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#we are going to add us to things
blakbonnet · 2 months
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my queers in christ we must fight homogeneity in fandom; it's evil and the death of creativity and a brain killer, we do not want to be smooth uniform identical shiny rocks, reading the same characterisations over and over again, we do not want to reiterate the same takes or the same fics, we want the creepiest weirdos coming up with shit so fantastical that it becomes fantastic, that is the point of it all
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thelassoway · 7 months
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Jason Sudeikis as Ted Lasso Seasons 1-3 » T-shirts
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py6oto · 5 months
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christmas tales
2023.12.11
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starrysharks · 5 months
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google "how to write a character who is known within her universe for having no filter and swearing a lot (especially in the face of authority) without having it read like i graduated from vivziepop school of writing"
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there's so much utena discourse around certain aesthetic signatures of the show (in particular, scenes and shots like the sword pulls, the transformations and outfits, etc.) and, like, surface-level discussions over whether these things are "Actually Beautiful" or "Actually Bad."
and i totally get it, especially with regards to some scenes---like the ways in which people have taken the ending scene of episode 33 and turned into weird pastel-pretty aesthetic boards lmao----but i do feel like a lot of the discussion is over-simplistic, and disconnected from the actual framing and themes of the series
utena and anthy's world is full of beauty. it is also full of horror and pain. there is often no clear delineation between the two, and we are forced (quite generously!) to recognize both sides of this.
the sword pulls oftentimes carry feelings of manipulation, hurt, subservience. anthy summoning the sword drives in the repetitive, obedient actions she is forced to repeat time and time again for others as the rose bride. in the black rose arc, they're violent and terrifying. in the third arc, they're stand-ins of the dysfunctions the characters have with the person drawing them, the ways in which their emotions are being twisted and ignored.
and yet! they're beautiful.
they're incredibly intimate moments, in which the two characters---who, generally speaking, are either emotionally or physically estranged from one another---cradle or hold one another, pull out a culmination of that person's essence, as a heavenly light frames the two of them together. the first time anthy does it to utena, it is out of genuine fear for her, her voice quivering with fear as she tries to do anything to help her! it's love! it's an act of beautiful love!
when pressed on how it felt to have their sword drawn, the duelists are flustered---they can't say it was just painful, because it was more than just painful. the screams of the black rose arc turn into something more quiet, ethereal, pretty---and yet still uneasy, unsettling.
a similar conversation can be had about utena and anthy's outfits. they're symbols of their roles as duelist and rose bride, and for anthy in particular it's an outfit emblematic of her status as a static, never-moving prize to be won. the outfits are as ugly as the entire dueling system, and yet---while recognizing this---the show doesn't stray away from associating the dress and the duels with delightful, beautiful imagery. the rose imagery in general is very beautiful and striking, even at some of the more dark moments!
there is an aesthetically pleasing contrast between anthy's dress and utena's uniform---one that goes back ages in terms of our understandings of gender and social status. why is that beauty there? well, for a lot of reasons! one is definitely making us question what we think of as beautiful, particularly in the contexts of gender roles and society (why did we have that gut impulse to see anthy in that dress as beautiful to begin with?) but, for the sake of this post, i think the most satisfying answer is because horror and beauty are usually intertwined in our actual lives.
so much of the show is dedicated to both finding beauty in horrifying situations and seeing how beautiful things are oftentimes pretty horrifying. anthy and utena's relationship is beautiful, but grows out of abuse, sexism, queerphobia, and hurt.
when utena and anthy dance in front of everyone at the ball, how do we interpret that? well, our first instinct is as a beautiful scene of budding love and care between the two of them; our second instinct (especially after watching the show) is that it's another example of the way in which they've both been boxed into these roles of prince and bride---and all as hundreds of eyes are staring at them. when does the line between gender as choice and performance begin, and when does it become oppressive gender roles? when does anthy's performance as the meek rose bride become her real self? when do the two's relationship become loving, and when do they stop hurting each other? when do the ugly things at ohtori become beautiful, and when do all of the beautiful things become ugly?
and there's not really one point, always, although sometimes there are---and sometimes there's multiple points, and sometimes there was no transformation at all, and sometimes things never stopped oscillating between good and bad, ugly and beautiful, scary and hopeful.
and like, even beyond the really radical ways this impacts the queer and feminist readings of the show, i just think that's also very nice. so much of utena is built on recognizing the beauty in the world. the main characters live in a shitty world while leading shitty lives. and they find beauty in it still.
(i will here also add here at the end that when the show wants to make a very clear definitive statement on one of its aesthetics being basically entirely bad with no beauty behind it, it's very frank in its framing. see: any shot with utena in a dress or her girl's uniform)
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pocketsizedquasar · 4 months
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TPOC-Prioritized writings on anti-transmasculinity / transandrophobia
transandrophobia / anti-transmasculinity are both theories that have been spearheaded primarily by trans poc, particularly Black transmascs and transfemmes.
unfortunately, as with Everything created by queer and trans poc, particularly Black queer ppl, white trans ppl (regardless of gender, and regardless of whether they "believe" in this form of oppression or not) have coopted these theories and dominated these conversations, such that both "sides" of the "discourse" are divorced entirely from the racial connotations in which these theories were created, and the ways in which they were created specifically as an intervention against white feminism, and to highlight the ways multiple marginalizations affect the marginalization of masculinity. these are theories that explicitly interact with and can only be understood in conjunction with transmisogyny, as well as other oppressions like racism and misogynoir.
*"anti-transmasculinity" as a term and theory was coined by Black trans folks (some of whom's writings are linked below), and is specifically a theory within the context of Black transfeminism antiBlackness, and transmisogynoir, and cannot be divorced from that context. i try be very intentional about my use of the terms 'anti-transmasculinity' and 'transandrophobia' in different places here, because i do not want to dilute the former’s very particular context.
anyway, here's a list of miscellaneous writings on the subjects, with a priority for collecting writing from trans poc (not all of the authors are tpoc, but this list was intended to prioritize tpoc voices). the intention of this is not to be a be-all end-all on the subject, nor exalt any one of these individuals or pieces as exclusively ~correct~ or whatever, but to combat the whitewashed nature of these discussions online, and raise awareness to the myriad of people speaking on this subject. (nor do i claim to speak for any of them, or claim that any of them speak for me. i tried to make sure i didn't platform blatant racists, zionists, transmisogynists, or other bigots, but i'm not pretending to be 100% accurate about that.)
they aren't in any particular order (except the first one, which i think is an extremely foundational text for anti-transmasculinity theory as delineated by its creators, within the context of antiblackness and transmisogyny, and necessary reading to understand anti-transmasculinity as a theory). I tried to group all the links from the same authors together.
This is a non-exhaustive list! I will likely come back and add more writings as I find them. please feel free to recommend to me any works to include (including your own! especially if you yourself are a Black trans person or a trans POC).
Now with an Archived Read-more Link!
Racial-Class Paternalism and the Trojan Horse of Anti-transmasculinity by Nsámbu Za Suékama. if you read nothing else from this list, read this.
“But even as TME struggles escape the mainstream imagination, they persist, and are often both fueling and being fueled by the war on trans women and transfeminine people. Nothing makes this clearer than in how a Western binary system triangulates that war with Anti-transmasculinity. This is why I say that Anti-transmasculinity is a Trojan horse for Transmisogyny. Like the wooden horse in the Greek myth, it might not seem like what it is, for its actual contents and character are invisible, but at the heart of it, there is a violent campaign going on that is key to how the West aims to lay seige to its civilizational "enemies." And, like the walls of the city of Troy, materialist transfeminism has fortified the opposition to Western domination, in such a way that to overcome the stronghold requires a new strategy for the Man, one that follows up the open and vicious attacks on TMA people with a different, more hidden form of warfare.”
“today’s gender paternalism frames any manhood and masculine embodiment outside of (western) cisheteronormativity as not just biologically illegitimate but also the result of a barbaric threat to civilization. And who typically figures as the face of that barbarism but the Black trans woman? Materialist transfeminism has to theorize Anti-transmasculinity.”
"Non-Men", maGes, and Black Masculinities by genderfugitive / disrupthehuman
One such argument, which is really a collection of arguments but can be consolidated into one, is that trans men are attempting to take a place alongside cis men in the hierarchy of patriarchy. In other words, while they may not have been so before naming themselves as trans men, they are aspiring to be oppressors. This employs a number of rhetorical devices that I have identified before including the idea that trans men are “betraying” cis womanhood and therefore should be seen as threats unless they act as footsoldiers for transmisogyny. The problem with this is that it treats trans manhoods as embodiments that exist as something which merely aspires to be cis manhood.
"For Those Seeking Fight or Flight: Black Trans*feminist Nihilism" / primer on transmisogynoir by genderfugitive / disrupthehuman (not about anti-transmaculinity specifically (though it does come up), but a very good + important read on Black transfeminism & transmisogynoir, so I'm including it)
anti-transmasculinity needs its own theorizing outside of general "transphobia" by genderfugitive / disrupthehuman
anti-transmasculinity & antiblackness inherently linked (& another) both by genderfugitive / disrupthehuman
There is a hidden epidemic of violence against transmasculine people by Orion Rodriguez
a thread master post linking to multiple threads about anti transmasculinity by Salem L. Void / thewarmvoid
a thread on anti-transmasculinity as an epistemic injustice (translated) originally by magicspeedwagon in French; English translation by Salem L. Void / thewarmvoid
Not transmasc invisibility, but erasure by Salem L. Void / thewarmvoid
Girlboy Boygirl Blues - antitransmasculinity as a denial of individual history & more by Salem L. Void / thewarmvoid
"irl we just kiss" - ‘transmasc vs transfem’ discourse & reactionary ‘boys vs girls’ politics in trans spaces by Salem L. Void / thewarmvoid
transmascs & being treated as predatory by Salem L. Void / thewarmvoid
transmasc mental health statistics by Salem L. Void / thewarmvoid
violent anti-transmasculine hate crimes by Salem L. Void / thewarmvoid
thread on examples of systemic anti-transmasculinity by magicspeedwagon
a thread on anti-transmasculinity and its erasure by storyjunkie
anti transmasculinity & transmisogyny and the degendering of Black people by afrodykee
anti transmasculinity & transmisogyny cannot be theorized in opposition to each other by afrodykee
white transfeminism's anti-transmasculinity by afrodykee
Black trans people & erasure of TPOC voices from the trans community by thatspookyagent
transmasculine nonwhite expereince by thatspookyagent
trans men being silenced by thatspookyagent
queer POC being pushed out of conversations by thatspookyagent
cis women's harm to trans men by novascotioducktoller w/ addition about TMOC by thatspookyagent
medical violence in anti transmasculinity by Caleb / sethpuertoluna
example of medical anti transmasculinity by Dominick / transguyenergy
response to inclusion of a trans man in an ad (thread) by Dominick / transguyenergy
anti-transmasculinity around periods by Dominick / transguyenergy
anti-transmasculinity towards pregnant trans men by Dominick / transguyenergy
transitioning as a transmasc of color by gendercriminals
white (cis) women & racist transandrophobia by dead-lavender-society
transandrophobia as an indigenous trans man by petrichorvoices
examples of transandrophobia by transvermin
the “lost lesbian” narrative & antitransmasculinity by vaguefiend
cis women & transandrophobia by vaguefiend
intersectionality & transandrophobia by visible-schizo-spectrum
more transandrophobia from cis women by cock-holliday
tl;dr : there’s LOTS of theory and discussions out there abt anti-transmasculinity, transandrophobia, how these things relate to other forms of transphobia, how it interacts with other marginalizations, most especially race, and the ways in which it affects transmascs. this information is everywhere. it’s out there. y’all (white ppl) are just refusing to engage with it.
#trans#lgbtq#queer#transphobia#transandrophobia#anti transmasculinity#transmisogyny#racism#long post#quasartalks#been compliling this for ages but i think it's finally at a point where i feel comfortable posting it#like i said though it is very much subject to change! i would love to add more things to this#it is extremely shitty that discussions on antitransmasculinity and transandrophobia have been dominated on here by racist yt ppl and their#token trans poc that they so clearly are just using as a shield against when ppl call them out on aforementioned racism.#anyway. dont bother clowning on this post i will just block <3#so much of this 'discourse' boils down to: transmascs and trans men (esp transmascs of color) saying: 'hey i experience this thing'#and other ppl (esp white ppl!) going 'no you don't.' it's so blatant lmao#it's just the complete denial of our Authority to talk about our own experiences. we are not trusted to be authorities on our own lives.#which. where have i heard that before. smells like racism. smells like misogyny.#also bc ppl can't read: none of this means transmascs have it worse than transfemmes; that transfemmes oppress transmascs; or that these#-experiences ONLY happen to transmascs. those are all extremely bad faith readings of these discussions.#AND ALSO to the (especially white) transmascs who also can't read and take these discussions as excuses to be racist & transmisogynist:#we cannot combat transandrophobia & anti transmasculinity without combating transmisogyny. they are linked.#anyway. good night
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chirpsythismorning · 3 months
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Just remembered that Will sat on the icebox in the van for the 30 hr ride back to Hawkins
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#byler#stranger things#that willelmike dynamic in the van after the monologue needs to be studied under a microscope#like why couldn’t we see the aftermath of his monologue???#what happened??#when will sat on the icebox did el and mike look confused??#did they offer to leave room for him to sit there but he declined politely like no that’s okay…#followed by the next 30 hrs of awkward#I know the vibes were OFF#that’s the reason they only let us be confronted with them by the time they arrived in Hawkins#they needed to shift the mood to confusion about Hawkins’ state#bc they could not reveal what the vibes were like before that#no but the prospects of el hugging all of them after saving max#and it’s like emotional and they’re all so relieved she’s alive#but then shortly after that when they’re planning going back to Hawkins#she’s distant again#maybe it’s with everyone so they just brush it off as her needing time to process everything#but it’s still suspicious because…#why are things with her and mike still feeling very off#and then that’s when they’re getting into the van and then will just adds to the awkwardness even more by sitting on the icebox 😭#I also noticed 2 pillows on the backseat so it’s likely that’s where byler slept in s4 during their shenanigans#so I’m guessing that where el and mike slept while Will slept on the floor 😭#no but seriously they could not show any of that without giving it all away#the angst and heartbreak and confusion and regret would have been so loud 😅
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blueskittlesart · 2 months
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atla live action generally sucks for all the reasons everyone is saying it sucks and i am in no way a live action remake promoter but one thing i will say. they Get the fire siblings. they understand.
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57sfinest · 1 year
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calling harry a “can opener” was SUCH a good play for so many reasons i think about it every day.
in the context of his work, it makes him a tool. as many people have pointed out, including martin luiga, part of the hdb tragedy is that he simply cannot leave the force, and his superiors know that and are using it to their advantage. no matter what happens, even if harry hated every nanosecond of every bit of the work and wanted to leave, he can’t and won’t leave. they can leverage anything they want against him and then reel him back in with a facade of kindness when they “allow” him to keep his job, as long as he does what they want him to. the 41st knows he has this inexplicable talent with people and they use him for it. he’s a cop: that talent can be used in so many awful ways, to push so many different agendas. and they won’t even be his own. a can opener has no particular desire to open a can, aside from maybe the satisfaction of fulfilling a purpose. a can opener has no agency, it’s just a tool for someone else to use to get what they want. and he’s learned to be okay with being used as long as it means he gets to stay. his complacency with this system makes him guilty even if he’s also being harmed by it.
but in the context of his personal life you kind of... flip it. the people around him are going to be opened up whether they want to be or not, and it’s terrible for his relationships. it’s shown that the questions, the prying- the can-opening- it’s become inextricable from who he is as a person. it’s like he doesn’t know how else to communicate, except it’s hardly communication when you’re just ripping people open. he’s invasive as all hell, although whether he means to be is debatable. he’s the kind of person that wants to take things apart to see what makes them tick. he dissects people, but really that’s too delicate of a word for what he does; if he doesn’t get what he wants right up front, he’ll abandon all subtlety and go for brute force. if he can’t get your screws loose he’ll just smash you on the ground and pick through your pieces until he’s satisfied, and if what he did to you isn’t fixable? oh well, there are other cans to open. 
and he’ll use it for personal gain: we already know he is (was?) manipulative. once he knows how you operate, he knows how to make you keep him. he can yell or he can cry; he can threaten you or he can threaten himself; he can be completely suffocating or he can withdraw completely; he can be an incorrigible liar or brutally honest; he can present himself as a threat or a joke or a talent. he’s a chimera- that’s why he’s got this inexplicable magnetism, even when people know they shouldn’t like or trust him. fidelity of character means nothing to him. he’ll be whatever he needs to be as long as it gets him what he wants. the can-opening is just his way in.
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every time new people come into a fandom that's like 5+ years old they're like damn why is no one talking about topic (usually something that started fandom wars, led to mass blockings, loss of friends) and then proceed to mention it Once and then move on never to speak of it again and then regurgitate the same posts that have been going around for the past 5 years like they're a genius and tumblr user mpregcharacterx didn't say it better and first 5 years ago but i remember, i was there, gandalf
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anendoandfriendo · 17 days
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Us seeing anyone use the word straight in place of the word non-queer: quck how do you feel about transhet people?
You probably assumed binary transhets, what if they say they are transhet because they're an obscure xenogender without much of a chance of finding someone using that label so all attraction is straight to that individual?
Also how do you feel about the split attraction model and how do you feel about acespec and arospec folks?
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puppyeared · 4 months
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37
37: share a secret
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send me a number!! 💌
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pkmncenterguy · 5 days
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Power Seal?
what's that?
Ever wonder why you hear ancient stories about wild raging tyranitar burning villages to the ground, but in trainer battles on tv, a well trained lycanroc can get hit by a hyper beam from one and still be standing? Type advantage aside, thats thanks to power seals!
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A standard diagram of a heal ball here. The blue rim, in different colors but in all pokeballs, is where your power seal is. PSA: If you ever notice a crack in that, GO TO YOUR NEAREST POKEMON CENTER IMMEDIATELY! Trade machines can exchange the same pokemon to another empty pokeball, and if you tell a nurse joy its because the seal is broken they’ll transfer your pokemon to a new pokeball for free
But anyway, power seals do exactly what it sounds like: they limit the power of a pokemon’s moves, so that in battles you can only ever knock out your opponents pokemon, and that a trainer’s togedemaru shocking you on accident wont literally kill you. Some people forget because they grow up around pokemon owned by trainers, but wild pokemon are way stronger than we give them credit for. Seriously, we don’t tell kids to avoid the tall grass for nothing. A power seal on your pokeball breaking means your pokemon is suddenly at its full power and very likely to actually hurt other pokemon in battles, so you need to get the pokeball replaced immediately
And if it worries you, pretty much all wild pokemon are aware that being caught means their power being limited, even if they don’t know exactly how. Thats why even the sweetest wild garchomp you have a bond to likely won’t just agree to be caught, lots of pokemon want a battle before you can catch them because they want you to prove you’re stronger than the power they’d be giving up
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hellofeternity · 8 months
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ORV transcends language | how ORV is kind to readers (1.1k words)
the difficulties in analyzing text are already numerous without a language barrier, the way one word can mean 5 things and when you put it in a sentence suddenly it can mean 50 things and put that sentence in a paragraph? go further and put that paragraph in a page? construct a whole world around it, weave it into the fabric, and suddenly you are painting with words.
ORV is a daunting text, it calls and references so many mythos world wide, greek, roman, indian, chinese, japanese, it plays with meaning and intent and uses gaps in our knowledge like weapons, making us extrapolate our own meaning between the sentences, it is a tome of knowledge when it comes to histories and philosophies it feels at times like I will never understand all these things inside it.
One of the difficulties of reading a translated text is that when we analyze a text the authorial intent weighs very heavily in our minds, sure we can immerse ourselves in the world but once we start picking apart at the threads we hit a wall pretty soon when we start asking ourselves "what did the author mean by this?" however in a translated text there is an obvious gap, a game of telephone, did the translator actually capture the authors intent? or are we just reading the translators perception? sadly I don't know korean, and I cant say I have the drive to learn it, as such I know there will forever be a side of ORV that I will never be privy to - however I am bilingual and had the pleasure of reading two translated versions of ORV, an English translation and an Arabic translation, I didn't finish reading the said Arabic translation but a couple things stood out to me when I briefly did ORV is very kind to readers, following along in other stories can seem confusing at times, the pacing might be too fast and you might miss some details in a characters actions, the wording might be too vague and ah damn 20 pages later you realize you don't actually know why the characters are doing what they are doing. A big writing adage that you will see a lot is "show dont tell" and it holds merit, but ORV doesn't subscribe to it, because ORV shows AND tells. ORV built a world around readers and reading, and it makes sure that there is clarity every step of the way on what is happening, first by starting out as a homage to the isekai genre, and not deviating too much at the start, making the readers feel at home in a worldview they are familiar with, systems, leveling, videos games etc, and when it starts deviating it explains things with clarity that no matter how bad the translation is you understand the general intent, and secondly by being VERY blatant about the names of things and having a built in "story" system that is built on common story tropes and names the themes for you! take for example "unbroken faith" and "Blade of faith" both of these are two translated versions of dokja's sword. I will never know which one is closer to the original authorial intent, but I can tell you something, dokja's sword is symbolism to the faith he is wielding. (CH386 vague spoilers) or the entirety of "the great war of saints and demons" being about the concept of good and evil fighting and how kimcom aren't just above being good and evil, they are both. By using story tropes that we are familiar with to explain the complexity of situations in a simple forms you no longer have to worry about losing you readers understandings through language barriers. Every story in the world in every language knows what good vs evil is, every language has the words to explain them. and therein lies the beauty of ORV. But of course this isn't to say translations don't matter, it does speak to the strength of an original texts clarity when it accounts for the big things by making them simplified, but when we get down to the nitty gritty it starts to lose form take for example
"Tell me, you fool. If I continue to regress, will I ever get to meet you again?"
this person here has a great write up explaining the translators thoughts behind this specific line
but it has spawned a lot of debate in the English speaking fandom, as to the strength of its translation, I remember when I first saw someone claiming that its a mistranslation and "you fool" isn't part of the original, my first thought was "and so?" I do not mean to be dismissive to the original text, but I do not exist in a space where I can appreciate it in the original korean, I do not exist in a worldview where I can understand the historical implications of a lot of the characters, and even when I try to research it in English sadly the resources do not exist yet and its even more laughable to think of finding these things in Arabic. (Goryeos first sword doesn't have an English wikipedia page as a clear example) a lot of people have issues with the most popular English fantranslation of ORV - and I can understand why, being bilingual I have a lot of opinions on how a lot of things SHOULD be translated most of the time, and have done my own translation work but as I sit and think about this popular translation I cant help but just feel love for it, it might be lacking to some, it might be inaccurate at times to others, but its just enough for me to paint the gaps in the text with my perceptions, the words used are tied to my affections the Arabic translation of ORV is clunky, it is messy, it doesn't have as much grace as the English translation of ORV does, the words barely string together cohesively, but it has enough clarity, enough intent, and enough love for its readers, to catch their hearts, their attention and their energy
and so I want this to be the first post on this blog because, the author is dead here, not because I buried them, but because the tower of babel fell down a long time ago, and all we have is rubble and each other. a lot of the analysis on this blog will try to be respectful to the korean original wherever it can, however my words will be coming from an anglosphere perspective, and build on other English reader's perceptions of a text translation that a decent amount of people don't think is adequate, but just like ORV is kind to us, we can be kind back, I will quote the most popular version because its what connects us together, and while the authors intent might be lost, we can share our own meanings with each other, and build our own intent from the rubble.
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goldkirk · 2 months
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I opened Pinterest for the first time in months.
That made me realize a lot about how bad I was actually doing and how much of a Waffle House Index use of Pinterest is for adult me, apparently.
I hadn’t realized it had grown that foundational to me in a healthy-brain-exercise-and-hobby-joy way. Nice to know moving forward! It’s another sign I can keep track of and use to spot correlation/indicator patterns earlier my behavior.
I love this kind of thing, it makes me so excited!
#personal data hacking is my passion#someday I’ll tell a story about the most notable times I tracked things or hacked my own mental processes from childhood to now#including the fear of spiders and bed wetting and behavior changes and posture and heart rate and cursive and putting kitchen items and#trash away as soon as I’m finished using them instead of never ever or ages and ages later#I’m so proud of that#you have to give it time and still commit. chaining thoughts and routines and behaviors really works#we are not separate brains and bodies and external environments#anyway I’m gonna go haha I used up he last of my energy burst on Discord and here and I need to go rest and lie on the floor and probly doze#love you all be back soon bye mwah!#add to journal#trauma evolution#my Waffle House index#this is going to be a fun new tag I’m so going to have fun with this and I bet it’ll be a helpful example reference for other people too#more than just for future me!#so excited so proud of myself so happy so grateful for hope about me really trusting that my ability and my behavior and my performance#are able to and going to yes keep getting better#long many-milestone path-journeys of potential#like when I was a little 6-7 year old kid-team athlete looking ahead at a concept of a future with me over time getting#stronger and cleverer and faster and slicker and calmer and even happier and more and more capable and able to accomplish!#a gift. all this time I didn’t think I’d have and have been living anyway is such a gift.#knowing that I truly have future time to grow and explore and change and improve in even though I still can’t FEEL or IMAGINE that future#time yet. also a gift.#the time I will one day realize I can imagine a future and imagine myself alive? will be a gift.#breath is a gift. experiencing life is a gift. other life is a gift. rhythm is a gift. motion is a gift. awake is a gift. color is a gift.#such a great expanse. all of it new. all of it eternal. all of it me. all of it nothing I’ve ever known before. all of it all of it#all of it. gifts.#gonna go have floor time now. this would be such a nice time to re-re-regain my ability to cry!#mwah I love you future me. take care of your hand and thank u for writing all this down 💛#hey little star whatcha gonna queue?#my poetry
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araneitela · 12 days
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Me staring at test results: It makes so much sense for her, but if I don't specify or elaborate, then we end up with the fanon take. Ugh, how do I easily explain that if you look at the word 'sex' through a much more old-fashioned lens instead of the modern one, that you'll get a vastly different picture of it?
/takes angycat.png typing to my tags
#[ ooc. ] don't try to make it logical or edit your soul according to the fashion. rather; follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.#[ post-it. ] in a way; you are poetry material. you are full of cloudy subtleties I am willing to spend a lifetime figuring out.#[ i'm so tired. i need to write a post on this or something. and somehow add it to my pinned. in some way. ]#[ 'sex' and 'seduction' are /not/ wrong in my opinion. HOWEVER-- they are /very wrong/ if we go by modern labels and perception. ]#[ god the horror of writing a muse that is so interlaced in a modern world; setting and culture but seems to /ooze/ something archaic. ]#[ this level of refinement isn't of our times in my opinion. these things that she loves aren't commonly loved nowadays. ]#[ there's so much about her that is old-fashioned to me and it's so in my face. and yet fanon doesn't see it. ]#[ i can't believe i'm an old millennial who's screaming boomer or older things. ]#[ but like can we acknowledge that sex in today's age isn't the same as it used to be? not /always/ but more generally so. ]#[ can we acknowledge that /seduction/ didn't always mean what people see it to mean now? ]#[ can we acknowledge that the FEMME FETALE TROPE HAS CHANGED /LEAGUES/ since the 2000s? ]#[ which is my biggest beef actually. and maybe all of my frustration plays into this most. it's that the femme fatale now is sexualized. ]#[ while that is /not/ what the femme fatale used to be. kafka plays into the old school femme fatale so well. film noir days. ]#[ i had this same struggle on yelan where they make VERY OBVIOUS draws to it by her music in her trailer. god; the jazz. ]#[ but kafka suffers from this so very much as well to a point where i don't dare to call her a femme fatale because then it's fanon. ]#[ the fanon i hate so much. ]#[ but just uuuughhhh. UGHHH. it's so much to explain. ]
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