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a-libra-writes · 4 years

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Spending Your First Time With the GoT Characters

THIS IS THE CUTE SHIT I LOVE. One anon requested first time with them, another how you lose your virginity to them, and i figured id roll it into one or it'd become redundant :p

In this preference, you'll be with: Ned Stark, Robb Stark, Sansa Stark, Jon Snow, Benjen Stark, Jory Cassel, Dolorous Edd, Mance Rayder, Tormund Giantsbane, Theon Greyjoy, Yara Greyjoy, Daenerys Targaryen, Jorah Mormont, Missandei, Tywin Lannister, Tyrion Lannister, Jamie Lannister, Sandor Clegane, Bronn, Petyr Baelish, Stannis Baratheon, Davos Seaworth, Margaery Tyrell, Brynden Tully, Edmure Tully, Brienne of Tarth, Ramsay Bolton, Roose Bolton, Oberyn Martell, Beric Dondarrion, Gendry

NED STARK

Ned would give you the most loving expression as he’d undress you, often pausing to give you firm kisses on your lips and neck. He would be nothing but considerate and would make sure you were comfortable with how he touched you and how quickly he undressed you. He’d end up forgetting his own clothes as he’d lie you down and caress down your body. He’d love just touching and squeezing your soft skin before slipping his rough fingers between your legs and stroking you while giving you firm kisses. As much as Ned would be aching for you, he wouldn’t enter you until you were sufficiently relaxed and quivering with pleasure. Once you were ready and you felt him fill you up, he’d love how you’d adjust your hips and sigh as you’d make yourself comfortable.

ROBB STARK

He’d be grinning like a fool, cheeks red and eyes bright at the fact such a lovely, wonderful person wants him. Robb would waste little time in giving you plenty of kisses and firm touches, eagerly wanting to move your clothes aside so he could feel your skin. The more you’d undress, the more eager he’d become, especially as you’d return the touches. He’d love to grind himself against you first, getting both of you out of breath and taking his time to make sure you’re ready. He’d keep you close as he’d enter you, taking a moment to ask if you’re alright even as he’s breathless and biting at your neck.

SANSA STARK

She would be a little nervous initially, but the worries would slowly melt away as you began to get lost in kisses and touches. Sansa would want to undress you first, taking in your breasts and hips and thighs as she began to slide the clothes off. She’d take her time touching and stroking between your legs, before long she’d ask if she could taste you. Sansa would have a surprising confidence, doubled by you returning the affection and wanting to pleasure her just as much. She’d be so turned on by your first orgasm that she’d just have to push you a little further, giving you extra touches while you gasped from the over-sensitivity.

JON SNOW

He would try not to be nervous himself, trying to play it cool and “take the lead” so to speak, but as you’d crawl into his lap and kiss him until he can’t think straight, that would go out the window. He’d want nothing more than to feel every bit of you with his hands, stroking the warmth of your thighs and pressing his fingers into your warmth. He’d love the way you’d gasp and squirm and he’d want to use his tongue to make you come. He’d be more than eager to be inside you, but he’d take his time, giving you sweet praises as you adjusted to the new sensations. He’d want to kiss you, and he’d find it incredibly sexy when you moaned against his lips and held him closer.

BENJEN STARK

Knowing that it was your first time with anyone, Benjen would go out of his way to make you feel like a spoiled princess. He’d praise everything, touching what he liked and kissing what he loved. He’d figure out what flustered you the most and do it without mercy. You’d tell him to knock it off with the teasing, but then he’d get serious, making you come fast and hard with his tongue. Once he licked you clean, he’d have a devilish smile as he’d ask if you’re ready. He was aching to be inside you, but Benjen understood that he had to take his time. Of course, he was more than eager to speed up his thrusts as you’d become more comfortable and beg him for it. Benjen would want you to claw at his back and his arms, not minding in the slightest if you left marks.

JORY CASSEL

He’d be so happy that you were wanting to be with him, and once he learned he was your first, he was almost adorably determined to make sure it was enjoyable for you. You’d sigh and moan in contentment as he carefully touched and stroked you, leaving firm kisses on your breasts and stomach as he made his way to your legs. He was almost worshiping your body, lost in your scent before he finally dipped in his tongue and made you cry out and rock your body against him. Once you came, he’d still have bright red cheeks as he’d ask if you were comfortable, or if you wanted to stop. Jory would be a bit embarrassed by how you eagerly helped him out of his own clothes, and he’d love to hold you close as he entered you carefully.

DOLOROUS EDD

Edd would be … conflicted. On one hand, he was ridiculously, stupidly in love with you. On the other, he felt like you deserved so much more than someone like him, especially in whatever dingy room you two could find for privacy. Once you reassured him with a firm kiss and began removing his clothes yourself, the outside began to slowly melt away as you two entered your own little world. He'd want to touch as much of you as possible, kissing every bit of your neck and chest. You're often hidden under so many layers, so Edd wanted to take in as much as possible. As he'd slowly enter you, he'd bury his face in your shoulder and mutter a string of sweet praises.

MANCE RAYDER

It was obvious by the way he looked at you that he cherished and desired you, but Mance also understood boundaries. When you started to straddle him while you made out and guided his hands under your clothes, he was more than happy to oblige you. He'd kiss and leave hickeys on your neck while he pulled your clothes away, complimenting your lovely body. He loved the blush that crept on your cheeks as he teased your body and slipped his fingers between your legs, getting you wet and clinging to him before he led you to his cock. Between an encouraging smile and heavy breaths, he’d encourage you to ride him at your leisure and chase your pleasure first.

TORMUND GIANTSBANE

He’s thought so much about being with you, but he never thought someone as fiery and lovely as you hadn’t been with someone before. Tormund felt like you were giving him something precious, and he just knew you had to be taken care of properly. He made sure your shared tent was full with comfortable furs and a warm fire, and he had a surprisingly tenderness as he undressed you and massaged the knots from your muscles. While he was fine with you undressing him, he made sure you were lying back like a spoiled cat so he could kiss your thighs, leaving little bites and pleasuring you until you were grabbing his hair and filling the tent with your moans. He’d want to keep going, too - giving you a second orgasm before he was pulling you into his lap, peppering kisses all over your neck and asking if you were ready for him.

THEON GREYJOY

Theon would have the most smug look on his face when you told him, assuring you that he knew all along, and he was absolutely going to give you a “night to remember”. You punched his arm and he laughed as he reassured you. Theon would want to kiss you everywhere and left several love bites as he’d gradually undress you. He’d start to lose his attitude as he took in your body and flushed cheeks, surprised such a pretty, well-born girl like you wanted to be with him at all. His hands would greedily explore every bit, and his lips would do the same. He’d eat you out with a ferocity that dissolved you into gasps and shudders, then ask if you’d like more. It was hard to keep his smug attitude when he was too flustered over how flushed your cheeks were and how content you were.

YARA GREYJOY

All Yara could do was smirk. While she was taken by some surprise, she liked that you told her matter of factly, with no shyness or shame. She decided to make it a memorable night for you, pulling you into her lap as soon as you both entered her captain’s quarters, She had all sorts of fun, leaving hickeys on your neck, teasing your body through your clothes before finally slipping her fingers in. Even then, she kept denying your pleasure, taking her fingers away just as you were about to finish. By the fourth time she did this, you irritably told her to hurry up, which you quickly realized was a mistake. Yara flipped you over, pinned you down and wickedly asked what her dear lover wanted. You’d end up begging for it several times by the time the night was over.

DAENERYS TARGARYEN

Dany was pleased when you told her, and she wasn’t sure why. It wasn’t until you were comfortable and wanted to spend an evening with her that she realized it. She remembered being so afraid when her first time came. She didn’t want you to feel a fraction of that fear. Dany would spend some time touching your body as she removed your clothes, giving you light kisses and taking her time to ensure you were comfortable. She wanted to both explore your body and let you take in all the sensations. Once she reached between your legs, she loved feeling your wetness and how you gasped with her lightest touches. Even after you’d come with her fingers, she’d ask if she could use her mouth next, and you noticed after both times she was very pleased with herself.

JORAH MORMONT

While he’d have a fleeting moment of worry about your age difference, and if he really deserved someone such as you, he was quickly filled with adoration as you assured him that you wanted to be with him. Jorah would seat you in his lap and give you long, deep kisses as you touch his body as you pleased. Once you were comfortable, he’d undress you himself, earnestly telling you how beautiful and sweet you were. He’d end up flustering you with how he was so genuine with his praise. Jorah would want to taste you almost immediately, kissing you straight down to your legs, and pleasuring you until you were a quivering, gasping mess. By the time he pulled you back into his lap and thrust inside you, you were clinging to him and grinding your hips to take him deeper.

MISSANDEI

She hadn’t had much experience herself, and none of them were particularly good memories, so in a way it was like you both were having a new experience together. Missandei liked to think of it that way. You both took a long bath together first, full of playful touches and deep kisses, before helping each other dry off and heading to your warm bed. Missandei liked holding you close so she could feel your heartbeat together with her’s, and when she touched between your legs, she loved how eager and sensitive you were. She thought your orgasm was the loveliest thing, the way you moaned and gasped, and she’d ask nicely before using her tongue to give you another. You wanted to do the same things to her, although she wouldn’t pressure you, and you thought it was cute how much she touched and patted your hair as she got closer to her own orgasm.

TYWIN LANNISTER

Having wanted you for some time, Tywin had already thought of how to make you comfortable. As he removed your wedding dress, he’d run his hands along your sides and down your back, occasionally kissing your neck and shoulder to make you shiver. Once you were bare before him, he’d stroke your thighs and kiss your breasts, then slip a hand between your legs. His fingers would stroke slowly and firmly, making you arch your back and hold onto him. The whole time, Tywin would admire your flushed cheeks and bright eyes, but he’d say nothing as you came undone in his arms. Once you’d caught your breath, he’d squeeze your hips and take you with a pace that was just as steady, but deep enough to draw several moans from you. It was slow enough not to hurt, but you could still feel every inch. The closer you were to another orgasm, the more he’d pick up the pace and encourage you to keep saying his name.

TYRION LANNISTER

He loved you with all his heart, and he still felt like it was a dream that a kind, beautiful girl like you still wanted to be with him. He’d long decided that he would spoil you rotten. Tyrion took his time undressing you, praising your sweetness all the while, planting kisses on all his favorite places, which was most of your body. He’d still want to make you laugh, because he just loved that smile, but once he began touching you he wanted your moans instead. He’d touch and lick you with confidence, curious to what you would like best. He’d want to be in you as soon as you came down from your first orgasm, but he had the sense of mind to hand you a drink and ask how you were doing. After a shower of more kisses, he’d part your legs again and lose himself in how sweet and warm you felt. He’d still touch you, over sensitive or not, wanting you to come around his cock.

JAIME LANNISTER

Jaime thought you were joking at first, he’d seen so many suitors after you, he was sure you’d had your pick before you two were together. He was cocky, insisting that he’d spoil any other man for you, and you just scoffed and pulled him into a deep kiss. As he began undressing you and relishing in the gasps you’d make when he squeezed you, Jaime started to become quieter. He noticed how you’d look at him with such anticipation - no, love - and how his touches made you shiver. It was new and exhilarating, but a strange, protective feeling came over him. He pulled you into his arms as he touched between your legs, whispering all sorts of sweet and filthy things at once. He had a sudden urge to come with you, so he’d eased himself inside and held you possessively until you two cried out together.

SANDOR CLEGANE

It made him damned nervous. In fact, he was probably more nervous that you - you actually wanted him, you held his face and kissed him with such affection that it was frightening. You reassured him it’s what you wanted, and as much as he grappled with it, he was already greedily pulling at your dress and dragging you to bed. The more you touched him so tenderly and became needier for kisses, the more possessive he became. He squeezed your ass tightly as he bit at your neck, wanting to leave bruises and hickeys, loving to hear how breathless you were. He loved stretching you out with his calloused fingers, feeling how you’d clench against him and slick his palm up. He didn’t want to admit to himself how much he loved hearing you cry out his name as you came. He wanted you in his lap when he thrust into you, wanting to really hold you close, as if you’d leave at any second.

BRONN OF BLACKWATER

Bronn already knew you didn’t have much experience in this department, and he never faulted you for it. If anything, he tried not to think about how much he liked the idea of “teaching” you a few things. When you teased him about just such a thing, he couldn’t believe his luck, and gladly went to your chambers. He admired your stubbornness and gave you all sorts of dirty praises as he slowly undressed you. Bronn took his time, teasing and edging you, laughing when you told him to hurry up. Groping your ass and licking up your wetness was fun, but surprised himself at how much he wanted to be in you. He let you hold him close, thinking the way you nuzzled into his neck was cute, and relished the breathless gasps you gave as he began thrusting in and out.

PETYR BAELISH

You knew he would take care of you, because he always treated you with such sweetness, but you hadn’t expected it to happen this quickly. He was just in such a romantic mood, wanting to shower you with gifts and touches, and you could see the eagerness in his eyes when he asked if you were comfortable to let him go further. Petyr removed your clothes swiftly, but he was quick to touch and reassure you, giving you loving kisses and gladly leaving hickeys behind on your neck and shoulders. As he’d touch between your legs and bring you to orgasm, his sweet words would become dirty praise, asking if you liked what he did to you and how much you wanted him. He didn’t quiet himself once he was finally inside you, quickly becoming possessive as he kept you in place and almost begged you to moan louder for him.

STANNIS BARATHEON

He expected this sort of thing, but seeing you on the bed in your lovely wedding gown was affecting the stern man more than he wanted to admit. His eyes kept taking in your shoulders, your lips, the way the dress hugged your legs, and before long he was helping you wiggle out of it. You knew that he wanted to touch you, and you had to reassure him that you wanted him to. It was enough to make Stannis’ cheeks turn a little pink. He lost himself in your warmth, allowing himself to relax, and you felt safe in his surprisingly strong grip. You didn’t expect how carefully he held you, or the soft apology he gave as he slowly thrust in you. You gladly gave yourself over to the new and pleasurable sensations. Afterward, Stannis was unsure how to process these new feelings and thoughts, but he offered to draw you a bath and made sure you were comfortable in bed afterward, quietly asking if he could do anything else for you. You liked the gentleness in his voice as he said this, and he was just as attentive in the morning.

DAVOS SEAWORTH

As you kissed him firmly and brought him close to you, Davos quietly asked if you were sure you wanted to be with him. He was still concerned about the status difference between you, never mind the age gap. When you’d firmly press yourself against him and reassure him of your love, he’d melt and find himself unable to deny you anything. He’d shower you with plenty of affection as the two of you removed your clothes, and before long Davos became lost in the warmth and softness of your body. He knew just how to finger you and stroke you while kissing your neck and chest, and relished in the way you held him closer and begged for him. As you’d come down from your orgasm, he’d pull you into his lap and murmur how much he wanted you. He’d start out at a slow and steady pace for you, only going faster once he was sure you were comfortable. Afterward, he’d be nothing but doting and loving, tucking you in bed and letting you snuggle into him all you wanted.

MARGAERY TYRELL

She wouldn’t tease you at all for being mostly inexperienced, because she didn’t have much herself. Margaery knew the things she liked, however, and she wanted to try lots of things she heard about with you. You laughed at the mischievous glint she had in her eyes as she gently laid you down. Her kisses were full and loving, although her hands were snaking under your dress. She was matter of fact with her compliments, loving the feeling of your breasts in her hands and the warmth of your thighs as her fingers ran along them. She started to touch you with her fingers, but before long her curiosity was too much and she wanted to use her tongue. Margaery loved how you moaned her name as you came, and you realized you were at her mercy as she kept stroking and touching you. Margaery gave you a sweet kiss to your brow when she finished, trying not to grin at how flushed and breathless you were.

BRYNDEN TULLY

He admitted he wasn’t so sure at first, wondering if a lady such as yourself should be with an old knight like him in the first place. Still, your insistence would warm his heart and he knew he had to spoil his girl rotten. He’d teasingly ask how you’d like it as he thrust his fingers in and out, coating them in your wetness once you finished. Brynden would assure you that you didn’t have to go any farther if you weren’t comfortable, and when you told him you were ready, he’d smile warmly. He’d hold you close and enter you carefully, giving you time to relax around this thick size. It wouldn’t take long for him to get lost in your body and thrust a little too quickly; he’d breathlessly apologize and kiss your brow if it hurt too much.

EDMURE TULLY

He was confident through your courtship, sweet through the wedding ceremony and a little flirty through the subsequent feast, but once you two entered the bedroom, Edmure suddenly became a little nervous. It wasn’t new for him, but you were more than special to him, and he didn’t want to disappoint you. He began to pull your dress away and marvel in your beauty, his hands eagerly seeking out the places that made you sigh and shiver. Edmure would insist you tell him if it hurt too much while he was inside you. As you’d wrapped your arms around him, he’d give you plenty of kisses and thrust at a steady pace that filled you up and made you shudder. He’d stop now and again to touch you, and he’d definitely want you to come first.

BRIENNE OF TARTH

Brienne thought she would be nervous when this time came, perhaps even fearful. She hated thinking about it before, after all. She hardly had experience, but she knew her feelings. She knew she loved and trusted you, and you thought the same of her. It was a comforting thought as you both rested in each other’s arms, your kisses and touches naturally becoming something more. It just felt right as she slid your nightgown down and you began to untie her loose shirt. She loved your reassuring smile, and how those lips quivered when she explored your body. Brienne didn’t think she was any good with flowery words, so she spoke honestly, praising your beauty and kindness. She hadn’t ever imagined how you might come, but now that she’d seen it, she was sure whatever she could’ve thought wouldn’t measure up. You two enjoyed each other’s embraces and company, eventually falling asleep snuggled up together.

RAMSAY BOLTON

He was absolutely delighted that you hadn’t been touched before, or at least, you’d never gone this far with anyone else. He’d say as much as he’d undress you, praising you for being “his” and letting him have this “present”. Ramsay would be quick to toss the clothes aside and take your body in his hands. He’d eagerly squeeze every bit as he’d leave hickeys all over your neck and breasts. He’d actually spend quite a bit of time marking you up and groping you, only stopping briefly to remove some of his clothes. He’d grasp your hips and lick you hard and fast, making you come too quickly, then he’d keep at it to give you another one and turn you into a whimpering mess. The transition to his cock would be swift, which would make you cry out, but he’d thrust slowly after that. He’d want to take in every expression you made, relishing in it, asking if you were pleased and if you wanted him to go faster.

ROOSE BOLTON

To say he was pleased about this was an understatement. You could absolutely tell by the glint in his eyes when you told him. You teased Roose to be gentle, and you wondered what he had in mind when he pulled you toward him. He’d leave love bites up your neck and chest while fingering you, wanting to hear you shudder and feel you clenching around his fingers. He’d want you to be louder as you came, but if you were quieter, it’d be a charming surprise. As he’d pull you to him and finally thrust inside you, he’d immediately have a feeling of possessiveness and would hold you tight as he thrusted inside you. Roose wouldn’t want to intentionally hurt you, but he’d enjoy the slight gasps and little whines his harder thrusts would give you. Afterward he surprised you with how he wanted to draw you a hot bath - even wanting to bathe you himself - and how he already had clean sheets and a comfortable fur ready.

OBERYN MARTELL

Oberyn had suspected you hadn’t been with someone before, not that he faulted you for it at all. He was open about your comfort and boundaries, and when you were ready, he promised he’d make it special. Oberyn planned to spoil you, because you deserved the best. In a hot bath he’d massage your legs and kiss your neck, biting at your ear as he playfully asked if he could touch you. He’d stroke you and leave hickeys on your neck, only letting you come once you said his name several times. He’d want to dry you off and wrap you in one of his silk robes, before picking you up and whisking you away to the bedroom. Oberyn would kiss from your ankles to your legs, wanting to taste you and overstimulate you, and only then would he pull you into his lap and grind his length against your wet core. As he entered you, he’d have plenty of praise and guidance, telling you how to move your hips to be more comfortable and asking what you’d like him to do. He’d be so proud of you as you’d become more confident, and he wouldn’t let himself finish until you were fully satisfied again.

BERIC DONDARRION

As much as he loved to cling to you and spend several evenings showering you in kisses, he’d always told you that he’d wait if you weren’t comfortable with going further. He was happy you trusted him and wanted him for your first experience; you could tell from his grin. Beric would pull out all the stops; showering you in kisses while he touched your body through your clothes, then slowly undressing you and kissing all the skin he exposed. He’d whisper praise after praise, telling you how beautiful you are, grinning at how flustered you’d become. He’d keep murmuring sweet words as he’d finger you and stroke you, loving how you’d cling to him and rock against his fingers. Once you came, he’d eagerly lick you clean and again ask if you were ready. He’d enter you carefully, letting you feel every inch and wanting to hold you close. Beric would keep his slow and steady pace, breathless as he was, and only speeding up if you “asked sweetly”.

GENDRY

He blushed to his ears when you told him you’d haven't actually been with anyone before. He hadn’t, either, but he was so sure a wonderful girl like you deserved something better than the small room you both stole away in. Your kiss reassured him, though, and he asked that you tell him if he did something you didn’t like. Once you both began to undress and explore each other’s bodies, he grew in confidence, only spurred on by your hands running down his chest and arms. He’d touch and feel how wet you were, and with your encouragement, would stroke you with his rough hands until you came. He’d love sinking into you with his cock, almost losing himself right there. He’d hold you tightly and protectively as he thrusted into you, sighing your name as he kept pace.

#game of thrones imagines #game of thrones x reader #game of thrones #got imagines #got x reader #AIGHT ITS 11 LETS PLAY ANIMAL CROSSING BOIIII

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roses-foxes · 5 years

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No one:

Not a single soul:

Me: But like........ if Jaime was going back to Cersei to die with her, why did he need to be convinced by Tyrion for, like, 10 cursed minutes of screentime? Why did he even bother fighting Euron, instead of going straight to her, because that squid wasn’t even a real threat at all, he could have easily just left that pirate in that creek and let him die by the hands of Dany’s army or dragon fire? And why did he sleep with Brienne before leaving? Because if he really had a ‘oh no’ moment right after, why did he ever plan on staying with her in WF while everybody else was off to kill his twin instea of leaving right away? Why did he only leave when he heard she was winning? Why did we have a 5 minutes dialogue of Tyrion saying he was happy Jaime was happy with Brienne if we were supposed to understand he wasn’t really happy? What was the point of Bronn being sent to kill the Lannibros if it was just for the both of them to defend Cersei’s ass in the end? Why was that Bronn storyline even a thing when it’s not even mentioned or used at all later? What was the point of the twin swords? Where is Widow’s Wail? What did they do with Cersei and Jaime’s bodies? Did they keep Jaime’s hand? What was the point of The Bang That Was Promised? Who has Casterly Rock and the Westerlands at the end of the show, because Tyrion is the only Lannister still alive but he’s the hand of the king? What was the point of mentioning Brienne was the heir to Tarth? Why does nobody seems to GAF about what happens when Selwyn dies, since Brienne is LC? What was the point of hearteyes feast? What was the point of Tommen relieving him from the Kingsguard, making him the heir to Casterly Rock? What was the point of spending CGI money on the Tarth hearteyes scene? What was the point of Jaime coming North at all? What was the point of Jaime apologising to Bran? What was the point of Bran not telling everyone that he’s the one who crippled him? What was the point of the scene between Jon and Jaime in season 1? What was the point of Jaime being the Kingslayer? What was the point of him getting captured by Robb Stark? What was the point of him losing his hand? What was the point of him leaving Cersei at the end of season 7 when he could have stayed in KL and season 8 would have been the exact same, minus Brienne getting her heart broken in the middle of the night, freezing her ass off in a housecoat?

W H A T W A S T H E P O I N T

#i'm losing my goddamn mind you guys #how can anyone defend this season and jaime's *arc* it really baffles me #jaime lannister #got #braime #jaime x brienne

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wolfqueen-is-here · 4 years

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Rating ASoIaF POVs

Don’t come at me, these are my personal likes and dislikes (also I’m bored and I had a bizarre fandom encounter yesterday which made me almost consider being too old for Tumblr :P).

If you want to give me yours, I’ll be more than happy to read them!

The order is number of chapters in all the books combined, not my personal favourites. To make it more fun, I’ll also rate them in a scale from 1 to 10 (my least favourite POVs to my best-loved ones).

Here we go!

TYRION - 6/10

Even though he’s not my favourite character (and that’s a huge understatement), I enjoy his chapters in both AGoT and ACoK. I feel kind of “whatever” towards his ASoS chapters, but the real deal-breaker are those from ADwD. It took me nearly two years to finish that book, simply because whenever I stumbled upon his POV, I went into a coma. For me personally it presents his least likeable portrayal, least insightful journey, least understandable motivations. Moreover, he used to constantly objectify women, while judging them by THEIR potential willingness to overcome their prejudice towards him in order to sleep with him. Like get over yourself, ma boy.

JON - 8/10

He started out as an underdog, his chapters in GoT were kind of boring and whiny, nothing ever happened. But boy oh boy, I can’t get enough of him since he ventured out and started hanging out with the wildlings; and his Lord Commander chapters? Probably my favourite ones in ADwD.

ARYA - 8/10

I preferred her hanging out in Westeros, I feel like crossing the sea slowed down her story a bit. Other than that: great read!

DAENERYS - 8/10

People often complain that her chapters were kind of a bore, but for me it was quite the opposite. For a long time she was our only window into Essos, she’s also quite observant and resourceful, so maybe she’ll help Tyrion’s POV become interesting again once they finally meet.

CATELYN - 10+/10

I ofter say that Sansa’s chapters are my favourite, but if I really had to make a choice, it’d be Cat. Her POV is captivating from the very beginning, and she takes us on such a journey! She’s our first window into the Vale, into Renly’s camp (where we meet Brienne and the Tyrells), into Riverrun and the Twins! We follow Robb through her eyes, we mourn Ned with her... She never stops being an interesting character with an eventful background, thrown into situations we wouldn’t be able to witness, weren’t it for her POV. You may like her, you may dislike her, but I’d say that the importance of her chapters is indisputable.

SANSA - 10/10

What can I say? I like her insight, she’s one of the most observant POV characters in the books (maybe because she doesn’t really have her own agenda - not in a bad way, she’s a child and a captive), which makes her less self-absorbed (especially in the later chapters). Yes, her first chapters in AGoT were a bit dull, and that’s why I’d choose Cat’s POV over hers in general.

BRAN - 7/10

I know it’s the weirdest thing to say about one of the most supernatural POVs, but I kinda preferred his Winterfell chapters? He proved to be a great leader (and I’m sure he will be a good king), but some of his later chapters blurred for me into a tight knot of “I’m going north, but sometimes I warg into Summer and hunt”. I hope we explore more of his abilities in TWoW, that’s something I’m really looking forward to despite not being particularly captivated by the deep north’s charms.

JAIME - 8/10

Entertaining, insightful, arrogant - and I’m talking about both Jaime Lannister and his POV chapters. He’s an arsehole with a terrific backstory, but also a walking disaster of a character. Pure joy. The only thing I regret is getting his POV so late in the books. I know it’d ruin suspense otherwise, but still.

EDDARD - 9/10

I love going back to AGoT and reading his chapters, pretending that I don’t know how things end for him. There are so many “main hero” tropes in his chapters, it makes me laugh. Oh well, it was great when it lasted!

THEON - 6/10

HATED his ACoK chapters, LOVED the ones from ADwD. I know that writing him as a dick was crucial to making his further story more heartbreaking, but I generally can’t enjoy vulgarity, objectifying women, describing characters having sex for 15 pages etc. That’s why I hate many Tyrion’s chapters, and that’s why Theon’s POV annoyed me at first. But damn, his inner struggle, his identity crisis, going back and forth from Reek to Theon... 10/10.

DAVOS - 6/10

Ah, good uncle Davos! I don’t know why I’m not rating him a bit higher, I do enjoy his chapters, especially because it’s through him that we learn more about Stannis and Melisandre in the earlier books. But... he’s such a boring character! :D (I know, I will have to whip myself later for writing this, feel free to send me strongly worded letters, I deserve it.) Davos’s POV works great as an exposition, but I just cannot force myself to care about him personally. Good dude, though.

CERSEI - 9/10

My queen, one and only. I think ASoS might be my favourite book, and that’s mostly because of her chapters. She’s vindictive, egoistic, jealous, unreasonable... and irreplaceable! I enjoy her slightly mellowed-down, cool-headed show version (one of the very few things that the show did right), but gosh, book!Cersei’s weak-arse schemes might be the most wholesome piece of literature, honestly. And the fact that her paranoia isn’t unfounded, that some of her frustrations are totally justified - all that makes her a character rather easy to sympathise with. She might not have the most insightful POV, but it’s certainly the most entertaining one!

SAM - 7/10

He’s a good boy, and an attentive character - his chapters are enjoyable, but not yet exhilarating. Looking forward to more Oldtown business to reevaluate.

BRIENNE - 8/10

I’m not even going to explain myself, her journey was the most enjoyable side-quest I’ve ever witnessed. Some people don’t like her chapters, and honestly, that baffles me more than liking Tyrion’s ADwD POV. :D

BARRISTAN - 4/10

For a famous white cloak, he really felt like a non-character to me. His POV was a-okay, but to be perfectly honest I was constantly paging through his chapters to check whether maybe Dany came back.

VICTARION - 4/10

I’m not a Greyjoy-stan and I probably can’t appreciate the nuance of some Greyjoy POVs, but both Victarion and Aeron read kind of flat. Don’t hate me.

ARIANNE - 8/10

I still don’t get how she was omitted from the show. Maybe she doesn’t become the Queen of the Seven Kingdoms, but so many pointless characters from the books got shitloads of screen-time, and my girl Arianne got none? Are you serious? Freaking BRONN became the Master of Coin, and they decided Arianne shouldn’t exist?! And yes, I love even the almost universally hated “The Princess in the Tower” chapter.

ASHA - 7/10

She’d be higher, but there’s a lot of vulgarity in her chapters, too, and I basically don’t care for that At All. Otherwise she’s a dope character and deserves the Iron Islands.

QUENTYN - 6/10

No offence to homie, but he was a bit of a bore. A nice one, but a bore.

AERON - 4/10

See: VICTARION. He’d get even less, but at least we could experience the Iron Islands through his POV.

AREO - 8/10

I don’t see how any Dornish POV (as in being IN Dorne, not being FROM Dorne like Quentyn) could get any less than 7 points. I still think we got too few Dornish POVs, I demand amends!

JONCON - 8/10

I don’t even care about the plot (although he was one of the only two insights into Aegon’s storyline, that should count for something), I can’t with the amount of gayness in his Rhaegar flashbacks. 8/10, would recommend.

ARYS - 7/10

He was sweet, a bit naive, but I cannot go lower due to my Dorne principle (see: AREO).

MELISANDRE - 8/10

Surprisingly one of the most wholesome POVs of ADwD, pity it was just this one chapter. What with being a Red Priestess and all, you’d expect her to radiate more... numinous energy, but her chapter was one of the most iconic ones. I won’t give her a 9 just because I only have Ned and Cersei with those grades at the moment, and I think it should stay that way. (Oi, Ned/Cersei anyone?)

Prologues and epilogues not included.

What a trip. Care to share your favs? ;)

#asoiaf #got #game of thrones #pov characters #house stark #house lannister #dorne #having fun #rating chapters #i'm rereading the books #asoiaf women #women rule

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castieltrash1 · 4 years

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who i write for ↴

italicized are faves + *request by request basis due to age

supernatural: sam, dean, castiel, crowley, lucifer, jack*, meg, rowena, gabriel, gadreel

tolkien: kili, fili, thorin, legolas, aragorn, boromir, faramir, haldir, lindir, bard, eomer, thranduil

marvel: steve, bucky, tony, clint, natasha, bruce, stephen, peter p.*, peter q., thor, loki, scott, sam, killmonger, pietro, wanda, gamora, carol, yelena, the eternals, vision, pepper, hope

criminal minds: aaron, spencer, derek, penelope, emily, jj, matt, elle, luke

peaky blinders: thomas, arthur, john, alfie, lizzie, michael, ada, esme, aberama

game of thrones: petyr, tyrion, jaime, daenerys, jon, robb, sansa*, arya*, jorah, theon, sam, gendry, bronn, brienne, margaery, yara, podrick, jaqen, melisandre, grey worm, missandei, tormund, daario, oberyn, edd, edmure

law and order svu: liv, elliot, munch, fin, cassidy, monique, melinda, nick, mike, alex, casey, rafael, peter, sonny

misc: the batman, divergent, house of wax, connor dbh, jackson rippner, brahms heelshire, scream, jd (heathers), ian mckinley, the lost boys, ray merrimen

retired fandoms (may return): harry potter, the vampire diaries/the originals, borhap/queen, twilight

basic rules ↴

“imagine” requests: any character(s), relationship types, aus, etc. ALL imagine requests will always be written as they’re shorter and easier to complete for me!!

oneshot requests: any character(s), relationship types, aus, etc. these requests are more-so done if i’m inspired. i tend to write LONG oneshots (think 8-15k words) so if you want a more intense plot or story, tell me you’re requesting a oneshot!! just know, i might not always be able to write everything :(

nsfw is allowed (and encouraged tbh im a hoe), requests are gender-neutral unless stated/requested otherwise, and poly relationships or love triangle centered requested are allowed!!

extra reminders ↴

my blog is lgbtq+ inclusive, so please feel free to request things specific to a certain gender/sexuality ♡

i’ll try to stay away from making the reader too specific, but if you want a certain ethnicity/body type/etc. i completely understand!! :D

#guidelines #rules

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theplaguebeast · 4 years

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s5e2

still would like to not be doing this

still unable to actually stop i’ll go insane if i leave this half done

i just. shoot me k? if u love me shoot me

-arya has arrived in braavos whee

-oh no pod n brie found sansa but I KNOW sansa doesn’t go with them SO CLOSE, MY BABY WAS SO CLOSE TO BEING REASONABLY SAFE T_T

-sansy getting sassy at littlefinger yes girl

-man brienne just keeps getting character assassinated by everyone in fkin westeros poor gal

-Jaime ‘i’ll walk my ass to Dorne for my baby girl’ Lannister

-Bronn is actually v sweet to Lollys he’s a nice guy for who he is yanno

-hey anyone else notice the lannisters getting progressively less blonde as the series goes on? like, what the shit?

-Barristan desperately tryin to reign Dany in, gl bro

-ayyy cersei with the bounty on tyrion and the resultant blonde dwarf heads qybrun gets to play with

-oh hey Kevan is still alive u go dude, out here, survivin, not listening to Cersei’s bs, givin her a proper verbal bitchslap!

-hi shireen

-sam is v sweet but makes gilly feel dumb a lot and doesn’t seem to understand that

-stannis whinging abt lyanna mormont tellin him (p politely) to fuck off

-i’ll give jon this credit he turns stannis right tf down even tho it’s his childhood dream dangled in his face

-i got so little, and such shitty sleep last night i’m so tired i hate adhd not letting my sixth cup of coffee actually perk me up it just makes my suffering slightly less

-Thorne acting like mercy killing a man was a bad thing

-Lord Snow

-Arya’s hunting pigeons again lol

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argentvive · 5 years

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Destroying the Iron Throne

One of my predictions for Season 8 of Game of Thrones was the destruction of the Iron Throne. And we got that.

Somewhere along the line GRRM must have told D&D that the Iron Throne would be incinerated. It makes a great spectacle, so of course they went along.

But it doesn’t seem like he told them exactly how and why this would happen, because there’s no explanation on the show for Drogon’s action. Why did he do it?

There are certainly some inventive theories out there that Drogon was acting symbolically--instead of barbecuing Daenerys’ actual killer, Jon, he smelted the metaphorical source of her “madness.” But does Drogon think symbolically? Has he ever shown such an inclination? Does he even disapprove of her burning KL--he’s the one who actually rained down fire, after all. If he disapproved, he could have just said no. Imputing a symbolic motive to Drogon for burning the IT is anthropomorphizing him already--why not give him some agency along with it? Nonsensical, I agree.

I’m pretty sure we’re not getting a Drogon POV chapter in the final book. We’ll never know why he destroyed the key symbol of rule in the Seven Kingdoms, the central focus of the “game of thrones.” Which leads me to think that this will not be the exact way the Iron Throne will be destroyed in ASOIAF.

I do believe it will be destroyed, perhaps even by Drogon, but not in this way.

One of the basic tenets of alchemy is the doctrine of correspondences. Part of that doctrine is that each of the seven heavenly bodies corresponds to one of the seven metals. The supreme heavenly body is the Sun, which corresponds to gold; the next highest is the Moon, which corresponds to silver. The fifth is Mars, which corresponds to iron. GRRM made a deliberate choice in creating an iron throne for Westeros.

As Lyndy Abraham explains, “the reign of Mars is associated with the stage [of the alchemical process] when the rainbow colours of the peacock’s tail...appear in the vessel, heralding the advent of the white stage.” (Abraham, p. 122)

Among Solomon Trismosin’s Splendor Solis series of alchemical illustrations, seven are devoted to showing the seven heavenly bodies/metals. Here is the one for Mars/iron.

At the top, Mars rides in his chariot drawn by two wolves. At the center, in the flask, is a three-headed white bird, signifying the coming albedo. The rest of the image shows scenes of war and plunder, appropriate for Mars, who was the Roman god of war. I found an excellent description at this psychological alchemy site: https://mythcrafts.com/2017/04/09/splendor-solis-plate-14/

Below the cucurbit there is a confrontation between knights and peasants. The knights have horses and weaponry, and are crushing the peasants, many of whose dead bodies lay trampled beneath them. Yet the peasants still fight back, raising their pitchforks and tools in acts of defiance. Above them on the right there are scenes of men and women being chased from their homes and beaten, and above them, other homes on fire. The left-hand side shows the knights taking the spoils of war, driving off herds of cattle and sheep and cutting down trees, taking all that the peasants have worked so hard for.

That sounds like a lot of scenes during the War of the Five Kings and after, doesn’t it?

Iron is a base metal; iron/Mars means unending war. The Iron Throne must be destroyed if there is to be any chance of peace and harmony. But the destruction should be intentional, not the random act of a dragon. The warring factions and their leaders have to abandon the “game of thrones,” have to choose to rule themselves a different way.

In the end, the destruction of the Iron Throne on the show was meaningless. Bran just sits in a different chair (briefly), and gives over actual governance to Tyrion and a Small Council that looked just like the old Small Councils, except now with Bronn and his concern about reopening the brothels.

So yeah, the conclusion was deeply unsatisfying. The wheel was not broken. Nothing changed, but thousands upon thousands died.

(The one possible ray of light is Yara’s rule in the Iron Islands. Will she keep her promise to Daenerys to forswear the “iron way,” to stop rape and pillage? Who knows? )

#game of thrones #iron throne #drogon #splendor solis #daenerys targaryen #bran stark #alchemy #mars #iron islands #yara greyjoy #tyrion lannister #a song of ice and fire #anti-got #300th post

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janiedean · 3 years

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... the tyrion/sansa hairdresser/mortician au no one was expecting but happened

well @meri-vaahtoaa I TOLD YOU IT WAS GONNA HAPPEN TODAY AND IT HAPPENED, have a for now untitled tyrion/sansa mortician/hairdresser au inspired by this post with bonus guest star jeyne p. u___u don't look for angst, also extremely background mentioned jb plus jaime & bronn being themselves in the backstory, have fun u__u

This fucking teaches me to be drunk around both my brother and Bronn, Tyrion thinks for the umpteenth time as he keeps on walking - he needs a damned salon and he needs it now but he also had to get out of the neighborhood because like hell he’s going to risk running into anyone who knows his father. That’s the… least thing he needs, honestly, as if his life choices aren’t already something he has to fight for every other moment and he can’t fucking wait to be out of the house, which should be soon -

If he doesn’t get thrown out of his internship because of his horrible drunk choices.

Why did they have drinks together, why did they have drunk bets, why did he bet with Jaime that he would dye his hair bright blue if he stopped beating around the bush and confessed to the bartender that he’s been into her since they started coming to that specific place for drinks because he chickened out of it for months, except -

Except Jaime went and did it and it turned out that she actually had been looking back and Tyrion hadn’t been wrong in that assessment, but then he had to do it and he actually went and used a do it yourself dye and -

Well.

He honestly can’t go and start his apprenticeship with blue hair that’s also… well, not even professionally dyed, and considering the arguments that it created the least thing he needs is going somewhere he’d be recognized.

So, he’s plenty out of the neighborhood, but he hasn’t found someplace that felt… well, not extra fancy. The second-least thing he needs is extra fancy shops where people would send looks his way that he could absolutely do without.

Also, it’s fucking hot. Why did he do that in the middle of summer again? And why couldn’t he have bet something more reasonable - right, it was Bronn’s idea and they were drunk. Fuck.

He walks a bit more, wondering if maybe he should sit down and check on Google Maps if he’s ended up in the only area of the city that doesn’t have any, and then he sees one on the other side of the road - fine, he stopped because he wondered who names a hair salon Beauty and the Beast, but it costs nothing to have a look from the outside, right?

He crosses the street and walks up to the door.

First thing, the pricing list outside it looks… well, it’s not cheap, but it’s certainly not the ridiculous fares they ask where his sister goes to have her hair done, which is exceedingly good since he doesn’t want to spend a salary’s worth of an average office employee to get that blue crap out of his hair. He looks through the glass door - there is just one woman inside getting her hair done, which is also good because the least people around the shorter the wait, it certainly does look clean and while the pastel aesthetic is maybe a bit too much for his tastes - everything is a pastel shade, from the light yellow on the floor to the pale pink and violet of the chairs and the powder blue of the walls… well, beggars can’t be choosers when it comes to it, and the woman on the chair is chatting amicably with the chestnut-haired girl doing her hair and doesn’t look like she hates being there or like she chose the wrong shop.

Also, it’s two PM and he knows this is going to take long. He can hardly afford to fuck around much longer.

He pushes the door open and walks into the shop.

“Welcome!” The chestnut-haired girl says, giving him a nice smile. “Sorry if I don’t come over, but if you sit for a minute my colleague will be back from her coffee break shortly.”

“Sure,” he says, “no hurry,” and he goes sitting on one of the pale violet chairs on the side - they’re comfortable, at least, and he considers taking out the book he brought with to pass the time, but then -

“Hello and welcome! Can I get you a glass of water” Someone else chirps from his side, and right, he did hear the door open -

Oh.

“Hi,” he blurts, staring into a pair of lovely blue eyes belonging to supposedly the other girl working here - she has long auburn hair styled in a french braid and is wearing a blue summer dress that pairs with her eyes perfectly and she’s smiling down at him as if she’s not horrified by his horrid dye-job, or by his presence in the first place, which is his general experience in this kind of shops, so - that’s good, at least. “And uh, thanks,” he says, realizing he is thirsty.

“Be right back! Sorry, I was taking my break but we have no appointments today, so I’ll be on your case very soon.”

She goes to the corner of the room and grabs a glass of water from a dispenser, then brings it to him - shit, he needed it.

“So, what can I do for you?”

“Er,” he says, “I dyed that hair for a bet but I was called for an internship yesterday, and I start on Monday, so… I need a removal. If it’s possible.”

The girl leans closer, taking a good look at his hair.

“Hm,” she says, “it might take a while, but I think it’s possible. It’s not a very good dye job, if I can say so.”

He snorts. “Oh, you can. Please, I did it and I have regretted it every moment since.”

“Well,” she nods, “you’re lucky that most likely no one will show up for anything complicated today then. Jeyne, can you handle other customers in case?”

“Sure,” the chestnut-haired girl replies. “As if I don’t know you’ll have the time of your life.”

She rolls her eyes, then goes to a wardrobe in the corner and finds him a towel, tucks it around his neck and lowers a chair near the small sinks at the bottom of the shop so he can sit on it - he does, feeling extremely thankful that it’s extremely comfortable leather, and he can hear her tutting about bad dyes under her breath as she washes his hair once, twice, thrice, and her fingers feel really good on his scalp but he’s not going to think about that now.

“Just for the record,” she asks as she rinses it, “do you just want the dye to go away or do you want a cut, too?”

“Hell,” he says, “I need to look presentable. I suppose the cut can’t hurt.”

“Will do,” she chirps again, “and by the way, never use that kind of dye again. Not with hair this nice.”

Tyrion would have toppled off the chair if his head wasn’t thrown too far back for it to happen.

“I have nice hair now?”

“You can feel it,” she replies, “under all this… this,” she says, shaking her head.

“I know,” he says, “bad choices.”

“Extremely,” she goes on, rinsing. “But don’t you worry. I’ll have it fixed.”

“Really,” chestnut-haired girl says, “Sansa is a pro with that kind of thing. You’re in good hands.”

Oh. So her name is Sansa. It’s pretty, he thinks.

“Well,” he says, “I can’t wait to see how you manage it. I’m Tyrion, by the way. Figures you should know if I know yours?”

“Oh, absolutely,” she goes on, and gives his hair a last rinse. “Right, can you move forward?” He does and she dries his hair with the towel, then goes to find a mantel that somehow he doesn’t drown in. “Please,” she says, “on whichever free chair you prefer.”

He picks an empty one two spots away from Jeyne and the other woman and lowers it so he can sit down, and then Sansa raises it up again until his still sadly blue head is at the right height.

“Hm,” she says, grabbing a lock and feeling it between her fingers, “from what I see here you’re a natural blonde?”

“Sort of,” he shrugs. He is - his hair isn’t as golden as his siblings’, but it definitely is on that shade. Not that he ever bothered to look into it. “Wait,” he says, fishing into his pocket, and then he grabs his phone and shows her a picture Bronn took of him and Jaime during Tyrion’s latest birthday party which is about the only one of his he’s kept there where you can see his actual color very well. She takes it, squints, zooms on his head, then nods and hands him back the phone.

“Well,” she says, “we’re going to have to use a color remover to take out the blue pigment, then apply some more pigment to allow for the proteins in the hair to adhere to it. Then… yeah, possibly mix a few different types of toners to reach the goal of your natural hair color, and it’s going to take a while, but we should get there. Nothing that terrible.”

“Er,” he blurts, “how much chemistry did you have to study to get there?”

She smiles a bit wider.

“Yeah, I know, but some people don’t like if we talk like that. It makes it sound complicated, I’m told.”

“Not at all,” he says, waiting as Jeyne, who has finished the other woman’s hair, goes to the back room to presumably get Sansa at least the color remover, “not like it’s not… sort of my thing, too,” he says, and then he bites his own tongue - why did he ever do that, now she’s going to decide he’s a creep or something -

“Really,” she says as Jeyne comes back and hands her the remover, “do lean your head back. And what it is that you do?”

He takes a deep breath and tells her.

—

“Oh, so you’re a mortician?” Sansa says happily as she keeps on applying the remover to his hair, her fingers pressing along his scalp as she rubs it in. To her credit, she doesn’t sound like she thinks it’s creepy.

“Well, apprentice,” he shrugs, “but yeah, working on it. And starting an internship soon. Where I can’t… look like this. But yes. Just going through my degree - I had a final a couple days ago. Fuck, it was so embarrassing.”

“Did they judge your hair?”

“Called it apocalyptic, but I aced it.”

“Nice. What was it about?”

“Embalming, mostly,” he sighs. “All the chemistry about formadelhyde I had to learn.”

“Fun fact,” Sansa grins, “do you know they use it in clothing?”

… He somehow had not known that.

“What? Really? They forgot to cover that part.”

“Well,” Sansa says, “I used to crash fashion school lessons, my brother’s boyfriend snuck me in. I learned a lot. I think it’s because of the preserving qualities, though I’m sure it wasn’t… all of it.”

“I mean,” Tyrion blurts, “it’s a preservative but it’s also a disinfectant. Destroys bacteria and their food supply, and it’s a dehydrator, there’s a reason why we use it that much.”

“Hm,” Sansa nods, starting to put aluminium stripes on his hair - fuck, he looks ridiculous like this, “one wonders why you don’t just use alcohol then? Because I thought it was kind of carcinogen.”

Well, she did listen to those lessons for sure.

“It’s cheaper,” Tyrion sighs, “a lot cheaper. It cuts costs. Guess I’ll resign myself to the cancer risk.”

She snorts. “Please,” she says, keeping on placing those stripes carefully, “I’m pretty sure that’s exaggerating a bit. There, they should rest for half an hour. I have to place a few calls now but if you want to read while I’m at it feel free to, just don’t move your head around too much.”

“Roger that,” Tyrion nods, and settles back in the chair.

He has a feeling it’s going to be long, but at least she’s very good company. Jeyne looks about to say something but then another woman comes in the shop and she goes to greet her, and Tyrion goes back to his Chinese sci-fi book that he’s really enjoying and hopes that at the end of it he doesn’t have to shave his head because that dye was that bad.

—

Half an hour later, after washing away the remover, Sansa has moved on to applying the first round of pigment to his hair - the blue did go out, but it still looks…. well. Bad. He can see it just looking at it in the mirror.

“So, she says, “is your internship at a funeral home?”

“Yes,” he replies, “it’s during the last six months of the degree, then you write your thesis and you get your license, and honestly, it’s a nice funeral home. I hope they hire me for good. Anyway, it makes sense. We need to have… experiences with, uh, cases, you know, uh -“

“You can say bodies,” Sansa grins brightly, “it’s fine. I know what you do in funeral homes.”

“Oh, thank God,” he blurts. “I’m sorry, uh, people tend to get queasy when I mention them. The bodies, I mean.”

“That sounds nonsensical,” Sansa shrugs, “what do people think happens when they die? Anyway, you can absolutely say that. Hm, here we go, I think these can stay. Another… yeah. Half-hour, forty-five minutes? Get yourself comfortable. I’ll go mix those toners meanwhile.”

Oh. Right. The toners. Fuck, he can’t wait for this entire dye business to be over. Honestly, he hasn’t done that when he was fifteen, he should have stuck with it.

He grabs his book back and starts reading it again, except that he finds himself wishing he could chat with Sansa some more and he needs to get that thought out of his head right now, no reason to set himself up for failure.

He reads on.

—

Later, she’s washed his hair again and she’s still mixing the toners.

“Yeah,” she says, “I think this need a bit more work, but I’m curious. Is there anything you don’t like about your school? Because you sounded really excited before.”

Did I, Tyrion thinks, but then again… he almost never talks about it to anyone except Jaime or Bronn because everyone else thinks it’s morbid, and somehow this girl who owns a wholly pastel shop actually seems to enjoy discussing the topic, so why the hell not?

“I mean,” he says, “I think we should do autopsies.”

“Oh, you don’t? I’d have expected it.”

“Eh,” he shrugs, “me too, and I think we should for, you know, completion and so on, but we don’t, so I guess I’ll read up on it.”

“But,” she says, “hypothetically,” and she’s kind of smiling slyly, what, “let’s say that someone wakes up while embalming them. What do you do then?”

“I mean,” Tyrion replies, slowly, “I think there’s a pretty huge difference between a living body and a dead one?”

“Sansa, please,” Jeyne says as she combs through the hair of the other woman, who looks… a tiny bit disturbed, but neither Jeyne nor Sansa are, so… who cares. right?, “never mind that you need a bit more toner, but I think there’s a thing named rigor mortis that’d make it pretty fucking obvious.”

“That,” Tyrion replies, “also if one gets stuck in a fridge for a few days I think you’d be dead anyway. Not to be, you know, morbid.”

Sansa mixes a bit more toner and smiles wider. Right. She was so fucking with him. “I mean, you did pump them full of carcinogen just before, right?”

“Right,” he laughs as she tells him to lean back and starts applying the toner to his poor roots, “we did, technically.”

“Just stay still,” she goes on, “it’ll be another hour, I think. Then I can cut.”

Well, he decides, at least this entire process is being not overtly miserable.

He leans back and lets her apply the toner and then cover it with the aluminium stripes all over again.

—

“So,” she says later while Jeyne is going through the third client of the day and he’s sitting on the chair again after his hair was thoroughly rinsed and washed for the umpteenth time — he lost count, honestly, but now it does look like his usual shade, sort of, he thinks, “can I ask what was this infamous bet about? Also, I can see your hair is naturally wavy — should I just trim the edges? Because I can see you cut it yourself and it’s not bad but you kind of hacked at them.”

“Er, yes,” he says, “sounds good. Wait, naturally wavy?”

“It is,” she says, “I can recognize it.”

“I, uh,” he coughs, “I don’t think I ever had it long enough to notice?”

“It’s the exact same as your brother’s,” she shrugs, “just a bit darker, but again, this should tide you over for a while. I mean, by the time it wears off whatever travesty you did to your hair in the first place should be fixed and it’ll be as before and no one will notice.”

“Then - I guess you can trim only and I’ll see,” he says, his throat suddenly feeling dry. No one ever compared him to Jaime in that sense without making it… well. About how he’s not the person with the good looks in the family, so this entire thing is just - weird. “Anyway, uh, you can ask about the bet. I mean, it’s just embarrassing.”

“I’m listening,” she says, cutting the edges of his hair slowly, and surely she puts a lot more thought it in than he does while cutting it, but then again… it’s her job and he learned because he didn’t want his father’s barber to go near his head.

“Er, so,” he clears his throat again, trying to figure out how to tell her the sanitized version of it while sparing her from all the family ugliness, “I was out drinking with the brother and the best friend at the same bar we’ve been going to for months because they have good drinks and the brother absolutely had a crush on the bartender, except that he came from a, uh, toxic relationship, let’s put it like that, and I thought he wasn’t going to fess up ever, so - we were drunk and it came out and I said of course I’d dye my hair that horrid color if he fessed up to her and like, I thought he never would but he actually went and did it and — yeah. I mean, glad for him that it went well but not my greatest moment.”

“Aw,” Sansa replies, keeping on trimming, “I like a nice love story. I imagine he doesn’t share our interest in formadelhyde.”

Why does his heart beat a tiny bit faster when she says our interest?

“No,” Tyrion shakes his head, “he’s more into nerding over Middle Ages weapons, but at least he didn’t tell me Six Feet Under was boring, so.”

“I loved that show,” she replies, “who’d say it’s boring?”

“It’s my favorite,” he shrugs a bit as she puts away the scissors. “And a lot of people, but it seems like you have good taste.”

She nods as she grabs some lotion that she supposedly has to pass into his hair before drying it. “And what about you?”

“Sorry?”

“Well, he had a nice love story going into port, so what about you?”

“Er,” he hopes he’s not blushing, fuck, he’s usually not — he doesn’t fluster, fucking hell, “I — really am not looking. My family kind of… fucked up the only serious relationship I had going for me and most people get put off at the whole I want to be a mortician thing, so.”

“What kind of family fucks up relationships for other people?”

“The kind we come from,” he sighs, “but at least he’s out of that circus and I’ll be the moment I graduate.”

“Nice,” Sansa nods, “now just hold on a moment and I’m drying it.”

He nods — she grabs an hair dryer and starts blowing it and yes, he can see she got the exact shade right now that it’s not wet anymore, and — well, of course it’s her job to make it look good but the more she proceeds the nicer it looks, and now he can vaguely see what she meant when she talked about natural curls, and also… it feels fluffier? Lighter? He has no fucking clue, but the moment she’s finished — well.

“Fuck,” he admits, “I don’t think my hair ever looked this nice in my entire life.”

She grins. “I know how to do my job. Another moment.” She sprays some more lotion on her hands and runs it through his hair again. “This was just for a bit of nutriment, but there you are. You know, if you treat it a bit more nicely you might not need it me to make it look good.”

“Yeah, well, and what if I’d like to come back here instead?” He blurts, not knowing what the fuck he’s aiming for, but then she grins back a bit wider.

“I always like making new clients,” she replies, “especially when they’re cute and they don’t only want to talk about the gossip in magazines. That gets boring after a while.”

Wait, did she call him cute?

“Tell you what,” she keeps on as she takes the mantel off him and waits for him to get off the chair and follow her to the counter, “let’s say I don’t give all new clients a ten percent discount but I do give it to the ones I like.”

What the fuck —

“So, here you go.”

She hands him a receipt… with a fifteen per cent discount. “But you have to promise me you won’t use that crap dye anymore. That’s probably more cancer-inducing than formaldehyde could ever be.”

He has to laugh at that.

“Fair,” he says, “I won’t. Maybe I’ll come back before my last final. It’s two weeks from now,” he says, slowly, “I might want to look good for it. As much as it goes, anyway.”

“Oh, I’ll make you look incredible, don’t you worry.” She takes his card, swipes it, hands him the POS. He’s sure he doesn’t let it drop just out of sheer force of will. The payment goes through, she gives him his receipt and he pockets it, his hand still sweating —

“I’ll see you to the door,” she goes on, and she follows him out.

“So, Tyrion,” she grins again, “see you in two weeks?”

“Oh,” he replies, “absolutely.”

“And let me know how the internship thing works out. I like to know what’s up with the clients I like,” she winks, and then she leans down and kisses his cheek before going back into the shop.

Tyrion just stands there dumbfounded and only takes a few steps from the shop, and he didn’t mean to eavesdrop but he hears Jeyne the moment he starts walking away and —

“Sansa, I know you said you’d be forward after that asshole Harry, but I never saw you being that obvious. You really liked our mortician or what?”

“So what?” Sansa replies, and Tyrion thinks he’ll faint. “No point in playing hard to get and all. When he comes back I’m absolutely asking him out for coffee or something. I did like him.”

“Good for you,” Jeyne replies, “he seems nice and you deserve a nice guy. Even if that dye was a really crap choice on his part.”

“Oh, if I have a say in it no bad dye is ever coming near that hair. It was so nice,” she replies, and at that point he leaves because he really shouldn’t be doing this and he will faint, but —

But he smiles to himself all the way home.

He thinks he’s never looked forward to a final that much, and if she does really ask him out for coffee, no way he’s being an idiot and saying no.

And if he’ll brush up on cool embalming facts before then, well, you can’t blame him, right?

End.

#sanrion #tyrion lannister #sansa stark #jeyne poole #sansa x tyrion #those are the tags i suppose???#my fic

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kateofthecanals · 5 years

Text

Finale Quick Thoughts

- Well that was... a thing that happened.

- As I expected, this being an episode written AND directed by D&D, 90% of it was just looooong drawn out shots of people walking or their faces.

- What happened to Arya’s horse and all the cuts on her face??? (I know, I know, that was sooooo Last Episode)

- Bye-bye Dany, Kuhleezy not so mega after all, I guess.

- Tyrion gets to declare Bran king and Westeros a democracy because... creatively it made sense because we wanted it to happen?

- Nice that they brought back Edmure just so he can be publicly disrespected again. Cat would be so proud... ;-P

- HOT SWEETROBIN

- NEW PRINCE OF DORNE, AKA Non-Union Oberyn? Do they only have one outfit among all the guys in Dorne?

- Dany’s story about picturing the Iron Throne being much bigger HAHAHA it’s funny because it’s way more impressive in the books!!!

- This is one of several fuck-you moments to GRRM and the books that D&D graciously wrote into this episode. The most grievous being Sam standing up and offering the most likely outcome of the books and everyone laughing at and mocking him. Stay classly, assholes...

- A SONG OF ICE AND FIRE, well we saw THAT coming, right? The utter NERVE...

- WHY would Bran approve of Bronn as Master of Coin???

- So literally the only point of R+L=J was so Jon could reject Dany sexually and she would go crazy and burn down King’s Landing? Lame story, bro.

- Jon: “Arya, how did you get here??” Arya: “(1) I came to kill the queen. (2) ????? (3) Your queen got to her first.” Wow, left a lot out of that story, Arya. Just as I suspected, Sandor’s words meant NOTHING.

- Yes, yes, Queen In The North. Good_for_her.gif, but it would have been nice if she hadn’t gotten the title by default because Bran became King of Everything and Jon went back to the Wall. But at least she didn’t have to go full Littlefinger to get the position.

- And question: If Westeros is a democracy now, but the North is independent, does that mean the North is STILL a monarchy? And if so, shouldn’t Sansa get married? Thought for sure they’d jimmy in a marriage to Hot Sweetrobin... whatever, Sandor should have been at her side anyway, goddammit.

- And I hated that dress. I hate how she’s all bound up like a Victorian spinster. A literal ice queen. Sigh...

- Someone on Twitter put it best: “They didn’t break the wheel, they just changed a tire.” Seriously, how is this an improvement? If anything, it just makes things worse...? Also, are we supposed to assume that Bran knew Dany would slaughter thousands and he allowed it to happen so he could become king??

- Jaime and Cersei’s bodies FULL IN TACT, as is the Iron Throne, lmaooooo.

- Drogon has consciousness now? He recognizes the Throne and what it represents? Huh?

- Super cool how Jon can abandon Ghost but still get him back in the end anyway. Ghost shoulda bitten his nuts off.

- How is Sam a Grand Maester but also a father and the lord of Horn Hill??

- So Brienne’s big final moment is.... writing a eulogy for Jaime?

- No interaction between Arya and Gendry??

- ETA ON TWOW????

#got spoilers #got season 8 spoilers

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a-libra-writes · 4 years

Note

GOT MEN: Write down things you find attractive about each of them? (I saw this at Underrated Character Imagines and wanted to ask if you could do the same?)

oh, I saw that too!! Khat has good taste 😏 im including some girls bc I am a Giant Bi

Ned: 150% HUSBAND MATERIAL. I love how broody he is. Love his POVs in the book. his love for his family & siblings is 🥺🥺 10/10 would live in domestic bliss with this man, his nice hair and 10 kids.

Robb: idk he’s real cute and honorable and i wanna pinch his cheeks. love his bond w Jon and ofc w Grey Wind is awesome.

Jon: sorry Kit is too baby-faced for me but i really love Jon’s chapters, he’s such a broody considerate sad lil butt, & loyal to his friends!! love his partnership w ghost, the goodest boi

Benjen: THAT VOICE AND FACE AND SMIRK I JUST 1500% 👌👌👌 AND THAT HAIR! damn Starks and their perfect-ass hair. damn his smile and cute nose.

Jory: sweet loyal boy with a perfect smile i will always protecc. JORY NEVER HURT ANYBODY

Edd: i love his dumb face and nose and his personality is great thanks. i think his actor is perf.

Tormund: im not super attracted but hes got a great heart and TREATS HIS WOMEN LIKE QUEENS

Mance: fuckin chaotic-ass bard int he books why did they take away his singing and lute. big sweetie too

Theon: ill be real hes kind of a giant fuckboy and i love Alfie but I dont think he fits Theon well BUT fuckin fantastic character arc 10/10

Yara: pleaSE STEP ON ME I LOVE BADASS PIRATE LADIES SHES SO SASSY AND COOL SFJDSJDFJSD

Jorah: THOSE EYES!! THAT SMILE!! THOSE SAD LINGERING LOOKS FSLDFD I love Jorah sO MUCH 😭😭 This seems silly but i LOVE his whispy blonde hair and the armor+blue/tan outfit he wears a lot, IDK WHY HEsS SO HANDSOME!?

Missandei: gorgeous queen who knows all the languages and is hella wise I love her pretty outfits too

Grey Worm: big ole sweetheart who will also throttle a man and rip out his heart for u. a smile i must protect.

Tywin: first of all charles dance is 💕💕 bc THOSE EYES AND THAT NOSE aND THAT VOICE and i just love dominating assholes who only have a soft spot for a love interest like hes an awful person but we dont judge on this blog ok. also love me some sneaky intrigue characters

Tyrion: just as much sneaky intrigue as Tywin except he actually has a moral compass, also a heart lmao. 10/10 would marry

Jaime: problematic fave bc Nikolaj is a dreamboat. also his devotion to those he loves is really frickin sweet even if its misguided as hell lol. ultimate tsundere, prove me wrong

Sandor: GRUMPY! 👏 BUTTHEAD! 👏 WITH A BIG SOFT SPOT HE DENIES!! 👏👏 also like jorah he has that “lady and knight” trope that im a HUGE sucker for. fuckin handsome-ass giant cant decide if i wanna cuddle or get railed by him

Bronn: he has pretty eyes and i like his voice but that’s moreso the actor lol. Im not super into him but i really like his interactions w Tyrion and his personality

Petyr: not super into him but i really love his manipulative nature and his actor is fuckin A++. say what you want about him but he PLAYS THE LOOOONG GAME you know he’s faithful AF. probs the only legit yandere in GoT lets be real

Stannis: MY ONE TRUE KING AND HUSBAND 😭😭💕💕 I love him soooo much, the show ruined it but his character arc in the books is just SKFKSFK AGH i really love justice-oriented, unyielding & stubborn characters and he has such a big soft spot for Davos and Shireen and he’s such a frickin butthead but also just wants love and has all these insecurities bc of his brothers. I love him. Absolute fav. I really like his actor too, his voice is 💕

Davos: I LOOOOVE LIAM CUNNINGHAM his sweet eyes and voice just fit Davos so well and that beard!! 💖 also great devoted husband and wonderful dad i jsut sfkdkfsl i also want to settle down on a seaside home and have several kiddos or just like 5 dogs with this man. love his relationship w stannis, most iconic duo

Margaery: marg in the books is kinda meehh for me so i really love natalie’s take on her, i love how gorgeous and sassy she is!!! if we dated we’d have unstoppable double femme energy

Brynden: AAaAAAA HES SO TALL AND CUTE AND HIS VOICE AND HE’S A BADASS KNIGHT I JUST SKDFKSDL 💕🐟🐟💕 and he’s so sweet to Cat and just a stubborn butthead to his brother I WILL NOT BE SHAMED FOR MY LOVE OF OLDER MEN

Edmure: idk why he’s an idiot in the show but i really like him in the books haha, he’s just likable? damn tobias menzies is a cutie tho. doesn’t look like my image of edmure but i love his smile!

Brienne: AAAHHH PLZ BE MY KNIGHT AND CARRY ME AND FIGHT IN MY HONOR akfksdkf I adore her idealism and honor, even if it tends to backfire on her, and she’s just wholesome and kind!!! SHE DESERVES THE WORLD!

Ramsay: hes the worst so WHY IS IWAN RHEON SO ATTRACTIVE LIKE?? those eyes?? that fucking smile? hIS cANINES ARE SO PRONOUNCED WHY IS IT CUTE??? damn him. damn him for making ramsay attractive. i am shamed.

Roose: hooooo buddy okay i cant help it, its like tywin all over again except Roose gives off those yandere vibes and his voice is just 💦💦💦 I LOVE THE ACTOR THEY PICKED. I will not apologize for him being a fave lol, id post my writing for him but shaaaaame

Oberyn: so i binged Narcos before GoT and i had no idea Pedro was in this show, lost my shit lol. Ahhh I love the swagger Oberyn has, he’s such a chaotic bi 😆😆 a very passionate man, not my type at all but his stupid charisma makes me swoon anyway

Beric: i love his actor!!! such a big soft sweetie with THE MOST RADIANT SMILE OMG how does he do this. love him!

Gendry: eehh hes too young for me but i love his friendship w Arya and hes a big cute dork in the book.

Edit: no one asked but i think lord commander mormont's actor is p cuuuuute.... 👀 even without his talking bird

#libra says #thanks for asking me to do this it was fun!!#its a crime and a sin that jeyne poole and dacey mormont arent in the show

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motherofkittens94 · 5 years

Text

tagged by @clarasimone

favorite otp😍: theon and sansa or theon and robb

second otp😘: jaime and brienne and jon and ygritte

cutesy ship😚: missandei and grey worm, gilly and sam

wasted potential ship😡: basically all of them in got tbh esepcially theonsa and braime and bran and meera

could’ve been cute if they weren’t enemies at the end😭: bran and meera they exactly really enemies but the ending so not cool , and also jaime nad brienne if they hadnt ruin it at last minute

ot3🤝🤝: ??

guilty pleasure😶: dany and asha / yara ,

guilty pleasure incest ship😳: nah i dont do incest

brotp: dany and missandei, tyrion and jaime ,tyrion and bronn , tyrion and jon , arya and sansa i wanted tyrion and theon to be bros but they wouldnt let me have that

notp🤬: j and c, sansa and p , theon and you know who

villainous crush ship😲: roose and walda? haha

tagging @mrs-storm-andrews @wedonnotcare @ohbellamy @wesawbears @princeofnerds

#i did this based on got because thats what others where doing #but i guess you use other fandoms #im kinda tame with ships personally #Personal stuff #bethans pals

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lexakomtrikrusbitch-blog · 5 years

Text

Jaime Lannister x Targaryen reader P.3

Plot: after fourteen years of hiding from the people who slaughtered her family y/n Targaryen is ready to exact revenge on those people but will a certain lion break through her stone walls.

Warnings: none I think

A/n: ok so it’s about time that I posted the next part and I will admit I’m not happy with this chapter but I can promise you that I will try my hardest to make the next one worthwhile, thanks for all your support xx

As soon as Y/n left the confinements of her room she was on edge, the dwarf that strode next to her seemed too dangerous in his little body, the guards too cautious, Bronn looked bored but still seemed like he knew how to use his weapon and Podrik, the squire Tyrion announced as his, hand all too casually placing his hand near his long sword. It was no lie that even if one of them did try anything she could easily slit their throats before they could draw their swords, it wasn't that that made her uneasy, it was the fact that if she did need to kill them she wouldn't get the chance to do what she came here for. Get revenge.

“They should be just here” Y/n said as she walked confidently into the brothel while Tyrion though showed no signs, was slightly anxious, this brothel was filled with Lannister men. A snake, no two now, in a lions den.

One of the attendants walked up to the party, though the amount of guards should have given off the impression that they were not here to indulge themselves. “is there anything I can help you with?” he asked, looking Y/n up and down with disgust, her dirty clothes making him think she was just a commoner.

“We are looking for Lord Martell” Tyrion explained just as a male shout of pain was heard from a room nearby and Y/n immediately sprung into action heading straight towards the source with Tyrion and the others on her heals, the attendant shouting that this wasn't allowed.

When Y/n turned into the room where the shout was heard from she saw her uncle standing above a man, his knife wedged into his wrist. “At least you haven't killed anyone yet” Y/n said with a small smirk.

Y/n took in her surroundings, the attendant of the brothel long gone after seeing the contents in the room. Oberyn’s knife wedged in the the wrist of a man wearing Lannister colours, a soldier. The soldiers friend stood a few feet away watching everything unfold, not making a move to help his friend. Ellaria stood behind Oberyn, tugging at his jacket “You don't need to do this” she whispered over and over.

Oberyn looked up to the Soldiers friend, a viscous look filled his brown eyes that made Y/n grin, “I am going to take my knife out, if you do not act immediately your friend will bleed out” the soldier nodded, with a sharp motion Oberyn pulled his knife out of the wrist of the whimpering soldier and in a moment both Lannister men were rushing out of the brothel.Oberyn turned towards the the Party that stood behind Y/n and gave a very dramatic bow and not the respectful kind. “Ah Y/n, I see that you led little Tyrion right towards us” Oberyn said in a playful tone.

“Well considering how much you love Kings Landing I figured I might as well tag along to make sure you haven't murdered anyone” she said with a smirk.“As you can see I haven't yet” he said “so if you do not mind I’d like to get back to what I was in the middle of” dismissal.“If you don't mind, Lord Martell, can we have a word?” the smallest Lannister said from behind her, Y/n knew exactly where he stood without having to turn her head, she needed to. “Ah, Lord Tyrion, you'll have to make it quick, I'm rather busy” Oberyn said and threw a lust filled look at his mistress. “I promise” Tyrion said as he guided Y/n’s uncle to the door out the back of the room, leaving Y/n, Ellaria, Bronn and Podrick alone. Ellaria threw a dismissed look at Y/n and stalked off towards another room.

Y/n and Ellaria were the best of friends when they were with Oberyn, both so desperate for his love and affection but as soon as they were left alone they were at each others throats. Ellaria had always made sure Y/n knew exactly how much she loathed Y/n, ever since she arrived in Dorne as a child. The Targaryen girl cared little though, too caught up in grief to make much of it but as she got older she started to feel the same towards her.

Once Ellaria had stalked out of the room she turned towards the two men behind her, Podrick flinched but Bronn didn't bother looking up from picking his nails. “Are you Tyrion’s body guard, lap dog or does he just enjoy male company?” Podrick chocked at the words that poured out of Y/n’s mouth.

Bronn looked up from picking his nails and said “I think that even if I did enjoy male company Tyrion would not be my type” before Bronn looked like he would rather be anywhere else but here but now there was a sort of amusement in his eyes as he'd finally found someone in this god forsaken palace that had a sense of humour.

“Personal guard?” Y/n asked

“I like to think of myself more as legendary hero, known across all lands who Tyrion pays a great deal of money to to keep his lazy ass safe” he chuckled “unfortunately the only part of that story that is wrong is that Tyrion pays me too little”

“You look more like a middle aged drunk to me but” she drawled “still knows how to use a sword”

“You have very good judgment skills milady”

“I also suppose that if asked for you to train with me you'd say yes?”

Bronn shook his head, as if in disbelief, “I can tell you know how to protect yourself” he said looking your dirty training clothes up and down “lets see how well. Tomorrow at dawn I’ll send pod rick to come and collect you, don't cry if you get stabbed”

“The only crying I’d be doing is crying of laughter after I kick your ass” Y/n said defiantly as she walked out of the brothel leaving Bronn and Podrick looking at each other with amusement in their eyes.

When Y/n finally climbed into bed that night she couldn't help but think how well her plan was playing out, if she could gain the trust of Bronn, Tyrion’s most trusted body guard she could get close to Tyrion, then shed move on to Cersie, then the King Slayer, with the Lions cubs gone, Y/n could freely move on too Tywin, the man who ordered the mountain to snatch away Elia’s deceased children, Y/n’s dead siblings and run them through with his sword. The man who ordered those horrid things done to her mother, things that sometimes makes Y/n wake up in a cold sweat. The man who Y/n yearned to kill. With the thought of Tywin Lannister fresh in her mind, Y/n fell asleep clutching the bedsheets.

A/n: I know, I know, I said I’d have Jaime in this chapter but what I had planned just didn’t fit in like I hoped but he will make his debut appearance in the next chapter

Tags:

@camu-winchester

@handplucked

@inhumanhacker

#game of thrones #game of thrones x reader #got #jaime lannister #jaime lannister x reader #tyrion lannister #cersie lannister #daenerys targaryen #jon snow #sansa stark #arya stark #smut #x reader #reader imagine #jaime lannister x targaryen reader #targaryen reader #dragons

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