All You Got | Part 8
Part 8: Observant
Plot: Daryl Dixon hadn’t known much beyond anger and loneliness his whole life, until he found family at the end of the world. Everything he grew to care about was ripped away the day the prison fell; so when he recognized you, an enforcer of his loss, hiding in that cabin, he almost pulled the trigger. But after you end up saving his life, he couldn’t find the indifference to leave you for dead, even if you’d been on the Governor’s side. (Mid-Late Season 4)
Series Masterlist | AO3 Version
Paring: Eventual Daryl Dixon x Reader
Word Count: 7.6k (oops)
Warnings: typical twd content. mentions of death. a bit suggestive wink wink.
A/N: hi hi. apologies for the late posting (again). exam season is in full swing and im drowning a bit. butttt, I managed to get this little (its the longest chapter yet lol) part out for you guys <3 just cause I love u so much. ps. the gif is a hint ;)
Every step west of that cottage distanced you further from the cold front following yesterday’s rain. The day hadn’t started exceptionally hot, but the week’s gradual dip in temperature made the sun’s increasing beat feel more eager than you’d known it as of late. The further you got, the more frequent sips you took from the lukewarm water bottle in your bag, even tying that sweater you’d been cuddling for warmth in, just yesterday, around your waist.
Daryl seemed alright, all things considered. His arm hadn’t proved too troublesome, but the area had proved relatively deserted anyway. The two walkers you came across were tired and slow. Not much of a threat. The heat didn’t seem to bother him, either; he hadn’t shed the flannel underneath his vest yet.
The sun was at its highest point in the sky when you met the border of the next town, a few hours later.
“You’ve been through here before?” You asked Daryl, pointing to your spot on the map while walking side by side down the first commercial strip of the town. The stores looked like something out of a movie, quant but full of country charm. If it hadn’t been for the boarded windows and rusted cars sitting in the road, it would’ve been a lively sight.
“When we first cleared the prison. Made our way through all the places nearby, too.”
“Couldn’t have left a little for us?” You teased, glancing up at him.
“There’s still some left. Shit we didn’t need.”
“Shit we might need?”
“Mhm. Lemme see tha’.” He grabbed the map from your hand, raising one of his own to block the sun from his eyes. He glanced over the paper, squinting at the tiny roads, then at the street sign above.
“We can take this to Red Oak.” He tapped the street lines on the map, then continued forward.
“What's on Red Oak?”
He looked over his shoulder with a slight smirk.
“Somethin’ we need.”
It wasn’t until halfway down Red Oak Drive that you realized what that was.
When it clicked, you smiled.
It was an auto repair shop. Daryl had been here before, briefly as he told it, but long enough to make note of a few vehicles still in good condition. One of which was an old, dark blue hatchback that only needed a new battery and some gas to get started again. It was still sitting in the backlot, bathed in the sun’s last harsh rays of the season after the two of you made your way around the building.
Daryl popped the hood. It was in the same condition as it was when he first found it, with a dead battery and dusty windows.
“Do we… recharge it?”
You didn’t know much about cars other than how to drive them.
“Unless ya got a generator I don’t know ‘bout,” Daryl quipped, to which you softly rolled your eyes. “We need a new one.”
“Well, there’s gotta be something here.” You looked back to the building.
“Mhm.” He nodded, closing the hood again. “Come on.”
He kicked the back door three times. You were surprised that hadn’t been enough to bring it down; it was a flimsy thing. They must’ve not worried much about burglars in a small town like this. The brick wall was sturdy, though. Ridged edges pressed into your shoulder as you leaned against it, one leg crossed over the other while the wait began. A breeze of crisp, much more seasonally appropriate air rushed by, fluttering your few loose pieces of hair; you’d have to redo that mess of a ponytail soon.
Daryl readjusted his hold of the crossbow, rolling his shoulders back— as well as he could, the left one was still noticeably stiff.
You weren’t subtle about keeping an eye on him.
“How’s the shoulder?”
His eyes squinted under the bright sun. “Fine.”
You raised an eyebrow in disbelief.
“’S a bit sore,” he admitted.
“I tried to tell you.” The loose smile on your lips was sympathetic, rather than teasing.
“I know.” Daryl chewed at his lip. “But, I know ya get why I couldn’t stay there, neither.”
You stood a bit straighter, and the smile slipped away.
“I do.”
Daryl nodded. The air was heavy, not only with the newfound heat but a lingering tension— knowing— between you. If there was anyone who could understand his urge to find what was left of his family, it was you. The night you told him about your brother was still fresh in memory. There had been a vagueness you kept about the whole thing, a tone that could have sounded like a casual acceptance of fate, but Daryl remembered that look in your eye. The tear that slipped past. He didn’t have any doubt that you’d searched as far as you could for him.
But some people were too far gone.
The shared silence between you two had grown comfortable these last few weeks. This one was different. Stretching seconds, then a minute, it made his muscles heavy. His weight felt unbalanced, even with two feet on the ground.
Daryl had never been good with words— unless you counted those snarky quips he made. He either didn’t think at all or thought too long. It made him snappy and surly, the type of man people would’ve avoided before this thing. Somewhere there was a list of names to prove it. And yet, he had something to say. He wanted to.
“Thank you,” he finally mumbled.
Your expression lifted at that. “For what?”
“For keepin’ an eye on me. Takin’ care’a me the way ya did.”
Still, you seemed confused. A knit of your brows and a sweet look in your eye as you tried to pick apart some deeper meaning. Of course, you helped him. That’s what you promised, back at the start.
“Of course,” you replied. “What else was I gonna do?”
“I didn’t think you were gonna leave or nothin’,” he said, recalling your conversation while patching him up. Loyal ran deep in you, like it did him, and he trusted that you wouldn’t just leave him to rot. “But a lot’a people would’a.”
Maybe that’s what he meant. Thank you for not being that person.
You blinked, readjusting your focus on his serious demeanour. He was reserved, his lips drawn in and eyes barely holding your stare.
“Well, that’s not us,” you said plainly.
A reminder that he’d given you that loyalty, too. You weren’t sure if there were words to express how it didn’t feel so difficult to give your attention and care to the health of the man who fought tooth and nail for you to live, even after all the harm you’d caused him. It wasn’t even that you felt you owed him, but you knew he deserved it.
Daryl gave you a small glimpse of a smile. Soft and sweet, like he was proving to be— deep down, at least. It drew a lopsided grin from you too. Your temple rested against the cool brick wall, and under the sun’s golden glow, you looked quite pretty like that. It was a talent, how quickly you could turn the charm back on; nothing else seemed to grab his attention the same way.
“After all, what are friends for?”
Daryl scoffed. He hoped he didn’t sound ungrateful when he blurted, “Tha’s wha' we are now?”
“I would say so. We keep saving each other’s lives and the conversation is half decent.” You shrugged, as if indifferent. But your smile had turned playful not long ago, about the same time he noticed a warmth at his cheeks.
He’d blame it on the heat, if you asked.
A second or two later, a walker slammed against the door.
Daryl’s shoulder wasn’t too restraining; he lured the lone monster out and freed his knife from its skull without breaking a sweat. You gave him a quick smile of acknowledgment before the two of you stepped inside.
The garage was in rough condition. A sign that was probably falling apart even before the world did, cheap tile floors, and a thick smell of mildew mixed with something decomposing— you were, unfortunately, quite knowledgeable about that smell, by now. The nicest thing about the building was that big roll-down window in the front that let the storefront become soaked in sunlight. The summer must’ve been a lot more tolerable with that wide open.
When the sunlight sneaking into the abandoned building didn’t reach far enough, Daryl held a flashlight in his mouth and scanned the store with his bow. His left shoulder was still stiff, so he had to depend on his other arm to bear most of the weight. Of course, you’d already tried to get him to keep it on his back, if anything, and take the gun instead— but he refused. All but demanded you keep the gun for yourself.
The two of you searched the aisles with quiet steps, waiting for another unfriendly face to jump out of the shadows.
It didn’t come.
Instead, you gathered the few supplies Daryl needed, even pocketed a pair of sunglasses that you were sure would be useless after today, and went back out to that warm autumn day. Sitting on that small bench by the side of the building, eyes protected from the sun, you watched Daryl pop the hood of the car. He was quick at work, dexterous fingers tinkering with different parts of the vehicle that you could barely label.
Between sips of water, your sight caught on those fingers— now smeared with grease— perhaps a second too long. When he turned to wipe his hands along that red rag in his back pocket, he noticed your lingering eye and paused.
Hesitated.
With the pair of you caught off guard, you tried to break the quickly growing tension and asked, “Were you an auto mechanic before?”
Daryl shook his head, bangs falling in his eyes as he did. He stretched underneath the hood again but spared you a glance back. Eyes squinted under the sun, the shine of sunlight hitting the grease along his exposed skin; the scene before you was beginning to look like something out of those ridiculous male model calendars.
“I jus’ know cars,” he rumbled, a slight smirk to match that thick accent.
It was getting absurd, really; the hot sun wasn’t the only thing making you blush.
You swallowed another gulp of water.
It turned out the battery issue wasn’t too complicated. Daryl recounted some of his steps to you, telling you about which wire connected to which point, and so on. It was valuable information, undoubtedly worth paying attention to. The only problem was that by that point, the sun’s beat had stripped him of his vest and hitched the sleeves of his flannel around his elbows. The fact that the top three buttons were undone, opening across that broad and bare chest of his, wasn’t lost on you, either.
It felt like a tease. He did.
All you could do was nod along with his rough drawl and lean against the cool brick wall while you tried to deny checking him out. But really, everything else came second place to the swell of that shirt around his biceps, and his tense, thick forearms. Muscles overworked after dealing with tight gears and heavy equipment.
The shade of those sunglasses was dangerous, giving you the excuse to let your eyes roam free all while Daryl was none the wiser— or so you hoped.
Thoughts you hadn’t entertained in a long time began to roam free, too. It hadn't bothered you when they left; survival was the top priority, not romance or desire. Of course, the lack of time and potential suitors was a factor, too— why would you think about that when there wasn't even a chance for it? But here you were now, staring at Daryl, and recalling that fluttering feeling of attraction in your gut all too well.
He was kind and strong. Whatever brute strength and resilience he had was matched with that three-sizes-too-big heart of his. After all, who else would take in an injured stranger, nevertheless one that attacked you just hours beforehand? Daryl might’ve blamed it on getting even, after you helped him from the window, but you knew there was something more behind that harsh stare of his.
Something delicate.
For whatever reason, you’d been lucky enough to see that gold-hearted nature firsthand. It sliced through his rough exterior, sparkling like a piece of glass caught in the sun. It was fragile, but you’d seemed to weave your way inside, anyway.
You inhaled— stop.
It might've felt otherwise, but there was still parts of Daryl you didn't know. Sometimes you forgot he was a man you’d known less than a month, been friends (barely) with less than two weeks. Even if he proved to be a good person, and was clearly easy on the eyes, from the obvious display ahead, these thoughts were intrusive. Perhaps an outcome of an idle mind. A natural attraction after a string of moments free of tension; all those life-or-death events bonded you, for better or worse, and as the urgency and blood washed off, you were falling victim to the full extent of that tie.
“Got tha’?”
“Mhm,” you faintly hummed.
He said your name— no, repeated it. Embarrassment snapped you back into focus. Here you were daydreaming and practically ogling the man, while he was trying to teach you something. Help you.
“Asked ya to grab another jug.” He gestured to the empty distilled water in his hand. Thank God, you were able to ignore that flex of his arm— mostly— when he did.
“Right, yeah, of course,” you stammered. He tossed you the small flashlight before you scurried back into the building. The dark, cool air was a welcome relief against your hot cheeks, and you hoped it’d bring down whatever flush had inevitably crept up your chest.
At least you had those sunglasses.
Maybe Daryl could feel your eyes roam his bare arms, chest, neck— stop— but you still had an inch of dignity left; he couldn’t prove it past the dark tint of those glasses, now sitting at the top of your head.
Strolling through those same aisles, you grabbed another jug and tried to shake the last of those thoughts from your mind. Like how his eyes were as blue as the pretty Georgian sky, and were quickly becoming a solace for you.
You were starting to like the looks he gave you— like he had while waiting at the door. It wasn’t that he was easy to read, no, you’d probably be fighting for a glimpse into those thoughts of his for the rest of your life. But every time you met those eyes that were once so harsh, you remembered the forgiveness he’d shared with you. The kindness. Perhaps it was a bit selfish because when you thought about that, it made something bloom deep in your chest. Something warm and sweet and good.
You wanted to share it with him too.
Somehow.
Helping him find his people was your first try. You hoped you wouldn’t need a second.
You grabbed the second jug of distilled water and turned to head back.
A thump came from behind.
It was odd. Two years spent in this world and yet, in a week, you’d reverted right back to that jumpy girl at the start. The air became thin, and you had to suck in a deeper breath just to keep your head straight. Heart pounding against your ribcage.
The last time you were in a dark store alone, it ended up with three people dead and Daryl shot.
You spun around, flashlight high. The light danced across the aisles, no walkers or living under the fluorescent glow. That wasn’t enough to soothe your anxieties, so you placed the jug on the ground next to you and grabbed your gun, instead.
It was then that your light landed on an exit sign. You could see the frame of a door below, in the far corner of the store. You approached it carefully, previously neglected as the pair of you assumed it was just a fire exit leading to that back alley, but now, with your heart still beating fast, you suspected something more lying behind that door.
You twisted the handle carefully, gun ready in the other hand, but it was locked.
You checked the front desk, found a ring of keys, and tried two before you found the right one. By then, your heart had slowed a bit. An engaged lock between you and that warning was slightly comforting, but you were still on edge. Finger ready by the trigger, if needed.
The door creaked open and you stepped inside.
Immediately, you found the source of the thump. A lone walker. Long, thin hair that was missing chunks and skin like leather stretched across its loosely hung open jaw. Its eyes were wide, staring out to the door you’d just walked through, but other than that low moan that rasped past its throat, it barely moved.
The walker was old and frail, decomposing in this backroom alone since, if you could guess, the start. It didn’t even try to crawl. It couldn’t, there was a heavy cast on its leg reaching up to its upper thigh. A mop lying on the floor— maybe the thump. A bottle of antifreeze sat next to it, a dried splash of something bumpy and red.
Puke.
She killed herself. Locked alone in a backroom, with a broken leg and no other choice.
The various ways you found the dead often reflected their last moments. Guts hanging out and bits of muscle torn from their flesh meant the obvious. Bullet and knife wounds, too. At the start, the mourning had almost been unbearable. Suffocating. Sympathy never stopped, there were simply too many roaming the world. It became dormant after one too many tried— and almost succeeded— to kill you. Then, something you only ever thought about in silent moments like this one.
You unsheathed your knife and stepped over the fallen mop. It was the least you could do.
The room was untouched. It didn’t have many valuables. Not for this world, anyway. There was a stack of cash and a nice bracelet in the bottom drawer of the desk, but nothing other than a couple of mints and a screwdriver that was worth keeping. In the top drawer, you found a single key on a thick, metal ring.
You pocketed it, just in case.
Other than the desk and those wobbly shelves filled with client records and taxes— a whole lot of paper— there was only that lumpy grey blanket, draped over something leaning against the wall, left to check out. You peeled it off carefully, but a cloud of dust surrounded anyway. Between coughs, you recognized what was underneath. The somber tone of the room lifted quickly, then.
From the front of the store, Daryl called your name. Apparently, you’d been taking too long and his suspicions had arisen.
“I’m okay!” you called back, clearing your throat one last time. “Be there in a second.”
Even though you knew even less about motorcycles than you did about cars, you smiled as you gripped the handles. You were betting Daryl knew about bikes, too. You kicked up the stand and moved the bike through the store. Twisting it around the aisles and picking up that leftover jug of distilled water as you did.
“I found something.” You grinned as you stepped back into the sunlight.
Daryl’s eyes widened when he saw what you were leading.
“No way.” He said, wiping his hands across the red rag, before stuffing it back into his pocket. “Where’d ya find this?”
“Backroom. We missed it earlier.” You pulled out the keys you found as Daryl quickly grabbed the bike.
His hands ran over the handles, then the seat.
“And I think I found the key.”
He had a ridiculous grin plastered across his face. You hadn’t even realized he could smile like that.
“Pass ‘em ‘ere.”
You dropped the ring in his open palm as he straddled the bike, thighs on either side. He looked down at the beast of a vehicle between his legs like it was the prettiest thing he’d ever seen.
And then he looked back at you with that same look, and it almost made those intrusive thoughts from earlier seem a bit less insane.
You were sure you had a goofy grin of your own. “You know how to ride one of these?”
He raised an eyebrow.
“Sorry. Stupid question,” you chuckled, eyes roaming over his leather vest— back on— and patchwork jeans. You never liked stereotypes, but Daryl sure was one sometimes.
“Jus’ a bit,” he quipped.
“You know,” you mumbled, smile growing, “I’ve never been on one.”
“Never?”
“Nope.”
“Well, come on, girl.”
You certainly didn’t need convincing. He shuffled forward, giving you the space to swing your leg over the seat behind him. At first, your hands grabbed at the spot, maneuvering your balance into a comfortable sit— but the overwhelming sight of Daryl's exceptionally broad back, draped in that black leather vest, soon had you squirming again.
“Ya gotta hold on to me, alright?”
“Okay,” you mumbled. You placed your shaky hands on his sturdy shoulders, like handlebars of your own. It was lucky that he was wearing that vest now—an extra layer between your skin and his— because you were pretty sure your palms were slick with sweat by that point.
“Not there.” Daryl’s hand wrapped around the bend of your elbow, gently pulling your hands down. “Don’t need ya diggin’ a finger in my scab.”
Then he repositioned them around his waist.
Like it had been nothing.
It had— you reminded yourself. Whatever bothered thoughts that kept slipping into mind today were an exception. Maybe your period was coming back. Or maybe that hot sun had melted away every bit of self-control you had left.
“Ya might wanna hold on a bit tighter. It goes fast.”
Your lungs constricted. Suddenly this felt wrong. Dangerous.
“Wait— what about your shoulder? Should you be moving it—”
“‘M movin’ it less sittin’ on this thing than off’a it.”
“Well, shouldn’t we be wearing helmets or something?”
The vibration of his laugh echoed through his back, which you were practically pressed up against. You might've cared more about his flippant attitude if he hadn’t reverberated a particularly soothing warmth back into you.
“You chickenin’ out?”
“No. I’m just remembering every motorcycle crash horror story my brother told me.”
“He ride?”
“God, no. He was an ER nurse.”
“Well, we ain’t gonna crash.” Daryl rolled his shoulders back, and your grip tightened already. Nerves overcoming you. “Promise.”
His confidence was reassuring. His firm body, even more so.
“Alright then.” You nodded and the engine roared to life.
Daryl’s feet lifted off the ground, landing on the rests just in front of yours. He found his balance quickly, even with you wrapped around his back. The pace was slow at first, a steady crawl that seemed overpowered by the loud rumble of that engine below.
Then, when he finally passed the lot, he shot down the street.
You couldn’t even guess how fast he was going. The world around you started to slip away, a lost frame of reference. The trees lining the road blurred into splatters of green and red, like a watercolour painting, and the wind rustled through those strands of hair that hadn't made it into your ponytail this morning. Racing through the breeze, that chill came back. Cold, little shards of air splintering across your face and hands.
The sudden bolt of movement made your stomach drop, that fluttering feeling of emptiness finding its spot. It reminded you of riding a rollercoaster as a kid, holding your brother’s hand tight and putting on a brave face as the big sister. It might’ve worked all those years ago, but you were pretty sure he’d be laughing at you now. You squeaked like a mouse, digging your face into the warm leather at Daryl’s back. The threading of his angel wings tickled your face alongside your wild hair, and you felt that familiar rumble in his chest again.
“Ya alright?” He yelled back.
You sucked in a fresh breath of air and peeked an eye open. It felt like the bravest peek in the world— the blurry, fast world. Though still huddled behind Daryl, with a vice grip around his steady waist, you were sure it didn’t appear very courageous to anyone else.
“Fine!” You managed to reply, “I just didn’t expect that.”
His gruff voice was harsher when he had to speak over that deafening engine. You barely made out his next sentence: “Want me to slow down?”
You thought about it. But by the time you understood his offer, your eyes had opened completely, almost adjusted to the speed of the world around you. You even sat up properly, looking to your left as he raced past a strip of abandoned cars. That floating feeling inside your chest began to feel less dizzying, like Daryl’s waist was a tether to gravity as the bike ripped down the streets. He was always positioned firm and steady, like that beat of his heart you could feel against your cheek. You trusted him to keep you solid, even as the wind picked up.
“No,” you practically squealed with a newfound excitement. “Keep going!”
Much to your increasing delight, he kept that speed until you noticed a group of walkers at the end of the long-stretching road. He slowed down to turn, the joy and carefree adventure stained with reality, once again. The engine was loud. You glanced behind as Daryl bolted back through the street you’d just gone down, the blurry heads of the dead turning toward you in the distance. It’d been as good a sign as any to head back, with the gas slowly dwindling too.
When you reached the car garage again, the bike crawled back through the lot, allowing you to finally take a deep breath and catch that fluttering feeling in your stomach. The bike paused and the engine turned off. The stark difference in noise was shocking— some time down that road you forgot just how loud the engine was, and just how quiet the rest of the Earth was nowadays.
Daryl sat back, hands limply grasping the handlebars, head bowed to the beast of a motor below him. He seemed content from behind. Relaxed.
You leaned around his shoulder. “End of the line?”
He seemed to snap back into focus then, glancing at you.
“Gas is runnin’ low anyway.”
You nodded, but added hopefully, “Maybe we can find more?”
“We should use it for the car.”
You sighed, “I know.”
The engine was still warm underneath your legs. Your disappointment was just as fresh. That could’ve been your first and only chance on the back of a bike, for all you knew.
“Good first ride then?”
“Are you kidding?” You laughed. “I get it now. Horror stories be damned.”
He chuckled, even throwing you another glance back. But the second after your eyes met, his grin fell an inch. He turned his face away, too, and it hadn’t only taken a second longer for you to notice how close he was like this. You still wrapped around his back.
“Ya gotta move so—”
“Oh, sorry,” you mumbled, climbing off the bike. Trying to steady yourself on the ground was harder than you anticipated; your legs felt like jelly, already missing the smooth leather beneath you.
Your eyes caught on Daryl's vest as he also got off.
In front of you.
The bike balanced on its stand, Daryl on one side and you on the other. Something caught his attention, just above your eyes.
“Ya got…” He gestured with a lazy hand around the top of his head.
Your eyes went wide, hand flying up to the wild mess of your hair.
You patted down a patch. “There?”
“Yeah,” he cleared his throat, giving you the ghost of a smile.
You felt it again. Butterflies.
Fuck.
---
By the time you finished siphoning gas from the other cars, Daryl was done fixing the blue one. Throwing your few bags in the backseat, you climbed inside. You in the passenger seat, him behind the wheel. He liked to drive. It seemed to calm him, from that loose expression he wore.
“We’ll keep drivin’ west, see wha’ we can find.” Daryl gripped the steering wheel with one hand. The other lingered by his mouth, thumb occasionally gnawed at. “Can siphon gas from the cars on the road. Hunt for food, sleep in the back.”
“A home on wheels.” You rolled down the window as the car began to drift down the same streets you’d just sped through. The wind was softer than it had been on the bike. You already missed that terrifying, joyful freedom.
There was another way you could chase it, you realized. You started to dig through the glove compartment.
“Whatcha lookin’ for?”
“CDs, hopefully.”
His eyes flickered over you. Hair now brushed, let loose from that ponytail and tucked behind your ear as you leaned forward. The sun was still strong late into the afternoon, direct rays landing across the dashboard and reflecting onto you. It explained that glow you had.
“God, I’d listen to anything at this point.”
Daryl glanced over to the road, but his attention didn’t slip off you completely.
It never seemed to, anymore.
“Here.” You popped the cd from its case and rubbed it against the soft fabric of your sweater. “Can’t believe this is the only one. Who the hell owned this car?”
Daryl’s lip twitched up at your soft snark. “You a music snob or somethin’?”
“No.” You rolled your eyes. “I was just hoping for something better.”
With one hand off the wheel, he clicked on the radio. Static rumbled from the speakers until he slid the dusty cd inside. The dark melody was slow, something that reminded him of those nights in the same run-down bar in the early nineties. A favourite of his uncle, then his brother, and while the pair of them served a stint in jail, Daryl’s.
It was strange, feeling better off without your family by your side. But Daryl had all his life to get used to that thought. It wasn’t until he made his own family, then lost them, that he felt the opposite. He missed that group more than he could say, missed that feeling of purpose they gave him.
Though, as the days rolled on, you were beginning to fill that ache in his chest, too.
“Sure there’s nothin’ else in there?”
You checked again, but it was mostly a polite gesture. There hadn’t been much in there, anyway. A pair of old gloves that you’d already stuffed in your bag, some tissue, the lone cd, and a brochure.
“Only this.” You flickered through the pages of the sale brochure. It was for the development of a small community, units starting in the low three hundreds. The prospective opening date was off by a few years, though. You doubted they’d even broken ground before everything fell apart.
“You really don’t like it?”
“Ain’t exactly a fan,” he grumbled. There was a flash of disappointment across your face, caught in the corner of his eye. His frown lifted a bit. “’S fine, though. Ain’t a big deal, neither.”
“What are you a fan of then?” You tossed the brochure back inside the box. “Now that we have a radio, next time I’m scavenging I’ll keep an eye out.”
Daryl thought for a moment. “I dunno. Only really listened to what Merle liked.”
You blinked, brows knitting a centimetre closer.
“You spent a lot of time with him?”
“When he was around.”
Something stung in your chest. No, your heart. From the sparse details Daryl spared about his brother, Merle didn’t seem the reliable type. Every story he told was followed with stiffness. Those memories were distant and cold— the type of coolness that grew from hurt, not time.
You knew to tread lightly.
“What’d you guys do?”
“Whatever.” Daryl shrugged. “Drank. Went huntin’. Nothin’ special.”
“So you hunted even before this?”
“Mhm.”
“Merle taught you?”
“My dad.”
“Oh.”
Daryl had never mentioned a parent before. Given the age gap, you’d assumed Merle had probably raised him a good chunk of his childhood. When he was around, anyway.
That cold tone Daryl had for his brother extended to his father, also. A part of you wondered if that hurt had been deep, too. Maybe as deep as those scars on his back.
It was an insensitive thought. Unfair. Daryl didn’t owe you anything, and he certainly didn’t deserve you stuffing your nose in his family’s business.
“Do you like hunting?”
“I liked the forest. Liked eatin’.” It was better than being home. “But I didn’t do it ‘cause I liked it. Was jus’ somethin’ I had to learn.”
With a nod, you went quiet. A softly contemplative look on your face. It piqued his interest, a flutter of nerves catching in his gut.
“Why ya askin’?”
“Just curious,” you answered. “You’re the only person I’ve had out here that didn’t jump at every snap of a branch.”
“Well I got practice,” he said. “Stuck with a lotta city folk, then?”
You turned back to him then, a sly smile hanging off your lips. “I’m city folk.”
“Yeah, I figured.”
You laughed, “Oh yeah? Why’s that?”
“Cause you’re jumpy, too,” Daryl scoffed. “Scared’a your own damn shadow.”
“I like the forest,” you defended with a slight pitch to your words. It made Daryl smirk, too. “I just don’t like how dark it can get. It’s freaky. I’ll never get used to it. Maybe all those bright city lights mess with your brain after all.”
Daryl nodded, and he knew the moment had presented itself. The tone shifted a bit serious when he finally asked the question that’d be pressing him.
“Atlanta, then?”
“Briefly.” You nodded. “My brother and I were visiting before everything happened.”
“Heard it was bad there.”
It was. It’d taken a long time to stop waking up in a sweat with memories of that night.
Still, you shrugged. “It was bad everywhere.”
“Yeah, but they weren’t droppin’ bombs everywhere.”
“I got out before that.”
Good timing.
“We were only there for two weeks. If the trip had been a month later, or earlier, we wouldn’t have been anywhere close to Georgia when this thing hit.”
Daryl felt something fester in his gut. Anxiety? That distant, non-existent what-if made him shift in his seat. He could feel it looking over your side profile— the curve of your nose and lips, the soft flutter of eyelashes— and it hit him like that bullet had. Fast.
It was true. You’d grown on him. He cared.
“You’re not from Georgia?”
You shook your head. “Nope.”
“Explains the accent.”
“Or lack thereof,” you countered. “I like yours though. It's charming.”
Daryl scoffed, and you gave him a look.
“What? I’m being serious. You have a nice voice.”
A pretty shade of light pink scattered across his cheeks. You couldn’t help that loose smile you wore. It was nice to make him nervous, for once. Of course, you weren’t about to rub it in his face. You glanced away, eyes caught in the fast shades of green, orange, and red passing by the window.
“What about you? Where were you at the start?”
Daryl cleared his throat. “Same place I’d always been. Hometown.”
“You never left?”
“Nah.”
“Not even for college or…”
His grip on the steering wheel tightened, and he tried not to side-eye your reaction when he finally muttered, “Didn’t go.”
Though that part of him that held all those pessimistic, self-doubts was a strong force to be reckoned with. He didn’t need to prove himself— never cared to before— but now here he was, sitting with that gnawing feeling in his gut, wanting to.
And yet, you barely even shrugged.
“I almost didn’t go, either,” you said nonchalantly, eyes running over the back of the CD case. “You ever wish you had, though?”
“Nah.”
“Fair enough. I think you could’ve been good at it, though. You’re very…”
Daryl waited, brow hitched as you hummed.
“Intuitive.” You’d decided. “You know, you have good instincts. Sometimes it feels like you know what’s gonna happen before it does.”
He sat with those words a moment, then offered one of his own: “Observant.”
“Yeah, exactly. Maybe you could’ve been a lawyer… Or a cop.”
“Nah,” Daryl huffed. “Cops ’n I never got along well.”
“No?” You teased. “You used to get into trouble, Dixon?”
“Merle did. Guess I tagged along for the ride.” He shrugged. “Like I said, I was a dumbass.”
“You being a dumbass— that’s hard to imagine.”
“I didn’t have to,” he quipped.
You smiled at the easy wit that always just seemed to flow from him.
“So you didn’t leave town before this?”
“Not really. Never even left Georgia.”
“Seriously?”
He shook his head.
“Well, maybe after we pick up your friends we can go on a road trip.”
Daryl gave you a look. It was questioning, sure, but gentle. “Plannin’ on stickin’ around then?”
“Well, I uh…” you paused. Curiously, you hadn’t thought about it much. Since those initially tense first days together, the possibility of parting ways with Daryl, not because of a feverish worry or a herd, but because your shared journey had reached an end, hadn’t come to mind often. The two of you hadn’t been together long, but you’d already been through a lot. Patching the other up, too many close calls to count, sharing what little supplies you had… just to say ‘see ya!’ after everything felt wrong. Incomplete.
“If you’d let me. I don’t really have anywhere else to go— anyone else.”
“Alright.” Daryl nodded.
It was a short acknowledgement. A single word. It still made you smile.
Daryl wasn’t like most people. He was forgiving and insightful. He let you live when you probably deserved to die because he wasn’t like most people. All you knew about the others was that they’d earned Daryl’s loyalty at some point, and made their own way into his sentiment, too. If he trusted them, you hoped that meant you could too.
Hoped.
Worry crept back in. Maybe the others wouldn’t want you there. The stain of the prison could’ve been enough to taint your reputation, completely, even if Daryl vouched for you. And, if it came down to it, choosing between you and them, there was no doubt in your mind. He wouldn’t pick the girl he knew for a couple of weeks over his real family.
It poured out faster than you meant. Words slipped, mumbled and stuttered, “You think they might— might wanna kill me? Or, I don’t know, cut me loose?”
“Tha’ ain’t gonna happen.” Daryl watched the road. “They’re good people. Like you.”
The weight of worry lifted off your chest again. He had a talent for that.
You smiled.
Good people.
You tried to hide the flush at your cheeks and chest, glancing out the window. “How’d you find them anyway?”
“At the start, Merle ’n I were in the middle’a huntin’. Didn’t even know ‘bout the walkers until I found one out there, ’n it tried to take a bite outta me.”
“Shit,” you hissed.
“Douchebag was all over me. Smelt somethin’ awful. I started yellin’, screamin’ at the thing. Punchin’ him. He jus’ kept coming, then Merle shot it.” He scoffed, “Thought I was ‘bout to serve hard time for murder, till Merle said he’d heard something on the truck’s radio ‘bout dead bastards comin’ back to life. We left for Atlanta after tha’.”
“Refugee camps?”
“Never made it. That was when we found the others on the road. We stayed up by a quarry for a while. It wasn’t safe, so we kept movin’, till we found the prison. ‘Bout a year ago.”
“You stayed there a year?”
Daryl nodded. “We lost a lot gettin’ there. Made somethin’ of it, though.”
“I didn’t think anything like that could be real.” You shook your head.
He met your look. It’d gone from smiling to serious in a few sentences. That slight bite at your lip, a quiver in your brow.
“It was," he said.
“Do you think you could ever have that again?”
Of course, he’d thought about it. Even if he tried not to, those memories of the prison and the community they built from a grey, desolate building— a prison— were overwhelming. It was the first time in maybe his whole life that he felt a purpose. People didn’t just depend on him. They accepted him. They liked him.
He stole another look at you. That bloom of familiarity was deep in his chest, again.
“Maybe.”
---
Another hour passed. The sun was softer, a cold breeze shifting through that open window until you finally rolled it back up. You still stared outside, watching the trees slip by.
Daryl had traced the backroads back to the main road leaving the prison, and you’d been travelling west since. The same way he’d seen the bus go. It seemed strange that they hadn’t come up with an official rendezvous spot, just a last chance at loading on that bus together. But maybe a more detailed plan would’ve been useless anyway; places didn’t last long, nowadays.
The car rolled to a stop. Your head lulled to face forward, finding a slight ache in your neck when you finally tore your eyes away from the window. A question sat at the tip of your tongue, about to slip when your eyes landed on the answer.
Instead, you gasped, “Oh my God.”
There, sitting in the road, was the bus.
Splatters of blood painted the siding. A dozen or so bodies sprawled by the back door. Some were piled on top of each other, limbs mixed. Others lay alone. All of them had turned before they were put down for good.
You could just tell.
From the corner of your eye, you noticed his white-knuckle grip around the steering wheel. The veins in his hands popped out, muscle turned into stone, and there was no use in glancing up at him; you already knew that look of pain— despair— he had. Could practically feel him begin to bottle up every word, emotion, or care.
You were the first one to exit the car.
Goosebumps broke out on your skin as a cold breeze took hold. That chill sunk into your skin with the sound of the second door opening, and something stiff and heavy clouded behind you.
It was coming from him. You knew that already. It made that pit of dread in your gut even heavier.
Was it fury he was feeling? Grief?
Even when you finally did glance back at him, lingering by the car's side, you still couldn’t say for sure. That glossy look in his eye was certainly bitter. Tense with emotion that you knew he was fighting to reign in. It left him with a dark glare as he stared at the dead faces of his people— the only ones he’d known for sure got out. He had practice keeping that type of anger silent. Not the one that made you punch some asshole at the bar, but the type that was born out of misery and regret.
He’d been abrasive at the cabin. Then softer after the pharmacy. Even strained in the cottage, with you tending to his back. But he’d never forced himself numb before, not like this. You could tell he was holding back. A guttural scream, you thought, from the tension in his neck and that vein threatening to pop out where a swollen bump had been a few days prior.
But his lips drew shut in a taut line, and he was quieter than the rustle of the trees.
It made your stomach knot. Though, you were sure it was no worse than what he might have been feeling— if he'd let himself. His only lead: bloody, dead, and rotting in the middle of the road. If you’d kept driving, the tires would’ve ripped through decaying muscle and crushed bone.
It wasn’t fair.
The gas station. His wounds. The bus. These people, lying like trash on the road. No more significant than the withering leaves beside them.
There wasn’t the time, nor the energy, to spend digging graves. But you dragged each limp body, one by one, to the side of the road. Right where the grass bled into the concrete, they laid.
Sometime around the third body, Daryl began to help. He picked up the opposite limb with his good arm, then eventually his bad one too.
Nothing but that gloss across his eye to tell you these people meant anything to him. He was retreating by the second. Crawling back into that ugly pit of animosity and cynicism that always seemed to have a spot waiting for him. Each body you moved reaffirmed it. Pushed him deeper as hollow eyes fell on the cold faces of the people he cared about. He fed. He protected.
Or, tried to.
It was never enough.
-> part 9
A/N: so much happened in this part I mean... reader finally realizing she might have a lil crush on him... the bike ride... the car conversation... THE BUS
anyway. back to our regular scheduled bad shit happening to our fav fictional characters. if u have any predictions or thoughts, lmk :p
FYI: I'm expecting to miss next weeks posting. I have too much to do with exams, sorry! after that ill be graduated so lots of free time coming up lol.
if you’re reading this, thank you! I hope you enjoyed this chapter. please feel free to leave feedback, it helps so much and I love to read it. have a lovely day <3
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