#why can't i just be like the other people i see in the npd tags that are like. 'yay minor compliments' | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

saey707 · 6 months

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*heavy breathing* pls, feed my thirst with a little heartsteel kayn pls I need him -I-I need to read some yandere heartsteel kayn *coughs* I can't breath I need him to be angry at me for his own feelings omg omg I need it I need the water

✿ Prompt: Kayn is a toxic boyfriend ✿

♡ champion focus: kayn ♡ tw: npd, yandere ♡ Gender-neutral reader

Author's Note: Your request made me laugh so hard that I had to respond as soon as possible LOLOL ૮꒰⸝⸝> ̫ <⸝⸝꒱ა I'm always down for writing toxic yandere boys! So let's get into Kayn ٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و ♡ Enjoy!

Most days, you couldn't help but feel like you were trapped in a relationship with Kayn. Yes, you loved him, hell you even accepted him the way he was... But really, that was only because you feared what he could if you did try to speak up.

The warning signs were always there- People constantly reminding you... no, warning you that Kayn was toxic. But, you chose to ignore them. You wanted to believe there was some degree of good inside of Kayn. You wanted to love him like no one did before. You tried to convince yourself that you could even change him!

However, seeing Kayn in all his selfish, narcissistic colors made you realize far too late that you were stuck with him... and Kayn loved the power he had over you.

He loved having control over your shared relationship and felt like he could do as he pleased whenever he pleased. Time and time again Kayn would exercise unscrupulous control and influence over you. And you let him.

The control issues Kayn harbored at the beginning of your relationship were small. So much so, that you believed he was just obsessive-compulsive. He spoke devilish whispers that persuaded you to do things you would never do. He had you wrapped around his finger. He had you in his possession. His trap.

And as the devil's web unwound, it was only a matter of time before he was only just beginning to control every aspect of your life, from deciding what you wore out to events together to who you spoke to.

"I saw Aphelios looking at you the other day. You shouldn't trust him. You never know what the intentions of the quiet ones are..."

"I heard what Yone said to you the other day. You shouldn't listen to him... He has no idea how happy we are together!"

"I don't want you talking to Ezreal anymore!"

While the rest of the band felt it was wrong to enable Kayn, they kept quiet. They kept their distance when you all were alone. Because Kayn knew as much about them as he knew about you. And Kayn wasn't afraid to abuse the information he knew he sabotage all of them if they crossed him and his relationship.

The only sigh of relief you ever had was when the group performed interviews out of the country. Even though you could tag along, you chose not to. You made the excuse that you had work, and that saved you every time. Work was the only thing you had in your life that gave you some sense of control. Kayn couldn't take that away from you... yet, at least.

"Why aren't you texting me back? Are you listening to me?!" "Answer right now!!" "You're seriously going to put your phone on mute this long?! Who the hell do you think you are?!!" "Fine then. You did this to yourself. Keep that in mind." "LMAO" "When I get back you better hope that I'm fucking happy!!"

And he made sure to let the world know how frustrated he was.

"So Kayn, how is your relationship with your partner? You both are still together right?!" The interviewer happily questioned, your boyfriend playing the part, showing off that devilishly smug smile in front of his awestruck audience.

It made you feel sick to your stomach. It made you dread what he was about to say and what he could say.

"Oh, we are! Things between us are better than ever. We're both so happy..." His smile fell. "But..." He began to brood, looking off to the side for a moment. The audience ate up his vulnerability.

"They get so busy with work sometimes. I just wish they could respond to me sooner! Babe, if you're watching this, answer me!! Ahahaha!!" His smile returned, the others trying to hide their discomfort with joyful laughter.

"Well, I'm sure they'll be happy to see you when you get back Kayn. Don't be so discouraged!" The interviewer reassured him, Kayn rubbing the back of his neck, staring forward at the camera. Staring forward at you.

That was the telltale sign: That you were absolutely, most positively, fucked.

#saeybaewrites #request #short #headcanons #heartsteel kayn #kayn #heartsteel kayn x reader #heartsteel x reader #kayn shieda #shieda kayn #kayn lol #x reader #kayn league of legends x reader #kayn league of legends #kayn lol x reader #kayn shieda x reader #shieda kayn x reader #lol x reader #league of legends x reader

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narcissisticpdcultureis · 9 months

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im super sorry if this isnt the place to ask for advice but i wanted to know if it seems like i have npd or not (i do have bpd and hpd)

reasons why i might have it: it takes me a super long time to realize when i fucked up, i have daydreams of saving people and being a hero and being cooler than i am, i have main character syndrome /lh, when i'm hurting and other people are hurting i tend to center my pain even if they're hurting worse, my view of myself depends very heavily on what others think of me, i have dated no less than 3 people for the sole reason that they liked me/asked me out and i wanted to feel loved even if they werent really my type

reasons why i might not have it: at least every three days i have a big breakdown where i hate myself an incredible amount, i have high empathy which is likely because of autism

heyo! unfortunately i can't diagnose you or tell you if you have NPD or not, but i will say i do relate to some of what you've mentioned here (though tbf, i have BPD and HPD as well 😭.) it is also possible that the things you've listed here are due to your BPD and HPD. being in the same cluster BPD, HPD, and NPD absolutely can share traits among themselves and imo, the things you've listed here seem like they could be attributed to either your BPD or HPD.

if you still have concerns thoughs, it'd probably be best to look deeper into resources about NPD to see if you meet the criteria. i can link some posts that may be helpful:

this is a post that explains the diagnostic criteria of NPD, basically giving examples and elaborating on on what each symptoms means/how it can present. i will say this most likely isn't an exhaustive list and each symptoms can show up in different ways than listed in the post, but it's a good post for getting an idea of what the symptoms look like in action.

this is a checklist and basically elaboration of the diagnostic criteria. all the information in this checklist is things pulled from the DSM itself.

i also have a resources tag with other helpful things if you'd like to check that out!

i do also want to put out that while having no or low empathy is very common in people with NPD, it's not diagnostically required. the primary host of our system is an NPD symptoms holder and they actually had consistently very high empathy for the first around 13ish years of our life. things changed because of trauma and they now have more low or fluctuating empathy, but their high empathy at the time existed along side their NPD symptoms.

edit: i wanna make a little correction! sorry, it's been a sort of a long day and my dissociated ass seems to have forgotten what the critera says. so, from what i'm getting, a lack of empathy is in the criteria, but i will say it's still possible to have high or average empathy with NPD. you only need to meet 5 of the 9 criteria to be diagnosed and you may just not fit that criteria while fitting the others.

#not culture #npd #actually narcissistic #actually npd #narcissistic personality disorder #cluster b

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overmorrowpine · 1 year

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pinned post moment

hi! we're theo or sundry, an endogenic system of, as of last headcount, Officially A Fuckton. he/him pronouns default, or ask

will post/reblog: httyd, mcyt of Many different kinds, warrior cats, tma, silt verses, malevolent, good omens, percy jackson, wings of fire...honestly just many things. also chickens. so many chickens. & wasps too wasps r beloved

(check out our warriors-inspired project over at @wayward-wilds)

i will block you if:

- you're racist/queerphobic/ableist etc, this is probably obvious but yknow

- you're an empty blog (i will think you're a bot)

- you have anything hp related in your header/bio/url/anything

- you're anti-kin

also, please dni if you don't mask or do other things for covid precautions. this is the only thing that i can't Tell from a blog unless they outright say it, hence why it's not a "i'll block you if"

this blog supports:

- endogenic systems (systems who formed for reasons other than trauma)

- ANY AND ALL good faith identities (including mspec lesbians, including people with brainweird and strange identities, including people with contradictory identities. ALL OF THEM.)

- any and all neurodivergencies (including the super stigmatized stuff, like npd (hii) or schizophrenia or paraphilias (as long as you're not hurting anyone i don't fuckin care))

our stance on ship discourse is: tag your shit and we'll do just fine, or, see this post

if you self-identify as an anti, we will probably block you. if you think it's okay to harass, suicide bait, report stories or art of fictional characters to real life abuse hotlines, or spam report people, we will for sure block you.

tagging system:

#sundrops - stuff i say

#[name] tag - friends :]

#writings, #adult tips, #things to do when bored, #friend talk - all probably self-explanatory

#[trigger] tw - how we tag triggers

#[identifier] tag - (jewish, brainqueer, alterhuman, disability, etc) stuff that fits under that category that relates to me

#reblogging for [name] sundry - something that the current fronter thought another headmate would like

also, don't mind the tags at the bottom of the post, it's stuff i want easy access to

#chicken tag #writings #things to do when bored #posts that i have collected #fave #save

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alostlittleriverlotus · 2 years

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Random thoughts:

People who use "narcissistic abuse" always say it's to help their trauma. But all they do is try to demonize their abusers and possibly "harm narcissists." Look how much is about how to harm or hurt narcissists. Hurting someone to make up for your hurt?

I just notice a lot of people that use narcissistic abuse are looking more for revenge or to make their abusers hurt like them which just feels like the opposite of healing. I get it, I've been there, I've felt that too. It can't be helped, but you gotta realize that's not the way to go.

And this isn't whether or not their abusers have NPD, that literally doesn't matter. It feels like the people that use that tag ultimately just try to hurt their abuser or people that remind them of the abuser (which they assume is NPD and I've seen ASPD thrown under the bus as well) as some way to have control.

And I've been there my dude. I've wanted to feel control and make myself big. But the fact is that diagnosing them isn't going to make up for the abuse. Getting revenge, hurting them, doing things to purposefully upset them isn't going to make up for the abuse. Blaming strangers you see as bad cause they have the same disorder you've diagnosed your abuser with isn't going to help.

I've mentioned before, but ADHD and GAD became triggers for me after my abuse with my ex boyfriend. Because he'd use them as excuses when I called him out and lead to how he manipulated me. So much so that I would use the term ADD and hated being diagnosed with GAD a few months after leaving him. But even in my dislike, I never considered that others were bad cause of those disorders. It's like how his name became a trigger for me. I've seen people that look like him, have his name. And part of me did want to project my feelings onto them, but the reality is they're just some innocent person I see. Just because someone has a disorder, a name, or anything that reminds you of your abuser doesnt make them bad.

Hurting narcissists isn't the way to go about it either. Even if your abuser does have NPD, it doesn't mean you should use that against them. The best thing is to always try to get away. Hurting them won't make the hurt inside you less. I don't know why people who use the term "narcissistic abuse" are always so fixated on that or that people with NPD are all bad. Especially since if their abusers did have NPD, it would be somewhat probable they would get it too.

I just find that people who use "narcissistic abuse" are either the people who want to hurt their abusers to make their pain manageable or young folks/people that are just learning they were abused and fall down this toxic rabbit hole of "narcissist bad and abusive."

I'll give a chance to people willing to learn, but there are those that won't be convinced. And if you can't see the harm in using "narcissistic abuse" and how much it harms the mentally ill and those with NPD then uh, just don't bother being near me. Cause no good ever comes from demonizing a group of thousands of people because of your abuse.

Also they insanely dehumanize people with NPD. Like saying they have no soul, feel no emotions, have dead eyes, are not fully human, etc. Which I've been told too cause of my BPD. But people who use those tags are so quick to feel like everyone is their enemy or trying to deny them something. Which i think just shows more how those people need healing and actual help and not to fall further down the rabbit hole of "narcissists are abusive" because if only becomes an echo chamber of that. Even in the tag itself, it harms the victims/survivors and feels like it doesn't have their best interests at heart. So it's literally no good for anyone and harms pretty much everyone.

So there's some random thoughts and things I've noticed in people who use that term. If you believe narcissistic abuse is real or valid, just go. You can try to learn, but if you're not willing to, you can just leave. Cause this place is safe for those with NPD and ASPD and any fucking demonized disorder. And if you think all of em are bad or evil or abusive, you are not welcome here.

Love to everyone with disorders! Unknown, lesser known, lesser researched, more well-known, demonized, well researched disorders, whatever. Personality disorders, dissociative disorders, mood disorders, whatever. You're all welcome here and loved and valid.

Edit: One last thing. I also see them say that "narcissist is separate from narcissistic personality disorder" but then I also see those accounts that post about "narcissistic abuse" put narcissistic personality disorder in the tags 😐 and even if it's not in the tags, it comes up when searching for the disorder. Y'all. Come on.

#npd #narcissistic abuse #narc abuse #narc abuse isn't real #narcissistic abuse isn't real #demonization of npd #demonization of aspd #demonization of personality disorders #stigma #personality disorders #this one is specifically about npd but I see similar sentiments for aspd a lot too and some for bpd #we all fucking deserve better #narcissistic #narcissist #narcissistic personality disorder #npd positivity #no disorder in abusive #no disorder is bad

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teacup-captor · 1 year

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I have a ko-fi now. Billionares if you see this and you have a billion to spare please follow the link below

[Psst! I intend to do some more roleplaying on this account. Everything under the "#Gargoyle Leo" tag is rp!]

PLEASE SEND ME BEES. I WILL BE SO HAPPY. PUT A BEE IN MY INBOX /NF

Or send me a Sherlock (ANY ADAPTATION) to edit into a catboy!!!!

Or just tell me about your day or make random noises at me <333 infodump if you'd like omg!!! /g

Other blogs I have!!!

@teacup-crafter (creative stuff archive PLS PLS PLS SEND ME ASKS WITH SHERLOCK ART REQUESTS)

@tths-system-antics (system blog (very inactive. Sorry))

@your-fave-is-soup (gimmick blog for souping blorbos. I'm active I just don't get asks. I love souping blorbos)

@bentleysbeetle (Good Omens RP blog. Adoptive child of Aziraphale (and by proxy, Crowley) and best friends with Bentley. Dabbles in crime solving. Also- I do tarot readings there. Long story. You get a silly one and a serious one if you ask.)

@youngpoetthomasthorne (poetry + aesthetic + rp blog)

(Send art suggestions for other Sherlock Holmes media too!!!!)

Some of my posts!

Honky Tonky Jonk - Sherlock & Co. Fansonk

Sherlock & Co. discord server

Tag system:

#Gargoyle Leo - this is my tag for the Good Omens roleplay :) everything under this tag is roleplay!! Everything else is ooc :P as a general I'm only roleplaying when I'm directly interacting with other Good Omens roleplayers. My character is called Leo and uses it/they/he/she/ne pronouns. They're totally not based on anyone what are you even saying /j

#sigmord - stimboards

#trinket box - things I am saving <3 little trinkets :D

#bees for me - bees sent in my inbox or bee posts I have been tagged in

#why can't i just be normal moments - I AM NOT BEING SELF-DEPRICATING. This is my tag for unhinged things I've said (on Discord mostly, but I'm open for other things too)

#good omens season 2 spoilers - self-explanatory

#bbc ghosts 5 - bbc ghosts s5 spoilers

Trigger warnings get tagged as #tw [trigger] and #[trigger] tw just so you're covered

I also have tags for my friends. If I reblogged your post and you don't understand one of my tags it's probably bc I reblogged it from a friend

DNI:

-PROSHIPPERS/SUPPORTERS, THINSPO/PRO ED OR ANYTHING BODY FOCUSED*. I WILL NOT DISCUSS THIS GET THE FUCK OFF OF MY PAGE, YOU ARE PROMOTING SELF-HARM AND I DO NOT WANT THAT ANYWHERE NEAR ME.

(* body focused as in you post only/primarily pictures of bodies especially in a weight focused way)

-ZIONSTS/PRO-GENOCIDE/WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WANNA CALL YOURSELF F U C K OFF. THIS PAGE IS PRO PALESTINE. FUCK MY ASS IF YOU'RE NOT PRO PALESTINE

(if you don't know what's going on regarding Israel vs Palestine I'm very happy to give an explanation but I am N O T discussing this. Good people are pro Palestine.)

(If you apply for the rest of my DNI feel free to ask why or discuss calmly with me but if you start getting angry you're fucking blocked)

-Homophobes, transphobes, enbyphobes, racist, yadda yadda if ya hate people fur things they cannot or should not change fuck off right to hell

-Against therians/otherkins

-Ableists (that includes if you believe NPD or other PDs are inherently bad or use terms like "nArC AbUsE". They're people too and they can be nice.)

-Against mspec gays/lesbians, turigirls, lesboys, or other contradicting labels

-Against self-diagnosis

-Endo/t*lpa (*u) systems and their supporters (if you're respectful or syscourse neutral you can stay, just know that I'm under the belief that endo systems are either not systems or they're invalidating their own trauma. If you use labels such as "neurogenic" to say you formed from trauma bc of a mental illness, that is literally trauma and makes you traumagenic)

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boiled-dennis · 1 year

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i really liked the tags you added to my trash twins analysis! esp because you are right that not a lot of ppl in this community actually have or know much about npd, it is always super interesting to see your input on how dennis and his behavior point towards him havin npd/aspd. its refreshing seeing someone give insight on that that isnt just 'haha hes secretly a serial killer with no feelings so hes a psychopath!!!1!!' lmaooo

ahh thanks i thought your post itself was great, i really enjoy reading what people have to say about the way dee and dennis were raised , there's a lot of interesting stuff to pick up on and interpret. also so much more that could be said about dennis and personality disorders (as well as the rest of the gang), but with my current level of energy it's easiest to build off other people's observations tbh. for some reason i just started typing a shit ton of words here and i don't know why it happened, but-

it's kinda neat to me how that one common reaction that viewers have to dennis is in response to the persona we see he wants people to perceive him as (in his own desperate protective way), but we Also get to see the vulnerable, scared side of him and the way he puts on this act—and often, fans either ignore this side, or they have their sanist view of it and think it's even more evidence of him being a "psychopath". i know a lot of people do watch it only in a surface-level way, which i'm not going to criticise, but there's way more nuance to these characters than i guess a lot of people care to see. so if they are going to discuss it, i wish they'd be more thoughtful..

dennis is clearly a destructive, harmful person, but his actions don't mean he's "evil" or that he can't be a whole person with his own problems and feelings. that's one part of the show and his character that i really appreciate; i know there's been discussions in the past about this, but it's interesting how the show isnt a continuation of the all-too repeated idea that abusive people are one-dimensionally bad, purely evil, and not even people but more like. wickedness incarnate? like an entity that exists only to hurt & hate people. and there's the opinion that abusive characters shouldn't be portrayed as normal humans because that itself would somehow teach people to excuse their actions or think "but they still have some good in them", but that's more like. people's own responsibility to understand not to do. of course the gang can be cruel in cartoonish, heightened ways, but i feel with the understood rules of their world, it's not the exact same as real life actions (also the fact that they are indeed fictional characters). it's just important to have an understanding that being abusive is an active choice, and not something predestined because of personality disorders or whatever other qualities one might have!

to revisit the thing about dennis in reality vs how fans often view him- we see hints or direct portrayals of his true emotional state all throughout the show, but people insist on saying he's "emotionless"/has no feelings, even aside from his constant emotional outbursts. it's consistent with how real-life people with several cluster B personality disorders are invalidated (often seen as having contradictory symptoms/observable behaviour, and therefore faking emotions in order to be manipulative), and it's oddly kinda comforting because for me it just confirms my specific view of dennis. i just can't get over how many people who really like dennis and the show are fundamentally misunderstanding his character and insist on viewing him in a way that not only he himself is deeply hurt by (i know he isn't real btw), but also directly contradicts what we've always been shown about his real feelings, just because it fits the mould of the crazy psychopath that they want him to be. idk, sometimes it feels like people deliberately ignore some characters' complexities because they don't want their worldview to change so that they start viewing real people as equally complex and more than a stereotype.

#i saw the ask earlier and was gonna reply but people were playing a muppet record and i got distracteD #and then this took forever to type and think about #. have a Bit of an aversion to commenting on/reblogging stuff with my own thoughts but i want to be more involved in community stuff #i'm at the point where i typed the amount of words where nothing makes sense to me anymore and i question if my sentences are okay #npd dennis #aspd dennis #iasip meta #asks

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mbti-notes · 2 years

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Anon wrote: Hello. I'm a 25yo INFJ male. I've been trying different field of studies for years in vain. I know I want to feel useful to society somehow and help people or animals in meaningful ways through my job, so that's why I wanted to go in social services. However, I find myself feeling overwhelmed and struggling to keep my mental health balanced ironically. I tried many jobs and internships in an attempt to prove to myself that I'm capable to realize my goals, but I always end up having a huge mental breakdown that leads to suicidal behaviors no matter the nature of the work (although it tends to be worse if I work in a stressful and oppressing environment ofc).

Admittedly, I have many mental illnesses (bpd, npd and cptsd) that probably explain my difficulty to "live normally", but at the same time, I stubbornly don't want that to limit my potential, so I keep pushing and hoping I can reach my goals. I do not give up easily, I kept on working or studying even if it kills me but lately, I took a break from uni and after failing to keep retail job (again), I wonder if I need to let go of my goals.

If I do, I don't think I can confront the shame of being a failure. I wouldn't know what to do, what am I supposed to do with my life if I cannot achieve anything? Live from a miserable social welfare and hoping I get enough food on a daily basis? Becoming the inadequate and incapable person I fear to be and revealing that to the rest of the world?

If I don't give up and keep pushing, at least, I can't say I didn't try. I know I'll end up kill myself eventually in this path, but I'd rather conserve the few bits of pride I have in myself than cowardly giving up. This probably sounds twisted up but it feels like my existence is doomed for a life of suffering because of how deficient I am, so I might as well "suffer honorably" for my goals at least.

I still have a few months to decide whether I should give up my uni studies and my job hunting for once and for all. But tbh, I could just flip a coin and either result will be the same to me: I'll just end up trying to survive and take my own life. Sigh. As an INFJ yourself, do you have any alternative perspectives to offer? Thank you.

--------------------

Thinking in extremes is symptomatic of Se grip problems. Why do you live like you're trying desperately to prove something? Do you really like it? It's a choice you're making. There are as many ways to live life as there are people in this world. Life isn't all-or-nothing. You seem to want to believe it is because it makes you feel as though you have a purpose, or that your life isn't mundane like everyone else's, or that it makes you special instead of ordinary. This underlying egotism infects your every thought and action. When your intention is tainted at the start, you're likely to end up in self-sabotage.

There's nothing wrong with wanting to do some good in the world, but there is something wrong when you use this "mission" to define the whole of your identity or the whole of your existence. This manifestation of immature Ni+Fe points to underlying ego development problems (see the Type Dev Guide). You're merely covering up the emptiness inside when you should be building yourself up properly through developing your latent strengths, talents, and capabilities. We all have potential to fulfill, but your concept of potential is twisted by faulty beliefs.

You have deep-seated shame and self-worth issues that need to be worked out because they influence your entire worldview (these topics come up often, so search the tags). Health is the greatest wealth, and you won't get far without a stronger foundation of mental health. If you don't care well for yourself, you won't have the energy and wherewithal to care well for others. I strongly suggest that you work with a therapist to carefully correct your flawed thinking and beliefs, learn how to cope better with negative emotions like shame and guilt, and work on implementing realistic and incremental plans for the future. Your issues are treatable with therapy, but the key is that you have to want to change your way of thinking and stop clinging to faulty beliefs that don't really serve you well.

#infj #se grip #ask

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dumb-fictionkin-sideblog · 2 months

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This is meant to be informational, all of this is /info

I'm not sure if you know this but hyper-empathic people with autism aren't ableist for not liking people with narcissistic personality disorder. Yet, a lot of people who do have that type of autism (which is rare yet more common in the biologically female genome side of it), can spot people with narcissistic personality disorder very easily. This is because of common phrases which in turn make them feel unsafe. This may impact the autistic person negatively, and MAY cause long-term PTSD (C-PTSD for Complex PTSD), but that does NOT make the person with NPD an abuser. Its common for those with hyper-empathy to feel unsafe around people with NPD because they are two polar opposites of intentions on the spectrum and often get mistaken for each other by strangers. Like its common for you to immediately tell if someone is homophobic or not, its also common for people with NPD and people with HE autism to recognize each other even if those without it can't tell them apart easily. Its a common fear response and nothing more. The best thing you can do if someone seems to think that Narcissistic abuse is real and has HE autism is to tell them to talk or see a therapist, or at the very least to look up information online from credible sources. (Of course, its also good to deliver this gently as they will be defensive.) TLDR; HE autism and NPD recognize each other and don't get along well but that doesn't make it abuse or ableism. /info

This is ! a lot of great info that... does not contradict any of what I have ever said, so I'm not sure why you felt like you needed to say it (or even less why you felt like you needed to put big ol' info tone tags all around it as if it was going to be offensive)

(Guessing you're referring to that post where I said "narcissistic abuse isn't a thing and not every single person with autism is hyper-empathic")

It does sound, uh, strange to me that someone just existing would cause PTSD in another person, but I've never claimed to be an expert. Also seeing the points you're making I do think ASPD could be grouped with NPD in this as well (yknow, because of the low empathy and all) — but when I say "narcissistic abuse" doesn't exist I'm strictly talking about the term. Of course people with NPD can be abusers. People with ASD can also be abusers, but we don't call that "autistic abuse" because it'd be stupid.

I get the point with the fact that they can recognize each other more easily, but uh, no, I can't identify whether someone's homophobic or not without asking them. People have been wrong. Like, it happens a lot. You can't... say that it's a reliable way to identify someone with NPD/HE autism. Literally yesterday I had a friend at my house who has HE autism and we ended up talking about this exact topic because they called themselves a "victim of narcissistic abuse" and I nearly had a fucking stroke. When I told them I had low empathy, which happened years ago to be fair, they were surprised.

I'm very easily triggered by what you call "common NPD phrases" (if I understood that right, and if did then I'm assuming you mean something that sounds manipulative, which.... moving on) to the point that it's something I have to discuss with pretty much everyone I know because it always comes up at some point and I get triggered by something completely innocent. It's a really big problem for me. But I am far from being uncomfortable around people with NPD (or people who just have low empathy for that matter), usually because they tend to be very honest with me the moment I open up about having low empathy (usually in a "oh thank God I don't have to keep masking around you" way). I tend to feel more unsafe around hyper-empathic people, not because of "common phrases" or anything, but because I've heard them say so much shit about people like me that it's become automatic to feel wary of them (see: my best IRL friend telling me they're a "victim of narcissistic abuse" after I've already opened up to them about my own empathy issues; trying to listen to a podcast my friend is in and getting hit with a "yeah I'm a decent human being, I've got fucking empathy"; trying to explain to someone that people with ASPD aren't all serial killers and being met with "some things deserve to be demonized ❤"; etc etc.).

For these reasons I do not believe that HE autistic people feeling unsafe around people with low empathy or NPD isn't at least partially for ableist reasons, whether conscious or not. Feel free to prove me wrong, it'd be great.

#sunny #tw ableism #(for the mention. i dont think any of xhat you said was ableist in nature)#this is sad because it's generally something i like to talk about. im glad you were at least coming to me in good faith though #had an... experience a while ago talking to someone who explained that 'no no psychopathy in cognitive science is totally different-#-from the outdated term for aspd and its not linked to aspd at all! its a completely different thing!'#only for me to look it up and go on a .gov website and the first review of several studies that i see had a big intoductory disclamer #basically saying 'umm we're not sure because according to our MRIs what we have identified as psychopathy in the brain would-#-be more common than not having it with like over half of our evaluated population... but it could just be high IQ we didnt check :)'#im kind of losing faith in people who dont have low empathy just because they want 'psychopathy' to eb a thing so bad #i'd already lost faith in the field of psychiatry but. they want to separate good and bad people so bad. they want low empathy to be bad.#again im no expert but if you start your paper with 'we did this with only MRIs and the MRIs didnt have the results we want them to-#-so we're choosing to ignore it and pretend we're right anyway in this vague idea of a thing existing'... i'm not gonna believe you #just way you think people with low empathy are ~different~ and ~bad people~ but dont try to make a science paper out of it #im tired of people pretending the concept of bad people even exists and choosing that it's low/no empathy people actually.#--i do want to say that its completely valid to just feel uncomfortable around certain people for any reason at all #like we dont /have/ to all likr each other. thats not how humans work socially. some people just dont go very well together #but you cant convince me that saying ''i dont like people with this mental disorder because they make me feel unsafe'' isn't ableist at all #ask #anon

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bandofchimeras · 6 months

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hey dude, sorry not trying to be an ass w this but I saw u had a post where in the tags you used delusional and narcissist as pretty derogatory insults towards the govt. Bashing the government is good and great but using terms that we (at least currently) need to describe mental illness (and definitely associate with it!)... in ways like that... its ableist and dehumanizing and leads to more abuse, even if it feels innocent, because if everyone who's a narc or who's delusional is dangerous....that's everyone w/ npd, or a schizospec disorder, or any other things.

Sorry this is long, and again, not trying to be rude! Just wanted to inform you and ask that you maybe be a little more careful with word choice in the future :)

hey anon, yeah thanks for your concern. I do understand the movement to change language usage around mental illness and destigmatize. And it is well intentioned.

Unfortunately, narcissistic and delusional are still pretty generally derogatory words. A person with NPD may not cause harm simply by virtue of having the diagnosis but we all agree narcissism itself isn't a fun cool trait to have. Delusions are obscurations of reality.

We still say manic, depressed, obsessive, etc in both outright negative ways and descriptive but not morally loaded ways. to me it's just part of language, and the ethics of most derogatory language does depend on who's using it.

I'm absolutely behind not calling everyone who sucks a narcissist. and would like people to stop saying "I'm being OCD" or "that's so bipolar," "he's a schizo" and so on. The "delulu" trend online is weird and fetishizes mentally ill people.

For context: I am a person with a narcissistic tendency, due to my childhood. My life has been a long train of psych symptoms... delusions of grandeur, maladaptive daydreaming, hallucinations, psychosis, derealization, depersonalization, dissociative identity states. psychology is one of my longest hyperfixations simply because I needed to understand my experience. it's been helpful and unhelpful in different ways. Pathologization is a phenomen that can't be understood separately from language, culture, history, and violence.

And yet I don't really have a problem with calling things crazy, insane, or batshit. in fact I find power in redefining and playing with these terms. I've been called crazy in a demeaning, invalidating way. And yeah, I'm a lil crizazy, a bit unhinged one might say. But if a motherfucker calls me crazy to invaldiate my argument, I instantly know they've lost. They're being weak, and abusive. It will also piss me the fuck off. I may want to show them what "crazy" looks like. The better angels of my nature will whisper "keep your head."

With the movement to neutralize mental health terms, what's always confused me is the understanding of language itself. I experience words autistically - they have multiple overlapping meanings all the time. Words are like composite images composed of billions of instances of use, fluttering and evolving as they are spoken and written. Vernacular is messy, sputtering and ever changing. Therefore words carry a multitude of connotations. When different people say them in different contexts you can see and hear different implications.

So, I really don't care if a dude at work says "that's fuckin insane bro" ...to a gnarly kickflip. Or a devastating news article. Insane delineates the magnitude of his emotion. It's out of bounds. Something normies and straights would try to contain, institutionalize, label. Christ, that's juicy. It's why I adore skater boy lingo and teen slang. It's careless and crunchy.

English itself, especially corporate and institutional English, can be a strict, bland, and often abusive language. My fellow autistic homies tend to enjoy a rousing jaunt down into the annals of historical parlance for our everyday linguistic transactions because it's fucking boring, the clinical way we are expected to speak here and now.

So therefore: thanks for your message calling attention to my words and their impact.

There are deeper better more poetic words to call the government and frankly I believe the best ones might be found in other languages.

All in all, you're right that "narcissistic" and "delusional" are not the most accurate, potent words to describe the US government. How to convey the twisted, detached from reality, spirit of that entity best in language, though, I need to expand the lexicon. Maybe using these words is cheap. Maybe it covers over the intentionality and corruption at play.

So I'm going to open this up to some language play - and ask you, anon, and anyone else what words can we find to convey the negative meaning of delusional (detached from truth) and narcissistic (inverted and self concerned to the point of dysfunction), in English? or in another language?

I hope you can take this in good faith not as a deflection but really engaging with your ask.

Being language corrected can trigger my harshest defenses. I can feel in my body all the times someone has punished, invalidated, dismissed something I've said because of using "uncivil" or foul or imperfect language. In general, trying to conform to correct ideological forms of language is like, major wretched, dude.

Hell my dorky ass disingenuous nerd of a brother yesterday called a message I sent the family group chat about Palestine "blasphemous" because I said " my god" and used it as an excuse to delete every impassioned exchange we had so the "children wouldn't see," - him be racist, cough. can't make this shit up.

But that's my background. Catholicism is a mental illness. (Sorry in advance to all mental illness havers for associating you with Catholics)

#anon #language #psychology #this is also a recent change for me so its cool if anyone wants to call hypocrisy #a long road to unembodying the social justice warrior archetype of ultracorrective speech policing #which doesnt mean “freeze peach”#but rather #people are gonna say shit man #and you can tell what they mean by it #and educating people on the history of words wont change a spiteful hateful intent #i believe anon is well intentioned tho #destigmatize mental illness #but id rather energy be put towards fighting material and medical abuse in thr systems

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narcissisticpdcultureis · 2 months

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//vent, sorry, I've wanted to get this out of my chest for a while now.

suspected/questioning npd and aspd + bpd culture is wanting to become mutuals with a person you idolize, they're just so so cool and they even became one of your fps! You really want their attention and you really want to become friends with them, so you tag them in a post, asking them to become friends/mutuals with you. (in which they were nice enough to do so)

On the first hand, you were so fucking happy, like HELL YEAHHHHH IM NOW MUTUALS WITH THEM FUCK YESSSSSSSSSS I CAN LIVE IN PEACE NOWWW WOOHOOOOOO happy, I mean, who wouldn't be happy about it?

On the other hand, you feel so guilty, mad, annoyed, and disgusted of yourself because it felt so fucking demanding, they were nice enough to do it and they'll basically have to deal with a disgusting and humiliating person like you 24/7 who can't even fucking live without a tiny bit of reassurance, feeling like we're “very close friends!!!” even though it's clear that we're NOT. I should've just asked them nicely in their dms, or maybe start slowly by interacting with them a little more and they might consider being friends with you INSTEAD OF DEMANDING IT TO THEM.

But why give a fuck about it, anyway? I'm friends/mutuals with them now, I get to talk to them, I get to share everything with them and a lot more! People who like them as well might see that post eitherway and will obviously get jealous of you like they definitely should be, because I'm friends with them while you're not because you're just a fucking peasant. But you still feel guilty about it anyways.

#npd culture is #npd + bpd culture is #npd + aspd culture is #npd + bpd + aspd culture is #npd #actually narcissistic #actually npd #narcissistic personality disorder #cluster b #bpd #borderline personality disorder #aspd #antisocial personality disorder

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evilbeepthemeep · 1 year

Text

I posted 9,304 times in 2022

163 posts created (2%)

9,141 posts reblogged (98%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@agentduckorico

@sandal-shuriken-no-jutsu

@eroticcannibal

@ratsetflummi

@dappercyborg

I tagged 203 of my posts in 2022

#killing stalking - 15 posts

#eurovision - 14 posts

#mystic messenger - 6 posts

#cat - 3 posts

#unreality - 3 posts

#bum - 2 posts

#dikadoll jean - 2 posts

#dikadoll - 2 posts

#ball jointed doll - 2 posts

#soup - 2 posts

Longest Tag: 127 characters

#though to be fair we were the weird ones since i had a massive unicorn balloon that made us friends and i let people feel me up

My Top Posts in 2022:

So currently I'm stuck in bed sick and unable to do much. I've had to pay out to get paracetamol and food which gets expensive.

Since I'm on universal credit I don't have a lot of money so if you can, please send some money via my PayPal which is [email protected]

66 notes - Posted April 7, 2022

Kiwifarms is dying, reblog to make it die faster

73 notes - Posted August 25, 2022

I swear down the people who shit on mogai/aces/aros/pans etc because they used to identify as one of them but came out as lesbian/gay/binary trans just can't admit they were wrong.

they'd much rather throw a bunch of minorities under the bus than say they were wrong about who they are.

like somehow it's our fault they thought they were ace cause we "tricked" them into it when actually we just gave out resources.

it's okay to be wrong sometimes, I thought I was a lesbian but no I was ace, NB and pan. I don't blame lesbians for that, it's just the language I had for myself at the time.

being wrong is apart of growing and admitting it is so much healthier than sending death threats to people who's identity you don't like.

77 notes - Posted December 6, 2022

race is abt how ppl see u. when most ppl look at u, u look white. they cannot see into ur mom’s mixed genes before they decide whether or not to discriminate against u. there’s nothing wrong with being white. u can be white and celebrate ur mother’s heritage

First of all that's called white passing privilege which to be fair I do have to a certain degree. Like the other women at the domestic violence shelter my mum was in when she left me dad did say she was lucky we could pass but still doesn't erase the fact we weren't white

Second of all I have faced racism due to me and my family being mixed race. Details about my mother's upbringing were called stories by social workers and even an outfit worn by my grandmother on her 50th wedding anniversary was called a costume. I was literally taken from my mum and given to my abusive dad because she raised me in a very not white way

Third of all I've been an outcast my entire life due to not looking like my white peers. Hell I don't even fit into my dad's side of the family because when I stand next to any of them it's very clear I'm not white.

I've been discriminated against due to my status as a mixed race person in a country that fucking hates anyone who isn't white or performs whiteness correctly.

It's not just genes that impact how people treat you, it's also how you are raised and the people around you. I'm still as much mixed race with my green eyes and pale skin as my sister who has dark brown eyes and tab skin.

But what else do I expect from a terf who thinks biology is immutable and gender isn't a social construct

148 notes - Posted February 22, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Narc Abuse And Why It's Bullshit

Long post ahead and tw for rape apology, homophobia, transphobia and ableism

I decided on a whim to do a deep dive on who coined the term Narc abuse and the ideology used in narcissistic abuse circles.

And oh boy I found some info.

The term Narcissistic abuse was first coined sometime in the 90’s by a guy named Sam Vaknin. Notable things about this dude is he’s a writer, a philosopher, a physicist and has npd. Oh apparently he might not even have NPD and is just spouting bullshit to get away with being an unrepentant asshole.

Fun fact he was arrested and jailed for committing securities fraud in 1996.

Here’s a link to his CV.

notice anything? He holds no qualifications for psychology or psychiatry.

And even has this fun disclaimer on his website

Which means he has no credentials to talk or teach about NPD. Or Abuse. Or Domestic Violence.

I have combed through this man’s website, interviews and his medium articles and found some truly terrible shit.

He’s misogynistic

Jacobsen: You agree with First Wave Feminism and Second Wave Feminism, and disagree with Third Wave Feminism and Fourth Wave Feminism. What defines them?

Vaknin: First and second wave feminisms (in plural: there are many schools) were focused on leveling the playing field and fighting abusive and exploitative practices such as prostitution and pornography.

Starting with the suffragettes, they focused on the franchise (the right to vote), equal wages, access (to healthcare, education, the workplace, daycare), revising the dress code (“rational dress”), the right to own and dispose of property, and converting marriage from indentured bondage to an intimate, hopefully lifelong equal partnership.

The third wave was a psychopathic outgrowth. While claiming to be inclusive and permissive, it was a defiant and reckless attempt to “empower” women by eliminating all boundaries, conventions, and mores of any kind in all fields of life.

What women have garnered from the confluence of the three waves is that they should make their careers the pivot of their lives, avoid meaningful, committed relationships with men, and pursue sex as a pastime with any man.

Ironically, the third wave played right into the hands of predatory men (“players”) who took advantage of the newfangled promiscuity while assiduously avoiding any hint of commitment or investment. Third wave feminists internalized the male gaze (“internalized oppression”) and pride themselves on being “sluts”.

The fourth wave of feminism is focused on real problems such as sexual harassment, rape, and body shaming as well as intersectionality (discrimination of women who belong to more than one minority). In many ways, it is an offshoot of second wave feminism.

Quote taken from Prof. Vaknin on Misogyny and Misandry

Transphobic

Philosophically, there is little difference between a narcissist who seeks to avoid his True Self (and positively to become his False Self) – and a transsexual who seeks to discard his true gender. But this similarity, though superficially appealing, is questionable.

People sometimes seek sex reassignment because of advantages and opportunities which, they believe, are enjoyed by the other sex. This rather unrealistic (fantastic) view of the other is faintly narcissistic. It includes elements of idealised over-valuation, of self-preoccupation, and of objectification of one's self. It demonstrates a deficient ability to empathise and some grandiose sense of entitlement ("I deserve to be taken care of") and omnipotence ("I can be whatever I want to be – despite nature/God").

This feeling of entitlement is especially manifest in some gender dysphoric individuals who aggressively pursue hormonal or surgical treatment. They feel that it is their inalienable right to receive it on demand and without any strictures or restrictions. For instance, they oftentimes refuse to undergo psychological evaluation or treatment as a condition for the hormonal or surgical treatment.

It is interesting to note that both narcissism and gender dysphoria are early childhood phenomena. This could be explained by problematic Primary Objects, dysfunctional families, or a common genetic or biochemical problem. It is too early to say which. As yet, there isn't even an agreed typology of gender identity disorders – let alone an in-depth comprehension of their sources.

A radical view, proffered by Ray Blanchard, seems to indicate that pathological narcissism is more likely to be found among non-core, ego-dystonic, autogynephilic transsexulas and among heterosexual transvestites. It is less manifest in core, ego-syntonic, homosexual transsexuals.

Autogynephilic transsexuals are subject to an intense urge to become the opposite sex and, thus, to be rendered the sexual object of their own desire. In other words, they are so sexually attracted to themselves that they wish to become both lovers in the romantic equation - the male and the female. It is the fulfilment of the ultimate narcissistic fantasy with the False Self as a fetish ("narcissistic fetish").

Autogynephilic transsexuals start off as heterosexuals and end up as either bisexual or homosexual. By shifting his/her attentions to men, the male autogynephilic transsexual "proves" to himself that he has finally become a "true" and desirable woman.

Quote taken from Homosexual and Transsexual Narcissists Frequently Asked Questions # 18

Homophobic

See the full post

355 notes - Posted July 4, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

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hypnosiacon-archived · 1 year

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oh and ✈️

- 🌌 anon

Yesterday I was mindless as fuck, so here my rant about how I don't like the Fandom of my source because of personal to me and Tarn reasons.

✈️: the fact itself is yes, I don't like fandom of our source and I don't like pairings in any way, including the Fandoms I'm not into lol. The more pairings I see, the less likely I will be interested in this source.

Anyways, the long version is under the cut, have fun with this knowledge!

So first of all, yes, these reasons are silly, probably egotistical and tied to us as being from this source + npd where I'm better than all of these people + strange point in being Aroace but being a self shipper and having a "partner" in the source. Aight let's go.

First of all the pronouns. For some reason every time I see a character using she/her or they/them it's always tied to the point that they are fem or nonbinary. That is suspiciously sounds like "pronouns = gender" and I hate that rhetoric because it's false as hell. I don't mind characters using different pronouns, as I really headcanon my husband using Neos lol, but seeing how a new character is using they/them and everyone assumes they must be nonbinary is a little...suspicious. Especially since every single fem character is using she/her, but no one questions it.

Speaking of which. Did you know that the whole Fandom decided that Tarn uses she/her and is a girl? Yeah, that's okay, but for my fucking Quixote, fictive, that's fucked up. It is misgendering for him and he's literally walking on a thin fucking ice when looking for the content for himself. He CAN'T see any shit without it telling him how he's a she/her girl Lesboy etc, any fucking term that makes him anxious and angry. There's almost NO content without reminding him of this, and it makes me and him mad.

Oh and did you know that my husband got the same attention too? His humanisation for some reason is always a white blond skinny girl who's appearance just screams KAREN. And seeing how they ship him with someone who did not fucking care about his mental condition (he was literally abused hello???) and decided to make him even worse by leaving him to die because he just??? Tried to do something to finally get away from this shit???? It feels so... Misogynistic I don't know. Even Titmouse, the only human cis woman in our system, agrees with this. This is just fucked up.

Oh and how you can't look at any tag because they always ship characters? Yeah I dont fucking care how much you love this pairing etc, just fuck you at least TAG IT AS SUCH. I don't fucking care, it's just a simple thing that everyone should do because not everyone supports your ship, and everyone should be mindful of that. I hate how they ship EVERY FUCKING ONE. Just PLEASE I can't take it, there's more shipping art than there's normal art, it's making me mad. They ship anyone without a thought. I don't mind just a handful of pairings and I can list them lol, though even they have problems when looking at how Fandom depicts them. I just... I'm Aroace I can't take it fucking longer. Can I have at least something that is not a fucking pairing. I love the dynamics between these two characters, but because they are working together, because he told the other one that they need to be together (by evil means because he wanted to create a fucking chimeras) or they just looked at each other, OR NOTHING FUCKING AT ALL THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW EACH Other, EVERYONE SHIPS THEM BECAUSE OOH THEY ARE TOOOTALLY ROMANTICALLY ATTRACTED TO EACH OTHER YEAH OFC /sarc. I hate when I see why they have this ship, but I don't fucking care if they love it or not. Tag it, fucking TAG IT AT LEAST. I HAVE LITERALLY JUST ONE FUCKING ART OF THIS ONE CHARACTER BECAUSE EVERYTHING ELSE IS JUST PAIRINGS DAH

Just fucking UGH I'm tired...

Also hey did you know that two characters were abused and brainwashed to the point of "obsession" to work for their abuser, that when he told everyone that he's done and the war is over, they almost killed themselves? And you know what Fandom did? They ship them with this abuser and calls them fanboys :) I hate it so much

Talk to Tarn about it, he will tell you how much shit Megatron did to him, that he almost fucking KILLED HIMSELF because of this bitch. Yeah, now tell me that is a good Fandom, making fun of mentally ill, brainwashed and abused villains that are literally trying to fucking live. (also bonus point for hellbat who was killed because he was sure that at war everyone is killed and was trying to make his boss kill him, yeah fuck it)

#✖ ✈️ plane game #🌌 anon

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