#with a tortoise censor

[atlasllm]

jesus fucking christ the roald dahl children's book censorship is the dumbest shit ever

ITS A FUCKING TRACTOR

#atlas speaks; #they truly are censoring the dumbest shit here #esio trot too?? the one about a lonely man buying a bunch of tortoises??? #THEY CENSORED THE EXPLODING DOG IN GEORGE'S MARVELLOUS MEDICINE?? #THE BOOK ABOUT HUGE EXAGGERATION??? #they're children's books from Another Time ofc theyre gonna have problematic shit!!! #why hide that??? there is no racism in ba sing se??? motherfucker???

[fennecfics-the-simp-king]

Cuphead Show! King Dice & Devil x Reader preferences (romantic):

Heyyyy I’m gonna be posting more x Reader stuff here. Also some words are censored because Tumblr is a meanie and won’t let me swear in my fanfiction-

The gender for (Y/n) is vague, but it does have menstrual cycle preferences mixed in, along with some talk about these two respecting pronouns and that jazz so, yeah.

Hope it’s a fun read, I might post more of these guys.

Being in a (romantic) relationship with The Devil would include:

• It’s actually hard for him to fall in love or even trust others, so it’ll take a while for him to say “I love you”.

• Though the first time he’ll ever say “I love you” (most likely after a few months of you two dating) it is immediately followed by a scrunch of the face and him going. “That was… strange..” 

• He forces you to live in Hell with him, and only lets you visit Earth on special occasions. Family stuff, friends, but other than that YOU’RE STAYING!!

• He’s so dramatic whenever he has to cut his nails. He’ll run away from you, or hide. Once, while trying to find him to cut his nails, you found him on the ceiling.

• Despite hating his nails being cut, he will literally beg you to paint his nails. He won't just do one color though, he likes to change it up a bit. Sometimes he'll ask for grey, gold, red, but he loves the black nail polish!

• Whenever he has to do stuff that he doesn’t want to do, he tries to argue that he’s the devil and because of that, you can’t tell him what to do.

• One of his favorite activities is burning bibles, so...you have to deal with being woken up to the smell of smoke at 3AM.

• He's still not fond with current technology, but he does seem to enjoy Netflix.

• Devil giving you weird pet names: Darlin', succub!tch, shmoopie, baby-cakes, cow-pie, and tortoise-pigeon (Being the main nickname).

• If you ever need to practice your makeup on someone, Devil won't mind. He likes how it makes him look.

• Surprisingly enough, this guy brushes his teeth regularly. He got them pearly whites. That, and he doesn't want to loose his sharp teeth, they're his favorite, apparently they make him look intimidating.

• Devil is a man of art, very therapeutic for him. He loves to paint, sometimes he’ll want you to pose for him. And he's actually quite quick when it comes to painting.

• Both you and Henchmen helping him whenever he basically gets electrocuted by the sweater. The two of you are practically the only people he trusts, with Dice being the third.

• He doesn't care what gender you are, or if you're trans. If you're still you, and if you're not lying about anything, he won't care. Along with that he also doesn’t KNOW anything about that stuff, so you probably gotta help if you want him to understand.

• Even though he's the devil, he would never want you to feel bad about yourself. He loves you unconditionally, he would kill anyone who makes you feel that way, steal their soul, eat it, then spit it back out ‘cause it’s clearly rotten!

• If you go through the menstrual cycle and are having bad cramps, he gets very…awkward. He’s not very affectionate with others so he has no idea how to comfort people. He’ll most likely just have some of his little demons looking after you for a few days.

• He tries to use correct pronouns, he mostly slips up though, and he won't realize. You just have to be there to correct him for him to actually notice.

Random example:

(He's showing you to someone)

"Yeah, she's really adorable, isn't she?"

"It's 'they'.”

"...AHHH!" *frustrated demon noises*

• He’s not frustrated at you or the fact you use different pronouns, he’s frustrated at himself for not doing it right. So don’t worry.

Being in a relationship with King Dice would include:

• Probably says “I love you” way too fast, and by that I mean on the first date. 

• If you wear makeup he’ll experiment with it whenever you’re asleep. (The masculine urge to wear your partner’s makeup)

• One of his favorite parts of your body happens to be your hands. He loves how perfectly they fit into his. Sometimes he’ll preform a type of show using his hand and your hand as the actors.

• If you go sit in the audience him during Roll The Dice. He'll immediately see you in the crowd and blush for the rest of the show.

• When he knows you're in the audience, he'll say this while announcing to everyone: "Ladies and gentlemen! ..and (Y/n).." (he'll whisper your name under his breath, but loud enough for the microphone to pick it up.)

• King Dice ALSO giving you some (semi)weird pet names: Darling, fuzzy dice, you adorable gambler, my wild card, little poker, and pumpkin.

• The personification of drama. 

• Has a lot of gossip and info on the other famous people of Inkwell. Will tell you this gossip. You will listen. You have no choice-

• This man may seem like he knows how to do shit on his own, but he actually needs help with most things. Such as you having to help with this man's bow-tie every morning, because he just cannot figure it out for the life of him.

• Perfectionist, such a damn perfectionist. He won't go on with his day without him looking perfectly chipper, and he also spends hours in the shower. Really making sure to run up those water bills.

• A little sensitive about his age. If you ask him about it, he’ll say "that's not important" which is an oddly a creepy answer-

• If you wake up early, you'll find Dice in the bathroom just looking at himself in the mirror with a blank stare. If you actually enter the bathroom, he'll be so terrified that he jumps INTO the shower and closes the curtain to hide himself.

• He's mostly insecure about his pips, or dots. He knows he's getting old, because his color is fading. So...he buys lipstick to cover the faded coloring. But you smudged it once while he was kissing you, and he reacted like he was dying.

• He fiddles with his mustache when he's nervous and yet hates if tell him it makes him look like a villain.

• Much like his boss, if you go through the menstrual cycle he gets ungracefully awkward. But he tries to be very casual about it, despite his awkwardness being obvious as hell.

• “Oh, it’s that week?” Silent for a second. “Do you need me to get you anything or ..no?”

• Will buy you everything you need. And since stuff like tampons were fairly new in the 1930s and therefore most likely a tad expensive, thankfully he does have the money for it.

• If reminded, will carry some on him for you. If reminded that is, I’m putting emphasis on “IF REMINDED” for a f—king reason! Guy’s on autopilot all day, he’s famous but also has pretty much everything done for him, and so he doesn’t have to think about much.

• If not reminded he will completely forget and therefore freak the hell out if asked if for some.

• Like The Devil, he has no idea what being Non-binary means, or Bisexual, or anything related to that. I’m not saying he’s straight….He’s not, he just doesn’t know there are words for stuff like that other than ‘homosexual’ and a few other words I can’t mention-

• So, he'll mess up a few times when trying to use the correct pronouns, except he'll correct himself very VERY quickly. 

• "He- THEY.. are my partner. I said they, of course I did. I would never say anything other than they.” Silence for a few seconds before then saying in a much more serious tone: “I said they.”

• He cares. He’s just stupid/j

#cuphead show x reader #the cuphead show #the devil x reader #king dice x reader #cuphead devil #fennecfics #gn!reader #gn!y/n #the devil cuphead #x reader #fanfiction

[royalsealy]

Another coord for the cherry blossoms 🌸

ID under readmore

[Image Description: Two images of Royalsealy. In the top image, Royalsealy stands center on top of field of green moss and grass covered in cherry blossoms. Above him, the branches of a double cherry blossom tree climb upward and out of view, with their pink blossoms serving as the background to Royalsealy. Royalsealy is wearing a red JSK layered on top of a pink long sleeve round collar blouse, he has long brown hair with blond under peaking out. He has a pink headdress with white cloth usakumya ears with red bows clipped on. One hand holds the white strap of a rabbit plush bag across his chest, while the other is by his side holding a dark brown rectangular bag. His legs as positioned as if he is walking towards the camera, with pink over the knee socks that have red tea cups and biscuits nearby. He is wearing dark brown cross-strap shoes that have a chunky heel.

In the second photo, Royalsealy is wearing the same outfit and in the same location, except this time he is laying on the ground with one arm propping himself up and the other resting on the skirt of his dress. The skirt has white lace details, including a row of horizontal white lace roses.

In both images, his nose and mouth have been censored with a clip of the cherry blossoms. He is wearing pink and black tortoise shell pattern cat-eye shaped glasses. He has various rose and tea cup related rings and accessories. End ID].

#i need to run a stitch through those ribbons theyre slippery #btssb #baby the stars shine bright #lolita fashion #egl #egl fashion #egl community #lolita community #alt fashion #jfashion #sakura #cherry blossoms #spring outfit #rosyalley #rosy alley #sweet lolita #old school style coord

[a-shoebox-named-meap]

a guide to people’s names, titles, and other forms of address in cang lan jue/love between fairy and devil

so for chinese media, i like knowing how to read and pronounce the characters’ names, but when trying to look up the names of the clj/lbfad people, i found the info i wanted rather hard to find. i wanted to know what characters made up their names! how to pronounce them! what their different titles and nicknames meant and what kind of people address them by those names! so i decided to try compiling this info myself, on a whim. it’s taken a HOT minute, and a Lot of scrubbing through the episodes, and it will probably need to be updated and edited as i go about rewatching the show (and improving my chinese :’) aha) but here’s what i got for now! feel free to message me if you have suggestions, edits, corrections, or requests :) hopefully some people find this helpful or interesting – i know some of the things i’ve included here are lost in translation in netflix’s english subtitles.

disclaimer of sorts: for definitions, i used MDBG (mdbg.net) and the Pleco app. also, i’m a native english speaker who’s been learning chinese for a handful of years; my chinese is so-so and i tend to miss things like Connotations™. i’ve watched the show 1.5 times and read 1 page of the book. i did my best :P again, open to suggestions! please be sure to check this source post for the most updated version, as i imagine i’ll be making edits now and again.

this is in no particular order. for each person, i put their official/most commonly used name at the top, then in bullets beneath that i’ve listed definitions for the individual characters in their name, along with any other titles or nicknames that they have been called in the show. any somewhat extraneous information is in italics.

苍兰诀 Cāng Lán Jué

the title of the show and the original novel; 苍 (cāng) refers to Dongfang Qingcang, 兰 (lán) refers to Xiao Lanhua, and 诀 (jué) means “farewell.” i’ve seen some people translate this as the Parting of the Fairy and Devil. (i discovered this halfway through watching the show and it made me SO nervous for how the show would end)

九鹭非香 (Jiǔ Lù Fēi Xiāng) is the author’s name/pseudonym.

东方青苍 Dōngfāng Qīngcāng

character breakdown: 东方 (dōngfāng) = east, eastern. 青 (qīng) = green, sometimes blue or black (or blue-green), young/youth. 苍 (cāng) = dark blue, deep green, ash-gray.

my hypothesized derivation of his name: while i was researching the Black Tortoise (玄武 Xuánwǔ) for this post, I Discovered Something Rather Important. there are four mythological creatures that symbolize the chinese constellations and four cardinal directions. besides the Black Tortoise, there are the White Tiger (白虎 Báihǔ), Vermillion Bird (朱雀 Zhūquè), and the Azure Dragon (青龙 Qīnglóng). the Azure Dragon represents the east. so get this: its epithet is the Azure Dragon of the East. in chinese it is called 东方青龙 (Dōngfāng Qīnglóng) or 东方苍龙 (Dōngfāng Cānglóng). SOUND FAMILIAR?? ISN’T THAT COOL?? i just think that is so cool. yes, the characters are the same as in Dongfang Qingcang’s name. associated with the Azure Dragon are: East (direction), Spring (season), Dawn (time of day), Blue/green (color), and Wood (chinese element). my mind imploded when i discovered this, have a good day.

大魔头 dà mótóu: (used in the book, changed to “da mutou” in the show for reasons? some folks mentioned they might have been censoring “mo”) lit. translates to big devil head/boss/chief, big demon boss

大木头 dà mùtóu: (phonetically similar to da motou, changed to this in the show for Reasons™) lit. big wooden head, big wooden chief/boss, or big log. it can also be translated as big blockhead, as per the netflix engsubs, but it’s not my personal preference — the connotations and intent between “da mutou” and “Big Blockhead” feel very different to me. (i.e., if you’re writing dialogue in a fic, i would recommend Da Mutou over Big Blockhead.) Xiao Lanhua calls him this, saying that it sounds a bit less serious than other, more formal forms of address for him.

东方强 Dōngfāng Qiáng, 大强 Dà Qiáng: the name and familiar nickname Xiao Lanhua calls him in the early days before she knew his identity, after she misheard him saying his actual name; 大 (dà) = big, 强 (qiáng) = strong, powerful

本座 běnzuò: a term used to refer to oneself, like “i/me,” but specifically if that person is very high-ranking; your average person wouldn’t use this word. (the usual word for i/me is 我 wǒ. near the end of the show Dongfang Qingcang transitions to using 我 wǒ with Xiao Lanhua — it’s a notable switch that gets lost in translation! similarly, he also makes the switch during his heated tirade at his father in ep. 18, and switches back to his usual 本座 (běnzuò) after he momentarily collects himself. i could be wrong, but i think he drops the 本座 (běnzuò) when less formality or authority is required or desired, like when Things Get Personal, or when he’s stepping out of his role as Moon Supreme, so to speak.)

尊上 zūnshàng: “my lord,” by far the most common term used to address and refer to Dongfang Qingcang by a majority of characters who aren’t his enemy. also part of the phrase often used to formally greet Dongfang Qingcang, “拜见尊上!” (bàijiàn zūnshàng) “Greetings, my lord!”

月尊 yuèzūn: Moon Supreme, used to refer to Dongfang Qingcang or this position (as in the throne, the seat of the Moon Supreme, the name of this Job) respectfully

月尊大人 yuèzūn dàren: Moon Supreme Lord (netflix); 大人 (dàren) is a title of respect towards one’s superior. this title is often used to address Dongfang Qingcang directly. Xiao Lanhua uses it regularly when she is being kept in the Moon Palace, both in private conversation and in serious public settings. (as the show goes on, she switches to 大木头 (dà mùtóu) in their more private, casual conversations but maintains 月尊大人 (yuèzūn dàren) in situations that warrant greater respect and formality.)

魔尊 mózūn: devil king, demon king; used in the book to address him at times (by Lady Chidi for instance, who in the show calls him 月尊 (yuèzūn), Moon Supreme; were they trying to avoid the word 魔 mó in the show or something, i don’t know)

儿子 érzi, 孩子 háizi: “son/my son” and “child/my child,” respectively. used briefly by Dongfang Qingcang’s father to address his son directly. the other times, he calls him Qingcang.

兄尊 xiōngzūn: a specific form of “brother”; the word that Xunfeng uses to address and refer to Dongfang Qingcang. 兄 (xiōng) = older brother (i.e., only a younger sibling would use this term), 尊 (zūn) = a respectful honorific often appended to these titles, usually signifying high, venerated status. 尊 (zūn) comes up a lot :)

for those who are curious about the reverse: Dongfang Qingcang usually addresses Xunfeng by name. when Dongfang Qingcang refers to Xunfeng with a familial term in ep. 2, he says “我那弟弟,” my younger brother (possibly translated as “that younger brother of mine”). for “younger brother” he uses 弟弟 dìdi, there’s no 尊 (zūn) or other honorific — probably because his younger brother is lower than him in status, so there is no need for an honorific. (it’s also interesting to see that he dropped the 本座 (běnzuò) for this line and used 我 (wǒ), but i’m not sure yet if this implies anything, if it might be a mistake, or if it just sounds more natural. in ep. 10, Dongfang Qingcang calls Xunfeng “本座的同胞弟弟,” “my younger brother (borne of the same parents),” where he does use běnzuò to refer to himself, but this line is a bit sarcastic in tone.)

both Dongfang Qingcang and Xunfeng refer to and address their father with 父尊 fùzūn, which is father + honorific, similar to 兄尊 (xiōngzūn). others usually call their father the previous/former/old Moon Supreme, 老月尊 lǎo yuèzūn. (extra note: Dongfang Qingcang doesn’t use 父尊 (fūzūn) in every case where he is referring to his father — on a rare few occasions he uses the more generic term 父亲 (fùqīn) — but based on my Research and consulting a few people with better chinese than me, this may be because of the way the word “father” is used in the sentence. more of a grammar/syntax thing than something significant to the plot or his character.)

a neat thing that happened in ep. 21, around timestamp 38:15: Dongfang Qingcang accidentally uses 父尊 (fùzūn) when talking about his father to Xiao Run in the mortal realm, which might have implied to Xiao Run that his father is of very high, emperor-like status (very sus, for an undercover agent); however, he catches himself, and switches to 父亲 fùqīn, which is the more common term for “father.” in the engsubs it just looks like he’s stuttering over the word “father.” 父亲 (fùqīn) is also used in modern day to refer to one’s father, but it’s a bit formal and usually used in conversation with other people or in writing; you wouldn’t use this term to address your dad directly, that’s 爸爸 bàba. in case any modern AU fic writers were wondering ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

少尊 shàozūn: Young Lord. used to address Dongfang Qingcang when he was a boy, when his father was still the Moon Supreme.

属下 shǔxià: subordinate. used to refer to himself (in 3rd person) when speaking to Xiyun, when he was acting as her servant after her rebirth. (this term is also used by Shangque with Dongfang Qingcang.)

小仙 xiǎoxiān: lit. little immortal, perhaps translated as low/lower immortal. this isn’t so much a title as a description of his position, when he is pretending to be from Shuiyuntian in front of Xiyun. this scene helped me understand how the word 仙 (xiān) works, actually. Dongfang Qingcang called himself a 小仙 (xiǎoxiān) of Shuiyuntian, to which Xiyun later said, “你身上没有仙气。根本不是仙族。” netflix engsubs wrote, “You have no immortal aura on you. You are not immortal.” and then i thought to myself, but he is immortal though, isn’t he? but 仙 (xiān), meaning “immortal” or “celestial being,” refers more to the race of people in Shuiyuntian rather than the state of immortality. immortal the noun, not immortal the adjective. Xiyun isn’t saying, “you are not an undying entity,” (because he is); what she really means is, “you are not of the fairy realm/tribe.” 仙族 (xiānzú), the term she uses in this sentence, means fairy tribe or immortal realm, referring to Shuiyuntian.

东方员外 Dōngfāng yuánwài: translated as “Mr. Dongfang” by netflix. this is the mortal title Jieli assigned to him, and how he is usually addressed during the mortal realm arc. 员外 (yuáiwài) is an old word meaning “counselor” or “landlord.” Jieli intended for him to be a wealthy businessman. when he is just addressed as 员外 (yuánwài), it is translated to “sir.”

东方兄 Dōngfāng-xiōng: 兄 (xiōng) refers to one’s older brother; this is a familiar term Xiao Run uses to address Dongfang Qingcang when they become Bros™

内兄 (nèixiōng): brother-in-law, wife’s elder brother. Xiao Run calls Dongfang Qingcang this, after Jieli announces that Xiao Lanhua is Dongfang Qingcang’s sister.

郎君 lángjūn: translated by netflix as “young man” and “sir.” it is also an archaic form of addressing one’s husband, and could refer to the playboy of a rich family. however, i think in this show it is a respectful form of address, possibly directed at the head of a household unit (Xiao Run’s father and occasionally Xiao Run himself are referred to with the same term). i’m unsure though.

小兰花 Xiǎo Lánhuā (Orchid)

character breakdown: 小 (xiǎo) = little/small, but commonly used in front of names and nicknames for ... reasons i am too lazy to explain here, but other people have definitely written about it if you’d like to look it up. 兰花 (lánhuā) = orchid.

小花妖 Xiǎo Huāyāo: lit. little flower demon, little flower monster; the name that Dongfang Qingcang initially calls Xiao Lanhua, when he still doesn’t like her. netflix subs say “little flower spirit,” but to me this phrase loses a bit of the evil/demon/monster connotation — i feel like Xiao Huayao is not meant to be particularly respectful or polite :’) interestingly, i noticed in ep. 10 that Shangque calls her 小花妖 (Xiǎo Huāyāo) to her face, perhaps because she was annoying him, but he calls her Xiao Lanhua (Orchid) in his private conversation with Dongfang Qingcang shortly after. forms of address really have so many potential implications…

兰花仙子 Lánhuā xiānzi: Fairy Orchid; she is sometimes addressed as just 仙子 (xiānzi), “fairy,” including in situations where her name is not known by the speaker

仙族女人 Xiānzú nǚrén: Fairy Tribe woman (used by some Moon Tribe people to address her in third person, not when speaking to her directly)

月主 yuèzhǔ: translated as Moon Queen; zhǔ on its own means host, owner, or master. this is how people of the Moon Tribe address Xiao Lanhua after she undergoes her trip to Non-Abidance Cave to marry Dongfang Qingcang.

息芸 Xīyún: her name as the goddess. 息 (xī) = breath, or to cease/stop/rest; 芸 (yún) mainly refers to the plant Ruta graveolens, the common rue, as far as i can tell

息山神女 Xīshān shénnǚ: Goddess of Xishan; 山 (shān) = mountain

息兰(族的)神女 Xīlán (zú de) shénnǚ: Xilan Goddess (without parentheses) or Goddess of the Xilan Tribe (with parentheses, used by Xiao Lanhua at one point to refer to herself). Goddess of Xishan is the more common title, compared to Xilan Goddess, but both have been used.

breakdown of previous: 息兰 (xīlán) = the name of the tribe, containing the words for “breath” and “orchid”; 族 (zú) = the word for tribe, clan, race, nationality, ethnicity, etc.; 的 (de) is a possessive particle; 神女 (shénnǚ) = goddess (lit. god-woman; it’s also slang for “prostitute” but that doesn’t come up in this show)

故人 gùrén: old friend (literary); how the Xuanwu god addresses Xiao Lanhua/Xiyun. (this word is also used to refer to the deceased/departed, but not in this context.)

when referring to Xiao Lanhua’s plant form, people in the show use (小) 兰花草, (xiǎo) lánhuā cǎo. 草 (cǎo) = grass. it means (little) orchid plant. not every mention includes the “little.”

her familial relationship to Xunfeng: in ep. 28 Dongfang Qingcang says, “If you still regard me as your brother, then she is your sister-in-law.” 她就是你的阿嫂。阿嫂 (ā-sǎo) is an archaic term for sister-in-law, specifically for one’s older brother’s wife. if Dongfang Qingcang and Xiao Lanhua were married, Xunfeng might call her this, but this never happens in the show. Xie Wanqing, similarly, also refers to Xiao Lanhua as her future 阿嫂 (ā-sǎo). in a modern AU, Xunfeng would call his sister-in-law either 嫂子 (sǎozi) or 大嫂 (dàsǎo). my mom is a native speaker and says the latter is more likely. it refers to the oldest brother’s wife, the “big” sister-in-law, even if she is younger than the speaker.

on that note, the word for “wife” is 妻子 (qīzi), and it’s sometimes used in the show when referring to Xiao Lanhua per her relationship to Dongfang Qingcang. Dongfang Qingcang himself often uses 月主 (yuèzhǔ), Moon Queen, in lieu of “wife.” a couple exceptions: when he’s pretending Xiao Lanhua is his wife to trick Xiao Run, the word he uses for “wife” is 内子 (nèizǐ). when he’s speaking to Changheng in his dream state, he does use 妻子 (qīzi) to refer to her as his wife.

兰花娘子 Lánhuā niángzǐ: Lady Orchid. commonly used to address Xiao Lanhua in the mortal realm. 娘子 (niángzǐ) is a polite form of address for a young woman, at least in Ye Olde Days™; it can also be used to address one’s wife, which Dongfang Qingcang does when he’s pretending that Xiao Lanhua is his wife to trick Xiao Run. there, 娘子 (niángzǐ) is translated as “honey.”

女侠 nǚxiá: heroine, lit. woman-hero; 侠 (xiá) can mean chivalrous, brave, heroic. this is how Xiao Run calls her when he first meets her, thinking she’s The One.

画中仙 (子) huàzhōng xiān(zi): fairy in the painting. Xiao Run calls her this early on after meeting her, and whenever he refers to the fairy in his dreams.

月尊副将 觞阙 Yuèzūn fùjiàng Shāngquè (Moon Supreme’s lieutenant, Shangque)

character breakdown: 副将 (fùjiāng) = deputy general, translated by netflix as “lieutenant.” 觞 (shāng) = a wine cup or goblet, or to propose a toast. 阙 (què) = an archaic term for the watchtowers on either side of an (imperial) palace gate.

Dongfang Qingcang, Xiao Lanhua (later), and Xunfeng address Shangque by just his name. Jieli later refers to Shangque by name but addresses him with “stupid black dragon,” usually.

黑龙大哥 hēilóng dàgē: lit. black dragon big brother, translated by netflix as just “Black Dragon.” used by Xiao Lanhua and Jieli to address Shangque, at least in the earlier stages of knowing him — Xiao Lanhua eventually just calls him Shangque, and Jieli switches to “stupid black dragon.” 黑龙大哥 (hēilóng dàgē) is still a respectful form of address, but the appended 大哥 (dàgē) gives a bit of familiarity to it that i feel like “Black Dragon” alone doesn’t quite convey. (Jieli calls him this name as soon as she meets him. my guess is that she is trying to sound close to him, as a ploy to appeal to familiarity in order to persuade him not to throw her in prison.)

觞阙哥哥 Shāngquè gēge: Jieli calls him this at least once in the show, when she’s trying to be cute and wheedle a favor out of him.

觞阙大人 Shāngquè dàren: Lord Shangque (大人 (dàren) is a title of respect toward one’s superior). palace staff address Shangque with this.

蠢黑龙 chǔn hēilóng: stupid black dragon. this is the affectionate insult Jieli uses to address Shangque. 蠢 (chǔn) means stupid, foolish, clumsy, or dull.

属下 shǔxià: subordinate. used by Shangque to refer to himself (in third person) when speaking to Dongfang Qingcang.

将军 jiāngjūn: general. the palace doctor calls Shangque this. it’s odd to me because Shangque was first introduced as “deputy general/lieutenant” — i’m not sure which is more accurate for the name of his position. unless Shangque got a mid-show promotion when i wasn’t looking.

结黎 Jiēlí

character breakdown: 结 (jiē) = (of a plant) to produce fruit; alt. pronunciation jié means to tie, knot, connect, bind. 黎 (lí) = many, multitude; (literary) black, dark; a surname; the Li ethnic group.

掌柜的 zhǎngguìde: shopkeeper, manager of a store. netflix translated this as “Miss” when the delivery man addresses Jieli in ep. 2.

长珩战神 Chánghéng zhànshén (God of War, Changheng)

character breakdown: 长 (cháng) = long or length; always, forever, constantly (not to be confused with zhǎng, an alternate pronunciation of the same character, with a different meaning). 珩 (héng) = an archaic term for the “top gem of a girdle-pendant (as worn by aristocrats and high officials)” (thank you, Pleco). 战 (zhàn) = war, battle, fight. 神 (shén) = god, immortal. 战神 (zhànshén) is his God of War title, and Lady Chidi’s as well.

长珩仙君 Chánghéng xiānjūn: Lord Changheng. fairies call him this, and he is often directly addressed just as 仙君 (xiānjūn) mid-conversation. 仙君 (xiānjūn) lit. means immortal ruler, as a title it’s usually translated to “Lord/my lord” or similar.

Supreme Liyuan and Master Sansheng call him 长珩战神 (Chánghéng zhànshén), in the first episode.

罪仙长珩 zuìxiān Chánghéng: immortal criminal Changheng :(

萧润 Xiāo Rùn: Changheng’s name in the mortal realm arc. 萧 (xiāo) is a surname, and a word that means miserable, desolate, or dreary. 润 (rùn) means moist, sleek; to embellish or enhance; or profit, remuneration.

润郎 Rùn-láng: the friendly name by which Qu Shui addresses Xiao Run, and by which Dongfang Qingcang also addresses Xiao Run when they are being Bros™. (however, when referring to Xiao Run privately, Dongfang Qingcang just calls him Xiao Run.)

萧家二郎 Xiāojiā èrláng: translated by netflix as Mr. Xiao, used to refer to Xiao Run when his gifts were formally presented to Lady Wanqing. i might translate this as “the second child/son of the Xiao family,” but to be honest, the definitions i’ve found for 郎 (láng) are a little hazy to me. i could be wrong. but Xiao Run does have an older brother, who is referred to as 萧家大郎 (Xiāojiā dàláng), which i would translate as “the eldest young master of the Xiao family.” Xiao Run’s father, similar to Dongfang Qingcang, is referring to as 萧家郎君 (Xiāojiā lángjūn), which is translated to “Master,” presumably as the head of house.

萧家郎君 Xiāojiā lángjūn: and on that note, Xiao Run is also addressed as 郎君 (lángjūn)! not often, but on at least a couple occasions, such as by Lady Wanqing and Xiao Lanhua. this form of address is still translated by netflix as Mr. Xiao. again, in other situations Xiao Run is referred to as 二郎 (èrláng), and his father is referred to as 郎君 (lángjūn). i honestly don’t know how the word 郎 (láng) works at this point.

萧公子 Xiāo-gōngzi: also translated as Mr. Xiao. could also be “Young Master Xiao.” used to address him directly.

丹音仙子 Dānyīn xiānzi (Fairy Danyin)

character breakdown: 丹 (dān) = cinnabar, red, powder. 音 (yīn) = sound, musical note, tone, noise.

曲水 Qū Shuǐ: Danyin’s name in the mortal realm arc. 曲 (qū) is a surname, and a word that means bend/to bend. 水 (shuǐ) = water.

蛐蛐儿 Qūqu-ér/Qūqur: it means Cricket, and it contains a homonym for the first character of Qu Shui’s name. this is Xiao Run’s familiar nickname for Qu Shui.

容昊仙君 Rónghào xiānjūn (Lord Ronghao)

character breakdown: 容 (róng) = to hold, contain, allow, tolerate; appearance, look, or countenance. 昊 (hào) = vast, limitless; the vast sky. interesting potential interpretations for his name! (both also happen to be surnames on their own.)

仙君 xiānjūn: Lord, my Lord, in his case. this is how the fairies address him.

阿昊 Ā-Hào: what Lady Chidi calls him. 阿 (ā) is placed as a prefix before monosyllabic names or kinship terms to indicate familiarity; this form of address shows that Lady Chidi is close with her apprentice.

海市主 Hǎishì zhǔ: Lord of Haishi; same 主 (zhǔ) as in 月主 (yuèzhǔ), Moon Queen, meaning “host” or “master”

主上 zhǔshàng: Lord, my lord, the lord. this is how he is addressed and referred to in his Lord of Haishi persona, such as by Dieyi and other Haishi underlings.

海市 (Hǎishì) is made up of the words for “sea/ocean” and “city”; together, they mean “mirage.”

also the 昊 (hào) in 容昊 (Rónghào) is the same as the 昊 (hào) in Haotian Tower, where Dongfang Qingcang was imprisoned. 昊天塔 (Hàotiāntǎ). “the vast, limitless sky” would be my translation of Haotian.

战神 赤地女子 zhànshén Chìdì nǚzǐ (God of War, Lady Chidi)

character breakdown: 赤地 (chìdì) = barren land. there’s an idiom that goes 赤地千里 (chìdì qiānlǐ), meaning “a thousand li of barren land — a scene of utter desolation (after a drought or insect plague)” (copied from Pleco). this definition reminds me of the Xuanxu Realm. hmm … thoughts for later. anyway, 女子 (nǚzǐ) = woman, female.

i’ve seen some translations of her name as “Chidi Woman” but i much prefer “Lady Chidi”

师父 shīfu: Master. this is how Ronghao addresses her (same as Xiao Lanhua towards Master Arbiter Siming).

谢惋卿 Xiè Wǎnqīng: Lady Chidi’s name during the mortal realm arc. 谢 (xiè) is a surname, and also means “to thank,” or sometimes “to apologize.” 惋 (wǎn) is a sigh, or to heave a sigh. 卿 (qīng) has several archaic meanings: high-ranking official, term of endearment between spouses, term used by the emperor for his subjects, or an honorific. (oh, where would i be without my dictionaries…)

惋卿娘子 Wǎnqīng niángzǐ: Lady Wanqing, commonly used to address Xie Wanqing in the mortal realm. when she is addressed as 娘子 (niángzǐ) alone, it is translated as “my lady.” (again: 娘子 (niángzǐ) is a polite form of address for a young woman, at least in Ye Olde Days™; it can also be used to address one’s wife, but that isn’t usually its purpose in this show.)

月族首领 巽风 Yuèzú shǒulǐng Xùnfēng (Moon Tribe Chief, Xunfeng)

character breakdown: 巽 (xùn) = to obey; one of the Eight Trigrams 八卦, symbolizing wood and wind; ☴; ancient Chinese compass point: 135° (southeast) (this definition copied directly from MDBG because all these definitions seem cool). 风 (fēng) = wind

巽风殿下 Xùnfēng diànxià: 殿下 (diànxià) is an honorific, usually meaning “Your Majesty” or “Your Highness”; Xùnfēng diànxià basically means “Your Highness Xunfeng.” he is sometimes addressed as “dianxia” alone, it’s not always Xunfeng dianxia.

to clear up possible confusion: Xunfeng is introduced in ep. 10 with the title card “Moon Tribe Chief,” per the netflix engsubs: 月族首领 (Yuèzú shǒulǐng), Moon Tribe leader/head/chief. this occurs after Dongfang Qingcang is reinstated as Moon Supreme, but in ep. 2 and ep. 10 it was mentioned that Xunfeng was made Moon Supreme (月尊 yuèzūn) upon Dongfang Qingcang’s presumed death 30,000 years earlier. nobody in the show, as far as i’ve noticed, calls or refers to Xunfeng as 首领 (shǒulǐng). the kings of the North and South are also introduced with the title 首领 (shǒulǐng), while we’re on the subject.

Dongfang Qingcang and Xiao Lanhua call him Xunfeng; Shangque and most other people call him 巽风殿下 (Xùnfēng diànxià) or just 殿下 (diànxià).

random note: if you’re like me and some of my friends who have watched this show after watching or reading Tian Guan Ci Fu/Heaven Official’s Blessing, it might seem like 殿下 (diànxià) is a term specific to the prince or crown prince-type figure. turns out, that’s not exactly the case. Xie Lian’s title, 太子殿下 tàizǐ diànxià, marks him as the crown prince. 太子 (tàizǐ) = crown prince. but Xunfeng doesn’t have this title, he’s just Your Highness, 殿下. anyway, this was kinda like that one twitter meme for me. “guy who has only seen tgcf watching any other chinese drama with a prince in it: so when are they gonna call him taizi dianxia?”

another note: it seems to be somewhat common practice on tumblr to refer to his character as Dongfang Xunfeng, but i should mention that nowhere in the show does anyone append Dongfang to his name. for several reasons (see my reblog), i don’t believe Xunfeng has a last name, and i don’t think Dongfang operates like one. it’s likely that Dongfang Qingcang is just the guy’s name, and Xunfeng is just another guy’s name, and that the two brothers don’t necessarily have a family name. BUT, i will say, if you’re looking to bequeath a last name to a modern AU Xunfeng, Dongfang probably works. “Dongfang” is an actual last name, in other contexts.

水云天 帝君 云中君 Shuǐyúntiān dìjūn Yúnzhōng-jūn (Shuiyuntian Emperor, Lord Yunzhong)

character breakdown: 水云天 (Shuǐyúntiān) = lit. water, clouds, sky/heavens. 帝君 (dìjūn) = emperor. 云 (yún) = cloud, 中 (zhōng) = middle, amidst, among; i might translate the meaning of his name as Amidst the Clouds.

云中君 Yúnzhōng-jūn: Lord Yunzhong. this is his usual title when people refer to him.

君上 jūnshàng: my lord. used to directly address Yunzhong. (yes, similar to the 尊上 zūnshàng used to directly address Dongfang Qingcang; “jun” and “zun” really abound with this show, but they are different terms. don’t ask me why some characters have jun and others have zun, i only have a vague notion.)

兄君 xiōngjūn: a specific term for “brother,” used by Changheng to address and refer to Yunzhong; again, similar to how Xunfeng addresses + refers to Dongfang Qingcang with 兄尊 (xiōngzūn)

in Changheng’s trial (perhaps a more official setting), Lord Yunzhong refers to his and Changheng’s father as 父神东君 fùshén Dōng-jūn, Lord Dong (lit. father-god Dong-lord) and Changheng’s mother as 母神 mǔshén (lit. mother-god). in other settings, Changheng refers to Lord Dong as 父君 fùjūn, similar to how Dongfang Qingcang and Xunfeng call their father 父尊 fùzūn.

澧沅仙尊 Lǐyuán xiānzūn (Supreme Liyuan)

character breakdown: 澧 (lǐ) = a surname, as well as a river in Hunan Province called Lishui River. 沅 (yuán) = the name of the Yuan River, another river in Guizhou and Hunan. funnily enough, both rivers flow into Dongting Lake. don’t ask me if that means anything significant, though.

仙尊 xiānzūn: Lord or my lord, in his case. similar to 仙君 (xiānjūn).

爹 diē: “father,” as addressed by his daughters. (please, it is not pronounced like the english word “die” … dee + ehh = dyeh, kinda like that)

司命仙君 Sīmìng xiānjūn (Master Arbiter/Lady Arbiter)

character breakdown: 司 (sī) = a department; to manage, take charge of, or attend to; it’s also a surname. 命 (mìng) = life, fate, destiny. so she Manages Fates, basically.

仙君 xiānjūn: Lord/Lady/Master. this word haunts me

司命星君 Sīmìng xīngjūn: also translated to Lady Arbiter, but there’s a new title this time! this is what Changheng and Dongfang Qingcang call her when they pay her a visit, near the end of the show. 星 (xīng) means star, or heavenly body. so this title means that she’s a lady of the heavens, or something similar. i wonder if this is because she was imprisoned and no longer an immortal of Shuiyuntian, where everyone is referred to with the word 仙 (xiān).

师父 shīfu: master (as addressed by Xiao Lanhua; the chinese subs say 师父, it’s a variant of 师傅, also pronounced shīfu)

sometimes addressed as just 司命 (Sīmìng), such as by Shangque and Dongfang Qingcang at the beginning of the show. by the end of the show, Dongfang Qingcang still refers to her as 司命 (Sīmìng) when speaking with Changheng, but addresses her with her title 司命星君 (Sīmìng xīngjūn) when speaking to her directly. Changheng, in contrast, keeps using her title even when she is not present.

上仙 shàngxiān: high immortal. less of a title and more of a description of her position in Shuiyuntian, e.g., “she is a high immortal of Shuiyuntian.”

海市流芳阁主 蝶衣 Hǎishì Liúfāng-gézhǔ Diéyī (Pavilion Master, Dieyi)

character breakdown: 蝶 (dié) = butterfly. 衣 (yī) = clothes, clothing; cover, skin.

阁主 gézhǔ: Pavilion Master. this is how most of the Haishi underlings address Dieyi.

流芳阁 (Liúfānggé) = Liufang Pavilion. the chinese subs use 留 instead of 流 sometimes, but for all these names and titles i default to the title cards written onscreen, not the subtitles.

三生仙君 Sānshēng xiānjūn (Master Sansheng)

character breakdown: 三 (sān) = three, 生 (shēng) = life, birth. in buddhism, 三生 (sānshēng) refers to three lives — past life, present life, and next life.

仙君 xiānjūn: Lord/Lady/Master, pretty much. if you’ve read this far you should kinda get what this means by now, right? and yes, the term is gender neutral, if anyone was wondering. a lot of these titles are.

三生姑姑 Sānshēng gūgu: Aunt Sansheng; the fairies call her this. (姑姑 gūgu refers to one’s paternal aunt, but can also be a familiar term for an aunt-like figure who is not related by blood.)

元龟 玄武 yuán guī Xuánwǔ (the Great Turtle, Xuanwu)

this dude’s got whole wikipedia pages dedicated to him but i’ll try to sum it up

玄武 (Xuánwǔ) literally means Black Warrior, Dark Warrior, or Mysterious Warrior. it is often translated as the Black Tortoise, though the name contains no animal-related words — this is just due to how it’s usually depicted. the Xuanwu is one of the four symbols of the chinese constellations, each being a guardian of one cardinal direction. the Black Tortoise’s usual epithet is 北方玄武 (běifāng Xuánwǔ), the Black Tortoise of the North. the other three are the Azure Dragon of the East (!! Dongfang Qingcang??), the White Tiger of the West, and the Vermillion Bird of the South. each symbol represents seven of the 28 Mansions; the Xuanwu would be the seven mansions of the north sky (or the god of the north sky in Taoism). each symbol is also associated with a season, time of day, and chinese element, but i’ll let you look those up yourself. anyway. tl;dr he’s a cool dude with a lot going on.

上古神灵玄武 shànggǔ shénlíng Xuánwǔ: netflix’s translation is “Great Turtle. Xiao Lanhua calls him this when she first meets him. i might translate this title as “Ancient God Xuanwu” or similar. 上古 (shànggǔ) = distant past, ancient times, remote ages, antiquity. 神灵 (shénlíng) = god, deity, divinity, spirit, spiritual being, supernatural entity. Xiao Lanhua also addresses him by just 神灵 (shénlíng), a moment later. (it’s translated as “God” — no, not that one.)

玄武上神 Xuánwǔ shàngshén: God Xuanwu, as addressed by Xiyun. could perhaps be translated as High God Xuanwu.

元龟 yuánguī: translated by netflix as the Great Turtle. Sansheng refers to him with this term. the place where we see the Xuanwu is called 玄武幻境 (Xuánwǔ huànjìng), which basically means “Xuanwu dreamland.”

凶神太岁 xiōngshén Tàisuì (Evil God Taisui)

character breakdown: 凶神 (xiōngshén) = evil god; demon, fiend, devil. 太岁 (tàisuì) = a deity, the God of the Year, who was believed to change his dwelling on earth annually; also an archaic name for Jupiter, and a nickname for the most powerful man in a locality. (i think in this show he’s just some kind of evil deity named Taisui, not necessarily the God of the Year described in the dictionary.)

乌姑 Wū-gū (Ms. Wu, Dongfang Qingcang’s childhood caretaker who taught him woodcarving and music)

character breakdown: 乌 (wū) is a surname, but it can also mean “crow” or “black/dark.” 姑 (gū) refers to one’s aunt, a father’s sister; here, it is Dongfang Qingcang’s familiar term for her. (same concept as with Aunt Sansheng, although i’m not sure why it’s translated to Ms. Wu instead of Aunt Wu, especially since she seemed to have a very close relationship with Dongfang Qingcang. the singular 姑 (gū) might convey a bit less familiarity or closeness In Olden Times compared to 姑姑 (gūgū), and Dongfang Qingcang as the young lord might have had to maintain that marginal bit of distance for politeness and tradition and royalty reasons, but i could very much be mistaken, or just reading into it more than necessary.)

look, i know she’s not a major character but she was important to ME, ok! so here’s her name. hope someone writes a fic involving her someday.

长渊 Chángyuān (Arbiter’s dragon husband)

character breakdown: 长 (cháng) = long/length; forever, always, constantly. 渊 (yuān) = deep pool; deep; profound.

罪龙长渊 zuìlóng Chángyuān: convicted dragon Changyuan, dragon criminal Changyuan. same 罪 (zuì) as in “immortal criminal,” 罪仙 (zuìxiān).

aaaaaall righty, i am done for now. (it’s been over a week… phew…) again, i’ll update this if i discover new things or receive suggestions. thanks! :D

#cang lan jue #love between fairy and devil #clj #lbfad #苍兰诀 #meap posts #clj stuff

[salternateunreality2]

MDZS aka SephZack adventures update: episodes 14-23 SHUT UP I'M AN ADULT I CAN WATCH 9 EPISODES IN A ROW IF MY BABIES ARE IN DANGER

Cough

Anyway

Spoilers...

------

Zack: let's fight the tortoise of slaughter!!!!

Sephiroth: *stares in besotted wtf*

Zack: no, it'll be super cool, we can kill it and get the glory and solve the mystery and most importantly, I won't be bored waiting for Genesis to get back!

Sephiroth: *stares in besotted 'bruh, my leg is broke, you ribs is broke, we both got open wounds, we're starving to death, and you want to fight a giant tortoise'*

Zack: no really, I checked and we can't get out, so I'mma be super bored. Come onnnnnn, it'll be fun! 🐶🐶🐶🐶🐶🐶♥️🐶🐶🐶🐶🐶🐶🐶🐶🐶

Sephiroth: ...this is going to be our entire relationship, isn't it? Ok.

Zack: YESSSSSS, after we make some weapons, I'll jump into its shell because apparently that's a thing I can do!

Sephiroth: ...ok

---------------

The fight with the dick head (literally) Tortoise of Slaughter (solid naming decision) goes great, but Zack succumbs to the infection he undoubtedly got from SWIMMING WITH AN OPEN WOUND AND PROBABLY BROKEN RIBS, THEN RUNNING AROUND THE FESTERING INNARDS OF A TORTOISE OF SLAUGHTER.

Sure, the evil sword energy probably didn't help, and I'm sure canon is saying "um, actually" as we speak, but come on, Zack. The magic grass you packed into your boo's leg wound next to the weirdly short, unsanitary sticks was limited.

---------

The whole fight, Zack is battling with the evil sword miasma, and Sephiroth is making this face:

It's very cute, I am HERE for it.

--------

Zack: 😵

Sephiroth: 😦😦😦😦 you have a fever!!!

Salty: gee I wonder why

Zack: mmm sing me a song

Salty: how about medical treatment, such as getting you out of the wet clothes, sharing spiritual energy, prying your hands off the evil sword that made you sick...

Sephiroth: ok *sings in simp*

Zack: 🥴😵‍💫 what's that song called?

Sephiroth: Wangxian, our ship name, but I don't say it out loud so the Chinese censors are happy ❤️

Zack: ❤️😵‍💫🥴🐶❤️😵

Salty: ffs, if cuteness could cure stupidity, we wouldn't be in this situation, but as it is, keep trying to fix his stupidity/fever with adorableness, it's working for my shipping heart.

---------

The next [way too many] episodes:

------

Then Wen Ning aka Cloud comes in clutch! Wen Ning is baby, and he is BEST BABY EVER ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️🐥

-------

Some quick plot points:

Genesis gets degradation, Zack gets him out of it.

Gen's girlfriend helps because she's nice (?) like that.

Gen's parents die.

A war happens with zombie degradation clones.

Zack gets yeeted by the villains into a den of unmitigated horror (not Hojo's labs, but just as nasty).

Everything sucks.

I sat on the toilet to cry into my shirt, not knowing why. It was because I watched the sad thing in my room and the toilet was the only place where the sad wasn't happening. Also it took me a full several hours to realize watching a sad thing made me sad #neurodivergence #isfun #andquirky!

THEN THE BOYS GOT BACK TOGETHER FUCK YEAH!!!!!

---------

Sephiroth: you should probably not fuck around with this newfound angry spirit power...

Zack: remember my cute puppy face?

Sephiroth: fuck

Zack: 🐶

Sephiroth: 🥴

Genesis: STOP MAKING EYES AT EACH OTHER. FUCK OR GET TO WORK!

Angeal (btw he's alive): they are so fucking cute

Zack's sister: dude they so are ❤️

Genesis: we are at WAR

Angeal: I'm gonna be a bridesmaid

Zack's sister: GASP we should get matching outfits!

Genesis: 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

--------

Zack: *waits until the LAST minute to whip out his fancy angry spirit powers* Hey Idiot Poop Face, how bout that?!

Idiot Poop Face: 🤬 *chokes Zack* *it's not kinky*

Sephiroth; *is jealous anyway* *catches bb Zack as he passes out from using angry spirit powers and being choked* *my dude was like half a football field away* *then he appeared out of nowhere to catch his boo*

Salty: *clicks rewind several times because it's fucking adorable*

#ff7 #sephiroth #zack fair #genesis rhapsodos #cloud strife #angeal hewley #die hojo die #wei wuxian #lan wangji #mdzs #crack #tortoise of slaughter #im fine #im not fine

[worldweaverofmediocrity]

Isekai Heroes: Chapter 12

what I wrote today for Isekai Heroes

“I do have self control.” Ainz said. “Though, I do hope that the Queen is more sensible than her husband. I would like to remove his Vassal Weapon.”

“Can’t do that.” Tanya said, snapping out of her daydream. “The Vassal Kick Vote needs to be unanimous or abstaining.”

Kazuma resisted the urge to faceplant and scream into his food. 

Ainz raised a finger. “Say Subaru, why do you put up with Aultcray?”

“Demiurge.” Subaru said.

Ainz lowered his finger.

Kazuma sank in his seat, slapping away Tanya’s posture fixing hand.

“Anyways, while we were separated, Being X temporarily gave me a book on this world’s legends.” Tanya said. “Specifically about four Guardian Beasts who are regrown/respawned everytime the Waves happen. What these Beasts do is kill roughly 2 thirds of the World’s population to form a barrier that will stop the waves entirely. The first one is called the Spirit Tortoise and if anyone encounters a turtle-shelled monster, that isn’t a turtle type, then that means it has awakened.”

The nobles fortunate enough to overhear the Heroes table blinked in shock. Kazuma sank until only his eyes were above the table. Ainz had retrieved a notebook and writing tools to transcribe Tanya’s thoughts. Genesis gave baby doll eyes towards Kazuma’s portion and Subaru was rubbing the back of her head.

“Of course, these Spirit Tortoise Familiars are deadly and thus require fighters of level 50 to adequately fend off. That is for the Weakest Bat-Type Familiars, this weakness is compensated by the fact that the Bat-types can shoot an eye-laser that implants a Familiar Egg into you.” Tanya said, projecting her voice. “If the eggs do not hatch within a few days, then you get turned into one of the stronger variants, an Amalgam Parasite Type Familiar.”

Even King Aultcray was frowning at the news. “This is a Victory Party, please do not bring down the mood with such dire news. I expected that from the Wa-Sword  or Shield Heroes. Not you, Lady Tanya.”

Tanya bent her head. “As you wish.”

“At least she got the important identification and danger out before getting censored.” Her fellow veterans thought.

“Damn Loli privilege.” Kazuma hid his glare by looking at the table. “If any of us tried that, we would be tossed into a completely unnecessary duel to defend the King’s honor. Or some bullshit like that.”

Genesis trilled as a Waiter deposited more food for the table.

#progress report #Isekai Heroes #overlord #saga of tanya the evil #re:zero #konosuba #the rising of the shield hero #isekai quartet

[oimoi-op]

Noodler's has announced changes on certain labels in light of the recent controversy. These include several name changes and some inks being discontinued. I got the list from Noodler's Instagram, and I have this typed out under the cut below.

INKS

Kiowa Peca >>> Pecan

Apache Sunset >>> Southwest Sunset

Ottoman Rose >>> Rose in the Louvre

Navajo Turquoise >>> Mesa Turquoise

Tiananmen is DISCONTINUED

Ottoman Azure >>> Azure

Shah's Rose >>> Pearl Diver Coral

Bernanke Black >>> Brevity Black

Bernanke Blue >>> Brevity Blue

Rome Burning >>> Rome

Q-E'ternity >>> Brevity Blue-Black

Park Red is DISCONTINUED

House Divided is DISCONTINUED

Anti-Fascist Blue >>> X-Feather Blue

Noodler's 1984 Ink is DISCONTINUED

Censor Red >>> Brevity Red

Nikita is TBD

Dragon's Napalm >>> Dragon's Fire

PENS

Apache Tortoise Konrad Flex and Ahab >>> Mesa Tortoise

Cherokee Pearl Ahab >>> Oklahoma

Comanche Ahab >>> Brazos River

Black Crow Ahab >>> Raven

Huron Ahab >>> Lake Champlain

Iroquois Ahab >>> Lake Erie

Navajo Turquoise >>> Mesa Turquoise

Pima Tortoise Ahab >>> Canyon Tortoise

Zuni Ahab >>> Wilderness Twilight

NIBS

Zuni standard flex nib >>> Wilderness Twilight

#pens #fountain pens #noodler's drama #i can't in good conscience recommend noodler's due to both shitty qc and shitty nathan tardiff but hey. updates are updates #oimoi rants about pointless stationery bullshit

[crypticcolubrid]

Tatted tortoise jelly? Posing pinup style??

#with a tortoise censor #is that tortoiseception? #food fantasy #ff tortoise jelly #ff fanart #hot male #tattoos

[thehypercutstudios]

Costume Wonderworld Trailer

Ok, so I decided to do a trailer of Costume Wonderworld If it is a series, so yeah enjoy.

[trailer starts with two Kid mages swirling around inside in what appears to be a tornado of magic, holding onto each other]

Leo: Hang on Emma, I got a plan to get out of this mess! I am going to use my magic to make a forcefield just in case we fall!

Emma: are you crazy, Leo?? It would make you weak!

Leo: Just trust me! *scene shows Leo successfully using the forcefield but some magic smacks the shield down and make them fall to the ground which made the scene go black*

[scene shows Leo’s point of view as he woke up in a farmhouse]

Leo: Ugh…Where-…Where am I? [scene cuts to him going outside and sees a colorful country landscape] Woah, what is this place? [scene then cuts to Leo looking around in the cornfield] I need to find Emma and see what is going on. [he bumps to a big figure and scene shows a big adult figure and reveals to be a Tornado Wolf hybrid aka Tornado Wolfman named Jose Gallard]

Jose: Well Howdy there, Name’s Jose Gallard [scene cuts to a shocked Leo] and you must be Leo Craig.

Leo: Ahhhh! A werewolf who knows my name!!

Jose: What? I am no werewolf, I am a Tornado Wolfman which is a fancy word for Tornado Wolf Hybrid.

Leo: Oh, but how did you know my name? [camera view moves to see Emma coming out]

Emma: He’s a friend of Balan and Lance, no need to panic.

[scene then changes to the view of different places of Wonderworld and changes to Jose walking with Leo and Emma in a marketplace as the Bout theme plays]

Jose: Welcome to Wonderworld, where special beings called Hybrids lived peacefully with no harm. What brings you two into Wonderworld?

Emma: Well, we got stranded by a magic storm when we got parted by Balan and Lance. [scene cuts to two Guardian Harpies in Treetop Forest]

Guardian Harpy 1: Oh those poor things.

[scene cuts back to Leo and Emma and Jose walking in a forest]

Jose: in order to find Balan and Lance, you have to find [scene shows the inhabitants in freeze frame style] 12 inhabitants of twelve lands in Wonderworld to get the answer you are looking.

Leo: Alright, then where is the first inhabitant? *scene cuts to Jose pointing at himself* Ok that seems easy, but what makes you think you are the first inhabitant?

Jose: well first I live here and I [scene cuts to Jose showing his chest by opening his shirt which is censored from a different angle] have this heart symbol on me.

Leo and Emma: *disgusted freak out sounds*

Leo: Point made! Point made! [scene shows Jose putting his shirt back on]

[Bout music continues to play as there is a montage of action and silliness happening and it changes to Leo looking behind him after looking at the Wolf shaped mountain]

Leo: Don’t worry, Emma and I will save you from your negativity.

[scene cuts to in Isolated Hive where Wormsworth screeches at them]

Jose: Woah that is one big ugly bug! [scenes are shown to be a montage of action and silly moments again]

Emma: And no matter what it takes, we will gather twelve heroes to help out!

[scene shows everyone cheering and then cuts to Cal being with Leo laying in Their sleeping tents]

Cal: I can see why Balan and Lance choose you and Emma to help us out…you have pure hearts, yet you are not hybrids.

[scene cuts to some silly action montage until finally a scene shows a big magical door]

Emma: Don’t worry Balan and Lance, wherever you are, we will find you and hope that you two are ok!

Title: COSTUME WONDERWORLD

[scene shows Attilio the Happy Clown hybrid perform with juggling and unicycling while telling jokes]

Attilio: And so I said to the Slow Tortoise Tim “Don’t be so Shell Shocked Buddy, it’s just the wind!” [circus audience laughs with scene changed to Cal laughing in amusement in the Chess Kingdom as the Chess Kingdom’s royal servants laughing in amusement and then it changes to Brook the Quad Cannonman looking confused]

Brook: I don’t get it. [gets slapped on the back by Sir Ivory II] Ow!

Sir Ivory II: When the King laughs, he finds it funny like us! You better get the joke or I will send you to the Dungeon of Shame!

Brook: *nervous sweat and starts laughing* hehehehehe..I get it.

Sir Ivory II: That’s much better.

Text: The Show starts coming soon..

[End of Trailer]

#Balan Wonderworld #bww #balanposting #bww au #bww hybrids au #Hybrids au #Costume Wonderworld #Trailer transcript

[canary3d-obsessed]

Restless Rewatch: The Untamed Episode 14 first part

(RR The Untamed Masterpost) (Canary’s Pinboard - more Masterposts) 

Warning: Spoilers for All 50 Episodes!

Murder Turtle, Continued

Lan Wangji wakes up after a good night's sleep leaning against a rock wall, to find that his leg is no longer splinted, and his perfectly clean and unbloody headband has been put back on his head while he was sleeping.

Leaving aside the "not waking up" part of things, how, exactly, did Wei Wuxian get his headband on without mussing his hair? Did he bring a crochet hook?

Wei Wuxian gives him a sitrep and then they cozy up and have an extended conversation about the nature and history of the Tortoise of Slaughter. Wei Wuxian is interested in everything Lan Wangji has to say, and Lan Wangji talks a lot more than usual; they are completely on the same wavelength here and are enjoying swapping obscure knowledge.

Lan Wangji: My lacerated leg and I are actually super aware that it has big teeth, but thanks for the reminder.

In the course of the conversation, Wei Wuxian mentions his plan to 1. sneak into the tortoise's shell and 2. drive it out of its shell so they can attack it. 

OP did a little tortoise research and learned that the only species of turtle that can leave its shell is the Koopa Troopa.

Good news for Wei Wuxian: If you jump on its shell in the right spot, you can rack up a pile of extra lives.

Does that make the Tortoise of Slaughter a giant Koopa Troopa? Perhaps...the king of the Koopa Troopas?

I'm gonna say yes.

(More after the cut)

Let’s Go Killing

Wei Wuxian is exhilarated by the idea of fighting a giant dangerous monster with Lan Wangji. Some day Wei Wuxian will found the Nike clan, because his motto is definitely "Just do it." 

It's sweet how, in his romantic notions about chivalry and Lan Wangji, he's completely elided the original reason they were (sort of) told to venture together. 

Wei Wuxian: I'm still on the "find the Yin Iron" quest; I'm just skipping the "suppress it" part.  

Wei Wuxian weighs up their chances against Bowser and tells Lan Wangji that even if they die, it will be badass to be killed by a famous monster, so they won't have to feel embarrassed.

This is the exact moment that Lan Wangji's feelings for Wei Wuxian go from "smitten" to "gagging for it."

Lan Wangji: as soon as we get out of here I'm going to borrow a whole lot of books from Nie Huaisang

The boys come up with a plan that involves a rather long montage of collecting archery equipment and deconstructing it. This potentially-dull montage is fun to watch because they are both very, very good looking.

Artists who want to draw Wang Yibo as an elven archer, this is your episode.

Now we suddenly have, with zero explanation, telepathy. Ok, sure. It seems to work kind of like a phone conversation, in which they say specific things to each other, rather than like Cherry Magic telepathy where you can hear everything the other person is thinking. Or at least, neither of them is embarrassed, so I assume they are maintaining some mental privacy.

Club Ruohan

Same, Wen Chao, same

At some point there is a boring sequence at Club Ruohan.  Wen Ruohan doesn't know where Xue Yang is, but really wants his hunk of Yin Iron. Wen Chao thinks that WRH's 3 pieces of Yin Iron should be able to beat Xue Yang's 1 piece, but apparently he is dumb and that is not how math works. O...kay? OP does not understand this either but whatever, Wen Ruohan is boring, moving on. This scene is really just here to make us think about Yin Iron before Wei Wuxian jumps into Bowser's shell.

Bigger On The Inside

So then Wei Wuxian climbs into Bowser's shell, which is, to quote The 12th Doctor, bigger on the inside.

Bowser’s shell is the approximate size of my entire house. It is also bathed in a hellish pure red photo filter, which OP has done her best to remove for these gifs, because it gives me eye strain and it obscures Xiao Zhan's hotness.

Camera Operator: What did I do? 

Wei Wuxian wanders around inside, finding random corpses encased in slime cocoons. Tortoise, spider, xenomorph, whatever. There are also random curtain things hanging all over, and then at one point Wei Wuxian stares into the face of a corpse, and then does a jump scare response at the camera operator even though nothing particular happened. 

I imagine the corpse was supposed to open its eyes and say "killl meeee" but it got censored. He also makes about 8 other faces at the camera operator, so we get that the inside of this TARDIS-like tortoise shell (must...resist...temptation...to...say...TORDIS) is yucky.

Lan Wangji waits outside listening to Wei Wuxian telepathically complain about the smell.  He is anxiously clenching a bundle of string and an arrow, and wishing he could clench Wei Wuxian Bichen instead.

Serendipitous Yin Iron

Wei Wuxian backs his way through the TORDIS until his butt bumps into a sword that is steaming with resentful energy. That's right: Wei Wuxian is about to pull a piece of Yin Iron almost literally out of his ass.

He grabs it and is overwhelmed by its screaming resentful energy and has to let it go again.

So this is what a vibrator with 4 batteries feels like

When Bowser comes looking for him, however, he quickly decides to go for it, grabbing the sword and singing "I've Got the Power (Gonna Make You Sweat)"

Wei Wuxian plunges the sword into Bowser's lower jaw, and Bowser pulls his entire head out of his shell with Wei Wuxian attached, while leaving the rest of his body and all rational laws of physics inside the shell.

Gamera Versus the Cultivators

What follows is one of the more ridiculous action sequences in the history of the world, and I say that as someone who likes Mothra movies. 

Wei Wuxian hovers in a perfect horizontal plank while “hanging from” the sword, which is held well below the level of his torso. While Bowser spins him around. For much of the time, Bowser keeps his head still and just waves his neck around.

Lan Wangji and the camera operator do everything they possibly can to make "guy pulls on string" look interesting. 

Everybody tries really, really hard and the actors are great at pretending something is there when it isn't, but this whole sequence is just horribly conceived.

What works well, though, is the Yin energy and Wei Wuxian's wrangling of it. He starts off being frightened and overwhelmed, and looking like it's too much for him; I dont' know if they made his face puffy on purpose or if that's just what happens when you spend days hanging from the ceiling fighting an imaginary monster. But he looks slack and unwell as he grapples with the iron sword.

Which makes this moment, when he gets control of it, deliciously creepy. He uses the power of the Yin Iron to stick a bunch of pokey things into Bowser's neck.

Lan Wangji has seen him struggling and now sees him...not struggling. Which scares the piss out of him, and he moves to finish the fight as quickly as possible, slicing up his hand and breaking the string. Combined with the pokey things, this does the trick and Bowser dies while Wei Wuxian faints and falls into the water.

Do the Whumpty Whump

Lan Wangji rescues him and wakes him up, and Wei Wuxian clutches the Yin Iron sword and tells Lan Wangji that he was knocked out by the screaming of disembodied voices.

This certainly sounds like a strange and dangerous phenomenon, so Lan Wangji carefully asks him to explain everything.

Ha ha ha j/k. Lan Wangji asks him exactly nothing about the strange sword or the black smoke or his weird evil smile or his new power over pointy objects. Lan Wangji appears to have a Star Trek: TNG level of unconcern about strange phenomena happening directly under his nose. But in fact he has noticed what's up, which is why he will be instantly distressed when he sees Wei Wuxian's flute moves at the Wen Corporate Headquarters.

Wei Wuxian has a fever (stay positive test negative) and comments on Lan Wangji's being so nice to him.

Wei Wuxian: I could never have imagined Lan Er Gongzi acting this concerned about me. Lan Wangji: what else have you never imagined me doing, while we're on the subject? 

Lan Wangji transfers a stream of spiritual energy to him. Lan Wangji has so much spiritual power he can be a battery for Wei Wuxian without breaking a sweat or, like, noticing whether Wei Wuxian has a golden core or not, for that matter.

Wei Wuxian basks in the nice feeling of gigajoules for a while but then decides he's bored. So then he pouts, whines, and cajoles Lan Wangji in exactly, EXACTLY the way he whines at Jiang Yanli.  I think this, while annoying of him, is a leap forward in his relationship with Lan Wangji.

He's letting his guard down and not just allowing Lan Wangji to take care of him; he's demanding to be cared for on multiple vectors, when he asks the guy who's already busy healing him to sing to him as well.

Lan Wangji obliges, singing him the song he composed about their love cultivation journey, while Wei Wuxian (or possibly Lan Wangji) (or possibly both) has a flashback to assorted sexy interactions that they've had so far.

Wei Wuxian memorizes the song perfectly on one hearing, before passing out.

Writing Prompt: Baldur’s Gate III / Untamed Crossover AU featuring elf archer Lan Wangji

I DARE YOU

Soundtrack: 1. Everybody Dance Now by C+C Music Factory 2. Paradise by the Dashboard Light by Meatloaf 

Wei Wuxian fainting tally (cumulative): 3

#fytheuntamed #the untamed #wangxian #the untamed gifs #the untamed meta #the untamed spoilers #restless rewatch the untamed #my gifs #canary3d-original #asian whump

[leomonae]

I feel like someone should have informed me that The Untamed isn't simply entertaining, but also good.

I'm only ("only") up to episode 20, I'm quite clearly missing a bunch of cultural context here which has rendered a fair bit of it rather baffling (and also the English subtitles are not always 100% clear - it took me a good ten episodes to figure out that what they were translating as 'boring' was probably more like 'tiresome' and I remain utterly lost by a number of other translation choices like describing some very upright, serious, by the book dudes as vapid), I remain perpetually unsure of what's meant to be taken literally and what's metaphorical, but nevertheless, it's clearly still very well done! The pacing falls down now and then, but the overall sense of progression and building towards war and the characters' weariness as it continues and they lose more and more feels very believable! The women are constrained by their various circumstances (and again this is a place where there's room for improvement), but they've obviously thought about what that means, how it wouldn't be universal or render them entirely ineffective, and made at least some attempts to mitigate that and develop them fully regardless!

Also there's a little dude called the tortoise of SLAUGHTER. Which will never not be delightful.

Also also, I can't help but think at times that they caught the anti-gay censors in a good mood, because, uh... they get away with some pretty blatant stuff sometimes? I mean, sure, it's ridiculous that showing a child being run through with a sword on screen is fine and dandy yet god forbid these two men ever kiss, but I would not exactly describe the central (implied) relationship as subtly executed. Looking at you, tortoise of SLAUGHTER cave scene.

#the untamed

[popculturebuffet]

Tex Avery Birthday Spectacular!

Hello all you happy people! And welcome to a celebration of the only cartoon director I knew as a kid and one of the finest whose ever lived, Mr. Tex Avery. 

Avery is a legend in the animation industry and rightly so. Starting out at a few other studios, and loosing sight in one of his eyes due to some tomfoolery at one, Tex was annoyed with the restrctive enviorment and eventually found his way to Termite Terrace, the animated shorts wing of Leon Schislenger Productions, aka the future Warner Brothers Studios and the makers of Looney Tunes. And his impact on the franchise is vast, cannot be overstated and I only learned about just how much recently: The man created Daffy Duck and Bugs Bunny, created the prototype for Elmer Fudd, and created the design for Porky we’re all far more familiar with. 

Eventually though while he was happy there, his career when ended when he eventually got into a squabble with Leon schsinger over the ending of “The Heckling Hare” and left soon after. Given he got a four week unpaid suspension for it , a bit extreme given all he’d given the studio, I can’t blame him. He instead went over to MGM who badly needed his wacky energy, and thus got to go as nuts as he wanted, with creative control a better budget and the result was his peak and classic characters like Red and my personal faviorite and personal boy: Droopy. I will try and do a birthday thing for him next month, we’ll see if my rather packed schedule will allow for it. Point is I watched the guys cartoons a lot as a kid between looney tunes and his shorts being repacked for the Tex Avery show in the late 90′s, and until recently I had no idea the depth and scope of his career: The guy gave looney tunes it’s standard fourth walll breaking and made it a huge part of the industry, and he was the one to hlep htem break out of being a Disney knockoff and into what we know today. The guy has my utmost respect so today I honor him as the first animator to get one of my birthday specials: As is my standard ten shorts, my patreons get to pick one each (I now have two but she start’s next month so her benefits will too) if they so choose (Kev opted out of the porky pig one next week) and I went to my friend blah for a recomendation as he’s an avid fan of the golden age of animation and thus usually has a really good choice up his sleeve. Now that’s out of hte way join me under the cut for some shenanigans as old tex would want it that way. 

1. The Gold Diggers of 49 (1935)

This was Tex Avery’s first short with warner and the first of his I could find, not ot mention his first time working with Chuck Jones and Bob Clampett, who he’d mentor and go on to be the heart and soul of Looney Tunes and define the characters Tex created. And since this is more significant than his earlier work i’m coutning it as his first. And as a start it’s.. ehhhhhhh. 

I don’t blame him for it though.  Most don’t hit it out of hte park their first time up to bat, and frankly the deck was stacked against him. He was saddled with Beans the Cat...

No one brak no one. He was part of an attempt by warner to create a new star as part of a Little Rascals/Our Gang style group of kids debuting in the short “I Haven’t Got a Hat”. This short is notable not for Beans, who no one cares about, but for the debut of Looney Tunes first star: Porky Pig. Porky was just one of the various characters but the only one audiences really liked. It took some time for Warner to get the hint though, hence Beans starring here and Porky playing his girlfriend’s father.. and also now being much older than him for some reason. 

So instead of being a Little Rascals ripoff bean is now a mickey mouse ripoff, as the short gives me mickey mouse vibes.. but without the things that made those shorts actually good and feels mostly built on studios trying to make what they think audiences will like. There’s sparks of waht Tex would become.. but just not enough wiggle room for him to make something special. Also porky looks and sounds weird in this one and Bean’s girlfriend has a REALLY annoying voice. Oh and two horrible Asian stereotypes, because it was acceptable at the time but lord was it never okay. Then again I should be at least mildly greatful none of the shorts had blackface.. because tex apparently REALLY had a problem with that, something I obviously didn’t know as a kid as they edited it out but given most of his MGM shorts have “blackface edited out of x version”, yeahhh.... I may like the guy, quite a bit and feel those gags weren’t done out of malice.. but it dosen’t make them okay, they were never okay and he should’ve done better. 

2. I Love to Singa (1936) Thankfully our next entry is 800% better, as we get a classic from my childhood and probably multiple childhoods. Admittedly part of the reason this one stuck in my head is the title song, sung by a young jazz singing owl whose dad doesn’t like that he sings Jazz instead of classical, enters a contest and nearly looses singing classical to please his dad only for his dad to intervene and finally accept his son. It’s a wonderful story of acceptance with some decent gags, beautiful animation and one hell of a title track that will probably never leave my head. The song is really what makes this short and sometimes that’s okay. Also just to note so someone else doesn’t: This short was a parody of the Jazz Singer one of the first talkie’s.. and also a film that uses blackface and whose 80′s remake bafflingly also uses blackface for some reason. Yes really. 

3. Tortoise Beats Hare (1941)

One of Tex’s only four Bugs Shorts.. but given 3/4 of them are certified classics, and one of them involving a horrible stereotype.. to the point it’s part of the rightfully infamous “Censored 11″ and the ONLY one involving Bugs Bunny. 

So as I said, Tex has a bad history with casual racism, and while it was the style at the time and I don’t THINK he was actively malicious towards black people.. it doesn’t make some of his work any less harmful. The rest of his bugs work though is remembered for the right reasons: his first appearance, and early classic we’ll get to next.. and this standout everyone who saw it as a kid or an adult fondly remembers. 

You all know the premise: Bugs finds out, in an utterly brilliant wall shattering bit at the start where he reads off the crew names and then the title, that this picture will have him beaten by a turtle and taking offense to that challenges the guy. This is honestly one of the few Bugs shorts where he’s the out and out villain of the picture. He’s doing this race purely out of ego, yells at Cecil whose perfectly nice in this one, and in general is the bully set up for a fall he’d later be famous for taking on. But it works, both because this si early in bugs career so it’s entirely in character, and because Mel just really sells the obnoxiousness while still being funny. 

This short also has one of Tex’s trademark setups as this is essentially a prototypical droopy cartoon: A meek, goofy voiced protagonist whose shorter than his large obnoxious enemy and who torments him by showing up every where he’s going to be and casually doing it. Cecil even does so using an army of fellow turtles with Droopy later using a similar trick in one of his shorts. As a big Droopy fan i’m clearly not complaining and while Droopy would do it better, this short’s still a classic for a reason with tons of great bits and is a fun break from the usual bugs setup, though in full fairness the usual bugs setup is still solid gold so take that how you will. 

4. The Heckling Hare (1941)

Originally I was going to have Daffy in Hollywood in this spot as I thought it was on Max, it was not,  so I swapped it out with his final bugs cartoon. For the record his first, and Bugs, is being saved for Bugs birthday this summer. And honestly i’m glad I did because this was 7 mintues of pure joy that has another setup that Tex himself and other Looney Tunes animators would resuuse: Bugs being pitted up against a far dumber antagonist. One who often still fully deserves it but allows him to just have fun for several minutes at this dumb bastard’s expense. It works well here, with tons of clever gags, my faviorite being the two doing dumb faces with each other only for bugs to stop and pull out a sign as seen right above. 

It’s also an approriate capper to our warner made Tex shorts for the day, as this would be the one that got him fired. He and Schisnger argued over it and he got suspended as I mentioned and I found it again a bit fucking extreme. So did Tex and after a handful of shorts elsewhere, he’d move over to MGM, whose cartoons would ironically be bought up by warner. They needed a shot in the arm to compete with Disney and Warner and Tex was happy to provide hte needle filled with nonsense. And the results.. are pure gold. 

5. Dumb Hounded (1943)

I’ll admit as a kid I didn’t know Tex’s MGM shorts were theatrical, or any shorts but somehow I knew they weren’t looney tunes. Besidds obviously having hteir own show they just had their own tone and pacing and style. While the Looney Tunes aren’t bad, at all honestly, Tex’s work here was in a class by itself with MGM gladly giving him a higher budget and even more creative freedom. And the results speak for themselves and one of those results is one of if not my faviorite classic cartoon character. And since I might not be able to get to his birthday with one of these next month, though i’m certainly going to try march is just VERY VERY FULL. Anyways point is our happy hero was introduced here. And given i’m frequently depressed and often withdrawn, not that you could tell from my reviews here, I related to this depressed bulldog who always won anyway despite being an outsider, finding love, sucess and always beating a much larger, much more assholish antagonist. But Droopy is good on his own merits as his shorts are just that funny. 

This was true from Day One as dumb hounded is fucking perfect: The Wolf that Avery always used in his cartoons escapes from jail and is hunted by bloodhounds including our boy, who charmingly introduces himself with “You know what, i’m the hero”. From there it’s a simple setup but a great one as Droopy finds the guy.. then chases him from here to enternity with one amazing gag after another. Simple, utterly hilarious and the dawn of a legend, with the ending having Droopy go a bit nuts after getting his reward money before returning to his usual demeanor “You know what? I’m happy” So am I bud, so am I. 

6. Red Hot Riding Hood (1943)

Yup same year. Tex hit the ground sprinting. This one is his signature MGM toon and for good reason. Using his usual forth wall breaking style, both the wolf and red riding hood rebel when it opens with a typical telling, so it changes to a 40′s nightlife setting: Grandma lives in a penthouse and is man hungry, Red is a fanservicey night club act and the Wolf is a sexually harassing asshole who chases after here and has some over the top reactions to her that are iconic in some’s mind.

The short is gorgeously animated with Red’s dance sequence and Wolfie’s reactions being the highlight and the short isn’t as bad as it could be as the wolf is treated as a scumbag for hitting on her and generally being a creep. SO the first two thirds aren’t bad with nice touches like the narrator clearly improvising the new story. It’s just badly hampered by the last half where Grandma sexually harasses Wolfie and it just doesn’t work. This double standard stuff annoys me and “haha get it it’s funny when a woman stalks a man” isn’t funny. Wolfie stalking her really isn’t that funny either it’s just not you know an entire third of the film. So a classic for a reason.. but one that really has degraded with time. Still worth analyzing and what not, just not great. 

7. Who Killed Who? (1943)

Yes still. It was a good year. This is another one off like Red Hot Riding Hood and as is tradition since the Tom and Jerry one, my patreons each get to pick one and Kev selected this one. And this.. was a great choice. 

Seriously I could not stop laughing with a great gag a minute, WAY too many to mention, a classic ending, and just nothing but net the whole time. I don’t have much to say really.. but because this one’s just good. The whodunnit genre hasn’t really gone away, it’s cliches are welll known even today and this is a lovely parody of it that hits the ground running after a live action intro and runs right through the wall across a lake and straight into droopy “You moved.”. 

The only real observation I have other than “This is fucking awesome watch it immediately” is that the villian looks exactly like the Phantom Blot. Who knew the Phantom Blot was a live action guy with a weird haircut the whole time huh?  Seriously this one is a masterpiece, an instant faviorite, and I highly recommend it. 

8. Screwball Squirrel (1944)

As you can probably guess by how I lead it in this one is not very good. It is tex TRYING to make a bugs or daffy type character again and somehow failing at it. He created them, he did plenty of shorts like theirs with other characters and got how the cat and mouse antics of the old theatrical shorts worked.. so I have no idea how this one happened. 

I’m really not overselling it: The short is about Screwy, who hyjacks it from a cute widdle bunny clearly parodying bambi.. who he beats the shit out of, then decides to get things going asks a dumb dog to hunt him, then insults him to provoke him to attacking him. He then spends the entire short tormenting the poor dumb bastard who again HE PROVOKED. It feels like a poor imitation of dumb hounded, as while Bugs clearly outclassed the dog there, he’d die if he lost, so while he was punching down, he clearly didn’t have a choice and you can’t honestly blame him. Here, Screwy is fine, he just wants someone’s head to fuck with and spends a whole short torturing him. We don’t even get catarsis as while the dog does catch him at the end via  weird gag, they end up deciding to beat up the bunny instead. 

His voice is also just the worst, just utterly grating and making me wish an anvil woudl fall on HIM instead. Screwy would return for some other shorts but I have no idea why. This was easily the weakest of these ten shorts and I will probably not return to the guy next year.

9. Bad Luck Blackie (1949)

This is one i’d forgotten till I got a ways in. It’s also weirdly one of the only MGM Tex shorts on HBO Max as this was included in the Tom and Jerry collection for some reason, the dog in it clearly isn’t the tom and Jerry verison of spike... though the dog Droopy fought a lot was indeed called spike. Yes that is confusing, no I don’t know why MGM thought this was a good idea. 

 As a result though I have been saving giving out about this till now but seirously , put the tex avery shorts on HBO Max. Their on Blu-Ray, their on boomerang, especially Droopys. I do not get why they aren’t on here. I’m tired of them holding things out for the boomerang app when not everyone subscirbes to that. Let me have my morose dog dammit. 

That giving out aside i’m glad this one caught my eye via i’ts weird name as it’s another masterpiece. It also does what one Tom and Jerry short I reviewed, the one where tom’s a millionare,  earlier this month failed to: properly make it’s antagonist loathsome enough to deserve the parade of abuse he gets. With that one Tom is tourturning jerry for like 30 seconds, but Jerry torments him for most of 5 minutes. 

Here we get about two minutes of our lead kitten getting torremnted by a mean bulldog. It’s not only still a bit entertaining to lessen the horror just enough to be watchable but not enough to make the bulldog likeable, but it makes what happens for the rest of the short oh so fucking satsifying. While the previous short today really didn’t get the karmic ballance neded for a good classic screwball comedy short this one overwhelmingly does.

Our kitten gets some help in the form of Blackie, a professional black cat who agrees to turn the tables, sauntring across to a wonderfully catchy tune. any time the little guy whistles. The result from there is 5-6 nonstop minutes of comedy genius, as Tex finds new and creative ways for the cat to come out of nowhere, and even shakes things up to keep it intresting towards the end iwth the dog getting the whistle.. only for it to still not work out, and for our little kitten to get his revenge at last by painting himself black after the bulldog paints blackie white. As should be obvious by now, it’s really good, showing Screwball Squirrel was the exception not the rule. In general Tex was this good during his mgm and when he was at his peak we got gems like this. Truly sensational, watch it if you have max it’s under the tom and jerry section for some reason. 

10. T.V. of Tommorow A decent one I remember seeing as a kid. Not much to say though, it’s mostly a bunch of gags about “future” tv’s based on their viewer’s needs. Some good stuff.. not as good as most of what was here today but still better than the worst of it and still very memorable and part of a memorable tetralogy i’ll probably come back to when I do Tex’s birthday again next year. Not a bad note to end on though. 

Overall these shorts show just how strong a creator tex was, gleefully taking convention and ripping it to tiny pieces. As i’ve mentioned many times i’ll be coming back to his work next year.. and probably be watching a hell ofa lot more in the time between. Might even do a second special on him in between birthday ones. We’ll see how this does. The Tom and Jerry one sadly wasn’t quite the hit I hoped. 

Until then I have many other reviews. And since Today (This review is late) was supposed to be the 90′s tom and jerry movie but that turned out not to be on Max for some reason. I still plan to cover it some day i’ll just have to find it and buy it first. But tommorow if I have the time i’ll be continuing the Lena retrospective with an intresting little side trip. So until then, i’ts been a pleasure and you know what? Thanks for reading. 

#tex avery #droopy #bugs bunny #porky pig #the gold diggers of 49 #cecil turtle #tortoise beats hare #the heckling hare #tv of tommorow #dumb hounded #red hot riding hood #who killed who #red #spike #bad luck blackie #screwy squirrel #screwball squirrel #owl jolson #I love to singa

[immortalsins]

... what genre is the untamed? i literally have like. no fucking clue. sometimes the gifs make it look like a horror movie. sometimes it looks like a fantasy type thing, sometimes it looks like a romcom and sometimes it's like??? game of thrones except like. not european obviously jansjjeje. but i just watched that video, is it a comedy???? please help me i am so confused????????

DHGVCHDS bro i’m losing it that’s so funny i’m really sorry for putting so much of it on your dash-

where to begin

it’s based on a bl .... which i didn’t know when i started watching it and i’m glad i did watch it but i probably wouldn’t have had i known because the source material is. well . hmmm

the show is obviously censored so they make up for this by adding so much romantic tension its insane

to paraphrase a friend..... u hear it’s a romance and then watch it like oh i didn’t realise it was a ROMANCE romance

it has good comedy moments which are randomly and sometimes jarringly put in the middle of scenes but somehow it works 

the ridiculous comedy music from that video just cuts in out of nowhere when you least expect it and then stops the moment they decide it’s a serious show Actually 

has good horror imagery despite the terrible cgi (the only thing they can do well/have the budget for is spooky black smoke and my god do they go off with the spooky black smoke)

‘horrific scary blind girl bleeding everywhere in a foggy place called coffin city’ starts out as a comedy moment. ‘the main pair are trapped in a cave with a massive tortoise that’s also a snake and to kill it one of them has to go inside the tortoise also the english translates it as tortoise of slaughter’ is an extremely serious scene

u start watching it and think it’s going to be so bad it’s good but then it’s actually good 

the game-of-thrones-y aspects are definitely there and it’s intense but overshadowed by the romance 90% of the time

it’s the most emotional thing i’ve watched all year

this is only the surface ... the tip of the iceberg of what i could say

i don’t like romances much and i really don’t understand how this got me so invested 

idk how i found myself in this situation i blame @astorically​ and 50% of the tolkien fandom

i’m realising now i didn’t actually answer your question .... What Is The Untamed ................. historical fantasy romance (but not romance if the government asks) reverse murder mystery family drama- basically u are completely right in your analysis well done

its good i recommend 

tl;dr, yeah im confused too 

#the untamed #mdzs #asks #reedstorm #THERE IS . SO MUCH #i'm sorry about all of this u are strong for not blocking the tag tbh #side note i'm not judging anyone who likes bl/the source material its just Not my thing and would have been offputting had i known #which i didn't #and finding out was #as event

[thecommunityoftrustworthysinks]

I think you'd like The Untamed! It's a gay chinese romance (subtle enough to get by the Chinese censors, but still so cute & obvious & gay) set in a world with war, a giant tortoise that eats people, magic, political intrigue, at least 2 murder mysteries, found families, at least 4 OTPs, bards kicking ass, first crushes, the unstoppable power of rumors, plot-relevant soup, the danger of being rude to customer service, bunnies, classism, adoption, summer school, and necromancy. Not in that order.

i actually watch mo dao zu shi already! the donghua not the live action, though. i prefer that format more in general but i also have read some comparisons (and snippets of the novel) and i think i prefer how it's going about it, from what i know.

i probably don't post about it much because i don't get a ton into fandoms without like, my friends, and i don't know anyone who wants it too yet KJDFHJGFGH i also have gotten past the flashback TWICE and then got involved with life and forgot to get back to it and then forgot what was happening but i think after rewatching this time im good to go so i just need to fucking. remember. HDFKJHDGF

thanks for the ask!!

#x

[ljgfyusd]

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[aregebidan]

I think you'd like The Untamed! It's a gay chinese romance (subtle enough to get by the Chinese censors, but still so cute & obvious & gay) set in a world with war, a giant tortoise that eats people, magic, political intrigue, at least two murder mysteries, found families, at least 4 OTPs, bards kicking ass, first crushes,the unstoppable power of rumors, plot-relevant soup, literal good vs evil, bunnies, classism, adorable orphans, summer school, vengeance, and necromancy. Not in that order.

(oh god I'm so sorry I forgot to answer this!!) I've absorbed some of that show through osmosis (it seems there's a lot of Silm/Untamed fandom overlap) and it looks really epic, I'll definitely try to check it out!

#asks