#Aww. Look at Ellie's beaming face.

[schmweed]

#David Tennant #Alec Hardy #Ellie Miller #Broadchurch #my gifs #Ellie just keeps sparing him any direct eye contact outside of serious work-related situations #And he only looks at her when she's looking away #The way Ellie lights up when she realizes what he's saying. #That 'mostly' from him is the kindest most genuine and delightfully playful way of expressing how much she means to him #Love how she lets him know she doesn't believe he lost his phone and therefore her number and yet doesn't give him a hard time abt it #he's too brilliant a detective not to have memorized her number or found a way to say hi #It's just that she probably thinks he didn't care enough #I think Tess gave him an ultimatum -- stop contacting his outstanding Miller if they're going to make this work or Tess won't try #How many times do you think he looked at Ellie's number when he was alone and ached to contact her in any way #Especially given how concerned he was abt her at the end of S2 #But trying to fix the family came first and honestly he's a wonderful human to do that for his daughter's sake #I think he's relieved Ellie would never in her wildest dreams suspect that's why -- but he still wishes he could tell her. #Complicated doesn't begin to cover it. But he decides basking in her presence for their endless hours of work has to be enough. Oh Alec. #Aww. Look at Ellie's beaming face. #I love them so much! <3

[zuhamuses]

♡ " The side effect "

Suitor: William Rex x Kate (MC)

Fandom: Ikemen Villains

CW: none!! Just fluff and chaos lol ♡

Prompt: Dressed in love

Note: My entry for @judejazza 's event!! I hope everyone likes this. Divider and header made by the lovely @natimiles <3

No one was expecting that the medicine Roger gave her would have this effect on her. He had first wanted to give it to Liam, but he wasn't present. Roger's second option was Ellis... who was also not in the castle.

It was something he had created himself. Roger had full faith that the medicine had the ability to heal a person quicker. A flu, migraine, anything else? You were gonna feel fine in no time (okay, somewhat of an exaggeration). That's when he heard that Kate was feeling unwell and... yes.

"Oh? Who is this beautiful young man...?" Kate's eyes were fixed on William as soon as he entered the infirmary.

He smiled at his lover and gave Roger a look.

"Ah, right. She will be fine in a day. Seems like I made a mistake with the medicine."

William nodded his head, the smile still on his face, and he went closer to Kate.

"Hello, Kate. How are you feeling?"

She giggled. "Great! Now that I have seen such a handsome guy. What's your name?"

He laughed, realizing that she was having troubling remembering him. Ah, it was somewhat sad. They were meant to go on a date but...

"William Rex at your service. So, Kate..."

Her big eyes were staring at him the entire time, and a goofy smile was on her face.

"Your eyes are telling me that you like me. Will you give me your time and spend the day with me?"

She gasped and quickly stood up, moving towards the stairs. "YES! What are you waiting for, pretty guy? Let's go! This feels like a dream - it must be - but I won't let my chance slip."

William laughed again and went after her. Roger cleared his throat. Well, that was interesting...

In the parlour:

Kate stared at everyone present in the room. Her face showed it clearly that she didn't remember any of them. Harrison and Liam were sitting and having a talk when they stopped to look at Kate.

"Woah, Katie! What happened?" Liam asked.

"Katie?" She asked, "You know me?"

"Will! What's wrong with her?" Liam looked crestfallen.

The red-eyed man laughed and shook his head. "She will be fine in a day, Liam. Don't worry."

Harrison chuckled. "You look like you are in a trance."

Kate nodded her head, suddenly very serious. "There are too many pretty boys here," she looked at William, "but I think you are the only one for me."

Harrison's eyes went wide, and Liam choked on his own spit.

"HUH?!" Liam let out.

"Damn... she's still in love with you despite her 'temporary case of amnesia'". Harry's voice was full of amusement.

William was biting back a laugh as he followed behind Kate, who was running towards the kitchen. She looked like a little child on a sugar rush.

In the kitchen:

"Oh! Pretty guy with long hair!" Her first instinct was to touch Victor's hair. The Queen's Aide was beaming at her.

"Aww! You flatter me, Miss Kate!"

William raised an eyebrow at his old friend, smile not faltering. "She's still mine, Victor."

"Aww, shucks. Kate you are just so cute!!! Would you like this fresh scone I made?"

"Ooooh! Yes, please."

And Kate was given a plate full of scones by Victor...

In the dining hall:

"Oh, hello, Kate!" Ellis warmly smiled at her. "Is there something wrong?"

"Ohhhh, pretty boy number four. I am fine. It's a weird medicine, and I think I have a memory loss, and I feel weird. But I am fine." She looked at Jude, "You look like a gang boss."

"Tch. Yeah, gon' make your ass go bankrupt."

"Haha, okay." Kate laughed.

Jude's brows were furrowed. He didn't even want to ask any questions.

"Come on, Will! Let's go outside!" She smiled at him. A smile that always had him weak.

"After you, my lady."

In the garden:

"You look really beautiful." Kate told Elbert.

"Oh... thank you. Al, am I beautiful?"

"Yes, of course... what kind of ideas are you having?"

"... nothing."

Kate took William's hand. "Hey... I am feeling dizzy."

He carried his lover to her room.

---

"Hmm... I still don't remember much." She told him. "My heart starts beating super fast when I look at you, though."

"Hmm? Really?"

"Yes. You have such pretty eyes... your hair looks so smooth, and you smell divine. Hmm, Will?"

"Yes, my love?"

"Can I borrow your cape...? It's cold."

He laughed. "Of course."

It looked better on her than it did on him. William wondered how she would look if she wore his clothes. Hmm, adorable. But first, he had to make sure his lover would feel normal again.

#☆ musings ☆ #ikevil x reader #ikevil imagines #ikemen villains #william x reader #william rex x reader #invitation2crownCC

[theasstour]

𝐅𝐈𝐂 𝐏𝐀𝐆𝐄 | 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓: 𝟐𝟎.𝟐𝐤 𝐍𝐁: 𝐚𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐡𝐨𝐥, 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐭 𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐮𝐚𝐠𝐞, 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡, 𝐬𝐞𝐱𝐮𝐚𝐥 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭

A/N: Thank you so incredibly much to each one of you angels who voted for ST in the 1D Craft Awards 🥺 You continue to take my breath away with all your kindness, support and love 🐚🌊✨ ENJOYYY CHAPTER 7! x

Saturday, 25 July

The phone vibrated against the wooden table, jolting Y/N out of her focus. She blinked a few times, looking over at Fatima who turned the timer off and looked at Y/N with expectant eyes. Y/N shook her head and Fatima’s face visibly fell.

“What you mean?”

“I didn’t finish, did I?” Y/N groaned, running her hands over her face, hiding it from view for a few seconds before she sat back in her chair and looked at her laptop in front of her. The two were sitting at Olive’s Café on Island Square, seated on lime green chairs outside, the morning sun beating down on them as each of them tried to do work; Fatima looking through the curriculum she was going to teach this coming year, and Y/N doing her UCAT work. Fatima was a teacher for fourth graders, so she knew how to make things easy to understand, how to pull things apart and study properly. When Fatima had suggested that the two of them take a day together to just study, Y/N had jumped at the opportunity. Now, they had met to do exactly this a few days in a row and Y/N was really starting to feel the effects.

The thought of the UCAT exam coming closer and closer made her want to hurl. September 10th didn’t seem that far away anymore, something that absolutely terrified Y/N. Not only did she need to be out of St Ives by then, leaving her entire life and friends here behind, but she didn’t know where she’d even be. Would she even have enough money? Would she still be in Cornwall? Would she have crawled with her tail between her legs back to Winchester, asking for forgiveness for leaving them all behind?

Fatima pursed her lips, tapping her pen against the top of Y/N’s laptop. “Is it ‘cause you’re stressing too much?”

“Probs.”

“It’s hard not to when it’s important to you.”

Y/N sighed heavily, nodding her head in agreement. “This practice exam… well, it was hard.”

“They usually are, the practice exams,” Fatima explained. “Not necessarily so to scare you, more so that you’ll be aware that this will be hard, but the actual exam isn’t that bad. They never are.”

Y/N gave Fatima a little smile. “Taken the UCAT before?”

“Obvs, I’m the smartest bitch in all of the UK, if not Europe.”

Y/N laughed, quickly sighing again as she looked down at her laptop again. This was the first practice exam she had ever taken; Fatima had timed her to see if she’d make it in the estimated time it took to complete the UCAT, but Y/N hadn’t managed to. She supposed she still had a lot of time to study and prepare herself, but it still made her feel like all her studying had been for absolutely nothing. One failure, even if it didn’t mean much in the grand scheme of things, always seemed like the most important thing in the world. How had the world not shifted? How was not everyone around her crying like she felt she should be doing?

“Don’t be so hard on yourself, Y/N. I promise you’ll be fine.”

She nodded, knowing deep down that Fatima was right. The universe would balance itself out eventually, everything would be alright in the end even if her current world was crumbling right before her eyes. Maybe she was just being dramatic, maybe it wasn’t that deep and she had just not been focused enough, but Y/N felt like giving up now.

“When I feel like I’m failing at life,” Fatima started, sitting up a bit straighter in her seat. “I pick up a pillow and I just scream into it.”

Y/N blinked.

Fatima grinned.

“You just scream? How?”

“Just like you’d normally scream,” Fatima chuckled, demonstrating by pretending to pick up a pillow, burying her face in it, and silently screaming. “And after that, I feel better.”

“Like a proper scream?”

“Like you’re being chased down the street by a man in a clown costume holding an axe.”

Y/N smiled, shaking her head some. “I’ll do that when I get back to the Inn. Immediately.”

Fatima laughed just as someone came up beside them, asking the man sitting beside them if the chair opposite him was taken. When the tiny, short-haired blonde sat down beside them, she beamed from ear to ear. There was something about Ellie’s presence that just made everything better. She was so round, so small, so joyous all the time that it felt wrong to be in a sulky mood when she was around.

“I heard you’re studying,” Ellie said, perching her yellow sunglasses on the top of her head. “And by the looks of it-“ Ellie mimicked what Fatima had just done with the scream. “-It’s not going so well.”

“Y/N’s studying for that dentist test and she tried one of them practice exams, didn’t go so well.”

“Aww.” Ellie pouted. “I’ll buy you a cupcake to cheer you up. I always eat tons when I’m sad, especially sweets. Especially, especially cupcakes.”

“Thanks for the offer, but-“

“-Ima, you want a cupcake as well?” Ellie put her purse down on her chair as she got up, holding onto her card. “Or a new iced latte?”

Fatima brought a hand to her chin, pretending to think about it, making exaggerated thinking noises till Ellie blurted a “today!” that made Fatima chuckle and say, “Both please, babe.”

Ellie smiled. “Girls, you know what I think we should do after this?” She waited for a few seconds for either of them to say something, but when they didn’t Ellie went on. “Go to the beach! You can’t be sad when you’re at the beach! We’ll sunbathe, have a bit of a swim, and then go for a Cheeky V at the pub after.”

Fatima smiled a little, looking at Y/N to see if she’d be into that.

Though all Y/N wanted to do was go back to the Inn and scream into her pillow, she smiled up at Ellie. “Yeah, why not? Have a bit of a girls day.”

“Oh, my gosh, that’s exactly what it is as well,” Ellie gasped, grinning from ear to ear. “BRB, ladies, I’m getting us something sweet.” Ellie was off into Olive’s Café greeting an acquaintance loudly before she went over to talk to them. Fatima only shook her head some, turning back to the book in front of her.

“You’ll figure it out, Y/N.”

“The UCAT?” she asked, looking at her laptop again, feeling her stomach drop at the sight of the practice exam again.

“Everything,” Fatima answered with so much conviction that for a moment, Y/N almost believed her.

“Alright, crew,” Dax called as they pulled into the farm, its lush and green landscape opening up around them. “Just warning you now, I’m gonna absolutely crush you tonight. I go for the title of champion even if it means I’m gonna have to lose some friends.”

“Sad, that,” Fatima sighed. “Seeing as you’ve never won before, what makes you think you’re gonna win this year?”

Amir turned to look at them from where he sat shotgun. “Dax, you may try to win, but we all know the former singer and frontman of Astronaut Lions will go home champion tonight.”

“You are a terrible singer, Amir. Dunno why we let you even sing,” Jo groaned.

“’Cause I’ve got a silky-smooth, delicious, fantastic-“

“-Shut up, mate!” Ellie groaned, making Jo laugh and give her a high five.

Harry stopped his van, killing the engine before Dax got up and opened the door for everything in the backseats. Y/N made sure no one could see her bum as she descended from the car, keeping her hands by her buttocks to keep her pleated lilac skirt from showing too much of her skin. She put her purse on her shoulder, letting it hang over her white crop cardigan. Music could be heard from the large barn, some awful singing streamed out from the open entrance as people walked out, laughing and carrying empty plates. The farm was just as beautiful as Y/N remembered it, now smelling of delicious barbeque and sounding of hens, chatter, and the occasional failed high-note. The karaoke night seemed to be under full way, the courtyard brimming with people, the same went for the inside of the barn it seemed.

Y/N, Fatima and Ellie fell into step beside one another as they walked over to the gate, Harry opening it for the rest, gesturing for them to walk in before him. When Y/N reached him last he gave her a little smile, eyes falling to the gravel under his feet.

“Harry!” Grace yelled, running from the grill where Uncle Tim, Jessa, and lolo stood looking at the food. “Harry, Harry, Harry!”

“There she is!” Harry bent down as Grace came running, wrapping his arms around her and spinning her around, her feet dangling in the air.

“Alright, Mr Flores?” Dax asked as he walked up to the grill, putting a hand on lolo’s shoulder. Lolo grinned up at Dax, saying something that Y/N didn’t catch as Amir let out a loud groan hitting his chest with both hands.

“Let’s go! Gonna belt Material Girl in approximately five minutes, everyone come watch to have your life changed!” Amir ran into the barn, shouting something as he met a few familiar faces inside.

“After a few pints he’ll try Gentleman,” Fatima sighed. “Someone should cover Gracie’s ears then.”

“That SL song?” Jo asked. “Nah, he better do Wiley Flow, or else I’m gonna have to challenge him to a rap battle.”

“Amir’s got no chance of keeping up with any of Stormzy’s songs,” Ellie pointed out matter-of-factly, scrunching up her nose. “Anyway,” Ellie stopped Jo before they started talking. “We’re doing Sugababes, yeah? About You Now?”

“Obvs!” Fatima exclaimed, offended that Ellie might’ve thought otherwise. “And Y/N’s joining us.”

“Oh!” Y/N raised her eyebrows, chuckling a little as Fatima wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “It’s been a while since I’ve heard a Sugababes song.”

“They’re immense, aren’t they?” Ellie grinned. “I used to listen to Push The Button on repeat when I was like 12.”

“Was more of a Too Lost in You type of girl,” Y/N said, making Fatima gasp and Ellie bring a hand up to her chest.

“We’re doing Too Lost in You!” Ellie clapped her hands frantically. “Oh, my life! Legendary!”

“Of course,” Fatima smiled. “You wanna sing, yeah?”

“Let me down three ciders and I’ll be good to go.”

Jo laughed, gesturing for Y/N to follow them over to the main house where the four of them helped themselves to something to drink. Y/N glanced out of the kitchen window at the Styles-Flores family where they stood by the grill, sipping her cider. Grace sat on Harry’s shoulders, hands in his hair as she giggled at something. Harry had both his hands wrapped around his little sister’s ankles, holding her in place. Jessa was grinning at the two while Uncle Tim stood talking by the grill, asking lolo if what he was doing was alright, not having grilled this specific type of Filipino dish before. Dax stood chatting to one of Harry’s aunts, if it was Rachel or Abby, Y/N could not for the life of herself remember, but she noticed Harry’s aunt’s kids running around the grill, shouting at one another and laughing.

Y/N had never experienced a dynamic like this before. This family was so welcome, so big, so loving, and it made her happy to just watch them and know that, for a split second in time, she had been part of it. Maybe not a real part of it because this was not her family after all, but she had been touched by their warmth and been their guest for a time being. She would forever be grateful for that. Love tasted like Jessa’s lumpia, radiated like lolo’s approving smile, smelled like Grace’s hair after she had been out plucking wildflowers, and felt like Harry’s arms wrapped around her. Nothing would ever be quite like this.

“Let’s go to the barn,” Ellie said.

“I’ll just go say hi to Jessa,” Y/N announced, giving them all a smile before she walked outside and over to the grill where everyone was standing.

“Y/N!” Jessa exclaimed, opening her arms for her. Y/N grinned, walking over and doing the mano po on both Jessa and lolo. “How have you been? Don’t feel like I’ve seen you in ages.” Jessa swatted Harry’s arm, making him flinch away. “He’s keeping you all to himself, isn’t he?”

“I’ve been busy, nanay!” Harry said, furrowing his brows at his step-mum.

“Karaoke is huge in the Philippines,” Jessa explained, as she linked her arm with Y/N’s bringing her over to the grill where lolo and Tim were standing. “It is an understatement to say that Filipinos love karaoke, I daresay. Almost every Filipino home has a karaoke machine, Harry’s dad bought ours when we first moved here, but we put it out in the barn ‘cause we don’t really use it unless there’s a karaoke night, like tonight.”

“How nice, this is a tradition then? Each summer?”

“Yeah, we have a karaoke barbeque night every summer, everyone’s invited!” Jessa beamed. “It’s a fantastic way to just relax, forget about everything for a little while, belt your heart out to some of your favourite songs.”

Y/N smiled, eyes landing on the grill.

“Alright, Y/N?” Tim asked, smiling at her. “We made some tempeh for you, some Filipino barbeque sauce on it that’s out of this world. Not surprised, though, when Jessa made it.”

“Oh!” Jessa waved her hand as if to dismiss the compliment, but squeezed his shoulder. “I’m excited to see what you think. It was either tempeh or baos, thought you might like this a bit more.”

Y/N took a plate and a fork and watched as Tim put some food on her plate, thanking him once it was done. She picked up the tempeh and blew on it before she took a bite out of it, chewing it thoroughly and smiling at Jessa after swallowing.

“That’s brilliant.”

“Ahh! You think?” Jessa grinned, looking from Tim and back to Y/N, then at lolo. “Amá, Y/N liked the tempeh we made.”

Lolo smiled at Y/N and looked at her plate, nodding slowly. “You have to come and make some food with us once. You are part of the family now; we can show you our secret recipes.”

Y/N chuckled some before swallowing her bite of tempeh. “Wouldn’t say I’m part of the family, but thank you-“

“-Nonsense!” Jessa exclaimed, shaking her head furiously. “You are here, you’re making Harry happy, and since you’ve come to St Ives, the world’s been a brighter place. You’re where you need to be.”

For some reason, Y/N couldn’t quite believe what Jessa was saying. She knew it was coming from a good place, that she meant that it was nice to have Y/N there, but her family was in Winchester, she couldn’t possibly come into a new one and then ruin that one as well. This family she was visiting in St Ives would do just fine without her when she left in August. No one would miss her once she had been gone for a week, that was just a fact. Y/N was so bloody lost, she did not know what to do once her and Harry “broke up”, but she knew she would not disappoint and make any of the people around her sad, she refused.

Instead, Y/N smiled as she took the last bite of the tempeh, chewing and swallowing before she said. “Harry said something about an end of summer party.”

“Yes! I wanted to talk to you about that! Because, on the topic of food,” Jessa smiled back. “If you could give me some of your favourite vegetarian dishes, I’d love to make them for you! It would be amazing for many others to try something new as well.”

“I’d be more than happy to help out,” Y/N said, looking over at Grace as she sat on Dax’s back, the blonde man running around in circles as Harry ran after them, growling and acting like a disformed monster of sorts. She smiled a little at the sight, he looked absolutely ridiculous. How was he still cute? “I’ll bring the veggie food and I’ll show you how to make those, and then you show me how to make some Filipino dishes as well.”

Jessa placed a hand over her heart, beaming at Y/N. “You are an absolute treasure, me lover.”

Y/N smiled, eating some more of the tempeh. “When should I come and help out?”

“Are you free Tuesday?”

“Yeah, I don’t have any plans as of now.”

“Great! Harry will drive you here then. It’ll just be me, amá, Gracie, and Harry, and now you.” Jessa put her hand on Y/N’s arm, squeezing her lovingly before she turned to answer a question Tim asked her about the food he was currently grilling.

Y/N looked in the direction of Harry, Dax and Grace again, now walking towards the house. Jessa must have noticed Y/N staring in their direction because she linked her arm through Y/N’s and the two walked in the direction of the house as well.

“There’s more food inside,” she explained, grinning from ear to ear. “We do grill a lot, but Tim’s not really the best with the grill and he always insists on grilling at these gatherings, I don’t really have the heart to tell him no.” Jessa led Y/N into the dining room where she remembered all the food had been served at Grace’s birthday party. Again, casserole upon casserole stood spread over the dining table, covering it completely. Most of the dishes were all dug into, some almost completely wiped from the casseroles.

“Here,” Jessa said as she led Y/N over to the table. “I made your lumpia, there’s a few other vegetarian options as well.”

The fact that Jessa thought of this, thought of Y/N’s preference and made life a little easier for her, was so greatly appreciated that it nearly brought tears to Y/N’s eyes.

“This is biko,” Jessa explained, pointing to a casserole filled with banana leaves, a brown dish resting in it. “It’s a rice cake made from malagkit, or sticky rice, coconut milk, and brown sugar. Like other rice cakes, it is referred to as kakanin, taken from the word kanin which means rice, and is often eaten as a dessert or meryenda, meaning a mid-afternoon snack.”

“It looks lovely,” Y/N said, reaching for the spoon to get herself a slice before it was all eaten up. “Know we’re probably not set for dessert just yet, but I might just need some.”

Jessa laughed, smiling as Y/N took a bite of the biko. “What do you reckon, darling?”

“Heavenly, Jessa.”

Jessa clapped her hands together in delight, grinning from ear to ear as Y/N went in for another bite. “You have to try the buko pie next.”

“Which one’s that?”

Jessa pointed to a golden pie, not waiting for any sort of reply before cutting Y/N a small piece, placing it on Y/N’s plate. “It’s a sweet and rich pie made from young coconut meat.”

“Oh?”

“Buko pies are mostly sold in southern parts of Luzon in the Philippines. There’s this specific store down there called Collette’s that serves the best buko pie. I will never be able to replicate it, but I will try my hardest, every time I make a buko pie,” Jessa smiled. “We need to take you to Luzon, Y/N, you’d love it. Once we’ve saved up and all that.”

“This is the best buko pie I’ve ever tasted at least,” Y/N said, and Jessa laughed again looking out through the window only to sigh deeply.

“I need to go out there, it seems Tim is struggling and amá cannot be asked to help him out.” Jessa sprinted out, shouting something at Tim that Y/N didn’t catch but by the look on all the relatives standing around and Tim’s face, it couldn’t have been good. Y/N smiled a little, eating the rest of her pie before she realised she heard music. This wasn’t the type streaming out from the barn, this was coming from inside the house. And it was coming from the piano.

Y/N walked into the kitchen and placed her now empty plate on the kitchen counter before walking over to the dining room again, walking over to the doorway leading into the living room. With Grace on his lap, Harry was sitting by the piano, playing a tune Y/N had never heard before. It was both hopeful and very sad, unlike anything Y/N had ever heard before. There was no note sheet in front of him as he played, his eyes were only on the keys in front of him. Grace sometimes leaned forward and pressed a key she wasn’t supposed to, looking up at Harry while she giggled before leaning into him again, listening to the rest of the song.

“Can you play that other one?” Grace asked as Harry continued to play.

“What other one? There are quite a few, Gracie.”

“She means the one about me,” Dax grinned, standing beside the piano with his arms crossed, a massive grin on his face. “Go on, Hazza. Play that one inspired by Sexy Back.”

“Watch your mouth,” Harry hissed through gritted teeth, making his best friend laugh.

“Noooo!” Grace laughed. “The one you wrote after you, me and Y/N went to St Austell. The one about that trip.”

“Ahh, haven’t heard that one before,” Dax said, walking over to sit on the sofa beside the piano, watching the two siblings as they settled in again. Grace pressed one of the keys, looking up at Harry who smiled down at her and shook his head. He took her hand, bringing her finger over to the correct starting note, pressing it down for a long while so she’d get the feel of it. Then, he brought her to the next one, slowly playing the melody out before Grace motioned for Harry to take over for her.

What Harry produced just pressing a couple of keys at just the right moment was so breath-taking that Y/N almost felt dizzy. There was something to this melody that words weren’t ready to properly convey yet, something that was too powerful for a simple human brain to comprehend. Y/N understood why Harry wrote songs now. This melody captured that day perfectly. Her heart knew that melody. It had played that melody itself that day; it had been there with Harry while he came up with it as well.

She was thrown back to walking along St Austell, spending the day in the sunshine with two people that she had come to care so incredibly much for. Thrown back to standing side by side with Harry, talking about music, walking along the market, eating ice cream, laughing till her sides hurt. A lump suddenly appeared in her throat.

“What the fuc-“

“-Dax,” Harry said, stopping immediately. “No.”

“I’ve heard that word before, Harry,” Grace said.

“What, when?!”

“Harry, that was insane,” Dax said, grinning as he stood up from the sofa again. Before Y/N could be noticed, she stepped away from the doorway and walked outside again, feeling every inch of her chest hurting.

“Y/N!” Jo called. “Come in here!” They stood by the grill with a plate filled with food, waving her over so the two of them could walk in together.

She grinned over at Jo as she made her way over, them walking in the direction of the barn together. She waved at people she recognised – Florence from Bessie’s knitting club and Dax’s mum, was one of them. The inside of the barn was decorated with plenty of fairylights, giving the old interior a yellowish and homely glow resembling candlelight. There were small tables and chairs all around so people could sit down to eat, drink, and chat, while a huge screen was positioned by the furthest wall, two microphones attached to what looked to be a high quality karaoke machine of sorts. Jo showed the way and they sat down with the rest, it didn’t take long for Harry, Dax, and Grace to join them. Y/N got out of her chair and tapped Grace on the shoulder.

“Haven’t gotten a hug yet,” Y/N said and Grace jumped off the ground, throwing her arms around Y/N’s neck. She laughed, hugging the little girl to her for a few heavenly seconds before she stepped away. “You look nice today.”

“Nanay told me not to spill anything on it,” Grace said as she gestured at her pink, sparkly dress. “I told her I can’t promise that.”

Y/N chuckled. “You’re doing well so far, I’d say.”

“Thank you!” Grace beamed. “Anyway, Harry’s drinking that drink that makes his breath smell awful.”

“Gracie,” Harry warned from where he now sat beside Ellie, but the little girl did not appear to want to hear what he had to say.

“How can you kiss someone with bad breath, Y/N?” Grace asked and Y/N’s heart dropped at little as she thought about kissing Harry again. How they weren’t going to kiss again. How she wanted to kiss him, but not because they were fake dating. It took everything in Y/N not to look in Harry’s direction, because, judging by his little utterance of his sister’s name before, she knew he must’ve heard this as well.

“You don’t care if they’ve got bad breath if you really want to kiss them,” Y/N answered, giving Grace a smile.

Grace grimaced. “I would never kiss someone if their breath stank.”

“Don’t talk about kissing, you’re seven,” Harry said, sipping his pint.

Y/N raised her eyebrows at Grace and Grace did the same back. At Grace’s instructions, Y/N sat down in her seat so Grace could sit in her lap. Grace watched the people singing intently, sometimes singing along and nodding her head along to the music like she couldn’t help it. It was impossible not to smile at the sight of it, Y/N simply cared for this little creature so much it was hard for her to fully comprehend it. Grace, though young and Harry’s little sister, was the closest thing Y/N had ever come to a sister. They didn’t have a deep connection through thoughtful conversation, but they just understood and went along. There was an emotional and meaningful connection that, though not talked about, had appeared because they enjoyed and appreciated each other’s company.

Grace ran over to a nearby table to get herself some water, leaving Y/N sitting in the chair alone, her lap feeling oddly cold. On the other side of the table, Amir was talking loudly over the karaoke battle that had just begun.

“When I go back up to London for work in two weeks’ time, I feel like I’m just gonna make a right fool of myself, yeah? Normally takes a week for me to turn my weird off after I’ve been home.”

“Gonna be weird when you and Jo are off again,” Ellie said. “Why do you two have to work in London? Why can’t you just stay in St Ives?”

“Bit liberating to leave this place for another one every once in a while, not gonna lie,” Jo admitted, sipping their beer.

“Makes you realise all you’ve missed,” Fatima nodded. “Was the same when I came home for uni breaks, now I’m just really happy I ended up here. Might be underpaid as a teacher, but-“ Fatima shrugged her shoulders. “-I love living and working here, it’s home, after all.”

Y/N hated that she had never experienced that feeling; of coming back to something you had missed. Of coming home.

“Bum that,” Dax said. “I want my mates home at all times! I don’t care you’ve got a job!”

Y/N chuckled, the conversation around them commencing as she looked down at the table, picking at a stain on the table. Grace came back just then, but she didn’t get to sit down before Dax said her name.

“Wanna go up and sing your heart out?”

Grace squealed and took Harry’s hand. Harry downed the rest of his beer and stood up, walking with Grace, Dax, and Amir up to the karaoke machine. Y/N rested her chin in her hand, smiling as she watched the four of them discuss what song to do. It had to be an easy one that Grace already knew, it might be hard to find the correct one. They took some time to decide, but suddenly, the drums to a song Y/N recognised from Harry’s favourite’s playlist started playing. She remembered how Grace really loved that playlist.

“Uptown girl,” Grace sang into the microphone as she perched on Harry’s hip, sharing microphone’s with him. “She’s been living in her uptown world.”

Dax and Amir joined in as well, singing along with Grace who was still unsure of the lyrics but tried to read them as best she could on the screen in front of them. Harry moved them to the music, Dax throwing an arm around Amir’s shoulders as they started singing their hearts out. It was simply impossible not to smile as you watched the four of them, dancing and singing along to Billy Joel’s song.

“God,” Fatima sighed as she scooched her chair closer to Y/N’s. “I wish someone looked at me the way Harry looks at you.”

Y/N halted a little at Fatima’s words, looking in her direction as Amir, Dax, and Grace sang “And now she’s looking for her downtown man, that’s what I am”.

“Pardon?”

Fatima grinned. “Oh, you know-“ She placed her chin in her head, looking off into the distance with exaggerated doe eyes, a dreamy look on her face. For a split second, Y/N’s heart seemed to lurch out of her chest. Harry… Harry looked at her like that? He glanced at her? Surely, Fatima was not being serious and she had simply caught Harry smiling at Grace when she sat in Y/N’s lap.

Y/N laughed. “You’re taking the mick, that’s not how he looks at me.”

“Wouldn’t know, would you? Always happens when you’re not looking.”

“Harry,” Grace said, not even bothering to hold the microphone away as she spoke to him in the middle of the song. “You need to sing, the song’s for Y/N, remember?”

Y/N glanced beyond Fatima and at the group in front of the screen, a rush of adrenaline streaming through her veins. Laughter could be heard throughout the room at Grace’s words, many turning in Y/N’s direction to look at her, all with smiles and curious looks on their faces. At once, Y/N’s face seemed to be too hot for its own good. She bit her bottom lip, continued to watch the gang, ignoring the heat in her cheeks.

Harry seemed to take a deep breath before he started singing with Amir and Dax, both of them doing a miserable job of doing the song any sort of justice. Neither were impressive singers, but Y/N knew Harry was.

“Uptown girl, you know I can’t afford to buy her pearls,” Harry sang, voice so effortlessly breath-taking that Y/N felt like she was doing a pretty good job of imitating the dreamy look Fatima had demonstrated earlier. “But maybe someday when my ship comes in, she’ll understand what kind of guy I’ve been, and then I’ll win.”

Grace joined in then, wrapping her arm around Harry’s shoulder and leaning her head against his. They all continued to sing along to the song, Y/N not paying any sort of attention to the conversation between Fatima, Ellie, and Jo. She watched as the four of them cheered once they were done singing, bowing to the small applause they got before returning to the table.

“I need to go tell nanay!” Grace shouted, running off outside to Jessa and the rest of the family.

Y/N smiled at Harry as he came back, getting a tight-lipped smile back before he picked up his, Dax’s, Amir’s and Jo’s empty beer cans, walking over to get them all a new round. Grace came back with Halo Halo, placing herself on Y/N’s lap as the two ate, talking non-stop. The little one disappeared after a little while, Y/N suspected it was because it was getting rather late. As the night went on, Y/N realised that the only two that would be able to stand by the end of the night were her and Fatima. The others got very drunk, talking loudly about everything insignificant and nothing they would remember in the morning. Harry kept looking at the watch on his wrist, clearly making sure that they got back to his at a good hour so he could report at 3am. When Harry’s speech got a bit more slurred and his eyes a wee hooded, Y/N started looking out for him. Using the time on her phone, she kept an eye out, making sure that Harry returned to his cottage before then so he could sleep off most of his intoxication.

Talking amongst themselves as the rest chatted loudly, Fatima and Y/N agreed that Fatima would be the one to drive everyone home. It would be easier to drop Harry off last as this was his van, and Fatima didn’t live too far away from the lighthouse, the two then decided Y/N would sleep at her place that night, it would be nice just being the two of them. She loved how closed she was getting to Fatima and Ellie. There hadn’t really been a time before when she had made proper good friends, but everyone around that table were currently climbing very fast and very high up on her list of favourite people in the entire world. She genuinely appreciated Fatima’s help with the UCAT reading earlier that week, it had really helped her along, even though the result hadn’t been the best. That was Y/N’s fault though, not Fatima’s teaching skills.

At one point, Dax got all of them up from the table, bringing them over to the screen, telling them over and over again how they needed to do this. Y/N was unsure if they really did, but she didn’t bother telling a very drunk Dax that as he handed out microphones, telling people to share. Y/N scooted up next to Ellie, watching Harry as he put an arm around Jo’s shoulder, patting them as the two of them along with Amir watched Dax search for the song.

“We need to know what song we’re gonna embarrass ourselves to,” Amir exclaimed as Dax was taking his time typing.

“I’m not about to do a Union J song, mate,” Ellie said.

“Alright, I liked one of their songs ten years ago, Ellie!” Dax looked over his shoulder at her, a deep furrow to his brow. “Carry You is a belter!”

“It’s not.”

“Jo, back me up here,” Dax said, turning back to write something into the laptop standing there.

“Dax… don’t make us sing Union J or The Wanted or JLS or anything like that, we don’t need that,” Jo sighed.

“The fact you’re embarrassed about our boyband period in 2013 hurts.” Dax glared at Jo.

“Right, then, what’s the song we’re singing?” Harry shot in, nodding at the laptop again. “We’re just standing here lookin’ stupid now.”

“Looking stupid?” Amir tutted, shaking his head. “Couldn’t be me, mate. Model material, this is. Look like I’m straight off the runway.” He gestured at his body and Fatima feigned throwing up, making the five drunks howl with laughter.

“Ultraviolet, Stiff Dylans.”

Y/N gasped at Dax’s words, bringing her hand up to her chest as the others around just looked at her, afraid something had happened. She grinned at Dax. “That used to be my favourite song!”

This seemed to be shocking news to absolutely everyone.

“What?” Y/N raised her eyebrows. “Angus, Thongs, and Perfect Snogging was revolutionary.”

“Too right,” Harry said. “But… were you…” He blinked a few times. “Were you even allowed to watch it? Not a film I reckon would’ve been allowed in your house.”

Y/N shrugged her shoulders. “What can I say, I used to be a rebel.”

“Yes, Y/N!” Dax grinned, giving Y/N a high five. “Now, bum God Save the Queen, this is Britain’s national anthem! Someone record this, history in the making!”

The familiar music started up and Y/N was taken back to a time when she had a massive crush on Aaron Taylor-Johnson, hiding her obsession with this film from her parents, and listening to this song on repeat. The whole gang started singing, Amir doing a horrible job of keeping up with everyone else, but it was fun to watch him get annoyed with himself for not getting it right. Involuntarily, Y/N’s eyes fell on Harry. He was singing his heart out, sounding better than everyone else, but in his drunken state he seemed to have forgotten some of the lyrics. However, everyone knew the song and it felt very good to be with people she adored, singing a song all of them knew and loved, together. She felt part of something bigger than herself in that moment.

Maybe that was why she did it. Because, looking back, Y/N did not quite know what came over her in that moment, but she loved herself for it. As the song started nearing the end, Y/N took the microphone out of Ellie’s hands and started singing at the top of her lungs, taking absolutely everyone by surprise but she did not care. Ellie started laughing and the rest joined in again towards the end, matching Y/N’s volume.

As she turned around after the song, grinning from ear to ear as she glanced at her friends, basking in their applause and cheers, she caught Harry’s eye. That crooked smile of his was on his face along with a look she wasn’t sure she had ever really seen before, maybe only once. Amusement tangled up with adoration, forming a sort of emotion that had yet to be given a word; someone on the cusp of surrendering themselves completely to the overpowering concept of love, yet still holding back in fear of the unrequited. As soon as their eyes met, Harry looked away, scratching at the back of his neck as he walked back over to their table, everyone following suit.

The time came for them all to leave and Harry gave Y/N the car keys, claiming that he was not fit to drive, though she had not needed him to tell her that. Y/N gave them over to Fatima and all of them made their way over to the van. The night sky was black, brimming with glinting stars and the moon hanging big and yellow over Cornwall, wishing them all a good night. Y/N walked over to Jessa and thanked her for her hospitality, asking her where lolo and Grace were. She explained they’d gone to bed a long time ago, lolo had probably read Grace a bedtime story and fallen asleep himself, he sometimes did that when he stayed the night at the farm.

Y/N ran over to the van, opening the passenger door to see Amir sitting there, a bag in front of him in case he should throw up on the way home. He gave Y/N a peace sign before she closed the door and opened the door into the backseats.

“There you are,” Jo said through a yawn. “Let’s go, Ima.”

“Y/N!” Harry called from further back in the van, making Dax groan and mumble a “shut up, mate” that Harry did not hear. “Y/N! My flower! Come back here, I saved us the whole back backseat!”

Y/N glanced in Fatima’s direction, only to see her friend raise her eyebrows at her, nodding her head. “He made a big fuss.”

“Y/N, come here, I want to tell you something,” Harry said, words slurring a bit. Y/N stepped into the van properly, closing the door behind her before she walked back to Harry, sitting down in the seat right beside him by the window, even though there were three seats in the far back of the car. The car jolted a little as Fatima started driving, steering the car up the gravel round and towards the centre of St Ives.

“What’d you wanna say?” Y/N asked Harry in a hushed voice, hoping he’d mimic her.

“I… I wanted to say something that’s been on my mind for a while now,” he said, whispering back to her, his face mere centimetres from her own. She felt hot all over, adoring their close proximity but also remembering the rule they had made some days ago. As they drove by the white fluorescent streetlights, Harry’s face lit up for a few seconds, making him appear almost angelic. “I’ve been thinking about it.”

“Okay.”

“It’s got to do with you.”

“Figured as much.”

Harry giggled, looking down at his hands where they rested between his legs, sliding his thumb along his other. “You’re very smart.”

“Thank you.”

“Smartest person I know.”

She couldn’t help but smile at the compliment. “I doubt that.”

He pursed his lips as he thought. “You do that a lot.”

“What?”

“Doubt yourself.” He stared back at her, moving a little closer so their sides were flush against one another. “I think you’re great. I’ve never doubted you.”

They stared at each other for a few seconds, neither knowing what to say as the world around them seemed to disappear completely. For a single moment, it looked like he was going to tilt his head to the side, almost as if he were getting ready to study her like he had done at Porthgwidden. He stopped himself, staring back at his hands.

“I don’t have any cucumber left,” Harry mumbled, this made Y/N giggle a little. “This ain’t gonna end well for me tonight if I don’t get that cucumber.”

Y/N giggled some more, bringing her hand to her mouth as Harry looked at her again, his crooked smile appearing on his face, dimple showing.

“What?”

“Doesn’t sound like you’re talking about a cucumber when you say it like that,” she said.

“What then?”

“Well… what’s kind of shaped like a cucumber?”

Harry furrowed his brows, thinking hard.

“You have it, I don’t.”

“A cock?” Harry mouthed, looking absolutely gobsmacked that Y/N would suggest such a thing, which made Y/N laugh again.

“Yeah, dildo or summat.”

“Y/N Bernadette Angelica McKay,” Harry gasped, shaking his head as his eyes fell on the road through the window beyond Y/N. “Saucy git.”

“You started it.”

“Well, you made it sexual.” Harry crossed his arms, pretending to roll his eyes to make Y/N laugh, which worked effortlessly. “Wouldn’t mind a dildo, not gonna lie.”

“Harry!”

“What?! It’s the truth!”

Y/N laughed again, watching as Ellie and Jo jumped out of the car once Fatima stopped it, waving at everyone before they started walking in the same direction. Fatima started the car over again just as Jo stumbled and almost face planted, making everyone in the van – including the two outside – crack up. Y/N settled into her own seat, looking down at her thighs as they drove off again, giggling a little to herself as she replayed Jo’s near-death experience in her head.

“I…” Harry started, and when she glanced up at him, he was smiling that very small smile back at her. It was barely there, making his dimples show ever so slightly, and it made every single butterfly in Y/N’s tummy flutter their wings madly. “I love the sound of your laughter.”

Y/N felt her heart skip a beat.

“It makes me happy.”

She knew that if she continued to look at Harry and he continued to look at her, she would just start feeling more for him. Though she knew it was inevitable, she would fall in love with him sooner or later, she wanted to slow the process out so that she didn’t end up spending too much time with him while she loved him.

“When you said you watched Angus, Thongs earlier, it kinda shocked me a bit,” Harry admitted, talking as if it was all part of his stream of consciousness. “Not that I think you’re innocent or anything like that, you don’t seem innocent- and when I say it like that it sounds weird.”

Y/N bit her lips together, trying not to laugh.

“From what I’ve heard your parents were very strict so…” Harry shrugged his shoulder, looking away from her again. He tilted his head a little to the side as he caught eye of Amir in the front. “Amir! Oi! If you throw up in my van I’m gonna murder you!”

“Shut up, Haz,” Dax groaned. “Y/N, why the fuck is your boyfriend so loud when he’s plastered? Bloody hell.”

“I’m not loud, I’m passionate.”

“About Amir not throwing up in your car?” Dax rolled his eyes. “Brilliant.”

Fatima stopped the car, shouting at Dax to get out and help Amir home. Dax slowly walked around the car and took Amir’s arm over their shoulder, the two walking off as Amir started singing a song that had been sung right before they left the farm. Fatima sat there and watched the two walk up the street, making sure they got inside Amir’s place where Dax would kip before she started driving towards the lighthouse.

The three were quiet for the last part of the drive, Harry seemingly about to doze off all of a sudden, humming Ultraviolet under his breath as they started driving up the gravel path to the lighthouse. Y/N just barely saw the light of the lighthouse before it disappeared, but did not pay any more notice to it as Harry leaned over her, glancing out the window as if to see his house. Once Fatima stopped the car, Harry reached for the seat buckle, fumbling for it in the dark before he finally got free.

“Help me inside?” he asked Y/N, making her lose her words a bit at first in surprise, but she quickly loosened her own seatbelt as Fatima turned around, about to jump out of the van as well.

“Just gonna help him get to bed, it’ll take five minutes,” Y/N told Fatima as Harry slid the backdoor open, getting out of the car.

“Ten if can force a cuddle out of her,” Harry said, chuckling a little to himself as he watched Y/N get out of the car and close the door behind her. She only raised her eyebrows at him, holding her hand out for his keys, which he gave her eagerly. She wanted nothing more than to cuddle him for ten minutes, she’d take cuddles for one minute if that’s all she got, but she knew he was only saying it in front of Fatima to make her believe them even more. He took his time walking to the front door, as if to drag the time out, while Y/N walked on inside, turning the lights on for him. It took some time for him to get his shoes off and while he did that, Y/N looked through his fridge, not seeing any cucumbers but a few tomatoes could maybe do as post-party food.

Harry put his rucksack with his camera down by the sofa, strolling over to the bathroom to do whatever he needed to do. Y/N put the tomato on the counter, making Harry a glass of water like he had made her last time and putting that along with the tomato on the dining table. Once he walked out of the bathroom, he rubbed at his eyes, giving Y/N a smile as their eyes met.

“Are you staying?”

“No, I… I’m going home with Fatima.”

Harry nodded. “You two…?”

Y/N chuckled some, feeling her cheeks get a little hot as she shook her head. “No, we’re friends. I’m kipping at hers.”

“Okay, good.” Harry nodded, biting the corner of his upper lip as he said, “I don’t like it when you’re alone.”

“Why not?”

“Because of what you said about your dad, that he was a bad man and all that.”

Y/N felt a sort of panic rise in her chest and she looked out the still open door, seeing Fatima sit by the stone fence circling the lighthouse, watching its lights. Harry yawned, lying down in his bed and glancing over at Y/N, his eyes trailing down her body. She felt herself blushing, both because Harry was staring at her like that and she did not want to talk about her dad, especially not while Harry was drunk.

“Can you stay?” His voice was soft, speaking with a meaning that went beyond the cottage and tonight.

“I’m going with Fatima.”

“I want you to stay, flower.”

She wanted to lay down next to him, slide her hand through his hair and watch as he closed his eyes, smiling ever so slightly and humming in total and utter contentment. Fall asleep next to him, feel his breath on her skin again, know that he was there to protect her if anything were to happen. She suddenly remembered how safe she had felt waking up here, how she had never slept as good as she did that single night she spent at Harry’s cottage. Never again would she feel like that, Y/N realised. Once she left St Ives in a couple of weeks, all the safeness and the sense of belonging would be ripped away from her. It would surely be like someone ripping off her arm.

Harry sat up in his bed as if he sensed a shift in the air around them, looking up at Y/N with slight worry but also a sort of desperation, silently asking her to please consider his offer. God, in that very second, it was very hard to resist him. Because when he looked at her like that, so attentive, so devoted to everything she did, she simply wanted to do nothing but lay down next to him and do what he asked. But she couldn’t, and with each passing second where they just looked at one another, the tension between them grew and she felt goosebumps up her back. She cleared her throat some.

“You wanted to tell me something earlier, was that it?” Y/N asked, wanting to get them talking about something else.

“What?”

“In the van, when I entered it, you said you had something to say, what did you have to say?”

“Oh,” Harry said as if suddenly remembering. He glanced away suddenly, scratching at the back of his neck. “No, it was… I wanted to tell you that… I know we haven’t spent much time together since the whole… since Terraland… last Saturday- so like, a week ago…”

She nodded, encouraging him to keep going.

“I’m sorry for that. I don’t… The last thing I’d ever do is hurt your feelings or make you uncomfortable.”

“I know, Harry.”

“I just…” He watched her, taking in every single one of her movements as if he would forget what she looked like when she left. “You and me, you know… we were sitting there together and… you were so pretty when we sat there at Porthgwidden, I couldn’t… I had to kiss you. Spur of the moment kind thing, I suppose.”

Y/N did not want to look at him, did not want to hear him say anything else. Had all the nice things he had said at the beach also been just “spur of the moment” then? So nothing was real? Not that she had thought it was, but that kind of just underlined it, didn’t it? She didn’t know what to think anymore, everything was so blurry, nothing seemed to really make sense. Everything was for the fake relationship, it always was.

“Y/N!” Fatima called from outside, Y/N glanced at her. “Say goodbye so we can leave!”

When she glanced back at Harry, Harry seemed to get a little desperate, not wanting her to leave just yet. But Y/N couldn’t stay.

“Y/N,” Harry said, maybe realising that what he’d said might’ve been a bit much. “I-I didn’t mean it like that.”

She gave him a smile. “We’ll talk soon, yeah?”

Harry just nodded, and she walked out the door and toward Fatima who was smiling at her. With one last glance over her shoulder, she saw Harry in the window over his dining table, looking out after Y/N and Fatima as they walked along the gravel path toward town. His hand was resting by the tomato she had laid there for him, hoping that it could somehow be a good second to his usual cucumber tradition after nights out. Y/N crossed her arms over her chest as a slight cold breeze blew past them and Fatima audibly shivered.

“Yeah, would you look at that,” Fatima said as Y/N glanced her way. “Left me out in the wind, you did. Now I’m freezing.”

Y/N laughed, nudging Fatima’s shoulder with her own. The two friends went on back to Fatima’s place, acting as two old friends would.

Monday, 3 August

This was the first time Y/N had ever witnessed rain in St Ives since she arrived in June. It was not pouring down as one would assume after a long drought, a slight pitter-patter fell onto the grass around her as she walked along the gravel path, falling onto the hood of the yellow rain coat she was wearing. The sky was a dull grey, not something one should be worrying about, but there were a few darker clouds hovering somewhere in the horizon and she was sure that with this high of a temperature and the promise of pouring rain later on, lightning would occur as well.

Once she reached the lightkeeper residence, she knocked three times, waited a minute for Harry to open, then peeked her head in when he didn’t. Harry was sat by the dining table, looking through an instruction manual in front of him, frowning down at the pages as if he was reading a language he did not understand. At the sound of the door opening, he looked in Y/N’s direction, giving her a little smile.

“Saw you approach just now,” he said before looking down at the manual before him again.

“So you didn’t bother opening the door for me?” she asked, smiling over at him, but Harry did not answer. This was what she had been afraid of.

Ever since the karaoke and barbeque night at the farm, Harry had not met her gaze. Whenever she had come over to study, he wouldn’t spend too long in the cottage with her and he would rarely make her tea as he usually did. There was something not subtly cold, but different. He still welcomed her to sit in his windowsill and would still talk to her, but he wouldn’t look at her, wouldn’t stay around for long enough so they could talk properly. Y/N had tried, even suggested they go down to the Bakery to buy a pasty and walk around St Ives, go to the Candy Shoppe, or to the pub to have a few pints, but Harry had turned down all her offers, told her they could do it another time. He never really gave an explanation for why he didn’t want to hang out and Y/N was afraid of asking for one. But they had to talk. She didn’t want to go on like this, especially when Harry had come to mean so much to her.

“What’re you up to, then?” She took her coat and boots off, walking over to where Harry was seated by the dining table.

“I’m about to change the bulbs before it starts getting dark out and the lamp’s turned on,” he explained, furrowing his brows as he ran his finger over the page, concentrating on reading a specific line. Y/N stayed silent as not to disturb anything. He got up from the chair, sipping the last of his tea before he shoved the manual down in the back pocket of his denim shorts. He slipped his red knitted jumper over his Elton John tee shirt, the same one he had given to Y/N to wear after Dax’s birthday party when she slept over for the first time.

“Can I help?” she asked, giving him a smile she hoped he’d lay his eyes on her to see.

And he did, lips parting a little as if he was surprised by the suggestion. This puzzled Y/N as she had always expressed her willingness to help him, no matter what.

“Go on, then.” Harry nodded. “Just needed a cuppa before I started, it’s well past 6 after all.”

“You’re going to bed soon?”

“Yeah, and the lamp gets turned on in about an hour.”

Y/N smiled as he walked past her. “You’ve been procrastinating all day, have you?”

“Not all day.”

She laughed and she thought she saw the flicker of a smile on Harry’s lips at the sound.

“I’ve done other things as well, but I need this done now and quickly.”

Y/N nodded, putting her rain boots back on as Harry got his trainers on, the two then jogging in the direction of the lighthouse as not to get soaked in the rain that was starting to fall harder around them. Harry held the door open for her, then locked it once they were both inside. They started their ascent, Harry leading them past his little office floor, past the bedroom like room, up and up and up, till they finally reached the bell room. Even though Y/N was wearing a short white sundress with her green oversized boxy high-neck jumper along with her mid-calf black rain boots, she walked up the ladder leading to the bell room. She remembered how she had been reluctant to walk up wearing a dress that first time, but now she didn’t really care. Harry needed to change the bulbs and she said she was going to help.

Along the way, Harry had brought a toolbox with him, placing it up on the floor of the bell room before he walked up the ladder, letting Y/N go on up after him. For some reason it shocked Y/N when she came up to see that the lamp – the only thing inside the bell room – was not moving. She had imagined that the light in lighthouses moved around, and though Harry had explained what offshore and shore-based lighthouses were, the pattern of a lighthouse and the like, he hadn’t really explained how the lamp worked.

“It doesn’t rotate,” she said, walking up to the relatively small lamp in the middle of the room.

Harry was rummaging through his toolbox, stopping momentarily as he glanced over his shoulder at Y/N, unsure what she was referring to first, then let his eyes fall to the lens. “It flashes.”

Y/N furrowed her brows, walking around the lens to get a good look at it, studying the ridges and different colours of it, blank and red. “flashes?”

Harry pulled a screwdriver out of the toolbox and started working on the screws around the lamp. “It’s to identify it when it’s dark out, sailors can’t make out the white lighthouse when it’s night-time.”

“Makes sense.”

“Most lighthouses, especially shore-based ones like Clodgy, rhythmically flash or eclipse their lights to provide an identification signal. The particular pattern of flashes or eclipses is known as the character of the light, and the interval at which it repeats itself is called the period.” Harry tipped the plastic lens to reveal the five lightbulbs under it; Y/N was surprised to see it wasn’t made of glass. She supposed it was more convenient. “Essentially, a lighthouse may display a single flash, regularly repeated at perhaps 5-, 10-, or 15- seconds intervals. This is known as a flashing light. Clodgy is one of them.”

“What are these then?” Y/N asked, pointing to the red streaks.

“Basically, if someone is on sea and they are driving in the direction of sharp rocks or land, they’ll see a red light flashing instead of a normal, yellow one.”

“Danger, danger.”

Harry reached into his pocket, pulling out a box and putting it on the little space underneath the lamp.

“How many bulbs are there?” Y/N asked, looking at the different ones all attached to a round object in the middle of the lens.

“Five, they usually don’t have to be changed out. You gotta do so every 15-25 years, depending. This little thing-“ Harry pointed to the small bulb between them. “Lights up 15 miles using these lenses. It’s incredible.”

Y/N looked up at Harry, seeing a tiny and amused smile on his face as he talked. This was the most she had heard him talk in over a week; it made her heart do a silly fluttery thing.

“When one of these five bulbs go out, the apparatus knows that the bulb no longer works and it will rotate and-“ Harry placed his finger on the side of the bulb, rotating it to the right so that the apparatus turned, clicking as another bulb fit into place at the top. “-Click to a new bowl, it’s on automation and all that. So, we rarely change the bulbs.”

She bit her bottom lip as she watched him, not able to help herself. It was just so endearing to watch him like this, so amazing to hear him talking so unfiltered to her again. Right then, talking about bulbs and apparatuses and what not, he was so engulfed, so eager to tell her everything, that he did not care how he sounded. He was comfortable. She could tell.

He must’ve noticed how he rambled off, because he cleared his throat and stood up straight again, running a hand through his hair as a slight pink colour appeared in his cheeks. He quickly started to change the first bulb, putting a new on in its stead. Y/N just watched him, finding the sound of Harry working, the slight clicks, the quiet patter of the rain against the windows surrounding them, very relaxing. He seemed to be relaxed as well, so she thought this might be the best time as any.

Inhaling slowly, she leaned her hands on either side of the slight counter the lamp was standing on. She looked over it at Harry, his bottom lip between his teeth as he put the second bulb in its new place.

“Harry, we…” she started, swallowing thickly. “We need to talk about… things.”

Harry sighed. “Yes. Yes, we do.”

Knowing he felt the same way about that made it easier to breathe for a reason. At least she wasn’t going into this the same way she had been going into the Emilia situation after Dax’s birthday.

He started on the third bulb as he started talking, beating Y/N to it. “I, uhm… I want to tell you about my dad.”

This came as a shock to Y/N who was left raising her eyebrows at him for a second or two before saying, “Yeah, alright.”

He glanced up at her over the lightbulb. “You didn’t see it coming?”

“We’ll talk about your dad first,” Y/N gave him a reassuring smile. “We have time. We’ll always have time.”

“But that’s the thing…” Harry trailed off, switching out the fourth bulb, not meeting her eyes. “We don’t. If there’s one thing we won’t always have, it’s time. There won’t ever be enough time spent with your loved ones, there just won’t. No matter how much time you spend or how much time you spent with someone, you’ll always want more time. Always. What you got is never enough.”

The rain outside fell a little harder against the windows of the bell room, the wind a little harsher.

“Two years ago, my dad went on a fishing trip. He usually did this, took a few of his mates and then set off out wherever. They were never gone for more than a day tops, they always returned at night with tons of fish and I remember how Jessa would be so delighted and then invite our whole family over for barbecues and the like.” He paused as he started on the fifth and last bulb. “One day, September 4th to be exact, he didn’t return. Jessa and I sat up for hours waiting for signs of him. She started calling the spouses of the others on the boat, no one else had returned either.”

Y/N absolutely hated that she knew where this was going but she hadn’t told Harry that yet.

“Dax ended up sleeping at the lightkeeper house with me for a month and some after that, just didn’t want me to be alone, you know? He’s sound like that.” Once he was done putting the bulb in place, he reached for the lens and put it back where it belonged. “I think most of my mates and the people in my family’s life tried to keep our minds off it, ‘cause the more days went by, the more likely it was that… you know… he was dead.”

Harry sighed, reaching for the screwdriver, taking a little pause in talking as he screwed everything back into place. Y/N took a few steps back, watching him do his job and make himself ready to talk again.

“The boat was found October 14th, no one and nothing was in it.” Harry still wouldn’t look at her, put the screwdriver back in the toolbox and kept his back to her for a few seconds before turning around again. The bell room was starting to get relatively dark; she supposed the light would turn on soon, and she could barely make out the slight glassy expression in Harry’s eyes.

“I went absolutely mad. There are big chunks of time that I don’t even remember from that time, my brain has just… erased it from my memory, it was the darkest period of my life. They didn’t find any of the passengers’ bodies, there were three of them as well. It had been a turbulent and stormy night, so a sea storm took them out, drowned them all. But I… I…” Harry inhaled hugely, breathing shakily. “I didn’t… I still kinda don’t want… want to believe it. My dad is laying somewhere, far away from me, far away from Jessa, Gracie, from… from home…” He looked down at the ground, blinking rapidly. “It doesn’t fucking feel real. It’s not supposed to happen. This… He was a good sailor; he didn’t drown at sea.”

Y/N felt something starting to sting behind her eyes, she bit her bottom lip to stop it from wobbling. The storm outside seemed to pick up, sounding rougher than a minute before.

“I took over after him because I thought… I thought that, if no one else could, I could help him find the way home. I could shine that light; I’d take care of the lighthouse till he came back home. I’d show him the way, I’d light up the path for him, and he’d come home to me again. Where he belonged, where he should’ve been all along.” He took a deep breath, slowly looking up again, eyes falling to the lamp in the middle of the room. “It was a way for me to ignore the fact that he was truly dead. He wouldn’t come back. I didn’t really… I didn’t realise how… I didn’t realise how true it was that my dad, my constant, was gone, until Emilia left as well.”

Y/N furrowed her brows, a sort of rage filling her again. She had never been this angry before. There was something burning inside her, a sort of desire to protect Harry from everything evil in the world. No one deserved to hurt, but Harry least of everyone.

“I met Emilia at one of Astronaut Lions’ gigs the year before. I remember standing at the bar and she came up to me, asked me if I was Amos’ son – that’s my dad’s name, by the way - to which I said yes, and she told me her dad used to lend my dad and his mates his fishing boat sometimes. My dad and hers knew each other. So, we got talking, and, I want to say it’s ‘cause our dads knew each other, we got pretty close, pretty fast.”

Talking about Emilia brought Y/N’s gagging reflex into full force, but she composed herself.

“When my dad died, she was around, but not as often as Dax, Amir, Jo, Fatima, Ellie, or my family. She visited and stuff, kept me occupied, but the gang spent a lot of time at my place, occasionally rotating. It was nice, I didn’t want to be alone. I love being alone, but I didn’t want to be alone with my thoughts then.”

Harry leaned against the window, eyes falling to the floor. Y/N continued to stand where she had, watching Harry carefully.

“We had been together for a year and some then. We hadn’t really fought much, I don’t really like confrontation, it makes me very uncomfortable, so I usually just let her say what she wanted to say if she was annoyed with me and didn’t bother arguing. Fatima kept telling me how unfair it was on her and our relationship, and also on myself, that I never really stood up for myself when we fought. It’s, like… I wanted it to work out so much that I wanted to ignore the things that didn’t. I didn’t want to do something that might cause us to break up.” He sighed heavily. “We were good for each other, we did have some good times, and she was my first ever proper girlfriend that broke my heart, but… but these last few weeks I’ve come to realise that she never really wanted what was best for me the way all my mates did.”

Y/N wanted to walk over to him and hug him. She wanted to console him; tell him she was there if he needed anything.

“I don’t spend a lot of time thinking about that part of my life, you know? I’m aware that breaking up with someone ‘cause they’re bad for your mental health is valid, but what she did really affected me. It made the grieving process worse. I had never really felt truly alone till then.” He furrowed his brows some. “I didn’t have dad; I didn’t have Emilia… I knew I had my mates, but… Emilia and dad meant so much to me, losing them both in such a short period of time… broke me.”

Y/N swallowed a lump in her throat, hoping he couldn’t hear how sad his story made her. “Harry, you don’t have to elaborate if it’s hard for you.”

“No, you deserve to know. Emilia’s back, you’re my… my supposed girlfriend and you… I want you to know.”

Y/N nodded, clutching at the hem of her jumper.

“I know it was a naff move on my part when I went with her to get her that cup, I know I should have understood why you were rightfully upset right away, I know I shouldn’t have been too friendly when she came to Terraland…” Trailing off, he balled his hands into fists at his sides. “The reason why I’ve been so reluctant to push her out of my life is… I know it’s fucking mental; I know I sound right mad, yeah? But… I figured that if she could return, then maybe… then maybe dad…” Harry didn’t finish, but he didn’t have to.

Y/N shook her head as the only thing in the bell room that was audible was the sound of the rain and wind outside, sounding eerie and strong against the top of the lighthouse. “It’s not mental. It’s a very valid and normal reaction to grief, clinging onto the last shred you have of someone, hoping that one day they might come back to you.”

Harry looked at her feet, not ready to meet her eyes yet.

“My dad and I have never been close. I used to love being around him when I was little, I remember associating him with goodness and warmth. He would play with me and make me laugh, do things that my mum hated him for.”

“Like?”

“Throw me in the air, let me jump from a bunk bed and onto the mattress on the floor below, that sort of thing.” Y/N almost smiled at the memory. She hadn’t thought about that in ages. “However, as I grew up, my dad just got colder. He was still nice to me, was still protective and a dad, but he wasn’t the same.”

Y/N could tell by the slight breath Harry inhaled that he wanted to ask what changed but stopped himself. She was grateful he did. She could not go that far just yet.

“But… though it’s not the same as you, I respected my dad’s wishes to stay in Winchester and do as my mum; become a stay-at-home mum who didn’t need education or anything like that. He wanted me to marry well and learn how to be a mum; learn how to be safe at home and mostly indoors at all times.” She furrowed her brows some. “I believed him when he told me I wouldn’t be fit to become a dentist.” She paused for a moment. “You know when you’re scared, and you believe every word your parents say to you ‘cause you don’t know what else to do? They’re older, wiser, got more experience, so of course they know better than you, they know the best thing to do in any given situation.”

Harry nodded slightly.

“Before… Before I came to St Ives, I hadn’t really parted from my family at all. It wasn’t really like I had a choice. They were just always there, and I was expected to be there, too. I was terrified when I left; not only didn’t my parents know I was leaving, but I had just disappointed them in every way possible anyway, so I… I couldn’t stay there.” Her eyes fell on the lamp that yet hadn’t turned on.

Harry cleared his throat, eyes still on the lens in the middle of the room. “Your parents don’t know you’re here?”

“They do now.”

“You told them?”

Y/N felt her heart pick up its speed, she swallowed thickly, continuing to avoid Harry’s eyes. “What I’m trying to get at is that I haven’t, and probably won’t, tell them about the UCAT, or the fact that I’m trying to become a dentist. Part of me wishes that I did, but I know the reaction I’m gonna get… And the other part of me… That part is longing for that loving and warm father to return, the one that helped me fly when I was little.” She leaned against the window. “It’s not the same as you by any means, but it’s-“

“-It’s just as valid, Y/N.”

She shook her head some, looking out at the tall waves below. “You ever get the feeling that, no matter what, you won’t really be good enough, and you settle down with that thought? It’s not this hopeless feeling, but rather you’re just… content with that. You’re average so you’ll get average back.”

“You’re not average.”

She looked over at him, and for what seemed like the first time that day, their eyes met.

“Did your parents make you feel that horrible about yourself?”

Y/N crossed her arms. “In what way?”

“That you were average? Not destined for good things? That you didn’t deserve proper happiness?”

“I was satisfied with life in Winchester.”

“Satisfaction and happiness are two vastly different things.”

It seemed like he wanted to take a step forward but stopped himself, taking a deep breath before settling against the window again. Y/N pushed slightly away from the wall, standing closer to the light.

“It’s like the whole thing with me and Emilia again, innit? There were times when I was happy with her, but I think that’s more to do with the fact that I knew she was there. I could always rely on her. But bottom line is that being with her didn’t bring me instant and constant happiness like-“ He stopped himself, as if remembering there were things he wasn’t supposed to say. “She didn’t make me happy like she should’ve. I was satisfied.”

“Isn’t being at peace good? If someone or something brings you peace, isn’t that good?”

Harry shrugged his shoulders some. “There are different kinds, though. Your life and the people in it should be able to make you feel something, you know? Not being excited to see someone or to be somewhere or to do something, it does nothing. You don’t grow if you’re satisfied ‘cause you’re not moving, you’re not evolving.”

“Being happy isn’t a constant, though. You can’t always be happy, sometimes you’re just… not.”

“How boring would life be if you felt the same way, did the same things, saw the same people every single day? How boring would it be without change?”

Y/N felt herself smiling. “You’re a lighthouse keeper, you do the same things every single day.”

“I don’t, though,” he said. “I might be stuck here in St Ives most of the time, but I never do the same thing every single day. And besides…” He trailed off, biting his bottom lip some. “Besides life’s been anything but ordinary lately.”

Y/N glanced at her arms in front of her. “I… I hated change.”

“You don’t anymore?”

“To a degree,” she said. “I’m happy with the decision I made to leave my old life behind, but now… now I don’t really know what to do. I’m going to apply for University, but what if I’m too old? I’m 25, way older than everyone else there will be, and I… I dunno. I feel like I have to figure myself out all over again now that I don’t have my parents around me anymore, it’s like I don’t know who I am. Once this summer is over and I leave St Ives – ‘cause St Ives, you, and everyone here, are genuinely what’s keeping me together right now – I… I dunno how I’m going to survive. Will I have myself when I don’t even know who I am? Is it too late for me to get a fresh start? Who- Who will be there to help guide me in the right direction if I have no one in my life?”

There was no trace of hesitation as Harry said, voice deep and low, “You’ll always have someone.”

“Will I? I feel lost, Harry.” She blinked a few times, hoping to prevent possible tears from falling. “I’m so lost. Where do I even go from here? I don’t and can’t go back to how life used to be, where do I go?”

“Don’t go.”

She glanced up at him, the lamp beside them suddenly coming to life with a massive blink. Though the suddenness of the light had scared her, Harry’s words had been what got her heart racing. The light blinked in the direction of the sea, the other side from where they stood so Y/N couldn’t see it directly, only the dark back that was facing the mainland. However, she could not care less for the light as Harry stared back at her, right into her eyes, for the first time in what seemed like forever. She felt herself relax at the sight of him, but his words still reverberated through her head, making it spin slightly.

“What?”

“Don’t go,” he repeated, stepping away from the window. “Stay.”

Her arms fell to her sides. “You… You want me to stay in St Ives?”

It took a few seconds, as if he was building up the courage to say something he thought was obvious, but, seemingly, not so obvious to Y/N. “Yes.”

“But I…” She trailed off, blinking a few times as if she were trying to regain composure. “You’ve never said.”

“’Cause I’ve always been afraid of your reaction.”

“My… my reaction?”

“If it would scare you.”

“Why would that scare me?”

“’Cause someone telling you they care for you more than… more than they care for anyone else, and you not feeling the same way… I don’t want to scare you.”

Y/N was sure she had not heard him right. And if she had, she must have misinterpreted his statement, because surely he had not just said what she thought he said. The light blinked its usual pattern, lighting up the darkening bell room as the two just stood staring at one another.

“I thought you only felt like that for Emilia.”

Harry frowned, shaking his head as if what he’d just heard was absurd. “Emilia?”

“Well, then… then that you used to feel like that for her, that you two used to be close. I’ve been jealous of that, after all.”

“You’ve been jealous?” Harry’s eyes were wide, intently staring at Y/N as she continued to explain. “How do you mean?”

“Dunno…” Y/N said, knowing that she probably sounded like an absolute plonker. “You’ve always seemed pretty caught up on her. That you still have feelings for her.”

He studied her, mouth falling shut as he let his eyes scan her face, saying a soft, “I don’t.”

“But- But why do you blush when she’s around, then?”

At the mention of him blushing, a red colour appeared in his cheeks and he glanced away for a few seconds, running his hands through his hair. Y/N could not help a small smile on her lips, biting at the corner of her mouth to stop herself from doing so.

“I get flustered, don’t I? It’s not like I can help it,” Harry explained, gesturing at his face as he took a few steps forward. “She’s my ex, it’s weird being around her.”

“You act so shy, though. Isn’t that how you are around people you’re nervous in front of?”

“I acted like that with you as well, did you notice?”

Y/N felt a breath hitch in her throat, something about Harry admitting this made her entire body hot. Part of her did not believe this could be true, it was just too good, while the other urged her to keep going, see what happened next. She shook her head slightly. “I-I dunno.”

“I was so bloody nervous,” Harry said, chuckling a little to himself. “It was genuinely hard for me to form sentences ‘cause I didn’t want to make a right twit of myself, yeah? I just… I wanted to impress you so bad, but it was so hard.”

She pressed her lips together, heart hammering hard, hands feeling clammy with anticipation.

“I’m not nervous around you anymore, though.”

“You’re not?”

“No.” He shook his head. “I feel safe with you now. I don’t care that I make a fool of myself ‘cause you won’t mind.”

She smiled a little. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” He gestured around him with a soft jerk of his chin. “You’re a light room.”

Y/N wanted to ask him what he meant by that, but stopped herself when their eyes met again. She wanted to walk to him, to be near him.

“It’s like…” Harry started, pausing for a few seconds before he went on. “It’s weird being around someone you thought meant a lot to you and you realise they didn’t. But with you… that’s…” He glanced at the ground again, tugging at the hem of his red jumper. “It’s different.”

She continued to just look at him, afraid that if she said anything he would stop.

“It’s… it’s like I… like-“ He cleared his throat, suddenly blushing uncontrollably, and it was as if he knew how ridiculous he must look because he let out a small laugh. “You were the prettiest woman I’d ever seen and I wanted to impress you, I didn’t want to embarrass myself and have you not want to be around me anymore.”

His eyes fell to her feet, moving up over her bare legs, landing on her tummy as he continued to find the words lost somewhere within him. He took a deep breath.

“I’m not good with words, so explaining how much you mean to me is hard, but I know that I… that you…” He drifted off again, meeting her eyes. “You were the person I wanted to be in the arms of at Terraland, when I was all shaken up ‘cause of that ride, not Emilia, no one else but you. And you’re the only person I want to be in the arms of right now, tomorrow, and probably every single day after that. I like it when you hold me, when you’re around. That’s all I know.” His eyes fell to her lips for a second, meeting her eyes as if he remembered that was forbidden territory. She had said as much. “I like it when we touch, everything seems at once much simpler but also so much more important and grander because of you.”

Biting her bottom lip, Y/N walked closer to Harry, and at the sight, he took two more steps closer as well, meeting right beside the lamp that was still occasionally lighting up the bell tower and the entire coast along with it. Standing right there in front of one another, something that could only resemble magic passed between them and circled around them, drawing them closer to one another. They were meant to be close, meant to be right here, with one another. It was wrong to be anywhere else than with Harry. She didn’t feel as lost when he was here; there was a sense of reason, of purpose, when they were together that was so great to the point of invention, there was no other way of explaining it. This, what was between then, was beyond anything. Limitless, unfathomable, immeasurable; infinite.

“I want to touch you,” Y/N said, her voice almost a whisper as she, once again, glanced at his lips.

“Touch me. Please.”

Slowly and gentler than she had ever been before, she placed her hand to his cheek, thumb stroking over the slight stubble before she slid the tips of her fingers to the back of his jaw and then forth again. He closed his eyes, leaning into her.

“Please, touch me,” he repeated, the breath of his pleading words falling against her hot wrist. “Never stop.”

She studied his face, loving the calming effect she had on him because it matched the one he had on her. Though he made her heart race and had her overthinking everything, he calmed her down and made her feel at peace. Exhilarated her and confused her; overwhelmed her and elated her. He made her feel everything all at once, and Y/N thought at last, wasn't that what love really was? When you felt like the feelings inside your body transcended everything, made you see everything around you in a new light? When it changed your world for the better?

Y/N’s hand slid down Harry’s cheek and his neck, and at the change, he opened his eyes to look at her again. She took another step forward, leading him toward her as her eyes fell to his lips, meeting his eyes as they hovered dangerously close to one another. The light blinked on and Y/N pressed her lips against Harry’s. They melted into each other instantly. Harry placed one of his hands to her neck and the other one to her hip, bringing her closer. She breathed against him, the rest of the world around them disappearing completely as they drew out the kiss.

His tongue traced her bottom lip, making a shiver run up her spine. Gently, she slipped her tongue into his mouth, making sure she did not overwhelm him, that it was okay. He instantly complied, stroking his against hers, swirling his around hers sensually, lighting Y/N on fire. She moaned into him, gripping at the hair at the back of his neck as their mouths opened wider, welcoming more of the other to enter and entrance them completely. She ran her other hand over his chest, wrapping it around him, while Harry’s slid down along her back, stopping just before he reached her bum, squeezing her a little as if he wasn’t mentally ready to go down there just yet tonight. The bell room continued to illuminate up, shining its guiding light out across the ocean, helping sailors home and to their final destinations. However, neither Y/N nor Harry could even remember where they really were as they continued to kiss one another. She felt his moan on her tongue, a slight whimper that he had not been able to hold back as they deepened the kiss. They instantly got more frantic; desperate, harder. She pushed against him more forcefully, wanting to taste and feel all of him.

For an instant, and what felt like for the first time since they had known each other, Harry took control. He pressed her against the bar with the lamp, keeping one hand on her neck, thumb at her chin, and the other on her waist. She gasped at the suddenness, her entire body aflame as Harry kissed along her jaw, tilting her head as to get better access. She could not help the contented sigh that left her lips, pushing him even closer to her, wrapping her left leg around his right one as to ensure he did not step away from her.

He whispered her name against her neck, leaving wet kisses along the skin that was exposed and that he could reach without removing the high neck of her jumper. He kissed the tip of her jaw, sucking lightly, and she could not hold back her whimper. It seemed to have had an effect on him that she herself had not anticipated, yet absolutely adored. Between them, pressed against her tummy, she could feel him. It seemed to have startled him as well, maybe not having anticipated it to happen that quickly, but he kissed along her neck again, seemingly not really caring anymore. He wanted her to know just how much power she held over him. He came back to her face, lips hovering above hers. They panted against one another, not letting each other go as the rain outside picked up, thunder rumbling in the distance, and the light that Y/N was pressed up again kept lighting up the ocean ahead.

“I, uhm…” Harry stared down, swallowing thickly. “I’m sorry ‘bout… that.”

Y/N smiled, shaking her head slightly. “Don’t apologise for that.” She brought her leg further up, twining it more around him to bring him closer. As if it was instinctual, Harry reached for her thigh, helping her bring it up to his waist. She let out another sigh, loving how he drew closer to her in the process of yanking her leg up higher. Their eyes met again, and she leaned her forehead against his.

“I thought we agreed on a ‘no kissing rule’,” Harry mumbled, lips brushing against hers as he spoke. “I thought you didn’t want to kiss me.”

“I want to kiss you; I just don’t want it to be part of our fake relationship.”

“This has nothing to do with that.” He moved to kiss her again and spoke against her lips. “I need to ask you, though, before anything more happens.”

She watched him, the sight of him slightly blurry but she did not care.

“There’s… There’s a bed… downstairs if you'd be interested in… you know…”

She smiled.

“In what?”

Harry smiled, giggling a little as he leaned his forehead against hers again. “I don’t want there to be mixed signals, so I’m just… I’m just gonna fucking say it.”

“Say it.”

He gripped her knee tighter. “Do you want to have sex with me? ‘Cause I… I mean, it’s not the sexiest way to go about it, just asking like that, but I… it’s very obvious that I would like- very much like to… you know, if you’d like. I don’t want to-“

She chuckled and Harry stopped talking, smiling at her. “I think asking is very sexy. Mixed signals aren’t sexy.”

“You’re right.”

She leaned in, pressing a light kiss to his lips.

“Flower,” he mumbled, voice rasping ever so slightly, making heat instantly pool between her thighs. “Would you let me make you feel good?”

“Do you think you can?”

Harry met her eyes, a crooked smile coming to his lips. “I’ve had no complaints before.”

“No complaints from Emilia?”

A slight furrow appeared between his brows before it lifted, his smile came back and it got wider. “You really were jealous of her.”

“She got to be close to you.”

“Well,” Harry said, eyes fluttering to her lips. “You’re close to me now. You’re closer to me than anyone’s ever been before.”

Y/N squeezed him closer, biting her lip before she said, “Yes.”

“You… you want to go downstairs?”

“Yes.”

Harry’s smile grew so wide it was hard for him to fight just how giddy he was getting at her words. He stepped away from her, taking her hand in his. They left the blinking bell room, climbing down the ladder, Harry securing the hatch before he turned to face Y/N again. Once they were in the near darkness of that room, they kissed again, desperate to feel one another again. This happened almost on every single floor – pressing each other up against a wall, needy to feel, to taste, to be close – as they could simply not help themselves.

Once they reached the floor, Y/N instantly recognised the door and where they were headed. On her first trip to the lighthouse, she had seen a bed in that room, the door had been half open, but Harry had closed it on their way down. Now, Harry opened it for her, letting her inside. It was tiny. A twin bed stood at the far end, its white sheets made neatly over it, while the desk – which stood perched right under a small window that was being attacked by harsh rain - was filled with photographs of Harry’s family. Him, Amos, Jessa, and Grace. There was a dresser with a vase on top, a bouquet of dead flowers in it that it seemed Harry had forgotten completely about.

Harry closed the door behind them. “This used to be my dad’s room. When it was stormy, he’d stay in here. The door sometimes opens on its own, logically I know it’s just a draught, but…” He shrugged his shoulders and Y/N knew what he meant.

Instead of focusing on that – because they could talk about this in the morning – Y/N said, “Kiss me.”

Harry wasted no time. He marched over to her, pressing his lips hard against hers as he started walking her backwards toward the bed. He let her lay down first, taking her rain boots off before she wiggled up to the top, watching as Harry crawled his way up to her, hovering his lips over hers as to tempt her. She tried to lean up to kiss him since he was taking too long, but he moved further away.

“Twat.”

He chuckled, grinning down at her. “How long do you think you can stand not kissing me?”

She brought her hand up to his neck, bringing him down towards her lips. They kissed again – finally. She felt Harry smile against her lips.

“Needy.”

“You were taking too long.”

“You just can’t get enough of me, can you?”

She wanted to roll her eyes at him, but he was correct. She wrapped her legs around him, bringing his core down onto hers. Harry groaned into her; his erecting cock pressed against her heat. He melted into her instantly, burying his hands in her hair.

“Neither can you,” she whispered back, making Harry let out a breathy chuckle.

“I also just want to make it clear,” he said against her lips. “If anything I do is not working, doesn’t do anything for you, doesn’t feel good, or if you want to try something new, a new position or anything like that, tell me, yeah?”

She smiled, nodding her head as they kept kissing. “Yeah. Same goes for you.”

“Do you have a favourite position?”

Y/N froze a little, thinking to herself and blushing when Harry looked down at her.

“What?” he asked.

“I’ve… only ever really done two.”

“Two… positions?”

“Yeah.”

“That’s fine, did you enjoy them?”

“Yeah, I did. Sex was never really been about enjoyment as much as it was about closeness.”

Harry furrowed his brows. “You should enjoy sex, Y/N.”

“I know, I know. I just… I used to set fire to myself to keep others warm. I realised that was not what I should be doing, which is why I ended up in St Ives. With you. Here.”

Harry leaned down again, pressing a lingering and deep kiss to her lips. “You will enjoy yourself and feel real fucking good tonight, yeah? We’ll find something that works for both of us.”

She smiled. “Time will tell.”

“What do you mean?”

“If I’ll feel real fucking good.”

Harry halted a little as he heard that word slip from her lips. He had never heard it before. She felt the effect it had on him against her. “I’ll show you, flower.”

He reached down to the hem of her jumper and the two got it off her, throwing it to the floor before they started kissing again. She wrapped her legs around him again, resting her heels at the top of his bum, urging him closer to her. Slowly and deliberately, Harry grinded against her, revealing them both of a small fraction of pleasure, increasing the anticipation that was building in the air around them. Hard against her most delicate spot. She felt a desperate need to reach for him, to feel him right there, as ready for her as she was for him, but she liked this much better. Feeling him moan against her, the slow waves of his hips as he stroked his growing erection against the heat between her legs that was aching. His promise lingered in the back of her head, making her nipples perk at the thought. You will enjoy yourself and feel real fucking good tonight.

Harry’s hand slipped down the front of her white summer dress, lingering over her breast where he felt her already hard nipple. He squeezed her breast, bringing what he could of the nipple between his index and middle finger, squeezing lightly as he started kissing down her jaw. An uncontrollable moan left her mouth as he kissed her neck, chest, between her covered breasts. She felt hot all over as he kissed his way down, leaving no spot untouched by his swollen lips. He reached her thighs, kissing up her right one, leaving wet spots that got cold in the crisp air of the lightkeeper room.

“Turn over,” he said, sitting up on his knees to make the process easier for her.

She did as he told her to without hesitation. Again, he leaned over her, nose nuzzling her hair as he kissed her exposed shoulder. Each one of the kisses he trailed down her shoulder place, and back felt like a declaration of love; felt like a promise of forever, of safe keeping. Right in that moment, she realised she had never felt more appreciated or more turned on. She felt so seen, so important, as Harry kept kissing her back, sucking on her skin, humming moans of absolute delight into her that made goosebumps appear all over her. He reached for the zipper of her dress, kissing her shoulder before he whispered, “Okay if I undress you?”

“Please.”

Harry unzipped her dress, leaving a lingering kiss to her shoulder as he shoved both the straps off her shoulders. She took them off, letting the dress hang loosely over her breasts. Just because she felt like it, she lifted her arse off the bed, pressing it against Harry’s hard-on. It took him off guard and he gasped a little into her ear, but quickly took a grip around her waist. He pressed down hard on her, parting her bumcheeks as his protruding cock could now be seen, and felt, outside his denim shorts.

“Fuck,” he breathed as he grinded against her. His hands slipped down further, hovering over her centre, laying a slight pressure on her over her dress and knickers that was exactly what Y/N needed right then.

“Harry,” she whimpered, feeling him moan at her utterance.

“Dreamed about you saying my name like that,” he mumbled, kissing her shoulder again. “Sound even fucking better than I could’ve imagined.”

He placed more pressure on her, making her gasp and throw her head back slightly, leaning it against Harry’s beside her. They grinded against one another, absolutely lost in this seductive dance that they would have no problem doing forever. Panting a little, Harry kissed her shoulder again, knowing that they could not go on like that, no matter how much they wanted, because he would surely not be able to handle much of it before finishing. The heat between Y/N’s legs was excruciating, she could barely take it as Harry pulled her dress completely off her, exposing her naked back to him.

“On your knees.”

She did as he demanded, getting on her knees in the bed as Harry positioned himself right behind her. He ran his hands over her wet knickers, wanting to properly feel all of her now that he finally had her there. It sent a lightening up her spine, making her moan as he reached her bud, flicking it slowly. He kissed the outside of her knickers before he ran his tongue over her, the hot wetness of him on her made her gasp, sweet torture that she both welcomed and hated. Hooking his fingers under the hem of her knickers, he slid them over her bum and down her legs, and. Again, she felt cold as her wet skin was exposed to the chill room they were in, Harry’s ragged breaths didn’t exactly make it better. She whimpered slightly as she felt his breath go from cold to hot, she could feel the heat of his body radiating against her cunt and bum. With help of her hands, she raised, looking over her shoulder at him to see him there, only his eyes visible as he hovered in front of her.

“You’re so fucking beautiful, Y/N,” he whispered, planting a kiss to her bum before he went back to the place she had just been. “I’ll make you come, flower.”

“Actions speak louder than words,” she said, panting slightly in anticipation.

Harry smiled at her, she thought she saw a slight wink before he hovered back over her centre. She was about to tell him to just get on with it when she felt his tongue, hot and wet and hard, between her folds. She gasped again, closing her eyes at the impact. He licked up between her folds first, making sure to taste every last bit of her as he had thought about this for so long. He started off with a light pressure on her clit, licking around it, sometimes over it, driving Y/N absolutely insane. He slowly built up the pressure, making sure he did not overwhelm her, staying focused on the clit the entire time. He wrapped his lips around it, sucking lightly, something that made Y/N throw her head back, letting go of a loud moan that had Harry humming into her.

“Yes,” she gasped, fists buried in the white sheets under her.

He let go of her bud, licking up around the clit again, then over it, flicking it quickly while tipping his head to the side. She bit her bottom lip, looking over her shoulder at Harry as he continued to eat her out, eyes closed as if he was eating the feast of his life. Once again, he wrapped his lips around her clit, sucking lightly at first and building his pressure. Whimpering and panting, Y/N kept looking at Harry, the sight of him behind her like that, doing everything in his power to make her feel good – and succeeding – was so bloody hot.

When she had made her way up here today in the rain, she had never in her wildest dream this was where she would end up. On all fours, Harry seated behind her, eating her out. She had thrown away any hope of him even feeling a smudge of what she felt for him, but tonight, up in the light room, everything changed. Everything they said, and how they opened up to one another. She felt quite literally euphoric; static with adoration and completely engrossed in everything he did.

Harry moved up, slipping his tongue inside her hole, hands sliding down her thighs as he penetrated her. She swallowed thickly, biting at her bottom lip before she met his eyes.

“Doesn’t do anything.”

“Hm?” He moved up, eyes wide as he licked around his lips. “My tongue in you?”

“Yeah. Feels like you’re mushing mash into me.”

Harry laughed, resting his forehead against her bum as he shook, she chuckled as well.

“Don’t hold back,” he said.

“Sorry.”

“No, I’m glad you told me, flower.”

“Also,” she said as he started licking her again, she gasped slightly. “Can we switch? I want to watch you properly.”

Harry blinked slowly, smiling at her as he emerged. “Gladly.”

She turned around, placing herself on her back, Harry stopped to take her in, eyes gliding over her naked body in front of him. He cupped her face in his hands, kissing her deeply as he ran his hands over her tits, squeezing them just hard enough before he lowered them and himself. He positioned himself exactly where he’d been, spreading her legs wider for him.

He sucked on her clit again, this time pushing a finger into her. She instantly moaned loudly, burying her hands in his hair. Harry wrapped an arm around her thigh, holding her in place as he continued to lick at her clit, curving his finger ever so slightly as to make her feel the best she possibly could. She squirmed under him, her orgasm coming on much faster in this position than the last, streaming down her legs, her torso, towards the centre between her thighs where Harry was sucking at her most sensitive spot, pounding his finger into her. She tugged at his hair as she could feel it coming on closer.

“Harry,” she moaned and at once he reached up outside her thigh, cupping her breast in his large hand.

He ran a thumb over her nipples as he flicked at her clit, finger still buried inside her, watching as she started moving and panting and whimpering more and more. He moved his finger faster and sucked her bud, which was exactly what Y/N needed, she cried out, moving her hips with Harry’s fingers. He squeezed her breast, and she met his eyes, seeing his dark green eyes under his long lashes, drinking in the sight of her. He suddenly hit a spot that had fires erupt in her lower tummy. Y/N gasped and let out another loud moan, whimpering under Harry as he licked and fucked her through her orgasm. She did not take her eyes off him and he did not look away from her, ordering her to keep watching till she was completely down from her euphoria.

Y/N was sprawled out panting, smiling as Harry came up to hover above her. She took a grip of his neck, kissing him deeply. He tasted of her.

“I’ll go get a condom in the cottage,” he mumbled. “I-If that’s alright with you, of course. We don’t have-“

“-I want to.”

“Alright. Brilliant.” He stumbled as he got up from the bed in a hurry. “I’ll-I’ll be right back, yeah? Don’t move! I’ll-“ He looked over his shoulder as he stood in the open doorway, a huge sigh leaving his lips as his eyes wandered over her naked body. He shook his head slightly, letting out a chuckle of disbelief. “Fuckin’ hell,” he mumbled before running down the stairs and out of the lighthouse.

It did not take long for him to come back, condom in hand and panting as if he’d been sprinting back and forth. He closed the door again, placing the condom on the corner of the desk beside the bed, crawling back over her again.

“Been away from this for too long,” he mumbled, running a hand over her curves. “And your tits are bloody fantastic, by the way.”

She laughed at him, swatting his shoulder as he reached for the hem of his jumper and tee shirt, bringing both over the top of his head and throwing them to the floor.

“I’d been looking forward to doing that,” Y/N said.

“What, undress me?”

“Yes.”

His eyes seemed to darken a bit. “Take off the rest.”

And she did. Keeping eye contact, she reached for the front of his denim shorts, undoing the button and unzipping him. His Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed, the slight pressure and caress of her fingers against his anticipating and hard prick seemed to do more to him than she thought it would. She hooked her finger around the band of his shorts and boxers, wiggling them down his hips till they were far enough down for him to do the rest. One hand supporting his weight, he used the other one to help her take his clothes off, but her eyes fell to his cock immediately.

It wasn’t like she had thought of it before. Yes, she might’ve had some dreams and daydreams involving Harry and her doing some very filthy things, but she hadn’t really let herself think about his prick. But there it was, and she felt absolutely giddy with anticipation now. She wanted to have proper sex with him; she wanted it so, so bad.

Harry reached for the condom, tearing it open and putting it on, hand sliding down his shaft and to the pubic hair at the very bottom. Seeing the slight trail from his navel and down to it made her mouth water.

“You alright?” Harry asked, that crooked smile on his lips making Y/N’s cheeks heat up. She was already flustered all over, she did not need him looking at her like that. He knew she had been looking and now he was taking the piss. As usual.

“How do you want me?” he asked, voice husky.

She bit her bottom lip, cocking her head to the side. “I dunno.”

He groaned, hovering closer to her lips. She felt him against her sensitive spot, making her gasp. “What can I have?”

She tugged at the hair at the nape of his neck. “I want to be on top.”

That crooked smile came forth again, his dimples deepening. “Yes, ma’am.”

Taking a grip of her waist, he rolled around, making her lay on top of him. His head was on the pillow, right where hers had just been, so Y/N sat up. She took a grip of him, making Harry’s lips part at the impact. He gripped her thighs that were straddling either side of his hips, squeezing her lightly as encouragement. She sat up, bringing him to her, sliding him over the wetness he had caused. He let out a shaky breath, looking to be just as nervous as Y/N felt. She slid down onto him slowly, Harry’s eyes fluttered shut.

“Fuck,” he hissed, and Y/N gasped again.

“Harry,” she said, a little breathless already. “I’ve… I’ve never been on top before.”

He smiled. “That’s fine, here-“ He placed his hands on her hips, urging her to move. She followed his lead, biting her bottom lip hard as her clit rubbed against his pelvic area. “That’s it.”

She continued to grind against him, moving her hips as he was instructing her. Placing her hands on his chest for support, she started moving a little hard, with a little more purpose, Harry’s hands on her thighs a grounding and intense pressure.

“Keep doing that,” he encouraged, letting a moan slip from between his swollen lips. She rolled her hips, loving the filthy sounds they made as the rain kept on crashing against the window. They continued to look into each other’s eyes, not daring to look away as if it would bring them back to reality. Because this was too good to be true. Never before in her life had Y/N felt like this. She felt powerful as she rode Harry, felt a sort of strength in her that had never been present before. It had never been like this with Dominic; it had never been this intense. He hadn’t demanded she order him around, hadn’t been willing or suggested to try new things, hadn’t really done it like this. Harry looked at her as if the world revolved around her alone. As if the centre of the solar system was right here, and he was watching the sun about to eclipse, watching one of the most beautiful and magnificent moments in time. He gripped into her with feverish hands, coming with suggestions every once in a while, always letting her know just how good she was making him feel.

“That’s right,” he moaned as she moved her hips in circles. “Right there. Don’t stop.”

That might just have been the sexiest thing she had ever heard along with his moans. She continued doing exactly what she was doing, feeling her entire body heating up as she could sense her second orgasm that evening. Thinking about it, she wasn’t sure she had ever come twice in one night before. Maybe it was Harry, maybe it was the moment, maybe it was the fact that her and Harry were finally letting their guard down, admitting that there was something else between them besides their fake relationship. People who fake dated each other did not kiss like that, they did not have sex, they did not look at each other like it was all they wanted to do for the rest of their lives. No, this was more than what they had let on. Way more.

Harry sat up, making Y/N fall against his chest as he bent his knees ever so slightly. He placed one hand on her bum and the other on the mattress behind him as to help him move more swiftly. With each stroke over him, Harry thrusted back into her, rubbing at her bud each time and making everything around her seem much more colourful.

“Like that do you?” Harry asked, mouth parted as he panted into her wet lips.

She nodded her head, taking a grip of his shoulders to better move her hips. They moved together, looking into each other’s eyes as the rest of the world disappeared completely around them. The rain, the thunder, the buzzing of the light from upstairs turning on and turning off, it was all tuned out. Harry leaned down, placing one of his hands on her left breast to kneed it seductively. He kissed from her collarbone and down to her breast, sucking and nibbling lightly on her skin as he made his way to her nipple. Sucking it lightly, he looked up at Y/N who was squeezing his shoulders, telling him to keep going. Electricity shot from her tits and down her spine, heating up the fire that was building in her core. He closed his eyes as he sucked and kissed her tits, humming into her and making her moan time and time again. It felt so fucking good. Though she moved a little awkwardly, though they made some sounds together that made both of them laugh and heat up, though they were still trying to figure out what the other liked, this was still the best either had ever had.

As he was closing in on his finish, Harry wrapped both arms around her, bringing her closer to him. They kissed, desperate pleads and whimpers left each of their mouths as everything started setting on fire. Harry moved his hips with her, she tried to continue to move hers along with him, her hips shaking a little with the effort. Harry’s lips parted completely all of a sudden, a furrow appearing between his brows, and she felt it. He twitched against her and she continued to grind her hips, moving him through his orgasm. Looking deep into her eyes, he seemed to completely melt away when she kissed his bottom lip, sighing against him as she herself started getting closer to her second orgasm as well.

“I’ll help you,” Harry said. “I’ll use my hand, if you want?”

“Yes, please.”

He removed his cock from inside her, meeting her eyes as his thumb circled her clit again. Y/N gasped, gripping both sides of Harry’s neck. His lips parted at the pressure, grinning up at her. He brought his other hand forward, slipping his index and ring finger into her while his other thumb continued to flick at her clit. At once she moaned, looking into his eyes as this brought her closer to her climax, fast. She moved with his hand, moaning louder and louder as the fire inside her tummy intensified, feeling even greater than the time before. Harry curled his finger just as he leaned down, sucking on her nipple again, looking up at her through hooded eyes.

Everything exploded and she threw her head back, unable to stop herself. The sound of Harry pounding into her at a fast speed, wet and filthy, echoed through the room with her exclamation of euphoria. Harry continued till she was completely done, watching her as she closed her eyes, breathing heavily above him. Gently, he removed his fingers from inside her, bringing them up to his mouth to lick them clean just as she opened her eyes again.

Y/N felt at peace. Her heart was still thundering away inside her chest, her soul was still intermingled with Harry’s, and they would not let go of one another. They didn’t need that lamp, they didn’t need a lighthouse, they could light up everything on their own. She was sure that at some point tonight, while their bodies grinded together and worked toward climax, they had lit up like the sun. What was going on between them, the cellular reaction, the emotional connection, the physical attraction, it all equated to something. It had to. What this was, was greater than either of them individually. This would forever be marked on their souls. Meeting Harry, spending this summer with him, it had shaped her into a brand-new person. That was, Y/N reminded herself, what love was all about after all. Change for the better.

Harry got a cloth not long after, helping clean Y/N up before they both slipped under the duvet in the lightkeeper room, squished together as the bed was way smaller than what they were used to. Harry ran his hand from Y/N’s cheek and up to her shoulder, his eyes following his hand’s movement.

“I fucking worship you, Y/N,” Harry mumbled, the rain still pouring outside. He caressed his fingers gently over her jawline.

She moved closer to him, wrapping her arms around him. They both closed their eyes and Y/N felt sleep coming closer. She felt so incredibly content, cuddled up to Harry and with the storm raging outside. A couple a seconds away from falling asleep, Harry started whispering against her forehead.

“Play fair with my heart, yeah?” It seemed like he thought she was asleep. That it was safe to say this. “’Cause I’m gonna fall in love with you. You don’t have to love me back, but I’m telling you now, ‘cause it’s inevitable, at one point, I’ll love you. Madly, truly, completely. Just… please… break my heart gently.”

Before she was able to form any sort of reply, she fell asleep.

A/N: If you wonder what the melody Harry wrote for that day spent in St Austell with Y/N and Gracie sounds like, I imagine it goes something like this 🥰

NEXT UPDATE: Sunday, 25 October, 9PM GMT!

FIC PAGE | COME TALK !!!

A HUGE thank you to my amazing and beautiful beta readers! 🌊 @aileenacoustic​​​ 🌊 @bopbopstyles​​​ 🌊 @fromyourstrulyh​​​ 🌊 @harrys-shrooms 🌊 @honeydearly​ 🌊 @summerfeelng 🌊 @watermelonsuger​​​​ 🌊  @withallthelove-a​​​​ 🌊

#harry styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles x you #harry styles x reader #harry styles smut #harry styles fluff #harry styles angst #harry styles fic #1dff #:DDDD PLS DO COME CHAT ONCE YOU'RE DONE READING MWWAH :DDDD

[jamaisjoons]

intro: her XI ⤑ knj | m

⟶ 𝑠𝑢𝑚𝑚𝑎𝑟𝑦:〝 you enter namjoon’s life in the most unexpected of ways, but will you be able to stay, especially when he comes with three adorable but chaotic children, even more chaotic best friends and a bitch of an ex-wife? not to mention your own emotional baggage. 〞singe dad au.

❥ 𝑝𝑎𝑖𝑟𝑖𝑛𝑔: single dad!namjoon x marine vet!reader

❥ 𝑔𝑒𝑛𝑟𝑒: angst ⋆ fluff

❥ 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑑 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑡: 6k

⟶ 𝑤𝑎𝑟𝑛𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠: it starts of super fucking fluffy, like - fluff galore, there’s a naked bath scene but like nothing sexual happens, just lots of soft kisses and touches,,, but they are naked so,,,, also it gets a lil sad/angsty towards the end, reader broods about her past toxic relationship, mentions of cheating/infidelity, then it gets sappy and fluffy again because joon is a gentle giant bear and i love him thank u for coming to this solar talk

➵ 𝑎/𝑛: guess what’s back, back again. intro: her’s back, tell a FRIEND,,,, yeeHAW it’s a new chapter of the lONG, L O N G awaited intro: her. I’m so damn sorry it took so long, idk what got into me but i was missing my babies and my man so i hAD to return to it like asap

⏤ thank you to miss ellie aka @hobisbeautifulass​ so betaing this for me ! sorry it took me so long to add this omg

⇥ Previous || Masterlist || Next

Sitting on Namjoon’s sofa, you’re surrounded by the boys as you play an intense game of Mario Kart. Rap Mon is currently curled on the floor, his tail flicking lazily as he watches the screen. Jungkook’s small body - as usual - lies on your dog, using Monie as his person pillow. Not that your dog minds really - especially with the way he’s got his head perched on Jungkook’s small knee. Jimin sits against his father’s lap, watching as Namjoon helplessly tries to steer Toadette’s pram around the circuit.  Taehyung, on the other hand, is seated on your lap, and you hold the wheel close to your body - allowing the little boy to press the button.

Usually, Jungkook would be glued to you; and for the most part, he still is. However, when Namjoon asked who he wanted to play with, Jungkook had shaken his head - his hair flopping with the action - and declared to his father, in a very proud voice, that he could do it himself. You’d wanted to believe him at first, but the shiftiness in his eyes had confused you. Until you’d started playing - and then, you’d found out that Namjoon was damn awful at the game. Of course, you’d offered to play with Jungkook yourself, with his wildly competitive streak, he’d also refused you - to Namjoon’s utter surprise.

Thus, you’d ended up the way you had: with Jimin and Namjoon, you and Taehyung and Jungkook by himself. Keeping your attention focused on the screen, you stick your tongue out in concentration. Of course, when Jungkook had requested you play Mario Kart, you’d been over the moon. You absolutely adored the Mario games, and Mario Kart was something you’d played frequently during University - whenever you needed to relax from the crushing workload of training to become a vet.

“Alright, Tigger, now,” you whisper to Taehyung. King Boo - your character - aligns right behind Namjoon, and as soon as you do, Taehyung presses the B button, firing off the green shell you’d been storing.

“What the- HEY! Why would you do that?” Namjoon shouts, turning and staring at you in disbelief. A mischievous smile painted on your lip, Taehyung bouncing in your lap happily, you shrug at your boyfriend. Namjoon growls, his lip pulling into a slight pout as he ducks his head to the side. Grumbling under his breath, “I was already a lap behind anyway,” he mutters. Suppressing the cackle at the back of your throat, you simply blow him a kiss before turning your attention back to the screen.

From the corner of your eye, you see Jungkook sit up straight - his little shoulders tense as he leans forward slightly. The two of you are neck and neck - Jungkook just a little behind you. Loosening your grip on the wheel slightly, you let yourself swerve to the side just before the finish line - allowing Jungkook to overtake you - consequently taking first place. Throwing the controller down, Jungkook stands up on his little legs and begins jumping around.

“I did it! I did it! I came first,” Jungkook starts yelling as he bounces in victory. His excitement instantly has Monie on his feet, your dog’s tail wagging happily as he runs around Jungkook’s small body in circles. Jungkook turns to you and runs up to the sofa. Placing his hands on the edge, he jumps up and down while looking at you, his face a picture-perfect expression of elation. “Noona! Noona did you see? Did you see? I came first!” Jungkook says.

Face softening, you nod happily, causing him to beam. At this moment, it doesn’t matter that you’d purposely thrown every circuit of the cup, it doesn’t matter that you’d spent half your time making sure the computer-controlled characters didn’t overtake him, and it definitely doesn’t matter that you’ve come second. No, because right now, all that matters is that Jungkook is happy - and you simply don’t have the heart to tell him you purposely let him win - nor would you ever.

Instead, biting your lip, you reach out and ruffle his hair, “well done, baby. I knew you could do it!” you tell him. Jungkook grins brightly at your praise, his entire body vibrating with cheerfulness.

“It’s okay, daddy,” Jimin’s sweet voice carries out. Jungkook immediately stops celebrating, both your attention turning to him. Once again, you bite your lip, trying to stop yourself from cooing at the scene. Jimin’s currently standing on the couch, his face incredibly close to Namjoon. Squeezing his father’s cheeks between his small palms, squishing your boyfriend’s face together and causing his lips to puff out, Jimin sweetly comforts Namjoon. “I don’t mind losing! You did your best daddy,” Jimin continued.

This time, you can’t help the way your face softens, a quiet ‘aww’ falling from your lips. Namjoon’s arms wind around Jimin’s small body before he pulls his son into his embrace. Burying his face into Jimin’s soft belly, Namjoon blows a raspberry - previous upset at losing the game already forgotten. Jimin’s squealing giggles fill the air, the jubilant sound echoing through the living room. Seeing his twin, Taehyung leaps out of your lap and throws himself towards his father, not wanting to be left out.

Instantly, Jungkook’s eyes light up and seizing the opportunity, he climbs into your lap. Making himself comfortable between your crossed legs, you and Jungkook watch as Namjoon gently wrestles his sons - their childish titters weaving together as he begins tickling them. Finally, both boys squirming vigorously, Namjoon relents. However, instead of letting them go, he whispers into their eyes - muttering so low under his breath you can’t make out what he’s saying, though the impish glint in his eyes doesn’t bode well for you; neither does the mischievous twinkle in the twins’ eyes.

“Now!” Namjoon says. The abrupt sound startles you, causing you to jerk. The only thing keeping you from falling off the sofa is your instinct to keep Jungkook from getting hurt - you know that if you fall, so does he.

However, in the second you catch yourself from falling off of the sofa, Jimin and Taehyung attack you. The two boys jump onto you, their bodies bouncing on the sofa as they begin tickling you. Your eyes widen when you feel their fingers wiggle over your body, raucous, childish giggles filling the air and mixing with your own. Usually, you’d struggle violently - but with the smaller boys around you, you’re conscious of hurting them - and thus, you subconsciously subdue your squirming body. However, that only gives them more room to continue their assault. Not wanting to be left out, Jungkook grins and joins his brothers, Namjoon laughing from the other side of the sofa.

“Joon! Oh my god, Joonie, please,” you whine, heaving for air through your laughter. Your boyfriend’s eyes soften, and taking pity on you, gathers his sons in one sweep of his arms. With the three finally off of you, you gasp for air in an attempt to catch your breath. “I hate you,” you mumble, tilting your head to Namjoon and sending him a mock glare.

Namjoon lets go of his sons, his face falling dramatically as he clutches his heart. “Oh, my love, you wound me,” he gasps theatrically before turning and flopping onto your lap. He looks up at you, his gentle umber eyes swimming with nothing but tender love. A soft smile curls on your face and you gently trace his features: over his strong eyebrows and along the delicate slope of his nose. You tap his nose twice with the tip of your pointer finger before you cup his face. Then, bending at the waist, you press a soft kiss against his lips.

Your boyfriend smiles against your mouth, before reciprocating as he tenderly returns your soft kiss. A chorus of ‘gross’ resounds through the air, the boys flopping on their father as their noses scrunch identically at the display of affection. The two of you laugh softly, your breaths fanning each other’s face - but neither of you moves. Eyes twinkling with contentment, and Namjoon’s mirroring yours, you both brush your noses together - your mouths caressing each other in a series of butterfly kisses.

Lost in the moment, neither of you notice when Seokjin, Yoongi and Hoseok enter the living room; nor do you notice the triumphal smiles on their face. Silently, they watch the five of you. Taehyung and Jimin catch their attention first, both boys briskly crawling off the sofa before running up to the three of them. Jungkook, noticing his brothers are gone, looks around - only to find them in Hoseok and Yoongi’s arms. Briefly, he turns to you and Namjoon, rolling his eyes when he realises the two of you aren’t going to separate anytime soon. Sliding off the sofa, he waddles over to Seokjin before gesturing for the older man to pick him up.

Meanwhile, practically oblivious to your surroundings, you and Namjoon stare into each other’s guys, whispering soft nothings while you continue lavishing each other in gentle tenderness. Eventually, growing sick of the display, Seokjin clears his throat. Instantly, the two of you stiffen, Namjoon sitting up slightly as you both stare at the newcomers with wide eyes.

An impish twinkle in his eyes, and a playful lop-sided smile curled on his face, “well, isn’t this adorably domestic,” Seokjin teases. Groaning, your head falls back onto the sofa, Namjoon rolling his eyes at the slight taunting lilt to Seokjin's voice.

"Don't," comes his only reply. Hoseok's eyes wander over your figure, his eyebrow quirking at your state of dress.

"When was the last time you went home?" he asks. Biting your lip, your gaze down at yourself, your face flushing with heat. Dressed in a pair of Namjoon's boxers, an oversized t-shirt with your university logo on it, and fuzzy socks; you know you're the epitome of comfy. Hell, your face is thrown up into a messy bun, strands of hair falling out of it and framing your face in an unkempt way.

Face intensely heated, "I went home two days ago," you mumble under your breath. Twin scoffs of disbelief echo, causing you to scowl at Seokjin and Hoseok.

"And when was the last time you actually stayed home?" Seokjin asks. That immediately causes you to shut up, your jaw clamping tight as you purse your lips. "Yeah, that's what I thought," Seokjin snorts. Turning to Taehyung, the boy happily sitting in Yoongi's arms, Seokjin directs his attention to him before asking, "When was the last time noona stayed home?"

"I don't know," Taehyung replies with a casual shrug of his shoulders.

"I went home two days ago, oh my god!" you reply, your voice taking a defensive tone. Yoongi snorts, causing you to despair - even he didn't believe you. Grumbling under your breath, you throw your hands up in the air in exasperation, "Okay fine! I don't remember the last time I stayed at home - and I only really go back to get more clothes. But even then, I have enough here that I could just do laundry," you ramble, a pout forming on your lip as you look away. Eyebrows shooting into their hairline, the three simply blink at you, taking in your words.

"How do you get to work?" Yoongi asks, causing you to shrink behind Namjoon. Sensing your embarrassment, he tilts his head from his place on your lap and presses a kiss against your kneecap in comfort.

"Did you not see her car in the driveway? She drives to work," Namjoon rolls his eyes.

"Damn, why don't you just move in?" Hoseok taunts - his tone is light, and meant in a joking manner - but both you and Namjoon startle for a minute, looking at each other in surprise. Shyly, you smile at him before ducking your head down. As much as you love him, and as much as you've grown used to being around him and essentially moving into his house - it was still too soon to be thinking about that. Seokjin opens his mouth to say something, but in an instant, Yoongi cuts him off.

"Anyway, do you have time? We didn't come over to tease you," he says. Nodding at his oldest friends, Namjoon finally gets up from your lap before gesturing to the empty seats. Shifting closer to Namjoon, you sink into his side, Namjoon loosely resting his hand in your lap. Instinctively, your fingers lace between his, neither of you even thinking about the gesture.

Putting the boys down onto the carpet, you watch as they begin playing with each other. It always surprised you how easily they were able to read the room - as much attention as they craved, they always knew when to settle down and leave the adults alone. You turn your attention to Seokjin, Hoseok and Yoongi, your eyes skimming their faces for any clue about what they're going to talk about. However, Yoongi's face is a picture of stoicism, Seokjin's easy gaze giving away nothing - though, Hoseok winks playfully at you. His light gesture has you relaxing, the tension in your shoulders deflating as you sink further into Namjoon's side. At least you know it's nothing serious.

"So, what's up?" Namjoon asks, his voice calm.

"We've booked a world tour. You, Yoongi and Hoseok," Seokjin says, taking charge of the meeting. Your eyes widen, excitement bubbling in your veins. A tour! It's been about two years since they've toured - you couldn't wait to see them on stage. You hadn't been able to go the last time - they'd toured while you were amidst your final year exams. However, this year, nothing would stop you from supporting your boyfriend and friends.

Unable to contain your excitement, you bounce in your seat. Namjoon turns to you, quirking his eyebrows. A burst of adrenaline rushes through you, and before you can even think about it, you're kissing Namjoon on the corner of his lips. Your boyfriend looks at you in stunned surprise before a lazy smirk crawls onto his face.

"Someone's excited," Hoseok laughs, causing you to turn and stick your tongue out at him.

"Of course I'm excited - it's going to be amazing! It's been so long since any of you have been on tour- and I couldn't go last time. But I will go this time - even if it means I have to wake up at the asscrack of dawn to buy tickets," you reply, nodding your head in determination. For most of it, Namjoon looks at you in happiness - though, he can't help the twinge of sadness in his heart.

Eyes softening, he regards you tenderly: with your bouncing legs, bright smile and animated chatter, you are a picture-perfect sight of joy and elation. He should be happy - and the majority of him is: he's got a loving, supportive girlfriend, three wonderful children and he's at the peak of his career. However, right now, all he can think about is how good it's been between the two of you; how easy you've both fallen into a routine: waking up together, getting the boys ready for school before going to work, then coming home and spending time together only to head to bed together. He's grown comfortable in domesticated bliss - and he can't help but wonder what it'd be like on tour; being so far apart, unable to touch each other or be near each other - like you are now.

"Joon?" you ask. His eyes come back into focus, your visage becoming clearer. He smiles gently at you, shaking his head at the soft worry evident in your eyes. "What's wrong?" you ask, squeezing his hand in comfort. Namjoon returns your squeeze, basking in the comfort you so effortlessly offer.

"I'm just worried I guess. It's been a while - and last time it was easy because I could take the boys with me. Everyone was with me. But-"

Namjoon begins. He doesn't need to finish his train of thought, because you're finishing it for him, "but this time I'll still be here in Seoul," you supply. Namjoon nods, his usually warm eyes dulling with melancholia. You shake your head, the loose wisps of your hair following the movement, "it's okay. This is your job- your dream before you met me. I'll still be here for you when you come home- and maybe, I could come to see you one day," you offer.

Taking comfort in your words, Namjoon lifts your hand to his mouth before pressing a soft kiss to the back of your palm. His heart clenches at your words - even now, when he's about to leave for months, you don't resent him for it. Instead, you simply step aside, offering nothing but warmth and support. "You're right. And you don't need to wake up at the asscrack of dawn to buy tickets. I'll give you as many as you want- for whatever dates you want," Namjoon replies. Eyes widening, you look at him in shock - stunned by his offer.

"Are you serious?" you gape, your jaw completely slacked. Namjoon chuckles, turning back to his friends.

"Yup! We can do that, right?" Namjoon asks. The three of them snort in response.

"You literally just ignored our presence for a good five minutes - why should we help you?" Yoongi questions, his eyes are passive and cool - but you notice the light twitch to the corners of his lips. Relaxing, you let out a breath of relief. At least he wasn't really angry. Though, you can't help the heat of embarrassment that flashes through you briefly - really the two of you need to stop doing that.

A small wave of guilt washing through you, "I'm sorry," you apologise with a slight now. Seokjin and Hoseok sigh dramatically at your gesture.

"See, now how are we supposed to stay fake-mad when you do that?" Hoseok sighs theatrically.

Seokjin nods beside him sagely, "yeah, we'll give you all the tickets you want," he says in mock pensiveness. Eyes rolling at their dramatics, you ignore them - more than used to them by now - and instead, turn to Namjoon. Once again, you drop an impromptu kiss onto his lips.

"See, it'll be fine!" you reassure Namjoon. Biting his lips, and feeling a lot more sure of himself, Namjoon returns your kiss. From the carpet, you both hear Jungkook sigh loudly - causing you to laugh.

That night, once Seokjin, Hoseok and Yoongi leave, you find yourself in the twins' rooms reading them a bedtime story while Namjoon tidies up. Jimin and Taehyung are in their respective beds, snuggled underneath their covers as they listen to you. Laying on the large beanbag in their room, Jungkook curls into your side, his head resting on your shoulder. Softly, your voice carries out into the still air of the bedroom - you're currently reading one of their favourite fairytales, 'Swan Lake', as they slowly drift to sleep. Your low, mellifluous voice comes to a close as you near the end of the book. Once you're done, you gently shut the book.

Your eyes sweep over the dimly lit room; their bedside lamps and the star projector Namjoon had installed being your only source of light. Bright stars flit over their features, the projector light spinning lethargically and adding to the sleeping ambience of their room. For most of it, their eyes are mainly shut - both the twins' eyelids fluttering as they slip in and out of sleep. Gently, you manoeuvre Jungkook's head off your shoulder so that you can finish tucking the twins into bed. Jungkook whines at the loss of your body, a small pout forming on his face as he squints his eyes blearily at you.

Getting up from the beanbag, you gently pad over to Jimin's bed. Fluffing his pillow slightly, you tuck his blanket under his body before pressing a tender kiss to his forehead. As you move to his twin, Jimin smiles sleepily at you, one eye peeking to watch you repeat your actions with his twin. When you're done, he watches you walk back to Jungkook - carefully lifting the boy into your arms. Jungkook's body is mainly limp, sleep weighing his muscles down. However, that doesn't deter you for one moment - and after a brief struggle - he curls easily into your arms, his head finding the comfortable spot in the crook where your neck meets your shoulders.

As you bend down to switch off the bedside lamp, Jimin calls out to you, "noona?" Humming softly, you turn your attention to him, shifting Jungkook in your arms. "Do you love daddy?" Jimin asks, his voice low and quiet. Your eyes widen at the unexpected question and you blink owlishly at the small boy. Unsure of what to say, or how to answer, you ponder Jimin's question for a few moments - silence falling over the room. Eventually, you decide on the truth.

"Yeah, puppy. I love your daddy a lot," you admit quietly. It's the first time you've said it out loud - and it doesn't matter if it's just to the six-year-old boy - the weight of your words are still heavy - nothing but the truth in them. Jimin smiles and with a nod, he snuggles back into bed.

"But you love us more, right noona?" Jungkook mumbles as he looks at you with a small pout.

Laughing softly, you nod. "Yeah, but don't tell daddy that," you whisper - your tone conspiratorial. You hear Taehyung exhale loudly through his nose, and turn to him, your eyebrow quirking. You'd thought he was already asleep - but clearly, you were wrong. He's looking at you hesitantly, a silent question in his eyes.

"What's wrong, Tigger?" you coax gently. Taehyung brightens up at the use of the nickname, causing you to smile tenderly. Frequently, Namjoon would refer to Taehyung as tiger, and one day, when Taehyung was singing along and bouncing to 'The Wonderful Thing About Tiggers', you called him Tigger: considering he bounced around, was incredibly sweet, and a cuddler to boot. Suffice to say the least, Taehyung had loved your nickname - it was his favourite character in Winnie the Pooh after all - and ever since then, it had just stuck.

Nervously, "are you our mommy now?" Taehyung breathes out. If you'd thought Jimin's question had come out of the blue, Taehyung's one completely throws you for a loop. Unsure of what to say, you stand between their beds - all three of their gazes fixated on you as they expectantly await your answer.

Eventually, you take a deep breath, and gathering all your courage, "that's up to you and Namjoon," you reply. As soon as you say that, the three of them nod - apparently accepting your answer. Taehyung curls further into his sheets, Jimin nuzzling his head against his pillow.

"You should be our mommy... I like your hugs... and you smell nice," Jimin mumbles, his voice heavily laden with sleep. Taehyung makes a soft noise, agreeing with Jimin's sentiment. However, that's all they say - because then, they're both drifting off to sleep.

Overwhelmed with emotion, you wrap your arms tighter around Jungkook and carry him to his own bedroom. Already dressed in his pyjamas, and on the brink of sleep, all you have to do is tuck Jungkook into bed. A feat that would be easy - if Jungkook wasn't desperately clinging to your neck. When you unwrap his arms from his neck, Jungkook whines but acquiesces - letting you place him on the bed. Sitting on the mattress, you begin tucking his sheets under his sides before brushing his hair out of his forehead.

"Noona?" Jungkook asks sleepily - and this time you freeze. A twinge of fear courses through you - is he going to ask you something you're unprepared to answer again?

"What is it, baby?" you ask, swallowing thickly. Jungkook turns to his side, looking at you with his large doe eyes.

"I didn't want you to be my mommy at first," Jungkook breathes out - causing you to freeze - however before you can panic, "because I wanted you to be my girlfriend," he continues. Instantly, relief floods through you, causing you to let out a soft, breathy laugh. Jungkook ignores you, looking at you with nothing but sincerity in his eyes - and you find your breath hitching in your throat. Immediately you know, that you're completely unprepared for whatever he's going to say next.

"But I want you to be my mommy - if it means you'll stay with daddy, Jimin, Taehyung and me forever," Jungkook finishes. The moment he finishes his sentence, your heart grips, tears filling your eyes.

Taking a deep breath, you try to suppress your overwhelming emotions - not wanting to cry in front of Jungkook. Instead, "I'd love to be your mommy - and stay with you all forever," you choke out, your voice straining as your throat constricts.

"Then you should stay - and be our mommy," Jungkook says. His words are simple - as if the answer was there all along - and to Jungkook's four-year-old mind it is simple.

You swallow thickly - gulping audibly. "Yeah, maybe I should," comes your only response.

An hour later, you find yourself submerged in the bath. Light sniffles escape your nose as you wipe the tears from your eyes. Really, you can't help but laugh at yourself. Just a few months ago, you were ready to run for the hills over this level of commitment - and now, here you are, crying in your bath over their sweet words. Never would you have imagined such touching words from them. Of course, they didn't really understand the gravity of their words, and their toddler-like minds couldn't really comprehend forever - yet, they'd still asked you, oh so sweetly, to be in their lives forever. So easily, with only a shred of hesitation - they'd bravely asked you to be their mother, to love and care for them like a mother would - to be with their father. It's the last one that has you emotionally devastated - you have their approval.

You've been with Namjoon for months now - but part of you always worried whether the boys only accepted you because you were intertwined heavily in their lives - or maybe they'd just grown comfortable with you. But today proved that they wanted you in their lives - enough that they trusted you to nurture and love them as a mother would - as their mother should have. Choking down another sob, you submerge yourself further in the bath - letting the water envelope you in its warmth.

"Love?" Namjoon's voice breaks through the silence. Sitting up, you turn your head - only to come face to face with your boyfriend. Concern shines in his warm brown eyes, Namjoon looking at you in a mixture of tenderness and worry. His eyes trail over your slightly puffy eyes and swollen face, a frown marring his face at the clear signs of what he thinks is distress. "What's wrong, Angel?" he asks, his voice incredibly soft and gentle. Shaking your head, you sink further into the bath, your throat constricting.

Guilt gnaws at your belly - you don't deserve his concern, and you certainly don't deserve his sons' trust - not when you'd almost walked out on them. Of course, that stemmed more from your fear of commitment than them. You were just afraid to be hurt again. Afraid to let someone in and have them utterly break the trust you put in them. Maybe Dojae was right - maybe you do ruin your own relationships. As soon as the voice of your ex echoes in your head, you shake it off. No - he's wrong. No matter what he said - you didn't ruin your relationship. He did. You had loved him - and were willing to give up almost everything for him. Everything except your dream to become a vet. Something he hadn't appreciated very much.

Sometimes, you wonder why you stayed with him for as long as you did. Though, you figure it was youthful stupidity. Dojae had been your boyfriend since high school and things were fine during then. But all that changed in university. The two of you had always loved science and biology - and though you'd always wanted to be a veterinarian, he'd somehow convinced you to apply for medical school - just so you could be with him; and in your foolish youth, convinced you were in love with him - you'd agreed. But that first year had been completely miserable - and you'd never hated anything more. Nonetheless, you'd put up with it for an entire year. Until you couldn't anymore.

After your first year, you'd transferred to veterinarian school. It was still fairly close to Dojae's medical school - but you could no longer spend as much time together. And then, things had changed. You'd given him everything - your first kiss, your first relationship, your first time. Hell, you even gave him one miserable year of medical school - just to make him happy. But it hadn't been enough. No, despite how much you loved him, how much you were willing to put up with for him, it just hadn't been enough. And he'd gone looking for more with someone else - in someone else's bed.

You'd seen the signs at first - when he'd come to you smelling like a different perfume, or when the settings for his passenger seat had changed - even though they'd been adjusted specifically for you. You'd seen it when he'd message you hours later, and when he did it was only about when you'd be able to come over because he missed you - and by that he meant in his bed. However, each time, he'd made an excuse and not wanting to believe it, you'd believed them. You'd believed him when he said the perfume was from his lab partner, or that he'd dropped a friend off and that's why the settings were changed. You believed it when he said he messaged late because he was busy studying - or that he just missed you so much he had to have you. But they'd all been lies.

Lie after lie, he'd fed you his deceitful excuses - and like an idiot you'd believed them all. But that doesn't mean it's your fault. No - it's not. You gave him everything - and all he did was take, take and take - and demand more. You were simply trying to finish your degree - it's not your fault you couldn't drop everything just to give his cock some attention - and it's definitely not your fault that he started fucking your roommate just because you were busy studying for your numerous tests and exams. No matter how much he tried to blame it on you; no matter how much he tried to say you're the one who pushed him away. It's not your fault.

"Angel? Where are you right now?" Namjoon asks gently. Drawn out of your bitter reverie, you blink in surprise when you feel him behind you, his lips gently caressing your naked shoulder. Somehow, while you'd been lost in your own world, Namjoon has stripped and gotten into the bath with you. Not only that, but you'd been so deep in your thoughts, you hadn't even noticed that Namjoon had shifted your position. Now, you find yourself laying against his hard chest, the soft of his belly pressed against your lower back as his thick thighs cage in your body.

When you fall against his back, your shoulders noticeably deflating, Namjoon frowns. "Angel?" he prods, nudging you lightly with his nose.

You take in a deep breath, "I was thinking about Dojae," you mutter under your breath. Namjoon stills behind you, a frown marring his face. Then, he wraps his strong arms around you, pulling you flush against his chest. Head lolling behind, you rest it on his collarbone and take in a deep breath: drinking in his scent of sandalwood and vanilla.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asks gently. His voice is soothing, not a single ounce of judgement in them, and you know that if you did want to talk about it, Namjoon would simply listen. But you don't want to talk about it - a sentiment you express to him. Humming softly, "do you want to tell me why you're thinking about him?" he asks.

Biting your lip, "they asked me to be their mother," you whisper. You feel him stiffen behind you, his shoulders tensing below your head as he grows quiet. The two of you stew in silence, Namjoon waiting for you to elaborate while you gnaw on your lower lip. Eventually, you take another deep breath, "I wasn't expecting it - and they asked so sweetly - but I feel so guilty because I almost left - and they didn't deserve that. But then I thought about why I left and..." you blurt out, your words rushing out one after another.

The air thickens with trepidation, and you feel Namjoon suck in a sharp breath, "do you... do you want to leave again? Is that why?" he asks - a mixture of hesitation and fear evident in his voice. Face crumpling, you quickly shake your head, sinking further into his embrace. Feeling your head move, Namjoon relaxes - the uneasy tension dissipating.

"I don't want to leave. I... would it be so wrong of me to say I want to be there for them? That I want to be their mother - that I desperately want to be with them and you for the rest of my life? That I hate Dojae - and I wish I never met him? That I wish I met you instead - that I wish I met you earlier?" you ask, your voice low and full of uncertainty.

"No," comes Namjoon's immediate answer. Twisting in his arms in the slightly, you finally turn your head to look at him, your eyebrows furrowed as you frown. "It's not wrong for you to say that. Sometimes... sometimes I wonder what life would be like if I never met Jihee - if I'd met you earlier; if you were my children's mother. I imagine it all the time too, wonder all the time," Namjoon confesses. Your heart clinches in your heart - the distance in his eyes all too familiar, as well as the slight tinge of pain in his eyes as he thinks about his ex. However, as soon as it comes, it fades away and Namjoon inclines his head down to you, a soft smile on his lips. "But none of that matters. Because we found each other anyway, and we're here now," Namjoon finishes. He moves his hand, entwining your fingers together. Then, bringing it up to his lips, he presses tender kisses to each of your fingertips.

"You're right, we're here now," you echo, your voice just above a whisper. Namjoon smiles brighter before he bends and places a gentle kiss to your temple. After that, the two of you sit in silence, simply basking in each other's presence. Lazily, Namjoon's fingers dance along your skin, lightly tracing circles over your kneecap as you sit in the bath.

Eventually, you break the silence once again, "forever sounds nice," you chuckle lightly - trying to lighten the mood. Namjoon's own soft laugh fills the quiet bathroom, and immediately he's dropping his head to pepper kisses along the length of your shoulder.

a/n: owo did we ENJOY IT HUH? i hope so ᵘʷᵘ because i KNOW I DID IM SO FUCKING SOFT I MISSED HIM I MISSED BY BOYS I MISSED DAD JOON WAH WHY DID I STOP WRITING THIS WTF

Kofi | Masterlist

#ficswithluv #hyunglinenetwork #kwritersworldnet #bangtanarmynet #btsguild #thekimlinenet #btsbookclub #btswriterscollective #btswritingcafe #moonchildnetwork #magicshopnet #bangtanhq #namjoon x reader #namjoon fluff #namjoon angst #namjoon smut #kim namjoon x reader #namjoon fic #bts au #bts fic

[raindancer2004]

Blended Family

Word Count: 4,400 Demetri x OC - Part Two Warnings: Fluff, Angst, mention of sexual assault of OC.

Nico was a one-week-old when he said his first word “Daddy” Demetri froze for a moment not sure he heard right, his son was only a week old “Daddy” The soft voice repeated and Demetri looked down at his son and lifted him out of the crib and held him to his chest “That’s right little one, I’m your Daddy” He replied softly smiling and his son snuggled into him, his small hand holding onto Demetri’s top. Demetri had never thought about being dad once he was turned, but now that he has a son, he wouldn’t have it any other way ‘I may not have a mate to share eternity with but I’ll always have my son’ He smiled at the thought and made his way to his bed and got comfortable as his son began to fall asleep laying on his chest.

Demetri takes Nico to meet the Queens and they fall in love with him instantly “Oh my god he’s adorable” Sulpicia beamed as soon as Demetri entered the room with Nico. Athenodora took Nico from Demetri “Hello little one, you look just like your daddy” “Thank you” Nico replied, his cheeks turning a little pink “Aww and he has your manners” Sulpicia smiled at Demetri, who smiled back beaming with pride “You are going to bring such joy to us all little one” Athenodora added hugging him a little tighter and he snuggled into her “Nico likes a cuddle mi’ lady” Demetri says looking at Athenodora “I’ve noticed and that’s ok with me” She replied “Don’t hog the little one, sister” Sulpicia said holding her arms out to Athenodora, who handed Nico over to her and watched as he cuddled into her sister. Demetri watched as the Queens took Nico over to the sofa and take a seat knowing he wasn’t getting his son back anytime soon “Come take a seat Demetri” Athenodora offers pointing to the armchair beside the sofa “Thank you mi’ lady” He replies as he takes a seat getting comfortable, he was going to be there a while.

Nico surprised Demetri when he got up and walked at only four weeks old “Fascinating little thing aren’t you?” Demetri chuckled and his son chuckled too as his little arms reached up “Up please” Demetri smiled and lifted his son into his arms “I’m so proud of you son, talking and walking within a month” Nico nodded and smiled before yawning and snuggling into Demetri before falling asleep in his arms, something both of them enjoyed.

Demetri had taken Nico into the castle’s south facing garden and noticed that Nico’s hardened skin glowed faintly rather than sparkled in sunlight, therefore he would be able to blend in with humans more easily than vampires, something Demetri liked as it meant that Gianna could take his son out to the courtyard in front of the castle on sunny days when he couldn’t, although he would in the castle near the doors just in case, ensuring his son was safe.

It was a Saturday afternoon and Demetri decided to take his son to a nearby park as he wanted to get out of the castle for a bit and Nico likes the park; luckily for him it was an overcast day, so he didn’t have to worry about exposure. They were approaching the park when Demetri noticed two familiar scents ‘apple and cinnamon’ and ‘lemon and honey’ and before he knew what he was doing he was walking towards the scents; only to discover his son had beaten him to it and was standing by the bench looking at the baby in the dark-haired girl’s arms “Hello, I’m Nico. It’s nice to meet you” He introduced himself, smiling and looking at the two of them “I’m Sophie and this is Ellie. It’s nice to meet you too” “She’s really pretty” Nico said looking down at Ellie who cooed at him “Thank you Nico. Is your mommy around?” She asked softly, looking around “No, I don’t have a mommy. I’m here with my daddy” He replied turning and pointing at Demetri “Hello again Sophie” Demetri smiled as he approached them, recognising them from the plane “Hello Demetri. I’ve just met your son” She replied smiling “He’s very polite” “Thank you” He replied “Do you mind if I sit here?” He asked gesturing to the empty space beside her “Not at all” She replied “How have you been?” He asked “I’ve been ok thank you, still trying to settle into our new home. How have you been?” “I’ve been ok too, I er…I gained a son since I last saw you” He replied “I did wonder about Nico as I remember you saying you weren’t sure about holding babies and I took that to mean that you didn’t have children of your own” She said “It’s definitely a new thing but I wouldn’t change having him in my life for anything” He replied with a smile “How old is Ellie?” Nico asked “She’s four months tomorrow” Sophie replied and Demetri watched Nico’s reaction and chuckled as his son seemed intrigued by her “Would you like to hold her Nico?” Sophie asked “I’m not sure how to…I wouldn’t want to hurt her” He replied low not looking away from Ellie. Demetri lifted Nico onto the bench so he was sitting between him and Sophie “Just make sure you support her head and you’ll be fine” Demetri said and nodded at Sophie, who gently placed Ellie in Nico’s arms; Demetri wrapping his arm around his son to help support Ellie’s head “You’re so tiny” Nico said to Ellie and she cooed back at him as he smiled down at her.

About an hour later Sophie noticed it had gotten colder “I should get going, it’s getting a bit too cold for her” Sophie said nodding down at Ellie “We’ll walk you home” Demetri smiled “There’s no need” “I know but I want to and it’s the least I can do as my son ‘stole’ your daughter for the afternoon” He replied and Nico looked up at him and smiled “She’s so pretty daddy and I think she likes me” “I think she does too, she doesn’t usually smile that much at people she doesn’t know” Sophie answered. The four of them walked back to Sophie’s apartment and Demetri couldn’t help feeling uneasy at the thought of leaving them there…alone. “Sophie, may I use your bathroom please?” Nico asked politely “Of course you can. Come on in” She replied opening the door “Here let me” Demetri said and leaned down to get Ellie out of her pram “Thank you. Come on Nico I’ll show you where the bathroom is” Sophie said and Nico slipped his small hand inside Sophie’s and followed her. When she returned to the living room she saw Demetri sitting on the sofa with Ellie in his arms and he was singing the Greek lullaby to her softly “Daddy sings that to me at night too” Nico said as he came to stand by Sophie. Sophie smiled at the sight, Demetri looked up and smiled at her “She woke a little when I picked her up and I remembered this worked the last time I held her” He said softly not wanting to wake her “Like I said you’re a natural” Sophie smiled at him “I’m putting the kettle on would you like a tea or coffee?” “Coffee please” He answered with a smile, pleased she wanted him to stay a little longer “Would you like some juice Nico?” Nico nodded “Yes please Sophie.” Nico smiled when she handed him a small cup of juice “Thank you Sophie.” “Thank you” Demetri smiled at her too as he took his coffee from her “You’re both welcome” She replied.

Demetri and Nico arrived back the castle later that evening after having dinner at Sophie’s at her request “You’ve been at the park for quite some time” Felix said as he entered Demetri’s room “We met up with Daddy’s friend Sophie and her daughter Ellie” Nico answered before his Dad could, Felix smirked at his friend “When do I get to meet your ‘friend’?” “Not anytime soon” Demetri replied “What is she like?” Felix asked “She’s gorgeous Fe, inside and out, she’s funny, caring and seems to get on with Nico” Demetri replied “Ellie’s pretty and so tiny” Nico added smiling, Felix raised an eyebrow “It would seem Nico found a new friend too” “It’s not like that Fe, she’s four months old and if I get to claim Sophie as mine, Nico and Ellie will be raised as siblings.” “You have been at the park all this time…with Sophie?” Felix asked “No, after about an hour we left the park as it was getting too cold for Ellie; we walked them back to their place and went inside, had a drink and Sophie insisted cooking us dinner” Demetri answered “It was yummy Felix” Nico informed him “Really? What did you have?” “Sophie made lasagne with garlic bread, followed by chocolate brownies for dessert” Nico replied “Although I don’t think Daddy enjoyed it as much as Sophie and I” Nico added with a chuckle “I haven’t eaten human food in over 1000 years and the taste is not pleasant” Demetri said looking at Nico “I know, but you may want to work on your expressions a little Daddy or you’ll hurt Sophie’s feelings” Nico responded and Demetri nodded “That’s you told then” Felix chuckled ”Get bent” Demetri replied turning his back to his friend. “Come on Nico bath time” Nico ran into the bathroom and Demetri followed and begun running a bath with the Johnson’s baby bubble bath, Demetri likes how it smells so he continued to use it regularly. Once Demetri finished bathing Nico, he dressed him in clean pyjamas and they made their way to Demetri’s bed and got under the duvet, getting comfortable, before Demetri reads him a bedtime story. Soon enough Nico is sleeping peacefully, his breathing and heartbeat slowing down, the sound was quite relaxing to Demetri.

The following weekend Demetri and Nico met Sophie and Ellie in the park “Hello Sophie” Demetri smiled at her before looking down at a sleeping Ellie in her arms “Hello Demetri, Nico. It’s nice to see you both again” She replied “Likewise.” “Hello Sophie” Nico replied smiling at her, looking down at Ellie, Nico whispered “Hello Ellie.” Sophie looked at Nico and then Demetri and then back to Nico “He-he’s grown since last week” Sophie said low, but Demetri heard her and smiled, a little nervous “Don’t all children have a little growth spurt?” Demetri asked “Yes, but it seems a little more than that” She replied but didn’t push any further on the subject as Demetri and Nico sat beside her on the bench. Sophie handed Ellie to Nico and Demetri wrapped his arm around him to help support Ellie’s head again. Demetri and Sophie spoke about what their week was like since they last saw each other. Nico joined in the conversation too, telling Sophie that Auntie Jane had showed him her china doll collection and Uncle Alec had let him use his art stuff to paint a picture for daddy, whilst he was at work. Sophie and Demetri’s hands brushed and she noticed how cold it appeared “Are you cold Demetri?” She asked taking his hand in hers “Maybe a little” He replied and Sophie nodded rubbing her hands over his in an attempt to warm them up.

Demetri, Sophie and the children continued to meet up each weekend and Sophie continued to notice changes in Nico, especially that he seemed to be ‘aging’ rather quickly compared to other children his age. Demetri knew Sophie had noticed these changes in his son but she didn’t ask him about them, not after the first time. Sophie also noticed that Demetri was cold to the touch when they held hands and that he would accept the offer of a drink but never accepted the offer to eat anything when he was at her place. She felt drawn to him; she really liked him despite these little differences and hoped that he would tell her, if and when he wanted her to know.

Nico spent some time with Sulpicia and Athenodora whilst Demetri attended a trial in the throne room, although Nico didn’t know that, he just thought Demetri was on guard duty. “How have you been Nico since we last saw you?” Sulpicia asked “I’ve been ok thank you. Daddy and I went to the park a few weeks back and we met daddy’s friend Sophie and her daughter Ellie” Nico replied smiling, Athenodora and Sulpicia exchanged glances before probing gently for more information “Tell us more about Sophie and Ellie” Athenodora asked gently “Daddy met Sophie and Ellie on the plane a few months ago on his way back from the US and when Daddy took me to the park a few weeks ago we met them and have seen them every weekend since. Ellie is so tiny and so pretty” Nico answered still smiling “What is Sophie like?” Sulpicia asked “Sophie is pretty too; she has brown hair and green eyes just like Ellie. Sophie is a good cook, I really like her chocolate brownies and she makes a really nice lasagne too” He replied “She sounds lovely, I’m glad you and Daddy have made such a good friend outside the castle” Sulpicia responded with a smile “How have you both been since I last you?” Nico asked them “We’ve been ok, thank you. We have acquired some new books and art supplies” Athenodora replied and Nico nodded. Nico did some painting with Sulpicia, then had a cuddle with Athenodora whilst she read him a story.

Demetri arrived to collect his son later that afternoon to find him having a nap on Athenodora’s lap. “Thank you so much for looking after him, he’d been asking to see you both again” Demetri said with a smile “Our pleasure Demetri. We have heard all about your ‘friend’ Sophie and little Ellie” Sulpicia replied smiling and gave him a wink, if Demetri could blush, he would be. “Your secret is safe with us Demetri, do not worry about that. We’re just pleased you have finally found your one” Athenodora said as she handed Nico to him “Thank you. I plan to speak to the Kings tomorrow as I would like to tell Sophie about me, about our bond” He replied and the two Queens nodded and smiled in response.

Demetri got permission to tell Sophie about him, about vampires and their world as she became a little curious when she noticed how quickly Nico was changing. “Good afternoon masters, may I have a private word with you?” Demetri asked bowing his head “Of course my dear boy. Dismissed for now, we’ll call you back once we are done” Caius said waving his hand to dismiss the guards on duty. Once the guards had left Aro held out his hand to Demetri “May I?” Demetri nodded and placed his hand inside Aro’s. Aro saw the events of the past few weeks; Demetri and Nico going to the park and meeting Sophie and Ellie, the four of them going back to her place. The reoccurring visits to the park to see the two of them. Aro smiled and released Demetri’s hand “How can we help you?” Aro asked “I have met someone recently; her name is Sophie and she’s my mate” He replied and Marcus’ eyes lit up upon hearing this. “She’s noticed that Nico has aged a little quickly compared to his human counterparts over the past few weeks and I do not wish to lie to her. I would like permission to tell her about me, about our bond and about our world including that Nico is a hybrid” Demetri spoke to Aro; Marcus and Caius were on their thrones listening “You can tell Sophie about your bond, about Nico and about us but I would like to meet her Demetri and have Marcus confirm your bond. There is no rush per say but the sooner the better for all parties” Aro replied “Yes, I agree as we can’t help protect her if we don’t know who she is my dear boy” Marcus added and Demetri nodded “Of course. I will tell her the next time I see her and give her a little time to get used to everything and then I will bring them to the castle to meet you” He replied “Them?” Caius asked curiosity flashed through his eyes “Yes brother, them. I forgot to mention Sophie has a baby, a daughter. Demetri and Nico have met her and they all get along very well” Aro answered Caius’ question “The little girl is called Ellie and Nico absolutely adores her” Demetri told them with a smile. “Is there is a father in the picture?” Marcus asked “I am not entirely sure master. I think Sophie is a single parent like myself, although I haven’t asked about Ellie’s father and she hasn’t volunteered that information either. We haven’t discussed Nico’s mother either but I think she has guessed that she is no longer in the picture” Demetri responded “Please have that conversation too as we need to know if there will be any…complications regarding you and Sophie being together” Caius said sympathetically “I will master. Thank you” Demetri replied, bowed his head and left the throne room. He and Sophie had much to talk about the next time they saw one another.

That Saturday afternoon Demetri and Nico arrived at Sophie’s apartment after deciding it’s probably best to meet there rather than the park so other people wouldn’t notice how quickly Nico changes. Sophie had noticed the changes over the last few weeks and Demetri promised he’d explain everything during this visit. Sophie watched as Nico lay beside Ellie on the floor “This is a good story Ellie. The Prince kills the evil Fairy in order to save his Princess” He explained before reading her the story of ‘Sleeping Beauty’ “He’s really good with her” Sophie said quietly to Demetri “I know but it’s a little strange as he hasn’t been around other children; except when I took him to the park, but even then, he kept to himself. That is…until he met you and Ellie that day” He replied and she hummed in response smiling at Nico and Ellie. Once the children were bathed and put to bed Demetri and Sophie had two very important conversations, conversations that would change everything for those involved.

“Sophie I know you have noticed some differences between you and I” He begins and she nods waiting for him to continue “Well the reason I feel cold to the touch, have quick reflexes and do not really eat a lot when I’m with you is because…I’m a vampire.” She doesn’t say anything at first and he starts to worry “So-Sophie…are you ok?” She shakes her head to clear her thoughts “I-I’m fine. It’s just I…I always thought vampires only existed in books and movies” “That’s the point…humans aren’t allowed to know about us…” “Then why are you telling me?” She cut him off “I’m telling you because there things you need to know about me, about…us” She nods “Ok” “Firstly, I need you to know that you and Ellie are safe with me no matter what” He says looking into her eyes as he leans forward and takes her hands in his “I survive on a diet of blood…human blood but I have excellent self-control around humans as you have probably noticed” She nods again and he continues “I was born in Greece and was 21 when I was turned over 1000 years ago. I have lived with and worked for the Volturi, the Government / Royalty of the vampire world for about 1000 years and hold the position of ‘Elite Guard’ I am also the personal bodyguard to Marcus, one of the three Kings” “Wow! That’s a lot of information to take in” He could see the amazement in her eyes “There’s more you need to know now, the rest I can tell at a later time as to not overwhelm you” “O-ok. What else do I need to know now?” She asked and he took a deep unneeded breath “Vampires are very protective of what is theirs, possessive even. I would protect my son with my life if anyone ever tried to harm him…” “Sounds like us moms, we are also very protective of our children” He smiled at her response and nodded “We are also very protective of our mates, as we only get one in our lifetime. If we were to ever lose them, then we would be left heartbroken and over time fall into a deep depression…” He trailed off “Hence the protective / possessive nature of your kind” “Exactly Sophie. Once we meet our mate everything just…falls into place, we feel complete and are drawn to them in a way that is hard to put into words. Vampires fall in love quickly and once we do; we never fall out of love with our mate” He shifts a little closer to her and her breath catches in her throat “Sophie…you are my mate and I…” “What about Nico’s mom?” She cuts him off and he looks down for a second before looking back up at her “Nico wasn’t planned Sophie, but I love him and wouldn’t be without him. I need you to remember that…please” She nods and he tells her what happened after they got off the plane as it was the night his son was conceived and the events that followed and she could see the remorse in his eyes regarding the situation and lifted her hand and rested it against his cheek “It’s ok Demetri…I understand…more than you can imagine. He is a real credit to you, you should be proud” He leaned into her touch, his eyes closing “Thank you and I am very proud him. He also displays a good level of self-control around humans, more so since he has met you and Ellie” He smiles at her “I still cannot believe he is only eight weeks old” She chuckles “That’s his vampire side, he grows faster than his human counterparts, which means he’ll be fully grown in seven years and then won’t change after that” “Wow! So vampire parenting is a seven year deal?” She asks, surprise clearly shown on her face and he nods smiling at her “I have to wait sixteen years till Ellie is fully grown and she is about 10 weeks older than he is” “I know” He chuckled “In my defence we only found out about vampire / human hybrids about eighteen months ago when an old friend of mine’s son got his human wife pregnant on their honeymoon. After the stressful month I had had I didn’t even think about…precautions” She chuckled again “It’s ok Demetri. I’m not judging you if that is what you are worried about, I mean I’m not a virgin either. I have Ellie and although she was conceived under very different circumstances, I wouldn’t be without her” She said as her thumb gently caressed his cheek “Tell me…please. You have never mentioned her father and if he is in the picture…it may complicate things” He replied softly “Don’t worry he isn’t in the picture. It’s just me and her” She replied low.  

Sophie took a deep breath before explaining that she doesn’t know who Ellie’s father is as she was too busy squeezing her eyes shut and trying to not to think about the drunk young man who was forcing himself on her. It happened one evening after she left the college library a little later than usual and decided to take a shortcut home. Demetri felt himself get angry upon hearing that some drunk human had sexually assaulted his mate and he wasn’t around to save her “I’m so sorry Sophie…I-I should have been there to save you from that” He said as he removed her hand from his cheek, holding both of her hands in his “It’s ok…we didn’t know each other back then” She gently pulled her hands from his and looked down at her lap “I-I understand if this changes things…between us” She said low, tears building behind her eyes at the thought of losing him, as she had come to care for him “This changes nothing mi amore. You are my mate and the only woman I want in my arms forever. I am truly sorry I couldn’t protect you then but I promise you this…no one and I mean no one will ever hurt you again, not as long as I am around” He vowed and pulled her into his arms and held her as she sobbed “They-they never caught him you know…it-it’s why I left and moved here. I-I needed a new start and…I had always wanted to come to Italy” She said low, Demetri nodded “I can understand that. You didn’t feel safe there, but you are safe here…with me always” He soothed as he stroked her hair. She fell asleep in his arms on the sofa and he gently carried her to her room and placed her in bed covering her with the duvet, he placed a kiss to her hair “Goodnight mi amore.” He checked on Ellie who was sleeping soundly in her crib cuddling the little bunny toy Nico had given her a week before. Nico was asleep on the sofa bed in Ellie’s room and Demetri couldn’t help smiling at the sight of his children sleeping knowing they were safe from harm. He made his way back to Sophie’s room and climbed in beside her and gently pulled her into his arms. That night whilst she slept he had a look though her mind to try and find the tenor of the man who had harmed his Sophie, he finally found someone whose tenor was dark and fitted with what she had told him ‘he will pay for what he’s done’ he vowed silently to himself and he planned on asking Felix for his help for he knew his best friend would help hunt down and kill the man who had dared to harm what was his.

#demetri volturi #felix volturi #jane volturi #alec volturi #marcus volturi #aro volturi #caius volturi #heidi volturi #volturi #twilight

[strongsassysexysloane]

Ain’t Life A B*tch - Chap 2

Well for me... aint editing a bitch so I’m sorry if there are mistakes but I’m finding it hard to concentrate lately. 36th day in Quarantine!! 

Chapter 1 if you need a refresher or whatever :)

. . . . / 2 / . . .

The next week was spent sorting through forms and getting your new probie up to speed. She was a young buck, raised in New York, father was a cop and mum was a naval officer. So serve and protect was in her blood as she'd say. Alex Edison was her name but she preferred to go by Eddie, a nickname she hated in school but grew to love when she got older.

You managed to video call your other Agent who was flying in from Miami on the weekend. He had to sort a few more things before making the move permanently to DC. Agent Hunter, Ben Hunter, was how he introduced himself and you couldn't help but roll your eyes. You'd met him once when his case brought him to your ship a few years ago. You worked well and was happy when Vance mentioned his name as a candidate for your new team.  

"Ok, Alex. You got the form for HR?" You sighed, leaning back in your chair. You desk was perfectly positioned the next row over from Gibbs Team which meant you heard and saw almost everything that happened over there. They'd been chasing a murderer for over a week now. Everyone was running on fumes. Especially Gibbs and you couldn't help but cringe a few times when he yelled at his team.

Eddie was shocked the first time she heard him yell and you reassured her that it was ok. Her face clearly didn't believe you though.

"Just about." She answered tapping away at her computer, her desk was beside yours. So you could see her screen when you leaned back in your seat. She'd added a few picture frames around her desk, one of her dog, another of her and her mum and the third was an old grey and white photo of her grandparents.

You smiled as she hurried up. "All good, once you've finished that. Send it to HR and if you want we can grab a drink?" You suggest, it had been a paper heavy week and you needed to unwind away from a computer screen.

"Aww, I need a drink." A sad voice piped up from over the divider.

You twirled your chair around to see Ellie standing and looking over at you. You'd managed to chat to her a few times, mainly in the break room when she escaped to get a snack which was quite often. "You're more than welcome to join."

She smiled at your offer but her eyes darted down to where Gibbs mustve been sitting and you shrug. It was almost 1800 on Friday. They hadn't had a break in the case all day, you knew because you caught their huffs and complaints about it all day. "Gibbs?" Ellie said with so much hope, you could tell by the bags under her young eyes that they'd been working longer hours than usual.

"Yeah, there's nothing we can do tonight."

"You can join to if you want Gibbs." You shout and laugh at Ellie's and Eddie's reaction to his invitation. You knew all too well what his reply was going to be, what it always would be in the middle of a case with no leads.

Gibbs stood up, leaning over the divider and smiling down at you. As he said the words, you mimed his answer. "Bourbon, boat, basement." Everyone chuckled at your response. "Why'd you ask?" His eyes were curious. Clearly bemused by you miming and knowing his answer as he said it.

"I'm being polite and a nice colleague." You smile, seeing Eddie send off the form so you began to gather up your things.

"Hey Jack!" Ellie beamed, as the other blonde strode into the bullpen and you stilled for a second. Your back was now turned to Gibbs, you could feel his eyes burning into your back, he saw you freeze. You'd successfully avoided Jack all week. Only catching glimpses of her on the promenade and once when she came to help Gibbs team with profiles. Neither of you gave each other a second glance and as much as you were thankful for it, your gut was getting more and more twisted with every glimpse you saw her. Not to mention your subconscious derailing you every night by replaying the break up and the moment outside of MTAC when you came back.

"Ellie, you heading out?" She tried her best to sound up beat but you could hear the hostility in her voice.

You shucked on your coat, slipping on your gloves and packing up your desk. "You ready?" You look over at Alex who is shutting down her computer.

"Yep." She jumps up, stretching and grabbing her coat and bag.

"Hey y/n, can Jack join us for drinks?" The words you hoped you'd never hear but knew it was coming. You knew Jack was close with the other team and why wouldn't she be? She's a friendly, warm - shut up brain. Trying to gather as much composure as possible you turn with the best painted smile you could muster.

"Ellie I'm sure-" You were ready to make up any kind of excuse but as soon as your eyes locked with Jack's you couldn't finish.

Without a missing a beat Jack picked up your excuse. "I'm busy tonight. Just heading out now to go on a date actually." Her eyes look back to Ellie who is now too curious about Jack's date. You on the other hand are trying your best to ignore that stab to the heart that had nothing to do with Jack's words about a date. Or the way her eyes darted to Gibbs and he shared a look when she said date.

"I'm ready." Alex smiles, you can tell she's trying to distract you. Your composure mustn't be as good as you hoped.

You clap your glove covered hands. "Right.. Ellie, we'll meet you there?" You wait a tick to get Ellie's reply, not daring to look at Jack again. Ellie looks from you to Jack curiously. You were trying so hard not to let anyone notice anything between you and Jack, Gibbs didn't count, and it was starting to come through.

"Sure. Devil's?" You nod and follow Eddie to the elevator.

"See you there. First rounds on me!" You shout over your shoulder and hop into the elevator.

"I'm coming!" Nick shouts and you just hake your head with a smile.

The night wasn't as awkward as you thought it might be. No one brought up the moment in the squadroom even though you could see the question on Ellie's lips. You had a few drinks and got to know each other a lot more. Nick even got up and danced when one of his favourite songs came out of the speakers, he tried his best to drag Bishop up but she held on tightly to the post next to your table. It was nice, you felt like you were settling more and more into living and working in DC. Something you thought would take a while.

You and Eddie hung around a while after Nick and Ellie had to call it a night. They unfortunately still had to work in the morning both hoping they'd have a lead or this was going to be an awfully long weekend for them both.

"How are you liking DC?" Alex's eyes wondered to the tv screen above the bar, you could see she was trying to seem disinterested but you'd tried your best all night to avoid your personal life all night. Always flipping it back to the asker, it had worked, Nick always liked talking about himself.

You wanted to be open with Alex, to create a partnership with her more so than being like a boss. You wanted to create that boundary but this job was going to get serious really quickly and you wanted to create a bond that you could lean on each other as well. After all these people were going to be in your life for hopefully many years to come. Drawing in a deep breath you thought about your answer. It was a simple question but it could lead to harder ones.

"Colder than I like but I did always enjoy the snow." A bit vague but you wanted to see where Alex would take it. To see if she was willing to go straight to the question she really wanted to know. "What about you?"

Her eyes snapped back to the table, taking a sip of her drink. "I like the pace of DC. Managed to find a somewhat decent place to live."

"Yeah you mentioned that earlier. Seems like a score for me and being a short drive to work as well." She was really impressive for her age, stepping out and following her ambitions, you admired that.

"You don't have to answer but.." Her eyes shifted nervously, you knew what was coming. "You and Agent Sloane? Did something happen before I came along?" Her eyes flicked to yours, you weren't hiding your feelings on the subject. The alcohol may have had something to do that by now. You'd kept it steady all night and now it was finally taking it's toll.

"Something did.. a long time ago." You shrug as nonchalantly as possible, bringing your glass to your lips and taking a long swig.

"Must've been -"

"We were in a serious relationship and I-" You sigh, dropping you head back. You really didn't want to talk about it, alcohol or no alcohol. Bonding or no bonding, you weren't ready for this admission. Out loud anyway.

"So when does Ben arrive again?" Alex gave you a comforting smile and you relaxed at the subject change.

The night soon came to a close, you made sure Alex had a ride before making your way home. It was nice to have a night together outside of the office. To get to know each other more and with other friends as well. The crisp night air made you shiver and you hugged yourself closer to the wall of the bar while you waited for your Uber.

The weekend you managed to keep yourself busy by shopping and finding things to decorate your apartment with. You managed to find some cute things at the local markets on Saturday morning. Your apartment was slowly filling up with things you liked and you felt content with your efforts. Shopping was never an pleasure for you but you needed to make your apartment feel more like a home. After all you would be staying around for hopefully a long time. On Sunday you managed to find a small dining set that would fit perfectly in your small dining area and a cute, round, wide chair that you thought would be great curling up on after a long days work. Come Sunday afternoon you were all shopped out and curled up on said new purchase with a blanket and cup of hot chocolate, testing the new furniture out.

There was no case come Monday morning however Agent Ben Hunter had arrived and kept you busy catching up and filling out his paperwork for his transfer. "So I filled in the form for payroll and have the other documents are being sent through to HR."

"Excellent." You smiled over at Ben. He was very to the point and full steam ahead. You just hoped that was the same when it came to being in the field and on cases.

You got distracted by the team over the divider. They'd caught a cast late Sunday afternoon and apparently had been going since then. Nick was very loud about the lack of sleep he'd had and Ellie would bite back every so often saying they were all in the same boat.

"Alright team. I have profiles for you." You heard her voice, the pep and energy clearly evident compared to the rest of the team. "Come on. The quicker you look into these guys the quicker you could get some sleep. Or you know, Gibbs. Send them home. They need rest." She was all too blunt and head strong about it and you were waiting for Gibbs' snark remark about it's his team but it never came.

"'robably right Jack but we gotta get this guy. Grab a coffee and we'll follow up on the profiles." He grunted and you heard his chair squeak meaning he'd gotten up and you watched as he and Jack walked around and waited at the elevator.

You sunk further into your chair, hiding slightly more behind your desk as you watched Jack and Gibbs walk into the elevator turn around and Jack was laughing at something with a smiling Gibbs. Your gut twinged and you grunted at it to shut up. The elevators door shut and you went back to the emails you were following up on.

"Everything alright y/n?" Ben spoke up, clearly noticing your reaction to Jack's presence.

"Fine." You tried to smile but doubted it came across as convincing. You shot a look at Alex not to say anything, not that you thought she would. "Going to get a snack from the break room. Want anything?" You looked between your teammates.

"Good, thanks Boss." Alex smiled at you then returned to her computer.

"Can I have a kitkat? I'll pay ya back when I have cash." He dug into his top draw to find some money but only came up with a few coins.

"It's fine." You genuinely smile at his efforts. "Think I can handle it." You wink at him and he chuckles.

"Thanks Boss." You shake your head at the name. It was still very new to you. Being the leader and in charge but Boss did have a nice ring to it, even if you and Ben were around the same age. You walked around the bullpen, coming up to Tim's desk.

"Nutterbutter right?" The sound of his favourite snack snapped McGee's face from his computer screen.

"Right." He beamed and you just kept walking. Same old McGee.  

You're in the middle of bashing the vending machine after the nutterbutter gets stuck, Tony probably did something years ago to the machine to annoy McGee, when your phone rings. "Agent Y/n. Yes, ok, we'll be there." You give the vending machine one last bang and the nutterbutter falls free. You walk, pick up your coffee and snacks and exit the room.

Gibbs is back, you hear him before you turn the corner. The site of the older blonde almost has you miss a step but you don't. You've got a murder to solve. "Timmy!" You shout, drawing everyone's attention and McGee beams as you chuck him his treat in passing. "Good catch. Gibbs been giving you pointers?" You wink at him, trying your best to not seem effected by Jack's presence.

"Nah, having two kids, you learn quickly how to juggle." You both share a laugh and you continue onto your team. "Not to mention years of avoiding Tony's antics."

"We still need to have that dinner Tim. Maybe after our cases are solved." You say over your shoulder, doing your best to avoid eye contact with Jack. She's been looking back and forth between you and Tim the whole time. Mainly looking at Tim. At least that's what you could see without looking at her directly.  

"We got a case boss?" Alex pipes up as you walk around and grab your sig and badge out of your desk, slipping into your NCIS jacket. It fit like a glove, it was several years old but there was no way you were letting Vance give you a new one. This one had seen you through most of your Agent Afloat adventures.

"You betcha. Dead Petty Officer downtown. Grab ya gear." You straighten up and look over at Gibbs who is smirking, you ignore the blonde beside him and give him a wink. "Old habits. Let's go." You were probably too eager about getting a case, it was exciting, your first case with your own team plus you were itching to get out of the office with your beautiful ex standing right there.

Is that what she'd become an ex? Like obviously she was an ex but to be just another number in a very short list of relationships? You never wanted to add her to that list but she'd ended up on it all the same.

. . . . / 2 / . . . . 

#ncis #jack sloane x reader #jack sloane #jacqueline sloane #aintlifeabitchstory

[temilyrights]

Everything to Me

Summary: JACK SLOANE/ELLIE BISHOP.  Fake Dating AU – Ellie asks Jack to pretend to be her date to a friend’s wedding after finding out Jake is attending with his new fiancée. Neither of them could predict how it ended.

A/N: This has been a long time coming! This is the longest fic I've written ever and also my first which isn't with a 'reader'. Basically, I just wanted to read a Bishop/Sloane Fic so you all got one. I hope you enjoy! It, let me know if you like the pairing and I might right this paring again in the future. If it's OOC at all, I apologise! There's a couple of Quishop (Quinn/Bishop) references in here because I couldn't resist! (Sorry for any mistakes, I'm tired)

Read on A03

“Ellie!”

Ellie swore under her breath, turning around to face the approaching man, fake smile plastered on her face. “Jake, fancy seeing you here.” She laughed awkwardly, picking up the coffee she'd gone to get for her and Jack. They were stuck at NCIS going over case files, and knowing they were in for a late-night, they’d taken a break and she had volunteered to go get coffee.

“How have you been? It’s been what? 3 years? You still working at NCIS?” Jake asked patronizingly like it was a bad thing. Ellie wanted to roll her eyes…or punch him.

“Yep, still at NCIS, you still dating Taylor?” She hid her smirk behind her coffee cup but frowned when she noticed Jakes smile widening as he turned to look at the woman coming up behind him.

“No, but this is Mia, my fiancée.” Jake’s arm wrapped around the stunning brunette. Ellie clamped her teeth together. “You still single?” Jake’s condescending tone and smug expression were enough to make her want to scream.

She was not letting this bastard show her up. “No actually” Ellie smiled smugly “I’m dating someone.”

“Who?”

“Jack” Her cheeks tinged pink. “She’s amazing.”

“She?” Jake stuttered.

“Yeah” Ellie smirked “This coffee is actually for her, so I better be getting back. Nice to see you Jake, Mia.” She smiled, signalling her head towards the door.

“Right yeah, see you at Caitlin’s wedding.” Ellie froze. The wedding. Shit.

“Y-you’re going to Caitlin’s wedding?” Ellie stammered.

“Yeah. Are you bringing Jack?”

Fuck! “Oh-I…She might be working, I-”

“Aww, a shame,” Jake smirked. That was it, She’d had enough.

“Jack’s hoping to come. Demanding job the NCIS. I’m sure she’d love to meet you though. Now I must be going. Cases don’t solve themselves.” Ellie smiled, walking out of the coffee shop and making her way back to NCIS quietly fuming the whole way.

 ---------------------

 “Did you get lost?” Jack laughs as Ellie rushes into her office. She stops to hand Jack her now probably lukewarm coffee and places her own cup down on the table before flopping onto the sofa next to Jack.

“I ran into Jake.” Ellie moans. Jack winces turning to face Ellie.

“Your ex-husband…How did that go?”

“He introduced me to his new fiancée, Mia.” The disdain drips from her voice. Jack winces again and reaches out, putting a comforting hand on Ellie’s. Ellie ducked her head hiding her blush from the contact and groaned loudly. “I don’t even care but he was being all smug and condescending and I wanted to punch him and he asked if I was single and I didn’t want to say yes because he’d just look at me pitifully and say something about how there’s ‘still time’ so I might have…” Ellie trailed off, throwing her head back against the sofa.

“You said what?”

“I may have told him I was dating you.” She mumbled, staring up at the ceiling as heat spread over her face.

“Me?” Jack asked in shock, hand leaving Ellie’s.

“Your name was the first to come to my head and I know it was stupid, I’m sorry!” Ellie whined looking back at Jack who had a light blush spread over her face.

“Well, I doubt it matters right, that’s the first time you’ve seen him since the divorce? What’s the chance you’ll see him again.” Jack laughed and when Ellie didn’t respond, she frowned “Ellie?”

“You know that wedding I’m going to next weekend?” Jack nodded slowly as Ellie looked back to the ceiling, embarrassed. “Well…It turns out he’s going as well and I made an excuse but then he was smirking and I broke and told him you really wanted to be there…” Jack didn’t say anything, and when Ellie turned to look at Jack she was surprised to see her holding back a laugh. “Don’t laugh! It’s not funny!” Ellie smiled, hitting Jack playfully.

“I’m sorry” Jack snorts, causing both her and Ellie to break out into laughter. Once they’d both calmed back down Jack grinned devilishly “So you need a date?”

Ellie’s heart skipped a beat at Jack’s expression, gulping slightly she nodded.

“Okay.”

“O-okay?” Ellie stuttered, stunned at how easily Jack had accepted. A date…with Jack? She blushed.

“Well, what are friends for, if not to save them from embarrassment,” Jack smirked, and Ellie felt her heart drop slightly but ignored it, not wanting to unpack that can of worms anytime soon. “Now about this profile” Jack continues, picking up the folder on her lap and gently tapping Ellie’s knee. They both quickly got back into the flow of work and Ellie was grateful to let the conversation drop at least for a few days.

 ---------------------

 Ellie had been delaying this conversation for as long as possible but with the wedding tomorrow, she knew they needed a backstory because people were going to ask questions. Ellie dragged her feet as she made her way to Jack’s office and lightly knocked on the door.

“Come in!” called the voice from inside. Ellie slowly opened the door, Jack looked up and grinned when she saw who it was, and she felt her nerves slightly ease. “You feeling prepared for the wedding?”

“That’s what I wanted to talk about actually…” Ellie bites her lip awkwardly and makes her way into the room, closing the door behind her and moving to sit in the chair in front of Jack’s desk “We need to create a backstory; people will definitely ask questions.”

“Oh ok, sure. Well, you know these people so when did your last relationship end?” Ellie was grateful that Jack was looking at the folder in front of her instead of Ellie, so she didn’t notice her cheeks flush. She cleared her throat awkwardly “Nothing really in the last year.” There had only been the odd date since Qasim’s death, nothing had ever developed into a proper relationship. “What about you? They’ll be lots of people from the NSA attending and I know you’ve mentioned friends there before…”

Jack gulps “oh uh- Izzy.” Ellie feels her jaw drop open and Jack clears her throat, heat prickling her cheeks as she bites her lip. “Wasn’t my smartest decision…only lasted a couple of months.”

“Right…I just thought that she and Nick …” Ellie trails off, still in shock over the confession.

“Oh, no, no. Izzy’s a big flirt but that’s usually all it is, flirting.” Jack shrugs obviously uncomfortable with the conversation.

“So, time frame?” Ellie quickly sets the subject back on track and Jack looks relieved.

“How about 6 months?”

“So, around Christmas? Romantic” Ellie teased, and Jack smirked at her.

“Apart from when you asked me-”

“Wait! It wouldn’t be me! It would’ve been you” Ellie protested, almost jumping from the chair.

“when you asked me, You were incredibly awkward, and it took me about 5 minutes to realise you were trying to ask me out on a date. I, of course, said yes.” Ellie and Jack both stared at each other as Jack spoke, smiling softly. Ellie released a shaky breath.

“I took you too that fancy little Italian place you love, even though it was way too expensive for me and wooed you.” Jacks eyes twinkled. The lighting there was sweet and romantic and the food glorious. And at the end of dinner, Jack would have kissed-No! Ellie shook her head to get rid of the intruding thoughts. It wasn’t real.

 ---------------------

 Ellie rang the doorbell, fiddling with her dress as she waited for Jack to answer. Ellie felt on show but wanted to look her absolute best to show up her bastard of an ex. Although she had no interest in him whatsoever and was honestly glad their marriage was over, she couldn’t help the small part of her that wanted to show him exactly what he’d lost.

When the door opened Ellie felt her brain short circuit at the sight in front of her. Jack was wearing a red dress, with a surprisingly high slit which Ellie’s eyes automatically zeros in on.

“You look hot as hell.” Ellie gulped at the same time Jack released a breathless “wow” causing them both to break out into light blushes and awkward laughter.

Ellie’s eyes focus back on Jack’s leg and Jack releases an uncomfortable cough, startling her out of her trance. “You ready to go?”

“Right…yes. Yes. Let’s go.” Ellie fumbles, spinning around and walking to her car, ignoring Jack’s laugh as she locks up her house.

 ---------------------

 “You ready for this?” Jack asks as Ellie turns off the car engine, staring at the church across the street.

Ellie takes a deep breath before blowing it out “Ready as I’ll ever be” She opens the car door and gets out, Jack following behind her. As they’re about to walk in Ellie hesitantly holds out her hand, Jack takes it squeezing reassuringly before smiling at Ellie and making their way in. Ellie ignores the flutter in her chest.

Unsurprisingly Jake is one of the first people they run into, Mia hanging from his arm. Ellie tenses, teeth grinding in anger.

“Calm down” Jack breathes into her ear “Anyway, the woman’s got nothing on you.” Ellie stares at Jack in surprise and Jack smiles sweetly. The flutter in her chest now a full-blown storm.

“Ellie, hello.” Ellie’s got no idea how even 2 words could make her want to smash his face in. Jack squeezes her hand tighter.

“Jake. Mia. Nice to see you both. This is my girlfriend Jack.”

“I’ve heard many things.” Jack smirks, a devilish glint in her eye. Jake looks intimidated and the smile on his face vanishes and Ellie wants to burst out laughing.

“I just love your dresses,” Mia smiles from beside Jake “How long have you been together?”

“Thank you. 6 beautiful months” Jack beamed, pulling Ellie into her side and kissing her cheek. Ellie tenses slightly in surprise, a blush again gracing her features.

“Oh wow! We’ve been together about the same amount of time! We met at a party and hit it off straight away” Mia hungrily kisses Jake.

“oh god” Ellie mouths to Jack uncomfortably and Jack smothers a laugh into Ellie’s shoulder.

“Sorry,” Jake says unapologetically “The love between me and Mia is just hard to contain sometimes.”

“Right…Well, we really should be sitting down, so we’ll see you later.” Ellie pulls Jack away and they head over to the aisles to take a seat “Can you believe him? ‘The love between me and Mia is just hard to contain sometimes’ What does that even mean?” They both break out laughing. The people in front of them turn around and frown, they both duck their heads laughing even louder.

 ---------------------

 The ceremony was beautiful but now all Ellie wanted to do was fill herself with alcohol, regretting the fact she’d decided to drive here.

They got into Ellie’s car, narrowly avoiding Jake again.

“Why is he so damn insistent on talking to me?” Ellie whined as she hit the steering wheel.

“He’s trying to convince himself that he’s doing better than you, which is obviously not the case for the fact he’s trying to convince himself” Jack laughed, placing her hand on Ellie’s. “He knows he made a mistake and whereas you moved on, he’s stayed in the same place…I feel sorry for Mia.”

“Yeah, maybe I should tell her to run.” Jack removes her hand as Ellie starts up the car and pulls out of the church’s parking lot.

“I doubt she’d listen; she hangs off his every word.” Jack sighs.

Ellie smirks slightly.

“I wanted to thank you again for doing this, you’ve given up your whole Saturday for me.” Ellie looks over to Jack to see her already looking at her. Ellie gulps, focusing back on the road. “It’s not a problem, and anyway I get the chance to see what it would be like to date the legendary Ellie Bishop.” Jack laughs and Ellie nearly crashes her car.

 ---------------------

 “Let’s go get drinks,” Ellie says the second they enter the reception hall. Car be damned. She knew there was no way she was making it through this whole event without the help of alcohol.

It’s a large hall, decorated with lots of white tulle, blue accents, and pretty lights. Tables and chairs fill the room, a dance floor behind them and a bar sits to the side of the room, already full of guests ordering their drinks. Music fills the room, but Ellie ignores all of that as she makes her way over to the bar.

“What do you drink?” Ellie asks, linking arms with Jack.

“Anything.” Jack shrugs.

Ellie orders 2 Gin and Tonics, drinking half of hers before Jack can even take a sip. Jack doesn’t say anything, just raises her eyebrows.

Finding their seats isn’t hard. They’re the first ones to the table, and a quick glance at the place cards shows it’s just people she used to work with at the NSA. Ellie’s just grateful Caitlin had the common sense not to sit her at the same table as Jake.

“Ellie? Eleanor Bishop? Is that you?” Ellie’s head snaps around, her face brightening into a wide smile when she spots who it is.

“Lauren! Oh my god! Hi, Hello, how have you been? Where’s Evelyn?” She pulls the older woman into a tight hug.

“I’m good, you? Evelyn’s getting here later, she got called into work.”

“I’m good, it’d be great to catch up with her too. I haven’t seen either of you since Emma’s birthday!” Lauren had been somewhat of a mentor for Ellie at the NSA and the two had grown close, she’d been to her and Evelyn’s wedding, was even godmother to their daughter Emma, however, she hadn’t seen them in ages.

Ellie turns grabbing Jack’s hand and pulling her over tightly to her side “Jack this is Lauren, we worked together at the NSA. Lauren, this is my girlfriend Jack, she works with me at NCIS.”

Lauren’s eyes sparkle in interest, but she doesn’t say anything, instead shaking Jack’s hand “Nice to meet you.” Jack says sliding her arm around Ellie’s waist.

“And you. No wonder Ellie won’t come back to the NSA however many times we try to poach her, I wouldn’t either if I was working with agents who look like you!”

Jack laughs awkwardly while Ellie blushes beat-red. “Lauren!” Lauren just laughs.

“I think it’s me who’s the lucky one.” Jack’s hand is brushing lightly at Ellie’s side and when Ellie’s eyes flick to her Jack winks. The blonde doesn’t know how to respond but her body definitely does, and Ellie finally admits to herself that maybe this wasn’t the best idea.

Because ok…maybe she had a tiny crush on Jack. But it was tiny, just co-worker infatuation. Yes, she sometimes thought about kissing Jack and taking her on dates and ok maybe there had been a dream where Jack had pinned her up against a wall and-NO. It just wasn’t helping being this close to Jack for this long, it was just making her body feel things that it shouldn’t be feeling for her friend. Ellie’s face heats up as she’s drawn away from her thoughts and back into the conversation. Lauren is telling Jack about her children, but she can tell Jack’s only half-listening, choosing instead to shoot concerned looks at Ellie. Ellie ignores her, grabbing her drink and swigging the rest of the liquid.

The hall soon fills up and they sit at their now full table. Over the course of the meals, Ellie isn’t surprised about the number of questions fired at her from the table of old friends, the last time she’d seen most of them she’d been married to Jake. They hold up the story well though.

“You look really good together, it’s lovely to see you so in love again Ellie.” Lauren smiles. Ellie feels like hiding under the table, instead, Jack grabs her hand that’s placed on the table, and then shocks Ellie by again leaning over to kiss Ellie lightly on the cheek.

“Are you ok?” Jack whispers into her ear and Ellie nods, now even more overwhelmed by the smell of Jack’s perfume, and her breath tickling her neck.

“I’m good” She looks away from Jack who’s watching her closely. Ellie instead takes a gulp from her drink, pushing her plate away suddenly no longer hungry.

Their hands remained clasped together, falling onto Ellie’s lap, for the remainder of the meal. Ellie doesn’t even really notice, already used to it and the comfort it brings.

 ---------------------

 They are standing by the bar, drinking another round of drinks when Lauren comes over to them “I haven’t seen you girls dance all night.”

“I’m not much of a dancer.”

“Oh, that’s the biggest lie ever Bishop! Or do you not remember my wedding?” Ellie blushes at the memory and Jack looks intrigued.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about” Ellie mutters, trying to sink further into her chair.

“Probably because you ended up passed out in a booth.” Evelyn says, coming over to hand her wife a drink and placing a kiss on her cheek. Jack’s head shoots away from Ellie and towards the new woman. “Eve?” Jack questions in wonder.

“Jackie?”

“Jackie?” Ellie mouths, scrunching up her face. Lauren notices and laughs quietly.

“What are you doing here? How? I haven’t seen you since I left California!”

“I work at NCIS now, I’ve been here a few years! I thought you’d moved to Chicago?”

“Hello” Ellie pipes in (totally not slightly jealous at all) “How do you guys know each other?”

“Right yes…. Eve and I dated when I lived in California” Jack barely glances at her before her focus is back on Evelyn again.

“Wait she’s that Jack?” Lauren looks shocked and sends a calculated gaze at Jack.

“It must have been 8 years ago? I got a promotion and moved to Chicago, and long-distance just didn’t work, we lost contact. I moved to Washington about a year and a half later and then I met Lauren.” Evelyn looked between Ellie and Jack “You’re dating Ellie?”

“Yeah, we’ve been together for about 6 months” Jack squeezed Ellie’s hand tightly.

Lauren looks over to her wife “I told you.” She singsongs while Evelyn rolls her eyes.

“Told her what?” Ellie questions suspiciously.

“That you totally had a thing for that Alex girl you used to work with, you used to gush about her whenever we met up ‘Oh Alex is just so amazing’. Evelyn thought you were straight, but I knew it!” Ellie’s face goes bright red as Evelyn and Lauren laugh.

“Alex?” Jack questions sharply “As in Alex Quinn?” Ellie feels her face heat up further as Jack directs her interested gaze towards her.

“Hmm…didn’t you say something about a dance?” Ellie drags Jack up and onto the dance floor before she can even question it, ignoring Evelyn and Lauren as their laughter gets louder.

“I thought you didn’t dance” Jack smirks, pulling Ellie into her arms. Ellie wraps her arms around Jack’s neck, sighing.

“I don’t but I wasn’t going to sit there and have them laugh at me.”

“Well, you chose a good song,” Jack smiles softly. Ellie’s heart flutters “Perfect for our story.” Ellie gulps, trying to hiding the disappointment from her face.

She hated how swept up in the charade she was getting. This whole day had felt so natural with Jack and hated to think in a few hours they would be back to ‘normal’. No more hand-holding, kisses and dancing.

“Alex? I didn’t know…” Ellie tenses up. “Sorry I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable”

“No, it’s fine. It ended before it even really began. She left” Ellie shrugs. They had kissed but then Paraguay happened, and Alex had to go home to look after her mother and that was that.

“And no one knew?” The twinkle in Jack’s eye unnerves her.

“Not that I’m aware” She shrugs again but wanting this line of questioning to end she changes the subject “So…Jackie” Ellie grins wickedly.

Jack groans and Ellie laughs “An unfortunate nickname I left in California for good reason.”

“I prefer Jack anyway” Ellie smiles, playing with a strand of hair that falls into Jack’s face before hesitantly asking “and Evelyn?”

“We were together for nearly 2 years. It would never have lasted though. I still wasn’t doing well because of Afghanistan” Ellie rested her head on Jack’s shoulder, Jack hugging her closer. They weren’t even dancing now.

“Thank you” Ellie pulls back slightly so she can look at Jack’s face again. Their faces are so close now, she can barely breathe. Jack’s watching her closely and Ellie’s eyes scan her face, before focusing on her lips. All she had to do was dip her head slightly and-

“Ellie!” Ellie jumps, quickly backing away from Jack.

“Caitlin? Hi!” Ellie’s still trying to calm her pounding heart when she’s pulled into a hug by the woman. “This wedding has been beautiful, thank you so much for inviting me”

“We need to meet up soon. You’ve only met Philip a handful of times, and I’m yet to even meet your girlfriend.” Caitlin looks at Jack curiously, Jack extends her hand.

“Jack. Congratulations”

“Nice to meet you Jack” Caitlin grinned. “Anyway, I’ve still got a lot of guests to talk to, so I’ll see you later”

Ellie pulled Caitlin into another tight hug, saying goodbye before turning back to Jack.

“Jack-”

“I’m going to go get another round” Jack’s walking over to the bar before Ellie can say anything. She sighs and heads outside.

 Ellie’s barely sat down before Jake’s coming over. All she wanted was a moment of peace. A moment to escape from everything. Being so close to Jack the whole day was playing with her head. If Caitlin hadn’t interrupted them would she have kissed her? God she was so close to ruining everything, Jack must know considering how quickly she’d run from Ellie.

“Jack gone home already?” Jake’s attempts of being smug were getting more laughable every time they spoke.

“No Jake. She’s getting drinks.” and possibly avoiding me “What do you want?”

“You can’t honestly expect me to believe your relationship, right?” Ellie rolls her eyes, quietly seething. She watched the view of the surrounding garden from her seat instead of giving Jake the satisfaction of her full attention.

“And why’s that? Because she’s a woman?”

“Partly, but also because you know she’s way out of your league, right?” Ouch. “You’ll never do better than me and you were stupid to let me go. I’m- WHAT THE FUCK!” Jake screamed. Ellie looked up, breaking into hysterics. Jake was standing there, glaring at a very pissed off Jack who was holding two empty glasses in her hand.

“Oops sorry” Ellie continued laughing at Jack’s sarcastic tone. Jake stood there, wiping the sticky liquid from his face, huffing as he glared daggers at both of them, before turning around, literally stomping his food and walking away. Ellie’s laughter died down as she stared at Jack in wonder.

“Why? You didn’t have too…” Ellie trailed off unsure what to even say.

“He can’t speak to you like that! You deserve anyone you want Bishop. You have such a gigantic heart and the person who you decide to give it to…well…” Jack cleared her throat “The bastards lucky I only threw the drinks at him” Jack ranted angrily, Ellie moved towards her, placing her hand on Jacks arm to calm her. It did almost instantly.

“You think I deserve anyone?” Could that mean? Ellie watched Jack closely, hand still resting on her arm, but the woman was near impossible to read when she didn’t want to be.

“Of course. I know about your feelings…” Oh my, here it comes! “…for Torres.”

Ellie let her hand drop; her mouth hangs agape “Torres? I don’t- I’ve never-”

“Hey, it’s alright” Jack moves forward, grabbing hold of Ellie’s hand as a warm, supportive smile graces her features. Her eyes were unreadable. “I’ve known since Izzy; it’s why you didn’t like her right? She and Nick flirted constantly.” Ellie just stood there. Pain erupting in her chest cause holy shit how had she been so wrong. She’d really thought for a second that Jack liked her back. “So, I’m right, right?”

“Yep” Ellie croaked, ducking her head, what else could she say? ‘No, actually I think I’ve got big scary feelings for you and now I’m positive I’ve got no chance with you I’m going to tell you anyway’ hell no. She’d just crush it all down again go back to before when it was a ‘tiny crush’ she put in a box and mostly ignored. She could easily do that again. Whoever said bottling emotions up was unhealthy was obviously wrong.

 ---------------------

 “Thank you again for today” Ellie says quietly. They’re both standing outside, the wedding over, waiting for separate Ubers as they live in different directions. Ellie kind of wishes she hadn’t drunk just so they could continue their facade a bit longer.

“I had a good time actually. Good music, food, and company what more could a girl ask for.” The joke falls flat, Jack grimaced. Ellie rubs her arms suddenly feeling cold. The air felt different, uncomfortable and she doesn’t like it. Her phone pings.

“My Ubers here” Jack pulls her into a hug and as Ellie pulls away to plant a kiss on Jack’s cheek, she accidentally ends up hitting the corner of Jack’s mouth. Ellie lingers as Jack stills. They lock eyes, Ellie is holding her breath as Jack pulls back slightly her eyes sweeping over Ellie’s lips. Jack leans back in and Ellie follows, her lips covering Jack’s. Jack releases a breathy sigh as Ellie deepens the kiss. Jack tastes like alcohol and sugar and Ellie’s already addicted. Jack’s phone pings this time causing them to both pull away.

“That’s my Uber. I should be going.” Jack says not looking at Ellie

“Wait, Jack-”

“I can’t do this Ellie” Jack has tears in her eyes. she turns around and leaves before Ellie can say anything else.

Ellie takes a deep breath confused as tears come to her eyes. Jack doesn’t look back and Ellie wipes at her eyes as she turns around and makes her way over to the car waiting for her. The second she gets into the car the tears start to fall as the sharp pain in her chest becomes overwhelming and all over again Ellie’s losing something she never even had.

She wakes up the next morning to a text.

“I’m sorry about last night. I had had too much to drink, it didn’t mean anything. I hope we can forget about it and move on.”

Ellie sits there staring at the text for she doesn’t know how long before throwing her phone on the floor and hiding under the covers. ‘It didn’t mean anything’ running through her head over and over again.

 ---------------------

 It’s Monday and Ellie’s sitting at her desk eating a breakfast muffin when she notices Tim and Nick are both watching her, smirking suspiciously. “What?” Ellie barks at them and that only causes then to smirk harder.

“And a good morning to you too Bishop, nice weekend?” Tim looks like he’s about to start laughing and Ellie glares at him. “Just didn’t you had that wedding this weekend?” He continues “because funnily enough, we overheard a certain blonde talking to Director Vance this morning about how she spent her Saturday at a wedding.” Ellie bites her lip still glaring but they ignore it.

“Imagine that! Both of you happen to be at a wedding on the same day.” Nick now has the biggest shit-eating grin on his face “And didn’t Ellie mention something about having a date to this wedding?”

“Oh yes! That’s right, she did Nick.” Ellie crosses her arms across her chest and they just stare back at her obviously waiting for her to explain.

Ellie sighs, knowing they were never going to let it drop “Fine” the guys high five, causing Ellie to roll her eyes as they make their way over to stand in front of her desk “Yes, Jack was my date BUT” Their gleeful expressions drop “It was a fake date, she was helping me because Jake was there.” Ellie shrugs, getting up from her desk and feigning interest in a filing cabinet, ignoring the ache in her chest.

“A fake date?” Tim’s voice is full of scepticism and Ellie begins to heat up and her thoughts go back to Saturday night. She slams the draw. “Damn it! After the whole Quinn situation-”

“THE WHOLE WHAT” Ellie’s voice rises about 3 octaves as she turns around to stare at Tim and Nick in complete shock, her cheeks now on fire. She was so sure no one knew anything.

“You really thought no one knew?” Nick laughs “God, you and her flirted constantly.”

“However, it’s not nearly as much as the number of wistful looks you and Sloane send to each other.” Tim smirks

“It’s actually quite disturbing.” Nick’s face mushes up in disgust and Tim laughs.

“I don’t send wistful looks at her!” Ellie protested shout-whispering, as she looked around the room making sure no one was listening. They both begin laughing again and Ellie huffs, quickly exiting the room.

 She heads to the break room, desperate for a snack to help calm her. She slams the code and money in for her favourite chocolate bar and kicks the machine in frustration when it doesn’t move.

“Whoa! Are you ok?” Ellie whips around, finding Jack standing in the centre of the room and all Ellie feels is pain when Jack's eyes don’t quite meet hers.

“Yep, I’m good…so good” Sarcasm drips from her voice as Ellie turns back around to the machine, she shakes it slightly and the chocolate bar falls loose. She sighs in satisfaction, grabbing the chocolate, ripping the wrapper and taking a large bite.

“You’re eating your stress chocolate,” Jack says it so quietly Ellie nearly misses it.

“Yeah, just a bad morning I guess” Ellie shrugs, Jack finally looks at her and Ellie can see the pain in her eyes. Ellie looks away.

“I’m sorry” Jack says barely above a whisper

“It’s cool. It didn’t mean anything right?” The challenge in Ellie’s voice would be hard to miss as Ellie raises her eyebrow at her.

Jack ducks her head “Are we good?”

“Sure” Ellie sighs, she throws the rest of her chocolate bar into the bin not looking at Jack as she heads back to the bullpen.

It didn’t mean anything. Neither of them could even look at each other and all Ellie could think about every time she saw Jack was that the taste of her and how good the whole evening felt being in Jack’s arms. Her heart ached. No, they weren’t good. They were broken and Ellie had no idea how to fix that.

---------------------

 “So, has either of you actually admitted your feelings for each other yet?” Is the first thing Lauren says when Ellie answers the phone a few days later.

“Hello Ellie, how are you? Oh, Hi Lauren, I’m good, thank you for asking.”

“Yes, yes, whatever. Have you told her?”

“We’re already dating.” They never discussed when their ‘relationship’ would end but Ellie’s going to keep the facade going a few weeks just so it doesn’t seem like it was made up.

“Lies.”

“What? No, it’s-”

“Lies.” Lauren singsongs

“Lauren-”

“All liesssss.”

Ellie rolls her eyes in annoyance, giving in easily. She needed to talk to someone about this. “Fine. We aren’t dating but we’re really just friends.”

“Liar.”

“I’m not lying. Jack is my friend.”

“Hmm…ok. How have you both been since the wedding?”

“We’ve been fine.”

“Eleanor.”

“Ok! Wait a minute.” She was sitting in the bullpen and even though Torres and Gibbs were hunting down a lead and McGee was doing a coffee run she was not having this conversation where other agents could overhear. She headed to the lady’s bathroom, checking the stalls to see they were empty. Ellie sighed in relief “You still there?”

“Yes.”

Ellie gulped “We uh kissed and we haven’t really spoken since.” It had been nearly a week since the wedding, and Ellie was avoiding Jack at all costs.

“Well, that’s further than I expected to be honest.” Ellie rolled her eyes “And why haven’t you spoken since?”

“She ran and then texted me telling me she’d had too much to drink and it didn’t mean anything” Ellie muttered.

“And you believed her?” Lauren laughed.

“Yes. No? I don’t know.”

Lauren hums “I’m sending you a photo. Look at it”

Ellie frowns but opens the image, setting her phone to speakerphone so she can still hear Lauren. “Oh” She breathes her voice thick with emotion. She finally understands what Tim meant about ‘wistful looks’. It’s a photo of the two of them when they’d been on the dance floor. Ellie’s head tucked into Jack’s shoulder as Jack holds her tight. Jack’s looking at her like she’s everything, a pained smile on her face. Ellie can’t breathe. “I-I don’t know what to say.”

“Just go get your girl,” Lauren says, and Ellie can practically hear her smirk. Lauren hangs up while Ellie’s still staring at the photo.

 Go get your girl

 Go get your girl

 It rings through her head as Ellie groans loudly. This was probably a terrible idea she sighs. Ellie turns looking into the mirror, fixing her hair before nodding “You’ve got this Bishop”. She exits the bathroom and heads to Jacks office.

The door is open, so Ellie doesn’t bother to knock, instead walking straight in. Jack’s sitting on her couch, looking over paperwork but the second Ellie enters the room her head snaps up. Ellie’s caught off guard, she hadn’t seen Jack yet today but she’s wearing a pink and white suit and it takes away her breath momentarily.

“Ellie?” Jacks voice is full of concern and surprise, she removes her glasses and places them on the folders in front of her. Ellie realises she must look crazy as she paces in front of Jack.

“It was never Torres” Ellie confesses but Jack only looks confused. Ellie stills, taking a deep breath and facing Jack “That I had feelings for…It was never Torres, it was you” Jack gulps but Ellie continues before she can say anything “That’s why I didn’t like Izzy. It’s why I said your name, I wanted, want, it to be you but I was so sure that you’d never feel the same way” Ellie laughs “and then we kissed and it meant everything to me” tears came to her eyes and Ellie could see them forming in Jacks as well. “I can’t just forget about this or move on because I want this, us, so badly” Ellie takes a step forward. Jack just staring at her as tears fall down her face “I have these big messy feelings for you Jack and please, please, tell me you have them for me too.” Ellie finally lets her own tears fall as she releases a shaky breath.

Jack stares at Ellie in shock as she releases an almost inaudible “yes”

“Yes?”

Jack finally stands up then, moving over to stand in front of Ellie. She lightly grasps Ellie’s hand, staring at her in wonderment “Yes. I have big messy feelings for you too” Jack says more confidently this time. Ellie releases a choked laugh as she drops her shoulders in relief. Jack’s fingers lightly brush away a few tears from Ellie’s face, her hand settling on Ellie’s cheek. Jack’s eyes focus on Ellie’s lips “Can I?”

“Please” Ellie moans and then Jack’s leaning over to capture her lips in a kiss. It starts softly this time but quickly becomes hot and heavy and Jack’s hands move to Ellie’s hair as Ellie pulls Jack closer by her blazer before snaking her hands around her waist. Jack tastes just as sweet and addictive as the first time. When Ellie feels her knees begin to buckle, she decides to finally pull away, they stand still in each other’s arms as they try to catch their breaths.

“I’m sorry for running. I thought I really thought you liked Torres” Ellie’s face scrunches up, “I thought I had ruined everything.”

Ellie shakes her head “It’s okay” before placing a soft kiss against Jacks lips “Let me take you on a date?” Ellie questions

“I told you you’d be the one to ask me out” Jack quips and that all it takes for the two to fall into laughter.

#Jack Sloane #Ellie Bishop #Ellie x Jack #Bishop x Sloane #NCIS #Maria Bello #Emily Wickersham #jack sloane x reader #ellie bishop x reader #quishop #Please Enjoy! #feedback always welcome #slishop #jack sloane x ellie bishop

[blackcatkita]

Theme Park Shenanigans

Book- Ride or Die

Pairing- Logan x Ellie

Good clean fun for the ride or die crew at Universal Studios, using prompts (It’s a shame no one asked for your opinion, You’re a prick and We’re not lame, we’re awesome) requested by darley1101 and bobasheebaby. Is it a one-shot or a mini-series? That depends on you, dear reader! What do you think? Do you want to follow them through the park? Word count on this puppy is 2847 and this freaking awesome moodboard was made by darley1101! Enjoy! 

“I vote we go to the Fast and Furious ride first. Once these fools get inside Harry Potter, they’re not gonna leave ‘til the park closes,” Colt suggested, tipping his head in Toby and Ellie’s direction as they all gathered inside the entrance to Universal Studios Hollywood. He chuckled, smirking like the smug butthole he was as he jabbed his thumb toward Logan. “And you know this whipped bitch is gonna do whatever Ellie wants to do. This is probably our only chance.”

“It’s a real shame no one asked your opinion,” Logan said, leaving the group to grab a park map from the display in front of them.

Ximena crossed her arms, scowling at Colt. “Give it a rest, Colt,” she scolded. “We came here to have a good time, not to listen to more of this crap.”

“Shoulda left him home then,” Logan grumbled, looking down at the open map in his hands as he returned to Ellie’s side.

“Aww…” Colt mocked. “Is the white knight afraid he won’t have his little girlfriend’s undivided attention with me around?”

“I’m so glad I brought my own car.” Mona rolled her eyes and walked away to sit on a nearby bench, crossing her legs as she slung her arms casually over the back.

“You really don’t know when to shut up, do you?” Logan shook his head, closing the map and folding it in half before tucking it in the back pocket of his jeans. He kept his voice even, but standing this close, Ellie could feel the tension in his shoulders, anger radiating off him in waves. What Colt said got under his skin, he just wasn’t giving him the satisfaction of reacting.

“No one is forcing you to hang out with us, Colt. Maybe you should go do your own thing while those of us who aren’t here to cause drama do ours.” Ellie glowered at Colt before looking up at Logan with a smile. He smiled back, relaxing as she laced her fingers with his. “Can we check out the gift shop first? I want to get something to show off my house pride.”

“Sure,” Giving her hand a light squeeze, Logan tugged her closer and bent down to kiss the arch of her eyebrow. “I’ll get you whatever you want.”

“Oh my god… this is painful…” Colt grumbled, looking up at the sky before turning away to join Mona on her bench. She shot him a dirty look as he sat down, like he wasn’t invited to the bench party and he scooted to the other end.

“Whatever I want?” Ellie jumped, looping her arms around Logan’s neck. Laughing, he caught her around the waist and held her there, feet dangling as he tilted his head and pressed his lips to hers. Threading her fingers through the short hair on the back of his head, her eyes closed as she melted into the slow and gentle kiss, the noise of the crowded theme park fading away around her.

All too soon he was setting her back on her feet, lips lingering for a brief moment before he pulled away. He smiled, gazing into her eyes as he reached up to trail his thumb across her lip. When he spoke, his voice was soft. “Sorry… couldn’t help myself.”

“It’s okay, that’s what I was going for,” she whispered back, holding onto his shoulders. If she let go her knees would give out and she would hit the deck like a klutz. She knew it.

“Very nice. Excellent form. Ten out of ten,” Toby interrupted in a haughty voice while clapping politely. “What is your ruling, Ximena?”

“I think they’re adorable,” Ximena smiled.

“Our little Logan is growing up!” Toby gushed. “And our little Ellie too! Don’t worry, Ellie, I’ll send you the pictures later.”

“You didn’t…” Blushing, Ellie stepped away from Logan as he cleared his throat and ran his hand through his hair.

“I most certainly did,” Toby admitted, raising his eyebrows with a smile. “And you’re gonna thank me for it. But right now, we need to spend an obscene amount of money on HP merchandise looking for a home. So come on!” Dragging Ximena along with him, Toby bounced away as Logan took Ellie’s hand, the two of them following behind at a slower pace.

Entering the store, Ellie’s eyes swept from side to side, finding it just as magnificent as the last time she had been there with Riya and Darius. Anything you could imagine was on display; from candy and keychains to clothing, wands and a scale model of the Hogwarts Express. Smiling, she opened her arms wide and called out, “I’ll take one of everything!”

“That might be pushing it,” Logan laughed. “But I am ready to do some damage in here.” By the magical treats off to the right, Ximena called out to him and he split off to join her.

Ellie made her way toward the clothing at the back of the store and found Toby staring blankly at the full sets of robes arranged by Hogwart’s house. “Yes, Toby! You have to get some!”

Toby whipped around with wide panicked eyes before turning back to the racks of clothes as quickly as he had to face her. “I don’t know what to do, Ellie!” He let out a frustrated groan, raking his hands through his long black hair. “Do you know how many quizzes I’ve taken to find out what house I am? Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw. Always those two, neither winning out. How is a man supposed to choose?!”

“Whoa. Calm down,” Ellie said, trying not to laugh as she raised her hands in a placating way. “We all share characteristics from different houses. Like me, I’m a Ravenclaw but could also be a Gryffindor. It’s just what you value more.”

“But I value learning and loyalty equally!”

“Ok,” Ellie shrugged. “Then you’re both. You’re a…” Cupping her chin, she tapped her forefinger against her lips as she studied her friend with narrowed eyes. “Ravenpuff.”

“Ravenpuff, I like it,” Toby nodded. “Doesn’t really help me pick which robes I should get though.”

“Get Cedric Diggory’s wand, may he rest in peace, and Ravenclaw robes,” she smirked, shooting him with double finger guns. “Boom.”

“Elena Wheeler,” Toby said seriously. “You, are a genius.” He gave her an enthusiastic high five and turned back to dig through the robes with renewed vigor as Logan walked over.

Coming up behind Ellie, Logan rested his chin on her shoulder as he wrapped his arms around her waist. “Looks like you two are having fun.”

“Toby is having an existential crisis,” she told him, placing her arms over his as she leaned back into his embrace. “He couldn’t decide what house he belonged in.”

“What house do I belong in?”

“Pfft, you’re obviously a Gryffindor.”

“Obviously huh?”

“You might belong in Gryffindor, where dwell the brave at heart,” Toby recited without looking over, too occupied with finding his size among the hangers. “Their daring nerve and chivalry set Gryffindors apart.”

“See?” Ellie asked.

“I’ll take it,” Logan laughed, a deep rumble in his chest against her back. “Are you going to get some of those too?”

Ellie shook her head. “I don’t think so. They’re kind of expensive.”

“So?” Logan asked. “I told you I’d get you whatever you want.”

“You don’t have to do that, Logan.”

“I want to. You’re my girlfriend, Ellie, let me spoil you.” Pressing a kiss to her cheek, he let go and took Toby’s place by the racks. “Ravenclaw, right?”

A beaming smile stretched across her cheeks while her stomach fluttered with butterflies. Girlfriend. He called her his girlfriend. She knew they were together, but it wasn’t that long ago that he’d tried to pull away. She had been hurt; and confused. Left wondering if she ever mattered to him in the first place. He’d more than proved otherwise but she hadn’t realized how much that one little word meant to her, how much she wanted to hear it. “Right,” she answered, walking the few steps over to him. Logan handed her a hanger and she held it up to her shoulders, looking down to see the length. “Too short. They need to swoosh.”

“Right, the swoosh,” Logan teased, taking the hanger and replacing it with another. “This one should work, lots of dramatic swoosh potential.”

Ellie checked the length again. The hem fell right at her ankle, long enough they would have the desired effect but short enough she wouldn’t be tripping over them with every step. She looked up at Logan, giving him a sweet and innocent smile.

“What’s that look for?” Logan asked. “I already told you I’d get them for you.”

“You should get some too…” Ellie suggested, widening her smile.

Logan’s eyebrows floated upward as he huffed out a laugh. “Sorry, babe, that ain’t gonna happen.”

“But… you’re the only Gryffindor we have…” she sighed, tilting her head down a fraction. Pouting, she looked up through her lashes with wide eyes, batting them for good measure. “Please…”

Logan’s eyes narrowed beneath a furrowed brow, lips pursed as he stared back at her. “You don’t play fair. But no matter how cute you are, I’m still not wearing those things in public.”

Ellie giggled, tucking her bottom lip between her teeth. “…in private then?”

A blush spread across his cheeks as his mouth dropped open, hanging there like he lost the ability to speak. “I… umm… if that’s…” he stammered, swallowing hard as he averted his eyes and rubbed the back of his neck. “I mean… I’m not opposed to it necessarily… it’s just, I’ve never… but if you wanted me to I guess I…”

Unable to hold it in any longer, Ellie threw her head back as laughter exploded from her lips.

“You were messing with me,” Logan stated dryly.

“I’m sorry, it was too good to pass up,” Ellie managed through her laughter, eyes watering while clutching her stomach. “Oh man, that was great. You should have seen your face!”

“Yeah, yeah, laugh it up, chuckles.” He tried to look stern as he took the garment from her hands and slung it over his forearm but she could see the smile playing at his lips.

A fit of giggles hit her again and it took a minute before she got ahold of herself. With a deep breath and a happy sigh, she stood up straight, swiping the moisture from beneath her eyes. “Ok, fine, no robes but you need something.” Ellie looked around, turning in a half circle. Her eyes fell on a Gryffindor quidditch jersey and she smiled, pointing at it as she grabbed Logan’s hand to drag him over. “That. That is what you need.”

“…fine,” he relented. “But only because it’s you who’s asking.”

Grinning excitedly, Ellie sifted through the hanging jerseys as Logan waited beside her, laughing and shaking his head. “What?” she asked, looking over her shoulder.

He didn’t answer right away. He just stood there, watching her with a smile so soft it barely tipped the corners of his lips. “Nothing. I like seeing you so happy, that’s all.”

Warmth crept across her cheeks and she turned back to the clothes to hide her blush. It wasn’t just what he said that had her heart racing like a jackrabbit and all kinds of flustered. It was the way he was looking at her. Fond, that was the word. Like she was the only person in the world. Like he… loved her. That couldn’t be true, could it? Why would a guy like Logan love a girl like…

“Need some help there, Troublemaker?”

“Huh?” Ellie asked, startling a bit as her cheeks blazed hotter still. “Uh, no… no I think I got it.” Clearing her throat, she took a shirt down and passed it to Logan without looking at his face. If she did she would only get more flustered and her cheeks felt hot enough, thank you. “This one should fit.” Her own eyes betrayed her, flitting up to meet his gaze.

He gave her a quizzical look as he took the hanger but didn’t say anything; maybe she wasn’t as red as she thought. He held up the shirt, looking down at it with a smile. “Looks good to me. You ready to go?”

“After I get a wand.” Grasping his hand, Ellie tugged him along to the large display of wands near the front of the store. Toby was already there, circling the table and picking up box after box to study while Colt stood nearby, arms crossed and glowering.

“Change your mind about getting something, Colt?” Ellie asked as she and Logan approached.

“Hell no. X has been outside for twenty minutes so I came in here to find out what was taking the rest of you so damn long.” Colt lifted his chin in Toby’s direction. “Turns out this guy needs to touch every wand in this place.”

“The wand chooses the wizard, Colt,” Toby told him, moving to the other side of the table.

Colt rolled his eyes. “Whatever, just hurry up.”

“Colt!” Ellie exclaimed, picking up a wand. “You should get Draco Malfoy’s wand!” She turned to him with a smile, holding it out for him to see.

He stared, deadpan, blinking a few times before responding. “Why would I do that, Ellie?”

“Cause you’re a prick.”

“Because you’re a Slytherin!”

Logan and Ellie spoke at the same time, but it was Logan’s words Colt latched on to.

“Oh, I’m the prick?” Colt made a bitter sound between a laugh and a scoff, lip curled in disgust. “That’s rich coming from you.”

Logan’s brow furrowed before he lifted his shoulder in a half-shrug, shaking his head the tiniest bit. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“I think you know what it means,” Colt glowered. His dark eyes shifted to Ellie’s, narrowing slightly like he was calculating something before he shook his head, the angry expression melting from his face. “Forget it.”

Logan took a step forward, shoving the garments he was holding into Toby’s arms. “If you’ve got something to say to me then say it.”

Colt slowly turned to look at Logan with a twisted smile, chuckling in a way that didn’t sound right. “You really don’t want me to do that, man.”  

Logan stiffened, barely breathing with his hands curled into fists as Colt turned away, swiping a Slytherin keychain off an end cap on his way through the store.

Toby looked between the two guys and from his expression Ellie could tell he was as confused as she was by their little pissing contest. “On that note, I’m gonna go pay for my stuff,” he said. “I’ll see you guys up there.” Giving Logan his and Ellie’s pile back, he followed Colt’s path to the register.

“What was he talking about, Logan?” Ellie asked.

Logan released the breath he’d been holding and shook his head. “Who knows with that guy.” He smiled down at her, reaching up to tuck the hair that had fallen loose from her ponytail behind her ear. “Whose wand are you getting? Hermione’s?”

“Yep!” Ellie exclaimed, turning back to the display. She picked through the pile of Hermione wands, looking at each of them to make sure it was flawless. Satisfied with her choice, she turned to Logan with a smile. “How did you know?”

“It’s only fitting,” Logan grinned, lifting her chin as he bent down to place a soft kiss to her lips. “She’s the brightest witch of her age.”

“Logan Fairchild,” Ellie gasped as she gave his shoulder a smack. “You’re a closet Potterhead!”

Laughing, he took the box from her hand and shot her a wink before walking away.

“Wait! Did you read the books or just watch the movies?” She scurried after him across the store, his long strides making her shorter legs work double time to keep up. “Which one is your favorite? What’s your patronus? Do you ship Harry with Ginny? Severus Snape- good or evil?!”

He didn’t answer her questions and after paying, and a quick stop to the dressing room, Ellie, Logan and Toby walked back out into the sunshine, decked out in their new gear with wands at the ready.

“Wow…” Colt marveled, eyes wide and brows raised as he took in their outfits. “I am genuinely embarrassed for you guys.”

Making a dramatic turn to swoosh the hem of her robes, Ellie lifted her hand with a flourish, pointing her wand at Toby as she shouted, “Expelliarmus!”

“NOOOO!” Toby screamed, throwing his own wand at her with a flick of his wrist.

Ellie snatched it out of the air with her non-dominant left hand and looked at Logan in surprise. “Holy crap! I caught it!”

“God, you guys are so lame,” Mona said, pushing herself off the streetlight she was leaning on.

“We’re not lame!” Ellie cheered, swooping her arm up to point her wand at the sky while pointing Toby’s at Mona. “We’re awesome!”

To be continued?

********************

Tag list will be either in the comments or a reblog because Tumblr is a butt. If you would like to be added/moved/removed please let me know so I don’t bother you with unwanted tags. If you enjoyed this, please like, comment or reblog! I appreciate every single note!

#logan x ellie #logan x mc #choices ride or die #choices rod #playchoices #ride or die fanfic #mercy park crew #mercy park crew shenanigans

[schmweed]

#David Tennant #Alec Hardy #Ellie Miller #Broadchurch #my gifs #Aww! How many other ppl do you think Hardy would get coffee for on his way to a crime scene? #Not many. His Miller and only his Miller on the other hand? You bet he gets her a coffee #So they can stand juuuust at the limit of acceptable personal space and sip their coffees and look out on their crime scene together :) #Amidst of course all the unsaid things on his part and likely unrecognized things on hers. But that can wait. There's a case after all. #And neither of them is going anywhere. What an absolute treat of a season finale 308 was! Thank you Chibnall! #A long silent look at her beaming face then 'See you tomorrow'. Aww! Alec Hardy you hopelessly pining kind-hearted soul you. <3 #She will realize she feels the same way --he just needs to tell her first. I love these two so much!

[writingkeepsmewhole]

Go Down Swinging.

This is the forth part of The Cowboy and The Girl. Sorry for my messed up posting here lately I’m trying to do better. I hope yall like this at least. 

They make it to the capitol but not completely unscathed.

Joel Miller x OC Trish

Warnings: Language, death. 

I would love tag you: @amandamaesweetheart @jodiereedus22 @el-dibidibidorado1

Part 1  Part 3

I walk up the ramp of in the garage some soft of workbench right next to the door.

“Whatcha got?” Joel says standing next to me.

“Thought I would take the  moment to check over everything I got.”

“You mind if I join you?”

I shake my head and smile at him. I pull everything out of my backpack and make a mental note that I need more water.

“Give me that.” Joel says pointing at the pair of pliers next to my hand.

Picking them up I hand them to him curious as why he would need them. Pulling the revolver from his waistband I watch him take it apart and put it back together. I get lost in watching his hands fix the handle.

“Are we gonna go?” Tess asks popping the bubble I was in.

Looking over my shoulder I see her and Ellie standing, waiting on us.

“I’m ready.” I say slinging my backpack over my shoulder.

“We don’t have all day ya know?” She says opening the door next to us and going threw it.

“Well forgive me for wanting to know exactly what I had.”

“You can do that when the job is done.”

I roll my eyes and follow Joel up a fallen floor us going a floor higher. It doesn't take long realize we are in some kind of museum.

“Ooo look dead guys that no one cares about anymore.” I say looking at a large painting of the revolutionary war.

“Who are those guys?” Ellie asks.

“Like she says people no one cares about. Let’s go.” Joel says walking into the next room.

I smile and roll my eyes following the group.

“Aw shit.” Joel says when the wall is caved in.

“No way around?” I ask looking up at him.

“Give me a minute.” He says walking around the corner.

“Over here.”

“Yeah because that’s safe.” I say looking at he hole he is about to crawl in.

“Shut up and just go.” Tess says.

“Yes ma’am.” I say getting on my hands and knees to crawl thru the debris.

“Now what cowboy?” I ask when we reach a large beam blocking the door.

“Watch your heads.”

Huffing he grabs the wooden beam and with a grunt starts to lift it. Pushing down my shock I quickly go under it, it opening up into the other room.

“Hurry, go, go, go!” He says groans Tess and Ellie following me.

“Shit, sonof-.” Joel yells as the clutter over him starts to cave in.

“Joel!” I scream spinning around trying to see him.

“I’m alive.” He calls back coughing.

“I’ll make my way around you.”

“Look they're here!” Tess yells clicking noises coming from the hallway.

“Trish?” I hear Joel yell but I don’t have time to answer having to run from the infected chasing us.

I follow Ellie and Tess hoping Joel makes it out okay.

“Up here.” Tess says running up the steps.

“Go ahead I’ll catch up.” I tell her grabbing the bottle from my backpack.

“What are you doing?” She asks me glaring.

“Covering your ass now go.” I say hearing the infected climb the steps.

Lighting the rag I look over my shoulder at them standing at the top of the stairs.

“Go!” I yell throwing the bottle in front of me just as I see the first clicker.

I don’t look back as I hear them run away from me. I walk up the steps backwards shooting what infected get threw the flames alive when my gun clicks I have to resit the urge to throw it.

Spinning around I start running down the hall having no idea where anyone is but I couldn’t think about that. I had to get somewhere safe.

Hearing banging and pops of gun shots I follow the noise it leading to Joel and Tess fighting infected. When I hear Ellie scream I go into the next room a runner trying to bite her.

Knowing I was out of ammo I tackle it to the floor and stab it in the head.

“Holy shit Trish.” Ellie says as I stand up.

“You okay?” I ask her.

I gasp when Joel grabs my arm around roughly spins me to face him. “The hell was that?” He asks angry in his eyes and voice.

“I’m outta bullets.” I say jerking my arm out of his grip.

“You could have gotten infected.”

“I didn’t I’m fine.”

“Your gonna get your damn self killed one day.” He barks angry building up inside me.

“Well then you’ll be free of me won’t you be happy.” I snap back quickly spinning and walking away from him.

I climb out of the window onto the fire escape and head up to the roof it too far to drop down.

“You okay?” Joel asks behind me.

I don’t respond knowing he ain’t talking to me.

“Divine okay.” Ellie says.

“Are you still breathing?”

“Do small panic breaths count?” She asks walking onto the roof with me.

“Yeah they count.” I say looking at her.

“Alright. Well I’m okay.”

“There she is. That’s our building.” Tess says pointing at the capitol building.

“We’re closer.” I say looking at it the low in the sky.

It would be dark soon that wasn’t a good thing anywhere.

“We need a way over to that building.”

“Stand back.” Joel says walking up behind us.

I move out of the way him putting a long plank from one roof to the other.

“Because that’s safe…” I say looking over the edge.

I hold my hands up when Joel shoots me a glare a smile on my face. Ellie walks past me up to the side of the building.

“Watch your step as you’re going up because it’s gonna be a little-.”

“Pssh.” Ellie says cutting him off and walking across the plank.

I giggle following after her the bored creaking under my feet but I try not to think about it.

“Well is that everything you hoped for?” Joel asks walking up behind us.

I look up at him then out at the sun setting over the city buildings. The blue sky fading to purple and pink making the capital’s building roof more noticeable.

“Jury's still out.” Ellie says.

“But man… You can’t deny that view.”

“You got that right.” I say smiling at her.

“Come on this way.” Tess says walking towards the ladder.

“Don’t wanna stop and enjoy the moment Tess?” I ask not moving from standing next to Joel.

“No. We need to move.”

“Fine be that way.”

“You could get the stick out your ass and enjoy yourself for once.” I say throwing my leg over the side of the roof and starting to climb down.

My heart picking up at the feeling of thinking I was going to fall. The empty air behind me very real in my mind. The wobbling ladder not helping my nerves.

Once at the bottom I take a breath.

“You okay?” Ellie asks me.

“Oh I’m good. Just going down ladders or walking backwards makes me on edge for some reason.” I say as Tess and Joel join us on the ground.

“Right around this corner. C’mon.” Tess says gestering to the steps.

“After you.” I say waving her on.

“Are you guys always like this?” Ellie asks as we walk down the steps.

“I guess. It’s the way it’s always been. I was the last to the party we call our friendship. I guess I take some getting used to.”

“You said you knew them for five years.”

“Joel for five. Tess for three they got separated-.”

“Look at this.” Joel calls cutting me off.

I spin around to see him standing in the corner of the alley way we are standing in at the bottom of the stairs. A dead body at his feet.

“There's a firefly logo on his arm.” Ellie says.

“Man this people are dropping like flies.” I say grinning.

“What?” I ask when everyone turns to look at me but no one laughs.

“Was the joke that bad?”

“Trish as a point though. What if when we get there and they're all dead?”

“They won’t be.” Tess says as Joel finishes searching the body.

He stands up and hands me three throwing knives.

“Ooo toys thank you.” I say smiling up at him. My stomach flipping when his fingers brush mine.

He nods and walks away.

“How do you know that?”

“I just do.” Tess snaps earning a raised eyebrow from me.

She takes a breath and  turns towards the wall.

“It’s gonna be fine.” She says making me feel like she was saying it more to herself then Ellie.

“What are you doing?” I ask walking away from them watching Joel drag a dumpster.

He doesn't answer him pulling it to a locked gated I didn’t even know was there.

“Up and over.” He says climbing on top of it.

“First a tightrope now we get tetanus.” I say climbing up next to him.

He snorts and vaults over the gate.

“We risk our lives trying to get around stuff more than we do fighting the infected.”

“Well something's gotta keep you on your toes.”

“Yeah but-.” I vault over the gate Joel surprising me when he catches me on the other side.

One good thing about him being twice the size as me. My stomach flutters his fingers brushing over it as he balances me.

“But what?” He asks when he lets go.

“Nothing was just gonna say something about people should have cleaned up their crap.” I say waving him off as Tess drops down next to us followed by Ellie.

“Home stretch Tess.” Joel says as we start walking towards the capitol building it completely visible now.

“Yeah.” She says jogging to it.

“I don’t believe in cardio.” I say jogging behind Joel us coming to the marsh in front of the building.

The water deep enough to almost over a car.

“Um.. just so it’s out there I can’t swim.”

“It looks like it’s shallow on the right side follow me.” Tess says walking into the water.

“This is gonna be so nasty.” I say wadding into the swampy water.

“I was right.” I say holding my hands up it slimy and wet.

“Are you okay?” Joel asks looking at me us walking next to each other.

“The water is green. We are walking in Shrek’s backyard. Of course i’m not okay.”

“Who is Shrek?” Ellie asks.

“It was a movie about an ogre.”

“A what?”

“An ogre-.”

“You can tell her later.” Tess says as we reach the steps leading to the capitol building doors.

“I’m glad Marlene hired you guys.” Ellie says before I can reply.

“What do you mean?” Tess says.

“I know you guys are getting paid for this but- I’m trying to say thanks.”

“Aww you are so welcome.” I say smiling at her.

“Yeah sure thing.” Tess says us reaching the door no longer in water put still wet.

“Ah shit.” Joel says as he opens the door.

“No.” Tess says pushing past him to the dead men on the floor.

“What happens now?” Ellie asks Joel closing the door behind her.

“Take you back to Marlene I guess.” I say shrugging.

“What are you doing, Tess?” Joel asks walking up to her searching the bodies.

“Maybe they uh, maybe they had a map or something to tell us where they were going.” She says frantically patting them down.

“How far are we gonna take this?”

“As far as it needs to go.” She says looking up at him then at Ellie.

“Where was this lab of theirs?”

“She never said.” Ellie says shrugging.

“She only said it was some place out west.”

“Well that’s vague.”

“What are we doing here?” Joel asks.

“This is not us.”

“Oh, what do you know about us?” Tess snaps her standing up.

“About me? We, you haven't been the same since she showed up.” Tess says jerking her chin in my direction.

I hold my hands up and take a step back not wanting to fight.

“I know that you are smarter than this.” Joel says stepping to stand in front of her.

“Really? Guess what, were shitty people Joel it’s been that way for a long time.”

“No, we are survivors!”

“This is our chance.”

“It is over, Tess!” Joel yells making me jump and Tess shut up.

“We tried. Now let’s just go home.” He says sighing.

“I’m not… I’m not going anywhere.” Tess says.

“This is my last stop.” Her voice cracking.

“What?” I ask her turning away from us all.

“Out luck had to run out sooner or later.”

“What are you going on about?” Joel asks grabbing her arm her jerking away from him.

“No, don’t-. Don’t touch me.” She says taking a step away from him.

“Oh no…” I whisper the light bulb going off in my head.

“Holy shit.” Ellie says making Joel look over at us.

“She’s infected.”

I watch the blood leave Joel’s face him taking a step away from her.

“Joel…” Tess says softly.

“Let me see.” He says.

“I didn’t mean-.”

“Show it to me.” He demands.

I clench my fist my heart pounding. It stopping when she pulls the color of her shirt over a large angry red and pus bite on her collarbone.

“Oh, Christ.” Joel chokes out shock on his face.

“Oops right?” She asks as he takes another step back her hand falling to her side.

“Give me your arm.” She asks marching over to Ellie.

“This was three weeks.” She says after jerking Ellie’s sleeve up and pointing at the bite on her arm.

“I was bitten an hour ago and it’s already worse.” She says dragging Ellie with her to Joel.

“This is fucking real.”

“You've got to get this girl to Tommy’s.” She says talking about Joel’s brother.

“He used to run with this crew, he’ll know where to go.”

“No, no, no, that was your crusade.” Joel says pointing at her as he backs up.

“I am not doing that.”

“Yes you are. Look there is enough here that you have to feel some obligation to me. Despite everything that has happened. So you get her to Tommy’s.”

We all jump at the sound of a truck. I spin around to look at the doors.

“Shit!” Joel says as Tess runs to the door.

“They’re here.” She says pulling her gun out.

“Damnit.”

“I can buy you some time but you have  to run.” She says walking back over to us.

“What?” Ellie asks surprised.

“You want us to just leave you here?”

“Yes, she dose.” I say Tess looking up at me.

“I would want the same thing.”

“There is no way-.” Joel says answering me.

“I will not turn into one of those things.” She says cutting him off.

“Come on. Make this easy for me.” She begs.

“I can fight-”

“No.” I say it my turn to cut him off.

“We go she stays.” I say walking up to him and grabbing his forearm.

“We don’t have time to argue and I’m not about to lose two friends today.” I say meeting his eyes

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for this.” Ellie says.

“Ellie get a move on.” Joel says backing away from me and turning for the door.

Turning back to look at Tess I call her name.

“Go down swinging.” I say winking at her.

She takes a breath nodding she smiles turning away from me.

I do the same following Joel into the next room my gut full of bricks knowing nothing will ever be the same.

#the last of us imagine #the last of us fanfiction #the last of us fanfic #the last of us joel #the last of us #joel fanfic #joel fanfiction #joel fic #joel imagine #joel x y/n #joel x oc #Joel X you #joel x reader #joel miller fanfic #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x reader #joel miller imagine #joel miller x y/n #joel miller x Oc #Joel Miller #joel #tlou joel #tlou fanfic #tlou fanfiction #tlou fic #tlou imagine #the cowboy and the girl #go down swinging

[wrenwritesometimes]

Stitches

A/N: This was just a... a spark of an idea; not a challenge entry for once! Thanks once again and always to @imnoaingeal​ for reading through it!! ♥️

I love Dad!Dean, and I've written now two things of him being a dad... so! Give me feedback if you want another one! 

Warnings: Fluff, cussing, mentions of stitches. Obviously! 😆

(Couldn't find a gif of Dean with a black eye other than the demon eyes, so I gave the fuck up... 😂)

Up, down… left, right.

Up, down… left, right.

Up down… left right…

Slowing down… Wake up.

Up, down; left, right.

You felt your eyes droop again, but you tried your best to keep them open as you ran your (now) numb fingertips over your little girl’s back.

She had fallen asleep hours ago, and half of your torso was numb and tingly from lack of movement, and don't get me started on your left arm - but you didn't have the heart to wake her up before her daddy got back.

You had collected her thick hair (a trait from the Grecian God Dean himself) into a little ponytail, and it was soft enough to bring your consciousness back.

You ran your fingers lightly over her hair and tucked your nose gently against her neck; inhaling.

She never let you do that when she was awake anymore; only her dad. She said it tickled more when you did it, even though Dean had about 150% more scruff than you did, you were certain...

Shaking your head, you closed your eyes, smiling into her neck. She was crazy.

You hesitantly maneuvered your legs out from under you and grunted lightly as your knees popped. Mary Ellen was a heavy sleeper… she didn't react as you readjusted her position against your chest.

In the distance of the bunker, you heard a sound. Your eyes drew from your lap and you looked in the direction of the garage.

Smiling, you subconsciously patted Ellen’s back.

“Daddy’s home,” you murmur, and immediately Ellen was roused and blearily blinking up at you.

She was limp upon you, her arms still hanging down loosely against your abdomen. She turned her head and buried her forehead in your neck, mumbling nonsense.

“Hm?”

“How-mhow’s mmmheeere…”

Your eyebrows furrowed and you stifled a laugh.

“Baby, you're still asleep… you're speaking in Dreamese.”

Ellen had a tendency to not form coherent sentences immediately after she woke up. It was understandable; your mother said you were the same.

It felt better to call the gibberish something else, than make her feel bad for being disoriented.

“Mmmm…” Ellen hummed, the vibration tickling. “How's he get here?”

You started tickling her back. “How he always does, baby; Baby.” Ellen giggled softly.

“I want daddy,” she whined softly.

“I know you do. The second he and Unca Sam get in, he'll take ya to bed, okay kiddo?”

She nodded against your clavicle.

You heard a closer sound and let out a relieved breath when you saw Sam enter and place a box casually upon the Library’s table. “Hey, Y/N,” he called out softly, eyeing you and his niece with a soft smile.

“Heya, Sammy,” you called back. “Where’s Deano?”

Sam gave you a look, but replied, nodding off towards one of the bathrooms. “Comin’.”

Your face felt heavy and you had to resist getting up. You wanted to give Ellen to Sammy and go help Dean clean up…

The moment you decided to do that, you felt a body join you on the couch, melting into your side, sighing blissfully.

“Daddy!?” You exclaimed softly, in a tone suited for Ellen to wake up excited for. Ellen’s head shot up from your neck, narrowly missing your chin. “Daaaddy!” she cooed, reaching for him.

He raised his head and gathered his daughter to rest under his chin. “Aww, heey there, half-pint…” his eyes met yours.

Your brow furrowed and your lips pulled back in a worrying grimace. His eye was nearly swollen shut and black and blue.

Dean shook his head subtly and beckoned you to enter his embrace. Leaving a deft kiss upon the area below his eye, you curled into his side and rested your head against the other side of his neck, inhaling deeply.

Dean’s arm was curled from your neck to your shoulder and he held you in a firm embrace, his eyes closing as he held his girls.

“Hey, Y/N,” Sam called softly. “Is your sister here?”

You nodded, but opened your heavy eyes when you realized he couldn't see you. “Yeah, she's in your room, Sammy.”

You could sense the beam from Sam as he went off to have his own, albeit more private, “moment”.

Dean chortled quickly. “He's gonna bang your sister…”

You thumped his chest, giggling. “Shut the eff up, Dean.”

Suddenly, both Ellen and Dean’s heads were perked up. For different reasons, however. In unison, they scolded, “Heeey!” “Language, honey!” Dean harped on, grinning like an idiot, despite his swollen eye. “Tha's bad werd!” Mary Ellen shouted above her father, her expression offended; beside herself her mother cussed.   “Damn right,” Dean nodded approvingly, beaming at you like a kid getting his sibling in trouble. “It's a ‘bad werd’!”

Guffawing, you threw your free hand up in surrender. “Fine, fine! I'm sorry!”

Ellen yawned and looked at her dad, grabbing his jaw in her small hands. She gasped, inspecting her dad’s eye. “Daaaaddy!” she shouted. 

Dean shushed her.

“Daaddy…” she said again, madder but quieter. “Wha’d happen’d?”

Dean looked to you, smirking slightly. He looked back to Ellie. “Well, sweetheart, I was helpin’ a nice lady get away from a bad guy.”

“A mon’ser?”

“Mm-nm,” he shook his head, “Jus’ a normal guy.”

“A guy like you?”  

“Mm-hm,” he nodded exaggeratedly, getting up to go to her bedroom. He grabbed your hand and intertwined his fingers through yours. “A real bad guy that we thought was a monster.”

“You and Unca Sam?”

“Mm-hm.”

“Wha’d happen?”

“This bad guy, he was usin’ ladies for bad things… we thought he was a monster, but he turned out not to be.”

“You said that.”

“Goddamn it…” he mumbled. After a split moment of looking truly frustrated and distressed, he looked up and back to you dramatically. “It's becoming self aware, Y/N!”

“Oh no!” You responded just as dramatically, catching on. “We’re gonna hafta put it down!!”

Mary Ellen started giggling and thumping her legs against her dad’s stomach, leaning her torso away from his body.

“Woh there!” He had a good enough grip on her hips, but his hand left yours to stabilize her before he dropped her. “Careful, baby girl!”

“You wud’n’t drop me,” she retorted, stubbornly leaning away still.

Dean reached her door.

“Never would I ever,” he said with a resolute nod. “Scout’s honor.” He crossed his heart and held up his right hand. Ellie high-fived it and beamed.

“Let's get you to sleep, Starship.”

“You did not nickname our spawn after those creepy freaks, Dean…” you mumbled to yourself, grinning.

“It's special to me!” he defended laughingly, having heard you.

“Dean…” you giggled.

“I'm not conceding,” he shot back, grinning.

You stared at him for a long moment, a serene smile creeping up onto your face and you closed your eyes as you laughed at him.

“I love you,” you murmur.

“I know,” he responded humbly, his face solemn but happy. He leaned over, tipping on one leg to kiss you straight on the mouth.

He then turned and interacted with his little girl, getting her ready to go to sleep.

You leaned silently in the doorway, watching him undo her ponytail and run his calloused fingers through her hair… you watched him tuck her in and tuck in her stuffed animal, and get her favorite book and read her favorite part; the part that made her go to sleep instantly.

He stayed perched on her bed for a few minutes, just watching her breathe, tucking loose hair away from her face… you heard him murmur, “Mary Ellen Winchester, you are beautiful…”

He ran a hand over his face, leaning his chin against his palm for a full minute.

He put her book on her nightstand and clicked off her light, groaning as he got up.

As he walked back to you, you noticed a limp that wasn't there before.

Immediately you offered your hand. He took it as soon as he was close enough.

You closed Ellie’s door softly before Dean wrapped you in his arms.

You both stood there, just holding each other for a few minutes.

Sighing, Dean lifted his face from your shoulder slightly. “My ribs hurt and I definitely need stitches on my leg,” he mumbled into your ear.

Nodding silently, you took his hand and lead him to the closest bathroom.

You knelt at his knees and washed his wound with a peroxide-soaked rag.

His eye was opening up fine, so you only focused on the gash on his right thigh.

“So, it wasn't an incubus?” You questioned softly.

“Nope,” he grunted, taking a small swig of whiskey. “Was just some fucking pervert…” Another swig. “Just a fucking pervert who knew his lore.”

You nodded solemnly, your brow furrowed as you focused on cleaning his leg.

“How'd you get nicked?” you asked softly, and sarcastically. It was a fairly long and deep gash.

“Fucker had scythe,” he said flatly.

You snorted. “Are you shitting me?”

“He had the lore,” Dean said between sips. “Half of it wasn't that accurate.”

“So, he was just some pervert with a scythe…” you went back to dabbing the tag on his leg.  

Dean was uncharacteristically silent, so you looked up. He looked miserable.

“Dean?”

He shook his head like he was snapped from a trance and his eyes bored into yours. He looked sad.

“This fucker was about to get the jump on a little girl and her mom.”

You nodded, brows furrowed.

“Sam had done some digging in his personal journals - since we found out where he lived before we found out where he was…”

You nodded distractedly as you blotted the wound. It kept bleeding.

“He was gonna try out the little girl.”

You halted all movement and stared, dumbfounded, into Dean’s eyes. He nodded at your disbelief and took a longer pull from the bottle of whiskey.

“Then I got to thinkin’...” he sniffed. “If that was my baby? That he was gonna do all that shit to? I'd fucking murder him.”

You gripped his knee, feeling dizzy.

“So I did.”

You looked up at him. For a brief moment, you just stared at him. You spread his legs gently and embraced his waist as tight as you could, your eyes tearing up. “Your baby’s lucky she has you, Dean,” you mumbled, your voice thick with emotion as you spoke into his stomach.

Dean sighed heavily, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder blades. “Not really…”

You took the whiskey from him. He always got self-doubty when he was drinking.

“I need that…” he said softly, staring at the bottle.

“No, you need to stop,” you shot back softer, going back to prepping his leg. “You need to stop talking like that, especially after seeing first hand how much your little girl needs and loves you.” You were ranting, your eyes not lifting to Dean’s as you readied the stitching supplies.

You disinfected the needle.

“You are an amazing father to her, and every time you say you aren't, you're only hurting yourself.”

You carefully began working on the layer of tissue below his skin. It was a deep cut.

“She never shuts up about you, and it's because you're her superhero, Dean.”

Eight… nine… ten…

“It literally never ceases to amaze me how, despite how much love you receive from one goddamn peanut of a human, you still think that she doesn't need you.”

Twenty-one… twenty-two… twenty-three…

“Y/N--”

“She loves you...”

Thirty-five… thirty-six… thirty-seven…

“I love you…”

Forty-eight… forty-nine… fifty…

“You need to stop with that whole ‘she deserves better’ trope, Dean,” you looked up into his eyes, seeing them glisten. You softened. “Or I'll shoot you myself.”

Dean gently grabbed your hand, halting your actions.

“Look…” he began softly. “I know I don't ever really… say it back, but--”

You interrupted him with a soft kiss.

“I know.”

“But I--”

You interrupted him again with another kiss; a longer one.

“You don't need to say it, I know.”

He kissed you. “But I feel like I shou--”

You kissed him, holding his jaw with your one clean and free hand. “Just keep coming back home to me. That’s how I do - and always will - know.”

Dean’s gaze was heavy and humble, his face serious and glowing at the same time. You smiled softly and sneaked a kiss to the tip of his nose. “I love you,” you murmur. “I know,” he whispers.

Tags:

@notnaturalanahi, (tenitively)@winchesters-favorite-girl

#Dean Winchester x Reader #Dad!Dean #Dad!Dean Winchester x Mom!Reader #SPN #SPN Family #Implied Sam x Reader's Sister #Cute #Just Cute #I needed happy ideas #found one

[davidcarner]

Chuck vs the Nanny Ch 2

After this, you’re caught up

Disclaimer:  I don’t own Chuck…but I think it owns a piece of me (aww) enough, on to the story.

____ 

“You remember everything?” Chuck asked.  Sarah had a huge smile on her face, and it started to dim.  Ellie held her lip between her teeth.  Chuck tried to remain calm on the outside, but inside he was breaking.  He didn’t want to ask what he was thinking but he had to know.  “Okay, do you remember everything the last six years?”  Sarah looked at him and smiled.

“Every bit of it.” She said calmly.  Chuck nodded, and let out a breath he wasn’t even aware he was holding.

“Okay, what about our wedding?”  Sarah shook her head, Chuck nodded, and gave her a reassuring smile.  “Me uploading the Intersect here in Castle with Ellie?”  Sarah smiled and nodded.

“Yes, I remember that!”

“Our first date?” he asked hopefully.  Sarah made a wincing face, and shook her head regretfully.

“Parts,” she said.  Chuck brightened and stood up straighter.  “I remember you saying you were terrific or amazing and I said you were,” she said smiling.  Chuck had a tight smile that he was losing.  “Not the first date?”

“Our real first date, but you said it was our second date, and I thought it was our second first date…”

“Bartowski!” Casey yelled.

“Right, spiraling.”  Sarah couldn’t help but smile.  

“I’m sorry,” Ellie said.  “Without a base for the Intersect to latch onto, the upgrade won’t hold for a lack of a better way to explain it.”  She turned and looked at Samantha.  “Since she was born with something…” She looked at Chuck and Sarah expectantly, not sure what to say.

“Samantha,” Sarah said.  Her daughter looked up at her.  “Do you think you and I could do some Kung Fu sparing?”  Samantha nodded.  “Do you know what non-lethal means?”

“Mommy, I would never kill you,” Samantha said sagely. Chuck and Sarah turned towards each other and smiled.  

“Wow, Bartowski, now all the women in your life can kick your butt,” Casey leaned in and whispered.  Gertrude grabbed him from behind and pulled him back.

“Keep it up, John, and I’ll show you what the woman in yours can do.”  Chuck beamed at Gertrude.  Sarah took Samantha’s hand and led them to the sparing area as everyone watched.

“Wow! Samantha’s gonna beat up my Mom!” Stephen told Beckman.

“Don’t you want to be closer to the action, young man?” Beckman said, a little uncomfortable.

“Nope, they both listen to you, and this could get bad.”  Beckman couldn’t help but agree with the young man.  Here was a three year old with all the knowledge of the Intersect. She said she could be non-lethal, but what did she really know about that?

“Flash and come at me,” Sarah said.  Samantha gave her a confused look.

“Mother, I don’t flash.  I dazzle people.”

“Dazzle?” Samantha nodded, “Well, come dazzle me.”

“I think zoom is better than that,” Chuck whispered to Morgan.

“Thank you!  And, of course, flash, is the OG.  You know both of ours at least had Flash references.”  It then dawned on Morgan, and he lightly tapped Chuck with the back of his hand.  “We should have known I was going evil, because I said Zoom.”  Chuck caught the reference and nodded.  That’s when they noticed everyone watching them.

“Are you two retired hens about done, because the real women in the room are going to show us how to fight,” Casey said, proud of himself.  He then saw Gertrude.  “Of course, you’re a real woman too,” he added quickly and started to turn around. Chuck and Morgan took the mature route and stuck their tongues out at Casey.  Casey grunted and everyone turned toward Sarah and Samantha.  Samantha’s eyes quickly flickered, and suddenly she came at Sarah.  The two fought for barely a minute.  Sarah was sweating from the strenuous workout, barely able to keep up with her daughter, while Samantha seemed calm with every one of her moves.  Chuck began to think Sarah was going to lose when Samantha stopped, and bowed.

“Is that sufficient, Mother?”  Chuck looked at Beckman, whose eyes were huge.  She looked at Chuck, and Chuck shook his head. There was no way his daughter was doing anything CIA related.  Beckman gave a short crisp nod to agree with him and Chuck returned a grateful smile.

“That was great, Honey,” Sarah said.  Samantha hugged her mother in joy, and Sarah knew deep down they would be okay.  “General, I’m in.”

“Me too,” Chuck said.

“We all are,” Casey grunted.  

“Very well,” Beckman said.  “When Jason gets here, we’ll go over the plan.  This has been an interesting day.”  With that she walked out of the room.

“Dude, your entire family is just awesome!” Devon said, coming up behind Chuck.  Chuck smiled, and turned toward him, but the smile died some.  

“I just want them to be normal,” Chuck said, looking over at his wife and children.

}o{

6 years ago

Chuck hadn’t exactly lied to Sarah, but he needed some time to himself.  Sarah had taken control of Castle, and she was everywhere in the apartment, which was great, because she was starting to act like it was her home, but there was nowhere for Chuck to go to think.  Chuck found himself back at his house….the one that was supposed to be Sarah’s dream house that Chuck had fallen in love with.  He had bought it the day after he saw her at the beach.  He didn’t know why he didn’t move in…he did, he wasn’t ready yet. He didn’t know why he hadn’t told Sarah…he did, it was too much, and he wasn’t sure how she’d take it.  He didn’t know why this place had become home…he did, it was a possible future that he wanted with all his heart.  Even knowing it was only possible, and not necessarily even probable, made him happy.  He came here to think through big decisions.  Since Sarah had come back to Carmichael Industries, things were going smoothly, especially since he always agreed with Sarah.  Today…today he didn’t agree and he didn’t know how to tell her. The job she thought they should take, he thought it was too dangerous, and he didn’t know how to tell her without hurting her.  He worried it would open them up personally, and while right now, it was just him and her, he couldn’t chance the future.  He sighed, sitting on the steps that lead upstairs.  He should really tell Sarah where he was he was thinking, as his phone rang.

“Hey,” came the voice over the phone that always made his heart swell with love.  “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, everything’s fine…unless there’s something I don’t know about.”  There was a pause.

“Chuck,” she paused, took a deep breath, and continued. “You went quiet today.”

“Just thinking.”

“Uh-huh,” she said and he knew she knew.  She didn’t have memories!  How could she know?  “Chuck, you talk about everything.”

“Not everything,” he said, a little whiney. There was silence.  “I mean really, you’ve only remember the past month, how is it you know this?”

“It’s love memory,” she said softly.

“Love memory?” he snorted.  

“Yeah, it’s like muscle memory with your heart, you nerd,” she shot back, but Chuck could feel the smile through the phone.

“Oh, so it has nothing to do with the fact your one of the greatest spies on the planet?”  There was a pause from the other end.

“Maybe,” she admitted.  “Are you coming home soon, or are you going to sit in that empty house all day?”  Chuck sputtered and she had a soft laugh.  Chuck didn’t know what to say.  “I followed you when you left all quiet and when I realized where you were going I followed a hunch and I pulled the records.  You bought it the day after I left.  You didn’t tell me because you thought it would be too much pressure, right?”

“You never cease to amaze me.”

“You never cease to amaze me,” she replied. “Now am I coming over there, or are you coming over here so we can talk about you keeping secrets when you’re not supposed to and what’s bothering you?”

“I’m coming home.”

“Chuck,” Sarah said just above a whisper.  “Home is wherever you are.”  Chuck nearly dropped the phone.  He gathered himself and then spoke the best he could without his voice breaking.

“I’m coming to the apartment.  There’s something we need to talk about, and I’ve got to be honest with you.”

“That’s all I ever asked,” she said, and paused. “I love you.”  And the line was silent.  Chuck ran to his car.

}o{

Now

The doorbell rang at the Bartowski house.

“I’ll get it,” Stephen bellowed.  

“Maybe you shouldn’t and let one of the adults until this whole thing is over, Ace,” Chuck said to the boy.  

“Aww, Dad, but I know kung-fu!”  He began to come at his father with the moves Morgan had taught him.  

“And, while that is awesome, maybe we should keep that as our secret weapon,” Chuck said winking.  His son winked back, and tore off to another part of the house. Chuck shook his head and opened the door.  Sarah came into the living room just as Chuck opened the door.  He saw Beckman and who he could only assume was Jason Black. Chuck thought the picture didn’t do the man justice.  He looked even better if that was possible.  Chuck glanced back at his wife who was taking him in, she raised her eyebrows in appreciation when she caught Chuck’s glance.  She gave him a look that said, “Don’t be stupid, you know I only love you,” and Chuck couldn’t help but smile.

“I don’t mean to interrupt, but Jason just arrived and I wanted him to become familiar with the children and the house,” Beckman said.

“Please, come in,” Chuck said, a little upset with himself for not inviting them in quicker.  “Does Jason need to move in?”  Beckman glanced at Jason as they entered the house.

“That’s totally up to you,” he answered.  Chuck shook his head and his wife prayed he didn’t say what was in his head.

“Even your voice sounds incredible,” Chuck heard himself say, and he squeezed his eyes shut, realizing how that sounded.

“Well, thank you,” Jason said, grinning.  Sarah rolled her eyes.

“There’s a guest room upstairs if you wish to stay and think it best,” she said.  Jason looked at her, nodded, and then he turned back to Chuck.

“I will make sure your children are safe.”

“Thank you,” Chuck replied, grinning.  “Let me show you to your room.”  As Chuck took Jason upstairs, Sarah walked over to Beckman.

“General, how bad is this?”  Beckman looked at the younger woman, and sighed.

“I don’t know,” she admitted.  “And, that’s what scares me.”  Sarah nodded.

“I’m sorry you had to come out of retirement for this.”  Beckman smiled.

“I’m not, I’ve been on the sidelines too long.”

“Roan fell the same way?”  Beckman studied Sarah’s face for a moment.  

“I have no idea,” Beckman answered.  She walked to the door, opened it, and turned back to Sarah, seemingly unsure of herself.  “Keep an eye on him.”  Sarah smiled.

“General, I’ve been fighting off men’s advances for years.”

“Not, Jason, Chuck.”  Sarah gave her a look.

“Oh.”

“Black is one of the best in the business but he’s here for the children.  I need the best to watch him.”  Sarah smiled. Beckman started to leave, paused, and turned back to Sarah.

“Trust your family, those blood and not.”  Sarah started to answer when Chuck and Jason came downstairs laughing.

“Sarah, I think this is going to work out great,” Chuck said.

“That’s great Chuck,” she said going over and sliding her arm around him.  

“I think we’re going to be fine.”  Beckman and Sarah glanced at each other.

“I know you’ll do whatever is necessary for our family, now and in the future,” she said, looking at Black.  Jason excused himself to go clean up and unpack while Beckman left without another word.  Chuck was oblivious to everything going on, because he was thinking about the first time that he and Sarah finally approach the subject of the future.

}o{

6 years ago

Chuck entered the apartment, not sure what to say to Sarah.  She was sitting on the couch drinking a glass of wine, with a knowing smile on her face.

“I should have told you,” Chuck began, but stopped at the smile on her face.

“Come on, Chuck,” Sarah began, still grinning. “You know how long it would have took you to explain it.  I get it. I don’t like it, but I get it.” She pointed a finger at him.  “No more secrets.”

“No matter how much they hurt?” The smile left Sarah’s face.  She nodded.

“No matter how much they hurt.  You need to tell me what is bothering you.”

“Can I explain first?”  Sarah grinned.

“I’d expect nothing less.”  Chuck smiled and sit on the other side of the couch, purposely creating a space between them.  Sarah shook her head, got up, and sat down right beside him, seated where she was looking right at him.  Chuck reached out tentatively, and Sarah gave him her hand.

“Here’s the horrible truth, you don’t remember the last five years and how much you changed.”  Sarah nodded.  “But, that’s not exactly true.  See, what I learned over five years is you were already changing, you saved the baby, now your sister.  You were already thinking of leaving the CIA, and I think being with me, you thought about life after the CIA.”  Sarah nodded. “Love is not something you can control, and there’s one thing I know about you is you hate surprises and love control.”  Sarah smiled, knowing he was right.  “Here’s what’s already different.  The first year, you never let me know how you felt, until you thought we were going to die, and you kissed me.”  Sarah thought for a second, she looked down at the ground, and her face contorted a little, and then her head snapped back up, surprise on her face.

“And pulled a gun on you and threatened to kill you,” she said, trailing off.  Chuck grinned.

“I was being a bit of a stubborn jerk.” Sarah smiled softly.

“I don’t know about being a jerk, but when it comes to me you can be a bit stubborn, and I’m glad you are.”  Chuck smiled.  “So what does this have to do with today?”  Chuck nodded.

“Hang on, I’m getting there.”  Sarah rolled her eyes, grinning.  “So, now, the ‘Chuck shield’ is gone.”

“The ‘Chuck shield’?” Sarah asked, using air quotes.

“Yeah, the ‘I’m not going to let him see how I really feel’ mask you put on.”  Sarah gave him a level look.

“Oh, really?  I mean, it’s not like I sit around making goo-goo eyes at you all day,” she said, with a very confident look on her face.  Chuck fought a smile, and the confident look slowly fell off her face.  “No, I don’t.”  Chuck glanced at the remote control on the table, and looked back at her, fighting, unsuccessfully, the smile that threatened to consume his face.  

“I know what to look for now,” he said softly. “You and Casey trained me in some things about reading people.”  Sarah scoffed.

“I’m not,” she began, but Chuck reached down, grabbed the remote, and stopped.

“I bet in 20 minutes I can find five times on the castle footage that we run of you pushing your hair back over your ear, or glances when you think I’m not looking, or other little things that you and Casey taught me to look for.  Do you really want me to go looking?”  Sarah stared at him, trying to look irritated, but she slowly began to blush and Chuck’s eyes nearly popped out of his head.  His mouth dropped open in shock, and she gave him a playful push. She took the remote, gently, but forcefully, out of his hand.  

“Okay, so maybe I’m feeling things, I already told you I love you, so what’s the point to this and the job?”

“This job could jeopardize us if we have a future someday,” Chuck said, taking her hand.  “It leaves us too exposed, and frankly I don’t want us having to worry about someone targeting us or any possible family.”

“Ellie and Awesome,” Sarah said softly.  Chuck looked away for a second and then back at Sarah. She knew there was more, and raised an eyebrow, waiting.

“Total truth?” he asked.  She nodded.  “ANY possible family.”  She thought for a second, and straightened a little.

“Oh, kids,” she said, looking down.  Chuck sat there with the look only he could have.  

“Sarah, it may only be a 1% chance or less, but you would never forgive yourself if you threatened the safety of your kids because of something we did today.”

“Do you think we’ll have kids,” she asked softly, ashamed that she couldn’t look him in the eye.

“I have no idea,” he answered truthfully. She lifted her head and looked in his eye.

“Do you think we’ll figure us out?”  Chuck took a deep breath.

“You want the truth?”  She nodded, Chuck grinned.  

“It may not be what you want to hear,” he warned.

“I need to know.”  Chuck dropped his head and nodded, looking at the floor.  His face cracked into the biggest smile and he looked up, his eyes holding hers.

“I’ve fought for you for five years, and I’m going to fight for you for the rest of my life, so yes.  It may take us a very long time to get there, for you to remember, or understand, or whatever it is that you need to know that you can’t control what we feel for each other, but yes, we will be back together.”  Sarah smiled, reached up, and rubbed his face with her hand.  Tears were in her eyes.

“I don’t know if I can ever love you as much as you love me,” she began.  Chuck started to speak, but she laid a finger on his lips.  “I know I’ve done some stuff for us, and I’d move mountains for us, but you…you put your heart out there every day, knowing it will probably get rejected, watching out for the possibility of a future us, protecting kids you can’t even really believe will happen given where we are, and yet you keep being you.  No complaints, patient as can be, and never, ever, pressuring me to do one thing I’m not ready for.”  Chuck smiled behind her finger.  He gently moved it from his mouth.

“That’s just it, Baby.  You would, you have, and you did.  Someday you’ll remember, or learn again, or just go with it, and until that day, know, it’s all worth it.”  Sarah looked deep into his eyes, leaned forward, and gently kissed him.  When she pulled away, she ran her hand lightly through his hair.  

“So, no to the job,” she said.  Chuck nodded.  She stood, and looked down at Chuck.  “I need some time.”  Chuck nodded. She started to turn and go, but stopped and faced him.  “You know once we take the next step, I can’t go back, right?”  Chuck nodded.  “You know I can’t do that to you, right?  You know that’s why I’m being so cautious, not because I don’t love you, and don’t want you, it’s because I can’t hurt you anymore than I already have.”

“Baby, you’re here with me, and that’s all I care about.”  She smiled, turned, and headed to her room.  After the door closed, Chuck let out a breath.  “I need a shower…a cold one…possibly two.”  And, that’s what he went to do.  Leaving the shower, he realized he didn’t bring any clothes to change into.  He wrapped a towel around himself, and made his way down the hall, hoping he didn’t run into Sarah.  He didn’t think she’d be upset with him to see him that way, but he really wasn’t sure, and the last thing he needed was her thinking he pressured her.  He noticed light coming from his room.  He pushed the door opened slowly, and saw candles lit around the room.  He started to say something, when he noticed Sarah laying on the bed, dressed in the same purple negligee she had worn when she had been his pretend girlfriend a long time ago.  His mouth was dry. She smiled at him.  

“I lied,” she said softly, playing with a piece of the clothing.  “I wore this on purpose back then.  I don’t know why.  I mean, I really don’t remember why.  I remember thinking how much you’d like it, but I can’t remember, and that sucks.  I may never get my memories back, but I know I love you.  I know you love me.  I know I don’t want to go through life without you.”  Chuck stood there, speechless.  “Chuck?”

“This isn’t a dream, or the Intersect, or phase 3, or phase 4, or something that happens to me in these situations?” Sarah smiled coyly.

“Chuck, I do remember something.”  She stood up, walked over to him, and undid the towel. As it hit the floor, his mouth dropped. “Chuck, shut up and kiss me.”  And he did.

#fan fic #Chuck #Sarah #Charah #My Season 6 #I so need this more than you do #I KNOW ITS FLUFF #I don't even care a little #I need better hashtags

[cocoarosalia]

Rocking the Cradle Chapter 9: Dangers of Being Daddy

‘Ok Agreste, today is your big day’ He thought to himself when he woke up bright and early. Adrien rolled himself out of bed, tiptoed past his little sleeping angel and got himself ready for the fun day he had planned for himself and Elly.

And boy oh boy was he pumped. The playground, the park, the arcade, anything his little princess wanted today she would get two fold.

Turns out however...Eloise apparently just wanted sleep.

No matter how much he softly called out her name, nudged her, absolutely nothing worked in getting the sleeping beauty awake. His panic alarm started to go off a little in his head as he tried to understand and make sense as to why Elly just would not get up. Was she sick, was she just ignoring him *Gasp* did she no longer like him!?

He paced around his room panicked as to what to do

...There was no other choice

He didn’t want to do it but what this was an emergency

Adrien whipped out his phone and made a drastic call to the only one who knew what to do

*bzzt*

A very comfortable body groaned as she rolled over, trying desperately to ignore the constant vibrations of her phone.

*bzzt*

‘Lord, If you’re out there, please make the bad sound go away. For me? Please?’

The buzzing suddenly ceased

‘Well what do ya know? Guess I’m going to church today.’

*bzzt*

‘Or becoming Atheist. That also works.”

Marinette slapped around her bed for the offending object. Whoever was on the other line better be dead, dying, or offering her a spot on the next Maison Kitsuné line. She finally found her phone and shoved it under her head to lay her ear on it.

“Hello?” She muttered groggily to her perpetrator

What she was not anticipating, however, was a nervous, blonde, male voice on the other end.

“Hey Mari. Were you by any chance...sleeping?” Responded a very awkward Adrien knowing full well what the answer was.

“Well I’m not now as you can hear” She replied yawning and stretching out her limbs

“Sorry to wake you. Trust me, I know I promised that this would be your relaxation day and that I wouldn’t bother you but I have a slight dilemma over here with Eloise.”

This was high cause for alarm in Marinette’s mind

“What’s wrong with my baby?” She said a little more demandingly than she had meant to

“See that’s the thing!” He responded with just as much worry “I don’t know! No matter what I do she’s not moving”

“What do you mean not moving? Is she breathing?” Now she was out of bed and rushing to throw on any clothes she can find, just so that she can go save her daughter and get her to a hospital.

“Well of course she’s breathing”

...what?

“It’s just that no matter how gently I try to wake her up she just will not get up. She’s still just sleeping, the little lazy lima bean. I don’t know what to do”

Marinette dropped her first aid bag

‘If I was not in love with this man I’d punch him square in his beautiful jaw’ She collapsed back onto her bed and sighed deeply.

“Adrien...What is today?”

There was a pause of confusion “Uh saturday?”

“Yes, that is correct. That makes it the weekend and I can tell you with utmost certainty that no one in the Dupain-cheng household get’s up for ANYTHING before 10:30 at the earliest on the weekends. Now tell me, what time is it?”

Again more hesitation but this one was clearly out of shame “Uh 8:30?”

The drowsy 18 year old hummed in approval “Very good. So now that you know all that information I will leave you with this. Elly’s body is on a schedule, including on the weekends and while I appreciate your initiative that girl is not getting up until 10:30. When that time comes and you really want her to get up just bait her with a strawberry croissant and she’ll be up in a snap ok?”

Adrien gave a very meek ok and apology. She wished him a good day and hung up the phone.

Marinette got back in her pajamas and rolled back up into bed to drift back off to sleep for at least for the next 2 hours

But before slipping off into dreamland she giggled to herself

“He’ll make a great dad. Give his wife a heart attack, but be a great dad”

2 hours and a pastry later Elly was yawning lazily, munching on her croissant as her papa set out the outfit for today. After swallowing the last piece she hopped off her bed and meandered her way over to the proud father who had just laid out the last piece. With a pink extended short-sleeved shirt saying “Daddy’s spoiled princess” in gold glitter and floral leggings Adrien simply had to give himself a pat on the back. The sparkle flats that he included were an especially fine touch. He may be a model but he could put together an outfit if he needed to.

Feeling smug and confident in his abilities He lifted Eloise up under arm and paraded his way into his bathroom for her morning bath, a beaming smile plastered on his face.

That smile however, was gone the moment he realized something crucial.

His tub was massive even for him. Which means it’s the size of a mini swimming pool to her.

And Elly took very much delight in that fact.

Adrien struggled desperately to keep her still as she kept breaking out of his hold to go for a swim. Water splashed everywhere while he cleaned her body and massive mane of hair. By the time it was all said and done she was all clean while he was in massive need of a change in clothes

It was 11:30 by the time they were both fully dressed the model papa was starting to gain some pride back in his work. Eloise looked mighty precious as she twirled in her glittering shoes, admiring how they shimmered.

And while he didn’t want to be THAT dad…

He had to take a few selfies and send them to his partner.

*Over with our child-free Heroine*

Marinette was just finishing brushing her teeth when her phone went off, signaling a new message.

She gargled, spit out her mouthwash and opened the texts

And whoo boy was she so glad that she didn’t have anything in her mouth too cause these photos were spit-take inducing

Message after message Adrien sent her pictures of their little girl and him admiring her precious look. Elly posed this way and that, showing off every inch of her outfit while trying hard to imitate her cool daddy on the many billboards she’s seen.

He even sent selfies of the two of them trying to be (As he so gracefully texted) #SWAGTASTIC together

There was no other way she could phrase it

Her daughter and “husband” were utter dorks

Her dorks most definitely, but without a doubt dorks.

So she responded with a goofy selfie of her own using two tooth brushes like walrus tusks

Once Adrien and Elly ate breakfast and were prepared for their day out there was a knock on his bedroom door.

The big blonde got up from his seat on the couch to answer but Eloise jumped in front of his path

He looked at her with a confused expression and she explained that she wanted to get the door (you know like an adult)

It took everything in him not to laugh at her “Sunshine, don’t you think you’re a little too teeny for the door?”

She shook her head firmly and commanded that he watch her

She approached the door, ready to prove herself worthy of such a momentous task

She reached out her hand toward the knob

...and then reached a little further

…….Little more

Aaaaaaand nothing. The poor thing really was way too short to reach the handle.

‘She so fucking cute; I love her so fucking much’ Adrien wanted nothing more than to watch her tiny little frame struggle to reach with her dainty hands.

But he couldn’t enjoy it for too long as she came up to him with frustrated tears in her eyes.

He kneeled down to her level and stroked her long hair “What’s wrong my little sunbeam?”

She sniffed “I can’t do it”

‘Even her crying is cute I can’t take it’ He gave her a hug “It’s ok honey let’s open it together ok?”

She gave a light nod and with her gripping onto her papa’s shirt they opened up the door to a very cheerful but confused nino with a very flustered Sammy in tow.

“Christ man what took so long?” Nino question

“Elly had a slight issue with the door” Adrien explained letting them pass through into his massive space

Nino ruffled the green eyed girls hair “Aww don’t worry ya little trouble-maker, you’ll get there eventually”

Adrien peered down at Sammy looking quite frustrated but with a light pink tint on cheeks “What’s up with him?” He questioned

“Oh I have no idea. I told him that we were hanging out today and he was all for it but when I told him that it was with you and Elly on the way over he INSISTED that he wanted to go back home. Honestly, your guess is as good as mine.”

Eloise was very concerned hearing this. Why on earth would Sammy not wanna play with her? Was he mad with her? Did she not share her toys with him? What could it possibly be?

There was a tug on her papa’s sleeve as Elly requested to be let on to the floor. As soon as she was she got in close to Sammy. His copper skin flared red as he could feel her nose touch his.

“W-what do you want L-lemonhead?” He nervously demanded. Jade eyes studied his featured closely and he was getting twitchier by the second. The silence stretched for what felt like forever as neither said a single word.

“Sammy” She announced. The boy flinched to attention “Yeah?”. She took a pause “Why don’t you want to play with me? I thought we had always been friends?”

Sammy had to take a moment to process the randomness of the question. When he realized finally what she asked his chest puffed up in fake bravado “Isn’t it obvious? Men don’t play with little girls we play with other men. It’s just not natural.”

“Well that’s stupid”

That puffed up chest instantly deflated

“No it’s not!” He argued “It makes perfect sense. I’m supposed to play with men, not girls”

“But you play with Sophie”

“Well she’s my sister I have no choice”

“You play with the teacher”

“That’s cause she’s a lady, not a girl”

“Isn’t that the same thing?”

“Uh, no. There’s a huge difference.”

“And that is?”

“Unlike you she doesn’t kick around soccer balls and stomp in dirt.”

“But boys do”

“...yea”

“So I’m like a boy?”

“N-no! You’re a girl and I won’t play with you!”

This conversation had gone on long enough for Elly’s liking so she just grabbed Sammy’s hand. For the umpteeth time his cheeks grew red as she dragged him over by the window so that they could do what they always do, play with their toys while he complains about everything. Eloise didn’t mind though; Sammy just had a funny way of showing how much he really likes to play with her. So for now, this was fine.

Adrien however, was not at all pleased by the development. As he and Nino sat on the couch it was clear that he was silently fuming.

“Soooo” Nino prodded suggestively “It’s clear that my sammy might have a thing for your Elly….What is the possibility for a potential merger? You know the Agrestes and Lahiffe’s?”

Adrien turned to him with a bright (but obviously fake smile) “I’m fine with whoever Elly finds love in”

Nino was cautious but ultimately convinced that his son might have gotten them rich!

“Provided he can survive 5 consecutive photoshoot without a single pose needing to be redone, Withstand 2 hours of fangirling meet and greets and display to me the head of a bear that he slayed with a toothpick and his wits”

Ok maybe not so rich

The enraged father simply had to show his “Wife” this nonsense. No little girl of theirs would ever fall in love so quickly. It’s unheard of!

If Marinette knew how relaxing it would be to have a child-free weekend, she would’ve had Adrien take Elly every other weekend.

Of course she loved her little angel but Mama likes not watching sailor moon every once in awhile.

She was currently with Alya and Sophie, sipping on a Latte and eating a danish when her phone buzzed with the latest update from her partner.

“Text from the Hubby?” Alya questioned while Sophie doodled in a coloring book.

“Yup and he’s not too pleased it seems”

Mari handed her best friend the phone so that she could see for herself and Adrien did not disappoint.

The picture was of Sammy and Elly playing 3DS together by the window, propped up side by side while looking deep in concentration.

What followed was nothing short of magical

A page long RANT detailing just how much he would not stand for ‘this two-bit punk taking away his precious ray of sunshiny sweetness for his selfish boy needs’

“Soooo...Adrien seems a tad overprotective of my summer child”

The bluenette slipped out a small snort of laughter as she took her phone back “A little is putting it in kind words I’d say”

“Well I’m glad you’re not like that, god forbid you ever decide to have a son.”

“Oh I’d never be that bad. All that stuff is so excessive”

There was an airy laugh that filled the space between them. It was sunny and quite nice

“I mean all I’d ask is that he make an 8 tier raspberry filling wedding style cake with orchid sugar flowers, real flowers as the topper and a water brush design outlining his undying vows to my daughter.”

...Until it wasn’t

She sipped casually on her drink while flipping through her phone. Sophie and Alya could do nothing more than watch in abject horror.

‘With parents like these I hope Elly never gets married!’ They thought

Truly Eloise had a lot of trials ahead of her

Despite his distaste for the idea of his little sunshine hanging out with what could turn out to be a potential suitor Adrien was still proper father and good friend as the 4 of them chose to go out to the park instead of spend all their time indoors and miss out on the warm weather.

When they got to the park it was obvious that spring was in full affect. Flowers were blooming all over the place and it felt like every kid in the city was out and about. At first Adrien was worried about how Elly would feel about seeing that many kids around but instead she couldn’t wait to play with so many new friends.

Once both Papa’s let their little ones go they were left in the dust, alone with each other and their thoughts.

They found a nearby bench and just decided to shoot the breeze.

“So how’s the whole parenting thing going for you” Nino asked handing his friend a bottle of juice

“Not bad I’d say. Elly met my dad yesterday”

Nino winced “ooooo that must not have gone well. The little fireball must’ve been terrified”

“That’s the crazy thing. She was at first but honestly I was more upset than she was”

“Duh, the old crypt keeper meeting a child of yours that he himself ‘did not authorize’? That’s pretty rough man”

“Yea but somehow she totally turned him around. Now he’s just as smitten with her as I am.” He took a long chug of his juice “I just hope she’ll one day find a family that’ll care for her the way Mari and I do.”

Suddenly a swift but well meaning slap came to the back of his head

“What the hell man!” He exclaimed

“Sorry dude, I just figured I needed to jog some of that stupid out of you.”

Adrien rubbed the back of his head gingerly (I mean it did hurt like fuck) but relaxed nonetheless

“Why are you talking about stupid stuff like another family looking after her? The program’s not even half over and you’re already thinking about how you’re gonna give her away? Talk about looking a gift horse in the mouth.”

True, they were only in week four of the program but Adrien couldn’t afford to invest his heart too heavily into Elly. It would only tear up his heart worse than him losing his mom.

“Look, I’m not saying it won’t happen. I’d never lie to you like that. But what I am saying is enjoy her while you have her there otherwise there was no point in doing the program in the first place.”

He looked at Nino in surprise admiration, who knew the goof could be so deep.

“Plus, if you’re not careful some boy like those over there will whisk her away before you even know it.”

He turned his head to witness a true nightmare. At least 4-5 boys had gathered around his little girl, all requesting that she play with them. And where was her supposed “Potential suitor”? Just standing on the side gawking, without the slightest clue what to do.

He wasted no time in marching over, collecting her up into his arms (to her surprise, yet still delight because yay daddy), and spending the rest of their time at the park playing exclusively together while he maliciously glared daggers at any boy that dared attempt to approach her (especially Sammy).

“Yup, enjoy her while you can buddy” Nino said to himself as he comforted a dejected Sammy over on the bench “Cause you won’t have her long”

And that’s how the rest of their outing adventure went. Adrien had renewed vigor to enjoy his little girl no matter what the future called for. They went down to the river seine, got ice cream and even played pranks on gabriel (wasn’t the best plan but boy was it fun) all the while sending Marinette picture after picture showing off their fun.

And she had to admit, It was a blast seeing them. She was glad that he was managing to even keep up with their little ball of energy. However, she did have to admit to her own mild jealousy over their fun too. Mari so wanted to just run out and join in on all the antics but she knew it was best to let her “husband” have as much time with Elly as he wanted; it was only fair.

And so she went on ahead with her own fun by sending selfies of her out jogging, baking with her own mama and papa, and enjoying a luxurious bath before bed (Adrien couldn’t bring himself to show Elly that pic. It wasn’t bad in the least but of course he had his ‘wife’s’ modesty to protect). Overall both parents agreed that this would not be even close to the last time they switched on duties.

The last pic sent that day was of Adrien and Eloise sharing the same bed for no other reason than she refused to sleep alone. Elly was curled up beside him, her head nestled on his chest.

The caption read “I hope she stays this cute forever”

*Technical end of chapter but do keep reading*

Marinette responded with a selfie of her curled up in her bed, a button up PJ set draped over her petite figure.

Except she may have forgotten to fasten a few buttons out of laziness.

Adrien’s face flushed bright red as he quickly checked to make sure Eloise was fast asleep. He then silently slipped out of bed and up the staircase so that she couldn’t see.

*From Adreamy* ‘um, was the buttons thing on purpose? N-not trying to start anything just wondering’

Now, If she was in her right mind she’d apologize profusely and die of shame and embarrassment.

...good thing she wasn’t though

*From Mama Mari* Idk yet. I’ll let you know if I get a selfie of your reaction

Adrien.exe was having a real hard time responded

‘Do I respond? Do I leave it alone? Do I just tell her good night?...DO I RESPOND!?’

He decided to respond

Marinette was quite pleased by the selfie she received of Adrien’s adorably blushed face. He was even looking away How cute

*From Adreamy* There. Satisfied

She scoffed

*From Mama Mari* For now. Though i’d be much more satisfied if you were with me

Adrien’s mouth was growing just a tad dry from that text ‘Alright so now she’s toying with me. Well I’m not Chat Noir for nothing, two can play at this game’

*From Adreamy* I can’t imagine what we’d do together. We would have a little green eye’d warden with us.

*From Mama Mari* That’s the beautiful thing about grandparents. We could have aaaalll the time in the world, and in some cases...a whole house to ourselves too.

Alright, he may be chat noir but not even if he donned the suit himself could he beat that. The air in the room suddenly felt quite stuffy.

The final text of the night then came through

*From Mama Mari* Goodnight Daddy. Have fun dreaming of those possibilities

Fuck now he needed a cold shower...and a long walk

and she never answered his question either

Marinette switched off her bedside lamp and rolled over. She would later drown in the embarrassment the next morning. But for now, she was feeling on top of the world

“He’ll be a great dad” She whispered to herself drifting off to sleep “A cuter husband too”

#miraculous ladybug #mlfamily #ml fanfic #ml fandom #mlfanfic #chapter 9 #new chapter #Rocking the cradle #Eloise agreste #Marinette #marinette cheng #adrienette #adrien agreste #nino lahiffe #sammy #adoptionau #tattoo #orphan #long post #flirt