#this was fun! thank u so much for sending one

[russellsppttemplates]

Thank uu againn If by any chance could you make a part 2 of Max' interview with Julia but with the reader's reaction?? Thank u again!!

"Y/N!", Gianpiero called, "watch the TV because your husband and your little girl are delighting everyone who is watching!".

Going up to one of the screens, you changed the channel until you saw Max and Julia, "she loves when he pretends to eat her fingers!", you giggled as you watched your husband make the 'nom nom nom' noises.

"She's such a cute little girl", Amy from the media team smiled, "and she's totally a papa's girl", she mused.

"Absolutely, but they're so cute I can't be bothered by it, honestly", you smiled, watching Julia press a kiss to her father's cheek, "just look at them!", you cooed.

By the time they were back, Julia was craving some mama time, stretching her arms so you could hold her, "mama, mama, mama!", she chanted.

"Did you have fun with papa in his interviews? You were so cute people didn't care much about what he had to say - you didn't let papa do his Maxplaining to uncle Charles, did you, sweet girl?", you tapped her nose.

(Thank you for sending this in ✨️)

#max verstappen blurb #inês writes blurbs #f1 blurb #f1 x reader

[sseniita]

hi I really like the dumb blonde story! Will you write more of it? If not that's okay!

hsjdh

(also can you tag me if you do so I can see it?)

@wacko-weirdo sorry it took like a million years,,,, i had no idea what to write LOL , this one is for u my liege

i pledge allegiance to dumb blondes (2!)

part 1!

The villain didn’t know why he thought this would be easy. The hero was loud and attracted a lot of attention, not only to themself but to the villain as well. They would insist on keeping the other soldiers occupied with card games and nightcaps that kept them dizzy till morning which resulted in ten extra laps around the base during morning drills. 

They complained about broken nails, needed 15 minutes to do their hair, insisted on a private bathroom and argued with authoritative figures, but worst of all, they seemed to take a liking to the villain. They had gotten comfortable far too quickly. Though they never had the pleasure of fighting each other on the field, the sparring practice late at night behind the cafeteria proved the villain was missing out. The hero wasn’t good to any extent- but they were fun. 

To say the villain liked them was an overstatement. Perhaps saying the hero liked the villain was too. The villain could barely stomach when they showed up to breakfast practically shirtless, when they laughed at half-assed jokes, and returned lazy and suggestive compliments. But the villain liked them on the ground. Panting, bloody, covered in bruises and dirt. He liked it when they bounced back in a pathetic attempt to bring the villain down. He liked the way they’d try stalling by flirting, it was different when they did it with the villain as compared to the soldiers- it was malicious with intent.

“That was terrible.” The hero was on the ground, staining the cuff of their sleeve by cleaning the blood off their face. “Get up,” he demanded.  

The villain grabbed them by the collar of their jumpsuit. The hero only chuckled. 

“Ok. Ok. I’m up.” They rasped. 

“It’s been a month. You haven’t gotten any better. You’re wasting my time, hero.” The hero grabbed the villain’s wrist that was still gripping tightly to their collar. 

“Maybe I don’t wanna get better. Maybe I like the way you hit me.” 

Despite himself, the villain was amused. The hero was anything but heroic. They'd make a terrible captain. 

“You’re insane. I can’t wait to kill you.” The hero smiled at that- like it was the first real compliment they received since they arrived at the base. They got their footing and the villain let go. The hero feigned disappointment.

“There goes my plan to continue your rehabilitation,” they sighed "why continue training me then?"

“It’s more so for myself. It’d be boring if you died so quickly.” he turned to his jacket he’d disregarded when the fight was getting stuffy. "Besides, it's not like you're learning much of anything."

“I should kill you.” 

The villain clicked their tongue. “Now, now. Heroes don’t kill, sweetheart.” Before he could reach for his jacket, a force threw him down. The villain had almost forgotten the feeling of panic-fueled adrenaline, like a shock through his body.

In less than the second the villain took to realize what was going on, the hero was straddling his hips and sending two punches (one for good measure) right to his jaw. The villain spit out blood and stopped struggling against their tight hold.

The fact that the hero of all people had managed to overpower the villain was a cold realization that sent shivers up the his spine; (that could have also been thanks to the hero's muscular thighs around them- but who's to say) they were getting sloppy. The villain was at ease where he should definitely not have been.

Having the hero as his pawn in the game was as sobering of a thought as having the hero being the only pawn in the game, his plan, his magnum opus.

The hero could very easily destroy the villain's plan and make him start from zero, but if he played his cards right- they were also the key to his victory. Ironically, it wasn't much better on the hero's side: the hero needed the villain for their own reasons. Both extremely vital, but useless, if not fatal, if uncooperative. The villain knew the hero knew this. This is to say who is in control here?

After hero caught their breath, their hands landed on the villain's chest, applying enough pressure to be considered a warning.

“I win.” They smiled. “I may not be strong, but if I’m good at something it’s looking for an opening.” their lips curled into something knowing, something taunting. "Opportunities come in all shapes and sizes." They patted the villain's chest, almost amicably.

“I noticed, all with how natural it is for you to get on top of someone."

"Thanks." they sneered. No venom.

They leaned down, their lips dangerously close to the shell of his ear. 

“I know what your plan is. Trust me I won’t make it easy.” The villain only listened, coming to the exciting realization he was the hero's only pawn as well; no one was in control. And they had entered a complex mutually dependent situation. Perhaps the first for both of them. How romantic.

The villain turned his head, lips touching the hero's cheek as they whispered.

"Perhaps I’ll underestimate you when the time comes. But for now, you’re nothing more than a teenager whose daddy didn’t let play with the big kids.” 

“Ohh, it’s going to be so much fun bringing you down” 

“Oh, the most fun. But we have things to do before then, don’t we?” 

The hero pulled their face up to stare at the villain. Neither one of them looked away as they glared daggers. The hero finally chuckled, breathlessly. 

“You know what the other soldiers say about us?” The hero whispered, the electric tension immediately disappearing. They seemed to be good at that.

“Can you blame them? A popular hero and reformed villain sneak away in the middle of the night for hours.” The villain explained. “Bound to raise some eyebrows.” 

“Imagine the drama when we become best of friends at Hero HQ, only for a heartbreaking betrayal.”

“You’ve always been a spectacle, Hero.” The hero finally got off the villain, lending a hand the villain accepted and didn’t let go of once they were both standing. “You seem ok. But something tells me you’re so much worse.” 

“You’re a bad influence. And a wretched teacher.” 

“Unfixable, some would say.”

“Clearly.”

#hero x villain #villain x hero #writing #original fiction #hero and villain #this isn't worth the wait LOL #i hate these guys #boooo #tomato tomato

[stevebabey]

uhm shyly comes into your inbox to give a steve idea :’)

finding him so so so pretty in that stupid dark blue polo, not being able to really look at him properly. it’s tight against his chest and stomach which makes him look delicious, wanting to be devoured really. he’s simply so pretty. worst thing is: he fucking knows it. so he’s cocky about it and teasing, it’s never relenting. he loves it and honestly so do you.

(feel free to ignore!)

trying to get my steve groove back on!!! thank u for sending something nonnie!! a lil bit of shy!reader <3 just a blurb too

Steve doesn’t know it’s a favourite of yours.

One of his polos fits his chest pretty perfectly if anyone asks your opinion. It’s that nice navy colour that looks good against his tan skin, with a bold stripe of white through the middle. A little plain but classic.

It hugs his biceps snugly and stretches ever so slightly over his chest. At the right angle, you can see the definition of his pecs and it’s awfully good at reminding you of what they look like with no shirt on at all.

The thought makes you fluster a bit.

He’s got plenty of polos but this one— this is your favourite. And he’s wearing it tonight, on Valentine’s day, and now you’re not quite sure you’ve been as slick with your wandering eyes as you hoped.

Across the booth, Steve smiles at you, his lashes kissing in the corner. He reaches up to scratch at the back of his neck and your eyes zero in on the bulge of his bicep instantly.

Steve’s smiles melts into a grin, a tad wicked.

Yeah, okay, maybe he does know it’s your favourite.

You fluster again. Something nudges at your foot under the table, right as Steve says, “What?”

He’s teasing. He definitely knows what.

“Stop,” you murmur, on the side of embarrassed. “You know what.”

Steve smiles again and drops his arm, thankfully, only to fold them and lean forward on the table. It does wonders for his arms, especially in that shirt. Damn that shirt. Damn him. He’s evil.

“Do I know what?” He pretends to muse thoughtfully.

He tilts his pretty head to the side just an inch. His eyes stay locked on you, drinking up every second your flustered reaction. You’re beautiful, even more so when you get all embarrassed about liking him.

“Steve.”

“What?”

“I will not be responsible for any further inflation of your ego, thank you very much.” You mumble it as you take a sip of your soda, eyes on the table. Why is it so terrible to have him know you were leering at him?

Steve laughs loudly. He finally slides his arms back and off the table, giving you a temporary relief.

“You’re the only one who can inflate my ego, actually.” Steve counters, his brows raising. He steals a fry off your plate and chews it slowly.

You eye him over your cup, skeptical.

“What do you mean?”

“Well,” He shrugs, swallowing his food. He takes a sip of his own milkshake, oh-so casual when he says, “Your opinion is the only one that really matters to me anyways.”

He grins across the table at you, a more mischievous shine in his eyes.

“Why do you think I picked this shirt?”

You’re equal parts mortified and enthralled at what he’s said. In your surprise, you accidentally inhale a bit of your soda and it burns as it goes down the wrong way— you cough awkwardly to clear it. Okay, less equal, more mortified now.

It’s your turn to ask. “What?”

Steve nudges your foot under the table again, teasing and flirting all in one. His pink lips curve into that grin that makes your heart flip flop— and there’s even a slight pink tinge to his cheeks. As though he’s also endeared but embarrassed by your attention.

“It’s your favourite.”

“It’s—” You splutter and for some reason, decide to lie. “No, it’s not!”

“Yes, it is!”

“No, it’s—” You pivot mid-sentence. “Who told you?”

Steve laughs again, that big loud belly-laugh where his cheeks get all chipmunk-y cos he’s grinning so hard. When he stops laughing enough to talk, he’s reaching across the table. You’re not quick enough to pretend to avoid his hand as he snags it with his own.

“Baby,” he says. “Nobody had to tell me. I could just tell.”

Somehow when he says it like that, when he calls you baby in a voice all sticky with fondness, it doesn’t seem like such a bad thing at all.

You nudge him back under the table and sip your sofa again to try think of something to say. He knows what you look like when you love something. How terrifying. How intimate.

Another sip of soda. Steve rubs his thumb over the back of your hand, content to gaze you. His view is sweet enough he must have cartoon hearts circling above his head.

You can’t think of anything to say in the end, so you just squeeze his hand and nudge his foot again — and trust that he’ll just be able to tell what you mean.

#this was fun! thank u so much for sending one #it was a challenge to make something go with it #i’m feeling very into new relationship getting used to each other jitters <3 #ruby writes steve #steve x reader #steve harrington #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x reader blurb #steve harrington x you #steve x you #a baby baby blurb :) enjoy !

[love-songs-for-emma]

im actually amazed i cant find this;

SPN FRIENDS HII

do any of u know where i could find a gif of dean saying the iconic quote of "You know who wears sunglasses inside? Blind people. And douchebags." from s9 e5 "dog dean afternoon"

i SWEAR i had it saved years ago but i cant find it. pls help. xoxo

#yes theres a supernatural gif for everything and every moment #if it doesnt exist anymore thats okay one day ill make it myself #but i feel like this comes up a Lot and i'd love to be able to send this regularly #thank u gif makers btw. u literally make the world go round #i dont have an income rn but if anyone who makes fandom art (gifs fic etc) ever wants pics of my cat cas my dms are OPEN #always ready to send cas pics. always. #also for context. when watching the s1 ep ''faith'' my partner /immediately/ made fun of the faith healer for wearing sunglasses inside at #night and i responded so deadpan ''john hes BLIND'' #ajchskncksjx #thinking abt that always and whenever we see someone wearing sunglasses in a piece of media this moment comes up #i sent him the lady gaga gif where she goes ''incredible. show-stopping. never been done. completely original. [etc]'' and #he responded ''is she blind'' KAJXKSJX #for ONE: that is LADY GAGA so NO U CANT MAKE FUN OF HER EVER and for TWO: AKCHKSXJKD #he just had to make sure. just had to check. #anyway. im done now #spn #dean winchester #gif search #supernatural #may delete later if anyone ever finds it #thank u for checking if u do #<3<3<3 #much love to everyone ever. yk yk

[lorephobic]

2, 17, 22 for Saltburn

2. a compelling argument for why your fave would never top or bottom

this means nothing to anybody who follows me for saltburn, but i just answered this question about my other blorbo and came to the exact same conclusion for the complete opposite reason. oliver quick would NEVER top because he is clawing to be the main character of every room that he enters. he wants to be desired so badly that he'll reinvent himself into whoever he thinks you want.

there's a sort of trope in obsession-related media where the obsessor ends up forcefully taking from their victim exactly what they want. and i think that oliver subverts this narrative by never taking anything from felix. he never asks for more than he's given. when he finally has the opportunity to kiss felix, he doesn't. he takes from venetia, and he takes from farleigh, and he takes from james and elspeth, but at the crux of his character, is his need to be taken by felix. this is, of course, a metaphor for bottoming LMAO

17. there should be more of this type of fic/art

ok so tbh i'm not a huge fic person because i'm so incredibly picky about the way that the media that i care about is interpreted, which is why i've never read a single saltburn fic and honestly i probably won't ever, just because i feel like there is very little room in this story to expand and no way to twist and rewrite it in a way that is true to the characters that i care so much about. but WITH THAT BEING SAID, i was honestly so totally astonished by @125hr's cattonquick art that it made me realize that maybe i do want to see more beautiful art of them kissing and we can all pretend like they had their moment<333

22. your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores

this should honestly be it's own post, but since my last rewatch i've been thinking a ton about the final dance being a reflection of felix's initial tour through saltburn, which has been talked about! but what i haven't seen talked about is all of the other scenes that end up echoing each other. felix's life on the screen and oliver's role in it form a perfect mirror image, starting and ending with oliver staring at felix at parties and not being able to touch him. starting and ending with oliver watching felix have sex with someone that's not him. starting and ending with oliver fucking people who aren't felix in an attempt to get closer to him. on a second rewatch, when you know all of the signs, there's such a devastating sense of oliver returning back to square one, lost in a crowd full of felix's friends and nobody even knows his name. there is a time before felix and there is a time after felix and exactly at the center of this timeline, there is a man on his hands and knees in a bathtub getting the closest he will ever get to the thing that he wants.

#saltburn posting #asks #worried that with 2 im drawing a false relationship between bottoming and being desired and being taken #which is rapidly leading me down the linguistic rabbit hole of what it means to be fucked #and how that word holds a negative connotation that is so deeply ingrained into the way that we speak and think #to be fucked is a bad thing. it is an insult to say fuck you. #and of course all of this has its roots in misogyny #but i think it's worth mentioning that it is probably slightly problematic to conflate one on the receiving end of sex #with one who is being taken from #which in isolation already sounds extremely puritanical and is not at all what im going for here LMAO #anyway SORRY these r so long #they should honestly all be their own posts because i have so much to say all of the time #but these were SO fun to spend some time thinking about so thank u for sending them<3

[manuscrypts]

any tcm character(s) +✂️ for a hair-themed headcanon

are there any hairstyles you think the characters would suit? who is the most high maitenance when it comes to hair? or if you wanna go nasty... any thots on body hair?? (you don't have to answer these specifically im just throwing ideas around lol)

send me a thematic headcanon

oooo I love this one!! sorry it’s so long but I love this like this, my lil brain gets so excited

JOHNNY has definitely tried a short back and sides, and also would have absolutely tried (and kinda rocked) a mullet — but he’d just go back to his usual hair style because hes used to that the most and he knows how to style it without much effort. I definitely think he’d suit the mullet / rocker style though

HITCHHIKER doesn’t really do much with his hair but he’s the type that’d kinda end up suiting a top knot in a crackhead type of way, yk? he occasionally ties up his hair anyway because of it being so warm and when he’s working on making traps n his hair gets in his way and he kinda looks good, so I definitely think after awhile he’d suit it, but his hair is too much his style to change up that much

SONNY definitely would suit growing his hair out and having more of an afro, which he’s definitely done, and honestly I think he’s the character that suits the most hair styles and changing things up for sure

JULIE would suit having like a long bob type haircut, especially with her cute bangs and maybe some layers thrown in, but she’d probably end up hating it because she can’t braid it anymore or get it out her face properly so she’d probably just stick with her long hair

family side of the most high maintenance is definitely JOHNNY, he prides himself on his appearance and because of him going out to pick people up, he alwaaays makes sure he looks good. when it comes to victims, I think JULIE would be the most high maintenance, simply because of where she grew up and because she also prides herself on how good she looks, she definitely always needs to make sure her hair looks good, it’s one of her most important things I think!

oooh, okay i love talking about body hair (I know that’s sooo weird ;-;) okay so when it comes to everyone I’m just gonna bullet point them, is that too much detail? 😭

COOK : he doesn’t do ANYTHING, he’s old and tired, he doesn’t gaf anymore, and even in his youth he wouldn’t have done anything

BUBBA : okay we all know bubba, leave him alone

HITCHHIKER : I honestly don’t think hitchhiker has that much hair, he doesn’t have a load of leg hair, but he has a lot of armpit hair that stinks because my man doesn’t wash his arms properly 😭 also definitely has thick pubes but not too bushy, yk?

SISSY : she actually grooms herself pretty well surprisingly, she just doesn’t always keep on top of it, she shaves her legs and under her arms if she’s wearing something that shows her arms!! when it comes to pubes she trims and keeps it looking neat but she has pride in her bush

JOHNNY : mans kinda hairy, a little chest hair, decent bit of leg hair, but he does shave and manscape! shaves his armpits pretty often, and he doesn’t shave down there but he trims it a lot to keep it nice and neat

NANCY : she’s also old and tired, doesn’t really care to shave the hair she has left, which isn’t much, and she never really shaved much other than the lower half of her legs and occasionally her armpits

CONNIE : she’s hit and miss with it, she doesn’t mind doing it occasionally but she doesn’t go out of her way to do anything. she’ll shave her legs the most often, because she’s always wearing shorts, but her armpits and pubes are a different story. also I headcanon connie with hairy arms that she doesn’t shave because she doesn’t mind having the slightly darker hair on her forearms n she kinda likes it!

LELAND : shaves his chest, with whatever hair he manages to grow, but then he doesn’t really touch the rest of his hair — unless it gets so wild it annoys him, then he’ll trim it up but that’s it honestly

ANA : she didnt really care about it all that much but she shaves because of cheerleading, trims the bits that can’t be seen but when it comes to pubes, she kinda likes having the full bush

SONNY : let’s his hair grow, occasionally trims his pubes but not often, he likes his natural hair and thinks he looks good with it (he does). he doesn’t have loads of leg hair, but still enough, and he has a little bit of chest hair — definitely has a great happy trail too

JULIE : trims and shaves and plucks everything super often, likes how it feels afterwards and just likes how she looks like that

DANNY : trims his armpits and pubes occasionally but leaves everything else, he’s not really that bothered but he likes to keep himself “cleaned up”

#‧₊˚✩彡 🪚 ── ( wanna play a game? ) #⁶⁶⁶ 💌 ── ( mary’s letter sent to : creepling ) #eeee this was super fun to do omg!! #i love doing headcanons so much or things like this #I’ll have to send you some later!!’ 😈😈😈 #thank u for sending one in 😭 #tcm #tcm x reader #texas chainsaw game #texas chainsaw massacre

[actuallyitsstar]

CHARACTER ASK GAME

Pete "Maverick" Mitchell + 21, 24 and 25?

✨ send me a number and a character! ✨

21. If you're a fic writer and have written for this character, what's your favorite thing to do when you're writing for this character? What's something you don't like?

i actually already answered this question here, so i will give an honorary mention for this ask, in addition: i am a big fan of the whole tgm-mav-lowkey-being-the-daggers'-friends'-cool-dad trope. like. the idea that they get to know him after the mission and he's obviously taken a genuine interest in all of them and their wellbeing so they all just...stay in touch. the idea that the call and check up on him when they know rooster is deployed, that they start to leave a few extra things at mav's place because he usually hosts their squad movie nights and it's just easier to crash there sometimes, that they realize he doesn't have many people to spend the holidays with now outside of obviously bradley, and they all come together and drag him to a surprise christmas party with them before they go on their own leave for their respective family christmases. that's their emotional support old navy captain and if u wanna mess w him u gotta get thru 11 daggers and 1 son first so good luck!!!

that being said, tho, it can go too far i think, if we're not careful. barring a couple specific circumstances (jake and whatever fucked up childhood/non-existent parental relationships he has had comes to mind) the daggers all have families of their own, and entire lives before meeting mav. i don't think he's like. their DAD per se. he's their friends' cooler than expected dad ('your dad is an ace? that's so cool! i wonder if he has any stories to tell us! he once flipped off a mig while inverted? THATS SO COOL') that they can become friends with and look out for too, and i KNOW he'll be looking out for them. if they need anything he's right there, because that is within his nature. but for the most part, they're all adults who have friendships, and not like. Extra Children. if you know what i mean. except for jake idk i think he needs a role model or something but i guess that makes mav a secret third thing to him idk

24. what other character from another fandom reminds you of them?

oof that is tough!! i think that on most levels, mav is very different from the characters in other fandoms that i have imprinted on the most, so i'm not going to be able to do a 1:1 comparison here. but believe it or not the very first character that came to mind for me is ezra standish from the magnificent seven tv series, and it's not an exact match but i'm just going to provide my presentation on the matter (i am specifically comparing tg86 mav with ezra bc i have no one to compare tgm mav with lol):

horrible quality images (yes i did make these gifs but theyre very old so lets not talk about it lol) bc this is an obscure 1990s b-budget tv show shot on vhs probably. but this guy right here is either the second or third youngest member of his found family group (the seven ~lawmen~ a local circuit judge hires to manage an old west territory because it's so dangerous the sheriff and deputy he'd previously appointed ran out on the job). he's very accomplished at what he does, for his age, and has had way too many shitty life experiences and is much too world-weary already. everyone who works with him comes into it with a preconceived notion of how he's going to be. and how could they not? it isn't that the other six guys are short-sighted in assuming, exactly. ezra is direct about who he is and what he stands for, downright in your face about it, actually. you expect him to be kind of an arrogant asshole, and he tells you he's gonna be one. and then, for a while anyway, he kind of is.

loner type, doesn't need anyone, he's going to do everything his way because he knows best, needlessly theatrical about it in the process. they expect him to run out on them during their battle, and he does.... kind of. but he also comes through for them in a critical moment when he's needed most and they least expect him to do it, single-handedly taking out multiple enemies to save their lives. immediately, he adopted into the group, essentially, but ezra doesn't know enough about really having friends to recognize that it's happening until much later. additionally, his entire life and livelihood is overshadowed by his mother (who can be seen sitting in the bg of the larger gif), who is still very much alive, in his case, but whose actions and words define him, whether he wants them to or not. he had a shitty childhood bouncing between a hundred strangers' and distant family members' homes alike and is just overflowing with abandonment issues, and he expects the other six to give up on him at the drop of a hat, but they never do.

25. what was your first impression of this character? how about now?

the very first time i ever saw top gun was before tgm was ever a thing. i remember my favorite character being goose (isnt he always tho <3) and thinking mav was kind of a bland action hero guy with a story arc i did not understand at all or care about. i was like fifteen, tho, and hadn't seen hardly any movies or tv shows at the time because i had a kind of weird sheltered from media sort of childhood, so i don't think i had rly learned HOW to watch and interpret media and characters yet, tbh. when the sequel was coming out i rewatched top gun with my partner in preparation bc my parents were making me watch the new one, and they had never seen it. i was like oh !!! he's smol and traumatized. i bet there's fic about him and that blonde guy. i should look that up later. and then we watched tgm and that was it for me. i was like never mind him and that blonde guy i need to know if hIS RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS SON TURNS OUT OK......MY HEART..... and that was that lol. my dna has not been the same since <3

#star unasks #daffodilstark #TYSM FOR THE ASK !!! and for giving me a platform to/putting up w me going off about my mega obscure blorbo ezra standish. im love him #hes not a one to one for mav but probably the closest option i could think of if you only talk about the highlights that are similar lol. #asks are so much fun thank u for sending them ily <3<3 #mine #top gun #stars scribbles

[rosenbergamot]

What about the word: mistake

YIPPEE ok i found this old silly fic i was writing ab vampire mumbo and nobody knowing or believing that hes a vampire. its just like little snippets until the big reveal and i think im gonna pick it back up bc it was fun and silly and i enjoyed it. heres a small scene from it!!

There’s someone approaching; he hears him clunking down the stairs. Judging by the scent (all warm wet moss and Etho’s deodorant) it’s absolutely Bdubs. He turns to see him, wiping a trail of blood off of his mouth with his suit jacket-- he’d gotten a little aggressive while feeding, made a little mistake, killed a villager, all that. 

“Hi Mumbo-- oh my gosh!” He trips on the last step as he sees the blood. Smells very much like Etho. They must have just stopped hanging out. Why on Earth is he here, then? “W-What the heck? Are you okay?! My god, he’s bleeding everywhere! I don’t know first aid! What should I do?”

His friend frantically runs around, searching for a first aid kit or a potion or anything. It’s quite silly of him. There isn’t even a visible wound. He looks perfectly fine.

“BdoubleO, I’m perfectly fine! Calm down, man!”

He stops so quickly it should leave an indent in the stone. “Then why the heck is there so much blood everywhere, Mumbo? Huh?”

“Just doing my daily feeding is all.” 

“You eat blood?!” He cries out, face paling. The allay part of him makes a distressed chiming sound before he slaps a hand over his mouth, clearly embarrassed. “Is that a thing humans do? I need to ask Iskall next time I see them…” 

What.

“No, it’s a vampire thing, mate… like the first thing people think of when you say vampire.” 

“Oh, Mumbo, you’re such a prankster!” He slaps his knee. “You set this whole thing up just to make a vampire joke? That’s freakin’ rich, man. Do you not have anything else to do?”

His eyes narrow. “No, BdoubleO, I suppose I don’t have anything else to do.” 

“You should probably get a hobby! Just saying!” He chirps very helpfully. The villagers have started to recuperate. Their ire has been forgotten as he turns to stare at them. He hopes his eyes communicate the ‘what the absolute hell?’ sort of vibe he’s going for. They seem just as puzzled as he does, twin puncture wounds on each of their necks. 

He sucks a bit of stray blood off his fang. “You know what, Bdubs? I think you’re right. Maybe my new hobby will be convincing people I’m a vampire.” 

“You’re gonna have to get more convincing than this,” Bdubs gestures to all the blood. “I mean, I thought you were injured or something! Thank goodness you’re not-- though I do know how to take care of it. Licensed first aid and all that.”

He just nods and tries to look very convinced. “I’m sure you do. Now why are you in my trading hall…?” 

Bdubs launches into a rant about how he ran out of building materials halfway through constructing his stable, but all Mumbo can think about is how strange it is that this has happened twice. Do people… really not know?

#finding new excuses to juts post chunks of my fanfiction without actually finishing it #hermitblr #hermitfic #hermitcraft #THANKS FOR SENDING ONE IN <3 #theres not much to say ab this one its very lighthearted and enjoyable. fun family friendly fun (with lots of blood) #rosie talks #ask game #can u tell i have no restraint in how much i post #blinks so cutely at u

[bakatenshii]

hello hi bonsoir — my dash is the sahara desert rn, a barren post-apocalyptic wasteland. pls send blogs to follow i am on my knees!! xoxoxoxo

#baka bants #im happy with any fandom tbh!! #im not rly hyperfixatin on any at the moment but just the #jjk csm bllk bnha hq !! general fandoms #or u know what if theres any other fansomsbu think r #fun n fresh #im happy to dive in #(minus trigun soz ive tried multiple times in the past but couldnt get into it) #(granted it was the og one so its super dated and it felt dated in a way i didnf care for) #(genshin is always welcome but for some reason my brain is kinda scared of that fandom #bcos thres so many minors and puritans LAKAOAKOA) #(bjt i could obv be wrong & also mildly hypocritcal oopsies) #ANYWAYS PLS DO SEND ME ACTIVE BLOGS <333 #i am also happy fo follow back obviiuuously if u r active and want to scream abt anything #*bows* thank u so much <333 #IVE BEEN RESORTING TO THE FOR YOU TAB #BUT EVERY TIME IVE GONE I THERE IVE BEEN BOMBARDED BY 16 YR OLD BLOGS #AND ITS SO SCARY DCARY #I FEEL LIKE IM GOING THRU GRASS IN POKEMON #SCREAMS

[velvetineblue]

* 90's alt-rock band THEME SONG plays * ft. @hvnbrn & bee

#only REAL 90's kid will understand this vhs box aesthetic ++ remember when tai-dae first hooked up in a CHUCK E . CHEESE !!!!!!! #( i am not even kidding -- that is real lore ) #asjajja luv bee for that; bee gets me #dae & tai were one of his very first ships cAN U BELIEVE........ #idt i even knew how to open PS back then ... now i will send random edits when you're not expecting it 8 ) hehe #but having so much fun writing a btvs verse with beeee !! #thanks bee for letting me yell abt vampires with u < 3 #hvnbrn

[minasweep]

I wanted to ask if u like animal crossing and if you have any of the games? You seem like an animal crossing enthusiast (⁠｡⁠◕⁠‿⁠◕⁠｡⁠)

im so so sorry to tell u I'VE NEVER PLAYED ANIMAL CROSSING !!! (つд⊂) o(T□T)o

#it looks so so cute and fun and like smth id LOVE to play (esp new horizons !!) #alas im a game console-less girl </3 ive seen a few friends play and ots so so cute !!! #shima recommend it to me too and i havent played </3 #im so so sorry yee (￣▽￣;) one day ill play animal crossing it'll b so nice <33 #i hope u have a most wonderful of days of all time 4 ever n every other day yee !! thank u so much for sending an ask !!!

[rinhaler]

okay ive queued all of my match ups to go up every two hours!

#🧚🏽‍♀️ — luxe chit chat #very overwhelming i wasnt expecting it to be so much work lmao #but its fun!! #i just didnt expect as many people to join as they have! #I'll be closing the event soon so if you want one feel free to send an ask and i will get to it asap #taking a lil break for now tho #thanks to everyone who has joined and followed me i appreciate u all so so much <3

[made-nondescript]

Suggestion for hermit defining episodes: More people need to watch Cub's Moon McGee episode (S8E39). I looked it up for this ask and couldn't believe it was one of his least viewed of season 8.

OK. having not watched cub's s8 i was WOEFULLY unaware of this episode and a few things:

Holy Shit Cub's s8 base is fucking insane oh my god. I knew it was insane. but actually watching him walk around it and work on it and place blocks is just. My God.

how did he make timelapses fun to watch. not a timelapse hater i just zone out easily. i liked the whole interrupting them part way through think it kept me tuned in

genuinely the funniest cub video i think i've watched to date! I've been keeping up with his s9 (which is very good) but this episode had so many fun cuts and bits, even outside of Moon McGee! (which was very funny itself and one of the best uses of planned hermit cameos ive seen)

TL;DR: Vouch go watch cub's s8e39 dont believe me heres a doodle ooo you wanna watch it sooo bad

#anon thank you so much for the suggestion !!!! great video #i wasnt expecting much to come of that post i made about hermit defining eps #but if anyone else has any PLEASE feel free to send them #could put together a Hermit Sampler or something. like one of those cheese boards. does that make sense #or maybe im trying to manipulate u all into giving me good episodes to watch wink emoji whos to say #ANYWAY. watch cubfan he is a funny guy #and HIGH on the list of hermits who are the best to fall asleep to (his humor is very dry) #that would be a fun tier list. actually. hrmmmmmm #nondescript ask

[lavenoon]

ABSOLUTELY ADORING THE DYNAMIC BETWEEN THE AGENTS ASKJDHFKLJSHDF ESPECIALLY IN THE MOST RECENT COMIC. Both the boys respective "people" end up in the hospital around the same time, and the suspicion is nonexistent. BEAUTIFUL!!! Keep up the amazing work!!! :D

-G

HEHEHE THANK U!! <333

Now, now, Robin got stabbed - and Y/N has appendicitis, something totally normal, really! Sure, the pain may almost be described as stabbing and it'll leave them with a surgery scar in the lower abdominal area, but really, whyever would that be related to Robin's stabbing!

But no yea on a more genuine note, I'm really glad the dynamics are fun!! This is one of the tenser moments apart from the reveal, but I still tried to make it fun with the usual obliviousness and banter - glad that came across well!! Looking forward to sharing more of these idiots with you guys! <3

#answer let luce #anonymous #G asks #accidentally undercover #they don't even *think* about it like not even a 'huh what a weird coincidence - anyway' #Y/N comes back home and thanks Sun for the basket and he's like oh!! u enjoyed it!! #and they go :T yea it was better than the one my annoying coworker sent me. tho ig it was sweet he cared enough to send one to begin with.. #they do not realize then either. #god they're so much fun. idiots (affectionate)

[20cm]

♡ megbias highlight reel — heart boys, if you will . for meg @slowrabbitpd , happy birthday . ♡

#caleb.gif #i could tag all these guys but honestly this is For meg <3 :') its rly not fandom related its just going to be posted on tumblr dot com #( if anyones curious tho: changkyun + yeonjun + kang daniel / kihyun + junhyeok + taehyun / seungyeop + steve + romin ) #meg!! happy birthday bestie 💕 #really i hope you have an absolutely wonderful day ahead of you and are able to enjoy it w/ your People whoever they may be #and that you get to treat yourself to something fun <3 and have a wonderful meal 💖 #spiritually i am making you egg on rice right now.. or go out for kbbq or w/e u kno.. #truly its been an absolute pleasure to have met you and become friends outside just being mutuals on tumblr #youre such a fun and warm and funny person whos just . smart as a whip and have a killer sense of design and general eye #ur an absolute joy to talk to nd i cherish all the roller coasters we've been on together since last year .. theres no one else id rather - #be SO so normal with <3 u just Get it. and i appreciate that more than i could put into words. i love all our shared megrook bias boys + #biases in law? is that what we can call it. anyways. megbiases are treasured <3 so i wanted to include them in a little something #all for you <3 including some very special sky pics !! bc u sent them to me a while ago and i treasured them!! so. have some megbias boys #peeking into ur photos. thats the concept yup fkgjkjdgf idk i just had an idea of sort of .. flipping thru photos here. #anyways. love u bestie! very much. sending u big warm hugs #we are the [deep breath] #taejunist high school yearbook editor freshman orientation leader magic and hiyyih defense squadists kep1er detectives #the boyz gatekeepers woojinist dailytaehyun and soobinsource admin team •_• (witnesses of the horrors) + peer review service #^ that gets longer EVERY time. lmfao 💕 #ill shut up now but <3 just thank u for being here and being u. i admire u and cherish our friendship + thank u for ur endless patience #bc ik the last few months i was sorta awol but u never once made me feel bad for it and its that sort of level of Comfortable that means - #the world to me<3 so im glad i have tht w/ u <3 #MWAH ok [posts]

[daydadahlias]

Omg I only said this because you said that you loved anon hate but now I genuinely feel so bad, I actually love the way you describe Ashton in every fic, sorry if i ruined it ::sob::

1) this is adorable and I love you

2) please enjoy a small collage of me being excited about getting fake anon hate

#you played me like a fiddle I must say I’m impressed #ahjdjsjsa I was so delighted by it actually #like y’all think I’m joking when I say I love anon hate but this is how I react LMFAO #you didn’t ruin it lol but please don’t feel obligated to send me anon hate 💙 #god that’s the funniest fucking thing actually #thank you #pigeon #anon #so cute lmfao #I was thinking abt all the possible quippy one-liners I could wip out #I was so excited #the best part of this is y’all are conditioning me to assume any anon hate I get is my friends trying to make me feel loved HAKFJSJDA #god BLESS the actual people that want to send me hate I’m so sorry guys #someone actually hates me and is like ‘I hate u’ and I’m like ‘omg thank u 🥺’ #rip to actual anon h8ers #convinced I’ve actually never gotten real anon hate before ever. it’s all just my friends knowing how much I love it #fun fact all anon hate Anna gets is actually from me #that’s not true #sigh I wish I could feign stupidity that well 🤚 #anyway thank you ahdjjaja this is so sweet #dude i wanted u to come back and cite ur sources #i wanted to hear which ones of my fics sucked #i wanted that so bad