#personal drama

[g0thnico]

Me (autistic bitch) and my partner in crime (autistic grandma) spent the whole day at the mall looking for things for the wedding of my bro (autistic dad) and his girl (stepmom without any type of mental disorder)

I'm completely exhausted

But I have a 7 cm platform shoe so fuck everything I HAVE A PLATFORM SHOE THAT IS 7 FUCKING CENTIMETERS

I don't talk about my personal life but I don't have the energy to mask my neurodivergent ass

#autism #my grandmother was showing her Stims IM JUST— #I saw my dad but I was tired and he left work and our conversation was like #Hey dad #Hey kid #You haven't seen my new shoes yet: see #Can you walk in this? #Yes #autistic things #personal drama #Shopping #The moment my stepmother said something like: #I can't buy this for your dad because it has a little mark on it and you know how annoying he is #And I: #This is the family

[fandom-junk-drawer]

I just lost everything. My external drive isn't being detected, yet it won't let me eject it because it is in use. Can't run a repair because it won't show up on the computer, and I don't have the money to recover it ($500-$1,000 is just insane).

I lost all my fanfics, artwork (all my Tiny Cloud dragon art, ff7 art, oc stuff, Gorillaz art), photos (my family photos!), important documents, my music (all my Amazing Devil stuff!) headcanons, work documents... all my Witcher related stuff (my headcanons, bleps, speech bubbles, screencaps), I had rare pictures from Ronin Warriors (my childhood!) and other anime from websites that don't even exist anymore! I had a magpie/crow collection of anime and video game (my RE4 stuff, Leon, noooo!) artbook and scans, EVERYTHING....

And I'm just really mad at myself right now because last weekend I thought "This drive is getting a little old. I should probably start transferring everything to the new drive!" But then Stupud Me went "NaH, LeT'S dO iT NeXT wEeKeNd!"

#my stuff #personal #personal drama #im so mad

[tiny-cloud-dragon]

Good news! My external hard drive is not dead dead, just mostly dead! It turns on but doesn't "start up," so the laptop can't see it. All my files should be there! I'm going to see if I can save up some money and get the files off it later.

#my stuff #personal drama #personal

[danielscarcello]

Field of Lucid Dreams

Because I had a hard time getting my novel picked up, I decided to publish my short stories — my collection of coincidences — as a blog, hoping I would gain some traction that way. And before I even wrote a single post, a series of events proved this was the right choice.

At the library where I work, a book came across my desk, called Proof of Heaven, which was about a neurosurgeon who has a near-death experience and describes his vision of the afterlife. It was inside a box full of donated books. I stacked the donations on a cart to shelve them when Sarah, one of my colleagues, stopped me.

“Got one more for you,” she said. She handed me a picture book called Holly, which had a black cat on the cover.

As I filed away the books, I picked up Proof of Heaven and flipped through it. I found a withered prayer card tucked in the book, on page 24; someone must have used as it as a bookmark and forgot about it. I opened the card with one hand, while holding the book open with the other, and one word on the page, from this passage, happened to catch my eye.

Then, out of nowhere, I shouted three words. They were crystal clear, and heard by all the doctors and nurses present, as well as by Holley, who stood a few paces away, just on the other side of the curtain.

“God, help me!”

Holley.

Sarah had just handed me a book called — Holly. I put down Proof of Heaven and picked up Holly, and the first sentence said that last November, we lost our 14-year-old cat named Holly.

That was when Marianne came to mind. Marianne’s birthday was on November 14th. Her father died last year, after a long, grueling illness.

Instead of putting Proof of Heaven on the shelf, I kept it aside for her.

She texted me a few days later: “So I guess I have to read that book now. Last night, this lady at work mentioned that baseball movie, Field of Dreams. Later, I watched this YouTube video, and it mentioned Field of Dreams too. The crazy thing is that the video was about near-death experiences — just like the book.”

“Holy shit!” I wrote.

When I thought about Field of Dreams, I remembered this strange this little episode that took place the night before.

“Here’s another baseball coincidence for you,” I wrote. “Last night I was at Pita Land getting shawarma. I was standing in line, watching TV, and a headline flashed across the screen: ‘Jays sign new infielder Isiah Kiner-Falefa’. But I caught it so quickly that I could have sworn it said infidel, not infielder. I stood by the TV, waiting for the headline to loop back around, so I could see what it actually said. And his name sounded just like what was on the menu — Falafel.”

She sent me a laughing emoji.

“It’s interesting,” she went on. “I never get any signs from my dad, and I want one so badly.”

A few days later, it was New Year’s Eve, and I spent the night at Robb’s place. At one point, he put on the new Dave Chappelle Netflix special: The Dreamer.

Thinking about Field of Dreams, I listened to his monologue, my eyes fixed on the screen.

In your life, at any given moment, the strongest dream in that moment wins that moment. I am a very powerful dreamer. I dreamed tonight as a fourteen-year-old boy, and I’m living it as a fifty-year-old man…

This gave me such a renewed sense of determination to publish my collection of coincidences online. Even if no publisher in the world wanted my book, I would still chase my dream.

And so, the next day, I set out to write my first blog post. I closed my eyes and waited for an idea to come to me. My thoughts went back to Pita Land, and I remembered how on that morning, at work, a bunch of us were talking about obscure horror movies; someone had brought up a documentary about the Donner Party, the group of American pioneers who were trapped in the Sierra Nevada mountains and resorted to cannibalism to survive. Now, just before I saw the headline about Kiner-Falefa, I noticed — for the first time in all the years I’d been eating shawarma — one particular item on the menu: Beef Doner.

With a shudder, I started jotting all this down, wondering how I would string this together into a something worth reading. At first, I couldn’t figure it out, and so I took a break. With obscure horror movies on my mind, I started scrolling through YouTube, looking for something to watch. Then I found a channel called Renegade Films.

At random, I clicked a video called “Who Let Him Make This Movie?”. The movie, which I knew nothing about, was Babylon. As it turned out, much to my delight, Babylon was directed by Damien Chazelle — whose name echoed Dave Chappelle.

When it was over, another video on the channel, right next to the one about Babylon, caught my attention: “The Perfectly Logical Reason This Director Ate His Shoe (inspiring)”.

The director was Werner Herzog. It was about the time Herzog promised Errol Morris he would eat his shoe if he finished a movie about pet cemeteries he was working on. And, as I later read on Wikipedia, “In 1978, when the film Gates of Heaven premiered, Herzog cooked and publicly ate his shoe.”

Pet Cemeteries. Holly. The lost cat. Proof of Heaven. Gates of Heaven.

In other words, the perfectly logical reason this director ate his shoe was so that it would serve as a call to fearlessly chase your dreams. He said:

If I abandon this project, I would be a man without dreams, and I don’t want to live like that. I live my life, or I end my life with this project. All these dreams are yours as well… we have to articulate ourselves otherwise we would be cows in the field.

Field of Dreams.

My head was spinning. Finally, I read the Wikipedia page on Field of Dreams. And the first paragraph absolutely blew me away. Field of Dreams was based on a novel by W.P Kinsella called — Shoeless Joe.

The Perfectly Logical Reason This Director Ate His Shoe.

Frantically, I kept clicking all the links on Wikipedia, writing down all the connections I found — including the fact W.P Kinsella wrote a book called Butterfly Winter, Proof of Heaven had a blue butterfly on its cover, and Werner Herzog directed a movie called Fitzcarraldo, about a man determined to transport a steamship over a hill in the Amazon basin in order to build an opera house.

Field of Dreams gave us the phrase, “If you build it, they will come.”

If you build your website…

– they will come.

Finally, I jumped back to the Wikipedia page for Field of Dreams. In the movie, Ray, who was unable to reconcile with his father before he died, hears the ghost of “Shoeless” Joe Jackson tell him to build a baseball diamond in a cornfield. If you build it, they will come. Throughout the film, Ray sees the ghost of “Shoeless Joe” and other dead baseball players. Then, during a game, when the catcher removes his mask, Ray recognizes him as his father as a young man.

I stopped reading at that point, and I thought about something Dave Chappelle said:

You have to be wise enough to know when you’re living in your dream, and you have to be humble enough to accept when you’re in someone else’s…

All this time, I thought the coincidences were all about my writing, my blog — my dreams. But then I remembered what Marianne said about her father. And I knew I had to be humble enough to accept this wasn’t for me. It was for her.

#spirituality #spiritual disciplines #coincidence #mysticism #religion #motivation #personal development #personal drama #personal diary #novel writing #autofiction #literature #literary fiction #literary quotes #writing #literary agent #blog #blogger #lucid dreaming #psychology #psychonaut

[theangelyouknew]

This will have trigger warnings for sex and abuse. But this is an update on my life right now. (Im currently typing form a friends couch

—————————

So, 4 and a half months ago I almost left a man. Then felt guilty and married him instead. Im aware, legally it’ll be HARDER to leave now, but I was naive. I’ve regret going back to him since the Thursday after my wedding.

Yes some days were good, but then 2 days before Christmas there was shit like him arguing me that I can’t POSSIBLY be bi because I don’t want to eat every chick out and won’t make out with a girl in front of him. (he doesn’t get the difference between bisexual and biromantic) and that I’m “not” ace because that’s “just an excuse”

And I asked him why he’s doing this before Christmas cuz now I gotta act happy around family. “I don’t care”

Xmas eve after pretending shits good around my family - it’s all (blue is me trying to give in to the abuse and keep peace)

Im literally only allowed 10 pics from mobile app. Hold on. I gotta reblog this to continue.

#tw sex #tw abuse #personal drama

[aphroditeslover11]

Don’t you just love life, I have just had a message from my wonderful ex and now have to organise a community Christmas concert with him. I’m riding through on a combination of leftover birthday cake and Prosecco and star of Bethlehem extract. I’m not crying and hugging a copy of American Prometheus, I swear it!

[tittyinfinity]

I'm ngl I had intense anxiety about telling people when I got tears of the kingdom since I had been asking for help with money and I was terrified they'd think I took it and spent it on a $70 game.

I realize that ultimately I don't have to explain myself to anyone or prove to strangers that I'm "being good" but it's also because like. I couldn't actually believe it happened

No like. So I don't hear from my babydaddy in a while. He's been in prison. Has been for most of my kid's life. Then he calls me and is like hey what game have you and our kid been wanting and I'll have my girlfriend bring it

And I was like 😳 last thing he bought for our kid (that I remember) was a full size guitar for his first birthday almost 8 years ago. He's only paid a few hundred in child support.... 2 months worth over the course of almost 9 years. So I'm like. Ok so you're in prison. And you're gonna buy us a brand new game

"Yeah I worked for months in here to get it" (no he did not. his girlfriend bought it.)

So of course I said "Tears of the Kingdom" because I knew I'd never be able to afford a $70 game and it would be something both my son and I could play

Then his girlfriend actually dropped it off the next day. And I was like. Did I actually just get something from my babydaddy.

Then he called me back the next day and said he'd start giving me $300 a month if I provided him with receipts showing that they all go towards gifts only for our kid and I was like oh fuck off

Side note I got a letter in the mail from him last week saying "I miss my son's undying and loyal approval" bro he doesn't know you.

#.bdo #personal drama

[celosiaymierdas]

rant thread:

- being harassed over a lad that don't want her

- all I can think about how does she have the time and energy to throw threats at me behind a different fake account from 2020

- so many grammar issues too

#personal #me #gossip #tea #drama #personal drama #rants n rambles

[dr-harrington]

This is a Vent Post, it includes Personal Struggles that I will not describe in detail for obvious reasons.

Posting this is helping me get it out of my system, if you are not comfortable reading it, I am giving plenty of warning.

I don't ever post emotional/personal shit, please disregard this entirely when it comes to first impressions. Do not follow me expecting Life Drama if this is how you found my blog.

Now that you've been thoroughly warned, here's the post:

This is a letter poem to a friend who is "taking a break" from me. We had a falling out, I left a server we were in, and now he doesn't want to talk to me.

It hasn't even been a day

Isn't it stupid?

I've seen a million things

And thought "he would love this."

I thought about your imagination today

It's such a wonderful place to be

I think about the worlds you create

The lives you share

I saw something today

On a social media platform

Yeah, I know, it's stupid.

Yet it was so poetic, 

it reminded me of us

Us

Us is such a specific term.

What is 'us'?

Before, we were simply strangers

Strangers on opposite ends of the phone screen.

I have never heard your laugh,

I have never seen your eyes light up with a smile.

Yet it feels like I've sat next to you and laid my head on your shoulder.

I've only seen your face once,

Maybe twice, when you were brave enough to share.

I can't remember faces

Yet I remember yours.

It may be distant, fuzzy, and unclear.

But I think if I saw you, I'd recognize you.

Maybe that scares you.

It would scare me too.

"This stranger I barely know can recognize me when we've never met before.

We live miles apart and he can still recognize me.

I never want to meet him."

Yet, even if that's true, I find you saying the opposite.

"I wish I could cuddle you."

"I love you."

"I won't leave you."

What even happened?

I don't understand.

I'm so confused, scared, angry- no- sad. I don't even know.

All I know is that I hurt and I don't know what I did wrong.

Well, I know somewhat.

Was it because I left?

Was it because I was angry? Arguing? Stubborn?

Or did you just realize that I was right, those many times before,

That you would eventually be tired of me?

"I won't ditch you."

But I don't know how long it will be until I speak to you again.

What if it's never?

What if this time makes you realize you wish you never met me in the first place?

What will you do then?

Will you message me before you leave, or will you keep me waiting forever?

We almost knew each other for two years.

That seems to be the maximum length of relationships for me.

Two years of dating,

And she dumped me.

Two years of knowing you…

I'm seeing a pattern.

#serious post #harrington rambles #tw vent #cw vent #vent #vent post #personal issue #personal drama #poem #sounds like a love poem? #love poem #heartbreak

[haroldhighballjordan]

sometimes I randomly think about the time a girl posted in this girls only Facebook group I’m in telling everyone how she broke up with her boyfriend and he lied saying that he lost the spare key she gave him, only to then break into her apartment when she wasn’t home and steal the cat they’d adopted while they were together, but then he denied having done this and she didn’t really have proof that he took the cat since he wouldn’t let her come into his place and look for it. And then another girl saw this post and knew her ex-boyfriend, and she was like “girl. I used to hook up with your mans back in xxxx and I still have his number. If you want, I’ll hit him up and get him to invite me back to his place and see if your cat’s there.” And the OP was like “bet.”

So this woman hit up homie dog, asked him out for drinks, went home with him, slept with him, and then woke up in the middle of the night and TOOK THE CAT. Like she had only said that she would confirm if the cat was there but then she took it upon herself to steal this woman’s cat back. Like she full on Trojan horsed this man and then hit up homegirl like “I got the goods. Where you wanna meet.” And then the two of them posted a photo of them together with the cat to the group.

And I just think women supporting women is so beautiful.

#the best part of all is that I also knew the ex boyfriend because he worked at this place my friend was the manager of #and I texted my friend like ‘yo have you heard about this cat situation’ #and she was like ‘I swear to god if one more person asks me about this fucking cat’ #it was the drama of the century #the whole city was up in arms over this cat

[asteriax63]

DRAMA~

So yesterday one of my best friends attacked my daughter for being trans. I told her how respectless she was right now and she said that I'm the one who is respectless. Today we had beef again and she wanted me to block her and so I did. Them afterwards my brother asked me if I was on REALITY (a streaming platform) right now. I was confused so I entered the app and accidentally clicked on the stream where my brother was with my best "friend". The first thing she said was ,,Oh look, now she's here with her main" and I was like; tf u on about? And she continued to tell everyone that I was continuesly (??) entering the stream with different accounts to harrass them. So I called her out for lying.

This is a screenshot from me calling her out.

It translates to:

What are you talking about?

It's my first time being here.

So you're telling lies about me?

Do you have hobbies perhaps?

After this I got blocked from the host of the stream.

I also called her out on WhatsApp. She tried to pretend she never did anything. Before she left the groupchat she called us lgbtq "freaks". In another groupchat I told her that is's stupid to call us that since she literally has a crush on a transwoman. She tried to pretend that I was lying. And with that she left and I never wanna see her again.

#rant post #Beef #personal drama

[deactivatesamwhich]

There's a whole squad of crackheads out to get me because 8 days ago I threatened to shoot someone's baby-mama (i don't actually own a gun.) But she punched me first, and so hard that my ear and nose bleed. (I think she mistook me for her boyfriend's Ex)

Luckily, this gang is having a hard time figuring out where I live or contacting me because my apartment and phone are registered with my deadname and they don't know it.

But I might still shave my head and start wearing different glasses so I look less like they remember me. And I'll avoid loitering or using public transportation, so I'm less out in the open for them to find.

#personal drama #redneck bullshit

[fandom-junk-drawer]

I know I normally post one Witcher headcanon a week (or try to, at least), but I'm going to have to change that. I'm not feeling burned out, and I'm not lacking in headcanon ideas, I just need to focus on my health.

It's been two years since my aunt (who I was very close with and took care of) passed just days before Christmas. When she was alive, I was doing all sorts of physical activity, including weight lifting so I would be able to at least support some of her weight if I needed to.

I've never been a healthy weight, but I did go from 210lbs down to 167lbs. But after my aunt passed, I just lost the motivation to do anything. Then I just got lazy, and made excuses not to exercise. I had (and have) time to exercise, but it was (and is) more fun to just come home, shower, eat, and work on headcanons.

But now I just don't feel good. I've gained 25lbs, and have all kinds of aches and pains that I didn't have when I was working out. I can't run with my 3yr olds in class, my clothes don't fit, my body hurts, I don't like the way I look, and I just feel crummy overall. I need to get back on my workout routine.

I know it's going to suck, because I have to start all over from the begining, but I'm going to have to take that first step. I'm taking care of my dad now, and I've had to help him get up off the floor a few times already. It just showed me how out of shape I've gotten! And I see how hard a time he has moving around and doing things for himself, and I don't want to be like that when I get to be his age.

Two years ago I was able to do three full push-ups. Now, my dumpy butt can barely do three off my knees. And I keep putting stuff out! Everytime I turn around, I've put a rib out, or my neck out. It's infuriating!

I'll have to go back to my old routine of working on headcanons on Sundays and see how that works. It might be a two week gap between headcanons, if everything works out.

I'm going start Monday, so wish me luck!

#personal #my stuff #personal drama

[twopercentboy]

yk if anyone is interested in small town drama, my family and I currently have beef w my former (and my siblings current) k-8 school due to the fact that over the past few years the school admin and parents either have forgotten/ignored or never were informed of what the school's mascot Actually Is (and have subsequently insisted that it's just a generic dinosaur) and the reason my family and I have beef about it is bc I was part of their inaugural 8th grade class and they had us all come up w a mascot and logo to pitch to the entire student body to be voted on, and mine won !!!

my mascot idea and my logo design were voted as the winner but bc bitches love alliteration they just started calling us the dinos instead of the specific dinosaur I chose (bc we had criteria to meet, it had to be an animal native to our state) so now, 5 years later, with new ppl running the school and many new families who weren't around the inaugural year, my legacy is all but forgotten and we are upset 🤬 (since my siblings still go there and my mom is still on the PTA, we are currently fighting for them to make school merch w the name of the dinosaur and include a placard somewhere in the school explaining the story and naming me [albeit deadnamed] as the creator)

#my.txt #me.txt #personal drama #small town drama #also sidenote i am pissed that they never gave me my original sketch of the logo back #my own original art that was my best piece from 8th grade and they never gave jt back 🤬🤬 #forEVER pissed about that

[reduxskullduggerry]

Does someone ever tell you something and you’re like thanks I could lived my whole life without knowing that and been better off bc now it’s consuming me

#not about media or blorbos. #just like #personal drama

[theangelyouknew]

I’ve been trying to explain to him that his words hurt me. And it’s not clicking. And I don’t understand why. He’s so wrapped up in his hurt. It hurt him that I left. It hurt him that I grabbed my stuff.

It hurt me to be talked to like that. It hurt me to be talked to all the time like this. And he says he doesn’t do it all the time.

He says I left because he’s concerned about my weight. That’s not.. that’s not what the fuck happened. If he was just concerned it’d be one thing. I don’t. I don’t get it.

#personal drama