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#phoenixyfriend

hate them | don’t really care | like them | LOVE them | THEY ARE MY PRECIOUS

ship with: None. 

friendship them with: ……also none? I guess if you need someone for Kakashi or, idk, Itachi to talk to, she’s fine?

general opinions: Oh, Anko…… fandom ruined you for me so hard LMAO. Do I feel bad I actively dislike a female character for no reason other than “fans annoy me”? Yes. Is that going to change me avoiding her like the plague? No. : )

Actually, Anko as she appears in both the manga and anime is perfectly fine. I don’t mind her being a cameo or minor character in fic as long as she’s just doing her canon job. But Anko has the same sort of thing going for her as Yamato, where I just…. really aggressively don’t care about her, except that on top of that, she gets flanderized so much it’s tipped into me not liking her. u_u;

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hate them | don’t really care | like them | LOVE them | THEY ARE MY PRECIOUS

ship with: None. :^) 

friendship them with: Kakashi. Maybe Gai?

general opinions: Yamato is one of those characters where, like…. I didn’t mind him in the manga, but I also didn’t find him very interesting and wanted Kakashi back. In canon, he’s fine. He’s there and I’m not annoyed by him. However, he is one of those characters where I’m likely to skip any fics where he features prominently. “Hate” is too strong a word, but the meme doesn’t have a “dislike” button, sooo…. I don’t mind if he’s a background character, or if he makes a few cameos! I’ve included him in my own fic concepts because he’s a convenient source of information! I just…. aggressively don’t care about him? Does that make sense? Like, because a lot of fandom wants to work really hard to make him Important, I actively avoid content about him because that type of thing is very not my cup of tea. 

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hate them | don’t really care | like them | LOVE them | THEY ARE MY PRECIOUS

ship with: Neji. Lee. Neji AND Lee. Any of the ladies. 

friendship them with: Same as above. xD Might also be interested in any AU where she gets to hang out with one or more of the Seven Swordsmen?

general opinions: Tenten isn’t a character I think about too much, but I appreciate when she’s there! Her character development is one of the few where I think she benefitted from anime-only additions. 

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hate them | don’t really care | like them | LOVE them | THEY ARE MY PRECIOUS

ship with: Hidan! I am also very open to weird crack ships with Kakuzu. 

friendship them with: Kakuzu……. is bad at friendship. But I would kill for an AU where Tsunade joins Akatsuki and Kakuzu has to work with her. They’d hate each other but also have Grudging Respect for each other and it would be fantastic. Also even if Kakuzu and Hidan claim to despise each other, you can tell that they are friends. u.u

general opinions: I am just…. Akatsuki trash……. Is Kakuzu my favorite Akatsuki member? No, but that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t stan him. He’s both easy and fun to write about, and I like weird AUs where he has to reel in his temper to work with other people, especially if it ends in disaster. There’s a lot of crackfic potential with Kakuzu, since I think you could get him into basically any weird and comical situation if you offered him enough money, which is always a good character trait. I also really liked his and Hidan’s canon dynamic. Very good, would watch again. 

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character: hate them | don’t really care | like them | LOVE them | THEY ARE MY PRECIOUS

ship with:  Deidara, you cowards. Kakashi is an obvious ship. And apparently also Madara based on that last ask??

friendship them with: Let Tobi and White Zetsu be dumbasses together while Black Zetsu and Obito make Convoluted Evil Plans. Also Team Minato fluff fics…. why not more?

general opinions: I didn’t really care that much for Obito, but then I started writing him and… having him switch between Tobi and magnificent bastard mode is kind of fun? Plus I’ve read a few Obito-centric AUs that I enjoyed (the most recent being Ser Serendipity’s Obito-Sensei). so he gets bumped up to “like” LMAO. I always liked Tobi as a side character for slapstick, so I do wish people would lean into explorations of Tobi-is-Obito-fucking-around more often. 

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CONTROVERSIAL OPINION TIME

hate them | don’t really care | like them | LOVE them | THEY ARE MY PRECIOUS

ship with: okay every time i see “MadaTobi” I think it’s Madara/Obito’s Alter Ego and I feel cheated every. single. time. I want young sexy Madara shot forward in time and ready to make it everyone’s problem but his partner in crime is….. insisting on…. being like this……….. he would set him on fire but unfortunately apparently Madara’s future self made the bastard intangible :(

Of the Founders Era people I do like Tobirama most, so Madara/Tobirama isn’t actually bad….. make Tobirama date an Uchiha. DO IT. 

friendship them with:  Hashirama. u.u Also Boob!Hashirama. 

general opinions: Look I know he’s a fan favorite, but Madara was introduced way too late in the game for me to give a fuck. I have already met several Uchiha with ass-pull powers and I am not impressed. Maybe I would be interested in his Hashirama obsession if I liked Hashirama, but I am also bored on this front. In fic Madara is alright as a screaming ball of rage in the background, but I’m unlikely to read anything with him as a main character. 

……unless it’s that one where he’s reincarnated as Sakura as very proud of his pink hair, because that’s hilarious. 

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hate them | don’t really care | like them | LOVE them | THEY ARE MY PRECIOUS

ship with: Sakura!! I also wrote a (unpublished) fic once where she had to work with Itachi and that made me…. intrigued….? I also also have a fic concept with Karin/Deidara as a ship, which is sort of fun…. also very shouty LMAO

friendship them with: Besides Team Taka, I want more Karin and Team 7 content. :( She rode around half-conscious on Kakashi’s back for several episodes and there was NO conversation? She and Naruto never compared family trees? She was close enough friends with Sakura that she delivered her child and we barely see them interact??? Come on. 

general opinions: I’m weak to complete gremlin bastard women….!! Plus Karin’s skillset and background make her super fun to play around with for AUs and no one does this for some reason so whatever you come up with is unique LMAO. Idk, I Just Think She’s Neat. 

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hah i am VERY ANGRY ABOUT THIS, HOW DARE, because my brain was like Lotor/Dean? hmmm pain you say terrible fathers and torture hmmm??

Bobby, he of the many husbands, is absolutely going to get courted by Coran, no question whatsoever in my mind, Bobby is excited to not be the himbo in the relationship for once

honestly it’s hard for me to see Dean with anyone but him and Hunk would be cooking buddies. I could see Hunk baking pies and being all “pie is for emotionally open people, Dean, not for repressed people! tell me your troubles, friend” and normally Dean would tell him to screw off but the pie is SO good

Allura and Jo would get along so well, fighty gals who do what they do to honor their fathers? and the smol and tol of it. Both of them would be like “haha yeah this is my girlfriend she fights demons/monsters/ghosts/aliens nbd” but inside they are FREAKING OUT because omg my gf is so strong and pretty and smart and funny and deadly and soft and terrifying and and and *gay static*

BUT, and this is VERY IMPORTANT, 

SAM AND PIDGE

they don’t need to be smexy ships. they just need to be lowkey ride-or-die tech buddies with the MOST absurd height difference EVER. they get into a hacking argument and Pidge legit stands on a countertop so she can yell in Sam’s face, I am LIVING.

Allura lowkey being into Sam but tbh a lot of it’s the height? but mostly pidge and sam, thank you for this

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Shinichi shrinking into Conan, call that soccer shorts. Of course since that happened he only plays small-sided games. Meanwhile if he played baseball he’d be the shortstop, except when he was trying to get to Holmes base.

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Trope Mash-Up Meme: Circus + Stranded Due to Inclement Weather 

oh so we like NONSENSE CRACK SHIPS do we

Keep reading

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For the Trope Mash-Up Meme: “Intimate Artistry” + “Forgotten First Meeting”

uuuuh so this is………. kind of fucked up? which is the only way i can really see Sasori ships going fhjdskfh. so i’m going to put it under a cut and slap some warnings in the tags. 

Keep reading

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that was a big sidestep, though the show has dealt with “i got pregnant while possessed by a demon” 

(update: IS this a fic trope?? have I somehow managed to never see an accidental baby from soulless sam fic while there are tons out there???)

for the record, Sam would absolutely take responsibility as much as he could, but now for Crossover Purposes, I am trying to think who would the most likely Baby Mama would be

Elektra Nachios–Sam goes FERAL because he can’t let a child be raised as an assassin!!! Dean doesn’t get what the big deal is, chick’s rich and being a trained assassin seems a half-step up from being a hunter, so, you know, not bad! Sam and Elektra keep kidnapping their baby back and forth. Elektra thinks this is his way of flirting. Their kid is in middle school before they realize that kidnapping is not how custody works. Also both Sam and Elektra are dead or have been dead so that’s fun.

Wanda Maximoff–Wanda’s seen enough shit, BUT Wanda being a witch is PRIMO comedy. Wanda and Sam have a very side-eye-UGH relationship because Wanda very much does not approve of monster hunting and the Winchesters have a storied history of hating witches. Bonus points for Billy finding out his mom is a cougar and taking the kiddo to have playdates with Little Kate, and by “taking” I mean “kidnapping during a Wanda/Sam screaming match” and in doing so accidentally introducing Dean to the whole team, causing no less that six separate bisexual crises

Natasha Romanov–Natasha has spent, what, 50 years unable to get pregnant, so she finds out and is like “haha what the FUCK are you talking about” and wants absolutely nothing to do with a baby, she’s got enough on her hands with watching over Steve thank you very much. She tracks Sam down (scary enough!) and hands over the baby with no explanation. She’s not mean, she gives him like, a diaper bag full of supplies (and she stuck a subdermal tracker behind the baby’s ear so she can keep track of them). She pops by once every few months. They have the least antagonistic coparenting relationship (mostly because Natasha is like, I do not want to be a parent, I am fine being this child’s friend and vodka aunt who happened to give birth to them)

Kate Bishop–you know I had to do it to ya. I can’t imagine Kate being careless with protection so this is a “Winchester dicks are murderous and also magical, apparently” and she is FrEaKiNg OuT. Billy and Clint go with her to all the lamaze classes and all of the Young Avengers are like “we’re having a baby!!!” and Kate gets so mad because SHE is having a BABY, SHE is going through labor.  Everyone in her birthing classes thinks that she’s carrying Clint and Billy’s baby, which is the only thing that gets her through it without committing a felony. She runs into the Winchesters when they’re on a hunt arrowing and knifing a monster with a tiny little baby strapped to her chest. And Dean is? Beside himself? Lady, what the hell??? Are you doing bringing a baby into a knife fight??? She’s mad that he would question her parenting skills and then she sees Sam and manages to knock him on his ass without waking up Baby because you FUCKER

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Trope mash-up meme, Baby Fic + Everybody Knows/Mistaken for Couple 

This fic takes place between when Sasori dies and when Tobi is officially “recruited,” so Deidara is partner-less. Pein and Konan try to let him take solo missions, but Deidara is “passionate about art” and really needs someone there to hold him back sometimes. So he gets stuck on a mission with Itachi and Kisame. 

This mission goes wrong almost immediately. Kisame is Damsel in Distress-ed somehow– either kidnapped or poison or something. Don’t worry about it, although bonus points if it happens because Deidara and Itachi can’t work together. The point is that Itachi and Deidara have to work together to save him. Luckily, Itachi has a genius plan!

It involves stealing a baby.

Keep reading

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It is time once again to reread my favourite fic!! It’s 217.6k and I’ve read it 7 times at this point, and every time I love it more so like. Bigass fucking props to @phoenixyfriend. Check out her writing if you haven’t already cus, cus it’s top notch

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So I was talking to a friend the other day and price/size of our apartments came up. Quick background: She lives with her boyfriend in a suburb of this particular city and I live with my two cats “in” this city. Turns out my apartment is not only larger and has more amenities for the same price (total) as her’s, but can also ‘technically’ be used as a 2b1ba (I needed an office space due to working from home when I was looking at places in November) and, with the price I’m paying, I’m literally living in the place my ex and I used to talk about renting together before and during when we were dating. Which honestly, is nice for me since I can afford it alone, but also wow. Should I find a roommate once I have to go into the office full time again?? 


(I probably won’t; I filled that room with a daybed, bookshelves, and my sewing/work table.)

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What comes to mind is that royed is more or less a notp for me - unnnnnless you’re @metisket or @silentwalrus1​ in which case consider me signed up. Recs: Roy introduces his loved ones to each other cage match (pleasantly twisty), the grapefruit fic (I nearly choked and died laughing; this one is very nsfw, though I hesitate to categorize whatever the hell is happening here as “porn”).

Comic writers are much harder to endorse like this because 1. they work in teams, so how do you trust anyone’s content this much, in practice, and 2. there’s no convenient single webpage linking the bulk of their work to make consuming everything someone’s ever touched easy. Maybe Ryan North? His writing style is like sinking into a brainy jacuzzi: I literally cannot assess his choices critically. I just melt into a pile of huhu word machine go brr.

(In comics I’m more used to the reverse, “This is an objectively good idea that’s been done well that you, personally, make look like a bad choice.“ Professional is not a guarantee of better.)

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I think a Spider-Man adaptation could work really well with the kind of deliberate vintage-homaging anachronism Batman: The Animated Series used. In that context I would absolutely want MJ at the forefront of talking how Stan Lee wrote patter, where she belongs.

In a more standard attempt to write in a timeless present, I’d still enjoy it immensely. Maybe specify that this version of MJ is a nerd for old movies as part of her acting aspirations. (Or just…don’t explain it at all. This would probably be a bad choice, but I personally would adore even more.)

But this is actually a distant second in my book after updating how she talks – while still trying to convey the effect the way she spoke when she was introduced was supposed to have. It is absolutely critical that people would still go “Who talks like that??”

MJ’s speaking style and way of dressing and acting were very loud characterization shorthands to the audience of the time that are all nearly silent today. BUT they all have modern equivalents that an adaptation of MJ could wear well, netting you characterization that lands for a modern audience who lack prior knowledge while still being true to her.

I want a modern MJ adaptation who uses a barrage of current slang to an extreme that waltzes on the border of incomprehensible. I want it to make perfect sense that May cannot understand her. Yes, this would give the work a strong chance of aging poorly. I am willing to take that risk.

And leave her fondness for alliteration: It makes the dialogue fun and indirectly conveys that not being a STEM major doesn’t mean her mind isn’t whirring at mile a minute.

Peter, in this version, should still sound vaguely like a radio personality from 1969. The specifics of his speaking style are more integral to his voice, they don’t update to a modern equivalent without masses of information loss, they aged better and are more likely to still mean something to a present day audience, he’s old man kin, AND it enunciates that Peter and MJ are foils who don’t seem like they should be going to the same place. Nerd and cheerleader?? No! Man who talks like he passed up an invite to Woodstock to stay in studying and woman who talks like TikTok embodied and brought to life by a genie.

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Answer

This one’s hard to answer because … possibly is my best guess?

The main thing holding me back would probably be that I don’t have like, any handle on most of them as characters - which is the same thing that held me back from writing Akatsuki, which I’m sliding into more and more now, or the Sannin at one point, etc. It’s a very familiar something I go through once I’m into a fandom and have established a grasp of some characters, and then eventually want to branch out. With as much as I write Oto and related things they’re likely to come up through that eventually and I’ll be forced to jump into getting a grip on how to write them that way, for a start.

…there’s also admittedly the fact that while I do know him, of course, Sasuke is legitimately one of my least favourites to write. (Not that this stops me writing Team 7, Team 7 OT3, or other things, obviously. I do write Sasuke, I just bitch about him in the process and often want to stab him…)

Basically, yes, I would, factoring in an idea that either requires them or that snags me enough to drag me over the anxious bit of ‘but I don’t know these characters’. >.>

~Kalira

(Ask me a writer’s would you ever?)

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Answer

Mmmaybe! Honestly I find crossovers really difficult so I might be more likely to write a fusion - and with those two fandoms, it could honestly go either way, transplanting Marvel characters into ninja world or making Marvel heroes of some of my favourite ninja.

Though in theory with both of those canons there’s enough reality-breaking and transport/portal-type fuckery going on that I could pull a crossover without giving myself a conniption… Dump someone(s) off unexpectedly in the middle of Xavier’s school or in Tony’s lab … or Tobirama or Minato’s workroom… XD

They would disaster through so much in either case, and … well, hopefully (maybe) no one would end up actually in pieces and/or dead? XD

~Kalira

(Ask me a writer’s would you ever?)

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