#on their own personal blog that they took all measures for you to be able to avoid

[galedekarios]

the way some ppl go out of their way to actively seek out appropriately tagged content to get upset about to the point of making several posts in a row abt it... it's like that guy on bike meme tbh

#like it's a post that's not tagged with the main tags #censored names #not rebloggable #critical tags applied #a disclaimer #and in answer to a perfectly valid question #on top of all that the blog in question has you blocked #imagine getting so riled up abt someone not liking your fav any two white guys ship du jour that you want to censor their opinion #on their own personal blog that they took all measures for you to be able to avoid #an opinion that doesn't impact you in any way shape or form #at what point in that chain do you maybe take a look at yourself and take your own advice of touch some grass and providing the content #you want to see lmao #text: personal #tbd

[final-script]

Fashion Love. | LH44

Pairing: Lewis Hamilton x Reader

Sumary: What you think is a mistake is not and becomes one of the best days of your life.

Warnings: English is not my first language !!!There are probably many mistakes (I will correct them later).

A/N: I am learning not to do much introduction, I almost achieve it, but for the moment I do not come with one.

Gif: l8tof1

-------------------------------------

According to your parents, since childhood you had shown interest in everything that had to do with the world of makeup, fashion etc.

At a young age you chose yourself, the clothes you would wear and according to what your parents said, you combined very well the clothes.

To him combine your clothes, over the years, the makeup was added, gradually you were trying colors and some techniques.

It was then that when you finished high school, you had more than decided, that you would dedicate yourself to something related to the wonderful world of fashion.

After doing some research, you had decided on styling, you wanted to learn how to apply to other people, what you liked to do in yourself.

Another thing you started to do as your career progressed was to create a blog and an instagram profile.

They were places where you published all the time of things, opinions about the looks of celebrities in general, published your own looks and gave some advice to measures that you applied and learned.

Like any person, who began to attract attention on the internet, you had begun to receive criticism of all kinds.

From people who admired your content, to people who threw hate at you, for saying that you did not like a certain garment worn by their celebrity, athlete. favorite etc.

The good comments you treasured and the bad ones you rejected, you yourself knew that what you did, you did not do it with bad intention.

Time passed and your influence on the internet grew, even being invited to events in which you came to cross the people of whom you had commented on their look.

Many of them recognized you and even said they agreed with your words.

The moment came when you graduated and again you had to think again about how your life was going to be from that moment.

It cost you a little because you didn’t think that your life on the internet would grow the way it did.

Finally you had decided to apply the styling online, through you and other people with whom you would seek to collaborate.

People liked it, so you did that, your content kept reaching more people and thanks to it, they kept inviting you more and more to events.

(…)

This is how you arrived at the event that you would classify as one of your favorites, since it was where you met a very special person and that would become the love of your life.

(…)

No matter how young I was and what I did, I never thought I would be invited to an event of such magnitude.

Being in a Versace release, you saw it impossible.

And even more you could not believe, when it came to your mail, the invitation to the event and with whom you would share a table.

Nothing more and nothing less than Sir. Lewis Hamilton You quickly responded by asking, if there was no mistake, but that day you received another email saying that it was not a mistake.

Without being able to believe it and after assuming a little bit what was happening, you began to prepare everything for that trip.

(...)

A couple of days before the launch of the collection, I arrived in the city of Cannes, where the event would be.

I went around a little, I generated some content and for me still surprised, I took pictures with some people.

The day of the event I began to preperarme with vast time in advance, dress, shoes and makeup of the simplest to not divert attention from the important.

(...)

They passed by me and took me to the event, when I arrived I was dazzled with everything, they took me some photos, they made me some interviews and to my fortune, I had the pleasure of meeting Donatella and of meeting Dua Lipa, who both were the ones who co-designed the collection.

Photos here photos be, until the moment came when they took my place, which was already occupied by my companion of the evening.

Who, seeing me, stood up to receive me.

L- a pleasure, I'm Lewis. I kiss my hand like a gentleman.

Y/N- I'm Y/N and pleasure is all mine. Definitely not all the photos or videos in the world do justice to her beauty.

L- Let's sit down, I would like to meet the girl who has talked about my looks. At this time I would definitely have wanted the earth to swallow me up.

Y/N- eh… i hope it has not been an offense to you, i apologize if they were.

L- It wasn't at all, I think you helped me go for other styles, which I might never have noticed.

Y/N- I can always show you more. I didn’t know where that came from but, it felt good to say it.

We had a concert until the parade was started.

I took some general photos and videos, then concentrated on what I was watching.

At times I turned to see Lewis and most of the time I found him looking at me, which made him blush.

Y/N- I think you should look ahead, you don’t want to miss anything.

L- I don’t want to lose myself from the beauty by my side either.

Blushing loudly, I looked back in front, trying to calm my heartbeat.

At the end of the passes, Donatella and Dua, went out to greet all those present, we all stood to applaud them.

L- You want to be my companion at the party. Calling my attention.

Y/N- You want to be mine. Again I did not know where my daring came from.

L- I would be delighted.

In the fista I had the opportunity to meet more people who shut me up wonderfully, but most importantly, I also enjoyed the incredible company of Lewis.

L- I know I just know you, but I want to keep seeing you.

Y/N- I liked it a lot too, we can keep talking and when we create it, we can see each other again.

L- It will be a pleasure.

I would definitely remember this day as one of the best in my life.

------------------------------

ANOTHERS

The boss's daughter - Lewis Hamilton x Reader

Little Sainz - Carlos Sainz Jr. x Reader

#lewis hamilton #mercedes amg f1 #lewis hamilton x reader #lewis hamilton imagine #lewis hamilton one shot #lewis hamilton fanfic #f1 imagine #f1 x reader #f1 fanfic #f1 one shot #f1 blurb #f1

[ellisgirl]

Harrison Gray — I Want to Know Every Inch of You Collection Event

Harrison and Body Measurement

I do not own any contents of Ikemen Villains. This story being uploaded in this blog belongs solely to CYBIRD. Please support them by downloading their games and buying their stories. Both English and Japanese are not my mother tongue languages, please keep in mind that there will be mistakes and added words for my own preferences. I translate for my personal entertainment and for my own practice only.

My first time translating harry’s 😭😭😭

Harrison: "Crown's body measurement......”

Kate: "Yes. It seems that it also serves as a medical checkup."

When Victor asked me to take everyone's body measurements, I called Harry first.

In addition to basic information such as height and weight, the record sheet handed out also contains questions tailored to each individual.

Harrison: “Is that sort of thing within the purview of a Fairytale Master's work?”

Kate: “Of course. Because your growth is an important part of our record.”

Harrison: "...No, I won't grow anymore."

Kate: “You never know what the future holds, you know? Above all, I want you all to stay healthy."

Harrison: “Hmm…..”

(...Harry doesn't seem too keen on it.)

(Come to think of it, you also avoided going along with Roger's research.)

(...You don’t like being probed?)

Kate: “I'll make it quick, just bear with me for a minute. Okay?”

As if trying to convince a child who doesn't like injections, Harry took off his jacket.

Harrison: “Just so you know, it's not that I don't like being probed.”

I blinked at Harry's addition, as if he had read my mind.

Harrison: “I just thought you seemed to take on everything."

Kate: "Did you worry about me?"

Harrison: "I don't know....... So, how are you going to find out?"

(It's usual that there is no answer…, but it was easy to understand now.)

My mouth relaxed at Harry's apparent concern for me.

Kate: “Starting with height, weight....., and chest and abdominal circumference."

Harrison: "Understood."

Using a measuring tape, Harry's body is measured as he stands in front of me.

(If you want to measure properly, you need to be in close contact with him...)

If I put the measuring tape on Harry's back, he'll be in a position where I am hugging him from the front.

Even though I know that his body is masculine and robust.

I was strangely conscious, so I applied the tape measure while moving my body away from him a little.

Harrison: “Wouldn't we have to stick together more to get an accurate measurement?”

Kate: "T-That's right..."

He closes the distance when pointed out, but I’m too nervous to look at Harry's body properly.

Harrison: “Don't be shy, why don't you do what you always do?”

Kate: “Always?”

I turn my head and Harry teasingly whispers in my ear.

Harrison: “You clung desperately to me naked when we were shagging and wouldn't leave me. Why are you so shy now?”

Kate: “E-Even if you give me examples of things like that...”

Harrison: “If you want me to recreate the scene, I'll do it.”

Harry pulls my hips closer, slides his knee between my legs, and pushes me up.

Kate: “Nn, it’s no good.”

Harrison: "What's wrong?"

Kate: "...If that happens, we won't be able to measure anything."

Even though I say that, the force with which I push back against Harry's chest is modest.

(......I know exactly what I need to do, I need to get on with measuring.)

(But if Harry comes on to me, I can't resist strongly enough ......)

Harrison: "Haha...your face is bright red. Now that I’ve seen your cute face, I'll be obedient and cooperate with the measurements then.”

Laughing teasingly, Harry took his hand away from mine.

I felt relieved and at the same time realised that my nervousness had eased.

(Maybe Harry was deliberately pressing me to get me used to it.)

I was also pleased to find Harry's teasing mixture of kindness.

In this way, the measurements managed to proceed—

Kate: “Okay, ….now the last item has been filled in. Thank you for your cooperation.”

Harrison: “.....By the way, are you going to do measurements on everyone from now on?”

Kate: "That's right. It seems that everyone is here today, so I'm going to do it all at once."

Harrison: “Hmmm...... Can I do that?”

…

Kate: "Thank you for your help. It was very helpful!"

Harry helped everyone in the Crown with their physical measurements because he had time.

He took the measurements with a tape measure, I recorded them. We divided the roles and the measurements were completed in no time.

(Hehe... Harry is mean, but kind and reliable.)

As I'm falling back in love with him, Harry looks at me with probing eyes.

Harrison: “So, whose body was the best?”

Kate: “Eh..... What do you mean?”

Harrison: “You've examined all of their bodies, haven't you? I'm asking you whose body you found most attractive.”

Harrison: “I'm sure you have your favorite body shape and favorite parts, don’t you?”

Kate: “Even if you say so...”

(I only thought it was good that everyone seemed to be healthy without any major injuries.…)

(......There was only one person I couldn't consciously measure well.)

Kate: “……Harry.”

Harrison: “Hm?”

Kate: “The only thing that made me nervous was your body.”

Harrison: “……..” 0_0

Kate: "Do you believe it's true?"

The heart is invisible, so even if you really mean what you say, sometimes you may not be believed.

But his ability to see through the lies is also his ability to believe. I can tell him how I feel without deception.

Harrison: *blushing* "......I understand. Your words are not a lie."

Harrison: “I never imagined before I met you that there would ever come a time when I would use this ability for love.”

I'm the one who said the embarrassing line, but I feel that Harry, who exposed my heart, is more embarrassed.

Kate: “Hehe. I see you've found a fun use for it.”

Harrison: “......Come to think of it, I've got a record sheet for you too.”

Maybe he was embarrassed, Harry suddenly changed the topic.

Kate: “Yes. I'm also going to measure it later and fill it in.”

Harrison: “Heh...... Who do you let touch your body and measure every inch of it?”

At first, I thought I should ask someone who was available for my body measurement.

(However, after taking everyone's measurements, I realised that even if it's just a physical measurement, touching me is—)

Kate: “—Harry is good.”

After answering, I realised the mistake of my statement.

Kate: “....If it's not Harry, I don't want it.”

After rephrasing it, Harry smiles with a satisfied smile.

Harrison: “Fine. If it has to be me, I'll do as you ask.”

Harrison: “......But before that, I'll get paid for the labour.”

—After a kiss that is too sweet to be called compensation.

Every inch of my body had been thoroughly examined by Harry's hands.

Fin.

Masterlist

#ikemen villains #ikevil #ikemen series #ikemen games #harrison gray #ikevil harrison #ikemen villains collection event #ikevil translations

[nicollekidman]

Hi Abby, I am uncomfortable saying this off anon for a variety of reasons, please do not think one of them is cowardice. I have followed you for years and years. I’ve come to love so much media because of you and always appreciate your takes. I have chosen to unfollow you now. I am a Jewish person who has been so scared and upset about what the state of Israel is doing to Palestinians and am disgusted by the war crimes committed by Israel. At the same time, I have numerous Israeli friends and family members who have been murdered by Hamas in the last few weeks. Civilians visiting for educational and cultural exchange programs, horrifically killed. Your recently reblogged informational post about how Hamas is not a terrorist organization was deeply upsetting. This may not matter at all to you, but I ask that you consider empathy to all people involved in this issue. Decolonization is important. My friends and family are dead. These two facts can coexist. Just wanted to share this with you because I know many people see your blog and are affected by the information you share.

probably shouldn’t answer this at 1am and you’ve already unfollowed so you probably won’t even see this but i just want to ask you why my sharing resources and information about the reality of hamas and it’s current functioning within gaza / its original charter immediately made you think that i don’t care about loss of human life. there was not a single phrase in that post that minimized victims of the october attack, in fact, not a single phrase in that post took a stance on anything, it was purely informational. frankly, i think it was so measured to dissuade from reactions exactly like this, and if i had written it myself, i would’ve done a worse job.

and if you had been able to push past your knee jerk reaction to reading “they are not a terrorist organization” you would recognize that clarifying language and correcting misconceptions is one of the most important things we can do, both going forward in ending this genocide and looking back on how and why lives have been lost in both israel and palestine.

i have personal empathy and grief for your situation, and i’m so sorry you have suffered loss amongst your community and loved ones. but your loss does not form a shield behind which you are allowed to hide from truth, or force other people to close their mouths when trying to educate themselves and others. we are currently witnessing ongoing mass death, us-backed genocide, and a hugely successful (in the west) propaganda campaign to make this endeavor as Unknowable as possible, especially to those who have never looked into the reality of life in the region. grounding ourselves in recent history, learning more about words and labels that are thrown around weekly, daily, hourly, SPECIFICALLY to justify and excuse the ongoing campaign of death israel has visited upon the palestinian people for decades…. that is the LEAST we are all responsible for. it is your duty, as someone who has lost friends and loved ones, and it is mine, as someone with eyes on their stupid blog, to make every concerted effort to understand and spread the truth, in context, to enrich our own activism and honor the dead.

saying “decolonization is important” while unfollowing me after years bc i shared information about what hamas is, is so empty and meaningless you might as well have not said it at all. thousands of people are actively and endlessly being murdered behind a smokescreen of Terrorism with the VERY SPECIFIC connotations that holds over the west and the US in particular… attempting to relay information that complicates and clarifies your exact knee jerk reaction is the entire point. i hope one day you are able to look a little closer and recognize that your personal hurt in seeing new information that makes you uncomfortable is not important in the scheme of what we are currently trying to prevent

#writing this on my phone in bed at 1am is maybe not the move but tldr i am so sorry for your loss but nothing that i shared #warranted this reaction or minimized any death in any way #and if you feel like the truth would do that then you have your own work to do about where you stand #i did notice i’ve dropped like 50 followers today and i do not #care #all zionists exit now

[sexydreamgirl]

Hi Hera,

You're one of my favourite blogs on here. Any reassurance I want, I always come to you. I love the way you answer questions and it's always a sophisticated answer. I know you've probably got a lot of asks similar to this but I just want some redirection from you because at this point I'm doubting the law and will probably give up on it soon.

So I have discovered the law of assumption around in August 2021 and my mains goals from that day was to achieve my ideal body, face, job and house. I will admit I was on and off but since May 2022 I started to take it seriously and really persist. But I have been struggling a lot, Neville says your assumptions manifests and even says it should take less than 3 days for you to receive your desire. So I probably have some underlying assumptions, but I do revise at the end of the day that I didn't waver, doubt or spiral. Even if I did have underlying assumptions, my dominant thoughts were my desires so that should manifest. So im just extremely confused. Here's an example of how I approach my desire:

So since June I've been persisting that I will get a job and I do get to the interview stage but then I rejected. Whilst I know it's definitely because of my interview technique because I do get nervous I don't let it affect my thoughts. I persist that my interview went well and i got the job and then the next day I get a phone call saying that the position was filled. I've been rejected 3 times after the interview stage and they were my ideal part time job. I'm currently revising this rejection right now but I might just give up on it.

Hello, my love.

You are not the only person that has reached out to me with a similar experience. This is generally the part where I tell people to restart their manifestation journey so they can have a clean slate to work with. I will never know what exactly goes down in somebody's mind for me to be able to determine exactly what "happened". I don't know if you're not being consistent with your mental diet, if you run back to the old story after 4 minutes of affirming or what your assumptions look like. I can simply work with what I'm told. However, I'll give you my two cents on the predicament you're faced with.

Before I start I'd like to remind you of the fact that failure technically isn't possible with the law of assumption because it will manifest. Regardless of how long it takes, you will have it. You simply can't not have it. The only way you could "fail" at the law of assumption is if you stop remaining loyal to your desires (persisting). Some people have manifested overnight, some within a month, some even longer [It literally took like two years for Neville's brother to manifest a company] but that doesn't matter and you shouldn't use someone else's experience as a way to measure or validate your own. I only bring this up because I strongly dislike this concept that if you haven't manifested within a certain range of time you're doing something wrong. You're not!

Remember, consciousness is the only reality, meaning that what you are accepting as a fact presently is what you experience in the 3D. Stop and think: What am I accepting as a fact right now? Am I "waiting" for my desires? Am I “trying” to manifest? (<- This one specifically is what it sounds like to me.) Back to what I was saying about the time it takes different people to manifest their desires, this will ultimately depend on how long it takes you to appropriate a new state of consciousness. Once you’ve established a clear idea of what your current state of consciousness looks like, drop it completely. Now ask yourself, what do you want your new state of consciousness to look like? Methods are always optional but not necessary as I'm sure you know. All you need is mental diligence. Change your assumptions and persist in them until they harden into fact. Live in the end, live in the 4D, accept the fact that you are not separate from your desires. They are in your possession already. Don't forget your conception of self, she's the foundation of your new story.

Change the way you perceive manifestation and the world around you. Don't forget that you are always in charge of circumstances and the pen is in YOUR hand. There is no better outcome, just what you choose to experience and not experience. Reject the evidence of your senses. Turn your attention away from any circumstance that challenges your new state of consciousness. Become so confident and so consistent to the new story that you are unfazed by the facts before you. You already know you're the operant power so why would they bother you in the first place? In your reality, you will always get to win.

Don't be afraid of a fresh start. You won't be starting from zero, you'll be starting from experience now that you know what to do instead. Don't lose hope in something that is your birthright. You cannot fail!

Before I end this, I'd just like to say, please don't let giving up be an option. I understand that you may feel frustrated or upset because of what your journey looks like, but please don't give up. You are so so so so close to having everything you want. Think about the fact that manifesting your desires is so much easier than having to actually work for them like any sleeping person. You are truly so lucky to be one of few (out of billions, that is) to know about the law of assumption. All your desires ask of you is that you don't give up on them in the 4D. You have me and a whole community right behind you rooting for your success. Don't give up.

#the way this ended up being incredibly extensive like it isn't practically ⅓ of one of my future posts #hera's greatest hits

[mrsshabana]

Hey there, i Just found your blog and i think i read all the posts already. ♥️♥️♥️

So I've been thinking abt this for a while:

Let's say Gyu has a lover, they're together for a long time, she gets sick and he offers to turn her into a demon to save her, she refuses and says she'll just find his in her next life. However, gyu can't bear the thought of losing her so he turns her against her will. Once she becomes a demon she's very upset so she keeps trying to die (trying to cut her own head, going after demon slayers, trying to walk out during the day)

How would Gyutaro (canon and fanon) react to this?

Wow! Thank you so much! I know I have a lot of posts so that means so much to me that you enjoyed them enough to read them all. 💚 Thanks for the question! (And sorry it took me awhile to respond) But I think this is such an interesting idea, and I hope you enjoy what I came up with!

Gyutaro turns you into a demon against your will

TW: Mentions of suicide and depression

Gyutaro is selfish. And he indulges in this selfishness when he decides to turn you into a demon against your will

He can't lose you. He just can't. You are the first person to accept him and all of his flaws, loving him through them all. And he knows he will never be able to find another person like you. And even if he could, he doesn't want to. He doesn't want another version of you, he only wants the you in this moment. The you that he has fallen deeply in love with.

He will do anything to keep you. Which is why he resorts to turning you into a demon.

When you react negatively to being turned, Gyutaro will be very upset with you. He'll say, "How could you be so ungrateful? I saved you! You would have died if it were not for me!"

The two of you will fight about it for hours, until Gyutaro gets too pissed off and decides to leave. He'll stay gone until he feels he's calmed down enough to have a proper conversation with you. Only to return, seeing you trying to decapitate yourself.

He'd run to you, slapping the sword from your hands, "What the fuck are you thinking?! You tryin' to get yourself killed?"

"Yes, I am! Because I much rather die than be a demon!"

Hearing you say this would break Gyutaro's heart. Throughout the course of your entire relationship you've never seen Gyutaro get very emotional. But this will make him burst out in tears.

He'll hold you close, and bawl his eyes out. Spewing out apologies and promises of making sure you can live happily as a demon.

He hates himself for what he has put you through, and will dedicate his life to making you happy. Giving you expensive jewelry and the prettiest humans to feast on.

All he truly wants is for the two of you to be happy together.

But, he can't have that. Not after what he's done. Being turned into a demon has caused you to spiral down into a deep depression, that even your lover cannot pull you out of.

After your numerous attempts to end your own life, Gyutaro will resort to more serious measures.

He will purposefully underfeed you so you are too weak to fight back. Too weak to try to escape the lair that he keeps you hidden away in. The only way in and out is through travelling through Daki's obi. Every time you try to enter it, you get spit back out.

There's no escape from Gyutaro. He keeps you locked away. He can't risk you hurting yourself and at this point you have become more of a hostage than a lover.

The lack of nutrition has left you a pliant husk. Having no other choice than to be the model lover for Gyutaro.

If you are good and give him the affection that he wants, then he may spare a limb for you to eat.

He hopes that one day things will go back to how they used to be.

But unfortunately the damage has already been done. And there is no going back.

#gyutaro #gyutaro shabana #gyutaro x reader #tw depression #tw suicide #gyutaro x y/n #replies #gyutaro headcanons #kny headcanons

[chierafied]

December Drabbles Day 8 - Curiosity Caught the Cake

Read on AO3.

Banner fan art by the amazing @sayuri-liu

For @cakeit0n. Cake for Cake! (Haha I'm hilarious.) You're such a great, talented person and I love seeing your blog on my dash! Thank you for everything you've done for the fandom! 💙

Day 8 - Curiosity Caught the Cake

Sesshoumaru frowned at the sorry excuse of a cake he’d just pulled out from the oven. He pushed back his hair and growled in frustration. He didn’t understand what he was doing wrong, couldn’t figure out how, even at this third attempt, the results he’d produced were so far from the magnificent creation he’d envisioned. He had followed the steps from the instructional YouTube video precisely. He had made notes and studied those, as well. He had meticulously measured each and every ingredient, triple-checked the settings of his oven and taken the utmost care mixing in the various ingredients. 

So where had he strayed? Why was he presented with this lumpy disaster? Sesshoumaru sniffed in disdain and gave the sad mess of a cake a dubious poke with a single claw. 

It was better than his first attempt, that he was willing to concede. He’d never fathomed that baking could be so hard and time-consuming. It had seemed so simple in the video he’d watched several times. And speaking of time, that was a precious resource he was rapidly running out of.    

He couldn’t surprise Kagome with a cake like this. She deserved nothing short of perfection and he would not fail as a provider. He refused to concede victory to a cake. 

He tossed the cake into the bin to join its two older egregious siblings and rolled up his sleeves. It was time to start a new batter. 

*

Kagome shuffled her various bags aside, digging her keys out of her pocket. She’d left work a bit early. It was Christmas, after all, and she had a date night planned with Sesshoumaru, featuring a dinner and a movie. She had other, more specific plans Sesshoumaru had no idea about. She loved to surprise him. She had a gift to wrap, a bunch of groceries to whip into a dinner, candles to light and new, special lingerie to slip into. But she’d have plenty of time to get everything ready for that evening. Sesshoumaru, ever the workaholic, would probably stay overtime, date night or not. 

Kagome unlocked the door and shuffled in. With a huff, she let all her bags slide down so she could unzip her ankle boots. Sans shoes, she was about to start gathering up all her purchases again, when something in her eyeline made her freeze.  

Sesshoumaru’s shoes, all polished black leather, neatly waiting in their usual spot in the entranceway. Kagome frowned at them. Was he home this early? Surely not! 

Her plethora of bags forgotten, Kagome let her curiosity lead her deeper into the vast labyrinth of their house. She poked into several rooms before at last she was able to locate her spouse, in the least likely place in the whole building: the kitchen.  

He snapped to attention, a vaguely guilty look in his eyes, as if occupying his own damn kitchen was a criminal act. 

“Welcome home,” he said stiffly, clutching the mixing bowl to him like a shield. 

“Thank you. Why are you at home, exactly?” Kagome tilted her head. “I thought you’d still be at work.” 

“I took the day off.” 

“You did?”  

“Yes.” 

Kagome blinked because Sesshoumaru’s reply didn’t compute in her poor brain. Her husband never took a day off. Not randomly and unprompted like this. He had to have a reason, and that only piqued her curiosity more. 

“What are you doing?” she asked, tiptoeing closer. 

Sesshoumaru’s shoulders slumped with his sigh of defeat. 

“I am working on your surprise, which now has been ruined. Failure has been the theme for today.” 

Well, that sounded uncharacteristically morose for Sesshoumaru. Kagome stopped next to her husband and nudged him with her shoulder. 

“Want to talk about it?” 

“Not particularly.” He scowled at his mixing bowl. “I just wished to do this one thing for you, but all my attempts have been to no avail.” 

“May I?” 

Sesshoumaru shrugged. Kagome took that as a yes and dipped her finger in the batter he was working on. She brought her finger to her mouth and, as she was deliberately maintaining eye contact, saw the exact moment Sesshoumaru’s pupils dilated as her distraction hit home. And then she had to close her eyes in bliss. 

“Yum,” she sighed. “Whatever you’re making is absolutely delicious.” 

Sesshoumaru gave her one slow blink. “It is?” 

He sounded adorably baffled Kagome couldn’t help smiling. 

“Yes. I can’t wait to eat it.” 

He was silent for a moment, studying her intently, his nostrils flaring. Then, his voice quiet and edged with a hesitant vulnerability, he asked: “You do not consider it ruined?” 

Kagome cupped his cheeks, her heart swelling at her chest as she pressed a soft kiss on his jaw. “I think it’s going to be perfect.” 

#sesskag #sesskag fan fiction #sesskag fanfiction #sesskag fic #SessKag December Drabbles #chie writes #fic: sk

[thegirlintheredchair]

السلام عليكم ورحمة الله وبركاته

Look who has emerged from the depths of her own mind to write a blog post. I haven’t written in ages. I had planned on writing “Letters to Allah” (a sort of summary of the month and what I learned) in my journal after each month but I sadly didn’t keep up. 😕

It is birthday month! (No, today is not my birthday). I’ve never liked birthdays and I’ve never celebrated them (apart from treating myself to good food, donating or planting a tree) but if anything, I use birthdays as a measure for my spiritual, mental and worldly growth.

I feel like I’ve aged 50 years since the beginning of this year and I am definitely not the same person at all. I feel like two different people tbh. (I would like to think I’ve progressed mentally and spiritually. Lol).

It has been a tumultuous year so I’m highlighting 31 lessons I’ve learned this year before turning 31. Some are constant lessons and some are new ones.. I hope this benefits you too.

Prioritise Allah over everything, especially over your desires and whims…this life is for His obedience and to gain His pleasure. In other words, the deen of Allah requires sacrifice. We are already sold… Allah has already promised us heaven granted we place Him over everything else. Yani there is nothing more beneficial to a person than seeking and possessing the pleasure of Allah. If He is pleased, He will give you contentment in all your affairs, in this life and the hereafter. Guaranteed! In short, Don’t lose sight of the akhira. Nothing in this world is promised. The reality is that there is only one reality!

Take time out to send salutations on our beloved Prophet (ﷺ) and you will be amazed by the change you’ll see in your life. I am currently not in the habit of doing this daily but I’ve experienced its benefits. My aim is usually to send salutations at least 500 times daily and countless times on a Friday. The shortest darood shareef is simply his name. I also like this one: "صلى الله علی سیدنا محمد و آله و سلم"

Lots of people need to hear this: Please take your Salah seriously! What even are you if you can’t say your five daily prayers?? It is the bare minimum. They make up less than 50 minutes of your day! You are depriving yourself of not being able to enjoy the comfort of talking to Allah. Also like how dare you abandon the one who provides for you continuously and unconditionally?? How do you intend to have a productive day when you don’t start it with Fajr? How do you intend to sleep peacefully if you don’t end your day with Isha?

DON’T.STOP.MAKING.DUA!! It took me a long time to idk internalize this? Lol. Yani I went through periods of asking for something diligently and then not asking for it at all. Because you know your hope wavers. And that’s okay but don’t stop making dua. It’s like that quote, (I forget who it’s by; I think it’s by Umar (RA)) “if He has inspired you to make dua, know that He wants to grant you what you’re asking.” Besides Allah never says no to our duas. He only has three response: “There is no Muslim who calls upon Allah, but that Allah will give him one of three answers: He will quickly fulfil his supplication, He will store it for him in the Hereafter, or He will divert an evil from him similar to it.” (Musnad Aḥmad 11133). Pair your dua with tahajjud and watch miracles unfold!! ✨️ ("The dua made at tahajjud is like an arrow which does not miss its target. - Imam Ash-Shafi’")

Learn the etiquettes of making Dua (I might do a separate post on this) but for real don’t just start with what you want. I’ve been looking into this lately and this is what I’ve learned so far (briefly): Start by Praising Him. Call Him by His Greatest names. (Al-Rahman, Al-Raheem, Al Ahad etc).Thank Him for the countless blessings he bestows on you. Every.Single.Day. Then pour your heart out!!!! And ask. Please ask unapologetically and shamelesslesly? He is the Lord of Impossible. The Lord of Miracles. Who else even is there in your corner?? End the dua with salutations on the Prophet (ﷺ). “Du’aa’ is suspended between heaven and earth and none of it is taken up until you send blessings upon your Prophet (ﷺ)” - ‘Umar ibn al-Khattaab [al-Tirmidhi (486). That being said, you can make Dua at literally any time.

Sit with the righteous. This is sooooo important. You need these circles that talk about Allah. The Sunnah of our beloved Prophet (ﷺ). The Noble Quran. These are your anchors for sanity in this world tbh. (Yes the internet lectures are good but if you have actual physical circles with real tangible people thats even better) These circles lift your imaan (much needed in todays world), keep you sane in the face of adversity; I honestly wouldn’t know how to solve or navigate my problems, if it weren’t for Islam. I am where I am today because of His religion. Its like that quote by Umar (RA) [can you tell he’s one of my favorite companions 🙃] “We were the most humiliated people on earth and God gave us honor through Islam. If we ever seek honor through anything else, God will humiliate us again.”

An attitude of Gratitude. This year has been a huge lesson in this. It made me be thankful to Him in every situation. Gratitude brings abundance, it unlocks the fullness of life. It’s the little pleasures in live (that we take for granted) a roof over our head, hot meals, the presence of parents and siblings that care and love you. A family that practices the Deen and has the same mind-set. Sunsets, the moon. Friends like family, your health, an unblocked nose. Our own existence as Muslims! (We’re from amongst the guided, imagine if we weren’t?) Just there’s far more to be thankful for than to dwell on that one problem(s) you’re facing. Gratitude needs to be our default position. This year I made a concise effort to become a person of Shukr and it has kept me anchored and has brought me back from moments where I was about to give up hope. 🥹🫶🏻

#PocketsofPeace. Sit with the Noble Quran, ponder over its meaning. Pick a surah for a year or go through random ayats. No amount of time with it will ever be enough. The Honorable Quran is like the ocean, the deeper you dive into its meaning, the more you’ll discover. Also this will build your faith. We live in end times and our resolute faith is the only thing that can save us!!! Faith is the only thing that has survived the test of time. It pivots you back to the one thing that will always remain constant in your life no matter how much the world modernizes; Allah.

Qadr Allah; Tawakkul. Every year I say I’ve internalized it and every year I struggle with it. I will say that this year this has strengthened in comparison to last year. Qadr is the sixth pillar of faith (not believing in it can take you outside of the fold of Islam). The thing with Qadr is that it is only appreciated in hindsight, or viewed in the past tense. Your way forward to navigate Qadr is through your Tawakkal in your Lord and your duas. The Prophet (ﷺ) said (on his son Ibrahims death): “The eyes are shedding tears, and the heart is grieved, and we will not say expect what pleases our Lord” (Sahih Bukhari 1303)

There is always khair in delay. “What is meant for you will reach you even if it is between two mountains. And what isn’t meant for you will not reach you even if it is between your lips” –Imam Ghazali

“But perhaps you hate a thing and it is good for you; and perhaps you love a thing and it is bad for you. And Allah knows, while you know not” (2:216)

Define your boundaries! especially if you're an empath. Whether it’s at home, work, university, or even friendships. You are your biggest advocate! I have to say this though that learning and knowing more about my religion has helped me become firm on setting them and not budging from them or feeling guilty about them or thinking that people will think I'm weird. Define your boundaries from the beginning so no one gets to take advantage of your empathetic nature. You can be empathetic and still say no.

The other end of the spectrum is just as shitty (excuse my French). This one is a lesson solely for me. I wish to explain this one no further.

Log out of social media once in a while! It is refreshing. There’s less noise because you are only exposed to the lives and opinions of those immediately around you (as God intended. Lol). This might not be a hot take, but we aren’t meant to hear every thought, see each other’s lives or know about people’s emotions who we will probably never see face to face.

In the same vein, be mindful of media you consume. When I took a break and came back, it just made me realize how much none of it matters??? Likewise being always on SM we are constantly receiving information. Like Too Much Information. I don’t think were supposed to crowd our brains like that. Take at least 24 hours off of social media every week. You’ll thank me later.

Peace of mind over everything. Im a big advocate for this! “When a thing disturbs the peace of your heart, give it up.” -Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ).” [al-Zuhd wal-Raqā’iq 1147]

You are on your own, you can’t rely on people to do what’s important to you. If it’s important to you, you’ll have to do it yourself. No one is going to step up. You need to show up for yourself!

Keep Husn Adh Dhan (thinking good of other people). Boy do I struggle with this one! People can be bone deep kind, loving and self-reflective but can still be selfish in certain situations. People can be well meaning, generous, sociable and easy going and still hold deep seated opinions that turn them into vicious little bullies. Every person is a kladeiscope and they will surprise you. (I don’t think you can ever fully know another person) You will surprise yourself too. It’s not a warning and it's not a judgement and it's not an excuse either. It’s also not a reason to stop trying or to stop trusting. (Even though I’m still struggling) it is just a fact! I understand the concept of Husn Adh Dhan, and I’d like to think this year I’ve internalized this a little? But I have a long way to go.. May Allah help make it easy to distinguish who is gold and who is gold plated.

Privacy is power!! A quiet life is so underrated! SM and capitalism and culture has put such a significant emphasis on the definition of success as fame, being known, having an accolade of worldly accomplishments and excessive wealth. There is so much power in anonymity. Your life does not have to be a grand spectacle for others to have a worth. You don’t need that kind of validation bro! Plus it saves you from so much Ayn!

Trust your gut. Vibes and energy don’t lie. If something is off about a situation or a person. It means it is off. Intuition is God’s gift! And women have it down to a science.

Cut music out of your daily life. I swear to you, you could be doing much better stuff with your time than numbing your brain with beats. Also I feel it opens the path for you to commit other sins and just look at sinning in a different light? Do I make sense? Lol. Replace that with nasheeds or Qur’anic recitation. You’ll end up memorizing a few ayats too (or a whole surah). It’s a win!

Not everything needs a reaction. Learn to walk away. Spent your energy and your time wisely.

Make Dhikr a part of your daily routine. Your heart is your most hardworking muscle but it needs to rest too! (please, Im trying to be poetic) "Verily in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest." (13:28)

A Litmus test for choosing a spouse: the single most important decision you'll ever make as a woman is choosing the father of your children, everything else is secondary to that. If he is God-fearing and God-loving, you have a winner!

Learn the difference between people who are good in general and people who are good for you. Not everyone will understand you or has the same heart as you and that’s okay. Move on don’t keep waiting for the same effort. Some people are just meant to be acquaintances.

Pray for your parents. They put on a tough act for us. Pray for their emotional and mental well-being and that they get to see you successful in both worlds.

Respect and understanding over love. If some one claims to love you and doesn't respect you, they don't actually love you.

Reflecting on your own destructive habits and working towards fixing them is self-care. You have to work towards change; quitting that sin you keep going back to, looking at what needs to go or what needs to be added for your life to move forward. People usually assume self-care is about indulgence (self-worship) or doing whatever you want (selfish). I think it’s more about doing things that are healthy for you.

Cut out people who think you’re arguing or personally attacking them every time you try and solve an issue or express your emotions. It is draining and mentally exhausts you. If someone cannot tolerate you making an effort in communication (read ask clarifying questions) and sharing what you feel, distance yourself from them. No one is a mind reader!

Communication without comprehension is a waste. You could be sharing your most darkest, scariest vulnerabilities with a person and not be reciprocated even with words. I suffer from incomprehension sometimes (read come off as cold). I pray Allah makes me better at easing someone's suffering in whatever capacity I'm capable of.

Be quick to apologize when you know you've hurt someone. Trust me it will take nothing away from you. Even if it was unintentional, it’s so easy to just apologize and move on. I personally think it helps maintain the trust in any relationship.

If you’ve read till the end, congratulations to you!🤝🏻

Theres been a lot more changes, lots of things i started doing differently that have helped me grow as a person. I like the current me, i feel like i can handle certain situations better than i wouldve last year. Its the small victories that count ✌🏻

Hope you related and benefited from some of these lessons/experiences. May Allah be pleased with us and give us a beautiful end to our lives here. Ameen. ✨️

Love, Phi 🕊

#turning 31 #31 things i learned before turning 31 #birthday month #birthday week #surreal #pagesofsilver #writing after ages #tell me which point you relate to most #still cant reply to people on tumblr #may allah be pleased with me #jazkallah khiar for reading

[ilikekidsshows]

You know, I actually saw this one art in which the artist made a Cat!Rose design (I cannot find it, otherwise I would link it), and they said they did it because they thought it would be funny to see sweet lil Rose having the Power of Destruction™

So now I'm curious, do you think a Cat!Rose could work? And on a more general sense, what other Miraculous do you see working for her, besides the Pig?

Holy moly it took me a long time to get to this, sorry about that. I've been suffering from some major writer's block but now that's cleared up.

We’ve seen Rose willing to shield others even with her own body in ‘Desperada’, so she’d definitely have that aspect of being the Black Cat to a Ladybug down. She’s a protector more than a fighter, so she’d definitely use the power of destruction in a measured manner. In addition, the show does imply that she can get hard if she needs to, so she’d still actually use Cataclysm instead of saving it indefinitely like an actually passive personality might. Adrien’s greatest character strength is his kindness and he is the perfect pick for the Black Cat Miraculous because of that. Rose’s kindness would work much the same way, she’d know to use Destruction with kindness.

Frankly, I see Rose as a very similar Black Cat holder to Adrien in some ways. I think she’d love being seen as powerful and competent, especially when she’s helping others out. She’s also a real romantic, so she’d love the whole masked hero thing, and she wouldn’t have to suffer the downsides of her only friend being someone in a mask, since she has more friends to begin with than Adrien. However, this also means that Plagg doesn’t really have much to teach her about not conforming, considering her preferred singing style is screamo. If we look at the entire Kitty Section aesthetic, this girl is already a punk. That means that she could be a bit more likely to actually be down with some of Plagg’s ideas, although I’m not sure how Rose would react to Plagg’s more cattish behavior. Rose is a former victim of Chloé, so would she be able to sympathize with Plagg’s initial front enough to realize that it’s a front? That’s certainly something a fanfic author could tackle. Regardless, I do really like the idea of Plagg getting a partner who’s as nice to him as Rose could be.

Another challenge would be Rose’s capability of giving Plagg clear boundaries like Adrien does. I’ve theorized previously on this blog that Plagg showing off more control of Cataclysm in the series is a direct result of Adrien’s influence, of Plagg learning from him as much as Adrien learns from him. A partnership between a human and their bond creature that’s based on similarity will often lead to complacency, but there’s also a possibility of Plagg’s more outwardly brash personality steamrolling Rose’s more outwardly contained one, especially early in the partnership. Growth comes from conflict, from facing different situations and ideas than you’re used to. However, since Rose does have reserves of inner strength, what role that would play in the status quo or breaking it would also need to be addressed. There’s a possibility that after the initial situation of Plagg calling the shots, Rose will grow to be more assertive, but there’s also a chance of that situation causing a lot of negative feelings underneath the surface.

Rose and Plagg would be a challenging pair to balance. They can’t be too in-synch, or there won’t be growth. Similarly, they also can’t be in too much conflict because that will turn the partnership negative. There would need to be something that leads to them understanding each other, but said understanding can’t just be a given.

However, if you can get the writing balance down, this team is worth the effort, they just have very nice vibes all around.

As for other Miraculouses for Rose, I did say she’s a protector, so obviously the Turtle is an option. However, she is also a very giving person, there’s a reason her canon matchup has the ability Gift. As such, I would say that the Butterfly would be a very good match for her, since that Miraculous, when used correctly, is all about giving to others and empowering them.

#miraculous ladybug #miraculous tales of ladybug and chat noir #rose lavillant #kwami compatibility #kwami swap #ml meta

[pengychan]

[The Great Ace Attorney] A Case of Identity - Ch. 9

Summary: On that fateful night in Lowgate cemetery, the bullet finds its target in Enoch Drebber. When he awakens he’s locked behind an iron mask, facing a lifetime of imprisonment as the mass murderer who survived a botched execution - the Professor. However, help is afoot. Characters: Enoch Drebber, Esmeralda Tusspells, Herlock Sholmes, Yujin Mikotoba, Tobias Gregson, Gina Lestrade, Mael Stronghart Rating: T Prologue and all other chapters will be tagged as ‘case of identity’ on my blog.

A/N: Is this update late? Yes. Do I have excuses? No. Sorry, guys.

***

“I don’t know nuttin’. I ain’t no diver.”

“You bragged about being the best diver in the East End not five minutes ago.”

“I lied.”

“Uuuugh.”

As Gina Lestrade stuffed yet another buttered crumpet in her mouth - Sholmes had added a generous dollop of honey on each, for good measure, before disappearing in the kitchen - Inspector Gregson seemed remarkably close to tearing his own hair out. Mikotoba half-expected him to explode, but he seemed to be making an herculean effort to remain calm. 

Well. Relatively calm. Mikotoba suspected the man had not been entirely calm a single day in his life, at least since joining Scotland Yard.

“Gina, you are not in trouble,” Mikotoba said, Iris safely asleep in the crook of his arm. The statement gained him a doubtful look; the child seemed still unsure, although hot tea and crumpets had done a lot to lower her guard. Come to think of it, she must have been ravenously hungry; who knew when she’d last had a proper hot meal. 

“You said the’ Yard’s lookin’ for me,” the girl replied, eyes turning back to the sketch on the small table before the armchair she was huddled on. She couldn’t read what was written on it, but she could recognize her face, and she could tell what it meant - she was a wanted person across London. 

“... Well. You may be in trouble with Scotland Yard, sure enough, but you are safe here and we’re going to help you. Most of all, we want to understand why they’re looking for you. The Inspector here has a theory, and--”

“You brought me ‘ere,'' Gina cut him off, turning to look at Gregson, narrowing her eyes. She seemed wary, but most of all confused. “If you’re from the Yard, why hide me?”

Gregson set his jaw a moment before answering. “The Lord Chief Justice wouldn’t start a large-scale manhunt for a simple diver, sunshine. Something about all this smells off.”

“Like th’ fish in your pocket?”

“Yes, sort of-- how do you know what’s in my pockets?”

“I checked. While you carried me.”

Gregson’s face flushed red. “I thought you were barely conscious!”

She seemed awfully pleased by the reaction. “I was.”

“Then how--”

“I’m the best diver in all of th’ East End. Cleanin’ pockets in my sleep.”

“So you admit you’re a diver!”

“... Maaaaybe.”

Gregson leaned forward, elbows resting on his knees. “Well, sunshine. Maybe you took something from the pockets of the wrong man, and maybe this someone is the most powerful individual in London bar the Queen and the Prime Minister, and maybe he’s determined to get to you so he can have it back. So maybe, if you came clean and told us what it is, we may be able to help you out of this mess. What do you say?”

Gina looked back at him, and the self-satisfied expression faltered. Mikotoba could see the realization sinking in: she was in over her head into something much bigger than herself, and no amount of pickpocketing skills and disappearing acts in dimly-lit alleys was going to be enough to get her out of it. She looked down, and swallowed. “I--”

“LUNCH!” 

The kitchen door was thrown open and Sholmes came in, surrounded by a frankly concerning amount of smoke. He was carrying four plates in precarious balance, each of them full of horribly burnt sausages and eggs.

Gregson groaned. “Sholmes, we’re trying to--”

“Can’t solve a case on an empty stomach!” Sholmes declared, putting down the plates. “Isn’t that right, my good doctor?”

Mikotoba, who had precisely no intention to put anything cooked by Sholmes in his mouth - a sentiment shared by Gregson, going by the look on his face - nodded. “Of course. But the crumpets were quite enough for me, I believe they’ll see me through until dinner tim--”

“I’ll have his part,” Gina said, and unceremoniously snatched the plate. To Sholmes’ obvious delight she dove in, shoving food in her mouth without a single comment on how badly burned it was. It would have been an amusing sight, if not for the thought that crossed Mikotoba’s mind again.

How long has she truly gone without a filling meal?

“See, that’s the spirit,” Sholmes grinned, and sat across from her. “Perhaps you’re in a better mood for conversation now that your hunger is being sated?”

Gina looked over, chewing on some sausage. She seemed to debate whether to respond for a moment, then shrugged. “... So if I stole somethin’ important, why do you want it? Why not let Lord Whatshisface have it?”

“You see, Miss Lestrade,” Sholmes said with a smile, putting more woefully burnt scrambled eggs on her plate from Gregson’s own untouched one. “We believe the Lord Chief Justice has done something quite horrible to an innocent man - leaving him to languish in prison for crimes he did not commit.”

Gina frowned, and stuck another forkful of food in her mouth before speaking through it. “Wot’s that to do wit’ me?”

“We believe that whatever you… relieved him of that day at the docks is crucial evidence of his misdeed; at least, the timing and circumstances suggest so. That is likely why he’s so desperate to have it back. Now, if we could get our hands on it instead, we could make sure he’s exposed and the man he wronged is released from prison. It would be vital evidence.”

Gina Lestrade rolled her eyes, but had the good grace to swallow her mouthful of burnt egg before she scoffed. Loudly. “You’re bein’ funny just now,” she muttered, causing Gregson to frown. 

“Can’t see what’s so funny about it, sunshine.”

“You said he’s th’ most powerful man in London. Wot’s evidence goin’ to do?”

There was an undeniable truth to her words, and she had hit a sore spot, if the way Inspector Gregson flinched was of any indication. “Well… it’s… in a court of law…”

“He’s a Lord, innit? The likes o’ im don’t care ‘bout evidence. They get away all the time.”

A brief silence, then Gregson straightened himself, pulling the brim of his hat down over his eyes. “... Not this time, sunshine. You have my word. He won’t get away with this.”

She wrinkled her nose. “... Ain’t he your boss?”

“That will make no difference. If he did what we suspect he has done, he ought to pay. And I will not under any circumstances let him get his hands on you.”

“That’s rich. A copper protectin’ a diver.”

“You’re just a little girl.”

A forkful of egg stopped in mid-air, and Gina stared back at Inspector Gregson as though struck. For a moment Mikotoba expected her to protest - say that she was not a little girl, she was the best diver the East End had ever seen - but instead she kept staring in silence for a few moments, mouth slightly agape, before looking down. She didn’t seem insulted: just taken aback, and oddly saddened. In the middle of the large armchair she looked smaller than ever, and something in Mikotoba’s chest ached. It must have been a long time indeed since she last got to be just a little girl with someone to protect her - if she ever had been.

Please, Yujin. Find the woman and help her child. It’s the last favor I can ask of you.

Mikotoba swallowed, looking down at Iris’ sleeping face. It took him a dreadful effort to push all thoughts of Genshin out of his mind, and focus on Sholmes’ voice as he spoke. 

“You have nothing to worry about, Miss Lestrade,” He grinned at her. “You have a copper, soon to be world-famous detective, and a doctor at your service. I daresay you’re safer than the Queen herself. We would however appreciate your help in solving this case, so we can remove this threat to your safety altogether.”

Gina hesitated, and turned back to Mikotoba. She seemed to me most reassured by him, perhaps on account of having seen him with a baby in his arms almost as soon as she awoke. He smiled. 

“We would be very grateful indeed if you could tell us all you know.”

“I…” a sigh, and she scowled down at her half-empty plate. “I don’t recall,” she finally mumbled.

“Don’t recall?”

“... I was at the docks. As you said. I remember that.”

“That must have been when you picked the Lord Chief Justice’s pockets clean,” Gregson muttered, and the child nodded.

“Hu-uh. Was lookin’ for a good target.”

“Awful choice there. And then?”

“Nuttin’.”

Gregson frowned, leaning forward. “What do you mean, nothing! You surely did something, or else we wouldn’t all be in this mess!”

“I don’t remember nuttin’! I was at th’ docks and then-- I remember lots o’ water. Cold.”

All annoyance vanished from Gregson’s face, and he leaned back in his seat. “Ah, yes. You…” He shifted a little, as though uncomfortable. “You fell in the Thames.”

“There was a nurse… a nice lady… there was you. You carried me. Said you’d keep me safe.”

Gregson cleared his throat. “Yes, well-- I do intend to,” he mumbled, pulling down the brim of his hat. Sitting next to him, Sholmes smiled brightly and clapped his hands. 

“Well! It seems you forgot quite a bit about that eventful day, Miss Lestrade. And all the relevant things to our case too! Unfortunate, that. What’s the doctor’s take on it?”

Mikotoba reached to put a hand on Gina’s upper back. “It’s not uncommon, after a traumatic experience. And she had a fever, too. It usually comes back after some time and rest.”

“So I’m goin’ to remember?”

“I’m sure you will, and if you could tell us all you recall we’d be very grateful.”

“... I see. So that’s the catch.”

Mikotoba shook his head. “There is no catch. You don’t have to earn our help. If you cannot recall, we’ll find another way to solve the case and keep you safe. Isn’t that right, Sholmes?”

“Of course!” Sholmes gave an enthusiastic nod. “My fair lady, we wouldn’t dream of leaving you to fend for yourself against the might of Britain’s judicial system incarnate! And besides, Inspector Gregson here is more than ready to cover my fee out of his own pocket. Oh! Gregson! I have mentioned I have been considering changing to an hourly fee?”

“What, you-- agh--! I mean-- uuuugh!” Gregson rubbed his face, which had seemed to rapidly turn into several different colors under Gina’s puzzled gaze. “I mean-- yes. Of course. There is no catch for you, sunshine,” he forced out. “But for my sanity’s sake, try to remember.”

Gina laughed. It was a sudden sound, and it caused Iris to startle with a surprised sound. Gregson grumbled, but he didn’t complain again as Gina muttered “deal” and shoved another forkful of eggs in her mouth.

***

“Of course you realize, we can’t just sit around and wait for her to remember before we act.”

“Well, I for one am not sitting. You should try spending a couple of hours a day upside down on your chair, Inspector. All that blood to your head will clear your thoughts wonderfully! Or make you black out. But the return to consciousness may just bring forth an epiphany!”

Tobias Gregson, who at the moment very much wished he had followed the family tradition as shopkeepers and never became an Inspector at all, glared at the spot where Sholmes’ head would have been had he not decided to turn upside down like a circus monkey. “What I am saying is that we have no time to waste!” he snapped at the detective’s slippers. 

“Ah, did I get you concerned about my new hourly fee policy, Inspector?”

“There is a man locked in prison as we speak, in case you forgot.”

“Oh! Of course, Mr. Drebber. I almost did forget.”

“Remarkable, considering that you have his head in your living room,” Gregson grunted, and turned to look at the head in question. It had been moved from the table and was covered with a cloth before Gina Lestrade could see it, but its presence remained unnerving.

“Well, not quite his head. It’s a wax replica, made with remarkable craftsmanship and-- ah, Mikotoba! Both our guests are back to sleep, I hope?”

“Indeed. Both Gina and Iris are back in bed. Sholmes, you really should stop doing that.”

“It gets all the blood flowing to the brain, and helps me think better!”

“That is not how this works.”

“How would you know?”

“I have a degree in medicine, for one.”

“Ah, yes. That is why I call you ‘my good doctor’, after all.” With a sigh and a movement that frankly should not have been possible in Gregson’s opinion, Sholmes returned to a normal sitting position on the armchair. “Well. The Inspector here was saying we cannot wait for the young lady’s memory to return.”

Mikotoba looked over at Gregson with a nod. “I do agree,” he said, to Gregson’s utter relief. There was no love lost between them, mostly due to the fact Mikotoba’s presence was always a sign Sholmes was not far away, but the Japanese doctor did tend to be the most reasonable out of the two. A low bar to step over, that. “We don’t know how long it may take for young Gina to recall the events of that day, and what precisely she took from Lord Stronghart. It may happen tomorrow as well as in six months’ time, for all we know. Or… well. We cannot rule out the possibility she may never remember. We need to think of some way to prove our theory - that the man currently imprisoned at Barclays is not the Professor. Or at least to be absolutely certain ourselves. But I don’t know how--”

“Well, we go see for ourselves, obviously.” Sholmes spoke just as though he had just suggested they look out of the window to check the weather. 

Gregson fought back the usual urge to throw something heavy at the detective’s head and just dropped his own head back against the armchair’s backrest. “Oh, of course. We walk in and ask to see the prisoner no one is allowed to see but one selected, deaf warden, by direct order of the Lord Chief Justice of London. I am sure they will open the door away.”

As per usual, all his sarcasm flew well over Sholmes’ head. “Why, that would be awfully nice of them. But alas, through my powers of deduction I have come to suspect they would not let us in. However, if the Lord Chief Justice were to ask to see the prisoner, I am certain they would open their doors to him and whoever is accompanying him. Don’t you agree, doctor?”

Gregson opened his mouth to ask him if he really thought he could talk Stronghart into letting him in, but before he could get a single word out Mikotoba laughed. “I believe, dear Inspector,” he said, “that Mr. Sholmes has a plan.”

Another insufferable grin. “That I do! But to enact it, we will need some external help…”

***

“... Nice plan, great detective.”

“I hadn’t quite planned for Mr. Stangerson to faint…”

“You pulled off a cloth to reveal the head of his missing friend!”

“A wax replica, Inspector! I would have told him right away, if he had the good grace to wait a few moments before collapsing. I would handle it with more grace if I were to see Mikotoba’s disembodied head on a table.”

Mikotoba raised an eyebrow. “Oh, would you now?”

“... How come I get the distinct feeling I am currently on very thin ice?”

“Will you two stop talking nonsense for a moment and help this man on the sofa! Why is his hair burning-- ugh, he’s heavy…”

“Oh yes! Tall and imposing! Just as we need him!” Sholmes smiled brightly as he watched Mikotoba and Gregson lean an unconscious Joseph Stangerson onto the sofa. “Mmmh. He may be slightly too much on the portly side, but that’s nothing a good girdle cannot help with.”

“What on Earth are you--”

“All in due time, Inspector. Now, it may be best for you to leave before Scotland Yard starts wondering where you’ve gone - your next shift starts shortly, as I believe you mentioned no less than sixteen times. Whatever excuse you gave for your absence can only hold up so long.”

Gregson frowned. “You haven’t told me what your great plan exactly is, Sholmes.”

Sholmes grinned, and wagged a finger at him. “All in due time! Don’t worry, go back to work and be as non-suspicious as possible. I’ll handle everything here.”

“That is precisely why I’m worried,” Gregson muttered, and rubbed his face. “Ugh. Fine, I’ll go and be back later. Whatever you’re doing, swear to me that the kid stays out of it.”

“... Miss Lestrade, or little Iris?”

“Both, for God’s sake! Both need to stay out of this!”

“Of course, of course! Now, where did I put the smelling salts?”

“I’ll get them,” Mikotoba said quickly. Last he had let Sholmes grab the smelling salts, he’d wound up grabbing something entirely different from his chemistry set. Things would have taken a drastic and permanent turn for the worst, had he not been able to immediately intervene.

Thankfully, Stangerson did not need any smelling salts. By the time Mikotoba headed back downstairs - after a quick check to make sure that both Iris and Gina were still asleep - Gregson was gone and Stangerson he was once again conscious, staring with wide eyes at the wax head as Sholmes finished explaining… well. Everything they knew thus far, really. 

Mikotoba said nothing, and sat on an armchair as Stangerson’s expression went to horror to relief, then to confusion, and slowly back to the most utter horror as the reality of Mr. Drebber’s situation sank in. Just as Sholmes finished speaking, he jumped on his feet.

“We must do something! We have to get him out of there!”

“Of course, and that is what we mean to--”

“We must go to the press!”

“We would not be believed, not without proof, not with so much at stake. And first of all, we need to be absolutely certain that our theory is sound--”

“I’ll go to the prison myself and--”

“Mr. Stangerson. I promise you, we are going to get Mr. Drebber out of there safely,” Mikotoba spoke up, and reached to put a hand on the man’s shoulder. “But if we show our hand too soon, things could go wrong. If our suspicions are correct, then Mael Stronghart can do… extreme things to keep the truth from being known.”

Stangerson looked back at him, hands still balled into fists, and suddenly he looked so lost. 

“You think… do you think he could be killed?”

“It’s… not outside the realms of possibility. Him, or any of us.”

“God.” With a groan, Joseph Stangerson fell back on the couch and ran a blistered hand through his hair. “Oh God, I should never have let him keep going out at night-- I knew it would land him in trouble-- if only--”

“This was not your fault, Mr. Stangerson,” Sholmes spoke up, and crouched in front of him. His expression was serious, his mouth a tight line. “Your friend’s choices are not your own, and you couldn’t know what would befall him. But when he went missing, you turned to us for help. That’s what matters. And we will help him.”

“He doesn’t know,” Stangerson choked out, and his gaze turned from Sholmes to Mikotoba. His eyes were wide, and full of dawning horror. “He’s all alone in there and he doesn’t know that we’re looking for him.”

“But he will soon enough. And he is alive, Mr. Stangerson. There is hope yet. But if we’re to reach him, we’re going to need your help.”

A shaky breath, then Stangerson nodded. “Anything,” he said. “I’d do anything.”

Sholmes smiled. “That’s what I hoped to hear. So, my good man, how would you feel about wearing a girdle?”

“... Huh?”

Stangerson blinked, and looked over at Mikotoba, who shrugged. “I am afraid he hasn’t divulged the details of this plan to me yet.”

“Ah, you won’t have to wait long. Just as soon as Miss Tusspells arrives - my message should have reached her a little while ago, after all.”

“Tusspells? Was it-- the lady who found him at the cemetery?”

“That’s the one! You see, you have a convincing enough body - but your face, I fear, looks nothing like that of our Lord Chief Justice, Mael Stronghart.”

“My… face?”

“Well, you see--” Sholmes began, only to trail off upon hearing a knock on the door. He grinned. “Oh, it seems Miss Tusspells has received my message. The good news is, I now will only have to spell out my plan once…”

***

“A mask.”

“Yes, that’s what I--”

“A wax mask in the likeness of the Lord Chief Justice of London.”

“I am fairly sure that is what I just said. Was it not?” Sholmes paused, frowning, and turned to Mikotoba. “My good doctor, that is what I said, correct?”

“This is ridiculous!” Esmeralda Tusspells paused her pacing, and crossed her arms. “No idiot would fall for it!”

Sholmes smiled. “I can’t see why not! Your wax sculptures are remarkably lifelike, as the bump on Mr. Stangerson’s head can prove.”

The mention of the student caused Tusspells to bite her lower lip, looking over. For all his remarkable size, the man in question looked oddly small as he looked back at her, his expression pleading. She hesitated, and when she spoke again she sounded defensive to her own ears.

“Of course my work is lifelike - it’s not that I have doubts! But a face made out of wax cannot move. Even if I can make a wearable mask out of it - which I have never done before - it would take only a good look to tell it’s completely motionless.”

“But there is a chance it might work!” Stangerson spoke up, wringing his hands. “Even if it is a small chance, we must try. An innocent man is in prison!”

“Not all that innocent, digging up corpses…”

“Well-- you were there to dig up a corpse too!”

“Touché. But I never claimed innocence.” Tusspells, sighed, and rubbed her temples before turning back to Sholmes. “... Run this by me again, monsieur. The way you envision it, the Lord Chief Justice shows up, saying nothing, never changing expression, and yet prison guards immediately take him to the prisoner without so much a direct order? Do I have to tell you how unlikely that i--”

“Bell’s palsy,” the Japanese doctor spoke up, causing her to trail off. She looked over, startled, and the man - Mikotoba, was it? - smiled. “It is a type of temporary facial paralysis caused by inflammation of the facial nerve. It usually only affects one side of the face, but it can be bilateral in rare cases. As prison guards are hardly doctors, I feel this explanation would suffice should anyone pose questions.”

“And who would answer those questions, if he cannot speak?”

Sholmes grinned. “Ah, we have an ace up our sleeve for that! A bona fide member of Scotland Yard willing to accompany the Lord Chief Justice to the visit, and speak for him. Surely, if the Lord Chief Justice arrives in prison and a respected Inspector is accompanying him, no one is going to look too closely.”

Tusspells paused for a moment. “That… does change things,” she said, and resumed pacing back and forth in front of the fireplace. “... Yes, it’s so stupid, it might actually work.”

“That it is!” The detective smiled brightly, but she paid him no mind. Her thoughts were already racing, trying to think of a way to adapt her work to make a mask - a wearable mask. 

“It won’t be easy,” she said, frowning. “I will need to make a few experiments, and choose a material to serve as the basis of the mask. It cannot rest directly on skin, clearly, as the warmth might damage the wax and make it lose its shape.”

Stangerson nodded. “I am a chemist. Perhaps I can help you find a solution - something to make the wax more resistant to body heat, at least for a time.”

Tusspells nodded. “Yes-- yes, that would be very helpful, monsieur. And of course, I will need photographs of the Lord Chief justice. Obviously an imprint of his face would make the best basis for my work, and make it far quicker, but that seems impossible to obtain.”

Sholmes smiled. “Ah, but is anything really impossible?”

“I’d wager that shoving Lord Stronghart’s face in plaster to make a cast of it without him noticing would be close enough to impossible to be an impossibility, Sholmes,” Mikotoba pointed out, gaining himself a long-suffering sigh.

“You are horribly attached to common sense, my good doctor, but I will concede this point. But certainly, mademoiselle, you’d be able to make do without a cast?”

“Oui, of course. I can create his likeness in wax without a cast, but the process will be longer.” Tusspells rubbed her chin. Stangerson looked over, wringing his hands.

“How… how much longer?”

“Perhaps a week. Perhaps two. It all depends on how quickly I can have all the material I need.”

“I’ll get you anything - what material do you need?”

“I will need photographs, as I said, from any and all angles. Portraits of him too, as accurate as possible, to get his complexion just right - seeing him briefly at night in the light of an oil lamp was far from enough. I’ll have to make a wig, too. And… let me look.” She suddenly reached out to grab Stangerson’s tie, causing him to bend forward towards her with a startled yelp. She took the glasses off his face and looked at him closely. “We’re lucky, monsieur, that your eyes are such a light blue. Even if they’re not a precise match to the Lord Chief Justice’s, they will do. And… excuse-moi, but are you aware your hair is on fire?”

“Oh. Of course, that’s… that’s good. I’ll look for any photos, he’s in the newspapers so often-- I’ll find them,” Stangerson said quickly, entirely skipping her question about the perpetually smoldering lock of hair on his head. He straightened himself, putting his glasses back on. 

“As for portraits, I believe the Inspector can help us,” Sholmes spoke up. “There is no shortage of portraits of the new Lord Chief Justice in the Yard and around the Old Bailey, and he might just be able to smuggle one out to us.”

Tusspells nodded. “That would be perfect. And, it goes without saying - if you are caught, you’re not to name me as the creator of the mask.” She crossed her arms, looking the detective in the eye. “That gallery is my family’s legacy. I am all that is left. If anything happens to me, my entire family’s claim to immortality goes with me.”

Sholmes nodded, and held her gaze with a serious expression that, she had learned by now, only graced his features when the situation was particularly serious. “You have our word, your name won’t get past our lips if this goes wrong - but I am certain you realize, Miss Tusspells, that if the worst happens… it wouldn’t take long for Lord Stronghart to connect the wax mask to you regardless. Given your work and your presence at the cemetery that night.”

That much was true; it came to no surprise to Esmeralda Tusspells. If that insane plan failed, if they were caught, getting to her would take Stronghart very little time and no effort at all. Accepting meant putting everything on the line, whether or not those men could be trusted to keep their mouths shut.

“... I know,” she heard herself saying, and Joseph Stangerson stepped forward. 

“Miss Tusspells, I beg of you--” he began, only to trail off when Sholmes lifted a hand in his direction. 

“Mr. Stangerson, the choice is hers alone.”

For a few moments, Esmeralda felt remarkably as though she was standing among her waxen creations. Everything was still; each face was turned to her. She alone could speak her mind, she alone could decide whether or not the show was over.

The man looked so young. So pale, as though he’d been bled dry.

“Monsieur, what happened?”

“H--help--”

 And then she’d seen that face again, only weeks and yet years younger, smiling at her from a newspaper as the man held up a trophy. The Professor had suddenly had a name - Enoch J Drebber - and then he was suddenly not the Professor at all. A student with a brilliant future ahead of him until an ill-fated night, in the wrong cemetery, at the wrong grave.

Could have thrown the newspaper out then and I didn’t. I came here instead. I came for help because… because…

“... I saved his life,” Esmeralda heard herself speaking at last. “He’d have suffocated there, and we’d be none the wiser, if I hadn’t dug him up. And because I dug him up, he’s buried alive again.” A brief laugh and she tiled up her chin, looking at each of the men present. “Mon Dieu, how can you look at me and say I actually have a choice on the matter? There is only one choice.”

Mikotoba smiled. “There is another choice. The easier one. But you are a good person.”

A scoff. “Hah, hardly. Once this is all over and you’ve gained yourselves national popularity, I demand you all let me take casts of your faces for my museum.”

The request gained her a delighted grin from Sholmes. “Happily! I must say, I did wonder how come my visage was not in your museum just yet. Never too late, is it! I will happily let you take the cast of my face right awa--”

“Right after this case is closed,” Mikotoba cut him off and, to her utter relief, the detective stopped talking.

For a time.

***

When Gina sneaked downstairs, no one stirred. 

She was very quiet, of course, that came with her occupation, but she could hear someone - either Sholmes or Meek Toby - snoring really loudly behind the door of the room where they had retired to sleep, so she was pretty sure they wouldn’t have heard her of she stomped down the stairs. 

Meek Toby had been really nice after she had woken up again from her nap. He’d got her more food, and told her she could have the room all for herself; he’d share the room with Mr. Sholmes, he’d told her, until the matter with Scotland Yard was resolved and she could go her way without fear. He’d even offered to take baby Iris in the room with them too, but Gina had told him she didn’t mind. She was cute and well, if she started crying, she’d probably hear her no matter what part of the house she was in. That, and she wasn’t used to sleeping on her own. There were always other kids with her whenever she went to sleep, for as long as she could remember. An empty room just for her seemed… daunting. 

The stairs creaked a little, but not too much. She made her way quietly enough to the front door, slid the deadbolt open, tried the handle, and… the door opened.

Gina Lestrade stood there a few moments, bewildered, feeling the night air on her face and staring at the fog that blanketed the street. She had fully expected the door to be locked with a key too, she had been so sure it had to be - of course they would try to lock her in, it was all grownups did, they could not be trusted. She’d already decided that if the door didn’t open, she’d try climbing out of the window. But the door did open; they hadn't locked her in, and Gina found she didn’t know how to deal with that. Finally, she slowly closed the door, pulled the deadbolt, and sneaked back in bed - confused, and relieved, and confused at her own relief.

I can keep her safe, the copper had said, and maybe he’d meant it. Maybe they all meant it.

Maybe, she thought, some grownups could be trusted after all.

***

Mael Stronghart’s plan, as far as the dispatch of Seishiro Gigoku and  Genshin Asogi from the country was concerned, had been flawless.

As their ship left for its first stop in Calais, it did so well ahead of the newspapers’ evening editions printing the story of the Professor’s survival due to a botched execution - something which may have roused a misplaced sense of guilt in one man, and too many questions in the other. The latter was the greatest concern, and Stronghart would rather not have Asogi return to England out of a misplaced sense of honor to find out what happened, and who the man languishing in prison in his stead was.

The ship left Calais perfectly on time, to farther shores, before news could spread to France in any form. Always ahead of any newspapers which may be dispatched internationally - that was, as long as the ship kept to schedule. And it didn’t. 

Much later, some would describe it as fate. At the time, it seemed an inconvenience of little consequence: a defective boiler which forced the steamship to stay in the Port of Gibraltar nearly two days more than planned, for repairs. It caused some grumbling among the passengers already on board, but it was welcomed by others who would otherwise have had to wait for the next passing ship. 

On the afternoon of the steamship’s delayed departure from Gibraltar, no fewer than nineteen extra passengers boarded - most of them British nationals. And one of them had, among his belongings, the copy of a London newspaper from the previous week, delivered to him that very same morning. While the news on it was not all that new in Great Britain, it certainly was news to the British Overseas Territory of Gibraltar - and stunning news, too.

Professor’s death sentence commuted to life imprisonment after execution is botched.

#dai gyakuten saiban #the great ace attorney #herlock sholmes #yujin mikotoba #gina lestrade #tobias gregson #esmeralda tusspells #enoch drebber #case of identity

[sanstropfremir]

I'm really enjoying reading through your blog, and of course it has to do a lot with the fact that I also love to bits everything Taemin puts out. Unfortunately tumblr makes it really annoying to try and get to older posts, so sorry if you've already spoken about any of this T-T

A big part of why I love Taemin's solo work so much is his unique style, which shines through both technique and performance.

Taemin has many times spoke about how he's heavily involved in everything concerning his work: styling, picking out the samples, lyrics, themes, choreo, you name it he took care of it at some point. "The taemin genre" couldn't have emerged simply out of him being an above average dancer, his signature is on everything.

But surely, very often he can't do much more than express his opinion on something, and a lot of the end product is still created by other people? It would be silly to expect him to dance, sing, produce, write lyrics, style all at once, right? Or would it?

I very, very often hear people take pride in the fact that their fav is an "all-rounder", that presumably does most of the "creating" purely by themselves, or at least can shine all alone, even without the support of a group. But does that imply that artists that only do the performing part are somehow less "authentic", or worthy of praise? Or that idols comfortable in their position as a team player aren't talented or into what they do? To call yourself a master you probably have to spend a decade on just one skill, so why expect teens and young adults to be Da Vincis?

Now, of course it's still amazing when an idol puts in the work and branches out. Taemin's vocal improvement undoubtedly gave him more creative opportunities and made his stages that much more impactful.

But even just being an idol and maintaining an attractive appearance (for criteria as harsh as it is in k-pop) would easily count as a full-time job, so I would go as far as to say that this expectation of total creative control is a little delusional.

haha it was really funny watching you go through everything! yea tumblr is really bad about that, but if you go to my blog on desktop/not the mobile version you should be able to page back through ALL my asks, which are all tagged by 'answers'. there are like probably around a thousand of those now tho.

i have kind of talked about this before, but i'm very happy to talk about it again, because i always think it's worthwhile to clarify what the actual process is like for creating a collaborative work.

you are right, taemin and every other idol who says they're 'involved' in the process in some way is most likely just picking options and expression opinions about things that designers and stylists have already curated for them. it is physically impossible for a single person to do EVERYTHING involved in something like creating a kpop cb, because there are just too many tasks. and if one person DID try to do it all on their own, it would take probably 100x as long to finish. let me use styling as an example: lots of idols have professed to have input on styling choices, but this can range anywhere from bringing in moodboards and having discussions about what styling they're interested in at design meetings, to just picking which thing they like best from a selection of clothes already provided by the designer. in NO fucking world is an idol:

taking measurements

shopping for fabric

shopping for clothing

sewing and altering clothing

doing the budgeting

labelling and collating all the pieces together

taking fitting notes

these are all extremely specialized skills that 1) take TIME to learn how to do and how to do well, and 2) just take TIME to DO. you want to know what i spend probably 40% of the total production time of a show doing when i costume design? fucking SHOPPING. an idol may contribute ideas to a design and make executive choices, but in NO way are they solely responsible for everything about styling. the only idol that i would believe to have a heavier hand than most in this regard is kibum, who does actually have a good knowledge of fashion and fabric and i could see him going shopping with a designer. but if you think that man is sewing anything? cmon.

and this is just for ONE aspect of a cb. you think an idol is also painting the set? shopping for props? setting up the lighting? most idols that are known for dancing aren't even choreographing their own work, INCLUDING taemin. it is absolutely and unquestionably delusional to say that an idol has total creative control over something. this whole idea doesn't originate in kpop (it's auteur theory's fault), but kpop does suffer from an acute version of it, because there's a general collective concensus that devalues the creative work of the labourer. basically, people will only classify you as a "true artist" if you're the one who comes up with the ideas, because ideas and concepts are given more importance and weight. it's a type of because 'being in charge'/'at the top of the food chain that's been perpetuated by capitalism and western postmordern art theory that intentionally places value of conceptual skills higher than those of craftspeople. no type of person is a ''true artist'' and most art takes many people with many different skills in order to create. i find it unintentionally very funny that you use da vinci as an example of an 'allrounder' (or 'renaissance man' as they used to be called) because he, like every other famous painter from the era, used apprentices to help paint his paintings!!!!! he was even an apprentice himself for verrocchio!! da vinci's legacy would not have been possible without all the other people who helped him create the work that he did!

what is the real kicker about this whole mess is that downplays the beauty of the fact that art is made collaboratively. an 'ideas' person cannot realize those ideas without a craftsperson there to help them. everyone who takes part in creating something is important, and it's fucked to only acknowledge specific people in that process.

#like i dont think people realize that even like big contemporary artists have studios w ppl doing fabrication for them #that's VERY common #but none of them will actively recognize it because it takes the perceived value of their monolith artist brand away #i've almost never done a full sweep design on anything and i've worked on some tiny ass shows bc its just too much work #like when i say its impossible i fucking mean it #kpop questions #im not going to get into more of an anticapitalist rant than i already did but its literally capitalism's fault #craftspeople were literally some of the first unions btw #text #answers #like it's very fine that someone just does performing. thats ok. performing is its own set of skills #you dont have to expect or gas up idols for doing other stuff like there are literally other people whose jobs those are!!!!!!!!!!!! #auteur theory and capitalism ruined fucking everything fr #dont even get me started on the authenticity stuff again god knows i hate that shit

[julia-bunncat]

Bunbun!! Welcome back! I’ve miss you! 🥰 I recently went through your blog and I’m curious about your new Shinsai AU~ I’d love to here about it when you have the time. ✨👀✨ Also, I hope you have a lovely day! 💖

Awww, thank you so much for the question and such sweet words, Leeann ^^ I missed too! 🥰 And actually, ahah… During the time I was away, not one or two Shinsai-oriented AUs were added in my collection 😅 Moreover, each one of them contains some monstrosity of Shuichi or Korekiyo, so I wasn’t sure you'd like it… But since you are interested, I will try to tell you at least about one! (and I even have a sketch made by my bestie! 🤗💗) Especially since, due to the recently released V3 merch for Halloween it seems very appropriate 😂🎃

yeah I mean it :>

Let's call it "Spiritual Marriage to a Fox" ~

Often the ideas for my AUs are generated under the inspiration of arts. This was no exception, but since I can not attach here foreign art without permission (and get this permission too) – I just describe it. In this image, Korekiyo, wearing Japanese traditional clothes, with black fox ears and tail, is sitting behind bars, tied with a red rope. Instead of the usual mask, the lower half of his face is covered by a thin white cloth (like a veil for eastern dances) with the inscription «Truth» on it. And Kiyo’s look is rather sad, even sympathetic... So, yeah, situation «kitsune! Shinguji is imprisoned» becomes the starting point ✨

Shuichi, in turn, took on the role of junior priest of the Saihara family. The cunning fox is imprisoned exactly where he serves. Moreover, Shuichi knows that his senior mentors are about to torture Kiyo through various rituals – and he must take part in it... But he had doubts. His uncle taught him that it's always possible to negotiate with the otherwordly forces, and that extreme measures should be taken only if the Yokai are seriously dangerous. So he decided to risk. Just look at the kitsune first... Then let him out. And if anything went wrong he was even willing to give the beast his tiny life – to let him drink his blood so he wouldn’t hurt others...

But he didn’t know... that just by stepping into the dungeon he was dooming himself to a completely different fate, where his selfless and sincere desire to understand another being would not justify.

It sounds frightening, but actually everything is even funny in its own way (if you look at it from the outside, not from Shuichi’s point of view) :D In this universe Korekiyo is not a standard kitsune, but a whole deity Kūko, which, in fact, allowed itself to be imprisoned (Just because after 1000+ years of life, these creatures begin to be more interested in people and lead a similar lifestyle. Specifically Korekiyo wanted to understand the nature of human fear, anger, despair and superstition, so he pretended to be a standard kitsune xD). He has great power, is able to foresee the future and freely manipulate human consciousness... But hardly uses it, especially when he’s forgotten for a long time and only 💕Shui💕chi💕 offers a helping hand.

So... Yeah :'0 He instantly falls in love with Saihara ~ Moreover, Kiyo is sure that it's decided by fate! That Shuichi is the man with whom he is destined to enter into an eternal strong marriage!! First and only 🥰 :D

One small conversation between them – and Kiyo, believing in the vision he has, in fact, takes advantage of Shuichi’s good intentions. Under the pretext of being grateful for his release, he offers Shuichi to enter into some kind of "partnership": Kiyo gets a person through whom he can continue to explore the human world; and Shuichi gets all sorts of benefits: protection, deliverance from misfortunes + senior mentors will not judge him for yokai's salvation.

“From now on, your life will change... but only for the better.”

And the truth is, the priest had no choice. He didn’t know where to run. Didn't know how to convince his fellow-novices that the yokai he had released was not dangerous to humans. But most of all, he didn't want to be alone, as he had always been...

“I am Shuichi, the eldest son of the Saihara family, junior priest and probably the most naive man who still walks the earth. Because, um... I think, I agree with your offer.”

But OF COURSE, Kiyo didn't specify to him that his offer is actually a marriage proposal ;)))

This sketch illustrates how it will happen...

Yes. Yes. Shuichi will be tricked into marrying a supernatural powerful being! And he’ll be angry. He'll be broken. But Korekiyo never lied for a second about the terms of this complicated marriage. He tied himself to Shuichi with his own hands (or lips if you wish xD) to be eternally devoted to him from now on!! 😍

And though this plot is full of questionable, even forcing moments… As you may have noticed, there is again a mythology where everything has its own specific laws that paradoxically work 😅 In fact, this is kind of a branch of my main yokai! AU, but without emphasis on modernity. I like to experiment with the OTP's conditions; to speculate how hard the background will prevent the emergence of their love... So hope you and others will find it at least curious :^ (and I’m always ready to clarify something or add details)

#danganronpa #drv3 #shinsai #shuichi saihara #korekiyo shinguji #AU or more like a concept #not my art #kitsune kiyo #yokais again :D

[cherienymphe]

Hi, I am the anon who sent you this fic. I read fics all time for the last few years. And I hate this feeling of deja vu, because I don’t know if I am going mental or in fact I read this before. Some ppl rewrite their fics which is totally fine and it explain the feeling that I read this before. However in the last few months or weeks I have noticed that a lot of blogs find fics which idea is sooo similar to their own. It happened before of course, but somehow I see this more often know - maybe it is because ppl started to speak up? Anyway, I understand what you are saying about not owing dark Rafe trop (however your Rafe in every fic is different and I read a lot dark Rafe fics and all of them were original), however it was really bold of this person to write such similar fic not too long after you added yours. If this fic would be similar to the older ones I would be able to agree that maybe she read it and forgot or something. But it was sooo recent…

Anyway, if I find something else I will probably let you know (of course if you want), but keeep you work flowing we really appreciate it!! And ignore the trolls, I see that they have too much on their hands that they keep coming back and bother you about all the things… 😡

Take care 💖

Lol thank you! Yeah considering I only posted my fic a few months ago and then they post something that's scarily similar is 🥴 if that's how they want to be known that's on them. Thank you btw! At least I'm aware of their blog and took the measures to revoke their access to mine

#asks

[hbthrowaway]

Hydrabones + Deathpoker / Chimericade

EDIT: As the original callout, this first draft was constructed in a way meant to be as neutrally approached as possible. In it are offered possible explanations and rationale, as well as errors on Anon/A's part. The one after this was written with far less patience and in a much shorter manner.

ORIGINAL POST:

I am going to attempt post this in an objective way, in an effort to not obfuscate events or put my bias into this. This is meant to be informative and for the reader to draw their own conclusions.

I hope you will understand why names in this are anonymized, and should the people it is about read this, the anonymous person hopes anonymity is respected. They do not feel this is an unreasonable request due to the events described. This person does not want to be known or talked about, they do not want people to think of these events as associated with them. Lastly, if outside parties are able to identify the anonymous person through context, a keen eye, or other methods, please do not disclose who they are.

As a result, this is also being posted on an anonymous account, associated with nobody. It will not be checked once this post is up. There will be no arguing or responses from this account. This post will be archived online as a safety measure.

This post primarily is about @/Hydrabones (dA, TH, twitter, etc) and secondarily about Tumblr user @/chimericade AKA @/deathpoker AKA @/wildeornes, whose username on Toyhouse was mindbite but is now SALIERI. Nell also used to be @/iwannapushyourdaisies. Hydrabones in particular has a habit of rebranding often.

This will be documenting a cycle of abuse and control Hydrabones/Icarus has engaged in for years, which can largely be exemplified in this screenshot:

Please be advised, this is an extremely long post. It is organized as chronologically as possible.

To be absolutely clear, only one report on these incidents has ever been filed online. However it resolves will be up to the moderators of that site, and their decision will be respected. The majority of these events took place before the website existed, and does not involve any content on that website. Due to the nature of what this contains, I would like to content warn for the following that will either be implied or implicit within this post:

grooming

shotacon

sexual assault

abuse

noncon/dubcon

erotic gore (eroguro)

human trafficking*

TERF adjacent ideology*

(*note: it is not believed that Icarus is truly a TERF or a trafficker by raw definition. Please do not take comparisons to mean as such.)

These content warnings are not meant as anything more than a precautionary measure; it is conclusions that have been drawn in private with concerned parties. Should you not agree with those conclusions, that is your decision.

The party that was hurt by these events will simply be called "Person A." The other parties will be referred to by their online names, "Icarus" and "Nell." Nell has also gone by "Hike" and "Hiaka" in the past. Legal names will come up but will, without question, be completely and entirely censored. Person A has asked to be referred to by they/them, and all parties have had pronouns change throughout the years. Icarus has changed names and usernames many times over this time period, with their most recent ones having been Reidoo, Icarusis, Planetsrings, and Hydrabones. Should you put any of these in as deviantArt usernames, they all will redirect you to Hydrabones.

In addition to these, older usernames included Xrie, Arkyjohn, Arkyoni, Dingohugs, Nezizzle, Zuruzukin, Clockworkinside, Reidobiwa, Shadowbeast, Kabutops, and Uranus, among others that were not recalled or relevant. Aside from xrie, these were all usernames they had on Tumblr. The blog(s) associated with these have been summarily deactivated, and the new owners of "Kabutops" and "Uranus" or any of the others are unrelated parties.

If a first name is left uncensored, it is safe to assume that it is either Hydrabones, or an OC (This will be generally easy to determine and differentiate via context when viewing screenshots and logs linked here as evidence.)

Person A wanted to handle this as privately as they could. However, after an extremely rapid decline in their health, they feel they can't be silent any longer about what they've experienced.

Please note:

Person A has persistent amnesia regarding the events between 2011 and 2021, much of what is recalled here was done through seeking out conversations, photos, or vent posts they had at the time.

It is noteworthy in the interest of presenting these events objectively that this has not been diagnosed yet, though Person A plans to see a neurologist in the very near future. Much of the below had to be learned by looking through their own archives. It was not just bad memories that were lost, many good ones were absent as well. What has been definitely diagnosed is the following: c-PTSD, OCD, depression, anxiety. Person A's OCD manifests mainly as moral scrupulousity, which intensified as the circumstances became impossibly complex.

Person A, being autistic, has an interest in preserving media and memories. This ranges from old documents, old files, old photos, archives, so on and so forth. As a result, evidence of these events stretches all the way back to 2011, starting here on Tumblr. It spanned conversational programs such as Skype and Discord, and eventually moved into real life and physical interaction. There is less evidence for real life incidents due to the nature of it, as well as Person A being largely restricted from venting about these events for reasons and in ways that will be detailed in this post.

For background context: Person A is a domestic abuse survivor, being the victim of their terminally ill mother. Their primary support before meeting Icarus was their father, who spent those years caring for her at the end of her life. It is additionally worth noting that in coercing Person A to move to Australia, Icarus effectively removed Person A from their own support system and strongest familial bond. Regardless of intent, this was indicative of a severe worsening of the patterns of victim isolation that will be detailed below.

Person A was born in October of 1996 and is a permanent resident of the United States. In July of 2011, they were 14 years old, a similar age to Icarus's younger sister. Icarus, on the other hand, was born in March of 1993, a permanent resident of Australia. It is noted that in most or all of Icarus's social media profiles that their age is entirely redacted or not present, instead listed vaguely as "adult." Icarus was 18 years old in July of 2011. They will be turning 30 in 2023. Here is reference to Icarus's age, since it is not listed on their public profiles. [link]

On July 3rd, 2011, Icarus asked out Person A, to which Person A was receptive. At the age of 18, Icarus entered a romantic relationship with Person A, age 14. [link]

The reason they began dating was due to RP shipping between Pokemon characters, named Kyran "Ky" Garret and P[redacting entire name]. This began on an Oekaki board that contained a Pokemon RP system run by users. Person A and Icarus joked about them copying their OCs by dating. [link]

These characters were regularly in sexual scenarios both OOC and on IC roleplay blogs. More than once, Person A had explicit pornography submitted to them, while Icarus drew the characters engaging in sexual acts. [link 1] [link 2]

Aside from Icarus, all of Person A's past and present online friends have since acknowledged that this was not okay behavior to encourage. However, Person A also recognizes that the culture of the internet was different 10-12 years ago, with edgy and offensive humor along with extremely inappropriate behavior from adults. While this is NOT a minimization of the harm done or dangers of these behaviors and the things they normalized, it is an unfortunate reality that can be best exemplified in the sheer number of stories like this one of varying severities, comparable or otherwise.

While this should not have happened, the culture of Tumblr used to be one where far more was allowed to slide. There were "body positivity" events where both Person A and Icarus posted suggestive images of themselves, encouraged by the people they were around. Comments about "lolicon/shotacon" and sexual behavior towards minors was egregiously common. That being said, Icarus was alerted to this age difference being a problem on the very first day they got together, and again later on. Because Icarus has deleted their blog, all that remains are responses from Person A's blog. Please note, this was from a time before Tumblr asks could be reblogged. Person A responded by taking offense to what had been said. [link]

Here are excerpts of extremely sexual behavior from Icarus, from Person A's blog, in which the format has unfortunately broken over the years. Red highlighted will denote what Icarus has said, while blue will be Person A.

[link 1*] [link 2] [link 3]

*Boku no Pico is a shotacon hentai. It depicts graphic sex with characters who are explicitly children. One could, and should, consider it animated pornographic depictions of children and treat it will all the severity that entails -- regardless of whether or not it was an edgy 'meme' in some circles due to the shock value of such revolting media.

These interactions met their logical end in Person A creating disturbing scenarios to discuss with Icarus while underage and for Person A to relate the above content to themself.

CW: Incestuous content, underage fictional characters, shotacon. [link 1] [link 2]

In November of 2011, Icarus called Person A (now 15 years old) their fiance. It was not the first time marriage was referred to, and it was not the last. [link]

Though Icarus has identified as asexual for a long time, it does not erase what happened. Whether or not Icarus still identifies as asexual is unknown to the party writing this or to Person A. When being informed of certain events, Nell allegedly rejected that Icarus could ever be predatory due to an apparent fear or repulsion to sex. Icarus has shown an apparent disregard for legality in the past, and despite Person A knowing it was wrong, the barriers had already been broken down. [link]

With the culture of Tumblr changing rapidly between 2011 and 2012, Icarus eventually stopped making suggestive or inappropriate comments in public. Person A has no way to access old Skype logs where there may have been more.

In addition, in 2012, Icarus attempted to meet with Person A in Las Vegas on their trip to the USA. They never managed to meet up due to poor connection. Person A was 15 years old. [link]

Regardless of sexual identity, Icarus had been making constant sexual comments up until this event.

Just a year later, a Tumblr user they both knew "J****-****" was caught in possession of CSEM, some of which belonged to Person A. Person A had been coerced into sharing nude pictures with this user. This Tumblr user was at or around Icarus's age when she was caught with it and called out. No action on their relationship was taken.

CW: Sexual abuse, mention of CSEM. [link]

This would not be the only adult to sexually take advantage of Person A as a result of continually justifying dating Icarus. Person A's mental health suffered from what had happened. They were institutionalized and then sexually abused once more while in the hospital.

In 2014, after Josh Macedo (confusedtree) was called out for sexting underage girls, Person A realized that the same had been happening to them again. The user was a friend of both them and Icarus, named "K***." K*** was at least the same age as Icarus. Once again, Icarus did not act on the problematic nature of their relationship.

CW: Sexual abuse, minor/adult sexual relationship. [link]

In 2014, Icarus got Person A into adoptables. Person A joined Toyhouse in October of 2014, just after they had turned 18 and were now, in the eyes of the law, an "adult." Due to parental abuse and neglect, Person A now feels that they were not at the maturity consistent with an adult, continuing to justify their relationship both to themself and to others. Person A had dropped out of school, was developmentally delayed, could not cook, could hardly clean, and could not drive. They spent most of their days holed up in their bedroom hiding, but managed to get their GED during 2015.

By that point, Icarus and Person A had been together for four years. Icarus had, in this period, been presented with more than enough evidence of wrongdoing, external perspective, criticism, and pressure to be well aware that their relationship was inappropriate. There is no 'I didn't know better' excuse that can be made when the inappropriate relationship endured 4 years of consistent questioning, as well as numerous breakups and opportunities to do the right thing and break things off permanently.

Person A did not see any red flags despite having a large amount unaddressed of anxiety about it, which they attribute to romantic relationships with adults having been normalized in their life. Icarus was fully aware of Person A's neglect and lack of life skills.

They officially met in person in late 2015. Person A travelled (without Icarus's help, for transparency) to Australia to visit. [link]

Person A had their 19th birthday over there, and Icarus's mother seemed uncomfortable to let them sleep in the same bed, instead having Person A sleep in their younger brother's bed while he was away. Inevitably, they would go to Icarus's bedroom regardless. The conversation about moving over there permanently was becoming very serious, and Person A moved to Australia to go to University with Icarus in early 2016. The following are events that took place in real life and, as such, have limited amounts of evidence.

Person A holds no animosity towards Icarus's family members. They are thankful to them for making their situation more bearable.

Moving over there ended up becoming a sunk-cost scenario in Person A's eyes. Even when they started to see problems with their living situation, they felt an immense amount of guilt over the idea of quitting their education partway through. Person A's father was the one putting them through school and they wanted to do right by that due to the amount of money it would end up costing. Additionally, Person A regarded Icarus as having "saved their life" due to getting them out of a household where their mother was actively threatening and abusing them. They felt indebted to Icarus and dependency would keep them tethered for four years. Considering it wrong to leave, Person A would fall into a deep depression, trapped in what they considered a hell of their own making. Person A continually would blame themself for this, even now.

For the next several paragraphs, please be cautioned that there is sexual assault discussed.

Just three months later, in May of 2016, Icarus's real life friend Tora invited them both over to play an online FPS shooter together. The trio had been flirting with the idea of a polyamorous relationship for a few weeks. Tora and Icarus were school friends, self-described by Icarus as having known each other for eleven years. They were around the same age, both at roughly 23 years old at the time. Due to not knowing when Tora's birthday was, there is no way to accurately know her exact age. Alcohol was brought out, which Person A had never interacted with before. Person A was on medication that increased the effects of the alcohol.

During the night, Icarus left the room for a significant amount of time. Tora and Person A were on the bed, and Person A was sexually assaulted. They were visibly confused and upset when Icarus entered the room, prompting them both to call Icarus's mother and request she come get them. Tora got upset and threw some keyrings, which Person A does not recall.

In June, Person A went to the police to make a statement after being advised by multiple parties. This had been advised by a psychiatrist quite a distance away, and a local therapist that Icarus brought them to. Person A was deemed unwell enough to be institutionalized, expressing delusional behavior about "infestations" and "fornication." They refused to be institutionalized, and Icarus verbally argued with the psychiatrist, having sat in the room with them to offer support. Person A does not recall the therapy session and did not go back. The report can be found below, in addition to a conversation Icarus had with someone else about the incident.

CW: Sexual assault, transmisogyny: [link]

Much has been redacted due to the graphic nature, as well as legal names. Tora identified as a trans woman at the time, but was not out, and as such was referred to with differing pronouns. Whether or not she still identifies is again, unknown, to Person A.

It has been brought to their attention that Icarus has claimed that the assault happened to them.

As you can see from signed testimony above, this was not the case. Icarus felt guilty for having left the room, an understandable reaction. There were 4 pages of testimony total but I do not believe sharing the sensitive details of the sexual assault will aid anyone.

It is not known why Icarus talked about being a lesbian when they were in a relationship with Person A at the time of the assault, who at no point in real life interactions identified as a woman.

This incident was referred to online by Icarus. [link]

This ends the section on the sexual assault. This was the 4th time since meeting Icarus that Person A had been taken advantage of by someone far older than them. Three of the people who had taken advantage of Person A were people Icarus had known.

Around this time in mid to late 2016, Person A joined a dA RP group. Icarus followed Person A to the group with the intention to be in the same sub-group, but by miscommunication, they ended up in separate sub-groups (existing for the purpose of scheduling and storytelling.) The new group noticed Icarus's behavior and came to their own conclusions about them independently of Person A, while Person A finally met people who did not already know Icarus. These people became friends who later reached out to Person A to support them.

During this, Person A was stuck mediating adoptable drama for four 'bigger' adopt artists and Icarus. Afterwards, neither of the two arguing groups were friends, and Icarus was friends with none of them. This put Person A in an awkward spot, wanting to remain friends with these people. Icarus was disapproving of continuing to speak to any of them, leading Person A to largely withdraw. The artists involved are not named here out of respect for their privacy; if they wish to come forward that is up to them.

Person A would turn to online friends for help, opening the gate to venting in private about their increasingly stressful living situation. When they were caught venting, they were immediately confronted and punished. Icarus cast immense doubt on Person A for speaking to one of the aforementioned artists they had argued with.[link]

Blaming Person A for "turning people against them" or "taking their friends away" was routine for Icarus. Over time, this became the tone Icarus took whenever any information painted them in an unflattering light, and this further isolated Person A and disallowed them the space to safely process their feelings. When Person A asked others if they were in any way negatively or unfairly influencing their perception of Icarus, they were universally assured this was not the case. [link]

Regardless of reassurances, Person A still internalized it and struggled to morally justify why they needed to externalize their feelings. This has resulted in Person A feeling immense guilt even discussing that something happened to them at all, and they still struggle to hold others accountable for wrongs against them, immediately pivoting toward the guilt and fear instilled in them. Person A routinely attempts to justify Icarus's mistreatment of them, and often minimizes and even actively denies their own emotions, believing that any upset on their end is their fault, and that they must apologize for being upset in the first place. This trauma response often triggers severe panic attacks in Person A, who struggles with having been conditioned by these behaviors to take fault for the things others do to them.

In February 2017, Person A took a break from dating Icarus. Icarus did not respond well to being in a 'relationship limbo' or to the subsequent decision made to call it off. The following messages directly led to Person A attempting suicide by leaving the house and overdosing. This has had permanent effects on their health. [link]

Icarus texted Person A while they were outside overdosing. Person A responded angrily. [link]

An online friend of Person A could see that something was wrong and encouraged them to return home.

This kind person's intervention saved Person A's life.

They blacked out and woke up in the hospital. Icarus had posted to social media that Person A was in the ER without Person A's knowledge or consent. Icarus would later joke about their erratic behavior from during their unconsciousness, citing it as "coping." Person A wrote down what they could remember directly following the suicide attempt.

CW: Suicide [link]

Despite this suicide attempt, Icarus was continually unhelpful when Person A expressed feeling suicidal afterwards. These attacks would normally happen at night. Icarus brushed them off consistently, going back to sleep. When Icarus did not brush Person A off, comfort was conflated being hurt.

[link 1] [link 2]

At the same time in 2017, the decision was made to take in a cat that had lost its home from tragic circumstances next door. Person A found that the cat was pregnant, and it had four kittens. Both Person A and Icarus attempted to not get attached to these kittens and failed, adding to the general level of stress. Icarus said they did not want to be "the bad guy," a sentiment that would get repeated. Icarus would also bring up their break-up and plans they had for the future, despite the irrelevancy to the kitten situation.

[link 1] [link 2]

There was a significant amount of strain in the household between Icarus's mother and Icarus/Person A. Person A was not allowed to vent about this despite Icarus having vented about Person A's mother. The arguments and fighting led to a desire to leave. In addition, there was a domestic incident of no one's fault that scared everyone in the household.

Icarus did not assist with apartment searching, or signing application forms, or handing them in despite Person A not having a vehicle. Icarus also actively discouraged Person A from leaving, despite having started an online fundraiser through Tumblr with the intent to leave. Person A ended up finding accommodations that worked for them alone, but still Person A was given reason after reason to not leave.

[link 1] [link 2] [link 3] [link 4*]

*This has already been linked, but now has additional context.

During this time, Person A had started a long distance relationship with someone who lived back in the United States. Icarus repeatedly hinted that they wanted to be in a polyamorous relationship and began to bring up having sex more. Eventually, Person A relented and they got back together. Person A found the timing odd since they were still in the process of leaving.

[link 1] [link 2]

Person A moved out on their own to the discontent of Icarus, who was hurt and betrayed by the decision. Once Person A had moved into their new home, Icarus brought up sex again. Person A did not feel attracted to Icarus in this way, and Icarus's response to that was to ask, "Do you love me?" This was the deal breaker for their relationship.

Icarus's asexuality had been consistent until this point. Icarus immediately began to identify as a lesbian following the break-up and retroactively called themself one for times when they dated Person A. Person A is transmasculine, and does not identify as a woman now or ever.

In late 2017 to early 2018, Person A returned to the US for the holidays. While in the US, Icarus illegally opened Person A's mail and became upset that they had received compensation for the sexual assault but Icarus hadn't. Icarus would later get compensation. Having been stressed both about this and about being left on read in their private server, Person A quietly left the server to opt for DMs temporarily. Icarus responded by deleting the entire server. This server was where screencaps in which Icarus's name in red originated from. A lot of arguments and toxic behavior were lost with the deletion.

Come 2018, Icarus invited Person A to a DND group they were running, where Person A met their partner, Nell, and another person (a minor at the time) that would later be harmed by Icarus's actions. This would fall out very messily, with Icarus pitting everyone against that person. During the ensuing arguments, Icarus lied to make the minor look worse by claiming he was "stalking" and "keeping tabs on" Person A and their partner, crafting a narrative of obsession. Shortly after, Person A would move back in to Icarus's home. When Person A tried to move on and join another DND campaign, they were told they were causing hurt for themself and others. [link]

Despite having permission to share messages of the above DND fallout, they will be used sparingly. This post is not here to tell that person's story on his behalf, but Person A has reconciled with and fully supports him after having seen the similarities in Icarus's messages. That being said, Icarus denied the possibility that this minor was preyed upon by the adults in that DND group and refused to see evidence of it. This person was publicly smeared in a twitter thread for attempting to speak up about it. [link]

This manipulation, as well as its use to separate victims and prevent them from comparing the stories they have to tell, created years of conflict that was deeply traumatic for the involved parties, including convincing both sides that they were effectively stalking one another.

Due to the persistent nature of this trauma and how it endured up until very recently, this document will break from the established chronological order briefly to further describe it here so as to immediately follow the above mention of DND Fallout to ensure proper context when describing the social manipulation that was at play.

It is worth nothing that, despite Icarus and Nell's fervent denials of any wrongdoing by any parties other than the above unnamed individual and victim, Person A has since reconciled with said victim. They came to an understanding that regardless of intent, Person A's partner had harmed the above party as well as acted in ways that facilitated the abuse they were under from Nell and Icarus.

Person A's partner admitted their fault in this, and in doing so became aware of the wider scope of the manipulations of both Icarus and Nell.

Conversely, Nell still expresses fervent belief that the above mentioned victim is a liar. This is in line with Nell siding with Icarus, as well as the kind of NSFW content Nell exposed that minor to in and outside of DND. I would advise against viewing more recent web archives of the blog mentioned due to explicit gore; in the web archive link most of the images have since broken. The images are not broken in more recent ones.

CW: Eroguro, dubcon RP, both with a minor: [link 1] [link 2] [link 3]

When Person A namedropped Icarus for the first time in November of 2022, Nell sent these messages to Person A's partner. [link]

Nell was never willing to hear out Person A's anxieties that had been reawakened when Icarus got together with them. In the end, they prioritized their own "comfort" and "healing" over people they had once been friends with. [link]

This pattern of apologism for the abuses of their partner, as well as willingness to overlook behaviors of other parties that even they themselves have admitted were inappropriate and harmful makes it clear that self-preservation is a greater driving force than doing right by victims, and lead to severe falling outs that will be detailed below.

This document will now return to its format of chronological order.

Between 2018 and 2020, Person A was still not allowed to vent privately. Asking for advice had been and was still considered venting privately. They still tried to, attempting to hide it from Icarus, going so far as to link their private Twitter to a tool that would automatically delete tweets past a certain age. Person A, Icarus, and Icarus's sister were able to move into an apartment with the support of Icarus's parents. Person A had hoped that it had been environmental factors that had brought them so low but this did not alleviate any of the stress. Person A felt responsible for trying and failing to fairly divide household tasks, with general cleaning and reminding Icarus of their tasks becoming part of that responsibility.

Nell and Icarus got together during this time period. Person A's behavior became erratic as they struggled to warn Nell about what they had experienced without drawing Icarus's attention. Nell went to Icarus anyways. Person A was hurt and confused, pushing Nell away and eventually cutting them off. Person A would end up suicidal again, walking to the hospital down the road more than once and being treated coldly by Icarus for seeking that help. What was being "brought to the table" every few months was Person A unable to handle the toxic living environment in addition to having been groomed the way they had. [link]

It is worth noting in the compiler of this document and its documentation's eyes that Nell doesn't at any point deny the wrongdoing perpetuated by their partner, rather minimizing it through statements of character clearly undermined by their own bias (and clearly at odds with the evidence provided throughout this post), and offers the excuse that it was "long ago" and "over". Beyond the dismissal of the ongoing severe trauma that has had severe repercussions throughout Person A's life and haunts them to this date, this also shows an alarming disregard for the sheer morality of what was done.

The compiler of this document asks the reader to consider if they would be able to trust a partner if they learned their partner perpetuated the abuses described here, and that said partner had grossly misrepresented these facts to all parties involved, including the reader themself.

This hypothetical, hopefully, exemplifies why this excusal of Icarus' behavior is more than just 'choosing a side', and informs someone of Nell's character, especially in the context of their own abuses.

The final argument that Icarus and Person A had was in late 2020. Tweets from Person A's personal accidentally leaked through the reply function. They had been venting that they were afraid of Icarus becoming a vtuber because they were already planning to try to leave all of this behind when they left Australia. Person A did not want to risk stumbling across clips or fanart of them and their friends were attempting to reassure them.

CW: Self-harm: Icarus cornered Person A, causing them to snap and try to bash their head against the wall of the apartment in front of them and their sister. Icarus accused them of turning everyone against them once more. Their sister was also upset for this reason. Person A was in hysterics, offering to find a different place to live for the remainder of their time there to placate Icarus. Person A was forced under duress to admit that they were terrified of Icarus and finally said aloud that it was wrong of them to even gotten together. Icarus's sister went for a drive to clear her head.

One on one, Icarus asked Person A to promise they would not "call them out." Among the reasons cited were Icarus's sister's disability, with Icarus worried about the monetary hit they would take from this knowledge being made public. Person A promised in an attempt to make it stop. Icarus acknowledged their relationship as wrong but then justified it as "protecting" Person A. Icarus would later ask Person A in a car together while they were along if they were "still" scared of them, to which Person A lied and said no.

Much of the end of this friendship was filled with lies from Person A, who did not consider Icarus safe, let alone a friend. They would wait out getting out of the country to be honest about their feelings. Person A feels that they were being silenced and controlled, whether or not Icarus was doing so intentionally. Any apology Icarus had offered was meaningless to them due to this, and Person A feels as though this shows a lack of change.

Person A was able to leave in December of 2020 due to the remote learning options set up during COVID-19. They were a semester behind Icarus due to failing a course in their first year, but had otherwise taken the same exact classes with them for four years.

Person A would cut Icarus off in March of 2021. In December of 2021, they messaged Icarus's sister to swear they weren't planning to talk about it more. This promise was broken in November 2022 when Person A was re-traumatized through Icarus rejoining Tumblr, the place this had started. Person A did not learn Icarus was there until November, though they had been there for longer. [link]

Nell's above November messages were sent the day Person A realized Icarus was on Tumblr and had namedropped them both.

It was around this time that Person A was approached by and made amends with the other individual from the DND group. Person A compared experiences with him and he recalled that they had made a similar offer: move to Australia, go to school here. This document will not go further into his experience with Icarus, but this is the second minor Icarus attempted to coerce into moving to another country, isolated from their support systems.

While there is much more that could be said, this covers a lot of the most major parts of what Person A has experienced with as much evidence supporting it as possible. Much has been trimmed from this post for the sake of clarity and brevity. While much of this can be viewed as "he said, she said," they ask that you consider the broader picture. While Person A is not comfortable with comparing these incidents to human trafficking. However, their story mirrors the experience of trafficking victims up until the "exploitation" stage. Any time Icarus stated they could leave, there were simultaneously dozens of reasons thet could not, ranging from guilt, dependency, money, completion of their degree, and trauma.

Reiterating, please do not make Person A's identity known. Please do not approach this flippantly or as "internet drama."

Like Nell had claimed for themself, they are attempting to simply "live."

Person A strongly feels they can not live in good conscience without having it be known the behavior that Icarus and Nell have engaged in. Person A considers both of these people dangerous. Yet, they have had hang-ups about speaking up before this, believing that they are exaggerating the above events or twisting the story to make Icarus is the bad guy. The fear that they will hurt Icarus's family is one they struggle to move past. Given the gravity of the claims, they feel it would not be right to just sweep it all under the rug and fight to move on silently.

They thank you for reading their story and would like to end with something a friend of theirs said in comfort:

"When someone does something that impacts your life it becomes your story, not only theirs. Everyone's allowed to talk about their lives."

#hydrabones #chimericade #wildeornes #deathpoker #toyhouse #webtoon #deviantart #twitter #tumblr

[liaromancewriter]

You've spoken before about Ethan having burnout in book 1, so I'm wondering whether you think that's why he's so 'mean' towards interns? Do you think he had greater patience and understanding for them when he first became an attending?

Ethan himself admits that he had burn out. (I've been looking for this screenshot for days, and finally remembered which chapter it was in.) Incidentally, a woman in my cohort is doing her doctorate on physician burnout and I’m fascinated by her research.

I read an interesting reddit post the other day on one of the medical forums I follow. It asked residents and attendings if they lose empathy after a few years of practicing medicine, the physical and mental toll it takes.

Most people agreed that burn out during residency was a serious issue, which is often what leads to not loss of empathy but loss of sympathy and patience. It gets worse if you continue to work yourself to death in the hospital and not have a life and community outside of those four walls. 

Medicine also seems to attract brilliant but ambitious people, and then places them in a situation of literally fighting for everything (limited spots for med school, residency, fellowship, etc.). There is only so much death, disease and toxicity one can take before you start to become a cynic.

In Ethan's case, we know that his residency was hyper competitive and most people in his cohort stopped talking to each other before it was over. His medical school experience and relationship with Tobias had the same pattern. 

Ethan is clearly brilliant having accomplished so much at a young age, but that "all or nothing" environment changed who he was at the core without him realizing it -- he’d seen it all or thought he had and started to lose patience with everyone but his patients. After all, that's who he's there for, according to him. 

I also think Naveen’s situation played a role in why he was grumpy and mean to Cassie’s intern cohort.

It was obvious he saw the signs in Naveen before his mentor owned up to it. Ethan prided himself on being able to solve any medical mystery and, yet, here is the one person who he cares about the most, someone who shaped him as a man and a doctor, and he can’t do anything. So, he took it out on the interns.

In the normal scheme of things, I would expect Ethan to be demanding of interns for sure, but not mean and certainly not use insulting language (rapid dogs, for example). He has high standards of residents and his colleagues and expects patients to come first. When other doctors don’t measure up, he won’t hesitate to call them out. But I don’t think he would do that because he enjoys it. Rather he wants those doctors to learn from that experience and grow.

Book 1, Ch 3 is probably the best when it comes to showing us this side of him:

When he was a newly minted attending, he was so focused on everything he still had to accomplish, he likely didn't pay much attention to interns. He would share his knowledge during rounds and didactics (lectures), but he was a man on a mission.

I imagine that young residents were fascinated by him because he seemed to have all the answers. I just don't think he was very patient back then either (man on a mission, remember) unless it was a doctor that showed true potential of being great one day.

And then Naveen gets sick and Ethan realizes that all those accomplishments are meaningless if he can't use what he learned to save his mentor. I think it's this single moment of helplessness that soured him briefly.

But over the course of the next two years, he has an opportunity to shape Cassie to shape into the kind of doctor he believes she can be. He sees himself in her. And that restores his faith again in a way that nothing else could.

This is all true even if you don't romance Ethan and see him as a mentor and colleague (I've played that route fyi).

Character Asks: @bluebelle08 @crazy-loca-blog @coffeeheartaddict2 @doriopenheart @lucy-268 @jerzwriter @openheartforeverinmyheart @peonierose @queencarb @quixoticdreamer16 @rookiemartin @tessa-liam @trappedinfanfiction

#ask and answered #ethan ramsey #open heart

[piracytheorist]

hey, read your answer about you being an anime only! i promise i'm not trying to pick a fight, but if you're open to discussing this a little: considering it took endo years to get to this point, it's unlikely we'll be able to get a full S3 next year since there's probably not enough manga chapters. will you be reading the manga then? ps: the manga isn't exactly. spoilers. it's the original story, no?

I don't think I'll be reading it, no. I mean, I can't be sure, my resolve may break at some point and I may indulge, but as I've explained why I'm doing it that way, I plan on continuing watching the anime first and then reading the respective manga chapters.

If I may be a little more personal here, this past year I've been stuck on a job that, while not unpleasant or demanding or exhausting in any way, it was far from fulfilling. This job's contract ends at the end of July and if I'm lucky, I may actually get a much more fulfilling job this September and be more proactive in it in general, so I'll have more time filled with stuff I like. Last fall it was Spy x Family that filled a lot of that hole, and I've been stuck all these months without that nor a job I enjoy. So I'm thinking, if I get that job I want, I'll have less unfulfilled time and thus less dependence on the show (not that I'll love the story or characters any less), so it may be easier for me to wait for ten months again for new content.

As for your p.s., by anime-only standards, yes it is a spoiler. If you go to the cinema to watch a film that was inspired by a book, you wouldn't tell someone what happens at the end if you knew they haven't read the book. That's spoilers. The book is still the original story, the film is still an adaptation, but by revealing a part of the story that a film watcher doesn't know, you're spoiling it for them - and no film watcher is obligated to read the whole book and know the whole content just to enjoy the film. And while Spy x Family is quite popular, it's not common knowledge popular. Saying "Jesus dies on the cross and then gets resurrected" isn't a spoiler for the bible or any film inspired by it because it's a millennia-old story that even many non-Christians know.

When it comes to the manga vs anime debate on what's spoilers and what's not, it can get a little tricky cause you have snobs and purists on both sides, which is why I prefer to stay away from the fandom instead of engaging and then complaining about getting spoiled, because I will get spoiled and it will be my fault. My one request is that, if someone reblogs any posts of mine, to not add any details about stuff that happens in manga chapters that haven't been animated. That's all. But no-one is obligated to read or engage with my stuff, a lot don't even see it, I'm not demanding anyone tag their spoilers on their own posts or complaining to those that don't, I recognize my own responsibility in curating my experience and avoiding spoilers and take the necessary measures to do so. So I don't see where's the problem with me, in my personal blog, referring to stuff that hasn't happened in the anime yet as "manga spoilers".

I understand you wanted a discussion, not a fight, but honestly it's a tricky issue, and I'd really really rather not get into the bad side of a purist, whether they're a manga or an anime purist. And such a discussion can be derailed very easily, so while you're welcome to discuss it with me in a civil manner, I will stop it if I feel it can get out of hand.

I'm not mad or upset at you or anything. I'm just a little wary because I know how toxic fandoms can get, especially when they hold some very passionate beliefs about what's "right" and what's "wrong" in the way other people consume fictional media.

#nette speaks #anonymous #ask and ye shall receive