#one of the girls in my program was at my camp in 2020 when i first started and when i saw her at ny new job i said hi and she said 'how do

[theskategatsby]

3A: From the dream team to catastrophe

Aliona Kostornaia, Alexandra Trusova and Anna Sherbakova, better known as 3A, are 3 Russian figure skaters coached by Eteri Tutberidze.

While they were juniors, they were always seen dominating competitions by placing 1st, 2nd and 3rd. Only losing to each other.

Alexandra Trusova, popular for starting the quad revolution in women's figure skating, was seen as the 'leader' of the group, she was expected to start winning everything when she turned senior. Aliona Kostornaia was seen as the most artistic, graceful and theatrical one, she can't jump any quads, but she does have a triple axel. Anna Sherbakova on the other hand, can jump quads, yet she is the least talked about in this trio.

They all turned from juniors to seniors at the same time, and contrary to what most people expected, Aliona Kostornaia starts winning all the competitions. In May 2020, it was announced that Alexandra (also known as Sasha) would be leaving Team Tutberidze for The Angels Of Plushenko. Only a month later, it was announced that Aliona would also be leaving Team Tutberidze for The Angels Of Plushenko. Eteri Tutberidze and Evgeni Plushenko had a dispute not long before this about another skater, Evgenia Medvedeva, and they were still not on good terms.

Sasha mainly moved to Plushenko so she could be #1 at the camp and have all the attention on her, specifically from Sergei Rozanov, who is a coach who previously worked at Eteri's camp, but moved to Plushenko. He is the coach that helped all of 3A to get their jumps, this is another reason why Eteri and Plushenko are rivals. Sasha was unhappy about her main competition, Aliona, also moving to Plushenko and being coached by Sergei. A schedule had to be made where neither of them could see each other on the ice or even leaving/entering the rink. Because Sergei started coaching Aliona again, Sasha didn't want to be coached by him anymore and she started working with a different coach.

A few months later, Aliona decided to move back to Eteri, but she was given a very hard time. She was forced to give an interview on Russian state television apologising for what she did and practically begging Eteri for forgiveness. Sadly, Aliona got infected with COVID this season, which took her out of most competitions this season. Eventually, Eteri allowed Aliona to return to her camp under one condition, she had to get her triple axel back within 2 months.

Sasha also moved back to Eteri later because of the Eteri bonus, which basically means that those coached by Eteri get higher scores in competition. This switch was just in time for the olympic season, for these olympics, there were only 3 spots for the Russians, and one of them was already taken by Kamila Valieva. There were 6 more olympic-level athletes who had to battle it out for 2 spots to go to Beijing. Due to the level difference between Russian figure skaters and the rest of the world, going to the olympics almost guarantees coming home with a medal. After Sasha showcased her 5-quad record breaking performance at Russian test skates, she was also set to go to Beijing. This whole season, Eteri's team spoke very negatively of Aliona during press conferences, calling her lazy and saying that her personality is the reason she can't land quads. Suddenly, Aliona posted a picture of a broken arm, which knocked her out of the battle to go to the olympics. There was still a battle between Jelizaveta Tuktamysheva and Anna Sherbakova over who would go to the olympics, but because the federation has a preference for Eteri girls, Anna was chosen to go. At the time, Anna didn't even have any ultra C elements in her programs, but she ended up performing ultra C elements at the olympics.

These heartbreaking olympics ended with Anna in first place, Sasha, heartbroken, in second, and Kamila, the favourite to win gold, in 4th place. I have a more detailed post about Beijing 2022 on my blog if you're interested.

These olympics marked the end of the dreamteam that was 3A, and this will go down in history as the death of figure skating.

#alexandra trusova #aliona kostornaia #anna sherbakova #figure skating #russian figure skating #olympics #3A

[satellite-blossom]

tell me the story of your greatest creation!

Oh boy, "greatest creation"...? It's gonna be hard to pick one since I've relearned to love what I create.

I've worked on a lot of things : art, animations, custom game content, written stories, OCs, edits, ... I'm not sure what to pick !

At risk of sounding cheesy, I must admit that I feel like my greatest creation has yet to come ; not that what I've done so far isn't good already, I just feel like I keep improving ! My greatest creation of yesterday may not be my greatest creation of tomorrow, and that's to say nothing about the months, the years, the decades that await me !

Every time I put together a new fairy kei outfit (IRL ; yes I do actually wear pastel alt fashion !), I feel like it's my best coord so far.

Every time I tweak something in my artstyle, I feel like it's the greatest my art has ever been.

When I make a new bead bracelet I think "wow this one is even cuter than the others !".

Every time I come up with a cute outfit for a piece I think it's the cutest fit I've ever drawn...

It's something of an exaggeration/hyperbole of course, but I do feel like I'm constantly improving lately. I've stopped hating on every word I write, every piece I draw, every mistake I make, ... ; I enjoy creating things and looking back on them now ! It wasn't a magical switch, getting new meds and a better environnement greatly helped. Also I must say that switching to better art programs helped too ; of course you feel more frustrated with your art when it took over ten hours to make, drawing with your fingers till they hurt, using a barebone app running on an overheating phone just for your art to seem lesser than other artists'.

I guess I could make a short list of some of my favorite things from over the years ?

1) Some of my earliest drawings made with Sony Sketch, the drawing app I've used the longest :

This app made my hands hurt (literally, that's not a joke) but I've managed to make some cute things with it. I look back on this era fondly ; I used to draw a lot and be very positive about my art back then.

2) Some small animations I've made with Flipnote Studio 3D :

I used to make silly animations with the original Flipnote Studio for the DSi, so when the 3D version arrived I've tried to make a few things. It was super hard but I've managed to make some gifs a few years ago ! The smoothie one was for a fan-made Splatfest on Amino ! The dog is the mascot of a French YouTuber called Mister Flech ; the colors came out a little wonky when I've exported the animation as a gif... The red girl is Google Plus-chan, and lastly we have Finalfest Pearl doing... A thing. I was team chaos, by the way !

3) Some of my 3DS games shenanigans :

Here you have screenshots from two of my favorite 3DS game : The New Style Boutique 3 & Animal Crossing : Happy Home Designer ! As you may be able to tell, I love the 3DS to bits and I adore games that are easy to customize !

4) New Horizons shenanigans :

Here you can see my island : Saly ! It's the first ever island/town I got to five stars, and it's not even done yet ! Still, it has many corners I love, like the orange county side, the camping area, the museum area or even my pink fair ! All of the custom designs there were made by me ! I've improved a lot since 2020 already !

5) My more recent art :

Here you have a piece from 2020, one from 2021 and the two last ones are from this year !

I've kept trying new things and improving I think ! But I still love those four pieces, and they're just some of my favorite drawings of mine.

And lastly...

6) My main OC : Léa Acorn !

They've come a looooong way since their first appearance ! And they've remained my flagship OC ever since !

Dimensional Hoper, Magical Enby, and Tortured Soul it's them ! The blorbo from my brain that I love but keep putting in the worst situations. But hey at least I know how their story ends now, and they get a revenge & peace at last !

I used to be very self-conscious about Léa ; I was afraid of people calling them a "Mary Sue" or mocking the fact I was using them to depict a fantasy of mine, so I used to talk somewhat derogatorily of them to say "hey I know it's a Sonic OC (how cringe !) but don't worry I'm aware of the cringe and Mary Sue stuff, see I'm mocking myself first so you don't have to !", and I think it was pretty sad. Even though Léa's "Mary Sue" attributes are justified in the narrative now (loved by most people, super powerful, ... for reasons that would spoil everything), I think it would be fine if I hadn't tried so hard to rework them. I'm proud of the progress I've made, but sometimes you just have to be self-indulgent and have daydreams about someone kinda like you going on adventures and beating their abusers up, y'know ?

Anyway I'm glad of where I've taken Léa, the flagship of my current paracosm. And I'll never get tired of rambling about them, haha.

Not sure if this really answers the ask, but I've enjoyed rambling here, so thank you for the ask !

#berry rambles #berry sweet asks #berry replies

[oldsalempost-blog]

The Old Salem Post

Our  Local Tamassee-Salem SC Area News each Monday except holidays          Contact: [email protected]                                Distributed to local businesses, town hall and library.                            Volume 6 Issue 31      Week of August 1, 2022                https://www.tumblr.com/settings/blog/oldsalempost-blog                                             Lynne Martin Publishing

EDITOR:  I recently discovered the true power of a parable, in the movie, Burden.  My ears were opened as scripture refers to.  One can talk all day about what someone should or should not do, but when the situation is spoken in a parable, the universe opens. King David wept when he realized the parable,  the Prophet Nathan spoke of, was for him. King David was the wealthy man who stole the poor mans only sheep.   If we have ears, let us hear this parable:  A little boy was born in poverty, a little girl was born in riches. Jesus loves them both equally, no matter what color they are, no matter where they live, and no matter if they go to church. LMartin                                                                                                                                   TOWN OF SALEM:  Downtown Market every Sat. 7a-1p.                                                                                                                                   SALEM LIBRARY: Mon: 10am-6pm, Tues-Friday: 9am -5pm. Closed 12-1.   944-0912  Wishing our Friend Well:  Dan Polk is retiring from our Salem Library.  There will be a drop- in reception for him on Monday, Aug 1 from 2pm-5pm. Tweens&Teens Lego club: Aug 8, 4:30-5:30pm.   Preschool Storytime: Aug 9, 16, & 23  at 10:30am.  Adult Book Club Zoom online: Aug 30 at 3pm.  The Book is Forest of Vanishing Stars.                 Movie Suggestion:  Burden:    Movie released in 2020, and filmed in Laurens SC, based on the true story of the opening of a KKK museum in 1996.   This movie tears at the hearts of true loving and God-fearing people, especially those who are proud of our southern heritage, but shocked, ashamed, and heart-broken over how mankind continues to treat others differently, when we are all God’s children, no matter what color we are.   Please see this movie and share with others how love changes the hearts of people who hate for no reason at all.  You may check it out at our local Salem library. LM

Jocassee Valley Brewing Company (JVBC), 13412 N Hwy 11 Open 8am-9pm Wed-Sat,  Events this week: Wing Wagon South, Wing Wed&Blue Grass Jam, 6:30pm.  Fri: Food: Wing Wagon South, Music: TBD at 6:30pm.  Sat: Food:  IRON PIG.  Music: Ned Lucas 6:30pm.   Mimosa Sunday: 11am-7pm Iron Pig BRUNCH, Music: Foreign Landers at 4pm.      COFFEE SHOP Wed-Saturday 8am-9pm. Serving Martha’s Marvelous Munchies! JVBC hosts Landscape Art Class with Sylvia Garza, $30 for 2 hour class and supplies:  Thurs, August 18,  5pm-7pm  Preregister.  864-873-0048.                   

  + ASHTON RECALLS+             By Ashton Hester        Here's another story for The Post. I was amazed at how much walking these girls did. I used to think I'd done something Spartan when I would walk nine miles from Walhalla to Seneca:                                       TAMASSEE CAMP FOR GIRLS THRIVED IN 1921 - (The following story was in the July 27, 1921 issue of the Keowee Courier). . .This being the fourth and last week of Tamassee Camp for girls, under the direction of Rev. and Mrs. I.E. Wallace, brings to a close a most happy and delightful season for a large number of girls. . .They have gone to camp in "installments" of 25 to 30 girls every week, as some would leave and others take their place. . .There were many pleasures for the campers as well as much instruction. They had a strenuous program which began with reveille at 6 a.m., but they have been reported as being a fine set of girls and doing every thing cheerfully and in an orderly manner and on scheduled time. . .With one voice, thanks is given to Mr. and Mrs. Wallace and all who did so much toward giving the girls such a wonderfully happy time at Tamassee Camp. . .The program for the last week of camp is as follows:. . .Monday, Hike to Oconee Station, 12 miles; Tuesday and Wednesday, a two-days' hike to Jocassee and Whitewater Falls, 35 miles; Thursday, Camp fire and supper on the rocks at the river; Friday, Grand finale swimming meet, beginning at 4 p.m.; Friday night, Final stunt night; Saturday, Hike to Mayuka Falls, 18 miles. . .This is a strenuous program, but most of the girls are in fine shape for strenuous work and are enjoying it. . .A great many visitors were at the camp Sunday. . .Every one at the camp is safe and happy!. . .(Footnote written by me, Ashton Hester: They walked 65 miles in six days! I think that calling that "strenuous" is a bit of an understatement!)

Photo Opportunities  * A Christmas gift for your siblings: find twelve childhood pictures and get CVS to fashion them into a 2023 calendar.  *  Life speeds by so quickly.  Only in retirement do we have time to reflect.  Find a photo of a beloved person “gone too soon.”  It could be your aunt or your favorite teacher.  For $10 CVS will blow the photo to life size.  Cover your TV screen with this picture:  reflect on how the person blessed your life.   * Thought for the week:  Instead of making up excuses, make your plans materialize by planning and working hard.   I LOVE YOU!    Miz Jeannie  

Volunteer at the Eagles Nest Art Center, ENAC:   We need volunteers!  Call 864-280-1258.  We need help with the outside and inside areas to be inviting, welcoming and pleasing to our patrons. Help us get the word out about our events.  Help us start community plays,  help with events, a treasure store and  fundraising,  We are a small Board of Directors with big hearts to do good for our community. Our next scheduled event is the Whitewater Heathens made up of duo Randal Martin and Austin Grant on September 17, 2022. Proceeds benefit Randal’s dad, Scott, who has been battling major medical problems.                              

Tamassee DAR is now taking enrollments for the 2022-23 school year. Last school year 81% of our students improved in reading, 84 % improved in math, 78% completed at least 3 citizenship projects, and 100% participated in STEM program activities.  Call Mrs. Hope today at 864-944-3022, ext 118,  for more information to enroll your student.   School starts Aug 15.  Transportation is available from Tamassee-Salem Elementary, Walhalla Elementary, and Middle,  and  Keowee Elementary.  Let Tamassee help your child have a successful academic school year.  Scholarships are available for qualifying families.

Local Business Highlight                                                                          Sunrise Farm Bed and Breakfast:  Sunrise Farm Bed and Breakfast, located 325 Sunrise Drive in Salem is beautiful, and unique to our area.  We welcome folks from near and far.  Many locals stay with us, sip lemonade or sweet tea on the front porch, and reminisce about days gone by.  They also enjoy interacting with our friendly menagerie of animals.   Recently, we joined the Upstate Heritage Quilt Trail.  The quilt block is attached to our barn.  It replicates the quilt that hangs in the stairwell of the main farmhouse.  Greg and I enjoy reading The Old Salem Post!  It's always interesting and keeps us informed about what's happening, so we can share it with our many guests.   864-944-0121           http://SunriseFarmBB.com

Prayer:  Heavenly Father, Help us to bear the fruit of Your Holy Spirit that others will see You in us. Amen                                Scripture: Galatians 5:22..  “the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, faithfulness, goodness and self-control.” …….And the greatest of these is love..Love will manifest the all the rest.

Home Remedies: Petroleum Jelly: Heals wounds and cuts. Calms irritation. Locks in moisture reduced bacteria encourage healthy new cells.      End dandruff :  Mix 3 drops tea tree oil and 1 tablespoon coconut oil.  Rub onto dry scalp for 2 mins then rinse.   Tea tree oil is said to be an antiseptic that kills yeast.    

[rhinojulie]

Cringy stories of unconfidence and where my newfound confidence came from...

I decided to share stuff more openly on social media in 2020. I made a cringy video and edited my spaces and ums out.

I didn’t keep up with it very well.

But little by little it got easier and easier to do.

This blog is about how to get more confidence and where it comes from.

***I would watch the video instead of read the blog…it’s more fun with some extra stuff…but some of you are readers and not watchers or listeners so I honor you with this written version that were just my notes for the video****

Yep, you guessed it, I’m about to share where I am now and then I’m going to share some super cringy examples of where I used to be.

But first…why do we care so gosh darn much about what people think????? Well, it’s because in the ‘olden’ days we would have been thrown out of our wandering tribe into the wilderness to be eaten by a bear if we didn’t fit in. And our thousands of years old brain has us programmed to fit in for survival.

Okay, now that we have that settled, back to the confidence topic.

Where I am now:

“I wish I had your confidence!”

I hear that a lot.

My boyfriend says I’m the most confident person he’s ever met. And he’s a musician. 

Where I was then:

I used to eat lunch in the middle school bathroom because trying to fit in was so agonizing. I knew some nice girls but I always felt like they knew things I didn’t, knew how to act, knew what was cool, knew what to say.

I was so nervous before the first bootcamp I taught in the parks that I couldn’t eat or sleep. 

I agonized over every little thing, replaying how the class went in my head and the things I should have done better.

When I started the first Henderson location, I put fliers on doors and got 12 women to sign up.

This was the first time I was going to have all of them show up at once. Before, I would have one or two trickle in to ‘try it’ but then they would leave so it was mostly my friends and family who weren’t paying.

This was different. They were paying $200 a month.

I was trying to figure out how I should treat them, how I should start the class and how I should end the class.

Mom said her aerobics instructor hugged everyone.

So I started by hugging everyone and being ridiculously cheerful and upbeat.

But that wasn’t me.

I mean, I like hugging people, but this was called ‘BOOTCAMP’ not Hug Camp.

So the next day I left the hugs at home and started the class with a hardcore set of rules for the class. 

And we ended it bringing our sweaty hands in and yelling ‘BOOTCAMP TOUGH’ at the top of our lungs.

Much better.

Now let’s talk about dating.

Before, I would change myself to be more ‘likable’ for whoever I was with.

I would also cook, clean (okay, I’m not much of a cleaner but better than most dudes), and ‘serve’ them like the woman most of us were brought up to be.

I would pride myself on never arguing with them and always taking care of them.

Then I would break up with them because you can’t live that life for very long, you know?

With Denny I am 100% myself at home. 

And it’s funny how often I CHOOSE to do things for him, but he doesn’t expect it.

We cook our own food, we do our own laundry, we are independent of one another but best buds.

And because I’m being myself in my relationship, I am flourishing in all the other parts of my life.

I never think ‘I should do x,y or z so he doesn’t want to leave me.’ 

Which is what I used to think until I got tired of it and then I would leave them.

I have some VERY humbling stories from when I was in pretty bad relationships that I will share with my mastermind if anyone needs to feel better about these things (LOL)

“Okay, okay Rhino, but what do we do to get more confidence?”

Well, you know I’m gonna tell you that it starts with loving yourself. Which is something we work super hard on in my Mastermind. And I have a lot of podcast episodes about it, too.

But don’t worry, there’s another way.

Because for me, loving myself took 33 years LOL. And you might want to go out of your comfort zone and do something cool NOW, not years from now.

The other way to get confidence is through repetition.

It’s by taking a tiny step that is uncomfortable and doing it again and again until it becomes comfortable and then taking a further step.

It’s just like learning to ride a bike or learning to drive or learning a new job. It’s tough at first, but then to quote my Grandpa, ‘Everything is easy when you know how.’

With writing, making podcasts, making videos, speaking, starting a new business…just take the first step knowing that it will get easier and easier.

Meanwhile, know that your subconscious is fighting you the entire way.

Because it’s trying to keep us safe.

Historically, new things could mean danger or death.

So whenever those thoughts come up that try to keep you from your new thing you are trying…ask yourself ‘is that true?’ ‘What is a truer thought?’

For example… you want to start a new business. Or you want to start putting yourself out there and making more content for your current business.

But something keeps stopping you.

Journal out the thoughts that come up.

Thoughts could be:

“I’m afraid my friends will laugh at me”

“I’m afraid I will fail”

“I’m afraid my idea isn’t as good as I think it is”

Then…ask yourself, ‘what’s a truer thought?’

“My friends will support me. “

“The only people whose opinions matter are the ones I’m helping with my new idea/content.”

“I do not fail, I only learn and grow.”

“I will try and learn from what I try so I can try again.”

“I love my idea, and it helped me. I’ll find more people who need my idea.” 

These new thoughts become your ‘mantras’ 

They get written on sticky notes and places on a mirror. 

Maybe you turn them into a little ditty you sing to yourself.

Personally, I just go through my thoughts every morning and make new thoughts. And if the same thoughts keep cropping up, I might make a sticky note or two.

What are your new thoughts?

Check out this episode!

[zhuhongs]

ah, the universality of wanting to see a familiar face. idk i just. have a lot of thoughts

#theres a guy in my chinese class that looks like a classmate i had in elementary school and i couldnt stop staring at him. i just. i think #its him. we werent friends but. its like. wow. i never had a conversation with u but ive known u since i was 5. i hope you're doing well. #funny that we're in the same class in uni huh? #it is him. i just confirmed using canvas. i should message him. #and earlier today i also say a friend from high school. she was a year older but we became friends bc i loitered at the starbucks were she #worked. she always gave me soy for free. she was 1 of my 3 prom dates. we kinda fell putta contact but we live in the same town. she kinda #went off the rails and wanted to ghost everyone and fuck off to seattle. but im glad to see she stuck around and we go to the same uni #its funny. i chose that uni bc no one else from my hs wanted to go there. and yet here i am #and its also smth ive noticed with my students #one of the girls in my program was at my camp in 2020 when i first started and when i saw her at ny new job i said hi and she said 'how do #you know my name. i dont know u' and i told her that she does know me. i was her art teacher a year ago and then she went OH. and now when #ever she sees me she hugs me and says hi. even though shes not in my class. but she knows that she knew me and is still like. fond of that #and my other students from that year i saw again and they all are happy to see me #one of the kids that graduated has a brother thats at ny school but not in my program and said hes gonna tell his brother to sign up so he #couple see me. and another girl always says she misses me. that im the best art teacher shes ever had and im rlly not a good teacher but #she likes me bc she knows me. and another kid told one of his friends on the first day of camp this year to be quiet bc i was cool. bc he #had me last year. and its nice. its nice. its nice to see a familiar face. no matter how old you are #i always wanted to become a stranger. move away and leave after high school. i wanted to start anew where no one knows me. but i realize. #how nice it is to see a familiar face. even if its someone you werent close with. just knowing them. even at a surface level is nice. it #feels good. its comforting really. and i used to hate it. but im rlly learning to value things and ppl. no matter how shallow. its just #nice to not be fully alone. huh.. its a strange feeling #after spending so long wanting to leave and become a stranger. i feel that its actually nice to reconnect. its nice to make acquiantances #and friends along the way. its nice #and seeing old faces is nostalgic. it makes me wish for something i cant really describe #not that i want to return to being a kid. im glad im an adult but it makes me aware that one day. the current me will be in the pass and i #will think of her fondly. and think of ppl fondly. huh #🐌.txt #🐌.pdf

[stephspurs]

A Family Affair | Euro 2020 Football Fanfiction

Life is beautiful and life is cruel. This is a window into the souls of the victorious and the vanquished. In a way, football did come home during the summer of 2021. Follow along Amelia’s journey, navigating the football world as a tactical analyst for the Italian football team, with a brother and father part of the three lions. Will Amelia leave Italy and come back to England? Will she leave the Serie A for the Prem? Will she set aside the bianconeri stripes for new colours, leaving behind friendship for love? Maybe she can have both...

Wow - the response i received in a little under 24 hours since i posted the first taste of part 1 has truly bowled me over! I wasn't expecting that reaction & tbh i would have been happy if 2 people wanted to read this story hahaha! So, i've been writing in the background & the first few parts have already been proofed and are ready to go. HOWEVER! I am open to your suggestions so please please let me know what you think and how you want to see Amelia's story play out. As far as i'm concerned, this fic is as much yours as it is mine! So please enjoy this first part, in its entirety, and let me know your thoughts! Love always,

Steph xx

UPDATE as of 31/07: I've made some additional editing changes due to some feedback about the confusion between ben white (her brother) and ben chilwell (not her brother LOL). Nothing has been added to the story, just the addition of either surname has been added where i think it could be more straightforward - for future readers!

Part 1 | prima parte

warnings; none - maybe a bit of angst? (what sibling rivalry doesn't have a bit of angst)

word count; 1978 words

writing tools; third person until dashed line, first person thereafter.

next update; Sunday 25/07 5pm AEST. Updates will be twice weekly at this stage. Probably Wednesday’s and Sundays from next week!!

link to fic masterlist here

The world of football, no matter how big it may seem, is as tight as a close-knit family. Whether its management staff, senior players, scouts, academy players, business developers, medical team, groundskeeper - everyone knows someone who knows someone else involved in the sport. For Amelia White, it was a family affair.

Having grown up with her father as a senior tactical analyst for many different clubs throughout his career, and an older brother currently playing for Brighton in the Premier League, there was no opportunity for her to escape the fanaticism of the sport. It was what her household lived and breathed, football. Most would think that, with her brother being as successful as he is now, her childhood was shadowed by her brother's success but that's not the case. She capitalised on her ability to think both logically and creatively, and absorbed all of the information her father could give her as if she was a sponge, to establish a name of her own in the sport and advance her career in the sport. At the age of 21 she upped and left the comforts of her home in West London, accepted a position at Juventus within their graduate program & worked her way up the ranks to be their youngest tactical analyst by the age of 24.

So far in her career, the support of her mother, father & brother were unmatched by any. They were all so proud of her for making her own name, proving herself and succeeding in one of the most competitive football leagues in the world. She was smart, tactful, both meticulous and ruthless in her approach to her career and the success of her players. Because after all, they were her players. She worked day in and day out, studying them and their opponents, drafting performance plans and set pieces for every possible outcome of the play, so that they could perform at their best. They had her trust and faith, and she had theirs. This is probably what her family was most proud of, and wished her every success, until she was appointed as a tactical analyst for the Italian National Team for the upcoming Euro 2020 tournament. Which happened to be the same tournament that her brother had received his call up to the Three Lions. Which was the current level at which her father was a senior tactical analyst for the English National Team. The Euro 2020 Tournament was about to be a real family affair...

10 July 2021

It had been 2 months since she last had any contact with her family. 3 months ago, Amelia signed a contract with the Federcalcio, the governing body of football in Italy, to become the Azzurri’s tactical analyst for the foreseeable European Football Championship. In turn, her silky signature at the bottom of the agreement, also constituted a digital and physical contact ban with members of her family that were also involved with the tournament...her father and her brother.

At the time of the contract, and against her better judgement, Amelia hadn’t told her family of her opportunity. She knew her father would be proud, but her brother would be bitter. Her mother was switzerland, completely neutral and rooting for both of her children - but that's not how football works. No matter your role you have a job to do, and you do everything you can to make sure it is your team that lifts the trophy at the end of the tournament. So, on May 23rd her family congratulated her for another successful season at Juventus, and unbeknownst to them, said goodbye for the next 2 months. Until the day before the final match of the tournament, Italy v. England.

Her heart dropped when England won their semi final match against Denmark. She wanted nothing more than for her brother to be happy and for her father to succeed, but she didn’t want to have to go up against them in the final. Ultimately, she knew they were good, but she also knew that she could hold her own and compete with the best. Having a close relationship with her brother, up until this period, meant that she often paid attention to the premier league. This was a major benefit to her as she had already started analysing the azzurri’s opponents. It was her job to know what foot Raheem Sterling preferred to pass with, what direction Declan Rice preferred to take the ball up the field, what direction of receiving the ball did Harry Maguire struggle the most with. So that's how she spent the three days between matches, solidifying her knowledge of her opponents & predicting the plays her dad would be instructing the English team to complete, to attempt to outperform the Italians. However nothing would prepare her for the knock on her suite door, or for what was on the other side…

_____________________________________________________________

“Ciao Amelia, vieni con me per favore. abbiamo organizzato una visita supervisionata con tuo fratello prima della finale di domani sera. sorpresa!” (hi amelia, come with me please. we have arranged a supervised visit with your brother prior to the final tomorrow night. surprise!). I stood there in shock staring at one of my players & closest friends, Federico Bernardeschi. I was a person who didn't enjoy spontaneity, who thrived off of preparation and organisation. I needed the opportunity to overthink every situation so that I could prepare for every possible outcome. This was not my idea of a good time. Of course I missed my brother, but I know just how volatile he can be. Nevertheless, I grabbed my jacket and shoved my sneakers on before following Fede down the hall and into a blacked out van that was waiting to take me to St. George’s Park for my family reunion.

Upon arriving, and after a stern pep talk from Fede (who was my appointed supervisor for the visit - not sure I would say he was the most responsible choice but he did talk some sense into me) I walked into the main entrance and saw my father leaning against the reception desk waiting for me.

“Papa!!” I called as I walked over to him, ready to smother him with my love and affection. My father, Dean White, and I had as good of a relationship as possible, being that he was always heavily involved with my brother Ben’s footballing career as well as his own. I think when I came along, my father didn't know how to be a girl dad, so he took my mothers advice and just involved me like he would Ben. I was glad that I would be seeing him first, and he would be taking me to see my no-doubt pissed off brother.

“Dad, this is Fede, one of my players”

“Ciao Dean, it’s very nice to meet you but i am also her bodyguard for this evening” Fede introduced himself to my father and they exchanged pleasantries. I had a look around the foyer of the facility until I heard my name brought up in conversation.

“Amelia, come on. The boys are just over here. I don’t think you have long before heading back to your camp” My dad called to me. Boys? As in...more than just my brother?

“Hahaha that's funny dad, just show me to his room and we can have our screaming match there. Should only be about 20 or so minutes”

“Ben’s not in his room, we have a recreation room for the players and staff to lounge about and relax in. Pretty sure he’ll be in there. Come on, you’ve never been scared of your brother before. Why start now?” Before I knew it, Dad was leading us through some doors and into a large common area with bean bags, pool tables and couches - all occupied by current first team members of the English National Football team.

“Dean mate, don’t normally see you down here after 7pm. Oh look at that, someone let the trash in.” A loud mouthed player, that I used to adore as if he was my own brother, calls out as he notices us enter the room. And just like that, I shake off my nerves, stand in front of my taller & more argumentative bodyguard, relax my shoulders and stare into the eyes of Kyle Walker - daring him to challenge me and push me further.

“Relax Kyle, Benjamin White - your sister is here to see you.” Dad cut Kyle off. I didn’t need him to defend me against Kyle’s harsh comments, I could defend myself.

“Wow, I thought hell would freeze over before I got the opportunity to speak to you. Of course, I didn't realise hell would look quite like seeing you in that shade of blue.” My brother, Ben, spoke bitterly at me as he approached me from the other side of the room. This, coupled with Walker’s exclamation earlier, got the attention of the majority of the players scattered about.

“Ben, if you let me explain in private I'm sure you will be able to understand why things had to be this way” I tried to reason with him. Letting go of my always-defensive guard and pleading with my big brother to open his mind to see my side of the story.

“As if I would even talk to you right now, the night before the final, you’re probably here to try and get some insider information. Boys make sure you don’t say anything to her, she’s as sly as they come” Ben’s words were as sharp as a knife - but I knew what I had to say would cut him deeper.

“Ok that's enough! You are ridiculous! What did you expect me to do? Not take the job because you’re my brother? This is my career we are talking about here” I challenged him. “If you think for one second i stopped supporting you then you must be even more stupid than i thought. Of course this isn't the ideal situation, I'm proud of you for reaching a final but I'm just as proud of myself for doing the same thing.” I got progressively closer to my brother, who stood there with his hands beside himself, unable to get a word in.

“I came tonight to wish you good luck, to tell you I loved you, to give you a hug and tell you to stay safe and play smart. Whilst I still wish all of this for you, I now want you to know that I want you to play your best so I can be better than you. I can show you exactly how good at my job I am. I want you to know that no matter what way you play the ball, I'll be right there waiting for you. I am prepared for this, I hope you are too - so that it will feel that much more sweet when we beat you” I sneered at my older brother, who at this point, is quite visibly feeling a mixture of shock and embarrassment.

I take a step back, let out a breath and shake the tension from my shoulders. Breaking eye contact with my brother, I look briefly - yet confidently - at the other players in the room and take a step back. I turned to my dad, who was looking at me solemnly, as though he wasn’t happy with my outburst but understood it came from a place of frustration with my sibling. Walking up, giving him a kiss on the cheek and wishing him luck, I turned to look at Fede and began to walk to the door. This interaction with my brother, although supposed to be a nice moment shared between siblings, has only gone and motivated me to be at my best tomorrow, to prepare my players to go to war and to come out the other side victorious.

Part 2 | seconda parte

#football imagine #football fic #jadon sancho #ben chilwell #mason mount #declan rice #kalvin phillips #ben white #jack grealish #tyron mings #connor coady #kyle walker #jordan henderson #dele allí #eric dier #ben chilwell imagine #jack grealish imagine #mason mount imagine #football one shot #tyrone mings imagine #x reader #stephspurs #italian national team #jorginho #federico bernardeshci #federico chiesa #jorginho imagine #bernardeschi imagine #a family affair fic

[mentesimploria]

Dawn of Eve

The program is a social experiment run by Gretchen, she wants to prove that women can be better leaders than men. I don’t think Dawn of Eve is the first experiment that was based in an island, where the subjects needed to test their survival skills and try to work together to complete all milestones. At the end of the season, Leah learns that there’s another group of boys in the island, and that’s when we found out about the Twilight of Adam. There’s no evidence that the boys’ experiment is running at the same as the girls’, but we have some clues that might indicate that it happened some time ago, like a year.

1. On episode 3, we found out that Gretchen was voted out of her job at the university in the last fall (the events on the island are placed in 2020, so she lost her job in 2019).

2. On episode 7, after telling Linh that she isn’t working at the university anymore, Gretchen says she finally has time to focus on her project, she also mentions that she can’t wait to show them what bold measures can do.

3. Throughout the whole season we see Gretchen struggling to keep the experiment running, how hard she’s trying to find financiers for her project. *this is totally my opinion, but it would make zero sense if the U.S Army were involved in the experiment, like, if they were why would she be the one getting financiers for the project?  

4. When talking to Leonard, Gretchen says the girls found milestone 8 two weeks before her projections.

5. The Adam of Twilight’s file says: Control Group. From where I see it, Gretchen is using the boys’ experiment to compare with hers. It may be the one she was voted out of; but we can’t know yet.

When she chose the girls:

·         Gretchen was voted out in August, 2019*

*okay, so I don’t know if they fucked it up or not, but some things just don’t make sense in their timeline. Ex: Gretchen and Linh met each other. Linh asks when she was gonna get fired from the university. Gretchen says that the board will take a vote in two weeks. When Gretchen’s at the bar where Linh works, there’s a poster dating August 23. So either they messed it up, or after she was voted out something else happened, during fall. Gretchen and Linh meeting each other in august fits in their timeline.

·         Linh learns the girls’ names, and who they are, one month after she joins Gretchen’s team. {on episode 7, Thom says she has been with them for only a month}

·         Nora was the first one approached by Gretchen. I’ve already made a post about her, but to sum it up: Nora met Quinn during summer session in 2019, in September she found out about his death and met Gretchen in October.

·         Dot was the second one to find out about the retreat, her dad gave it to her as a Christmas gift, in 2019 (obviously).

·         Shelby was the third one, her dad changed his mind about the permanent teeth procedure after the pageant competition (that happened maybe after January?).

·         Leah was the fourth one, her parents decided to send her to the retreat during Spring in 2020, after the accident. (Leah’s mom mentions to the doctor that “last winter was so hard”; also, Leah met Jeff when she was 16).

·         Fatin was the fifth one, and we know that because she was at the party on the night of Leah’s accident.

 Martha and Toni are a mystery. Lol. Don’t even know why they picked Toni. Maybe it was because of Martha?

How Gretchen selected the girls:

I stand by my opinion that Gretchen chose them based on their age, I mean, aside from the fact that they’re from different states, race and social class. All the girls are 17 years old and none of them are turning 18 during the experiment.

The information we got so far about the girls:

Leah is 17 years old, she met Jeff when she was 16 during Spring in 2019, they “broke up” months later, on Summer. Leah’s car accident happened one year after she met him. Her birthday is on September 5.

Rachel and Nora are 17, their birthday is on November 4;

Nora took summer sessions in June-July, 2019. She and Quinn broke up in August. Nora found out about Quinn’s death in late September. She met Gretchen in October.

Rachel’s episode was a little bit confusing for me, I don’t know if the flashbacks were in chronical order or not. But there are a lot of things that we don’t know about her. When did she know she wasn’t going to Standford. Did something happen, after Quinn died, and that’s why Nora agreed on being part of the experiment?

Fatin is 17 years old. We don’t have that much information about her aside from the fact that she’s a great cellist, loves to party and had a great relationship with her dad. She found out about his affairs during Spring in 2020.

Dot is 17 years old, for Christmas gift her dad wanted her to go to Hawaii for summer camp, he died during Spring. Shelby mentions that Dot hasn’t taken a picture for the yearbook since sophomore year. She met Gretchen during Spring (2020).  

Toni’s 17 years old, she met Regan in 2018, after they broke up, she moved in with Martha and her mom.

Martha’s 17 years old, she was shot in February, 2012 and she was 10 years old. She had physical therapy from March 16, 2012 until January 22, 2013. In 2013,  she won the 39th Annual Powwow contest when she was 11. Also, Martha perjured herself in 2018.

Shelby’s 17 years old, I think her birthday is in November because that’s when she mentions if she can have permanent teeth procedure before the winter pageant competition, she could even start it in the next month (December), and since their parents want her to turn 18 she must’ve thought she could do it 1 year later. The winter in the U.S ends in February, so Shelby must’ve kissed Becca sometime in January and the pageant competition and Becca’s death happened in February.

That means: Gretchen didn’t choose Shelby because she was gay, or Fatin didn’t end up in the island just because she decided to leak her dad’s private information or Nora because Quinn died. Gretchen had already chosen the girls way before all that shit happened. Now, there’s a chance of Gretchen knowing about Jeff and Leah. We know that one of the reasons why she chose Martha was because of what happened to her when she was a kid. Maybe Fatin’s, Leah’s and Shelby’s parents belong, somehow, to Gretchen’s circle of friends and that’s how she convinced them.

This is what I have theorized so far from what they showed us in Season 1. There are still a ton of things that are yet to be proven and confirmed and we’ll just have to wait for Season 2 to further investigate them. Until then, let’s just enjoy the #shoni content that Mia has been feeding us on Instagram.

#the wilds #the wilds theory #the wilds theories #nora reid #rachel reid #leah rilke #fatin jadmani #toni shalifoe #martha blackburn #dot campbell #shelby goodkind

[nasa]

The Path to High Adventure Begins With Girl Scouting!

Former NASA astronaut and Girl Scout alumna Jan Davis eating Girl Scout Cookies inside the shuttle Endeavour on Sept. 12, 1992. Image credit: NASA

Leadership, service, being prepared and doing your best – these qualities are exemplified by our astronauts, but are also shared by the Girl Scouts! Our astronaut corps has many scout alumnae, and over the years they’ve been breaking barriers and making names for themselves at NASA.

March 12, 2021 marks the 109th birthday of Girl Scouts in the United States, which has been inspiring generations of girls through leadership and STEM (science, technology, engineering and mathematics) activities to empower the explorers of today and tomorrow. To celebrate, we’re highlighting some of our Girl Scout alumnae over the years!

NASA astronaut and Girl Scout alumna Sunita Williams, who served as an International Space Station commander and spent 322 days in space during two spaceflight expeditions.

Former Scouts have served as crew members on numerous spaceflight missions.

From left: Susan Helms, the first female International Space Station crew member; Eileen Collins, the first woman to pilot and command a space shuttle; and Dr. Kathy Sullivan, the first American woman to perform a spacewalk.

Former Girl Scouts flew on more than one-third of the space shuttle missions and were pioneering forces as women began making their mark on human spaceflight. The first female crew member to serve on the International Space Station, the first to pilot and command a space shuttle and the first American woman to spacewalk were all Scout alumnae. 

They continue to break records, such as the first three all-woman spacewalks... 

Girl Scout alumnae and NASA astronauts Christina Koch and Jessica Meir made history when they conducted the first ever all-woman spacewalk on Oct.18, 2019. They went on to complete two more spacewalks, successfully completing their task of upgrading the space station’s battery charge/discharge unit. Christina and Jessica’s historic spacewalk was a testament to the growing number of women (and Girl Scouts) joining our astronaut corps; it is a milestone worth celebrating as we look forward to putting the first woman on the Moon with our Artemis Program! 

....and the longest spaceflight ever by a woman!

NASA astronaut Christina Koch smiles for a selfie while completing tasks during a spacewalk outside the International Space Station.

Koch went on to seal her name in the record books by surpassing Peggy Whitson’s record for the longest single spaceflight in history by a woman!

Understanding how the human body adjusts to things like weightlessness, radiation and bone-density loss is crucial as we look forward to embarking on long-duration spaceflights to the Moon and Mars. Thanks to former astronaut Scott Kelly’s Year in Space mission, we’ve been able to observe these changes on a biological male. Now, thanks to Christina’s mission, we are able to observe these changes on a biological female. 

Girl Scout alumnae will also help lead human exploration farther than ever before as members of our Artemis generation!

 From left: NASA astronauts Jessica Watkins, Loral O’Hara and Kayla Barron

On January 10, 2020 we welcomed 11 new astronauts to our ranks – including three Girl Scout alumnae! As part of the first-ever class of astronauts under our Artemis lunar exploration program, Kayla Barron, Jessica Watkins and Loral O’Hara are now qualified for assignments including long-duration missions to the International Space Station, the Moon and Mars.

They took a moment after graduation to share inspiration and insight for current and future Scouts!

Q: A question from the Girl Scouts: What inspires you?

A: “Being a part of an awesome team has always been what inspires me. Whether it’s your Girl Scout troop, a sports team, your class – I think for me always the people around me who push me to succeed and support me when I make mistakes and help me become my best self is what inspires me to show up and do my best.” - NASA astronaut Kayla Barron 

Q: How has being a Girl Scout helped you in becoming an astronaut?

A: “Being in the Girl Scouts when I was younger was really cool because, well, first it was just a group of my friends who got to do a lot of different things together. But it really gave us the opportunity to be exposed to a lot of different areas. Like we’d get to go camping. We’d get to ride horses and learn all of these different skills, and so that variety of skill set I think is very applicable to being an astronaut.” - NASA astronaut Loral O’Hara 

Q: What would your advice be for the next generation of Girl Scout astronauts?

A: “My advice would be to find something that you’re passionate about. Ideally something in the STEM fields: Science, Technology, Engineering or Mathematics, and to pursue that thing that you’re interested in. Pursue that passion, whatever it is. And don’t give up on your dreams, and continue to follow them until you arrive where you want to be.” - NASA astronaut Jessica Watkins 

To all the Girl Scouts out there, keep reaching for the stars because the sky is no longer the limit!

Make sure to follow us on Tumblr for your regular dose of space: http://nasa.tumblr.com

#NASA #space #space exploration #Girl Scouts #adventure #explore #explorers #inspirational women #womens history month #WHM #OTD #science #STEM #women in STEM #women in science #International Space Station #astronauts

[ghstandpucks]

Cutting Edge ~ Nathan MacKinnon

A.N.: Hi everyone! So I’ve decided to write a short story with Nathan MacKinnon. Y/N is a figure skater who becomes the Avs’ new skating coach. This chapter basically just sets it up. The title is an ode to my favorite figure skating movie (the only one I can actually watch without rolling my eyes). I myself was a competitive figure skater, so the terms are accurate. 

Also, shout out to @bqstqnbruin​ for allowing me to bounce this idea off of her! If you have not read her stories, I suggest you check them out! Anyways, enjoy and let me know what you all think! 

ch. 1

Prologue 

As your music came to it’s ending note, you popped out of your signature scratch spin and dug your toe pick into the ice, effectively stopping your momentum. With a backward bend and a hand reaching up toward the sky, you tried to catch your breath as you heard the crowd erupt around you. The whole rink was lifted with cheers as you held your pose five more seconds. Three, two, one, you counted to yourself as you straightened up, bringing your hand in the air to your beating heart. This had to be a dream. No way did you execute your routine as flawlessly as you felt. But as you smiled and waved to the crowd, picking up a few thrown bouquets of flowers off the ice as you skated toward your beaming coaches, it all became real.

You sat in the kiss and cry booth with your coaches Erica and Larry as you awaited your final scores. Sitting as properly and calmly as possible, you were freaking out on the inside. But you didn’t show it. You never showed it. As Erica had told you when you were 11 competing at your first junior nationals, the judges were always watching…and they were always judging. Off ice appearance was just as important as on ice performance.

           You held your breath and gripped your coach’s hands tightly as your scores appeared on the board. You were the last skater of the event, the favorite to win. Your placement would be final, and you were already second after the short program. One by one the judges scores showed, and you could not believe your eyes. They were what you needed, and the crowd erupted again as a first place was placed on the screen by your name. You jumped off the bench seat with your coaches and were immediately wrapped in hugs with happy tears streaming down your cheeks.

           Moments later, you were standing on top of the podium with a bouquet in your hands and the United States flag wrapped around your shoulders, a gold medal being placed around your neck. You were smiling so wide your cheeks were hurting. At 20 years old, you were heading toward the end of your single women’s figure skating career and there was no better way then to end it than this. For you, Y/N Y/L/N, were now an Olympic Gold Medalist.

~ ~ ~

           The following year, you skated your last performance at the World Championship, going out with the best routine you had ever skated. Your retirement year was full of gold medals as you went out gracefully on top. Single female figure skating careers were never long. By the time you reached 22 you were considered old and the announcers speculated when your last skate would be. Even at 21, you felt like a veteran senior at competitions. After winning the gold at the Olympics though, you had become America’s sweetheart. Your retirement at 21 was one that had stands filled with fans, family and friends. Everything you had worked for since you were 4, was coming to an end.

           Continuing with skating, you did shows and exhibitions like every recently retired successful skater does. You traveled with Smucker’s Stars on Ice tour, performed at Scott Hamilton’s Friends on Ice, attended galas, spoke at charity events, and even guest hosted competitions. So when the president of the United States Figure Skating association approached you to be a spokesperson and participant for a new program they were rolling out, you jumped at the opportunity to stay on the ice. Ice was comforting, being at a rink felt like home.

           For the skating season of 2020/2021, USFS was partnering with the NHL. Retired skaters who wanted to participate would be assigned to a cooperating NHL team as a new skating coach. The idea was to provide figure skaters with a way to stay on the ice if they did not want to go into coaching figure skating themselves; as well as provide NHL teams with a new skilled pair of eyes, and footwork that could benefit a team’s skating performance. Though figure skaters could be looked at as dainty and fragile, they could turn on a dime, jump on any edge, and take a fall (without pads).

           That was how presently, the Colorado Avalanche were watching a short video on who their new skating coach would be. As soon as the words “Olympic champion” came out of Coach Bednar’s mouth, the team was curious. And as soon as they saw this petite figure skater on the screen, some chuckled that you would be the one to yell at them about their skating. Most were impressed by your routines though. Clean, sharp, and precise your movements were. Not to mention a handful thought you were good looking. One player in particular could not take his eyes away from the screen though, watching you with an intensity he usually reserved for studying game films. Nathan MacKinnon could not deny that he found you attractive, and his heart gave a small flutter when you laughed during an interview in the clip.

           When the video ended and the lights were turned back on, Coach Bednar got the teams attention. “This is Y/N Y/L/N. She will be our new skating coach for the season. USFS and the NHL have struck a deal for the 20/21 season to see how it goes. If it goes well, it will continue. Not only is this girl an amazing figure skater, but when I had the pleasure to met her at the conference, she was intelligent, kind, and well spoken. She is the spokesperson for this new initiative. She was placed with us because as coaches, we chose her. With all her accolades, I do not need to tell you how many other participating teams also tried to acquire her. USFS thought her personality would work best with our staff, as well as all of you. You will treat her with the respect you have for any coach on this team. If I hear a negative word about Coach Y/L/N out of any of you, you will miss the home opener. She is to be taken seriously, and treated with respect. Do I make myself clear?” Bednar asked, and the team nodded their heads and agreed. “Good. She will be here on Monday for summer camp. Have a nice weekend,” he dismissed his team.

           Nate was gathering his things when Gabriel Landeskog clapped him on his shoulder. “This should be interesting,” he spoke with a smile. Nate chuckled and turned toward him.

           “You can say that again,” he said as Tyson Jost joined them as they walked out of the rink.

           “She’s hot,” Tyson said, matter of fact, to which his captain smacked him upside the head.

           “She’s your coach now so behave,” he huffed, though he was laughing. He had seen the way Nate watched the film, and had a feeling that the center was thinking the same thing as Tyson. The younger man rubbed the back of his head dramatically, and said his good byes to his teammates. When it was back to just the two of them, Gabe turned his attention to his alternate captain. “What are you thinking about this figure skater?” he asked in amusement. Nate tried to gather his thoughts. He hadn’t even met the girl and yet the thought of her being at practice tomorrow made his hands clam up. He tried to hid this from his friend as he busied himself finding his car keys.

           “I’m thinking that she’s more decorated than any of us. Five National championships, three World championships, and an Olympic gold medal. I feel very unaccomplished,” he spoke. Gabe chuckled and nodded.

           “I’m sure that’s exactly what your thinking. See you tomorrow Nate,” Gabe said. Leave it to Nate to remember the skater’s stats before he even met them. He was interested to see how this would play out.

#nhl imagine #colorado avalanche #nhl x reader #nhl fanfiction #nathan mackinnon imagine #nathan mackinnon x reader #nate mackinnon imagine #cutting edge #hockey imagine #nhl fic #nhl imagines

[angelguk]

→ (better) left unsaid — a jeongguk scenario

member: jeon jeongguk

word count: 2.8k

genre: angst + pining + best friends au + yes i stole a whole song from terrace house 2019-2020 (thank you kenny for the lyrics and risako for inspiring the song) + lead singer of an indie band!jk + based on (roughly) 2 requests + i slightly altered the song kenny wrote please don’t judge me 4 my song writing skills + listen to the soundtracks it enhances the experience

soundtracks: why can’t i have you, gloria laing + angela, flower face

Jeongguk looks ethereal. Even from your position in the crowd, you can’t help but slip into a state of awe over the way the golden stage lights falter through his tousled curls. He glows, up there. An angel with a guitar and a charming smile. The music moves with him, gliding from the swift skip of his hand across the strings, coaxing out a melody that fluxes through you. You’ve heard this song a million times - he’d played it just for you before he ever hopped on the stage and began singing out those lyrics for everyone else in this cramped hall. And yet, tonight feels like the very first time. Neither of you had anticipated this type of turn out. In this small town, events like this made little impact; nobody cared about a loud boy and his even louder band. They were an invisible ripple in the lake of ordinary life. But not tonight. Tonight they are everything. There are people in this hall that you’ve never even seen before. You’d heard mumbles about someone driving in from the town over. Whispers of someone mentioning streaming them on Spotify. A girl squealing over a picture Taehyung posted on his Instagram moments before the show kicked off. It’s strange, gazing up at the boy you’ve known for over a decade in this sea of bodies that jostle you around. You feel a little faceless, a little distant. Like a lump of driftwood. But your eyes don’t leave him - they can’t. He just looks so perfect up there. Like he belongs on that stage, beneath the heat of those lights, singing his heart out through songs he wrote on the floor of your bedroom.

It’s bittersweet. This moment. And perhaps that’s why you start crying.

You don’t notice the tears until some girl nudges your shoulder, wordlessly passing over a packet of pocket tissues. Her gaze is sympathetic. You mumble a thank you and wipe away your tears with the back of your hand instead.

“They’re amazing, aren’t they?” She tries instead. She has to lean in to your space to utter those words over the sharp rapping of Taehyung’s drums. Jeongguk silvery timbre can't drown out the shrill of her voice in your ear.

“Yeah. They are.” You choke over those words but you act like you don’t. The wan smile on her lips falters for a second before she swiftly picks it up. And then she’s opening her mouth again. You’d like it if she closed it instead. Something about this conversation is tainting the brilliance of this moment.

“My friends and I are gonna try and meet them after the show. Do you wanna come with us? I bet that’ll cheer you up.” You barely hid the scoff that slips from your throat. The little “I know them” sits smugly on your tongue. But you don’t want to give her that piece of information. She’d begin pestering for behind stage access immediately. And from her incapacity to read the hostility in your gaze you can tell she's persistent. That or just incredibly dim. 

“No, thank you,” you say instead, handing back the pocket tissues. It’s in that instance that you properly take a look at her. Dainty smile, long straight hair, bright brown eyes and a figure you can notice without your gaze even dipping downwards. Jeongguk would like her. He always ended up liking girls like her.

She just gawks at you, a brief moment of confusion clouding over her features before she huffs and turns back to her friends. You don’t miss the way she pointedly aims her back in your direction, despite your bodies being right next to each other. You can’t even bother to pretend to care because you don’t. Your eyes float back to the stage before your brain can even register it. The song is nearly over, beads of sweat already forming along his hairline. Even with exhaustion dragging over him, Jeongguk looks good. He always looks good. Effortlessly so. And when he finishes the song with a little shake of his head and a pleasant note that pulls a vein along his neck with his eyes locked on the crowd, you feel it. A dangerous spark that pangs through your chest. Fast and hard and aching to be heard. You deafen it with the earsplitting roars of the audience, a remark from the girl beside you sailing over your head.

“He’s so hot.”

The short sentence is possessive enough for you to guess her intentions for attempting to go backstage with clarity. But she’s not wrong either. Jeongguk is hot. He’s always been hot. Hot even when he accidentally stained his scalp purple when he dyed it for the first time. Hot when he’s got an old stain marring his grey sweatpants. Hot when he’s camped on your couch playing video games when his house is right next door and the couch in there is empty. Hot when he’s dumping a whole pack of Hot Cheetos down his throat. Hot when he’s crawling into your lap, requesting for a post maths homework cuddle session for recovery purposes. Hot when he flings rocks at your window and asks you to come outside when he could just send you a text.

(Yes, he broke your window once. No, your mom didn’t come for his neck like she would have if you had done it - all because Jeongguk was the son she never had).

It makes the pang in your heart hurt even more. Because you’ve always looked at Jeongguk through that lens - even though you tried your best to never see him that way. And you’re sure he’s never seen you in that light. 

Except once - once you thought you saw him look at you like that. Like you were his entire world. And he never wanted to lose you. You remember it vividly; it's embedded in your memory. A slither of hope that spurred the fire in your heart. Just that one moment. It’s all you ever needed. It’s all you ever wanted.

“New York?” There was a lilt of incredulity in his tone, followed by a quick straight snap of his spine as he examined your gaze. “You’re leaving for New York?”

You hadn't been able to say yes, your throat sealed with sentiments you’d never dared to express. So you hummed instead, the minute sound accompanied with a brief nod of your head. 

He’d fallen silent, still looking at you as if you’d sprouted a second head and started levitating. And then his eyes hit the floor, soft curls tumbling into his line of vision, a strange stillness descended upon the both of you.

“New York.” He’d said it again as if murmuring it would make it any less true.

“It’s a great school, Jeongguk. I didn’t even think I would get in.” That’s a lie. You did think you had a chance to get in. You would have cried if you’d opened the email to a rejection letter instead of an offer one. But the despondency that had slunk over Jeongguk’s face made you hold onto your words. The fact that he still hadn’t congratulated you spoke wonders.

“Oh. Well, congratulations.” He had read the expectancy in your tone but there’s no jubilance in his. And when he next glanced up his gaze was guarded, like he’s hiding something from you. “If there’s anyone that deserves it, it’s you.” But he said it with his eyes trained on the wall behind you.

For some reason that didn’t feel compliment. And when you had attempted to launch into an explanation about the school and its perfect Co-Op program and all the things you couldn’t wait to experience, Jeongguk had halted you, spiralling into a monologue about the new song he’d written the day before. You couldn’t get another word in before he tugged his guitar into his lap and strummed out a melody. He was usually like that - but just for that day. Just for that one day, you expected more from him. 

And then he’d given it to you. When he finally had to leave, he’d looked at you for a moment. A long moment. Something swimming behind the honey of his eyes. The sigh that fell from his lips was heavy, weighted down with words you felt trapped in your chest. The hug he’d pulled you in was tight as if Jeongguk was grappling for the words he longed to put his thoughts into. His chest pressed flushed into yours, an odd erratic beating echoing between the two of you. But the moment his arms lifted from your waist, whatever was ruminating in his head was gone. Vanished into thin air; nothing but a phantom in your room.

Remembering that doesn’t help the pain gripping at your heart. Because today was your last day at home. You had to leave tomorrow in order to make it in time for Orientation Week. This was your very last night with him - the ending of your last summer with him. Summer had been summer; saturated with memories you’ll reminisce over on nights alone, even before your age reveals itself in the wrinkles of your skin. But something about it had felt lacklustre. Perhaps it was the distance Jeongguk kept from you, a sudden barrier erected in the middle of your friendship. He'd spent less time in your home, preferring to crash over at his band-mates or just avoid you altogether. You still gravitated towards each other whenever you happened to be at the same place, an invisible thread stringing your souls together. Yet, Jeongguk still held you afar, despite your attempts to tug him closer. Which is all you ever wanted to do - hold him closer.

The final soft note of the song is strung out, suspended over the crowd like reminiscents of silage. It coaxes you out of your thoughts, gaze gravitating towards the stage. There’s a jolt in your system when your eyes lock on Jeongguk’s. He’s staring at you hard, a strange determination lingering in the way he looks at you. You don’t even hear it, the thunderous applause that spills from the crowd too caught in deciphering what his eyes are telling you. Jeongguk does though, body falling lax at approval from the audience. His fingertips stay fiddling with his guitar as he launches into a transition speech, the smile on his face radiant. You let the words drone over you, mind commemorating the happiness that illuminates his face at this moment. Nothing can describe the bashful blush rising underneath his golden skin and the bright star-like glimmer in his eyes but you try your best to commit this to your memory. Jeongguk looks effervescent up there. Burning like a star on the verge of a supernova.

“This next song,” Jeongguk states, the baritone in his voice filling your chest. “Is for someone I hold dear to my heart. It’s a new one, and I hope you love it as much as I do.” That catches your attention. Jeongguk hadn’t played anything new at rehearsal. He hadn’t shown you any new lyrics either. There’s a sudden heat building in your chest - but you can’t distinguish whether it’s from betrayal or excitement.

Jeongguk gaze skips over you, and then he sighs, a soft sound that echoes from his microphone. “Sometimes, I find it hard to say what I feel. Especially when I feel strongly about something - or someone. I end up keeping it all to myself. But, I would just like to say, to the person who this song is for, I mean every word of it. I hope you don’t mind me saying it in a song,” There’s a huff of a laugh fumbling out of his mouth, “I just can’t find the courage to say it to you in person.”

It’s like your brain stops. Every function halted. You don’t miss the pointed glance he gives your way before he starts strumming again. Taehyung follows the rhythm, his drums producing a beat that syncopates with the thrumming of your heart. You’ve never heard him play those chords before, your palms already growing clammy as your eyes glue themselves to the stage. 

When his mouth drops open, a delicate note gliding from his lips, your heart stops. 

“Those nights you can’t sleep

I can see you’re feeling 

Alone tonight, alone tonight

In exchange for those dark nights,

Without shining stars,

I’ll be your light, be your light.”

Your head feels hot; eyes warm with the torrent of tears you struggle to hold back. The crowd is silent, swaying along to the comforting sound of Jeongguk’s voice. You can barely breathe, throat clogged with the myriad of emotions you can’t organise in your head because all you can hear is the loud frenetic beating of your heart. It doesn’t help that Jeongguk’s gaze does not stray from your own, steady despite the tremor you notice in the fingers plucking out the chords of this song. Your song. It’s evident from his direct stare that he’s singing it to you. And you don’t know what to make of it. There are too many people in this jammed hall for you to let your feelings reveal themselves, but the faint smile tugging at your lips is enough for Jeongguk to keep going, a strange burst of confidence ebbing through his chest. He projects the chorus loud and clear. The words gently glide through the air, wrapping themselves around your heart.

“Wherever you are,

Whatever time of day,

I’ll run to you,

I’ll be there for you,   

Tonight and forever.”

You’re suddenly aware of the new wetness covering your cheeks, a tiny sob drifting from your throat as your palm roughly wipes at the tears in your eyes. It’s sudden, this ardent rush of adoration that saturates your system. So fast that you nearly choke again, blatantly ignoring the pointedly appalled look the girl beside you throws in your direction. The bow of your head is automatic, palm holding back the sob that threatens to escape your lips. He’s still singing, pushing past the own clog in this throat because he’ll never get another chance to tell you this again. It hurts, even from up here, seeing the shudder of your shoulders as you cry. He’d noticed it during the previous song, your tears. The doubt in him had reared its head and Jeongguk nearly tossed this song from the set list. But it had taken a lot of determination on his part to pen out the things you make him feel. He’d never been able to tell you this but Jeongguk loves you. Loves you more than anything he’s ever had the chance to love. He’d first picked up the guitar because you hadn’t been able to stop talking about Hyunmin’s guitar skills after summer camp when you were nine. And it had just spiralled from there; Jeongguk doing anything and everything to get him to look at you as more than a friend but you never did. Not once. As a result, he’d given up. Attempted to erase the lens of love from his vision whenever he looked at you. It had been hard but Jeongguk had learnt how to keep that part of him buried, too afraid to lose the most significant person in his life with the greed of his heart. Then you told him you were leaving, and he felt himself shatter into pieces.

There are people that you think are going to be a part of your life forever, simply because you wouldn’t be you without them there. Jeongguk thought that about you. You’d seen all of him; the good, the ugly and the terrible. And you had stayed. Even when Jeongguk didn’t want to be around himself, you were there. So for you to just leave - leave like you didn't need him in your life in the first place, hit like a punch to the face. He’d tried to brush it off, smiled and congratulated you when he found out, but everything in him wanted to ask you to stay. Just stay, for him. But he knows he can’t do that - doesn’t have the right to do that. You’re too luminous for this small town, and you deserve to shine with the other stars in this galaxy, not fade away into darkness.

And yet, he still aches to ask you to stay. But he'd never do that. It'd taken him over a decade to tell you that he loved you. And he was doing it indirectly too. Jeongguk doesn't have the heart to be that selfish. Even though he's hurting inside, he knows the best thing he can do is keep that little desire to himself. Let the hand holding you tight grow loose.

“How can I mirror, 

Everything you pour into me?

If there’s nothing more I can do

Then I need to set you free.”

#jungkook x reader #jungkook angst #jungkook scenario #btswritingcafe #btswriterscollective #jungkook fanfic #yeah this is uhhh something

[whatisthiswritingthing]

Observation Skills - Part One Lindsey Horan x Reader

I have posted this a few times, but the tags never show up... But let's try again!

Disappointed with her previous season in the NWSL, Lindsey starts training at a new gym  where she meets one of the trainers. 

Lindsey Horan wanted to be the best soccer player in the world and that meant putting in the work. Lindsey was willing to put in that work.

Unfortunately, that work meant being at the gym five A.M., six days a week.  The early wake up was hard, and definitely not enjoyed, but it was all worth it every time she stepped on the pitch, every time a medal was out around her neck. With a loss in the previous 2019 NWSL season, Horan was back in 2020 ready for a win.

This is how Horan found herself at the gym early every morning without complaint. She was back in Portland come January following national team camp, ready to put in the preseason work.

Horan found a new gym and a new trainer, the last thing she expected was to not only see someone else at the gym, but that someone else was always there before she even and her trainer got there. Her trainer, Sean, did not seem as surprised when they started Horans new program. Always giving her a sleepy smile and wave before beginning Lindseys workout.

Lindsey could not seem to be as dismissive of the other girl working out, her curiosity was peaked. Horan couldn’t help but wonder about the dedication of this other woman. The woman athletic, that much was a given based off her physique, she had long blond hair and steel blue eyes that cut through Lindsey every morning.

She was only two weeks into her new program and Lindsey could not understand why this woman was always on her mind, or why she started looking forward to seeing her every morning. They had never even spoken, just always seemingly making eye contact throughout their workouts. The other women always with a look of concentration on her face.

This morning was a little different though, the other blonde wasn’t already working out when Lindsey arrived at the gym.

“Yo! Was starting to think you weren’t showing up” Sean called out with a grin.

Horan glanced up from the start of her deadlift and saw the other blonde walking in the gym, again making eye contact.

“And miss out on seeing you?” the other blonde shot back with a smirk, continuing to a stationary bike to warm up.

Horan continued with her set of deadlifts, dropping the final lift with a grin.

“More weight?” Sean questioned, “I want to max out your deadlifts today.”

“Let’s do it,” Horan replied, grabbing more weight to add to her bar.

Lindsey and her trainer added more weight to other side before getting back into position for her lift.

“You got this Horan,” Sean motivated.

Lindsey took a breath, dropped her hips and started to pull the bar up. The weight raised slightly off the ground, but Lindsey dropped it before she could complete the lift. Lindsey stood with a frustrated sigh. Glancing to the other blonde on the bike, they made eye contact, Lindsey saw the focused looked on her face and quickly looked away.

“I can’t get it,” Lindsey said to her trainer with frustration.

“Go again,” Lindsey looked over to see the other blonde getting off the bike and making her way over.

“You have the strength, we just need to tweak your form a bit,” the blonde said.

“Can I help?” she questioned glancing first to Sean, then making eye contact with Lindsey.

“Of course,” Sean nodded.

Lindsey just nodded and made her way back to the bar.

“Awesome,” the blonde started, “set up like normal, but try with a switch grip.”

Lindsey set up like normal, changing her grip.

“Good, now roll your shoulders back and lock them in,” the blonde described.

Lindsey furrowed her eyebrow in confusion, glancing up.

“That didn’t make any sense, did it?” the blonde asked, while stepping closer, turning and demonstrating what she meant.

At the confused looked still on the midfielders face, the blonde stood and walked to the be beside her.

“Do you mind if I touch you?” the blonde questioned.

At Lindseys nod, the blonde placed a hand on her back, “set back up.”

The blonde guided the midfielder into the position she had described. Lindsey was surprised by the question, not used to trainers looking for consent first. She could feel the strength in the grip, but the gentleness as she was guided into position.

“Keep you back tight, keep your shoulder blades together and engage your lats the whole time,” she finished and stepped back, “try that.”

Lindsey followed the instructions and easily pulled the weight. She dropped the weight with a huge grin directed at the other blonde.

“Good work! Bet you could do even more,” she said with a smile, “I’ll leave you guys to it,”

“That’s why you get paid the big bucks,” Sean said with a smirk.

The blonde just rolled her eyes and turned to walk away.

“Wait, I’m Lindsey,” Horan put her hand out.

“Sara,” the blonde replied, reciprocating the handshake.

“Oh yea, guess I should have introduced you guys,” Sean said, rubbing the back of his neck, “Lindsey, this is Sara, she’s one of the trainers here. Sara, this is Lindsey.”

“Yeah, be better Sean,” Sara said, shoving him gently with a smile, “nice to meet you Lindsey. Let me know if you want a good trainer.”

With a wink Sara was putting her headphones back in and walking away.

“She’s a trainer, I have been trying to figure out who else is crazy enough to be here this early,” Lindsey said with a chuckle.

“Yea, Sara is good shit,” Sean replied, “one of the best trainers I’ve ever met. She trains most of the university teams”

“Should I be taking her up her offer?” Lindsey asked with a laugh.

“Honestly, I would not even be close to offended if you ditched me for her,” Sean agreed, leaving Lindsey surprised, “Sara really is one of the best.”

The trainer remained in the midfielders’ mind, periodically making eye contact throughout the rest of her workout. Now, Lindsey seemed to notice more about the blonde. She noticed the flex of her muscles and how defined her back was. As well as the confident way she walked around, but easily interacted with the other gym regulars, always putting a smile on their face.

By the end of her workout, Lindsey was exhausted and confused. Somehow, she both wanted to avoid Sara, but also wanted feel that confident touch on her back again and have Sara make her smile the way she made everyone else smile.

With a sigh she leaned her head back against the head rest in her car, only to drop her chin down to her chest. She knew what this feeling was, and it had definitely never been directed towards another woman.

Lifting her head, Lindsey put her car into gear and began to drive home. Her mind never stopping the whole time, arriving home before she knew what happened.

Gathering her bag, she made her way into her condo, being greeted by Fergie at the door. With sigh she bent down, picking him up and making her way to the couch. Laying down, with Fergie on her chest, Lindsey pulled her phone and called her best friend to try to attempt to sort her thoughts.

As she listened to it ring, Lindsey tried to figure out how and what she was even going to Emily.

“Linessi!” Emily Sonnett greeted as she picked up.

“I think I have feelings for one of the trainers at my gym,” Lindsey rushed out.

“Woah, slow down, say it again in a speed I can understand,” Sonnett laughed.

“Her name is Sara, she’s one of the trainers at the gym and I think I like her,” Lindsey tried again, slower.

Lindsey became anxious when Emily did not respond right away. But then realized her phone was indicting Emily was trying to switch to FaceTime.

Taking a steadying breath, Lindsey accepted the change to the call. Immediately seeing the face of her best friend.

“So, tell me about Sara,” Emily prompted.

“You’re not going to question that it is a woman?” Lindsey asked, shocked.

“Why would I? It doesn’t matter, all that matters are your feelings Linds. And when I can come back to Portland to meet her,” Emily replied honestly with a wink. As boisterous as Emily was, she knew when to hold off.

“Fuck, I miss you Dasani, that was exactly what I need to hear,” Lindsey let out a breath, feeling the tension leave her shoulders, allowing herself to sink further in the couch, feeling Fergie burrow into her neck.

“Good, I’m glad. Now tell me who has you so smitten,” Emily encouraged with a smile.

Lindsey started describing their interaction that morning, explaining how she thought she just enjoyed working out early but then learned today that she was a trainer.

“That doesn’t tell me anything about her other than she knows how to be a trainer,” Emily said with an eye roll, “tell me why you like her, you obviously noticed her before she helped you today.”

Lindsey blushed; Emily was too smart for her own good sometimes.

“She’s pretty, she has long blonde hair, I don’t know how long it is though, she always has it up when she’s working out. The softest blue eyes, they’re almost grey. And so strong, and she just looks strong, you know? She would put everyone to shame at fitness testing,” Lindsey rambled, unaware of how much she had noticed about the blonde.

“Oh! And she has tattoos, which are awesome, I haven’t gotten to really see them though. She just has a confidence about her too, but not arrogant. She was so casual coming over to help but made sure it was ok with both of us. And explained it so well to Sean without being condescending. She even asked if she could touch me before helping adjust me, who even does that?” Lindsey ended her ramble, looking back at her phone to see Sonnett grinning at her.

“So, you’re going to ask for her number tomorrow, right?” Sonnett asked.

“What? Not a chance, I’ll admire from a far.”

“Why? You seem pretty hooked already. And she works there, so she can’t ask you. At the very least, you need to talk to her in person then.”

“I don’t know how to hit on a girl Sonnett!”

“Just do the opposite as every creepy dude has ever done it to you and you’re golden. “

“You’re making it sound like this is so easy.”

“It is easy Linds, just talk to her, flirt a little, see if she responds and then ask for her number. I’m really sorry, but I have to head to my training now, we will continue this conversation later though”

With that, they said their goodbyes and disconnected the call.

Lindsey set an alarm for Thorns training in a couple, then dropped her phone on the coffee table, closing her eyes and snuggling with Fergie.

With a sigh, Lindsey decided she would attempt to get to know the blonde trainer.

#lindsey horan x reader #lindsey horan imagine #lindsey horan imagines #uswnt imagine #uswnt x reader #uswnt imagines

[letterboxd]

Third Language.

With her debut film Farewell Amor out now following a successful journey on the festival circuit, Tanzanian-American writer and director Ekwa Msangi tells Selome Hailu about the third language of music, growing up on knockoffs of the Rambo franchise, and her favorite African filmmakers.

There’s a subtle musicality central to the way Ekwa Msangi carries herself. She finds melodies in her words: “You hum the ‘m’,” she says when asked how to pronounce her last name. “Mmm-sangi.” And perhaps to a more subconscious degree, she speaks with rhythm, too: “I do think, and I know, and I can see…” she trails off, ruminating on how much hope she feels for the future of Black filmmaking. Naturally, this musical quality meanders into her work.

Farewell Amor is a quiet film, except for when it isn’t. Three Angolan immigrants revolve around each other in an awkward orbit, each trying to make sense of their dynamic now that they’ve left their home behind. Kept apart for seventeen years by the bureaucratic intricacies of war and paperwork, Walter (Ntare Guma Mbaho Mwine) is finally joined by his wife Esther (Zainab Jah) and daughter Sylvia (Jayme Lawson—soon to be seen as Bella Reál in The Batman) in New York City. But they don’t know each other anymore and spend much of their time in silence, until music and dance burst forward as a chance at common ground.

Msangi’s screenplay never dwells on the technicalities of the family’s struggle against the American immigration system. Instead, it plunges into softer, more personal after-effects of dreams deferred. Walter’s walls bear a faded calendar with Barack Obama’s face on it, even though his empty apartment complicates the “hope” the president promised people like him. When his family arrives at long last, Esther wears a silver cross pendant, having made sense of these years as a married-yet-single mother by drawing closer—almost too close—to religion. Sylvia barely speaks at all, caught between a faith that isn’t hers and a home that isn’t either.

Ntare Guma Mbaho Mwine and Nana Mensah in ‘Farewell Amor’. / Photo courtesy IFC Films

The film’s triptych structure emerged after Msangi spent months grappling with how to create a feature-length screenplay out of her original short film. “Having just come off of the short, I was focusing on Walter’s story. But [I] didn’t think that was the most original story I could tell,” she says. “And then, out of indecision between whether I should make it Walter’s or Sylvia’s story, I decided to just do both. Initially it was two perspectives that I was looking at. But I realized that Esther’s story was really the linchpin for both of their stories, and it wouldn’t make sense not to have hers.”

Giving Walter, Esther and Sylvia their own chapters makes Farewell Amor a stronger film than if it had followed a singular, traditional protagonist. Extreme conservatism in one chapter is revealed as a desire to avoid pain in another; one character’s cramped living room is another’s space to dance freely. Writing on Letterboxd, Tabby points out how the three-part narrative structure grants meaningful subjectivity to characters who deserve it: “It’s so easy for Westernized perspectives to steamroll over films that deal in cultural disparities and thematics, but Farewell Amor takes important steps in showing all sides of the story,” she writes. “It was refreshing to see [the characters] each given the space to exist.”

This layering of voices happens in the camerawork, too. Each section of the narrative is marked with a visual language of its own, complete with specific color palettes and cinematographic techniques. Msangi thinks fondly about the work she put in with cinematographer Bruce Francis Cole to make the chapters distinct. “For Walter’s, it’s sort of a slow cinema, where there’s a lot of still framing. It’s almost like he’s stuck, you know? Stuck in the frame between two surfaces, two hard surfaces, a window frame, a door frame. And in Sylvia’s, we wanted to have it reflect her livelihood, her restlessness. All handheld cameras, all movement. And then for Esther, she’s very observant. She’s been taking everything in, almost in an investigative style, but also a little bit romantic. She’s romanticized this setup, so a lot of close shots, a lot of soft lighting.”

Jayme Lawson as Sylvia in ‘Farewell Amor’. / Photo courtesy IFC Films

Music gives Farewell Amor a cohesion across the different storylines. “Music is, for these characters in particular, and for me, kind of a third language,” Msangi says. “It gives you a glimpse under the covers, what’s under the sheets.” The soundtrack underscores strong performances from Mwine, Jah and Lawson, lending depth to their quietude and vibrance to their movement. Msangi also notes how sound became a cornerstone of her collaboration with the actors: “As I was writing from different perspectives, in order to help me get into each character’s skin, I would listen to the music that they would be interested in.” She later shared these playlists with the actors, using the songs to communicate what words couldn’t.

Msangi has a good laugh as she tries to think about the major films that inspired her to become a filmmaker. “You know, I don’t have that. Well, I do have that, but not for the reasons that most of my film peers have,” she says. Growing up in East Africa in the ’80s and ’90s, little to none of the programming on television was local. What did kids watch instead? “We watched Rambo for probably ten years straight, and then Rambo knockoffs for another ten years after that. I decided to become a filmmaker because of horrible Rambo knockoff films.”

“I grew up surrounded by such colorful and delightful and interesting and funny people,” Msangi says. “And none of that was reflected anywhere in the media.” As she grew older, she sought out African films she couldn’t access in her youth. Now, they’re some of her highest recommendations. Ousmane Sembène is the first African director whose filmography she ever got the chance to dive into. Sembène’s 50-year career has garnered him the affectionate title of ‘Father of African film’ among many critics and scholars, who laud him for his dramas, including Black Girl and Camp de Thiaroye. Msangi, however, finds herself taken with his unique sense of humor. She has also been inspired by Safi Faye, another Senegalese director, who became the first sub-Saharan African woman to attain commercial distribution in 1975—and whose film Mossane portrays sexual intimacy with an openness Msangi hadn’t seen elsewhere.

Writer-director Ekwa Msangi. / Photo courtesy IFC Films

In Farewell Amor, Sylvia’s chapter reads like a compacted coming-of-age film. Msangi points to South African director Darrell James Roodt’s Sarafina! as an influence in that regard. “It was showing for two weeks in Nairobi, and I lined up for four hours to watch,” she says about the film, a drama about youth involvement in the 1976 Soweto uprising. “Even though it’s from a different part of the continent, I’d never seen young African teenagers on a screen before.” More recently, she has loved 2011 TIFF breakout and Oscar contender Death for Sale by Moroccan director Faouzi Bensaïdi, and Radha Blank’s The Forty-Year-Old Version is her favorite film of 2020. She’s hopeful about the future of Black American cinema: Ava DuVernay and Ryan Coogler are two of her favorite working directors.

Msangi’s selections are wide in range, but there’s still one thing holding them together: themes of vulnerability, community and celebration of identity, across different decades and genres. In fact, her approach to watching movies isn’t far off from the way she made her own—Farewell Amor maps concurrent experiences of disparate people, and Msangi’s tastes seem driven by the same balance of vastness and specificity.

“I’m a filmmaker who really abhors working on the same kind of story over and over again, the same genre, the same kinds of characters,” she says. “So I’m not going to make my career just telling stories about immigrants or about, you know, their wretched troubles,” she laughs. “I don’t want to do that.”

Msangi’s next project will be an African-American period piece; beyond that, she hopes to make films in several locations: the Caribbean, Europe and all over the African continent. “I really would like to just have a lot of fun with my career. You know? Because it’s a fun and magical industry that we work in! The work that we do in creating these stories and hopes and dreams—we create magic, so it should be fun.”

Related content

Adam Davie’s Black Life on Film list

Shachar’s 20 Films by Black Directors 2021 Challenge

Screenpaige’s list of Black Women in Film

Follow Selome on Letterboxd

‘Farewell Amor’ is out now in select theaters and on demand through IFC.

#ekwa msangi #jayme lawson #farewell amor #african cinema #black filmmaker #black director #directed by women #52 films by women #female director #black woman director #american film #drama #romance #dance film #angolan cinema #angola #letterboxd

[sdeangray]

You know that scene in LEGALLY BLONDE when Elle Woods says, "Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people don't shoot their husbands."? 😆 I love that scene (along with the bend and snap, but that's a story for another time).

I had gotten into a funk. And by funk, I mean depression. I had really struggled with depression and anxiety throughout adolescence, but in my twenties I started going to the gym, started writing again (I discovered my passion for writing in high school... hm... maybe that's why I'm still sick there in my head?) and I was able to wean off of my meds.

It was a good run for a while. I was writing, reading, got a new job, exercising regularly...

And then it all stopped.

I don't remember how it happened. But I got a new job and bought a house, the house too far to go to my gym regularly, especially between working and the communte. So, my gym membership expired, I worked tons of overtime, and then I vegged out on the couch in my downtime. I thought I was happy.

Then, I had my son and dealt with post partum. It wasn't severe, thankfully, maybe more like the "baby blues," but I was crying almost every day, felt sluggish, and found myself slipping into my former, self-destructive mindset.

Last year, around this time, I realized the trajectory I was on and I didn't like it, didn't like myself and the excessive weight I had put on (think like 50+ pounds!), when I stumbled across a weight loss post from a girl I went to high school with. Now, I say "girl," but she was a force -- she would enter a room like a boom box on max, messy bun and sweats (but in that preppy way that worked), a smile so broad you couldn't help but smile back, with a sharp-wit humor and a shining confidence like a pinnacle of light in the darkness. She was part of the Smurph, Hickey, Bowes group in high school, which, to me, and through my lens, was *The Group*. I didn't envy them. I admired them. I wanted to be them, a part of this group of intellectual, sporty, outgoing rays of sunshine. But that was not me.

I was the quiet one, the girl with her head down, passing "under the radar" to use Ms. Cav's words. I thought I was okay with it: after all, I didn't want to be seen, didn't want to draw attention to myself, so I stayed quiet, learning more about the grooves on the floor than the eyes of my peers.

Fast forward to early 2020, when the pandemic was still brand new, when people had divided into two speculative camps: COVID-19 was either the apocalypse or the flu blown way out of proportion. But I wasn't thinking about the end of the World, just the end of my world, and with tear-stained cheeks, I went against my timid, fear-of-judgment, self-preserving nature and commented on her post. And she reached out to me.

I'm now part of her fitness group, a year into the program, and approximately 45 pounds lighter and leaner. But it's not just about the weight loss. Oh, no, it's about so much more than that. Endorphins, as Elle Woods would say. Endorphins make you happy, and happy people don't mope around feeling sorry for themselves. They do something about it.

During my weight loss journey, my skin cleared up, my nails grew in thicker, but most importantly, I found a renewed raison d'etre. I started reading and writing again, and I actually plotted and wrote an entire novel over the summer (it's a contemporary college romance), from beginning to end without stopping. Of the three other novels I've finished, this was the first that didn't feel like work. It was straight up fun. But those other three were completely pantsed, and I've now learned that I'm a Plantser: plot the basic outline, fill in a few scenes, but then pants the scenes themselves. It's my sweet spot.

So, I saw the pattern: Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy Dean writes novels.

#amreading #amwriting #endorphins #workout #exercise #beachbody #BOD #writer's life #writerslife #books #about me #legally blonde #elle woods #behappy

[shemakesmusic-uk]

Texan-born, Brooklyn-based singer-songwriter and TikTok personality Allison Ponthier makes a splash with 'Cowboy' – it's the enthralling first taste of her upcoming EP. Finding a path away from her conservative upbringing, queer singer-songwriter Allison Ponthier is another artist making country music her own. Taking references from Kacey Musgraves and Orville Peck, Ponthier's take on the genre is high camp and features a kaleidoscopic visual world too. Growing a huge following on TikTok, 'Cowboy' marks the start of a whole new chapter for Ponthier with her debut release with Interscope and Polydor. The track itself references her move from the bible belt to New York City and her journey accepting her sexuality. Warm and inviting 'Cowboy' is cinematic pop with some real heart-on-sleeve confessional songwriting. Complete with a masterful music video that runs like a mini-movie complete with impressive special effects, on reflection, cinematic is an understatement. The video itself is a striking and exciting introduction to this new artist, “I probably watch movies more than I listen to music,” Ponthier says of the video. The clip, directed by Jordan Bahat (Christine and the Queens) adds a whole new cosmic energy to the track and aims to amplify the lyrics' detailed storytelling. As she unveils more of her forthcoming debut EP, Ponthier explains what we can expect from her; “a lot of my songs are about being uncomfortable in your own skin but getting to know yourself better, figuring out who you really are.” [via the Line Of Best Fit]

Miley Cyrus has shared the full video for 'Angels Like You'. The pop rebel returned in 2020 with her excellent album Plastic Hearts, a series of superb empowerment anthems. Album highlight 'Angels Like You' has received the video treatment, shot at the Superbowl in front of an audience of fully vaccinated healthcare workers. Miley has also provided a note for the video describing her feelings of gratitude to these workers. [via Clash]

LA punk four-piece The Paranoyds have dropped a new video for track 'Egg Salad', taken from their album Carnage Bargain which is out now on Suicide Squeeze. The video's director Nicole Stunwyck comments "The video presents the glitzy & glamorous world of a teenage girl who, after accidentally catching a beauty pageant on TV, dreams of her rise to stardom & subsequent downfall... It’s not a commentary on anything but an experimental depiction of my own personal fascination for young tragic starlets alà Valley of The Dolls."

Noga Erez and collaborative partner ROUSSO have shared a fifth compelling new single from forthcoming album KIDS which is set for release on March 26 via City Slang. 'Story' is a snappy, addictive song about how couples relationships are always a relationship between two people’s past and present. "Everyone brings their past experiences to the relationship even if things are great" Erez comments. "Sometimes past situations come in and take over." As with the album's previous singles 'Story' is brought to life with a captivating video, starring Erez and ROUSSO, who also provides vocals on the track. "ROUSSO is my partner in music as well as my partner in life" she explains. "This is the first time we tell a story about our relationship in a song and video. It’s a song about a couple fighting and how, in that situation, sometimes what you hear the other person say is not what they actually said. The making of this video was a 10-day couples therapy session for us. As we rehearsed the pretend fighting and martial arts moves we knew that, at times, one of us would get punched just a little too hard. It was so intense and interesting to live in this world, where our relationship comes alive in the most physical way."

After announcing Detritus with lead outing 'Stories' last month, Sarah Neufeld has unveiled the album's second single 'With Love and Blindness'. Neufeld says of the song and Jason Last-directed video, "The video for 'With Love and Blindness' came together through a long-time collaboration between myself and videographer Jason Last. I knew that Jason and I would work together again on some visual aspect for my third solo release, and it so happened that before I even began recording the album, we were presented with the opportunity to do a mini residence on Corsica with Providenza; an amazing collective with a farm, cultural laboratory, festival and residency program." She continues, "I was doing a short solo tour in Europe in the summer of 2019 in order to re-work some of the pieces from the dance collaboration to begin to find a shape for the album that was to be recorded in the Fall. In the middle of that tour, Jason and I travelled to Corsica for several days (graced once again with a suitcase containing Esteban Cortazar’s unique and beautiful creations). Besides performing in Providenza’s outdoor amphitheater, we were immersed in nature, literally staying in a treehouse perched on the side of a mountain, overlooking the dramatic coastline." Neufeld adds, "I found that the pulse of the landscape resonated with the essence of the music, especially "With Love and Blindness"; a sense of rawness, of sensuality, of a strange gravity intensified by the hypnotic summer heat and the general otherworldliness of the place." [via the Line Of Best Fit]

Molly Burman was brought up around music. At every family event, every party, the soundtrack would resonate with her, providing an education in itself. Both parents were gigging musicians, and she always wanted to follow in their footsteps, to use performance as a means of self-expression. Lockdown brought the time and space to bring these ideas into focus, and she's working to unveil a series of one off singles. Her debut single proper 'Fool Me With Flattery' is out now, a blissfully melodic piece of indie pop with some whip-smart lyricism. There's a tongue in cheek element to her sound that is fantastically endearing, matched by the subtle lo-fi elements of her bedroom pop confection. She comments: "I wrote the song after a long day of feeling overlooked and ignored by some of the guys in my life. I was fed up, angry and used the stereotype of a mansplaining misogynist to let it all out. This song is for anyone who feels belittled and like they’re being made to shrink themselves; be as big as you possibly can, and don’t let anyone fool you with flattery." The video is a hilarious showcase for Molly's offbeat sense of humour. [via Clash]

Punk provocateurs Pussy Riot have unveiled their latest song 'Panic Attack', as well as a music video that features a hologram of singer Nadya Tolokonnikova. This is the final release from Pussy Riot’s new Panic Attack EP, a collection of three linked songs that, for now, can only be streamed as separate singles. The title track features punk guitars underneath a tinkling music box melody, as Tolokonnikova turns anxiety into a sports cheer. “Gimme an A,” she says, “Gimme a T/ Gimme a T/ Gimme an A/ Gimme a C/ Gimme a K/ Okay? Okay.” While upbeat and seemingly cheerful, the synth-punk song comes out of the trauma she experienced in a Russian prison camp. As she explained in a statement, “After serving 2 years in a labor camp, I’m still struggling with mental health issues. Trauma, fear and insecurity never fully go away, causing depression episodes and deep anxiety. ‘PANIC ATTACK’ was born as the result of me staring at the wall for 24 hours in the middle of the pandemic, feeling 100% helpless. I was trying to write something uplifting to encourage people to get through the tough times. But I was just failing and failing. Magically, at the second I allowed myself to be honest and write about despair I was experiencing, I wrote the track in like a half an hour. Depression is a plague of the 21st century, and it tells me that there’s something broken in the way we treat each other. The video ‘PANIC ATTACK’ reflects on objectification of human beings, loneliness, disconnection from the environment that causes us to feel small and powerless. And it’s us who caused it with our own hands – that’s why in the end of the video I’m fighting with my own clone.” The music video for 'Panic Attack' was directed by  Asad J. Malik. He used 106 cameras to capture all angles of Tolokonnikova, then converted that information into a photoreal hologram. Afterwards, Tokyo-based creative technologist Ruben Fro built out landscapes reminiscent of video games through which the virtual Tolokonnikova could frolic. But as the visuals progress, those idyllic settings give way to a hellscape, and the singer faces off against a clone of herself. [via Consequence of Sound]

The wait is finally over. BLACKPINK’s Rosé shines like the star she is with her official solo debut. On Friday, she released two solo songs on her debut single album titled R, 'On the Ground' and 'Gone.' With its deep lyrics, angelic bridge, and Rosé’s high note at the end, 'On the Ground' is an exemplary song for her solo debut. Add the fact that Rosé is credited as a writer for the song, and one can really tell how much time she spent perfecting it for release. The accompanying music video, meanwhile, expands the story of life and growth. Rosé starts off looking lost and trying to find herself amidst all the wildness of life; she eventually encounters past and present versions of herself while searching for answers and purpose. By the end, she finds herself and her path forward, and one can’t help but smile as she sings an explosive outro. [via Teen Vogue]

On Ellise's latest alt-pop concoction the rising pop star gets gothic as 'Feeling Something Bad...' transforms a crush into an obsession. An expert at catastrophising everyday experiences, the LA-based artist has arrived fully formed with not only a consistent and cohesive sound but a striking visual identity too. That's even more clear when you press play on the accompanying video for her latest infectiously catchy track. With the clip directed by Joakim Carlsson we get to see Ellise in her absolute element as she brings "Feeling Something Bad..." to life in a macabre world of its own. “I just love dramatising little everyday feelings in life, so this is my big dramatic ‘I have a crush on you’ song,” Ellise explains – it's a song she wrote about a boy she barely knew. [via the Line Of Best Fit]

With President Biden determined to get the majority of American adults vaccinated by summer, bands are earnestly beginning to look forward to the return of live music. Purity Ring are the latest to announce 2021 tour dates, which they’ve shared alongside the video for their track 'sinew'. The song comes from WOMB, the synth-pop duo’s first album in five years that was released just before the pandemic struck. Directed by Toby Stretch, the clip brings back the abstract graphics and costumes that featured in the 'stardew' music video, continuing the enigmatic story of the domed bicyclist and their sun-headed sidecar companion. [via Consequence of Sound]

Australian Pop Princess, Peach PRC releases the official music video for her debut single 'Josh'. Peach PRC comments on the official 'Josh' visuals, “The music video was inspired by growing up watching the same five infomercials, morning news channels and old movies on my little pink box tv when I was a kid and couldn’t sleep on a school night. The idea was to have “josh” feel just as harassed the more he tries to call. Every creative step along the way was entirely my vision, from writing the music video script, to the lyrics and everything in between. I’m so happy and hope all the girls, gays and theys who dated “josh” will sing along.”

#videos of the week #allison ponthier #miley cyrus #the paranoyds #noga erez #sarah neufeld #molly burman #pussy riot #rose #ellise #purity ring #peach prc

[aion-rsa]

Why Black Widow’s Smells Like Teen Spirit Cover Works

https://ift.tt/eA8V8J

This article contains Black Widow spoilers.

Black Widow has one of the best openings of any MCU movie yet, and I will fight you on that.

The story begins in Ohio, circa 1995, where a young Natasha Romanov is living with her Soviet spy family in quasi-but-not-totally-fake family bliss. The domestic dream ends once Alexei has completed his mission, forcing the family to make a dangerous getaway from the suburbs that ends in a tarmac shootout in which Melina gets shot and pre-teen Natasha has to pilot a plane on her own in order to save her family. Once the family lands safely in Cuba, everything falls apart for Natasha and little sister Yelena. They are drugged and integrated back into the Red Room program, which trains (read: brainwashes) young girls into becoming super spies.

We see that process in the film’s opening credit montage, which is set to a familiar song…

Who Sings Black Widow’s “Smells Like Teen Spirit” Cover?

Director Cate Shortland does an amazing job packing a ton of expository information into the opening credits of Black Widow, without making it feel like an info dump. She does this by using a slowed-down, orchestral cover of Nirvana’s Gen X angst ballad “Smells Like Teen Spirit” as the emotional through-line. The cover is produced by composer collective Think Up Anger, featuring singer-songwriter Malia J, who has also done covers of Seal’s “Crazy” and Buffalo Springfield’s “For What It’s Worth” in trailers for shows like Bloodlines and The Handmaid’s Tale (this is the second time a Marvel film has used a Nirvana song. In 2019’s Captain Marvel, “Come As You Are” plays as Carol Danvers remembers her life on Earth).

Why Black Widow’s “Smells Like Teen Spirit” Cover Works

The “Smells Like Teen Spirit” song selection is perfectly period-appropriate. The original “Smells Like Teen Spirit” came out in 1991, charting high on music industry charts around the world through 1992, which means it would have been something Natasha listened to in her American life.

Little Yelena’s favorite song may canonically be Don McLean’s earnestly nostalgic but bittersweet “American Pie,” but you know the angry and disillusioned Natasha, who was older and understood the fragility of the sisters’ life so much better than her six-year-old sister, would have been drawn to the anger and pain of “Smells Like Teen Spirit.” Head canon: “Smells Like Teen Spirit” was Young Natasha’s favorite song.

While some of the opening credits is devoted to showing us how Dreykov has integrated himself into global politics through the 90s to today, the other main purpose the sequence has is to show us the horrors of the Red Room. We see footage of Natasha and Yelena being torn apart, with Natasha using the last of her effective resistance to give her little sister a photo strip of their life together in America. We see scared girls being trafficked into the Red Room, and then some of what their conditioning there looked like, interspersed with effectively suggestive shots of needles and pig test subjects.

Throughout it all, the “Smells Like Teen Spirt” cover plays, a reminder of just how far Natasha and Yelena’s adolescence is from the one they might have had in the American suburbs or, you know, anywhere outside the Red Room. A reminder of the adolescence that was taken from them. This song, which holds such nostalgic value for an entire generation of Americans coming-of-age in the 90s—but with a female voice to relate it back to Natasha’s experiences—works as incredible cultural shorthand for this emotionally complex theme.

The Story Behind Black Widow’s “Smells Like Teen Spirit” Cover

According to Consequence Film, when Marvel contacted Think Up Anger and Malia back in February 2020 with the opportunity, they initially thought it was a joke and didn’t respond. Malia explained: “A different version of this cover has been circulating in the TV/film industry since 2015, and I can only speculate that someone from their camp was a fan and wanted to put it in the movie!”

“I found out during the pandemic,” continued Malia, “and the news lifted my spirits up during such a dark time. I had no idea this song would end up being in a Marvel film, let alone the opening credits. I am such a fan of Scarlett Johansson and Florence Pugh — to be a part of something they are involved with is a dream come true.”

Black Widow is now available to purchase on Disney+ premier or to watch in theaters.

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The post Why Black Widow’s Smells Like Teen Spirit Cover Works appeared first on Den of Geek.

from Den of Geek https://ift.tt/3r0L2fl

#aion-rsa #Den of Geek

[myluciferiscody]

*MASTERLIST*

started; 10/30/2019

updated; 04/01/2020

masterlist for all my ahs characters! :) thank you, enjoy, lovelies. i also do take requests/asks, if it’s do-able, I will be more than happy to write it!

* denotes smut

MICHAEL LANGDON:

Dead Girl Walking

your parents decide to enroll your family in the Foreign Exchange program at your school. her name is Violet Harmon and she will be living with you for an entire year. like always, someone fucked up and now you have to live with her brother, Michael, as well. hopefully he will behave.

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4

Dancing With A Stranger (Request)*

you’re staying at the Hotel Cortez for the week with your best friend, Winter. that night you meet Michael Langdon, the owner of the hotel, also known as the Count. 

part 1 | part 2*

XAVIER PLYMPTON

In Case You Don’t Live Forever

your best friend, Xavier Plympton, was murdered at Camp Redwood. A year later, you’re still not over his death. A spontaneous trip to Camp Redwood doesn’t go like you expected.

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | epilogue

The Last Time

you and your boyfriend Xavier go to warn Chef Bertie about what is going on at Camp Redwood. When things take a nasty turn, one of you has to do the unthinkable

part 1

Grow As We Go

the night your boyfriend Xavier, relapses, you reflect on his rocky past. warning: mentions of drug use

part 1

I Loved You First

xavier plympton becomes someone’s boyfriend. and it’s not you. you loved him first, but his heart is running out. or so you thought.

part 1 

DANDY MOTT:

You’re Ravishing (Request)*

dandy is thirsty, and it’s not for water.

part 1

A Boy Like That (Excerpt)

elsa catches you sneaking back onto her grounds after spending time with dandy.

part 1

#xavier plympton x reader #michael langdon x reader #jim mason x reader #duncan shepherd x reader #dandy mott x reader #cody fern #finn wittrock #american horror story #ahs hotel #ahs 1984 #ahs freak show #michael langdon smut #xavier plympton #jim mason #michael langdon #Duncan Shepherd #dandy mott #myluciferiscodymasterlist