#& don't get me started on the shit said about Eileen

[zepskies]

Smoke Eater - Part 7

Pairing: Firefighter!Dean Winchester x F. Reader 

Summary: Dean Winchester is the cocky, but well-respected Lieutenant at Firehouse 25. He leads by example, but he’s also known to break a few hearts. He’s starting to crave something he’s never had, though. Something stable. Something real. 

That’s when he meets you, on a truly terrible day, trapped in a rickety old elevator.   

🔥 Series Masterlist

AN: So I don't know why it takes me exactly seven chapters to get to the smut, but so far that's three different series where that's happened. 😂 (Never Say Goodbye, Break Me Down, and now Smoke Eater. Go figure! 🤷🏽‍♀️)

Word Count: 6,200 Tags/Warnings: 18+ only! For smutty smut and baking shenanigans, tinge of angst.

Part 7: “Cherry Pie & Lemon Drizzle”

You liked Dean’s apartment. It was on the second floor out of three, and a modest, clean, comfortable space.

Though overall it felt very “dude bro” in décor. You supposed that made sense, considering it was just Sam and Dean living here.

And while you still hadn’t met Sam (he was working late tonight), it gave you a chance to do something you’d been very much looking forward to doing with Dean… 

“Not for nothin’, this is probably one in three of the best things I’ve ever put in my mouth,” said Dean.

True to his word, his mouth was full. You giggled as a flake of pasta spewed from his mouth.

“Oh really? Makes me curious about the other two,” you said mischievously. And you handed him a napkin to blot his face.

You sat across from him in the small dining room adjacent to the kitchen. The table itself was barely big enough to fit in the space, feeling more like a nook than a room, but it sat three people. That was usually enough for Sam and Dean, and occasionally Eileen when she came over.

Dean chuckled, his brows dancing. “Oh, I’m sure you’ll find out.”

Your face warmed at that, despite your amusement. You had made dinner, for which Dean had been more than enthusiastic.

“You mean I get an actual chef making me food? Sign me the hell up,” he’d teased.

Never mind that you weren’t an actual chef. You had focused on patisserie in culinary school. He didn’t seem to mind though, as he’d devoured two servings of salmon and fettucine alfredo, even down to the steamed broccoli. You had to admit, it warmed you inside to see him enjoy your food.

You’d promised to cook for him last week, and he hadn’t let it go until both your schedules opened up enough for you to come over.

He now hummed in satisfaction as he finished off the last bite on his plate and wiped his mouth with the napkin.

“Thanks for this, sweetheart. I needa have you around here more often,” he said, tossing you a grin.

You smiled back. “It’s my pleasure.”

It wasn’t the first time Dean had invited you over to his apartment, but for the life of you, you didn’t know why it had taken you so long to accept.

…Well, okay, you did know why. You were reluctant to leave your grandfather alone, potentially all night. But George had been adamant about you going out for as long as you wanted, on the promise that he’d check in every few hours until he went to bed.

“Okay, ready for dessert?” you asked.

“Uh, yeah,” Dean said. He still thought about those cookies you brought to the firehouse, almost a month ago already.

Damn, has it really been that long? he thought as he helped you collect the dishes from dinner. He followed you into the kitchen, where you already knew the lay of his land.

Sam couldn’t cook for shit, so it usually fell on Dean to be the figure of culinary expertise. But he had no problem making way for you, especially if you were going to look over your shoulder and wink at him like that.

“Good, because you’re going to help me,” you informed him.

Dean’s smile grew. “All right…what did you have in mind?”

While he started on the dishes in the sink, you hauled out even more ingredients from a big grocery bag you’d brought and stored in the refrigerator. He watched you out of the corner of his eye and spotted lemons, among other things.

“Lemon drizzle cake,” you replied. “One of my grandma’s recipes. I just need a mixing bowl and a cake tin.”

“Good, because we’re not very Betty Crocker in this place. Let’s just say my kitchen tools are limited,” he said, raising a brow at you. “You know, if you wanted to bake, I’m sure you’ve got all the proper bells and whistles at your house. We could’ve done this over there.”

You paused to consider the question he wasn’t quite asking, because he had a point. You could’ve invited him over your house instead. You joined him near the sink and leaned against the counter, tapping your nails on the tile surface.

“Well, as you know, I live with my grandpa,” you said.

“Good ol’ George,” Dean grinned. “That guy’s hilarious. Like the fourth Stooge.”

He particularly liked the story you’d told him about the time George had bought you your first makeup palette when you turned fifteen, but hadn’t told you it was face paint…the kind that clowns used.

“And I’d love for you two to get to know each other better. Don’t get me wrong. But barring the fact that we probably wouldn’t have much…privacy,” you pointed out with a subtle smile, trying to ignore Dean’s resulting smirk. Never mind that you two hadn’t needed “privacy” just yet.

“I guess I’m just not used to inviting people over. I’ve been trying to limit the exposure to germs in the house,” you admitted. At Dean’s quizzical look, you had to explain.

“My grandfather had cancer last year,” you said. “He had surgery to remove the mass, and did well, considering his age. He’s in remission now…but I’m still looking after him.”

You’d gone with him to see his primary doctor a couple of weeks ago for that persistent cough. While the doctor seemed to think it was George’s asthma acting up, you’d still scheduled an appointment with his oncologist.

And while your thoughts led you down an all-too familiar path, Dean processed this with a nod of his head. He shut off the sink. After drying his hands, he looked over at you and brushed your cheek with his thumb.

“I’m glad he’s doing better now,” he said. His brows furrowed. “And your grandma passed just a few years before that?”

You nodded, letting out a deep breath. “Yeah. It’s been a long few years.”

So, Dean took an inventory in his mind as he rested a comforting hand on your back. You took care of your family. You could cook. You were beautiful. And still, you kicked ass at your job and seemed to have the rest of your shit together.

He had to admit. The more he learned about you, the more he liked you.

“Anyway,” you shook your head with a smile. “Sorry. Ready to bake?”

Dean’s lips quirked as he followed you to the other side of the kitchen. He stepped behind you and letting his hands fall to your waist. His lips skimmed the side of your head, pressing a kiss there.

“Okay, Rachael Ray,” he teased. “Teach me your ways.”

You were trying to measure out some sugar in the bowl first, but you giggled with a warm blush as he kissed his way down your neck.

“Are you actually going to help, or are you just going to distract me?” you volleyed back.

Dean hummed against the crook of your neck. “Can’t I do both?”

You picked up and egg and raised it level with his face.

“Hmm, should I try cracking this against your forehead?” you pondered.

His teeth playfully nipped your skin in retaliation, making you flinch with a yelp. The egg actually cracked in your hand.

“Shit,” you laughed, and you quickly dropped as much of it in the bowl as possible. But getting fractals of the shell in the bowl disturbed your anal sense of meticulousness. When it came to cracking eggs, you typically had nothing if not precision.

You shot Dean an accusatory look over your shoulder. He just grinned back at you.

“Am I helping yet?” he joked.

You chuckled dryly in response. “Just you wait.”

A few more minutes and “helpful” distractions from Dean later, you successfully had a cake batter in the bowl. You were hand mixing up a storm and sorely missing your Kitchen Aid mixer. Dean was right though; his cupboards had little more than one cake pan, one mixing bowl, and one wooden spoon.

At home, you had a modest collection of cookware and bakeware that rivaled Williams & Sonoma. Though that had been a gift from your grandparents, when you graduated from culinary school. (Your grandma had picked them out before she passed.)

“What’s your favorite dessert?” you asked Dean. You were pretending not to catch him sampling the batter with a finger while you buttered the cake tin.

“Ever?” he asked, rubbing a licked finger on his jeans.

“Yeah. Number one top favorite.”

“Hmm,” he contemplated with a cross of his arms. “Pie, I guess.”

You smirked. That explained his little man-child display a few weeks ago, when you’d tried to share his blueberry pie on your second date.

“What flavor?” you asked.

“I dunno. I’m not real picky,” he said.

“Come on. Everyone has a favorite flavor,” you reasoned. “I’m more of a cake girl myself, but even I love a blueberry pie.”

Dean eyed your teasing grin with a growing smirk of his own. He remembered that day in your office just as well as you.

“Okay, fine. Apple, I guess,” he replied. You gave him a mocking look.

“Really, the most basic of them all?” You tsked at him, shaking your head. “What happened to Mr. Rocky Road?”

Dean chuckled, but he leaned against the counter next to you. Instead of giving it to you right back, as usual, he looked more thoughtful. A gentler look grew on his face. It caught your attention.

“You know, one of my earliest memories…” He looked up at you then, more self-deprecating.

You realized he was about to admit to something, maybe embarrassing, or maybe just vulnerable. Your smile softened too as you paused in what you were doing.

“You can’t leave me hanging on that one,” you said. And you drew closer with a hand soothing up his arm.

He glanced over at you. “I remember being…four, probably. My mom made pies during Christmastime. Cherry, pecan, whatever. But my favorite was her apple pie. I still remember it, because I haven’t had a pie since that tasted like that one.”

Your heart clenched, but your insides also warmed. Not just at the story of his mother, but the way Dean told it, his voice softer, steady, and deep. It told you a lot about him without him having to explain; just like you, he knew what loss was.

You curled your hands around his bicep and pressed a kiss to his shoulder. Then your gaze drew back up to his.

“Have you talked to your dad since the last time?” you asked, a bit cautiously. “About his investigation of the fire?”

Dean sighed deep through his nose. “No.”

But despite his father’s warning, he had spoken to Sam.

“It’s different this time, Sam. The brand marks are the same,” Dean argued with his brother, this time in the living room. He sat on the couch while Sam stood, trying to process everything Dean had just told him about Mary’s potential murder.

“You saw the pictures yourself?” Sam asked.

Dean frowned. “No, but Dad—”

“Dean,” Sam cut him off as he gripped at his temples in frustration. “This is what he does. He sees evidence where he wants to see evidence. I’ve been down this road with him too, you know.”

“Yeah, I know,” Dean gritted out. John had roped Sam into helping him a few times, using his ADA status to look into different leads that ultimately hadn’t panned out.

“They always look like connections to him, but they never end up being anything more than his obsession,” Sam said.

He was firm, and Dean understood why, but his gut was telling him that it was different this time…

Still, he had no choice but to let it go. For now.

Dean shook his head of that memory. Instead, he tried to focus on being here with you. He liked this little yellow sundress you had on, despite the fall chill starting to set in outside. As usual, your hair was clipped up away from your neck while you got ready to put the now full cake tin into the oven.

He came over behind you and freed your hair from the clip, letting it all tumble down. You yelped and glanced over at him.

“Dean,” you chided, even though you were smiling. “My hair’s going to get in the batter.”

“I’ll keep it away, don’t worry,” he said lightly. He curled some of your hair around his hand so he could once again press a tantalizing kiss to the back of your neck. He felt you shiver.

You subtly leaned back against him, even as you whined in protest.

“Can you just let me get this in the oven?” you asked on a laugh. He smirked against your skin. You did manage to get the cake in the oven, but his lips and teasing hands were unrelenting as you tried to start cleaning up.

So you felt you had to take matters into your own hands. A mischievous idea had you smiling. You reached out for some flour that had spilled on the counter.

You turned, and before he realized what you were up to, you marked his forehead with an arch of white against his skin.

“Simba,” you said in a deeper voice, trying to mimic Mufasa from The Lion King.

Dean’s brows rose along with his widening eyes. He’d never seen you do something that childish, but it sparked his competitiveness as he blinked a bit of flour out of his eyes.

“You’re real proud of yourself, aren’t you?” he asked.

Your little smirk was answer enough. You flicked a bit more flour onto his shirt.

Dean chuckled darkly. “Okay, you asked for it.”

Both a gasp and a giggle caught in your throat.

“Oh, no.”

He reached past you for some flour off the counter and flicked it down at you, into your hair, across your face. He grabbed your flailing wrist and marked your cheeks. All the while, his grin grew ever deeper at your shrieking protests.

But you grew devious. You stuck two fingers into the bowl and scraped out a gob of raw, yellow batter. You were fully prepared to fling it into his face, but Dean grabbed your wrist.

“Ey, ey!” he raised a warning finger with his free hand. “You’re about to take this to a new level.”

You met his gaze through your lashes with a playful smile. “So?”

Dean raised a brow at you. He could admit, you had audacity. All he could do was call your bluff.

He took one of your battered fingers into his mouth. Your eyes widened at the feel of his soft tongue swirling around your finger, sucking it clean. All the while, his eyes never broke from yours.

Lord have mercy, you thought. Really, it was the only coherent one in your head.

He soon released you with a soft pop, before he did the same to the second finger.

Your breath hitched, and your blush was a living thing spreading down your neck, even as warmth pooled between your legs. By the time your second finger slid out of his mouth, you had to reach back to grip the counter just to steady yourself.

His arm slipped around your waist, and you reached for his face with both hands, bringing him down for the hottest kiss you’d ever had in your life. Teeth clicking, lips and tongues warring and devouring. Your fingers slipped roughly through his hair, while he gripped your hips and ass with a passion just shy of bruising.

You almost didn’t register the way his hands slipped under your thighs, to then heft you up onto the counter. You gasped into his mouth and clung tightly to his shoulders. He chuckled and positioned himself to stand between your legs.

“What, need a little warning?” he teased. Though he was breathless as your soft lips veered away from his, starting a burning path across his jaw and down his neck. You left the remnants of your lipstick all along the way, but it was the occasional graze of your teeth that had him moaning for you.

“Maybe,” you whispered coarsely against his skin, uttering a small laugh, “Sometimes I forget how damn strong you are.”

He scoffed. “Sweetheart, if I can heft a grown man on my shoulders up a flight of stairs, I can get you up on a little counter.”

You snorted in response. Perks of dating a firefighter.

And you shoved off his plaid shirt from his shoulders. Dean helped you by letting it drop the rest of the way to the floor, followed by his black undershirt.

You couldn’t believe this was the first time you were seeing him with his shirt off. It was a damn shame, really. But you caught the bit of smugness curving his lips at the way you were ogling, first with your eyes, then with your exploring hands over his toned arms and chest, and the solid plane of his abs, all the way down to his belt. You started undoing the clasp.

Dean couldn’t believe he was doing this, but he stopped you with his hands gently curling around your wrists. You looked up at him in confusion. To him, you looked unbelievably sexy then. Thoroughly kissed, hair tousled, a strap of your dress fallen to one shoulder while your lacey black bra peeked through.

Just the memory of having your curves in his hands had his dick hardening in his jeans, but he blew out a breath.

“Dean?” you asked. “What’s wrong?”

His hands tightened on yours as he peered down at you. “Are you sure?”

You blinked incredulously. “Did I look not sure?”

He paused, licking his lips. He raised a hand to hold your cheek.

“I just…you know I’m trying to do this right with you,” he said. “I just want to know…”

He couldn’t seem to finish what he was trying to say, but you thought you understood. You smiled up at him warmly. You leaned up for a kiss, softer this time.

“Dean, I trust you,” you said. And you could finally say it with no reservations. “I think this feels real. More real than anything I’ve had in a long time… What about you?”

When Dean smiled, it was warm, melting away the doubt in his eyes.

“Yeah, me too,” he said.

He seemed sincere. Maybe this man spared few words when it came to how he felt, but you’d seen a glimpse of the deeper parts. He felt things deeply, down to his bones.

His fingers sunk into your hair, and he guided you into a kiss. It was slower, but no less heady and wanting than the first. Your arms wrapped around his middle, letting you flatten your palms against the muscles in his back. But just as you were getting comfortable, Dean broke the kiss. He flashed you a smirk.

Before you could ask what the hell he was about to do, he’d hefted you back into his arms and over his shoulder. You squawked in protest as your whole world tipped over. Your face thudded on his back with a soft oof, your hair loose and falling like a curtain. Your hands accidentally fell against his ass.

“Ooh, someone’s handsy,” Dean teased.

“Dean!” you exclaimed, despite your peals of laughter. “Is this really necessary? I think I can find your room just fine.”

“Call it an officer’s escort,” he supplied.

“That’s for policemen!” you argued.

You couldn’t see it, but you could imagine the way he was grinning from ear to ear as he carried you through the apartment. You never noticed just how long his bowed legs were as he strode onward. But it felt like his shoulder was digging into your appendix.

Grunting in frustration, you slapped his ass again for good measure.

Dean laughed. “Hey, you’re only fueling my fire, baby.”

He slapped your ass right back, since he had an even better vantage point. He even slipped a hand underneath your little sundress and squeezed the inside of your thigh teasingly.

Your answering yelp, and the futile kick of your feet, had him laughing harder. His cheeks were aching.

Finally he reached his room, where he shut the door with his foot. He was gentle as he eased you off his shoulder and laid you down on his bed. You let out a breathless huff once your head hit the pillows. Your face was all red from being suspended upside-down, your hair a mess, and your dress pooling over your folded legs.

You gave Dean a playful glare. “Get over here.”

His smirk deepened, but he obliged you. He chucked his shoes off first, just like you let your sandals slip off the side of the bed.

He soon made his way up the bed, until he was hovering over you with his arms braced on either side of your head. He liked the way you were all laid out for him over his sheets, your wild hair spread over his pillows. He’d pictured something like this before, but nothing came close to having you for real.

He just didn’t know you’d been dreaming of the same thing.

You hadn’t allowed yourself to truly fall for someone, not in a long time. You’d been too focused on pivoting after school, on building your career, on taking care of your family. You’d dated here and there, but nothing had stuck for more than a few months. Even then, you’d never felt half of what you felt right now.

It scared you a little, but it also made you feel alive. Being with Dean made you feel that way.

So you took his face between your hands. His stubble rasped against your palms and the pads of your fingers. You didn’t mind that though. He’d left it a bit long for a shave last week. When you’d mentioned off-hand that you liked the thicker scruff (thinking it made him all the more handsome), he’d kept it for you. 

Now, he seemed like he was waiting on your cue.

You guided him down to you. He kissed you hot and slow, while a hand moved to your waist and clenched in the material of your dress. He slipped a heavy thigh between both of yours. The pressure was welcome, but you wanted friction.

You bunched up the skirt of your dress and aimed to slip it off, but Dean stopped your hands.

“That’s my job,” he teased.

“Then how about you get to it?” you countered with a smile. He rose a brow at you.

“A bit bossy, but I can dig that,” he smirked.

His kisses dropped against your neck, down your exposed neckline, and he peeled down the straps of your dress one by one. Your breathing became more labored as he touched you, squeezing a breast over the bra as he exposed more inches of your body.

Your fingers carded through his hair on a sigh as he made his way further down. Though he finally got impatient enough to work your dress off all the way, followed by his jeans and your bra and matching lacey panties. He lavished attention what felt like all over your body.

Really, he was just strategic. He stopped in places where you lost breath, moaning his name. Like the spot just under your ear, where he sucked hard enough to make you see stars. Or over your breasts, taking a pebbled nipple in his mouth, swirling with his tongue like he had the cake batter off your fingers.

His hands mapped out the soft planes and curves of your body for the first time, sometimes smooth and grazing, sometimes adding pressure that made warmth continue to pool between your legs.  

He went further still, wrapping an arm around your thigh and pressing nipping kisses along the inside. All the while his mouth drew closer to the place you wanted him the most. Even though you still raised up on your elbow and gave him a questioning look.

“Really? You want to…” Your voice came out in a whisper.

Dean looked up at you with puzzled brows. “Why not?”

You shook your head, your eyes widening marginally.

“No reason, I guess. I, um…I’ve never had someone do this for me first.” And certainly not on the first time having sex.

Dean frowned.

“Really?” he asked. “A guy’s never gone down on you first?”

You blushed. “Well, maybe with his fingers, but not…”

He shook his head and let out a breath. You felt it between your thighs, and your core clenched in anticipation.

“Okay, baby. I gotcha,” he said. He guided you back down with a gentle hand. “Just lie back and relax.”

You smiled, despite your lingering blush, and you stroked the hand that rested above your stomach. That hand soon slid down as he once again kissed and licked down your thighs. They quivered a bit as his fingers slipped between your folds.

“So fucking wet for me already,” he said in approval. You peered down at him, unable to help a smile.

“You want a medal?” you quipped.

Dean’s brows rose.

“Oh, I’m about to earn it.” His eyes found yours. “You know what my real favorite pie flavor is?”

Your brows knitted together. “What?”

A familiar smirk crossed his lips. “Cherry.”

Before your choked surprise could be broken with a laugh, he began. 

And he wasn’t lying, about any of it. The pads of his fingers began toying with your clit, and that alone had your breath hitching and your hips squirming.

He held you down with one hand on your lower belly while his tongue joined his fingers, seeking your heat and finding the hot channel where you craved to be filled. You gasped.

“Oh, God,” you uttered. Once his warm tongue began rolling inside you, you almost couldn’t breathe.

He worked you over with fingers, lips and tongue until you were arching off the bed, fists clenched in his hair and in the sheets, releasing broken gasps of his name. He didn’t relent until your thighs stopped shaking around his head. Your knees were damn near pinning him there.

He eventually withdrew, wiping his mouth and nose with the back of his hand. He moved smoothly back up your body and heeded the pull of your hands on his arms, and then his face. You tugged him down for a sloppy kiss. 

“How’s that for a first?” he asked breathlessly. His tone was teasing, but he was half-serious you thought, by the look in his eyes.

You were honest, without a hint of a joke. “Fucking incredible. Just like you.”

Dean wouldn’t admit it then, but what you said warmed him. He looked down on you with a smile.

Your hands caressed his face, down his neck and firm chest, and further still to caress his straining length over his boxer briefs. Dean let out a halting moan at your gentle touch. 

“What if I want to return the favor?” you asked with a smile. He made a sound deep in his throat when you cupped him more firmly, letting your thumb brush over the head.

Well hello, you thought. He was thick, and a bit longer than your first thought. Your already sensitive core tightened at the thought. 

Meanwhile, Dean squeezed your arm. His hot gaze bore into yours.

“Very, very tempting.” His thumb brushed your lower lip. “I’ve no doubt you’ve got some talents yourself.”

You smiled under the pad of his thumb. Part of you was contemplating some retribution, sucking it into your mouth the way he’d done to your fingers in the kitchen.

“But I’m thinkin’ I want to skip to the part where I have you coming apart all over again,” said Dean. His head bowed near your ear, though his lips skimmed the side of your face. “This time, from the inside.”

His voice was deep and threaded with grit. You bit your lip on a giddy laugh. You managed to nod, sweeping your shaky fingers through his hair.

“Okay, next time then,” you promised and gave him a sensuous kiss. “But first, just want to make sure you’re ready for me…”

You leaned down to slide his underwear for him, down to his knees. He helped you the rest of the way, kicking them off his legs. When he came back, you were sitting up.

You soothed warm hands along his thighs and took his cock into your hands. Dean dropped his forehead onto your shoulder with a grunt, again squeezing your arms as you touched him properly for the first time.

Dean had a habit of impressing you, and this was no different. You liked the feel of him in your hands, warm and thick and heavy.

After licking your hand to coat it with some wetness, you experimented for a moment in how you stroked him, trying to get a feel for what he liked just as he had for you. He gasped and jolted on one particular twist, and he finally stopped you with a hand on your wrist.

“Okay, baby. Keep that up and we’re not gonna get much farther for a while,” he said coarsely.

It was satisfying to know you’d made him feel even a fraction of how he’d made you feel.

You pressed a purposeful kiss into his neck. “I told you, next time I’ll take care of you for real.”

He chuckled, cupping the side of your face.

“Oh, you’re about to. Believe me,” he said.

He kissed you long and deep, until you were once again breathless. The two of you were kneeling in the middle of the bed like you had all the time in the world. And yet, you wanted him more than ever.

“I’m on birth control,” you told him between more fervent kisses, hands drifting, feeling skin to warm, dewy skin, breaths mingling.

“And I’m clean,” he said. You nodded, hesitating…

“It’s our first time,” you said. “Condom, just to be safe.”

He hesitated only a beat before he nodded back, agreeing to your request. “Yes, ma’am.”

He broke from you briefly. He turned and dug into his nightstand while your nails drew light patterns down his back. It was distracting in the best of ways. A trill of excitement had his hands moving quickly, ripping the foil packet open and fitting himself with the condom.

When he was ready for you, he turned and hooked an arm around your waist. You twined your arms around his neck, and once again, you let him lay you down. His kiss came first, and then his fingers between your legs, past your folds to stroke you back to life.

You moaned into his mouth and wrapped your legs around his hips. Though he surprised you again by hooking your legs over his shoulders. Your brows raised at him, and he shot you a wink.

“Trust me, you’ll like it this way,” he said.

You did trust him. Your hands caressed down his neck, down his chest, and you subtly urged him with your heels on his back, encouraging him where you both knew he needed to be.

And with one slow push, his cock was stretching your inner walls with slow, delicious friction. You both groaned at the feeling. His forehead pressed against yours. His hand trembled slightly, brushing your hair away from your face. And he began moving inside you in steady strokes.

Dean was putting his all into this tonight. He thought your promises to take care of him next time were as endearing as they were sexy as hell. Even now, you were touching him wherever you could reach, occasionally moaning his name in his ear, encouraging him with every thrust inside you.

Fuck, he was right, you thought. He was reaching places deep inside you, filling you to the very brim. And you were already on the edge of pleasure, brows furrowed, biting your lower lip so hard that your teeth nearly broke the skin…

Your fingers slipped down between you to further part your folds and rub your already sensitive clit. Dean caught the hint and moved your hand to do it himself, as in time with his thrusts as he could. Finally, you unraveled for the second time that night. Your gasp gave way to a moan.

Your tightening walls gripped him like a vice. His release hit him with the same force, choking a near shout out of him. His hand was a bit too tight in your hair, he realized, so he forced himself to ease up.

He petted over your hair instead as he came down with ragged breaths. After he released your shaky legs back to the bed, he leaned mostly on his elbow and thigh instead of sinking all his weight onto you.

You appreciated that. You soothed up and down his back while you panted for breath.

“Wow,” you managed to say.

Dean’s chuckle took him by surprise too.

“Yeah,” he agreed. He turned his head to press a sloppy kiss where your neck met your shoulder.

Just then, a distant-sounding jingle reached your ears. It was familiar…and you remembered it was the alarm on your phone, which was probably in the kitchen.

“Oh shit,” you gasped. “The cake’s still in the oven.”

He blinked. “Well, I don’t smell burning, so we’re good.”

“Dean! You’re a firefighter, remember?” you laughed, but you still tapped his shoulder so he’d roll over. Reluctantly he did, but he still took you with him, even after he’d slid out of you.

You yelped and clung to his shoulders to balance yourself. “I gotta get the cake!”

“Five more minutes,” he grumbled into your neck. He also liked the way your breasts were pressed against his chest.

“It’s going to be so…damn…burnt!” You punctuated each of those syllables with a playful smack on his arm, until he finally released you with a lazy smirk.

You shook your head and huffed in amusement. Sliding out of bed, you searched around your dress. The first thing you found was his discarded undershirt. You slipped it on real quick and cautiously padded out of Dean’s room. You didn’t know if Sam was back from work, but this was not how you wanted to meet him.

The halls were quiet, so you didn’t think he was home yet. You managed to get to the kitchen unscathed, where you turned off your timer and grabbed some oven mitts. You opened the oven and pulled out the cake, setting it down on the counter. Your eyes narrowed at the almost perfect dome on top.

“What’s the verdict, Chef Ramsay?”

Dean leaned in the doorway, dressed in a pair of gray sweatpants and nothing else. The view was delectable, but you sighed and gestured at the cake with a shake of your head.

“It’s burnt.”

“What? No, it’s not,” he refuted. He joined your side and stared down at the top of the cake, which was half browned. “Looks all right to me.”

“Trust me, it’s going to be dry,” you said, “even with the lemon drizzle on it.”

It was the perfectionist in you that smarted with disappointment. You didn’t want to serve anyone something you weren’t proud of, especially Dean. But he just leaned over and pressed a kiss to the side of your head.

“Don’t beat yourself up,” he said. “I’m still gonna eat the crap out of it.”

You glanced at him, unable to help a small smile. He grinned back.

“Anyway, I think it was worth it. Don’t you?” Dean said. He pulled you in towards him by your waist, and you went willingly, resting your hands against his bare chest. You let your nails drag against his skin a little as you contemplated.

You looked up at him with a grin of your own.

“Yeah. Definitely worth it.”

Dean later sat with you again at the table, this time with your chairs closer together as you each ate large slices of delicious cake (even if it was a bit dry). Out of the corner of his eye, he noted the copious number of dishes still left in the sink and the flour and batter sprinkled across the counter.

He knew Sam was going to have a conniption when he got home (in the morning at this rate). He was probably crashing at Eileen’s apartment tonight.

Good, Dean thought. That meant he’d have the place all to himself, with you.

“You know, I just realized something,” he said.

You knew that look in his eyes. He was about to say something smartass.

“What’s that?” you asked. He reached out and thumbed at your chin.

“I just got my dessert twice in one sitting,” he remarked. “That’s pretty damn good, if you ask me.”

You snorted in laughter. You also blushed, but you were unable to stop smiling either.

You set down your fork and eased back from the table. Your hand on Dean’s shoulder encouraged him to do the same, so you could sit across his lap. He welcomed you with a warm hand on your bare thigh. Already it was creeping under the shirt you borrowed.

You stroked his cheek with the back of your hand and gave him a mischievous smile.

“Think you could handle another serving?”

AN: 🫣 Was it everything you wanted it to be? lol I love me some baking innuendo. What did you like more: eating the cherry pie or making the lemon drizzle? 😏❤️‍🔥

In Part 8, Dean's past comes a knockin'...

Next Time:

While you were getting dressed, a phone buzzed on one of the nightstands beside the bed. It was Dean’s phone.

You went over to it curiously as you fixed the straps of your dress. The screen showed a missed text message from last night, around 10:00 p.m., and another one this morning. You read the latest one with a sinking feeling in your chest.

From Marissa: Surprised I didn’t hear back from you last night. The offer still stands. 😘

Keep Reading: PART 8

Dean Winchester Masterlist

Main Masterlist

Series Tag List (Part 1):

@hobby27 @kazsrm67 @letheatheodore @agothwithheavysetmakeup @jacklesbrainworms @foxyjwls007 @wincastifer @iamsapphine @simpforbuckyb

@vanillawhiskeyflavoredkisses @roseblue373 @this-is-me19 @emily-winchester @spnexploration @deans-spinster-witch @deans-baby-momma @iprobablyshipit91

@melancholictearz @nic-kolas @katherineann814 @sleepyqueerenergy @wayward-lost-and-never-found @thewritersaddictions @just-levyy @samanddeaninatrenchcoat @deanwanddamons @antisocialcorrupt @lacilou @adoringanakin @theonlymaninthesky @teehxk @midnightmadwoman @brianochka @branj19

@agalliasi @venicesem @chriszgirl92 @lyarr24 @ladysparkles78 @solariklees @xsophianicolex @deansbbyx @candy-coated-misery0731 @curlycarley @sarahgracej @bagpussjocken @ultrahviolentart @chernayawidow @beskarfilms @mimaria420

#Cherry Pie & Lemon Drizzle #Smoke Eater #Part 7 #dean winchester #Firefighter!Dean Winchester #dean winchester x reader #Dean Winchester x female reader #firefighter!Dean Winchester x Reader #dean winchester x you #firefighter AU #dean winchester AU #spn #supernatural #zepskies writes

[nescaveckwriter]

Paintbrushes And Romance 🥰🐞

Dean x Reader

Part 5 🥰🐞

A/N: Brace yourselves loves, this one's a rollercoaster...🥰🐞🙈

Warnings: Violence, Swearing, Blood, Gore, Sexual Content, Anger, 🙈

...........

You've been running around these last few weeks, maybe because you've been trying to work through some stuff.

Stirring your coffee, while sitting deep in thought, remembering where it all started, in this little shop, you found love, like you've never known before. After that day in the middle of the street, with the snowflakes falling, so much has happened...

From spending Christmas together with both your families, at one long table, with your parents and his parents, your brother and his girlfriend Ruby, meeting Eileen, Sam's wife, who's now your best friend, you two just clicked, due too te fact that you have learned sign language all those years ago while traveling through Europe. Giving out presents and just having a blast. It weren't weird or awkward it just felt right, like it was meant to be.

Summer came and your love grew deeper and deeper, you know eachother so well, so very well, talking for hours and laughing. There were sometimes when the job got to Dean, and he would just withdraw from everything, even you a little but you would just be there waiting patiently, untill he would start opening up, and you'll just listen, he would lay his head on your lap and you'll just run your fingers through his hair!

Smile tugging at your lips now, remembering that one night, the first time you two became one, skin against skin, laying in bed, his fingers tracing little circles on your tummy, when his fingers runs across the scar, on your ribs, following the tattoo you had there, the image consisted of leaves starting right by the scar, and on the leaves there was lady bugs, leading up to two lady bugs with there wings open leading to the word in cursive writing "free" he, got up a little, looking you in the eyes, mischievous smile at the corners of his mouth, its you he said, what you ask confusing on your face, your the best selling author "lady bug" aren't you he said, you nodded, bursting into laughter.

Biting your lip, thinking about the leaves starting to change colour, that's when it all happened. The knocking at your door, consisted and urgent, your heart sank, did something happen to the man that you love. Shakily turning the knob and opening the door, there he stands, worry on his face, the well known dent between his eyebrows, letting you know something is terrible wrong, his face hardened, I... I... He started, words barely leaving his parched lips, just came by to let you know, that this isn't working for me anymore, I thought I could do this, I could love you, love this white picked fence life. But I don't, I can't it's making me miserable, he said hand running down his face, his give away sign that his not happy. You just stood there, heartbreak and the smell of the freshly baked cherry pie hanging thick in the air, he just turned around and left and you haven't seen him since. Tears burning behind your eyes while taking a sip of your coffee, you cursed yourself, you need to start working on your fifth book, Chuck your publisher is really breathing down your neck. You hear the bells, welcoming someone new, you look up to see who it is. Its Dean, but his hair and beard a lot longer than normal, in all honesty he looks like shit, is he even getting enough sleep, is he eating, still worried about him, you'll probably never stop loving him.

....

He can sense, her sitting in the corner, he doesn't want to turn and look, knowing how much he hurt her with what he said, thinking about the words he said to her, he didn't love her , he didn't want the whole white picket fence life with kids running around, that can't be further from the damn truth! Waiting for his order of black coffee to be done, replaying the events that happened during the day, that made him decide to break things with her, if only she could know it was to protect her, subconsciously playing with the chain around his neck, on the chain a diamond ring, yes he thinks to himself, he wanted to ask her to make him the happiest man alive that weekend, but then came the envelope, with a bunch of photos of her, stating her routine and then the note...

#Spotify #dean winchester fanfiction #dean winchester x reader #eileen leahy #jared padalecki #jensen ackles x reader #sam and dean #benny lafitte #castiel spn #dean winchester imagine #spotify

[silent-stories]

𝐒𝐈𝐂𝐊

Summary: After a hunt, Dean gets sick, but he don't want to admit it. When he finally does, he lets you take care of him.

Pairing: Sick!Dean x F!Reader

Warnings: a bit of angst, fluff

Word count: 1442

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

The hunt of the day before had been hard, but you had managed to save everyone. You, Sam and Dean had gone to kill a Wendigo in a wood not too far from the bunker where you lived.

The hard part began when a thunderstorm erupted and carried away the footprints you were following, a few hours later, however, you managed to kill the monster and save two children who had been kidnapped. They had a few minor injuries, but they would have been fine.

You had returned home soaking wet and it was late at night, you had washed yourself of the remains of dirt, rain and blood that you had on yourself and you had gone to sleep immediately afterwards.

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

"Is Dean still sleeping?" You asked Sam the next day while you were having breakfast.

"I think so, he's probably still tired." Sam answered while spreading jam on his toast.

"Morning." Dean mumbled a few moments later, entering the room.

"Hey, are you okay?" You asked when you noticed his skin paler than usual and sleepy face. His hair went in all directions and made him look like a cute hedgehog, you thought.

"'M fine." He replied filling a glass of water.

"Your pie is on the shelf next to the fridge." Sam told his brother.

"Not hungry." He just answered him before taking the glass of water he had filled and heading back to his room.

"This is weird." Sam told you. "Maybe it's better if I stay here..." Sam continued.

"Absolutely not. Eileen is waiting for you. I'll try to find out what your strange brother's problem is." You said with a laugh.

Sam thought about it for a few moments.

"Okay, thanks. You're the best." He told you before leaving the bunker.

When Sam left, you went to see what was happening to Dean.

"Hey." You said opening the door to his room slightly and peeking inside. Dean was still wearing sweatpants and an old T-shirt with the name of one of the bands you always listened to in the Impala on. He was curled up on the bed and didn't even turn around when you walked into the room.

"Dean, what's going on?" You asked as you approached. It couldn't be a hangover, he hadn't even had time to drink the night before.

"I'm fine. It's nothing." He responded quickly, his voice low.

"Dean, that's not true. I know when something is wrong, I ..." You tried to get him to talk.

"Y/N, STOP IT. I'M GOOD!" He yelled at you as he sat on the bed with a snap.

"Well, good to know!" You blurted out as you walked out of his room and slammed the door.

If Dean didn't want to tell you what was going on with him, the problem would be his, not yours, you thought as you headed for your bedroom.

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

Some hours later, Dean still hadn't left his room. You prepared some food (just for you, maybe you were acting a little numb but Dean treated you like shit, what were you supposed to do?) and you had lunch watching some episode of your favorite series. You ended up binge-watching a whole season, so it had been kind of a long time. That asshole was starting to worry you.

When you heard the sound of a glass falling and shattering on the ground, you decided to go check him out. You went through the hallways of the bunker until you reached his room, opening the door slightly. Dean was sitting on the edge of the bed, his hands shaking like his whole body, his empty glass shattered on the floor. His face even paler than the last time you saw him hours ago.

"Dean." You whispered as you walked into the room, placing a hand on his forehead. It was burning.

"Dean, you have a high fever. Why didn't you tell me that ..." You started saying.

"I'm fine." He interrupted you. His voice little more than a whisper.

"That's not true Dean, stop repeating it. I should have come to check on you before, I'm sorry. Did you take something to lower your temperature?" You asked.

He just shook his head.

"I'm going to get you something huh?" You said. "Leave the glass there, I'll think about it later." You added before leaving, the last thing you wanted was for Dean to cut himself trying to clean up.

A few minutes later, after searching all over the bunker, you are back in Dean's room with the box of pills you were looking for and a new glass of water. You found Dean curled up on his bed again, you could see his back shivering. You took a blanket from the closet and put it around him.

"Dean, I need you to take a pill. Can you do that?" You asked placing your hand on his forehead again to notice that it burned more than before, his eyes were closed.

"Dean, please. I need you to sit down." You whispered.

He muttered something you couldn't understand.

"What?" You asked.

"Your hand is cold. It feels good." You managed to understand this time.

"Dean, my hand isn't cold, it's you that's burning. Please sit down, I need you to take this pill for me." You said grabbing his arm and making him sit with his head against the wall. He finally opened his eyes.

"You're beautiful." He whispered when he saw you.

"Dean, you're delusional. Come on, take this." you said handing him the pill. With his trembling hand, after several attempts, he brought it to his mouth.

"Good, now drink." You said bringing the glass to his lips. After a few sips he started coughing, but swallowed the pill.

"Okay, it's okay, you'll be okay." You whispered as you helped him lie down again. He curled up against your body while still trembling, you wrapped the blanket around him.

After a few moments, when you thought he was asleep again, you felt his hand reach for yours.

"Hey, what..." You started saying but stopped when you realized what he wanted. Taking your hand, he brought it to his face. You touched his cheek.

"You cold." He murmured.

You thought about explaining that he had the wrong temperature, not you, but then you gave up and let your hand run over his cheek and forehead. He just sighed in relief and a few minutes later he fell asleep.

You stayed next to him for about an hour and his temperature had started to slowly drop, when he opened his eyes again.

"You're still here." he told you almost incredulous.

"Did you want me to leave?"

"I ... no, I didn't want to. But why are you still here?" He asked.

"Dean, you're sick. I just want to help you. I don't understand why you don't accept the fact that..."

"This is the first time anyone has helped me when I am sick. My father was never there and Sam at first was too young to know what to do. When we grew up I was used to getting by on my own. I'm not ... I'm not used to someone caring about me when I'm not feeling well. " He confessed to you.

"Hey, we're family. We take care of each others." You said with a smile.

He nodded. "It must have been yesterday's rain that did this to me. I feel like my head is exploding." He whispered before he felt your lips on his forehead.

"My mom used to say when I was little that a kiss where it hurt made everything go away." You said.

He laughed. "No, I still feel like shit." He said. "But thank you, really. For everything" He added at the end, before silence fell between you.

"I really meant what I said before." He said after a while.

"Which part?" You asked.

"The "you're beautiful" part." He said.

"Is the fever still talking?" You asked.

"Nope." He responded by grabbing your hand and bringing it to his forehead which was much less hot than before.

"Okay, then I believe you." You smiled.

"I would really like to kiss you, right now." He said.

"You can do it if you want." You answered still smiling.

"I would, but I really have to go throw up." He said before getting up and running to the bathroom.

When he came back to you he was laughing. "Ready for that kiss?"

"Don't even think about it, Winchester!" You said starting to walk away from him. "You just threw up!"

"Oh come on, just one!" He laughed as he started chasing you through the bunker hallways.

#dean winchester x reader #dean x reader #dean x y/n #dean winchester x y/n #dean winchester fic #dean fic #spn fic #supernatural fic #supernatural fanfic #spn fanfic #dean fanfic #dean winchester fanfic #dean winchester fanfiction #dean fanfiction #spn fanfiction #supernatural fanfiction #dean winchester fluff

[awakenthemusic]

Mornin' Sunshine

Cas shuffled into the doorway, looking even more rumpled than usual. The combination of his rucked up hair, stubbled jaw, and the old Zeppelin tee that Dean had loaned him when they'd finally gotten him back from the empty several days ago, which was currently straining to contain Cas' bulging biceps, sent a rush of heat through Dean that had nothing to do with the piping-hot coffee.

Tags: Short fic, ~1,100 words, Destiel, Getting together, Dean uses actual words

For Suptober 2023 Day 9 - Starlight

Under the cut or on Ao3

Dean sighed in contentment as he took his first sip of morning coffee. Jack, Cas, and Eileen were still asleep, Sam was off on one of his runs, and Dean was taking the opportunity to enjoy the quiet in the kitchen.

No sooner had Dean had the thought than Cas shuffled into the doorway, looking even more rumpled than usual. The combination of his rucked up hair, stubbled jaw, and the old Zeppelin tee that Dean had loaned him when they'd finally gotten him back from the empty several days ago, which was currently straining to contain Cas' bulging biceps, sent a rush of heat through Dean that had nothing to do with the piping-hot coffee. (Seriously, when the hell had Cas gotten so ripped?)

With so much to distract him, Dean didn't manage to greet Cas until Cas had already started to pour his own cup of coffee. "Mornin', Sunshine," Dean said, his voice breathier than he would've liked.

Cas stiffened, suddenly setting the coffee carafe down on the counter with a thunk. "I don't..." He trailed off then stood for a long moment in silence, his fingers clenched around the handle of his mug so tight, his knuckles went white.

Finally, he turned around and Dean could see what he'd missed before during his sleepy ogling. Cas looked rough. Dark circles hung under his eyes and he looked haunted in a way that had Dean subconsciously checking for a weapon.

Cas said, "I understand if you don't want to talk about..." He grimaced. "Things."

Dean winced at the reminder of the clusterfuck in the dungeon when the empty claimed Cas, and how it had haunted his dreams ever since.

"But comparing me to the light of your system's star..." Cas frowned. "When you first said it all those years ago, I understood the phrase to be sarcastic. I am definitely not a 'morning person'."

Fuck, when did Cas doing air quotes get so adorable? Focus, Dean.

"But then," Cas continued. "You kept using it and it didn't seem to be sarcastic anymore. I had hoped..." He shook his head. "Now, though, with everything I said... You keep calling me..." Cas slumped, looking more exhausted and dejected than Dean could remember ever seeing him. "I don't understand what you mean. Please, just..."

Guilt slammed into Dean. Cas' haunted look was because of him? He'd been too chicken-shit to talk to Cas about, well much of anything since they'd gotten him back, and now...

"I mean..." Dean swallowed roughly and tried to push past the anxiety twisting in his gut. "I call you sunshine because..." I love you, never leave me again. The words stalled before they got to his throat, just like they always did.

Dean cleared his throat, nerves making him break out in a sweat despite the lingering chill in the underground bunker. C'mon Dean, just answer the fucking question! He opened his mouth and what came out was, "Because you make my day brighter." He wanted to bite back the words as soon as they left his mouth. That's the sappiest fucking thing anybody's ever said, I sound like an idiot!

Dean winced and risked a glance at Cas, sure that the lingering silence was caused by Cas holding back laughter.

Instead, Cas stared at Dean, a slight flush on his cheeks. "I... I do?"

Part of Dean's brain screamed at him to cover, deflect, joke his way the fuck out of this entire conversation, but the hope hiding just behind Cas' eyes left Dean helpless to do anything but nod.

Cas beamed, and if Dean thought the sight of Cas lit him up like the brightest sunshine when Cas was grumpy and rumpled, it was nothing compared to the fucking supernova that lit off in Dean's chest. Cas radiated pure joy, all of it directed at, and entirely because of, Dean. The ache of trying to contain so much in his chest was so strong that Dean felt tears sting at the backs of his eyes.

Suddenly, words were flowing out of Dean. "You always have. All of my plans, anytime I let myself think about the future, nothing's any good without you," He swallowed past the lump in his throat. "When I think about the good times, you're always there. Have been there, for years, you know?"

Cas nodded, his smile gone, but replaced by a wide-eyed look as he hung on every word Dean said.

"You get me, like nobody else ever has. Nobody. You're the only person I have to talk to about the shit that really bothers me, the only one besides Sam I trust to have my back when it counts, you're my..." Best friend, confidante, love of my life, none of the terms fit right, none of them seemed big enough, all of them too small for everything that Cas was to Dean. As soon as he thought of it, it came pouring out of his mouth. "You're my everything."

Dean barely registered the way Cas' breath caught, the energy in his chest flashing over into anger without warning. He was nearly shouting as he bit out, "So, no more deals, you hear me? You don't get to do that again. You don't get to just leave—" The word tore out of Dean's throat, leaving him panting, unable to see past the tears that had welled up without his permission.

This, Dean realized as he gasped for air. This is why I didn't want to talk.

The anger that Dean used as a shield, that helped him deal with feelings when they boiled over out of control like this, suddenly burst like a soap bubble, cutting off with a pathetic whimper, leaving him shaky and stripped down raw. "Don't leave," He whispered. "Please don't leave. I... I need you."

Without another word, Cas yanked Dean into a hug, wrapping both his arms around Dean's shoulders like he could wrap him up and keep him from all the hurt of the world. He whispered, his breath caressing Dean's ear, "I would move heaven, hell, earth, purgatory, and the empty to always stay by your side, Dean."

Dean sobbed out a breath and squeezed his arms around Cas' waist as tight as he could. Cas' arms tightened in response, surrounding Dean in warmth and strength, calling out to the blazing light that had been burning bright in his chest for over a decade. All the words Dean could never say welled up in Dean's throat, ready to choke him again, but this time, when he opened his mouth... "I... I love you, Cas."

The words came out rough and quiet, half-muffled against the soft cotton of Dean's old tee where it stretched over Cas' shoulder, but Cas heard, and squeezed Dean's shoulders so tight it made it hard to breathe.

Dean never wanted to be anywhere else.

#suptober23 #destiel #fanfic #fanfiction #spn #supernatural #myfics

[mercurygray]

⭐, dealer's choice for TDS, please and thank you?

Time to Fess Up Take 2:

This sequence went through A LOT of revisions. This draft cut scene comes directly after Harry's evacuation. I was experimenting with how I could get both Dick and Joan to confess what was going on and decided to try Lewis and Joan. I don't remember exactly why I didn't keep this one - I think it comes off a) as a little too much Lewis/Joan and b) Lewis has far too much of his shit together in this scene, which isn't the headspace he's in during Bastogne and doesn't align with the character as set up previously. I do really like the emotional vulnerability here.

"Joan." She looked up at Lewis, her eyes vacant, lip trembling. Christ, this is bad. "Can you come with me? Want to talk something over with you."

Lewis lifted the tarp on his foxhole like he was holding the door open for dinner, and she slid inside, moving over in the hole so Lew could follow her, tucking the flap. It smelled of earth, of cold, of pine. And as soon as the flap was down, she broke, big, ugly, gashing sobs that half of Belgium could probably hear in the dark, and Lew gathered her up in his arms and simply held her, and let her cry. He could feel her tears hot on his cheeks, his jacket, the first warmth he’d felt all day. Even here, in the middle of winter, there was warmth in something, inside them. Oh, Joanie, how long’s this been in there?  “Hey now. Hey.”

“It's my fault, Lew, I shouldn't have let him light that fire.”

“Joan, you couldn't have known.” It's no one's fault. It’s my fault. Hell, it’s Harry’s fault. “You know who really should be doing this, petting your hair and kissing tears off your cheeks.”

“It's not funny, Lew. We don’t have time for it.” She took a big, shivering sniffle. “If Harry's gone, he's got…Dike, Buck, and...me." She said 'if' like it were possible that Harry would come back from the aid station explaining it had been a splinter, easily fixed, right as rain again. They both knew that wasn't happening. 

“So basically, he has you. He told me about your conversation the other day about Buck. Running yourself into the ground trying to save everyone else from themselves isn't going to do us any favors, either. Come here."

“You're laughing at me.”

“No, I'm laughing at myself," he said, rearranging his arm around her shoulders and rucking the blanket tighter around them. "About a month after you all - the girls - arrived, we were in the officers club one night shooting the shit and got around to talking about - well, you know. Dick wasn’t not having any of it, because that's who he is, and says, Lew, when it's really rough are you going to want Eileen or Joan in your foxhole? Now, Eileen is a beautiful woman, and the USO is lucky to have her, but between the two of you there's no one I'd rather be sat here with consoling.” “You want to bunk down here for the night? Sometimes we just need to be held, Joan.”

“They need me forward.”

“I'll send someone to tell them where you are - and if you utter one more complaint or excuse, woman, I'll tell them all you're in Dick's foxhole and you two looked mighty cozy.”

She sniffled, gave a weak laugh. “You wouldn't.”

“Oh, watch me. We can start another fire with Dick's blushes.”

"What did you tell Lip?"

"I told him Mom and Dad were fighting and you'd decided to run away to Dog Company."

"Lewis!"

"I told him you needed some rest and he could find you here if he needed you. He thanked me for getting you some sleep."

“We don't deserve Carwood Lipton.” 

#director's commentary #the darkening sky

[michaelmilligan]

Helloooo! For the wip thing, how about sabriel fake dating? :)

Hi!! So Sabriel fake dating is pretty much what the title says - Sam and Gabriel pretend to be dating. For completely logical, altruistic reasons, of course. 😌

There's also Saileen in this story, because ultimately my agenda is always Sabrieleena polycule endgame.

Have a snippet of the beginning:

“You're dating who?!” Dean asks, sounding like someone just insulted Baby, or said that cake is better than pie.

“Gabriel.” Sam gestures to the angel next to him, who has been smiling smugly ever since they agreed to do this.

“'Sup, future bro-in-law,” Gabriel says. When Sam glares at him, his grin just widens. “Yeah, Sammy and I are a thing now, better get used to it.”

“Don't call me that,” Sam mutters.

“And why would you-” Dean gestures to Gabriel, then to Sam. “No, why would you-” Finally, he looks to Cas helplessly, who has been frowning all this time.

“What about Eileen?” he asks, very seriously.

“Oh, it's fine. We're on a, you know, a break. Of sorts. Don't worry about it.” Sam can feel himself starting to sweat. Damnit. He pretty much lies professionally, why is this so hard?

“A break?” Dean seems concerned, but he doesn't say anything more, just glares at Gabriel.

“Congratulations?” Adam says from the table, where he's still playing UNO with Michael. They barely looked up at Sam and Gabriel when they announced they had something to say, and he doesn't look at all bothered by the fact that Sam is supposedly dating the brother of the archangel who is possessing him.

Michael frowns at his cards, then puts one on the pile in the middle.

“Another reverse card?? You have got to be cheating,” Adam complains, grinning when Michael glares at him.

“I don't cheat,” Michael informs him. “... much.”

Adam rolls his eyes, but he's still smiling. It's almost cute, the way the two interact as if they've known each other for years. (Which, okay, at this point they have, even if you don't count how time works in the cage.) The thing is, that's all they're doing – playing games, watching movies, smiling at each other dopily. Sam has never even seen them hold hands, much less kiss, even though there is clearly something between them.

Same for Cas and Dean, really. Even after beating God and getting actual free will, those two are still dancing around each other. Somehow, Sam always thought that once all the obstacles were removed, especially once it wasn't Chuck's story anymore, they would figure it out quickly. But instead it's worse now. Cas seems to be keeping a distance from all of them while he waits for Jack to return from Heaven, and Dean has been throwing himself into hunt after hunt, even though he used to talk about retiring after all the God stuff was over.

And that's exactly why Sam is doing this. Maybe if his brothers see that it's possible to date an angel, they'll finally get their shit together and start doing it themselves.

#Sam is going to get such a good grade at being a brother #He's being soooo selfless lol #It's not that he wants to smooch Gabriel of course. Haha. Why would you think that... #Sabriel #Destiel #Midam #Quick writing #Fake dating #Michael definitely cheats at playing cards that guy is ruthless #I'm still debating with myself if Mary should be in this

[liron-ao3]

Best birthday ever

Dean steps on the gas, Baby's wheels spinning. He feels alive like he hasn't for a long time. The wind ruffles his hair, and Dean smirks.

He's free. Chuck is gone, Jack is in charge, and Sam and Eileen are choosing the colour for the nursery. Everyone he loves is back and safe. Yes, everyone.

This time, it wasn't Lucifer on the phone. Dean is sure of it. The shy "Hello, Dean" was the real deal. And now, he's heading East on a nearly spring-like, sunny January day to the place where they first talked.

No, not the barn. Too many above and below know about their first meet-up. Not the details, of course. No one will ever know how Castiel had seen through him as if Dean were wearing his fears and doubts on the cuffs of his sleeves. And no one will ever know that Castiel started to fall right then and there, first from grace and then for him, maybe both at the same time.

Dean doesn't know when he knew, maybe never truly until Castiel spoke his truth. Dean has rewound the footage from the dungeon so many times that it would have been destroyed a long time ago if it had been on tape.

Maybe it was masochistic, but Dean couldn't not scratch the wound, reopen it, again and again.

I love you.

Dean drums the beat to 'Getaway car' on Baby's steering wheel. God, what they've done to each other over the years, never getting the timing, the words right, passing each other so often until their dance around another was more familiar than anything else.

But not this time. Baby isn't a getaway car. No. She brings him closer and closer to the man he loves, and Dean doesn't care about all the stupid small and big things that held him back before. Because Castiel was right. They were real—the joy as much as the heartbreak, the mourning and Dean's heart splitting open his chest at their reunions, just as much as it breaking into a million pieces every fucking time he lost him.

But this is in the past now. Dean prayed every day since Jack left them back on earth, tried to live up to Castiel's passing words. He prayed to him, too, just in case. He hopes at least the first ones didn't reach him. Praying when you're drunk and out of your mind from grief likely doesn't make the best of prayers.

The gas station looks frozen in time. Everything is equally dead and alive simultaneously as it was all those years ago. Maybe it's telling that Castiel spoke his first words to Dean here. Was he already going off Chuck's script? Dean wouldn't be surprised.

He parks the Impala where the car he stole once stood. His heart beats stumbling against his ribcage. Was he wrong? Was it just another trap from god-knows-who?

One might think that a man who has waited more than a year for this day might be patient enough for a few more hours, if need be.

But doubt is creeping up at Dean, taking his heart into a tight grip. Even if it was the real Castiel on the phone, is he still the same who left him? It couldn't have been so difficult to pull the angel out of the Empty. Chuck did it with Lucifer, too. What has taken the kid so long?

Dean dozes off after driving here without a break. He dreams of Castiel on the passenger seat, smiling, reaching for his hand. And Dean? He lets him.

He wakes from a flapping sound, and there he is, in the flesh, smiling, just like a second ago in Dean's dream.

And Dean's not prepared for it at all. The longing, the dark shadows of his grief. Not even after all this time. All the sweet things he imagined to say dissipate into thin air.

"What the hell took you so long?" he blurts out.

Castiel chuckles. "I was waiting at your grave."

Dean stares at him for a long moment before he bursts out in laughter. "You're kidding."

"No, you said 'Meet me where you first talked to me.' That was there. But I guess you don't remember."

Dean huffs a laugh. Once again, they passed each other, miscommunication, different perspectives, the whole shit they pulled off a million times before.

"We're two dumbasses," he says.

"This time, I agree," Castiel replies, giving Dean a lopsided smile, and dammit! There's nothing Dean wouldn't do to see it for the rest of his life.

"The kid restored you?"

"I'm in full grace again," Castiel confirms.

"Good," Dean says, biting the inside of his cheek.

Castiel's hand touches his that is white-knuckling the steering wheel, Dean's grip melting away in a split second. They lace their fingers together as if they had done it before. It's beautifully weird.

"When will you return to heaven?" Dean asks because he may dampen the atmosphere, but it might hurt less if he knows right from the start.

"When you're leaving," Castiel says.

Dean nods, biting back the tears pricking his eyes. It's okay. The only important thing is that Castiel is alive and free. It must be enough. Dean can't be selfish.

A tender hand cups his cheek, and a thumb brushes away the stray tear that escaped his control.

Dean sobs just once but from the bottom of his heart. They could have had it all along, and he wasted precious years with doubts and unspoken words.

"It's not really a place to stay, so…"

"Earth isn't so bad, Dean," Castiel interjects. "I mean Heaven is much nicer now. I think you'll like it, but…"

"What are you talking about, man?"

Castiel looks at him with sorrowful eyes. "I know the darkness in you, Dean, but I thought…" He looks out of the window into space. "There's so much life to be lived, Dean. It's yours now. No Chuck shuffling the cards. You could drive to the coast or build a cabin in the mountains or whatever you're dreaming of."

Castiel's eyes burn with sadness when he looks back at Dean again, and the hunter's heart squeezes painfully in his chest.

"Sure. I know. I had just hoped…" Dean's eyes fall on their joint hands, brow furrowing. He doesn't get it.

"Dean," Castiel says, voice cracking under the syllable. "Please, don't…"

"What? I won't make it hard on you. Promise."

Castiel huffs a mirthless laugh. "I'll never be ready to see you die, but I had hoped that me coming back that you might want to stick around a little longer, see your nephew grow up. Maybe I misunderstood your prayers."

Castiel pulls back his hand, but Dean holds on to it as if he had the power to keep an angel from leaving.

"I love you, Cass."

"Then live for me, Dean."

Dean's frown forges deeper lines into his face. "Are we having two different conversations here?" he asks. I'd be fitting for them, after all.

Castiel blinks at him. "I… I had hoped you wanted me to spend your life with you."

"I do," Dean all but shouts.

"Then why… oh." Castiel laughs out loud, the lines around his eyes crinkling beautifully. "Dumbasses. I should get us shirts. I heard couples wear matching things," he says, scanning the hunter carefully.

Dean shakes his head. "Nobody rocks a trenchcoat as you do," he says and quirks a lopsided smile.

"I think it's time to retire this one, anyway," Castiel states.

"Really?"

Castiel's eyes flicker away from Dean's.

"Are you blushing?" Dean teases.

"Angels don't blush, Dean."

"Sure, they don't," Dean snickers. "So… you're gonna stay?"

Castiel nods. "As long as you want me to."

"Good," Dean says, butterflies storming his stomach. "Forever then." He raises Castiel's hand to his lips and presses a kiss on the back, because, honestly, fuck it!

Castiel beams at him, and it easily puts the sun to shame.

Dean starts the motor and puts the car into reverse. He steps on the gas, Baby's wheels spinning. He feels alive like he hasn't for a long time. The wind ruffles their hair, and Dean smirks.

Yes. This is the best birthday ever.

#happy birthday dean winchester #fix it #Destiel #Deancas #Destiel fandom #Deancas fandom #Destiel fic #Deancas fic #Destiel fanfic #Deancas fanfic #Destiel fanfiction #Deancas fanfiction #Destiel oneshot #Deancas oneshot

[i-call-me-clarence]

@fluffbruary prompt day 13: cold | nacreous | soup

Fandom: Supernatural

Dean and Cas sat in fold-out chairs on the beach, the water too cold to take a dip in, but the view breathtaking. Sam was supposed to join them, but he ended up taking a last-minute trip with Eileen up to an old cabin of Bobby's.

So it was just the two of them.

Dean didn't mind.

“Damn would you look at this view,” Dean said, taking a sip of his drink, which wasn't a beer for once, but a ginger ale. Cas' orders.

“It is very nice,” Cas agreed, nodding his head and sipping on his own ginger ale, he seemed to drink whenever Dean did. Dean found it kinda funny, kinda endearing. Just like Cas.

“And look at those clouds, man. Friggin gorgeous.”

At this Castiel blushed. Dean could see it from his periphery.

Dean turned to look at him fully.

“You alright, buddy?” Maybe he was getting heatstroke, even though it was at the tail end of winter and fifty degrees outside. But who knew with half-powered Angels.

“I…yes.”

Well, that was convincing.

“Yeah, not buying it. What's up?”

Cas let out a flustered sigh, “The clouds…they look like my wings.”

“Your wings?” Dean looked back out at the clouds in question, “Look like that?”

“Remarkably so, yes.”

“Damn,” Dean smiled, taking another drink, “Wish I could see ‘em.”

Castiel turned to Dean, a question in his eyes.

“What?” Dean grunted.

“Would you like to?”

“Like to what?”

“See them.”

Dean's mouth dropped open, eyes going wide, “Like for real?”

“Um…yes?”

“Since when?”

“Uh, what?”

“Your wings, Cas! How long have you been holding out on me? All I've seen are some shadowy bits that lasted for half a second, and you're tellin' me I can see ‘em full-frontal?”

“I…” Cas scrunched his eyebrows together, “You never asked.”

“Dude!” Dean scoffed and shook his head, then he pinned Cas with his eyes, holding out a hand to drive the point home, “I always wanna see the cool Angel stuff…” he tilted his head a bit, “You got a halo I don't know about?”

At this Cas chuckled, “No halo, no,” then he paused for a beat, looked around the deserted beach, “But if you would like I can show you my wings now.”

“Now? There isn’t some, like spell or ritual or something you gotta do?”

“No,” Castiel laughs.

“Well, then. Bring ‘em out!”

Castiel stands, walking several paces away, and turns to face Dean, his shy smile melts into a face of concentration and the air around him begins to shimmer.

Lightning cracks strike the ground around Cas, causing Dean to fumble and spill his drink.

“Holy—“ Dean starts but is cut off by two beautiful wings unfurling from Cas’ back. “Shit,” he finishes in awe.

Cas was right, his wings almost blend into the multi colored clouds, with splotches of pink, orange, mint green, yellow, and purple. They stand out because of the iridescent shimmering, like an oil slick,  as Cas moves his wings, holding them out high and proud.

“Cas,” Dean gasps breathlessly.

Castiel is smiling, he knows his wings are beautiful. And so does Dean.

“Cas…” Dean blinks, stands up, “Cas, you're gorgeous.”

At this Castiel's wings do a funny shakey thing and the feathers puff out. Dean's not sure what it means, but going by the smile Cas is trying to hide by biting his lips, and how red his face is, Dean is thinking it's a good thing.

Dean walks closer.

“Can I…"

“Yes?” Castiel titls his head.

Dean is standing right in front of Cas now, he swallows, “Can I touch them?”

Castiel's mouth pops open in a gasp. He doesn't say anything, just shuts his mouth, eye wide, and nods.

Dean reaches out once in an aborted move, feeling overwhelmed by the size and grace of Cas' wings, at just how alive they are. Castiel moves his left wing closer in invitation. Dean makes another attempt, slowly moving his hand, the tips of his fingers lightly graze those mother of pearl feathers.

The moment Dean makes contact, Castiel, eyes closed, shudders, and then Cas' wing is pushing up against Dean's hand, until it's completely engulfed in the feathers.

Dean lets out a surprised laugh, “They're so soft…”

“Thank you,” Castiel said proudly, puffing up his chest a bit, “It takes time, but I like to groom them often.”

“How come I've never seen you–I mean, you pop in on me in the shower all the time–”

“When there's an emergency.”

“But I've never so much as seen your wings, let alone walked in on you brushing them out or whatever.”

“It's a very private ritual," Castiel says sheepishly.

“So's a shower,” Dean watched as his hand brushed along the feathers. One was a little crooked, unthinkingly Dean straightened it.

Castiel let out a long breath.

“That hurt?” Dean's hand paused.

“No,” Castiel shook his head. His eyes were closed as he looked at the ground, “No, it felt good. That feather was bugging me.”

"Oh,” Dean nodded, turning back to the wings, “Not to be a dick, but I kinda think you suck at grooming.”

Castiel's head snapped up, sourpuss on his face.

“I mean, there's crooked feathers everywhere, buddy.’

“I…” Castiel blushed again, looking embarrassed. “Some feathers are harder to reach than others.”

“I mean, it's no big deal, they're still the coolest damned things I've ever seen. But…” Dean hesitated, licked his lips. They had literally just compared wing grooming to showering, but Dean just didn't see how personal it could really be if Cas was letting him touch them like this. “I could help you out. If you want.”

Castiel had that same look on his face as when Chastity had led him away from their table at that brothel. Dean’s not sure why he thought of that particular instance, but Cas looked terrified.

Before Dean could take it back, or withdraw his hand, Castiel nodded, swallowed, and let out a gravel-filled, “Okay,” voice pitched so low Dean swore he could feel it reverberate through his wings and into Dean's fingers.

“Okay,” Dean echoed.

Dean turned to face his work as he began straightening the errant feathers, running his hands over the others along the way to smooth everything out.

Castiel made the occasional grunt of approval. Dean felt like he was giving the guy a shoulder rub or something. Probably equaled out to the same thing.

When he was done, Dean was breathing heavy. Then he noticed Cas was as well.

“All better?” Dean asked, voice soft.

“Yes, Dean, that was…thank you.”

“No–” Dean's voice cracked, “No problem.”

They stared at each other for a moment before Dean said, “Whelp,” smacking his legs, and then nothing else.

Castiel cleared his throat, “I should probably…” he motioned to his wings.

Dean got the gist, “Oh, yeah, be my guest,” he said with a lame smile.

Castiel smiled back, and his wings began to disappear like sand falling, leaving behind a faint iridescent shimmer in the air, before it was like they had never been there at all.

“Wow,” That was almost cooler than when they came out,” Dean said in awe.

“...Thank you?”

Dean gave a little ‘heh' and then patted Cas on the shoulder, “Man we gotta do that again some time.” he said with the biggest open smile on his face, making his crows feet into deep lines.

“Alright,” Castiel answered softly, almost shyly.

Dean gave him a look but didn't question it too much.

The sun was nearly set by that point, so they decided to pack up and hit the road.

They found a motel not too much later, and as they checked in, fate dealt them a sour hand.

There was only one bed.

The end

This fic is also available over on AO3! Thanks for reading! <3

#fluffbruary #destiel #destiel ficlet #castiel's wings #supernatural

[thetrap]

why i think deancas just might go canon

i’ve been wanting to write this for a bit, but i haven’t really had the time until now. basically this is just a super unorganized collection of thoughts i have on why i think that dean and castiel actually have a fairly decent shot of becoming canon (and by decent shot i mean like.....a solid 5% chance. and that’s being generous). this is based off of the show itself (obviously), quotes from andrew dabb, and other things.

1. andrew dabb is deancas positive

i made a post a while back that never made it out of the drafts, but it was basically a summation of all the good deancas shit dabb has given us as a writer. here are the bullet points:

- the hug/"i'm not leaving here without you!" moment in purgatory (8x02) 

- "don't lose it over one man"

- "he's in love.....with humanity"

- cas/colette parallel ("dean. stop.") in 10x22

- just the fight scene from the prisoner in general like......wow

- sam/jess and dean/cas parallel in 12x23

- "we've lost everything......and now, you're gonna bring him back" + dean's just generally overwhelming grief in 13x01

- "and how is it that you lost dean? i thought the two of you were joined at the.....you know, everything"

and these are just the big moments.

also notable is the fact that an activist sent dabb (and some of the other producers of spn i think) a book about dean and cas and why the fans want it/why it would be a good thing for the show. a few years later, meghan fitzmartin (who wrote the most recent episode!) was hired as dabb’s assistant, went into his office and posted a tweet a with pictures of the book, saying something along the lines of “doing some reading for work!”

the fact that dabb actually kept a fanmade deancas book for years.....the fact that he’s consistently written episodes with really strong subtext for years.....the fact that the dean and castiel romantic tension has only picked up since he took over as showrunner (mixtape, lily sunder, cas’s death, dean’s grief arc, the entirety of season fifteen, etc.)......idk i just think it’s really interesting that there has been such a marked shift since he was put in charge.

2. the mixtape

i know this was a few seasons ago, but it’s still relevant because like. a mixtape is not platonic. this scene was not platonic. full-stop.

and it’s not even the act by itself; it’s also the dialogue!! “it was a gift. you keep those.” this is more than likely a direct callback to aragorn and arwen in lord of the rings (that’s the first thing i thought of, at least).

the fact that dabb let this slide, like......he knows what this looks like. berens and glynn, who wrote this episode, know what it looks like. they knew precisely how this would be perceived, and then wrote and aired the scene anyways.

and that’s not even getting into the camerawork. like what?? was this shot???

yeah so. definitely not platonic.

3. the trap

honestly i thought about just posting this part of this overlong essay thing, because to me, this is the episode where i went okay, so this might actually happen.

there are SO many things in this episode that made me go insane the first time i watched it (”i left, but you didn’t stop me”) but the thing that stuck out to me the most was dean’s reaction to castiel saying, “you don’t have to say it. i heard your prayer,” when dean tries to tell him something.

like?????? he does not look relieved!! nor does he look particularly happy!!

hell, if you go back and watch the video you can literally see him swallow his words down like....jensen ackles is the master of micro expressions and that shit is Not Accidental. this moment 100% gives the vibe that there is something that is not being said. the camera following dean as he gives cas a lingering look is really interesting too.

3. dabb’s comments about dean and cas in season 15

this part is actually sort of related to the point above, since a lot of dabb’s comments are in reference to “the trap.” here are some interesting ones that i want to point out:

But the Leviathan won’t be the focal point of the purgatory story. Rather, it’s about what Dean and Castiel are going through. “They’re not going to resolve the emotional stuff, but it allows them to redefine their friendship a little bit in light of what’s happened especially earlier this season,” Dabb says. (x)

the key thing here is that dabb said that, in 15x09, dean and cas are “not going to resolve the emotional stuff.”

now. i don’t know about you, but dean falling to his knees, praying to cas and weeping feels a lot like emotional resolution to me. like, sure, things will probably be awkward between them for a while, but surely this is the peak moment of their emotional vulnerability with each other, right? surely this is the moment where they’ve resolved the issue between them? like how the fuck does it get more intensely emotional than this??

yet dabb seems to be implying that it will, which leaves us with the million dollar question: what is left about dean and cas’ relationship to resolve?

keep in mind that as of 15x16, there hasn’t been much forward movement on that front; that is, we’ve had some cute moments between them, but in terms of serious conversation about their relationship, there’s been basically nothing. so we can assume that this development, whatever it is, will occur in 15x18, since dean and cas will be separated for most of 15x17, as cas will be off with sam.

aka the episode where cas will likely get yanked away by the empty. aka the episode with the teary (!!!) conversation we saw in the promo between dean and cas.

also notable from the above quote is dabb saying that dean and cas are redefining their friendship. like....redefining how? to what?? that wording is just really interesting to me.

another quote from dabb re “the trap”:

(x)

it forces them to “start that process.” indicating yet again that the prayer scene between dean and cas is not the moment where whatever is between them is resolved. yet, from where we are right now, dean and cas seem mostly fine. which means that whatever they have yet to work out doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with their fight.

lastly:

a really significant chunk of what happens to dean in 15x09 is him confronting his issues with cas. don’t get me wrong - there are other important things that happen in the episode - but the fact that an episode where so much time/emotional energy is given to dean and cas’ dynamic is considered a turning point for dean is very notable and, to me, speaks to the importance of their relationship for the rest of the season.

4. dean/cas and sam/eileen being set up as units

i’m of the opinion that sam and dean will (by choice) go their separate ways at the end of the show. i think this for a variety of reasons that i wrote about here, and to add onto this, i think that dean/cas and sam/eileen are, in a way, being set up as two units.

this theory comes from two points:

1. the fact that eileen got brought back at all

this isn’t to say that eileen isn’t an interesting character all on her own/outside of her romance with sam, but the fact that they brought her back and then proceeded to set her up in this romance feels really significant to me. what’s especially interesting is how, even after she leaves in 15x09, we get a continuation of their romance in 15x14. i don’t necessarily think that she’s sam’s endgame in the sense that the final episode will show sam going to her or whatever, but i do think that part of the reason she was brought back was so that sam would have someone who he loves/someone he could potentially build a life with after he and dean defeat chuck.

2. the way the two couples were portrayed in “the trap”

like....just watch the future scenes in the bunker. there’s very much a sense that these are two couples living together. and “ever since the mark made cas go crazy, ever since i had to bury him in a ma’lak box.” note the use of i, not we. and then dean/cas and sam/eileen are directly paralleled when dean tells sam he needs to give it up after eileen’s death, comparing it to how dean has given it up after having to bury cas in the ma’lak box.

5. dean does not do Well without cas

this is probably an understatement. there have been a couple of notable instances in this season where the viewer is given a glimpse of what happens to dean when cas dies/is in danger of death/is separated from dean (in case the whole ass widower arc in s13 wasn’t enough).

two of these are from “the trap”:

1. dean freaking out/crying/praying when he’s separated from cas in purgatory

2. dean giving up on life/hunting after burying cas in the ma’lak box in the future world

3. dean’s reaction to cas temporarily going to the empty in 15x13

the one i want to spend the most time on is number two, in large part because sam was witness to it and i think that this might get brought up in 15x17.

part of my spec for that episode is that cas will tell sam about his deal/sam will find out somehow, and in reaction sam might tell cas about how dean reacted to his death in s13 - a conversation that was notably absent from the show when cas finally returned in 13x05. i also think that he might mention no. 2 above, basically telling cas that if he dies, dean is done. that he won’t be able to handle it/move past it. the show has been telling us this over and over for a while now, and it’s only been emphasized more in season 15. i think that 15x17 is the episode where this will finally be verbally expressed.

to me, all of this emphasis on dean giving up when cas is gone isn’t for nothing. in my opinion, it’s being done very purposefully to set up an endgame where dean and cas are together in some sense of the word. and a lot of what i’ve said above is what makes me think it’ll be a Romantic together.

5. bobo berens’ three part deancas saga

so we all know that berens is pretty much spn’s foremost deancas warrior, and what i want to point out here is how this season has been utilizing him as a writer.

this season, berens has three solo episodes (he wrote “galaxy brain” with meredith glynn):

1. the rupture

2. the trap

3. despair (formerly known as “the truth”)

so far, these first two episodes have had major deancas moments. you could even label them as:

1. the rupture (the breakup)

2. the trap (the reconciliation)

3. depair (???)

keep in mind also that berens wrote 14x18, where the dean and cas sort of had a preliminary breakup. he’s been in charge of this arc for a while, and the fact that so much of his writing this season has been deancas focused.......i don’t know, i just think it’s significant in part because, while berens has always been deancas positive, he also writes plenty of episodes that aren’t focused on dean and cas. but now, in the final season, the dean and cas emotional arc has been handed to him, and it’s been the primary focus on his writing.

(sidenote: berens was promoted to executive producer for this final season)

to me, this is all leading to a big moment between dean and cas in 15x18 - and the fact that it was at one point called “the truth,” only to be switched back to despair - makes me think that there will be some sort of confession involved. my money is on cas being the one to say it (especially since this would line up with the leak), especially given the glimpse we saw of (what might be) this moment in the promo. which leads me to...

6. cas does not cry

i saved this for last because the promo where we see teary-eyed cas is actually what pulled me back into this shitshow.

cas does not cry. like. ever. he got a little teary in 15x15, when jack told him of his plan to sacrifice himself, but we have never - never - seen him shed actual tears. and in the promo, particularly that shot where cas says “you have fought for this whole world,” it 100% looks like cas is about to cry cry.

cas has seen his son die. he has seen dean die. he died himself, over and over and over. and we have never seen him cry.

yet for some reason, in this moment of vulnerability with dean, he’s crying. i find it highly unlikely that cas would cry because of his impending death, for a number of reasons (for one, he wouldn’t want to upset dean more than he has to). so, assuming he’s not crying because of his own death, then what is making cas so emotional that he is genuinely crying for the first time in the twelve seasons he has been on the show?

my guys.....i can only think of one thing.

#THIS IS SO FUCKING LONG OH MY GOD #i'm so sorry for this i just have SO many thoughts about this and had to get them all down #disclaimer: i still think it's highly unlikely we'll get confirmed romantic deancas #but i do think there's a chance #and this is why #deancas #destiel #s15 spoilers #spec

[maraudersbutmuggle]

Halloween, 2016. Part 1.

This is the alternative version of the horrible events of Halloween 1981. Don't worry they won't be as angsty as the original. This is kind of the climax of my story. I want to finish with this. And then write events from before to complement the story. And then keep up with random stuff about my Universe.

Content Warning: Insanity, Sick Obsession, Harassment, Violence, Bullying.

Snape:

December, 2015

Life was unfair, Severus thought. Sometimes evil seemed stronger than good. Sometimes life was too hard to handle. Especially without Lily Evans.

"Welcome to Zen Pharmacy"

Severus' boss had explicitly told him to smile to costumers. But how could he smile if his life was miserable.

"I would like those diapers..." the old lady in the counter pointed behind. "Robby is starting to wet the bed..."

Severus sighed. Seriously, what was the point of studying in one of the most prestigious schools, if he was going to end up selling diapers to elder people.

"I want pills for my stomach... I have too many gases..."

This was not going to be temporal. Severus was planning something big.

The Rightful Prince had to pretend to be a merchant in town. Meddle between popular plebs. Otherwise The Vicious King would find him, and kill him. And he couldn't let Lady Flower in his hands forever...

"Excuse me, sir..." the old lady spoke again "Can you help me carry my bags to my car?"

Severus sighed again.

On his walk home, Severus tried calling Mulciber again.

The Prince was searching for an strategy. Something to help him reach the castle unnoticed. But his former friends turned to be The King's spies. They had betrayed him...

"Hello?"

"Hi, Mulciber... It's me"

"Me who?"

Severus rolled his eyes.

"Me Severus..."

"Oh hello man, we haven't seen each other since Hogwarts. How are you?"

Severus clenched his teeth.

"We spoke last week, remember?"

In that very precise moment, a boy in the bus started crying. Not only crying but yelling. And he was next to Severus.

"Shit..." Severus murmured "Do you have it?" he spoke to the phone.

"What?"

"THE JOB MULCIBER!" Severus yelled "You told me your father can get me a job"

"Oh yeah..." Mulciber said, then he asked "What's that sound?"

The little boy was yelling even harder. And his stupid mother was not doing anything about it.

"Nothing... So?"

"Sorry, Snape..." Mulciber sniffed "There's no chance. You know how difficult it is"

Not for them. Not for the rich brats who had assured jobs from their daddies.

"Can you at least talk to your father?" Snape tried "I was a KNIGHT! I thought I was your friend"

Severus had done nasty things for that mother fucker.

"Yeah... I'll let you know as soon as a vacancy is open...."

"Okay but..."

But Mulciber had already hung up. Severus groaned.

There were some beasts amongst The Prince. Most of them were corrupted by the King. By his dark magic. The Prince needed to restore everything to normal. But he had to be patient.

Severus got home. He had left his parents after graduation because he couldn't stand Tobias anymore. The freaking monster. The monster that Eileen used to love. Or still did. Severus had tried to take her with him. But she refused. Eileen reminded Severus of Lily. Nice ladies in love with monsters.

He reached his room. And there it was. The wall. Severus' room looked like the police department. Photographs. Connected dots. Pinpointed information about the enemy. The Marauders. Especially Potter. Their movements. Relationships. Work places. Unis. The pubs they frequented. Severus needed to know everything to attack.

***

The Vicious King and his courtship walked around The Kingdom Hogwarts with such elegance, smirking. They acted like saints when all of their crimes could send them to an eternity of flames in hell.

The Vicious King. The Vain Knight. The Slow Servant. And the Horrible Beast. They called themselves: The Marauders. And The Prince would stare. Useless watched how they corrupted this earth.

"Alright, Snivellus?" The King would say when he spotted him. Always dragging attention to himself.

"Alright, Evans?" he would smirk at Lady Flower next. He was furious that she was the only lady in the kingdom that didn't succumb to his power.

"Bad now that you are here" Lady Flower spat. The Prince had admired her courage.

The courtship of morouns was laughing. Mocking everything as they used to.

The King got furious.

"At least I smell nicer than your boyfriend" he said "You know the showers can actually be used, Snivy? They are not for decor"

The other three giggled. The Servant was drooling in delight with his master. And the Beast was silent. Ready to be instructed to attack. The Beast was The Knight's favorite pet.

"Shame, Potter" Lady Flower used her power "You actually take a shower but it doesn't work!"

"Just leave it, Lily" The Prince wanted her as far away as possible. The King's power could get to her.

"Don't worry. We are nice people. Are we not?" The Knight dared to speak "We're going to teach you Snivy how to take a bath"

The Knight walked closer. And The Prince fought the urge to cut his head with his sword. But he was ready for battle.

"First you apply some... soup" The Knight threw a spell at him. Liquid soap that burned his eyes.

The Prince didn't see it coming. But now the King and the rest were amused by The Prince's humiliation.

"You twat!" Lady Flower yelled.

"Well instructed, Padfoot" The King adored his Knight "And then comes the water..."

And the spell of cold water fell on The Prince. He hadn't seen the bottle in the King's robes.

They laughed. Everyone in the Kingdom. In unison. And The Prince knew they had been already contaminated.

"ASSHOLES!"

Expect for Lady Flower.

"Are you okay, Sev?"

The Prince coughed. But he was fine. He was sad to have lost his kingdom. At least he still had Lady Flower.

But Severus didn't have her anymore. He could only observe her from the distance. No touch. No contact. He was a coward.

He was thinking about talking to her finally. Something casual. This could be his chance. She was alone. Walking through the streets of London. She had met her sister previously. Another beast, Petunia was.

So Severus saw her enter a grocery store near by. And he decided to intervene.

Lady Flower looked the same. But The Prince could see the dark magic in her eyes. He knew she was cursed. And the King got her captured. But The Prince needed to talk to her. At least once.

"Lily?"

Lily turned and blinked in surprise when she saw him.

Severus chuckled.

"What a surprise seeing you here. I almost didn't recognise you"

Lily smiled awkwardly.

It was normal. The spell was too strong to break.

"Hi Sev..." she looked around.

The Prince tried again.

"I haven't seen you since Hogwarts..."

"A year ago, yes" Lily nodded "How are you?"

Always so kind.

"I'm alright" he smiled "You know, working. Trying to survive"

"You didn't go to Uni?"

"I didn't have the money" Severus looked down "But I'm trying to gather it. You?"

"I study Journalism..."

"Like you wanted to"

Lily smiled and nodded shyly.

"That's nice"

If only The Prince could take her somewhere apart. To try and break the spell. But he needed to make sure The King was not around.

"Are you still with... Potter?"

Severus knew she was. He had seen them together. Walking to the movies. Or sharing a meal. Even kissing in Potter's car. He was sick.

"Yeah..." Lily licked her lips, nervously.

"Cool..." Severus tried to be as normal as possible. He needed to have Lily in good terms "Is he around?"

"Nah... He's at work" Lily said "Effie asked my to buy some apples for her famous apple pie"

Severus faked a smile.

"You live with The Potters now?"

This was worse than The Prince had expected. Lady Flower had been moved to the main tower. And The King probably had servants to watch over her.

"Temporarily..." Lily snorted.

Severus nodded.

"Hey... It's nice to see you again, Lily" Severus smiled "I've missed you"

Lily sighed "Sev..."

"Don't worry. I won't try anything bad" he said "I'm glad you're happy with Potter" all lies "And I've changed. I want to be a better man. Someone new. I don't even talk to the Knights anymore" that in part was true.

Lily simply nodded.

"Would you want to grab a coffee with me?" Severus tried "Just to catch up"

"I don't know..."

"Come on" Severus said "We can be friends again. Like we used to..."

Lily looked reluctant.

"God knows I need a friend now..." Severus sighed.

The spell was there. But Lady Flower was pure kindness. She wouldn't say no to let a helping hand to the unfortunate souls.

"Okay..." she said "Why not?"

Severus smiled "Really?"

Lily smiled too "Yeah. I need a friend too"

The Prince tried to remember that Lady Flower was indeed bewitched. She looked like the docil, beautiful and wonderful woman he used to remember. Lady Flower used to love him. They had sworn to always be together under the moonlight, naked after intense hours of passion.

Okay no. Severus wished. Not even a kiss. But maybe soon.

"I work at Zen's" Severus was saying "The Pharmacy... It's actually a decent job. The clients love me"

They had talked for 20 minutes and Severus could not tell her that he was miserable. It was part of the strategy.

"That's nice, Sev"

"How's Uni?"

"It's nice..." Lily smiled "People are fun to be around. Teachers are excellent. And really I love my career"

"I know. It was your dream to be a journalist" Severus said "I'm happy you are making it true"

"Thank you" Lily took a sip of her coffee.

"Do you still see people from Hogwarts?"

"Just my friends"

I used to be your friend. Severus thought.

"The boys. And Mary, Marlene and Dorcas" she continued "Sometimes I see Alice and Frank. Remember them? Oh and Edgar. But not so much... You?"

"No one"

Severus knew how The Knights still gathered. And made crazy parties. But they never invited him. Never. He had no one.

He had worshiped The Knights to be someone in life. To have a bright future ahead of him. But that hadn't happened. And he had lost Lily in the process.

No. It had been The King's work. Lady Flower would still be his if it wasn't for The Vicious King.

The Prince would get rid of him.

"I'm sorry to hear that..."

"Don't worry about it" Severus said "I reckon the only real friend I had was you"

Lily stared at him with pity and concern.

"Maybe we can be friends now" she tried.

Severus' strategy was working. He just have to play his cards right...

"I'd like that..."

"Okay..." Lily chuckled "There's something you need to know then"

Severus had hope. Maybe he could get her back. He just have to follow his plan and....

"I'm pregnant"

No. No No No No. The Prince had thought about the atrocities The King must've been doing to Lady Flower. But he forgot about that tiny detail. That was the worst thing that The Vicious King had done until now. Of course... He wanted an heir. To continue corrupting the Kingdom . Him and all his descendants. But mate with Lady Flower? His Lady Flower. The Prince was definitely going to kill him. He would go to the end of world to destroy that evil man.

Severus was in shock. He blinked hard. He was surely going to have a heart attack.

"Sev?" Lily asked concerned.

"You're so stupid!"

"Excuse me?"

"How could you let him do that to you?" Severus said "He ruined your life..."

Lily snorted "I can't believe it"

"Lily you're nineteen" Severus continued "You are studying a career. You're brilliant. You have a future ahead of you. And you're going to ruin that for child?"

"I'm such an idiot..." Lily said "It always happens"

Severus looked at her confused.

"I always want to see the best in you. And I always want to believe you. And I just don't fucking understand how horrible you actually are..."

No. No. No. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Severus was doing so well. Fuck... He had gotten so angry that he had opened his stupid mouth.

But this definitely changed plans. The Prince not only had to get Lady Flower back. And kill The King. But also, get rid of that child before it was born.

Lily stood up.

"I'm leaving..."

"No... Lily. I'm sorry... Wait..."

"NO!" Lily yelled "I'm tired of always falling into the same trap. You know? All this time, I wondered about you. If you were okay. If you had found someone. If you were happy" she snorted, and shook her head "I'm so stupid... And you keep hurting me. You're just a selfish wanker, who didn't even care about me. James is right. You're not worth trying..."

Severus felt an immense rage. He had brainwashed her mind. It was all his fault. HIS HIS AND ONLY HIS. James Freaking Potter had ruined Lily's life. He had ruined Severus' life. And he had broke them apart.

Lady Flower was not the same that The Prince fell in love with. Maybe she was gone forever.

"I said wait, Lily!" Severus grabbed Lily's arm tightly.

"Sev... Let me go..." Lily protested, He didn't listen "Severus, you're hurting me!"

"Is everything okay?"

Severus hadn't noticed how furiously he was staring at Lily. How he was hurting her arm. And how she looked at him in fear. He only noticed when the cashier of the coffee shop approach them.

Severus immediately let her go.

"Was this man hurting you, Miss?" he asked Lily.

Lily rubbed her arm. And looked at Severus like she didn't recognize him.

"No sir... Don't worry" Lily said "I was just leaving"

"I wasn't doing anything. We're friends. Right?"

"Not anymore" Lily answered. With tears in her eyes. "We are done"

"Lily we were talking about your pregnancy...."

But Lily was walking to the door already.

"Lily I overreacted.... Lily..."

Severus tried to go after her. But the cashier stopped him.

"You better let her go, sir" he said "Or I'll be obligued to call the police"

"Fine..." Severus pushed him away "I'm just gonna go my own way..."

He started walking to the door too.

"Sir?"

Severus turned irritated.

"You have to pay for the coffees"

Severus clenched his teeth. He took out his wallet. And tossed a bill to the floor.

"That shit tasted like piss anyway..."

And Severus walked through the door. Lily was no where to be seen.

"FUCK!"

The King surely knew how to move his pieces. He was intelligent and knew how to make The Prince lose his temper. The Prince had one Achilles' talon: Lady Flower. And The King had her. And he was going to use her against him.

A child. A child. A freaking child.

The Prince's game had to give a turn. He needed another plan to destroy the King. And this time, The Prince would not have mercy.

The King was going to pay. And his stupid courtship. And Lady Flower was going to realize her mistake.

They would see.

#marauders era #muggle au #marauders muggle au #anti severus snape #lily evans #james potter #the rightful prince #jily

[nescaveckwriter]

Paintbrushes & Romance - Part 19

"Look what you did," Dean hissed.

Benny smirks," not what I did Dean, its what you said." Dean glares at him, like he is thinking about killing him.

"Like I am going to take advice from you, what you've known her a few months! I've known her for years."

"No Dean, I've known her for a year and a half to be precise, I was there when she Overdosed, when she went through withdrawal, when she barely spoke, or ate, I was there!, not you," his voice getting angrier with every word.

Shock on Dean's face," what do you mean she overdosed? She never told me that, she just said she had a problem with pain meds."

"I'm not surprised", he said low, "when she was going through the withdrawal she, would call your name over and over, then when she got better, she'd sketch and paint, an image of you over and over. She truly adored you, so to answer your previous question, yes I knew who the hell you were, when you showed up at the diner with Jodie, to do the drug bust."

Dean's nostrils flare," and why didn't you say anything, or better yet, why did you take the bullet that was meant for me.?"

"Don't you get it Dean?, I took the damn bullet for you, so that she wont loose you, it will shatter her very being. That beautiful woman, loves you, she chose you, she didn't choose me, I wish she did, but she didn't. I knew from the start, her heart belonged to you, I just had the pleasure of caring about her for a while, and yes, I did love her, hell! I still love her, but I know she'll always choose you, why I don't know because you are a selfish jerk, you know that."

Dean flinches at his words, not because he was angry, but merely because, he realized Benny was right. He didn't deserve her, and he'll be damned if he ever forgot that, and to be honest he didn't get angry at what they had, hell he's done worse, but knowing Benny is so different from who he is, Benny isn't so angry at world, like he can be sometimes, and in his heart he knows that Benny is a good man, hell just by standing here, taking the punch and not throwing one back he's proven he is the better man.

Benny's deep voice brings him out of the trans he was just in.'' Look man, if you need to punch me again, I'll stand here, I will take it, and I won't fight back, but you have to promise me one thing!''

Dean's face puzzled when he asked,'' what is that?''

''Promise me, you'll take care of her, protect her, but never control her, because if I ever find out you took your anger out on her, there will be no place for you to run or hide, I will find you, and I promise I will kill you'', his eyes grey, and his voice deep and low.

Dean, smirks a little,'' first of all, I will never hurt her and secondly I should beat the crap out of you for threating me right now, but I won't, because I can see you care about her deeply, even though it bothers me, that she has loved anyone else other than me, I'm glad she has you, and I know that, if anything ever happens to me, you will be there to help her through it.''

Not expecting the sudden change of heart, he only utters, ''deal.''

___________________

She drove back into town, wanting to get away from the fighting, arguing and what the hell ever was about to happen. It was probably so idiotic of her to leave the two men, back home, but they need to sort this shit out, and she's not going to be in the middle of all of this. ''I'm too freaking exhausted for this'', she whispers.

Finding a parking spot, she shuts down the chevy's engine, texting Eileen if she is also at the Doctor's office. She's been not feeling herself for a few weeks, and decided to visit Dr Stone on Monday, and he called this morning, saying she should pay him a visit, she told her best friend and well she insisted to be here, and frankly she was happy she offered, Eileen waved her down from a few parking's over, fast walking towards her, Eileen looked at her, concern on her face, ''what's wrong honey she signed''.

Telling her everything that just went down, Eileen insisted she will let Sam take a look if the two men is still alive.'' Dammit Eileen, how is that Dean doesn't know that I would choose him a million times over. Yes stuff did happen between me and Benny, I still deeply care about him, But I love Dean, why I don't even know, if he acts like this he makes me so furious''.

Eileen gives her assuring smile,'' we'll figure it out, okay, but first let's go in, and see what is so important that he had to tell you in person,'' holding your shaking hand.

Biting your bottom lip, you just nod and walks in, thinking that everything was going so well, you were happy and know? what disaster is about to threaten your lives now.

''Hello, please take a seat, I've called you in here today, so that we can discuss your test results'', saying with a small smile.

''Give it to me doctor Stone''. you heard him saying ''after all the tests they've done, one test came back positive'', but by then your heart sank, thinking the worst. Not really catching what he said. Looking over at Eileen, signing to you,'' its going to be okay'', you only heard Doctor Stone, saying ''my assistant will book a follow up appointment''.

Trembling, Eileen helps you up, helping you out of the Doctor's office, sitting you down in the closest chair she can find, cupping your face, so she can get your attention,'' its going to be okay''. Helping you breathe, letting you know what the doctor, really said, you look at her wide eyed, signing to her, ''if she is sure'', Eileen just nods.

Getting up on your feet, walking in by doctor Stone confirming what Eileen just told you, you walk out, feeling a bit better. Hugging your best friend, thanking her for the support. Eileen asked you if you wanted to grab a drink, sit down and chat, but you just said ''rain check''.

After this emotional day you had, you are bone tired, the only thing you want to do, is curl up in bed and sleep. Even if it means if you had to chase Dean and Benny out of the house. Pulling into the driveway, you spot Sam's pick-up truck.

Filling your lungs with some extra air you breathed in, chewing on your bottom lip, not sure what to expect, you open the door. The sight of the three men sitting laughing, each with a beer in hand, makes you burst out in tears.

Dean's the first one to see you standing there,'' hello sweetheart'', he walks closer, slightly adjusting you so that the two of you stand on the porch, placing his hand on your cheek, thumbing away your tears, is gruff voice low,'' I've been a jerk, I am so sorry for saying your mine, like your an object, your not, thank you for choosing me, I've come to realize that it was my own insecurities that came to surface, when lashing out towards Benny. I'm not really angry at you''.

Tears still spilling over the edges of her beautiful eyes, her voice brittle,'' really?''

The soft kiss Dean places on her lips, reassures her.

Looking up into his much calmer emerald eyes, ''Dean there's something you need to know'', her voice shaky.

Dean looks concerned, ''out with it sweetheart'', holding her hands in his.

''The last few days, I haven't been feeling myself, so I made an appointment on Monday to see Doctor Stone, and he called me back today, and that's where I was. I got the results of the tests his done''.

A smile tugging at her lips, her voice sweet like honey, ''Dean Winchester, how do you feel about changing your name too Daddy?''

''What? Do you mean,'' his voice heavy.

''Yes babe, we are going to be parents'', her smile spreading across her face.

''I'm going to be a father?'' his eyes showing the emotion. He picks her up, swirling her around, then placing her down gently. Her laughter fills his ears,'' I'm going to be a dad, sweetheart!'' he exclaimed. This is the best news ever. He kisses her, holding her tightly to his chest, he has always dreamed of this day, settling down with the woman he loves and wants to grow old with, kids running around playing, working on there last nerve. How is it that this amazing, angel has giving him, more than he could ever deserve.?

#spotify #dean winchester fanfiction #dean winchester x reader #jared padalecki #jensen ackles x reader #sam and dean #benny lafitte #castiel spn #dean winchester imagine #eileen leahy] #bugsies #d_nesca #d nesca

[sortasirius]

What's genuinely fucking me over is the fact that up until 15x18, even if you don't count the fillers, the season was shaping up in such an awesome way. Like the sexy meta narrative meta-ness, the fleshed out character arcs, the entire things really. Like it looked like a pretty well written cohesive story arc. They really managed to covey the gravity of the big bad and whatnot, and I for one was really excited after 15x18.

Then it's like they forgot where they were going with things, pulled 19 and 20 out of their old unused drafts, and decided to go through with THAT.

Like literally all the lead arcs suddenly became twisted awful, with Jack never getting closure from the 'he's just a tool' from Dean, to Dean hinting that he'd wanted to say something in purgatory, (like you said) his anger issues, Sam's relationship with Eileen, Cas' (again) just-a-tool complex and his lack of self worth and his unanswered confession.

Like the issues all of them were working through were just thrown out of the window for some bullshit nostalgia ending that failed at the nostalgia too.

After 15 fuckin years of the horrendous shit they've gone through, they've literally ended back at the start- Sam, white picket fence, no hunting vs Dean, dying on a hunt, no friend or lover, unsolved self hatred problems etc.

No wonder Jensen had trouble with the ending. It's a complete disservice to the characters and the journey they've taken.

Also like they did Alex and Misha (especially, poor dude) so dirty. Their characters did end up being just tools to the brothers, when it's clear they weren't. Bullshit.

(Sorry about this rant, but I have no SPN watching friends, and I need to let this shit out lmao)

What did you think?

Even 19 made sense in the overall meta-narrative, I was so excited last week when I saw it, because it was PERFECT.  They had defeated the big bad, all that was left was Dean and Cas and Sam and Eileen.  And...nothing?

I truly don’t think that what Jensen had a problem with was *this* ending.  I think Jensen likely had an issue with something else, maybe something we never got to see.

It’s like I keep saying...this ain’t it.  This isn’t the ending we were supposed to get, it just makes no sense at all.

I don’t know what Jensen had a problem with, I don’t know that we’ll ever know, just because...that wasn’t the story, that may have been the original plot, but they simply just ignored all of the emotional beats and narratives.  And that is not on the storytellers.

#isthismyotpwhyyesitis #spn #spoilers #spn finale trash fire

[ashen-sky]

Does anyone else get really anxious over something they have no control over? I'm specifically talking about the reaction to the Supernatural finale.

Tldr; Everyone's reaction to the finale is making me feel guilty and anxious for liking it, mostly cause people are being dicks.

(Warning I'm a bit blunt, and a bit of a dick here)I'm gonna do my usual point form, this is just based on what I've seen and I wanna try seeing if getting off my chest makes me feel better.

1. Reviews-So, I watched the finale the Friday after it aired, and if you read my review you'll know I enjoyed it. I mean, sure it felt a little rushed, and let's not talk about old man Sam's wig but I overall liked it. So, I went looking for fanart, other people's views, and possible fanfiction. You know, like the civil people we all are. Imagine my surprise when 90% of EVERYTHING I saw was "it was shit", "deactivate your account", "fire the writer". This is where my anxiety started, and it's been making me feel sick. So this is an attempt to clear my head and stop ranting to my parents.

2. Cast opinion- Now going into it, I was under the impression all the cast and crew were on bored with it but I recently saw that Ackles was "uneasy" about it. And to me that's sad, he spent 15 years on it. Alot of people have been using this interview to back their hate of the episode, but he didn't say what he didn't like about it. From what I've seen of their relationship with the writers, if it was a huge thing, I'm sure there would've been a compromise. I've also seen people saying Misha didn't like it, but I don't see that. At the very least he was able to enjoy the acting, but I don't think he would've watched it with his kids if he didn't like it.

3. Ackles's interview-In line with the Ackles thing, I've seen people say Kripke Gaslit him, and they MADE him do the ending. But from what I remember when I read the interview, alot of what he said was paraphrased. So it may not have gone down exactly like that. He also says he's still proud of it (I think I read that right). I'll link the original interview in this post.

4.Be nice-And if he really didn't like it, okay. If he really hates it, okay. But that is no excuse for everyone else to act like whiny children. Explain why you didn't like it, phrase it politely. So what If Destiel didn't go canon, or Sam's wife wasn't confirmed to be Eileen, maybe your favorite character wasn't there. But this jas always been about the love of the brothers, not their relationships, and they made this in the middle of a damn quarantine.

5.Your opinion-You're welcome to feel however you want about the episode, and I know the anxiety it's causing me is my own problem. I'm not... can't say that cause it's not entirely true. I'm not saying people's opinions, and people's dislike, are causing me anxiety, it's how they're showing it. You can't look up Supernatural without being bombarded by hate, much less open a comment section. I've been going through and leaving positive comments on some supernatural cw posts.

6. Almost forgot- If you really didn't like the ending, stop whining and write your own. That's something Supernatural has always been open to. Dean literally says, in fan fiction, "I have my version, you have yours." When Maeve asks if it's good even though it doesn't match how he sees it.

Anyways, like I said, this was more for me.

So, let's try being a little positive. Reblog or comment with something you liked OR a polite negative review with what made you dislike it. Dick's will not be tolerated, don't be the reason I have to figure out how to delete comments.

Note: It's not the first time I've been anxious over something I can't control, it happens quite a bit when there's a mass negative reaction to something I liked. But this is the worst it's ever been, it's never made me feel nauseous before. Although the nausea could also be cause I haven't been eating or sleeping right...

#supernatural #supernatural finale #supernatural 15x20 #anime devil's thoughts

[triclitch]

🤣🤣

I just can't lol.

So yo guys. You wanna just umm pretend season 15 didn't happen.

Like it feels like a bunch of fanfic tropes all collage-d into one season like umm...

1. The whole filler episodes just. Wtf. Like I get it. The writers wanna make us feeel for the characters more so the ending will be more gut wrenching. But . Write it into the plot y'know? Don't waste my time Kay.

2. The Destiel confession, like applause for Misha's consistency of acting cause it didn't really come outta no where. But Dean's reaction?

And cas' death was just so wjfjwjwkf. Like I remeber this badass angle.fro. season 4 amd now he just dies like this. Like I get it. He's been on earth for so long and he's died multiple times and his grace has been taken multiple times but damn.. I want season 4 cas back so badly like they made him weaker throughout the show and just opf what an unsatisfying death for him.

3. Hahaha don't even get me started on Midam.

Like. Adam just dies off screen!!! Un how ? Explain! And like Chuck just somehow Bill cipher his ass?? So a vessel can be split from their archangels. And you're telling me Michael just didn't know about that and didn't like take precautions or did it himself safely!! So that he could snap Adam away to a safe place cause he cares about Adam, we saw that in ep. 8 sooo ummm...

4. Also the fact that Michael really said aww shit lost Adam the only thing I care about, welp let me join the person who killed him!!!!!!

Like nahh fam. If you wanna give Michael an evil arch have him go ballistic, have him try to kill EVERYONE Chuck included.

Or.

And this is crazy have him actually grieve like he would . Like why show Midam being friends then just have Michael as soon as he loses Adam just join the person who killed him?

5. Luci. Baby. What have they done. Brought my man back just to kill him. And so damn easily too. Like this biss didn't make us have half a season just trying to defeat him only to be killed just like that.

And him joining Chuck. I know we're trying to sell the whole daddy issue trope but umm I swear he would've still helped the Winchesters cause like he wants to stick it to the man y'know.

6. And Jack. Oooo Jackie boi. I know you're like the new Chuck but are you so conceited that you don't think to bring back you're father (cas) like again writers why show any father son shit between cas and Jack if he was just gonna forget about cas?

7. Also back to the fillers why show any bonding between team free will in past seasons and episodes. And just say f cas when the family fluff episodes came around like what!!!!!

8. Also the kill all gays shit. Like I couldn't care less for spn romance, but like why? Why kill Cas like lol sure be homophobic if you must but try to keep it in your closet....damn man killing my boi and for what.

9. Charlie. Whyd she have to die.

10. And sam umm you don't try to find your girlfriend like tf!??? Poor Eileen

11. Oh and is Billy dead dead cuz Luci killed her and if so why isn't every dead person running out? Cause like Chucks dead and Luci is dead so shouldn't souls be like trapezing outta their respective places cause I promise you Jack ain't gonna be a good gate keeper. Also...

12.Amara. Girl are you just floating around im so confused. Like... lol

In conclusion this whole season is a mess. Like someone please explain to me this entire mess...

And fanfic writers on AO3 please fix this whole season. Like geez ...

#can fanfic writers just rewrite everything cause they are by far more consisrant then spn #like im done with this shit #i didnt even watch season 15 but i know its trash #spn #supernatural #sam winchester #dean winchester #adam milligan #midam #Michael spn #jack kline #chuck #amara #lgbtq #otp #fight me #but like dont #can I spell...no. do I care. haha no #castiel #destiel #but like not really #screw this #fanfic #fix it fics #rant #ao3 #spn spoilers #spn lucifer #they dont deserve this shit #i dont deserve this shit

[caranfindel]

Recap/review 15.18: “Despair”

THEN: The key to Billie's library. Billie wants to become God. Cas made a deal with The Empty. Chuck absorbed Amara. Jack absorbed Adam's rib. Dean pointed a gun at Sam (DEAN POINTED A GUN AT SAM.) Chuck is pissed. Jack is going to explode.

NOW: We begin right where we left off last week, with Jack about to explode with God-killing power. Sam half-carries him into the map table room, Cas tells him to take deep breaths and focus, and Dean gets all panicky and is no help at all. Jack wants the guys to just leave him outside in order to minimize the damage when he goes kaboom. {Sidebar... how far away would he have to be, considering that his explosive power could kill God? Discuss.} Dean yells at Sam to find one of Rowena's spells (and oh, Sam as Rowena's apprentice; there's a plot that was sadly wasted, wasn't it?) but he's interrupted by Billie and her scythe, which she's carrying in a very obvious way. She's furious, and tells them the plan to destroy Chuck was doomed "because of you." Billie can't stop Jack's earth-shattering kaboom, "but there is something I can do." She sends him to the Empty. Empty!Meg cheerfully points out that he doesn't look so hot, but then he looks explosively hot. Ah, there's our earth-shattering kaboom!

Bunker. Billie explains that The Empty was the only option to absorb the impact of Jack the Bomb. And that he's not necessarily dead, because taking out Chuck and Amara was the part that was fatal, not actually being the bomb. Hmm. So Jack's point of no return wasn't actually a point of no return after all. It's kinda retconny, but not really? I've decided it's logical and I approve.

However, if the Empty survives, "it's gonna be pissed." Particularly at Billie. And it's very strong. Billie and Sam remind us that the Empty can only come to Earth if it's summoned. They do not get into the details of what constitutes a summoning, but I'm sure that isn't important. And Billie might be willing to bring Jack back, assuming he survived, but not until Sam returns what he took from her. Chuck's death book.

Sam immediately goes on the attack. He points out that she was planning to betray them from the start, leading to the deaths of all the AU refugees and everyone who was brought back from death, including him and Dean. "Even if I give you the book," he says, "what's to stop you from stabbing us in the back? Killing us all?"

"Nothing," Billie says. She gets up in Sam's face and tells him Jack won't last long. Either give her the book now, or lose him forever. (Can I just point out that Sam is still a little bloody from Dean punching him in the face? After he pointed a gun at him?)

Meanwhile, in the Empty, we discover that Jack is still alive (yay) and that this episode was directed by Richard Speight (yay). He is surrounded by particles that gradually form back into Empty!Meg. And, as predicted, she's pissed.

In the bunker, Sam brings the book to Billie, but ignores her outstretched hand and slams it onto the table instead. It's a pointless little burst of defiance and I love it.

Billie flips to the end to read the new ending of God's book, "since you ruined the last one." She seems to like what she reads. Sam says "Wait, the ends of your books change? So me killing Rowena was presented as unavoidable fate but it really wasn't necessary at all?" No, he actually doesn't. But I do, on his behalf. It's a pointless little burst of defiance. Over in the Empty, Empty!Meg grabs Jack's head and says "you made it loud!" and this is a conversation I've had with my dogs in the wee dark hours of the morning more times than I can count because we just want to SLEEP, GUYS but before she can actually crush his head, Billie zaps him back to the bunker.

Billie tells the guys that Jack is hers because he's still useful. Dean responds by grabbing her scythe and swinging at her. She flings him away, but she's wounded and bleeding light. Oh, and she dropped the book. Sam and Cas ignore Dean crumpled over against the wall - Cas runs to comfort Jack, and Sam runs to pick up the book. Unfortunately, he can't open it. Dean says "hey, thanks for not helping me, guys" and Sam says "oh, I'm sorry, I guess I'm still a little rattled from you punching me in the face after you pointed a gun at me." No, he doesn't. But I do, on his behalf.

Several people have pointed out how skinny Jared looks in these last few episodes, but this is the first time I've noticed it. It will be interesting to see how he looks in the two that were filmed after their Covid shutdown.

Time jump. Dean is sitting in the library, drinking whiskey. And I've said it a million times but I'll say it again - I could watch an entire episode that was just Dean drinking. And then it gets even better when Sam walks in wearing only a v-neck t-shirt. Single layer Sam alert, guys! How long has it been? Dean slides the bottle over to him and we get a little bonus hand porn and then this happens:

Sam, I'm sorry about... everything.

Dean, you don't have to -

I pulled a gun on you. It's like I just couldn't stop. You know, we were so close to beating him. Like, I could smell Chuck's blood in the water, and I - nothing else mattered. It was everything. And I just couldn't snap out of it.

Well, you did. You've snapped me out of worse.

Hmmm. Am I missing a time when Dean snapped Sam out of something? I mean, I know in Stull, Sam was able to overcome Lucifer because of Dean. But that was Sam snapping himself out of it. And Dean convinced Sam to give up the trials, but that wasn't Sam under anything that he needed to be "snapped out of." I think if you're going to give Dean credit for snapping himself out of it when confronted by his teary eyed, bloodied little brother, you have to give Sam credit for snapping himself out of his own situations.

It doesn't matter. All that matters is these two sitting quietly in the dark, drinking whiskey together.

Dean's feeling some despair (nice) because Billie wants them dead, Jack is powerless (oh, wait, when did that happen?), and Michael isn't answering his prayers. No one is on their side. "Well, we regroup, somehow," says Sam. They drink a sad little toast to "somehow," and I die a thousand deaths.

Billie's library. Billie stalks angrily through the stacks. A reaper informs her he put up warding to keep the Empty out, and asks if the plan has changed. Yes, it has.

Elsewhere, a woman we don't know is cooking some seriously dry scrambled eggs. She thinks she knows what she's doing, because she's explaining to someone else in the room how to cook eggs so they're "not too runny, not too dry" but seriously. Gordon Ramsay would be appalled. {Sidebar: Gordon's eggs actually look a bit too runny for my taste, and my family would refuse to eat them, but this lady's dry crumbly eggs are still an abomination.} She turns around and we see AU Charlie sitting at the kitchen table. Oh, Charlie has a girlfriend! Sweet. And she must be in love, because she tells this girlfriend that they're the best eggs she's ever had. And also, she's still hunting. Guess she didn't retire to a mountaintop after all. Probably because she couldn't get wifi. Anyway. Her girlfriend's plate crashes to the floor because her girlfriend abruptly disappeared. (Aw, her name was Stevie. Stevie and Charlie. How cute is that?)

Time jump. Charlie's apartment building is called Kim Manor. Nice.

As Sam runs the EMF meter (and there's a nice wordless conversation where Sam lets Dean know he didn't find anything), Charlie talks about how they met (thanks to AU Bobby) and how she experienced nothing when Stevie disappeared. No sulphur smell, no cold, nothing. Dean and Sam have another wordless conversation about what they think happened.

Dean and Sam explain that Billie wants to send all the AU people back to their now non-existent worlds. So Stevie was from AU World too? I guess that explains how AU Bobby knew her. Coincidentally, Sam's phone rings, and it's AU Bobby. They have an extremely short conversation in which Sam learns that another AU hunter simply vanished. And there's no explanation on Sam's end, just "yeah, I understand." So have they already talked to AU Bobby about the Billie situation? Or was Sam and Bobby's conversation literally "hey, a hunter vanished into thin air, how weird is that" and "yeah, I understand" with no further discussion? Anyway. Dean says it's open season on anyone from another world (aw, sorry, Winchesters in Brazil), anyone who came back from the dead, and Sam gets a horrified look on his face and says "Eileen." Oh shit!

Meanwhile, out by the Impala, in broad daylight, Jack tells Cas that he feels strange because the plan failed and his destiny was averted. "I was ready to die, and I wanted to - for Sam, for Dean, for the world - I wanted to make things right. And now I don't know why I'm even here." OF COURSE HE LISTED SAM FIRST. Cas tells him he didn't need absolution from anyone, and that they care about him not because of his usefulness, but just because he's him. Somewhere Dean says "um, wait." Jack is scared because he's powerless and can't protect anyone. Cas is too. So, did Jack lose his powers after the earth shattering kaboom? Or earlier, and I just wasn't paying attention?

Nighttime. Dean speeds down the road as Sam texts Eileen. I don't know where Eileen is, but she must be pretty far away from Kim Manor. Sam told her to get out of her house, go somewhere public, and wait by her car. Now, I cover the guest star credits, so I don't know if Shoshanna is in this episode. But even unspoiled, I'm pretty sure she's not going to be there when they arrive. She starts to type a response, as evidenced by the bubbles, but then stops responding. Yep, just as I thought, no one is standing by her car. Sam finds her phone on the ground, cracked as if it were dropped (like, say, by someone who disappeared while holding it) and LOOK AT HER LOCKSCREEN. LOOK AT IT.

Some will say this is just the photo that pops up when Sam texts her but they are WRONG. This is her FREAKING LOCK SCREEN, PEOPLE.

Anyway. He sees the unfinished message she was writing, which says she's by her car. Aw, Sam. Dean tries to talk to him and he says "I can't - if I let myself go there, I'll lose my mind, I can't right now."

Aw, SAM!

Sam compartmentalizes his grief and jumps into take-care-of-everyone mode. He says they need to gather everyone together, and they need to find a location central to everyone. Well, I mean, there is one place I know of that is literally the central most point in the United States, maybe you could go there? It's supposed to be secure from all things supernatural, too. Dean says that while Sam is going that, he is going to go end what he started. OH, GOOD. I WAS HOPING THEY WOULD SPLIT UP. "We couldn't make Chuck pay, but Billie? She left her blade. Her I can kill." Hey, wouldn't be the first time. Sam agrees, Cas says he'll go with Dean, and we get a brother hug. Once again, Dean does the two things I love when he hugs Sam: 1. he puts his arms on top, as if he were still the taller brother, and b. he looks away and packs up his emotions before he lets Sam see his face after the hug. "Let's go, Cas," he says. "Let's go reap a reaper." Cas turns and follows without saying anything at all to Sam or Jack, but I'm sure that won't be an issue.

Time jump - it's daytime. Sam's on the phone with Donna, who is standing outside her truck (but didn't she used to have a big black SUV?) at that bridge we've seen so many times. She's sending him to "the old Harmon property," which should be just what he's looking for because it has an abandoned silo. I mean, I wouldn't jump immediately to abandoned silo, but maybe there weren't any abandoned warehouses around. She says it's in Hastings, just south of her, and if you think I didn't confirm that the town of Hastings is in fact about 30 minutes south of Stillwater, Minnesota then you just don't know me at all.

Sam is at a gas station and oh, he's driving Eileen's car! That's not heartbreaking at all. I guess she didn't have her keys in her pocket when she disappeared. (Hah, like Sam Winchester needs keys.) Donna and AU Bobby are rounding up everyone they can think of. She asks what the plan is, and Sam bends down creepily to look at Jack in the passenger seat and says "I'm still working on that." I mean, I know they keep telling us Jack lost his powers, but the way Sam looks at him right here certainly suggests Jack is part of the plan, and maybe not in a good way. (Spoiler alert: seriously, why do I even bother.)

Sam comes around to Jack's window and tells him he needs him to drive, because Sam needs to work on archives and spells and stuff. And is that true, or is this just "I don't expect you to live through this part so I want to let you have some time behind the wheel of Eileen's 1970 Plymouth Valiant?" (At least that's what The Husband thinks it is.)

Bunker. Enter Dean and Cas. Dean declares that if Billie isn't in her library, they'll just trash the place to "smoke her out." It's an interesting choice of words.

Foreshadowing Dean as the new Death? (Remember, I'm completely unspoiled. I know nothing.)

Silo. Let's stick to this location for now. Sam and Jack pull up and are greeted by Donna. Jack goes inside to set up the warding, and Donna gives Sam a nice hug.

I want to be there.

She tells him she's sorry about Eileen and gets one of his sad little nods that I love so much. Bobby is already here, and she name-drops Garth and Jody and the girls, saying they're on "high alert." Sam tells her they're not on Billie's list, so they should be safe. And so should Donna. Well, that's good to know. Sam's surprised to see Charlie pull up. She tells him "I just don't want this to happen to anyone else." I don't know what you think you're going to be able to do, Charlie, but okay.

Turns out the silo is actually a Tardis, so I guess maybe it was a good choice. It's huge on the inside, and is also more finished than any silo I've ever been in (which is, okay, one silo, but still.) The interior is already heavily warded. Several people are milling about. {Sidebar: How many hunters were away from the bunker when Michael attacked, and why have none of them returned?} Bobby tells Sam that as soon as the hunters heard he wanted them there, they came running. "Whether you like it or not, you're the big man here." Hey, I wonder if the guy who called him Chief is here. Bobby, being a man after my own heart, is mostly concerned about the bathroom situation. Sam hopes they won't be there long enough for it to be an issue. He has a spell from Rowena (!) that should boost the strength of the wards, but that's all he has. Bobby doesn't look very reassured, and glances in a foreshadowy way at a family with kids. Sam looks around at all of these people he feels responsible for and takes a deep breath and oh, my heart.

Donna and Jack are painting more wards. Jack bends down to look at a plant, and Donna comes up to him and says "I'm no expert on this hoodoo stuff, but best we patch that up, yeah?" and I don't know what the hell she's talking about. What is this plant disturbing? Jack reaches out to touch the plant and it withers away as his hand gets close. Friends, I'm pretty sure this is a bad sign. Jack is too. He stares at his hand, and if he'd been watching a few seasons ago, he would have noticed that plants did the same thing when Amara touched them. Coincidence???

Later we see everyone watch as Sam recites the spell. (Yes, it's hot. Do you even have to ask?) The sigils glow red briefly and then fade, and the music turns ominous and I think this means his boost failed. But I guess not, because Sam says now they wait. But they don't have to wait long, because suddenly one of the children dissolves into smoke. One by one, all of the AU people dissolve like they've been snapped by Thanos. Charlie runs up to Sam and says "Sam, what do we do" just like Maggie did, and just like Maggie she's taken out immediately. Sam watches in horror as AU Bobby smokes out. He turns to Donna, who says "Mr. Stark, I don't feel so good," and then Donna is gone! Crap! Jack and Sam are left staring at the empty-except-for-them silo.

One more serving of despair, coming right up.

On to the other side.

Dean enters Billie's library, brandishing the scythe. Cas follows, bearing only a hangdog expression. Dean motions for him to go one direction and Dean goes the other, soon finding Billie. He thinks he's sneaking up behind her, but she says "So, I guess this is the part where I say hello boys. Hello, boys." Oh, I was wrong; Cas has his angel blade. Billie snarks about Dean's bad aim, and he says he wasn't trying to kill her then (which seems like a lie), but he is now, because of what she's doing to his people. Billie slams him against the wall again. She chokes Cas Darth Vader-style from a distance, and then the old fashioned way. "Remember when you stabbed me in the back?" she says. "Because I do." Oh, that's funny, because earlier Sam said she was going to stab them in the back. She should have said "like you stabbed me?"

Dean comes to the rescue by poking her with the blunt end of the scythe rather than the pointy end, so maybe she was right about his bad aim. Then he gets the blade against her throat (but still not the sharp end, just the back) and demands that she stop killing his friends. She says she didn't - it was Chuck. And Dean's wasting time.

I'm considering it time well spent, because it looks so nice.

Billie tells Dean the injury he gave her earlier is something she can't recover from - she's going to die. She pulls away her coat to show him a nasty festering wound, and I wonder why something so physical would kill her, but. Eh. She tells him she doesn't care about his friends or family. "But seeing you here has reminded me of something. There is one thing I'd like. One wish before I go. I'd like to see you dead." She grabs her scythe back, flings the boys around, and slowly stalks toward them. Dean and Cas rush through the door back into the bunker.

Dean is panicky again, trying to figure out what to do next. He's suddenly struck down by chest pain, and I expect to see someone sticking a knife (or a scythe) in his back, but it's actually Billie doing it Darth Vader-style again. Cas drags him away as Billie monologues. "It's you, Dean; it's always been you. Death-defying. Rule-breaking. You are everything I lived to set right. To put down. To tame. You are human disorder incarnate." Yeah, we know, Dean's awesome. We get this speech every season.

Cas and Dean end up in the dungeon storeroom. Cas gets Dean's knife out of his pocket and cuts his own hand to paint a sigil on the door. It looks like an angel banishing sigil, but apparently it block's Billie's power. Not permanently, though, because it fades as she pounds on the door. Cas says that since the wound is killing her, they just have to wait her out.

Yeah, and if we can't?

Then we fight.

We'll lose. I just led us into another trap. All because I couldn't hurt Chuck. Because I was angry, and because I just needed something to kill, and because that's all I know how to do.

Dean.

It was Chuck all along. We never should have left Sam and Jack. We should be there with them now.

Yes you should, Dean, you really really should. Dean is practically drowning in despair, which, you know. Is a good thing. 10/10 would recommend. "She's gonna get through that door," he tells Cas. "And she's gonna kill you, and then she's gonna kill me. I'm sorry."

"Wait, there is one thing she's afraid of," Cas says. "There's one thing strong enough to stop her." He tells Dean about the deal he made to save Jack in the Empty.

Friends, I'm going to do you a favor. If you haven't seen the episode, and aren't planning to watch the episode, I want you to read this paragraph and then skip down until you see the pretty picture of Dean. And start reading after that picture. Trust me. So, Cas summons the Empty just as Billie breaks down the door. The Empty kills Billie, but she also takes Cas. Dean is saved but Cas is gone.

{Sigh. Can I skip this part? No, I owe it to you.}

Cas explains that the Empty was going to come snatch him away as soon as he experienced a moment of true happiness. But happiness isn't having, happiness is knowing. And Dean is wonderful and "Everything you have ever done, the good and the bad, you have done for love." You just threatened to shoot your little brother for love, for example. Cas is teary eyed and Dean looks confused as hell and I pause the TV and turn to The Husband and we have this conversation:

I don't think I can watch this.

Why, because it's so sappy?

No, because I think they're going to kiss.

What? Why would they kiss? Is there something I'm missing?

Because part of the fandom WANTS them to kiss, and there's this group of fans that are super obnoxious about it, and they harass the actors and the writers and I think now the show thinks EVERYBODY wants them to kiss. Even though the guy who plays Dean* says it would never happen. Because I know he wasn't happy about the way the show ended, and I'm afraid this is why he wasn't happy.

...

I don't think they're gonna kiss.

If they do, I'm done.

*The Husband is not on a first name basis with Jensen.

So, let me point out that The Husband, who watches this show the way a normal human being watches a show (i.e., doesn't interact with the fandom at all), had absolutely NO expectation that they would kiss. Anyway, with some trepidation, I push play again. And Cas is still going. Dean is the most caring, selfless, loving human being on earth (OH GOD MAKE IT STOP) and knowing him has changed Cas.

Why does this sound like a goodbye?

Because it is. I love you.

Don't do this, Cas.

We see a black blob materialize behind Dean, because even though the Empty can only come to Earth if it's summoned, there it is. And I could argue about whether Cas being happy actually summoned the damn thing but I've already lost the will to live, so instead I'm going to describe to you how I watched in horror, with my finger hovering over the pause button, as Cas reached out to Dean and put his hand on his shoulder. But he just pushed him out of the way. Thank you baby Jesus. Billie breaks the door down as the Empty slurps into the dungeon. It surrounds Cas and Billie and sucks them into its depths. Dean is left alone. Oh, and he has a bloody palm print on his jacket from Cas grabbing his shoulder. I guess someone did watch a little bit of older seasons after all. Hard to tell sometimes.

I mean, at least he looked good, right?

Back at the silo. I've decided it must be mostly underground and isn't a grain silo like I thought. So what kind of silo do Yankees have that's mostly underground? Anyway. Jack and Sam emerge, having failed catastrophically at their mission. Sam is trying to call Dean, who isn't answering. He looks mildly panicky. "Sam?" Jack says, a little shaky. "Was it just them?"

OH CRAP. I didn't even think of that possibility.

"I don't know," Sam says, also shaky. And as we see an empty gas station and playground, it really looks like it wasn't just them at all. Sam and Jack look at each other, alone and terrified. And back in the bunker's dungeon, Dean's phone rings. It's Sam. He doesn't answer.

Despair!

So. You know how sometimes something really good will happen in an episode? And I'll say, no matter how bad this episode is, this 90 seconds makes it worth it? Well, sometimes the opposite happens. Sometimes you get a two or three minute scene - a horribly written, badly acted scene - and it's so awful that it ruins an episode. A season. A show. I'm angry that the showrunners pandered to a small, noisy minority of fans to throw something into the show that most fans didn't want and didn't help the story at all. I'm annoyed that, once again, Dean is put up on an embarrassingly overwrought pedestal. I'm kind of amused that they did this in the worst way possible. Cas's love was unrequited (unless they screw that up in the next episode), Misha's acting caused so much secondhand embarrassment that I had a hard time watching again, and from what I see on Tumblr, half of the Destihellers are furious because "Dean is a homophobe." Which is bullshit. Not returning someone's romantic affection isn't homophobia. It's consent. (I know... on this show? Ha ha.)

{Sidebar: If "Destiel" means the characters have mutual feelings for each other, doesn't this mean Destiel is not, in fact, canon? I mean, it was already so badly written that one could argue Cas wasn't proclaiming romantic love, but just a life-changing experience thanks to one human. Discuss.}

But I need to stop thinking about it. I can't - if I let myself go there, I'll lose my mind, I can't right now.

And this wasn't even the Buckleming episode, friends. There is probably a Buckleming episode left.

I got so distracted by this nonsense that I almost forgot to talk about the Jack situation. So here's how I feel about that. I love Jack as a character. I love him as someone the Winchesters could lose (Basically, someone to stuff in the fridge? Why not.) But I don't want him to be one of them. I don't want Jack's story to be treated as if it were as important as the Winchester's story. Just like I didn't want Cas to have his own plots. I want it always, always to come down to Sam and Dean.

Anyway, I'm sure I'll have more to say. But for right now, all I'm saying is this: I pledge to stick with this show, to stick with fanworks, no matter how badly they fuck up the landing. But guys, you don't have to try so hard to fuck it up.

Two to go. As always, help me stay unspoiled, including casting info and episode titles.

#spn #15.18 #spoilers #recap #tv recaps