#But some days I AM SO JEALOUS because just LOOK at all this institutional bullshit | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

sukirichi · 3 years

Note

Hello! Can you write one about Nanami where the reader is oblivious and they're really close to Gojo so he gets jealous often. Sometimes Gojo does things purposely to annoy him and one day he just lost his composure and accidentally admitted his feelings for you.

I hope u accept if you're not too busy. Thank you!!!

— a little push

— sometimes all nanami needs is a little push.

nanami kento x fem! reader

thank you for the request anon! i’m not sure if reader is oblivious enough but i hope you like it! there’s some thick pining here hur hur, i hope you like it! i never knew i needed an easily flustered and awkward nanami in my life also this is unedited as usual

check my bio for masterlist and my milestone event! (◕ᴗ◕✿)

“Do you mind?”

Nanami sighs, silently praying to the heavens you wouldn’t hear the way his heart is absolutely panicking and beating wildly right now. You’d randomly pushed him inside the teachers’ office the moment he got back to the institute at work, and now he’s doomed to hide his feelings while you look up at him with wide, innocent eyes, a shaky yet excited grin painted on your face.

“Sorry, sorry,” you wave your hands in front of you, although he can tell you’re not apologetic at all. Nanami clears his throat when you step backwards to give him space, unsure if he’s happy or sad about the distance. “I was just really excited to see you back.”

Your carefree, lighthearted voice, along with that little jump in your toes combined with your statement – you’re basically asking Nanami to shrivel up already.

The stoic man remains composed, though, only shifting to adjust his tie while he stares down at you. You’re still somewhat bouncing on your feet, teeth biting your lip – a habit you had when you want to say something but contemplating whether you should. Tilting away to hide the slight flush in his cheeks, Nanami sighs again, pretending to be tired.

The last thing he wants to admit that even though he is exhausted from work, is that you’d never bother him. In fact, having you bombard him like this makes him feel like he didn’t deal with special grade curse by himself all alone just an hour ago.

“If there’s something you want to say, I suggest you get it over with. I don’t want to stay overtime and wait until the blindfolded creep comes around.”

You giggle at his insult, hiding behind your cupped palms. Crap, Nanami looks away and focuses on the birds outside instead, suddenly finding them so interesting despite never paying attention to them before. Maybe that was the curse of crushes – it had people acting differently and in complete contrast with their behavior.

“About that,” you begin almost shyly now, and Nanami practically bursts when he sees you tapping both of your pointer fingers together, gaze tilted away from him.

It makes him wonder you’re nearly on the same skill to Gojo, yet still somehow look like a small, innocent being that makes him want to protect you from everything – even if you were more than capable of handling things yourself. Well, Nanami concludes to himself, maybe you’re really just that paradoxical that it makes sense why he can never think straight around you. Maybe he’s really not supposed to understand the complexity of his feelings when you were a phenomena to begin with already.

“You see…Satoru asked me out.”

Nanami stiffens at your statement for a split second before his head whips to you so fast. You’re observant – of course you are, you’re a jujutsu sorcerer – and you easily pick up in his sudden change of demeanor. Your brow raises at his abrupt reaction, to which Nanami conceals by flexing his neck and rolling his shoulders back.

“I am simply tired from work,” he haf-lies, “So, Satoru asked you out? Will you say yes?”

His words and tone are monotonous, almost bored even, but deep inside he’s so close to beating the crap out of his co-worker. Well, not really, Nanami isn’t a man of violence, but he’s jealous. Of course he is – he’s liked you ever since Principal Yaga hired you.

He’s never told Satoru about his little crush on you. He would be stupid to do such; Satoru would tease him to no end and maybe even be as childish to go as far as pushing him to you. Typical elementary shit, Nanami cringes to himself, watching as you look down at your feet with a pout. Now that confused him. He isn’t sure what your body language means at all, but patient as ever, Nanami only waits.

“Well,” you scratch your forehead, “I’m really flattered. I want to say yes because Satoru is a nice guy—”

“He is not. I do not respect him.”

You roll your eyes at the way his eyes darkens, “—but also I’m not sure if I should. I mean, Satoru doesn’t really date, you know? He’ll be with like one girl and be with another the next week. I just don’t want to…like, fall for that, I guess. Not that I won’t, because he’s totally not my type—”

“It’s just a yes or no,” Nanami cuts you off, his words coming out a lot harsher than he intends it to be. It’s not that he’s annoyed at your rambling, he actually finds it so adorable when you get so lost in your train of thoughts that your mind just travels from one place to another, and seeing how your eyes just leave farther from reality is something he’s always find such an attractive quirk, but not now – not when his infuriating co-worker is intending to mess with your feelings. “Do you want to go or not? Yes or no? It’s as simple as that.”

You blink back at him in surprise, mouth opening and closing like a fish. Sometimes it’s hard to remember that Nanami was a no-bullshit man who hit things right on the head, a huge contrast to your happy-go-lucky self, but he’s right.

It is that simple – and you’re complicating things all over again.

When you give him an answer, Nanami has to muster all his energy to not deflate. He’s tired – but now his exhaustion and even the heartbreak comes crashing down all over him that he’s immediately weighed down and overwhelmed – so much so that all he wants is to go home.

“Yes, I want to go.”

It’s his day off.

Like everything else in his life, Nanami plans everything down to the last minute of his day. His day off consisted of him having the privilege to sleep in until 8am, then breakfast with coffee from that great café a five minute walk away from his apartment, then he’ll be reading books in his study for two hours. Comes after that is lunch, and he’ll brows through some TV shows, pick up his clothes from the dry cleaning, get that special limited edition dinner of his favorite sushi, read books again and call it a day.

Simple, peaceful, no hassle – it’s the perfect day to relax.

Except it isn’t.

Because it’s your day off too, and you’re out on a date with Satoru. He still remembers how happy you looked then upon accepting the white haired man’s invitation, your nimble fingers wrapped around his sleeve as you shyly asked him to come with you.

He doesn’t know why you had to bring him, but he doesn’t question it, nonetheless. Nanami wants to see how Satoru would react, if there could be any indication from the man behind his blindfold that he had ill intentions. Oddly enough, there didn’t seem to be any. Satoru only beamed and deflated into a chibi, enthusiastically nodding along with you while you planned your date together.

Nanami took it upon himself to leave.

With a silent scoff, Nanami placed his dinner down on the counter. Because it’s his day off – and mostly because he doesn’t feel like himself – Nanami went out to buy the limited edition sushi wearing a white shirt and some gray sweatpants, too forlorn and a little jealous to even bother dressing up.

It’s stupid, really. He’s been looking forward for this sushi for a long, long time, but now that he’s had it, he can’t even enjoy the taste. His mind keeps going back to you.

Were you having fun with Satoru? Were you enjoying your time? Was Satoru treating you well? What was Satoru’s intentions when it came with you? The last time Nanami checked, you and him got along really well and you’re mostly the one who whacks the taller man in the head upside down when he’s being stupid, almost like two peas in a pod, except you were the smarter one. He’d been so sure you’re nothing but friends and yet…it all lead to this.

Nanami pushes his sushi away. They no longer taste like anything, the texture like dried paper on his mouth. He wipes his lips with a napkin, staring longingly at well…nothing. His walls were plain and empty, and suddenly, Nanami can’t help but compare himself to Gojo.

You both planned to go to the local carnival. There’d be lots of foods and even parlor shops, ferris wheel rides and photo booths to create memories. Of course you and Satoru would go there; both of you enjoyed loud, bustling crowds, claiming there was something amazing about basking in the “lives of humans when ignorant of curses” while Nanami prefers his peace and silence.

Had you gone out on a date with him instead, Nanami can’t guarantee he’ll be any fun. He most definitely wouldn’t ask you to go to a carnival with him either. It was loud, cramped, crowded, and it’s too chaotic for him to ever enjoy your presence and enjoy it alone.

Nanami closes the sushi box, turns on the TV and lets is play on the background, a wet towel above his eyes to relax his tired eyes.

He hopes you’re having fun. He hopes Satoru is treating you well. Nanami just ignores the slight pain in his chest when he thinks of you, laughing and touching anyone but him, and he could picture it already. You’ve always been so open and welcoming to everyone, he knows you’ll have fun today, too.

That’s one of the things he finds most endearing about you – that your smile never fades and you never forget about the simple, little things in life to focus on to keep your sanity after facing curse after curse.

He’s fine, he tells himself. Satoru may be annoying, but he knows you could have fun with him, and you deserved to be happy more than anyone else.

Nanami is about to fall asleep on his couch when his phone vibrates on the coffee tables. Groaning, he flicks off the towel to his shoulders, grumbling about how Principal Yaga better be respecting his day off, but the last thing he expects to see is your contact name flashing on the screen. In the contact photo, you’re winking with a peace sign held above your head.

You look so utterly adorable Nanami just wants to kiss you. He remembers this photo was taken when Yuuji got bored and asked to play games on his phone. Upon finding that there was none – of course there was none – the strawberry-haired student opted for taking pictures of everyone instead. There’s one with Nobara growling, Megumi sipping his boba-tea with dead eyes as if he’s so done with the world, more than twenty pictures of Satoru flexing his muscles and posing like an idiot, and then there’s yours.

Nanami remembers staring at his phone for a solid minute, his gallery actually blessed with your face in it. The sun shines behind you on that photo and you’re absolutely shining. He thinks that’s when he truly fell in love.

And it just so happened the love of his life is calling, making his heart skip a beat because shouldn’t you be with Gojo? Why were you calling him? Did something wrong happen?

Nanami doesn’t waste another second before swiping the green icon, already standing up from the couch as he grabs his jacket. He had this weird inkling something is wrong, why else would you call him?

His theories are proven true when your voice comes out shaky. “H-hello?”

“Good evening,” he greets stiffly, brows furrowed as he listens in on the way you seem to be shuffling around. “Is there something wrong?”

“I, uhm,” he hears you sniffle through the other line, “Yeah, I guess there is…Satoru just texted he can’t come because Principal Yaga suddenly sent him to a mission overseas…and then I just realized that Satoru’s been summoned by the elders and he’s just refusing to show up, so now they cornered him, I guess… anyways, I’m talking too much and I don’t want to be a bother, but would you maybe…like to hang out with me?”

Nanami’s hand freezes on the doorknob. “Hang out…professionally?”

He immediately wants to smack himself in the forehead for that. Out of all things he could’ve said, he just had to utter something unintelligent. He hears you snicker in the background and Nanami’s ears redden.

He quickly regains his composure with a clear of his throat, suddenly remembering that Satoru’s ditched you, so now you’re asking him instead. It kind of feels like he’s just a replacement, but Nanami buries this feeling down before it consumes him, wondering if he’s already regretting changing into better clothes because he actually agreed to go to a carnival with you.

Upon hearing your happy, “Okay! I’ll wait for you then!”, Nanami realizes that he doesn’t actually mind. Especially not with you.

The carnival is loud.

Nanami dreads the moment he steps out of his car, his body swallowed by the bustling crowd and defeaning music of banging drums and clashing instruments. There’s a hundred scents everywhere – smoke, fish, glazed apples – he doesn’t know where to begin or how to focus.

He nearly turns back to his hair, about to shoot you a text that maybe this is beyond him after all. His head begins to spin when he’s only pushed deeper into the crowd, people bumping into him with every single second and it’s so suffocating. It doesn’t make sense to him how anyone could possibly go on a date like this and enjoy it. He knows for sure this chaos won’t let him enjoy his date’s presence because he’s too busy trying to get away from it all.

Nanami staggers for a bit when a strong hand tugs him to the side. Soon, he finds himself pressed flush against you in a tight corner, your hips warm on his. “Hi,” you breathe out airily, lashes fanning and fluttering in that same manner that always made his heart do complete flips.

“Hello,” he greets back with a small bow out of faux respect, but really, he’s just keeping his head down because you look so beautiful in that moment he doesn’t even know where to look. You’re warm and soft next to his hard and stiff muscles, the scent of roses and vanilla mixing in with the street smoke and Nanami’s head grows dizzy, his hand around yours tightening for comfort. “Y/N…I do not prefer this crowd. Can I take you back home instead? You must be tired – I’ll prepare dinner for you.”

Nanami blinks back in surprise when he sees you nod, a slight grimace on your face, and you practically bury your face in his bicep as you groan, “It’s too noisy for me too. Let’s just hang out at your place.”

So you end up in his immaculately clean apartment, admiring and staring at the boring furniture. Nanami changes into more comfortable clothes and whips out something to cook, not wanting to feed you measly take out when you’re probably famished. He watches with side glances as you pick up a photo of him with his parents when he was younger, cooing and giggling at the baby version of him.

“Nanamin, you’re so cute!”

Nanami scoffs and turns back to the heated water in the bowl, arms hard as they cross against his chest covered with an apron. “Please do not call me cute. I am anything but.”

“No, you’re really cute,” you insist, but after seeing Nanami’s flustered frown, you eventually give up and give the poor man a break. Later, you wobble next to him, watching with curious eyes and a small smile as he adds the vegetables into the soup, moving expertly as he diced up the onions to the side. The sheer focus and attention on his daily tasks makes him falter, and he suddenly finds it so hard to function now.

“Why are you staring at me? Is there something so interesting about slicing up onions?”

“No, not really,” you say absentmindedly, the slight plop of the ingredients echoing. “It’s just – I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this way. Domestic, I mean, but it looks good on you,” you nod to yourself, and Nanami finds himself struggling to act as if your presence wasn’t making him go crazy while he proceeds to cook. “In fact, everything looks good on you, and I find you really interesting!”

“Y-you do?”

“Yes, of course!”

“Why?”

“I don’t know,” you shrug, assisting him silently with mixing the bowl even when he didn’t ask you to. Unaware that he’s now focused on you, watching you cook with him with you pressed up against his side, almost as if it’s right where you belong, Nanami feels the same with you. You also look good being this domestic with him, and he suddenly blurts out, “Would you like to stay with me? Like this?”

Your eyes slide over his in a slow fashion, slow enough that his brain hotwires at the fear maybe he’s said something wrong. But Nanami immediately swallows it down, huffing and turning away from you with that stoic expression again. “Forgive me. That was weird—”

“Why would it be weird?” you laughed to yourself before bumping your hips with his, “You’re the one who invited me here. Of course I want to stay.”

That’s…that’s not what he means.

Nanami is left staring openly at you while you help him set the table and you proceed to talk about how you didn’t really want to go to the carnival but Satoru insisted you’d have fun, so you went anyway even if you’d much prefer to be somewhere else. He’s barely listening, too distracted by the way your lips move and how you swing the house slippers on your big toe, your legs crossed on top of another and your figure slightly hunched across from him.

You look so comfortable and welcomed in his home that it puts him at ease too, not worried that he has to impress you anything because it’s you, and Nanami could actually be vulnerable enough to laugh with you over a bowl of vegetable soup.

It’s fine, he lies to himself again, it’s fine that you don’t know he likes you even if he tends to slip and be obvious sometimes. Because at least you’re with him in that moment, and he lies to himself again that it’s fine, that maybe next time he’ll tell you, but he doesn’t worry about. How could he worry about it when you’re snorting so loud over a lame joke he said that rice nearly came out your nose, and he’s so drunk over the sound of your bubbly laughter that something flutters deep within his belly?

When you help him wash the dishes and bask in the silence instead, comfortable over the lack of words and nothing but the sound of his faucet running and the slight rubbing of towels against dishes heard in the background, Nanami is unsure whether he’s glad that Satoru ditched you on your first date.

It doesn’t stop there.

Nanami only keeps falling in love with you more. He’s been doing a good job of keeping his feelings to himself because the last thing he wants is to have you stay away from him, but Satoru was really getting on his nerves.

He’s just come back from exorcising a curse when he sees you and Satoru play-wrestling in the field with the other students. Megumi is grumbling to himself in the corner, Yuuji is laughing and cheering on you to tackle down his sensei who’s currently going down in high-pitched laughter, Toge pumping his fists and screaming, “Salmon, salmon!”

It’s a chaotic sight – one that he usually doesn’t mind – until you finally pin Satoru down on the ground, your ass above his crotch. Satoru’s hands then come up to squeeze your ass and hips under the false pretense he’s struggling to push you off him, but Nanami knows better.

“Give up already!” you tease the other sorcerer who’s still wriggling underneath you, and Nanami sees it before it happens.

Satoru’s legs bend beneath you and he tries to pin you under him in quick movements, but Nanami is faster, his reflexes taking over. Before he realizes what he’s doing, Nanami tugs you and pulls you forward until you collide on his chest. He’s breathing hard, eyes narrowed at the arrogant smirk painted on Satoru’s features. Meanwhile, you’ve softened in Nanami’s grip, hands fisting his shirt that has him hardening up out of sheer protectiveness.

“Oh, Nanamin!” Satoru beams while wiping the dirt on his hands across his uniform, “Glad to see you here. You wanna join training too?”

“This is hardly training,” he retorts with a clenched jaw, “You’re harassing and disrespecting your fellow sorcerer because you can never keep your dirty hands to yourself,” before Satoru could defend himself, he’s already all over you, his hand tilting your chin side to side to check for any injuries. “Are you hurt anywhere? Did this bastard do anything else?”

“No, not really—”

“Why do you care so much, Nanamin?” Satoru teases, and the students all huddle to watch the commotion. Everyone can feel the tension rising, and Nanami only stiffens up further when he feels you lean closer to his warmth almost absentmindedly. “She and I were just playing around, no hard feelings, no foul play. We’re just having fun, right, Y/N?”

“She is not someone you can just have fun with, Satoru. You’ve already crossed the line when you ditched her on your first date, and you didn’t even bother texting or calling back when I drove her home. It’s disrespectful, and she deserves better than that.”

“Nanami—”

“I was busy,” Satoru sighs dramatically, “And if she deserves better than me, then who would it be? I can take care her of her, you know, she and I have been besties for like what, a year now? I’ll be good to her,” he smirks, and Nanami wants nothing more than to punch him square in the jaw. “Besides, it’s not like she’s dating anyone else. She’s single and ready to mingle—”

“Maybe she is, but I’m not,” Nanami deadpans, his harsh tone shocking everyone.

“Wh-what do you mean?” you squeak under him, and Nanami falls silent. He’s never thought of confessing to you, especially not this way, and Nobara is biting Yuuji’s jacket behind them to muffle her squeals. Panda is clapping his hands and whispers oh, here we go, followed by Toge’s salmon salmon.

It dawns on him now that everyone knows he likes you after all, and now that he’s confronted with the situation, he can’t run away from it. Not that Nanami plans on running away, for he is a man and his pride doesn’t allow him to evade situations like this.

He just wishes it could’ve gone out better.

“Forgive me if this makes you uncomfortable,” Nanami releases his grip on you, loosening his tie that makes him feel like he’s choking both on air and his words. Through his cool stature, he’s actually sweating inside his clothes, and it doesn’t help you’re patient with him too, head tilted to the side curiously and so horribly cutely he might combust. “But I have always been, and I still am, utterly in love with you.”

Nobara and Yuuji no longer hold back as they scream to themselves, the former slapping the latter in his back while Megumi only shakes his head, muttering “about time,” under his breath. Maki snickers to herself and Satoru is stunned, but it’s nothing compared to the way you shrink under his gaze for a moment.

He believes you’re going to run away from him because of his blatant confession; it wasn’t romantic at all, and the kids are still screaming too loudly for him to form coherent thoughts.

Nanami begins to form a deep bow, ready to apologize wholeheartedly and to politely ask you to forget this if you wish – he would respect your decision. But just as his gaze met the ground, he’s thrown off balance as you jump on him, soft glossy lips crashing into his.

The screams and cheers of everyone are suddenly drowned out when he feels your lips molding onto his, and he can feel you smiling happily, giggling while his hands tentatively run down your hips to hold you close. It’s unprofessional, displeasing, and downright horrendous to be kissing someone during work hours while the students are watching, especially because his clothes are crumpled from your eager touch and you’re on top of his chest, but Nanami absolutely doesn’t give a single fuck because he’s kissing you back fervently.

It’s what he’s always wanted – you’re the one he’s always wanted, and now that he has you in his hold, he’s not easily letting you go.

“See? I told you guys,” Satoru proudly puffs his chest up in the background, “All Nanamin needs is a little push.”

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clairecrive · 3 years

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Billy idea that I have no time to write myself loool: reader and Billy are friends with benefits. Reader is happy with the arrangement and knows Billy is sleeping with other women but she doesn't care. It's not serious with them. Billy however hadn't really thought about Reader sleeping with other people and he finds out. Maybe from friends (Frank, Curtis and Karen because hello AU) or maybe all of them are out at a bar and he sees her go home with someone else? But he gets suuuuper jealous about it and realises he wants more. I'll leave it up to you if Reader wants more too. Angsty jealous Billy though, am I right? Lmaooo (this is faulty-coding btw, hello 🖤)

"Commitment"

A/N: omg hi! I love your work so much I feel incredibly honoured that you chose me for this request! I hope you like it x This is also for this anon, I've combined the two requests since they were similar.

Warnings: angst, jealousy, slut-shaming, hurt-comfort, smut at the end

Word count: 3K +

Tags:@blackst0nes7077, @thefictionalgemini, @tarkanelima-blog

@pansysgirlfriend, @acciorudolphx @supernaturalcat7, @crazyclownchick (I don't know why it won't let me tag you)

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NAVIGATION PAGE

"Hey, stranger." A familiar voice and then his familiar touch on your back before he sat in front of you.

"Hi, Billy."

"it's been a while," he mentioned casually while his eyes took you in.

It had been more than a while, actually. Last time you saw Billy had been over a week ago. Well, you hadn't really seen him, that was the problem.

Ever since you had started your "agreement" you'd drop by his office from time to time to surprise him. He had told you that he deeply enjoyed office sex while you had never had it. Needless to say, it soon became one of your favourite things.

And that was why that day, you were at Anvil. You hadn't told Billy that you were coming. It wouldn't have been a surprise then, would it? However, when you stepped in front of his door, just one touch away from opening it, you heard it.

Well, heard her actually.

It was Billy that ended up surprising you that day. You usually loved surprises but that one you would have gladly skipped.

Although it had taken you most of a week to come to this realisation, you realized that it was actually a good thing to happen. The thing you had with Billy wasn't labelled. It was fun but it wasn't serious. Despite the fact that you were friends and hang out with the same group, you had never committed to each other.

And you were honestly fine with it. You enjoyed your time with Billy, outside and under the sheets.

It had been months though and you hadn't wanted to acknowledge it but it wasn't enough anymore. Billy's role in your life was ambiguous. He was your friend sure, but one you'd have sex with. He wasn't your boyfriend but he was the one you'd spend the most of your time with, the one with whom you were intimate.

You wanted more, you realized. Enough with these half measures.

Billy will understand, you told yourself. He inwardly made it clear where he stands. Time to broaden your horizons.

And, as matter of fact, you had. It was true that the ocean is full of fish but you hadn't had a lot of luck with them before. Sure, Jake was nice. He was polite and nice. An overall good guy.

He was just lacking a... je ne sais quoi that made you unsure about it. But you were willing to give him a chance and so you kept going on dates with him.

Needless to say, you hadn't spoken to Billy since that impromptu visit to his office.

"Been busy," you offered him taking a sip of your beer. It was a lame excuse but you couldn't care less. Karen offered you some appetizers. You stared at them for a bit before shaking your head refusing them. Ignoring Karen's questioning look, you took another sip.

"Yeah, she's been busy alright." Frank's low chuckle came from the other end of the table.

"Meaning?" Billy asked, now curious about the implication seeing how your cheeks had suddenly turned red.

"She met someone," Karen chirped in, winking in your direction.

Mentally facepalming you, you swore them off. It wasn't the way you wanted Billy to find out. Not that you cared what he thought since he couldn't be bothered to be as transparent with you, but still. You hated being put on the spot.

"Has she now?" Billy's eyebrow arched and he gave you an amused look. But his jaw clenched and that gave him away.

"Not that it's any of your business. But yes, I have. His name's Jake, he's a nice guy." You explained briefly, ignoring the intensity of his stare.

"So you're that kind of person then." Leaning over the table, his voice took an edge he had never directed at you. "Ditching her friends as soon as she meets a guy?"

"You know that's not true." Narrowing your eyes at him you were almost offended by his institution if it wasn't for the fact that you knew that it was his bruised ego speaking.

"Tell that to my many unanswered calls on your phone."

"That's not on Jake," you scoffed taking a sip. His eyebrow arched while his hands gestured to you as if to say "do tell".

"Let's just say that I saw firsthand just how busy you keep yourself when I'm not around." You tried to keep the bitterness out of your voice, you really did. But without success.

Billy's lips pursed in thought. You had no doubt that he had an inkling about what you meant but he couldn't figure out to what exactly you were referring to.

"So is this what it is? You being petty because I've been with someone else?"

"That's me wanting more for myself and taking it."

"If you were that insatiable, y/n, you should have just told me."

"Stop making me sound like a slut, Billy. That is not what this is about."

"Isn't it? Because that's exactly what this looks like to me."

Pursing your lips, you refused to show him just how much he had hurt you. Nodding your head you decided that you'd had enough. You did not have to sit here and take his bullshit.

"You know, Billy. Slut-shaming isn't a good look on you." Waving to your friends, you quickly told them that you had to go. An emergency you said. But they knew better, their eyes fixed on Billy as he watched you walk out of the bar. Hands tightening around the bottle of beer he had ordered, he stood up once you disappeared amongst the crowd.

Without bothering to explain himself to the group, he simply followed you outside.

"Y/n." He called your name once he saw that you were already a bit far from the bar. In a couple of quick strides, Billy had gotten to you since you had slowed down.

"Go away, Billy." you didn't bother to look at him.

"Wait, wait," he said gently taking hold of your arm to get you to stop. And you did but stared at his hand on you until he dropped it and took a step back. "Look I'm sorry, I was an asshole." he apologised.

You only nodded to show him that you understood him but didn't offer any words to assure him that you forgave him.

"And I'm sorry you had to find out about Madani that way." He added hoping to make things right between you.

"Don't worry, it was actually an awakening for me." You added briefly looking at him. Tone harsh and unapologetic. You were still too mad at him to care about being considerate of your voice.

"Really?"

"Yeah, it made me realize that this," you gestured between the two of you, "was not working out for me."

"Oh really?" now the word had lost every tint of disbelief it had before. It was more like he was challenging you. Like he didn't quite believe you.

"Yes." you stood your ground pushing your shoulders back, "I figured out that I want more. And I know that I'm not going to get that from you."

"It was good while it lasted though," you called over your shoulders as you turned, ready to get the hell away from him. But the words he said though, made you halt on your feet.

"Who said you're not going to get that with me?"

"That would require feeling something for me other than lust, Billy." you snicked not fully turning around to face him, just your head.

"Who says I don't?"

"Madani, maybe?"

"She doesn't mean anything, y/n." He scoffed rolling his eyes.

"Of course you'd say something like this, Billy. Doesn't help though." As if him admitting to having meaningless sex with other women could help his case. Men. Fully done with this conversation you gave him one last look before turning away again.

"I know why you didn't eat those appetizers before." Again, after a few steps, his voice made you stop. This time, the implication of what he meant, sat heavily on your shoulders making you tense. Still, you didn't turn around.

That didn't deter him though.

"I know that you love them but they remind you of your grandfather. He used to make sure there would always be some of those at home whenever you went to visit him. And I know you haven't eaten them since-"

He stopped when your head whipping to him, eyes glaring.

He was right. You knew it, he knew it. But him strumentalising your beloved grandfather's death to get through to you? That was low, even for Billy.

Not only it called for you to acknowledge out loud that your grandfather wasn't there anymore but it also surprised you because you didn't think anyone would notice something so small.

"What are you saying, Billy?" Eyes glossy, like everything someone mentioned him, you tried your best to not let your voice waver.

"What I'm saying is that I care about you, y/n. I care enough to notice things. The tiniest details that you don't even know are there. Like that every time you're reading and something bad happens, you press your hand on your chest over your heart, as if you wanted to stop the pain from coming or something. Or that you always cook whenever you miss your family even if you never say it out loud. Or-"

"I get it Billy." you raised a hand to stop him. "You're observant. I knew that. That's basically what you do for a living. Not counting that you're a fucking sniper."

"Maybe," he conceded slowly taking a step in your direction, "I notice things, that's true. That doesn't mean that I store them in my mind, though."

"I care about you, y/n. A great deal. Enough to notice all the little things that make you you and enough to memorize them."

"I don't know if I can believe you, Billy. If you cared you wouldn't be going around sleeping with other women. And I know-" you added when you saw his mouth open to protest- " I know that technically we weren't together but still Billy. A technicality is not going to earn you my trust." Shrugging your shoulders you opted for being honest with him. You had never lied to him and you certainly weren't going to start now. Billy had never lied to you either, not that you were aware. And even if this thought should have reassured you, you were still hesitant about believing him.

"Then give me a chance to do so. Let me prove to you just how much I care about you and how little I care about everything else." He insisted, taking another step and then another until he was in front of you. Hands on your jaw, he delicately craned your neck so that your eyes could meet.

The height difference had always been a reason for jokes among you. It was no secret that Billy had a slight size kink, at least not to you, and so more often than not he'd use that.

Thumb slowly caressing your jaw, his eyes flickered between yours. They were full of hope, of promises but there was also a lot of vulnerability. Billy was not the type to be so forthcoming about his feelings. The fact that he had been with you, on a side street nonetheless, was a demonstration on its own.

Sighing, you knew you needed to decide. Yes, hearing Billy having sex with another woman had hurt you but you were not together. While that didn't make it hurt any less, it made the situation slightly less grave. He hadn't cheated on you, not really. You hadn't told him you wanted more. Hell, before that you didn't even know that you wanted more.

And now that you knew, now that he knew as well, here he was promising it to you. He wanted to give you exactly what you wanted. So could you really say no to him?

Of course not.

"Alright."

"Yeah?" a big smile grew on his face, his eyes twinkling in joy.

"Yeah, I'm going to give you a chance. Only one, Billy. So you better not mess this up." Poking his chest with a finger you warned him that this time around, things were going to be different.

"You're not going to regret that, babe." His eyes held a solemn promise. Just briefly though because soon, they were back to their usual mischief. Billy leaned to you, his lips meeting yours in a small kiss.

At first.

He kissed you soundly, his mouth perfectly on yours, building his tempo slowly. Then, you felt his tongue on your lower lip and you knew that things were about to escalate quickly.

Not that you minded of course, but it was not appropriate to do what you had in mind in the middle of the street.

"Billy," you moaned slightly leaning back to warn him that you couldn't get too carried away.

"Call that Jim guy," his mouth peppered small kisses along your jaw, "tell him that it's over. That he never stood a chance," he moved down on your neck.

"Yes."

"Let's go home so that I can show you how much more I can give you."His mouth had trailed back up and stopped so that it was hovering over your ear. His voice was low and breathy and husky and fuck it sent a wave of pleasure right in between your legs.

------

No sooner had you stepped over your threshold than Billy's hands were on you. The door barely closed, he pushed you against it. His hands cradled your face, effectively keeping you holding you in place while his mouth ravished you.

You gladly let him do as he pleased. Mouth opening to welcome his tongue while your hands gripped his jacket to keep you steady.

"Billy," you whimpered his name as his lips left yours. You tried to follow them by getting on your tiptoes but he didn't let you. Chuckling, he gave you another small kiss.

"Yes. Remember that it's me that it's making you feel this good. Me. Not Jim or whatever his name is, not anyone else. Me." He growled on your lips while one of his hands gripped the hair at the nape of your neck making you gasp.

Staring at his glowing dark pits you couldn't do anything other than nodding feverishly. You were at his mercy. Completely. And Billy knew that and it did nothing but please him to no end.

You'd always enjoyed whenever Billy was rough with you but him being jealous and kinda possessive too? Game changer.

Smirking at your reaction, his hands moved lower on your body until they hatched behind your knees pulling you up. Biting your lower lip, he swallowed your whimper for the friction once you wrapped your legs around his waist.

Billy didn't waste any more time, in quick long strides he was in your bedroom and threw you on the bed. You'd almost giggled when you bounced on it if it wasn't for the savage look in Billy's eyes.

Fuck, he looked so sexy. A sin.

For a moment, he just stared at you laid there waiting for him. A hand quickly wiped his face before he unbuckled his pants. Now it was your turn to stare at him. More like ogle but you knew he didn't mind.

Shedding his pants, he crawled over you until his face levelled yours.

"I'm going to give you exactly what you want. And then some more." He promised, nipping your earlobe. "You're never going to feel the need to look for other guys."

"There's no one else I'd rather be with, Billy."

Your hands trailed over his still clothed back before tangling his always perfectly styled hair. "Only you." You whispered in his ear.

If it wasn't for your hand on his back, you would have missed him tensing. "Say it again," he demanded, his head still in the crook of your neck.

"You're the only one I want, Billy." You repeated knowing fully well how he struggled with accepting love and affection. This meant to him just as much as it did to you. He was giving you the promise of commitment but so were you. And despite the fact that you had already been loyal to him, you knew how important it was for him to hear the words.

"There's no one else for me either, y/n. Never was, never will be." He raised his head to say this. It was a confirmation, yes, but it also felt so much more coming from him.

He had been telling you how much he cared about you since you left the bar but somehow, him saying it again now held more meaning.

"You promise?"

You felt childish and it was probably pathetic of you to ask him again. But this was you being vulnerable, letting him know that you needed him. And you trusted Billy.

"You're mine." He said instead. One of his hands coming to cradle the back of your head while the other closed around your right breast.

"And I'm yours."

And here it was, the promise, the reassurance you needed. His lips met yours in a bruising kiss. It was wet and more teeth and tongue than anything but it was passionate. You were claiming each other.

Not separating your lips, he used his hands to get rid of your clothes. While he unbuckled your pants, you took his shirt off. Him doing the same with yours while you pushed his brief down on his legs.

Once you were completely naked, Billy crawled back over you. His hands resting at the sides of your head. He was everywhere. You could feel him between your legs, your arms wrapped around his back, your vision field occupied by his beautiful face.

He was everywhere, he was everything.

"And now, I'm going to leave no room for doubt in your mind anymore." He whispered on your lips, his cock rubbing over your slit teasing you about what was to come.

You had asked him for a commitment and fuck if he didn't commit to it. All night long.

#billy russo #billy russo x reader #billy russo imagine #billy russo x you #billy russo x y/n #billy russo imagines #billy russo fic #billy russo one shot #billy russo angst #billy russo fluff #billy russo smut #the punisher #punisher

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stepituporstepitout · 4 years

Text

#16: food poisoning

the magnus archives // elias bouchard + gertrude robinson

Elias stumbles down two flights of stairs, into the archives and to the door of Gertrude’s office, all while he was coughing up blood. He falls against the door and it swings open, Elias falling into the office on his back. He rolls onto his side as he starts coughing again, drops of blood falling onto the floor and the front of his shirt. Gertrude jumps up out of her chair.

“Oh my God, Elias, wha- are yo- what the hell is going on?”

“Poison,” Elias makes out between coughs that shake his entire body.

“I’m driving you home,” Gertrude says, and picks up her coat, already putting it on. Elias shakes his head.

“No, you don–” He is interrupted by another cough, some blood droplets going as far as landing by Gertrude’s feet. She grimaces and Elias pretends it doesn't sting a little bit. He wipes his mouth and tries to take a breath without coughing. He does, and so he continues. “You don’t need to do that.”

“Well, you can’t drive yourself, you incompetent asshole [boom roasted].” Gertrude says as she turns off her computer.

“Ah, still jealous you didn't get the promotion, I see.” He says with a chuckle, she just glares at him.

“Now is really not the time, Elias.”

“You started it,” Elias mutters before he gets another coughing fit. This time, he actually covers his mouth [thank god, finally, no one wants your germs, good lord]. Gertrude rolls her eyes, walks over to Elias and holds out her hands.

“C’mon, let’s go,” she says. Elias groans and takes her hands, allowing himself to be helped up and leaning against her shoulder as they walk back up the stairs and out of the institute. Gertrude helps him into the backseat of her car where Elias lays down and curls up, not bothering with a seatbelt. As Gertrude starts driving, she casts worried glances at Elias through the rear-view mirror.

“What did you say happened?” Gertrude asks, glancing again at Elias through the mirror.

“Poison. Food poisoning, I think,” He says, coughing. Gertrude doesn't say anything just nods. Elias coughs again and it sounds bad. Really bad. Gertrude tries to cover the concern she feels.

“I swear to God, Elias, if you get blood on my car, I will kill you myself.”

“You wouldn’t.”

“Hmm, I think I would. Want to test me?”

“No,” another cough, “I’d rather not today.”

“Tomorrow, then?”

“If I feel better, I suppose.”

“Wonderful, I look forward to it,” And with that, they fall into a comfortable silence. Elias closes his eyes and tries not to get any more blood in Gertrude’s car.

Gertrude intentionally slams on the breaks when she parks her car. Elias’ head hits the back of her seat, and he falls into the space where his feet would go, in between the front and back seats.

“What the hell?”

“See, Elias, that’s what happens when you don’t put your seatbelt on.” Gertrude says with a smirk. He rolls his eyes and climbs up onto the seat.

“Wait,” Elias says as he looks around, “this isn’t my house.” His eyes land on Gertrude’s, a silent care to explain? She just shakes her head slightly and gets out of the car. The door beside Elias opens and Gertrude pulls him out.

“Yeah, it’s my house,” she says.

“I can see that, but… but why?” Gertrude just shrugs and helps Elias to the door. She unlocks the door and opens it, holding it open with her foot as she helps Elias inside.

“You can take the guest bedroom.” Gertrude says, and Elias stumbles next to her. She catches his elbows before he falls over.

“Sorry,” he says sheepishly.

“It’s fine,” Gertrude says, mostly just to shut him up. She brings Elias into the guest room and he just about collapses on the bed.

“Why am I here, Gertrude? Why couldn't you have brought me to my own house?”

“I don't know where you live. I’ll leave that to you, creepy boss,” Elias groans at that.

“Would you drop it for a day?”

“Drop what?” Gertrude asks, a sly smile on her lips.

“That! Just stop it. Please. I’m very ill, Gertrude, in case you can’t tell, and I don’t have much energy to deal with your bullshit.” Gertrude has a whole comeback planned in her head but decides against it, seeing the state that Elias is in.

He rolls onto his left side, grunts, rolls onto his right side, grunts again, and rolls to his back. He pulls a blanket over himself before kicking it off. He grunts yet again and wipes the sheen of sweat off his face.

“Are you okay?”

“No. I think I’m dying.” Gertrude chokes back a laugh. Elias glares at her as she tries not to smile. She clears her throat and regains her composure. Elias erupts in a fit of coughing, big, racking, shaking, coughs. The kind of coughs that only come out of very, very ill people.

“Seriously, Elias. Are you okay?”

“I am being serious, Gertrude,” he says, rolling onto his side to face her. He pulls his knees up to his chest and wraps his arms around them. “I don’t want to die,” he whispers, and it's all too vulnerable for the time and place. For the person he is.

Gertrude feels an ache in her chest and does breathing usually hurt this much? She pushes the feeling away as much as she can, but there is a small ache still present. It will become quite familiar in the next few years.

Gertrude clears her throat again.

“Well, let me know if you need anything,” she says, walking to the door.

“Don’t,” Elias says. Gertrude stops, hand on the door handle.

“Don’t what?”

“Don’t go. Please,” He looks up at Gertrude with those eyes. Those eyes, it’s always been the eyes. Gertrude feels that sharp pain again and this is not a normal way to feel about your coworkers. That’s something she doesn't want to deal with right now, maybe not ever.

“Goodnight, Elias,” she says, and walks out, leaving the door open just a crack.

Elias does not feel better the next day. When Gertrude walks into the guest room, holding a glass of water, Elias does not look much better, either. He looks quite a lot worse, actually.

“Good morning, Elias.” Gertrude says. Elias just groans. “Have some water,” she says. Elias swats the glass away and it crashes to the floor, breaking into tiny pieces.

“Shit, I’m sorry,” he says, and Gertrude sighs.

“It’s fine,” she says. “C’mon, let’s go, you’ve got an institute to run.”

“I can’t,” he says. his voice barely a whisper. “Everything hurts,”

“The Eye waits for no one. That includes you, Elias,” Gertrude says. Elias squeezes his eyes shut and shakes his head. “Let’s go, come on.”

“Gertrude, I really can’t,” he says, “my head is pounding and all my bones ache. Just leave me here.”

“Nope, we’re going,” Gertrude says, pulling Elias up by the shoulders. Once on his feet, he wobbles for a moment before tipping over. Gertrude catches him and swings an arm around his waist. Elias pushes her away and almost falls over in the process. “Come on, Elias, let me help you.” Elias mutters something under his breath and puts his arm over Gertrude’s shoulders. Gertrude puts one arms around his waist, holding him up, and presses the back of her other hand to his forehead. “My God, Elias, you’re burning up,”

“I know,” he says and Gertrude just gets more worried.

“You’re not coughing as much,” Gertrude says, glancing at Elias. He is laying on the back seat again and is breathing softly. He looks almost calm like that. Almost. His face is pale, more pale than he usually is and still far too pale for anyone in good health to be. But it’s very clear that he’s not in good health. He is covered in a thin layer of sweat and he’s shaking, maybe shivering.

“I guess I’ll have to hold off on killing you,” Gertrude says, and the chuckle that comes from Elias turns into a cough. He keeps his eyes closed.

“Are you cold? Or warm, or something, because I can open the windows or get you a blanket or someth–”

“The temperature is fine,” Elias says, not bothering to even open his eyes.

“Alright, if you’re sure,” she says.

Gertrude doesn't slam on the brakes when she parks outside the institute. Elias mouths thank you, but she wasn’t looking. She gets out and comes around the side of the car, opening the door next to Elias.

“Go to your office, now. Up you go.” She says, once they are inside. Elias nods and somehow somehow walks up the stairs. Gertrude smiles and heads down to the archives.

Elias comes stumbling down the stairs, not even two hours later and lays in the corner of Gertrude’s office for hours on end. She even brings him cups of tea throughout the day.

“Thank you, Gertrude. For everything.” Elias says as he takes a cup of tea. Gertrude suppresses a smile.

“Oh, shut up, you old bastard.”

Elias goes home with Gertrude again that night. She takes care of him and he finds himself going home with her still, even after he isn’t sick anymore.

#the magnus archives #tma #elias bouchard #gertrude robinson #i literally hate this sm #whatever

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rhosyn-du · 4 years

Text

Title: A Wonderful Institution Artist: @bidnezz Pairings: Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, various background pairings Word Count: ~53k Warnings: graphic depictions of violence, discrimination against Downworlders, reference to rape, Clave-typical homophobia, implied character death, minor character death Summary: Magnus doesn’t have time for this bullshit. Warlocks are disappearing in New York City—five people in less than three months—and Magnus is determined to find them and protect the rest of his people from whatever took them. He doesn’t have time for politics, and he certainly doesn’t have time for whatever nonsense the Clave is proposing about marrying a Shadowhunter to a Downworlder as part of the new Accords. He doesn’t really have time for a pretty Shadowhunter who’s surprisingly kind to warlock children, either, but, well, he’s always been good at multitasking.

Alec always knew he couldn’t have what he wanted, but he’s spent the nearly four years since the newly-appointed Consul recalled his parents to Idris without explanation making the best of what he can have. When life suddenly offers up almost everything Alec actually wants on a silver platter, he can’t quite bring himself to trust it, especially when it comes with a million caveats and a side of impending disaster. But he knows how to handle disasters, even if the return of the Circle on top of Clave secrets that could destroy the Accords is way beyond the disasters he’s used to fielding. Hope, on the other hand? He doesn’t know what to do with that.

This fic was created for the @malecdiscordserver Mini Bang 2020.

Chapter One

Magnus should have taken it as a sign when, instead of sending the information he asked for, the Spiral Council insisted upon an in-person meeting. He should, at the very least, have rescheduled cocktail night, but he wasn’t about to let politics or the headache that had been building behind his eyes all day interfere with standing traditions. If nothing else, he desperately needed someone to drink with.

“How is it,” Catarina asked as she slid into their usual booth, “that I just finished a ten-hour shift at the hospital, and you still look more worn out than I do?”

Magnus shook his head, raising his glass. “Drink first, my dear. Then talk. This is not a conversation anyone wants to have sober.”

“Cheers, then,” Catarina said, lifting her glass. “No Raphael tonight?”

“He’s overseeing the integration of a new fledgling. Ragnor also sent his regrets.”

“Ragnor has sent his regrets every week since 2003,” Catarina muttered into her cosmopolitan.

“And will continue to do so for years to come, I’m sure,” Magnus said.

“We’ll see about that. Come here.” Catarina motioned for Magnus to join her on her side of the booth.

Confused, Magnus joined her. “What are we—? Are we taking a selfie?”

“We,” she answered, smiling up at her phone, “are showing Ragnor how much fun we’re having without him, so he’ll be jealous and forced to show up for cocktail night sometime this decade.”

Magnus held up his drink, toasting the camera as Catarina snapped a photo, then frowned. “Since when does Ragnor have a smart phone?” he asked, watching Catarina tap out a text. “Or any kind of phone, for that matter.”

“Last month, I think?” she answered. “Raphael got it for him. Said texting was more convenient than fire messages, but honestly I think he just likes to give Ragnor a hard time about being such a Luddite.”

“But now I can’t tease him about still being stuck in the nineteenth century,” Magnus complained. “Also, how do you have his number and I don’t?”

“I’m guessing the same reason you look like you haven’t slept in the past month. You’ve been a little hard to get a hold of recently.”

Magnus made a noise of grumpy agreement.

“You want to talk about it?” Catarina asked.

“Why don’t you tell me about your week first?” Magnus suggested. “I’m still not ready to think about mine.”

Magnus was on his third bourbon on the rocks when Catarina finally got him talking about his own day and the disastrous meeting with the Spiral Council.

“Five warlocks missing in less than three months, and they brushed it aside like it’s nothing,” Magnus told her. “They called me there like they actually had information, but no, just ‘we haven’t heard anything, we’ll keep an ear out’ and then straight into this absolute nonsense with the Clave.” He drained the last of his glass and conjured another, too worked up to bother walking over to the bar to order. “As if it’s not suspicious enough that they want to renew the Accords years earlier than scheduled, as if marrying a Downworlder to a Shadowhunter as part of the terms isn’t among the most terrible ideas in the Clave’s grand library of terrible ideas.”

“Let me guess,” Catarina said. “They want you to be a part of the negotiations?”

“Oh, no,” Magnus said, waving his glass in a way that would, in anyone else’s hand, have sent the drink sloshing over the sides. “If they wanted that, it would be annoying enough, but they actually had the gall to suggest I should put my name in for consideration as the Downworld representative in this disaster-in-the-making political marriage.”

Catarina made a strangled noise that might have been outrage but might also have just been choking on her drink. “They actually…” She shook her head. “The Spiral Council wants you to marry a Shadowhunter? And they think this will prevent war with the Clave?”

Magnus shook his head. “No, no, they don’t actually want me to marry anyone. They just want my name on the list. Something about how much it would mean to have such a visible sign of my support. Which they will not get, because, as I explained to them repeatedly and at great length, I do not support any of this. And that’s not even getting into my lack of confidence in their assurances that I wouldn’t be chosen.”

“They’re probably right about that,” Catarina told him. “Rumor is the Clave is putting forward one of the Lightwood children, and I can’t imagine a world where Maryse and Robert Lightwood would allow one of their offspring to marry you.”

“Somehow, the council failed to mention that part.” Probably because they knew how Magnus would react. This lunacy was bad enough without the Clave deciding the child of two former Circle members, one of whom was rumored to be the Consul’s personal enforcer, was the best person to make a political alliance with the Downworld. “That’s a bullet I’m more than happy to have dodged.”

“What, you don’t see yourself having a mad, passionate romance with a Lightwood?” Catarina teased.

Magnus wrinkled his nose in distaste. “As amusing as it would be to see the look on Maryse Lightwood’s face if I did, no. I would rather marry a Ravener demon.” He took a long pull of his whiskey. “I would rather marry Lorenzo Rey.” He drained his glass, setting it down on the table with a resounding thump. “I would rather see acid wash jeans as the height of fashion for the next three and a half centuries.”

“Only three and a half?” Catarina laughed. “Not four?”

“Even a Lightwood couldn’t be that bad,” Magnus told her. “Another round?”

“That’s all for me. I’ve got another shift in the ER tomorrow, and the last thing I need is a hangover to go with it. I’m happy to keep you company, though. Seems like you could use it.”

“Your company is very much appreciated, as always,” Magnus said. “I’ll just—”

Magnus’s train of thought as well as his sentence were effectively derailed by the arrival of a fire message. He plucked it from the air with a frown that only deepened as he read.

“It looks like that’s the last drink for me, as well,” Magnus said, gathering his coat from the seat beside him.

“Anything I can help with?” Catarina asked, nodding toward the paper in Magnus’s hand.

“I’ll certainly take it if you’re offering,” Magnus answered slowly. “This could be very bad.” He couldn’t, after all, think of any good reason Iris Rouse would be calling him for help.

“Alec, you aren’t listening to me.”

Alec took a deep, calming breath, focusing on fastening the buckles of his thigh holster rather than how very done he was having this conversation for the hundredth time.

“I am listening, Iz,” he said, sliding the last buckle into place. “I just still disagree with you. And since this is my life and not yours, my opinion is the one that matters.”

Izzy grabbed his arm, forcing him to face her. “This can’t actually be what you want. If Mom and Dad are pressuring you into this—”

Alec snorted. “Trust me, Mom and Dad aren’t pressuring me into anything.” It wasn’t exactly a lie. They weren’t pressuring him into this, not really. His mother made her disapproval quite clear, for all that she’d also said this marriage was necessary for the updated Accords.

Izzy’s eyes told him she wasn’t convinced. “I know Mom has said some things about how you should be looking for a wife,” she said.

“I’m pretty sure Mother meant I should marry a nice Shadowhunter girl,” Alec said. “Come on, Iz, do you really see our parents pressuring me into marrying a Downworlder? Even for the Accords?”

“Then why?” Her hand on his arm was a gentle pressure now, cajoling rather than demanding. “You keep saying this is your decision, but you won’t tell me why you’re making it.”

Alec sighed. This wasn’t something he wanted to talk about, not even with Izzy, but it was clear she wasn’t going to let it drop until he did. “Because someone needs to do it, and I at least won’t resent it.”

“Are you sure about that, big brother?” Izzy’s eyes were intent on his, and Alec both loved and hated how she could always see his deepest doubts and fears, even when he’d pushed them down so far he could almost forget them himself. “You deserve to be happy, Alec. You deserve to fall in love with someone who loves you just as much. And I think that’s what you want, too.”

“It doesn’t matter what I want,” he said, shaking off her hand. “This is what I’ve chosen.” This was what he could have. At least in an explicitly political marriage to a Downworlder, no one would expect him to act like he was in love with his wife or ask questions if they didn’t have children.

If he were very lucky, maybe his future wife would be open to adoption.

“But you can still make a different choice!” Izzy insisted.

“Isabelle,” he said. “Drop it.”

Izzy opened her mouth to speak again, but Alec cut her off. “Come on, we’ve got a mission.”

He stalked out of the room before Izzy could say anything else, but her irritated huff of breath as she followed him to the ops center told Alec she wasn’t anywhere near as done with the conversation as he was.

They picked up the trail of Ravener demons just east of Prospect Park. Signs indicated maybe six or seven in the pack, which was worrisome since the original sighting was of more than twice that number.

“I can trace the trail back, see if it splits,” Jace suggested. “You guys follow this one and I’ll catch up with you.”

“All right,” Alec said after a moment’s hesitation, “but if it does split, call the Institute and have them send another team, then catch up with me and Iz. Do not go after the other group on your own.”

“Obviously,” Jace said, completely at odds with the hint of a smirk that told Alec that was exactly what he’d been planning to do.

Alec just barely refrained from rolling his eyes.

A quarter mile on, the trail split again, and Alec nodded to Izzy, indicating he’d follow left and she should follow right. He didn’t bother telling his sister to be careful. She might not always be exactly prudent, but she was very good at gauging what she could and couldn’t handle in a fight and had significantly better self-preservation instincts than Alec’s parabatai.

Alec made it another three blocks before he caught sight of one of the demons, darting from behind a dumpster to slink down a dark alleyway. Activating his night vision rune, he pulled an arrow from his quiver and turned down the alleyway after the demon.

There was no movement in the alley, no sound to be heard over the ambient noise of the surrounding streets. Alec scanned each dumpster that lined the alley, each pile of debris, searching for the place the Raveners had to be hiding. Ravener demons were fast, but not fast enough to make it to the far end of the alley so quickly.

A small sound drew Alec’s attention. It wasn’t the scuffling he expected, but instead something that sounded almost like a tiny, muffled sob. He focused on the area it came from, arrow nocked and ready.

It took Alec a few seconds to really register what he was seeing, sticking out from behind a pile of broken-down boxes. The toe of a small shoe. As he watched, the shoe retreated behind the boxes.

Alec lowered his bow as he moved toward the pile of boxes. Not all the way, because there was still a Ravener around here somewhere, but enough that he could approach without pointing it directly at the hiding child.

He debated speaking, which might put the child more at ease, but could also attract the attention of the Ravener, and any of its buddies that might be hanging around. He didn’t know who the demons were hunting, either. With so many at once, it was almost certain they’d been summoned by a warlock to track and probably capture or kill someone, and Alec couldn’t begin to imagine why someone would go to that kind of trouble for a kid, so they probably weren’t the target, but he didn’t want to take the chance that he was wrong, especially since the kid was clearly hiding from something.

Splitting the difference between the two options, Alec dropped to a crouch when he drew even with the pile of boxes and spoke in a soft voice.

“Hi there.”

He waited a beat, and when no reply seemed forthcoming, continued. “You don’t have to come out if you don’t want to, but this isn’t a safe place to be right now.”

Still, nothing.

“Okay, well, if you don’t want to come out, is it okay if I come back there with you for a minute? I just want to make sure you’re safe.”

Again, silence. Alec waited.

After at least a full minute of silence, Alec heard movement behind the pile of boxes, and suddenly he was faced with a terrified-looking little girl. She looked to be maybe six or seven years old, if Alec had to guess, and even though fear was evident in her eyes and posture, she met Alec’s eyes without flinching and there were tiny blue flames flickering across the fingers of one small hand.

Alec forced himself to keep a relaxed posture, even as he kept alert for any sign of the Ravener demon. It was just barely possible that the Raveners were after a warlock child, although Alec still couldn’t imagine who would send a pack that size after a kid, even a warlock kid.

“That’s a good hiding place,” he said conversationally. “I almost didn’t notice you.”

The girl regarded him with somber eyes.

“Can I walk you back home to make sure you get there safely?” he asked.

This time, she shook her head emphatically, but the flames around her fingers died, which Alec took as a good sign.

“Okay,” he said. “We can stay here for a while if you want, but I need you to promise that if anything happens, you’ll get behind me, okay? There are some scary things out here, and you don’t have to face them by yourself.”

The girl cocked her head to the side, considering, then nodded.

“Cool gills,” Alec commented, nodding at the girl’s neck. That got him a tiny, shy smile. “I’m Alec.”

The girl chewed her bottom lip, then said softly, “I’m Madzie.”

Before Alec could respond, a Ravener sprang from the shadows of a nearby dumpster, heading straight toward them. In one smooth move, Alec turned on his knee, placing himself squarely between the girl and the demon, and let an arrow fly.

He didn’t bother to watch the arrow find its mark—he knew it would—already turning to loose another arrow at one of the two demons approaching from the other direction. The second demon was too close to use his bow by that time, so Alec pulled his seraph blade from the sheath along his thigh and rose from his crouch to drive the blade straight into the demon’s chest. He felt a faint, sharp pain in his knee, probably a rock or piece of broken glass he’d kneeled on. He’d deal with it later.

A sound from the mouth of the alley had Alec spinning again, seraph blade abandoned in favor of his bow once again. He had an arrow nocked and ready before he properly registered what he was seeing. The man standing in front of him, watching him with open curiosity and something else that made Alec’s breath catch in his throat, was most definitely not a Ravener demon.

The door to Iris Rouse’s home stood open several inches when Magnus and Catarina stepped out of the portal on her front stoop. It hadn't been broken down or torn from its hinges or apparently forced open in any way, which Magnus might have considered a good sign under different circumstances. Given the recent disappearances, however, the door hanging peacefully ajar seemed ominous.

The two warlocks entered cautiously, but the house was eerily silent and apparently empty, with nothing to indicate that even a struggle had taken place. It was an all too familiar scene.

Magnus swore softly. It wasn't just a missing warlock this time, though. There was also the matter of Iris's message. Please, you have to save the children.

“We’ll need to search the house,” he told Catarina. “Not that I expect to find more here than I have anywhere else.”

“You never know,” she said. “Today could be your lucky day.”

“Seems unlikely, given how the day has gone so far.”

They decided to search top to bottom, and both agreed that splitting up would be a terrible idea. The first two rooms yielded nothing, exactly as Magnus expected. The third door, however, gave the first sign of something out of place. For one thing, it held two sets of bunk beds and a crib, plus a number of stuffed animals and a toy box tucked away in a corner. For another, the window stood open wide, white lace curtains fluttering in the breeze.

Catarina looked over the room, eyebrows raised. “Did you know anything about Iris raising kids?”

Magnus shook his head. “I haven’t spoken to Iris Rouse in over two centuries. I knew she was living in Brooklyn, obviously, but we were never exactly friendly, and we’ve been happy to keep right on avoiding each other. I guess this does give some context for her message, though.”

Catarina made a noise of agreement, kneeling to examine a stuffed rabbit that lay on the floor.

Magnus turned to look out the window, where a tree branch bobbed lazily in the wind. It wasn’t sturdy enough to hold his weight, but he thought it just might have been sturdy enough for someone smaller to grab a hold of and shimmy down, if they were determined enough.

“I think—”

A faint sound caught Magnus’s attention, causing him to pause mid-sentence. Catarina nodded, and gestured toward the closet. She’d heard it, too.

Magnus made a motion for Catarina to stay behind him as he approached the closet door. He wasn’t sure what to expect when he used his magic to fling the closet open, but it definitely was not the mundane woman who launched herself at him, teeth bared and fists flying.

Magnus stepped back, raising a hand to restrain her with magic. For a moment, the house was still and silent again. Then, the silence was broken by the unmistakable wail of an infant.

“You can’t take him,” the woman snarled, struggling against her magical bonds. “I won’t let you.”

It was a ridiculous thing for her to say. A mundane woman—barely more than a girl, Magnus realized, now that he was really looking at her—didn’t have a chance against two warlocks. But there was no doubt in Magnus’s mind that she meant what she said. If he and Catarina tried to take the baby nestled among the blankets at the bottom of the closet, this woman would do everything in her power to stop them.

“We’re not here to take anyone,” Magnus said in his most soothing voice.

“We’re friends of Iris’s,” Catarina added. Not exactly true, but close enough. “I’m Catarina, and this is Magnus. We’re here to help.”

The woman still looked suspicious, but when neither of them made any move toward the closet, she stopped fighting the bonds. Magnus released her as soon as she looked like she wasn’t in danger of trying to commit violence upon him. She immediately ran to the closet and scooped the infant up in her arms.

“I’m Leigh,” the woman told them, rocking the baby as its cries subsided. “They took Iris, and the children, too. I hid Noah, and I think Madzie might have gotten away, but I don’t know. There were just so many of them.”

“Who did?” Magnus asked. “Who took Iris and the children?”

Leigh frowned, her face going slightly vacant. “I don’t know. There were so many of them. They weren’t there, and then suddenly they were, but…” She looked at him, face all confusion. “That doesn’t make any sense.”

Which, of course, it wouldn’t, to a mundane. Except this mundane was apparently living with a warlock. Or at least babysitting for one. So, when the kidnappers dropped the glamor that kept them hidden, it seemed to her that they appeared out of nowhere.

Magnus had been paying more attention to Leigh than to the child, listening to her confused explanation, but he caught Catarina’s pointed look at him, then at the baby in the woman’s arms. She, at least, had been paying attention to the child.

Magnus glanced at the infant. At first, he didn’t see it, but then the baby blinked, and a second set of eyelids, like those of a raptor, closed across its eyes. The infant was a warlock.

“You’ve been through something very traumatic,” Catarina said, slipping into the voice Magnus had heard her use with patients. “It’s normal to be confused. Why don’t you sit down for a minute?”

“I…” Leigh still looked dazed. “Yes, thank you.”

“You said the people who came here took Iris and the children,” Magnus said. “What can you tell us about the children? It could help us locate them.” Not that he had high hopes, if they were warlocks like the baby. He hadn’t been able to track a single warlock who had disappeared. He couldn’t even sense their magic, which meant they were most likely dead, although no bodies had turned up.

“Madzie is the oldest,” Leigh said. “She went out the window when those things—” She stopped, shaking her head. “When the people broke in, and we saw them grab Dierdre and Indra. They must have broken in. I wanted to go, too, but I didn’t think the tree could hold my weight, and anyway I couldn’t climb down with Noah, and I couldn’t leave him.” Her voice was climbing, becoming more panicked.

“So, you took him and hid in the closet,” Magnus finished for her. “It was a good plan. You said Madzie escaped out the window?” he asked, latching on to the one piece of information that might be useful. If a child had escaped, there was still a chance he might be able to find her.

Leigh nodded. “I heard them come into the room after. I thought for sure they were going to find us, but they never came near the closet. I heard them follow Madzie out the window.” She frowned. “Except, that doesn’t make sense, either. Because an adult shouldn’t be able to climb down that tree, so maybe…” She trailed off, shaking her head.

Adult humans, no. But demons? There were plenty of demons small enough to climb down that tree. Hell, there were plenty of demons that could scale the side of the building, and several varieties that could fly.

“Can you show me something of Madzie’s?” Magnus asked. If he had something of the girl’s, if he wasn’t too late, he could track her. He might even be able to find her before the demons did. Or at least find the demons.

“Something of— Why?”

“Something familiar to comfort her when we find her,” Catarina lied smoothly.

“Oh,” Leigh said. “Oh, of course. There,” she said, pointing to the stuffed rabbit Catarina had noticed earlier. “That’s Mr. Flopsy. He’s Madzie’s favorite.”

“Thank you, dear,” Magnus said, grabbing the stuffed toy. He looked at Catarina. “I’m going to look for the girl. As soon as she’s recovered enough, take them back to the loft. They’ll be safe there while we figure out what’s going on.”

“We’ll see you there,” Catarina answered. Then, when Magnus hesitated, “We’ll be fine. Go.”

Magnus had no trouble at all picking up Madzie’s trail, which was on the one hand convenient, but on the other hand meant the demons probably weren’t having much trouble tracking her, either. The one solely good piece of news was that Magnus was able to recognize the girl’s magic from the residue on the toy, and he could still feel its echo out somewhere in the city. If the demons chasing Madzie had found her, at least they hadn’t killed her, yet.

It didn’t take him long to pick up the trail of the Ravener demons following Madzie, either. A warlock had scrubbed all sense of their presence from Iris’s house, but the trail popped up clear as day at the end of the block. Which suggested that whoever was controlling these demons hadn’t gone with them after the girl. They must have gone with Iris and the other children, wherever they’d taken them.

The trail led him half a mile east of Prospect Park before he heard the distinctive growl of a Ravener about to attack. Magnus ran toward the alleyway from where the sound had come, magic ready at his fingertips, only to stop dead in his tracks when he rounded the corner just in time to watch a Shadowhunter neatly dispatch three Ravener demons in rapid succession.

The man’s movements were fluid and efficient, arrows hitting their marks dead on before taking down the final demon with a seraph blade in a move that looked almost effortless even as his forearms flexed in a way that Magnus couldn’t help but appreciate. More impressive than the man’s skill at taking down demons, though, was the way he did so all while keeping himself between the threat he faced and the young girl behind him. The young warlock girl.

Shadowhunters were pledged to protect the world from demons, and even the most repugnant ones Magnus had the misfortune of meeting seemed to take that job seriously, but he’d met precious few who would put forth even the slightest effort to protect a warlock, not even from a demon.

Then the Shadowhunter was turning to face him, and Magnus found himself struck once again, because the man was stunning, with bright hazel eyes, full lips, and a jawline that could cut glass. He also had an arrow trained straight at Magnus’s heart.

Magnus searched frantically for something to say. Something witty and flirtatious, perhaps. Or something dignified and professional, as would befit the High Warlock of Brooklyn under such circumstances. Or just something that would reassure the Shadowhunter that Magnus wasn’t a threat.

What actually came out of his mouth was, “Who are you?”

For the briefest instant, Magnus thought he could see the hint of a bewildered smile on the Shadowhunter’s lips, but it was gone almost as soon as it appeared.

“Shouldn’t I be asking you that question?” the Shadowhunter countered. Then his eyes flickered to something behind Magnus, and Magnus whirled around to face a truly staggering number of Ravener demons pouring into the mouth of the alley just as an arrow flew past his shoulder to hit one of the demons in the chest.

“Kill demons now, introductions later?” Magnus suggested, tossing a ball of fire at the closest demon.

“Sounds like a plan,” the Shadowhunter agreed. “Stay behind me,” he instructed the little girl. “Keep your back to the wall.”

They fought surprisingly well together for two people who hadn’t even known each other long enough to exchange names. Without discussing it, Magnus handled the demons who managed to get into close range of their little group, while the Shadowhunter took down those further back.

“You know,” Magnus said as he watched another demon burn to a satisfying crisp, “normally I’d ask what a guy like you is doing in a place like this, but I get the feeling you might just be a killing demons in dark alleys kind of guy.”

“Not as many dark alleys as you might expect,” the Shadowhunter said. “And usually not this many demons at once.”

“Or with quite such charming company?” Magnus suggested. Only two left. “Because I certainly don’t.”

“Well, you’ve done a pretty decent job of proving you’re not the one who summoned the demons, at least.”

The Shadowhunter’s arrow hit one of the remaining two demons just as his own flames took down the other.

Magnus gave the Shadowhunter a sidelong glance. “Glad to know being in mortal peril helped with my credibility.”

Magnus turned to face the little girl, who was clinging to the leg of the Shadowhunter’s pants and crouched down to her level. She shrunk back from him, and after a moment’s hesitation, he unglamored his eyes. “Hi, my name is Magnus. Are you Madzie?”

The girl eyed him warily, then nodded once.

“Iris called me for help when the demons attacked your house, but I didn’t get there before you left. I’m sorry I wasn’t faster.” He pulled the stuffed rabbit out of his coat. “Leigh said you’d want Mr. Flopsy when I found you.”

The girl grabbed Mr. Flopsy and watched him shyly. “You know Nana?” she asked in a quiet voice. “Can you take me to her?”

“I’m sorry, sweet pea,” Magnus said, “but I don’t know where your nana is right now. I’m going to do everything I can to find her, though. And I can take you where Leigh and Noah are now if you want. My friend Catarina is taking care of them.”

Madzie looked at him for a long moment, then up at the Shadowhunter. “Are you coming?”

The Shadowhunter’s face showed a flicker of surprise before melting into a soft smile. “Yeah, I can come. I just need to let the rest of my team know where I’m going.” He glanced at Magnus, still smiling, and oh, Magnus was in trouble. “Where am I going?”

“My loft,” Magnus answered, too aware of the answering smile he had absolutely no control over. “In Brooklyn Heights. I’m Magnus, by the way.”

“Alec,” the Shadowhunter answered, his smile widening and making him somehow even more stunning. “I’m gonna,” he gestured over his shoulder awkwardly, eyes never leaving Magnus’s.

“Right,” Magnus said. “Call your team.” Finally, when it was nearly over, his day was starting to look like it just might make up for a little of the shitshow it had been.

“Yeah,” Alec said. And then his legs buckled beneath him.

Acting on instinct, Magnus reached out to steady him. Alec fell against his side, unable to get his feet back under him, and Magnus very intentionally pushed the way Alec’s back muscles felt beneath his hand to the back of his mind with a mental note to revisit that later, preferably not in the middle of a crisis.

“Sorry,” Alec muttered. “Sorry, I can’t—”

“There’s nothing to apologize for,” Magnus told him. “Are you injured?”

“Left knee,” Alec said, wincing. “Thought I cut it on some glass. Just need to—” He pulled out a stele and activated his iratze.

Nothing happened.

“I’m going to wager a guess,” Magnus said, leading Alec to lean against the nearest wall, “that it was not glass. Let me take a look.”

“You don’t have to do that,” Alec protested. “I just need to get back to the Institute.”

“Nonsense,” Magnus waved him off. “I’m right here, and it’s less effort to just heal whatever is wrong with you than portal you back to the Institute.” Probably. Maybe. “Besides, I owe you for rescuing Madzie.”

Alec’s voice was sharp when he answered, “You don’t owe me for that. She needed help and I was here. And it’s my job,” he added, an obvious afterthought.

“Then,” Magnus said, crouching down to examine Alec’s knee, “consider this my way of saying thank you.”

It didn’t take him long to find it: a small wound just beneath Alec’s thigh holster. Madzie crowded in beside him, and he let her look, hoping the small size of the wound would ease her fears that Alec was seriously hurt.

“Demon venom,” Magnus concluded. “Not much or you wouldn’t still be conscious, but it’s been in your system too long for your iratze to help. I’ve got a potion that will take care of it back at the loft.”

It was a testament to how badly the venom was affecting him that Alec just nodded instead of arguing. Or maybe he really did take Magnus’s line about a thank you at face value. Either way, he let Magnus put an arm around him and help him off the wall.

Magnus was about to open a portal when two more Shadowhunters dashed into the alley.

“Alec!” the dark-haired woman cried, rushing toward them.

“‘M fine, Iz,” Alec mumbled, very clearly not fine. “I’ve got everything under control,” he explained, before promptly passing out on Magnus’s shoulder.

#malec #magnus bane #alec lightwood #fanfic

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mrsevans1328 · 6 years

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215 Cute Prompt List

Please feel free to submit a request and reblog. Just some basic rules:

1) This list is purely for fluff blurbs/imagines. I am working on a different list for smut prompts/blurbs etc. So please do not request any smut from this list, thank you

2) Pick a prompt (obviously), and a character from the list below :

Shawn Mendes - Dylan O’Brien/Stiles Stilinski - any Teen Wolf character or their respective actor/actress - Tom Holland/Peter Parker

3) Please do not request a prompt that I have already written or am in the process of writing. Finished prompts will have a “ ** “ by it, works in progress will have “ ~ “ by it, followed by who the character in the blurb is. Only reason for this is there are over 200 prompts available to choose from. Once the list gets fuller, I will make repeats available.

***Note: I did not come up with these prompts on my own!! I do not claim ownership for any of these prompts!! I pulled all of these prompts from a mixture of different prompt lists already on Tumblr.

Thank you for the submissions, I love you all!! xxx

1. “ Not you again.. “

2. “ Leave me alone. “

3. “ Why do you hate me? ”

4. “ I lost the baby. ” ~ Shawn Mendes

5. “ I don’t need you anymore. ”

6. “ We cant keep this up forever. ”

7. “ You’re a disappointment. ”

8. “ Don’t die on me– Please. ”

9. “ I never meant to hurt you. ” ~ Dylan O’Brien

10. “ Are you upset with me? ” ** - Shawn Mendes

11. “ I’m going to kill you! ”

12. “ Please don’t hurt me like this. ”

13. “ Dont call this number again. “

14. “ Why did you spare me? ”

15. “ I’m sick. ”

16. “ I’m dying. ”

17. “ I wish i’d never met you. ”

18. “ I thought we were family!”

19. “ There was never an us. ”

20. “ I fucked up. ”

21. “ I came to say goodbye. ”

22. “ I don’t deserve to be loved. ”

23. “ About the baby… Its yours. ” ~ Shawn Mendes

24. “ Dance with me! ”

25. “ Isn’t this amazing? ”

26. “ I wish we could stay like this forever. ”

27. “ Will you marry me? ”

28. “ I’m pregnant. ” ** - Shawn Mendes

29. “ I’m going to keep you safe. ”

30. “ Do you trust me? ”

31. “ Can I kiss you right now? ”

32. “ You’re cute when you’re angry. ”

33. “ We’d make such a cute couple. ”

34. “ I want to take care of you. ”

35. “ Can we cuddle? ”

36. “ It’s lonely here without you. ”

37. “ Shut up and kiss me already. ” ** - Shawn Mendes

38. “ Is that my shirt? ”

39. “ How did we get here? ”

40. “ You own my heart. ”

41. “ You’d be a great dad. ”

42. “ I want to protect you. ”

43. “ You’re so beautiful. ”

44. “ Is that a new perfume? ”

45. “ Stop being so cute. ”

46. “ You’re making me blush! ”

47. “ You’re teasing me again… ”

48. “ This is why I fell in love with you. ”

49. “ Oh, Are you ticklish? ”

50. “ Of course I remembered! ”

51. “ You’re one hell of a guy. ”

52. “ Are you jealous? ”

53. “ Stop hogging all the blankets! ”

54. “ Are you drunk? ”

55. “ We cant go in there… ”

56. “ Well this is just great. ”

57. “ Don’t touch me. ”

58. “ Not sure if you could tell, but I’m not exactly a people person. ”

59. “ I don’t remember that! ”

60. “ Get that thing away from me! ”

61. “ You owe me. ”

62. “ Do you believe in ghosts? ”

63. “ Are you hitting on me? ”

64. “ You did what?! ”

65. “ Why are you bleeding? ”

66. “ Where did all these puppies come from?”

67. “ Don’t make me come over there myself! ”

68. “ That wasn’t funny. ”

69. “ Are you mad at me? ”

70. “ Can I borrow that book of yours?”

71. “ Let me help you with that. ”

72. “ Take that back! ”

73. “ I brought you your coffee. ”

74. “ Don’t fuck this up. ”

75. “ I haven’t slept in four days… ” ~ Shawn Mendes

76. “ Your turn to do the dishes. ”

77. “ Was I really that drunk? ”

78. “Give me back my phone! ”

79. “ Are you cold? ”

80. “ This place gives me the creeps. "

81. “ It’s just your imagination. ”

82. “ Stop being such a baby. ”

83. “ Go back to bed. ”

84. “ Are you okay? ”

85. “ What on earth are you wearing? ”

86. “ Stop texting me weird stuff so late at night. ”

87. “ Put me down! ”

88. “ There’s only one bed… ” ~ Shawn Mendes

89. “ It isn’t what it looks like! Okay.. Maybe it is… ”

90. “ How did I loose it? ”

91. “ I read your diary. ” ** - Shawn Mendes

92. “Just remember if we get caught, you’re deaf and I don’t speak English.” ~ Shawn Mendes

93. “I love you. You enormously stubborn pain in the ass.” ~ Shawn Mendes

94. “And you wonder why you’re still single.” ~ Shawn Mendes

95. “That’s a little melodramatic, don’t you think?”

96. “Were you dropped on your head?”

97. “Sorry. I don’t speak skank.”

98. “If I survive, can I go home?”

99. “My middle finger salutes you.”

100. “I don’t think I could ever stab someone. I mean, let’s be honest. I can barely get the straw in the Capri Sun.”

101. “I don’t have enough middle fingers to let you know how I feel.”

102. “Oh darling. Go buy a brain.”

103. “Somebody’s cranky.” “Somebody needs to shut up.” ~ Shawn Mendes

104. “Excuse me. I have to go make a scene.”

105. “What did I tell you about calling her/him the devil?” “That it’s offensive to the devil?”

106. “I heard that!” “You were supposed to!”

107. “I need therapy after this.”

108. “You didn’t get in trouble for lying. You got in trouble for lying badly.”

109. “I turned out liking you a lot more that I originally planned.”

110. “If history repeats itself, I am so getting a dinosaur.”

111. “I’m afraid I’ve been thinking…” “A dangerous pastime.”

112. “I’d explain it to you, but you’re brain would explode.”

113. “Sarcasm is the body’s natural reaction to stupidity.”

114. “Don’t look in her eyes, she might steal your soul.”

115. “She’s hot, but she’s evil.”

116. “Do I regret it? Yes. Would I do it again? Probably.”

117. “I already know that I’m going to hell. At this point it’s really go big or go home.”

118. “You’re going to burn in a very special level of hell. A level they reserve for child molesters, animal abusers and people who talk at the theater.”

119. “I’m not a damsel in distress. I’m a damsel doing damage.”

120. “So stick that in your juice box and suck it.”

121. “A little gasoline… blowtorch… no problem.”

122. “Good, bad, I’m the one with the gun.”

123. “I know you can’t kill anybody, ‘cause I can’t kill anybody.”

124. “You’re insane, but you might also be brilliant.”

125. “Why does everyone assume the worst of me.” “It saves time.”

126. “I like you. You’re different.”

127. “Wow, somebody needs a Happy Meal.”

128. “I didn’t do it!” “Then why are you laughing?” “Because whoever did it is a freaking genius.”

129. “Idiots. I’m surrounded by idiots.”

130. “Well behaved woman rarely make history.”

131. “The universe may not always play fair, but at least it’s got a hell of a sense of humor.”

132. “You haven’t even seen my bad side yet.”

133. “How’s life treating you?” “Like I ran over it’s dog.”

134. “Rule number one: don’t bother sucking up. I already hate you, that’s not going to change.”

135. “You make no sense to me.” “Welcome to my life.”

136. “Damn, you’re strong for a little thing.”

137. “I made a new friend today.” “Real or imaginary?” “Imaginary.”

138. “Where have you been all my life?” “Hiding from you.”

139. “Do us a favor… I know it’s difficult for you… but please, stay here, and try no to do anything…stupid.”

140. “I know most people don’t like me; I don’t care, I don’t like most people.”

141. “I didn’t steal it. I permanently borrowed it.”

142. “If you pull out my earphones, I will pull out your lungs.”

143. “Are you crying?" "No, I’m impersonating a fountain.”

144. “You’re kinda anti-social, you know that?”

145. “My advice is much more subtle. Stop being an ass.”

146. “I’m just gonna pack up and go straight to hell now.”

147. “My ex? Yeah, I’d still hit that. Except this time it would be with a car or baseball bat.”

148. “And just like everything else we do around here, it’s about to get weirder.”

149. “Such big evil in such a little thing.”

150. “Why do I still like you, knowing you’re a total asshole?”

151. “And hello to you too… little home wrecker.”

152. “I don’t need anger management. I need people to stop pissing me off.”

153. “What doesn’t kill me might make me kill you.”

154. “In another life, I think I was in a mental institution.”

155. “I’m not crazy. I’m just interesting.”

156. “This is fun.” “Seriously, we’re trying to hide a body.”

157. “ She’s not yours. “

158. “ There is no us, there never was. “

159. “ Why didn’t you tell me? “

160. “ If lies keep spewing from those lips then i’ m walking out that door. “

161. “ Are you ever going to listen? “

162. “ Don’t leave me. Don’t you dare leave me. “

163. “ Shhh. I know. “ ~ Tom Holland

164. “ Tell me a story. “

165. “ Leave. Before we wake up regretting what we’ve done. “

166. “ All he ever did was use you. Why can’t you see that? “

167. “ Alcohol’s the only constant in my life. “

168. “ I was doing fine. Really, and then you waltz back in like you didn’t break my heart. “

169. “ You’re married!! “

170. “ He’s a fuck-boy and he’s never going to treat you better than this. “

171. “ H-how long? “

172. “ You still wear my hoodie? “

173. “ I’m too sober for this bullshit. “

174. “ How did you imagine our future together? “

175. “ That was supposed to be me, not him. “ ~ Dylan O’Brien

176. “ I didn’t have a choice. “

177. “ Compromise. "

178. “ His finger was right on the trigger but he wasn’t fast enough. “

179. “ Leave him and marry me. “

180. “ It’s okay if you have to go. “

181. “ Always and forever. “

182. “ You always cared more about her than you ever did about me. “

183. “ You had a kid and decided to walk out. You don’t get to call the shots round here. “ ~ Shawn Mendes

184. “ I fell for you. “

185. “ Daddy, how did you and mommy fall in love? “

186. “ I‘m never going to be good enough for you, am i? “

187. “ He already boarded the plane. We’re too late. “

188. “ That look in his eyes. That was enough to tell me he didn’t feel the same anymore. “

189. “ Who the hell abandons someone they ‘love’? “

190. “ The moment you saw me as a bet was the moment you fucked up. “

191. “ Meet me upstairs in 10. “

192. “ One more chance. “

193. “ It doesn’t have to be that way. Come with me. “

194. “ I don’t love you. “

195. “ You were my everything. “

196. “ You’re never seeing either of us again. “

197. “ Trust you? You don’t know the meaning of the word. “

198. “ You made me feel loved and wanted and for that, I’ll always love you.”

199. “ She’s lost without you. “ ~ Shawn Mendes

200. “ Don’t you get it? I’m in love with you and it scares the hell out of me. “ ~ Tom Holland

201. “ I want to be alone. “

202. “ D-did i ever tell you how beautiful your eyes are? “

203. “ Step out that door and i swear we’re done. “

204. “ What right did you have keeping it from me? “

205. “ Running seems to be all you’re good at. “

206. “ What the fuck is it that’s so funny? “

207. “ She always burned so brightly. “

208. “ We aren’t even in the same book, let alone the same page. “

209. “ I don’t want to live in a world where I’m not with you. “

210. “ Your hair still looks so good. “

211. “ You say this is what you want but your eyes are telling me a different story.“

212. “ Murder was apart of the agenda for today. “

213. “ What if i just break his nose a lil’? “

214. “ Hurry up, before we regret it. "

215. “Didn’t you read the sign?"

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the-vinedresser · 6 years

Photo

Good days and bad days; concept: Cody. LOL jk these are photos taken from my family group chat. Cody got a haircut today and was traumatized by bigger dogs? Not sure, that’s what my mom told me. Although he does seem more on edge than usual.

1. Today was a bad day. It was raining all day. Usually it doesn’t bother me, but I do notice that anytime I’m working on a rainy day, my body shuts off. I almost turn lethargic, and I’m hardly exaggerating. The fatigue is insane to the point where my eyesight sometimes gets blurred. I drink all the coffee but I still end up not being able to function, no matter how much I have to do or how much sleep I’ve gotten. But this whole season (do I really even want to call it that anymore?) has basically been me on edge of a breakdown and trying to hold it in all day and not fall into the deep end when I’m out doing obligatory things like school, work, errands, etc. But the rain, along with working with my mom, something about it all just triggered depression again and I couldn’t do anything. I was paralyzed and just wanted to cry.

2. In a way, I thought it was almost cool how connected I am to nature, but for the most part it just sucks because society doesn’t glorify stuff like that. They just like people who don’t feel as much and get the job done. I know that someday I’ll also give in and reach that point but I’m trying to delay it as much as possible.

3. Last year was interesting in part because I found myself trying to resist adulthood responsibilities as much as possible. While my friend was graduating early and asking me about my interviews for internships and all this stuff, I was fighting to keep my childlike and laid back attitude but I felt like shrewdness and worry just kept getting pushed onto me and force fed to me. I don’t want to wear loafers and be on edge all the time and become jealous of young people who don’t have any idea what’s coming to them. I mean, that was me less than a year ago.

4. I shut down and sat at my desk just thinking about how enormous life is (again) and how people are so selfish and hypocritical and how I would love to have a zombie apocalypse come in. I told my friend that and I realized then that I would actually be in the most in my element of a zombie apocalypse occurred because of anxiety. I told her that I definitely don’t want to die, but I also would not mind having a terminal disease.

5. I was angry at my mom because I felt forced into doing this job because she kept begging me to and my dad said I should help out my mom. All good intentions and that’s what I went into it with. But I started growing bitter because I feel like she has selective hearing and never truly hears what I’m saying. Is this a universal mom/parent problem? Why do I feel like it is? I’ll say something like hey mom, I really want to see a psychiatrist to get medication because I’m really struggling. I thought it out and I’ve tried a lot of things, but this is the step I want to take. However, I’m really scared to make an appointment. Can you help me out? This went on for a really long time. I had to keep reminding her which is fine because she’s busy, but she didn’t seem to have any problem calling massage parlors to see if they have any appointments available multiple times. That made me pretty angry. Because it’s honestly enough to feel like I’m going crazy and I’m making all this shit up and doing this to myself, let alone not getting help on something I made really clear. At work I kept telling her I feel really nauseous and I’m losing feeling in my hands and feet. I think I’m going to throw up. But she kept teaching me how to do this complicated work thing and I have no idea what’s going on and I’m only working there for three more days so why would she even teach me this when there’s someone who already knows how to do it really well? Also, why does it take crying and throwing a shit fit to get people to actually hear you out? Like why does it have to get to that point? Can’t people just listen when you say something to them is it really that hard I don’t understand

6. So I went home early. This is great, nobody knows enough about mental illness and it’s also on me too because I don’t know how to communicate my needs either. I just know someone is going to need help in the future with some sort of mental cloudiness and struggles and I’m going to tell them it’s ok to seek help and I highly recommend it and they’re going to immediately retract in repulsion because all society ever told them was that therapy was for crazies. I hate this. I know because I did the exact same thing instead of listening to the 4 people who told me it’s ok to seek help.

7. I don’t know why I don’t think of myself and why I constantly stretch myself too much and let myself be taken advantage of, even by my own mother. I used to think of it as sacrifices you take to make a relationship grow and to make other people happy, but now it just seems like people expect me to act this way to them all the time. You like going to the mall and that’s how you relieve stress? Ok, I’ll go spend the day with you at the mall even though I get really tired but I try not to show it too much because you’re energetic and you’re having a fun time. Why am I always thinking about ways to make my mother happy and feel like it’s my duty to put her needs before mine? She always brings up her childhood and then I just feel bad for her.

8. The weird thing is I would never like or hang out with or look up to people like my parents, if I just objectively look at them as people and not my parents. My mom is the neurotic boss who won’t leave me alone, is entirely insensitive to the nuance of feeling in other people, and makes it clear to everyone that’s she’s sad when we don’t do things as she expected, like going to the mall. My dad is the boss that makes sexist and racist jokes and pretends he knows everything by making vague, cryptic statements in a loud voice. But I can’t bash them, they’re great parents and good people and they have me a good childhood that could’ve been significantly worse. I just wish I could look up to them more as mentors because it was easier that way, but our interests and the way we deal with problems can’t be more different.

9. I’m not sure why, but another thing that really annoys me is how everyone I know seems to use my education at NYU as a thing for them. Like, oh I know someone who goes to this top-ish college like honestly I feel like nobody should care, especially because I personally don’t, but everyone does for some reason. Like does that grant me the access to be prideful and feel like I’m better than you just because I went to a college? Every time we meet a group of people, nobody else ever says anything more than their name or talk about what college they go to but somehow someone else always has to mention it. Like my dad was like oh she’ll get the job for sure, I mean, she went to NYU. WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN. ARE WE REALLY ATTACHING VALUE JUST TO A NAME OF AN INSTITUTION. Like we’re all depressed and in debt I’m glad you like using the institution of college, a place that brutally preps people for nauseating adulthood and crushes people’s dreams, as a way to boost yourself up that’s great. Let’s encourage more people to hate their lives and work under insane amounts of pressure it’s great.

10. People are so stupid I can’t deal with the lack of knowing and disregard for other human life that is happening. Do you think videos about glitter on instagram are going to make your lives meaningful? THAT’S GREAT GOOD FOR YOU I am honestly so jealous, I’m not even kidding. People suck so much which was why being a Christian was so frustrating at times because they’re so exclusionary. They say, no gay marriage no this, no that but the Bible also says to be compassionate and giving, and they all of a sudden become so shy when it comes to outreach and showing grace to other people. I guess my perspective is just different because I don’t have those deep relationships where I can tell people anything on my mind and vent to, I’m too busy trying to just help other people who I barely know WHY DO I DO THIS

11. Life sucks and nowadays I’m drawn to topics about death, sex and drugs. Just stupid counterculture things because I feel like they hold more truth amongst whatever the fuck people are doing these days? My teenage angst seems to have delayed about 5 years it’s great. I mean, the later the better for this kind of stuff so in a way I’m thankful I guess. I just don’t believe in humanity or anyone anymore I hope we all die in some kind of natural disaster to be completely honest. Like I heard people all the time saying that politicians suck and the world is corrupt but it isn’t until now that I truly understand what they mean. Capitalism literally drives everything. This is why I would rather kill myself than go to most things that are business related. I refuse to be part of the problem just so I could live a quaint life, not unless I had my future children in mind or something more altruistic like that. Other than that, it’s terrible and takes advantage of the most vulnerable people. Our president is a narcissist. I want to just live on an island for a little while and do something like make surfboards or something this is bullshit

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