#stop hurting them

[monnonamour]

Seeing robins suffering in bats arms breaks my heart

#stop hurting them #they r just babies that deserve love #Batgirls #Robins #damian wayne #damian al ghul #Jason todd #Red hood #Batman #Bruce wayne #Cass cain #Cassandra cain #stephen amell #Spoiler #Orphan #Black bat #Batfam #Batfamily #batgirl

[llycaons]

He was coming near. Lan Wangji felt his hands being shaken, heard the energetic voice cry, “Lan Zhan! They’ve coaxed you from your hiding-hole! Did you come especially to see me? Or have you become more fond of society since I left?”

changed my mind I want them to stop talking like old british men immediately

#STOP HURTING THEM #ficblogging

[my-working-title]

i’m always a slut for adverbs

fight me

#writblr #writer problems #adverbs are not the devil #stop hurting them #they are wanted and loved

[daenerys-targaryen]

every other episode one of these girls is in goddamned danger 😭

#leah rambles #leah watches stuff #stop HURTING THEM

[akashicrecord]

no offense but if your friend is trying out a new hobby be fucking nice to them

[giantkillerjack]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[bixels]

Just gonna have to wait and see, right? Just wait and see! Just gotta wait and see! Who knows, we'll just have to wait and see! It's anybody's guess, we'll just have to wait and see! The future is exciting, we just gotta wait and see!

#personal #my art #Fuck your fake ass 'i am very smart!' intellectualizing “observations” and open your god damn ears. #do something for fucks sake. it's sickening seeing videos of ai crap and seeing rows and rows of repliers using their one brain synapse #to type “wow! very exciting!” “haha this is kind of scary! but in a really interesting way!” #and then they go about their day without a second thought while creative industries burn around them #i go to one of america's top tech schools too and it's enough to make you wanna tear our your hair #every day it's seminars and talks about “the potential consequences of ai!” when the consequences are happening NOW #NO MORE DISCUSSING NO MORE INTELLECTUALIZING NO MORE SOCRATIC SEMINARS NO MORE DEBATING. ACT YOU COWARDS #people are getting hurt RIGHT NOW. stop pretending to care when you clearly don't! just be honest and say you wanna make money #my time here has really made me hate academic spaces. you people are so god damn useless and cowardly.

[officialplaid]

.

#personal #just love thinking about u knowing ur thinking about her #but noooooo i never rlly loved u #honestly says so much about you youve never seen the love i had/have for u and u never will !!!!!! #ultimately for the best that u dont want me and want a girl who doesnt want you i deserve better and you need to leave women alone #stop hurting them #putting them through mental gymnastics #idk if u still be readin these but idc this is what my tumblr is for sometimes #to rant

[kiwichaeng]

SO ADAM IS A FAKE!!

#ugh i hate everything #stop hurting them #evie's random shit #dynasty #dynasty spoilers

[hinamie]

just looking at these hand poses was enough to give me carpal tunnel and that's how u know they're prime megu material

#my art #jujutsu kaisen #jjk #megumi fushiguro #yuuji itadori #megumi #yuuji #fanart #jjk fanart #itafushi #sometimes u gotta take a break from drawing megumi to draw different megumi and thats on self care #smiling megu for the soul he said heart emoji i said :D #i tried to do the poses myself and . u kno. im not convinced hands are meant to contort that way guys :( it hurt :( #so yuuji can share my pain i think tht bit is cute #tried smth a bit different w the skin rendering and i rly rly like it holy #very early era vacuumchan inspired :'> lov them SM sighs #also ripped megus jacket directly from a pinterest fit bc one of us deserves nice things :(((( #if sukuna wont stop wearing megumi in canon ill just play dress up to cope

[ryssbelle]

Just two kids who got left behind

So now we got Clay's side of the cave in!! He didnt really have time to process any of the emotions he was feeling due to having to immediately run for his life, then guide others to safety alongside Viva.

This was made mostly in response to this fun little tag by @zivazivc

I wasn't planning on drawing it up so soon but AUGH I had to, also ty I pride myself in drawing raw emotions

Btw I do read all the tags and comments I get on my posts I'm very happy to have crushed you all thoroughly 💖

#my art #n2 au #trolls #trolls 3 #trolls au #trolls band together #trolls clay #trolls viva #trolls john dory #im having a lot of fun #i also have like 4 or 5 mor posts locked and loaded about this au #ill probably schedule them to go out for the next few days while i work on other stuff #but ill still like answer asks #i just have been hyper fixating on this and i forgor i have another comic im supposed to be focusing on #but thats for another day #im really excited to share all the silly things ive made #theres quite a few #when i go bonkers insane about something i go #bonkers insane #my wrist hurts so bad but that will not stop me #im so much stronger than possible carpal tunnel #but yeah about little clay doh #he is not well lmao #mentally or physically #hes grieving and terrified and theres so much responsibility on his shoulders #he also feels like its his fault if JD got caught in the cave in #because if hed gone back with his brothers before the escape JD wouldnt have to go back for him #but he loves being with Viva so #its a whole mess of emotions #the reunion with his bros minus jd when they find him is going to be very different

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 71

Klarion is delighted, excited, impatient, and so very happy. He’s found a friend, not the justice league baby-crew who don’t know how to make friends properly or the order-magician who doesn’t play right, but another realm-being his age! They’re even around the same death-date, his is just a couple years earlier! But to beings who aren’t adults until they’re well into the hundreds that’s practically nothing!

His new friend even has a familiar too- even if he has to explain what a familiar is- and, and even shares his two other friends with him! 

He’s been in this world for what feels like so long trying to make friends and he’s made three in just a month! And they even know how to properly play and wrestle without targeting Teekl like a certain order lord who he doesn’t like. 

Oh! Hey it’s the justice league kiddy-crew! Were they feeling neglected or something?

#chaotic friendship au #dcxdp #dpxdc #prompts #klarion is roughly 4 years older in death years than danny #he found another baby ancient godling! #klarion is trying to cause mischief and play but there's a big culture clash #he's very confused why the young justice team only come for playdates whenever he pulls pranks #But now they've come over for a playdate all on their own!! #Phantom look at them they're learning he's so proud! #Someone: Klarion is very childish & destructive- #Tucker and Sam: He's only six stop being mean to him and his emotional support cat >:/ #Danny is delighted to have a friend whose also down for pranks and chaos but who understands he also has things like school #Realms familiars are emotional support animals that help their respective being #Since realms beings are usually half emotions (at least in core) hurting a familiar hurts their 'ghost' too #Danny's rogues just saw new door open and wanted to play #I mean look at them they're all like 30 years old at most #to the infinite realms that's like nothing #The fentons punched a hole in reality in the equivalent of one of the daycare areas of the zone that formed *after* they had put Pariah the #klarion the witch boy #danny fenton #Danny & Klarion when meeting Ellie: Its free battle friend #Dan will be so confused because in his timeline he never became friends with this other... holy fuck is this another halfa-

[lilnasxvevo]

I love you Monkey D. Luffy I love you protecting the power of friendship through the power of incredible violence

#I just watched the episode where he finds out Bellamy beat and robbed Cricket while they were gone #and Luffy and Zoro turn to each other and immediately nonverbally communicate #ok Luffy is gonna go beat the shit out of that guy and Zoro is going to stay here #I love that Luffy will do anything for people who have been good to him and I love that often the only thing he can do for them is #beat the snot out of the people who hurt his friends #now granted. often beating the snot out of people leads to other results #(like how beating Bellamy got his crew to give Luffy the gold artifacts back) #(or how most fights Luffy enters is with the goal of getting someone to STOP hurting people) #but I just find it endearing that he’s very. when you have a hammer (Devil Fruit) everything looks like a nail (hurting people)

[kerryweaverlesbian]

Thinking about Cas roped into a little kids teaparty while they're investigating a case and being firmly told he's a princess and a plastic crown slapped onto his head and Dean checks in on him saying "hey you wanna come to [next investigation scene]?" And all the kids go noooooo bc they love Cas bc he's Weird and very serious and patient with them about their games which is very funny to them and he pays focused attention which almost always makes kids happy.

And Cas, very solemn, goes "I'm a princess now Dean, I need to oversee my kingdom's affairs". And it becomes a comedy C plot of Cas n the kids fantasy game getting really politically detailed and fucked up while the boys do all the investigation work. Maybe there's some cut-betweens of the kids fantasy violence of smashing dolls together and Sam n Dean getting thrown around.

#the joke is how engaged he is in the game not that he's a princess #he's a princess bc he'd make a cute princess is all #i think cas IS good with kids but it's not quite in the way that's depicted in the show when he talks to that one little girl with Hannah #he's good with kids because he gives a lot of attention and would let them do whatever play they needed to and would stop them getting hurt #but would let them try difficult things rather thab do things for them #and he's remarkably patient unless it's with someone he already doesn't like

[angst-and-fajitas]

I think loveless aros deserve a thousand dollars for every time someone claims that love is the meaning of everything or love makes us human etc etc

"by love we mean all forms of love, including nonromantic!!1!" You clearly Do Not understand. Return to start, do not pass go, do not collect 200 dollars.

There is no center of the universe, there is no unified meaning of everything, and there is no social or biological trait that "makes us human" besides the literal being humans thing, and any attempt to assert otherwise will other and alienate more people. There is no one emotion that you need to feel in order to be a good person or even a person at all

#i also think they deserve giant medieval spiked maces but y'all aren't ready for that conversation yet #i ain't even a loveless aro but man will I go to bat for them #such a big part of dismantling amatonormativity is decentering ALL love #to end this eternal pressure for people to feel and identify their feelings in the same ways as others #we don't all need the same outlook.... we don't all need to feel the same things in order to be good people #aromantic #i dunno man. i just Keep Seeing these stupid posts..... and I know people just don't even understand #but they should make the effort to understand!!! #i listened and I learned and I stopped talking like that! because I saw what that does to people and how much it hurts!

[lunarrolls]

listen so closely to me i think liliana temult is a fascinating character and she’s really fun to examine morally but also nothing will ever come fucking close catharsis-wise to watching ashton and orym fucking cross examine her ass in episode 92. the sexiest shit i’ve ever seen “your worst fear is probably my worst fear, and i think we just got a little sample (my worst fear came true because you weren’t fast enough, what will you do when it’s her head on the line?)” and “keep wrestling (you must bear the weight of their deaths on your conscience and know it will never be enough for what you took from me)” like holy SHIT you guys

#cr #cr3 #cr spoilers #liliana temult #ashton greymoore #orym #like. imogen was 100% valid for telling them to step the fuck off but also i lowkey just wanna see them scream at her #ashton and orym buried their families because of people like this woman #they have both killed people like this woman. misguided and lost and selfish people. but people nonetheless #they have borne that blood on their hands and neither of them have stopped wrestling with it because they know how much it hurts #so for liliana to constantly play fast and loose with her only daughter. to leave her husband a husk of himself. #of course it strikes home for them. ashton was that kid. orym was that husband. different circumstances #but it stings all the same. it’s insane. it’s SO good though #ONCE AGAIN. IMOGEN IS SO FAIR FOR TELLING THEM TO PLEASE NOT PUSH HER MOM OFF THE CLIFF OF FULL VILLAINY AGAIN #but ooouhjhhggggh #roll history