#somebody please i need to see the note Thing wrote for Tyler | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

holidaywishes · 4 years

Text

It Had To Be You L

Chapter Fifty: Bumper Cars

Summary: You knew the relationship had done all it could for the two of you but letting go of him still hurt so much that you couldn’t breathe. After about two years, you were finally feeling like you were over him but when you run into him in Barcelona one summer, you feel your heart break all over again.

Warning: Angst and crying, so much crying, fluff in the most pure way

Author’s Note: Here it is everyone, the Finale. The last chapter in this series that I never intended to go more than 15 chapters with on the outside. I wanted to explain something about why I ended these two. I’m a sucker for big movie relationships and big movie moments. The kind where the couple end up together against all odds and it’s all romantic and the lighting is beautiful and the music is amazing and everyone is cheering for them because FINALLY! They chose each other. I love those moments and, for a long time, I was leaning to end this series in that direction. But when I looked back at the chapters and who these characters were in each one, I realized it was insane for them to be together. With all of (Y/N)’s insecurities and Tyler’s unwillingness to commit to growing up, the two of them wouldn’t last a month in real life. I thought about it a lot before I wrote the previous chapter. Trust me, I had two drafts made up and the one I put out was what made more sense. Because when you think about it, if you had friends like this, that were a couple like this, you’d tell them that it was incredibly dysfunctional and that they deserved better. Because everyone deserves better than just being with someone because you loved them once and maybe you’ll love them again. Relationships like this, that I created for these two, are toxic and, I don’t know, I guess I wanted this series to end on an optimistic but still realistic note. That you can love so deeply, so completely, and fall in love so fast, that you fall out of it just as fast. It doesn’t have to be a bad thing but staying in something when it’s bad for you, is not what you should be trying to do. So, I apologize if everyone wanted to see these two together after everything they’ve been through together and apart, but I hope this somehow puts your concerns at ease a little.

Song Credit: Bumper Cars -- Alex & Sierra

masterlist

the other masterlist

Tyler’s P.O.V.

You couldn’t seem to stop the tears flowing from your eyes while you crumpled in your moms arms.

“Ty, baby, I am so sorry...” your mom tried comforting you as the crowd around you stayed unchanging, not knowing what to say or do. You tried to say something but your violent sobs stopped any words from escaping your throat

“I--” you heard a voice stutter from behind you while the sound of footsteps came closer to you, “I’m sorry, Tyler. She just-- I can’t-- I’m sorry.” Chris stammered as he put a hand on your shoulder; your body rejecting his comfort by pushing away his hand

“Leave,” you yelled between sobs, “go. Chase after her. I don’t want you here and I don’t care how sorry you are that this girl you raised turned out to be awful and horrible and cruel.”

“Tyler...” Candace tried

“Don’t Candace!” you yelled again, “don’t try to defend her. Not now! LEAVE CHRIS! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU STILL DOING HERE?!” He finally walked toward his car with Karen following behind him, her head dropped to the ground.

“Why would she do this?” you heard her say to Chris as they got into the car and he just shook his head. You could see the sadness in their faces, clearly confused at the events that just unfolded.

“I need everyone to leave!” You yelled at the people around you, “I need to be alone for a bit.” You waited for a while for the crowd to disburse but when they remained where they were, your anger overcame you, “GET THE FUCK OFF MY PROPERTY BEFORE I CALL THE POLICE!” As the guests ran to their cars and your family looked at you with sympathy in their eyes, you ran inside the house, coming across little pieces of (Y/N) with every step you took. You stopped dead centre of the room to catch your breath as Marshall, Cash and Gerry circled at your feet and Lionel stared out the door waiting for (Y/N) to come back for him.

“She’s not coming back, Lionel,” you said angrily, tears falling from your eyes again when the small Australian Shepherd looked back at you, “she left. She didn’t want me.” The anger rushed over you again and you began tearing apart the living room; flipping chairs and tables and destroying everything around you.

“Tyler...” You heard your mom whisper from the doorway, staring at you in disbelief and you were forced to look at the destruction around you. When your eyes scanned the room, you noticed an envelope near the desk that must have fallen out of one of the drawers; realizing it must have been from (Y/N) when you saw your name written neatly in black ink.

“What’s that?” Cassidy asked as she walked slowly toward you and your eyes began to burn from the tears that brimmed when you looked up at your sister

“Uhmm..” you cleared your throat when you tried to answer her, looking back at the envelope, “it’s her writing. (Y/N)’s. It must be from her but I have no idea what it’s gonna be...”

“Do you want us to open it?” Candace said from the doorway, awaiting your response

“No.” You stated, taking the note and walking into the bedroom where you were surrounded by the remains of the Bridal Party; make up covered the counters and silk robes littered the floor while flower petals were scattered over the entire room. You ignored the mess and sat down at the end of the mattress, preparing yourself to read whatever words your ex-fiancée had put to paper.

Tyler;

If you’re reading this, then I ran away again.

The first sentence you read already made your blood begin to boil that you threw your head back and dropped your hands, still gripping the letter, before continuing to read what she had to say

Tyler;

If you’re reading this, then I ran away again. I loved you every minute that I was with you and the life that we made together was beautiful. And I know that it could’ve been beautiful if I had stayed and tried. But you deserve so much more than what I was capable of giving you.

This was not an easy decision to make. Accepting your proposal was exciting and I felt so much love for you and from you in that moment that I could clearly picture our life together; growing old and yelling at kids on our porch. But when you postponed the wedding and lied to me about the girl from your Bachelor Party, I realized I had to think about whether or not we’re good for each other anymore. And if I’m gone, then I guess it means we’re not.

I love you. I have loved you. I will continue to love you until my heart stops beating. Once it heals from the brokenness that I’ve forced upon it, I will love you again. And again. And again. I know this doesn’t make a lot of sense right now because, if I loved you, why would I run away, right? Well here’s the only answer I can come up with right now:

I don’t know who I am without you.

Normally, that would mean that I should stay and be with you because being without you would mean I was lost. Wouldn’t it? But I think I’ve been lost my whole life. Trying to find myself in the people I date or the friends I have or the people I surround myself with in one way or another. I don’t know who I am. I never have. I know I’ve never been comfortable in my own skin and we both know how damaging that can be when your life is as public as it is. It’s something that would’ve constantly got in the way.

My heart is breaking with every word I write to you and I don’t know when you’ll find this letter, but if ever you do, know that you were the best part of my life and I wouldn’t change a single moment of our time together. Trust me when I say I wish I could’ve known you sooner, met you earlier, loved you immediately so we could start our life together right away. Because, as Harry said to Sally, when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible. But the truth is, we didn’t meet earlier, we didn’t fall in love right away, it took us a while to find each other and, even then, it didn’t always ‘fit.’ I’m not saying it should’ve been easy but there were definitely times, I’m sure you can agree, when it wasn’t working.

I’m sorry for everything I’ve put you through, the pain I’ve caused you and the pain I’m causing you now. I promise it will pass. I promise you’ll find happiness again. I promise you deserve the love I know you’ll find and I promise you will find that love. Maybe by the time you’ve found this letter, you’ll have found the love you truly deserve or maybe you’ll still be looking for it. Either way, I promise you it will come to you and you will be so unbelievably happy. Because you deserve that. And I want that for you.

I know you hate me right now. I get that and I accept that. This is an awful, horrible, hurtful, painful thing I did to you, so please, hate me. Hate me for leaving you, for humiliating you, for wasting your time and money and getting your family involved. You can hate me forever if you need to and I’ll understand that. I hope you won’t but I’ll understand if you do. Someday, I hope that we’ll meet again and can be friendly to each other, I hope that our hearts will have healed and that we’ve both moved on. I don’t know when that day will be or if you’ll ever be able to forgive me but for what it’s worth, I look forward to that day.

I love you and I’m sorry.

Goodbye xx,

(Y/N)

You fell back onto the mattress, crumpling the letter in your hand as you took in the words she had written. Suddenly, you let out a long, low growl before sitting back up.

“What the fuck am I supposed to do with this?!” you said to Gerry who seemed to follow your growl from the other room, “does she just think I’m going to forgive her, Ger?” The yellow lab rested his head on your knees while you talked your feelings out. “She’s damn right I hate her. She’s damn right she humiliated me. She’s damn right I deserve better. She’s damn right I’m in pain. She’s damn right I’ll move on and find happiness!” You stopped suddenly when the three other dogs made their way to you and you caught Lionel’s sad expression that seemed to mirror yours, “But I really wanted that happiness with her...”

“Ty..?” Candace called softly, knocking the door frame when she saw you with the dogs, “can I come in?”

“I don’t want to talk about her if you’re going to defend her” you argued

“I won’t talk at all if you don’t want me to but I want to be here for you.” She admitted and you outstretched your hand to her, handing her the letter for her to read. Her eyes quickly skimmed the page as she read (Y/N)’s goodbye, “she knew she was going to leave?”

“I don’t think so...” you said, “I think this was like.. a fail safe. Like if she got too overwhelmed, she was gonna take off but didn’t want me to think badly of her...”

“What she did was wrong” Candace stated and you looked over at her only to find her eyes puffy and red. Just then, it hit you. (Y/N) was one of her best friends. They’d been that way before you and (Y/N) had even started dating and now Candace was forced to say goodbye to someone she loved so dearly; this was hurting her almost as much as it was hurting you

“Why don’t you talk to her?” you asked, nudging her shoulder, “I can’t. I won’t. It hurts too much. But you’re her friend. She’s your friend. I don’t want you to hate her just because she did this to me...”

“She didn’t just do it to you though”

“She did.”

“I’m so mad at her, for this. For leaving you, for hurting you and mom. For embarrassing us and everyone in the Wedding Party. I hate her!”

“No you don’t,” you chuckled at her words, trying to reassure her, “and that’s okay! Talk to her. Okay?”

“Okay.”

Candace’s P.O.V

You only intended to pick up the phone, ask why she did it, tell her you never wanted to see or hear from her again and then hang up. But when her voice fell flat on the other line, you could feel the pain and wanted to let her explain

“We hadn’t been good in a while. I mean...” she started, “we really were just faking it. I don’t think it would’ve lasted very long and I always wanted to only be married once...”

“But why couldn’t you have pulled him aside? Instead of leaving him standing there alone at the altar... After both of you said your vows?”

“I panicked.” She blurted out, her voice quivering, “honestly, I know it’s awful to keep saying but... I ran into Kate as she was making her way to the ceremony and I didn’t even know she was going to be there. I didn’t know we had sent her an invitation. I knew I didn’t, which meant that Tyler did. Or someone invited her verbally. I was just shocked when I saw her you know? And I guess it brought up a bunch of shit. I’m sorry. I wish it didn’t turn out that way, you have no idea how much I wish I could change it but I can’t.”

“I thought it wasn’t about her”

“It wasn’t”

“So why did seeing her bring up a bunch of shit?”

“I just kept thinking ‘if he lied about inviting her to the wedding, what else did he lie about? How much as he been keeping from me? Does he really want to settle down or is this just some game to him?’” She rambled shakily for a moment before you finally spoke again

“He’s miserable you know”

“I know”

“He’s making the dogs miserable too.” You added, a thought crossing your mind but you weren’t sure if you should even say it because you didn’t think she’d actually do what you were thinking, “you’re not leaving Lionel too are you?”

“Of course not!” she said, a slight rise in her volume but her voice was far from steady, “I just couldn’t spend any more time there. I had to let him stay there until I could come back for him. And so he could say goodbye to Tyler. And so Ty..ler” she corrected herself from using the shortened version of your brothers name, “could say goodbye too.”

“Tyler can’t even look at him. It’s so depressing.”

“What am I supposed to do? If I go there now, we’ll fight and yell and cry and I don’t want that. Not for me and not for him.”

“Well, honestly, I think you need to let him decide what he wants this time. You took off! You don’t get to make the big decisions anymore. Let him decide how he wants to handle it”

“Fine,” she agreed, “but how do I do that? I doubt he’s going to want to talk to me.”

“Let me talk to him and I’ll text you what he says...” You ended the call there and went back to your brother, who you found throwing the letter in the small trash bin by the Vanity in the bathroom.

“How do you want to..” you started but were unsure of how to finish your sentence

“I don’t want to talk to her, I told you that.”

“I know,” you sighed, “but what about Lionel? Technically, he’s her dog. How do you want to handle that situation?”

“Obviously I’m not going to keep her from her dog. She shouldn’t have left him here. Tell her to come get him.”

“Okay...” you hesitated, “but.. when? Do you want to be here for that? Do you want one of us to be here for that? Do you want to tell her you’re leaving him alone for two minutes until she gets there to pick him up? What?”

“I--” he stammered, trying to figure it out himself, “I don’t want to be here for it. I’ll say goodbye to him. Have tonight with him and she can pick him up tomorrow. You can be here but I don’t think Mom should be here. Cassidy’s a wild card so that’s up to you.” You nodded before he pushed past you to head out into the hallway, checking to see if anyone was still there, dismissing them when he found anyone in sight. You sent (Y/N) a text as you watched your brother turn the couch back to its legs and collapse onto it with his head in his hands. You weren’t sure he was ever going to be the same and you couldn’t really blame him; you just hoped he wouldn’t be broken for the rest of his life.

The next day, (Y/N) showed up to pick up Lionel and say goodbye to Cash, Marshall and Gerry.

“I’m so sorry guys,” she said as she hugged each of the labs, “I wish I didn’t have to leave you but I do. I made a horrible mistake and I have to live with it. Maybe one day, we’ll all meet again in the park but for now I have to say goodbye...” You watched her eyes tear up as she said goodbye to Tyler’s dogs

“They really do love you, don’t they?”

“I guess we’ve gotten close,” she smiled before putting on Lionel’s leash and taking a deep breath, “I should go. We should go...”

“Can we just talk for a second?” you said suddenly, stopping her from walking out the door. The two of you sat on the couch uncomfortably for a few minutes in silence, breaking only to say how upset you were, “I don’t know what to do...”

“What do you mean?”

“About us. We’re best friends and I love you but I hate you for what you did. I don’t know if I want to lose you but I don’t know if I can keep you a secret from Ty..” She shook her head as you tried to explain yourself

“Candace, Candace,” she said, putting her hands on yours to calm you, “choose him. It will suck to lose you because I love you too but I screwed up and I need to give him as much space as he needs. If that means that we have to... lose each other then I guess that’s what has to happen.” You furrowed your brow at her confession, looking down at Lionel and the three labs, trying to decide if you should speak or not and she seemed to notice your dilemma, “Look, I messed up. I humiliated your brother and your family. I tried to force my relationship with Tyler to last even when I knew we should’ve cut our losses a long time ago...” she sighed before continuing, “I loved him, that was real. I just don’t think we’re right for each other and I don’t want to hurt him anymore than I already have. You guys are like family to me and I will miss you more than you could possibly imagine but I’ve caused too much trouble. I’m sorry, Candace, but we both know you have to choose Tyler.”

“Why did you have to do this?” you laughed and she smiled weakly at you before you pulled her in for a hug and let her go. It was like a movie, watching her walk away with Lionel into the sunset, and it was a bittersweet moment; she turned when she got to her car, putting Lionel in the backseat and catching your stare before waving goodbye to you.

Two years later

“Alright! Everything is ready to go! Lionel, are you ready to get on your first ever plane?” you cooed at your Australian Shepherd as you gathered your luggage into the Uber. You met up with Lucy and Ethan at the airport, stopping off at an airport bar where Lionel could lay down beside you before they called your flight.

“So...” Ethan started, “you guys excited?”

“YES!” Lucy exclaimed first, “I just got promoted at work so this kind of feels like a celebration trip for me”

“Oh that’s awesome!” you and Ethan said simultaneously

“Congrats Luce!” You added, raising your glass to clink theirs

“Thank you, thank you” she laughed, pretending to bow

“Well, on my end, I’m just excited to be getting out of the city. I mean don’t get me wrong, it’s nice to be back here, in Calgary,” you said, gesturing around you with a smile, “but being home just kind of concretes my failures...”

“Hey.. no don’t do that,” Ethan tried, “you didn’t fail. You made the right call, in your heart. Plus you’ve been dating right?!” he smiled, raising his eyebrows to get you to talk about the dates you’d been on

“Oh yeah...” you sighed, raising your eyebrows before taking a long sip of your drink, “In the last year and a half, I’ve been on three dates. With different guys. And they all sucked. The first guy got me drunk and groped me when we were making out, none of that was good. I mean, if he had at least been a good kisser, it would’ve been different but he wasn’t. The second guy was one of the most pretentious guys I’ve ever met. Constantly talking about his favourite philosophers and why his favourite activity on dates is to talk about ethics. That one ended almost as soon as it began. The third one was decent. He didn’t try feeding me alcohol or telling me cheesy pick up lines or acting like he was better than me in some way. He was pretty true to his profile...”

“So what happened?” Lucy asked, confusion covering her face

“He hated dogs...” The three of you laughed and you shook your head as you finished the last sip in your glass, “no but I just don’t think I’m ready to date right now...”

“That’s fair” Ethan said, just as your flight was called for boarding and the three of you made your way to the line. Luckily, the flight was non-stop but it was still almost 13 hours and everyone was in desperate need of walking around when the plane landed.

“Alright! Where should we go first?!” Lucy asked excitedly, encouraging the group to perk up

“Apartment” Ethan replied tiredly

“We gotta drop this stuff off Luce and get Lionel some food” you added

“Fine fine... but I think we have to keep moving so we can beat the jet lag!” You snickered before grabbing your bags and making your way into the cab in front of you. You watched the trees pass you by with Lionel resting on your lap until you got closer into the city, where the colours of the buildings near the port seem to jump vibrantly in front of you. When the four of you finally got to your Air B’n’B, Ethan dropped his bags loudly on the floor while you and Lionel explored the apartment.

“Has your Portuguese improved since you went to Ibiza?” Lucy laughed

“Ibiza?” you said with a sigh of confusion on your tongue, completely locking away the memory of the trip when you and Tyler had officially started dating, “oh.. no. That was years ago...” Ethan and Lucy looked back and forth between each other as you looked at some of the host’s books on the shelf, zoning out from what you were saying, snapping back when you heard the clicking of Lionel’s paws approach you, “so.. I haven’t had a reason to brush up on it. But maybe while we’re here?” Ethan nodded at you, his eyebrows raised as he attempted to reassure you

“Get your pup some water and some food and then we’re going to explore!” Lucy said, clapping her hands together to encourage you and Ethan to hurry up. The time had finally come for you and your friends to take Lionel on an ‘almost too-touristy’ adventure and he was more pumped than your sister, which only shocked you slightly. The four of you made your way to The Basílica de la Sagrada Família, but didn’t go in on account of the dog, before making your way to the beautiful Park Güell for a nice stroll and stopping at a nearby café for a break from the heat.

“I love the Barcelona sun,” Lucy said as she fanned herself while you and Ethan laughed between each other’s glances, “don’t you?”

“It is beautiful here” you added

“I’m just glad there’s some shade!” Ethan exclaimed, “I burn easy.”

“So where to next?” Lucy asked as she opened her phone, completely ignoring any need for yours or Ethan’s opinion

“She’s a woman on a mission” you joked to Ethan

“Casa Milà it is!” she finally said, making everyone, including Lionel, snap their heads up. You sipped your drink while soaking up the beautiful Barcelona sun and relishing the breeze that came along every once in a while -- it had been so long since you’d been anywhere but Calgary, Toronto or Dallas that you forgot how much you missed travelling. When you finally made it to Casa Milà, all you wanted was to explore every inch of it. It was amazing and you were fascinated but Lionel was starting to get tired, which was hard to miss since he kept laying down whenever you tried to walk any further so you ordered an Uber and made your way back to the apartment.

“WAIT!” Ethan shouted, “can you let us off here please?”

“What’s going on?” You asked, concerned, “I really should take Lionel home. Look at his little tired face..” You cooed, trying to get Ethan to stay in the car

“The arch!” he shouted again

“We can see that tomorrow or later. I’m sure it’ll be beautiful at night all lit up,” Lucy tried, eventually turning to the Uber driver to ask him his thoughts, “you agree right?”

“sim, Certo...” he replied and she shook her head

“See... he agrees!” Lucy said, “I think we should give the poor guy a break from all this walking and heat. Don’t you?”

“We need some pictures in front of it in the daytime. When you can actually see our faces... and our outfits... without the awful flash of an iPhone...”

“We can do that tomorrow.. when we’re not all sweaty” Lucy argued

“We totally can!” Ethan replied, some excitement to his tone but you could spot the sarcasm a mile away, “OR... we could do it today and if we don’t like the pictures, we can come back!”

“Ethan.” Lucy stated, “the dog is tired. I’m so full I can barely walk. I’m sweating through everything I’m wearing and I’m ready to give into this jet lag”

“COME O--” He continued to argue

“ENOUGH!” you interrupted with a laugh, “Okay. I agree with Lucy. I’m sweaty, I’m tired, I just wanna take care of my dog and maybe hang out by the pool for a bit. I do think the Arch would be beautiful at night.”

“There you go!” Lucy exclaimed as if she’d won

“BUT!” You continued, “I’d hate if we said we were going to do it another day and didn’t end up getting around to it when we were so close today. We can order another Uber after we get a couple shots. It’s really not a big deal”

“AWESOME!” Ethan shouted in excitement, you apologized to the driver and thanked him for his patience before following your friends out to the Arc De Triomf. Standing there, in front of the arch, you felt a sudden tinge of sadness when you realized that this was one of Tyler’s favourite places, one of his favourite cities that he’d always talked about taking you to that you never got around to, and you knelt down in front of Lionel to stop the tears from showing

“Are you okay?” Lucy asked when she noticed you’d stopped moving with them

“I’m fine,” you said, smiling to hide the quiver in your voice, “I just needed to fix my shoe...” Lucy could tell you were lying, so she knelt down in front of you

“What’s wrong?” she asked in a whisper and you looked over to see where Ethan was, answering her question when she saw him taking pictures

“I forgot.. or maybe I tried to push it aside. How much Tyler loves Barcelona. How he would come here in the summer. How we promised we’d find our way here. Together.” You replied, small teardrops falling from the corner of your eye, “Then I went and ruined everything...”

“Uhm.. guys...” Ethan called to you, stopping briefly when he saw the two of you kneeling on the ground, “you ready to go?” You tried to discreetly wipe away the tears before he could see

“We didn’t even get a picture!” you laughed, standing up and Lionel began to bark, “Lionel! Shh!” you tried to quiet him but he continued

“Lionel that’s not nice! No barking!” Lucy took her turn trying to calm the dog and Ethan joined shortly after but he began to tug on the leash

“Lionel!” you raised your voice but he continued to bark and tug on the leash, “I don’t know what’s going on. He only does this when he sees someone he knows...” The realization of your words forced you to look up and your grip on the leash loosened just enough for Lionel to run in his direction. Lucy noticed Ethan drop his head before her eyes followed Lionel

“Shit” Lucy whispered as quietly as she could before turning back to see your eyes wide as you stared across the square

“Let’s go babe, Lucy will grab Lionel. Let’s just get in a cab and go back to the apartment”

“Maybe we’re just all hallucinating” you said, knowing it wasn’t the truth but hoping it was

“Maybe...” Ethan said, trying to comfort you, “come with me... Lucy has the pup, don’t worry.” He wrapped an arm around your shoulders to guide you to the cabs lining the street

“Ethan...” you stopped, squeezing your eyes shut tight and shaking your head, “we’ve seen him. He’s seen us. Lionel ran to him. We can’t just leave and ignore the fact that we’re both here... As much as I’d like to”

“Are you sure?” he asked, taking his arm off

“No” you laughed before turning around and making your way across the square

“Hi...” Kate greeted while Tyler focused on Lionel and you only nodded in her direction

Ethan’s P.O.V

“So.. you two huh?” you asked Kate as she stood awkwardly in front of you

“Ethan...” Lucy said, shaking her head at you while (Y/N) uncomfortably shifted where she stood

“Yeah...” Kate started, smiling weakly at you and (Y/N), “enjoying Barcelona?” you scoffed

“Ethan stop,” (Y/N) finally spoke, “we didn’t mean to interrupt. Lionel just recognized you and wanted to say hi...” Tyler stood up, a scowl on his face that even you could tell was covering up a little bit of hurt behind his eyes and the group waited for him to speak; the tension growing with every passing second.

“I hope you enjoy your time here...” was all he said before taking Kate’s hand and walking away, leaving Lionel whining and (Y/N) as paralyzed as ever.

“What a bitch!” You said, referring to Kate, thinking it’s what your friend needed

“Stop...” (Y/N) said quietly, pathetically, before pulling Lionel slightly toward the cabs, “I’m exhausted. I want to go back to the apartment.” The ride back was painfully silent but all you could do was wait for (Y/N) to speak first; the creaking of the floorboards in the apartment felt like bombs to you and Lucy as (Y/N) still hadn’t muttered a word and even Lionel’s tapping paws sounded sad.

“We’re just going to go grab a drink at the café next door... you take a nap or a bath and we’ll see you later okay?” Lucy spoke up, grabbing your arm to leave her sister alone but not soon enough to miss the whimpers coming from the bedroom, forcing you and Lucy to stare at each other with heavy hearts.

“What are we supposed to do?” you asked when the two of you sat down at a table, “I mean do we leave? do we get her so incredibly drunk that she forgets he’s here? I mean she’s never going to forget he exists -- getting her that drunk is impossible...”

“We just have to be there for her...” Lucy added, realizing that was the opposite of where the two of you were, “even if we’re not there for her.”

“It just sucks that he was with Kate...” you said, “I mean with his friends, it would’ve been hard enough. But to see Kate there with him. Taking pictures and holding hands. I just about crumbled I felt so bad for her.”

“I know,” Lucy sighed, fiddling with the menu in front of her, “but the thing is... it’s not her problem anymore. She’s allowed to be hurt, we’re not going to tell her she can’t hurt, but she can’t expect Tyler to... not find love ever again.”

“But so soon?” you exclaimed, “and with her?!”

“It’s been two years.” she stated, “And honestly, it probably wouldn’t have been with anyone other than Kate. We all saw it coming..”

“Maybe. I still hate her. I hate him for it.”

“She left him though,” Lucy interjected, trying to get you to settle your emotions, “he’s not the one in the wrong here. Look, I love my sister and I understand why she did what she did. It was the right choice, even if it hurt like hell for the both of them. But she doesn’t own him and she doesn’t have any stake in his life anymore. We can’t hate Tyler for moving on and we can’t hate Kate for being there for him when he needed someone...”

“I hate your logic” you said, scoffing at her sarcastic pout

“Honestly? me too.”

You cried yourself to sleep with Lionel tucked into the back of your knees, waking up only to discover that Lucy and Ethan hadn’t returned. Which meant you were left alone with your thoughts which was a dangerous place to be. You sat up and Lionel moved so he could face you, to which you stared at him and cried as he looked back

“I miss him so much, Li,” you sobbed, “I don’t know what to do...” you dropped your head against the Australian Shepherd’s neck and hugged him while your tears coated his fur. “He was supposed to be... my dude. My person. and he was. Why did I fuck this up so hard?” You asked your dog as violent sobs hurled out of your chest, leaning back to look at Lionel only for him to lick away your tears and you laughed at the action, “I love you too, bud.” Finally, you got out of bed and decided to take a shower to wash the grief off, thinking about how to make this trip enjoyable knowing that Tyler and Kate were in the same city; probably doing the romantic things he’d promised you so many years ago. When it was clear to you that you owed Ethan and Lucy your undivided attention and apology for acting so selfish, you sent them a text to ask what café they were at and made sure Lionel had enough food and water that he wouldn’t get agitated while you were out.

“When you come out of the building, turn left and then when you get to the corner, turn right and then keep walking for about a block,” Lucy texted, “It’s called Firebug.” You had every intention of meeting them there but for some reason, when you got into the cab, you asked the driver to take you to the Arc De Triomf. When you got there, you were surprised how few people were surrounding it but you were instead able to enjoy the beauty of it with the quiet whirring of traffic around you. The moment was perfect that you asked a stranger to take a picture of you in front of the beautiful city sculpture before turning to just be in the moment for a second.

“I thought you might come back here...” Tyler’s voice rang through your ears and chilled your spine as he stood behind you

“I didn’t...” you stood still, facing away from him, unsure of whether or not to look at him

“I shouldn’t have left without saying something,” he added, referring to your encounter earlier, “I was just shocked to see you.”

“I know...” you whispered

“Can’t even look at me huh?” He scoffed, “that’s where we’re at now?”

“If I look at you, I think I might cry and I have such a huge headache from crying already...” you said shakily

“You don’t think I haven’t cried a million times over that day?”

“You think it’s just about that day?!” you yelled, finally turning to him to see him raising his eyebrows at you, “maybe it’s just about that day for you. And I’m sorry. Did you read the note?” The words came out of your mouth harsher than you intended and he scoffed at you before answering

“Yeah. I found the note you hid in the drawer”

“I didn’t think I’d actually have to give it to you, Tyler, so I just kind of forgot about it.”

“Like you forgot about me?”

“Forgot about you?” you said, contorting your face in confusion, “how the hell did I forget about you? I don’t think me writing a note to you in case I left constitutes as me forgetting about you. In fact, it’s the opposite!”

“You forgot that I was there to help you! Everything had to be about you helping you. Not asking anyone for help! We were supposed to be there for each other! BUT YOU COULDN’T DO THAT!!”

“DON’T YELL AT ME!” you shouted, “Tyler, I’m sorry. I hated writing that note but if I left, and I didn’t know that I was going to believe me, but if I did I thought you deserved some kind of explanation. Even if it was a shitty one.”

“Fine.” He said, throwing his hands up in the air before rubbing his face, “but why did you do it in the first place?”

“The note?”

“Leave...” you could see the sadness looming in his eyes, the way his tears were beginning to brim his eyes and you tilted your head to the side to stop yourself from sobbing too quickly

“Because...” you started, a sigh escaping your lips as it had so many times before, “I loved you first.” You stated it so matter-of-factly that the expression on his face seemed to say ‘what does that mean?’ “I didn’t want a relationship. Not with anyone. I didn’t really know what love was and I didn’t want to waste my time in another relationship trying to find it. Especially not with someone who’s reputation walked into a room before he did. But when I wasn’t with you, when I was just starting to get to know you, I wanted to be around you. I wanted to figure you out. Find out if you were who everyone said you were. And then James came into my life and he seemed like the guy that everyone told me to wait for. He was charming and fun and sweet and chivalrous and he texted me that night and called me the next day and he paid for my meals and he made me feel like I mattered. Until he didn’t. Even with all that, there was something missing and I could never really love him. I didn’t know why, truly, I couldn’t figure out why I couldn’t let myself fall in love with this seemingly perfect guy. And it was because of you. Because I loved you first. Because you were always on my mind. Because you weren’t perfect but you made me laugh and you understood that I was messed up and you comforted me the best you could and you just.. tried. That’s why It Had To Be You because anyone else would have to do more than you did without even realizing it which would never work because I shouldn’t be comparing other people to you.”

“That doesn’t make sense. If you loved me first, why would you leave?” He questioned

“I wanted to be with you and I thought you wanted to be with me. But the more we tried, the more things got in the way. Ali, James, Marcus, Hockey... all of these things that made it impossible for us to match up at the right time. And for a while, it just seemed like bad timing. But we were just like...” you bumped your fists together as you tried to find the words, “we were like Bumper Cars. We would get so close and then we would crash apart but we tried to fight to be next to each other, as if one of us could ‘beat the system’ because the spark is there between us but it just causes destruction. Every time. And one or both of us would get hurt. I was tired of hurting you, Tyler.”

“Why did you wait so long then? I mean you couldn’t have just all of a sudden felt this way on our wedding day...” he added

“No.. it had been building up for a while. Little things made me think about it. But I thought that we were stronger than my insecurities; it turns out that as much as I wanted to be with you, I wanted you to be happier more. When Kate showed up that day, it made me realize...”

“Nothing was happening with us then” he interrupted, raising his voice suddenly.

“I know. But I realized that maybe she was just a friend, someone who was good to you, and you had to keep that a secret from me because of all of this stuff I was conjuring up in my mind. Which just felt like the opposite person I wanted to be. I thought I was this girl who you’d be able to trust with anything. That you’d know was cool with you having girls for friends and that would be fine with you going out with your guys on the weekends or whatever. But I wasn’t. Your inviting her there, without me knowing, proved that.” He sighed loudly at your confession and you didn’t know what to think. Honestly, you were surprised he had let you explain this much; you thought he would’ve just yelled at you for running away like a child

“Maybe you’re right,” he said when he finally calmed down and the tears burning your eyes overcame you that you couldn’t control any longer, “I was never trying to fix you. I didn’t think you needed to be fixed. But you did. And I was never going to be able to convince you otherwise. So, I tried to keep you happy and secure but things popped up and I got, I don’t know... overwhelmed at the idea of having to be strong all the time for both of us. But I wanted to marry you. I wanted to be happy. With you.”

“Tyler...” you said as your tears seemed to settle down, taking a deep breath so you could continue, “I wanted to marry you, too. I only ever wanted to be happy with you but you have to admit. When I left, and you hated me for what I did, you realized that you could start over...”

“I didn’t want to start over though. You made that choice for me!” he raised his voice and you stepped back, breathing in silently

“You were too good of a guy to hurt me... the way I probably deserved to be hurt. Hating me, as twisted as it seems, was the easiest way for you to move on and find closure so you could find the person or the thing that made you find meaning in your life again. I mean, listen to everything you just said. Your life, our relationship, revolved around you trying to convince me that I was enough for you and that’s not fair to you. You should be with someone who’s secure enough in themselves that you two can live your separate lives and then come together and be whole. And I think you have that with Kate, and I’m so glad that you were able to find that happiness that you deserve. Because you seem happy. Are you? Happy?”

“I am...” he sighed, a smile creeping across his lips that broke your heart into a million pieces because you knew you wouldn’t be the one behind it anymore, “I mean, yeah, sometimes I have shitty days and get really sad when I think about us. You and me. But she.. brings me back”

“Good” you said almost inaudibly as tears began to fall from your eyes again, clearing your throat, “I’m so happy for you, Ty, and I wish you nothing but the best. In everything.”

“Thank you” he said sincerely, staring at you so intensely you could feel your heart in your head. Part of you wanted him to kiss you, just to say goodbye, but a bigger part wanted to keep as much distance between you and him as possible; from now until the day you died. When he leaned in to hug you, you melted into him before quickly jerking yourself away

“I’m sorry,” you stammered as you pulled away from him, shaking your head as you backed up, “I can’t do thi-- I have to go...”

“(Y/N)..” he said, trying to stop you from leaving, which you did just to hear what he had to say, “you will always be my favourite story.” You gave him a strained smile as you tried to hold back your tears until you turned away and he couldn’t see your face as you fell apart. You walked back toward the apartment where you had passed by Firebug in the cab earlier when you got a text from both Ethan and Lucy wondering where you are

“Did you get lost?” Lucy sent

“Everything okay?” Ethan asked

“We’re getting worried!”

“Did you decide to stay back at the apartment?”

“It’s okay if you didn’t wanna come out.. Just let us know”

“Babe?”

“Guys I’m okay,” you said when you walked into the café and found their table, “I went back to the Arch.” You handed them your phone so they could look at your pictures, “it was so peaceful tonight. Much more than during the day...”

“Why are your eyes all puffy?” Ethan asked

“Did you go there to cry?” Lucy chided, taking a sip of her Sangria

“No I didn’t go there to cry,” you laughed, “I went there to think. And then Tyler showed up.”

“What happened?” “What did he say?” The two overlapped their questions

“He wanted to talk so we talked...”

“And...?” Ethan prodded

“I cried” you stated with a giggle

“Well obviously,” Lucy scoffed, “but what else? Did he say he loves you and he’ll come back to you and leave Kate?”

“What?” your voice squeaked at her suggestions as a server asked if he could get you a drink, “can I just get a Coca-Cola please? Thank you. Obrigado.”

“(Y/N)!!” Ethan and Lucy shouted to get you to continue

“No. He didn’t say he loves me and he’ll leave Kate”

“WHY THE HELL NOT? THE BOYS AN IDIOT!” Lucy yelled, clearly the Sangria going to her head

“Luce, enough. Guys,” you sighed, sitting back in your chair, “it broke my heart to see them together. Like seriously, my heart shattered when I saw Lionel run to them and then she was just there... with him. Like it was the most natural thing in the world. But he’s happy. They’re happy. I wouldn’t have wanted him to leave her and come back to me even if he said he would. Because it’s over. We’re over and I’ll be okay with that eventually. Knowing that he’s finally found his person makes it, both, easier and harder. He was my favourite person and we both tried so hard but I think we found our closure.”

“That’s it?” Lucy said calmly, “you don’t think you’ll ever get back together?”

“No, Lucy, I don’t.” you stated, placing your hand gently on hers to ease the idea into her mind, “that’s not the way it works for us. Too much has happened for it all to be forgiven and forgotten. I will love him until my heart stops beating and I think a part of him will always love me, but our story is over...”

“That’s the most depressing thing I’ve ever heard” Ethan added, taking a sip of his Cava, displeased at your statement, and you laughed before taking a drink of your Coke that had been placed in front of you

“Maybe...” you continued, “but at least I know what love is now. You know? So the next time I find a guy and it doesn’t feel like it did with Tyler, I’ll know it’s not love and I’ll be able to make a decision as to whether or not I want to just waste my time or move on.”

“Very... mature?” Lucy questioned and you tipped your glass in her direction

“I wish it would’ve ended like a movie...” Ethan complained. You laughed as the two of them continued to drink before completely changing the topic. You smiled as your sister spilled Ethan’s drink all over him and he unenthusiastically ordered another drink. Your phone dinged once and you were surprised to see Tyler’s name light up your screen

“If you’re free tomorrow, I’m going out sailing. You should come by the Port before it leaves...” Your smile faded slightly as you contemplated answering him but instead you turned your phone on its screen, ignoring his message and promising yourself that you’d let him go and let the two of you move on. It was time for a new story...

#Tyler Seguin imagine #Tyler Seguin #Tyler Seguin fic #Tyler Seguin series #NHL imagine #nhl #NHL fic #NHL Series #It Had To Be You #It Had To Be You series #It Had to Be You Finale #Finale #last chapter #masterlist #the other masterlist

55 notes · View notes

yoddream · 4 years

Text

The Price to Pay | n.jm

pairing: jaemin x fem!reader

summary: when you’re given your dream job, what will happen to you and Jaemin?

warnings: ANGST, bad writing lmao, depression (not specifically mentioned but it’s obviously there), a shit ton of crying, jaemin being kind of an asshole ngl, mentions of hockey (only because there might be some things that don’t make sense idk maybe they do to somebody who doesn’t watch it), VERY INACCURATE INFO ON BECOMING A TRANSLATOR

notes: here’s part 2 to New Beginnings! idk how to link it lmao im sorry im really bad at this also im iffy on how this came out but at this point whatever i wrote a lot. I’m gonna try to do the bold for korean again (cuz new beginnings on the app is fucking jacked af but on the full website it looks how it’s supposed to) but like just assume that everything the OCs are saying are in Korean and whatever the Dreamies say that aren’t to English speaking people are in Korean

“Please put on your seatbelts as we will begin our descent to Los Angeles, California.”

You did as the flight attendant asked and looked out the window. The ground slowly got closer and closer, and your heart raced with excitement. Despite how you’d felt a year ago, you couldn’t wait to land and start the next chapter in your life. You could still feel the exhaustion from it being in the middle of the night in Seoul, but that was so little compared to all the emotions running through your body.

Once you were out of security, you pulled up FaceTime on your phone and called Jisung. It rang and rang, and you almost gave up when he finally answered the call. He was out of breath, as if he’d just run to get his phone. His face lit up when he saw yours.

“Y/N! You landed safely!” he said. Your parents appeared in the frame, which made you smile.

“I did! I’m heading towards pick-up now, so hopefully I’ll be on my way to the rink,” you told them.

You’d decided you wanted to be an English-Korean translator, so you had been hired as a translator for a new NHL prospect. He was born and raised in Korea, and he knew very little English, so you were going to help him during prospect camp, translating and teaching him English. You expected to be in America until September, but if he made it past both prospect and training camp, who knew what your future held?

“Oh honey, I’m so proud of you,” your mom said.

“We both are. You’re gonna do great, we know it,” your dad added.

You looked around and spotted your name on a sign that was held by a man with a driver’s cap. You told your family you had to go and hung up before walking over. He greeted you with a smile and grabbed one of your bags, heading to the parking lot. You shot a text to the boys, letting them know you’d landed. The drive to the rink didn’t take long, and you were escorted by a security guard through the hallways to an office.

“Ms. Park is here,” the security guard announced before heading back to his area.

“Y/N, it’s very nice to meet you. I’m Rob Blake, the general manager,” a very tall man in a suit said. He held his hand out to you, which you shook. “We’re very happy to have you here. Chi-won Han’s translator from last year has a new job, so we’re glad you can stay for longer.”

“Thank you, Mr. Blake. I’m very excited for this opportunity,” you stated with a wide smile. “So, where should we start?”

Mr. Blake’s assistant gave you multiple papers to sign before bringing you to get your ID made. You proudly hung it around your neck, even though your picture looked absolutely horrible (you just got off an eleven-hour flight). Then, Mr. Blake himself brought you to a conference room where the prospect, his agent, and the coaches were.

“Everyone, this is Y/N Park. She will be Chi-won’s translator.”

You bowed and said, “Han Chi-won, it’s nice to meet you. I’m Park Y/N.”

The boy bowed as well. “Thank you for flying here, Y/N. You have to idea how appreciative I am.”

You then introduced yourself to the agent and the coaches, dropping your bags to bow and shake hands. You told them about your exact role and how to contact you in case you were needed last minute. You’d been given a phone for work with everyone’s contacts in it, along with a rental car since you still had a valid driver’s license. You were then handed the keys to your apartment, which you would be sharing with Chi-won and one of the Kings’ players, Tyler Toffoli.

“Y/N, do you own any skates?” Marco Sturm, one of the assistant coaches, asked.

You shook your head. “I’m not very good at skating, but I’ll definitely do my best.”

“Have Tyler and Chi-won take you shopping for a pair. We really need you on the ice for drills.”

You translated for the hockey player when his head perked up at his name. He nodded shyly, his eyes darting to the floor. You couldn’t help but feel bad for him; he had no idea what anyone was saying, so for all he knew you could’ve been talking poorly about him. None of you would do that, but he didn’t know any better.

“Camp doesn’t officially start until tomorrow. We just wanted you to meet before then so that you can get situated. before the madness,” Mr. Blake explained.

“I appreciate that. It’s past midnight in Korea, so I’m pretty exhausted,” you replied.

“You guys are all set for today. We’ll see you bright and early tomorrow for day one.”

You turned to Chi-won and asked, “You wanna get food?”

He nodded vigorously, saying, “Tyler and his wife were making breakfast when I was called down here.”

Grabbing your bags, you said your farewells to the men before heading out, Chi-won hot on your feels. When you clicked the key fob for the rental car, a new SUV lit up. You let out a low whistle and popped the hatch, tossing your suitcases and duffel in. You and Chi-won then climbed in and decided on a local diner. The car ride was mostly silent, the radio playing softly in the background. When you walked into the restaurant, his eyes widened in fear as the waitress spoke to him. You ordered juice for the both of you and then started translating the menu with ease, watching his shoulders relax at the sound of a language he knew.

The two of you ate in silence for a couple minutes, simply enjoying your food. You checked your personal phone for any messages, but there was nothing. You weren’t surprised, though. The boys were supposed to be asleep, so you expected there to be nothing, but it still hurt to see that you hadn’t even heard from Jaemin. Then again, you probably should’ve expected as much.

“What?” Jaemin asked quietly.

You’d shown up at the dorms, wearing one of your boyfriend’s sweatshirts and a pair of shorts. Your hair was a mess from stressing out, so you had the hood up. He had to know what was going on, and you were out of time.

“I’m going back to America,” you repeated. “A major sports team contacted me last month to help one of their prospects. He doesn’t know much English, so I’ll be translating for him during camp.”

“When you do leave?”

“Tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?!” You flinched at the sudden rise of his volume, the sound bouncing off the walls. There was no way the other Dreamies hadn’t heard him. There was no way the other Dreames hadn’t heard him, and you started to panic. This was definitely not how you expected this to go. “You’ve known for a month, and you’re just telling me now?!”

“I was going to tell you sooner, but since you’re working on your comeback, you’ve had to cancel dates! I didn’t have a choice but to tell you now!” you argued.

“Oh, so now it’s my fault?”

“I didn’t say that, Jaemin. I’m just explaining that there wasn’t a good time, so that’s why you aren’t finding out until the day before my flight. I’m sorry it wasn’t sooner.” Your hands were wringing in the kangaroo pocket, but it was hidden by the island in the kitchen.

“How long will you be gone?” When you didn’t answer right away, his jaw clenched. “How long, Y/N?”

Scared by his tone, you said, “I have no idea. Prospect camp is for a few days, but they’re expecting him to continue on to training camp in September.”

“Are you even coming back? What does that mean for us?”

“I don’t know, Jae!” you snapped. Your voice reverberated off the walls, and you could hear shuffling down the hall. “I don’t know.”

There was a heavy pause. He then asked, “You don’t know if you’re coming back? Or you don’t know what will happen with our relationship?”

“Both.”

“You’re very young to be a translator,” Chi-won stated, snapping you out of your thoughts.

You wiped your mouth with a napkin, giving you time to think of your answer without revealing too much. “My step-dad is from Korea. He and my mom got married when I was nine, but he and my step-brother had to stay there while my mom and I live here. We would visit whenever there was a vacation for school, so I learned it over the years.”

“Do you live in Korea now?”

“Right in Seoul. I moved after I graduated high school last year.”

Chi-won was silent after that. After you paid the bill, you plugged in the address for the apartment building and made the quick drive over. Parking along the street, Chi-won grabbed your bags for you and led you to the apartment. You used the key to unlock the door and walked inside. A man and a woman looked over at the same time from the kitchen and smiled.

“You must be the translator. I’m Tyler, and this is my wife, Cat,” the man introduced.

You shook their hands and said, “It’s nice to meet you. My name’s Y/N Park.”

“Come right in. I’ll show you where your room is,” Cat offered.

You followed her down the hallway to a room that had grey walls, dark wooden floors, and a matching wooden dresser. There was a queen-sized bed with fresh sheets on it and a cream armchair in the corner. Identical nightstands stood on either side of the bed, and there was a bathroom attached to the bedroom.

“Make yourself at home. You look like you’re about to fall asleep standing up,” she joked.

“Yeah, I’m gonna take a quick nap, if that’s okay?” you asked.

“Go ahead.”

Cat closed the door behind her, leaving you alone. You collapsed onto the bed and checked to see if any messages had come in before you’d left the diner’s WiFi, but still nothing. Sighing, you put your phone on the nightstand and let your eyes close, the heaviness becoming too much to fight against.

When you woke up, the sun was high in the sky. You groaned as your arms stretched above your head. According to your phone, it was a little past noon, so you rolled out of bed and headed to the kitchen. Luckily, the password to the WiFi was on the refrigerator. As soon as your phone was connected, it started blowing up with messages and snapchats. The sudden sound made you jump, definitely waking you up. You took some time to respond to the boys and your parents, and it took you a few minutes to notice that none of the notifications were from Jaemin. Sighing, you shoved your phone into your pocket and went looking for Chi-won. You found him in his room, looking at an English book with furrowed brows.

“I’m not starting lessons until after prospect camp,” you said.

The boy jumped, clearly unaware of your presence until you announced it. He closed the book and placed it on the nightstand before looking around the room, avoiding your eyes. Sighing, you sat at the desk that was by the window.

“What’s on your mind?” you asked.

“What if I don’t make it past this camp?” he questioned.

You let out a deep breath and said, “Then you go back to your team in Korea, continue to train and practice, and then next year, you’ll come back. The exact same thing as what you went through last year.”

“What will happen to you?”

“I’ll go back home as well. I’m currently under contract with the team, so if you’re not here, I’m not needed. They’ll let me know when I am. You’re stuck with me.”

///

You and Chi-won walked into the practice rink the next morning, a fresh pair of skates in the duffel bag on your shoulder. You’d gone out with Tyler and Chi-won after dinner to buy them, just like Coach Sturm had told you to. The thought of being on the ice with a bunch of hockey players and falling on your ass was terrifying, but you didn’t have much of a choice.

You headed to the weight room and sat on a bench. Skating wouldn’t come until after they were done for the day, so your bag was simply dropped to the floor. You then pulled out your phone and looked at the last message you’d sent to Jaemin.

You: I know you’re upset, but I would love for you to be at the airport tomorrow.

He never showed up. Everyone else had, but he’d stayed at the dorms. The way the conversation had ended left the status of your relationship up in the air, and you were too scared to ask. Your anniversary was supposed to be in a little over a month, but you didn’t even know if that was something to be celebrated anymore.

The sound of the door opening behind you caught your attention. The players started filtering into the room, shooting odd looks your way. You stood up when Chi-won walked in, moving to his side for when the head strength and conditioning coach started talking.

After a speech, the coach came over and introduced himself, apologizing for missing the meeting the day before. When you assured him it was fine, he transitioned the conversation to the first test he wanted Chi-won to run through. You translated everything as you followed them to the bikes, not missing a single beat. You watched as he pedaled and pedaled, sweat dripping down his face as his leg muscles rippled from the rapid movement. You could hear the cheers of encouragement from the other prospects as they watched the others that were running through the tests.

When there was time for a break, Chi-won took the water bottle you handed him, draining it fairly quickly. He then grabbed the towel from your shoulder and wiped his face and neck, tossing it in the hamper in the corner. He looked around at the other prospects, watching them talk and laugh with each other. You felt bad knowing he wouldn’t take that first step. It was understandable, though. You’d gone through the same thing when you started making trips to Korea; you’d been surrounded by people who understood you as much as you understood them, which was not a lot.

After a few minutes, it was time for more testing. You followed the group around the weight room, mostly watching but translating when needed. Everyone’s eyes were on you whenever either of you spoke, but all your attention was on him and whoever was talking to him.

At the end of the day, Chi-won looked like he was about to drop at any moment. You decided to skip the skating and brought him back to the apartment, using the work phone since it could connect to data. He dozed in the car, his face finally relaxed. You’d never noticed how much tension was there until now. Between the stress of getting past this camp and not knowing what anyone was saying, his head was probably spinning.

When you entered the apartment, Chi-won immediately headed to his room to nap. There was a note from Tyler and Cat that they’d gone to run errands, leaving you alone. You tried to FaceTime your parents, but neither of them answered. You knew the others were rehearsing, so you called Mark, but he didn’t answer either. Feeling dejected, you headed to your room and sat in the armchair. You looked out the window and watched the world below, a sudden flashback to the day you and Jaemin were sitting in the mall’s food court. Your heart ached at the thought of one of the happiest days of your life, knowing there was a chance it was all over.

///

It was the last day of the four-day camp for prospects. You wobbled onto the ice as you tried to skate closer to Chi-won. He looked over and rolled his eyes before skating over, grabbing your arm, and dragging you to the group. A few of the players laughed, but you didn’t care. You would be laughing too if you’d seen it.

Yesterday, they’d run drills, so you got to see Chi-won on the ice for the first time, and you could see why he was their first-round pick the year before. However, the true test was the scrimmage scheduled for today. Drills could be run over and over until you got it right, but in a game if you made a mistake there was no going back.

Once the teams were split, Chi-won helped you to the bench. You could hear your personal phone ring with a FaceTime call, but you ignored it. It was most likely Jeno, calling to talk to you before he finally went to bed. He loved to call you before he went to bed, which annoyed Jaemin whenever you were on a call with your boyfriend. You wished you could answer, since you hadn’t had much interaction with anyone. You mostly translated back at the apartment, leaving you craving to talk to someone, but you felt too awkward talking to Tyler and Cat.

The scrimmage was exhilarating to even just watch. Chi-won was fast, despite how large he was. He wove through players, making fantastic plays. His stick work was quick, and he seemed to know where his teammates were, making passes without looking. There was no doubt in your mind that they were keeping him, but seeing the looks on the coaches faces made it that much better. Chi-won played fairly, probably too much; he always passed the puck for a goal instead of taking a chance himself.

During a break, Coach Sturm was going over a couple plays to Chi-won’s team. You translated as fast as you could, trying your best to make it sound clear and right. Hockey pretty much had its own language, so you assumed it was working when he nodded along. As he was about to head back onto the ice, you grabbed his attention.

“Shoot the fucking puck, man. You’ve made plenty of great passes. They want to see what you’re capable of.”

His eyes widened, but he nodded and bumped your held-out fist before skating back to the face-off. You watched the puck drop, and the game was on. Your eyes never left the player you were there for, his form zipping across the ice with a breakaway. He was denied, but you could tell there was a fire lit under his ass. There were still amazing passes, but he was taking shots on goal more. The goalie was just unbelievably good at his job,

There wasn’t much time left in the scrimmage when Chi-won was skating towards the goal, him against two defensemen. His feet moved in a way you couldn’t explain, and he slipped past the opposing players, taking a shot on goal. You nearly jumped with joy as it flew past the goalie’s shoulder, and you didn’t miss the smile on his face as he celebrated with his teammates.

At the end of the day, Chi-won was asked to dinner with some of the other prospects. He nodded his head with a grin, so they told you the restaurant. Your phone connected to the Bluetooth as you were typing it into the map, and “My First and Last” immediately started playing through the speakers. Chi-won sent a look your way but said nothing.

The other players made sure you and Chi-won had seats next to each other so you could easily translate for him. They asked him questions about his life in Korea and his teammates. He talked about his family, his girlfriend Eun-ji, and his friends. You were learning more about him by doing your job rather than conversing with him yourself. You could feel something heavy settle in your chest as they all talked to each other, only looking to you when you translated.

When you were back at the apartment, Chi-won collapsed onto the couch. You sat in an armchair and stared at the ceiling, thoughts of Jaemin running through your head. It’d been five days since you last heard from him, and you were still hesitant to reach out. He was probably in the same boat, but what if he didn’t want to hear from you? What if your relationship was over and you didn’t know it? You hadn’t talked to the other boys about it, not wanting to drag them into your drama.

“You’re thinking too loud,” Chi-won complained.

“Sorry,” you said quietly. “How do you think camp went?”

“I think I did well. My whole body hurts, though. I wish Eun-ji was here. She gives amazing back massages. I would be in constant pain if it wasn’t for her. I’m definitely the luckiest guy in the world.”

That’s what Jaemin tells me. “Is she gonna be starting college this fall?”

He nodded. “She wants to study sports medicine, so she’ll be studying at Seoul University. I’m so proud of her.”

You looked at the time on your phone before realizing that it was your work one. Your personal phone was still in your duffel, which was in the car. Cursing under your breath, you rushed downstairs and grabbed your phone from the bag.

Jaemin💕: 3 missed FaceTime video calls

Shit. Just in case your relationship wasn’t fragile enough, you’d missed three calls from him. It was the first time either one of you had tried reaching out since you stormed out of the dorms in tears. Worried, you headed inside and returned to the apartment as fast as possible. You tried calling Jaemin back, but he wasn’t picking up. It was about ten in the morning where he was, and he never slept in too much no matter what time he’d gone to bed, so you knew he was ignoring you. Trying again, you cursed and swallowed around the lump in your throat. He finally picked up, and he was not happy.

“Hey,” you said as you moved to your room.

“Hey. Where were you?” he asked.

“We were at camp, and then we went to dinner after,” you explained.

His eyebrows raised. “You went to dinner?”

“Yeah.”

“Was it a date?”

Your eyes widened in shock. “What the fuck, Jaemin? Of course it wasn’t a date! Why the hell would you ask that?”

“I mean, you did say you didn’t know how this would affect our relationship,” he snapped.

“That doesn’t mean I would cheat on you. God, do you really think that low of me?” You could feel the sting behind your eyes of tears forming, but you tried to hold them back.

“I don’t know what to think anymore, Y/N. You waited until the day before you were leaving to tell me about it—”

“I didn’t have a choice, and you know it!” you exclaimed. “You know what? I’m done. I can’t do this right now.”

You hung up and threw your phone across the room, muffling sobs into your hands. Being here, having the job you’ve worked towards the past year, it was supposed to be exciting, yet you were dealing with possibly the worst heartbreak yet, and you didn’t even know if there was a relationship to salvage anymore.

Your phone was ringing with a FaceTime call from Jisung, but you ignored it. He couldn’t see you like this; even though you were partially in the wrong in the fight, he would completely lose it and attack Jaemin. You didn’t want to be the cause of something happening to NCT Dream. It would have to stay to yourself, just like everything else about your life.

///

You’d been in America for two weeks, and you were absolutely miserable. You didn’t talk to the boys as much, ignoring some of their calls so that when you did answer, there was too much to talk about for you to think about Jaemin during the calls. You hadn’t talked to him since your last argument, and you didn’t know what to do. Jisung didn’t now, but it was clear he was suspicious of something. You just wanted to go home, but Chi-won had to stay in California for more training and practice. He’d been invited to training camp in September, so it was easier for him to just stay here until he knew his future with the team post-camp.

Chi-won’s English was improving a little, but it was clear he wasn’t confident in himself. Learning a language was hard, and English was one of the most difficult. From conjunctions to words sounding the same but being spelled different to even the sentence structure, you didn’t blame him for feeling self-conscious and frustrated. You had talked to Jisung, and he’d agreed to speak with Chi-won.

“Chi-won, can you come here for a minute?” you called out.

He walked into the living room, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. He looked at your phone, jaw dropping when he saw Jisung on the screen. You held it out and said, “My brother wants to talk to you.”

He took the phone, sending a glance your way before looking back at Jisung. You moved to the kitchen to make breakfast, giving the boys some privacy. You could hear Jisung’s laugh through the tiny speaker, and it made your heart ache. Not seeing him every day felt like torture. You were so used to talk to him every day, but the both of you were too busy with your jobs, not to mention that you were still unsure of what the others knew about you and Jaemin.

As you were making some fried eggs, Chi-won joined you, holding your phone out with Jisung still on the screen. The hockey player sent a look that told you there would be a conversation later, and then he disappeared to his room. You looked at Jisung and smiled, asking him how it went. He said it went well, that Chi-won seemed to really listen to what he’d had to say. A door had opened behind him, and Chenle walked into the room. His face lit up when he saw you, and he ran over and jumped on Jisung’s back.

“Y/N! I haven’t talked to you in so long,” he said, suddenly pouting.

“I know, I’m sorry. Prospect camp was crazy, and I’ve been busy with teaching Chi-won English,” you replied. “I wish you guys were here. You’d love it.”

“We’ll have to visit sometime. Jisung, we gotta head to bed. We have practice tomorrow morning,” he said.

“Sleep well, you two,” you said with a smile.

“Love you!” they shouted, and then the call ended.

You finished breakfast and called for Chi-won. He joined you in the kitchen, taking his plate from you without a word. The two of you sat at the breakfast bar, eating in silence. Tyler and Cat were in Canada for a wedding, so you were alone with him. You waited for him to say something, anything, but he didn’t. Instead, he washed the dishes and went back to his room. He returned a few minutes later in workout clothes, so you changed into your own outfit and silently followed him to the gym downstairs. He started out on the bike while you went to the treadmill, starting a light jog.

After a few minutes, Chi-won said, “So, your brother is Park Jisung.”

“Yup. Has been for ten years,” you panted.

“I didn’t even know he had a sister.”

“No one does. It’s too dangerous.”

“That must suck. I can’t imagine keeping my sister a secret,” he said.

“Seeing him live his dream makes it all worth it. Besides, once I’m living here permanently, we’ll be able to tell everyone who I am.”

///

Getting out of bed was harder and harder as each day passed. You could feel yourself settle into a deep and heavy depression. and it seemed like the people you were living with were concerned. You never felt hungry, you were having trouble finding the motivation to shower, and you were ignoring every call that popped up on your phone.

There was a knock on your door before Cat poked her head in. You glanced at her before turning your attention back to the window. She sat in the armchair and leaned on her elbows, sending a smile your way.

“So, Chi-won and Tyler talked to the team, and they decided that if you want, you can go back to Korea until it’s time for training camp,” she told you.

You sat up slowly and asked, “What?”

“We can all tell how homesick you are, and Chi-won said that you had an argument with someone that sounded like your boyfriend. They have a back-up translator, so you can go home for a little bit,” she explained.

“He told you all that?”

“Well, he used an app to translate, but yes.”

Leaping out of bed, you hugged her tightly, mentally thanking yourself for having showered that morning. She laughed and hugged you back before telling you to start packing. You started throwing your things into suitcases and your duffel bag as she left, and tears started streaming down your face in happiness.

You hugged Tyler and Chi-won in thanks before rushing to the airport, not wanting to stay in America any more than you had to. You called your parents and Jisung once you had a ticket purchased, and they promised to keep it a secret. Jisung was practically vibrating in his seat once he heard the news, and you couldn’t wait to hug your family again.

Somehow, you managed to sleep on the flight. When you landed, it was about three in the afternoon. You raced towards your family as soon as you spotted them, leaping into Jisung’s arms. He lifted you up and squeezed tight, as if you would disappear if he let go. You then hugged your parents, not afraid to let the tears fall down your cheeks.

“I missed you guys so much,” you sobbed.

“We missed you too, sweetheart,” you dad said.

When you were home, you took a couple hours to settle in before taking Jisung with you to the dorms. Not only did you have some boys to surprise, but there was a certain boy with blue bangs you needed to speak to. Jisung seemed to be excited to be on the other end of the surprise.

As you walked into the building, your stomach twisted into a giant knot. You didn’t know how Jaemin was going to react. Before you could dwell on it too much, Jisung opened the door to the Dream dorm. Jeno and Haechan were playing video games in the living area, but they stopped immediately when they looked at you.

“Sunshine!” Jeno shouted. He threw the controller on the couch and ran over, scooping you into a bear hug.

“What are you doing here?” Haechan asked as you managed to pry away from Jeno to hug him.

“They let me come back home until training camp starts,” you explained. “Where are the others?”

“They’re in their rooms. Jaemin’s napping, but Renjun and Chenle are playing PUBG,” Jeno explained. “It’s good to have you back. Jaemin’s been moping every since you left.”

So they didn’t know. “I’ll go see Renjun and Chenle first. Jaemin must be really tired if he’s napping.”

You walked down the hallway and quietly stepped into Renjun and Chenle’s room. They were too busy looking at their phones to notice, so you sat by Renjun and asked how he was doing. He glanced at you and then did a double take before tackling you to the bed. Chenle complained, but when he looked up a screech left his mouth instead as he piled on top. They started asking you a bunch of questions at once, but you shushed them and explained why you were home. Chenle didn’t want to let go, but you explained that Jaemin didn’t know yet.

Jaemin looked so peaceful as he slept. You could just stand there and watch until he woke up, but the conversation needed to be had sooner than later. Quietly closing the door, you walked over and sat on the bed as gentle as possible. Your fingers carded through his hair, pushing it away from his forehead. He sighed in his sleep, melting under your touch. You called out his name lightly, but he didn’t stir. You tried a couple more times, and his eyes finally opened. He stared at you for about ten seconds before grabbing you. You were suddenly thrown on the bed, and he pinned your arms down before kissing you.

Kissing Jaemin felt like a dream, especially after what you two’d been going through the past few weeks. He pressed kiss after kiss to your lips, finally pulling away with a frown.

"I’m really sorry for how I acted the past couple times we talked. I trust you, and I support your career,” he said.

“I forgive you. God, I forgive you. I’ve been so miserable the past few weeks. I should’ve tried harder to tell you sooner than when I had.”

“Let’s just forget this, okay?”

“Deal.”

He leaned down to press your lips together again, not leaving any space between your bodies. He trailed kisses down your neck, sucking a mark into your skin at the base of your throat. When he moved back to your face, he whispered, “I love you.”

That was the first time either of you had ever said those words. Whenever the two of you were together, there was a good chance another Dreamie was with you, so actual dates were rare, which meant that neither of you felt like it was the right time to say them. However, the past three weeks, had proven that it didn’t matter how much time was spent alone.

“I love you too.”

It was about half an hour before you two emerged from the room. The others made fun of the hickeys that were all over your necks, but in that moment you didn’t care. You and Jaemin were more than okay, and that was all that mattered to you.

95 notes · View notes

roswelldetails · 4 years

Text

RNM 2x05 - I'll Stand By You

So just a little note from me, the person behind the season 2 detailing. I am trying really really hard to keep emotion out of these posts...which is really really hard for me because I'm an inherently emotional person. I'm a glass case of emotion, ready to shatter at any given moment. (#dramatic) But I want to be true to the intent of this blog and keep my feelings, biases, and, you know, shipping out of this blog.

It was really really hard to do with this episode. Because I straight up ugly cried for like, 45 of the 60 minutes. 😂

So I guess, the point is, I'm proud of myself and sticking to the details here. My regular blog is where I'm doing the emotional flip out thing! 😂

EPISODE SUMMARY:

ACCEPTING REALITY — The discovery of some complications with Max’s (Nathan Dean) pod forces Liz (Jeanine Mason), Michael (Michael Vlamis) and Isobel (Lily Cowles) to confront the possibility that they may not be able to save him. Elsewhere, Maria (Heather Hemmens) and Alex (Tyler Blackburn) make amends. Kimberly McCullough directed the episode written by Alanna Bennett & Jason Gavin (#205). Original airdate 4/13/2020.

DETAILS:

Max/Isobel/Michael reunite at age 11 according to what Michael tells Alex in 1x10. So that would make the opening of this episode set in 2002ish.

Michael tells Max and Isobel, "I remember you. I don't know you."

"After nobody adopted me for a year they just stuck me with the name of that trucker who found us."

"I didn't ask you for anything."

This is like the thesis statement of Michael's whole history with Max in the flashbacks.

"Don't pay more than you collect, kid. Passing credit back and forth is a good way to get stuck with somebody forever."

Rosa's art.

What I can see says: "...what they all told me, but I didn't listen" and "Stand the shelter".

Rosa on her dreams

"I have not had any freaky dreams in weeks. Okay, Max is probably off haunting Isobel now that they're strong enough for their psychic twincest weirdness."

"How long has that been happening?"

"Um, I don't know. It's an old boom box."

"Rosa, have electrical appliances been malfunctioning around you?"

"I really thought it was just a side effect of the handprint."

"If being in the pod introduced a new protein into your system it could have altered your DNA too. You could be developing abilities."

"Liz, look. The handprint is changing. It's smaller."

"It's fading."

"Tell me this is a good thing."

"I don't think so."

Michael and Liz theorizing on why the pod shorted out:

"The pod's got a charge. It's like a battery powering the preservation process. This one's gone dead."

"Did the generator blow the electromagnetic threshold?"

"I think a surge came from the pod itself. But that pod has lasted almost a century. It shouldn't glitch out."

"Okay, well, then, this one did."

"All right, stop. It doesn't matter why the pod is broken. It just is. So how long does Max have?"

"My theory is that being tethered to Rosa through the mark is what kept Max from going brain-dead, and in turn the stasis process is what kept the mark from fading. So he could be gone by tonight."

"Okay, well, we have three more pods. So let's just put him into another pod."

"No. He's just gonna do it again. I haven't told you everything. I didn't want to scare you. I didn't want to be the one that took the hope away."

"Talk now, Rosa. Right now."

"I was seeing Max in my nightmares months before I told you about it, and he was begging me to stop you. He said that he was in a lot of pain in there."

"That's Noah's pod. Noah told us it was broken. It wasn't keeping him in stasis. He could feel time passing. None of us thought of that."

"We've been doing everything we can to make Max stronger. He pulled his own plug."

Note...as far as we know Isobel was the only one who knew about Noah's pod being broken. In 1x12 it was before Liz arrived at the house that he told them about the broken pod, so only Max and Isobel heard that part of the story.

Alex on his training. "NSA intelligence cryptology training".

Monitor screen in the secret lab:

Noah's heart is still too weak to transplant. Kyle says it needs at least eight more weeks

"I wrote a paper for a bioethics class on patients in vegetative states who feel pain. Sometimes it's all they feel."

As a non sciencey person, I was wondering if bioethics class was a real thing. Tonight I saw an interview on the news with a UC Berkeley bioethics professor on COVID. So yes, it's a thing.

Alex on Michael that summer post-Rosa's death:

Starting fights with jocks

Broke into the drugstore

Not going to UNM

Hasn't hung out with Max all summer

Got busted for stealing hubcaps (Kyle's hubcaps, we learn later)

Became a walking bar fight

Was in jail when Alex left to enlist

Michael on Max in 2008:

"It's more than that. And it's less than that. We were friends when we were kids, but now Max reminds me of a bunch of stuff that I'd rather forget. The only thing that we have in common anymore is Isobel."

Max's yearbook had a pencil stuck in the page with Liz and Max's photo in it. (The one we first saw in 1x03).

"Biology Club. Max hated science. He was in that club for four years just to watch your sister chew on the end of her pencil."

Max's mindscape:

First just desert, clouds, and then lightning strikes (destructive energy?)

Liz's antennae -- they disappear from Isobel's hands

Rosa describes it as broken

Crashdown special is Max's favorite "Little Green Man milkshake".

The Crashdown counter is kind of merged with biology lab equipment.

The juke box is there

The Crashdown booths

Jeep

Neon Crashdown sign

One of those claw drop game machines (from the Crashdown) but it's filled with baked good displays.

The yearbook

Later, everything else is gone except the one Crashdown booth, the Jeep, and the neon sign.

The distorted music they follow to find Max is the Cactus Groove song in the music list...just, messed around with. See @angsty-nerd's post here:

"I'm the hothead. You are the hero. It's always been that way."

"You stole the hubcaps off Kyle Valenti's graduation present. Both his parents are cops. Do you want to end up in jail tonight?".

👀 Tonight, specifically.

Michael seemed excited about the job at Foster's Ranch until he found out that Max set it up for him. Max found out about it from his dad (only like the 2nd or 3rd mention of his dad in the series so far).

"When I got back in town I asked Max why you and your brilliant mind hadn't changed the world yet. He said you didn't care about the world enough to bother changing it. He believed you could."

Max and Isobel in the mindscape:

"You're okay. I could feel something was wrong with you. Everything felt…"

"Cold. I know."

"You can't be here. It's finally ending. I can feel it. But I don't know what happens if you're in my head when I die."

"So it's true? You want this?"

"I could feel my connection to the outside world getting stronger, so I snapped. I couldn't take it anymore. I released a surge. You have to let me go, Iz."

"I can't take it anymore."

"Okay."

"I am so sorry."

"I just want to memorize this."

"Okay. Okay. I need you to tell Liz something."

"You can tell her yourself. She and Kyle are prepping for surgery. They're going to use the faulty heart. She just wants to talk to you before you die."

"No. No."

"You won't be suffering. They're just gonna bring you back and then let you go."

"No you have to stop this. You cannot bring me back under any circumstances."

"Max? What is really going on?"

"I am dangerous. Whatever Liz is bringing back is not me. It's just some broken shell."

Maria on her mom's computer

"Her nurse said that for the two weeks before she went missing, when she wasn't trying to escape, she was talking to someone online."

The 21st birthday flashback

Isobel gets Michael to help move Max after getting drunk on tequila. He passed out in front of the tattoo parlor. It's the same tattoo parlor Michael goes to at the end of the episode.

Max's weird drunken statement.

"The thing is, there has to be there. Okay? There's always three. Until the very end. I'll show you...What it means is you should be here…'cause it's all broken without three. So we'll figure it out. You'll find your way back."

👀 Until the very end. Interesting.

On Max becoming a deputy:

"You know he did the whole police academy thing because of you, right? He thinks you're gonna get into the kind of trouble you can't get out of if you don't know someone."

Back in the mindscape:

"I figured it all out. She, there's an energy to suffering, there's an energy to death, and when I heal people, I absorb that energy. So when I resurrected Rosa, I took in ten years of emptiness. So if you resurrect me, you will be bringing back an infection. Don't want… I don't want to come back as a monster. I don't want to hurt anyone that I care about."

"That's what this is about? We've been hurting, Max. We don't work without you."

"You will! You will. You are stronger now than when I died. All of you are. You, Michael, Liz, you will survive this. The three of you. No, you need to stop them, Iz. Now."

"Okay. I love you."

"You too." Isobel disappears.

Max is using pretty similar wording to his drunken rambles in the 21st birthday flashback

We don't see that Max is chained down until this next exchange with Rosa. Isobel didn't see that detail as far as we know. Didn't hear the chains clanking when they stood and hugged. Only after Isobel left.

"I'm sorry this is happening."

"Isobel is lying. She is buying time. You know she'll never let me go. But you can feel the darkness too, right? That's why you don't like being in my head. Because you know it's real."

"I didn't want that to be true, but yes."

"I know my sister and I know your sister and they'll never give up. So you have to be the one to stop this surgery, okay? Or I will destroy everything that we love. You have to stop them to save them. Now go. Please, Rosa. Go."

Isobel explaining to Liz

"When he saved Rosa he absorbed all of that dark energy. He's gonna have to expel it."

"And he's afraid he's gonna kill someone when he does."

"Yeah. So we just need someone stronger than Max to take that hit...if he thinks he needs to protect us he obviously doesn't know how capable we are. Bring him back, Liz. I'll handle the rest."

"I get it now. It's gotta be the three of us."

"He would never pull his plug to end his own suffering. Unless he thought he was saving us from something. And I'm a little sick of his heroic martyr crap."

In case you missed it, Michael did not know that. At the beginning of the hospital sequence Isobel is telling Liz what she learned in Max's mindscape and says that she hasn't been able to get ahold of Michael. Michael figured it out on his own. He finally "got it".

The pacemaker:

Isobel with Max at the end… everything is gone except the Jeep. And Bright Eyes playing (the song he and Liz danced to on their first date back in 2008). And then his eyes close and Bright Eyes fades away.

“First thing I remember is the three of us. We woke up terrified and lost. But together. And then all of the sudden I was alone. I got real good at being alone. I had given up on people entirely. And then you found me again. Hell of hero move. You showed up just in time. When you are a kid who nobody loves, kindness is a currency. Friendship doesn’t means jack. Family just lies, and hurts, and leaves. I’ve only ever known love to be temporary. So yeah, I push people away. Every time someone threatens to care about me I test their love until they have to leave. Connection is conditional. Everybody eventually gives up on the guy who refuses to be rescued. But you were the only one who I couldn’t run off. You never believed me when I tried to be something I wasn’t. So this thing in your chest, it might give your heart a pretty solid kick every once in a while. Consider it payback. It’s my hero move, Max. If you wake up, you consider us even, okay? If you wake up, we can be a family.”

Good visual parallels during Michael's speech. Alex and Kyle drinking together during the "and then you found me again". Maria walking up on "the guy who refuses to be rescued"

Max is in the coma for three weeks. Wakes up at the secret lab (instead of his house, which is where he was previously. I'm guessing it was a planned wake up because he's no longer plugged into all of the IVs and whatnot.

"I begged you to understand."

"Max, it's gonna be fine."

"No… I told you to let me go. I can feel it inside me."

"It's...it's symmetry, okay? It's just energy for energy. We can deal with that. Fight it, Max. This isn't you."

"I don't want to hurt you. I need to get out. I need to get away from you, from everyone."

"I can't let you do that."

Max shoves Isobel and runs. When he shoves her there's a slight ringing like the sound they use when the aliens use their powers. Isobel follows and stops him with her powers.

"I made a promise that if you came back and you weren't Max, and you were actually going to hurt people that I would kill you. I figure, hey, you got to play God. Make life and death decisions all on your own. Well it's my turn now."

MUSIC:

1. Letters To Cleo "Here and Now"

2. Lady Antebellum "Love Don't Live Here"

3. Cactus Groove "Fallin"

4. James Talley "Big Thunder"

8. Ross Copperman "Stars Are On Your Side"

5. Lindsey Ray "Keep You Safe"

6. Tommee Profitt feat. Sam Tinnesz "With you Til The End"

7. Bright Eyes "First Day Of My Life"

The Cactus Groove song is the first song this season that I haven’t been able to find on Spotify… let me know if any of y’all had any luck with it!

#roswell new mexico #rnm season 2 #episode details #long post #rnm 205 #i'll stand by you

32 notes · View notes

imaconstantmess · 4 years

Text

Until. Part 2/?

Part 2, criticism still needed and welcome, wanted to say thank you to everyone who reblogged/ noted because you gave me the confidence boost to write a part 2 ❤️

Is this too long? Please let me know

part 1 here

Steve x gender neutral! Reader

Steve’s mind has been occupied for the past few weeks, and it’s got something to do with the recruit he’s been assigned to train.

Warnings: swearing

The ride home on the back of Steve’s bike was loud. You could feel the wind nipping at your skin and the engine roaring underneath you, and it was brilliant. You smiled wide as the blur of New York lights went past you, and almost felt like letting out a ridiculously loud laugh until you remembered who you were riding with. You thought it best not to embarrass yourself infront of your captain. As Steve got closer to his home, the sound of traffic grew quieter. The city never does really sleep.

He pulled up behind a large, fairly average looking apartment building and started to turn the keys to his bike. You let go of his waist and hopped off the bike before it got awkward, and started to fiddle with the strap of your- his- helmet. Steve looked at you with a slight smirk while he watched you struggle. He was about to do it for you when you found the little side clip preventing you from taking it off. You let out a little victory sound as Steve raised an eyebrow at you.

“What? It’s not like it was obvious” you smiled at him. The bike ride made you feel better than you should have felt, considering what had happened, however you found it hard to be upset in the prolonged presence of the dear old captain.

“Hey, I didn’t say anything.” He laughed with mock offence. You two made small talk while walking to the elavator, Steve letting you in first. He pressed the button and stood back, turning to you. “You can stay with me for as long as you need, you know. I wasn’t fond of Starks curfews either”

“Thank you, Steve. Really, you’ve got no idea how much I appreciate you doing this for me.” You sent him a warm, but tired smile which he returned. The lack of sleep was brought back to your attention with the yawn you had to stifle. You both got out of the elevator, and let Steve lead you to his apartment. You were both being quiet, considering your neighbours, as as you entered the apartment you took in how nice it was. It was modern, but still homey. Part of you expected it to be at least a little out-dated, but we’re pleasantly surprised.

“Nice place you got. Was almost expecting it to look like my grandmas living room” you joked. Steve cracked a smile and tried not to laugh. He loved it when you made backhanded compliments like that, it helped him find humour and a bit of normality in his strange situation. It also kept him sharp.

“If the pottery she keeps sending you is any indication, that woman’s got style” he hung his jacket up and motioned for you to do the same.

“She takes commissions you know. I’ll tell her to give you the friends and family discount” you sent him a mischievous smile as you both walked towards his kitchen. The warm neutral tones his lamps created made you feel sleepy, but for some reason you wanted to be awake.

“I’ll keep that in mind if I need a fruit bowl. Or a key bowl. Or a-“

“OK I get it, my grandma likes making me things.” You finished with a laugh. Steve smiled too, and you saw his eyes crinkle. But those crinkled eyes looked tired, which reminded you why you were here. You pulled out your phone from your back pocket to glance at the time. 3:47am. You hadn’t even realised.

Steve noticed something different when you pulled out your phone. He’d noticed the texts Tyler had sent you, and a few missed calls. He didn’t see what he wrote, he just saw the heart emoji still next to his name. He’d seen it pop up while you were training before. It also reminded him why you were here and not getting the rest you deserve. With that thought, he turned to go towards his room, leaving you a little bit confused on what to do.

“Wait here a sec, I’ll get you something to sleep in. There’s a washer- dryer- combo thing that stark gave me in the utility room “ he scrunched his eyebrows a little when trying to explain it “you can wash your clothes for in the morning” as he left, you took more time to admire the apartment. Warm tones and wooden furniture, with navy blue accents here and there. It was very... Steve. You couldn’t see any pictures on the walls, but the apartment felt lived in. There were a few books placed neatly here and there, and you smiled when you saw the record player in the corner. And then at the other side of the room, a stereo, which screamed ‘STARK’. Behind the stereo you saw lots of CDs, and wondered what kind of modern music Steve was into. You were friends enough to know that Bucky was Steve’s best friend, and friends enough to know that Steve trusted you with the embarrassing tales of his childhood and early 20s that you couldn’t find in the history books. He sometimes talked of his mother, Sarah when he was in a good mood, saying he wished she could see the world today. You told him about your current life, about what shows you were obsessed with, about times when you were not the witty shield agent he usually saw, but just a regular dumbass going about their day to day life. He’d scolded you for calling yourself that, but after tripping over your shoes and going nose first into your door that morning, you begged to differ. It’s not like you hid your past from him, but the subject never really came up. It was a pretty normal childhood in your opinion, although you rarely saw your dad as he worked abroad a lot. Your mother was a stressful person, but she could also be the most understanding mother in the world. You went to a normal school and had normal friends, and there wasn’t really much else too it. But for some reason, the idea of bringing justice to the world had stuck with you since you were a kid. Funnily enough, you’d wanted to be a superhero. You never thought you’d end up actually working with one.

“I don’t really have anything smaller, but I think these should fit?” He handed you a pair of grey gym shorts and a light grey t-shirt. They were too big for you, but with the mans super soldier size it was understandable.

“I’m just surprised you own a pair of shorts” Steve rolled his eyes “it’s like you live for joggers and jeans”

“I mean if you don’t want them-“

“No no, these are fine. Thank you.” Steve smiled, he knew he’d won. Your relationship with him was built on free flowing jokes, sarcasm rooted deeply within you both. Steve was usually just a bit more reserved, keeping his comments to himself. He felt comfortable enough not hold back infront of you.

“Good news though” Steve said with an easy grin.

“And what would that be?” You really hoped he wasn’t being sarcastic.

“I’m giving you- well us- the day off tomorrow. There’s no way in hell I’m training recruits when I’m this tired.” He ran a hand through his hair and rested his hand on his neck as he let out a small sigh.

“Does somebody get cranky?” You laughed at him while he rolled his eyes. “Because honestly, I’d be cranky too. Hope you don’t mind, but I’m not setting an alarm”

“Trust me, I’m not either. Been dying to get a decent nights rest for a while now. Your rooms just down the hall, want a cup of coffee or anything?” You couldn’t read the look on his face, putting it down to you just being tired after over 24 hours of being awake. Steve was hoping you’d stay up for a while longer. He knew it was selfish, but talking to you, with no distractions or interruptions was addictive. He’d been savouring every moment he could get with you, never crossing the platonic line you had created. He wouldn’t make a move on you, but by god did he wish he could. At first glance, he knew you were attractive. Not just in your looks, but the way you held yourself and the personality that seemed to shine through when you spoke. You were reserved, yet confident in whatever short sentences you had to say. And that was just the beginning. The reason Steve had been losing sleep was because of you. He’d be worried when you came to training irritated or angry, but not unloading your problems or talking to anyone- to him - about them. He kept himself up at night, debating whether or not his feelings had begun to border romantic or of it was just a crush that would go away. He never dared think of you in a sexual way, feeling as if it was a boundary, that if crossed would change his behaviour towards you. Change his behaviour enough to push you away, when all he wanted to do was hold you tight and tell you everything was going to be alright. But it wasn’t his place. Before, that was Tyler’s job. He was the one who was supposed to comfort you, because he was the one you chose to give your world to. And he took it and he threw it away, and he hurt you. And Steve was willing to bet he hurt you more than you’d let on and he was angry. You didn’t deserve heartache at all, and seeing you with tears in your eyes, in such a vulnerable place made his heart hurt too. Before he could think about it any longer, you spoke.

“Nah I’m alright. I think I’d better head to bed. Not everyone has super-soldier-stamina like you” you held the clothes Steve had given you a little closer to your chest. He gave you an understanding smile, and gestured you to go down the hall.

“There should be a couple of spare toothbrushes in the cabinet. Take your pick.” Steve stepped back a little as he gestured, not realising how close you were. You made your way to walk past him, peeking down the hall.

“Goodnight Steve” you placed your hand on his arm “and thank you. For- well for everything” Steve’s heart swelled at the contact.

“You’re welcome y/n. Go get a good nights rest. I’ll be here in the morning.” With one last smile you made your way to the room at the end of the hall, while Steve entered his own. The room had a standard double in the middle, a set of drawers and 2 night stands on either side of the bed. You found the lamp that was on the drawers, and as you turned it on you could see the room clearly. The walls were white, but the carpet was a nice, dark grey. The curtains that outlined the window looked more for decoration, a simple line pattern going across brought a little colour into the room with different shades of blue. There was a grey black out blind, which you were grateful for, and not much else. The furniture was wooden. Painted white. The lamps and the bedding were a simple blue, which matched the curtains well. You could tell it was a guest bedroom. It wasn’t lived in at all. To your left you saw a door, which you assumed would be the en suite. As you thought of a shower, you remembered how gross you must look and decided the first thing you were going to do was shower. The bathroom was nice, but small. It had a decent mirror, and as you looked at it you wondered if Steve noticed the bit of ketchup on your face from earlier. You found a toothbrush in the cabinet, and what looked to be toothpaste. You set them aside as you turned the water on. As you got in the hot shower, your muscles relaxed and you were left alone with your thoughts. Which, as you would find out, was a bad idea. You thought of Tyler, and the life you had made together just suddenly gone. You remembered how you’d both laughed and cried at the same movies, and how many times you’d had dinner with your mother. All of it just... gone. A flood of emotions went through you as your face felt hot and your eyed stung.

“Don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry...”you whispered as you felt the tears escape “...fuck” you were in the shower a few minutes longer than you would have been, having cried out all the pent up emotion. You got out and dried your hair with a towel, and changed into Steve’s clothes. You felt a strange sense of calm, when you put them on. The smell of Steve was usually clean, like fresh linen, and something just distinctly... him. You crawled into bed after turning the light off, and let sleep consume you.

——————————————————-

When you woke up, you felt a whole lot lighter. You checked your phone, which was on 17%, and the time read 10:30. You didn’t sleep for as long as you would have liked, but your stomach rumbled and compelled you to get up and have breakfast. You washed your face with cold water to wake you up a little and headed towards the kitchen.

——————————————————

It was 7 am when Sam and Bucky met up for their usual daily run. The sun was starting to come out and they were ready to go, except they were missing someone.

“You heard from Steve? He’s usually on my ass about being late” sam said as he was doing a little stretching before the run.

“Was about to ask you the same thing. He did leave late last night after your trainee decided to try play a power move. Could hear Fury giving the speech to the trainees about how you must ‘treat each mentor how you would treat your own’” Bucky replied, doing a half-assed impression of the Director. Sam let out a chuckle.

“Old mans probably catching up on his beauty sleep. I’ll go over after we’re done. Coming with?” Sam finished his stretching and limbered up a little.

“Sure thing.” Bucky was a little concerned about Steve. Usually he’d call or text if he couldn’t come on a run, but he had been tired lately.

They both settled in to a comfortable pace, Bucky going slower than usual to keep Sam company. It was around 9:45 when they’d finished. Sam was sweaty, but used a towel to dry off and after some deodorant, put on a new shirt.

“You always keep a change of clothes in your car?” Bucky asked, only half sarcastic.

“With the situations y’all put me in, it’s nice to be prepared” Sam’s tone was light, showing that he was joking. Bucky was getting used to the dry humour Sam had, and although he’d never admit it he usually found him quite funny.

They got in the car and after about 5 minutes of having a drink and catching their breath, they started making their way to Steves apartment.

———————————————-

Steve had woken up just before 10. He had a quick shower before exiting his room, now in some comfy jeans and a T-shirt he found in his wardrobe. He wasn’t really planning on going anywhere today, but he was going to ask what you wanted to do. He was about to look in the fridge before he heard a knocking at his door. He went to answer it, as it was getting louder and louder by the minute. He already knew who it was. He opened the door with a blank expression as Bucky and Sam strolled into the apartment.

“Where were you man? Didn’t feel like leaving me in the dust today?” Sam asked as he looked in the fridge, frowning once he saw it was empty. “You got anything to eat? I’m starving.” And as if on cue his stomach rumbles.

“Please say you do, he’s been complaining all the way here” Bucky added with a smirk. Sam was about to retort when Steve spoke.

“Could you guys keep it down a little?” And from the looks on their faces he knew he just said the wrong thing.

Sam spoke up first, putting 2 + 2 together.

“Why? Who else is here?” He said much quieter, but Steve heard it. He knew he wasn’t going to hear the end of this.

“Wait, you actually brought someone over?” Bucky couldn’t believe it. Steve finally had the guts to pick up a date. The faint sound of water running confirmed their theories.

“Are they hot?” Sam asked with anticipation on his face.

“Are they nice?” Bucky asked, a bit more protective of his friend. Steve had little luck/ experience in the dating department and he didn’t want his friend hurt. Before Steve could answer, the door to the spare room opened. They heard footsteps coming down the hall and waited for who it could possibly be.

—————————————————

You stepped out of the hall into the kitchen, phone in your pocket as you were debating to go knock on Steve’s bedroom door. You jumped as you saw 3 men in the kitchen, but calming down when you recognised the familiar faces.

“Morning” you greeted them with a tired smile. Bucky and Sam just stared at you. “What’s up?” You asked with caution. They didn’t seem to blink.

“...is this what it looks like?” Sam asked, gesturing to your attire. Tired from just waking up, you didn’t get the meaning behind his words.

“Is what what it looks like?” You asked as you his a yawn.

“Did you two...?” Bucky made a more obvious gesture between you and Steve. You glanced down, momentarily forgetting what you were wearing. You supposed it did look a bit suspicious.

“Oh! Uh, no. We didn’t- we didn’t do anything like that.” You had blushed a little, the situation being a little more than embarrassing. Steve spoke up then, saving you from the questions that were bound to be fired at you.

“Y/n needed a place to stay last night. It was a little last minute, so I let y/n borrow some clothes” Steve didn’t want to tell them what happened, he didn’t feel as if it was his place. Bucky saw the worried look on Steves face and decided to speak.

“What happened?” He asked softly “how come you didn’t go home?” You and Bucky were friends. You weren’t as close to him as you were to Steve, but you two talked often enough around the compound to consider each other friends.

Steve looked at you then, worried about of you actually wanted to tell them. You caught his look and gave him a small smile that seemed to say ‘it’s ok’.

“Well, long story short, I did go home, but me and Tyler had a bad fight. I couldn’t stay there, and Steve found me and offered me a place to sleep.” Bucky looked a lot more understanding to the situation while Sam looked angry.

“What an asshole.” Sam muttered under his breath. You let out a little laugh at that and it lightened the mood.

“You and him still together?” Bucky asked, still speaking softly. He met Tyler once, you two passed him on the street and you stopped to say hi. Tyler didn’t look interested in what you were saying at all, and Bucky had caught him staring at a woman walking past. He didn’t say anything to you then, not wanting to cause an argument when you looked happy. He’d told Steve of course, and Steve nearly knocked another punching bag off it’s hook.

“No, we aren’t. And Im not planning on being with him again. Ever.” You said with a bit of anger in your voice. You figured it wouldn’t hurt to tell them what caused you to leave. “He tried to get physical. Threw something at my head. Not putting up with that bullshit... so I wandered around for a while and found Steve. That’s it.” You looked directly at Sam as you finished your little speech, feeling as if he would have something to add. He kept quiet at your look. Everyone seemed to almost look down, unsure what to say. You decided to lighten the mood. “Is there anything for breakfast? I’m starving.”

“No, there isn’t, because SOMEBODY doesn’t want to keep his fridge full.” Sam gave a pointed look at Steve, and Steve seemed a little offended.

“I’ve been busy! And you two eat most of the food I buy.” Bringing Bucky back into the conversation. Sam and Steve carried on with the friendly banter and you were laughing at them along with Bucky.

“You’re both like an old married couple” you said to them both, which made Steve shut up and Sam act mock offended.

“Old? You’re calling me OLD? I have never in my LIFE been more insulted. I thought we were friends y/n” you couldn’t keep a straight face as you both burst in to laughter. Steve was happy. You were here, you were laughing with his friends. He could get used to it.

“How about we go out for breakfast? It’s not even 11 yet” Bucky suggested , looking at his watch. Steve remembered your attire, and thought it’s probably best you didn’t go out like that- you’d be uncomfortable being in a busy place in your pjs. Before he could step in for you, you answered.

“As much as I’d love that, I don’t have any clothes. I forgot to wash mine yester- well, this morning “ Sam had a thoughtful look on his face.

“Do you have the key to your apartment?”

“Yeah, why?” You didn’t know where this was going.

“I can go pick up some stuff if you’d like.” Sam asked you, and Steve cursed himself for not offering to do that sooner.

“I’ll go too. Help carry some things” Bucky was being a gentleman, but he was really going to make sure none of your things had been broken. People do weird things when they’re angry. And also, to stop Sam from ‘throwing hands’ as the spider boy called it. It would give you and Steve some time to talk at least.

“Really? You two are life savers.” You looked at everyone.”I’ll go find my keys” you turned around and headed for your room. You came back, gave them the keys and they were off. You turned to Steve with a smile, he’d been quiet.

“You ok? If you’re still tired you should get some rest” your brows creased a little bit in concern. You didn’t know if he got much sleep.

“I’m fine n/n, I’m more worried about how YOU’RE doing” he mirrored your concerned stance. He’d never called you n/n before, it was nice. You told him that you were fine, that you were better than you thought you’d be. He listened to your every word, making you feel as if what you had to say was actually important. It was nice having someone listen to your problems for a change. Sam and Bucky called, they didn’t actually know where your apartment was. They FaceTimed using Steve’s phone, pointing out which things were yours. You and Steve were on the couch at this point, sat quite close so you both could be on camera. Neither of you mentioned it, but you weren’t complaining. After getting some things like your laptop, phone charger, a rucksack full of clothes and your safe box from under the bed (you kept your gun and money in it, easier to grab in difficult situations. Every trainee had one) they were on their way back. Bucky accidentally turned the camera around, and was walking around with it pointed to the floor. As he stepped around the broken pottery from last night, Steve saw how many broken pieces there were. He knew it was thrown hard.

“Bucky, we can’t see you” you said to him. Bucky pointed the phone at his face but the camera was still turned around. There was a hole in the wall, and it looked big. Steve almost went white, that could have been your skull. He kept quiet as Bucky turned the camera around.

“We’ve got most of your stuff, but I think you might have to come find the rest” he said as he gave a quick glance round.

“Yeah that’s fine. Don’t forget to lock up, see you two later”

“Later”

Bucky ended the call and left you and Steve alone on the couch. He looked at you and asked if you were alright. His arm was along the top of the sofa, behind your back. You leaned back into his arm and let out a sigh. This was the most intimate position you two had ever been in outside of training, but it felt natural. Nice, even. You told him how you would be a lot better after you had food, and laughed it off.

You’d never had support like this before. You’d never had friends who were willing to take you in without even being asked, to drop everything. That was until you met the avengers. Until you met him.

Until you met Steve Rogers.

———————————————————-

A/n: am I making these too long? Or rambling? Idk I’ve never written before so sorry if it’s not great 🥺

#steve rogers x y/n #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x you #steve rogers #marvel #captain america #bucky barnes #sam wilson

11 notes · View notes

dailyaudiobible · 3 years

Text

07/10/21 DAB Transcript

1 Chronicles 9:1-10:14, Acts 27:21-44, Psalm 8:1-9, Proverbs 18:23-24

Today is the 10th day of July, welcome to the Daily Audio Bible, I am Brian it is wonderful to be here with you today as we round the corner on another one of our weeks. And yeah, we’ll read today and then we’ll release, will be done with this week and continue moving forward. We’ve been reading from the English Standard Version this week, which is what will do today. We've been working our way through the Book of 1 Chronicles, as well as the Book of Acts which is what we’ll continue to do today. And so, 1 Chronicles chapters 9 and 10.

Prayer:

Father, we thank You for Your word. Here we are we've successfully reached the conclusion of another full week together. It's a day-by-day occurrence in the weeks go by and Your faithfulness is ever apparent. We look back to yesterday and You were there. We look back to last week and You were there. We look back to last month and You've been there all the way we look through our lives and see how the guidance of the Scriptures that You have always been at work and will always continue to Father us and to love us and we love You, we adore You, we worship You. There is none like You and even saying that is ridiculous. There is none even close. The only thing that is close is that Your Spirit is within us and You are empowering us to bring good news and light into this world and so often we squelch that. So, Holy Spirit come, thank You for Your patience and kindness toward us. We pray this in the name of Jesus. Amen.

Announcements:

dailyaudiobible.com is home base, it is where we find out what's going on around here and you can get there by using the well, the web dailyaudiobible.com or using the Daily Audio Bible app which also gives access to all of the pertinent things that are that are there like the Daily Audio Bible Shop that has resources that we have crafted and created over the years specifically for this Community and specifically for the journey that we are on together as we take the journey of a lifetime through the Scriptures. So, check out the Daily Audio Bible Shop whether you’re looking for written resources, books to take the journey deeper and further or just fun stuff for our Daily Audio Bible Journal and all of the different things to write with and enjoy as we, as we tell the story of God's faithfulness in our own hand as we journal our way through the year, a year in the Bible. And what a journey it is when we look back over our notes, over those fieldnotes that we've jotted down over the course of the year. Things that happened that we forgot about but we have hindsight now we see God's faithfulness in all of it, such a worthwhile thing to do and such a beautiful thing to do in your own penmanship, even if it's atrocious it's your own hand with your own hand you wrote the story and that's beautiful. So, check out those resources that are the Daily Audio Bible Shop.

If you want to partner with the Daily Audio Bible, you can do that at dailyaudiobible.com as well. There is a link on the homepage. If you're using the app, you can press the Give button in the upper right-hand corner or the mailing address is P.O. Box 1996 Springhill, Tennessee 37174.

And as always if you have a prayer request or encouragement you can hit the Hotline button in the app or you can dial 877-942-4253.

And that's it for today I'm Brian, I love you and I'll be waiting for you here tomorrow.

Prayers and Encouragements:

This is Trusting God in Texas and I just wanted to thank His Little Sharie for praying for those of us including yourself, who have trouble walking. I have been praying for you since I heard you first speak a couple years ago. I heard you recently talk about having to walk into church with a walker. I know what it’s like to have people look at you because you don't walk well and that you need help walk. I’ve had trouble walking my whole life and even though my Long Walk will consist of the Long Walk for me in the parking lot to the door of my clinic I still pray when I do my Long Walk. I have my husband help me walk and I have a cane. But I wanted to read one of my favorite verses, passages in the Bible and it comes from Isaiah chapter 40 and it says He gives power to the weak, this is 40 verses 29 through 31 He gives power to the weak and to those who have no might he increases strength even you shall faint and be weary and young men shall utterly fall but those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength, they shall mount with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint. God bless all of you who are doing the Long Walk today and we will be praying with you and for you. In Jesus name.

Good morning Daily Audio Bible community this is Diane Olive Brown calling from Newberg, Indiana. And it is July 7th but I’m reading July 6th 2021 and it is 7:04 a.m. central time. And we’re gonna take our Long Walk but I just wanted to say thank you Brian, thank you so much. I started with you and now I’m with Daily Audio Bible Chronological and Daily Audio Bible Kids and I love you so much because you understand me, always spoke healing into my heart, always spoke love. And I began with you and now my husband and my granddaughter are joining me and I just want to say thank you for loving me just the way I am. And I remember the times that were most crucial to me. You would speak something just for me. I don't think you knew it but I want to say thank you and today, I'm going on my Long Walk however it turns out, I’ll report, I’ll send a picture or a short video because this is my Community and I’m all caught up. It took me a long time but I’m all caught up. And I love you guys, I love you.

Good morning DABers. I just want to pray this morning for every request and praise report that we’ve received thus far. Thank You Jesus for hearing the heart of Your people. Lord, we are crying out to You because You are the heart fixer and the mind regulator. And we just want to bless Your name. There are families that are broken Father God, but You bless the broken and save us to be in Your kingdom. We hear the cries of men, literally crying for their position for their heart and their pain. Father God, You are the Balm in Gilead to make the sin sick whole. I would pray for those who are in their bed of affliction who cannot move who are having such a traumatic time with cancer, COVID 19, with all the ailments the devil seems to through at us but Father God You still continue to bless us in our weakness because Your strength is made perfect in our weakness. Lord, it’s just refreshing to hear Your people around the world around the globe, cry out to you in this time that we’re living in. But help us to seek Your face earnestly. Forgive us oh Lord and cleanse our heart, make it pure. Lord, thank You for who You are and who You’ve been to every single one of these DABers throughout their life. Just help us to get a closer walk with You. So that when …

Daily Audio Bible thank you for your ministry it has taught me how to believe in God and I’m so proud and happy for you. I hope that China’s new baby is doing well. And Tyler and Christian, I pray their fine too. And Max, who is probably in college now is doing well, I can tell. And Ezekiel, wow, I’m so amazed at how well he reads, like, I just, it gives me a dynamic understanding of how God works. Thank you for your ministries once again and I hope to see you next time. Bye. Okay we did the community walk, we’re gonna walk again this afternoon. Do you want to say something about that? So, yeah, my grandma just told me we’re going for the community walk and we will have a lot of fun going on this community walk and I feel like talking about how our community has helped us. But my favorite of all the communities is Daily Audio Bible. And my favorite part in that is Daily Audio Bible for Kids. Thank you once again and I look forward to seeing you in person. Bye.

Hi Daily Audio Bible family this is Renzo in Florida and I just want to pray for somebody that I heard on the July 7 recording. I just want to pray for one woman that’s saying that like her family is just going through a lot of like, problems, especially like, to point where there is guns involved. I just want to please pray. Father God I just know that all things are possible through You God. Let the Holy Spirit indwell in all of them. God just let, that you could just take away this escalation. Let there to be restoration in this home God. Completely heal them, guide and protect her as she tries to make peace. God let them to realize that as Christians we can’t be like that, that we can’t start drama, we can’t start stuff and that escalates to that situation God. And help them to realize, let them to have a fatherly loving rebuke from God and let them to be able to understand that they need to stop and fill them up with Your Holy Spirit and fill them up with Your presence and let them to repent of what they’re doing. In Jesus name we pray. Amen. And I just wanted to pray for, I heard somebody that was just struggling with I think mental illness or something like that and just depression and stuff like that. Father God, I just please pray for that person that was struggling with mental illness and depression God and just completely heal them, protect them and guide them and let them to be guided by the Holy Spirit fill them up with your presence, overwhelm them so much that they just have peace, peace that surpasses all understanding. And let them to take refuge in you. In Jesus name I pray. Amen. God Bless you guys, I’m praying for you. Jesus loves you. Bye.

0 notes

doctor-who-hears-a-horton · 6 years

Text

A New Holiday (Ten x Rose)

Rating: General

(Reminder that every piece of fanart made for me, I post. I was given a couple back when I was on Wattpad and I always post them!)

Read it on AO3 here!

Rose convinces the Doctor to go to an American Thanksgiving with her, and he takes her to a place where he knows she'll have a good time.

Note: In 2015 I wrote this, and I kept thinking about it, since today is Thanksgiving, so I thought I'd revamp it (add 900 words) and fix my mistakes to make it better and even fluffier! I hope you guys enjoy it! happy birthday to Doctor Who and Happy Thanksgiving to those who celebrate!

**********

She grinned happily at him and threw her arms out. "Thanksgiving!"

His face was disbelieving at best. He glared at her from around his side of the console, leaning one elbow down on it so he could look closely at her. "Really, Rose? All of time and space, literally anything in the universe, and you want to go to celebrate an American holiday?"

Instead of glorifying that particular remark with a response, she nodded, biting her tongue. Then she decided to glorify it with a response anyway, because she really wanted to convince him. "You know, Doctor, you're the one who always wants to get us involved in different cultures. This one just happens to be American."

"But all they do is eat and watch sports that day!" He whined. "There is absolutely nothing interesting about Thanksgiving."

She furrowed her brows at him and took a step closer to him, "And they spend time with the people they care about most, and remember how lucky they are to have them." She said it with a raise of her eyebrows that seemed to make her point quite clear.

The Doctor had nothing to say to that, because of course, he knew exactly what she was getting at, and it turned out that he would very much like to spend time with her if they went to a Thanksgiving dinner. He sighed, pretending to be put out. "Yeah, alright," he said, and started flipping levers.

"You've never done Thanksgiving, have you?" She asked, grinning up at him.

"No," he replied, "I've never... I've never seen a need for it."

"And now?" She tilted her head, creeping around to his side of the TARDIS.

He looked up at her and nodded slightly, not edging away from her. His eyes were earnest when he nodded again, more defined this time. "Now," he said firmly.

She bit her lip and nodded back at him, turning away slightly. Usually, after the Doctor said something particularly sweet, she needed to give him space, or he would get spooked and bolt towards the library. "So!" She spun back around, farther away from him now, and smiled at him, "Do you know anyplace good to celebrate Thanksgiving?"

The Doctor made a non-committal sound in the back of his throat. "You know, I think I'll leave it a surprise, but trust me, I'm sure you'll like it."

"You're that sure?" She asked.

"Oh, Rose Tyler, if I know anything about you, it's places I'm certain you'll like," he said, and he sounded so confident in it that Rose couldn't bring herself to tease him about it. So, she sat herself on the jump seat and watched him pilot them to their destination, trying not to stare, and thinking about how thankful she was to have him.

***

After a not-so pleasant landing, the Doctor insisted Rose get her coat, which, she didn't fail to notice, looked like a black, feminine cut version of his Janis Joplin coat. Keeping that particular thought to herself but still smiling, she did up some of the buttons and subconsciously reached for his hand. He reached for hers right back and laced their fingers together, moving to give her his very best pinball grin. She returned it, sure she looked just as ridiculous as he did.

"Now, here we are," the Doctor said, bouncing on the balls of his feat as they exited the TARDIS, him pulling her along. "Your Thanksgiving. Oddly enough, it doesn't ever go away. The tradition lives on until the Earth burns, and even when the humans split across the universe, there are still bits of it interwoven into society." He waved his hand about a little bit in the air. "All that... Joy you humans get from eating and spending time together, as you put it... It never really goes away."

Rose listened to his commentary as she took in all of the bits of futuristic Earth, cold but thrumming with activity, people with rosy cheeks strolling about and laughing together. It struck her as odd how excited everyone was to sit down and eat, though she knew there was so much more behind it than just eating. Did they even realize it any more, or were they past it?

"So you never answered me, Doctor," she said casually, swinging their hands just a bit, "Where are we?"

"Why don't you tell me?" he asked her, and she all but rolled her eyes, knowing that he would say something like that. The Doctor really did love to go about things the roundabout way.

"Earth," she said decisively, as she looked around at everything. "Not New Earth, we've only just been there. So obviously, just plain old Earth. America."

"Brilliant," he said, a giant grin on his face. "Go on."

"We're in the future, you can tell by the way everything's built, the structure of the buildings and stuff, right? But I just don't know what century." She looked at him pointedly, telling him she didn't want to guess any more.

"Excellent work," the Doctor said enthusiastically, pride showing through in his voice. He tugged her closer to his side and turned her down to a more scenic road, though the houses were nowhere near suburbia. She admired the amount of big windows and shocking white siding, tucking her head against his shoulder. It was all so beautiful, to say the least.

"Are you going to answer me?" Rose asked patiently, jostling his shoulder playfully after a moment of him not answering her.

"You're almost right on the button," the Doctor said finally as he pulled her up to a nearly gaudy looking house and rang the doorbell soundly. "Rose Tyler, welcome to 51st Century Earth."

"Wait... 51st Century?" Rose's eyes lit up with recognition, and the door flew open, revealing a very excited looking Jack Harkness.

"I could smell it in the air!" He exclaimed, sweeping Rose into a hug that made her wrench her hand from the Doctor's, much to his upset. She giggled and clung to his neck, closing her eyes, reveling in being near her friend again. He dropped her to the ground, kissing her firmly on the mouth before releasing her, making her giggle. "Let me look at you," he said, squeezing her waist.

"Look the same as I did before, Jack," she rolled her eyes at him, even though she had sorely missed his teasing and happy personality.

"No, you've got a better haircut now," he tweaked her ear and turned to the Doctor. "And a better date. Hi, Doc."

Even the Doctor couldn't resist smiling at seeing his old friend. The two men shook hands and the Doctor nodded. "Hello, Jack. It's good to see you."

The two of them shook hands, Jack beaming wildly. He clapped his hands together once he pulled away. "Alright, we're just getting ready to eat, and I assumed somebody would be showing up, just knowing how you are and how Rose is. There's plenty to eat."

Rose hopped a little in place, and Jack ushered them in, taking their coats and sending them off to the table. The table was not occupied by Jack's family, but instead by plenty of his friends, men and women, alien and human. It was a large table, and Rose was instantly accepted into the fold. The Doctor was already well known in most circles, and the two of them found seats next to each other as Jack took the head of the table.

"Now," Jack addressed everyone at the table after everyone started settling down. "All of you say something you're thankful for, and then we'll eat all this stuff."

The people at the table all chuckled at Jack's frankness. All of them, whom the Doctor had assumed would be superficial people, said they were thankful for people, or love, or something else with so much depth that it surprised the Doctor. Maybe people weren't be judged on their time and place, and 51st Century people were not as shallow as he had previously thought.

It was the Doctor's turn all too quickly, and he found that he didn't have to think very hard about what he was thankful for. He reached over and took Rose's hand under the table. She gave him a surprised look as he met her gaze. He smiled softly. "I'm thankful that I have Rose Tyler with me."

The smile that lit her face could've set any Christmas tree ablaze. "I'm thankful the Doctor came back to ask me to come with him a second time."

The two of them sat, grinning like idiots for a moment, before Jack cut in. "That's so sweet," he drawled, though he really was very pleased that the two of them were being so affectionate with each other. "I'm thankful for all of you spending the holiday with me. Go ahead, everyone, eat up!"

Reluctantly, the Doctor relinquished Rose's hand to eat the very classic Thanksgiving dinner that had been put together. Soon, everyone at the table was talking like they had been friends for years, including Rose, who told stories about their adventures, and everyone stopped only when dinner and dessert were eaten and somebody let out a cry of delight.

"It's snowing!"

Rose practically burst out of the house with everyone else, wanting to see the snow that wasn't ash, and she stood with the rest of the guests in the middle of the street, coat forgone to feel every bit of the moment, no matter how cold.

The Doctor followed her at a slower pace, unable to keep from watching her. Her cheeks were pink and her eyes alight with excitement. She had just finished spinning with one of the women they'd eaten with and had her arms outstretched into the flurry. Pretty much unable to stop himself, he went to her and caught her hands before pulling her into a waltz through the street.

He hummed loudly to her and, catching the tune, she picked it up, and they were doing very well until they started giggling, and she tipped her head forward onto his chest. She could feel him laughing, and almost protested his release of her before his hands came up to cup her cheeks and tilted her head so she could look at him in the face. He stroked her cheeks with his thumbs and gazed down at her, his eyes more open then she'd ever seen them.

"I meant it," he said, "I don't know what I'd do without you. I am... Very thankful for you, Rose Tyler."

"Me too," She said softly, her hands slowly lifting to grip his jacket at the waist.

Without saying anything else, he lowered himself to kiss her. They wrapped their arms around each other, holding against the cold. After several perfect seconds, they broke apart slowly, their foreheads pressed together before she leaned back in to kiss him again, this time, tangling her hands in his hair. He pulled her closer against him, daring himself to open his mouth against hers. She squeezed her eyes shut tighter and held him closer, curling her fingers and wishing the moment would never end.

Unfortunately, it did, because she had to breathe, but she pulled him into a hug instead, needing to have him close.

"Stay with me?"

"Course. Forever."

"Well, it's about time, honestly," Jack said as he approached them, his arms crossed, but a huge smile on his face. "They might as well get married now."

Neither the Doctor and Rose heard. They were far too busy holding each other.

#tenrose #ten x rose #tenxrose #ray lu writes fic #raylu writes fic #tenth doctor #rose tyler #thanksgiving #holiday fic #fanfic

22 notes · View notes

rachelbrosnahanweb · 5 years

Text

New Update has been published on Rachel Brosnahan Web

New Post has been published on http://rachel-brosnahan.org/2018/12/12/press-alex-borstein-talks-about-rachel-brosnahan-and-why-she-loves-the-world-of-the-marvelous-mrs-maisel/

Press: Alex Borstein Talks About Rachel Brosnahan and Why She Loves the World of The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel

Sometimes it all comes down to having just the right chemistry. Several years ago, when Alex Borstein heard about Amy Sherman-Palladino and her husband Daniel Palladino’s idea for a television show about a woman in the ’50s doing stand-up, breaking into a man’s business and balancing family, and she was definitely intrigued.

This was two years before Sherman-Palladino actually had a script and mentioned there might be a part for Borstein, who portrays Susie Myerson, the curmudgeonly manager of Miriam “Midge” Maisel (Rachel Brosnahan) in the critically-acclaimed series from Amazon Studios.

The much-anticipated series, which garnered eight Emmy Awards, including Outstanding Comedy Series, recently returned for season 2. The third season of colorful episodes has already been ordered.

Borstein, 47, who won an Emmy for Outstanding Supporting Actress for Mrs. Maisel, has two decades of show business experience in such diverse projects as MADtv, Getting On and the voice of Lois Griffin on Family Guy and films Good Night, Good Luck, Dinner for Schmucks, Ted and A Million Ways to Die in the West. She has known the creators of Mrs. Maisel for many years and appeared as a cranky harpist and eccentric seamstress in the beloved mother-daughter series Gilmore Girls, also from the same creative team.

For Borstein reading the part of Susie opposite of Brosnahan’s Midge for the first time seemed like kismet. “It is really just kind of like speed dating; either it’s there, or not and it was just there,” she recalled. “It was something you can’t really put in a script; that’s how chemistry works.”

How is the second season of Mrs. Maisel different for you than the first? Are you more comfortable in Susie’s skin?

The newness is gone and now you’re stuck with this character, and what do you do to make it different and not hit the same notes all the time? And in Susie and Midge’s relationship, the honeymoon is over. They are, ‘OK, let’s do this. Now, we’re thrust into this relationship. But do I even like you? Can I work with you? Why are you annoying? You’re passive aggressive. Well, you’re aggressive-aggressive.’ So we have all this back and forth because Susie and Midge are a kind of an Odd Couple that happens.

Did you expect both the show and your character to be so well-embraced?

I know that Amy creates incredible worlds and I knew when I read the first script that this was one of those worlds. I knew that the part was special because Susie is such a cool woman to play, as are all of the women in it…I didn’t know how this show would be received but I was pleasantly surprised that it has been so warmly embraced.

What’s it like to be in that world created in The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel? When I watch the show I see this nostalgia for those who remember that time and a yearning for it for those of us who were too young to remember it.

It’s cool because in some ways it feels like this nostalgic fantasy and kind of cozy and safe… In other ways, it was a pretty turbulent time that was coming up with civil rights around the corner… It’s taking a picture of one tiny space within that world but there’s something very warm when you show up to the set and it’s all designed in the ’50s, and the cars from that period are all parked in the streets, and everyone that walks by is Dapper Dan and dressed to the nines. There’s something very lovely and calming about it in today’s crazy world. So, then going out of that world into your real life, is that jarring to you?

Yeah. It’s quite different, but Susie, the character, is hard-assed, and aggressive, and was kind of before her time. So, she doesn’t feel antiquated or old-fashioned. She feels like she could really fit into any time period.

Talk about the chemistry between you and Rachel, because it’s pretty strong right from the pilot and it continues to increase on-screen.

I came to New York to audition for Susie. I probably spent half an hour with Dan and Amy alone and then Rachel came in and we read together. And from the get-go, the chemistry was there. We just had this Mary Tyler Richards-Rhoda kind of thing that just worked and it worked well.

What do you think are the ingredients?

I don’t want to say it was pure luck because Amy wrote it and she said she had me in mind. She’d already found Rachel, so it’s not shocking that it worked, and Amy’s taste is pretty cool, and so she knows what’s going to go together.

It is a phenomenal cast of highly skilled actors, who have really sunk their teeth into these characters.

Like, Tony Shalhoub, I have had a massive crush on him from Galaxy Quest, and I got to know him years ago when he did a guest starring role on MADtv, the sketch show that I was on. I just thought he was amazing and he was so kind, and so cool to work with, and had always been one of my favorite people. When I heard he was doing this show, it was like ‘holy cow,’ here is yet another reason that I couldn’t possibly say no.

Have you worked together yet?

In season 2, our worlds meet a tiny bit. But he and I have yet to really get down and dirty and get to really, really work together. I’m hoping as the show continues to go, there’ll be more and more.

You do work with Michael Zegen, who plays Midge’s husband Joel?

Yes, and the chemistry between Michael and I, playing Joel, is just perfect too, that there is a disdain and a competitiveness between the two characters that it’s really cool and works really well between us.

You’re both vying for Midge’s attention.

It’s a love triangle. It really is.

Have you been to comedy clubs since the show began and did Mrs. Maisel change your perspective of them?

I did stand-up for a lot of years, and I’ll go if there’s somebody I know is there to see them. I still love seeing a well-crafted set, but it’s not my choice for a night out. It’s like I don’t watch sketch comedy anymore after doing MADtv for years.

It sounds like something that your character Susie might say. You must be proud of winning the Emmy Award for Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy. What was the experience like?

Very strange. First of all, I was very late. My parents and one of my best friends, Will, also came with me. He lives close to my parents. So, I told him to come to our house and I will pick everyone up with the car service. So, of course, he was late. We showed up and they wouldn’t let us in. They said, ‘You have to wait until a commercial break.’ And I’m getting texts of ‘Where the hell are you?’ I was like, ‘Excuse me, I don’t want to cause any trouble, but they’re telling me I need to be sitting because I think it’s time for my awards category…’ and they are not letting us sit, they are still telling us we have to wait…

That sounds nerve-wracking.

Yes. It was just very crazy, and stressful, and then finally they’re like, ‘OK, you can go in and sit down.’ Then literally, we sat down, and at that moment they announced, ‘The nominees for Best Supporting Actress are…’ So, I just made it. So when they called my name I was so not prepared in any way.

During the hiatus, are you writing? Are you acting? Are you looking for different projects?

I live in Barcelona, Spain, and I’m doing a musical with a small theater company there that opens on January 31. So, I have two children, and the bulk of my days is getting them to the bus stop, picking them up, going to piano lessons, going to dance, homework and making dinner, yelling at them, bath time, and then I go to rehearsals for this musical, which I’m just loving it so much. The musical is like feeding me.

How old are your children?

My daughter is 6 and my son is 10.

Have they seen the episodes of the Gilmore Girls that you’re in?

No, I don’t think so. I don’t think they’ve seen any Gilmore. They have come to the set of Mrs. Maisel and seen some episodes that we’re shooting. And the project I did before this was called Getting On, and they often came to the set. Well, my baby girl was born on that set, basically, so she was there every day, but my son was about 4 years old at the time and he visited a lot.

Do people recognize you from this show or any other work while your children are around, and what’s that like?

Yeah, people do. It bothers my son a great deal. If someone asks for a photo, he does not like it.

Yeah, he’s being protective.

He gets very angry and he knows that I don’t want him in any photos, so he’ll try to jump in to mess up the photo.

I used to go to Broadway shows in the ’80s and there was a group of autograph collectors who would share their stories. One guy had nearly every famous person who had performed on Broadway for some 50 years.

Well, it’s nice when someone is an actual collector. But now, people wait outside and they have 15 cards and they want you to sign them all, and you know they are going to put them on eBay that night. So I want to say, ‘What are you doing? This isn’t for you. This is Crazy!’

Well, if you put their name on the autograph they are probably not going to sell it.

Many times, I will… If someone says, ‘Can you just sign your name, please?’ I’ll write, ‘To eBay’ and then I sign my name or I sign someone else’s name and they don’t notice until they get home.

Source: Parade

#alex borstein #maiseltv #midge maisel #mrs. maisel #rachel brosnahan #the marvelous mrs. maisel #Press #Television #The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel

1 note · View note