#this ain’t prove read x

[yeonzzzn]

♣️i told you so: sim jaeyun

part two of the off limits trilogy

pairing: jake x afab!reader word count: 26.8k

synopsis: your brother and boyfriend’s constant nagging you to transfer to their college finally worked, you breaking at the soft spot you have for them and packing your whole college life into suitcases and boxes. at first you were actually happy, being with your friends again. but as time passes, jake’s past college life that was before you, unfolds and stirs up trouble. genre: established relationship, older brothers best friend!au, college life, smut, fluff, angst. warnings: swearing, multiple unprotective sex scenes, breeding kink, masturbating, fingering, alcohol, hate sex, oral (f. receiving), few toxic moments, blood mentions.

✰ this is part two to this series, please see part one under the title before reading this one. ✰

˗ˏˋseries spotify playlist´ˎ˗

His right hand gripped the wood of your headboard, using all his arm strength and using it as leverage fucking hard into you with each thrust, pushing himself as far as possible into your cunt wanting to break any barrier keeping him from actually pushing his dick into your cervix. 

his free hand gripped your hand, pressing it against the bedsheets, his fingers tightly squeezing your hand. 

Your lips attached to his shoulder, teeth sinking onto his skin at the pleasurable pain, your legs wrapping even tighter around his waist. 

“Oh fucckkkkkk,” your boyfriend moaned, his sweat that rolled down his face dropped onto your shoulder, “Your pussy feels so good baby girl, fuck.” his hand that held the headboard started to turn white from his death grip, and his veins popping out of his arm. 

The knot in your stomach snapped, your orgasm sending you even further into sexual ecstasy. Your teeth bite down harder onto his skin as your head spins, Jake letting out a groan of pleasure from your bite. The only sounds that could be heard in the bedroom were the sound of your skins connecting together, both your moans and the squeaking of your bed as Jake pounded into you with such force. 

“Fuck, Y/N, I’m cumming soon,” Jake groaned, his hard thrusts getting sloppy, the grip on the headboard weakening, “Gonna fill this pussy so full of my cum, ain’t that right princess?” You nodded, head falling back down onto the pillow, eyes darting to the purple bruise left on his skin from your bite and then locking eyes with him at his fucked out facial expression. 

“Hmmm going to fill you to the brim,” his thrusts slowed even more, Jake knew he was fixing to bust any moment, “Gonna breed the fuck out of you, gonna make me a daddy. fuck.” 

With one final thrust and one final moan that left his lips, his seed painted your gummy walls white, his hand leaving the headboard and snaked both arms underneath you and wrapped his hands on your shoulders, slowly rolling his hips with yours pumping himself so full inside you, using your shoulders as his leverage to help keep his cock deep within you chasing his own ecstasy. 

With no strength left in him, Jake drops his body onto yours, his face tucked into your neck, his hot breath sending chills down your spine and wet, sweaty hair pressing against your cheek, “I meant it when I said I couldn’t get enough of your pussy,”

You struggled to let out a giggle, loosening your legs from his waist, and tapping his back softly, “Trust me, Jake, I know. You’ve proved it more than enough.”

You felt his lips curl against your skin, “Fuck, I love you so much.” 

“I love you so much more, Sim Jaeyun.” 

With an exhausted groan, Jake pulled himself out of you, rolling over onto his back, chest heaving. You pushed yourself up, legs feeling like jelly, “I’m barely going to be able to walk tomorrow,” 

You could basically feel Jake’s shit-eating smirk as he chuckled, “Don’t tell me that, it’ll boost my ego and make me want to fuck you again.” With a roll of your eyes, you slid off your bed, collecting your clothes that were spread around the floor. 

Jake pushed himself up, eyes looking down at your bed, “Thank god we won’t ever have to have sex in this bed ever again.” You tried to not laugh, but it was true. Your good ole college bed was on its last leg enough as it was, and with the good, rough fucking Jake just gave you, it probably wouldn’t last another minute. You're surprised it lasted this long. It barely survives when Jake comes to visit you. 

“Maybe when you leave your dorm key tomorrow morning, you can complain about how the dorms need better beds for you girls, no wonder your roommate always sneaks off.” 

You glanced over at your roommate's bed, seeing how hers was in no better condition than yours. With a shrug, you slid your clothes back onto your body, “It’ll be her problem if she gets caught sneaking out.” 

Jake finally brings himself out of the bed, stretching his arms out then scoops his clothes up in one motion, “Yet you’ve never gotten caught sneaking me in.” Which was also true. Your college had strict dorm policies, no sneaking out and no sneaking in. Obviously, the rules didn’t mean shit to yourself or the other college students. Plus your roommate wasn’t a snitch. You’d sneak Jake in, she would sneak out and off with her boyfriend. It was a win-win. 

Jake wrapped his arms around you, kissing your neck, “You ready to finally be out of here?” You leaned into him, your eyes wandering around your dorm room. It was a bittersweet feeling for sure. But you’d be out of this shitty dorm and be surrounded by your brother and best friends again. The only place you’ve wanted to be since your winter vacation almost four months ago. You still couldn’t believe that Jay and Jake were able to convince you to transfer. It only took about a month to fully convince you, but you knew in the end it would be worth it. 

It was finally spring break, and what better time to transfer than right now? You finally nodded, “It'll be nice to finally be around you all twenty-four-seven again.” 

Jake’s heart warmed at the thought of finally having you in his bed every night instead of being a four-and-a-half-hour drive away. But the wait was worth it. He hugged you tighter, “Well, we have a long drive ahead of us tomorrow, let’s wash up and get some sleep, ya?”

A playful smile formed on your lips, “Dibs on the shower first!” you pushed your weight onto Jake, sending him back on the bed. 

Jake was quick to be back on his feet chasing after you to the bathroom with the biggest smile on his face, “That’s cheating Y/N!” 

After your play fight on who would shower first, you settled on taking one together, sharing that space with each other one last time. 

You brushed your teeth and popped a Plan B pill into your mouth, swallowing it down, gathering the rest of your things from the bathroom, and placing them into your duffle bag. Exhaustion hit you like a truck when you finally crawled into bed beside Jake, laying your head down onto his chest as he wrapped his arms around you. Sleep came quickly. 

You gave your roommate one last hug then slung your backpack over your arms and held one duffle bag between your hands. Jake walked back into the dorm, taking the last remaining duffle bag and slinging it over his shoulder, “All the boxes and suitcases are in the trunk, ready to hit the road?” 

You nodded, giving your roommate one last smile before walking out of the room for the last time. 

The dorm building was filled with busybodies. People pack up to head home for the week, some pack up to leave and never return(like yourself), some walk to and from their friend's dorm rooms, and some just sit out in the hallway just because. Ya know, your typical college dorm things. A lot of the girls you’ve grown to know over the last couple of years stopped to wish you well, but you knew it was to get one last look at your boyfriend. 

You held your tongue as you watched them all make flirty faces and say cute “We’ll miss seeing you around!” towards him, doing it all in front of you like you weren’t even there. 

Alas, all you could do was roll your eyes and keep walking forward. Your hands were filled with your bags anyway. Plus it’s not your fault your boyfriend is literally the sexiest man alive, you don’t blame the girls for looking. 

Shoving the last remaining things of yours into the trunk, it was finally time to go. Jake took the driver's seat in your car, his hand immediately going to your thigh and giving it a soft squeeze, a way to reassure you that everything was going to be okay. You had to admit, you were nervous. After leaving your home and spreading your wings, this college was all you knew. So it was hard, yes. But you were turning a new page, which was also exciting. 

You had fallen asleep on the way to the apartment, your new home. Being gently shaken awake by Jake, “Hey, baby, we’re home.” 

Jake got way too excited saying that. It just felt so right calling it our home. A place where you’ll always return to him at the end of the day. A place to eat, sleep, and live freely together. What more could he ask for?

You sleepily yawned, stretching your arms and legs out then finally getting out of your car. 

Jake opened the trunk, pulling each of your bags out one by one. 

You leaned in to help, wanting to get the process moving quicker. Because let’s be honest, the worst part about moving is the packing and unpacking. 

“Hey stinks!!” you cringed at the nickname, looking over to your right and seeing your brother hovering over the balcony railing waving his arms back and forth. 

“God, I hope he falls.” you mumbled, “So annoyed with that nickname.” 

Jake chuckled at your comment then glanced up at his best friend, “Get your ass down here Jay! We have a lot of shit to bring up! Get Hoon and Hee!”

Jay saluted him, turning on his heels and rushing back inside their shared apartment, returning with the ace and prince and forcing them down the stairs. Jay was the first to swoop you into a hug, “I’ve missed you!” 

You rolled your eyes but embraced your older brother, “It’s only been a couple months, Jongseong.”

“A couple of months too many!” Jay joked, rustling his hand in your hair. You shoved him away, quickly fixing your locks back into place. 

Sunghoon was next to pull you into a tight hug, “You’d think since he spent over twenty-one years with you he’d want nothing to do with you.” 

“No, tell me about it, Hoon,” you said, hugging him back tightly. Sunghoon’s hugs were always your favorite. You found so much peace within them.

Heeseung was the last to pull you into a hug, “Sup stinks!” 

You pinched his side, “I will not be tolerating that nickname anymore!” 

Jay shrugged his shoulders, wrapping his arm around your neck, “Deal with it, you’ll be living under MY roof now. I’ll call you stinks all I want.” You tried to fight your way out of your brother's grip, begging for any of the other three boys for help. But of course, they didn’t. 

Traitors. All of’em.

Jake finally started barking orders for everyone to grab some bags and haul them up into the apartment. You carried what you could, following behind Heeseung, “I’ll show you to Jake’s room, or well your room now too.” 

“Please for the love of GOD force him to keep his room clean now,” Sunghoon begged, “His socks smell.”

“So do yours?!?” Jake yelled up at his friend, the only response he got was the laughter of his friends and you. 

Jake rolled the sleeves up of his hoodie, cocking his head to the side, “Whose idea was it again for the four of us to move in together?” 

Jay grabbed another box from the trunk, “Ours. Unfortunately, the four of us are inseparable.”

Jake nodded in agreement, “Well, the five of us now.” 

Jay tried to not cringe at that fact, he’s still getting used to seeing you and his best friend together. Jay watched as his friend balanced a few boxes in his arms, the brown material yanking down the collar of his hoodie, revealing the bite mark you left on his shoulder last night. 

Jay groaned and rolled his eyes, “Really man?!” 

Jake narrowed his eyebrows, clearly confused as to why he was getting snapped at, “Bro, what?” 

Jay flicked the tender skin, “Can’t even fucking cover it up?” 

Oh, he’s still pissed that I’m fucking his baby sister.

Jake shrugged, “I can’t stop what your sister does during se—“

“No!! Stop!!” Jay quickly snapped, raising his hands up, “I don’t want to talk about your sex life.” 

Jake took this opportunity to tease, “Damn, what a shame, too bad you’ll be hearing it instead of talking about it.”

Jay’s face flushed with anger, “We aren’t playing these games, Sim Jaeyun. I’ll kick your ass so fast.” 

With a roll of his eyes and a slap on his friend's shoulder, Jake walked past him, “I was only teasing, let’s hurry up and get this stuff inside, I bet Y/N is dying for your cooking.” 

Jay pulled the rest of the bags into his hands, following beside his best friend, “When does she not want my cooking?” 

“Dude, sometimes it’s all she talks about.” 

Your brother chuckled, “She was spoiled with it growing up, plus I’m a damn good cook, what can I say?” 

Your spring break went by in a flash. That small week wasn’t enough to rest your mind after the move or get accustomed to your new home. You knew it would be a process, Jake reassured you that everything would fall perfectly into place once you’re used to the change. 

Obviously, he’s right. You just need more time to adjust. Mostly because you completely forgot that your new roommates like to party…

You stood in the corner of the living room, one hand twirling the liquid-filled plastic red cup in your hands, while your other hand was on Jake’s necklace, your fingers twisting the double-linked pendants. The music was too loud for your liking, the voices too loud, and way too many people surrounding just the living room itself was enough to make you feel more introverted than normal. You lifted the plastic cup to your lips, eyes wandering around the house. 

It’s so obvious this is a frat house. 

You wanted to leave, wanted to strangle your sibling for even suggesting attending this end-of-spring break party. You finished off your alcohol, eyes staring down at the last drop as it slid back down the cup. 

“You’re related to Park, aren’t you?” 

You lifted your eyes, making eye contact with the random man who decided to speak to you. He has a sweet smile, his eyes and body language proving he’s just asking a question, but you kept your guard up anyway. Pretty much head to toe, he was covered in Louis Vuitton. His fingertips brushed his light brown hair out of his eyes, his smile not fading even after your long waiting response.

“You’ll need to be more specific,” you said, setting the red cup on top of the fireplace beside you, “I know a lot of Parks.” 

“Jay,” he said, pointing his finger in the direction of the dining room table that sat on the far side of the living room where a cuppong game was being held. Jake, Heeseung, and Sunghoon all stood around your brother as he tossed the ping pong ball across the table, landing it in one of the cups with a slight splash of alcohol inside it. He and his friends cheering at their point. 

“You look just like him, have the same nose and jaw structure.” 

Fair, guess you couldn’t even try to get out of this one. The two of you did share the same nose and jawline. 

So you just nodded, “He’s my older brother.” 

“I could tell,” he laughed, taking a sip from the beer can in his hands, “Your facial expressions are the same too. I knew who you were from across the house.” 

You couldn’t tell if that was supposed to be a dis or a compliment. 

“He talked about you a lot in chem a few semesters also,” the man said, now standing beside you, leaning against the wall, “One proud big brother, that’s for sure.” You softly smiled, glancing back over at Jay as he whispered into Heeseung’s ear as he prepared to toss the ping pong ball. 

“Also, I apologize, how rude of me,” he turns his body towards you, extending his hand out, “I’m Shotaro,” 

You take your hand in his, giving a small shake, “I’m YN, but you probably already knew that, Shotaro.”

Shotaro chuckled, “Yeah, but it’s nice to finally put a name to the face.” You nodded, giving him a smile. 

Jake glances over at you at the right time to see Shotaro’s hand tangled in yours, “Why does Osaki have his hands on our girl?” Jake said, tapping Jay’s shoulder. 

Jay takes his eyes off the horrible job Sunghoon is doing at cup pong, “Looks like he’s just being friendly?” Jay shrugged it off, eyes going back to Sunghoon. Jake was in disbelief. 

This man right here. 

“Dude,” Jake scoffed. Jay, looking back at him with a confused look, raised his brows, “You almost killed me for just looking at your sister, but you’re perfectly fine letting Shotaro touch her?” 

“Jake, they shook hands,” Jay rolled his eyes, “He’s very clearly not trying to get in her pants like you were.” Okay, fair. Point taken. “He’s a sweet kid, probably just recognized her.” 

Jake knew that had to be it, but he couldn’t help but feel the pit of jealousy of some other man who wasn’t your brother or his friends, being that close to you. Without thinking, Jake’s legs were moving. 

“Jake! Where are you going?!” Heeseung yelled over the loud music but decided to shrug it off since Jake wasn’t listening. 

Your conversation with Shotaro kicked off well, listening as he talked about the party and the campus, and asking what brought you here to their college. 

“Well,” you shrugged, “Jay and—“ You were quickly interrupted by Jake’s arms being wrapped around your waist from behind, “There you are baby,” he said, dropping his face to your neck, and planting kisses on the skin. 

Shotaro quickly looked away, taking the last sip of his alcohol. He knew Jake had to have been interested in someone since he randomly stopped showing up to parties and would disappear during the weekends. Shotaro wasn’t close to Jake and his friend group, only ever really spoke to them during classes or in passing on campus or at parties. 

Shotaro should’ve put two and two together that the person Sim Jake was interested in were you. If there’s one thing he did know about you and your friends, was that you five all grew up together. Of course, it made sense you’d be with one of Jay’s friends. Jake was just the last person on that list in his mind. 

“Jake,” you hissed, shoving your shoulder into his jaw.

With a soft groan, he removed his lips from your neck, his eyes darting over to Shotaro, “I see you met Osaki, he’s a good kid.” 

Shotaro tried to suppress himself from giving Jake an annoyed look, clearly hearing and picking up the attitude behind his tone. You, on the other hand, didn’t catch it. 

“Yes, he’s been really sweet so far,” Shotaro smiled at you, giving a nod, “We were just talking about how you and Jay convinced me to move.” 

Ah, of course, he was part of the reason she moved here. Should have guessed it. 

“You’ll enjoy it here,” he smiled, eyes shooting daggers at Jake, “It’s a really good college for sure.” 

Jake narrowed his eyes. Does this guy have a problem with me?

“Anyways,” Shotaro said, glancing down at his watch, “Sungchan is probably wondering where I am.” You gave him a soft smile and nodded, not wanting to keep him from his friends much longer, mostly now that Jake was at your side. Once Shotaro was out of sight, Jake released his arms from you. 

“Want to tell me why you were acting so jealous just now?” You asked, crossing your arms over your chest and you stared up at your boyfriend. 

Jake sighed, “Was I that obvious?” 

“Hmm” You hummed, “It was kinda cute though, at least you didn’t throw a punch this time.” 

Jake chuckled at the memory of the few punches he threw at Yeonjun that one night at the bar, “You’re right, I’ve come a long way since then.” 

You stood on your tippy toes and wrapped your arms around his neck, giving him a quick peck on the lips, “But there isn’t any need to be jealous, Sim Jaeyun, he was just being nice.” 

Jake slowly nodded, his fingers twisting the belt loops on your jeans, “Hard to not be jealous when my girlfriend has the sexiest ass in this whole place,” he whispered, his hands leaving the loops to cup your ass tightly. You shyly pull yourself away from him, looking around to see if anyone saw. 

Before you could even react, Jake had his hand in yours, pulling you off towards the hallway, “Hey, wait, where are we going?” 

“Either a bedroom or bathroom,” he smirked, “I need to make out with my pretty girlfriend in a more comfortable space.” You tried to hide the smile by thinning your lips in a line, you had to admit it was kinda hot with the way he was pulling you behind him, biting his lower lip, and showing everyone at this party his intentions. 

Who knew you’d enjoy being led into the closest bathroom this much. Liking the way Jake closed and locked the door behind you and lifted your body on top of the counter. Loving how pretty he looked with his lust-filled eyes, sliding his hands up your skirt and pulling your panties down as he sank to his knees, hands spreading your legs and lips attaching to your heat. Your hand attached to his hair, his eyes never leaving yours as he rubbed his tongue against your clit, two fingers slowly sliding into your cunt.

You threw your head back, biting your lip to suppress your moans. But Jake’s fingers pushed into you faster, his tongue flicking your clit faster and you failed to suppress any longer.

Your moans drowned out the music from the party, becoming the only thing Jake’s ears were able to focus on. His free hand palms himself through his jeans in the perfect rhythm of his fingers sliding in and out of you.

Jake was so in love with your pussy. You just tasted so fucking good, he couldn’t get enough. Palming himself wasn’t working anymore and struggled to unzip his jeans fast enough to pull out his pulsing cock from the clothing, his thumb spreading the precum over the tip but that also wasn’t enough. Jake lifted his hand to your face, pulling you down to look at him, his precum from his fingers spreading on your cheeks. “Spit,” he demanded, shivers sending down your spine from his breath hitting your heat.

You did as you were told, Jake losing himself even more at watching the way your saliva fell from your lips into his hand, “Good girl, so fucking dirty for me.”

You watched as Jake rubbed your spit over his cock as he moaned into your pussy, his lips attaching back to your clit, sucking on it gently as he slowly pumped himself, his fingers moving again inside you, following the same rhythm as the hand on his cock. Jake fucking loved the way your spit mixed with his precum as he fucked into his hand, it was the next best thing to having your mouth wrapped around him.

As much as you enjoyed the view and the feeling Jake was giving you, you knew you couldn’t hold on much longer. The knot in your belly threatening to snap. You rocked your hips against his face and fingers, “Jake…”

He moaned at his name being called from your lips, moving his fingers faster in you and sucking your clit harder, he knew you were fixing to cum, “Cum for me baby, make a mess on my tongue. Cum together with me.” Jake fucked into his hand harder and faster, feeling his own climax approaching. You couldn’t hold on much longer, letting the knot snap. Jake groaned a second later, cum sliding down his hand.

He pulled his fingers from your cunt, tongue licking your juices from his fingers then spread your legs further apart, his tongue pushing inside you, licking up the remaining of your cum that wasn’t on his fingers. You laid your back against the mirror, head spinning. Jake appeared in your vision, his hands reaching behind you and lifting you up and off the counter, pulling your panties back up over your hips and pressing a soft kiss to your forehead, “Let’s return to the party, everyone might be looking for us.”

-

The alarm clock buzzed from across the room, forcing you to lift your legs and place your feet flat against your boyfriend's back, using all your strength to push him off the edge of the bed with a massive thud. Jake let out a groan from pain, “What the fuck YN,” his sleepy raspy voice said, pushing himself to his knees and leaning his sleepy body onto the edge of the bed, eyes softly closing again. 

“Turn it off,” you mumbled. 

“Hmm?” 

“Turn off the damn alarm Sim Jaeyun!” 

“Okay, fuck. Jesus fucking Christ!” Jake stumbled his way to his dresser, slapping the off button for the alarm and silence finally settled in the room. 

You softly smiled as you rolled yourself in the middle of the bed, pulling the covers over your body. Jake stared down at you, his eyes raging. He walked to the end of the bed, gripping the bed sheets and yanking them off your body and the bed. 

You quickly sat up, your own pit of rage filling your eyes, “What the fuck?!” 

“If I have to be up, so do you!” Jake wasn’t just going to get up and get ready for the first day back to class and let you snooze until it was time for you to leave. 

Granted, he was going to let you sleep peacefully until it was time for you to head off to class, but after your stunt, nah! You won’t know any peace. You glared at him, fuck I should have kicked his ass harder.

Jake took your glare as a challenge, his cock softly twitching at seeing you angry with him. 

You’ve had fights before, sure. But Jake has never seen you so sleepy and pissed off at him in one emotion. He has to admit, it was kinda hot. With the way your tank top strap was sliding down your shoulder, the tank fitting so snug against your frame, and your nipples poking through the thin white fabric. The tank was short enough that it stopped right above your belly button and your night shorts rested perfectly against your hips as the silk flowered fabric bunched at the crease of your thigh. 

Jake thanked any god who was listening for giving him such a devil disguised as an angel. Your eyes widened as you watched Jake slowly crawl onto the bed, his bare chest softly glowing from the rising sunlight through his curtains. 

One of Jake’s hands found your shoulder, slowly pushing you back down onto the bed, his other hand touching your thigh, his fingers tracing up and stopping at the hems of your tank and pushing underneath it. His fingers grazed your nipple before cupping your breast, his face now inches away from yours. 

“Jake, you have class…” you whispered, realizing he’d be late if you pushed any further into his sexual antics. 

“Shhh,” his lips connected to your jawline, moving down to your neck. The hand that was on your shoulder was now down at your core, his fingers softly rubbing your folds, “It’ll be a quickie, I won’t be late.” 

His fingers were now sliding your shorts and panties to the side and spreading your cunts lips wide, “Please baby,” 

The way his voice was begging you made you completely soaked. How could you tell him no? Your fingers looped into his sweatpants and pulled them along with his boxers down. 

—

You pulled your wet hair behind your ears as you rushed into the kitchen trying to quickly slide your shoes on, your backpack sliding down your shoulder. Your brother stood at the counter, arms crossed over his chest as his eyes were glued to the toaster. 

Jay heard you open the fridge and pull a water bottle out, “What was the ruckus this morning about?” 

“Hmm?” you hummed at your sibling, confused about what he was talking about. 

The toast jumped from the toaster, Jay quickly pulled it onto a plate, “I heard you fighting with Jake earlier, can you pass me the butter packets from the fridge?” 

You nodded, pulling it from the fridge and handing him a couple, “His alarm was going off, so I kicked him out of the bed to turn it off.” 

Jay chuckled, spreading the butter onto the toast, “So that’s what the thump was, his body hitting the floor.”

Jake left about an hour ago, leaving you to quickly get ready for your classes alone. Due to the quickie you shared earlier, the bedsheets were a mess and you had to shower to clean yourself up. Cleaning the bedsheets came first, and then your shower second, and you still had a fifteen-minute drive to the campus. You were close to running late. 

You took notice of how Jay finished buttering the toast, quickly reaching around him and snatching it from his hands. “Stinks, what the fuck?” he hissed, watching his breakfast being shoved into your mouth. 

“I am running late, I need something to eat!” you said with a mouthful of the delicious toast. Your brother watched you grab your keys and run out the door. 

He sighed, “Yeah, I also have to eat before class,” he mumbled, “I’m the one who wanted to be closer to my baby sister, her stealing my food was bound to happen.” With a roll of his eyes, Jay pulled another piece of bread from the bag and slid it into the toaster. 

—

You walked quickly across campus, your new schedule in your hands.  You didn’t realize how big this campus really was. The last time you were here was when Jay was first moving here. You and your parents helped him pack up and move into his dorm room, but you put into any thought that driving to the dorms and walking across campus to find the building you needed were two separate things. 

Makes it worse that you and your roommates live off campus, forcing you to park in the student parking even further from where you needed to be. You wanted to call Jake and ask for help but knew you could not due to him already being in class. 

You knew Sunghoon and Heeseung left the apartment way before Jake did, but you still didn’t know their schedules either. Jay was still at the apartment due to not having class until a bit later. 

You stopped walking, pulling your phone from your jean pocket and scrolling to your roomie group chat, thumbs pressing against the screen as quickly as possible asking for literally anyone for help. 

“You look lost,” a familiar voice called to you. You glanced up to see Shotaro, and a friend standing beside him. 

“I’ll catch you later man,” Shotaro smiled at his friend whom you assumed was Sungchan, their hands connecting quickly for a shake as Sungchan walked off. Shotaro gave you a warm smile as he walked over to you, hands sliding into his jogger's pockets. 

You pouted, “Is it that obvious that I am lost?” 

Shotaro shook his head, looking off into the distance, “Nah, not at all.” 

You pinched his bicep, earning a soft laugh from him. 

“Please help me,” you pouted again, your lower lip curving downward. 

You looked way too cute for Shotaro to not help you. Plus better it be him than some random guy on campus. Jay and Jake would definitely not appreciate some random dude looking at you. Shotaro reached his hand out, “Let me see your schedule.” You handed it to him, watching as his eyes scanned the paper. 

“Medical Science student, huh?” he asked looking back up at you with an even bigger smile, “We have the same major.” 

Hearing those words made you relax completely. Knowing you had someone to help guide you around that you were comfortable with made this all the easier. 

He handed your schedule back to you, “It’s your lucky day, I am actually heading to that building now.” He tilted his head towards the direction of the building, signaling you to follow him. 

As you walked side by side, you both talked about your majors. Shotaro was a year above Heeseung and almost done with college as a whole. It didn’t surprise you at how smart he was or how passionate he was with his manor. It definitely made him more cute in your eyes. 

Shotaro enjoyed talking with you. You were a breath of fresh air from his friends and other classmates. It was really nice. He held the door of the building open for you, “Who do you have for genetics again? I can’t remember?” he asked, leaning over your shoulder to take a look at your schedule, “And what room number?” 

You hummed as you looked at the paper, “It looks like Mr. Lockin and in room 553.” 

“That’s upstairs,” he pointed towards the stairs, “My class is fortunately down here and fixing to start so I can’t walk you the rest of the way.” 

You smiled at him, waving your hand, “No that is perfectly fine! You’ve helped me a lot already, thank you Shotaro.” 

He gave you a nod and turned to walk down the hallway. You barely made it up three steps before the sound of his feet running echoed through the building, “Wait!” 

You turned and looked at him, the biggest smile on his face, “Taro.” 

You raised a brow, “Huh?” 

“Taro. You may call me Taro for short.” 

“You got it, Taro.” You gave him a wink and continued up the steps.

Shotaro watched and you disappeared onto the second floor before turning on his heels and going to his classroom. 

Thankfully for you, most of your classes were in this science building. You had roughly thirty minutes between your genetics and molecular biology classes which also thankfully were on the second floor. You used the restroom quickly and got a bag of chips from the vending machine before walking into your molecular biology class and to your surprise, saw Taro sitting by the window. You dropped your bag of chips onto the table, sitting down across from him. 

Taro tilted his head in his hands looking away from the window, his famous soft smile showing up, “Well look at that. Guess we have a class together after all.” 

“I am actually really glad for that,” you said nervously, reaching your hand into your chip bag, “Since my brother and friends all have different majors, I kinda already figured I wouldn’t have any classes with them.”

Taro’s smile faded a bit, she was scared to be alone. 

“At least you have me now, as a friend, of course, who also just happens to share your major. You won’t be alone, YN.” His words today knew exactly how to make you feel better. How did you get so lucky to make a friend like him and so quickly too? You offered him some of your chips, which he gladly took. 

You both giggled at the small awkwardness, your eyes darting outside the window, “This campus is pretty.” 

Taro met your gaze out the window and nodded, “I did tell you at the party the other day you would love this place.” 

You nodded in agreement, “It’s actually so…” 

Taro looked back at you to see why you stopped short in talking, seeing how saddened you looked now. 

“YN?” he called for you, his eyes darting back out the window, searching frantically for what you were looking at until they placed on what it was. 

Jake was standing on the sidewalk. It looked as if he just come from the Computer Sciences building. But Taro already knew that wasn’t what caught your eye in the first place. It was the two females that stood at his sides. One had their hand on his shoulder, while the other stood completely way too close to him. Jake thankfully wasn’t touching either of them. One hand was attached to his backpack strap, while the other was in his hoodie’s pocket. 

What angered Taro was the shit-eating grin Jake wore. And the fact he hasn’t removed the female's hand from his shoulder. Taro looked back at you, seeing the confusion writing all over your face as well as how glossy your eyes were starting to become. Taro bit his lip, debating on whether he should tell you the behaviors and reputation your boyfriend has here or let you figure it out on your own. 

He was praying that Jake has changed and left that playboy shit in the past. It was only the first day back on campus since spring break. After the winter break ended, Jake stopped attending parties, was going to your campus every weekend to visit you, and made b lines between his classes to hurry home to what he assumed would call and talk to you. Taro could also hope and pray that all that playboy shit was gone now that you’re on the same campus as him. But from what it looked like down below, nothing has changed so far. 

Eventually, Jake gave both ladies a nod, and slowly removed the female’s hand from his shoulder, giving a small wave before walking away, and pulling his phone from his pocket. A second later, your phone buzzed in your pocket, taking your eyes off him and to your device, seeing his name ID. 

You blinked a few times to dry up your almost tears, thumbs quickly sending a reply back to your boyfriend. 

Taro sighed, “Everything okay?” He wasn't sure exactly what to say, or what to even do to help lift your spirits, but he figured just being here for you would be enough for the moment. 

You nodded, “Yeah, it was just Jake. He just asked how my first day was going so far. Told him it was going well.” 

It broke his heart seeing you like this. But again, he knew he couldn’t metal in your relationship. 

Taro reached across the table, fingers grabbing your wrist, “Don’t let it bother you,” You just nodded. That’s when he noticed Jake’s necklace resting at your collarbones. For as long as Shotaro has known your brother and his friends, Jake never once removed that necklace from his neck. So the fact that it was now wrapped around yours, had to be proof Jake has changed. Just wait until his whores see the very necklace tied to you. 

“You’re prettier than them anyways,” Taro said, earning a small smile on your lips.

“What are you even saying?” you giggled, hiding your face between your hands. 

“I’m saying what I’m saying,” he laughed, “You’re prettier than those girls. Jake is a very lucky man.” Once again Taro knew exactly what to say to make you feel better. 

The professor walked in, signaling the start of class. 

—

The apartment was quiet except for the sounds of your and Jake’s lips connecting together. You both cuddled on the couch, arms wrapped around one another as Jake’s hand slowly slid up and down your back. Both your jeans and underwear are laid on the floor under the coffee table and a blanket covers your lower halves. Your right leg was wrapped around his waist, and he slowly pumped himself a few times inside of you to keep himself hard. 

It was an exhausting day for you both and all either of you wanted was to feel connected, and what better way would that be than to softly make out on the couch while you cock warm him?

There was something just so sexy about feeling him so deep inside you this way. Slowly rubbing your tongues together as your fingers twirled in his hair and his hands rubbed your back. 

Anytime you and Jake have cock warmed before, it always leads to soft sensual sex, but this time felt so different. You and Jake both didn’t feel the need to have sex right now, just wanting each other's presence and closeness. 

Jake only moved when he felt himself getting soft, slowly bucking his hips to feel the friction of your walls around him. Jake absolutely loved cock warming. Like he couldn’t even begin to explain how much he loved it. Just there was something about the way your cunt hugged him perfectly. 

“I love you,” Jake whispered, placing his forehead against yours, catching his breath. 

Your hand slid down from his hair and cupped his face, “I love you so much.”

You were happy for this moment, after seeing those girls around Jake and needing Shotaro to cheer you up, this was exactly what you needed to end your day. Thankfully none of the roomies were around. Leaving you and Jake completely alone. 

Heeseung was at work and Sunghoon had hockey practice and your brother? Hell if you knew. It was rare for you and Jake to have the apartment alone. There was always someone else home, or Jake was at work, or the four boys were all working leaving you alone. You still needed to find a job, but finding one in an unfamiliar place was hard. Which made you grateful for Jay not forcing you to get a job so quickly. 

Jake attached his lips back to yours, kissing you so sweetly and softly. That was until the front door busted open. 

You and Jake froze, staring into each other's eyes with the fear of how you were fixing to get caught on the couch. You knew it was your brother, it was too early for the other two to come home. Jake quickly pulled the blanket over your heads, “He’s going to fucking kill me.” 

It was one thing for Jay to know Jake was banging his little sister, but it’s another thing to get caught doing it. Trust, Jake learned that the hard way the first time. You went to shush your boyfriend, only for the shuffling of feet down the hall to stop you. Because it wasn’t just Jay’s feet, there was another pair. 

“Oh, fuck,” Jay breathed out, “Such a slut for this cock, ya?” 

A female's voice hummed and followed the sound of their lips smacking together, feet continuing to shuffle across the floor. You and Jake stared at each other wide-eyed. Ain’t no fucking way my brother just brought a girl home. 

You both sat still until the sound of your brother's bedroom door opened and closed. 

“What the fuck?!?” Jake mouthed, slowly pulling the blanket down from over your heads, seeing the coast was clear. Jake slowly pulled out of you, letting you get up first to pull your panties and jeans back over your hips as Jake did the same. The two of you sat in silence at hearing your brother in the other room. Jake found this way too hilarious while you were completely embarrassed. 

“Is this how my roommate felt when she’d return to the dorms but-“

“But heard me fucking you into the next dimension? Yep. More than likely.” Which is exactly why Jake found this so hilarious. It was just coming back at him full circle. 

And then the apartment fell silent again and Jay’s door opened slowly. Jay turned the corner of the wallway, stopping dead in his tracks at seeing the two of you sitting on the couch. 

“Whatchu doing in there buddy?” Jake teased. You thinned your lips into a line to stop yourself from laughing. Okay, maybe Jake was right in this being a little funny. 

The only thing Jay had on was his basketball shorts, his hand rubbing on his bare chest while the other ran through his dyed blonde hair. 

“Uhhh…” was all your brother could let out. His thumb pointed behind him to his bedroom, “How long have you guys been home?” 

Jake crossed his arms, a smirk playing so wide on his lips, “We were home WAY before you man.” 

Jay’s eyes looked between you and Jake, “Where?” 

“On the couch, the entire time.” 

Jay narrowed his eyes, “But I didn’t see either of you.” 

Jake grabbed the blanket you both were using earlier in his hand and lifted it up. 

“On the fucking couch?!” Jay snapped, his embarrassed expression leaving and replacing it with anger. 

“Oh no no,” you chimed in this time, “We weren’t doing anything, just cuddling until you and…whoever came home.” And his embarrassment came back. Oh, Jake was loving this. It wasn’t every day seeing Jay get like this. 

See, all four boys were used to each other bringing females in and out of the apartment. But they had rules set in place to keep moments like this from happening. The major rule was to make sure no one else would be in the apartment. Shoot a text, look for their cars in the parking lot of the apartment complex, double check work and sports schedules. 

Of course, they were allowed to sneak their quick fucks in while everyone was at home, but it at to be while everyone was sleeping, and not a peep could be heard. The rules didn’t change once you moved in, it would just have been harder for the other three boys to bring home a girl since you were pretty much always at the apartment. 

“Seongie!!~” the girl Jay brought home sang, her appearing behind him wearing his tee shirt and sweatpants. She also stopped short, seeing that others were home. And oh man was this rich. The girl Jay brought home was the female from earlier today who had her hand on Jake’s shoulder. 

“Naurrr way!” Jake clapped his hands, his Australian accent coming out thicker with his excitement, “I didn’t think you’d work this fast girl.” She half smiled, hiding behind your brother. 

You couldn’t hold in your chuckle, seeing this made you feel ten times better about earlier. All those girls wanted was your brother's attention and used your boyfriend to get it. If this situation couldn’t get any better, Sunghoon trailed into the apartment, his duffle bag and skates hanging from his hand while his hockey stick was clenched in the other, hair completely a mess and sweaty from his helmet. 

He kicked his shoes off at the door to turn around and see the sight before him. Jay, who was basically naked standing in the hall leading to their bedrooms with a girl he had no idea who she was. You and Jake sat on the couch, arms crossed and smirks on your faces. 

Sunghoon couldn’t help but look between the four of you, fully understanding what happened, “What the actual fuck,” was all he could sigh out, being too tired to fight at the moment. 

“I ummm…I’m going to change and leave,” the female said, quickly making her way to Jay’s room and leaving back in the clothes she came from and out the door. 

Jake had to bite his lips to keep from laughing, mostly at Sunghoon’s annoyed and tired expression. 

“We have rules,” Sunghoon mumbled with a groan, hanging his head low. 

“I know that!” Jay rolled his eyes, “I didn’t see either of their cars parked in front and assumed no one was home.” 

“Could have texted our group chat,” Jake said, raising his hands in a shrug, clearly still teasing the older. 

Your brother had enough, turning around and walking back to his room with a slam of his door. Damn, he must be very embarrassed. 

Sunghoon sleepily dragged his feet to the hallway, dropping his bag in front of his bedroom door, “Has anyone eaten yet?” he asked loud enough for Jay to hear him in his room, opening the door and throwing his duffle bag and skates by his dresser, “Can we order take out?” 

“Already on it!” Jay yelled from his room. 

“Good,” Sunghoon mumbled, now seating himself in the solo recliner chair, propping his feet up, “Least he could do for getting caught fucking.” 

Jake and you couldn’t hold in your laughter anymore. It was funny how the tables turned. 

—

The weekend finally came and instead of having a relaxing bath with a book in your hands to celebrate your surviving your first official week at your new college, you found yourself standing between your brother and boyfriend with Sunghoon and Heeseung standing in front of you, loud music filling your ears and lights from the club glowing from every angle. 

You have to always remind yourself that these boys lived a different life than you. They were all popular on campus and from what you remember seeing on Jay’s Instagram stories almost every weekend was him and the three stooges at some party, club, or bar. You should have expected nothing would have changed after you moved in. Yeah, Jake stopped attending these events after winter break to travel all those hours just to see you on the weekends, but now that you’re living under the same roof, it only made sense that the parties would continue. 

“Let’s get fucked up!” Heeseung cheered, handing everyone a shot glass.

“We all have work in the morning shit head!” Sunghoon yelled over the music, “Not too fucked up tonight!” 

Heeseung shrugged him off, holding the glass up, “CHEERS BITCHES!” 

You all clanked the glasses and swallowed the liquid. 

“ANOTHER!” Heeseung shouted, slapping his shot glass onto the bar counter, “Another round for me and my friends please!” he asked the bartender, who widely smiled and replied with a ‘got it, boss’. Heeseung handed the new round of shots to everyone, clanking the glasses and downing the liquid. 

Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. 

You could tell Jake was starting to feel the buzz by the way he sloppily wrapped his arms around your waist and nuzzled his face into your neck, “You’re the sexiest woman in this whole place.” he said, placing kisses up your neck and to your cheek. You leaned your head into him as he swayed you both back and forth to the beat of the music. 

Sunghoon ordered another round of shots. Didn’t he say to not get fucked up? 

Jake released you from his hold and took the shot down quickly. He snaked one arm around you, his hand sliding into the back pocket of your jeans, giving your ass a soft squeeze. 

The boys started talking about how their week back to class was shit and who was in which class and who had which professor. You tuned it out, being that you were the only one who wasn’t studying the same thing as they were. The four of them really took not being separated at the hip seriously. You let your eyes wander around the club, recognizing a few people you’ve seen on campus or in your classes, barely tuned into the people around you, clearly now feeling buzzed yourself. 

“Jakey!” 

Who the fuck. 

“Hey!” Jake answered back, darting your eyes at the female now standing in front of your boyfriend, “It’s been a minute!” You clocked the way he was being friendly and the way she was batting her eyes at him. 

Her hand reached up and touched his shoulder, “It’s nice seeing you back out at parties again!” You raised your brow, scooting yourself closer to Jake, your bodies now touching and Jake’s arm around you pulling you in tighter. 

“Yeah, I took a little break for a bit.” he chuckled. Took a break? Is coming to see me called taking a break??

She rubbed her hand on his shoulder, “What to hit the dance floor with me?” she blinked her eyes up at him, hinting she wanted more than just some dance. 

“Who are you again?” you asked, stretching the side of your head. 

Jay looked over at the perfect time to see the annoyed look on your face and the girl's hand on Jake’s shoulder. 

Oh, shit. 

The girl giggled, but not in a giggling cute way, but the bitch who do you think I am kinda way. “And you?” she scoffed, eyeing the way Jake had his arm wrapped around you. 

“I’m his girlfriend.” 

Jay felt his heart sink, slowly turning his body to fully face the three of you. He’s never seen you get like this over someone and needed to be ready for anything. Your tone of voice was enough for Jay to sober up. 

The female scoffed, eyeing between Jake and yourself, “Wait you’re serious?” 

Jake sighed, squeezing your hip, “Yeah, this is YN, my girlfriend.” Oh, you didn’t like the way he said that. 

Jay stepped in after that, “Yeah our Jake finally settled down!” he said with a laugh, removing her hand from Jake’s shoulder and giving him a stern look. 

“That’s a first for Sim Jaeyun,” she baffled, turning on her heels and walking away, “Guess I have to find another person to satisfy me now.”

“Excuse me?!” you snapped, taking a step forward.

“Woah woah woah,” your brother stepped in front of you, hands on your shoulders and Jake’s index finger looped into your jeans back pocket to pull you back, “She’s not worth it, YN, breathe…please.” 

You took a deep breath, eyes darting to your boyfriend, “Satisfy her? How many times?” 

“Baby, what?” Jake asked, his fingers tightening on your pants and pulling you closer to him. 

“How many times have you fucked her, Jake?” 

Heeseung choked on his beer, coughing at the sudden drop of that question. 

Jake stared into your eyes, trying to find the right words, “Only a few times?” 

“Only a few times?” you raised your brow, “The way she was talking didn’t seem like a few times.” 

Jake didn’t want to talk about his past sex life before you. It was the past for a reason. You were all that mattered now, none of the other women in this world mattered or compared to you. If he wasn’t already so buzzed from the alcohol in his system he’d be able to explain everything so much better to you. 

“Hey,” Sungchan said, nodding his head behind Shotaro, “Isn’t that yo girl over there?” 

Taro raised a brow in confusion but turned around nonetheless to see who he could be speaking of, his eyes landing on you. You looked upset and hurt. Taro could see the way you spoke to Jake and how he answered back that something was clearly wrong. And Shotaro could only guess what the problem could be. He shrugged, turning back around in his chair and tilting his beer bottle to his lips, “She ain’t my girl.” 

“That’s right because Sim has her wrapped around him.” Taro clenched his jaw at that, taking another look at you and Jake and the frustration that was not only on your face but also on Jay, Heeseung, and Sunghoon as the five of you talked amongst each other. “You like her, don’t you?” Sungchan asked, nudging Taro’s shoulder. 

Shotaro wasn’t sure how to answer that question. He thought you were cute, and funny and enjoyed being around you, sure. But you are a taken woman, and who was he to step in the middle of that just because he may or may not have feelings towards you? You are a friend, and that’s where it’s sitting. 

“I don’t,” Taro finally answered, taking another sip of his beer, eyes not leaving you. 

Eventually, Jay placed his hands on your shoulders, pulling you towards him and walking you away from the others and out the doors of the club. What a great big brother. 

Jake sat down on the bar stool and cupped his face between his hands. The world was spinning and the thought of you being pissed at him made the world spin that much faster, making him dizzy. 

“Man,” Sunghoon said, tapping his shoulder, “Should wear a sign that says “I am a taken man” above your head so everyone else gets the point. But on a real note, you have to make it better known to your past hookups. You did kinda just drop off the face of the earth to everyone but us after winter break.” 

Jake knew his friend was just teasing him, but Hoon’s words still stung nevertheless. He also knew Hoon was right, he did just stop showing up to parties and was even skipping class on most days just to spend extra time with you. The last thing Jake wanted was his past life to mix with his current one. And he knew it needed to change. 

You spent that night cuddled up against your brother. Laying your head on his back and arm wrapped over him, his hand held yours tight to his chest. Jay always knew what to do to help make you feel better. Your very first major breakup, he sat on the floor at your bedside and held your hand the entire night until you stopped crying and fell asleep. 

He used to tell you all the time that he remembers the first memory of you that his little brain was able to recall. Jay said you both were sitting on the couch with your mother. She held Jay as he held you. He remembers just sitting there, looking down at you, and his whole life changing even at that young age. You were so innocent and small and needed protection, the protection that only a big brother could give. And that was the day he swore to protect that smile he holds so dear. You are everything to him, after all. 

And Jay kept his word. Always being there with every heartbreak, every bad grade on a test, always right there ready to fight any bully that would pick on you, when you almost fell off the old trampoline as kids and Jay broke his arm in the process of catching you before you fell even though he’s the one who crashed arm first into the ground. All in the name of keeping you safe. 

You woke up that morning still lying on Jay’s back, his hand holding onto your pinky finger, slight snores leaving his lips. 

The apartment was quiet for the most part except for the shuffling of Heeseung and Sunghoon’s feet in the kitchen as they got ready for work and walked out the front door. You lifted your head and peeked over your brother's shoulder, seeing that it was now nine a.m. Jake should already be at work, Heeseung and Sunghoon just left, and Jay had to be awake in the next thirty minutes for work as well. Meaning you’d have the apartment to yourself today. 

Thirty minutes flew by and Jay’s alarm was blasting. You quickly pretended to still be asleep, not ready for him to ask you about last night just yet. You felt him shift in the bed, slowly release your pinky from his hand, and slide off the bed. He dragged his bare feet around his room, opening and closing his drawers and walking out of his room. The next sound you heard was the shower being run and Jay whistling his favorite song. Soon enough he was back in his room grabbing his phone and work shoes. He pulled the blanket up to your chin, tucking your hair behind your ear. 

“I love you, little sis,” he whispered, “Don’t be too hard on yourself or Jake, things take time.” You tried hard to not move, to not jump into his arms and cry into his chest and beg him to not go to work today, that you needed your brother here. He always knew the right things to say. Jay pulled a few more strands of your hair behind your ear then walked out of the room, closing the door behind him. 

Once you heard the front door close, you slowly sat up. Feeling the weight of pain from last night really hit you now that you were alone. You slowly slid out of your brother's bed, carefully making it for him and exiting his room. You walked down the hall and into the living room, stopping abruptly to see Jake hunched over on the couch. His hands were on the back of his neck and elbows on his knees as his head hung low, body rocking back and forth. 

Jake was still in the clothes he wore last night, his shoes kicked under the coffee table with pillows and blankets thrown on the other side. It was obvious your boyfriend slept on the couch instead of your shared bed. 

“Why are you home?” as much as you didn’t want to talk to him right now you knew you couldn’t avoid him either. You’d eventually have to talk about it. Your voice startled him, him quickly bringing his hands to his chest, ripping the shirt. 

Jake took a few deep breaths before answering you, “I called out of work,” you could tell by his voice how tired he was, that he hadn’t slept at all actually. 

Your heart broke for him, seeing him like this, “You could have slept in the bed…” you said softly. 

Jake was quick to shake his head as he slouched on the couch, “How could I have slept in our bed without you? How could I sleep when you weren’t there with me?” Well, it doesn’t look like you’ve gotten any sleep either way. 

You looked down at your bare feet, debating on either returning to your brother’s room or sitting on the couch with your boyfriend. 

“Baby, please,” You looked up at him, seeing the way his eyes were starting to gloss over, pleading with you, “It was only a couple of times and I cut her off so fast and way before winter break even happened.” 

Which was true. Jake, putting it truthfully, got bored with her. Before you, Jake couldn’t stand clingy bitches and that’s exactly what she was. Only hit him up when some other dude couldn’t hit it right and would stick around hours afterward trying to get to know his friends and cling to him the whole day. It was exhausting. Jake only used the sex as a way to keep himself busy if he was being honest. It never meant anything. Nothing meant anything until he met you. 

“I don’t give a damn about her, never did. You are all that matters. You’re everything to me. Baby, I can’t take you being mad at me it fucking kills me.” You looked away from him, feeling maybe you were too harsh on him. It was all before the two of you anyway. Your fingers traced his necklace, dropping it to your collarbone. Your feet started moving towards him. 

Jake sat up straight, arms reaching out for you as you climbed into his lap. His arms found their home wrapped around your waist as yours did around his neck. He nuzzled his face into your neck, kissing the skin and softly whispering “I am so so sorry baby,” in between the kisses and wrapping his arms even tighter around you. 

Jake was a mess and his lack of sleep was making him even more emotional about this situation. He tried to sleep, he really did. But the bed felt too big with your body missing. Even the couch felt too big without you pressing against him with his head on your chest listening to the sound of your heart beating to put him to sleep. 

Jake’s hold on you got tighter and a small hiccup escaped from his lips. “Hey, no no,” you whispered, pulling back far enough to cup his face and place your forehead to his, thumbs rubbing his cheeks, “I am right here, it’s okay.” 

“I can’t do this without you,” he said, biting his lip, “You’re everything.” 

You lifted his face up for his lips to meet yours, kissing him softly, “I love you.” 

Jake deepened the kiss, his hands now resting at your hips, “Baby, I am so stupid in love with you.” 

You smiled against his lips, feeling his fingers slip under your shirt. You felt him get hard underneath you, giggling as he pulled your shirt over your head. He was obviously tired. His kisses were sloppily and the way he ran his hands over your body so softly was another tell that he was barely holding on. Exhaustion hit Jake so hard after you crawled into his arms, but feeling your touch was enough to make him hard and want you badly regardless of how tired he was from his sleepless night. 

“Babe,” you whispered as his fingers unclasped your bra, disregarding it to the floor, hands returning to cup your breasts, “You’re exhausted, you need rest.” 

“Shhh,” he hushed, thumbs slowly rubbing over your sensitive nipples, “Have sex with me, I want to feel connected to you right now.” 

You smiled at him, your fingers reaching for the buttons of his jeans, unclasping it and helping him slide them down to the floor, lifting yourself up and removing your own shorts and panties. Jake lined himself up with your entrance, letting out soft moans as you slid down on him filling you up completely. You slowly rolled your hips against him, his gasps from the pleasure sending chills down your body. 

Soft makeup sex became one of his favorite types of sex. The intimacy of it made his heart feel so warm and full. You wanted to make him feel good, mostly after the night you clearly could see he had. You lifted yourself and softly bounced on his cock, his hands squeezing your hips and biting his bottom lip. Jake’s mind was lost in a daze at the sensation, his eyes trailing to his necklace and how it bounced against your skin. 

You lifted up ready to slide back down on him, when his lips attached to your nipple, his tongue rubbing against it. Your fingers found their way into his hair, your back arching, and his hands holding onto your lower back, giving him even more access to your tits. 

His mouth went to work on your nipple, his teeth biting down softly on it, wrapping his lips around your skin and slightly sucking. Your jaw went slack, hips rolling against him. 

“Bounce on my cock baby,” the vibrations of his voice against your tit sent more chills down your body, your pussy clenching around him. You bounced on him again, his mouth not leaving your tit. 

The way his cock was hitting your g-spot as his mouth sucked on your nipple was edging you closer to your organism. Jake knew you were close to cumming by the way your pussy clenched around him, he too wanted to cum. Usually, he would last longer or want to last longer, but his exhaustion was getting worse by the minute. 

Finally removing your tit from his mouth, he laid back against the couch, hands squeezing your hips and fucked up into you. His thrusts were sloppy but felt so good nevertheless. His lips found yours again, moaning into your mouth as his load pumped inside you, your organism following right after. 

Jake hung his head back on the couch, breathing heavily, “Your pussy feels good even when I am this exhausted.”

You slid him out of you, standing up and pulling your clothes back on your body, “Jake, babe let’s go to bed, ya? You need sleep.” 

Jake slowly nodded, pulling himself from the couch and pulling his boxers over his hips. You picked up his shoes and jeans, taking his hand in yours and leading him to your shared room. Jake was asleep the minute his head hit the pillow and arms were wrapped around you with your head on his chest. 

—

Shotaro kept looking at you throughout the class. Watching the way your hair fell in your face when you’d look down to write something in your notebook. Noticing how you’d sigh every ten minutes or so when your eyes would dart out the window. You seemed in a better mood than over the weekend, and from what he noticed from your Instagram account when you tagged Jake in a post on your story, it was obvious the two of you made up. 

But he could still see that small amount of hurt in your eyes with how you’d look out the window as if waiting to see Jake walk out of class with a female attached to him. Taro pulled his phone from his pocket, trying to hide his phone the best he could under the table. 

Your phone vibrated in your pocket, your eyes slowly looking up to Taro, his head tilting down to signal to answer your texts. 

Taro: everything okay? You looked back up at him, he gave you a soft smile.  You: yes, just peachy! Taro: yn…I know you’re not. 

You bit your bottom lip. You might not have known Shotaro for very long, but you got close quickly. It surprised you how he knew how your emotions worked already. 

You: just had a fight with Jake over the weekend, everything is fine now. I promise :) Taro: it’s still bothering you though, isn’t it?

You didn’t know how to respond. Mostly because of course, it did. You understood Jake’s sex life before you wasn’t any of your business. But that still doesn’t mean it hurt any less, more so because his hookups don’t seem to know he’s a taken man now. Hinting why they are all over him still. Jake removed all of them from his Instagram and blocked them completely and set his account to private, which yes made you feel better, but why did it all still bother you? You have him in the end and he’s literally in love with you. 

Taro: you start your job at the campus library today right? why don’t we hit up the campus cafe and get some coffee before you go? it’ll cheer you up. 

You smiled, shoving your phone back in your pocket and giving him a nod. You haven’t gotten to try the famous cafe yet. Mostly since right after classes were finished for the day you’d always just head home or wait for your brother and the three stooges at either your favorite picnic table by the art building since it had so many pretty statues and art pieces around the area, or in the cafeteria for a quick lunch together before everyone went to either sport practices or their jobs and you home. But obviously, now that would change. You finally got hired at the campus library thanks to Shotaro. He saw the ad for it on the bulletin board in the main office and knew you’d be great at it. 

Shotaro sat across from you at the table, handing you the coffee he told you would be a surprise, with a strawberry cheesecake. 

“These two are the best in this cafe,” he said, watching as you look at the coffee, twirling it in your hands.

“What is it?” you asked. You weren’t exactly picky when it came to coffee, but you definitely were more on the sweet side of coffee than the strong and bitter side. 

Taro just smiled, digging his fork into the strawberry cheesecake, “Just try it, you’ll love it I promise.” 

You noticed he got the same drink as you, figuring it had to be good if he liked it this much. You placed the straw between your lips, slowly taking in the cold iced coffee. You hummed in enjoyment, it was only an iced mocha, but it was damn well the best iced mocha you’ve ever tasted. 

Taro smiled even more, taking a sip of his mocha and then shoving the cheesecake in his mouth, “I told you so!” 

You rolled your eyes at your new best friend, “Yeah yeah, shut up.” 

It was your turn to try the cheesecake, reeling in pure bliss at how wonderful the pastry tasted. Shotaro was right, you had to admit that. After a couple more laughs, the cheesecake was nonexistent. 

Taro sat back in his chair, a serious look now on his face, “Want to tell me what happened with you and Jake at the club?” 

You squeezed your straw between your fingers, “How do you know about that?” 

He shrugged, “Sungchan and I were also there. We saw the two of you fighting and Jay leaving with you.” 

You just slowly nodded, “I found out about one of his past hookups, she came up to him while we were at the bar and had no clue who I even was.” Shotaro felt his body tense, he knew it was only a matter of time before one of Jake’s whores dared to approach him with you wrapped around him. 

“YN…” 

“I get it was from his past and was before me, so you don’t have to say that.”

Shotaro leaned forward, “I wasn’t going to say anything like that.” 

You felt bad for snapping at him. You’ve had this conversation with Jay on the drive home from the club that night and thought Taro was on that track. 

You sigh, dropping your face in your hands, “I’m sorry, Taro. I didn’t mean to snap at you.” 

“YN, I get it, okay? It hurts and it sucks.” 

You nodded, feeling his hands tear away from your face to look at him, his famous soft smile being the first thing you saw. 

“I obviously don’t want you to get hurt, but it’s going to keep happening,” Shotaro didn’t know why he was telling you what he was fixing to, but he felt this need to protect you, “Jake was…well is, a very popular guy. He used to have his arm wrapped around a different girl every day. Multiple make-out sessions back to back at parties.” 

You shrugged, already figuring that did happen. You’ve seen Jay’s Instagram stories before winter break happened, and you knew Shotaro wasn’t lying to you. But still hearing it ached in your chest. The four boys you’ve grown up with already had their fair share of girls even before they graduated. They were all good-looking guys. You’ve even had your fair share of one-night stands and hooking up with the same guy a couple of times. But the moment you moved in things seemed to have changed. The boys respected you and weren’t having many hookups, but maybe that was just because you were always at the apartment or they were too busy watching you like a hawk at parties. 

“Taro, I appreciate you looking at me,” you softly said, smiling at him.

“Of course, just…don’t let the other females get to you. I know it will hurt, but eventually, they’ll take the hint.” 

You nodded, checking the time on your phone, “I have to go, thank you for the coffee and cheesecake. It really did make me feel better.” 

Taro watched as you stood up, leaning over to grab your things, Jake’s necklace shining from the sunlight hitting it. And all he could do was pray Jake doesn’t fuck up. 

—

The rest of the week went by like normal for the most part. Your job came easy to you. It was mostly just returning the books to their respective shelves, which honestly was the hardest part of figuring out the layout of the library and which book type goes where. But you got the hang of it quickly. 

You spent the first few couple nights doing nothing but studying the map of the library. You sat on the floor between the coffee table and couch with Jake’s legs on either side of you, your eyes scanning every inch of the map. His fingers brushed through your hair and left kisses on your cheek, whispering how proud he was of you. 

Today's shift was until closing, meaning you’d get back to the apartment late. Thankfully you weren’t by yourself. Another student who was in the physical therapy program with Heeseung. He’s a little cutie and his smile made you want to punch his dimpled cheeks. 

“There’s quite a few RTS (return to shelf) at the front desk that need to be taken care of,” Jungwon said with a stack of books in his hands, “Do you mind doing it? I have to inventory these before we close up for the night.” 

You nodded, “Yeah, of course, anything I can do after RTS?” There were still two hours before the library closed.

Jungwon set the stack of books down, fiddling with the keys in his pocket, handing them to you, “Lock up the study rooms on the second floor?” 

You nodded again, “You got it won.” 

He gave you his dimple smile, slapping the stack of books, “Off I go, wish me luck.” You wished him luck, watching him walk to the back office. 

You walked around the library, gathering all the books off the desks and tables and then the ones at the front desk. One by one you returned each book to its home on the shelf, running up the stairs to double-check the study rooms, seeing they were empty and closing and locking them up. You checked your watch, there was a little over an hour left. 

As you walked down the stairs, your eyes met with a pair of eyes staring back at you from the service desk, his smile so wide you could have sworn that the sun was still shining. 

“Hey baby!” your boyfriend coos, leaning his elbows on the desk, “How much longer until you’re mine?” 

You smiled up at him, “Only an hour, why are you here?” 

He smiled even wider, “The new Lego Marvel set came out.” You rolled your eyes, you should have known. 

Jake lifted the Lego bag from the floor, setting it on the desk, “Heeseung doesn’t know yet, so don’t tell him. Gonna surprise him tomorrow, we are going to build it together.” 

You looked at him with endearment, his smile warming your heart, “I’ll keep the secret,” you gave him a wink, “But why did you go buy legos and then come back to the campus?” 

“I wanted to see you,” Jake said, reaching for your hand, his thumb rubbing your palm.

You giggled at him, “You’ll see me at home,” 

“I didn’t want to wait,” his smile only made you fall even harder for him than you already were. It was true, the whole time he was at the Lego store all he wanted was to have you by his side, helping him pick out a box. Jake even found these cute keychains of half hearts so when you connect them together the heart is completed. How could he not have gotten them?

“Can I see your keys?” He said letting go of your hand and lifting his palm upwards. 

You raised a brow at him, “Why…??”

“Park YN, let me see your keys.” 

You gave him a look as you reached for your purse from under the desk, pulling the keys out and handing them to Jake. You watched as he pulled a keychain from his hoodie pocket, connecting it to your key between the apartment key and your car key. He dangled the keys in front of you, showing the Lego half heart, “I have one too,” pulling out his own keys, “We are matching, and they connect together.” If you weren’t at work you’d kiss him right now. 

“Jake, this is so sweet. Thank you, babe.” 

Jake places your keys back in your hands then reaches up and rubs his thumb against your cheek, “I’ll see you when you get home, have a good rest of your shift.” You nodded, your eyes not leaving him as he walked out of the library with his Lego bag. 

You did a final walk around the library, cleaning up any other books or trash. The library doors opened, and a group of girls walked in. Which annoyed you, there were thirty minutes left until it was time to leave, but unfortunately, you had to let them in. It would just be another mess to clean up later. What annoyed you more was hearing the voice of that girl from the club that one weekend. 

“Well well, fancy seeing you again,” her annoying ass voice said as she walked over to you at the service desk, “So you do attend this college, I was thinking it over on how Jake could have possibly started dating someone from another campus.” 

You narrowed your eyes at her, “I transferred here over spring break.”

She giggled, “How did the two of you meet? How did you manage to bag something all the girls on campus want?” 

You tilted your head at her, getting more annoyed, “We’ve known each other our whole lives,” you spat, “he’s my older brother's best friend. I’ve seen Jake grow up.” You didn’t know why you were telling her this information, but something about rubbing it in her face that you’ve known him your whole life and were able to bag the shit out of him, and seeing the look on her face while you said it satisfied you so much. 

“Ahh,” was all she could say, “You’re Jay’s little sister, that makes so much more sense. I knew you looked a little familiar. You have your brother’s nose.” So I’ve been told multiple times. 

You just stared at her, imagining what it would look like if your fist connected to her all-too-perfect nose. 

“Anyways,” she sang, “I was looking for a book,” 

“We are closing soon,” you snapped. 

She hummed, giving you a smirk, but then her smile faded when her eyes saw Jake’s famous necklace around your neck. It was your turn to smirk, your head being held high, you won this match. “He’s…good in bed, isn’t he?”  Excuse the fuck out of me???

You laughed, “Excuse you?” 

“You heard, little miss Park,” oh you wanted to snap her neck, “He’s good in bed.”  You balled your first and her friends giggled. “Has he hit it from behind?” You furrow your eyes, what kind of question was that? Of course, Jake has railed you from behind, multiple times. What is this bitch getting at? You just looked at her, anger set ablaze. 

“Word of advice, he loves fucking while spooning, BUT your hands have to be in his hair, pulling it. Drives him crazy, never seen a man cum so fast.” 

That was it. You lost your cool. You started to walk around the service desk, but Jungwon’s hands were there to wrap around your wrist, pulling you back. All the girls smirked. Jungwon hissed at them to leave, following directly behind them and locking the doors. You fell to the floor, legs way too weak to stand straight anymore. Jungwon was at your side, helping you up, “Don’t mind them, they harass any female that has caught Jake, Heeseung, Sunghoon, and your brother's attention.” Damn, my whole family? No wonder that bitch had it out for you. You were living the dream she wished she had. 

Jungwon let you leave early, comforting you that he’d be okay locking up alone. You were going to ignore it, ignore them. But you found yourself snatching your phone and dialing a number. 

“Hello?” Taro’s sleepy, raspy voice answered. He was asleep, and now you felt bad waking him. 

“Oh never mind, I am sorry I woke you.” 

“No no no!” you heard the rusting of his bed sheets, “What’s wrong? I can hear it in your voice.” And you lost it. The wall you’ve held up to keep from crying ever since you first started noticing the kind of attention Jake was getting finally broke. The tears streamed down your voice. “YN, where are you?” Taro said quickly jumping from his bed, pulling his sweatpants over his boxers, and slipping his shoes on. 

You shook your head, “No, I just needed to hear a comforting voice.”  You don’t know why Shotaro was the first person you thought of to call. Maybe because you knew if you called your brother, Sunghoon, or Heeseung, they would beat Jake into the next year. 

“YN, princess, what happened?” 

You softly smiled at the pet name, “Princess huh?” 

Shotaro sighed, pinching his fingers on the bridge of his nose, “That just slipped out, I am so sorry.” 

You giggled, “No it’s fine. It’s all innocent.” 

Shotaro stared off into blank space, Jake would one hundred percent kill him if he knew he called his girlfriend princess. 

“Anyway,” he cleared his throat, “Please tell me what happened?” 

You didn’t expect to, but you did. You spilled everything. He leaned against his bed frame, listening to you speak. His hand rubbed his forehead in frustration. Shotaro tried his best to help you with that situation, telling you to just ignore them, that you deserved better than that. You just shrugged your shoulders, saying the situation is just shitty and that it is what it is. 

“Hey,” he said, “Why don’t you come help me at the school’s fair tomorrow? I know it’ll be Saturday and you probably have plans but, you could help me run the sciences booth.” 

You agreed, knowing that Jay works tomorrow, Sunghoon is going home for the weekend to see his family and Jake has plans with Heeseung. You had nothing else to do anyway. 

The drive home went quickly, and if you’re being honest, you don’t remember how you got up the stairs and into the apartment. But you were now standing in the doorway of your shared room with Jake. He was asleep, soft snores leaving his lips. Pieces of his dark hair fell into his eyes. Arms stretched out in front of him as he slept on his side. 

You smiled at him. You knew none of this was his fault. That those girls being that way towards you wasn’t under his control. You closed the door behind you, sliding your work clothes off your body. That girl's words played on repeat in your head. It bothered you to no end. 

Jake has spooned fucked you before in terms of trying to be quiet during his visits when your old roomie didn’t go sneak off to her boyfriend. But it hasn’t happened since. There hasn’t been a need to. Jake and you could have any type of sex you wanted and not worry about a damn thing. There wasn’t any need for that sneaky sex. 

But it kept running through your mind. And honestly, you wouldn’t mind being cuddled fucked at the moment. You unclasped your bra and slid your underwear down, slowly walking to your shared bed. The endearment you felt for him watching him sleep peacefully made you feel all warm. Your fingers softly push his hair out of his face. 

“Hmm,” he hummed, feeling your touch, “You’re home?” his raspy voice whispered, him not opening his eyes. 

“Hmm,” you hummed back, lifting his right arm up so you could climb in. Once you were settled on the bed and under the covers, his hands wrapped around you, feeling your naked body. 

“Fuck baby,” he whispered in your ear, his hands cupping your breast, “Why are you naked?” you could feel his cock hardening just by feeling your bare skin. 

“I just wanted to surprise you,” you whispered back, rolling your ass into his crotch, “Needed to feel you,” 

He squeezed your breasts, his thumbs rolling over your sensitive nipples, “Fuck baby,” his lips found your bare shoulder, leaving open-mouth kisses trailing up to your neck and then your ear, “All this for me? All for my cock?” You nodded and his fingers trailed down, splitting your folds open, rubbing your clit. 

Jake had to admit this was one of the sexiest things you’ve ever done for him. Waking up to see his beautiful girlfriend naked and wet for him? Jeez, this was fucking heaven. And it made him desperate. 

“Climb on top of me,” he whispers, ready to roll over to his back and see you ride him. 

“No,” you shake your head, hand reaching behind you to the hem of his boxers, “Fuck me like this.” Oh LAWWD this was so fucking hot for Jake. 

“What’s gotten into you tonight baby?” he asked, hands quickly sliding down his boxers, his hard cock pressing against your ass, “It’s so fucking hot.” His words sent chills down your spine, and your heat clenching, so ready for him. His hand lifted your thigh up and over his leg, using it as a way to keep you spread for him. Your hands gripped the bedsheets feeling his tip at your entrance and slowly pushed inside you. 

“Oh fuckkkkk” Jake whined as he bottomed out, his hand squeezing your hip tightly. He slowly grinded into you, setting a good pace. 

“Your pussy f-feels so good wrapped around me fuck.” he moans out, bucking his hips at a faster pace. Now was as good of a time as any. You reached up behind him, fingers tangling in his hair, and softly pulled. 

“Oh fuck, oh fuck,” he groaned, his grip on your hip tightened as he fucked up into you faster.

You were starting to see stars from how fucking good it felt as he pounced into you, “Your cock feels so good, so good.” you whined, pulling his hair even harder. 

“Fuck YN, baby pull it harder oh fuck pleaseeee.” 

You did just that. Pulling as hard as your arm could in this position. He abused your pussy with the pace he was going, so hard and fast, hitting your g-spot perfectly. You reached your fingers to your clit, rubbing at the same pace as his hips bucking into you. 

You felt his dick twitch. “M’cumming baby, fuck, cumming.” 

“Me too,” you moaned, releasing onto his cock and a second later his seed painted your walls, your pussy milking his cock of every last drop. 

“Fuck,” was all Jake was able to manage to push out, his head spun from how fast he came. You took deep breaths, heart racing. 

Jake wrapped his arms back around you, nuzzling his face in your neck, “Fuck that was so hot.” You agreed, leaning into him. The only good thing that came out of that bitch running her mouth is you have found another way to pleasure your boyfriend. 

—

Jake sat at the kitchen table with Heeseung, a good one thousand pieces of legos spread through the whole table. Heeseung and Jake had major smiles on their faces as they laughed and built the marvel set together. 

“Brother, how were you even able to get this that fast? It literally released yesterday!” Heeseung asked, his fingers pushing to pieces together. 

“Well, I may or may not have placed an online preorder and just picked it up.” Jake smiled up at his hyung.

Heeseung just shook his head, “You're crazy for spending that money.” 

“Hey!” Jake scoffed, “It was well worth it!” Heeseung patted his back, agreeing with a nod. 

“Too bad Sunghoon is missing out,” Heeseung laughed, “Jay too.” 

Jake shrugged, piecing together the legos to the ones Heeseung just had, “I tried to get Jay to call out today, but he wouldn’t listen.” 

Jake always loved building legos with them, it was some of his fondest memories as a child growing up. Speaking of childhood, Jake was concerned as to why you hadn’t left the room all morning yet. But as if on cue, you walked from the shared bedroom, dressed up a little too nice for Jake’s liking, you headed towards the front door. 

“Wait! Hey!” Jake shouted quickly, you turning to face him and Heeseung. Jake took a moment to take in your outfit. Ripped skinny jeans, your favorite pair of white sneakers, a red tank top that hugged your body snug, and Jake’s black zip-up hoodie, “First off, that’s my hoodie, secondly, where are you going?” 

You smirked at him, “What’s mine is yours, right baby?” Oh, I am definitely going to ruin her later. 

Jake smirked back, “Yes, now answer the second question baby girl.” 

You shrugged, adjusting the sleeves of Jake’s jacket, “To the school’s fair.” 

Jake looked at you with confusion, why would you want to go to that? It was just something for some students to show off their majors to other students and families who wanted to go. It wasn’t anything special at all. Before Jake could protest and beg you to stay home with him, you quickly kissed his cheek goodbye and were out the door. 

“Since when did she care about that fair?” Jake mumbled, going back to the legos. 

“Probably to hang out with Osaki.” 

Jake dropped the lego pieces, looking up at Heeseung, “What did you say?” 

Heeseung just shrugged, “She’s been hanging with Osaki a lot lately. They have a class together.” Well, no shit! I already knew she had a class with him. 

“What do you mean hanging out with him?”

Heeseung sighed, “I saw them at the school's cafe not too long ago. I don’t think they saw me though. He was also at the club that night. Saw him staring.” Heeseung thought nothing of this or saw anything wrong with you hanging out with Shotaro. You needed other friends besides the four of them, plus Shotaro is a good kid. But unfortunately Jake didn’t see it that way. Why have you never told him you were hanging out with him? 

Heeseung could see the gears turning in Jake’s brain, “Man whatever you’re thinking, stop it.” 

Jake sat in silence, sitting back in the chair, “Why didn’t she tell me about the cafe?” 

Heeseung just shrugged, “It probably was a one-time thing. Does she know Stella came by the apartment the other day looking for you?” 

Jake sighed, “No…Haven’t gotten to tell her.” 

Heeseung shrugged again, “Maybe she just didn’t tell you yet either. Don’t make a big deal about it. She has your necklace wrapped around her neck twenty-four seven, every man on campus knows who she belongs to.” Everyone but Shotaro.

“Anyways,” Heeseung said, picking the Legos back up and wanting to change the topic, “Jay’s birthday is in two weeks, what are we planning?” 

Jake couldn’t focus on that right now, no matter how hard he tried, “I dunno, maybe we’ll just throw a party or take him out or something.” 

Jake stood from the table, grabbing his keys from the key drawer. 

“Come on man,” Heeseung groaned, “You’re leaving me?” 

“Come with then,” Jake said blankly, hand gripping the front door and Heeseung trailing right behind him. 

Shotaro was glad you decided to come today. He was worried at one point you only agreed out of sadness and would cancel on him later, but seeing you here smiling happily at all the families and other students, it made him happy.  

The science booth wasn’t directly something connected to your and his major and more sciencey for the kids. 

Shotaro had a few plasma balls set up, with a board explaining the charges and how it all works. 

It was really getting the kids going. 

The major battery that was powering up the plasma balls was running low, giving a loud beep as the hint. 

“We don’t have an extra battery,” you said to Shotaro, your hands digging through the small boxes that everything came in, “It’s not here at all.” 

Taro thought for a minute, “Oh! there’s one in the science lab of the physics part of our building, it should be charged and in one of the closets.” 

You nodded, quickly sprinting your way toward the physics building. 

Jake’s eyes trailed every booth at the fair, watching all the different families interact with the students and professor. He had to admit it was pretty cute. No wonder you wanted to come. 

Heeseung got distracted by a mini arcade basketball game that was set up beside other games, “I’ll catch you later Jake!” he said, slapping his friend's shoulder, “I’m gonna shoot some hoops.” 

Jake nodded, “I’m going to find YN then I’ll be back.”

Unfortunately right when you walked off to find a spare battery, Jake found Shotaro’s booth. 

Taro was busy explaining the plasma ball to a kid and didn’t notice Jake was standing nearby until the kid and her family left. 

Taro’s smile faded and disappointment flooded him. 

“Osaki,” Jake said, stepping closer to the booth. 

“Sim,” he replied back. 

Jake shoved his hands into his jacket pocket, eyes darting around the area, “Where is my girlfriend?” 

Shotaro tried to not snicker at Jake calling you girlfriend, “She went to grab something for the booth.” 

Jake slowly nodded, showing his annoyance, “Did she come here because you invited her?” 

That made Shotaro laugh, “Jealous are we?” 

Jake locked his jaw and clenched his fist, Shotaro wanted to laugh even more. How could Jake be so brave to come here and act this way when he’s causing you pain? 

“Chill out,” Taro said, “I am joking.” 

Jake just shook his head, “What do you want with my girlfriend?” 

There he goes name-dropping her as girlfriend again.

“Your girlfriend,” Shotaro emphasized, “Is a close friend of mine. I invited her today to help cheer her up.” 

Oh that didn’t sit okay with Jake, “The fuck you mean—“ 

“Did she not tell you at all?” Taro interrupted, then sighed as he realized you never told Jake about yesterday, the look of confusion all over his face, “You need to get your whores under control.” 

Jake narrowed his eyes, “Excuse you?” 

Shotaro rolled his eyes, hands gripping the table, “Stella and her bitch squad,” he snapped, “They went to the library yesterday and harassed YN. Spitting out all kinds of shit from your past sex life with Stella. She called me crying after she got off work.” 

Jake’s eyes widened, his body tensing up. Last night made so much more sense now. The way you crawled into bed naked, how you demanded he fuck into you from behind like that, and the way you gripped his hair…Jake was too fucked out in that moment to realize it. It also hit him that you didn’t call him about it, or mentioned it when you got home. 

Stella was always a problem for Jake. Fucked around with her only a couple of times and she acted like the two of them were official. She was clingy in the worst way possible and would always throw a fit when she caught wind of Jake sleeping with another girl. He got bored of her and her fucked personality so quickly. Jake wanted to forget about the night he cut her off and the way she got so mad at him. He only stayed “friends” with her as a way to not deal with the bullshit. Jake hoped after he dipped from the party life for a bit, she would have caught the hint. Mostly after that night at the club, but guess not. 

Shotaro scoffed, “Got nothing to say now?” 

Jake clenched his fist again, “Just stay away from my girlfriend.” He went to turn and leave, to go and find you himself. 

“Hard to do when I have a class with her,” 

Oh, he wanted to get hit.

Shotaro smiled at the way Jake whipped back around, “She deserves better.” 

His words hit Jake hard, making his body deflate. 

Jake opened his mouth to say something, but your hand touching his back, made him stop. 

“Babe, you decided to come?” your smile and the way you looked up at him made his heart melt. All Jake wanted to do was pick you up and cuddle you. Whisper how much he loved you in your ears and plaster kisses all over your sweet face and apologize for Stella. 

But he didn’t, Jake just smiled, wrapping his arm around you, “Yes, Heeseung is here too.” 

Your eyes brightened, “Where is he?” You were actually genuinely happy Jake and Heeseung showed up. There were a few food stalls and games you wanted to try with them both. 

“He found some arcade basketball game,” Jake pointed towards the direction, “He’s over there.” 

You wanted to go, wanted to challenge Hee to a basketball game, but you also didn’t want to leave Taro alone. 

You looked over at your friend, him smiling softly at you like he always did, “Go ahead. You’ve helped me a lot already.” 

“Are you sure?”

Taro nodded. You smiled at him back, handing him the extra battery, and took off running towards Heeseung. 

“Don’t fuck it up, Sim,” Shotaro said, watching you with Heeseung. 

Jake looks at Shotaro, glaring at him, “Why does it matter to you?” 

He smiled, watching as you shoot the basketball, and shoved Heeseung, “I care about her. I have to see her sad and disappointing face every time Stella or some other female makes a pass at you. I have to watch it kill her.” 

Jake didn’t know what to say or do except look away, watching as Heeseung picked you up and threw you over his shoulder. 

“So don’t fuck it up,” Taro said again, this time facing Jake, “I don’t want to have to beat your ass if she comes crying to me one more time.” 

Jake scoffed, “Right. Stay away, besides the classes you have with her. I can protect my girlfriend without you.” 

Shotaro just shrugged and nodded, “Do your thing then man. Just keep Stella under control, ya?” 

With one final glare, Jake walked away. Taro’s “She deserves better,” ringing in his ears. 

Jake knows what you deserve, and it was to be with him. He made you happy, he knows that. And he knows that he’s fucked up when it comes to Stella. Jake will have to put a stop to Stella’s antics once and for all. 

But right now, all he cares about is joining the wrestling match between you and Heeseung. 

—

Jay groaned and dropped all his weight to the floor, Heeseung, Sunghoon, and Jake, caught him before he actually hit the floor. 

“Get the fuck up!” Sunghoon snapped, sliding his hands under Jay’s arms, “Someone get his legs!” 

Heeseung and Jake both reached for your brother's legs and like a child throwing a tantrum, he started kicking. 

“How old are you again?” Jake hissed, as Jay’s foot connected to his ribs. 

“Apparently five since he wants to act like a child,” Heeseung groaned trying to grab ahold of his leg. 

It took roughly ten minutes before Jay gave up the flight, letting his friends pick him up from the floor. 

It was a silly sight to see for sure. Sunghoon carrying your brother by his arms with Jake and Heeseung carrying his feet. If you didn’t know these boys at all, you’d assume they were fixing to use Jay as a jump rope.  

“Baby,” Jake called out to you, “Grab his shoes please,” 

Which you did, picking up your brother's favorite red and white Nike sneakers. 

It’s his birthday today. You and the three stooges planned a whole day's worth of activities for him. 

Heeseung and Jay went out to breakfast this morning. Sunghoon took him to see that new scary movie that just came out. Jake took him to buy new guitar strings and picks since the ones he had now were old and falling apart. 

You on the other hand weren’t sure what to do or get your brother, mostly since the stooges did everything you wanted to do for him. This was the first birthday in a long while that you were actually getting to spend with him. 

Usually, you’d just cash app him thirty bucks with a note saying “Happy birthday big brother ❤️ love you tons, get yourself something nice.” But obviously, since you’re living under his roof now, you couldn’t just give him money with a happy birthday note. 

But at the last minute, you knew exactly what to get him. You just need the stooges to get your brother out of the apartment and to the club for his official birthday celebration so you can sneak off to the mall. 

And obviously, your brother wasn’t having it. 

“I don’t want to go out!” Jay scoffed, trying to wiggle out of his friend's hold they have on him, “You guys already did enough for me today!” 

“Big brother,” you said, holding his shoes up. Jay stopped wiggling, his eyes shooting daggers at you, “Let's be grown up and put your shoes on. Okay?”

“Traitor!” he rolled his eyes, “My own sister! My flesh and blood!” 

Alright, now he’s just being dramatic. 

Jay honestly did want to go out tonight, but more of a go-out to buy alcohol and drink in the comfort of his apartment kinda go out. 

But the boys always went out for each other's birthdays, and today wasn’t any different. 

“Come on mate,” Jake laughed, “We always go out, we don’t have to be out long.” 

Jay knew it was a losing battle, plus he knew the four of them would just drag him out of the apartment looking how they are right now. So he gave him, “Fine!” he snapped, “But only for a couple hours.” 

Which everyone agreed on, setting him down and ushering him to the door, and handing him his shoes. 

You quickly left to pick up your brother’s birthday gift and then met them at the club. 

It was a brand-new club as well. Just opened earlier in the week. It was more for your college students anyway since it was right now the road from your campus. 

Something about it being a safer walk/drive to and from campus so the students living in the dorms would get back safer. Which honestly, good for the school to do that. 

Unfortunately, that didn’t go for you and your roommates. But oh well. 

You could tell the four boys had already been drinking by how dilated their eyes were, “You started without me?” 

Jay giggled, wrapping his arm around your neck, and bringing you close to him, “Isn’t my baby sister the cutest?” 

Oh god, they were further gone than you thought. 

“My man,” Jake giggled back, his eyes looking you up and down, “You’re telling me? I’ve crushed on her for years!” 

“She’s cute just like you my dude!” Heeseung smiled, slapping Jay’s back, “Never seen a more beautiful pair of siblings!” 

Sunghoon agreed, lifting his beer, “They are almost as cute as me and my sister. Maybe we four our ties.” 

“Okay,” you said, slipping out from your brother’s arm, “I have your birthday gift,” 

“For meeeeeeeee????” he sang, taking the bag from your hands, and slowly pulling out the tissue paper. 

Jay stood in silence, dropping the bag to the floor, holding the Chicago Bulls jersey you bought him in his hands, “Stinks,” he said, looking up at you, “How much was this?” 

You just smiled, taking the jersey from his hands, “Put it on!” 

Your brother has many jerseys, but they were all off-brand and not official, but this one was. He’s always wanted an official jersey since he was a kid, but never asked for one for holidays or his birthday, not wanting your parents to break their bank just to get him one. 

“YN,” he said, shaking his head, “This was way too much money!” 

“Shut up!” You pulled the fabric over his head, “Just accept the gift, you’ve gotten me plenty of things I have wanted for my birthday since we were kids. Please accept this.” 

Your brother nodded, pulling the fabric over his body, “Thank you, so much!” He pulled you into a tight hug, “I love you.” 

You hugged him back tighter, “I love you too!” 

He released you from the hug, patting the top of your head, “Okay, now that you’re here let’s get fucked up!” 

Jay cheered along with Sunghoon, creating a train back to the bar. 

“I thought we weren’t getting fucked up tonight!” You shouted, following after them. Jake and Heeseung rushing in front of you to join their friends on the train 

You all definitely spent more than a couple of hours there. The alcohol and music are flowing through your veins. 

Sunghoon at one point disappeared and returned with red lipstick covering his face. 

Heeseung stopped drinking and chugged down some water after realizing everyone was drinking a bit too much, encouraging you to also drink water to sober up since you still had to drive your car back home. 

“Seungieeeee,” you whined, “We can just get my car in the morning,” you leaned against his shoulder.

“Nah,” he said, lifting you up straight and handing you a bottle of water, “Drink. Jay would kill me if I let you continue to drink like this.” 

You pouted but took the water anyway. You knew he was right. Even drunk and on his birthday, Jay’s main focus is keeping you safe. Jay trusted his friends to help watch over you. 

You sat at the bar, chugging down your third bottle of water. Your vision was no longer blurry and the world didn’t feel like it was spinning anymore. You were sober enough now. 

You used the bathroom and made your way back out to the dance floor in search of your roommates, but your eyes landed on Shotaro and Sungchan. 

“Hey!” you shouted, walking up to them, “What are you guys doing here?” 

Taro smiled wide, “Checking out the club, what about you?” 

Shotaro figured you’d stay away from clubs, mostly after the last time you all went to one. 

“Same here! It’s Jay’s birthday, so we brought him out.” 

Taro nodded, “Where is he? I need to tell him happy birthday!” 

You giggled a little too much, maybe the alcohol was still in your system a lot more than you thought. 

You picked up a conversation with them, finally being able to officially meet Sungchan instead of just waving at each other in passing. 

Jake noticed the three of you. His body slowly stopped moving to the beat of the music. 

“Am I too drunk and seeing things, or is YN standing around with Osaki and his friend?” 

Heeseung leaned to Jake’s side, taking a look, “Nope I am seeing the same thing and I’m not even drunk.” 

“I told him to stay away from her,” Jake growled. 

Heeseung wrapped his arm around Jake, pulling him closer to him, “I think that problem is the least of your worries right now.” 

Jake rolled his eyes, trying to push his friend off him, “The fuck do you mean? I don’t like him around my girlfriend.” 

“Jaeyun shut up!” Heeseung snapped, making Jake go still, “Stella is here.” 

Yeah, that’s a bigger problem. 

Jake tried to hide himself between Jay, Sunghoon, and Heeseung. But unfortunately, Stella saw him anyway. 

“Jakey!” She sang, her friends following right behind her. 

Dear lord, give me the strength to not slap some hoes. 

“Stella,” he said blankly.

She pouted, “Are you not happy to see me?” 

“No,” Sunghoon answered for Jake, his thumb trying to wipe off the last bit of red lipstick from his jaw. 

“I wasn’t speaking to you, Park Sunghoon,” she laughed. 

“Well, the answer stays the same,” Jake finally answered, “Get lost.” 

She scoffed, “Why are you being an asshole?”

Sunghoon and Heeseung widened their eyes, taking that as a sign to walk away, pushing the drunk Jay further onto the dance floor. 

“Hmm, I dunno!” Jake snapped, “Maybe because you’re harassing my girlfriend?” 

She just chuckled, “Jake, we both know you don’t settle down.” 

Oh, now he was pissed. 

“Just because I didn’t give you the time of day besides when I wanted to get my dick wet doesn’t mean shit. We were never a thing.” 

She crossed her arms, also now pissed, “What makes her so special?” 

Jake laughed, “Because I’ve known her my whole life. She’s not fake and the realest person I know.” 

Jake’s eyes left Stella and looking back at you, seeing the way you laughed with Shotaro and Sungchan made his heart drop and fist clench. 

Stella turned and looked in the direction Jake was staring off at, “Damn, maybe she’s not as real as you may have thought.” 

Jake wanted to walk over there and snatch you away from Shotaro. 

But Stella had other plans, “Dance with me! Forget about her!” 

Jake shook his head, “Fuck off Stella. Stay away from me and YN.” 

But she was grabbing his wrist, and pulling him to the center of the dance floor. 

“Is everyone here too?” Shotaro asked, finally fully aware that Jake was more than likely shooting daggers at the back of his head. 

You nodded, looking in the direction you saw them last, “They are right…over there.” 

Taro looked, seeing Stella’s hand wrapped around Jake’s wrist, “YN, I’m—“

“Do you want to dance?” You quickly asked, taking his wrist between your fingers. 

“YN, I don’t think…” Shotaro didn’t want to play into whatever game you were about to play or get caught in the middle of whatever it was with you and Jake. He was already on Jake’s bad side. 

“Please,” you begged, the gloss in your eyes becoming more apparent. 

Oh fuck it I guess. 

Shotaro took your hand, leading you to the dance floor, leaving Sungchan alone. 

“Guess I’ll watch this unfold,” he said, tipping the beer glass to his lips. 

Shotaro obviously wasn’t thinking clearly. All he knew was you wanted to dance, so that’s exactly what he was going to do. 

He twirled you around in a circle, then pulled you to his chest, moving in rhythm to the beat of the music. 

He wasn’t dancing sexually with you, he would never cross that boundary or disrespect Jake and your relationship like that. But he did have his hands on your hips and held you close knowing damn well Jake was burning holes into him. 

Jake never sobered up so fast at seeing another man touching you. He pushed Stella’s hand off him, ready to walk over to you and push Shotaro away. But Stella worked way too fast. 

She pressed her back against his chest, rolling her body to the music, “Jake it’s just a dance, come on.” 

Jake placed his hands on her shoulders, ready to push her off him, his eye finding yours looking back at him. 

You narrowed your eyes in anger, seeing how pressed up to your boyfriend she was. Seeing his hands resting on her shoulders. 

Game on. 

You wrapped your arms around Taro’s neck, pushing your breasts against his chest. 

“YN,” Shotaro said quickly, feeling Jake’s eyes on the two of you. 

Your outfit and the way you were now pressing yourself against him made his cheeks flush. 

You had on a navy blue long-sleeve bodysuit that hung low enough for your breasts to poke out over the top and a black tight skirt that shaped your ass nicely, showing off your pretty long legs and your white sneakers. 

Jake wasn’t having it. Seeing the way you were slutting yourself over another man when he was standing right here? 

“Just dance,” you whispered into Taro’s ear, “Make him jealous with me, please.” 

Shotaro didn’t like this idea, but he also didn’t like the fact Jake had yet to remove himself from Stella. If this were such a problem on both ends, neither of them wouldn’t be acting as toxic as they are right now. So, he played along. Holding you tightly against him, his hands moving from your hips to the small of your back, dancing to the beat of the music against you. 

Jake clenched his jaw. Fine. Game on. 

Jake aggressively grasped Stella’s waist, grinding against her the same way she was against him. Leaning his head against the side of her, his eyes never leaving yours. “That’s it Jakey,” she said, reaching her arms up, ready to tangle her fingers in his hair. 

Jake quickly slapped her arms back down at her sides, “Don’t fucking touch me,” he whispered growling in her ears, “Only YN can touch me.” 

Stella scoffed, “That’s not stopping Osaki.” 

Jake knew the game you were playing. He’s known you his whole fucking life. Knew you inside and out. Knew this was just a fucking act to make him angry and jealous. And honestly? It worked. Jake continued to dance to the beat, the eye contact you both held together never wavering. 

You looked away only for a minute, to stand up on your tiptoes, pressing your breasts even more onto Taro’s chest, brushing your nose with his. Jake was done. Shoving Stella away from him, “What the fuck Jake?!” She snapped. 

“Stay the fuck away from me, Stella!” he growled, “I’m not playing your games anymore. Fuck off.” 

There he left her standing alone, completely defeated. 

“Get the fuck off her!” Jake growled once again, one arm wrapped around your waist and the other shoving Shotaro away. 

“Jake!” You snapped, shoving him off you. 

“Man, fuck this!” Taro yelled, “I told you to not fuck this up!” 

Jake got in his face, “Who are you to tell me what to do?!” 

“I told you so!!” Taro yelled again, “I prayed for you to not fuck this up. I told you what would happen if she came crying to me again!” 

Jake was beyond angry and starting to see red. 

You pushed yourself between them, sending them to take a couple of steps back. 

“Will you two fucking stop!” you snapped, looking over at Jake, “If you’re going to be pissed at anyone, direct it towards me!” 

So he did. 

“What the fuck were you thinking?!?” he snapped. 

“Me?!” you scoffed with a laugh, “What about you? I literally can’t leave you alone long enough without some bitch making passes at you or harassing me! Mostly Stella!” 

Jake chuckled, “Baby, you knew what you were signing up for when you fucked me in the hot tub that night.” 

You just looked up at him shaking your head, the tears forming in your eyes “No, because I thought you changed. Thought I was worth it enough for you to drop the playboy act, to give it all up. You don’t think I don’t see how you flirt with the girls when they talk to you? You may not touch them, but you still give them that flirty smile. You aren’t slick, Jake. You may have removed them all from your socials and blocked their numbers but I still see how you talk to them. As if I don’t even exist.” 

Your words hit Jake like a truck. He didn’t even realize that his actions could have been seen as flirting. He can swear up and down all day long that he wasn’t flirting. That it was just you being jealous. But before he could fight back, you spoke up again. 

“You probably haven’t even told any of them you had a girlfriend, did you? By the way Stella acted the one night, you never told anyone.” 

Jake relaxed his body, his clenched hands coming undone, “Had?” 

Shotaro laughed, “Damn, bro I didn’t even know she was taken when we first met.” 

Jake clenched his fists again, “No one is speaking to you!” 

Before more words could get thrown out, Sunghoon was quickly stepping beside you, wrapping his arm around yours and Jake’s neck. 

“Now, I don’t fucking know what is going on, but whatever it is can we just…not?” 

By Sunghoon’s tone of voice, you could tell he was pissed off. With the way he kept looking over his shoulder told you he was looking for Jay. 

But you weren’t in the mood to just drop everything. 

“Maybe control this pup and how he acts toward other females and then we wouldn’t have any issues.” 

Jake narrowed his eyes at you, “Really? YN? Gonna pull that bullshit when you were just slutting yourself all over Osaki?!” 

“Hey hey!” Sunghoon snapped, pointing his index finger into Jake’s chest, pushing you behind him, “Don’t you fucking talk to her like that! Jay would put you ten feet under if he heard that come out of your mouth.”

Sunghoon didn’t stop there, he turned back to you, his index finger now on your shoulder, “And you? It’s your brother’s birthday. Are we really going to do this right now!?” 

He was right, tonight was supposed to be about your brother, but it got turned into a massive fight between you and Jake. 

You shook your head, “Fine,” and with that you walked away, deciding being anywhere but here was better. 

“YN!” Jake called after you, starting to follow you. But Sunghoon stopped him, “YN!!” 

“Jake, let her go.” Sunghoon said, “She needs to cool off.” 

“YN!” he called after you again, his eyes not leaving you, even as his heart was breaking. 

You saw your brother, the biggest smile on his face as he walked over to you. 

“Hey!” he called for you, but you kept walking, moving right past him. 

Jay looked at you confused, then turned and faced Jake, his eyes moving between him, Sunghoon, and Shotaro, a sigh leaving his lips. 

—

Jake paced back and forth in the living room, his phone connected to his ear. 

“Your call has been forwarded to—“

“FUCK!” He yelled, dropping himself to the couch, fist clenching the back of his head, squeezing his phone. 

Sunghoon and Heeseung stood in the kitchen, watching their best friend’s heart break right in front of them. 

You didn’t come home last night and Jake was losing his mind. 

He was already running on no sleep. Stayed up the entire night waiting for you to come home. 

He’s called multiple times. Let plenty of voice messages. Texted probably over two hundred times. He even stalked your followers on Instagram to message Shotaro to see if he knew where you were. 

Sunghoon and Heeseung have tried calling and texting to, not getting any responses. 

Jay walked in from the front door, his phone attached to his ear. 

Jake stood up quickly, Sunghoon and Heeseung also stood up straighter. 

“Stinks, you can’t just up and leave like that.” He said, a bit too calm for everyone’s liking. Mostly to Jake. He expected Jay specifically to grill your ass hard for not returning back to the apartment. 

Jake quickly made his way to Jay, whispering to hand the phone to him. 

Jay shook his head, pointing his index finger behind Jake in a sign to back up. 

Which he did, taking a few steps back, and letting Jay fully walk into the living room. 

“Yeah but we were all worried about you,” Jay sighed, shaking his head, “Please just think clearly okay?” there was some silence, “Hey, I love you, okay? I always have your back.” more silence, then the phone call ended. 

“Is she okay?” Jake quickly asked, his hand shaking. 

“She’s fine, just give her space please.” 

Jake fell back onto the couch, covering his face with his hands, “I fucked up so hard.” 

“Yeah,” Jay said, his voice now turning dark, “You fucking did.”

“Can we please not fight right now?!” Heeseung snapped, “This bullshit is affecting us all, not just the two of you! YN is like a little sister to us too.” 

Jay sighed, “Just give her space, please. She’ll bounce back.” 

“Where is she?” Jake asked, “I won’t be able to sleep until I know where she is.” 

Jay scoffed, not wanting to tell him. He didn’t deserve to know where his sister was, “She’s safe and fine. Lose sleep over it. I don’t care.” 

With that Jay went to his room, slamming the door behind him. 

Sunghoon placed his hands on Jake’s shoulders, “She probably doesn’t want you to know,” Jake just shrugged, “Give Jay some time too. You know how he is over YN.” 

Jake just nodded, his vision going blurry from the tears swelling his eyes. 

You set your phone down on your bed, wiping the tears that streamed down your face. 

The smell of pasta made its way to your nose and your stomach growled. 

With a sigh you pushed yourself from your bed and out the room, making your way down the stairs. 

You stopped once you reached the bottom, eyes looking down the hallway at the door to the spare bedroom. 

“YN!” your mother called, pulling your attention back to the kitchen and the pasta. 

You walked in, eyes darting to every corner of the kitchen. Looking out the glass doors and seeing the hot tub. Everything in this house reminded you of him. It all started here. 

“Oh my sweet baby girl,” your mother sighed, pulling you into a hug, “Sweet heart tell me what happened.” 

You just shook your head, not wanting to tell her or even being ready to tell her. Part of this was your fault, and you didn’t want to ruin any image she had of Jake. That’s the last thing you wanted. 

You sat quietly during dinner, listening to your parents talk about work and their plans for the summer. Something about a trip and wanting you and Jay to tag along. 

“Yeah that sounds great Mom,” you said softly, taking a small bite of your food. 

After your parents finished their dinner, you sat in silence in the kitchen. Eyes not looking away from the hot tub. 

“Baby, you knew what you were signing up for when you fucked me in the hot tub that night.” 

His words burned into your brain. You thought he was the same kid you grew up with, but you were so so wrong. 

Your mind wandered back to every single memory that happened in this house. Starting from when you were kids and how he would tease you. How he would wave to you in the hallways during middle school. The small nods he’d give you as you passed him in the halls, the way he would tease and laugh at you with Jay. Then the memories from winter break. 

The way he wouldn’t take his eyes off you. How he was willing to risk his friendship with your brother just to be with you. How he felt with his body pressed against yours. How soft his lips were. How gently his hands would trade every inch of your skin. The stolen smiles when no one was looking. The quick kisses when everyone left the room for a second. The way he held you after the night he made love to you. 

It all started here. It all started here in this house. 

You finally picked yourself up from the table, quickly washed your plate, and dropped yourself onto the couch in the living room. 

You sat in silence for a while before your mother sat down beside you. 

“I just got off the phone with Jongseong…” 

You rolled your eyes, dropping your face into your hands, “What did he tell you?” 

“Nothing,” she said softly, pulling your hands from your face, “At least, no details. Just that there’s been some Issues between you and Jaeyun.” 

You just stared off into the distance, not knowing how to respond. 

“Sweetie, what happened?” 

You just shook your head, “I don’t want to talk about it right now.” 

She nodded, rubbing her thumbs over the top of your hands, “Honey, I know relationships are hard, but don’t ever forget who you are. Don’t get lost in the bad things. I don’t know for sure what happened between the two of you, I love you both dearly, but don’t forget what it is that you truly deserve. Don’t lose sight of that.” 

She kissed your forehead, then left you alone again in the living room. 

Eventually, you went back upstairs and fell down onto your bed. Jake even has his presence in this room. You wanted to grab your things and sleep downstairs on the couch or even take over your brother’s bedroom, but you weirdly felt comfort here in your room as well. 

You spent the next couple of days at home, giving yourself time to process everything. Taking that time to rethink everything from start to finish and eventually come to your final decision. 

You called Jay early this morning, double-checking with him that everyone would be gone from the apartment, he asked why multiple times, but you confirmed you’d tell him later. 

You made the hour trip back to the apartment, eyes darting in every direction to make sure no one’s cars were around, and made your way up the stairs and into the apartment. 

You pulled your duffle bags from the hall closet and quickly entered Jake’s bedroom. 

You filled both bags with everything you could, ultimately deciding to return back another day to get the rest. 

Taking one final look into the dresser drawers to make sure there was nothing else you needed, a voice startled you. 

“Where the fuck have you been?!” 

You jumped, turning to see Jake standing in the middle of the room. 

“You scared the fuck out of me!” you snapped at him, turning back around. 

“Answer me!” he snapped. 

You turned around to face him again, seeing he was clearly not in a good mood. 

“I am not speaking to you if you’re going to yell at me. We are adults, not children.” 

Jake looked down at your full duffle bags, “You’re leaving me?” 

You were hoping that if you did run into him, he’d be begging you to stay, promising to change, apologizing for how wrong he was, how wrong you both were but made up anyway. 

But his tone of voice made it obvious that wasn’t going to happen. 

As happy as Jake was finally getting to see you after the last couple of days, he was filled with anger. How could you just drop off the face of the earth for three days and not tell a damn soul? How could you come back finally just to pack your shit and leave him? Jake didn’t have a poker face and knew his anger was showing. 

You just scoffed, “Thought I made that obvious at the club.” 

Jake just rolls his eyes, “Why? We have one major fight and you’re ready to get up and leave?” 

You narrowed your eyes at him, “Jake why the fuck do you think? Your playboy life was clearly more important than me.”

Jake wanted to shout at you on how untrue that was, that you were the most important thing to him. 

“Jake, I gave you multiple chances to change, to stop the flirting. I can only take so much.” 

He scoffed, “Yeah? And what about Osaki?”

You groaned, crossing your arms, “Taro was my friend! If anything he helped me stop putting blinders on when it came to you!” 

“Oh, what the fuck ever YN!” 

Jake knew this fight was going to end badly. The minute he got Jay to crack about you being back at the apartment he rushed back so fast. Jake walked in scared you were leaving him. The last thing he wanted was a fight to happen. Yet, here you both were. 

“Why are you even here?!” You yelled back at him, “Don’t you have classes?!” 

“Why are you leaving me?!” Was all he could yell back. 

“Because Jake! This,” you pointed your index finger between the two of you, “Wasn’t supposed even to happen to begin with!” 

Jake clenched his fist, “What is that supposed to mean?” he softly asked. 

“Jake,” you sighed, “Maybe those silly rules my brother had in place were for a reason. Maybe he wasn’t crazy after all.” 

“Yeah?” he said, stepping closer to you, “Are you saying this was all a mistake?” 

You didn’t know what to say, you stood frozen as he walked closer to you. 

“Are you saying the night in the hot tub was for nothing? The way I’d fuck you so good every night in your bed even though I knew we could get caught you all regret?” 

He was inches away from your face, his hot breath touching your lips, “Was moving here a mistake too? Should we have been a good boy and girl and obeyed your brother's wishes?” 

You didn’t understand why, but the way he was deeply whispering these words to you made you wet and your knees buckle. 

“Take your fucking clothes off,” he whispered in your ear, his hands already working their way at the edges of your shirt and up your body. 

For reasons unknown, you let him undress you. You let his lips kiss yours aggressively. His hands removed your clothes with such force you were scared he’d rip your clothes into pieces. 

His tongue slid down your throat, twirling around your tongue as your hands worked their magic of removing his clothes. 

Jake pressed his bare body against yours, his hands aggressively moving over every inch of your body. His cock pressed up against you, his precum leaking down your belly. 

This make-out was different from your normal make-outs, it was filled with so much hate, anger, lust, and pain. 

His hands cupped your breasts, his palms making circles over your nipples and stopping every few seconds to squeeze the plush between his fingers. 

His right hand slid down your body, fingers spreading your folds and shoving three fingers into you. Aggressively finger fucking you and the lewd wet sounds from his fingers sliding in and out of you echoed in the room. 

“Jake,” you gripped his shoulders, squeezing down tightly at the pain between your legs, “Jake it hurts,”

“Take it,” he growled into your mouth, pressing his lips to yours hard, “Fucking take it.” 

You pulled his bottom lip between your teeth, biting down with such force as he tried to pull away, letting out the sexist groan you’ve ever heard leave his lips. Feeling the iron in your mouth from where your teeth broke the skin on his lip. 

“Fuck,” he groaned, picking you up by your thighs, and slamming you against the wall. 

His tip found your entrance and Jake wasted no time shoving himself in. 

You released the most wet, dirty, pornographic moan in his ear, his cock twitching deeply inside you, chills being sent down his back from how sexy that moan was.  

Jake pounded into you with such force and so rough that his necklace bounced against your collarbone, more than likely leaving bruises against your skin. 

“This was such a mistake huh?” he moaned, “Such a fucking mistake? Still, you need my cock like the good fucking slut you are.” 

You clenched your jaw, your hands flying to the back of his head and taking a handful of his hair, pulling it hard. 

“God fucking damnit,” he moaned again, pumping faster into you and getting rougher that his legs started to get weak. 

“I hate you,” you whined, the tears starting to gloss over your eyes, “I fucking hate you!” 

Jake bit your ear lobe, sucking on the skin before releasing it and pressing his lips to your ear, “Yeah? You hate me? Prove it then.” 

You wiggled out of his grip on you and the wall, aggressively pushing him across the room and down onto the bed. 

Jake was so turned on by this, by this hate sex. The way your eyes were glossed over with so much hatred for him at this moment. The way you threw him onto the bed and straddled him made him crazy. You were so sexy when being dominant. 

You wasted no time sliding back down his cock, using his shoulders to your advantage of riding the fuck out of him. 

You bounced on his dick with the same aggression he used when fucking you against the wall. Your nails are digging into his skin, drawing a bit of blood. 

Jake kept eye contact with you, his hands gripping your ass tightly and helping you slide up and down his shaft. 

Your vision was becoming blurry by how glossed over your eyes were becoming. You truly hated him at this moment. 

Hated him for what he’s put you through since moving here. Hated him for his behavior at the club. Hated him for his past. Hated him for fucking you in the hot tub that night. Hated him for making you love him even after everything. Hated him because you knew you’d never stop loving him. 

And the only way to get out of all this madness was fuck him like there was so tomorrow. Fuck him until his head spun and he was seeing stars. 

“Fuck, oh fuck,” he breathed out, feeling his climax approaching fast, fingers gripped even tighter against your ass “That’s it baby, f-fuck, hate fuck me. Make me cum and make a mess of your cunt.” 

You grinded on him harder until his head was flung back and his cum filled you to the brim. Your orgasm hit a second later, mixing your cum together as you slowed your pace until your legs could no longer move you. 

Jake fell back onto the bed, pulling you down with him, wrapping his arms tightly around you. 

You both breathed deeply together until your breaths slowed, and your hearts calmed down. 

Jake rubbed his thumbs against your back, “Please don’t leave me.” 

You pulled yourself off of him, sitting on the edge of the bed as you pulled your clothes back on. 

Jake sat up on his elbow, eyes pleading with you to not leave. 

“Please, YN, I can’t lose you.”

You looked away from him, hands reaching up and unclasping his necklace, setting it down on the bed, “You already did.” 

Without another word, you grabbed your bags and quickly left the apartment. 

Jake slapped his hands onto his face, rolling over and screaming as loud as he could into his bedsheets. 

—

Jake sat in the living room, his hand gripping the necklace as his eyes stared a hole into the wall. 

Jay was the first to find him like this. His face is all puffy from hours of crying. Jake looked like he was barely able to dress himself. His shirt was inside out, and his sweatpants looked like they were pulled from his dirty clothes bin. 

“Shit man,” Jay said, running over quickly to his best friend, kneeling down in front of him, “What happened? Speak to me.” 

Jake couldn’t even look at Jay, the two of you looked way too much alike and it took losing you to really see you in him. 

“She’s gone, she left me.” 

Jay closed his eyes tightly, releasing a deep sigh. 

“Jay, I can’t live without her.” 

Then the tears came back and all Jay could do was wrap his arms around Jake, holding him close as he screamed into his shoulder. 

Jake screamed until his voice gave out and fell asleep on the couch, completely wearing himself out. 

Jay, Sunghoon, and Heeseung stood in the kitchen at the counter, arms crossed and looks of sadness on each of their faces. 

“What are we going to do with him?” Heeseung whispered, finally breaking the silence, “I’ve never seen him like this before.” 

“Is there anything we can do?” Sunghoon asked, “Where is YN even going?” 

Jay just shrugged, “When I called her after he fell asleep, she said she was moving into a dorm room on campus. That she’ll stay until the semester is over and will transfer back to the college she came from during the summer.” 

Both Sunghoon and Heeseung sighed, looking down to the floor. They didn’t want you to leave just as much as Jake and Jay. You were family to them after all. 

“Maybe this is for the best,” Sunghoon spoke up again after a while, “You two didn’t see how bad it was that night,” he shook his head, “I was scared if I didn’t step in, it would have gotten so much worse.” 

Jay dropped his face into his palm, trying to think of any way possible to fix this situation. To play any type of damage control he can to bring you back and fix your relationship with Jake. But Sunghoon was right, Jay didn’t witness what happened that night. He had no clue how bad it really was. 

“Let’s just…” Jay sighed again, “Give them time. My sister is way too stubborn, she just needs her space and time to heal. Jake? I dunno, we’ll figure something out.” 

They all agreed knowing it was the only thing they could do anyway. 

—

You sighed, holding your thumb up and squinting your eye, tilting your head off to the side. 

“It’s crooked, YN. Doing this whole painter's thing ain’t going to work.” 

You rolled your eyes and dropped your hand to your side, giving Taro your nastiest side eye, “Well I don’t see you helping, now do I?” 

Shotaro smirked, “Why are you even trying to hang up this dollar store painting when you’re leaving in less than a month?” 

You’ve already lived in the dorms for three weeks now and plan to just repack everything up the moment the semester ends at the beginning of June and stay with your parents over the summer while you get your transfer papers and credits to return back to your previous college. 

So yeah, Shotaro had a point on why you even bothered hanging up a printed copy of Starry Night that you found in a bin at the dollar store. 

“Listen,” you said, hands up in defense, “This room is plain. It needs more color!” 

Shotaro shrugged in a way that he sees your point, you might only have a couple more weeks left here, but might as well do it comfortably. 

“Honestly,” he said tilting his head, “it looks kinda cool sideways a bit.” 

You followed your best friend's motions, “Yeah, so maybe I was onto something.” 

You both chuckled, feeling so at ease. 

“Hey…how are you doing? Really?” 

There goes that easiness. 

“Taro…”

“Please just…be honest with me,” he pleads with you, “I didn’t force you to tell me everything when you showed up to my dorm room that night, and I’ve given you that space. I just want to make sure you’re okay.” 

You couldn’t be upset with him for wanting to make sure you’re fine. You didn’t tell him everything that happened between you and Jake, you just kind of showed up at his dorm room crying and only telling him that you two were over. Shotaro was patient with you as you cried your heart out, giving you all the time to calm down and breathe. 

After that night you never spoke about Jake again. Not even so much saying his name. You even told your brother to not mention him to you. The pain was still fresh and it hurt way too much. You didn’t want to deal with it. 

What made the breakup easier was not seeing him on campus. Neither of you had classes together and the only time you actually saw him on campus was during bio and it was when he’d be leaving his class and see him out the window. But even then you moved seats away from the window, Shotaro moving with you. 

“I am fine,” you half lied because it was half-truth. You felt okay for the most part. Yeah the pain is still there and you miss Jake dearly, but you felt stress-free, no worries. 

“YN…” he whispered your name, pulling you into a hug, “I can see it in your eyes, I know you’re not completely fine.”

You couldn’t hold it in anymore, finally crying again since the night of the breakup. 

“I miss him so fucking much,” you cried into his shoulder, “I hate how empty I feel without him. I hate how at ease I feel without him. I hate that I miss him. I hate that I am even crying over him.” 

Shotaro rested his chin on the top of your head, slowly rocking you back and forth. He could only imagine how you were feeling. You’ve known Jake your entire life. He was always a presence in your life. And falling in love with him made that complicated, but Shotaro could tell it was always worth it. Regardless of what you say about it. 

All Shotaro wanted to do was fix it. To take that pain away. To also tell you ‘I told you so’. To hug you tightly until you forget all your worries. He wanted to kiss you but at the same time, he didn’t. So many conflicting feelings. 

Shotaro didn’t know what to feel when it came to you. All he knew was he cared about you and wanted you happy. Even if that meant being with Jake. 

Your crying slowed, small hiccups leaving your lips. 

Shotaro became brave and connected his lips to your forehead, lingering his lips a couple of seconds longer before releasing you completely from his arms. 

“I think before you ultimately decide to move away, you should think about what you’d be leaving behind.” 

Taro’s hands slid down your arms before he let go, walking out of your dorm, and leaving you alone. 

You knew going back to your previous college meant being alone. 

No parents just an hour away. 

No Shotaro. 

No Sunghoon. 

No Heeseung. 

No older brother. 

No Jake.

Your eyes wandered back up to your poster, fingers on instinct going to your neck, only to find the disappointment of his necklace no longer there. 

—

“Jake!” Jay yelled, his hands gripping the locked door, his forehead resting against the wood, “Sim Jake! Sim Jaeyun!” 

Jake groaned, pulling his blankets over his head, “Go the FUCK away!” 

Jay clenched his teeth, “You need to talk to your brother and parents!! They haven’t stopped ringing my line all because you don’t know how you answer your damn fucking phone!!” 

Jake shook his head as if anyone could see it. 

It’s been a month since you left him, and you leave for your parents tomorrow morning. You’ll be gone forever. 

Jay’s knocking got more annoying, his hand twisting the door handle to the point where Jake felt like jumping out the window. 

But he chose to climb out of bed and unlock the door instead. 

Jay busted the door open, his face flushed with anger, “What the fuck man?!” 

Jake laid back down on his bed, facing away from his friend. 

Jay knew Jake was still going through it. He’s never seen his best friend so depressed, so not himself. 

Jake has never skipped class back to back or as often as he has recently. 

Jake never skipped meals. But now he barely eats. 

Jake only got up to go to work and then got right back into bed right after. 

He was so lifeless and it was driving Jay and the others crazy. They all hated seeing him like this. All over some girl. 

Well, not just some girl, his little sister. But the point still stands. 

But seeing Jake like this only made Jay really and truly realize how much you meant to him. That the night back at your parents after you both got caught wasn’t just some bullshit. It was all real. Jake loved you deeply and wholeheartedly. He truly couldn’t live without you. 

Jay understood how Jake could be feeling right now, you leave campus tomorrow and vowed to never come back here. Forced Jay to promise never to bring Jake to another family function or vacation. To keep him away. 

No wonder Jake felt like the world was ending. 

“Jake…” Jay softly whispered, “Speak to me, man.” 

“Bring her back,” he mumbled. 

“Hmm?” 

“Bring her back to me,” Jake spoke up, “use your brother's convincing skills and bring her back to me.” 

Oh how badly Jay wished he could. 

The apartment isn’t as full of life as it used to be with your presence here. 

“I miss her too man,” was all Jay could say, slowly closing the door, “I wish I could do more.” then closed the door, leaving Jake alone in his dark room. 

He didn’t know how many hours had passed since Jay left, all Jake knew was the sun had been replaced by the moon, He slowly drifted off into sleep, just to wake up to his alarm and the sun peeking through his curtains. 

Jake’s eyes fluttered open, his ears drowning out the alarm as he focused on the summer sun rising. 

You were gone. And you took his heart with you. 

Someone came in and eventually turned Jake’s alarm off, he doesn’t know who, he just knows someone came in giving him a sigh and turning the loud thing off(it was Sunghoon). 

More time passed, Jake didn’t know how long, but the next sound he heard was someone practically breaking his door down. 

“Get the fuck up,” it was Jay, “Come on, get your ass up!” 

Jay gripped the bedsheets and pulled them from Jake’s body. 

Jake rolled onto his back with a groan, “Can’t you let me sit in my depression peacefully?!!” 

“Fuck no,” Jay quickly said, walking to the closet and pulling out clean clothes, “Go shower, you smell gross.” 

Jake sat up, staring at his friend with confusion, “I don’t want to go anywhere.”

“Yes you do, and you will. Get. Up.” 

Jake fell back down onto his bed, “No.” 

Jay lost his patience, dropping Jake’s clothes to the floor and stomping to his bed, grabbing both his arms and pulling him off his bed. 

“What the fuck!” Jake yelled, “Fuck off! I swear to god I’ll beat your fucking ass.” 

“Stop being a bitch, go shower and get ready! You’re going to win back my sister.” 

Jake’s body went limp, “What?” 

“She’s not staying with our parents for the summer anymore. Shotaro just texted me saying she decided to go back as soon as possible, she’s just waiting for the school to accept her transfer, which is only a matter of days.” 

Jake just shook his head, “She doesn’t want me.” 

Jay dropped his body to the floor, “She loves you, man! Why the fuck else do you think she’s wanting to leave so quickly?” 

Jake looked up at his friend, knowing he was right. You don’t do things just for nothing. 

“Please go after her,” Jay softly said, “I can’t have my family broken up like this.” 

Jake slowly stood up, “Is she at the house?” 

Jay nodded, “I called her right after Shotaro texted me.” 

Jake moved fast. Taking the quickest shower he’s ever done. Brushed his teeth, fixed his hair, and threw on the clothes Jay pulled from his closet. 

It meant a lot to Jake that Jay finally and fully accepted your and Jake’s relationship. It gave him the motivation he needed. 

Jake picked up his necklace from his dresser and placed it around his neck. It is the first time it’s touched his skin since he gave it to you. 

With his keys in his hands, he was out the door and in his car, making his way to you. 

The house was quiet. Your parents were at some beginning of summer party with your father's coworkers. 

The only sound was the air conditioner turning on and off and the wind chimes that hung on the back porch blowing in the summer wind. 

You shifted positions on the couch more times than you could count. 

The silence was driving you crazy. You were praying for your parents to be home when you got here. You couldn’t even nap if you wanted to. You weren’t tired. 

You got up from the couch and aimlessly walked around. Opening closet doors, going through the movie rack in the living room, and even rearranging your mother's books on her bookshelf that sat in the corner of the living room. 

You looked in the laundry room, seeing visions of you and Jake doing your laundry together. Then found yourself looking into the guest bedroom, the visions of your brother, Sunghoon, Heeseung, and Jake as children playing in this room, then the vision faded, replacing the three stooges all grown up and sleeping peacefully, you crawling into bed with Jake to wake him up for breakfast being ready before it was time to leave to go back to each other colleges. 

You were now upstairs, staring into your bedroom, remembering every night Jake would sneak in here. 

You found yourself outside on the back porch, staring down at the hot tub the five of you built together. 

Without thinking, you pulled the cover off the tub and turned it on, watching the bubbles form. 

It may be summer now, but late spring air still hangs around, the weather still being perfect to sit in the hot tub. 

You pulled your tank top over your head and stepped out of your shorts, leaving you in just your bra and panties.

Jake parked his car at the curb, never being so thankful for his feet to touch solid ground in his life as his legs rushed him to the front door. 

 He gripped the door handle, twisting it to find it locked. 

“YN!!” he shouted, knocking loudly but receiving no answer. 

Jake felt his hands sweating, eyes darting around the front porch trying to remember where your parents hid the spare key to the front door, ultimately finding it in the pot with the fake rose bush. 

He unlocked the door, quickly rushing in and slamming the door behind him, “YN!!” 

Still no answer. 

Jake got nervous. Your parents' cars weren’t in the driveway but yours was. But you weren’t answering and that’s what made him shake. 

“YN!” he called for you again, stomping his feet up the stairs, seeing your bedroom empty except for your duffle bags all over the floor. 

He ran back downstairs, checking the guest room, then finally stepped into the kitchen, seeing you sitting in the hot tub. 

Jake quickly pushed the glass door open, “YN,” 

You jumped at the sound of his voice, quickly turning around, your heart fluttering at seeing his voice. 

“Jake?? What are you doing here?!” 

You stepped out of the hot tub, meeting him halfway. His hands not missing a beat in pulling you towards him and embracing you, the water from your body soaking his shirt. 

“Don’t go,” he whined, the tears starting to form in his eyes, “Don’t make that choice.” 

As much as you loved being in his arms again, you softly pushed away from him, taking a few steps back. 

“Jake, the choice has already been made.” 

“Then unmake it!” he begged, “Come back to the apartment with me! Everyone misses you, I miss you!”

You looked away from him and down at the porch, your clothes being seen from your peripherals, reminding you of the thin pink laced bra that didn’t cover up much, and pink panties were all that you were wearing. 

You covered yourself with your arms, giving Jake the ‘turn around’ look. 

Jake didn’t even realize you were basically naked, all he cared about was wanting to see you again. He couldn’t help but laugh. 

“This isn’t funny asshole!” you snapped. 

“YN, I’ve seen you naked and bent over in multiple different positions more times than I can count on my hands and feet, you don’t have to cover yourself up like a shy high school girl.” 

You knew he was right, and his continued laugh only made a small laugh leave your lips as well. 

You relaxed your body again and locked eyes with him, “Why did you come here, Jake?” 

“Because I know I fucked up. Because I know I didn’t take care of my past the way I should have. I said such hurtful things to you. I did such hurtful things. I let my jealousy over Osaki blind me, I let Stella treat you the way she did and if I knew sooner what she was doing towards you I would have stopped it sooner.” 

He was being so honest and sincere, you could see it written all over his face, “Jake…” 

“Baby please,” he pleaded, his eyes glossing over once again, “I can’t do life without you. I love you for fuck sales and I’ll be damned if I just let you up and walk away from me again. I need you. And if you give me one final chance to make it right, I’ll treat you so good I swear it. Things will go back to how they were but be even better.” 

Your legs moved on their own and stopped right in front of him. Your hand cupped his face, thumb wiping the tear that fell, “I don’t want to hurt anymore,” you whispered. 

“Baby girl I won’t ever hurt you again, your brother would murder me if I did.” he laughed, relaxing his face into your touch, “I love you. Please come back home.” 

You felt your own tears falling down your face, his hands reaching up and wiping them away, “I love you so much,” you cried, “I was so lost without you.” 

“I know baby,” he whispered, pulling your head to his chest, “I was barely alive without you.” 

Jay paced back and forth in the living room, biting his nails in a nervous habit. 

“You’re creating a draft,” Sunghoon groaned, “Sit the fuck down, will you? You’re making me nervous.” 

“Neither one of them is answering their phones,” your brother said with a worried tone, “What if she killed him?” 

Heeseung rolled his eyes, “If anyone has the right to murder him it’s you, not sit down.” 

Jay just nodded, his ass hovering over the recliner chair barely sitting down when the front door opened, causing everyone to stand to their feet. 

Jake walked into the apartment, his eyes looking over his three friends. 

Jay’s body deflated, his heart stopping at not seeing you by Jake’s side. It didn’t work. 

“Goddamn,” you said, dropping your bags onto the floor, your finger sliding across the front table where everyone keeps their car keys, “I leave for a little over a month and you guys can’t even dust?” 

The three boys stood in silence at your presence, their eyes seeing the silver double-linked chain necklace resting against your collarbones. 

You raised a brow at them, “What? Can’t answer for not keeping this place clean?!” 

With no words being said, Jay was now in front of you, his arms wrapping around you in a tight hug. Sunghoon and Heeseung appear at your sides, joining the hug and pulling Jake in too. 

“Don’t ever fucking leave us again,” your brother said, obviously forcing himself to hold back from crying. 

“I miss you guys too,” you whispered, nuzzling your head in your brother’s neck as he squeezed you tighter. 

Jay cooked a massive dinner that night. Jake finally fills himself up from the meals he’s missed. 

The apartment was finally back at its normal level of loudness and full of life. 

Music blasted through the portable speakers in the living room, everyone dancing and drinking. Finally, just have a party in the comfort of their home. 

Jake pulled you into him, placing soft kisses on your lips, the corners of his lips curling into a smile. 

“You’re mine forever, understand?” he whispered in between kisses. 

“Forever.” you agreed. 

You spent the rest of the night with your boys dancing and drinking until you each fell asleep on the living room floor. 

This was your family. And you were finally back home.

#jake bby #sim jaeyun #sim jake #reader x sim jake #sim jake x reader #jake x reader #enhypen #enhypen x reader #reader x enhypen #enhypen fanfic #enhypen fanfiction #enhypen scenarios #enhypen imagines #enhypen smut #sim jake smut #established relationship #yeonzzzn writing #off limits trilogy

[gay-dorito-dust]

Would you be willing to write a Miguel x Spider!Reader oneshot where they’re arguing over something the reader did on a mission. And in the heat of an argument, Miguel yells “Because I love you!” at the perfectly wrong time, revealing why he cares about the reader’s safety.

‘What the hell was that back there. You could’ve jeopardised the whole mission with that reckless stunt you pulled back there!’ Miguel barked, ripping off mask the first moment moment he could; Hellfire were setting ablaze to his beautiful scarlet eyes that were zeroed in on you as the anger, the frustration upon his face became prominent the more he closed the distance between you.

‘When will you let this go, Miguel. When we became Spider-Man we knew the risks that we were running with-‘ ‘so you thought it’d be better to take a running head start by taking the leap and then diving headfirst into them?!’ Miguel cuts you off and with an indignant huff he adds, ‘you don’t get extra points for being reckless, this isn’t some little game that you can just come back to when you feel like it. No, what we do is a full time commitment with no room for last minute deviations just because you were feeling more heroic.’

You grit your teeth. You respected Miguel, you truly did and at one point in time you wanted to do right by his little rule book of how to be a great hero. However you soon learned that it’s better to play by your own rules rather then it was to play by those made by others and slowly but surly found a method that worked for you. For no two methods were the same when it came to protecting and saving people but if they both end in the same conclusion, then no one should be able to raise an issue with it. At the end of the day you and Miguel saved people from a much bigger problem if left unchecked; so why was it that all of a sudden he had an issue with your methods?

It never upset him this much before, so why now. Did he think you as incapable? As unreliable? As untrustworthy to fully let you handle a situation on your own? Whatever it was it only proved in pissing you off despite your semi-injured state; you didn’t care that you’ve gotten hurt, you’ve gotten hurt plenty of times before and he never once batted an eye or exemplified his emotions as he did as of right now. You could barely get a read on the guy as he stood mere feet away, chest heaving even though he wasn’t out of breath, eyes wide and his hair slightly disheveled from the way he had torn off his mask earlier.

And yet you couldn’t help but find him beautiful in his anger, for it was like witnessing the makings of a Greek tragedy; beautifully written, yet so heartbreakingly tragic.

‘Why does it matter?’ You spat, getting up, despite your injured leg’s desire to buckle beneath the weight of not only you but the situation at hand. You saw the briefest movements of Miguel’s arms almost stretch out to instinctively catch you but stopping midway through the motion before going slack at his sides once more; as though remembering why he was mad at you in the first place. ‘It never mattered before, so why does it matter now? You don’t hound the others for doing it so why is it me that’s getting shit on for doing the same when I ain’t the first to do so!’

‘Because I love you!’ Miguel exclaimed.

The silence afterwards was almost deafening. Miguel’s outburst quieted you quickly as a thousand and one thoughts raced in your head; how long? why now? Was this merely a ruse to silence you so he could badger on at you for your supposed mistake? You didn’t know what to make of anything anymore now that he said that. You didn’t want to believe it for starters on the basis that not once had he ever shown interest in you, if anything he made it apparent to push you away or avoid you entirely from any and all interaction, and even when he did it was comprised of short responses that left the attempts at conversation to die as an overwhelming awkwardness forced you into leaving him be.

‘What?’

‘I love you.’ Miguel repeated, softer this time.

‘I get that but why-‘ ‘haven’t I shown it until now? As stupid as it sounds but I didn’t want you to get hurt because of me and look where you are,’ he gestured to your injured state, ‘hurt because of me.’ He adds defeatedly. You were about to open your mouth when Miguel raised a hand, indicating that he wasn’t finished, ‘I know I haven’t given you any reason to believe me when I say that I love you. I avoid you like the plague and I push you away whenever I see you starting to get too close and respond in a clipped tone of voice so that you’d loose interest and move on to talk to someone else.’

He stopped talking to move in closer to you, grasping you by arms with a firm grip as all the anger in his face seemingly having been melted away. The raging hellfire that once consumed his scarlet eyes in their entirety had been diminished to that of dying ambers, unveiling his admiration, his worry, his guilt and most importantly, his love; the sneer now long gone was replaced by a softer more tender expression that didn’t hide away the worry lines that were deeply etched into his skin. ‘I don’t deserve you, I’m not worth having you because sooner or later you’ll see me the way I’ve always seen myself and I’d rather you be as far away as possible when that happens.’ Miguel said, making sure he was maintaining eye contact with you the entire time to prove that he was being wholeheartedly genuine, not wanting to lie to you about something as personal as his feelings; He’s done that for long enough, Miguel knew his breaking point was upon the incline and seeing you act the way you did during the mission only fast forward it.

‘Yet for some inexplicable reason I can’t stop myself for wanting to protect you, to make sure you’re safe, to make sure that you never come to harm. At first I thought it was because I was looking out for a teammate, making sure you didn’t slip up and cause more potential problems for the rest of us, making sure that you didn’t let a single perpetrator slip but soon I learnt it was far more then just simply looking after a teammate...’ Miguel paused to blink away the images regarding of the nightmares he’d get concerning you, which were few and far between but those times were enough to suffocate him with fear. ‘It was something more and I grew scared, I grew scared because I know what it’s like to loose it all but for some reason I also knew that loosing you would just be the nail in the coffin for me.’

Miguel admits as he presses his forehead against your own, his hands trailing from up your arms until they’re caressing the skin of either side of your neck between calloused thumbs. He closing his eyes and allows himself to breath you in, reminding himself that you were here and that he managed to get to you before anything else could, that he kept you safe, not from all harm but at least from some of it and that was good enough but he knew deep down that he needed the do better. ‘Don’t make me imagine a life without you,’ he whispers, pressing his forehead against yours just that tiny bit harder as his fingertips found their home where your pulse points were to remind him that you weren’t gone completely from his grasp, ‘for I don’t think I’m strong enough to withstand that reality.’

‘You don’t have to.’ You told him softly, lifting your hands to caresses the skin of his cheeks and feeling him effectively melt within your hold. ‘Not anymore.’

#spiderman atsv x you #spiderman atsv imagine #spiderman atsv #spiderman atsv fic #spiderman atsv imagines #spiderman across the spiderverse #spiderman atsv x reader #miguel o’hara imagine #miguel o’hara #miguel x reader #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel o’hara imagines #Miguel o’hard fic #spiderman 2099 x reader #spiderverse x reader

[thetriumphantpanda]

Take My Breath Away | Joel Miller

The Checklist - Breath Play

Chapter Summary | It's the overthinking that makes it hard to ask for what you want sometimes, so you ask for the thing you want most in the only way you know how - in the heat of the moment.

Chapter Warnings | Again, and as always, porn without plot. Dirty talk, fingering, unprotected PiV sex, creampie, breath play (sexual choking), peeing after sex (pls do this), softness and lots of love. No outbreak AU. No use of y/n.

Word Count | 2k

Pairing | Joel Miller x F!Reader

Authors Note | Oh my god what is this? Charlie finishing another series? I cannot tell you how sad I am to be saying goodbye to these two - they have turned into the two greatest loves of my life. Thanks are due to @vickywallace for sending this idea into my inbox in the first place - thank you for such a wonderful idea and for supporting this series! If you like this then please considering reblogging or commenting, it makes my life worth living! And if you'd like to support me further you can donate to my Ko-Fi.

A reminder that whilst this is part of a wider series, this can be read as a standalone if you wish.

Beautiful divider by @saradika

I no longer have a taglist, to keep up to date with my work, please follow @thetriumphantpandanotifs and turn on notifications.

Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist | Ko-Fi.

It started innocently enough. Joel’s big palm resting at your collarbone when he was inside you, his teeth nipping at your earlobe. It was a fleeting moment, no added pressure, but there was still a shot of thrill that settled across you, one that made you think of that little list and the thought in the back of your mind that you wanted him to push his hand a little higher and press.

How to ask for it properly had been playing on your mind for a little while. It’s not like the two of you weren’t open with each other, you’d proved that already. And you trusted Joel with your life, you know he wouldn’t hurt you. But each night, when you sit together on the couch and go to open your mouth to talk about it, nothing happens. Mainly because it feels inconsequential to you, does it need a big conversation like some of the other things? You don’t think so.

It happens about a week later. Friday night, dinner eaten, glass of whisky drunk in front of the TV. Joel is settled on his back, glasses perched on the end of his nose as he reads a book, you’re similar, but you’re restless. You’re reading some romance novel, and like clockwork, the two love interests have just turned up to the hotel to find there’s only one bed. They don’t really hate each other anymore, and in his sleep, he’s rolled over and draped an arm over her waist, chest to her back, and she can feel how much he wants her.

You scoff a little, which pulls Joel’s attention from his own reading, to you, “That bad huh?” He asks, innocently enough.

“Just predictable.” You shrug, trying to hide the way your thighs are unconsciously rubbing together under the sheets.

“Lemme guess,” He says, setting down his own book, along with his glasses, “They hate each other, but also secretly they don’t, and they’ve just turned up to the hotel and they have to share a bed?”

You turn to him, chuckling as you look at the front and back cover, “Have you read this before?”

“No baby,” He chuckles, “It’s just they’re all the same, if it ain’t that then it’s somethin’ forbidden or she’s too happy and he’s too grumpy, just a lucky first guess.”

There’s a little more talking, and then the lights turn off, Joel turning on his side to fall asleep, but there’s that deep throb between your thighs that no matter what you do, won’t go away.

“Joel?” You whisper, poking at his arm, listen to him grumble but ultimately not reply, “Joel?” You whisper again, a little louder.

“Yes, baby?” It’s soft when he talks, not annoyed at you for keeping him awake.

“Joel, I need you.” You whisper once more.

You can hear the rustle of the sheets as he turns, then his arm wrapping around your waist, tugging you into his chest, that hand of his wandering down to cup your ass, “You feelin’ needy, baby?” He asks lowly, pressing kisses to your forehead and then your cheek until he’s kissing your mouth.

You roll onto your back, gripping onto his naked shoulders so he follows, the entire weight of his body on yours until he rests his upper body on his elbows, hands pushing your hair back from your face as he settles himself between your thighs. You can feel him, pressing against that part of you, already semi-hard and wanting, like he was struggling just as much as you to go to bed without touching you.

“You needy for me too?” You ask innocently as his lips press to your neck, he doesn’t answer, just slowly rolls his hips into yours.

There’s a moment where he reaches down between the two of you, lets his fingers brush over your folds, dipping down slightly to find you already wet. It’s not a surprise for either of you anymore, you think that there’s always some level of slickness settling between your legs whenever you see him - still not quite believing you get him all to yourself.

Joel drags his fingers up to your clit, slick dragging across your bud of nerves, a soft whimper leaving your mouth as he gently circles it. He’s taking his time, working you up slowly because he knows you don’t have anywhere to be in the morning. In a few minutes, you’re already moving your hips in time with his fingers, his mouth kissing your neck, his teeth nipping at your skin too. You’re clutching at his shoulders, nails digging half-moon shapes into his skin, when he pulls his hand away.

You’d complain until you can feel what he’s doing - his fist tight around his cock, moving up and down as he positions himself at the entrance of your cunt, tip nudging there as his mouth comes to cover your own. You’re just opening your mouth to him when he slips himself inside, slowly edging further and further inside you until he’s sheathed in your tight heat and you’re moaning into his open mouth.

He’s slow with it at first, a gentle drag of his cock in and out of you, like he’s got all the time in the world. Every time he presses into you, he moans into your mouth a little, sighs when he drags back out and it’s perfect, but you know you need more. You reach out, circle his big wrist with your hand.

“Will you…” You trail off a little, “Will you do something for me?”

He stills inside you, tip of his cock pressed so deep you could cry, “Anything for you, honey.”

“Will you put your hand on my neck?” Your voice is timid, and you’re glad you’ve kept the lights off.

There’s enough moonlight drifting in through the blinds that don’t close properly that you can still see him, but he’s shrouded in shadows too. He’s careful when he moves, pushing himself up to rest on one palm that’s pressed net to your head, the other hand being dragged exactly where you want it. He lets you rest it where you’re comfortable, just at the base, right above your collarbone.

“You tap my arm three times if you want me to stop, okay?” He asks, finally dragging his cock back out of you.

He puts a little pressure on with his hand when he thrusts back into you. The pressure is nice, but there’s something about it that doesn’t feel right, so you do exactly as he says, tap his arm three times. Joel is quick to take his hand off you, but you grab it quickly enough that he doesn’t have chance to rest it back on the bed.

“Try it a little higher.” You suggest, pulling it back so that the pad of his thumb and middle finger are pressed into the skin just under your ear.

“Like this?” He asks quietly as he repeats his movements from before, adding a tiny bit of pressure to your neck as he pushes back into your slick cunt, and yes, you think, exactly like that.

Joel keeps his hand pressed there for a few of his movements before he lightens the pressure on your throat, letting you catch your breath but keeping that wide palm resting right where you asked for it to be.

It’s a sensation you never thought you’d enjoy so much, but every time Joel’s palm tightens around your throat, there’s a rush to your brain and a throb between your legs. It’s exhilarating and there’s something about the way you trust him, literally with your life right now, to know exactly what you want and how to give it to you.

“You like that, don’t ya?” Joel rasps out above you, hips snapping into yours.

He releases the pressure from your neck again, just enough for you to be able to nod your head and bite at your lip to try and stop yourself from grinning. Joel brings the hand from your neck up to your mouth, uses the pad of his thumb to drop your lip from your mouth.

“I wanna see that smile baby.”

So you do as he says - caught in the dance of his palm pressing against your throat, your mouth falling into a grin each time, sometimes a small giggle leaving your mouth as you do, and then the release of the pressure, back and forth like that until you can feel that coil tightening low in your belly, your own hips bucking to meet his own, desperate to come apart beneath him.

“You gonna come, baby?” He asks, palm tightening once more, you can feel your walls fluttering around him, the coil pulled tight, you’re not going to last much longer, “That’s okay, I got you baby, just let go for me.”

It’s always been his voice that does it for you - the gentle lilt of that southern drawl, the way he’s always taking care of you. The coil snaps, his hand tightening just a little further as you arch up into him, much dropping open in a silent scream as pleasure floods every nerve ending in your body. You’re mildly aware of him talking you through it, showering praise over you as his own hips start to falter, hand finally torn from your neck, both of his palms settled on the mattress beside your head as he fucks you for real now.

The sound of skin slapping on skin fills the room, Joel’s ragged groans mixed with your own squeals, not quite recovered from your orgasm. You reach your hands up, settle them on his sides and look up at him.

“Want you…” You choke out, “Come inside me, Joel.”

He groans, low in his chest, body shaking as his hips stop. He lets out a moan of your name as you feel his cock throb inside you, the familiar warmth of his cum spilling inside you. Joel’s body falls forward, crowding yours as he buries his head into the crook of your neck, mouth warm as he kisses you.

You both stay like that for a while, breathing heavy until you feel his softening cock slip from you. He rolls onto his back, dragging you with him so you’re leaning against his sweat-slicked chest, fingers drawing patterns through the hair there.

Eyes filled with love, you look at him, give him a small smile as he brings a hand to your neck, tracing where his fingers had been pressing, “Looks red, baby,” His voice is gravelly, thick with sleep, “Was it okay?”

Taking hold of his wrist, you drag his hand up to your mouth and press kisses to his palm. The hand he has around your back drags you up a little and then he’s manoeuvring himself so his mouth can press kisses on the two finger marks he’s left on your skin. You think this might be the way you love him most, soft and sated, gentle and loving.

“I gotta go to the bathroom,” You whisper at him, “Stay right here okay?”

Joel reluctantly lets you go. You curse him every time you have to walk down the hall to the bathroom for not buying a home all those years ago with an en-suite, especially when, by the time you come back, he’s flat out on his back, lightly snoring.

You take a moment to stand in the doorway, look at him painted in moonlight. He’s beautiful like this, none of those worries he has etched on his face. You love him, more than you’ve ever loved anyone before.

Padding quietly over to the bed, you settle under the sheets, draping an arm over his middle, your head pillowed on his shoulder. In his sleep, he pulls you further into his body, arm over your shoulder, other hand resting on the arm you have draped across his tummy. If this is what peace feels like, then long let it last.

#Joel Miller x reader #Joel Miller x you #Joel Miller x female reader #Joel Miller x f!reader #Joel Miller #Joel Miller smut #Joel Miller fic #Joel Miller fanfic #Joel Miller fanfiction #Joel Miller fluff #Joel Miller kink #the last of us #the last of us hbo #tlou #tlou hbo #the last of us smut #tlou smut #the last of us fic #tlou fic #the last of us fanfic #tlou fanfic #the last of us fanfiction #tlou fanfiction #Joel tlou #Joel Miller tlou #Pedro pascal #Joel Miller Pedro Pascal #The Checklist

[supernaturalgirl20]

ok ok i have a joel x reader request. maybe after settling down in jackson, reader has some guys approaching her and flirting which makes joel feel insecure and like reader would be better off without him? she has to reassure him that he’s the one for her. maybe some smut but just very soft and loving perhaps

Love this request 🥰 thanks nonnie, hope you enjoy 😊

A Fool for You

Pairings: Joel Miller x f!reader

Warnings: Smut 18+, explicit, unprotected sex, slight age gap, insecure Joel, self doubt, flirting, slight jealousy, smidge of angst,cursing, fluff.

Comments and reblogs really appreciated 🥰

Joel waited patiently at the gates for the morning patrol party to return, more specifically, you. He hated when you did patrols without him, but Tommy had insisted you help out with the new crew that had arrived last month.

He’d grumbled about it, but you’d assured him you’d be fine. Joel knew you could handle yourself. That wasn’t the issue. He didn’t trust the new guys, not one bit. It didn’t help that they seemed enamoured with you. Always watching you with their lust-filled eyes. 

“They’re not back yet?” Ellie asked as she sidled up beside him. His gaze turned towards her, and he shook his head as he crossed his arms over his chest. 

“She’ll be ok, ya know? She can handle herself just fine.” Ellie was trying her best to reassure him, but he couldn’t shake the anxiety that had settled in the pit of his stomach. Ellie’s laugh startled him from his thoughts and when he met her gaze again, she was bowled over with laughter. 

“You’ve got it bad man.” She smacked his arm as she continued to laugh causing a scowl to form on his face. “Don’t know what you’re talkin’ bout”, he grumbled as he huffed out a breath, his gaze fixed firmly in the gate. 

“Sure ya don’t. You should just tell her how you really feel and then you can finally give her that ring you’ve been squirrelling away.” Ellie looked at him then with her eyebrows raised, a silent challenge for him to correct her but he didn't. 

How the hell did she find out about the ring? He thinks to himself as tries to steal his expression, not wanting to prove her right. Of course, Ellie would know how he truly felt. There wasn’t much he was able to keep hidden from her, she could read him like a book. 

“She loves you too, ya know? In case you were wondering. You two are about as subtle as a sledgehammer.” The sound of the gate opening captured her attention and she missed the way Joel’s face lit up. 

Did you really love him? He loves you. There’s no doubt in his mind about how he feels about you; he just doesn’t know if you feel the same. The relationship you both had was undefined, but you lived together, you slept in the same bed and took pleasure from each other’s bodies and to everyone in Jackson, you were Joel’s girl. 

Could you truly love him? 

Hope began to bloom deep inside him and when he saw you enter through the gate, he couldn’t help the smile that edged its way onto his face. 

“See I told you, she’s just fine,” Ellie’s voice sounded from beside him, startling him. He’d forgotten she was standing there and when he looked down at her she tilted her head in your direction. “Go on then. Go get her.”

“Ain’t, you supposed to be at school?” He asked, his eyebrow raised in question. She simply shrugs her shoulders before winking at him and turning to leave. He smirks after her, silently wondering how he got lucky enough to get a second chance at a normal life. 

“Hey, are you waiting here long? One of the new girls had a meltdown out there. It's what took so long to get back.” Joel’s eyes take you in, searching for any signs that you might have been hurt and when he finds none, he breathes a sigh of relief. 

“Not long. Just glad you’re ok. Ain’t lettin Tommy make this a regular thing though. I ain’t been able to sit still all mornin’.” 

You smile up at him as his gaze drifts to the others filing into the town behind you. He clenches his fists as he spots some of the new guys ogling you. The fuck they looking at?

He feels a rage begin to simmer beneath the surface of his skin and without thinking much about it he wraps his arms around you and crashes his lips to yours. You gasp at first, shocked by his sudden display of affection, something he never does but it quickly turns into a soft moan as he licks along your bottom lip and his hands grab your ass. 

What’s gotten into him? You think to yourself as you wind your hand around his neck. Just as it starts to get a little heated, he pulls away and glares over your shoulder. You follow his line of sight and suddenly it all makes sense. 

He’s jealous. 

Jake and Dillon are both glancing in your direction and his hands grip your hips a little tighter causing the smile on your face to widen. 

“You ain’t gotta worry about them Miller. I’m all yours.” You tease and he quickly glances at you before grumbling under his breath. You take his hand in yours and lead him away from the crowd gathered at the gate towards your shared home. 

“Come on, I’m starving. Let’s go home.”

***

Joel made sure after that - having threatened Tommy enough - that you were always on the same patrol. It always made him uneasy when you went out of Jackson without him. 

Everyone knew you were his lady. It didn’t have to be announced, it was just the way it was.

Apparently though, the new guys didn’t seem to get the message and with each patrol they began to flirt more with you, and it did nothing to help with his ever growing insecurities. 

He’d always felt like you were too good for him. Since way back in the Boston QZ and he ignored his feelings for you by hooking up with Tess. She knew of course, nothin slipped past that woman. 

You were smart, beautiful and a little bit younger and as time passed by and you became more settled into this new life, he began to question if you were better off without him. 

“Hey,” your voice startled him from his thoughts and as he looked up at you, leaning against the door to your shared room, he couldn’t help but smile. 

“Hey darlin’, everythin alright?” You nodded your head as you pushed away from the door frame. 

“Yep, just wanted to see if you wanted to come to the Tipsy Bison, the patrol crew are all meeting for a well-deserved drink.” You made your way towards him, settling yourself between his open legs and wrapping your arms around his neck. 

“Gotta head over to the stables and fix up the fence, but you head on over, as soon as I’m done, I’ll join ya.” He lifted his hand to brush some hair off your face, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. 

“M’okay.” His hand drifts behind your neck and pulls you close. His lips meet yours in a soft kiss before he pulls away and pats your ass. “Go on now, or we’ll both be late.”

You smile down at him as you peck his lips once more and turn to leave. Joel let out a sigh as the sound of the door closing echoed through the house. He needed to stop thinkin like that. 

***

Your laughter is the first thing he hears as he pushes open the door to the Tipsy Bison. It’s a sound he’s grown to love over the years you’ve been together, and it always brings a smile to his face. 

The smile quickly turns to a scowl though as he stands at the entrance, the door swishing behind him. His stomach twists into knots and his heart thunders within his chest when he sees you standing at the bar with Dillon. 

He’s clearly said something funny which explains your laughter but that’s not what bothers Joel. It’s the way he’s standing too close, his hand gently touching your arm. It’s the way his eyes keep drifting to your lips. 

Those doubts and insecurities simmer to the surface, and he panics. What if you want someone more like Dillon? Someone stronger. Someone younger. Joel can’t take it anymore and before you can spot him, he turns and leaves, making his way home. 

He bursts into the house, the front door slamming behind him echoing through the air as he rushes past the kitchen and up the stairs. 

“Hey, everything alright?” Ellie’s voice shouts after him but he doesn’t answer. “Okay then,” she mutters as she continues to fill her bag. 

***

The laughter dies in your throat the minute Dillon’s hand touches your arm. He was sweet and very funny, but you didn’t have any interest in him like that. Not when you were madly in love with Joel. 

As if your mind had conjured him, you see him in the doorway of the bar, his back to you as he makes a hasty exit. Was he not going to join you?

You're not sure what Dillon is talking about now that your mind is on Joel. With a wry smile you turn back towards him. “I’m gonna head out, ok?”

You down the rest of your whiskey and turn to leave but Dillon’s hand on your wrist stops you. 

“I thought we were having a good time,” he says, his tone a little clipped. Your eyes drift to where he’s touching you and you quickly pull your hand away. “Look, you’re a nice guy but I’m not interested. I love Joel. I’m his.”

“That old sack of shit,” he jeers, and you can feel the anger bubbling beneath the surface of your skin. 

“What did you say?” He laughs again and you clench your fist tight. “I said he’s an old sack of shi…”

“Fuck! You bitch.” He cries as you punch him squarely in the face. He holds his nose as blood flows freely from it, trickling down over his hand. 

“You better watch what you say about my man. Cause I ever hear you say shit like that again,” you lean in close, your breath tickling the skin of his neck. “I’ll rip your cock off. Got it?” 

He nods his head frantically before rushing out the door. The bar is silent now and you can feel Tommy behind you before he says anything. 

“Jesus, you and Joel are perfect for each other. I reckon he won’t bother ya again now. Hell, I reckon no man is gonna bother ya now.” His hand rests on your shoulder squeezing gently. 

“Good. Cause I’m already takin.” Tommy pats you on the back as he turns back towards the bar. You let out a sigh as you walk out of the bar and make your way home. You know that’s where he’s gone. 

“Hey, something happen with Joel? He stormed up the stairs like a moody teenager.” Ellie asks as you make your way into the kitchen.

“Not really sure but I’m gonna head up and see if he’s ok.” You furrow your brow when Ellie throws her backpack on. “Are you off somewhere?”

“Yeah, I’m heading over to Dina’s. I’m staying the night so don’t worry about me.” She gives you a tight hug before heading for the door and leaving. 

You close your eyes and take in a deep breath before ascending the stairs two at a time. Your hand hovers over the door handle of your shared room and you hope that he doesn’t shut you out this time. 

The door creaks as you push it open and you find Joel suiting on the bed facing the window. His shoulders are tense and you decide to crawl across the bed and wrap yourself around him. He tenses more when he feels your arms slip around his back towards his chest. 

“What are ya doin?” His voice is low, and you can feel the rumble of it as your head presses against his back. 

“What’s wrong? You’ve been a little off since I did that patrol on my own a couple of weeks back.” 

He sighs, leaning forward and placing his hands on his face. “Ain’t nothin’ wrong.”

“Ok, yeah, I don’t believe that for a second, baby. You can tell me anything, you know that right?”

“I don’t think this is gonna work out,” he mutters quickly through his hands. Your heart cracks just a little. Where the hell is this coming from?

“Joel,” you whisper as you pull away from his back and move to straddle him. He reluctantly moves his hands away from his face to grip your hips, making sure you don’t fall. 

His gaze settles on the window behind you but you're not having any of it. Reaching out to him, you gently place your hand on his cheek, and he closes his eyes at the feeling of you touching him. 

“Look at me please.” Your voice is soft, and you run your thumb along the stubble of his cheek. He takes a deep breath before slowly opening his eyes and meeting your gaze. 

“What’s going on, Joel? Are you really breaking up with me?” He swallows loudly, his eyes tracing the curve of your face before letting his eyes drift away. 

“No! Look at me and say it. Say you want this to end. That you don’t want me anymore.” It comes out a little harsher than you wanted but you need him to talk to you about what’s running through his head. 

“I ain’t good enough for ya, darlin’.” It’s almost a whisper but you heard him loud and clear. “You could have anyone you wanted. I’m just holdin ya back baby.”

“Now hold on a minute, where are you getting this from. Joel, baby.” You grab his face with both hands and force him to look at you. “You are not holding me back. You make me better, in every way and I couldn’t live without you. So please don’t make me.”

“You should be with someone closer in age. Someone like Dillon.” That’s when it clicks. 

“I don’t want him. I don’t want anyone that isn’t you. Never have, never will. Joel, you're stuck with me. Besides, you ain’t that much older than me, baby. I love you.”

His breath hitches. You love him. His eyes glaze over with unshed tears and a smile tugs at the corners of his mouth. “You-you love me?” 

“Afraid so. You, Joel Miller, are the love of my life. You ain’t too old for me. You may be a little bit grumpy but, you wouldn’t be you if you weren’t.” 

He grabs your ass and pulls you close, resting his head in the crook of your neck. He breathes you in savouring the feel of you in his arms. His heart beats wildly as he utters those words back. 

“I love you too, darlin’.” You run your fingers through his hair, and he hums contentedly. “You are sure I’m what you want?” He asks as he pulls back to look at you. 

“Let me show you how much I want you.” He gulps as you remove your jacket and top, tossing them onto the floor behind you. His eyes widen, transfixed by your form as you make quick work of removing your bra.

You slip off his lap and remove your trousers, taking your underwear off with them. “Fuck, you’re beautiful,” he whisper as his eyes trail the length of your naked body. 

You bend, pulling off his boots and socks before running your hands up along his jean clad thighs. Undoing his belt, you reach for his zipper and he lifts his hips as you pull his jeans off. 

His breathing is ragged as you straddle his waist again, hands running up his chest reverently. His arousal is hard against you and he closes his eyes and groans when you run your slick along it.

With delicate fingers, you slowly undo the buttons of his shirt, rolling it off his shoulders. You giggle at the sight of the grey t-shirt he has underneath. 

“Why do you always have to wear so many layers?” He smiles at you and shrugs his shoulders. “Think it’s cause I’m….”

You place your finger against his lips, “if you say you’re old, i'm gonna slap you baby.” He chuckles, slipping his arms around your waist and pulling you flush against him. 

“M’okay. I won’t say it so.” His eyes are focused on your lips, and you lean in and capture his in a searing kiss. You swallow the moan he lets out as you slowly grind against him. 

“Wanna take care of you, baby,” you whisper against his lips. He doesn’t answer. He can’t. He’s too damn horny. 

You push at his chest, forcing him onto his back and the way he’s looking up at you sends a shiver down your spine. 

You don’t speak. You don’t want to ruin the moment with words, so you grab his length in your hand and pump him twice before you line him up and sink down on him. He whimpers, his hands gripping your hips tight as he keeps his gaze focused on where he disappears inside you. 

It’s slow, sensual as you roll your hips above him. You’re focused on him, on his pleasure as you try to reassure him with your body that he’s it for you. 

You can feel your pleasure build and as your orgasm washes over you, Joel makes a strangled noise below you. His eyes are wide open, glazed over with lust as he focuses on the way your breasts bounce slightly. He moves his hand from your hip to squeeze your breast, pinching your pebbled nipple between his fingers and you moan softly as you clench around him. 

His breathing becomes more ragged, and you know he’s close. You ride him a little harder and he trembles as he nears his release. He groans out your name as his body jerks, spurting hot ropes of cum inside you. You both pant loudly, his grip on your hips loosening as he pulls you down towards him. He doesn’t pull out, wanting to stay connected to you for a little longer. 

“So, have I convinced you you’re it for me?” You whisper into his chest. Joel smiles, lifting your chin towards him and he connects his lips with yours. “Don’t know darlin’. Might need a little more convincin’.” 

You smack his chest, and he chuckles, pulling you close. “Hey,” he says as he grabs your hand. “Why is your hand bruisin’?” You shrug your shoulders and nuzzle back into his chest. “Let’s just say, you aint gotta worry about Dillon no more.” His eyebrows arch and his chest expands with pride. You really are his lady.

He knows that you love him. That he loves you and that you are all he needs. You and Ellie. His gaze drifts towards his bedside locker where the ring he found a couple of months back lays sitting in a black box. 

A smile plays across his face. He’s gonna have to ask you now. Ask you to be his wife. Maybe then - when you’re wearing his ring on your finger, sharing his name - the men of Jackson will think twice about flirting with what’s his. 

Everything: @maievdenoir @amneris21 @hnt-escape @elegantduckturtle @harriedandharassed @jediknight122 @ayrusss @hayley-the-comet @sherala007 @alexxavicry @scorpio-marionette @donnaa @practicalghost @tanzthompson @beskarprincessjenny @littlemisspascal @icanbeyourjedi @thatpinkshirt @maryfanson @sunnshineeexoxo @misspearly1 @misspearlssideblog @athalien @its--fandom--darling @sara-alonso @doommommy @browneyes-issac @trickstersp8 @nembees @kaitieskidmore1 @mswarriorbabe80 @allthe-ships @tintinn16 @hungrhay @rosie-posie08 @manuymesut @all-the-way-down-here @iccedays @tusk89 @graciexmarvel @pedrostories @musings-of-a-rose @untitledarea @your-voice-is-mellifluous @majestyjade @avengersfan25 @angstismydrug @everythingfan @pedrosbum @ryangoslingstanktop

#pedro pascal #joel miller x reader #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x you #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal x female reader #pedro pascal fanfiction #joel miller x fem!reader

[themotherofblood]

byka perzys | part two

rosy riñītsos | part one | masterlist

Dark!Daemyra Targaryen x Crybaby!Reader

A/N: y’all filthies were hungry for part two so here we go, again do not come at me. This is very taboo with dad Daemon and step mom Rhaenyra. Feel free to skip this if it ain’t your cup of tea; I have other vanilla ones. A little angsty start!! Not proof read. I’m going to bed lol I will do it later :)

tw: naive reader, dubcon-ish,breastfeeding (lactation kink), infantilism, incest!, spanking.

It has been eight moons since Rhaenyra Targaryen claimed the Iron Throne, it had been a bloody affair truly- her own kin beheaded and hanging off the gates of the Red Keep as an example.

Usurp the throne and pay its price.

People that Y/N once called family all hung from the gates, her favourite aunt in chains with her little cousins. Daemon and Rhaenyra did their best to keep their children away from the monstrosity that followed with war, however keeping Jace, Luke, Baela and Rhaena proved to being harder. They won the throne regardless with every green supporter executed or incarcerated. Only after Rhaenyra secured her position did she send for her eldest daughter to be brought to King’s Landing from Dragonstone.

The battle had turned both Rhaenyra and Daemon bitter, while to the court they had begun celebrating their victory. With enormous galas being thrown for their children’s engagements. Both Jace and Baela being named future heir to the throne, they had begun being more involved in the politicking while Rhaena and Luke began to make journeys with their grandfather Corlys.

You felt alone in it all- Joff, Aegon and Viserys were all little making them the joy of everyone’s eyes and what remained of you? A mere bastard girl at court with nothing to her name. You were happy that the war ended, that your mother sat the throne; your family whole. You had spent all your life hidden, buried in your books or lost in the gardens. You didn’t care much for courtly attention, what you did care for were your kepa and mūna.

You went from nursing yourself to sleep in between them for many moons to the war making them forget of your existence, you waited, you truly did. However as the days passed, the more scared you became. You would cry yourself to sleep with fear of death, and now you felt alone. You stood at court and yet no one saw you. A giant table set for supper and yet there was just you awaiting your family. They never came.

You had found solace elsewhere, making multiple trips with your lady’s maids to the city as everybody made efforts to sew Kings Landing back to its proper glory, many of Daemon’s gold cloaks would accompany you; not wanting to loose their heads to dark sister. You offered baskets of milk, clothing and food out to the people of flea bottom and perhaps in those few hours you spent with the common people. You felt more seen than you had in over six months, your visits became frequent, and while Daemon and Rhaenyra believed you were holed up deep in the libraries in the Red Keep; you read stories to children at the Blackwater beaches.

You learned of tales of your own birth and how you might have been one of these common people had your father not been so considerate of his own blood. It warmed you heart and yet upset you more. He never spoke of your birth mother and you never questioned him on the matter, not until you sent out your lady’s maid to find the tavern you took birth in. It was weeks until they returned with the name of the tavern, which too they relayed to you with hesitation. A princess in a tavern…blasphemy.

You had found your people, while your mother perished while birthing you, an older tavern wench recognized your lilac eyes the second you set foot into her establishment, they cared for you the first eight moons of your existence until gold cloaks came knocking down their door to retrieve you for your kepus, the King. They did not fight, mayhaps their one child of many would be raised in riches. They closed the bar down as they celebrated your return.

Everyone of the barmaids began hounding you with questions.

“Do ya remember us little lady?” one questioned “I bathed you as babey”

“Aye- but I named ya little fires!” a woman named Chataya replied.

“Tell us litte fires, have ya gotten one of those monsters?” the older woman questioned, you happily smiled as you nodded your head.

“Vermithor.” you said smiling ear to ear.

“Vermithor!” they all cheered as they raised their cups of ale, making you flinch but giggle along. You spent a better part of that afternoon basking in happiness, there wasn’t a single room in the Red Keep that spread with this much joy at your presence.

That evening at the square named you the Princess of Flea Bottom.

A fitting title for a very different reason from when Daemon was named the very thing for his whoring habits.

Just as always even tonight, other than Joffrey everybody seemed to have found themselves occupied.

“Sorry sister, there are council matters.” Jacearys apologised on his and Baela’s behalf for their inability to join you for supper. Lucearys and Rhaena had extended their stay at Driftmark. You had spent the better part of supper scraping your peas from one end to the other as Joffrey went on about his new horse gifted to him by some lord- Massey? Baremon? You weren’t sure which.

“A proper princess finishes her food!” the shrill voice of Septa Marlow scolded you yet again.

That night you attempted something you would have never tried before, you frustrations seemed to have frozen your nervousness as you pattered your way over to the royal apartments in Maegor’s Holdfast with a book in one hand and a doll in another. Hoping that tonight Daemon might read to you for the night, you wouldn’t even beg to lay with them; merely spend a few moments in their company. The queensgaurd placed by their doors already had succumbed to slumber as he leaned against the wall. Your meek nature made it far to easy to evade him as you entered the Queen’s apartments.

The door to their bed chambers were slightly parted as you heard chatter from within, a burst of joy spread through you. After much time they had been in their bed chambers at an acceptable hour, perhaps tonight you might sleep all through the dark skies till the sun graced King’s Landing. You smiled to yourself, already the forming the sentence of request in your head so you wouldn’t stammer while speaking. Running the words over your head twice before approaching the door.

You peaked in, immediately freezing as your knock barely reached the door. You eyes fixated on the image within the chambers. Your heart sunk, small twitches of anxiety moved through your fingers as your gaze fell upon a girl stood in between Daemon and Rhaenyra. Daemon’s lips attacking her neck as she suckled at Rhaenyra’s breasts, your feet took you backwards. Knocking over the vase placed on a side table by the door, a loud crash through the corridor.

Daemon’s eyes immediately shot to the door, furious at whoever would dare interrupt the Queen and her consort, and even more who would dare to peak in. He pushed the whore on the bed and unsheathed his dagger, ready to swing it at whomever he would find at their chamber doors. He heard hurried shuffling feet as pushed the door open with all its might, the queensgaurd placed at the door looking disheveled as he appeared to make himself look coherent. He stumbled to no evidence to who the onlooker might have been, other than a book laid on the ground.

He picked up the book, turning it to read it’s cover. A tale of romance that perhaps only one person would have read it in all of the Red Keep. He shook his head, cursing himself at what you might have seen as he returned inside to grab his cloak. He threw the book at his wife, who looked at him questioningly; she frowned at the cover as Daemon apologized to the doe eyed whore that both Daemon and Rhaenyra would have enjoyed tormenting.

“Sorry pet, here’s your gold.” He placed four gold coins on her lap before leaving to find you.

You ran as fast as your feet would allow, hiking your skirts with both hands as your discarded your doll by the servants chambers, everyone of them shouting at you; concerned of your well being. You had managed to climb over boxes just as you did with trees and jumped over the lower walls, ridding yourself of the Red Keep. You hated it here, you wanted to go home. You wanted everyone to just return to the days at Dragonstone. The metal fencing tugged at your skirts, ripping through a good inch or two of your lavender skirts and dug into the skin of thigh, drawing blood that in the moment you hadn’t registered somewhere in the scuffle you had also misplaced a slipper, leaving your one foot bare as you escaped. You just ran, escaping the vile portrait of another girl nursing on your mother.

Pushing through crowds of people as you ran towards the Dragonpit, Vermithor had already felt your inner turmoil, growling and freeing himself of his chains as he stomped his way out of his holding to the courtyard; awaiting your arrival as he still growled at the dragonkeeper trying to settle him down. They already knew the sudden outraged behaviour of the bronze dragon had to do with your arrival, in the darkness however they couldn’t tell a thing.

You ran towards your dragon, looking behind you to see if anyone followed which you were sure they would. Your father might have been as furious as you were at them, if not worse.

“Vhalar Vermithor!” you yelled at him.

“Soves!”

You hurried to pull yourself onto his wing, yanking your body up onto your leathered saddle. “Sovētēs!” you ordered once more before your dragon pushed its wings back to fly towards the dark skies. You hadn’t even bothered to tie yourself to him, you just held on as your heart hammered within your chest.

Daemon arrived to the dragonpit moments later, already finding a torn piece of your dress stained in blood and your doll discarded at the servant grounds, he cursed under his breath as Caraxes was brought out of his holding. He wasted no time in mounting his dragon after he made sure that the dragon keepers would send word to his wife. Caraxes would hunt them down to be sure, he had to.

Vermithor flew for hours to be sure; you had not a clue of where he took you. Your mind toiled of far worse things.

What were you thinking? The court didn’t want you and neither did your kin. The word bastard began to ring in your ears as you cried high above the clouds. The more Vermithor flew the more it became apparent that he was flying north, the air began to grow colder until he finally landed upon a strip of mountains. You sighed, looking around at the hill forests as you shuffled off him. You yelped out loud feeling the throb in your thigh, you began trembling again.

You wanted to go home.

You wanted to go back to Dragonstone.

Vermithor grunted, already irked that you had distrupted his sleep and yet he sympathized with your sorrow, the cold that had began to seep into your bones that your torn summer gown did nothing to shield you from. The bronze fury let out a gust of fire, circling around himself and you to keep him warm as he snuggled himself on the grass. You shuffled closer to his neck as you rested against the warm reptilian skin, crying into your hands. Afraid and alone.

Daemon had flown for hours, Caraxes had lost the scent of your dragon past the burning ruins in the Riverlands. He returned at dawn, failing to find you as he stomped into his chambers. He explained it all to Rhaenyra who looked terrified, hurrying to send out ravens to every lord to seek for a bronze dragon and their princess dressed in lavender. Daemon made trips himself, scouring through Dragonstone and Driftmark first, knowing the Vermithor spent most his time on those lands. To no avail.

He regretted no reaching out to you sooner, most of it was to blame the monstrosity that clouded Rhaenyra and his blood at the aftermath of the war. The enjoyed paying whores to leave those girls bruised by the morning, how were they to do that two their own zaldrititos. They couldn’t bare the thought of touching you while their demons ran wild in the sheets, you were far too pure to taint so early. Many night they’d free themselves of the council at late hours, Daemon himself would return covered in blood after he “interrogated” the green sympathisers. He’d peer into your bed chambers just as Rhaenyra would, watching a small frown that they would pet away from your sleeping body.

You had fallen asleep at some point, the simmering burnt grass lulled your sobbing frame to sleep as you hid under Vermithor’s wing. Come morning you woke within the same burnt circle, the sun glaring in your eyes as Vermithor rested from a few feet from you; nibbling on a roasted sheep. You shuffled up, groaning at the throb on your thigh, some where along the night the cut had stopped bleeding but left a better part of your gown soaked in blood.

You groaned as you stood up, looking around to have an inkling of where you might be, you limped toward Vermithor. Petting his skin.

“Can you take me home? Dragonstone?” you asked him, hoping he’d be done with his meal soon. His yellow eyes merely looked at you from his periphery before thudding his head to the ground to rest. “Please?”

He moved his snout to push the leftover sheep towards you, before closing his eyes to slumber.

You had begun to venture around the edge of the woods, luckily finding a pond to wash your wound. More tears followed as the gash burned anew, the cruel cold water bringing you much discomfort. Hours went past, you had begged your bronze dragon to take you home a dozen times, to no avail. He had begun to drag himself to a mountain cave, holding his fresh kill within his mouth as he huffed every two breaths; awaiting your limping frame to keep up with him.

Perhaps this was your home now, you were hungry, and ate around the cooked flesh of the kills Vermithor would hunt, you were in pain. Both physically and mentally, perhaps they didn’t care, perhaps they threw another gala as they were rid of their bastard daughter.

“What if she never returns Daemon?” Rhaenyra sighed as she held rocked baby Visenya to bed. “She won’t survive out there.”

“I know that! Don’t you think I know that?” Daemon snapped, still beating himself over your disappearance. “She has her dragon with her, he will protect her.”

Various lords around the seven kingdoms sent out watch parties, hoping to spot the princess or atleast her dragon. Four days past and not a word, until finally a white raven arrived from The Vale. A parchment containing the sightings of Vermithor atop their mountains and talks of Hill tribes and Mountain men attacking whatever that dragon was trying to hide. All attempts to make contact were met with dragon fire, killing the Knights of The Vale and Hill tribes alike.

Daemon was enraged as he rushed to mount Caraxes, armed with Dark Sister while he rode with all his might to arrive at the Eyrie before the dusk began to decorate the horizon. They pointed toward the taller peak, warning him of Mountain men all guarding the cave for any sitting of the bronze fury. Daemon flew above with Caraxes, watching as the savages below shoot arrows and boulder like rocks in the cave; above all he heard the furious roars of Y/N’s dragon. He had burned every last one of them in a fit of rage, the glowing carnage could be seen from miles below the mountains as Caraxes landed with a thud just outside the caves. Daemon approached the dark cave with stealth, singing a Valyrian lullaby that his grand sire sung for his dragon, one that he sang with Y/N while he helped her claim the enormous beast.

You hid behind your dragon’s tail, groaning in pain as a rock yet again bruised your skin. The first two days stop the mountain were peaceful. You had found yourself berries that kept your fed just enough to curb the rumbling, the fresh water pond helped both you and Vermithor and the gash on your thigh began dry as your cleaned them with washed leaves. Your dress on the other hand, went from lavender to dirt brown in no time, your feet covered in little cuts at you rid yourself of your only slipper. Your family consisted of Vermithor and little cave bugs, that was until the people Vermithor was stealing sheep and goats from came knocking- charging at your door.

You had fought them for two days, with barely enough sleep as they kept throwing things and shooting at Vermithor. He burned them and yet more came, then came knights who knew your name. Perhaps green sympathizers that wanted your head, you burned them too. You cowered behind Vermithor sobbing until you heard a familiar lullaby, you cried louder in your hands, you feared you had succumbed to madness.

“Y/N! Riñītsos?” you heard Daemon’s voice bellow in the darkness. You were sure somebody had come for you, and it sure wasn’t Daemon. You huffed pulling yourself onto Vermithor, hoping to scare away whoever it was.

“Dracarys.” you said, making Vermithor let out a blow of fire around the cave. You sat atop him with agony and rage in your eyes, you were exhausted and were sure you would die by the end of the fortnight. That was until the warm glow of the fire flashed the white haired figure stood at the entrance of the cave.

“nyke issa riñītsos.” his voiced echoed through the cave.

“k-kepa?” you bottom lip wobbled as you shuffled off of Vermithor, barely able to hold your own weight together.

As much as Daemon wanted to run to grab you, he couldn’t. The bronze fury still held a murderous stance towards him, he had to wait for you. You feet slowly limped forward to him, clearing your eyes in the little light that remained in the burning darkness. You whispered his name once more to which he replied, holding his arms out until he saw your body in the light.

Frail, your dress covered in soot, dirt and blood. The braids on your hair undone and unruly, stained in dirt and blood too. Wounds on your arms and a bleeding cut on your head, Daemon took in a sharp breath once he finally had you in his arm, you collapsed- whimpering as he rushed to cover your body with his cloak.

“Iksā ȳgha, iksan vaoreznuni.” He whispered against your temple as he pushed you hair away. Daemon carried you to Caraxes, helping you mount him first before situating himself behind you. He was perturbed to be sure, that you would be so reckless but in the moment he felt nothing but relief as he flew back to the Red Keep with you in his arms.

Two days, it had been two days as you graced the world of consciousness and then drifted to slumber again. The day Daemon returned to the Red Keep, carrying your cloaked frame in his arms as your lady’s maids rushed to care for you. Both Rhaenyra and him and sat through the ordeal as the cleaned your wounds, he wanted to backhand every one of your maids as your hissed and cried out as the girls tended your wounds. Upon being tucked in bed, Daemon sat with you for hours, humming a lullaby under his breath as he caressed your silver wisps.

When you had awoken for sure, you had jolted awake. Eyes darting over your canopy until they fell upon Rhaenyra and Daemon sat next to your bed. Both looked tired and yet furious, their faces reminded you of what you had seen, soon filling your relieved heart with bitterness.

“What were you thinking?” Rhaenyra questioned darkly, leaning forward to rest her elbows on her knees.

“The Queen asked you something.” Daemon said in addition.

You scoffed at the two of them, frowning at their audacity to question you after what they had done. You groaned as you sat up, shuffling yourself off your bed from the other end. The poppy you were sure they made you consume, helped with your aching joints. Daemon’s chair scrapped as he approached you, holding your arms firmly in his hands as he questioned you once more.

“Nothing, my queen.” you said bitterly, fighting to tear yourself away from his grip.

Your tone irked her even more, far more than you using her title to defy her. “We don’t ask you for much, that you remain with us, and obey us.” she lectured “Perhaps we have been to lenient with you.”

You still said nothing as you scowled at the floor, “Do you know what they do to the girls at Old Town? The ones that behave as poorly as you have!” Daemon scolded you this time as he dragged your body back to your bed. You fought harder against his hold only irking them further.

Daemon held your body down as they plopped you on your belly. You felt them shuffle over you before Rhaenyra lifted your sleep shift from your backside, hastily pulling away at your small clothes.

“Let me go!” you screamed “Damn you, damn both of you!”

Daemon held you face down, muffling your screams as you felt the leather resting against your rear. “How many days did we not sleep proper , sweet wife?”

“Seven days.” she replied with venom in her voice.

“Seven hits.” Daemon agreed. “You better count them!” he warned you.

You felt the first hit throb against your rear, you bit your lip to starve them of a reaction. Another slash of the leather burned against your rear. “You better count if you want her to stop.” Daemon tutted.

“Go to hell!” you spat.

They had not a clue of why you acted this way, surely they would have explained what you saw but your defiance angered them way beyond measure. They wanted their meek, shy girl to return, even if they had to spank it back into you.Another harder hit radiated through your bottom, this time you cried out; only to be hit again when you finally screamed out “One!”

“Have you a clue of how afraid we were?” Daemon scolded along with the leather connecting to your arse again.

“The Vale knights you have killed? The damage alone!” Rhaenyra yelled before spanking you again.

“What if something happened to you? Do you see the wounds under a fortnight alone?” Daemon loosened his hold on you as you succumbed to your punishment, now fighting to sob.

“You could have been killed!” Rhaenyra bellowed as she got her last hit in.

You scurried forward into the bed as Daemon let you go, you hugged your knees as you shielded your face away from them. Your muña would have yelled at you once more but Daemon pulled her out of your chambers as she heaved in anger.

They hated you.

They left you to ponder over what you had done, you killed people, you ran away from home. You were horrible and they hated you now. You hadn’t realized when you began to sob but you did, you lady’s maids visited once to stoke the fires by the hearth before leaving. You sobbed into a pillow, letting every last shred of emotions in your body wet through the silk of your pillow.

Rhaenyra resumed court for the day, still fuming at what her daughter had done. Reparations were made of the dead knights to the Vale as Daemon did his best to calm her down. Perhaps they had gone two far in punishing you, however you needed to understand if not fear leaving this castle ever again. She would have chained you to the bed for all she cared, fighting this hard to sheild you from a war. Atleast her sons knew how to fight, her step daughter by Laena were fierce. You were mouse disguised a dragon, spoiled endlessly. She hated that it had resorted to this and would comfort you sooner than later.

Daemon on the other hand had handed her his belt, the simmering rage he had felt as he held your frail body back to the keep, unsure if you were dead or just asleep in his arms. The pained screams he had to hear as they cleaned your wounds, all because you were too stupid to ask them or yell at them instead of running. He hated himself too, he should have known better. Known that she would wither if left alone for far too long.

They approached your room way after supper, trays of untouched food remained outside your chambers as a lady’s maid informed them of your refusal to move. Rhaenyra huffed as she picked the tray of supper as Daemin held the door open for her, it had been a while since she had fed you herself.

You still remained the fetal position in your bed, small whimpers left your body as the pushed through the bed curtains. At first she believed you were crying your sleep, a prank of guilt ran through them as they saw your reddened rear peaking through your sleep shift.

It wasn’t until you whimpered out more words that they realized you were awake, regressed to a mere child afraid of monster as you cried.

“I-I want to go home,” you said through hiccups.

“You are home,” Daemon whispered as he pulled your onto his lap.

“D-dragonstone, home,” you whimpered.

“Oh, zaldrititos. This is our home now,” Rhaenyra cooed at her.

“No, not my home- daor!” you wailed louder, only growing more distressed as you refused to look at them “Ao vēdros nyke! Daor nyke!”

Rhaenyra gasped, “No- we could never hate you.”

“Always want our riñītsos,” Daemon whispered against your temple.

You shook your head as more furious tears fell from your eyes “The girl! I saw her, s-she was feeding on muña. You want her, n-not me.”

You began to shuffle away from her as reached forward to touch your face “We were afraid of hurting you sweet pea, I never get this angry but we have fought so hard to keep all of you safe.”

“Not knowing where you were was death, do you understand? I couldn’t breathe knowing you were out there, alone.” Rhaenyra confessed.

“You have been alone and angry, we are so sorry riñītsos,” Daemon said as he pushed your hair away. “We should have come for you sooner.”

Daemon began to pepper kisses down your face as Rhaenyra approached you again, this time you let her touch you as she caressed over your bandages.

“kepa,” you whimpered as more tears fell from your eyes. “muña,”

“You need to eat,” he whispered in your ear, nudging you to sit up right. You whined, I wanting to untangle this cocoon you had craved for months. “No, just be here.”

Your tummy grumbled and yet your refused to let this warmth wash away for a stupid cut of steak or mutton. You nuzzled your nose in the peaking curve of Rhaenyra’s bosom, hoping she would let you nurse on her; you felt far to dazed to be refused of such tenderness. Rhaenyra being a mother new exactly what you wanted, she shuffled backwards, tugging at the front strings of her dress robes. Her breasts spilling through the loosely tied corset.

You hungrily latched at her pink nipple, all too inviting at your groaned the second the sweet milk hit your tongue. She tapped your nose to make your suckle gently at her sore breasts and yet your happily lapped as your nurses on her. Daemon shuffled away making you whine, he shook his head at your impatience. Which soon turned to joy as he returned with your discarded doll in one hand; dressed in a brand new red and black dress. His other hand held the book you wanted him to read to you. He slotted himself back in yet again as you smiled around Rhaenyra’s breast.

Daemon read through passages like melted butter to the tongue, with every pause he pressed a kiss to you temple or caressed through Rhaenyra’s hair. Before Daemon flipped through the first chapter you had switched to the other breast as you suckled her dry. One thing was to be sure, it would be a while before her miles dried up for good. Not that she cared as she doted over the contentment that washed over your features

You felt content, warm and safe. You were bathed and clean, fed and sated as your were cuddled in between the two people you loved the most. You muña letting your hair as your kepa read you to sleep, the wars had ended, the blood shed seized and perhaps just for a moment. The Red Keep felt like home.

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[morallyinept]

Summary: Joel Miller comes back into your life unexpectedly after a gap of thirty years, and stirs up all kinds of memories and longing. Now, as you're stationed on an outpost for five days alone with the man you stupidly let go of all those years ago, you have a chance to confront him about your past life together and all the things you wished you’d said and done.

But Joel’s different now, and you know you need to tread carefully. Joel Miller is not the same man you once knew in another life.

A slow burn romance set in the post apocalyptic world, approx. twenty or so years after the initial Cordyceps outbreak.

Pairing: Post-Outbreak Joel Miller x MatureF!Reader (No name or physical description of reader. However reader is of a similar age range as Joel; in her late forties/early fifties. Joel is slightly older at 56.)

Chapter word count: 2.7k

Series Masterlist

☝🏻See Series Masterlist for full smut warnings & triggers in this story. Chapters that contain smut or triggers will be highlighted in the chapter notes below. 👇🏻

Chapter notes: Mentions and descriptions of smut.

It's here, the final chapter. What an emotional rollercoaster we've been on in this series! Thank you so much to everyone who has read, commented, re-blogged and enjoyed this journey with Joel with and Reader. Love you all! 🖤

Enjoy! 🖤

Previous Chapter

1988...

C’mon, ya bein’ stupid. M’tryin’ to watch the game.

Don’t call me stupid, Joel. 

Hey! I was watchin’ that!

I’m not stupid! 

Well, ya sure acting like it, ain’t ya?

You’re such an asshole!

Real original, darlin’. Gimme the remote.

Look, just because I want better for myself doesn’t mean that-

What d’fuck ya mean ya want better? 

That's not what I meant-

That’s what ya fuckin’ said, ain’t it?

Joel. You’re twisting my words. 

No. You fuckin’ said ‘em. 

I can’t talk to you when you’re like this! 

Ya think you're better than me ‘cause you got a fuckin’ college education?

What? Why would you even say that?

M’fuckin’ workin my ass off on the site n’ it ain’t good enough for ya? M’not good enough for ya anymore, is that it?

Joel. Don’t-

You'd rather be off gallivantin’ ‘bout with your stupid friends without me?

I wanna see the world, Joel. What’s wrong with that?

Fine. Go fuckin’ see it. I’ve never stopped ya. See if I fuckin’ care. 

Joel, stop it. I’m trying to talk to you.

No, ya talkin’ to me like I’m dumb. I ain't dumb. Get offa me. 

Joel! 

I said get offa me! Ya wanna leave, then leave. M’tried of fightin’ ‘bout it. Far be it for an uneducated fuckwit to stand in your way, darlin’. 

Joel…

M’goin’ to bed.

You didn’t know it then, but that was the last argument you’d have with Joel.

You climbed into bed beside him later on and he was rolled over, back facing you and unbeknownst to you, still awake. The anger wouldn’t let him sleep. 

He’d wanted so desperately to turn over and pull you into his arms, to whisper that he still loved you, but he didn’t. He held strong. He was tired of being the one that always caved first, apologised first for arguments he hadn’t instigated.

He wasn't going to apologise for not having a college education and working as soon as he left high school anymore. 

He was tired of being compared and judged by your snarky friends, who, Joel thought, didn’t really respect you much either by the way they’d treated you on occasions. He’d been the one who held you when you cried over them.

But you were easily led and influenced by them, and it was almost as if the person you had become was partly due to their subtle moulding of you. You wanted more, they had more. It wasn't easy to see that and do the maths.

They were turning you against him and there was nothing he could do to prove to you anymore that he loved you so fucking much. It wasn’t enough anymore. 

All he could do was throw himself into work that morning to forget about the anger as he ground down on his teeth all day. 

He was at work when you’d packed your things, and he’d returned home to an empty apartment that he could barely afford on the shitty side of town. But he’d rented it for you; the both of you, so you could start a wonderful life together like you’d spoken about so many times before. 

But you’d gone.

Every part of you had vanished. And you didn’t come back, not this time. And Joel hadn’t really known how to deal with it when you didn’t return his frantic calls.

He went out, got shitfaced drunk, slept all weekend in his piss and vomit, and then went to work again on the Monday, hungover and gravely irritable.

That was how it went on a cycle until days passed into months in a vacant blur. Then he met a girl who smiled at him when he stopped in for a coffee on his lunch break. 

She was new at the coffee shop and complimented him on his eyes, even though they were sad. He took her out for pizza and she made him laugh again, and she ended up staying at his place.

She slept on your side of the bed.

Over time, she pushed you towards the back of Joel’s mind. Nine months later and she was pushing Sarah out of her, and Joel was holding his tiny daughter inside his arms covered in gooey placenta chunks and beaming at her, feeling that he finally made sense in the world, despite being innately terrified. 

He’d called Tommy and told him he was an uncle. He’d called his parents. He’d wanted to call you and tell you. So fucking badly. 

A year or so after Sarah’s first word - which to his pride was dada - Joel was a single parent after her mom upped and left one day out of the blue.

He woke to find a note left by the coffee maker informing him they were on their own, and Joel’s heart fell out of his ass for the second time.

Another one who had left without warning or explanation; it was hard to not develop a small complex about that as he grew in age and height, and put dating on the permanent back bench.

He had to do this alone now; raise Sarah all by himself and the thought fucking paralysed him.

He was convinced he would be a failure. A deadbeat. That he would fuck her up in some way. But he didn’t. If you were to ask Joel now, he’d say that she took care of him more than he probably did with her.

He worked every hour God sent so he could provide for her, so she could have everything she needed. He couldn’t have been more proud of her, and the night she gifted him back his watch fixed on his birthday, was probably the best gift he’s ever been given.

Aside from her, of course. His baby girl. 

And then in 2003, on that fateful day and ironically, Joel's birthday, the world went to shit, and Joel lost Sarah. His baby girl. 

He lost his sole reason for being, and he glanced down at his wrist, at that watch reminding him of that loss, as he raised the gun to his temple.

I'll see you real soon, baby girl.

Joel pulled the trigger.

Present day...

Joel glances at his watch now, forever frozen at the time of Sarah’s death; cracked glass with the bullet that ricocheted off of it and killed her on that fateful night that took everything from him. 

An icon forever strapped around his wrist that reminds him of everything he’s lost when he glances at it thinking it still works sometimes; an unconscious action that circles round foolishness.

He realises his mistake and drops his wrist listlessly. It’s hot out, the warmth of the summer licking at the back of his neck and turning it evermore pink before it tans.

He rubs sawdust from his hands down his jeans, reaching for the wood plank. 

“Hey you,” your voice chirps to him, interrupting his dark recall, and he turns around, squinting in the sun.

You hold out a brown paper bag that you push into his hands. “Brought you a sandwich,” you beam.

“Shouldn’ta done that.” Joel blushes as he leans in for a kiss. The feel of your lips brushing gently against his makes his fingertips buzz and he moans gently into your mouth. A sound that you will never tire of.   

���Y’want some lemonade? C’mon, get outta this sun for a bit,” Joel leads you by the hand under the canopy of his workshop in the commune a few weeks later after you’ve both returned from the outpost. 

Your return was an emotional one, one that you both approached with tentative footsteps. The moment you were reunited with Max, Sal and Guthrie, sharing in your devastation for the loss of Kelper, Joel was resolute in giving you the space to let you grieve with them.

But you pulled him back and instructed him in no uncertain terms that him being away from you was the last thing you wanted or needed. 

I need you, Joel.

M’right here, darlin’. Ain’t goin’ nowhere. He’d assured you.

Joel was true to his word, clutching on tightly to your hand at the memorial for Kelper and all those that had fallen with him that day. A small ceremony with wild flowers and hand carved stones that were laid to rest in the chapel’s garden.

A peaceful, contemplative space that you visited daily, regaling Kepler’s stone with your thoughts from the day, things that had happened. Tending to and keeping the space trimmed and neat. And Joel always let you have that time alone with him. 

He cradled you in his arms as you finally fell asleep after the tears had stopped falling. That night, unable to sleep, you went for a walk around the commune whilst Joel was dead to the world. 

"I don't know if I can do this."

Of course you can, Goose. Kelper walked beside you, or at least that's where he told you he'd always be now. 

Besides, you just got him back, are you gonna let him go again? 

You shake your head. "I'm scared, Kelper."

I know. Wouldn't be right if you weren't. Trust me.

"I miss you." You sniffled. 

I'm always here when you need me. Kelper smiled.  

Joel stirred, reaching his arms out as you climbed back into the sheets, skin cooler and clammy. 

"Ya okay, darlin?" He murmured into your hair. 

You settled into the crook of his neck, safe inside his big, strong arms. 

"I will be," you smiled into the silver of his chest hair. 

And he held you tight as you slept. Held you even tighter when he sank his cock inside you almost every night since you’d both come back to the commune; unable to be parted from one another's skin for too long.

It was like you were both making up for lost time. Thirty years or so of pining and neither one of you ready to relinquish that closeness now that you'd got it back. 

You sit on a stool as he pours out some lemonade for you that's sweetly tart and unwraps his sandwich. He smiles down at it, stuffed so full of filling that it’s spilling out the sides sloppily, but it’s his favourite. He offers you half like he always does when you bring him one.

You always shake your head smiling, and insist that he eats it all, but you find he’s left the other half for you regardless, and somewhat obstinately, as he stands to do some more work. 

You sit and watch him work for a bit, as he measures and saws the wood and the others on the site come to collect the planks for the housing frames.

You observe him take charge, giving direction and even getting his hands roughed up as he sands the wood down, talking you through the process as you watch keenly.

Sometimes you bring a book from the library and are content to spend the day under the shade of the canopy breathing in sawdust and losing yourself into a make-believe world, until Joel nudges your cheek with a scruffy kiss and takes you with him back to his house - your new shared home together.

He leads you inside and the moment the door shuts, shuts out the rest of the commune, the rest of the world, you’re all over each other.

His hands are in your hair and yours are round his thick waist. His tongue licks into your mouth and you whine around it, feeling him press into you and crush you against the door. 

“Been thinkin’ ‘bout eating ya out all day,” he husks against your face, skin sweaty and hot. Gritted with sawdust. You flare as his words are your undoing. “All. Fuckin’. Day.”

“So then do it, big guy,” you challenge back and his eyes blaze.

Your stomach simmers as he throws you over his broad shoulder, despite his groan when his back pulls; you’re giggling as he tosses you down on the bed and tugs down your jeans. 

You’re a sanguine vision, naked from the waist down as he parts your thighs and kisses up them gently. You moan as the silk of his scruff feels good against your skin. 

“Look at ya, all spread open for me, darlin’.” Joel croons at you. “So fuckin’ beautiful.”

You watch as he dips his head down and you feel his breath against the wet heat of your cunt already clenching and throbbing in anticipation. 

Joel flattens his tongue against your slit and licks an agonising stripe upwards, slowly; tasting your slick and humming out in sweet, abandoned relief. He gently pulls on your labia, sucking and popping it out of his mouth in wet squelches.  

Your fingers are scratching in his hair and he whines, taking a moment to enjoy the prickles that burst all over his scalp in only that way you can massage, before he dives back in. 

“Fuck, Joel…” You groan; your body warming and your eyes fluttering closed.

He stops licking and sucking, and slips his fingers into you; index and middle right up to the base of his knuckle as he thrusts indomitably with them. With his other hand, he splays your wet lips and flicks his tongue over your clit relentlessly as he fucks you with his fingers, curling inside of you. 

It feels so good, that deep winding and pulling as he furrows deep against your spot and the noises are obscene, coming from you and your pussy in equal measure.

Joel’s hard cock is pressing into the mattress and he can’t help but wind his hips into it with need. 

“Joel, fuck… I’m gonna come,” you gasp; your body stiffening, back arching and starting that tight shake as the fire boils and travels through your veins. 

“Come for me, darlin’,” Joel husks and he licks you harder, curls quicker and watches as you completely fall into oblivion. “Give it all to me.”

You try to shut your legs, crushing his chin and cheeks into your thigh meat, but he keeps you anchored to him, kisses all around your pussy and licks up your stomach until your mouths meet and you taste the sweet tang of yourself.

You reach down to unclasp his belt with his hands pressed either side of your head, you push his jeans down his thighs as far as they’ll go until you can’t reach anymore. 

You take his head in your hands and kiss him deeply, you draw back; your eyes are lost inside of him and you tell him that you love him. Because you really do. You always have.

You never fucking stopped. Not once, in thirty years. 

And Joel takes a beat, right as his cock is lined up with your dripping seam and is about to sink his throbbing head in slowly to that warm, wet crevice that welcomes him inside every time with a clench and a gasp rolling off your lips. 

He looks down at you, mesmerised by the way you look at him. The way you used to look up at him all those years ago. He smiles softly.

“Marry me.” He says without hesitation, without a slur or stutter. 

He watches as your mouth contorts open, the feel of him pushing into you slowly, deliberately for you to feel him. “Want ya to marry me.” 

You nod, eyes swelling with tears. “You want to make me your little woman, Joel?” You chuckle with a groan as he breaks through.  

“Yeah. I do. I love ya, darlin’.” He smiles earnestly, as he pushes his hips forward gently and sinks inside of you with a heady grunt. “So fuckin’ much. Goddamn.” 

“Joel!” You grasp at his shoulders pulling him closer into you as he fills you whole. 

“Say it, say you will.” He pants, his forehead rolling over yours. “Be my wife.” 

“Yes.” You sigh out, elated. “Yes, yes, yes…” Your heart swells, bigger than your chest can contain. Helium and glitter filling you up as he furrows deeper inside of you, makes you scratch at the back of his neck.  

And it’s at that moment right here, and every night and day with you thereafter, that Joel Miller knows that no matter what happens next in this altered and rotten world - whatever it is that comes snapping its sharp jaws towards him relentlessly - he’ll always be able to endure and survive. 

With you by his side, as his lover, his friend. His wife. The absolute love of his life who he found again, after all this time. And he fell back in love with you, all over again in just five days. 

Because five days was all it took, to lead you back to him.

The End??

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Thank you for taking the time to read my story; it really means so much to me. I'd love to know your thoughts, and I'd really appreciate a re-blog so others can enjoy this story too. Thank you so much 🖤

MAIN MASTERLIST

TAGLIST: If you'd like to be removed, please let me know.

Tagging everyone who asked to be tagged & who re-blogged my teaser.

@secretelephanttattoo @morgaussy @darkheartgatita @sp00kymulderr @survivingandenduring @sin-djarin @lilmizmoz @yazsos @ryangoslingstanktop @barbellpedro @givemeth @anavatazes @alwaysmicado @the-blind-assassin-12 @kirsteng42 @missredherring @gasolinerainbowpuddles @millennial-teenybopper @maggiemayhemnj @harriedandharassed @stevie75 @mysterious-moonstruck-musings @chaoticfestninja @reddedmiller @doughmonkey @sonderosa @magpiepillsjunior @chronically-ghosted @pedroswife69 @regalwhovianbrowncoat774 @marisemonteiroo @everythingiwanttoread @jjhayhay20 @nerdieforpedro @perennialdoll247 @casa-boiardi @joeldjarin @sscorpiiio @untamedheart81 @srmacaroni @violinchick @orcasoul @lucyeyelesbarrow @mandrillusphinx @loveisacowboyyy @suzmagine @disassociation-daydreams @anoverwhelmingdin @within-the-depths

#joel miller x reader #pedro pascal x reader #joel miller #pedro pascal #joel miller tlou #joel miller x you #joel miller smut #joel miller fluff #joel miller angst #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x female reader #joel miller fic #the last of us #the last of us fic #pedro pascal characters #five days #five days series #jett's writing

[shadeysprings]

Deal or No Deal.

—Pete Brenner x F!Reader

Summary — You work hard to entice the biggest possible client for your company, but he has his own ideas for you to make him say yes.

Warnings — implied noncon/dubcon, coercion, power imbalance. There may be more that I forgot to mention but please read with caution.

Word Count — 986

A/N — Another impromptu fic because the muse was calling for it. Plus, the babies were wanting and who am I to say no and not deliver. Un-beta and no editing has been done so may be sloppy. But we all love some slop anyway haha!

As always, your feedback is highly appreciated and your reblogs would be amazing. And of course, I hope y'all enjoy! ❤️

The bored look on Pete’s face has you feeling even more nervous since you walked into his company. You never should have agreed to take on this project, you should have just stayed quiet and allowed Janice to take it. But no—you had to be proactive, you had to shove it in her face that you are just as good as a sales rep as her, maybe even better. Yet now, as you continue on with your spiel, the presentation you’ve worked so hard on only looks to be going down the drain. 

“Next slide.” Pete says, making you stutter in surprise but simply doing as you’re told and leaning down on your laptop to tap the key. The audible groan that emits from him has you edge as you do.

“Our product not only surpasses the ones like it but it’s tested and proven to do more.” You say with the remaining enthusiasm left in your system. “If you can see from the studies we’ve conducted, Jan—”

“Yawn.” Pete utters while actually doing so, leaning against the seat and resting his elbow atop the table, his cheek leaning on his fist. “Is there any version of this where we end up fucking?”

That stops you. Your brows furrowed in confusion with the words that just rolled out of his mouth. 

“Excuse me?” You say, disgust and shock curling in your voice.

He chuckles and stands from his seat, exaggeratingly stretching his arms before walking over to you at the end of the long table, fingers grazing over the wooden surface.

“You heard me. That presentation of yours? I’ve seen so many just like it from so many people who, just like you, are desperate for me to say yes.” You hear your heart beat frantically against your chest as he comes closer, your feet taking a step back but no more further as you’re suddenly frozen in place. 

“But just like them, I’m going to say no. You know why?” 

You don’t know if he’s asking a serious question or simply playing with you, trying to intimidate you with the unknown power he holds over your head. 

You don’t respond.

“Let me tell you why. Because it’s boring.” His words are like a vice to your chest. “I’m sure you’ve spent all night perfecting this powerpoint and practicing that speech, but, it just ain’t selling. Nothing about it interests me. Nothing about it makes me want to throw my money at it. And nothing about it makes me say ‘Wow!’”

His large hands trace the edge of your laptop before shutting it close, the room going dim, except for the light coming from the projector as your presentation vanishes.

“Nothing about them draws me in. Except you—” The way he says it makes your skin crawl and you take another step back when you see his eyes run up and down your figure, trapping his tongue between his teeth in the process. “There’s a fire in you. Like you would do anything to prove yourself.” He teases. Stopping just in front of you and framing his hip with his hand, in a way that has you seeing the bulge that has formed in his pants, while his other hand taps against the table, waiting, anticipating your next move. 

“So either, you walk out of this room with nothing—a loser like the rest of those chumps waiting outside to talk to me, or you go back to your boss with a big fat sale you can rub onto the one you took this project from.” 

Your hand visibly shakes with the tension that’s swirling around you. Is this what you want? To allow this man to order you around and do as he pleases for the sake of your career? What face would you show Daniel if he says no? Pete is one of the biggest clients he’s been chasing and you’ve been stupid enough to try and show off. 

Letting out a quivering sigh, you bite your lip and place your notes to the side, looking up at Pete’s face before clenching your fists and looking down at your feet. 

“A thousand pieces.” You argue. If you’re losing your dignity, you may as well get something bigger out of it. 

“You bend over this table and show me that ass and I’ll think about giving you seven hundred.” He bargains, a playful smirk forming on his lips—a sign of his victory and your defeat. 

It’s less yet still more than your initial ask. 

Nodding and once more releasing a breath, you lift up your pencil skirt to reveal your backside and lean against the table just like he’s asked. You bite your tongue to stop the yelp that wants to push from your lips when he slaps your ass and whimper in fear and hatred for this man when he grabs you by the waist and presses his clothed erection against you. 

“Make it worth my while, Sweetheart. My time ain’t cheap.”

“There’s our superstar!” Daniel says in oblivious excitement when you walk back into your department, Janice and the rest of your co-workers looking at you with expectation in their eyes. “Well?” Daniel prompts. “How many did he get?”

“Fifteen hundred with a possible order next month.” You say in resignation and present him the order slip signed by Pete with a note requesting for another meeting next week. Shock fills his eyes as he stares down at the paper before he punches the air in obvious celebration.

“No fucking way!” Janice says in disbelief, yet the others surround you, bidding their congratulations. 

“What did you tell him?” One of your co-workers asks.

“What did you do?” Another.

“She did her fucking best, that’s what.” Daniel says in excitement before hugging you tight. “I never doubted you one second, champ. I’m glad I gave you this account.”

If only you can say the same.

#pete brenner #pete brenner x reader #pete brenner x female reader #dark pete brenner #dark!pete brenner #deal or no deal #pain hustlers #chris evans characters #shadeysprings fics

[starry-eyes-love]

Chapter 5: Woodland Fun

Series Masterlist

Pairing: Joel x F!Reader (18+, Minors DNI), Post-outbreak

Summary | Joel Miller thinks you are a complicated, irritating, and frustrating woman. You're the reason he can't sleep, can't work, and can't do anything without thinking about you. So for once, he gives in to his own urges and lets himself have you in his mind. What he didn't expect was for you to come storming into his personal space yet again. This time though he doesn't think he can stop himself from having you, but he's going to try.

Warnings | 18+, Minors DNI. Smut (a lot), language, male and female masturbation, mutual masturbation with each other, dry humping, fingering (male & female), edging, daddy kink, fluff (if you squint), major argument with angst, yelling, a lot of dirty talk, pet names (little girl, baby, honey, old man, etc.), kissing, body description without being too specific, referencing past trauma, referencing sex with his ex-wife, referencing pregnancy with ex-wife (if you squint), infidelity reference, fertility issues reference (if you squint). Don't know how this happened but this is mostly smut/porn of one version or another (sorry, not sorry). Just know, you have been warned. Enjoy :)

Word Count: 10.3 K (not sorry)

Joel needed to let off some major steam, he needed to give in to this urge in his mind to have you the way he needed to. Just this once, he thought, just this once I get her the way I want her. Then that's it. As he slowly took himself in his hand he felt himself throb painfully. To try to curb his arousal a bit, he gently squeezed the base

Over the next month life seemed to slowly settle into somewhat of a comfortable domestic routine between the three of you.  Ellie and you continued to go through storage areas; collecting clothes, games, and supplies. You also worked on trying to start growing seeds in the house, which proved to be very difficult in the beginning of winter. Periodically you would collect and chop firewood also.  Joel would set and check traps, scout the area, fix the roof and the siding, help chop firewood, and hunt for food.  At night the three of you would sit around the fireplace and talk, play board games that either you or Ellie found, or read in silence.  Joel and you still maintained separate bedrooms when it came to the sleeping arrangements. He said sleeping together right away would just muddy the waters of a relationship.  Basically, everything continued to be the same with Joel as before. The only difference was that once in a while he’d give you a quick peck on the lips when Ellie wasn’t looking.  Nothing ever transpired besides that, and if you were being honest, it was incredibly frustrating.  You understood why Joel didn’t want to have sex right away, but you wanted and needed something more from him.  A hand hold, the ability to cuddle; heck even for him to check you out, something.  You were beginning to believe that Joel Miller was a man of all talk, and very little do.

“Hey dude, like I think that dish is clean,” Ellie said while you were washing the dishes.

“Oh yeah, sorry" you stated. "I was just lost in thought.”

“You were like lost in thought for 10 minutes cleaning that same dish, what gives?" she teased. "Are there problems in the love department again?"

“Love department? Again? Ellie, I-I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you tried to say without giving your voice away.

“Pleeease. I may be younger than you, but I ain’t stupid” she told you.  “I know you have a thing for Joel, and honestly he has a huge thing for you. But ever since the two of you have decided to do this dating shit, which by the way is soooo stupid. You both haven’t been the same, and it’s annoying really.”

“Ellie, I don’t know what you’re…wait. Who said we were dating?” you asked her with a puzzled expression.

“Oh come on, I heard the two of you the night Joel woke up moaning in bed. He woke the whole damn house up with all of that moaning that he was doing. I honestly laid in my bed feeling sorry for him, thinking that he was, you know, thinking about his daughter or somethin’. But then I heard ya and what he told you," Ellie said with a shake to her head.  "Then I finally thought that the two of you were gonna give in to that animal heat phase thing or somethin’, and ya know- maybe fuck it out. But nope, dry as the desert'' Ellie said while laughing out loud shaking her head more.

“Well, it’s not from a lack of trying on my end," you quipped to her in defense.

“Oh I know" she said, tapping your shoulder a few times. "I gave Joel advice about it 2 weeks ago, of how to go about dating cause it’s been awhile for him. Kinda pathetic really, if you ask me.” Ellie said while huffing out a sigh. “Apparently he didn’t listen to a damn thing that I told him,” she states, pinching the bridge of her nose.

“What did you tell him?” you ask nervously.

“That he shouldn’t think about it. That he just needs to talk to you, spend some time with you. Teach you something and then just, I don’t know. Give in to what his body is trying to tell him, and then just ya know, do it” she said.

After a moment of standing there and processing the information you couldn’t help but get frustrated.  You thought that Joel was trying to hide things from Ellie. But in reality he was asking her for advice on how to get to know you, when he could just ask you instead.  Not that a teenager couldn’t give him advice, but goddamnit, you were right here.  You could tell him what you liked, because after all, you knew yourself better than anyone else.

Ellie could sense your frustration and anger rising to the surface. She went to try to defuse the situation fast, because honestly, she didn’t like it when your temper got the better of you.  “Look, y/n. Try doing something that teases him, ya know. Like try coaxing that stubborn man out of his shell by forcing his brain into rut season like a deer or somethin,'” she said softly, trying to encourage you.

“Rut season like a deer? Wow, that’s a new one Ellie, Jesus” you said while shaking your head laughing. 

“Yeah I know, thought of it myself” Ellie commented while giving you her typical big Ellie grin. “But no seriously y/n, do something that turns him on. Or at least gets him to look at you. Go out and chop firewood.  He told me that your ass looks nice doin’ it.”

“He told you my ass looks nice chopping firewood?” you say, somewhat puzzled of why a 50+ year old man would say that to a teenage girl.

“Well no, he didn’t exactly say it directly to me,” Ellie reassured you.  “He was looking at you chopping firewood about 2 weeks ago and said to himself ‘damn it woman, you’re gonna be the death of me with those tight pants on that nice ass of yours,'” Ellie said trying to mimic Joel’s scowl that he does.  

After a moment of silence where you kept fiddling with your hands, Ellie approached you and said, “Y/N, go and chop firewood for Papa Bear. He’s tense and needs something to unwind with. So give that old man a show, just don't give him a heart attack.”  She said laughing while walking away down the hall.

You decided to finish washing the dishes first, while mulling over everything that Ellie had told you.  You knew from previous interactions with Joel that he does love it when you give him a little sass, and when you help him with some of the heavy lifting. Sure, he calls you a smartass while you're doing it, and tells you to stop being so difficult. But nevertheless, you do know that he appreciates your help.  

“Hey, I think I’m gonna go and chop some firewood for awhile" you yell down the hall at Ellie after you finish the dishes. "We’re getting kinda low in here.” As you exit the cabin you grab the axe that was sitting outside and glance over to the area where Joel usually has firewood pieces to chop up.  When you noticed that there weren’t any pieces to chop, you decided to go out into the woods and chop down a tree.  You’ve never chopped down a tree before, and honestly you had no idea what you were doing. But you figured that you’d have to learn sometime.  It can't be that hard, you thought to yourself. 

As you approached the woods you glanced back towards the house to see if you could spot Joel working outside. When you didn’t see him, you figured he must have be checking traps, or hunting for food. After traveling into the woods, you found a tree that you believed you could chop down easily. As you approached the tree you said out loud to yourself, "Ellie, you better be right about him loving my ass as I do this." As you started to pull back the axe you said to yourself "well here goes nothing," and just before you moved to hit the tree you heard a Southern drawl behind you speak up.  

Joel had been out scouting and checking traps all day. He had gotten up early and left the cabin by himself, wanting to have some alone time. This domestic dating life shit was getting on his nerves. Not that he didn't like being with you, that was never the problem. The problem was he desperately wanted to fuck you all the time, and he couldn't do that with Ellie always being around. He also didn't know if you were just looking for a one-time quick lay, or if you truly were serious about a relationship. 

As Joel walked around and checked the traps he kept thinking about you and the interactions the two of you have had. He couldn't stop thinking about how soft you had felt underneath him, or the first time the two of you had sex. He internally hated himself for how desperate he was, and how he didn't give you any proper attention before he fucked you. Joel also knew that you were the reason for his constant worry, his lack of sleep, tense muscles, and a deep ache that he couldn't relieve. He knew he felt something for you, but he didn't know if it was true love, or just infatuation. 

Joel thought that if he was a better man, he would tell you that he was too old for you, that he couldn't be with you, that he'd stop and leave you alone. But Joel wasn't a good man. He pined after you, had a deep urge to be with you, not just physically. He knew he couldn’t stay away from you or stifle his feelings for you much longer. At the end of the day, Joel wanted you. He had a deep urge to have you, to claim you as his, and to ruin you for every goddamn man in the future that thought they could have you. His need to claim you grew stronger with each passing day, and it was getting harder for him to ignore.

Joel noticed that he was almost back to the cabin. He was in a small pine grove near the edge of the woods, close to where the yard would start. Joel knew these woods here like the back of his hand, wanting to know how the land changed just in case trouble came around. He always had a need to keep both you and Ellie safe, so each day he’d hike around and get to know the terrain. Today was quiet and peaceful in the woods, something that was a rarity. Joel, desperately needing to sit down and take a break for himself, wandered over to a pine tree and sat down. As he sat against the pine tree, his thoughts kept drifting to you, and he felt himself slowly harden inside his pants. "I'm old enough to be her damn father, she's too young for me", he said sternly to himself, which did nothing to curb the slow throb that came from his hardening cock. He sat back and closed his eyes as he slowly palmed himself in the front of his jeans. He tried to think of anything else or anyone else besides you. But the truth was, he didn't want anyone else. He only wanted you, laid underneath him and willing for him to do what he wanted. He wondered how you’d taste. Would you be sweet like honey, or a tangy citrus flavor? Would you beg for his cock or beg for him to come inside your tight little pussy, or inside your mouth? 

No. She’s irritating, aggravating, and a pain in my ass, he thought to himself, trying to will away his erection. But even then, when he focused on your sassy attitude and your confidence, it turned him on even more.  He didn't want to admit it, but he loved your demeanor. He loved your challenging behavior, that you weren't afraid to stand up to him. He saw that you had a fire in your soul, and that fire called to him like a siren that had found her next victim. He wasn't stupid, he knew you'd be the death of him. That if he got too close, he'd never be able to escape. 

The more Joel sat there thinking about you: the curve of your ass, the shape of your breasts, and the feel of your mouth against his; the harder he got. All of these thoughts set a fire in his veins and sent a bolt of electricity to his cock. With a sigh he said, "Just this once I’m gonna do this to blow off some steam thinkin’ about her." As Joel took out his aching and throbbing member he saw that he was already leaking precum from his slit. "Fuck" he groaned to himself at how worked up he already was with just thinking about you. He hadn't even touched himself yet. "This ain't gonna last long," he said with a small shake to his head. 

Joel needed to let off some major steam, he needed to give in to this urge in his mind to fuck you the way he needed to. Just this once, he thought, just this once I get her the way I want to fuck her. Then that's it. As he slowly took himself in his hand he felt himself throb painfully. To try to curb his arousal a bit, he gently squeezed the base of his cock. As he did, he heard himself let out a long groan and he felt himself pulse within his hand. After taking another moment to settle himself, he found himself spitting into his hand and slowly sliding it up and down his shaft. He lightly ran his thumb over the swollen tip where he saw precum collecting and as he did he heard himself hiss at the sensation. “Fuck man, you gotta get this under control or you ain't gonna last long,” he said out loud continuing to slowly stroke himself. After a few more pumps he reached down with his other hand and gently cupped and massaged his balls, fantasizing that it was you doing it. 

As he continued to stroke himself, he thought about your mouth and how good it would feel for you to suck him off. Would he be able to deep throat you, and would you love it? He also thought about your hands and how good they would feel stroking his cock. He wondered how many other men you had been with, was he the biggest? Finally, he thought about your tight little hole. God he wanted to lap at it, suck it, and tongue fuck it. He knew from the first time he fucked you how tight you were. But this time he wanted to really take his time to explore you with his tongue, his fingers, and then with his rock hard throbbing cock.

"Fuck", Joel said to himself. "God baby, I need your pussy so badly” he moaned out loud to himself as he stroked himself faster and faster at the thought of you. “Yeah, come on baby girl. Just like that. Come on, baby. Fuck daddy just like that," Joel said while pumping his hand faster and faster. He was imagining fucking up into you the way he needed, with your legs wrapped around him, riding him hard and fast. He was thrusting so hard up into his hand, moaning and grunting to himself at the image of you fucking him that he knew that he was almost there, right on the edge chasing his high, a few more pumps before finally being able to blow his load the way he needed to. “Fuck y/n. Come on, mama. That’s right, fuck me” he said moaning hard as he continued.  “God damn it y/n, I want you so fucking bad right now. Please be a good girl and just fuck my cock, please baby” he panted, wanting you to be in front of him right now so bad, for you to fuck him hard. He wanted to hold on your hips and help you move your hips back and forth as he fucked you deep.  

“Yes, yes, yes” he panted, and just before he finally tipped over the edge he heard a loud “snap” of a tree branch.  Immediately Joel froze, looking through the trees to see who it was as his dick throbbed hard in his hand.  When he didn’t hear it again after a bit, he turned back to slowly give himself a few more pumps, thinking to himself “fuck man, ya gotta make this quick.”  As he started pumping his fist faster, he felt that same heat build up in his spine.  God, he was edging himself too much today, but he didn’t care, he needed release.  He hadn’t touched himself or let himself have an orgasm since the last time he fucked you.  He was desperate for release again. As Joel continued he thought of you again, and he felt himself get right on the edge once again before he heard another “snap” of a branch.  This time when Joel looked through the trees he saw someone walking through the woods, and he instantly froze thinking, who the fuck is that?

He sat there quiet, slowly tucking himself back in his pants and slowly reaching for his rifle as he watched the person walk closer to him. When you came into view and he saw that it was you, he became incredibly frustrated and said "Are ya fucking kidding me? The universe must be run by a goddamn woman, and that bitch must fucking hate me, cause she won't ever let me come." 

Frustrated Joel focused himself on taking a few slow and steady breaths. “Later, I'll finish this later" he told himself under protest. He tried to force himself to calm down the rest of the way before he was going to speak with you, because right now he didn’t think he could stop himself from stripping your clothes off and fucking you the way he was just fantizing about doing moments ago.

As Joel sat there watching you approach, he heard you mumbling to yourself. When you made the comment about Joel liking your ass with chopping firewood, it honestly piqued his interest. You weren't wrong per se, Joel did find your ass very attractive. However, he didn't need an excuse like chopping firewood to admire it. As Joel sat back observing you, he noticed that you were so focused and lost in your own head that you never saw him sitting there on the ground while you walked past. You continued to mumble to yourself about how much of a jackass Joel was, with that comment Joel shook his head thinking smartass. You also complained out loud that you too had needs that he wasn't fulfilling. He heard your comments about how unsatisfied that you were as a woman, and how you wanted him to touch you. You also voiced to yourself how frustrated you were with him that he wasn’t fulfilling all of your needs either. As Joel heard your statements, he quietly whispered to himself, “same thing here darlin', I'm just as fucking frustrated.”

When Joel heard you admit that you had no idea how to chop down a tree, he smiled to himself. He thought it was cute that you admitted out loud to yourself that you didn’t know what the hell you were doing, but you wanted to impress your man, a man named Joel. When Joel heard that, he felt a rush of blood go to his ego, and go someplace else too. So with a smirk on his face, he welcomed the show that he was sure you were about to give him with your ass, especially when they were placed in those tight pants. "Alright, baby. Show daddy what ya got" he whispered.

The longer you mumbled to yourself, the more he saw you move your weight back and forth between your feet. Those tight pants fit you nicely around your ass, and accentuated every curve you had. Joel wasn't a religious man, but today he was thanking God for being able to stay hidden in the shadows to just enjoy the show you were giving him. The longer you bent over and stood up repeatedly, the harder it was for Joel to get control of his ragging hormones and the strong urge to fuck you right here in the woods. He knew he couldn't act on it, but the urge to hold you, bend you over, and claim you as his was strong within him. He quietly adjusted his pants, reminding himself that he didn't have a claim like that over you. He took a few steadying breaths, but when he saw you bring the axe back, he knew you weren't going to hit shit with that stance. So with a smirk on his face he decided to speak and teach you a lesson. If you were going to be the fantasy of his dreams tonight, you might as well do it right, and not hurt yourself.

Right before you swung the axe you heard Joel say, “Darlin', I don’t think that’s the wisest idea there. Ya might wanna rethink what you’re tryin' to do.” You hadn’t known that Joel was sitting in the shadows behind you. You were so stuck in your own head that you never really looked around to view your surroundings to see who or what was present. You didn’t dare admit that to Joel, as you didn't want to start another argument with him. So sarcastically you said out loud, “yeah well, why is that Joel?”

When you didn’t hear him answer you right away, you turned around slowly to see where he was. With your senses heightened, you were trying to determine why he didn’t respond to you right away. All you hoped for was that he hadn't been bitten. When your eyes met his and you saw him sitting relaxed up against a tree, you were deeply surprised. He was looking at you with a shitty smirk on his face, like he was enjoying the show you were about to give him. Truly he looked relaxed and you had no idea why. As you glared at him with frustration at his easy posture, you noticed that he was slowly looking you up and down. When you caught him staring at your ass, you cocked your head and raised one eyebrow saying “I asked you a question Miller, don’t make me ask you again.”

Joel narrowed his eyes at the sass that you just gave him out of your mouth. God that mouth, he thought, what I’d love to do to that filthy mouth.  Joel felt his pants tighten once again at the thought about him fucking your mouth. He hadn’t had a woman’s mouth on him in so long that the mere thought of you doing it made him hard and weeping precum yet again. He knew he had to calm down before he lost all rational thought with you, and force you on your knees to suck him off.

As Joel stood up, he brushed the snow off from his pants, checked his rifle, and then turned away to re-adjust the front of him.  When he turned back around he saw that you were staring at his half hardened bulge still prominent in his jeans. He took in a long inhale, and as he exhaled he said “nothin' good ever comes from that darlin.’”

You were so lost in thought staring at the man in front of you that you never heard what he said. You were too focused on admiring Joel's manly features. Joel Miller was truly an amazing specimen. He had thick biceps that his jacket hugged nicely. He had powerful thighs that you knew could hold a woman up and fuck her properly. His hips and ass were perfect, sculpted by the Gods. He also had beautiful eyes. God you could get lost in those dark chocolate brown eyes. His lips, you already knew, felt amazing against your body. And his tongue, one you hoped would break you into submission again real soon.  

The longer you looked at Joel, the more you felt your body crave the man that was standing here before you. You knew Joel had said something to you, but honestly you were so lost in your own fantasy that you never heard what he said. As you came back down to Earth you shook your head saying “what?” with somewhat of a puzzled expression on your face.

Joel noticed your staring, and he didn’t care because he was doing his own staring too. Your slightly rosey cheeks, mouth slightly parted as you licked your plump soft lips, eyes fixed at the bulge in his pants. If he wanted to he could just walk over there and grab you by the- Fuck man, get it together and stop this shit right now, he thought to himself as he shook his head trying to clear his own mind.  After closing his eyes and taking a few breaths to steady himself he said while clearing his throat, “you’re gonna hurt yourself if ya continue." When you furrowed your brows further Joel added, “your form darlin’, your form is off. If ya hit that tree with that axe the way you’re holding it, you’re gonna hurt your shoulder and your back.”

You looked down at the axe that you were holding somewhat puzzled, and you realized that you were in way over your head. You felt embarrassed that you weren’t holding it right.  Here you were trying to impress the man in front of you, and you didn’t even think to ask Ellie if there was a technique required to do any of this.  You thought you could just grab the axe, swing it, and it’d work. While looking at the axe you felt stupid, and you felt that Ellie had set you up for where you were the butt of a funny joke yet again. Ellie knew how to chop down a tree because Joel showed her.  She also knew that it was a skill you had never learned before. So here you were, trying to make Joel think of you as a sexy, strong, and capable woman who could pull her own weight, when all you were doing was making a fool out of yourself.

You began to shuffle nervously on your feet, looking down and away from Joel when you said “I-I didn’t know. Um- I just thought-”

Joel could tell that you were upset, and turning slightly inward at the realization that you didn’t know what you were doing.  He hated when you turned inward like this because you weren’t completely wrong in what you were doing, just your form was a little messy.  As Joel approached you, he watched you back up slowly looking down. He felt anger rise into the pit of his stomach at your reaction.  He has never hurt you, nor treated you like shit in moments of teaching. He hated the fact that David did this to you. David was a piece of shit who had ruined what could have been an amazing moment with you. If that asshole was still alive today, Joel thought, I’d kill him again.   

Joel had realized that his anger was starting to boil to the surface, and that was something that he didn’t want.  He knew you'd take it that he was mad at you, but that wasn't the case.  He hated the circumstances of people hurting you. So he took a deep breath to calm himself while stepping forward to gently grab the axe from you while saying “Here honey, let me show you.” After he took the axe he showed you how to choke up on it before swinging it. He also showed you how to move your hand as you swung it to chop. When he was finished he gave it back to you and told you to try those hand movements. 

With a nod you grabbed the axe back from him. And as soon as you started to go to swing the axe to chop down the tree again you heard Joel say, “darlin’ are you trying to hurt yourself?”

“What Joel, what?” you bit back frustrated at him as you turned to face him. “I’m doing it just like you showed me, so what the hell is wrong now?”

Joel shook his head at your sass.  He was both turned on by it and completely annoyed and irritated by it. “Listen here little girl” he said with a little bite to his voice. “Don’t bite my goddamn head off when I’m tryin’ to help ya. You wanna know what’s wrong, it’s your stance. Your stance is wrong and I’m tryin’ to show ya how to do it right so you don’t go and hurt yourself.”  He stepped towards you and said “ now turn around and position yourself like you are going to swing the axe.”  When you didn’t move right away, he whispered in your ear, “come on darlin’, what are you afraid of?”

“You,” you answered without even thinking. “I’m afraid you’re going to-”

“Hurt ya? No darlin’ I ain’t gonna hurt ya” he said feeling the anger slowly boil underneath the surface yet again.  “I’m not like that piece of shit David. I’m. I’m just trying to help you, ok?” he said with a sigh. “Honey, I may not always be around and I want you to be able to do this right on your own. Ok? Now come on honey, show me”  he said while tucking a piece of hair behind your ear and nudging you forward.

When you didn’t move he said “Baby, come on. Please show me,” while coaxing you to continue.  You felt your heart race with how close this man was to you. It didn’t help that your head was swimming with what Ellie had said to you earlier.  You were flustered and Joel could sense it as you heard him laugh while saying “come on darlin’, show me.”

After a moment you finally found the courage to begin again.  You started to pull back on the axe once again like he showed you, but this time you felt him grab the axe to stop you from swinging it. Joel softly spoke in your ear saying “your legs are wrong baby, spread ‘em for me.”

You felt heat rise up from your spine and spread across your back and neck. Your also felt your face heat up where you could feel sweat starting to form on your brow. You also started breathing harder, almost panting for him.  You felt your underwear become slick, especially when he got closer and you could feel his chest touching your back softly.  He leaned into you closer, and you felt something hard brush up against your backside as he whispered softly into your ear asking you to spread ‘em. He was so soft and yet so commanding with you, and you loved it. You loved his roughness that he could show. God, you were so turned on by him right now but you didn’t think he meant what you thought he meant, so with a shaky breath you said “Wh-what?” 

Joel could tell how turned on you were by him and it gave him a little bit of an ego boost.  He wasn’t intending on playing this type of game with you, but he realized how his words and actions could have been misinterpreted to mean something more. But the fact that you were so flustered for him he wondered how long it had been since you gave yourself any proper attention. By the way your body responded with a simple phrase, he figured it must have been a long time.  And that was something that he needed to rectify with you soon, but not right now.  

But the longer the moment stretched on, and the more he saw your body respond to him, the more turned on Joel was even getting. God he was still so horny, not able to relieve himself fully so the thought of you getting flustered for him sent him into an animalistic nature. He wasn’t thinking clearly when he leaned in and said with a low growl, “You heard me darlin’. I said spread those fucking legs” And with that Joel put his foot in between your legs and forcibly spread your legs further apart, which caused you to almost lose balance. In an attempt to steady yourself you adjusted your hips and happened to press them hard against the front of Joel and that’s when you felt it, the full outline of his cock in his pants. At that moment instinct took ahold of you and you lightly rolled your hips against his hard bulge. 

You heard him give out a low feral growl again as he grabbed your hips while mimicking the same hip roll back into you. Pretty soon you both were panting as Joel started to dry hump you.  You knew he was turned on, begging for relief. God, he’s so fucking hard, what was he doing out here? You thought to yourself.  You started rubbing your ass harder up and down hard into his crotch, trying to give him some relief while working yourself up too.

“Yeah baby, just like that” you heard Joel say behind you.  He grabbed the axe and threw it to the ground.  He then reached around the front of you and pulled you further back into him. He immediately went to the front of your jeans and opened them up and then plunged his fingers, as soon as he felt how wet you were for him you heard him tsk behind you saying “fuck mama, this all for me?”

When you nodded your head frantically he whispered into your ear in a low growl, “good girl, now show me how you can fuck” as he slammed 2 thick fingers into your hot, wet, and throbbing pussy.  As soon as he did that you let out a low moan and frantically started humping his fingers. You felt Joel bite your neck while saying “come on baby, don’t forget to give daddy some attention.”  He angled your hips back again against his hard bulge and helped you get into a rhythm. You continued to hump his fingers while still giving him some much needed friction. “Come on princess, that’s it. Yeah, fuck me” he said while moaning against you as you both where humping each other.  

When your knees started to give out, he lowered you to the ground on all fours as he yanked down your pants further.  The next thing you knew Joel was humping you hard from behind saying “ya know, I saw two wolves the other day fuck like this and I couldn’t stop thinking about doing this to you” he said humping you hard like you both were animal’s in heat. 

“God, put your cock in Joel, fuck” you said rubbing harder against his ass.

“No, only good girls get daddy’s cock, you robbed me of another orgasm sweetheart.  I was a few more pumps from blowing my sweet fucking load before you interrupted me yet again” he said biting hard on the back of your neck. “I haven’t been able to fucking come since I fucked you in that sleeping bag” he admitted finding that the angle wasn’t giving him enough friction that he wanted.  So he quickly grabbed you and yanked your pants the rest of the way off while sitting back down against the tree.  “Well go on, if you wanna fuck so bad, go ahead. Fuck me” he said with blown out pupils.

You stilled and looked at him and said, “huh Joel, baby you need to-”

“Shut up and just do it,” he growled moving your hips back and forth over his hard bulge that was still prominent and fully clothed in his pants.  After the two of you were grinding hard back and forth, you both needed more friction. Joel quickly unbuckled his belt and freed his cock. You watched him slowly start to stroke himself while looking at you in your eyes saying, “fuck baby, what the hell are ya doing t’me? I’m so fucking horny for you that I ain’t thinkin’ clearly anymore baby.”

You watched as Joel slowly stroked his throbbing cock. You knew Joel was trying to figure out how he could stop what was happening, but knowing that he was too worked up to put an end to this.  It looked like it hurt him bad at how much he throbbed and how much precum was leaking from him. You didn’t want an argument so you scooted down his legs and then leaned back and spread your legs to him while slowly running a finger through your wet slick folds says “Joel, I’m just as fucking worked up. And I know you ain’t wanting to fuck, I’d gladly do it though if you wanted.”

When you saw Joel slowly shake his head no while still continuing to slowly stroke himself you said “yeah I didn’t think so.”

You found yourself slowly sticking a finger in your dripping pussy and moaning at the sensation as your eyes rolled back in your head. God, it had been so long since you had a proper orgasm.  When you opened your eyes again you saw Joel looking at you like he was a wolf wanting to devour his meal that was in front of him.  This gave you a boost of self esteem so you said “Joel, I’m so fucking horny, so how about we both do this a bit.  You touch yourself, and I touch myself, and we both give in to the orgasm that we both know we need.”

“I can’t darlin’, you ain’t gonna play fair if we do any more” he said while stilling his hand and closing his eyes.

“Hey, look at me,” you said gently while touching his cheek.  When he opened his eyes you continued saying “I promise we’ll just do this. No touching for either of us to the other person or we both know how it ends. I know you’re not ready for that yet. But Joel, baby, I fucking need to cum so bad right now that it hurts, so please touch yourself.”  After a few more strokes of yourself you slip your slick coated finger into his mouth so he can taste how worked up you were. 

Joel moaned when he tasted how good you were. He wanted to lap at you right now but if he did, he knew he’d forget all self restraint and fuck you hard. “Your shit to my self control love, ya know that? And ya don’t fucking play fair” Joel said after he pulled your finger out of his mouth with a pop. 

“Who said about playing fair Joel? Here I have my boyfriend, supposedly, who doesn’t want to ever do anything sexually.  First relationship I’ve ever had where he’s someone who’s all talk and no do” you say slowly teasing your clit at your words.

“Watch your mouth there smartass, or you may not like what you’ll get baby” Joel says as a warning.

“Fuck your self control Joel, and your good fucking attitude” you say while sinking 2 fingers knuckle deep within you. “I just want to fuck my boyfriend’s cock, is that so bad?” you say while moaning and pumping your fingers in and out of your tight dripping hole.

Joel watched you give yourself over to pleasure and he couldn’t help himself, he had to indulge in his own pleasure.  So he spit in his hand and then slowly started stroking himself in time with your fingers. God this is fucking hot, he thought to himself.  “Fuck baby, take my cock good like that. And for the record, your boyfriend does wanna fuck you bad” he said as he continued to stroke himself at the speed of your fingers.

When you opened your eyes you noticed Joel was matching you thrust for thrust.  To tease him a little bit you decided to slow down the strokes of your fingers while saying, “come on daddy, you know you can do better than that.”

“Fuck woman, don’t tease,” he growled at you while slowing his strokes down to match you.

“Why Joel, doesn’t it feel good?” you say, dragging out your pleasure just a little longer.

“Fuuuck” he groaned while slamming his head back against the tree, watching you slowly fuck yourself with your fingers as Joel kept edging himself in time with you.  

After a few more slow pumps of your fingers, you felt that familiar feeling of your walls fluttering around yourself.  You knew you were not going to last for very much longer. So you sped up your fingers to start to fuck yourself fast, panting and moaning for Joel.  You looked over and saw Joel panting just as hard, cursing under his breath, fucking himself hard and fast up into his hand.

“Joel baby, I want you” you say panting.

“I know baby, I know. Don’t stop Angel, fuck, don’t stop.” he said in a strained voice.

“Pleeease Joel, I need more” you say begging him, for what you didn’t know.

“I know Angel, I know. But we can’t, we can’t, fuuck” he says watching you desperately chase your high, not quite getting deep enough with your fingers that he knows that you need.  He watched you get frustrated, begging for him to help you, and him telling you no.  Finally after a bit Joel saw you slow down your fingers, pulling them out, knowing that you never came. It’s in that moment he sees your true frustration, you haven’t been able to come since he had sex with you last, not that you hadn’t wanted to, but you couldn’t.  God Joel felt like a complete asshole at this moment.

“Baby, what’s the matter?” he said as he watched you get up and put your pants back on. “Come on honey, don’t do this” he said pleading with you to not shut down.

As soon as you opened your mouth you pulled away saying “I can’t. We-we need to focus.” 

“Why? Why did you stop” he asked you as he also quickly stood up putting himself back together and zipping himself up. 

As you turned around to face him you said, “Joel, I just- I don’t know- tell me what I have to do to-”

It was then that he realized where you were going and all Joel could say shaking his head was “Don’t, don’t go there.”

“Don’t go there, seriously Joel?” you said with a bite to your voice. “No. No Joel, I want to go there. I want to know why. Why is it everytime we get alone and stuff like this happens you say no? Fuck Joel, I can feel you’re turned on, damnit I can see it still right now. We were- we-” you say while trying to put to words what the two of you were doing, because it felt like it was more than just mutual masterbation. Frustrated you said, “fuck Joel, I’m turned on. So why do you resist it, why can’t you just give in and-”

“And fuck you?” he said sarcastically. 

“Yes Joel, why? Why can’t you fuck me?” you snapped.

“You don’t know what you’re askin’ for darlin,’” he said while shaking his head and looking off into the distance.

You were so frustrated with this man. For the lack of any intimacy, for the lack of communication with you, and for the lack of honesty.  You knew he side-stepped conversations that meant something to him, or brought up strong emotions to the surface. He was a big old broody man, a man that you truly loved, but damnit, you didn’t care in this moment if he was comfortable or not. Everytime you have listened and dropped the topic of discussion, no resolution ever came later on. He’d forget it and move on, treating you as if the topic never got brought up. But not today, today you weren’t going to let him get off so easily. This man in front of you made you question why the hell you were even here in the first place.  For your own sanity, you needed to know. You had enough of the games the two of you played, this time you were going to get to the heart of this and find a solution no matter what the solution was. If not, then you were going to leave permanently.  

So with a deep breath, and nerves shaking you all over, you said “You know, for someone who says he cares and wants me as his girlfriend, you do have a funny way of showing affection. No wonder why Sarah’s mom and Tess-”

“Don’t. Don’t you fucking finish that goddamn sentence little girl, I’m warning you. Don’t.” Joel sneered at you, anger boiling fast to the surface. Who the hell gave you the right to even speak about his past relationships, something you knew nothing about, he thought to himself. 

“Why Joel, cause it’s the truth?” you say getting more and more angry.  “Why could you fuck them and not me?” you snap feeling the tightening in your throat coming on. You knew you were hitting his emotional button with anger, but he was hitting yours where you didn’t feel worthy of love.  Something you didn’t want to admit to him or even to yourself.

“If ya recall darlin,’” he said with a bite to his voice, “I did fuck you.” 

“Yeah one time Joel, one time. And I get it why you didn’t want to after that, that you wanted to date me or whatever. But shit Joel, we don’t kiss, we don’t hug, we don’t-”

“What the fuck were we just doing then y/n, huh? Cause it looked to me that we were definitely doing something” Joel snapped back.

“Yeah, until you would have came and then it would have been done, nevermind that I needed more” you say throwing your arms up in the air. “Jesus Christ Joel, what the fuck do I gotta do to get you to give a shit about me?” you snap back feeling the sting starting to burn hot in the back of your throat.

“I do care. I do give a shit y/n. Fuck, why do you think I’m even out here with you?” he snapped. He didn’t want to have this conversation, the one where he knew you backed him into the corner on having. The one where he had to admit his fault to you, the reason why he has held back for all of these years, even before the outbreak with other women. He knew he needed to turn and walk away before it went any further, but he couldn’t. He wanted to, but he could see you were breaking in front of him. You had an idea that he didn’t care and that was not the reason for this problem.  So he stayed and gave into your and his frustration, and stood there having the one argument with you that he never wanted to have. 

You were so lost in your own anger and frustration that you never saw Joel wince at your outburst, or look at you pleading with his eyes to stop, asking you not to push him any further.  You were so lost in your own emotions that nothing registered in your brain at what you were seeing before you.  You shouted at him saying, “I don’t know Joel, why are you out here? You haven’t hardly been alone with me for 5 seconds for the past month and-”

“For good fucking reason, y/n. I haven’t been alone with you for a good fucking reason. Jesus” he said throwing his hands up in the air out of frustration.

“Then tell me,” you yelled back with tears stinging your eyes and starting to slide down your cheeks. “Tell me why I’m not good enough, Joel. Why did you fucking save my life when you clearly didn’t want to. Why didn’t you just let Dave kill me, when you clearly don’t care. Tell me Joel, why? Why am I in love with a man that doesn’t fucking love me back? What do I have to do to get you to fucking se-see me?” you say as the sob escapes your lips at the admittance of your feelings for the one man standing before you.

It was in that moment that Joel hated himself. He knew you were struggling with those emotions, he knew you loved him but fuck, this was not how he wanted you to say it to him. He knew he wasn’t the guy that liked to communicate his feelings.  Tommy always said while growing up that Joel’s biggest fault was his lack of communicating how he felt. He knew that was the reason why Sarah’s mom did what she did and left, and of why Tess never fully gave herself to him. He hated talking about his emotions and feelings, but he knew that you needed to hear the reason why, because he didn’t want to lose the one person he fucking loved more than anything in this world right now, and that person was you.  Ellie was the other person he loved so much, but he loved her like his own daughter. Where he loved you like his wife, his soulmate. 

When he didn’t respond right away you shook your head and said “maybe I should just-”

“No,” Joel said interrupting you. “Please baby, don’t leave” he said looking up at you with bloodshot eyes. You saw how tears were forming in his eyes and you didn’t understand why. Why would a man who was so closed off with you, who always hated things you did really care if you stuck around. 

“Why Joel, why?” you asked feeling broken. “Please.”  

When he didn’t respond again and looked away, you decided to go pack up a few things to leave. Ellie was wrong, you thought to yourself, I was wrong, he never wanted me. You didn't want to chop down a tree anymore. You just wanted to leave, to stop this pain and to just, I don't know, figure your own life out alone. You turned and had only taken about 4 steps away when you heard Joel speak. 

“I used to do contracting work before the outbreak, I owned a business called Miller Contracting” he said.  You paused and looked over at him and waited. Honestly, you were a little baffled as to why he’d bring that up now. “That sounds pretty cool Joel, you must have done a good job” is all that you could say. 

Joel just shook his head and snorted at your comment.  After a moment he continued saying “Sarah was about 2 years old at the time. Teesh, my wife, short for Theresa, was a stay-at-home mom at the time. We had only known each other, dated for about 5 months before she got pregnant with Sarah. She was young, barely 19 when she got pregnant with Sarah and I, being in my early 20s fucking knew better. One night after a date she was so hot, wanting me so bad. It was raining outside and we were on our way back from the movies.  We had gotten into a horrible fight on our way back and she started to cry. She said that I didn’t love her. But fuck, if that woman really knew how I felt about her we wouldn’t have gotten into that argument.”

“Anyways,” Joel said while switching sides with his rifle and slowly walking up to you. “She said I didn’t care and the next thing I knew we were parked on the side of the road and she was on my lap and- well, let’s just say that Sarah was created in my truck that night. I didn’t have anything for protection and she pleaded with me to not pull out. I was so swept up in the moment that I didn’t think that she may have been ovulating” he said with a smirk.

After a moment of silence you said “Joel, I’m sorry that happened, but what does that have to do with-”

“Just give me a minute here baby, please” Joel said while wiping a tear off his face. Finally after a few moments of Joel lost in thought you heard him continue.  “Sarah was born 9 months later and Teesh and I were married when she was 5 months pregnant. Teesh and I didn’t get along much, but we put a great effort in. Well when Sarah was about a year old I started my own business, Miller Contracting, and Teesh was my biggest supporter at the time, or so I thought. I busted my ass for my family. We moved out of this shitty 1 bedroom apartment into a house that I had built for her and Sarah. Sarah was about 2 years old and Teesh said she wanted another baby. After a few discussions I had agreed and we tried, fuck baby we tried so goddamn hard to do it. But when you’re working 60 hours a week, hardly home in the summer, it makes baby making a little harder.”

“Well, one day I got done with work a little early, about 2 pm, and wanted to go home to surprise Teesh. Sarah was over at the babysitters house cause Teesh needed a break that day. I went and bought her some flowers, stopped and got her favorite cheesecake from the best bakery, and was gonna go home and show my wife that her man needed her.  I bought a card and wrote in the card ‘baby, I love you and need you, J’. And for me, that was a lot for sharing my emotions.”

“When I walked into the house I heard some moaning coming from the bedroom. I thought my wife was giving herself some much needed attention. God, I was so turned on by it, wanted to watch her touch herself and then help her finish. So I walked up the stairs to our bedroom and then froze with what I saw.”

You felt your heart race fast in your chest when you looked at Joel in the face. You saw a man that looked broken in this second, shattered. You watched him taking a few shaky breaths to calm himself. Finally after a moment you said softly “Joel, what did you see?”

With a shake of his head, Joel looked you straight in the eyes and said, “I saw my wife fucking my best friend. The man who was like a brother to me. He was balls deep in my wife, fucking her with no protection and she was begging him to come inside her. And she was fucking ovulating.”

“Oh my God Joel, I’m so-”

“Don’t. Let me finish” he said clearing his throat and swiping another tear away from his cheek. Finally after a few moments he said while looking off in the distance, “She said the reason why she did it was because I didn’t care about her, that she felt that I never loved her, yet I did.” Joel looked back at you and said “darlin’ I struggle communicating my feelings, as you can tell. But don’t ever think for a second baby that I don’t care about you, cause I do. I’m just scared. I’m scared of losing the people that matter the most to me. I’ve lost everyone so far that I’ve cared about deeply, and I don’t want to lose you. I don’t make love to you baby, not cause I don’t want to. Fuck woman, I want you more than you god damn know. I just. I can’t risk sentencing you to death or our baby to death, because I fucking knocked ya up out here.”

Joel gently grabbed your face with both hands, and with looking into your beautiful eyes he said “I see you mama. I see you so god damn much in front of me and I- I, fuck.”  You watch a tear slip down his cheek, while shaking his head he continues saying, “I see you honey, ok. And I care about you, so damn much,” and with that he leans in and puts the softest kiss to your lips.

You allow yourself to melt into the kiss, and into him.  You don’t ask for more than what he is giving you, because this was Joel showing you that he cared. After a moment he deepens that kiss and brings you closer to him.  He skims your lips with his tongue, asking gently for access to your mouth, and you grant it to him with no resistance.  He doesn’t wrestle you with his tongue, but slowly moves it in your mouth, where both of your tongues are doing a slow dance exploring each other.  This isn’t a kiss that says ‘I want to fuck you.’  This is a kiss that says ‘I love you.’  Even though he hasn’t said it to you, you can feel it in this moment with how he is kissing you, as it is so intimate.  And you communicate the same thing to him with your slow tender kiss back.

When Joel had finished exploring your mouth, he gently pulled back and nipped your chin and jaw.  He then pulls you close into his arms and wraps his arms tenderly around you saying, “I care about you kiddo, don’t ever think differently, ok? And I promise baby, I’ll work on the affection part. But know that I care about ya, alright. I fucking care and want you more than you’ll ever know.” He gently starts swaying you side to side in his arms, caressing the back of your head and kissing you periodically on the top of your head.

“Ok, old man,” you say, and you hear him chuckle above you. “But ya gotta give me more than just the cold shoulder Joel. If you want me to believe you, and that you do care, you gotta give me more than just telling me these things baby. You gotta show me, and don’t worry, we’ll go at a pace that is comfortable for both of us, ok?” 

“Ok mama, ok.” he says and gives you the softest kiss on your lips again.  After pulling all the way back he picks up the axe that had dropped and hands it to you while saying, “ok smartass now swing that fucking axe and let me see that nice ass of yours." As you turn around he playfully slaps your ass.

You burst out laughing and say “ok Papa Bear, you better go sit down or you’re gonna have a heart attack if ya don’t watch it.”  And with that you glance back over your shoulder at him before you swing the axe towards the tree.  As you line up, you glance back to see if your form is ok. He nods once at you in a silent encouragement to keep going and you hit the tree.  As soon as the axe hit the tree you heard him say “good job baby, now do it again.” And so you follow his instructions.  Pretty soon the tree was chopped all the way down by you.  He had given you instructions and feedback along the way, encouraging you to keep going.  He had offered you to let him finish chopping the tree down for you when you got tired, which you promptly told him if he moved one muscle to grab that axe you were going to swing it at his head.  He laughed at you holding his arms up in surrender, and told you to continue then.  

Once the tree was chopped down he grabbed the axe from you and told you to go sit down to rest. He showed you how to check the tree for closer damage and how to chop some of the unhealthy branches off first. When you offered to drag the tree back to the cabin he said to you “nah baby, I got it” and then you followed him back watching him flex his muscles for you. Once you were back you immediately started sectioning off the tree into easier sections for firewood. Joel helped you chop wood, quietly glancing over at you as you both worked.  Once you saw him glance at your ass and stare at the curve of it.  You smiled and said “eyes up here cowboy” and pointed to your face.  He quickly cleared his throat and said “was looking behind you, not at ya,” as he adjusted his jacket with a red face from embarrassment that you caught him looking.  

You thought Joel being embarrassed looked cute, so you walked up to him and said with a smile “ya I know, my behind is sexy isn’t it?” Joel never answered you, but looked at you with intense eyes as he tightened his jaw.  When you walked away you heard him say under his breath “yeah baby it fucking is” and then you watched him re-adjust the front of his pants yet again.  Ellie was right, you thought to yourself, points go to the cocky teenager for being right.  You make a mental note that next time you talk with Ellie about something like this, you tell her that she was in fact right.  Papa Bear does love it when you go out to chop firewood.  You also make a mental note that you will definitely be making a trip out to the pine trees with Joel yet again. 

-End of Chapter 5-

A/N: Wow, this is the filthiest thing I have written so far. Once again there will be other chapters with these two. I already have a few written, had to split up what I originally wrote for this chapter into 3 separate chapters. Things eventually will heat up with these two and they eventually will fully give in. If you want to be added to the taglist let me know in the comments (tags only added to completed chapters or upcoming one-shots, not teasers).

Taglist: @punkshort @shotgun-shelby @strawbunnyx @orcasoul @pedritoferg @chiogarza @jesfreedark @untamedheart81 @rainbow12346 @nandan11 @swiftpascal @eliza-8 @joeldjarin @vickie5446 @nastiasnow

#joel miller #joel and reader #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller fic #joel miller masterlist #pedro pascal #joel miller smut #the last of us #joel the last of us #ellie the last of us #ellie tlou #ellie x reader #the last of us hbo #tlou hbo #joel x reader #joel x f!reader #joel x female reader #my journey to you #joel miller x you #joel miller x reader #joel miller x female reader #joel miller fluff #tlou fic #joel tlou

[mykneeshurt]

Daddy

Arthur Morgan x F!reader

Warnings - 18+, minors DNI, explicit smut

Not overly proof read because I cba x

——

Sitting in your chair by the fire you concentrated on your needle work. Your father was away for the night on business, he reared and sold thoroughbred horses. In turn you looked after the house, helped to clean the stables and helped to break in the horses when they were old enough.

While you loved the horses you hated your father. He was mean, abusive and cruel. Your mother died when you were young and you were an only child, it felt like a punishment for something you’d done in your past life.

As you focused on a particular stitch there was a knock at the door. Not expecting anyone you pulled out the shotgun from a chest, it felt heavy, the cold trigger kissed the warm skin of your fingers.

Opening the door you kept it hidden at your side, peeking through the crack you saw a tall broad man. A cigarette hung from his lips as he rested his hands on his belt. ‘Can I help you?’ You asked meekly, trying to portray the helpless damsel.

‘You got the money?’ He asked, inhaling the cigarette, the orange glow only slightly illuminating his face.

‘Money? You’ll have to speak to my daddy. Ain’t no money here sir.’ Flashing your doe like eyes up at the man praying he’d leave you alone. ‘Your daddy?’ He asked, a sinister smirk spreading across his lips. ‘Yeah. He don’t take too kindly to strangers knocking on the door this time of night.’ Your voice more stern and forceful than before. ‘So I suggest you leave.’

He moved closer to the door leaning on the frame as he rested his hand on him gun holster. ‘Your daddy ain’t here. Now. You got the money?’ He growled.

Shit.

The German man you’d borrowed money off in town, you thought you’d have more time. You only needed it to top up money you’d been saving to leave your fathers home. Chewing on your jaw you tried to push the door shut, but he was quicker than you.

Bursting through the door his body slammed into yours causing you to drop the gun. It fell to the floor with an almighty clatter, noticing the gun he stifled a chuckle. He pushed you up against the wall, boxing you in between his huge arms. ‘What’s a pretty lil thing like you doing with a gun like that?’

‘Protection.’ You snapped, he was stood so close to you, he smelt of sage and gunpowder. ‘Protection from what?’ He asked as he took a step closer to your body, so close you were almost touching. The breath in your chest seized, your thighs clenched as you got lost in his musk.

‘From people like you’ you sneered, desperately trying to prove you weren’t intimidated by him. Smirking from under the brim of his hat he grasped your chin between his thumb and forefinger, lifting your gaze to his. ‘Now that ain’t very nice sweetheart’ he drawled ‘I’m thinkin’ you don’t have the money do you?’

You squirmed under his grip, he was beautiful and you berated yourself for thinking so. Eyes as blue as the ocean with flecks of green, sandy blonde hair with stubble to match. A sharp jaw line, broad stature with a small waist and he was tall. So tall.

With his grasp still firm on your chin you finally managed to find an answer, ‘no.’

‘I didn’t think so. Mr Strauss wants his money.’ He lowered his head to your neck, his breath fanning ever to gently over it ‘how do you propose we fix this hm?’ You practically felt your pupils blow wide, your cunt clenched in your bloomers as you swallowed hard. Fucking an outlaw would certainly be payback for how your father treated you. Even more so if you fucked him in his bed.

Resting your hand on his wrist you whispered ‘follow me.’

Leading the outlaw up the creaky wooden stairs he held your hand, it was gentle. You entered your fathers room and instantly he clocked it, ‘this ain’t your room is it?’ Throwing him a devilish grin you shook your head as you pulled him into you by his belt buckle. His body collided with yours, you bit your lip as you looked up at him. Placing your arms around his neck you pulled him into a kiss. His lips were so soft, he snaked his hand to the back of your head, twisting his hand in your hair.

Moaning into his mouth you swiped your tongue along his lip, begging for entry. Allowing you this he deepened the kiss as he walked you backwards towards the bed. Once the backs of your knees hit the bed he guided you to sit down, as you did he helped you onto your back, never once breaking the kiss. Slowly he crawled on top of you as he slid his knee between your thighs, pulling a moan from the back of your throat.

His knee grazed your clit as he settled between them, sighing into you. As you pulled back you nipped his lip smiling as you did so. ‘Well darlin, I wasn’t expecting this when I knocked on your door this evenin’ he said with a crooked smirk. ‘Mmm, I’m full of surprises’ you purred while kissing his neck.

Pulling him back in, your lips met, the kiss was deeper and sloppier this time. Wet. Tongues tangled around each other, lips moved in tandem, breath intertwined as you swallowed each others moans. Slowly he trailed his hand down your torso, grabbing your breast he massaged it gently. You sighed softly into him causing him to break the kiss. ‘You want this?’ He asked, concern suddenly evident in his eyes.

Eyebrows raised you smiled ‘oh so now you’re a gentleman. Didn’t ask permission to burst into my house did you?’ Dropping his head he let out a hearty laugh before moving a stray piece of hair from your face. ‘Oh darlin. I always ask permission before makin a lady scream my name.’ Your jaw dropped as a delighted giggle burst from you.

Pushing your hip up you forced him onto his back so you were straddling his hips. Tilting your chin you looked down at him whilst drumming your fingers on his broad chest. ‘Oh you’re gonna make me scream your name huh?’ He nodded. ‘Well Mr outlaw, you’re gonna have to tell me it first.’ Gripping your hips he began to move you, forcing you to grind your hips on his hard cock. ‘Arthur.’

‘You best take these close off then Arthur’ you grinned. He sat up and slowly removed each layer of your clothing delicately, his hands were soft despite the calluses which littered them. His fingertips kissed each part of your skin as he mapped it beneath him. His arms were defined, strong and muscular.

You made fast work of his buttons, peeling his shirt off him as you made your way down to his trousers. Soon enough you were both naked, led next to one another, gazing into each others eyes. ‘Beautiful’ he sighed. Feeling a sudden heat in your cheeks you buried your head into his neck, but he pushed you back ‘naw, I wanna see that smile.’

‘Mmm Arthur, you gonna keep kissin my ass or you gonna fuck me?’ Your confidence caught him off guard, trailing his fingers down your back he pulled your leg over his hip. He then trailed it along your slit ‘oh darlin, you’re so wet. That all for me?’ You hummed at his touch, it had been so long since a man had touched you. ‘Don’t tease me Arthur … please.’

With that he plunged a finger into you, stretching your pussy open with a smooth motion. Biting your lip you nodded as you gripped into his shoulder, digging your nails in. As he moved and worked you open he slid in another, coughing you to his between clenched teeth. ‘You ok sweetheart?’

You nodded furiously ‘yes … yes … shhh don’t stop.’

He moved his fingers inside you, rubbing your spot exactly the way you needed. Your face contorted with each movement, with each thrust of his fingers. You whined and moaned into him, your chest heaved with each breath. Then suddenly he removed them, causing you to groan in anger. ‘Fuck!’ You yelled, not knowing whether to cry or laugh.

Instead he started kissing your neck, nipping your collarbone, before moving down to your abdomen. He spread your thighs and kissed the nest of hair that decorated your pussy. His breath tickled. His tongue however felt heavenly, with small languid licks he worked his way over your clit. His blue eyes peeked up at you as he worked his jaw, you felt him smile against you. No one had ever done this to you before.

You rolled your hips, gripping the bed sheets with one hand, the other buried in his sandy blonde hair. He held you down with one arm, inhaling your scent, devouring your moans as you writhed beneath him. You were getting close. So very close.

And he knew it.

‘That’s it pretty girl, lemme hear you. Sound so good’ he drawled, his voice thick and husky. ‘Feels so good’ you whined. With one final lick he moved himself back on top of you, lowering his lips to yours. You could taste yourself as he kissed you. Just as he slipped his tongue into your mouth he pushed his cock into you. Both gasping as he did. You felt so full. So so full.

The stretch was agonisingly beautiful, he slowly worked his cock into you. Grazing that sweet spot. He started slow at first, allowing you to get used to him. When you relaxed into him he upped his pace, whispering sweet praises in your ear. His pubic bone hit your clit with every thrust, pushing you closer and closer to the edge.

Lifting your legs he placed them on his shoulders, kissing and caressing your calf muscles, your ankles. This new position allowed him to go deeper, the tip of his cock kissing your cervix, a dull but not painful feeling. Sweat began to gather on your bodies, gasps and moans mingling in the dull light of the fire. ‘Play with it darlin’ he gasped at he looked towards your glistening pussy.

Dropping a hand you rubbed your sensitive bundle of nerves. Arthur’s eyes widened, he chewed his jaw as he watched. You felt yourself begin to tighten. So did he. ‘That’s it, just like that sweetheart, lemme feel yah.’ Screwing your eyes shut, back arched, toes pointed you came, pleasure rushed through your soul as you rode your high. ‘Oh fuck Arthur!’

‘Where you want it?’ He asked breathlessly, strands of sweat soaked hair framing his face. ‘Fuck, anywhere, I don’t care’ you panted. With that he pulled out, letting his cum decorate your soft skin, it felt warm as it hit your breasts, abdomen, chest. Using a finger you gathered some before licking it off, a wicked grin on your lips.

‘Oh darlin.’ He smirked ‘I ain’t ever lettin you go.’

#rdr2 arthur #rdr arthur #arthur morgan x female reader #arthur morgan rdr2 #red dead redemption arthur #arthur morgan x reader #arthurmorgan #arthur morgan smut #arthur morgan #arthur morgan x you #rdr 2 #red dead smut #red dead redemption x reader #red dead redemption smut

[loveandmurders]

Not sure if this is where requests go, don't do it often, but would love a part 2 for Ya ain't love me, Bo needs some lovin 💗

No rush or anything,just thought I'd ask

Hello love, thank you so much for having requested another part for this <3 In the end I wrote quite a bit and there will be 4 parts in total.

Hope you'll enjoy &lt;3

You can find part 1 here.

YA AIN'T LOVE ME YET - PART II (female reader x Bo Sinclair)

Warnings: no proof reading, obsessive!Bo, mentions of murders and violence, non consensual relationship (no sexual abuse), angst.

It was the first time in weeks you had been able to sleep without being tied up and you enjoyed freely moving around in the bed, even if Bo’s arm stayed wrapped around you the whole time. The man had fallen asleep with a little smile on his face. He was happy you were finally playing into his game and you were finally giving him a chance. He knew that if he was good enough you would forget about your dead ex boyfriend and about running away from him. He was certain everything was going to be alright from now on. It had to be or he would fully lose it.

At the same time, he knew he would need to agree on some rules with you so he could trust you. He wasn’t naïve enough to believe you weren’t going to try and escape at the first occasion. And it would kill him. He wasn’t certain he deserved love and happiness, because of the monster he truly was, but he still needed it more than anything. 

He snuggled against you, his face into the crook of your neck. Your scent was appeasing him so much. He woke up before you and watched you in his arms. You almost looked at peace too, and it was only making him hope even more. He thought how beautiful you were, such an angel in his embrace, and he started to play with your hair. He could have stayed like that forever. Actually, if you had wanted, he would have happily agreed to stay in bed all day with you. He couldn’t stop himself from quietly kissing your face. He was trying his best to be soft and tender. He wanted to prove to you that he wasn’t just a broken and angry man. He would do anything you would want from him, as long as you didn’t try to run away from him. You didn’t know you were his, and you didn’t realise it yet, but he was yours as well. It was scaring him a little, but there was nothing he could do to fight off the infatuation he felt for you.

You started to stir up, and for a moment, it felt like you were back in your previous life with your previous boyfriend. But you didn’t recognise his scent nor his touch. You fully remembered what was happening when you heard Bo’s voice whispering a gentle “goo’mornin’” against your cheek.

You hated his touch so much, but you knew you needed to be smart, so you didn’t push him away. And when he tilted your head for a kiss, you didn’t jerk away. You even answered the kiss back, which made him smile against your lips. He seemed rested and relaxed, like you had never seen him before. And you hated it too. You didn’t want to give him what he wanted, but it was your only chance to escape. You needed him to fully let his guards down. He stroked your cheek and you kissed his palm, like you used to do with the man you loved. It was easy to reproduce those gestures you knew by heart; it was simply making you want to throw up. Bo’s smile widened and his eyes lit up.

“Cuddly in the mornin’, ain’t we?” he commented and his words stabbed you in the chest because your now dead boyfriend used to call you a “cuddly kitten” when you were loving on him in the morning. You simply shrugged. “We need to agree on some rules” Bo continued as he settled on his back and brought you against his chest.

“What rules?” you asked with a raised eyebrow as you moved your hand on his torso

“Simple ones. One: for the moment, ya ain’t leavin’ the house, except if ya’re with me. Two: ya ain’t tryin’ to get people to “save” ya and ya ain’t tryin’ to run away. Three: ya start talkin’ to me.” he said.

“I start talking to you? What about?” you hummed, confused by the last rule.

“‘Bout what ya wanna from me to be a good boyfriend to ya” he explained without looking at you. It seemed it was embarrassing him to be so straightforward about his own desires and needs, but he wanted things to work out. He was certain you were the love of his life, so he couldn’t screw this up. You wanted to tell him that a “good boyfriend” wouldn’t kill people, but you knew he wouldn’t like those words so you stayed silent instead, which made him sighed. You looked up at him and he cupped your face in one hand. “It starts now” he hummed with a little frown. It was obvious Bo didn’t like being disobeyed, even by you, so you nodded.

“What am I allowed to do in the house?” you asked

“Anythin’ ya wanna. Just don’t go into the basement. It’s Vinny’s place, ya know it. Otherwise, ya can even redecorate the whole place if it can cheer ya up” he said as he leaned to brush your noses together “I’d like to see your smile again” he confessed and you had to admit it surprised you

“How so?” you heard yourself say

“When ya arrived, ya were a ray of sunshine, always laughin’ and smilin’. Just miss it” he murmured

“You killed my people” you coldly replied, before you could stop yourself, and you tried to get up but Bo was stronger than you. He forced you against his chest as he hummed in thought.

“Shouldn’t ya be happy I saved ya then?” he replied, he sounded a little bit annoyed now, but it was because he had hoped for another answer from you, he had hoped you would have seen how much he wanted you to be happy by his side.

“You could have let all of us go” you said back

“Nah, couldn’t do that; I need ya here” he kissed the top of your head

“That’s why you killed him” you murmured, your throat tight like always when you were thinking about your boyfriend. You wanted to cry, but you couldn’t do that in the arms of the man who murdered him.

“He wasn’t good enough for ya anyway. I mean he didn’t notice when I kidnapped ya, and he wasn’t strong enough to protect ya.” Bo defended his action, tightening his hold on you. He wasn’t too happy to talk about your ex boyfriend. He wanted to pretend he had never existed.

“Oh and you are strong enough to protect me?” you asked, trying not to sound too bitter or harsh but Bo heard it

“I’m a killer, baby. The safest place’s by my side.” he groaned and you let escape such a broken and sad laughter that it felt like a dagger piercing through his heart. It wasn’t the laughter he had needed to hear more than anything. His rising anger instantly died down in his chest to be replaced by pure sadness. He forced a kiss on your mouth to make you stop. You didn’t have the strength to answer it but you didn’t try to break it either.

“I’m scared of you. You killed the people I loved, with the help of your family. You are forcing me to stay in your house. You even kept me tied up in your bed for weeks. And I should believe that I’m safe with you?” you asked

“Ya are. Ya just ain’t seein’ it yet” Bo simply replied. “I promise ya, baby. Ya’re safe here, and I’ll make ya happy. One day, ya’ll even forget that any of those people ever existed, especially that man you used to kiss. Now all your kisses are mine, and only mine.” he possessively whispered to you.

But not my smile. You thought.

Bo finally got up and went to work. After last night and the way he had been able to cuddle with you in the morning, he had believed that things would go more smoothly with you but it wasn’t fully the case yet. At least you were letting him kiss, hell you were even answering his kisses. And you weren’t going to run away anymore for the moment. He was certain things were finally getting better, even if he still needed to be patient with you.

You freely wandered into the house, and Vincent checked on you a few times. Bo told him about the new rules, so the masked twin didn’t try to stop you from walking around. You fully discovered the place and you wondered how the boys could live in a house that seemed so out of time. Everything was so old, and some rooms were really dirty. At first, you told yourself it wasn’t your job to take care of a house that wasn’t even yours. But in the end, you just couldn’t stand not doing anything about it. You were bored out of your mind and you thought that cleaning up might help you feel better, and make this house more bearable for you. You started with the kitchen because there was no way you would keep eating food coming from somewhere that wasn’t completely cleaned. Vincent was a little bit surprised to see you doing the dishes and then sanitising every surface of the room, but he didn’t complain.

At the end of the day, you had done the kitchen and the living room. It felt like the house was all new and a lot more liveful. When Bo entered the house, with Lester, they both stopped in their tracks in surprise. They looked around, shocked. You heard the front door so you quickly joined them in the entrance.

“New rules guys, you remove your fucking shoes from my cleaned up floor” you pointed at their boots and they both looked at you in pure bewilderment. Bo felt warmth spreading inside his chest at the idea of you taking possession of his house so he quickly obeyed and he elbowed his kid brother for him to do the same.

You went back into the kitchen, satisfied with them.

You were so tired that day that you fell asleep in Bo’s arms without a fight and Bo rested with a smile on his lips. He would have enjoyed some cuddles, but he liked how he didn’t need to force you to rest against him.

You spent the whole week cleaning up the house. You decluttered it and you often asked for help from Vincent when you needed to move a piece of furniture around or when you wanted him to agree for you to throw away something that had been rotting for decades in a drawer. The boys truly enjoyed it, and it allowed you to stop thinking about the mess you were in. You also started to enjoy the place a lot more now and you knew it like the back of your hand, which could help when it would be time to escape. Plus, you were too tired at night to even have to cuddle with Bo, so it was really a win-win situation, even if a part of yourself was truly hating you were playing the angel of the house for them. At least, you weren’t making food; Bo was always the one making it and it was better than you wanted to admit it.

The three brothers praised you for your hard word, and you were a little bit surprised by how genuine they sounded. It was true that every time you asked Vincent’s help, he had always let go of whatever he was doing downstairs, to come to you (you were knocking at his basement door when you needed something, so you didn’t have to go down). Bo couldn’t stop himself from kissing your cheeks and shoulders. He loved how domestic it felt to be in a house you were making yours. Lester enjoyed how calm the twins seemed now you were around. Bo hadn’t yelled in so long; his whole attention was on you and his mind was solely focused on making you happy, so his anger was quietening down. He didn’t want you to see him like a violent man anymore either, so he was careful.

With the house all cleaned up, Bo took a day off work so he could spend it with you. He wanted to “reward” you. Truth to be told, you would have much preferred for him to go to work. The man was the clingiest, and he kept you in his arms all day, kissing and cuddling with you. You let him do without a fight, trying your best to not enjoy the constant attention.

You didn’t want to admit it, but if Bo hadn’t killed your people and if you hadn’t met him the way you did… You might have seen him as boyfriend material. You had often pouted at your ex because he wasn’t indulging you in a day full of cuddles, even when you were asking for it. And you were often arguing because you wanted more of his attention. Deep down, you had wanted someone to be a little bit obsessed with you and to see you like a divinity. You had never found this in anyone, and you had tried to convince yourself it was because only toxic love could give you this. At the same time, you hated that you were finding qualities in Bo’s behaviour towards you, and flaws in your ex boyfriend’s.

However one thing didn’t change: your ex was capable of making you laugh and smile. Bo couldn’t. And it was killing him, like a poison burning inside of his veins.

Each night, he was asking himself what he could have done better that day, so you would have smiled at him, even for a few seconds. He never found the answer, and it seemed like he couldn’t make you obey the third rule. He promised himself he would need to find a way. He was certain that the moment you would relax and laugh around him, you would realise you were meant to be.

--

PART III

--

Taglist: @lacychick ; @adalwolfgang ; @hollabackgrl ; @number1120 ; @the-number7 ; @hisokas-cardz ; @iwantsleepplz

#house of wax (2005) #bo sinclair x s/o #bo sinclair x you #bo sinclair x reader #bo sinclair x y/n #vincent sinclair x reader #vincent sinclair x you #vincent sinclair x y/n #vincent sinclair x sister #lester sinclair x reader #lester sinclair x sister #lester sinclair x you #lester sinclair x y/n #slasher x s/o #slasher x you #slasher x reader #slasher x y/n

[simpforrooster]

get a room.

Bradley ‘Rooster’ Bradshaw x F!Reader

summary: rooster talks you into a beach day, then wants to take advantage of you in your swimsuit.

t/w: mentions of public smut, nothing graphic, simp!rooster, cursing

a/n: y’all there ain’t much plot to this one. Just Roos simping over reader.

“If you interrupt my reading one more time, this book will become a weapon.”

Your boyfriend talked you into joining him and his friends at the beach. You put up as much of a fight as you could, but he wore you down. Now you’re lounging in your beach chair, spf 100 on your face, reading under an umbrella to the sound of something called dog-fight football.

Rooster has been vying for your attention for the past thirty minutes.

“Baby, I didn’t bring you out here in that pretty little swimsuit to hide under that umbrella,” he whines, stalking toward you. Rooster’s eyes are covered by his dad’s Ray Bans, and you’re momentarily distracted by just how good he looks.

This distraction costs you. Before you know it, Rooster’s arms wrap around your waist. He tosses you over his shoulder, effortless thanks to all the work outs the Navy has him do. A squeal manages to escape your mouth as Rooster heads straight for the ocean.

Kicking your legs does nothing but make a delicious laugh fall from Rooster’s lips. Rooster wades out into the water waiting until he’s deep enough to toss you in.

“Bradley!” you scold popping up from under the water. His hands are back on you in an instant, pulling your body against his. Bradley places a kiss on your collar bone creating goosebumps along your arms.

“Mmm, baby girl, I am obsessed with you,” he murmurs against your skin. The way his lips move on your body sends a surge of pleasure through your spine. Rooster runs a line of sloooow, deliberate kisses along your jaw.

“Stop teasing me, Lieutenant,” you say, your arms locking around Rooster’s neck. His lip quirks up at his rank.

Rooster’s hands slide down your back and stop under your ass, inviting your legs to wrap around his waist. He walks the two of you a little deeper in the water.

“This is why I invited you to the beach,” Rooster says against your lips. Kissing Rooster always feels like if you don’t do it again soon, you’ll wither away.

“We could have made out at home,” you quip. Leaning down, you pepper kisses along his collarbone. A delicious groan comes from his expert lips. “And we probably should have. You know what kissing me like this leads to.”

Rooster let’s a hand drop from your waist, coming under your chin to guide your lips back to his. His sweet kisses have turned more urgent. More passionate. He deepens the kiss a little more than what’s appropriate for public.

“I do know what this leads to,” he says. To prove his point, he adjusts his hips so you can feel just what kissing you like this does. “If we go a little further out, no one will be none the wiser.”

“Roos!” You squeal. Tightening your arms around his neck, you give him a kiss on his cheek. “We absolutely cannot.”

As if knowing where Rooster’s mind was headed, Hangman calls out from the beach, “Fucking get a room, man!”

Rooster's head falls into the crook of your neck and he groans. “Hangman, always the cockblock.”

You roll your eyes at your dejected boyfriend. “It’s cute you thought I was going to let you take me out here.”

That mustached lip flicks up. “Oh, I don’t know. I can be pretty persuasive.” To further prove his point, he gives you another long, slow kiss.

Then he dunks you into the ocean.

“BRADLEY!”

#top gun maverick #top gun #top gun maverick fic #bradley rooster bradshaw #bradley bradshaw x y/n #rooster x reader #bradleybradshaw #rooster #rooster top gun #rooster fluff #rooster bradshaw fic #rooster imagine

[axailslink]

Cocky Bitch

Stud!Riri Williams x poc FEM reader

Summary: you were talking like you were big and bold and now Riri wants you to be bold in front of her. She calls you and you tell her your true thoughts.

You're a giggling mess as you look at your phone and send the message you've been pondering on for about a good five minutes. You’d paced the room for a while in hopes that you'd send it eventually but it took a while Riri ain't one to play around with you especially if you are trying to rile her up. You take a deep breath and send it with a wide smile on your face as you do so.

you keep doing all this talking when you could really be putting your mouth to better use.

You never received a message back and your anxiety is off the walls. This ain't the first time you've texted her something like this so why is she not answering? Before you can let yourself get too in your thoughts and feelings there's a knock on your dorm room door you're quick to answer it as you were already standing. Behind the door a smiling Riri is revealed and you immediately try to close it back but she's already let herself in. "So what was with all that I should put my mouth to better use talk? Cause I'm here I brushed my teeth, I filed my nails down and I got my book bag. So what was up with all that shit you were saying?" You laugh and shrug “I was just playing it ain’t even that serious” Riri nods and watches as you try to put some distance between you and her but she doesn’t let you get far because she grabs you by your waist keeping you within kissing distance. “Tell the truth you knew you weren't playing. We both know you weren't playing, matter of fact I’m pretty sure you get off to the sound of my voice so if you about it I’m about it.”

Oh this cocky bitch.

She’s so hot yet she’s so cocky and arrogant but why the fuck does she wear it so well? You’re a little annoyed now simply because she’s right you could get off to the thought and sound of her. It's disgusting but if this theory were tested it would be true. “Get off to the sound of your voice?” she nods as she licks her lips and lets her eyes run down your form, her gaze perverted as if she can see right through your clothing. Your stomach does backflips but you’re trying to prove that she’s a cocky bitch right now so now is not the time to fold instead you mumble “and what makes you think that?” She smiles before she speaks because she knows she’s about to read you down to the last page. “I mean maybe it’s the way when we’re on the phone approximately around twelve I start to get sleepy so I nod off and you go “baby talk to me” and I’m just humming as a reply but when I do speak I don’t have much energy… However I am wide awake when I hear you start to whimper my name or when you suddenly mute yourself and I can no longer hear that raggedy ass fan in the background. So yeah I know you could get off on just my voice, maybe even just the thought of me.” You want to disagree but why lie about something she already knows the truth about? You stand there as still as a statue until she sits her bag down beside your feet and it thuds against the ground bringing you back to reality.

“Since you know so much how about you go sit down. You know I think about you when I touch myself but you don’t know what I’m imagining so I confess…” You gently push Riri towards your bed while you lock your door “I imagine you underneath me being as pretty as you are right now except you’re crying from the overstimulation this whole cocky facade you put on it’s gone. I want to get rid of it. I want to see you in shambles underneath me. Would you like to be in shambles underneath me?” Riri just sits on the edge of your bed not expecting such words to come out of your mouth not once have you ever said anything of the sort to her about this little fantasy of yours. It makes her look at you differently. She's never had anyone talk to her the way you just had and she’s interested she wants to know more about these little fantasies of yours. Maybe even experience them. “I asked a question. Riri I would love an answer in return” Riri nods but she’s finding it hard to answer because how would she? What should she say? What should she do?

“Yeah.”

A/n: as y'all know my FICS do not be edited well so if you see something confusing let me know via messaging I'll fix it.

Taglist:

@verachii

@mocha-aya

@shuriszn

@lolas-bunny

@louderfortheback

@lucillele

@shuri-lover

@quintessencewrites

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@rxcently

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@writesbyriri

@locoforshuri

@mbakuetshurisprincess

@sleepyshuri

#riri x fem reader #stud riri williams #stud!riri #black panther wakanda forever #black panther x reader #black panther imagine #black panther #black panther fics #riri imagine #riri x reader #riri williams x reader #riri williams #dominique thorne riri williams #riri x black!reader #riri x shuri #riri x oc #riri x namora #riri x you #riri williams imagine #riri williams x black!reader #riri williams black panther #riri wiliams x reader #mcu riri williams #riri williams mcu #shuri mcu #marvel fluff #marvel imagine #marvel #mcu imagine #letitia wright x black!reader

[thecreelhouse]

tramps like us

Paring: Gator Tillman x Fem!Reader

Summary: One month in, and Gator’s proving his growth and change for the better, while you finally let down the last of your walls and open up about a painful loss. Together you’re both figuring this new life out, and the clouds are finally beginning to part.

The threats of Mario Kart victories and filthy sex don’t hurt, either.

CW/Tags: PTSD, panic attacks, discussions of: anxiety, dissociation, religious trauma, endometriosis, miscarriage, grief. hurt/comfort, angst, fluff, smut: PiV sex, f receiving oral, dirty talk, light anal play, cum play, light impact play, brat/brat tamer dynamic, tiny bit of a daddy kink.

WC: 7.7k+

〘 series masterlist ✧.┊this is a sequel to part time soulmate, full time problem ✧.┊listen to the series playlist here. ✧.┊read on AO3 〙

A/N: hiiiii y’all! we’re about halfway through the series!! (Probably 3 or 4 more chapters to go before the end.) tysm for any kind words and support on this sequel. also happy endometriosis month lmao. great timing on this one, I guess. anyway, hope y’all enjoy 🖤

·············································

chapter 4 ✧. ┊

more - halsey

↻ ◁ II ▷ ↺

⋆｡♪ And would you know it right away / How hard I tried to see your face? / A little screen, a photograph, mine to take ♬ ₊˚.

·············································

The first week of you and Gator living together was certainly an adjustment. Living with your partner is much different than being snowed in with your ex-best-friend-turned-lover due to sexual tension building.

You knew that’d it’d be different, and it wasn’t the worst difference to understand, for either of you, but it wasn’t all peachy keen, either.

Over that week, though, the two of you eventually fell into a comfortable groove, finally feeling the major life changes for the two of you fall into place. Gator slowly met everyone over time; your housemates were welcoming in their own ways, and while he returned the kindness, he was also shy.

That was something you’ve never seen in Gator before.

When you asked him about it, he answered in mumbles, unsure of himself, “I dunno, haven’t met any new folks in awhile. Kinda worried they won’t like me… what if I say some stupid shit in front of ‘em?”

“Everyone’s stories ain’t mine to tell, but you’ll find out in time they’re not so different from ya’.” You warmly replied. “There’s, uh, we have a group chat— don’t worry, you’re not bein’ left out—“

“Darlin’, I don’t even have a phone right now, you’re fine.” 

“Shit. Right. We should get ya’ one. But, uh, they didn’t wanna overwhelm you. Or… well, I didn’t want them to overwhelm ya’. Anyway, everyone’s nothing but nice when they talk about ya’.”

Gator snorted, “‘Bout me? No way.”

“They all really like you so far, Gator. Everyone wants to get to know you better.” You answer earnestly. “I know opening up is nerve wracking, but I swear everyone wants to really meet you, when you’re ready. No rush.”

Back home, Gator never felt that kind of compassion from his own family. Now that he’s miles and miles and time zones away, this group of near-strangers, barely acquaintances, are so much closer to the definition of ‘family’ than his own blood were.

There were a few days of overcast, snow-free weather that you and Gator took advantage of to run errands, replace his missing phone, show him around the neighborhood, and finally find some damn curtains.

“So… they do make ‘em that big,” You murmured, running your hands along the plain fabric display in the store. Gator, of course, snorted at your choice of words. “Tillman, don’t you dare—“

His usual smirk flashed in front of you, hands held up as he feigned innocence, “I didn’t say nothin’!”

But in the midst of catching up, excitement, and settling in, you had completely forgotten about your therapy appointment, right up until a reminder popped up on your phone. Thankfully, you set them to come up a half hour beforehand, but you’re still in bed with Gator.

“Fuck. Shit.” 

“Everythin’ alright?”

“Forgot I have— fuckin’ - A — ” You stumble out of bed, tripping over a blanket on the floor. “I forgot I have therapy today.” You rummage through your drawers and closet for something to wear, frantically checking the weather on your phone before muttering a “fuck it”, throwing on whatever looked comfiest yet still socially acceptable for being in public.

Gator’s up, but he restrains himself from getting too close in your personal bubble, not wanting to get in your way. You’re searching for your bag while you try stifling noises of frustration.

“Darlin’, what can I do t’help?”

“Nothin’, m’okay, I just need my bag,” Your voice wavers, giving you away. You spot the shoulder strap peeking out from under the bed, sighing relief as you pull the bag out. Still, your hands shake as you dig through, double checking that your wallet’s inside— it’s not.

Of fucking course it’s not.

You exhale roughly, hoping you can shake off the anxiety that’s building, but your toxic thoughts only continue to spiral.

Where did I put my wallet? Why can’t I be more organized? If I was organized this shit wouldn’t happen. I have thirty minutes, and the ride is only ten minutes, but who fucking knows what nonsense is holding up the trains today—

“C’mere, you should sit for a second.” Gator sounds so far away the longer your feelings continue to snowball. “Darlin’, maybe it’s better to reschedule.”

— Can’t do that, can’t reschedule, it’s too late because the 24 hour period passed, I’ll get charged for the appointment anyway, so I should still try to go and make the most of it. But I can’t go if I don’t have my wallet and my MetroCard’s in there, and I can’t just get a new one because my money’s in there too, and it’s too far to walk in a short time period—

“Hold on, darlin’, slow down, you’re gonna work yourself up,” you don’t realize your panicked stream of consciousness was tumbling from your lips too; Gator leads you back to the bed until he’s kneeling in front of you, while you sit on the edge. His hands are in yours, thumbs softly running along your knuckles. 

“S’okay, let it out if you gotta.” Gator reaches up to wipe a stray tear away. You’re becoming notorious for crying without realizing until he comforts you.

“That’s what therapy is for,” You sniffle. “But now I- god, fuck, I hate panicking like this. It makes me feel like m’frozen in place, a- and I get so overwhelmed, until I wear myself out and needa’ sleep it off.”

“Want me to call ‘em?” Gator doesn’t wait for an answer, just grabs your phone from your bag, “Y’got the number saved?”

“It’s just saved as ‘therapy’—“

“With the… crying and nose blowing emojis, right?”

There’s a pause as the two of you glance at each other before snickering and giggling; your laugh, though, sounds pained, as you go right back to crying again.

“Uh-huh.” Gator squeezes your hand before calling; you hoped that’d be enough to ground you, but your mind starts wandering far and wide instead.

Can’t even care for yourself, can’t cry without falling apart, can’t go a day without crying— what the fuck is my problem lately?

Everything feels and sounds so far away as you dissociate, something you haven’t fallen into since the night your father hurt you. You’re still in the spot Gator left you, but miles away at the same time.

He’s still on the phone when he asks, “Darlin’, is Friday okay?” You nod, on autopilot, able to hear him this time, but you still don’t feel right. When he comes back to you, he’s mentioning something about your therapist waiving the fee, but you feel so far removed from your body, your mind, Gator’s embrace— you only nod.

In a numb trance, you curl back under the covers, with only your face peeking out. Gator would lovingly tease you for how ridiculous and cute you look if you weren’t having a dissociative episode.

So he sits with you instead, on the floor, next to the bed, just like the night he cared for you after enduring your father’s violence. 

“You want some space?”

Your voice cracks as you croak out, “No, I— m’sorry for this. I’m sorry I don’t have my shit together.”

“Oh, right, ‘cus I totally do,” Gator chuckles softly. “Angel, ya’ dealt with a lot your entire life, and just the past month alone, f’course you’re gonna be upset. I’d be more worried if you weren’t.”

“M’just scared you’ll feel like it was a mistake to come out here with me.”

“Bullshit. Leavin’ home with ya’ is somethin’ I won’t ever see as a mistake. It’s a big change for the both of us, but we’ve survived much worse than a major change for the better… and look where it got us. We’re gon’ be alright, darlin’. I swear.”

Your tears begin to calm down while your mouth hangs open. “When the hell did you become so… wise?”

Gator smiles ever so slightly, looking away with a shrug, “Been readin’ some stuff, kinda thinkin’ it’s time to give therapy a try. I don’t wanna be some angry prick anymore.”

That makes you smile, and giggle a little, too. “M’proud of you for even considering it. That ain’t easy.”

“Y’know I’m proud of you too, right? Even on your bad days.” His hand cradles your face as he watches your eyes grow heavy with exhaustion. 

“Proud of ya’ more,” You tease, eyes fluttering shut.

“Alright, brat, we’re not turnin’ this into some competition.” Gator lets out a breathy laugh, attentive to the way your breathing slows as you fall asleep. 

When he knows you’re finally at ease, he kisses your forehead before leaving you be, heading down to the main floor of the apartment; he’s got something he wants to help with, and now seems like a good time to start.

·············································

When Gator offered to clean out the unfinished nursery for you, he didn’t anticipate your miscarriage to hit him as hard as it currently did. 

While he gripped onto the crib’s frame, he wondered how long it took to paint the walls, to get halfway around the room, only find out this nursery would never serve its purpose. That thought alone made his heart ache.

Okay, so maybe the crib wasn’t the greatest place to start.

What names did you pick for the baby? Did you go to your first ultrasound appointment alone? Was the baby shower already planned? What was your reaction when you saw the test result appear on that tiny, flimsy stick? His mind continues to spin with more questions and no answers while he removes the tarp from the dresser. 

Curiosity gets the best of him, and he gently opens a drawer, finding teensy, tiny onesies. He feels sick, shutting the drawer and throwing the tarp back over the dresser.

“Jesus Christ,” He mutters, choking back tears. This shouldn’t be hurting him this much. This didn’t happen to him, it happened to you.

But maybe that’s why it hurts so much; knowing you endured such a horrid heartbreak, so much physical and mental anguish, just to leave the hospital alone. Alone and empty and shattered. You are everything to Gator, and he can’t stomach the fact that you, the person he loves most, braved through such a devastating loss. 

He doesn’t even know the full story, patiently waiting for you to open up when you’re ready, but he knows enough. The surface details are still tragic enough.

Gator understood this was so personal, an excruciating experience; he doesn’t blame you for keeping it buried, away from him, but he’s having a hard time wrapping his head around on how you were able to keep it from him.

And while he’s always wanted a family of his own, he’d never push that dream onto you. If you didn’t want it as badly as he did, it wasn’t worth it. It wouldn’t be right.

Gator never wanted to overwhelm you with that conversation, but he won’t know until he asks, until it’s brought up.

While he’s glancing around the room, trying to decide where to start first, there’s movement in the loft before you call out, “Gator? Where’d ya’ go?” 

Before he responds, his throat feels dry and constricted as he tries staving off his own tears. “In here,” even his tone sounds weak.

You make your way into the abandoned nursery, sucking in a breath as you glimpse at Gator, frozen in the middle of it all.

“Hey, you alright?” You come up behind him, arms winding around his waist while you rest your head on his back. You can feel him tense up while he’s hoping to shake off the emotions.

“M’okay, I just wanted to… t’help,” Gator still faces away from you, but his large hands envelope yours, resting against his torso. “Jus’ not sure where to start.”

“Babe, look at me,” You step back and let go to give him room to turn around, but he doesn’t. So you walk around, looking up to find Gator silently crying. “What happened? What’s going on?”

“Sorry, it’s just… a lot.”

“You don’t have t’do this. I appreciate you offering but if you’re not up for it, don’t force yourself.”

Gator pinches the bridge of his nose before running the same hand over his face. “No, m’gonna help, I just can’t… m’sorry for cryin’, this was your loss, not mine.”

“It’s not a bad thing to show emotion over someone else’s loss. Just shows y’got empathy, and while I hate that this hurts you, too, it really means a lot that you care.”

He pulls you close, holding you with care before kissing your head as you duck under his chin. “M’so sorry I wasn’t here for you… for this.”

“You didn’t know.”

“Yeah, but I should’ve known. If I didn’t push you away, I would’ve known.” The more he discovers about your new life and what he’s missed out on, the more he regrets ever breaking the friendship to begin with.

“This is gonna sound awful, but,” You’re cringing at yourself already. “Even if the baby survived, I wouldn’t have come home with them.”

“What? Why not?”

“Wouldn’t ever want to bring a kid around my parents. I was dead set on that from the start.” 

Gator gets that, now more than ever; if the two of you ever had a baby, he’d never visit home with them. Neither your family or his would ever deserve to meet them.

Then again, Gator wouldn’t visit home at this point at all. Even if he wasn’t so disgusted and heartbroken by his father’s actions, from past to present, he still wouldn’t visit him, especially not in prison.

All of this makes him wonder if it’s worth bringing up the question, the idea, of maybe starting a family one day. Maybe it’s not the best time, but he can’t stave off the curiosity.

With a deep breath, he wanders back over to the crib before offering his thoughts, “Darlin’…we- we could save this stuff, in case you— we— ”

A laugh slips out, not cruel, but not cheerful, either. You know what he’s trying to say.

‘In case we have a baby someday.’

“We won’t. I won’t.”

“I— I ain’t trying to force anythin’, I just… fuck, m’sorry.”  Gator slides down the wall, right along the edge of where the paint stopped, knees bent to rest his arms on top. You move to sit close to him, resting your head on his shoulder.

“Gator, can I be honest about somethin’?”

“Of course, darlin’. What’s on your mind?”

“… You’ve got no idea how much I’d love to start a family with you, but I ain’t riskin’ it again. If something happened, it’d hurt you, too. I couldn’t risk it knowing your heart could be broken like mine was.” You wipe tears away with your hoodie sleeve. 

Gator tilts his head to rest on top of yours, and reaches for the hand near him, intertwining his fingers with yours.

“If… if you ever change your mind, I’d take that risk in a heartbeat. That’s your decision to make, and I’m not tryin’ to pressure ya’…” His thumb rubs softly along your hand. “… but just in case, I’d take the chance if you wanted to again.”

Even as teenagers, Gator always admired how naturally it came to you to care for your sister when your parents failed her. He had no doubt in his mind you’d be an amazing mother, and despite really admitting it, he knows how hurt you still are that your chance was ripped away from you.

“Could you imagine how loud our kid would be?” You snicker, while again, you wipe away tears. Gator squeezes your hand as he laughs with you. “Neither of us know how to ever shut up, that kid would be doomed from the start.”

“And how clumsy they’d be,” He adds in hopes that it’ll keep your smile up. “We’d have to baby-proof everything.”

“We’d also spoil the hell outta them.”

Gator grins, “You sayin’ we’d be those parents who take their one year old to Disney when they ain’t gonna remember shit?”

“Oh, that’s exactly what I’m sayin’.” You smile back. “But also, ‘cause we never got to go.”

“We weren’t even allowed to like anythin’ fun,” As sad as that fact is, it still makes you and Gator laugh. “Jesus, our parents suck.”

“Yeah… but at least it showed us what not to do as parents.”

There you go again, finding the bright side, if you could even call it one among the bleak facts of your past. Gator knew you always tried to keep on the side of optimism, but he’s really starting to see why everyone else here calls you Sunshine.

“Give ‘em a better childhood than either of us had,” His voice cracks; he didn’t want to start a family to prove a point, to be a better parent just to get back at his father. He just wanted that normality with someone he loves.

The older Gator gets, the more he realizes he does have love to give, it was just repressed most of his life from toxic masculinity, heavily influenced by his life. Mainly coming from his father, constantly branding it into his mind that any emotions other than anger made a man weak.

Gator’s ashamed it took him this long to realize the error of his ways, how he’s old enough to know better but continued to stay ignorant. If it wasn’t for you reminding him regularly that growth is better than stagnancy, he’d probably end up in a fate similar to his father’s.

“You’d totally become one of those dads with the stereotypical, goofy dad humor,” You tease. “Like… you’d totally think it’d be hilarious to dress your kid up as an alligator for their first Halloween.” 

“C’mon, I ain’t that corny.”

“Not yet, but you would be.” The words sting as they hit your own ears. ‘Not yet’, but really, not ever. Not with you, at least. 

That’s the thing that plays with the shards of your heart, already broken, over and over again. The more you dwell on it, the deeper the wounds become from those shards never being left alone.

“Won’t ever have that as a dumb memory to laugh back on years later,” Your bottom lip trembles, and you’re annoyed with yourself that the sweet hypotheticals are only tugging you back into the reality of never becoming a mother. Never starting a family with Gator. Never unconditionally loving a little one of your own.

A deafening silence falls between the two of you; Gator’s not sure what to say, not wanting to force positivity on you, but he hates seeing you so torn apart by this. He hates that he can’t fix this for you.

Without a word, you push yourself off the floor, reaching under the tarp over the dresser; you pull out a small paper from the drawer and hand it over to him.

It’s an ultrasound image. The last one before the miscarriage. 

Gator hesitates to take it, silently checking with you as he looks up; he doesn’t want to pressure you to talk about this. He can wait until you’re ready, but the look you give him in return says you actually want to talk about this.

Even if it’ll hurt, you want to tell him. You need to, and it’s only fair, after all; if he has to open up so you can help and be there for him, it’s only right if you do the same.

“Lil’ peanut wasn’t really a peanut anymore. I was able to feel them. Not a lot. Just tiny… flutters of movement.” You hold your tummy, a subconscious action you gained when you were pregnant. Now it’s just a symbol of you longing for what never came to be.

“They said the baby was around the size of a banana... So I kept picturing a banana instead of a baby, and every time I laughed about it, they’d move.”

Gator’s so fixated on the photo of your tiny angel, the one you never got to hold, the one you never got to raise— they’d be nearly a year old by now. A lump rises in his throat as he holds back his tears, mainly upset for you, but something twists his stomach at the thought of never meeting them, either.

“There’s a reason I’m on the shot, y’know. N- not that bein’ on it purely for sex ain’t a valid reason, but it helps a lot with- uh- you remember how sick I used to get during my period, right?”

He nods, turning to you, photo still in his grasp. “Yeah, you’d be home the whole week sometimes.” He remembers coming over, sneaking you movies and comfort snacks— usually your choices in either were considered secular by your parents, just like everything else you had an interest in. If it didn’t involve keeping sweet and obeying, whether it be to God directly or through a man, it was considered sinful.

“You used to bring that lil’ portable DVD player, remember? Hide it under school books and your damn bible so my parents would leave us alone.” You smirked at the memory of pulling a tiny act of rebellion off, every month. 

The slight humor isn’t lost on Gator, but he also remembers how that was your only source of comfort during that hellish routine week. You weren’t even allowed to take painkillers, not when your parents believed ‘praying the pain away’ actually worked.

They also loved scaring both you and your sister into believing the pain was just God’s punishment for any wrongdoings the month prior. 

“Went my whole damn life thinking periods were supposed to be that painful. Ives was the one to educate me, after I kept suffering and only thinking over the counter shit could help. She encouraged me to see a doctor, and I found out how wrong this all was.

“It ended up being endometriosis.” Gator looks perplexed, so you explain, “Basically, tissue similar to the kind that lines the uterus grows outside of it— long story short it just fucking sucks. And hurts, at least for me, a lot. It varies for everyone, like… some folks have a hard time infertility, with sex, and thankfully it doesn’t bother me too bad with sex, if at all.”

“Why haven’t ya’ told me?”

You shrug like it’s not a big deal, “It never hurt enough to bring it up.”

“Y’always promise you’ll tell me if somethin’ hurts, or doesn’t feel good. Why’re you hidin’ that from me?” Gator doesn’t sound offended, he’s not taking it personally. He’s upset that you thought you had to hide this from him.“You’ve been helpin’ me through this,” he points to the bandaged eye socket, “Why can’t you let me help you?”

“Gator… there’s nothing to help me with, not with this. I appreciate that you care, but you can’t change or fix anything. Some bodies aren’t built to have sex, or have a baby, and that’s okay. I just had to learn the hard way.”

He slides an arm around your shoulders, pulling you into him, keeping quiet to let you continue.

“I was gonna start birth control to at least make the cycles bearable… and then I found out. I was so sick, by day 3 I realized it had to be morning sickness. Ivy made me take a buncha’ tests, and each one was positive. I was warned about infertility, but never about how high the risk of miscarriages are with endo.”

“Was… that guy, was he still with ya’ by then?”

“Oh, fuck no,” You push out a laugh, but it’s humorless. “Once I even mentioned seeing a doctor for everything, before I knew I was pregnant, he ghosted me. It’s my fault for not being safer with him, but he convinced me it was okay—“

“Darlin’, the fault ain’t on you. That scumbag shoulda’ respected ya’ from the start.” You don’t miss the way Gator’s fist clenches while still holding the photo. He catches himself before he can accidentally crumple the print up, handing it back to you instead.

“I did everythin’ right. I slept well, I ate well, I took those damn vitamins everyone swears by when you’re pregnant. I was careful, Gator. I was so, so careful. 

“I cared for myself before that, but just knowin’ I was a safe place for this tiny, little thing… I did everything I could to keep them safe from the outside. Never knew there could be threats inside, too.” You rub your eyes with your sleeve, staining it from your tears.

“God… I was so relieved to be knocked out for the procedure, and the pain after wasn’t so bad… but I felt s- so empty. And not in the literal sense, but a huge part of my life was taken away before it could even begin. T- to be promised that, to go through constant appointments and treatments and be told things are fine just to have it all fuckin’ ripped away… I wanted to die.”

Gator pulls you closer, both arms around you now as you feel the loss all over again. He never expected you to confide in him so soon, and all he can think of is how much he regrets pushing you away. 

He regrets that he never attended your sister’s funeral. He regrets not comforting you in the time after as you mourned. He regrets not stopping you before your parents drove you off to the airport to apologize.

Instead any interaction was from a distance, putting you down for a life far out of your control. You were just trying to survive. You lost your sister, you lost him, and once life finally gets back on track for you, even better than before, some loser comes along and tries throwing you off… but you took the situation and turned it into your own. You made the best of it.

Only for reality to give you another loss to grieve through.

“Surprised y’didn’t get an abortion,” Gator murmurs, and you know he means no ill intent with his words. 

“You know me, I’m supportive with this shit for others… But I- I couldn’t do it. I was scared. I was scared of either direction, but somethin’ got me so attached, and I wish it didn’t. In the end, I still had to get a medical abortion… that’s some kinda’ fucked up joke if you ask me.

“I never wanted kids. I never wanted to bring a kid into this world and pass the trauma down onto them.”

“You’d never. Never once saw you hurt Lo, ‘specially not in the ways your parents hurt the two of ya’. I know you’d never hurt a kid of your own.”

“I failed them. I failed my sister. I was so depressed, m’not kiddin’ when I say I wanted to die. Only thing keepin’ me alive was this family here. Ives tried to get me t’reach out to you… but I was scared. I didn’t just… wanna drop that on you, and you had to have hated me back then—“

“I never hated you, darlin’. I know it— I made it seem like that, but I didn’t, and m’sorry I wasn’t up front ‘bout it.”

“It’s… I’m not mad at you, Gator. I’ve been growin’ past that pain. Sometimes it still hurts, but you’re not that person anymore. You’re the Gator I grew up with, the person who had a good heart n’ always protected or comforted me. I think you were right, back home, when you said you don’t think we ever really hated each other.”

“We’re just two stubborn idiots,” Gator teases, earning a flash of a smile from you. 

“But as far as startin’ a family goes … I can’t put myself through the risk again. I refuse to put you through that heartbreak. I love you too much to do that to you.”

“Like I said, I’d take the risk in a heartbeat if you wanted someday, but I- I respect your choice.”

You snort through your tears, “Gator Tillman respectin’ women? Never thought I’d see the day.”

“Gon’ let that one slide, but I’m learnin’... Tryin’, at least.”

“Proud of ya’ for tryin’ and learnin’, love.”

“Can’t fuckin’ imagine growin’ a whole human being inside like that. Pregnancy is fuckin’ metal as hell.”

You laugh, not expecting that. “You’re not wrong.”

“It’s fucked up how my dad made me believe men were superior, and I wish I learned he was wrong sooner… You’re stronger than I’d ever hope to be.”

While you appreciate the sentiment, you still chuckle, “See, that’s the other reason why I should never get pregnant again. Might be strong but definitely didn’t stop me from becoming even more of a whiny baby.”

“I feel like if you’re pregnant, you get a free pass to whine and cry all ya’ want. You’re literally growin’ a whole damn human and carryin’ them for nine months.” 

“Okay, stop saying it like that, you make pregnancy sound like an alien experiment, or somethin’.” Your laugh fades out quickly. “Th- this isn’t a deal breaker or anythin’, is it?”

Gator doesn’t hesitate to answer, “Hell no. Just bein’ with you is enough, more than enough.” He’s not lying, but he’s burying  his emotions.

“You’re still disappointed though, I can tell.”

“Well, sure it’d be everythin’ to me to start a family with you, but if life has other plans, we roll with it, right?” Not a hint of doubt lies in his words. “Even just the two of us—“

As if on cue, Lovebug runs in, purring loudly as he climbs into Gator’s lap before curling up and falling asleep.

“— okay, and this guy—“ 

The two of you laugh, and Lovebug isn’t happy about the movement the sound causes. “We’re still a family. And everyone here, too. Baby or no baby, we’re doin’ alright. We’ll be alright.”

“Yeah, well, no need to have a baby when this little demon is around.”

Gator covers the cat’s ears, “She didn’t mean that.” Lovebug wiggles out of his grasp and runs back out of the room. “You hurt his feelings.”

You roll your eyes.“Speaking of… Lovebug’s gotta go back home.”

“What? Why? This ain’t his home?”

“Well- it is, but he prefers the shop. That’s where the other two strays ended up, too. He’s probably missin’ ‘em.”

“But what if he misses me?”

“Gator when on earth did you become such a cat person?”

He glares at you, “… M’not.”

“Uh-huh, sure.” You grin before sheepishly adding, “If you wanna come with me tomorrow ya’ can. But you don’t gotta, I know it’s like, not the most exciting thing in the world.”

“Y’kiddin’ me? You worked so hard on that shop, f’course I wanna come with.” His face lights up with a sincere response, like he’s proud of you, because he is. It gives you butterflies, and for a moment, everything feels alright. Because it will be alright, especially with your best friend by your side.

“Thank you for sharin’ all that with me.” Gator gets up, pulling you with him. He wraps you in his embrace. “M’sorry you went through any of that. If I can help with anythin’, you tell me, got it?”

“I will,” You promise, pushing up on your toes to kiss his cheek. “And let’s… we don’t have to worry ‘bout this right now.” You lazily gesture to the room around the two of you. “We’ll get to it when we’re ready.”

“When we’re ready,” Gator repeats, giving you a quick, tight squeeze. “No rush.”

“Hey, uh, y’wanna play Mario Kart?” You pull back as you ask, hoping to uplift both of your moods. “I’ll let ya’ win.”

“Yeah, sure, of course ya’ will, freak,” Gator narrows his gaze as he laughs sharply. “I think even with one eye I’ll kick your ass on rainbow road.”

·············································

By the following day, you felt much better, especially excited to show Gator the bookshop. 

It’d almost be a month since you took off work, and you felt guilty for leaving Flor to run her shop and yours on her own. She said it was no problem, but you needed to get back to work, and needed the money, too.

Lovebug also had to get back to his actual home, being the bookshop; you brought him home with you as comfort during the week of uncertainty waiting for Gator. There was an unlikely bond between the two, and you weren’t looking forward to breaking that.

With a pair of boots, warm, cozy thigh highs, a comfy skirt and a sweater, you’re dressed for the day. You don’t fuss much with your hair or makeup, you had other priorities.

The main priority was getting Lovebug in his carrier; he hated the process, but loved to be carried around like a baby. Once he’s inside, he’s so fascinated looking out the bubble window of the backpack carrier, watching the city life around him.

Gator finds you trying to coax Lovebug into the carrier, sitting on the floor while he’s on the window bench, as you try bribing him with treats to hopefully entice the cat inside. He can’t help smiling over your desperate bargaining with this tiny cat.

“Buggy, c’mon, I know you miss your friends,” you shake a bag of treats, but Lovebug turns his head, ignoring you. You groan in frustration, flopping back onto the floor. “Please, lil’ dude, I gotta go to work.”

Footsteps grow closer until Gator appears in your line of sight as you stare up at the ceiling. “Want me to try?”

“Please? He likes you more anyway.” You murmur, then grumble, “Cat stealer.”

Ignoring your comment, Gator crouches over by Lovebug, who happily gets up to crawl onto his shoulders, flopping over one like dead weight.

“You’re such a weird lil’ guy…”

“He is— are you fucking kidding me right now?”

In seconds, Gator’s able to lead the cat into the backpack carrier, closing it up without a fight. You sit up, staring at the two of them in disbelief.

“Oh my god, fine, he’s your cat now.”

Gator laughs, “M’not stealin’ your cat, I promise!” Then, he looks down at the backpack before shyly asking, “… Can I carry him though?”

·············································

“Man, this storm fucking sucks.” Your face is squished against the glass of the front door, watching the rain come down in buckets.

After a calm first day back, you closed up a little early; Flor had to leave to grab supplies for a wedding makeup gig she had the next morning, and since the storm seemed to be keeping everyone home, closing early seemed like a good idea. 

“We can wait it out, I don’t mind.” Gator shrugs, hands wrapping around you from behind. “But can’t ya’ just…. take the subway, or whatever?”

“Gator, honey, we’re two blocks away, and the nearest stop is past the apartment. It doesn’t work like that.”

“Well, I dunno, what did ya’ expect, draggin’ my midwestern ass out here?” He snorts, eyes trickling down the glass along with the raindrops. “We can call a cab, or somethin’, maybe?”

“Too expensive for two blocks.”

“But if it makes gettin’ home easier, I don’t mind payin’ for it.” He offers, but you groan something about ‘save your damn money’. “I don’t mind if we wait, y’just look tired, darlin’.”

You solidify the statement with a wide, drawn out yawn. It’s contagious, passing onto Gator while he laughs through it.

“S’okay, maybe I can do somethin’ to knock off tomorrow’s list,” You wander away from him and into one of the narrow aisles, crowded with used books. You start organizing them, only by genre, because you can hold alphabetical order off until tomorrow.

“You had a long day, don’t push yourself.” Gator comes up behind you, enveloping you in his arms before kissing the top of your head, trailing down to your face slowly. It starts innocent at first, or so it seems, at least. “M’so proud of you, it’s easy t’see how much love you put into this place…” His kisses down your neck, teasingly slow, “Thanks for lettin’ me tag along with ya’.”

You giggle, playfully pushing him away before he can reach your collarbone, “I don’t mind, keeps me busy.” You’ve got a small stack of books in your arms, narrowing your eyes at him with a hint of a smile. “And that means more than y’know, love. Thank you.”

He hums, shrugging off the sappy moment, “I could keep ya’ busy too, y’know.”

“I’m sure you can, Tillman.” You playfully roll your eyes before stepping onto the ladder against the tall shelves. Three steps in, and Gator’s arms are around your legs, anchoring you in place. 

You grab onto the rungs in front of you, books still awkwardly in your arms, keeping yourself steady as one of his hands moves up the back of your thigh.

“Gator…” You warn, but his name comes out more like a soft plea to touch you.

“This why you wore a skirt? So I could touch ya’ easier?” His hand reaches your ass, roughly grabbing at the softest part. A whine immediately escapes you. 

“It’s fuckin’ January and pouring, the hell are ya’ wearin’ this for?” He pushes the skirt up and over your hips, groaning at the sight of the thin, stringy thong you’re wearing. “Jesus, darlin’…  gon’ get sick runnin’ ‘round half naked like this.”

“I- I have a sweater on too!” You protest, glancing back at Gator while his other hand mirrors the actions of the first. “And thigh highs. We were inside all day, I’m covered, like, enough.”

“Yeah, fuckin’ love these on ya’,” He kisses up the back of your leg, starting at the ditch of your knee, upward along your thigh, leaving love bites once he reaches where your bare skin begins. You drop the books to the floor, holding yourself up with a steadier grasp on the ladder. “Can’t be walkin’ ‘round like this, not when you’re all mine.”

Gator doesn’t care what you wear, and you know that. But when he talks like this, becomes possessive before fucking your brains out, it ignites something deep within you.

There’s two directions you could take this: become a subby, compliant mess from the minimal touch he’s given so far, or brat it out.

It’s almost always the latter choice for you.

“I like the attention, though. Makes me feel good ‘bout myself.”

The next love bite is rougher, while the grip he has on you isn’t so cruel, not yet, but it’s enough to make you gasp at the sting of pressure.

“Don’t I give ya’ enough attention?” His voice drops low and gravelly, warning you to back down and behave; his fingers play with the strap of your panties teasingly. Pulling back as far as the fabric gives, he lets go, snapping it back against your skin. “Don’t I make ya’ feel good?”

“Y’do, but sometimes I want more—“ His hand smacks your ass while you white knuckle the ladder rung, trying to keep your balance. 

“Greediest slut I’ve ever met,” Gator slides his fingers between your legs before making their way to your folds, slipping between with ease. He avoids touching your clit, so you push your backside out further, desperate for even the lightest contact where you need him most. 

That only causes him to pull his hand away completely.

“Yeah? Like you’ve got past experience to compare this to,” Your ridiculing only makes him grit his teeth while his jaw locks. There’s a certain rush to pushing his buttons, to getting under his skin. One you can’t find elsewhere, one that no one has ever given you.

“Whatever game you’re playin’ ain’t one you’ll win.” 

You look over your shoulder with a smirk, “Right, I forgot, you’re always a winner.” Gator rips the elastic of your panties, fabric coming loose before he pulls it away completely. “Oh, you fuckin’ asshole! I can’t walk home with nothin’ on!”

“Not like that pair covered anythin’ to begin with.” He taunts, tucking the ruined underwear in his back pocket before spanking you again. “You’ve got that skirt, darlin’. You’ll be fine.”

Fuming, you make it down two steps before he shoves you against the ladder, gasping when his strong hands force your legs apart. His fingers are back on your heat, wantonly toying with the slick between your folds. His touch ghosts over your clit this time, letting you feel something, if anything at all.

You’re absorbed by his taunting caress, eyes fluttering shut while you’re lost in the buzz from the weak friction, causing you to miss the order he gives.

Gator roughly grabs your chin, forcing your eyes open, “I said open.”

Obeying, your mouth falls open while he continues to clutch your chin in place, spitting onto your tongue. You whimper, about to close your mouth, until two fingers— the ones he just had teasing your cunt— run along your tongue, pushing the saliva further back to your throat.

“Suck.”

Again, you comply, eyes locked with his as your tongue swirls around his calloused fingers, tinged with the taste of your arousal. Your moan is dulled as he gags you with his digits. 

“I wanna reward m’girl,” He pushes his fingers further, smirking at the tears welling up in your eyes. “‘Cause ya’ worked so hard today… but ya’ ruined it for yourself, brat.” 

Ripping his hand back, you’re left panting while Gator moves behind you, spanking you again. Then again. And again. You lose count after ten swats.

His hand stops against your skin, rubbing the red, bound-to-be-bruised-by-morning swell of your backside. A whimper floats out of you at the soothing sensation.

“M’sorry, I’ll be good,” You murmur, gasping when his touch is back on your core, but only for a moment. “Need you, need you, need you.”

“I know you do, darlin’,” He ruts into you a few times before noisily undoing his belt. Grabbing your arms, he pulls them behind you, using the belt to secure and restrain you. “You okay?”

“So fucking okay— oh, fuck—“ You barely answer before Gator pushes into you, walls pulsing around him as you adjust to the stretch, like any other time. It’s a delicious, mind-spiraling type of pain, one that gets you soaked every time he fills you completely.

“Y’could be a slut all ya’ want, but ain’t no one gonna fuck you like I do, huh?”

Gator slams into you, shoving you harder against the ladder. He holds you up enough that you don’t slip through and get hurt. He’s got other ideas to give you the pain you crave instead.

“Nuh-uh, only you,” You answer breathily, feeling him as he pulls out completely, only to drill into you again, full force, no mercy. “Oh— g- god, Gator…”

“Ain’t no one who can fill ya’ like I can, right?”

You shake your head, dominated by the thrill of fucking like this. Even if the shop is closed, there’s something so filthy about this that has your legs shaking already.

Gator spanks you, “C’mon, brat, y’know how to talk back t’me all the fuckin’ time. Where’s that mouth now?”

“N- no one fills me like you, no one fucks me like y— fuck!”

Gator grabs your ass, roughly spreading your cheeks before spitting onto your tight hole. His thumb circles the tight ring, spreading the slick. Your cunt constricts him, bringing out a shuddered grunt from him. “Gonna fuck ya’ all over the fuckin’ city if it means everyone knows you’re mine.”

Your eyes roll back as his thumb sinks into your hole; the pressure, thought slight, is still enough to make Gator’s cock jump inside you.

“Wish we had that pretty lil’ plug right now… felt so fuckin’ good last time, darlin’.”

Your hands grab at nothing, desperate for something, anything to hold.

“Can’t hold your hand, brat, kinda busy here,” He sharply laughs, one hand still playing with your ass, the other holding you upright. “Fuck… g- gonna let me fuck you back here someday?”

You whimper; this isn’t the first time he’s said this during sex, and each time it drives you insane.

“N- now,” You plead weakly.

“Fuckin’ wish, brat. Gotta work ya’ up to that. M’too big for ya’.”

“Feels good, though…” His finger sinks deeper into you, causing you to cry out. He hasn’t even touched your clit, but your cunt is trembling from the pressure and sting of both holes being filled. “Want you to be my first, daddy.”

“Jesus fucking christ—“  Gator slams into you brutally, losing composure over your confession. “Surprised a brat like you ain’t been fucked there yet.”

Even through the haze of desire, you’re still able to wind him up even more with, “Been savin’ myself for you.”

Gator’s gone. He’s falling apart in seconds, cock twitching and pumping his arousal in you, filling your cunt as he groans loudly. You can’t see the way his eyes roll back, or how his head lolls back as his hips thrust sloppily to the very end.

Winded, he’s still determined to see you through to your own high; he lets go of you with the hand holding you up, snaking around to your clit. It doesn’t take much longer for you to cry out his name, convulsing around him with a death grip. 

You’ve barely come down when he roughly pulls you off the ladder while pulling out of you, shoving you down to the rug, face down, ass up. You whine over the manhandling and loss of him, but the whine turns into a filthy moan as he starts eating you out.

“G- Gator… ohmyfuckinggod—“ You feel your stomach flip, realizing he just came in you moments ago, and now his mouth is on you, eating you like a starved man.

“Fuck… kinda like how we taste together,” He groans into your folds. 

“Feels t- too good, I’m— I’m close,” With how intense and rough Gator’s being, you’re going to have rug burn on your damn face at this rate.

“S’fine, got time t’kill anyway,” He sucks on your clit, making you cry out and shake all over again, back to back orgasms making your body grow weak and limp. He holds your hips up anyway as he continues. “Gonna keep goin’ till the storm ends, darlin’.”

#gator tillman x reader #gator tillman x you #gator tillman x fem!reader #gator tillman smut #tramps like us #part time soulmate full time problem #my fics #Is 4 am a good time to post? No. Do i care? Kinda yeah why am i awake rn jfc

[be-my-ally]

Before the Draft Notice

This follows on directly from Splashing Around Chapter 1 & Chapter 2. 

Hello darlings! So, I had something else ready to post, but, well, it's not yet even Halloween and therefore I’ve been informed it might be a little, teeny, tiny, bit early for Christmas fics - so here I am, bridging the gap with a little teeny tiny filler. Let me know though if/when you think it might be the correct time for festive fluffy fun! 

warnings: kissing, implications of underage. unedited (I will probs come back to this tomorrow).

1957 elvis x oc

wc: 2.4k

Elvis wasn’t home soon though, he dawdled in California until they all saw the news articles of him at a fancy Halloween party and though the other girls had a lot to say about it, Louise privately thought it made sense; he was young, he was popular, he was making it, why wouldn’t he be rubbing shoulders with the starlets and actors of the west coast? Although that didn’t mean she didn’t share their fears, understanding their annoyance was borne from stress that he was leaving them behind. Besides, he’d called in a terrible temper the night before and it was, or at least Louise thought, an effective way for him to blow off some steam. He had been on the phone to them for hours, forcing them to pass it around to one another, telling them the same story over and over - presumably intending on doing so until someone managed to calm him down. Louise dreaded to think of the cost of just that one call - surely more than she’d spent on the phone in a year. 

“Hey Elvis, it’s me.” She could picture his nostrils flaring as she heard a puff from him,  

“Lou-ise.” He was curt, and she worried the phone cord around her finger, twirling it as she tried to think of what to say; desperate to prove herself to him and to the others - to succeed where all the others had failed.  

“I, uh, I heard ‘bout the, I heard about the police.”  

“Did ya? Wish they’d just move on; I’m not doing anything wrong. I don’t get why they hafta keep picking on me.” Louise hums, and he continues, “They’re sayin’ I’m - I’m lewd, got the goddamn police after me again like I’m a fucking criminal. Ain’t enough they’ve made me 1A already, they gotta try and prove their goddamn point.” She sighs,  

“Well - I thought that didn’t bother you anymore?” He huffs back at her,  

“Well, no, it don’t. I find it funny most of the time now. I mean - they didn’t even look at me the whole night, but it’s still, it’s still not fair to treat my fans like that either is it?” She murmurs back to him in what she hopes is a consolatory tone,  

“No, no you’re right El… it’s not, it’s not fair.” She pauses, briefly, “What’s really the matter though? That’s nothing you haven’t dealt with before.” There’s a longer pause, as if he’s debating whether to tell her. She shakes out a hand to the others left in the room motioning at them to leave. They grumble but filter out, talking about who was driving who home. Then, in a whine,  

“Some reporter had me read something from Sinatra.” Ah, there it was, “And, and, I just don’t know where he gets off being so mean.” He sounds like a little boy complaining about someone in the school yard, and Louise smiles,  

“Uh-huh, I hear you. He is being awfully unfair. You want me to write an opinion piece back to him? I could hand it in for extra credit in my English class.” He laughs,  

“Oh, I shouldn’t be bothering you with all this. Not at -” She can practically hear him adding up the time difference on his fingers, “- well, this late on a school night.” He pauses, “What are you doin’ there anyway - shouldn’t you be at home?” She winces, it was pretty late, and she’d hoped he wouldn’t ask that.  

“Well, we were all here waiting for you to call. Wanted to be here in case you needed us - all of us that could be here anyway - and well, a lot of the others have gone home but, well, your mom said I could stay as long as I liked so, well, here I am.”  

“But you’ve been keeping up with school? You’ve not been skippin’?” She rolls her eyes, and he tuts,  

“I heard that.” Louise giggles back, 

“You can’t possibly!”  

“Trust me - I always know.” He sighs, “God, I can’t wait to be home.” He yawned, jaw cracking, “Gotta, gonna go to this party, just - think it’s just a lil, little, uh, gathering - then I’ll be home.”  

“Well, I’ll be waiting,” He pauses,  

“Well - it’s, it’s probably best if you, well if you go home ‘til I call for you hmm?” It wasn’t unexpected, but Louise still felt her stomach drop.  

“Yeah, of course, uh, whatever you say.”  

“Just be for the best, I think honey.” 

“Yeah, I get it, sure.”  

“Sleep tight then baby, I’ll see you soon.”  

“Yeah-huh, you too.” He hangs up and she’s left holding the receiver, in his empty living room, uncertain really what he’d been saying.  

When he finally got back Louise didn’t get a call, and then she heard he had left for Hawaii before she had managed to muster up the courage to call him herself. Once Elvis returned, he didn’t call her himself for days, although she did get several calls inviting her up to the house which she of course accepted every time. And every night it was the same story, she sat there, quietly with the other girls while he chatted and played evening after evening. Louise wasn’t being ignored, not really. He was just…sharing his affections. Equalizing his attention amongst them all. It wasn’t until a week later, on the weekend, that he came around to the girls, flopping down onto the sofa between them and resting his head onto Louise’s lap. Frances had his feet on hers, and she softly brushed his sole until he huffed, twitching his foot away and turning his head into Louise’s stomach. She gently stroked his hair, fingers barely catching in his freshly washed strands. She could feel his hot breath against her skin through the thin fabric of her dress and it makes her hair stand up on edge, the intimacy of the moment almost too much for her as she tries to keep her breathing steady.  

“I’ve got a bad feelin,’ Ma does too.” Louise’s hand stills, her other coming down to tickle his back, soft fingers dancing over his shoulders. Elvis twists his head, nodding against her hand and Louise gets the hint returning to gently brushing through his hair. 

Frances pipes up,  “What d’you mean?”  

“I’ve - I’ve got a nasty feeling about my notice - don’t think it’ll be long now.”  

“Oh.” Louise feels her chest tighten, worry already setting in as Frances responds,  

“No! I’m sure that’s not true Elvis! You’ve got so much already planned!” He huffs, and Louise whispers back to him,  

“Well, we’ll deal with it if it is,” He whines a little into her,  

“Y’all gotta promise me - promise me you’ll all be good while I’m gone, I don’t - don’t wanna hear you’ve gotten into trouble.” He pauses, his voice muffled by the fabric of her dress, “Don’t want anything to change.” Louise can’t help but think about all the ways she wants things to change, namely how it’s now been months since they last kissed properly, and she felt like she was close to begging for it - propriety be damned. Whether Elvis notices her telepathic hinting, or if it was always in the plan is unclear, but within the hour he had returned to his bedroom, presumably to get changed again although he didn’t bother to announce that to the room. George tapping on her shoulder twenty minutes later after some sort of Chinese whispers had taken place with orders for her to be sent up to him.  

Louise tentatively knocked on the door even though she knew he was expecting her, awaiting his, “Come on in little Lou-Lou!” before opening it. He’s perched on the end of his bed when she walks in, her feet sinking into his soft, still new-feeling, thick white carpet, and he opens his arms to her. She practically throws herself into them and is immediately rewarded by him pulling her tight to him, his arms folding around her back, clutching her close. She couldn’t break away further than an inch if she wanted to, not that she did. She contented herself nosing at his neck, before one of his hands strayed up to rest on her cheek, turning her face to his, before falling down to her neck, fingers splayed up to her chin. She tips her head up, meeting his eyes and he winks before ducking his own head down to meet hers. It’s at once far more involved than the last time they’d kissed. This time he’s kissing her like he’s hungry for it and he pulls away, briefly, with a tug to her bottom lip,  

“God - I missed ya, baby,” before clutching her face close again. Louise feels like her body is burning from the inside out, can feel the heat building and starting to radiate off her, and Elvis’ arm clenches around her, stilling her movements as she practically bucks against him. She just melts, his arm the only thing really holding her up as she willingly goes along with her devourment. He laughs, his fingers grazing her waist, as she gasps for a breath, her eyes still closed, “You’re so pretty.” Her eyes flutter open in disbelief, unable to believe, even having heard it herself, that Elvis was telling her she was pretty. She gathered her strength to place her wobbly arms around his neck, murmuring back to him, “No, you’re the pretty one, gosh you’re gorgeous, you look so good,” as she presses little kisses all over his cheeks and face. He reciprocates, and she manages to keep her eyes open, watching him at impossibly close range. He ends by pressing a kiss to her mouth again, and this time Louise pushes herself against him so hard that they go tumbling down onto the bed. She giggles, looking around at the blue walls, but Elvis quickly regains her attention, caging her in under him and capturing her mouth with his again. She relaxes into him - completely at ease and trusting.

By the time they make their way back downstairs, Louise was dazed, and her lips bitten sore, and she was pleased to notice Elvis’ looked the same - a little zing of possessiveness sent straight up her spine. Yes; she mussed his hair up to look like that. His lips are rosy and plumped because of her. She misses everyone’s first looks, coming in behind Elvis, and though he doesn’t announce what they’ d been up to she can feel their knowing eyes, and she resigns herself to having to field questions on the nature of her relationship with Elvis.  

Elvis immediately situated himself back on the couch, patting the space next to him.  

 “C’mon little girl, come sit next to me.” Louise writhes a little, her face echoing her jumbled internal thoughts. 

“What? C’mon, what’s the matter? Cat got your tongue?” He teases, eyebrow rising and Louise is quick to walk over to him, anxious for him not to change his mind despite her annoyance. He grabs her wrist before she can sit down, tugging her to stand in front of him. “You don’t wanna sit with me now?” She thinks, but doesn’t say, ‘well, no. because you’re holding me upright.’  

“No, no, I do. I just, I know you don’t mean it in this way, but it’s just…well, Elvis - you’re not that much older than me, and it feels like sometimes you’re, - “She pauses, unsure how to put it, his gaze hardens,  

“I’m what?”  

“Like you’re, oh I don’t know Elvis!” He doesn’t let go, and he doesn’t respond, just waiting her out. “Well. You just don’t needta call me little all the damn time.” His brow furrows as he tries to work out what’s referring to,  

“What? I can’t call you little girl?” He scoffs, “I don’t mean nothing by it. Jus what you are s’all.”  

“Elvis.” She pouts, and he grins, pulling her closer, pressing his palms to her cheeks,  

“Just my itty-bitty baby girl.” She groans, annoyed he wasn’t taking her seriously, and stomps her foot. He cackles in response, drawing back.  

“See, what did I tell ya boys - She’s just a baby.” He says it with a sneer, and it suddenly doesn’t feel like kind-hearted teasing anymore. Louise can rapidly feel tears of frustration blurring her vision, frustrated at the situation, and at how it’s impossible to argue she’s not a baby when she’s crying at everything. Elvis frowns. “Oh, honey, there’s no need fo-” But they don’t stop coming, and he watches almost forlorn himself as a fat, salty teardrop slides down her cheek. He sighs, “C’mere with me.” He drags her out of the room away from the others and pulls her along all the way back up to his bathroom, “C’mon, here we go,” He picks her up to balance her on the vanity while she sniffles.  

“So-rry,” She manages to get out, while he gently wipes at her eyes with his thumbs, “Didn’t mean to, I know you were playing.” He smiles, eyes almost pleading, crinkling just the tiniest amount around the corners,  

“Thought you were gonna fight it out with me. I wasn’t expecting the waterworks, but I guess, well I guess, you’re jus’ a little over-emot’onal huh, darling?” He kisses the tears away, teardrop clinging to his lip as she struggles to compose herself. “Will you still come back tomorrow?” The question startles Louise enough for her to stop the tears,  

“Of course! Whenever you want me too.” Elvis brushes his hand through his hair, shoving some of it back into place.  

“Honey, I want you here all the time. Even when you’re bein’ silly.” He taps her nose and Louise giggles again. “Look, I think someone here is tired, so how’s abouts I drop you home?”  

Louise blinks back at him, the offer almost unheard of, “You want to?” He nods, his hair flopping back into disarray,  

“Yeah-huh, let’s wash your face, huh honey? And then I’ll take you home. Tuck my baby in for the night.” Louise blushes, this was exactly the kind of comment she’d just been protesting, and yet now it was making her head feel fuzzy and her tummy flip with anticipation. Elvis shifts his weight as he cocks a hip, holding his hand out for her hold for balance as she hops off the sink and as the sturdy weight of his fingers sink into hers Louise decides it’s not an argument that she has any desire to win.

#elvis presley fanfiction #be-my-ally #elvis x oc #elvis fanfic #splashing around

[small-sinclair]

Hi! I love your writing and I had an idea

So, imagine Bo x reader where they get into an argument. (It's over something stupid, they were both mad for different reasons and it just happens) or something like that and then No goes to his shop to find that his S/O organized all his tools and labeled the drawers?

(I like organizing when I'm stressed so this is very self projection)

Thank you for reading my request and I hope you have a great day/night,

PhantomCat 💜

I feel this. I clean like a mad man durning a mental breakdown.

Anyways,

The Organizer

Bo x gn!reader

After a 3 hour fight, you storm out of the house, living Bo to his own anger.

Honestly, he thought that was it: you’re leaving him. And that made him more pissed.

Bo comes to his shop after destroying the garage by the house. Maybe fixing a car would help him?

As he enters, he’s shocked to see a neatly cleaned front area. Magazine’s organized by size and thickness, chairs from cleanest to dirtiest, floor swept and May cleaned, and register polished.

In the shop, Bo sees you by the lose screw box and bolts, your hands moving items into piles.

In front of you, he sees the wall of tools in different sizes, thicknesses, and usages.

Then he saw the drawers, they’re closed. He’s never seen them closed before! Labels and lists of tools outside on tape…

Then he sees in the center side a polaroid selfie of him kissing your cheek. You’re smiling in that one.

On the white under the photo, it reads in a dark blue:

“Forever Yours❤️”

Bo couldn’t help but blush. You were so mad that you cleaned his shop and organized his shop.

He leans against the shop and asked, “Ya ain’t mad at me now, are ya, darlin’?”

You don’t answer him as you finished the organization. You spare him a glance.

So, he moves. His boots click on the cement until he stands behind you. He wraps his arms around your waste and leaned on you. “Sweetheart? Talk to me.”

“I thought you hated me and wished me dead, cowboy.” You huffed, “Because that wasn’t nice.”

He nuzzled into your neck as he watched your hands organize the sizes of the screws and bolts. “Didn’t mean it. Was mad ‘bout somethin’ else.”

Then he’ll lay his kisses on thick to show he means it, that he’s sorry for everything. His words haunt him as he laid on every apology.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers deeply. “Truly.”

You finished organizing the screws and bolts and placed them in little dishes. “Okay… I forgive you, Bo.”

“I gotta get ya more mad if ‘at means you’ll organize shit.”

“Don’t push it, lover boy.”

He turns you and gives a sweet kiss. “Dance wit’ me, honey?” He kisses you again. “Le’me prove it?”

You roll your eyes but end up dancing in the shop light to a slow song on the radio.

Maybe you’ll find time to organize his heart, he wonders. Organize his hate and throw out his anger along with the little scraps your found.

Until then, he’ll hope you stay in his arms and forgive him every time, everyday.

…

…you didn’t heart to tell him that you also color organized his screwdriver handles, hammers, knives, car parts, and oil rags.

#bo sinclair #house of wax #house of wax 2005 #house of wax (2005) #house of wax fanfiction #house of wax fanfic #bo sinclair x reader #bo sinclair x gn reader #bo sinclair fanfic #bo sinclair house of wax #bo sinclair fluff #bo sinclair x you #bo sinclair x y/n

[cowboydisaster]

The Fire In Your Eyes

part XII: Clemens Point i

pairing: Arthur Morgan x fem reader

word count: 12.2k

summary: Having had a few weeks to adjust to the new camp, you're itching to get out. The cure to your cabin fever ends up being a rather troublesome trip to Rhodes with Arthur and Sadie. You and arthur are interrupted when Hosea invites you to a fishing trip, and the trip itself proves to be more trouble than you had planned.

a/n: I'm back! Most of you know that my dog had an emergency vet visit last Wednesday, and he ended up going under. He's doing much better now, thank you to everyone for all your kind thoughts and wishes for him. Sorry for the delay in posting!

warnings: graphic violence, brief sexual themes

beta read by @margowritesthings

series extras

SERIES MASTERPOST

Water laps at the shoreline, running over your boots as you walk through the grassy sand. Arthur is by your side, leading you in the direction of camp. It’s been a busy week, and you find these little walks along the lake a perfect distraction from the madness of the new camp. It’s been nothing but chores, and you haven’t even gotten the chance to venture out into town yet. You're going stir crazy, and the lake seems to be your only escape. 

Arthur started joining you soon after he picked up on the habit, and now sometimes you’ll go out for hours, getting lost in conversation while sitting in the grass. He'd gone out with you early in the morning, and you're just making your way back now.

“Likin’ the new camp?” Arthur asks. Your eyes are on the sand, watching how it shifts under your boots with each step. 

“Yeah, actually, I do. It’s nice bein’ by the water.” You hum, watching the sun rise over the lake. 

“Ain’t the heat buggin’ you?” Arthur chuckles, and you smile, glancing over at him. Even in the early morning hour, beads of sweat cling to his forehead, soaking through some spots on his shirt. He’s always  warm, it’s no wonder this heat is miserable for him. 

“No, I enjoy it.” You admit, basking in the warm sun. You’ll take the warmth over the cold any day, especially after Colter.

The heat is not the only change that moving south has brought about. The dirt roads have an oddly orange-red hue, the trees have changed from oaks and pines to mangroves and bald cypresses, even the people have changed. From what you’ve heard, this is a more dangerous place to be. People are less understanding, and some are even stuck in their heads, acting like it’s the 40s. Stupid bastards. There are pros and cons, but really, you’re just glad to be away from the Pinkertons. 

“Don’t you like it?” You ask him, looking up at Arthur as the two of you walk the shore. He cocks his head in thought. 

“I don't know. It ain't the same, I guess.” Arthur hums, and you nod. You know he really enjoyed the nature in New Hanover. He was frequently sketching the wildlife and the cliffs. You reckon he’ll find that passion here too, he just hasn’t seen all the beauty Lemoyne has to offer yet.

“Lots of memories in Horseshoe.” Arthur sighs. 

“That there are.” You agree quietly. You walk side by side for a while, soaking in the sun, enjoying the sounds of Flat Iron Lake. It's a beautiful morning spent together, and you try to soak in as much as you can. 

“We outta go to the fence, cash in those gold bars.” Arthur says, and you perk up at the thought. Not only are you excited for the money, you want to get out of camp. 

“Is there one around here?” You ask, looking up at Arthur. The morning sun is casting him in a bright orange glow as he rubs at the stubble on his chin, thinking of any acquaintances that might know of a fence. 

“Probably. There’s a town nearby called Rhodes. I reckon there's a fence there. If not, Emerald Ranch ain’t too far.” 

You approach the outskirts of camp, and you can hear the stomping before you even see her. 

“You!” Grimshaw hisses, stomping from her bedroll. Arthur shoots you a pitiful look as Grimshaw grabs your arm tightly and drags you back into camp, “Quit lollygaggin! And Mr. Morgan, stop distractin’ her!” Ms. Grimshaw yells. 

“Sorry Ms. Grimshaw." You whisper, hurrying behind her as she pulls you along. 

“At least you have manners. Now there’s laundry to be done, so get to it.” Grimshaw yells, shoving you towards the bins of lye and water where the other girls are. You fight the urge to call her an old bitch, instead opting to curse under your breath. 

The girls are sitting on a blanket around the bins of water, lye and clothes., and you take a seat at the washing station. Looking up, you're met with a bittersweet glance from Arthur, before he parts and starts on his own daily tasks. 

"We've missed you!" Marybeth calls, smiling brightly as she sits beside you with her wash rack and pail. 

"Yeah, we never see you anymore! Too good for us now? A high society lady like Molly?" Karen chastises, and you glance across camp to the red-haired woman, filing her nails on Dutch's cot.

"What?" You ask, not understanding how they could possibly equate you to Molly. You listen on, taking one of Jack’s shirts from the pile and rinsing it in the lye mix. 

"We ain't stupid!" Karen laughs loudly. You still don't understand, and you shake your head, eyebrows pulled together. Marybeth leans forward, biting her lip with a juicy piece of gossip on her tongue. 

"We see him goin' in your tent at night." Marybeth whispers, pulling away to squeal excitedly. Karen laughs, winking at you. 

Immediately your face falls– this is exactly why it was meant to be kept quiet. 

"It ain't what it looks like." You bite. 

"What? So you're not laying with Dutch's right hand man?" Karen teases. 

"Karen." Tilly warns from beside you, speaking up to stop the girl from embarrassing you or herself. But unsurprisingly, Karen doesn't listen.

"It's not just– it ain't like that." You huff, shaking your head, "Sides, what business is it of yours?" You snap. 

Karen goes quiet for a moment, but you see the crack of a smile on her lips as you continue working dirt stains out of Jack's shirt. 

 "So… you are havin' a tiff with him!" Karen points out, "When can we expect little Morgans runnin' around?" She snorts, and Marybeth covers her mouth to stop herself from cracking up.

"Leave it." You hiss. Karen and Marybeth take the hint, backing away from your bite as their giggles die down. 

"I'm sorry. It's just… nothing ever happens in camp– nothin' good anyway, nothin like this." Marybeth explains. 

You understand, you do. But this is something new, good and intimate between you and Arthur and you don't want it gossiped over or turned into something it's not. 

"I never meant to upset you, Star, really… Here, let me do your hair. Grimshaw ain't lookin." Marybeth says. Her tone is back to hushed and sweet instead of teasing. 

You nod, placing down your things before sitting down on the ground. Marybeth sits behind you, intertwining her fingers into your hair. She starts a braid at the back of your head, leaving a few loose pieces hanging down to frame your face. 

"Do you love him?" Marybeth asks you quietly and you huff. 

"I feel like a lot of people been askin' me that." You sigh, "I– It's all new." You excuse, knowing that you absolutely do love him, more than anything. And that little fact terrifies you.

"Is he good in the sack?" Karen asks. 

"Now, come on, Karen. That's no question to ask." Tilly stands up for you, raising her eyebrows at Karen until she backs off, "And Marybeth, this isn't a romance novel. Both of you, leave the poor girl be." 

It grows quiet as Marybeth pulls your hair into a loose braid. You flick the rowel of your spur, watching it spin a few times as you think. 

"This is the only reason I wanted to keep it quiet. Especially with Micah comin' back any day, and how some of the boys are. This is special, and I don't want it spoiled by the likes of the men in this camp. Usually I'd just start hittin 'em but I can't afford to be on Dutch's bad side right now." You admit. 

"My lips are sealed." Marybeth says at your back and you turn your head to the side, nodding. 

"Of course, we won't say anything." Karen adds, dipping a shirt into the soapy water. 

Marybeth ties the bottom of your braid off with a red ribbon, making a little bow with the fabric. 

"Flowers?" Marybeth asks hopefully, holding up a little woven basket of stemless flowers that she'd plucked from the new camp's surrounding woods. 

"Sure." You hum, looking back to sift through the basket. You're wearing a black shirt, and the red contrasts nicely, so you pull out a few crimson colored geranium petals and hand them to her. 

"Good choice." Tilly smiles, seeing the way you match perfectly. 

"We oughta get you some red lipstick!" Karen hoots, and you chuckle. 

"I don't need no damn lipstick." You smirk as Marybeth places the petals in between the woven hair of your braid.

"Yeah, cause it'll end up on Arthur's lips anyhow!" Marybeth snickers, and you reach behind you to smack her knee. 

"Hush up." You bite playfully, shaking your head at their banter. 

"Uh, what is goin' on over there?" Karen asks. You glance up from your lap, eyes scanning around the camp for the apparent disturbance. 

You lock onto the fight happening behind Pearson's table, eyes going wide. Marybeth's hands still in your hair as everyone watches on. Sadie and Pearson had been chopping vegetables for the night's stews but now their knives are up and pointed at each other. They're about to go at each other's throats, yelling at eachother with heated looks. Just as you're about to stand up and stop the apparent fight, Arthur stomps over, placing himself between the pair of fools. 

"What is wrong with you two?!" Arthur tells, shoving them apart. Sadie practically snarls, her knife still pointed in Pearson's direction. 

"I ain't choppin' vegetables for a livin'!" She yells from across camp, and Tilly huffs from behind you. 

"Get used to it." Karen bites quietly. 

Arthur nearly laughs at her statement, putting his hands on his belt. 

"Oh, I'm sorry madam, was there insufficient feathers in your pillow?" He asks sarcastically, taking a step towards Sadie so that she can see the annoyance playing out on his face. 

Marybeth puts a few more flowers into your braid before you turn and thank her quietly, standing up to help ease the situation. At least in Colter, Sadie trusted you. Though you haven't really seen her since then, she's been a shell, until now. 

“Look, I ain’t lazy, Mr. Morgan. I'll work, but not this.” Sadie says, her voice coming down a notch as you approach Arthur, standing by his side. 

“Well ain’t cookin work?” Arthur huffs, perplexed by the idea of Sadie picking and choosing what she does and doesn’t want to do. Sadie ignores Arthur’s question, and her eyes flicker to you as she scans you up and down. 

“She gets to run with the men.” Sadie points out in a hiss, her finger pointing at you before she looks back to Arthur with crossed arms, waiting for an explanation. 

“I want in.” She growls, “If you leave me here with this fat old coot for another second I’ll skin him and serve him.” Sadie hisses, raising her knife back up to Pearson. Pearson scowls as he steps forward, enraged.

“Watch your mouth, you crazy goddamn fishwife!!” Pearson roars, and Sadie lunges at him. You grab Sadie by the waist, pushing her back away from Pearson. Arthur puts his arm out, stopping Pearson. 

“Enough!” Arthur roars, putting an end to the childlike argument. 

“You want to run with the men?” You ask, stepping up to Sadie, “Then let’s go.” Your voice is irritated. Running out on jobs isn't fun. Sure, you have more freedom, but you’ve nearly died and lost the people you love more times than you can count. 

“Wait–” Arthur protests, but you raise your hand, stopping him. 

“No. If she wants to go out, let her. She wants to get shot at, she wants to kill? Let her. I ain’t stoppin’ her.” You say, irritation thick in your voice at the prospect of wanting to be an outlaw. 

“I don’t know.” Arthur shakes his head, worried that something might go wrong. Sadie rolls her eyes, pointing her knife towards you. It’s not a threat, just an extension of her hand as she addresses Arthur. 

“Did you ever question her this much? Jesus.” Sadie asks. Arthur rests his hands on his gun belt, leaning back. 

“No, I didn’t. But she was runnin’ from the law before I even knew her.” Arthur explains, and Sadie glances to you, seeing you in a new light. 

“Let's go then, prove yourself if that's what you wanna do.” You hum, looking up and down at Sadie. You know that she has what it takes, but regardless, you think she’s crazy for wanting to go out. Arthur cocks his head, going with your plan. 

“Alright then, Mr. Pearson, do you need anything while we’re out?” Arthur asks, and Pearson steps forward, pulling a folded up piece of paper from his dirty apron. He extends the paper out to Arthur before reaching back into his apron and bringing out a wad of cash and an envelope. 

“Here’s the grocery list, and could you mail this letter for me?” Pearson asks, and Arthur nods. 

“Sure.” Arthur says, gesturing towards the wagon on the outskirts of camp as he looks back at you both, “Ladies.” He invites you to go first. 

“I’ll take the back.” Sadie says, eagerly jogging towards the wagon as you fall into step with Arthur. Arthur puts all of Pearson’s items into his satchel as he walks towards the wagon with you. 

“She is somethin’ else.” You whisper, chuckling. 

Arthur holds his hand out to help you climb onto the wagon, and you take it as you step up. You take the front seat, sitting down just before Arthur climbs in beside you. 

Your head snaps up as you hear yelling from across the camp. It’s Dutch, hollering over to you three. 

“Arthur! No fighting in Rhodes. I don’t want a single weapon leaving its holster, understand? We are lying low!” Dutch yells, and you roll your eyes. 

“Like we laid low in Valentine?” You snap under your breath, and Sadie snorts. Arthur nods to Dutch, taking his instruction before glancing back at you.

“He’s– he’s tryin’, Star.” Arthur defends Dutch, flicking the reins over the horse backs as he drives you out of Clemen’s Point. You know it’s a sensitive subject for Arthur, so you gently place your hand on his knee for comfort, voice hushed to a whisper. 

“I know he is.” You say quietly, reassuring Arthur. It’s not an easy thing for Arthur to realize that Dutch is losing it, you’ll give him all the time he needs. 

Arthur looks over to you with a small smile. 

“You look real pretty with them flowers in your hair.” Arthur compliments quietly, and your hand moves to intertwine with his own on the wagon bench in between you both. 

“Thank you.” You hum. 

Sadie sits in the back of the wagon, trying not to eavesdrop. The conversation causes the constant ache in her chest to hurt a little more, and she finds herself looking for a distraction to numb the pain. 

“Where’s that letter?” Sadie asks, and Arthur huffs, shaking his head. The wagon breaks from the trees as you enter Scarlett Meadows, driving over the orange tinted roads towards town. 

“Oh, you’re reading his mail now?” Arthur chides. 

“What are you doin–?” Arthur huffs as you let go of his hand, reaching over him to dig through his satchel. 

“Star–” Arthur grumbles, amused and surprised as you pull the envelope from his satchel. 

“Read it out loud, I wanna hear this.” Sadie chuckles. You take the crisp white envelope, breaking the seal with your nail before pulling out the letter. Arthur shakes his head, chuckling as you clear your throat. 

“Dear aunt Cathy, I haven’t heard from you in some time… blah blah blah.” Your eyes scan over the page until you find a particularly interesting paragraph and you pause, reading it, “I am yet to take a wife, but it is not for a lack of suitors!”

Arthur laughs out loud, a hearty boisterous sound as you and Sadie chuckle. 

“Has he ever even talked  to a woman he ain’t paid for?” Sadie asks, lungs aching from her laughter. Your finger follows the line of words as you try to focus, ignoring the bumpy drive. 

“Oh– there’s more!” You chime, eyes focusing back on the letter, “The group that I travel with has picked up two women since I last wrote, and they both court me….”

You pause, eyebrows pulling together as you continue, “Both are too fierce-tempered for my tastes, but nothing that can’t be worked out…”

Sadie leans up behind you in the wagon, glancing over your shoulder at the pages to ensure she’s heard you correctly. Arthur is far too quiet for your liking. 

“Is he talking about us?” Sadie asks, eyes running over the letter.

“He has to be…” You whisper, feeling uneasy at the thought, “That’s… disgusting.” You admit, shivering at the thought of being courted by Pearson. 

“Put that away. I don’t wanna hear it no more.” Arthur grumbles, a dull rage bubbling up in his chest at the idea of someone else bragging about being courted by you. He knows it’s bullshit, and he knows that you’ll deal with Pearson if he doesn’t. 

“I reckon I don't either.” Sadie growls as Arthur takes the wagon over the train tracks. 

“I’ll deal with him later.” You shake your head. 

It grows quiet as you roll on, stuffing the letter back into the envelope. You place it down on the bench seat, intertwining your fingers back through Arthur’s. Instantly he relaxes, shoulders losing their tense state at your touch, and you can hear the breath that he releases. You have a way of calming him down. 

“So Rhodes, what’s it like?” Sadie asks, looking ahead to the buildings she can see. 

“It’s a decent town, I've only been here once or twice n’ that was years ago.” Arthur says, rounding the bend towards the saloon. 

“The people leave somethin’ to be desired.” Arthur grumbles, a sour taste in his mouth. 

The wagon rolls on, going past the saloon until Arthur pulls the horses alongside the general store. He grabs the letter from the bench and hops down from the wagon before stretching a hand up to help you down. 

“Alright, why don’t the two of you grab what we need from the store, I’ll go send this damn letter– and remember, no guns.” Arthur adds, handing you the list and money before grumpily storming off towards the post office. You and Sadie watch him go for a few moments before she turns to you with a raised eyebrow. 

“Well, he’s no fun.” She sighs, tapping her holster before walking towards the general store doors. 

“We can still have fun without guns. We’ll have them load up the wagon, and we’ll go drinkin’.” You hum. 

Sadie pushes the door open, stepping straight up to the shopkeeper. 

“Ladies, how can I help y’all?” He asks, a big blonde mustache hiding his smile from you. You follow Sadie, placing the list down on the counter. 

“We need all these items loaded into our wagon.” You chime, pointing through the window to your wagon. The shopkeep nods, picking up the list and giving it a onceover. 

“Sure thing, miss, shouldn’t be a problem.” 

Sadie looks you up and down, eyeing your outfit. Then without a word, she walks to the clothing section, sifting through the mens clothes until she finds small enough sizes. She picks out a plaid yellow shirt, a pair of jeans and cowboy boots before walking over and slamming them down on the counter. 

“Add these to the tab, where can I change?” Sadie hisses at the poor shopkeeper. He points behind him to the inventory room. 

“Well I got a room back here, but it ain’t for customers–” He begins, but Sadie is already behind the counter, striding into the room. You can hear the fabric of Sadie’s dress tearing, and when she comes back out, dressed in a similar style to you, the dress is left behind on the ground. 

“Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.” She chuckles, gesturing to the fact that both of you are wearing men’s clothes. They’re more comfortable, breathable and easy to wear… You hate the curious, and often rude, glares you get, but it’s worth it in the end. 

“This should be more than enough, just go ahead and load it all up, please.” You say, leaving the billfold down on the counter. 

“Thank you both!” The man says, sounding a little confused. He glances at the destroyed dress on the floor of his inventory room as you and Sadie exit through the front door. 

“To the saloon.” You smile, walking up the slope towards the Rhodes Parlor House. You can hear the music before you reach the doors. 

You place a hand on each door, pushing them open theatrically as you step inside. Sadie follows suit, walking up to the bar with you. The bartender is polishing glasses and setting them up on the bar. A few patrons line the bar, and you slide in beside a finely dressed man, leaving enough room for Sadie to stand beside you. A pianist plays music on the other end of the saloon, and you hum along before flagging down the bartender. 

“A whiskey.” You order, looking to Sadie for her preferred poison. 

“Make it two.” 

The bartender nods, reaching under the bar to pull out a sparkling bottle of Tennessee whiskey. He pours two shots before sliding them across the bar to you, and you toss a dollar onto the counter.

“Watch this, it’s how I met Arthur– a sort of specialty.” You smirk, downing your whiskey before turning to the man beside you. He’s dressed in an expensive outfit, with many pieces. 

“Excuse me mister?” You chime, and the man turns towards you. He’s clearly intoxicated, a drunken smile stretches across his face as his eyes fall onto you. 

“I'm new to these parts, sir. Do you happen to know where I can buy some sugar? They was out at the store, and I was planning on making my famous apple pie.” You smile sweetly, faking an innocent demeanor, but your fingers are slipping closer to the pocket of his jeans. You keep eye contact to distract him as your hand slides right into his pocket. 

“Oh! Well, miss, I don’t know–” he hiccups, “Maybe ask the store if there’s any in the back!” The man says, smiling brilliantly down at you. 

“Them flowers in your hair are real beautiful, miss.” The man smiles, and you bite back a remark as you smile, gripping onto something papery in his pocket and pulling it out. You shove it into your pocket, eyes scanning over the man. 

“Thank you.” You hum, seeing a lump in the pocket to his vest. The man turns back to the bar, but you grip his arm.

“This is such a nice vest! Where ever did you get it? My husband would suit one so well.” You smile, hand running over the front of his vest to feel the fine material, and a pocket watch right in his vest pocket. 

“The tailor in Saint Denis! He’s a great feller. He’ll have your husband lookin’ sharp.” You thank the man, waiting for him to turn away from you and face the bar again. Through your peripherals, you watch as he looks away, and you quickly snake your supple fingers into his vest pocket, pulling the chain until a huge platinum pocket watch slips out. He’s too drunk to notice, and you slide it into your satchel before turning back to Sadie. 

“Well, shit.” She chuckles, “You pickpocketed Arthur? That’s how you got wrapped up in this?” She whispers, just loud enough for you to hear. You nod, and Sadie shakes her head. 

“I like you.” She chuckles as you both make your way towards the saloon doors, escaping before the man realizes that you’ve stolen from him. 

Just as you approach the door, it swings open and a group of greasy, dirty men stomp through. One of them knocks right into your shoulder, and trips you. You fall to the floor with a gasp, knees and hands hitting the ground harshly. Pain shoots up through your limbs as you turn to glare at the bastard. Sadie reaches for her holster, but you stand up, gripping her arm to stop her.

“Watch where you walk, bitch.” The man spits out through only a handful of teeth. You glare daggers at him, breaking eye contact only as he steps up towards the bar.

“We’s the Lemoyne Raiders! And this fine establishment owes us a tax!” He yells, and all the men unholster their weapons. 

“Go, quickly, go.” You whisper to Sadie, shoving her out the door. You run down the slope towards the wagon, seeing Arthur leaning against it. 

“Where the hell have you two been?!” Arthur growls, but you ignore him, jumping into the wagon. 

“Drive!” You yell, and Arthur looks around before sighing and clambering into the driver's seat. Sadie jumps into the back of the wagon just as Arthur slaps the reins over the horses’ backs. 

“What did you two do?” Arthur growls, driving the horses quickly out of town. 

“It wasn’t us. A gang of fellas came in and started demanding a tax, knocked me to the damn ground.” You sigh. 

“We needed to get out of there before it got violent, I wasn’t about to go against Dutch’s orders on my first outing.” Sadie adds. Arthur looks over at you, scanning the dirt scuffed on your knees and the scrape on the palms of your hands. 

“They hurt you?” He asks, and you shake your head. 

“I'm alright.” You reassure him, mind wandering back, “They call themselves the Lemoyne Raiders, just make sure everyone knows to keep an eye out.” You say as Arthur pushes the horses closer to home. 

Wild boar squeal, running in all directions as Arthur speeds through the meadows, trying to get home. You reach into your pocket, pulling out the cash you’d stolen. You count the bills, eyebrows popping up. 

“We made fifty bucks." You hum, counting out twenty five and handing it back to her. Arthur does a double take, looking back to see you going through the money. 

“Aw, hell. What did you two do? How did you get that?” Arthur mumbles, sighing as you chuckle. 

“Star here has quite the talent when it comes to pickin’ unsuspecting pockets.” Sadie laughs as the wagon pulls through the trees. 

Arthur looks over at you sighing. 

"Dutch said no trouble." He huffs, and you dangle the platinum pocket watch from your hand, showing it to him. 

"He said no guns." You correct, "and I didn't use any guns." 

"Don't mention this to Dutch. We just get the supplies back and that's that." Arthur orders, softening his tongue as he looks over his shoulder, "You two handled yourselves well today." 

You glance back at Sadie with a smirk, proud of yourself and her. Your intuition was right, she can handle herself just fine, and she'll make a nice addition to the working members of the gang. You look forward to riding out with her in the future. 

"Don't you worry, our lips are sealed." Sadie huffs, rolling her eyes lightly. 

Arthur pulls the wagon through the trees towards Clemens Point, slowing down as he enters camp. He pulls the wagon near Pearson's table, and a few of the boys come to help unload it. 

“I’ll see you around.” You smile at Sadie, and she tips her hat to you before jumping down from the wagon.

"Star, take the horses." Arthur calls to you, untying them from the wagon before handing you their reins. You take the reins of the two bay Shires, noting the white sweat that clings to their fur and the hot, heavy breaths that they take. Arthur had really pushed them to get back quickly, leaving them tired and sore. The horses walk with you, whinnying and nudging your pockets for treats as you take them to the hitching posts. 

It doesn't take long for you to hitch them and grab two pails of water from the lake. You place the buckets down, glancing to where Arthur stands in the wagon, handing boxes down to Charles on the ground. You watch for a moment, distracted by the way his muscles flex under his shirt. He smiles, laughing at something one of the boys said and you feel a shiver run down your spine. You pick up the metal pail of water, pouring it over the stallions back. The water cascades down, washing away the sweat and cooling down the shire. You shake your head, pulling your eyes away from Arthur to focus on the horses. 

You're not sure what's gotten into you but he's so distracting, you can't take it. He pushes the sleeves of his shirt up, exposing his thick, muscular forearms as he wipes some sweat from his brow. You burn as your eyes watch his suspenders flex and move with his shoulders, and you curse yourself for being so filthy.

You can't help it. It's been a week since he's touched you. With the move and everything going on in camp, there's been no time for it. 

You quickly pour water over the second shire horse, making sure that her breathing has calmed back down. Her nostrils are no longer flared, and all the puffy white sweat has been washed from her sides. You double check that there is hay and water in their trough before patting both horses and walking back into camp. 

Arthur jumps down from the wagon as you approach, adjusting his hat with a smile. 

"Horses okay?" Arthur asks, hoping that he hadn't pushed them too hard. You nod, walking towards your tent, subconsciously leading him there. 

"Yeah, they're just fine. Gave them some water n' got them cooled down." You say, gripping Arthur’s  arm. 

“We have some time, right?” You ask, watching as Arthur’s eyebrows pull together and he pulls his pocket watch from his vest. He glances at the time before putting the fine watch back. 

“A little, why?” He asks, and you grip his arm impossibly tighter, pulling him through the canvas to your tent. 

“What’s goin’ on?” Arthur asks, worried until the canvas falls shut and you wrap your arms around his neck. Coyly, you pull him down to you, and his hands find your waist as you kiss him. A shiver runs down your spine, and you chase after the feelings he gives you as you moan into his mouth. 

“I’ve missed you, we’ve been so busy.” You explain, pulling away from his lips to speak. You’re breathless as you expose your neck, and he begins kissing the soft skin just under your jaw. 

“Missed you too.” He echoes, knowing exactly what you mean. It’s been too long since you’ve had each other like this.

"I'm supposed to be leavin' soon. I'm goin' fishin' with Hosea and Dutch." Arthur says, but his hands don't stop yours from unbuttoning his shirt, and his lips are still kissing your neck between words. 

"We'll be quick then." You murmur, tugging his shirt out of his jeans to reach the last few buttons. You pop them open, shoving his shirt to the ground before running your hands up the expanse of his chest.

And then his lips are on yours again, kissing you messily, quickly, as he rushes to pull your shirt off. You're short on time and it's been a week since he's touched you like this. You've both been too busy during the day, and exhausted during the night, but now you have a sliver of time and you'll be damned if it goes to waste. 

Arthur’s arms scoop under your thighs as he picks you up, and you wrap your legs around his waist. Your breaths turn to needy whimpers as he carries you towards the bed, lips never breaking contact on your skin. 

“What if someone hears?” You whisper as his lips kiss the fading dark spots on your collarbone. 

"No one will hear, we'll be quiet." He murmurs against your skin, nose nuzzled into the crook of your neck. You chuckle, feeling like a damn schoolgirl. 

Your smile falls quickly when three loud knocks sound out on the beam of your tent. 

"Star?" Hosea calls through the thin piece of canvas, just a step away from the scene you're making. 

Your skin turns pale as Arthur's lips pull away from your skin and immediately he loosens his grip on your thighs, letting you slide back down to the ground. Arthur quickly grabs his previously abandoned shirt from the ground, throwing it over his shoulders, unbuttoned, just as Hosea pulls the canvas to the side

"Dear girl, we're going fishing. I wanted to invite you–" Hosea starts, stopping in his tracks upon seeing Arthur in your tent. His eyes scan over the situation, and he sighs. 

"Arthur, get out." He calls to Arthur, "Get dressed and get out." 

Your cheeks burn red, feeling as if you're being scolded by a father for your carelessness. Arthur quickly starts dressing up the buttons to his shirt as you toy with your fingers. 

"You two are damn lucky it was just me coming in. There's things that need done, so save your foolin' around for later." Hosea bites, turning his attention to Arthur then, "Now, we are going fishing. Star, you can join us if you like, but you better be at the hitching posts in five minutes… and clean up, both of you." He snaps.

"Goddamn children." He whispers under his breath, shaking his head as he pulls the canvas shut behind him and heads off towards his own tent to grab his pole. You glance up to Arthur with a fierce blush on your face, still catching up from what's just happened

"Did we just… get caught?" You huff, not imagining that you'd ever be caught in the act at this point in your life. You're no teenager, but you sure as shit feel like one now.

"Red handed, darlin'." Arthur chuckles, hands undoing his belt just enough to tuck his shirt back into his jeans. You watch as he gets dressed, fixing the little pieces of his outfit that you've just worked so hard to undo. 

"You coming then…? Fishing?" Arthur asks, and you nod. 

"Might as well." You sigh, disappointed that your moment has been taken from you. 

“Hey,” Arthur calls, seeing the downcast look on your face. He grips your hand, pulling you to his chest, “Later, okay?” 

“Mhm.” You hum, a smile stretching across your face as he leans down to kiss you one more time. You lean up into him, pressing your lips to his before giving him entrance to your mouth. Arthur groans, wishing he had more time with you.

“C’mon then.” Arthur grumbles, pulling away from you. It’s clear that he’s going to be in a sour mood for the rest of the day thanks to Hosea, but you’ll try and cheer him up. You adjust your gun belt, blushing as you step outside the tent. You’re sure that someone heard Hosea’s scolding, but no one acknowledges it as you step out of your tent with Arthur. Dutch steps out of his tent as well, falling into step in front of you and Arthur.

“Are you joining us on this fine evening of fishing?” Dutch asks, neck craning to the side to speak to you. You nod. 

"It seems I am, though I never actually fished before. I went along once but… that time didn't turn out so good." You sigh, remembering the fishing trip with Jack back before everything happened. The Pinkertons had shown up, threatened you all, the train had happened, the massacre in Valentine, and here you are. 

"Well Hosea is a fine fisherman. He taught me everything I know about sinking worms. Arthur here, well he lacks skill and finesse, but we'll talk more on that later– I've got plenty of stories." Dutch chuckles deeply, hands resting on his gun belt as he leads you towards the hitching posts. 

"Great." Arthur sarcastically grumbles, looking up to where Hosea mixes herbs for his cough. 

"Hey old girl! Why don't you show us this creek you've been pissin' in?" Dutch hollers up, smiling brightly at Hosea. Hosea looks up, coughing lightly before abandoning his mixture and standing to meet you all. 

"Were they always like this?" You ask, chuckling at Dutch's pet name for Hosea. 

"It's gettin worse with old age." Arthur mumbles under his breath, hand on the small of your back as he leads to you the horses. 

"You don't look too rosy, old friend." Dutch says to Hosea as he mounts onto his white Arabian. The skittish horse swishes his tail nervously as Dutch adjusts in his saddle, gripping the reins tightly. 

"I'm afraid my days of lookin' good are long over." Hosea chuckles, coughing. It's a raspy sound, deep in his chest. You frown as you approach Athena, looking into her blue, sparkling eyes. 

"Hey there, girl." You coo, petting her neck. Arthur watches your interaction fondly, hiding a smile from behind Balius. 

"I know a good spot, up north along the bank." Hosea explains, groaning as he mounts up onto Silver Dollar. You and Arthur both climb into your saddles, and you fall into the back of a square formation. Dutch and Hosea rode side by side ahead of you while you and Arthur ride together behind them. 

"Why don't we just fish here?" Arthur asks, "We got a whole lake of 'em."

"Because I need to get out for a bit." Dutch's booming voice hollers back to you. You know exactly how he feels, and you're glad to be back out after being stuck in camp for so long.

"Me too." You hum, squeezing Athena into a canter behind Dutch and Hosea. They veer out of the trees, following the orange tinted roads towards Hosea's spot. 

"It's good to have the old guard together." Dutch calls out, a smile on his lips, "Just the three of us, like the old days– except for the addition of the beautiful Ms. Star."

You can feel Arthur's grip tighten on his reins, seeing the way his shoulders tense, but he keeps quiet. Dutch knows he's crossed another boundary, but he enjoys the rush. You roll your eyes as everyone keeps riding on. 

"Does Molly know you're callin' other women beautiful?" You bite, getting sick and tired of Dutch's games. He has no problem admitting that you're attractive, and yet he has no faith in you, and believes you to be the reason that the Pinkertons are on your tail. He's a messed up bastard, and you watch as he laughs boisterously. 

"What Molly doesn't know won't hurt her." Dutch says, and you look to Arthur with a shocked expression. Arthur looks like he wants to say something, and he opens his mouth to make a comment, but Hosea changes the topic before the conversation can continue to deteriorate.

"You did good finding this place, Arthur." Hosea calls back, thankfully changing the subject.

"It was more Star than me." Arthur explains, reaching into his satchel to pull out an oatcake. He extends his hand down to Balius, giving the shire horse a little snack for his work.

“It’s a good spot. I feel like I can breathe again, thick and soupy as this air is.” Dutch calls back, “Might even do your whistling pipes some good, Hosea.”

Hosea glances up at the sky, sighing as a bittersweet look crosses his face. He seems to be lost in a memory, and you watch on curiously until he speaks up. 

“I was once in this country with Bessie… Oh, it feels like a lifetime ago, now.” Hosea says. Dutch ignores the older man’s hurt, moving the topic forward. It must be hurtful, you think, to be run over by someone who used to be so close to you.  You can only imagine what Hosea and Arthur must be going through, watching Dutch slowly descend. Arthur won’t even admit it to himself, still too caught up in the past. It’ll take time, and you pity Arthur for the day he realizes. 

“It was a lifetime ago. But what a life we have lived, how we have fought.” Dutch’s eyes grow dark as he canters on, getting lost in his head, “But now, when we are desperate… we must stick to the plan.”

You roll your eyes. All Dutch ever talks about is his goddamn plan, but you’ve never even heard  it. 

“What exactly is your plan, Dutch?” You snap. His shoulders tighten at your attitude, but he doesn’t turn around to look at you. After a few moments, he finally speaks up. 

“My plan is to make money, and then escape somewhere that nobody will find us.” Dutch grits through a clenched jaw. You want to ask how in the hell that’s a good plan. ‘Make money and leave’ is extremely vague, and you’re not so sure that making money is such a good idea right now with how the past jobs have gone. You open your mouth to question him further, but Arthur sidepasses Balius closer to you and touches your thigh. The brush from his fingers pulls you back, and startled, you glance over to him. Arthur shakes his head no, signaling you to drop it. You want to protest, but he mouths the word ‘no’, sternly. 

Your face falls into a scowl as you continue on. You have to merge into single file as a wagon passes by, and you fall into the back of the line. You make a note to ask Arthur about it later. It bugs you that he asked you to stop. You have every right to question Dutch’s decisions when they directly affect your life, and the lives of your family. 

“These goddamn fools.” You whisper to Athena, leaning down to pet her neck. She tosses her head, seemingly agreeing with you. As you continue, Dutch slows The Count down to a trot. You move back up beside Arthur, watching as a train passes by and blocks the road. You’ll have to wait for it to pass. There is one wagon waiting at the crossroads, and you squint at it, noticing the metal bars that form a cell on the back of it.

“Law up ahead, play it cool.” Dutch says back to you all, tone hushed compared to his earlier bravado. You pull Athena back to a walk as you approach the wagon. There's a few people in the back, and you squint to see as you get closer and closer. 

“Hello gentleman, miss.” A voice calls meekly from the wagon cell. It's a familiar, accented voice, and when you search the wagon again you see Josiah Trelawny handcuffed in the cell amongst a group of other men. Your eyes go wide, and you sidepass Athena to lightly smack Arthur’s arm and get his attention. 

Everyone realizes the predicament, and Dutch glances back to you all before walking The Count up to the front of the wagon. There's two lawmen sitting on the drivers bench, and Dutch tips his hat to them.

“How are you boys?” Dutch asks, playing up his charisma. The man in the driver's spot has bloodshot eyes and a massive mustache. His blonde hair matches his pale face, and he seems a bit shaky in his arms. The man next to him is a bit younger, clean shaven with dark brown hair and a bowlers hat.

“We’re fine.” The driver exchanges, not feeding into whatever he believes Dutch to be inquiring about. Dutch isn’t about to walk away, and he is not about to be ignored again. So, he plays up his charisma again, picking an angle. 

“Some beautiful country you folks have here.” Dutch compliments, and this time the driver glances over to Dutch. He eyes him up and down quickly before looking back to the train ahead.

“We like it well enough.” The man says, still partially ignoring Dutch. Dutch smiles brightly, holding his hand up to his chest as he introduces himself. 

“Hoagy Macintosh, at your service.” Dutch introduces himself. You hold your hand over your mouth to hide your smirk as you snort a laugh, and Arthur lightly chastises you with a glare. You can see the smirk on his lips though, and you know he’s trying to hold back laughter just as much as you are. Hoagy Macintosh finally gets the lawman to open up and introduce himself and his deputy. 

“Leigh Gray, and this is my deputy, Archibald McGregor.” The sheriff introduces. Dutch smiles ear to ear, extending his hand up to shake the sheriffs. You almost laugh at the situation. A crook, wanted in three states, shaking the hand of the sheriff. 

“You a Scot?” Sheriff Gray asks, and Dutch grins. You’re growing bored of their banter, wishing you could just shoot the lock and run off with Trelawny instead of all this dancing around. 

“Partly,” Dutch leans in as if he’s about to tell some inside joke, “the best part.”

Your eyes roll back into your head again as you wait for the damn theatrics to end. 

“Can’t we just shoot the lock?” You whisper over to Arthur. He readjusts in his saddle, looking over at your impatience. 

“No. Just a few more minutes. Dutch has this.” Arthur whispers back to you. You watch on as the show continues, foot tapping against your stirrup. Even Athena is getting tired of standing, pawing at the ground in annoyance. Finally the train begins to move, going east.

“Tell me, sir, what did that silly, fancy fop back there do?” Dutch asks, pointing back at Trelawny. 

The conversation continues on for a while as you watch the prisoners in the back. Josiah is pressed tightly up against the cell like a cornered cat as the other, much bigger, men work on unlocking the door. One of them is picking the lock with something, cursing lightly as he fumbles with his wrists outstretched from the bars. 

“Uh… Arthur? Hosea?” You whisper, nodding towards the wagon door just as it swings open. 

“Oh, I wouldn’t do that if I were you!” Trelawny yells, extending his hand out from the wagon before pulling it back. He makes no move to escape as the three blonde haired men file out, pushing past Josiah and running towards the train. Trelawny gets the attention of the sheriff, who turns around and realizes that his convicts are escaping. 

“Shit! The Anderson boys! I can’t have more scandal!” Sheriff Gray yells, jumping down from the wagon. He takes his hat off, squeezing the felt between his hands as he tries to figure out a plan, watching as the Anderson boys all leap onto the caboose one at a time, pulling each other up.

“Well, allow us to help! Arthur, Star, take Archibald and go on.” Dutch orders. 

Archibald leaps down from the wagon, running up towards Athena. 

“Go on his horse! She don’t like men!” You yell to Archibald as Athena pins her ears and rears up lightly. The deputy runs towards Balius as you push Athena forward after the train. She was bred to race, and it doesn’t take long for you to catch up with the train. Her strides are long as she stretches them out in a gallop. You turn in your saddle to see Arthur a ways behind you. Poor big Balius was not made to run. 

“Jump up there, miss! This man rides like my grandma!” Archibald yells up and you laugh over all the noise as Arthur bites some comeback.

The train goes over a small bridge, and you run through the valley as you chase alongside it. There's a man running over the top of the train that you keep your eye on. When you reach the plains, and have a straight shot to jump, you slip your feet out of your stirrups and stand up in your saddle. It's difficult to balance, and you focus on not looking down as you leap onto the train. You land on a flat car, rolling as you hit the wood. You barely have time to stand up before a man knocks you back to the ground. He hits you like a brick wall, knocking you flat on your back as the train pushes forwards. 

You cross your arms over your face, blocking his swings until you find an opening. He falters for just a moment, and you knee him straight in the groin. The man screams out in pain, grabbing at his jeans as he falls down. You scramble up, kicking the toe of your boot straight to the man's forehead and knocking him out. 

You spin around as Arthur leaps from Balius and lands on the same cart as you. 

“I need Anders Anderson, he’s in the back!” Archibald yells, sliding up into the saddle, “I’m gonna go stop the train!” And then he takes off, galloping forward.

You extend your hand down to Arthur, helping him stand up as much as you can. 

“You okay?” Arthur asks as he stands. 

“I’m fine, let's go get this bastard.” You remark.

Arthur leads the way, running down the moving train car. It makes you dizzy, and bile rises in your throat that you force back down. Arthur leaps, grabbing the top of the next train car and pulling himself up. It takes everything in you to jump and reach the top, and your hand just barely grips the roof of the rail car before Arthur grabs it.

“Thank y–” You begin, cutting yourself off with a gasp as a man jumps up from the other side of the train and grapples Arthur. The man knocks him to the ground on his back, and Arthur’s head dangles over the side of the accelerating train.  You’re left to pull yourself up, and your arms strain painfully as you struggle to reach the top. Arthur’s hat falls off, plummeting down to the ground as the bastard wraps his big hands around Arthur’s neck and begins to squeeze the oxygen from his lungs. The panic of seeing Arthur struggle gives you enough adrenaline to pull yourself up. As soon as you’re on your feet, you grab him by the backs of his cotton suspenders and pull him back as hard as you can with a growl. He falls backwards off of Arthur, and rolls right off of the train. 

“Jesus.” Arthur coughs, clearing his throat as he watches the criminal fall and hit the ground. You peer over the side of the train, a shocked look on your face. 

“He should be fine.” You hum, snickering before you start jogging down the length of the rail car. Arthur is quick behind you with a smile on his lips. 

“Besides the broken ribs, sure!” He chuckles, playing up that famous Arthur Morgan sarcasm that you’ve grown so fond of. 

There's only one more car between you and Anders, and you jump to it, landing on your feet with a grunt as you push yourself to keep running. You glance up to the engine car, finding Archibald as he jumps from Balius onto the platform. 

At the top of the train car is another man, the only thing separating you from their leader. 

“I got this bastard!” Arthur yells, running past you to tackle the dark haired jailbreaker. Arthur’s fists immediately dig into the man’s ribs. Blood spatters as Arthur gives hard hits and blocks his face. He does a lot more damage than he takes. You watch them brawl, focusing on anything but the train's movement until Arthur pulls the bastard to the side of the roof and you can run past. The last car is some sort of meat cooler, and you jump down from the roof, landing ungracefully with a curse. 

“They sent a goddamn lady after me!” Anders laughs out loud, and your blood boils as you look up at him. His long blonde hair is pulled into a low ponytail, and his crystal blue eyes are cold and emotionless. He reminds you of Micah, and you grind your teeth, readying your fists for the beating they’re about to give.

 “You best turn around little girl… I ain’t goin’ back there without a fight.” Anders snarls. You take a few slow steps through the threshold, and then stumble slightly as the train screeches to a stop. Archibald must have gotten to the brakes. You hear Arthur’s blows landing behind you as you squint at the gang leader ahead of you. 

“Try me.” You bite. Anderson steps forward with every intention of knocking you out cold,  but he is too large and unagile for his own good. His movements are more sluggish than yours, and you have plenty of time to block his hit. He aims for a right hook to your cheek, but you pop your forearm up, blocking the hit as your right arm swings up into his gut. Anderson leans over with a groan, surprised by the force of your hit before he shakes it off. 

“Don’t kill him!” Archibald yells from outside. He distracts you, and Anderson lands a hard blow to your ribs. You hiss in pain, eyes flash dark at the man before you. 

“Why not?” You bark to Archibald, watching Anders sneer. Arthur is still fighting behind you, and when you hear a body fall from the train you instinctively panic and turn around. Relief floods your mind when you see Arthur wiping dirt on his jeans, spitting some blood down to the ground. He’s okay, and won the fight. 

“Star!” Arthur yells, eyes going wide. Your panic has completely sidetracked you and by the time you turn back around to Anders, it's nearly too late. “Star, he's got a knife!” Arthur yells, eyes wide as saucepans. 

Anders rams into you, knocking you flat on your back. He straddles your waist, shoving the knife down towards your throat as you fight against him. You yell out, fighting against his hands as the knife nearly knicks your throat. He's pushing it down with everything he can muster, just as you fight back. 

“Arthur!” You grit out through clenched teeth, begging for help as you fight for your life. Your legs kick out from under you as you attempt to get him off you. A big brown steel toed boot kicks directly into Anders’ head, knocking him out cold. 

“Goddamn bastard!” Arthur growls from above you as the knife clatters to the ground. You lay on the ground for a moment, catching your breath as you splay out. 

“You alright?” Arthur asks, kneeling to the ground beside you. His warm hands find your shoulders as he encourages you to sit up. 

“Fine. You?” You ask, wincing at the pain in your ribs. 

Arthur smiles. Even now, you’re always dismissing your own pain, too busy worrying about everyone else's. 

“Oh, I'm just fine, don’t you worry about me.” Arthur hums, taking your hands and looking at your bloodied knuckles. 

“I’ll patch these up as soon as we get home.” Arthur hums, more to himself than you. He knows that if he doesn’t, you won’t. He looks over your knuckles with a small frown, hoping that they don’t hurt as badly as they appear to. He saw you take a punch in the gut too, and he makes a note to check on it later. 

“You fought well.” He praises, and you smirk at the compliment. Then with a groan, he stands up, pulling you with him by your hand. Arthur leans down to pick up Anders, slinging him over his shoulder as if he’s only a sack of potatoes.

You exit the meat cart, walking down the two steps before jumping down into the dirt. Archibald is waiting there with your horses and a satisfied look on his face. 

“Go ahead and put him on your horse there and then we’ll head to Rhodes.” Archibald remarks, whistling for his own horse. 

“Great. Back to Rhodes.” You groan as Arthur throws Anders over Balius’s croup. 

“Hang on, I gotta go find my goddamn hat.” Arthur grumbles as everyone mounts up.

It’s not a long ride, but it sure as shit feels like one. Archibald doesn’t shut up the entire way there, and the only thing keeping you mildly entertained is Arthur’s thinning patience. The deputy explains some old feud that the entire town is wrapped up in– the Grays and the Braithwaites. One stole from the other, or something of the like, but it was so long ago that nobody really knows what happened. The hatred has been passed down through generations, and apparently everyone in Rhodes has picked a side. It makes your head hurt, thinking about the foolishness of the whole ordeal. By the time you arrive at the jail, you’re basically half slid out of your saddle, ready to hop down and get it over with. Dutch is waiting with Sheriff Gray outside the jailhouse, and Trelawny and Hosea are chatting. 

“There they are! I told you, these folks have a passion for justice. Dutch chuckles, patting Sheriff Gray on the back. Archibald takes Anders from Balius, parting through the group to take him into the jailhouse. 

“Thank you folks, your friend here is free to go.” Sheriff Gray responds, and now that you’re close, you can see the dark purple lines under his eyes. You can smell the alcohol on his lips and your lip turns up slightly. Sheriff Gray turns to Dutch, extending his hand out to shake. 

“Thank you, from the bottom of my heart.” Dutch smiles, playing up his charisma. You’re not sure what his angle is, but you know he's seeping through the cracks of Rhodes, slithering like a snake to find any tips he can get. 

“Mr. Macintosh, it has been a real pleasure.” The Sheriff says as the two shake hands. You place your hand over your mouth, hiding the smirk at his stupid fake name. Arthur smirks, unable to hide his smile from the way you struggle to contain your own. 

“Ah, ah, my friend, call me Hoagy.” Dutch corrects, and you turn around to hide your face as a small snort leaves your lips. Arthur would chastise anyone else for it, but he can’t bring himself to be mad at you, especially not when Dutch is making it so difficult.

“Rhodes welcomes you all. And thank you for getting Anders back.” Sheriff Gray addresses you, and you turn back to nod at him. He turns back around, walking towards a boy who is sitting outside. He shoos him in the jailhouse, and you watch for an extended moment as he chastises his son, you assume. 

“Beau, these better be ugly rumors! I heard you were seen with that wretched Braithewaite girl.” He calls, and your eyebrows pop up as you glance back at the group. Trelawny and Hosea regroup, and you all begin walking down the main road. 

“Where you been?” Arthur asks Trelawny, striking a match against his box before lighting a cigarette between his lips. A veteran without a leg, standing on a crutch, is begging for money outside the general store. Passing by, uninterested in the conversation ahead of you, you stop to place a few dollars into his hat. He thanks you, and you smile before rejoining the group.

“I've been renting a caravan behind the church. It's awful, but no one comes looking.” Trelawny chimes, and you snicker. 

“Apparently someone came looking, locked up as you were.” You point out as everyone begins escorting Trelawny back home. 

“I heard about your bounties… makes mine look like nothing but a penny.” Trelawny remarks back. Your anxiety picks up at the thought, and you look up to Arthur, holding your hand out in a silent question. He hands you his cigarette, and you take a drag from it before handing it back. Smoke fills your lungs, and when you release it, some of the anxiety floats away as well. 

“It’ll take them months to find us down here.” Dutch counters, confident in his leadership decisions. You’re not entirely sure if he's right on that account or not. 

“Well, they’re good bounties…” Trelawny adds, and you hear the trepidation in his voice, the nervousness hinting that they’re tighter on your tails than you’d originally thought, “And Miss Star, you’ve become quite the news topic. You’re a real point of conversation in the West.” 

Your blood runs cold as your stomach flips, and you try to comprehend what he’s said, and how he means. Even Arthur tenses at the admission. 

“A lady outlaw– they’ve conjectured quite the story about you.” He adds, and you take a few quick steps to catch up to him. 

“Where did you hear all this?” Dutch growls. Whether he’s mad at you, Trelawny, or the situation, you’re not sure. 

“A group of fellers near the state line. They said there was talk of it in bars five hundred miles to the west. There was talk of super agents.” 

Dutch laughs at that, and some of his bite falls away, “Super agents, huh? It’s just talk.”

You’re not so sure. After mixing with Cornwall back in Blackwater, robbing his trains and wagons ever since, and killing half his men in Valentine, you wouldn’t be surprised if he did hire some super agents. 

“I’m sure, but I had to tell you.” Trelawny defends, just as nervous as you. 

You approach the caravan in which he’s staying, and he walks on a few steps as you all stop. He turns to you, bowing for show. 

“Adieu.” He remarks, before walking back towards his rental. You and Arthur share a worried glance as Dutch and Hosea turn back, whistling for their horses. Stories aren’t good– talk isn’t good, and right now the attention seems to be on you. Arthur doesn’t like it one bit. 

“Arthur, Star, poke around the Braithewaite’s place. Hosea, see what you can find out about the Grays.” Dutch orders as your four horses trot towards you together.

“Sure.” You hum, watching as Arthur tosses his spent cigarette onto the grass. The sun is beginning to set, and it casts Rhodes in an orange light as you mount up onto Athena. 

“Some fishin’ trip.” Arthur mumbles, sore in the jaw from his earlier brawl.

Dutch, adjusting in his saddle, turns back to the three of you. 

“There’s still time. I’m up for it if you two aren’t burned out from your merry chase.” Dutch says, gripping his reins tightly as The Count paces. 

“Sure, why not?” You hum, knowing that Arthur’s been looking forward to the trip for a while, “Hosea take us to that spot you’re fond of.” 

“Let's see if we can avoid any more excitement.” Hosea chuckles before leading the way on Silver Dollar. You follow, leaning back in your saddle to prepare for the long ride. 

— — — —

Hosea's spot isn’t too far away, but it feels like it with the way your ribs ache. He leads you up north a ways, past Clemens Point up near the state line. 

“Just down here to the left.” Hosea says, leading you down the bank to the lakeshore. The sun casts a golden glow over the water as you approach a decent sized boat along the lapping water. 

“I’m sure no one will mind if we borrow one of these, c’mon.” Hosea hums, stretching after he dismounts his stallion. Everyone follows suit, walking towards the boat. 

“Madam.” Arthur hums, holding your hand as you step into the boat. You blush, still getting butterflies from the outlaw. 

He, Hosea and Dutch all push the boat into the water, jumping in one by one. Hosea rests at the front of the boat on the same bench as you the while Arthur sits in the middle and Dutch in the back. Arthur picks up the oars, watching you in the golden light as he begins to row. 

“I’ll row since you’re too old for real labor no more.” Arthur jokes. 

“And you’re too dumb for anything else.” Hosea quips, and Arthur laughs loudly as you smack Hosea lightly on the knee. 

“You’re still too quick for me, old man.” Arthur chuckles, rowing the boat out into the middle of the lake. 

“I enjoy picking on children.” Hosea hums, and Arthur huffs, pointing at you. 

“You don’t pick on her.” He points out. 

“No, I applaud her for putting up with you.” Hosea jokes, and Dutch laughs from the back of the boat. You shoot Arthur an apologetic look for the snicker that leaves your lips. The boys continue chuckling as Arthur rows the boat to a decent spot in the center of the lake. You remain seated as they stand, pulling out their fishing rods. 

“You don’t know how to fish, huh?” Arthur asks, and when you shake your head, he extends his hand out to you, “C’mere. I’ll show you.” 

You take his hand, soaking up the way it envelopes yours so wholly. He pulls you up, situating you in front of him with your back to his chest. Hosea watches on fondly, thinking of Bessie as Arthur places his fishing rod in front of you. His arms are around your shoulders, holding your hands over the rod. 

“Let’s hope for stupid fish and good luck.” Hosea hums, casting out as does Dutch. Arthur has some fancy lure attached to his rod. It’s colorful and you look at it curiously.

“Couldn’t we have just used a worm?” You ask as Arthur adjusts his feet at shoulders width apart behind you. 

“No, you’d have to be real lucky to catch a sturgeon or a bass with a worm.” Arthur hums, his chest rumbling at your back. 

If either Hosea or especially Dutch think anything odd of your position with Arthur, no one says anything. Hosea knows about your relationship. And Dutch? He suspects well enough.

“Alright, pull back just like this,” Arthur mumbles, helping you pull the rod back, “then release.” 

You let go of the string, sending the reel out a decent ways. Arthur smiles, letting you go so that you can hold it on your own.

“There you have it, now just wait for a bite.” 

It grows quiet save for the sound of sloshing water and the boat creaking. Dutch is the first to catch a fish, and when he unhooks the bass, a fond memory crosses his mind. 

“Star, you’ll like this story. Hosea, remember that time we sent Arthr out fishing? He brought back three beautiful bass.” Dutch remarks, and your attention flickers to him as you hold the rod steady. 

“Not this again.” Arthur sighs, and you turn around with your eyebrows pulled together and a smile on your lips. You know exactly what's about to happen– Dutch is going to pour out some good old fashioned embarrassment.

“I don’t remember.” Hosea hums, thinking back to where Dutch may be going with the story. 

“Oh yeah you do. He was younger, probably Star’s age, walked in all full of himself. We ate a big meal, toasted him all night.” Dutch continues with a smile as Hosea reels in a sturgeon. 

“This was fifteen years ago.” Arthur defends, watching as your line pulls tight. 

“Oh I remember now!” Hosea chuckles. Arthur comes forward, standing at your back again as he helps you reel in. The fish fights against you, and when you struggle to pull, Arthur’s hands line your and he assists. 

“The next week Arthur and I are at the market, the fishmonger calls out ‘So how’d you like those bass I sold you?’” 

Everyone except for Arthur laughs boisterously. You can picture it so clearly, him young and wanting to impress them. It's cute, though Arthur will never admit it.

“Listen. You can go fishin’, or you can go drinkin’ all day, rob someone and buy some fish.” He defends again as you both pull up a nice sized bass. Arthur unhooks the fish, tucking it into a bag in his satchel before helping you toss your line out again. 

“We might wanna swim to shore, darlin’.” Arthur jokes on account of being the source of entertainment. You chuckle, watching the ripples under the water as Hosea pulls up another fish. 

“No, I’m enjoyin’ this. Tell me more.” You smile. Though you hadn’t expected to, you’re having a good time. And Dutch seems to be on his best behavior as Hosea comes up with another story. 

“Remember when I caught those salmon? We had a banquet planned until Copper went and scoffed the lot.” Hosea scoffs, amused. 

“You never had control of that dog, Arthur.” Dutch chimes, hooking a fish

“Copper?” You ask, not remembering if you’ve heard the name before. Just as you ask, another fish bites, and Arthur helps you to start reeling it in. 

“Oh, my old dog. He was a good boy, had some spirit in him, that's for sure. Never lost the pup in him, not even in the end.” Arthur hums, a crestfallen look on his face. 

“I remember the day when we found you in the mud.” Dutch says, a smile on his lips at the old, fond memory, “Remember, Hosea?”

“How could I forget?” Hosea chimes. Arthur grows quiet, helping you reel in and unhook the fish. 

“You were so angry, full of rage and fear.” Dutch remarks, “You’ve grown, son.”

Arthur nods, hands tightening around your own. He's never been good at taking compliments, and that's not changing now. The four of you continue fishing as Hosea tells stories of old trips he’s gone on, and Dutch remarks about old steals. You learn a lot about Arthur, finding out that he’s always had a heart for animals, and that he used to be an awful shot. You also find out about how he tortured John upon his arrival, but would sneak him cigarettes and whiskey behind Dutch’s back. The boys tell you old stories until the sun sets and your bags are too full of fish to stuff them any more. You begin to drift off at Arthur’s chest , swaying back on your feet until his warm chest catches your back. 

"Easy there." He chuckles, low so that only you can hear. 

“I reckon it’s time we head back.” Arthur says, breaking down his fishing rod as you stir yourself back awake. 

"Already?" Dutch asks even though it's getting dark. 

"You ain't been chasin' outlaws." Arthur huffs as you sit down on the bench beside him. Dutch takes over rowing this time around, and you rest against Arthur's side as the lake air grows cold and the night falls to darkness. 

— — — —

They sing a song about mariners the whole trip back. You all opted to steal the boat, as it's quicker to row back to camp than it is to ride. And by the time you make it back, you're exhausted. Arthur helps you out of the boat, and you thank Dutch and Hosea before heading towards Pearson's table to drop off the fish with him. 

"You go on and get ready for bed, I'll meet you there." Arthur hums, holding his satchel in his hand. You nod, squeezing his free hand lightly before making your way to your tent. It takes you only moments to dress down, and the relief that fills you upon hitting the mattress is instant. You struggle to keep your eyes open, but you try your damndest to stay up for when Arthur comes in. The long day has left you tired, and even though Arthur promised you that he'd spend the night up with you, you both know you're too tired. 

Eventually, as your eyes flutter open and closed, Arthur parts the tent canvas and strides in. 

"Didn't have to stay up for me." Arthur coos, leaning down to press a kiss to your hair. 

"I wanted to." You counter, eyes slipping shut. 

"Scooch over, I'm comin' in." Arthur whispers, and you feel the bed dip as he slides in beside you. 

It was a good, busy, day. One filled with outlaws and robberies, theft and simple fishing. You look forward to working with Sadie again, and you worry over Micah's return alongside working with the Braithewaite's. 

But none of it matters now. Now you're safe, cuddled up to bed with Arthur, and everything seems like it's going to be okay. 

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