#I was pointing out that it was rude to edit people's artwork to say something you wanted it to | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

crushpdf · 3 years

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Tumblr Etiquette Masterpost

Hi! Because I have (1) anxiety (2) been on tumblr for more than a decade, I have assumed the incredibly narcissistic position of making a post about how to interact with people on tumblr, since I think I’ve mastered the basic rules.

UPDATE: I started drafting this post a while ago. I'm not calling anyone out. I mostly made this because I realized I had a shocking number of followers who are new to tumblr.

In this post I’m covering Asks + Anons, Reblogging + Liking, Following, Tags, and ~Making Friends~.

TL;DR: tumblr etiquette is about social norms. These are the norms I have observed in my time here. You’re free to blog as you choose, but tumblr is a happier place when everybody is following the same guidelines.

Yes I use the words like “have to” or “rule” in this post. No, none of these are actual rules. Do what you want, but be prepared to face disgruntled users.

Let’s get started!

All About Following

Rule #1: You do not have to follow anybody you don’t want to. You do not need to let someone follow you if you don’t want to.

Tumblr is technically a social media site. If you want to grow your social circle, follow your mutuals’ mutuals. The internet is like real life. You do a Group Hang, and then eventually you get to the one-on-one friendship. (Please refer back to Rule #1)

Some of your mutual-in-laws might feel slighted if you follow everyone except them. That’s okay. (Please refer back to Rule #1) You might feel slighted if you’re the one not being followed. That’s okay. (Please refer back to Rule #1)

Tumblr is technically a social media site, but it’s also a place to see the content you like, not just the people you like. You can be friendly with people you don’t follow, or who don’t follow you. Some users are amazing people who just post the wrong content. That’s okay.

If someone posts content you don’t like, unfollow them. If you don’t like someone’s personality, unfollow them. Don’t be an asshole, don’t hate-follow, and don’t stress yourself out.

Asks, Anons, Messages

I tried to organize my thoughts into paragraphs. I really did. But talking to people on tumblr is messy if you do it wrong, and I’m just going to bullet-point some etiquette guidelines.

Rule #1: You do not have to answer any messages you don’t want to.

Your 500 word message should not be the first time a user sees your name

.....Before you get Venting Privileges, a user should recognize you from the tags you leave on their posts, or the comments you leave on their fic, or the other shorter messages you’ve sent them, or from being mutual-in-laws, literally whatever. But it’s Not Cool to dump things on people who don’t even know you.

The anon button should be used in two scenarios only:

.....1, to send a positive message. Not neutral! Positive message, the kind of message you send with heart emojis.

.....2, if you don’t want to admit personal information about yourself. The Venting Privileges Rule still applies even if you’re on anon (ie: you can’t vent! Because they don’t recognize your username!) and “personal information” does not include unpopular opinions. I’m talking messages like “Saw your post about living in Houston, and I agree!”

.....(Okay, three scenarios: if someone specifically asks for anons for an ask game or something!)

If you don’t want it posted publicly, don’t send it over an ask. Send it as a DM. You can always kindly request that the recipient doesn’t publish it, but typical tumblr etiquette is that asks get published by default.

Personally, if I follow someone back I like to introduce myself! Many of these conversations end after the “hi” stage, and I never force friendship upon someone. But many of these conversations also work as ice breakers, and make it easier to send the second message, and the third. Don’t worry that you’re being rude if you don’t do this—it’s also totally normal to just keep blogging as usual!—but it’s helpful in making friends.

If you reblog an ask game from someone, it’s just common courtesy to send them an ask of your own.

Tags, Blacklists

Rule #1: You do not need to use any tags you don’t want to.

(Are you sensing a theme? But this one gets a...)

But, be prepared to face disgruntled followers over this.

Tags are useful in so many ways. They’re a great place to organize posts so you can find them more easily later on! They’re a great place to show off your personality! They’re a great (and quiet! More on this later) place to show appreciation for content creators.

They’re also so incredibly helpful for your followers to avoid content they don’t want to see. If you’re delving into a new fandom and are about to reblog twenty posts in a row, tag it. If you’re liveblogging a movie, tag it. If your post (especially your photo posts) contains any common phobias or unpleasant things (gore, spiders, etc) tag it. And if one of your followers asks you to tag certain content, even if you don’t really understand why? Tag it, or else expect to lose that follower.*

*This isn’t about your follower count, btw. This is about being a decent person.

On the other hand, use blacklists and filtering liberally! If a user does tag their content, you have no right to complain about their posting it. Just filter it.

Reblogs, Likes, Comments

Tumblr is a blogging site. It functions on reblogged posts. That’s just how it works. This is not one of those sites where you scroll for hours clicking the like button.

Here are what likes are for:

Showing support for someone’s personal posts

Showing appreciation for someone’s tags

Admiring content that doesn’t exactly align with your blog (different fandom, inappropriate, whatever.)

Saving a post to find later

Showing double the love!

Here is where likes are most disappointing:

The original fic, artwork, or edits of your fellow tumblr users, especially in your fandom

(If you’re someone who regularly reblogs things, I’m not talking to you. You’re allowed to simply “like” posts. I’m talking to those users in my notifications that, day after day, like 35 of my posts and reblog exactly 1 of them.

Just reblog shit.)

Also, remember how I said you can quietly show appreciation in the tags? Only comment directly on a post if you are sure you’re adding something worthy to the post. If you’re just saying “haha me too!” or “I remember this!” just leave it in the tags. (Reminder! You can do what you want! It’s your blog and I’m not the police! I’m just teaching you etiquette! And the polite thing to do is to leave personal commentary in the tags!)

Let’s recap:

Aaaaand: Making Friends

Start small. Introduce yourself after you have mutually followed each other.

Leave nice things in people’s tags. They notice.

Send ask game messages.

Show off more of your personality. This isn’t a one way street!

.....You can do this by, well, reblogging things. Also by tagging things. Also by just making original posts.

Do not go zero to one hundred. You wouldn’t sit next to someone in class and start talking about your trauma (even if you heard that they share your own!). So don’t do it online.

Like people’s vent posts, and their asks, and their tag games. Reply to them, too.

Honestly? Do more tag games! If someone says “anyone can do this and say I tagged you” take them up on the offer! Tag other people you want to get to know more.

Last but not least, you do not owe anyone anything on tumblr, and no one owes you anything. Ignore the rude message. Block the annoying tag. Follow the users you like even if they don’t follow you back. Do not tell people to post more of X. Do not tell them to post less of Y. Do not ask them why they don’t follow you.

It’s so much easier to press the unfollow button than to be a dick.

#i have zero idea how to tag so i will just say #masterpost

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alexhandersen-marcoilsoe-fandom · 3 years

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THE MASTERPIECE: CHAPTER 1/5

Modern!IVAR x Reader x Modern!HVITSERK

a/n: This MASTERPIECE was so much fun. It was such an honor to do this with you @deans-ch-ch-cherrypie, you are so talented! Every hour writing and editing was definitely worth it! Thank you!

Spotify playlist: here (only for those who like latin urban music)

Words: 1913

Warnings: strong language

Summary: Ivar and Hvitserk had always prided themselves in being the sons of Ragnar Lothbrok. They had a comfortable life full of everything they wanted: houses, cars, money, and the most beautiful women. And with all of that came the security of always having the upper hand. But what happens when a bewitching girl from Ragnar’s past arrives into their lives claiming his fortune?

~~·······~~

An appointment with a lawyer was pending. He refused to give any other information on the phone about the reasons, so she had to meet him in his office.

Y/N had a hunch it was going to be a waste of her time. So out of spite, she was the last one to arrive. Not that she was ever on time. Punctuality was never one of her strong suits, but she didn't care about what others thought. She was so over their meaningless gossip.

Y/N stepped into the room and all heads turned to look at her, yet nobody knew who she was and she didn’t recognize anyone either so she excused herself and went out again. She must have been given the wrong room number.

The lawyer got up from his desk and called her name. He intercepted her midway and accompanied her back inside.

She looked exasperated; she even refused to take her coat off or sit down. Instead, she gazed around the room and noticed two young men out of the four reunited whispering emphatically at each other.

The lawyer thanked everyone for their presence and began reading from a long document.

Ivar was staring at her, wondering who the fuck she was and what she was doing at the reading of his father’s last will and testament. He was so lost in his thoughts that he didn’t realize what the lawyer was saying.

"...and it is my last will that all of my houses, company shares, private artworks collection, and the entirety of my capital goes to Y/N Y/L/N.

To my sons, please, forgive me. I hope you will understand my decision and in time come to accept it. I love you all.

Signed,

Ragnar Lothbrok."

Her face froze in a gesture of confusion and old memories best left unstirred popped into her mind.

There was an oppressive stillness in the room. Everyone was twisting and turning in their seats but nobody dared to break the silence.

“That’s a mistake, right?” Y/N heard one of them say in a quiet voice after some time.

"Ma'am, could you come up to the front and sign the document, please? Ma’am?”

Yet Y/N could not move. She’d heard the lawyer’s words loud and clear but the gears in her head were still turning, in an effort to process their meaning. It couldn’t be true. Ragnar simply left after using her. Surely, he would never leave her in possession of all that he owned.

"No!" Hvitserk jumped up from the chair, shouting and banging his fist on the table.

The lawyer winced in fear. He knew of the infamous temper of all the sons of Ragnar.

"Who is she? What is she doing here?” Hvitserk turned to face Y/N. “Hey, you! How do you know my father?"

She stared blankly out of the window and didn’t answer.

He snarled his lip in disgust as his anger overtook him. “Hey, are you deaf, woman?! Who. Are. You?! Answer me!”

“Ma’am, please. The quicker you sign these documents, the quicker you can leave.” The lawyer urged her with his eyes as if he knew that a discussion like this could only end with one – or several – of them in jail.

She finally found it in her to separate her feet from their spot on the ground and move forward towards the big oak desk. As she walked in between a row of confused angry gazes, she couldn’t help but remember Ragnar’s smiling face.

These men gathered around looked as strong, proud, and reckless as he had been and it was at that moment that she understood who they were. They had to be his sons. They didn’t seem like the kind of people you would want to mess with.

And yet, she wasn’t exactly afraid of them. Fear was not what paralyzed her body; it was the realization that everything about her life was about to drastically change.

“Father... father would never do something like this,” Ivar stated in a harsh voice aimed at the lawyer. “Check that testament again!” Ivar was sure that if his mother, Aslaug, were alive, she would've threatened to take his license away and ruin his reputation if he didn’t find a way to revert Ragnar’s will.

In a split second, the room broke into protests, their contained displeasure bursting through at last.

Yet their angered voices only faded into the back of her ears as she came to understand that this could be her opportunity to get even. She slid the pen against the ivory-white sheet of paper and with a swish of her wrist she sealed all of their fates.

The brothers argued for long minutes with the lawyer but there was nothing he could do. It was beyond his power.

And as they complained, she slipped out of the room quietly.

Ivar noticed and tried to follow her in a haste, but she was already gone. He looked out the glass window of the lawyer’s office and saw her crossing the bustling street. If they didn’t hurry, they would lose her in the crowd forever.

"Come on, let's talk to her!" He urged the others.

Björn looked at his younger sibling and brooded his forehead. "No, let it be. Father wanted it this way, so we have to accept it.” He didn’t seem exactly happy about it but his tone still spoke of resignation.

Ubbe turned to Björn and nodded begrudgingly. "Yes, he’s right. It won't work, she already signed it. It’s a legitimate legal contract.”

"Hvitserk?! You know that's not fair!"

"You’re right, Ivar. She can’t get away with this! And you-” He pointed at Björn and Ubbe. “-if you don't want to fight, then we will. But don't expect us to give you back your part of the inheritance if we succeed.”

“It’s not like we need it, baby brother.” Björn shot back. “My business with Ubbe is thriving. If you want to keep living under our father’s shadow, that’s your problem.”

“As for us,” Ubbe continued his brother’s train of thought. “We’ll try to make our own path as father did once... and you two should do the same. Maybe this is for the best...”

Hvitserk and Ivar exchanged a glance, silently acknowledging that their brothers were crazy and that they were on their own on this one. They ran out of the office as fast as Ivar’s legs would allow them.

~~·······~~

“Hey! You! Hey, stop.” Y/N ignored Hvitserk’s yelling and picked up the pace but Hvitserk grabbed her arm very rudely.

"Touch me again and you’ll know just what I’m capable of, pretty boy.”

Her confidence intimidated him and he took a meek step back.

“Could we talk to you, maybe?” Ivar’s tone was much softer, and she seemed to be considering it.

“No.” She changed her mind in a split second and started walking hurriedly away from them again.

“We just want-“

“Wait!” Ivar was stopped by Hvitserk’s hand on his chest. “I have a better idea. Let’s go get the car.”

Ivar realized immediately that his brother was probably planning something insidious and he decided to give him a chance.

~~·······~~

They followed her to her home and parked at the end of the street, hoping that the massive tree in front of her house would camouflage them from her view.

“And what are we going to do now?” Ivar leaned his head on the headrest and looked beyond annoyed. They had been sitting in the car for at least two hours without making any progress.

“We’ll stay here until we find out who she is and what she wants. So, relax brother, and give it some time.”

“That doesn’t make any fucking sense and I’m hungry.” Ivar had run out of patience. “Let’s try to do this some other way.”

As they spoke, Y/N dimmed the lights inside of her house. The outline of her body was the only thing they could see. She went from one room to the next, until she sat down in one place – probably her living room – and stayed there for a while.

“She’s turning on the lights again. Look! She’s going out of the house. Duck!” They slipped down their seats and lowered their heads.

“I fucking hope you have a better plan than hiding in plain sight, Hvitserk.”

His brother frowned, his forehead creasing deeply and Ivar knew then that he had no actual plan. That was the face he made whenever he was trying to come up with something on the spot.

Ivar rolled his eyes and clenched his jaw.

“She must’ve left already... Let me go near the house. Maybe I can spot something through the windows that can help us figure out who she is.” Hvitserk muttered only half-convinced.

“Fine. But be careful! We don’t want her to find out we’re here.”

“Dude, of course.” He replied a little insulted.

Hvitserk walked up to her home with his back hunched over, trying his best to be invisible. He reached the walls of her house and slid flush to them until he reached the window. He peeped through it, trying to see what was inside.

Her home was small and humble but clean and neatly organized. She had an awful number of plants and herbs spread on various shelves as well as some lighters, smoking pipes, and what looked like a strange strain of weed, at least from that distance. So she wasn’t thatuptight after all, Hvitserk smirked cheekily.

There were dusty old books stacked on piles with weird unreadable symbols on their spine, and there were some regular documents on her kitchen table but he couldn’t make out the small letters.

Hvitserk narrowed his eyes, they probably contained a few answers. He took out his phone to snap a picture of the papers.

At that moment the front door opened and Y/N crossed her arms stiffly across her chest.

The flash of Hvitserk’s phone went off accidentally and blinded her momentarily which only made her look angrier.

“Well, wouldn’t you rather come in?” She challenged him in a sarcastic voice.

Hvitserk was pissed off and startled, but most of all, he was embarrassed, judging by the way his high cheeks flushed with blood.

“What? You thought you were being so stealthy? You guys aren’t exactly subtle...”

“We just, uh- we just want to get to know you better.” Hvitserk cleared his throat and gave her an improvised smile.

“Oh, is that so?” Y/N’s eyes twinkled for a second and her shoulders relaxed a little. “Well... If that’s the case, handsome... then you should ask me out.”

She sauntered forward to caress his chin with her index finger seductively. She flashed him a smile and Hvitserk, ever the ladies' man raised an eyebrow and smirked back, unable to help himself. All thoughts about his mission had left his head and were replaced with the signals his brain was giving him for him to notice the light caress of her fingers, her body inches away from his, and her tantalizing lips so close to his face.

“Or... you could just fuck off!” Y/N shoved him, sending him tumbling backward until his ass hit the grass, then she smacked the door on Hvitserk’s face with a smug smile. “Asshole.”

It’s this easy to fool a guy. She thought with amusement.

#ivar the boneless #ivar ragnarsson #vikings #hbovikings #hvitserk #hvitserk ragnarsson #ubbe #ubbe ragnarsson #björn ironside #björn ragnarsson #ivar the boneless x reader #hvitserk x reader

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mind-of-a-hardstan · 4 years

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Paint

Pairing: Taehyung x Reader

Genre: smut, make-up artist au

Rating: E

Warnings: smut, so much sexual tension omg, mature language, dirty talk, kissing, dry humping, grinding, taehyung’s neck should be a warning

Summary: You were a makeup artist. That much was clear to everyone. You were not the only makeup artist among the team who could draw, though. When they talked about drawing on Taehyung and giving him tattoos, you’d expected someone else to get the job. Why would they give it to you? You were one of the youngest on the team. One of the least experienced.

You did get the job though, to your surprise.

And, well. Who were you to turn down an offer?

Based on this post by @taechnological

Word Count: 5.3K

A/N: Should I have edited this? Yes. Did I? No. Also I wanted to use a gif where tae was already painted but then I saw this one and I went feral and I knew that was the one. Also I’m seriously debating whether or not I should start selling organs for feedback :)))

You were a makeup artist. That much was clear to everyone. You were not the only makeup artist among the team who could draw, though.

When they talked about drawing on Taehyung and giving him tattoos, you’d expected someone else to get the job. Why would they give it to you? You were one of the youngest on the team. One of the least experienced.

You did get the job though, to your surprise.

You were delighted at first. You liked painting people. One of your first jobs during college was painting kid’s faces at McDonald’s. You painted your cousins all the time, turning them into cute, bouncing little artworks. You had the skill and the talent for it.

So yeah, at first you smiled and accepted the job graciously. Then you realised… this would not quite be like painting kids. This would be a lot more like painting superman.

Or a Greek god perhaps.

You were a professional though. You’d done their makeup plenty of times. You were near all seven of them enough that they didn’t affect you as much as they did in the beginning. Sure, you’ve laughed with them when they joked around, tried to console them if they were nervous.

Doing their makeup took time, and that time was either spent in silence or with talking. That depended on how they felt at the moment.

They were never rude though. Just tired, sometimes.

You were a professional, and you’ve done all of their makeup at some point or another. Never on their necks though. Or… for god’s sake, their chests. And Taehyung… Taehyung was something else.

Taehyung’s personality shined like a star. He was bright, he made the whole room laugh if he wanted to. He made you struggle to keep your composure multiple times. Taehyung was someone who wore his heart on his sleeve. You’ve had to apply lipstick to multiple of his pouts. You always had to hide a smile at the cute gesture, and he always noticed and pouted harder.

Taehyung was, and this was the worst part of all, so unbelievably fucking hot to the point that it was almost downright intimidating. Sometimes you would walk into his dressing room and just need a second to stop and process. And he would doing something as simple as sitting and looking at you with a raised eyebrow.

Now, the other members were just as stunning. They had you just as flustered in the beginning. They just… they never looked at you in the way that Taehyung did. They never locked eyes with you when you leaned closer to their faces. They never winked at you, never smiled so brightly when they saw you, never stared at you so intensely. They never requested you when –

Oh.

Oh, that made sense. Taehyung had requested you do his makeup quite a few times before. Why would this be any different? There were older and more experienced artists on the team, so the only reason that you got the job would be because Taehyung requested you.

That made sense.

You weren’t sure if you had to be flattered or disappointed.

You went for flattered. It was better for you mental health.

When you entered Taehyung’s dressing room, he was already there.

You weren’t surprised. Taehyung was rarely late, and never without reason. You’d just… well you’re hoped there was reason. There had been a rush today and you felt like you’d needed a minute to mentally prepare for this.

He smiled at you though, that open, box shaped smile, and you smiled back.

“How are you doing today?” you asked by way of greeting and put down your make up case on the vanity. It was strangely quiet. None of the others were here yet. Taehyung came three hours early for the tattoos.

Taehyung bit his lip and looked down. “Nervous,” he said, voice low. You looked back at him and smiled softly, hoping that he would find comfort in it.

“Well, the paintbrush feels nice against your skin. At least according to my cousins. Maybe it’ll help?” you suggested, turning around with a small brush in one hand and black body paint in the other.

“Your cousins?” Taehyung asked with an unsure smile. You put down the paint and decided to do his foundation first, lest you ruin your masterpiece later.

“Yeah. My mom’s youngest brother is like sixteen years younger than she is? So his kids are still pretty small.” You gently primed his face with a cotton soaked in primer. “He has two girls and a boy. The boy is eight, I think? And the youngest girl is three.”

“And you painted them?” Taehyung mumbled, trying not to move too much. You stifled a giggle and nodded.

“When my uncle told Connor that I do makeup for a living, he kept asking me to paint his face too. His sisters joined in and now I paint them whenever they come over.” You started with his foundation, taking care to apply it where the paint will go too. “Rosa, the middle one, always says that it ‘tickles nicely.’ I think she enjoys the brush more than looking at herself in the mirror afterward.”

Taehyung had a big smile on his face that he tried to suppress for the sake of his makeup. He was looking at you fondly as you talked, and you had to suppress the urge of stopping just to stare into his eyes in infatuation. The closeness wasn’t helping.

He wasn’t looking fondly at you though, you had to remind yourself. Rather, he was fond of the story you were telling. He liked kids – that was no secret. The fond look was not directed at you. It was directed at your cousins.

You clenched your jaw and tried to focus on the task at hand. This was a job. This was your profession. There wasn’t supposed to be any feelings involved. Not infatuation, not fondness, not longing.

Job job job.

“What’s the other one’s name?” Taehyung asked when you turned away and looked for another beauty blender.

“Hmm?”

“Your youngest cousin, the three year old, what’s her name?”

“Oh, Ira. She’s a dear, far less spoiled than some of my other cousins were. She’s still a toddler though, so like, never leave her in a room with a white wall and crayons.” You leaned in close to blend the foundation near his ear. “I learned that the hard way.”

Taehyung laughed and his warm breath hit your cheek, making goose bumps rise on your neck. It didn’t mean anything, you told yourself after suppressing a shiver. It was just a normal bodily reaction.

You stood back and admired your handiwork. With the foundation done, you could do the tree patterns and then the rest of his face. Easy peasy lemon squeezy.

You dragged a stool closer and sat down. The stool was a bit higher than his chair, but you were shorter than him, so you had comfortable access to his neck.

Depending on how you saw it, that could either be a good or a bad thing.

See, the good thing was that this made it very easy to work. The angle was good and you it would be easy to paint the patterns. You would have to move your stool a bit to have better access to his chest later on, but that wouldn’t be a problem.

The bad thing, however, was that Taehyung had a very nice neck. You’d thought of sinking your teeth into his neck quite a few times in the past, and being this close to him – facing said neck – was not helping. Furthermore, you would have to lean into his neck, and Taehyung always smelled so fucking good.

But you were a professional. You’d think of biting his neck later.

Or… well. You’d think of biting his neck now, you’d just keep very quiet about it.

You opened the paint and picked up the brush and got to work. At the first touch of the brush against Taehyung’s skin, he shivered and you slipped, smearing paint where it shouldn’t be. You giggled and he let out a shaky laugh too.

“Sorry,” he whispered, “’s cold.”

“It’s okay,” you whispered back, not wanting to disturb the gentle stillness that lingered. You cleaned up the mess and picked the brush up again.

“Keep still,” you warned before gently starting again. He shivered once more, but it was more subtle this time and didn’t disrupt you. You slowly started to trace the patterns on his neck.

“Tickles,” he breathed, and you huffed out a short laugh.

The paint was good, better than the cheap stuff you usually used on your cousins. It was supposed to be waterproof too, which was a very good thing because then it wouldn’t smudge on his clothes and he also wouldn’t sweat it off whilst dancing.

Because he was going to sweat under all of those lights. But it was okay, the droplets are going to roll right over the paint and not smudge a thing. Just… just perfect caramel skin shining with sweat and non-smudged paint. That you applied. That you were applying right now. To his neck. Beautiful thick neck, covered in your paint and sweat dripping–

This train of thought was bringing you to a bad place.

You pulled away and turned around in your stool to wipe the paint off the brush. Not because you needed to, you just needed a second away from Taehyung’s neck. He smelled too good, looked too fucking edible.

Taehyung stuttered out a deep sigh, like he’d been holding his breath. You looked at him curiously and smiled.

“You can breathe, you know. It doesn’t make a difference with the painting. Breathe as deep as you like,” you said. Taehyung swallowed and nodded, but he didn’t look at you.

You leaned in close again, took a deep breath and got a lungful of Taehyung’s intoxicating smell. You stopped for a beat and then got back to work. You had a job to do, and only so much time to do it.

You dipped the brush in paint Taehyung shivered again when you started to work on him. You were able to pull the brush away before catastrophe happened. You looked at him, and he had a blush on his cheeks.

“Sorry,” he said.

“Don’t worry about it,” you smiled, “I should have warned you anyway.”

Silence followed after that. You worked on Taehyung’s neck diligently. You were proud of yourself for only being mildly distracted. Taehyung still wasn’t breathing properly, though. His breaths were coming out too shallow. You frowned.

“Are you okay?” you asked and pulled away. Taehyung swallowed and nodded. “Are you sure? Taehyung, if you’re uncomfortable we can stop. You know that right?”

“Yeah,” he said.

You eyed the patterns on his neck. They weren’t nearly done, but they looked good enough that you could stop here. They could edit in the rest if needed.

“Do you want me to stop?”

“No,” he said so fast he almost cut you off.

“Okay.”

Something was clearly wrong, but you didn’t pry. He mentioned that he was nervous before, so maybe it was those same nerves acting up. If he wanted to talk, he would.

“Ready?” you asked. Taehyung nodded and you touched the brush to his skin again. His breathing stuttered. You laid a free hand on his thigh without much thought, trying to give him a bit of comfort. Taehyung tensed and you removed it as quickly as you put it there.

“Sorry.”

“It’s – it’s okay.”

Another silence followed after that. You tried to focus, but the room felt charged somehow. You couldn’t put your finger on it, but the moment you’d put your hand on his leg, the vibe in the room changed.

You brushed it off as your own idiocy. Maybe you were just projecting. Maybe feeling that muscle tense under your hand messed with your head more than you realised.

Time passed in a blur. You worked on his neck with as much focus as you could muster. You made surprisingly few mistakes – which filled you with pride, because these were hardly the best circumstances for focus.

“Taehyung.”

“Yeah?”

“I need to work on your chest.”

“Okay.” He sounded breathless. Was he really breathless or were you just hearing what you wanted to hear?

“Can uh… can you take off your shirt? Maybe you can switch it for one with a wider collar?”

“I don’t have another shirt.”

“Oh. Uh. Do you want me to get another one?”

“No, I uh, I can take it off. It’s fine.”

“Okay.”

You turned around and fussed with your make up kit to give him a moment. The material shifted audibly and you saw the white t-shirt fly across the room from the corner of your eye. You cleaned off the brush fussed with it some more to avoid having to turn around and face this new challenge.

It wouldn’t be the first time you saw him shirtless. And it wasn’t like you were some schoolgirl who couldn’t control her hormones, for god’s sake.

You took a deep breath and gripped the brush before turning around. Taehyung was… well. Wide. Caramel skin and wide shoulders and a soft tummy and such a biteable fucking chest.

Well.

You refused to let your eyes travel beyond his neck though, refused to meet Taehyung’s eyes. You followed the lines you drew and tried to map out where you needed to go from here.

“I might have to sit in front of you for this part. Is that okay?” you asked, still staring at the black lines across his neck.

“Yeah, sure.”

This wasn’t fucking fair. It couldn’t be legal to talk with a voice that fucking deep, while shirtless and looking like a fucking Greek god. This wasn’t allowed to be fucking okay.

You moved the chair in front of Taehyung and sat down. Your knees brushed against his and you had to lean forward a lot to work on his – very fucking wide and perfect – chest.

You leaned your hand against his shoulder to steady yourself and tried not to feel your skin spark at the contact. “Is this okay?” you asked,

“Yeah.” Taehyung’s chest vibrated, vibrated, with the word. You swallowed and kept painting.

Your back complained loudly, and after a few minutes you sat up straight again with a frown. You arched your back in a stretch and winced at how loudly your spine cracked.

“This isn’t good for my back,” you said and Taehyung scoffed out a laugh. You locked eyes with him an smiled. “I feel like an old lady for saying that.”

Taehyung gave you big grin in return. “Maybe because you are?”

“I’m younger than you,” He laughed and shook his head. “No but really, this isn’t working. Could you maybe spread your legs for me?”

“Jesus,” Taehyung groaned.

“What?” you asked in alarm.

“You can’t – you can’t fucking say that!”

“What?” you asked again.

“You can’t do that! You can’t look like that and then tell me to take off my shirt and breathe into my neck and touch me and that fucking brush, god damn it, and then tell me to spread my legs for you.”

“I’m – what?”

“And then you told me to breathe normally. Breathe normally. How the fuck should I breathe when I feel like I’m boiling in my own skin, fuck.”

You stared at him with wide eyes when he finished his rant. He ran his hand through his hair in frustration and – well. Good to know. You finally let your eyes travel up and down his body. It was like he gave you permission, even when he didn’t do it literally.

His cheeks were slightly flushed, now that you looked. His chest too. He was slightly tense. His thighs looked so good in his sweatpants. And. Well.

Taehyung was unmistakably hard.

“Taehyung,” you said when you dragged your eyes back to his. His pupils were blown wide now, jaw tense. He saw you eating him with your eyes. He definitely saw and he looked at you like he was waiting.

“Yes?”

“Do you need help with that?” you said and looked down at his dick straining his pants.

“God, yes. Please. I’ll literally fucking beg.”

You looked at him slyly, not able to hold in a smile. “Wouldn’t have guessed you were into that.”

“I don’t usually do the begging but I’ll beg for you. Christ I’d do anything for you.”

His words caused need to pulse in your lower stomach. You liked the visual of him begging for you. You weren’t usually into that either but… well.

“That’s a dangerous thing to say,” you teased and pushed at his knees. Taehyung got the message and spread his legs. The visual was something fucking else. It was nothing new to see Taehyung sitting with his legs spread, but god. He was shirtless. And very fucking hard. And wearing grey sweatpants.

You moved your chair closer until it touched his, almost creating a bench of sorts and just… looked and looked and looked.

“Please,” Taehyung whimpered and your eyes snapped back to his. They were nearly black and very much pleading. “I feel like ripping my skin off.”

You breathed out a laugh and placed your hand on his left pec, the one that wasn’t covered in patterns. You ran your hand over his chest, then down his stomach and flicked a thumb over his hipbone. Taehyung’s breathing hitched and you smiled again before putting your hand on his clothed erection.

“Fuck,” Taehyung groaned out. You palmed him slowly and his hips bucked up into your hand. He threw his head back and bit his lip and god you were wet. Just… looking at him.

“You’re big, aren’t you?” you said lowly.

“Yeah,” he choked out.

Taehyung damn near mewled in protest when you took your hand off of him. You bit your lip and moved closer, shuffling onto his lap. Taehyung stared at you with hooded eyes as you made yourself comfortable on his lap.

You ground your hips down onto his and you both hissed at the friction. You threaded your fingers through his hair and steadied yourself with your other hand on his shoulder. Taehyung was breathing into your neck, groaning at the feeling of his dick getting attention. Every noise vibrated down your spine.

You leaned down and bit his neck thoughtlessly.

Taehyung cried out and his hips bucked up, causing you to moan into his neck. He felt big. He felt like if he fucked you, he would destroy your insides.

It almost scared you, if it weren’t for how hot you were.

“You don’t understand how long I’ve wanted to do that,” you groaned and bit his neck again, softer this time.

“Do what?” he asked. You licked over the forming mark, hoping to god that make up would be enough to cover it up.

“Bite you.”

“Fuck, really?”

“Yeah. You have such a thick fucking neck and I just–” you sucked another mark into his skin “–wanted to fucking mark it.”

“Christ,” he moaned into your neck.

You rocked your hips back and forth against his, creating the ideal friction for both of you. His dick rubbed against your clit perfectly. You threw your head back when he bucked up, not able to keep your moans to yourself.

“You sound so fucking good, do you know that?” Taehyung grit out and gripped your ass, guiding your movements to sync with his.

“You too, fuck.”

You leaned forward, needing to feel his skin on your lips. You’d fantasised about this so much, now that you finally had the chance you were not going to let it slip through your fingers. Taehyung tilted his head to give you better access to his neck, and you peppered kisses all the way from his shoulder to his ear to his jaw, stopping every now and then to suck a mark.

Taehyung’s fingers threaded through your own hair, using it as leverage to pull your head back roughly.

“You have no fucking idea,” he growled, “how bad I want you.”

“Yeah? How bad?” You still moved against him, the friction enough to push you to the edge of an orgasm, but not enough to push you over.

“So bad. So long. Was so fucking frustrated.”

“Why’s ‘at,” you asked teasingly and he groaned.

“Because you’re so goddamn hot, fuck, and – and you’d breathe into my – shit – neck and when you bent over me you smelled so good – hng. And I’d sit there trying – trying to crack jokes while I just wanted to fuck you ‘till you feel me for days.”

“Fuck, Taehyung,” you moaned and he gripped your hair harder.

“Say it again,” he whispered. His other hand was moving from your ass to your hip to your back to your breasts. He explored you slowly, almost curiously, trying to see which touch made you gasp.

“What?” you breathed, unable to think.

“My name. Say my name again.”

“Tae–” he bit your nipple through your shirt and pulled your hair at the same time, causing your whole body to jolt “–Taehyung!”

“God, I could come just from that, I swear.”

Hoseok’s laughter filtered through the walls and realisation struck that you were not alone in this building, and that you had a job to do. You’d get fired if they had to go on set and Taehyung wasn’t done. You’d get murdered if they found you like this.

You stopped grinding on Taehyung’s dick and he looked at you quizzically.

“What’s wrong,” he said, voice so silky and deep and fucked out.

“I – I have to finish you,” you said unsure.

“Uh, please?” Taehyung’s eyes were near pleading, but he seemed as confused as ever. You laughed and shook your head no.

“I mean I have to finish your neck. And clean up that mess.” You gestured to the red and purple marks blooming on the other side of his neck. You were very careful to stay away from the painted parts.

“Oh. Oh, yeah. Yeah that.” Taehyung shook his head like he was trying to clear it. You knew how he felt.

The paintbrush was somehow still in your hand. You grabbed the paint and took a deep breath before dipping the paintbrush and starting up where you left off. Taehyung’s hands never left your body, and you were still sat in his lap. It was just more comfortable to work whilst in his lap than to have to break your back bending over.

That seemed to be a good excuse.

“I have a question,” Taehyung whispered, still running his fingers lightly over your back and the top of your ass.

“Yeah,” you said, trying hard not to fuck up the patterns on his neck.

“You said you thought about biting me?”

“Yeah.”

Taehyung laughed at the mumbled response and pinched your but, making you squirm. “That all you thought about?”

You looked up at Taehyung and saw the lust still glittering in his eyes. His dick was still hard against your clit.

“No,” you said, leaning in so your lips nearly touched, “thought about riding you. When you sit with your legs spread I just wanna fucking mount you.” You firmly ground your ass on his dick once. “Thought about sucking your cock too. Debated doing it right then and there in front of everyone, I swear.”

You caught Taehyung’s lip with your teeth and pulled. Taehyung moaned and you swore you felt his dick twitch.

“Are you gonna?” he ground out. His voice was rough, you could tell it was more out of frustration than anything else.

“Depends on how good you are,” you teased.

“Jesus you can’t fucking say that.”

“I just did.” You giggled at the way he groaned and threw his head back. “Really though, I have to finish this if I don’t want to get fired.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“So are you gonna be good and let me finish?” you teased again.

You didn’t miss the way Taehyung swallowed. “Yeah.”

You giggled again and nipped at his jaw before going back to painting his chest. Silence followed, the pressure of time finally catching up to you. Taehyung was evidently still distracted though, judging by the tiny movements he made with his hips, still chasing the friction.

You didn’t let yourself indulge in him though. You finished your work as quickly and effectively as possible and focused hard on covering up the marks you left on the other side of his neck. You tried to plan ahead too, knowing the bruises would darken within an hour.

If someone saw them, all hell would break lose. Fucking him would already cause an uproar, but fucking him while you were on the clock could make you lose your job. And everything else for that matter.

“There,” you whispered, anxiety evident in your voice, “all done.”

You moved to get off of his lap but Taehyung pulled you back and kissed you.

You melted. You felt how your body turned to mush in Taehyung’s hands the moment he put his lips on yours. His lips were soft against yours, moving slowly. He kissed lazily, like he had all the time in the world and was willing to give it all to you.

Taehyung nipped at your bottom lip, asking for access. You opened for him on instinct and his tongue swooped into your mouth expertly.

It felt good. It felt so good. You tangled your hands in his hair to try to pull him closer. Taehyung seemed to share the sentiment, pushing you against him by your lower back and slowly, thoughtlessly, grinding his dick against you.

After what felt like hours of kissing, you had to pull away, the need to breathe finally making itself present. You gasped against Taehyung’s mouth, leaning your forehead against his.

“I was good, wasn’t I?” he breathed, base in his voice sending shivers down your spine.

“So good,” you gasped.

“Will you ride me now?”

“Do you have a condom?”

Taehyung cursed and shook his head and you felt your stomach drop in disappointment. No gut rearranging happening today, apparently.

“Just grinding then. I just wanna feel you. We can fuck another time just… just wanna feel you. Please.”

“Yeah. Yeah fuck.”

The next moments passed in a blur. You moved quickly to pull his sweatpants down his legs, only about halfway down his thighs. Taehyung was fumbling with the button of your jeans, fingers moving clumsily with impatience. You helped him pull your own pants and underwear down.

“Fuck,” he whispered when moved back to his lap. He kissed you again, this time with more impatience, more heat. It wasn’t lazy in the slightest. He sucked your tongue into his mouth and lightly bit down and you moaned. You lowered your hips onto his and he hissed when you made contact.

This was a whole different feeling. His cock was smooth against you. And big, fuck. You swallowed down the urge to throw caution in the wind and ride him for real.

“God, you’re so wet, why are you so wet?” he said in wonder.

“Because you’re so goddamn hot.”

“Fuck, Y/n.”

Taehyung gripped your hips and moved you against him at a faster pace, movieng his own hips against yours. The brush of his dick against your clit was driving you insane, it was nothing near feeling him through your jeans.

You ran your hands over his chest and he gasped when you ran finger over his nipple. You stared in wonder and did it again, this time his cock twitched against you, making you moan.

“You’re sensitive here?” you asked, licking at the bud and gasping when he gripped your ass.

“Yeah,” he choked out, “stop that or I’ll come.”

“That’s the idea,” you teased, breathless. You took his nipple between your teeth gently and Taehyung full on moaned.

He was having none of it though. He gripped you by the hair and pulled you up for another kiss. It was so messy now. None of the practiced skill of before, just a desperate need of contact and stimulation. You cursed him for ruining his make up once again, but let it slide for now. Easy to fix and worth it.

“Tae,” you gasped into his mouth when his thumb came into the mix. He was toying with your clit while his cock was still deliciously sliding against you. “Taehyung.”

“Yeah?” he asked, sounding so fucked out, voice so rough. He was everywhere. You felt him everywhere. Every point of contact burned your skin in the best way.

“Good, so good. You’re so good. Fuck,” you moaned against his lips. You took his bottom lip between his teeth and pulled, pulling another small – fucking incredible – sound out of him.

Your hips were moving desperately now. Neither of you had a rhythm anymore, just chasing pleasure.

“Don’t stop don’t stop,” you babbled, orgasm crawling closer and closer and you were right there so close so close. “Tae – Tae, fuck, Taehyung,”

You came with a cry of Taehyung’s name, body pulling taut and hands gripping Taehyung’s hair mercilessly. Your hips were twitching against him, but he used your ass as leverage to keep grinding against you.

“God, Y/n sound so good. So good, fuck, fuck, fuck,”

Taehyung’s cock twitched against you before spilling come over his stomach. His head was thrown back, mouth open in a silent cry.

It took a few moments for your soul to return to your body. You took deep breaths, trying to calm your racing heartbeat.

No easy feat with Taehyung looking at you with hooded eyes.

“That was so good,” he rasped. You giggled breathlessly and nodded.

“Imagine how good it would feel,” you said, leaning closer, “when you actually get to be inside of me.”

Taehyung groaned and closed his eyes, shaking his head. “Don’t say shit like that, I’ll get hard again, I swear.”

“Is your recovery period that quick?”

“Around you, apparently.”

You laughed and got off of him, looking for wet wipes or a towel of sorts. You frowned when you noticed a few drops of come on your shirt.

“You got come on my shirt,” you said and threw a towel at Taehyung.

“Sorry. I wasn’t exactly focusing on aim.” You set him a glare, but you had to bite your lip to force back a smile.

“You owe me a shirt now. And panties, holy hell.” Taehyung smiled brightly.

“I’ll buy you all the panties in the world if it means I get to ruin them.” And that smile was too innocent to be pared with the dirty words. You shook your head.

After quickly cleaning yourself up and putting your pants on, you fixed Taehyung’s make up. The damage wasn’t that bad and it only took two minutes.

“You might want to hurry. You need to be out in half an hour.” You gestured to the clock and Taehyung cursed, moving to get dressed quickly while you packed up your make up kit. You couldn’t help but smile.

“See you, I gotta get back,” you said, getting ready to leave.

“Wait, get back here,” Taehyung said and pulled your back flush against his chest, wrapping his arm around your waist. “Next time I’m gonna bend you over that couch, yeah? Gonna make sure you feel me for days.”

Your mouth went dry but you nodded. “Yeah,” you whispered, “but only if you be good and come prepared.”

Taehyung groaned and you grinned on your way out.

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infinitelytheheartexpands · 2 years

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Mathis der Maler (Theater an der Wien, 2012): Reactions, Part I

idk anything about this opera except there is a painter dude apparently let’s see what we’ve got and how much we can get through tonight @monotonous-minutia

idk what your problem is but this music is pretty at least

all in a day’s work (and seriously the music is gorg)

there’s always a gal...

y’all I’m reading the Wikipedia synopsis and trying to figure this plot out somewhat but literally I can’t lol this is gonna be something

welcome to the workshop also thank fuck someone is singing and might make this a little clearer

we love some good church hymns

what happened to you

oh honey

but what if you can’t

she’s so adorable

and also needs hugs

RUDE

what about, and this is just a thought, art can help make the world better?

DISCOURSE IS HAPPENING

definitely not relevant in 2022 what are you talking about

we love to see ordinary people demanding rights

“dude I am trying to do my artwork would you mind”

this duet is just FULL of Valid Points on both ends

welp

he’s trying his best

no one cares about your problems

uhhhhhhhhhh whatcha doin’ there

clever set change

ah, yet another entry in the index of operas with 16th/17th-century settings and Inter-Religious Discord

ya sure about that?

this guy is just counting the fighting choristers lol

mixed reception

what is that

edit: apparently it is a corpse/relic ig

the Protestants are calling BS

why hello again

would all politicians think like this

oh you two

DEFINITELY NOT STILL RELEVANT

thank you for saying no to burning books

I have a brilliant idea: how about you shut up

NOOOOOOOOOOOO I WAS ROOTING FOR YOU

new project!

but...

even more startlingly relevant discourse

now time for an economics class

not this bastard again

good point

the Cardinal: “oh...oh, fuck this is bad”

art as advocacy in action!

unless we don’t

YOU TELL ‘EM OFF

this is a cool ensemble

nice work

are you two okay???

anyway this is REALLY good so far but I’m gonna stop here for tonight because this is significantly longer of a work than I thought and also I’m tired

but at least I think I understand it somewhat now.

#opera #opera tag #Mathis der Maler #Matthias the Painter #opera liveblog #Hindemith #Paul Hindemith #arts and activism #STRIKINGLY relevant ideas here #to be continued another time

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dam-mango-cheese · 3 years

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ok hi I just wanted to come on here to say that this fandom really needs to get our shit together. it's not just about the toxicity and stuff, it's the rude and toxic things we've normalized to the point that we don't even notice when someone does it. so here goes a list of stuff we need to stop doing also I'm pissed rn sorry if I come off as rude. this is also not directed at anyone in particular so please don't take offense.

uh giving credit????? "giving credit who??" you may ask. well. let's start with artists. if you repost someone's art, pLEASE for the love of god give credit. it's not that hard. if you find art on google, pinterest, etc. and don't know who to credit, then don't post it??? it really is that easy. or you could do a reverse image search, if you don't know how to do that on your device, google it. if you don't know what google is?? go back to that rock you were living under before thanks.

moving onto the second part of the giving credit point. CHECK THEIR PROFILE BEFORE POSTING. many artists don't allow reposts. or sometimes they want you to ask for permission first. some artists also allow "normal" reposts but not for example in video edits. so please do check their bio and/or any highlights titled "important!" or something similar.

next we have the way of crediting. please do tag the artist in the actual post. so many people tend to just mention them in the caption. some even do it with the @/username instead of directly tagging them. I know for a fact most people prefer to be tagged in the actual post so please do. it's literally not that hard I don't see the problem?????

now pls remember to credit people who make textposts or memes too. an artist might spend more time on an artwork then your average meme maker spends on a post, but it's still important to credit them. even if we don't spend AS much time on our posts, doesn't mean we don't spend time on them. we take time out of our personal life to make posts for your enjoyment and if you think my post is good enough to repost you should certainly have the decency to at least give me credit tyvm.

now if you found the post on tumblr, twitter, etc. and don't know who to credit??? don't post it. or at least search their @ on instagram to see if they have the same/similar instagram username. you can also dm them on tumblr/twt/whatever and ask them if it's ok that you repost their stuff on instagram and if they have an instagram @ they would want you to use. if you don't do any of these at least write their username from another platform in the caption and mention to those who see the post on which platforms they can find whoever made the posts. that was a little messy but i hope it made sense.

i also wanna point out that the tagging point stands for memes, textposts, etc. too. it's really annoying when people can't bother to tag someone in the actual post. it's literally easier than tagging them in the caption what's the fkn problem?????

kinda like the last point but please tag both artists and other credits. like I'll see people who tag the artist on the first slide and then only tag textpist credits in the caption or just not credit memes and stuff at all???? like why?? if you know how to give credit to artists why is it so hard to do the same for other content?

finally moving on to something else. let's address the opinion stuff. this one's gna be short because my brain is empty rn. just let people have their own opinions. there's no need for you to go and state yours under someone else's post. usually all it does is to stir up drama, and believe me, no one wants that. this is especially to the people who can't state their opinion respectfully. if your opinion involves dragging someone else down or making them feel bad for what they think?? don't say it. don't. it doesn't make anyone feel better about anything and it's just rude and disrespectful. stop. thank you.

to the hardcore, toxic percabeth shippers: no <3. it's not cool of you to be 🤪the most hardcore percabeth shipper ever™️🤪. it's not a competition. it's just annoying. someone makes a perachel post??? big deal, none of your business. why does it matter that they ship perachel and you don't?? it's literally not a big deal let them have their opinion pls. someone says they ship pipabeth???? "NO PERCABETH IS THE ELITE SHIP FOREVER!!!!!!!!!!" 🤌throw your device across the room to release your anger🤌

now I've had this in my drafts for a while and one time I accidentally posted it, someone saw it before I had time to delete it and dm'd me to ask if all of this also applies when you reblog/retweet. obviously if you screenshotted someone's post or art all of the points above still stand. but if you just reblog or retweet, the original posters username will automatically showed and accessible so it's totally fine!

#yes i realize this is 90% about giving credit bc i literally could not come up with anything else #pjo #pjo fandom #percy jackson fandom #riordanverse #rick riordan #percy jackson #pjato

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noobsomeexagerjunk · 4 years

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thoughts on starry after multiple listens

(dated July 8, 2020 because i might make another one)

Edit: I SHOULD FACT CHECK MORE

the Starry soundtrack is as impressionist as the painters it invokes by energy alone, which is impressive given the style of music used (of which i’m fine with, but not partial to)

the Prologue does this right off the bat

the people of Monmartre are very critical of the rest of France and I adore it

i can feel theo’s overwhelment in Impress Me

Impress Me does a wonderful job at introducing the setting of the show

that song is a ball of pulsating yearning—no wait that’s the whole show

Theo got so stressed he walked blindly into Madame Segatori’s cafe

learning that the Le Tambourin was named as such due to its tambourine aesthetic via Vincent’s portrait of Segatori is just incredible to me; the table is shaped like a tambourine

“If Paris is the world, Monmartre is Bethlehem; and art is our Amen” sounds so powerful

A New Horizon is so warm

i expect Theo and Vincent to be very cuddly with each other everytime they interact

“dream with me, dear brother” is the energy of this song

french wheat fields will forever haunt me because of this damn musical

*insert Do You Like the Color of the Sky? post here*

like, so much emphasis to the sky

Vincent’s dreaming leaking into Theo’s trading practice surely must be a sight to see

chain imagery hits hard after hearing Wheat Fields/Finale Ultimo

in this yellow house, we dream of freedom

“should I really take this giant risk?” “brother, I took a giant risk coming here—fuck yeah do it!”

United in Distaste reeks of Vincent’s intimidation—it has new kid in school energy and I am living for it

Vincent coming to Monmartre (and when he arrives in Arles) like “Hey, I’m new in town, and it gets worse,”

Bernard has apparently spent enough time with Theo to be able to identify Vincent by frowning alone

Rude of Gauguin to yoink Vincent’s painting like that; Segatori immediately hangs it tho—

Gauguin sounds like he’s going to corrupt anyone who approaches him—dude announces his horny nature during his introduction

Gauguin IS a savage and a whore and the best thing about that is that he knows it; even better knowing the vision of his costume

Segatori’s displeasure throughout the song implies that the artists that frequent her cafe also argue amongst themselves frequently

“keep in mind that we’re academic rejects, Vincent”

with the way Degas, Pissarro, and Morisot tease at Gauguin (noting that Gauguin, Bernard, and Toulouse-Lautrec are together in a later song), it sounds like they’re are hurling insults from a separate tambourine table

Toulouse-Lautrec sounds dramatic; Bernard sounds like he’s not sure where he is artistically—both are a mood

Of the post-impressionist table, the only one retaliating with genuine insults is Toulouse-Lautrec; Bernard and Gauguin only end up defending themselves while Toulouse was ready to tear down Degas and Morisot

Pissarro IS old (at this period in time in the musical) damn

Morisot is unyielding with her insults, “speaking of size—“ holy shit oh no

i reiterate—why is Toulouse-Lautrec the only one actually speaking in a French accent; almost everyone there is French

since I’m aggressively referring to him, I think Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec merits a musical of his own, and that’s based on what first learned about him when I first listened to Starry

by extension, also Berthe Morisot

Monmartre’s artists be like “We’re very critical of ourselves and each other, and while that’s worth being intimidated by, don’t be intimidated by us! What do you have to bring to the table, foreign painter?”

Something poetic about how what Vincent wants being what all the artists want hereby making him a member of their squad is so warm to me—galleries are gravity INDEED

“We will embrace the madness we design, or lose our mind,” IS THIS FORSHADOWING BECAUSE IT FUCKING SOUNDS LIKE IT

“i am loving this! YES, GET ANGRY!” if only i can identify who said this

Something After All is directed towards Vincent, right? It better be, I lack context

Theo’s yearning is so relatable and I fear not being able to fulfill it

bless Kelly and Matt for giving Jo so much depth in Enlightenment

apparently she deadass learned English for the purpose of translating the letters she had compiled??? yo i love that

poetic how Jo invokes making a legacy since she’s the one who actually preserves her brother-in-law’s legacy (and by extension, herself and her husband’s legacies)

at first listen, i immediately drew a comparison to Hamilton’s Eliza; Jo is better both musically and literally, given that Vincent van Gogh is far more relevant than Alexander Hamilton will ever be, even with LMM’s musical

not trying to start beef, just an observation

Jo’s yearning is also such a mood

fire, light, and road imagery being invoked huh

it is by this point i’ve to the realization that the reasons one goes to Monmartre that was cited in Impress Me tie in very well to the individual characters’ desires in this show

Where Are We Going? goes so hard ugh yes

“I need a stronger strategy to seize my immortality!” Gauguin’s incredible ambition is the root of his dissatisfaction; doesn’t help that he’s impulsive both in the musical and IRL

Toulouse prioritizes integrity and Bernard prioritizes progression—I wonder what this means for their characters in the show

Toulouse and Bernard calling Gauguin out on his known shitty behaviors feels like they’ll be problems Vincent will have to deal with in Act 2, when they live together

this is where Gauguin leaves for Martinique, right???

which one is the act 1 closer, really??? The Sower or The Road??? help me please

everyone in town is really concerned for Vincent

it wams me how much Segatori believes in him

Bernard’s right, Vincent van Gogh’s artstyle IS a melting pot

learning that Toulouse-Lautrec capitalized on his art during the peak of his career really adds weight to his concerns on Vincent’s inability to sell

i like to imagine the everyone’s in the gallery during The Sower

Theo and Jo’s relationship progressing as Vincent’s works don’t sell hits upon realization

Theo falling hard when he learns that he and Jo yearn for the same thing tho

recontextualizing the imagery that Vincent found beauty in into imagery that demonstrates his person is just mighty good of Kelly and Matt

then again, so much of his person is in the artwork to begin with

“and everyone knows your reap what you sow.” w o a h!!!

The Road starts like a dramatization of one of Vincent’s breakdowns and how he copes with them, or perhaps this starts after one??? The opening verses suggest a lot

also ties his road to his dream of freedom with what i believe is his travel to Arles

“North, South, East, West—navigate from inside you,” = “With conscience as my compass,”

“i am guided towards the night” this Vincent knows the answer but is so clearly far from its reach and is desperately trying to figure out how to

soul of fire, crystal heart and blizzard-like brain; the man is passionate and everyone knows it

“Fascinating, but maybe just a little too soon,” sounds like that at this point, Toulouse-Lautrec and Bernard genuinely recognize and admire Vincent’s talents, but also understand that the world is still against him and that they have the experience to prove it

the “sunlight and storms” imagery always concern Theo, Jo, and Vincent’s relationship with each other

Gauguin popping up in this song with the compass imagery implies the show’s going to make him a pretty interesting foil to Vincent; this sounds like him traveling back to Paris, or at least him attempting to vibe in Martinique

this hurts when you remember what happens to Vincent

“curse of the gifted” is a phrase i am too afraid to understand

DYLAN SAUNDERS CAN SLAY ME WITH HIS VOICE

The Yellow House sounds yellow somehow

who clears their throat before writing a letter???

Gauguin’s frustration’s against Vincent’s admiration of him is amusing

sounds like Gauguin hasn’t found his “freedom” yet

Theo is one generous fellow

this arrangement lasts for only 2 months; given the apparent span of this musical, The Yellow House is a very “calm before the storm” song

wait a minute—

apparently, Vincent REALLY admired Gauguin and was so excited for his arrival at the yellow house

i fear the dramatization of their disagreements

“Don’t tell Theo I said that,” it amuses me how the van Gogh brothers’ relationship is so well-known to these painters

based on the gifs lurking, the ear incident WILL be dramatized and I am terrified for my heart on how it will be depicted

Sunlight and Storms quotes the original letter from Jo to Vincent surprisingly well (i attempted to read some—there’s so many! this was one of the first ones i came across)

this song hurts when it hits how little time Jo and Theo had together as a married couple

I am convinced a lot happened between Sunlight and Storms and On the Threshold of Eternity

this definitely was after a breakdown

i skip this song just so i don’t think about the obvious implications, i must confess

the meaning of “sunlight and storms” hits the hardest here

“we will not let your illness keep you from finding your freedom”

The Red Vinyard is so full of a brother’s love

this hits me, and i speak as an only child

“You’ve carried me more than you’ll ever know,” AH—

when Theo finally sees the new horizon, Vincent is seeing it too

and what Vincent saw he put on a fucking canvas

“i can see it—a new horizon” = “the sight of the starry night”

they say that at the time, not much was thought of the iconic painting

i could only wonder what might’ve happened between The Starry Night and Wheat Fields

all the piano motifs coming together in Wheat Fields/Finale Ultimo, just like that

“I’m ready for harvest time” is melodically similar to “The road is bright”, particularly when it’s just Vincent singing the line alone

despite the obvious, I don’t think I’ll grasp the meaning of the final song; i also skip this one so i don’t think about it

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darlingrutherford · 4 years

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Darling Rutherford's 1,000 Followers Post!

I've officially hit 1,000 followers! Honestly, I'm amazed. I started this blog about two years ago, I think? Solely because I had been playing DAI for a bit and wanted a place to reblog all my favorite DA things. I never imagined that it would grow to gain so many followers, that I would gain such amazing and supportive friends, and that so many people would actually enjoy my writing. Big thanks to my husband for pushing me to post the first chapter of To Weather the Storm on Ao3 back then. That's what caused my writing to spiral into what it is today, and why I post so often. So, thanks, honey! ❤️

I've never done a follower drawing before, but 1,000 is kind of a big milestone for me, so I figured I may as well give it a shot!

What is it? What will I get?

Two people's blog names will be pulled at random on February 20th, 2020 for a custom one-shot written ficlet by me.

1st name pulled will get a minimum of 3,000 words.

2nd name pulled will get a minimum of 1,500 words.

Either may actually get more than the minimum, it depends on how the writing bug bites me for what is chosen.

For those of you unfamiliar with my work, you can find a handful of it at Darlingrutherford on Ao3, although a lot of little drabbles are also in this blog under the "my work" tag, or "fanfiction", or... Other things. I'm terrible at consistent tagging, my condolences.

Da Rules - make sure to read before entering!!

You must be 18+ to enter this. Sorry. This blog is 18+ only as stated in my about due to some of my writing/reblog content and I don't want to draw a bunch of minors to my blog for this. Please feel free to come back when you're 18! This won't be the last one I do :)

You must be following me. New followers are welcome, but please don't follow just for the giveaway and then leave once it's over. That will make me sad :(

You must both like and reblog this post. Likes count as one entry, of course, since you can't really like something twice on this site. Multiple reblogs are fine, but please don't spam your followers (or me). Space out your reblogs.

If you want to reblog this to your specific fandom account and it's a side blog (e.g., this is my DA fandom side blog and my "likes" show up on notifications as @basiltwist), that's fine. Please just add a note in the post area of the reblog what your main blog @ is so I can match it up with a confirmed like in the notes. If I can't easily locate your "like" then you won't be able to win.

No specific "giveaway" blogs. Those reblogs won't count.

Winners will be notified on February 21st. You must respond to me within 48 hours of me messaging you on Tumblr. If the first place winner doesn't respond within 48 hours, the person in second place will automatically move to first and a new second place will be drawn.

Because this is a fic and I pride myself on writing a characters voice well, you must be willing to work with me on this. I will want to know so much about your OC if you want me to write them. I will want to send you quotes I'm writing to make sure it sounds as you had envisioned them. I will only be able to write as well and as quick as well as you are willing to correspond with me.

It may take me a few days to a week to write your ficlet, possibly longer if you aren't quick to respond to my inquiries. Be patient with me. I am a chronically ill person and have off days where I sleep a lot. I am treating these like a job. You will get your fic in a timely manner.

When fics are done they'll be posted to Ao3 as well as this Tumblr for you. You may save them to love as your own, but you may not repost these anywhere without obtaining my permission first. These are my writing, these are free, and one cannot put a signature on digital writing like you can artwork. You will of course be credited for your character if an OC is used, as well as the ideas and such.

I will NOT write: inc*st, p*dophilia, non-con, racism, anything NSFW about minors, writing gay characters as straight, things like that. I reserve the right to say no if your subject matter makes me uncomfortable. Don't hesitate to ask, though. I'm kinkier than you may know, there's not a lot that I'd be uncomfortable writing.

Ok with the rules? Here's what you can request when you win!:

One-shot ficlets will be (almost) whatever you want. You may request a fluff fic, NSFW, coffee shop discussion between your faves, etc. It can be your OC, canon characters, one of my OCs if you really love them that much and there's a scene you really want of them, etc. It doesn't even have to be a romance bit if you don't want it to be! Whatever you want.

A lot of my followers know I mainly write Cullen and Alistair based things, but that doesn't mean I'm not willing to do the research to write your favorite character of choice. Of course I'm most comfortable writing them, but I'm willing to make it work. Again, I reserve the right to say no if I don't think it's gonna work out on my end.

This is a DA/Witcher blog so your choice of fic should probably be in those fandoms (note for Witcher fics - I've only watched the Netflix show five times. Working on making my way through the games but, honestly, if you have a character you really want written, I'll find the videos and learn them for you cause you're a winner!) Feel free to ask if your fandom of choice isn't one of those twk. Who knows, I may be willing to do the research to write what you want. But I'm allowed to say no if I don't think it's gonna turn out well because I don't know the source.

I may edit or change these rules all together at any point in time if I deem necessary. They'll probably stay the same, tbh. Typos maybe. Idk.

I reserve the right to say no to your fic or stop writing it all together at any point if I deem necessary. Let's be honest, this will probably only happen if you're being super rude to me or angry that I won't write something I already listed in the no-no section. Just don't be a dick and this won't happen.

Questions can be directed to my inbox, or message me if you don't want your ask answered publicly. Good luck! ❤️❤️

#dragon age #fanfiction #cullen rutherford #Alistair theirin #1000 followers #idk what else to tag this lmao #my writing

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myulalie · 4 years

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On modern comment culture

First off, I’d like to make the distinction between honesty, and being hurtful under the pretense of being honest.

Hate, be it anon or not, is hurting someone’s feelings on purpose.

You can receive hate and be a hater too. It might be easier, even, to go from the hate you receive on your work, and take it out onto someone else’s.

Here is how I picture a hater's mind: “easy to pour some hate into a comment section, you don't see the person and they receive nice comments. They probably won't even notice.”

Sometimes, constructive criticism, even with your best interests at heart, hurts.

We don’t expect it, it’s not what we meant to write, or we just didn’t worry about how our work could be perceived.

It might be a very European vs American perception of criticism, and I aspire to get better, so the choice I made is to receive constructive criticism (concrit for short).

I wish someone would tell me if I’m writing something that doesn’t work, and why it doesn’t. I wish someone would point it out if I misuse a word.

Positive feedback is great and encouraging, actual comments about what someone likes/dislikes and why is helpful.

Not wanting any concrit is the author’s choice and I respect it. This is the reason I only offer concrit to anyone who told me they’re interested.

I wish concrit was still a thing

Modern comment culture is protective of authors, and there is a general agreement that concrit, especially unsolicited, is unnecessary.

I fully support the fact that fanfic authors are writing for free, so they deserve basic respect for their work.

This doesn’t give them the right to be assholes.

You put your work out there, you have a responsibility to at the very least let people know you’re not interested in concrit, and to disable/moderate comments if you don’t want them.

If someone comes to bug you when you explicitly mentioned you’re not interested in concrit then yeah, by all means, tell them to fuck off.

I think it’s important to let haters know their behavior is unacceptable. As they say, the only way to deal with a bully is to punch them in the face (or make them face the consequences of their actions as a general rule).

The author’s reply to hate tells a lot about them, but their reply to concrit also does.

Being polite should be a given.

And it goes both ways!

Readers are offering concrit for free too, they take the time to do so because they genuinely want to help. They enjoy your story enough to want to interact with you.

I’ve had a lot more comments than usual with kinktober, and I’ve built up a new habit of replying the next day before or after posting my daily take on the prompts.

I am aware that the amount of comments I receive is manageable, and some people have to deal with a lot more every day (like, hundreds).

In my experience, replying to short and sweet comments can be challenging because a simple thank you message isn’t personal enough, and you as a writer don’t have much content to actually reply to either.

Longer comments often open up more possibilities to reply, even if it’s just to let the reader know how you felt when reading their comment.

I believe that no matter how shy or busy you are, copying and pasting a little thank you message isn’t that difficult, and doesn’t take that long. You could even leave a note in each new chapter to let your readers know you read their comments and appreciate them.

Acknowledging readers will encourage them to comment your fics more, and potentially to the benefit of other authors too.

Don’t start fights because of concrit

Readers, please know that a simple heart as additional kudos goes a long way. Saying what you liked or just that you're enjoying the story is really encouraging too!

If you’d like to leave concrit, maybe formulate your comment as a question instead of pointing something out, to avoid upsetting the author.

I’m sure you mean well when you leave a comment, and you don’t want to discourage the author if you like what they’re writing!

If the author is open to concrit, they’ll probably reply to your question and ask their own, which leads to a conversation. Better safe than sorry, offer concrit and wait for them to agree, there is no use in getting into a fight with the author.

A better use of your time as a reader would be to read even more, I’m not getting in the way of your fun, or go and offer comments & concrit to someone who is interested in what you have to say.

As a writer, I guess you can always write more, and maybe thank readers for their kind words!

How to establish dialogue with your readers

Disclaimer: I’m still learning, and the amount of comments I receive compared to my free time is manageable. Before you proceed, please note I asked my reader for permission to use their comments as examples.

Myulalie: I would like to make a tumblr post about comments and include yours as an example.

It's to explain why I value them and how I proceed to reply, because I have strong feelings about author/reader relationships ^^

Would you be okay with that? It's totally fine if you're not, I am asking for permission because I don't want to make you uncomfortable.

Also, if you agree and for some reason change your mind once you've read the tumblr post, I'll remove it, no questions asked ^^

Reader: I don’t mind at all, I know a lot of people don’t leave feedback, for a variety of reasons, so any education in how/why is always important. I’m just glad my comments fall in to the good category 😁

Thanks for asking, you have my permission to use any you like.

The context is as follows: The characters went on vacation and asked friends to pet-sit their cats. I then used the characters’ cats as plot devices for the characters to move in together. A cat hid under the sink and refused to leave, which brought forth the “moving in” conversation.

Reader: Alcohol + other person = trautamised cat and an empty drinks cabinet... which I would be making them restock, oh and embarrassed friends... the cat might want to stay but I know the signs of a traumatised let.. sometimes taking a chance on something turns out to be the best thing in your life, so far, until the proposal

This reader is lovely and has been commenting on every chapter of this story, as well as some other stories. We never had any issue whatsoever and even chatted about their cat.

This is what I consider a good relationship, and when I read this comment I was surprised. I did not expect them to interpret the story this way.

The fact is, this reader is “wrong” because it’s not what I meant when I wrote (nothing happened to the cat, the alcohol part of the chapter is not related to the cat’s behavior).

This reader is also right because this IS what I wrote. The cat is hiding for plot purposes, but the plot also includes the pet-sitters getting drunk. I implied them making out, then regretting it later, thus behaving weirdly around each other, which was meant as comic relief.

I have seen replies to similar comments and needless to say people get into fights over such misunderstandings.

Here is my reply:

Myulalie: I would like to make the official statement that nothing bad happened to the cats D:

Ragnor & Jace's shenaningans were meant to hint at drunk making out and nothing more. The worse thing Church had to go through is second hand embarrassment I promise ♥ I can't bring myself to traumatise Church and I'm glad you pointed out that it sorts of look like something was wrong with him ^^ The only thing "wrong" is the plot device I used to have malec move in together haha :')

I appreciate this reader trusting me enough to point this out and letting me know how they feel.

I think it’s important to be aware of how this can be read. A beta would probably have told me how the chapter looked from an external point of view and suggested writing the same idea differently. As things are, I didn’t have a beta-reader for this fic.

Here is the reader’s reply:

Reader: Lol, good to know, although in my experience cats bring it on themselves, nosy little voyeurs that they are....

See how we solved the problem by simply having a conversation? This is why I appreciate concrit and do my best to treat readers well.

edit: upon checking in with the reader to make sure the post sat well with them, they told me they never meant it as criticism and actually found the chapter funny, their comment was written in a sarcastic manner that I totally missed!

There, you have it. I am full of good intentions and I still miss some of the meaning of the comment!

There was a second comment on the following chapter.

I’ll just mention that one of the cats dipped his paws in a can of paint and made a mess on the wall. One of the character makes a pet account on Instagram to post pictures of the cat’s “artwork” with paint.

Reader: I always love a story that ends on a happy ever after, although I do think alec was taking a big chance tying the rings to the cats collars, especially after the paint incident... we won’t go in to what I think of people having Instagram accounts for their pets, although the paining does sound nice...

This was a very cute story and I’m glad that they found their forever person :grin:

If you don’t get it, this reader and me disagree on pet accounts.

The fact is, they are allowed to express themselves, and they did it respectfully. I don’t think this comment is rude, and I don’t think this reader feels “entitled”. Quite the contrary, they’re polite and felt comfortable enough to let me know what they think.

I didn’t argue with them. My reply consisted in politely reminding everyone who might read this story that this is a work of fiction, and that it’s here for both the reader’s and the author’s entertainment.

Myulalie: Well, I definitely don't recommend doing your proposal this way IRL, fortunately stories are a safe space to make crazy proposals for entertainment's sake :')

I'm glad you liked the ending! Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me all throughout the story, I really appreciated our chats ♥

edit: I thought we disagreed. We chatted again and they told me they don't have IG so they don't see the point of running 2 accounts, which fair. Because I used to run a pet account for my dog, I felt "attacked" where I absolutely wasn't.

One more example of misinterpretation!

I think the only way forward is together.

Authors deserve respect for their work, it doesn’t exempt them from being polite. Readers might need some sort of education on “comment etiquette”, and should be respected in return.

I want this platform to be a safe space for authors AND for readers.

#pearling down to business #on writing #commenting #comment culture #ao3 #concrit #constructive criticism #fanfiction

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vios-rockland-corner · 4 years

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Nightmare Realized

“Nightmare Realized” is a short visual novel/game that acts as a teaser for the first upcoming Misfits horror game, “The Misfits: First Blood.”

It’s a haunting precursor for the events that will come, and a good look at one of the characters.

I highly recommend playing it through first (it only takes less than 5 minutes). Otherwise, I’ll be placing my random thoughts below for fun.

[Spoilers below for Nightmare Realized, Rumors of Rockland Article 1, and The Misfits: First Blood demo]

I absolutely loved this teaser. Especially the way it was presented. It’s pretty short, so I’ve decided what I’ll do here is make a bullet list of any little thing that caught my eye. Once that’s done, I’ll decide what I want to talk about more (I may not address every single bullet point).

1. Rory Stryker is a kind person at least to Syndey and Tyler.

2. Tyler might possibly get his drugs from his mother (not clear if she got him into drugs or if she just provides- the phrase “drug abuse” is stated though).

3. It sounds like…Sydney has trouble being nice with his blood family usually (like his mother and Tyler)

4. Something is VERY wrong with Sydney.

5. Sydney may have an obsession with either blades or using them (or both…possibly blood too).

6. Getting to hear the knives’ “songs often now” implies that he is becoming more active (possibly to hurt or kill people).

7. Quill, similarly to how he was portrayed in the demo, has a huge ego. And yes, even his friends think he’s a d*ck.

8. Sydney considers Quill, Chase and Kinley as family. Possible even more so than his blood family from what I can tell.

9. There are romantic relationships among the four. It’s implied they all may love each other. Outlaw has a lot of polyamorous and pansexual characters, so this isn’t unusual. That’s why Sydney’s description for each of the three feels like a genuine love confession. I might say from these depictions they do share, but there are favored partners for each person (Chase-Quill and Syndey-Kinley)? But I need to be careful about what I say since I’m not familiar with this dynamic. (Btw creators, if this is rude for me to comment on, I’ll try to avoid the topic in the future and edit this part out).

10. Chase is nonbinary and used to be mute. They were also abandoned when they were younger. [Note: I actually knew this already from some Patreon notes, but I thought it’d be good to make that clear here]

11. All four characters, happily engage in “hunting.” Obviously, they’re not talking about game hunting here. If you’ve played the Misfits: First Blood demo, it was mentioned that these guys DO go after people as a pack sometimes.

One of the biggest things about this game is it’s the first time I believe we’ve gotten to see a glimpse into Sydney’s personality. Even better, we get a direct look into his psyche since this is POV. Syndey’s character has been around, but before this game we’ve only had artwork and Quill mentioning his name briefly in the demo. There weren’t any clues for what this guy was like.

Right off the bat we can see Sydney is very off. It sounds like he usually puts in the bare minimum when it comes to functioning and interacting with others. He sounds very out of it. He only gets more lively and emotions once Quill and the rest of his friends come into the picture. Let’s not forget either the sinister urges we see invading his mind at an alarming rate. This is apparently a dangerous trait he’s had for a long time. It’s almost like he can’t help himself.

What was really interesting to me was the very beginning actually. I’m really curious what kind of relationship Sydney has with his family. Compared to his friends, his blood family is either a lot lower on his priority list or he just has a lot of issues connecting with any of them. We still don’t know what the Stryker family does yet, but that could play a part in this. I wonder, since he seems slightly disconnected from his immediate family, if any of them are aware of Sydney’s “hunting hobby.” His parents are part of “The Professionals” group, so they’re not innocent themselves. But I don’t know how much each party influences or is involved with the other here. Unlike with Quill and his father Alchemy (another “Professional”) where we do know from the demo that Quill learned from Alchemy.

I’m also more curious now about Tyler. We got a good introduction to Tyler in the Rumors of Rockland Article 1 that was released. He seemed pretty chipper and easy going there. But I don’t know if he has his own problems. He’s a drug dealer and…yeah it’s very possible that he’s also addicted to drugs as well. Sydney specifically uses the phrase “drug abuse,” but I can’t quite figure out if he means Tyler is abusing drugs, or it’s some kind of influence by his mother. Like I said, she could be a dealer herself. There’s something twisted there.

Whatever the case, Tyler and his mother seem to be much closer to each other than Sydney is to either of them. It doesn’t FEEL like Sydney has any malice towards either of the two, but I’d need more information to be sure. Sydney’s apparently not always nice to Tyler, but Sydney doesn’t seem to pay attention to this fact in his daily life.

One thing I loved about this game is how it progresses. We start off with Sydney clearly not having a wonderful morning (he’s very distracted). Then we slowly meet up with Quill, Chase and Kinley. The minute Quill comes into the picture, Sydney becomes more emotional and thoughtful. We get to meet Chase and we’re distracted by the depiction of this small character with a sad past. Then we’re suddenly reminded something. These people are monsters. Despite the casual setting at the arcade, once Quill brings up “hunting,” we the audience see the wolves hiding beneath these playful characters through wonderfully dark visuals. Even cute little Chase has a wicked grin on their face.

There’s even a brief moment where Kinley is introduced and Sydney is able to return to a calm, loving state for a moment (after getting excited over the thought of blood). Kinley’s a psychologist who took care of his unwell mother at a young age. He seemed to be picking up on Sydney’s excitement here. So for a brief moment…you think MAYBE Kinley has come over to calm Sydney down and drive away his more murderous thoughts? NOPE. We’re quickly shown that this man is no different from the other three. They ALL crave a hunt. No matter how beautiful you paint a picture of each on the outside, they all have thorns underneath like a rose.

And in a twisted way, Sydney feels more connected with these three because he DOESN’T feel like a monster here. They are all the same. Which of course, is horrifying as a viewer. They’re probably far less likely to feel remorse for their actions if they know there are other people like themselves around to share their sick hobbies with.

It’s a chilling and perfect teaser for the inevitable Misfits game. The message is clear: Don’t trust any of them.

Side note: I personally look forward to seeing more egotistical Quill. I love it even though I want to punch him in the face sometimes.

#Nightmare Realized #rockland #the misfits #runawayoutlaw #rottenbonethief #Sydney Dixie #Quinton Willow #Chase Knox #Ashley Kinley #Rockland Games #horror game #teaser

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askneruandhaku · 5 years

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Disrespectful behavior towards Neru, Haku and their fans

This is a letter of complaint, venting and opening my heart to you guys about a subject that has to do with the blog and matters lots to me.

I usually don’t address the disrespect towards fanloids and fanloid fans i’ve been seeing from Vocaloid purists since the very day i made this blog, but today is a heavy topic day.

As you guys know Miku is no longer gonna be a Vocaloid. What that means to the relationship between Piapro and Neru/Haku i do not know. If they’re gonna appear in Mega39s, if Crypton will use their image rights ever again and so forth is to be seen. But what’s going on in the Vocaloid Wiki is something i have seen coming for a couple of years now.

The Vocaloid WIki has been on a Vocaloid purism purge for a good couple of years. It started with the deletion of some character pages that were confirmed not Vocaloid like Alys or Meaw and it’s extending now to Teto, Vocalina, Acme Iku, etc. The topic of deleting fanloids was brought up by the same person who was doing the purge at the time and was ignored. Now that Miku is abandoning Vocaloid this user who to put it as kindly as i can has a hateboner for fanloids is taking the chance to get their pages completely deleted, arguing there’s the much copypasted, much more bare-bones and disorganized fanloid wiki for them if anything.

The initial purpose for Neru, Haku, Sakine, Hachune, etc having pages on the Vocawiki was to avoid confusion and correct the idea clueless fans have about them being Vocaloids. It’s there to inform and archive facts, story, trivia. I am someone against Vocaloid purism and deletion of information (fe all the interesting information on the Meaw project has been lost FOREVER wiped from the entire internet because their only wiki page with their profile and history was deleted by this same user) because it never hurts anyone to archive all the interesting tidbits things this Vocaloid fandom overall has gone through. It’s not occupying space on your computer so i don’t understand why it’s harmful for it to exist online for the curious to learn.

Because of my opposition to this direction i already had my qualms towards this user but on top of that they have given me reasons to believe they actually loathe Neru and Haku.

There are no comment sections more policed and controlled than Neru and Haku’s in the wiki. Any innocent fun cheeky comment under their page will recieve a lengthy reply from this person shutting the fan down because Neru/Haku are unoriginal Miku copies, “irrelevant” and “just memes”. It’s very disheartening for fans and disrespectful. They spread tons of misconception like saying Haku was made as a form of bullying users or that Neru and Haku have no merchandise since 2013. I myself bought official NeruHaku Piapro badges from the Animate store in my trip to Japan in 2017. Sega released in 14 a macaron set with Neru and Haku’s logos which Piapro reported on. Crypton staff featured a Haku song in their official “classics” Vocaloid collection in their playlist site Kiite... this same year.

Moreover, this person has a DA account which they use to comment rude things under MANY!! Neru/Haku artworks (such as "if they disappeared tomorrow it would have no impact") and try to get fans to ditch them for "real Vocaloids" instead, f.e. leaving comments like “sigh i’d love to see you draw Miku” (instead of Haku, etc).

Their crusade against Neru and Haku specifically borders on obsessive to me. I understand trying to clarify what's a Vocaloid and what's not to people, but why is it so important to you that you go out of your way to BROWSE arts of characters you dislike and pressure people into not drawing them any longer.

Bigger version here

Please don't listen to comments like this if you ever get them, block and move on. You're in the right to draw and love whatever characters you want no matter their recognition or label. There is a decently sized Japanese community of Neru and Haku fans over on Twitter so don't get a devastating picture of "nobody cares about those characters and if you do you're outdated" from these misinformed comments. Don't feel crazy or wrong for loving Neru and Haku in 2019 even OVER actual Vocaloids, there are many of us who love them still the most.

This is not my first rodeo with Vocaloid purists saying horrible things about Neru and Haku, however this time i had to speak on it since the person is involved in Wiki editing and it's going to affect the information available for all of us on their history, official links, artwork/concept art, most popular songs etc. This person themselves is also running the new Piapro Studio Wiki which means they will also have no future over there (even though Crypton’s Wat has recently tweeted being interested in including more characters in the MMD Piapro official model lineup in the future).

There is no point in protesting to such a stubborn person, so i’m just gonna archive Neru and Haku’s pages on the wayback machine and post links for everyone in the future. Personally i have no energy anymore to compile info, translate and make my own site about them.

But i want you guys to know. Even if i disappear for a year or two, for a long time. You all will always have a place here in my blog as Neru and Haku fans, you are valid. You enjoy whatever fanloid you want. You stan your dead fanloid, your dead Vocaloid, your Hibiki Lui, hell, whatever. Screw people who only see facts, software and data. Even their popularity “status” or recognition. Many people love Leon, Lola, Miriam, Piko... to this day. A fictional character dies when YOU decide it, when it doesn’t exist in anyone’s thoughts anymore. Not when a truly irrelevant “authority” figure Hereby Declares your Fave has Henceforth Become Irrelevant.

I made this blog at 19. I’m almost 30 now. And i still love Neru and Haku as much as when i first made this blog, if not even more!! Neru and Haku allowed me to meet some of the most amazing people in my e-life, like all of you askblog mods, but related to the subject in particular, some NeruHaku fans such as @ask-neru-and-or-haku who i still talk to every single day.

Life got super difficult and tragic for me so i’ve been having difficulties to post; partly it’s adulthood but partly just my luck (had three people die on me on the course of running this askblog... two a couple months ago). But thinking about Neru, Haku, the people they brought into my life. Makes me so happy.

I wish i could be back posting here everyday. I will be back for sure, from time to time, sporadically doing answerbombs in rampages... until i’m very old i hope :) but in the meantime have my blog as a safe Neru Haku loving space. A little shrine blog. I won’t tolerate disrespect towards my daughters here or bullying towards any of you Neru and Haku fans.

Phew... that’s it. Some good old venting and... sad but unsurprising news coming from this dry, canon-limited new wave in the fandom. Not “canon” to Vocaloid or Piapro? Gotta go!

RIP Neru and Haku Vocaloid Wiki entries (2009-20??)

#akita neru #yowane haku #vocaloid #yeah i DO dare use this tag fight me #OOC #sorry about so many OOC post but this really rustled my jimmies #this is not a callout post #its not to harass the person #but im concerned about you guys getting messages like these and getting discouraged or made feel uncomfortable for supporting the girls #and i don't want you all to become surprised if their wiki entries go oop- and disappear suddenly

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ifeveristoday · 4 years

Text

[video description: just me yelling for seven minutes straight]

Ok. Am I ready for this?

Every issue of the Boom! Verse has been building up layers of characterizations and the aftermaths of choices. Issue 9 shows us the fallout of two major events - the showdown at Sunnydale Museum, and Xander’s half Vampire state (and what Willow had to do to get him there).

It also touches on the fact that Buffy is in the Hellmouth with no way to contact the surface world.

Yet that isn’t the most pressing matter in this issue.

Relationships are frayed.

Everyone in the Scooby Gang is isolated.

Jenny has a cat.

Sorry, that’s not thematically relevant but I, as a cat person, am legally bound to discuss when there is a cat in media.

JENNY HAS A GREY TABBY WHAT IS THEIR NAME

Spoilers and reactions to issue nine under the cut - we scream and flail like men, who needs a review?

PTSD CLUB PTSD CLUB PTSD CLUB

edited to correct that bit about Willow’s hair and level of evil it indicates

Something that Jordie used early on is the narrator POV (unreliable perhaps) and it returns to this issue. But instead of Xander or Willow, it’s Joyce. And she’s grieving about the world she’s lost but what every parent knows in the back of their mind: the world is tough and scary and so many bad things can happen. And Joyce has survived the attack but there’s no Buffy to commiserate with, to fuss over in person. (Also, what a nod to Joyce’s obliviousness in TV canon - to believe that Buffy would just go on a mandatory field trip with no phone connection.) Luckily, she has Eric, who is supportive and says all the right things.

Joyce’s disconnect with what she feels and the outside world’s determination to ‘life goes on’ is repeated in the rest of the issue, as our favorite Sunnydale residents deal with both small and large terrors.

Revelations besides Jenny’s cat:

Cordelia works in a clothing shop and there are some Portland looking dudes roaming around Sunnydale. Or maybe it’s Silver Lake. She still has a crush on Spike, because who hasn’t met a mysterious, well-muscled stranger emerging from the forest like a person-shaped Cheshire cat and thought, “Gotta get me some of that?”

I mean, a whole fairytale industry has grown up around that idea.

But despite all normal appearances (and Cordelia is the still most ‘normal’ character) and her Cordy Crew updates, life is not going to her plans. There are fissures erupting in the sidewalk, cracks appearing in walls, people are stressed and Cordelia can’t even play with her dog without falling over said fissures. Oh, and her books are dissolving into ash when she opens her locker.

So shit is horrible.

Willow’s dyed a black streak in her hair (honey, red hair is the hardest color to re-dye to. Your hair is so beautiful and now you’ve got to tone and strip the fuck out of that streak if you want a base to dye it red again - oh wait, magic, I guess) and is being rude and abrupt and just plain Not Willow with Rose and everyone.

Except Willow chafes at the idea of there being a standard for her - why should she be just the smart capable responsible one? While a vampire doppelganger doesn’t burst out of the wall and drawls that she’s bored now, Willow is resentful that Rose and everyone else expects her to be one way when hello, the world is on fire outside.

Rose has found out about the weird shit that goes on in Sunnydale and accuses Willow of keeping things from her, including giant bats and the fact that Buffy was there, and she, Willow’s girlfriend and considerably known her longer than Buffy (imp.) wasn’t there or told about it.

Willow naturally thinks that Rose being jealous of Buffy is just stupid, because Buffy isn’t even there and honestly she’s not even thinking about it. Which causes Rose to worry why is her empathetic Willow like this?

Which makes Willow lash out that she’s tired of having to be the one who has to consider everyone else’s feelings but her own? Why can’t she have the space to figure out what she wants?

And like that, Rose and Willow are on a break.

Xander, in direct contrast to everyone else around him, is calm and sensitive and just generally being a good bean. He’s concerned about Willow and Buffy, but he’s not crowding Willow. He’s patrolling in Buffy’s absence and making stakes and friends with raccoons - and all of his warm-heartedness and acceptance of ‘everyone’s journey is different’ upsets Giles, who is stubbly and running on presumably zero sleep as he worries about Buffy, and the break in his relationship.

Xander’s facade of handling all the weird crap Sunnydale’s thrown at him gets blown when he encounters a vampire delivery boy in the cemetery. He wins the fight, but the vampire’s words taunting him that they’re just monsters, and not in-between--unfinished like Xander is, resonates with him. Xander’s been doing so well, learning how to live and cope with his depression, being a good friend and responsible evil thwarter - and then to have Giles dismiss him so coldly? And to have one of his worst fears spoken out loud - he’s not human anymore. Not in the way that it used to count. And he’s only half a vampire - and there’s no one else straddling that line so he’s still alone.

Everyone needs a hug.

Especially Giles and Jenny, because shit, things get incredibly real in the next act. Giles heads over to Jenny’s house to make some kind of amends, but Jenny is understandably Not Having It. Giles disregards all of her reasonable requests, pushes past her and enters her home and then tries to make her understand how really, she’s wrong and he’s right and MAYBE IF SHE HADN’T GIVEN THE DAGGER TO DRUSILLA, THE WORLD WOULDN’T BE ON FIRE.

This is a mess. In so many ways Giles is wrong - he ignored her request to stay away, he invited himself in - and then spent too long trying to make excuses for why it was OK for him to do all of that shit. And he looks a hot mess while doing so - I don’t even think it’s the artwork style, it’s just that Giles is wild-eyed, wrecked, and actually slavering at the mouth as he tries to explain his point of view. He’s feverish and Jenny puts aside her anger for a minute to get him a glass of water. Like, yes, she’s furious with him, but she still loves him, even though this scary man practically foaming at the mouth doesn’t really look like her partner.

Jenny presses him on his attempt to protect them all, asking pointedly, what about her?

Giles automatically assumes she’s talking about Buffy and assures her that he knows Buffy’s capable of fending for herself, which is exactly the Wrong Thing to Say, because as previous issues have shown, Jenny is not cool with children having to save the world, and also, Buffy’s mom? How about her, Fuckhead Watcher Man.

And Giles goes and puts his whole head up his ass as he says that there are sacrifices that come with successes, as in any war - and Jenny loses it. Because Giles rants do you think that it’s easy for him to live to believe that everything in his life is disposable except for Buffy? That nothing else matters?

And Jenny reads the underlining footnote - if nothing matters, where does that leave her in his life?

FOR FUCK’S SAKE GILES YOU’RE DERANGED GO HOME

And Jenny’s cat agrees with me and hisses at him to leave Jenny alone.

Giles exits the house wondering aloud has everyone gone mad, while a suspicious rabbit looks on from the grass.

There’s a Tucker Wells/Andrew shades of who the fuck cares interlude about a lonely kid who stalks his school facebook to read the comments about classmates and I might be callous, but I actually do not care about those type of characters because guess what, lots of lonely kids and people out there and their first thought is not to kill everyone else. Anyway, I suspect this is a side effect of the Hellmouth magnifying negative thoughts.

It lingers on Buffy’s face and the comments - “She’s weird but hot.”

Now imagine that being her epitaph.

This pans over to the last sequence - Robin is chilling at home, and his dad (!!!) tells him to go to bed, he doesn’t care how much this town is falling apart. Robin’s dad believes in education.

And guess who shows up at his door in the late of night?

KENDRA.

And she hits him with a Star Wars reference. “Aren’t you a little short for a watcher?”

#i fucking live #boom! studios #spoilers and reactions #buffy comics

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wakasagayhime · 5 years

Text

very long, very personal post

tldr, im still not drawing but here’s a detailed account of everything that’s happened in case anyone is confused or misinformed

alright. let me start out by saying i’m not going back to art just yet. it still hurts to do anything art related and i’m still trying to find a way to heal from all of this. i need some kind of professional help first, and i don’t know how long it’ll take afterwards for me to begin feeling like myself again. i don’t even know if i’ll be able to get any kind of professional help at the moment; my university’s counseling center told me, in short, that i’m so mentally ill that their services would not be enough for me and i’d have to look elsewhere (which is reasonable, tbh, they’re almost always completely booked so it’s difficult to actually even talk to someone there in the first place, i only got to talk to them to begin with because i nearly killed myself one night after having the most intense panic attack of my life where i felt like i was actually in the process of dying) and as if that weren’t enough, if you follow me on twitter you’d know that my mom finally left my stepdad, but this means that we no longer really have a home to call our own and are now living with some of my mom’s friends. on the bright side, miso is a lot freer and gets to explore the house as he pleases, but on the downside money is tight and my mom is trying her best to find a place to live while working two jobs and trying to help pay for my tuition. long story short, i want some kind of professional help badly, but all the bullshit that’s been happening in my life makes that difficult.

anyway, i understand that i’ve worried a lot of people through all of this, and i’m sorry. i truly, genuinely am sorry for everything that’s been going on. i blame a lot of it on myself not being strong enough. if i were stronger, i wouldn’t care about some stupid internet trolls, or some random grown man in florida stalking all my social media. if i were stronger, i could take my life back. i wouldn’t feel the need to constantly contemplate suicide, or to torture my own body by starving because of my physical form feeling like the only thing i have left to be in control of. if i had only been stronger, like my old stupidly foolish overconfident 16 year old self who got into fucking STEVEN UNIVERSE DISCOURSE of all things, maybe i wouldn’t care. even when it first happened to me, after the initial shock and hiatus, i was pretty much back to normal almost instantly. but this kind of trauma is sneaky and will gradually eat away at you more and more while you pretend to be ok, and then eventually you reach a breaking point and it’s taken over your life. that’s why i’m still obsessing over that day two years later. that’s why i can’t be left alone on december 13th this year, or else i know for a fact i will harm myself in some way. (don’t worry about that though, burger is going to hang out with me that day and i’ll be fine.) still, even though i keep telling myself my past self was stronger, i do know that she really wasn’t. she was still struggling with depression, anxiety, and self harm issues. maybe it just manifested differently for a while. maybe she felt unstoppable at some point in time because she finally found a girlfriend and got a cat. i got into so many fights that weren’t worth my time or energy at all, and part of me wishes i could be that confident again, but i also know that was my downfall to begin with.

i have followers who haven’t been around for longer than a year or maybe less than two, so i might as well give everyone a true, thorough rundown of what happened leading up to that day, the day of, and after.

i’m sure a lot of you who are worried about me at the moment have seen the recent callout for colboh and his involvement in what happened. i’ll be honest--i don’t know the full extent of his involvement, and i want to believe his foolishness ends at not leaving artists who have blocked him alone and uploading their shit to booru sites when they explicitly state not to. so let’s just start there. i honestly don’t remember if it was before or after i first blocked him, but he uploaded one of my NSFW drawings to danbooru when i first shared my NSFW blog. (PROTIP: if you’re a minor, don’t share your NSFW art with anyone. don’t care if you’re 17, i was about to turn 17 myself. it will bite you in the ass. as such, some of this is my fault.) i quickly contacted danbooru asking them to delete it, and they did--but that artwork subsequently ended up on gelbooru as well, and i was unsuccessful in my efforts to remove my art from there.

fast forward to december 13th, 2016. it was a normal morning. i was getting ready for school, but also being dumb and lazing around in bed browsing tumblr. i saw a post from a blog that shares Funny 4chan Screencaps. my art was in it. the art was of a very muscular yuugi, a drawing i was proud of, especially in how much gay energy i thought it radiated--but this drawing was being used in one of those typical “here’s a touhou, i wanna fuck her! am i right guys? let’s talk about how badly we want to fuck her” threads. seeing my art used for this was appalling. my first mistake was reblogging the post and saying how it was wrong, and how my art shouldn’t ever be used for such a purpose. my second mistake was making a text post AND tweets expressing my disgust at the situation, thinking no one who frequented /jp/ would ever see, sure that it would be a big waste of their time to concern themselves with some random dumb “”sjw”” artist. i also probably shouldn’t have specifically called them “gross neckbeards,” in doing so i absolutely struck a nerve with basement dwellers everywhere. i got to school and during my second period class, suddenly felt a strange urge to look at /jp/. why i did that, i still don’t really know. maybe i was expecting hate. maybe i was trying to see if they used my art for something gross again. i don’t know. either way, that moment changed everything forever. i saw the screencap of my tweets posted for everyone in their circlejerk to see. even worse--i looked in the thread, and someone had also posted the NSFW art colboh had uploaded to danbooru, mocking it and calling me a hypocrite for drawing two girls having sex while also saying i don’t like my art being used for those kinds of threads. this is what truly ignited the amount of hate i saw directed towards me in the threads. i got called a bitch, a drama whore, got told to kill myself, and in one reply etched into my mind forever, someone said something along the lines of “we should all call her local gang and have them rape her, she just needs a good dicking.” there were multiple threads, too; i don’t know how many, but there was another one about me after the first one was deleted, in which someone edited a typical fat balding NTR hentai doujin style man into art i made of kagerou nosebleeding at wakasagihime. more disparaging comments were made. in both threads, people expressed their hatred and dislike of my art, some calling it garbage, some just saying it’s “bad,” etc. some people said the threads were unnecessary and rude, but they were a kind few in a cesspool of violence.

i don’t know who started these threads. i can’t assume anything about anyone, but whoever did this was definitely looking through all my social media out of bitterness and hatred, or perhaps even following me on both my tumblr and twitter considering the timing of the threads immediately after i complained. it eats at me that i most likely will never know who did this to me. i’ll never know who hated me so much that they decided to completely destroy my self esteem. if whoever it is who did all of this is reading this and feels any ounce of remorse, i’m begging them to reveal themselves and why they did it, but i know the chances of that happening are incredibly slim. someone, i can’t remember who, maybe it was queenly, told me they hope someday i reach a point where i don’t have to worry about that because i won’t care in general, but i still don’t know if i’ll ever reach a point where i stop caring about all of this.

like i mentioned earlier, after this all first happened, i was destroyed. the next day, my school’s GSA happened to have a vote for whose art would be on the club t-shirts, mine or someone else’s. mine lost. i broke down completely--anywhere i went, i wasn’t good enough, not for anyone. for days, there was a constant feeling of horror and fear in my chest, something i’ve only ever felt so intensely when one of these threads resurfaces or i suddenly relive my trauma due to other things triggering me. i took a hiatus that lasted a few weeks, i believe i came back sometime before the new year. i thought i was ok, and i pretended like i could go back to being myself. but as time went on, and i continued living with the weight of that day on my back, i became weaker and weaker. i stopped drawing as frequently as i used to. my final year of high school started and i ended up falling into such a deep depression that i constantly skipped school and eventually attempted suicide in november 2017. the suicide note i wrote cites that day as being one of the main things leading me to my decision, telling whoever did this to me that i hoped in my passing they’d have to live knowing what they did to me. my attempt only failed because i swore to take every pill left in the bottle and there were only four pills. had it been full, i’m not really sure what would have happened. i was sent to a mental institute afterwards for a week. being there was the absolute definition of hell. i was alone. i cried myself to sleep every night. they claimed to be a place where people were improved and got help, but i did not get any help at all. they basically imprisoned me for trying to kill myself. when i got out, i was only glad to be alive because i just wanted to be able to talk to my friends, my family, and my girlfriend again. it still shocks me that i was able to graduate from high school considering how much school i skipped before and after my suicide attempt.

sometime before that school year ended, i became extremely upset one afternoon and decided to run away from home. i had what happened to me and what was said about me that day running through my head. i tweeted that i hoped maybe in running away i’d end up being raped like they wanted, like how i deserved. someone who i considered a friend replied to this with, “fuck you.” after all of this was taken care of and i was safe at home, i responded that i was sorry, that i wasn’t thinking right when i made the tweet. she responded that i was, and blocked me. i tried to explain that i said what i did because of the threads about me on /jp/ and the one response threatening rape, but this was disregarded and, seemingly, ignored. a few days later, the former friend in question started sending me anon hate on tumblr, asking me why i want attention so badly, accusing me of making light of actual rape victims by saying such a thing. i explained myself, but to no avail. i blocked her on tumblr, and left it at that. but then, at the end of the school year, when i was proud of myself for finally getting through high school without killing myself or failing or anything, i stumbled upon the second thread. the date the thread was created lined up exactly with the time between me running away from home and me receiving anon hate. she can try to act like she didn’t make the thread all she wants, but i’m not an idiot. the replies were also eerily similar--people in the replies remembered me, a year and a half after the original thread. some replies mentioned me having attempted suicide months before. some mentioned my NSFW art again. i had a massive breakdown and nearly drowned myself in the pond down the road. it was a wet, rainy night, and i sat on a bench by the pond sobbing loudly, trying to find some way to want to keep living. but i couldn’t. i might have gone through with it if it hadn’t been for burger coming and talking to me and giving me a ride home.

entering college, i thought things would be easier. in a way, they are. i have more freedom with classes. this semester, i attended almost all of my classes, almost every day, just with the exception of me being sick some days and me accidentally oversleeping once, and then one day when i just didn’t feel like it. but things continued to get worse for me--i developed an eating disorder for many reasons, one being the time i spent a year prior depressed caused me to gain a significant amount of weight, and the other being i had sworn off self harm in the form of cutting. i found that i was able to get the same gratification from starving myself. at one point, it turned into a game of sorts, where i tried to see how long i could go without eating anything. my record was a little over 72 hours. being constantly hungry or in pain this way felt like something i deserved in a way, but also something to distract me from the pain of realizing i was losing my love for art. i was in denial about it for months. i tried to keep drawing, but everything i drew upset me, saddened me, and even angered me. i looked at anything i made and only felt disgust. it was the one thing i used to love doing more than anything, and now i only felt shame.

in november, i acknowledged this and decided to quit for good. recently, i discovered colboh had uploaded more of my NSFW art to gelbooru, even though i specifically stated on my blog to never upload my NSFW art to image sharing sites, specifically right after he uploaded my art the first time. by the time i found this, i had already sworn off art for good, but looking at the comments on my art on gelbooru (and rule 34--i guess they’re connected upload-wise like danbooru?) filled me with so much sadness and shame, not because they criticized my art, but because they said horrible things about my depiction of kagerou. for those who don’t know, i headcanon kagerou as a trans woman, and one thing i do not regret about my time as an artist is how that depiction has helped numerous trans women feel good about themselves and their bodies. seeing so many disgusting comments deliberately misgendering her and making other transphobic remarks hurt me on a completely new level. my trans friends have been such a source of strength for me through all of this and seeing that made me feel disgusted, especially with myself. i felt like i had failed them. i had made so many trans women happy, only to see a man i blocked two years ago had uploaded my art to porn sites, tagging it with dehumanizing words like “f*ta” that i specifically tell people never to refer to my art with, displaying that art for the exact same crowds of people that ruined everything december 13th 2016 to continue to pick apart. one comment even told me to kill myself, effectively bringing back every memory of that day.

speaking of that, another thing i want to touch on now that i’m up to speed with the details of everything that’s happened related to the original threads two years ago, is kagerou. i’m positive you all know that i really love kagerou imaizumi, and that she’s my favorite touhou character. it’s embarrassing to say, but she’s brought me so much comfort through all of this. sometimes if i’m sad, i’ll imagine her giving me a big hug, or i’ll look at cute pictures i have saved of her, or something along those lines. it’s pretty cringy for a fictional character to make me happy, i know, but i’ve grown so attached to her and she really means a lot to me. and another thing that made me want to swear off art is because she’s loved by so many others that i don’t think my depictions of her do her any good. i’m constantly compared to other artists, and it’s never good. even in the threads, i’m told i should be more like those other artists and these things wouldn’t happen to me. i am not allowed to love kagerou imaizumi. i draw her as a hairy trans lesbian, and that disgusts people. hell, the fact that i draw lesbians in general disgusts people, which sure fucking sucks because i constantly hate myself for not being attracted to men and being able to draw happy lesbians made me feel better about myself. but i’ve ruined kagerou for so many people, especially with my stupid kagewaka bullshit. maybe that’s why those artists unfollowed me. maybe it’s a combination of that and my constant breakdowns becoming far too annoying. i think all the popular artists who used to like me and then unfollowed/softblocked me are really glad to see that i’ve given up. and that’s something else that saddens me too--even as an artist, in my own community of touhou artists, i often feel like i’m lesser, and that i don’t belong. maybe it’s because i’m so foolishly outspoken about my opinions that they dislike me. maybe it’s because i’m a woman, and a lesbian at that. i don’t really know why they hate me so much. i wish i could belong somewhere.

and i think that’s what it all boils down to in the end. i’ve lost all sense of belonging. when i was 14 and people started noticing my art for the first time, i finally felt like i had something. like i belonged somewhere. after being bullied through middle school and having to deal with abusive friends and an abusive dad, it meant the world to me that i finally had something. but it didn’t last long at all. it all came crashing down, not just because of others, but because of me. i was the one who was cocky, getting into fights that weren’t worth it. i was the one who provoked people and made them hate me. i was the one who complained about /jp/ posting my art in their threads. i know people want to believe that i’m a saint, but i’m not. i have myself to blame too. i at least want everyone to understand this, above all else. there was so much i could have done differently to prevent this all from happening, but i didn’t. i was stupid and naive. i was a massive fucking idiot, and now look where i am. i lost everything. i thought i had friends, i lost them. i thought i loved art, i lost that. i thought other really talented nice people liked me, i even lost that. all i have now is an empty shell of my former self. i don’t know what to do with it. i don’t know how i’m going to rebuild myself. it’s so painful to have to keep living like this. i don’t know if there’s any fixing me at this point. i’ve lost so much, i feel permanently broken.

but despite all of that, despite everything i’ve been through, i still receive so much love and support from my followers and friends and it means so much to me. it means the world to me and has kept me going through all of this. knowing that people care about me and want to see me get better and improve makes me want to try to fix myself even if i am broken beyond repair. i just want to thank you all for being that source of strength for me. these past few years have been so hard for me and time and time again i still get love and encouragement from so many people. from the bottom of my heart, thank you. there is nothing more precious to me than those moments when i feel like i do truly belong, when i feel loved, when i feel like i’m not alone after all. for those moments, i’ll keep trying. even if these threads keep continuing and breaking me further, i’ll keep trying. even if every last artist in this fandom comes to hate me and my shitty art, i’ll keep trying. it’s still painful to draw right now and i have a long way to go before i can share art with anyone again, but for you all, i’m going to keep trying my best. at the end of the day, i know everyone’s encouragement and love is worth far more than hate threads urging me to kill myself.

i’m sorry how long and personal and unnecessary this is, but i felt like i had to set things straight. if you read all of this, i applaud you. if you just kinda skimmed through to read the last paragraph, i also appreciate it. again, thank you.

#glub glub #suicide //#self harm //#disordered eating //#rape //

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blankdblank · 6 years

Text

Richard Armitage x Artist Request

- Hope you like it!! -- Bit ‘heated’ towards the end but mostly fluff

Tags –

@himoverflowers, @theincaprincess, @aspiringtranslator, @sweeticedtea, @ggbbhehe4455, @thegreyberet, @patanghill17, @jesgisborne, @curvestrology, @abiwim, @deepestfirefun

…

With your eyes locked onto the sketchpad attachment for your desktop before you, square by square came into life bringing the final chapter of a short series you would soon add to your collection on your art pages with links to the videos you normally filmed to add to your small fan base’s enjoyment. With the first portrait you posted, one of Darth Vader you posted and sent to a friend for them in hopes of getting it as a tattoo a request was brought so your friends that enjoyed watching you bring your imagination to life you started filming your sketching and a few of your less intricate paintings. Since you’d left school you’d gained a following and with your videos brought a wider chance to receive requests and to answer questions from those less familiar with the process or your work.

Through your vast love of the fantasy genre you had a great deal of knowledge about the characters you were requested to create works for. Though lately with your notoriety came quite an unwelcome prank. For nearly a week now a teenager kept calling and calling after somehow getting your phone number claiming to be from an art magazine. Flattering sure, but from a teen that refused to allow you to speak to anyone else that actually knew the details of the story they wanted to supposedly write on you a flat out refusal was offered and so far still unaccepted.

Sighing mid explanation of your addition of a banana in the background of your latest story with Bofur and Nori traveling to Gondor your eyes shifted to the ringing phone then you glanced at the camera recording on your laptop to say, “Hold on guys.” Before your arm rose to hit the space bar to pause the taping as you gripped your phone to lift to your ears with a beep at your hitting the call button, “Bob’s Steakhouse You Kill ‘Em We Grill ‘Em!” Faking a cheerful tone before you giggled softly and said, “Oh, Sorry dad. No thought it was the prank caller again. How’s it all with you back home?”

Your smile grew as you lowered your pencil pausing your creation until the conversation was through. Bringing a sense of ease to your mood before you hung up and started your video with another apology before finishing your answer for the question that was posted on your page before answering the next dozen while you uploaded the completed image to your page before adding the video up to your youtube page after a brief edit.

Stretching after a groan escaped you as the phone rang again, answering the teen’s voice rang out again only to die as you hung up and quickly punched in the number you found online for the magazine that rang and was promptly answered by a warm caring voice of a young woman who seemed just eager to help. Within moments of asking, your call was transferred to the manager of the department the teen had claimed to be from with a stern man who seemed agitated beyond belief answered with a forced pleasant tone. “_ Art Magazine, Henry Callem speaking.”

Standing to start a pace you asked in your pleasantest of tones, “I was wondering if you’re doing a spread on the artist Honey Pear?”

Blinking the clenching of his jaw could be heard from over the phone as you imagined his powerful glare being aimed at the teen who shrank to the size of a grape and fled, “We are trying to but we can’t seem to get them to agree to it. How exactly would you know that?”

Tensing for a moment you blinked and replied, “Well you’ve got her on the phone now. And for the love of everything purple do not put me back on with Travis!”

Blinking his lips parted lowering the phone to glance at it then to raise it back to his ear to rapidly spit out, “Has, has he been rude to you?”

“Not exactly, but he isn’t exactly informed on what your point of the artwork you wanted for the magazine was supposed to be. Just kept mumbling about having to make more calls and refused to pass me along to another person who knew what was actually wanted.”

“Miss Pear.” His throat cleared as you heard the creaking of his leather chair as he reclined, “Travis must have mistaken what I told him. It’s not so much of a spread as a piece about you and your work. More specifically your work about the Hobbit franchise. Now we pitched the idea and out of all your work the most popular results came back about your work on Thorin and Richard Armitage, whose Agent actually called us when he found out about our poll. He’s willing to sit to do a piece on his reactions to one of his more accomplished fan’s work.”

Frozen your body locked then released as your heart started again through your legs lowering you onto the arm of your couch, “So, just so I have this straight, you’re wanting me to, what sketch Mr Armitage in the interview?”

He chuckled briefly, “No, see the poll was on suggested pieces you should bring to life and we were hoping you would do the top three while we get a brief piece on Mr Armitages’ views on his fans’ artwork inspired by his various characters and the rest will be about you and your building websites featuring your artwork and videos. Does that sound like something you’d be willing to do?” Biting his lip anxiously awaiting your answer.

Blinking again you struggled with the one syllable before it just slipped out, “Yes, yes it sounds, yes.”

He chuckled again drawing eyes towards his glass encased office as he swing his fist happily before grabbing his pen and pad of paper as you both chose a loose appointment for you to come in for the interview. Before he hung up to call the Agent back to double check which of the dates were available, soon leaving you a giggling and squealing mess at the confirmed date.

…

Trembling and nearly numb your hands tingled as you ceased the brief shake you put them through, eyeing your reflection. A dress wasn’t you, not when you worked, so your favorite jeans and an imagined lucky shirt with a trex across the back over your favorite heels, because you didn’t need to feel any smaller that you already are, along with a hope the extra few inches might add to your confidence.

Just don’t pass out, or squeal or turn red. Maybe pink, I can live with pink, you can lie and say it’s warm, or cold..

Shaking your hands again you exhaled filling your backpack with your supplies before making the trip across town to the magazine catching a glimpse of the camera surrounded car causing you to bump into the doorman. An elderly man who gave you a smile as you apologized before giving you the proper directions to follow as the voices grew louder behind you.

A short elevator ride later after making sure your long ponytail was secured to remain out of your way through the sketching. Forcing your faint smile to remain on your face you entered the crowded floor of people anxiously waiting for the actor you had beaten upstairs. Holding your expression your eyes shifted to the gangly teen that nudged the stern man’s side as he looked over the notes of what was expected causing him to look at the teen who was pointing at you as his lips formed your name.

Turning his head Mr Callem approached with a smile offering his hand for a brief hand shake before showing you through to the private meeting room you would be working in allowing you to pull out your things and look over the list of ideas from the poll they had offered. Sitting back your legs crossed trough your lean flipping the page your hand slid over your basic pencil grabbing your sketchbook to mock up a stick figure model of the top three in a few varying layouts with arrows and scribbled notes including various runes and symbols that were requested.

Drawing your lip inside your mouth you missed the tall actor stopped just outside the meeting room eyeing your lounged frame darting your bright eyes from one sheet to the other between random flicks to double check another. Barely listening to the rambling story of the teen that had nearly broken the deal for him and his Agent as well.

His eyes trailed over you again with slowly parting lips at the growing wonder at how such a young woman could have gained such a following through this. Early twenties was the guess his Agent had given when he skimmed over a few of your videos before managing to get him to agree. Though the focused gaze you held revealed the chance of you merely appearing younger than you were, with small lines forming between your brows as his eyes trailed to your teeth pinning your bottom lip as he managed to answer the latest of the teen’s questions.

Shifting his gaze back to Mr Callem who strolled through the door he watched your expression shift with the freeing of your lip as the sun was allowed to shine on your amber eyes drawing them to a soft honey tone causing the corner of Richard’s mouth to quirk up when they shifted and landed on him. Stepping forward he moved around the teen being drug away, knowing he would only irritate you both again, while Richard moved closer to the table eyeing you set the book and pencil down on the table as you rose driving his smile wider at your short stature. Within the momentary shift upright your entire expression shifted drawing a bright yet slightly nervous smile through your anxious quiet chuckle before claiming his large hand with your slender hand as he said, “You must be Honey.”

His smile grew larger eyeing over your growing smile as you nodded, “Well it’s Suzsienne, actually, but everyone outside family calls me Honey.”

Smiling larger at your flashing French accent soon gone again after, your hands released as you glanced at the Agent who introduced himself accepting your handshake as well before you stole another glance at Richard, who still had his eyes fixed on yours. Inhaling slowly you glanced at Mr Callem again claiming your seat as he offered saying, “Seems like you’re already laying the groundwork.” With a smile he broke your focus thankfully from the blue eyes gazing beams into the side of your head as his large frame settled into the seat across from you adjusting his jacket over his button down shirt and jeans.

Your smile flashed a bit larger as you answered, “Just the extra details.”

Shifting your eyes again you spotted Richard’s eyes scanning over your rough doodles leaving him wondering what they could be while his brows pressed together curiously. Turning his gaze away you were able to draw a steady breath as he shifted his chair to face Mr Callem as a photographer came in to snap pictures of your artwork as it progressed. Stealing another glance at you Richard watched as you tore the example doodles page free to set aside, giving him a clearer glance at the jumbled messes.

Your fingers blindly slid over their wooden coating before landing on your simple black pencil. Smiling again his eyes landed on the man again missing your first strokes, breezing through his rambling answer only glancing back again at the sideways glance catching your fingers sliding over another blindly with your bottom lip claimed for another bite while those lines grew with your concentration again.

Looking at the page his lips parted seeing the simple prompt nearly mocked out in bold thick lines as you raised the green pencil next for a few highlighting details after simply tapping the unsharpened end twice, flipping it then pressing it to the page adding the simplistic details shifting it from adequate closer to extraordinary. Of course the Bofur centered image wasn’t a surprise as he was told the Dwarf was your most popular lately with your added slew of adventures for him. But without even realizing it as his interview had ended Nori was fit into the background in the nearly 3D artwork before the latest of the pictures was snapped at its completion with the addition of a small gnome on top of a pear in the center of your signature.

Sliding it across the table towards Mr Callem your fingers selected the basic black pencil again to start on the first layer of the second and Dwalin centered drawing that Richard smiled larger at in anticipation with a hope he could send a picture to Graham upon its completion. Lowering his eyes again he dreaded touching it in hopes of possibly damaging it in some way, treating it as if it was some immaculate piece of classical art before he felt your flashing gaze as he gave his opinion on it.

Turning back to the man he skimmed through yet another stream of artwork from other fans giving you some time to complete your second piece before his eyes trailed back to you as you answered each question you were given quite animatedly with your eyes still fixed on the page. Soon enough Richard snapped and sent his picture of your sketch of Dwalin choking another Dwarf over the cookies he’d stolen from him to his friend drawing a laugh from him as he said, “Graham asked if he could have a copy of that one to frame.”

Freezing your eyes rose to the actor again with a stunned blink then eyeing the drawing you were currently working on hoping and failing to hide your growing blush as Mr Callem agreed if you did as they were only going to scan copies for their magazine and pass the originals back. Smiling again Richard and his Agent stood and moved to lean over your shoulders, watching as the intricate battle scene came into life before their eyes. After finalizing the last one, a few more questions were offered as your images were scanned and you handed over the sketch to Richard as you all stood again. You fought the urge to collapse caving in to your weak knees as your picture was captured at the side of his large frame, both with large smiles as you held up your art.

Moving through to the elevator again your hand raised your bag higher on your shoulder biting back your groan to force a smile as Travis’ hand stopped the metal doors from closing only to move aside allowing Richard and his Agent through. With both of them smiling at you in return unsure of what to say exactly until Richard asked, “So could I see more of your work?”

You met his gaze again nodding only managing to say, “Sure, if you’d like.”

Soon enough you’d swapped information with his Agent, at his insistence of course to handle the meetings between you for another day Richard would have a few hours free to stop in at your place to skim through your studio.

Though arriving at the impressive townhouse the pair of them eyed it curiously wondering how you could afford the incredible place. Climbing the steps the Agent’s finger hit the doorbell and they waited through a strange cymbal crashing behind the door making Richard chuckle before you appeared at the suddenly open door revealing you with your hair pooling out over your face as you quickly chuckled, “Sorry, Uncles dog, gets a bit excited at the bell.” Reaching up to brush your hair free stepping back to allow them inside to give another impressed glance around at the immaculately furnished house before facing you again, “Tea, coffee, I think I might have some juice here too somewhere?” Their smiles grew as you pulled your hair back in a bun forcing your baggy cardigan more suited to their frames than yours revealing the tank top and jeans with a few patches of paint across the thighs.

Richard’s eyes met yours saying, “Tea would be lovely. Thank you.” You nodded and glanced at the Agent as he said, “Same please.” Turning and leading them into the amazing kitchen causing Richard’s eyes to wander around as you collected the already whistling kettle as he said, “Your place is incredible.”

Smiling up at him again as you served the tea offering add ons as you sipped on your own, “Thank you. My Uncle’s actually, he’s in Switzerland, got an offer for Chief of Surgery and wanted someone to take over the rent and watch his dog.”

They smiled at you again before the Agent asked, “Does your art pay for all this?”

You giggled brushing your hair back from your face again, “Fan art, kind of. I also paint murals and illustrate for Children’s books. Not like Dr Seuss big but it’s steady work.”

They smiled again enjoying their tea through their brief roam over the ground floor to see the few of your pieces there before leaving your cups and going to the top floor. All white with solid deep wood floors with dozens of windows filling the room with light showing off all your scattered pieces. For nearly an hour they pointed out each one that drew their eye for a back story for it before the Agent’s phone buzzed for a call urging them back down again. Quietly lingering as the Agent went down first allowing Richard to ask, “I was wondering if we could meet up again.”

You nodded, “Sure, just um, ya have him call me for when you’re free.”

His eyes met yours after he leaned back to catch a glimpse at his Agent making sure he was still distracted on his phone as Richard drew his, “Actually I hoped we might try without him hovering about work, if you don’t mind that is.”

You smiled accepting his phone to punch your number in as you asked, “You sure he won’t snap at you for taking my number? He seemed so adamant about it.”

Richard chuckled softly giving you a bright smile, “Just wants to protect me.” His eyes lowered to his phone as his brows pressed together, “You saved it under Pear?”

You nodded, “Well it was either Miss Pear or Honey and I doubt you would want anyone to take the obvious use of that endearment seriously and start spreading rumors. Don’t think I haven’t noticed the pair of you avoiding saying it.”

Making him chuckle again, “It did seem a bit too familiar a nickname to use.”

“Well if you think of one use it, even if it’s something like Benjamin.” Making him chuckle again, “Just anything but Darling, please.”

His brow rose and he playfully asked, “And why wouldn’t that make the list?”

You giggled again, “Can’t help it’s a weakness for the accent, makes my knees buckle.” His smile grew as you continued, “That and Love, call me that I’ll swoon and I’m eternally yours.” Giggling wondering why you’d said that at all as he laughed smiling at you brightly. Watching as you started down the stairs and he followed after sliding his phone back in his pocket, but not before switching the title on your contact to Honey. Waiting for the first chance to see it pop up, eagerly planning his sneaking away from his Agent.

A few sneak away coffee house meetings later led to a stroll through a large library in the middle of downtown that drew a curious glance from Richard until you giggled saying, “Just wait you’ll see why we’re here.”

He smirked and followed after you taking his normal place at your side through the winding rows of books after a trip up a set of stairs before one last turn that drew a soft gasp from Richard eyeing the massive mural across the wall of the Children’s section with several characters from countless of the books available, “You asked about one of my murals, and the Children’s wing of the Hospital’s a bit harder to get in.” Making him chuckle as he moved closer to get a better look before leading you out to steal you away for a lunch realizing more and more he was not so subtly falling for you already doing all he could to spend as much time with you before he had to go overseas for another fan meet.

…

Stretched out along your stomach completing the detailed doodle of your next original series before glancing up from your spot on the couch after the large Saint Bernard jumping from your back and racing to the door with an excited tail wag to welcome the guest. Climbing over his back you opened the door bringing Richard into view holding his umbrella and a bag of take out asking through a slight pant, “Hungry?”

Smiling through a giggle you let him inside and with the door locking again your timid friendship grew through a deeply loving stolen kiss as he broke his own sentence on his travels, unable to hold back his wishful intentions for surprising you. Soon happily curled around you through the movie you’d picked for after the meal and again near your sink after adding your dishes there, gripping you firmly in his arms to softly ask by your ear, “How has your week been, Darling.”

His smile grew as he chuckled through your giggle, gently kissing your cheek while your hands ran along his arms filling him in on the few things you’d managed to get done before you were led back to the couch for more snuggling and stolen kisses.

...

Two years had nearly flown by revealing the not so sudden switch from Darling to Love that brought a smile to Richard’s face each time he caught the same lovable still unintentional yet slightly swooning reaction each and every time he used it pulling his heart just a bit closer to your full control each time he saw it. Partially moved in with you he was still inching his way towards that discussion, even though he did spend nearly most days with you, and nearly all nights after as well.

Though on his latest return yet again he found you stretched out along your stomach staring at a blank page when a weight was added to the bed behind you making you smile as he gently rested across your back kissing the backs of your shoulders before your cheek rumbling out, “What’s with that face Love?” Still holding his smile from seeing the adorable wrinkles between your brows and your reddened bottom lip from your focused biting.

Turning your head you ran your nose along his before pressing your lips to his, “Just stumped on this request.”

He chuckled softly resting his lips against your shoulder again after asking, “What’s this one on?”

You giggled softly laying your face against the blank page, “It’s supposed to be a unique one on you.”

“Unique how?”

You nodded, “Only specifications, just something that isn’t already all over the world.”

Chuckling softly he kissed your cheek again, “Need some inspiration then?”

You giggled softly feeling his hands on your hips, “And just what are you referring to as inspiration for me?”

He chuckled nearly purring against your ear, “Perhaps I could model for you, just this once.”

Giggling again you felt his grip tighten as he pulled you back towards the edge of the bed, turning you over and lifting you in his arms collecting your sketch pad and pencils, passing them to you and carrying you to the couch downstairs. Gently kissing you as he turned starting to remove his shirt and paused at you saying, “Normally I film my sketching remember?”

His eyes narrowed leaning in to kiss you again, “Just this once.” Pressing his lips to yours again as he helped you to your feet again, patting you on the butt playfully as you walked up to get your camera for the filming.

Returning down again only to find him stripped to his briefs flexing and stretching through various poses trying to find the best one making you laugh out loud bringing a smile to his face as he chuckled saying, “No laughing or I won’t be able to hold a pose. Now which one do you think is best?”

You giggled moving closer to him abandoning the camera on the couch to steal another kiss from him before helping his body find the best pose. Holding still for short intervals you promptly sketched his figure with basic details of his muscles fluidly forming the near Greek Statuesque pose to which you added armor and a sword while your camera remained fixed on the page. Pausing the filming on his breaks due to his breaking into chuckles and his obviously heated gazes as he rumbled, “I know that look Love.”

You smirked back eyeing his shoulders shifting as he took a sip of the drink he’d claimed in his latest break, “You’re mostly naked in front of me. Why wouldn’t I have a look?”

He chuckled again, “Camera off?”

You nodded and he moved closer giving the sketch a quick glance with an impressed smile purring into your ear, “Have I told you lately how incredibly talented you are?”

You giggled again kissing his nose, “Oh about every day.”

Chuckling again he eyed the sketch again, “Leaving my freckles for last?”

You shot him a playful glare, “They’re not being added.”

“You don’t like my freckles?”

Nudging his shoulder with yours you giggled as he chuckled, “I love your freckles. So much so in fact I refuse to let anyone else know about them. The movies cover them and I’m not sharing them.”

His lips found yours for another kiss moving the sketch pad from your lap lifting you in his arms, “Perhaps we should see just how many of my freckles won’t be going in the sketch.”

Sliding your arms around his neck you dropped your pencil on the couch saying, “There’s more than a few that certainly are in quite intimate locations.”

He smirked climbing the stairs, kissing along your neck purring, “And those would be?”

Another muffled chuckle came from him as one of your hands lowered to slide under his briefs pressing a fingertip gently against a spot on his groin you could find blindly, that drew a pulse from him, “This one first.”

Chuckling again bumps rose along his skin as your fingertips trailed around to his flexing butt cheek to press again, “You really memorized all of them?”

Chuckling again he laid you out on the bed settling out above you smiling at you lovingly as you curled your limbs around him as he stretched out, “Why wouldn’t I? You haven’t memorized anything on me?”

His smile grew, purring again as his hand traveled to your inner thigh making you giggle after he purred, “You do have this adorable little freckle, right here.” Before his lips trailed over your chest pausing at another on the top of one of your breasts, “And this one.” Each following mark on your body stripped you of another layer through your giggles.

…

Back down the stairs once again Richard curled up behind you with a blanket coating your legs as you finished the sketch and added a brief conclusion to the video before you gave it a brief edit after a few run throughs. Making sure it didn’t have anything to personal caught said between you two before posting it and the scan of the image before you set the sketch aside to mail it off in the morning as you grabbed Richard’s hand making his smile grow, “Tired Love?”

You simply shook your head with a smirk, “No, I forgot a freckle.”

Chuckling again he scooped you up and carried you back to your bed once more. “Maybe I could pose for you again sometime.”

You giggled again, “No cameras next time.”

“My thoughts exactly,” landing his lips on yours again.

#Richard Armitage x Reader OC

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