy: bring her on the playdate long as Libi won't be 💔 Jimmy: our kid could have a teaching 🏆 an' all Janis: her ma probably won't have that Janis: not Libi stealing my phone to come up with the excuses there Jimmy: she the one from church? Janis: 💀 crew's oldest member, yeah Jimmy: next time there's a catholic occasion, we'll steal the kid Jimmy: can't really stop us, her Janis: 🦴 as a weapon? Jimmy: better bring the 🐕 in case Janis: 💡🥇 Janis: alright, I'm down Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: you off that fucking 🚍 yet or what? Janis: how far have you even got Jimmy: if it was real 💕 you'd have got off to 🏃 an' all Jimmy: have met me in the middle Janis: thank god it's fake Janis: don't need us both aimlessly 🏃 about Janis: but I'm basically back now, so I will keep a 👀 out Jimmy: have a 🥃 if you've got owt left from that 🎁 dunno where I am Janis: put your location on so I can santa-track you Janis: know what you and 🐑 are like, you'll get well off track and well distracted Jimmy: nowt to do with your 👀 OBVS Jimmy: [does put his location on] Jimmy: Where am I then? Janis: you can compliment me when you're nearer Janis: well done for being in the right county Janis: 🤔 okay, hang on Jimmy: 🍻 Janis: I'm gonna get your dad's car and come find you Janis: may as well Jimmy: that's how lost I am 😒 Janis: that bus takes long enough Janis: I wanna see you now Jimmy: alright Janis: you didn't fuck up that horrifically Jimmy: bollocks Janis: it's even more classics that you're lost Janis: very goals Janis: really should pick you up on horse but fuck that Jimmy: fake a 🐴 when we tweet it, be alright Janis: as long as you're not feeling let down Jimmy: NEVER Janis: good Janis: so ✨ you Jimmy: I just wanna see you an' all Janis: 👀 at me long as you like Jimmy: very subtle challenge Janis: yeah, 'cos that's all I want Jimmy: need an even longer lens to stalk you from the north Jimmy: make the most of my 😍 dickhead Janis: 😒 Jimmy: what? Janis: nothing 'cept someone just got off at my stop so I might be about to be murdered Jimmy: Oi, I ain't falling for that again Jimmy: you're too 💪🏆🥇 baby, weren't that what you wanted me to say about the mugging? Janis: ugh Janis: so tough being this tough Jimmy: whoever that dickhead is can't 💀💀💀 you Jimmy: not part of the plan Janis: I'll let 'em know you said so Jimmy: 📢 OI Jimmy: my victim, piss off Janis: **fake girlfriend Jimmy: *best mate I've ever had Janis: oi Jimmy: ? Janis: meant to be scaring off weirdos, not being soft Jimmy: just claiming you, Jessica, if you wanted to be pissed on, you should've said Janis: got to draw the line somewhere Jimmy: I'll chuck you a pen Jimmy: can stab that prick with it after Janis: 🧛👅🩸 Jimmy: Oi Jimmy: don't fill up on him Janis: come on Janis: I could never get enough of you Jimmy: 💔💔 Janis: Baby Janis: I don't want anyone else Jimmy: control your 🩸 lust for a bit longer, tah very much Jimmy: you can have all mine Janis: you know you've got all of mine Jimmy: hurry up and come here Janis: I am, I swear Jimmy: on what? Janis: my 👀s? Jimmy: both of them? Jimmy: if I have to craft you an eye patch I might as well fucking sign up for Pinterest Jimmy: be that mum Janis: do you have a preference? Janis: bit weird Jimmy: is it? Jimmy: 🤐 Janis: you do not Janis: you're taking the piss now Jimmy: am I? Jimmy: not telling you now, mate Janis: 😣 Jimmy: do you want me to have a favourite one? Janis: that's no sort of answer Jimmy: it's a question for you to answer, so go on Janis: I don't think you do Janis: but I wouldn't be mad if you did Jimmy: it's the one on my left Janis: I'm gonna have to stop to look Janis: and then look at yours when you get here Jimmy: no #hate to the other one Jimmy: it's just Janis: you're just Jimmy: I don't know how to explain Janis: you don't need to Janis: I get it Jimmy: might be able to get your head round it if you have a look Jimmy: no good with words, me Janis: it IS weird but I feel it too Janis: I've 👀 at you enough to have favourites and 👀 things that it feels Janis: 😳 to admit to noticing Jimmy: I thought you were gonna say you'd looked at yourself enough to have a favourite eye Janis: charming 😂 Jimmy: probably don't spread that about, babe Jimmy: I mean, I get it, if I were you'd I'd be in the mirror all the time an' all but Janis: you know what you look like Janis: #bigheadconfirmed Jimmy: I never said I don't look at myself loads in every shiny surface of the CG Jimmy: what else am I gonna 👀 @ the customers?! I'm alright for that Janis: don't blame you Janis: obvs Jimmy: so go on, you said you've got favs Janis: I am not giving you them all Janis: right now Jimmy: one for one Janis: fair enough Janis: your freckles Janis: the ones on your back, especially but all of them Jimmy: you should've said before now, I'd have chucked you a pen for them an' all Jimmy: be a bit rude of me to do it to yours Janis: I can use my hands Janis: not that I scratch with purpose or intent Jimmy: 🎨 Janis: I should 📸 Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: I won't get a weird close up of your eye or owt though Janis: do what you like Janis: just leave it off the feed if it ain't #goals Jimmy: whatever we do is #goals Janis: just too good Jimmy: 🥇 Janis: alright, I'm getting near, stay still now Jimmy: 😎🚬 Jimmy: though that does sound like you're 🙀🙀 of sudden movements Janis: just mean don't keep walking and walk right past me/into the headlights tah Jimmy: not how you wanna 💀💀💀 me Jimmy: I'll leave it out Janis: you'll be glad you did Jimmy: never been a letdown, you Janis: don't need to big me up until I prove it Jimmy: I'm only saying you have, not that you don't have to keep doing it Janis: have to? Janis: 😏 Jimmy: I said what I said Janis: [turn up] Janis: get in Jimmy: [does obvs but not before opening her car door and kissing her because simply must] Janis: [pulling him into the car on your side so you're both in the driver's seat now, having a moment] Jimmy: [fully support that wherever you are rn] Jimmy: [telling her he's missed her in between kisses when he's capable of forming words that don't just come out as sounds, we've probably had to have a few attempts at it lol] Janis: [she's not going to be any better so don't you worry boy, probably just keep saying 'I' and 'you' and not finishing any sentences here] Jimmy: [it's a mood and we all know it, like he's been drinking from Ian's stash but not enough that we can run away with ourselves, he's already said a lot of feelsy shit here, we see you and your fave eye sir] Janis: [we've said a lot without saying it in a way that seems serious af but we know honey we know] Jimmy: [not even doing it deliberately so it hurts more when she runs away, the feels are just naturally high and things be progressing] Janis: [mhmm, damn you shit nan, why you gotta ruin it] Jimmy: [she can't, you'll get back to this lads and beyond it] Janis: [that's true] Janis: [for now, stay in this car as long as you wanna, then go back to the cali gaff and live your best life some more] Jimmy: [soz fam that they can't bear to be separated] Janis: [its lowkey a good thing anyway, you can take the car to work/back to Ian, at least she's at home, like we all know you'll take that] Jimmy: [we all just want you to be happy hen] Janis: [though we are suspish/triggered by you Jimothy, we're not wilding yet Jimmy: [soz about that Jimothy, Liam really did you dirty] Janis: [oh lads, the fact we'll never really know the truth of that whole situ] Jimmy: [we really did something there, I love us] Janis: [do you think anyone would watch the tapes before Libi? 'cos like Ali would wanna but wouldn't but I could make a case that Ruster MIGHT, which would be drama] Jimmy: [oooh yeah good point, I do like the idea of that drama because I am rude] Janis: ['cos they could still come away from it thinking he was just a stalker or whatever we want] Janis: [but it would potentially give some closure before Libi is old enough to watch and understand 'cos they'd clearly love each other] Jimmy: [yeah agreed, I definitely think there's a lot of potential there with what they could take away from viewing all those vids] Janis: [okay, noted for later honeybuns] Janis: [is there anything we wanna vibe for tonight] Jimmy: [I think we've done a lot and this is probably getting long] Janis: [coolio hun]

1 note · View note

dong-hyucks · 7 years

Note

Hi there cutie! I binged all your NCT scenarios yesterday 💜 and they were amazing! Here's my request. Character: NCT's Winwin 1. Enemy to Lover (I haven't seen any scenario where Winwin hates anyone, so you'll be the first!) 2. My prompt is a bit detailed, but hear me out: First Winwin hates y/n, but then prompt 7 and 39 happen. Then prompt 83. And the conclusion is a happy ending as lovers with 37, 38, and 50. Thank you, and congrats for 1K ohmygoodness gurl you're sLAYin

Dong Sicheng (Winwin) ; “I dreamt about you last night.” , “Don’t cry.” , “Stay there, I’m coming to get you.” , “Can I kiss you?” , “I think you’re beautiful.” + Enemies↣Lovers!AU / College!AU ↳ College!AU not requested

Prompts here.Masterlists

hey back cutie thanks for all your support ily

i had to omit one of the numbers (38 specifically) because i had a limit on number requests (which was five) so i hope you don’t mind :)

but thanks for making my job easier by being so detailed lmao

also can i just say listening to day6 helped me write this their lyrics are so salty lwfhakah

alrighty

so sicheng over here doesn’t hate hate you, he just dislikes your presence

he’s a transfer student from china

so are you, from [country other than s. korea lol]

needless to say, you didn’t have very good first impressions of each other

sicheng had bought a new shirt n trousers for the first day because he wanted to look presentable

he was like the first student in the lecture room

you came in like two minutes late, looking tired af, armed with your supplies and a slightly cold cup of coffee

the lecture room wasn’t that big and there were a lot of students

and the only available seat was beside sicheng or beside the seemingly hungover dude in the corner

you chose sicheng

you had to waddle in between the chairs and the moment you were a mere metre away from sitting down

you tripped over a girl’s bag that she had left on the ground

your books fell atop your chair and on the ground

and your coffee?

it went flying from your hands

and onto an unsuspecting sicheng

you gasped so loudly, and kind of just stood there covering your mouth in shock

sicheng was wide-eyed, obviously in shock

once the initial surprise blew over, he realized how many people were staring, including the professor who had walked in just as the coffee spilled

his cheeks burned in embarrassment as he glared over at you

before you could even blurt out an apology, sicheng excused himself and practically sprinted out the door

the professor just told you to wipe the spill and copy notes for both yourself and sicheng

you agreed because you felt absolutely horrible

he looked traumatized

you ventured to the non-gender specific washrooms to grab a bunch of paper towel

and you found him hunching over one of the sinks, dabbing at his body with an already soaked clump of what you had gone to get

feeling incredibly bad, you got more paper towel and tried to hand it to him

sicheng didn’t even look up, smacking your hand away, in turn making the bundle of paper towels to flutter to the floor

you were kind of like ‘well that was unnecessary’

but you didn’t say it out loud, opting to just frown as you cradled your slightly red hand

“i’m sorry for–”

“go away.”

you were shocked again by how deep and off-putting his voice was

he sounded so pissed off with you

however, you were determined to apologize properly, otherwise you’d feel terrible for the rest of the semester

“look, i just want to apologize–”

finally looking up, sicheng narrowed his watering eyes at you in a harsh glare

“i told you already, go away.”

your frown deepened

you couldn’t help but feel slightly ticked off by his behaviour

yes, you did spill coffee on him, but hey! you tried to apologize and help him out by giving him more towels but he completely blew you off

but, you knew that if you were in his shoes, you’d probably be acting the same

you definitely wouldn’t be smiling if it had been you, that’s for sure

you couldn’t even say anything before he began to hunch over the sink even more

you noticed his shoulders shaking slightly, his fingers grasping the edge of the sink tightly

“are you stupid? i told you– go away!”

he sounded much more pressing than he had the first two times

you scoffed at the fact that he had called you stupid, but decided to just leave him be

if he wanted to drench in cold coffee by himself, then so be it

after picking up the paper towels that he had smacked out of your hand and grabbing a bit more, you returned to the lecture room with furrowed brows

sicheng didn’t return to class that day

grumbling, you stayed behind in the school’s library to copy down another pair of notes for sicheng when you would’ve been at home watching tv

you didn’t even know his name

unfortunately for you, the schools only two photocopiers had been malfunctioning since the summer break was coming to an end, and they still hadn’t had a repairman come by to fix it

in other words, you had to copy the four pages worth of notes by hand

it took you roughly half an hour to copy down everything

you made sure the notes were legible, not wanting to piss sicheng off even more because you were going to be honest with yourself; sicheng being mad at you made you mad somehow

you thought it was odd but something about sicheng just irked you

what, you had no clue

anyway, you learned his name the next day when the professor asked him to stay after class

you guys still had to sit together because the other seats were filled

you spent the entire two weeks plain out ignoring each other, and when you did interact there was usually some sour looks involved

everyone thought you were crazy for disliking sicheng

according to literally everyone else on campus, he was a total sweetheart

you: “if only you knew hmph”

although, you did have to come to terms with it after witnessing sicheng being kind to others yourself

“dammit”

then, once that fortnight had passed

you could’ve sworn your professor hated you

he told the class that he was going to have you be in partners to do some major research

and lo and behold

you were partnered up with sicheng

typical cliches amirite

you didn’t have a choice

working with your partner efficiently helped with your mark (ba dum tss)

and you weren’t up to having marks docked purely because you disliked your partner

neither was sicheng

you guys begrudgingly exchanged numbers, avoiding eye contact the entire time

you didn’t even talk face to face you just agreed to meet in the school’s library after his afternoon classes

so after meeting up with your friends n having drinks you had to leave to meet with sicheng

you were dreading it

you had previously convinced yourself that you could just simply ignore him

but as you got closer and closer to the library you realized you couldn’t

anywho, he arrived soon after and the two of you went to a table nearing the far wall

after setting up you kind of just worked in silence

occasionally, he’d ask you a few questions and vice versa

as time passed (luckily the library was accessible 24/7) you were getting more and more tired

however, your pride didn’t allow you to tell sicheng that

so you kept going, holding back yawns

until you literally just fell asleep at your laptop

sicheng didn’t even notice until he realized the clicks of your keyboard had ceased

he frowned at the sight of you before he realized it was past midnight

he just turned your laptop to him and pressed save

sighing, he just kept working

less than ten minutes later his eyes were trailing back to you

he grumbled to himself, realizing you were shivering

mumbling under his breath, he took out his jacket from his bag and hung it over your shoulders

eventually, sicheng got tired as well

realizing it was now almost two in the morning, he decided to just save everything for now and continue the next time you guys were to meet

after packing his things (and yours) he shook you awake

by the time you actually woke up, all you saw was sicheng’s back as he walked off

you realized your things were packed up and blinked in confusion

‘did he really just pack my things for me?’

you went home, the nap making you feel even more tired than before

the next day, you woke up with a start

“nonononoNoNo–”

your roommate, Eunjae, looked at you with a raised brow

“what’s up with you?”

you didn’t answer, choosing to just scream into your pillow, your face red

in your haste, you didn’t even check if your phone was in your bag like you usually did

you went to your morning class early

you nearly cursed the world for making sicheng be your classmate in almost every class you had

luckily, in your next class – mathematics – you sat near the front while he sat in the very back

so you didn’t have to deal with him

that is

until class was over

as you swung your bag over your shoulder and made your way to the exit, sicheng stopped you

memories of what you had dreamed about came flooding back to you

your face went hot and you quickly scrambled away

sicheng was confused

yes he knew you disliked him but you had never reacted like that before

usually you like to have the final word before leaving but that time you didn’t even say anything

he legitimately had to tell you something and he couldn’t exactly text you about it

so he chased after you

“wait!! [Y/N]!”

hearing him yell after you made you sprint faster

buuttttt sicheng is magic ok so he caught up to you

he stopped in front of you, slightly panting

before you could say anything, he took hold of your wrist

while you struggled to escape he went through his jacket pocket before taking out a phone

your phone

“you left this at the library yesterday. i found it when i went back for my mouse.”

you kind of just stared at him

you realized that you were staring for too long when he began to look uncomfortable

looking down at your phone, you took hold of it with your free hand

“thanks,,, i guess”

im literally having an allergic reaction while writing this lol

you took one more glance at his confused look before darting off leaving him confused af

‘why were they acting like that???’ - him for the next few hours

then, he found you again later that night

you were hanging out with your friends in the courtyard

he walked up to you, with intentions of talking about the research

but once you spotted him, you looked ready to jump out of your seat and run a marathon if it meant getting away from him

“wait!!”

and so, you did

why– you had no clue

“why have you been so jumpy around me today?”

“,,,”

“you can tell me”

“imayormaynotehavedreamtaboutyou”

“what??”

you sighed, just going to face your problems

“i,,, dreamt about you last night.”

after that, you guys kind of stopped hating each other

now you could tolerate the other

you talked a bit more while doing research, but not by much

on the day you guys finished doing the research

sicheng proposed that you do the last bit at a starbucks or smth so you could treat yourselves when you finished

ofc you agreed because honestly coffee after work?? during work??? heavenly.

ironically i don’t like coffee

anywho

it was sunny that day

and you guys chose a spot by the window

you were undeterred by the sun, despite the annoying glare it made on your laptop screen

you just kept working, taking the occasional sip of your drink (that sicheng ordered for you)

sicheng was working away at his part of the project too

but as time went on, his hands and eyes were getting tired so he leaned back to take a break

just then, you got a notification from your friend

they had sent you a picture of [whatever your favourite animal is my fav is otters :)]

so you started smiling the moment sicheng looked up at you

he nearly choked right then n there

the way your hair caught the light? he was s h o c k e d

the cute way you tilted your head when you smiled? he was s h o c k e d

okay case in point, he was shocked

he found himself listening to his racing heartbeat rather than the buzz and chatter of the busy shop

his heart had never raced that fast because of you, so why was it now?

he had seen you smile in the past, and he would admit that he thought you were cute but before he wasn’t this affected

“um– i have to use the washroom, excuse me”

you just nodded, still smiling because of the photo

you didn’t notice the way his voice wavered or the way he practically ran to the washroom, too engrossed in either your work or the photo

when sicheng got to the washroom he just locked the door and stared at himself in the mirror with wide eyes

he was still in shock

‘do i like them?’

‘no, it can’t be…’

‘but…’

he’d let out a really quite n frustrated groan, messing up his hair as he rubbed his face in exhaustion

in that moment, in the silence of the washroom, he noticed just how stressed he was

he was on the brink of failing half of his classes due to pure exhaustion and the other two he was barely passing

and now he had to figure out whatever it was he was feeling?? toward someone he could barely stand to sit beside a mere fortnight beforehand?

as he stared down at the eggshell white sink, something fell

he blinked in confusion

looking up, he was surprised to see a single tear falling from his right eye, following the one that had just fell

he was surprised

the last time he cried was when he first got really homesick, but he could see reason for that

was he crying because of stress??

was he crying because he was confused???

he didn’t even bother to wipe his face, he just let his tears slowly cascade down his cheeks

after a while, he finally dabbed at his face with some paper towel and walked out

you made eye contact with him immediately, your straight face becoming concerned

sicheng kept his eyes glued to the tiled flooring, so he didn’t notice the change

when he sat back down without a word and just began typing you frowned

he looked

well

dead to be honest

you felt as if he wasn’t up for talking right now so you took your phone and sent him a small text

“don’t cry :) it might not be that comforting, but i’m here if you ever want to talk.”

you quickly placed the phone down and went back to work, your eyes flitting over your laptop screen to see his reaction

when his phone vibrated, the noise making a loud buzz against the wood of his chair, you curled up slightly

as he took out his phone, your eyes kept moving from your screen to him

finally, he looked up at you with a confused expression

without saying anything, you just pointed toward your eyes with a sheepish smile

his were slightly red and puffy

it wasn’t too noticeable, but if you were looking at him for longer than five seconds you’d notice

you had sported the same look while watching a drama the other day

instead of replying, sicheng sent you a weak smile before going back to typing

you sighed, doing the same

your drink went cold.

after the research was finished, you and sicheng didn’t really have a reason to talk to each other anymore

you were kind of sad, surprisingly

when the project first started you had been so excited for the day of its completion

but now that it’s come, you were just disappointed

to your own surprise, hanging out with sicheng wasn’t unbearable, not at all

you had found yourself waiting for time to go faster so you could hurry up and meet with him already

sicheng was a pretty nice guy

if you had told yourself that a month ago, you would’ve scoffed

you found yourself searching for him whenever you’d walk into a classroom or into the library

you didn’t even realize you were doing it until your friend pointed it out

at that point, it hit you

you, at some point in time, had grown to like dong sicheng

you, in all honesty, weren’t that surprised

you had suspected that you had feelings when you started feeling hot whenever he’d be near you (so, every other day basically)

and your heart would pound whenever he’d smile in your direction

whenever it’d happen you just shot it down because – no, you can’t possibly like dong sicheng – but lo and behold it’s possible

really, you just accepted it

you couldn’t just stop yourself from liking him, even if you tried

and by accepting it, you accept the thought that he could never like you

in your opinion, he was out of your league

so you just kind of

left your little crush alone

you didn’t make any moves

you didn’t talk to him more

you just continued on with life

unknowingly, you found yourself glancing over in his direction more and more often

you’d start checking if he was looking over at you, even if it was just a mere glance

and more often than not, he would be looking

however, the clock was usually on the other side of you, so maybe he was just watching for the time

before you knew it, your little crush and blown up into something more

by the time you realized how deep you were, you had no idea what to do

by ignoring it, you thought your crush would just go away, but now that it hadn’t you were confused

you found yourself longing for his presence

and missing the way he’d laugh at your little quips whenever you worked together

you talked it over with your friend and what they told you astonished you, despite how obvious it was

“[Y/N],,, you’re in love with sicheng, aren’t you?”

“,,, shit”

once it had truly dawned on you– your true feelings for the male, you started to freak out whenever he’d draw close

it got to the point where you started avoiding him in hallways because you got too flustered at the mere sight of him

me too, [Y/N], me too

this went on for a while

when sicheng noticed you literally spinning on your heel and speed walking the other way he’d be hurt

he thought you hated him

so he asked your friend, the one he sees you with a lot

“this might sound weird but,,,, does [Y/N] hate me again?”

“,,,”

when your friend started laughing, he felt so embarrassed

he thought he had said something wrong or something weird

maybe it was wrong and weird, he didn’t know

once your friend calmed down, they just whispered something before making their way down the hall

after that, sicheng made a valiant effort to approach you

and you notice right away

he’d frown whenever you started sprinting away, but with the new information he had acquired via your friend, he wasn’t as worried anymore

but he was kind of frustrated because he wanted to tell you everything so badly

he couldn’t exactly do that when you were straight up running from him

you weren’t answering texts either

and then that back and forth went on

it was only a month before the senior student’s graduation did something happen

so your friends had invited you to a party

you usually just turned them down, but you felt so stressed over school and work that you just threw caution out the window and agreed

you carpooled to the party

it was the typical type of house party you’d expect

dimmed lights, colourful lights strung from the ceiling, alcoholic drinks and party cups were neatly lined on a table that had been pushed against the wall

there was loud music too, almost deafening

you just stuck to the wall as everyone bounced happily around you, feeling out of your element

suddenly, a drunken man – someone you had recognized as one of the many faces at your school – stumbled through the crowd of bodies, sending you a sleazy smile and what had appeared to be an attempt at a wink

“hey there,” he slurred, stepping so close you could smell the beer in his breath “what’re you doing alone?”

you just kept using your phone

‘hopefully he just goes away’

he didn’t

when you didn’t respond, he roughly gripped a hand around your wrist, pulling you to his torso

“i asked you a question,” he grumbled

wrenching yourself out of his grasp, you pushed him away with knitted brows; “get off me, you drunkard”

bad idea apparently

the man narrowed his eyes at you, moving to reach for you again

you stepped out of his reach

your little taunting vexed him, making him completely lunge at you despite his drunken state

you quickly rushed up the stairs, knowing he’d catch up if you attempted to weave through the crowd to the door

opening a random door, you jumped inside and slammed it shut

you locked it, hearing the pounding knocks that could be from no one but him shortly after

after around ten minutes, the knocking ceased and you heard heavy footsteps going down the stairs

letting out a sigh of relief, you reached for the door knob

you had sighed too early, it seemed

the door was jammed

you frowned, pushing your body weight against the door

it still wouldn’t open

you started to freak out

being stuck in some stranger’s bathroom on a friday night wasn’t exactly ideal

taking out your phone, you quickly dialed your friends number

they didn’t answer

you tried again

still no answer

by this time, you felt scared

you didn’t like how cramped the bathroom felt

even if you aren’t afraid of small spaces, it felt as though the walls were closing in

slowly but surely

you wanted to cry from frustration honestly

when none of your friends bothered, probably too enamoured with the music and/or their dance partners, your frown deepened

realizing it was your only choice then, you dialed the final number in your contacts

soon, a tired little “hello?” came warbling through the receiver

“sicheng? sorry to be calling so late, but i kind of need help”

you explained to him the entire thing, from start to finish

you had begun to shake, eyeing the walls suspiciously

“hey,” he mumbled, his voice soft. “stay there, alright? i’m coming to get you.”

you just nodded, eyeing the jammed door, holding your phone so tightly your knuckles were losing colour

“not like i have a choice, but okay

he chuckled for a moment

“just breath– will you do that for me?”

at his words, you took in a deep breath

you couldn’t even finish your final sentence before he was messaging you back saying he’d be there in ten

sooner than you had expected, the door opened

behind that door, was sicheng

he too looked uncomfortable with the setting, and it wasn’t long before the two of you were rushing out

“i can drive you home,” he suggested

you couldn’t even refuse before he opened the passenger door for you

you sighed, stepping into the ceiling after saying thank you

he got into the other side and started the car

the ride was silent, aside from you telling him where to go

by the time you had reached your house, you were surprised

only five minutes had passed

when you turned to thank sicheng again, he was already looking at you

he looked flustered, something that was apparent under the bright light of the street lamp mere metres away from sicheng’s car

“is something wrong?”

he was silent for a moment, biting his lip in uncertainty

then, he spoke

and when he did, your heart raced once again

“can i,,, kiss you?”

you gasped

sicheng looked embarrassed at the fact that he asked– ashamed even

before he could even apologize

you had leaned over the centre console and cupped his face with your hands before pressing your lips against his in a gentle kiss

sicheng’s eyes were blown wide with surprise, before they finally closed and he relaxed

the kiss was slow and sweet and you pulled away slowly just seconds later, your eyes still closed

sicheng was the first to open his eyes, and when he did he smiled widely

“you know,,,, i think you’re beautiful.”

125 notes · View notes

punkscowardschampions · 4 years

Text

Rio & Buster

Rio: [Before, probably late PM night before or early af AM] Rio: What time are you getting there? Buster: [A time that Baze would fuck with] Rio: In time for the easter egg hunt then Rio: I've got to help set up Buster: Ava refuses to miss it, meaning none of us can Rio: Well, duh Rio: and no, I won't tell you where any of the eggs are hidden Buster: I could help you set up Buster: Then I'd know Rio: Then you would be disqualified Rio: also, doesn't seem very 'you', does it? Buster: If anyone asks, I'm doing it to help my sister cheat Buster: I'd argue that's very me Rio: I can see that Rio: I'll see you then then Buster: I miss you Rio: I miss you more Rio: today is going to be weird Buster: If it gets too much, just tell me Buster: Nobody'll be surprised to see me leave Rio: Not you, no Buster: I mean it, I don't even have to go at all Buster: If you don't want me to Rio: You should be there Rio: and I'd rather see you than not at all Rio: we have to try, don't we Buster: Yeah Rio: when did we get too old for the egg hunt? Buster: I wouldn't know, I was always getting disqualified Rio: you're too competitive Buster: There's no such thing Rio: I think the 😭😡 suggested otherwise Buster: You couldn't handle losing to me, that's not my fault Rio: it wasn't just me, thank you Buster: But I only cared about you so Rio: if you really cared, you would've let me win 😏 Buster: That wouldn't impress you Buster: Don't act like I didn't share the prizes Rio: I think you might've been forced to Rio: very ungracious winner, you Buster: Nobody's ever been able to force me to do anything, you know that Rio: I know Rio: and you always looked very cute Buster: Like I said, I had to impress you Rio: You did Rio: and you will Rio: it'll be very distracting from 🐇 duties Buster: You're not gonna dress like one, are you? Rio: Probably not Rio: make the adults uncomfortable and can't chase 'round after the kids very well in stilettos and a corset, like Buster: I'd offer to carry you but that would make everyone even more uncomfortable Rio: 😞 Rio: like no one cares about my comfort, honestly Buster: I care, baby Rio: I know Rio: we should have a few minutes though, when your dad is fighting granddad over the lamb/to be the new alpha and the rest are trying to keep the kids from ruining their lunch by making themselves sick on chocolate Buster: What could be more romantic, like? Rio: Yeah Rio: but we've got to make the most Buster: We will Buster: I don't wanna call it a leaving present but I've got something for you Rio: Is it a surprise? Buster: Until you find it Rio: Ooh Rio: what if someone else finds it? Rio: am I gonna have to snatch it from a child's hands real fast, like Buster: They won't, I'm gonna leave it somewhere that means something to me and you Buster: Separate from the Easter Egg Hunt Rio: I'm excited Buster: Good Buster: 'Cause I can't sleep Rio: Me either Rio: let's be together now Buster: Alright Rio: we can make each other sleepy when we wanna Buster: When we have to, not before Rio: That's good with me, baby Buster: I love you Rio: I love you, don't forget Rio: in a weird way, it'll be fun trying to find ways to show you without anyone noticing Buster: Put a dress on, that'll really help me out Rio: 😳 oh Buster: As long as I'm not the one blushing tomorrow, nobody should notice Rio: I can't promise no ears but I'll leave the tail for when we're alone Rio: that should save your blushes Buster: I appreciate that, babe Rio: I'm clearly not as thoughtful as you, but I do try Buster: You're clearly more thoughtful than me 'cause you don't have to try Rio: but I didn't get you a surprise Buster: You're not the one leaving Rio: so, when I come visit you Rio: okay Rio: gives me time to think Buster: I always think about that Rio: you better have a clear schedule next weekend Rio: 'cos all I need is an excuse to be in London Buster: I'll clear it Rio: I need the whole weekend Rio: we'll have so much to catch up on Rio: show much to show you Buster: You had me at next weekend Rio: you know I'm bad at being patient Buster: You've had to be patient for far too long Rio: I'm gonna have to get a better job though Rio: to see you as often as I wanna Buster: If you get another job you won't get to see me at all Buster: And you don't need one, you've got me Rio: You can't pay for everything, it isn't fair Rio: and I didn't say another, just a better one Buster: It's not fair that you'll have to find excuses to come to London Buster: Or that you'll have to job hunt Rio: I've got enough saved for a bit anyway Buster: Keep saving it Rio: Baby Buster: No arguments Buster: I don't need to save money, I need you Rio: But Buster: But is the beginning of an argument Rio: I don't wanna argue with you, daddy Buster: Then don't Rio: tell me it's alright Buster: You know it is Buster: I look after you and you look after me Rio: I just don't wanna take advantage Buster: You're not Rio: I'm not that bitch Rio: not with you, anyway Buster: I know who you are Rio: if your friends got any hot dads I can scam though Rio: lmk Buster: Obviously Rio: I'll do mums too Rio: if they're dumb enough Buster: They are Rio: Figured Buster: [Everyone's parents deets casually] Rio: 😂😂 Rio: damn, coming through Buster: Have you forgotten who I am? Rio: no but I always want another reminder Buster: [a selfie like oh hey] Rio: oh my god Rio: I want to be there to cuddle you so bad Buster: Tell me we can get lost for a while during this fucking egg hunt Rio: you've not forgotten how many hiding places there are, I know Rio: lots of people but enough space Rio: 🤞 Buster: You've not forgotten how much I've grown since I last used any of those hiding places, I know Rio: 'scuse me, I'll just be reminiscing over here 🤤🤤🤤 Rio: still, though, I know places Buster: I can't wait for you to show me Rio: [selfie back] Rio: show you that for now Buster: Oh fuck Rio: Can you think of a valid excuse for you to come to church with me tomorrow morning? 😏 Buster: Like you said, it'll look good when I apply to uni Rio: in theory, very 🙏 Rio: in reality, so 😈 Buster: I'll be there Rio: actually? Buster: Yeah Rio: I'll die Buster: I won't let that happen Rio: The others don't come Rio: not even Junie Buster: All the more reason why I should keep you company, babe Rio: Seriously though Rio: it's pretty nightmarish Buster: You've already sold it to me Rio: at least you can sit next to me Rio: none of our family will be there Rio: unless my nan swoops in and steals you🙄 Buster: You'll just have to hold onto me so she can't Rio: I will Rio: so tight, like Buster: Don't let go Rio: Never Rio: You gonna go to confess whilst you're there? Buster: Should I? Rio: Probably not Rio: but technically, he's meant to keep his mouth shut Rio: so you could Buster: You're a secret, not a sin Rio: we could ask Rio: definitely wasn't back in the day, everyone in the bible is cousins, basically Buster: I don't need a second opinion, especially from someone whose first opinion isn't something I particularly need to hear Rio: Okay Buster: We're not doing anything wrong Rio: it won't stop me if we are Buster: It wouldn't stop me either if I thought we were, but I don't Rio: Yeah Buster: Is that what you think? Rio: I don't know what I think Buster: Yeah you do Buster: You just don't wanna say it Rio: like I said, it isn't going to stop me Rio: but it must be Buster: If it was that wrong it'd be illegal Rio: I know it's not illegal Rio: but it's not accepted Buster: Neither's being gay by some people, that's not wrong Rio: well that's different Buster: Why? Rio: we could technically not do this Buster: My sister could technically never fuck a girl, she's still gay Buster: I still love you even if we don't Rio: Yeah Rio: that's true Rio: okay Rio: I don't know Buster: She has a right to be with whoever she wants, so do I Rio: I don't know how to shut out everyone else's bullshit Rio: the jokes, disgust, whatever Buster: They don't have to know Buster: I'm saying any of this 'cause I wanna tell them all tomorrow Buster: not* Rio: No, of course Rio: it still gets in my head though, is all I mean Buster: Yeah, I know Rio: do you think your parents ever cared Rio: it's different but people would've been funny still Buster: Of course Buster: My mum could've got thrown out if it'd have gone wrong Rio: at least we don't have to worry about that Buster: And people have always said shit about this family, one way or another Rio: don't need to tell me Buster: So stop worrying Rio: Helpful 😏 Buster: I can easily help you relax Rio: I've not totally killed the mood? Buster: Don't be ridiculous Buster: I'll do anything to make you feel better, whenever Rio: Do I ever make you feel better? Rio: feel like I'm not pulling my weight here Buster: You know you do Rio: I can do better Rio: just not tonight Buster: There is no better Buster: You're perfect Rio: I love you so much Rio: I'm not gonna lose you 'cos people are idiots with opinions Buster: You're not gonna lose me for any reason Rio: No Rio: but especially that Buster: Good Rio: so, about relaxing Buster: What can I do? Rio: What can't you Rio: you wanna call? Buster: Or you could sneak me in again Buster: What time's church? Rio: 9 Rio: most people sleep through it Rio: my dad, if he bothers to show Buster: So if I'm going with you, it makes sense for me to come over now, yeah? Rio: I think so Rio: you'd have to leave so early to get here on time, you don't want to wake your fam, like Buster: Exactly Buster: And there's less traffic now than there would be at that time of the morning Rio: Right, just makes sense Rio: leave a note for 'em to find later and no one will think anything of it Buster: Fuck that, all our calendars are synced, I just need to add this into mine Rio: 😂 Rio: Wow Buster: You've met my parents, babe Rio: Once or twice Rio: at least I know you aren't such a loser that you always stick to it Buster: Cheers, like Rio: Awh, babe Rio: you're an adorable nerd, you know that Buster: Come on, don't lie Buster: What do I need to bring with me to wear for church then? Rio: you can probably wear what you're gonna wear for the rest of the day Rio: assuming you aren't planning to dress like a 🐇 too, in which case, probably not Buster: Fair assumption Rio: not even if I ask really nicely? Buster: Try it Rio: Will you dress up for me, baby Rio: it'd make me really happy Buster: How happy? Rio: Happy enough I could be persuaded to do whatever you want in return Buster: But you know I could persuade you to do that anyway Rio: but please Buster: I can't say no to you Rio: Don't Rio: 'cos I never wanna say no to you Buster: Don't Rio: What do you want then, most of all Buster: I'm already getting what I want Buster: I'm on my way to you Rio: I like having you in my bed Rio: do you know how often I've dreamt about that Buster: Tell me Rio: I honestly think I thought about that every night Rio: just sleepovers when we was little, but then it turned into sleepovers where you'd kiss me again Rio: and then, you know Buster: Yeah, I do Buster: 'Cause I had the same ones Rio: if I knew that you would be fucking me where I fucked myself over you Rio: it's crazy Buster: Jesus Christ, when you come to London you'll have to pinch me so hard Rio: I can think of better ways to show you how real it is Buster: But I'm trying not to think about any of those possibilities while I'm stuck in this car Rio: But I can't stop thinking about the first time we do it in your bed now Buster: Me either Rio: I haven't been to your house there Rio: ever Buster: I've imagined you there so many times that I was literally about to disagree with you Rio: it doesn't seem possible right Rio: you've been there for what Rio: four, five years Buster: I know Rio: that's ages Rio: no wonder I've missed you as much as I have Buster: I'm sorry Rio: it wasn't your fault Buster: I took the dare Rio: I wanted you to Rio: you know I did Buster: You wanted me to kiss you, not lose my shit and ruin everything afterwards Rio: it makes sense Rio: you know what happened to your parents Rio: that's exactly what would've happened Buster: At least if it had happened that way you wouldn't think it was what I wanted Rio: you're strong Rio: you knew I couldn't do it Buster: We were just kids, I didn't expect it to feel like something we couldn't laugh off Rio: How could we Rio: nothing could've prepared us for that Buster: Like you said, I knew about my parents Rio: but that's special circumstances Rio: you didn't have to save me from anything awful, thank God Buster: We were best friends though, same as them Rio: Yeah Rio: why didn't they notice, tbh Rio: glad they didn't but Buster: They didn't want to Rio: yeah Buster: Whatever they'd rather I didn't do, they look away Rio: Mostly works in your favour Buster: It always works in my favour Rio: Lucky you, then Buster: Don't you feel lucky, babe? Rio: I'm sure I will when you get here Buster: You'll feel everything when I get there Rio: we can go out in the barn for a bit Rio: it's probably trashed but Rio: if you don't wanna be quiet Buster: You're gonna have to be so quiet when I touch you under the table tomorrow Buster: Tonight you should be as loud as you want Rio: I'll be so good for you Buster: I know you will, baby Buster: You're an angel Rio: I've gotta be, you treat me so, so nice Buster: I've gotta, you're the love of my life Rio: say that again please Buster: I love you so fucking much, Rio Rio: You're everything to me Rio: we've got this Buster: 'Course we do Buster: I can do anything as long as you're mine Rio: I've always been yours, and I always will be Rio: nothing will stand in our way Buster: Like you said, I'm lucky Rio: I feel it too Rio: when you go to uni, maybe I can come too Rio: not go to school, I wouldn't get in Rio: but be with you Buster: I'm not going without you Rio: Then I'm coming Buster: Okay Rio: I'll work out a plan for then Buster: We've got time Buster: And you've got loads of options Rio: How long have you had your plan though, nerd baby? Rio: since birth Buster: Shut up Rio: you know I love it about you Buster: Obviously, I know what I want and I get it Rio: 🤤🤤🤤 Rio: see Rio: so tell me Rio: don't tease Buster: You know I had to work it out when I didn't get scouted to be a footballer Rio: that's a crime Rio: but you'll look better in a suit Buster: Well yeah, I manage to make our school uniform look good so Rio: I know Rio: I've seen the evidence Buster: I know, I posted the evidence for you to see Rio: I don't know whether to thank you or get my own back and pose for some evidence of my own now Buster: You can do both, don't limit yourself Rio: Do you deserve both though Buster: You tell me Rio: Let me go look at those pictures again Buster: [also sends a pic of rn] Rio: FUCK Buster: So what do I deserve, babe? Rio: [vid saying thank you over and over] Buster: I should've recorded the sound I just made Rio: Can I ask the driver about it? Rio: 'cos I really need to know Buster: Or you could just make it happen again somehow Rio: You got any ideas how, daddy? Buster: A video worked before Rio: Well, I am desperate to hear you Rio: [pleases AND thank yous] Buster: [sending his oh so extra reaction, so soz to whoever is driving him rn] Rio: I'm gonna listen to that tomorrow when you're touching me Rio: so you can feel what that just did to me Buster: Jesus Rio: I'm gonna cum as soon as you touch me tonight, I swear Buster: You're so beautiful when you do Rio: really Buster: Don't you know that? Rio: Daddy 🥰 Buster: Get in front of your mirror right now, you have to see what I do, this can't wait Rio: Oh God Rio: yes, sir Rio: [pic for proof] Buster: Good girl Rio: How do you want me to touch myself? Buster: Like we're in church Rio: How you're going to touch me in church tomorrow or how I've touched myself in church before? Buster: How you want me to tomorrow, 'cause I'm gonna need to see all the ways you have before, and this isn't about me Rio: it's always about you, Buster Buster: Baby Rio: Do you think we can do it standing up Rio: 'cos we wouldn't even need to be quiet, when they're singing the hymns Buster: I can keep you upright if that's what you're worried about Rio: More worried about how high you'd have to pull my dress up Rio: but worried might not be the word Buster: We can do it Rio: I want you to Rio: how much do you think the people behind will see though Buster: We could sit at the back and then there won't be anyone behind us Rio: We could Buster: How much do you want people to see? Rio: I want you to be in control of that Rio: as little or as much as daddy wants Rio: 'cos I'm yours, and you're the one making me look and feel so good Buster: We'll sit at the front then Rio: Everyone's gonna see everything then Rio: what I do for you, what I let you do to me Buster: That's what real devotion is, which is what they believe they're there for, it's only fair Rio: it feels like a miracle every time you fuck me Rio: they should get to see god's divine touch at work Buster: You're the miracle, babe Buster: I want everyone to know that Rio: Shit Buster: Look at how fucking heavenly you are Rio: I look how I feel Rio: whenever you're with me Buster: I feel it too, never forget that Rio: I make you feel good, don't I, daddy? Buster: [photographic evidence of how good he feels rn because at least that's more subtle than the vocals earlier lol] Rio: Mine Rio: Be here so I can make that feel even better Buster: Soon, just never soon enough Rio: I'm so close, too Rio: if you let yourself in... you don't even have to say anything, just come up behind me and watch us explode together Buster: Fuck Buster: That's the greatest idea you've had in all the years I've known you Rio: I told you, when it comes to you and me Rio: the fantasies I have are never-ending Buster: Thank Christ we have forever then Buster: 'Cause I'm gonna make them all happen for you Rio: You're gonna fuck me forever, aren't you, no matter what Rio: I don't want anyone else ever again, it's not even like 1% of what you give me Buster: Fuck all could stop me, except myself and I don't ever wanna stop, you know that Buster: Never mind the idea that I'd ever let any other cunt touch you now Rio: You have to protect me Buster: I will Rio: You always have Rio: that gets me Buster: I'll never stop doing it either Rio: I need you Buster: I love you Rio: I love you the best Buster: Yeah, you do Rio: More than anyone else Rio: ever Buster: Of course Rio: Tell me to stop touching myself or I'm gonna cum before you get here Buster: No Buster: I told you, you look beautiful, I want you to Rio: but Buster: It's okay, baby Rio: Buster Buster: Rio Rio: Oh God Buster: Don't stop Rio: I won't Buster: I know you won't Rio: [recovery time] Rio: Jesus Buster: You feel better now, yeah? Rio: That's one way to put it Buster: How do you wanna put it? Rio: I feel everything, like you promised Buster: I'm gonna keep every promise to you Rio: I trust you Buster: You can Rio: Actually looking forward to tomorrow now Rio: how do you do that Buster: I told you, I get what I want Buster: And right now all I want is for you to be happy to see me, no matter what Rio: I was Rio: technically it's everyone else I don't wanna see, like Buster: Forget about them Buster: We don't have hardly any time left Rio: Yeah Rio: I can't think about that yet Rio: especially not if we wanna make the most of it Buster: [shows up so they don't have to think about it and can make the most of it/that fantasy she mentioned earlier happen while they're still very much in that mood] Rio: [live your best life kids, we can probably skip to the main event now/everyone being there, right?] Buster: [just know that before we do he's gonna leave her present in her bed because of what she said about having him there and what he said before about hiding under it and also know because I was cockblocked that my idea was some kind of matching jewelry moment that isn't obviously matching so that anyone else would notice but they will know and he'll be wearing his before she finds hers] Rio: [love that so much] Buster: [also x 3 I had an idea that maybe her boyfriend shows up to the egg hunt because you said that he has a load of younger brothers so they could be invited and he thinks it'll be a nice surprise for Rio cos she's been spending all this time with her fam so how awkward] Rio: [that checks out oh boy] Buster: [Buster gonna be LIVID] Rio: [at least it will be painfully obvious you do not want him there lmao] Buster: [that backs up the lie you told Nancy at least] Rio: I'm so sorry Buster: You didn't invite him Rio: Of course not Rio: still Buster: Don't Rio: There's nothing else I can do Buster: Bullshit Rio: What Rio: I can't make him leave Buster: You could Buster: Or we could talk without making him the centre of the conversation Buster: Those are just two obvious options Rio: I was just saying sorry Rio: we don't need to talk about him Buster: Like I said, don't Rio: Okay Buster: It's shit enough that he's here without you feeling bad about it Rio: It's unavoidable Buster: It's not Rio: Anyway Buster: Don't dismiss what I just said Rio: I don't know what you want me to say Buster: Do something then Rio: [leaving your mans like you really gotta go help with something right now] Buster: [😏 can't even help it like] Rio: [so unfocused on whatever nonsense you're doing like don't ruin the meal or anything lol] Buster: I'll make him leave if that's what you want Rio: You can't Rio: even less than I can Buster: 'Course I can Buster: And you know it Rio: You could Rio: but you've got no reason Buster: I don't like him, that's the only reason a selfish cunt like me needs, babe Rio: have you even spoke to each other Buster: Since when is that necessary? Buster: It's been a while since I ruined a family function, like Rio: Don't Rio: because I'll have to leave with him and I don't want that Buster: You never have to do anything with him, except the dumping Rio: Do I have to do that today Buster: He'd fuck off Rio: No he wouldn't Rio: why do you think I'm waiting Rio: you've not dumped anyone, it isn't that simple Buster: Yeah I have Buster: Girls get the wrong idea Rio: then you know, it's at least a conversation Rio: more if you've been together any length of time Buster: Why can't you at least start the conversation? Buster: If he can read body language even slightly then it's not exactly coming out of nowhere Rio: I'm just trying to have a not completely shit day Buster: What so you're enjoying having him here? Rio: Jesus, no Rio: but I'm not gonna enjoy dumping him and having to think up a valid sounding excuse that isn't the actual Buster: Tell him you're over faking it every time, that's basically the actual Rio: Well that's nice 🙄 Buster: You're not gonna stay friends however you do it Rio: Why not Buster: 'Cause he's well into you and you're telling him you're not anymore Buster: If he reckons he wants to be friends, what he really reckons is he can still fuck you/ get you to change your mind about being exes Rio: We've known each other before we did this Rio: we can at least try Rio: either way, I'm not going to tell him he never made me cum and reckon that'll do it Buster: Whatever Rio: he'll have to leave before the meal Rio: it's fine Buster: Yeah Rio: can we talk about something else now Buster: You tell me Buster: He's your best friend all of a sudden, apparently Rio: No he's not, come on Buster: Forget it Rio: Buster Buster: What? Rio: I'll do it, okay Buster: No, that's not okay Buster: Do it on your on terms, not mine Rio: I don't want you to be angry with me Buster: I'm angry but not at you Rio: you can be angry at me Buster: I don't need your permission Buster: [when you playing with aforementioned jewellery that he's wearing but she's not yet because you're not mad at her] Rio: you are though Rio: just let me fix it and be my friend Buster: Don't tell me how I feel Rio: then come see me Buster: [obviously does] Rio: [hug moment] Buster: [everyone busy yourselves for a sec cos they need this] Rio: [at least you're at your house so not everyone needs to be all over this gaff, you'll find somewhere] Buster: [just kill me cos he's so tol and she's so smol] Rio: [it's a mood everyone get on board lol] Buster: [gonna let you makeout for a bit so she knows he's not mad at her lol so hope it's a good hiding place] Rio: [have at it, we can break you apart by one of the kids shouting for one of y'all 'cos kids do not care] Buster: [Grace probably cos she's obsessed with Rio's everything at this age and forever lowkey] Rio: [we know you're that bitch babe] Buster: tell her you love her in between kisses though boy before we ruin your mood again] Rio: [we're having this affirming moment so you both don't freak out any harder here] Buster: [you're welcome] Rio: [go have some boozy bunnies] Buster: [I'm jealous tbh] Rio: [aren't we all] Buster: [Alison knows how to throw a good party honey] Rio: [its this whole fam's thing tm] Buster: [Except you Ro, thank god she's not there] Rio: [how awkward you aren't though like where's the excuse, you would've had to of been at the wedding] Buster: [fake sick but actually always on death's door so] Rio: [we see you sweaty, literally everyone else is here] Buster: [Only the couple on their honeymoon aren't babe, how dare you] Rio: [that is by the by, you've gotta join this party again, soz lads] Buster: [gotta pull her back for an epic last kiss though for that wrist touching again] Rio: [we always pushing it 'til we nearly get caught that's the vibe] Buster: [mhmmm] Rio: [when you've got to go idk paint faces or some shit and you're so 😍 like 'scuse me kids] Buster: [we should decide what they all get though for the cute] Rio: [better be easter themed children] Buster: [you know Grace has gotta have the girliest flowery moment that popped up as soon as I opened pinterest] Rio: [all the pastels for easter which when did that become such a thing really] Buster: [Billie gotta be a bunny for those Carly mems cos she not too old ever to be not be about it] Rio: [you like 11, live your best life gal] Buster: [even if she was 21 she'd still do it lol] Rio: [obviously Junie won't, Edie should also be a bunny but a horror one with fake blood moment, Janis should have American football player stripes but in easter colours] Buster: [what's Ava gonna have?] Rio: [idk a sheep or something] Buster: [how adorable] Rio: [obvs there's other fam kids and kids there but we don't need to worry about y'all] Buster: [Devastated that Buster isn't that kind of bitch to get involved, where's jimothy when you need him] Rio: [lmao, when her mans probably would so she has to awkwardly be up in his grill] Buster: [your actual bae just like 😒 and starting a fight with Nance cos he's annoyed] Rio: [joy of joys, like lads you need to go now] Buster: [at least they probably would eat next cos it's usually a lunch time vibe like christmas so they'd have to go then] Rio: [exactly, you can't invite that many extra people to a roast so soz] Buster: [there's so many people already good lord] Rio: [mhmm] Buster: [leave, get out! in my best jojo impression] Rio: [the casual relief] Buster: [we all know he's gonna try and kiss her goodbye and she's gonna switch it to a cheek one, take the hint Daniel] Rio: [we all know this has been v awkward no one be living] Buster: [at least there's so many adults round this table that you can accidentally touch because in each other's grill] Rio: [we're talking multiple tables and still being on top of each other, that's the vibe] Buster: [exactly so you're welcome for that lads] Rio: I miss you Buster: [putting his hand on her leg because same] Rio: [putting her hand over his] Buster: [smiling cos we wanna] Rio: [can't stop us smiling fam] Buster: [if anyone's looking just make a silly face at your fave sister it's fine] Rio: am I gonna have to talk to Nancy Buster: I keep telling you, you don't have to do anything, babe Rio: She looks 😠 Buster: That's her resting bitch face Rio: [😏] Rio: shh Buster: [does something a little bit saucy under the table] Buster: I will if you can Rio: Easy Rio: [definitely not but you don't want him to stop so] Buster: [going a little bit harder because you don't wanna stop either so you're not gonna go too hard and risk that] Rio: [just shifting forward in your seat, biting your lip lowkey] Buster: [when you have to just sneak a look because maintaining eye contact how you want is not an option rn] Rio: [when that lowkey makes it so much worse in a good way] Buster: [we're having a good time finally] Rio: [you gonna have to try and talk 'cos you ain't this unsociable so enjoy that lol] Buster: [he'd be loving that] Rio: You're very mean Buster: Not yet Rio: [look like ?/oh no] Buster: [going IN rn soz babe hope you're not mid-sentence] Rio: [just try not to die honestly] Buster: [and when you can have coherent thoughts think about how you're gonna get your own back] Rio: You're just the worst, you know Buster: Yeah, I know Rio: What am I meant to do now Rio: you can't just Buster: What do you wanna do? Rio: You know exactly what I wanna do Buster: So come on Rio: they haven't even brought out dessert yet Buster: And you really want a piece of cake, yeah? Buster: That's exactly what you want Rio: Obviously not Rio: but you're timing is rude and that's exactly why you did it Buster: I did it 'cause I wanted to and you wanted me to Buster: The timing's just a bonus Rio: [gives him a faux 😒 look 'cos you can do that freely] Rio: for you, perhaps Rio: I'm just over here, needy as hell Buster: [leaves the table like he's got a phone call he really needs to take because real and baze energy] Buster: So come on Rio: where am I going? Rio: really strict diet so I can't even look at cake? 🤔 Buster: Where makes sense? Buster: It's your house, you tell me Buster: But nobody'll believe that you need or think you need to go on a diet, try again Rio: I'd hope no one is gonna need to go to my room for anything any time soon Rio: Do you reckon your parents will wanna head off before coffee is being offered or? Buster: Not unless your mum makes a really shit one Rio: Okay, 'cos I could say I'm not feeling great but not if you're gonna be here for a while yet Rio: I don't wanna be stuck in my room without you, like Buster: Throw a drink on yourself, you'll have to get changed then Rio: Don't you like my dress? Buster: I like you more Buster: And if you're willing to sacrifice it, I'll make sure it's a worthwhile one Rio: Okay Rio: wait for me Buster: [a picture of him chilling in her room casually like yep I am] Rio: you look so good there Buster: I feel good here, I'll miss it Rio: Me too Buster: We've got time to make loads more memories here yet though Rio: [show up 'cos yep] Buster: [you're gonna have to be quick lads so make every second count] Rio: [also gonna put that jewelry on even if we have to take it off after] Buster: [the perfect moment to find that he's hidden it in your bed for you and yeah she can put it on cos gotta serve a new lewk so we can just pretend it's part of that] Rio: [they're just in love ah this is gonna be so hard for you lads] Buster: [you know he's putting that jewellery on for you and redressing you even though he should just leave] Rio: [we always doing the most to drag things out without getting caught] Buster: [gonna make her leave first anyway even though this is literally her room cos she's more social and would hurry back in any circumstance whereas he's a rude hoe and nobody would be shook if he was on the phone for an age] Rio: [gonna save him some dessert 'cos any lil way you can low-key be nice 'cos you are typically nicer in people's eyes] Buster: [that's so sweet] Rio: Come say bye to me properly Buster: I would if Granddad wasn't mid-story Rio: I see how it is Rio: 😏 Rio: well I'm going to my dad's so when you're finished Buster: When he's finished, you mean Rio: same thing Rio: apparently 😜 Buster: You want me to burn this bridge for you, yeah? Buster: Alright, when I ain't allowed to move in, you'll only have yourself to blame, babe Rio: Don't be silly Rio: I'll wait Buster: Me too Buster: When are you back? Rio: Probably not 'til you're gone, that's what I'm saying, boy Buster: You should've led with that Rio: why did you think I needed you to say goodbye Rio: I'm not just nipping out Buster: Don't go Rio: You'll be going soon enough Rio: we have to do it at some point Buster: Soon isn't now Rio: I have to go though Buster: Your mum won't make you Rio: Of course not Rio: that's not the point Rio: I have to spend time with them too, I've got two families Buster: Come on Rio: What? Buster: Your dad is a prick, Rio Rio: You don't get to talk about him Buster: I have to Rio: You don't have to say anything Buster: I do though, 'cause you're the one who gets hurt by him for still caring Rio: That's my business Rio: and he's still my dad, end of Buster: He'll still be your dad if you stay here Rio: Well I'm not Buster: [showing up to give her the most intense look of all time] Rio: [arms folded like what?] Buster: [putting his around her of course] Rio: ['say it then' but so quiet] Buster: [pulls her closer to him because cannot] Rio: [hugs him back the tightest] Buster: [keeping this going for the longest time cos we having emotions] Rio: ['what time's your flight tomorrow?'] Buster: [let's say it's early cos Baze have shit to do] Rio: [quiet for a bit like thought as much vibes but also thinking 'maybe on my way back, you can come out for five and see me?'] Buster: [nods because we all know he's gonna make that happen regardless] Rio: [overly cheery like great we have a plan 'cos now you don't have to commit to that goodbye] Buster: [gotta do what you gotta do kids especially if that's delaying the heartbreaking inevitable] Rio: [off you go to see your dad who clearly did not show to church] Buster: [have fun with that babe] Rio: [not to mention creepy Drew and shit nan, we living lol] Buster: [are the others going or just Rio like oh hey] Rio: [maybe the twins should have to but I feel like Junie is already like no thank you] Buster: [I feel that because all the more reason for Rio to go cos she's not just gonna leave the twins with any of them] Rio: [exactly and they're probably creating 'cos don't wanna either so then it's more stress than it would be just showing as is] Buster: [so soz that Buster is adding to it by not wanting you to go gal] Rio: [none of us wanna but this the life we're living of forcing effort upon Caleb 'cos thinking the twins might still want it even though we're already like eurgh] Buster: [mhmm and we don't even have Gus to soften the blow so please stay the fuck back shit nan except you won't because Caleb is basically always just making you do everything for these children] Rio: [when we pretending it's 'cos the cousins are here so you didn't wanna go but really it's just this hell fam and you're the only one old enough to properly grin and bear it Buster: [poor Rio in so many ways rn] Rio: [just making excuses for Junie like he's working so hard at school always 'cos 1. not not true and 2. she'll love that 'cos smart boy but we know he just can't hack the blatant homophobia] Buster: [tea, and when you should wanna see Edie and Billie cos they're Drew's kids and he's your son too effectively but you don't] Rio: [when we truly pretending they don't exist like the delusion] Buster: [it's so fucked] Rio: [and rude, and we blame Ali for having these white children for them not being together still, like that's what Caleb ever wanted and like they're not fucking Drews like okay lmao] Buster: [don't even go there on the shit she would say about Carly, my sweet summer child] Rio: [shit nan I'm soz your life is so busted who you fooling here but yourself] Buster: [but before we get derailed do you wanna leave this here?] Rio: [we probably can like they'd talk whilst she's there probably but we don't have to do that up to you] Buster: [we know the vibe, you love and miss each other and we wish none of this was happening in terms of him having to leave] Rio: [yeah she's not gonna spill loads on this whole dad situ after how it went just now so nothing of note would be said tbh] Buster: [we're not there yet, one day lads]

1 note · View note

punkscowardschampions · 4 years

Text

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: 👍? Jimmy: you? Janis: what kind of answer isn't that, boy 😏 Jimmy: what kind of question were it in the first place, girl? Janis: honestly, try and be a good host Janis: you just want me to be shit Jimmy: that's not what I want Janis: Go on, you've got me interested Jimmy: What, you're not riveted by Gracie's IRL storytime? 😱😱 Janis: if I was, I'd be subscribed Jimmy: OMG you're NOT suchanathlete69??! Jimmy: that's awkward Janis: Catfished again Janis: unlucky, mate Jimmy: did wonder why you were saving your best chat for them late night 🗨 we were having Janis: 🙄 Hilarious Janis: obviously you'd have got none if I'd have known you were coolguy666 Jimmy: 💔 Janis: I know Janis: welcome for the pain for your art Jimmy: #whenyourmusenevertakesadayoff Janis: this is a business trip Jimmy: owe you a golf holiday, I know Jimmy: gonna have to proper unwind for a bit as only a rich girl can Janis: No, no Janis: golf trips are boys only clubs Janis: 💔 💀👑 Jimmy: poor baby Janis: please never call her that Jimmy: you don't think it's a goer? reckon she'd 💕 it Janis: 🤢 Janis: she doesn't 💕 you, soz Jimmy: I'd obvs say it in her daddy's accent, not that thick Janis: Stop 😂 Janis: we cannot afford to pull over Jimmy: he ain't driving that fast, let's just jump out Janis: I know her voice IS that annoying Jimmy: could easily drown her out, mine's worse Janis: nah Janis: no 🥇 for you on that one Jimmy: [nudges her like rude] Janis: [nudges him back like it's a compliment, idiot] Jimmy: [a look like it's not one of your best 😏] Janis: [a look like you want my best rn?] Jimmy: [a LOOK] Janis: [just the longest LOOK back ever but then looking at the fam like 😒 ugh] Jimmy: [just touching her 😒 face so she's looking at him again like forget them] Janis: [makes a lil noise like oh, but then so 😍] Jimmy: [a lil kiss but really soft and quick so nobody else notices] Janis: you are so Jimmy: you are Janis: no you Jimmy: [kisses her again less softly or quickly because no you] Janis: [goes in like dgaf fam] Jimmy: [y'all can deal we know Grace is the only one who's bothered and she's seen worse/is chatting away] Janis: better? Jimmy: how do you want me to answer that? Janis: truthfully Janis: obvs Jimmy: [shakes his head because we know any time they kiss he just wants to kiss more #mood but she could read that no as he's not gonna answer] Janis: [is a bit like ?? but shrugs like okay] Jimmy: [I like to think he's about to say something but then his phone is going off cos all that fam drama whenever he goes anywhere] Janis: [just sitting there, not knowing what the craic is #always] Jimmy: [sums up this era so accurately] Janis: do you reckon that lot are even in the car yet Jimmy: probably still trying to fit the tall one's body in the boot Janis: great Janis: HATE when you have to wait for the gals to decapitate ⏲😩 Jimmy: I'll tell 'em to crack on Janis: 'cos they always listen to you Jimmy: duh Janis: you'll need at least (1) sports car for those privileges Jimmy: better get to nicking one then Janis: oh yeah Janis: gonna be loads rocking up Jimmy: Challenge accepted, Jules Janis: know I said it was a business trip Janis: but gonna be suspicious if you don't at least pretend to enjoy the tunes Jimmy: 🥇 but it'll still be a stretch Janis: you got this, babe Jimmy: 🏆💪 Janis: all tight tanks and short shorts, is it Janis: gotcha Jimmy: [😏] Jimmy: can't bully you into wearing pjs everywhere Janis: too right Janis: well soft, you Jimmy: [pushes her like oi but deliberately really softly] Janis: [😏] Janis: I might've brought a pair Janis: if you're lucky Jimmy: don't sound like me, that Jimmy: not a paddy Janis: then I'm gonna be well cold in our tent tonight Jimmy: not gonna let that happen Jimmy: what kind of fake boyfriend would do Janis: one who's busy jacking cars maybe Jimmy: fancy cars have heated seats, you'll be alright Jimmy: on or off my lap Janis: on Janis: thanks Jimmy: [pulls her onto his lap now so casually] Janis: [snuggles into him as casually like, could be warmer] Jimmy: [puts his arms around her like he's doing it for warmth but we know he's just pulling her closer too] Janis: alright, I'll trust you Jimmy: alright, I might be a bit lucky Janis: you can be Jimmy: [such a LOOK] Janis: I can't wait to be alone with you again Jimmy: you sure we can't pull over? Janis: can you reach the break from here? Janis: [reaching her leg over like she's gonna but they are obviously nowhere near] Jimmy: [just looking at her like well you moving about is not helping] Janis: [is fully aware and enjoying it herself] Jimmy: [whispers in her ear that he hates her because we can't say what we really wanna say] Janis: [#into it and having to do the most to hide it from the whole van rn] Janis: you're so rude Jimmy: how am I? Jimmy: it's you Janis: you started it Jimmy: it's your fault Janis: it's not my fault you look like that Janis: or feel like Jimmy: but you're so Jimmy: that's nowt to do with me Janis: it's everything to do with you Jimmy: alright maybe a bit Jimmy: I just Janis: I know Jimmy: do you? Janis: [a LOOK up like don't I?] Jimmy: [just gonna kiss her so you don't say something you shouldn't thank you boy] Janis: [a moment] Janis: Me too Jimmy: [looking at her because she's so beautiful it's killing us all] Janis: [when you can never keep looking as long as he can so you move somehow closer to hide] Jimmy: [making it so she has to look at you, excuse you sir cos you're shamelessly hot about it, as if all the eye contact in the world will do the job of telling her you love her so you don't have to do it #ifonly] Janis: [when you literally cannot and you go way too hard 'cos you have no other option because what can you say] Jimmy: [excuse them rn everyone, thank god Grace is loud af whether she's still talking or blasting music or both lol] Janis: [at least the camper does offer a degree of privacy too you two are clearly in the back alone] Jimmy: [mhmm you're all very welcome for that] Janis: ['can you be quiet?' when you're so serious suddenly 'cos the need is so real] Jimmy: [nods but like can you actually boy I am less convinced] Janis: [do your best lads 'cos we doing this regardless tbh] Jimmy: [you must've been pretty quiet in that kitchen the other day as his brother and sister were in the next room then, you can do this] Janis: [we believe in you, in his ear whilst she can still trust herself to whisper though, 'I'm gonna make it so hard for you'] Jimmy: [already biting his lip because you can't be making a noise that fast #challengeaccepted but he obvs wants to and would've] Janis: [biting his ear lobe at the same time 'cos forever a thing now for all those #mems 'it was never hard to fake this part, you know' 'cos we all know that was never fake 'cept the very first time 'you're so fucking wantable'] Jimmy: ['its so different with you' even as a whisper you can imagine how his voice sounds cos as much as he meant that like he's so over all the girls in his DMs telling him how hot he is etc that 100% isn't ALL he means, likewise he doesn't just mean this is so different from the fake and we all know it #emotions] Janis: [when it's obviously exactly the same for you and it's been known since the first kiss so it throws you when he says it 'cos still just think you're broken or something at this point and you really wanna ask really so he says it again but you don't wanna give yourself away so you just go in 'cos you need all the moments] Jimmy: [safer that both of you don't talk for a bit tbh] Janis: [deffo gonna be saying his name though like it's the only word you know casually] Jimmy: [so into it, she was not wrong about making it hard for him to shhhh] Janis: [so into that, soz to everyone else we know they do not care] Jimmy: [glad as I am Harold is not turning up at this festival always a bit gutted because you need to know just how much you can't compete sir] Janis: [foreals, though it should be obvious with how hard you're being ignored/she's not hitting you up] Jimmy: [just Mia in his DMs what a downgrade] Janis: [when even her intentions aren't pure, poor boy lmao] Jimmy: [I'm sure there's also loads of girls from your own school, I don't feel sorry for you boy] Janis: [no one should] Jimmy: [he's a bad egg] Janis: [and not even bringing it sexually, rude] Jimmy: [he and Mia so #fated cos she's obvs not either] Janis: [imagine they got together together if Mia wasn't cray] Jimmy: [they're getting as together as she ever does, being in love with her dad and everything, like he'll last longer than anyone else has] Janis: [awh, get married guys] Jimmy: [thank god they can't have babies cos imagine] Janis: [gutted y'all won't be invited to the wedding and baby shower] Jimmy: [so glad she's as barren so she can't have a child just to hurt Grace when that all comes out] Janis: [the levels of petty] Jimmy: [she'd be gutted she can't force one of the others to do it] Janis: [do not need that level of drama ty ladies] Jimmy: [anyway is there any other shit we wanna do with JJ before they get there?] Janis: [we know the vibe, in their happy bubble now 'til they have to deal with the flat whites again] Jimmy: [ignore your fam for as long as you can as well boy, you need a break] Janis: [do we wanna hit the flat white points in here or ref on socials or a mix of?] Jimmy: [we can probably do both cos plenty of slagging off of them to be done] Janis: [right, what do we wanna do first, what makes most sense, Asia maybe, or Mia] Jimmy: [we said that Mia hits that first aid tent pretty fast for the attention so we could do that first] Janis: [lego 👍] Janis: don't you fancy being 🥇 nurse? Janis: sure you can plump a pillow better than any of them 😏 Jimmy: that'll be why I'm legging it in the other direction Jimmy: she's getting too used to having me about as is Jimmy: and I've only got a 💀💀💀 pact with you Jimmy: unless 👵👴💕 come asking Janis: treat 'em mean is her whole thing, she'll 👀 your game from a mile off, like Janis: and I'll keep mine out for any 👵👴 that are down with the kids Jimmy: 🤞 Janis: d'ya reckon we could convince her 💊 were sleeping tabs or Jimmy: challenge accepted Janis: though if she tells me she loves me, I will need the med tent for real 🤢 Jimmy: me an' all Jimmy: 💔 Janis: don't lie Janis: all you want is her love, be like you doubled your dose Jimmy: steady on Jimmy: can't all pile into first aid Janis: not getting in no tent with them again Janis: the ☁ of fucking glitter and 'perfume' was worse than tear gas Janis: gonna have flashbacks Jimmy: Baby Jimmy: I get it, you already ✨ eh, vampire girl Janis: any more glow would just be showing off Janis: not like me, obvs Jimmy: don't sound like you at all Jimmy: [but kisses her] Janis: you tryna save me, yeah Jimmy: got some first aid skills of my own Jimmy: 🏆 Janis: [😏] Janis: can we keep that between us Janis: or they'll all be faking it Jimmy: they were warned only one of you is getting mouth to mouth ages ago Janis: her man ain't here so Janis: you're well in Jimmy: ⏲💔😭 Jimmy: [playfully pushes her out of the way like I g2g] Janis: me that's 💔💔💔 Janis: dickhead Jimmy: [pulls her into a hug that's meant to be OTT but is just real] Janis: [when you can't even pretend to push him away] Jimmy: ['I told you ages ago, I just want you' as a whisper in her ear but with kisses in between the words like the first time he said it for those mems] Janis: [the 😍 are so real, at least they must be somewhere nearby but definitely not for their benefit really we know 'good'] Jimmy: [we know he's giving them back] Janis: [they need to be dragged to an artist they 100% don't wanna see rn] Jimmy: [10000% cos for him that's literally all of them and I vote she sees community service girl with her 📷 but she doesn't see them cos busy and Janis makes sure Jimothy don't see her lol lol] Janis: [tbh, we all know there's ways of doing that, namely dancing with him, even if the music is far too shit so you have to make your own rhythm] Jimmy: [he's only got 👀s for her at the best of times so it's really not a challenge to distract him lol] Janis: [this can be when Ella freaks out too, when you and Mia just wanna be alone in the tent lmao you seem SO gay] Jimmy: [oh ladies] Janis: 🖖🕙✂ Jimmy: ? Janis: contenders for love's young dream Jimmy: you and Mr Lucas got a better shot Jimmy: 🎯💕 Janis: sure, he's less 💀 than them but young is still a stretch Jimmy: he's too young for me Janis: who isn't Janis: dead fussy Jimmy: we can't all be as unfussy as the #squad Jimmy: 💀#2 excluded Janis: you can say slags, it's alright Janis: never hear you over this racket Jimmy: [shouts it because that nerd] Janis: [loling] Jimmy: didn't have their hearing checked Jimmy: shit nursing that Janis: your standards are very high, it's been known Janis: [OTT smug face like look at me] Jimmy: [twirls her around because nerd] Janis: [fully have a nerdy dance moment and knock into people be those dicks 'cos the level you do not care about anyone else ever] Jimmy: [literally nobody else here as far as you two are concerned] Janis: [until we blow that up anyway] Jimmy: [speaking of I like to think Grace is starting to put the moves on whatever guy she ends up pulling to annoy Mia cos not there to stop her] Janis: [telling her all about his band and set, like how fascinating] Jimmy: [the fam she's grown up in, boy she knows] Janis: [when you realize none of 'em are paying attention now, Asia's probably missing and the two left are flirting so you see your chance] Janis: wanna go find some overpriced food n drink? Jimmy: stop calling me fat OMG 😱😱 Janis: [pokes his non-existent belly 'cos you ain't even with how much you smoke/general decent genetics, lucky] Janis: that's what we 💗 about you Janis: make us look better Jimmy: first off, Asia couldn't look any better, tah very much 👻💕 Jimmy: second, piss off you Janis: 🤞 an opportune date rapist has thought so too and we won't have to see her 'til tomorrow Janis: [going in the direction of the food trucks etc] Jimmy: [following her obvs] Janis: [holding her hand back like 'don't get lost'] Jimmy: [giving her look like he might find Asia but boy we all know you'd be gutted instead of thrilled if you did, stop playing] Janis: [gesturing with your free hand like be my guest, but 😒 face with it] Jimmy: [return of the pouty lip kiss thing because he can't even pretend he wants anyone else at this point] Janis: [enjoy your moment being so in everyone's way in this crowd] Jimmy: [we know you love it] Janis: [stay back community service gal] Jimmy: [we're not ready for you yet hun] Janis: [well you are gonna have to shoot your shot soon 'cos this is only a weekend but ignoring you rn thanks 'cos full on alone time 'cos the flat whites are being messy by themselves] Jimmy: [soz jj have gotta do the most so it's the most awkward when you do appear] Janis: [oosh she's gonna be so mad, already mad you're here like no you ain't allowed lol] Jimmy: [like I think she should do something at the last possible moment so then it's like raw af when they gotta leave] Janis: [I vibe] Jimmy: [so for now you can be happy nerds until Asia's bf appears and is like ??] Janis: [oh sir, you don't even know] Jimmy: [they'd both be so relieved you're not Harry though tbh] Janis: [#bffs probably checking his socials so hard making sure he looks busy somewhere else like] Jimmy: [she can be doing that while he's having a text argument with either his dad or sister casually] Janis: [awkward if he saw that out of context] Jimmy: [OMG should we] Janis: [why not yo] Jimmy: [let's say he goes to take her phone to look at something on Cass' socials cos she's blocked him as a fuming 12 year old would and that's how he sees it cos you know he's not gonna ask if he can borrow it just take it like a rude hoe] Janis: [when you're just like excuse me, taking it back 'cos you lowkey aren't even thinking how that looks] Jimmy: [looking at her like EXCUSE YOU cos of how it does look] Janis: [taking what would seem like a rude amount of time to get it like ? then just pshing like oh please] Janis: checking he ain't coming Jimmy: 👍 Janis: really Janis: what is up with you? Jimmy: [just shaking his head because fuming] Janis: ['what?' and a look like I know this cannot be about him rn] Jimmy: leave it out Janis: you can read my messages if you like, 'cos I ain't sent him none Jimmy: I don't wanna read whatever bollocks he reckons is top 🍑📞 Jimmy: you're alright Janis: yeah, me either Jimmy: don't wanna hear your protests either Jimmy: @ Bill's 👻 Janis: Don't be a dick 🙄 Jimmy: you only about it when he's doing it? Janis: yeah, obviously Jimmy: 👌 Janis: seriously Janis: so you're gonna be in a mood now, for what Jimmy: for what? Jimmy: are you serious? Janis: I told you why I was looking at his shit, why do you have an issue with that? Jimmy: you weren't gonna say nowt til I caught you at it Jimmy: how's that to start with? Janis: don't make it sound like something it ain't Janis: it's irrelevant as long as he's not showing up, that's why Jimmy: bollocks Jimmy: you being glued to your screen ain't irrelevant Janis: for fuck's sake Janis: I'm not glued to my screen Jimmy: not now, dickhead Janis: oh, you want me to be loving this convo more Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: wow, please tell me more Janis: 😍 Jimmy: go back to working out where he is Jimmy: never seen you care so much about owt else Janis: because I don't want to fucking see him Jimmy: check out his socials a bit harder while you're saying that Jimmy: see if you can really take the piss Janis: [walking off from wherever they're currently situated] Janis: fuck this then Jimmy: Great talk, babe Janis: don't talk to me then Janis: and don't fucking babe me Janis: as bad as that lot now Jimmy: Yeah I got the message that you don't wanna 🗨 Jimmy: could always block me like you ain't done him Janis: What do you want me to say then Janis: 'cos you ain't listened to fuck all I have Jimmy: I heard you Janis: don't believe me then Jimmy: you easy could've said to me, check he ain't coming Janis: why would I when I can do it myself and not bother you Jimmy: you don't wanna see him, there's a reason Janis: he's a prick? Jimmy: is that a question? Janis: hardly Jimmy: you think I can't handle him or what? Janis: Obviously not Janis: you did, didn't you Jimmy: what then? Janis: it didn't make any sense to me to have you thinking about him and if he might come and all Janis: that's it Jimmy: like I weren't Janis: well that can't be put on me Janis: or do, whatever Jimmy: I give a shit about what you do and don't want Jimmy: do what you want with that Janis: then believe me when I say I don't want him Jimmy: Alright Janis: is it or not Jimmy: I said alright Jimmy: come back Janis: not yet Jimmy: please Janis: don't do that Jimmy: I'm sorry Janis: it's fine Janis: whatever Jimmy: it's not Janis: I just need Janis: some fresh air Jimmy: I get it, everyone's doing my head in but you Jimmy: I didn't mean to do yours in an' all Janis: you mean 'til you caught me hoeing I weren't Janis: are you alright? Jimmy: I mean you weren't, that's why I said it Jimmy: you're not Jimmy: I were doing my own head in about that dickhead, you did nowt Janis: we can count him as a no-show, anyway Janis: not stalking him in vain Jimmy: yeah Janis: don't make me sound as cliche to say he ain't worth the mental energy Jimmy: don't make me sound as cliche as some dickhead who's only bothered by a bigger dickhead Janis: he's just some dickhead Janis: this town is full of 'em Jimmy: like I said Jimmy: ain't got the 🎻🎻 out for him Janis: well I don't need it, tah Jimmy: not playing you a song either, girl Janis: yeah, I noticed you didn't answer my question Jimmy: probably don't need answering then Janis: your mood is obvious, obvs Janis: you could give me a why Jimmy: I did Jimmy: I said everyone's doing my head in Janis: yeah Janis: beyond the obvious everyone and their standard annoying bullshit or Jimmy: depends Janis: depends on what Jimmy: what else you've noticed Jimmy: I dunno what's obvious to you or what bullshit you reckon is my standard Janis: 🔎🔎 Janis: that'd be telling Jimmy: there you go then Janis: take some of their drink Janis: doing them and us a favour Jimmy: 👍 Janis: it'll make you feel better Jimmy: weren't arguing Jimmy: no need to convince me, mate Janis: it's my calling Jimmy: don't give up 🏃 Janis: most people hear have heard the good word Janis: then some, state of 'em Jimmy: but have they heard Bill's? Janis: it's his 🌍 babe Janis: we're all just players Jimmy: I know Jimmy: I'm already a fan Janis: hipster scum Jimmy: it's my calling Janis: 😏 Jimmy: 😎🚬 Janis: good idea too Janis: don't need to tell you that though Jimmy: just did Janis: do plenty of things I don't need to Jimmy: you wanting a 🏆 for that or what? Janis: you wanted me to come back a second ago, dickhead Jimmy: I still want you to come back Janis: then don't sass me Janis: you are well becoming one of them Jimmy: saying that ain't gonna stop me wanting you back Jimmy: however many times you compare me to them slags Janis: shout it again so I know it's real? Jimmy: [does] Janis: [comes back from wherever she was, not that far away like 👏] Jimmy: [just looking at her like he hasn't seen her for a thousand years] Janis: [just coming over and hugging him in a way that is clearly genuine] Jimmy: [hugging her back really tightly even if he has to put that stolen vodka down to do it] Janis: ['I just want you too, alright'] Jimmy: [when you gotta kiss her because overwhelmed by emotions because we only got that cheating ex is our past no ride or die and no crying at the festival boy] Janis: [we just always kissing so we can't admit the obvious right now god bless] Jimmy: [both of you acting like you're shit with words but we know the truth is you're scared to say anything too hardcore because you're not shit with words at all] Janis: [mhmm] Jimmy: [just not letting her go cos you're a clingy bitch] Janis: [doing that thing where you're backwards and just let him walk you around as one to cheer him] Jimmy: [feeding her some vodka because why let her do it herself when you can and make it a moment] Janis: [#aboutit even if you gotta be like 😏 'you trying to get me drunk?'] Jimmy: ['not much of a challenge that' forever calling her a pisshead and/or lighweight but smiling] Janis: ['wrong twin' and an OTT pissed off face whilst you return the vodka favour] Jimmy: [loling don't choke boy] Janis: ['I don't find it funny, thank you very much' but not actually mad] Jimmy: [tickling her to try and make her laugh too] Janis: [tryna escape but not that hard moment] Jimmy: [you know he's gotta make it hot and pin her up against something soz not soz] Janis: [when those #mems hit and you're 😳] Jimmy: [telling her you missed her even though she was only gone for a hot sec cos you're highkey] Janis: ['you are such a headfuck' followed by the most torturously slow kiss ever 'cos this whole situation got you like] Jimmy: [SUCH a noise because torture is right] Janis: [going at it like you're mad at him] Jimmy: [enjoy it cos we gonna make all that Asia drama happen soon] Janis: [oh Asia you fool, I like to think the people who's tent you're in don't even know that you're there like they're just chilling with a BBQ or whatever] Jimmy: [same though] Janis: [but your mans clearly thinks you're cheating on him so you getting dumped, poor hoe] Jimmy: [Mia and Ella would have totally encouraged him to believe that] Janis: [gotta let them have some victories, sadly] Jimmy: [I do love what a shit time you anorexic gays are clearly having though] Janis: [yes, overall this has been worth it, not that JJ are gonna care about that once we fuck this all up with community service girl but still] Jimmy: [soz lads] Janis: [hohaha it works out in the end so got to be done] Jimmy: [you gotta be pushed or you'll be fwb until you're like 23] Janis: [and there are babies to be had just you wait lmao] Jimmy: [beautiful af babies] Janis: [but for today, Asia drama pops off] Jimmy: [when he's gonna be worried cos he's a good boy not because he's 😍 thank you gals] Janis: [the level of 👀 they'll all be] Jimmy: [like soz he's triggered by her just disappearing shut your mouths ladies] Janis: [all be looking and shouting and pissing people off who are tryna kip probably like be those hoes] Jimmy: [how drunk the flat whites are I can't even] Janis: [Janis like 'I'll stay here in case she comes back' 'cos cannot be seen with them/does not care about Asia we all know lol] Jimmy: [when you don't wanna be separated but you have to go look because the squad can't be trusted to do fuck all rn] Janis: Godspeed Jimmy: Tah Janis: don't let lizard boy get in a punch up Janis: 'less you're gonna film it for me Jimmy: he couldn't throw a punch if you 💰 him, rich girl Jimmy: but if some dickhead gives him a smack, I'll obvs get my 📷 out Janis: maybe I will Janis: make it worth him coming down Jimmy: 👍 Janis: what's 👎 Jimmy: what kind of question's that? Janis: what do you mean Jimmy: what I said Janis: are you actually worried about her Jimmy: shut up Janis: fuck off telling me to shut up Janis: you know she's just carrying on the party somewhere else Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: fine Janis: be a dick Jimmy: lasses first Janis: what, 'cos I'm not gonna freak out over wherever Asia is sucking dick and getting more white-girl wasted Jimmy: just leave it out Janis: have fun with that then Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: 👌 Janis: had no idea you were such an amateur Jimmy: Piss off Janis: really Janis: see if Mia needs anything whilst you're at it, like Jimmy: yeah alright Janis: 👌 Jimmy: in a bit then Janis: if you're lucky Janis: depends if you're personally gonna check every tent Jimmy: stop being a dickhead Janis: I'm not, you're being a mug Jimmy: 🎻🎻 Janis: idc, and you clearly love it Jimmy: obvs Jimmy: living laughing loving, me Jimmy: having a top time with my #lad BFF Janis: you fit right in, how many times can I say it Jimmy: as many times as you like Jimmy: wouldn't wanna piss on your parade Janis: yeah Janis: so considerate and caring Jimmy: I get it, you're gutted I'm not a massive bastard Jimmy: bit busy rn but I'll dry your eyes when I get back Janis: 'cos that makes sense Janis: don't bother, I don't need you Jimmy: don't bother to start talking sense now, you've been going on ages without any Janis: if you're so busy, then you don't have time to come at me with all this bullshit Jimmy: too right Jimmy: nowt left that needs to be said any road, you've well covered it Janis: yep Janis: go away now Jimmy: [does for ages because obvs they don't find Asia til the AM/way later we know and her bf is fuming and there's DRAMA and nobody notices that Jimothy is struggling with all this] Janis: [when you've just been here alone with nothing to do and no updates so you're casually fuming at all this] Jimmy: [just goes back into their tent because bye everyone he's so over y'all] Janis: [just lowkey shouting at them all to stfu with this bullshit now so he can get some peace] Jimmy: [get in your tent and sleep it off you hot messes] Janis: [just sat outside 'cos you aren't about to go in either tent like thanks so much for this gals] Jimmy: [just throwing a hoodie or whatever at her through the tent flap cos you know she's out there and it's been raining] Janis: [tapping the tent to say thanks 'cos you aren't gonna actually say it] Jimmy: [when you know they just sat on either side of this tent opening so casually how romeo and juliet of you] Janis: [the accidental drama of it all] Jimmy: [get drunker yourself boy that'll help SO MUCH honestly] Janis: [oh no no] Jimmy: [full of good ideas jimothy is] Janis: [when you just wanna go so bad but can't 'cos Asia's fucked that for you] Jimmy: [Oh Asia] Janis: [just picking up the shit they left outside and fucking it up/throwing it/losing it] Jimmy: [I don't blame you babe, go off] Janis: [gotta do something yo] Jimmy: [I'm just gonna leave him in here marding, much less productive] Janis: I'm going for a walk alright Jimmy: Alright Janis: you need anything? Jimmy: Like what? Janis: Shoes, is a good one Janis: more bottles, less likely but maybe Jimmy: I don't need owt off you Janis: alright Janis: your loss Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: have my 😭 when you've gone Janis: no thanks Jimmy: on you go then Janis: weren't waiting on your permission Jimmy: weren't giving it Janis: just keep the search party away and it doesn't matter either way Jimmy: not your bodyguard Jimmy: or theirs Janis: yeah sure Jimmy: meaning what? Janis: meaning tell yourself that then Jimmy: fuck you Janis: wow Jimmy: find someone else to take the piss out of while you're out and about Janis: I'm not the one that's taking the piss out of you Jimmy: bollocks Janis: No, not bollocks Janis: have I had you running 'round this entire place after me Janis: no Jimmy: I'd go looking for you whether or not you reckon it makes me a twat Janis: it makes you a twat for them Jimmy: she's an fucking idiot Jimmy: not gonna just leave her Janis: She's managed to keep herself alive just fine 'til now Janis: how is it your job Jimmy: what so I'm a knobhead when I'm not on the clock? Jimmy: tah Janis: oh whatever Janis: I can't be bothered with this Jimmy: Why do you care if I look for her for a bit or not? Janis: I don't Janis: the question is why do you care Jimmy: It's what we're here for, for a start Jimmy: fake nice Jimmy: not that you can be bothered Janis: bullshit Janis: it's not fake, and even if it were, they're all too plastered to care or remember Jimmy: And what? Jimmy: You're jealous of her now Janis: get real Jimmy: you Janis: I am Janis: and I told you, this whole nice guy thing Janis: can't be bothered Jimmy: her boyfriend's at a loose end, crack on Jimmy: he's well more your type Janis: yeah you wish Jimmy: weren't a request Jimmy: I'm actually alright for threesomes as it goes Janis: and I'm alright without them or any of their sloppy seconds so piss off Jimmy: night then Janis: good chat Jimmy: won't get any 🏆 or owt but whatever Janis: I'll cope Jimmy: I'll live an' all Jimmy: 💔 to hear it, I know Janis: yeah Janis: 'cos if you ain't a 👼 you're that dick Janis: no inbetween Jimmy: it's you who's trying to shove a label on my head, when you ain't chucking me in a reusable coffee cup with them that is Janis: What are you trying to prove Jimmy: What are you on about? Jimmy: she's gone, I had a look for her 'cause her mates are too pissed, nowt else Janis: 👌 Jimmy: fuck's sake Janis: just go to bed Jimmy: you ain't put any more work into being my step mum Jimmy: let that dream 💀💀💀 Janet Janis: You're so funny Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt Janis: 🤐 then Jimmy: piss off with telling me what to do Janis: you're annoying Jimmy: yeah and you being a dickhead'll stop me Jimmy: good one Janis: what will Janis: seriously Jimmy: [stops replying like fine if that's how you want it seriously] Janis: [let's give you both a break] Jimmy: [we should say it's later and he's drunker and he's wandering around looking for her but in a more chill way than the flatwhites earlier so we're not waking half the campsite] Janis: [whereas she has been 'cos AM so nowt still officially on but people carrying on so she can be coming back] Jimmy: [awkwardly bumping into each other like] Janis: [literally 'cos can't straight up ignore him so just looking like oh, it's you] Jimmy: [looking at her like where the fuck have you been cos will never say it] Janis: ['I can't sit still'] Jimmy: ['I can't sleep'] Janis: ['why?'] Jimmy: [shrugs because so many reasons] Janis: [nods like #relatable] Jimmy: [nods like okay now I know you're alright I'll fuck off] Janis: [just looking at him like seriously 'this is stupid now'] Jimmy: [looking at her like it's been stupid this whole time] Janis: [walking alongside him like where are we going then 'cos you aren't just leaving] Jimmy: [god knows where they are actually going but he's sneaking looks at her with every step honey] Janis: [if you see it's 'cos you are too so can't say anything] Jimmy: ['I don't get why you're fuming at me' cos drunk enough we can just say it] Janis: [when you didn't take a bottle so you aren't at that level so you're more awkward but like alright, we're doing this, shrugs 'cos doesn't fully get it herself that's the tea 'I don't get what you really want'] Jimmy: ['from what?'] Janis: ['from-' gestures at herself then around them '-any of this, all of it, I knew, and then it changed, then I thought I knew again but then you do something or say something and I'm back at the start'] Jimmy: ['what did I do or say?'] Janis: [a look like, loads of stuff 'I've got to remind you?' and tapping his head and then the bottle like pisshead] Jimmy: ['I just mean-' stopping himself cos do you even know what you mean rn] Janis: [a sigh like fuck it, why not, 'cos he might not remember and tbh over the weirdness and tension so may as well 'you say you want me but then you trail after her for ages' shrugs 'we could've had fun instead'] Jimmy: ['it weren't like that' trying so hard not to owt all his secrets rn casually 'she could've been any of 'em' shakes his head at himself like he's remembering who they actually are 'except Mia, fuck her'] Janis: [lil 😏 but not committing to it 'cos still too awks and gah on this 'I know, do I have to be fair and logical about it though? Not good like you, fuck her'] Jimmy: ['I weren't thinking proper about it, you know what I'm like, full Shakespearean tragedy or nowt' shrugs like it's all such bants and it's so fine but he's obvs worried] Janis: ['You're just a nice person' shrugs like obviously, we're not here to debate that 'but-' making an actual ugh noise out loud 'cos can't believe you thinking like this, never mind saying it '-you say it's different with me, yeah? But you'd do that for anyone, and you just lump me in with them, like, how is it different...' looking away 'cos so mad at yourself and shamed] Jimmy: ['I've never lumped you in with them, that were you doing it to me' stops and looks at her 'you are different, from every other paddy dickhead I've met and a fair few northern ones an' all, I'm not just looking for you 'cause you're lost, I wanna be around you loads and I don't wanna be around anyone, even do my own head in, don't I?'] Janis: [not kissing him even though you (clearly) really, really want to, because you've been doing that when you're stopping yourself from saying what you want to but you're finally getting somewhere here and it doesn't feel shit, trying to actually say something in response though, is difficult 'cos OVERWHELMED 'I like you too'] Jimmy: [100% is 😳 and he's so white we all see it okay] Janis: [when he's so cute you gotta at least hug him 'so can we-' pausing 'cos about to say 'go back to how we were' but that's not exactly what you want so you're like umm '- you know, go back to our tent now?'] Jimmy: [hugging her back so hard like don't hurt yourself boy you're still not healed thank you 'we can do owt you want' sounds so casual but he's never meant anything more] Janis: ['I just wanna be with you, as long as it's alone, I don't care where'] Jimmy: [we handholding back to that tent because I don't think we can guarantee alone anywhere else] Janis: [we buzzing but we got some stuff we gotta say still so 'I'm sorry, you know, I was taking the piss a bit'] Jimmy: ['me an' all' because he is also sorry and was also taking the piss 'it does my head in like nowt else, fighting with you'] Janis: ['yeah' 'cos hard same 'it's just how I am with everyone else, it's easier to me than-' when you don't know what this is so we're just trailing off here '- but easier doesn't mean not shit'] Jimmy: ['I get it, all that nice lad bollocks, I get paid for it or get forced into it 'cause I don't want them turning into massive dickheads, like he is, and how I am, off the clock' when you just ranting about your fam casually now 'but I'm still doing the wrong thing for trying to get it right for myself for a bit' shrugs like so what can I do] Janis: [just letting him and listening because you can just about catch up to what he's saying here 'well, we don't have to spend no more time with this lot now and you don't have to fake nice to me, is that a start for some time just for you?'] Jimmy: [holds out the hand she's not holding like pinky promise me gal 'I ain't been faking nowt with you for ages' because tea that we can drunkenly spill] Janis: [does 'this shit is over' gestures towards their tents 'cos we can all see the squad turning to shit without you two needing to be involved 'good, 'cos I'd call you a liar if you said otherwise, I'd know if you were faking that, tah'] Jimmy: [the new dawn new day is gonna be messy for that lot we know 'will piss on their tent for you before we proper draw that line, if you like' because remember when she said he should] Janis: [lols 'so romantic'] Jimmy: [😍 which would seem so fake after she's said that but it's for the lol and how fucking cute she is] Janis: ['not gonna tell you where or where you can't piss, not that kinda fake girlfriend' 😏 'anyway I wrecked loads of their shit earlier so' shrugs like no room to talk] Jimmy: ['I were about to ask what kind you were, but that answers that' 😏 gives her the 🚬 from behind his ear like you a bad bitch I see] Janis: ['you've asked me that one before, only on special occasions, alright' loling again 'where are your sunglasses, like?'] Jimmy: [touches the top of his head like a nerd like nope they not there, looks down to see if they're on his top and pats his pockets, doing a more and more pouty face the longer the search goes on and he doesn't 'find' them] Janis: ['how do I even know it's the real you, honestly' then gasps dramatically like OMG 'Jamie?!' and being so 😍] Jimmy: [lols 'top news that some good'll come out of how our kid is probably scratching knobhead into 'em with her compass instead of doing her maths'] Janis: ['it's a look, sure you can style it out'] Jimmy: ['duh' in such a flat white voice] Janis: [shudders like #triggered 'don't, they're finally asleep and not annoying me'] Jimmy: [pretends like he's gonna shout slags but only whispers it cos doesn't want them to wake up either] Janis: ['far as dirty talk goes...' but is 😍 can't lie] Jimmy: [gets his empty bottle from earlier and spins it then kisses her really hardcore like it's a pisstake of how the flatwhites hook up but also a shameless excuse] Janis: [have at it kids, you've been waiting for ages by your standards] Jimmy: [I wanna volunteer that this is the first time he calls her baby not as a pisstake because drunk enough that he accidentally could do] Janis: [yas, here for that] Jimmy: [we crossing lines today] Janis: [and it feels so good] Jimmy: [mhmm] Janis: [step back homewrecker] Jimmy: [I'm so mad at her like yeah he's hot af but who do you think you are, this is not a James and Ava situation thank you] Janis: [lucky you ain't getting brawled tbh] Jimmy: [would love that] Janis: [we tryna be mature and show our feels in a better way though, tragically] Jimmy: [she isn't worth it anyways lbr like he's not even interested] Janis: [and they'll be done with community service soon they wouldn't have got that long so bye] Jimmy: [let the door hit you on your way out] Jimmy: [imagine their cute little disorientated sleepy faces though and how snuggled they'd be] Janis: [getting woken up by shouting is so confusing like 'scuse me hello???] Jimmy: [and once again lowkey triggering for my soft son] Janis: [we just staying snuggled 'til we work out what's going on and even then we ain't getting involved honey, just making a face like, called that] Jimmy: ['I've changed my mind, don't bother fucking him' we joking but we're also not because the voice is soft] Janis: [pushing his body with yours from a sleeping position, so also gently 'no scaly #kinkunlocked, idiot'] Jimmy: [pulling her closer again nbd] Janis: ['poor boy though, don't think it's even a record of shortest relationship for her' snuggling in harder without thinking about it 'cos they being so loud about their 💔 rn] Jimmy: [stroking her hair because it's comforting for them both 'do you wanna go get breakfast?' tea makes everything better that's facts] Janis: [#facts, nods 'they'll need to keep their energy up and all' 'cos remembering to be fake nice more whilst you're still here also the idea of throwing a sandwich at them like there you are is amusing her greatly] Jimmy: [we'll never know what amazing shade he was gonna reply with because a massive yawn instead cos you know they ain't had hardly any sleep] Janis: [Awh'ing at him, genuinely, and closing his eyes with her fingers like go back to sleep 'I'll find some earplugs for you, sleepy baby'] Jimmy: [holding onto her like DON'T GO without thinking about it] Janis: [is not going, just looking at him 'you shouldn't be allowed to look like that in the morning'] Jimmy: ['gotta keep up with you, girl' morning 😍] Janis: ['you don't have to try' the multiple meanings, love that] Jimmy: [does an IRL 🤏 like I do a bit] Janis: ['but I'm SUCH an athlete' 😏] Jimmy: ['help me up then' cos determined to get tea but would need help up cos those tricky ribs sleeping on the ground isn't really the one] Janis: [not to mention all the extra activities y'all have been getting up to on the ground, but helps him up, lol at them just scooting past like don't mind us you two] Jimmy: [god imagine, at least you can pretend you're wincing at that scene and the drama boy] Janis: [obvs notices 'you need another massage' looks about as they walking 'they probably have a tent here, like' 'cos the random hippie crap they do at festivals now be wild] Jimmy: [yeah even at small local ones like you know this is, the gimmicks be cray 'depends'] Janis: ['go on'] Jimmy: [draws two lines on her back like are you keeping a tally of how many I'll owe you or not] Janis: [shakes her head like nah 'I don't need nothing, besides, basically helping me with my homework so'] Jimmy: [draws the 🤓 in the same place but under whatever top she's wearing rn so it's against skin because harder to work out what he's drawing that's his excuse anyway lol] Janis: [has no idea what that was, the confusion and lol like boy what but also being like 'do it again' 'cos you want him to heheheh] Jimmy: [obvs does do it again slower like let's make this a moment] Janis: [so faux offended when she works it out 'shut up, I just like touching you'] Jimmy: ['gutted how I'd rate you don't actually count for nowt' cos she'd get that A+ honey] Janis: ['well you can tell Mr Joyce how good I am if you want but he'll just swear up and down he's NEVER made us massage each other for our mark, like'] Jimmy: ['til Mr Lucas comes through with the hours of footage, dickhead can't deny it then'] Janis: [loling 'dread to think what they have you do for art, babe'] Jimmy: ['yeah it's a proper laugh a minute, like' making a face because lord the bollocks he would have to do all jokes aside] Janis: ['he is an excellent life model though, be fair' the fakest wistful 😍 for Mr Lucas] Jimmy: ['that'll be why my dad put that one on the fridge' what a lovely mental image 'nowt to do with my talents'] Janis: [loling 'I'll try not to be offended he don't wanna look at me every day instead'] Jimmy: ['he does but can't be letting our kid get inspired by you an' all' mimes drawing a moustache and some devil horns on her even though we know Cass would probably do worse 'you're my muse' casually saying that like you're mine, we know] Janis: ['fair' 'cos we get it, dealt with a lot of siblings and a lot of siblings gf/bfs but not and never dealing with that so we coming at it with bants 'how much do muses get paid then, 50, 60?'] Jimmy: [IRL 🤔 winnie like he's so seriously considering for ages but then shrugs 'I gotta stay poor and you gotta stay rich' when you just saying you gonna give her all your money bye] Janis: ['gotta stay on brand, I get it' looking at the food trucks and tents like 🤔 Winnie herself 'they'll all bankrupt ya but may as well enjoy it'] Jimmy: [just 😍 so hard what is she even saying he don't know] Janis: [squishing his face like focus boy but you ain't mad, just getting in people's way, again, at least most people won't be up until the music starts again] Jimmy: [we know you there somewhere though with your coffee and your camera, community service gal] Janis: [ugh, have a tea you scumbag] Jimmy: [that's how you know they ain't #fated] Janis: [mhmm, she'd probably put the milk in first] Jimmy: [they only gonna talk about 📷 when they do see her cos only thing they have in common and all he's bothered about hearing from her] Janis: [like take a hint, it's not what you think it is, are you a flat white] Jimmy: [like I'M SORRY even when he's talking to you he's gonna be touching the bae so much unless she literally leaves, get a grip] Janis: [it's shameless, have you even talked to Janis or tried to] Jimmy: [blatantly scared of her aren't you babe] Janis: [like she hate you now but you know, not without reason, she'd definitely wanna leave but would probably stand her ground 'cos why should you just get to talk to him, be polite, madam, you can't] Jimmy: [1. even Grace was more subtle when she was leaving half the shit she owns at the CG 2.he don't wanna talk to you hun he don't wanna talk to anyone but her so excuse you 3. he blatantly would make NO indication that he wants Janis to leave hence holding her hand still/touching her all the time without even being aware of it really and like showing her the pics too/trying to include her in the convo like I should take a pic of you like this etc] Janis: [seriously, like this is so awkward and it's all your fault, probably in community service 'cos some girl scrapped with you 'cos you tryna steal her man] Jimmy: [go and hoe on pete he'd be about it, except don't cos he's too good for you too] Janis: [my boo says stay away, we aren't having you in the squad honey] Jimmy: [I like to think she finally makes her excuses/has some friends to get back to but like I said we all been knew she gonna try and chat to him in his DMs and get him to hang with them all later like a snek] Janis: [mhmm, we see you, hoe, also thanks for making this so awks now] Jimmy: [Jimothy just like 'bit weird she were here' cos boys are oblivious] Janis: ['is it?'] Jimmy: [a look like umm yeah? because he genuinely thinks it's a coincidence, oh boy] Janis: [shrugs 'small world, smaller town'] Jimmy: [shrugs back because he's already forgotten her and that's the tea, casually heading back to see what state the flat white drama has reached] Janis: [meanwhile we'll just be angsting don't mind us] Jimmy: [when you know she's quiet and it's different but you think she just doesn't wanna see the flat whites and is tired like you are so you just squeeze her hand like it's okay] Janis: [just the fakest smile, one that looks like a grimace, they're probably at the comforting stage so leave them to be extra about it, breathing out like 'thank fuck' Jimmy: [I like to think Grace shoots Janis a tiny look that nobody else sees like please kill me because so over it 5eva] Janis: [just 😏 and silently like good luck with that] Jimmy: [please can we say that when jimothy and community service girl cross paths again later Grace sees them and 'accidentally' does something to fuck with her like spill a drink on her/her camera whatever cos she's that clumsy bitch but she's also jj's biggest shipper on the low and it's never gonna get back to Janis but #defense squad regardless] Janis: [100% here for that] Jimmy: [she's a hoe and she 👀 you gal] Janis: [when you're that unsubtle] Jimmy: [for now though enjoy Asia crying too loud guys] Janis: [just having your breakfast in your tent like isn't this fun lmao] Jimmy: [getting his headphones and giving her one cos he's put on songs he knows she like because a babe] Janis: [literally anything over the sound of that lot] Jimmy: [you know they wireless cos it's the future so he doesn't have to sit as close as he is] Janis: [just looking at him silently saying as much but turning it into #bants like you think he's tryna steal your food like get off] Jimmy: [does steal some cos that bitch and it's all #bants and we're all fine] Janis: ['fat bitch' in a flat white impression] Jimmy: [dramatic OTT 😱] Jimmy: stop trying to make me 😭 an' all Jimmy: be rude to take the 🏆 Janis: they're pros at 😭 if nothing else Janis: don't be so cocky Jimmy: and I'm not? Jimmy: had the 🎻🎻 out when I came out my mum, ain't stopped since, tah Janis: that's 'cos you're the first child Jimmy: she weren't chuffed about none of us Jimmy: not special, me Janis: still, you get away with more by default Janis: even if it's just 'cos they're green Jimmy: yeah get away with loads Jimmy: be why I'm in community service Janis: amateur Janis: if you turned on the waterworks, might not have happened Jimmy: that's on Bill's 👻 only floating about when I don't need him Jimmy: your fault an' all though, meant to be #inspiring Janis: yeah well, you're welcome Jimmy: when you're not tucking into any grub, might be Janis: now you're calling me fat? Janis: get your own insults Jimmy: calling you territorial if owt 😾 Janis: you got your own, dickhead Jimmy: maybe I like yours better Jimmy: [a LOOK] Janis: [😳] Janis: shut up 🙄😏 Jimmy: [does the whole what charade like he can't hear her even though they are typing] Janis: [🖕] Janis: not getting 'round me that easy Jimmy: it's alright, not scared of hard work, as well you know Janis: yeah yeah Janis: ⌚💕 Jimmy: [throws something at her but like a pillow because he's like be nice to me not fight me] Janis: [😒 'oi!'] Jimmy: ['Oi you' but softer] Janis: [taking said pillow and laying down like I'm exhausted, 'scuse me, which is true but you just can't] Jimmy: [you 100% know he's gonna lay down and spoon her like okay then] Janis: [allowing it 'cos you want it and you're trying not to let a hoe ruin shit for you 'cos ultimately you ruin things for yourself if that ain't a mood and you're just fighting all your instincts to not rn] Jimmy: [just having that moment even though we know it's not comfy for you on the ground because you wanna snuggle her more than you care about yourself] Janis: [and we know neither of you is sleeping but this beats interacting with the flatwhites at least] Jimmy: [you can blatantly hear his heartbeat in between songs gal you know he's not] Janis: [turning to look at him and frowning 'cos he looks as uncomfortable as he is 'you need your massage now' and putting him on his back] Jimmy: [shamelessly so into it when she's doing power moves like that] Janis: [when this keeps your hands and mind busy so you can just get into it and forget about that hoe for a hot sec and try to make him feel better] Jimmy: ['it weren't this bad before' when you've accidentally outted that this isn't the first time this has happened so you're like hope she's focused enough to not question me] Janis: [when he would've tensed when he realized what he'd said so you definitely took notice, as if you weren't anyway, but it does give you indication to not freak out, again, as if you would 'you probably had fractures and injuries, but smaller, repeat injuries in the same place lead to smaller cracks making bigger breaks and giving you longer healing time overall' shrugging like it's that casual 'plus, you're well old now, yeah? muscle and bone don't repair like it used to, granddad'] Jimmy: ['One foot in the grave, me, just waiting for you to get in' because we can always hide behind #bants] Janis: ['no pressure, like' shaking her head like 😏 'worse than a proposal'] Jimmy: ['might be worse than the proposal they pissed on, give you that, Jules' saying that like you're gonna do a better one] Janis: ['be serious, if you distract me I might break another bone and fuck taking the blame for someone else's handiwork and all'] Jimmy: 'Alright, well that there's a seriously good angle for you' mhmm on top of you we know what you're saying and mimes a 📷 like he's taking a pic of her cos that's his handiwork] Janis: [when you're into it and wanna be more into it but 📷 triggers you so you gotta brush him off like oh please 'I'm a professional'] Jimmy: [when you're gonna agree/give her another compliment but you don't have to say anything because a NOISE happens instead because that's how good she is at this] Janis: ['even when you make that very hard' 'cos fuuuck boy 😍] Jimmy: [giving her a LOOK because she's making it very hard for him to even function rn on every level] Janis: ['you deserve it' whispering this when you're inches from his face 'cos massaging his neck and shoulders] Jimmy: ['because?' also whispering and leaning in even more] Janis: ['because...' getting so close that when you talk, your lips touch his and he can feel how hard you're breathing and the heat 'you know exactly what you do to me'] Jimmy: ['because I need you' cos he's not said that yet and we know it's the truest thing and we're all dying because he's as close rn still cos there's never any chill] Janis: [such a noise 'cos not what you were expecting him to say but exactly what you wanted to hear and didn't even know how much that you cannot deal 'if you're lying, I will kill you' Jimmy: ['you'll have to kill me 'cause I'm not' when he's literally saying break my heart bitch idc like he's Peter from all the boys excuse you sir] Janis: ['I won't hurt you' like all the meaning and intention behind that because she hurts everyone else in her life very much on purpose so even to promise to try, bye] Jimmy: [gotta kiss her because we can't even like soz I know we're trying to communicate better but] Janis: [it is needed] Jimmy: [let them have it, they've done loads of meaningful chatting by their standards] Janis: [and the gals should've pissed off to get ready by now] Jimmy: [100% hope they can hear you though because payback is a bitch and so are all y'all] Janis: [same like they better but you two don't need to think about that] Jimmy: [it's okay we know it's not intentional like the fake dating days you're just loud af] Janis: [same like they better but you two don't need to think about that Janis: [Asia gonna have a meltdown lol] Jimmy: [And Mia cos she only just got rid of the band boys and now she has to be reminded yet again that lads exist other than her father] Janis: [so gutted harry isn't here so you can use him, also omg she's like bffs w matty from skins so she should end up going out with him] Jimmy: [she's the only one gutted he's not here] Janis: [mhmm] Jimmy: [also Grace is the only one who is allowed to be like NOPE over hearing anything cos that's her sister the rest of y'all can calm down] Janis: [like you ain't hoeing when it suits lol] Jimmy: [jj are in LOVE bye] Janis: [we already got one hussy tryna ruin it, y'all can stay in your own tent tah] Jimmy: [oh what a fun tent that would be] Janis: [at least this will probably make your giggle 'cos you're 12, welcome for the mood boost] Jimmy: [honestly grow the fuck up gals] Janis: [immediately like shh Asia, so they can get back to Mia's fave topic, JJ] Jimmy: [Grace just wants to LEAVE RN IMMEDIATELY but she can't cos where would go you even go gal #coffeehunting oh Sammi] Janis: [just put some headphones in, it'll piss off Mia but what doesn't, just means they can bitch literally behind your back knowing you can defs still hear] Jimmy: [100% the mood well enjoy looking a state all of y'all cos Grace is good at makeup for all her many other flaws and she's not gonna do none of yours now soz not soz] Janis: [you know the day #2 looks are not gonna be as popping, we've all been taken down a notch/to reality here] Jimmy: [not that any of you were serving on day 1] Janis: [well no but less glitter and feathers today I feel] Jimmy: [we should say the 🌧 is worse too just to really rub salt in] Janis: [it probably would be, and muddy festival is the vibe for everyone else just not y'all] Jimmy: [like you live in Ireland not Ibiza deal with it] Janis: [you should not be surprised at this point like hellur] Jimmy: [what do we wanna do next?] Janis: [well his phone needs to be blowing up on the sly once they're remotely paying attention to anything else again] Jimmy: [yeah they're probably trying to get a snuggly little nap in as well how rude] Janis: [when his phone always blows up low-key and obvs you've always wanted to know but not your place but I feel like he'd act different somehow from when it's just basic DMs or fam so she's like oh but obvs still saying nothing] Jimmy: [I had the most heartbreaking mental image of him smiling or loling at his phone and I'm like WHAT ARE YOU SAYING YOU HUSSY] Janis: [just like brb need something from their tent like you ever do 'cos gotta go] Jimmy: [when that doesn't strike you as weird because you too busy reading whatever bs this gal is all up in your inbox with boy no] Janis: [asking grace to do your makeup so you've got an excuse to be an age] Jimmy: [when she'd be so ???!! because when does that ever happen but she's not gonna say anything like what's wrong in front of the others] Janis: [we sitting there in silence like mia don't start] Jimmy: [she'd be so annoyed so a big part of Grace would be thinking that's why Janis asked because she did promise she'd annoy Mia whoever she can but she's not stupid so she knows its not just that hence her revenge against community service girl later because even if that's not it, it's not helping and that's her sister you hoe] Janis: [just like well you must be having a great chat, Jimothy, don't even care where I am or what I'm doing, great] Jimmy: [that said I am gonna have him hit her up like ? when it's been ages so I'll do that rn] Jimmy: Alright? Janis: 👍 Janis: party never stops Jimmy: you're still next door then? Janis: yep Janis: 💄💅💇 takes time Jimmy: if you get ✨ in my sleeping bag I'm dumping you Jimmy: you would look 🥇 wearing 🌹 in your hair though Jimmy: proper renaissance verona #aesthetic I reckon Jimmy: Bill will be well chuffed Janis: don't think that's the era we're bringing back here Janis: but yeah, give her your notes Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: UGH won't bother asking her to do me next Janis: you're not invited Janis: 💔 Jimmy: bit rude Janis: they are Jimmy: but they can't stop me nipping round to borrow a cup of sugar or whatever bollocks good neighbours are supposed to let you have Janis: oh yeah Janis: dead likely to have sugar Janis: ask about carbs whilst you're getting kicked out Jimmy: hair straighteners then Jimmy: the what don't matter Janis: you won't be able to breathe for hairspray Janis: go enjoy the delightful weather Jimmy: how long are you gonna be? Janis: depends Jimmy: on what? Jimmy: how decent the setting spray is? Janis: no, how much you keep chatting Janis: and why do you know what setting spray is Jimmy: I'll call you then, you can put me on speaker Jimmy: and 'cause I've had a girlfriend before Janis: never hear you over them and their 'music' Jimmy: 🙄 Jimmy: I get it, you're being tortured Jimmy: but I can save you Janis: I won't be that long Janis: no need for heroics or dramatics, boy Jimmy: 😱😱😱 Jimmy: just every need for you to have Bill turning in his ⚰ with that blasphemy, yeah? Janis: he's your imaginary friend more than he is mine 👻💕 Jimmy: so you don't want custody when we break up? 👻💔 Janis: you're alright Jimmy: 👍 Janis: [some time] Janis: you good to go? Jimmy: depends Janis: ? Jimmy: 1. where 2. who with 3. what have they done to you Janis: 1. mainstage 2. who do you think and who did you have in mind 3. dramatic, sure she's put a selfie up by now Jimmy: 1. if I have to 2. you and not them 3. stop saying that like it's a bad thing, dickhead Janis: 1. sure you can convince the alternative act in the 2nd tent is gonna be more fun 2. I'll be there and all 3. soz, it's so wonderful I 💗 it Jimmy: alright Janis: 👌 Janis: [squad rolling out, at least you wouldn't have let Grace go cray with your look so you aren't looking a state, not the mood here ty] Jimmy: [she gonna look good Grace knows what she's doing and Jimothy gonna notice so hard bye] Janis: [ah the awks of treating this like a mission like you need to be up front or something like you suddenly care] Jimmy: [the joys of how much he doesn't know what's going on so he's just being their normal] Janis: [oh boy, meanwhile we getting on it hard, like thanks for the drinks, strangers, we do not care] Jimmy: [like that's registering with him but as per he just thinks she's over the flat whites cos hard same for him always] Janis: [it's a good cover honestly] Jimmy: [and we know he's getting on it too because still got that fam drama and guilt that only gets worse the longer he's away] Janis: [we're just partying, this is casual] Jimmy: [I just imagine Grace like 👀 at them both lowkey trying to work out why the vibe's off cos she don't know yet] Janis: [try and be subtle gal, she will not be happy lol] Jimmy: [contrary to popular belief she can do subtle lol] Janis: [the front was a mistake 'cos obvs community service will be there for the photos] Jimmy: [we see you giving him the eye gal even if he hasn't noticed] Janis: [you're 'working' focus] Jimmy: [literally though and more importantly if you're gonna look then see his blatant 😍 for his bae cos she looks good as hell thank you] Janis: [heading out for a piss, like we all know you aren't finding your way back through a crowd for time/if ever] Jimmy: ? Janis: 🚽 Janis: doing it in a bottle and lobbing it isn't an option for the fairer sex Jimmy: 🎻💔🎻 Janis: real tragedy, yeah Jimmy: would've come with you, that is Janis: told you the trick now, you don't need to Janis: keep 🕺🙌🎉 Jimmy: my turn to get tortured now? Janis: don't seem like it Janis: music ain't up to much but you know Janis: all things considered Jimmy: I'd have rather had the contouring done Jimmy: said as much Janis: 🙄 Janis: you don't need contouring, I need a piss Jimmy: what's your sister's problem? Jimmy: keeps 👀 it's weird Janis: fancies you still, obviously Jimmy: so funny you Janis: who's joking Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: she's been all over that dickhead with the 🍕 and 🎸 til a bit ago Janis: so? Janis: 💔 you ain't her one and only Jimmy: obvs yeah Janis: she ain't fussy Jimmy: makes one of us that does Janis: ha Janis: alright Jimmy: Oi Jimmy: I'm well fussy, me Janis: you picked her so not fussy enough it's gonna get in the way Jimmy: what? Janis: what do you mean what Janis: only so many ways to say that Jimmy: What are you saying it for? Jimmy: that were a game and it were ages ago Janis: alright, ignore it then Janis: joke fit Jimmy: Nah, how about you answer me Janis: I did Janis: joke Jimmy: 👌 Janis: 🤣👮 Jimmy: alright, shut up Jimmy: that don't make it funnier Janis: gutted Jimmy: 💔💔💔 Janis: such a 🥇 taste in humour, you Jimmy: I'm northern, we're #blessed there's owt at all Janis: meant to give you a sense of humour along with the chip on your shoulder Jimmy: is it? Janis: yep Jimmy: go on and @ my dad with what a disappointment I am there Jimmy: been running a tally for ages Janis: write it down yourself and get a routine going Jimmy: to have no dickhead 🤣? you're alright Jimmy: got that already without putting 🖋 to paper Janis: got your fans Janis: taste not necessary Jimmy: Tah Janis: any time Jimmy: 👍 Janis: less typing more dancing, dickhead Jimmy: I don't have any dickhead to dance with Janis: yeah you do Jimmy: nah Janis: there's a crowd Janis: last I checked Janis: 'less everyone's pissed off Jimmy: 🤞🖤 Janis: yeah Janis: that's the spirit Janis: dance like no one's watching, probably got that on a shirt Jimmy: the tall one 100% has Janis: irony lost on them as well as sarcasm Jimmy: real tragedy that Janis: not as tragic as her dancing Jimmy: nowt could be Janis: not seen my sister;s Janis: don't tell her, she'll be devvo Jimmy: 👀 it now Jimmy: hang on, I'll shout her Janis: go ahead Jimmy: better trained than my 🐕 her Jimmy: comes right when you say her name Janis: fuck off Jimmy: what? Janis: not funny Jimmy: is a bit Jimmy: you'd know if you were here Janis: glad I'm missing out Jimmy: I get it, you must've seen her 😭 loads Janis: duh Jimmy: you've been ages Janis: 🚽👮 now too are we Jimmy: would obvs go towards ✔ my #ultimate kink Janis: recommend the portaloos then Janis: sights and smells 10/10 on that score Jimmy: 😍😍 Janis: gotta queue obvs Janis: not the only pervert around Jimmy: just the 🥇 Janis: prove it Jimmy: go on Jimmy: what do you want me to do? Janis: you've got the sick 🧠 Janis: why have I got to think of the task Jimmy: you set the challenge Jimmy: come on, don't be 🙀 Janis: I'm not Jimmy: tell me then Jimmy: ⏲💪🏆 Janis: I dunno Janis: not gonna make you do anything you don't wanna do, am I Jimmy: how do you know I don't wanna? Jimmy: do owt to prove myself, me Jimmy: I ain't scared Janis: well if you do wanna then you can just do it Janis: I cba to facilitate that Jimmy: spoilsport Janis: call me what you want Jimmy: Hey, what's wrong? Jimmy: I'm only pissing about Janis: good for you Janis: I'm fine, bored of this shit Jimmy: we can leave them to it for a bit, when you come back Janis: I'm already back at the tent Jimmy: Alright, hang on Janis: you don't need to Jimmy: Do you not want me to or what? Janis: I'm just going sleep so you may as well stay there Jimmy: that weren't what I asked Janis: stop asking questions Janis: I'm fucked Jimmy: fucked how? Jimmy: that can be the last one Janis: how you think Janis: 🍻🍹🥃 Jimmy: Bollocks Jimmy: you're not Janis: yeah I am Janis: how'd you know Jimmy: we're 🗨 Jimmy: and I've 👀 you pissed before Janis: Autocorrect pretty sound Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: I'll be there in a sec Janis: fine Janis: do what you like Jimmy: Why are you fuming at me? Jimmy: I just wanna check you're alright Janis: yeah, make it sound like an obligation Janis: I said I was going kip, not lying in a pool of my own sick Jimmy: calm down Janis: just stop, alright Jimmy: What, giving a shit about you? Jimmy: No Janis: being so Janis: you know Jimmy: bollocks do I Janis: just stop Jimmy: you Jimmy: stop saying that Jimmy: I haven't done nowt Janis: stop talking Janis: I wanna go to sleep Jimmy: properly talk to me Jimmy: how about that? Janis: No Janis: I've got nothing to say right now Jimmy: why? Jimmy: it don't make sense Janis: if it don't to you that ain't my problem, alright Jimmy: what the fuck does that mean? Janis: that if you're that oblivious then there's nothing I can do about it Jimmy: to what? Janis: now you're just trying to piss me off Jimmy: now you're just being a twat Janis: then leave me alone Jimmy: fuck's sake Janis: if you're so bothered Jimmy: I don't get this Jimmy: you Janis: yeah Jimmy: What kind of answer is that? Jimmy: and you say I'm a headfuck Janis: you expect me to sit and explain myself Jimmy: why not? Janis: 'cos what kind of fucking question is that Jimmy: a valid one Jimmy: what's changed, when the fuck did it? Jimmy: there's some others Janis: I don't want to do this right now Jimmy: me an' all but you come out of their tent and you're a different lass Janis: called a makeover Jimmy: it ain't about what's been put on your face Jimmy: sort your head out Janis: don't fucking tell me to sort my head out Janis: who the fuck are you to Jimmy: Or what? Jimmy: great question though, babe, who the fuck am I? Jimmy: some mug again, do you reckon? Janis: Yeah, or what me too, that'll help Jimmy: Go on, what would? Jimmy: I don't need this bollocks from you Janis: How many times have I told you to leave it and go away Janis: if you don't need it, there's your solution Jimmy: how many times have you said you give a shit? Jimmy: words or no words Jimmy: so we're here for a second go, what's changed? Janis: well you say a lot of shit too Jimmy: is that it? Jimmy: what did I say? Janis: No Janis: you say shit that you then prove you don't actually mean Jimmy: like? Janis: you should know Janis: not make me sit here and fucking spell it out like a twat Jimmy: well I don't Janis: then forget about it Janis: you don't have to say anymore bullshit and I won't believe it Jimmy: if that's what you reckon this is, there's nowt I can say Jimmy: come talk to me when you know what the fuck you want me to try and prove Janis: what I reckon is you say all the shit you say to me but literally moments after we've been together you're more concerned messaging someone else and saying shit to them to notice anything about me Jimmy: ? Jimmy: this is about Becca then Janis: Becca, is it Janis: how would I fucking know Jimmy: you spoke to her this morning, maybe that'd be how Janis: no I fucking didn't Janis: and she's never talked to me either Jimmy: I were there Jimmy: yeah you did and yeah she did Janis: Piss off Jimmy: you Jimmy: all of this is about her? Janis: if you're this stupid, happily Jimmy: it's me being stupid? not a chance, mate Janis: It's incredible you ever get laid if this is how bad you are at taking a hint Jimmy: it's even bloody more so that you still can't get your head round this after we've been over it when you had your two previous strops about her Janis: fuck off Jimmy: yeah I will do Jimmy: 'cause what more can I say or do Janis: Try not being a patronizing cunt in the future Jimmy: what future's that? The one where me and Becca run off into the sunset or? Janis: yeah, keep trying Jimmy: yeah, that's what this is, you putting me on trial for nowt Jimmy: it's such bollocks Janis: it's not Janis: you think and respond how you like Jimmy: fuck responding to any of this Jimmy: Asia's ex boyfriend had a better argument than you're bothered with Janis: yeah well if you want to be as much of a cunt as Asia, do it on your own time Jimmy: nearly there according to you, just swap patronising for owt she can spell Jimmy: thick'll work, you've said that one enough Janis: if it fits, have at it Jimmy: 👍 Janis: hypocrite is a great one and all Janis: two-faced, if you wanna stick with their vernacular Jimmy: 'course I do Jimmy: peas in a pod, us Jimmy: another load of bollocks you've stuck with Janis: show me where you ain't and I'd take it back Jimmy: if you need showing, you're more of a headcase than I gave you earlier credit for Jimmy: and I'll give you another 🏆 for it Janis: you want headcase, you had a fight with Harry, I've not fucking touched her Jimmy: neither have I Jimmy: you gonna pretend you've not touched him? Janis: so as long as there's no touching, it don't count Janis: like it's not a strop when you do it Janis: alright, yeah, go along with those rules, sounds fair Jimmy: it's not a strop when it's your ex Jimmy: she's nowt to me Jimmy: neither's your sister Jimmy: neither's Asia Jimmy: Do you want me to go on or what? Janis: he isn't my ex, actually Janis: and she doesn't intend to stay nothing, just because you've not realized doesn't mean I'll sit here and pretend I ain't so you reckon I'm chill Jimmy: call him what you want Jimmy: and her Janis: whatever Janis: you're a fucking hypocrite Jimmy: you're fucking Janis: you've said enough Janis: I'll read it back and make a list Jimmy: you can crack on with that when you've slept it off Jimmy: won't be about distracting you Janis: yeah I don't plan to stick around either Jimmy: 🥇💡 Janis: 👍 Jimmy: [well that was a fun time but I don't think there's anything else I can say sadly] Janis: [probably not] Jimmy: [we should 1000% say he gets a lift back with community service girl though cos you know that bitch would offer #keen thank god her friends are also there cos I don't trust you gal] Janis: [yeah she's already hitched a ride in this convo like weren't hanging about, the flat whites will be thrilled] Jimmy: [Grace will be losing her mind] Janis: [soz 'cos we know she's not going home] Jimmy: [literally trying to phone her constantly even though you know she won't answer babe and what are you gonna say if she did anyways] Janis: [fun times] Jimmy: [Cali are gonna be thrilled af] Janis: [like she already weren't coming to the house low-key never mind not coming back to town] Jimmy: [and we said this is near the end of the hols so that makes it worse like school be looming] Janis: [basically] Jimmy: [at least the flatwhites don't know that jj didn't leave together because he's not gonna be hanging around waiting for them to wake up and fill them in on his plans, like Grace will know cos she'll see him with that hoe like we said but she's not telling the squad] Janis: [like you'll know if you get to school and she ain't about but 🤞 lads] Jimmy: [yeah depending how long we drag the angst out but for right now you're still #goals and Mia is fuming about it] Janis: [realistically CS isn't waiting any time to make a move so it wouldn't take long to out] Jimmy: [exactly dr phil and we know they highkey too so] Janis: [bit awks when you gotta be like oh u right but that's the path you chose jimothy] Jimmy: [when you're so focused on the bae that you don't see any other girls trying to get their claws in, oh sir] Janis: [what fun, look forward to that]

1 note · View note