#the first time I heard it I was immediately like oh. this is come on feel the illinoise

[brailsthesmolgurl]

PUPPY LOVE?

Preview: You had always been the apple to their eyes. How would they express their affection towards you in highschool?

Warnings: I had to make it slight-slight-slight angsty hehe, teeth-rotting fluff for comfort for my beloved readers <3 btw readers and the boys are highschool kids in this one-shot so no suggestive or anything!

P.S: This idea came to me in the middle of the night and I knew I had to burn the midnight fuel to squeeze all of my brain juice for this piece :> Enjoyyy!

RAFAYEL

You lifted your head up when you heard a chair dragged against the tiled flooring. It came to a halt and down sat the lilac haired fellow, right in front of you, his chin propped on the back of his hand as he leaned down to look at you, a smirk hung on his thin lips. Rafayel. "Someone looked like they had a nightmare yesterday."

"It's none of your business." You furrowed your eyebrows, gaze turned towards the classroom door. More classmates are starting to walk in, greeting each other good mornings and immediately getting into their daily routines of catching up or gossiping. You, on the other hand, do not really belong to any 'gangs'. You find solace within your own bubble and occasionally, do hang out with your only friend, Tara.

The purple haired individual in front of you frowned, your answer unappealing to his taste. This young man sitting in front of you is the lucky charm of your school, and almost everyone dotes on him, headmaster, teachers and students alike. Both of his parents are renowned artists, comparable to Van Gogh and many other artists throughout history books and as expected, Rafayel inherited the same talent as his parents. Rich, handsome, charming and talented, he is basically a girl magnet.

"You do not have to be so rude you know." He stood up when he heard his name being called. Reaching into the pockets of his blazer, he took out two cheese sticks and placed it onto your table. "Here, have this. Your frown makes you look like a shriveled up prune. Some cheese sticks would probably do well for you." He chuckled teasingly and stepped out of your personal bubble, heading out of the classroom.

If glares could kill, you would probably be laying on the floor motionless by now. The cheese sticks that sat at your table were attracting unwanted attention from the girls in your class. You had absolutely no idea why Rafayel would always approach you. The attention you are receiving from him does not beat the attention other girls are getting as well, not that you cared but you just find it odd. A lone girl getting so much attention from the school's celebrity, what would the others think of it? Maybe he is just trying to be friendly. That always remains the reason to your question.

Here comes the other question. You do not think you like him, but why does your heart flutter whenever he is near you? Bidding you good morning and goodbye had became a part of a routine for the both of you. Why would your heartstrings tug whenever you find another girl initiating skinship with him? Why?

*＊✿❀○❀✿＊*

Rinnnggggg. The bell rung, indicating the end of another school day. Students rushed out like ants out of the school premises, flooding the empty hallways. You packed your things, eyeing the time displayed by the clock. 3pm. It is the perfect time for you to go to the art room to practice some drawing. You may not be an artist like the talented Rafayel, but you still do have your own fascination towards drawing and sketching.

You walked in the direction opposite of the flow, passing through the crowd like a fish trying to swim upstream. As you were nearing the art room, someone knocked you over and you fell backwards, with your bagpack being your cushion as you landed back first onto the floor. You still winced upon impact. "Oh look, it's Rafy's pet." The girl that knocked you over crossed her arms, her blond curls tied up in a high ponytail. Oh, it's the school's flower girl, Jarianne, but you guessed it. She is nowhere carrying the aura of a flower.

Sighing, you pushed yourself off of your back, not even having the thought to fight back. "Know your place would you?" Jarianne spoke, studying her oval shaped painted nails. "Rafy might give you cheese sticks every once in a while, but that does not mean anything. Don't get your hopes up, okay sweetie?" Huffing a smile, the mean girl strutted off, leaving you calculating your next steps.

Shrouded with anger, you got up and made your way towards the art room. You are ready to splash some paint onto the canvas, wanting to express your anger in a much more 'healthier' form. She was right. Who are you to be engaged with Rafayel. Someone who is a loner like you should not be in any way associated with someone of such a high status like him. You are halfway at being disappointed at yourself until you slide the door opened and you saw Rafayel in the art room.

He looked ethereal, basked in the warm light of the sun in the midst of a cloudy afternoon, his lilac hair slightly tousled on his head. His back was facing you, but you could tell with the way his paintbrush moved across the canvas with grand gestures, he is painting yet another masterpiece. Part of his uniform, the dark blue blazer and white collared shirt was messily tossed onto one of the desks nearby, and he is left in his black t-shirt. Right when you are about to leave, his head snapped around and he caught sight of you standing in the doorway with beady eyes. "Finally, you're here." Framing himself to be waiting for you this whole time. Well, he was.

"I'm... I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bother you." You consciously tucked a stray strand of your brunette curls behind your ear, your face immediately turning red when you realised that you may have taken a bit longer then usual to be staring at the young man. "I'm gonna go." You turned and immediately started jogging down the hallway.

"Wait! Wait!" Rafayel called out for you, yet, you did not bother to turn back. All you could hear was the sounds of chairs creaking and a loud thud, followed by hurried footsteps.

You turned a corner and slid yourself into an empty classroom to catch your breath. When you sat yourself down, the door slid right open and Rafayel presented himself, huffing and panting as he bent himself down to slow his breaths. You were shocked of course, that he would run down the halls for you. Jarianne's words rang through your head like an alarm and it filled you with more regrets.

"You should stop talking to me." You clenched your fist, standing up, getting ready to leave. "We are not friends to begin with, so we should keep it that way." When you walked past him, he gripped your wrist and you gasped in response. "What do you think you're doing?"

"Do you actually..." He took in a huge breath and straightened his posture, now eyes meeting yours. "Are you actually so naive?"

"Look, I don't know what you are trying to do Rafayel, but I am not interested in whatever you are going to say. Just leave me alone." You pulled your wrist out of his grip but it only prompted him to hold your wrist tighter. "Leave me be!"

You slipped, and he grabbed you by your waist, underestimating the strength of his before he stumbled backwards and you ended up pressing him against the wall. The both of you had the same expression, widened eyes and flushed cheeks. Tension immediately started pumping into the air, causing your body to tense up. "Are you upset?" He broke the silence between you two, leaning down closer to you to inspect your face. "I had never seen you getting so mad before."

MAYBE. JUST MAYBE. A part of you do like him, you liked that he would only greet you in the morning and when you leave home, you liked that he would offer to teach you art anytime you wish, you liked that sometimes he would ditch his friends just to come and sit with you during recess. But, Jarianne was right. You always have this part of you that refused to accept the fact that you do indeed, like Rafayel. Just like all of the other girls out there. It's just that you are nothing special at all. You will be regarded as any other fan girl of his.

Hesitation laced in your voice. "I just don't think someone like you should be spending time with someone like me Rafayel." Your gaze dropped, feet shuffled against the floor beneath, watching the dust particles flying up into the air.

He clicked his tongue, but remained still. "You have not answered my question. Why do you think I go out of my way to talk to you everyday hmm?" Your silence was met with the continuation of his thoughts. "That's because I like you, y/n."

Your breath hitched in your throat when he confessed to you and you nervously took a step back to put more space in between the both of you. "Don't." His arms snaked around your waist and he reeled you in, nose tips almost touching. It took you a while to only realise that Rafayel is red like a tomato, the confession of his happen to be genuine afterall. His blushing expression is a sight to behold. Just like in a watercolour painting, all of the colours are harmonised, his purplish, tousled soft curls that sat on top of his head framed the outline of his carved facial shape well, with scarlet red lightly dabbed across his pale cheeks, giving the illusion of his eyes sticking out like magenta gemstones on a iridescent rubicund-white marble complexion. "I really do like you y/n."

"Why?" That is the only question you can mutter out of your mouth. You sounded dumb for a second but you would like to find out what he deemed special about you.

You can sense his nervousness when his eyes started darting everywhere and his arms withdrew from your waist. "I...You're...Uhm..." He is clearly struggling with his words. "You are different. You do not find the need to please me or to catch my attention." His words were spoken slowly and precisely, calculated even. "I like you because of the way you are, y/n. You are not like the other girls. Sometimes, when I look at you, I wanted to sketch a drawing of you, but I couldn't, because that's how alluring you are to me. No drawings could achieve that."

The way he phrased his affection towards you, was nothing of confidence but only of his vulnerability. Five years throughout his secondary days, you always regarded him to be the embodiment of confidence, carrying himself well has always been a gestalt of his. But today, you do not find that in him, all you see is this young man stumbling over every single word, self-doubt equivalent to yours hinted in his tone. He does not see himself to be worthy of you, just like you do not think you are worthy to him. The thought of it ached your heart.

"Rafayel. I...I never knew you liked me." Reaching your hands up, you patted his shoulders awkwardly, not really knowing where to position your hands. "I thought you just wanted to tease me and push me around like a plaything."

"The audacity to say that." He scoffed, face scrunched up like a shriveled prune he had mentioned to you earlier. "I don't like keeping the people I like as pets or any derogatory words you may think of, you know?" The sight of you holding onto his shoulders, eyes widened made him smile, one of his hand lightly patting the top of your head. Rafayel notices the way your lips would wobble the slightest when you tried to alleviate your own anxiety, convincing him further that you do possess the same feelings as him. He only has to figure out how to make you believe that he is not messing with your feelings and how to not escalate this sweet moment into a dramatic and awkward mess. "I don't want you to be accusing me of something so lowly anymore, yeah? Promise me?"

"But... what would people say when they see..." You gestured between the two of you, head already coming up with all sorts of accusations that would be thrown towards the both of you. "Us together? I don't want to trouble you..."

"They can say anything, but we can treat it as nothing y/n." He ran his hand down to your cheek, cupping your small face in his palm now, your face slowly warming up in his palm. "In the end, I chose you. It is only right for them to be jealous." He smiled leisurely, confidence resurfacing again. "So, would you date me y/n?"

Gnawing onto your lip, you nodded your head and looked down. You had only seen this in romance shows, where lip kisses are supposed to happen after confessions do. But you felt his soft lips collided against your forehead and your heart released sparks of fire uncontrollably. You are screaming internally as if you had won the lottery. As he pulled back, you raised your head up to glance at his facial features. Rafayel is beaming, hand still placed on the side of your cheek. As if it was cued, he managed to answer your question before you could even ask. "I will not kiss your lips until you allow me to, yeah? I will always wait until you're ready, as I respect---"

Wrong question, but does not beat the fact it was relevant to what you were initially going to ask him. Something along the lines of ‘whether are we going in for the kiss’. You decided to act upon your decision. Closing the short distance between you two, you planted your lips onto his, swallowing his uncertainty to fuel your bravery for the upcoming challenges you will have to face for being Rafayel's girl.

ZAYNE

"So, for this experiment, find someone you can pair up with to write a report based on your findings." Miss Akko instructed, placing the chalk onto her large wooden desk and scanning the crowd for any blank slates. "If you have any questions, you can always come and find me for consultations."

You looked towards the guy sitting next to you, Zayne. Ballpoint pen held in between his long fingers, gliding swiftly against the paper to create a neat yet slanted handwriting. Altough the class had ended, you could tell that he is still very much in his zone, jotting down whatever the teacher had mentioned earlier. If he could record it, you believe that would be the most viable way for him to stay on top of his grades all of the time. His posture relaxed when the last bell of the day rung. "Hey." You called out to him and he turned his head to face you. "Would you like to pair up? For the experiment?"

You had paired up with him for a few times for chemistry class. Being with the smartest kid does earn you a few perks, but he is not much of a talker so sometimes doing assignments with him would result in a crow-cawing awkwardness. "Sure." He nodded his head once and started gathering his reading materials into a pile while standing up.

Zayne has always been a man of a few words. Nodding is his most useful reaction whenever you ask him of something that he is borderline interested in. But if he does not agree with you, then he shall give you the stare that would make you question yourself about the absence of an answer from him. "When do you plan to do---"

"I will see you after class tomorrow." He cut you off, zipping his bag up and pulling it over his broad shoulders effortlessly. "Remember to bring your brain." OOF, COLD. It most likely explains why nobody would usually pair up with Zayne. More like he just refuses to.

Zayne was best known for his good looks and big brain but other than that, he does not have an appealing personality that makes him desirable among girls. Good to admire from afar but not good to interact with. Ever heard of the trend 'He is a 10 but...' . Yeah, that is Zayne's title trend. Only to people who has been in close contact with him. Yeah, he could be a dick with how straightforward he is but you find it as an admirable trait of his. He stabs people with his words, with truths that nobody would dare to say and maybe, you do secretly like him for the way he is.

“Come on Zayne, it’s not like I don’t study or help out with the reports for the past few times.” You rebutted, palms faced upwards and eyebrows knitted closely together. Zayne stood in his spot, expressionless face hiding his amusement. “So I do have a brain!”

He turned towards the direction of the door and started making his way out, not without giving his last statement. “Says the one who can’t even score a decent C grade.” There you stood, in the empty classroom, choked onto the curse words that you were about to throw at him when you heard his statement but you are sure with his lanky legs, he would have been out of earshot by now.

*＊✿❀○❀✿＊*

TAP TAP TAP TAP… Your footsteps echoed in the empty hallways, reverberating through the empty classrooms. You were late for the meeting with Zayne because you had forgotten to bring your lunch to school today so you ended up having to run down to the vending machine to grab some quick bites. The machine however, betrayed your trust, the ultimate cliche move anyone can think of putting into a filler clip for a movie, when the snack gets stuck during the retrieving period purely because of the vending machine error. You could have easily gotten in trouble if anyone were to spot you with your whole arm shoved into the machine just to grab the item you had literally paid for.

The door slammed open with force and you were greeted with the sight of Zayne in the classroom. With a girl bent halfway down right next to him. You recognised her immediately, the long blond hair with forest green eyes, milky pale skin with a smile that could make anyone faint upon seeing it. She is the school’s student president, Nyla. The both of them perked their heads up, reacting to the sound of the door being slammed opened only to see you standing in the doorway, face flushed from the heat, holding onto your snacks in your hand. “Hey y/n.” The student president grinned, her pearly whites nearly blinded you. “Do you mind giving us some time? We have some personal matters to settle.” Not only does she look pretty, she has a pleasing attitude too? Just great. Pursing your lips, you nodded and went out the same way you came in, sliding the door closed behind you in a more polite manner this time.

“I still can’t believe that you are working on an assignment with her.” Nyla huffed, pushing her hair back with her fingers as she bent down next to Zayne again, staring at his notebook. Nyla had initially wanted to meet up with Zayne regarding the discussion for the upcoming school festival that will be held but eventually, she turned it into her personal chat session with Zayne. “Is she a freeloader most of the time?”

“No.” Zayne replied. “She does her part as I do for mine.” Zayne, at this point had already caught note on what Nyla is trying to do. Provoking a conversation out of him when he is late for the initial assignment arrangement with you bothers him. “I think you had already gotten all of the answers you needed for the school festival.”

“But, I would like to get to know you too.” Nyla sat herself onto the side of his desk, manicured fingers fanned herself in an attempt to cool herself down. “Say, how about we try to go out for a little bit hmm?”

The raven haired young man did not even spared her a glance, eyes focused on his handwritings. “Zayne, come on. Smarty pants with a cute face like you dating me would be the talk of the school for weeks to come.” The pitch of her voice heightens at the end of her sentence and Zayne sighed in frustration. Closing his eyes, he took in a deep breath and exhaled.

“I am not interested in being your pawn.” He glanced at her and her smile faltered, alongside her confidence. “Nor do I find the necessity to feed into the delusions of yours.” The indifference shown on his body language gave her the conclusion she did not expected from him. Her pretentious ‘girl-next-door’ attitude no longer on display. The anger of a spoiled child who gets whatever they want seeped through and she raised her palm, ready to land it onto his cheek but he caught it right before it touches his cheek. “I wouldn’t do it to someone who believes in gender equality.”

Nyla withdrew her hand, strings of curse words falling out of her lips as to save herself from embarrassment and she left the classroom. The young man sat in the room, staring at the new page he had just flipped over on his notebook and he noticed the drawing of a stick man next to the page number. The stick man appeared to be holding onto the number 6 like a hockey stick and the 0 being reimagined as a puck. His lips pulled into a small smile, flashing back to the time when you tried to be sneaky when he was out of the classroom during one of your past assignment pairings, conducting this tomfoolery on his notebook and quickly returning everything back to its original position. But he saw it all, from the crack of the door when he was about to enter the empty classroom. He finds your childlike behaviour amusing after all.

*＊✿❀○❀✿＊*

“We are done talking.” You stared up, the blinding sunlight immediately getting shielded by Zayne’s opaque outline. You squinted your eyes narrower only to find that Zayne has his hand stretched out to you, given you are in a seated position. “We should get started on our assignment.” You took his hand and he pulled you up, the sheer size of his palm wrapped around your whole hand easily.

“Here.” You reached your hand into the pocket of your uniform and pulled out a small box of chocolate cookies. “This is for you. It fell out when I was trying to grapple for my sandwich.”

Zayne took the box into his hands, contemplating on the way you got it. “Did the vending machine got stuck again?” Your nod made him smiled a little. “If it gets stuck again next time, you can just ask me to get it for you.”

His sudden suggestion nearly made you choked on the last bite of your egg and cheese sandwich. It is hard to believe he would come out all of the way here to find you, let alone making small talk and telling you that you can ask him to solve your troubles whenever you please? But your dumb brain only believe that he was only trying to be helpful and he is merely thanking you for bringing him a snack. “So what did you guys talk about?” You could not help but to ask as the both of you slowed down your steps to be in sync with one another.

“She wanted me to go out on a date with her.” You were lucky you had finished your sandwich, or else this sentence would have sent you into full on choking mode. You did expect Nyla to ask him out to a certain extent given his popularity, but you were caught off guard that he was even willing to share the details about what had went on behind those closed doors earlier. “I told her that there is not a need to waste her time.”

Hm? You stopped in your footsteps and turned to look at him. “What do you mean?” Your lips had blurted out the sentence before your mind is in control and you swallowed the instant regret of the question. Zayne too, stopped in his footsteps and he looked at you, his hazel green orbs stood out more like a lush forest under the blazing sun above your head. When he took a step towards you, your heart lurched, eyes scanning the surroundings for anyone present.

“I already have someone on my mind.” Zayne closed the distance between the both of you. Within arms length, Zayne reached his right hand outwards and held your cheek. An immediate gasp could be heard, the pace of your heartbeat quickened, so as your breath. You could hear your own heartbeat in your head. It does not take a genius for one to unravel who he likes. You stood in front of him, drinking in his gaze that had softened for one of the very few times, and this time he did not snap his head away immediately. His thumb moved back and forth on your cheek, soothing the spreading redness that is a result of your realisation regarding his point.

Your eyes lit up and your jaw slacked, eyes frantically searching for a joke within his eyes but when you found no ill intention, you amounted to satisfy your curiosity. “Why…why me?”

His thumb slid down to your jawline, and stopped at your chin. Raising it up just enough for his eyes to be looking into yours and you gulped nervously when he closed the distance between the both of you. He smiled, lips tugged up slightly on both corners because all these while, he knew that the both of you have the same feelings for one another, but he just never really have the opportunity to be alone with you, till now. "You will find out soon enough." Leaning down, Zayne pressed his lips softly against yours to present his confession to you, stealing your first kiss away.

XAVIER

The countdown in your head never fails you. When the minute hand hits 12 on the clock, the bell rung, the teacher looked up from the book he was holding, glasses slid down his nose slightly as he realised his class period had came to an end. "Remember your homework kids. I will see you next week." He announced as the students all got up in sync, bowing and thanking the teacher for his teaching efforts.

As you landed your bum back onto your chair, you heard someone calling your name and your head turned towards the source of the sound. The blond bloke named Xavier sauntered over to you, his eyelids still half closed. "Hey, you going over for the fencing extracurricular later?"

"Yeah I am. Why?" You asked him nonchalantly, all while clearing your items off of the table and placing them into your bagpack. When you do not hear his response, your hands rested on your bag and you looked up at him, squinting your eyes. "Wait. You plan to skip it don't you?"

Xavier's eyes widened and his light eyebrows arched upwards. "What, no. I just..." His right hand reached up to rub the nape of his neck. "I just thought we could walk there together if you'd like."

Sighing in relief you smiled and nodded, pulling your bagpack over your back. You had forgotten to arrange the books you have to bring today hence the load of your bag became a deadweight and it nearly sent you rolling onto the ground. Xavier caught you on time before your face gets planted onto the tiled ground. "Careful. Here, let me help."

"Thanks." The blond young man easily took your bagpack off of your back, slinging it over the side of his shoulder that has his messenger bag hung onto. With the weight of fingerpads pressed against your arm, you flushed red when you realised that he had not released his hold on you. Catching your sight, he trailed it down to your arm and he released his grip, equally embarassed at how long the skinship lasted.

Truth is, you and Xavier are somewhat at the level of best friends. The both of you share the same classes and same taste for food, alongside same extra curricular activities. But recently, you started feeling more and more abashed around him. You would consciously want to look good in front of him; either it be tucking your hair behind your ears, chuckling gently instead of laughing like a troll, ironing your clothes to make it look pressed and neat. You are like becoming a whole different person just for him. But it is not necessarily for the bad.

*＊✿❀○❀✿＊*

Clank, Clink, Clank Clank. The sounds of the blades grinding against one another created screeches and clinking, which are not the right music for the ears. You sat a couple of meters away from the mat, eyeing Xavier clad in the metallic polyester jacket that is overlain with a thin, interwoven steel strands in between to provide him protection. Lamés is the right term for the protective gear on his torso. Gasps and mutters could be heard echoing in the huge hall, judgements and commentaries thrown around as the showdown between Xavier and his opponent has been relatively entertaining.

The whole nine minutes, both of the fencers has been extremely aggressive, parrying and lunging against one another whenever an opening is spotted. The race to land 15 touches on the opponent make it an extremely fast and deft sport. The both of them had equated to 14 touches each and this last touch would determine the winner. The referee stood in middle, arms raised midway to insinuate the start of the tie-breaker round. "Pret? Allez!"

The blades then ensued, waving in the air. "Halt." It was called out in two seconds and both of the opponents backed up, standing still in their spots. Your heartbeat thumped, the last you saw was the both of their blades touched both of their respective opponent's foil. It is hard to determine who is the winner. The referee was seen walking over to Xavier and he spoke. "Parrying then riposte, point-in-line is perfect and that forward extension of yours is worth the risk." He grabbed Xavier's arm and raised it, everyone in the hall cheered as Xavier removed his headgear and grinned, eyes landing onto you.

You smiled back, proud that he had manage to win the competition. You stood up when he walked off of the platform, wanting to congratulate him but Chiara beat you to it. "Xavier! You did so well!" The girl bounced over, her curls bounced to her footsteps' rhythm as well. "Oh my god, that was such a fight."

"Thanks." Xavier smiled and she grabbed him by his neck, throwing herself into his arms and you were stunned at her boldness. Xavier however, did not seem fazed as his arms raised up to pat her back. Chiara may just be an amiable individual but your mind abnegated that possibility and only opened its chamber doors to jealousy.

In a disconsolate, nervous manner, you turned and proceeded to walk out of the hall. Your heart thumped hard against your chest like booming speakers in an EDM concert. It also caused a lump to form in your throat. It hurts. Something about her just greeting and hugging him so casually made her wonder why did he never told you about his girlfriend before? He is already mysterious enough but at this point, it felt like a betrayal to you. But then again, he does not owe you that favour to tell you about his dating life if he does not wish to say anything.

Finding a cosy corner next to the herb garden that belonged to the Plant Society, you sat down at the side of the curb and amused yourself with the view of butterflies twirling around blooming flower petals. Amongst the weeds, Magnolia blossoms are most of the denizens found within the small patch of ground. Time passed by, perhaps around a couple of minutes and you heard hurried footsteps in the background but you were too engrossed with the butterfly landing onto a magnolia's carpels that you did not bother to turn around.

"Y/n." Xavier called out. "I had been searching everywhere for you." You turned your head slowly, stopping with only half of your face visible to him. "Did you noticed me winning just now?" "Yeah I did." You pushed yourself off of the curb, dusting the dirt off of your dark skirt and you faced him, gaze catching his chest rather than his cerulean orbs. "In fact, I saw Chiara went up to hug you." Your pout although not shown, it was obvious to Xavier. You are jealous.

He stepped forward and wrapped his lanky arms around you, pulling you into his chest. You were bewildered. In his arms, feeling his warmth spreading to your body and his scent swathed you, he smells like clean sheets and a bubble bath. Perhaps from his change of clothes. "I'm sorry." He spoke, breath batting against the nape of your neck. "I should have rejected her hug right then and there."

"It's okay Xavier, I didn't know you have a girlfriend." You were quick to address your hesitation, ready to take a step back from him but his hold around you tightened, not allowing you to leave his arms.

"She isn't. She isn't my girlfriend, y/n." He slowly pulled back, arms now moved to rest on your shoulder. For a moment, a gleam of wary was ready to surface but Xavier was quick to put out that emotion of his. "I don't think of her anything more than a friend. Unlike you."

Confusion clouded you like a misty apparition above your head. "What about me?" Your index finger pointed towards yourself. "What do you mean by 'unlike me'."

"I like you." His gaze unwavering, genuine intentions full on display. "I had liked you for a very long time y/n." Your jaw dropped to the ground almost instantly. You were not expecting this to happen at all but look at how fate has presented itself. Xavier smiled, his angelic smile akin to his divine features. He would have been mistaken to be an angel if you did not know that the halo around his head is the sun peeking out from the back of his head. “And I think I would very much like you to be my girlfriend instead of her.”

Your eyelids blinked rapidly, eyelashes just a few more blinks away to cool down the redness in your cheeks. As a reflex, your hands flew up to your mouth to mask your excitement, your lips probably pulled into a grin that stretches to both ears. “I…I…” Your stammering further betrayed your feelings and Xavier leaned down, supple hands held onto your wrist and he pulled your hands down, finally being able to see your shyful expression.

“Seeing you like this makes me very happy y/n.” He cupped your cheeks softly, tediously brushing the pads of his thumb across your cheek and he leaned in, planting a kiss onto your lips to officially make you his girlfriend.

Hope this fluff makes your day my lovelies! <3

#love and deepspace #love and deepspace x reader #rafayel love and deepspace #zayne love and deepspace #lnds #xavier love and deepspace #fluffy #rafayel x reader #zayne x reader #xavier x reader

[wandascrush]

Breath of fresh air

Pairings: Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Pregnancy, kissing, small hurt, mention of injuries

It was so nice to finally get outside and have some fresh air. The last few days you were stuck looking out the bay window as it poured and poured. Natasha, your wife and soon to be mother of your child, was extremely overprotective and made sure while she was gone that Laura watched over you from time to time.

The Barton’s only lived less than one acre over, on a small but beautiful farm of their own with their 3 mini Barton’s. They had actually given you and Natasha the idea to live off the grid, and who better to have as neighbors than the people who had become your guys’ family.

Especially Laura, she was one of your closest confidants and you loved causing chaos with her. Being a recent agent-out-of-commission due to your pregnancy was different, especially not training as hard and sleeping in, but as your symptoms really kicked up, you were grateful for the break. Recently entering the second trimester had not been easy. It was nice having someone like Laura to talk to, who really understood.

Natasha was scheduled to come back next Wednesday, and God were you ready for her to be home. It was hard to sleep without her soft touch, the Russian lullabies she sang you and the baby every night, and the way she'd gently rest her hand on your back throughout the day as a reminder she's there for you. Sometimes she'd come home with baby clothes or an extra teddy bear she'd seen for the baby's nursery, and in those moments there was no doubt in your mind that she’d make the most beautiful mother.

As you were drinking your tea and reading your favorite piece of poetry, an extremely loud whirring sound caught your attention. Using your book as a shield from the sun, you looked up to the sky to find the Quinjet making a rocky landing in your field, swaying the grass in waves. Almost immediately, Laura came out of her house with her kids trailing behind, worry and confusion written all over their faces. You went to each others sides, "What's going on Laur? Are they okay?"

"I'm sure their fine, relax, it's gonna be okay," but you heard the breathlessness in her voice as she held you close and away from the unpredictable helicopter in the middle of your flower field.

The door to the jet slid open and revealed a group of ruffed up, exhausted Avengers. The whole pack was there from first glance: Tony, Steve, Clint, Fury, Maria, Thor, Bruce, but no- oh there's Natasha. You and Laura exhaled at the same time, half walking and half skipping to Natasha and Clint. Finally, landing in her arms again. Her hold was tender but tight, tighter than ever as she closed her tired eyes and breathed in your scent and held the back of your head. The team gawked at you and Laura like alien specimens in your lovers arms.

"I'm just gonna say it- who the hell are you two?" Of course, Tony was the one to break the sweet moment.

Natasha let out a mix of a sigh and a chuckle, before sharing a glance with Clint. "This, Tony, is my wife Y/N. Y/N  - the Avengers, Avengers - Y/N. There, the formalities are over."  Clint soon did the same with Laura.

The sound of leather could be heard crunching as Fury walked toward you and Laura, embracing you two too hard, nearly making you cough. You gently reached up to give him a hug, "Nice to see you too Nick." 

"HOW DO THESE TWO KNOW NICK?" Poor Bruce, he looked like he was trying to solve a math problem.

"We're agents with Shield, dipshit. I'm just on leave due to-," you gestured down to your visible pregnant belly, "and the fact that Nick is my boss so technically I have to listen to him. But Laura and I have actually known all of you for years, which is how we met Clint and Natasha...unfortunately."  You chuckled when Nat lightly shoved your arm.

Good ol' Steve Rogers was the first to stick out his arm, "It’s a pleasure, Miss." His grip was firm, but not too hard. You smiled up at him kindly, "Nice to meet you too, Rogers. And call me Y/N, are you boys hungry?"

A few hours later you were in the kitchen, freshly showered and bandaged Avengers sitting at your dining room table, causing a ruckus and playing poker. You loved the sound of a full house and conversations mixing together to make one babble of laughing, foul mouthed heroes. It was music to your ears.

A gentle figure hugged you from behind while you were over the sink, placing their soft hands on your belly, you closed your eyes for a second and sighed happily.

“Missed me much sweetheart?” 

“You know I did,” you craned your neck to give her a gentle kiss on the temple.

That night, as the worlds mightiest slept in your spare bunks and sleeping bags, you fell asleep safe and sound with Natasha’s arm around you and your baby-to-be.

#natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff fluff #natasha romanoff angst #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff blurb #natasha romanoff au #natasha romanoff x female #natasha romanoff x fem!reader

[lexhndrx]

- history | stiles stilinski

tw; dry humping, sub stiles, praise kink

for; @godjustkys !

stiles stilinski was like a magnet; full of positivity, humor, and intelligence that won you over immediately. it was no secret that you were attracted to stiles, you made it known to him and others how you felt about him however, he remained frustratingly indifferent to your advances.

a partner project was your savior, bringing the both of you together. you couldn’t help but feel almost electric at the prospect of being able to work with stiles, and possibly getting closer as peers as well.

meeting at stiles’ place to work on the assignment; working earnestly at first. papers splayed out on his bedroom floor while the both of you marked and edited. as the evening progressed, tension heightened and you found yourself getting bolder as the project preceded. the both of you were in close proximity already, but by the end of the night you and stiles were practically touching.

“why are you looking at me like that?” he asks without looking up, feeling your stare as he put the finishing touches on the project. “no reason, you’re just cute when you’re focused.” you murmur, and stiles pauses for a second and looks toward you. “you can stop joking with me, i know you don’t mean it.” he says, avoiding your eyes and fiddling with the papers in his hand. “i wouldn’t say it if i didn’t, stiles.” you said softly, and he finally meets your gaze.

the room feels as though it’s getting warmer, and suddenly the distance between you stiles doesn’t feel that far. “may i kiss you?” you ask, voice no louder than a whisper. “yes.” his voice strains and the both of you close the distance. stiles’ lips meld with yours and move in near perfect sync. the last remnants of his resolve crumbles and he melts into you fully. the tension reaches its peak as your hands make their way to stiles’ waist.

he all but crawls into your lap, perching himself on your thigh while he allows your to take control over the deepened kiss. he grinds down, seemingly out of pure habit. “‘m sorry,” he says, pulling away from the kiss. he’s breathing heavy, his lips are puffy and slicked with spit and his hair is so messy. “are you-“ you couldn’t finish your sentence before he nods, albeit embarrassedly.

you grin, using the grip you had on his hips to push him down along your thigh again. “keep doing it,” you whisper, kissing along his jaw and down his neck. he gasps, following your order and rolling his hips down once more. he grinds down in your leg unabashedly now, whimpering while you assist him. you suck a mark into in shoulder, one easy to cover up that should serve as a memory of this might.

stiles looks so desperate, all messy and disheveled as he humps your thigh. his head is tilted back away from you, and you’re absorbed in how utter sinful he looks in his attempts to be get off using your thigh.

“just look at you… beautiful,” you voice, your hands moving up to rub at his skin underneath his shirt. he only whines at the comment, looking down at you and moving faster at the praise. “oh? you’re probably so close, are you sweet thing?” comes your teasing and slightly condescending tone. “so close,” he whimpers, head falling into the crook of your neck as his body trembles with light little shocks of pleasure.

“i want you to cum, go on love. make a mess for me,” you voice, dragging your hands up and down his sides and moving your thigh in time with his scattered movements. he gasps, a loud, sudden sound and then he lets out some of the prettiest moans you’d ever heard. high pitched and needy as he makes a mess of his own underwear, right there on your thigh. you coo, holding him in your arms and praising him as he comes down.

#dom male reader #top male reader #dom reader #top reader #sub stiles #sub stiles stilinski #stiles stilinski x male reader #stiles x reader #stiles x male reader #stiles stilinski x reader

[minkyungseokie]

第三章 | First Day of Work

warnings; age gap love(R: 23, S:39, T: 50), untranslated Korean, untranslated Chinese

note; chapter three!! I might be falling out of love with the sport ngl. After this, I might take a long break

note2; please feel free to request moodboards, blurbs, smaus, or anything else you want for this series. Or just request anything as long as you read my rules and how to request thing

fc; imleslie(Y/n), xavier serrano(Aaron Antognelli), blanca soler(Chiara Lorenzi)

Come Talk to Me

Driven by Destiny Masterlist | Previous | Next

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I do not give anyone permission to change, copy, or put my work on any other platform. It will only be on top, so if you see it, please report it. Or let me know.

DO NOT ask me to update this story. I'll update this when I can.

An arm reached out from under the mound of blankets and practically slapped the phone off the table as the alarm pierced through the quiet and comfortable atmosphere, "Ugh.." Y/n groaned, retracting her arm and cuddling into her pillow. Just as she was about to fall back to sleep, the familiar sound of her ringtone rang through the air, "God fucking dammit." Y/n cursed, throwing the blanket off of her body and grabbing her phone.

Y/n put the phone on speaker and threw her legs over the side of the bed, "What?" She barked, "Woah, why so hostile? You told me to call you to ensure you woke up." The voice of Y/n's sister, Jisue, or Rachel, said. Y/n sighed and picked up her phone, unplugging it from the wall before walking to the bathroom, "Yeah, I remember. Sorry, I just...didn't sleep very well last night." Y/n groaned, running a hand through her hair as she searched through her drawers for an outfit.

"It's fine. You forget that I'm your older sister. It isn't my first time dealing with you when you're like this. Do you know what you're going to wear?" Rachel questioned, "Nah, I'm completely clueless, mate. You wanna hop on FaceTime and help me pick an outfit?' Y/n asked, grabbing her phone and waiting for her sister to answer.

"Duh. You know I would love to help you out. Say, I'm at Mum and Dad's right now, so I can get Olivia to help as well if you want." Rachel suggested. Y/n gasped, "Yes! Yes, go get her!" Y/n encouraged. She loved all of her siblings the same amount and Y/n refused to treat one better than the other two, but Olivia was the baby of the family, everyone had a soft spot for the girl.

She was an absolute sweetheart, as all of the Lee siblings were. "Okay, hold on. She'd love to help since you're probably her favourite sibling." Rachel joked, Y/n scoffed playfully and rolled her eyes, "Oli doesn't have a favourite sibling. If she did, it'd be Felix."

Rachel quickly got up and went to go get Olivia while Y/n pulled out some options to wear otherwise they would be there all day going through her clothes.

Thudding was heard on the other end of the phone and the thump of someone landing on the soft bed the phone must've been on. "Y/N!!" Olivia greeted cheerfully, "Oliva!" Y/n copied her enthusiasm. "Olivia, be careful with my phone." Rachel hissed, plopping down on the bed next to her youngest sister, "Oh shush, Rachel. I was being careful. Anyway, I'm going to FaceTime you now." Olivia directed her attention to Y/n.

The older Australian waited until the screen for the call popped up and immediately hit answer, "G'day, my lovely sisters." Y/n greeted again, waving with both hands. Olivia was lying on the bed with her feet up in the air, swinging back and forth while Rachel sat behind her.

"Hello! Show us what you have already." Olivia said, getting into a better position, "Move over, Olivia." Rachel ordered, getting on the bed and pushing the youngest Lee sibling over gently. "Okay, keep in mind that I want to make a good impression on my boss." Y/n reminded, putting the shirts over her arm so she could get ready to show them off.

Y/n looked at her phone to see both of her sisters giving her looks of suspicion, "What?" Y/n asked, "Since when did you care about giving off good impressions?" She asked, narrowing her eyes at the younger woman, "Yeah, you usually don't care unless..." Olivia let out a loud gasp, "You're...are..Y/n! Do you want to attract your boss?! Is he or she attractive?! What's their name? I'm going to look them up."

"Woah, woah, woah, Olivia. Calm Down. What are you getting at?" Rachel asked, putting a hand on their sister's shoulder, who was vibrating in place as she grabbed Rachel's laptop. "You weren't around when this happened, but every time Y/n put more effort into her appearance, she found the boss super attractive," Olivia explained.

"Is this true, Y/n? Do you find your boss attractive?" Rachel questioned with a teasing smile growing on her face, Y/n looked to the side as her cheeks gained a hue, "Maybe, but it doesn't matter. She's married and way out of my league. Anyway. here are my shirt options." Y/n brushed off the topic and showed off each of the shirts.

"Hmm, personally I like option number three the most. I think go with the black button down. You look amazing in black." Olivia said, "I agree, black is a part of your aesthetic." Rachel agreed.

Y/n took off her pyjama shirt and threw it onto the bed just as she got another call, "Who's calling you?" Olivia asked, "Yongbok. I'm going to add him to the FaceTime call." Y/n said, picking up her phone again and sending a text to her younger brother.

After the text was sent, it didn't take too long for Felix to join the call just as Y/n was propping the phone up, "Hello. Why are you shirtless?" Felix asked as his face popped up on the screen.

A face popped up over Felix's shoulder and stared at Y/n with wide eyes and rosy cheeks, "I was getting dressed for my first day at work. Hey, Hannie." Y/n greeted, waving at the wide-eyed quokka.

The chubby-faced boy waved back, "안녕하세요, 누나." Jisung greeted, "지성아, 말해봐요. 이 셔츠 마음에 들어요? 아니면 다른 걸로 갈까요?" Y/n asked, holding up the black button-down. "Black..is good. I like black." Jisung answered, giving the girl a thumbs up.

Y/n unbuttoned the shirt and threw it on, "너도 도와줄 거야, 하니?" Y/n questioned, seeing the younger man was still there, "네, 괜찮으시다면." Jisung answered.

"Next up are the pants. Show us what you got." Felix said, "Yeah, I'm ready to see what you have for pants." Olivia spoke, "Knowing her they are all going to be high-waisted pants that are either in black or that weird tan-beige colour." Rachel joked.

Rachel looked at Y/n, who was now standing frozen with a guilty look on her face, "Y/n, you do have jeans in more than one style and two colours, right?" Rachel asked. Y/n pursed her lips and picked up two pairs of shoes, "So what shoes should I go for?" She asked, changing the subject

"I like the platform Doc Martins." Felix said, "I like the boots." Rachel said, pointing to the Doc Martin boots that Y/n held in her other hand/ "I like the platforms." Olivia said, "I like..boots as well." Han spoke.

"So we have two for the boots and two for the platforms. Hey, Olivia, go get mum and ask for her opinion." Y/n ordered. Olivia rolled her eyes but went to go get their mother as requested, "Mum!" Olivia called out as she jogged to wherever their mother was located in the house.

"So how are things in Monaco?" Felix asked, "Oh, Monaco is amazing so far. I've only been to a few places which were the market, my new home, a cafe to meet my new boss, and that's about it." Y/n shrugged.

"Speaking of her new boss. Y/n might have a little crush on her married boss." Rachel told Felix, "Rachel! Lixie, don't listen to her. I don't have a crush on Mrs. Wolff. I do think she's gorgeous, but nothing would ever come of it if I did want to be more than friends, or more than boss and PA, with her." Y/n rolled her eyes.

"I don't think it means anything. You know how Y/n is. She finds people attractive, but she's too scared...sorry, shy, to do anything about her attraction." Felix said.

"Hey!"

"I'm back with Mum!" Olivia announced, running into the room and diving onto the bed. Sure enough, after a couple of seconds, the Lee sibling's mother enters the room and sits down, "Hello, Mum!" Y/n greeted the beautiful woman.

"Hello, sweetheart. I just want to let you know that I'm proud of you for finding such a good job." Mrs. Lee said sweetly, wishing she could hug her child and run her hands through her hair.

"Thank you, mam. I'll be right back." Y/n said, grabbing her clothes before stepping out of the frame. Mrs. Lee got up and exited the room since she was no longer needed, "Do you guys really think Y/n isn't interested in the boss lady?" Olivia asked in a low voice.

"I am not sure, honestly." Rachel admitted, "Y/n 누나는 쉽게 사랑에 빠지는 타입이 아닙니다." Han spoke up, "You're right. She really isn't the type to fall in love easily and she definitely isn't someone who is into homewrecking." Felix agreed.

Rachel opened her mouth to say something, but the sound of rustling clothes getting closer made her snap her jaw shut as quickly as she opened it.

"Okay, how do I look?" Y/n asked, giving the group a 360 view of her outfit. "You look amazing as always." Rachel complimented, "As pretty as always." Felix added, "Unbutton a few of those buttons. You look like a fuc- ahem a nerd." Olivia said.

"N/n, I'm being so serious about this when I ask and I don't want you to think I'm accusing you of anything, but..." Felix trailed off, unsure as to how to phrase the question.

"You usually wear more masculine or androgynous clothing, but all of a sudden you're being really feminine," Olivia spoke up. 

Y/n nearly reeled back in shock. She wasn't doing much of anything other than getting dressed and ready for her first day at work, which she had to get to in an hour. "I'm not sure if I follow what you're trying to say." Y/n narrowed her eyes.

"I'm just saying that maybe you're much more attracted to that woman who hired you than you thought and maybe you're unconsciously changing things about yourself to appeal to her." Rachel shrugged.

Y/n stared at her family with wide eyes. She didn't know why they were accusing her of being into her boss, but it made her want to rip her cochlear out of her head, but it wasn't that serious.

Y/n didn't understand why they would think that. Y/n hated things like that.

Love at first sight.

To her, it wasn't real and never existed. How are you going to fall in love with someone based on nothing but their looks? It's shallow and it's also how people end up in bad relationships since someone could be the most handsome man or woman you had ever met and simultaneously be the shittiest person alive.

To Y/n, being accused of being so attracted to Susie without her properly knowing the woman made Y/n feel like they saw her as shallow and superficial.

To Y/n, being accused of trying to dress to attract a woman with a family meant calling her a homewrecker.

Y/n didn't associate with people like that or live by the love at first sight thing because beauty will fade, but one's character will not.

"You guys know damn well that I'm not like that." Y/n hissed, "Y/n, we don't mean it like that--" Rachel started.

"No, you do mean it like that. I dress for myself and my success, not to attract an already-married woman. What kind of person do you think I am? I told you that she's married. I told you that she has a family." Y/n interrupted.

"Y/nnie..." Han called out, "I'm sorry, but I don't want to talk to any of you right now." Y/n huffed, pressing the 'end call' button. 

The Chinese Australian dusted the imaginary dust off of her outfit and finished getting ready. She grabbed her glasses and put them on before putting her hair in a half up half down style.

Y/n grabbed a belt and wrapped it around her waist, making sure she didn't miss any of the belt loops before grabbing her backpack and the keys to the BMW Series 3 she had rented.

⋘ 𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑎... ⋙⋘ 𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑎... ⋙

Y/n sat in the car with her hands on the wheel and her eyes closed, she felt bad for assuming what her sisters had meant by what they had said. She also felt really bad for getting so upset with them and she didn't even know why she was so upset by it.

Yes, she was willing to admit that Susie Wolff was an absolutely gorgeous woman, but to say that she was changing herself in order to attract the older woman was blasphemous to her.

Y/n input the address into her phone and followed the directions to a makeshift office that Susie used while In Monaco. The Headquarters was in London and Susie had a son to raise, so she couldn't be in London all the time like she wanted to be.

"Wait, does this mean I'm going to have to travel all over the world? I know that I have an expensive apartment and rent this expensive car, but I'm not rich. This job better pay me enough." Y/n muttered.

Y/n stopped in front of the makeshift office and exited the car with her bag in hand, shoving her keys into the bag as she walked up to the front door. As she stared at the building, her stomach did flips, she hated starting a new job.

Starting a new place of work always made her feel like her stomach was flipping so hard that it'd fall out of her ass. Taking a deep breath and gripping the straps of her bag, Y/n muttered encouragements to herself, "来吧, Y/n。别这么娘娘腔 男人......呃......女人，快滚进大楼" 

After cursing at herself in Chinese, Y/n finally opened the door and stepped inside. "Hello, how may I help you?" The receptionist asked with a sweet smile on her face, "Um, I'm here to see Mrs. Susie Wolff. I am her new PA." Y/n explained, wiping her clammy hands on her pants.

The receptionist typed a few things before picking up her phone and calling someone. After a few minutes, the woman looked up at her again, "Okay, you can go sit and Mrs. Wollf will be with you shortly." 

Y/n nodded and turned to go sit in the lobby. The girl sat down and looked around, studying the lobby of the building. This must be where Susie works when her husband is busy doing whatever it is he does and she wants to be around her son.

"Alright, have a wonderful day. Be a good boy for Jessi, okay?" Y/n turned at the sound of Susie's voice to see her kneeling down with her hands on a little blonde boy's shoulders. The little boy nodded and wrapped his arms around Susie's neck.

Y/n and Susie watched as another woman, whom Y/n admittedly didn't notice at first, picked the young boy up and walked out of the building. Y/n continued to watch the duo leave, not noticing Susie turn to her with a smile.

"Ms. Lee? Ms. Lee?" Susie called out before putting a hand on Y/n's shoulder. Y/n jumped up in surprise and whipped around, "妈的! Oh, Mrs. Wolff. I apologise. I didn't see you walking up to me." Y/n breathed, putting a hand over her heart as if it would stop the racing.

"Did I scare you? I'm sorry." Susie apologised with a chuckle, "It's fine. Anyway, good morning to you, Mrs. Wolff. How was your morning so far?" Y/n questioned, standing up.

"Oh, it was okay. It's been a long and busy one. How about you? How was your morning so far?" Susie asked, "It was a morning. I woke up, got dressed, and drove here." Y/n answered.

Susie gestured for Y/n to follow her, "That's certainly a way to start the morning. Are you hungry?" Susie questioned, Y/n opened her mouth to answer but was interrupted by her stomach growling.

It wasn't as loud as books and stories make it out to be, but when in a huge, silent, echoey hallway where things seemed much more audible than they really were...

Y/n's jaw dropped and her hands pressed against her stomach as if that would stop the growling. "I guess that answers my question." Susie chuckled, "We don't have food in the office, but I was planning on revisiting that cafe we went to last time. It's a tad bit stuffy in the office anyway."

Sussie led the younger woman out of the building, "Do you want to ride with me or are you fine taking your car?" Susie questioned. 

Y/n wanted to take the rental car, but she also wanted to ride with Susie. It would be nice to get to know her boss better, but at the same time, Y/n didn't know if it was appropriate to do so.

But wait.

She's a PA, which means she should be nearby at all times during work hours, right? With a nod, Y/n walked up to the passenger side door and put her hand on the handle, "I hope you don't mind if I ride with you." 

Susie waved her in, "No problem. Come on in." She said. Y/n opened the door to the Mercedes and slid into the passenger seat. 

Y/n looked around the interior with a look of awe. She had never been in such a luxury car. She rented the BMW, but it was at a discounted price and even that price was much more than she could afford.

"You like the car?" Susie questioned, looking at Y/n inspecting the interior of the car, "Yeah, it's much nicer than any other car I've been in. When I make enough money, I'm going to get one. A Mercedes, I mean." Y/n answered.

"Is your current car not good enough?" Susie asked, reversing as Y/n buckled up, "No, that's not my car. I rented it and I have to return it soon. I don't have enough money to get one at the moment. Spent all of my money on my expensive apartment." Y/n sighed.

Susie's smile faded as she processed what Y/n had said, while Y/n herself was practically kicking herself. 

Why would she just tell her business to her new boss like that?

"Y/n, do you have enough money for food?" Susie asked but got no answer, which was enough of an answer for her. 

Susie cleared her throat, "Moving on, I'm going to need you to fill out some stuff when we get to the cafe. I forgot to bring it with me last time." Susie changed the subject.

"Of course. I'm excited to go to the cafe again. They had delicious pastries. Have you tried their normal menu?" Y/n asked, gratefully accepting the topic switch.

She didn't need to or want to, seem like she wasn't in a good place. She wasn't, but she wasn't going to tell her new employer that she had spent so much on her apartment, the car, and buying her first set of groceries, that she had no more money.

Which was a huge reason as to why she got this job in the first place. She was a wannabe model whose life went to shit as soon as she tried to be a model. If it weren't for her parents and Felix, she'd...

Y/n shook her head. She didn't want to think about what would've become of her if they hadn't lent her enough money to pay her bills. 

In a way, they were also the only reason she was able to make it to Monaco. 

Susie looked at her new assistant out of the side of her eye. She had been talking to her, but she could tell Y/n's attention wasn't on her.

Her face was blank, but her body said that she wasn't happy with what was going through her head. Susie parked the car in the lot of the cafe in which they first officially met and turned the car off.

She studied the half-Australian before reaching out, pulling her hand back in hesitation before fully reaching out and placing her hand on top of Y/n's clenched one.

Y/n nearly jumped out of her skin when Susie's smooth hand covered hers, the touch was cool yet sent sparks of heat in her stomach. Y/n looked up at the much older woman with wide eyes, "Sorry ma'am, did you--?"

"Are you okay? Truthfully, are you okay?" Susie questioned, Y/n nodded her head, putting her free hand over Susie's, "I'm fine. I was just deep in thought. We should go in." Y/n said, pulling her hands away and exiting the car.

Susie let out a sigh and followed Y/n. It wasn't her place to push the girl, but as her employer and more importantly a mother, she couldn't help but want to understand more about what was upsetting her.

She wanted to help the younger woman as much as she could. But first, it seemed she had to gain her trust.

⋘ 𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑎... ⋙⋘ 𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑎... ⋙

The two women now sat at a two-person table on the patio with menus in their hands and a silence between them. It was the type of silence that was not uncomfortable nor was it comfortable. 

It was the type of silence one could enjoy for a long time without feeling awkward, but it wasn't the type of silence that was comfortable.

Y/n didn't know how to describe it in any other way than that.

The dark-haired half-Aussie looked up when she heard Susie clear her throat gently, "Uh, do you know what you want yet? The stuff we got last time was pretty good, so I might take some home for my family." Susie said, continuing to look at the options for food.

"Uh, yeah. I think I know what I want, but I don't know if it's any good. It's the Brioche au Homrd façon Riviera. What about you?" Y/n asked, Susie showed Y/n the menu and pointed at which one she wanted, "Ah, the Croque Monsieur à la Truffe. It sounds delicious. Oh, here comes the waitress." Y/n noted, politely waving over to the waitress.

As the waitress walked over, Susie's phone began to ring, "Shoot, I have to take this. Do you mind ordering for me?" Susie asked, grabbing her phone from her purse.

"Go on, Mrs. Wolff. I'll order for you." Y/n smiled before turning to the waitress.

Susie walked outside the cafe and stood by the car, "Hello?" Susie answered, "Hello, liebling." The gruff voice of her husband greeted sweetly.

"How are things going in Sakhir?" Susie asked, "Things are going great. The car is looking wonderful and I'm really confident this season. How are things going with your new intern?" Toto questioned.

"She's my personal assistant, Toto. And she's wonderful so far. A really beautiful and sweet girl that I think will make a wonderful personal assistant." Susie said. Toto could hear that she wanted to say something, but didn't want to continue and, knowing her, whatever it was was eating at her.

"And what is the problem?" Toto questioned, "I..." Susie hesitated. She wanted to help Y/n because she knew that the woman would end up in a really bad situation. She'd earn €33,965 per year or €2,684.85 per month and, as much as it seemed, it would only pay for her rent. 

It wouldn't be enough for her to fully live off of and Susie wished she could raise the amount she had to pay, but she wasn't legally allowed to.

But it also wasn't any of her business, so she just shook her head, "Nothing. Nothing at all." Susie sighed.

After about a twenty-minute conversation with her husband, Susie hung up and made her way back to the restaurant. "I'm back. Sorry for keeping you." Susie apologised, pulling out the chair and sitting down.

"It's fine, Mrs. Wolff. The food just got here anyway." Y/n said, placing the food Susie ordered in front of her. 

"Okay, so while we eat, I'm going to have you sign some documents that I forgot to have you sign and I'll explain what you'll be doing," Susie said, opening up her purse and pulling out some papers.

Y/n, who had begun cutting her lobster roll in half, looked up at the sound of the paper being placed in front of her. Her hands were a bit messy, so she extended her pinky and used it to drag the documents over to her side where she could see better.

After looking it over, Y/n grabbed her napkin and wiped off her hands before grabbing a pen that Susie offered, "Thanks," Y/n muttered.

"So as my personal assistant you will help me with managing schedules, communicating, taking notes, planning, organizing, preparing, and reminding." Susie explained, picking up a half of her sandwich.

Y/n looked up from the paperwork she was doing and looked at Susie with confusion written all over her freckled face.

 "I know I didn't explain it well. You will basically be helping me schedule meetings, appointments, and events. You'll help me answer phone calls, emails, and any inquiries. You will be taking meeting minutes and transcribing from dictation, planning travel, including flights, accommodations, and transportation, organizing events and conferences, preparing reports, presentations, and briefs, and reminding their manager of important tasks and deadlines." Susie said.

Y/n put her pen down and nodded her head, "I know it sound like a lot to do alone, but you won't be doing git alone. We'll be working together. The only thing that you'll probably be doing alone is running errands for me when I'm busy." Susie reassured, biting into her sandwich.

"Oh, I understand. Doesn't sound too difficult to do." Y/n spoke, picking up her roll and taking a big bite. Y/n hummed in satisfaction as the flavours of her food hit her tongue, "This is really good." The woman muttered.

"I've never had food from here either, but I'm really enjoying this." Susie agreed.

"So, Mrs. Wolff, how long have you been in motorsports?" Y/n asked, "Well, I started out as a driver and then I decided I'd  help little girls achieve their dreams of becoming F1 drivers themselves. What about you? I read that you used to be a really talented driver before quitting." Susie noted.

"I was close to becoming an F1 driver, but I contracted menegitis and I lost my hearing, so I couldn't compete anymore. Also, I couldn't get any sponsors despite being "talented"" Y/n said, putting air quotes around talented.

"I've watched some of your old races and I think you would've made it pretty far in F1." Susie complimented, wiping her hands and mouth.

"Thank you, Mrs. Wolff." Y/n thanked bashfully.

"Please, call me Susie. We'll be working close together from now on." Susie gave Y/n a smile and, once again, the girl couldn't help but notice how beautiful her smile was.

The two had settled into a comfortable silence where the only sounds that were heard was the ambiance of the cafe with the patrons chattering, utensils clinking against plates, and the sound of the kitchen workers making food and drink in the back.

Susie finished her food and wiped her hands and mouth again, leaning against the table and watching Y/n finish up her own food. 

"Say, Y/n," Susie called to grab her attention. Y/n looked up and tilted her head curiously, "If you had the chance, would you become a driver again?"

Y/n froze. Driving again had always been a sensitive topic to her. She wanted to drive again. She wanted to feel the wheel under her hands, a helmet on her head, and the seat that's fitted perfectly for her.

She wanted to be a driver more than she wanted to model, but she knew she could never do it again. The inside of her ears didn't work, which means she couldn't hear any radio messages.

Unless there was a way they could help her hear without using the ear pieces, it was impossible and Y/n told her just that.

"I would if I could. But with me being unable to hear normally, there's just no way. I have to wear headphones that cover my cochlear and hearing aid or else I wouldn't be able to hear anything." Y/n explained.

Susie nodded in understanding, thinking about something before deciding to discuss it with her husband later.

"Okay, well, back to business. The F1 Academy won't be announced until November, but we have a lot of things to do before it opens. Are you ready?" Susie asked.

"I am."

↳ ❝ [Taglist] ¡!❞

@lewisvinga @only-nope @goldenmoonbeam @victorharrington @cheyxfu @xoscar03 @sunnylikesfrogs @laur2608 @evie-119 @alliwantisadonut @exotic-iris13 @thewolffswife

#f1 fic #driven by destiny series #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 fanfic #f1 x you #toto wolff imagine #toto x reader x susie #toto wolff smut #toto wolff x reader #toto wolff fanfic #susie wolff x reader #jack wolff #formula 1 x reader #formula 1 fanfic #formula 1 fics #formula one fanfiction #formula one fanfic #f1 smut #f1 one shot #f1 fluff #f1 social media au #f1 grid x reader #f1 x female reader #formula one imagines #formula one imagine #formula one fic #formula one x reader #formula one x you

[aenokiawrld]

★ 𝔟𝔞𝔡 𝔡𝔢𝔠𝔦𝔰𝔦𝔬𝔫𝔰 ☆

boy, you make me make bad decisions…

a/n: first smut buds (it might be bad) i’ll be using female anatomy cause im still tryna figure out how to write for male anatomy. also sorry for the wait, i was busy graduating!

♡︎༺☆༻♡︎

─── ⋆⋅ ♰ ⋅⋆ ───

18+ !! MINORS DNI

─── ⋆⋅ ♰ ⋅⋆ ───

cw: i gooned to this fic, unprotected sex, p in v sex, reader has some type of boobies, luffy a lil goofy during sex, sub!reader x softdom!luffy (?), no spoiler (no set arc), luffy is a genuinely nice dude, slight pet names: muffin, cutie

tags ✮⋆˙ enemies to lovers, afab!reader, luffy x marine!reader, post timeskip, no specific body type :), no set arc - no spoilers

now playing: bad decisions - ariana grande

“This is all your fault!”

“Aw, come on! It’s not that bad!”

“Not bad? NOT BAD?! Do you understand how embarrassing it is for me to be stuck with a degenerate pirate?!”

You grumbled, “Not only that, your loud mouth for us caught by those rowdy pirates.”

The rubber boy laughed at your statement, “Lighten up a little, muffin! My crew will rescue us soon!”

“Oh my god, General Garp is gonna be so pissed with me. He might kick me out for conspiring with a pirate and all my hard work will be down the drain,” You mutter to yourself as you bury your face into your knees.

“Oh yea, he’s my grandpa!” He snickered at your muttering.

“…I DON’T CARE, GO BACK TO SITTING IN YOUR CORNER LIKE I TOLD YOU EARLIER!”

He pouted, “Aw come on, muffin, we’re gonna be stuck in here for awhile so we might as well get to know each other for a bit.”

“Stop calling me muffin!”

“But… muf- OW HEY!”

You punched him hard enough to send him flying to the wall. You felt a vein about to burst on your forehead, “Call me that again and I’ll stuff sea stone prism down your throat! Actually, don’t refer to me at all, I would rather die than have a low life pirate speak my name.” The sound of your sea prism stone chains echoed in the cell as you crossed your arms.

“But I’m curious, why do you call me muffin?”

“Huh? Oh! Cause I thought you were cute when I first saw you!” He flashed a cheeky smile as he looked your way.

Your eyes widened as you heard his statement. How could he say that so casually?! And to a marine too! You couldn’t lie when you felt a bit pleased hearing the rubber pirate call you cute…but even so, the boy is still a pirate and you were taught that pirates were degenerates since you were a kid.

You slapped your flushed cheeks before turning towards him, “Yeah, I already know that buddy.”

“Then, why are you blush-”

“Oh my god, is that a plate of meat over there?” You attempted to distract him from

Luffy’s attention immediately changes gears, “WHERE?!!”

You watched in disbelief as the pirate sniffed the floor like a bloodhound looking for the imaginary “meat.”

“Hey! You lied to me! There isn’t any meat in here!”

“Are you actually this fucking dumb?”

“Nuh uh, Nami says I’m just mentally challenged!”

You facepalmed, “Are we seriously around the same age? Because you sound like you’ve never stepped foot in an educational institute AT ALL.”

“What?! No…maybe you’re right…but I’m smart in a way!”

“You look like you don’t know how to read a Dr. Seuss book in your life.”

“Why would I care for doctor seuss? I already have Chopper for that!”

“He’s not an actual doc- OK, you know what? Think whatever you like,” you frustratedly pinched the bridge of your nose from the rubber boy’s stupidity.

“Look, Luffy, don’t try get all buddy-buddy with me just because we’re stuck in the same cell.”

He pouted, “Aw come on, lighten up a lil! We’re stuck together so we might as well make the best of it.”

You sighed before laying your head on the palm of your hand, “Well, pirates and marines don’t really mix, bud. You’re just gonna waste your time as well as mine.”

He laughed, “Well you called me ‘bud’ so i’m gonna assume we can still be friends. I have a friend who is a marine.”

You laughed at his outrageous statement, “Your friend….a marine? That’s gotta be one of your funniest jokes.”

He pouted, “No, i’m serious! His name is Koby!”

Your laughter came to a halt hearing the familiar name, “Koby…KOBY?! We both work under Vice Admiral Garp!”

“Oh yeah, we go way back. Ask him and he’ll know!” The rubber boy laughed.

“Aha…no.”

“Hey! I’m telling the truth, ya know,” he pouted.

“Right, and I’m Optimus Prime.”

“YOU ARE??”

“NO?? WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!”

His jaw practically dropped to the floor, “You almost got me there I can’t lie.”

You facepalmed at his stupidity. It was unbelievable that someone this stupid existed in your eyes. You wanted to stretch his stupid face and throw him against the wall so bad.

“So, Muffin, you got a boyfriend?”

You looked at him confused with a dangerous red tint forming on your cheeks, “Wha- no! I mean, it’s not really a priority for me…”

“And stop calling me muffin! I have a name and it’s [name]!”

“Well, I don’t feel like calling you that…Can I just call you cutie?” The rubber boy laughed at his own comment.

“Don’t you dare-”

“Come on, [name]…I wasn’t lying when I said I think you’re really cuteeee!” His voice became more flirty yet playful.

The proximity between you too had become tight and close. Your arms were practically touching the more Luffy scooted towards you. Your cheeks started to become warm.

“Luffy, that’a enou-”

“Come on, Muffin. I really wanna know you more. I don’t care if you’re a marine, you’re really….attractive.”

“C-come on now, do you really wanna do thi-”

He got closer to your face with a devilish smirk, “[Name], I’m fine with it if you’re fine with it…Because I think we both know the answer to that.”

“Luffy…This is so inappropriate! What if we get caught,” you yell in a hushed tone.

“Oh, so you’re up for it,” he wiggles his brows.

You really wanted to hate him so badly, yet, the feeling between your legs started to ache for pleasure. The way his breath hit your face when he talks to you sensually wasn’t helping either. Maybe, it wouldn’t hurt being on Santa’s naughty list just for this moment.

“Fuck, i’m so getting fired for this…”

———

“Shh, if you keep making those noises, they might hear us.”

Your cries of pleasure were muffled into your hand as you he increased the speed of his fingers abusing your needy pearl. The feeling of his growing bulge only fueled your drive for more as it intensified the heat growing inside your stomach.

“Lu- hah..Luffy, no more!”

“Muffin…we all know you want the opposite,” he bit the lobe of your ear.

“Fu…uck, If you keep doing this I might-“

“Do it, cause I still got more things I wanna do with you,” he smirked into your ear.

You yelped as you felt two fingers insert into your sopping hole, the electricity in your body shocking down your spine. Luffy loved the way your body reacted to his fingers gliding along your gummy walls.

You moaned into your hand, “Luffy!”

“Come on, Muffin, how about you cum for me?” That same devilish smirk was painted on his face again.

“In your dreams, Strawhat.”

He halted his action, “Then, I won’t continue.”

You opened your eyes before looking at him with pleading eyes, “No- wait, please.”

He looked at you with sultry eyes while keeping that stupid smirk, “Say that for me again, Muffin.”

With tears in your eyes, “please?”

Immediately after hearing those words, he swiftly shifted your body between his legs, leaving your face between his thighs. You gulped as you stared at the now prominent bulge in his jeans. Guess having rubber abilities has its perks outside of combat.

A moan escaped his mouth as you kissed his clothed crotch, leaving a wet stain on his washed jeans before zipping his fly down. Your hand trails along the slit of his boxers before freeing his cock.

His tip was a flushed red with a tan color that accented it as it leaked with pre cum, the sticky string of the milky substance connecting with your middle finger as you lightly touched it.

After a few moments of contemplation, you slowly fisted his twitching cock with your sea stone prism cuffed hand. His lewd moans and grunts echoing in your ear as you pleasured the straw hat captain with lust in your eyes.

With your salivated mouth, you slowly lowered your head onto his cock, struggling to reach to the base. The vibrations from your gagging sending shivers down his spine from the pleasure it sent to his balls.

“Shit…[Name], for someone who hates talking, you know how to put that mouth to use.” The rubber boy chuckled at your fucked out face.

You felt his hand guide the motion of your head as he fucked your mouth like a fleshlight, the thought of him using you like caused your hand to lower down your needy clit.

The rubber boy caught your hand before you could touch yourself as he guided them towards his sensitive balls, “If you squeeze here, it feels 10x better.” Again, giving that same lewd smirk.

You muffle a ‘mhmm’ to him before following his lead, your sight has become blurry from the tears accumulating from your ducts as you continued to take on his size.

“Ah…[Name], I can feel it coming. You don’t got to swallow if ya don’t want to.”

Just as he said that, you felt a warm thick liquid fill your mouth before you unlatched your mouth from his still erect cock. Your lips had become swollen and red.His flushed tip twitched as it continued pumping out hot cum, dripping onto the floor like candle wax.

You coughed up the lingering pale liquid from your mouth before gasping for air from the lack of access to your mouth airway. He noticed your discomfort before gently wiping the residue off your face and patting your back.

“Hey, you good?” a genuine caring tone resonating from his question.

You catch your breath, “Y-yeah, just not used to how…um…big it is.”

He inspected the look on your face before smiling, “Don’t hesitate to use the safe word if you’re uncomfortable. You remember it right?!”

You sighed, “Yes, it’s ‘meat.’”

“Atta girl,” a lewd smirk appearing on his face again.

“Now, how’s bout time you get on top again, Cutie,” he looked at you mischievously before signaling you on his lap.

You flutter your wet lashes before slowly moving on top of him, hovering over his hard cock still wet with hot cum. Your pussy was practically dripping in anticipation as his tip kissed your entrance. Before you could lower yourself on him, you felt your top and come undone, the buttoned shirt and black lacy bra falling down to the hard concrete floor. Your exposed nipples were nipped by the sudden chill of the air.

Luffy licked his lips at the sight of your breasts like a hungry hyena awaiting its prey. He started off slow as he collided his lips onto yours, reaching down to your neck, and slowly moving down towards your chest area as he latched onto one of your nipples.

Your pretty moans and whimpers were music to his ears as he desperately sucked the hardened nipples. He became obsessed with sucking the skin around your breast area as he left his dark purple marks around, you felt your mind go at ease knowing the marks will be out of sight from the other cadets.

“Luffy- shit…”

“Mmm’ i’m sorry, you just got some nice tits that’s all.”

If you weren’t blushing already, he would’ve definitely commented about your tomato-colored face. You lightly punch his shoulder before giggling at his silly comment.

“You’re weird you know that,” you giggled jokingly.

You swore you saw devil horns form on his head as he grabbed your hips and slowly lowered your desperate pussy onto his cock, causing you to let out a soft whine.

“A-ah!”

He quickly covered your mouth, “You’re so cute when you make those noises but we gotta be quiet if you don’t wanna whole show on us.”

“Ah, sorry, I’ll do my best.”

He gives you a reassuring smile before bucking his hips in a gentle manner as to not hurt you, his hands on your hips were still guiding you as to not disrupt the momentum.

You clawed at his chest as you felt your walls tighten around his girthy long cock, it felt nothing like the toys you secretly hid in your cabin. Your walls were still sensitive from the initial orgasm you had from Luffy fingering you earlier.

“Agh- faster, please.”

You smashed your lips onto his as you slipped your tongue inside, exploding the crevice of his mouth. Your hips switched to autopilot as the increase of your speed caused Luffy’s hands to lose momentum, letting you do most of the work.

You swallowed the moans that had escaped from his mouth as he matched the speed of his hips with yours. The room had echoed with the sound of squelching and moans as you humped eachother like rabbits in heat.

“Fuck, fuck, your pussy feels so good on my cock, [name].” His tongue still intertwined with yours. This was so much better than masturbating in his cabin after a long fight.

You felt your core tighten as you felt your gummy walls become violated from his large cock stretching you out. His tip kissing the nerves in your cervix as you let out cute whines into his mouth. God, it was just riling him up even more.

“Luffy, Luffy! Oh, fuck, i’m gonna cum!”

He pants into your ear, “Fuck, me too. You want it inside, Cutie?”

“Y-yes, fuck. I want your hot cum in me please, strawhat…”

Hearing the his nickname sent his cock twitching inside of you before spilling his seed inside your tender walls, causing your pussy to flutter from pleasure. The fucked our face he made was so sexy, it made your heart skip a beat then and there.

He moaned and whined as you rode out his now sensitive cock like a fuck toy before you felt your core tighten from your sensual release, white liquid dripping down your inner thighs before coating his cock even more.

You felt a bit embarrassed yet satisfied to get your pent up sexual energy flowing out. You collapsed on top of him as you both were attempting to catch your breaths, your faces adoring a bright red tint on your cheeks.

The angel on your shoulder is telling you this is wrong, yet, you couldn’t help but feel a bit…proud. Sure, you hated pirates and did anything to stand on that moral compass, but getting a good dick down by an attractive pirate? Who fucking cares?

“So, [name], did I change your opinion on pirates?”

A suggestive smirk appeared on your face,

“Maybe another round might change my mind…”

#fanfic #monkey d. luffy #one piece #smut #one piece smut #luffy x reader #luffy smut #cheese #straw hat luffy #straw hat pirates #oneshot

[alotofpockets]

Match commentary | Lucy Bronze x Arsenal!Reader

Where someone negatively comments on the match commentary you sent to your girlfriend every match

Woso masterlist | Words: 1.1k

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Y/n: That was such a good tackle!!

Y/n: Look at you working the flanks 

Y/n: You almost had her, just a step behind

Y/n: Nice safe, baby!!

Y/n: You get faster every time you play

Y/n: Haha cheeky little shirt grab there

Y/n: Pfft they should’ve gotten a yellow for taking you down like that!

“What are you doing?” Kyra asks as she sits down to you to roll out her muscles as well. You show her your split screen between the Barça game and your chat with Lucy. “I always text Lucy my match commentary when she plays.” 

Ever since the two of you went long distance with your relationship, when Lucy moved to Spain, you had watched her matches online. The only ones you missed were the ones that were at the same time as your own matches. Texting her throughout the match was something that had made you feel closer to your girlfriend. 

When she was still playing in the WSL you played for different teams as well, but you still got to go home to each other. Now, with Lucy in Barcelona and you in London with Arsenal, things were different, and this was how you dealt with the difference.

“That’s cute. Mind if I watch with you?” You propped your phone up so you could watch together, occasionally grabbing your phone to send Lucy a text. Always ending your commentary with:

Y/n: Well played, my love ❤️

A few matches and match commentaries later you were watching the Copa de la Reina final between Barça and Real Sociedad, with a few of your teammates. When you went to grab your phone for your first message to Lucy, Laia questioned you. “Are you going to text Lucy about the match?” You smile and show her the chat with Lucy already open on your phone. “Yeah, I always do. Why?” Laia hated to make you feel bad, but she felt like she had to share what she had heard her former teammates say about it. “Well, I just heard some of the Barça girls mention that Lucy’s phone is always full of messages from you after their matches, that she spends like 30 minutes going through them all in the dressing room.”

Your heart fell, were your messages annoying to your girlfriend? Why hadn’t she said anything to you if she did? “Oh, okay. Thank you for letting me know.”

Y/n: Good luck today! Give em hell out there ❤️

And with that message you put your phone back in your pocket and watch your girlfriend play without your usual commentary. Lucy and the rest of the team played amazingly, and managed to win with a final score of 8-0. When the match was finished you sent Lucy another text.

Y/n: Congrats on the win, you played amazing. So proud of you!

The first thing Lucy did when she entered the locker room with the rest of the girls, was grab her phone. Though her face fell when there were only two messages from you amongst her notifications. 

“What’s got you all frowny? We just won the Cup.” Frido noticed Lucy’s sudden mood change. “Oh, it’s nothing.” She raised her eyebrows, “Spill.” Lucy sighed, “You know how y/n usually sends me commentary on my matches?” With a nod of Frido’s head, Lucy continues. “Well she only sent me a good luck message when we started and a congrats message when we won, nothing in between.” 

“Maybe she was busy?” Lucy thinks for a moment. “Yeah, maybe, it’s just the first time she hasn’t done it besides her having a match of her own.” Frido puts her hand on Lucy’s shoulder. “I am sure that everything is fine. She still sent you those two messages, that has to mean something right? Just ask her later and come celebrate with us.”

Lucy decides to let herself believe Frido’s words and goes back on the pitch to receive the Cup and the medals with the team. 

When Lucy gets home that night she immediately facetimes you. Upon picking up, Lucy immediately starts talking. “Hi baby, busy day today?” You think for a second, had you told Lucy you were going to be having a busy day? You couldn’t have, right? Today’s schedule had never been filled, just a day off, and watching Lucy’s match. 

So, you shake your head, “Not really, I just had a nice relaxing day with some of the girls, and we watched your match. Speaking of your match, you played so well. Congratulations on another win this season, you all deserve it so much!” 

Hearing this is worrying Lucy more, maybe something was up after all. “Did I do something wrong?” Lucy questioned with a saddened look washed over her face. You furrow your brow, “No? Not that I know of at least.” You try to joke, hoping to lighten up the conversation. 

“Oh okay, that’s good I guess.” Lucy didn’t sound convinced so you questioned further. “Why, baby? What’s going on?”

“Well, usually you send me your match commentary when I play. When I didn’t get any today, I thought you might’ve been too busy to catch the match, but you just said you watched the match. Why didn’t you do them today? Did you not feel comfortable with the girls around? I thought you always did it with them around as well.”

You stop her rambling by starting to talk. “You missed the commentary?” Lucy nods instantly, “Yes, of course. Your commentary is the highlight of my post match ritual, I love reading the game through your eyes. Did you think I didn’t? Is that why you stopped?”

“Well, one of the girls overheard one of your teammates talk about you always getting a ton of messages and being on your phone so much after matches, so I thought maybe you didn’t like it and it was taking time away from being away from your teammates. Like maybe it was annoying for you, and since it was the final, I didn’t want to be an annoyance to you.”

Lucy is shaking her head, “No, baby, you never annoy me. Like I said, I love your commentary so much. I really missed it today.” You were glad that it was all just a misunderstanding, and that you now knew the true appreciation your girlfriend had for your messages.

“I can talk you through my thoughts right now, if you have the time?” Lucy smiles, “I would love that.” With that you start talking about the match, and end up talking the night away. 

-----

💗 If you enjoyed this fic, please consider liking, commenting, and reblogging! You can also supporting me by leaving a tip 💗b

#lucy bronze #lucy bronze x reader #lucy bronze imagine #barca femeni x reader #barca women #fcb femini #barca femini x reader #lionesses x reader #engwnt x reader #engwnt imagine #barcelona femeni x reader

[gretavangroupie]

The Ripe and The Ruin (Chapter 6)

Pairing: Jake Kiszka x Reader, OC x Reader

Word Count: 15.1k

Warnings: Language, Alcohol, Smoking, Angst, Anxiety, Allusions to Cheating, Lying, Jealousy, Sexual Themes, Kissing, Unprotected Sex.

Find the Playlist Here: Apple Music | Spotify

A new series in collaboration with my talented co-writer @gretavanmoon.

A/N: Thanks so much for waiting for us while we took our little break. We had the absolute best time at our shows. We plotted and schemed most of the week and there really is quite a bit of exciting new things on the horizon, so keep your eyes peeled.

"Like all good fruit, the balance of life is in the ripe and ruin."

PARIS, FRANCE

JAKE POV

The sound of the heat kicking on wakes you from your sleep, your heavy eyelids forcing themselves open to a blur of darkness. You drag your hand over your face, rubbing at your tired eyes as you turn to your side ready to pull her close, only to find the bed empty. You blink away the blurriness quickly, finding the place she once was, cold. 

You snap your head to the side to glance at the clock, finding it to be a little earlier than you expected. Where did she go? Had she left? You look around the room and see that her things are gone, snatching your phone from the nightstand when you realize she really did leave. You quickly unlock the screen seeing a myriad of messages and missed calls from Isla, but much to your dismay, there was nothing from Y/N.

Your mind immediately starts to race. Did she sneak out? Did Sam’s drunken rambling scare her away? You curse yourself for even letting him into the room in the first place. You throw yourself back down onto the pillows, your brain frantically searching for some kind of answer. Your thumb taps on Josh’s contact, the line ringing out before you even knew what was happening. 

“Hello?” he answers, sounding far too chipper for the early hour. 

“Hey,” you pause, “You busy?”

“Hmmm…Not at the moment,” he answers, sounding intrigued. 

“Come to my room,” you ask, your voice still tired. 

You hear him huff a laugh from the other end of the phone, “Be there in a sec.”

You end the call and toss your phone onto the nightstand as you stand to pull yourself out of bed. You dig through your suitcase for a pair of sweats, pulling them over your legs just as you hear a knock at the door. 

You blow out a breath as you walk to the door, shaking your head as you twist the lock. As you pull it open you see Josh leaning on the wall across from the door, pushing off as you wave him inside. 

“To what do I owe the pleasure of this early morning chat?” he asks smugly. 

“I just need to you to sit down and listen to me and tell me I didn’t fuck this up,” you say, pointing to the bed. He raises his eyebrows at your assertiveness, quickly complying and taking a seat on the edge of your bed. 

“Oh, did you tell her finally?” he asks, crossing his leg over his knee. 

“No, I mean, I didn’t say anything but– Sam and his big fucking mouth…He barged in here last night drunk as fuck, rambling on about Lyla and shit, asking about Isla and what was going on there, meanwhile I had Y/N in here, and since we haven’t really told anyone what we are doing I kinda… made her hide in the bathroom. I tried to get Sam out of here but he wouldn’t stop talking, and fuck I just got know she heard all the shit he said,” you pause, pacing around the room. “After he left she asked me if there was something I needed to tell her.”

“And you said?”

“I– I panicked, I don’t know! I said no! I said it was just work stuff…I know I should have told her, but we had just had the most amazing–”

“You said no?!” he shouts.

You furrow your brows in shame as you look at him, “Yeah…”

“Jake, you massive fuck up,” he scolds, shaking his head. “So not only did you hide her in the bathroom, you also lied to her face.”

“Well it sounds really fucking bad when you say it like that,” you counter, throwing your hands into the air. 

“Okay, well which part of it is untrue, Jacob?”

“This is bullshit,” you growl, kicking your foot against the floor. 

“You thought she would be totally cool hiding in the bathroom? You didn’t think she was going to get a little bit suspicious? I know I'm the smarter twin but you can’t honestly be that stupid, right?” 

“What was I supposed to do? I couldn’t let Sam see her without it causing a whole new shit storm with Isla! I did everything I could to get him out of here, but he just kept talking. Thank god he didn’t mention Isla by name, but Y/N is smart and I know she picked up on everything he was saying. I could see it all over her face. She stayed after but, I just woke up and she was gone,” you continue. 

He nods his head as he takes in everything you’re saying, a redness in his cheeks as his underlying anger bubbles to the surface. Your phone begins to buzz on the nightstand, snapping both of your attention. You rush over to it to see if it’s Y/N, but again, it’s Isla. You silence the call and toss it back to the nightstand returning to stand in front of Josh. 

“Let me guess, it’s Isla?”

“She won’t fucking stop,” you answer nodding. 

“I told you to tell her a fucking week ago, Jake,” he snaps. 

“How the fuck do you tell someone that? Like, ‘hey, I have a crazy ex who blows up my phone day and night, but oh, also she lives in my house and even though I have broken it off with her several times she keeps clawing her way back into my life and thinks we are still together’? Yeah, I’m not doing all of that.”

“No, that’s exactly what you do. You lay every single nitty gritty detail out on the line for her, and you tell her that you have baggage, and that you are trying to deal with it as gently as possible. You leave the decision in her hands. You don’t lie to her and tell her it’s nothing, when it very much is something,” he says through gritted teeth. 

“Well, it’s a little late for that now dont you think?” you snap, “How do I fix it, now.”

“Have you heard from her?” he asks, pushing himself up off the bed. 

“No,” you answer quietly. “I didn’t even know she left.”

“Fuck, Jake…” he sighs, running his fingers over his chin as he thinks. 

“I think you have two options,” he pauses, giving you a serious look. “You either do what I told you to do a long time ago, or you play it off like absolutely nothing is wrong.”

You raise your eyebrows in surprise, not expecting the second option. “Yeah? You think…you think that would work?”

He sighs and shakes his head, “I think it’s a terrible idea, but yeah I think it could work. Though my vote is for the first option.”

“I just feel like it’s not her business to know about the shit with Isla,” you counter. 

“If you are sleeping with her, it’s her business Jake, goddamn.”

“I would disagree,” you say, crossing your arms over your chest. 

He shakes his head and purses his lips in anger, “You know what? I think you just wanted me to tell you what you want to hear to patch up your wounded ego. I don’t think you have any interest in doing the right thing at all, do you Jake?” he pauses, walking over to the door. “You need to get your shit straight, man. If I were you, I would take my advice and do the right thing before this all blows up in your face.”

He slams the door behind himself as you stand staring at it, anger pouring off of you. You know he’s right, no matter how hard of a pill it is to swallow. You could see the disappointment in his eyes, the look cutting you to your core. You turn and head into the bathroom, turning on the shower and letting the steam fill the bathroom. You knew you fucked up, not only was she mad at you, but so was Josh, and right now you couldn’t think of anything worse. 

You walk back into the room, grabbing your phone from the nightstand and seeing Isla’s missed call. You let out a sigh as you swipe past it, hitting Y/N’s contact instead. The call rings for a few seconds before going to her voicemail and you feel your heart drop into your stomach. You decide a text might be better and quickly type and retype your message until you’re happy with it. In that moment you make the choice to pretend like nothing is wrong, going against Josh’s advice yet again. 

You

9:19AM: Where did you run off to this morning?

You toss the phone onto the bed and strip out of your clothes, knowing that the shower is hot and waiting for you and wondering if the plans the two of you made for the day still stand. 

—

HER POV

Earlier That Morning

You’d spent the first hour of your morning in complete darkness, refusing to open the heavy curtains of your hotel room until you were ready to be gone. You’d barely slept the night before, tossing and turning as you fought the thoughts that plagued your mind. It didn’t help that Jake’s phone had been going off all night long, illuminating the dark room with a pale blue tint after each vibrate you heard. 

Someone really wanted to talk to him. 

You could still hear Sam’s words replaying in your mind, your stomach dropping as each fleeting memory makes its way to the forefront of your mind to throw more confusion into the mix. It feels impossible to stifle them. You step out of a particularly hot shower, still proud of the fact that you’d managed to sneak out of Jake’s bed this morning without waking him. 

You run a towel through your hair as you wipe off the fogged mirror, unable to truly look at your own reflection without feeling a fucked up sense of shame. Jake didn’t deserve a formal goodbye after what happened last night. Your gut is screaming at you, heeding warnings that something isn’t right… so you stand firm in your decision to leave him alone in his bed this morning. 

You hadn’t even bothered to look at your phone yet, knowing that today is a free day, and you likely will have little to no obligations. You wrap your hair up in the fluffy towel and make your way back out to your suitcase to grab your phone charger. As it powers back to life from its dangerously low battery, you notice a singular text from just a little while ago.

Paul

6:06AM: Hey! Call when you wake up, no hurry

The clock is nearing 8, so you stay wrapped up in your towel, falling under the covers as you listen to his tone ring out. 

“Goodmorning!” Paul’s chipper greeting almost irks you. 

“Morning!” you respond with a fake lilt. 

“Hey, got a little assignment for you today, it isn’t much and shouldn’t take you very long, but the job itself might be a little bit of a pain in the ass. Crew is already running low on water, so I had some ordered and need you to go and pick it up,” he explains. 

Your face contorts up at the thought of having to load multiple cases of bottled water into whatever vehicle you’re provided with. 

“I know it’s an off day, but Murph is going to go with you… I know it will be a lot of heavy lifting so I figured he would be the best man for the job,” Paul went on, referencing Murph’s rather toned and muscular stature.

Fuck. A solo assignment with just Murph? Enough to make you want to skip out on breakfast…

“Oh, okay! I can do that, no big deal. Are you sure Murph isn’t too busy? I could ask one of the others–”

“No, I’ve already spoken with him. He should be ready and waiting for you about ten o’clock,” Paul goes on. “Just load it back into the craft supply truck when you guys get back. Thanks again, Y/N! I’ll text you the address of the place.”

“Will do. Talk to you later.” You hang up the phone and pull the heavy blankets over your head, feeling ten thousand emotions flood you at once. Murph gives you a nervous energy, something about being in his presence makes your body swell with childlike giddiness. And on the other hand, the tumultuous pool of uncertainty that you’ve been thrust into with Jake has left you feeling drained and disheartened, and you don’t even have any explanation yet. 

You’re miffed at him. Miffed as fuck. His own brother drunkenly asked him how he was handling being away for this long. You’re no scientist, but you know how to pick up on cues and connect dots, and you absolutely know when someone is lying to you. The more time you spend stewing, the more angry you become. This is most definitely not what you need right now. 

You stay buried under the covers for a long while, your hair still piled and wrapped in the damp towel on your head. You close your eyes, thinking over everything again, vowing to stay right here in bed until the last possible second before you have to leave. A quiet knock on your door startles you from your cozy cave, and you know for a fact that Jake has come to your room since you decided to sneak out this morning. You whip the blankets back, quietly rushing to the peephole to prepare yourself to pretend you aren’t in the room.

But it isn’t Jake. 

It’s Murph.

A surge of nerves overtake your half-clothed body, and you mumble a silent ‘oh my gooooooddddd’ as you decide what to do. You flick your hand out as your eyes pace around the room, one hand clutching the towel between your breasts. What would Ruth do?

Ruth would answer the door.

Your hand turns the heavy metal lever, pulling the door open only six inches or so. You’re met with a completely surprised Murph, leaning his head away and covering his eyes when he realizes he’s almost caught you in your birthday suit. 

“Shit! I’m sorry, I was just coming by to make sure… I–I can wait for you downstairs–” he scrambles, and you witness his normal tough exterior fall all to pieces as his cheeks turn pink with embarrassment. 

“No no! I’m sorry!” you cry, pulling the door closed just a little bit. “It’s no big deal…”

He grins hard as he runs a hand over his face, approaching the door again and leaning one hand on the frame. “I just… came by to make sure Paul had talked with you, didn’t want you to oversleep or…” his hand nervously falls to his hip as he regains his composure, his body obviously wracked with uneasiness. He’s cute this way…

You take a page from Ruth’s book again, pulling the towel that sat on top of your head off, letting your wet hair flow over your shoulders. His eyes grow ten times in size, but only for a second. 

“Yes, Paul called. And I’m awake,” you reply sheepishly, lowering your head to look at him through your lashes. 

“Okay, yeah. Good. I’ll uh, meet you downstairs at ten?” he asks through an anxious breath and swallow. 

You bite your cheeks in and nod, twirling a piece of wet hair around your finger. “Mhmm, I’ll be there…” You watch his eyes as he tries his best to avoid eye contact with you, or more yet, your half-naked body.

“Okay, good. I’ll–I’ll see you then,” he says as he quickly turns and makes his way back down to the elevator.

You rush back to climb under the warmth of the covers as you giddily kick your feet underneath them, knowing all too well that you just managed to get a big burly security guard flustered by hardly doing anything at all. God, he looked good already today. A black shirt and dark wash jeans, a heavy canvas zip-up jacket and his signature backwards ballcap. And he had some type of cologne on… you couldn’t quite place it, but it was familiar while also unlike anything you’d ever smelled before.

You let yourself relish in the feeling for just a little bit, and like clockwork, your phone buzzes with Jake’s contact ringing across your screen. You stare at it as it inches its way across the table, until it stops ringing completely. Nah. Not yet. Only seconds after the phone stops ringing, you see a text from him bubble up on your notifications, but you ignore that too. You need some time to think. And, you have work to do. 

You finally pull yourself from the comfort of the bed and get dressed for the day. As you grab up your purse and heavy winter coat to head off in search of coffee, you feel the pull to hash out your feelings with Ruth. After five or six rings, you hear her tired voice come over the speaker.

“Hello?”

“Hey, I know it’s hella early and shit but I need to vent…” you say as you let your hotel room door close behind you. 

“Oh my god, you okay? What’s going on?” she replies, seemingly awake now. 

“Yeah, yeah, I’m okay. Listen… so last night after the show, me and Jake… ya know. Yeah. Everything was beautiful and perfect and everything until after, we’re sitting there literally naked and his brother Sam knocked on our door, and Jake hid me in the fucking bathroom.” You try to keep your voice low and close to the phone, just in case someone happens to be nearby. 

You swear you can hear her scoff from across the ocean. “HUH?!” she squeals. “Hid you?! The fuck?”

“I know, I know… like, I get it, finding us that way wouldn’t have been the best of circumstances but, that’s not even the worst part.” You press the button in the elevator to the ground floor as you finally find a little solace in being alone. “I was trying to get dressed in the dark bathroom, and here comes Sam, needing to pee. So I jump into the shower as quietly as I can and try not to breathe while they keep talking. And, get this Ruth… Sam starts talking about how he’s having problems with his own girlfriend, saying she’s acting really weird and off lately. So Jake says maybe she’s having trouble with the time difference and missing home or some bullshit. So Sam is like ‘Yeah, maybe so…’ Then he asks Jake ‘how you two are handling that’… and that he ‘hasn’t seen Jake on his phone a lot lately…’ I dunno. Then Sam said he knows that Jake has been going through this shit for a while. Like what shit? What could he possibly be having to deal with right now?” You realize that you’re rambling again, a quality that you’ve started to take notice of in your personality as of late.

“What the fuck…” Ruth trails off, trying to run over everything you’d just said. “So, do you think he has someone back home, and just never told you about it?” Her words hit you like a dagger, and hearing your suspicious thoughts be spoken out loud nearly makes you feel sick. You step off the elevator and into the crowded lobby of people in search of breakfast. 

“I don’t know, Ruth. Maybe? But also, he would have told me, I think. Ugh, it feels so fucked up. We have plans today and tonight, too. I kind of want to blow him off…”

“Shit, you’re pissed, aren't you? I definitely think something is going on, did you ask him once Sam left?” she presses. 

You finally spot the coffee bar across the hallway, making a beeline. “Yes, and I swear it felt like he was leaving some gaps in his explanation.”

She huffs. “Trust your gut, babe. You know him better than I would.”

“What should I do?” you ask, watching as a packet of sugar crystals trail into your paper coffee cup. 

“Let him come to you. I wouldn’t give him the time of day until he decides to be honest with you, ya know? You deserve at least that much…” she says, and you can hear her figuratively putting her foot down. 

You let out a long sigh. “You’re right, I already ignored his call this morning. I need some time to think…”

“I agree with you. Maybe step back a little,” she says, yawning heavily. 

You press the plastic lid down onto your coffee and saunter over to a plush couch in a hidden corner of the lobby, ready to drown yourself in emails and this stout dark roast. “You’re right, I think I will. Thanks Ruthie, go back to sleep.”

“Already halfway there, call me later, babe,” she says quietly. “Oh, hey, do you mind if I…do a little research, if you know what I mean?” 

Your brows furrow as you contemplate. “Research…”

“Yes. You know exactly what I mean.”

“Oh,” you finally understand. “I mean, I’m not gonna stop you. As long as you report back with your findings.”

“Babe, duh. I’ll talk to you later,” she says. 

“Byeeeeee.” You press the red button on your phone, pressing the end of it to your forehead a few times before slouching down onto the couch. Ten o’clock will be here before you know it, and you feel a zap of excited electricity at knowing you get to spend the morning with none other than the flustered security guard.

—

Needless to say you were more than a little surprised to see Murph standing outside of the hotel doors leaning on a truck, his arms crossed across his chest as he scrolls on his phone. His eyes flick up, catching yours as you step outside into the cold air. You make your way towards him, pulling your jacket closed tightly across your chest. The wind is unforgiving as you get closer, blowing your hair across your face. You watch him spring into action, quickly running around to the door to open it for you. 

“Thanks,” you smile, jumping into the warm cab. He nods his head and runs around the opposite side of the truck, sliding in next to you. He turns the knob for the heat and you instantly start to warm up. 

“How’d you manage to finesse a truck in another country?” you laugh, placing your bag on the floorboard. 

“Ahh, been here a few times now, feel pretty good on the roads. That and I’m not letting someone drive me around. I’m perfectly capable, so I made a few calls,” he grins, shifting the truck into drive. 

“Do you know where we’re even going?” you ask, pulling your phone from your purse. 

“I think so, but why don’t you just tell me anyway,” he smirks, pulling out into traffic. The traffic patterns are foreign to you, but he seems to be handling them with ease, and that alone has you able to relax a bit. 

“Okay, so per Paul, it looks like we are heading to a bulk grocer, and the address is 47 Rue Saint-Jacques,” you answer. “The order has already been placed, we’re just picking it up.”

He taps on his phone screen a few times as he types in the address, nodding his head as he previews the route. “Looks like we’ve got about twenty minutes ahead of us.”

“That’s not bad at all, maybe this will be a quick trip after all,” you smile towards him. 

He huffs a laugh as he readjusts his hat on his head, “Maybe so.”

—

Murph takes the lead loading the cases of water into the truck bed, insisting he will do all of it. You feel bad as you just stand by watching, but he seems like the type of guy to bear the burden of most things with no regrets. He swipes his hand across his brow and fixes his hat, letting out a breath as he closes the truck bed. 

“That all of it?”

“I think so!” you pause, “Thanks for doing all of that, I feel kind of useless.” 

“Nah, not at all,” he smirks, nodding towards the truck. You both get into the warm cab and as you reach for your phone, you find the screen filled with notifications from Ruth. For the past twenty minutes your phone had been ringing and numerous texts had come through, the last one reading ‘SOS’.

Your heart drops into your stomach as you consider that something bad has happened, your hands shaking as you tap her contact and listen to the call ring. She doesn’t answer and the sick feeling in your stomach grows. You shakily type a message to her, hoping she will see it. 

You

10:49AM: WHAT IS HAPPENING

10:49AM: I’M ON A WORK THING WITH MURPH AND I DIDNT SEE MY PHONE

You lock your screen as your knee bounces nervously, picking at your nails with your fingers. 

“You okay?” he asks, turning to look at you. 

“Yeah, yeah, I’m okay, just missed an important call that's all,” you say, trying not to go into too much detail. “Tell me about you, distract me,” you beg. 

“About me?” he asks, “Uhh, what do you want to know?”

“I don’t know, anything, something. Tell me…tell me how you got into this business.”

“How I got into this business… My that's kind of a loaded first question,” he laughs, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel. “Well, I’ve always sort of just…protected people. Done it my whole life. Kind of like instinct I guess. Got a little older and realized it’s what I was meant to do. Joined the military when I turned seventeen, stayed in for a long time. Did a few tours, saw some wild shit, and now I’m on reserves. I joined a little group of guys who also weren’t ready to stop and now we do close range protection. Got a call one day I’d been hired to watch over these guys and now here I am hauling water into the back of a truck and driving around a pretty girl.”

Your heart flutters in your chest at his admission. Shit. 

“You never wanted to do anything else?” you ask. 

“No. I feel my best when I am protecting others,” he says, his face stern and serious. “It’s in my blood.”

“That's very…admirable,” you say, feeling yourself swooning over the man next to you.

“Ahh, that’s not why I do it, though it does feel good to hear you say it,” he winks.

You feel your cheeks grow warm when he winks at you, and you quickly face forward before he notices. He smiles softly as he whips the truck through the streets, chewing his gum casually. 

Your phone starts to buzz in your lap, instantly zapping your attention. 

Ruth

11:02AM: CODE RED

11:02AM: SOS 

11:02AM: ANSWER MEEEEEEEE

You

11:03AM: WHAT! I’m here!!!

The next message that comes through is a photo, and not one you expected to see. It’s Jake and another woman looking awfully cozy on a porch swing. She’s pretty, gorgeous even. Way prettier than you are. It's a screenshot of an Instagram profile, the date of the photo showing it was posted almost a year ago. Your heart sinks again as you look at it, seeing Jake’s arm wrapped around her as her hand rests on his thigh. The caption reads ‘forever’. You swallow back the lump in your throat as you go back to your texts with Ruth. 

You

11:05AM: Holy fuck, where did you find that?

Ruth

11:06AM: On her profile, there's tons, babe. Some are…recent. Like very recent.

You

11:07AM: So he lied? He has a girlfriend? 

11:07AM: Oh shit am I a homewrecker? Oh my god and his phone was blowing up all night. I am totally a homewrecker bitch. 

11:08AM: HE LIEEEDDDD TO ME

11:08AM: RUTH WHAT DO I DO HELP ME 

Ruth

11:09AM: I don’t know for sure if they are together or not, the last post of the two of them was almost 6 months ago.

11:10AM: I wish I knew what to tell you, but I don’t know this guy at all and I can’t get a good read on her just from her socials. If they aren’t together now they definitely were recently. She used to post about him a lot and now she has slacked off a good bit. 

You

11:11AM: How did you even find her?

Ruth

11:12AM: Don’t ask questions you don’t want the answers to. ( I had to make a whole ass fake profile )

You

11:13AM: RUTHIE

Ruth

11:14AM: What?! I did what had to be done. I have no regrets, and all it took was a quick search of a tagged photo of the bassists girlfriend to find her. Did you know they do pilates together? Rich bitches. So anyways now my name is Cassandra and I also take Pilates classes at Well Body Pilates. 💅🏻

You

11:15AM: You found her through Sam’s girlfriend?!

Ruth

11:16AM: My mind is an intricate and beautiful web of deception and mischief 

You

11:17AM: Yeah, it’s also sick and twisted. Keep digging. I need to know what I’m dealing with here. I still haven't spoken to Jake.

11:17AM: Well, not really. He added a song to the playlist and I replied to it. I don’t know what I’m doing Ruth…

Ruth

11:18AM: Oh trust me, I’m digging and I don’t blame you for not answering him. I wouldn’t speak to him either. 

11:18AM: Little RAT

You

11:19AM: Ruth…

Ruth

11:20AM: 😇

Your heart is pounding in your chest as you look at the photo again. He looks happy. You feel your heart twist a little at the thought of him being in a relationship and cheating. You really didn’t think he was that kind of guy. You swallow the lump in your throat just as Murph turns to look at you. 

“Hey, uh, are you hungry?” he asks. 

You blink away your emotions, nodding your head. “Yeah, actually… I am.” you answer, knowing that you were supposed to spend the day with Jake, but now you can hardly stomach the thought. 

“You like pizza?” he smirks, raising an eyebrow. 

“Of course! Who doesn’t like pizza?”

He laughs a hearty laugh and tosses his head back a bit, “Good, that’s good, I know just the place.”

Your phone buzzes once more in your lap, and you flip it over to see another text from Ruth. 

Ruth 

11:22AM: Ps, who is Murph?

You smirk as you realize you haven’t gone into much detail about this new addition to the crew, yet. As he pays heavy attention to traffic and stoplights, you twist your phone in your lap to snap the sneakiest picture of him to send to Ruth. 

You

11:23AM: *Attachment*

New security guard. CUTE security guard. 😊

Ruth

11:24AM: Well HELLO THERE sir!!

11:24AM: Bitch if you don’t flirt with him, I’m flying across the ocean to do it myself

11:25AM: Jake who?????

You

11:25AM: I’m at work, Ruthie. Remember. 

11:26AM: But yeah we be flirting a little😛

You lock your phone to turn your attention back to professionalism, listening to the light music coming from the radio station Murph had chosen. 

JAKE POV

You stay close behind Josh and Ty as you meander the back alleyways of the city, taking in the beauty of the architecture and old-world style of the storefronts. Monty has tagged along today, hanging back and taking phone calls as the three of you walk. It’s cold, but not as cold as what you’d been enduring the past few days. Typically, you’d spend these free days by yourself, either hiding away in the hotel room or finding something private to partake in. Or, as of late, you would have spent it with Y/N, but after multiple texts and a phone call went ignored this morning, you decided to focus your attention elsewhere. 

“Odd of you to tag along with us, brother. Need to stretch your legs today?” Josh asks, pulling back from Ty a little. You know the tension is still high from your argument this morning, but you can tell that Josh is trying to brush it off to keep a cool head in front of Ty.

“Yeah, well. If you remember, I had plans today, but. They kind of fell through…” you answer him, avoiding eye contact. 

“Oh, with Y/N,” he acts like he only just remembered.

You nod, rolling your eyes. “Yeah, but she kind of blew me off. Hasn’t answered me all morning, still.”

“Ah,” Josh says with a slightly sarcastic tone. “Probably because Paul sent her out to get something for the crew, and Murph went with her.”

Wait, Murph?

“Murph went with her? Why? Where did she have to go?” you have a million questions, and you aren’t sure which ones to ask first.

Josh bites his tongue as he decides what to say. “I think they had to go get water for the crew or something, was gonna be a big job, so Murph volunteered to go and help her get it,” he explains. “They should be back later, though. Isn’t she coming up to the Tower with us later?”

You feel yourself seething. “Yeah. Well, was supposed to. Was supposed to hang out right now, too, but. We see how that ended up.”

“It’s not her fault, Jake, shit. Paul sent her on an assignment…”Josh defends her with a shrug. “I can tell you’re pissed for some reason. And I know it’s just not at me from this morning…”

“I’m not…pissed about that, I’m pissed she's actively ignoring me after what happened last night with–” You cut yourself off, truly not wanting to go into detail about Sam’s unexpected visit and what happened thereafter in front of Ty. 

“With Sam…? Yeah. I see you still haven’t heeded my advice…” he says with a snarl, whispering away from earshot of Ty. He shakes his head at you as you stay silent. He turns and stops you in your tracks, forming the illusion of an explosion with his fingers and hands, right in front of your face. “Ka-boom!” he whispers before turning away again. 

You know he’s right. This is all going to blow up in your face. 

Josh and Ty skip on ahead of you, slipping into a pub or something, you don’t know. You pull your phone from your pocket, seeing that she still hasn’t sent a thing. You swipe through a few notifications from Isla, knowing that those can be dealt with later, and bring up your music app to see if adding another song will get something out of her. 

What to add…

You file through your extensive library, finally landing on a song that’s a little out of your realm of normal listening, but will still catch her attention. You click the song, ‘While I’m Waiting Here’ by Billy Strings, selecting the three dots and adding it to the playlist. You hope she will see it and know that you’re still thinking about her, wanting to make this work, but at the same time you know you have buried yourself deep inside a hole that is lined with explosives, and all you can do is wait for the spark to ignite them. 

Should you have listened to Josh? Yes, absolutely. He’s right, you know he is. Josh is the angel on your shoulder whispering in your ear to err on the side of reason and honesty. But the devil on the other shoulder is standing firm in the fact that it’s truly none of Y/N’s business to know the details about your past with Isla; as far as you’re concerned, that part of your life is done. 

…But it’s not. It’s far from done. She still lives with you. The little devil is just spouting the words that you want to hear, weaving lies and deceit into his corrupt advice, and making you believe it to be justified.

You shove your phone back into your pocket as you slip inside the hidden pub door behind Ty and Josh, feeling the need for a beer the size of your head to take this fucking edge off. It’s truly pissing you off how hung up you are on this girl, and you’re even more pissed that she’s spending her day with a man that you know for a fact was able to make you extremely jealous. 

You take a barstool next to Josh as he orders three of the same whatever, and you slump down onto your elbows as you stare at the intricate mosaic artwork that adorns the short bartop. Your finger glides along the multicolored tiles, tracing the grout between them as you let your mind wander. Maybe you should just tell her. Tell her everything.

Suddenly a giant glass stein of beer is firmly plopped in front of your sullen face as Josh nudges his elbow into your shoulder. “Wake up, Eeyore. Time to take advantage of our day,” he heeds, so you slowly sit up. You truly must be presenting yourself like a heartbroken asshole.

You give him the evil eye as you lift the mug to your lips, letting the foam graze across your mustache. For the first time in a while, the instant jolt of alcohol hitting your system isn’t as much welcomed as it is irritating, but you decide to get past it, because what the fuck else are you gonna do?

You suddenly feel your phone buzz in your pocket, and your mood instantly lightens. You rip it out quickly, tapping the screen to see that finally, she has made contact. 

‘Y/N Added A Song to Your Shared Playlist: 🐥’

The song she chose nearly made your heart fall straight into the hardwood floor beneath you. ‘Suspicious Minds’ by Elvis Presley.

Fuck. Fuck fuck. 

Could this truly get any fucking worse? And better yet, how in the hell are you going to fix it in such a way that you get a happy ending? You decide to grasp on to the fleeting second, opening your text thread with her to make contact even further. 

You

11:48AM: We still on for later?

Your heart rate spikes as you watch your phone in anticipation, feeling completely stupid for being this giddy and also somehow even more confused than before. You know she knows something is up, now. Suspicious is the absolute last thing you want her to be, but… she is a smart person. And you’ve been the idiot. 

Her text bubble pops up, typing for a very long time. 

Finally you receive a wordless text, a ‘👍🏼’ her only response. Okay, so it’s not a thumbs down, at least? But still, you were expecting at least a Yes. You decide to cut your losses, taking the contact as a tiny win, but knowing that the gut feeling of dread is only going to get worse as this beer in your hand empties.

—

The day passes without another word from her, and you know because you spent a large majority of the day checking your phone. You now find yourself pacing around your hotel room as you wait to hear about your evening plans, wondering if she would be involved in them.

You

7:56PM: What's the plan 

Sam

7:57PM: Aren’t we going to the towa

Josh

7:58PM: Yeah, I think we are meeting everyone downstairs at 8:30

You

7:58PM: Who all is going?

Josh

7:59PM: Everyone, it’s a crew outing

You

7:59PM: Great.

Josh

8:00PM: Suck it up Jake

Daniel

8:01PM: Yeah Jake 😋

You lock your phone and toss it on your bed, still a disheveled mess from this morning. You continue to pace around your room as your mind swirls with thoughts. You wonder why you hadn’t heard from her, even after her confirmation earlier. You wonder if she spent the whole day with Murph and what they did together. You grit your teeth together at the thought, snatching your phone off of the bed and deciding that if this is how she wants to do things, you too could play that game. 

As everyone assembles down in the lobby you find yourself looking for her, wanting just a glimpse of her to prove your wandering thoughts wrong. You groan inwardly when you find she isn’t around, and not shockingly, neither is Murph. As everyone loads into the vans you check your phone again, and still you have nothing from her. You find yourself getting a little pissed off at this game she is playing and again you tell yourself you can play it too, your desire growing by the second.

The ride to the tower is short, your knee bouncing the entire ride as you stare out the window. It's not long before you’re all piling out and breaking into groups, waiting for the last few stragglers to arrive. In the distance you see two people rushing towards you, laughing and smiling as they approach. You suck your teeth when you realize it's Y/N and Murph, definitely running late from what appears to be their day off spent together. 

You shove your hands in your pockets and turn to Josh, raising your eyebrows in question. He peers over your shoulder and catches sight of them, shrugging his shoulders before turning his attention back to Ty. Right.  

The two of them regain their composure quickly, but you can tell that Y/N has been drinking. Her cheeks are pink and a smile hasn’t left her face since she stepped up to the group. She hasn’t made eye contact with you yet, and you wonder if she even will. You turn to face them, giving her no choice but to acknowledge you, and when her eyes finally meet yours it's only for a split second before she tears them away. 

Okay, what the fuck.

Murph steps away to talk to Dean, and you finally get a second alone with her, hoping she will give you the time of day. 

“And where have you been all day?” you ask playfully, raising a brow. 

She raises her own and purses her lips, “Running errands for you and your crew.”

“Is that right? I thought you were off today?”

“I thought so too, apparently there was no water left and I couldn’t get it all on my own,” she answers, an edge of confrontation in her voice. Murph steps back over towards her, catching the tail end of the conversation. 

“I could have gone with you, you know.”

“No need man, I took good care of her,” Murph smiles, patting you on the back. 

You do your best to stifle back the scoff begging to rattle from your chest, nodding your head at him. “Yeah, I’m sure.”

The tour guide speaks up before he can answer, grabbing your attention to lead the group towards the entrance to the tower. You turn to look at Y/N, her eyes already on you as you meet them and you can tell there is something she wants to say. Instead, she walks ahead letting Murph trail behind her. 

—

Most of the tour is spent casting glances at each other, speaking with your eyes instead of your words. There is tension between the two of you, you can feel its cold grip around your neck with every meeting of your eyes. You were supposed to do this with her. You were supposed to bring her here. Just the two of you. Had she forgotten? Did she change her mind overnight? It would explain a lot. 

As you stare out into the twinkling city beneath you, the cold wind blows your scarf around. You find yourself wishing it was just the two of you, pointing out monuments and landmarks as you held her close to keep her warm. You turn around to look for her, deciding that you had to say something. Just get some kind of answer. 

You find her hanging out with Josh and Ty, the three of them smiling and laughing as Murph patrols the area for any potential threats. Josh notices you and breaks away from them, meeting you where you were instead of letting you join them. 

“First, fix your face. If you’re trying to sell the ‘nothing is wrong’ bit you’re doing a miserable job,” he says, placing his hand on his hip. 

You roll your eyes in response, flashing him a faux smile as you push him out of the way and head over towards her. Her eyes meet yours, her lips parting in surprise as you hear your name called from behind you. You look over your shoulder to find a woman with a longing look and a twinkle in her eye, nervously approaching. 

Murph rushes up behind her, giving you a look to let you know he will escort her away if you want him to. You quickly shake your head no, knowing that you can use this interaction to your advantage. 

“Hi, how are you?” you smile, greeting the woman excitedly. She's about your age, maybe a year or two younger, with striking eyes. 

“Hi Jake! I don’t mean to bother you, I was just wondering if I could take a picture with you? My friend and I?” she asks, motioning her equally as attractive friend toward her. 

“Hi there, nice to meet you,” you say, motioning them both in for a hug. You pull them in close, posing for a few photos as Y/N stands by watching. If you are right, and if you know her like you think you do, this will set her off. 

You can feel her eyes on you as you continue to talk and interact with the fans, all the while your mind filled with thoughts of her and the dark pink shade that has taken over her cheeks. 

You say goodbye to the fans, sending them off with a wave, turning on your heel to join Josh, Ty, and Y/N at the opposite end of the tower. 

“How they hell do they find us all the way up here?” Josh laughs, elbowing your arm. 

“No problem to take a photo or two with some pretty girls,” you quip, raising a brow at him. 

“Never is, is it Jake?” he laughs, and as you nod your head you flash a smile right to Y/N, knowing that your plan worked perfectly. 

—

You all load into the vans, making your way back towards the hotel. Y/N rides with Paul and Wes, and you know she is positively stewing with jealousy over your impromptu meet and greet. She would talk to you now, you were sure of it. You just had to wait. 

 As the vans drop you off at the hotel lobby you all meander inside, some of you opting for the hotel bar, while others headed up to their rooms. You stood off to the side, waiting to see what Y/N was going to do, and you think she was planning to do the same, that is, until Murph stepped up to her. 

“I can walk you up to your room if you want,” he offers, causing a scoff to leave your lips. You step up to the both of them with your hands in your pockets. 

“Why don’t I walk her up so that you can do your job and watch those idiots heading into the bar.”

He gives you a surprised look and nods his head. He bites his lips as he turns to Y/N, telling her a quick goodnight before disappearing into the hotel bar. Just when you think you’ve got her, Ty swoops in. 

“Actually, I’m walking her. Let’s go Y/N,” Ty says, linking arms with her and dragging her into the elevator with him. She shoots you a snarky look as the doors close, leaving you standing in the lobby empty handed, yet again. 

As you make your way up to your room, you start to think that your plan has backfired, and that not only have you made her mad, you’ve made her unnecessarily jealous too. You consider texting her as your door shuts behind you, but decide to leave the ball in her court and see if she reaches out. 

You take a quick shower, and wander back into your room, hearing your phone buzz on the nightstand. Your head instantly snaps over to look at it, hoping to see a message from her.  As you snatch it off the small nightstand your cheeks instantly heat seeing the notification on your screen. 

‘Y/N Added A Song to Your Shared Playlist: 🐥’

You immediately tap the banner, watching as the playlist populates before your eyes. Your breath is stolen away as you see her addition, a smile pulling across your lips. ‘Need You Tonight’ by INXS was added two minutes ago. 

You realize what she is saying, and you consider responding with a song but you decide to up the ante and call her directly. The line rings only twice before she answers. 

“Hello?”

“Well, well, well,” you start, quickly getting cut off before you can finish your sentence. 

“Shut up, come to my room,” she snaps. 

“A little feisty this evening?” you taunt.

“Are you coming or not,” she whines. 

“Oh, so now you want to talk to me? It was the girls, wasn’t it, baby…”

“Have any of the girls ever told you that you have a big head?” she gripes. 

“No, but they’ve told me I have a massive di–” you start, hearing the chime as the call ends. She got you there. 

You quickly change into a pair of sweats and a t-shirt, leaving your phone on the nightstand and swiping your room key as you rush out the door in search of her room without a second thought. 

—

You rap your knuckles against her door, stepping back as you wait for her to open it. Your nerves are swirling around in your body and you feel like you’re positively vibrating. You know you need to talk to her, but right now she wants you and you would never deny her that. 

The door swings open, revealing her barely there silky pajama set hanging haphazardly from her shoulders. She ushers you inside, shutting the door behind you. 

“I thought you’d come,” she quips. 

“Had to. First I’ve heard from you all day…” you taunt. “You forget about me?”

She pulls you by your hand into the room, sitting the two of you on the edge of the bed.

“No, didn’t forget at all, actually. Was just…preoccupied.”

“Mhmm, thought we had plans,” you say, brushing the hair away from her shoulder. 

“We did, but…”

“But what?” you ask, running your fingers down her arm. 

“But I had to do my job. You know the thing I’m here to do…” she grins. 

“I could have gone with you, you know.”

“Yeah, you could have but Murph offered.” she continues. 

“Yeah, did you two have fun on your little date?” you ask. 

“Date? Who said it was a date?” she questions. 

“Did you spend the entire day together? Did you show up to the tower a little tipsy or was that just my imagination?” you prompt. 

“You seem a little bit jealous, Jacob,” she says, resting her hand on your thigh. 

“Why’d you blow me off for him?”

“I was just doing my job and so was he,” she answers, feigning ignorance. 

You cup her cheek in your hand, letting your thumb rest on her lips, “Lie to me again.”

“Was just work.”

You pull her into your lap, connecting your lips to hers in a desperate, needy kiss. Her arms wrap around your neck as your hands settle on her hips, pulling her down to yours. 

“You need a reminder of why I’m here and he’s not?”

She parts her lips from yours, glossy and wet, “It’s not too late…”

A growl leaves your chest as you flip her over onto the bed, pinning her arms above her head with your hands. 

“Why are you being so ornery this evening, hm?” you ask, pressing your lips to her neck. 

“Why are you being so jealous?” she counters. 

“M’not jealous sweetheart,” you offer, sliding the straps of her top over her shoulders. 

“You’re surely acting it,” she says, letting you pull the top over her chest. 

“Just like you weren’t jealous of those girls tonight? I know that's why you called me here, baby.”

You press your lips to her chest, sucking a dark pink mark into her skin as her hands weave into your hair. 

“We never set any boundaries Jake. I’m not yours.”

You press your finger into the pink mark on her chest, blooming purple beneath your touch, “This would beg to differ.”

“We’re just sleeping together, Jake.”

“I’m well aware,” you say, dusting your thumb over her hardened nipple.

“So do what you’re here for…”

“Oh, you think you call the shots now? I have bad news for you, baby,” you say, tugging her shorts over her hips. 

“You think you’re in charge here?” she asks, shimming her hips to kick off the silky shorts.

“I know I am,” you answer, pulling your shirt over your head. 

“You would like to think that wouldn’t you,” she counters, watching you push your sweats down your legs. 

“You better watch it sweetheart, you’ve got me a little pissed off as it is,” you warn. 

“Me? What could I have done?” she smirks. 

“You know exactly what you did,” you answer.

She flashes you a knowing grin, wrapping her arms around your neck and pulling your lips down to hers connecting your mouths in a fiery kiss. Her tongue slides across your lips just as you part them, letting your tongue tangle with hers. She tastes of wine and mint, her tongue hot on your own. Your hand grips into her waist, feeling the smoothness of her skin on your fingers. 

You feel her hand snake between the two of you, grabbing your length and stroking you as her lips continue to explore yours. She pulls your body down to hers, swiping your tip through her wet center. You suck in a deep breath feeling her arousal coating you, and you realize that this game of cat and mouse has you more worked up than you thought. 

You push her hand away, taking back control, grabbing your dick as you continue to tease her. She is squirming beneath you, as desperate for you as you are for her. Her eyes are dark, her hair splayed across the pillow beneath her head as she looks at you. Her chest is heaving as she watches, the dim lighting in the room casting the perfect shadow against her body. 

You lick your lips as you press yourself to her entrance, her mouth forming a perfect ‘O’ as you push forward into her. You sink in easily, her body ready and willing to accept every inch of you as if it had been waiting for you. You settle yourself on your elbow above her, letting your free hand fall to her throat. You can feel her pulse beneath your fingers, rapid and pounding as her body adjusts to you. The darkness in her eyes grows as your grip on her neck tightens. 

“Yeah? You want more?” you ask, letting your fingertips dig into her skin. She nods her head quickly, biting her bottom lip. 

“Fuck,” you breathe, tightening the grip across her trachea just a little harder, forcing the breath from her lungs and her eyes to close shut. You take the initiative and pull yourself from her, thrusting back in almost as hard as you can, pausing there as you loosen your grip. 

Her eyes flash open as she inhales, a pitiful whine falling from her chest. “Fuck, Jake, just go…please, keep going…” she breathes, digging her nails into the skin of your back. 

“Feeling needy now, baby? What switched, huh?” you pant, feeling her squeeze herself around you. You pull out slowly, completely disconnecting yourself from her. Your hand is still balanced across her throat, waiting again for the opportune moment. “Ignore me all damn day, fuck…”

She bites her lips in as you hover above her, not wanting to give her the satisfaction of being fucked at her will. She stays quiet. 

“Nothing to say now?” You ask, gliding your tip along her wetness as you hear her breath hitch. 

“You’re the one who should have something to say, Jacob,” she bites, giving you a stern look of defiance. 

You huff in discernment, knowing exactly what she means, but still unable to go through with any conversation. She raises an eyebrow, her fingers still digging into your muscles. You're absolutely throbbing, your body begging you to get back to the task at hand. 

“It’s okay, I know you were preoccupied all day, watching my texts come over your phone… I was alone all day, wondering why you were the one to leave me high and dry this time…” you squeeze your fingers around her neck again as you thrust forward into her with a devilish grin, watching her face contort. You pick up the pace now, using your free hand to balance above her. 

Still yet though, she stays silent, leaving the room open for you to speak on what has been clouding both of your minds since Sam walked out the door last night. 

You can’t. You just fucking can’t. 

You continue pounding into her, the sound of your skin slapping together bouncing off the hotel room walls, uncaring of who could hear as they passed by in the hallway. Her whines become more desperate as your grip on her neck tightens, but you need her to know you’re serious about this, about how she blew you off without hardly a word. 

You pull yourself from her, standing onto the floor and reaching to turn her body around to lie on her stomach. You grip her ankles, yanking her down to stand on the floor with you before you press her top half down onto the bed, effectively bending her in half. 

You re-enter her from behind, gripping a hand in her hair as you turn her head to the side. Her cheeks are pink and puffy, her eyes glazed over with pleasure. Your thrusts feel unhinged and sloppy as you feel the sweat pooling between your eyebrows and across your chest. 

“Tell me you’re mine, Y/N…” you lean down, growling in her ear. “Say this is more than just sleeping together…”

She takes a sharp inhale as you drive yourself particularly deep. “I’m not yours, Jacob…that’s the thing. You—you never told me you wanted something m-more than this…” she breathes. 

You grit your teeth as you realize she’s right yet again. I’m not yours…

When you don’t answer her, she speaks up again. “D-do you want to be…mine?” She coos, almost a whisper that stands out against the loud obscenities happening in the room. 

Fuck… there it is, the fourth wall, broken. 

You open your mouth to answer her, yes, yes! I want to be yours, I want you to be mine… but only air escapes your lips. Suddenly when you look down at the beautiful woman you’re having sex with, all you can see is Isla. 

All you can feel is guilt. All you can experience is remorse, and regret, and wrongfulness…

You feel like a shell of yourself. This isn’t right, you and Isla are done. Over with. You can’t stand the thought of being with anyone else except Y/N even if you tried. 

But there, the image of the gorgeous face of your first love is burying itself deep into the fibers of your being. 

You don’t love Isla anymore. Your subconscious is just telling you you need to make this right. 

“Jake…” her voice pulls you from your thoughts. “Guess I’ll take that as a no…”

You pull her hair again, lifting her body back to stand with yours, back to chest. “You take that as no one else can fuck you like I do…no one else can make you feel like I can, isn’t that right, baby?” you crow, avoiding the subject altogether. Stupid. Fucking stupid. 

You continue fucking into her, her hands reaching back behind you to twist into your hair as you feel her getting closer; your words making her come unraveled. “Tell me I’m right, tell me it’s just me…”

She keeps quiet as she steps one knee followed by the other onto the bed, arching her back and stepping her knees apart for you to sink more deeply into her. Fuck, this view…

“God damnit baby, you don’t know what you do to me…” you purr, grabbing her asscheeks with both hands as your thrusts become erratic and jagged, you almost forget that she didn’t answer you. 

Her cries become deafeningly high as your fingers dig into her, unbridled and vicious, both of you searching for that high you are so close to reaching. 

“Ja-aaake…” she cries, her legs shaking and jerking as you feel her muscles fluttering around you as she unravels, and you aren't far behind. You pull out, sending your streams across her back as your vision blinds you with white light. 

You both stay in that position for a minute or so as you catch your breath, skin hot and dripping as you feel the weight of the situation come down over you. You slip to the bathroom to get her a warm cloth, returning back to the room to get her cleaned up. 

As the two of you lay spent and sweaty on the sheets you hear her phone buzz on the dresser and realize you left yours in your room. You roll towards her as she reaches for it, swiping away a calendar notification with a gentle sigh. You press a kiss to her bare shoulder, watching her eyes blink slowly as she looks at the screen. You want to talk to her. You want to tell her everything that happened between you and Isla. Everything that is still happening. But again, you fear ruining what feels like such a perfect moment with something so dark and twisted.

“Early day tomorrow,” she says, her voice tired. 

“Yeah, I think we have a few interviews before soundcheck,” you confirm. “Though, I don’t know what time. I left my phone in my room.”

“How come?”

“Oh, um, no reason. Just didn’t need it. You’re the only person I wanted to talk to I suppose,” you answer.

“You should probably check, you might have to be up early too,” she grins. 

“I guess I could go grab it,” you smile back, feeling a warmth in your chest that she doesn't want you to leave. 

You stand up from the bed, pulling your sweats back on and your shirt over your head. You pull your room key from your pocket and just as you are about to speak she stops you. 

“I’ll see you in the morning?”

Oh. Oh you got this all wrong. 

Fuck. 

You clear your throat in surprise, “Oh um. Yeah, yeah I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Goodnight, Jake…”

“Night, beautiful,” you answer, walking towards her door. You step through the doorway feeling more confused than you ever had. After the sex, what she said, everything in between, her actions were not meeting up with her words. 

You spend the entire walk back to your room thinking about it. You just got booty called and kicked to the curb. While this is typically something that wouldn’t bother you, tonight it did. It stings a little, mostly because it was her. You try not to think too much more about it as your door shuts behind you, and as you step over to find your phone right where you left it, you see a missed call from Isla, only driving in the knife in your chest a little deeper. 

—

HER POV

As you rip the plastic covering off a veggie tray, you hear the green room door squeak open, revealing the smiling face of Murph popping inside. 

“Hey, you all good in here?” he asks, glancing around to find you alone and busy. “Need a hand with anything?”

You grin and shake your head side to side. “No, I’m all good, thanks. You not busy rushing around chasing after those four?”

He bites his upper lip. “Um, yes. I am. Just wanted to say hello.” His hand slaps the wooden door as you give him a thankful smile, and it swings closed as he leaves you alone again. 

Just wanted to say hello, huh?

Your chest feels warm at his little sentiment, as careless as it was. The morning spent with him was nothing short of a mental reset, seeing as how the life you’ve been living with Jake now feels like a rollercoaster that’s about to break apart at the highest point. You’d spent your morning laughing and sharing stories with Murph as he expertly navigated the streets of Paris, your mind effortlessly drifting away from the impending drama that Ruth had discovered. Murph took your mind off it without even trying.

You hear your text notification ding on your phone as you finalize the craft table, and you pull it out to see a text from Ruth. 

Ruth

4:59PM: You’re still ignoring him, right? Not giving him the time of fucking day, RIGHT?

You

5:00PM: Well, yes and no…

Ruth

5:00PM: BITCH? What do you mean????

You dust your hands off and take a seat on the couch, crossing your legs and remembering that someone could invade your privacy at any given minute. 

You

5:01PM: We kinda… hooked up again last night?

Ruth

5:02PM: ALKSJFLSKGFHLKSDJFBNL

5:02PM: Please tell me you’re fucking joking…

You

5:03PM: 😬

Ruth

5:03PM: Oh my fucking goddddd Y/N okay. Okay! It’s fine. I hate you, what the fuck?

You

5:04PM: I DONT KNOW! Listen. I was trying to give him an opportunity to talk to me. And he didn’t. If it’s any consolation, he tried to act all big and bad about hooking up, and I didn’t play into it AT ALL. In fact I kicked him out promptly after.

Ruth

5:06PM: I’m screaming into the void.

5:06PM: So what now?

You

5:06PM: Now nothing. I’m back to avoiding him.

Ruth

5:06PM: Ok slay I guess.

You

5:07PM: And I guess that we will go out tonight after the show.

Ruth

5:02PM: Just the two of you? Or is Hottie McSexy coming along too?

You

5:03PM: Everyone usually goes. And seeing as how it’s his job to be up their asses, I’m positive McSexy will be there too.

Ruth

5:04PM: Okay and maybe The Rat will take this opportunity to explain to you that he has a female counterpart waiting for him at home, yes? Since he didn’t do it before FUCKING YOU last night?

You

5:05PM: I’m hoping. Until then, I ignore him harder. 

Ruth

5:05PM: That’s my boo thang. Lmk how it goes.

You scroll up in your texts with Ruth, seeing the dreaded screenshots of Jake with her, sitting comfortably together on what you imagine to be their porch swing. She’s so fucking pretty… he’d be stupid to let her go? 

You take a deep breath, the reminder of it all making you build your wall up even higher. You glance at his backpack sitting in the corner where he always tends to leave it, making the decision that tonight, you won’t fulfill his request for grabbing his wine. Honestly, he can figure something else out. There are plenty of options in the refrigerator. Fuck it. 

—

You stay absent when they take the stage, requesting that Paul hand them their drinks tonight, as you have a “female emergency” to attend to in the restroom. Complete lie, but he doesn’t ask questions. You hide away in the restroom as you envision Jake’s confusion when Paul doesn’t have a drink to hand him. Paul normally doesn’t have much to do during the actual shows, so grabbing a drink or two for Jake shouldn’t be an issue. 

After about ten minutes of hiding you rejoin Paul, noticing that he had grabbed a few seltzers for Jake and lined them up beside his amp. Ha ha. Watching the show alone from side stage feels strange tonight as Ty, Mia, and Lyla have decided to stand on Sam’s side. You hang back in the wings a bit, distracting yourself from watching Jake try his best to get your attention for the entirety of the show. But you don’t let him get the best of you, intentionally ripping your eyes away from him each and every time eye contact is made.

After the encore, you energetically hand Josh, Danny, and Sam their towels, showing little to no emotion in the act of handing Jake his, at all. You have to let him know you’re upset. And if he doesn’t pick up on your body language and lack of communication, he will at least notice your blatant ignorance of his existence. 

You fall into the middle of the group as everyone exits backstage toward the green room. “Hey, Y/N, talk to me…” you hear him say from behind you as he grabs your hand, pulling you back from following everyone else down the dimly lit hallway. “What’s going on?” he asks when you finally turn, his eyes full of heavy sorrow. 

You rip your hand from his grasp, his touch feeling like a foreign stranger. “Nothing, Jake,” you lie, biting your tongue and turning to walk away. 

“Hey, please, talk to me…” he begs, his hand raking across your back as you turn away. “I know I… we need to talk, I think…” his voice is strained over the loud sound of the exit song. 

“You think?” you bark back, making harsh eye contact with him for the first time all night. He’s left speechless as Murph makes his way up behind you, pulling you away from the moment. He shines his flashlight onto the ground in front of Jake, ushering him along. 

“Come on Jake, let’s get you out of here…” Murph pushes without even giving you a passing glance.

Jake gives him a quick look of distaste before giving you an up down, and following behind Murph as they make their way down the remainder of the hallway. You’re left standing alone in the darkness under the high metal beams of the stage, feeling more conflicted than ever. And not to mention, still seething with anger. 

—

Your hands feel shaky as you busy yourself with cleaning up the food and drinks in the green room, your face flushed and your hearing muddled as the anger courses its way through your veins. It’s hot and loud, the guys all still amped up on post-show adrenaline and wanting to continue on their highs for the night. 

“Where are we headed, guys?” Mia asks as she sits herself down on the couch.

“Ah, me Jake and Ty found a quiet little place earlier today, it was tiny and tucked away, we could go back there?” Josh speaks up, still clad in his shiny jumpsuit. You try your best to tune them out, pressing play on your phone to listen to whatever music was playing on your singular earbud. 

“Doooooo they have… cheap beer?” Sam sings. 

“I don't know about cheap, but they have beer…” Ty replies through a laugh. 

“Perfect!” Sam yells as he stands from his seat. “Let us go!”

You notice how quiet Jake has stayed, a switch from his normal partaking in the rambunctiousness of post-show excitement with his brothers. You hear them all begin to get themselves together and file out. You know one of them is going to ask if you’re coming along, they always do. So you muster up the courage to make a decision, when all you really want to do is retreat back to your hotel room bed for the night. 

But no. You know what?

“Y/N! You coming?” you hear Ty’s voice bellow over the group. You turn and catch his eyes as you watch him wink at you. He nods his head in a ‘come on’ motion. Ty always knows.

Out of the corner of your eye you see Jake pause, waiting for your answer. 

“Yeah, I could use a drink tonight!” you say. “I’ll finish up here and be right behind you. Send me the address?”

“Sure thing, see you in a bit,” Ty responds. “It’s literally right around the corner.”

—--

You saunter confidently into the pub, finding your whole group to have taken up the majority of the place, it’s so small. Just like always, your eyes immediately click with Jake’s first, and when he doesn’t break the contact, you pull yourself away, latching on to Ty and Josh at the other end of the bar. 

Just like in the green room, the air is heavy and hazy and loud, everyone still riding their highs and letting the drinks flow. You decide on something a little heavier tonight, knowing that you abso-fucking-lutely deserve it after the day you’d endured. 

You catch sight of Murph posted in a corner booth, chewing on a toothpick as his head stays on a swivel. He catches you looking, giving you a tiny smile before letting his eyes scan the room again. 

You make yourself at home on a barstool, and just before lifting a round of shots into the air with Ty and Josh, you feel Jake’s presence behind you again, interrupting you. You meet him with a questioning look, obviously perturbed at the feeling of his hand on your back as you try to celebrate with his twin. 

“Go ahead,” he concedes, motioning for you to take the shot. So you do, never looking away from him as you let the liquor flow down your throat, urging yourself to not make a face as you swallow it down. 

“Can I help you with something?” you ask, your voice sounding a little more vengeful than you’d meant to. The liquor is definitely already working. His face pulls back, shocked at your words. He almost looks hurt. 

“Shit, I guess not…” he says. “I’ve just been–”

“Jake! Come here!” you hear Danny yell from a few tables away. “Hurry!”

Jake looks at Danny and back at you, and you raise your eyebrows toward him, urging him to go on. You can’t talk here. Not in this environment. And honestly, you’re having way too much fun getting drunk and ignoring him while you steal passing glances with Murph from across the room. 

After a little while, Murph comes and sits at the barstool beside you, talking to Josh while you sit between them. They’re discussing something work-related, but Murph is purposefully leaning in to you, his toned torso brushing heavily into your shoulder. You’re not really listening to them, as your mind has gone absolutely fuzzy at the feeling of him touching you. What the fuckkkkkk. The tequila lining your veins most definitely isn’t helping the fact that you are wholeheartedly loving this, knowing that Jake is standing three feet away, watching it all unfold. And the best part is, you’re locked into your bar stool, unable to get up if you wanted to. They’ve caged you in. 

“Isn’t that right, Y/N?” you hear Murph’s silky smooth drawl interrupt your thoughts. 

“What? What?” you perk up. 

“The twenty cases of water we loaded will most likely be gone in a week and a half, yeah?” he says, rolling the toothpick between his teeth as his eyes stay bouncing around the room. 

“Oh! Yeah, actually, probably so, with the way the crew drinks it,” you agree, not really caring about the subject as Josh laughs it off. 

“Murph, you know you’re horrible at paying attention to conversations?” you say without a shadow of a filter. 

“What?” he asks through a smile. 

“Your eyes. You never stop looking around. You hardly ever look someone in the eye when they’re talking to you…” you go on explaining. Josh has now abandoned the conversation, turning back to Ty. 

You feel Murph lean in even closer to you, his mouth only inches from your ear. “I’m trained to watch, Y/N. Trained to always be aware, all of the time. But, I can assure you, when I’m not on the job, my attention is 100% focused on who I’m spending my time with.”

His words make your stomach swirl. “Mmm, I’d have to see it to believe it.”

He pulls back, his neck still twisting right to left to right again. “Maybe you will sometime.”

Just then, you feel your phone buzz in your lap, and you lift it to see a notification through the blurriness of your intoxicated vision. 

‘Jake Added A Song to Your Shared Playlist: 🐥’

Your stomach drops as you know he is watching you see the notification. You open the playlist, scrolling to the bottom to see what in the hell he could have added right now. 

Of course, ‘Don’t Let Me Down’ by the Beatles. 

You scoff, feeling like if anyone is being let down, it’s you. You let your phone fall back into your lap before turning your attention back to your drink and to your conversation with Murph. You know Jake is watching, still, and you know that seeing you ignore him was only pissing him off more. 

And for some reason, it gets you hot. 

Stop it, Y/N, fuck. The horrid and ridiculous thoughts of Jake being jealous of you and the man sitting beside you has your stomach in excited knots, and you know it’s just the alcohol, but you’d be lying if you said it didn’t absolutely turn you on, similarly to what had happened last night. 

You feel the energy in the room shift as everyone begins to make moves to leave. You feel a little sad, realizing that your intoxication has only just hit its peak. “Aw, we leaving already?” you ask no one in particular. 

“Looks that way…” Murph says as he stands from his stool. You catch sight of Jake sticking close to Josh and Danny as they make their way to the exit. 

“Murph, my friend, why don’t you take the rest of the night off?” Dean says as he comes up behind you, laying a hand on Murph’s shoulder. “Monty and Sasha and I have got this, not a far walk back.”

“Oh, no no, it’s okay. I’m good…” he argues. 

“Ah, come on, Murph! Stayyyyyy…” you beg playfully, giving him yearning eyes. But they were for good reason, you want him to stay. 

“You’ve had a long day, kid. Rest of us relaxed while you loaded water. Stay. Have a beer or three…” Dean gives him no choice as he makes a quick exit, ushering the rest of the group out the door. Jake never even turns around. 

“Well! Uh, that’s never happened before!” Murph says as he anxiously rubs his hands over his pants. “Guess uh, guess I’m off the clock?”

“Ha, ha! Guess you are!” you say confidently, sipping from your skinny straw. “Sir, this gentleman will have your largest pils,” you motion to the bartender, earning a nod. 

“Oh, you ordering for me now?” Murph laughs, turning sideways in his stool to face you.

“Yeah, got a problem?” you say, bumping your shoulder into him and feeling more confident now that you aren’t under the watchful eye of everyone else. 

The bartender sets the beer on a coaster in front of Murph, and he reaches for a salt shaker, sprinkling a little onto the foamy head of the draft. “Nah, no problem at all, ma’am.”

“Ma’am?!” you exclaim. “Aren’t I a little young to be referred to as that?” you ask. 

He shakes his head as he takes a drink. “No, where I’m from, everyone of equal age or older is referred to as ma’am, or sir. ‘S just how I was raised, not meant to be offensive.”

“Oh,” you say, still surprised. “Of equal age, how do you know how old I am?” you press. 

He sets his beer down, rubbing his hands against each other. You catch sight of his calloused palms and gritted fingernails, being instantly attracted that he works with his hands. “Well, I know you’re over twenty-three, twenty-four because, obviously, you have no problem holding your liquor… you’re not over thirty-five, because you just called a beer a Pils. You have experience in your profession and you hold yourself well, and you got really excited and knew all the words when that Nickelback song randomly came on the radio in the truck this morning.”

Oh, my god? He… pays attention…

“Sooo…” you mutter. 

“So, I’m going to guess… twenty-six.”

Your jaw falls open. “Holy shit.”

He smiles smugly as he takes a large drink of his beer, reaching his hand up to pat himself on the back. 

“How did you do that?” you ask, stunned. 

He shrugs. “It’s a gift, I’m also trained to read people.” He leans in, giving you a playfully suspicious glare. 

“Okay, so read something else,” you urge, sitting up taller in your seat. 

You feel the skin on your chest turn red as you try to hold your confidence. He takes a deep breath, scanning his eyes all over you. “Something is bothering you tonight. You don’t normally drink tequila, only when you’re trying to forget about something, distract yourself. You keep checking your phone but you’re keeping it face-down, so you don’t get caught off guard by a notification. You’re choosing when you let yourself look at it, telling me you like to be in control of situations.  And, if I had to guess, what’s bothering you has something to do with that important call you missed this morning.”

Holy shit…again. What the…

“Alright, alright, you can stop now,” you wave him off, turning away and sipping from your straw again. 

You hear him laugh through his nose. “Told you, it’s a gift.”

“Yeah well, you– you’re too good,” you bark. 

His hand gently sits on your arm, the warmth emanating off his palm. “Hey, just forget about it, whatever it is. We’re here to have some fun, huh?”

His words are friendly and reassuring as you feel that same swirl erupt in your stomach again. “Yeah, you’re right,” you concede. “Fun. Actually, ever since they left, your eyes haven’t scanned the room even once.”

He blushes. “I can relax, Y/N, if given the opportunity.” His eyes fall to your lips, and you watch as he sucks in a tight breath, feeling no embarrassment that you caught him in the act. You reach your tongue to swipe across your bottom lip, taking the entirety of him in with your eyes, too. Suddenly visions of you and Jake last night come flying back into your memory, but you push them away, knowing that it’s only your subconscious telling you you’re about to make a rash decision. But you go against your gut, knowing that you had given Jake more than enough chances to make things right. And he had taken exactly zero of them. 

You place a hand on the edge of your stool, leaning in closer to him. “Are you enjoying your opportunity?” you whisper. 

You feel the unfamiliar but welcome graze of his light touch on your thigh, his hand barely ghosting up from your knee. “Very, very much so…”

There’s a heavy pause in the conversation as the two of you inch in closer, so close that you can feel his exhales hitting your lips. His eyes are darting quickly across your face as you feel his breathing pick up a little, the warmth of his body physically pouring itself on to you. Your heart is beating so fast you can hardly stand it, and the anticipation of his proximity is making you more dizzy than the tequila did. 

You breathe in heavily through your nose, the smell of his cologne finally making sense in your mind. Pine. He smells like pine.

As your lips barely ghost his, a zap of electricity courses through your body, and Jake is the absolute furthest thing from your mind. All you can think about is Murph. All you can feel is him, he’s surrounding you, clouding up your mind entirely…

His breath hitches at the tiniest bit of contact that’s made and you take a second to press into him a little further. 

“Murph…” you whisper against him. “What’s your real name?”

You can tell he’s holding himself back, letting you be the one to make the attempt to finally connect the two of you. Your eyes flutter closed as your ears go almost completely deaf, taking in the feeling of the softness of his lips as they smile sweetly against yours. 

“Ezra… Ezra Murphy,” he breathes. 

“Ezra…” you repeat, kissing into his mouth with the utmost caution while letting all of your insecurities tumble down around you. Suddenly there’s no sound, there’s no light, there’s no air left in your lungs… just him, only him, and the tightness of his hand on your thigh as he kisses you back. You lean into him, opening your mouth just a little bit more to let him in. His thick mustache is rough on your skin, but you couldn’t care less. You feel his tongue barely press through before pulling back again… the tiny breaths going in and out through his nose only adding to the sweet taste of him. His other hand finds your cheek, his thumb drifting across your chin as his fingertips gently grip at your skull. Fuck, he feels good… he feels really, really fucking good…

You exhale hard as you disconnect the fairly quick kiss, a stunned and surprised look of intrigue taking over both your haughty expressions. “Wow…” you mutter. 

“Yeah, wow…” he parrots. “I’ve wanted to do that all night…”

“Uh-uhm…” you hear someone behind him clear their throat. You both disconnect contact as you turn around, finding none other than Josh holding his credit card between his two fingers, tapping its edge on the bar. “Sorry to uh, interrupt…” he says, forcing a fake smile. “Forgot my card.”

Fuck. Shiiiiiit. Oh fuck fuck fuck.

“Oh, no big deal, man. You uh, you need me to walk you back?” Murph collects himself, turning directly back into work mode. 

“No no, stay here. Monty’s outside,” Josh responds, looking directly at you. “You two enjoy the rest of your evening.”

Josh walks away and disappears through the door as you’re left completely stunned, unable to form a thought. Murph spins back around to face you, a little bit taken aback himself. “That was kinda awkward…” he laughs. 

“You think?” you try to laugh along, all the while feeling an overwhelming wave of emotions. 

Embarrassed, confused, pissed, turned on…

“Um. You uh, you ready to go back?” Murph asks, wiping his fingers across his lips as he throws some money down onto the bar. 

“Think that’s probably best,” you agree, standing to grab your jacket off the back of the stool. 

As you and Murph walk silently back to the hotel, the alcohol hits you a little differently, adding heavier emotions than you could bear to carry. You want to reach out and grab his hand, let him steady you as you stumble your way back home, but you know that’s not in your best interest, right now. He gives you tiny smiles and offers to open the lobby doors, letting you walk inside before him to the elevator doors. 

You both climb inside as the doors close behind you. “You want me to walk you the rest of the way up?” he asks, knowing he is getting off a few floors before you. 

You lean your back against the wall of the elevator, crossing your arms across your chest. “No, I’ll be okay. Thank you, though.” Your voice feels heavier as the elevator ascends. 

Finally, the elevator stops and the doors open to his floor. “Wait, Murph…” you stop him. He turns back to face you, his hand stopping the doors from closing. “I uh, I had fun with you, tonight.”

His lips curl up into a small smile. “Me too, Y/N. Thanks for helping me relax, I’m actually a little sad it got cut short…” he says.

“Me, too,” you agree with a nod, and he steps back from the sliding doors, offering you a wave of goodnight before the doors enclose you and your thoughts completely.

As you walk back into your hotel room ready to strip down and let the warmth of the covers envelop you again, you somehow wish you could take it all back. Wish you would have never been seated next to Jake on that very first flight. Wish you would have never followed him into that random bar bathroom…

Your mind is so fuzzed up it almost feels blank. You like Jake, you really do. But the longer he waits to tell you the truth, the more resentment you hold toward him. The last thing you want to be is someone who destroys a home. The shame you feel for even texting him last night is one of the heaviest you’ve ever felt in your life. 

And Murph, his protection… blissfully unaware of the entire situation at all, being a gentleman and treating you with open kindness. Fuck. It’s all so fucked. 

You’re feeling your eyelids start to droop as you hear your phone buzz beside you, the light blinking you awake. 

It’s not a text, though…it’s an instagram notification. 

There in the center of your screen is a request from Jake’s partner herself. 

Ms. Isla J. Whitman would like to be your friend. 

Isla…

.

.

.

.

.

.

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[sihtricfedaraaahvicius]

Shooting a Movie

Note: I have nothing to say for myself. shoutout to @foxyanon for letting me ramble about this fic to her as I made it up.

Warnings: 18+!! smut/pwp. reader and Masema are pornstars, what else do I need to say? All the clichés are there.

pairing: Modern!Masema x you (f)

summary: Before shooting an adult film with Masema, he wanted to meet you for a chemistry check. And a test ride.

wordcount: 3,1k

Masterlist

Working with Masema was like a dream come true. Everyone knew he was simply the hottest guy in the porn industry and everyone wanted to work with him. But Masema was picky with who he worked with, being able to have that privilege, so you couldn't believe it when you heard he wanted to make a movie with you and therefore invited you over to his house 'to see if the chemistry is there,' as his email had said.

You were an up and coming name in the business, being the shy and innocent looking bombshell everyone wants to be or wants to be with, and Masema was interested in working with you because he knew for a fact he could corrupt a little delicate and shy thing such as yourself. He knew he could make you shed that innocence and pull out a wild and filthy side of you that you hadn't discovered yet. There was nothing wrong with making soft porn, as you did, but he wanted to make a mess out of you and he was determined to do so. But first he wanted to meet you, because no matter how beautiful you were; if there was no real chemistry, Masema didn't want it.

Masema's house was big, kind of what you'd expect from a guy with his profession who made a lot of money just because of the way he looked. And he did well for himself, very well. 

Masema greeted you at the door, dressed in tight grey jeans that showed off the shape of his legs and he wore a black sleeveless shirt on top, immediately impressing you with the size of his biceps. You weakened at the thought of how easily this man could pick you up with just one arm and throw you around, only to use you as his toy, and you would let him use you the way he pleased, no questions asked. His hair was tied back, sporting his signature top knot cut, and his mismatched eyes were even prettier in real life than you could've imagined. His voice was low and smooth each time he spoke, so honeyed and warm that you knew from the get go you would do everything he'd tell you to do, on and off camera. His smile was flirty and it became clear within seconds that he's quite touchy, as he constantly brushed his fingers over your bare arms and lightly touched your lower back as he guided you through his massive house and into his backyard, where you both sat back on his luxurious loungeset, overlooking his pool with sparkling clear water, and he offered you something to drink to break the ice.

Masema sat close to you, manspreading and with his arms spread out across the sofa's backrest. His eyes were now hidden behind his dark shades as they trailed up from your bare legs to your face while you enjoyed your drink, and he very much enjoyed the sight of you in those cute white hot pants and white cropped shirt on top. As always so innocent and cute looking, he simply loved it because he couldn't wait to break you.

'So,' he said, his voice barely above a murmur, 'I'm actually surprised you wanted to work with me.'

'And why is that?' you smiled.

'I've seen your movies,' Masema replied and licked his lips, 'and we're quite the opposite, aren't we, doll?' he tilted his head to the side with a half smile as he looked at you.

'Oh, well, yes,' you chuckled, 'I know I'm more in the soft porn category, whereas you are, you know,' you cleared your throat and shrugged lightly.

'Hardcore,' Masema added, 'yes. So, how did you envision this then, sweetheart? Because surely no one wants me to make a soft movie.'

'No, I know,' you said quickly, 'that's also not what I am expecting. But I thought maybe we could somehow combine the two.'

Masema hummed and looked out over his pool, as if he was pondering over your idea. And after a moment of long silence he looked back at you and smiled faintly.

'So, what do you have in mind?' he asked.

'I thought we could just start of slow, some touching and kissing-'

'I don't kiss in my movies, darling,' Masema interrupted, but he then paused and lowered his head slightly so he could look into your eyes over the rim of his glasses, 'but if you can make me want to kiss you,' he said, 'then you'd have a first time thing with me that would surely draw attention,' he winked.

'I can make you,' you purred as you leaned in closer, 'trust me.'

Masema watched how you lightly trailed your fingers up his thighs, and he wetted his smirking lips with the tip of his tongue. He wouldn't hand it to you that easily, but you were right. He wouldn't mind kissing you at all, even though that was always a hard no for him with everyone else. But he wasn't going to give in this fast, he would first just enjoy seeing you work for it and what you were capable of without being on set and having directors tell you what to do and what to say.

'Quite a statement,' he smiled and placed his big hand on your thigh.

'I know what I'm capable of,' you said with a cocky grin, your hand slowly moving up to his inner thigh.

You then began to rub his bulge through his pants, knowing exactly that the only reason you were invited was to show him what you were capable of, and you would make sure to give him exactly what he wanted in order to get that movie made as it would surely boost your career. Masema looked at you through his sunglasses, keeping his unphased posture while he wanted nothing more than to rip your clothes off and fuck you until you couldn't remember your own name anymore, which is what he'd usually do, but he'd play by your rules for once now and sit it out.

He lightly traced your bare shoulder with his fingers while you continued to palm his trapped erection, and he felt a little lightheaded when you suddenly got up and stood in front of him. He watched you in silence as you slowly took off your cropped shirt and then sat down, straddling his lap. You placed your hands on his broad shoulders and teasingly grinded down onto him while you leaned in closer.

'So fucking hard already,' you purred as your noses touched lightly.

Masema hummed in response, his arms still spread while he enjoyed the friction you gave him, even if it was nowhere near enough.

'Can't wait to put you in my mouth and suck you dry, big boy,' you chuckled, to which Masema flashed a sly smile.

He then took your chin, firmly holding it with just three fingers while he nuzzled your nose briefly.

'And I can't wait to see your tears run down your cute little face while you choke on it,' he husked.

You sat back and laughed softly, that cheeky little laugh you always did in your movies, Masema had heard it before. But it was a little different this time, he could tell that this time it was genuine. And in response to that he suddenly grabbed your throat, pleasantly tight as he was squeezing, and he pulled you back to him to crash his lips onto yours, making it the sloppiest and hottest kiss you had ever received and it left your head spinning once he pulled away.

You then smoothly dropped to your knees while you were still recovering from the unexpected kiss. You were quick to unbutton his jeans while Masema just looked down at you, his lower lip drawn between his teeth and his head slightly tilted to the side. You pulled out his hard length, which was throbbing and you felt every vein as you gave his thick cock a few firm strokes. He was even thicker and longer than you anticipated.

You looked up at him as you dragged the tip of your tongue up from the base of his cock to his tip, which you teased with your tongue while he still sat back with his arms stretched out over the couch. He smiled faintly at you before he brought one hand up to the back of your head.

'That's it,' he said with a soft hum, 'wrap your pretty lips around my cock,' he then took off his shades, 'and look into my eyes while you suck me off.'

Your eyes remained locked intensely as you enthusiastically began to bop your head, while he gradually pushed your head down further, shoving his cock all the way down your throat until you gagged and your eyes teared up. You pulled away when he released his grip on your head, and he took your chin as you gasped for a moment of air.

'Already too much?' he smirked.

'No,' you smiled and wiped your mouth, drool and precum already coating your lips and chin.

'Good,' Masema murmured and stroked your cheek with the back of his hand, 'tell me, beautiful, have you been slapped before?'

'No,' you almost giggled and gave him a daring look as you worked him with your hands.

Masema understood your gaze, and he then suddenly slapped your cheek, causing you to gasp and half moan with excitement before your cheeky laughter sounded again as you looked back into his eyes, hungry for more.

'Hm, you like that, don't you?' he asked and gently caressed your reddening cheek.

'Yes,' you smiled with hooded eyes while tears of pleasure slowly escaped and rolled down your face.

Masema hummed with a satisfied smile and slapped you again, then immediately took your face firmly as he leaned in.

'I'm going to corrupt you,' he said softly with his warm and raspy voice, 'I'll turn you into the dirty slut that you are.'

You bit down on your lip as you nodded and smiled, your eyes darting up and down between his deliciously twitching cock and his beautiful mismatched eyes.

'You want my cock?' he purred, seeing the hunger and need in your eyes.

'Yes, please,' you said desperately, 'I want to suck your big and pretty cock.'

'I know you do,' Masema murmured, 'you're practically drooling all over it, aren't you?' he teasingly slapped the tip of his cock against your parted lips while your eyes pleaded for more.

'Please,' you begged, then opened your mouth and stuck out your tongue as Masema stood up and towered over you.

He leaned in and took your chin firmly again to kiss you.

'So pretty when you beg for me,' he husked and teased your watering mouth again with his cock, giving you only the tip before he pulled away again, 'so pretty on your knees for me.'

You smiled and squeezed your thighs together in search of relief as you watched him stroke his cock above your face. Masema slid his fingers in your hair, clenching a fistful to keep you in place and then shoved his whole length down your throat again. He exhaled sharp with pleasure and threw his head back, and he continued to fuck your mouth with a steady pace until he felt his climax was slowly approaching and the tears rolled down your face. He pulled out before he came at the sight of the mess you were, and he told you to take off your pants. You obeyed, but in return you told him to take off his shirt, to which he grinned and listened. You were then completely exposed, standing in front of Masema while he teasingly slowly slid down his boxers after he had taken off his jeans.

You admired his body; his toned biceps and muscular chest were to die for, his broad shoulders were perfect to hold onto, and his abs were simply an invitation to drag your tongue across. His thighs were muscular too and perfect to get off on if he wouldn't allow you the joy of getting fucked by him, but luckily he wasn't going to deny you that pleasure. 

He picked you up with ease and threw you onto the comfortable bean bag next to the pool and, instead of getting straight to the point like he usually does, he granted you some of the soft porn sensuality you were used to and he slowly kissed his way from your ankle to your inner thighs. He then locked your hips with his arms as he kissed your soaked folds, before delving his tongue right in and pleasing you orally just the way you had done for him. He used his tongue and fucked you with his fingers until he felt your walls clench around his digits. He then pulled away, not allowing you your high yet, and before you could whine at the loss he had you already picked up in his strong arms again, and he slid his thick cock inside you with ease, stretching and filling you completely. He pounded your pussy without mercy, his hands holding your thighs bruisingly while you desperately clung onto his shoulders and kept your legs wrapped around his waist.

You both began to moan at the feeling, but before it became too much he pulled out again and quickly bended you over the table nearby, taking you from behind and causing your moans to become out of control while he ravaged you perfectly. He held your wrists with one hand, keeping your arms behind your back while his other hand was between your shoulders, keeping you pressed down on the table while he had his way with you.

'Nice and tight,' Masema moaned and laughed, 'fuck, your pussy feels so fucking good.'

'Ahh, fuck,' you moaned with ragged breaths, 'more, please,' you begged and squirmed when he suddenly pulled out.

You moaned in protest, but then he unexpectedly shoved his cock fully back inside you again rather slowly, which made you whine with pleasure and was the reason for your eyes to roll back and your mouth to fall open with a smile curled on your lips.

'Harder,' you begged with a whisper.

'Look at you,' Masema said with a mocking tone as he pulled out slowly again, 'begging to be fucked harder,' he grabbed your hair and made you look up at him while he leaned in from behind, 'is that what cute and innocent girls do, hm?'

Before you could respond he slammed back into you again, and he felt you immediately clench around him while you squealed and screamed out in absolute pleasure.

'Oh, you're my favourite,' he grunted, repeating the movement again and again, 'so easy to corrupt. I'm going to enjoy having my way with you, doll,' he laughed and pulled out again, then easily picked you up once more and threw you over his shoulder.

He slapped your ass hard, to which you gasped and laughed as he manhandled you with ease, and you loved every second of it. He took you back to the loungeset, where he sat down and pulled you in his lap so he could fuck you from underneath. Your head was resting back on his shoulder while he fucked you out of your mind, hearing his low and ragged breathing in your ear while you felt his hand around your throat and his other on your waist. You could only mumble incoherently and moan loudly as he fucked into you deeply, his balls violently slamming against your pussy with each thrust, driving you both nearly to the edge. 

He then swiftly swapped places and pinned your knees next to your head so he could fuck you even deeper while he looked down into your eyes. He fucked you like that until your legs were shaking and your moans sounded with a faint tremble as you both watched his cock slide in and out of you.

'Fuck,' you whined and looked back up into his eyes, only being able to murmur your words while you were simply cock drunk, 'ahh, fuck, you're so good. So fucking good,' you half drooled, 'I love your cock,' you laughed cheekily again, 'hm, I love your big fucking cock inside of me.'

'Yeah,' he husked and grabbed your throat, 'you dirty slut,' he laughed, 'you don't like to be fucked only soft, do you?'

'No,' you babbled as you struggled to keep your eyes open, feeling him bruisingly deep inside you.

'Taking me so well,' Masema rasped, 'I've never seen you this fucked out before,' he smiled, 'you just needed a real man to fuck you stupid like this, didn't you?'

'Mhm,' you hummed and moaned as you felt your core tighten abruptly.

And before you could even try to stop it, you felt your release coming in heavy waves with loud moans as you clawed at his back. Masema climaxed quickly after you, with a heavy groan, and he took your face to look at you while he slowly fucked you through both your highs.

'That's it,' he cooed, 'good girl, so beautiful,' he smiled a little dazed and kissed your lips gently.

'Oh, fuck,' you sighed, satisfied, 'fuck,' you said again and laughed before you kissed him, 'fuck, I think I'm in love with you,' you murmured against his lips.

Masema chuckled and shook his head as he stilled inside you.

'That's what they all say once I'm done with them,' he said and pulled out of you.

He helped you sit back gently and then gathered your clothes and gave them to you before he was fast to slip his own boxers on again.

'You can use the bathroom upstairs to clean up,' Masema said, 'second door on the left.'

You thanked him and went to clean up, needing a moment to yourself to gather some strength again. But still, your legs felt unsteady once you walked down the marble stairs and returned to the Masema's backyard, where he sat back on one of the lounge chairs with his shades on again.

'You good?' he asked.

'Yeah, you smiled, 'I should get going.'

'Sure, let me walk you out then.'

Masema walked you to his door and told you to have your manager hit up his manager, so a date and location to shoot an actual movie could be arranged, to which you happily agreed.

'Thanks for the good time,' he said and kissed your cheek, 'I'll see you soon, yeah?'

'For sure,' you smiled and felt yourself blush lightly, 'you'll see me soon.'

'Should be a good time again,' Masema said and winked, then checked out your ass while you walked as steady as you could to your car, so you could drive home and arrange the shoot.

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[leilani-lily]

~Oh Deer~ (Chapter 10)

The giant chapter won by a landslide 𓁹‿𓁹

9k later. Absolutely wild to me, but here we are (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)

I guess it's fitting as we just hit chapter 10!! Double digits lets gooooo~! ৻( •̀ ᗜ •́ ৻)

And this also concludes the "Black Market" storyline, so that feels like a good enough reason for this chapter to be super DUPER long >ᴗ<

Also huge thank you to everyone who's been leaving such lovely comments for me ;;w;; I read every single one and try to respond every time (I'm actually behind on a few so if you're waiting I apologize! I'll address them tonight!!) But keep 'em coming if you can! I adore getting anything, even if it's just a single emoji or one word ꨄ

Alright, enough chatter. Let's get into the nitty gritty >ω>

SYNOPSIS: AroAce! Alastor x Chef!Singer! Reader. You are fully pampered by your deer friend after a harrowing adventure... Word Count: 9k

Chapter under the cut! ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The first thing your murky mind picked up on was soft clattering.

Eyelids as heavy as led, you had a hard time opening your eyes; so you opted to keep them shut as you could feel your mind slowly coming back to consciousness. 

The next thing you picked up was a mix of smells. There was something in the air that had a chemical like scent, strong and potent that made your nose wrinkle. But there was something else behind the strong synthetic smell. Something like rain, earth, and nature; crisp and clean and oh so soothing.

The final thing you noticed was feeling as if you were laying on a cloud. Your fingers twitched back to life, and the silky satin that practically slipped through your touch had caught you off guard. And whatever pillow your head was resting on was plump and soft, cradling your skull so tenderly. 

You laid there in pure bliss for a moment, you mind still groggy from such a deep sleep and just happy to be somewhere that felt so comfy. But as you felt your head sink even further into the bed, a thought crossed your mind.

You didn’t own silk sheets.

Eyes still closed, your brows furrowed.

Your room didn’t smell like this.

You slowly force your eyes open, the world around you still a blur as your eyes adjust. As your body shuffled under the buttery sheets, another scent rose from the pillows and entered your senses. It was something you were so familiar with, and yet, in that moment you couldn’t pin it down. The smell of bourbon, coffee and cedarwood. It took a moment for your dull mind to connect the dots, but eventually you could feel your eyes widen when it finally hit you.

“Comfortable, my dear~?”

And speak of the devil.

You scramble to sit up, but your body immediately screamed in protest, chest aching and limbs sore. You audibly gasped in agony, not understanding why your body was in such excruciating pain. Your head began to swim, and you could feel your upper body swaying precariously. Before your torso even had the chance to fall back, you heard the shuffle of static as clawed hands reached out and caught you, one around your back and one cradling your head. Too absorbed in the pain, you didn’t even notice the long tendrils of shadows behind you, stacking and fluffing up the pillows against the headboard. 

“Careful, little songbird,” Alastor softly scolded. A deep chuckle accompanied his next line, “It’s not quite time for you to leave the nest~”

You let out a pathetic whimper of despair as you felt yourself being slowly lowered, but this time your upper body felt more elevated on the bed below you, allowing you to have a better view of your surroundings. Finally adjusted back to the mattress, Alastors arms slipped out from underneath you, and for a brief moment, as his warmth slipped away, you wished that he hadn’t. 

God, why was your body aching like this? Why was your head pounding against your skull? Even more so, what was this burning sensation you felt all over your chest? You run a weary hand over your face and flinch back as your fingers traced over your cheek, hissing at the tenderness. 

And then it all came flooding back.

A large paw backhanding you, being pinned down and gasping for air, dragged against the harsh pavement and tearing your skin open.

And worst of all. That horrifying image of silver claws slashing your chest.

Your mind reeled with the rush of memories and everything that had happened, like some harrowing nightmare you had just woken up to. But you knew it was all real, you could feel it with every bruise, scrape, and sore muscle. You look down to your hands and shudder upon seeing them still stained red with blood. Most likely a mix of your own and that Dobermans.

Fuzzy memories flashed before your eyes; the sound of his screams, the glimmer of your hair pin, the adrenaline pumping through your heart. You honestly didn’t remember much after seeing the skinny HellHound step out from the shadows with his gun. But you knew in your heart what had happened; what you had done. Something so horrific, you had vowed never to do it again.

But they were going to kill you, amongst other things to you… And they were going to kill Alastor. 

You couldn’t live with yourself if you had let him get hurt.

You attempted to take a grounding breath of air, this flood of horrible memories making you lightheaded, but winced as your lungs attempted to expand. Your chest felt tight and heavy, like you were being constricted. You feared to look down; look at the mess that was left behind after the battle. But you had to know what you were dealing with. So with some hesitation, you finally lift the silk sheet and peek down at your body. 

The first thing you noticed was three long gashes stretched across your torso from the bottom of your stomach to the top of your collarbone. But to your relief, they seemed to be already sewn shut, little stitches of what appeared to be neon green thread closing your deep wounds, the blood already cleaned off of sanitized skin. 

But the second thing…

Your eyes widened to dinner plates upon realizing you were practically naked in Alastor’s bed, save for your underwear… Which wasn’t the same pair you were wearing earlier. 

A choked cough escaped your lungs, suddenly scrambling to pull the sheets tight around your bare body and your cheeks burning red. Alastor, who had been shuffling around in the first aid kit beside him, didn’t move a muscle, but his eyes lazily drifted back up to you. You looked back at him, mortified, and to this Alastor simply cocked an eyebrow. You tried to take a deep, calming breath.

“Alastor…” you warned, “Where the fuck are my clothes?”

The deer demon sitting by his bed blinked for a moment, his eyes eventually going back to his previous task. Though his eyebrows furrowed as he replied with a tight smile. 

“Hm. Not even a thank you for the craftsmanship I did? Those stitches are some of my best work…”

“ALASTOR.”

“Oh please, y/n, do be rational.” Alastor huffed, cocking an eyebrow at you. “All of your garments were in ruin; they had to be disposed of. Besides,” he gestured his hand to your torso, “I needed access to stitch your wounds to prevent further blood loss. Would you have preferred that I let you bleed out?”

You both stared at each other for a good minute before it all became too much. You groaned in embarrassment, bringing the sheets up to cover your face and secretly wanting the bed to swallow you whole. You knew deep down he was right; as always. And you truly were grateful for his care. But still… You imagined him working over you, your chest bare and exposed as his hands brushed up against your skin, fingers dangerously close and skillfully sewing.

Your heart jumped into your throat as you once again whined in defeat, fully bringing the blanket over your head and vowing never to leave your fortress. You heard a mix of a sigh and a chuckle from beyond the sheets, static shuffling in the background. 

“Such dramatics. Makes me think you’ve been taking lessons from our Arachnid fellow~”

A clawed hand grasped the top of the blanket, and after meeting some resistance from you, pulled it down so only your head was visible again, your hair now slightly disheveled. Alastor's expression had softened from annoyed to calm as he shook his head at you.

“I can assure you,” he mused, “that you should not worry over such things. I do not perceive people in such a way. The body is simply a machine of flesh and bone to fulfill the duties of the mind, nothing more.” He placed a hand on your cloth-covered knee, making you peek up at him tentatively, “You can trust me on that my dear.”

You could tell how sincere he was about this, his eyes never left yours as he spoke. And of course, you knew he would never put himself in this kind of situationship unless it was absolutely necessary. He was too much of a true gentleman. You could feel your heartbeat start to calm after his reassurance, and you give a little embarrassed nod to acknowledge him. 

Nevertheless, you still felt a bit too exposed sitting here in just your panties, and only a thin sheet of silk to cover you. 

“... I want a shirt at least.” you mumbled, looking down to avoid his gaze. Alastor straightened up in his chair and blinked.

“I don’t see the point my dear…” he said blankly, eye twitching. “I’ve already seen everything. Besides, you are already covered enough to-!”

“I know, I know,” you sighed, trying to hold back your own irritation. “I would just feel better if I had an extra layer. Please.”

The Overlord glared at you a moment longer before sighing and rising to his feet. He promptly began to unbutton his jacket, making your face fall open like a deer in the headlights. Before you could accuse him of anything, he rolled the blazer off his shoulders and flung it at your head. His smell laced in his jacket immediately overtook your senses, and you had to hold back the urge to bury your face in it. You didn’t dare to pull it down past your cheeks; you didn’t want him seeing just how red you were underneath.

Alastor stood before you in a red vest adorning the similar pinstripes that were on his jacket, his vest hugging his frame perfectly as if tailored just for his torso. The demon’s smile was tight and sharp, clearly annoyed as his ears flattened against his head and he straightened his undershirt. The long sleeved blouse was a crisp white, flaring out ever so slightly near his elbows and wrists. You were so grateful to be hiding behind his jacket at this very moment. You had never seen Alastor without his blazer on, so this was all very new to you. Soon enough his head turned back to you, and you immediately averted your gaze back to his face; heaven forbid he caught you gawking. 

He placed his hands on his hips, looking at you expectantly with a cocked eyebrow and smile tense. You could feel yourself begin to sweat under his deep gaze and eventually dropped your own.

“T-turn around…” you mumble, you grip on his jacket tightening. You heard the sound of a microphone screeching. 

“Of all the-” Alastor sighed heavily, his tone clearly beyond annoyed, “I’ve already seen-!”

“GOD DAMNIT ALASTOR JUST DO IT!!”

You didn’t even realize what you had done until you heard a soft ‘fwump’ sound from across the room. Alastors static waves immediately hushed, and you instantly knew you had fucked up. You lowered your outstretched arm and immediately hid under his blanket and jacket, not even daring to look up. 

Cause you knew, if you did, you’d find one of his pillows that you threw at him had comically flattened over Alastor’s face, eventually flopping to the ground with a final ‘womph’.

You couldn’t tell what was happening outside of your little fortress; the silence was practically deafening. But eventually, you saw the lights flicker as radio waves shuffled through the air sharply. You could feel the hair on the back of your neck stand up at the sudden increase of electricity buzzing through the air. The bed was practically vibrating. But after a period of time, the lights stopped flickering, and the radio buzzing became dull and back to its usual tone. Still too chickenshit to emerge, you heard him stomp around the bed with some soft clattering. 

“I am going to get some hot water to clean your wounds,” you heard him growl, “Do not, by any means, put my jacket on fully. I still need access to your arms.” You heard more shuffling, and soon his footsteps pound away and towards the bathroom door. 

“Simply drape it over your body, since heaven forbid I catch another glimpse at your naked form.” his last sentence was dripping with sarcasm. 

And even though you were beyond embarrassed, you couldn’t help the nervous snort escape your lips at his tone. He was so done with your bullshit, and honestly, you couldn’t blame him. You knew you were being ridiculous at this point given there really was no point in covering up. And the fact that you had whacked the Radio Demon with a pillow…

You buried your head deeper in Alastor’s jacket, muffling your soft awkward giggles as the sheets you were under jiggled along with your shoulders. There was a pause before you heard an irritated sigh, heeled boots retreating into the bathroom and the sound of water running moments later.

You continued to tee-hee under the sheets, eventually catching your breath and emerging from your cocoon, still clutching the blazer close. You quickly glanced back towards the bathroom, and realizing you still had a couple seconds, brought the clothing up to your nose and inhaled deeply. 

It was just like his pillow, but much stronger, and even had a sweaty, musky smell to it. You realized you probably looked like an absolute freak at this moment; who the Hell goes around smelling their friend’s clothes?? But this scent had become such a comfort, you were reminded of happier times. Like the moments when he’d lean in to whisper gossip into your ear during hotel meetings, when he purposely got too close in your bubble to annoy you and crack a terrible joke, or when he danced with you that one day. You were always at your happiest when you were with him.

You sighed contently as you draped the jacket over your torso, thankfully it being long enough to cover you right down to your mid thighs. You pulled the silk sheet back up over you just in time to hear a soft knock on the doorframe of the bathroom.

“Am I allowed back into my own room?” Alastor called out dryly. You chuckled a moment before confirming, and soon Alastor emerged, face still cross, no doubt still fuming over the previous incident. He carried a large bowl filled with bubbly, steaming water in both hands and had a small towel draped over his shoulder. He came to the bedside and placed the bowl down on the nightstand before turning back around to the first aid kit. And you couldn’t help the soft gasp that escaped your throat once his backside was to you. 

No. Fucking. Way. 

Immediately, Alastor’s ears flattened on his head, turning only his head so you could see the profile of his face as he glared at you. 

“ ₩ Ⱨ ₳ ₮ ” 

You snap out of your gaze and lock eyes with him, brain quickly trying to come up with an excuse. 

“Nothing! Nothing, I just…” With a quick smile, you go to grab your shoulder and rotate it around a bit. “I moved funny and felt a pang in my joint. That’s all.”

You continue to try and dazzle him with your smile, to which he glowered at you before turning his attention back to the first aid kit. You felt your muscles relax, relieved he had bought your little white lie. Because you knew if you had spoken the truth, you’d never get to see it again.

See the adorable, soft, fluffy, black and red tail poking out from his tailbone.

You focus back on it and basically have to bite your tongue to stop from squealing. It didn’t even occur to you that he might even have one, but of course it made sense that he did. He was a deer demon after all, many animalistic demons here had just the like. But of course when he wore his jacket it was covered up. You were fairly certain it was designed as such so it helped him keep up appearances. It's hard to be terrified of an Overlord with a cute, little fuzzy tail. 

God. How badly you wanted to touch it; similar to his ears looking so downey and full. But of course, you snapped out of your daydream once Alastor turned back to you, a box of bandaids in hand and his tail disappearing behind his back. You had to hold back your pout, but you were at least grateful you even got the chance to see it. You had the feeling not many did. 

“Now, my dear,” Alastor spoke up, taking the towel from his shoulder and soaking it in the hot water, “Since your main injury has finally been tended to, I’d like to continue my medical procedure before I was so rudely interrupted.” His eyes narrowed into angry slits at you, and you knew he was referring to what happened earlier. You desperately tried to bite back your smile, but couldn’t help your shaking shoulders as you nodded your head.

“Yes.” you softly giggle, “Yes of course. Thank you Alastor.” 

The Radio Demon’s nose wrinkled up in disgust at you before he gave a final sigh, turning back to the bowl and wringing out the excess water in the towel. 

“Honestly… All of this nonsense…” he huffed, genuinely looking confused and slightly irritated, “I don’t understand all the fuss over this type of matter…” Alastor held his hand out to you expectantly, and it took you a moment to realize before you reached out. He carefully held your wrist in one hand, his other holding the warm towel and rubbing your arm. Whatever bloodstains that had soaked into your skin were slowly coming off, and that was more of a relief than you had imagined.

“Even Miss Morningstar had a similar reaction to yours when I first began undressing you.” Alastor continued, carefully turning your arm over and wiping away more blood, “Wild little firecracker, that girl. Nearly singed my jacket and everything…” His eyes tapered into angry slits, yet his words made you perk up.

“Charlie? … Oh God, she knows?” 

“Hmmm. Unfortunately.” Alastor sighed, his grin tight. He dipped the now bloodied cloth into the bowl and squeezed before returning to your arm, “And after her banshee screeches of terror, it wasn’t long before everyone else found out and came rushing over.” His eyelid began to twitch in annoyance, but you felt your skin prickle. Everyone… came rushing over? For you?

“Alastor… what exactly happened while I was unconscious?”

The deer demon rolled his eyes, making you think the event was troubling for him. He turned your wrist over in his hand, giving your forearm an inspection. 

“Must we really talk about such matters?” he grumbled, eyes narrowing angrily at your wrists as  bruises were slowly revealed underneath the blood, “It’s all in the past, and I’d much rather focus on tending to you.”

He had said it so matter of factly, it made your cheeks warm for a moment. Still, a part of you wanted to fill in the gaps as to what happened. And more selfishly, you wanted to hear what the others' reactions were.

“Please Al,” you urged, “I need to know.”

He took a moment to look up and lock eyes with you, eyes flickering over your pitiful face. Finally, he huffed out a sigh, his shoulders dropping in defeat before lifting your hand back up to his face, carefully taking each individual finger and rubbing it between the towel to get into the nooks and crannies of your digits. 

“When you passed out, I immediately transported us to my room,” he began, eyes never leaving his work, “I knew I needed to work quickly to tend to the gashes on your chest; the blood loss was becoming dangerously fatal. So, I laid you on the bed and did what any medical professional would have done: began to undress you.” 

You knew he was literally just trying to save your life, but still, you felt your face grow hot at the thought of Alastor taking your dress off. The deer demon continued.

“Unfortunately, I was in the most precarious position when Miss Morningstar decided to waltz in.” Alastor’s eyelid twitched angrily as he set the towel back in the bowl, reaching now for a bottle of ointment and squeezing some cream into his hand. 

“I was in the midst of reaching behind to take off your…” his eyes flicked away awkwardly, “brassiere, when our little Princess of Hell came in unbenounced. She later claimed she wanted to ask me a question; as to why she didn’t think to knock, I will never know…” Alastor sighed through his nose before gently taking your arm and dabbing the ointment on your various cuts and bruises scattered on your hand and arm.

“Of course,” he scowled, “looking back I can understand where her fury came from. Seeing the infamous Radio Demon lurched over your unconscious, barely dressed form; both of us soaked in blood… I’m sure it was quite a sight.” Surprisingly, he let out a chuckle as you just watched him horrified.

“Ironically, all Hell broke loose.” he sighed, explaining the next portion as if he was bored, “She screamed at me, I tried to explain, she shot fire at me, I dodged. At some point I finally managed to get through to her amidst the blaze and explain the situation. Once she had calmed down, she immediately dropped her fury and rushed to your side, shedding tears over your injuries and blabbering her apologies to me.” Alastor rolled his eyes, but you couldn’t help but feel a pang in your chest at the thought of Charlie crying for you. It made your own eyes start to get a little misty.

“It wasn’t long before everyone else began pounding at the door, having heard the ruckus and coming to aid their precious Princess… No one coming to my aid mind you.” he grunted, “Charlie, wanting to save face, threw the sheets over you for cover before the riled crew bust down the door. And honestly my dear, you know how much I love dramatics, but this…” he gave you a deadpan look for a moment before rolling his eyes, making a giggle escape your lips. His smile widened as he finished rubbing the last bits of cream into your skin before reaching for the box of bandaids.

“I had never seen this camaraderie of sinners so riled up before,” he confided, taking a bandaid out of the box and unwrapping it with his sharp claws, “The moment they saw you in bed, then looked at me covered in blood, I was sure they all wanted me dead.” he paused a second before adding, “Well, other than Nifty. I’m sure she just wanted to clean my soiled clothes when she tried to jump me.” The imagery of Nifty attempting to tackle Alastor made you smile.

“Thankfully,” the Overlord breathed, gently sticking the bandaid over one of your larger cuts, “Miss Morningstar stepped in and explained everything before anyone could lay a finger on me. Which is probably for the best…” His smile got dangerous, a mischievous glint in his eye, “Because if I had my way, they wouldn’t have any fingers left at all.”

You gasped and shot Alastor a dirty glare, making him shift his eyes over to you. He gave a quick shrug of his shoulders before reaching for the bandaids again.

“And then, of course, the waterworks began.” Alastor said wearily, as if the thought of emotions exhausted him, “The Snake was nearly beside himself, blubbering almost as hard as Charlie was. Vaggie sat beside you on the bed like a worried mother hen. Even our little Sourpuss seemed upset over it all. And of course, our dear Nifty tried licking up the blood on your face in an attempt to clean it.” Alastor looked off in the distance fondly at the memory, meanwhile your nose wrinkled in surprise and slight disgust. 

“Our little arachnid friend was especially distraught,” Alastor continued, his face slowly hardening, “He immediately ran to your side and held your hand. He kept going back and forth between comforting you, then scolding me for allowing such things to happen…” you couldn’t help but notice Alastor’s eyebrows furrowing at his last statement, his grin extra tight on his face. Was he feeling… guilty? You were just about to address it until Alastor kept talking, his expression once again soft and rather bored looking.

“Given that you still needed stitches, I managed to convince everyone to leave so I could have space to work.” He stuck another bandaid on one of your cuts, “Charlie was quick to action, ordering everyone around to grab whatever materials I needed. First aid, ice, towels, fresh clothes, and so on. I allowed the girls access to the room so they could help you change into fresh underwear while I prepared my medical supplies.” Alastor took your arm once more and meticulously inspected it, turning it over in his hands to ensure every inch was clean and addressed. 

“Then finally, I was able to dismiss everyone from my quarters. I’m sure they’re all nervously pacing in the lobby as we speak.” he shook his head before gently setting your arm on the bed and ending the story. The Radio Demon took a moment to stretch before standing up once more, taking the bowl and bandaids and moving to the other side of the bed.

You sat there dumbfounded, taking in all the information and feeling yourself getting emotional. They were so quick to protect you, so quick to mourn what you had been through, so quick to take care and provide for you...

Alastor rounded the mattress and set the soapy water down on the bedside table, not expecting to turn back to you with big, watery droplets dripping down your face. He couldn’t help the tiny curl of his lips. Startled by your reaction? Yes. 

Surprised? 

No. Not at all. 

He hummed to himself, taking the washcloth out from the bowl and giving it a quick squeeze before lifting your other arm.

“You have quite the village behind you my dear,” he mused, carefully wiping your forearm. You blinked back your tears and turned to him, taking a moment to watch him scrub you clean. He was entirely focused on you, brows slightly furrowed as he removed the blood, eyes flicking over your skin and taking note of every scratch and bruise that was revealed. He was so serious about it all, taking his time to ensure you were taken care of and personally tending to every wound he could find. Your heart swelled deep within your chest, and before you think, you twist your wrist around in his grasp and lock fingers with his. Alastor’s eyes widened in shock, head wiping up to look at you.

“I really do,” you breathed, eyes still misty but grin beaming, “And I'm so grateful for all of them.” You give his hand a squeeze, leaning in closer and never breaking eye contact. 

“Especially for you. I am so so grateful for you, Alastor. Thank you.” 

The deer demon looked up at you, his whole face wide and smile threatening to waver. There was a gentle pause as you both watched each other, your hand gently grasping his and tenderly rubbing your thumb over his knuckle. Eventually, Alastor blinked back his shock, face furrowing as he unlaced your fingers with his and took your wrist in his hand.

“There’s nothing to thank, my dear.” he mumbled, continuing to rub your arm with the soapy water, “Just doing what any gentleman should.”

Your grin widened by his sudden shift, not at all put off by his dismissive response. He didn’t handle genuine affection well, and that was ok. It just made you more determined than ever to be that person for him; to slowly chip away at those walls he had built up around his heart. Alastor placed the cloth back into the bowl, once again reaching for the ointment now that your arm was perfectly clean. He was being so attentive; you couldn’t help it. You had to say it.

“Your mother would be so proud.”

Alastor paused only briefly as he was squeezing the ointment onto his fingers. But he was quick to recover, snapping the lid shut and carefully pulling your arm closer to dab the cream onto your wounds. He said nothing in return, remaining quiet and looking down as he rubbed the balm into your skin.

But you did notice his ear flicker. 

And that was all the confirmation you needed. 

Alastor continued his tending, the room falling into a peaceful silence as his static hummed softly in the background. He finished your other arm, slicking bandages when needed and returning to the bathroom to refresh the water bowl. You took a moment to admire his work on your arms and couldn’t help the smile creep up your face. The thought of Alastor taking care of you… It was honestly something that seemed so sweet and intimate, and certainly not anything the Radio Demon himself would do. An Overlord nursing a lowly sinner? Unthinkable. Yet here you were, wrapped up in his silk sheets and being doted on as if you were a queen. 

You heard soft jazz beginning to play in the bathroom, and soon Alastor emerged with a bowl of fresh, sudsy water. He rounds the mattress and positions himself at the end of the bed, causing you to raise an eyebrow at his new location. It wasn’t until the deer demon started lifting the blankets by your feet that you subconsciously flinched back. Of course, Alastor noticed, his eyes locking with yours immediately.

“I noticed earlier you had quite a few scrapes on your legs,” he explained, his voice surprisingly calm, “It would be wise to let me examine them.”

You exhaled the breath you didn’t realize you were holding, feeling your shoulders begin to relax. You give a quick nod, and Alastor lifts the sheets up, uncovering your legs right up until the base of your hips, tucking the sheets in a way so your lap and torso was still fully covered. Alastor took in the state of your lower limbs, and his brows furrowed angrily at the sight. Similar to your arms, they were in such an abused state… It made his blood boil to see you like this. 

He immediately sat down and took one of your legs in his, resting your foot on his thigh as he began to clean up the dirt and dried blood. You had to hold in a gasp at the feeling of his fingers brushing over your calf and thigh. You weren't accustomed to the idea of someone touching your leg in such a way, especially the Radio Demon of all people. As nice as the warm towel was, you still felt a smidge uncomfortable by this circumstance. Of course, nothing got past Alastor.

“Relax my dear,” he mused, not breaking concentration from his work, “Your muscles are far too tense right now.” He stopped for a moment, eyes dazing out in front of him as if a thought came to mind. In an instant, he returned the cloth back to the bowl and snapped his fingers, a bottle of lotion popping into his hand. He was quick to apply it to his hands, and what he did next almost floored you.

Long fingers gently began to knead over your calf, pinching and pressing in such a lovely way your heart almost leapt out of your throat. He ran his hands and fingers gently up and down your leg, being wary around any open sores or bruises, but massaging your muscles deeply. Whatever tension you had immediately melted away, his claws surprisingly delicate as he rubbed the tissue. Your head immediately flopped back down on your pillow, eyes closed in bliss as a deep, staticy chuckle rang out by your feet. After working your leg, he moved down to your foot and began massaging your arch and sole. You audibly let out a sigh of relief, it felt so damn good.

“Alastor,” you breathed dreamily, “Where the Hell did you learn to do this and who do I owe my first born to?” Another chortle came from the foot of the bed.

“Entirely self taught darling~” you heard him muse, “My dear mother was always on her feet, working long hours and coming home simply exhausted. As a boy I’d often try and help alleviate the pain whenever I could, so nightly massages became routine. It wasn’t much, but it put my mother in better spirits, so that was what mattered to me.”

You felt your heart practically melt, you were so touched by his words. She really was everything to him; what an amazing relationship to have. You try to imagine Alastor as a little boy, dancing with his mother, helping her around the house, tending to her when she was weary. Truly a momma’s boy right to the end. 

“Your mom sounds absolutely incredible.” you smile, voice soft and gentle. “I wish I could’ve met her…”

Alastor didn’t respond right away, continuing to rub away at your foot as jazz played softly in the background. You assumed the conversation had ended and you were content with letting your mind drift. But at the last minute, you heard a thoughtful hum come from the end of the bed.

“As do I mon passereau… As do I.”

He treated your legs in a similar fashion to your arms; wiping them clean of dirt and blood, applying ointment to help sooth your open wounds, and applying bandages wherever there were particularly large cuts and scrapes. You let out a happy sigh when he started to massage the other leg as well, earning another amused snicker from your friend. The jazz hummed softly in the background as Alastor worked away, being attentive as always and focusing on his tasks while you relaxed blissfully. You were more than happy to let your body sink into the bed, never feeling so cherished in your entire life. The minutes trickled by, your mind getting sleepy after such a relaxing pampering. The only thing that would make this perfect is if you had a warm beverage to sip on.

………….

“Oh my God ALASTOR!” You practically leapt up from the bed, nearly kicking the poor man right on the chin as your feet flew up. The radio came to a screeching halt as Alastor jumped back to avoid getting socked in the jaw. He whipped his head up to you, his eyes glowing red as he snarled at you. But you ignored him, your eyes looking around the room frantically.

“My bag!” you whine, “Did you happen to grab my bag before we left??” 

You couldn’t believe you had almost forgotten. That damn siphon was the whole fucking reason all of this had happened! That and your stupidity for leaving Alastor’s side, but you were going to scold yourself for that later. For now, you needed to know it was ok and totally not lost somewhere in the streets of the city. 

Alastor’s lip twitched, shooting you a most hateful glare. He took a deep, calming breath through his nose before exhaling slowly. Face now softer, other than his furrowed brows and lidded eyes, he stood up and walked away without another word. You watched him nervously as he walked to the nightstand, but felt your heart bloom when he pulled your bag out from the blindspot beside the table. 

“I simply do not understand why you were so desperate for me to grab this for you,” he sneered, tossing the plastic bag onto the bed, “There were much more pressing matters at stake, surely whatever you purchased couldn’t have been that important.”

You ignored his angry tone, grabbing the bag with relief, “I can’t believe you understood what I said in the alley!” you laughed, taking the box out of the bag and beginning to open it. Your heart was racing with joy, but a part of you was filled with dread. You had dropped it before you were attacked, and now you were praying it didn’t get damaged in the fall. The thought of going through all that for a gift that was broken before you had a chance to give it to him? That would be tragic.  

You felt an unusual electric buzz shift in the air as you picked away at the lid of the package. 

“Pardon my confusion,” Alastor spoke, his eyes flickering over the box in your hands, “but I was under the impression you left to shop for new clothes...” His eyes snapped up to you, lifting his hand to point a claw at the box, “This does not look like clothing to me.”

Oops.

You look up briefly and give him a sheepish smile, before focusing back on your task, fingers finally opening the box. “Ah. Right, well…” you could feel yourself start to sweat, “I may or may not have… told the whole truth about-!”

“So you lied to me.” Alastor was fully glaring at you, the radio shuffling and fizzing dangerously.  His smile was taut and eyes cold, eyelid twitching; but you couldn’t see him, too busy focused on digging around the bubble wrap.

“I mean,” you mumbled embarrassingly, “Technically I did, yes, but-!”

“But. What. Y/n.” Alastor growled, his fingers scrunching into tight fists, eyes flashing crimson red, “First you attempt to go off on your own when I explicitly told you not to, and now I come to discover the reason you left was under false terms?”

Still unaware of Alastor’s current state, you manage to uncover the siphon just enough to peek at it. After gently shuffling it around with your finger, you felt your shoulders relax as a relieved smile broke out on your face.

“Oh thank God,” you breathe, more to yourself than to Alastor, “It didn’t break… I was-!”

Alastor’s hands slammed on the bed on either side of you, making you jump up at the sound. Too focused on the gift in your lap, you didn’t realize he had crawled up on the bed with you,  leaning over your body and kneeling over your legs. You shrinked back in fear as the lights flickered, his static buzzing and the room growing cold. His horns were fully extended, but his head was bent forward, his hair covering his expression. 

“You had almost died y/n.” his voice was uncomfortably calm, but you could tell his tone was deeper, darker and sharper than usual. His head slowly rose so you could just see his glowing eyes peek out from his bangs. His eyes were a raging scarlet with sharp, black dial pupils. His fingers curled up into tight fists, clutching the sheets beneath him. 

“Do you not fully understand that?” he continued, eyes narrowing into furious slits, “If it weren’t for me you’d still be bleeding out in that fucking alley way.” his eyes were practically burning you, his stare was so intense, so enraged; you were shivering under his hateful gaze. You would almost prefer it if he yelled at you, screamed and kicked and went on a rampage. But the chiling, silent fury he had… it scared you more. You had to look away, it was too much. But that didn’t stop Alastor. 

“I thought you to be smarter than this.” he seethed, lifting his head up more and showing his sharp, tight smile, yellowed teeth almost as bright as his eyes in this darkened room. His eyes snapped to the box in your lap and immediately he reached down and took it out of your shaking hands. He inspected it for a moment, the anger emanating from him soon growing as he looked back up to you. He then waggled it in front of you tauntingly, his tone growing more aggressive and frenzied. 

“Was this really worth risking your life for?” he sneered, his head tilting so much it caused his neck to snap as he leaned in closer, “Do you not realize how much your life is worth to these fools in this damn hotel? How much it means to-!” 

He immediately stopped dead in his tracks, his eyes widening for a moment. The air was heavy for a solid second before his face scrunched up in fury and his pupils focusing down at the package in his grasp. 

“Well then, dearest,” he spat the last word out, the pet name sounding more like an insult than anything. In an instant he sat up, kneeling over your legs and claws pulling the bubble wrapped object out of the box. His eyes flicked back up to you, to which you still looked away, before peeling the wrapping off of the mysterious item.

“Let’s take a look at what possessed you to risk life and limb, shall we~?”

Stripping the foreign object of its confines, the Radio Demon felt his face widen once the item was revealed. Almost instantly, the radio buzzing silenced, the lights flicked back to normal, and the room became deathly silent. The air was still as Alastor looked down at the siphon, something that brought a wave of memories along with it just at the mere sight. Could it really be…? A hesitant claw slowly reached down and thumbed the smooth glass, eyes dumbly blinking back to normal and his horns slowly shrank. 

There was a heavy pause as Alastor processed the sudden turn of events. But eventually, he managed to slowly lift his head back up to you.

And the sight before him made his stomach churn. 

Big salty tears streamed down your face, your hands scrunched in balls around his jacket that you held up tight to your face. Your eyes were downcast and not daring to look up at him. 

You felt so stupid for crying, but you couldn’t help it. He had never been this angry towards you. Sure you had pissed him off before, but those were under different, more sillier circumstances. He had actually hurt your feelings this time, and what made it worse was that you knew he was right. You knew your actions had not only caused you harm, but had hurt everyone, even Alastor given his reactions. His facial expressions throughout the whole treatment was enough proof, along with the tender aftercare. And the rage that flowed from him just now; clearly the thought of you dying had affected him more than he intended to let on. For fuck sakes, Alastor almost died because of your stupid mistake. You felt your shoulders start to shake. 

“I-I know you were still trying to b-brew the perfect cup,” you start to hiccup under your breath, your voice coming out in shaky warbles, “I-I just wanted to h-help… I d-didn’t mean t-to…” 

You started fully sobbing, burning your face in Alastor’s jacket and unable to stop your tears. 

Alastor didn’t dare to breathe, thinking if he did it might make you blow away into dust with how fragile you were. Usually seeing someone looking so pitiful brought him such delight. But this… This felt wrong. Not from you. Not his little songbird. He had never seen you so upset before, and it was unsettling. You were nothing but a joy around the hotel and its staff, and as much as he hated to admit it, a joy to him. Like a moth to a flame, you were that beacon that brought together wayward souls and made them feel better. And he had snuffed that. 

Your pain was his fault, and for the first time in nearly a decade, he didn’t wish it to be so.

“Don’t cry my dear,” he spoke softly, unsure what to say or do with his hands, “I see now that I was… wrong in my accusations.” He swallowed dryly, his mouth feeling like sandpaper. How does someone attempt to comfort a person in distress? He couldn’t remember the last time he was in such a position, not since he descended at the very least…

“But you’re not wrong.” You sob, voice becoming more frantic, “It w-was stupid for me to go off on my own; if you weren’t th-there I would have died!” your misty eyes widened in horror as the previous events came spiraling back into your mind. “God, I almost died… And you… You almost d-died because of me.” A new wave of tears came flooding through, guilt clawing through your chest and making you hyperventilate. Alastor stiffened at your down spiral, eyes flicking over you nervously. 

“Y/n, it’s alright.” He gently put the siphon down on the bed, raising his hands in a defensive state as if attempting to tame a wild animal. “True, things got… disorderly back there, but we’re no longer in any danger.” A thought popped into his mind and his face brightened slightly, “Also, keep in mind that you also saved my life earlier today. You were practically on death’s door and yet you still risked everything to come to my aid. Such an honorable deed can’t go unnoticed.” He gave you a calming smile, surely convinced that his words would help make you feel better. But your breathing simply became more erratic, too absorbed in your own thoughts to comprehend his.

“B-but all of this was my fault! What I did, the t-trouble I caused… You should hate me after all of this!” You felt like your heart was being crushed after that last sentence, the thought not once occurring to you until this very moment. Would he even want to be your friend anymore after all of this? 

You grasped onto your scalp as your head began to pound, feeling yourself begin to shut down with panic. Your breathing became labored as you shut your eyes tight, your whole body still aching with pain, yet it felt like nothing compared to the dark thoughts swirling in your mind. The reality of everything that had happened was too much. You felt yourself sinking into a dark place, and you were ready to let it consume you…

Until you felt clawed hands gently cup your cheeks, warm and gentle and so familiar. They urged you to lift your head, but you were scared. You didn’t want to look, didn’t dare to meet him in the eye and see his hateful face again. But so tired with tears, you allow your head to be lifted, eyes red and stinging with hurt. Siphon aside on the bed and already forgotten, Alastor’s face leaned in close to yours, watching over your face with sad, furrowed brows and eyes unable to meet yours. 

“Please stop crying,” he whispered, his voice soft and the radio filter barely audible. “I... I can’t stand to see you like this…” His pupils dared to flick up at you as his thumb gently wiped away your tears, desperate to do something, anything, to make you stop. You sat there frozen for a moment, shocked by his actions and sentiment. You had never seen the Radio Demon looking so… vulnerable. It shocked you enough to snap you from your hyperventilating, but in a way, just made your heart break even more. Eventually, his comforting touch made you melt into his hands, tears still pouring down your cheeks.

“I-I’m so sorry Al,” you blubber, your own hands reaching out to hold onto his wrists for support, “It’s all my f-fault… I’m s-so so sorry…” Alastor softly began to hush you, pulling your face closer to his so you were only inches away from each other. A soft, albeit hesitant chuckle escaped from his lips.

“I should’ve known you'd do something so reckless for the sake of a kind gesture,” he mused, but his expression became serious again as his gaze went back to your face, “Reguardless, you shouldn’t apologize for doing something so thoughtful…” He opened his mouth as if he was going to say something else, his eyes flickering away as if hesitant. After a pause, he finally spoke: “If anything, I should be the one apologizing-!”

Immediately you flinched back, aghast by his words. Alastor? Apologizing? You never thought you’d live to see the day. Plus he had nothing to apologize for?! Alastor, still holding your face, recognized your expression and continued before you could interrupt him again.

“Let me finish.” he cocked an eyebrow, his grin threatening to spread in amusement before becoming somber again, “I shouldn’t have yelled at you earlier. And I definitely shouldn’t have let you venture on your own in the market, your injuries are my fault.” his eyes flicked to your hands and you noticed his slight grimace, “I promised you my protection… and I failed you. And for that I am sorry.”

Your lower lip trembled at his words. Alastor wasn’t the type to apologize for his actions (or lack of in certain circumstances). So for him to actually respect you enough to say such things… It was flooring. And completely heartwarming. 

Your breathing had slowly calmed, no longer hyperventilating, but still sniffling in his hands. Alastor softly began to hush you, his electricity buzzing quietly in the background. He wiped your tears away gently with his thumb, making your heart feel like it was going to burst. He was being so kind, so caring…

“... Does this m-mean we’re still friends?” you croak, terrified of his answer. To your relief, Alastor immediately pulled your head closer, pressing his forehead up against yours and running his thumbs tenderly over your soft cheeks and wiping away the new teardrops that formed. A soft chuckle escaped his lips.

“Oh, my darling,” he breathed, “No matter how many times you may get on my nerves, it’s going to take a lot more than that to get rid of me~” his scarlet pupils were locked on yours, unwavering as if looking right into your soul. 

You were whimpering under his hands, feeling yourself sink into him and the relief that he wasn’t going to leave you. You blink back your final tears and close your eyes, happy to just rest your forehead against his and live in this bittersweet moment. Alastor didn’t seem to move away either, subconsciously squeezing your one uninjured cheek like a little stress toy, which made your lips curl into a soft smile. Your body finally calmed, you matched your breathing pattern with his, helping to ground you. Your hands still grasping his wrists, you slowly trace your thumb over his skin in a comforting motion. You felt the familiar muted burn of where the ‘X’ on his forehead would be against your own, something that you were slowly getting accustomed to feeling since meeting him. The room fell silent as you both sat on the bed, minds equally wandering with flickers of thoughts, but also just content to just be in each other’s presence. 

After a peaceful couple of minutes, Alastor nudged your head a bit with his own before pulling away, pushing off his straddling position over you and opting to sit on the edge of the bed beside you, torso still turned to your direction. His hands softly trailed away from your face, but one lightly trailed down your arm until it was holding your hand. 

“I’m flattered that you went to such lengths to get me something so wonderful,” he smiled, eyes looking over at the siphon before returning to you. Like the many ways he had done before, he lifted it up close to his face, looking down at it for a moment before focusing back on your face. 

“It’s something I will treasure for as long as I breathe… Thank you, mon passereau~”

He bowed his head and closed his eyes, bringing your hand up closer. You sighed happily, closing your eyes with relief that it had all worked out, and fully expecting to soon feel that familiar warmth of his forehead against the back of your hand.

But when you felt a warm pair of lips press down instead, you nearly gave yourself whiplash. 

He pressed your hand up to his mouth, warm and soft, eyes closed but a soft expression on his face. The delicate kiss against your skin caused a shiver to zip up your spine, your heart hammering in your chest harder than ever before. 

He’s kissing you. He’s kissing you?? He's kissing you. Do friends kiss each other? Wait, why are you thinking about that. Focus y/n. It’s just on the hand. A friendly kiss on the hand. People do that. Gentlemen do that. Alastor’s a gentleman. This is normal. This is fine. Everything is fine.

His lips slowly parted from your hand, face hovering over your skin and looking up at you with lowered lids and grin wide. His pupils flickered across your burning cheeks, his cheshire grin spreading devilishly before locking on your eyes. As your heart slowly calmed down, you eventually huffed a sigh through your nose, shaking your head in defeat but smiling all the same. 

You give his hand a quick squeeze of affection before lifting your hand out of his grasp and cupping his face delicately. Looking at him endearingly, you stroke your thumb carefully over his face, causing the Radio Demon to cock an eyebrow but not saying anything. 

And just as he was beginning to relax under your touch, you squish his cheeks and gently, playfully, shove his face away from you.

And the deep rumbling laughter that came from his chest was like music to your ears.  “That’s my girl,” he chuckled, eyes wrinkled with happiness, “Now my dear, why don't I show you what quality coffee tastes like~?”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

FIRST PREVIOUS NEXT (Coming soon)

My beautiful does and bucks: @saccharine-nectarine / @doowopshewop / @mysterypotatoink / @wendds / @crispybelieverworld

@raicomme / @letshavedeernnertogether/ @sirens-and-moonflowers / @from-nobody-to-nightmare / @iheartalastor

((EVEN MORE BEAUTIFUL SINNERS!! TYSM!! ᐠ( ᐛ )ᐟ ))

#leilani-lily #alastor #hazbin hotel #alastor x reader #hazbin hotel alastor #hazbin hotel fanfiction #oh deer #alastor the radio demon

[archetypal-archivist]

Azul-Yutu Thoughts 0.3

As inspired by @yuri-is-online and their Future Yutu AU. Go read it, it's good.

The first time Yutu ever gets a chance to talk to Jade for real is after a full day of wandering campus looking for stories about overblot phantoms, monsters, and mages. As such, Yutu's understandably tired, especially since it's edging into proper night now, the clock above the bar ticking softly away as Jade wipes down the counter.

After summarily kicking Crewel out of Octavinelle with a snide reassurance that he'll 'behave,' Yutu was a little startled by how normal and unpersonalized their next few minutes of interaction were.

Do you have any allergies? No. Any strong dislikes? Uh, why? This is an establishment for food and drink, it'd be remiss if me not to feed you. Do I have to pay? Hm, no, not today. Alright... I- guess I don't like spicy things? Oh, also no carrots or celery. And nothing too chunky in my drink, I don't like smoothies! I suppose I can accommodate.

Yutu takes a moment to sit at the bar, spinning around once on the stool before stopping to look Jade up and down. He'd never heard of this person from Yuu, who'd struggled to recall his dad even on their best days. Who was this person to him? An uncle? An ally? Did Jade blame him or his parent for abandoning Azul, however unwillingly? Yutu scrutinizes Jade's appearance, looking for hints as to what his whole deal is.

The first thing that comes to mind is that Jade looks... Tired. No dark bags under his eyes, so he's sleeping, but there's a deliberateness to his movements that tells of trying not to shake, or perhaps of distraction. Jade also doesn't move from his spot much and is slow to rise when ducking below the counter to fish out ingredients, which is another point in the tired category, or perhaps the start of one that screams low blood sugar.

Hey, whatever you're making for me, make some for yourself too. Mm. I mean it. If you're stealing ingredients or whatever to do this, you may as well get something out of it too. Truly benevolent, aren't you? Very well then.

It doesn't take long for Jade and Yutu to have matching salads and glasses of water, which Yutu raises an eyebrow at. It's a struggle not to comment on how, for all that Jade is insisting on feeding him, this is kind of a cheapskate meal. Jade seems to read right through him though and explains that they're still waiting on the next round of supplies to come through; the gardens can supply vegetables and there's apples, canned goods, and nonperishables aplenty, but things like milk or eggs are much harder to come by.

And, Jade comments with a sharp-toothed grin that Yutu immediately clocks as a mer thing, alcohol is more profitable than ever. Not that you're of age, of course. Yutu debates the merits of commenting, figures discretion is the better part of valor (Jade seems too eager to hear his remarks and that screams fishy) and shuts up to eat his salad.

Jade takes his win with good grace and explains how he, Azul, and his- he hesitates for a moment- twin all went to school together. Octavinelle flourished under Azul's care as house warden and he and his brother helped him hang onto control, acting to smooth things out when things got... Rough. Yutu snorts and tries to hide it, snidely commenting that the trio sound like the mafia. Jade laughs a little too, slightly forced, and says that Yuu said the exact same thing when Azul explained their duties to them.

Yutu is surprised at this and asks if Yuu went to school with his father too, which Jade confirms, proceeding to explain their rather dramatic entrance into NRC and how Yuu came to agree to date Azul; something about an overly complicated meal, a broken microwave, and a promise about never going hungry again. All very romantic, Jade assures Yutu dryly, although a bit insufferable for him and his brother, who had to ensure Azul survived the pinning phase first.

Yutu immediately opens up about what little he knows of Azul and what Yuu had told him, hoping for confirmation, a solidification of what he knows. What Jade does instead is smirk and proceed to rip apart the honey-golden nostalgia and replace it with goofy tales of how his father was actually a bit of a dork.

Yutu had deliberately told Jade some of the sappier things he knew about Azul because he pinned Jade as being a tease and the man would likely contradict whatever spin he put on his dad. This, though? Yutu isn't sure what to do with this; he'd expected flaws or ways his father got angry or unreasonable, not 'flaws' and hidden affection. Azul... His dad was really loved, huh.

Yutu tries to stretch out his last few bites of salad, uncertain and trying not to show it. If Yuu loved his dad so much, if Jade teased but couldn't hide how much he missed him, if Crewel spoke of Azul's talents and intelligence so highly, then how should Yutu feel? All he has to go on is what other people tell him and he doesn't yet know if he wants to love Azul too, let alone if he will come to love the real Azul or the Azul people loved. Stories and real people are so rarely similar, after all.

Seeing Yutu get quieter and quieter, Jade figures that he's tired and politely starts urging Yutu to head to bed. Yutu agrees, hesitates, then asks if he can come talk to Jade again. Jade is a little surprised because he thought it was a given, then a little surprised at himself for so easily falling back into old habits. Just an hour or so in the presence of a boy who looks so much like his old friend, and he's ready to accommodate him. Ha, how foolish...

Jade keeps his thoughts behind his teeth and agrees with a smile, urging Yutu to drop by at least once a week as Jade works most evenings and on Sunday afternoons from 10 to 6. Yutu furrows his brow, pointing out that 10 is hardly in the afternoon, Jade croons about how Yutu must wake up so late in the day if he thinks 10 is in the morning, Yutu grumbles, Jade teases and urges Yutu to get to bed sooner or else noon may start looking like morning too.

Yutu decides to let Jade get the last laugh for now and heads out, leaving Jade to the silence of Octavinelle. He doesn't look back but if he were to do so, he'd see how Jade would look oddly diminished now that he's alone, hovering over the bar top like a specter as if he doesn't know what else to do with himself.

Jade stares after Yutu, gaze distant, before turning back to the dirty dishes on the counter. The salad plates are swept up easily enough but the water glasses- Jade pushes them so they're next to each other, identical in their emptiness. He stares for another moment, then places an empty purple coffee mug in front of the two glasses, making a neat trio. He returns to the sink to wash the dishes, the camera remains focused on the cups as Jade fades into the background, and the screen fades to black.

#twisted wonderland #yutu-verse #jade leech #twst #my writing #fanfiction

[dbphantom]

maybe i should have gone into practical effects instead of computer science...

#when i was in middle school i used to use red and black pens + spit for blending to make it look like the backs of my hands were torn open #i can't believe it's almost 4am. i just spent 5 hours typing up an essay about MM's erik that i just fuckin privated bc i was embarrassed #AND I STILL NEVER SPELL HIS NAME RIGHT THE FIRST TIME AAAAAAAA #i was right but im going to save all my points for the fanfic im currently planning out and promptly NEVER GOING TO ACTUALLY WRITE #I say shoving my plans for my h2o s3 rewrite off the table #yes i skipped from s2 to s3 i had a BRILLIANT idea [season 3 h2o spoilers ahead be wary my mutuals who are still watching] #okay so you know how lewis goes to the american institute of marine bio in the middle of 3? since this is tied to my s2 rewrite fic i wante #to actually finally reasonably re-introduced dr denman to the story because i never liked that she just fucked off at the end of s1 #despite WITNESSING the moon pool magic. so i made it so she runs into lewis while doing a presentation for the college and they have a chat #(because her JAW paper plays an important part in my s2 rewrite bc i imagine lewis is the kind of guy who SAYS he deleted every copy of #it... but ACTUALLY he secretly printed himself out a copy to study in private to compare to his own notes bc #[lewis voice] come *on* guys just THINK of the progress that he could make with this! [grabby hands in front of chest]) #so yeah they have a chat and Linda kind of gives Lewis the opposite dilemma in s3 that Louise gives him in s1 about science and magic #since SHE knows about the moon pool and has been biding her time and she knows Lewis knows and Lewis is like ah... uh oh. #it will eventually tie into the idea it's not about forcing science and magic together or separating them #its abt respectfully and responsibly utilizing both to see their fullest potential. which lewis learned in s2 and Linda has... not. #BUT #later on she gets a call from 1 (one) ryan who is like 'hey so i heard u did environmental studies on mako for dr bennett a couple years ag #and i was wondering if you've seen anything weird there as im currently doing a-' and she's immediately like 'YOU SON OF A BITCH IM IN' #and he's like 'wha-' and she's like 'i have already booked my plane tickets we're going to have a great time we have lots to talk about :)' #and wheeee now they have someone who knows about mermaids on their team and it's the perfect way to bring lewis back to relevancy in s3 :D #it also gives me reason to have two bad bitches (linda and sophie) meet and get to know each other which is not a dynamic ive seen in #any of the H2O fics i've ever read so im very hyped to delve into how they'll play off each other #also charlotte is there so technically three bad bitches (only in my au Charlotte never lost her tail and is part of the gang she just move #because she felt like she needed to leave to really be able to find herself without being in her grandmother's shadow but she comes back bc #well... it's season 3 mako is sounding the fucking emergency alarms everyone is showing up sdkghkfjhg) #im also so so so hyped to show u guys who's coming back in the s2 rewrite because it ISNT denman and i think everyone thinks it will be :3c #(i said she when telling ppl to look forward to a familiar face... but can u blame me for getting hype she's one of my favorite characters! #i love u H2O #cruddy rambles

[lovethatlaiduslow]

it’s so cool to listen to music for 18 musicians and hear how much it inspired illinois sufjan stevens

#the first time I heard it I was immediately like oh. this is come on feel the illinoise #I need a full breakdown of the similarities a la overly long YouTube video essay #like the repetitive hypnotic super dense orchestration… it’s so unique I looove it #becoming one of my all time fave classical pieces

[5-htreuptakeinhibitor]

funnie storie in tags

#last week when i turned 21 i immediately picked up vodka and thc-o edibles after school #btw thc/adjacent compounds all break down in the stomach into the same substance (delta 11 thc) #and also alcohol potentiates and breaks down cannabanoids (hence why getting crossed is so crazy) #so. #serving size for the eddies? 1. 50mg. in fact on the back it recommended to cut in fourths. #well. instead of dividing by 4 i multiplied by 4 #200mg psht thats nothing ive done more than that #which is true #but i was FUCKED UP when i did #and this time i had drank maybe like #a shot of vodka #MAYBE #and like at first i was like ooh yeah this is vibe oh yeah #then um. i realized it wasnt done hitting #and they were doing monthly room checks (dorm) during a 2 day period #one of which was my birthdya #well #i started getting scary high and it was like 8pm mind you theres no way they would come around at that time anyways even if they hadnt #checked already #it literally kept getting worse i kept checking out the peep hole my ass was looking UNDER THE DOOR every time i heard someone #oh my god if i wasnt stoned i wouldve had an anxiety attack (paradoxical bc i wouldnt have been anxious if i wasnt scary high) #eventually i literally could not keep my head up to Check For Danger and i passed out on my glasses #(note: i would NEVER!!!!!!!! SLEEP IN THE SAME SPACE AS MY GLASSES!!!!!!!!!!!! I TAKE CARE OF THEM!!!!!!!!!) #anyway i think i greened out #it was my first time doig that which is impressive because ive probably spent like a year out of the past 3 being super high all the time #and the other 2 were spent being mildly high #and i have definitely eaten more edibles than 200mg at once #but i surpose i havent drank as well #but ya thats my story about turning 21 and greening out for the first time after having an extreme anxiety episode #i was fr about to look through my roommates shit (she isnt here most of the time) for her xans LMAO

[nexus-nebulae]

"hey. what the fuck, man"

- one of our fictives coming to front for the first time in eight months and immediately scrolling past fanart of him even though we literally haven't seen content from that fandom much less of that character since we left it eight months ago

#seriously how is it that we constantly have coincidences where someone comes to front #and then something incredibly relevant to Specifically them IMMEDIATELY happens #scroll past fanart of a guy for the first time in months at the same time he's fronting for the first time in months #someone comes back to front and IMMEDIATELY one of Their Songs plays on our like 1000+ song shuffle #(and usually we only pick like 2 or 3 Per Guy we don't usually have enough favourite songs that it's super likely) #someone says something in headspace using some word and we think like 'thats a word we dont use often how unusual' #and then two minutes later that same word is said in whatever we're listening to like. Thats Weird That We Heard That Word Twice #anyway back on topic of the guy this post is about we keep trying to catch him up on What He Missed #but every time we say 'yea man it's been months' hes like 'no it hasnt' and simply moves on #he just Refuses #this is the same guy who when we introjected him we were like 'welcome to the system' #and he was just like 'nah I'm not part of a system I'm not in front' while. in front talking solely to the other guys in his head. #and like it's not like. being in denial i don't think. i think he's just fucking with us #because that's entirely in character for him #just the 'im not stealing' he said putting multiple things in his pocket in plain view type of energy #and then if someone goes 'no you did i literally just saw you do it!!!' 'no i didn't' *continues shoveling things into his pockets* #so we mention multiple months have passed and he's just 'nah' #little shit. #also he did acknowledge the other changes that happened so he knows Time Has Passed at least #just *finds out we don't talk to someone anymore* oh why??? :( *finds out why* Oh. :| #no fuckin remorse as soon as he found out he was like 'aight they're dead to me now no questions asked what's next'

[sttoru]

.⌇ 𝐒𝐘𝐍𝐎𝐏𝐒𝐈𝐒. it’s late at night and you try to cuddle with sukuna. keyword; try.

wc. 1.2k

tags. true form!sukuna x female reader. fluff, angst (+comfort). heian era. size difference (readers referred to as small). sukuna’s a bit mean, but he also has a soft spot for you. miscommunication ? it gets solved. reader gets called ‘woman, doll’.

“what are you trying to do?” sukuna sighs. you’re up to something again, he figures. his red eyes follow your body as it crawls up to him on the bed.

you’re both tired after a long day of fulfilling some duties here and there around the estate. all you need is a big beefy man wrapping his arms around you to keep you warm and safe.

the perfect man for that is sukuna. those four arms of his wrapped around your small body feel like heaven.

“it’s called cuddling,” you retort. the sarcastic tone you used triggers a deep sigh from the sorcerer. sukuna holds back the urge to say something sarcastic as well.

he doesn’t utter a single word once you snuggle up to his chest. you’ve taught him how to cuddle during the first time you asked him to hold you. sukuna was awkward with showing any type of affection back then.

. . he still very much is.

“hug, please,” you remind him. the cold-hearted man scoffs, though listens to your polite request. all four of his arms imprison you against his chest, your small body nearly disappearing behind his limbs.

that’s what you like most about those cuddles you share together; how you fit so perfectly in his strong arms. it’s much more comforting than you thought it would be.

a pair of hands rests on your waist, the other pair on your hips. sukuna glances down at you and immediately notices that smile on your lips. even after all this time, he still cannot fathom why you’re so carefree around a monster like him.

and that inability to understand you and your love for him is accompanied by an urge to push you away.

“you got your hug, now get up,” sukuna interrupts the silence. his voice is cold and devoid of emotion—he uses that voice when he talks to other people. not with you, “i have better things to attend to.”

thus, it hurts. when he talks to you like that. like you’re not the person he secretly cherishes most. though, you remind yourself of sukuna’s own words. the ones you heard him say a while ago.

‘love is meaningless’, he said. you remember. and yet you kept hoping that he’d change his mind about that statement. you hoped and eventually saw exactly that: your presence and your affectionate gestures mellowed his heart of steel.

but all that effort seems to go down the drain every time sukuna pushes you away.

you know it’s because he’s unfamiliar with the feelings of love. he may not say it nor show it, but you know that sukuna’s afraid of hurting you. so, he creates a gap between you two every now and then.

you know and yet you’re patient.

“oh, ‘kay,” you nod in understanding. you pull away from his embrace and get up from the bed. your bottom lip trembles.

sukuna is not gullible. he’s anything but oblivious. especially if it’s about how you feel and act. he notices every single change in your mood; whether you mask it or not.

you walk to the sliding doors—ready to open them and step out into the hallway. your eyes are a bit watery, but you quickly blink the tears away and take a deep breath in. you reach for the door.

“come back here, woman.”

sukuna’s booming voice makes you stop. you glance at his form over your shoulder. he’s leaning against the headboard of the bed, arms crossed and eyebrows furrowed.

is he. . . upset?

“why? you said you had better things to attend to.” you answer with a shrug. you try your best to not make it seem like his earlier words had effected you. you turn your head towards the word with a huff, “go on, then.”

sukuna narrows his eyes. he sucks at communicating what he actually desires—what he actually wants. right now that want is for you to stay. even though that completely contradicts his previous words.

the sorcerer doesn’t know what to do. when you’re with him, he pushes you away out of guilt. when you’re away, he wants you back with him.

love is complicated.

“you. . .” sukuna grunts in frustration. all those feelings for you inside of his heart are playing with his rational thoughts. he doesn’t like seeing you upset. he wants the usual you back, “tsk. fine then.”

silence, followed by the creaking of the bed frame. seems like sukuna’s getting up to do whatever ‘business’ he needed to attend. at least, that’s what you thought.

you slide the door open and set a foot outside of the chambers. before the other could follow, you’re suddenly lifted up in the air by a strong pair of hands. your vision turns upside down as your body is effortlessly hoisted onto a shoulder.

“woah!” you gasp and feel the blood go to your head. your eyes are fixed on the back of your lover. you kick your legs in protest, but only get a smack to your ass in response. you whine at that, “put me down!”

“watch it, doll,” sukuna hisses at your fierce demand, a warning to fix your tone. he puts you back down on the soft mattress. he’s surprisingly gentle when he settles you in place—not throwing you on the bed or anything similar, “should’ve listened when i told you the first time.”

your eyes meet sukuna’s and you notice how much they’ve softened. that alone makes the lump in your throat disappear. your love for him isn’t one sided—you’ve always kept that in the back of your mind—yet your thoughts made you overlook the little things he does for you.

his actions speak louder than his words. that’s the kind of man he is.

sukuna’s trying to open up more, though that process is slow. you’re fine with that.

especially when there’s that faint pout on his lips as he stares at you. his eyebrows are still furrowed, his crimson eyes sharp yet warm.

“oh, you want me back in bed this bad?” you tease once you get the opportunity. the man in front of you clicks his tongue and grabs your cheeks with one hand, turning your head up to face him.

sukuna’s eyes are focused on yours. the eye contact is intimidating, but you’re hypnotised. you physically can’t look away. he leans in and bites your lip with his sharp canines, “shut up.”

that raspy whisper alone confirms your assumption. you giggle at his attempt of refuting your point. you’re used to all those intimidating words and actions he pulls to get you to stop your teasing.

those empty threats—it’s becoming rather cute with how hard he tries to deny everything. he fails nearly every time, however.

“come,” sukuna lays back against the pillows after placing a quick and sloppy kiss against your lips. he pulls your body against his and presses your head against his chest, right where his heart is beating, “continue with your.. ‘cuddling’ thing.”

he put your ear right above his heart, because he remembers listening to his heartbeat calms you down. you told him that a while back. sukuna doesn’t understand why you like it, but his fingers massage your scalp either way.

that’s also something that brings you comfort.

you’re surprised by how much he knows about you, but appreciate it anyway. he remembers both the big and small things about you. ‘that’s how he probably shows his love,’ you conclude silently.

#sttoru writes. #jjk x reader #sukuna x reader #jjk fluff #sukuna x you #jjk x you #jjk x y/n #sukuna x y/n #sukuna fluff

[homunculus-argument]

When it comes to high-context and low-context cultures, where one has the expectation of people understanding specific subtle nuances of what someone says, and the other has the expectation that everything needs to be explicitly said to be understood, I've heard plenty of people from low-context cultures ask "why not say what you mean and mean what you say then, why would you have to speak in riddles?" about high-context ones, like people of the latter type are just being cryptic and esoteric on purpose.

But culture does not consist of things you do on purpose, it is just the way things are done where you were raised. And when you were raised in a high-context culture, the thought of needing to explicitly state something instead of using some phrase or expression that you've learned to use comes as a culture shock, too. It's not "fuck you for not correctly understanding my riddles three", but "oh shit, I hadn't occurred to me that I would need to say that out loud."

The first time I went on a business trip to the US, my partner came with me, and we immediately discovered that he does not fare well on long flights. So when my publisher asked me about future trips, inquiring whether my partner would be coming with me, I asked him. He said that he would, if the flights weren't such a problem - he would need to travel in some way where he could get his feet up or lay down during flights, like business class or first class. Being also a finn, I understood what he meant and relayed the message as is to my publisher, not considering that they might not.

To both of our surprise, they started to actually look for first class tickets for us.

Finnish culture is a high-context one, people don't talk much and aren't very confrontational. Being demanding and putting someone else into a position where they're forced to be upfront or demanding is rude. And in finnish, saying "this would only be possible if these entirely absurd/completely impossible conditions were met" is a polite way of saying "no". You are simply explaining why something cannot be done, without either saying an explicit "no" or seeming like you're making up excuses. It offers the other party an opportunity to agree that these conditions cannot be met, so neither party will come off as confrontational or demanding.

Both me and my boyfriend considered it self-evident that the request was absurd, and could not be read as anything but a polite way to decline. It had not occurred to me that an american's natural response to "it would be impossible to do this" is to start figuring out how to do it anyway.