#sir!!! i am unwell

[theinfinitedivides]

"you love her, don't you?"

"who, Naina? nahi, ma, i don't love her. not Naina."

"i never said it was Naina."

#film: kal ho naa ho #kal ho naa ho #khnh #bollywood #i vaguely remember seeing this scene in a compilation of most devastating Bollywood lines and i did not understand then #but i do now #sir!!! i am unwell #they took this man. #they coded this man as bi (and did so frighteningly well). #said bi man knows that he is also very hot (from his own admission). #they gave him a wife (unnecessary!) who apparently left him (for unknown reasons). #they then threw him in New York with Naina and Rahit and the gay couple cameo in that one song i still haven't found the name of. #they are now telling me that not only is this man bi they are trying to take us down the tragic gay trope??? is that what i'm seeing??? #hey ik i told my bestie i would sell my organs for this man but that line??? #'this heart is very weak'??? #was i supposed to mean that??? #pls i am begging the screenwriters to let this man be gay and LIVE pls 🙏🏼 #let him get both of them it's what he deserves #local gay watches Bollywood.txt

[artkaninchenbau]

I need Hancock to join Cross Guild so bad

#One Piece #Boa Hancock #Sir Crocodile #Cross Guild #OP Spoilers #My art #Emerging from the void to post one (1) shitpost that got out of hand #''I'll just doodle that really quick. I won't put any effort into it'' #I am a fool #Y'all I haven't had One Piece brainrot this bad in about a decade. I am frankly unwell #The things I've been posting on my sideblog are absolute unhinged

[respectthepetty]

When Yuan asked Qian if he liked him, Qian started disconnecting. He closed his eyes.

He looked away and clenched his jaw.

Then Yuan placed his hand on Qian.

He slowly drew him back to the moment.

His touch made Qian come back to him.

When San Pang questioned Qian's feelings for Yuan on that couch, Qian looked away and avoided the question, but here, with the bracelet that Qian gave Yuan to remember their bond proudly placed on Yuan's wrist connecting them, Qian must face what is between them.

He must face Yuan.

He didn't do that last time.

But Yuan is making sure he does it now because regardless of the answer, Qian can't keep avoiding the question.

#unknown #unknown the series #I am unwell about Qian #he is my special boy #and he deserves to be loved by Yuan #now he just needs to let him #answer the question sir #and look him in his eye when you try to say it's nothing #face the man you love when you try to tell him you feel nothing #I didn't raise a liar

[smittenskitten]

You seem to be following the steps of the poet, Phraya Sisunthonwohan. Soon you'll have about 10 wives under your arm. Lovers? One is enough for me.

#i feel you linger in the air #thaidramaedit #i feel you linger in the air the series #nonkul chanon #bright rapheephong #asianlgbtqdrama #asiandramaedit #perioddramaedit #ifylitaedit #prangon gifs #khun yai! you can't just recite love poetry while laying on a man's lap!!! #you sir! are romancing the heck out of him #both of you caressing each other's hand. wrist. fingers #please i am unwell #they have captured me body and soul #don't send help #let me stay here forever

[ghost-inthe-hall]

#iv #sleep token #i am unwell sir

[lunargrapejuice]

art credit by @/eriimyon on twitter

#i love him i love him i love him #I AM UNWELL OVER THIS #SIR #GOOD GOD #I barely even have words f djdkdkdkd #we’re feeling h word on main today friends #🌙lunar.thirsts #diluc

[future-crab]

I love getting overly attached to characters who are just so lame. Like, Jonathan Jarchivist Sims does have attributes that are theoretically very cool (he became god, he could kill people with his mind and all that) but the scenes that have me grinning and twirling my hair are always, like. Jon sitting at his desk and bitterly muttering about how his coworkers stole his pens.

#‘sleeping people don’t need pens’ sir i love you #i was just thinking about that scene and i LITERALLY started twirling my hair i am UNWELL #jonathan sims #mag 123 #tma #the magnus archives

[almond-tofuuu]

HE GAVE ME PERMISSION TO UNBUTTON HIS SHIRT 😳😫

THIS MAN MAKES ME FEEL SO MANY EMOTIONS

#love and deepspace #zayne #zayne love and deepspace #sir please #on my knees #i am unwell #he makes me feel things #so many thoughts #this man is gonna be the death of me #god i love him

[ineed-to-sleep]

I finally played the touchstarved demo and I thought I would be stronger than this but when this man showed up I folded so fast

#the.the fuckign #way this man is dressed. is doing things to me #he's *so* slay #excuse me sir but why are you. as a Doctor of Medicine. slaying this hard w your work outfit #sleep.txt #he's also like. so nice #and polite #and kind #I'm kicking my feet I'm giggling like a schoolgirl #also the gall of the mc to say 'he's easily a head taller than most. I have to crane my neck to look at him' so casually #like it was nothing #unwell. I am unwell #touchstarved

[grelleshighheels]

i'm sorry for the person i'll become when HE gets animated

#oh i am unwell you will literally NEVER HEAR ME SHUT UP LMAO #can you imagine when i first read the arc and saw him dressed like that and with the glasses like sir stop #weston college #not to mention the kuromyu my poor little heart #kuroshitsuji #black butler #sebastian michaelis #kuroshitsuji weston arc #kuroshitsuji season 4 #kuroshitsuji secrets of the public school #black butler season 4 #mypost

[brokenbellsofoblivion]

#SAMUEL FRANCIS #holy shit #I AM UNWELL #SIR #WHAT THE ACTUSLCFUCK #sam kiszka #SHIIIIIT #sam lane #sammy kiszka #destroy me #holy fuck #fucking hell #greta van fleet #what the fuck

[joelsgreys]

JESUS PEDRO CAN U AT LEAST WARN A BITCH

#you can’t be doing that sir #just springing those curls on us without warning #pedro pascal #i am so unwell

[ladykyriaa]

Oh goodness me

#this scene had me fanning myself like a victorian era woman who had seen something she wasnt supposed to #jinshi. sir. SIR #oh i am so unwell #the apothecary diaries manga #the apothecary diaries

[writing-yarn-goblin]

GUESS WHAT, B*TCHES!

I’m baaaaaack!~

It’s March and I post whatever I fuckin’ want! Oh yeah, it’s a songfic!

Character: Sir Crocodile (a little bit of Katakuri Charlotte, but just a smidge)

Relationship: slight KatakurixXReader but also catching Sir Crocodile’s eye (and more)

Song: Sweet by Unlike Pluto

Warnings: forced marriage, drug mention, alcohol, Crocodile being himself

~*~

“Introducing for one night only! The beauty that pounds whiskey like a sailor and sings like an angel: (Y/N) (L/N)!”

You heard the crowd go wild.

The sigh that escaped your lips as you took a long drag of the almond-vanilla flavored cigar that was currently in between your gloved hands as you made your way to the stage.

The sway of your hips, the tight knee-high black dress with a sweetheart collar hugging your curves lusciously as your hair was kept messy, framing your face and to finish the look- a pair of Mary Jane kitten heel shoes.

Your lips were dark red but the rest of the make up was simple.

A little powder, cat-eye liner and blush.

A wink could decimate nations, said your fiancé once.

The lights on the stage were on you as the white fur coat you were wearing slid from your shoulders to your elbows as you gently gripped the microphone’s stand as your lips opened to do their thing.

“My baby and I like new silky sheets every night.

He buys me bourb' and whiskey neat,

And keeps on comin' every week…”

Your stare could only focus on the table were your lug of a fiancé was.

Charlotte Katakuri.

He seemed bored with his surroundings. Not really his scene but he had to keep up appearances as head of this town’s sweets factory. His mother made sure to pop out enough children to make an infuriatingly huge monopoly of different businesses just so she could have absolute control of most markets.

“Ooh, he wants the suburbs

When school's out for summer

And we live by his mother

I keep my drugs in the cupboard 'cause”

You could only look at him with a little spite.

“I'm only sweet when I'm high…”

You noticed that the normally serious face he wore suddenly made a move, his lips twitched downwards as he downed his LIT, completely in one gulp.

This finally got him.

He looked down at his drink as you kept singing your song, almost like if he was contemplating how guilty he felt to just have picked you from a line of potential wives his mother gave him and he just picked you.

Little, wild you.

You, whom he thought would be gracious enough to accept a marriage proposal out of the goodness of your heart.

‘What a shame’ he thought. ‘I thought this recent flight of fancy would keep her calm’ he argued with his head.

He didn’t noticed that he wasn’t the only one staring at the beauty with a savvy mouth.

He wasn’t the only magnate in this town.

“In class, I learned to lie

To pretty boys, to pass the time…”

She stared at him as she sang this particular verse.

How many times has she lied to him just to get him off her back?

How many times did she pretend to be okay in front of him?

How many times did her whispered words meant what they preached while he was in the passionate throes of sex?

He had it.

He stood up from his table and grabbed his coat, leaving on the table a shiny object with a scarp of paper that said “goodbye”.

He didn’t notice on his way out the door of the glare that was directed to him from the bar. Cigar smoke filtering out as he heard the man at the bar to bring the lady’s belongings to him, that he’d take care of her moving forward.

“'Cause I got that good shit, Alabastian pride.

Kiss the kids goodnight and take the Harley for a ride”

The man at the bar just grinned.

That seemed like Little Miss Sailor was in the market again.

Not that he had to do much.

She did it all her self in an act of defiance towards the softest yet most ruthless of the Charlotte’s. And she didn’t even get to the good part of this song.

The man at the bar was a tall man. Not as tall as Katakuri but still very tall. He had suffered the loss of a hand but that didn’t hinder him at all, he had prosthetics to make up for the loss of a limb, he just preferred the gold hook on his missing limb.

He saw how the lonely woman stared at the table bitterly, almost relieved that she didn’t have to talk to what he could firmly say was her boyfriend.

“Ooh, I get so bored, scrub the floors

Then get drunk while doing chores

Does he even know me…?”

He had enough of waiting.

“Waitress? I want that table.”

A woman like that deserved to be looked upon closely.

“Ooh, I'm never sure when he'll be home

Get into trouble on my own

I don't get lonely…”

You were still singing your little heart out as you batted your eyes to shake some of the tears. Katakuri wasn’t a bad man, but you would’ve rather to pick your own groom and wed because you wanted to.

Not because your own family wanted to have financial relief in these trying times.

Such was the life of the eldest daughter.

But no matter, you could firmly say that your groom-to-be was no longer in the horizon as he left with a disappointed frown.

“I’m only sweet when I’m high…”

You spoke the last verse, only to have the whole club erupt in howls and cheers.

With a bashful smile, you made your way behind the stage and down to the main floor.

You felt a little taken back when your things were on your usual table, but relieved when one of the waitresses directed you to your new table.

In the VIP section.

With your things.

You looked at how this dashing mystery man was taking a drag from his cigar and seemed to be pouring two glasses of champagne.

You had to be careful, however. This day and age, most men can and will do anything. But this man just massive and intimidating. The scar upon his face should’ve scared you but, you were used to men with…interesting features.

“Take a seat. We have a few things to converse about, Little desert flower.”

…to be continued?

#one piece #reader insert #x reader #i am unwell #fem reader #one piece fanfiction #songfic #crocodile x reader #sir crocodile #crocodile x you

[incorrect-ikevamp-quotes]

Comte Election Story, 6th Anniversary Event (JPN 2023)

I managed to get Comte's collection story during the 6th year anniversary event in the JPN version of the game. As usual, my translation skills are rudimentary at best, so this is just a rough/general sense of the contents. Rest of the translation is below the cut:

Sweet and lovely, our everyday life is irreplaceable. After becoming a vampire, I’ve lived with him forever like this. I seek out more and more of the man I love than anyone else--

Comte: Good morning, MC. You’re up very early today.

I went down to the dining room a few hours before dawn--only to find Comte nursing a teacup gracefully at one end of the table.

MC: Good morning. I managed to wake up somehow…how about you?

Comte: Actually, I just got back.

When I asked, he told me that the host of the party started talking to him all night, and they didn’t part ways until after midnight.

Comte: I was going to finish this cup of tea to unwind, and then try to rest til noon.

He runs a hand through his freshly washed hair and brings the cup to his mouth in a series of elegant gestures that makes me fall in love with him all over again. I’m not sure if it’s because I’ve been up all night, but my heart readily starts beating faster.

Even Comte seems to notice my reaction…

Comte: …looking at me like that, are you seducing me?

Comte's eyes narrowed mischievously and he left his cup behind to approach me. A beautiful beast gazed at me as if to take aim at his prey, and he drew me in with supple hands.

MC: I didn’t intend it that way but…it’s true that I'm captivated. Your damp hair and lovely gestures are so sexy that I’m at a loss…

Comte: Saying such a thing…you’re a naughty woman, MC. Even though I tried to quell my ardor with a cold shower and hot tea...I’m glad to hear it, even though I’m far from calm.

When I raised my head--having looked down in bashful embarrassment--I can see burgeoning in Comte’s eyes an indisputable, feverish desire…

MC: Ah, mm…

His soft lips playfully brushed against the nape of my neck.

Comte: No one else would be awake at this hour…though we could be interrupted any moment. Make sure to keep your voice down.

He chuckled a little before a hot sigh caressed my skin, dropping kisses one after another. He circled around the usual place he’d sink his fangs into me, and every brush of his lips made heat gather low in my body…

MC: So impatient…Abel…

Comte: …I’ve been waiting for you to give it to me

The corners of his lips lifted a little, before he buried his fangs into my neck.

MC: Mn, ah…aaaahh…

Comte: I love you so much...and whenever we aren't together, I’m starved of you. We were miles apart all night yesterday. I’ll show you just how much I missed you.

His voice--half-intoxicated with the ecstasy of my blood--was sweet and husky with his desire.

Comte: Before you, I’m always a love-starved beast.

As I gaze into those eyes burning with emotion, an electric sensation tingles down my spine. 

(Ah, I’m just the same. It’s not only my heart, my body is always seeking you out too.)

MC: Me too…all day and night, I’m always thinking about you…

Comte: --Come here. Take as much of me as you want

At his encouragement and incitement, I sink my fangs into him.

MC: ah, ha…

Pleasure washes over me in an endless cascade, every sensation in my body heightened and sharp. I clenched my hands tighter through his wet hair, and dug my fangs into him greedily to devour that wellspring of ecstasy. 

Comte: I'm happy to be able to share love with you like this, as a vampire.

Like drops of water moistening desiccated earth, every crimson drop fills us to the brim--

#ikevamp #ikemen vampire #ikevamp saint germain #ikevamp comte #ikevamp mc #comte propaganda #if you can't already tell from the contents of this one--i straight up died after reading it #THE IMPLICATIONS. FOAMING AT THE MOUTH. #the way they're both dancing around it. MC trying to be strong and endure properly (girl same) and. comte. #THE WAY COMTE BASICALLY STARTS SHAKING HIS ASS LIKE ONE OF THOSE BIRDS OF PARADISE. I AM UNWELL (AND ECSTATIC). #THE WAY HE WANTS HER TO WANT HIM AS INTENSELY/DESPERATELY AS HE DOES HER. THE WAY HE RELISHES HER BITING HIM HARD. #IM NEVER GONNA RECOVER FROM THIS ONE #ive legit just been that ace attorney meme with phoenix holding his head in his hands for DAYS #dare i even mention 'make sure to keep your voice down.' SIR. SIR ARE YOU SRS RN #man the way in purple moon event he was like 'oh nooooo haha no hank pank in public where we might get caught that's too inappropriate~ owo #I SEE YOU ABEL. I SEE YOU MONSIEUR LE COMTE DE SAINT GERMAIN. #I SEE THAT U SIT UPON A THRONE OF L I E S #i hope whoever writes comte as unhinged as possible over at jpn cybird gets a god damn raise #i have never in my life been so directly catered to in one chara i swear #'loved-starved beast' ILL DO YOU ONE BETTER COMTE JUST LET ME IN. LET ME IIIIIIIIN!!!!!! #straight up ive said it before and ill say it again #that's my emotional support softcore yan meow meow golden retriever #every event im like 'hope this doesn't awaken anything inside me.' and then immediately its just 'failed step one.' #although all jokes aside i do find it endlessly fascinating about the purebloods how like #while they don't experience as much bloodlust there is this acute sense of biting as a vital expression of romantic interest and/or claim #i dont think its a throwaway line that comte says at the end--id actually argue a lot of his desire for intimacy when she's human (cont.)-> #is because he feels a level of insecurity in his connection to her caused by the lack of shared/reciprocated biting #you know now that has me wondering if that's part of why other purebloods frown so heavily upon the idea of a pureblood/human couple #basically because they can't fulfill the most basic tenet of what it means to be coupled in that community's perception #yeesh ikevamp really went 'welcome to normative vampire politics' and im like 'I Am So Normal About This. (lie + analyzes)'

[staticart]

Day 11: Future

Don't mind the lad in the back, he's just taking a nap.. in some jam

#art #myart #skulduggery pleasant #skulduggery pleasant art #cadaver cain #skultober #the things i would do for him #BARK BARK SIR #i am unwell #statics art