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meganthepagan1 · 3 months
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Finished building a catio for the kitties today. Now they have a safe outdoor space they can access anytime. They both love it already.
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meganthepagan1 · 3 months
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Made my friend’s hair half black and half peach last night.
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meganthepagan1 · 3 months
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I love this Avatar game so damn much.
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meganthepagan1 · 3 months
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Toe beans.
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meganthepagan1 · 3 months
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1•29•2024
Waiting for N to get home from work. I have no idea how tonight is going to go. I told him our dog is literally getting sick from all of the stress of us fighting for weeks. She hasn’t been eating very much for the past few days and definitely got sick overnight when I slept in another room. If that doesn’t get through to him to take it easy on drinking and be civil to me then I don’t know what will. No matter how mad we are at each other, we love our animals so much. We need to put aside our differences for them at the very least. I can’t imagine having human children in the middle of all of this.
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meganthepagan1 · 3 months
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1•28•2024
Today I prepared the guest bedroom for me to stay in while N and I are not ok. I brought in my dragonfly lamp, my journal, my book, and my favorite pillow and blanket to help me feel comfortable even though I’m not sleeping in our room anymore. I’m grateful to have a house big enough that I can make my own space when I need to, and that all of the pets are still sleeping with me. Never thought I’d have to do this though.
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meganthepagan1 · 3 months
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Nimun next to my dragon statue.
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meganthepagan1 · 3 months
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Screaming nights, silent days.
Alone but sitting right next to you, trapped but the door is unlocked.
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meganthepagan1 · 3 months
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1•21•2024
I woke up with the full intention to finish a portrait I’m working on for M today, and halfway through the day, I knew that wasn’t going to happen. I could blame it on the weather since it was overcast and gloomy, but the truth is that I always struggle with motivation and procrastination on my days off no matter what the weather is.
Instead I escaped into playing Avatar all day. I felt guilty but I justified it by telling myself I’ll get it done on my next day off. If I tell M I’m going to get it done this week, that will hold me accountable.
But damn I had a good time just playing video games in my pj’s all day.
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meganthepagan1 · 3 months
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Our new kitten is so beautiful I almost can’t stand it.
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meganthepagan1 · 3 months
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1•19•2024
Something I have always been fortunate with is friendship. I feel like I have so many great, genuine people in my life that I would consider good friends. I’ve heard that as people get older, it’s harder to to find and maintain friendships, but I feel so lucky to always have people around that aren’t flaky and actually want to be around me.
Yesterday E, R, and T came to my house and we laughed for hours. E got a new job and a new car so we celebrated her for her achievements. R had never really hung out with E and it was really cool to see them connect over so many things. I hadn’t seen T since the work Christmas party and she brought over her new puppy. My dog was thrilled and they played together the whole time. We listened to music, played a drinking game, and just had a magical time all around. I’m feeling a lot of gratitude for the people in my life.
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meganthepagan1 · 3 months
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Despite everything that’s happening, these little girls bring light to my life. I love them so much.
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meganthepagan1 · 3 months
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1•15•2024
I forgot how healing it could be to just hang out with a friend with no obligations all day.
I had some gift cards from the holidays and decided to invite one of my girl friends out to spend them with me yesterday since we were both off of work. We had never gone out like that before but it was one of the best days I’ve had in a while. She’s been going through some hard times lately as well and it felt good to take her out and treat her to free food and margaritas and then hang out at her house afterward to talk and watch funny videos.
It felt like the good old days again.
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I also got to meet her sweet fur baby which is always a bonus.
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meganthepagan1 · 3 months
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1•13•2024
I had a glimmer of hope that things were going to get better with my marriage this morning. But now, with an hour left of the day, that’s gone.
Something to think about if you meet someone very young and stay with them long term, you either grow up together or grow in different directions.
I’m done with the lifestyle of partying every day, I can’t drink and smoke the nights away with him anymore like I used to. He wants his drinking buddy back. All he cares about is having fun no matter what, everything’s a joke. The rift seems to get bigger every day.
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meganthepagan1 · 4 months
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1•12•2024
It’s been a rocky start to the new year for N and I. You’d think 17 years of being together would make communication easier. I never expected someone to understand me less the more the years go on. It feels like I am watching us drift apart from outside of my body and can’t figure out how to get back and take control.
I’ve been deep into escapism today to ease the pain. This damn new Avatar game is the best thing that’s happened to me lately. I love getting lost in it for hours. There are beers staring at me in the fridge but I’m trying not to give in. How great it would be to run around Pandora with a buzz right now. I’m trying to save them to split with N when he gets home as a sort of peace offering. We’ll see how I fare.
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meganthepagan1 · 4 months
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Got a beautiful new 6 month old kitten. She’s a lynx point Siamese and is a snuggle bug.
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meganthepagan1 · 6 months
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This is probably the weirdest but funniest show I’ve seen in a while. It was oddly comforting watching a Sasquatch navigate his way through the depths of existence and the multiverse, but had that Trailer Park Boys humor to lighten up the mood and make it relatable to the regular human. It’s been a while since I thoroughly enjoyed an adult animated show all the way through. Well done Sassy the Sasquatch.
sgnon mate it's a feature length film
youtube
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