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#I'm gonna confront them about it and based on that I may or may not break up with them
mcwexlerscigarette · 6 months
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the person I'm dating invited me to their family's Christmas but now it's like four days away and they won't give me ANY details about it lol. like they actively avoid ANY questions whenever I ask. like... if you don't want me to go just say that. what's the point of fucking around
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totalswag · 5 months
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can i request rafe x fwb reader where reader finds out hes dating sofia and she goes to confront him that he didnt even have the decency to let her know their arrangement was over and he says "who said it was over?''
stuck in the middle - RAFE CAMERON
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authors note as you guys may notice i'm finally publishing requests that you guys sent me. super sorry this was very late to publish. i hope you like what i wrote and it was what you hoped. so, thank you for sending this requests.
requests are still open so feel free to send them my way and i will get to them and put them into my docs :) if you click on the bold red ink it will take you to my ask box lovies!!!
summary you find out through people and social media sofia and rafe are together. you go to confront rafe about this since he never thought to tell you that your arrangement was over.
warnings friends with benefits, mentions of sex, cursing
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Lately, you've been having this weird gut feeling in your stomach. No idea what the meaning behind it means but you want to find out what it could be. You started feeling this way whenever you were with Rafe on a random Wednesday.
Rafe and you have been friends with benefits for about three months now. When you two came to this agreement, you agreed that it was solely for your sexual pleasures and not to establish feelings for each other, and that the most important thing was to let each other know if one of you became serious with someone else so that the bargain could be broken off.
You overheard a rumor at a party this past Friday about Rafe and Sofia being together for a month. You couldn't believe your ears and wanted to vomit. Sofia works at the island's country club, and Rafe visits it from time to time.
The next day, you decided to do some research to be sure this was accurate. Even as you looked at her Instagram, the emotion returned. You checked her story highlights and discovered what you were looking for. Your stomach sank.
She had a couple pictures on her highlights that you knew were of Rafe, including one with his right hand on her thigh in his car and another with his back to her as he looks out into the distance. Based on what you discovered, they appeared serious.
What made you upset was the fact Rafe and you have been seeing each other for three months which meant he'd been with Sofia for who knows how long before he asked her to be his girlfriend.
"Why didn't he tell me?" You asked yourself, setting down your phone and running your hands through your hair, upset that you found out at random person at a party.
There's a part of you that doesn't want Rafe to be with Sofia. There's a part of you that wants him all to yourself. Regardless, he should've told you the arrangement was over.
That was the deal.
After thinking about what you should do, you decide you are confronting Rafe about this, tonight. You are gonna make it seem like you want to hookup but really you are telling him what you found out.
you- are you busy tonight? i wanna see you
rafe- funny you say that because i wanna see you too
rafe- meet me at the spot at 9pm.
"I'll be back in an hour or so," you tell your mom as you go past the living room, holding your keys. "I'm going to hang out with Samantha."
"That's fine, sweetie; please stay safe tonight, I love you," your mother adds, smiling.
When you get to the spot you see Rafe sitting in his car on his phone. You parked your car next to him so he knows it's you- when he sees you get out, he unlocks the car.
You sigh casually as you sit in the passenger seat.
Rafe says smiling "Hey pretty girl" in a tone that makes you weak in the knees, leaning over the center console to kiss you but you pull back.
"We need to have a little chat, Rafe," maintaining eye contact.
His smile fades, and he looks at you, puzzled, "What do you mean?" His response indicated that he was nervous or knew what was going to happen.
"Why didn't you tell me you and Sofia were together, Rafe? You never once said to my face, "Y/N, we can no longer meet up like this anymore because I have a girlfriend now," mimicking Rafe's voice, "we've been hooking up this entire time while you've been in this relationship that I had no idea about until I heard someone talking about it," you explain frustratedly in your voice and expressions.
In the midst of your rant towards him, he places his hand over his lips, chuckles, shakes his head, and looks down at his lap.
"Why the fuck are you laughing?" You ask, folding your arms, leaning back against the passenger door, annoyed.
He glances up from his lap, licks his bottom lip, and smirks: "Who said it was over?"
Before you could respond his lips were already on yours.
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usedpidemo · 25 days
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Update - 3rd year anniversary! (and some future plans, a reflection, etc.)
Hi everyone! π here.
By the time this post is up, it'll be the 13th of May. Three years since I began my writing journey and this Tumblr blog. Three years. Time flies by so fast. I was close to graduating senior high after it was delayed because pandemic, had my graduation in an empty room basically, now I'm hitting my third year of college. Crazy stuff.
With that said, here are the stats + timetable of the blog so far:
First work: Sandwich (Wendy) (published 05/13/21, 4:03 a.m)
Highest note count: Tell your friends (Yujin x Wonyoung) (published 01/14/23, 1274 notes)
Number of works published: 91 fics (1 fic every 12.03 days)
500 followers: June 18, 2021 (36 days)
1000 followers: October 12, 2021 (152 days)
2000 followers: June 18, 2022 (401 days)
3000 followers: November 12, 2022 (548 days)
4000 followers: May 22, 2023 (740 days)
5000 followers: December 18, 2023 (950 days)
Current follower count: 5615 (1 new follower every 5.12 days)
It's been a hectic final month of college, so I apologize for the lack of activity in recent times :< But summer is coming up very soon, so hopefully I'll have all the time in the world to write more till then! I will say, a new fic is on the near horizon, so please be on the lookout!
I would like to take the opportunity to thank every single of you, whether reader, lurker, or a fellow writer for your support! Especially during these lull times, your unwavering support has kept me afloat and has been a motivation in continuing to write. Love you guys as always. Here's to another fruitful year <3
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From this point, this part will be an overall reflection and life summary of the previous year, my thoughts on some personal matters, and some ideas I've been contemplating. If you don't wanna read this, you can stop here.
I miss 2023 quite a bit, not gonna lie. I know nostalgia can quickly grow warm and fuzzy, seeing the past through rose tinted lens, but I'll admit that 2024 hasn't been off to the start I envisioned it to be. That year was mostly peak for me, and I could even argue it's my favorite year to live out based on all my experiences. Traveling to new places, finally attending live events, interacting with my K-pop biases, and so on—it really felt like the best was yet to come with how 2023 flowed and transitioned into the new year.
Five months in, and I am struggling. Horribly. Most plans, dreams, and ideas have gone up in smoke, and it's just one devastating gut punch after another. I have a shitty professor in one major that basically made me check out of that class, and I don't know my family will react when I tell them I have to repeat said class because that professor was a dick. My family's been infighting on a daily basis, and I'm mostly collateral damage to them. Not one week can go by without some serious confrontation between them. There was a brief health scare with my mother, but that seems to be a nothing matter; thank God she'll be okay.
All this just makes life so deflating, in all honesty. I get that no life is without struggle, but I genuinely don't know when we'll be in the clear. Not anytime soon, I reckon. In these tough times, there's very little comfort except the past, when everything was pretty all right for the most part. It's been demotivating to write when mom comes forward with another grievance with my sister. It's hard to write when you have a professor who likes to power trip their students into submission. It's hard when you don't know how to admit to your mother that he failed his one class because of said power tripping professor.
But that doesn't mean I will let it eat me alive. I know we've been through some utter lows in the past. And we always get back up. If no one has us, then God does.
Summer break is fast approaching and I want to fix things. Even in my own little way. I know none of what I'm saying has anything to do with writing degenerate stories about hot K-pop idols, but real life circumstances have definitely affected me more than I can brush off. I should be calm, unfazed, undeterred.
After all, some stories are meant to be finished. They just take a more unconventional route. Ask Cody.
With all that being said, I will finish these commissions over the next two months. I'm really sorry to everyone who requested and paid for their stories months and months ago; I genuinely feel bad for not getting these out on time, but I am very mindful of quality control, and I have no one to blame but myself for being a slacker and lazy worker. Despite my feelings, I should remain professional—that's what being a worker means.
A lifestyle overhaul is definitely in my list of things to improve over the summer too. Figuring out how to get writing done, finding ways to alleviate my PokeRogue addiction (GOTY), whilst having a healthy work/life balance and not losing my sanity over it. Or worse, burning out.
And I want to take this opportunity to thank all my friends—peach, caps, majorblinks, chunk, frisky, raf, c.o, levi, sins, iz, ken, v1n, ddeun, notions, kevin, eros, brandon, kaede, svn, frisky, cray, rpg, prael—for putting up with my shit for another year. This life is tough, but you guys make it tolerable. Thank you for letting me air out my grievances even when it wasn't the best time to. I pray that when everything passes, I'm able to repay you all in some shape or form generously.
And to you, dear reader, for making it this far, thank you. Whether you've been with me since day one, or day 1094, as a commenter, reposter, liking, or just passing by/lurking, thank you for giving me a chance. Without you, all of this would have been for nothing. I don't know where I would be now if I didn't take that chance, that leap of faith back in 2021, and it's because of you I am able to keep doing this for the love of the game.
With grace,
Peter / π
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cod-dump · 10 months
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I come back with another TV series quote, Stranger Things addition. I've been seeing all these posts about how done Gaz is with Soap and Ghost, so I thought I'd contribute.
Ghost, driving to the rendezvous point: *Arguing with Soap* What are you gonna do, walk to the extraction point?
Soap: I will do anything if it gets me a way from you!
Gaz, very tired and very done with this bullshit: Children! Children! Children! This interminable bickering was amusing at first, but it's getting stale, and we've got a long drive ahead of us.
Gaz: So why don't you two cut the horseshit and get to the part where you admit your sexual feelings for one another.
Ghost, almost stearing into a ditch: Woah!
Soap: You are way off base, buddy!
Gaz: Oh, spare me, spare me, spare me! *Leans into the middle concel, looking at Soap*
Gaz: Yes, yes, hes a brute. I know. Probably reminds you of a bad relationship, and gosh, you'd really like a nice man to settle down with, but admit it, you're real curious to know what he's like I'm the sack!
Gaz, turning to Ghost: And you! Hah! Well, you're just a big man baby who'd rather act tough than show his true feelings because the last time you opened your heart, you got hurt. Owie.
Gaz: And now, rather than admit these feelings, you're dancing around one another with this mind-numbing and frankly borish mating ritual. So please, for my sake, either quit
Gaz: Or pull over, tear off those clothes, and get it over with!
Ghost and Soap: *Silence*
There was a period after all that was said that Gaz was sure that he was dead.
The silence was loud, suffocating. Nothing was said for several minutes and that gave Gaz plenty of time to think about what exactly he had said and to who. He’s known Ghost longer, he knows how he feels about being confronted with his emotions, his humanity. Gaz felt comfortable with Soap but he knew the man sometimes had a explosive temper. So the silence, the silence that would not exist if it was just one of the men instead of both, was very nerve racking.
The fact nothing was said the rest of the drive said far too much, that Gaz said too much.
They made it to the extraction point where Nik was waiting. Again, nothing was said that was strictly business on the flight back. It was obvious that Nik picked up on the tension and quickly figured it stemmed from Gaz. Man had always been observant so Gaz was hoping he could rely on him for protection if it came to that.
They made it back to base and thankfully Price was there, waiting for them in a professional yet relaxed pose. Silently, the three climbed out and Gaz hung back to avoid walking between the all too quiet Soap and Ghost. He felt Nik’s gaze on him and then Price’s, the man quickly picking up on whatever Nik and felt/seen. Fortunately the man didn’t say anything about it and just walked them inside to debrief.
Everything after that point would just be too quiet. Even with the regular chatter of the soldiers, everyone moving and working as normal, it was too fucking quiet. Soap and Ghost went their separate ways after the debriefing and just disappeared all together after that. Gaz was terrified to go to his office or room so he chose to stick next to Price.
“Sergeant… dare I ask what the hell happened on that mission?”
Gaz just sat silently next to him, eyes flickering to the door of the room, as if expecting someone to come barging in and attack him. That might’ve been Soap’s approach, Gaz has never seen Ghost go in guns blasting unless there was no other option.
“More like what happened afterward… I think they’re going to kill me.”
“Why would you think that?”
Price was definitely showing more interest in whatever was going on with Gaz over the paperwork before him. Man loved to hear gossip even though he would rather eat straight coffee grounds than admit it.
“May have overstepped with Soap and Ghost.”
Price was laser focused on him and it made Gaz shudder. He tried to avoid looking at his captain and just focus on the door completely. Gaz knew he couldn’t beat around the bush forever (Price would beat him if he did) so he just took a deep breath and told him everything. He explained their argument, what lead to it, and what Gaz had said to them on the car ride to the extraction point. Gaz took a breath after the final word, leaning over the table and closing his eyes to avoid looking or perceiving anything.
Price laughed loudly and Gaz just hunkered down more. Price tried to say something throughout his fit of uncontrollable laughing fit but was simply unable to get anything out. Price wasn’t the type to laugh at someone’s misery (though it has happened) so Gaz was hoping the situation was just too ridiculous and Gaz’s worry was purely irrational.
Finally, after Price laughing long and hard enough for him to be out of breath, the man calmed and pat Gaz’s shoulder.
“I wish I could’ve been there!”
“Cap-“
“You’re fine, Kyle. They’re not going to do shit.”
Gaz relaxed at Price’s certainty. Price was right, he was fine.
Gaz would stay fine until the next day early in the morning. He would be at breakfast in the mess, attempting to chase away the grogginess with coffee when he noticed someone sit at the table he was at.
“Hey, Gaz. How’d you sleep?”
Gaz was surprised to hear it was Soap, “Fine. You losing your voice, mate? Sound like- OH MY GOD-“
Gaz had opened his eyes to see Soap and the absolute murder scene that was his neck. It looked like someone strangled him then bit him to hell and back. Gaz gawked, Soap avoiding looking him in the eye like he was Medusa. Gaz struggled to say something, anything.
“What the fuck happened to you?!”
Soap was red in the face, turning his upper body away from Gaz. Gaz was going to push more but then Soap muttered, face practically on fire.
“Had a… ‘talk’ with Ghost about our feelings yesterday.”
Gaz gasped louder than what others would’ve deemed necessary, but to him it was very necessary. Soap decided to leave quickly, Gaz just staring after him with his jaw hanging open. Soap disappeared out of the mess and Gaz didn’t know what to do other than grab his phone and immediately text Price what he had just learned and seen.
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shakingparadigm · 2 months
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What if Luka expects Hyuna to come like she did in his round with Mizi and he is plotting something.He has the trust of aliens,the love of the public and no one would suspect him to do something outside the box,far from the image he created of himself.Hyuna made her appearence in round 5 when we didn't expected it. If the round isn't entirely dedicated to Ivan and Till,this may be an option.He may confront Mizi and Hyuna,they may not be able to rescue Ivan and Till and not make it in time. Luka may not appear at all.
(Me overthinking things: OMG Akugetsu will cover Hyuna's song this must mean something | The other me: OMG I can't wait,this song literally suits him!)
(I like the style of your drawings,the way you use colors and the way you phrase things! When something about ALNST comes out I just wait for your updates! I can't imagine what will happen on tumblr when round 6 is out. And then all of us will wait for the next one over again XD)
Till the end.
TILL... the end...
Ok this is the worst joke I could ever make.
Oohh. Luka appearing in ROUND 6 would honestly be insane. I thought about him making an appearance in the short teaser scene before credits, but if he actually confronted anyone himself that would be so interesting. Imagine all 6 of them in the same episode... the same room... no way... the Alien Stage would be real...
Luka attempting to sabotage Mizi and Hyuna is such an intriguing concept. I do think he's figured out that Hyuna will be returning, he grew up with her, after all. He's most likely aware of her penchant for protecting people. He probably expects Mizi to come back for the only friends she has left, too. He couldn't do anything the first time he saw Hyuna after ROUND 5, but he might be more eager to get his hands on her now. If we get our first adult Hyuna and Luka interaction during ROUND 6 I'd actually go insane. as much as I hope for it though, I'm not sure whether or not it will actually happen. ROUND 6 already has a lot going for it. A final confession of love already makes for a heavy episode, but with Till's newly revealed backstory added to the mix? Mizi and Hyuna's attempt at a jailbreak? The whole video would probably need an entire week to be processed and even comprehended, especially if they want to go into extensive detail on each aspect. Still, though, if Luka interfered... if Mizi and Hyuna were unable to save anyone and had to defeatedly return to the rebellion base carrying the weight of their failure, well, I DON'T THINK I'D BE REACHABLE FOR AT LEAST 10 BUSINESS DAYS I'd have to go into hiding in order to cope with that. But who knows! The fun part about VIVINOS videos is that they're always gonna leave you fucked up in one way or another!
AKUGETSU COVERING ALL-IN. TILL COVERING HYUNA'S SONG. I've posted so many times about this day holy shit its finally real. It really does suit him! Do you think AKUGETSU is
1) hinting that Till is joining the rebellion
or
2) giving us the All-In cover as compensation for whatever bad thing is going to happen to Till
(or a secret third thing: he literally just did it for fun and we've just gone insane.)
Ahh thank you so much for enjoying my stuff! I'm so happy, everyone's been really nice to me as of late and I don't know what to doooo hahaha I'm just really glad to share everyone's excitement for ALIEN STAGE :)
You wait for my updates??!! oh no I'm so sorry 😭 I'm quite late at times because I've had some stuff going on (I've barely said anything about the April Fools actor au 😭) but hopefully I'll be free to go absolutely nuts after the release of ROUND 6 tomorrow!! If you're ever in need of someone to scream about ROUND 6 with my inbox is always open!! Thank you for your kind words!!
Can't wait till I get to hear from you again! :)
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iamfitzwilliamdarcy · 3 months
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ok this one IS an explicitly anti-maiko post, I'm not sorry. The Beach is a great episode except that a lot of it doesn't actually land for me in terms of relationship dynamics, and the extremely obvious one is maiko.
This episode does a lot of work for trying to establish the Fire Nation kids group dynamics and their motivations and insecurities. It's really good, especially for Azula. It also is where Zuko first starts confronting returning to the Fire Nation was not going how he expected and his growing internal conflict. But background to this is also further establishing the Zuko/Mai relationship, and lemme just say-- I do not think the writers do a good job.
This got long esp because of transcript quotes, so I put it under a read more, but here we go
Throughout the episode, Zuko and Mai snipe at each other, culminating in a blowup argument and a breakup. And then they literally just kiss and make up at the end of the episode, without doing anything to fix the things that led to the break up in the first place.
So let's start with the argument, work backwards from there, and back to their resolution. This is the argument:
Mai [Angrily.] Zuko, what is wrong with you? Zuko What's wrong with me? Mai [Scolding.] Your temper is out of control. You blow up over every little thing. You're so impatient and hotheaded and angry! Zuko [Snapping back.] Well, at least I feel something, as opposed to you. [Frontal view from behind Mai.] You have no passion for anything! You're just a big blah! Mai [Turns away from Zuko.] It's over, Zuko. We're done.
Immediately preceding this, Zuko shoves the Fire Nation kid talking to Mai at the party. Zuko's been jealous of him all episode and it's frankly not entirely unfounded. Chan invites Ty Lee to his party, Ruon-Jian notices Mai and invites her too-- Zuko is ignored until Azula insists on getting them both invites as well. Zuko's jealousy is out of line, and getting suspicious Mai likes Ruon-Jian is too, I can see why Mai would be annoyed by that. I can also see why it would trigger Zuko getting so upset when he sees Ruon-Jian talking to her at the party.
I... have trouble believing Mai would actually be so mad/upset that Zuko shoved another guy. It's a little controlling, but it is exciting and she had just been saying she as bored. It would make more sense to me if Zuko had taken this out on her -- she can't talk to people, etc-- as a reason for being upset-- because that would go better with her personal family trauma revealed later in the episode about being controlled and stifled.
I also think it's interesting Mai says Zuko's temper is out of control because other then going after Ruon-Jian, he's not really angry in this episode? He's annoyed about being handled by his father, he's dismissive of Mai's negativity at the party, he is suspicious and jealous but he doesn't do anything outright and hot tempered until then. What is Mai basing this on?
(after this Zuko IS very mean to Ty Lee at the fireside but we have no in show evidence he was before)
We certainly address Zuko's anger later at the fireside-- he's in conflict with himself, he is angry at himself. They sort of address Mai not feeling things and being a big blah in the fireside scene -- I'm gonna put the long block quote here lol:
Zuko [Camera pans right. Getting up.] Yeah, you do not believe in anything. Mai [Close-up; sarcastically.] Oh, well, I'm sorry I can't be as high-strung and crazy as the rest of you. Zuko [Aerial view of campsite. Walking up to the campfire.] I'm sorry, too. I wish you would be high-strung and crazy for once instead of keeping all your feeling bottled up inside. [Frontal view.] She just called your aura dingy. Are you gonna take that? Mai [Aerial view of campsite. Leaning back.] What do you want from me? You want a teary confession about how hard my childhood was? Well, it wasn't. [Close-up.] I was a rich only child who got anything I wanted ... as long as I behaved [Cut to shot of the sky.] and sat still, and didn't speak unless spoken to. [Close-up of Zuko.] My mother said I had to keep out of trouble. We had my dad's political career to think about. Azula [Side-view of campsite.] Well, that's it, then. [Close-up.] You have a controlling mother who had certain expectations, and if you strayed from them, you were shut down. That's why you're afraid to care about anything, and why you can't express yourself. Mai [Frontal view.] You want me to express myself? [Stands up and yells.] Leave me alone! Zuko [Side-view of campsite. Frontal view of Zuko.] I like it when you express yourself. [Approaching, attempting to put a hand on her shoulder.] Mai [Frontal view.] Don't touch me! I'm still mad at you. [She sits.] Zuko [Side-view of Mai.] My life hasn't been that easy either, Mai. Mai: Whatever. That doesn't excuse the way you've been acting.
Anyway, again, "the way Zuko's been acting" isn't really obvious to me-- he's a little snide after their fight and that's mean. And even here, Zuko is (I think fairly earnestly) trying to give her an outlet and she's not moved by it. It's not until he confesses he's angry at himself that she seems to forgive him, and it's unclear exactly what has moved her about this --
Zuko [Close-up.] Because I'm confused. Because I'm not sure I know the difference between right and wrong anymore. Azula You're pathetic. Mai [View from behind Zuko.] I know one thing I care about. [Walks up to Zuko. Frontal view.] I care about you. [They kiss.]
Press X to doubt because the whole episode has not shown once that Mai cares about Zuko. In fact, it's shown her rebuffing all his attempts to connect with her and the arguing with him. The episode hasn't shown me one piece of evidence that Mai even likes Zuko. There's nothing that's changed between the start of the episode and now, except that Zuko's addressed why he's angry and who he's angry with-- but it doesn't explain why that would make Mai not mad at him anymore. They haven't addressed any of their earlier grievances, but once again the writers use a kiss to show us everything's all made up and fine now, I guess. A kiss isn't a resolution, but I mentioned in another post, Book 3 does this a lot!
Also it's weird to me to just ignore Zuko expressing his conflict-- Mai has no opinion about that? This becomes a point of conflict a bit later in The Boiling Rock episodes, where Mai tells Zuko he is betraying his country, but again it's never really satisfactorily addressed. Azula at least calls him pathetic -- which isn't nice but isn't ignoring it either.
I would even go as far to say Ty Lee is shown to care more about Zuko when she calls him out for burning the family portrait and it's Ty Lee who says "I know you." That line just really hits me as very meaningful, but they opted not to give it to Zuko's girlfriend, not even to his sister, but to Ty Lee.
SO that is all to say-- if this is supposed to be a Maiko episode, it doesn't land. All it does is lay seeds for their dysfunction and conflict, then refuses to resolve it.
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total-drama-brainrot · 2 months
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Island Assistant Noah AU, where Noah got himself eliminated on purpose, but Chris + Chef somehow figure it out... The day after Noah's elimination, everyone is surprised to see that Noah's back... Chris reveals that inside the contestants' contracts: "Anyone who gets eliminated on purpose, will become Chris Mcclean's Assistant."... And Noah has to be decent at his job, or he won't get paid... Noah stays Chris' Assistant all throughout Island, Action and World Tour! 🌎 (I'm sorry if I'm asking this twice; I don't remember asking this!)
OKAY!! SO!!
You did already ask me this and I did have an answer in the works to the original ask, but because Tumblr's mobile app is my number one enemy, I accidentally posted it. So, really, it's super fortunate that you asked this twice!
But! Because I'm a smart cookie, I took some screenshots of what I had typed out in the original post, so I can just re-type it out here and carry on! (I'd post just the screenshots, but they're full of typos because I'm just awful at typing on a phone.)
So, here's my answer:
Yes!! Give me a Noah who thought he was being so sneaky and cunning by intentionally getting himself eliminated, only for it to backfire horrendously!
The producers would've known that the contestants were being sent to Camp Wawanakwa instead of the resort their contract heavily implied they'd be going to, so they would absolutely anticipate at least one of them trying to pull a stunt like Getting Themselves Eliminated Intentionally- either as an act of defiance against the trickery (of Camp Wawanakwa not being what was advertised) or just to be spiteful.
Noah being the one to do so is just happenstance.
(It was more so expected from the likes of Duncan or Izzy, who are outwardly anti-authoritarian and not afraid to confront perceived injustices.)
If I may, I'd suggest having the contract outline that whoever intentionally gets themself eliminated has to work as a base-level intern, and that their "pay" is them working off whatever expenses the show invested into them as a competitor (travel costs, lodging, food, ect.). So Noah ends up stuck in the role of an unpaid intern for however long it takes him to "earn his keep" so to speak. But it's a Sisyphean task, since his debt is ever growing- he's forced to stay at Playa des Losers as an intern, and his daily cost of living is just added to the expenses he needs to work off.
At first, he'd be outright resistant to doing any of his tasks as an intern, because why should he? He didn't ask for the job, he didn't (knowingly) sign up for it either, and it's not like he's gonna be paid for his work. That is, until the producers threaten to pass his debt off to the rest of his family to "pick up his slack"; Noah's not heartless, and he cares a lot about his family, so he concedes to actually doing the work expected of him to save the rest of his brood from having to compensate for his short-sightedness.
(Let's say this turn of event takes about a week, meaning that from the time of his own elimination to the threat to his family's financial wellbeing, only Justin and Katie have been eliminated. Since, at least during Island, it's established that a challenge and subsequent elimination ceremony happens every three days.)
Now, the thing about lazy people- of which Noah undoubtedly is- is that they're downright innovative when it comes to figuring out shortcuts for any type of labour. Now that he's invested in doing his job, Noah uses that big brain of his to quickly figure out how to get all of his allotted tasks for the day completed to near-perfection, in a manner that's both efficient and easy. It gets to the point where he's completing a full day's work in an hour, spending the rest of the day doing what he loves; nothing. The other interns are just as annoyed as they are impressed.
Word quickly gets back to Chris about his miracle intern. But he's either too preoccupied to actually listen to who it is, or no one thinks to explain that his most productive labourer is the ex-competitor he'd contractually conned into the position.
Needless to say, Chris' interest is piqued.
The host issues a request to have the mystery intern shipped out to the island so they can work on the "important stuff" instead of doing menial tasks on the Playa, and is met with staunch refusal on their part. Which is odd, at least to Chris, since the interns send to be far too scared shitless of him (or, more notably, Chef) to ever outright deny a request like that.
It makes more sense when Noah's literally dragged kicking and screaming back to the island. Of course the only person ballsy enough to defy Chris' whims is the same contestant who got himself intentionally eliminated via deliberately pissing off his teammates. But he's back, now, so he might as well be put straight to work! No use in wasting labour, after all.
(Again, this probably happens over the course of a few days at most, since showbusiness is such a hectic and fast-paced line of work, so let's say that Tyler's the only new elimination in this timeframe.)
Again, Noah utilizes his higher-than-average smarts to figure out how to streamline his expected tasks because he's lazy, inadvertently proving himself as a Valuable Asset to both Chris and Chef since he's surprisingly good at what he does (even if what he does is very little by design). Chris is quick to offer Noah an ultimatum; he can either be promoted to being Chris' Personal Assistant, thus meeting the demands of his previous contract (and, of course, entering a new one under different pretences) and finally being paid for his work, or remain as an unpaid intern indefinitely and receive penalisation for his slacking off- since, despite the fact that he's gotten all of his work finished, he's still technically on the clock for the allotted work hours and should be acting as such instead of lazing about.
It's not really much of a choice. Noah reluctantly takes the promotion.
That's how he finds himself in the position we all know and love; Chris' Personal Assistant.
Because of his new promotion, he's expected to be at least within the vicinity of Chris at all (reasonable) times. The problem with that? Chris is hosting the show he got himself eliminated from in the most socially destructive way possible. Noah's now contractually forced to, at the very least, tiptoe around the prior teammates he knowingly and intentionally made hate him and dearly hope they don't notice him.
...Thus begins an AU's worth of shenanigans wherein Noah is desperately trying to fly under everyone's radar as an intern.
(I'd carry on into what he does during Action and World Tour, but this post is already fairly long, so maybe another time?)
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probablyhuntersmom · 5 months
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Restless, Desperate Hunter: A (Sort of) Repeat of Eclipse Lake
I wrote this to add to my headcanon that Hunter would, over time, desperately try to distract from his grief when everyone first starts rebuilding The Boiling Isles. This would be happening again and again till he's too tired - and too confronted by others - to continue doing it.
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We can take a closer look at Luz's behaviour in Reaching Out for a bunch of clues:
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Luz's phone alarm kept reminding her that she had to pick flowers for her dad's grave. As the phone alarm sounded again and again throughout the episode, she became more desperate to focus on other people's problems in order to push her own problems aside and out of mind.
She crossed over the boundaries of other people, not getting their consent first and jumping straight to helping them:
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Eda confronts her about it:
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And the string of events led to her lying to Amity towards the final part of the episode.
Look at how relieved Luz is when Amity even says "...I have a problem, and it could distract us all day". Luz would want nothing more than a dragged out, lasting distraction:
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The biggest signs and indications show up in the second half of the episode, when we hear her inner voice here:
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and here:
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Which is an ultra therapy-related thing. When someone is unable to sit alone with unpleasant thoughts and emotions, they'll need a therapist and/or loved ones to accompany them and do that. If they don't, they may turn to any distraction - overwork, blaming others, violence, alcoholism and substance use, working out at the gym, and many more - to block it out via cycles of addiction.
Hunter placing all of his focus on physical sensations and external stimuli instead of inner emotions and sensations - patrolling and watching out for threats below - is a small-scale example of such distractions:
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Some people go for years or decades of such blocking out, because it becomes their comfort zone. The pain of loss can be so great that absolutely anything can be used to be a Band-Aid or salve to make one (temporarily) forget that a huge gaping wound is there.
We have seen that this boi's main focus is:
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being useful. But it's gonna cause tension in his relationships if he places more importance on that than anything else. The #1 family rule based on how Belos raised him was to be of use, or else be cast out. His healing journey was basically about switching to a new, far less extreme rule. The new main rule would probably be something like needing to trust that he will always find his place in a loving family and community.
(Read here for an explanation about the concept of "family rules" in counselling psychology)
For a very long time, it was normalized for him to enforce the will of Belos:
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And some old habits from his Golden Guard days would die hard. But after Belos's death, enforcement and fear need to be in the past, and instead make way for true connection and love.
Irritability would be something he wrestles with too, in the many months after he loses Flapjack.
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The Abomaton's alarm definitely reminded Luz here of her phone alarm. When you see Luz being genuinely angry, you know that something's up :O
Seen this before? I think so:
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So, I'm pretty sure the poor bean's going to be confronted with a bunch of questions and comments like "What is up with you today?"/"You've been acting weird"/"There's something you're not telling us" from close friends and family.
And...he's gonna have a short fuse at times...as he gets more in touch with anger, not just sadness. I have a feeling that the Hexsquad's palismen might be the main trigger for such anger, since that arguably links the most directly to Flapjack's demise. But other triggers like reminders of the Emperor's Coven, would be lurking all over the place T_T Such episodes of Hunter's frustration and outbursts may happen during lessons with Dell, in the Hexside classrooms, Camila's house, Darius's house, investigating places ravaged by Belos's regime, etc.
But once he has processed more of the pain, increment by increment, he'd take a look at it. Perhaps it would take a number of visits to help human realm animals at Camila's clinic, maybe even side projects such as woodworking and more sewing to build and craft inanimate objects (basically healthy exposure therapy, while he tries to work on actual palismen).
It would become less difficult to give honest answers when people ask him what's wrong: instead of him worrying too much about inconveniencing them, worrying about the consequences of revealing what's really going on, or desperately scrambling to keep his pain at bay
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and...
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..he would eventually make plans with his found family to put up Flapjack's headstone. Something tells me that he built and crafted it with his own hands. By then, his heart was ready to do so.
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kaylinalexanderbooks · 2 months
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Happy STS!
Last question before bed and in keeping with that, what sort of bedtime rituals do your OCs have?
Thanks for stopping by! Happy STS!
20 minutes of STS left I can do this.
What's funny is that I rarely write scenes of characters going to bed, so I'm gonna improvise based on Vibes.
Lexi's whole thing is being comfortable and caring for others. She'd probably snuggle in a blanket with hot cocoa or something to wind down from the day, maybe call or text her friends until it gets late enough for bed. She'd have an exact time to go to bed, though, so she can get a decent amount of sleep.
Maddie would probably lose track of time and just stay up too late building LEGOs or something. Maybe cramming on a school project she forgot about. Just try to keep herself entertained and do the stuff she couldn't do for fun during the day. Pure pleasure.
Ash would be similar with the cramming for a project she forgot about and keeping herself entertained. During the plot of the first book and beyond, fixating on the telepathic probes she found and later in the series the actual sessions with them to get visions as a pleasure trip.
Gwen would read for sure. To wind down, but she'd get invested and lose track of time. Snuggle into a comfy corner of her room with a nice book and the overhead lights off with string lights being her source, wrapped in an oversized robe.
Robbie doesn't have a routine. He'd stay up doing who knows what - talking to people, binging YouTube, reading a Wikipedia article, etc. And then he'd be like "one more thing before bed" and then it's 1:14 out of nowhere and he has school at 7. So tired at this point that he collapses.
Akash is the kind of person who can have caffeine right before bed and still go to sleep. Would chat with his friends, have a timer for bedtime, may put on some music or ambient noise.
Jedi is like Gwen only his idea for getting comfy while reading is sitting at his desk reading science journals.
Carmen has a plan. Step 1: get tired. Step 2: go to sleep. Any direct way to get tired is good for her. If she didn't have to confront her emotions when she consumed alcohol she'd gladly have a cocktail. But she does, so probably a sleepy tea. I'm torn between her being the kind of person who understands you need eight hours of sleep but at the same time is like "I need to get all of this done today because I planned it to get done today BUT IT DIDN'T GO ACCORDING TO PLAN and instead of doing it in the morning I need to do it NOW" and then taking a drug to sleep. Injects melatonin directly into the bloodstream. I'm feeling she does the former most of the time but whenever she's in the place of not getting enough done she would do that.
One minute to spare, yes!!
This was fun! I thought I'd have nothing.
TSP intro
TSP tag list (ask to be +/-): @thepeculiarbird @illarian-rambling @televisionjester @finchwrites
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cyanityinsanity101 · 9 months
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going on a tangent about why i think the mfn puppets are victims of toxic positivity as someone who's experienced it!
[ quick warning, i'm gonna go into mental health stuff and mentions of sh at the end ]
ok, so like looking at the stuff all the puppets do just screams to me that these puppets are definitely victims of some sort of toxic positivity. gonna just ramble about them cuz i can't keep this in my head- [ all of these examples are based on stuff i've experienced before, so it may not be definitive proof but it's just what i think ]
1.the puppets are constantly happy even when talking about stuff that would probably traumatize any normal person
listen, no normal person would just casually mention how they stomped their friend's face in or made a lump out of the remains of their friend. the way they talk about it feels like the way someone would talk about a traumatizing event without realizing it's traumatizing. the only thing i can think of is that the people who worked with the puppets definitely must have done something that made them not realize stuff so bad was so traumatizing. [ example, they weren't allowed to watch TV until they were alone, the people at the studio definitely were making sure these puppets wouldn't realize happy wasn't a default emotion. ]
2.they switch back to being happy as soon as they even show a hint of negative emotion
this one is just extremely relatable to me, i've just instantly hid my negative emotions whenever i accidentally show them so i was able to see this right away, and when the puppets do show negative emotions it's more extreme like they're just starting to get out pent up negativity. speaking as someone who's experienced it, this is extremely accurate to what can often happen when you hide negative emotions.
3.When they are confronted with negative emotions, they seem to not react well if the unfriendly neighbors are anything to go by
yeah this one's very obvious, the second they were able to watch tv and saw how negative everything was, basically in ricky's own words, it felt like they were dying. and considering what the unfriendly neighbors look like, it's clear they even resorted to self-harm to some capacity when they couldn't handle the fact that happiness wasn't just something everyone experienced. speaking as someone who's had this revelation a long time ago, it does feel like your dying when you realize what you experienced wasn't normal, and even the self-mutilation is sadly accurate.
so when gordon comes along, it doesn't really just feel like it's them teaching gordon that not everything's all sad and gloomy, it also feels like it's gordon teaching them that experiencing negative emotions isn't something to hide [ heck his talk with gobblette fuels this idea as he's actually comforting gobblette while she feels sad. ] although this is just my interpretation, it's just an interpretation i really like.
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silviakundera · 3 months
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In Blossom episode 3 & 4 reaction:
The moment FL is confronted with her own dead body 👏 👏
Then a nice murdery dream sequence. Now we're finally cooking!
Though I'm annoyed that FL is being foolish enough to openly declare she's not this noble lady. Snap out of it and try to LIVE, girl! She had enough survival instinct to make it out of a family massacre and rebuild her life as a coroner assistant. So I expect some resilience & ingenuity.
I got no objection to her considering Pan Yue the prime suspect, though. She's not wrong that he's got a reasonable motive & opportunity. Yeah, he was a sweet kid when she knew him but people change, especially when gaining power and status. It's a logical supposition.
I wonder if body snatcher's brother is evil? 🤔
Unexpectedly liked the scene where FL declares that she'll get justice for murdered body snatcher. Obviously the woman doesn't deserve it but I can vibe with the idea of FL feeling 'she paid for wickness with death' ; FL may have wanted revenge but never was gonna take it that far. and she feels a special horror at the idea of a bride being killed by her groom. The idea of getting justice on her behalf allows her to psychologically make peace with taking over another person's body & status.
Also liked that she immediately hooks up with her bestie, so she isn't totally isolated. That's the ingenuity I expected!
the blood declarations made me lol
I really enjoy the FL when she's a scheming hater and I enjoy him more with his dark side setting ON.
Episode 4
I'm just covering my ears & eyes and going la la la la to suspend my disbelief about how the noble miss is allowed to live in the magistrate HQ, observe, and cane officers. It's all ridiculous but whatever. That strange idol drama logic where period typical sexism both exists and does not exist, based on plot convenience.
So Heyang is super corrupt. ML and FL will have a lot of clean up to distract them from trying to murder each other.
I like that Pan Yue continues to appear reasonably suspicious (i.e. took the case file on FL's murder, appears to accept bribes), so our protagonist isn't foolish to distrust him.
On the other hand, I was looking for this drama to be darker with less wacky hijinks. Well, it's a cdrama so the tone could still flip.🤞
Enjoying the dueling, aha I have evidence you might have been at the murder scene vs oh no he might think I was a witness at the murder scene!
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vote-gaara · 7 months
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I wonder about Gaara being strategically genius????? What do you think? 🤔
Oh, he absolutely is!
I think he would be hard pressed not to be due to how observant he is....A good portion of his victories - strategies aside - have been due to him simply observing, remembering and utilizing a small detail of his opponent.
For example:
During the chunin exams, when Gaara switched himself with a sand clone in his fight against Lee.
During his fight with Kimimaru, Gaara noticed that his opponent was clearly dying from some form of illness and kind just ran the clock out on him. This may not be that apparent at first glance, but Gaara and Kimimaru did this "rock, paper, scissors" match over who had the strongest structure. Which, when I first saw that, I was like "THIS IS SO STUPID" like why does Kimimaru not simply run around Shukaku's shield???? Why is Gaara not going on the offensive?! Yeah...That was cause it was a pissing match. Gaara knew Kimimaru was a goner so he just was wasting time....(Also apparent cause Gaara just sunk him down to hell. Didn't even kill him, he was just like "down you go.")
When Gaara confronted Sasuke at the Kage summit, he noticed that Sasuke's defense was nearly impenetrable, but that there was hope in getting through it by attacking at the user's feet (later during his fight with Madara, Gaara mentions this).
Against the 2nd Mizukage, Gaara quickly figured out how to slow down and then stop that imp thing by noticing the stages the imp went through during attack cycles.
When fighting against Madara (after Tsunade revived him and he was able to join the real Naruto on the final battlefield) Gaara just like....Inserted sand into Madara's body and started to control him like some kinda morbid puppet. Which isn't really a strategy that's really that smart when you look at it, but more of a "hail mary, I'm gonna see if I can pull this off" type thing. Cause really, you CANNOT TELL ME that Gaara had ever tried that before in any other battle but that one. Clearly Gaara was grasping at straws and just trying anything at that point, which is why it's going on this list, because the boy is innovative. He's always figuring out new ways to use his sand when catch and crush just ain't cutting it.
So yeah, I think he is a pretty big genius in the strategy department simply based on his god-like observation abilities.
And in fact, most of the time he loses his battles it's because he wasn't in a position to be as observant as he normally would've been. Say for example, during the Chunin exams when he fights both Sasuke and Naruto, he's just lashing out and not really taking the battle seriously. Then again in his battle with Deidara, Gaara tried to size up his opponent but ultimately lost because; one, he was outwitted (poor Gaara) and two, he was distracted by protecting his village.
Even in his fight against Madara along with the other Kage, Gaara shows exceptional attention to detail DESPITE LITERALLY FIGHTING FOR LIKE 24 HOURS AT THAT POINT; he notices and protects Mei from getting the full attack from Madara's clones before ultimately getting blasted off into the stratosphere himself, where he lands next to Mei and they have a lovely, light, brunch conversation about how fucked thems truly are (obviously I'm being facetious but still really funny the little aside they both had and Madara's clones don't even take advantage of them in that moment, they just see Gaa and Mei are having this lil convo and they're like "yeah, that's allowed").
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rriavian · 8 months
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Why a Vortex? - The Corinthian in 1x10
This was intended to continue my last post about the Corinthian being smart about how he handled the fight with Dream but it got derailed so. Yeah. Still writing part 2. I'm gonna have to reorganise my blog to make things easier to find. As always this is show based because while I know comic spoilers I haven't read them yet. Is this also technically part 1 of a series of posts discussing the final convention confrontation?
Erm. I’ve already had to shift the theme of this so it might be.
I’m focusing on the plan to use Rose to fight Dream because I’ve always thought the plan itself was more than a little stupid. It might be because we never really understand enough about what a dream vortex is (which yeah I have thoughts about), but the whole ‘replace Morpheus as the heart of the dreaming’ always felt like an assumption rather than a truth. Rose can pull down barriers between dreams and, when taught to, restore them but she can’t control the dreams themselves. She can’t replace Dream. It's made very clear that her powers would destroy her too, eventually, alongside everything else.
This is a bit of an aside from the main point but, while I think the existence of a vortex is a massively unfair and sadistic phenomenon, I do think it serves to show what Dream is quite nicely. He’s not only managing the incredible amounts of information in the subconscious but he’s keeping it separate. Distinct. Preserving individuality.
He allows privacy.
You can yearn in peace, fear in peace, not alone but…protected. The most innermost self is allowed to remain hidden. But the vortex strips that away. It’s an invasion, a deconstruction.
But back to the main point.
So the Corinthian may (in my opinion) have a stupid plan. But it’s indicative of his own perspective and interpretation of Dream and links directly to why he’s rebelling in the first place. I don’t actually think he entirely believed that Rose could replace Dream. I think he thought she could wound him, maybe even kill him, but not become him. The Corinthian’s final taunt about being regretful he won’t be around to watch Rose destroy Dream is—interesting to me, because I never believed she really could, and I think even for the Corinthian it’s a lovely fantasy that he’s enjoying.
He wants Rose to force Dream to feel how he feels.
The Corinthian wants to set Dream up against his own terrifyingly powerful opponent. His own inescapable threat. He wants Dream to try and fight someone who’s already decided they’re against him and will not be swayed. Which is also interesting because it’s concentrating on the result, allows for an interpretation to go either way, compatible with both positioning Dream as wrong, or Dream as right. If Rose is right to destroy Dream then it suggests the Corinthian does understand why he’s being uncreated. But if Rose is wrong to do it, just as Dream is wrong to do it, then perhaps he wants Dream to understand that through the threat of a vortex.
Either way it’s an attempted lesson.
An attempted nightmare - at giving Dream one of his very own, to prey upon something the Corinthian thinks needs fixing in his creator. Arguably a nightmare that started the moment he decided to ensure Dream would remain trapped by Burgess for a significant length of time.
For all he told Lucienne she would be unable to change Dream, the Corinthian is still seemingly acting to argue his own case.
Perhaps deciding whether uncreation is right or wrong in the traditional sense isn’t the point at all. Or not the whole point. In the context of the rest of the exchange at the convention the Corinthian's original intent might have been a mix of critiquing Dream's reasoning as well as his chosen method of punishment. The core of that might be that it’s not actually about the morality of the decision (that’s a conundrum for the one making the choice) but more the feeling of the one being acted upon. To me, his point is more 'your reasons make sense to you but your actions in response to them are still wrong' and I've got a 100 year long thesis on why I am actually still performing my function perfectly.
Here is my presentation on my conclusions so glad you can attend.
But Dream's response, while giving more of an explanation as to why those conclusions are wrong, essentially is 'yeah no you haven't proven what you think you have, you may have actually proven you're worse, and I'm still going to uncreate you'
So the Corinthian is like fine.
Here's my back up thesis have fun dealing with a vortex.
So then we get the 'I'm only sorry that I won't be around to watch Rose do the same to you' line.
You could say that when the Corinthan's attempt at demonstrating why he's right doesn't work he closes the attempt at a dialogue entirely. The nightmare/lesson he's set up will still come to pass though. Last words are important, and these are the one's the Corinthian chooses. He’s making his rejection clear by supporting Rose, but also still wants Dream to understand him, chooses words that allow him both. Even if his creator still doesn't understand his position, the Corinthian has found someone else who is going to make him understand it.
In the end he at least wants Dream to see that whether right or wrong it's a position of complete powerlessness.
No agency, no recourse to alter one's fate; it’s uncreation, it’s complete destruction, and that’s what really matters about it. The Corinthian wants Dream to really feel that. To feel something other than what he sees as ‘just another Tuesday as the ruler of the Dreaming’ because to the Corinthian that final moment is everything. Right or wrong it’s wiping away all that he is. The last line is his way of being like 'see how you like it'.
It’s ‘you destroyed me’.
It’s ‘You destroyed me and I wish I could stick around long enough to finally watch you understand the desperation of what that feels like’.
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the-6th-harbringer · 7 months
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"You've changed..you're getting weak."
SCARAMOUCHE RP BLOG PFP ART/BANNER ART NOT MINE
!!!!!WARNING!!!!!
Scaramouche is a bitch. We are all aware that he is a bitch. Therefore, to make sure I am entirely in character, I must be a bitch as well.
If you are uncomfortable with verbal abuse, probably a capful of swears, possibly disturbing topics [human experimentation], and maybe even more, I'd suggest NOT interacting with this blog. Shit's gonna get rough here.
DISCLAIMER
The cause of this Scaramouche's existence is based on the stories of my ocs, who can be found at @realmflora . Make sure to check out the important threads down below. This means this blog is really selective, and I typically only interact with those involved in this story/my closer friends (Cyrillemod, the mod of the other two puppets, Wandermod).
-> RULES <-
•Pro-shits, Incest, homophobes, racists, transphobes, ableists, and anything of the sorts will not be accepted here. Anything I think contain these will be DELETED and you will be BLOCKED with no hesitation nor remorse. • NSFW isn't allowed. Suggestive stuff is, but only for Cyrille or topics related to Cyrille. • This blog contains oc x canon(technically not even canon). If you don't like it, that's fine. But don't send hate to me or the oc involved. • This isn't the only rp blog I'm running. I also have a girlfriend and school to keep up on. IF I DO NOT ANSWER YOUR ASK WITHIN THREE DAYS TIME, THEN YOU MAY RESEND IT. If you spam your ask, I will intentionally not answer it out of spite. Cry about it. -The exception to this rule is if I'm on hiatus. But that probably isn't happening any time soon. At least not again. • As you may have noticed, I curse frequently. So will Scaramouche. However, I don't overkill, and will not tolerate overkill either. Don't overuse swears to the point where it makes up more than 40% of your asks/roleplay replies. •No DM roleplaying. If you DM me, I will be ooc.
TAGS
divine knowledge - general emotionless doll - used when rp/ask contains heavy topics annoying co-workers - other fatui times changed - asks about wanderer/kabukimono/kizashi time bubble - Scaramouche confronting the time wall 🍵tea buddy - menthe menthe's family - other melusines linked joints - wanderer interactions a worthless insect - kabukimono interactions to spite the gods - cyrille interactions/asks
scara kinnie moment - ooc posts RP STUFF
text - speech [ text ] - actions {text} - thoughts Important Threads:
#time bubble / #menthe #the puppet and the heart #that serves as a nightmare Relationship Post:
TAKEN SIGN OFFS 🔍 ♠️❤️ 🧱 🎉 🐇🐸
OTHER ACCOUNTS 3 oc blogs, 2 HSR blogs, and 3 other genshin blogs. Not tagging them because Im lazy
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grandhotelabyss · 2 months
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The substack on "seperating the art from the artist" was interesting. But one detail lead me to a question - childrens books.
I know it was mostly used to mock people who don't want to engadge with anything "icky" as the demographic probably likes to say, but still.
So the question is, should books for kids be squeaky clean, be these gardens of eden were no evil shows its head, till they grow into the maturity which will let them confront the barbarity of literature vis a vis reality?
One could already use this as a segway to argue the opposite - that with the amount of adults not being able to deal with literature going against their provincal pseudo-morals, children should be "trained" from young age to not be like that - the point of childhood is paradoxically to grow out of it, even if many dont want to.
But on the other hand, and this may reveal myself to be the object of the previous high-nosed snot shower:
I kinda do feel "icky" when I think about all these kids books that try to be "hehe, I'm gonna show kids the real world!"
Like that Matilda author, forgot his name, I remember a year ago there was some fake drama about censorship which ofcourse was stupid but still
I do feel some kind of spite, that irony, that want to be subversive that goes against the idealised view of childhood.
Or maybe my realistic view - with all the cruelty and unavoidable misery - but that wants me to say, "why expose them to more of it?"
Because intuition tells me that those "edgy" childrens book have a simmilar ethos as a teenaged kid trying to teach a todler swear words, or to do a roman salute or whatever, this corrupting of the innocent for the sake of it.
But maybe this whole ramble is just the result of a Lacanian wish to crawl back into the vomb, my lile of Preussler's books just a want to become the little ghost who just can fly around in his eternal castle never growing up.
Still ofcourse I get that it is absurd to rant against Matilda with all the childrens media going way further in many ways and the fact that even I as a young child easily acceseed stuff I wasnt supossed to.
So maybe I answerred my own question - maybe there shouldnt even be childrens books in the first place, just books that are more and less apropriate for younger and yet younger kids.
(Also they should burn all those obviously on porpuse braindead picture books, you know the type lol)
Yes, as I discussed here, I didn't really read children's books unless made to and don't find it to be all that appealing a category. People thought comic books were like children's books, so I was happily reading Grant Morrison's occult phantasmagoria, Frank Miller's post-apocalyptic reactionary satire, and Alan Moore's Freudian traumatology of the archetypes at the age of five and six—and I wouldn't have it any other way. Anyway, the writers who shifted children's books out of their moralizing paradigm and into neo-modernist aesthetic integrity in the late 19th century tended to be either quasi-pedophiles like Carroll and Barrie or figures like Potter rather deliberately trying to expose children to the tooth-and-claw realities polite society otherwise evaded. Children's primordial innocence was a useful historical construct, the slowly evolving joint work of Christianity and the Enlightenment, and we are rightly suspicious of those who would tamper too much with it today; but it was a historical construct, it has produced its own return-of-the-repressed shadow (it's likely generated as much pedophilia as it's ever discouraged by inventing the taboo to be profaned), and it has been carried to unconscionable extremes of life-aversion and anti-intellectualism in our time (e.g., the "brain" doesn't "finish" till age 25 or whatever other ridiculous scientific myth of permanent incapacity we're supposed to believe based on the latest spate of fake "studies" these days). People are probably just people at any age from the onset of consciousness forward—I am aware of no great shift in the core of my identity since about the age of five and never thought of myself as a child—and, because there is alas no protecting everyone from everything in the end, they should at least be armed with knowledge and cultivation at the earliest possible moment.
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xxgothwhorexx · 2 years
Text
Trailer Park Trash: Prologue
Pairing: Eddie Munson x Reader.
Reader: Trans Guy . Goth . Femboy . 18
Warnings: This takes place in my own version of Hawkins and ignores the canon timeline and events.
Summary: Reader has just moved to Hawkins, on the first day of school he meets Hellfire.
Authors Note: This is my first attempt at writing a fanfic series, the pacing and grammar aren't perfect but I hope to improve.
First Person Perspective
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I moved to Hawkins for a new life, I'd spent far too much of mine pretending to be someone else. I had grown sick of people I no longer knew calling me by a name that was never mine, so I packed my bags and left.
Why Hawkins? It's actually very simple. I'm repeating my final year of highschool, I don't have the time to work a full-time job and it's suspiciously cheap to buy a place in Hawkins.
I decided to buy a trailer, it'd be easy to maintain and the initial payment wouldn't leave me broke for a month.
...
On the first day of school I walked in wearing my school-appropriate clothes. Based on the stares I was getting Hawkins hadn't seen many goths.
Morning classes went by sluggishly, I was met with snarky comments from my teachers in every class. The bell rang for lunch, I gathered my things and made my way to the cafeteria.
Walking through those doors was overwhelming, the room buzzed from all the chatter, a group of teens ran past almost knocking me over. My attention locked onto someone standing on a table. He's attractive, confident and making fun of social hierarchies.
"-BALLS INTO LAUNDRY BASKETS!!!" he shouts, after a brief confrontation with one of the jocks he sits down at the table, he's surrounded by an odd group all sporting the same logo on their shirt. Looking around the cafeteria it becomes clear that I won't be welcomed by most of my peers, I decide to try my luck with the hot guy and 'Hellfire'.
"Is this seat free?" I gesture to an empty chair.
"uh-" the group exchange glances then turn towards the guy sitting at the head of the table.
He smiles leaning forward, "You may sit" he makes a large sweeping motion with his arm.
I take a seat, without missing a beat the group resumes their earlier conversation. I want to join but decide to stay quiet, it seems like their friend had ditched them for the basketball team.
The guy stood up abruptly, "It seems luck is on your side little sheep, we have our replacement" all eyes turn to me.
...
And that's how I was indoctrinated into a Satanic cult...
Not actually, turns out Hellfire is just a DnD club. I filled in for their basketball friend that night, luckily I knew enough about DnD to get through the session without a hitch.
After the defeat of Vecna we decided that celebratory pizza was in order. Dustin called shotgun before we set foot outside, the rest of us crammed into the back of Eddie's van.
"BUCKLE UP BUTTERCUP, IT'S GONNA BE A BUMPY RIDE!!" Eddie yells over the music booming through his stereo.
When we arrived at Surfer Boy Pizza everyone was in a tangled pile on the floor.
"GET OFF ME!" Mike squealed.
"OUCH!!" Jeff squeaked.
"WHOSE ASS IS IN MY FACE!!?" Gareth shrieked.
Eddie was cackling from the drivers seat.
"GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE AND HELP ME MUNSON!!!"
...
We all stuffed our faces with pizza, I held the record of three whole slices in my mouth at once.
The guys were both horrified and impressed by my talent, Eddie didn't say a damn thing but the look on his face said it all.
Mike attempted to beat my record only to start choking on the second slice, thank the devil Dustin knew the heimlich maneuver.
After everyone had eaten more than their fill of pizza Eddie dropped them all home, I was the last stop.
"Where do you live pretty boy?" Pretty boy?! Jesus fucking christ this man was gonna be the death of me, my palms were so fucking sweaty.
"The trailer park, just go straight then make a left turn" I start giving directions only to be cut short.
"You're my new neighbor!" His face practically lights up.
"Wha- You live in the trailer park too??" How had I not noticed him??
"Hell yeah! Trailer park trash man!" He raised his hand for a high five, when our hands meet he intertwines our fingers.
I feel the heat rising in my face, my ears and cheeks burning. We remain holding hands for the rest of the ride, I never want this to end.
"Looks like we're here pretty boy" He turned to me, a cheeky grin on his face.
"Yeah I guess we are" He squeezes my hand before letting go.
"See ya tomorrow then"
"See ya then" I hop out of the van and go inside.
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| Prologue | Part 1 | [updates in progress]
Thanks for reading!! Writing tips are welcome, feel free to leave suggestions in the comments :)
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