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gaming-universe · 6 months

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How You Met || Call of Duty Preferences (1)

Authors Note: This is the first part of my Call of Duty preferences series. I had a lot of fun writing this one. So please enjoy!

Gifs by: @dustysalmon @codsona-moved @daniel-bruehl @une-femme-de-lettres @echo3one @wardencouslands @collinnmckinley @cssndra-cain

John Price

With the six months of recovery beginning to drive you insane, you felt a huge weight lift off your shoulders when Laswell called you in a few weeks early.

Her intel indicated that Al Qatala had planned an attack on Piccadilly Circus in London a few days from now, and she had no one else to call in on such short notice. When she had called, you thought that she might have wanted to meet for coffee, as the two of you usually did every week or so to escape the chaos of life. When she told you that she needed you for a mission, you jumped at the chance, anything to get you out of your stuffy house.

Informing her that you would be in London within twenty-four hours, you packed your bags and headed to the airport, where a plane was already waiting for you. Laswell had texted you all the information you needed for when you arrived in London. You would be met by the man she had put in charge of the entire operation, Captain John Price. You had heard of him in your many years of service, but you had never actually met him. But Laswell spoke highly of him, and you valued her trust in judgment.

As you stepped off the plane and onto the tarmac, your eyes landed on a black SUV parked alongside a maintenance road. Beside it stood a man: tall, arms folded across his chest, beanie on top of his head, with an impressive beard and mustache.

You recognized him from the file Laswell had sent you hours ago, and despite his seemingly warm clothing, Captain Price looked slightly cold in London's cool and overcast weather. He smiled kindly as you approached, stepping forward and extending his hand in greeting. "Lieutenant L/n, thank you for coming on such short notice..." Price spoke politely, taking your smaller hand in his larger calloused one and shaking it firmly.

You smiled up at him in return, goosebumps forming along your skin as a cool breeze blew by. You shivered, a small laugh leaving your lips as Price took your bags from your hands. "Not a problem, Captain..." you replied watching him intently as he placed your bags in the back of the car "Besides, I kind of owe Laswell for coffee last week".

Price chuckled, closing the car door and turning to face you fully. He grinned, "Let me guess, she paid for it?"

"She wouldn't let me, despite the many times I insisted. I think she still feels guilty about what happened in Mexico."

Price turned, kindly opening the passenger side door for you. "She told me about that..." he spoke lowly, looking you up and down carefully, examining your form with a slightly worried expression "...are you sure you're up for this?"

You scoffed, climbing inside the SUV with a small huff of effort. You eyed him cautiously, a stern expression that made Price freeze. "I have been cooped up in my own damn house for six months, attending mandated physical therapy for an injury that healed three months ago. I am fine. If you have any objections, you can speak to Laswell."

For a moment, your eyes met his, and you could see by his expression that he was thinking things over. Then, with a nod of his head, he closed your passenger door without hesitation.

Price took a moment to himself to release a long nervous sigh. As he walked to the driver's side, he couldn't stop thinking about how highly Laswell had spoken of you, and that you were the first person that came to her mind when he had asked for a trustworthy taskforce. He had read your file, and to say that he was impressed was an understatement. He was in awe.

You were exactly what he was looking for, and you were the exact person he needed in the fight against Al Qatala.

Kyle ‘Gaz’ Garrick

This really wasn't how you wanted your first meeting with Taskforce 141 to go.

Your morning hadn't started off well. Firstly, your alarm didn't go off, and you arrived late to Laswell's briefing. All eyes landed on you as you entered the room, heat flushing to your cheeks as you mumbled a quiet apology under your breath. As Laswell introduced you to the others, you smiled awkwardly in greeting, praying to god that after your late arrival, your day would only get better from here.

But of course, life likes to play cruel tricks. Hours after your first briefing, you dropped an entire stack of files in the hallway, the contents scattering everywhere all over the floor. After that, you got lost several times on your way to your office, cursing yourself every time you asked someone for directions. And to top it all off, the final straw in your terrible, horrible, very bad day, was spilling coffee all over yourself in the mess.

You had been hiding in the women's bathroom for the past few hours, trying desperately to scrub the coffee stain out of your blouse with some wet paper towels, but to no avail. Frustrated with yourself, and the overwhelming feeling of embarrassment sitting uncomfortably in your chest, your eyes welled with tears. As you threw the paper towel in your hands into the bin by your side, you released a long and heavy sigh. As you stared into the mirror, taking in your disheveled appearance, there was a soft knock on the door.

"Y/n? Are you in there?..." a low voice asked from the corridor, "...it's Kyle, I saw you walk in here about two hours ago, and I wanted to make sure that you were alright."

You released a small huff, your shoulders slumping as your emotions finally spilled over. You remembered Kyle from this morning, Gaz, as Price had called him. He had been so kind to you this morning after your awkward late entry and had offered you a seat next to him during the briefing. Wiping the tears from your eyes, you sniffled and cleared your throat, and replied quietly, "I'm fine. I just need a minute."

The door creaked open slightly, and you watched as Kyle's arm squeezed through the crack in the door, a blue sweater clutched in his hand. "I uh, I have a jumper here if you want it. I saw what happened in the mess and thought you might want something to cover up that coffee stain."

A small feeling of gratefulness welled inside your chest as you approached the door, taking the sweater from his hand with a small 'thank you'. As you pulled the sweater over your head and placed your arms through the arm holes you opened the door and stepped back out into the corridor. You met Kyle's eyes with a grateful smile, "You didn't have to do that" You spoke softly, biting your lip as you folded your arms across your chest. He shrugged, leaning against the wall casually "It's fine, you looked kind of distressed, so I wanted to make sure you weren't having some sort of panic attack".

You laughed, "I was getting there, but that's unrelated for now" You replied, before groaning and burying your head in your hands. "Today has been the worst day of my life. I look like a fucking mess, and I've embarrassed myself too many times today."

Kyle chuckled, "Everyone has bad days Y/n, trust me. Yours isn't the worst I've seen."

"Oh really?" You questioned.

"I watched Soap fall flat on his face during a training exercise last week. He just laid there while we laughed."

You couldn't stop the loud laughter that left your lips, your hands instantly flying to your mouth as Kyle smirked. "Oh no..." you exclaimed "...that must have been awful."

"It was for him..." Kyle shrugged "but it was fucking hilarious."

The two of you continued to exchange funny stories, until Ghost appeared at the other end of the corridor, calling for the two of you as a mission had been assigned to the 141 by Shepherd. Kyle gave you a small smile, before motioning with his head for you to follow. "I'll tell you what, after this mission, I'll buy you an actual coffee. I know a nice place off base."

You smiled brightly, nodding your head in agreement. "I'll hold you to that, Garrick."

Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley

He had been staring at you from across the room since you had arrived.

You had no idea what was wrong with him, or what his apparent problem with you was, but you chose to focus on Price's briefing instead. It was very off-putting, especially since this was your first mission with Taskforce 141. Laswell had recruited you at Price's request. Impressed with your skills and your file, she agreed with him that you would be a perfect addition to the team, and that you would also bring a little balance and reason when needed.

Noticing your slight discomfort, Johnny or Soap' MacTavish moved to stand beside you, sending a warning glare towards his friend cautiously.

"Does he normally glare at every new person that works with you guys?" You whispered, looking up at Johnny beside you with a questioning expression. He shrugged, "Not usually, it's putting me off as well, don't worry. I'll talk to him once this is over."

"Don't you think I should? If I've done something I want to know what exactly is pissing him off."

Johnny hummed lowly in response, turning his attention back to Price. "Only if you want to. If I had to guess, it might be because he doesn't know you. He hasn't worked with you before, so he's trying to size you up." You bit your lip anxiously, releasing an uneasy sigh as you folded your arms across your chest. "No, I know what being sized up feels like. This is something different."

He was examining you from head to toe, trying to determine whether or not you have what it takes to become part of the task force. So maybe Johnny was right, maybe Ghost was sizing you up in his own way. And you weren't going to let him intimidate you, even though it was kind of working.

The second you entered the room, Simon froze. It wasn't something that usually happened, he wasn't always lost for words. He had read your file, thanks to Laswell and Price, and he was impressed by your skills. Seeing you in person, however, there was just something about you that made him feel...strange. It was a good kind of strange, something that he hadn't felt in a long time.

Once Price had finished his briefing, you watched as Ghost pushed away from his position on the wall, and immediately stalked out of the room. You turned to look at Price, who was already looking at you with a confused expression.

You sighed, "It's me, isn't it? I'm the problem?"

Price shrugged. "I don't know, but he'll warm up to you. He just needs some time."

Your gaze fell to the table as you sat quietly in thought. You hoped that this would all work out, especially since you and Ghost would be working together for the foreseeable future.

John ‘Soap’ MacTavish

"Have you met either of them before?" Alejandro asked, the two of you jumping out of the truck and stepping onto the tarmac, watching as the large plane landed on the runway ahead.

You shrugged as you moved to stand in front of the truck, leaning against the bullbar. "I've worked with Ghost a few times. As for Sargeant MacTavish, this would be the first."

Alejandro chuckled, "I suppose you all work under Laswell, eh?"

"You suppose correctly, although it has been some time since I've worked with a familiar face" You replied, smirking teasingly as Alejandro turned to face you, an expression of mock hurt on his features. "Am I not good enough company!?" he shouted over the sound of the plane's engines, throwing his arms out in an exaggerated manner.

You laughed loudly in reply, "You know I love you!"

Alejandro smirked back at you, before turning back to face the now-lowered plane ramp. You watched from afar as two men descended the ramp, the skull mask clearly visible even from this distance. You watched as Alejandro and Ghost spoke with each other, while the younger, unfamiliar man watched them intently.

His gaze turned towards you and you smiled kindly in greeting.

John froze. He couldn't take his eyes off you. Simon had mentioned that they were going to work with an old colleague of his, but he didn't mention that you were absolutely gorgeous. Whatever Simon and Alejandro were talking about now fell on deaf ears as he watched you give him a small wave.

Wow, Simon has been holding out on me.

A sharp jab to the ribs from his left brought John out of his daze, turning his attention towards Simon who was already glaring at him. "She will eat you alive" He warned sternly, knowing John's exact train of thought.

"What are you saying exactly?" John challenged, eyeing the Lieutenant with a smirk.

A deep chuckle came from his right, John turning to see Alejandro shaking his head. "He means exactly that, my friend. She's fierce. I'm tempted to ask Laswell to permanently assign her to the Vaqueros."

"Good luck with that..." Simon snapped lightly "Price won't allow her to leave that easily-"

"Are you guys done deciding my life and career for me!?"

All three men turned their gaze to see you standing a few feet away, arms folded over your chest and a knowing smirk on your lips.

They all froze, eyes wide as you approached. Eyeing them individually, you motioned with your head towards the truck behind you. "We have something more important than my life to discuss. You know better than that, Simon". John watched on in shock as Simon's gaze lowered to the ground, mumbling a quick 'sorry' under his breath as he moved to walk past you, heading towards the truck without another word. Alejandro followed, keeping his gaze downward as he too walked back to the truck.

As you rolled your eyes, your attention turned to him, John's entire body tensing. "You must be Sargeant MacTavish..." You spoke politely, extending your hand in greeting, "I'm Y/n."

"So I've heard..." He replied, taking your hand in his "...but please, call me Johnny." The smile that formed on your face took his breath away, the mischievous glint in your eyes doing something to him that he couldn't quite understand.

"Well, Johnny. Just so you know, I make my own decisions around here. The sooner you learn that, we'll get along just fine."

As you turned and walked away, joining Simon and Alejandro back at the truck, John released a long breath and mumbled lowly. "Oh fuck, I'm in so much trouble."

Alex Keller

Throughout the entire briefing, Alex couldn't keep his eyes off you.

Farah had informed him that Captain Price was sending one of his best man, or rather, woman, to help their effort against Al Qatala in Al Mazrah. Farah had been excited about your arrival. You had been with Price when Farah was rescued, and ever since then, she has considered you to be a sister.

She trusts you with her life, and that was good enough for Alex.

He watched you speak with Farah about the next move for her forces, and how you expertly dealt with the situation when Farah protested about laying low.

"If we lay low now, we lose the advantage-"

"And if we attack, there's a chance that they will be waiting for us" you countered, looking between her and himself with a calm ease. With your gaze moving back to Farah, you continued "You attacked two huge targets before I got here. If you attack a third, there is a chance that they are already anticipating us."

"But we have them right where we want them-"

"That may be so, Farah, but you're not listening to me..." You began again, a clear look of exasperation on your features.

Alex could see that you were very tired, and despite obviously being at the end of your tether, you still managed to remain calm. He had to do something.

"She's right, Farah..." Alex interjected, eyeing her with a warning glare, "she came here to help us, so maybe we should listen to her."

The grateful look on your features caused a strange feeling to form in his chest, your tired eyes conveying a small 'thank you' as you turned back to face Farah. She released a long sigh, her shoulders slumping in defeat. She met your gaze with a small nod.

"Alright, you have a point. Come find me if Price or Laswell call" She spoke lowly, leaving the room with her head lowered.

Your eyes moved to focus on Alex once more, sighing heavily as you closed your eyes and pinched the bridge of your nose. "Thanks for stepping in there, you didn't have to."

Alex chuckled. "You did have a good point, and you were right. Another attack would have been too risky." He watched you nod in agreement, sighing once again as you rubbed your eyes, stifling a yawn.

Alex found a small grin forming on his lips as he moved to stand up from his seat. "Long flight?" he asked, moving around the table to stand beside you. You nodded again "From one warzone to another..." you chuckled, "I'm a bit exhausted, yes. But I'll manage-"

"No offense, Lieutenant, but you're not going to be much help if you're sleep-deprived" Alex spoke plainly, finding himself enjoying the sound of your loud laughter, as it echoed throughout the room. "Good point, I won't argue with a few hours of sleep" you answered, giving him a genuine though tired smile before leaving the room, and heading for your quarters.

Alex watched you leave and found himself muttering a low 'shit' under his breath, before exiting the room and walking down the opposite end of the hallway.

Alejandro Vargas

Yes, the cartel was becoming more versatile, but why Laswell was choosing to assign a DEA agent to his command was beyond him.

Laswell spoke very highly of you and promised that you would be perfect for the job. That didn't mean that he had to like you. He watched you from across the room as you spoke to Rudy. He was smiling down at you, and you were smiling up at him. You were getting along with all of his men, and it was pissing him off.

His men adored you, and Rudy adored you. And he...who was he kidding, you were fucking gorgeous.

There was no way that he would admit it out loud, he couldn't. He could see you looking at him from the corner of your eye, the glare on your expression causing his jaw to clench. You were doing something to him, and he hadn't spoken a single word to you yet.

You held Alejandro's gaze, watching as his jaw clenched, and noticing how his shoulders tensed. Since you stepped off that plane, you've felt like he hated your guts. It was an uncomfortable feeling, your stomach twisting uneasily as you refused to be the first one to look away.

"Please tell me that he isn't going to look at me like that the entire time I'm here" You muttered lowly, as Rudy followed your line of sight.

You saw movement in your peripherals, as Rudy moved closer to your side. "He won't. I'll make sure of it" he spoke lowly, his tone directed to his friend across the room. Feeling slightly relieved as Alejandro dropped his gaze to the floor, you sighed and turned to face the man beside you.

Rudy was already staring at you, a small grimace on his features as he huffed. "I'm sorry about him, he's usually more welcoming than this" he apologized, moving to stand in front of you and blocking your view of Alejandro. You shrugged your shoulders, pressing your lips together in a thin line, "I'm guessing I'm not what you guys were expecting?" You asked awkwardly, almost afraid to know the answer.

Rudy chuckled softly, meeting your nervous gaze with a kind smile. "He was expecting Laswell to send someone we knew, someone like Ghost or Soap. Hell, we didn't even know that Laswell had contacts in the DEA."

"She doesn't, I'm the only one..." You answered, grinning as Rudy's eyes widened in shock "...I used to work for her, but I got hurt on a mission and was honorably discharged. She helped me get a job with the DEA, and I owed her a favor."

Rudy nodded, an impressed look on his face. You could just see Alejandro over Rudy's shoulder, his glare softer this time, but still menacing nonetheless.

You felt your chest tighten, as you held his gaze once more, a feeling that made your heart skip a beat. Why? You had no idea. You weren't going to let this man get the better of you, no matter how dangerously attractive he was.

Rudolfo Para

Stepping off the plane, you took a deep breath in and sighed heavily. While the air in Mexico was humid, it was much better than the stuffy air on board the cargo plane.

Once down the ramp, and after you had stepped onto the tarmac, you were met by Alejandro. "Thank you for coming on such short notice..." He spoke kindly, leading you towards the awaiting truck only a few feet away, "if Hassan is moving as fast as Laswell claims, we're going to need all the help we can get."

"I'm happy to help. Besides, having me with you will help if he manages to cross the border" You replied, looking over at Alejandro with a nonchalant shrug of your shoulders. He chuckled lowly "Hopefully we will catch him before it comes to that."

As you approached the truck, you noticed a man standing beside the passenger door, arms folded over his chest as he watched the two of you approach. When his eyes met yours, you noticed that his entire demeanor changed. His eyes widened as he stood up straight, brushing invisible lint from his clothes as both you and Alejandro stopped in front of him.

"Y/n, I would like you to meet my best man, Rudolfo Para" Alejandro introduced, the two of you shaking hands.

Smiling innocently, you looked up at Rudolfo with a kind expression. "Nice to meet you, Rudolfo."

"Please, call me Rudy..." He spoke happily, a small nervous laugh escaping him as he pulled his hand away "...we appreciate you coming out here to help us."

"Not a problem, Rudy. I've been tracking Hassan for months, there's no way that I would miss this" You answered, your smile widening before you climbed inside the awaiting truck.

When the truck door closed, Rudy released a long, shaky breath. His eyes met Alejandro's, who was already smirking knowingly at him. His best friend knew him too well and could read him like an open book, the bright flushed redness to his cheeks aside.

"I know that look..." Alejandro teased, his smirk growing wider and more menacing "...though I can't blame you, she's gorgeous-"

"That's enough out of you" Rudy snapped, punching his friend's shoulder as Alejandro laughed darkly.

"Oh come on, don't deny it-"

"I'm not denying anything-"

"You were like a deer in headlights" Alejandro chuckled, mocking Rudy with an exaggerated wide-eyed expression.

With an embarrassed groan, Rudy clambered into the passenger side of the truck all the while trying to hide his bright red face from you. As Alejandro sat in the driver's seat, you cleared your throat awkwardly from the back seat.

"Hey boys, if you're going to talk about someone...make sure they don't speak the same language."

Rudy felt his heart stop.

Phillip Graves

You couldn't take your eyes off him.

In all your years of working with Laswell and being part of Taskforce 141, you had never heard of Shadow Company or Phillip Graves. The fact that they were brought in by General Shepherd made you suspicious enough, but the man did save your life via an airstrike on your mission to find Hassan, so maybe he wasn't all that bad. As a bonus, he was incredibly attractive.

You watched Graves interrogate Hassan before it was decided by Shepherd and Laswell that he had to be let go. Your jaw clenched as Shepherd gave the order, before Graves closed the laptop on the hood of the truck to your side. You heard him swear under his breath, his jaw clenching in annoyance as he turned to watch Ghost and Soap release Hassan.

"We were so fucking close" he growled, folding his arms over his chest and glaring at Hassan's retreating figure. You nodded, sighing heavily as you shrugged. "We'll get another chance..." You spoke plainly, turning your head toward him "I don't know when that will be, but I'm hoping we do."

Graves huffed a short laugh, his eyes meeting yours as he pressed his lips together in a line. "Oh we will, he's not getting off that easy" he spoke matter-of-factly, moving closer to you and staring down at you "Though I'm a bit pissed that we went through all that trouble for nothing."

"That is sometimes the job..." You laughed "Not everything goes to plan."

Graves nodded, giving you a kind smile. The two of you stood in silence for a moment, the only noise being that of the desert at night, and the voices of Ghost and Soap only a few feet away.

As heat crept onto your cheeks, you cleared your throat awkwardly. "I uh, I don't think we've actually met in person..." You spoke lightly, "I'm Y/n."

"Phillip Graves..." the man beside you replied, smirking down at you with a playful expression, "I'm glad that I can finally put a face to a name. Especially one I rescued."

It was your turn to laugh, "I appreciate it, really. Though I think an airstrike is pretty extravagant."

"Oh, I don't call in an airstrike for just anyone..." Phillip shrugged, "but I figured I should make a good first impression."

You blushed a bright red as you laughed, shaking your head at his bold and flirtatious tone. It made your stomach backflip and your heart skip a beat. Maybe it was his accent, or maybe it was the way he was practically undressing you with his eyes.

There was an immediate tension forming between the two of you, one that caused your breathing to stutter, and your legs to-

"Oi! You two, let's go!" Ghost called out to the two of you, forcing both you and Phillip out of your bubble of sexual tension. Clearing your throat, you avoided Phillips's eyes as you immediately turned on your heel, making a beeling for your two teammates.

Phillip watched you walk away and muttered under his breath. "Fuck, this is going to be difficult."

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mockerycrow · 1 year

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Soap Kiss Headcanons

GIF BY @une-femme-de-lettres - masterlist

Soap tends to kiss you excitedly and sweetly, causing clashing teeth and giggles to admit from both of you.

He’s usually in a rush to do something, so it’s a lot of quick and sweet kisses, barely the brush of the lips.

When he can take his time, he likes to kiss you slowly and sweetly. Nothing too deep, but just enough to get your shoulders to relax and for that tension in your brow line to finally dissipate. He cups the back of your neck whenever he kisses you and you love it; you love being surrounded by him.

His lips are soft but you still get beard burn if you kiss for too long. You don’t really mind.

When Soap is feeling needy, you immediately know. The hand on the back of your head twitches against your hair and skin, the other hand tightening on your waist. He presses his lips harder than he usually does in a desperate way, a noise of panic leaving him every time you need to pull away for air.

Heavily panting, your noses touching, you can’t help but ask; “Are you trying to suffocate me?”

Soap laughs breathlessly and shakes his head, saying “More like tryin’ to get’ya to suffocate me, sweet’art.”

Soap falls apart whenever you kiss him first, especially when you catch him by surprise. He loves when you grab him by the front of his shirt and press your lips against his. He groans every time and cups the back of your head, his jaw relaxing open as sometimes, yes, you do like to kiss with tongue. Soap melts every time you do.

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thewriterg · 7 months

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𝐂𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐦𝐞 𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐭

pairing(s); simon ‘ghost’ riley x afab!reader, john ‘soap’ mactavish x afab!reader, task force 141 x afab!reader

summary; You and Ghost weren’t the least bit pleased when you both were roped into Soaps shenanigans for a costume contest but deep down you’d do anything to see the smile on his face —flufftober day;1—

word count; 1.3k+

warnings(s); readers call sign is “coma”, soap having two of the most deadliest soldiers worldwide wrapped around his finger, and language

A/n:—GIFs; @silenthqll & @une-femme-de-lettres— OCTOBER IS HERE WRITERS‼️

“C’mon Hen it’s just dress up for one night” Soap pouted following behind you as you made your way to the cafeteria as you denied him for the seventh time in a day over the same thing he was prominent as hell over dressing up in matching costumes for Halloween and of course reasonably you declined

“Johnny, darling. You’re gonna drive me mad go sit down with Simon I’ll be there in a few” With a small huff the Scot was storming away with the attitude of a toddler as you stood in line for you alls lunch

Ghost perked up from his cup of tea in the furthest table in the cafeteria his chair against the wall as he watched the Scot approach him muttering things to himself with his arms crossed over his chest before sitting in his usual chair with a huff and before Simon could even humor himself in asking him what was wrong the Scot was already rambling of his troubles to the Brit

“You think it’s reasonable aye?” He spoke with a roll of his eyes while Ghost huffed mirroring his actions before grumbling under his breath his voice gruff and deep

“Sure MacTavish”

Soon you were walking towards the booth two trays of food in your hand setting them down gently in front of the men and taking your own seat nothing but a cup of coffee in your grasp as you had sparing right after and preferred to not vomit on your to save yourselves the trouble settling in your chair with a grunt as moments of silence passed you all Ghosts mask lifted below the tip of his nose so he could eat

“You know Ghost thinks it’s a good idea if we dress up” Soap stated suddenly causing the war criminal to clear his throat trying not to choke on the food in his mouth as you peered over you cup of coffee looking the Scot in the eye you gaze sharp like a siren as you hummed

“Is that so?” Your gaze adverted to the Brit who looked at you with blown pupils you had to learn how to read Simon since he pledged his face being covered like the plague but the main starter note you could give to anyone in need?

That man had more expressive eyes than a mime

“Come on love, you know the mutt it putting us against each other” It took everything in you not to chuckle or at least crack a smirk at the look he’d given Soap as if he wanted his head on a chopping block which he looked like he didn’t have an ounce of regret for the interrogation he caused and running out of options he pulled his last stunt

was is it petty? maybe

would it get his point across? absolutely

“It was jus’ a thought don’t worry too much ‘bout it” The Scott mumbled standing from his seat before taking his tray of half eaten food and walking away from the table with a drag of his feet causing you and Ghost to glance at each other little did you know that was just the beginning

💌💌💌💌

For the rest of the day the Scott was unusually quiet and only spoke when spoken to you picked up on the behavior quick and you weren’t stupid you knew that he was trying to manipulate you but you were sick of watching him sulk like a kicked puppy so when Soap had got up to leave the meeting room you threw a glance to Simon who stealthily followed in your footsteps as you went to go corner the Scott in the comfort of your shared chambers that had took too much paper work and a white lie with the help of Price about being married for you all to get to share a room and become each others next of kin

With non faltering steps and long strides you had made it to your room in a mere minute slipping through the door with no regard to see Soap standing putting on what looked to be his loungewear switching from the army print cargo pants, long sleeve compression shirt, and steel toe boots to grey sweatpants, a white wife beater, and thick socks

“Ye need somethin’ Bonnie?” The Scott mumbled looking to you with a tinge of mock sadness in the back of his throat that had Ghost rolling his eyes at the sight from towering behind you

“Stop mopin’ Johnny I’ll wear the damn costume” The words slipped pass the cloth of his balaclava into the air of your room accent prominent, voice gruff, and eyes annoyed and the Scott was as bright as ever again before his eyes adverted to you staring at him with a deadpan expression and before he could even start with his puppy dog expressions you were already nodding your head with the roll of your eyes

To say the Soap was ecstatic was an understatement and you began to regret your decision fairly quickly when he went on an hour long rant about what he wanted to dress up as and a even longer rant when you and Simon had no idea what ‘Mr and Mrs Smith’ was

So you had spent majority of your night watching the film with hushed giggles and laughter whenever Ghost would complain about the quality of the fight scenes which was fairly advanced for the time in the early 2000s But lt didn’t fail to amuse you when the blonde scoffed before muttering something like

“Amateurs”

“Yeah draw even slower you bloody daft”

But you had fortunately got through the movie in one piece before coming to the realization that

youd need two suits and a dress

💌💌💌💌

“Here comes the life of the party yea!?” Gaz announced as You, Ghost, and Soap walked towards the table everyone in the pub dressed up as a different range of characters you rolled your eyes at him a hint of playfulness in the mix of your eyes and before you could speak Gaz was gasping

“You didn’t!” The smirk on Johnny’s face was prominent as he wiped non existent dust off the shoulder of his black suit jacket identical to Simon’s who meekly huffed at the brunette as you smirked a fitted black dress against your body heels standing strong against the sticky bar floor and topping the look in the visible slit of your dress was a thigh holster that held a pistol that may or may not have been real identical to the ones in the belt of your partners

“You’ve done it” Gaz cheered along side Soap probably a few drink in dressed in slacks with a white button down that had blood staining the collar prosthetic fangs creating a small lisp when he spoke while Price shook his head at the sight of his two youngest recruits on their way to get a round for the first table the Captain himself dressed in jeans, a flannel, brown boots and a matching cowboy hat to match it was a sight for sure

You and Simon had took a seat in the booth making sure it was room for Johnny when he’d returned as you listened to Ghost tease your captain on his costume choice which caused a mock roasting session amongst them both as you held back the laughter in your throat

“Dinnae tell me party’s already started” The strong accent evaded your ears as a round of shots were placed in front of all of you

“As if anyone you forgot about you” Your voice carried sarcasm and the Scott just grinned in response before taking a Drink and toast it up which you were all soon to follow before downing it in one go

As you and Simon looked at each other you knew you were ruined

#simon ghost riley #ghost x reader #john soap mactavish #soap x reader #ghost x soap #ghost x soap x roach #cod x reader #spooktober #flufftober #angstober #kinktober #romance #fluff #fem!reader #2023 #i love you #thewriterg

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kilfeur · 3 months

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Agares et Kerori sont bien d'accord sur le fait d'aider leurs proches mais pas forcément un inconnu si ils avaient fait leur demande. Je pensais pas revoir Zeze mais j'avais bien aimé comment ils montraient qu'ils dévoraient des lettres d'amour. Pour comprendre comment construire une personnage, Zeze les dirige vers leur grand frère qui évalue déjà leur compétence d'écriture en les mangeant. Curieuse de voir comment il va les évaluer par la suite.

Agares and Kerori agree to help their loved ones, but not necessarily a stranger if they had asked. I didn't think I'd see Zeze again, but I liked the way they showed how they devoured love letters. To understand how to build a character, Zeze directs them to his older brother, who is already assessing their writing skills by eating them. I'm curious to see how he evaluates them next.

#mairimashita! iruma kun #mairimashita manga #m!ik #m!ik spoilers #asmodeus alice #agares picero #gaap goemon #clara valac #silvia sabnock #zeze zepar #zoui zepar #suzuki iruma #crocell kerori #crocell chima

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lady-de-mon-coeur · 10 months

Note

Hello! Do you have ml fanfic recommendations? Well written english or French and ft romance? Thank you!

Hey there, lovely anon! If I get your ask right, you wanted romance-focused fic recs, didn’t you? So here you go.

First of all,

french recs

Juste un baiser by @mind3ll

Tout avait commencé par une innocente discussion entre Rose et Mylène, et qui aurait parfaitement pu n'avoir aucune conséquence. Du moins, jusqu'à ce que Chloé s'en mêle. Puis Alix. Puis Alya.

Et que la question de qui avait déjà embrassé quelqu'un se trouve soudain au centre de toutes les conversations.

Le battement d'ailes du Papillon by @miraculous-floconfettis

- Ladybug, viens vite, j'ai trouvé le repère du Papillon !

A l'autre bout du fil, le cœur de Ladybug manqua un battement. Chat Noir avait trouvé la tanière de leur ennemi ! Mais lorsque son coéquipier reprit la parole, les mots qu'il prononça lui glacèrent le sang.

- Viens le plus vite possible au manoir Agreste. Dépêche-toi, je t'en supplie.

A very accurate depiction of Adrien processing his trauma after finding out Hawk Moth’s true identity. Lots of hurt/comfort, fluff and Adrinette being a married couple without even realising it.

Trouve-moi si tu peux and Embrasse-moi si tu peux by @mind3ll

Adrien jubilait.

Il avait enfin l'opportunité de découvrir qui se cachait derrière l'identité de Ladybug.

Et en tout bien tout honneur, histoire de couronner le tout. Tout ça grâce à un petit jeu entre eux, un simple jeu qu'il avait initié sans trop y croire.

Détransformation de choc by Alixe

Un combat qui finit un peu brutalement, une relation qui peine à se mettre en place, un père qui s'en mêle... La vie de héros n'est pas toujours facile.

Doux chantage by Jade DeTour

Un soir, Chat Noir découvre le secret de l'identité de Ladybug ainsi que l'identité de celui qu'elle aime. Il demande trois rendez-vous en échange de son silence. Ladynoir, Marichat et Adrinette avec un peu de Ladrien.

Éclosion by ElinaLT

Marinette reçoit une fleur et une lettre, d'un mystérieux 'admirateur secret' comme l'appelle Alya. Elles cherchent désespérément de qui il pourrait s'agir... la découverte s'annonce pleine de surprises.

I never get tired of recommending this fic. It’s just so sweet and heartwarming. Please consider giving it a try, even if you’re not into Marichat.

English

I'll Guess Your Heart, If You Guess Mine by PurpleHeartsOne

When Chat Noir stumbles upon Marinette holding her kwami, Tikki, he finally figures out that his lady, the girl he loves, is none other than his classmate Marinette Dupain-Cheng. Marinette is terrified that he's figured out, and she's not ready to know who he really is, since she's a firm believer that their identities should be hidden and is scared of the consequences if their identities are revealed. As a compromise, Chat Noir decides to set up a deal, he'll give Marinette three chances to guess who he really is underneath the mask, and if she doesn't guess right, he won't reveal himself. But Chat Noir has full faith that his lady will be able to guess who he is.

A story about Chat Noir falling in love with who his lady is, and Marinette falling in love with Chat and easing her worries about the identity reveal.

A multi-chapter set in s4. A must-read imo.

It's You by @inner-sakura

She’d gone through this exact moment a million times in her head. Imagined dramatically declaring her love and having him passionately reciprocate. She’d spent hours picturing the way his green eyes would soften and warm as he too declared his undying love for her, before sweeping her off her feet and carrying her off into the sunset. The fantasy always ended this way, the two of them madly in love.

It never ended with Adrien gazing at her blankly, his face smooth and expressionless.

[AU where Marinette succeeds in confessing to Adrien after the events of Frozer, and everything devolves from there.]

Too much angst, hurt and comfort in this two-shot.

Kiss shy by @emsylcatac

Marinette was on a mission. Three weeks into an impromptu reveal, the same three weeks into a relationship with her partner. And yet, they still hadn’t kissed. She didn’t know how much more she could take.

So tonight, she would kiss him. Right on the mouth.

I just love these precious beans.

rumour has it by summerset

When Alya reveals to the class that Marinette kissed Chat Noir, Adrien is very confused. Why would Marinette lie about kissing him? He decides to take matters into his own hands, and make the rumour a reality.

A Timely Reveal by LiquifiedStars

Adrien realised that having kissed Marinette as Chat Noir was now causing him complications with his now Girlfriend. His attempt to reveal himself however is interrupted when a girl suddenly falls through a portal, and she looks curiously like him. Written for the Miraculous Fanworks Discord.

I know I recommended this fic too many times before and I’ll do it again. Just read it.

wax lips to wax lips by @ladyofthenoodle

Adrien has been struggling to make sense of Marinette for a long time now, but today is especially confusing. Between Nino’s panicked hedging and Marinette’s own verbal gymnastics, he feels like he’s been whipped around by Ladybug’s yo-yo and tied up in knots.

Still, he isn’t going to let some confusion get in the way of their friendship.

Even if things have just gotten really, really confusing.

(it's the statue scene, from Adrien's point of view!)

Seven Seconds by alvares715

Adrien finds a lost video on his phone.

Set in season four.

Episode “Felix” aftermath. Very angsty fic. Another one must-read imo.

Accidentally Not In Love by Lucid

Marinette confesses to Adrien and he rejects her. It takes him less than 24 hours to realize he's made a huge mistake.

Can't Help Falling For You by FelicisMagic18873

Ladybug decides to talk Chat out of his crush for her by making him realize that he might end up not liking who she was behind the mask. It decidedly goes out of hand pretty quickly.

Very sweet one-shot, you can literally feel Chat Noir’s love for Ladybug through the words.

Thank you for your ask, anon! Hope you found something to read. Happy reading!

#my asks #anon ask #ml fic recs #ml season 5 spoilers

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pegasusdrawnchariots · 6 days

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Lettre V

@ninadove here's another one for ya :)

This one was hard to split up! M de Bergerac is not a fan of full stops lol

I had trouble in 3F specifically with the use of "ne". I believe it has something to do with the role of "ſoupçonnerois" but I wasn't confident enough to rule on if it was affirmative or negative either way 😅

4F also has a historical reference that may be lost on me, hopefully u can shed some light on it! My thanks again for yr invaluable help 💌

1F MADAME,

Suis je condamné de pleurer encore bien long-temps? Hé je vous prie, ma belle Maiſtreſſe, au nom de vôtre bon Ange, faites-moy cette amitié, de découvrir là-deſſus vôtre intention, afin que j'aille de bonne heure retenir place aux Quinze Vingts parce que je prévoy que de vôtre courtoiſie, je ſuis predeſtiné à mourir aveugle, Oüy aveugle (car vôtre ambition ne ſe contenteroit pas que je fuſſe ſimplement borgne.)

1A MADAM,

Am I condemned to cry much longer still? Oh, I beg you, my beautiful Mistress, in the name of your good Angel, be kind enough to reveal your intention up there, that I may go in time to reserve a place in the Quinze-Vingts Ophthalmology Hospital because I predict that from your courtesy, I am predestined to die blind — yes, blind (because your ambition would not be content for me to be simply one-eyed).

2F N'avez-vous pas fait deux alambics de mes deux yeux, par où vous avez trouvé l'invention de diſtiler ma vie, & de la convertir en eau toute claire?

2A Have you not made two stills out of my two eyes, by which you have found the invention of distilling my life and converting it into clearest water?

3F En verité, je ſoupçonnerois (ſi ma mort vous eſtoit utile, & ſi ce n'eſtoit la ſeule choſe que je ne puis obtenir de voſtre pitié) que vous n'épuiſiez ces ſources d'eau, qui ſont chez moy, que pour me bruſler plus facilement; & je commence d'en croire quelque choſe, depuis que j'ay pris garde, que plus mes yeux tirent d'humide de mon coeur, plus il bruſle:

3A In truth, I would suspect (if my death were useful to you, and if it [[[wasn't]]] the only thing that I [[[can]]] obtain from your mercy) that you drain these sources of water within me in order to burn me more easily. And I'm starting to believe something of it, since I'm wary, that the more my eyes draw moisture from my heart, the more it burns.

4F Il faut bien dire que mon Pere ne forma pas mon corps du meſme argile, dont celuy du premier homme fut compoſé, mais qu'il le tailla ſans doute d'une pierre de chaux, puis que l'humidité des larmes que je répands m'a tantoſt conſommé: Mais conſommé, croiriez-vous bien, Madame, de quelle façon? je n'oſerois plus marcher dans les ruës embraſé comme je ſuis, que les enfans ne m'environnent de fuſées, parce que je leur ſemble une figure échappée d'un feu d'artifice, ny à la Campagne, qu'on ne me prenne pour un de ces Ardens, qui traiſnent les Gens à la riviere.

4A It must be said that my Father did not form my body from the same clay that comprised the first man but that he doubtless sculpted it from limestone, since the humidity of the tears that I shed has [[[soon]]] consumed me. But, would you believe, Madam, consumed me how? I would no longer dare walk through the streets inflamed as I am, lest the children surround me with rockets, since to them I seem a figure escaped from a firework — nor to the country, lest they take me for one of these [[[Ardens]]] that drag people to the river.

5F Enfin vous pouvez connoiſtre tout ce que cela veut dire; c'eſt, ſi vous ne revenez bien-toſt, vous entendrez dire à voſtre retour, quand vous demanderez où je demeure, que je demeure aux Tuilleries, & que mon nom c'eſt la beſte à feu qu'on fait voir aux Badauts pour de l'argeut. Alors vous ſerez bien honteuſe, d'avoir un Amant Salemandre, & le regret de voir bruſler dés ce Monde,

MADAME,

Voftre Serviteur.

5A At last, you can know what all this means — if you return soon, you will hear it said, when you ask where I reside, that I reside in the Tuileries, and that my name is the fire beast that they show to onlookers for money. Then you will be quite ashamed to have a salamander lover, and the regret of seeing burning [[[from]]] this world,

MADAM,

your servant.

#ninadove

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empiredesimparte · 11 months

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Hortense: What's the matter, Louis? Aren't you getting ready for the evening? Napoléon V: I still have a few files to read and sign. I've received a letter from King Alexander of Scotland Hortense: Is there a problem?

Napoléon V: No, no, it's just that everything has gone so fast since Papa died… It's as if I were living another life. Hortense: I understand you. I feel that way too

Hortense : Why did you ask me to come? For the letter? Napoléon V : Yes. I want to be frank with you: Oliver's father would like to discuss a formal engagement between you and Oliver.

Napoléon V: I have nothing against it, naturally. But it can't happen now, you know that, don't you?

Hortense: Louis… Napoléon V: I'm sorry, you know that. I'm doing this for you too. I wouldn't want my next ceremonies to overshadow yours. And that would be too costly for the Crown

Hortense: That's not the point, Louis Napoléon V (annoyed): I'm going to say yes to the King, but you'll have to wait until it's official. That's the way it is. I'm not against you

Hortense: I don't care if the event is overshadowed by your coronation, all I want is to be with Oliver. Everyone knows it now, it's stupid to…

Napoléon V (angry): You haven't behaved well enough lately, I don't want to risk any more shameful magazine headlines over trifles. You promised me at Compiègne to…

Hortense : That's not fair, Louis! Uncle Henri told me everything that happened in Cannes, and on the yacht with Charlotte. Don't talk to me about behaviour after that! Charlotte isn't… Napoléon V : That's enough! That's enough of that! We'll talk about it another time, leave me alone!

⚜ Le Cabinet Noir | Yacht impérial l'Aigle, 9 Prairial An 230

Beginning ▬ Previous ▬ Next

⚜ Traduction française

Hortense : Qu'y a-t-il Louis ? Tu ne t'apprêtes pas pour la soirée ? Napoléon V : J'ai encore quelques dossiers à lire et signer. J'ai reçu une lettre du roi Alexander d'Ecosse Hortense : Il y a un problème ?

Napoléon V : Non, non, seulement tout va si vite depuis la mort de Papa... C'est comme si je vivais une autre vie Hortense : Je te comprends. Moi aussi je ressens ça

Hortense : Pourquoi m'as-tu fait venir ? Pour la lettre ? Napoléon V : Oui. Je veux être franc avec toi : le père d'Oliver aimerait discuter de fiançailles officielles, entre toi et Oliver

Napoléon V : Je n'ai rien contre, naturellement. Mais ça ne peut pas se passer maintenant, tu le sais bien, n'est-ce pas ?

Hortense : Louis... Napoléon V : Je suis désolé, tu le sais. Je le fais aussi pour vous. Je ne voudrais pas que mes prochaines cérémonies éclipsent les tiennes. Et cela serait trop coûteux pour la Couronne

Hortense : Ce n'est pas la question, Louis Napoléon V (agacé) : Je vais répondre positivement au roi, seulement, il vous faudra attendre d'officialiser. C'est ainsi. Je ne suis pas contre vous

Hortense : Je me fiche que l'événement soit "éclipsé" par ton couronnement, tout ce que je veux c'est être avec Oliver. Tout le monde le sait maintenant, c'est idiot de...

Napoléon V (fâché) : Tu ne t'es pas assez bien comportée ces derniers temps, je ne veux pas risquer de nouvelles unes de magazines honteuses pour des broutilles. Tu m'as promis à Compiègne de...

Hortense : C'est injuste Louis ! Oncle Henri m'a raconté tout ce qui s'est passé à Cannes, et sur le yacht, avec Charlotte. Ne viens pas me parler de comportements après ça ! Charlotte n'est pas...

Napoléon V : Ca suffit! Ca suffit! Nous en reparlerons à un autre moment, laisse-moi tranquille!

#simparte #ts4 #ts4 royal #sims 4 royal #royal simblr #sim : louis #sims 4 fr #sims 4 #le cabinet noir #tuileries #sim : hortense #sims 4 royalty #sims 4 royal story #ts4 royals #ts4 royal legacy #ts4 royal simblr #ts4 royalty

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bluesecchymauroses · 2 months

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A la une KurtGaby Shop — kurtgaby

A la une KurtGaby Shop — kurtartfactory

Business card for my shop updated as well as making stories on the store on Instagram!

The text:

How to order?

1)You can go through Vinted

2)Send me a message that Instagram, with your idea, or the photo of the model you want!

You can also reply to my stories to order the creations!

Payments?

Once your order is chosen, you can pay by PayPal, Lydia or directly if you go through Vinted

You can choose the payment method that suits you best!

For personalised orders, payment is done when I complete the order :)

Shipments?

When I received your payment, I would ask you for your information (surname, first name, address, phone number and country) in order to send you your new product 🥰

You can choose to go through Mondial Relay (or you will have to pick up your package at the relay point) or by La Poste (directly in your mailbox)

On Vinted the information has already been entered

The links in my shop to buy a product or place an order:

🌿Vinted: https://www.vinted.fr/member/38165789

☀️Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kurtartfactory

🌈Twitch (where I do orders and other artistic things): https://www.twitch.tv/kurtgaby

Do you like a model? Do you want more information about a product? Do you want a model that is no longer available? Do you want to place an order? Send me a DM 🤍

🍄FR version🍄

Carte de visite pour mon shop mit à jour ainsi que confection des stories à la une pour la boutique sur Instagram !

Le texte :

Comment commander ?

1)Tu peux passer par Vinted

2)Envoie moi un message que Instagram, avec ton idée, ou bien la photo du modèle que tu veux !

Tu peux également répondre à mes stories pour commander les créations !

Paiements ?

Une fois ta commande choisie, tu peux payer par PayPal, Lydia ou bien directement si tu passes par Vinted

Tu peux choisir le moyen de paiement qui te convient le mieux !

Pour les commandes personnalisées, le paiement se passe lorsque je termine la commande :)

Envois ?

Quand j’ai reçu ton paiement, je te demanderais tes informations (nom, prénom, adresse, numéro de téléphone et pays) afin de t’envoyer ton nouveau produit 🥰

Tu peux choisir de passer par Mondial Relay (ou il faudra aller chercher ton colis en point relais) ou bien par La Poste (directement dans ta boîte aux lettres)

Sur Vinted les informations sont déjà rentrées

Les liens de mon shop pour acheter un produit ou passer commande :

🌿Vinted : https://www.vinted.fr/member/38165789

☀️Instagram : https://www.instagram.com/kurtartfactory

🌈Twitch (où je fais les commandes et d’autres choses artistiques) : https://www.twitch.tv/kurtgaby

Un modèle te plaît ? Tu veux + d’infos sur un produit ? Tu veux un modèle qui n’est plus dispo ? Tu veux passer commande ? Envoie moi un DM 🤍

#punk art #punk artist #queer artist #artists on tumblr #kurtartfactory #kurtgaby #art #colorful #procreate #digital arwork #maroquinerie #artisan #artisanat #vinted shop #shoponline #online shop

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rayondelun3 · 6 months

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Journal, 8 novembre 2023.

6:21 du matin.

J'ai des questions plein la tête : est ce que c'est une bonne idée de dire à mon petit-ami à mon petit ami que j'ai envie qu'on ait un rendez-vous romantique ? Et si oui comment lui demander ? Est ce que je lui parle du fait que je vais recommencer à faire en sorte du poids ou est ce que je le garde pour moi ? Je ne vais pas en parler à mes amies. Et mes amies est ce que je leur dis que je me sens seule, délaissée, par elles ? Je ne suis pas en colère, simplement je me retrouve parfois dans des situations stressantes qui finissent par me rendre triste [à cause] d'elles. Je suis fatiguée, normal il est tôt ce matin. Comment vais je rattraper tous les cours que j'ai manqué ? Est ce que je vais réussir à passer en L2 de Lettres Modernes ? Pourquoi je n'arrive toujours pas à faire de démarches administratives ou médicales pour mon bien ? Pourquoi je me défile tout le temps ? Pourquoi je n'en parle à personne ? Pourquoi je fais toujours la dure ? Est ce que L' et ses amies m'ont déjà oubliées ? Je me suis battue pour lui parler, dire ce que je ressentais et qu'on puisse être amies, qu'elle me comprenne, mais ni elle ni l'autre fille ne me saluent, pas un mot ni un regard. Suis je à ce point transparente ? Et toutes ces lettres jamais envoyées ? Toutes ces occasions manquées de voir une amie qui m'est chère ? Est ce qu'elle veut vraiment me revoir ? Pourquoi j'ai toujours froid, même à l'intérieur de moi ? Pourquoi j'ai peur sur Ask et je me remets à bloquer tous les anonymes depuis l'apparition de mon ancien bourreau ? Pourquoi après toutes ces années me reparler, revenir me hanter ? Est ce que j'aurais toujours peur quand je suis seule qu'il m'arrive quelque chose, cette paranoïa qu'il y a quelqu'un caché qui vit avec moi, qui me fait peur, qui va m'attaquer ou que je vais me faire du mal ? Pourquoi je trouve mon corps plus joli une fois que je suis scarifiée ? Pourquoi je m'impose ça, sans y prendre du plaisir, j'ai juste mal et suis satisfaite de m'être faite ces coupures ? Est ce que mon familier est toujours auprès de moi, même si elle est morte en septembre ? Est ce que c'est la raison pour laquelle je déraille autant ? Pourquoi je bois et je fume autant ? Pourquoi je dors énormément ou pas du tout ? Est ce que les douleurs dans ma poitrine vont revenir ? Pourquoi ces filles m'ont trahi ? Pourquoi tous ces mecs m'ont traitée comme une esclave sexuelle, comme de la chair fraîche ? Est ce que c'est de ma faute ? Parce que je culpabilise et je suis persuadée que c'est ma faute ? Pourquoi ma mère est si sadique envers moi ? Pourquoi mon père m'a abandonnée ? Pourquoi ma sœur m'évite et se comporte si froidement avec moi, pourquoi est ce qu'elle m'écarte autant de sa vie ? Pourquoi je n'arrive pas à m'empêcher de penser, de penser trop, de penser mal ? Est ce que je vais réussir ? Est ce que je ne vais pas finir par me tuer un jour ? Et pourquoi on se sert de moi puis on m'oublie, on m'efface comme la craie sur un tableau ? Pourquoi plus personne ne vient vers moi ? Est ce que je rechute encore ? Est ce que ça ira demain ? Est ce que je vais réussir à trouver un travail cet été, à temps plein, à le garder et à mettre de côté et continuer à chaque vacances sans que cet argent se volatilise ? Est ce que je ressemble à mes parents ? Est ce que je vais réussir à briser la chaîne ?

Est ce que je devrais essayer de me rendormir ?

Est ce que j'ai vraiment envie de vivre ou bien je veux toujours mourir ? Est ce que c'est possible d'éprouver les deux à la fois ? Est ce que je suis ridicule, je fais pitié ou je dérange, est ce que j'ai l'air d'une folle ?

Est ce que je ne serais pas folle à moitié ?

- Lisa.

#journal #photographie #my pictures #photography #myself #questions sans réponses

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semiotextiana · 1 year

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"Dans une situation sans issue, je n'ai d'autre choix que d'en finir. C'est dans un petit village dans les Pyrénées où personne ne me connaît que ma vie va s'achever. Je vous prie de transmettre mes pensées à mon ami Adorno et de lui expliquer la situation où je me suis vu placé. ll ne me reste pas assez de temps pour écrire toutes les lettres que j'eusse voulu écrire."

"In this inescapable situation I have no choice but to put an end to it. My life is going to come to an end in a small village in the Pyrenees where no one knows me. I ask you to transmit my thoughts to my friend Adorno and to explain to him the situation in which I've found myself to be. I don’t have enough time to write all the letters I would have wanted to write."

Attributed to Walter Benjamin, in a note handed to Henny Gurland before he committed suicide out of fear of being caught by the Nazis near the border between France and Spain. Henny Gurland destroyed the note after having read it and later reproduced it from memory, resulting in questions as to the "authenticity" of the reproduction.

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le-roi-des-bulgares · 2 years

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again im looking too deep into Voltaire’s memoirs. discovered some brilliantly hidden irony that are so good they almost sent me unconscious when i first connected the dots together

1. Where are my lord king’s diamonds?

Early on in the memoirs, Voltaire wrote about how Prince Frederick made promises that once he’s on the throne, Voltaire could expect some “solid” awards from him.

Then, when Frederick ascended the throne, he sent an ambassador, Camas, to France, who stopped at Brussels carrying some gifts from “le roi son maître” to Voltaire:

« Courez vite, dit Mme du Châtelet ; on vous envoie sûrement les diamants de la couronne. » Je courus, je trouvai l’ambassadeur, qui, pour toute valise, avait derrière sa chaise un quartaut de vin de la cave du feu roi, que le roi régnant m’ordonnait de boire. Je m’épuisai en protestations d’étonnement et de reconnaissance sur les marques liquides des bontés de Sa Majesté, substituées aux solides dont elle m’avait flatté, et je partageai le quartaut avec Camas.

“Run, quickly,” said Mme du Châtelet, “surely it’s the diamonds on the crown that are sent to you!” I ran, found the ambassador, who for all his bagage had a little barrel of wine from the late king’s cellar behind his carriage, which the king ordered me to drink. I exhausted myself [literal: dried myself up] with protestations of the astonishment and gratefulness for the liquid gesture of His Majesty’s kindness, which substituted the solid ones that They flattered me with, then I shared the little barrel with Camas.

The passage in itself is comedic enough with the innocent tone and interplay of word meanings, but several dozen pages later, when recounting the Frankfurt affair, Voltaire reminds us of the “diamonds” that Émilie guessed about but was nowhere to be found. Here, Frederick’s agents demand that “I return the precious effects that I took from His Majesty”. Voltaire responds just like Candide :

« Hélas ! messieurs, je n’emporte rien de ce pays-là, je vous jure, pas même les moindres regrets. Quels sont donc les joyaux de la couronne brandebourgeoise que vous redemandez ?

“Alas! Sirs, I took nothing from that country, I swear to you, not even the tiniest regrets. What are then these jewels on the Brandenburg crown that you ask for?”

There were no diamonds/jewels, as early as in Brussels (which is 1740), in the first place. Frederick never gave Voltaire (any) precious stuff so now what is he asking back? Then, the crown is not even crown of a king but a crown of the upstart elector of Brandenburg. It’s the non-existent diamonds on a crown that’s not even based on a "solid” kingship. This one single line has the power to wreck Frederick’s royal authority.

2. “Myrtles and Roses, Ixion and deep agony”

Later Voltaire quotes some one hundred lines from Frederick’s poem to d’Argens, written in Erfurt in September 1757. The poem in the large expresses how Frederick wants to end his own suffering and find peace in death.

Then Voltaire provides a comment: “the ideas are incoherent, the verses in general are badly written, but there are good ones. It’s a lot for a king to write an epistle of two hundred bad lines, in the situation where he was at.” It’s not a harsh judgment at all, not to mention that “two hundred bad lines” was originally just “two hundred lines”, only later changed by Voltaire.

Voltaire proceeds:

La lettre qu’il m’écrivit témoignait les mêmes sentiments ; mais il y avait moins de myrtes et de roses, et d’Ixion et de douleur profonde. Je combattis en prose la résolution qu’il disait avoir prise de mourir, et je n’eus pas de peine à le déterminer à vivre.

The letter he wrote to me showed the same sentiments, but there were less myrtles and roses, and Ixion and deep agony. I fought in prose the resolution that he said he has taken to die, and it didn’t take me too much to determine him to live again.

a short note before getting to the point: “the resolution that he said he has taken” was originally just written “the resolution that he has taken”. The intention is clear as day here!

Two motifs: Myrtles and roses, and Ixion, are mentioned here. This is where things start to go downhill.

The first group are symbols of Erato, muse of love poetry. They appeared at the very end of Frederick’s poem, and only once (He asks d’Argens to make a bouquet of them and place them at his grave every spring UwU).

In a 200-line poem where 190 of them are about philosophical attitude towards death and how EveRyONe IS AgAinsT ME, and only two brief passages about love (which is still surprising and so so characteristic), it’s a bit weird to pick Erato’s garland as a “recurring” motif. I think it can be said that Voltaire avoided picking anything that has any REAL connection to death, because he wants to hint that Frederick’s wish is not real.

The second motif: Ixion. This reference has surprisingly never occurred in the original poem, at least not in the 1840s published version (Frederick makes revisions very often). On the surface it’s one of them “eternal torture” figures that Frederick love so much to use -- the original poem uses Prometheus just towards the end. Ixion, eternally bond on a spinning wheel, occurs several times throughout Frederick’s oeuvre as well.

But, Ixion, the king who knows no hospitality nor gratefulness and is thus punished (he murdered his guest/father-in-law, and attempted to seduce Hera after being invited by Zeus) is nowhere to be found in the Êpitre d’Erfurt. It’s Voltaire’s invention. I can’t help but be amazed at the sheer skill displayed here. This tiny bit of reference says out loud “He’s not a good host to me, he should be punished”. He slipped it into the commentary just so effortlessly, and masked it as a harmless paraphrase with even a tiny bit of sympathy sprinkled on the surface. WHAT A BRILLIANT BASTARD

part of the reason that this invention appears so natural IMO is also how familiar Voltaire was with Frederick the poet. He just looooved to use those motifs.

#corrections are very welcome!!#long post #fritztaire #fritztaire rant

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