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gay-little-bitch · 1 year

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Personal Lies pt4

pt1 pt2 pt3 Pt5

Gareths pov:

"Hey, Jeff. Eddie is gonna be dressing a little differently today. Don't ask why. Okay byeeee!" His words were quick and abrupt. Gareth is glad that the phone went to voicemail and he didn't have to get asked questions about their whore of a friend. Corroded Coffin has a gig today at the biggest venue in town and Gareth invited Robin... and Steve.

All he's trying to do is get Steve and Eddie to go backstage after the concert and become friends and then possibly more. Robin has been a good wingman for Steve but Gareth also had to do his part for Eddie. So his mind was filled with thoughts of 'what if I made Eddie more of a slut to impress Steve?' All Gareth has to do is tell Eddie that he would look good in something slutty and Eddie would go right for it... Right?

"Hey, Eddie!" Gareth walks into his apartment to find his best friend visibly shaking with excitement. "Gare bear! You edited for tonight?" Eddie can't contain his energy. "Yeah man of course. Um, so I was thinking that you would look great in fishnets... you should totally wear them tonight." The thought was abrupt and just tumbled out of his mouth.

Eddie is clearly confused by the random request thrown his way. "Um yeah, I guess. Maybe along with that, I should wear a fucking mesh shirt and body glitter." Apparently, Gareth sucks at sensing sarcasm because he responds with a big smile and a few nods. "Gareth I was joking! I'm not looking to get harassed today. Absolutely not." Eddie puts his hands up in a frustrated sigh and walks to his room, slamming the door closed.

"Damn it."

Eddies pov:

"How the fuck did he convince me to do this?!" Eddie scans his eyes over his body in the mirror. He is wearing mesh, fishnets, a thigh garter, and a small speedo. He looks away, from the fear of backing out due to embarrassment. His wandering eyes land on his old bloody Halloween mask from his shitty doctor costume from 5 years ago. As he picks it up he notices how bare it is. It needs chains and safety pins. So that's exactly what he does.

When he puts the mask on after the renovation he notices how fuckable he looks. The dark mesh shirt is brightened by his body shimmer and the deep black leather of his tight-fitting speedo showing the outline of his dick. The amount of skin he's showing is way too much for his liking so he throws on his leather jacket and walks over to the mirror to do his makeup.

-----------------

Eddie walks over the the Edge of Curtain to stare at the right side of the crowd. There is nobody in the audience who looks like they have intentions of trying to fuck him... at least that hes aware of, so why else would Gareth try to get him the dress like this? "Hey man! You read- damn Ed's you look hot." Eddie nods sharply to Gareth as their ear pieces start counting down from 10.

"10"

What if he gets made fun of for his outfit?

"9"

What if no matter how hard he tries people still see him as a dumb kid who couldn't graduate?

"8"

What if he gets booed off stage for dressing like this?

"7"

What if his voice cracks?

"6"

What if he fucks up the lyrics?

"5"

Gareth, Jeff, and Nathan walk onto stage.

"4"

The boys introduce themselves.

"3"

What if he can't do this?

"2"

What if his jacket ruins the outfit and fucks it all up?

"1"

Fuck it. He strips off his jacket and throws it on the nearest chair.

"0"

Eddie walks out on stage as confident as he can for someone who feels like their gonna shit themselves. The huge crowd cheers as he gets to the microphone. He moves his hair out of his face and peals off the mask revealing himself. He looks around the crowd with a smile on his face as he looks right in front of him.

As he lets his head lower to the front row he spots... Steve Harrington! He's wearing the most beautiful eyeliner, a bundle of silver necklaces, a cropped Black Sabbath shirt, and his hair of course looks better then ever. Eddie lets his mouth fall open out of shock from a sweaty star struck Steve fucking Harrington staring right at him.

They held eye contact for what seemed to be a long time but was probably only a few seconds. They both refuse to peal their eyes away from each other until Eddie feels a hand on his shoulder. It's Gareth. "Eddie. Take your eyes away from the boy and start the god damn song or i'm gonna do it myself."

Eddies eyes reluctantly drag away from the beautiful creature in front of him, and he begins to slowly move his finger across his guitar to start the first song. The concert moves slower then most. Each song feels like it's in slow motion.

On the rare occasion that Eddie is able to move his eyes over to Steve, they boy is already looking at him with the look of a shocked little teddy bear. No matter what, Eddie looks away again.

The concert slowly comes to a stop but right before he leaves he takes the mesh he's wearing on his torso and throws it into the crowd. He doesn't know where it went but at least Gareth can't convince him to wear it anymore and embarrass himself.

As everybody steps off stage he grabs Gareth's arm and drags him into the nearest room. "What the fuck were you thinking?! Why did you decide to make me dress like a fucking whore and then invite Steveeee?!" Gareth walks over to the chair in the corner of the room and sits. "Well first I invited Buckley and of course she invited Steve. I genuinely had no idea he was coming until Robin texted me an hour before the show. I just thought it would be cool if you guys could come back stage and fu-"

Before he can finish his sentence Robin bursts through the door and quickly walks over to Gareth with a shy looking Steve following behind. "Gareth. We need to talk. Right now... please." Not even giving him a chance to protest the grabs his arm and pulls him out of the room leaving just Eddie and Steve.

Steve looks incredible. His hair is as Lucious as ever and his tight pants that hug his thighs just right. Eddie notices himself staring at Steve and looks back up to find Steve also checking him out.

The awkwardness is heavy in the air. Eddie starts pushing up and down on the balls of his feet. "So..." Steve is the first one to talk. "Yeah. So." For some reason the space between their faces seems to shrink. Did they get closer or was he just imagining it?

Steve's lips part and he leans in closer and closer, leaving little to no room in between them. Steve's voice is soft and sweet as he speaks and leans into Eddies space.

"Hi."

"Hey."

Notes: I fucking hate this chapter but to be fair I wrote this at like 1am in one day so..... Punctuation also isn't my strong suit so just go with it. Tell me of you wanna be tagged

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@down-sizing-reduxedux , @gay-stranger-thingsy-stranger-things , @satan-is-obsesseded , @this-is-moony-lovegoody-lovegood , @impeachy , @maraudersfavoritewhoree , @robinbuckleymybeloved , @hyperfixationgoddess , @fandomz-brainrot , @mightbeasleepp , @ali-just-ali , @beckkthewreck , @novelnovellalla , @beeing-stuupidd , @ourautumn866 , @newtstabberr , @love-kurdtt

#steddie #steve harrington #bi steve harrington #indie artist!steve harrington #eddie munson #gay eddie munson #rockstar!eddie munson #modern steddie #bi eddie munson #stranger things fanfic #stranger things #stranger things fic #steddie fanfiction #steddie fanfic

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babubabibambam · 2 years

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Can you write NSFW headcanons for Carla Tsukinami with human s/o? ^^

Oops sorry it’s late!! Been quite busy and my hand was stung by a hornet on both sides so I wasn’t really in the shape to use em. Hopefully this one’s good!! I haven’t really gone through his routes but this is just some assumptions based on his special cds and songs!!!

Carla Tsukinami HCs(nsfw)

• This man is very into power play. He wants to have power over every single thing that happens during the intercourse.

•Meaning he’s into orgasm control and breath-play. Also into bondage, but not those silly handcuffs. The man will tie you up himself with different types of ropes depending on his mood.

•If you were a good girl and he was in the mood to reward you, he’ll pull out the softest silk one he has, be a brat then expect the rough thick ones or maybe even chains.

•Man praises and degrades at the same time. “That’s my pretty little whore.”

• “You can handle it my obedient little slut, doing so well.”

•Though he mostly degrades you, “Shut up and take it bitch.”

• “I barely touched you and you’re already this wet? Tch when did you become such a slutty bitch.”

•Master/Sir kink. Call him anything else and expect to be punished.

•This man gives hard Punishments, whipping, edging, maybe even knife-play where he has a knife at your throat while he plays with your body. Twitch once and the cold metal WILL pierce your skin.

•Breeding Breeding Breeding. Gotta continue his lineage y’know?

•Sometimes when he’s too into it and wants to breed you, he’ll accidentally turn into his wolf form, after knotting into you he realizes what he had done and baby gets all embarrassed.

•That’s the only time where he’ll have the subby vibes. Just pure blushing from embarrassment, if you want to, this is the part where you could dom him. Especially if he’s in his wolf-form, play with his ears and he’ll melt into a put right then and there. Have your fun with your subby Carla, cuz tomorrow you’ll be taught to stay in your place.

•The man’s somewhat cocky, he isn’t really the type to easily get jealous of any other person, why should he? He’s already perfect. Though he does make it known that you belong to him. In subtle ways of course. He’ll have a fashionable choker for you that says “Carla”. Which everyone would think was some cute accessory.

•He has a hate love relationship with brats, he hates it when they disobey him, but also loves to see them in tears begging and pleading to him. Loves to discipline them.

•Finds it adorable when you wear his clothes cuz you miss his smell, will fuck you right then and there in his clothes saying ‘This is a better way to leave my smell on you.’

•Is quiet during sex, occasionally releases the deepest and softest moans and grunts that makes you clench around him so hard. Leading him to release a louder moan.

•Loves loves loves dressing you up in pretty clothes just to tear it apart when he takes you.

•Isn’t really into having sex outside the bedroom, but doesn’t mean that he won’t.

•Rarely gives you orals, only does so when he wants to reward you for being a good girl for him, or when he’s edging you. He also doesn’t really like receiving them. Refuses to cum anywhere else that’s not your little cunt. “It’s a waste of my cum.” He’d say with a blank face.

•This man also says the sexiest thing without even caring. Has turned you on by accident so, many, times.

•Gets pissed off when you talk to the Sakamakis or the Mukamis. Will “cleanse” you multiple times and it WILL eventually lead to the two of you fucking.

#diabolik lovers #diabolik lovers headcanons #diabolik lovers smut #carla tsukinami #diabolik lovers carla

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sanstropfremir · 3 years

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episode 9 baby!!! dear lord that was a lot!!

frankly, i'm still in shock that i full on manifested an opera stage, AND it was a rock opera stage at that! plus i got a jazz stage AND a taemin stage??? if they’re pulling out all my favourites now then what on earth are they gonna do in the finale??? this was a very overwhelming crop of stages, i thought i was going to be prepared, but oh no i was not prepared. i'm just going to get right into it because this one is gonna be long and i have many words. i'll discuss in airing order first, and then put my personal rankings for this round at the end.

btob

costume

changsub, you absolute king. spectacular. stunning. incredible. zoot suit riot playing in my brain on repeat. will i finally get the zoot suit revival of my fucking dreams instead of this current drab ill-fitting suit trend? for those who are wondering why in the fuck changsub is dressed like that and what on earth i’m talking about, the specific cut of suit that he’s wearing is called a zoot suit, which were popular in mexican, black and italian american communities in the 30s and 40s, until they were outlawed by the united states war production board as a fabric rationing method as part of the war effort in 1942. there was a huge amount of mob violence surrrounding the wearing of them (there were actual zoot suit riots) as they were direct counter culture fashion to the predominant drab trends of white americans at the time. i'm actually very impressed they got a proper (modernized) cut of zoot suit instead of just putting him in an oversized one; there are actually specific structural differences. the pegged trouser legs, large should pads, and knee length single breasted jacket are key features, and they were often in much more flashy fabrics than a pinstripe, but they get points for effort. i wish they had put all of them in zoot suits but he’s playing the ‘lead’ actor so i will begrudgingly forgive them.

eunkwang those are the stupidest sleeve garters ive ever seen i love them never take them off. they’re like someone decided to repurpose a suspender in the worst way. excellent. i do love that they’ve got three of them in oxford saddle shoes, another great touch.

love the three piece and the fedora* on peniel. it's also in a relatively close period cut; waistcoasts (vests) were generally cut much higher in the neck pre-war, we only start seeing the neckline slide down in the 60s (i think? i don’t remember when exactly). also love to see a proper sleeve and jacket length, it's good practice to have at least a finger’s width of sleeve cuff visible ahead of the jacket sleeve when hanging at rest. also looks like there’s french cuffs on everyone, which is also great.

minhyuk in his slutty lowneck shirt....thank you. in addition to the zoot suit revival i would also like a revival of those ultra low necklines on mens’ shirts from like 2010-2011. i don’t think those are the same boots from the backdoor stage but those are some beautifully cut boots. i also loved the little details of his crewmember look, especially the chunky watch and the string bracelets; those are super realistic, i know so many crew with them and i had several for many years. and who doesn’t love a visible button fly?

none of any of the other costumes are period in any way shape or form but i’m forgiving it because there’s several layers of meta in this stage, and they explicitly based it on la la land, even though we don’t respect la la land in this house. do i wish they had gone more strictly period with at least the jazz club ‘actors’ a little more? absolutely, but i'm not mad about it.

set

again we’ve got a good delineation of the two different ‘stages,’ there’s the club itself in the smaller stage and the soundstage set in the larger space. you can pretty clearly see all the ‘pieces’ of the set on the soundstage, especially the obvious set painting techniques on false prosc frame and the window facade from that first little scene. also the you can see the castors (wheels) on all the setpieces too, which is another nice little versimilitudinous** (triple word score!) touch, as old hollywood movies were made still using theatre stagecraft techniques.

i love how the visual shorthand for ‘this is a set wink wonk’ is just...leaving a ladder on stage. i see it all the time and it's so funny. it doesn’t always make sense because as soon as there’s actors on set the ladders are the first thing cleared because actors cannot be trusted, but yes there are always ladders, so. also psa ladder safety is no joke, please be careful on ladders.

nice streamline of the mnet deco into the club. i’m consistently surprised at how well the designers have been able to mask it or use it to their advantage, because in the normal kingdom stage lighting it is SO obvious and stylistic that it always sticks out.

i'm going to ignore the fact that they implied changsub and miyeon were drinking wine out of martini glasses.

lighting

no complaints, it does its job. everything is visible and super clear. love that the ‘scene’ changes are made through the lighting, it's a really simple and effective device to change atmosphere. purple/blue/amber are the most flattering colours on human skin and that’s why you see it so commonly in stage lighting. also blue/lavendar is the best way to show nighttime/moonlight.

really nice and subtle projection work, especially with the billboard bit and the blue moon sign in the club. despite being obviously meta/’world breaking’ it’s actually very seamless and fits well into the flow of the stage.

sound

i love love love the big band feel in the intro, combined with the piano lead. very duke ellington, as all things should be.

no complaints. i love big band. i love eunkwang’s voice. i have nothing else to say.

staging

i LOVE this movie within a movie within a performance meta nonsense! it's such a fun concept and it is exactly what i wanted ikon’s first round stage to be! i also love to see btob consistently coming up with concepts that are inventive and fun and allow them to showcase their technical performance skills without the aerobics the younger groups are putting themselves through. it provides a really lovely variety and it just goes to show that you can make impressive, dramatic stages without having to be serious or ‘dark.’

i do wish they had leaned into the band director/lead singer with eunkwang a bit more; this could have been a really excellent place for a tap number a la the nicholas brothers or an homage to cab calloway. i know i know this was meant to be la la land themed but la la land is a cheap and whitewashed version of jazz and look me right in the eyes and tell me this isn’t the greatest tap routine of all time. i know i’ve typed this out somewhere before but la la land is just a conglomeration of old hollywood tropes and so stylistically cheap that this would have such a better visual core if they had actually looked back at the real old hollywood musicals like stormy weather. even singing in the rain and an american in paris have such phenomenal visuals and are really beautiful examples of the scope you can pull off with a limited technical capacity and sticking to these old techniques.

now that i'm thinking about it, oh my GOD i would DIE for a lindy hop routine in kpop PLEASE. i know it would never happen because kpop doesn’t like partner dancing and not a single kpop boy has the chops but oh you think fourth gen has too many acrobatics?

this got off track but i think you see my point.

---

ateez

costume

these are really sharply cut suits. and the detail work on the beading??? so beautiful. i'm disappointed that they gave me a rock opera stage without the true ridiculousness of rock opera costuming, because they could have pushed this a lot farther if they really wanted. a tragic lack of gay little outfits, seonghwa’s lace choker is just not enough! two favourite suits: hongjoong’s and yunho’s.

that being said i do actually really like these. this stage is actually very modern opera with a kpop twist and i'm a little surprised by that? i continue to be impressed by the ateez team who are clearly doing their research.

i'm absolutely not going back through their stages to check all the choreography but i wonder if you can track all the ‘wound’ placements to places they’ve been ‘hit.’ i wouldn’t put it past them to have put that thought in but also i’m not expecting that much either.

who is this white grim reaper bdsm executioner chain arm man. where did he come from. i have no idea and i love it.

why is honjoong blindfolded. it was such a fast beat, if youre gonna blindfold someone give it a little longer and some more obvious narrative weight!

seonghwa does that quickchange, runs across that massive stage to the smaller set, and gets into places in like 45 seconds. it's not the hardest quickchange in the world but still, under a minute is fast for any quickchange, especially when there’s travel time involved. i think the fastest, most complex quickchange i ever did was in university which was a 50s cocktail dress into a flannel and culottes with a shoe, hair, and jewelry change in 35 seconds. and that took three dressers. quickchanges are always impressive. the added bonus of this review being later is that i can specifically reference that you can see him book it the fuck off stage in the full cam!

cute moment with the backup dancers dressed in costumes from the previous stages. i'm assuming this is a time travel reference? i'll get more into my thoughts on this in the staging section. regardless, love to see that iconic seonghwa moment again.

set

this is such a restricted space! they really pared down their dancing space with those staircases and ....arms? honestly i have NO clue what these are supposed to be. the only thing i can maybe think of is flying buttresses??? but why?? i mean, i'm 90% sure theyre just there for drama and i agree but i do still have questions.

there’s a lot of moving parts in this set? the buttresses, and the upstage centre staircase. i don’t think the staircase is totally automated because i spotted some dancers securing it in place, but it’s still a moving part. i do really like that we get that expanding upwards energy, because it's really tough to get functional level movement in this kind of a performance, mostly because of its length and because it moves so quickly. so seeing the downward vertical movement and then the upward movement was actually a really nice visual contrast that made use of how tall those fucking ceilings are, and the fact that they had less horizontal space. in sort of similar way to sf9’s jealousy stage, using long, narrow vertical lines really makes it feel like a castle space. the interiors of castles, especially the really old ones, are a lot smaller than you think they would be.

i’ve actually seen that type of small house/tent/thing several times in various types of performances before, but i think this is the first time i’ve seen it used as a time travel device (other than in the say my name mv). aesthetically it's a bit incongruent but i dont really mind because i'm used to watching rock operas that look a lot weirder than this.

lighting

there is so much happening. i have NO clue what the projections are doing. i dont hate it though, so that’s a plus? there’s a clear-ish colour arc even if it does get a bit funky in the middle, which is why the projections dont feel as insanely distracting as some of the other stages we’ve seen.

the climax is a perfect example of how to light a busy stage with primarily red but still maintain clarity on the performers. a little bit of red goes a long way; the spark stage from last week would have looked so much better if they had done what the ateez designers did here.

sound

i know it's only ode to joy, but answer already gets my motor running and then i get so gassed by the guitars and then by the time those vocals come in i'm inconsolable. i don’t know why i wasn’t expecting a rock opera stage but i'm so glad i got that surprise because i genuinely love rock operas so much. it's two of the most dramatic genres in music, what more could you possibly want?

staging

the choreo for answer is so goofy that I'm kinda glad this was mostly terrible mnet boom shots. i love it, but you can't deny that it's goofy. i spotted a couple of moves from their other choreos as well?

choreographing dance fights is just as difficult as choreographing real fights and i think they did a fairly good job here. i think it was a solid mix of dance and conflict that erred on the side of dramatic rather than accurate and i prefer that over trying to be ‘realistic.’ i’ve only ever seen one truly realistic fight scene on stage and that was for a deeply naturalist play (boring and a waste of the medium), but the best fight scene i’ve ever seen was in the prague national ballet’s adaptation of kafka’s the trial where three ballet dancers beat the absolute snot out of the main character with the most beautiful leg extensions. that whole show was probably one of the best pieces of dance i’ve ever seen, holy fuck it was so good.

despite how insane the music and the visuals were going, i actually really liked how sedate this was, on the part of ateez’s performance. there was a really sophisticated and resigned energy from them that is very different from what we’ve previously seen and i think that was a pretty admirable risk to take. reaching the top and then throwing away the crown? especially in a competition where every other stage has involved stealing crowns or royalty and there’s a group competing that got here through that very concept? that shows a real maturity, peace of mind, and foresight that i did not at all expect from a bunch of 22 year olds.

here we come to a very interesting comparison. both ateez and tbz are very heavily leaning on previously established group lore. we all know my thoughts on why it isn’t working for tbz, but here’s why i think it is working for ateez: it's because it doesn’t matter to the audience’s understanding of the stage. i had absolutely no fucking clue what was going on the first time i watched this, but that didn’t stop me from enjoying the music and all the weird shit they were doing. i totally believed that they understood what was going on. there’s a loose enough established conflict right at the beginning that draws us in, and really it doesn’t matter who they're fighting because they win in the end. the key here is that they’re so earnest. they believe 100% in every move they make on that stage. there’s no winks to camera, there’s not a drop of irony. they really deeply care about the ridiculousness of it all and that’s what makes it work. i sure as fuck dont know what’s going on, but i can see that they do, and i trust that. this is what i meant when i talked about convincing the audience you belong on stage in my stage presence post. i’ve never once believed that juyeon was anything other than an idol. he’s talented and very beautiful and he may occasionally stand on that stage like he owns it but it's always as juyeon. as an idol. but when hongjoong flaps around in that gigantic fur coat i 100% believe he’s a pirate captain. I believe he’s a punk rebel leader. i believe him a resigned king. there’s always a level of irony you have to fight as a performer because we all start from a place of disbelief. acting is not just lying to the audience, it's lying to yourself too. and if you succeed in convincing yourself? well, you’re already halfway to convincing us.

i checked it out because i wanted to see if they did the blindfold how i expected them to and was genuinely surprised by hongjoong’s fancam. the boy is EMOTING even when he knew the camera wasn’t on him; that’s a real dedication to craft.

ok i'm finished talking about this stage, this is over two pages in my document, there’s so many things i have not covered here but that’s fine, i'm quite sure any further thoughts will end up out there at some point.

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sf9

costume

let’s get it out of the way......crop top. crop top? crop top. crop top.

ok, besides the crop top, i think i might actually like the backup dancer outfits more...? i find mannequin adjacent looks really fascinating and i thought there was a lot more they could have done here in connecting the two thematically. i actually think a change of costume on the boys would have been very interesting, especially because there was a lot of inference and direct reference to changes of colour.

ALL the backup dancers are wearing the same wig and i LOVE that.

special mention zuho’s.....jacket? the right idea but it absolutely should have been one of those extreme french cut bodysuits, you COWARDS. don’t come at me with this ‘male version of venus’ if you don’t have your whole torso out! come on!

set

not sure if this is meant to be a department store, a factory, or a white cube gallery. honestly you could make the case that they’re all the same place anyways. more on this later.

i loved the movator and wish they had used it more! that sequence was so good and they could have done some more interesting repetition sequences to further highlight the ‘sameness’/the breaking of that sameness.

i feel like the set could have been used more as a whole? i would have loved to see some mannequin interactions with those boxes, because all they did was dump colour everywhere.

....why did they feel the need to include the rain bit? i know it's likely because it's in the mv and at the 2018 dream concert taemin does perform move in the rain, but with the standing still and the box walls with the words it just looks like a department store ad. which i...dont think is what they were intending?

lighting

nothing really to say here. it has a similar feel to the mayfly rap stage, which is fine because the lighting for that was good. i could tell what was going on all the time and that’s the most important part. notable standouts are the lips sequence, that's fun use of pop iconography and very effective, and the scanning lasers at the beginning.

the repeating sequence in the edm dance break is actually done pretty simply, it's just what happens when you point a camera that’s livestreaming to a monitor directly at that monitor. it's a very cool effect and it was neat to see it used intentionally, especially with the handheld leds.

actually i also really liked the lightbox tables, those were cool.

sound

the remix was fine for the most part, it was about what i expected it to sound like. i did however greatly dislike that unnecessary edm break in the middle. what was the point of that? it didn’t add anything to the overall sound or arc of the stage because it was SO out of place. there was no connective tissue around it.

oh i was also not a fan of the effect on zuho’s mic. no one else had a discernible vocal effect so it felt a little out of place. also for some reason his cadence and tone right at the end made me think of some of the voices that bo burnam uses for his vocal masque sketches/songs, especially repeat stuff, weirdly? took me right the fuck out of it. i listened to it again after i slept and i’m still getting it, so maybe i’m just going insane so best ignore this part.

staging

loved the mannequin tree, not a clue why it was there.

do actually think this is a successful cover because it does what i was hoping it would, which is take move completely out of the taemin context and put it into an entirely new one. however, i’m really struggling to figure out what exactly that new context is? and what theyre trying to say with it?

obviously they went for a ‘show your own colours/individuality’ vibe, like i said in the set section, where exactly is this supposed to be? from the start i get factory/mechanized environment, which is fine and grand because mannequins and making repetitive motions and products and all that, makes sense. but then there’s stacked shelving type units happening and curtains and that combined with the mannequins give me pretty big department store vibes, which is also fine, because that’s still a comment on commercialization and the mass production of product. but then we get to the movator and the repetitive movements of the dancers say pretty clearly factory, but the lighting and projections are very pop art referential, plus combining that with the white set, just makes me think of an art gallery. so now is this a comment on the commercialization and commidification of contemporary art? are they making a statement about being ‘real’ artists among the others who have lost the critical understanding of why pop art was even a thing in the first place? and then the rain bit at the end literally looks like a department store ad, so are they then making another statement that they still are that packaged product? maybe the episode has more clarity in it but i’m genuinely a bit baffled by what the underlying statement is here.

i suspect it is not as deep as i'm making it, but i did say that i was likely to be hyper critical of this stage AND i am a grad student, so here we are.

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tbz

costume

ok of all the ‘fourth gen’ style costumes we’ve seen, i actually like these ones more than most. i'm not entirely clear on the theme but i'm assuming it's meant to be post apocalyptic, and i'll take that.

backup dancers in black!!! we’re beyond this!!!

this will be a running theme with this stage, but i’m disappointed these don’t have more depth.

set

compared to every other stage, the set here seems especially plain. there’s so little set dec that it's disappointing. i do like the movement of the pieces themselves combined with the blocking; that first slide underneath the arches was slick and i would have liked to have seen more of that.

yea ok the big snake was cool and also a fairly complex build, but the transitions around it were a bit awkward for my tastes. especially the turn around, why did they even show that at all? you have control over what the audience sees, you can totally not show scenic transitions. skz were super smart about hiding theirs in last week’s episode.

also if you have a bigass puppet like that, i wanna see some more movement from it! it doesn’t have to be complex, we literally just saw a kraken balloon arm wave around aimlessly, but at least there was movement! that snake had a long ass body, why didn’t they at least take a pseudo dragon dance movement with it, that would have been such fun to watch with the iridescent scales. there was a lot of opportunity here!

lighting

i don’t hate it but also.... not a lot to say about it on the whole.

there were two really smart ideas here, the first being the front projection section, which i was SO glad to see! i explained in a previous review, but the projections in kingdom are not actually projections per se, because they’re actually massive led screens. there are two common types of projections in performance, rear projection and front projection. rear projection is when the projector is behind the screen, and front projection is ‘normal’ projection. rear projection can produce a crisper image because you have full control of the light values, because the projector is in a separate room from the performance space. but the downsides are that the projector has to be in a separate room from the performance space. so if you’re short on real estate, it's not ideal. front projection is much more common, because the tech is a lot cheaper and easier to access, especially now, and it requires less real estate because you can ceiling mount about the audience (you can move a projector wherever, this is just the most common spot in commercial theatres). but! in order to get an actually crisp image, you have to be really careful with your light bounce. it’s exactly the same principle as how you kinda can't see a projected screen when you have all the lights turned on, but when you turn them off it's a lot clearer. front projection works best in pitch dark, so when you use it in a theatre you gotta be smart about it. i use front projection a lot in my personal art practice as a singular light source, and that’s what tbz did here in that traveling/snake intro sequence. it’s a really fun technique that they used as a good gimmick because it’s not something we’ve seen before, and you get some great shadow effects because the projector is throwing light directionally at the performers (they have it set up close to the floor, it’s probably on a wheeled cart of some kind). however i did not like the snake intro. a bit too cheesy and out of place, especially because the asset quality didn’t match the rest of landscapes that we have been seeing.

the second smart idea, which is partially also a set and blocking thing but whatever, was that final image of the eclipse within the circle architecture with all the members standing in front of it. it was a great shot and a great ending pose, but it felt like a concept photo. like someone had that image as the idea that they then built the stage around, instead of a narrative first and then imagery after.

sound

this remix had SO much promise! those first two minutes were SO GOOD. i love that dirty discordant strings bit, it's gross and right up my alley. but it really fell off in the back half and i'm sad about that.

staging

i'm sorry tbz but.....what did you actually do differently than exo here? with the exception of the continual game of thrones references? nothing here felt transcendentally different from the original monster. and especially coming RIGHT after sf9’s move, which did go beyond its original context. this feels more like an awards show stage cover than a stage at the level of the others we’ve seen just this episode.

again like with the skz stage, there’s no conflict here. no tension. yes they do a great job covering the dance but it just isn’t enough! this is obviously personal preference and i'm sure lots of people liked the fact that it was uncomplicated, but even just a hint of narrative tension could have pushed this into more engaging territory. and if they didn’t want to do that, i would have loved to see them make up for that with extra visual spectacle. this is the no limits round! ikon is putting a full jungle on stage and these are grey cubes!

i think this is a perfect example of what i talked about at the end of my tbz section in my episode four review; this is a good performance, there are good elements at play and good ideas at their genesis, but the core of the issue is that nothing about this is transformative. all of the ideas here are just exaggerations of the original song. fuck, the snake was even IN the mv! and they didn’t even include the best part which is the lip chains! ive said before and i'll say it again; being a good artist has two steps, the first is understanding the material and its context, and the second is elevating the material from that context and synthesizing something new. tbz are really good at the first step, but terrible at the second.

---

ranking

btob - the cleanest and the most fun of the round. everything i wanted.

sf9 - fun and a good cover, despite being conceptually baffling.

ateez - very extra dramatic nonsense with an unexpected dose of sincerity. and it’s rock opera, of course i love it.

skz - fun, with some good thematic devices but generally lacking in arc. also australian accents, that’s an automatic ding.

tbz - honestly the first two minutes of the remix and the costume are holding this above 6th. it just wasn’t fully formed.

ikon - aesthetically this is a great set design and although i do love the opening and closing moments, everything else scrapes me the wrong way. super personal preference here, i’m not expecting anyone else to agree with me.

i feel like my rankings were probably pretty easy to guess if you’ve been around reading the reviews for long enough. i do have very specific tastes after all. i know sf9 ranked first in the episode but i have no idea what the other slots are. i’ll find out when i watch the episode in a couple of days, but i think yea a first for sf9 is fair. i do think its mostly because it’s a taemin song and you have to do something horrendous in order to fuck up a taemin song, but there is a lot of thought and work that went into that stage.

ok i'm done now, sorry this was later than usual, but i was busier and there were four stages that i had to review. also technical difficulties because tumblr is a garbage platform and nothing works properly. comments/questions/opinions always welcome, i know i didn't expand on a couple of points that i could have so hopefully y'all have some thoughts too!

* the type of hat that ~society~ has told you is a fedora is actually a trilby. what peniel is wearing is a real fedora, i felt the need to correct this unjust hat malignment.

** meaning ‘the appearance of being true or real.’ you do sometimes hear it used by normal people, but it’s more commonly used as a descriptor in film and theatre. it’s also one of the five rules of neoclassical theatre, which are: versimilitude, purity of form, five act structure, decorum, and purpose. the most prominent playwrights from that era are moliere and racine if youre interested in what those look like in an actual text.

#kingdom #kingdom review #btob #ateez #stray kids #the boyz #sf9 #tumblr is so broken it would NOT let me save this as a draft #does my constant hyperlinking make you angry tumblr? too bad im gonna keep doing it #i played in a jazz band in school for seven years #which is another indicator as to why i am like this #one of the first songs i remember learning was zoot suit riot #i have very strong memories of yelling RIOT during performances #i will however forever question the logic of our band teacher making us learn a song written by 'the cherry poppin daddies'#christ on a bicycle this is TEN pages #and it took a full eight hours last night and then i did like two hours of editing after i woke up #maybe i should go back to bed #ah i forgot to tag ikon again lmao #ikon #kpop analysis #text #if there are any spelling errrors do not tell me im tired of reading this #im pretty sure this is my longest review so far i decided to hate myself and did a wordcount #its 5.2K you're welcome you better get a snack for this one #i hope this is an interesting read for people ive lost all objectivity at this point #pls enjoy my semi-comprehensible word vomit!

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simplyxdolxstyles · 3 years

Text

Halloween Frenzy

This piece is a bit old but just wanted to post it. It’s also 1st person this time so that a bit different. Let me know what you think, feedback is always appreciated.

Warning: badly written smut, d-bag gray, and an overall shitty halloween party but what can you do?

Enjoy. (also the title is horrible but I just didn’t know what else to call it.

I was at a Halloween party with my friend (Y/F/N), a Halloween party that surely made bingo night seem fun. She was a cat and I was Minnie Mouse.

Her costume was slutty, though mine had a bit more decency. I opted on doing my hair but decided against it and just wore a red bob wig instead, while (Y/F/N) wore some extensions to her already long auburn hair.

“I heard Grayson is around here somewhere.” (Y/F/N) told me. Grayson Dolan was a dirty, rotten, player. Hot, but a playing jerk. Sure, he may seem so innocent that the teachers and adults seem to fall for, me? It didn’t get very far. To me he was nothing but a good looking bad boy looking for trouble.

“Great…” I trailed of rolling my eyes. Unfortunately, I was like any girl here who had a crush on the schools rebel, I just didn’t show it, or give into his satisfaction like all these brainless zombies seemed to be doing. Hating to admit like the other girls, I was drooling as I watched him play soccer. He wasn’t exactly the tallest person on the team, but having him sweat and take off his shirt at the end made up for so much.

Just as she had said that, I heard someone’s loud, obnoxious laugh. I looked to my right to see a boy wearing a white tank top, and baggy jeans with chains. With his back turned towards me, I gave him the nastiest glare I could muster. I had found Grayson.

“Easy there, girl. He won’t like you if you’re glaring,” she teased, nudging me slightly.

“Ugh! Shut up…” I hissed. As if he could feel my stare, he slowly turned around till he too was looking straight at me. After studying me a few minutes he slowly smirked. Red cup in his hand and feeling so cocky, he walked over to me, (Y/F/N) running out of sight. ‘Gee, thanks (Y/F/N)!’

“Well, well. If it isn’t Minnie Mouse. What’s a matter? Couldn’t find a Mickey?” he chuckled at his own joke (boo, sorry for that lame joke xD)

“Last time I checked, this was a Halloween party, not a douchebag contest.” I said grimly.

“And last time I checked, this wasn’t a WHORE house” he retorted. I rolled my eyes and scoffed at him. It wasn’t like the other girls here weren’t dressed the same anyway. In fact, probably more revealing than I was.

“What are you supposed to be anyway?” I asked, even though I didn’t want to.

“I’m not in costume, but people think I’m a gangster. Either way I don’t care, this is a lame party anyway.” He shrugged, shoving his hands in pants pockets.

“I see, well you could’ve fooled me,” I muttered mostly to myself. He was hot, but this outfit just made him look like an asshole, well more than he already was.

“Alright ladies and gentlemen. Time for a special performance by the ‘Cupcakes.’” Mark announced.

“Now if you don’t mind, I have to dance now,” I sassed. (Just think of any song lmao)

We head out to the make-shift stage out in the backyard. Walking up the stage we got into position. I caught eyes with Grayson briefly, throwing him a sly smirk. Let’s see you now hot shot.

Showing our stuff this way and that, we were getting a rise out of the audience. With all the eyes that were on us, I could feel Grayson giving the most intense stare of all. Studying me, watching my every move.

With the final moves of our dance, the crowd started going crazy with cheers and hollers. I saw Grayson give a cocky grin, though he was clapping. Seeming genuinely impressed with our special presentation. Something to at least give life to this dull party.

As everyone was back inside once again, drinking, making out, and doing god knows what. I went to grab a drink to calm my nerves.

“Hey, you did well out there,” came from behind me. Turning quickly around, I only found (Y/F/N), secretly I wished it was Grayson.

“T-thanks, so did you.” I took a sip of the cheap, stale beer. Certainly not the best, but better than anything.

“Don’t worry, (Y/N), I’m sure by now he thinks you’re hot, he won’t be able to resist you.” I just gave a closed mouth smile. With a comforting pat on the shoulder, she stalked off to go get drunk or something. I snorted at what she said. It wasn’t likely to happen but. She did put an image in my head.

Not long after, everything started to get fuzzy. I hadn’t seen Grayson since we did the routine. ‘He’s probably bangin’ some chick right now’ I thought to myself. At the thought, I felt myself moisten. Thoughts swam through my mind wondering how he was in bed. Exactly how many of the student body had he slept with? As I exited the bathroom, I froze when I saw who was just on the other side of the door.

“Finally, I found you,” he smirked. He had taken off the biker hat, his messy, charcoal black hair in show. “Yeah right.” I muttered to myself. He walked closer to me as if he heard me.

“I’m serious.” He whispered lowly in my ear. God! I just wanted to dig my hands in his hair and make an even more mess of it. I gulped hard. Pushing a way slightly, I tried to play it as he did. But I was crumbling, like a pie.

“Why, couldn’t find a lay?” this time I smirked. He narrowed his eyes at me menacingly.

“Come with me,” He demanded me. He grabbed my arm and roughly dragged me somewhere. It all happened so fast. He pulled me until we were in a room. Probably Mark’s guest room, and slammed the door shut behind him. Pinning me against the door, he held my writs above my head. Oh my God? Was this happening?!

Nose almost touching mine, I stared into his cold, dark eyes that held anger, frustration, and lust?

“You know what you’re doing, don’t you?” he seethed in my face. I was genuinely confused. What was he talking about? His eyes that were usually a warm brown colour was only a thin ring as his dilated pupil was full blown.

“What are you talking about?” I stared at him, a confused look graced my features.

“Don’t play dumb with me! You act like a slut tonight, the dance for example. I know you like me! I’m not fucking stupid. You wanted to get a rise at me, we’ll you will fucking get it now!” he exclaimed with such a dark aura. He pushed me into the door, it was actually starting to hurt.

“Flaunting yourself around in that costume, dancing in front of all those people. You wanna be a slut fine, then I’ll treat you like one!” he pulled me off the door and pushed me on the bed, wig falling as he did so. Oh my god! This was happening!

He crawled on top of me, wrists held by his hands again. He was acting like a maniac, but looked beyond gorgeous as the moon shone light on his face.

“Go ahead, Make your move,” my blood was boiling. I was angry yet so turned on. He just knew how to work his magic.

“Watching me at those soccer games. You think I don’t notice you stare at me? Huh? I know you like me, just like all those other girls. You are the worst one of all, pretending to act all innocent. You are a slut, don’t you ever forget it!” he roared, pressing me further into the mattress. I whimpered in pain from the tight grip. God, it was so hot in here.

“Don’t worry, babe. You’ll soon be screaming my name. In pleasure.” he whispered lowly in my ear. How could a guy with a cute face have a sexy, yet aggressive side to him? I was enjoying every moment of this. He gripped me by the neck, carefully not to cut me out of breath and forced me to look at him. My now free hands landed in his hair, pulling at the roots. I lowered his head till I could feel his breath against my lips.

“Oh yes, I’m a big slut,” I cooed teasingly. He ran his thumb along my lower lip before he placed his lips upon mine. Kissing me twice before he licked into my mouth. I opened my mouth for him as he entered. He kissed me with raw desire, biting at my lips and tugging them, running his tongue against my teeth. I swear I could taste a little blood. After our little make-out session and leaving nothing untouched, he pulled me up and went for the zipper of my Minnie Mouse costume.

He licked a strip up my neck, teasing before he went to a spot on my neck that drove me completely mad. I was at his beck and call, and I enjoyed every second of it.

“Ahhh!” I gasped. I could feel him smirk against my skin. I knew he burst my capillaries, thus know sporting a hickey. He licked over his creation a couple of times before he pulled down the shoulder part of my dress. Grayson kissed my shoulder a couple of times before moving down towards my collarbones, again leaving marks.

I gently pushed him off me before I climbed onto his lap. I kissed from his jaw down to his neck, the same way he did to me.

“You know, you looked so hot tonight. I couldn’t control myself. I would have gone mad.” He whispered lowly. He let out a delicious groan that only infused my hunger. Seeing guys in pleasure was surely a sight to see. Letting go of his flesh I tugged on the hem of his tank top, signaling I wanted the offending material off. He chuckled as he pulled it over his head and somewhere in the room.

“Ha, couldn’t wait could you?”’ he teased. It was only fair if I took of my costume, throwing it somewhere in the room along with his tank top. Thank god I picked the good set of undergarments tonight. “Shut up.” I playfully nudged him.

He now laid on his back as I placed kisses down his chest all the way to his abdomen. His breath increasing, the heat was too much. He gripped the sheets as I got to the hem of his pants. Placing butterfly kisses here and there. Seeing him at his mercy was a pretty hot sight to see.

“(Y/N), please do something. Don’t tease me.” He whimpered, gripping the sheets again.

“Aww, where’s the fun in that, huh?” I cooed. I teased, but I couldn’t wait either. The anticipation was killing me. Popping open the button of the pants, slowly moving along to the zipper and pulling it down at a painfully slow pace. I tugged down at his pants till it was at his knees, with his help of course. He was wearing black boxer shorts, but I could still see his outline.

The little trails of hair he had that led to the ‘promise land’ were fine, like baby hair just starting to grow. I took the band of the boxers and slowly began pulling down. His member slapped out hitting his belly button and a little past. He wasn’t huge, but he sure was thick. Twitching at my touch, he bucked in my hand. I wrapped my hand in a small fist and began to pump.

“Gahhh! Shit… Oh my God…” he released a loud moan. Eyes shut tight, eyebrows furrowed, biting his lip and writhing in pleasure. Pre-cum started to ooze out of his slit, I took my thumb and rubbed it all over the head of his member, jerking at the sensitive touch. I was about to take him in my mouth when he stopped me.

“Wait! Come here and turn around, you’re back to me,” he instructed. I pouted but did as he told. I took off my bra as I felt him tugging my thong down. Lifting myself to aid him in the process, it was finally off. God he looked so sexy. His cheeks flushed, his messy hair. I would have loved to take a picture of this moment, but that would have been weird. He pulled me by the hips till I was backed up to him, until we were both in line.

“Whenever you’re ready, baby.” I lowered my face, lightly licking from base to tip, the same time he licked up my wet opening. Twirling my tongue around the head of his member urged a groan to escape once again.

“Oh Lord! Don’t stop…” he practically begged. I didn’t. We both worked at the same pace, if I was slow then he was slow, if I sped up then so did he, we met the perfect rhythm. Not too fast not to slow. That was how Grayson worked, regardless anything.

“Ohhh!” I moaned around his twitching length that was in my mouth. He had hit a spot deep inside me as he fucked me with his tongue. Spots were soon seen in my line of vision. We were both close.

“On three, baby. One…Two…Three!” we moaned each other’s name as we wen spiraling into climax. Pleasure filled my veins as we gasped for air. I pulled off his dick and turned around to face him. He smiled a bright smile at me which I mirrored. ‘God, he was so cute!’ I thought. He pulled me up over to him and kissed me thoroughly, taking my breath away. His lips were so soft, it was like kissing a cloud.

“Don’t think we’re done just yet, I still need to fuck you, you’re still a little slut who hasn’t learned,” He gave a hard slap to my ass that made me yelp in surprise.

“On all fours! Ass up…NOW!” he barked, in his smooth, velvety voice. I got into position like he told me to, I could feel myself getting wet with want.

“Now, are you gonna be a good girl and listen? Or do I have to teach you to behave, Hmm?” I was all over the place at this point. He gave me another slap, this time I was more used to it.

“I’ll be good I promise. Just fuck me!” I exclaimed impatiently. He rubbed the head of his member against my slick opening, I couldn’t help but grind against him.

“Bad! Don’t move, or I will slap you even harder,” he growled, from somewhere deep within his chest. I wanted to object but I obeyed. It was probably better that way. He placed it back against my heat, but I didn’t grind this time.

“Beg! I want you to beg. Beg me to fuck you, c’mon. I’m waiting…” Man, he sure knew how to push someone over the edge.

“Please, Grayson, fuck me. Fuck me like the slut I am, I need to learn to behave!” I wailed in agony.

“No! Not Grayson, you will refer to me as ‘Master’ now. So tell me.” He smacked me once again.

“Master! Please, I need you to fuck me. I need to behave, just do something!” I cried out. I probably looked so pathetic right now compared to other’s girls. But wouldn’t you do the same if you really wanted someone. With that, he thrusted himself inside me.

“AHHHHHH!!!” I screamed. He was buried in there good. He gripped my hips steadily, moving in and out feeling everything inside.

“Faster GR-MASTER! OHHHH!” He obliged and started going faster. Each thrust sent me closer to release, sweet relief. He roughly pulled my matted hair in a ponytail, adding more to this sweet pain/pleasure.

“How’s it feel? Do you feel good, baby?” he asked, smacking me once again. There was going to be an imprint of his hand if he kept that up.

“Yes, so good, master. I’m getting close,” I wailed loudly, the sounds of the party was loud enough to mask my moans so I could be as loud as I wanted. He jackhammered into me, touching all the right spots. I would’ve cum in no time, but sadly, he stopped.

“Ride me!” he spat. He sat up straight as I climbed into his lap once again. Holding himself as I sank down on him. ‘Wow, what a feeling!’

He filled me all the way up, just how I wanted him to. I held on his shoulders as I rocked back and forth. Then he guided my hips in movement as I slowly began to bounce.

“You look so hot right now, god you feel so good. Kiss me, baby!” He said weakly, his dark hair plastered to his forehead. I pulled him by the face and brought his lips on mine. He licked inside, exploring my cavern once again like how I explored his. The sounds of wet kissing and slapping filled room, along with our moans and grunts, we were ready. Grayson savagely attacked my neck and collarbones with kisses and hickies, hickies I would surely have to cover up.

“Ohhh, I’m almost there!!” I mewled as he continued to attack my collarbones. He hadn’t moved but moved his hand in-between us and rubbed my clit in circles.

“Mmm…” he moaned in my neck, biting it slightly. I could feel heat pooling in my lower abdomen. I started bouncing harder, getting him to hit the spot inside.

“I’m going to-ohhhh! GRAY-MMPHH” He kissed me hard, fueling the fire further.

“Scream my name, babe. Scream it!” he rasped. Hot flashed was going through my body, body feeling fuzzy and tingly.

“GRAYSON!!! AHHHH!!” I screamed loudly. I felt him follow not to long after. Feeling him shoot thick ropes of his seed inside as he lowly grunted. Exhausted, we feel back into the bed, feeling the post-sex bliss.

“Holy Shit!” I heaved. He chuckled, pulling me into his chest, muttering a quiet “I know.” I snuggled into him, inhaling his scent. Sweat, a tinge of soap, and himself. It made me smile. He pecked my temple softly as I drew patterns on his body.

“What are doing?” he asked, giggles as I traced.

“Nothing,” I answered cutely. I let go and looked up at him. He pecked the tip of my nose softly before he did the same.

“That was amazing.” I uttered, mostly to myself. It really was, it felt like we had done this before. “It was.” He agreed. It couldn’t have been more perfect.

“We should probably get going though, people might wonder where we ran off to…” although I could see he didn’t want to.

“Alright,” I just had one question, where did this leave us. Was this some hookup or did he actually want something. I had to know.

“Hey, Grayson? I just wanted to ask where this leaves us, you know…” I trailed off at the end. I saw him freeze a little as he went to get his shirt.

“(Y/N), you know I have a reputation to withhold. I can’t just drop it now. Especially because of a party. My head dropped and I nodded glumly. I knew it was too good to be true.

“Listen, tonight was amazing. Sweetheart, please understand that. But I will tell you this, I have never ever felt like this in all my time since we started high school. I wanted you for the longest time, but you are some much better than a guy like me, a lot better. I’m a no good loser who just passes by along every day, you don’t need me to hold you back.” He cupped my cheeks, I willed myself not to cry, though I felt a tear slide down my cheek,

“Don’t cry please, that last thing I want to do is make you cry. Shit.” He muttered the last to himself.

“I-I really l-like you,” I said. He quickly looked up at me as if he hadn’t heard what I said. He heard loud and clear.

“Baby, don’t do this. I can’t just say I’m taken. It’s so obvious.” He tried to reason. I knew he was right.

“I’ll wait for you,” I stared deeply into his as how he stared into mine. He gave a small smile.

“Perhaps, one day. But right now, it’ll be way too complicated.”

“I g-guess.” I sighed looking down. He nudged my chin up to make me look at him.

“Hey, it’s not the end. You know, if you’re always looking, you know where to find me.

“You have something those girls/guys never had. A heart. You see people differently, you see the good in them. I could try and not be too much of an asshole, but that’s about it,” He made a face. I chuckled at that, maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. I was determined to wait no matter how long it would be.

“Hey…” He began. He cupped my face softly in his hands and kissed me long and passionate, relishing the feelings into this one kiss. He pulled back and smiled a toothy smile, I mirrored it.

“You know, the assembly is next Tuesday, wanna skip and you know, fool around a little?” he threw a cheesy wink a little. I had to laugh at his childishness sometimes.

“You’ve got yourself a date,” I replied, he pecked me one last time and waited for me as I got my costume back on.

As we walked out, I saw (Y/F/N) and caught her eye. She looked between Grayson and I, her eyes grew the size of saucers.

“Tell me!” she mouthed. I laughed a little.

“Later” I mouthed back.

From then on, Grayson and I had a different relationship, sure he still did stuff here and there, but besides that. We had something that no one could or would understand. A Connection. Everyone was too quick to judge just because he was a player, but I knew he was more than that. He was willing to work it with someone. On the day he is finally ready to take that step, I would gladly welcome him with open arms.

#grayson dolan #grayson dolan blurb #grayson smut #dolan twins #smut with a bit of angst and fluff #grayson dolan imagines #grayson x you #grayson x reader

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blackrose343 · 3 years

Text

DMC Secret Santa 2020

Warnings: None

Devil May Cry - Vergil x Lady

Fanfic summary: Lady and Vergil completed their mission early giving Lady some time to do some last minute shopping. Once done, they are welcomed back with a holiday party.

3,497 words

Hi @unlucky-leek! I’m your secret santa for the @dmcsecretsanta event! Happy holidays!

Lady was sitting on the ledge of a building, reloading her hand guns. Afterwards, she examined Kalina Ann II. Her brows knitted together when she saw the deep claw marks. She hoped Kailina Ann wasn’t too damaged. Lady never intended to use Kalina Ann II as a shield but she had to. If she didn’t, she would have been chopped into pieces. Kalina Ann II didn’t appear to have too much damage. She tried to examine the inner parts but knew Nico would do a better job. Lady determined Kalina Ann II was alright for now, then placed it on her back. Once Kalina Ann II was secured she started to search for Vergil.

Lady followed the demonic cries. She shot a couple demons down along the way. Shooting them was a mundane task compared to earlier. Barely any thinking was involved, giving Lady the time to go through her thoughts. She noticed Dante was assigning her more missions with Vergil recently. Lady was nonchalant about it. She doesn’t mind working with Vergil. In fact, she was happy to work with him; to be with him. Although, Vergil seemed to detest working with her more than usual. She had no idea why. She didn’t think she was that bad of a partner.

Lady found Vergil finishing off the last demon. A clean slice through the demon’s neck was all it took. The head rolled onto the ground. Vergil tapped the body so it would fall backwards. He swung Yamato through the air, removing the demon’s blood from Yamato. He sheathed Yamato, then turned to Lady. He was greeted by her cute little smirk. Lady’s hand was on her hip and she was playfully tapping her foot. Knowing Lady finished her portion of the mission before him irked Vergil.

“Is that all of them?” Lady saw that Vergil's scowl was deeper than usual. This meant something was bothering him. To get his mind off of it, she decided to tease him.

“Of course. Why else would I be here waiting for you?” She blew Vergil a kiss as she swiftly walked past him. Vergil silently hoped Lady didn’t see any indication of a blush. His eyes briefly lingered on her swaying form. He tried his best to ignore Lady. He was in no mood to jest with her or deal with his feelings for her. To keep himself from doing either he listened to Lady. She was more than eager to deem their mission “complete”. She craved a night of fun and relaxation. Vergil on the other hand could care less. He would prefer to get back home and continue the book he was reading. Well, part of him would.

Another part of Vergil wished he could hold Lady in his arms. He could never get himself to show his emotions let alone tell anyone his desires. Ever since he got back from the Underworld, he tried to get along with everyone. It was no easy task, especially after everything he’s done. He started to feel lonely when he realized no one wanted to be around him. He remembers a few missions went by before Lady started treating him decently. Soon after, the others started to warm up to him. As time passed, Vergil started to develop feelings for Lady. Vergil never expected Lady to return the feelings he had for her. He sighed then caught up with Lady.

Lady was on the phone, talking to Nico. She was letting Nico know where to pick them up. Nico explained the van was experiencing issues. She may not get to them for a few hours. Lady found this to be a pleasant surprise. She wanted to take the opportunity to wander around town and go shopping. She had some last minute shopping to take care of. Lady told Vergil he could go home. Vergil decided to stay with her to make sure all the demons were eliminated. And to spend more time with her.

Lady admired the decorated city. It was filled with colorful lights, drapes, ornaments, and many more decorations. Lady noticed she was not the only one who had some shopping to do. There were lines of people everywhere. Some of the lines were long enough to go around buildings. Everyone was racing everywhere with bags and boxes. Cars were back to back searching for a parking spot. Vergil questioned Lady’s decision about shopping. He suggested she order everything online. Lady dismissed Vergil’s concern then went to the first clothing store in sight.

Vergil slumped in a chair, attempting to read a magazine that was lying around. He was waiting for Lady to come out of the dressing room for what felt like the millionth time. He couldn’t figure out how many clothing stores he went to within the last couple hours. At each one Lady tried on an infinite amount of outfits. Each time Vergil would give Lady a simple compliment or give a subtle show of approval. They were not the reactions Lady was looking for so she would go back to the dressing room and change. When she was done trying on outfits, they would move on to another store. It was an endless cycle Vergil no longer wanted to be a part of.

A few men tried to give Vergil advice on how to make the cycle end. One man said to be dramatic and really show how much he liked the outfits Lady picked. Another man told Vergil to tell Lady what he liked about the outfit. Vergil made a “tsk” sound, then sulked in the chair. He was hoping Lady would find an outfit soon then decide to go home.

Lady stood in the dressing room. She looked at the clothes she chose to try on. She wasn’t sure what to try on next. The outfits she tried on so far varied from professional to slutty. The whole time she has been trying to find something that would “wow” Vergil. Lady knew this would be a hard task to accomplish but come on. There had to be something that would get a genuine reaction out of him.

Lady went through everything she picked until her eyes caught sight of a dress she picked out. On a hanger was a backless cocktail dress with a sterling silver chain. The dress was midnight blue with a bit of shimmer to it. There was a slit down on the right side starting at the upper leg. Lady almost chose to not try it on. When Lady shops for clothes, she looks for outfits she can fight in. She was unsure if she could fight in it without it getting ripped to pieces. If she had to be honest, she chose the dress because it was cute. Eh, what the hell?

“What do you think?” The men trying to converse with Vergil gasped, awed by the sight before them. Vergil lifted his head curious enough to see what was in front of him. Lady walked out of the dressing room straight to the multiple mirrors on the pedestal. She was looking at herself in the mirrors from all angles. She nearly missed seeing Vergil’s reaction: widened eyes, mouth slightly agape. Lady was more than certain she saw a small blush on Vergil. She turned to Vergil smirking. Pretending to be coy, Lady put a finger on her lip, then spoke. “So I take it you like it.”

Vergil tried to compliment Lady but he got tongue tied. Lady couldn’t help herself from laughing at Vergil’s reaction. Vergil’s small blush grew from embarrassment. Vergil wanted to turn his blushing face away from Lady. Thankfully, Lady was merciful and went to change. The men congratulated Vergil on ending the cycle for the night, then started to talk about Lady. Vergil was not pleased with everything he heard. He gave all the men the coldest death-glare he could ever muster. Immediately, all the men left, terrified to find out what would happen if they didn’t.

Lady was hiding her excitement over Vergil’s reaction to the dress. To her, it was more of an accomplishment than completing the mission early. Lady bought the dress even though she knew she wouldn’t wear it often. She gave Vergil the packaged dress then made her way out the door. Vergil chuckled to himself then pursued Lady.

They were walking around town with no destination in mind. Vergil was thankful Lady managed to finish her last minute shopping. Lady started a conversation about their holiday plans. She was going to hangout with Trish (and more than likely do more shopping). For the first time, in a long time, Vergil was going to spend the holidays with his family. Lady couldn’t help but laugh at Vergil. His expression when he told her his holiday plans got to her. She could tell Vergil wasn’t too ecstatic to spend the holidays with Dante. To be honest, she wouldn’t be surprised if they got into another fight. Well, at least Nero would be able to stop them if it happens.

“Come on!!! Hurry up!! I wanna go ice skating!!!” A little kid, followed by others, zoomed by. This caused Lady to almost bump into someone. Vergil grabbed onto Lady’s hand and pulled her close to him. He pulled Lady to him with a bit more force than necessary. To keep her from falling onto him, Vergil twirled her into his arm. For a second, Vergil thought Lady leaned into him; tried to get closer to him. He quickly dismissed the thought. Believing it was his desire to be with her misinterpreting the situation. He unwrapped his arm, then released Lady’s hand.

Surprisingly, Vergil’s embrace was warm and welcoming. Lady wanted to stay in his embrace longer; to savor it. She could have sworn she felt Vergil nuzzle his face in her hair. Maybe she was delusional. Lady wouldn’t deny Vergil letting go of her so quickly hurt. Lady wasn’t completely upset. She knew Vergil wasn’t fully comfortable with physical contact. She wished he would be willing to hold her and let her hold him. She also wished Vergil would enjoy being with her.

“I think that’s Nico’s van.” Vergil looked ahead, noticing the beaten white van. Lady playfully challenged him to race to the van. It was no surprise Vergil won. It was a surprise he teleported ahead of Lady at the last second. Lady was ahead of him but not by much. He could have easily passed her. Because of this Lady teased Vergil about cheating. Vergil didn’t refute. He smiled to himself as he decided to let Lady have her fun.

“Why is it so cold in here?!” Vergil could see Lady’s breath with every word she said. He noticed Lady was trying her best to hide her shivering. Vergil never realized how easily humans could get cold. He wrapped his coat around Lady’s shoulders. Lady immediately accepted Vergil’s offer by sliding her arms through the coat’s sleeves.

“I told you earlier! The van’s heating stopped working. I tried to modify a part...something happened…” Nico cursed to herself as she made her way through the crowded town.

Lady fell asleep during the ride. Her head rested on Vergil’s shoulder. Vergil pushed some of Lady’s hair away from her eyes then let his mind wander. A few times, he snuck glances at her. Seeing her in his coat was pleasant. For a bit, Vergil believed Lady was truly his.

Dante was sitting at his desk already drunk from eggnog. Most of everyone else was putting up the last of the decorations. Trish was helping Kyrie put food on the table. Dante welcomed everyone back then declared the holiday party could officially begin. Confusion filled the air. Nico didn’t know Dante celebrated the holidays. Lady doesn’t remember Dante ever doing so. Vergil was trying to process what was happening. Nero explained that Dante needed an excuse to avoid seeing Patty. They shrugged it off, then went to do their own thing.

“Psst. Dante.” Nico grabbed Dante’s attention before anyone else could. She motioned for Dante to come to her. She waved her hand in front of her face. She didn’t expect Dante’s breath to reek of eggnog. Nico ignored it as she talked to him. “Hey, I think Vergil has a crush on Lady.”

“I AL-ALREADY KNOW LADY LI-IKES MY BROTH-HER! WHY DO YOU THI-INK I KEEP HAVI-ING HER GO ON MISSIONS WITH HIM?!” Dante’s drunken outburst was unexpected. Nico slapped her hand over Dante’s mouth to prevent him from blurting anything else. She whispered at Dante to shut up, then looked around them. A sigh of relief escaped Nico. Thank god, neither Lady nor Vergil were around.

Wait, did Dante say Lady likes Vergil? Nico got Dante to quietly repeat what he said. She had to make sure Dante wasn’t mixing up the names. After Nico got him to repeat Lady likes Vergil multiple times, she came up with an idea. She asked Dante if he wanted to help her get Lady and Vergil together. Dante replied to Nico’s mischievous offer with a smirk. Nico whispered some ideas to Dante. Dante left Nico to find Vergil. Nico recruited Trish to help her and Dante. Trish thought what they were doing was childish. She also thought it was about time Lady and Vergil got together. She noticed they both had feelings for each other months ago.

“So, I hear you like Vergil?” Trish teased Lady. A blush raced across Lady’s face. Lady was unsuccessful in convincing Trish it wasn’t true. Trish couldn’t stifle her laughter. She made Lady feel like a love-struck teenager all over again. Nico encouraged Lady to make the first move. Lady quickly brushed her and Trish off. She believed it was the holiday spirit taking over them. There was no indication that Vergil had feelings for her.

“Both of you say Vergil likes me. It doesn’t seem like it to me.” Lady told them about how Vergil’s been treating her recently. Nico and Trish assured Lady it was Vergil attempting to ignore his feelings. Lady sensed they weren’t lying. But what if they’re wrong?

“Drink this and confess already. I’ve been waiting for months.” Trish gave Lady the liquid courage Nico brought. Lady’s blush strengthened. She didn’t think her feelings for Vergil were so obvious. To make Trish and Nico leave her alone, Lady drank the liquid courage.

Vergil tried his best to behave. As the night progressed, Vergil got closer to losing it. Non-stop Dante has been bumping him into Lady. Vergil tried to ignore Dante. He even prepared himself for Dante’s drunken antics. Except Dante changed the amount of force with each push. Some bumps were feather light. Others felt as if Dante was a battering ram. He knew they weren’t accidental or at least not all of them. He couldn’t understand why Dante kept bumping him into Lady. Dante knowing his feelings for Lady never crossed his mind.

“Watch it, Dante!” Dante’s last bump made Vergil push Lady into a wall. Vergil pushed Dante away from him. He turned to Lady, checking to see if she was okay. Lady told Vergil her shoulder might bruise but she was alright. Vergil gave Lady’s shoulder a quick rub. He restrained himself from kissing her shoulder.

“Cccooome ooonnnn, Verge. Lighten up. It was an accident.” Dante made his way to the table holding the eggnog.

“Don’t you think you had enough for tonight?” Trish thought it was best to cut Dante off for the night. It wasn’t worth Dante and Vergil getting into a fight. She attempted to block Dante. Dante reached around Trish for another glass. Vergil swiped the glass from Dante. Dante reached for the glass as Vergil stretched himself as high up as he could. Everyone watched Dante climb onto Vergil to retrieve his eggnog. Vergil lost his balance causing him to spill the eggnog and Dante falling on top of him. Vergil pushed Dante off of him. Dante grieved his momentary loss, then remembered he could get another cup. Vergil carried Dante to his room. A loud “bang” followed by the sound of a lock could be heard from upstairs.

Lady watched Vergil go straight outside to the fire pit. She knew he wanted to calm himself before interacting with anyone else. The orange-yellowish glow revealed he was once again deep in thought. He stared into the flames as if he was searching for something. Lady went to Vergil with the hope of getting his mind off of whatever he was thinking. She greeted Vergil making sure her company was welcomed. His low hum was Lady's indication she wasn’t bothering him. Lady sat next to Vergil, facing her palms to the warm fire.

"Why did you come out here? I can tell you're already cold again?" Vergil wrapped his coat around Lady. Lady chuckled, amused Vergil would be so willing to lend her his coat so quickly. She explained that she was concerned about him. There was no reason for him to come outside by himself. For him to continue to be alone.

Vergil conversed with Lady. She took the opportunity to ask what Vergil thought of her. She explained he’s been more aloof around her than usual lately. She didn’t believe it was because she couldn’t handle herself on missions. So she concluded it was something else. Vergil apologized to her. He had no idea he was treating Lady so coldly. The last thing Vergil ever wanted her to believe was that he didn’t want to be around her. The temptation to tell Lady his true feelings for her were at their strongest. Finding the words to do so eluded him. He pushed his hair back, then stared into the flames. Lady sat back waiting for Vergil to explain himself.

“Ever since I returned from the Underworld, I’ve...been having difficulty adjusting to the human world.” Vergil solemnly looked at Lady. Lady sensed Vergil’s expression was asking her for something. She thought it was for reassurance and maybe compassion.

“You’re doing a better job than you think. Knowing you, it’s more than adjusting to your new life that’s bothering you.” Vergil chuckled at Lady’s statement. She was right. There was more. There always is.

Nico, Trish, and everyone else discreetly watched Lady and Vergil. No one could figure out what they were talking about. Nico couldn't wait any longer to find out if they were getting together or not. She snatched the mistletoe from the hallway. Nero and Trish attempted to stop Nico. Determined, Nico marched outside.

“I’ve also been trying to comprehend my feelings...for you. I think I lo-” The sound of Nico barging outside interrupted Vergil’s confession. Lady and Vergil were confused. It didn’t seem like anything of importance needed to be taken care of. Vergil could sense Dante was still locked in his room. No words were spoken as Nico held the mistletoe above Lady and Vergil. They hesitated.

The sound of racing heartbeats filled the air. No one knew how long Lady and Vergil stared at each other. Both of them were figuring out what to do: kiss or don't kiss. To them, they couldn't tell how the other would react. To everyone else, it was more than obvious Lady and Vergil have feelings for each other. Dante, no longer able to wait, screamed from his bedroom window. "COME ON, VERGE! KISS HER ALREADY!"

Vergil couldn’t ignore Dante’s drunken encouragement. He couldn't back out of kissing Lady. (Not that he wanted to.) If he did, Dante would never let him hear the end of it. Lady watched Vergil, wondering what was going to happen. The composure Vergil had dissipated. A rosy blush appeared on his cheeks. Oh how much he wished the flames could conceal it.

Vergil tentatively caressed Lady's cheek then kissed her. Lady's eyes widened but soon relaxed. Lady pushed Vergil's lips back onto hers as soon as they left. She wrapped her arms around Vergil’s neck, pulling him closer to her.

Everyone cheered, happy Lady and Vergil were finally getting together. If it was possible Lady and Vergil would have died from embarrassment. Dante’s drunken cheer became too much for anyone to handle. Even himself. Dante fell out the window when he tried to get a better view of his brother kissing Lady. Nico triumphantly left the two lovebirds to help Dante back inside.

Vergil pulled Lady into his lap, wrapping his arms around her waist. Lady’s arms rewrapped themselves around Vergil’s neck. She rested her head on his shoulder. Vergil gently ran his hand through Lady’s hair as he looked at her. Lady noticed Vergil’s expression was more relaxed than before. She could see the love he has for her in his eyes. A small smile formed as Lady kissed Vergil’s cheek. Vergil kissed Lady’s forehead, then her lips. He tightened his embrace as him and Lady watched the flames dance. Finally, they could enjoy their night together.

#dmcsecretsanta #dmcsecretsanta2020 #devil may cry #DMC #vergil #lady #vergil x lady #sfw

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velvyy · 4 years

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I remember you talking about Angel a little bit ago and how you didn't think he was as bad as everybody else was saying. What makes him appeal to you, I can't really get behind him in all honesty.

So I keep getting asks regarding to clarify my stance on Angel, and while I don’t mind this despite getting asks about it even now from HH fans and non-fans alike, receiving charitable and uncharitable asks and takes simultaneously from both, I might as well answer because I’m getting a bit tired of it. Not on here that often and every time there’s a new ask regarding it and I don’t understand why people want my take on this, despite me having already given one, or the clarification. That being said, my mind has changed a bit on the subject, and I kind of wanna give a small analysis on Angel and how I feel about him now, so here we are.

Firstly, the debate surrounding Angel Dust is off-putting to me because while I seemingly see both sentiments, I also feel as though they’re both simultaneously wrong. The positions are usually “Angel Dust represents a harmful stereotype that contributes to our marginalization and is a literal walking sex joke and nothing else.” and “Angel Dust is a hooker. A sex worker, prostitute. He’s supposed to be in hell. He’s supposed to be bad and awful. Moron” and really, I dislike both of these takes for rather similar reasons. Reason being is that I feel that it’s addressing the wrong thing here, which is the characterization of Angel, and not really what the over-arching narrative and well, show itself has to say about Angel, and I also feel that the issue here isn’t homophobia as much as it involves vilifying sex work potentially.

My issue with the first take is that obviously, we’ve barely scratched the surface with this character. I will say that the way he was introduced in the pilot was left to be desired. Not that he was offensive or meant to be a major middle finger to the gay community, but simply because we typically see big, larger, main traits of a character in a pilot. In Angel, we primarily see him embodying those things that many of the “HH hate crowd” disliked about him. Upon first introduction, he genuinely does come off as a stereotype, something that was written solely for the purpose of being “the gay” and nothing else admittedly. While said analysis is probably inaccurate, I don’t blame anyone for initially feeling that way, and coming to their own conclusions. Recognize that everybody’s opinion on Angel is all pretty much based on first impressions, because we only have so much to say about him at the moment. There isn’t even a show. It’s the pilot. Things even now can still change greatly. However, Angel in the show, being a prostitute, and a sex worker, seem very much rooted in his character primarily because many of his own personal struggles also lie in the fact that he’s someone who’s also victim to sexual assault, exploitation, which obviously has connections to his occupation. We can say that many of his actions are rooted in not only his job, and experiences, but also the mask he wears to hide his pain. I feel like to simply look at that and say “Fuck Angel Dust, he’s harmful.” is simultaneously neglecting a silent minority in the gay community that genuinely deals with the hardships of sex work in real life. You don’t see that type of humanity brought to the forefront in regards to gay sex workers in media. They’re usually there to be mocked at, and while you could say Angel comes off that way initially, additional context in the comics and Addict suggests otherwise. He’s not Alastor. He doesn’t have all these special abilities aside from being able to manifest guns and bombs, and probably shoot webs out of his anus or something. Angel is in pain, and in a situation where he feels stuck. He feels like he’s on a leash and only copes in the way he knows how, that being hedonistic actions and such. As to what the general narrative and world of Hazbin might have to say? We don’t know, and that could vary. We don’t have a conclusion as to what the world of Hazbin has to say about Angel, and whether or not he needs to be “redeemed” which is an issue I take on its own. I will get into that shortly.

I take issue with the second take for similar reasons as previously stated, but it has less to do with the analysis coming from the people who say this sort of thing, and more about what it reveals about the people saying “He’s a prostitute. He’s supposed to be in hell. He’s baaaaad.” Because it shows a type of reactionary sentiment that justifies the villainizing of sex workers, and also goes to show that they probably appreciate Angel’s character for the same reason those who despise Angel, are critical of. They find him funny potentially because in their mind, Angel is something to be mocked. Because he’s a “freak” in the sense that he’s this awful, slutty monster, seemingly missing the intentions behind writing Angel the way he is, as a way of potentially showing a sign of sympathy towards the livelihoods of real life sex workers. Instead these people probably don’t think too highly of people who work in that industry and view them as a circus act, the same way they might view Angel as the funny token gay man, and it shows that people appreciate this character for very different reasons. Not to mention, this take is not a very good defense. Does someone being in hell necessarily necessitate them to be “offensive?” A very non-offensive, non-confrontational, seemingly polite person could be the most awful person when the optics of civility are stripped away... Like a politician.

However, I end up pondering about what the narrative itself has to say about Angel needing to be redeemed. Because of the pilot’s highlight on his hypersexual manner, I end up asking myself what he needs to be redeemed from. His sex work and sexual nature certainly doesn’t make him a bad person. His violence probably does, but there’s so much emphasis on the sexual side of him and not the “gangster” side of him, and suggesting that people who are exploited by the industry they work in need to be “redeemed” almost insinuates like they’re doing something wrong. As if it potentially shares the same reactionary sentiment about sex workers that those who view Angel as a laughing stock do. Now, if “redemption” is a euphemism for “rehabilitation” then I would view this differently. However, in the pilot, the term “rehabilitation” and “redemption” are both used, seemingly interchangeably, despite both of these terms having different meanings. In terms of Hazbin, since we’re in hell, which is based on the Christian mythos (most likely also inspired by other cultural interpretations of a bad afterlife) “redemption” here is probably referring to the absolving of sins and what have you, although we don’t really know what Hazbin’s criteria for being worthy of Hell is, and said criteria is also never questioned. We just know that everybody there in hell is supposed to be bad as the latter say, and that’s that. They’re all “sinful”, all worthy of being considered bad people despite some clearly not being so... awful. Vaggie isn’t so awful. She’s a bit angry, but for a good reason. Why is she in hell with literal murderers, homophobes, gangsters, etc? Of course we don’t know much about her yet, but she seems substantially more innocent than say Alastor, who’s a literal serial killer. But according to fans, she’s in hell. So she’s bad. Bad people go to hell, and hell is where the bad people reside in, and all are in need of rehabilitation or “redemption” in order to achieve/attain heaven. (obligatory jojo reference heehee) Issue being that what’s good and bad is subjective, and despite nobody being morally perfect, they’re just in this place together with no real chance of redemption, while being told by the dominant structure and culture in hell that nobody really even wants to be “redeemed”, despite nobody wanting to be there, and probably housing some regret, only to be chained down by a culture of doubt, and many of these inhabitants probably not even really needing to be “redeemed.” There are people who are there for probably very irrational reasons, like stealing some stuff from a grocery store or something. Hell, even if someone is a murderer, what if they murdered in self-defense? Or trying to protect their family? Are they, a sinner, in need of being absolved, and to confess their sin of wanting to survive? Many “sinners” are probably people who come from unfortunate circumstances, and are forced to adapt to certain conditions that force them to do things that are considered “sinful.”

Of course, this is all very assumptive. For all we know, Hazbin could very well go into detail about this type of thing, and I’d be all for it. I feel like a lot of the former critique I’ve mentioned would be cleared away and people would be able to actually make a formed opinion on characters like Angel instead of the typical surface level takes I usually see. I’d be highly disappointed if the writers of Hazbin didn’t go down this route and question the very nature of this Heaven and Hell dichotomy and the moral code and structure presented. I have to clarify though. I’m not “behind” Angel. I acknowledge his character and how he’s written, and honestly thought the way he was shown initially was sub-par, and still believe that. My irritation revolves around fans and non-fans alike thinking they have a finalized idea of what Angel is, when they don’t, and then you have Youtubers making videos pretending it’s flawless while making statements about how stereotypes are apparently not harmful at all while making the assumption that every harsh criticism is a result of people wanting to ALL destroy Vivienne’s career when that’s just as reductive as saying that Viv is evil for shit she did years ago.

Aside from this, there’s still other things about Hazbin too. Vaggie even now I still can’t really see how she’s in anyway offensive or purposely off-putting. She’s angry because she has to react to a world who wants to take advantage of her, and her girlfriend. I’d be pissed too. She isn’t angry because she’s written to be the angry latina (despite Viv’s dumb tweet about “I’M A FIERY LATINA TOO WEE”). Alastor is a subject of discussion too because of the whole voodoo thing despite him passing as very, very caucasian and white, while also claims of cultural appropriation due to the certain iconography used when Alastor exhibits his power while playing into that “spooky voodoo” stereotype. I don’t have much to say on this because I’m simply not that familiar the religious practice aside from it having origins in Western Africa, and the Caribbean. Some say Alastor is biracial but that isn’t confirmed I don’t think. Some people say Hazbin is bad because of a Jeffery Dahmer joke, and saying that Katie Killjoy is proof of homophobia despite her being pointed out as an actual piece of shit with zero standards.

It’s all crazy. I look forward to what the Hazbin crew do with Hazbin, Helluva Boss, and especially Zoophobia. My mind is still open.

#hazbin hotel #vivziepop #angel dust #alastor #vaggie #demons

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crossroadsfossil · 3 years

Text

My Heart was Stolen at the Almost Villainous Cafe

Summary: Hawks gets an assignment to check out a bar that seems to be playing a little too close to fire with the ‘hot villains in your area’ trope.

Turns out ‘hot villains in your area’ wasn’t just figurative.

Tags: Mentioned rest of the league The league of villians is a cafe instead of a villian organization aka an excuse to put everyone in slutty vampire victorian clothing A03 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/31304501

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“They want me to… go to a bar.” Hawks said slowly, staring at the admin from the Commission. She offered him a small smile and shrugged.

“Technically, it’s an upscale mixed-style tea-house.” She said, sliding him a pamphlet, the tips of her ears turning nearly as red as his wings. “They say it’s not a host club but everyone goes there because, well. The men are hot.”

Hawks took the pamphlet. It was one of those small ones they offer at grand openings. It mostly consisted of the menu and a few interior shots. There were elegant tables and secluded booths, and he noted various western influences in the design. Victorian and victorian adjacent, with plenty of lace and velvet. They advertised a more traditional eastern teahouse, but there were no photos backing up the claim. His eyes caught on the images and descriptions of the drinks and snacks, with there being both tea and alcoholic beverages and a rather healthy listing of edible treats.

“Is that your personal opinion from experience?” Hawks asked, watching out of the corner of his eyes as her blush deepened. She gave a stuttered, embarrassed laugh.

“No, ah. Not. Not yet. Some of my friends were… enthusiastic about the place and took a few… photos. That they shouldn’t have. The men there are… hot.” She gave another stilted laugh, “Is there anything else you would like to know?

“No, just leave the docket. I’ll check in later tonight.” He said, waving her off.

Before she left the office, however, he called to her.

“Actually, could I get a copy of those photos?”

The administrator flushed a brighter red than he thought possible and it took everything in him not to laugh.

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Hawks took in the outside of the establishment.

For all the richness of the interior photos, the exterior was muted and almost drab. It blended in perfectly with the buildings on either side of it - one of which was a walk-in clinic and the other was advertising insurance. The first floor of the building was a hair salon, but looking at the sign, it seemed the three floors above it were all dedicated to the tea-house. Interesting.

“Real flattered you decided to take me on a fancy date.” Rumi teased, leaning into his side as she took in the building. “You always get such fun assignments.”

“You were assigned this too.”

“Only because you requested it. What happened, Endeavor turned down your invite? Or was it Best Jeanist?”

“Actually, will you be insulted if I said Gang Orca and Fatgum turned me down?”

Rumi laughed and dragged him inside.

“Nah. I am surprised Taishiro turned you down.” She said as they waited for the elevator to take them up. Hawks had to school his expression quickly to hide his look of surprise. He wasn’t aware that Rumi and Fatgum were friendly with each other, let alone on what seemed to be a first-name basis.

“He had something with the police going on tonight. And for the rest of the week.”

“Boo. He would have loved this.” Rumi said as Hawks opened the door for her, although she swatted his arm. “Suck up.” She teased, her smile fond. He watched as it turned from fond to a strange, gleeful smile that stretched over her face, threatening to split it open. When he followed her gaze, he understood why.

There was a rather impressively stocked bar before them, with two people behind it. One of them was a man who looked more mist than man and was diligently cleaning glasses. The other was a man in a mask who was performing magic tricks with several patrons’ drinks, making the liquid disappear and reappear and change colors. Hawks watched for a moment before looking over the rest of the room. The photos in the pamphlet hadn’t done it an ounce of justice. The only words he could come up with were ‘rich’ and ‘decadent’ and ‘sumptuous’.

The hostess who greeted them gave them both a long, appreciative look, although it wasn’t like the usual lusting look that fans wore. She looked like she wanted to eat them. She was polite however, and led them to a corner booth. He wasn’t even sure she had recognized them.

Neither he nor Rumi were wearing anything resembling their hero outfits. Hawks had shed most of his feathers, reducing them to mere stubs he could hide beneath his jacket and he’d actually combed his hair into something resembling order. Rumi was similarly disguised, wearing some girlish headband with a flower on it. She’d even done something to bob both her hair and ears, shortening both and giving her an almost mousey appearance. Combined with the glasses she was wearing, she didn’t look a thing like Miruko. He didn’t want them to be immediately noticeable, but he was slowly realizing Rumi had done a better job at hiding who she was than Hawks had, and he was rapidly losing any hope that he would go unnoticed. At worst, people would assume they were on a date, and it certainly wouldn’t be the first time people had made that mistake.

“Oh wow.” Rumi said as they sat down at a corner table, the grin over her face looking almost obscene as she ate the eye candy around them and didn’t bother to be subtle about it.

Hawks was beginning to regret bringing her. He opened the menu, nose shoved in it, and already picking out his first three drinks and at least half a dozen small tea cakes and sandwiches.

“Welcome to Almost Villainous Cafe. Anything I can steal for you?” A low voice asked. Hawks mumbled something about needing a moment. He could almost feel the grin on Rumi as she leaned onto her elbows and closer to the waiter.

“Depends on what you’re stealing.” She purred.

“I was honestly thinking about his wallet. Or heart. Whichever is easier.” The waiter joked. Rumi laughed.

“Not his wallet. He wears that on a chain like a dweeb.” Rumi replied, elbowing him in the ribs. Hawks glared at her, ready to snap something rude when she kicked him under the table. He rolled his eyes and looked to the waiter, intent on ordering.

He suddenly realized why Rumi was so interested- She kept looking between Hawks and the Waiter.

The waiter who was, despite the intense scarring, incredibly attractive. High-waisted pants, a billowy shirt that looked about two steps from being sheer, just hinting at additional scaring and what looked like more piercings.

“The heart it is, if the lady isn’t opposed.” The waiter grinned, leaning over and lighting the candles on the table. With his fingers. The gesture combined with the wink he shot Hawks sent a low curl of interest thrumming through his core.

Oh. Fuck.

#bnha fic #bnha ficlet #my fic #dabihawks fic #dabihawks

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moonah-rose · 3 years

Text

King Takes Knight (Part 6)

Eleanor has a choice.

(Part One)

(Part Two)

(Part Three)

(Part Four)

(Part Five)

“Okay. If you’re gonna do this. You need to have a plan.”

Eleanor closes the door to Michael’s office. Funny, she still thinks of it as his, even when she’s spent more time occupying it alone so far this year. She tries to avoid being here alone. It’s far too painful to sit in the big chair and watch the door, wishing with all her heart that the dumb demon will waltz back in, safe and sound, at any moment.

She walks across the room and around the desk. His jacket is still thrown over the back of the chair from when he quickly got changed between Mindy’s and the train station. The stains from Glenn’s goo seem to have evaporated.

There’s a tug in her chest as she strokes the fabric.

“I have a plan! I’m gonna lift the barricade up, disguise myself as a Bad Janet, go in, find Michael and get him out. Easy peasy lemon squeezy. Fun fact, a man named John White invented the lemon squeezer because they’re not easy to squeeze at all-.”

“Okay, no, that plan sucks. It’s exactly what they’ll expect because it’s what you already did. You can’t go in there on your own.”

Janet frowns; “Are you going to suggest you guys come too? Because as you said, that’s the last thing Michael would want, for you guys to be put in danger. I’m not mortal, the threat to my wellbeing is less of a risk, and you can always ask the Judge for a reset in the event of a second capture.”

“I wasn’t going to suggest that...But we’re not your only option.” Eleanor says, looking over to Derek in the corner, licking a light bulb like a popsicle.

Her hands pick the jacket up. She holds it close to her front, inhaling the scent in the collar. That strange smell she always picked up whenever near to Michael, like something out of an old attic and yet sweeter than chocolate and warm like a nearby bonfire tickles her nose.

Fingers curl tightly into the grey wool. She doesn’t want this to be the most she has left of him anymore. She wants him back.

The doofus had one job to do for her and he couldn’t...

Eleanor sighs and slips her arms into the jacket before taking a seat in the chair. It’s far too big for her, almost like an overcoat or a bathrobe. She wraps it tight around her frame as she slumps back in the seat. Something about wearing it makes her feel as if he’s there, the same reason why she always takes one of Chidi’s sweaters to bed with her, like a needy kid with a security blanket.

All her life she secretly dreamed of having at least one person to truly love her. Then two come along at once and they both end up sacrificing themselves.

Couldn’t she have fallen in love with someone as selfish as her?

“Hey Eleanor.” Janet bings in front of the desk.

She jumps, starting a little, pulling her face out of the collar she had been close to crying into.

“I wasn’t doing anything.” She hurriedly covers, sitting up straight, attempting some semblance of dignity; “W-what’s up?”

“I’ve finished making enough Janet babies I need to take with me. They’re all boarded on the train, including the clones of you guys. Even I gotta say, they’re pretty creepy. But great idea!”

Eleanor just nods, fingers tapping the desk. If she couldn’t come with Janet on the rescue mission then the best she could do was lend her strategic skills.

“And the demon exploders?” Thanks for that, Bad Janet.

“I think I was able to improve on the design after examining the one Michael handed to me before he...” She cuts herself off, “We’ll be fine, Eleanor. I made quite a few in case they rumble us.”

“If you have to, be sure to burst a few for me, won’t you.” She tells her sexy not-robot friend; “And please...be safe, babe.”

And bring him back, she doesn’t say, almost as if it was asking too much.

It doesn’t need saying.

“We’ll be back before you know it. Literally, because you won’t be alerted of my train coming in with me gone and Derek’s sensor is busted.”

She bings out of the room. Eleanor sits back again, arms wrapped around herself and the jacket. Now she’s back to where she was a few months ago, wishing for her friends safe return, while the fate of humanity hangs in the balance. She has no choice. She has to stay. Put the experiment first. It’s what Michael and Chidi both sacrificed themselves for. It would be insulting them if she were to make it all for nothing.

It must be a trick.

They’ve got bored of the freezing and the hooks and the violent fish. Now they wanna screw up his head. He already hallucinates, isn’t that enough? He would normally think this was just another one of those but...Nicole’s goo drips from his nose. Yep, she definitely blew up.

And there, almost a yard behind her, is....the Impossible.

Eleanor stands with Bad Janet’s demon exploder clutched in her hand, arms straightened in front of her, blue goo from other demons staining her red sweater and the black leather jacket he hasn’t seen her wear in a while. Sneaky little so-and-so. Did she really come all the way down here, shooting her way through immortal guards, to...rescue...him...?

He would laugh, if the wave of exhaustion wasn’t crushing him down, as well as the wires in his mouth. It’s too much. He’s held out for far too long and now his mind has snapped.

Don’t fall for it, Mike. Don’t give them the satisfaction of hoping.

She wanted him gone. Out of her hair for good. She wanted him to-

His body goes slack in his ice chains as the underworld goes dark.

He loves you.

He lied.

He loves you.

He tortured them for centuries and lied about it, over eight hundred times.

He loves you.

He didn’t trust her enough to say what he really was underneath the suit. He thought she was shallow enough to not want to be friends with him after finding out he’s some giant flaming squid. He was supposed to be her best friend! Did he think so little of her? After all those weeks of supporting her, encouraging her, giving her a shoulder to cry on, followed by a gentle kick up the ash to get her shirt together?

And as if she was going to be all soft and reassure him of how much he meant to her after the crab he put her through that night. He expected her to be the one to apologise!?

He loves you.

You must know that. You’re not an idiot.

Oh...the stupid demon loves her enough to disobey her one order and not come back safe! The stupid demon offers to blow himself up in order to give her peace of mind when she doesn’t trust him and leave her in charge of this shirt show on her own. The dumb, reckless ash-hole stayed behind to be tortured, again, for their sakes...Not for the first time.

Fork. She is an idiot!

Eleanor shrugs off the jacket and grabs her own leather one off the back of the door. She has a train to catch.

Damn it, why didn’t she take a better coat with her? Or a scarf? Or gloves?

The chamber she discovers Michael in is like a huge igloo. Every surface seems to be made of ice except, thank Kim, the floor, or else she’d be falling flat on her ass as soon as she strode in after taking out the slutty demoness who had been messing with Michael. Eleanor steels herself, braving the cold and letting the adrenaline warm her up after having snuck her way down here, taking out a few necessary obstacles on the way with her new favorite toy.

Her heart beats terribly fast as she spots Michael chained up, pale as a ghost, slumped in the shackles they’ve put him in. His clothes are ragged and torn up, the wounds from where he’s been recently cut and sliced and scalded all too evident to the naked eye.

“Michael...!” She breathes his name as she reaches him, finding no response as his head rolls forward; “Michael, I’m here! Wake up!”

She puts her hands to his chin and tries to lift it up, cringing at the awful sight of what they’ve done to his mouth. Jesus!

Digging around in what remains of the slutty demon’s goo and dress fragments, she eventually finds the key to the shackles. She fumbles with it in the locks as she works to set him free.

As she works to open the second one, she drops it. Fuck! Get it together, Shellstrop! They could come in at any moment!

She scoops it up and turns it in the blisteringly cold metal.

Michael tumbles to the ground in a heap of long limbs.

“Shit, shit, shit!” Eleanor curses as she fails to catch up, the dumb tree too much for her to attempt to lift upright on her own. She kneels over him; “Dude, c’mon! Come on, get up! Michael!”

Her fingers brush against her cheek and-

“FUCK!” She curses, pulling her hand back.

He’s almost too cold to touch. There’s flecks of snow on his eyelashes and in his white hair, lines on his face deeper than she remembers, skin sunken in, littered with black and purple marks.

Eleanor places one hand on his back, the other on his chest, just barely able to keep hold of him with the remnants of his shirt beneath her palms.

She wishes she could feel his heartbeat, if he had one.

Just some sign, anything, anything at all...that he’s going to open his eyes again. That she wasn’t too late.

“Michael, you need to get up! You can’t bail on me now, please, not after I finally got here! You gotta come home, dude....I can’t do this without you. Just wake the fuck up before-.” Her teeth start to chatter as she hears footsteps racing from outside.

Someone’s coming. More guards? The Janet baby army? A couple were lost on the way, marbleised, before Eleanor was able to zap the guards. Then she had to abandon the rest in order to get to the location Janet sent over the intercom to one of her baby’s, Ralfio’s, mouth.

Eleanor has no idea what’s about to come through that door. Friend or foe. Janet(s) or demons.

She’s not giving up now.

Keeping hold of Michael on her lap, she sets her jaw, getting out the demon exploder from her jacket pocket, firing it up.

“I won’t let them touch you, bud. Not again.” She whispers, clutching his lifeless skinsuit close to her front; “That’s a promise.”

Her hand is steady around the weapon, her eyes glaring with hellfire at the entrance. She forgets about the cold.

Just try to take him away from me again, demon scum. Just try it.

(illustration by @star-pepper xx)

#whump #angst #rescue #tgp fanfic #i will beta this before it goes on ao3 #i wasn't expecting a plot it just happened #tgp fanart

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hermannsthumb · 5 years

Note

OHMYGOD FOR THE HALLOWEEN PROMPT THE -IM THE ONLY ONE WHO GETS YOUR COSTUME AND THAT MAKES YOU WANT TO TEAR OFF MY CLOTHES- is CHEFS KISS on bro it works either way

from list of halloween prompts here

HELL YES!!! HAPPY HALLOWEEN EVERYONE heres some newt and hermann fucking. 18+ not sfw below cut

----------------------------------------

Things happen with Newton, Hermann’s learned to understand, as if Newton himself were a great, tumbling human avalanche: they happen very fast, all at once, and typically with a great deal of destruction left in their wake. Newton never plans in advance. Newton throws himself, spur of the moment, into every idea he has. Newton has never cared about insignificant little things like repercussions. Newton lives in the now.

In a way, it’s admirable.

In other ways--the way, for example, Newton has thrust a hand down Hermann’s trousers, his tongue down Hermann’s throat--it’s wildly overwhelming.

One hour ago, they were at a Shatterdome Halloween party, and Newton strolled in wearing the most absurd costume Hermann had ever seen: skimpy monk robes, of all things, the skirt cropped ridiculously short, slit up the side, the neck deep-cut, hood pulled up. A small apron was tied over that. He held a large potted plant.

“How’s the party so far?” he called over to Hermann.

Hermann ogled, of course. He also pretended he wasn’t ogling. Newton had very nice legs--stocky, sturdy, thick, ending in very soft thighs--and Hermann often liked to imagine what they would look like wrapped around Hermann’s waist, or perhaps spread wide and lifted up high, or what Hermann’s fingers would look like splayed across one of those soft thighs. It was difficult to look at Newton (and his prominently displayed legs) now and not immediately begin to fantasize. “Hm,” Hermann said, eloquently.

Newton strode over to him. He was already a cocky little bastard as is, but Halloween always gave him an extra level of confidence that sent his ego skyrocketing through the roof. God help them all. “What are you supposed to be?” he said. “I don’t recognize your costume.”

This was because Hermann was not wearing a costume. Hermann never wore a costume, not unless it was under duress (typically Newton-applied duress), and this was the first year in recent memory no one made him put on Vulcan ears or a Sherlock Holmes hat. “I’m a physicist,” Hermann said.

“You’re so lame,” Newton said. He smoothed his hand over his skirt and grinned, clearly eager to sway the conversation topic over to himself. It was why, after all, he wore costumes like this every year he could: for the attention. He usually got it. “I bet you can’t guess mine. No one’s been able to.”

Hermann seized the chance to stare at Newton’s legs some more. (One thing that was nice about the skirt was that Hermann wouldn’t have to waste time stripping Newton out of a bunch of layers--he could just lift it up. Hypothetically, of course.) When he finally dragged his eyes away and up to the potted plant, a closer inspection revealed it was a common pea plant. “Oh,” Hermann said. A great classic costume of Halloween--‘slutty’, as Newton would say, variations on everything. “I see. You’re meant to be an--ah--loose Gregor Mendel. How charming.”

Newton’s grin slipped away. “Holy shit,” he said.

This excited Newton, for some reason, and he was flinging himself at Hermann (to Hermann’s pleased bewilderment) no more than five minutes later, with pleads for Hermann to call him loose again, among a host of other rather degrading terms, and assuring Hermann that he was an expert on breeding and that he’d be more than happy to give Hermann a demonstration.

“I think that’s somewhat of a biological impossibility for us,” Hermann told him, but this was when Newton shoved his hand down Hermann’s trousers, and Hermann did not feel much like arguing the point from then on.

“Don’t you think,” he says now, “we ought to go one of our quarters? For more--” He groans, and gives Newton’s hair a sharp tug, “--oh, hell, for more privacy? You’re good at this.”

“Mm,” Newton agrees. He pulls off of Hermann’s prick for only a moment, long enough only to say “No, I’m good here” and press a sloppy kiss to the tip. Then he sucks him back down, deep enough his nose brushes Hermann’s pubic hair. By Jove--he is good at this.

The supply closet is too dark for Hermann to properly see Newton, beyond the vaguest shape of his body and the occasional glint of his glasses in the small bit of light from the crack under the door. It’s a bit of a shame, really; Hermann would like to see him. He would like to burn the image of Newton on his knees with his incessantly running mouth finally stuffed full into his brain forever. “Newton,” he says, “ah, I would--I would prefer it.” He finally admits, a little shyly, “I would like to see you. And touch you.” He would also like to get the chance to wrap those legs around him, and he’s not sure they’d be able to do it here without knocking a great deal of cleaning products over and causing a mess.

Newton pops off again. “You’re adorable,” he laughs. His voice is already a little cracked from the blowjob. “Okay, fine. Then I can tear your ugly fucking clothes off of you already.” A kiss to the base of his prick. “Mine or yours, baby?”

“Baby,” Hermann echoes, faintly. Newton flicks his tongue over him again, and Hermann’s knees start to wobble dangerously. His sweaty hand slips on his cane. “Guh--Newton, I said--”

“Couldn’t help it,” Newton says. “You sound so funny. Okay, mine it is, but I’m totally putting on the spooky Halloween sound effects record.”

Newton was not kidding. Hermann manages to tune it out eventually, though the occasional witch cackle still makes him jump.

“Grab my ass,” Newton urges into his mouth. He’s a bit over-eager when it comes to kissing, too much teeth and tongue, not enough finesse. Twice he’s bitten Hermann’s tongue instead of his lip. “Mm, wait, no, under the robe, under it. Don’t be shy, dude, you just had your dick--”

“Okay,” Hermann says. He obeys. Newton gives a wanton moan.

“Fuck yeah,” he whimpers. He sits up to roll their hips together (Hermann, still achingly hard from their closet tryst, Newton getting there as well) while Hermann continues to squeeze at his round rear, and then unceremoniously rips Hermann’s shirt open. A button pings off the glass of water on Newton’s side table; the rest go who-knows where else. Hermann can’t say he’s too upset. “You’re so good at this. Fuck.”

“I’m just laying here,” Hermann says.

“It’s hot,” Newton says. He rips the front of his own robes open a bit wider, giving Hermann a glimpse of two hard pink nipples, then begins to slip down Hermann’s body. Hermann’s prick is back in his mouth and then down his throat in moments. The record switches to chains rattling and ghostly moans.

How strange this all is. “You wanna fuck my pecs?” Newton suddenly says, popping up again. His lips are pink and slick with Hermann’s precome and his own saliva. Hermann notices he’s begun pinching at his nipples with the hand he’s not got wrapped around Hermann. “Then you can jizz on my face.”

“You are obscene,” Hermann wheezes, but his prick gives a very obvious twitch at the thought of a messy, filthy Newton kneeling over him. He’s always harbored secret fantasies of dirtying up his glasses, too.

Newton grins.

Hermann will admit it’s a strange sensation, but it’s not a bad one, especially not with the gorgeous little grunts Newton is making all the while, the way his pink tongue is poking between his pink lips in concentration. He does not even have to take his robe off for it. “You’re very good at this, too,” Hermann remarks. He thinks Newton is, anyway; he doesn’t have much to compare it too.

“I know,” Newton says. He winks. “Okay, are you gonna come soon? I’m getting kinda--”

Almost on cue, Hermann’s orgasm catches Newton mid-sentence: his release lands on Newton’s chest, neck, and mouth in equal parts, staining his tattoos. Newton blinks. He drops his hands. “Cool,” he says. He adjusts his glasses.

Once he finally has the breath to spare (the record having moved along into Toccata and Fugue in D Minor) Hermann declares “I would like to suck you off under your skirt.”

“Cool,” Newton repeats.

#newmann #maria's fanfiction tag #Anonymous

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the-fiction-witch · 5 years

Text

Meet Me In Hyde Park

REAL LIFE COUPLE TBS X READER RATING SMUTT AF

I yawned turning over in my soft cosy bed, I giggled feeling my favourite toy under me so I grabbed it and pulled it out from under my stomach my nice blue plastic vibrator I must have fallen asleep when I was done again so I go out my bed pulling down my shirt to hide my naked pussy even if I am alone, I pulled off the duvet to make my bed seeing all the toys from last night and the obvious wet patch in the middle of my bed, I giggled blushing hard so I got my phone and sent a picture to my boyfriend starting to pack It all away

Thomas 💜🍆:

Oooohhh good morning.

Somebody was a busy girl this morning ;) <3

Y/n (◍•ᴗ•◍)❤:

Not this morning last night after you went to bed 😍😍

Thomas 💜🍆:

Ohhh? So you lied to me?

You said you where going straight to sleep?

That you where tried.

You dirty little liar.

Do I have to come over there and give you a spanking this morning

Y/n (◍•ᴗ•◍)❤:

Noooo I'll be good Tommy,

I just missed you too much 😭😭

Thomas 💜🍆:

Ohhh? My little princess missed me so much she had to fuck herself with her plastic toys?

I best not leave you alone so long again.

It's alright princess,

Thank you for the sexy picture of your dirty bed ;)

You think you could manage one of you in your PJ's? Masters trying to deal with his morning wood princess

Y/n (◍•ᴗ•◍)❤:

I don't know If i should Tommy, maybe If I knee what you where up to?

Maybe you should send one so it's fair?

Thomas 💜🍆:

Humm....

Can't argue with that logic princess ;)

I stood making myself a cup of tea having at last gotten dressed I still felt all giggly often rubbing my thighs together as I stood making tea as I heard my phone go off

Thomas 💜🍆:

Hey, what you up to today princess?

Y/n (◍•ᴗ•◍)❤:

Nothing, just staying at home watching TV why?

Thomas 💜🍆:

Meet me in Hyde Park, at 11.

I wanna see my little princess 😘😘😘😘😘

So I giggled and got ready having a quick shower and getting changed into the little yellow dress I know Thomas likes me in and heading off on the tube to Hyde park having to avoid the lust eyes of people on the underground I felt someone slap my arse as I stood on a platform checking my watch and I sighed going up to Hyde park entrance where Thomas was stood in his dark blue jeans and light blue button down with his leather jacket too, his hair a mess and his sunglasses over his eyes a cigarette in his lips as his hands dug around in his jacket pockets for his lighter to lit said ciggerette, I was a little surprised to see his stubble he had last I saw him had grown so much but I suppose he's happy and I was curious what it would feel like when kissing him and when doing..other things that involve that mouth. He found the lighter in the back pocket of his jeans lighting the ciggerette and putting his lighter back taking the ciggerette from his mouth and blowing the smoke out as he did he spotted me and a smirk crawled onto his lips and he wolf whistled at me

"You wore the dress I like" he smirked

"I did" I giggled going closer and he smirked putting his ciggerette out and giving me a cuddle wrapping his arms around me his hands on the small of my back so I rested my own on his chest as he rested his chin on my head

"Hello Princess" he smiled

"Hi Tommy" I giggled "I missed you"

"N'awww I missed you too" he says giving my head a kiss so I nuzzled closer "come on, let's go for a walk" he says holding my hand and tugging me along with him.

After a while we found a cosy spot anyway from most people next to a few bushes we sat down on the grass and I cuddled into his shoulder

"N'awww hello princess" he smiled wrapping his arm around me sitting his hand on my waist and pulling me closer to him I smiled sitting up and giving his lips a kiss he smiled giving me a kiss too then one on my cheek and another on my jaw and little kisses down my neck starting to make a hiki making me giggle "ummm I've missed you Princess" he smirked between kisses and sucks on my neck and I felt his hand going under my dress so I stopped him "what's the matter?" He asks

"Thomas what are you doing?" I complain

"I wanted to fool around with my princess, why?" He asked

"But Thomas where outside, in the middle of Hyde park and we-" I began

"But we haven't seen each other in months, can't blame me for.... wanting to make my girlfriend feel good again" he smirked trying to kiss me I let him kiss me his hand resting on my knee I happily kissed back I noticed his hand moving to my thigh but I didn't worry about it not until it reached my panties

"Thomas!" I said pushing his hand away and he did not look happy with me

"Y/n" he sighed "I've been away nearly six months, I haven't seen you in almost seven, all that time away from my beautiful girlfriend, and when I do finally get to see her again, you wear that slutty little dress you know I can't resist, and you won't even let me play with your pretty little princess parts? How's that fair" he complained

"You can Thomas just not here" i complain

"Well...we both know I can't wait till we get back to your place" he smirked grabbing my hand and rubbing my hand on his hard buldge in his jeans "and my place is even further, ohh well guess I'll have to fuck you here" he smirked grabbing my waist and pulling me onto his lap he instantly licked his bottom lip looking at me sat on him as he held my hips and moved me ontop of him "uuummmmm princess, just a little play, it's all I ask darling" he smirked pulling my dress down to expose my breasts as I didn't wear a bra today I instantly tried to cover my bare chest but he slapped my hands away holding then tight behind me with his own "humm" he chuckled "and you didn't want me to fuck you? Why else would my little princess not wear her bra unless she was expecting masters cock" he smirked groping my breast with his free hand and kissing the other he gently biting and sucking on the other nipple

"Thomas no!" I complain trying to pull my dress up deathly afraid of someone seeing us

"No? N'awwwww you really think you have a choice darling" he smirked pushing me down onto the grass "you let me or I'm handcuffing those rejecting little hands behind your back and using you like a whore? Your choice Princess" he growled

"Thomas no someone will see us" I complain

"Cuffs it is then princess" he smirked I tried to fight him but Thomas knows me to well and he's fair to strong for me as he and cuffed my wrists behind my back with a little metal pair he had in his jacket pocket forcing me to lay on the tickly grass on my little dress "uuummmm look at my pretty little princess, laid on the grass with her tits and he pussy out" he smirked flicking my dress up revealing my little white lace panties If anyone where to glance over to us they would have seen everything I tried to shut my thighs but Thomas wasn't having that he pushed my thighs as apart as they would go and smirked rubbing on my clit thought my thin panties with his rough fingers I was surprised they where so rough but he must have been motorcycle tinkering again his hands always get rough when he's tinkering I groaned trying to squirm away from his pleasurable touching "humm no, don't run away" he smirked "give into it darling, accept the pleasure" he growled "cum for me y/n, right here in Hyde park, where everyone can see what a slut you are" he smirked between kisses down my neck "let master play with your Princess parts beautiful" he smirked

"Thomas" I whined

"N'awww is it not enough princess? Does it not feel as good as normal? How about I go under these slutty panties then? Or better yet how about I just rip them off? Let the whole of London see your princess parts" he smirked tugging at the lace

"No Thomas in begging please" I plead but it was too late as he ripped them off me shredding the lace throwing it onto the grass rubbing in my clit and slipping his finger a little inch inside me

"Ummm so wet" he groans "I know you love when we play outside darling" he smirked Pushing his fingers deep inside me slowly finger fucking me as his thumb rubbed my clit he laid beside me on the grass his other hand gropeing my chest

"Thomas....stop it" I whine

"Not till my Princess cums" he smirked speeding up his hand "so cum, before I take that dress off you too and leave you naked where everyone can see you" he smirked "maybe I'll leave you here, chain you up like a little puppy and leave you for all those other London men to come and use all your pretty holes princess" he smirked

"No Thomas please" I begged

"N'aww don't worry Princess I wouldn't do that, your all mine. You really think I could bare the thought of someone else touching you Princess, I just know you like when they can look" he growled "makes you feel good doesn't it, knowing they could see your princess parts if they only looked over at you, because your a little whore and you love to let them watch" he smirked "come on Princess cum for me, before I raw fuck that pussy of yours and leave you naked dripping my seed on the fucking grass baby"

"Uhhhhh Thomas!" I sqeualed trying to be quiet as I rocketed into an orgasum riding it out on his fingers as I squirted onto my dress and the grass

"N'awww that's my girl" he smiled giving my lips a little kiss and pulling my dress up to cover my breasts Letting me out the handcuffs "your place, let's go Princess" he smirked pulling me up off the grass and rushing off to the tube station...

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cleverbroadwayurl · 5 years

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Can’t Help Falling in Love (Jeremy Heere x Reader Pt 15 Supplement)

Song: Can’t Help Falling in Love cover by Pentatonix

Want More? I’m just gonna link my masterlist here because usually I do a sequence but it might be a little hard to figure out what order to link it in

Word Count: 4984

A/N: Hey! I finally got this done! Yay! I’m going to tag everyone who I usually tag in this series so they’ll see it! That being said: do not feel inclined to read this part. It’s heavily triggering, even to me, and has some extremely mature themes. If you need to stop reading at any time, I will never be offended or encourage you to read. You have the right to stop reading at any time. This part is not extremely important to the story and was originally not going to be posted. Because of that, this piece will not show up in the tags. It’s not fair to post something so intense. The next part should be out next weekend, if you choose to skip this one. Please enjoy this part, and thank you so much for following!

Trigger Warnings: Nonconsensual actions (nothing under the umbrella of sexual assault), implications of abuse, physical abuse, emotional abuse, verbal abuse, mentions of mental health issues, mentions of cheating, implied cheating, self depreciation, battered wife syndrome symptoms, IF I MISSED ANYTHING ELSE PLEASE NOTIFY ME RIGHT AWAY SO I CAN FIX IT

Taglist: @be-more-heidi-hansen @retrogarden @catatonic-kuragin @scarsonthecuffsofyourjeans @bluhimaweirdo @stargirl-murphy

You: See you on Thursday, Jeremy :) You: Have a wonderful rest of your night

Time ticked slower and slower, each passing second dragging on. Seconds turned into years of wasting away, waiting for just the right moment to make an escape, a checked line through and through painting its way through your mind, precluding any specific thoughts. The plan was set, everything prepared, but for now, everything to was remain static, a secret, hanging in silence, stuck on another plane of reality; daydreaming itself.

The air was still, everything in the all-too-white room with the little black leather chairs pretending that everything was okay, that this wasn’t a ploy; a scam, that nothing would happen except what was already going on. The scene was set, light coming in from the lame dome light on the greyish textured ceiling, a little window that was placed elegantly above the TV, it portraying freedom, daydreams of your feet walking around on the upper floor towards the front door and away into freedom that was craved by exactly one person in the small split level house. Hands glued to controller, eyes resting on the screen, sweaty palms, hands shaky, arms around another; everything meticulously given, set like the opening scene of a play, nothing feeling real except the seconds ticking and ticking, one right after another.

You sat on the left, just like you always did: close to the sliding doors but far from the single escape that was an actual viable option. The glass doors were always locked, animals hungry for some action outside—whether that be real monsters or humanistic ones lurking outside. Far enough away that any spare seconds would be to devoting you back into the room. It was the bottom floor of the split-level blue house, one that you knew by heart—well, except the upstairs. But everything else had been fair game: garage sitting across from the room you’d sat in, your car parked outside in such a way that people were able to enter and exit freely: a distinct difference to what you’d known, keys still on the ground, arranged in the way you’d set them a few hours before, next to clutter that would be too painful to step on, too precious to have something so violent happen to it—at least you’d assumed, it was just glorified garbage that rested on both sides of the chairs, tv set on white cabinet that was probably imported from Ikea. Summer heat slipped into the room, but a weak air conditioner kept it from getting too warm. Tacky blue plaid curtains that resembled a pajama shirt—baby blue in color, matched with white—were drawn, no one could see in, the house almost too far away from civilization, too soundproof for anyone’s liking.

The room extended backwards, your boyfriend’s sister’s belongings strewn about, untouched, but loved ever so much by both girls. A balance beam, a mat, and pink littered the back corners. You’d once smiled and laughed when they were in the room. You both had. But now, right now, they were banished. Everyone was banished. You can’t remember if the door was locked, you can’t remember about an hour ago, seconds still rhythmically ticking into oblivion. Only one thought lingered as you readjusted your palms, sweat making everything too slippery—did they know? They were younger than him, the eldest not even a decade old. A choice appeared on the screen, and almost immediately, everything left except the seconds. Choices are timed, the red bar across the screen moving slower than you’re used to; it’s been doing that all night, all day, from the moment you’d sat down on this Thursday. One quick hand stroke, button pressed, life continuing on, the sun setting, and that dumb clock ticking down the seconds that you’d been counting for hours. No amount of quick-time, decisions, or focusing on not letting others die would allow for any speeding up, everything working at a speed that would only be favorable to sloths or snails. You weren’t either.

His arm is around you—maybe that’s why it feels warmer than usual. Head against your shoulder, occasional, slutty kisses given, kissing between loading screens, socks, shorts, t-shirts, while you’re stuck in a sweater, unsure of what littered your arms. Exhale. Out of sight, out of mind. Your eyes refocused on the screen, but your mind still stuck in soft focus. Seconds, about 7, before he exhales onto your skin and you shudder, panic coursing through your veins not at maximum speed, but enough to probably cause some health problems. Your body isn’t screaming to run yet, but your chest gets heavy, limbs glued to the same shitty black leather seat, hoping for that text that would allow you to step out into the real world, into the freedom that was desired.

Wrapped around him, he wrapped around you. Hands illegally roaming until they finally rested and weighed you to the leather seat that you desperately never wanted to see again. Your phone remained in your pocket, almost begging for a vibration as your eyes shifted over the subtitles, each color almost painful as his grip tightened, giving something like a hug—but that wasn’t quite it. Your feelings were numb, almost cold to the touch. Eyes trained, fake smiles, complete embarrassment at wrong choices because you were thinking about that selfish freedom, thinking about being anywhere but there, too afraid to admit to yourself that maybe you didn’t like hanging out with him. What if he’s a mind reader? What if he knows you’re leaving for a better experience in a park at 9:30? You exhale; another kiss burning into your skin, pain lingering around the wound.

In the middle of a choice, the room seemingly darker, the golden hour long gone, your phone finally vibrates, interrupting the counting of ever passing seconds with a joyous symphony. 9:15. He’s early. Thank god. You hoped it wasn’t a cancellation for some reason or another, that it wasn’t something that would cause you to perpetually be there until you could get away for even just a slight second, a fraction of a choice, to text someone for an out. But this was Jeremy you were talking about: the cute pale lanky boy with the hair that almost defied physics with its curl; ringlets that would make any mathematician jealous, the striped shirt wearing boy who had been only sweet before, and he was bound to be again—meaning he probably wouldn’t cancel last second like some assholes from school did, like the person next to you did, like you’d done to him. Yeah, this was Jeremy. He wasn’t you—shifting causing to break you from your thoughts, the arm that remained stoic around you acting as a prison chain, a firm reminder that you’d made a mistake, a symbol that portrayed that you didn’t deserve Jeremy; you were too broken, too heavy, too…you. A cut off for a scene happens, grey loading screen plaguing the screen.

It’s a second before you shift yourself, knowing you were already testing your own limits with your boyfriend. You pull out your phone, brightness turned completely down as 9:17 appeared, and underneath that, a text from the one boy you’d just been thinking about.

Jeremy: No rush, but I’m here! Let me know when you get here so that I can help you find me!

Opening your phone was risky, first degree murder worthy, but you knew you had to text him back, and the loading screen was the best time to do it, while everything around you was calm but you were burning with thousands on watts—energy rushing through your body. It was the only way that this was going to work. Plus, with the reply, maybe your boyfriend would think that it was just your mom; that he’d read the contact wrong.

(Y/N): Perfect! I just have to do something really fast and then I’ll be there!

Another stroke and your phone went black, locked, safe from peeping eyes. A second passed before you put on the mask that almost forms into your face, batting your eyes so they seemed brighter and full of something similar to affection. You lifted the corners of your mouth, attempting to appear innocent to the person who sat beside you, unmoving and still holding you to the leather chair that was now most likely about to showcase all of the nervous sweat that was running out of your body. With a tooth-showing smile to prevent suspicion, you pivoted your head to look at the boy beside you. “Hey, I think I have to go. My mom wants me home and I have to run an errand.”

He lets go slowly, retracting his hand as if the world were underwater for a second before moving that hand to your face, cupping it and bringing it closer to his. Your neck resisted for a bit, but he only pulled harder, body glued to the seat, unsure of the objects in the room now, unsure of the path, unsure of escape of this specific slutty action. His other hand now held yours, gripping it—stuck—forced into submitting to an action that you hadn’t wanted in months; left to deal with the turmoil and violation later. You’d forget what happened within the hour anyways: either claiming it was your fault, which is was, and dismissing it or just simply blocking it out of your memory.

Somewhat prepared for what this was about to be, he still did it anyways without asking, without warning, hand pulling your wrist into him and wrapping it around him, hand snaking its way to the back of your neck. Lips consumed yours, no mercy as an exchange happened. The will to pull away kept tugging at you, but with his hand digging into the back of your skull, escape wasn’t possible. The world begins to fades at the edges, every lie ever told becoming truth, making you believe even the most obscure as his mouth continued to move while you remained motionless—emotionless. Teeth come in contact with your lips, you still unsure of opening your mouth or leaving it a tight vacuum while he tries desperately to get what he wants. Numbness settles, a chant that you know too well forms in your head: don’t worry about it right now, this is what couples do, why do you feel violated, just keep going, just keep going, just keep going. The absence of light: complete darkness became your friend as he kept going, forcing harder and harder for your face to become one with his, cannibalistic actions being registered, only to be forgotten later.

He breaks the kiss at the sound of the next scene of the game playing, letting you go and leaving you choking on air that you’d forgotten to breathe as the kiss happened. With a second, he pauses the game and lets you stand, grabbing your things. You take note of the things around: game cases, old take out wrappers, empty cups, chargers. Bag now slung around you, jingling keys once again in your hand.

As soon as you were ready to make the home stretch, his hand reaches out and pulls you back, completely, catching you off guard in a kiss as his hands resume their place for just a split moment. Stuff behind you prevents backing up as you freeze, almost falling into his arms as he continues, the feeling of too much and spit all the way down to your chin, makeup there gone, showing something that was for your eyes only. His hands find their way onto your hips, moving downwards, slowly, almost teasing to some but torturous to you. Aggressive movements, pulling you into his body, wrapping you up in his twisted grip, darkness returned, no exhaling, no breathing, stay stuck, submit submit submit. This time there’s no choice to keep your jaw closed, forcing you closer, forcing your mouth open, air around you becoming soiled and heavy. It’s hard to breathe, so you just don’t, stuck in the place, arms acting like steel and holding you there; holding you accountable. Spit makes its way to your upper lip, and it takes all the strength in the world to not gag right there. More sweat forms, worries enter your mind as his hands now move lower and lower down your back, almost resting in a place that isn’t comfortable for exactly one person in this situation. You can feel your face pale, feeling the white walls collapsing in on you.

Finally, it breaks. Another moment, and he’s walking you to the exit, almost opening the wooden inside white door with the lock you’d heard click too many times. Violation makes its way through your body, seeping down from your lips and face all the way to your toes. Survival instincts are in full swing, eyes bright but not from love. You give him a smile, fluttering your eyelashes again, making this whole façade of a loving relationship more of a reality with every step, knowing that if you didn’t, that would be death: game over. He’s smiling in a similar way, but at this point, it’s hard to tell if he’s being genuine or if it’s a mimic of the one thing you can do well. His hand is still grasping yours, getting tighter as you two get closer and closer to the door with the brass knob, bathroom to the right with the grey washer and dryer, each front loading with baskets on top. How bad you envied that bathroom with the lock, the one you’d been in the last time you went to Jeremy’s. Fuck, you had to get out of here.

“Are you sure you have to go, babe?” his voice comes, pulling you out of your daydream of leaving, stricter, an edge to it, as if you had a choice and could say no; like it was your fault for having a mom that wanted you home—even though that had been a lie. His grip tightens, you’re sure that your hand is going to have marks on it at this point.

“Yeah. My mom needs me home soon, and I have to run an errand.”

He stops and doesn’t make eye contact until a moment before the world crashing sentence emerges from his mouth: “I saw it.”

And that’s it, everything cracks, breaking into a million pieces. He doesn’t need to be specific about what he saw, everything falling apart at the seams and turning into a complete chaos, storm running straight through this whatever the fuck you call it if it’s not a fucking trashy basement. You can feel your hands begin to shake, eyes looking at the window that looks into the kitchen, into freedom herself, praying that someone would be home this time. But of course, your luck had run out. The numbness that had been there vaguely throughout the night now exited and the rest was filled with the need to get out, but your body being too frozen to do so. Your lie had fallen through and he knew, but all you could do was attempt to be quiet, don’t disclose anything that could put you into more danger. Deny it, deny it, deny it.

“If you’re hanging out with someone else, go ahead. I guess you can go have fun with Jeremy.”

Lie, lie, lie. “He needs help with something.” It was a stretch, something that was just pulled from thin air, the air that kept thinning, breathing hard as the seconds once again dragged on, lagging into the next dimension, maybe one where this would end up okay and you could actually see Jeremy in the park tonight. The chances were getting slimmer with each second, and you knew that, but maybe, just maybe you could pull this off.

“So he’s your best friend, not me.”

“That’s not true,” and it wasn’t. Your best friend was a mutual friend of you two, the one who’d set you up. Jeremy was just someone who…you didn’t deserve. Moments still passed as if you were paper, wilting with each gust. “I love you.”

“I’m sure you do.”

Crumbling internally, this was the time to take a stand because if you didn’t, freedom would be farther from reach than it ever had been before. Physically, you kept composure, inside your stomach rolled. Your gut still telling you to run, you stood your ground no matter how much you felt the ground shake. “Look, I love you, okay?” Sweeter, dumbass. “I really do. I just need tonight to help him with something. You might be able to come too, if you want. Let me ask him.”

“No, it’s fine. I guess I’ll spend my night alone without you. I’d weigh you down if I went anyways.”

Shit. If you made a wrong move, this could be over. You weren’t sure how rash his decisions would be, police and ambulance had been there just weeks before after he’d been saying the same things. What was going to happen if you didn’t do anything about this? You had to do something; convince him that the statement wasn’t true—convince yourself that you really did want him there. That you loved him. “You wouldn’t, I just…he needs me there. I’m really sorry, I have to go, I’m supposed to meet him at—”

“You know, if you want to continue to side against me, go for it.”

Shock forced your heart to skip a beat, rapidly picking up with each passing millisecond that seemed to lag only minutes ago. “I’m not against you.” Your voice shook, you could hear it, shattering everything around you, legs, arms, hands, sweat, tears, tremors, shakes, all a recipe for what you could only assume was going to be disaster.

“Then why have you been talking to Jeremy more than me lately? Do I really mean less to you than him?”

“No! Why would he mean more to me than you?”

“Because you’re cheating on me with him.” Shit shit shit.

“I’m not, I promise.” It wasn’t cheating, at the very least you knew that. Everything had been carefully put, the sweater gone, this was just another gaslighting technique. He hadn’t caught the blue sweater that had been thrown under the seat. He was just making this up so you’d confess and say it was your fault. Exhale. It is your fault. Blinking quickly, trying to clear the clouds that seemed to surround you, diseased and causing you to hallucinate something that isn’t—couldn’t be true. You couldn’t be cheating on your boyfriend with Jeremy. Jeremy would have to like you first; he didn’t.

“I get it, I’m not good enough for you. But what really kills me is that I love you so much and I could’ve done the same thing with Chloe, but I didn’t.”

“I’m not cheating.” Your gut pulls away, vomit almost comes out. Every bone in your body is telling you to run, every single one has the urge, is tracing the steps, knows of the places you can go. Not the park, not Jeremy’s house, not Michael’s house. Putting them in danger would be too much for you—they’d already done so much…too much. No, this time you’d risk a motel or the 24 hour convenience store that was 15 minutes away with the barely lit parking lot because right now that was safer than the pale room and the light that almost seemed to give you a headache. Chills ran through you, fingers drumming onto the nearest surface that didn’t make noise; if they did, the assault would’ve started already. Or maybe not. That would be too nice, to put you out of your misery for once, not just waiting for something that you knew was inevitable. But then again, maybe it wasn’t. Maybe you’d be okay, just this once. Dismiss and move on, keep conversation going, you can do this, you can do this, you can do this.

“I doubt you ever really loved me.”

Another stab. Another thing that hurt without the physical punishment that at this point you wanted so that it could just be over with. So you could meet Jeremy if—fuck he didn’t leave already. Realization smacked you in the face. Everything that was said was true. No wonder you were hard to love. No wonder you spent hours panicking over one small mistake. No wonder all of your friends abandoned you because you stopped hanging out with them. You’re just as shitty as he says you are. So maybe you’re overreacting. Maybe things aren’t that bad. Maybe it’s you who’s crazy, and Jeremy’s just lying because he gets nervous. That, and you meant every word that came spewing from your mouth: “I do love you.”

“How am I supposed to believe that? You’re here making plans with Jeremy and leaving me all alone on our fucking date night.”

Stop stop stop shaking for once in your goddamn life. “We’re just friends.”

“Oh I’m sure just friends meet up in the middle of a park late at night.” He pauses, almost aware of how much that hurt, of the sting that came with it. Did friends do that? Did they really?! “Do you love me? Like genuinely?”

There’s another stop, this time your mind reeling, trying to find an excuse for this meet up other than the one you’d given, because he wasn’t buying that one obviously. You’re not sure how time is moving, to you, the world starting spinning exponentially faster, and yet, there’s part of you that’s calm. Acceptance. But the most of you wants to break down, screaming, trying to get away. That doesn’t matter. He’s waiting for a reason, taking in all the time you’re wasting, trying to come up with something. He’s already suspicious. It’s like this is just confirmation. But the very next thing, that needs to be said is that you do love him. An oath, a prayer, something to get you away for just half an hour, maybe more, and maybe safely this time. Your mouth opens, ready to react, but he beats you to the punch.

“All I’m saying is that I actually make time for you. All you do is work and hang out with Jeremy with his fucking sweater in your car, telling me you aren’t cheating and that you aren’t close with that lanky motherfucker. You can say he’s better than me. It’s not like I’m your boyfriend or anything.”

Nothing goes in, nothing comes out. Fingers have stopped drumming. Frozen, paralyzed, stuck in this sorry excuse for a moment, shaking still. Everything becomes blurry, almost black as the walls freeze over and chills come on now more than ever despite the usual New Jersey heat.

“Are you gonna fucking say anything?”

Fuck fuck fuck. Time ticks faster, unsure of what to do. He knows, oh fuck he knows. He saw the blue sweater, the way you hang out with him, the longing to just be gently touched and handled, to be treated like you matter, to be asked about consent, to be consistently cared for. Jeremy was just being a good friend, of course, but to you, those things meant the world. And now he knew. He knew.

“Whatever. I’m leaving.”

Fists clenched, he begins to walk out of the door, eyes blazing with something you’d only seen in private moments together, something that nobody else should see but you. And you knew exactly where he was going: straight to the lanky boy that gave you everything that he seemed to be lacking. You rip out of the trance, arms reaching out, grabbing him, desperately. Jeremy doesn’t deserve this, Jeremy is the only one who’s shown you respect in a way that you need it. It feels healthy, natural. He doesn’t deserve what you’d already seen. The only one who could ever deserve that was you. “Wait! We’re just friends! Nothing more! Why would I lie to you? Especially about this? I don’t love him. I love you!”

He’s almost out the door as he turns on his heel, walking back into a room with a stampeding footstep. Closer and closer, each moment he inches towards you is another flinch, getting bigger and bigger each time. Your face beings to ache as the agony of waiting for it burns itself into your memory, all hope is lost. You aren’t getting out of this alive.

He stops. Maybe you will. He seems to be calmer than before, breath evening out and his eyes have rage exit them. You lean forward, guard down to grab your stuff before you hit the ground, a familiar sting brought up onto your face. He steps back around, pacing. He knows it’s wrong, you both do. But it’s your fault, it’s your fault, it’s your—“Just friends?! After you defended that asshole?”

No thoughts come into your head, it’s just a reflex, try and get to the door, try and get to the door: “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, we’re just friends, okay?”

“Whatever.” He steps away—maybe that’s it. Shock keeps you on the ground, slowly getting your bearings.

It doesn’t matter—he’s infinitely faster than you. Nothing is said as his hands wrap around you neck, similar to how they wrap around the controller when he’s frustrated. It’s a common assault, but with the air depleting, there’s no time for extra thoughts. You kick, trying, praying, that he’ll drop you soon. Black clouds the corners of your eyes, blissful sleep coming soon—maybe you won’t feel the fall onto the ground.

Your body crumples against the ground, gravity never gaining an inch of forgiveness. You’re sputtering and coughing, eyes tearing up, knowing how bad that scar is going to be later. Now everything is brighter, you aren’t more awake, but better prepared to leave. With a clumsy attempt to stand up, gripping his black leather chair, you attempt to grab your stuff again—even just the keys will do enough damage so you can leave. It’s almost upsetting how fast he is, pushing you back onto the ground, arm of the chair digging into your ribs and nearly knocking more wind out of you. The world fades from grey, everything feels wrong, there’s something wrong, get to the back doors, run.

There’s a second that you realize you’re on the ground, not upright, meaning you could at least prepare for what comes next. A swift kick to the back, and you can feel his foot hit your spine. The feeling of paralysis plagues your mind as more oxygen makes its way back up. Two more kicks, little bites, little moments of absolute pain. But it’ll be over soon. This is always the final blow, the grand finale for him; the final smash—you’re sure Jeremy would call it that.

Jeremy comes into mind, your guard being let down. It’s always easier during these moments to think of better times, better people, better situations. You can practically picture Ford’s Park, that he’s sitting there, nothing special, ready to point out the stars like Mae and Angus do in Night in the Woods. You’re sure that that’s what it was going to be.

But thinking of Jeremy was a mistake, your tension that was keeping you awake and alive now gone. Your body rolls with a particularly sharp kick, the next one hitting your ribs, causing more air to escape you. There’s isn’t much time, you know, you know, you know things are only going to get worse if you don’t run now, bruising you’re sure is already happening blossoming like infection, spreading and taking over; one kick, one punch, one grab, one death march is another, another, another, another.

Now is the time to escape, though. The moment can’t be planned better, you’re already on your stomach, making crawling away easy, and almost intentional. Maybe Jeremy would be your saving grace this time, maybe this would be okay. Maybe he would be the sole reason you lived to see another day. He wasn’t a scapegoat, he wasn’t what everyone said he was, he exactly what you needed, and holy fuck, so much more.

Everything moves in slow motion, the light on the wall, usually mounted, is spinning with the rest of the room, plaid curtains now reaching the perimeter of your vision, black finally fading as you attempt to not trip over his sisters things. The movement needs to be fast, milliseconds, even. You plan your route in your head, check your line, noting exactly where to go and what to do when you get out. Call Jeremy, go to a hotel, tell him to meet you there but check in at the front desk. You’ll be there as unlisted and pay for dinner or whatever the fuck else he wants. He is the one that got you out of this situation, of course.

You get two footsteps into that plan, the finishing touches still blurry as a hand grabs your wrist, already feeling the bruising tainting the flesh as you face his eyes one more time. Hazel strikes you—the last thing you see before he throws you against the wall. Something is yelled, but the world is spinning and your vision is blackening, the world becoming as black as it does when you kiss. The last thing that’s in your vision is the vent on the ceiling, so close to escape, so close to the plaid curtains, the double doors that lead out into the countryside. Even with the coyotes, it’s a much safer place than inside. Jeremy plagues your mind for a second, but the hazel eyes you’d just seen come back into view. It’s your fault. You don’t deserve him.

The very last thing you hear is a glass smashing against the wall, feeling small cuts graze your skin, threading the needle into darkness.

#Part 15 Supplement #200 Followers Reward

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gvbejvmes · 5 years

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Drabble: Thinking Without Speaking

Title: Thinking Without Speaking Rating: PG-13 Relationships: Gabe/Johnny, Gabe/Jill Brief Summary: Asking for help was never a strong suit of his. Warnings: Internalized biphobia

Five Years Ago

"What the hell are you talking about?" Gabriel asked as he moved about the front office of Seeing Eye Investigations. "I don't need a secretary. I'm managing things very well, thank you." He told his cousin, Dusty, who raised an eyebrow at the stack of files piled onto the desk he used when he helped Gabriel out with cases. "Okay, don't look at those. I just hadn't gotten around to it yet, but it's fine. It's fine. Johnny has been helping me with filing when I'm overwhelmed, and he's been helping me weed out weirdos when we're up late watching TV. I'm doing fine."

There was a sigh and his cousin grabbed him by the shoulders, stilling him instantly. It wasn't like Gabriel meant to flit around like a bird when he was nervous or didn't like the way a conversation was going; it was just something that happened. "C'mon, man. We both know that's not true. You need the help. You don't trust people. I get that, I do. There's stuff from New Mexico that you still don't want to tell me, but things are different here. I'm not going to refer someone to you I don't trust." Dusty sighed again. "Besides, she needs a job just as much as you need the help. Just meet her, okay? And if you don't hit it off, I won't bug you about needing additional help around here, okay?"

This was awkward. This was abso-fvcking-lutely awkward. Gabriel didn't know how to interview anyone, and this woman, Jillynn, definitely didn't know how to be interviewed if he monologue was anything to go by. "Dustin said you were looking for a secretary here at the office. Which, to be honest I have no skills in that field but when i put my mind to something I make sure that I do it well. Also, just so we are clear I will not be wearing slutty outfits or flaunting my boobs at you for any reason at all."

Gabriel frowned, and tilted his head to the side as he stared at this hot (hot? where the fvck did that thought come from) dyed blonde chick who was sassing him. There were so many things he could have said to that little ramble, but what came out of his mouth instead was: "I'm gay?" And why the fvck did that come out as a question. It shouldn't have been a question. It should have been a statement. He'd been out of the closet for TEN years. Why was he questioning his homosexuality now?

"You’re gay?" And the woman, Jillynn, looked very confused, but she also looked like something else... Was she disappointed that he was gay? She looked disappointed that he was gay.

Awkwardly, he swallowed, in lieu of being able to think of anything else to say. He lit a cigarette, and inhaled deeply before he trusted himself to say anything else. "Yeah. I'm gay?" And fvck, why did it come out like a question again? It wasn't supposed to be a question! "This is my boyfriend, Johnny." He showed her the framed picture of himself and a dirty-blonde man with slightly curling hair wearing a v-necked shirt.

She looked at the picture for a moment before looking back at Gabriel. "Why do you keep making it sound like a question?" He felt like she wanted to ask him something else entirely, but that she just didn't.

"I have NO idea!"

And it was true. This was all very new for him, but he found that he kept staring at her, and that his gaze kept dropping to the cleavage. What the fvck was that about? He'd barely looked at his wife's chest and he'd slept with her enough to have two, society dictated, children. "My voice has never done that before!" He'd never said one thing, but had his voice betray him like that before.

"Asked a question?"

And great, she was also a sarcastic a$$hole. "Questioned something that was supposed to be a statement." He said instead as he stamped out his cigarette and then scrubbed his hands over his face.

The atmosphere of the room went a little awkward again. He didn't know what to say, but apparently Jillynn did because the next words out of her mouth were: "Are you saying I have the job, or you just going to let me stand here until you call the cops? I mean come on, the only thing I am not willing to do is call you Daddy. That's a hard no for me. Dustin said you had to say yes.”

"Don't worry. I already have someone in my life who I call Daddy." Laughing, Gabriel shook his head. "That's not what he told me, but that wouldn't surprise me either." He took a deep breath and waved a hand in the air, as though granting her a job. "You know what, what's the worst that could happen? You're hired."

The upbeat strains of Depeche Mode echoed through the apartment as Gabriel moved about the kitchen, working on dinner. "What is this?" Johnny asked with a laugh as he came up behind Gabriel and wrapped his arms around his waist. "You're listening to something other than the Smiths?" Laughing, he placed a hand on Gabriel's forehead. "Are you ill?"

Rolling his eyes, Gabriel wiggled his way out of his boyfriend's grasp and moved to pull something out of the oven instead. "It could have been the Beatles. I was listening to Sgt Pepper last week and you were surprised then, too." He leaned over and pecked Johnny on the cheek. "I had a good day is all. I met a girl today."

Johnny raised an eyebrow at the statement, but was more focused on trying to steal one of the cookies he'd bought from the bakery down the street. "Okay, okay." Johnny laughed again when Gabriel batted his hand away. "You meet lots of girls."

Gabriel sighed in frustration. He didn't know how to describe it. He just felt like... something had happened today - something important. "No, I met a girl, Well, a woman, but someone significant." Suddenly, Johnny didn't look amused any more. "You are aware that you’re telling your boyfriend this, right, Briel?" He asked, arms crossed and an eyebrow raised.

"Johnny," Gabriel whined out, grabbing him and kissing him hard. "I tell you everything. I just wanted you to know that I met someone today who I think is going to make me happy." The other man still didn't look convinced, but he sagged against Gabriel, and kissed the corner of his mouth. "Fine, where did you meet this Wonder Woman of yours?" He drawled out, working his hand behind Gabriel to try and grab a cookie again. Without thinking about it, he told Johnny the truth. "Oh, I hired her today."

Johnny went very still and the only sound in the kitchen was Personal Jesus and the sound of a cookie falling back onto the counter.

Three Years Ago

The devil will find work for idle hands to do. I stole and I lied, and why? Because you asked me to. But now you make me feel so ashamed because I've only got two hands. Well, I'm still fond of you.

Morrissey's voice echoed through the open window to the office. Gabriel had been chain smoking for the past hour as he worked on the books. This was the last place in the world he wanted to be, but he couldn't stay in the house right now so he and George II were staying in the office. Johnny was still there, and Charlie was living in the dorms at Julliard. Even though Johnny had broken up with him, Gabe knew that if he stayed at the house, they’d wind up back together. In the past that’s what he would have wanted, but now he wasn’t sure if that was something he wanted any more.

Outside the office he could hear Jillynn and Dusty starting to approach, followed by Dustin's voice. "Oh, sh!t. You didn't tell me that Gabe and Johnny broke up." The song shifted to I Know It's Over. "Yeah, if he's still on the Smiths part of his mourning, I'm not going in there. Call me when he switches to 80's pop or Vampire Weekend of something. Good luck."

He could hear Dustin all but running down the stairs. Rolling his eyes, Gabriel didn't move from where he was crunching numbers. When Jill came into the office, Gabriel blew smoke in her direction. "I'm not as broken up about it as he thinks I am." He said, taking a gulp of his tea. "No booze in any of my hot beverages, I promise."

The music stopped for a minute before switching to something more upbeat and poppy. "You didn't tell me that you broke up with Johnny." There was something in Jill's tone of voice that made Gabriel think she wanted to say something more, but was holding back.

Putting his cigarette out, he rolled his mug between the palms of his hands. "He broke up with me." Gabriel corrected before finishing his cup of tea and moving towards the kitchenette to put his mug in the sink. "He didn't think my heart was in it any more. He was probably right."

Jill had gone very still, and she turned as Gabriel walked back into the room. "Your heart wasn't in the relationship?" She questioned, and again Gabriel couldn't help but to think that she wasn't saying something that she wanted to say.

"He thought my heart was somewhere else." Gabriel stopped in front of her, and tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "I have no idea where he would have gotten that idea from." He breathed out, realizing that he was standing way too close to her. "Do you?" Before he could talk himself out of it, he leaned in to kiss her and that was when George started to bark from the back room.

A blush worked it's way across Gabriel's features as he went into the back. He could have sworn he heard a soft, "No idea what would make him think that."

When he went back out into the main room, Jill was gone, the change in music the only thing to prove that he hadn't hallucinated the entire interaction.

#Drabble #pairing: Gabe/Jill #pairing: Gabe/Johnny

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