I know this is probably an acquired taste but fridge journal?
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Last night, I had a bad anxiety attack that made me spiral down a dark habit hole. I am polyamorous but I also have the dark secret of having fear of abandonment issues. I was suddenly so scared that everyone was going to leave me. I decided to give my love of junk journaling a try for some art therapy. This is what I did. I've been getting a great response on Facebook and thought I'd share this as well on here since this piece is an embodiment of my emotional hell.
After taking anxiety meds, I felt a lot better. I also felt more stable after sleeping. I do have cptsd and depression/anxiety disorder. I have a lot of trauma in my past that I'm trying not to let ruin my relationships. It's a battle that's really hard. One thing I kept trying to push in my brain last night was that even a broken mosiac deserves and is worthy of love.
I've been feeling really insecure lately because of my herniated disk that's left me physically disabled. I have a hard time doing the things I used to do, and it's taking its toll on my mental health.
I feel so left out of people's lives, and it's not even anyone's fault. Not even I'm to blame. It's not like I woke up and chose this. I also didn't choose to have a traumatic childhood. Sigh. Anyway....here's to mental health awareness.
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January 25, 2023
"a companion, an adversary, an enemy, or a soulmate."
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