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#okay what's the name of their ship i need to know
alexa-fika · 16 hours
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hey I love your writing so much I had an idea but I’m not good at making stories so the other day I remember that when I was little I used to run a lot so I fell from a boat and you know I was swimming away while my parents almost got a heart attack how about a child reader with red haired pirates it would be funny , only if you want you don’t need to do it have a nice day or night
Take off (Red haired pirates x m!child!reader)
A/N Here we go, guys can you believe this is the last of the requests from APRIL like that’s so crazy to me, I want to take you for all of the requests and for trusting me to bring them to life
Reader here is replaced by Dokucha which stands for Readerin Japanese
Dividers by @/saradika
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The Red forced was the same as always, with lively chatter among the crewmates as they partied over their newest conquests, not taking their eyes off the child running along the Deck
“What has got you this happy, Dokucha?” Lucky piped in, taking a bite from his chicken and laughing merrily at the young boy
“Uncle Shanks found a plane in the loot!” He cheered, waiving around said toy around
“Why did they even have toys? The crew didn’t have any children on them,” Limejuice questioned, downing down a mug of beer
“The crew was big on woodwork; they had a couple of pieces here and there littered on the loot,” Shanks answered, joining the group with his own mug in his hand, his first mate not far behind
Dokucha grinned, ignoring their chatter as they launched the toy, beaming as it glided around and rode on the same wind that pulled the Red Force along
“Dokucha, watch where you are going!” Yassop called as the child ran behind the plane, trying to take hold of it
“Don’t w-
His words die out as the floor disappears behind him, and they quite literally run themselves out of the ship. The last thing he heard was the scream of his name as he made an impact with the water, another splash following after his
He gripped onto Beckman’s similarly soaking clothes as he pulled himself over the side of the deck
“Im sorry, Daddy,” he cried, hugging him tighter and sobbing into Beckman’s already drenched shirt as they both sat on the Deck, Hongo crouching in front of the two, checking over the boy, the rest of the crew crowding around the two much to the displeasure of the first mate, a glance to his captain was all the latter needed to quickly dismiss them, leaving only the officers littering the deck
“Everything seems in order; no water seems to have entered the lungs, and no damage from the impact; next time, make sure you pay attention to where you’re running, okay?” He asked, giving Dokucha a small smile as he ruffled his hair and took his leave
Teary eyes glance up at his father, trying to gauge his emotions
He sighed, turning them around on his lap so that they were facing him, as he wiped the tears from the boy, his own dripping hand not making much difference
“I saw the dive you did before you hit the water,” he comments, giving up in the action as he recalls the safety position he had seen them take before colliding with the water
“You told me to do it if I ever fell in the water.”
“You did well; you had good reflexes as well; now we just need to practice keeping our eyes on the path,” he said softly, rubbing his knuckles against his cheeks
“You’re not mad?”
“We’re pirates; we’re going to have our slops from time to time; everyone here has fallen to the water at least once, though not everyone was as gentle as you, ain’t that right, Punch?”
The latter lets cackles as he happily takes over the small boy as he recalls the less-than-proud moments from the crew
“You know, Monster here once fell overboard; you should have seen the little rascal. It was like watching a b….
Beck watches his son regain his previous demeanor at Punch’a stories go on, and he heads to his quarters to replace the now flimsy box of cigarettes lost to the sea
“Shanks,” he called
“Hm?”
“You are banned from giving any Toys to Dokucha.”
“W-What, come on, Beck! We can talk about it,” the captain whined, following after his vice-captain
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Uncle privileges revocked 😂
Taglist:
@imaginarydreams
@amethystviolin
@h0n3y-l3m0n05
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in1-nutshell · 13 hours
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MOON STREACKER AND SWERVE
I need the pinning to go on for way too long.  I’m talking Megatron is now not only on the ship but is sick of the two constantly making heart eyes at each other.  I need there to be a betting pool between almost everyone on the ship when these two are going to get together.  And I need Rodimus not to notice a damn thing.  I'm talking when they get together and are openly in a relationship, rodimus walks in on them making out and almost does a will smith “I’m an adult.  I can handle this.  I’m okay.” Look back to buddy and swerve. “BUDDY NOOOO”
Rodimus is as blind as a bat when it comes to Moony's love life.
Hope you enjoy!
Moonstreaker and Swerve pinning and Rodimus not noticing
SFW, Platonic, Hinted romance, Cybertronain reader
MTMTE
Oh Primus…
Megatron thought that the ship and Rodimus were his punishment.
Apparently, it didn’t end there…
He didn’t know what some of the crew were whining about when he came to Swerve’s for the first time.
Megatron sitting with Ravage.
“I’ve heard something about the bartender Swerve doing something that makes some of the patrons ‘bang their helms into the table’.”--Megatron
Megatron looks at Swerve happily talking to some of the customers at the bar.
“Besides the increasing chattering, I don’t see why—”--Megatron
Ravage points to the bartender again.
“Look again. What do you really see.”--Ravage
Megatron sighs and looks at the bar again.
That’s when he spots Moonstreaker, one of the only other bots that has given him some respect, coming to the bar and sitting down.
Swerve’s optics widen as his smile when Moonstreaker comes and brings her a drink.
Moonstreaker takes the drink and glues her optics on the bartender as he talks away.
She takes few sips from her drink but solely has her attention on Swerve.
“Primus, are they—”--Megatron
“No.”--Ravage
“But the looks—”--Megatron
“Completely blind.”--Ravage
“And Rodimus?”--Megatron
“Completely blind.”--Ravage
Ravage later brings Megatron into one of the spare rooms on the ship.
 Most of the ‘Rod Squad’ was there as well as a large chart in the middle of the room.
There was a chart on the board with multiple bots names, dates, and then some numbers.
This was a room dedicated to the betting pool to when Moonstreaker and Swerve would start going out, to when they would make it official, any potential sparklings…
And then there was a different pool for when Rodimus would find out.
Megatron had stumbled on a secret operation.
… and he was on the chart the next day.
As for Rodimus…
He truly was blind.
The Co-captian doesn’t see any of the of the signs either Moonstreaker or Swerve give each other.
Rodimus is having a drink with Drift at Swerve.
“So, what do you think about Moony and Swerve?”--Drift
Rodimus shrugs.
Drift raises an optic.
“You know…”--Drift
“I know…”--Rodimus
Drift gestures at Moonstreaker and Swerve talking at the bar.
Rodimus looks over and shrugs.
“They’re just having a drink and talk. Nothing new.”--Rodimus
Drift just stares at Rodimus.
“Really?”--Drift
“It’s nothing special, they’ve been friends for a while apparently and this has been happening since we’ve taken off from Cybertron. I thought you would have known Drift.”--Rodimus
Drift starts to question the observation techniques of his friend as he downs the rest of his drink.
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coeluvr · 3 days
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So I just read the demo for the first time and… are you okay? Like do you need to talk to someone? Cuz holy shit, that was depressing. Don’t get me wrong, it was great, but I am just mentally, emotionally, and physically drained now (don’t ask me about that last part). All in all, I really enjoyed it, but I do have some thoughts.
Firstly, I don’t understand how anyone from Rosea (except for Hunter, Fadiya and her mom, and maybe Helios) has any fans. Like did they just forget that everyone else (including Lancelot) contributed to the total destruction of our family? Everyone’s over here shipping Lancelot and Luceris, and to be fair, if this was a different story I would too, but like… they’re the enemy? Speaking of Luceris…
Dude is on some shit. Like I get it’s the point, but everything about our relationship with him just feels weird and wrong, and I’m counting the days til we can kill him. Until then, I guess I’ll have to make do with disrespecting the memory of his dead wife at every opportunity. Also side note, but as a Straight Male tm it does feel a little weird having to fake a romance with another guy, especially a guy that’s like fifty years older than me lol (Luceris really isn’t beating the Catholic Priest allegations)
The rest of the cast are a lot of fun, and I’m glad they all at least have sympathy towards MC. I think Hunter is the coolest character ever and I want to be them, and Fadiya can do no wrong in my eyes. Vincent sucks, but I haven’t really spent much time with him so maybe that’ll change. Helios I feel sorry for. He’s a nice guy and I do like him a lot, but he’s unfortunately collateral damage in my crusade against Father Luceris. I hate that we have to hurt him to get revenge, but it feels very realistic and gives your decisions a lot more weight.
On the flip side, Soarine is perfect and has never done anything wrong in her life ever. If Soarine has a million fans, then I am one of them. If Soarine has ten fans, then I am one of them. If Soarine has only one fan then that is me. If Soarine has no fans, then that means I am no longer on earth. If the world is against Soarine, then I am against the world.
All in all, I love what you’re doing with this game, even if I do have to take a twenty minute break after each playthrough just to decompress lol. I can’t wait to see where this goes and am gonna stare at a wall until the next update drops. Thanks for making such an interesting story and give Soarine my love 💚
Lol hi, anon!
First of all, I'm fine 😭 I'm like that one happy guy that writes horror whose name I keep forgetting but I bet someone knows who I mean.
Regarding the characters from Rosea that are not all that great having fans, I don't know why that's unexpected to you if I am being honest lmao. In every fandom I've ever been in, there have always been people that like the antagonists. I am one of the people that ship Lancelot and Luceris but I feel like that's to be expected since I literally created them. 💀 The day I write in all of the side couples you'll combust. /j
But also you don't have to fake a "romance" with Luceris? 😥💀 I can only think of the husband comments MC can make and those are entirely optional so...
I'm glad you like the other characters! Soarine is indeed everything. 🙇‍♀️
Thank you for your kind words! 💗
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julisworking · 2 years
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trobeds · 1 year
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i know the hunger games isnt about romance i know it isnt a love story but. theres just something so beautiful in the way peeta is the personification of what it means to heal and he /is/ the dandelion and the bread and the hope that things can be better even if they wont be fixed. even if the nightmares dont stop he will still hold her. wake her up and tell her shes alive. shes safe. and when its over and done and theres no more saving or protecting or trying their absolute hardest to die if it means keeping the other alive, the horrors dont stop. but katniss will still find that comfort in peetas arms.
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crescent--rose · 2 months
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is it normal to stare at a girls neck and then blush when she catches you looking and be very dejected when she leaves? no. thats gay
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beanghostprincess · 4 months
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if you like ling and greed the most… have you perhaps considered… shipping greedling? 👀
Bold of you to assume I don't ship whatever the fuck Greed x Ling x Ed have going on at the same time
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emerynnn · 2 years
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This game has me on chokehold, Chelsea has me on my knees and Chief/Chelsea will be the end of me.
So have some fanart I drew of them from last week.
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One piece of Blitz / Mox smut, coming up hot!
Media: Helluva Boss
Pairing: Blitzø / Moxxie
Rating: E for Explicit
Word count: 10.2k (what. the. fuck.)
Warnings: None apply
Additional tags: Safeword (and use of it), panic attack, semi-public flirting, anal fingering / sex, Daddy kink, light Dom / sub vibes, polyamorous stuff, slight spoilers for s2 ep3? i think, emotions be a thing even for Blitzø, gentle & loving & caring Blitzø
Where else to read: AO3 (username: TheWeirdDane ; title: Would You Spare Me A Glance Tonight?)
Author's note: I started and finished this in like 2-3 days ? First fic for Helluva Boss but wanted to join in on the fun <3 Blitz is like a drug to me
ANYWAY. FIC TIME.
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It wasn’t often that Moxxie and Millie were in agreement about who they invited into their bedroom. There had been imps that had Millie starstruck, but left Moxxie with a dirty taste in his mouth. Vice versa, there had been demons that got Moxxie unusually hot and bothered, but where Millie drew a hard, proverbial line in the proverbial sand. 
There was, however, at least one imp down here in Hell that they both fancied, albeit in different ways. For Moxxie, it was specifically the desire to fuck their boss. He was insufferable, and he was obnoxious, and worst of all, he was fucking hot.
Every day at work, Moxxie had to pretend he didn’t find Blitzø infuriatingly hot. He couldn’t quite put a finger on it; Blitzø was nosy as hell and invaded everyone’s privacy, didn’t seem to care about other creatures than himself, and he always made unnecessary and vulgar comments on everything and everyone.
Truly, he should find the imp insufferable, full stop. Nothing more. But, truth be told, the insufferableness got Moxxie very hot and bothered. The confident strides, the arrogance, the self-assuredness, the way nothing seemed able to dampen Blitzø’s spirits. 
It was truly the worst crush he could possibly have. 
Luckily, he could vent his frustrations to Millie, and Millie could reassure him. She understood him like no one else did, and he was eternally grateful to have such an understanding, lovely, loyal wife. Something he made sure to tell her every chance he got, loving how it made her giggle.
-------------------------------------------------------
After a particularly difficult client, Blitzø took them out for drinks to celebrate a job well done. He had booked a private table at a new dive, and arrived well before the rest of the crew. Sitting with his drink, his head snapped up when he heard the doors open and his co-workers’ voices drift through the bar. Quite an accomplishment, considering the kind of music that played over the speakers. 
“Finally you lazy fucks are here!” he exclaimed, waving an arm to get their attention, as if his voice wasn't perfectly fine for that. “And Loony, sweetie, you look practically hellish!” 
“Shut up, dad!” she hissed and looked around, almost as if she wanted to see if anyone had heard him. Everyone in the dive had, of course, with Blitzø being obnoxiously loud, but no one was stupid enough to mock or make fun of a hellhound. 
“What took you sickos so long? Would’ve thought you couldn’t come fast enough, Moxxie,” he grinned and scooted over in the booth to make room for Loona, Moxxie, and Millie. 
“We’re perfectly on time, sir, you are just early,” Moxxie said dryly, perfectly ignoring the other half of his boss’ quip. He was sat next to Blitzø, which filled him with both dread and excitement. With Millie on his other side, Loona sat down on Blitzø’s right side, practically caging the two against each other. 
Sitting this close together - they were practically rubbing elbows! - Moxxie was painfully aware of how good Blitzø smelled. If he had been less self-conscious, he might’ve asked what cologne he was using. As it were, however, he settled for breathing quietly, but deeply, through his nose, aiming to embed the smell in his brain forever. 
“What do you guys want?” Blitzø asked. 
“What do they have?”
Moxxie looked for a drink card, but didn’t see any. Blitzø shrugged. 
“No idea, but I’m sure even you could find something here.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“I don’t know, you just seem very picky.”
“Which is kinda funny,” Loona chimed in. 
Moxxie took a deep breath. He had a feeling his patience would be severely tested tonight. 
“Pray tell, Loona, why is it kind of funny?”
“You know. Because you’re fat.” 
“I am not fat!” he exclaimed, drawing the attention of a few of the other patrons and making Blitzø laugh loudly. Moxxie’s cheeks got warm. “I am not fat!” he hissed, quieter, and pointed at Loona, who once more had her snout in her phone. 
She was smirking, and it was annoying enough that Moxxie gestured for Millie to move so he could get his first drink. 
‘First drink of many, if this is any indicator of how tonight’s going to go,’ he thought to himself with a soft sigh. 
Millie went with him to the bar where they eyed the many bottles of various hard liquors. 
“How fast do you think that one could knock me out?” he asked and pointed towards one with a bright green liquid, irritation clear in his voice. Despite having talked to Millie, it was the male bartender who answered.
“One shot, and you’d be out cold, little fella,” he supplied helpfully. 
“Excellent. I’ll take three.”
“Moxxie, sweetie,” Millie said softly, taking one of his hands in hers. “Don’t let them get to you. And do not pour those shots!”
The bartender, who was a rather handsome bull-like demon, stopped dead in his tracks, in the process of reaching for the bottle. He looked surprised to hear a female imp talk so firmly. 
“We’ll take two of those instead.”
She pointed towards a bottle with a transparent liquid, and the bartender hastily grabbed it, poured two shots, and set the glasses down in front of them. 
“Thanks.”
They took their glasses and weaved their way through the crowd. It was getting increasingly full in here. 
“Finally!” Blitzø exclaimed as they sat down in the booth again. “What’d you get?” 
He grabbed one of the glasses and lifted it to his nose to sniff it. His face contorted. 
“Ugh! What in Satan’s asscrack is that?”
Truthfully, Moxxie didn’t know, and thus looked to Millie, who appeared confused. 
“Y’all don’t know this?”
When none of them answered, she pushed some hair behind her horn, smiling bashfully. 
“It’s from the Wrath ring!”
“Oh, so it’s some local whackjob hill-billy’s backyard hootch, isn’t it?” 
“Yeah!” she said, beaming at Blitzø. Moxxie felt less and less desire to drink it with every passing second. But, they had paid for it, and he didn’t like wasting things, so it was with a defeated sigh that he lifted his glass. 
“Cheers...?”
“Cheers, you fuckos, to a job well done! Loony, quick, take a pic!”
Loona rolled her eyes but nonetheless leaned into Blitzø, who grabbed Millie and Moxxie so they could all squeeze together in the photo. 
Moxxie had to admit that, being this close to Blitzø, his heartbeat accelerated, and he involuntarily sniffed his boss’ coat. Discreetly, of course. Or maybe only Millie noticed because Blitzø was busy pestering and gushing over Loona, and he hadn’t been discreet at all. She simply sent him a knowing grin that made him blush. Seeking out her tail with his own, they entwined, and he smiled into his glass before downing its contents. 
He immediately regretted it. 
The taste of alcohol was so strong and prominent that his eyes watered and his throat burned. Blitzø smacked his lips after taking a sip of his own drink, and laughed at Moxxie’s misery and gagging. 
“No reason for those choking sounds, Mox. Not yet, anyway.” 
“With all due respect, sir,” Moxxie croaked with a hand on his throat, “shut the fuck up.” 
Blitzø grinned while Millie sympathetically stroked Moxxie’s back. 
“Oh, so you like being bratty, huh? Well, not to worry, I’ll be shutting you up real good later tonight,” he promised, avoiding Moxxie’s glare by instead fawning over Loona, who snarled at him, her ears laid back. 
“With the amount of snooping you do, Blitz, I would’ve thought that you---”
“That I what, Mills? Can’t hear you over this epic fucking song they’re playing! Come on, somebody, dance with me!”
Blitzø had one foot on their table, the other on the seat, and he looked around at them excitedly. No one moved a muscle. 
“Oh, come on,” he groaned, rolling his eyes. “Are you chucklefucks too scared to dance?”
“I don’t dance,” Millie said with a shrug. Blitzø looked towards Loona. 
“I’m not gonna be seen dancing with you,” Loona scoffed. Blitzø looked towards Moxxie, now waggling his eyebrows. 
“No. Definitely not, sir. I am not dancing with you! You’re my boss!”
“Oh, grow a pair, Mox, it’s not like we’re gonna fuck on the middle of the dance floor! Unless that’s what you’re into, of course, in which case I guess I could be persuaded.”
Moxxie groaned and slapped a hand over his face. 
“Why are you always so vulgar? Does this kind of talk seriously get you anything?”
“Like you wouldn’t believe. So, now, come on, Mox, or you’ll miss your chance!”
“Happy to, sir.”
Blitzø scoffed and leapt off the table. His long tail flicked from side to side before grabbing his half-full glass of beer. 
“See you, suckers!” he shouted and squeezed himself through the crowd to get to the dance floor. 
Moxxie sighed and leaned back against the booth, pinching the bridge of his nose. 
“Why is he always on my case? Why doesn’t he bother you guys as much as he bothers me?” he complained. 
Loona shrugged. 
“He bothers me all the time,” she said. “Doesn’t mean he means it, you know.”
���Excuse me?”
“What, didn’t you hear me? Too much fat in your ears?”
“What?!”
Loona’s lips twitched into something that was nearly a grin. 
“Just because he bothers you doesn’t mean he doesn’t like you.”
“But why would he bother me if he doesn’t mean it?”
“Fuck’s sake, I don’t know! Take that up with him in couples therapy or some shit!”
“Couples therapy...? Oh, come on!” he groaned, his cheeks heating up. 
She sent him a glance, then looked at her phone again, before her head snapped up, and she looked at him again. He recoiled slightly. 
“Oh shit, Mox, are you blushing?”
“What? No, of course not!” he lied, suddenly wishing he had more alcohol to hide his face in. 
“You totally are!” And then, much to his horror, and before he could stop her, Loona shouted, from the top of her lungs. 
“Hey Blitz!”
Liquid ice ran through Moxxie’s veins, and he looked at Millie who had a giant, shit-eating grin on her face. 
“Don’t let him take me dancing,” he pleaded, but Millie simply snickered. 
“I know you want to, honey, it’s okay. Oh, here he comes!”
Blitzø pushed through the crowd, his now empty beer glass cradled in his hands. He looked drunk for a guy who’s only had one beer, leading his employees to think he might have had a few shots while he was away. 
“What’s up, Loony, everything okay?” he asked, slurring slightly. 
She rolled her eyes and gestured to Moxxie. 
“I think fatty-chatty has something he wants to say.”
Moxxie didn’t know what he wanted to comment on first; her insult, or her insolence. 
“I do not!” he then exclaimed instead of doing either of those. 
“Then what the fuck was the fucking point of hauling me back here? I was having fun!” 
“Sorry, sir,” Moxxie said, looking to the side. He was very acutely aware that he was still blushing, curse his body! He was also aware of how Blitzø stared intensely at him. Oh crumbs, he was going to notice, wasn’t he?
“Wait... fuck, Mox, are you blushing?” Blitzø laughed, and Moxxie wanted to bury himself. “You guys humiliated Moxxie without inviting me? Shame on you all!” 
Moxxie groaned and put his head on the table. 
“Just leave me to die,” he mumbled. 
“No fucking way. Come on, loser, we’re going dancing!” 
There was a sudden, sharp yank on his arm, and he knew it was Blitzø. Untangling his tail from Millie’s, he sighed in defeat. 
“If I dance with you, sir, will you leave me alone?” 
“Absolutely not, it’ll just make me want to humiliate you more!” 
Well, at least he was honest. 
Moxxie let himself be dragged out of the booth and stumbled after a way too eager Blitzø. Reaching the dance floor to the last notes of the current song, the crowd clapped and cheered, eager for the next one. Moxxie, on the other hand, felt that death’s swift embrace would be the kindest option right now. 
A feeling that only increased when the first note of the next song reached his ears. It was slow. Waiting a few beats to see if it sped up, he was mortified when he realised that no, it would stay calm and slow all the way through. It was a song to slow dance to. 
Blitzø looked surprised as well, albeit only for a second before it was gone from his face, and then there was only mischievous glee in his eyes. 
“Well well well,” he practically purred, and Moxxie once more cursed his useless body for blushing, just as Blitzø pulled him closer by his hand. 
“Just relax and enjoy it, Mox.”
That was most definitely an innuendo. Moxxie groaned and looked away, but obediently put one hand on Blitzø’s shoulder, the other remaining in Blitzø’s grasp. His tail swished from side to side, as if agitated. He tensed when Blitzø grabbed his waist with surprising tenderness, and oddly enough did relax as they started swaying together. 
“You’re not used to leading, are you?” Blitzø chuckled. 
“Does it matter what I say? You’ll still treat me like chickenshit.”
“Mox, I’m appalled you’d think that of me.”
Moxxie glared at him. 
“No, you’re right, I totally would. I’m just saying, you fell into the woman’s role quite naturally.”
Moxxie rolled his eyes. 
“Yeah well, take it or leave it.”
“Oh, I’m happy to lead. Who knows where this will take us,” Blitzø murmured, making Moxxie blush something fierce. 
For all his energy and constant hyperness, Blitzø was surprisingly good at slow dancing. He swayed slowly and gently with Moxxie, who, with each passing second, felt more and more at ease with the entire situation. He was hyper-aware that he was dancing with his boss, and that he wanted said boss to pull him closer, but at the same time, it was like Blitzø knew how vulnerable he was in this situation, which meant that Moxxie let down his guard. Just a bit. 
Roughly halfway through the song - Moxxie would never tell a soul that this song was actually one of his favourites - however, Blitzø did something that almost made him black out. His boss did pull him closer, close enough that Moxxie could lean his cheek against his chest, and then he slid his hand lower. From Moxxie’s waist to his hip, not only pulling him in, but keeping him there. 
“Sir, what are you---” He knew very well what Blitzø was doing, but it apparently wasn’t registering in his brain. 
“You know my name, Mox. Use it.” His voice was soft, but firm. 
Moxxie swallowed hard. In his mind, there was a clear, strong disconnect between calling Blitzø anything but ‘sir’. It simply did not compute. Probably due to his upbringing - something he didn’t wish to think about now, or ever - it took him a few seconds to process the command. 
“Blitz,” he then said, so softly that it made Blitzø look down at him, his eyes wide and pupils dilated in the dark. 
It was like they were both caught in the headlights of a truck. They had stopped moving. Only their rapid breathing proved that they were still alive. Blitzø’s hand tightened its grip on Moxxie’s hip, prompting him to let out a soft, quiet moan that he immediately regretted. 
Oddly enough, Blitzø didn’t mock him. On the contrary, he looked... conflicted?
No, that was impossible. Blitzø had the emotional range of a fork; there was no way he was conflicted. If he wanted to do something, he did it. If he wanted to say something, he said it. But then... why did he look down at Moxxie’s lips before looking him in the eyes again? And why did his hand suddenly slacken its grip of Moxxie’s hip? 
“Sir--- Blitz, please don’t let go,” he whispered before knowing what came over him. Blitzø blinked down at him, biting his lower lip. 
“If I don’t, I’ll end up kissing you.”
His voice was so soft, so torn, that it made Moxxie’s mind reel. He looked up at Blitzø with wide eyes. He knew he had permission from Millie, but actually making a move still felt like crossing an immense boundary. Like he was stepping into territory he would never return unscathed from.
He swallowed hard. 
It was now or never, before Blitzø reached a decision that contradicted Moxxie’s own desires.
It was with an aggressively beating heart that he took Blitzø’s hand in his own, before placing it back on his waist, maintaining eye contact. 
“There,” he said with a soft smile. “Isn’t that much better?”
The breath audibly hitched in Blitzø’s throat. 
“I’m not kidding, Mox,” he whispered, sounding winded, as if he’d run a marathon. As he spoke, he slowly slid his other hand from Moxxie’s hand and to his cheek, cupping his face. Moxxie felt like his heart was going to burst at the seams. 
“Don’t make me do this...”
“With all due respect, I’m not making you do anything,” he murmured, just before Blitzø kissed him. His heart beat so hard it was making him queasy, and to forget about that, he instead focused on Blitzø’s lips as they passed over his own. 
He let go of the hand on his waist to instead take a gentle hold of Blitzø’s wrist. At first, Blitzø tensed, but when Moxxie pressed into the kiss, into him, he relaxed again. 
“Don’t worry,” he mumbled against his lips, “Millie and I have an agreement. You’re not trespassing or crossing a boundary. It’s okay.” 
Blitzø groaned into his mouth, and suddenly, the kiss became deep and demanding, pulling all air from Moxxie’s lungs. His hand gripped Blitzø’s wrist tighter, and he let out a quiet moan, his eyes closing. 
Someone bumped into them, grunting something about ‘get a room’, resulting in Moxxie losing his balance and clinging to Blitzø, who stumbled forward but managed to keep upright. 
“Get the fuck outta here if you can’t handle two guys kissing, you fucking prude!” Blitzø shouted after whoever had bumped into them. Moxxie couldn’t help but burst into loud laughter, the adrenaline and excitement of the whole situation making him practically delirious. Blitzø sent him a look like he had completely lost his marbles, before he, too, began laughing. 
He pulled Moxxie into a standing position. 
“Should we... head back?” Moxxie eventually asked when Blitzø seemed glued to the spot. The question seemed to pull him out of whatever trance he had been in. 
“Your place or mine?” he grinned, flashing his many sharp teeth. Moxxie’s cheeks were burning by the time he finally stammered that he meant that they should get back to the booth. “No need to be shy now, Mox.”
As they slowly weaved their way back, Blitzø’s tail flicked from side to side, almost as if anxious. Moxxie glanced from his long tail and to his face. The second it took for Blitzø to realise he was being observed, he looked thoughtful - conflicted - but then he blew Moxxie a kiss, and Moxxie nearly tripped over himself. 
Reaching the booth, they found Millie sitting by herself, with no sign of Loona. 
“Where’s my baby?” Blitzø asked immediately, looking around the nearby booths. 
“She got a text from Vortex about a party,” Millie replied and downed another shot that smelled suspiciously like the whackjob hill-billy’s backyard hootch they had earlier. “Said something about us being lame and boring.” 
Blitzø proceeded to have a minor breakdown, while Moxxie made eye contact with Millie, and couldn’t stop a wide grin from splitting his face in half. His heart, though having slowed down, still beat fast in his chest. He was trembling slightly from the excitement. 
“Relax, Blitz,” Millie said, patting the space next to her. “She’ll be in safe hands... paws... whatever, with Vortex.”
“Will Verosika be there?” 
“Hell if I know. She didn’t mention her,” Millie shrugged. 
Blitzø sighed deeply, making puppy eyes at the exit, but eventually let himself be persuaded to sit down next to Millie, while Moxxie crawled up on his other side. 
“How was the dance?” Millie asked with a smug smile, the question directed at Blitzø who did seem to liven up at that, if only for a second before he glanced between Millie and Moxxie. He seemed to struggle with his reply, something highly uncharacteristic. 
“Your husband’s a shitty dancer,” he eventually settled on with a snicker. “I had to lead him through the entire fucking thing! I thought you had taught him better, Mills. Anyway, what’re you having?” 
“I was thinking of getting a beer. Y’know, something light. Do you guys want anything?” 
“Beer sounds awesome,” Blitzø hummed. 
“I’ll have a beer as well. Thank you, honey.” Moxxie reached over to kiss his wife before she left the booth. Neither of them missed how intensely Blitzø observed them, completely shamelessly. Like this was a regular occurrence, which it was, truth be told. Blitzø had no concept of privacy or personal space, and often watched them through the windows of their apartment. A few times, they had even caught him videotaping them getting it on. 
Sometimes, Moxxie wondered if it was because he was painfully lonely. It seemed to him like Millie, Loona, and himself was the only company that Blitzø ever had. Aside from the royal Goetia, of course, but Blitzø never really talked about him, unless they needed Stolas’ grimoire to access the living world, in which case, Blitzø would be gone for the night. It was obvious, even to Moxxie, that they were only allowed to use the powers of the grimoire because of the sex Blitzø and Stolas had.
A transactional fucking, as Blitzø liked to call it. 
“You look really stupid when you’re deep in thought, you know that?”
Moxxie rolled his eyes. 
“Thank you, sir. I’ll try not to think in the future.”
“Shouldn’t be too hard for you,” Blitzø purred and ran a claw down his spine. Moxxie immediately straightened with a sharp intake of air, then glared at Blitzø while trying to ignore the way heat coiled in his lower stomach. 
“What? Don’t act like you didn’t like that.” 
Moxxie sighed. Much to his annoyance, he was right. But, that also gave him an idea, just to fuck with Blitzø. Metaphorically, of course. 
He leaned in close to the bigger imp, sitting up slightly on the seat so it was easier to murmur into his ear. 
“I really did like it. Do you think you could do it again, sir?”
Gambling on addressing Blitzø by his more formal title really paid off. He stared out in front of him, as if transfixed by something in the distance, but he breathed in so sharply that Moxxie could hear it. 
“What in the fuck?” he then asked, sounding a tad out of breath and turning his head to look at Moxxie, who shrugged and sat back down on his seat, pretending he hadn’t said anything out of the ordinary. 
Blitzø puffed out his chest, leaning in close against Moxxie, who knew he was about to get attacked. Where was Millie when he needed her?! How long could it take to get three beers?!
He breathed heavily already before Blitzø said anything, but when he did, his words were accompanied by a claw slowly sliding down the length of his spine again. 
“Don’t worry, Mox, I’ll make that little head of yours blissfully empty.”
Moxxie tried to remain calm, but couldn’t ignore the way his cock throbbed, or the way his heart skipped a beat. He knew he was blushing hard, but he had a feeling he hadn’t really stopped blushing since the first time tonight. 
With half-hooded eyes, he turned his head to look at his boss. He even bit his lower lip in that way that female imps and demons always did. It looked so ridiculously seductive when they did it, so he really hoped it had the same effect on Blitzø. 
“How would you do that, Blitz?” he asked quietly, tuning his voice to a lower pitch. 
Blitzø had clearly not expected Moxxie to play along, and scooted a bit backwards, away from his employee. Moxxie followed him, letting his tail wrap around his boss’ ankle. 
“I didn’t take you for the kind of guy to leave someone hanging,” he purred, and although his voice trembled, this didn’t deter him. It also didn’t seem to matter to Blitzø. “So, come on, won’t you tell me all about how good you’d make me feel?”
“Mox,” Blitzø croaked. He tried to push further back when Moxxie advanced on him, but misjudged the distance between his hand and the booth, and ended up on his back on the seat. Moxxie saw his chance and seized it. 
Slithering onto his boss to straddle him, he realised how hard Blitzø was when he sat down on him. 
It made a shudder ripple through him, and he let out a soft moan. 
“Mox, you’re married! To someone way out of your league, granted, but you can’t just---”
“And I already told you it’s fine. Thank you for the insult, by the way. Very nice,” Moxxie said dryly, leaning down on Blitzø and caging him in by placing his hands on either side of his head. He glanced out at the bar, realising that they were not being shy or quiet, and that other hell creatures could easily see and hear them. 
For once, this didn’t deter him. 
He must be more eager than he thought. That, or the one shot he had had was just that strong. 
That had to be it. There was no way in Hell that Blitzø got him so worked up. That would be ridiculous!
But when he looked down at his boss’ wide eyes and slightly open mouth, he knew it wasn’t just the alcohol talking. There really was something about Blitzø that got him going. He couldn’t put his finger on it, and at the moment, he also couldn’t care less. 
“What do you mean, it’s fine?” Blitzø asked. 
Moxxie rolled his eyes for the umpteenth time that night. 
“It means that Millie and I have an agreement, okay? That’s all you need to know for the time being. Now, shut up,” Moxxie said, rather gruffly, and crashed their mouths together. Blitzø made a surprised sound in his throat, but when Moxxie didn’t relent, he seemed to melt into it. 
One of his hands came up to rest on the back of Moxxie’s head, the other taking a firm hold of his waist. A full-body shudder wrecked through Blitzø, making his cock bob, and Moxxie, who usually wasn’t very smug, smirked. 
“Do you like that, sir?” he purred. 
“Shut the fuck up,” Blitzø groaned, pulling Moxxie firmer against his body to deepen the kiss. Moxxie let out a pleased sigh and slid his hands over his boss’ massive horns. Reaching the base of them, he rubbed the skin slowly, and Blitzø moaned. An honest-to-Satan moan of pure bliss. 
“So that’s your good spot,” Moxxie murmured against his lips, his own twitching into a wide grin. 
“I’ll kill you if you spill about it,” Blitzø said, trying to sound threatening but only managing an ounce of menace in his voice. 
“Wouldn’t dream of it,” Moxxie promised and pushed his tongue into Blitzø’s mouth. Blitzø went rigid before a shudder made him sag back against the seat, and he pushed his own tongue against Moxxie’s with a needy sound.
Moxxie’s mind was reeling. How many times hadn’t he fantasised about this? Maybe not this exact scenario, but the general gist of it; having Blitzø beneath him, kissing him, making him feel good? He sure couldn’t count it on one hand, and probably not on two, either. 
He couldn’t help a moan of his own, and felt Blitzø’s lips tug into a smug smile. 
“Feels good, doesn’t it, Mox?” he purred, sliding one hand up to his horns and grabbing one of them firmly to yank his head back. Moxxie yelped, trying to look indignantly down at his boss, but his body betrayed him by shuddering. “But I’ll do you one better,” Blitzø continued, and suddenly sat up, his free hand steadying Moxxie on his lap, before sinking his teeth into his neck. 
Now, Moxxie was no stranger to the rougher genres of sex. He was familiar with certain aspects of it, and knew what he liked. Unfortunately, he hadn’t counted on Blitzø to know as well. However, when Blitzø bit his neck, Moxxie went rigid, and his hands fisted on his boss’ back, bundling in his coat. 
“Blitz!” he gasped, and upon hearing his name said in such a shrill tone, Blitzø growled low in his throat and pushed Moxxie on his back, covering him with his own much bigger body. Moxxie craned his neck, a sharp whimper rising into his throat and spilling out between his gritted teeth. Being granted better access to the expanse of unmarked skin, Blitzø groaned shakily, and sucked on the flesh. He tugged sharply on Moxxie’s horn again, and Moxxie moaned loudly, prompting him to slap his hands over his mouth, looking mortified. 
Blitzø released his throat and grinned down at him. 
“How’s that for making you feel good, bitch?” 
Moxxie made a sound of immense embarrassment, covering his face with his hands. Blitzø laughed and, in a moment of true vulnerability, stroked Moxxie’s cheek so tenderly it was almost like a lover’s gentle caress. 
“It’s okay, Mox,” he whispered. A beat of silence. Then... “What exactly is this agreement you have with Millie? How far can we go?”
“As far as we want.”
Blitzø narrowed his eyes. 
“That’s awfully fucking vague. Anything that’s off limits?”
Moxxie removed his hands from his face to instead stroke Blitzø’s shoulders. 
“Remember who you’re talking to. I’m sure you’re way more experienced and wild in bed than I am. I don’t... know what my limits are.”
“I don’t know, Mox,” Blitzø said, grinning, “you were the one who made the first move, and you were the one to pin me down in a booth in a public bar. Should I have you arrested for public indecency?” 
Moxxie laughed softly. 
“With all due respect, sir, we’re in Hell. Public indecency is an access card.” 
Blitzø shrugged. 
“How about the arresting part, then?” he purred, wiggling his eyebrows and making Moxxie’s skin erupt in goosebumps. “Interesting. Should’ve known you’re secretly a fucking freak! It’s always the quiet ones.”
Moxxie groaned and rolled his eyes, but couldn’t help but smile up at Blitzø. 
“Wanna get outta here?” Blitzø then asked, gesturing towards the exit with his head. The way the light caught in his beautifully curved horns had Moxxie speechless for a second. 
“S-Sure,” he mumbled.
They untangled themselves from each other, and Blitzø was gentlemanly enough to help Moxxie to his feet. 
“What about Mills?” 
Moxxie looked around; he couldn’t see her anywhere. Pulling out his phone, he saw a text from her. It said:
Have a good time, honey! I hope you’ll tell me all about it tomorrow ;)
He held his phone up to Blitzø with a trembling hand. 
“Good enough for me. Let’s go.”
They managed to get home without being too handsy with each other and draw the attention of others, but the second the front door was slammed shut, Blitzø crowded Moxxie against the wall. 
“Now’s the time to back out if you’ve changed your mind,” he growled and bent forward to suck on the faint mark he had already made. His hands were on Moxxie’s hips, pinning him to the wall. 
“In your nightmares,” Moxxie moaned, squirming slightly in Blitzø’s grasp and reaching up to grab the back of his shoulders. 
They were still in their clothes, and Moxxie was desperate to get out of them. He was painfully hard and aching for any kind of touch. 
“Safeword?”
“Strawberry,” Moxxie whispered without even having to think about it. He and Millie didn’t use safewords, but ever since fantasising about Blitzø, and especially since being given permission to have sex with him, he had become aware that a safeword was probably a good idea. So, he had come up with this one - strawberry. Simple! 
Blitzø snickered. “Strawberry, really?”
Moxxie rolled his eyes. 
“It’s not something I’d normally scream during sex, which is the point of a safeword! Now, do you want to fuck me or not?”
Blitzø’s eyebrows shot up on his face. Moxxie once more wanted to bury himself. 
“So you are a fucking bottom.”
“Excuse you, I contain multitudes!” 
Blitzø laughed, but it was oddly... fond, and cupped Moxxie’s cheek. 
“Sure you do. Between being pegged and wanting me to fuck you, I’m sure you have it in you to be on top. Somewhere deep inside. Very deep.”
“You’re really not speaking very well for your case.”
“You know I’m right. Anything I can’t call you?” 
“Let’s take that as it comes. I can’t... can’t think straight,” Moxxie admitted, breathing shakily as Blitzø slid his hand from his cheek and down over his chest, skirting over his stomach before ending by his cock, stroking the sizable tent in his pants. 
Blitzø leaned against him, purring into his ear. 
“You’re bigger than I imagined.”
“You’ve imagined my cock, sir?”
“Of course. Everyone imagines everyone naked and what they’re like in the sack!”
“I... I really don’t think that is---”
“Whatever, it doesn’t matter. What matters is that you strip for me, right now,” Blitzø rumbled, his voice leaving no room for arguments. Moxxie shuddered, and began undressing. Blitzø pulled back, lounging on the nearby couch so he had a proper view of Moxxie. His tail flicked slowly from side to side, his pupils blown wide and taking in every one of Moxxie’s moves. 
Moxxie didn’t waste time or energy trying to be sexy. He knew he would fail spectacularly at that, anyway, and just focused on getting out of his clothes as quickly as possible. 
“What’s the rush, baby? We have all night. Not that I don’t appreciate how eager you are, of course,” Blitzø grinned, and had to suppress a shudder when Moxxie walked towards him in all his naked glory. He looked self-conscious; rubbing his right arm with his left hand, the tip of his tail pointing downward and swishing anxiously, his gaze darting around the room and very clearly trying not to look at Blitzø. 
“Looking good, Moxxie,” he purred, trying to soothe his nerves. “Come sit on Daddy’s lap, and I’ll make you feel so good.”
Moxxie flushed deeply, but sheer surprise made him lower his hands. 
“Did you... did you just call yourself Daddy?”
Blitzø grinned and spread his legs to make room for Moxxie. 
“Don’t pretend you’re not a fan, I saw how it made your cock twitch.” 
Moxxie made a sound of deep shame but nonetheless moved to sit between Blitzø’s legs. Nestling his back against his boss’ chest, he was immediately enveloped in his scent and arms. He inhaled deeply, closed his eyes, and exhaled just as deeply, leaning his head back against Blitzø’s shoulder. 
“I’ve just... I’ve never played with that aspect of sex,” he mumbled. 
“No surprise there.”
“What is that supposed to mean?” Moxxie huffed, a shiver rippling through him when Blitzø slowly stroked down his arms. 
“You don’t exactly scream ‘daddy’ vibes, Mox.”
“Oh, and you do?” 
Blitzø snickered, sliding his claws over Moxxie’s sides. 
“Face it, Mox, I’m just a whole other league than you.”
Moxxie rolled his eyes, but couldn’t help but press himself harder against Blitzø’s chest when he dragged his claws across his inner thighs. 
“W-Who of us has a wife, huh?”
Blitzø’s claws dug into his thighs, and Moxxie yelped. Squirming in his grasp only made the claws sinker deeper into his skin. He breathed shakily, closing his eyes tightly. That felt... so fucking good. 
“And who is going to let his boss fuck him because he just can’t resist him, hmm?” 
Moxxie moaned. Blitzø’s hands were so close to his cock, yet they seemed so far away, and it was driving him insane. He writhed again, making Blitzø snicker. 
“What’s the matter, baby? Do you want Daddy to touch you?” 
“Don’t call yourself that,” he croaked, his skin heating up and erupting in goosebumps. He hated the way his cock bobbed, making it painfully clear that he was into it. 
“Are you gonna be disobedient? Gonna be bratty, hmm?” Blitzø grinned, but there was something in his voice that threw Moxxie off for a second. There was want in his voice, a wanton need, like he wanted Moxxie to be bratty and disobedient. 
“Is that what you want?” he asked, needing to know if he was correct. Blitzø was suddenly quiet; something that Moxxie took to mean he was correct. 
“Well, then you can go fuck yourself,” he then said, making a move as if he was going to leave. Blitzø immediately grabbed his thighs tightly with his long claws, pulling him back against his chest and growling into his ear. 
“Don’t fucking move unless I tell you to,” he snarled, and Moxxie hated how eagerly his cock bobbed at the rough treatment. Yet, despite his body’s reactions, his mind reared. This was not right. It felt wrong. It felt bad. Something inside him lurched. Memories of his father flashed in front of his eyes; his father calling him a disobedient little bitch, his father ordering him to do things that felt wrong, his father hurting him, his father making him hurt... others.
He felt sick. 
This needed to stop, right now, or he might actually suffer a panic attack. 
“Do you unders---”
“Strawberry,” Moxxie croaked, abruptly, staring down at the couch with eyes that suddenly stung. 
To his credit, Blitzø’s voice was immediately soft when he spoke, and he gently wrapped his arms around Moxxie. 
“Okay. It’s okay, Mox. It’s me.”
Moxxie grabbed Blitzø’s arms tightly, breathing hard. He hadn’t realised how tense he had gotten, but now that he was aware, he began trembling as his muscles tried to relax. 
“It’s alright, Mox. I’ve got you. It’s just the two of us. We’re alone. Just the two of us.”
“I-I’m sorry, sir,” Moxxie began, but Blitzø gently, yet firmly stopped him. 
“No, none of that, Moxxie. No apologising, and no ‘sir’-ing me. You know my name, and at this point, you can use it. We’re there. We’ve reached that point.”
Moxxie nodded slightly, lifting his hand to wipe his eyes. 
“Do you need tissues?”
He shook his head vehemently, and the very thought that Blitzø might leave - even if just to grab the nearby tissues - made him cling to his boss’ arms again. 
“Okay. It’s okay, Mox, I’m not going to leave,” Blitzø reassured him, squeezing him against his chest. 
Moxxie took a deep breath and let it out slowly. 
“That’s it,” Blitzø praised softly and kissed one of Moxxie’s horns. 
Moxxie tensed in his arms.
“What did you--- did you just...” He trailed off. 
Blitzø shrugged, chuckling softly.
“I had saved that for when I wanted to drive you mad with desire to have me rail you, but it seems that you need the comfort more right now.” 
A beat in silence.
“And maybe we don’t mention that part to Mills,” he then said, sounding sheepish. Moxxie smiled weakly.
“Sorry, sir--- Blitz. Millie and I share everything.”
“Disgusting,” Blitzø laughed, pressing his face in the tight space between Moxxie’s horns to nuzzle his white, fluffy hair. 
They sat like that, quiet, for a little while. When Moxxie finally breathed easy again, Blitzø tentatively released him from the tight grip, and seeing as Moxxie didn’t panic again, he fully let go of him. 
Gingerly turning Moxxie around, Blitzø’s eyes crinkled at the corners as he smiled, stroking one of Moxxie’s horns before cupping his face with both hands. 
“What do you need?” 
Moxxie lifted his hands, but seemed hesitant for a few seconds, before he gently grabbed Blitzø’s wrists. 
“Can you... can you kiss me?” he mumbled, averting his eyes. He felt like a fucking idiot, but he could unpack that later. 
“Look at me, please?” The sheer gentleness in Blitzø’s voice drew his gaze, and then Blitzø smiled a bit wider. “That’s it. Thank you. Keep your eyes on me, okay? Don’t close them.” He kept his voice soft and kind as he stroked Moxxie’s cheeks with his claws. 
Moxxie nodded, and Blitzø closed the distance between them to kiss him. A soft sound escaped him, but he kept his word, and kept looking at Blitzø, who also maintained eye contact. 
“That’s it,” he praised, making Moxxie shudder. Well, if tonight wasn’t full of emotional whiplashes... “Relax, I got you.” 
Moxxie whimpered quietly and pressed himself into Blitzø, who slid his hands down around his body, grabbing his hips and pulling him against him. Moxxie let himself be pulled, but also moved his own arms around Blitzø’s neck, desperate for physical contact. 
“Look at you, doing so well for me,” Blitzø continued softly against his lips, pulling all air from Moxxie’s lungs. His cock, which had gone flaccid in his panic attack, was starting to bob again. Heat once more swirled and coiled in his lower stomach, spreading through his entire body to make his claws tingle and his skin erupt in goosebumps. 
“Now, can you do something for me, Mox?” 
Moxxie nodded, and only pulled back because he was in dire need of air. He felt woozy and lightheaded. 
“What is it?” he asked, his voice rough and quiet. He cleared his throat, Blitzø smiling. 
“I just want you against my chest again. I want to take good care of you.” 
Moxxie shuddered at the implication, then moved into the desired position, nuzzling himself firmly back against his boss’ chest. It felt good. It felt safe. 
“That’s good,” Blitzø murmured, rubbing Moxxie’s shoulders and upper arms soothingly before moving down over his abdomen. Moxxie automatically sucked in his stomach. If he noticed, Blitzø didn’t comment on it. Upon reaching his thighs, he gently stroked the claw marks he had left earlier. 
“Sorry about these,” he mumbled, and Moxxie couldn’t help but smile. 
“It’s fine, Blitz. It felt good. Well, right up until... you know.”
He felt Blitzø nod behind him as he leaned in over him, caging in Moxxie in his arms. His claws dragged over Moxxie’s thighs, making him shudder, before he took Moxxie’s cock in his hand and began stroking him. 
Moxxie inhaled sharply, pushing back against Blitzø. There was something deeply arousing about having Blitzø practically loom over him as he stroked his cock; something he wasn’t sure he could articulate properly. But, Hell, why would he need to articulate it, anyway? Why shouldn’t he just lean back and let himself enjoy this? 
That’s exactly what he did. He relaxed in his boss’ grasp with a shuddering sigh, leaning his head back against Blitzø’s broader body. 
“That’s it, Mox, just relax, let me take care of you.”
Blitzø was starting to get worked up again, having also gone limp when Moxxie had panicked. Moxxie could now feel his cock against his lower back, and judging from the throbbing, he wasn’t small. He swallowed heavily, wondering if he would be able to take it all. There was a sizable size difference between him and Blitzø, after all. Not just in height, but also in cock, it would seem. 
“Blitz,” he whispered, not really knowing if he wanted to say more, and in that case, what he wanted to say. Maybe he just wanted to let his name roll off his tongue like that. It did feel really good. 
“I’m here,” Blitzø said, in the same hushed tone, continuing to stroke him until he was fully hard. “Look at you, responding so well,” he continued, and... was that a slight tremor to his voice? Moxxie wasn’t sure, and didn’t comment on it, knowing that Blitzø most likely wouldn’t appreciate that. 
“Does it feel good?”
“Yes, Blitz,” he immediately moaned, arching his back slightly against Blitzø’s sturdy chest. “It feels... it feels really good. Your hand has a firm grip, but it’s not too tight, and---”
“Okay, Mox, there’s no need to hyper analyse the situation. Just focus on how it makes you feel.” 
Moxxie blushed, bobbing his head in a nod. 
“Sorry.”
He closed his eyes. Blitzø gradually sped up, pumping him harder, and with time, Moxxie began bucking his hips, pushing his cock into Blitzø’s hand. At this point, his breathing was hard but shallow, and his eyes closed tightly. He was focusing so intensely on the pleasure coursing through him that he was only vaguely aware of Blitzø’s free hand on one of his horns. His claws scratched over the sharp angles before grabbing it, then pulled his head back firmly, but still with enough gentleness that Moxxie could pull free if he wanted to.
Which he didn’t. 
No, he moaned deeply, a full-body shudder wrecking him. 
“It’s okay, I got you,” Blitzø positively growled, and oh dear, he was getting really worked up, wasn’t he? His hips were beginning to buck slightly, and it was clear to Moxxie that he was really trying to stop them from doing it. Something about this made him moan again, but this time, it was a sharp, choked off sound, like he was being strangled. 
Fuck it. No pain, no gain, right? Besides, it wasn’t like he hadn’t been fucked before. Millie was a big fan of pegging him, and truth be told, so was he. This was slightly different, though; it was his boss, and he wouldn’t be penetrated by a strap-on with a toy, but an actual cock. 
He swallowed hard. 
“Blitz,” he moaned, squirming slightly but without moving much; Blitzø’s grip was simply too tight. “Blitz, can I ask you something?”
“Anything,” Blitzø replied, but it sounded forced, like he was speaking through gritted teeth. 
“Will you fuck me? Please?” 
Blitzø went rigid as he inhaled sharply. 
“You sure? I don’t... I mean, I’m not gentle.”
“I’m counting on it,” Moxxie whispered, relishing the way Blitzø now shuddered. 
“Then fucking Hell yes, I will.”
Moxxie laughed softly. 
They unwrapped from each other and went to the bedroom where Moxxie crawled onto the bed, Blitzø right on his heels. 
“Aren’t you... going to undress? You’re still in your suit...”
“Nah,” Blitzø simply replied, and pushed Moxxie onto his back to kiss him hard. Moxxie whimpered, but arched himself into his boss while eagerly returning the kiss. 
“Let me at least see what you’re about to shove in me,” Moxxie whined, and Blitzø snickered against his lips. 
“So forward, Mox! But since you asked nicely...”
He pulled back and unzipped his pants, freeing his cock. 
On one hand, Moxxie wished he had never asked to see it. On the other hand, he almost salivated at the sight. Definitely above average in length and girth, the underside of the shaft was littered with small barbs that looked like they would hurt. The head of his cock was also framed by spikes, not unlike the spikes on his head and back, only way, way smaller - thankfully. 
“Can I...?” he asked, reaching out a hand and looking up at Blitzø. 
“Be my guest.”
He tentatively touched the barbs, and Blitzø let out a shaky sigh, leaning his head slightly back. 
They weren’t too rigid, but actually felt slightly malleable. Spurred on by Blitzø’s grunt as he ran his hand around the shaft, Moxxie enclosed his cock in his hand and began stroking. 
“Moxxie...” Blitzø growled, a warning lilt to his voice. 
“Just testing, sir--- I mean, Blitz.”
“You know what? Changed my mind,” Blitzø said with a wide grin and pushed Moxxie on his back again, pinning his hands beside his head and relishing the way he shuddered. “Call me ‘sir’. Is that... okay?” 
He crashed their mouths together in a fierce kiss that stole all the air from Moxxie’s lungs. He kicked his legs slightly, squirming, but Blitzø was stronger and effortlessly held Moxxie down; something that Moxxie hadn’t known he was into. But now that Blitzø did it, he saw stars, and moaned shakily. 
“Yes, sir,” he whispered in-between kisses. 
“Good. On your hands and knees, now,” Blitzø growled and pulled back again. Moxxie wasted approximately zero seconds, immediately turning over and pushing himself onto his hands and knees for Blitzø. He was trembling all over, and his cock dripped pre-cum onto the covers. Embarrassing. 
“Where do you keep lube?” 
“Bedside table,” Moxxie whispered and pointed towards the top drawer of the bedside table with his tail. 
“Within reach. Of course.” Blitzø leaned in over him - Moxxie tried very hard to suppress a shiver - and opened the drawer with slightly more force than necessary, nearly tearing it out. He found the purple bottle of lube and resumed his position behind Moxxie. The cap was popped open, and a few seconds later, Blitzø lifted Moxxie’s tail before touching his wet, sticky fingers to his hole. 
Moxxie moaned and shoved his face into the pillows. It wasn’t like he didn’t like being prepared, but whenever he got pegged, he was always so excruciatingly horny that he wanted to be stuffed sooner rather than later. Thus, he made more sounds than he normally would, and he couldn’t help himself; he pushed back against Blitzø’s fingers as they circled his hole. 
“Oh, someone is eager,” Blitzø teased, stroking his hand down Moxxie’s spine. “You ready?”
“Please, sir.”
Blitzø let out a shaky growl and pushed one finger inside him. Both of the imps felt immense pleasure surge through them, but whereas Moxxie gasped loudly, Blitzø was more controlled, and simply worked his finger deeper, until he was knuckle deep. Now he was strangely quiet, however, knowing that if he said anything, the tremor in his voice would be evident. And he couldn’t afford to jeopardise his reputation as a hard-ass. 
He began thrusting his finger, applying another generous dollop of lube, and Moxxie shivered hard, squeezing the pillows tighter with his claws. His tail flicked from side to side, pleasure coiling in his belly and dripping from his cock. 
“Please, sir,” Moxxie repeated, nothing more than a shaky croak, and bucked back against him. “Fuck me, please, I can take it.”
“I don’t doubt that, Mox, but I’m not about to break you. Mills would tear out my spine through my mouth if I hurt you.”
Moxxie laughed breathlessly. Yeah. Yeah, she would. 
“So, I’m going to prepare you properly so you can take my cock without being a little bitch about it, okay?” 
A shudder went through the smaller imp before he relaxed, and Blitzø grinned down at the back of his head. 
“There you go. That’s a good boy.” 
Moxxie wasn’t prepared for being called a good boy, but it made something warm and sticky slosh through his veins. A gasp escaped him, and he inadvertently clenched around Blitzø’s finger. 
“So that gets you, huh?” Blitzø teased, his voice strained, and pushed another finger in beside the first. He groaned at the warm tightness, leaning in over Moxxie and supporting himself on his other hand. 
“Is that okay? Calling you a good boy?” 
“Yes,” Moxxie rasped with a tight voice. “Fuck yes, it... it really gets me good, sir.” 
“Good. Just checking in.”
With that out of the way, Blitzø began thrusting both fingers firmly. Pulling them almost all the way out before sinking them deep inside him again, he set a steady rhythm, working on opening a gasping and moaning Moxxie. When he started sounding a bit too relaxed, however, Blitzø added a third finger, just to keep him on his toes. 
“Fuck,” he croaked, making Blitzø grin widely. His forked tongue passed over his lips and tickled Moxxie’s cheek. “Sir, please, I’m ready.” 
“Ready for what?” 
“Come on, you know what!”
“Of course I do. I just want to humiliate you by hearing you say it.”
“You’re a real jerk, you know that?”
“Aww, thank you for noticing! Now, tell me what I want to hear, or you won’t get what you want.”
“Classy. Trying to pretend you don’t want it just as much as I do.”
“Eh.”
Moxxie rolled his eyes, shoving his face into the pillows again. He needed a moment to prepare himself, something Blitzø seemed to notice. 
“It’s okay. You don’t have to if---”
“Stop patronising me, sir, and start fucking me instead.” 
Blitzø shuddered, a wide grin draping itself over his face. 
“Now that’s more like it.”
He withdrew his fingers from his ass, and Moxxie let out a soft moan. There were a few seconds where nothing really happened - aside from Blitzø lubing up his cock - and Moxxie’s mind began rearing again. It had been a long time since he had taken an actual cock, and back then, it hadn’t been as big as Blitzø’s. Not to mention that Blitzø’s cock had fucking barbs! What kind of cock had barbs?! 
Just as he started mentally backpedalling, he felt the blunt, barbed head of Blitzø’s cock press against his tight ring of muscle, and the warm slickness instantly melted away his worries. 
This was going to feel amazing.
They moaned in unison as Blitzø pushed forward, penetrating him with slight difficulty. 
“Christ on a fucking stick, how are you still so tight?” he grunted, putting a hand on Moxxie’s hip while the other remained on the pillow next to his head. His claws dug into the soft fabric. 
“With all due respect, sir, you’re just very big,” Moxxie croaked, tripping over the words and doing his best to relax, thus allowing Blitzø deeper inside him. He breathed deeply, and Blitzø groaned loudly as he sank further in. 
Moxxie felt the barbs around the head of him scrape over his flesh, and went rigid. It didn’t... okay, it did hurt, but it wasn’t the sharp kind of unpleasant pain he had expected. Rather, it was a kind of pleasant pain he hadn’t experienced before, and he didn’t know how to explain it. All he knew was that it made his cock throb fiercely. 
“Fucking hell,” he whispered, pressing his forehead against the pillow. 
“Couldn’t agree more,” Blitzø growled, and began sliding deeper into Moxxie. He was almost being considerate, pushing forward at a slow pace, until Moxxie’s ass clenched around him. Then, all bets were off, and he slammed as deep inside him as he could, savouring Moxxie’s choked off gasp while he himself stifled a moan by biting his lower lip. 
“Fuck!” Moxxie cried out, trembling like a leaf. Blitzø finally straightened, grabbing both of Moxxie’s hips, and began moving. He pulled so far back that only his barbed head was inside him, and then pushed deep inside with a hard thrust, jerking Moxxie’s smaller body slightly over the covers. Moxxie groaned with each move, but despite the pain of the barbs - or maybe because of it? - he was enjoying himself immensely. 
As the seconds passed by, Blitzø’s thrusts got firm before turning hard, eventually becoming rough, and through it all, Moxxie thought he was going to black out from the onslaught of sensations. Not only was he being stretched almost painfully, but the barbs scraped over his flesh, enhancing the entire experience. The more eager Blitzø got, the harder the spikes became, until they almost hooked themselves into his inner walls. Only then did he grit his teeth, a faint wish that he hadn’t agreed to this flaring in his chest. It was snuffed out just as fast as it had appeared, though, when Blitzø reached around to stroke his cock. 
The touch made Moxxie gasp sharply. 
“Oh, you got so tight there, Mox,” Blitzø growled, pumping him leisurely. “It’s like you don’t even want me to pull out of your ass.”
Moxxie blushed hard, his hole fluttering around Blitzø’s cock. 
“Who would’ve thought that a little bitch like you---”
“Hey!”
“--- would take my cock so fucking well?” he continued with a grin, completely ignoring Moxxie’s exclamation in favour of fucking him harder. He was panting slightly, timing his thrusts with his strokes of Moxxie’s cock. 
With each pump of his cock, Moxxie gasped, and he knew he wouldn’t be able to last much longer. Considering the many emotions he had been subjected to tonight, it was a miracle he was still holding it together. 
“Sir, I’m close,” he rasped, mortified by the fact that he was eagerly pushing back against Blitzø, but delighted that each move got a choked off moan out of his boss. 
“Then how about we up the ante?” It was a shaky growl, a shaky question that didn’t need an answer. Moxxie already had an idea what Blitzø was going to do. 
He was both right, and terribly wrong. 
Blitzø did squeeze his cock tighter, and he did pump him faster, but he also bit down into Moxxie’s shoulder, hard. This particular action sent Moxxie over the edge, and he came with a sharp cry, spilling into Blitzø’s hand and onto the covers. 
“That’s it, baby, come for me,” Blitzø growled, thrusting ruthlessly into him, desperately seeking his own release. Moxxie’s ass pulsated rhythmically around Blitzø as his orgasm overtook him, prompting him to groan and slam into him even harder. “Fuck, Mox, your ass is so desperate for my cock...”
Why was he being so vulgar, and why was it so hot?! 
Moxxie groaned shakily. 
“Where can I come?” Blitzø then asked, his voice a hard, tight line. Moxxie blinked slowly, feeling all kinds of warm and fuzzy and tingly. 
“Anywhere you want, sir,” he practically purred, and apparently, this was exactly the thing Blitzø needed to hear, because next thing Moxxie knew, he felt his cock throb and jerk repeatedly, and he knew he was coming inside him. 
Knowing this made him inhale sharply while Blitzø let out a string of curses, his claws digging harshly into Moxxie’s hips, pulling him back against him. 
On one hand, Moxxie wished Blitzø’s orgasm would have lasted longer - a part of him really wanted him to be full of his boss’ cum, apparently - but on the other hand, he knew that was unrealistic. 
“Fuck,” Blitzø eventually whispered when his orgasm had died out, and pulled out of Moxxie surprisingly gently. Moxxie still winced, especially when the barbs - once more soft and malleable - dragged over his sensitive flesh. 
“Yeah,” he agreed shakily, allowing himself to slump against the bed while steering clear of the pool of cum right below him. 
Blitzø joined him. That is to say, he laid down on his back next to Moxxie, stretching languidly, but remained within touching distance. Moxxie took full advantage of this, and rolled on his side to curl up against Blitzø. 
They were both quiet for a little while, both imps’ brains working in highest gear. 
“I’m really not trespassing, right?” Blitzø asked, sounding oddly... genuine. Moxxie couldn’t help but smile, and scooted closer. Tentatively, he put his head on Blitzø’s chest. While Moxxie was a huge fan of post-coital cuddling, he had a feeling that Blitzø wasn’t.
That begged the question; why did he allow it?
“You’re not. Millie and I have an agreement, as I believe I have told you a hundred times already.” 
Blitzø snorted. 
“Alright, Moxxie, there’s no need to get snarky, or I will have to shut you up.”
Moxxie grinned, feeling all sorts giddy inside. Elated, was probably the right word.  
“Gags and bondage gear are in a box in the closet, if you really feel like it,” he said as casually as he could, and by Satan, it was worth it, just to hear Blitzø choke on a sharp intake of air. 
Then his boss laughed, and it was warm and free and genuine. 
“And here I thought you two were all about ‘tender lovemaking’ and boring missionary with the lights off.”
“Yeah well, you learn something new every day.” 
They fell into a comfortable silence where Blitzø put a hand on Moxxie’s horns, stroking them gently. 
“We’ll talk about this tomorrow, okay? With Millie present,” Moxxie suggested. “We need to talk about what this means for all three of us.”
Blitzø hummed noncommittally. 
“Blitz.”
“I guess,” he then said, and Moxxie didn’t need to look at him to see that he was rolling his eyes. But at the same time, there was a smile in his voice, reassuring Moxxie that this hadn’t been a total disaster of an idea. 
“Good. Now that you have promised to stay, we should probably change the bed sheets.” Moxxie was about to get up when Blitzø pulled on his horn, forcing him to stay against his chest. 
“That’s your responsibility. You come, you change, as the old saying goes.”
“That’s not a saying in any way, shape, or form.”
“Well, I’m making it one.” 
Another few minutes of silence stretched out between them, and Moxxie was dozing off when Blitzø talked again. 
“So... do you freaks really have a box of gags and bondage gear in the closet?”
“No,” Moxxie yawned.
“Oh...” Blitzø sounded almost disappointed, and Moxxie smiled smugly. 
“It’s under the bed.”
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My parents and I watched the season 3 finale of Star Wars: Rebels tonight and I can't believe my mom was the one who was like "WHY ARE THEY* ALL DYING?!" and I was the one being all, "don't worry I'm sure it will be fine." this is the most role reversal we have ever done.
(*to clarify I mean the rebels in general, the main cast was fine)
#star wars#star wars rebels#star wars rebels spoilers#what's really funny is that this season ended pretty much like 'the last jedi' did it with hardly anyone making it out#and them all crowded on the main iconic ship#and I HATED the last jedi#but like it just felt so much more HOPEFUL in rebels Idk man#also yeah I did make this post as a way to shamelessly react post in the tags#Idk even where to start#the first part of the finale was crazy man their leader literally CUT AN IMPERIAL SHIP IN HALF by ramming his command ship into it#like if you're gonna die doing a kamikaze run let it be by CUTTING ANOTHER SHIP IN HALF#and what the FUDGE is bendu WHAT was his deal even#kanan showing up yelling at him like merry with treebeard in the LOTR movies#'but you're a part of this world! aren't you?'#my mom was so mad at bendu for refusing to help akjghljasgdhfdgjags I'm over there like 'wait until they ACTUALLY ATTACK HIS PLANET'#and haha I was right#okay this is so silly but I'm so happy they didn't kill off agent callus that dude has really grown on me#he was doing his best thrawn's just insane with strategy#also THRAWN aklghfjaskgdls okay I LOVED his reaction to bendu being “?!?!? shoot it?!?!” *windows error noise*#man was foiled by his own underlings and angry force rafiki#HERA CALLING KANAN 'MY LOVE' OH MY WORD JUST *MARRY* EACH OTHER ALREADY YOU BASICALLY ALREADY ARE#'looks like the family's back together' STOP#the yavin base name drop#me through the entire space battle: do you know what we need right now? the battlestar galactica#just looked it up and apparently a star destroyer is actually not much bigger than a battlestar which is. FASCINATING to me#they'd be like the same class of ship#which tracks yeah#anyway#they did have a few ships get away so they did actually have a better success rate than in TLJ#but of course they had MANDALORIANS to help them out here so
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mihrsuri · 1 year
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I made a poll about which WIP to work on and I am delighted by how many people want to read the Plantagenet OT4 - aka Eleanor of Aquitaine/Henry II/Thomas Beckett/Rosamund Clifford are married and it’s literally ‘FUCK YOU’ ‘Fuck me yourself you COWARD’ except for Rosamund where everyone is like ‘not you Rosamund you’re an angel and we’re thrilled you’re here’ because she holds the braincells and the chill.
(I love Eleanor so much and she’s so smart and great but she has never been chill in her entire life)
(It’s actually a very happy marriage it’s just Dramatic Fuckers Inc)
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mommalosthermind · 2 years
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Sometimes you sit in an unexpectedly free moment with the intent to work on your WIP, but 3k of porn happens instead. Oops.
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hopeheartfilia · 2 years
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remembering what its like to read merlin fanfics : opened a fic, five translations, there is cover art
#this is kind of normal i juat missed it a lot#thats what happens when my friend mentions morgana means mermaid and i go#doesnt it mean sea circle? and then we check and like sometimes its#taken as dweller of the see but it suposespy comes from sea and circle/light#but can also be from the seashore sometimes so i get why someone would go to mermaid#but also not that im typing this out i feel like i need to look more into it and also#go read la morte darthur#which no. stop.#which is why im opening the bbc merlin fanfic#also its been. a time. and ive been getting into#okay you know what. i do have adhd i can admit it was a hyperfixation.#ive lost count of how many times ive reread these books but its probably over a hunder and absolutely over 50#so i had a pretty bad hyperfixation on harry potter when i was eight. it calms me down to read harry potter fandiction#i didnt do when my original obsession with it happened and afterwards ive found that i avoid reading the later books and also the books#as a whole especially after jk rowling.. just kept going in that direction you know#but like in the period of time where i got so bored of reading mlb fanfiction that i watched voltron#just becausr i knew there was a lot of fic with it.... i realised that i har this nearly endless fountain of fic#so i got obsessed with marauders era fanfiction#because my two otps for that fandom are wolfstar and linny witch i dislike as a ship name a bit so ginny/luna#most other ships i go with okay whatever i dont care#i have found ships i like but it largely depends on the fic#ive never really been into drarry which is bold of me to say as someones whos red thta much drarry fics but i like#slytherin harry fics if they have nuance and you know. so many good hp fics are drarry. if you dont mind ejther way youre gonna see ita lot#i do mind fics that ship him with severus. i mind it a lot. which is where the robuts ao3 tagging systems comes in play#anyway point is ive been getting back into harry potter fanfiction which is a quick process because frankly i knwo my shit#but i dont really want to like. give it attention online. so i mostly quietly read my fics and die about#theodore nott from other peoples choices. on my own time.#.... searched for adhd harry potter. i adored the fic but i wont be reading anything else from this authour due to fandom differences#and there was nothing in the bookmarks except for this cool ron almost runs over dudley with a car#then dudley moves into grimauld place which hates him and hes going to culinary school with draco malfoy.
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outofcontextfossil · 6 months
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i have to make a presentation to teach my latin teacher something by the end of december and i have been thinking about what i will teach her since this summer. every single one of my ideas has been something im into like an insane amount and love a lot so i dont know if i would be able to compose myself and actually present and not dry heave when it comes time to actually
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maraczeks · 8 months
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bcs s6 thread pt 6
#sept 21 2023#it's so freakin g full circle too the way he ends up in nebraska omaha beach where she came frim like#jerry from parks?😭#it is literally so terrible for me out here like first brad whitfield but only as josh lyman and then it got worse w will mcavoy but kind of#as a joke but not really but now this like this is the worst bc it's so recent so it's literally jimmy now ohhhh my god i can't help it that#still can't get over it ?????? the things they've gone through and then she LEFT?#like she had to but no nooooooboonobono the way they built them up like they are so forever#but it's okay i have so much bob rhea content and then so many fics <3#also it's so interesting that they chose to do the post brba scenes in b&w when that's usually signifying the past#the close up on heels i immediately assumed it was kim girl get a grip#i've never had a non endgame ship real breakup like i can't cope this is the greatest love story there's no way it ended#and they legally still married tho oh my godddddddddd ohh i have no wife i just whimpered so loud#wait i'm i don't think i can finish tn and i'm going to cv tmw oh no#i just wanna watch mcwexler edits and bob and rhea interviewssss#i think in a week i'll watch that scene again but i'm also just like. worm in my brain wants to watch the whole show again it was so insane#creasing over how excited jimmy is that kim asked about him as if he wasn't the great and only love of her life😭😭😭😭😭 im so miserable rn#yeah this is my first actual real non endgame tragic ship and they were so perfect OH MY GOD HES CALLING HER#AND KNOWS HER NIMBER !??????? WNDHHFBFNNSNDNBFBFJDNFJDJFHJ M SHAKINGGGGGGGGGG IH JDNFNDN#i cant believe he went to nebraska i cant believe he called her i can't believe she kept her name dude dudeeee what is going on i need to kn#staring into the distance dot gif simply cannot comprehend a workd where jimmy and kim are not attached at the hip#no okay there's the b&w gif of kim on the phone and them sharing a cigarette?#still using viktor😭😭 i'm so in shambles clinging and grasping it's slipping away#two episodes left we power through#oh now what the frick i burst into tears im sobbing#the divorce paperwork hit me out of nowhere i literally can't stop crying#crying so hard like ud think my parents died or smth i literally cannot#KIM#THAT UGLY BROWN IG PLEASD AINT NO Whhyy she's living with another man NOPE THIS ID NOT#AINT NO WAY BROTHER DHE SOULD NOG#THE SONF?babdbbdvfbdbdndjxbdbfnsndncncj u hate everything KIM NO OFNDBBABYYYSYDYDHFHFJSJCI CNANDJDJSNDJDJDJDJ EVERHTHINF HURTS AND I SCEAM N
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inkskinned · 10 months
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at some point it's just like. do they even fucking like the thing they're asking AI to make? "oh we'll just use AI for all the scripts" "we'll just use AI for art" "no worries AI can write this book" "oh, AI could easily design this"
like... it's so clear they've never stood in the middle of an art museum and felt like crying, looking at a piece that somehow cuts into your marrow even though the artist and you are separated by space and time. they've never looked at a poem - once, twice, three times - just because the words feel like a fired gun, something too-close, clanging behind your eyes. they've never gotten to the end of the movie and had to arrive, blinking, back into their body, laughing a little because they were holding their breath without realizing.
"oh AI can mimic style" "AI can mimic emotion" "AI can mimic you and your job is almost gone, kid."
... how do i explain to you - you can make AI that does a perfect job of imitating me. you could disseminate it through the entire world and make so much money, using my works and my ideas and my everything.
and i'd still keep writing.
i don't know there's a word for it. in high school, we become aware that the way we feel about our artform is a cliche - it's like breathing. over and over, artists all feel the same thing. "i write because i need to" and "my music is how i speak" and "i make art because it's either that or i stop existing." it is such a common experience, the violence and immediacy we mean behind it is like breathing to me - comes out like a useless understatement. it's a cliche because we all feel it, not because the experience isn't actually persistent. so many of us have this ... fluttering urgency behind our ribs.
i'm not doing it for the money. for a star on the ground in some city i've never visited. i am doing it because when i was seven i started taking notebooks with me on walks. i am doing it because in second grade i wrote a poem and stood up in front of my whole class to read it out while i shook with nerves. i am doing it because i spent high school scribbling all my feelings down. i am doing it for the 16 year old me and the 18 year old me and the today-me, how we can never put the pen down. you can take me down to a subatomic layer, eviscerate me - and never find the source of it; it is of me. when i was 19 i named this blog inkskinned because i was dramatic and lonely and it felt like the only thing that was actually permanently-true about me was that this is what is inside of me, that the words come up over everything, coat everything, bloom their little twilight arias into every nook and corner and alley
"we're gonna replace you". that is okay. you think that i am writing to fill a space. that someone said JOB OPENING: Writer Needed, and i wrote to answer. you think one raindrop replaces another, and i think they're both just falling. you think art has a place, that is simply arrives on walls when it is needed, that is only ever on demand, perfect, easily requested. you see "audience spending" and "marketability" and "multi-line merch opportunity"
and i see a kid drowning. i am writing to make her a boat. i am writing because what used to be a river raft has long become a fully-rigged ship. i am writing because you can fucking rip this out of my cold dead clammy hands and i will still come back as a ghost and i will still be penning poems about it.
it isn't even love. the word we use the most i think is "passion". devotion, obsession, necessity. my favorite little fact about the magic of artists - "abracadabra" means i create as i speak. we make because it sluices out of us. because we look down and our hands are somehow already busy. because it was the first thing we knew and it is our backbone and heartbreak and everything. because we have given up well-paying jobs and a "real life" and the approval of our parents. we create because - the cliche again. it's like breathing. we create because we must.
you create because you're greedy.
#every time someones like ''AI will replace u" im like. u will have to fucking KILL ME#there is no replacement here bc i am not filling a position. i am just writing#and the writing is what i need to be doing#writeblr#this probably doesn't make sense bc its sooo frustrating i rarely speak it the way i want to#edited for the typo wrote it and then was late to a meeting lol#i love u people who mention my typos genuinely bc i don't always catch them!!!! :) it is doing me a genuine favor!!!#my friend says i should tell you ''thank you beta editors'' but i don't know what that means#i made her promise it isn't a wolf fanfiction thing. so if it IS a wolf thing she is DEAD to me (just kidding i love her)#hey PS PS PS ??? if ur reading this thinking what it's saying is ''i am financially capable of losing this'' ur reading it wrong#i write for free. i always have. i have worked 5-7 jobs at once to make ends meet.#i did not grow up with access or money. i did not grow up with connections or like some kind of excuse#i grew up and worked my fucking ASS OFF. and i STILL!!! wrote!!! on the side!!! because i didn't know how not to!!!#i do not write for money!!!! i write because i fuckken NEED TO#i could be in the fucking desert i could be in the fuckken tundra i could be in total darkness#and i would still be writing pretentious angsty poetry about it#im not in any way saying it's a good thing. i'm not in any way implying that they're NOT tryna kill us#i'm saying. you could take away our jobs and we could go hungry and we could suffer#and from that suffering (if i know us) we'd still fuckin make art.#i would LOVE to be able to make money doing this! i never have been able to. but i don't NEED to. i will find a way to make my life work#even if it means being miserable#but i will not give up this thing. for the whole world.
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